#idk if I’m gonna ever be able to fully pull myself out of it

[gromlyn]

struggling through another art block, here’s a quick jon snow in the meantime

[none-tadashi-left-hiro]

can you guys all please actually actually be so kind to each other and I mean it tangibly like stop being a coward about what you’ll lose cause it doesn’t fucking matter more than being kind and you know it just fucking do what you can we’ve already lost so much what is the fucking cost of being kind to you anymore. people are so fucking desensitized to their own bullshit they’re dealing with like they’re so casual and blaise and ignorant about things that even harm them directly like why not at least be kind about it why not at least deal with the bullshit that comes from being kind instead i am so sad abt this why do people have to make it so hard. like I get capitalism and colonialism and whatever plays into people being raised to be unkind but are we that fucking fallible like that really fucking sucks bro

[dani-ya-dig]

Ok now that I’m fully awake. It’s time try and organize my thoughts on that audio oh my god.

Also trigger warning for mentions of suicide under the cut

That’s actually the first thing I wanna talk about, and is the only gripe I have with the entire video. Why the fuck wasn’t mentions of suicide tagged in the description??

Like I understand the concept wasn’t dwelled on and Sam didn’t outright say “I’m gonna fucking kill myself” but he PRETTY EXPLICITLY talked about how he planned to commit suicide even if he didn’t say those words. idk “chosen morality” doesn’t seem like the right warning for that? I’m not gonna complain abt it like too much, I just was a little confused on why it wasn’t tagged.

But anyways onto my jumbled up thoughts about the actual audio! Because as a member of the Sam Collins fandom, I have thoughttsssssss!!

THIS AUDIO MADE ME SOB! I couldn’t sleep because of how sad I was over it. Sam and Darlin need to be happy just for fucking ONCE, god give them a BREAKKKKKK.

The idea of them just silently holding each other on their roof with the night sky above them, a few tears probably falling from both of them. IM DUHXSJDIJFDJFHFHJ

AND MOTHERFUCKER THE VIDEO ENDING ON “Brown. My eyes were brown” I FELL TO THE FLOOR SHUT THE FUCK UP!

On a happier note about that, I KNEW Sam’s eyes were brown. I feel like almost everyone did tbh. I’ll tell you what gave it away though, the gentle way he says “please” to Darlin in some of his audios. Automatically gave it away that he would have had the biggest brown puppy dog eyes you have ever seen in your life. I’m physically sick over it, it’s not even funny.

Now back to the thing I desperately don’t wanna think about. Sam telling Darlin that he wasn’t planning on living forever.

That’s where the dam broke for me, I started bawling. It totally makes sense, I get it and I can’t say that it’s not a choice that makes sense given that Sam never wanted to be a vampire in the first place.

Do y’all think that he was planning to watch the sunrise on his roof? Because that was my first thought and it hurt real bad. Sam finally getting to feel the sunlight after so many years of having been deprived of it, only to be ash when the sun was fully in the sky.

Also I know damn well he probably would have done it after Darlin died and that’s what hurts so bad. If Darlin chose to be a vampire I think he would happily spend however long their eternity would be by their side, but once they were gone he probably wouldn’t feel a reason to stay. Especially because if Darlin turned into a vampire the two of them probably would have completely pulled away from all mortals before that would happen.

On that note, I don’t think Darlin is gonna want to be turned. I never really thought they would, unless they were under very specific circumstances. Sam telling them to spend time in their wolf form and with their pack before deciding solidified that for me 100%. I don’t think they would be able to lose their wolf which we know is a pretty big part of shifters, talking from Milo’s audio where he breaks down worried he was never going to be able to shift again. I don’t think they would be okay with the idea of watching their friends, and their family all start to wither away and eventually die while they remain.

Now, do I think Darlin is going to want to be turned? No. Do I think the dynamic of Darlin choosing to remain mortal opens a lot of really good angst possibilities? Yes. Do I fully trust Erik to not turn them anyways? Not really no.

If I had to put a bet in for how it would happen if Darlin got turned, it would be by Quinn. Quinn would find out or catch wind of the fact that they chose not to be turned (if he didn’t already know they would chose that) and turn them anyways just to hurt them.

(I think Alexis turning them is an interesting idea to think about, from any angle but I highly doubt that’s gonna happen lmao)

All in all I genuinely think that was the only audio that has affected me that much (aside from maybe listening to the inversion for the first time??)

[darklordofthesimp]

Ok I’m just gonna butt in here with my own unpopular(?) opinion, I’m neutral in the war and it’s not even necessarily that I dislike Sunny’s character, I think they’re written realistically and well, it’s more so that I relate a lot to Birdy. I’m not quite sure how to explain this. I’ve been in (kinda) a similar situation to Birdy’s, and had a person in my life a lot like Sunny. Being a sensitive person going through that much trauma and pretty much wanting to k word myself constantly and having an intellectual disability on top of that, forced proximity to my assailant, who was a lot larger than me physically and able to take advantage of my disability, is fucking torture. And then having someone come into my life and disregard everything I’ve been through because “they’ve been through worse,” telling me to “get over it,” and that I’m weak for not getting myself out of the darkest mental rut I have ever been in did NOT help. I understand the point of tough love and needing to get out of the cycle of self pity, I get that. But what I needed was support, not to feel like a weak and disgusting burden more than I already did. Idk I find faults in both characters. In my situation my assailant DID do what they did on purpose— I find myself a lot easier to forgive for mistakes than Birdy, even though the mistake ruined their life (at least that’s how they feel). I probably would’ve forgiven König faster, but not necessarily healed from the trauma faster. I find Sunshine’s character unrelatable because I myself just have so much compassion for Birdy— my knee jerk reaction is to help them get back on their feet by showing them that people still care for them. As opposed to Sunshine’s approach of, “the world doesn’t fucking care about anyone, get back on your feet because you’re all you’ve got.” It’s a difference in personality that I recognize. I don’t dislike Sunshine for it, it’s moreso that her character prods a part of myself that isn’t fully healed in it’s own way, I think. the person in my life that was sunshine-esque hurt me more than my own actual incident, so I find myself adverse to their character. Sorry to trauma dump in your ask box 😭 my point is I find them both realistic and beautifully written in their own ways. I still think they should kiss tho

I can totally understand where you're coming from especially when it comes to personal experience. Sunshine would never explicitly tell Birdy that no one cares straight out but there's a point, especially in the military, where you either remove yourself or you need to be removed. And I think where you and Birdy differ is that Birdy's incident was an accident that resulted in them getting hurt with a severely apologetic perpetrator and a loving team that has given them absolutely everything to rehabilitate. The issue is, Birdy will not even ATTEMPT to pull themselves from seeing themselves as a victim. They've fallen down a rabbit hole and they can't get out and Sunshine, while being jarring is the tough love that they need because they're not close to Sunshine. They're not reliant on Sunshine they don't feel betrayed by their lack of compassion because who the fuck is Sunny really?

Sunshine is the non-bias push that Birdy needs along with the compassion and care from their team.

[passiveasshole]

Late night sad thoughts

I’m fully in a relapse of the old habits.

I don’t know quite why other than I done already fucked up, why not allow myself more time to before I gotta clean it up again.

I am struggling to talk to Allen when I’m in these fixated moments. It’s not typical of our relationship for me to /not/ be able to tell him things. He knows the situation and we have established boundaries around it, but it’s just so different than the last time these things came about.

I also feel odd about my friendships. I wonder how many are still around bc it’s just been like that. Like I’m an old habit sticking around, one that will be forgotten and boxed up like an old toy or favorite now-to-tight t shirt.

Like the old habit I’ve pulled off the shelf.

It’s weird bc therapy is actually doing a lot, my relationships are generally stable, I’m not any more worried about money or the future as I was before…

Idk. I’m just in this weird inbetween of /good/ and /bad/. This limbo of knowing I can’t backslide more but I know it’s gonna hurt on the way up too.

Oh and my joints are doing extra bad, I’ve knocked my knee almost out of place (wherein it moves far too much into like a 270 degree rotation with a planed foot, makes a crunchy pop noise, and then is swollen) and my stomach painfully bloats when I eat just about anything so I’ve taken to about a meal and half a day. Which has been just so helpful difficult with the ever present ED thoughts.

[yikimiki]

thinking so fucking hard about loser/stoner eren and popular/mean girl reader............ how she'll tease him and bully him at school but when they're fucking its always the opposite way around........ he has such a grip on her and shes so whipped for him that the pent up teasing just comes out during sex and he is just being so mean to her

This is a different au from the other loser eren asks — aiming more towards stoner!eren x popular!reader!! Also this got really long?? It’s a mix of headcanons and drabbles so hold on

warnings: smut, dirty talk, mean dom eren, rough sex, crying, creampie, multiple rounds, spanking, hair pulling, mentions of drugs (weed), degradation, use of “bitch”, “slut”, “whore”, “cocksleeve”, no prep, ass play, size kink, dumbification, mentions of spitting, dubcon (just to be sure)

No but imagine... Eren is this outcast, unbothered type of guy that doesn’t give a fuck about the social hierarchy of college or whatever. For some sick and twisted reason, you are particularly interested in him — there’s something about his baggy clothes, long hair under his cap/beanie and his “fuck everything” attitude that gets you going. But you can’t really show that you’re attracted to a complete loser like him, it would ruin your reputation, so you have to pretend as if you love teasing him, mocking him. Which, like, it’s totally funny.

It works for some time, until you are alone in a room with him. It happens in some weird college party that you almost didn’t go to, when you decide to take a break from dealing with your drunk friends and find shelter in a bedroom somewhere. It takes you some time to find one that it’s not locked or... being used, but eventually you open the door to find Eren, just scrolling through his phone with a blunt hanging from his lips. This time, considering it’s just you and him, you skip the provocations and ask him what he’s doing alone in there, you sit next to him in bed and listen as he complains about some friend that dragged him to that obnoxious party.

“I was just passing some time before I found an excuse to leave,” he says, locking his phone and putting it on the nightstand. The smell of weed is filling the stuffed air, and Eren takes another hit before putting his blunt out. “And what are you doing here? Got tired of ruining everyone’s night and decided to ruin mine?”

“It’s always more fun with you.” You smile, one hand landing on his shoulder. Eren tenses under your touch, bright green eyes trying to see if you’re just making fun of him again. Still, there’s something else burning at the bottom of your irises that he has never seen before, something that makes his stomach clench in anticipation. “Besides… now I have you all to myself.”

“What are you getting at?” He asks, but his voice sounds lower, eyebrows furrowed in doubt. You two are close, so much closer than ever before, and he can feel your gentle breathing on his lips when you lean closer. His heart picks up, and his hands are fighting to touch your body. “If this is some sort of prank, I swear—“

“It’s not a prank,” you whisper, looking down at his lips. Eren swallows dry — it’s funny: even after months of teasing, this is the clearer reaction you’ve ever received from him. “Can I kiss you?”

Eren has never heard you ask for anything — especially from him. It takes him some time to warm up to the idea (and to make sure you’re not just fucking with him again), his cock stirring awake in his baggy pants, before he gives you a curt nod. You smile, leaning in and joining your lips in a heated kiss.

And you swear you have the upper hand for some time. You sit on his lap, run your fingers through his hair and watch as he becomes pudding under your touches — just groaning and sighing against your lips as his rough hands squeeze your ass, making you grind your pussy down against his hard cock until you’re soaking through the fabric. But then something in the air suddenly switches and Eren is turning you around, trapping you beneath his large body as his lips eagerly move down to your neck, hands practically tearing your top open so he can suck on your tits.

You whimper and ask him to slow down, but he’s not really listening at this point — if you’re giving yourself to him, he’s going to make good use of his time. Especially when he thinks you should learn one thing or two about how to properly behave, about not always getting what you want, but what you deserve after teasing him for so long. All those months of pent-up frustration are getting to his head, turning into a power trip as he notices that he’s so much stronger than you, that he can do whatever he wants and you’ll just have to take it. And he’s gonna make sure you’ll take it all.

In no time, you’re completely naked, clothes mindlessly thrown around the room and Eren is looking at your body like he can eat you whole. He asks you to “Turn around,” as he takes off his own clothes, and your surprised at the eagerness in which you follow his command. You don’t know what’s going on with you — all those bitter comments you’d throw at him are now long gone, barely a ghost at the back of your mind when you feel him shuffle closer to you. Eren pulls your hips upwards, presses your face down against the mattress and spanks your ass so hard you swear you see stars.

“Eren!” You cry out, both from pleasure and surprise. “What are you—“

“Shut up.” His hands come down against your ass once more, making you whine. “You never fucking stop talking, such an annoying bitch.” Your skin burns as he lays down more hits against your ass cheeks, your hands helplessly holding onto the bedsheets. “This is what you wanted, uh? Wanted me to snap, to treat you like the needy whore you are.”

“Y-Yes,” you stutter. Your pussy is so aroused that you just feel yourself dripping down your thighs, the coldness of the air making you shiver. You never needed someone as much as you needed him. “Eren, fuck me,” you sob.

His large figure leans over you, one hand yanking your hair back as his face stops next to yours. You can feel his cock — huge, throbbing, heavy — in between your sensitive ass cheeks, and the notion that he’s about to stretch you out so wide makes you whine. “Didn’t fucking listen, why don’t you get some fucking manners and try again?”

“Please, Eren, f-fuck me,” you utter, arching your back against his cock. You never noticed how big and strong he is, but now that he’s towering over you, you have no choice but to feel yourself shrinking beneath him. “Please, please.”

He scoffs. “Needy bitch,” but he releases your hair and pushes your face down against the mattress, using his free hand to align himself with your dripping cunt. “Not so fucking chatty now, are you?” You barely have time to answer before he’s pressing his cockhead against your pussy, your hole fluttering around his length as he continues to push in. Eren is huge, definitely the biggest you’ve ever had, and the lack of prep only makes you feel the stretch even more. “Shit, look at this tight fucking cunt,” he breathes out. His hands are squeezing your ass so hard you just know it’ll be sore in the morning, but you don’t care. “Can’t believe you kept this from me for so fucking long.”

