#idk each day I hate it more and more
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“Oh don’t pick apart the rwrb movie and critique the fuck out of it gay people also deserve cringy movies, why can only straight people have cringy cheesy bad movies?”
The thing is than they don’t
I also criticize those movies regardless of if they’re straight or not. If it’s bad it’s bad regardless the genders involved in the romance.
I will pick apart the rwrb movie, because it’s BAD, it’s a shit movie, and you can’t change my mind about it. Not only is a horrible book adaptation, it’s also just a bad movie in itself, several plot inconsistencies than if I never read the movie I just wouldn’t get? Why does Alex make his speech before even consulting Henry and then the king tries to make Henry deny it and hide it, even tho Alex already confirmed it? Half the e-mails didn’t appear or became lines the character just say instead of write (like history huh), so what exactly is leaked? Why are there so many emails leaked when they don’t even show half of them in the whole movie? Why is the media calling them “the Waterloo letters”? Where does Waterloo come from? The complete erasure of queerness? I have a whole post about it but I really really don’t get it. Why is Alex such a shallow character in the movie??
He hates Henry for no reason other than a bad first impression, which wasn’t even that bad, he said than he needed to get out of there, while in the book he’s telling Shaan to get rid of Alex, and even then, that’s not the only reason Alex dislikes him in the book. Alex has apparently no real personality, and neither does Nora or Pez or Bea etc Henry is fine, they didn’t completely butchered him like they did with Alex but even then, well I’ll blame this one for the lack of time.
If I criticize any piece of media at all, it’s because it’s bad. I’m not a hater, I try to see things they way they are, for example there were scenes I enjoyed, like what they did with the phone calls and messages between Alex and Henry (as if they were in the same place), and the delivery of “my life is the crown and yours is politics and I will not trade one prison for another” is immaculate.
No movie is free of mistakes and bad stuff, I also critique my favorite movies, like for example dead poets society is one of my favorite movies yet it still had questionable stuff, like the whole thing with Knox and Chris and Charlie’s racism.
I feel like real reviews should have both the good and the bad, since there’s always something good, I always try to find something good to say, regardless than if I completely hated it, there must be something I enjoyed.
It just really annoys me when people act like you can’t hate on the movie because it’s queer, or the other way, when people hate on the movie because it’s queer. This also happens with the book. People love it for the wrong reasons and they hate it for the wrong reasons too.
BY THE WAY
This is no shade to the actors, I think they did an amazing job (when they casted Nicholas as Henry humanity peaked on perfect casting)
And this is criticism while having in mind the time they had to show such a character-driven story, but I think than making it a movie was the first bad choice they made, I feel like it would have worked so much better as a mini series, like Daisy jones & the six
#rant#idk each day I hate it more and more#rwrb#casey mcquiston#red white and royal blue#firstprince#alex claremont diaz#henry fox mountchristen windsor#red white & royal blue#rwrb movie
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due to personal reasons i am now firmly on team “i hope aziraphale does change heaven for the better actually (going on the assumption that his return is as straightforward as it seemed etc”
like if the alternative is just this ohhh he’s so NAIVE and SOFT and so WRONG and he’ll have to LEARN A TOUGH LESSON etc etc nonsense then yeah 1000% go for it babe knock it out of the park
i hope choosing hope and kindness pays dividends. i hope the soft traits that made other characters continually disparage and underestimate him and his intelligence turn out to be his greatest assets bc i kinda don’t give a shit about a “toughen up it’s the only way everyone else knows better” life lesson for this character
(which like honestly a lot of the rhetoric is dismissive of the fact that persistent goodness in the face of an existence of disparagement takes great strength and that at the end of the day aziraphale has always been able to stand up in his own way)
#good omens#good omens 2#good omens spoilers#aziraphale#aziraphale IS in fact a dark horse#he is consistently dismissed and underestimated and overlooked bc of how he presents himself!#even crowley does this with him (not in any sort of malicious way its a sense of protectiveness)#(i am not here to get into how aziraphale n crowley treat each other in ways that are unintentionally hurtful id be here forever lmao)#the point is that aziraphale is smart and tbh he knows more about how shitty heavens treatment has been the past few thousand year??#since he's. he's been the one getting treated badly. that whole time.#anyway theyre both right theyre both wrong and end of the day i just.#i hate the concept of a s3 that equates softness and kindness with being wrong and naive and dumb etc#it does not feel very good omens to me idk man#so i hope that's not where it goes
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Luffy not knowing about Zoro promising Sanji to kill him if he ever ends up losing himself makes me go feral because that's something they can only know about. Because Zoro's respect for life and death goes beyond anything, and Sanji knows he understands. Sanji knows that if somebody has to kill him, it's him.
