#idk ? hope this helps bub !
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hi bestie,, idk if u take requests buttt have u seen kieran culkin speech after he won his emmy & then him asking his wife for another baby on stage 😁🤭🤭 idk i thought that would a cute h blurb
that kieran speech was SO CUTE i just had to take this request !!! happy one year of grammy winner Harry for those who celebrate! i hope you like this as much as I do
MASTERLIST | MY PATREON
The night had been one for the books.
Harry became a Grammy winner for the second time within the first 30 minutes of the ceremony, getting the award for Best Pop Vocal Album, and your heart bursted with joy and pride and you watched him collect it.
He also delivered an amazing performance even though he had a stage malfunction that was out of his control, and after a few minutes of pep talk backstage, you convinced him that he should be proud of what he did no matter what.
Nights like tonight made you look back at your journey with Harry, from getting frustrated each year when the Grammys refused to give One Direction a nomination, to consoling him when his debut single Sign of the Times got overlooked and celebrating when they finally ave him his long overdue nomination for Fine Line. And now, being one of the most nominated artists of the night and a winner already.
Harry was not an artist that let awards or numbers define his career at all, but you knew that deep down he appreciated getting a nod and recognition for the hard work he puts into his music.
"What's on your mind, honey?" Harry asked and he noticed that you had been quiet for a few minutes, the show was on a commercial break so you could talk freely.
"Just thinking about how am I getting a picture with Beyoncé before the night ends," you joked, making him laugh along, "I'm also thinking about the bub, do you think she's okay?"
Harry couldn't help but smile at the mention of your daughter. Little baby Styles had been welcomed into the world a year and a half ago, looking like an exact carbon copy of Harry with curls, dimples and charming green eyes.
It's safe to say that she became Harry's entire world from the moment he saw her for the first time.
"I bet she's fast asleep by now after snuggling with mum for hours," you smiled at the thought, "You know she's obsessed with mum."
"She just loves her nana," you almost cooed, "And her Grammy winner daddy, even tho she doesn't have any idea what that means."
"You know," Harry began, and by the look on his face you knew he was up to no good, "She could become obsessed with her bay brother or sister too, if we decided to give her one."
The smirk on Harry's face after his statement was almost devilish, making you look him with wide eyes and a grin on your own.
"Are you asking me for another baby in the middle of the Grammys?" Harry shrugged, the smirk not leaving his face, "You're a menace. But, maybe if you win, I'll think about it."
Before Harry could reply, the lights dimmed signaling that commercial break was over and it was time for more awards, more specifically, the most important award of the night: Album of the Year.
Trevor Noah, the host, talked about the importance and meaning of the award, the fans the production had invited to support the nominees stood beside him in a line.
You could barely focus on what was being said because your eyes were fixed on Harry's hand gripping yours tightly, and you felt like throwing up from nerves if you looked at the stage.
And the Grammy goes to…” Trevor spoke into the mic, making a dramatic pause that felt way too long and made you finally look up no the stage, noticing that he was standing in front of Reina, Harry's fan.
And that was the moment you knew, the Album of the Year was Harry's House.
“It’s you!” both you ans Jeff whisper-yelled in unison, looking at each other with shocked faces and making Harry give you a confused look.
“What do you-” and before he could even finish his sentence his name was being called out and the trumpets from Music for a Sushi Restaurant filled the place.
Harry immediately covered his face in disbelief, shaking his head and taking in in the moment. You couldn't help but stand up and jump in your place, adrenaline and excitement, but mostly pride, running through your veins.
"My love, you won! Harry's House won!" you said into his ear when he finally wrapped his arms around you, pecking the side of yiur head repeatedly before kissing your lips quickly.
"I love you," was all he said before getting rushed into the stage along with his collaborators and friends.
"Shit!" was the first thing that came out of his mouth once he had his Grammy in hand, making everyone laugh, “I mean,shit! I’ve been so, so inspired by every artist in this category with me. At a lot of different times in my life I listen to everyone in this category when I’m alone,” he took a breath,"I think on nights like tonight, it’s obviously so important for us to remember that there is no such thing as best in music. I don’t think any of us sit in the studio thinking, making decisions based on what is gonna get us one of these.”
You stood with your hands clutched to your chest, your eyes filled with happy tears and nothing but love and admiration for him.
"I'd like to thank my mom and my sister for being my biggest supporters and giving me a great childhood, I would be nowhere without you," he paused to look directly at you from the stage, his eyes immediately watering again, "And of course my beautiful wife, YN. Thank you for sharing your beautiful life with me and giving me an amazing daughter who is the reason I do what I do everyday,"
You were unaware of the camera focusing on your and catching the moment you mouthed an 'I love you' to him from your place.
"I love you both so much, you mean the world to me. And YN," he paused, the devilish look from earlier making his way to his face again, along with a teasing raised eyebrow that told you that he was about to do something major, "I want another one."
The entire arena erupted into laughs and cheers, Jeff clapped and whistled from beside you and you couldn't help but cover your face in shock and embarrassment, astonished by Harry's anctics.
"You said, maybe if I won, and I did!" the crowd laughed even more, "I love you, so much. Thank you for this, I'll never forget it."
Harry got off the stage and you met him backstage to congratulate him properly, after a final performance the night came to an end and everyone headed outside the arena to celebrate.
"Do you feel like partying tonight? The label is throwing a celebration but if you feel tired we can skip it," Harry said as you both sat on the back of his Range Rover.
"Honestly, I just want to go home, kiss our baby goodnight and celebrate with my Grammy winner husband in private," you smiled at him teasingly, "Maybe get started on that second baby making."
The smile that appeared on Harry's face after hearing your words was bigger than the one from winning a Grammy.
"Home it is, then."
#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles imagine#harry styles writing#harry styles fluff#harry styles fake instagram#harry styles one shot#harry styles blurb#harry styles x reader#harry styles x you#harry styles headcanon#harry styles fic#harry styles au#harry styles fake social media#harry styles story#harrysfolklore#harry styles masterlist#harry styles fic rec#harry styles grammy#1k
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i don’t deserve you
//
Luke Hughes x Reader
authors note: i wrote this super quick and also on my phone so idk the word count or if this even makes sense because it is unedited lmaooo but I hope you enjoy it!
-
You had just hopped out of the shower and were putting on uour leggings and one of lukes hoodies to wear for the day.
You hadnt really been wearing anything besides for lukes hoodies when you have a day at home since you two started dating so honestly it was nothing new.
Going back to your room after cleaning up the rest of your stuff in the bathroom, you remembered you forgot to text Luke back last night. he always gets on you about that but you always forget how worried he gets when you don’t reply to his calls or texts.
And when you head to look at your phone that’s plugged into the charger on your bedside table, you see many missed notifications from your worried boyfriend.
(4 missed called from: Lukey @ 10:37am)
Lukey: hey you said you’d call me at 10?
Lukey: call me back pls
it was now nearing 12:00pm and you knew he would be more than a little bit pissed off that you weren’t answering him.
and you felt terrible about forgetting so you unplug your phone and called him back right away, sat on your bed with a towel around yojr hair as the phone rings in suspense.
“baby? ...let me guess? you forgot to check your phone again?..” he quickly says as you are getting more comfortable on the bed, relieved he had answered your call.
You just hum in response as he pours out his concern to you, knowing that all he’s saying is true.
“i’m so so sorry. i completely forgot. i know you’re looking out for me but i fell asleep without texting and i literally just got out of the shower.” You say and hear him sigh at your words.
“Luke i promise i’ll try to keep my phone close by cuz i know you worry...but i’m fine i promise” you say apologetically .
“i didn’t get murdered or anything..” you add jokingly but quickly follow up with an “i’m kidding...” before luke gets a chance to be a smart ass and tell you not to joke about that.
You laugh a little hearing him sigh with an unamused tone in his voice.
“anyway, how are you?” You ask trying to move on from the subject knowing he is already annoyed about you not answering his calls.
“i really miss you...” he sighs out and you hear the little bit of sadness in his voice and instantly feel exactly how he’s feeling.
“i miss you more bubs...trust me time will fly by way faster than you know it…we’ll see each other soon..i promise.” You reassure him, not trying to sound too cheesy but also trying to lift his spirits somewhat.
it’s been over 2 months since you’ve seen each other last. School has picked up and made it impossible to be able to visit him in jersey, even just for a weekend.
You were starting to forget a time where it actually was easy to see each other.
And you were getting so used to late night phone calls to one another, and luke sending you random long ass text messages about how much he misses you at random hours of the night. and you being so fed up with everything that you cave and just call him even when you know he’s busy or at practice, because you miss hearing his voice so much.
“it’s just been so long since i’ve seen your face. ugh i hate this shit so much. i’m just... so fucking over it.” Luke continues pouring out and his words are laced with a bit of anger, causing his voice to have a scratchy and dark quality.
he’s clearly getting more and more frustrated about the current situation the longer it goes on and you know he’s getting irritated with only being able to talk on the phone and over facetime. we both are.
“Luke i understand... i miss you and i love you so much. And look, i know you’re upset but there’s really not much we can do about it right now is there?” You say before luke interrupts you with a loud sigh.
“hey what can i do though? huh? ...how can i help you feel better?” You ask with as much reassurance in your voice as possible, trying hard to keep your voice high and uplifting even though youre feeling just as down and unhappy as he is right now.
he doesn’t answer and you are sat in silence for too long to still be expecting him to answer your question.
“what’s on your mind? Will u just talk to me?” You ask innocently.
“ugh. fuck! i don’t know! nothing i guess.” Luke sighs out, raising his voice and catching you off guard.
“i’m just trying to help … can you calm down a little..” you say quietly because you know he was probably wound up about a lot of stuff on his mind and you can tell that he is putting his anger in the wrong places.
“you don’t need to tell me to calm down...there’s nothing you can do ok? it’s fucking awful. i hate this...fuck..” he spits out at me. “can we just talk about something else?” he asks with his voice still raised.
“look, im not trying to force you to talk to me if you don’t want to but you called me and clearly something is on your mind..whether it’s the fact that we can’t be together right now or something else but you can’t just get angry with me for no reason.” You say sternly and hear him about to say something more but you interrupt him “just please lower your voice...” you add.
“i’m not getting angry. i’m just really fucking annoyed and you’re not helping” he says exasperatedly and you are taken by surprise with his words and a little pissed off that he’s taking out whatever he is angry about at you.
You stay silent on the other end of the phone as his words instantly put tears into yohr eyes and you don’t say anything because he is being so unnecessarily rude to you.
“i’m sorry, i’m just having a really fucking bad day...” he adds and you hold your breath trying to not make your shaky breathing noticeable as he keep talking.
You begin to feel the tears slowly start to stream down your face but you quickly blink them away knowing he’s only mad about the situation and not worth yours tears. but his words made you feel so so hurt.
there’s silence between the both of you for a few seconds as you try to get yourself together and acknowledge that he hurt you.
“Ok. Im not gonna sit here and listen to you complain about something that i literally cannot fix or change right now. i’m sorry you’re feeling upset and angry with what’s going on but you can’t just call me and take all your fucking anger out on me. it’s just not fair. i really miss you too ok? ...i’m sorry we can’t be together right now but i can’t do anything to help if you’re not going to tell me what’s actually wrong...just...call me back when you calm down a little” you say trying your hardest to not raise your voice and lash out exactly like he just did to you.
he’s quiet on the other side of the phone and you hear him about to reply as you hang up the phone before he has the chance to respond, knowing you are probably not going to like or want to hear what he has to say to you at this moment anyway.
this isn’t the first conversation that’s went like this recently. this past week luke has been getting more and more pissed off and angry rather than just upset about you not being able to see each other right now and it’s not doing you any good.
Youve been trying your hardest to just hear him out and be there for him but today’s conversation was different, usually you share a mutual sadness about not being able to see each other and talk about all the things you miss and then it cheers you both up hearing all the fun things you can do together once exams and the hockey season ends.
but today luke wouldn’t even tell you what was bothering him without getting mad and it didn’t help that he was putting his anger towards you.
Feeling really frustrated about that conversation, you plug your phone back into the charger and start to feel a slight sinking in your stomach.
You hated the fact that you just hung up on him and didn’t resolve your discussion. And you knkw it was his fault for getting angry at you but can’t help but feel a little guilty for just hanging up the phone without saying goodbye.
to get your mind off of it for a while you start tidying up your room and play some music to drown out the silence.
Now it’s almost nearing 2pm and luke hasn’t called back or even texted and it’s been almost an hour.
You begin to get more and more pissed off that he hasn’t said anything and consider just sending him a text but you remember the things he said to you . so you ignore the feeling and continue waiting for him to call you back.
-
After deciding to lay down and read a book to distract yourself, you accidentally fell asleep for a few hours. Waking up to see that it’s around 6pm...you definitely slept longer than you should have.
Surprisingly, you see that luke tried calling back and left a few texts as well.
Lukey: hi
Lukey: i’m really sorry about earlier
Lukey: can you call me back please? i need to apologize...i didn’t mean to get upset at you. i know none of this is your fault
Lukey: please call me back
You decide not to answer him right away and start making yourself some mac and cheese and sitting at the dining room table waiting as you wait for the water to boil.
