#idk i wish i had more energy rn but i do not. im really hoping i work this out like i figure i will but i would like to not be stressed

[rodrickheffley]

this creative writing assignment is killing me i havent done any fiction writing in so long bc of shame so. tough

[i-love-ptv]

Please Don’t Think I’m Insecure ₊ ⊹.𖥔 ݁ ˖

Pairing: Rafe Cameron x Fem!Reader

You navigate your relationship with Rafe, but you can never escape that green-eyed monster.

Wc: 2,100

Angst, bit of comfort at the end?

An: First, sorry to the brunette girls, but im kinda projecting rn. BUT YAYYYY I WROTE ABOUT RAFE FOR THE FIRST TIME! I randomly got a burst of writing energy while listening to ethel cain (this has nothing to do w any of her songs, at least not purposefully if it somehow relates idk)

Feedback ALWAYS appreciated my loves!! xxx

You couldn’t help but feel envious of the brunette girls of the Outer Banks.

You found that they carry a different type of beauty, one that you couldn’t compare to.

Every time you glance and see your darling boyfriend, Rafe, being hounded by these girls, you swear you feel a piece of your soul being ripped from your body.

You and Rafe’s relationship wasn’t always smooth sailing. In fact, the two of you had broken up before, when he chose his drugs over you.

Every party, you’d see him snort lines, roll his blunts, and nearly drown himself in all sorts of liquor.

It killed you to leave him, but you remembered exactly why you decided to put the ultimatum on the table when he called you a “controlling, insecure bitch.”

You had never packed your bags faster.

You would stalk Topper and Kelce on instagram for months, just so you could search every background of every photo for the boy you were in love with.

You occasionally saw Rafe around the island, sometimes you’d stare a second too long, and he’d catch your wandering eyes. You never held eye contact, so you never saw how he’d frown at you. He wished he could read your mind, just to see if you think about him, like how he thinks about you.

You briefly remembered looking at your bedside table clock, after being abruptly awoken by thunks, on your window.

It was 2:33 in the morning.

At first, you ignored it, thinking it was just the rain picking up. But the thunk, thunk, thunk only continued, getting harder each time.

You slowly approached your window, knowing that if needed, you could easily run to your dad, and have him pull out his gun to deal with whatever was plaguing your slumber.

You quickly yanked your curtains open and slid the creaky window open. You really needed to have your parents deal with that.

You immediately looked down and saw none other than Rafe Cameron himself.

He was soaked to the bone, crouching in the grass, you assumed he was looking for more things to throw.

“Rafe..?” You whisper-shouted down at him.

He looked up at you like a deer in headlights, this allowed you to notice his blistering red face, and his semi-glossy eyes.

This was the first time that you saw his freshly buzzed hair in person, rather than from a distance.

You would’ve been lying if you said he didn’t look devilishly handsome.

“Jeez peach….You really are a heavy sleeper.” Rafe said with a watery chuckle, trying to lighten the mood.

He hoped you didn’t notice the sadness in his voice, and if you did he at least hoped you wouldn’t mention it.

“God, Rafe, why didn’t you just come to the front door like a normal person.” You sighed, and with that, you closed the window and curtains.

Rafe’s eyes widened, his breath picked up, and he felt his stomach drop.

He rubbed at his eyes angrily, wiping away his salty tears.

He was too busy in his head, going over how ‘stupid and idiotic’ he felt for thinking you’d even consider taking him back after what he put you through a year prior, to notice you walking up to him.

“Rafe…Hun, please come inside…You’re going to get sick at this rate.” You muttered, rubbing your hand on his shoulder to provide an ounce of comfort.

You heard him gasp softly, but he refused to look into your eyes, that makes you frown.

You were outside in the pouring rain, in a robe and slippers, coaxing him into your house, and he couldn't even look you in the eyes?

You knew it wasn't right to feel this way, you thought it was that grudge that you held for what he did to you deep down.

Your mind was reeling, thoughts flying around like a flock of birds in the wind.

You didn’t know how to feel, seeing your ex-boyfriend, who hurt you so badly, outside of your house with tears in his eyes.

His tears.

His tears make you think of all the times he’d come over to your house, after seeking solace away from his father, who’d decided to pick another argument with the boy.

He would lay his head in your lap as you played with his long, silky brown strands of hair.

You would wipe his tears every single time he needed you.

It was always you who was there for him.

It was always you who’d understood him the most out of anyone on the damn island, hell, out of anyone on the entire planet.

You couldn’t help but think about all the times he’d lash out on you, while you’re going to retrieve a towel for him, and a fresh pair of his old clothes from your drawer. You had never given them back, you wanted a piece of your old, sweet Rafe, since it felt like that part of him had vanished.

You came back and saw him standing idly near the front door, lingering, you could tell he was too nervous to sit without permission, not wanting to overstep.

You hand him the clothes, he immediately recognizes his old ‘Kildare Athletics’ shirt, but of course, he decides not to mention it.

He had begun to strip in front of you, you quickly turned around, muttering a “Jesus Christ…” to yourself.

You heard rustling, then eventually heard a soft, “Done” escape from Rafe’s cracked lips.

You sat him on the couch, while you put his wet clothes in the bathroom; that was a task to deal with another day.

You couldn’t bring yourself to sit next to him, not trusting your sleepy judgment to keep you from babying him like you want to, like you used to.

You broke the silence by whispering, “Why are you here, Rafe? It’s so late…”

“God, it’s so weird to hear you call me by my name, normally it was always “baby,” or “puddin’.”

“Please Rafe, I’m not in the mood.” You exclaimed softly, your resolve slowly breaking down.

Rafe toyed with the gold signet ring on his finger, deciding what to say.

“I miss you peach…nothing’s the same without you. And I know..Before you say anything, I know I fucked up. I think about that everyday. I have since that day…” He paused, trying to find his words.

You looked at him, your eyes beckoning him to continue.

He noticed a glint in your eye, almost looking like hope, and it made him break down.

“I didn’t think I’d get this far..Uhm, give me a second please..” He was embarrassed, you could tell.

“I don’t get it Rafe, I thought you loved me…How could you do that to us..?” You choked on your words, feeling the tears start to build.

Rafe shot up at this, “I do!” He exclaimed, immediately regretting it when he remembered that your parents were just upstairs.

Your cat, Daphne, crawled into his lap, being startled awake by his yell.

He scratched behind her ears and continued, “Of course I do. I always did. I know I didn’t make it obvious, and I barely showed it, but I promise I did. Seeing you walk out that door made me realize just how much I love you.”

“I still don’t understand…” You murmur as you pick at the sleeve of your fluffy, cloud-like robe.

“I….I got scared, baby. Things between us were getting so..Real, I guess. I found myself thinking about you every second of the day, wondering where you were, thinking about who you were with, if that idiot JJ was still flirting with you like he used to..” Rafe gulps.

“I’ve never felt like this about anyone, so when it kept growing, I panicked, and ran. I turned to coke, and booze to try and gather myself. I felt pathetic, knowing that my day revolved on how yours went.”

Rafe’s shoulders shook, and you grabbed his hand, you intertwined your fingers with his, gripping him tightly.

That night, you told Rafe how you felt, then, and when the two of you were together. The conversation was hard on both of you, but by the time the sun was about to rise, you decided to give him another chance. Telling him how you wanted to take it slow at first, to make sure that you wouldn’t get hurt again.

Rafe flinched at this, feeling disgusted, knowing that he had made you build your walls up again.

Which brings you to today, you had gone off to find a water bottle somewhere in the crowded house.

When you finally were able to locate a few, and you walked back outside.

That’s when you saw it.

Rafe was talking to her.

Sofia.

It was no surprise to everyone that the two had dated months prior to you and Rafe getting back together.

They were the talk of the island, of course you had heard.

But they weren’t together anymore, Rafe came back to you.

So why do you still feel those anxious butterflies in your stomach? They feel like moths, flying around recklessly inside you.

You feel like you’re on the brink of vomiting.

A part of you wondered if he still wanted her,

If he got back together with you, then there was a possibility of him wanting to get back together with another one of his exes.

You want to confront the problem head-on, really! But the thought of doing so makes your legs feel like jelly in your flip-flops.

You turn around, quickly walking back inside the crowded house, searching every corner for a place to find a moment of quiet.

After hearing three different couples doing things they probably shouldn’t in a bedroom that wasn’t theirs, you found a small hall closet.

It felt weird, sitting in a somewhat cramped closet, begging for everyone and everything to just go away.

You’re sitting in the dark when you see a flash that lights up the closet: it’s your phone.

You look at it, the blaring sight of a text from ‘My Baby! 💞’.

You ponder for a moment, then decide to ignore it.

You hate feeling like this, feeling like you can be so easily replaced by someone you know is prettier than you.

Sofia was perfect; she was loved by all of the older folk at the country club. She carried herself with nothing but confidence. You wish you could feel the same.

Suddenly, your shorts start to feel like they’re two sizes too small, and your shirt shrinks by the second.

You wanted to be perfect.

Why couldn’t you be perfect?

Did you want it for yourself? Or do you want it for Rafe.

Your thoughts are interrupted when you hear shouts throughout the hallway.

You glance at your phone and notice that over half an hour has gone by.

