#ideally w no actual moving parts underneath

[zvaigzdelasas]

Anyone have any idea what the name of this kinda PCB is?

[wandasfavv]

Shy

Wanda x Fem!Reader

Summary: Your girlfriend’s loving nature just makes you want to do anything that she asks.

Word Count: 4.7k

Warnings: 18+ Minors DNI. Soft!Mommy!WandaxFem!Reader, shy reader obvi, dom/sub, strap on(r receiving), oral to strap, light pet play(bunny ears), humiliation w/ praise, Wanda’s sosososo in love omg

Tag: @flkwh0re

You woke up to the feeling of nails softly clawing your scalp as a familiar and sweet floral scent filled your senses. With your eyes tiredly opening, you saw pale yet warm skin in front of you, littered with small and almost microscopic birthmarks you recognized all too well. Wanda’s bare chest was only millimeters away from your face, and despite the comfortable position, you moved your head a bit away as you wanted to see her face instead of just the sharp curve of her jaw looking upward.

Awake, she felt your movements under the sheets as she had her arms wrapped around your body. Wanda loosened up and allowed you to shift, tilting her head down to take a look at you as she hadn’t the entire time she was lost in thought rather than still sleeping. Straight away, she was met with your sleepy state, dopey eyes and puffy lips. Her nose scrunched up with a smile as she found it so adorable, and every morning she did. “Goodmorning, sweetheart.”

“Goodmorning… how long were you awake?” You questioned with rasp, looking at how pretty she was even just being in bed with tangled hair. You noticed the way her cheek bones were so perfectly structured and suited the rest of her features, wanting to just lean up and kiss every part of her. She of course felt the same way with you, just expressing it more as she actually did it.

“Not long, I just wanted to hold you for a little while,” she replied moving down a bit to reach your face and place lovable pecks around your mouth, all too quick for you reciprocate. Since her arm was snaked around your torso, her other one was underneath you as the hand connected was gently pawing at your soft hair. “We should stay in today, cook and maybe watch a movie together later,” she said, her husky voice a bit more prominent as it was early.

You nodded in agreement with her suggestion, finding it perfect and ideal as today was finally a free one for both of you. For the past week the you two were moderately busy. You knew how stressed she’s been with work, and you also wanted to make the most of the day. So to start it off, you initiated a heated kiss, wanting it to become and build up to more like most other mornings. Maybe her relieving herself by making you cu-

“Cmon, we should get out of bed,” Wanda said, quickly pulling away from the short lasting smack with an innocent smile. You made an obvious confused expression, but the woman ignored it as she released you from her embrace and got up from the sunken mattress. Looking up at her as she stood, you kept yourself in the same position since you were just planning on convincing her to go back under the blanket that you felt trapped under. Unfortunately for you, she only bent down to pull you up gently by the arm, saying “Let’s go take shower together, too.”

With that, your face lightened up as you began to consider that maybe she wanted to do something there instead. You quickly got up along with her help, and soon trailed behind. Once the two of you were in the bathroom, Wanda turned the shower faucet on, letting it become warmer before getting in. She let it run as she put out a hand under and felt for the right temperature. Luckily, it was quick and she allowed herself in first, getting of ahold of your hand to have you carefully step in. She was just so gentle with you, making sure you were always safe.

The moment the water made contact with your skin that was beginning to become chilly earlier, you suddenly forgot all about the cozy bed. Your body relaxed and in replacement of your thoughts, you went back the idea of pleasing Wanda. She looked at you as the water started to flatten your hair, but you also noticed how her eyes trailed down. Maybe it was now that she wanted to-

Before you knew it, she turned away and grabbed the bottle of shampoo, squirting some on her hand. Then she faced you again and immediately slathered the soap onto your head, though lightly. You again made a look as your eyebrows furrowed, but it soon went away as Wanda made it.

“Close your eyes for me,” she softly ordered, her fingers throughly and without much force, rubbing your scalp. You felt like melting under her despite the slight confusion of how she was being so… sweet. Sure she was like this all the time, but it felt a little different now. Especially since she hasn’t tried to do anything sexual with you like usual, only pampering and making you feel good in other ways.

She kept this up for a couple more minutes, and in honesty, you didn’t want it end. But of course it had to. Turning the shower head off, she grabbed a towel for you first, wrapping it around for you as you stood there letting her without little protest. Though, you did attempt to tell Wanda that you’re able to at least dry your hair yourself, but you were still met by her refusing and persuading you as she did all the work, telling you that she just wanted to take care of her sweet girl. And then this continued the rest day, you conflicted yet so warm and bubbly inside from how cared for you felt.

————————

By the time dinner arrived, Wanda kept herself busy in the kitchen, cooking one of your favorite dishes. And you, feeling unusually more needy, went through and stood by her. She noticed and felt a whoosh of air brush by her, indicating you were there, and so she turned her head away from the stove and towards you. She had a smile plastered on her face, gently glowing from the brightness of the light above her.

“Do you need any help..?” You asked meekly, your hands clasped together behind you as you stared over to the pot and then back to her. Wanda only shook her head, but found the way you were beginning to act endearing.

“Nope,” she started, setting aside the utensil she was using to stir before shifting her whole body in your direction. She stretched out her arms, grabbing you unexpectedly by your waist and picking you up high enough to place you on the marble counter. “Just sit pretty here for me, princess.”

Wanda stood between your legs and tilted her head up to peck your nose, lightly pinching your soft cheeks too, and making them heat up slightly. You listened and sat there until she was done, kicking your feet and swaying as you spoke and adorably ranted about random things that came to mind. And so, you didn’t notice the way Wanda looked at you. But how could you when you didn’t the entire morning till now.

Ever since she woke up, her mind was plagued with what she had in stored for today. Pushing you into this subby headspace. For what felt like so long, she planned on having you all to herself as she made sure that you’d be as agreeable as possible. Unbeknownst to you, Wanda had a lot more wants in the bedroom, and it was now that she wanted to test them out with you. But to do that, she needed you to be as needy as her, which at this point might be impossible.

Her hand came up to her neck to scratch as an itch came. With her set of eyes shifting between the task she was doing and you, all she had in her head was what’s been making her excited and filled with anticipation. The whole day so far, she had to hold herself back from indulging in anything. Every time you looked up at her with that cute little pleading face she wanted to break character and take you, but she needed to stay in check to ensure that you’d be fine for later. She knew how worn out you get after sex, so she couldn’t have you so early on, even if you were acting so appealing.

Wanda was barely able to focus on absolutely anything else other than the intrusive thoughts of corrupting your innocent sweet self. The way you were being now was already so perfect, needy yet a little air headed. She honestly could’ve went with it and had you do anything at that moment, but there was still something she wanted to do to really hit the nail. To make you as flustered as possible.

So once the two of you had an ordinary dinner, Wanda only gently placing her hand on your thigh under the table, she told you to go pick any movies of your liking while she insisted on cleaning. At first you wanted to refuse and help her, but you knew she’d just coax you into not doing it. And so you were there on the couch, clueless, waiting for her as you set up the tv. Skipping through the many selections of films, you found none of them interesting. But then again all you had in mind was Wanda.

Speaking of her, she came around the corner of couch, sitting beside you on the soft cushions. Her arm reached behind you on your lower back, pulling you in by the waist to snuggle up with her. By that action, your head was made to lean against your shoulder. But then her other hand came up to cup the side of your face that wasn’t pressed up, making you look up at her as she spoke with that sweet loving tone.

“Do you need mommy to do anything else for you, sweetie?”

You froze hearing that word, that name. You’ve never heard her say it in such a non sexual way, yet it made you just as nervous and immediately hot. Your face burned as you looked at her, only to see a normal expression as she stared back with a small curve of her pretty lips. “U-Um no, I’m fine…” you replied with a quiet mumble, turning back to the television screen that shined brightly in the dark atmosphere of the living room despite the sun still out.

Once you looked away, Wanda smirked to herself and pulled you slightly closer. She knew this would be your breaking point, where your head is the most fogged up and thoughtless. And she was right of course. Your entire body felt weird, like it couldn’t help but slightly tremble, some areas more than others. It was similar to chills, except heat replaced the coolness. Even the clothes you wore seemed to tighten around you, making it difficult to breathe the right way. You couldn’t take it anymore.

