#idk I just wanna be more active but sometimes its difficult

[yandereshingeki]

sometimes i want to post more of my random thoughts and just be a lil more present on the dash but sometimes putting thoughts into words just takes me too long when im trying to be present in a moment

[surr3al1sm]

Just Dance Highscores I’m proud of

I don’t really talk about playing Just Dance on here because I play it a lot and don’t want to bother you guys with it every time but I just wanted to highlight some of the scores I’m proud of. All will be below the cut to not clog up your dash.

Disclaimer: Now I know that they probably aren’t the highest scores (or the hardest maps) you’ve ever seen BUT I still get to be proud of them (plus I have a coordination disorder so take that).

With that being said feel free to reblog and flex your scores on me. I wish to know them.

List time! Yippie!

🩷 The mega stars (aka the dances I dance to way too much) 🩷

⚡️Girlfriend - 13078 - The first song I 13k’d and still one of my favourite maps

⚡️Treasure - 12904 - I used to be really bad at Treasure compared to LooH, but they kind of flipped one day lol

While we’re on the topic

⚡️Locked out of Heaven - 12681 - The first map I actually took the time to learn the choreo for. Just need to figure out the tracking ig-

⚡️10.000 Luchtballonnen - 12810 - A dutch (Belgian technically) song. Probably the best K3 song on + and maybe even on unlimited.

⚡️Judas - 12699 - Come on, it’s Judas. Can you blame me for being proud.

⚡️Rasputin - 12699 - This is just what my (lack of) rizz has come to. Also may I refer back to the coordination disorder.

⚡️Levitating - 12566 - Si’Ha Nova my beloved 🫶

⚡️Can’t Tame Her - 12536 - LittleSiha, need I say more

⚡️Beggin’ - 12498 - I started out with consistently 3 starring this song and here we are now. Improvements people.

⚡️Disco Inferno - 12275 - I don’t care that its an easy difficulty: I have played this song exactly once. Let me be proud of my beginners luck.

🩵 The super stars (aka maps I am learning or am just mid at) 🩵

⚡️Therefore I Am - 11832 - This map takes a lot of coordination and balance that I do not have.

⚡️Physical - 11733 - As someone who was not active what so ever at the beginning of the year, being this decent at a map like this one is just pretty rewarding

⚡️Canned Heat - 11728 - It’s a Wanderlust song what can I say, we don’t mix well-

⚡️Dark Horse - 11344 - My friend had JD2015 growing up and the most I could get was 4 stars max when I used to play with her so this just heals my inner child.

⚡️Applause/Stage Version - 11307 - It’s an extreme. I am no where near properly touching extremes (like actually consistently doing them). Let me be proud.

⚡️Wannabe/Extreme Version - 11459 - Scored this while dancing against my Kpop friend. She knows the official choreo by heart.

⭐️ The 5 Stars (Songs I do every now and then and choreo’s I live laugh love without being good at them) ⭐️

⚡️Rock ‘n Roll - 10877 - I don’t know if it’s just me or if the tracking on this is just wierd but it’s the highest score I’ve gotten so far so I’m just gonna roll with it lol

⚡️Buttons - 10672 - This map is just difficult for me- idk why-

⚡️Bad Romance/official Choreo - 10521 - Slowly trying my best to learn this one. It’s hard.

⚡️Gimme More - 10421 - Agend D is probably one of my favourite coaches in the game but ngl this is one of the harder mediums imo.

⚡️Can’t Stop The Feeling/Danceverses Prince - 10051 - That I have beef with the smurfs choreo’s doesnt mean I can’t enjoy them and be proud of my scores. He’s just very fast okay-

Sorry for the long post again. It’s just a post I wanted to make for myself. Could I just have noted them down for myself? I already have. Sometimes you just wanna share stuff with the world okay? Before anyone says it 🤫 I know these aren’t the hardest maps out there. That doesn’t matter.

Again, feel free to reblog and flex your own scores. I love seeing people be proud of themselves for accomplishments!

[bandtrees]

Also Mingus. Of course

SEND ME A CHARACTER!!

MINGUS!!!!!!!! OF COURSE. under the cut lol

Sexuality Headcanon: bi :] it's ourple just like her. i don't think she especially cares for romance or ponders her sexuality much, but in less of an "arospec" way and more of a "forming human connection with her is a losing battle" way. i usually love arospec hcs and do see aro mingus somewhat often but it's just not something i really see myself.

Gender Headcanon: generally cis woman but i feel like if she learned what being nonbinary was she would try and release and trademark her own neopronouns and make people pay to use them. i do also see her being interpreted as transfem sometimes and i think that's a really interesting reading but not one that i actively subscribe to.

A ship I have with said character: ghghnmnnormingus. it's been really fuckin funny watching the tides change in the fandom on this ship - for a while i'd pondered it but never said anything, and then there was the time period where it was considered a weird cursed minority and i got vagueposted about it, and THEN mich came and singlehandedly pilled the masses and now its just, like, a ship. funny how that goes. but all of that talk aside, i just think they have so much potential in, like, every stage of their dynamic. the timeframe where norm's consumed by his completely one-sided obsession (/neg) with her is SO fun to think about, as is the idea post-canon of them forging a more normal relationship and possibly more. they're two of dialtown's most intricately-written characters imo, and it really shows in how layered all of their interactions are :'] there is so much baggage between them and simultaneously so little (with the point of "norm cares way more about her opinion of him than she even thinks about him") and it just makes the final confrontation of ch3 pay off so damn well. listen to nemeses by jonathan coulton it's THE normingus song to me. ⬇ SOOO ch3 norm @ mingus to me

A BROTP I have with said character: god her dynamics with all the mingling are so funny, i could listen to that group of people babble on literally forever. i wanna hear them talk about non-green related issues i want to hear what this room sounds like when its time to argue about, idk, taxes

A NOTP I have with said character: dialtown does not have that many options for edgelord proshittery but i have seen efforts at the one(1) they have. Unfortunately .

A random headcanon: always has some kind of headwear on, whether it be her trademark little hat or other ones she has made for her, or headbands or headscarves or whatnot. it's mostly cuz her head looks really off to me without the hat so i work in substitutes when im drawing or imagining her in more casual settings

General Opinion over said character: the height of dialtown's writing, her and everything to do with her. dialtown is already a good game but it goes from good to great when mingus takes center stage, imo. she's so interesting and also funny to watch - i think "seems silly but actually has deeper stuff going on"-type stories are best when the silly and the serious are tightly interwoven and you can't really distance them from eachother, and mingus is a great show of that as an inherently super tragic but also super funny character. there's not a word of dialogue she speaks where you don't get the impression of how pathetic and overcompensating she is, and that works both for humor and for sadness really well. i also like, in general, when typically "sympathetic" character flaws are played to be difficult or dangerous - in mingus' case her insecurity and desperation to follow in her grandfather's footsteps, and her compassion in wanting to be one of the only people left who still really care about him, it's objectively very noble- but less so when it becomes everyone else's problem rather than just hers. she has this in common with her grandfather 👍

[astarab1aze]

rping/rpc petpeeves for munday? 💀

i can think of a couple.

anon hate, as if we're not all adults here, to name one. the complete and utter lack of respect some people show toward other writers is just ??? it's nuts. another thing is activism within the rpc and the advent of twitter-esque dog-piling when someone doesn't get their way - most i've found either have good intentions and just get it wrong (sokay, we all learn) or are sort of using x cause as an excuse to bully and isolate people as if that's ever been okay or appropriate (bad faith; the 'cause' is a smokescreen that makes the person getting harassed look bad for defending themselves, which i don't and never have vibed with; i spent a lot of time in discourse circles and people who do this don't actually have any convictions, they're just being dicks because they know they can be and get asspats after). people who take things too personally too, because at the end of the day, this is a hobby and we're all human. we can't all talk to each other all day every day, it's just not feasible, and if it takes a week or more for someone to get back to you, it's most likely the exact opposite of intentional. i forget everything all the time, my notifications don't always work on tumblr or discord, there isn't enough time in the day in the first place, and like some i have children and am married, i'm severely time blind (i thought it was still februrary until last week) or otherwise have 800 different things to do at any given time. a lack of communication, at least from me, isn't ever personal, and i'd wager it's about the same for other folks too. sometimes i need to be reminded or nudged and i don't mind that as long as its respectful. yaddayadda.

also it's weird to me that just a couple of days or a couple of weeks of not talking or writing is enough for some people to unfollow, break off/drop roleplays, or whathaveyou. it's just...weird, to me. it shows an unwillingness to understand that someone else's life doesn't revolve around roleplay, and also impatience. i would understand maybe a month or so, but not anything before. my rp besties and i regularly take a few days, sometimes a few weeks to respond to each other's messages and there's no bad blood there. on this front, this is exactly why i'm as laid back as i am - take as long as you need to, i'm not going anywhere.

i have some probably unpopular opinions too, not just pet peeves, but i'll save those for another day. like if someone writes, idk, noncon, i'm probably not going to jump down their throat because a) i don't know them, b) i don't know why they're writing it, c) i probably never will, and d) i'm probably not seeing it on dash anyway since i block and filter tags. when i said this is a judgment free zone, i really meant it. it's not my place and i don't care anyway. write whatever you want? be it to cope or explore something difficult so you can understand it or something else so you can have fun. because i will, even if that's really just complicated romance with a fantasy backdrop. write whatever wish fulfillment and escapist nonsense you wanna write too, while we're here, because genuinely i'm tired of that being seen as a bad thing also. we've all written something someone hates for one reason or another, whether it be unrealistic or 'disgusting', so really all you can do is keep truckin' cos you can't please everyone and it's pointless to even try.