You were beginning to get so impatient. Impatient with everything, but especially with luke. You wanted him to call you again. Do something, say something. Try harder.
Your thoughts were spiraling and you knew calling him back was really the only way to stop them.
After finishing making and eating your dinner you sit down at the couch to finally call luke back. at this point your stupid argument definitely didn’t feel worth all this and you felt a little guilty for ignoring him all day long.
You ultimately decide to facetime him so you can see his face and he answers you on the second ring.
immediately you see him laying down in his bed wearing no shirt and his wet hair hanging down his face on one side and his face slightly smushed against his pillow.
he smiles at you knowingly and waits for you to say something so that he knows if i’m still angry at him or not.
“why are you staring at me?” You blush a little, ignoring your anger for a moment. he just smiles back at you with his pretty little face and completely ignores the question.
Luke sees you awkward laugh a little feeling a bit insecure with the way he’s staring at you, but he continues. and he laughs lightly as he sits up and turns the light on so that you can see him better.
“i’m really really sorry baby...” he starts “i’m sorry for getting upset at you. I shouldn’t have done that. i was just so fed up and tired of not being able to see you and i let my feelings get the best of me, i also was just having a really shitty day. Practice fucking sucked today and you already know how shitty our game has been lately.” He says with honest sincerity and regret in his voice.
“i took my anger out at you which i should not have done...and im really not trying to make any excuses because I know i hurt you. And i promise i won’t get mad at you about this ever again, especially since you did absolutely nothing wrong...” he spills out apologetically.
You say nothing at first and just wait for him to continue his apology. making it clear to him that he was completely out of hand and you are not gonna put up with his bitchy attitude. And he continues,
“... to be honest i’ve been feeling like you don’t miss me as much as i miss you which sounds stupid but i just got so angry because i didn’t understand. When you forget to call or text i just…i take it hard..” he says trailing off at the end.
“what? luke i’ve been trying so hard to keep it together for you because i know how upset this makes you. trust me when i tell you i miss you more than anything...i suck at remembering things like texting goodnight and stuff because I’ve just been so exhausted with work and school. You’re on my mind all the time and i promise you that i will try harder to not forget those things.” you quickly reply, making sure he understands just how much you mean it.
“i love you so much.” You add and smile at him as uou see his small smile on your phone screen.
“i love you too baby. i’m so sorry for getting mad..” he says quietly and puts his head down a little.
“it’s ok...i understand your frustration.” You add with a little laugh letting him know you’re over it.
“i saw your instagram story..” you change the subject and he smiles at you with his face getting a bit red.
“You posted us?” You say knowingly as he smirks at you and runs his hands through his hair.
Luke had posted a slightly blurry photo of the two of you on the boat last summer saying he misses both the summer and you. It made you melt to see him gush about you, especially because he was typically such a private person.
“You are so cute..” you say honestly. and youstart to laugh a little remembering that night on the boat together and how it was the night luke asked you to be his girlfriend.
Luke wasnt always the most romantic person but he put so much thought into that night, his words, every little thing he planned he put so much care into and it was such a beautiful moment.
You would never forget it.
“im glad you saw it. i wanted to show you how much you mean to me..and how sorry i was.” he chuckles and it makes you softly laugh, knowing the world would have no idea that post was technically an apology to you.
“will you stay on FaceTime with me tonight? i miss falling asleep with you…” you ask politely and luke nods his head and smiles at you.
“of course...” he replies.
“i’m glad you’re not mad at me anymore baby” He says quietly.
“I could never stay mad at you..” you say knowing how true of a statement it honestly was.
“...and I don’t deserve you” luke says almost in a whisper, seemingly more to himself as opposed to you
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#devils lb#nj devils#nhl#luke hughes#new jersey devils#hockey blurb#hockey imagine#luke hughes fluff#luke hughes x reader#luke hughes fic#luke hughes angst#luke hughes imagine#nj devils imagine#hockey x reader#hockeyblr
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My Little Love
Chapter 38
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x enhanced!Reader
Word Count: 6.4K
Warnings: I don't want to add to many warnings and give away the plot so read with caution, Henry and Charlotte being the sweet little duo they are, crying
A/N: the time has finally come to see what's going to happen next with our favorite family.... Idk how to feel about this chapter but it needed to happen so we can keep moving forward.
Series Masterlist:
Henry laid awake after you left. He worried about you. Even at his young age he could tell something was not quite right with the way you had been behaving. He also didn’t like the fact that his dad didn’t know you’d be going on a mission.
There was only one thing he could do and he only hoped you wouldn’t be mad at him. But Henry would rather have an angry mama than none at all. So he slipped out of his bed and Lottie’s grip on his shirt so that he could put shoes on.
“Bubba?” Lottie’s sleepy voice called from behind him. “Whe-uh you going?”
“I have to do something for mama.”
“You call daddy?”
Henry sighed and turned to look at Lottie, she was now sitting up in bed and rubbing the sleep from her eyes with the back of her hand.
“Yes. I think mama is going to need help.”
“I go with you?” Lottie asks, getting out of bed.
“You should stay here with grandpa.”
Lottie shakes her head. “I go with you.”
“Fine, go get your shoes and be as quiet as you can.”
“Kay.”
Henry meets Lottie in the hallway. He takes her hand and turns them both invisible before quietly going down the stairs. In the living room Eddie has the tv on even though it’s still dark out. His head is tilted backwards resting against the back of the couch while he snored peacefully. Henry places a finger of his lips to make sure Lottie knows she needs to be quiet. They leave out of the front door.
“Ok baby, I’ll give you a piggyback ride because we have to be fast.” Henry tells his sister before turning and lowering himself.
Lottie climbs on Henry’s back and locks her legs around her brother’s midsection. Her arms wrap over his shoulders.
“You ready?”
“Am weady.” Lottie says with a nod.
“Ok, hold on tight.” Henry says and he starts running towards the compound.
****
They knock furiously on the door to the communications room. It’s only after a few minutes that it swings open.
“Hi Ms. Maria.” Henry looks up at Maria Hill who’s in charge of running the operation from the comms room.
“Henry, what are you two doing here? Where’s Y/N? Is Lottie having another vision?”
“No but I need to talk to daddy. It’s important.” Henry’s eyes are pleading and Lottie is matching him.
“Ok, come in but you’ll have to wait, they’re still on the mission. I’ll let you talk to him as soon as I can.” Maria says, opening the door wider and ushering the kids in.
It takes a few minutes but eventually they hear Steve’s voice crackle through.
“Mission was a success. Everyone’s back on the jet and we’re on our way home.”
The small group in the room cheered. Maria heads to one of the stations and speaks to the person manning it before picking up the mic and headphones.
“Sergeant Barnes, please switch to channel 3.” She says.
“Everything ok Hill?”
“I’m not sure, Henry needs to speak to you and it couldn’t wait.” Maria says before handing the mic and headphones over.
“Daddy?”
“Hey bubs, what’s going on? Where’s mama?” Bucky tried not to let his panic be heard in his voice.
“Mama went on a mission. She told me not to tell you but baby had a vision about it and I’m worried. Baby said there was a mean lady.”
Bucky sucked in a sharp breath. It couldn’t be who he thought it was but he also had to trust your judgment.
“Daddy?”
“Hi doll. Can you tell me who you saw?”
“Daddy it was mama’s mama. I membuh fwom my biwthday.”
Bucky pinched the bridge of his nose and tried to take some calming breaths but that was only getting attention from the team.
“Do you know where she went?” He asked anyone who was listening.
“She took a jet Barnes. We are sending you the location now.” Hill jumped in.
“Thank you, Hill. Kids, is grandpa watching you?”
“Yeah.” Henry said quietly after taking the mic back.
“I’m assuming he doesn’t know where you are. Please go back home. I’m gonna go help mama and I’ll see you later. And don’t tell grandpa anything about this, it’s a secret for now.”
Both kids say their goodbye and the line drops. Hill tries her best to give them a reassuring smile. The kids leave and sneak back into the house and Henry’s room without their grandpa ever noticing they were gone.
“Well it took you long enough to come find me.” Your mother says. She has a pleased look on her face as she takes a seat. “Did you finally come to your senses? Or are you going to kill me?”
You stare at her for a moment, really taking her in. It’s alarming to realize that this is who she always was. She had never hid herself behind the role of a sweet and loving homemaker, at least not in front of you.
“I’m not going to kill you.” You say calmly.
“Still weak I see. No matter, we can work that right out of your system this time.”
“Yeah, how will you manage to do that?”
Your mother’s smile is sinister. It sends a shiver down your spine.
“Do you really think I didn’t know you were here before I walked in? You tripped an alarm. At any moment my backup will be here.” She laughs as if she’s won, as if she has the upper hand. “I have so many plans for you. Things I didn’t get to finish the first time round.”
You smile back. From one of the pockets of your utility belt you pull up four different dog tags, all of them covered in blood.
“You mean the idiots that live down the hill? I mean, lived down the hill. I paid them a visit first and I cut the alarm in the cabin just in case there was anyone else wandering around.”
Lorraine’s face morphed from smug to absolute rage. She was fuming and you were satisfied that you’d managed to catch her off guard.
“What were you planning to do with Luke and the twins? Were you going to kidnap them? What about Olivia?” You ask, you motioned to the files on the coffee table.
“I’ve had to come up with backup plans. Since you’ve been nothing but a disappointment.” She spat with all the fury she had. She stands and tries to loom over you but the tactic doesn’t scare you anymore. “You would’ve been dead if it wasn’t for me. I gave you the only thing that makes you special.”
“You’ve done nothing but abuse me. You are a sick and twisted person.”
“And you’re an ungrateful brat.”
Her right hand came up to strike you across the face but you blocked and batted it away before pushing her back. It was hard enough that she tripped and fell over the coffee table taking some of the files with her. Metal ropes slithered across the area rug from you to her. They wrapped around her arms, neck down her back and around her waist, lifting her back onto the couch. The now solid metal kept her in place.
“For as much as you loved to call me pathetic, look at you now. You’re nothing. Hydra is nothing.” You growled, standing up from your seat.
“Hydra will rise again. It always does and they’ll come for you and your stupid little family. We will have what is rightfully ours again.”
“No! Hydra ends with you. It ended a long time ago you and the rest of those maniacs were just grasping at straws. You are nothing, no one will ever remember you because you didn’t do anything great.”
“I am the greatest mind Hydra has.” Lorraine screamed, writhing as she tried to break free. With each movement the restraints got tighter.
“Then why did they send you to have babies for them? You were useless to them. You had no purpose your own father thought that.”
She stopped moving. Lorraine was panting as she stayed still, eyes closed.
“Your father didn’t think you were anything special. You were ordinary, just one of the bunch. He thought the world of Henry though, didn’t he? Same thing with Lottie. They were his pride and joy. He saw them as the true future of hydra. They were everything he wanted in a child. Before he died he even treated them very well. But you? You were the disappointment of the family. He had no use for you, at least not until you got pregnant. I read all about what he thought of you. How he was glad to finally get rid of you so he could focus on what he had created.” You say. Your voice is eerily calm, it sounds strange to your own ears. There’s a sense of satisfaction in watching the woman who tormented you for years breakdown. You lean down into her space and look her in the eye. “How does it feel that even your own husband and children would prefer them over you?”
She lets out a blood curdling screech. “I did what I had to do in order to prove my loyalty. You would be nothing if it weren’t for me and this is how you repay me? You wouldn’t have your precious family and your precious Bucky if it weren’t for me.” She grits out. “The things we did to him. The way he cried and screamed and begged. He was such a great little play thing. Almost as fun as you were. But it doesn’t matter, once I’m done with you I’ll get my hands on him and those snot nosed brats and then I’ll really make them suffer. I’ll make you watch so you learn what I’m capable of.”
That had you seeing red. It was bad enough to understand what they went through but to hear it from your own mother’s mouth made you sick. Instinctively the metal you were holding her back with tightened even more. She gasped for air before she began laughing. It was bone chilling and sinister.
“I-I knew you h-had...” She begins but cuts herself off by coughing. “Had it in you.” Blood pools in the corners of her mouth as she finally looks at you. Her eyes are bewildered, as if she finally had gotten what she wanted.
“What?”
“You we-re always me-meant to be the p-p-perfect killing machine.” She stutters before she laughs again. “We are the same, we-we are both killers now. The p-p-pride of Hydra.” She cries what you assume are happy tears. “O-our lega-legacy w-will live th-through you.”
As you realize what she meant you gasp. The metal that had been restraining her falls to the ground in small round pellets. She lay motionless on the couch. Some blood drips from her nose and mouth.
You fell to the ground. Your eyes stuck to your mother’s motionless body. How could you have done that? Sure you had killed before but it had been in self defense. This time you let her get under your skin like she always had. You thought you had the upper hand but she played you. How would you tell your family?
****
You spent a few hours in a daze. Unsure of what to do. You didn’t even realize there was movement in front of you until two hands wrapped around your neck.