“Wanda…”

“Hm?” She hummed, answering you as she turned back again to look down. She saw how flushed you were, your eyes in a daze. You lightly tugged on her shirt, too, and it made her own stomach flutter.

“Can we… you know,” you tried hinting at what you wanted, too embarrassed to say it out loud. Yet Wanda insisted you should, teasing you in the process as she held a slight smile.

“I don’t think I know, honey. Just tell me.”

“Mm can we- um do something besides watch a movie?”

“Like what?” She continued to egg you on, knowing how nervous you get, and especially shy. But she loved to see it.

Your brows frowned once you sensed her teasing, making you pout with a slight puff in one cheek. It made Wanda’s smug face contort into a knowing grin as she snickered quietly. Then she talked for you.

“You want me to take care of you?

You nodded slowly at her question, your face still ablaze. Your thighs also began to squeeze together to ease the feeling between. “Please… mommy,” you mumbled under breath, looking away from her gaze after as you felt like shrinking. Wanda’s eyes widened hearing you, her heart beginning to race too. She really did have you now.

Peeling herself from you and standing up from the couch, she took ahold of your hand to get up and follow her as she led the way to the bedroom. Once you two were in, she gestured you to sit on the bed, also walking in the same direction but standing once you sat. Contemplating you, she asked a simple question.

“Can you do mommy one little favor?”

You looked up at her, curious as she asked somewhat hesitantly. Noticing the way she licked her lips, you figured it was something she’s been thinking about for some time. So you nodded, wanting to just do whatever. That way you could get what you wanted quicker.

She turned away from where you sat for a moment, towards the nightstand by her side of the bed. Pulling the top drawer open, her other hand reached in to grab an object before slowly taking it out. Then you saw what it was, bunny ears. Wanda went back to her original position, facing you now as she held the fuzzy accessory in front of you.

“Wear this for me, please?”

Wanda figured you’d be uncertain, maybe finding the idea ridiculous, but today was different. You were already so light headed and pliable, she knew you’d be more likely to agree now more than any other time. Ergo, she was met with your hand gently coming up to take the larger ears from her. Before you could though, she stopped you. “Let me put them on you.”

Your hand backed away and fell back down onto the bed, allowing her to place it on your head instead. Wanda spread the band of the ears open, letting it be wide enough to comfortably wrap around the top half. The ends were soft behind your real ears, and you actually enjoyed the feeling despite the lingering thoughts of being self conscious. But they were buried within your clouded mind, proving Wanda right. She was also enjoying the sight before her, yet that was maybe an understatement.

Her teeth bit on her lower lip as she carefully put them on you and not just from her preciseness but rather other reasons- because of how good you were for listening and the way you looked. For however long, shes been waiting to see you adorned as such. She was obsessed with the way it sat on top, one ear perked up while the other was slightly down. The light pink of the inner part contrasted with the brighter outer white, suiting and complementing the rest of your appearance. Wanda breathed out heavily, taking her hands off of you before looking away for a moment, and ordering you in tender manner, “Undress while Mommy puts on her strap, okay?”

The second she brought that up, you felt as if that one fake limp ear could’ve lifted in pure excitement. Again, you quickly listened to her and took off every single piece of fabric on you. You watched her mirror you, except strapping on a silicone toy to her center. The temperature of your face rose as you stared, examining how big the familiar piece was. You’ve taken it plenty of times to know how much damage it could do if Wanda wasn’t careful, but you had no worries at this moment, only thinking about her finally making you and herself feel good after a long day of deprivation.

Your eyes trailed her movements as she moved to sit down at the edge of the bed, then looking up at you before telling you to go and sit between her legs which were already spread apart. You took a few steps, going between her two limbs before bending down and kneeling. With your bottom pressed against the heels of your feet, you politely had your hands on your lap as you waited for her to tell you what to do. Although, you already had a sense of where this was going.

“Why don’t you get mommy’s cock ready? You can take your time,” she uttered softly, looking down and softly grasping your chin in which moved in her hold as you nodded again. She smiled at you, moving the strap to have the tip pressed against your lips. At that, you opened your mouth wide enough to take some of it in. However, you backed away nervously, letting it leave once it became too much. It was your first time doing this, sucking or even having her in your mouth. She noticed your hesitance, and only wheedled her way to make you more willing. “It’s ok, it’ll fit baby. You trust me right?”

You shyly hummed a yes, before you felt her make you open up again, this time her taking the lead and putting her hand behind your head as she slowly put her strap in your mouth. A loose strand of hair was out till she gently put it behind your ear. It was around a little more than two inches deep that you heard her praise.

“There you go, you’re taking it so well bunny.”

Your eyes widened, looking up at her. The new found pet name made a wave of arousal throughout your body, some of it slipping out of you and spreading its way around your inner thighs. You made a small whimper around her as she pushed your head down farther, and it had you shut your eyes as well. That was until you felt her lightly tap your face, making you open them again. “Keep looking up at me baby.”

You did as she said, with a doe-eyed appearance. Wanda bit lightly on her tongue, trying to find ways to control herself and not drive into your pretty mouth deeper than you can handle. You were just so so adorable, obeying her as you looked the way you did. Instead of pushing her hips up, she continued to bring your head down, making it hit the back of your throat as you gagged. Tears quickly pricked up. The intense eye contact was difficult to keep up despite the growing need, but you wanted to please the woman you loved.

Drool found its way around your lips, some of it dripping down to your chin as Wanda continued to make you choke on her. She didn’t think she could last another second of seeing you like this without actually applying more force with her body, so she pulled your head away by your hair from the back, making sure to not mess up the clean look of the bunny ears at least. She wiped the saliva off your face after the strap left your mouth with a small pop. Wanda then guided you to go on top of her, straddling her lap in a gradual manner.

“Mommy’s gonna make you feel really good, but I need you to do one more thing, okay?” she muttered, placing her hands underneath your thighs to pull up enough to have the top of her cock to press against your center. She felt the slickness, too, then leisurely lowering you. Most of it was in as you softly moaned, staring down at it disappearing within you. Wanda did the same before looking back up, placing her hands on your hips. You clenched your jaw, the feeling of her length inside you a bit larger than you remembered as she adjusted underneath you.

“Mommy, I-it’s big…”

“I know, I know… just go up and down. Can you do that? Bounce on mommy’s cock?” she spoke with a condescending tone, as if you really were a pet. Still, her words made you squeeze tighter around her, and it was enough to persuade you. You timidly mumbled a small “ok” and languidly lifted yourself up and then went back down, the tip pressing against your cervix already.

Wanda watched every movement you made, her eyes trailing from your center all the way up to the tip of the cutesy ears. As the sun was beginning to set, the soft yellow glow shined through the curtains of the window, making your skin have that certain golden hour look. She was in awe with how everything went accordingly. As you rode her strap, the singular drooped ear bounced along with you, flopping up and down. A part of you felt humiliated at the thought of Wanda seeing you like this, so you looked anywhere but her. She noticed it though.

“What, bunny? Are you shy?” her voice sounded like it dripped with honey. You let out a quiet whine of her name, the hold on her shoulders changing into your arms wrapped around her neck instead as you buried your face into the crook of it. Wanda lightly chuckled as she saw you getting more embarrassed, and rested her chin on you as she moved a bit closer to your ear. Her hand came up smoothly against your back, rubbing it to calm your nerves.

“Aw you are… you can’t even look me my sweet girl,” she said teasingly, and it only made you screw your eyes shut as you kept your face there. The combination of the smell of her perfume and her small gestures on your body made you dizzy. You were still riding her strap, though slower now, and Wanda let it happen as she waited for you to be a bit more docile.

After a minute or two passed, she moved the hand that was comfortingly on your back to the side of your face, leaning back to get you out of that position. Wanda made you look directly at her, and then you noticed how out of it she looked too. Once she was able to see you, her eyes became completely blown out, her pupils black with a thin ring of light green around them. Suddenly, you felt a harsher grip on your waist that lifted you up a bit, only to be met with Wandas hips roughly snapping upward. You winced and let out a small cry, your hands closing up in fists from the sharp pain. “M-Mommy slower, please…”

“Fuck, I’m sorry baby,” she huffed out, gulping down as she kept her gaze on you. With your eyebrows pulled together and your eyes glossed over from the continuous remarks she made about you, she couldn’t help but feel some sort of cute aggression take over her. She kept thrusting into your pussy, though less harder than the first thrust, as you let out noises on top of her. Her bottom lip quivered with need, uttering “you’re so cute, I can’t help it.”