[m1ckeyb3rry]

SHSHSHS HONORARY MUTUAL SHUT UP IM SO HONORED!!!! Also @/i-am-so-strange you’re too kind!!!!! Hsjshsjs always happy to provide more bllk content hehe but also thank YOU for supplying us with that glorious art I really got a kick out of seeing that LMAO I’m ngl stressing hiori is one of my favorites HAHAHA

BRO I LOST IT AT THE YUKI MARIOKART!!! We’re literally being stalked it’s insane….yes Reddit is definitely….a place…..honestly I only really use it when I wanna see non bot reviews for things and occasional bllk news because there’s usually at least one chronically online member active whos posting the latest stuff….

LMAOOOO NO ITS SO FUNNY HAHSGSHAAH ok but that makes more sense I feel like it’d be hard to expand too much on a request like that!! I love how it coincidentally lined up with Isagi being difficult/not as interesting to write about though LMAO

Wait that’s a good point HAHAHA maybe your inner tabieitaken agenda seeped out and you attracted side character enjoyers (me)……is that a sign to slide in secondary main character thoughts /j that is pretty hilarious though……I mean granted I also contributed to the hiori pile a bit when I sent in that like…(wanted to put this note in here that I straight up FORGOT what I wrote omg let’s see how long it takes me to scroll and find that ask I could’ve sworn I wrote it down somewhere but the fact that I don’t remember exactly what I wrote down is kinda embarrassing LMAO)

LMAOOO no because I love the idea of building up ego nation and just leaving like idk those cheesy stories where the lore is like yeah our great founders/creators one day disappeared HAHAHAHAAH I forgot that the man canonically doesn’t do laundry or cook decent food so that’s true too I’m here for the long ride though if you do end up writing that at some point then we can truly become the fake ego nationals LMAOO

MEGUMI I love megumi too omg bruh the recent events in jjk are really not good for the soul someone bring back megumi and his shadow animals :( Ah yes very brief Yuta interlude LMAOO (pi slapped so hard) also SHDJSH GET OUT SHIN AHS MY FAV TOO I also really liked Kija too!! I’m still sad that they didn’t continue with the anime though I heard it’s because it was just promo for the manga? Man. Ok but being converted by content is a little too real it happens to me too often….you know what’s funny. I saw a tiktok roasting Karasu for being number 3 and then like disappearing and I remember saying to my friend “yikes I don’t even like Karasu but why’d they do him so dirty” haha. Ha. I have no idea how it spiraled from there but it was quite literally shortly after that moment. But yeah I’ve definitely been converted by a good edit or piece of art! I’m pretty certain I started liking chigiri after seeing some fanart someone showed me LMAO

No I have full faith in you….you’re cooking in Michelin chef mode…so take your time LMAOOO it really does make me realize yet again that no one is serving Karasu nation like you s2 bring my man some justice….ok genuinely crazy has me really curious like if we’re talking genuinely crazy via Mira standards I’m eyeballing something around 30k (don’t say anything to this LMFAO)

WHEN I TELL YOU I LAUGHED SO HARD “I’d stay downstairs when my brother has friends over” IS SO FUNNY??? I’m actually crying but also agree!! I usually don’t watch as much slice of life to begin with so

the oikawa thing is actually so funny as a running joke now but I think (I’m also not a hardcore hq fan nor have I dipped my toes in the hq circles on social media) it stemmed from people actually thinking oikawa was really mean…? Maybe?? But if that was the case I’m like…..he seems pretty regular to me….seeing people put him next to like Sukuna and Kenjaku though is so hilarious LMAOOO

“#unfortunately idt I am built for the sports manga/anime life” AHAHABAAHHAAHAH you really were in for it LMFAOOOO

The soccer dudebro side of the fandom…ah yes….you know sometimes I forget dudebros actually watch and then I’m painfully reminded by some power scaling tiktok…this is also oddly specific but I remember seeing Maddie on tiktok talk about how she traded some blind bag keychain pull with a dudebro and gave her Kunigami to him for nagi or Reo or some Nagi Reo combo keychain and I really thought to myself like wait dude bros watch and buy merch?? Then I realize it makes sense that he wanted Kunigami LOL

HAHA Honesty translating is so fun and gives me more opportunities to use the target language too so I got you!!! <3 Classic Otoya activities indeed….CHATTER X CHATTER CHEMICAL REACTION IS CRAZY guys we are devouring bllk itself we devoured kaneshiro now he’s gotta give us his seat as bllk creator!!!!!! And also ok good I’m glad LOL I didn’t want to be like rapid fire pinging your inbox and messing up anything HAHAH

Oh…omg…….wait I hope that all worked out ok for you because omg….yeah that’s so awkward and honestly sounds like a nightmare…..hoping you get some platonic male irls too!!! Maybe you just have too much rizz LMFAO well….at least you didn’t find out during the actually dinner ig!

-Karasu anon

LMAOOO idk if i follow you or not but trust i would if i don’t…you’re like one of my tumblr besties atp HAHAHA one of my elite employees 🫡 and YES that art cracked me up poor hiori was struggling

to be honest if i’m looking smth up or i have a question i always go straight to the reddit results…truly it’s the best place for research questions because you can tell by upvotes how accurate smth is and especially if you’re looking for an answer about the contemporary world it’s better to get answers from people who live that experience vs study it!! so i can never be a full reddit hater even if some sections of the community are horrific

HAHAH i think a more focused prompt like that might’ve made me struggle for ANY character but yeah it coinciding w isagi definitely made me do a double take…although i would def write for him again if anyone else ever requested for him LMAOO i just wouldn’t seek out writing him on my own the way i do w tabieita and nagi

LMAOOO i give off a general aura of side character enjoyment 😩🙏🏻 that was back when my blog was only nagi themed too and he’s pretty popular so i’m surprised i didn’t get more reqs for him too!! you can always slide secondary main character thoughts my way 😋😏 but yeah i just found it funny that i’ve gotten more reqs for karasu than literally any other character…maybe too it’s because once i wrote for a side character the people who are into more random characters realized i would write for them and came to req?? vs people who like more popular characters have a wide range of people they can req/read from so they might not even see my blog in the results compared to me being one of very few authors who writes longer fics in the hiori/karasu/otoya/etc tags…idk if that makes sense but it could be one explanation

no because idk if you saw the vol30 color spread with the coaches but why is ego looking lowkey kinda…like sure i’ll join ego nation myself if i must HFJDDNJSSN

OMG YONA OF THE DAWN FAN???? you are officially my fav person ever I LOVEEEE YONA OF THE DAWN I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU ALSO LIKE SHINAH BCKDNFJSDJDMSN WHY ARE WE THE SAME PERSON 😭😭😭 he’s my fav ever omg…besides him i rlly liked hak and soowon 😓 but shinah is my number one my bae my man 👹 forever hoping for a reboot of the show because from what i’ve heard the manga is sooo good and yona is such a well written fmc!! i need them to get mappa level animation and finish the whole show 😔 i’m surprised they haven’t yet it’s one of the most popular mangas i’ve heard?? i know SOOO many people would watch it if it came out plus it would appeal to such a broad audience because it truly has everything 😩 okay sorry for the brief rant i just love yona of the dawn i wish the fandom wasn’t NONEXISTENT because it has so much potential for fics art and analysis!!

i’ve learned to never say i don’t like a character because almost immediately after i WILL fall in love with them!! idek how i started liking karasu because after season one i could not tell you who karasu otoya or any of the others were (i did remember liking yukimiya though)…after i finished the show i was SET on not reading the manga because i thought it wouldn’t be as fun as watching it animated but the same mutual who convinced me to watch the show told me to read the manga and eventually i caved 😩 and that was when i was like “ok lowkey why is karasu so fine…” but it wasn’t until i took a break halfway through third selection to read epinagi that i really became a FAN 🤔 at least i think that’s how it happened HFJDJSN i don’t remember it as well as i remember becoming a fan of nagi (didn’t gaf abt him until i realized i was lowkey giggling at his scenes in team z vs team v…tried to hold out as a rin fan throughout second selection but it was impossible and then i was the number one nagi fan before i knew it)

i will not comment on your prediction 🤐 but michelin star meal OMG i can only hope it’s that good…truly i am doing what i can for karasu nation 😭🙏🏻 laying a foundation for those to come after me (aka his fandom which will surely grow after s2) 🤞🏻 i wonder what his fanon version will look like actually 🤔 are we going to get fboy tabito??? hopefully not because aiku and otoya are right there but bby karasu is a sarcastic dark haired handsome asshole who’s secretly a sweetheart so i do fear he’s going to be bastardized a la the itoshis a bit 😔 at least i can imagine him being flirty even if i do think he’s too much of a loser and undercover loverboy to ever sleep around or anything

i guess by slice of life/chill anime standards oikawa might seem mean?? like he’s nothing compared to sukuna/kenjaku or even kaiser but in comparison to others in the show he might be ruder hence the general perception of him being as such…no idea though 😩 i agree it is funny seeing him in the top villain compilations

LMAOOO I HAD NO IDEA WHAT WAS GOING TO HAPPEN TO ME TRULY now i’m in so deep but like i love it…the bllk community on tumblr is also rlly fun and i’ve made so many mutuals/friends because of being active in the fandom which has been awesome!! no regrets for sure

PLEASEEE the dudebros are awful but also hilarious to me like lowkey i love them because they simply are so unreal like NO ONE irl talks like that 😭 one time i commented on a bllk dudebro’s tik tok and my comment was the only one he responded to despite how many of his fellow dudebros also commented…tell me that was the most interaction you’ve had w a woman in weeks without telling me 😓 but also omg the chokehold that kunigami and barou have on dudebros HAHAH i’m always scared to say i like barou because i need to specify it’s NOT in a dudebro way it’s in a “he’s my housewife and i love him very much” way