“Peach?! Peach, baby, where are you?!” You hear, and you feel yourself cower deeper into the closet.

The last thing you want is for Rafe to find you in here, crying like a little girl, wishing to be perfect for just a moment.

You hear the string of curses getting closer and closer to you.

You try to conceal your hiccups, by holding your hand over your mouth.

This makes it worse, you can’t catch your breath, but you don’t remove your hand.

Your head is pounding. Your chest hurts.

You quickly start sobbing, just wanting to disappear.

Without warning, the closet door is yanked open.

There you see your boyfriend Rafe, looking slightly out of breath, almost as if he was urgently trying to find you.

Light fills the room, and his arms quickly wrap around your frame.

You grip onto him harshly, trying to focus on the smell of his rich cologne against his skin.

Rafe pulls away slightly, looking at you with worried eyes that scan your frame.

“I’ve been looking all over for you, peach! Where have you been?! What’s going on?!” Rafe babbled.

You try to answer him, but only a pathetic squeak leaves your throat. You sob harder at this.

Rafe knows that it’ll be impossible to try and get anything out of you while you’re in this state.

So he continues to hold you, rubbing circles up and down your back. Soft hushes leave his lips as he tries to help you regain your breath.

Rafe knows he wasn’t a good boyfriend in the past, and it was always you who’d be there for him.

Now it was his turn to be here, for you.

sorry if the ending is rushed cuties, I couldn’t think of anything else and i wanted to get smth out for y’all😭

[disney-rapunzel-merida-vanellope]

Random rambling thoughts on ✨WISH✨ before the movie comes out

- This movie is for the sleeping beauty girlies… or at least IT HAS TO BE. Any other vibe and I’m gonna be extremely disappointed. It’s already giving medieval European fairytale with gorgeous animation so they can’t fumble this bag. I’m not really sure yet what I expect from the plot but I just need a sleeping beauty energy to it idk idk. I don’t really know what I mean by it cause sleeping beauty is so contradictory in itself, it’s so epic but also so quiet and calm and simple… we’ll see

- This movie is gonna comment on astrology and the horoscope right right??? You cannot do a movie about wishes and stars and not give us a peak into the starry night the characters look upon to and study! If I don’t have a scene of asha discussing constellations then what’s the point 😒 but like even just the aesthetics in the background or something. I need it

- I know everyone knows this movie is set in Spain but the official sources say Iberian peninsula and u bet your ass that, as a portuguese gal, imma remind y’all about it cause we get so little representation while the Spanish get everything well now they’ll have to share 😭😭😭😭😭

- Asha having friends is so anti Disney princess of her 😭😭😭 those other girls only talk to animals. Tiana and Pocahontas are the only girls with a bff and that’s only 1, Asha has 7 😭😭😭 I’m not very impressed with their designs but I guess they can grow on me

- I’m guessing the movie is entirely in the kingdom and it’s nearby places like tangled and sleeping beauty, as opposed to movies like moana or frozen that force them out of their home in a long journey

- Do u guys think the Easter eggs will be subtle or Ralph breaks the internet kind of in your face? Cause disney is making a lot of promises, dozens of Easter eggs right? But I think the in your face crossover will be just for the once upon a studio short, and in the movie the cameos will be more Easter eggs and subtle. (Out of topic but have y’all seen that Lego trailer for the Disney princesses vs Gaston thing? I’m telling y’all rn, disney in gonna give up an official disney animation studios movie of the princesses all together in an adventure before 2040!! IM JUST SAYING!)

- I hope the musical numbers take notes from encanto in the dynamism of we don’t talk about Bruno and dreamlike sequences from surface pressure. I just don’t love when characters are forced to be stuck in reality, it feels very limited. Animation is supposed to break those restrictions. And like, not every musical number has to be like this, but I just want more than a character singing in point A, B and C u know? And I like how, for example, a character would start singing the song and then the 2nd half is a montage? Or like in when will my life begin where she starts singing, but then it’s all montage and she just sings again at the end. (Uncharted waters was a very good song with a very boring scene let’s be honest, and something like that is criminal but it would be even worse in animation)

- I’m really not sure what to expect from the plot and I haven’t really thought a]much about it but rn, if I had to guess, I’d say the movie is about a kingdom that parallels present day USA kkkk hear me out!!! The kingdom had low days of war but fought for independence and began from scratch. This family has magic and can grant people’s wishes and promises the people the equivalent of the American dream. But as generations pass, the king starts collecting more and more wishes without ever intending to grant them to the people or maybe the price of the wishes keeps getting higher. The "American" dream doesn’t exist anymore but people still believe in it cause they are powerless but hopefull. Basically the movie is gonna be about dethroning a tyrant and dismantling capitalism 😃 (look I’m not good with words or brain power but I think u understand what I mean). Maybe the king’s magic is fake, he just knows how to work with the stars own magic while no one else can. And in the end, Asha and her friends are gonna Robin Hood their way into granting the peoples wishes or just make then see that wishing only goes so far as you’re willing to work for your dream??… but like I’m serious, I really think this movie is gonna be a shade to America and is gonna go against everything bob iger represents

[rianafying]

i’m having a really bad day emotionally. idk if it’s my period hormones or bpd but i’m just in a really sucky mood today. yesterday i recovered from one illness that i had since late jan. i’ve been desperately waiting to feel better and this morning i woke up with another kind of illness. and i’m doing my best to recover from this as well. and something triggered my abandonment response and im just having a really really hard time right now. and i can’t even freely talk about it to anyone or even write about it in my journal. i’m just. so sad right now. i’m not abandoned but i feel that way. i have been feeling abandoned for a while now and a small thing that happened last night really amped it up. then this morning i woke up with a crazy amount of physical pain and fever from said illness and im also severely dehydrated because i have been too upset to drink water so i’ve been forcing myself to drink lots of water all day. and had to take painkillers and sleep the fever off. all by myself. i hate being by myself. but it was worse when i was living with family back in bangladesh. somehow i felt even lonelier and more horrible there. lately i’ve had very little hope about myself and my future. i’m just going through a rough time mentally. so are my loved ones. i’m sobbing as i’m writing about this. this isn’t even bad. like it’s just my mental illness over reacting and my hormones possibly amplifying the negative emotions. but nothing terrible has actually happened it’s just that i wanted something and i can’t have it and even in my dreams, my desires plague me. it all sounds vague but that’s on purpose because i can’t openly talk about it. even when faced with much greater difficulty, i have handled things better but right now even though it’s not actually that bad, i feel exceptionally sad. i did my groceries. made the right decisions. i literally did my very fucking best today. and yet i feel nothing but awful awful awful. even some self hatred and self pity. i’m having a hard time trying to logic myself out of this one. maybe it just needs some time. the problem is that i don’t have all that much time to give. i have a class early tomorrow and it’s one of those classes that i really have to participate in and even though i normally look forward to this class, im dreading it right now. i dont have the energy to learn a whole bunch of things right now. and my friends invited me for drinks after classes, which is great but sucks because i literally have 5$ in my bank account to last me the whole week, and today was just monday. idk how this happened. actually i know exactly how this happened, i paid of my medical bills when i got paid this weekend. that’s why i have nothing left. but it’s a big relief. that i have paid off all my hospital debt. it’s a huge deal. and it’s done. now temporarily i’ll struggle a little but it’ll be okay soon. also it was just 11:11pm and i made a good wish. i’m going to try my best to bring it to fruition. rn im still a bit sick, and im not gonna beat myself up for having a bad couple of days. i know im doing my best. my best is not as good as other people’s but it’s mine. and i am choosing to go easy on myself. i’m feeling a fever coming back. the plan for the rest of the night is to maybe rest till my fever goes away. then watch the movies i downloaded w the library wifi, because guess what, i didn’t have money to get wifi this month. so i barely use my data and i try to download as much as i can at uni and at the library. it has been kind of good for me. to be off the internet mostly. this reminds me i should deactivate my instagram soon. idc if i loose my work flow. or maybe try to find balance between life offline and online. after i’m done resting and my fever subsides, ill boil some eggs and what not. i deserve to eat well. nvm im back to crying in my fetal position. oh god i feel so bad. i feel so bad right now. i can’t do anything about this. and the things that i can fix, i don’t. this is literally my life. crying about things i can’t control and ignoring the things i can control

this is the worst i have felt in 2024 so far. i’m so sad that it’s giving me a headache. i’m so disoriented and confused and tired and sad i don’t wanna do anything. i’m depressed as fuck. why does this happen to me. oh god i let a couple of hours pass, and i’m doing a little bit better. this is so stupid.

[stayxlix]

WOOOO THIS CHAPTER TOOK ME OUT. THIS CHANGED THE PERSON I AM 🗣TUTTER IS INNNN THIS BITCHHHHH FOR THE FIFTH TIME OKAYY, THESE ASKS GONNA STAY GETTING LONGER AND LONGERRR AND MORE AND MORE UNHINGEDDD‼️YOUVE RUINED ME👹👹

Just Picture That Scene Of Spongebob Losing His Marbles When Patrick Put The Lens Cap On That Damn Camera Before They Started Filming.Dats Me Right Now.