As you began to ease up to the feeling and size, your mewls turned into pleasurable moans. Wanda took it as a sign to quicken her pace under you, and once she did, she also pulled you down onto her. The impact of it hit a spot you didn’t even know of. Her breathing sped up into pants, “I don’t think mommy can hold herself back anymore…”

Consequently, her strap aggressively fucking into your cunt made you dumbfounded. Wanda could’ve barely kept it together, and to take out some of her sexual frustration, she came forward and bit the lower part of your neck. The soft flesh becoming easily punctured, and causing you to whimper more. “Shhh, I know, it’s so hard to think when my cocks so deep inside you,” she pulled away from the now bruised spot, and made your head tilt down to allow her lips to crash into yours. The make out was rushed and hungry, moans spilling from both of you. A trail of spit followed suit as Wanda drew back. “But it’s ok, you don’t have to think right now. Just be a good dumb bunny for mommy.”

You shakily nodded, not even sure of what she meant. At this point you’ve gone fully non verbal, another sign to Wanda that she could just about do whatever she wanted with you. So compliant and easy, she was fucking obsessed with you. Her eyes continued to zero in on your expression and the white fuzzed up ears, which made her force herself into you rougher and deeper. She was even letting out her own soft groans similar to your noises.

The built up feeling within your burning tummy was starting to unravel as Wanda continuously hit your g-spot. You held tightly on her shoulders for stability, letting her just take out all of her frustrations on your sore but greedy pussy. She was getting a lot more brutal than what you’d expect. The room was filled with the sounds of squelching, skin coming into contact, and heavy breathing. Your fingers began to curl into her skin, making your nails painfully dig in and signaling her that were extremely close to cumming.

“Are you gonna make a mess on mommy’s lap? Yeah I bet you are...” she panted in your ear again with the prior higher pitched tone, making you tighten impossibly more around her cock. Still, she able to push through. The moment those words left her mouth, you shook your head yes vigorously. Wanda would usually make you beg and ask for permission, but she knew the state you were in right now. “Mhm, cum for me bunny.”

On command you shuddered above her, a wet mess leaving you and around her strap. The sensation you felt was almost unbearable, just so sensitive, yet amazing as your brain had nothing to think about. Your climax was all that you hoped for after such a long tedious day of teasing. It made you feel the fire at the pit of your stomach burn at its peak. Immediately, you fell limp on top as your legs shakily gave up from its support. But Wanda kept you up, enough for her to still bury herself into you and letting you ride out your orgasm.

Once it fully passed and started to overstimulate, you whined and made her stop. Thankfully she did, even if a part of her wanted to do more to your poor body. Her arms wrapped around your middle and made your chest, which was rising in and out rapidly, press against the side of her face. She comfortingly held you like this for a moment, making sure you caught your breath as she listened to sound of your heartbeat. Her head then moved back up to look at you, “You’re so good, sweetie. Mommy’s perfect girl.” She spoke with tenderness, making sure you continued to stay in that floaty headspace even after, especially after.

You couldn’t help but lean down and place a chaste kiss to her lips unexpectedly. But Wanda sensed your clinginess per usual. As you detached, her mouth formed into a smile, the one you loved so much as the lines around the sides became more noticeable.

“I love you so much, you have no idea,” she murmured. Even as the sun began to become out of sight, you knew her cheeks were red. She placed more feather like kisses around your neck and up your jaw. She didn’t think you’d respond back, so she kept on the aftercare and words of praise. “My shy little bunny, so perfect.”

You blushed profusely as you felt a flutter in your lower stomach, the name making you more giddy despite the many uses of it already. You still needed more time to get used to it- that is if you ever will.

“I love you too mommy…”

Your meek voice caught her off guard, but it turned purely sweet as her grin grew larger. She held your face again, kissing you another time, this time longer. Look at you still trying so hard to please her.

It was obvious that Wanda would’ve done anything for you. And it was the same with you, of course. So likely, next time she’ll have you doing another thing for her the same way as today. Maybe an additional fluffy tail that she already had in mind.

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

oooof ask for hozier recs and i shall deliver!! i've been obsessed with him i fear...

my personal rn is probably Too Sweet, but my most played song of 2023 was All Things End. beautifully moving (as in i was sobbing for the entire song the first time i heard it), i just adore the way he describes love.

more personal favorites: Through Me (this song is insane actually!! can't describe it with words.), From Eden (one of the best love songs i've ever heard), Angel of Small Death (soo insanely addictive, his voice in this one ugh) and Movement (soft and beautiful and the very first song of his that I heard). The Eat Your Young EP is a wonder in itself but tbh so is everything else,,,,

now for some specifically sugu coded songs: Through Me and All Things End, Who We Are from his last album (the lyrics... my days the lyrics are so beautiful), Blood Upon the Snow!! (written for God of War Ragnarok, it's so good ??), Almost (Sweet Music) (be still my foolish heart, don't ruin this on me ✊😔)

but like i said, every time i hear a Hozier song it's sugu coded in my head... the lyrics always make sense to me. the way they're always so poetically romantic, yet in many of them there's a lingering pain underneath, wether it's because the love is already gone or because the love is simply way too much for just one heart to handle... i'm not okay.

fun fact, i once fell asleep listening to him and dreamt that it was suguru singing... and you know what it makes so much sense, i'll take it.

this got kinda long i'm sorry :(( anyways i hope you have a great day/night

(perhaps i shall write a lil' sugu thing inspired by too sweet)

NOE !!!! finally getting to this……. thank you so much for the recs!!! 🥺🥺 i appreciate it sm…… putting some of my thoughts under the cut hehe

I LOVE TOO SWEET . SO MUCH. it was the first song of his i listened to and wowwwwwww does it go hard….. so catchy and good and just. augh. IT’S SO SUGUCODED TO ME…. esp depression era sugu….. the lyrics are just gorgeous and so him. “but while in this world // i think i’ll take my whiskey neat // my coffee black and my bed at three // you’re too sweet for me”…. :’3 my baby

FROM EDEN IS SUCH A BOP . i loveee the instrumental ……. AND THE LYRICS . ”honey you’re familiar like my mirror years ago // idealism sits in prison, chivalry fell on its sword” <- BANGERRRR I CRIED . i am thinking many knight sugu thoughts ngl…. “i slithered here from eden just to sit outside your door” THINKING MORE SUGU THOUGHTS but specifically cult leader sugu …. aughhh 😔😔

angel of small death & the codeine scene……… tell me why this one made me so insane . such a tasty title and instrumental and lyrics i’m just????? i feel this way abt all of these but this one is so sugucoded too 😭 “freshly disowned in some frozen devotion”…. that’s our guy <333

EAT YOUR YOUNG IS SO CRAZY GOOD OUGHH….. i love love loveeee the “seven new ways that you can eat your young” part 😵‍💫😵‍💫 soso addicting. the lyrics are great and his voice is just soooo……. i don’t even know . i’m a little obsessed . “it’s quicker and easier to eat your young”…….. hhhhhhhhHH very sugucoded too ofc . any mention of eating is automatically a sugu reference 🙏

movement is super catchy !!!!! kinda relaxing too…… very soft. i rlly like the chorus :33 gives me waltz vibes…… kinda haunting…….

all things end + through me are soso pretty!!!! goshhhh his voice is nice……. i love the final part of all things end!!! w the synchronized clapping!!!!! so good …. and the lyrics for through me are so tasty . “with each grave, i think of loss // and i can only think of you // and i couldn’t measure it”…….. nomnom

ohhhhhh who we are is so beautiful :(((( his voice sounds so tender ….. i def get the sugu vibes here too!!!!! the feeling of something important slipping through your fingers …. “this phantom life, it sharpens like an image // but it sharpens like a knife” 😵‍💫😵‍💫 vert tasty . very sugu.