PLS WE DEVOURED KANESHIRO FR entering destroyer mode now…watch out the tongue’s abt to make an appearance 😩

unfortunately i have a lot of accidental rizz 😔 one time i actually didn’t realize i was on a date (i thought it was a family hangout) until the guy’s mom told us she was leaving so she didn’t third wheel us and then i had to pretend i had a boyfriend so i could escape 😭 that was a crazy day because that guy knew i was in love with his best friend?? so idk what he thought he was doing there…anyways this time i just pretended like my father wasn’t allowing me to hangout with anyone so i got out of it 😪 unfortunately no matter how hard i try to have male friends irl it inevitably ends up with them asking me out and me saying no 💔 one day it will be different i hope 😩

[noveladhd]

how ADHD affects my social media addiction

Social media is the main enemy of my ADHD. Why? I go on my phone ‘doom scroll ’l till I’m either “motivated” by some random influencer, depressed because I saw a happy couple, or my retail therapy kicks in and I have a want for everything I see. I’ve already removed myself from tik tok but now I use Instagram reels as a different source of doom scrolling. I get fixated on multiple types of videos thinking “ omg I wanna buy that” or “omg I can do that let’s start right now” or “I wish I was that happy with someone” Social media I KNOW is the root of all evil and if I cut it out what am I left with?  my thoughts. My anxiety and ADHD both kick in and get bored so we find the nearest solution which resets back to social media and or whatever I am interested in at the time. It definitely doesn't help I have zero hobbies (but that is a topic for another day) 

Recently I have logged out of Twitter (x) because my ADHD decided to fixate on the concept of making moots and joining fanbases through twt. Unfortunately, my ADHD can not consistently stick to a fandom. I have rotated at least 5 fandoms in the past year because of ADHD. Considering I can't be active in any fandom for more than 3 months, it's been hard to please my ADHD fixation. It has gotten to the point where I was trying WAY too damn hard to gain followers. I was even questioning if anyone liked me… Quoted from the DM's with my friend; “Am I too autistic for this? Is there some twt language I’m missing? Maybe I’m just unlikeable? Idk I know it’s dumb but autism is tweaking that it’s not going right and my ADHD is keeping the fixation rn” After I had an entire spiral, on my break at work mind you, I decided the best course of action was to just take a step back and log off. This is the second app I've had to remove myself from because it completely tanks my mental, ALL BECAUSE my silly ADHD decided to hyper-fixate on the most random shit. I put so much effort into liking, commenting, retweeting, etc etc, and to see no results makes it extremely difficult to not be upset. I have no idea why my brain was like “omg it be so cool to make friends through twt” and its been fixated on that for nearly…a month but the past week it has exploded into something more mentally taxing. 

ALSO, in order for myself to get off of doom scrolling on Instagram or youtube I attempted to watch a show on HBO but of fucking course my ADHD was very uninterested in the hour-long episodes I INSTICTIVELY opened Insta and started scrolling…

Social media makes me overthink and get extremely obsessive. It is something I have to work on. Maybe joining another social media platform was not the best idea but I believe this is a better decision. If you relate tell me about it cause I sometimes feel slightly insane for how I act on my ADHD fixations…

[pokefanbri]

I've always been open about this but not by much. I just keep it to myself due to ridicule from friends or family, idk how the public would react. I was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia in 2009 when I was 19 years old. My auditory "hallucinations". Would drive anyone mad being that I've been dealing with it for 16 yrs now. It's always been like a quest on just trying to find out where it comes from or who it is, the source of these disembodied voices in my mind. Whether spirits, angels, someone on the other side of the 🌎, or demons cuz they be lurking. And now into my 30s have evolved into visual hallucinations. A mystery that I wanna know too. There is a research facility at the U of A here in Tucson that involves psychic activity research that I would love to check out.

I held it together while dealing with hard challenges in life, it's difficult to cope with. At first the voices were so loud that music with headphones wasn't able to drown it out. But as I grow, & come closer to God, it becomes a gift and easier to control. Since the bad was washed away, it's become a part of me. I have been baptized 3 times in my life so far cuz sometimes being a good girl I slip lol & nobody is perfect. However after each baptism I get this euphoric feeling and I know that I'm surrounded by angels and I feel like the veil has been lifted it's really cool. I believe I'm connected somehow to Him & the angels. But the darkness still lurks around every corner. I feel evil presences I even hear them talking to me but of course I talk back with attitude when I probably shouldn't. Things tapping on my closet door I even imagine being dragged under my bed. I've saved my mom's apartment and it just made things worse for a time. I saw advice from Christian friends and even my pastor and they have told me that when you try to get rid of a demon they just bring more especially when you're not qualified to cleanse.

The more difficult the challenge, the more unhappy I am, the more I want to die. But God has gotten me through a lot, He can get me through it all I know it. But I also know I can't just play into the devil's hands, let his demons win messing with my head & emotions, I know better now

Its a long story, since 09 the bad took over but owned it since discovering my faith. 😈 may still wanna get at me & hate me w/a passion, which is explains my terrible life he must hate my ass. But God's power & light is so much greater, & protected w/the ✝️ on my chest, 😈 can try 😒

" paranoid schizophrenia" by doctors. But I know what I'm hearing. No friends or family ever believes me or wants to hear it, so I suffer in silence. It's just a matter of finding out what it is & the source. I have foresight in precognitive dreams ie Deja Vu since I was 4, Im sure alot of people have that but for me it can be frequent & never make amy sense as its visions of random happenings in my life weeks or months in advance. I have rare visions whilst awake of which God shows me, like when I meditated & spoke to Him before my babtism which I thought was pretty cool. I've been known to have telepathy with others & has been a cool experiment with other spiritual friends, & automatic writing to where the pen writes itself while holding it loosely.

"Schizophrenic" since 09 but Supernatural things happening for quite a while, & just evolving since. I'd get help for this issuse but idk how or where to start, sorta self taught. Doctors just want me to suppress it, but my new doc said if it makes me happy I don't have to.

It is conflicting with my faith cuz I know the Bible says beware of psychics & magicians in the same verse. We aren't supposed to know all mysteries in the universe cuz faith. But what happens when one of those mysteries involves you, wouldn't you wanna know? What if God chose u for something? What if it's a miracle?

And what if it's not exactly psychic activity per se. Cuz all God's children are prophets of the Lord. The signs are happening now of the end of days & the children are seeing visions of the end, I had 1 myself. When you're childlike u inherit the kingdom of heaven. He's warned us plenty of times.

Maybe it's easier than we think. Maybe, it doesn't have to be so complicated. Maybe He's easing us into it & Revelations isn't as horrific as it seemed in the Bible, but did its job into putting the fear of God into me lol. Life's too short, but what do I do with it, where do I go from here? After all the hell I've been through, & I'm still at entry level jobs with just customer service options. What if, more than 1 Angel is here, more than 2 or 3, chillin til it happens, & we live our lives while we can before it's all gone. I've met Gabriel, he's a pretty awesome dude, curly blonde hair, walks with a staff & like his wings are too heavy for him lol. Just doing his thing being the messenger of God, however flawed like us all.

We just don't know. Maybe we'll never know, & even with our faith we still try to peice it all together like a puzzle til it fits, as humans do being naturally curious. My grandpa was a code breaker in the war, I kinda take after him that way. I'm very wise & I do like to decode in a way. We just gotta Believe, be ready for anything & to go home.

How did I start talking about my issuse & gifts, & it ends up becoming Biblical 😂 that always happens I get riled up & the holy spirit kinda just takes over lol. Yo just Believe aight. Trust me, I've experienced miracles myself, He keeps me afloat. Yes I may come off as crazy, but a lot of girls are technically lol

Mark 9:23

Must add we have free will & it shouldn't condemn us regardless of some choices, if God has a purpose for us let it be. Bible tho it's all truth, is outdated, they wrote it from during that time & how they could describe things from that period. Jesus took in misfits like us ✝️

He understands us completely. I don't like to say idolize either regarding celebs, it's adore or is a role model. Cuz of the outdatedness of the Bible I personally just like to focus on the stories of Jesus or Revelations, psalms & Proverbs is good too. He loves us so much ✝️

The start of this post I was crying so hard 😭 like I usually do due to severe depression. But now I'm as light as a feather, now I feel so much better ty God. My past has broken me quite a bit & even my family sucks so much that I pray for a new 1. My name partially means "high" & I wish I has bud rn lol.

Origionally this was on twitter however I realized that it doesn't belong there because it's too long. Made for a blog anyway I have a bad habit of typing too much. I was working on a book & like an idiot I lost all my things in Vegas including my flash drive with my life story on it, that's not finished yet. But I knew I still had it on my laptop at home. Vegas would make for some good chapters lol gotta get around to writing again.

[pikawarrior]

how does this magic system work pls

Okay here we go, I'm making about 50% of the stuff on the spot cuz im still in the "throwing things at the wall and deconstructing what sticks so i may possibly add it" stage and need some time to get something completely solid

Under the cut again cuz this long long

Here's some world info thats important, we are ignoring the other universes rn since they are completely their own thing that just happens to crossover sometimes.

Everyone is born with magic in someway. Some are directly born with powers, like for example Adara is born with her fire abilities.

And the rest are just born with the ability to use magic. They have magic in them but need to learn spells and possibly use magical items to be able to use said magic.

People like Adara can still learn other types of magic and stuff but it is very difficult since their natural abilities take priority. Things like the wedding ritual Adara and Light performed at their wedding allows them to use some of their spouse(s)' powers if they have natural abilities, plus it'll amplify their own abilities. If they dont have natural abilities (or if they similar abilities like two fire users wed) it'll just amplify them and nothing else.

There is three "levels" to this world and they worked kinda like the hidden city in rottmnt. (Tho also im still in the middle of watching rise so dont know all the details about the hidden city yet)

Level one - 20% magic area. Closet the normal human world we live in but there are a small select group of people who actively practice magic. The rest are either unaware of their magic potential, just dont use said magic, or know about but want gone and stuff. Tech here is like ours but better? Idk how to describe and word it.