“Weak and pathetic. You couldn’t even finish the job. I didn’t suffer through childbirth and family holidays and school and those stupid recitals and sport games just for you to quit on me now.” Lorraine, your mother was choking you. Part of you didn’t know if you should fight back. It was so surreal. “Do it. Turn into what I made you.”
You scrambled to your feet in an effort to have the upper hand. Her grip was tight, nails digging into your flesh. You slipped your fingers in between her hands and your neck. The look on her face was terrifying. She sneered, her eyes almost black from rage. You weren’t sure where she got the strength to hold you down.
“Stop.” You hissed.
“Make me.” Lorraine leans in, her face inches away from yours. “We could rule the world. There is so much you’re capable of and I can teach you. You are meant to be the new fist of hydra. You’ll bring us into a new age but only if you give in.”
“It doesn’t have to be like this. You don’t have to do this. I can get you help, you can see our family again. Do you really not care about them? Hydra doesn't care about you but we do.”
Lorraine scoffs. “No one has ever cared about me. You don’t have to be a lost cause. You just can’t see what I do. The world could lay at our feet, we could rule everything. We could be the most powerful people in the world. Why must you settle if you were made for such a great purpose? You could influence the ways of the world, hydra could continue to live through you.” She states. It’s all she cares about, the power and influence. She was a lost cause long before you were ever even born.
You stare her down for a moment and shake your head. “Hydra dies tonight. If it has to die with me, then so be it.”
Lorraine lets out a mixture of a groan and a screech of frustration. One of her hands lets go and she reaches behind her. You put your focus on the metal that is lying around and pull it towards you in order to use it to defend yourself. Lorraine holds a blade and brings it down toward your chest.
Pop.
Pop.
Pop.
Three quick gunshots. Two to the heart and one to the head. Lorraine’s eyes widen for a second and then she drops at your feet. From the darkness of the hallway Bucky steps out, gun still in hand.
“Are you ok?” He asks hesitantly.
You nod. “It’s over.” You murmur in disbelief.
Bucky rushes over when he sees the tears in your eyes. He doesn’t hesitate to bring you in for a comforting hug as you start to sob.
“It’s ok, Sugar. I got you.” He murmurs.
It took you some time to compose yourself. But in your defense you had gone from thinking you killed your own mother to her trying to kill you to your fiancé killing her instead. You didn’t even want to hurt her, that hadn’t been your intention at all.
“Let’s get out of here.” Bucky didn’t give you a chance to protest. He manhandled you and took you outside.
Taking gulps of fresh air, you began to cry again when you saw Steve standing a few feet away. Bucky pushed you in his direction before going back to the cabin.
“Are you hurt?” Steve’s words are dripping with concern as he makes his way to you. “Whatever you need, I’m here for you.”
You didn’t answer. No one you knew had ever been in this position so they wouldn’t understand. You watched as Bucky walked out with your mother’s body wrapped in a blanket. He was gentle with her as he set her down and headed back inside. It made you want to throw up and you did. Steve held you up, offered you a bottle of water from a bag he had been carrying. It didn’t stop the sick feeling in your gut. Bucky walks back out with all of the files in hand.
“Let’s go.” Bucky says, handing Steve the files and trusting he’d help you back to the jet while taking the responsibility of carrying your mother.
You sat quietly in the jet. Every few minutes you’d look to the side and see your dead mother laying there. The more you looked at her the angrier you got. Everything she’d put you through was just for power.
“Hey,” Bucky called softly as he sat next to you, blocking your view. “How are you feeling?”
“I don’t know. Sad? Angry? Relieved?”
Bucky’s hand cups your cheek, his thumb moving back and forth. You can see the sadness reflected in his eyes.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t want to do that but when I saw that knife I had to act fast.”
“It’s not your fault, you were only protecting me and I’ll always love you for that.” You say quietly before turning your head and kissing the palm of his hand. “How did you know I was here anyways?”
“Henry went to Hill and asked to talk to me, he told me everything. He was worried about you. Lottie had a vision of your mom. Hill tracked the jet.” Bucky responds. “We had the team redirect here. Steve over there just had to join me to try and steal my thunder.”
“Hey, she was my friend before she was the love of your life.”
You give him a small smile. Steve gets up from the pilot’s seat and sits across from you. He pats your knee reassuringly.
“Bucky told me about your mom. I’m sorry you went through all of that. Especially when it was someone that was supposed to protect you.”
You give him a small nod. There wasn’t much you could say. Your thoughts were on how and exactly what you were going to tell your family. The relationship you had with them could change forever in the next few hours.
“Everything will be ok. I’m staying right by your side.” Bucky murmured as he pulled you in.
Steve and Bucky looked at each other for a moment, a silent understanding that they’d need to be there for you. While Bucky held you Steve went back to the pilot’s chair. It would be a few more hours until you got home and then you’d have to face your family.
You turned the corner into the long hallway that led to many conference rooms with determination. Towards the end of the flight you’d decided that what’s done is done. Lorraine had made her choices and you’d made yours. The only thing you could do was tell your family the truth and give them the evidence you had and let them decide what they wanted to do. You couldn’t control their reactions but you could control yours.
Halfway down the hallway Henry and Lottie sat outside one of the rooms. Their feet kicked back and forth as they waited. Lottie was mumbling something and patting Henry on the arm in a comforting manner. It made you genuinely smile to see them like this.
Lottie saw you first and jumped off her seat in order to get to you. Her arms open wide, her pink teddy bear in one hand. Lottie launched herself into your waiting arms. You pulled her close and even gave her a little squeeze. She rewarded you by peppering kisses over your cheek.
“You is kay mama?” Lottie asked once she pulled back. Her finger traced your cheek, up and over your brow and down your nose before ending the delicate touch with a small ‘boop’.
“I am more than ok now my sweet Angel.”
She smiles when you lean down and kiss her forehead. Your attention then turns to Henry who is standing not too far from you. The telltale signs of his nervousness present as he fluctuates in his invisibility. You reach out for him and he slowly makes his way to you. As you hold him, his form stays visible and he relaxes into your hug.
“Mama, I’m sorry I know you di-“
“Never apologize for doing the right thing.” You cut him off while pulling away to look at him. “You followed your instincts and it was the right call, ok?”
Henry nods before giving you one more hug.
“Can you stay out here with your sister while I talk to our family?”
“Yeah.”
“Thank you, sweet boy.”
You stand and take a deep breath. It was now or never. You had asked Bucky to make sure your family was at the compound by the time you got there. Steve was still with you when you walked in the room but he stayed in a corner, he was there more for moral support than anything else.
With Bucky’s help you managed to get the blood off of you but you didn’t look great. Eddie was the first one out of his chair to hug you. Luke, Sofia and Josh followed soon after before settling back down in their chairs. You sit across the four of them and you feel sick to your stomach knowing what you have to do.
“So before I start you have to know that what I’m going to say is very serious. I’m not joking about this situation. It’s going to be difficult to understand and even accept but I have proof to back up what I’m going to tell you.” You take a deep breath. “I also need you all to listen to everything I have to say.”
“Kitten, what is going on?”
“I need to tell you about what happened to me when hydra captured me last year. Specifically I need to tell you about who was responsible for everything.” You say as you grab the laptop in the middle of the table and connect the usb with all the evidence.
You look over at Steve and then Bucky. Both of them giving you a nod to reassure you that they had your back. With one more calming breath you turn back to your family and begin to explain everything.
****
“So our mom and her family were involved with hydra?” Sofia asked after everything was said. By the tone in her voice you knew she had trouble believing you.
“Yes. They were involved for generations. They were responsible for Henry, Lottie and the other kids. They were trying to create a new generation of soldiers.”
“And she had us with the intention of using us to create more soldiers?” It was Joshua’s turn to question you.
You can only nod in response. Meanwhile Luke sits silently as he looks through the files you had given him. One for him, Molly, Olivia and their unborn baby. In the margins were the plans Lorraine had for them.
Next to Luke sat your father. It looked like he was going to be sick. It was one thing to learn that your wife had treated one of your kids differently but it was another to realize you didn’t know the monster you had married. As he read his own file and even glanced over at Luke’s, Eddie wished he didn’t know any of this.
“Dad?” You called him softly, worried that he might actually be sick. Maybe his heart couldn’t handle this.
“Y/N,” he said quietly. It hurt to hear him call you by your name and not the affectionate nickname he had given you. “Why didn’t you tell us sooner?”
“I was scared. I didn’t have enough evidence and I needed for you to believe me. Especially after I was taken. She was power hungry and she was willing to do anything to gain control of hydra.”
“But you could have said something to me.”
“Would you have believed me?” You ask. “Would any of you have believed what I said after I was rescued? I had been mentally and physically tortured. My autonomy had been taken from me. Anything I said at that time would have been questionable.”
Your family didn’t say anything. The tension was slowly rising in the room and then the one question you didn’t want to answer was asked.
“Where is she now?” Sofia asks.
You take a deep breath and close your eyes. The pain you felt from her death would surely be different than theirs but part of you still felt the loss in some weird way.
“She’s gone.”
“What do you mean? Did she escape or something?” Joshua speaks up.
Joshua and Sofia had been treated the best by her. Maybe she had found a little bit of maternal love for them in the cold and twisted heart she had.
“No, I mean she’s gone, she died.” You deliver the news as gently as possible.
The truth hangs in the air and for the first time since reuniting it feels like your family is broken again. Your eyes stay glued to the table as you wait for their reactions. The only comfort you have is Bucky’s hand in yours.
“You killed her.” It wasn’t a question or an accusation. Eddie just came to the realization much more quickly than your siblings had.
“How could you kill her? She was still your mother.”
“I-It’s complicated. I only wanted to bring her in. I gave her a choice.“
“But you killed her.” Sofia accuses.
“I killed her.” Bucky speaks up and everyone’s attention turns to him. “It was a life or death situation and I had to choose between Lorraine and Y/N. I did what I had to do to protect Y/N.”
“You couldn’t have knocked her unconscious or something?”
“She was choking Y/N. If I didn’t act fast this would be a completely different conversation.” Bucky defends himself. “Y/N’s safety was my priority. I’m sorry I really am but I did what I had to do.”
Sofia gets up first, followed by Joshua and Luke. They take the files you gave them and leave, not saying another word to you. It crushed you to see how Lorraine had broken your family. Finally Eddie gets up and starts to walk out.
“Dad?”
“Let me handle this, I’ll talk to you soon.” Your father says and follows your siblings.
Bucky pulls you into his chest. He comforts you while you cry. He whispers sweet reassurances as he guides you out of the conference room. The kids follow as Bucky takes you home.
Bucky had ushered the kids into the playroom before pulling you along to your shared room. He didn’t say much as he helped you undress and sent you in to take a shower. Once you walked out Bucky got you into bed. He’d offered to stay with you but you wanted to be alone so he gave you space.
It had been a difficult few days. Bucky could see the worry and anxiety grow with every moment that you didn’t hear from your father. You paced, you zoned out and you slept, nothing else. Not only was Bucky worried but so were the kids and the team. He’d even taken over making the final decisions on some things for the wedding. Not that he minded but he missed the excitement in your eyes as you talked about how great the day was going to be. All Bucky could do was be there for you, hold you while you cried and reassure you that you did nothing wrong. He shouldered the burden of having killed your mother so that you wouldn’t feel guilty about it for the rest of your life. But if you asked him, he’d do it again as long as it meant that you were safe by his side.
The kids also saw how down you were. They missed their mama. It was actually Henry’s idea to do something to cheer you up. So while you’d been sitting outside at Bucky’s insistence, he and the kids prepared a surprise for you. When you walked into your room you were surprised to find Henry and Lottie running out of your bathroom giggling.
“What are you up to?” You asked with a small smile for the first time in days.
“You’re just in time mama. Come look.”
Henry takes your hand and pulls you into your bathroom. You find Bucky putting some finishing touches to a bubble bath.
“What is going on?” You ask while looking around at the lit candles and bathtub.
“We wanted to do something special for you.” Henry says before holding his hand up for you to see what he’s holding. “You can even use my boat so you don’t get bored.”
“An my duckies mama.”
You turn around to see Lottie holding up her little basket of rubber duckies. Most of them are dressed as the Avengers, your own duckie included. You wanted to cry again. For as much as you worried that your siblings hated you again, your family was right there showing you all the love you could ever need.
“The-uh you go mama.” Lottie says after dumping the duckies into the bath.
Bucky ushered the kids out before telling you to relax and giving you a quick kiss.
****
Downstairs Bucky, Henry and Lottie rushed around trying to get another surprise ready for you. This had been Lottie’s idea. She had seen what happened and had been distraught but having you home eased her worries. Now all she wanted was to see her mama happy.
“Hold this here.” Bucky held up a string of lights for Henry.
“Like this?”
“Just like that bubs. Doll, grab that pillow and put it over there.” Lottie rushed around doing as she was told.
The three of them freeze when they hear the door to your room open and close.
“It’s not weady.” Lottie looked at Bucky, panicked.