I’VE HEARD BLOOD UPON THE SNOW BEFORE BC OF RAGNAROK….. godddd it’s so. chillingly beautiful. the instrumental scratches my brain just right …… and the LYRICS . “too all things housed in her silence // nature offers a violence”….. “the parent forced to eat its young before i grows”…… it’s very . Raw . i like it a lot :3

AND FINALLY….. almost (sweet music). SO GOOD. i adore this instrumental and vibe so much + the lyrics are obv super pretty….. “i laugh like me again — she laughs like you”…… i love how light this one sounds in comparison to some of the other ones!!! a summer song for sure… a lil bittersweet….. and the chorus is literally SO addicting i can’t stand it……. BUT YES THIS ONE IS SO VERY SUGU. NOE. IM TEARING UP 😭😭 “be still my foolish heart // don’t ruin this on me”…. the idea of sugu thinking this…. maybe an au where he slowly recovers after his almost-defection….. or a childhood friends to lovers au…… i dunno. but my brain is spinning. i love him :(((((((

PHEWWW THOSE WERE GOOD . i love his voice sm….. i think my favs out of these options are too sweet, almost (sweet song), from eden and maybeeee angel of sweet death/eat your young…. but they were all super catchy :’3 thank you sm for these recs noe… sugu has invaded my brain

[saintsandsorcery2]

Saints and sorcery - Chapter 2

Pairing: Gale x f!Tav

Ao3 <3

Cyder smiled as she took note of the little changes around the camp, trying to forget what those changes meant. This was no longer a short endeavour.

Lae’zel sharpened her sword, Shadowheart threw her a dirty look or two, Astarion seemed amused by the entire spectacle. The newcomer – Will – didn’t mingle with the rest of them yet, Gale tried to assemble a meal from what they had found, helpful as always. It was like a well established community.

She gave the wizard another glance. His hair was pinned back in a bun, the silvery grey streaks illuminated by the evening light of the setting sun. Cyder watched him work, even cooking – a task she had always seen as mundane – seemed to come with precision for him. The way his hands hovered over the selection of herbs he’d collected along the way, fingers moving almost the way they did when he was composing the weave.

A small frown appeared between her brows. Maybe she hadn’t noticed it before, but now she certainly did. There was the slightest tremor in his movements – however graceful they were. It hadn’t been there when they were talking to Zevlor or Ethel. The Marshes probably weren’t the ideal place to set up camp, but they had been here for the better part of the day and he hadn’t seemed upset by it in any way.

Then, again, why was she so damn worried? Tomorrow they would talk to this Ethel and if all went well she would rid herself of the parasite. And she probably wouldn’t see Gale again. No, not probably. Definitely.

Gods, where would she even go once all of this was over. There was only one place she could call home, and she had no desire to return to it.

She undid the final buckle holding her armor in place. Cyder knelt as she gathered up the Platemail parts and readjusted the clothes she was wearing underneath, glancing up now and then to catch another glimpse of Gale.

Don’t be a fool, she reminded herself as she strode across the camp, … but a little conversation never hurt anybody.

„Do you need help with that?“ she asked, placing her neatly folded and stacked armor on the ground.

„Oh,“ he looked up at her wide-eyed before giving her a radiant smile. „I can manage on my own, but if you want to…“ he gestured vaguely to towards a few tomatoes. „But you really don’t need to. It can’t be easy leading a group like ours to make… any good decision, really. If you want to rest that’s perfectly fine.“

„Something to do is all I really need right now.“ she smiled back at him, picking up the tomatoes and began slicing them. „If I rest for too long who knows, I might just start thinking.“

„Don’t you do plenty of that already?“ he asked, picking up some herb or another, none of which Cyder could identify. „You do seem like the kind of person who gets lost in her thoughts all to easily.“

„Well, yes. That’s part of the problem.“

„Are you sure about that?“ He took up whichever herbs he’d just picked out and discarded them into the pot. He became quiet for a moment, something Cyder wasn’t sure he’d ever been before. „You are fascinating.“

She sought to deny it out of habit and saying thank you simply felt like too much, so she settled for the truth. „So are you.“

They let the silence wash the words away.

Cider winced at the sudden discomfort that seemed to surround them. She pointed at the unevenly cut tomatoes. „Is is okay like this?“

„Hm?“ he looked first at her, as if torn from some deep thought, then at her work. „Perfectly fine.“

She nodded, added them to the questionable stew that slowly but surely began to smell like something she might actually like. She sighed, taking in the aroma. „It’s funny, you know. What you make from mere scraps is better than anything I ever cooked with fresh ingredients. I’m a terrible cook, if my husband is to be believed-“ she halted.

„You‘re married?“ He asked, his voice taking on a slightly questioning tone.

She cursed herself silently before correcting him. „Was married, not that I had much say in the matter. I will take being abducted and tadpoled as a convenient point in time to separate from him.“ she grimaced. „Strange how it took all of that for me to finally dare to do it.“

Another wave of silence settled over them before Gale Spoke again. „If you ask me, you’re an excellent cook.“

[highpressurephotography]

JULY 17-19, 2014 – FORBIDDEN W. RIDGE

After a long backpack excursion into the Pasayten Wilderness, I was eager to haul heavy loads up to an alpine climb and feel the excitement of exposure beneath my feet. After much weather checking and beta reading, we decided that the short drive up to the Boston basin trailhead and an attempt on Forbidden was our best bet. The weather forecast for the 17th and 18th were superb, with a system coming in on the 19th. Our plan was to hike into camp on the 17th, climb on the 18th, and then simply walk out, likely in light rain, on the 19th. If that was our plan, we did stick to it, though… it’s probably assumed that we meant to actually get back to camp and sleep before walking out…

The decision to climb Forbidden was undertaken seriously once we read trip reports at the ranger station that the snow in the approach gully was still in. This key part of the climb is often the crux. Not necessarily for its difficulty, but for the exposure to rockfall and the fewer options you have to do anything else. There are bypass routes that have you scrambling up on a nearby rock buttress, but if the snow in the gully is in, it should be a simple matter to walk up on top, with much of the loose junky rock locked into the snow below your feet.

I may have misspoken when I said the approach gully is the crux of the route. Taking overnight gear up the boston basin trail gives most any technical part of the climb a run for its money. Large signs greet you at the beginning of the trail. One clearly states that if you aren’t in for the type of trail that is coming, you should drive further up the road to the Cascade Pass trailhead, and its plethora of switchbacks. The boston basin trail is a wilderness climber’s trail that is not maintained, but just tromped down by the traffic. Stream crossings are wild and thought provoking. I see the point of maintaining the ideals of wilderness in this special area. I also wouldn’t have turned down a well constructed (or poorly constructed) bridge across some of the sketchier stream crossings.

After the work of gaining the basin and the seemingly class 3 scrambling up trail, the amazing views of the iconic peaks of the Cascade Pass area are well worth it. From Torment to Forbidden, Boston to Sahale, and always Johannesburg behind you throwing ice down its flanks, the scenery does not let up. Even though the approach gully was reported as “just barely” in, the upper boston basin camp was not melted out, so almost all the climbers had opted to stay at the lower camp to enjoy the flat dry tent spots and easy access to stream water next to camp. After trudging up the trail, we didn’t disagree.

From camp we could see the beginnings of the gully and even more importantly heard stories from folks who had gone up and down the gully in the preceding days. Most of these stories were epics. 20+ hour pushes up the east ridge and back down the west. Bailing off the classic Torment-Forbidden traverse. We listened to the stories, mentally set our alarm clock for earlier and earlier, and then quickly filled up our water reserves and made haste to cook up some dinner. After thinking through the next day we decided a 3AM wakeup call was in order. I snapped as many pictures of the beautiful scenery as I could, set up a timelapse and finally crashed for a few hours of rest before the climb the next day.

Since we had our food situation dialed from the backpacking trip our breakfast went super quick – pour water into our granola and dehydrated milk, chow down, throw down as many bars as possible, and then gear up for the hike. As the approach image shows above, there is quite a bit of walking up from the lower camp along moraine features before traversing under snow and then finally gaining the gully’s snow finger before climbing up to the base of the route. As we started to move, early morning light was already gracing the clouds above Torment, and as we made the traverse over underneath the snow, the basin was already seemingly awash in early morning light.

Roping up at the bottom of the gully afforded the ability to quickly throw in a picket and a hasty belay wherever needed. The conditions proved straightforward, however, and we continued up simul-climbing until we found a large crack in the snow. It was almost possible to jump across, but would have been risky with a 10-15′ sliding awkward fall into the crack if you didn’t make it. The team behind us managed to stretch across and place a picket before yarding themselves over – I wish that thought had occurred to me.