Not Even Giving Fanfic At This Point lol Im Genuinely ASTONISHED! I Feel As If I'm A Crook😪 I Don't Even Have Any money,But Ill Send You A Quarter In Spirit Since That's All I Can Spare.I Would Most DEFINITELY Buy This If It Was A Actual Book Tbh.

In All Reality,Such Talent Cannot And Should Not, Go Under The Radar. You Have My Support And Tutter Wishes You A Damn Good Day.( Just A Day I Really Gotta Spare Some Of That Energy For Me Ya'know♻️.)

Give Your Glorious Brain A Break,TRUST We Gon Need It For This,Its A BIG THING.AND As Always, GIVE YOURSELF YOUR PROPS( I'm Gonna Have To Claim This Emoji It Just Fits Me Best👹)

I AM ON THE EDGE OF MY SEAT FOR PART SIX

AHH IM SO GLAD YOU LIKED THE CHAPTER😭😭💕pls feel free to send me any and all of your unhinged thoughts i swear i LIVE for long asks🥹

you never fail to make me laugh omg with the photos and the punctuation idk why but that sends me (and the spongebob reference💀) i love it lmao. seriously though thank you so much for such an enthusiastic response im so thrilled to hear that the chapter had such an impact on you, your support and encouragement always means so much to mee ill do my best to keep you on the edge of your seat.🤭 and to hear that you would spend actual physical money on my story if it were a novel??!!?!!!?!?? ah my heart🥹 i can’t do this rn ilysm seriously thank you for this. from the bottom of my heart THANK YOU.😭💕 your virtual quarter is greatly appreciated lmfao i promise it will not go to waste!!

as always thank you so very much for taking the time to read and engage with my story like this it is EVERYTHING to me<333 i just woke up not too long ago but today is already a good one because of your ask. i hope you have an even better day than i do and ill do my best to rest my brain, trust me i completely understand needing to save some of that energy for yourself lmao. (ps i also agree that the👹emoji totally suits you😂) pls pls never stop being your unique and amazing self. thank you so much again for this wonderful start to my day💕💕much love♡

[strawberryezpls]

my goodness i have changed wtf

looking back to the beginning of this year till now is actually fucking insane how much has happened and how things ended up being like. I'm actually accomplishing my goals that i had planned for this year and it feels good but it's kinda like i need something else for the motivation to keep going. Umm lets see I'm finally under 200 and I can keep doing that if i watch my diet. Ummmmm should i start witht he boy who i was i was ina s ituationship with or just pick up where I lelft off? Hmm so last time i was on here I was already on talking terms with my ex(yea ik bad) but it was kinda innocent. (not really lmao) then I got my wisdom tooth surgery and i had a little complication bc it was not healing up properly. Thennnnn I had my bday how i planned it. I even bought myself a little camera but it dies so quick so rip. Ooo i turned 21 if you didn't know and i had my first whiskey shot at midnight thanks to no relationship man. (Imma call him teddy bear bc thats what it gave and reminds me of the song teddy bear by melanie martinez. Oooo i finally got into a relationship with teddy bear but i pratcially begged him tbh. oh and before that i got my grand,as car towed from his apartment........ i don't wanna even revisit im just glad i didn't have to pay for it. And then i went to see melanie martinex for her 3 album tour and it was MAGICALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL. as per usuall life went downhill after seeing such a queen. I was =n't doing too hot spring quarter and that why im taking my last class i needed. However i did sign my lease for the dorms imma be living so I'm offically a university gal! regarding to that i got a second job just for the summer to help with paying for college but tbh let be real lmao. lets just say if i thought i was busy in january this is nothing compared. oh and I dyed my hair in may becaseu i felt like it but im back to my natural color and in pain bc my hair is so weak rn. ummmmmmm today i'm finally goign to be a manager at my main job and iim so excited but nervous. I've been acting like this role for a while now but there's always going to be something unexpected that comes up. But thankfully everyone is supportive and does what they can and I'm not alone in the suffering at all(at least i hope im not) oh and i got into a fight with my fatehrr so i have to stay at my aunts house temporaily like where i'm typing from. I miss being home bc it was my set place where i had everythign i needed. which reminds me like you know how i said i think i have autism yeah idk i think i also show signs of ocd...... i wont go into detial bc thats not ur bussiness but i tend to have very obessive thoughts like never ending too so theres that. I cannot wait for september to come and i can focus on school and have a change. i have to start packing or planning things now though and that makes menervous bc my mom obviously doesn't want me to go. but whatever omg and i started using tampons and I've only had 2 success days lmao but i'm gettign there. Idk if this wasn't obious but i broke up with teddy bear to foucs on myself and i don't reakky have the energy to be with him it just too drianing yk. However i somehwo managed too get all the bosy i've shown interest to spin back like didn't think it was possible. just wow y life is really changing and i feel like i can't keep uup even thoughi felt like that in april and I was keeping up just fine. anyways I think thats it i could start to do think pieces again not that anybody is reading this. I wish i could say every detail but so much is happening at once in my life. it wasn't like this a year ago which is crazy to say. Like i never thought i would be here like this a year ago tbh. I think that's a good thing becasue i wanted to live a busy life like everyone. I don't know how i still have time for tiktok and instagram on the daily but whatever. I don't even post as much on instagram yea very sad. I'm becoming more mysertious by the day. and sharing over there just feels useless like my august/july-december era was one or the books.

[violentdelightsandviolentends]

literally dropping in here to rant, so feel free to ignore!! omg girl, school is literally kicking my ass rn. its currently 1:20 am and i have my neuroscience final tmr at 4:30 and i've only gotten through reviewing two units bc theres just so much information. and when i was studying in the library earlier, there were so many people and everyone was talking SO LOUDLY! like please, its a library, do yall not have finals that you need to be studying for?? and that just stressed me out so much more, i was on the verge of tears. so then i went to this study thing w my friends, and one friend gets it bc shes also stressed out of her mind, but my other two friends arent really worried for their finals, so they were just kinda nonchalant about studying, which was kinda frustrating bc they kept asking me to go walk around with them. and im like queens, as much as i would love to, i literally cannot afford that right now. and then they were talking about what they were doing before my stressed friend and i were like hey can we leave we are so tired and need to go home, and they were like 'well yall couldve joined us' and atp i was getting pissed off bc we have had a long day and have done nothing but study and they didnt seem to get that. to me, the least they couldve done was be like fake sympathetic. anyway, i was like well actually we couldnt because some of us have hard classes that require a lot of review for finals. and they were like well, you still couldve taken a break. like girl i havent taken a break all day and im still nowhere near being done with studying. idk im just very frustrated and stressed out and needed to get this out before i actually blow up on them. hope you are doing well queen!! - from a very stressed, very tired, and starved 🏁 anon

omg hi babe. hope you’re looking after yourself!! remember, your brain needs food and water and sleep to function properly. that’s all part of preparing for an exam too!!

let me know how you think it went!! wishing you all the luck in the world. you’ll smash it <3

having friends who don’t have the same work ethic as you is really exhausting actually. I had the same situation when I was getting my degree, and it’s tough. it sometimes really does feel like you’re fighting an uphill battle, and sometimes like you’re the only one that actually cares to do well. you just have to get your head down and do what’s best for you. if that upsets people, so be it. it’s your future after all <3

you’re stressed and exhausted because you care so much about your education. and that is something to be very, very proud of. I promise you.

you know where I am if you need me. sending you all the luck and positive energy <3

[1d1195]

SAM MY LOVE I MISSED YOU SO MUCHHHHH!!!!😭 it felt so weird not being able to talk to you😭 how are you my love?!? How was your break?!?

AHHHH SO MUCH TO CATCH UP ON BESTIE!!!

And you’re right we really are so similar that I honestly did not take it in a bad way! If anything I always appreciate your insight! Exams were hell but like it’s whatever at this point lol I have one last round of midterms in two weeks before my finals so I will be ✨suppressing✨ my feelings on that until I’m done bahaha BUT OMG I QUESTION MY FRIENDS CHOICES TOO BAHAHA I have had a history girl…. It’s a lot for sure for another day lol AND OMG SAM HOT PROFESSOR 😵‍💫 he’s sooooo omg I could cry bc he’s so hot and I seriously always spiral in class lol he puts effort in his fits but like still does not look exaggerated anyways idk if I mentioned before but HES A BIKER!!! And he’s so sweet and he always ends class with “see ya later gang” like 😭 THE DILF VIBES THAT HE EMITTS ARE CRAZY😭

Yeah I can totally agree with obsessions and the TOLL that it is lol like I feel so bad for my parents that they wasted so much money on me shopping at hot topic 😭 anyways still was fun though lol I definitely wish I had that energy again bc I simply cannot keep up anymore lol

Bestie I read part 3 and IT WAS SO GOOD !! SO MANY THOUGHTS HONESTLY oh and I read the sun kissed extra!!! So many thoughts!!! I will try to get my main points and reactions bc I feel like I wrote already too much lol

I LITERALLY WAS SO EXCITED FOR SUN KISSED EXTRA!!! I voted for that one and was surprised that it wasn’t voted on too much :( BUT IT WAS DIFFICULT TO CHOOSE BC I LOVE ALL OF THEM! Anyways I MISSED THEM SO MUCH I LITERALLY LOVE THAT STORY SOLEY BC WHERE IM FROM THE BEACH IS A BIG DEAL! Anyways I can’t believe they are moving together and Harry literally transferred to her district 😭😭😭 CRYYYYYYYY I HOPE WE CAN GET MORE OF THEM!