You have half the thought of apologizing, but you can’t do it when he bottoms out. By the time that his cock is fully inside you, you can barely utter out an incomprehensible string of “S-So huge, E-Eren— too much— fuck, so big, I can’t take it, I can’t...” before he’s moving his cock in and out of you.

“Isn’t this what you wanted?” He asks, spanking your ass once again. The noise is so much louder this time, your moan following it shortly. “Fucking annoyed me for months just because you wanted to milk my cock like a desperate little whore,” he seethes, grabbing your ass forcefully as he drills into your soaking cunt. Eren is going hard and fast, so much so that you feel as if your brain is rattling inside your head, tits bouncing against the mattress as he continues his unforgiving pace. “Always knew you were a slut, I just didn’t know you’d be so fucking— shit — so fucking insufferable.”

“I’m s-sorry,” you whine, tears streaming down your face because of how good it all feels.

He scoffs. “Not yet. But you’ll be sorry.”

And boy how sorry you are. You had no idea that Eren would have that ridiculous amount of stamina, but you don’t even know how many times you’ve cum by the end of the night. Eren fucks you full of his cum again and again, spanking you and pulling your hair every time you misbehave and can’t keep it in like he tells you to — because “you’re such a dumb bitch, can’t even listen when you’re full of cock”.

He makes you cum on his fingers, on his cock, on his tongue, even makes you desperately grind against his thigh to get yourself off just because he likes how dumb you look. He fills every whole he can — spits in your mouth, fucks your throat, fingers your ass as he’s fucking you from the back and promises that next time it’ll be his cock. He’s just so mean, so revengeful of every time you annoyed him that he can’t be nice even if he tried. It’s just too good to have almighty little you turned into a stupid slut for his cock, crying and begging for him to fill you up one more time.

“Listen to me,” he hisses, making you turn your head to look at him. Your eyes are glazed over, barely able to find his with your orgasm building up again. “This is all you’re fucking good for,” he says, and his cock throbs inside you. Eren’s cum is seeping down your thighs, coating his length and making his slide easier as he continues to pound inside your abused cunt. “You’re made to be a cocksleeve, this pussy is made to take my cock. Do you understand?” You agree with a whiny yes. “Gonna stop fucking annoying me now? You can just ask and I’ll fuck you whenever you want, okay?” You nod, only half there, and for the first time that night he calls you “Good girl,” before stuffing you full of his cum again.”

Anyways???? Idk what came over me but yeah. Popular girl reader that is a complete slut for loser eren when theyre fucking. I rest my case.

[my-simp-land]

You Cheeky Slink

Bucky comes to you in the night to tell you about his latest google dive and maybe something more. Bucky x reader fluff. 1508 words. This is highkey self indulgent so get ready to read the fantasy thats been living in my head lately. Thanks :))

“Doll?”

Bucky stands at my door with just his head stuck into my room.

“Bucky, what are you doing? Where’s your shirt? You’re going to catch a cold wandering around with no clothes on,” I mumble from my pillow and plushie covered bed.

He smirks. He always does that smirk when he’s about to give some smartass response. That stupid lopsided smirk with he petal pink lips surrounded by the beard he’s been growing out. It’s kinda gangly but in a good way.

“Well, I guess I’ll have to come in then, so I don’t catch a cold in this freezing hallway. You know, you don't actually catch colds from being co-”

You had to stop the groan from falling past your lips. “Buck, love you and all, but now isn't the time to drop some of your newly found knowledge on me. It's...what time is it? Bucky, it is past midnight. Please tell me why you’re in my room at 12:38 a.m. talking about colds.”

Peter and I have been teaching Bucky how to use the internet and his phone, and We introduced him to Google a few days ago. Ever since then, he’s been catching himself up on most of what has happened in the last 70s years. It’s really heartwarming to see his interest in aerial technology and space exploration. We’re all glad that Bucky is adjusting well, but he’s been bombarding us all with random knowledge he’s found on the internet.

“Well, in all fairness, you were the one that invited me in, angel. I’m just doing what you said.” The smirk again. It’s too dark now that he's standing in my dark room, but I know the smirk. It bleeds into his voice. It makes him sound more...confident. Or cocky. “But dollface, we’ve explored more of space than we have the ocean. We don’t know what all is living in the deep parts of our ocean, but we know that you’ll get spaghettified if you go into a black hole. Some people think black holes are portals and some think they’re dying stars.”

“Wait, what? Buck, where are you getting your info?”

“Google, of course. Can I sit?”

“Sure.” The heavy weight of a giant man and his absurdly heavy metal arm rests on the corner of my bed. He almost seems hesitant to sit. I can immediately feel his warmth through the blanket. Despite me keeping my area freezing, Bucky always stays warm. “But Bucky, you went to a site to read these things. You used google but from there, what did you do?”

I can hear the wheels turning in his head. “Uh...the interesting looking ones?”

“You can’t believe everything you read on the internet, Buck. Anyone can put whatever they want out there. When you’re doing this research you’ve got to use reliable sources.”

“Reliable sources? Can I lean against the wall and stretch my legs?”

“Sure. Friday will help you with that, but Peter and I, and even Dr. Banner could help explain that to you in more detail tomorrow at a reasonable hour.”

Bucky shuffles his way across my bed to rest against the wall. He’s cautious of my legs as he makes his journey. It’s almost like he goes into assassin mode. Even though I know he’s moving, he tries his best not to disturb me.

“Well, did you know the footstep on the moon will likely stay there for at least 100 million years? There’s no wind on the moon, so it can’t be blown away. And did you know space is completely silent? There’s no air, so the sound waves have nothing to travel through so no sound.”

Bucky carries on with his space talk. Not long after we became friends, he shared that as a child he was interested in planes. He wanted to be a pilot growing up. That quickly became an awkward conversation. Now, Bucky is learning to fly with Sam, but once he learned our travels expanded into space, his dreams were out of this world. Bucky would start his google dives asking about some random thing, but without a doubt, he would end up on space exploration. Peter and I want to see how he’d do in a Wikipedia race. Peter thinks he would be amazing at it, but I know he’d get carried away and go down his own rabbit hole.

“Doll, Neptune has storms big enough to swallow the entire Earth! Can I get under the blankets?”

I hummed my approval and rolled over. Bucky’s voice is deep and raspy, and something about it can lull me to sleep. Usually I can’t sleep with any noise but Bucky is different. He could probably do audiobooks. Steve’s school videos and Bucky’s audiobooks. That’s quite a pair.

Bucky carries on with his space dump until I ask him. “Bucky, Russia got a satellite in space first. Sputnik. Would you have had anything to do about it? Idk. That might be a rough question but…”

He thinks, and he thinks hard. I can imagine his brows would come together, and he would bite at the right side of his lower lip. His Neptune blue eyes would move like he’s reading words off an invisible piece of paper laid before him. He would usually run his fingers through his hair, but Sam mentioned hair loss and that made Buck a little self conscious. I told him not to worry, but I’ll catch him catching himself.

“I’m not sure, angel. I don’t remember anything being about space, but maybe i just didn’t know it was about the space race. That is bizarre though. I was around when we made it to the moon, but I wasn’t. Can I get under the blankets?”

“Yeah, yeah.” Buck starts to talk again as he pulls the blankets over himself. He worms his legs undermine. “Bucky, get your popsicle legs off me. Go put those things on Steve.”

He lets out a small laugh before he continues his ted talk of everything. Bucky has been taken with space, but he’s interested in cooking too. He loves to sit and watch The Great British Bake-Off or MasterChef or Top Chef. It was quite sweet and funny when he tried to recreate one of the meat pies from season two of TGBBO. He was so confident, and his bottom was so soggy.

“We should grow a fruit salad tree. We’ve got to do something to a fruit tree, but we’d be able to make it grow up to 6 fruits! You could have peaches, Steve gets apples, Sam gets...I don’t know, and I get plums. We’d have to think of something for Pete. But imagine it, a huge fruit salad tree orchard behind the compound!”

“If it’s an orchard, why don’t we just plant a whole bunch of different trees?”

“Bragging rights. Can I lean on these pillows? I’m just gonna lean here.”

“Sure Buckbeak.”

“Hmph. Us having a fruit salad tree would be like the animals in Harry Potter.”

“Yeah?”

Bucky carries on, but his closeness and warmth are enough to lull me to sleep.

I woke up not too much later. Bucky has slowly made his way to fully laying between me and my pillow mountain. He’s pulled me in close to him and nuzzles his face into my neck. He somehow got his arms fully around me with my noticing. Our legs are intertwined, and thankfully, Bucky’s feet have warmed up. I can hear his heart beat in this position. Despite the torture and darkness he’s witness, his heart still beats like a young bird’s wings. His body and mind is old, but his heart is young. A young man from the 40s thrust into the 21st century. It is a cruel fate, but I know Bucky is strong enough to carry this burden. A heart is a heavy burden to carry.

I wake with the sun; a curious beam has made its way directly into my eyes. I go to grab a pillow to cover my face, but I seem to be in the death grip of a certain super soldier. I’m able to shimmy my way around to look at him. He looks at peace. Bucky always carries his anxieties and burdens, but in this moment, he looks youthful. He isn’t a super soldier who lost himself for 70 years. He isn’t a man who is widely hated and has to redeem himself. He isn’t a man with blood on his hands. He’s just Bucky; a great guy that will hold you when you cry or share a big bellied laugh with you.

“See something you like, dollface?”

“You slithered your slinky way into my bed.”

“No, no, no. You invited me in, so I wouldn't catch a cold. I just made myself not cold.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah. You were obviously the best solution, cuddle bug. Your heart is so full of love and compassion that it’s gone hot.”

“You’re a big sap.”

“Only for my best girl.”

[spinster-sisters]

[12:47am] jyn, cjh

TW: shower sex, threesome, no clear dom or sub dynamics, oral male reciving, gn! reader, idk man, also I used "bet" in a sexy way.

-

The whole room felt like a sauna. Condensation stuck the mirror and steam were flooding through the cracks in the shower curtains.

Yunho held you against the tile in the shower underneath the water, his lips were latched onto yours in a kiss almost as hot as the room around you and his dick was fully sheathed inside you. Maybe fucking wouldn't be the correct word. It was more like grinding. He was barely pulling out during his thrust, instead, he using his grip on your hips to force himself deeper inside you. You were both being rather obscene with your noises. Loud moans, groans, and whoppers echoed around the washroom, and Yunho's hips met yours with enough force to shake the wall behind you. It was inevitable that someone would have an issue with it.

"Oh my God! Yunho if you don't be quiet I'm going to get in there and pull you both apart myself!" You heard Jonghos distinctive voice call just as the door swung open. Yunho broke your kiss and looked at you with a mischievous glance, a smirk playing at his lips. His hips snapped into yours one again and the clearest moan of the evening tumbled past your lips, head falling back onto the tile. The shower curtain was still drawn but it was quite sheer. Jongho could easily see the outline of your meshed bodies.

"Don't think I won't Yunho" Jongho threatened again. Yunho giggled.

"Close the door Jongho," he said through his chuckle, though still not letting up on his pace. And to your surprise, control the younger boy complied and you lived heard the door click shut though over your boyfriend's shoulder you could still see his outline in the room.

You were trying to controll your noises. Not because you were shy, simply because it seemed like Jongho was legitimately upset. Yunho clearly didn't care, as when he reconnected your lips you clenched ever so slightly against his length and he groaned into your mouth as loud as ever.

"I sware to fucking-"

"Jongho, if you could feel what I do right now you wouldn't be able to shut up either."

Silence. Well kinda, a very distinct sound of skin sleeping could still be heard.

"Bet" the younger man called.

In an instant, Yunho had stopped moving and put you down on wobbling feet. The sudden emptiness left something to be desired but the dangerous glint in your boyfriend's eyes was enough to keep you interested. You weren't shy, not in the slightest. Was this uncharted territory? Definitely. But if this is going exactly where you thought it was you had no problems with that.

A moment later Yunho has pulled back the curtain. You were still mostly covered behind your boyfriend's body, and Jongho stood at the edge of the shower with his arms crossed and face determined, seemingly unbothered by your naked bodies in front of him dripping water. He and Yunho shared a deep almost challenging look, and by looking at his side profile you saw Yunho crack a smile.

"Fine then." He looked over his shoulder at you, "what do you say, sweetheart, wanna settle a bet?" You glanced over at the boy, eyes raking over his determined face as he met your gaze.

"I have no problem with that," you giggled. In a moment Jongho had pulled his clothes off his body and was stepping into the scorching water. You half expect him to be on the shy side, but right now he was oozing with confidence, and it was well deserved he looked great.

Yunho pulled you around him to face the boy and urged you onto your knees.

"I'm not just gonna let you fuck my baby, but they sure can use their mouth." He spoke affectionately petting your head. You looked up at Jongho with a smirk, and if it weren't for the excited glint hidden in his eyes and the hard dick in front of your face you would almost think he was unimpressed. Oh, how you were going to change that.

"Get going then," he demands expectantly. You reached out and took the hard length in your hand. The steaming water allowed you to easily glide your hand up and down, barely grazing the surface. You turned to your boyfriend and with one last cheeky nod, you set to work.

Today wasn't the day to tease. So opened your lips and took the length as far down as you could in one movement and swallowed. You heard Jongho's breath hitch but no noise escaped him, no good.

Pulling back up, your two hands wrapped around the base of his cock, pumping it slowly as you lower your lips to him again. This time wrapping them tightly around his tip and sucking. At this, the tiniest hint of noise came from the back of his throat.

"What was that?" Yunho chided, pushing your head further down. You made a garbled noise at the unexpected action, but regained yourself quickly and swirled your tongue around as much of his length ad you could.

"Nothing-g"

It would almost have been convincing save for that last little stutter. You increased your grip on the base, pumping it slowly. You hollowed out your cheeks and bobbed your head up and down the rest, leaving trails of saliva up and down his dick.

Although you were clearly wearing on him, you still had yet to receive the exact response you were looking for, when a sudden idea popped into your head. You pulled off of Jongho completely, save for one hand still gripping the base of his cock as hard as you could. And finally, a strangled moan left his lips.

Yunho chuckled, and you smirked satisfied.

"Not fair" he panted after a moment. And in response, your tongue came down and slid from the base to the tip, then roughly through the slit on his cock. He shuddered a gasp.