After thinking about our options and taking a look around, I eventually climbed down into the crack, got down to the rocks below and did some fun and slightly terrifying mixed climbing up along the wall next to the snow gully. Rap stations of dubious quality were all around, but I climbed further up and gained a small ledge where I eventually built a rock anchor and brought Nicole up. From there we walked up the rock ledge further, passing by another smaller crack in the snow, before again regaining the snow at a small step across. Now we just had to walk the remaining several hundred feet up to the base of the route.

Once we reached the top of the gully, we made a critical error in forcing the line straight up to where we could see the notch and the beginning of the formal route up the west ridge. The beta described easier class 4 ramps, but my eyes only saw the doable (though slower!) class 5 terrain above. After 45m of loose and somewhat sketchy mid class 5 climbing, a short 5.8ish headwall finished off the first pitch of our climb, where I set up a belay in sight of the obvious class 4 ramps that walked right around the technical terrain I had just picked my way up. With plenty of gear placed on the route, however, I was forced to have Nicole follow my poor path, retrieve the gear, and continue on. Time was already not in our favor, but the day was still early, and we pushed on.

We tried a stint of simul-climbing along the ridge, hoping to make up time, but a few step across moves and the extreme exposure had us quickly switching back to belayed climbing. Immediately the route succeeded in showcasing its classic status, as pitch after pitch of amazing moderate climbing unrolled in front of us with amazing views off to some of the jewels of the north cascades and beyond.The first false summit comes quickly, and as we approached it a pair of climbing rangers were climbing down after having climbed up the north ridge. We chatted as we brought up our respective followers, and then pushed on.

We lost count of the number of pitches and half pitches we added together. At one point we were passed by the only other group on the mountain – a duo of guys who were day tripping and, until they passed us, quickly and efficiently simul-climbing. We hit one of the mid-5th cruxes shortly after they took the lead, and as they switched to belayed climbing, we waited behind for our chance to forge ahead. Not that we weren’t already behind our schedule already, but the constant 20minute delay at each belay station certainly didn’t help.

We got to within sight of the west summit as the weather started to turn. A slight but steady wind picked up, and the friendly clouds that had danced around the nearby peaks suddenly thickened and the cloud ceiling fell precipitously. Being so close, we pushed on and tagged the west summit, eyeing the east summit so close by, but far too far away time-wise. A careful downclimb or rappel followed by one more pitch would have been required to top out on the east summit. We took in what was left of the views, and started rigging ourselves up for the descent. We were again caught up behind the crew of two who were doing 30m rappels along the ridge. With our double 50s, we shot down a little lower at times and traversed back to the ridge, always just a step behind. While we were moving efficiently, we had already dedicated ourselves to a long night – it was far too late to still be as high up on the rock pitches as we were.

Gorgeous views, but we didn't really want to be still on rock at this moment...

The lack of pictures should tell some of the tale – I tend to keep my camera out in all kinds of conditions. It has gotten rimed over on the south sister summit, drenched in moisture in Glacier National Park, and laid out in dusty desert scenes throughout Joshua Tree and other southern California vistas. With the fading light, I finally stashed it in my backpack and concentrated all my efforts on the descent. It was full on dark when we found our way back to the notch in the ridge. We now needed to find our way down technical rock to the top of the gully proper, down the snow, across the crack in the snow, and then back to camp. The descent on the ridge was slow, but straightforward for the most part. Nicole led a few down-climbing pitches, and was a champ at route finding in reverse to keep us from veering too far off the ridgeline in the wrong places. We came upon the notch in the ridge, and despite the flat bivy spots there were not tempted to stop yet since we hadn’t even reached our cache of boots and gear, which we had left at the top of the snow gully. Had we scrambled up to the notch via the class 4 ramps, it might have been tempting to hunker down there for the evening.

We searched around in the dark misty conditions for rappel anchors or a feasible scramble down the ramps. We finally picked our way down, slowly moving down slick wet rock. After finding a rappel station, I shot down the ropes and landed in snow. The headlamps above and to my right gave away the position of the next rap station where team ahead was still to send their second down. As we put our boots back on, added layers and debated bivying on the last flatish ground we would have for hours, the guys finished their rap and pulled their ropes. We were tempted to take them up on their offer to use their rap lines, but the angle of the ropes actually left their lines well over our heads, and flicking didn’t produce enough sag for the lines to come back to within reach. After deciding to continue down, I climbed up a sketchy 15′ up to the rap station which was presumably set when there was much more snow to facilitate access.

Incredibly our first 50m rap brought us all the way down across the top crack, and just a dozen feet above the major crack in the gully – talk about making it feel small! I rapped down and set a double picket anchor, then yelled down for Nicole to follow. Once she was there it was game plan time for the last technical hurdle before walking out – the larger crack below us. The other team had lowered the first person across, since from the upper portion you could just about reach across with a foot to the top of the lower snowbank. With some rope tension it was then possible to stand up and lean back to get across the gap. Their second then placed a picket directly uphill of the crack, clipped it, and got the same treatment. He attempted to reach back across to take the picket back, but it was too far uphill. We eventually did exactly the same maneuver. But first we needed to pull our ropes from the first rappel. This went smoothly enough at first, but once the first knot came down we paused and untied it and set up the next rappel which we only needed 25m for. Once we went back to pulling the upper rope it got stuck fairly quickly – presumably wedged up in-between some rock and snow up high. Nicole put me on belay with the other rope and I started to climb up to attempt to free the blue rope. After getting 20′ above, I slipped out in the snow and slid for a few feet before self arresting. The gully is steep enough that Jim Nelson describes self arrest as not being an option. I recalled this sentence in the route description as I sank my axe into the snow and put all my weight on it. I wasn’t really in the mood to throw a factor 2 (minus whatever friction I could provide) onto the picket anchor. After thinking through our options, the time, fatigue and everything else, we eventually decided to leave the blue rope. I felt sick over this – it’s expensive. It’s junk we’ve left up in the mountains. But at the time it seemed the safer thing to do.

Once I got back down, I lowered Nicole through and she yelled back up that it was possible when she was on the other side. I carefully down climbed to the bottom picket, clipped it, and used the tension to help get across. I was already pretty out of it – looking back I wish I had thought to just make a quick snow bollard and taken the gear back. I’m pretty convinced that the snow conditions would have been just about perfect for it. Regardless, the plan went off without a hitch, and there we were below the crack with continuous but steep snow below us, then a walk back to camp. For a few 50m rope lengths I would lower Nicole through the steep snow, then she would give me a hasty belay from below as I carefully down climbed. At this point, probably sometime early in the morning, we had decided to keep moving, but to go slowly to avoid any poor decisions due to the fatigue.

The next landmark we had were a small pile of rocks where we had left our poles on the way up. The visibility all night long was about 10 feet. Headlamps allowed you to see around you, but if turned off, you could sense larger ridgelines much further away, but could make out no detail. The obvious pile of rocks on the way up didn’t feel so obvious any longer. We followed the beaten down path of a boot track, passing numerous small rocks on either side until one particular set gave me a bit of a weird feeling. I walked over, and as the mist cleared around the rocks, there were our poles! It was an incredible bit of luck, and maybe a sign that things were letting up and that we would get out of here OK. As we continued down, we attempted the follow the bootpack as best we could, but it kept veering in weird directions and splitting up. For a long time we followed the steps of the only person who had recently worn crampons through the area, as it made the prints stand out. After far too long, we realized that we had dropped too far and gotten too far to the west. The GPS only had a partial charge so I had hesitated turning it on before when we had tracks to follow, but turning it on now was a bit depressing.

We were, as I had insisted we couldn’t possibly be to Nicole, too far to the west and too low. We needed to start cutting back uphill and across the basin. Only trouble is from where we were that meant crossing several stretches of melted out sidehilling heather patches. The slick vegetation on the uneven rocky surface was terribly slippery, and we were both glad we had found our poles to help stabilize ourselves across these patches. After what seemed like hours we finally found a sizeable bootpack again, which led to a trail that I swore was not the same one we used coming in. We took it for a ways, and then set off traversing snow further over, following the GPS towards the location of our camp. We finally topped out on a moraine feature that felt familiar, gained a small trail and rolled into camp – it was full on morning at this point, and everything in camp was soaked – there goes the quick nap we thought we were going to have!