NOW PART 3 WAS SOOOO GOOD!!! You know I love when Harry gets jealous and possessive😵‍💫 and omg TELL ME WHY I HAVE A KYLE IN KY LIFE BAHAHAH but Kyle was so cute and honestly kinda loved he stood up for the MC and essentially was ready to go to war for her🥰 bahah anyways THEY ARE OFFICIAL NOW WHICH IS SO CUTE!!! I LOVE THEM QND IM LIVING THEOUGH THEM RN!!! I have a Kyle and all I need is a Harry 😩

Missed you so much Sam! Thank you for constantly putting out such lovely content❤️-💜

HIIIIII I've missed you SOOOOO much. I hope your exams went well, I'm sure you aced them! That seems so crazy you have midterms and you're already thinking about finals! I feel like the semester just started! I knew you were busy all week but by Friday I literally was like "Ughhh where is she!?" My break was good! Very boring, nothing to really chat about. I finished a book last week and I'm about half way through this one--it's very good. I actually think YOU would like the book I finished because I did not hahahahahahahaha don't get me wrong it was VERY well written and I did like it, but it was so stressful and not what I usually read. The Lost Girls of Willowbrook. Very creepy in my opinion.

ANYWAY.

YOU DID MENTION HE WAS A BIKER BUT I ALWAYS APPRECIATE THE REMINDER. We love a well-dressed DILF. I'm so glad you're able to learn in that environment. I would be a stuttering mess and would probs do something embarrassing like tell him I loved him or write our names together in a notebook. Did you see the pics of Harry at Manchester soccer game? He looked very DILF-y too🤤😍 I was spiraling myself.

HOT TOPIC I'M SCREAMING. I got my Edward shirt from Hot Topic and I wore it every night to bed like a a LUNATIC. (Now much more appropriately, I wear my Harry's House to bed and do NOT feel like a lunatic). But you're right I do not have the energy anymore. The CONSPIRACIES and THEORIES people have I am so overwhelmed, I don't know what to say. I'm not a Swiftie (not an anti-Swiftie either) but HOLY COW. "She wore purple so that means--" "The date adds up to the number 13" "In 2010 on this date she posted this so in 2024 that means this" ?????? THAT'S CRAZY, but like good for them. I'm in awe tbh.

Aw! I'm so glad you voted for them! I have another round of voting coming this week and I feel like it will be VERY split five different ways hahahaha I'm a beach girl as well! I feel like it's one of the only things I have a good grasp on writing about because it was so entrenched in my childhood. I don't know if I have any other ideas for them at the moment (I feel like all the couples I've been writing about lately/voted on are getting engaged this week and next week 🤭 --spoiler/not spoiler: not MFT they're just babies). But I can try and come up with something eventually. I gotta reshare my draft list so everyone can see inside my head, it's getting wilder by the minute.

I'm currently writing the 4th part to MFT and I feel like the first two parts were really good and parts 3 and 4 are very 🤷‍♀️ I'm so glad you liked Kyle! (I wanted to name him Noah actually but I think I mentioned I'm a big Noah Kahan fan right now and it was too coincidental; I noticed when I had his character say "that makes a lot of sense" and I was like "okay, Samantha, that's a literal song lyric, make it more obvious." So I renamed him Kyle). Idk if you read Icebreaker (it was very big on TikTok for a while) Kyle is modeled after Henry a bit. He's a cutie pie 😊

TELL ME MORE ABOUT YOUR KYLE!?!?!?!?! 😍

SO happy to hear from you, hope you had a relaxing weekend after a busy week, sorry for the novel rambling in response but you should not feel bad about writing too much. It's always the highlight of my day when I get a message from you! 💕

xoxo

[maliciousmalfeasance]

If I typed a live review of my spotify discover would you read it? Too late- (Indie-rock/pop, punk, ???, mid-west emo, math-rock,etc Be warned I am a hater about some petty shit lmao)

Carousel- CJ the X 

This song is beautifully produced, the melody of “everything will be alright” sounding just slightly off kilter and perfectly fits the teetering vibes of the song. I love the carnival vibe- lyrics flow so effortlessly. The RUNS BRO. Really perfect window into a probably fucked up breakdown. Hope things got better CJ <3 “I don’t blame anybody but me/ You’re too kind, I am a disease!” oof.

A big brown dog named bagel- Nep

“I kind of wanted to bite-” I love the incorporation of bossa grooves into this indie rock, gay as hell love song. “I feel like we’re gonna marry way too quickly” This feeling. Really cute. Vocals are so sweet- you just kind of want to scoop the vocalist up and hug her. 

PINEAPPLE UPSIDE DOWN - QUEEF JERKY, ethan is online

The best of the worst or the worst of the best? The beat switch up had me actually grooving- good shit. "Go to the zoo and see some fish."

Spirit Week- happy trendy

So cozy, comfy, fuzzy. Whenever I hear fuzzy vocals it feels like my ears are being hugged idk why. Sad but in a kind of melancholy optimist way? If that makes sense. Chords got a little tired by the end but I forgive all sins for fuzzzzzzzz

Glow- Alice Phoebe lou 

Aussie vocals perhaps? "When you were dreaming, I looked in. I saw everything." What a sweet, dizzy tune. Sounds like getting drunk in a carpeted room that looks like it’s from the 70s. “I’m a lover, just never knew how” Relatable. Vocalist has this really nice vibrato that reminds me of judy garland or ella fitzgerald, such a nice warm tone. Lots of hug songs in here. I’m a lover of this one. C:

Wasteland- wooded fang

Surf rock type of vibe? Feels like something I’d listen to as the sun sets on a long car trip- about to have a delirious few hours outside of time. I cannot fathom my man’s lyrics but he’s got such a relaxed delivery it’s real fun. Good vibe. "dododododododododo"

Feelin down- primrose

Drum good. Fr the production/recording on these drums is so nice. I feel like im sitting in the drummers lap but in a comfy way- like the rest of the song is absolutely great also but man.. I appreciate the work that went into getting these drums so nice. Also love the moments where the band stops. Love a stop. Satisfying. Ngl the vocals are nice but I wish he’d put a lil more OOmf in it y’know? Just like SEND IT.

 I Fade Away- Tulips Ballad, M.E, CAT DAD

The high vocals really made this for me, just came in and I was like aaah yeah. Then together?? Lovely. Such nice harmonies. Only wish there was a little less repetition but Idk that might just be me listening too hard rn lmao. I like the more subtle production bits but like, the main guitar loop doesn’t have much movement and it left me a lil like… what if you did more? Bass good. I like the piano but what if.. different chord?

Grade A- Spill Tab, JAWNY

I… might be getting fatigued from listening to all this stuff but these chords at the end feel like the same as the last song bro I’m a lil disappointed. It’s just so quick and so… clean? In a bad way? Lmao I think it feels overproduced to me. So many production decisions that don’t feel like they serve the song and only a couple that really feel earned. (cheated and gave it a second listen because I felt kind of bad about having mostly negative comments. Both the vocalists are great and the quality of production is real nice, I just think the producer needed to pull back a bit and let the vocalists do their thing, y'know?)

Only At Your Convenience- Graham Kartna

Big Jack Stauber energy.. Perhaps… too much Jack Stauber energy? I can’t tell if this was a deliberate attempt to emulate the style as an experiment or not. The drowned chords, the vocals that jump down suddenly, all the little cartoon samples. OK I had a look and he’s def got a voice and a sound this song just happens to REALLY sound like it’s going for a Jack Stauber vibe, most of his other stuff is similarly drowned and sample heavy but like… distinct enough that I wouldn’t think to associate the two- it’s literally just this song so he is forgiven in my eyes. Peace and love on planet earth. Honestly I’d forgive him emulating Jack really hard too I mean fuck it man do what satisfies ya. (gave this a second listen and idk why I thought it was so close actually this is good and fine.)

easy - waveform*

Oh! I’ve def heard this one before, love the big warm acoustic guitar+sad vocal. Gay and cute. “I’m on the stairs in a beautiful gown, and you look so stupid your teeth on the ground.” Love the imagery in these lyrics. 

Diane- Dad feels, Yelle 

Holy fuck I hate this man. I haven’t listened to the song yet I’m just like- before I make any comment you have to know I’m severely biased against him lmao He sucks he makes me incredibly uncomfortable to watch. ANYWAY presses play hm. Ok. wow. BAD. First song of his I’ve ever listened to and holy fuck. Worse than I thought. Nothing to like about this. It's so low effort. I’m just trying desperately to tune this trash out while I wait for the next song. Holy fuck. OH THANK GOD

Kill your radio- Heartsrevolution

Cute! Feels like something that would play in a scene while a stereotypical girly character beats the shit out of someone. Is that insane? Idk man. maybe I’m just thinking about violence because of dad. It’s fuzzy. The guitars and vocals got that sweet high fuzz on them. This toes the line for me of being like slightly over produced also but I think it’s just my taste. 

