#idk could have been bigfoot or something

[satansthiccasscheeksreblogacc]

Ok I have to say if your a monster and your gonna kill me at least with enough decency make my insides explode like if your a 6ft fish creature with scales and sharp ass teeth and idk muscles or something you could at least slide whatever the hell your packing down there into me or if your like a some humanoid monster peice of shit you could at least drag me into the woods and like make me start mouth open drooling all over myself eye in the back of my head and just like that's so rude of you not to like I'm not saying you couldn't kill me after just let me go down in pleasure and hot steamy monster sex

[the-hype-dragon]

I watched a very bad movie called Sharks of the Corn, and it got me really thinking about like, how do you know if something is just plain bad vs done in a particular style? because while I was watching it I was like, well this sort of reminds me of a Lynch or a Shyamalan movie, awkward "realistic" dialogue and lingering shots of mundane actions and all, but you know, you get the sense that it's deliberate on Lynch's or Shyamalan's parts because a movie they've directed will be consistently like that; and Sharks of the Corn switches from mundane dialogue presented realistically to action movie quips to zany buddy comedy skits with no regard for consistency, which I think it really needed to be able to consider it an intentional horror-comedy instead of a very clumsy parody of Jaws and John Carpenter movies

[honesttoglob]

Ok so few thoughts on the Season 2 Bigtop Burger Supercut:

- Apparently the "freakazoids" that Cesare and the underworld have been keeping tabs on are Cryptids. I had suspected the freakazoids in question might be demons as Hell is taking some responsibility for them but they're cryptids??? Man, that just makes me sad, leave bigfoot alone :(((((

- One of the cryptids pictured is Flatwoods Monster, who, according to legend, is also an alien. The other two appear to be Mothman and though I'm a bit fuzzy on this one some sort of bigfoot or yeti creature. He's wearing a lil stetson hat. Did Cesare use the stetson hat trick before?

- The second still shown in the credits appears to be Munkustrap descending onto Earth on some sort of spacecraft as the Bigtop and Zomburger crews watch. They appear to be in the same positions/outfits as when Cesare whack-a-moled Steve into hell. Which is????? Idk what to make of that. Could Flatwoods Monster have some kind of alien technology that they used to contact Clown World? Are we finally gonna have Clown vs Undead War??????? I wonder how Munkustrap will react to seeing other clowns in the pink-yellow-blue spotted outfit which Tim, Penny and Billie are wearing, which seems to be a pattern which all banished clowns are exiled in. Looking forward to see how he looks now that he's aged! Also, I like that this scene implies the Zomburger and Bigtop gangs stick together! Which I want them too! SO BADLY!!!

- As @fr0stmask mentioned in a reply on this post, the spacecraft Munkustrap is seen on is actually a tire, as in the musical Cats, cats who are deemed worthy are sent up to the Heaviside Layer on a TIRE!!! Thanks for the info!

- What if the Cats performance is literal, and one clown actually gets sent "up to the heaviside layer", and that's what happened to Munkustrap and how he got the tire spacecraft. Steve got booted out via banishment and Munkustrap was chosen to ascend, but in the end they both ended up in the same place.

- Frances, Conrad and Allen look visibly upset when they realize Cesare isn't actually proposing a truce and is still up to his antagonistic bullshit.

- The image of Cesare in his weird little Cabinet of Dr. Caligari coffin makes my stomach do little back filps. We've seen Tim, Penny, Billie, Frances, Conrad, Allen, and Steve all in their own homes (For Steve it's his truck where he sleeps) but Never Cesare! Seeing him in there makes me nervous honestly because in the image, his box/cabinet has two doors on its front, with no handles inside, which suggests it closes from the outside and he's "stored" in there and deanimated (seeing as his eyes are closed and this is the only time we've seen him at rest) when not in use. This would add metaphorical meaning to Cesare's comments about being a puppet vendor, as now that's all he is- a puppet. He looks like a little doll being stored in his box. This seems to suggest something I've long suspected, that the "1000 year sentence" Cesare is being held on by the underworld may be bullshit, and he won't actually be allowed to go on retirement. Instead, this idea of his sentence one day ending is merely meant to motivate and control him, like a carrot being held in front of a horse. Could that candle shown at the end be his lifeforce? When its lit maybe he's animate, while when its snuffed out, he's a lifeless husk kept in a box.

- You think Cesare's and Steve's footie pajamas have a similar narrative role? Like to make them easily identifiable as rejects (in Steve's case) or property (in Cesare's case)? You think they're just meant to be dehumanizing or a source of shame?

- Tim was the first one to find Steve, which makes me feel fucked up that Steve still doesn't know his name and seems to mis-name him the most :(((((( Tom and Toby???????? I mean I get that my man likely has memory issues, he's very old and he hit his head very hard on the ground and he refuses to go easy on that fckng juul

- Baby Tim is so cute and handsome I'm dying

- The alley Steve emerges into in the after credits scene seems to rememble the alley with the hole in the ground that Conrad recounts Cesare getting money from. Is this because the underworld was able to track Steve's ascent through the ground to Earth's surface? Is this the same hole Cesare enters and exits the underworld from?

- Also, Steve spits out some rocks when he reaches the surface. U think that's how he started thinking of rocks as food? They just kimda got in ther and he thought "mmmnm yummy!"

- Based on the timelime and my own calcumalations, Steve landed in Sweden, creating the crater which is now known as the Siljan ring, and emerged a whole continent over in North America (at least I'm assuming the show takes place in North America. The driving wheel is on the left side, right? And everyone has American accents? (Except Tim) Is that enough?)

I have a theory that Penny reminds Steve of his own mother. Both women have the same voice actress (Lindsay Small-Butera, my beloved ;-;), and in season one, while Steve is high, once he hears Penny's voice, he shapeshifts into his child form (which I think might have been the last time he saw his mom before she dropped him off at Christian-Acting Camp) and asks her for soup. He's even in the same Little Lord Fontleroy outift. Also, at the Food Truck Expo, when Steve sees Cesare approaching him, he hides behind Penny's back. Also, they have a similar appearance in hair color and clown makeup.

- Speaking of Steve's family, in the scene where Steve is about to be shot into space, there are three clowns who stick out from the crowd. One, with a haircut resembling Steve's mother's on the right (I believe this is her), Munkustrap in the center (at least I believe this is him, their hair and faces are similar) and a male figure on the left. I believe this figure on the left is Steve's father, and Munkustrap is either Steve's brother or past love interest (I think him being his brother is more realistic because him being Steve's love interest and sending him into space is I think too dark even for this show).

- I think the clown actors in Cats may only refer to eachother by their character names. Munkustrap is given no other name, and Steve being stripped of his name as "Old Deut" is seen as a big deal.

- I noticed whenever male clowns get old, their hair develops into sort of a tonsure style with a little dollop of hair sitting right in the middle of their bald spot. Peanut has this, along with Steve's father, and Steve is also developing this as well, based on the wicked widow's peak he has whenever his hat is off.

- bro I wanna see Cesare and Munkustrap interact so bad. What if they get jealous of eachother like, "No! I'm the only emo twink that gets to make Steve's life a living hell, who the fck are you???"

- I want them. To fight lol

- Cat fight!!!!!

- I may be stretching with this one but Munkustrap and Cesare just look kinda visually similar to me? At least with the black onesie and the dark unkempt hair. You think there's a reason for that? Or is it more metaphorical, as in these are just two people who have an impact on Steve's life in that they do their best to not let him fit in with the general society?

- In the still of Munkustrap descending from the sky, Conrad is build like a brick shit house frfr

Just needed to get these thoughts out of my head so they don't weigh down on my humors and make me bad at art and work and remembering to eat food and sleep and bathe and breathe for the next however many months it is before another episode O-O

[show-us-kaidenshenandoah]

i was watching the movie again and went "...wait a second" at the designs of The Gammas (or Gamma Mu Mu). i looked up trivia and couldn't find anything to confirm (or deny, i guess) my thoughts, so i guess?? this is a theory? (someone with a DVD/Bluray version, please check the Special Features for me to see if anyone mentions this. i have no idea) i'm surprised i haven't seen this parallel thrown around more but yeah, i think im onto something if this is a new thought in the Goofy Movies fanbase lol

sorry for the low quality of the image, ill type the transcript up in the post to make up for how blurry my text is. there just isn't a lot of pictures of these guys, period, much less that i could find of this specific scene so i could make my point

but yeah, my theory is The Gammas are all based off the classic villains in the Mickey-Donald-Goofy multiverse (plus Bigfoot, but i know many people noticed the redhead member of the Gammas is just "a shaved down version of Bigfoot" from the first "A Goofy Movie" lol)