“I need like a minute. Go distract mama.” Bucky tells Lottie and she rushes out of the living room.
She finds you at the bottom of the stairs.
“Mama wook ovuh the-uh.” She points to a random spot behind you.
You turn to look at the wall and try not to laugh. Then you turn back to look at her with furrowed brows.
“What am I supposed to be looking at?”
“Uh,” Lottie looks distraught as she tries to think of something. “It’s just so pwetty?”
“The wall is pretty?” You say teasingly while looking back at the blank wall.
You hear whispering but you can’t see where it’s coming from so you assume Henry is just invisible. Lottie looks up at you and smiles.
“Kay mama come on.” She takes your hand and pulls you in the direction of the living room.
You stop in your tracks when you see the lights and pillow fort. Bucky and Henry stand in the middle of the room smiling at you. The tv was on and an episode of the Golden Girls was ready to go.
“Is this for me?”
“Yeah.” Lottie nods as she looks up at you. “It’s a suwpwise. I don’t wike it when mama is sad.”
That alone made you want to cry again. Instead you scoop Lottie up and hug her while walking towards Bucky and Henry. They join in on the hug and then you all find a comfortable place to sit.
Lottie stays on your lap, Bucky sits next to you on the floor while Henry lounges on the couch behind you. He has his arm hanging over your shoulder. Even Alpine joins in for cuddles. The show plays but you can’t focus on it. All you can do is think about your sweet family and the fact that they’d do anything to make you happy the same way you'd do it for them. So you sit back and enjoy the moment pushing all the bad memories from the last few days out of your mind.
The sun was starting to set as you were all still sitting together in the living room. You’d changed the show for a movie while the kids did some coloring. Your head was resting against Bucky’s shoulder as you yawned. Bucky was just about to suggest calling it a night when the doorbell rang.
“Who the hell could it be at this hour?” Bucky mutters as he stands and makes his way to the door.
There’s a hushed conversation before Bucky walks back. Behind him is Eddie. You tense and immediately you turn your gaze away from him. The kids, who usually ran towards their grandfather, stayed put. Everyone could feel the heaviness in the air.
“Can we talk?” Is all your father asks so you get up and lead him outside to the back porch.
Both of you sit in silence side by side, not knowing what to say. His expression was unreadable. It was one of the few times he ever concealed his feelings from you.
“How are they?”
“How are you?”
You asked at the same time. Eddie looked over at you, taking in your profile. He could see the tension in your shoulders and the way you clenched your jaw. He could see how exhausted you were.
“Kitten.” Eddie said softly and you finally looked at him. You had never seen him look this tired or defeated.
“How are they?”
“Upset, confused, angry.”
You nod and look away. “I’m sorry for not saying anything but you have to understand why I did what I did.”
Eddie pats your shoulder before pulling you in for a hug. This time you don’t cry though. You’re done crying over this.
“Kitten, I’m not blaming you.”
“They are. And I get it, I do. I’d also understand if you did too. She was your wife and you were together for so long.”
“That woman was not my wife.” Eddie says. His tone is sad but resigned. “I was married to a stranger my whole life. She was a great actress though, I’ll tell you that much.”
You didn’t reply. What could you possibly say to him to ease the pain he was surely feeling?
“Lorraine brought this on herself. As long as you tried to bring her in, alive, you have nothing to feel guilty about. She wasn’t a good person, kitten. I can see that now. You did what you had to do as an Avenger trying to protect innocent people and then as a mother trying to protect your family. You gave her a choice and she chose wrong. That doesn’t fall on you.”
“Thanks dad.” You say between quiet sniffles. He hugs you tighter. “As long as you don’t hate me.”
“I could never hate you, you’re my girl.”
You close your eyes and smile. He’s told you that all your life. The two of you sit in comfortable silence, holding each other and watching the sunset.
“The funeral is tomorrow.” He said quietly, long after the last rays of sun had disappeared.
“Oh.”
“You should come, be there for your siblings. I think it could be good for the four of you.”
“It wouldn’t.” You pull away from him. “She was their mother, not mine. I think I would just make it worse by showing up.”
Eddie nods. “I understand, Kitten. I thought I would offer just in case. But don’t worry, your siblings will come around soon. They love you all.” He pats your thigh before getting up.
You have one question. But you aren’t sure if you should ask. If it’s even appropriate. But seeing as your father knew you well, he stops before opening the door and turns to you again.
“I hope this doesn’t change anything for the wedding. I’d still love to walk you down the aisle.”
You look up at him, tears in your eyes and a smile on your lips. You give him a small nod. Eddie gets closer again and places a kiss on your forehead and leaves.
Inside, Bucky meets Eddie at the bottom of the stairs after putting the kids to bed. Eddie stretches his hand to Bucky who seems surprised at the gesture.
“Thank you for bringing her back.”
“Of course. I know it must be hard on Luke, Joshua and Sofia to just accept the death of their mother and not be able to bury her.”
Eddie looks at Bucky confused before shaking his head. “No, I meant Y/N. I knew you’d keep her safe.”
“With my life Ed. Listen about Lorraine- I really didn’t-“
Eddie raises a hand to stop Bucky. “You don’t have to explain yourself, you were protecting our girl, that’s all that matters. From what I’ve read in those files, she had it coming. If you hadn’t done it Lorraine would have kept coming after her. You not only kept Y/N safe but the rest of my family.” Eddie places a hand on Bucky’s shoulder and looks him in the eye. “You protected our family. Never apologize or feel guilty about it.”
Bucky only nods understanding that Eddie was including him as part of his family.
“To be honest, and I mean this in the best way possible, I’m glad it was you that did it and not her. She would have carried that guilt for the rest of her life.”
“I’d do it again, if I had to.” Bucky reassures the man in front of him.
“Good. Well I’ll get going now. See you at the wedding.”
Bucky smiles and nods, following Eddie to the door and closing it behind the older man. When he turns he sees you walking around and turning off lights before making your way towards him. He smiles as you throw yourself into his arms.
“Let’s go to bed.” He says softly, feeling as you take a deep breath and exhale.
You practically melt against Bucky as you nod. Bucky kisses the top of your head as his hold on you tightens. He doesn’t let you go, instead Bucky leans down and hooks his hands around the back of your knees. You wrap your legs around his waist as he makes his way up the stairs while carrying you to your shared room.
Bucky lays you down and you laugh while he tucks you in. “Do you want me to read you a bedtime story?”
“Shut up and get in bed.”
“I keep telling you this is where Charlotte gets her attitude from.” Bucky mutters as he takes off his shirt and settles beside you.
You laugh as Bucky pulls you closer. With a sigh you lay your head on Bucky’s chest.
“Is everything ok?” He asks.
“I guess. The funeral is tomorrow.”
“Do you want to go?”
“No. I’m done with everything that has to do with Lorraine. I have more important things to focus on.”
“Yeah?” Bucky looks down at you and smiles. “Like what?”
“Like marrying the love of my life.”
“Well that does sound like it’s super important.”
“It is.” You snuggle closer to Bucky. “I can’t wait to marry you.”
“I can’t wait either, Sugar.”
Ch. 39
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Okay. So. Good ol Daddy Dierkes texting you to see how you’re feeling because you’ve been nauseous for the last couple weeks and not getting much sleep. And this man’s says “think I put a baby in there?” And gets all hopeful??? Maybe?? Idk.. 🤦🏻♀️😅
AN: im a sucker for baby daddy Matt good lord.
divider by @/saradika
CW: breeding, p in v, Matt’s a yap, sadness in regard to a negative test, i think that’s it?
NSFW under the cut ◡̈
no but maybe it wasn’t super planned. maybe you were super stressed about potentially having a baby. Matty wanted that so badly with you, he wanted to see you big and round and carrying his baby. so when you text him while he’s at the studio with everyone, “can you stop by cvs and grab a pregnancy test?” he’s so giddy. “what? you think i put a baby in you?” and he’s trying so hard to be calm and collected because he knows you’re worried.
when he gets home and you walk out of the bathroom with a little frown and a “it’s negative.” his heart breaks, but it breaks even more watching your face fall.
“I feel like Rachel in the episode of friends where after Monica’s wedding they’re all in the bathroom and she’s crying about how can I miss something I never had. I’ve been so scared this whole time and then today all i’ve been thinking about is how nice it’d be to have a little us. To wake up at 2am because they woke up scared and to pick out their clothes and tell them all about how much their daddy loves them even when you’re away working and I just. I’m sad I guess.” Your voice is wavering, the sob coming at any moment.
All Matt knows is to pull you into him. “I know bubby, rarely ever works the first time. We can start really trying now, didn’t wanna bring it up too much before but if you’re ready now i’ll take you upstairs and we can start trying again.” He’d kiss your head, and you’d be okay.
It’s been a few months now, and you’re fucking like rabbits. Minimum 2-3 times a day. He can’t help it, he just loves the way your gummy walls feel around his shaft. No barrier between the two.
He was convinced this was heaven.
Matt insisted you have sex as often as you both could, the need to have you pregnant was greater than he thought it would be. And you agreed and nodded along like the pretty little wife you were. His pretty little wife.
“I know baby,” he’d coo down at you while his hands were pushing your legs further apart. Little beads of sweat along his hairline. He’s so thankful he put his hair in a bun before this. He’d already came inside you twice today but after seeing you with his friends baby it intensified his need.
“Gotta give you babies, honey bee.” His breath shaking, a moan falling from his lips feeling your cunt answer for you.
He was quick to pull out of you, listening to your whines. He smacked the inside of your thigh, “enough of that. Gotta be thorough, don’t we? Wanna see you walking around with my baby inside you.” He’d all but babble while he’s pushing your knees to your chest.
His mouth went dry when he started to push into your center. Your pussy just pulling him in, a silent promise you needed this just as bad as he did.
“Fuck.” His lips connect to the side of your neck. “Wanna be a daddy, and once we one? We’ll just have to have another.” His hand sneaking down to rub soft circles against your clit.
“Don’t worry bub,” he mumbled while thrusting deeper. “you’ll still be my best girl. Daddy’s favorite. Won’t ever let you forget it.”
“You ready for it?” He cooed, rubbing his nose against your cheek, “ready for my cum?”
You nodded, moaning a small “please Matty.”
“Shit! Gonna fill you up honey bee. Gonna put a baby in your pretty tummy. I know it, gonna stick this time. That what you want? Wanna walk around showing everyone what an amazing mommy you’re gonna be?”
“Uh huh, want it so bad, Matty.” You whined. Struggling to keep your legs where he wanted them, your whole body felt like jello. “Need your cum. Need you to feel me up. Please.” Lips pouting up at him.
With one, two thrusts, he slowed his hips, stilling himself so deep inside you he’s so sure he’s against your cervix. His hand rubbing gently on your cheek while he filled your tight hole.
“Think this is the one, bub.” He spoke while pressing a kiss to your forehead.
You stared at the timer on your phone, swearing this is the longest 3 minutes of your life.
A knock on the door pulled you away from thought. “Can I come in?”
You were quick to open the door, “you didn’t have to ask, Matty.”
The ding of the timer stilled both of you.
“Want me to check it?” Matt’s voice was soft. He moved towards the counter when he saw you nodded at him. Stopping in front of the flipped over test. Giving himself to the count of 3. He sighed and flipped it over. His eyes immediately watering.
Two little pink lines.
#ask breezy#matty boy#matt dierkes fic#matt dierkes x reader#matt dierkes smut#matt dierkes blurb#matt dierkes#matt dierkes headcannon#matt dierkes headcanon#matt dierkes fanfiction#matt dierkes fluff#dad omens#bad omens smut#bad omens fanfic#bad omens blurb#bad omens headcannon#bad omens headcanons#bad omens x reader#bad omens au
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Hey it's me again.... I was wondering if you could do wolverine with a male speedster reader but like reader isn't a typical bouncing off the walls speedster he's more low energy and it's just ironic that he's a speedster? Lol idk
AN: I hope you're ok with me just seeing the speedster as someone who is pretty nonchalant and sarcastic.
Characters: Logan Howlett x Male Speedster Reader
Warnings: None
Logan was never a fan of yours, as you tend to tease him very often and act all high and mighty.
whenever you would mock him for his animal-like senses Logan was more than ready to knock you around with your mockery
But you were always too quick for him to land a hit, resulting in more mockery from you.
You guys would pick with each other like an old married couple, You would call Logan a walking skeleton and he would call you a fatherless brat.
When heard was a low blow, you were shocked that he would even say that. You now know to keep Logan away from Rouge and their teenage comebacks.
When you guys start to become romantic, its when you both are on a mission. You could still remember when the professor had told you both that you were going together.
Your mouth was agape. "Him?!" You both yell. You turn your eyes to Logan who also looks at you. Irritation is clear between the two of you. "Professor, this has to be some sort of mistake. Why would you peer us together for this?" You question Charles, you cross your arms against your chest. "He will be nothing but trouble." You mutter under your breath. "I could say the same to you, bub," You roll your eyes at his words. "No, I need you both for this mission. Your speed is needed to get the information and Logan's senses to track the shipment." All in all, you guys were stuck together.