Becky- Be Your Own Pet

I’ve heard this one too! It’s just such an edgy teenage hatred song. Just real petty and fun to yell along to. Love the story and the little moments where the band all yells BECKY AAAAA. Good shit. 

Dark matter- Little Big League 

Oh such a sweet sleepy vocal with nostalgic guitars. Love the way the main vocal kind of leans around the notes, feels so effortless. The slight edge in the tone is used so sparingly but so well, such a cool voice. Oh man!! Sorry band you’re great too I just love these vocals!!! I want more growls but I’m feral for growls- the way that tone is used so sparingly to great effect is lovely. 

Better Go- Mel blum 

Familiar with this one too. Just a really catchy, chill tune. Love the stops and little rhythm guitar moments. “Guess I ain’t using my body anyway.” Yeah. Solid tune fr. Love the floaty vibe of the vocals.

Random Firl -Late Of The Pier

Glanced at the band bio and apparently the band formed when they were 16/17 which is cute. They haven’t released anything in a long while but I wanna believe they’re all still friends. Feels like a song I’d have played on repeat in 2015 when I was in a Smallpools phase. The vocal harmonies are very sweet, such a nice wall of sound. Left me wanting more!! AA

You Make me smile- Mamalarky

This squishy bass is fun. Another soft, floaty voice- I guess Spotify is recommending all of these because I listened to so much Stella Donnelly last year. Really like the structure of this song, the way that the synths swell and fall again to make room for the guitar and piano… Just really cool vibes. Love that blending of synth and ‘real’ instrument. Yeah. Just kind of vibing here. Adding this one to my likes for sure. I feel like what sets this apart from some of the others is that the instrumentation is interesting and thick without drowning or outshining the vocals which is hard as heck to do right!!

IDC- carpetgarden 

First few lines are like. Damn. Yeah. Lyrics are heavy but in a fuck this kind of way. Their vocals are so sweet and yet kind of bored sounding? Genuinely really like the vibes. There’s a great energy to the guitars that makes you wanna dance around, real sad but happy at the same time. Kind of song I’d listen to while on the way somewhere to get myself in a good mood lmao. “Worms in my brain and my eyes are full of daisies, My body’s melting and it feels a-fuckin’-mazing” 

Wicca Kids- Pacific Purgatory

This song is underwater! Pull it out!! AAA! Fr tho it’s so muffled it feels like I’m listening through a wall. Kind of a vibe? I do kind of want it a little less muddy tho. I really like the vocals- feels like they’re hiding I wanna drag them out to the front of the mix. This is prob intentional. It is nice, I’m just making grabby hands at all the high frequencies rn. Baby come back. 

Vampire- Lupin

The shades in that title and song name. Chefs kiss. These vocals are great, confident and straight shooting. They cut through really well. Oh no wonder I like this, he’s the vocalist from hippo campus. Solid song. Not super my current taste but it’s definitely hitting every ball it’s trying to hit… if you get me. Knows what it’s about. 

You’re Terrific - LoudFoxCult 

I love the way the two vocals play off each other. This came out in 2018, real cute highschool indie rock vibe and yet- like way better than you’d expect from a highschool indie band so like.. Yeah. Terrific, even.

Scott Pilgrim- Plumtree

Omg I love Plumtree. Punk girls from the 90s kickin ass. I love this band. This is a great song, I like In The Sink better tho. The main lick is super catchy though I can see why this is their most listened to.  “I’ve liked you for a thousand years” Repeated over and over and over because yeah dude I’ve liked you FOREVER. 

WasteUrTime- Kevin Walkman

Bassline hits. Licking my fingers baby this shit tastes GOOOOOD am I going insane? Idk man this song just has a really satisfying groove going, vocalist has a great laidback tone. Feels perfect for the vibe of the lyrics. Horny songs gotta have a goood bass line and y’know. This one did it. 

brittle (wake up)- Meltycannon

I know this band but can't place them. Really love the grunge/hiphop vibes??

When You Are Not Around- The Band Ice Cream

Breakup song if ever I heard one, “I like you more, when you are not around.” Angry and mean in a satisfying way, feels like a diary entry I wrote about an ex. Just like- raw and unfair amounts of bitterness, you know? Kind of shit you’d never actually say. Well idk maybe you would. I’m only mean in my diary tho. Mostly. Cough. “I don’t fucking care if it hurts you” 

How Could You Ever Think I Hated You?- Cloning

HAHA opposite vibes completely and holy shit a band from perth!!! The aussie accent feels so comfy to me in music mwa. Feels lik the accent is almost going american in parts- maybe that’s just the Perth accent tho idk any perthians. Jumpscared by the stop in the middle of the song lmao i was like NOO. Guitars are lovely, feels like a real lived-in sound. Love the vibe

Meet me in Montauk- Retirement Party

“Had a head so big it sank into the ground.” The noodles in the guitar always make my heart happy- very midwest emo. Just a very cozy angsty song. This is the type of music that turns my brain to like nostalgic goo. “I’m not sure if i don’t believe in a God or if he doesn’t believe in me” - something my 11 year old self would cry about fr. I love how raw and unornamented the vocals are- it’s a mark of the genre for sure but it just makes the lyrics hit even harder. 

I Dropped Out- And The Kids

Feels like I’ve heard this one a thousand times and yet it’s not in my likes. The vocals are swimmin' in reverb and they’re just- asufghdsuigifih I Love The Dreamy-ness. The “I went to graduation" line coming back with altered timing/tone always hits so good idk it’s such a simple thing but with the force of the band crescendo behind it- it’s like. Fuck yeah, you did!

Been thinking- Fishing In japan

SO laid back, these lyrics flow so naturally- the vocals sound half asleep in the best way. Solid band. Nothing really stands out to me more than the silly sleepy vocals which are a very good vibe, kind of wish the guitars were played a little less straight to emphasise the drag of the vocals. It’d be different song. Better? Maybe? But this song is nice too. 

And that’s all wowweeeee

[twinstarlovers]

Finally being alone. It’s been a whole year lol. Time to get back to myself lol but I hope you are good. I’ve been thinking about you here & there. I’m glad I got to live all last year for once in my life or be free. I wanna say it was good karma just coming back to me after all these years but I think this year it’s gonna be REAL good karma. Idk if I told you but I met this stranger at Olive Garden, she was a host but the person I was w asked what book she was reading & it was spiritual book & her & I just start talking or whatever & she was like she’s been looking for a spiritual buddy to go to sound baths w & shit & I’m like girl ME TF. She’s 30 LMFAO but you can tell she’s really in touch w her inner child. She’s also a leo lol. I texted her but we haven’t spoken much probably cus she’s busy or idk & idc but it was awakening that I needed to get back into my spirituality. I’ve also attempted to dye my hair purple. Literally nothing happened but I could see a bit & it was fire. Maybe soon but ima just go black in the meantime again cus whatever this color is I don’t like it. It’s like a brownish/red like nah bruh. Im tired of my natural hair lol. Anyways I have nobody & im here for it. My soul was itching to be alone for a while now. Im sober too yay for me. I’ve been drinking again too which is good. Like my body can handle it cus idk if you remember I told you I would get sick so I just stopped drinking altogether but yeah now I can drink so that’s good. I haven’t been smoking cus no. Mostly because I wanna be more stable emotionally & mentally or I wanna get used to be being alone cus high me intensifies my inner world so if I am not used to being alone or at peace I’m gonna be thinking of the past & the past is what I’m tryna let go of rn. I also stopped w tarot cards because I used them too much & I noticed they would go missing (probably cus of that lol) so I was like well it’s not necessary rn & I should be more present & i don’t care about knowing. I’ve also been itching to go to the gym but I need a push or that right moment but it’s been on my mind like crazy. Maybe tmr (February 1st). I’ve been more disciplined w money too! LMFAOOOOOOO one of my biggest issues lol. Spending is a part of who I am lol. Also I’ve already applied for financial aide cus yes tf cus I already made the decision to get my associates in social work. So idk let’s see if it’s even gonna manifest if not then maybe I’ll make my way around it anyways. I know im not meant to overwork & it’ll all turn out in my favor. I wish I was rich & could not work but volunteer to help people just cus. The whole making money for helping people just doesn’t sit right w me 😭 but I mean I guess it doesn’t matter when that’s my intention in the first place so money is a bonus. Pisces midheaven tingz 💁🏻‍♀️✨. Anyways I feel good tho kinda. In terms of feeling like I’m human or healing. Like not on meds, having good mental & emotional health & energy to be present for a job, having energy to go to school & the gym like idk I thought I was beyond damaged tbh that it wasn’t possible for me. I wanna cry LMFAO. This song in the back tho. I’m listening to my old playlist. I wanna get back into music againnn. But yeah I’m glad I’m doing better. Unfortunately it had to take this long but im glad I can be healthy to enjoy the rest of life. It’s like living for the first time. Being a teenager for the first time, being a kid for the first time, & being an adult for the first time as well. It feels super good to have them all in synch cus I thought I lost my teenage years. I mean I did when I was actually a teenager but at the end of the day those are just numbers & im still in touch w my inner teen so dying my hair & everything feels good like I’m living it now. Im so glad I haven’t gotten my tattoos yet like I’m glad everything is happening at the time it is. It’s not rushed. I wanted everything so early but then I see everyone having everything so early that they get so tired of it so quickly or doing things early that they are tired of it & it’s like not for me!