(also, im a novice at learning about this extended Mickey-Donald-Goofy multiverse, im still new to the Carl Banks comics and havent seen all the media. so forgive me if im wrong at any point and please kindly correct me ♡)

so there's:

named: Bradley Uppercrust III — no idea if he is based off of anyone

named: Tank — based off of: Pete / Peg Leg Pete (but make him unrelated to PJ, basically) (hence, why he looks the least like his source, if im correct. he has a shirtless scene where he's revealed to have a farmer's tan, that i think you could argue is a very subtle nod that would have been slightly closer to a Pete-like coloration. but yeah, if im right, they had to make Tank's pallette lighter ao he wouldn't be mistaken as a relative of PJ's)

unnamed bearded member — based off of: the main Beagle Boys trio (Babyface) (Bigtime) (if you don't know the lore: there's a lot of Beagle Boys as the gag is they're a BIG family, but the main trio in the original "Ducktales" show is the first set of parentheses. the second set of parentheses is their names in the classic Ducktales comics. both the original "Ducktales" show and the reboot "Ducktales" show features both sets of the trio/s though. though the Carl Barks version of the comics preferred the route of "they go by their prison-numbers rather than their names". also, inbetween the two "Ducktales" TV shows, a lot of Disney media just merged the two trios into one kind-of-amorphous trio, as far as i can tell, like with "Mickey, Donald, and Goofy: the Three Muskateers". but still, they're part of a HUGE family who tend to be clones of said main trio. but i digress. they're a confusing family lmao rip)

unnamed member wearing sunglasses — based off of: the main Beagle Boys trio (Bankjob) (Bouncer) (i like to think his sunglasses (and i guess also the unnamed bearded member's glasses, but mainly these sunglasses) as a homage to the Beagle Boys' black masks lol)

named: Slouch — based off of: the main Beagle Boys trio (Bugle) (Burger) (also: im entirely banking off differentiating Bugle/Burger to Slouch and Bankjob/Bouncer to sunglasses-guy on how Bugle is commonly reffered to as "a hipster" and i personally associate fedoras with a similar type of crowd. i could have those mixed up tho, idk, neither of these guys even have any lines lol but i do like the idea that maybe the fedora is flipped like that as a reference to the Beagle Boys' billed caps? idk, that might be a stretch) (i would also like to mention i hc these guys are The Beagle Brats now in college-age, who are an unnamed trio that goes by "1, 2, and 3" in the comics but, from what i can tell, that the Beagle Brats in general (not 1, 2, and 3 specifically) were first seen(?) in the "Ducktales" original show (who also have a v small cameo in the reboot) that were meant to parallel the triplets Huey and Dewey and Louie; these specific ones im talking about the nephews of the general-amorphous-main-trio of Beagle Boys, but it is possible to call any Beagle Boy who is young a Beagle Brat. but, yeah, i have no basis for why i think Slouch and the other two are specifically the Beagle Brats 1, 2, and 3; that's entirely headcanon)

unnamed member that's a redhead — based off of: Bigfoot in "A Goofy Movie" (again, i know a lot of people caught this one lmao)

unnamed member that has black hair — based off of: Mortimer Mouse (who was once also known aa Montmorency Rodent/Rodawn, but they've been retconned into being the same character by now, but that'a a tangent.) (if you don't know the lore: Mortimer is a bit complicated to describe? but the tldr is that he's basically Mickey's love-rival for Minnie. to go more in depth though, uh, he's more wealthy, usually, and claims to be "in love" with Minnie Mouse but is also a jerk and she generally does not have any interest in him (well, unless the plot the writer wants includes a love-triangle). Pete is usually considered a more recognizable villain, so Mortimer rarely shows up, esp since Pete can be easily be written as also harboring feelings for Minnie. so sometimes shows re-write Mortimer from this personality so he is more distinct, sometimes as a toxic friend of Mickey's or overall bad influence but well-intentioned; so the character has some flexibility. but i know him best, as do many others, via his "House of Mouse" recurring role where he'd show up just to try to break Mickey and Minnie up or otherwise flirt with any female guests. i think he works well in competition wirh Pete, who has more of a Goliath-and-David relationship with Mickey when Mickey and Pete are antagonistic, as Mortimer is an antagonist that is just as clever and capable as Mickey (if not more so, since he is clever, competent, and generally wealthy enough to have more resources than Mickey) but does not have Mickey's sincerity or good intentions. though i dont mind how kid shows re-write him either, i think toxic friends and bad influences are good lessons for children to learn. i like Mortimer being a frenemy who has good intent but bad follow-through lol but anyway, thank you for allowing me this debatably-overexplanation of Mortimer since he's my favorite and also, uh, the only one here where #1 he isnt in the Goofy Movie series and ergo may not be known to others, #2 has a consistent personality beyond "bad guy in story" i can talk about unlike the Beagle Boys trio/s and their huge extended family of might-as-well-be-clones, and #3, again, he's my favorite if you couldnt tell lol) (also, i do think you could argue this unnamed character's quiff is a nod to Mortimer's mouse-ears tho, since there's a curve and all. and then the idea he has some stubble as a possible ref to Mortimer's whiskers is hilarious to me if my theory has water and he was intentionally designed after Mortimer lmao)

anyway, i apologize again if this idea has been discussed before. i really did try to google if anyone was spreading the same idea that The Gammas are just a fun College AU-Variant of these guys already

+ bonus, since i mentioned them, The Beagle Brats:

please let me know if you think the idea has merit, and especially let me know if Bradley is a reference to anyone (tho i can also fully buy Bradley being original to this movie!) thanks so much for reading ♡

ps. i am dyslexic so do forgive me for any misspellings. i am editing this unseriously from my phone ✌️

[lilbabydilljr]

Hi I’ve been wanting to post this for a few days but I’ve got no desire to actually write a description. But it’s here if anyone wants! Description will come later, I just dropped my boyfriend off today and I’m kinda sad. Long distance. Blah.

Download (SFS)

Info is now under the cut! Look at me go.

01/18 - If you use any replacement UI built off of Clean UI, please ensure either this package loads after, or delete the turn on images that Clean UI includes. Thank you grilledcheese-aspiration for reminding me! The two turn-ons effected are ‘Musical’ and ‘Neat Freak’ which were originally ‘Hard Worker’ and ‘Unemployed.’

So I will say I probably should’ve done these differently (turn Creative into Artistic as opposed to Vampire, but whatever. They actually started out alphabetical in game which I thought was neat. They’re still fairly close!

But basically what I’ve done here is replace almost all the turn-ons with personality/trait based ones. I’m wishing we could mix and match individual turn-ons actually because as I write this list I’m already worried about people thinking there’s too many supernatural ones. But they’re used in my game so idk. They’re much more relevant than full face makeup I feel.

For badges sims require a silver level to have the turn-on. For skills I’ve increased it to 8 points, and if a turn-on mentions a hobby, a sim either needs 5 points or have it as their One True Hobby.

Fitness/Fatness - New icons, unchanged Swimwear > Adventurous - 3 Vacations, Adventurous, Daredevil, Sailor Formal > Alien - Trait, Skin, Eyes Underwear > Animal Lover - 2 Pet Friends, Animal Lover, Cat Person, Dog Person, Equestrian Vampire > Artistic - Artistic, Avant Garde, Photographer's Eye, Savvy Sculptor, Floral/Pottery/Sewing Badge, Arts & Crafts Hobby, Creativity Skill Stink > Athletic - Athletic, Disciplined, Equestrian, Loves to Swim, Sports/Fitness Hobby, Body Skill Logical > Bad Rep - Negative Reputation, Evil Great Cook > Bookish - Bookworm, Film & Literature Hobby Mechanical > Charismatic - Born Salesperson, Charismatic, Natural Born Performer, Schmoozer, Star Quality, Charisma Skill Creative > Content - Platinum, Lifetime Happiness Skill (side note this one will be the first one to go if someone can come up with something better it is my least favourite) Athletic > Dumb - Absent Minded, Less than 2 Logic Good at cleaning > Foodie - Natural Cook, Cuisine Hobby, Cooking Skill Zombiism > Gamer - Computer Whiz, Couch Potato, Loser, Games Hobby Robots > Good Rep - Good reputation, Good Plantsim > Indoorsy - Bookworm, Brooding, Couch Potato, Hates the Outdoors, Loner Werewolf > Magic - Genie, Witch, Fairy Witch > Mechanical - Servo, Bot Fan, Computer Whiz, Handy, Vehicle Enthusiast, Robotics Badge, Tinkering Hobby, Mechanical Skill Hard Worker > Musical - Natural Born Performer, Star Quality, Virtuoso, Music & Dance Hobby, Dance Skill, Creativity Skill Unemployed > Neat Freak - Neat, Cleaning Skill, Personality Cologne > Occult - Werewolf, Plantsim, Bigfoot, Genie, Witch, Fairy, Mermaid Facial Hair > Outdoorsy - Angler, Green Thumb, Loves the Outdoors, Sailor, Gardening Badge, Fishing Badge, Nature Hobby Glasses > Plant Lover - Eco-Friendly, Green Thumb, Vegetarian, Flower/Gardening Badge, Plantsim, Fairy  Makeup > Productive - Ambitious, Eccentric, Frugal, Gatherer, Perfectionist, Workaholic Full Face Makeup > Slacker - Couch Potato, Mooch, Slob, Personality Hats > Smart - Genius, Logic Skill Jewellery > Stylish - Avant Garde, Diva, Irresistible, Proper, Cosmetology Badge, Fashion Interest Custom Hair > Timid - Brooding, Coward, Loner, Shy, Socially Awkward, Unflirty, Personality Charismatic > Undead - Ghost, Zombie, Vampire

Version 2 Added, Choose one

Fixes Fitness/Fatness names. Those were meant for me only!