"Is that fairer?" You asked.

[beyondspaceandstars]

Nurse Din

Relationship: Din Djarin x Reader Warnings: N/A, just fluff! Summary: You seem to be coming down with a cold so the Mandalorian takes on a new role: a nurse. Based off the prompt: person b pressing their forehead against person a's forehead to check if they have a fever. A/N: this is one of the last fluffy one shots (i have a whole Din series i never posted on here...yet.....along with some smut.........will be posted at some point i promise) I have for my Mandalorian writing and honestly? I miss it. I will be writing for the Mandalorian again because idk it was just a nice time. I liked letting myself explore that world and characters :)

Masterlist

You woke up just feeling… bad. Your muscles were aching, your stomach was doing somersaults, and… oh, Maker, was that a burn in your throat?

"Ugh," you tried to groan at your disheveled state but it came out more like an aggressive cough which certainly did not help your throat.

You squirmed on the cot, taking advantage of the fact you were alone as your husband was already up doing whatever he did. (Okay — you did know his schedule but your uncomfortable state was preventing you from registering anything. You were just thankful you weren’t cramped together with him in this state.)

You were just starting to drift back to sleep as your heavy eyelids finally caved in from staring at nothing when something gave out a little coo next to you. Reluctantly, you peaked over your shoulder and came face-to-face with the small green child you had come to adore — well, he was adorable when he wasn’t waking you up.

"What?" You grumbled, your tired voice coming out rough. You let out another cough which Grogu just cocked his head at.

When you didn’t show signs of getting up, he started babbling again, trying to get your attention.

You forced yourself out of your near-dream state, furrowing your features wondering what in the galaxy he could want — oh. You were supposed to get him breakfast. In your delusional, ill state, you had completely forgotten your responsibilities.

Well, okay, you thought, it was just getting him breakfast, and then you could return to sleep. But even just the motions of sitting up in the cot made you hack up a lung. The child looked at you now fully concerned about what was going on with one of his parents. You tried catching your breath but the mixture of the coughing with the aching muscles and burning throat was taking a toll on you.

It wasn’t long into your coughing-fit that Din caught wind and came to check you. Usually, you were up by now, watching the child. When you weren’t awake and ready yet, he had simply thought Grogu was giving you a hard time. But when the unmistakable sound of coughing rang throughout the ship, Din realized there was much more going on. A mild panic set in as he made his way in to check on you.

"Riduur?" Din asked, entering the sleep quarters. He watched you slumped over in the bed, groaning in discomfort. The child was looking between you both, mostly wondering who was giving him breakfast.

"Hmm?" You hummed, turning to your concerned husband in the doorway. Shivers ran down your back. You reached for blankets, cuddling them tightly. Din made his way to bed picking up the child in the process and setting him on your pillow. Din stood at your side, looking down at you.

"What’s wrong, cyra’ika?" He asked, placing a loving hand on your shoulder, feeling you shake beneath his touch. Din wasn’t liking this one bit.

You coughed, clearing your throat and, said, "I think I caught a bug."

Din sighed and removed his helmet. Leaning down, he touched his forehead to yours, feeling the feverish warmth radiating off your skin as he did. More panic started settling in, realizing your hunch was very much correct.

You two had stopped the other day in a busy village totally ran over with a bustling population. You hadn’t thought much as you wove your way through the crowd to purchase the items you were looking for. But, as fate would have it, someone somewhere was incubating something and you caught it.

You melted into Din’s touch, letting your muscles relax a bit, even if it was a peculiar gesture. "What did you do that for?"

He pulled away and replaced his helmet. "What do you mean?" The muffled voice returned.

"You checked my fever with your forehead," you let out a weak chuckle, glancing up at him as you readjusted the blankets. "Don’t we have devices for that or something?"

Din shrugged, "I went the old fashioned route."

"I don’t even think they did that in the old times," you gave a small smile knowing fully well your husband was growing annoyed with you as the seconds went by. Well, what could you say? A little cold wasn’t taking away your feisty attitude

"You’re sick, can barely make it out of bed, and you want to argue with me about how I checked for a fever?" Din asked, his tone holding fake anger.

"Please," you paused, letting a small cough take over for a second. "I haven’t been able to focus on a single thought all morning. Be thankful I’m even awake and talking."

Another shiver came over you after you spoke, sending you into a shaking fit. You pulled the blankets but found you had already acquired all of them. Noticing your distress still, Grogu waddled from the pillows, making himself comfortable in your lap. He looked up at you, eyes squinting in concern. Your heart dropped as you realized you were still neglecting the little guy.

"Oh, shoot," you frowned, "you still need-,"

Din cut you off. "I’ll take care of him. You just rest, cyra’ika."

He scooped up Grogu who was still looking at you, confused. He cooed, trying to reach out to you. Din held him back and motioned for you to lay down.

"Are you sure?" You asked, curling up on the bed.

"Of course," Din nodded and tucked you into the blankets. You smiled stupidly at the care he was giving you.

It was a slightly miserable rest, but you were able to get what felt like just a few minutes (in reality, it had been a few hours) of sleepy bliss before Din came back with Grogu following closely behind. You blinked in confusion, trying to wake up as Din sat at the foot of the cot. Your mind didn’t feel as hazy as it had earlier but the aches were still as present as ever.

You rolled over, greeted by your husband. His helmet had been discarded again and he was watching you, a concerned look in his eyes. You tried giving a weak smile hoping to communicate you were okay. He didn’t seem convinced.

Breaking your stares, a soft babble came from next to the bed. You looked over and were greeted by the child who was holding a little thing of soup. While you couldn’t smell it well, it was steaming and looked fresh, making your stomach give the tiniest rumble.

"Soup?" You coughed. "For me?"

The child extended his arms, trying to hand you the bowl. Two big eyes peeked over the rim as he watched you, waiting. You sat up and graciously accepted the food. You held it close, taking small sips of the wonderful broth. You didn’t even really know there was soup on this ship so either someone spent a nice credit on it or Din had been holding out on you.

"Is it- Does it taste alright?" Din asked, seeming almost… nervous. You gulped down more broth, brows furrowed in questioning.

"It’s wonderful," you nodded. "Why? Is there something wrong with it?"

Din chuckled, "No, no. I just…" He paused, looking down at the floor and then back at you. "You’ve just never been sick before — well, none of us have ever been sick before — and I’m just not used to taking care of someone like… like this."

"Oh, honey-,"

But Din abruptly stood up before you could get anything else out. Planting a sweet kiss on your forehead, he mumbled, "I’m gonna find you some tea."

You frowned but nodded, continuing to drink your soup. You despised when he would do that. He’d open up a little bit and then shut down. Granted, he had gotten better at it the longer your relationship went but you thought marriage would be the helpful push he needed and it hadn’t added up like that so far. But it was fine. You took your own time to reassure him about things, putting words where his sometimes weren’t.

He came back moments later as you finished the last of your food. You handed the bowl back to Grogu who took a second to see if he could find any leftovers for himself. You gave a small smile watching him stick his head in the bowl, hunting.

Din gave you the cup of tea and, just like the soup, you cradled it close, sipping the liquid slowly. The continuous warmth was doing wonders for your throat.

"Maybe you should be a nurse," you said, peaking over the cup at your husband who was again taking a spot at the foot of the bed. He turned to you, a playful smirk on his face.

"A nurse?" He asked with a chuckle.

"Yeah," you nodded. "Retire and take care of some little ole sick folks like me. You’re doing such a good job at it."

"Was that sarcasm?"

You sighed, dropping the joking act. You reached your one hand to grasp his, which he happily welcomed, and said, "No, riduur, it wasn’t. I mean it. I’ve never felt so cared for before."

Din looked away as if taking in your words. He brought his other hand to pat your connected ones. After what felt like the longest seconds ever, he turned back to you, his grateful eyes meeting yours.

"I’m glad," he said. Your heart raged with love for the Mandalorian before you. Never did you think you’d find someone who comforting, so caring, and yet here he was like a fever dream.

You took in the love he had to offer and placed a light kiss on his cheek, trying to return it just a bit. He smiled and turned to place a real kiss on your lips, but your hand came up in protest.

"I’m disgusting," you explained, disconnecting your touch and returning to cuddling your tea. "Maker knows what germs I got brewing."

"Fine," he sighed, "but you owe me endless kisses once you’re better."

You smiled, "Endless kisses?"

Your husband nodded, "Oh, yeah. So many kisses your lips are going to be so sore."

"Sounds horrible," you giggled, taking a sip of your tea. "But worth it."

Din let out a low chuckle and got up from the bed. He returned a kiss to your cheek and said, "Finish your tea and then get more rest. You need it, cyra’ika."

You nodded in agreement and watched as Din picked up Grogu, and began carrying him out of the space.

"Come on," he said to the child who was watching you. "We need to let your mom sleep."

The child gave a little coo in either agreement or protest (you couldn’t tell but either way it was adorable). You smiled, watching them exit. Finishing up the last of your tea, you placed the cup on the floor and then curled back up in your blankets.

Drifting off, you relished in the comfort of everything. Sure, you were sick out of your mind, but you had two loves waiting for your recovery and eager to make you feel better any way they could. Oh, yeah. This was way more than you could’ve ever asked for.

[tumblezwei]

Why Kyoko Mogami is the GOAT

And why y’all are SLEEPING ON HER

Spoilers for Skip Beat, but honestly idk how much of the story I’m gonna get into for this since I’m flying by the seat of my pants. Still, read at your own risk.

Also this is LONG lmao

Kyoko Mogami is a 16 year old middle school drop-out that works two jobs day and night in order to pay rent for the Tokyo apartment that she lives in all by herself 6 days out of the week. Going into the first chapter, there are three things immediately clear about her. 

1. She’s cheerful, kind, and also kind of batshit insane. From the first moment we meet her, her personality is throwing itself at our faces and refusing to calm down. (apologies for the bad quality images, I work with what I have)

2. She loves Sho Fuwa, her childhood friend and rising rock-star that asked Kyoko to come with him to Tokyo after middle school graduation to support his career

3. Nothing matters to her as long as Sho is happy. Sure, she laments that her love for girly dresses, cosmetics, and fairy tale princesses will never amount to anything since all of her money is going toward paying the rent on her and Sho’s apartment, but that’s fine. As long as her precious Sho is happy, so is she. 

And, as you’d expect, things go to shit pretty quickly afterwards. During one her off days from her night job, Kyoko decides to visit Sho at his recording studio with dinner. After sneaking in past the hoards of squealing teenage girls waiting outside to catch a glimpse of him, she overhears him talking to his manager. 

“I’m the heir to a prominent Japanese inn, do you think I’ve ever cooked or cleaned all by myself?” She hears. 

“That’s awful,” the manager replies, “you make it sound as if you brought her just to be your maid.”

“She’s basically been my maid since I was a kid, or else I wouldn’t have brought her along with me. It’s not like I forced her, I asked her a question and gave her the choice. It’s only natural that she’d work her butt off to support me.” 

And he just keeps going. Once he’s made enough to live independently, he’ll send her back. How dare his parents try to set him up with a plain-looking girl like her. She doesn’t even wear make-up! 

As images of flash in Kyoko’s mind of standing in front of make-up stores with no money to buy anything, she takes Sho’s words just as well as one might expect. By unleashing the box of tucked away emotions she’s held in her chest and swearing to take revenge on Sho for using her and throwing her away like this.

. I failed to mention this at the start, but the beginning of the chapter introduces us to the most important piece of symbolism in Kyoko’s character development: Pandora’s box. 

For Kyoko’s entire life, she’s held this box inside herself. In myth, once this box was opened, all of the evil of the world is unleashed, never to be put back inside. So for Kyoko, the metaphor is quite apt. Hearing Sho’s words unlocks the box and unleashes a kind of anger that not even Kyoko knew she was capable of, a kind of determination and vengeance that has her dyeing her hair and staking outside of a talent manager’s house for days on end to whittle down his willpower and give her a chance to audition at Sho’s rival talent agency, LME. Every time she hears his name, or sees his picture, she’s filled with myopic sense of rage that no one can calm her down from. 

Her sole mission in life is to get revenge on Sho Fuwa, a sentiment that finds her at odds with LME’s top actor, Ren Tsuruga, who sees her one-sided quest for vengeance as an insult to people who truly love acting. But as if Kyoko cares, she needs to get revenge! 

I’m gonna drop the pseudo-narration for a bit because I actually need to skip over a fair bit of plot to get to what I think makes Kyoko incredibly compelling, outside of being the funniest female character in existence. We’re going to jump forward in time to Kyoko’s first acting gig. Well, not so much an gig as much as it is a competition. She’s been tasked to play the role of a dignified inn keeper that’s serving tea to the main male character. After having broken her ankle and been challenged by the real lead actress, this is her first shot to prove she has the talent to make it in the acting industry. So in order to immerse herself in the role, she utilizes her experience of being trained by Sho’s mother to take care of the inn that his family owned. It’s here that we finally understand that Kyoko giving up her life back home for Sho wasn’t just a spur of the moment decision brought about by infatuation. It was something she’d been doing for her entire life. Everything she knows how to do, every skill she’s obtained, has been because of Sho. And this is the moment that she realizes that fact too. (the first image is from after the scene is done, wherein Kyoko cannot snap herself out of her character due to the lessons she was taught as a child, despite her sitting position making her broken ankle unbearably painful). 

Even her righteous fury at being left in the dust is focused solely on Sho fucking Fuwa. Is there anything that she has than can be attributed to her own success? Does she have any skills that can’t be traced back to trying to make Sho happy? Who is Kyoko Mogami? Is she worth anything without Sho? 

And I want to make this clear right now, because I know the term “shoujo” makes people hesitate. THIS is what Skip Beat is about. Kyoko’s journey to find out who she is, and with every new role she takes on and with every experience she gains, she becomes just a little closer to finding out who she is and what she wants for herself. 