Not wanting to stop for fear of passing out until it was dark again, I pushed Nicole to pack up and walk down to the car right away. Our bags weighed significantly more with the water soaked gear being shoved into them, but once we had everything packed – I felt a sigh of relief knowing that all we had to do was follow a clear trail, even with its sketchiness in places, down to the car. This relief was subdued quite a bit when Nicole paused ahead of me on the trail and I almost fell over myself trying to stop. The rocky trail was more than enough to defeat my fatigued reflexes, and the reality of having the remaining trail to negotiate in this condition set in. We hiked down slowly, managing the stream crossings just fine despite our fears that the wet rock would make them much more difficult. The trail condition for the most part was better than I had recalled for the trek up, and we made decent progress, with limited stops. Once past the section of “class 3 trail” I was really hankering to get to the car, and every switchback below seemed to look like a forest road before we got closer and the reality became apparent. We could finally hear the road, and I galloped down the broad road towards the car, thankful to duck under the tailgate out of the rain while I pulled off all the wet clothes and boots I had been wearing for the past 30 hours. Once we started to drive down the road we realized we weren’t out of the woods quite yet. After about 20 minutes I pulled over and gave the wheel to Nicole, who pushed us down the road 20 more minutes before we gave up, pulled over and napped for 2 hours. Only then did we feel rested enough to make the drive to Marblemount where we refueled at the Shell station with copious amounts of sugar and drinks. The drive home from there went surprisingly smoothly.

I’ve reflected back on this trip many times. We didn’t necessarily make any singular mistakes that cost us a lot of time. The shenanigans to get across the large crack in the gully cost us at least an hour or two, and could have been undertaken in much less with a bit more experience with those conditions. Another hour or so was lost to the first “pitch” that brought us up towards the notch instead of simply scrambling around. The ridge itself was also very mellow for the most part, and simul-climbing should have been possible for us, yet we were a bit intimidated by some of the step across moves at the very beginning, which forced us back into belayed climbing. After we were on route, I think we did very well, blowing past any sort of turn around time not included. All in all I’m glad to have had the experience of getting up Forbidden, and look forward to heading back to do the east ridge, and coming down the now familiar west ridge. I think in a typical snow year, early to mid-July is about the end of the snow in the gully, and unless the NPS ever allows a safer bolted rap route down the nearby buttress, I’ll always plan to be there when there is snow for a descent down the gully.

30+ hours on the move.

[lunaastoir]

fluff/relationships w the mondstadt crew

characters included: diluc, kaeya, and jean

gn! reader as always <3

tw: fluff??? domesticity??? crack??? ideal relationships w people who will never be real??? also mentions of alcohol!

an: so i’m back w a sequel to my “fluff/relationships w the liyue crew” since you guys seemed to really like it <3 thank you my heart is literally melting 😩 this post was getting too long so i excluded some of the characters but expect a part. 2 (more like part 3 but part 2 to the mondstadt version)! 

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diluc

man. this MAN.

that’s it, that’s the headcanon. 

he would literally be the most doting lover in the softest ways

SUCH a soft romantic like you thought you knew love??? nah this man will show you what love is

will constantly leave you things around the winery to convey his silent thank you’s and appreciation for you putting up with him being busy for most of the day

it’s always the most thoughtful things ever too like-

you mentioned how nice it would be to have some fresh lemonade with the hotter weather outside but it was too late in the day to actually go to the market in search of fresh lemons 

the next day you walked downstairs only to be greeted with a pitcher of cool lemonade with a side of lemon bars

there was a note attached to the handle of the pitcher <3 

“i recall you mentioning how lemonade would be perfect for the warmer weather so i decided to make some for you this morning. i hope it’s still cool by the time you drink it. love, d” 

pls sir your hand in marriage

he secretly loves it when you usher him to bed after waking up in the dead of night to see him working by candlelight on reports 

soft hands on his cheeks gently whispering about how, it’s been far too long and come to bed, darling and there will be time for this in the morning

his protests are light given the dark purple hues under his crimson eyes but he’ll still make a little fuss 

don’t let this man fool you tho he’s so so touched that you care enough to check up on him and drag him to bed!!

sometimes on the days he has a bit more free time, the two of you will quickly grab your dinners and race to the highest spot in the winery to watch the setting sun

these moments are always filled with laughter, something you’ve found you’re easily able to pull out of diluc, simply because it’s you 

uncontrollable sobbing

he would let you paint his nails black like the angsty man he is 

frankly he would let you do anything to him if it makes you happy <3 

ok but wait diluc w bLACK NAILS?? AND RINGS??? i would die on the spot ⚰️

on the topic of makeup, this man is surprisingly really good w it 

i like to think he learned after practicing on kaeya when they were younger bc kaeya was really into makeup

you found out after babysitting klee one day and trying failing to draw eyeliner on the sweet girl after her “big brother ‘bedo!”

you hastily grabbed some wipes, gently wiping off the messed up design before attempting to dive back in 

diluc however, had some down time so he decided to check up on his favorite chaotic duo 

only to be met with a pile of dirtied makeup wipes, your frustrated expression, and klee’s growing jitteriness 

swiftly moving to your side, he quietly asked if you needed help 

you glanced up quizzically before handing him the eyeliner, already looking around to find more makeup wipes when this inevitably goes wrong 

to your utter surprise tho the eyeliner is perfect??? two perfect winged lines??? in less than a minute??? WHAT

you just stood there like 😦 before diluc got back up and handed you the eyeliner 

you were short-circuiting, klee was ecstatic, diluc was worried about you 

ok last thing abt diluc 

crack! warning but the both of you like lowkey pranking kaeya 

for diluc it’s revenge on his annoying brother; for you it’s good - natured sibling rivalry fun 

every time the two of you see kaeya, one of you always swipes something of his 

small things really, it could be a pen or a handkerchief

one time, diluc swiped kaeya’s spare eyepatch and from the looks of it, kaeya’s only spare black eyepatch bc he was frantically looking for it yk he’s desperate when he even asked diluc if he saw it

the two of you spent an hour nearly laughing your asses off 

all in all, life w him is so sweet 

kaeya

pretty boy? pretty boy. 

while i can’t guarantee stability, life would never be boring w this man that’s for sure

piggy back rides 🗣 piggy back rides 🗣 piggy back rides 

he LOVES it, the feel of you on his back while he’s walking around mondstadt most likely carrying you to your commission 

he finds it comforting especially since he can hear the rumble of your voice against him while you recount stories, or just babble on about everything under the sun 

he is SO dramatic so obviously when y’all reach the site of the commission he has to kill all the monsters even tho the both of you agreed to split it up evenly 

he makes quick work of his set before stealing some of yours much to your chagrin 

you scold him but can you really be mad at him when he looks drop dead gorgeous freezing the hilichurls the answer is no, no you cannot be

oh my god ok wait-

he does this thing where he tries to spook you in public 

so say you’re getting groceries at the mondstadt general store

you round the corner just minding your own business, looking around, taking in the sunshine 

and suddenly you just hear someone drop in behind you but before you can register anything you hear a soft “boo” and hands circle your waist 

you jump SIKE let’s be honest you shrieked 

meanwhile kaeya’s just laughing his ass off 

you can hear his rich peals of laughter while you attempt to regain your bearings 

he does this so often you SHOULD be used to it but you really aren’t bc mans is SNEAKY-

he cards his fingers in your hair whenever you’re speaking 

he doesn’t know why, it’s just a cute habit and he finds the feel of his fingers in your hair soothing

oH on the topic of comfort, kaeya really likes resting two fingers on the back of your neck???

ik he seems like the type to throw his arm around your shoulder which yes he totally is but during more serious conversations his hand automatically seeks out the warmth of your neck 

your neck feels amazing especially during the warmer months due to his chilly fingers contrasting with your warm skin  

he likes that he’s able to access such a vulnerable part of you and you would willingly let him 