Creative > Baddie - Daredevil, Evil, Flirty, Great Kisser, Irresistible, Party Animal, Rebellious traits

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s2 episode 24 thoughts

this episode was quite spooky. because cannibalism is real. but something about scully about to get her head chopped off and boiled seemed more outlandish than all the aliens and the guy that kills people with his shadow or even lizard man eugene tooms!

which is strange. because those things are pretty outlandish! maybe its because it was so much scarier than even evil lizard men.

let’s jump in:

so this is an episode involving more meat. did we need more meat, after the earlier meat processing content in s2 episode 10? many are saying no. but not chris carter!

we begin at a dirt road at night. in the state of arkansas. we have an older man and a younger woman named paula in a car, which is not suspicious at all! /s

oh and now the old man choking? is this natural or did she induce it with some poison. i mean maybe he deserved it, if she did. he takes some pills, so I’m guessing it is due to natural causes. now she beckons him out to the woods. 

into the woods. she says he has to catch her. is she luring him into a Bigfoot trap? we have yet to really see Bigfoot, and maybe he’s hungry. although Bigfoot is more Pacific Northwest than Arkansas, i think.

author's note: we tested negative for bigfoot in this episode :(

oh! this man tripped and is now surrounded by people with flashlights and very cool masks. get axe murdered, fucker.

back in DC! aforementioned fucker has been gone for 10 weeks and scully thinks the higher ups are sending them on a wild goose chase. “i’m not questioning the legitimacy of the case, just their motives in assigning it to us” <- damn, very well spoken by a rightfully suspicious woman

oh, but at the scene, someone saw a fire. and mulder says the fire is “supposed to be the spirits of massacred Indians” OH...

(mentally i was like, please do not be another scary Indigenous story episode. and we did in fact get that. sighs deeply. we can make things scary without making Indigenous people the scary ones! or using the trauma of genocide as a setting for spooky time! well, i'm sure you, dear reader, know that, so i shall not preach to the choir, but i will point out that these thoughts were going through my mind)

“these are only legends, mulder”, says a dismissive scully. and why is her hair looking excellent today. I mean not that it isn’t usually but damn. shoutout to the hair and makeup team.

the place on the side of the road where he went missing had a big fire! could be a bonfire, both parties thought. until mulder remembered a documentary he saw in college...

(hehehehe mulder spent college watching documentaries <3)

! MULDER LORE REVEAL ! wow it's been a while since i've gotten to format some text like that. he watched a documentary about an insane asylum in college and it gave him nightmares.

(and this may not be super relevant to his character, but to ME, it is, so i shall note it <3)

he's got the VHS from the doc all loaded up, and presses play on a guy rambling about a fire demon!! who was found in the same spot as the fire mark!!! dun dun dunnn 

(love the implication that he either purchased his own copy of the documentary that gave him nightmares in college, or had to go rent it from the video store. both are wonderful possibilities)

cut to arkansas. mulder is on the scene holding a plastic fork from the ground. wearing his silly sunglasses. lmaooo idk why they make me laugh. what a serious gentleman.

sheriff arrives at the scene. he says the witch’s peg to ward off spirits is normal there and also that the fire mark comes from illegal trash burning. and, as an American i am aware of how Americans love an illegal trash burn. but still. suspicious.

sheriff says the missing man george was chasing women out of town. lovely sounding fellow /s

wife questioning time!! he left her years ago. oh, but tea: the day before he went missing he was going to cite major health violations in the chicken plant! hmm... a cause for murder?

mulder gives the wife his phone number. also mulder is also looking very good today. but that is an evil voice in my head that ought to be silenced.

noooo, it's chicken plant time. no thank you ma’am, i would be out in the car <3

paula from the woods at work in the plant!!! taking mystery pills. seemingly in pain??

chicken cutting cam. oh, this is not for me! 

the agents chat with the manager, who says george was trying to shut them down. and while clocked in, paula is sweating. she just gasped in front of a whole bunch of chickens and some guy with very blue eyes. she sees a human head on the chicken stand and picks it up and throws it off. shoutout to this fake decapitated head and my best friends in the prop department for making such a funny creation.

(but of course, it was a hallucination, and she really just threw a poor chicken on the floor!!! his sacrifice was in vain... gone but not forgotten)

mulder is inspecting the chicken gutting operation and i've said it before and i'll say it again: he is braver than me. 

ohh, more chicken drama: george was filing a lawsuit about “line hypnosis” and it was dismissed before he vanished! he deserved to win. is there a meat processing union? there ought to be. but he was the only one citing bad health practices, the other 3 workers said it was fine... sooo what’s the truth…

“what’s that” asks mulder, who then gets shown the feed processor, and asks “chickens feed on chickens?” <- heartbreaking realization. many of us remember where we were when learning this information. i'm sure it will stick with him forever. and i'm frankly surprised he didn't know already.

NAURRR THE SLUDGE AND BLOOD nasty nasty evil

OH plot twist: paula is holding the manager with a knife to his throat… scully telling everyone to calm down. personally i would be not calm. she said “don’t get excited” but me? experiencing an active hostage situation at my place of work? i would be excited

NOOO the sheriff shot her and she fell into the feed conveyor belt processing… thing. sheriff i KNOW you are covering something up. you will not hide from me.

SHE GETS GULPED INTO THE FEED BELT THINGY GAGGG it’s giving the jungle by upton sinclair that caused many american 8th graders to confront the corruption of the meat industry

paula had gone to the doctor about headaches… like george!!! doctor had assumed the condition was stress induced. and they did have similar symptoms. 

treated them both with codine… ain’t that a bit strong?? this man doesn't seem to be a very good doctor, tbh. i mean i don't think the guy that works at the chicken plant to sew back on fingers needs to be an expert in everything but like. codine for headaches? umm girl.

mr. chaco of chaco’s chicken was paula’s grandfather… if i was a grandfather rich off of chicken money, my grandkids would not be working the processing line, let me tell u that much!

back to the agents: these two should not be looking as good as they do in a chicken processing plant. they had to really step it up today to compensate for the horrors of the set.

chicken man lives in a mansion. further evidence of corruption. paula, i would not have had you working in such conditions if i was your grandfather. there has been a deep wrong here, i can see already.

and he’s got a big hat and is feeding his chicken corn. not other chickens, like the feed he makes in his plant... seems he is aware of the ethical issues implied in his business. also, mulder with those weird ass glasses. 

cacho is going on about the subject of chickens. and how he built this town. he sure is taking an awful lot of credit for creating a town, pretty sure that's a team effort mr. chaco. he's also going on about how he thought george was trying to tear him down. 

AUTOPSY TIME!! rare degenerative disorder in da brain of paula. and scully has only seen it one other time back in med school because you can only really find it in an autopsy. nice work, doctor! <- i just typed “nice worm 🪱” so we'll let that stay for the added sense of whimsy it provides

but despite looking like a young girl fresh out of high school, paula was born in '48?! she was 47 years old. allegedly. this is not adding up. so they go on a quest to find her birth certificate and see what the truth is.

debrief in the car. so: odds are not great that she and george had the same very rare disease

during this discussion, our duo are run off the road by a chicken truck!!!! no! oh... he drove them into a river. mulder has shifted into rescue mode as the river is red with chicken gore. i feel someone might be distracting them and trying to get the body… (this was actually not the case i was just overly suspicious)

but more chicken drama: the driver had the same symptoms as george and paula! how can this be?!

“i just came up with a sick theory, mulder” (grabs her shoulder) “ooh, I’m listening” LMAOOOO this is sososo funny to me. yeah tell me ur sick theories scully you have my full attention.

GAG!! because it is both gross and shocking. her theory: what if someone put george’s body in the feed grinder, and then since it’s a prion disease, a chicken ate it, and someone ate a chicken, and it spread to the humans!!!! AHHHH! well that would be an epidemic, because they ship chickens out across the country… she glances knowingly, implying things could be very bad 

the river is filled with bird gore from the plant BLECH... who allows this??!! please say there are some modern regulations in place to prevent this being done irl.

mulder says he wants it dragged, thinking that maybe george is in there. and the sheriff is hesitant to do this. once again, i’m onto you, sheriff. i mean, a river full of chicken gore: it would be a good place to put a dead body.

and bam! a body is found. or rather. many many many bones. many bodies. and they are still going. damn.

so, we have a ton of bones. scully can put them into 9 distinct skeletons, one of which is in fact george. i love that she can do that, put the bones into distinct skeletons. she knows it's geroge from a pin in his femur!

“all of them share one, strange detail though” “well, they seem to have lost their heads” “… well, besides that” <- LMAOOOO idk why this was so funny to me... he really thought he picked up on something but he did Not.

here's the linking detail: all the bones are smooth and buffed like they have been polished. ??? who is polishing bones? it sure isn't me, i'll tell you that much. 

george’s wife is at the scene, learning her husband's body has been found, and she is sobbing. and the sheriff says “we’ll take care of you” now what does THAT mean? because it's not really sounding like the welcoming words of a man who is going to guide his neighbor through tragedy, and instead like there is something bigger at play here...

back at the plant, the doctor is mentioning another guy coming down “with the symptoms”…. omg. so this IS a known thing from the inside. mr. chaco knows but he isn’t doing anything about it!!!!! chicken dramaaaa goes crazy 

scully at the scene of all the bones, carrying a bucket of chicken. lmao. she is braver than me, for i would have gone vegan the first moment i set foot in chicken processing land.

mulder does some digging: 87 people have disappeared in the area in 50 years! that seems... a lot? and he thinks the same person or persons were responsible. he thinks they were EATEN!! boiled in a pot.

“they used similar evidence to prove cannibalism among on the Anasazi tribe of New Mexico” okay: 1. why do you know that 2. need to look into these allegations for myself and 3. Anasazi… that is the title of the next episode!!! what could this mean!! another cannibalism episode?!

scully is very sad to say that paula could have gotten sick from eating george :( girl I’m not convinced the chicken is clean put it down NOW 

cannibalism = eternal life? follow for more crazy mulder theories!

she puts aside the chicken……. good!

mr. chaco says “he’ll handle it” and george's wife doris arrives, saying she “can’t keep lying”… she says “she did it” (!!)