And I don't even think it's because Sanji assumes Zoro's opinion of him is hatred and it would hurt less for him to do this, but because Sanji knows only Zoro would be able to treat the promise as it is. Because he would put Sanji's wishes before any feelings he has for him. It's not that Zoro doesn't care, but I think he respects people's ideals and decisions to the extent of being able to kill Sanji if he so desires.
That being said, he'd do it if there's no other way to fix it. If it's either dying or living as an emotionless machine, which is the same as dying for Sanji, Zoro would fulfill his promise. And there is just... Something about Luffy not knowing. Their captain. The man they're devoted to the most as if he were their God. Luffy doesn't know. It's something only the captain's wings are aware of and the thought of these two keeping this from Luffy until the end is just insane. Not even trying to make it romantic here, but the bond and respect these two have for each other is crazy.
Maybe it's the poetry of it all, too. Somebody like Zoro, who has looked at Death in her face multiple times and said "no", ending Sanji's life, who wants to give in to death to not experience a fate worse than death for him.
#bean posting zosan this is so rare and weird don't get used to it sweeties#kind of tired of people jumping to extremes with these two btw like-#they don't hate each others but they're also not best friends-- respect is something they value even more than those things#they're not good for my mental health they make me go insane#this wasn't meant to be in a shippy way but idk if you wanna see it as romantic you do you bc it could def be#it depends on my mood#i consider myself a zosan shippers on random days#you could also say sanji thinks zoro doesn't give a fuck about him and that's why he tells him bc we know this guy's self-worth is awful#but i also like to think it's because zoro's views on life and death are exactly what sanji needs#luffy would try to look for a way to fix this and they others wouldn't be able to do it tbh#i mean if it ever got too serious i think luffy could do it but do you really think sanji's gonna make him go through that#if zoro has to die he wants to die by luffy's hand but if sanji has to die he wants to die without involving their captain#idk if that makes sense okay i haven't slept at all tbf#one piece#black leg sanji#roronoa zoro#zosan
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Sometimes I need the yaoi to be toxic and sometimes I need the yaoi to be happy. In this case I've been listening to Maroon 5 and
#heirs art#dead plate#rody lamoree#vincent charbonneau#rody x vincent#rodent#do I even use that one??#Also I dont know if I even really have an idea for this#its like an au but not really because I listen to one more night after my 8 hour shift and then let all my retail anger out via gay men#more of toxic au but the general concept is they like each other but they hate each other and they cant really leave each other#you know run of the mill toxic gays#has it been just me or do we say yaoi more then we used too now a days as a joke but its lowkey become the norm idk#Im chillin w it but its become apart of my vocab#anyway hate gay ppl (hits my weed pen)#They match each others freaks
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ALSO I am learning how to teach very introverted students, something my natural skillset as a teacher does not help me with.