Level two - 50-70% magic area. This is where Adara and her family live (or lived in Adara's case). Used to be like level one but over the years stigma against magic kinda died out and people have mostly accepted magic and use it in their day to day life. Tech wise they're about in like 2014, magic takes priority but technology developments are still happening at reasonable if not a bit slow pace.

Level three - 90-100% magic area.

Magic is everywhere. The people use magic in their everyday life. They lack the tech of the modern era as they rely on magic more. Technology developments are slow, most new developments are focused on lessen the amount of magic used for certain things and stuff. Tech wise they are like the average like fantasy world with slightly outdated modern tech mixed in.

Now for the proper magic system. This is were i start kinda just tossing thingd out there.

Limits, the average untrained person could use their magic non stop for about a day before feeling any side effects but its different for everyone. Side effects mainly depend on how you are using your magic and what possible spells and stuff you are using.

Side effects include:

- Weakness

- Headaches

- Joint pain

- Vomiting, anything from blood to frogs

- General Sickness

- Hallucinations if you really decide you wanna do some curses and stuff

And more I'm not gonna list rn cuz this is already long, but the basic idea is think of the consequences would you get for overdoing normal stuff but tie it magic. Idk that makes sense but different magic will cause different side effects but over due it and possibly important body thing loss or death.

I tend to for side of effects to just reflect the action(s) taken but up the severity or change the specific way it shows.

As for specific powers, i dont have anything concrete other then Adara and her family's fire powers, Light (and the dad of two of Adara's sisters) shadow based powers, and Em's light based powers.

Other common abilities like ice and stuff are here but nothing outside of that currently. Tho I am interested to see how wild I can go without being too overpowered, bland, or out of place.

Same goes for spells, most common ones you can think of are here. Still wondering the details and stuff but for right now imagine the owl house mixed with like uhhh as of typing this I'm blanking of other shows and stuff with magic, maybe TOH with Fairytail??? Again still not completely set in stone

I'm gonna end this here for now since alot of details are still in the works.

Hope this all makes sense! And was enjoy, if ya got any ideas feel free to share there!!

[tranquilspot]

John: Combine fake arms with cake.

It's, kinda funny I guess? Now that I think about it, John's type of humor is a mix between absurdist and uncanniness. It reminds of an outdoors exhibit I saw years ago in a park. Giant hands on a hill. It was so chilling and kinda supernatural. Needless to say I hated those and refused to get closer. Huh, never thought about it until now. I suppose that in a cartoony style it's fine, but if I were to see those arms sticking out of the cake in real life I would feel uneasy. It'd all depends on the material it's made off.

Oh wait wait wait. Looking again at the arm cake, it looks like someone getting out of a portal, arms first. Don't you think? Yeah, funny that considering the ability John will get much later. Oooooh John and its relation with arms. I'm👏on👏to👏some👏thing

John: Allocate hammer to strife specibus.

Dude really was on something with the concept of kind abstrata. Like, it's dumb but genius at the same time. Wanna use a type of weapon? Gonna choose it first, oh and you can only pick 3-4. It's revolutionizing the RPG equipment style in my opinion. Taking something that already exist and spice it up. If I had to pick, I would say bladekind, fistkind and bookkind. The last one a bit as a joke. Ok, let's take a look at the other abstrata. I'm just going to do those we can see on the second picture.

CW/TW: graphic details, implicit/implied violence

I'm putting those there cause idk at what point my comments are too much or not.

crowbarkind: The heist weapon. Also an important anti-juju juju. I wonder what you can get be alchemizing it with something else. Could be critical for defeating the Bad Guy.

broomkind: The classic housewife/janitor one. Also, witch. pokerkind(?): As in cards? I guess throwing sharp cards can be dangerous. icepickkind: Ah yes, Ai: the Somnium Files style. goldclubkind: You know, that's fine. Better use it as a weapon instead of an activity that monopolize land and huge quantity of water. Fuck golf!

hammerkind: John's choice. Lifting a hammer and crushing things with it can be so satisfying. Speaking by experience. Rivet from Ratchet & Clank: Rift Apart uses one too. gunropekind: I think it is, like climbing equipment. Both transportation and weapon! Nicely pragmatic. shovelkind: Ah ha! Reminds me to try Shovel Knight sometime. Seems fun and challenging!

pepmillkind: Being like, 'haha time to get itchy'. Can't see how it can be useful during combat. Maybe for a very specific situation? hatchetkind: Throwing hatchets sound difficult. Talk about skill! spoonkind: One of Jane's abstratus. A small one isn't very efficient, maybe shoving it down someone's throat. Now, a BIG one. Not only you got some much ice cream, but you can fight and shield yourself. I approve 👍

statuekind: I hope we're talking about small ones. Like, you have to be beyond ripped if you want to use a human sized statue.

spatulakind: For your culinary and murderous intent needs. Would be messy though. scrwdrverkind: Screwdriver.. *cringing hiss* goodbye eyes? bladekind: A classic. Though what qualify as a blade, other than a sword? A knife is a blade but I bet it gets its own abstratus. ?? I have no idea. dumbbellkind: If it's 2-4 kg, I can lift it. Throwing it? Man again you have to be a minimum ripped in order to use it as a weapon. Yeah, I started hitting the gym a few weeks ago. Muscle building. We'll see how it goes. hckystickkind(?): Hockeystick? Hmm, ok. Nothing to say about it.

vacuumkind: ha ha, it's already very deadly for cats and dogs. Can you imagine combining it with something with the alchemiter? Slicing/shooting your opponent? No, SUCK 'EM. And then there would be a space system where you could be creative and add more, change the shape, how the enemies are compartmentalized (or not), if you can weaponize them by throwing them back. Wait that's just Slime Rancher main tool isn't it? mopkind: A dirty job: killing then cleaning. trophykind: Again, are we talking about one that fit your hand, or something bigger? Eh, burn out athlete villain story. fncysntakind: These freaking guys! Hussie seems obsessed with fancy santas. They even wrote a huge rant on their blog. Mostly about how they don't make sense and are stupid. I guess he tried to find some use by giving it to Dirk. Like, "They have to do something, right? Right?? I don't know how, but I find a way to fight with them". ladlekind: Same as the spoon. Combining it with something else should improve it.

cordkind: Different from gunropekind. Does an electric cord fit this category? Here y'all an interesting idea for your original character! ironkind: Okay but how do you deal with the cord? Do you alchemize extra cord? Add battery? Turn it into a wireless one? So many questions I didn't know I would be asking today. sawkind: Another serial killer weapon. Though I guess Kanaya's chainsaw fit in this category. Half of it that is.

cleaverkind: I don't know what to add, except serial killer weapon?

iceskatekind: Hmm gonna find a way to properly attach them to your hands. Or OOOHH ice skating style and pirouette to death enemies. Now we're talking! Although bigger problem is the ice. Well a Land full of ice shouldn't be a problem, if it happens. wrenchkind: Ah! Ratchet's weapon. Imagine a Land with bolts and machineries requiring a wretch to solve the puzzles. Sounds neat~ —>

[jiminrings]

Lunchbox lovers request:

So I would love to see a sit down talk between yoongi and mc. Just so like mc can sort her feelings out about everything, and like get advice about forgiving Kook. Idk, I just want those two to have a chat between besties.

-🐞

cold senior!y/n x stem major koo masterlist :D

yoongi will be on y/n’s team — always

“what do you want for dinner?”

yoongi had the best afternoon nap anyone could ever possibly have

it was a mid-afternoon nap actually and something about it just hit different this time

there’s days when it’s extremely warm y’know? not hot, but like uncomfortably warm

it was that uncomfortably warm afternoon when everyone’s collectively feeling sleepy?? turn the airconditioning on to its coolest and sleep without a shirt on and be surrounded by a pillow on both sides......?

yeah that afternoon nap awhile ago really put yoongi on a happy mood

he’s not asking what you want for dinner because he slept good :D

excellent afternoon naps aren’t the only things that make him this way!! lol you could also count days when he receives a random gift out of nowhere and the days when you replace the toothpaste instead of him

but really, whether or not he gets these instances, he genuinely just asks you what you want for dinner so he could either cook it or order it

“what do you want for dinner?” yoongi nudges you from your spot on the couch, about to invade your personal space again and lie down on your lap before you get to cooking

you only hum in response, your best attempt at returning his affection coming in the form of tussling his hair

“we already have dinner, yoongs.”

omg that’s nice then

“you already cooked dinner? even while i was still asleep? wow, look at you,” he praises you abundantly, attempting to pinch your nose when you dodge him

.... that’s the thing though

yoongi watches you visibly freeze when you were doing anything in the first place besides watch your show in a still position

“i didn’t.”

oh

if your dorm was already silent, it became even mORE silent now

if you didn’t cook, then that means-

“jungkook brought dinner.”

yoongi finishes for you and it’s the far worse equivalent of two mothers bringing their own turkeys for thanksgiving

the show you’ve been rewatching is white noise at this point that you can’t recognize anything in this room besides yoongi

it’s been two weeks

that’s literally half a month

two weeks ever since jungkook’s been pouring active effort into working for your forgiveness and normalcy with him out of his own volition

alright maybe you’ll just focus on the gray streaks in yoongi’s new hair <3

and maybe he’ll just focus on the blue stain on your pink pajamas because he put them in the same load when they were newly-purchased <3

yeah but no you can’t do this forever

he can’t do this forever

you and yoongi can’t do this forever

the two of you can’t keep dancing around each other whenever the mention of jungkook pops up because the two of you have two dRASTICALLY different perspectives

right now, yoongi’s just awkwardly laying on your lap and he’s can’t even look up ay the ceiling

“do you wanna talk about it now?”

you end up caving by asking him first, a sigh of relief from holding it in which makes him relieved because he didn’t want to initiate that

“yeah, let’s talk,” he pulls himself up and he’s now looking at you with much embarrassment, “can we even have this conversation while completely sober?”

yoongi’s really rEALLY looking for a distraction to help ease this discomfort in his chest

okay you get where he’s coming from

“you mean you wanna share a joint with me while we have a long-overdue conversation?”

you chuckle at the mental image of yoongi seeing literal stars and freaking out about it, probably crying while he chats to you

“mhmmm. would probably calm our nerves. o-or maybe just mine, atleast.”

to be honest, he doesn’t even have quite a clue on wHY he’s nervous!! it’s the two of you and you’ve always been comfy with each other

that’s the whole foundation of your friendship — you’re fully comfortable with each other and the two of you find it difficult to be this comfy with anyone else

if he really delves deeper into it though, yoongi would know that the reason he’s so nervous for this conversation with you is because he doesn’t want to fight with you

you’d only have occasional tiffs and arguments ever once in a while, but never a fight!!

he’s not assuming that your conversation would turn into a fight, but that possibility scares him still because what if he loses you?