OH????? she... killed her husband? that is a bold thing to admit to.

“we’re gonna take good care of you”, says mr. chaco, which raises the question: are they a cannibal cult???? is that what he means when he mentions that he “built this town”???

now what the hell is going on. <- an interjection i stand by

mulder and scully are going to the courthouse to look at the papers and all the birth records are burnt!! doris calls mulder and says he’s afraid mr. chaco will kill her… they split up…. nooooo i hate splitting up!!! i watched so much scooby doo as a kid!

GASP! a guy in a mask like we saw at the very beginning of the episode is in doris' home!!! drumbeat playing while she screams…. overall, this is very not good, i wrote, referring to the use of Indigenous imagery for this murder, and also doris being murdered in the first place

scully at the scene of the murder ft. big ass flashlight. she gets in through the side door. gun: out. trench coat: open. looks: served. diagnosis: baby girl that could kill me, and i am respectful of the fact that she has this power yet refrains from using it on me.

mulder at mr. chaco’s house. mr. chaco has some… stuff in his home. including photos with Indigenous people and also bones. having human bones in your house, and especially on display, is not a good sign of ethics in play. and a skull. Oh! it says the skull is from a tribe in New Guinea... why tf does he have that. put it back???

at the back of chaco's parlor, we see a mysterious door. mulder is busting it open.

LORD ALMIGHTY, I DID NOT THINK THERE WOULD BE HEADS INSIDE??? HELLO???

so that must be where all of the heads that mulder noticed were missing have gone. they're sewn up sort of like shrunken heads. very spooky. once again, pour one out for the props department for such a creation.

noooo chaco is in the house with scully, who was investigating the call of doris. NOOOO HE KNOCKED HER OUT!!! this seriously needs to stop happening like i'm worried about the brain damage she is experiencing.

back to mulder cam. goodness. all of these heads. 

in a field now. doctor is serving some soup. to a bunch of people. who are eating around a big bonfire. do NOT tell me scully is in that meal....

she is not. YET! but he is bringing her over to be roasted. and they ate doris! chaco is yelling about turning on each other and how they were only supposed to eat outsiders. girl you shouldn't be eating anybody last time i checked. 

man in the mask shows up with an axe. and chaco is decapitated in front of scully. who is put into the decapitation thingy next. GIRL THIS IS FUCKED UP!!!

mulder on the scene, just in time. he shoots the dude in the mask.

“you alright?” he asks, brushing her hair back after lifting her out of the decapitation machine. my good friend, i would venture to guess that she is not quite alright at the moment!!! this will take an awful lot of unpacking!!!

sigh. but the tenderness of the near death experience. coming back to life in someone's arms. yeah i'll romanticize that.

TEA!!! the sheriff was the one under the mask!!!!!! i knew he was up to no good.

wrap up: chicken place shut down. unclear how many citizens of the town ate people. 27 have become ill with prion disease. chaco’s plane was shot down in 1947, and he spent 7 months with a cannibalistic tribe, and also he was born in 1902, so he was 93 at his death- so the cannibalism really WAS extending life. and we see some more feed being scooped to the chickens as scully says his remains have yet to be found. end scene.

HUH???? what in da hell. so what are we thinking kids…?

well, i'll tell you something: turns out i am afraid of cannibal cults, no matter how outlandish they seem! i guess when you get a villain or evil situation of the week show like this, you WILL learn exactly what kind of fear pushes your buttons. i can imagine almost nothing scarier than being led to the slaughter like scully was. seems a purposeful commentary on the meat industry, especially when taken in with the other meat episode this season.

so, if i were scully, i do think i would need to take a week or so off. but she is just built different than i am.

some things bugged me here. first of all, like i mentioned, you don't need to throw in Indigenous people to make a scary story. like is the thought of a bunch of arkansas cannibals not horrific enough? the scary was there!

second, i have not been doing a kidnapping count, but i feel that scully is getting the rough of the deal here. i believe in gender equality when it comes to characters being kidnapped. like, an even 1:1 ratio. why are we denying mulder his damsel in distress arc? does anyone think about how he would feel? how nice it would be to see scully burst in with a gun and shoot the fellow that was about to cannibalize him?

still, it is rare an episode actually spooks me, so i must give credit where it is due. even if it felt a little outlandish, your girl was frightened! scully needs a vacation now. i also thoroughly laughed at the sick theories line and his funny sunglasses.

it's funny to note, but i like the episodes that are either very silly and light hearted, or incredibly angsty the best. and that may seem contradictory, but you cannot tell me that one breath and humbug may be on opposite ends of the tone spectrum, but they are both objectively Perfect. i'll have to think more on why they are the best in my opinion, but i think honestly i would watch these two read the dictionary.

[bluestrawberrybunny]

Hehe. @briandraws and @shygirl4991 because you two seemed interested in these goobers. You can ask me not to tag you anymore and that’s fine-

Still no idea what their ship name should be, so if anyone has any ideas, go ahead and feel free to share them! ^^

Gonna be writing a fic for these goobers eventually.

But yeah, Kris is taller than Donnie. In the show, he’s 5 ft 6 (from what I’ve found. My god, he’s shorter than Luigi-) and Kris is around 6 ft 1, and torments him for this relentlessly.

So, some more general info about this ship below the cut because these dorks and consuming my brain rn. I guess kinda spoilers for the fic?? IDK. It’s more a quick rundown of the plot. If you wanna read the fic I’m gonna write blind, then ignore it.

Kris used to be a Purple Dragon, but sort of switched sides shortly after they started working for Shredder. He sort of became an informant for the turtles, having struck a deal with them so that he could continue to keep the reputation of being a Purple Dragon without actually having to deal with the beat-downs the turtles would give them.

Kris is a year older than the turtles, Casey, and April.

Before they found out that he’s a part of the Purple Dragons, April ended up having a crush on him during her stint of time hating the turtles after her father was mutated. But Kris wasn’t into her and shut her down quick.

At some point, the Purple Dragons and Shredder find out about Kris betraying them and beats him up, threatening to hurt his family if he dares to double cross them again, which leads to him fighting the turtles.

Donnie is confused by all of this and knows something is up, so he heads to Kris’ apartment, where he finds out that he lives with his elderly grandpa and helps take care of his triplet younger siblings (Mark, Ethan, and Amy (If you get the reference you now platonically own my heart)) alongside his twin brother Manny. Donnie then promises Kris that he’ll help him, and Kris sort of brushes him off.

But eventually the foot do kidnap Kris’ family (who had no idea he was a Purple Dragon either), and the turtles jump in to help Kris rescue them, which is when Kris finally decides to quit the Purple Dragons for good and join the team. All of this takes place before the Kraang invasion of New York, so he and his siblings are there for season 3’s events, and Kris joins in for season 4’s events too because my boy is going to space. Manny doesn’t get involved much because he is not much of a fighter. Although he and Mikey do become friends who begin shipping Kris and Donnie together once they see how the two interact.

April is ecstatic over Kris joining the team, and Donnie is now unsure of how he feels about the whole situation because he’s still having his bi awakening, y’all.

But he does have some rivalry with Kris, similar to how he does with Casey, although it is very one-sided. Kris just goes along with it cuz he’s grown to love messing with him.

But after Kris shuts April down for the umpteenth time (yes, she goes after him like Donnie does with her because haha irony-), Donnie realizes that he isn’t really competition for April’s affections. But he still keeps doing what he’s doing and having this rivalry with him, even though April has been completely removed from the equation.

Haha, turns out he’s bi and has a thing for Kris and this realization sends our beloved Donatello SPIRALING.

And to my fellow TMNT 2012 fans… remember the Bigfoot episode?

Kris is absolutely seething with jealousy towards Bigfoot throughout that whole thing. My guy turns greener than all the turtles combined with jealousy. He’s actually the reason Bigfoot runs away because dude just snaps of her for daring to get so close to Donnie and keep bugging him like that.

He eventually confesses to this once the turtles tell him off, although he does say it’s because Bigfoot was “being creepy” towards his “friend” *cough* crush *cough* and that it made him uncomfortable to see Donnie uncomfortable.

And, Donnie may be a genius on paper, but he is dumber than a box of rocks with this shit because he completely misses all the signs that Kris is in love with him. Like… my guy a bit stoopid and I love him for it.

Not gonna spoil how they get together tho.

But as an official couple, they are unbearable. Kris will annoy Donnie while he is working. Donnie will drag Kris into his science stuff and ramble about it for hours. No, Kris will not understand a single word he said but will listen to the yapping anyway.

Kris also came up with a stupid human disguise that somehow worked so he and Donnie can go on dates in public, although they do frequent Murakami’s place for the obvious reasons (although it was strange when Kris first showed up there since he was sort of involved in that first fight but had ran the second he saw 4 giant turtles come in and beat up his… coworkers?? They definitely weren’t really friends. Bro was a part of the gang for survival purposes only)

They are insufferable when it comes to PDA after a while. It takes Donnie a bit to get used to it, since… first boyfriend and first relationship, but once he’s warmed up to it, he’s all for it. Hand holding, kissing, cuddling, they even started calling each other those cheesy pet names, but only in front of others. Like, Honey-Bun, Turtle-Pie, Schmoopikins, all of those.

Kris brews Donnie’s coffee and will drag his ass to bed if it kills him. He takes care of 3 9 year olds. He can handle a grown-ass (sort of…) turtle.