We watch as her love for acting slowly eclipses her thirst for revenge. A few arcs after this moment, she is contacted about a job to act in a music PV with none other than Sho himself. In the beginning, she accepts the job in order to prove to Sho that she’s climbing the ladder and catching up to him, but her performance suffers whenever she thinks about her revenge. And what saves her isn’t even putting aside her revenge, but prioritizing her own feelings above it. She wants to act! She wants to put on a good performance! So she needs to put aside those feelings of anger and draw from her past experiences to create a character that leaves Sho in the dust. 

I’m gonna bet y’all are wondering about the romance, though. Because this is a shoujo, and of course it has romance. But hey, guess what? That romance is equally compelling and is an integral part to Kyoko’s character too. In the first....5 or so arcs, Ren Tsuruga ‘s relationship with Kyoko crawls it’s way out of the it’s rocky beginnings, and he slowly becomes a mentor figure to Kyoko. He’s her superior in acting, and she looks to him often for support and guidance when she’s struggling to perform a role or having difficulty with her fellow actors. To Kyoko, Ren is the goal, his level of acting is what she aspires to be, so she can stand on equal footing with him. Before there’s even a whiff of romance between them, there develops a solid bond of trust and support. And once the romance starts. Hoo boy. 

To fully understand why it’s taken 12 years irl for a confession scene to finally take place, we need to bring back the metaphor of Pandora’s box. Because not everything escaped Pandora’s box when it was opened. Pandora was able to shut the box just in time for one thing to stay locked inside: hope. In the myth, this is a good thing, while negative and vile emotions run free, hope still exists within people to become better. But for Kyoko, the box isn’t a safe place, it’s a repressed place. She spent her entire life locking away the negative emotions she felt, placing a smile on her face and hoping for Sho’s happiness. And when those emotions are set lose, she locks the box back up, sealing something else inside. Her hope, her confidence in anything having to do with love. 

It’s not just that Kyoko isn’t in love anymore, she feels as if she can’t be in love anymore, that she’s entirely incapable of it. The idea of falling in love with someone else terrifies her. What if she goes back to the way she was before? An empty shell that exists for other people and not herself. The box has been sealed tightly again, and by God this time she’s not going to let anything open it. And like, I don’t want to spoil much in this, as contradictory as that sounds. Because the scene where she realizes she loves Ren? One of the best fucking scenes in any romance manga ever. 

And. God. I haven’t even touched on her mom. Kyoko’s desire for love, that became so warped under Sho and so desolate after his betrayal, can all stem back to Saena Mogami. A woman who, no matter what Kyoko did, rejected any affection that her child tried to give, and gave none in return. “Even a mother can hate her own child.” We get bits and pieces of what Kyoko’s mother was like, and the environment that a very young Kyoko was raised in before her mother left her in the care of Sho’s parents. And eventually we realize that Kyoko isn’t afraid of her love being rejected twice, but a third time. 

Like, y’all, I’m not good at these kind of essays. I keep wanting to go off on tangents, nothing is ever focused, I spend to much time just reading the manga instead of writing this fucking post. But please believe me when I tell you that Kyoko Mogamis character development is like none other. She’s truly at the top of her genre and it’s an actual crime that she’s so underrated. 

I HAVEN’T EVEN TALKED ABOUT KANAE, THE WEISS TO HER RUBY, THE TSUNDERE TO HER GENKI

Before Kyoko gets even a single arc with Ren, she gets two with Kanae. The first with Kanae as a central figure, and the second where Kanae is her support. She’s the one that gives Kyoko the eureka moment she needs to pull of her performance with Sho. They are one of the most developed and deep friendships in shoujo that I’ve ever seen AND Y’ALL NEED TO STOP SLEEPING ON IT. LOOK AT THESE TWO

And don’t take this poorly assembled post at face value, I’ve left out a lot of shit. Starting with how fucking funny this manga is. Kyoko’s special talent for her LME audition is peeling vegetables, there’s a running gag where Ren asks for her advice while she’s in a giant chicken costume, unaware that it’s her, the president of LME is an eccentric millionaire that likes to dress up in different themed costumes every day and loves throwing extravagant parties, Kyoko’s hobby is making voodoo dolls and talks to a miniature Ren doll whenever she needs encouragement or advice. 

And it’s all packaged alongside some of the most compelling character development I’ve ever seen (for both Kyoko and Ren), and some absolutely heartbreaking drama. You will never know true pain until “I don’t have a daughter.”

Read this, ya’ll. You won’t regret it. 

[timextoxhajima]

Playlist Feels

Member: *at the point of writing this i haven’t yet decided but i went out today and this song started playing and my heart just starting beATInG SO faST

*update: ended up settling for san

A/N: I won’t write smut/anything aggressive for jongho (or any ‘00 liner for that matter) so until they turn 21 internationally, i’ll refrain from writing anything nasty. this goes for other idols who are ‘00 liners and younger.

Genre: shitty-ass angst, aggressive shoving lol idk, what’s a desire-inspired fic if there’s no smut heh (lowkey fifty shades vibes irdk what im doing at this point of time) *kind reminder that it’s been too fucking long since i’ve written some smexy smut so please bear with me ;_;

Word Count: 3.6k

you could almost smell the money that everybody in the room collectively have under their belts. everybody was fitted in suits and extravagant gowns and blazers and dresses-- it was difficult to believe that these people would ever wear anything else besides whatever they were wearing now.

your parents had gone off to greet the older, more important people of the organisation, or bureau, or whatever group that coordinated this event was called. you were stuck staring at your glass of champagne while your fiance picks at the little nuts in the tray that was sitting in the middle of the small table. 

fiance, more like annoying family friend you’ve been actual friends with for nearly ten years. 

“do me a favour and cut it out, would you?” you glare at him through your long, false lashes, bringing the champagne glass to your lips and taking a sip. mingi looks at you and pouts, quickly throwing a nut into his mouth before he wipes the crumbs away on his shit-expensive Saint Laurent blazer. 

you groan under your breath, rolling your eyes so hard that you could see the insides of your head. 

“who picked out the gown? i know you have a thing against gowns so why’d you let them fit you in this one?” mingi munches on the nut and nods towards your fit. you don’t bother to look down at yourself, because you couldn’t stand the sight of it. 

the v-neck cutting was so low down your chest that if you pulled it aside with any considerable amount of strength, your chest would’ve been exposed. 

it didn’t help that the gown was red, and on top of that, there was a long, ridiculous slit up the dress by your left leg. 

it’s like you were a walking target. 

“does it look like i had much of a choice?” you eye him with an annoyed look, finishing whatever was left of the champagne. “in fact, i don’t even remember the last time i made a decision for myself. fun.”

mingi gives you a pathetic smile and wraps his arm around your shoulders, the soft material of his blazer grazing against your skin. 

someone pushes the door open to the function room, and everybody around starts making their way in. your heels would’ve been caught stepping on your gown, so mingi offers you and arm to hold while you grab a bunch of material with your free hand to make walking easier.

your fiance helps you settle into your seat before sitting down next to you. the function room starts filling up, every now and then some ceo or businessman or someone walks by your table and you have no choice but to stand up to greet them. 

but all you wanted to do was to go home to the comfort of your bed and binge watch your favourite series.

not stand here, in the middle of a function room in the country’s most expensive hotel, and let these middle-aged, possibly married-with-children, men caress your hands like they didn’t already know you had a fiance. 

“you seem to have a way around men, don’t you?” mingi teases quietly, helping you push the chair in as you sat down from shaking some stranger’s hand. 

“it’s the dress, and the hair and the make up. otherwise, i’m pretty sure they don’t give a fuck.” 

mingi sucks on his teeth at your straightforward statement, noting that your parents were coming round the table. you look up to search for them upon mingi’s announcement, and you notice they were talking to another couple with their children trailing closely behind them. 

“oh god, another one--” you spit under your breath. mingi elbows you a little, standing up and cuing you to do the same as your parents come by with the other couple and their clearly-uninterested son and overly-enthusiastic daughter.  

“mingi, y/n, this is mr and mrs choi, and this is choi haneul and choi san,” your mother gestures to them as the couple reaches out for a handshake. you and mingi take turns to shake their hands, including the two children. 

you were so used to faking a smile that you were sure nobody could’ve been able to tell you absolutely hated being here. 

but your ‘service’ smile struggles to remain loyal to your need to be the perfect chaebol when you catch their son staring at you, with eyes that could kill. 

you reach your palm out to him, and he takes your hand with a firm grip. 

you almost feel something similar to static, but you shake it off by giving him a bright smile.

he reciprocates, offering you a wide grin that exposes his dimples and folded his eyes into long, slits. 

that 180 degree switch... psycho.

you pull away, and you feel his reluctance to let go for a split second. 

a frown appears on your forehead in that instant, but he releases your hand quickly, as if noticing the change of expression on your face. 

your parents wave them off as they make their way to another table. you return to your seat, now sitting between mingi and your mother who just wouldn’t shut up about the choi family.

something about splitting the company into two so each their children gets an equal half. 

something about them being very capable. 

blah blah blah...

the function hall gets filled up and every table was fully occupied. name tags were placed on tables by the seats the guests were allocated, and your eyes run through the many names and titles. you couldn’t find a single one that didn’t have a big company name attached to them. 

mingi humors you the entire dinner, and being your only source of entertainment, you couldn’t help but still feel lucky that he was chosen to be your fiance.

there were so many things about being a chaebol that was so wrong and so pathetic, and mingi knew very well how much you hated it. both of you grew up as childhood friends, for the sole reason that both your parents were partners in an important project. 

so big, rich people gatherings? your weekend plans for almost ten years straight.

when you were told that a marriage was in plan for you though, you remember threatening to run away from home unless your fiance was mingi.

and since mingi was a chaebol himself, your parents were more than happy to let the both of you get engaged, even if the two of you didn’t actually love one another. 

there was some dumb auction going on with the mc yelling into the damn mic every ten minutes, not even giving you the peace of day to eat your food that took forever to come. mingi tries to get you involved by raising your name tag, helping you offer three million for a premium yacht.

you hiss at him, nearly giving him a slap across the face when you won it.

your mother reminds you not to have too much wine and champagne, but you didn’t even want to be here in the first place. you were going to get married into the song family anyway, so it gave you the courage and liberty to do whatever the hell you wanted. 

you were so used to drinking champagne and wine that mingi doesn’t stop you until your face finally flushed bright red, and you were beginning to smile and giggle at the mc. 

an unfamiliar sight for your fiance. 

“do you need to go to the washroom to get yourself together? you look tipsy,” mingi leans into your ear and asks with concern. his question pulls out an ugly look on your face, and you reach for your champagne glass, only to realise that it was empty. 

you huff in disappointment. mingi gives you a blank look, knowing that you weren’t done with whatever attitude you had up your sleeve tonight. 

“i’m gonna hurl out all that fucking champagne and you better have my glass refilled when i get back,” you try to whisper to mingi, but you belch out all the gas that was in your stomach. 

“disgusting--” mingi winces at the scent of the alcohol. you laugh, pushing yourself out of the seat and grabbing your purse, leaning over to your parents to inform them you were heading for the washroom. 

it was a good thing you weren’t drunk, but you definitely would be if you had returned for more champagne had you not stuffed your finger down your throat. you wretched loudly, knowing that you deliberately searched for the most out-of-the-way washroom in the building, and there was nobody around to hear those inhumane noises. expensive liquid flushes out your throat and you choke on the sight. the burning sensation wasn’t a good experience, but you couldn’t be any less bothered.

you lick your lips, still cautious that you had lipstick on. turning around, you struggle to your feet and head over to the sink, head hanging low and palms pressed flat against the marble surface. 

you gather the tap water in your hand, slurping it up to try and get rid of the taste of stomach acid and alcohol in your mouth. 

didn’t help. 

you mutter some curse words under your breath, looking back up at the mirror to fix your hair and your lipstick, pulling your shoulders back so you were standing with the posture your mother spent most of your life scolding you about. 

you take a step out of the washroom, and your eyes were so occupied with mentally berating the hell out of your obscene dress that you physically ram yourself into someone’s shoulder. 

the impact throws your balance off completely, but you feel an arm snake around your waist just moments before you got fall flat on the ground. 

“oh, you.”

you fidget with uneasiness, anxiously getting your balance back in check and shoving him off you. you look down at yourself, making sure your boobs were still under the material and your slit didn’t get any higher up your thighs. 

“you’re welcome, by the way.”

you return your attention to choi san, who now had a sneaky smirk drawn across his lips. he was in an all white fit, with small black details like his cuff links and black gemstone accentuating his entire look. 

“sorry.”

you clear your throat, feeling your face flush from the realisation that you could’ve been completely fucked over by your parents if they saw the way you responded. 

‘that’s no way of thanking someone,” they’d say. 

“what are you doing here anyway? it’s such a far walk from the function hall.”

you raise a cocky brow, tongue looking for small bits of food stuck in the crevices of your teeth. you couldn’t be bothered to maintain your image now that you’ve already acted like he was molesting you. 

“me? i could ask you the same,” you tilt your head to the side, hands looking for the slit of your dress to push aside. you wouldn’t want to trip on your walk away from him. 

“i don’t like these functions. i like meeting people but i definitely don’t like watching them spend their money on ridiculous items.”

you sigh, wondering how long you were going to be stuck in this meaningless conversation with him. 

“you do realise the proceeds all go to charity anyway, don’t you?” 

“is that why you bought the premium yacht for three million?”

“no, my fiance used my name.”

“so you’re saying you didn’t want to provide the financial assistance to charity?”

your eyes harden at his accusation, and you couldn’t be more frustrated. if you weren’t in your obscene v-neck gown with that useless slit up your thighs, you would’ve already gotten your heels off to whack him on the head. 

all your emotions must’ve been put up for display all across your face, because choi san flashes you a devilish grin, eradicating any hint of his dimple-smile from before. 

the same 180 change.

“my family and i do enough charity every year. this three million doesn’t mean shit,” you take a step forward, not letting his demonic presence faze you. he was just about a few inches taller than you, so confronting him like this was nothing compared to mingi.

“so, mr choi,” you hiss under your breath, your nose just right under his. “if you’ve got nothing else constructive to say, then do excuse me. i have an event to be at.”

you gave it a few moments for him to flinch or react, but he fails. you smirk to yourself, convinced that you’ve won this showdown. you turn, ready to walk away from him, but he grabs your arm just as you walk past him and wraps his arm around your waist. if he had invested more effort into the act, he would’ve easily picked you up.