HE GETS YOU MATCHING OUTFITS

no i will NOT take criticism on this i just kNOW he’s that type of guy

it would be those stupid “i’m his” and “they’re mine” sweatshirts like BYE 

it’s so cringy but for some reason it’s oddly adorable and you truly despise it but you can’t seem to say no whenever he asks 

you pretend to ignore the look of pity diluc throws your way whenever he sees you like this

kaeya really loves accessories so i think he would be the type to give you a promise ring or something similar to show that he truly does care for you 

he would brush it off, flirting a little like usual before handing you the ring 

with the way his cheeks softly darken though, you know he’s being genuine 

TICKLE FIGHTS ik i mentioned this for childe but shhhh

he has tickle fingers??? his hands just loOK like they’re itching to tickle someone so you’ll most likely be the unfortunate victim 

he will not show you mercy. at all. he’ll tickle you until there are tears streaming from your eyes, your face is hot, and your voice is hoarse from laughing so damn hard 

it gives him such a rush of serotonin its SO CUTE 

i feel like this goes without saying but he’s super into pda,,, anything and everything is on the table 

hand holding? duh. ass grabs? ofc. carrying you bridal style around mondstadt? why not 

ik he’s typically very playful but once the relationship reaches a certain stage, he’ll slowly start to let down the walls that surround his facade 

very very slowly show you the more realistic parts of him 

the real, damaged pieces of his soul 

he’ll be carefully monitoring your reaction though, any sign of fear or disgust will have him recoiling within himself again and you most likely will never see his true nature ever again 

SO BE CAREFUL 👹

once you’ve seen the parts of him he’s offered to you, the hushed whispers of his past, and the uncertain lines of his future, he will take off his eyepatch 

pretends like he’s not super nervous but he’s SWEATING- 

the prettiest thing you’ve ever seen though hands down 

you can understand why he covers it up but you would like it if he felt comfortable enough to take off the eyepatch occasionally when he’s with you 

also!!! sleeps with his eyepatch side facing you (in the event he wears it to bed) 

if this happens you KNOW he trusts you bc it’s his blindside <3 

anyways life w kaeya will never be boring but he is a very complicated man 

stay with him though, i promise it’ll be worth it 

jean

the key to jean’s heart is coffee and food 

GET HER COFFEE AND FOOD

i am begging you she deserves it 😭

the poor woman works so hard bc the knights are so mf understaffed, this is literally the best way you can ever show her your love and appreciation when she has work

she will MELT if you have a hot shower and dinner waiting for her when she inevitably returns later than she promised

will completely refuse at first with, “you did not have to do this, it’s too much” but shush her as you shOULD bc she deserves the entire world 

she’s the definition of “you do something for me, i’ll return the favor ten times grander”

you leave a flower on her desk bc it reminded you of her??? you’ll wake up to find a whole bouquet of the prettiest windwheel asters you’ve ever seen the next morning along with a thank you note

she’s so sweet BYE

she gets flustered extremely easily so you obviously use this as an opportunity to tease her 

when you’re in public rest your hand on her waist and inch it higher until your hand is underneath her shirt and in contact with her warm skin 

she’ll actually short-circuit its quite adorable 

sometimes y’all will be cuddling and you’ll hear whispers of her insecurities 

“am i a good grand master? will i ever be as valiant as vanessa?”

reassure her!!! tell her that she doesn’t need to be like vanessa, she’s already amazing as jean 

if you haven’t seen her in awhile, track her down and schedule a lunch date 

she never misses appointments and if it’s for you, she’ll gladly make time to see you even if she has to stay up even later than usual 

OH-

GIVE HER MASSAGES 

she has so much tension and the sorest muscles from hunching over papers and running around on errands 

if you sneak into her office and quietly stand behind her before gently pushing down on the sore tendons of her neck, she’ll genuinely fall over on her desk 

so make sure you steady her 😀

after you feel how tight her muscles are though, you drag her to barbara bc she needs a healer asap 😭

while most of your time is spent in her office - you helping out in the ways you can while jean is overseeing knight duties - you still have your fair share of life outside of the favonius headquarters

jean never likes to sit still so whenever you have free time, the both of you head off looking for monsters to clear

bouken da bouken???

adventuring w jean is seriously the funnest thing you could ever do 

it’s just non-stop you accidentally getting into trouble and her having to come help you 

even tho the both of you are dead tired after fighting, what? 20 hilichurl camps now??? the laughter and joy in your eyes shows how you both truly loved every minute of it

it’s both a stress reliever, good fun, and a work-out <3

you’re definitely prone to getting dragged to angel’s share w kaeya 

kaeya and jean sometimes hang out after work at the tavern so inevitably you’re dragged along too 

all three of you are drunk out of your minds which just makes everything a MILLION times funnier 

kaeya slurring over his words makes the two of you start cackling endlessly while diluc just shakes his head making sure to not give you more wine despite your pleas 

angel’s share ft. kaeya and bartender diluc are always the best times fr fr 

life with her literally feels like y’all are married 

so much domesticity it’s so NICE ALJDKSFH

your house is always so clean and the color scheme is impeccable bc jean has such a good eye 

you have a chore schedule 😎 but it almost never works out bc jean ends up doing everything without you knowing- 

you always confront her abt it and she’s like 😁 “i had some time so i did them! no worries tho” like i- time??? where bitc-

oH- she has amazing style so you can bet shopping w her is literally the best experience 

she takes you to all of the hidden gems some places lisa recommended and helps you pick out things 

will 100% get really blushy if you come out in something and ask her for her opinion tho she’s literally the cutest

basically jean is a sweet girl who deserves the entirety of teyvat that is all. 

thanks for reading! if you have any requests don’t hesitate to send them in <3 

[leejeongz]

nsfw a-z JUNKYU (treasure)

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

lots of cuddles and stroking your skin. he wants to make you feel calmer than you did even before the scene, calm enough to fall asleep. he can sense when you’re back to being your usual self but the softness doesn’t stop.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

he has two favourites on his own body and on you! on him, it’s his lips and his legs. his legs because well it’s junkyu he has fabulous legs duh. and his lips because he constantly notices you staring at them. he bites them on purpose when he sees you staring at them and knows that you want to kiss them 24/7

on you, he likes your hair and your fingers the most. he likes the way your fingers wrap around his dick and how you tease the tip with your index finger, sending him straight to heaven. and he likes to stroke your hair. he knows it sends shivers down your spine when you’re already turned on.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

he definitely looks forward to seeing you covered in his cum. even if you let him cum inside you, he doesn’t because he wants to see it actually on your body. he lovessss watching it trickle down your fingers before you suck it off them and also clean the remaining liquid off his dick too. he also sometimes has you take selfies on his phone after he’s finished all over your face for a later date.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

when you sit by him in your short dresses and skirts, he wants to do nothing more than to slowly inch his hand up your inner thigh and finger you, making you leave a damp patch on the seat, but he’s nervous that other people in the room might notice.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

2 different partners, one of which was a long time girlfriend, the other a one night stand. he can be romantic, he can be distant, he knows it all. he’s still a little shy with saying things out loud, but that doesn’t affect his skill and will happily discuss things via text.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

ride him and he’ll be your whiney little bitch. don’t get me wrong, he’s still in charge, but the noises and the faces he pulls have you fooled for a second. he doesn’t have a preference, reverse cowgirl and cowgirl are even, both get him to cum quicker than any other position.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

he’s a silly guy, you think that’s gonna stop just because he’s got his dick out? he’s so loving, even if you are friends with benefits, he just wants to make you smile and to make you feel comfortable and safe, as well as making himself feel comfortable too. a tense atmosphere is only saved for those scenes where you are mad at each other.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

he’s always completely shaved. balls too :)

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

he’s a huge romantic and is solely focused on you. even if he’s desperate, he’s still gonna make it loving and share lots of intimate moments with you.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

he takes his time when it comes to masturbation. he wants to set the scene in his mind as takes a lot to actually turn him on when you aren’t there. he usually gets off at his desk to those pics he’s taken of you or to just his imagination. he gets caught by his members a lot, but he somehow convinces them he’s just working on a song.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

he loves when you call him sir or master, especially when you look at him all innocently. it lets him know that you know your place and that he has you wrapped around his little finger. call him one of these in a sfw context and that’s when you know you’re in for a good time.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

studio or at his desk in his room. although it not ideal for his job, the best sex usually happens when you’re distracting him from something you can tell that he’s stressed with. giving him head while he’s working or while he’s gaming usually gets him really turned on and as much as he’s saying that you guys can’t do anything at the time, you definitely can and will.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

pictures of you! it’s not secret that he has a folder of pictures of you that he uses to get off to. your selfie’s alone really turn him on, especially the ones where you have your fingers in your mouth. but of course there’s plenty of nudes and little teasers in there too. and those pics of your face covered in him cum of course.