So… that’s all for now :3

[knowlessman]

"shigaraki has become too powerful. we need to bring in the one person we know who can disable him from a distance." "you can't mean -" "I do. Contact Mr Smiley." (bnha s6e7-10)

I forgot Aquaman or wever his name is was keeping Eraser Head's eyes wet so he could stare at Tomura 'XD that's just, a thing. that's how this show works. that's just a thing in this show

"he even has all might's power and toughness" blinks in Magic player I wonder what those might be. Maybe like 7/7? or he's a 1/1 that can pump?

"'little brother?' I didn't say that. I don't want to be like you, teacher, I want to surpass you. my will is my own" yeah, I don't think you read all the fine print back when Super-Satan took you in. gifted powers from vague-talking benefactors have a tendency to not care what you want in the end

"Vanishing Fist" is a cool name for an attack. wonder what they cribbed it from (turns out they didn't, it sounded like something that coulda been from something else tho imo)

(midnight got got by mr compress and is telling momo to use a forbidden technique or something to stop bigfoot) hmmm. so midnight had yaoyorozu analyze her sedative stuff so she can make it? yaoyorozu's quirk may be a strict upgrade over some of the pros', then.

ngl, mt lady hasn't seemed to be slowing bigfoot down worth a damn so far. dint even try to get him off his feet, he was just pushing her ahead of him like a plow for the longest time

figures, acid girl remembered bigfoot from her origin story or something and it made her fumble the shot. or he just reminded her of it? not sure, I don't remember the details that well (could swear her origin story was literally about a "monster" looking guy just asking for directions but idk). anyway, kirishima to the rescue? like they do have that shared backstory bit kinda thing so like sure

…what the.

-- fucker just. …fuck is that called? gurning? yeah. mfer just won the universe gurning championship of all time out of nowhere. swallered his nose. and ears. and eyes.

(tomura got eraser head with the dart) I don't guess our guy's wearing dartproof shinguards under them trousers or summat? -- BRO.

-- BRO. when is this that kind of show

(OP starts up again) okay, get this upbeat… get this lewis carroll denver jam band shit outta my face, a man just cut his fucking leg off with a knife with one swipe, my man has a vorpal fucking sword specifically for chopping entire legs off and you are playing stuff that would sound too tame and mild and childish for fucking burnout 3. "lazy generation" wouldn't come close to cutting it for this shit, get outta here -- hell, what was he gonna do if it hit him in the gut? chop his entire fucking self in half? -- sweet from atlantis: "the catalog says this little beauty can cut through a femur in twenty-eight seconds. I'm betting I could cut that time in half"

"the giant villain is expected to pass through eleventy different cities on his way to wherever he's going" see, now they got sad twangy strings in the background, it sounds like "In the Woods Somewhere." this is appropriate music for the context -- also the kids really did go through all that for fuckall. : | apparently he can Tarrasque in his sleep or something

robotnik: "that one mistake will bring about your demise!" fucking cyclops with his stupid dinky eye lasers. and writers not knowing what defibrillators are for.

oh yeah, this episode's named after bakugo for some reason. writer really does act like he's fucking enkidu when he's just extremely simply a bad person, it's never gonna make sense to me

flashbacks of bakugo "helping" deku figure out the black whip ig -- wait shit, so deku now also has an ability called Float that just lets him Peter Pan. …or just levitate ig, apparently he needs the other stuff to actually move -- all might: "you're helping him learn his powers to atone for your past actions. but he probably never thought about it" these two make no goddamn sense. bakugo is still every bit as abusive, not only towards deku, but towards every person he interacts with, as he was when we first met him. he's never shown any trace of regretting being that way. hell, he also just got done spelling out that he can't understand that deku values and cares about other people, that that quality of deku's is repulsive to him. -- bakugo is just… is just wired in such a way, whether by nature or nurture or both, that he needs help becoming anything but several kinds of danger to other people. and he'll never get it, and he'll somehow continue to be portrayed as some kind of, for lack of a better word, "quirky" hero.

cyclops's cape is completely gone now, dang. is tomura gonna get a new one after this fight, or what? that thing was his whole wardrobe, now he's just Ben Swolo with wrong hair and chapped lips.

welp, here comes Super-Satan, Tomura, here comes your benefactor to take over the reins. toldja. -- (bakugo took the hit) there'll be no living with him after this. not that there was any before

"I finally got you" ah ah ah. if I didn't know any better, I'd think the Avatar Spirits might have something to say about that. I know you gave this power away, all that time ago, but it might not want to go back. it's got several minds of its own now

the villain team's hacker guy has visual on the fight? while riding on bigfoot's back? how shit is the good guys' tech if this nobody with a laptop can see shit and nobody else knew anything until bigfoot started moving?

"I need to ask sakuraraka why hawks killed twice" yeah because she'll definitely have any damned idea what you're talking about (did he die? I mean they kinda played it like he did but they do that a lot and it very rarely seems to take) -- "you're not the only one who's mad about twice" …what IS spinner doing here? what is his whole deal? does he have one? why is his sword twenty swords taped together in a pile, and why haven't we seen him do anything since like season two? at least, I could swear he hasn't done anything, for having such a distinctive design he's such a nothingburger of a character

"what are you going to do to me?" 'XD fucking nothing, the best her power can do is levitate you and you know it

oh goddammit, the next one's title is literally That Bit with the Gifs and the Hall & Oats Memes, the bit I been waiting for this entire time, but I just watched four in a row (four HEAVY ones) and I wanna stop. I'm just gonna have to save it and open on it (and Knife Girl's BS) next time

[lesbiantabes]

Yesterday I was so sleep deprived that I made the backstory of my wbb selfinsert that is a librarian that has a crush on tabes, but she doesnt notice and the bears are no help either

Because of the bears antics the city decided to open a library near the forest, so they can bother any poor person that agrees to work there so Bea Gutierrez goes to the rescue bc their dream was to be a forest ranger but is actually scared of animals??? so thats the closest it gets. theyre new to the city and had no idea about the bears, so they're caught by surprise when they show up to the library and is still willing to help them find whatever they need, which leads them to talk more to them, and starts to find them fascinating, like how is grizz always in the movie making section but the videos he shows them suck?? panda always sneak manga between intelectual books to imprese bea (they have to scan them anyway, and he doesnt get that theyre a lesbian anyway) and sometimes has to hide the nuclear books from ice bear bc she is worried based on his prior book history, like what is his deal???

bea talks about their dream bc is no longer afraid of the bears, so they mention a forest ranger that is a friend of them and that she can help them with becoming one!! Maybe!!! idk do you have to got to ranger school or something, nevermind. so Tabes shows up one day, and has no idea what the bears are talking about, but she needs some books about a new plant thats growing near her cabin anyway and since shes banned from the city its perfect that they opened this place!!

so they go to the library, and tabes goes directly to her research, bea sees her enthusiasm about keeping the animals and forest safe, and they just get this massive crush on her, like how could they not?? LOOK AT HER?!? the bears think theyre just excited about being a ranger too 👍 yup theyre gonna be such good friends (bea realized they dont wanna be a ranger, they just like woman in uniforms)

the days go by and no, they dont know why tabes comes here looking for books about bears, wolves and bigfoot??? every week??? and its not like they like her company and thay she keeps asking for help almost everytime

the poppy rangers are the only one that know about their crush (they got a relationship badge, yes this exist dont look up for it), so they suggest activities that require investigation to force them to talk, and bc they hate tabes ex aka ranger zao and the librarian is actually cool and kinda goofy which is aa perfect match for tabes🫡💕

and here is a drawing I made of them back in 2020 bc yes, its been that long??? I have it bad guys

[eldritchcircus]

I’M HAVING WOES

I have been struck severely with the urge to stop writing this second collection of short stories and instead write a completely unrelated fantasy novel? I do already have like 5 or 6 stories written including the 2 that have Grim in them, but I would like to finish the two that I’ve started and didn’t finish and at LEAST write the “story about how Grim’s big brother JohnTony was born during Hurricane Andrew” story and the “oh THAT’S what stole those paintings from the isabella stewart gardner” story (which... considering I came up with like 21 stories to put in the collection I’m still going to be disappointed if these are the only ones I write for it) but I just...

...look what if a hellish, post-apocalyptic landscape and a cursed knight and an insane wizard traveling through it to try to seal the source of a corruptive evil that has been poisoning the land, knowing one or both of them is likely to die, and also they’re both incredibly funny weirdos and they fall in love despite the tragic horror of their situation and they’re both agender in different directions and have lesbian body horror kissing and I haven’t decided how it should end for them but that’s what writing the book is for? What if then?

Only if I actually go back and work on the short stories like I said I would I could finally release the story of the blue whales who remember back forever to the death of god, and the hungryland devil-hog who dove into the wakulla volcano here in florida so he could kill and eat every devil in hell, and the story of a bigfoot who was made, like all his siblings, to protect us from something that no longer exists, and the story of a haunted theater where Grim tried to do the right thing a long, long time ago, and finally finally finally gets a chance to fix it?

I don’t have polls, lol, but I would like... if anybody had an opinion on which thing I should be doing next haha. IDK. Like the stories I’ve written will still be written if I focus on something else, but I also know what I’m like if I let myself get distracted.

[leseigneurdufeu]

Why did you hate Titanic?

It's not historically accurate. Not even counting my father's "hey that car only came out two years after the wreck" comments, many characters were not who they had been historically, I don't remember much but I have read at some point an article about Cameron being sued by the descendants of one of the guys because he had been a hero that night and many survivors wrote in their journals that they owed him their lives or something and in the movie he was a coward who killed two people to get out of the boat or something? Can't remember exactly but it's about the gist of it.