“what the fuck-- let me go!” you try thrashing yourself out of his grip, but he only pulls you harder into the hidden lift around the corner. you try to make a run for the door before it closes, but he holds you back as he hits a button on the lift panel.

he shoves you up against the wall, your rear resting against the bar that lined the walls where people could hold. he rests his palms on the bar on either sides of your hips, and he pushes his face dangerously close to yours. 

you were fuming at this psycho, but deep down in your heart, you knew you were the one to blame for inciting it. 

“you know...” he drags a finger down your earlobe and your jawline. it takes you awhile to realise that you were slowly turning away from him, gradually becoming unable to continue this power play with him. “you haven’t said ‘thank you’.”

you scoff, eyes shifting to meet his without turning your head. you wipe your canine teeth with your tongue, trying your best to read his face. 

but all you could see was that devilish grin you don’t think you were ever going to forget. 

you try to hold back from saying anything, knowing that every word you said from this moment on was going to decide his next move. but you were angry with this piece of shit, and your temper invites you to spit out the words you had on the tip of your tongue. 

“or what?”

i should not have said that. 

“that’s completely up to you.”

choi san smirks again, and you’ve never seen someone look so lustfully challenged before. the look in his eyes was enough to rile you up to it as well. though your head was screaming at you, telling you to stop, but your heart and body say otherwise. 

he sucks in a deep breath as he takes a step back, letting the lift doors open to the hallway where all the suites were. 

you expected him to grab your wrist and pull you along, but he doesn’t. confusion wasn’t the right word to describe the overwhelming feeling that ate you up, and you hated yourself for it. 

you watch in dissatisfaction as he calmly walks out of the lift and walks down about four doors. he stops right outside the cream colored door, his white fit contrasting the brown hallways, and turns to look at you.

that devilish smile was gone, replaced with a look you couldn’t begin to describe. 

you feel your stomach churn as he reaches up to his neck and starts to undo the top few buttons, exposing his collarbone. his free hand pulls out a card from the inside of his blazer, and he gets the door open. 

your hands were balled up into fists, and you could still feel his trace on your jaw as you watched him walk into the room. 

don’t do it.

you suck in a deep breath, frozen in place. 

don’t fucking do it. he knows exactly what he’s doing. 

the lift doors begin to shut. 

don’t. do. it. 

your needs and desires engulf you like flames in a burning building, and you found yourself storming straight into the suite, eyes only searching for him. before you could even notice the size of the room, you were shoved backwards against the carpeted wall.

hands were hungrily searching your body for any crevice for him to dig into, and you could already feel your lipstick getting smudged between both your lips. 

his fingers find the material of your dress that goes over your shoulders instead, and he doesn’t hesitate to pull them down your arms. you struggle to get his white blazer off, completely ignoring the rare gem that was pinned above his breast pocket. 

you were already running out of breath, teeth clashing and your tongues messily swirling around each other as his hands find the zip on your back. by the time your dress pools around your feet, you get the buttons on his shirt undone. 

you run your hands down his chest and toned stomach, but was interrupted by him picking you up against the wall. he doesn’t hesitate to attach his lips to your breasts like a hungry kitten, and the heat between the two of you becomes nearly impossible to contain.

his hair gets tangled in your fingers, desperately trying to find something to grip while lewd sounds escape your lips.

“you must not like losing,” he pulls you away from the wall, eyes looking up at you as he walks elsewhere in the room. you expected yourself to be thrown on a bed, but instead you find yourself pressed up against the window panel of the room, with the city right below your feet. 

“don’t you fucking dare,” you threaten with a low voice. but you hear him scoff, arm wrapped around your waist as he positions himself so that you were pressed flat against his chest and your breasts against the cold surface of the window. 

“but i already did.”

he whispers into your ear, somehow finding both your wrists and holding them in one hand while the other snakes down your stomach and under the only piece of clothing you were wearing. 

you bite on your bottom lip, shutting your eyes tightly upon the contact of his fingers on your sensitive spot. you hear him chuckle and he realises that you had absolutely no control over what your body needed - or wanted.

“aren’t you going to tell me that you have a fiance?” his voice was low, and almost threatening. he hooks your underwear by the side and pulls it off the curve of your rear, letting it pool around the heels you were still wearing. 

you gulp and huff heavily, listening to him undo his belt while your wrists were still trapped in his left hand. 

“answer the question, mrs song.” he presses his already hardened manhood against your core, and the contact sends chills up your spine to your head. you could feel yourself slowly losing all sense of control by the second, and him psychologically pushing you into a corner to make you submit to him wasn’t helping. 

“we could always stop now, and you could go back to the function hall like nothing happened.”

now you don’t feel the material of his underwear, but the bare skin of his manhood rubbing against your naked core. the sensation finally pushes you over the edge, and you choose your desires over the fucking obligations you were born with.

“please don’t stop.”

you brace yourself as he pushes himself into you, and he doesn’t give you much time to process the explosive feelings of need in your abdomen. picking up his pace, you feel his grip on your wrists tightening as the excessive thrusting pushes you nearer and nearer against the glass.

you hear nothing but the obscene sounds of skin slapping against skin, and the combination of the mewls and groans the both of you were offering one another. 

his free hand finds your sensitive nub, and the combination of his ramming into you with the circles drawn with pressure pushes you closer to your climax. your legs tremble under the overwhelming feeling, and he finally releases your wrists. he wraps his arm around your waist, holding you up while he continues fucking you against the window. 

you feel the weight in your abdomen get heavier after every thrust, and your irregular moans tell him that you were reaching your high. 

something inside you snaps, and you raise your head to look at the window, water vapour already collected in messy patterns on the surface. 

he pulls out and you feel his load landing on your lower back, the only sounds you could hear now was the panting from the both of you. 

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

you take your seat between mingi and your mother again, legs still shaking ever so slightly, and you were hoping nobody was going to notice that your hair didn’t look at neat as it was before.

“i thought you got lost in the bathroom,” mingi looks at you while you down a whole cup of water before attacking the champagne. 

“well,” you shrug, eyes catching a glance of choi san returning to his seat. “i’m here now, aren’t i?”

[crystalstar8]

Knights of the Night (ch 10)

Chapter 10

Ch 1, ch 2, ch 3, ch 4, ch 5, ch 6, ch 7, ch 8, ch 9, ch 10

https://archiveofourown.org/works/29139240/chapters/71536491

pairing: Jungkook x oc

genre: vampire au, college au, twilight, romance

word count: 2,494

warnings: blood (obviously), kidnapping, child kidnapping, needles, France

notes: vampires, vampire au, college, college au, so many twilight references, blood, needles, kidnapping, children, homelessness, dance, ballet, flashbacks, romance, slow burn, probably no smut, idk yet tho, France, French things, attempted genocide, inaccurate French history, bisexual main character, @strawberriewithchocolate-blog @mozy-j  @daechwitad-2​ @zobadak​​

summary: Catalina starts college in a small town all the way across the country. She doesn’t know anyone and isn’t exactly looking for friends. She just wants to focus on dance. But when she meets fellow dance major, Jimin, and adventurous, fellow freshman, Jungkook, Catalina ends up discovering a whole new side to the small college town; one that is dangerous but oh so enticing…

          Jungkook and Catalina decided to keep the pictures to themselves for a while. It seemed like the den in the basement was part of a bigger organization than they thought, so they knew they’d have to be careful. Over the next few days, they debated whether to tell the police or to tell their friends. In the end, they decided to tell Namjoon. He was mad at them at first, but then told them to stay out of it. That he and Yoongi were already investigating and that it was way too dangerous for humans.

          As a way to distract them, or maybe just to give everyone a vacation, Namjoon booked a few nights for everyone at the ski lodge during the first week of snow. It was mid-week, so hopefully the lodge wouldn’t be busy.

          Catalina was excited. She had spent the day before the trip packing and daydreaming about what the lodge would be like. She’s never been a cold weather person, but Jungkook promised to teach her how to ski, and while skiing didn’t really do anything for her, Catalina was at the point where any time spent with Jungkook was a good time. He never brought up the kiss since it happened, but Catalina was unable to think about anything else. It was constantly on her mind, the way his body felt against hers, his hand in her hair, his soft lips… it was truly something she’s been losing sleep over.

          So when Catalina found out they’d all be staying in three connecting rooms, slumber party style, Catalina didn’t really know what to do with herself.

          The morning of the trip finally arrived and Catalina was ready. Her duffel bag was packed and she kept glancing at her phone, waiting for the text saying her ride was here. Last night, Hoseok had texted her that they rented a party bus to take them up the mountain.

          Finally, her phone buzzed, Hoseok’s name showing up on the screen.

          Hobi: we’re outside :D

          Catalina grabbed her bag and ran downstairs. The party bus was parked in front of her apartment building and the doors opened as she approached. Inside the bus, the four vampires sat on the bench seats on one side while Jin sat across from them.

          “Cat! Just throw your bag back there and have a seat!” said Hoseok. Catalina spotted the pile of bags in the back of the bus. She set hers down and took a seat by Jin. The doors of the bus closed and the bus started moving.

          “We just have a few more stops and then we’re on our way up the mountain!” Hoseok shouted. He was practically bouncing in his seat.

          “I’ve never been to a lodge before,” said Catalina. “I heard they have a hot tub up there.”

          “Oh yeah, they have a bunch of hot tubs, and a spa,” said Hoseok. “Are you gonna learn how to ski?”

          “I mean, Jungkook will probably make sure of it, but I don’t think that’s what I’ll be doing most of the time,” said Catalina.

          “I’m pretty good at skiing, if I do say so myself,” Jin said as the bus came to another stop. Jungkook hopped on and tossed his bag, skis and snowboard onto the pile in the back of the bus.

          “Is Jin talking about how good he is at skiing?” asked Jungkook, collapsing into the spot next to Catalina.

          “I was just about to tell them that I won a medal once-“ Jin started.

          “But his old bones don’t let do the things he used to in his youth,” said Jungkook. “So we might need to help him with the bigger slopes.”

          Jin launched himself past Catalina, attacking a giggling Jungkook.

          They stopped two more times, to pick up Jimin and Jimmy K, then they made their way up the mountain. Once the lodge came into view, Catalina understood why it was so popular. It was beautiful, all wood and logs and rocky landscaping. Snow dusted pine trees filled in every gap in and around the property. Ski lift wires ran back and forth behind the lodge, leading up even higher into the morning fog.

          “Oh wow! This place is fancy!” said Catalina. She was kneeling on the seat, looking out the window at the approaching property. The bus parked at the main entrance and everyone grabbed their bags and got off, heading into the building. Namjoon checked them all in and then led the way to their rooms.

          It turned out to be a huge, three room suite, so luxurious that Catalina once again wondered how wealthy these vampires were. The suite was rustic, all raw wood and furs, antlers above the hearth. There were two king sized beds in each room, plenty of space for everyone. Catalina wondered who she would share a bed with. She hoped it wasn’t Jungkook. Not that she didn’t want to be close to him, but she was afraid it would be too awkward and she wouldn’t end up getting any sleep. As it was, she already noticed herself avoiding him and staring at him from afar. She needed to snap out of it and act like an adult.

          Her behavior wasn’t as subtle as she thought though, because once everyone was settled, Jimin pulled her out into the hallway and asked, “What’s going on with you and Jungkook?”

          Catalina started at him with wide eyes. “What do you mean?”

          “Come on, don’t play dumb,” he said. “You guys are usually all over each other, joking and laughing at everything. What happened? Did you guys fight?”

          Catalina sighed and pulled Jimin further down the hall.

          “We kissed,” she said. Jimin’s eyes almost fell out of his head.

          “What?!”

          “Shhhhh!”

          “When?” he asked.

          “A while ago, we snuck into a vampire den and almost got caught, but to avoid suspicion, we acted like we were just making out in one of the rooms,” said Catalina. “It worked, they didn’t suspect us, they just kicked us out, but I’ve been thinking about it ever since.”

          “Have you talked about it with him?” asked Jimin. “I mean, do you like him?”

               “I…yeah, I think I actually do,” Catalina said, her face burning up. “And no, we haven’t talked about it.”

               “You don’t think he was just leading you on, do you?” asked Jimin. “I can be mean to him if you want me to.”

               “No,” Catalina laughed. “He wouldn’t do that. I don’t think he knows I like him and I don’t think he feels the same way about me.”

               “I can find out for you,” said Jimin.

               Catalina chuckled and said, “It’s okay, really. I just need to get over this awkwardness and figure out how to be normal around him again.”

               “Whatever you say, but I just want you to know that I can be an amazing wingman,” said Jimin.

               “Thank you,” said Catalina. “I’ll let you know.”

               A few hours later found Catalina at the top of a hill, struggling to get her feet into her rented skis. Jungkook skid over to her with a huge smile on his face.

               “Are you excited?” he asked.

               “I guess” said Catalina. “I’m more nervous than anything.”

               It was true. Before she started putting on her skis, she had looked down the slope and it looked incredibly intimidating.

               “Don’t worry, I’ll come get you if you crash,” he said.

               Catalina didn’t want to crash. But she finished putting on her skis and, with Jungkook’s help, got to her feet. Jimin was at the edge of the slope.

               “I’ll see you guys at the bottom!” he said before taking off.

               “Okay, so you gotta keep your knees bent,” said Jungkook. “Just keep them bent and use them to bounce. Gravity’s gonna do most of the work. Use these to steer and control your speed. You can kind of turn sideways to stop yourself. This one isn’t too steep so you should be okay.”

               “This isn’t steep?!” Catalina asked, shuffling to the edge.

               “Just go ahead when you’re ready,” he said.

               “Wait, I’m not going first!” she said.

               “Yes you are,” Jungkook laughed. “If you fall or hit something, I gotta be able to follow you down to help.”

               Catalina eyed the slope once more, took a deep breath, then pushed herself off. At first, she had to use the poles to get moving, but then, as Jungkook had said, gravity mostly took over. This isn’t too bad, Catalina thought. Actually, this is a lot of fun. But then her speed started to pick up. A lot. Her heart picked up as well. The first bump she hit barely got her off the ground, but it was enough to make her panic when she hit the ground again. She started to swerve towards the trees. She dodged the first tree as best as she could, but shoulder checked it hard. This knocked her off balance, but luckily, the next obstacle was a snowbank. It didn’t hurt, but she fully landed in the bank, sliding off the side to lay on the ground.