#one of my greatest tools in the toolkit of my teaching (imo) is that I am unpredictable#I will turn on a dime and I’ll share a thought from the depths of my soul or back of the pantry of my random opinions#that will make them laugh or hook them and they want to hear more#with a group of introverted students maybe they love to see it maybe they don’t but it doesn’t work for them to become engaged#they get so quiet and so still#and not in the good way that kind of happens but kind of just in the scared mouse kind of way#BUT. this past week I kind of had a breakthrough#I totally wasn’t planning on it but the moment was right so I talked to them about them being quiet and introverted (gently teasing them)!#and then I said ‘but do you like it when I just stand here and talk about the book’ and they were like ‘yeah! kind of the pressure is off’#and then I said ‘oh! that’s good to know. because when you’re quiet it makes me feel like you hate me’#(not realizing until I said it that that was the heart of the issue)#and they laughed in surprise (i didn’t say it in a way where I was putting that burden on them in a serious way)#and then I said ‘yeah last night I went home like ‘omg was that a stupid thing to say about Frank Churchill?? no one responded’#and then they kind of shriek-laughed at me and they were like noooooo#and then they said what if we gave you a thumbs up when you were done so you know we don’t hate you#and I said that would be great#and THEN a few days later I gave them an agenda for our discussion written out on the board#where I talked and they listened (I called it discussion with myself) and then they had questions to ponder and things to talk about#with each other. and a lot of time. and THEN I cold called them (they won’t volunteer)#but by that time they were so much more relaxed and they knew what we were doing#so they talked more! and it was so goooood#ALSO idk if it was them#or me who had changed but by the time I got to lecturing at them again#I could feel the quiet warmth that I could not before#(the absence of which is what makes speaking publicly instantly a torture to me l o l)#and it helped so much! like. they didn’t say much (some of them did the thumbs up)#but I had cleared the expectations for them and for me tbh and it helped. I was not waiting for a response from them so in fact I got more#of one. and best of all I could feel them feeling both the warmth and the power of Emma a little bit more#it is starting to click. anyway this is so much but y eah#I’ve been wrestling with this problem a l l year. cracking it in December lol
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It’s so embarrassing and heartbreaking being in so much pain over losing someone while knowing they don’t give a fuck if you live or die. Your favorite person becoming a stranger is a special kind of hell.
#I fucking hate having bpd#while I’m at it I don’t understand the fuckin audacity some people have to say they love you and do horrible things to you#I feel so stupid#I feel so stupid for believing all the lies#but I was so in love and put him on such a pedestal that I just allowed it all.#thinking about someone constantly and grieving over them and knowing they’re perfectly fine and to them you don’t exist#I’m still in such a state of grief and I don’t understand why time hasn’t healed#it honestly feels like it’s gotten worse w time#I just torture myself but I can’t help it my brain wants me dead#it’s so painful I feel so fucking stupid#being abandoned with no closure by someone who’s your entire world#for someone they were unfaithful to you with multiple times (I don’t even know how many and dony want to know) immediately#like that was the plan all along#he took our cat hundreds of miles away and I don’t even know if he still has her or if she’s still alive and I miss her every day#I never loved someone like that and it feels like the heartbreak is actually physically killing me#i spent 1/5 of my entire life with him#I was my prettiest and had the best body at the time and I wasted it on someone who didn’t appreciate me#not wasted. it wasn’t wasted. we had some incredible times together#I’ll never be that beautiful again#and now idk what do so bc i can’t decide which is worse: being alone and isolating or loving deeply and ending up horribly hurt all over#it’s all just so upsetting.#and I feel so stupid for allowing it all#he knows more about me than anyone and he made me feel like he loved me so much sometimes and then did horrid things and it’s so fucked up#nobody read this I’m so embarrassed and horribly broken#it traumatized me so much there was so much abuse and pain idk if I’ll ever recover#I deserved it but it still hurts my heart#I was so mentally ill and sick I know it had to have been miserable to be around me#there are so many things only he understands and knows about me and I need to talk about them I j wanna b able to b there 4 each other#but that girl is so beyond insecure and controlling so. if I want to talk to who fuckin gets me I’m just fucked#why lead someone on like that for years knowing you’re going to abandon them the second it’s convenient
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hey so im not white
#spacie spoinks#lol#uhhh#thought i should clear the air about that#my family is from africa!! i have posted about it many times#although ppl who are new 2 my blog prolly dont know that cuz i dont advertise it#im also lightskin and draw myself like that so i get the confusion...but like. still#think about that before you send me hate mail i guess? idk#my wording on the post was based on me assuming a difference in discrimination between poc who are darker skinned#and poc like me who are lighter skinned who may not face the same things#b/c there is a big difference and it felt wrong to group myself with poc who will be suffering the most b/c of their darker skin color#yk?#anyway#instead of sending hate mail go drink some water and realize that we are on the same side here!!#i was also under severe distress when i made that post so like. of course its not gonna be 100% grammatically correct oml#some of you are....more upset about a typo than you should be#chat remind me 2 not make posts about political stuff theres racists in my notes again#always happens. jesus.#last post im gonna make about this!!!#have a good day!!#dont infight with each other#lift each other up an allat
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something good.