*sparkle emoji but i'm on desktop* sexual liberation! *same* this girl is so GREAT for ditching her whole family to go sleep with a guy she's known for two days top.

on that note, the general nudity and sex. I can get why it would be a very strong message to send to the fiancé that she's been drawn naked by her lover but a) they didn't have to show it onscreen, like Kate Winslet naked and all, I get showing the drawing if needed b) the whole "no no he was a real artist we didn't hook up when i came back naked he painted me" -> cue to the scene where he draws her and then they go out and hook up in someone's car (like wtf, gross, unsanitary, not your car, etc) c) kinda devaluates real nude painting (have a friend in art school who did some it's all about professionalism not a kink or foreplay like in the movie!)

the general message of "the poor people are happy, funny and nice VS the rich people are stuffy, snoby people who are unhappy, sexists pigs EXCEPT for this one new rich woman who is funny and nice but also challenges norms at every turn because otherwise she can't be a good person". At least that's how i perceived it.

to get back to my 2), because I feel like I need to expand on that one: the plot could have been good except instead of having a real choice between conformism, marrying a fiancé who is neat and nice but there's no passion and running away with the wandering artist, she has no real choice because the fiancé is the devil in the flesh or almost, he blackmails her family, he beats her up, he's got shady dealings with shady people (the heart of the ocean? can't remember if it's mentionned in the movie but this shit is a FRENCH national treasure stolen during the revolution of 1789-1790's and which was not found ever again so this guy has shady dealings) and he doesn't hesitate to try to kill Jake. So really despite all of Jake's flaws (like idk not being able to provide a future for her, being full of himself -but he's poor so it's ok! yay!- being a cheater and a liar, etc) she doesn't have a choice. And even where she could have had one (like... again, not sleeping with him after knowing him for two days, not using him to make her family rage, etc) the plot just makes her into no better than her.

On the note of the heart of the ocean, it is to french treasure hunters what bigfoot is to cryptozoologist. It's exactly as if Nessie had broken the hull instead of an iceberg and then it was never adressed again. Idk it just makes me vibrate in madness.

i mean yeah the whole plot, the nudity, french jewels reappearing out of thin air, the rich vs poor manichean dichotomy, did i mention the fact there are two actors (Theoden and the guy from the Flash) in there so it kinda broke the immersion but that's not on Cameron...

Oh, yeah, I remember.

The freaking "could they have both hold on to the door" debate?

It doesn't have any reason to happen.

Because Jake could have been on the door and rescued without a problem if Miss Rose here had not left the lifeboat where she was already seated to stay with him. Her stupidity (which, yeah, youth and all but when it has such consequences on the plot and it's not even adressed seems like they just didn't notice when they wrote it) costs the life of her lover!

The only way it would have been redeemed to me is if she really suffered the consequences after that. But we just learn that she leaves her family behind without telling them she's still alivle (which... fine, they're not the best. but still...) and fast forward eighty years, she still has the gem so we don't know how she had the money to live on her own after cutting ties with everyone? the big bad guy just kills himself in an unrelated accident 15 years later, and everyone dies death that are either stupid (killing oneself or again the fucking DOOR) or anticlimactic (of old age in someone else's boat, and to quote downton abbey to die in someone else's house you've got to seriously lack manners)

Also I don't like diCaprio's face in his young phase. I had a highschool friend who was always hyping him and all and I was like "meh he's not that good looking" and so idk maybe he's got a beautiful face no one could resist and that's why everyone's so stupid or enamoured or both around him in the movie but it really didn't work on me.

[surveillance-0011]

oh geez uh uh any w-3 headcannons????

Yes many tee hee.

Most of these r new/havent said before but I will repeat some for sake of not having to rummage thru tags. ANd the ones rotting in my drafts. Sorry for length i am. not normal about these fish

DJ (they/he?) is nicknamed Faith, and with the og japanese name this nickname would be Chu(ji)

Timpanist (he/it) is nicknamed Val, jpnese version would be Oo(shiki) or just Midori bc that's a bit more presentable name

The Cellist (they/she/he). Uh. I don't have a set nickname for them I usually just call them The Cellist/ cellisake I think they'd be okay with being referred to as that too. I've also called them Algin even tho that's technically not who they are... I've seen Blade as a nickname for them but something like Jr or Kid in reference to the whole "First Child" thing could work. Idk I'm indecisive ig they have a lot of nicknames

They are all ND

The Cellist and Faith started the band and Val joined soon after. Perhaps it makes more sense for it to be the other way around but I feel like with the Cellist being stubborn and more out there with their ideas that they'd initially forgo a more traditional instrument until they realized something was missing.

Val and Faith live together. The Cellist lives alone, maybe nextdoor w/ a lil pulley system between the two houses. Houses made during the Salmon Run are not really meant to be long term so this was meant to be a temporary arrangement to streamline their work but as you can see it's been some time.

Faith finds this nice, they were pretty much homeless and just couch surfing pre omega 3 and ended up moving in w/ one of them in their permanent ocean residences and they decided for the Salmon Run to keep a similar idea

Faith likes a lot of urban, cool culture. Streetwear, graffiti, hip hop and break-dancing... etc etc. They're also very tech savvy. Preferred genres r edm/techno, rap +rnb and punk...

Val enjoys an active lifestyle. Into travel, camping, fishing and more outdoorsy things, working hard, eating well, taking part in festivities and trying to give back to the community when he's not too caught up in his own stuff. Likes traditional salmonid music a lot but also pretty big on grunge and nu-metal

The Cellist likes reading and interacting with art that is like. "good enough" for him. Most of it is confusing or dreary. Likes coffee in the morning and maybe a small glass of scotch on a lonely evening. And being right. As for genres he'll go for whatever he thinks is groundbreaking in specific songs mostly regardless of genre.. but I feel he'd like rock. Probably post punk and more experimental stuff? Maybe folk and some classical music... idk idk!!! If anything it's mostly stuff like Trout Mask Replica...

The Cellist does however claim to not like pop music. This is usually not a lie but. She does actually like some of the Squid Sister's songs maybe even some stuff from OTH or C-Side. She would rather die than admit this.

I do feel like if any of them had to choose a favorite band of the ones we know DJ would choose Dedf1sh or Sashimori maybe C side.. Val would go for bottom feeders and Cellist would say uhh ink theory may be.. it’s good jazz music

Also uh Splatfest teams!

Faith: Scissors, Grub or Fun, Grass, Sweet, Milk Chocolate, Aliens, Gano- Power. and Vanilla!

Val: Rock, Gear, Fire, Spicy, Dark Chocolate, Nessie, Courage, Strawberry

Cellist: Paper, Grub, Water, Sour, White? or Dark. Bigfoot, Wisdom, Mint ChocoChip

They have all physically fought on multiple occasions. There's been at least one near breakup too

The Cellist's dorsal/hair fin is greying, their coloration is also a bit warmer than other salmonids

Val is not completely blind it its injured eye but its vision is fucked. It's also sensitive to light and sensation which is a major reason for the eye patch

They all respect each other as musicians and people and deep down they all care but they really do argue a lot. They're not really people who blend well together at all. DJ rebels against all that is mainstream and all they don't like and even stuff they're more neutral on for the hell of it. They kindof think they're cool for being a jackass but theyve also just become very callous bc they didnt have a choice when they were younger... and they kind of feel like they're still on the defense. Esp since the other two are more experienced and older and tend to treat him like a kid sometimes esp the cellist...

Val means well but he often struggles to take others into account. He's very goal oriented, a one-way track sort of guy who often acts more than a little clueless or even selfish. Not as petty or stubborn as the Cellist but he's got a lot of inertia. That and he's just... kind of shit at socializing in ways that don't piss other people off. Says a lot of accidentally insensitive stuff too. Comes off pretty intense to some as well!! And the Cellist. Well. Stubborn, emotionally repressed, physically and verbally clumsy... they are also a very sensitive person with a lot of emotional empathy where they kind of sponge up whatever vibe they feel, but they don't quite have the ability to act on what they think would make things right!

So yeah they fight a lot between these clashing personalities that bring out the worst in each other and other creative differences. The stress of the job adds to it!

Faith has an older sister. Val has two older brothers and many younger siblings. The Cellist is an only child which is uncommon in salmonid society

Faith is a Goldie, at least partially so. Val is a cohock from a family of steelheads and Big Shots and is extra durable bc of this. The Cellist is a Maws or meant to be one... he either did not complete training or retired due to his clumsiness...

All of them have healthy appetites esp Val and the Cellist

Val and the Cellist have both been in different bands before. Val was in a rock band that only lasted a summer when he was like 17-18 and then was part of a traditional salmonid music ensemble for a couple years before ω-3

As for the Cellist they’ve been through a couple different musical groups. They left most due to creative differences and not getting along with band mates.

This is the DJ’s first like. Band. Before this they just did solo gigs and posted stuff online

[musingdumbass]

ranty rant

ive been watching oz media lately, the reddit videos. and while i like him in general, sometimes he just pisses me off. same with most other creators, but i havent been watching too many others.

anyway, one of the things is that he either doesnt leave room for nuance, or gives a whole fucking field. like, i can agree that going nc isnt the absolute solution for every problem. but when you cant even acknowledge that it doesnt even have to be permanent, much like is said in the posts themselves, it annoys the fuck out of me. ive been effectively nc with my mom for a couple years now, and my life is significantly better. but im also not holding it as an absolute position. just, she has issues that i dont want to deal with, and i refuse to do it.

another issue is when he just plays off things as creative writing projects. i HATE that mindset of "everything is creative writing unless they give you a police report". OR, people leave enough vagueness so that they have some fucking privacy, as is said in many posts, or even, some people know theyre in the wrong and are just looking for something. just.... that whole mindset makes it harder for anyone to be believed about anything, and it usually comes from the people who claim to be for the people. idk, i just think that if youre in the position of reading stories like that, especially if theyre supposed to be true story subs, you have to take it more seriously. yeah, leave open the door to it being fake, but not letting that be your first and only interpretation. (specifically this is referring to the bigfoot prank story https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QGePWet1P8U ) yeah, the situation could definitely be fake. but holy shit it could also be very real. personal experience, shit like that happens fairly often. one of the biggest things that i think some people dont take into consideration is that different areas have different attitudes about things like that.