:(((

and if the two of you do fight, it would be over a junior named jungkook who broke your heart and probably insulted you to your core

he doesn’t want to romanticize it either, but if the two of you do fight, yoongi would want it to be something entirely else

he’s willing to have a fight about being messy and how it frustrates you so much

he’d pick a fight over his clingy habits and how it sometimes makes you feel insecure

he’d pick a fight over how he wants to be your number one best friend so bad that it’s beyond unhealthy he’s making it a competition

he’d want a fight over him being a lil insecure of seokjin at times because the two of you get along so well and know much mORE things than he ever could and he can’t always be included in the inside jokes

what yoongi doesn’t want is to fight over jungkook.

“that sounds nice,” you agree because maybe you too are feeling a little antsy, “but we could do that after.”

he nods, his hands curled to his lap that he only meets your eyes now

“okay.”

oh my god

what now

everything’s put out of the way and it’s now the part when you actually tALK

“are you mad at me?”

you take the first approach and it’s already heavy right from the start, the question weighing especially hard in your mind the past few weeks

“what? no. i could never be mad at you,” he answers just as quick and precise, “i’m mad at him.”

“and i understand that.”

you really do know where yoongi’s coming from because after all, you’re the receiving end of all of jungkook’s words at the time

but that’s the thing!!!

that’s tHEE thing that bothers yoongi the most

you have this feeling of guilt because you feel like you’re betraying yoongi in a way

“then why are you letting jungkook in again?”

it’s as if it’s a double-edged sword and merely entertaining jungkook would be a stab in the back to yoongi, even if you don’t owe him anything

“because i understand him too.”

yoongi deadpans at that, a tired sigh falling instinctively from his lips but his mind’s more awake now

“god, seriously?” he shakes his head and outstretches his hands to hold your shoulders in place. “y/n you are the most lovable person i know. you believe him when he told you otherwise-“

“i-i know it isn’t true. it’s not true when it comes from jungkook.”

your voice wavers but it’s not the only thing that’s coming in waves, your resolve blurring even more when you see yoongi fighting back his own tears

“but when it comes from me i-“

“it’s not true either.”

all that yoongi does is take you to his chest the moment your body feels limp with the sigh that escapes you, a knowing body of tears coming next

your parents’ divorce is the furthest thing from fresh but the impact it placed on you renews without warning, the thoughts coming in waves

they were sure to reiterate over and over again that it wasn’t your fault, but god the way that they never even bothered afterwards made you think otherwise

“i-i just feel like a placemarker and neither of them came back for me, y’know? don’t get me wrong, i love my aunt to pieces and she’s family and-“

your faint sobs rack your ribs and yoongi can feel them, a relief that your face is buried to his shoulder so that you wouldn’t see him cry

“jin and i are your family too.”

they are but deep down, you know it’s a whole other ball game

“b-but that’s because you’re unrelated to me. i don’t remind any of you of the other. i’m not your daughter.”

it really wasn’t as harsh as how your words cut out, but it just breaks yoongi’s heart to know how difficult is must have been and is for you

you mumble when you calm down enough, playing with a loose thread on the cardigan you’ve gifted him on his birthday this year

“jungkook didn’t know that sore spot. he couldn’t have, but i’m not defending him either, yoongi.”

you mean it with full sincerity and he’s trying to digest your words as best as he could before his bias gets the best of him

“it’s on him for being horrible to me, but it’s on me for relating what he said to what i felt a long time ago.”

yoongi opens and closes his mouth, but before he does, you’re lifting your head up to interrupt him

god he’s aLSO crying

“use the sleeves to wipe your snot, dumbo. it’s not even that expensive!!” you chuckle when you urge him to do so, making him both frustrated and sheepish because his goddamn snot interrupted you

you lean on his shoulder and stay that way, this time being a rare occurrence in which you cling to him like a koala

“and i know that he shouldn’t have said those things to me either way. i do.”

yoongi nods at that, capturing his point fully

he insists on patting you on the forehead, drawing circles and definitely not a penis as he drawls his words

“he can’t take back what he said, y/n.”

“but that doesn’t mean he can’t redeem himself, yoongs.”

you offer him a timid smile, turning into a bigger one when you know just the right approach to satiate him enough

“jungkook taking accountability is the bare minimum, though,” you chuckle when he nods eagerly to the point he gives himself whiplash, “which is why i’m being smart and haven’t fully forgave him yet.”

…

…..

yoongi sighs when the two of you spend the pause in silence, speaking in all honesty

“i don’t know if i can forgive the little shit.”

“you don’t need to.”

you say just as genuine, a reassuring smile on his face to ease the focused knot on his brows

“you don’t owe it to me, yoongs. i know what you’re thinking.”

you really do

he tends to look at you in high regard even when you tell him that he shouldn’t, and it leads to him with the mindset that he really should appease his best friend at all times

“i eventually will,” he admits quietly. “just not now.”

“that’s okay too.”

it was supposed to be another bout of silence but yoongi actually breaks this time, blurting out words once he felt that the coast was clear

he just needs to get this off his chest before this heart-to-heart moment dwindles

“i don’t want to sound weird, but you’re like, my platonic girlfriend, y’know? my soulmate in a very platonic way, but no one says either that your soulmate has to be in a romantic sense and-…”

you exclaim in relief, your eyes rolling to the back of your head when you jolt him by the shoulders

“god, finally. i’ve always wanted to tell you that i feel the same. you’re my soulmate, i’m pretty sure. my very, very platonic boyfriend i live with.”

yoongi sighs, stares, then fiNALLY heartily laughs in relief

everything’s out of the way :)

“we’re good. we always will be.”

you’re about to get up to fulfill yoongi’s suggestion earlier, being cut short when he gently pulls you by your forearm when you stood

“i’ll always be on your team — you know that right?”

yoongi means it with his whole heart, just one more reminder he wants you to reaffirm in your mind for the night

“i’ll always be on yours too, yoongs.”

[roxyfoxgamer150]

Sooo idk where to start with this blog, but its great and i love observer mirabel but im also reading all this without any context im sort of confused, so ill just ask a bunch of questions hopefull not annoying

how many mirabels have been made?

what does scrappy mirabel mama mirabel and observer mirabel look like? Any concepts? If u dont mind i would like to draw them.

Where do observer mirabel & scrappy end up when they leaves an au?

Why do they go into different au's in the first place.

Is observer mirabel okay- and how old is she.

Where did the idea of Observer mirabel au come from ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

How many Mirabels have been made? Depends on how many AU's and Timelines I kept seeing in TikTok, Tumblr, basically anywhere

Where do Observer and Scrap end up?

They end up in Observer's version of casita, which is rarely active. Although if your asking what room they end up in, they end up in Observer's room (imagine it's just a white room, but full of portals and it just never ends.)

Why do they go into AU's in the first place

It was originally because Observer was supposed to stop the timelines where something went wrong (Ex: a future where mirabel is suppose to be alive, but instead died). But now she can just interact with two-way portals that has correct futures if she wants to.

Is Observer Mirabel okay?

I just gave her so much trauma and action by letting her go into AUs where she's dead and much more.

Define "okay."

How old is Observer?

15 and half months old (She's an inch taller than the canon one.)

I'm planning to draw them as a sketch because I'm not good at drawing lmao

Although if you wanna draw them, do whatever you want I honestly just use words I'm so sorry 😅

Observer:

She wears a poncho (Black or any shade of yellow, your choice! :D) (Hood up if wanna make it cute or menacing)

Her glasses are cracked sometimes (Your choice again, you can make one of the lenses crack if u want to :D)

A scarred lip *Insert lip bite emoji if there ever was one*

If you wanna draw her using her gift, glowing yellow eyes and mouth.

She's a bit more serious

Edit: if she's going to go full on "mysterious-knight-in-shining-leather" she'll just wear a motorcycle protective suit (Don't draw this, it's too difficult)

Scrappy Mirabel:

Bandages on arms (Bloody or not ur choice)

A bit of nosebleed??

Absolutely has one of her lenses on her glasses cracked

She's still the same as the canon, just a bit more feral and protective

[vodkacheesefries]

I would like to see the blorbo list

BLORBO LIST. I kept seeing this and typing a list in my notes and then forgetting. Did I tell you all I was officially diagnosed with ADHD yet because I was and it tracks

Also most all names/properties will be censored because of the way Tumblr's search function works and I don't wanna be that person in the search. There really only is one ship here that I feel like I can say I hate and if you've been following me for any length of time you'll know what it is when I get there.

but ANYWAY: Blorbos/Blorbo properties I would like to be able to go through their tag to find content but there is a wild amount of shipping stuff that make it difficult:

L0rd of the Rings - specifically Bilb0 & Frod0. Personally feel like Bilb0 deserves better than Th0rin (I didn't care for him much, even in the book and I feel like that's a relatively unpopular take? He's kind of a douche, idk) and I'm a big fan of aro/ace Frod0 so I don't care for most Frod0 ships. I don't have strong feelings about it really, but would like some simple just B@ ggins content plz.