While you were on the mission, you two began to get close, telling each other things about one another.
Logan had even opened up a little about his childhood. The kinds of food his mom would cook
You had opened up to Logan about your birdwatching hobby. Where you would watch birds and try to catch them to see who is quicker.
Logan did look at you strangely when you told him on your hobbies but he couldn't really shame you. It all seems like healthy things cause if it wasn't for his healing factor he would have had alcoholic poisoning a long time ago.
Being on the mission at hand as well as you both having a tighter bond, You didn't make fun of him when he did use his senses.
The gun was aimed at Logan, you could feel your whole world stopping as you move without thinking. Zooming in time to push him out of the way, resulting in you being the victim of the bullet. A groan escapes your lips as you fall onto the floor. You couldn't see the immediate blood leaving Logan's face at the realization of what happened. He sees your body on the ground, his body beginning to warm up in anger. He then turns his attention to the person who shot you. His claws ripped the man into shreds.
Once you are done with the body, his attention is back on you on the ground. "Why would you do that?" He yelled at you, staring at the painful expression on your face. You couldn't help but crack a smile. "You have to be quicker than that," Logan growls in frustration. "I have healing factors!" You roll your eyes before you showcase the dried-up blood on your abdomen. "I do too. I am not just a fast runner. The whole thing is fast." Logan let out a breath he didn't know he was holding in. His tense shoulders drop at the realization that you will be ok. "Just... don't do that again. I don't know what I would do if I lost you." You were going to crack a joke but you could see the seriousness in his eyes. You nodded your head softly at the recognition of his words.
#wolverine x reader#wolverine x male reader#wolverine fic#wolverine ask#wolverine imagine#logan howlett#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x male reader
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could you do a fic where carlos has children and it just tonnes of fluff? thxxxx
A/N: AHH ty for my first request. I hope you like it xxx Also ignore the pictures idk why they are coming up in a weird order :(
Also Check out my poll for favorite kiddie from the fic
BANG. You jump out of bed hearing something smash out in the kitchen. Immediately you turn to the side, seeing Carlos fast asleep beside you. He must have gotten in late last night and snuck in without waking you. You told him he should stay in Singapore and celebrate the win with the team, but he wanted to be at home with you and the kids. You rush to put your slippers on and move towards to where you heard the loud noise from. Peeking into the kitchen you see your oldest daughter holding a broom while your boy sits on the kitchen stool watching Elena with a guilty face. You step into the kitchen, catching Elena’s attention.
“Oh no, sorry Mama, I didn’t mean to wake you.”
“That’s okay amor,” you reply moving to Mateo and kissing his cheek, “but what are you doing up? You should’ve woke me if you were hungry, I could’ve made you something.”
“We saw Papa’s car in the driveway and wanted to surprise him for winning,” Mateo says looking up at you with the same big brown doe eyes his Papa has. You can’t help but break out into a grin, these kids really were the best.
“Well we would’ve been able to surprise you too if Mateo didn’t go and smash the bowl on the ground,” your daughter spills. You giggle lightly, she’s always been the feisty one.
You now move towards her, grabbing the broom from her hand “that’s okay bebe, I can help you both now and we can make Papa a nice big breakfast.” You split the kitchen; with you cooking the eggs and sausage, Elena on fruit cutting duty, and Mateo mixing the pancake batter, the only thing you were sure he wouldn’t mess up. God was that boy clumsy. Within 20 minutes, all 3 of you had the kitchen island filled with a gourmet breakfast buffet.
“Cmon you know the drill,” the kids groan knowing their mom has to take a picture to document this. They would look back and appreciate it you thought.
“Perfect” you say snapping a picture of them standing behind the plated goodies. “Okay you two go brush your teeth, I’ll wake Noah and Luna and then we can surprise Papa.”
As your oldest two kids scurry to their rooms, you head in the direction of your younger boy. You sit down on the bed next to him, “Morning Noah, time to wake up baby”, you say, lightly running your hand through his beautiful dark hair. The same brown eyes flutter open and close as he cuddles into his stuffed Lightning Mcqueen. Ever since Charles gave him that, they’ve been inseparable.
“Nooo still tired Mama.”
“Cmon, me Elena and Mateo already made breakfast and there’s pancakes for you,” you try bribing him. No reply. You try again, “Papa’s back.”
PAPA’S BACK?” He jumps out of bed and ontop you.
“Shhh yes bubba but he’s sleeping,” you say rubbing his back, “So let’s go get you ready and then we can surprise him.” Happy with this plan, you get your third child into the bathroom and ready and bring him out to the kitchen so Elena can watch him. You sigh, only two more to wake up.
You head back to your bedroom, joining Carlos on his side of bed, you lean down and press a kiss to his cheek, “Good morning race winner.” He slowly opens his eyes giving you a lazy smile as he pulls you down into bed with him. 
“Morning carino, what are you doing up so early, come cuddle,” he says nuzzling his face into your neck, pressing light kisses along your shoulder. You lightly giggle while reminding him ‘Are you forgetting the house full of kids we have?”
You feel his smile grow against your shoulder, “I could never,” he jokes back, “I missed you guys so much.”
“We missed you more bub.”
You give yourself another 5 minutes to bask in his warmth while you can, just lying in his strong hold, feeling his hair tickle your ear. These are the moments you miss most every time he has to leave for a race weekend.
“Hmm, alright get up,” you peer over at the clock, “Luna’s gonna be up in 5 minutes, which gives you enough time to get ready, get her and meet me in the kitchen,” you say while pulling yourself out of bed. You drop another kiss to his cheek and as you walk out the door, you can’t help laugh while hearing Carlos groan and mutter “Yes ma’am.”
Back in the kitchen, Noah, Elena and Mateo all sit in the stools lining the island, waiting patiently for breakfast to be served. You’re surprised that they haven’t all rushed to Carlos in bed yet, they must really want to surprise him for the win.
“How long Mamaaaaaa, I’m hungryyyyyy,” Noah whines. There it is you think.
“Soon bubs, he’s just getting Lu.” Moving to the fridge, you grab Luna’s bottle, knowing she’ll be hungry the second she sees you and as you shut the fridge door, Carlos walks into the kitchen holding baby Luna.
“Surprise Papa!” Your kids yell running to Carlos engulfing him in a big family hug. You carefully grab Luna so he can give each of his babies a hug and kiss as they yell different congratulations his way.
He notices the breakfast feast behind them, “Did you guys make all this for me?”
“Si Papa,” says your eldest daughter with a proud grin.
Mirroring her smile, Carlos replies “Muchas gracias mi alma” and gives her another forehead kiss. You stand feeding Lu her bottle, just admiring the way Carlos helps each one plate their food and how the kids tell him everything they loved about the race.
“The DRS move to help uncle Lando was so good”
“You were going so fast”
“I felt bad for Uncle Cha”
“Was it hot”
“Is Uncle George okay”
“I knew you would win Papa”
That last one from Mateo has you tearing up (he’s always been his biggest fan), just seeing the beautiful family you’ve created and how happy the kids are. Carlos notices and comes your way, “Hermosa, why you getting all teary eyed on me hmm?” he says the same big brown doe eyes filled with concern.
“I’m just so proud of you and so happy that we could be celebrating together. Thank you for coming home,” you look up at him through your glossy eyes.
He wraps an arm around you, leans down and places a slow delicate kiss on your lips. Pulling back, he rests his forehead on yours and smiles, “Te amo carino, I’ll always come home to you.”
A/N: omg why did this turn out so adorable. I need Carlos in my life😭. Also please leave any suggestions/feedback on what you liked and didnt
#f1#f1 x reader#f1 fanfic#f1 imagine#carlos sainz#carlos sainz dad#ferrari#dad carlos#f1 drivers#f1 fiction
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Hi! I saw you did a drabble and and i wanted to ask if I could request Worst wolverine meeting the X-Men where their logan is gone? (Scogan if you want!)
let me start this off by saying i put just enough scogan that you know theyre gonna talk on the phone later laying on their bellies, giggling and twirling their hair while wade twirls logans hair too bc i couldnt help the poolverine......
anyway if the pacing feels off im sorry this ended up longer than it was meant to be but oh well!! thanks for the request, enjoy 💕
oh also idk what this timeline is.... i threw in what i wanted so its my own so if it doesnt maks sense then oops! cherik never divorced thank me later
"You sure you wanna do this, Peanut? You don't have to," Wade assured.
The pair stood outside of the mansion, in front of those large and daunting doors, where Wade was messing with Logans hair, or readjusting his coat, pretending to make Logan look more presentable but he seemed more worried than Logan looked. More like how he felt on the inside, jittery and scared to death. "Really, I mean. We can go home. Right now. We can-"
"Wade."
"I'll make you dinner?"
"Wade," Logan snapped. The merc whined and slouched his shoulders, and Logans voice softened. "Gotta do this. Even if I choose not to be an X-Man in the end, I can't avoid them for the rest of my life."
"You can, though?" Wade half questioned, half stated. "They don't even know you're back. Or, maybe they do, but it's not like they came to find you. You can probably fly that perfect little body of yours under their radar forever!"
Logan knew Wade was just anxious. Domestic life had been nothing short of bliss, and Wade didn't do good with change. Reintroducing himself to the X-Men could really mean a lot of things, and Wade just hoped it didn't mean taking his Logan, the one he kidnapped and domesticated, away from him. Logan chuckled softly.
"I ain't lookin' to become an X-Man again, bub, I don't think. I just... Wanna see them again."
"But wont that be hard?" Wade whispered, hugging onto Logans arm, who leaned forward and bumped foreheads with the mutate.
"Extremely." And then he knocked on the door.
Wade stood in front of him defensively, but Logan pushed him back, and when the door opened a familiar blue, gentle giant stood in the frame.
"I... Logan, oh dear. Is that you? Do my eyes decieve me?" Logan frowned, furrowed his eyebrows, and was already ready to leave. Until Deadpool cursed and stood in front of Hank, peeking over his shoulder and noting the full house which, if you've forgotten, dear reader, is usually completely empty whenever Wade had been here.
"What the actual fuck?! Does everyone just like, what, go on vacation when I'm around? Logans back and so now you all are, too? Fuck you guys."
Hank wheezed in alarm, having no idea who this guy was, if not because he wasn't in costume. Logan groaned.
"Nice t'see ya, Hank. This is Wade, you might know the name Deadpool though." Hanks face lit up.
"Ah! I understand. It makes sense, you two saved the world together- don't worry, Wolverine. No one else knows that you're back, not outside of the mansion, but the TVA thought it good to alert us of your presence." Logan nodded, and guessed he understood, but that made him think of Wades earlier statement.
"You guys knew? Didn't try to find me?" He was glad, right? He didn't want to be found yet, but it didn't make it hurt any less. Hank smiled warmly, noting the slight hurt in his tone.
"We didn't want to overwhelm you, is all, and didn't know if you would even want to see us. It is best for all to let the Wolverine come to them first, to take your time. Everyone will be so pleased to meet you again."
Meet you. Logan was constantly reminded that this wasn't his timeline, that these weren't his X-Men, and that he didn't belong here. He should be back in that bar, drinking his troubles away and paying for his sins by wallowing in guilt and drowning in booze while the memories screamed at him, reminded him, of what he'd done.
Wade hugged him from behind and whispered, "I can hear you thinking."
No. Right now, Logan should be back at Wades apartment, lounged in his chair Wade had brought in from who knows where, but it was just for him. He should be walking Mary Puppins, or watching (listening, in Altheas case) to an episode of Wheel of Fortune. Not standing here, in front of the mansion, but Hanks excited chattering that Logan hadn't actually been listening to warmed his heart, because maybe they did actually want to see him.
When Hank made a gesture for the two to follow, they did, Wade staying close behind, still seething over the fact that everyone just happened to be here now. Fuck!
Hank showed them around. It was exactly as Logan had remembered, with slight differences, as was expected. Some students ran by them, hardly paying them any mind, but others stopped to pause and gossip among themselves.
Isn't that the Wolverine?
Didn't he leave?
Why does he look different?
Logan felt sick, despite the students best efforts to stay quiet he could hear it all, and maybe Wade somehow sensed that because his seething stopped and now fingers were pressed to the small of Logans back. It helped.
Then, Logan could smell something- someone, familiar and welcome, but the smell brought back so much pain that Logans legs felt like they might start running on their own accord. A second smell was next to it, softer and more floral, feminine, and it wasn't a good smell either. Not right now, while Logan was still grieving, not when he wasn't so sure he could do this anymore.
But before he could turn to tell his companion that he was ready to leave, those smells suffocated him, he couldn't breath, and then a pretty face with soft, grimacing lips was in his line of sight. Logans stomach dropped, and he could hear the thundering of Scotts beating heart from where he stood.
Wade clued in quick enough- this must've been Scott, who Logan would talk so much about, his nightmares more often than not having him scream out Scotts name in anguish. There were other names, too, but it always came back to Scott. And Wade could see why!