#hello there is something wrong with them !!!!#this idea has not left my mind for DAYS#and i stayed up too late working on it skdjkd#but this is a conversation i had planned#an argument after emile flirts with the waitress#he just wants someone to be soft with him T^T#and treat him like none of this happened#and estinien is like fine then. if you want it so badly then i’ll do it#and their relationship gets infinitely more complicated#they love each other as much as they hate themselves#idk if i’ll ever finish writing it but gosh western au itches my brain just right#ANYWAY#ffxiv#oc: emile jenidaut#estinien varlineau#wolstinien#western au
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spending more than a few days around your family and no one else truly does cause a certain type of madness. and baby they call me the joker
#ughhhh#travelling with other people after travelling solo is exhausting#wdym i cant just go do my own thing#what do you mean i have to spend this entire time doing shit other people want to do while i just kinda stand around awkwardly bc i dont#have anyone to talk to#what do you meani constantly have to mask more than i ususally do bc i cant look at all neurodivergent or queer or. unhappy. or bored.#or tired#im so tired.#ive got a couple of days in london alone thank fuck#but ugh idk#its just constant 'you should appreciate this!! not many people get to do this!!#cant have a real conversation. treated like a child the whole time. cant even swear.#misgendered and deadnamed the entire time but whats new there#constantly surrounded by people#constantly have to be performing happiness because otherwise youre called rude and told to snap out of it#cant talk to people because everyone interrupts or talks over you or doesnt hear you#cant go on your phone at all if theres anyone around. and theres always people around#constantly on the border of being overloaded at all times but you still have to talk to people !!!#its not even my family this sucksss#'come to england so you can sit in a pub for 3 hours while everyone drinks beer and talks to each other you cant join in on any conversatio#you cant do anything else and if you dont look happy to just be sitting there doing nothing then you get yelled at!! and maybe this is a lit#paid for my own tickets) but#im not. this isnt *fun*. im sitting around surrounded by someone elses family who dont know me and i dont know them#doing shit i actively hate all day#and i constantly have to be performing and acting like im habing a great time the entire time or im spoilt#even thouhg i. i paid for my own ticket here#man i couldve gone to japan again#'isnt england amazing!!" yeah idk it seems like it is!! too bad weve spent this entire goddamn time in some tiny village in the middle of#fuck ass nowhere going on walks that are identical to the ones at home#love to actually go experience it outside of the. one full day. i get in london
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Me, an aro/ace person: *makes Echo aro/ace*
Also me: *proceeds to make a doomed yaoi crossover-ish crackship with cyclock(a bad end friends oc) cause I think there dynamic would be funny*
(There ex's before echo kicked brud's bucket)
When your in a "weirdest pairing of ocs" competition and this is your competition (idk what the shipname would be):
Nah I just find it funny I made this a a thing and for all the people that started to follow me once I got into sprunki are probably a little confused
Ngl most of my bad end friends stuff on my au is for my ask blog HINT HINT PROMOTION LOL
This reminds me how I do need to draw Cyclock's boyfriend, Caleb (oc owned by one of my friends) at some point. Tho I do enjoy Cyclock x Echo astetically speaking (and funny lols reasons)
Even funny when I get into some of my bef lore with the sprunkis
(I would also like to confirm despite his looks cyclock is 17...kinda basses on the fact a lot of my male classmates have had beards and mistakes since sophomore like holy fuck guys-)
#they honesyly give me “you look lonely i can help with that” vibes#like echo's ghost goes to cyclock one day and pulls thats shit on him#in terms of there relationship it was probably an on and off one before cyclock decided to dump him for good#it was also a secret from the family so there probably not even aware#idk i like putting cyclock in messy relationships even tho his ace and gay#like i shiped him ironically with evil morty cause they hate each other and i thought it was funny#then there was with his friend thorn which was really more of a rebound for thorn cause he has a dead bf (now they can bond)#unless if echo gets revived and doesnt start the apocalypse part 2#i dont think they will work out enough to be end game#art#bad end friends#bad ending#bad end friends au#digitalart#bad end#oc#oc art#sprunki#sprunki incredibox#darkcult fan kid#crackship