**this being said tho, please give me all of the G*mli/Leg0las content, I am WEAK for it

Avat*r the Last Airbend*r- I have too many internet flame war flashbacks to have any super strong opinions about most of the ships in Avat*r, but trying to find stuff about my girl Katar@ without ship stuff everywhere is a struggle sometimes. Same with S0kka.

The new St@ r W@ rs trilogy specifically- I'm going to leave it simple and just say R3y. This isn't about all of the ships I see for hers, just the one. THE one. I'll let y'all fill in the blanks on this one. God it even got into the general St@ r W@ rs tag right after the last movie was released and it was insufferable

L3gend of Z3lda - don't get me wrong, I enjoy several L*nk and/or Z3lda ships, but I feel like ships are all the content I see about L0Z anymore.

Those are the big ones I'm thinking of right now because that's the media I rotate through pretty often.

In a more understandable way, any of the player character tags and NPC tags from any of the Bi0ware properties can sometimes get bogged down by ship stuff. It bothers me much, much, MUCH less because that's a pretty big selling point of the games but sometimes I might just be lookin for stuff about Elvish wardens/inquisitors because I like learning about people's OCs but its hard to find without the shipping aspect sometimes. Again, totally get it and it's not really anyone's fault.

This ended up being a more vague list about Blorbos so I can definitely make a list of my favorite Blorbos and head canons because that could be fun activity for a night I can't fall asleep.

[halcyon-writings]

Hey I dont know if your open for requests but I was wondering if you could possibly do an imagine for sero, Amajiki, and bakugou where they're in a relationship that is just rocking the addam family vibes. Hand kiss, random waltz, unduing love. Just that sort of thing. Sorry if the ask is long. Love your work!

note(s): this request is really cute and i cannot stop thinking about it. and please don’t apologize it’s no trouble at all! but you know what else that means? they’re goth !!! good for them good for them!! gn reader as per usual folks let’s get it

hcs under the cut!!

as much as i hate what a certain part of the fandom did when it came to hc’ing sero as hispanic, i wholeheartedly back it bc i too am hispanic and its what i personally deserve- Anyway, i like to think that he loves dancing. And I feel like Sero is a big dork, a sap, and he would be the kind of guy to just pull his s/o into a random waltz/slow dance regardless of whether or not there’s music playing.

If there is none, he will provide the music. Either from his phone or from himself; yes, he will sing some cheesy old song while he spins you around and dances with you. man, now i want an s/o like him. Please stop him, but also don’t since it’s really cute. He only really does it when he has that like sixth sense that you’re feeling down. Sero starts to hum a familiar tune, and he gives you a smug look when you hide a small smile from him. But you humor him anyway.

Sero makes this funny, sweet, and sappy. The whole shebang. But since you mention the Addam’s family, just imagining goth sero or like... goth aligned jdgksjgds. He would match outfits with you if that was your kind of aesthetic too. And whenver he sees something that might remind him of you, and just gets so happy to see that you like it.

But anyway back to the waltzing, I feel like he just knows about it from like reading about it on wikipedia, or just the internet in general whenever it was like 3 am and he’s scrolling on his phone. (And maybe he practiced to want to impress you, but he will admit that to no one. Denki might have caught him once and after making him swear to secrecy, then Sero will pretend no one had seen anything. You caught him one day using a mop as a dance partner and it was really cute to see him get all flustered. But you promise him a dance anyway, (and maybe a kiss too but that’s between you two and the bakusquad who you discovered was there for emotional support). 

tama... my wonderful boy, the light of my life, small warning for spoilers but like hori where is he, please i’ll give you the 5 dollars i have in my purse just let me see my baby. PLEASE IM DESPARATE-

*coughs* so anyway, as someone who’s overall a giant mix of anxiety and overthinking, Tamaki definitely is the type of person who grounds these worries through physical contact. Whether it’s you walking arm in arm, or hand in hand (more likely than not it’s the first option, as the second almost has him combusting bc of the way your hands are so warm and how they fit his own, or how his fit in yours).

It becomes a mini ritual to just take your hand in his and kiss your palm. Granted, the poor thing is just really red the entire time so it’s all the more endearing. But Tamaki is doing his best, and that’s all I ask of him. In return, give his hand a squeeze and he’s just, settled by your side (think the one meme of ariana grande except he’s ariana and you’re pete ;loves to walk hand in hand with you). While you don’t actively do it, you know sometimes that his anxiety makes it very difficult to talk to people so sometimes you talk for him, only when he says it’s okay though! But you will fight a person if they say anything about it negatively.

Another thing he likes to do is link pinkies!!! Idk why but the mental image of that is just so cute. Although this was more common in the beginning of your relationship (bc he just knew that his palms were sweaty and he didn’t want you to notice) but he still does it from time to time!!! Like maybe the hallways at UA or the train home are a bit crowded. Having you nearby also helps him feel that you’re safe too.

Katsuki, aka the Ride or Die Extraordinaire. I’ve seen this hc a lot in general, but he’d literally never casually date. when you’re together that’s it, he’s set on you and you only. And like, highkey that’s oddly comforting dhdjdjd. Safe to say, he is dedicated.

And while he’s not very into pda, not bc of that Image™️ that people try and say he has, but really it’s because it’s not something he needs to show that he’s with you, he knows you and trusts you (but it doesn’t mean he complains when you put your hand in his, fingers intertwined just don’t point out the way his ears flush a bright red, otherwise he’ll act like he doesn’t and it only makes him more red).

He may not look it, but he’ll also match in aesthetic if you want him too. Bakugo is that much of your biggest fan and personal cheerleader. If you’re unsure of a color maybe not fitting you or a certain style, he will go out and get you more clothes like that both for you and him. In his words, “You’re fine as hell and this is the one time I’ll accept not being number 1.” Or something along those lines. If someone says anything negative about it, you have to stop him from verbally tearing them a new one.

Adding to that last point, he’s protective but not to the point where he’s overprotective He knows you’re fully capable of kicking ass. (including his *cough*) Like I just wanna reiterate that if there was anyone that was so dedicated to an s/o in a sort of manner that Cortez is to Morticia, it’d be Katsuki. I take no criticism.

[anarmorofwords]

I kinda wanna write a better version of tlh where Tatiana is still insane but there's no Belial bc that makes zero sense to me

In this version there would be:

Kamanna done correctly with actual genderqueer rep and not toxic relationships

Barbra and Oliver bc fight me she didn't die

Genie and Filomena bc I love them and all the lightwoods are queer

The gracelet doesn't even happen bc I refuse to write that

Grace is pretty much still the same but she breaks off their(hers and james') relationship bc she notices that he loves Cordelia

No bad James. He's not a shitty person to Alastair, and he doesn't treat Cordelia like a sex object

Anna puts a stop to Kellington and Matthew's relationship before it gets serious. She also tries to get him to stop drinking all the time

Alastair apologizes around seeing them again for the first time. The merry thieves are a little reluctant because of some of the things he did but they don't actively try to keep him away from events that they're at

Matthew notices how Alastair looks at Thomas and locks them in the sanctuary with Genie and Cordelia's help

Grace gets badly injured due to a mistake in necromancy and Christopher helps her treat it without letting people know

Lucie meets Jesse, and falls in love ofc, so in order to bring him back successfully she asks Malcolm to train her in using her magic

Matthew opens up to his mom about the incident. She doesn't blame him at all and instead apologizes for often putting her work before him

Matthew finds out about Charles and Alastair because he found Alastairxs break up letter to Charles

Matthew, the mother hen he is, decided to attempt to murder his older brother, only being stopped by James who had been there at the right time

Kamala ends things with Charles and tells Anna that she still loves them and hopes that she will give her another chance

Anna told her that they needed time to think, and that she is worried how Kamala's reputation will be affected if anyone besides their friends and Anna's family finds out

Kamala respects her decision and doesn't contact her until Anna's ready to talk about things

The merry thieves don't ignore Christopher and they actively listen and help him

The merry thieves also aren't terrible to Grace bc they realize she's been isolated alone with Tatiana and 1) she might not understand what's saying/doing is wrong or 2) that sometimes she's trying to push them away so her abilities don't accidentally make them do something

Good tid parents

James and Alastair being respectful to each other despite personal differences

Matthew, Alastair, Kamala, Christopher, and Grace being besties, or as I call them, the neglected squad

No fetishizing mlm/wlw

Domestic cuddles and taking care of the other one when they're sick

Jesse/Lucie/Matthew pairing bc I love them and I refuse to pick between lucie/matthew and lucie/jesse

Christopher teaching Grace the elements(at the time) on the periodic table

Tatiana dies at the end yay

It's very unpolished and I'm open to b hearing any feedback and/or suggestions that anyone may have

The idea came to me and I decided it would be best if I told someone before I forgot

hi, I'm sorry it took so long,but I wanted to properly answer this and I keep having either internet connection issues or little time

DON'T BE SHY, WRITE THIS 👀

In all seriousness tho... THIS IS ABSOLUTE PERFECTION?!? I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE TO START I AM UTTERLY IN LOVE WITH THIS IDEA, I NEED IT