The man was very pretty. The stick up his ass was certainly there, Wade could see it in his face and tense body, which he knew would make him so fun to tease. Wade hoped Logan and Scott rekindled some kind of old flame, because he was sure he could make the pretty boy snap and he really wanted to try.
Next to him was a soft redheaded girl, and Wade knew this was Jean. Logan had a lot of guilt around her, too, but he never talked much about it. He rarely talked about Scott either, but Wade hardly slept at night, and Logan liked to talk in his sleep.
"Who is this?" Scotts disciplined voice cut through the tense air, he took a few steps closer, his fists balled up tight and Logan reflexively drew out his claws. Jean forced them back in, then looked at Scott silently. There seemed to be some sort of understanding there when Scott relaxed his fists, and cautiously asked again, "Who are you?'
"You know who I am, Slim," Logan spoke slowly, a step towards Scott, who took a step back. "There's a lot of explainin' I need t'do, but I need you to know... It's so fuckin' good to see ya."
Scotts eyebrows shot up, but Logan zero'd in on the tear that rolled down his cheek. Cyclops didn't say anything, whatever conversation they needed to have needed to not be done here, but he gave a firm nod, and Logan nodded back. A silent understanding.
Jean rushed over and hugged him though, she must've read his thoughts, but Logan didn't mind. He never minded, not with Jean, and he hoped that was an understanding here too. He hugged her back, pet his hand down long, silky hair, then pulled back to eye her up. He smiled through the pain.
"Don'tchya look good, red. Always do." Jean blushed and giggled, swatting at Logans chest playfully but she couldn't stop the sniffles of overwhelming emotion.
"You're such a flirt, I see that hasn't changed. Whose your friend?" Jean hummed, eyes flicking to Wade, who grinned and did his most regal (and dramatic) bow, dipping as low as he could before flicking back up slowly. "Wade Wilson, my spicy little hot tamale, but you can call me daddy. Or, MJ, if you're nasty."
Wade cried out when Logan elbowed him hard.
The rest of the day was filled with "reunions", the meetings and introductions of new faces, and they'd even ran into this timelines Gambit. He was different than the one they had met in the void, taller and more lean but with something of a swimmers build. He was pretty- the other Gambit was, too, but this one reeked of charm. His eyes were a permenant black and red, and long hair hung down his back in a ponytail. Rogue was on his arm, smiling and chatting up Wade, who took a big interest in the two.
Remy gazed towards Logan, a lazy tilt of his head, as that god awful accent drawled while a hand tightened on his girls hip, "Remy like what he sees. Big, strong Wolverine? T'ink ah can get real used ta seein' dat mug 'round here." Wade looked a little jealous, or maybe just protective, but Remy smoothly added "make sure you bring dat friend ah yo's too whenever you visit, sight fo' sore eyes I reckon."
Gambit had Wade blushing like a school girl.
They'd eventually found Storm, who had hugged Logan tight and welcomed him to the mansion, and Kurt, who perched on Logans shoulder while Wade curiously prodded at his tail. Kurt flicked it's tip against his forehead and shouted at him to get away, but it was all playful as he poofed off of Logans shoulder then attached to Wades back.
Jubilee, Bobby, Kitty. They all got their hugs from Logan, made him promise to go out for food with them soon, and after what felt like a lifetime Logan and Wade were alone, standing in front of Xaviers office, and Logan swallowed hard.
"I... Don't think I'm ready," Logan whined, turning around, ready to walk out. Wade grabbed hold of his arms and squeezed, keeping the Wolverine in place.
"Be a good boy, Logan. You'll regret it if you leave now, I know that. Chat with him, Peanut, and then we can finally go home and watch our favorite golden girls re-runs." Logan nodded, turned back around and went to knock, but the door seemingly opened itself with a loud, ominous creak. Wade hid behind Logan like a small, frightened child, the Wolverine shook his head and slowly walked forward.
Logan couldn't believe his eyes.
There were two figures at Charles desk. One was the man himself, smiling wide with those crinkled crows feet, hands folded over the blanket in his lap.
The other was tall, with a long cape and an expression that could turn anyone to stone, but no helmet. Logan parted his lips to speak, Wade beat him to it.
"Oh get the FUCK out of here, no way. Magneto?! Oh I am so wet right now." He squealed, practically bouncing up and down in excitement. Logan didn't see the appeal, his poor metal bones always ached around Magneto. He didn't trust him.
"I was wondering when you'd join us," Charles exclaimed, rolling out from behind his desk where Magneto made sure to keep close behind. Wade ran up to him, groped at his arms, chest, then grabbed at his cape and wrapped it around himself while pressing up close against the mutant. He was going to get himself killed.
Except... Magneto didn't move. He didn't even look at Wade, letting the man climb all over him like a jungle gym, his eyes stayed locked on Charles with the occasional defensive look at Logan.
Alarm bells went off in Logans head, and they must have been loud because Charles shushed him, and Magneto held up a hand, ready to stop the Wolverine right in his tracks. Logan growled, and Xavier raised a brow, pressed two fingers to his temple.
"...Interesting. This Logan is far different than our own was, Erik. If we thought he was hard to tame, this ones more in touch with his animal side!"
This peeked Eriks interest, and Charles went silent, Magneto and the professor looking between each other. If Logan had to guess, they were having a conversation, kept only to themselves, perhaps to keep Logan from flying off the rail.
Eventually, Magneto said aloud, just to Charles, "Very well," hands clasped behind his back, eyeing Logan up with a new fire in his eyes.
The sudden attention from who was supposed to be their enemy made Logan ill. The room stayed silent, tense, until Wade finally spoke, letting out a breath he must have been holding to keep from interrupting.
"Holy shit, baby cakes. Yes. Yes, we're joining the X-Men, and I am so on Magnetos team." Erik didn't seem to like that idea, and was about to argue there was only the one team, until Wade planted a sloppy kiss on his cheek. Erik pushed him away.
Logan was really regretting coming here.
#worst wolverine#logan howlett#the wolverine#wade wilson#deadpool#scott summers#jean grey#cyclops#charles xavier#professor x#erik lehnsherr#magneto#x men#gambit#remy lebeau#rogue#slight cherik#slight scogan#poolverine#deadpool and wolverine
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Hii! Can you please do a drunk Remus talking all sorts of beautiful and explicit stuff to the reader. Like Remus is kinda never to very less talks about stuff like that straight-forward. Idk if you do smut, but if you do, could you continue with smut or smth like that?
adding smut didn't really feel right but i hope the rest is okay!!! thank you for requesting!🫶🏽
.
“You look so pretty.”
“Thank you, baby, now can you please—”
“No, like…you’re so fucking pretty, it hurts, love.”
“Remus—”
“You have the prettiest face to fuck too!”
Your cheeks burned at his admission, a soft sigh leaving your lips as you turned to looking at the boy currently grinning at you. His cheeks were flushed pinky and rosy, his eyes were hooded and there was a glow to him that you could only really get when you were out-of-your-face drunk. And yet, somehow, Remus Lupin still managed to look so pretty.
“You need to lower your voice,” you told him, one arm wrapped around his waist to guide him whilst the other scrambled to get your keys. “Our neighbours might hear you.”
Remus slotted in behind you once you reached your apartment door, his arms wrapping around your waist and his head dropping to nuzzle into the crook of your neck until his hair tickled your skin.
“They hear us just fine when I fuck you and you make those pretty noises f’me,” he murmured against your neck, his voice a little lower, a little gruffer to and it made your whole body burn.
You were used to Remus making dirty, debauched comments that made your whole body feel like it was on fire. But that was usually in the comfort and privacy of your own bedroom, where no one else would hear the filthy words he whispered to you.
You certainly weren’t used to hearing it in the middle of your apartment complex’s corridor, in the same way you weren’t used to hearing it blatantly in front of all your boyfriend’s friends when you picked him up from the pub twenty minutes earlier.
“Remus,” you warned, finally managing to get the key into the lock and pushing the door open. You quickly made your way inside, dragging your boyfriend in behind you before closing the door. But he was not letting go.
“You’re so fucking gorgeous, baby, it hurts,” the boy whined as he tugged you closer, pressing you against his chest like he was trying to make you a part of himself.
“Remus,” you looked up at him. “You’re drunk. We need to get you in bed.”
Much to your surprise, Remus rolled his eyes. “I don’t need to be drunk to know you’re a fucking stunner, love.”
Your face heated. “Well, no but—”
“Nuh uh, let me tell my girl how pretty she is,” Remus continued, lifting his large hands to cup your face and he smiled. “So, so pretty.”
Your hands rested on his waist, trying to press your lips together to hold back your laugh. “You done yet?”
Remus shook his head, his thumb grazing over your lips. “Never gonna be done telling you how beautiful you are.”
“You’re a smooth talker, Lupin,” you grumbled before eventually pulling out of his grasp to start guiding him towards your shared bedroom.
“Is it gonna get me where I want?” he asked, his eyebrows wiggling when he noticed where you were taking him, but you couldn’t help but snort.
“Not tonight, bub,” you grinned back at the boy, watching the way he frowned at your response.
“Tomorrow?” he asked hopefully.
“If you’re not wanting to bang your head against the wall, then yeah,” you promised him. “Tomorrow.”
.
#remus lupin#marauders#harry potter#hp#remus lupin x reader#remus lupin x you#remus lupin x y/n#remus lupin fic#remus lupin oneshot#marauders x reader#marauders x you#marauders x y/n#marauders fic#marauders oneshot#harry potter x reader#harry potter x you#harry potter x y/n#harry potter fic#harry potter oneshot#hp x reader#hp x you#hp x y/n#hp fic#hp one shot
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hi!! could i request a social media au where hughes!sister is a type of gracie abrams type singer and then she releases ‘dear john’ and i hate to say it but the non taylor’s version JUST for the fact that taylor’s voice is younger👍
but yeah if you can please do that it would be great but if you can’t that’s okay🫶🏻🫶🏻
btw your new quinn fic ATE😁😁
ofc babe!! and ty 🤭🤭🤭
this is not apart of my older sister!hughes au! this is all younger sister 🤍
do stream taylors version, but for this we are using the old one just for her young voice!!
hughes.yn
liked by jackhughes, trevorzegras and 387,736 others
hughes.yn hi everyone!! over the past few months, ive been radio silent to everyone, including my own family, and all for personal reasons that i felt i had to go through on my own. here right now, is the first time anyone has heard from me for awhile now. im here to announce that ive made another song! and its currently out now on all streaming platforms!
the song is called ‘dear john’ and i honestly put all of my raw emotions into it. i went through a lot these past months and singing, producing and overall making this song has helped me immensely.
i love you all. especially my brothers and my parents, all to the moon and back.
p.s im sorry this song isnt like my other ones. i took the even sadder root and dug to my core for this one.
comments
user OH MY GOD??
user her voice is HEAVENLY.
user LITERALLY
trevorzegras LIL HUGHES OH MY GOD.
trevorzegras im actually in shock cut it out
trevorzegras look at lil hughes go 🥹🥹
user no bc this song so perfectly shows how denial feels. how she immediately felt like whoever the boy was, was her soulmate, but ultimately wasn’t but she kept denying it. how shes finally accepting everything after realizing it wasn��t real.
user bro made it even MORE sad.
jackhughes come home please
jackhughes and tell me who tf did this shit
jackhughes i’ll literally bust his fucking face in ❤️
user protective jack 🔛🔝
user THIS IS SO SAD NOOOOOOO
user this is so lyrically genius for a nineteen year old, im actually in shock
gracieabrams gorgeous girl this is so good 🤍
user YOU ARE AN EXPERT AT SORRY AND KEEPING LINES BLURRY
lhughes_06 bub come home and tell us who did this
_quinnhughes ❤️❤️ proud of you kid
hughes.yn
liked by markestapa, edwards.73 and 276,287 others
hughes.yn you burnt me out, but he lit my flame right back up 🤍
comments
user WHO WHAT WHEN WHERE WHY
user it should be me… holding your hand 😞
user dramatic ass
jackhughes happy ur happy sissy 🤍
user why does she not reply to comments?
user is she obligated to or sumn? hop off her dick
lhughes_06 still so upset abt this
edwards.73 you lied and you know it
lhughes_06 i know 😞
markestapa ❤️
user MARk?
user shes happy… so im happy… 🥹😭
_quinnhughes great, now come to vancouver!
user he paints her skies blue and keeps them clear 🥹🥹
liked by author, markestapa and 726 others
elblue6 so proud of you sweet girl 🤍
user i love the entire hughes family.
user SHES MINE NOOOOOO
okay so idk how i feel abt it but i hope u like pookie
tags (perm!) @hockeyboysarehot (text or wtvr if u wanna be added babes!)
#hockey#jack hughes#nhl imagine#nhl#nhl hockey#new jersey#new jersey devils#quinn hughes#luke hughes#jack hughes x reader#luke hughes x reader#quinn hughes x reader#hughes sister#mark estapa#answered 🤍
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lee chan x reader
Idk what to title this
Dino x reader (ft. 95z)
Warnings: none, just loads of fluff
unedited so i apologize for any grammatical errors or whatever. i made this bc a sudden idea came to me🥹
---
It was around 1am when y/n felt herself sway in her seat.