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god i finally watched new episodes my honest reaction is jgiwoaoKzmxmkwkakkak
#it kinda doesnt feel real for me idk why#like i do not actually process all of it??#tho I DO have ideas and thinking i did pay attention#maybe i've just had a wild day i guess#but also oh god vex'ahlia broke my heart#twice#first time were when scanlan was talking how he couldn't be at two places at the same time to help 'em and she said nobody gives a fuck#i feel so bad for scanlan rn i love him#haven't watched campaing to the bard's lament yet but oh fuck im too spoiled i do know what happens where (a little bit)#the second time was when she said she really cares for percy i started crying at that moment#also im a lil bit disappointed cuz i thought we would get percys death and vex's spech but we got “i open the door completly naked” scene ->#and im very happy we got it like oh wow i didn't expect that#but idk im just a girl and i love percahlia's slowburn#since i watched 64 eps of actual campaign it become hard for me to not compare campaign and tlovm cuz obviosly its very different#but with percahlia in tlovm we don't have hours and hours of campaign context#(we don't have percy making her arrows)#and i understand why cuz 100+ streams 3+ hours each is one thing and animated series with 12 eps of 25 minutes is another#but as i said previosly it is very hard for me to not compare it#by the way i do think changes in tlovm make sense#cuz like?? i think vex is more sharpy in tlovm than in campaign?? like#like she punced scanlan in first season and in campaign they are kinda good friends and i really love them??#*punched#and i think she's more ?? bossy i guess?? idk how to put it into words but in my head it makes sense “i open the door completly naked” ->#goes earlier than “i shouldve told you its yours” cuz shes playing pretend even more than in campaign???#acts like its casual when its actually isnt AT ALL#and im glad percy said “what is it i want” to vex cuz its kinda like that scene in campaign when percy talked to vax#when he called them all family for the first time and said he's trying to find what he wants in life#i love percy and vax dynamic btw#i wanted to write even more here but apparently i can do only 30 tags wtf#they want me to actually write posts oh no. hate to put it all in tags but im too nervous abt posting on the internet
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actually stunned by how gay The Beatles has been all this time and I just never knew
#like its always just been there in my life but i just never paid attention#my university roomie was obsessed w them and had several beatles posters that i looked at every day#so stuff like the pictures of them from the let it be album are like engrained into my brain#and yet i never knew the lore??#nor did i know until recently that they were actually all high school buds nor did i know they wrote their own music#nor that they genuinely basically invented modern bands n using the studio the way they did etc. so all that was very impressive and cool#but THEN on top of that omg the angsty gayness of john and paul#like all i knew previously basically was that john was a thing w yoko ono and paul had a young wife recently#i had at one point heard of people shipping j&p together and was just kinda like wow i guess people will ship anything#I DIDNT KNOW#that they were actually like that cute and that insane together and that their song writing together was like an actual marriage#anywayz the old pictures and videos of them are just like jesus look how they look at each other i dont think it was just being bros#i am sort of in the camp of they prob didn't act on it for real but there was def some insane tension/chemistry going on#and then ofc once youre aware of this their songs take on so many possible meanings outside of just singing about their gfs and wives....