[lostacelonnie]

Gotta keep that hope around for sure i will keep my fingers crossed for you. Oh that is a win win i gotta remember that, i say as if adhd wont make me forget. I usually just look for em to see like. What kinds are around. Whole ones. Broken ones. Weird shapes. Its interesting. Dont take any with me though. That. Makes me wonder how they teach english over there. Honestly yeah i look for a name in the bio or just. Shorthand the username somehow because i gotta have some way to refer to people. I havent used a bio in years so people use my username all the time. Oooh norway i have always wanted to go there. I dont camp as much as id like to but i should more tbh. I have seen her stacks & i gotta say. Clara is wild cant believe i let her sit unused. I dunno how much ill get but im gonna for sure be savin as i can. I think that one is last yeah. I am always interested at the start but fade by the end because the new stuff always slows down. Same ive been playing indies more like gris & obra dinn. To try & branch out. Good story annoying exploration is chasm in a nutshell yeah. True big cities be like that. I live in a smaller one now so very little happens. Mine hold dye decently well which i appreciate. Just wish we had true permanent dye. Maybe one day. Thats how i am with nail polish i always get it on the sides & mess up but ive gotta just. Be patient & let myself learn. Happy 1.2 star rail update

sorry for the late reply shfjglk i truly have no excuse other than "i was holed up in my room in an attempt to avoid interaction with my grandma but i accidentally also avoided interaction with Everyone Else" so im. So sorry ab that. COMING BACK hehe thankies!! if things go wrong i guess ill just move out for a while and then come back Suspiciously A Different Gender. nobodys gonna know. but yeah good luck on remembering that shdjfk!! and ahh thats fair i just usually visit pretty big beaches so theres not many around by the time i get there. english is taught just so you know the language but following the education system without external classes will get you a2 knowledge At Best and its getting worse with each year so. lol. and yeah frfr i use usernames as names alllll the time...... norway is very fun i recommend it!! esp if you prefer colder climates like i do. ahhh understandable!! i dont actually. own a tent but as i said, maybe one day. id rather go with friends tho which is a problem in on itself cos i dont have that many friends that actually know each other. unless i go with my photo camp friends. thats an Idea actually. YEAH CLARA IS GREAT.... i unfortunately dont have her quite built [terrible relic luck...... plus ive been more focused on trying to prepare for kafka recently] but seeing as shes my main [despite having jing yuan] i Will get her better stuff someday. i have 140 pulls rn so im equally nervous as i am excited. yeah it really Is like that bc im always paranoid ab spoilers so i always do at least the new story as fast as i can. except for right now as i still havent played the new honkai chapter [but tbf my game only managed to download the update yesterday, 3 days after the launch of 6.8] and i honestly dont have the energy to do it today so maybe tomorrow. ah that sounds fun!! i came back to minecraft recently idk why but ive been having a Great time. after 130 in-game days i am finally no longer homeless. and oh when i get older id like to move to a smaller city [since i like having things close but dont like having drama all the time] but im still thinking ab where. ah thats cool...... i tried looking for the dye that i used on camp but couldnt find it. rip. and yeah same tbh thats why i never paint my nails. and yeah happy star rail 1.2 o)-( i like the double planar ornament event since thats the only thing im missing for kafkas things......

[mosviqu]

idk how they are not embarrassed or how did they think that that's a normal thing to do🥸 WE CAN BURN SM TOGETHER THATS FOR SURE!!!

ahhh i agree i hope they realize soon that noise music is not really the way for every band😟 OOO IM GLAD U ENJOYED THEM!!!! yessss 3 I WAS SO HAPPY TO SEE THEM!!!! but im struggling so hard with recognizing them😭

WELL IF I WASNT LIED TO THEN YES SHE DID THAT!!!! UR REACTION😭THATS KIND OF FUNNY MY NGL

istg i started to associate u with him cuz of ur profile pic that u had it was such a nice pic!!! WELL I GUESS THAT BETTER THAN NOTHING (i feel like this sounds rude but i do not mean it in a rude way so i hope it doesn't come off that way) BUT I CANT BELIEVE EVERYBODY OTHER THAN TREASURE BASICALLY WAS DOING THAT CHALLENGE JUST SMH

aaaa i wish i could have other accents💔💔💔 i just have one general one and it just doesn't change so💔💔💔 lmao thats relatable but for me it never stays in my mind when i try to do a british accent i'm saying it loudly wrongly and proudly 😌🤞 (liebestraum anon💓)

LIKE they woke up and were like hm. lets send a truck to hybe. TO BOYCOTT ALL THE HARD WORK OUR FAVS DID WHEN LEARNING THE DANCE. sigh. anyways!

okay update since the boys debuted- i only vibed with the title track (?) so its a 😔 for me. but i adOOORED that song its such a feel good song and their concept is so cute i love it but i dont see myself listening to the other two songs....😔😔😔 mourning the 03 liners very deeply rn 💔 BUT BUT BUT you know what i remembered the other day ??? LIKE I LEGIT WANTED TO MESSAHE U ABT THIS but basically i got reminded of p1harmony's existence again, right, (bc i forget abt groups when i am not hyperfixated on them lol) AND I REMEMBERED INTAK IS A 03 LINER so. our crew so far consists of doyoung, seunghan, intak aNd us two. (Also im pretty sure minjae from mcnd is a 03 liner too bc i had a mental breakdown over that too when i was getting into them like 2 years ago 👀)

I HAD NO IDEA THAT HAPPENED LMAOOO THANKU FOR TELLING ME I FEEL LIKE THIS IS AN IMPORTANT INFO 😭😭😭😭 has the same energy as keeho having a stan account before being an idol LMAOO.

i was NOT a wilbur fan when hearing that song let me tell u it was on the speakers every other day i was so annoyed

im gonna cry thAT pic was so adorable wasnt it 🥺🥺🥺 like he may be 4 years older than me but i go all protective over dino like anyone dare to hurt him and i will SWING like i know how to fight. try me. TRY ME. also u never sound rude omg stop worrying abt that 😭💕 and LITERALLY i also dont get it like they arw the biggest svt fanboys and THEY DIDNT DO THE CHALLENGE ?? 😭

no bc my accent changes depending on the amount of english i speak out loud too like the less often i speak it the more slovak i sound 🤡 i dont have eng classes anymore so the only opportunity i have to speak eng is when im sending voice memos to my peruvian bestie and like the other day i listened back to it and i cringed so hard bc my english really got rUSTY 😭😭😭 i should like record vlogs so i dont lose my accent or something idk. also SPEAK THAT BRITISH ACCENT LOUD AND PROUD. show them what the uk youtube scene did to us.

[woozi]

beloved yza 🤍 how do you like the cb?

AL OMG???????? HIIIII THIS IS SUCH A NICE SURPRISE 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹

this might be long and rambly as shit but since u asked 😋 i really am SAURRRRR excited!!! i really have forgotten what svt cbs were like bc i got so incredibly busy but im SOOO so glad i'm here for it again <33 i haven't participated in anything else like i used to before (i.e: watching all the interviews, keeping up w/ all the appearances n shit 😭), so i haven't seen anything else aside from the mv & medley/did anything aside from listening to the whole EP. HOWEVER!! i can definitely say it well exceeded my expectations! for me svt comebacks just kept getting bigger and better since attacca, and honestly the pre-cb hype and General Good Vibes we were getting from that era just kept getting carried over their more recent releases! i'm glad there's that kind of energy (on my end at least) with their cbs!! and honestly, i'm so so happy to see them getting the recognition their unceasing hard work deserves. they're not a loud group, if that makes sense (like, when u ask ppl outside of korea abt kpop groups they most likely would not mention svt off the bat), but they really are so stable and they're only consistently getting bigger not only because of all the work, but also because of how well they just treat carats as well. it really does feel like we're a team to a certain extent 🥹

honestly my only gripe this time is abt the faded mono life concept bc idk... i feel like the company concept has been used and reused to death (and we've already seen so many similar concepts from the boys), but i also acknowledge that they're trying to fit it all into the fml overarching theme (and the title alone is v smart!!), but i really wish we had a ver with the traditional fits 😔 ALSO ICB I'VE MANIFESTED THIS i literally have been mentioning how i wanted crazy concept photos like the a.c.e hanbok ones to my irl carat friends and seeing it come to fruition makes me feel successful LMFAOO

there r so many things i'm glad abt w this comeback, esp chorus center dino <33 so deserved if i might say so heheheh. (im just going to ignore woozi btw) but i also fear i have cemented my dolly traits 😭 the mv for super was also such a nice surprise to me (but i also feel slightly bamboozled bc, again, this was so diff from the concept photo teasers just like attacca era as well lmfao). AND SPEAKING OF THE MV AND THE SONG ITSELF, I REALLY LIKE HOW SVT SUPER IS??? ik people say svt isn't sticking to their distinct sound anymore, but from the concept (that really speaks a lot about woozi, and which is also giving me a sense of shared childhood bc i also grew up watching dbz lmfao), THE LYRICS, and just the performance aspect of it all... it's so svt to me <333 i fr luv my team and luv my crew. ALSO LOVE THE REFERENCES THEYVE PLANTED IN THERE, everything's really well thought of. the composition of the song itself too is so fresh to me, i love how they structured the song and the way there r sm variations!! the double title track was also a smart choice it JUST makes so much sense

tracklist wise, i'm generally pleased with all of them tbh <33 also liking FML (the title track) a lot more than i expected!!! i was expecting to like it the least ngl, but not bc she's a shite track but the Sound we got from the medley just wasn't what i usually gravitate to. i expected it to be 'FML 👹' and not 'fml 😔' based on what theyve been saying tbh NDNJDJD i also fucking LOOOVE fire so much, as a noise enjoyer she's my top song rn <33 i really appreciate how they gave us a more varied sound this time around (while still being cohesive), and i really think they were able to highlight each unit's strengths so well. ALSO OBSESSED W THE PERF U SONG <333 they really never fucking miss!!! that being said though i hope we get more crazy subunits in the future (i.e: a diff mix of members) <33

i feel like i still have sm to say but i've forgotten them all bc i'm so excited LMFAOO BUT ENOUGH ABOUT ME WHAT ABOUT UUU <33 HOW HAVE U BEEN WHAT R UR THOUGHTS ON THE CB HOW R WE FEELING ABT SHORT HAIRED WONU AND HOCHI EYELINER 👁️