Books, answersheets, pens, sticky notes, her laptop, and a variety of snacks to keep her awake but failed were scattered at desk. It was the last week of the first semester and she's trying to rush all of her academic backlogs.
Such is the life of a senior student leader with other commitments. Always the last to catch up with academic requirements and classes because of her duties.
She shook herself awake, forcing her hand to continue writing. Her eyes were drooping, but she persevered.
"Get it together, y/n. One last chapter THEN you can go to bed." she willed herself.
But she's been staying up for weeks now. Dark circles are more than evident under her eyes. She's lost weight as well, and she's been easily stressed nowadays.
So it was hard to battle sleep.
"Bub?" came a familiar voice. Normally, she'd get excited and awake whenever she hears the endearment, but tonight, she's a dead man.
Chan cups her cheeks gently, stilling her from swaying in her seat as she battled sleep. His eyes strayed to her paper, words not evident, but random squiggles she perhaps thought were answers.
"Baby, you're not even writing answers anymore." He chuckles lightly as he takes away the pen from her hand. Y/n tries to grab it back... weakly.
"No, I can make it... I'm almost thereeee." she whines, eyes half closed, trying to reach for her pen. Chan keeps one hand on her cheek while the other puts the pen away.
"Y/N Baby, it's been three weeks. You've been busy since the start of the month. Your body is probably hating you right now. Let me take care of you please?" Chan gently prods, almost whispering.
Y/n and Chan's friends have all been concerned about her state. She's NEVER had decent sleep since the start of the month, BARELY eats her meals and snacks on time, and RARELY goes out with them.
It worried them so much that even Chan excuses himself from practices earlier than the rest now so he could monitor y/n.
"But I need all these. I wanted all these." she counters.
"I know, bub, and I appreciate that and I'm so so proud of you... but what's the whole point of achieving all these if you're gonna lose yourself in the process, hmm?"
At this, y/n's eyes flutter open, now aware of where this is going.
She knows damn well that he's right. But she just can't help but panic sometimes, knowing that the rest of her classmates have already submitted theirs and she's probably the last one left, although she's been given a grace period.
"Let's go to bed, please? It's already Sunday. We can sleep in. You can get some rest, and I'll be with you since we won't have practice. We can do anything you want except these academics. Please, baby? Have time for yourself too?" Chan barters. He tries his best at making puppy eyes at y/n, hoping his aegyo would work on her like it does with his hyungs.
Y/n sighs as she leans her forehead on Chan's. He closes his eyes and nuzzles his nose gently on to hers, then giving it a small kiss later.
"Whatchu think, bub? Like my proposal?"
"Fine, you win. But only because I'm so so drained now. How do you do it, Channie? How do you get things done and not get guilty and tired at all?" she asks, eyes closed.
"Who told you I don't get tired and guilty? I do. I just don't show it that much." He admits.
"Why though?"
"Because I don't want to worry any of you guys."
Y/N looks at Chan, his eyes on hers, his hands finding their way back to her cheek.
"I've learned to handle myself earlier on because of the nature of my career. And the hyungs helped me a lot too. If you'll allow me, I can help you work that out as well. Because I love you and I am concerned and I want to take care of you the way you derserve to." he lovingly explains.
Y/n smiles sleepily, allowing her whole body to lose its tension. She drops forward to surrender to Chan, who giggles on the floor as he catches her.
"There's my baby girl." he coos, as he sits up, caressing her hair carefully. She snuggles closer to him.
"Oh my God, I've been craving this for a whole week. I really DO deserve this." she exclaims, making Chan laugh lovingly.
He adjusts to carry her towards their shared bedroom in y/n's apartment. Gently, he lays her down before climbing in after her. Y/n immediately attaches herself to him the minute he settles in.
Chan lets y/n lay her head on his chest. He showers her head with little kisses while he rubbed random shapes on her back, lulling her to sleep.
"We'll talk more in the morning bubs. Get some rest, hmm?" Chan says, grabbing a blanket to tuck them both in.
"Mmkay..." y/n sleepily agrees.
Chan was about to close his eyes when his phone rings. A call.
"Hello-?"
"WHERE'S THE UPDATE, CHILD? IT'S BEEN TEN MINUTES. ARE YOU HOME YET?" comes Seungcheol's prodding voice. Apparently, because of his worry for Y/N, Chan forgot to update his hyungs who were still probably hanging out together after practice.
"Sorry, hyung." Chan fumbles, as he sets the call on video, showing y/n on his chest, hoping it'd serve as an explanation.
"You got us worried here you know? How can we have ber when- Oh my God, am I seeing this correctly?" asks the older male.
Chan chuckles as he brings the phone back to his face.
"Yep. She almost fell from her seat when I came in. That's why I wasn't able to call. Sorry."
"No, it's okay. What's important is she's getting rest now goddamn... she's hard to take care of sometimes. Proud of you for being patient with her, Lee Chan." Seungcheol salutes from the other side.
"Did I hear right?" Comes Jeonghan's voice as he and Joshua comes into the picture. The three eldest are like real brothers to Chan and even y/n. They worry for them like real siblings would, that's why Chan can always go home earlier than the rest, so he can care for y/n too.
And when y/n is with them, they surround her protectively, along with the other members especially when they're out, since fans can get really pushy sometimes.
"Finally, she's getting sleep. I hope tomorrow we can go out too." Joshua sighs.
"Nope. I promised her we can sleep in and we'll do whatever we want- except those freaking acads."
"Then maybe we could go there instead? We'd bring snacks for her and whatever else she needs. Tell her in the morn-"
Joshua and the other boys stop when they all saw y/n stir in her sleep. Chan immediately caressed her hair to lull her back.
"Channie?" she blinks, trying to lift herself away from him. The boys on the screen signal him to end the call and just message instead but y/n sees them.
"Oh..." she starts as her eyes adjust to the screen.
"Heyyy, y/n! We were just checking in. Go back to sleep." Seungcheol smiles.
Still really tired and sleep drunk, y/n hums. Chan smiles as he helps her lie back down.
"We'll message tomorrow Chan. Get some sleep too. It's been a long day." Seungcheol orders, his leadership shining through the older brother figure that Chan sees in him.
Chan does a salute as the call ends. He puts the phone on dnd on the bed side table and snuggles lower to cuddle with y/n, already going deeper in her sleep.
---
The next morning, Chan wakes up first. Y/N is no longer on him, but is still asleep soundly next to his chest. Her arms wrapped around his middle while her legs tangled with his. He blinks as rays of light sneaks through the blinds, and smiles as his eyes start to focus on the sleeping beauty next to him.
Gently, he carefully carressed her face, using his finger to trace out her freckles that he loved.
Y/n hums and stirs, and Chan freezes for a second. Slowly like a cat basking in daylight, she stretches, hitting Chan's chin on the process.
This was enough to wake her up.
"Oh gosh, I'm so sorry Channie." she goes, caressing the spot she just hit.
Chan laughs it off as he catches her hands, kissing them both gently.
"It's good morning first before that, my love." He says, pulling her close and settling his lips to the top of her head. With a contented sigh, he inhales her scent like his morning coffee.
"Good morning, bub." she giggles. It was music to his ears.
"Good morning, bub. How was your sleep?" He asks, brushing her hair away from her face and tucking strays behind her ear.
"It was good. Really good. I think I dreamed of the oppas..."
Chan laughs loudly at this, his laugh tickling y/n's ears. God, how she loved his laugh.
"It wasn't a dream, my love. They called last night and you saw them." he explains, pinching her cheeks softly then booping her nose.
He was overflowing with love for her so early in the morning, and he couldn't stop himself. Especially now that y/n has finally gotten some rest that she so much deserved.
"Oh they did? So they're coming over?"
"Uh huh. Later in the afternoon."
Y/n reaches over to Chan's side, where her phone was also placed. He gently holds on to her waist as she lifted herself on top of him.
"It's 9am..." she announces.
"Wanna have breakfast? Or brunch?"
"Uhm... I still kinda wanna sleep more." she admits sheepishly as she sinks back to her place besides Chan.
"Then let's sleep more."
"How about the guys?" she worries. "We might oversleep. How are we gonna prepare?"
"Well, I could tell them to come for dinner instead so we could still have more time to sleep and prepare after. What do you think, bub?" he asks, pulling her close.
Y/n takes her time to answer, and stays silent. It fooled Chan into thinking she fell back to sleep.
He was about to snuggle closer and go back to sleep when suddenly, y/n jerks up, her head hitting the same spot on Chan's chin she already hit earlier.
"Owwwww" they both say in unison.
"I'm so so so sorry bubby." She frantically says, laughing. "I was going to try to kiss you!" she worries.
"Double that then." he teases her, tending to his aching chin.
Y/n caresses the spot, then kisses it. She then locks eyes with Chan.
"You can hit my chin one million times and I'd still be head over heels for you after." he whispers.
"I'll kiss all your pain away a million times more then." she whispers back.
"Why are you whispering?"
"Because you just did. Why ARE we whispering?" she giggles. Chan sighs.
Gently, he grabs her face in his hands, and softly lands a kiss to her forehead.
He stayed there for a bit, savoring the moment. Y/n closes her eyes and runs her hands on Chan's arms, enjoying the vulnerability and sweetness of the moment.
"I love you-" they say in unison again, after Chan breaks off. They laugh again.
This time, it was y/n's turn.
As they giggled at their antics, she pulled Chan by the collar of his shirt, and gently crashed her lips on his. It took him by surprise, but he quickly adjusts, burrying his hands into her hair and softly playing with them as he returned the kiss.
"God, I love you." He speaks first as they broke it off to catch their breaths. He peppers her face with little kisses, making her smile.
"I love you..." she replies, kissing the top of his nose in return. Chan pulls her back to his chest. His heartbeat drumming loudly, lulling her back to sleep after all the fluff.
"Go back to sleep, my love. We've got a lot of time." he tells her. Y/n nods, loving every moment of her rest. Her deadlines flying out of her thoughts.
---------------------
a/n: guyyyyys it's been so long since i last wrote something here😭 uni has been so stressful lately. Maybe that's why I wrote this in this light and theme. I badly need a Dino in my life too.
Anyways, I want to write more😭 someone give me prompts or something.
And as always, if you loved this as much as I loved writing it, please leave a comment or reblog so other people would see my works too🥹👉🏻👈🏻🤍
lot's of love,
aster🫡
#svt imagines#svt scenarios#seventeen#svt au#svt x reader#svt fanfic#svt fluff#svt oneshot#dino x reader#dino x you#dino x y/n#lee chan#lee chan svt
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Could you do something with TXT with a s/o that has emetophobia (fear of vomiting)? i struggle a lot with that phobia and it would mean a lot to see something like that :)
a/n: Hello!! thank you for requesting. I also have this fear and it’s the worst thing to have when you also have e/d. anywayssss please enjoy and I hope this can give you some comfort :)
yeonjun
he totally understands you and why you would be scared of this
he finds out about your fear when you get sick
you two had gone out to eat that night when when you came back home, you started to feel sick
you had eating something bad and were about to find out
you ran off to the bathroom and started to cry while throwing up
yeonjun heard your sniffles and insisted he go in with you
he frowns and almost cries watching how sad and scared you were
he wipes away your tears and helps you brush your teeth and clean up after, giving you the ultimate princess treatment
"im so sorry. i know it's scary. let's forget about it and focus on helping you recover."
soobin
you period cramps always made you nauseous so soobin finds out the first time you get your period while dating him.
you wake up with a stabbing paid in your stomach from the cramps.
you start waking soobin up when you feel the nausea coming on because you wrre feelign scared and didnt wanna go through it alone
he wakes up and you drag him with you to the bathroom
he immediately starts to understand why and comforts you.
a gentle hand on your back and one in your hair, ocassionaly moving the hand on your back to wipe stray tears from your cheeks
"oh baby, lets' fix these cramps so they dont make you sick again. poor baby."
beomgyu
He didn’t understand at first but it all hit him the first time he goes through this experience with you
You were both having a yummy dinner and having a few drinks
Once you both got home, you weren’t feeling really well
You’d eaten a little too much and you felt absolutely nauseous (idk about you guys but this happens when I eat out)
You explained to him that you feel nauseous but you’re scared
he does his best to go along with it and just comforts you, talking you through it.
“Bub, don’t be scared. You’re gonna be okay. I’m gonna make sure of that.”
taehyun
so so caring
if he sees you feeling sick and looking like you’re gonna throw up, he’s by your side in an instant
he walks with you to the bathroom to throw up and he’s with you the whole way through
He knows you’re scared so he holds back your hair and rubs your back
he talks you through the whole thing and once you’re done, he gives you a smile
“I’m sorry my love. I know it’s scary but you’re okay. I’m here. Let’s get you cleaned up alright?”
huening kai
you had a little get together at your apartment with kai, his bandmates, and some of your own friends
you were drinking and after a while. you had goen over your own limit
you started to feel sick and immediately looked for kai
you rushed to the kitchen and gave him and scared look
he rushed to you and you explained, with a slurred voice, you felt sick but scared to throw up
he nodded and led you slowly to the bathroom to make sure he could keep and eye on you
"it's okay. let it out, bubba. no more drinks for you tonight or you'll make yourself sick again."