               She pulled her goggles off and let out a groan. It didn’t take long before she heard another set of skis slide to a halt beside her.

               “Are you okay?” Jungkook asked as he knelt beside her. “Are you hurt?”

               Catalina waved a hand. “I’m fine. My shoulder will probably bruise but it’s okay.”

               Jungkook helped her sit up and Catalina automatically scooted away a bit. He dropped his hands. A painfully awkward silence followed, before Jungkook spoke up.

               “Is it about the kiss?” he asked.

               “What?”

               “You’ve been kind of avoiding me ever since,” he said. “I mean, not completely ignoring me, but it’s been really awkward. And I wanted to say that I’m sorry if the kiss made you uncomfortable. I never wanted-“

               “Jungkook, it’s okay,” Catalina said with a laugh. Her mind raced to come up with something to say. She didn’t want to tell him that ever since the kiss, her heartrate speeds up every time she looks at him and she spends every waking moment wondering when he’ll kiss her again, or even mention it. So instead, she said, “Really, it’s okay. We can just forget it happened and go back to how we were. We don’t have to make a big deal about it.”

               Catalina watched with dread as his face fell. He couldn’t have been feeling the same way, could he? Did she just ruin things? Before she could think of a way to take back what she said, Jungkook stood up and held out a hand.

               “Let’s get you back up there,” he said.

               After dinner, which only the humans attended, everyone gathered in the rooms. Jungkook hadn’t attended dinner and he wasn’t in the rooms, which worried Catalina. She was already in her nightclothes, a short satin nightgown with a matching robe. She brought this on the trip with her hoping she could get somewhere with Jungkook, but messing everything up and making him avoid her was not in the plans. She needed to fix this.

               Jimin was laying in bed with a facemask on, Taehyung by his side. Their heads were together, watching Tiktoks on Jimin’s phone.

               “Do you guys know where Jungkook is?” asked Catalina.

               “He’s in the hot tub,” said Jimin. “He doesn’t want to see you though.”

               Catalina gaped at him. “Did he say that?”

               “No, but whatever you said earlier really hurt him, so, as his friend, I’m telling you he doesn’t want to see you,” Jimin said, not looking up from his phone. Catalina’s heart sank. Hurting Jungkook was the last thing she wanted to do. So, she ran from the room and began her hunt for the hot tub.

               It was an in-ground tub, partially hidden within the landscaping. The only reason Catalina spotted it was because of the steam rising from behind the snow-covered boulders. Catalina pushed open the glass sliding door and stepped outside onto the patio.

               He was sitting in the hot tub alone, his head tilted back and his eyes closed. He didn’t hear her coming, so when Catalina said, “Hey”, he startled.

               “Hey,” he said back.

               “Can we talk?” Catalina asked. He shrugged and looked away.

               “I guess.”

               Catalina sighed and sat on the edge of the tub, sticking her feet into the warm water.

               “I’m sorry for what I said earlier,” she said. “I was lying.”

               “What do you mean?” he asked.

               “I mean, I don’t want things to go back to the way they were,” said Catalina. She took a deep breath. “I was lying when I said the kiss wasn’t a big deal. It was. I couldn’t stop thinking about it ever since it happened and spent the entire time since then, even now, hoping it would happen again. And I guess I said the things I said because I didn’t think you’d feel the same way, so I wanted to just smooth things out with you-“

               “Cat, I’m the one who kissed you,” said Jungkook.

               “But it was for the mission,” said Catalina.

               “But I wouldn’t have done it if I didn’t want to,” said Jungkook. A pause, then he cracked a tiny smile. “I bought you hash browns. Did that mean nothing to you?”

               Catalina laughed and tugged her robe tighter around herself.

               “Get over here,” said Jungkook. Catalina took her robe off and slid into the water, not caring for the fate of her nightgown anymore. She waded over to him and he held out a hand, pulling her close. She had to place her knees on either side of his thighs as his arms wound around her waist.

               “Can I kiss you?” he asked. “For real this time?”

               Catalina didn’t think she could speak, so she nodded. He pulled her flush against him and kissed her hard. She was incredibly aware of how bare his chest was; she could feel every inch of it through her paper-thin nightgown. Catalina threaded her fingers into his hair as they kissed. She gave it a tug and he let out a tiny gasp into her mouth. His hands gripped her waist tighter as he tilted his head for better access. At some point, they broke apart for air, Catalina chasing his lips for one last taste.

               “Mm…so glad I didn’t listen to Jimin,” Catalina mumbled against his lips. He chuckled.

               “What?”

               “He was mad at me for making you upset and told me not to talk to you,” said Catalina.

               “Well, I’m glad you didn’t listen to him too,” Jungkook said with a grin.

               “I’m sorry,” said Catalina, running her fingers through his hair. “I never wanted to hurt you.”

               He held her tighter and said, “I know. It’s okay. It turned out fantastic, so I have no complaints.”

               Catalina giggled and let her head fall against his shoulder.

               “Yeah… no complaints at all,” she said, dropping a kiss to his neck.

[lesbian-deadpool]

The Assistant

Part One Of Two: To Kill Tony Stark

Natasha Romanoff x Reader, Platonic!Tony x Reader

Words: 2,699

Warnings: Uhhh... Cannon violence? Drinking, mentions of death, dying, and killing. Swearing. Idk. I think that’s it.

Request: For the @ryostephi who donated to the Australian Bushfires. (I’m sorry the tag doesn't work)

Summary: You’re infatuated with a red-headed newcomer. And you’re gonna kill Tony.

A/N: I’m not gonna lie. I had absolutely no idea what to do for this, so I hope this is okay. And I haven't watched IM2 in a while, so forgive me if I get anything wrong. Not proofread. I know there’s not a tone of Nat stuff in this. But there will be more in the next chapter.

(Not my GIF)

***

2011

Tony Stark’s Malliabo house.

10:36 A.M.

You were awoken from your peaceful slumber by your covers being removed from your body, robotically slow. Groaning, you grabbed the edge of your cover, that now sat at your waist. Tugging them back up your body. Fully intending to go back to sleep. That is before they were once again removed from your body, robotically slow.

Groaning louder this time, you finally peaked one of your eyes open for the first time this morning. The metal statue of Dum-E blurred, from your sleepy vision.

“What do you want, Dum-E?” you asked groggily.

“Miss Y/L/N. Mr Stark requests your assistance in his workshop,” Jarvis spoke for the robot.

“What time is it?” you yawned, cuddling into your pillow more.

“It is ten-forty, Miss,” Jarvis’ robotic voice rung throughout the room.

You groaned, “Tell Tony that if I come down there, I’m shoving a bench up his ass.”

The AI was silent for a few moments.

“He said he’s ‘looking forward to it’, Miss.”

Grumbling, you moved to sit on the edge of the bed, about to get up, when Dum-E handed you your pants.

“Oh, thank you Dum-E,” you said surprised. Before continuing with what you were previously going to say, “And what have I told you about calling me ‘Miss’?”

“Then what would you prefer I call you? Your Majesty?” Jarvis suggested.

“Jarvis,” you chided.

“Okay. Very well, Y/N. Shall I tell Mr Stark you’re on your way?”

“Yes. Thank you, Jarvis.”

“It’s a pleasure, as always, Y/N.”

***

“Right Tony, hand me a bench, and pull your pants down,” you said loudly, clapping your hands as you entered his workshop. Stopping dead in your tracks once you saw Pepper- However, it was normal for you to say this stuff in front of her, considering she had to deal with Tony. And you. Both of your antics. A lot of the times she had to deal with Tony, you and your antics together- Happy by her side- Who was also used to this shit-

The thing truly catching you off of your guard, being the gorgeous red-head woman. Standing on Pepper’s other side, holding a clipboard, with a small collection of files upon it, sat in her arm and pressed against her chest. Her dark auburn eyebrows scrunched up as she surveyed you, looking you up and down.

“-Oh, hello pretty stranger!” you greeted her, voice going an octave or two higher, that it’s usual tone.

Realising what you just said, your eyes widened, and you were quick to correct yourself. However unbelievable it may be.

“I didn't call you pretty. That never happened.”

“I’m afraid you did, Y/N,” Jarvis notified you.

“Thanks, Jarvis!”

Finally getting a hold of his stifled laughter, Tony gestured to introduce you.

“Y/N. This is Natalie Rushman, she’s Pepper’s new assistant. Natalie. This is Y/N Y/L/N, one of my best friends.”

Natalie hummed. Raising her head up at you with a small smirk. “Nice to meet you.”

“Uh. Yep.” You nodded. “I don’t want to say anything else, because I don’t want to embarrass myself more.” You smiled.

“How ever will you live this down?” Tony asked sassily.

“Give me five minutes, and I’ll be back to normal.”

“You know what? I don’t doubt that,” Pepper said.

“Hey, Y/N, guess what!” Tony clapped his hands excitedly, moving up and down on the spot.

“What?”

“Natalie kicked Happy’s ass.” Tony pointed to the girl, then gestured to blushing Happy.

“Really?” you asked Natalie, slightly surprised. Her reply being a single nod.

“No, she didn’t,” Happy blatantly lied.

“Uh, yes, she did,” Pepper assured.

“Well, no offence, Natalie,” you started, “But, anybody can kick Happy’s ass.”

She smiled at your little joke, as the Head of Security protested to your words.

At that moment, Natalie turned to Pepper.

“I should be getting back to work now, Miss Potts.”

“Yes, thank you, Natalie.”

With a nod she was off, stopping only once, by your side, turning her face towards you.

“It was really nice to meet you,” she spoke almost sultry.

“Yeah...” you breathed, “You, too.”

Watching as she walked away, the other three amused by your infatuation with the red-head, you had only just met.

Turning back to the others, surprised to see their smug faces. Like they knew something you didn’t. Or something that you would deny.

“What?”

“You love her,” Tony teased, in an almost sing-song voice.

Quickly you grabbed the nearest object upon the bench you were next to, which just so happened to be a bench. Pointing it at the man, you said, “Bend over.”

***

Apparently, the only reason Tony had requested your presence down in his workshop, was so that you could meet the new Assistant. Or as Tony liked to call her now, ‘your future Wife’. But still. He had managed to “convince” you into helping him.

You would be happy to help him, no matter what.

But that doesn’t mean you couldn’t act begrudgingly towards it. And Tony knew that.

That wasn’t the only reason.

Tony needed to tell you something. You were like his family, and he was scared.

“Y/N...” Tony started, his playful demeanour dimming, and you knew it was serious. Whatever it was he wanted to tell you, “I need to yell you something.”

“Okay...” you gently pressed, not wanting to make him close up and never tell you.

“Something. Something’s going wrong... I, umm... the reactor, it’s- I...” He sighed. Not knowing how to get the words out.

“Hey. It’s okay.” Reaching over you grabbed his forearm, squeezing it in a comforting manner. “Take your time. I’m right here.”

“Don’t tell Pepper- Or anyone really. But especially Pep. Okay?”

“I swear.”

“Well... basically... I’m dying.”

“You're what?!” you yelled, jumping to your feet.

Tony followed you, shushing you as he did.

“You’ve got to keep quiet. You swore,” he reminded you.

“But you’re dying,” you whispered softly, shocked to your core, “What-? How?”

“The shrapnel. It’s poisoning me.”

“Shit!” you swore under your breath, a hand coming up to rub at your forehead. Turning back to him you asked, “Can you fix it.”

He said nothing else, only shaking his head solemnly. Which caused your shoulder to drop.

“How long have you got?”

“Not long.”

No more words were spoken for a while after that. You were both too busy holding each other, the hug was tight with fear, afraid if you let go of him he would disappear into the air.

***

“Hey, Rhodey!” you called over to the man, clad in his airforce uniform. You had just gotten done helping Tony out with his inventions... amongst other things.

You felt a little better after Tony had explained everything, but you were still broken-hearted at the news but kept it locked and tight against your chest. Not wanting to cause the Tin Man any more pain. You knew he did felt better too. Finally getting all of that off his chest. To one person at least.

“Hey, Y/N. You seen Tones?”

“Yeah, he should be down in the workshop,” you told him, “Why? He in some trouble?”

“Isn’t he always?”

You shrugged. “Yeah, you’re right about that.”

Rhodey walked down to the workshop, he was here on business, you could tell that much. If the way he walked with a purpose told you anything.

“Can I give you a hand?” you asked, jogging up to Natalie, who had just walked through the door. She busy carrying thick binders, full of imported documents.

Before she could object. You had grabbed most of the binders out of her arms.

Natalie let out a slightly scoffed breath, as you both continued to walk, side by side, towards Natalie’s destination.

“You know I could have done it myself.”

“I know.” You nodded. She hadn’t seemed to be struggling. “But it doesn’t stop me from being chivalrous. Now, does it?”

She laughed. “Yeah. You’ve God chivalry pouring out of your ears, haven't you?”

“Yes, I do. Thank you for noticing.”

As soon as you had dropped the files off at the coffee table, where Natalie and Pepper would be busy working away. Tony walked past you -Rhodey ranting quietly beside him, so only Tony could hear-, lowly humming ‘The Wedding March’ so only you would hear.

You were, so, going to kill him yourself.

***

Tony was smirking over his glass at you, eyes shining with mischief, and that's when you knew something bad was coming.

“So. Natalie?”

She hummed, turning her attention away from the food she was cutting, and to the man, topping his glass up.

“You got a boyfriend? Girlfriend?”

You spread your arms in a ‘what-the-fuck?!’ manner, behind the red-head, Tony being the only one able to you. Face looking that of pure embarrassed shock, your willingness to murder him shining through.

“No.” She shook her head. “Nothing like that.”

“Well, if that’s the case. Maybe you’d like to go out with Y/N, sometime?”

Natalie looked over her shoulder at you.

You, however, were busy gazing up at the ceiling, like it had the most interesting story, the world has ever seen, written upon it. With your hands now on your his. But you still managed to see her lips upturn in a smirk, before her gaze returned to Tony.