[key-to-my-heart]

S2 WISHFUL THINKING

hey hi hello! i haven’t really been active on tumblr but i wanted to get back into the swing of being active and posting often. so.

i decided i will take note of some of my predictions, hopes, wishes etc. for Season 2 of Rainbow High!

so i kinda wanna just cover the things we canonically have seen aka specific events and drama that has gotten introduced

- The New Roommates / Series 3 Girls

i feel like we will definitely see more of them within the coming episodes. rainbow high literally advertised the new teams as like… i think the second or third teaser for the new season

it’s interesting to me because. this makes me think of What The Runway Project is? what could it possibly be? i believe i made a post about this in the past but the main theory (and theory i believe the most in) would be a Stage Production of sorts. i mean… it makes sense!

the twins are both Performing Arts focus and are definitely the antags this season. so why wouldn’t they cause trouble in regard to a stage play? plus, bella is back. she’s literally a set designer! we have never seen her do any set designing (other than making a sketch) so it would be fun to see that! if river were to get more focus this season, he would definitely have an outlet to channel his Performing Arts creativity! plus… Daria is a song writer so like. imagine if we were to get music out of that? please. the possibilities are endless.

im also eager to see the series 3 girls dynamics. like are the rest of the girls (gabriella, georgia, emmy and daphne) all roomed together? do they get along? will they all be just as dramatic as stella, sheryl and daria’s dynamic?

but anyway. whatever the drama and the semester project is, the new teammates definitely seem to be playing a crucial role in this season.

- The Twins

i’m actually really eager to see more of them. i feel like not enough people are talking about them? season 2 is actually really interesting so far…. maybe more so than season 1… and i feel like we are going to have to thank the twins for that at some point lol

like. idek what they’re planning on doing but. i’m excited to see what it is! they’ll probably be involved in the semester project or at least causing problems to all of the roommates and teams. they’ll definitely have something going on with bella. and it seems that they have a good bond with karma (after the KWK we got). so maybe they’ll have input in any potential drama with Karma. which leads me to

- Karma VS. Violet

so. this drama has been teased at for like. ever. for what feels like forever.

this moment in Karma’s bio PLUS the commentary about violet from her and the twins in the recent KWK episode. but anyway. i’m actually super interested in whatever this drama could be??? like. why is karma watching.

we know violet adores karma, she really wants to have her in the vi life. so i’m sure she basically looks up to her! but like. will karma actually genuinely be nice with violet? keep a distance? make remarks like she did in her recent vlog? i don’t know. idk what to expect. of course it’ll have to do with vlogging or something.

- Bella

ok so there is a few things to note with bella. i’m still interested in if bella will accept to do an interview with Karma for her vlog? if so, i wonder how that would go. and i wonder how violet would feel about it. like the very last time bella was featured in vi’s vlog was on a bad note (even though they made up) but like. idk AAA

also i’m wondering how bella is gonna handle being back to rainbow high. because so far it seems she’s having trouble fitting in. will the key to her fitting in be Jade? will Jade help her figure everything out? or would it be someone else?

as much as i’d love Jade to be the reason Bella starts to feel more at home, i also love the other idea of Amaya being the reason bella feels comfortable again. Amaya was once the new girl (and of course in an awkward position because she was essentially a replacement for bella’s spot in the runway group) but. she didn’t fit in. she had to find her place at rainbow high… and it took her until the runway show to be able to truly feel comfortable.

and like. i’ve been rooting for bella/amaya dynamic for awhile now. i see a lot of potential in this duo. we know they somewhat have tension. i mean. bella had a really awkward confrontation with amaya and that was rly their first and last conversation. sure they’ve been around each other like in the music video, at the end of s1, and when bella walked into the girls dorm s2ep2 but like. that’s it.

SO ANYWAY. what i’m trying to get at is that these two definitely need to become friends. i mean. they have a LOT in common. i was talking about the new girl situation because i feel like they can relate in that way. they both had an awkward entrance into rainbow high and could bond over that. it took amaya awhile to feel at home at rainbow high… so maybe she could become friends with bella and help her feel at home! they’re both very determined leader types. they’re really passionate and! they have the same friend group! so why not become friends?

- Jade and Bella

of course i will wonder about these two! i have no clue what to expect with them. the fandom and myself are really really really wanting to see these two become a canon sapphic couple. i really want to see this happen! and mga knows this. mga knows we want to see jella happen. i mean, they literally snatched the ship name from us and plastered it into their vlogs. so they KNOW

anyway. these two are literally going through it rn. the way jade’s eyes lit up when she saw bella was back at rh. and now both of them are looking for each other and worried about each other. jade thinking bella is mad at her rn? please. i will sob. they are really holding off this jella reunion but i hope it’s for a good reason. i just want them to talk and have a good reunion… a hug……. happy tears, happy smiles…………..a love confession…

- Amaya

so i don’t really have much to say here but i’m just wondering about amaya this season. she’s definitely been advertised so much to the point that she essentially became like. THE main focus in season 1. this peeved some people but personally i loved amaya being like a sort of main character figure. she didn’t really take attention away from the other characters but also had that energy of being a main character anyway.

my point is, though, idk how she will play out in this season? like is she going to be as much of a main character as the main 6 are…. or will she play a bigger role? i have no clue. it seems bella is going to have a key focus this season, which makes sense, but it still just makes me wonder about amaya’s role this season

- Colin

i just hope this man does not get a development arc. i know some people want him to…. but i just. i don’t. i don’t understand. the point of him existing was to show that cheating is wrong and to display girl power. by teaching that skyler didn’t need a man to prove her worth. that she is her own person. her own strength! i really hope that colin and bella don’t have anything omfg.

- Winter Break

i’m really. REALLY excited for the winter break arc. it’s about time we get to see some backgrounds outside of rainbow high! plus the animated tidbits of ruby, sky, and violet in their wb outfits in the wb commercial was everything.

i’m so excited to see their new hairstyles, to see them with their snow gear and more. omg. of course i think the twins will be involved in this arc someone. krystal briefly mentioned the twins’ family having a ski lodge. and then of course we see sunny with her skis so like. yea!! i just wonder how these episodes would play out. or episode. but anyway like… will they just vibe? or will there be a problem of sorts? if it’s winter break then it probably won’t tie into school or like projects or anything like that

- Kia Hart

i’m actually hoping kia gets some focus this season. like. what is she going to do? is she going to pair another couple together? (if so, please be jella. okay wait seriously what if she is the key to reuniting jade and bella together… anyway) i just hope to see more of her and possibly more of her and krystal together haha. but kia just vibes so far, it would be lovely to get more of her!

- The A’s

so ainsley is finally beginning to get some attention! i really hope we continue to get more of her as well as avery, and aidan of course! we did get a bunch of content of aidan but you can never have enough honestly.

but i just wonder about how the A’s will be this season. like will they do anything significant? are bella and avery going to remain close? what is going on!!!

- The Malibu Line

so we literally know nothing about this except

but i still wonder like. if we will get to see anything about it at any point during the web series. perhaps it would be more of a summer thing. but it definitely means something if Bella is in it! (also i’m just generally excited for her new doll. omfg.)

- The Rock Line

so we also know almost nothing about this except

saw someone discuss that the music being heard during s2ep2 could be in regards to the rock battle. honestly. what if this is some sort of project? battle of bands or something? that would be cool lol. anyway i’m intrigued for this line mainly because of all the clothing leaks we have been getting omg.

- The Slumber Party Line

we have known about this for a little while (with the theory of the baby blue girl being in it) but i’m just curious as to who the characters are and if they will be in the web series at all.

- Jett Dawson

okay so. this is a big one. jett being a collector doll, i feel like she’ll definitely play a crucial role in the series. so like. who will she be to the main characters? it says she’s generally nice. why was she giving that look to the girls after their runway performance? IDK! i have no clue what to expect with her. i feel like the expectations i had for amaya (before we knew anything about her) will be put into jett because. the vibes i got from amaya ever since we just had her doll… i am also kind of getting from jett. so i’m eager!