#txt imagines#txt fluff#txt headcanons#txt x reader#txt reactions#soobin x reader#beomgyu x reader#huening kai x reader#taehyun x reader#yeonjun x reader
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thank you so much for replying!!! i’m the anon who was asking about is Lewis more strict or a bit of a pushover! honestly i have to say i adore Lewis with little danny (i just love how cute little danny is) or little george, i just think it’s so cute 😭😭😭 but tbh any of the littles are perfect- lewis just fits so well with all of them. i dunno lewis being more strict, maybe one of the littles has been pushing his buttons all day or something but idk, completly up to you!! hope your days going good 🫶🫶🫶
Lewis wonders briefly if it’s barbaric to put Daniel in a time out, a child so full of energy forced to sit out a punishment quietly should mean it’s effective but it doesn’t make him feel any better watching Daniel squirm in place.
He likes being the fun uncle, and Daniel’s generally such a good kid. A handful, sure. Mischievous but just the right amount for it to still be cute. The disciplinary aspect doesn’t come into play all too often, both parties usually keen to avoid it. But he doesn’t want to hand all of it off to Sebastian either. Feels it a bit too housewife-y to pull a “Just wait until your father gets home” or, Mama gets home, he supposes. Even if Sebastian handles it better, makes it look easier. Isn’t swayed by puppy dog eyes nor afraid to swat some bums.
His eyes land on the discarded toy cars, aids to the naughtiness that landed his boy in a time out in the first place. Daniel suddenly deciding that throwing the cars made them even faster than racing with them, not really calculating that plastic cars do not bounce off of TVs. They break them.
It’s not so much the material value, more the several warnings and redirection Lewis had offered that Daniel had ignored that were the deciding factor.
The timer going off pulls him from his thoughts and immediately Daniel’s spun around rubbing at his wet eyes. “All done?”
Lewis moves closer, gently pulls Daniel into his space. “Do you know why you were in a time out?”
The question pulls a whine from the younger, scrunching his face up. “Yes.”
“Can you tell me?”
More whining. “No.”
“Daniel,” Lewis sighs gently, finding Daniel’s wrist and pressing his thumb into the soft skin trying to ground him. “Can you tell me please? Or do you need to think some more?”
“No think,” Daniel rushes, pulling at his wrist. “I’m not allowed to throw, you told me a lot.”
“Right, cause you can hurt yourself, or Lew, or our things. If I tell you something I expect you to listen, okay?”
“Okay.” Daniel whines, successfully tugging his wrist out. “All done?” He questions again.
“You’ll be all done once you clean up the cars, alright? We can play something else.” Lewis says, the wrong thing apparently.
“No!” Daniel whines, one of his feet stomping down. “I wanted to play cars.”
“I know you did, but I’m saying no. We can try the cars again tomorrow. Do you want me to help you clean them up? We can do a puzzle after.”
They’re dangerously close to a tantrum, if the “Ungh!” that leaves Daniel’s body is anything to go of. Still, Daniel goes to collect the cars that are on the floor, scoops them up and then unceremoniously throws them into their container.
“Daniel Joseph!” Lewis scolds, a little exasperated. “We do not throw.”
Daniel just pouts, defiance clear on his face that wipes right off when Lewis finds his arm and starts marching them towards the stairs.
“No!” Daniel protests, unsuccessfully trying to stop them from going up them. “I don’t want to go to bed.”
Lewis ignores it, debates wrestling Daniel into a shower but decides against it, going straight for the bedroom instead.
Daniel’s defiance has melted away into just tears, a sob leaving him as Lewis sits him down onto the bed, flopping himself backwards as his socks are taken off. “Noooo.”
“I know, bub.” Lewis soothes, making quick work of changing Daniel into something more suitable for bed. The tears definitely don’t lessen, and Daniel’s face is red and blotchy when he’s finished.
Lewis isn’t a total prick, he’s not going to put Daniel to bed like this, gently pulls the boy up and tugs the wobbly Australian into his chest and into the rocking chair Sebastian likes to ridicule him for.
“You’re ok.” Lewis says softly, bringing his hand to the back of Daniel’s neck and scratching the hair there, allowing Daniel to hide into his chest.
They rock like that for a while, until Daniel’s breathing evens out a bit and his shoulders stop shaking.
“I’m sorry.” Daniel whispers, fingers curling into Lewis’ jumper. “I’m sorry. Don’t tell Mama.”
“Mama’s not gonna love you any less if you’ve had a bit of a hard day.” Lewis soothes, brushing at the tear streaks. “Just like I don’t love you any less.”
“Okay,” Daniel breathes, sniffling. “I don’t want to go to bed.”
There’s a soft smile that Lewis can’t suppress. “I know, poppet. I’m afraid that’s not up for debate though. I know a very tired boy when I see one, we’ll have plenty of time to play tomorrow.”
It earns him a pout, Lewis pokes it and presses a kiss to Daniel’s nose. “How about you go and pick out a book for us to read? If you’re quick, we might be able to read two.”
It’s enough of an incentive to have Daniel slide out of his lap and scurry over to the bookshelf, pulling out two books. “I was quick!”
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Yay more Goofs with Snoots! | DoD bit my Versions part 02 + OC!
(Burn scar warnings)
(Wanna see Part 1? Go to this link here)
Welp, part 2 is done now & I'm gonna tell you about it.
so from left to right we have: Starflight, Sunny, & a new goober named Sulfer!
Sulfer (The Skywing on the right) is a OC of mine who's apart of a AU these designs are apart of. If you wanna learn more about him, there's a link at the bottom here. VVV
Now here are the changes I made for the last 2 of the DoD:
Gave Starflight HUGE ears bcs I imagine Nightwings being based on bats more. (Also bcs he's blind now so now he need to use echo-location (idk how it's spelt sorry) which prob has been heightened due to him living in a frikin cave for so long-)
Sunny has some weird frill things near her neck, this is based on how some lizerds irl (I think) have some weird frills which puff up & make em bigger. However considering Sunny's is fluffy (bcs NiGhtWiNg DnA), it isn't as beneficial + she's a gremlin.
I kinda gave Sunny more colors (primarily on her belly which are faint but there) bcs teh sun does produce light & light produces colors which we can see. So just though that be neat.
Starflight has slightly bl00dshot eyes, mainly bcs you know what had happened between him & the volcano. (Which why he wears the blindfold now. (I know he isn't wearing it in here but JUST LET ME IMAGINE HIM GETTING HELP TO TAKE IT OFF FOR A BIT BCS SWEATY!)
Gave Sunny a 2 toned eye color bcs I weirdly imagine her mother being a misfit dragon (by that I mean the blue-grey eyes that my Sunny habs) also bcs blue fits well with any warm color imo.
Yes these designs are infact also in the same group as the designs I did for the 3 first DoD members. However these are NOT REDESIGNS! But AU designs bcs in my AU the tribes have more pizzazz & diversity. Also Sulfer is not in the Canon, he's a OC of mine apart of this AU I made which also changes bits of the lore.
Anyways enough rambling/yapping. Hope you enjoy this, or not. I'm necc is currently hurting rn & I just wanna end this so it's ending now.
Credits
Characters (the 2 dragons on the left) belong to Tui T. Sutherland but designed by me. The Red fella on the right belongs to me however.
Art is mine.
Program: IbisPaint
Bubs' TOS: Plz don't repost/steal, trace, or recolor my art WITHOUT MY PERMISSION! If you do, I'll take yur femur and pelvis.. SO, DON'T THINK ABOUT IT! (The PNS on my blog's pinned post clearly means "Please No Steal" plz follow that rule.) If you do post my art on anything like yur blog or somewhere else (With my permission) PLEASE CREDIT ME!
#neptuniadoesstuff#art#oc#WoF AU ig#au design#WoF#Wings of Fire#WoF OC#au oc#dragonets of destiny#Starflight (WoF)#Sunny (WoF)#Sulfer (Bub's OC)#CW: Burn Scars
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Hi again! I’ve recently read 2L and all I can say is that it’s so good🥲 normally I don’t read those types of fanfics bc I think they aren’t written well or not interesting but you definitely proved me wrong! I can’t wait for the next chapter! (I feel like it would most likely be my fav yoongi ff) but I hope you are doing well and I wanted to let you know that your such a good writer and your stories are very well written! (I’m super excited ab mutual help I can’t wait!) with that said stay healthy Mimi!
Hey bub!! You know what? I’m so surprised how many of readers come to me and tell me “this is not really my type of story but I love it” hahaha idk why it’s so mind blowing to me because I love these kinds of stories and I wish there were more of them here, so I could read them!! 😭 if anyone wants to write a zombie apocalypse au, I’m fully supporting you!!! 🥹
Thank you so much for the lovely compliments! I’m so happy you’re enjoying and loving my stories! 💝🫂
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hi, crazy kid here and i def got worse. tried to tell my parents indirectly and they understood, though i left out the horrible violence stuff. idk how to tell them that. i cant even concentrate and my inner crisis has been increasing. im going even more insane if thats possible.
hello bubs! okay first of all, let's not call you crazy kid, just cause you're struggling does not mean you can be branded as crazy. so from now on, every time you show up use "your yellow" and i'll know it's you <3
i feel like you really do need professional help for this. it's not easy to recover and heal from something like this on your own or just from the support of your loved ones. it seems you're struggling to talk to them about all these things going on in your head but trust me not talking about this and burying it down will only get worse.
i wish i could provide more help in any way i could. from all of your asks, i can make out that it's very serious. so please talk to your parents about it even if it's hard cause baby you really need it hmm?
try to calm down first, take deep breaths and put yourself in a good state of mind before you go to them. start with the small things like how your mind does not feel peaceful and then build up and tell them about, if not all at least a bit, of these violent thoughts so that they have an idea of how serious this is for you. talk to them calmly, explain slow and nice and try to make them understand what you need.
please don't resort to other grim or harmful ways okay? take it slow and steady, and no matter how hard it is, just ask for help hm? it is okay to feel certain ways and it's okay to ask for help when it gets too much.
with this i hope you take care of yourself and feel even a tad bit better soon enough. also keep updating me or i'll get worried :(
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AGH okay hii there (・・; idk if u remember me, but i was the anon from a while back who asked how you got into impact play and was! really nervous cuz i didn't know if it was my thing, but i wanted to broaden my horizons yk? your reply helped me feel a bit better (thank u btw<3) , but since then i've sorta realized that it's DEF not my thing and i wanted to ask,, do you ever feel bad about not wantin' the rough stuff, if that ever happens? like, do you ever fear that it'd make ur partner/playmate like you any less?
i guess i'm askin' cuz i've been having that problem, and idk what to do about all the pressure to like pain and degradation n stuff :( nd i really look up to you as well!
i know this is a MUCH bigger question than last time, and professional or not, i wouldn't expect ya to give me advice for this kinda thing, so again, i'm hopin' i'm not crossing any boundaries,,, so so sorry if i am, and obvs ignore this msg if that's the case! or maybe i can try sending it off anon later, so u can answer it privately, if that'd make u more comfy? either way, i rlly hope ur havin' a wonderful week, and i'm glad to see that your writing is getting more attention :)
hi bubs !! absolutely do remember you, how could i forget ?! :D v’never been physically sexual with anyone before, but can tell you v’absolutely felt less-than when someone else’s ideas weren’t somethin i was into. t’the point id jus go with it even f’i wasn’t a fan. . which is !! a big nono!! that being said, f’youre with someone who makes ythink you have to fulfill every fantasy they have— darker or not— they’re not the one. n that makes them a terrible, terrible person !! it’s neverever your fault, n it doesn’t n shouldn’t effect how much they love/care about you! you like what you like, n that’s great !! don’t let someone pressure you into doin somethin you don’t wanna do.
n that leads m’to mnext point ! there’s nothin wrong with not bein into pain or degradation or anythin . . . jus intense. cause they’re exactly that, yknow? like . . m’actually not into intense impact play !! i like gettin slapped/spanked but mnot a fan of kickin or punchin or stuff like that.. n the funny thing is, m’only into it if the person doin it is super soft n sweet right after ! anythin you do (with a partner or not!) does not have tbe somethin intense n crazy n rough tbe a good time. what matters s’if you feel good— if they feel good too! n being rough most definitely is not the only way to feel good !!
anywho, yshould definitely talk it through with your partner!! communication is everythin. it’s important t’have boundaries set n placed— respected too. any type of. . play time ! should be guilt free, n it’s much better when everyone’s on the same page!! sorry f’it sounds like mramblin. . there’s so much i wanna say but it’s kinda hard tput into words. . tldr: i do! but we shouldn’t, so it’s important to talk about it t’diminish that feelin of guilt/inferiority !! no need to apologize, sweetpea!! mglad i could help, even if it’s jus a lil bit! <333 n thank you !!!
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