Look, I've been on the verge of rewriting ChoI, and I keep saying I want someone to write a TLH that will live up to its potential, but I've never actually came up with a proper idea for it, and you?!! YOUR BRAIN DARLING THIS IS GENIUS

ok hold up I'll just react to each and every single one so

yes please?!? I mean it started off so sweet in EEV?! Also actually genderqueer Anna and not dancing around the subject like CC is doing now?! That's what they deserve, and that's what we all deserve too

yesss please. also just,,,, Barbara, the feminine, not-wanting-to-fight-which-doesnt-make-her-less-badass queen that she is, getting the page space and appreciation she deserves

that's actually brilliant?!? it would be so great, just imagine the new girl arrives for her travel year and Genie is completely awestruck. I'm so invested in Joshwood it's difficult to imagine not having them, but this is actually the only valid alternative?!

ok that's fine. I think it could still happen and be done well, but tbh for now... the gracelet doesn't seem to have done anything relevant to the plot itself? I mean yeah it messed up James's life and Jordelia, but what did it give Belial? Tatiana? nothing. It makes no sense atm.

could be! maybe she's still encouraged by Tatiana to befriend/seduce him, but without the gracelet it doesn't work out? or maybe James somehow manages to realize that she's in danger and he actually like,,,, kidnaps her? idk idk

yes. YES. just,,,,z James is a sweet compassionate literature nerd who accidentally makes a good leader and he actually cares about people, and not just judges them from his high horse; he does still have hero syndrome, but he's kind and respectful and overall a good character

ANNA INTERVENES ABOUT KELLINGTON PLZ. PEOPLE ACTUALLY NOTICE MATTHEW'S STRUGGLES. JAMES DOES, TOO, BECAUSE THERE'S NO GRACELET.

ok yes, so what about: basically TMT don't harass Alastair and accept his apology, and realize they were also being stupid and mean at times at the Academy (especially Math). Matthew doesn't want to accept Alastair's apology, because of The Sin, but his behaviour alerts the rest of TMT and they inquire what's wrong and he tells them about the sin and that's how he later tells his parents (because his friends encourage him) and as you say, she just hugs him and reassures him it's not his fault; so after that Matthew slowly begins to heal and accepts it wasn't Alastair's fault, and also since they've kind of adopted/started including Alastair in things, he can't help but notice he's actually changed and he even starts to grow fond of him

then like you said, Matthew notices Thomas likes Alastair PLEASE HE SO WOULD. I'm not sure about the Sanctuary, if it actually happens (I'll get to why later on), but him and Lucie get really invested in the matchmaking schemes, they include Genie/Kamala because these two are friends with Alastair (both? Or at this point only Kamala?) but they also share some Moments during their scheming/talking about love 👀 (yes I'm a Fairdale shipper, I think it's time to expose myself lol)

Which leads me to (sorry I'm going off order rn) YES YES YES LUCIE AND MATH PLEASE. A FELLOW SHIPPER, HELLO, NICE TO MEET YOU. But since we're actually fixing him then we can give Jesse a personality and I'm totally down for poly Math/Lucie/Jesse

Lucie seeking Malcolm's help in secret, morally gray heroine style?!? no, it's probably not legal. but also has there ever been a Shadowhunter like her? If the Law doesn't expect such situations, it can't really forbid them...

Plz Matthew ready to strangle the carrot when he learns about their relationship, YES. sure, maybe he's still not the biggest fan of Alastair, but he's seen how much the boy's been through and starts to develop an attachment to him, and besides, NO ONE DESERVES TO BE GROOMED AND TREATED LIKE THAT. He's SO MAD at Charles, and he confronts him about it - remembering Kellington as he does, and it makes him sick to think his brother would do the same thing to someone. Maybe he gets very emotional over this and later finally tells his friends about Kellington? Maybe they didn't know before, only Anna did? So when they all realize what was happening then they comfort him etc? Or maybe it's just Alastair that learns now, and the others knew before, and they share a bonding moment over that?

Injured Grace seeking Kit's help is a genius idea I didn't know I needed

Kamanna giving each other time and space and deciding they need to question their relationship and figure out if it actually makes sense would be great. Anna realising she's very privileged and Kamala doesn't have those same opportunities, and also in general realising coming out should never be pressured or forced. Just,,,, Anna being self-aware and respectful towards Kamala. Well-written Anna. Plz. Also Kamanna is actually developed and not just "in love" because,,,,, they're attracted to each other? Maybe even remaining friends while Anna makes up their mind?

yeah just TMT being more compassionate and less judgy because they're not written by Judith so her bias isn't projected onto them

It's not a want, it's a need. They adopt Alastair and Grace eventually. Like, maybe not literally - although, Grace? - but you know what I mean.

I think they all should just have various friendship dynamics and switch between them, because people need more than one friend group

no fetishizing, no watching your brother make out with his lover, yessss

yes domestic cuddles, affection, taking care of wounds, all those things. plz.

Gracetopher bonding over science yes

obviously. or maybe she's imprisoned?!

ok, now for some more notes/my ideas etc., if you don't mind:

I actually think Belial could still be featured? After all, I don't think Tatiana could do much on her own, and since she seeks help from demons, it makes sense to include a Greater Demon as well. But Belial would have to be a stronger villain, written better; I'll think more about this

if that was the case, the serial killer plot could still happen, but be done better. and it would allow for a scenario I talked about with @littlx-songbxrd to happen, where it's Alastair who's falsely accused of murder. It creates a great opportunity to explore some things, because we know Alastair is much more likely to be seriously suspected, considering all the prejudices and bad rep his family has and all that

...what do you say to well-written Jordelia? 👀 Cordelia hasn't been obsessively in love with James since childhood, she only had a crush then. And now that they meet again, she's fond of him but not in love, not straight away. They're both grown up, and different people, but as they spend more and more time together, they fall in love. What if Cordelia gets to flirt with some other boys first? What then. What if she ends up choosing James, instead of going for the only boy she's ever had feelings for and idealized since childhood. What if we even make it friends-to-lovers and have James be a little jealous at some point?! but not in a possessive awful way, just "oh damn oh no"

Now I won't know peace until this exists BUT THANK YOU

[fox-steward]

hi. i hope you don't mind me asking this but i need some advice.

i was born female, and ive always been a tomboy, sometimes in the most stereotypical way. i was also a little lesbian who didn't know it yet. but after my younger sibling came out to me as trans, i started second guessing everything about myself.

for the sake of my sibling, who im closer to than anyone in my life, i learned about what theyre going through to support them and ended up getting taken in myself. i consumed all the yaoi and gay fanfiction they did, i read up on all the identities that were within the trans umbrella and eventually i started to think i wasnt a girl at all, but my infact a feminine transboy.

i never was able to transition on account of my family but the growing inner hate i felt for myself made me want to because deep down I knew that no matterr what i said or believed, id never be the cis gay boys i, essentially, fetishised and craved to be. it made me miserable, but i wanted to be accepted so badly that i stuck with it. but then i fou d your blog and others like it, and reading through it, whole reevaluating myself made me realise how misguided my mindset was.

despite realising that me being a tomboy is perfectly fine, i cant help but cling to that idea of being a boy, even though i have no idea what it means to "be a boy" or "feel like a boy". all i know is what the media portrays boys, feminine boys and gay boys to be like, and i clung to that idea for so long that i believed it to be my identity.

i just wanted to ask, if i can, how can i get over this mindset? i feel terrible because my younger sibling still identifies as trans without a shadow of a doubt, and my questioning of myself makes me feel awful, but i also feel bad because... i dont know who i am really now. how can i just be me again?

sorry this is long. any advice would be very very much appreciated.

it sounds like you’ve been through it, anon. whew! i just wanna acknowledge what a mindfuck you’ve been through, and it’s normal to feel no so great.

i actually think you’re grieving, strange as that sounds, but hear me out. being female is not easy, being a masculine woman comes with its own set of challenges, and imagining yourself as a “gay transboy” was an escape from all that. you could imagine a future for yourself where you grew up to be a gay man, not a gay woman. it’s worth noting relationships between men are the only sexual/romantic pairing that isn’t party to misogyny within the relationship itself.

it’s intoxicating to imagine we could have that ourselves, huh? it happened to me too, and i’m not even actually attracted to males at all, i was really just seduced by the idea of a relationship of equals.

but this. is. a. fantasy. one we as female people can never achieve.

so you’re grieving the vision you had for your future. your grief doesn’t care that the thing you promised yourself is impossible.

you’re undergoing another shift in the way you see yourself, the way you imagine yourself moving through the world. that’s hard, anon. being a tomboy, while absolutely lovely and perfectly fine, can be really difficult in our misogynistic society. it’s like that dworkin quote i’m about to butcher—something something absolutely excruciating to be fully aware of the misogyny all around us. you get the gist. and she’s right, but that doesn’t mean it’s not worth it.

so idk, i don’t have any specific advice, but i do know a lot about grief. with grief, you gotta accept you’re gonna feel shitty for a while and absolve yourself of the responsibility of ~fEeLiNg HaPpY~ for now. i’m being flippant because happiness is a mirage anyway. we get pricks of joy, moments of brightness or laughter, flow and contentment, enjoyment, pleasure, and these fill in between other moments of discomfort or monotony or tedium or malaise or or or. and if we’re lucky we are aware when the good stuff is happening, so that we can pause and say, gee this is nice. and if you get enough of then and you’re aware enough as they’re happening, perhaps you can tie it up in a bow of hindsight and call it contentment.

tangent, sorry. practically, keep yourself busy and tire yourself the fuck out, tbh. when my wife left, i started just going and doing things, anything i didn’t actively NOT want to do. dancing, concerts, art class, bike ride, walk a friends dog, cooking class, sit in a field and listen to music.

just do anything. i know it’s hard during covid, but it isn’t so much WHAT you do but THAT you do. take the field example—you have to travel there (that kills time!) and maybe you walk or bike (that is physical activity) then you do the thing you planned to do (takes more time) and you have to travel home (more time and activity) then you have completed something you set out to do (an achievement/free endorphins).

i also took up running when she left (tire myself the fuck out) and that changed so much for me. with grief, rumination and sleeplessness plagued me; running took both those out of the equation. so my sleep improved, i got stronger and my cardiovascular fitness improved, i ate better, i got to see myself improve and achieve goals, got to build an identity separate from who i was in my marriage. so i cannot recommend running enough.

and as for identity, finding out “who you are”—identity is a trap. don’t cement yourself to any one thing because everything changes. don’t define yourself by externalities, just be open and curious about your inner life, your qualities (which are also able to change btw) and start to strengthen the ones you like, like training a muscle. i practice (literally practice) kindness and discipline, which are important qualities for how i see myself. i also practice at compassion and i like how these things make me feel and how i show up in the world when i’m practicing at them. what qualities will you train in yourself?

you’re not defined in relation to your sibling, btw, and they aren’t defined in relation to you. you can question transness while still loving them.

you’re gonna be just fine, anon. you have plenty of time. grieve the future you can’t have, even though it’s truly for the best, and cultivate a person in yourself you’re excited to be. good luck.