#anyways i just have to vent about this somewhere bc im actually shocked at how this has just passed me by all these years#and it definitely was not on my bingo card for 2024 to fixate on the beatles but here we are lol#more proof to me that my ultimate fave trope or wtv is 'besties to enemies when really they actually probably wanted to be lovers'#gets me every time!!!!#whats been fun about this rabbit hole is how just every single one of my expectations has been reversed as well#i went in assuming i would like them best in this order:#(1) george (2) ringo (3) paul and (4) john#i was sure i would hate john i thought he sounded so pretentious and like such a douche#but no actually he is my fave one and it's literally in reverse order for me i find george my least fave#(i like his music and feel bad for how he got ignored in the band but i like him the least)#and then i literally am john paul ringo george in order of faves now#i just love when i get surprised like that idk it keeps me on my toes and keeps things exciting and fresh#and yes john is indeed pretentious and a douche but i didn't know he was also funny and vulnerable and that i like his voice and songs#the most in the bunch almost every time as well#the beatles#p
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when you say outsiders do you mean the book i had to read in like 6th grade for requires reading or is it something else? bc i remember that book was Great but also Not what i wanted to do over summer break
I do mean that book, and the 80’s movie, and now the musical which has rekindled my obsession
#also watching the 13 episodes made of the worst quality 1990s tv show on YouTube#worst quality in both ways#content wise because S.E. Hinton herself says she hates the show with passion and it’s so OOC#and worst physical quality because as someone on twitter said it’s like it was filmed on a Nintendo 3DS#it’s so grainy the characters all meld together#makes you feel like you just got your eyes dilated#and there’s like no other way to watch it than on YouTube#so that I’m just doing for fun because it’s so bad it’s good#I’ve basically spent the last 2 months reading every other Hinton book and watching the other movies#Tex is my fave after The Outsiders#one day I’ll see the musical#idk when but they gotta tour sometime right?#but yeah I’ll admit it’s not a fandom I thought I’d get sucked back into as hard as I did#im just such a sucker for brothers looking out for each other#I still have more plans for SOB tho so I’m working on it
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some of us r sane and the rest of us spend 5 hours drawing their tf2 ocs
i was gonna do more but um. no. not right now. another day mayhaps.
anyways i finally finished vampire medic and i also designed scene scout which was an idea i never talked about but ive had in mind for a bit xD yeah i hope u enjoy :)
#tf2#team fortress 2#tf2 medic#tf2 engineer#tf2 scout#tf2 oc#tbh scene scout does not look one bit like scout#which i kinda hate#but thats okay#i know tf2 takes place in the 70s but if new zealand is literally atlantis and there are fucking robots and modern day earbuds#than scene fashion can exist too. sure. why not!#i might draw the red counterparts of these guys#these r all blue team fellas#scene scout doesnt have a red equivalent but carl (engie) has roboneer and vampire medic has lovely medic#question for the medics do we do vampire and lovely yaoi or heavymedic . idk which id prefer in this case#idk . they could both be fun dynamics#vampire and lovely might be more interesting though since vampire medic is relatively normal and lovely medic is insane#so if you have any input on that let me know . its not rhetorical#anyways i need to make more tf2 ocs#there are no heavies#no snipers . no spies . there are 2 soldiers but theyre so hard to draw i give up everytime i try#1 scout. 2 pyros (3 if you count pyro bug). 2 engineers . no demos.#ugh i gotta make sure each team has at lrwst one of each class#i was repurposing my oc adrian into a tf2 oc because he is both french and carries a sniper rifle on his back#and blah blah blah sniper spy blah blah blah#anyways im yapping sorry. might go to sleep soon. kinda want to go eat first though#so im gonna go grab a cookie#byebye chat baii bai abibaba bai :33
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ngl gamers, I think I'm gonna inevitably lose to the hormones and depression in the near future XD
Can't bring myself to be active cause I'm using a lot of energy to not vent post all the time. But fuck it, into the tags I go!