[strangerstilinski]

You may have received this message 3x because I typed it out the first time and RIP computer crashed then the second I clicked send and by God Tumblr crashed and so if it crashes a 3rd time you will never see this message but maybe you have it in your inbox like a bazillion times.

Basically the first part is yea I get small towns but a lot of the urban legend and crimes weren't talked about openly because a lot of churches in small towns Indiana. Also because people were superstitious as fuck and like there's a lot of Masons near my small town Indiana so you didn't want to say anything that could somehow be related to them...

Anyways more lore and infodump about Indiana because I already said some things and now my brain is itching to tell more: which also the majority of these was read in a book when I was a preteen about weird and creepy things in Indiana (and again this is the 3rd time trying to send this message so things aren't in the same order)

There's The Fox Hollow Farm murders about another SK like Eyler. I have seen podcasts do an ep on this but briefly listened and never finished.

Claypool murders. It was a hotel and in 1940s a woman got murdered never found the killer. Another woman got murdered in the 1950s, but they did find their murderer. Place may or may not have been haunted but it is torn down today. I've heard this one on a podcast somewhere idk where...

The ghost Diana at the Dunes. Dont ask me the lore because my family had more interesting urban legend. Because its common for people to go missing or fall into the dunes, well my dad told me the rumor he heard was that the dunes moved creating air pockets- but WHY did they move? And some people who "fell" into these air pockets said it felt like something grabbed them...there's something living in the dunes that causes the sand to shift.

There's 100 steps cemetery i think in southwest Indiana. There are so many different legends the one I remember is you have to count each step, or you'll die in so many days. But also you'll see a premonition of your death?

Vincennes is just a haunted town, everyone i know who isnt local who has gone there has seen or heard something especially on some of those bridges.

There's catacombs under Indy that may or may not be haunted.

Bigfoot. So many stories and legends about Bigfoot in the state park. Speaking of state parks, one is called Shades state park. I went one time because I had a goal to hit as many different state parks in Indiana...never again because there were ladders you had to climb. But it was called Shades of Death in like the 70s or 80s because of people going missing.

There's some small town that had a Wolfman. He like defected from a war or something and then got adopted by a pack of wolves and lost his humanity and became like them. I only remember reading this one because the townsfolk turned on him and locked him in the cave by blowing up the exits and left him to die and I thought that was horrific because I'm terrified of caves.

Which there is the Indiana caverns. Thats its own thing snd there are rumors im sure

One of the bigger cities near me has a lot where a murder took place and the house was insanely haunted. Like every person who lived there after saw things and went insane or got killed there. They tore the house down and rebuilt on that lot and it continued to happen. Now its just an empty lot.

Mermaids. Don't ask me how or why a landlocked state has mermaids in the few ponds and lakes it has. I say mermaids loosely because yeah there's the river creature sea serpent loch ness monster type of creature in one of the lakes but there is also the mermaids as the town called it that were a mix between actual mythology of Selkies and Sirens.

Also there's supposedly a turtle cryptid somewhere in Indiana and I just think that's funny compared to the rest

this was wild from start to finish 🤯 thank you endlessly for fighting tumblr by sending this in a third time, because this was the only version of this message that i received and i am soooo grateful (i was not joking when i said i wanted to search for creepy podcasts hehehehe)

also u easily saved the best for last bc a turtle cryptid???

[lavender-annd-lilac]

You scurry around the kitchen, whipping yourself up a hot chocolate

A HOT CHOCOLATE U SAY?? 👂👂👂

So like, if Milo is “the best”, why isn’t she making herself a cup of that instead of hot chocolate, huh?? 🤨🤨🤨

The past few weeks have been… Interesting, to say the least, from having the cutest little men accompany you to a giant monstrous man devouring you

Lmao reader really goes with the flow 😂 like, some people are picky I guess but she’s like I’m cool with anything from gnomes to Bigfoot!!

slowly make your way to your lounge room, prepared to watch one of your favourite Christmas movies

Your mind is too focused on not spilling your drink that you don’t notice the older man sitting in your chair

Reader has negative zero observation powers she’s literally this doggo

Ari’s hand lifts to his thick greying beard, wondering if you will ever look up

She literally walks through him and that’s when he realizes… he’s a g-g-ghost!! 👻👻👻 and that’s why she can’t see him 🙀🙀🙀

Oh wait this isn’t a Halloween story? ☹️😾🎃

“I never expected your favourite Christmas movie to be How The Grinch Stole Christmas”

Ok that was going to be my third guess, after Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Mean Girls

Your grip is tightly wrapped around your cup, ensuring the liquid doesn’t spill.

Reader’s secret superpower… She could be like the best waitress!!

Your brows furrow as the pieces begin to fit together, the outfit, the greying beard, the red hat with a white pom pom on top

Wait… is it Waldo from “Where’s Waldo”?? (Or “Wally” for some reason in the UK)

“You’re Santa?”

Me, a skeptic: ok if u are the REAL Santa, what did I write on my Christmas list when I was 8 years old and what colour crayon did I write it in 🤨🤨🤨

“Mmhm, and you’re my little hoe… hoe… hoe.” His joyous chuckle fills the room at his pun,

Dude u literally have the whole year every year to come up with better puns and this is all u got?? Hire a speechwriter or something lol

Slowly he moves to stand, but a loud humph escapes him when you land roughly onto his lap. 

But is the drink ok??? Did it spill?? 😬😬😬

The smell of Christmas fills your nose, warming your insides.

Ngl, this sounds like it could be an allergic reaction lol

“Now, what’s a little girl like you want for Christmas? I mean… It shouldn’t be a lot seeing as you’ve had my elves and even the big bad Grinch.” Ari’s grip tightens on you.

Lol I’d be like “I’d like a FUCKING RESTRAINING ORDER u peeping Tom😠. Or maybe a PS5? 🥺”

“I can explain… I… They…” Your brows furrow as you begin to pout, not knowing what to say. 

Lol she’s like what?? I wasn’t even awake for half that shit

“Don’t worry about it, darling. Now, what do you want for Christmas?”

Haha this is like when the server comes back to your table too early and asks what u want to order and ur like “ummm, can u give me more time pls idk yet😭”

“hmm? I am Santa. I can get you anything your heart desires. All you have to do is tell me.” 

Me: can we get another season of Rome??

Santa: …wait, u mean that HBO show that was cancelled after 2 seasons bc of budget issues in the mid 2000’s???

Me: duh 🙄what, do u like, not have TV in the North Pole???

“I… I want to be loved… and not just for one night but for eternity.” Both you and Ari can feel your heart speed up, how your breath hitches after you’ve spoken of what you truly desire. “B–But… If that’s too hard, I would like a pet. Nothing too big, maybe just something small.” 

Lmaooo, she’s like “ya could I get like an eternal soulmate?? Or if you’re all out of those guess I’ll take um… a small pet? Like a hampster or something?”

(Meanwhile, little elf Ransom getting scooped up out of nowhere to be gift wrapped like “hey, what the HECK? UNHAND ME! 😡😡😡”)

“I think I can do both, but only for you.” He spins you around in his lap, causing you to face him. “But, for the first one. You do have to give yourself over to me. It’s the only way it’ll work.”

Me: I don’t do handshake deals. Can we get this in writing? And I want my lawyer present with at least one witness or notary. AND I want all the original cast in their roles for season 3 of Rome. AND I want an executive producers credit.

“I’ll do anything!” Tears are brought to your eyes as you think of finally getting your wish. No longer will you be alone or unwanted.

Girl, u are literally never alone lol u have no privacy 🤣🤣🤣

“Anything?” You nod again. Ari smirks at how eager you are. “Will you keep Santa warm even after I’m done breeding you?”

Quickly standing, Ari continues to fuck into you as he lies you down on the couch.

Can we get a status update on the drink? Is it like on the table now or did it spill?🫣🫣🫣

“You’re going to carry my children! Walking around the North Pole, swollen and glowing!” 

Lmao why does this low key sound like a curse tho hahaha 🤣

It’s very god punishing Cain for killing his brother by saying, "Now you are under a curse and driven from the ground…. When you work the ground, it will no longer yield its crops for you. You will be a restless wanderer on the earth" 😂😂😂

“Everyone!” thrust “will!” thrust “know!” thrust “your!” thrust “MINE!!”

What do u mean “everyone”? Who the fuck else lives in the North Pole??? 🤨

and snapping his fingers, causing himself to look as good as new before he looks around the room

Ok this is some Sabrina the Teenage Witch shit. Like I would love to be able to get a wardrobe refresh at the snap of my fingers

With a wave of his hand, everything in your house disappears.

Wait WHAT?? Why did he take all her stuff? It’s not like this is an episode of what not to wear when they make u dump all your old fugly clothes 😭😭😭 what if she had like, sentimental items in there?

Me, 2 min later: ooh, it disappeared bc she was being transported haha

he lays you down onto his soft, red and green silk sheets and glances down at you with a soft smile.