[virtuangel]

mimimimi … D + Q (for ur vity line???) + W ???? 💖

ERIIIIIIIIII smooch for u thank u

d: your favorite dance?

astro again comes to mind... idk if that's my actual final real answer but that's always the first choreo that comes to my mind i'll update u if i find another choreo that i decide i like much more

q: a quality your bias shows that you absolutely love? (vity edition)

well this is an obvious one and even more for u since u get to hear me mention this seven times a day but wonjin is a born entertainer and i Live for that...wonjin employment when he's so good... mc ham u are my everything... the energy the humour the right amount of sass or sarcasm the camera presence ... he has it all when is someone going to cast him in some variety... (and a drama actor wanji return when ... but that's another topic for another day)

ruby is well. well u know this this is going to be obvious for u again once again bc i dont shut up but he's the perfect man all around a caretaker to a degree and as u urself noticed. i tend to like that,, although i feel like out of all the caretakers i bias he might be one of the more lowkey ones?

wouldn't say it's my fave thing about him but i like that despite being the leader and a wolf n tied oldest n built like that serim still manages to like. not be the scariest man alive (quite the opposite actually as long as hes not chasing ppl around yknow) like...i was gonna say he has those moments where he just acts...maybe not like a Child but like u know what i mean...but i feel like its not Moments that he has it's more of a constant rllysbfksd but like he's like affectionate n playful and like annoying nd attention seeking in the best way possible?? idk if im making myself clear at all rn but like . gestures . he's cute is what i'm saying i'm not gonna go on longer about this uve heard enough

nd finally jungmo uhhhhhhh for some reason this is like . really hard like . idk if this counts under this question at all but like . overall he's just a born idol i think? like to a degree this is true of a lot of vity members but smth about jungmo just screams this man just Had to debut u know? i wouldnt say hes the Most outstanding performer or the most outstanding dancer or the most outstanding vocalist in vity (which is not bc i have smth against him at all obv it's just . u know? also it doesnt mean he isnt An Outstanding performer bc he is but like . i mean . I MEAN U GET IT DONT U ERI im sure u get it) but despite that he's like . like he stands on stage or even just in front of the camera and he just has this aura u know like . ???? like u know ??? . what am i saying i dont know i hope u got what i was trying to convey bc i cant do better

w: something you wonder about?

ok so like i guess it's not rlly my business at all but like ive been thinking... u know groups with a very specific dedicated concept like. u know. elast kingdom mayb pixy come to mind... dreamcatcher too but (ull see when i actually say what i wanna say this will b relevant) i think their sound is catchier/easier to like...get popular compared to the other ones i mentioned idk BUT SO u know i dont like change and also it's just like ... a selfish mindset of like a casual fan ig bc it's not really affecting ME but like......do u think they regret having debuted with a set concept like that... bc like they likely had very little say in it and like it's . harder to get popular that way? so like....do u think they like.......wish they hadn't.......? yknow? am i making sense

[littlx-songbxrd]

Ok I meant to answer you're question about what I thought of the show ages ago but I forgot.

I LOVED IT OMGGGG! I got so many kitty vibes from Wilhelm and Simon! The touching! The softness! It's those vibes exactly! I want that energy in TWP.

COMRADE SIMON!! We stan! That speech he made at the very beginning about the differences in attitudes towards "tax evasion" vs. "Welfare fraud." Legend behavior.

Sara!!!! My girl!!!!!! An autistic/adhd character PLAYED BY AN AUTISTIC ACTRESS!!!! THIS IS SO HUGE!!! I would die for my problematic queen. I made an entire post on her but the gist is, I get where she's coming from and understand why she feels the way she feels but dear God girl make better choices and stay the hell away from August.

Speaking of.... I wanna run August over several times. Vroom vroom motherfucker. The fact that he

- filmed MINORS HAVING SEX AND TGE POSTED IT ONLINE

-kissed Sara behind Felice's back when they were still dating WITHOUT HER CONSENT BTW

- Wanted to blame Simon for the drugs because he knew it would be easy because Simon's family is lower class and doesnt have the same social standing as one of the "members of the society"

- Also it didn't escape my notice that the cult like faternety type group with all the rich, mainly white boys is called The Society. This shows commentary on class is vv interesting. Especially the little things like two girls just randomly advocating for THE DEATH PENALTY. The rich people audacity.

-Anyways back to August, when he tried to excuse his actions with Wilhelm and get all teary like no bitch you can't manipulate your way out of this one. And again with Sara! When he said "Wilhelm has everything" I wanted to scream! Like he's fucking closeted and clearly suffering from panic attacks and extreme anxiety you moron.

-Anyways!! I also think that Wilhem might be autistic because he just feels autistic. Like the vibes are there.

- The girl group is so sweet? And to have the popular girl be a Black girl who isn't "stereotypically attractive" with a more medium sized body and bad acne. As someone who has really bad skin I needed that. Felice is kinda awesome imo.

Let me see what else??

-Simon and his mom speaking Spanish consistently throughout the show. It sounded pretty natural to me? But I'm not a native speaker. (Or even fluent honestly lol.)

- Simon and Wilhelm are honestly so adorable and in love and it made my heart ache. (I am so touch starved I swear..)

-My only main beef is the outing plotline and the show using an outdated medical term for Sara, aspergers. It's literally just autism. Also it's kind of offensive because Hans Asperger was a n*zi who literally killed autistic children because they weren't useful to capitalism. SOOOO yeah.

As for the outing plotline, I feel like the cishets have like three plotlines that they use for queer stories. Outing/coming out, one of them dies, or one if them bullies the other until they both fall in love. It's tired.

But overall I really loved it.

HI SORRY I HADNT REPLIED

I wanted to correctly talk to you about this series so I logged in through my computer to make it easier for me :D

LOOK AT THIS POINT IVE RELATED THEM TO LITERALLY EVERY COMFORT SHIP I HAVE LIKE. I've compared this to kitty, I've compared this to Thomastair, I've compared this to my friends to ocs who she has obsessed me with (youd actually like them if you liked this tbh) IVE COMPARED ME TO MY OCS

BUT AT THE END OF THE DAY I JUST LOVE THEM

IF KITTY DOESNT HAVE THIS ENERGY IN TWP WHAT WAS THE POINT

what was the point cc??

S I M O N

OH GOD WHEN HE SAID THAT I WENT OMG YEAH

new favorite character

Great

SHES PLAYED BY AN AUTISTIC ACTRESS?? Sorry I hadn't known! Haven't actually gotten to obsessively look at the cast I've been trying to get over the last episode BUT THATS SO COOL. SARA IS AMAZING AND I ADORE HER. I'll read your post after this! But of course STAY THE HELL AWAY FROM AUGUST GIRL PLEASE

Tbh I understood where she was coming from with everything with Simons image falling apart and her having to suffer when she had just started having friends , just after finding he had been lying to her. But love, AUGUST?

A U G U S T ???

WHO JUST FOUND OUT OUTED YOUR BROTHER

Also random and stealing this from @marzzinaa i totally hc Sara as a demi girl for some reason

Im kinda sad we didnt see her speak spanish as much we did simon :(

But oh well I LOVE HER AND YEAH STAY AWAY FROM AUGUST GOD

FAE WE RUN HIM OVER TOGETHER BROOM BROOM

You already said it all, I just agree

Ok I'll bring a machete you bring whatever you wish and we kill him sound good?

ALSO YEAH I TOTALLY NOTICED HOW THE ECONOMIC DINAMICS CAME INTO PLAY AND HOW IT BASICALLY LET YOU KNOW HOW THE PRIVILEGED ELITES COULD GET AWAY WITH ANYTHING

meanwhile they wanted to pass off to Simon who came from a lower class family the blame

Also I'd like to mention how that would also play into the stereotype latinos are all drug dealers

Which I love how they didnt make his dead beat alcoholic man the latino parent, when I first read the description I thought they might do that, but im so glad they didnt

I think it might have been a comentary idk i liked that they DIDNT make the poc parent the dead beat

THE FRIEND GROUP WAS SO COOL AND I LOVED ALL OF THEM AND YES FELICE WAS JUST <3

I love how they didnt make her stereotypically perfect AND YES MID SIZED REP WAS AMAZING TO SEE

Also im so glad you got to see that represented!!

So I am a native speaker and him talking to his mom MADE ME CRY

it was WONDERFUL I WANT MORE OF IT

pls most her phrases reminded me to my own mom

Autistic wilhelm you say?? omg tell me more (if you want)

Oh thats awful, well I'll just refer to Sara as autistic and hope the showrunners fix that next season because if they dont-

Yikes

Oh yeah, thats valid critisism. But in my opinion they actually wrote it pretty well so I wont really be complaining about an overall media problem with queer stories rn. If so I'll be here all day. But yeah its an overall problem but it wasnt done bad in my opinion so!

I'll shut up, for now

IM SO GLAD YOU LIKED IT FEEL FREE TO KEEP TALKING ABOUT IT WITH ME PLS ITS MY OBSESSION NOW IM GONNA BE ANNOYING ABOUT IT ALL MONTH