“If you don’t mind, Mr Stark,” Natalie started, “I much prefer the people I date to ask me out themselves.” And with that, she took her leave.

“We’ll now you know what to need to do.”

“Kill you?” you asked, voice slightly manic with anger at the man.

“Ask her out.”

You never got the chance to vocalise your reply, because Tony took the same route Natalie did, heading back to his workshop. Leaving you in the kitchen alone with your thoughts. And desire to beat the infamous Iron Man to a pulp.

***

“I hate that guy,” you mumble, disdain on your tongue. Natalie being the only one who heard you, as she was right by your side, walking to where you were meant to watch the race.

“Hammer?” she asked curiously.

“Yep. He’s so full of himself- And not in the way Tony pretends to be.”

“Wow, you really do hate him,” she says, and you're thankful that she brushed past what you said about Tony. But hey, she works for the guy. She can probably tell that a lot of what Tony does is put on as a front so that he won't get hurt.

Sighing at her words, you nod.

“Come on.” Natalie places a hand on your arm. “The race is about to start.”

“Natalie,” Pepper calls over to he worriedly, making the red-head rush over to her, “Did you know about this?”

You turned to the TV as Natalie spoke to Pepper, seeing the missing billionaire fitted out in a race suit, and jumping into the Stark owned racecar.

“Oh, Jesus Christ!” you yelled. Running out of the room.

You were gonna kill him. You were so gonna kill him.

Or he was.

Wait.

Who the fuck is that?!

A large man, with what seemed to be a very light version of the Iron Man suit strapped upon his body. Long chains, acting like whips, yellow with electricity. Cutting up cars like they were nothing but paper.

Tony zoomed past, just as you managed to slip through the chainlink fence separating the crowd and the track. Vaulting over the metal barrier, ignoring the people calling for you to ‘stop’, and that it was ‘dangerous’. When the chain-whip-man, cut Tony’s car in half.

“Holy fuck!” You yelled.

A Rolls Royce screeched up beside you, snapping your attention from Tony rolling away from the destroyed car, to see the driver.

“Get in!” Happy ordered. And so you did. Slipping in beside Pepper. And then you were off again, to help Tony.

Soon enough, Happy had run into the man, successfully trapping him between the expensive car and the protective wall of the track. Narrowly missing Tony, who jumped up onto the chain-link fence to get away.

“Were you aiming for him, or me-?” Tony asked Happy.

“I was trying to scare him.”

“-’Cause I can’t tell.”

All the while you were trying to process everything.

“ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?!” Pepper screeched at Tony.

“You’re Head Of Security-!”

“GET IN THE CAR!” she cut him off.

And before he could voice his reply, you joined in, “Get in the fucking car, Tony!”

“-I was attacked!”

Repeating this earlier sentence to you, Happy also told Tony to get into the car. But by this point, you were so done, that you just blanked the rest of what they said. Raising a hand to your forehead, and shaking it.

That is until you heard Tony mutter, “First vacation in two years.” Then the door, he had just opened, was sliced in half, by the appearance, still alive man, trying to kill Tony.

At this point, you wished you had put on a seat belt, as Happy started ramming into the man, as Tony asked for his “suitcase”. But was unable to get it, because of Happy’s driving.

You were so done with this shit.

You had begun to reach over, to take the suitcase from Pepper try and hand into Tony easier. When the car was chopped in half, like a knife through hot butter.

“AAA! Fuck!” you yelled, whipping your arm back.

Tony was still asking for his case, as the unknown man continued to chew up the car.

Oh.

Oh, of course.

Why did you expect any less?

The fight was scary. That’s for sure. But you were just glad it was over quickly.

“God...” you uttered, “I need to sleep.”

***

“But the after-party starts now!”

““Holy shit,” you mumble, rubbing your eyes because of the man's behaviour.

“He's hammered,” Natalie spoke, sliding up next to you, “How did he get this bad? He was relatively fine fifteen minutes ago.”

You sighed.

“Yep. That’s Tony for ya.”

After that... let’s just say you lost track of things. You knew you shouldn't have, but you took a walk outside around the pool, getting some much needed fresh air, before you went back in, and tried to talk some sense into the drunk raging genius.

You understood why he was doing this. You really did. That doesn't mean you liked it, though.

When you entered not even ten minutes later, you were welcomed with destruction. People running out the door, Tony, Pepper, Natalie, and Happy nowhere to be seen. And loud crashes coming from the floors above you.

That's when you spotted Natalie and Pepper. Arguing.

What the fuck happened?

They didn’t like each other. You knew that much. But this was new for them.

Rushing over, you hoped to resolve whatever was going on between the two.

“Hey-” You hadn't even got two words out, when suddenly...

You jumped back, as Rhodey -Rhodey? When did he get here?- and Tony tore through the ceiling, landing upon the coffee table, fighting like stupid children. Noticing Natalie taking up a fighting stance in front of you, as Pepper screams.

“Boys!” you yelled. Failing to gain their attention, as they instead of hearing you, and stopping their fighting, decided to crash through walls, knocking the hell out of each other and their metal suits.

This was all too much for you.

So, you did what you did best.

As Pepper ran off towards the fighting “adult men”, and Natalie... going wherever she did.

You left.

You walked out the door and got into your car.

They could handle this themselves. You still had that much faith in them.

But right now. You had something else you needed to do.

***

The bell above the diner’s door rang, alerting the three conversing people to the newcomer.

Surprising to only two of them.

Tony and Natasha’s mouths dropped agape, at what they saw.

You.

Walking straight towards them. SHIELD uniform clasped around your body, the sleeves rolled up, showing your forearms.

Stopping by the table, you slid in, next to Tony. Staring straight into Natasha's green eyes, as the billionaire beside you screeched, “What the fuck?!”

[dragimal]

now that s5 is over and I’m starting to wind down from the high of the finale, I think I can finally grasp *exactly* why I have mixed feelings on s5. to be clear, I absolutely ADORE TMA as a whole, and still consider it one of the best pieces of horror media I’ve consumed. but s5 left me feeling... not bad, but off, even when there’s plenty I still rly like abt s5

it mainly comes down to 2 things for me: 1) the severe tone shift, and 2) Martin being Fucking Weird for a lot of the season

a lot of ppl have talked abt how s5 just wasn’t as scary as the previous seasons for various reasons. one kinda inevitable reason was simply that a lot of the mystery of the horror had been revealed at that point, and a monster is never as scary once you can see it clearly. but I think the bigger reason is that the format shifted from horror anthology to.... sociology anthology. like, every statement of s5 felt like a sociology paper on fear and systemic abuse, rather than something meant to chill the reader

this isn’t necessarily a bad thing, honestly-- like I said, much of the mystery had been revealed, so I think it was an understandable move to try to shift the narrative somehow. also, I love sociology papers! I think they’re interesting to read, and s5 gave us some rly creative frameworks for some of them (the poetic carousel, Oliver’s professional assessment, Jared’s garden--)

however, I do think the tone shift was still a bit jarring, esp considering what the audience was used to up to that point. perhaps that’s an appropriate move, to match a plot point as game-changing as the literal apocalypse. BUT that doesn’t mean the tone shift still wasn’t a bit of a let-down, in terms of horror and tension

like, yeah a lot of the mystery was gone, but Hill Top Road ended up being the big mystery of s5... and we weren’t even fully aware of it til almost the end of the season? sure, there was plenty of fan speculation, but we were also considering SO many other possibilities, Hill Top was never rly a core theory until VERY late in the game. like, the mystery seemed to take a backseat to the sociology papers, if that makes sense, lmao

literally the ONE episode to give me chills down my spine like the good ol’ days pre-s5 was MAG196: This Old House. Annabelle vaguely threatening Martin, and ending on, “You have no idea who’s listening, do you?” fucking SUPERB, I was absolutely DELIGHTED by the possibilities of that one line! like, what did it mean? were we gonna go full meta??

but the last few eps after that were... frankly kind of a letdown from that spike of tension? I think those last eps are what rly cinched this idea for me-- that s5 was literally like reading a sociology paper. it rly all was just, arguing about the possibilities, considering the consequences, and making decisions. which, again, isn’t necessarily bad, but it’s not horror-- it’s a thought exercise with an apocalyptic garnish

EDIT-- I forgot to say, I think this is part of why MAG200 simply didn’t hit me the same way it hit others. it was intellectually satisfying-- it tied up loose ends, closed character arcs/relationships, left some delicious ambiguity-- but not emotionally cathartic, if that makes sense? like, I was expecting to cry, but I didn’t even rly get teary? I was grinning and delighted by all the satisfying conclusions, but I didn’t feel that emotional RELEASE that I was expecting and hoping for

as for jonmartin, I want to be clear here. I am NOT one of those ppl that thinks jonmartin came out of nowhere in s4-- I think the buildup pre-s5 was excellent, and their finally being together at the end of s4 was so so earned and rewarding. I’m also NOT one of those ppl that thinks arguments = abuse. I think when I briefly criticized jonmartin in s5 in the past, ppl got this impression that like, I think that jonmartin miscommunicating and having bad coping mechanisms... means that they’re bad for each other and abusing each other? and that’s just not the case?? 

I admit that my initial response to some of the jonmartin weirdness may have been a bit harsh, but even at the time I still loved jonmartin and was simply looking at their relationship with a critical but loving lens

what I have a problem with is that Martin pulls just as much bullshit as Jon in s5, and NEVER gets called out for it

this post I made a while back gets more into the details that bother me, but essentially, there’s always been this rly uneven “accountability scale” (idk what else to call it) for Jon vs. a lot of other characters-- in that, Jon always gets called out for his bullshit, while a lot of other characters don’t. now a lot of this is perfectly explainable as Jon being the main character, so we simply see his fuck-ups AND the subsequent consequences more often than any other character. and there are plenty of characters that I absolutely do NOT blame for going a bit overboard (I give Melanie and Tim in particular a ton of leeway here, given their respective situations. they more or less have full rights to bully Jon imo)

but, the problem is, there are also a LOT of moments where other characters say something absolutely horrific to Jon (namely Basira and Georgie in s4), like imply that he’s responsible for problems he had absolutely no control over, or fucking blame him for literally being groomed into an Archivist by people/powers he couldn’t even grasp... and those accusations are just left to sit and fester in Jon, completely uncontested

the nice thing abt s5 is that most of this is addressed-- like Basira’s completely unfair double-standards for “monsters”, and Georgie unknowingly blaming Jon for his trauma, etc.-- in very satisfying ways.

.... except for Martin.

without rehashing that linked post too much, Martin’s main problem in s5 is that his go-to response to trauma is denial. he denies the fact that he wants to kill avatars for his own satisfaction (which is a completely reasonable desire on its own tbqh!), and instead continues to lie to himself (for quite a long time) that killing avatars is actually helping anyone but Jon and Martin. he denies that Jon’s become a real full-fledged “monster”, and refuses to acknowledge all the baggage that comes with that

this denial unintentionally projects a lot of rly fucked-up messages at Jon, like: Jon is now a freaky horrorshow (even when he’s doing something completely innocuous, like talking casually about his powers); Jon’s fears over losing his autonomy/identity to the Eye, and his fears over his proven abilities to hurt others, are invalid; monsters inherently deserve to die, despite Jon technically being one; Jon not being able to use his powers “well enough” is some failure on his part

now, none of this is to say Martin’s characterization on its own is a bad thing-- I actually think it could’ve been interesting! it’s a perfectly reasonable trauma response, it tracks for Martin’s character pre-s5, and could have been a rly interesting perspective to explore.... if it was ever actually challenged by the narrative or other characters

I think the closest we got was Martin’s conversation with himself in his own domain, when his double calls him out for fantasizing a happy ending where Jonah is dead and Jon and Martin kiss (OUGH.... JONNY YOU HURT ME..), but that still never rly addresses the hurt that Martin’s denial causes Jon

and god, I was rly holding out-- Martin seemed to chill out on the denial a lot after the first third of the season, and I was hoping it might go a similar route as Basira, where it would just take a while to rly address Martin’s issues. but then Jon and Martin have their argument in MAG194, and I was fully on Martin’s side of it, UNTIL he said, “You weren’t meant to enjoy it this much!” (in reference to Jon killing avatars), and when Jon calls him out, Martin just brushes over it! 

BOY when I tell you I went BALLISTIC.... FUCK YOU Martin, YOU’RE the one that went all Kill Bill and PUSHED Jon to feel the same way!! JESUS. like I get that that wasn’t the core of the argument there, but oh my god that one bit...

and once again, to make myself perfectly fucking crystal clear here, this is coming from someone who relates heavily to both Jon and Martin. I can see exactly where Martin is coming from for many of his decisions, and the trauma that’s led him to mentally protect himself like this. so it only makes me more frustrated to see him refuse to face his own issues, while still (understandably) expecting Jon to face his issues. yes, Jon pulls a LOT of bullshit in s5 that he deserves to be called out for (and called out he is!), but accountability goes both ways, Martin! you can’t demand responsible behavior from others if you’re not willing to extend the same courtesy!

[amjustagirl]

Omg that quiz is so accurate and that’s so scary. ‘Your stories will make your reader lose themselves in another universe, and when they come back, something will be changed forever.’

Nikki, your writing has made me feel so many emotions whilst I’m reading your work. I followed you after I saw someone recommend storm chaser but I didn’t have time to start reading yet. And once I did get that time to read? I’ve pretty much read all your work (I have yet to read the oikawa angst because I won’t be able to deal with it and need to read hogwarts au as well), one after the other and at that time, I think you had just posted the last chapter of storm chaser I believe. There were a couple occasions when I got a bit sad (or I had to function as a human being aka work) so I took breaks to refocus because I get quite emotional. Your stand alone suga fic had me hooked, it’s the most different from the others. Idk why but that one just feels special? Like I just felt so fuzzy and warm and I’ve been meaning to reread it because I want to talk about it. I plan to reread all your work because I want to talk about how you pulled at my heartstrings at the right time or made me cry or made me so excited and giddy when something good happened.