Why do u need ur home to be xmas themed. No civilians are even allowed there. Why must u make it so tacky all year round??? 😒😒😒

Can’t u just do like some nice neutrals??

“Welcome home, Mrs Claus.”

Ok so they are like married now?? Hahah sucker, he didn’t even get her to sign a prenup. 😏😏😏

Girl, divorce and take him for all he’s worth!!!🤑 (U can still hook up or whatever when u drop off the kids to stay w him)

𝒅𝒆𝒂𝒓 𝒔𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒂… 𝑰 𝒄𝒂𝒏 𝒆𝒙𝒑𝒍𝒂𝒊𝒏

🎄christmas masterlist🎄

warning - smut, oral sex, sex, stalker behaviour, breeding kink, maybe a bad pun?, human reader, santa male, reader may be a bit of a whore, but I can't blame her, slight angst, slight fluff, maybe a bit of kidnapping? (but, like... what's really considered kidnapping? especially if it's by ari)

18+ only please, christmas present for you all but mostly for @royalsweetteaa, the gif and header aren't mine. merry christmas!🎅🏻

Warnings and Reminders - Please do not plagiarise, copy, repost/republish, adapt, or translate any of my work on any social media platforms, apps, or third-party sites. The only platforms I post my work on are: Tumblr and Wattpad. I do not own any character of any franchise (Marvel etc.) All my works are fiction and may be dark or triggering content: READ ALL WARNINGS BEFORE PROCEEDING.

You scurry around the kitchen, whipping yourself up a hot chocolate. The past few weeks have been… Interesting, to say the least, from having the cutest little men accompany you to a giant monstrous man devouring you. Your mind was fuzzy, wondering if you’ll ever see them again. Grabbing your drink, you slowly make your way to your lounge room, prepared to watch one of your favourite Christmas movies. 

Your mind is too focused on not spilling your drink that you don’t notice the older man sitting in your chair. His legs spread, thighs and bulge straining against his red pants. Darkened blue eyes glare at your small form as you walk in his direction. Ari’s hand lifts to his thick greying beard, wondering if you will ever look up. Not that he will complain if you sit on his lap and tell him what you want for Christmas. “I never expected your favourite Christmas movie to be How The Grinch Stole Christmas” A charming grin makes its way onto Ari’s face when he watches you jump slightly. Your head snaps up, and you stare at him with wide eyes. Your grip is tightly wrapped around your cup, ensuring the liquid doesn’t spill.

Your eyes take in his tight red and white outfit, subconsciously licking your lips as your eyes trail down his body, loving how it fits his form perfectly. Your brows furrow as the pieces begin to fit together, the outfit, the greying beard, the red hat with a white pom pom on top. Your eyes slowly move back up his body before connecting with his blue ones. “You’re Santa?” You slowly place your drink down, becoming curious about the man you swear you’ve seen before.

Ari chuckles, leaning back into the chair. “Mmhm, and you’re my little hoe… hoe… hoe.” His joyous chuckle fills the room at his pun, and you giggle as well, feeling your heart warm at the sound of his laugh. A small smile takes place on Ari’s face as the laughter dies down, and his large veiny hand pats his thigh. “Come sit and tell Santa what you want for Christmas.” Ari watches you hesitate, worrying your lip as you think. “Unless you want to be named Naughty.” Slowly he moves to stand, but a loud humph escapes him when you land roughly onto his lap. 

You look up at Ari, eyes slightly fluttering as his warmth seeps into you. A calming feeling washes over you as you take in his scent. The smell of Christmas fills your nose, warming your insides. “Now, what’s a little girl like you want for Christmas? I mean… It shouldn’t be a lot seeing as you’ve had my elves and even the big bad Grinch.” Ari’s grip tightens on you.

Your cheeks turn rosy pink, and you stare at him with wide eyes, chewing on your bottom lip as you try to think of an explanation. “I can explain… I… They…” Your brows furrow as you begin to pout, not knowing what to say. 

Ari grins as he watches you struggle, pulling your small body closer to his larger form. “Don’t worry about it, darling. Now, what do you want for Christmas?” Ari rests his chin on your shoulder, his eyes slowly closing as he takes in your sweet scent, humming as he waits for a response. Ari can feel you begin to squirm against his throbbing member, holding back his groan as you continue. His thumb rubs the exposed skin on your hip, “hmm? I am Santa. I can get you anything your heart desires. All you have to do is tell me.” 

You relax into his body, feeling anxious about what you really want. “I… I want to be loved… and not just for one night but for eternity.” Both you and Ari can feel your heart speed up, how your breath hitches after you’ve spoken of what you truly desire. “B–But… If that’s too hard, I would like a pet. Nothing too big, maybe just something small.” 

Ari’s breath against your neck sends shivers down your body, “I think I can do both, but only for you.” He spins you around in his lap, causing you to face him. “But, for the first one. You do have to give yourself over to me. It’s the only way it’ll work.” Ari stares at you with his big blue eyes, his gaze flickering down to your plump lips as a soft smile spreads across your face, your head nodding rapidly. 

“I’ll do anything!” Tears are brought to your eyes as you think of finally getting your wish. No longer will you be alone or unwanted. You give Ari a bright smile when he grins at you, his hand coming up and resting on your cheek while his thumb strokes it. Subconsciously grinding down onto the large bulge in his pants, feeling the pool of slick building between your legs.

“Anything?” You nod again. Ari smirks at how eager you are. “Will you keep Santa warm even after I’m done breeding you?” The nod you give sends shocks of pleasure straight to his thickening cock, the member nearly breaking through the material as he hardens. Ari lifts you slightly, pulling his cock free before settling you back onto his lap. A grunt leaves him when your soaked core touches him, “Aren’t you a naughty girl, wearing nothing underneath this whole time while sitting on a stranger’s lap? You were expecting this, weren’t you?” The shy look you give him answers his questions.

Biting your lip, you slowly begin to rub yourself against him. Soaking Ari’s giant cock, soft moans escape you when his thick mushroom tip hits your swollen clit. “Please, Santa! I’ve been a good girl!” A scream falls from your lips when Ari thrusts himself deep inside, not giving you any time to adjust as he grips your hips and fucks you down onto his cock. Your head falls back, eyes rolling to the back, mouth hanging open. “F–Feels good! So good! Please!” 

Ari growls, his eyes fluttering as he feels your juices soak his pants. His hips thrust rapidly, hitting your sweet spot perfectly as his heavy sacks tighten. “Good fucking girl! You’re so fucking tight!” Quickly standing, Ari continues to fuck into you as he lies you down on the couch. His large form covers you as he pounds deep inside your tight little hole. The girth of his cock stretches you perfectly. “You feel so good, darling! You’ll forever be mine once I fill you up!” Ari buries his face into your neck, planting kisses and marks along your flesh. His grunts and your moans fill the room, and the feel of your walls fluttering around him causes Ari to bite down on your neck before he grunts into your ear. “You’re going to carry my children! Walking around the North Pole, swollen and glowing!” 

“Everyone!” thrust “will!” thrust “know!” thrust “your!” thrust “MINE!!” With a rawr, Ari’s hips stutter roughly into you, his balls tightening, and his chest heaves as he cums deep inside your cunt. Spurts of warm white cum shoot out of his swollen tip, overfilling your womb. He continues to thrust until your back arches, walls squeezing and milking his throbbing member as your orgasm hits hard, your sweet juices squirting out of you and soaking his uniform. Ari falls onto you, trying to catch his breath as you wrap your tiny arms around his muscular body. He pulls back and looks deep into your eyes with a dazed smile. “You’re my good girl, understand?” 

“Yes, I’m your good girl.” He slowly pulls out of you before moving down your exhausted body, opening your legs so that he can see his cum leak out. He groans, his thick fingers moving closer to your quivering hole and pushing it back inside. He leans forward and takes your swollen clit between his lips, beginning to suck. His fingers thrust and curl as he laps at your cute little button. “Santa! Oh! Fuck!” A slap fills the room, and your back arches as pain and pleasure shoot through your cunt and up your spine. 

“Bad girl! No swearing!” He growls into your cunt, burying his face deep into your sweet honey pot. “You taste so fucking sweet! I get why my elves and The Grinch are so fucking obsessed!” His tongue and fingers move fast against your sweet cunt, and the groans that leave his lips add extra vibrations to his movements, causing pornographic screams to escape you. When Ari curls his fingers into the correct spot, black spots cover your vision as your back arches, your eyes roll back, and your juices squirt out of you and directly into Ari’s mouth. He groans as he drinks your sweetness up, not missing a spot. 

Ari pulls back, sitting on his legs as he looks at you. His greying beard is covered in your juices, and his hat has fallen off, causing his long hair to stick to his sweaty forehead. His darkened eyes peer down at your blacked-out form, a smirk making its way onto his face as he glances down at your puffy red pussy. Standing, Ari fixes his uniform, tucking his cock back in and snapping his fingers, causing himself to look as good as new before he looks around the room. With a wave of his hand, everything in your house disappears. Ari leans down, picking you up bridal style before disappearing back to the North Pole. As you both appear in his bedroom, he lays you down onto his soft, red and green silk sheets and glances down at you with a soft smile. “I can’t wait for you to be full with my children.” Ari gently kisses your forehead, and his hand comes up and strokes your cheek. “Welcome home, Mrs Claus.”

thank you for reading!

feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated.

[vagrantblvrd]

Welp. Finished my last run of the High Celebrant mission and didn’t get the exotic ship. :)