#I want NO MESSAGES regarding this. let me just be upset and alone#you spend most of your life trying to not succumb to sick brain but honestly I don't think it's worth it in the long run#my life is for better or worse....decent. but I've lost the drive and happiness to really DO anything a long time ago. like whats the point#the only reason I havent killed myself yet is cause Im too lazy (and dont have access to a gun for a quick getaway)#and I'm saying all this DESPITE having stuff to look forward to in the near future. it's like AUGH whats the POINT IM always gonna suffer#why does mental health take such a toll on ppl. this shit sucks ass. and I still feel excited for things in the future too? somehow?#but I also really want to die so. idk man. idk. maybe if I fall in love with someone then I can be distracted but all my walls are up#what's the point in anything anymore. *I* have to take the steps to improve myself and my situation#and I'd rather die. anyways who wants to make a pact that once we reach 40 we will marry each other#that might be fun#also my brain has gotten so bad that I am literally considering joining a hiking club to get out more and I FUCKING HATE HIKING#but I should probably do something out of my comfort zone to push myself and who knows maybe I will find a new passion#but let me tell you about the anxiety - oh BOY it's starting to act up again. hahahha#ah well sometimes you just need to scream your feelings out in the tags to get a lil clarity from the brain fog#one day I will fucking die/kill myself but for now I'll just try to make the best out of. whatever the hell this stupid life is. *shrug*#(but hey if any professional hitmen are reading this. feel free to. heh. you know ;) )#also I need to get back to art#gotta do my paid work and that one pic I lined months ago. and clay stuff *continues to bed rot another week because hahahahahahaha*#ah I wish I didn't fail all those years ago. then I would be free. I wish I was free#ok goodnight I promised myself that I would do paid work when I wake up tomorrow so hopefully no more migraines -pray emoji-
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Sorry for being late today coming online, a lot has happened and I am trying to think about the best way to organize this blog going forward. For now though I will try to get the list updated quickly and read through my messages/@'s
#meg talks#mainly thinking about how best to spotlight people's fundraisers because so many are gaining and losing traction periodically#and some of my posts seem to get more reach than others#mostly what troubles me is i think that the more campaigns i boost the less effective it is for each campaign#i think that the small batches of donation matching campaigns that i organized with other people was the most effective thing so far#bc it guaranteed at least one donation to each campaign#i think i'm going to try to make other small batch posts too each day#like ''here are some campaigns that are close to their goal/low on funds/almost to the halfway mark or some other milestone/etc''#but idk. i just feel troubled and i think some people who have reached out to me think i have more reach than i actually do#i have less than 3k followers and a lot of them are inactive blogs from over the past ten years#ofc that still isn't nothing and im going to keep doing what im doing but im afraid people might be reaching out to me#thinking that i'll be able to give their campaigns more visibility than i actually can#im grateful that my master list has gotten some traction but the longer it gets the tougher it is to single ppl out#i don't know. if people have suggestions please let me know#for now i would really really appreciate volunteers to help w the donation matching campaigns#if i can have ppl committing to donating like 5 bucks to a handful of campaigns once or twice a month#then at least that's something that IS guaranteed u know... though i feel ashamed that i quit my job#and can't guarantee much myself until i find a new one#idk im just troubled and i'm not going to stop boosting campaigns but i hate the thought of getting ppl's hopes up and not delivering
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