[youcantfiremebecauseiquit]

idk if u care but crispin gray recently had an interview about his entire career and it kind of changed my perspective of queenadreena…idk if for better or for worse lol. it was weird to see him so dismissive of a lot of his catalogue w katie except for ‘love your money’ just because that was the only remotely chart successful song. i get you want to be able to sustain yourself but jeez him and katie really had a weird back and forth relationship

Sorry i'm replying late, i've seen the interview pop up on Youtube but honestly i was too invested in university shit recently & generally not in the good mood for that but i'm planning to watch. How did it change your view on Queen Adreena, did he say something mean specifically on QA or Katie? I mean i gotta watch it but honestly? Not surprised in the slightest. A few years ago he was asked to describe fave songs he recorded throughout the years and he listed more of Daisy Chainsaw ones than anything else, with Love Your Money as number 1. The differences in their points of view are real something, Katie Jane absolutely HATED Love Your Money, same as Daisy Chainsaw. Kinda apparent he wanted bigger fame but DC dropped fast and QA failed to live up to their predictions.

i had a time when i liked to dig up old Queen Adreena interviews that are lost in the old internet & generally not available for years (which i planned to post on is-she-suffering but my investment in that site is... varied in its intensity). Also that was back in the days when i wrote Queen Adreena book during manic phase and tried to sell it but lost motivation Well since i don't do anything with that knowledge anyway i'll put what i know here as i love fan discussions

So they sure had/have odd back and forth love-hate relationship & that's the reason why their career went how it went. There's been a huge tension between them at some point. I'm sure you know she had a major mental breakdown (probably schizophrenic episode) after Daisy Chainsaw, or even beginning before her leaving, and then she went into isolation and lived with an old woman in Lake District for awhile. She left Daisy Chainsaw cause Crispin didn't want her to come up with her own songs (all of DC was by Crispin except for Lovely ugly brutal world by KJ).

They almost split up as Queen Adreena after Drink Me. The material for The Butcher and The Butterfly was written at different times, originally it was meant to be called Atom Bomb at Bikini but it was constantly delaying and they eventually recorded everything they've got live. So that's obvious right? But i was surprised to find out they were writing songs separately. Some of them (i forgot which though) were written by Katie Jane and Pete Howard's sons band (they're even credited) + some with Melanie Garside, Richard Adams + some other musician. Katie Jane didn't like it. They intended it to be their last album at the time. She also hated live at ICA show but they released it cause they were broke

But that's a digression. I just wanna say that at this point they were done with each other but kept pushing it. Katie had her own art projects and stuff, Crispin started Dogbones with Nomi and i just remember how vaguely pissed at Katie he waas in the interviews. Like he stressed that Dogbones is his number one priority and if Katie wants to do something with Queenadreena, she must wait til Dogbones have a break first or something, and it sounded oddly bitter.

RaCH and Djinn era are just so weird, they had opportunities but let them go in a way. I don't think many people know but they were huge demand in Japan. They entered album charts and were interviewed by 11 magazines and 6 (!)TV stations there (wtf happened to that material i want to know???). But they only played 5 times or less.

Katie said she considers the band dead but they decided they can try to play for a couple more months. But aside from that she 100% lost the interest in the band around Djinn. There's an interview where she says "the overall image is Crispin but the shape will change again at rehearsals". And you can hear it, it’s more blues rock than anything. IMO it's their worst production wise. Instruments are fine but Katie's voice is so badly produced that sometimes i find some songs fucking irritating, cause they didn’t cut out her breaths and the vocals are TOO LOUD, to the point of distorting. As if she stands too close to the mic. The album is fine but it feels unfinished.

And here we come back to Crispin... here's what he said after the QA split:

Why the Dogbones started? “I needed to work more than the previous band I was in was working, the previous band who shall remain nameless, haha… um… Queenadreena. I wanted to work more than the singer of Queenadreena wanted to work… so that’s why it started. Fine by me… but I really like to be in a band, I’m not a solo project kind of guy. The last album (‘Djin’) did come out in the UK, but it was so low key because Katie kind of disappeared so there was little point in promoting it. Personally it’s my favourite by far so it was a shame but there you go… So here are Dogbones, it’s not been an easy ride but we are trying very hard.

Ok so the bitterness is kinda apparent isn't it. I think there were two reasons why they argued so much, first musical differences. Katie at some point lost interest in loud rock music for some years and went the folk way in Ruby Throat. I have a theory that Taxidermy and Drink Me are more influenced by Katie Jane and Butcher and Djinn are more Crispin. During first albums i think Katie more actively took part in music composition and choosing arrangements. She wrote lyrics, melodies but also composed a lot of songs on some little electronic keyboard thing and 4 track (Heavenly Surrender, Pray for me, My Silent Undoing, all Lalleshwari +more). Plus she wanted more peaceful/dreamy sound on Taxidermy than full on rock, Crispin complained about it in some 00's interview, that he'd like it to be more rock. Then there are 2 versions of Drink Me, the original has rough and alt versions of songs (it was sold by Katie and it's leaked on FB and probably YT). Crispin Gray apparently really hated the final Drink Me. Now next album is The Butcher & The Butterfly and it's more standard blues rock, no more crazy dreamy things of previous albums etc., Djinn is even more blues rock but darker. Djinn was his favourite at some point while KJ hated Butcher, not sure about Djinn. So i think they had different views on where they should go, Katie made her weird simplistic creepy tunes (like Lalleshwari) and folk melodies adding that strange things to noise rock. Crispin probably wanted blues & rock.

Other than that, i’m convinced they are bitter exes, lol. There’s been rumours about them dating during Daisy Chainsaw for years, plus Katie had a history of dating band members. Crispin wrote X-ing off the days about her. I don’t know if they dated again in Queen Adreena. Then there’s this interview, timeline is unclear, either The butcher & the butterfly or later:

„Katie writes all the songs herself and often looks for melodies and structure with the drummer. With Crispin - her husband or ex-husband, which is not entirely clear to me - for almost three years she has no longer been in a room. "Sometimes we send him a letter with a new song and that's all we can do. All we have are our lungs and our musical talent and we have to do with it. It is repugnant difficult life, I know most of the time how I should deal with it." But Queenadreena will still remain even exist? "I think so, we are now pretty busy and I see where the ship aground.”

I always wondered what exactly happened after Djinn, i’ve seen Katie Jane say „i think they gave up on me” while others said she disappeared. Other times CG said there’s no bad blood between them but at the same time there’s been some weird tension.  As of recent i thought they reconnected somehow through the internet and had a good relation but who really knows.s

I get why Crispin gets irritated when people compare everything he does to „stealing from KJ” but honestly, he gave them good reasons, at least in the 90’s. I can believe Starsha Lee singer isn’t copying Katie cause she’s from Brazil or something and she didn’t know Queen Adreena before. But everything else… Crispin’s problem is that he doesn’t know what he wants. He spent 90’s chasing something, tried singing himself, had girl singer replacements and even one KJ copy. Dogbones was ironically his most original non-Katie band, even with all their grunge influences. In a way he wants to be a frontman and at the same time doesn’t. Idk if he’s very controlling, but Daisy Chainsaw shows he valued his songs/lyrics first & in Queen Adreena he had to step back a lot, cause Katie’s condition was she would be in charge of the lyrics. I don’t think he realizes how strongly Daisy Chainsaw issues affected Katie, i mean from her own words you can read that aside from media attention/hate, her being unable to write lyrics had a role in her breakdown. I think she now let go but for years she hated remembering Daisy Chainsaw and she felt kind of worthless cause she was only somebody else’s mouthpiece. I’m not trying to say he’s cruel or anything, but i firmly believe rock lyrics writers should sing their own songs or else there are problems.

They both were writers-composers with different vision and i have impression they struggled a lot while shaping their songs, cause they both stuck to their ideas. Hence 2 versions of Princess Carwash maybe. Katie once said that he „gets terribly upset with her” cause she writes her songs on a simple wind organ and uses a few chord buttons only. Clash of writer ways/personalities/egos and at some point they had to let go.

Maybe he prefers music/bands where he was 100% in control including lyrics (note he wrote/sang some lyrics in Dogbones too). Daisy Chainsaw achieved bigger success US and UK wise as they were offered to play Top of The Pops, and they’re more well liked/remembered by „general alt public”. Queen Adreena however is way more valued as a cult band, with cult following and admiration in UK & France. Most people think Pretty Like Drugs and other QA songs are his best work and he probably finds it irritating cause truth is, he never managed to be more successful than Daisy Chainsaw/Queenadreena. Love Your Money is ironically the least Crispin Gray/DC/QA sounding song in my opinion. I kinda find it irritating that he downplays Queen Adreena cause it was probably his best work in this band but whatever

So yeah sorry for the word spill, that’s what i can think of it right now but as i said, i haven’t watched the interview yet, it’s just this kind of treatment is in a way consistent for him