Your characterisations and storylines are captivating. I haven’t felt like this with a physical book in a long time. I can defo see all your effort and soul in all your writing and that includes the small blurbs you do as well. Idk what I came to say but I hope the one thing that does come across to you is that you are my favourite writer and you have fully captivated my heart with your stories and I’ve shed quite a few tears whilst reading.

im going to be honest with you - i took my time to answer this ask because gosh if it isn't one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me as a writer? like. you appreciate my works? you reread them? you've cried over them? i'm your favourite author?

*cries*

i think that's what i've always wanted to achieve with my writing. by writing something real and raw that will transport my readers into a whole world of pain and passion and love in the hopes that they'll remember the themes and lessons and thoughts i've weaved into my fics when they return. i definitely put my soul into my works - this is ironic as a writer but i don't know how to explain it, there's a certain vulnerability you have to accept as a writer when you publish your works, and now i'm realising it because each and everyone of those fics has a little part of me.

sky of the sky (my suga fic) is the very first fic i wrote. perhaps it's special because of the amount of characterisation i put into the reader (she's the only one that actly has a name) but it's also about growing up and learning to love and yeah...it has a really special place in my heart and i... can't thank you enough for giving it a chance because i know its one of my least popular works. i think i spent a lot of time of the fic - structuring the fic through the seasons, figuring out how each scene plays in the development of their relationship - and yeah. it's a sentimental favourite of mine. thank you thank you thank you for giving it a chance.

haha icarus (my oikawa fic) im not gonna lie - it's definitely painful, it's definitely angsty but i think...the themes might resonate with you - esp if you're an older reader / writer like myself. about love lost and love gained, deciding whether to fall or fly or stay away from pain. if you do give it a chance - let me know what you think!

anw look if you ever want to chat, my inbox / dms are always always open. thank YOU again for making my day, nay, my week with your lovely thoughts and kind words. i can't express how much i truly, truly appreciate it, from the bottom of my heart.

[gayoperatorgunclub]

For the ultimate ship meme, Lion and Doc? I'm sorry, I'm LionDoc trash-

it’s all good!! whenever someone sends in an ask, i get an excuse to talk/write about one of my interests! really, it makes me so happy to be able to create content that people hopefully enjoy!! 💝💝💝

General:

Rate the Ship -   Awful | Ew | No pics pls | I’m not comfortable | Alright | I like it! | Got Pics? | Let’s do it! | Why is this not getting more attention?! | The OTP to rule all other OTPs

How long will they last? - until the end of time, babey

How quickly did/will they fall in love? - it was love at first sight but then they started talking i do think it was some form of ~interest~ in one another at first sight, but then all that drama and lack of communication happened so they didn’t really allow themselves to even dream about the possibility of a relationship. HOWEVER! once lion joined rainbow and they talked their shit out like people who know how to cope, there was a period of a few months that is now referred to as The Four Months of Pining™, during which glaz did a lot of paintings where the subject (who usually bears an uncanny resemblance to doc or lion) is staring at something (or someone) longingly. he calls it his french period. when they finally get together, a LOT of money changes hands. and goes straight into sledge’s pocket (he was the only one who bet that it would take them this long). diana gets a brand new collar (handmade), bed (handmade), dish (handmade), and many new toys (some handmade, some store-bought. sledge’s craftsmanship can only get him so far) 

How was their first kiss? - you know how the french are supposed to be super suave and confident??? and how gay people are trying their hardest but they’re just Not Good at things????? (i know these are stereotypes but stay with me). well, with their 5/8 french blood (i hc one of doc’s parents is fully algerian while the other is half french, half algerian), and their 4/4 gay blood, they have an 81.25% chance of success in matters of the heart. sadly, that 18.75% chance of failure came into play during this situation. picture it. doc and lion. romantic, home-cooked dinner. le festin is playing in the background. they’re holding hands over the table. suddenly, doc’s cat goes into labour. all hell breaks loose. lion is getting flashbacks to his son’s birth, so now he’s hyperventilating. doc carries him to the couch and turns on the fan so he can cool off and catch his breath, before carefully moving his cat, Rayie (arabic for gorgeous, pronounced rye-ah) to the living room in his handmade Birthing Box, then grabs a pile of blankets and a heat lamp and situates himself on the ground nearby so he can help her if she needs it. once the kittens are born (they’re twins!! Sadiqi is the boy, and Amirti is the girl!!!) doc makes sure they’re nice and warm and that Rayie is recovering, and gives her pets while she cleans her babies. once the happy family is all settled in for the night, doc walks over to the couch and just. lays down on top of lion. once he’s gotten over the adrenaline of the birth, he takes lion’s face in his hands and says “promise me you’ll be more calm if we ever decide to have kids” and gives him a BIG smooch while lion’s just short-circuiting like “does he know i have a son???? did i forget to mention my son?????? also what about these kittens??? are they not sufficiently childish to count as children????? DOES HE WANT KIDS????? does he want to marry me??????? wait why is he getting so clo-”

Wedding:

Who proposed? - lion. it was the day of their two year anniversary (yes i AM saying they got together the august after outbreak don’t @ me) and they were on vacation at doc’s family’s Secret Beach House. they were vibing on the balcony, watching the sunset, when lion suddenly clears his throat. doc turns to look at him and finds his boyfriend down on one knee, looking like he might flee to Bermuda. he’s reaching for something in his pocket. doc starts laughing. lion, completely misunderstanding his reaction, flushes and stammers out an apology. doc sees this, and immediately stops, though he’s still smiling gleefully as he catches lion by the biceps, then reaches into his own pocket and pulls the ring he was going to give olivier. they exchange rings, giggling like little kids, and spend the rest of the night making out on whatever surfaces are available. 

Who is the best man/men? - for lion? montagne. (his son is the ring bearer and doc’s niece is the flower girl). for doc? rook. he’s so happy he gets to participate in his dad’s wedding

Who is the bride’s maid(s)? - for lion: finka. for doc: twitch

Who did the most planning? - both of them!! do you know how hard they worked to ensure the ceremony was valid in the eyes of both of their religions

Who stressed the most? - s e e  a b o v e

How fancy was the ceremony? - Back of a pickup truck | 2 | 3 | 4 | Normal Church Wedding | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Kate and William wish they were this big.

Who was specifically not invited to the wedding? - lion’s parents. they tried to call him during the reception but doc’s grandma grabbed his phone and started cussing them out, talking about dishonor and how they tried to disown him so they’re not his parents anymore, and besides, his new family absolutely adores him, so really, it’s their loss. once she hangs up, she pulls lion into a hug and he calls her his favorite, if only, grand-mère

Sex:

Who is on top? - who’s topping? lion. but sometimes doc gets bitchy so he gets to set the pace if you know what i mean

Who is the one to instigate things? - they are both lowkey horny 24/7 so 👀👀👀

How healthy is their sex life? - Barely touch themselves let alone each other | 2 | 3 | 4 | Once a couple weeks, nothing overboard | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They are humping each other on the couch right now (only because they do get to see each other fairly often. if one goes on a long mission without the other, once they get back they will bump it up to a 10 real quick)

How kinky are they? - Straight missionary with the lights off | 2 | 3 | 4 | Might try some butt stuff and toys | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Don’t go into the sex dungeon without a horse’s head

How long do they normally last? - idk long enough ig. maybe longer if someone feels they’ve been left ~unsatisfied~ they might go a few more rounds ;))

Do they make sure each person gets an equal amount of orgasms? - ok it depends on what they’re doing but usually it’s one or two each, but on ~special~ occasions it’s either doc getting edged and denied for hours, OR doc getting forced to come over and over again until he’s begging for something, whether it be more or a goddamn break even he isn’t really sure. either way he’s crying and lion is consistently asking if he needs to safeword and otherwise checking in because they may like it rough but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t care

How rough are they in bed? - Softer than a butterfly on the back of a bunny | 2 | 3 | 4 | The bed’s shaking and squeaking every time | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Their dirty talk is so vulgar it’d make Dwayne Johnson blush. Also, the wall’s so weak it could collapse the next time they do it.

How much cuddling/snuggling do they do? - No touching after sex | 2 | 3 | 4 | A little spooning at night, or on the couch, but not in public | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They snuggle and kiss more often than a teen couple on their fifth date to a pillow factory.

Children:

How many children will they have naturally? - unless someone’s hormones and organs get fucked, zero

How many children will they adopt? - probably none?? idk they’ve already got lion’s son and they’re both busy enough with work so

Who gets stuck with the most diapers? - NEITHER!!!!! DISGUSTANG!!!!!!!!!

Who is the stricter parent? - god i wanna say both. like lion and his attachment to rules??? but doc and his Mom Friend energy????? but ig lion BUT HE’S NOT STRICT TO THE POINT HE’S A BUZZKILL OR ANYTHING HE’S JUST RESPONSIBLE (he will NOT allow his husband and son to go vandalize the property of some islamaphobic brits, as much as he agrees with the sentiment) 

Who stops the kid(s) from doing dangerous stunts after school? - doc will only allow vandalism if it’s in the name of righteousness. meaning, he’ll allow their son to spray paint the walls of a goddamn walmart with shit like “eat the rich” and a portrait of robespierre and a guillotine, but it is a HARD NO on defacing places like the library or community center (unless he has a good reason to do so). lion spends his time praying and making sure his son knows which acts of civil disobedience are acceptable and which are distorting their goal 

Who remembers to pack the lunch(es)? - doc. he (privately) dreams of retiring (eventually) and living out his lifelong dreams of being a househusband. so

Who is the more loved parent? - SHUT THE FUCK UP RIGHT NOW GET OUT OF MY HOUSE IM GONNA BEAT YOUR ASS. but ig lion??? BUT ONLY BECAUSE THEIR SON HAS KNOWN HIM LONGER. doc is half Dad and half Cool Uncle Who Gives Me Spray Paint And Tells Me To Make Myself Heard (to clarify, i know doc is a pacifist, but im kinda projecting my own sentiment of “we’ve tried to be peaceful but you wouldn’t give us the time of day. now that we’ve “acted out” we’ve gotten your attention, and rest assured, things are going to change.” he won’t hurt anybody, he’s just tired of having to be everyone’s “muslim friend” and educating people on things they could google themselves)

Who is more likely to attend the PTA meetings? - it used to be lion out of necessity, but when people started asking about his “wife” he was really torn between telling them that he and his son’s mother separated, but now he has a partner and his son seems very happy about it. when doc finally attends a meeting with lion, people really struggle to hide their shock. a few clunky but well-meaning “we support you”’s and “we’re sorry for everything that’s been going on”’s later, doc has used his charm to make friends with literally everyone. from then on, he is on pta duty on behalf of lion and his ex

Who cried the most at graduation? - lion! his parents purposefully didn’t show at his, so it’s a big deal for him to show his son just how proud he is. doc tears up a little too, but manages to mostly keep it together so he can support lion, who spends most of the day heave-crying about how proud he is into his husband’s shoulder. gustave just pats him on the back and tells him that they’ll run out of donuts if they don’t get to the concession stand soon

Who is more likely to bail the child(ren) out of trouble with the law? - doc. civil disobedience, baby!! he has never been caught. lion fears the law after his youth, so he tries to avoid any visits to law enforcement. he also can’t stand to see his son behind bars

Cooking:

Who does the most cooking? - doc. househusband, remember?

Who is the most picky in their food choice? - doc, but only because he can be a bit of a spice supremacist. he has to get his ingredients from these very specific farms and markets or else his great grandmother will begin manifesting in their house to curse them

Who does the grocery shopping? - doc, bc he does NOT trust lion to not just sweep all of the microwave ramen and kraft mac n cheese into the cart then sprint to self-checkout

How often do they bake desserts? - whenever possible. doc and maestro live by the philosophy “don’t do anything halfway” if they’re going to go through the trouble of making a meal, it will have multiple courses. 

Are they more of a meat lover or a salad eater? - doc is more of a salad eater but only for ease of consumption with halal laws. he adores filet mignon

Who is more likely to surprise the other(s) with an anniversary dinner? - lion! maestro enlists himself as assistant head chef after walking into the base’s kitchen one day to find lion covered in flour and lying facedown on the floor, crying

Who is more likely to suggest going out? - also lion! though he’s memorized doc’s order at all of their favorite restaurants, so he usually just gets take out and puts on a big show of being a “tired housewife who works in the kitchen all day just for this one meal” and setting up the table so it’s all nice and romantic

Who is more likely to burn the house down accidently while cooking? - lion. he tried crème brûlée once. never again 

Chores:

Who cleans the room? - lion. organization is everything to this man. doc helps with laundry and such, but for the most part he leaves organization to lion and his systems (think leslie knope levels of planning and organization)

Who is really against chores? - neither! they both understand that teamwork makes the dream work, baby!!

Who cleans up after the pets? - doc, since lion’s already asked him which color hanger should represent “clothes i can tear off my husband before we fuck” and he needs a Moment

Who is more likely to sweep everything under the rug? - neither. they don’t own a broom

Who stresses the most when guests are coming over? - lion because of the deep-seated catholic urge to appear perfect in front of others, and doc because people will gossip, olivier!

Who found a dollar between the couch cushions while cleaning? - lion. he immediately called doc into the room and asked “is this your stash of drug money?” doc, who had been asleep because it was 3 in the morning on a saturday, just stares at him

Misc:

Who takes the longer showers/baths? - it is so bold to assume they don’t shower together to “cut costs”

Who takes the dog out for a walk? - lion is known in their neighborhood as the man who walks cats. there is a facebook page where people post pictures of him walking his cats. vigil is an admin

How often do they decorate the room/house for the holidays? - LITERALLY EVERY HOLIDAY GETS DECORATIONS. lion makes his own for the muslim holidays since there really aren’t many “of good quality” in stores. when they first started dating, doc came home to find his house covered in ramadan decorations, and lion standing precariously on a ladder, trying to string up fairy lights while learning how to pronounce important arabic words. needless to say, doc cries

What are their goals for the relationship? - mutual joy and contentment!!!! 

Who is most likely to sleep till noon? - doc. he’s sleepy

Who plays the most pranks? - lion, but they’re stupid ones like replacing certain pictures with danny devito. doc gets back at him by replacing pictures of jesus with ewan mcgregor, and putting yoda into his nativity scene. lion doesn’t notice