lingerie!! boy loves seeing you in the sexiest pieces and sets, so much so that he doesn’t mind splashing the cash and buying you some as a “just because” gift. he’s very gentle (most of the time) and does not rip them because they’re stunning on you! but sometimes he gets carried away and tugs on them a little too much while pulling you towards him.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

no food play. it’s too messy and too much of a hassle after a scene when he’s super tired.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

my mind always goes to junkyu getting head under his desk while he’s producing a song, tell me that wouldn't be hot. i can imagine him to be quite whiney but he just lets you do your thing without telling you how to suck it. running the underneath of your tongue over the tip is for sure something that he CRAVES. if he asks he gets, but he just wants you to do it anyway without even being asked.

his oral skills aren’t anything special, they’re good enough, but he gets you so worked up beforehand that the slightest touch will make you cum. he loves to press little kisses against your inner thighs before actually getting to eating you out.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

most times, he wants it slow. he wants to drag out every last moment and make the most of everything and so he keeps the pace slow. he doesn’t wanna tire you or himself out, knowing that you’ll both crave more after the first round. but sometimes he’s a little desperate, there’s nothing slow about it when he’s like this.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

he’s not a fan at first, but you soon show him the wonders of quickies in a vacant room where you can get caught, and he’s craving them all the damn time. he becomes a quickie lover and sometimes all he needs is to be satisfied for a while.

honestly though, he wouldn’t choose them over somewhere comfortable like your bedroom and wonders why you’d rather do stuff quickly when you could just wait a few more hours and get ruined properly. if only he understood that sometimes, you just cannot wait, and that it’s all his fault.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

he gets excited at just the mere thought of experiments and venturing into a new world with you. the potential danger of literally anything out of the ordinary happening is something that really gets him going. he’s down to try anything once if you are, but he gets a little shy about discussing them.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

usually 2 rounds with a small break in the middle for water and such. he can last around 15 minutes per round inside of you and he’s pretty proud of himself for that lmao, especially since he’s receiving head for like 20 mins lol

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

he loves knowing that you use toys when he’s not around, it gets him horny to think about you holding a vibrator against your clit while you think about him. but i don’t think such toys would be welcome in the bedroom while he was there.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

angry/jealous sex, there is no teasing at all. he gets what he wants and that’s it, there’s nothing in it for you (or so he thinks). if you don’t cum that’s your problem because he’s given you ample opportunity.

normal, “everyday” sex, is full of teasing, especially when it comes to giving you oral/foreplay. there’s lots of kissing, lots of orgasm denial and LOTS of touches and kisses. pressing light kisses onto your clothed clit was his signature move, just one had you wanting to cum sometimes.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

he’s whiney as FUCK okay. he’s very loud,you can definitely hear him, maybe even some other people too hehe. sometimes he sends you voice notes of him moaning when he knows you’re horny and alone. he’s not really into dirty talk because he doesn’t want to say anything that will ruin the mood.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

he runs his hand through his hair A LOT while you two are being intimate, especially when your lips are wrapped around his length. usually his hair gets sweaty and also, he wants to see you, so you catch him brushing it out of his face a lot.

he’s definitely a tits man. he loves to hold them, sleep on them, suck on them, whatever you/he wants. he holds them while he fucks you because he knows it hurts, it’s a win win. they aren’t always sexual to him either, they’re just another part of you that he can admire (but he’s too shy to compliment you on them and also thinks it would be kinda weird if he did lol)

he. kisses. you. constantly. the kisses are often broken by the thrusts but he doesn’t care and he actually thinks it makes the whole thing more romantic.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

just over average length with a litter under average thickness. i think he’s a show-er too.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

honestly, not that high. he goes through spells of not wanting any to wanting it twice a day, but on the whole, it's not extraordinarily high nor low

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

he’s pretty tired, but he doesn’t want to fall asleep until you have or you’ve said it’s okay for him to sleep. he’s a little groggy so you usually make him go to sleep whenever, but it’s also really cute 🥺

[motionbound]

hiyo!! it’s melo again with a second muse, sad human dude seong uihyeon who’s been going thru it since the festival 😭 he moved recently from jeju to work with the aeternals as a therapist, only to lose his wife during the festival to a berserk aeternal. he’s always idolised eden’s aeternals as true superheroes but their response after the festival has totally cracked his worldview & he’s still grieving so 😔 pages here ( stats, bio ), tldr & plot ideas under the cut! hit the ♡ if you’d wanna plot, this is a sideblog so i can’t follow/etc but u can call me beep me at @iinksplit​ or ask for discord!

*tw death mention—much of his backstory is tied to his wife’s death & the impact it has on him, so this is a general warning for the tldr & plots under the cut!

TLDR

just a dude from jeju; he grew up reading lots of comics & generally believing in the good of people, the world, the superheroes out there!

he’s always wanted to come to eden to work with the aeternals, despite being a human. one of those 'i dont have a superpower but i can help the ones who do!! so they can help more people!!’ kinda people, so he went into counselling and found himself a job with the aeternal psych unit once he graduated

uihyeon had it all: working with the aeternals to help people, married the girl of his dreams, started building a life in eden & all that

at least, until pax centennial festival

his wife died during the event, one of the many? few? casualties while the aeternals were going berserk with their powers. in my head it was probably something pretty instant & irreversible, and he’s entirely traumatised from witnessing it

the aeternal who killed his wife simply slapped an nda down & sent him off with a whole lotta money in exchange for his silence. it’s confusion & uncertainty & a considerable amount of pressure placed on him to sign that’s the reason he agrees to it, but now that the dust has settled, he’s starting to question... everything, really

so now he’s struggling to reconcile what he believed about the world, his trust in aeternals & the good of people shaken up totally. it’s starting to affect his job too, questioning what he’s told in his sessions with aeternal clients & having to pull himself back from it, because he still wants to do good somehow & he used to think this was the path for him but—is it?

huge chara insp is hughie from the boys w a tinge of butcher!

personality / misc facts: aquarius sun, cancer moon, capricorn rising. before the festival, he was honestly a really friendly, chill dude. helpful & accommodating, with a whole lotta idealism packed underneath his sensible sweater vest. prone to withdrawing & bottling things up, which has only become worse since his wife’s death. right now, he’s very much in the anger/depression stages of grief, sharper around the edges. easily frustrated, mostly at himself, but also at the world in general. grasping at what used to be familiar instead of processing the feelings like he knows he should, & not coping well at all

lil notes on his wife! in my head they were childhood friends & he had a crush on her for forever, finally got the courage to ask her out way too late when they were already basically in love & they fast-tracked their way through dating & marriage after that hehe she had a similar sort of occupation, wanting to help people too? a lil more practical than him, the half who had all her shit together. i’m so sorry for fridging her rip she’s gna pop up occasionally in his thoughts but more a manifestation of his grief than a real representation of her!

PLOTS

the aeternal who killed his wife—lots of plotting needed for this but i’d love to have this connection

the boys / anti-aeternals agenda—part of his ( non- ) healing has been thinking about taking revenge on the aeternals & he entertains thoughts of actually seeking help, until. he actually does contact them & now he’s not sure what to do

siblings—i don’t see him as an only child, though he was quite an independent kid. as his now only family in the city, though, i think he’d rely a lot on his sibling

good friends—someone who knows just how badly he’s doing & checks up on him once in a while / is trying to help him process this healthily, even tho he’s fighting accepting their help

aeternal clients—i imagine it’s a small-ish psych unit, so he’s familiar with a lot of the aeternals, even if he doesn’t work directly with them! might even just see a couple as work buddies instead of clients? although their interactions now are tense & often angrier than they’re used to him being...

meta friends—he believes ( believed? ) really strongly that meta abilities have a purpose. that they can do good. he’s not sure about that anymore, but someone he used to help out / attempt to learn more about their ability to help them?

people who knew his wife—maybe they knew her better than him, or vice versa? super open to different kinds of dynamics stemming from this! or maybe even a sibling-in-law?

[2021fuckitup]

“ WE GET HIGH WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS”

Helpful hints for newborn to old fuckers...

Why A Torch Lighter Is Ideal:-Your product liquifies, then smokes, almost instantly

-It is MUCH easier to control the direction the meth flows, as well as what is receiving heat

-You can get MUCH bigger hits

-You can avoid burning it so much easier than with other flames

-No flickering flame

-Butane refills are cheap as fucking shit (I got a hairspray-sized bottle of Zippo butane for the price of 2 disposable lighters)

-Don’t burn your thumb as much

-Sessions can be initiated and/or finished faster

Downsides-If you don’t pay attention, you can burn the shit out of your product, or yourself. BE CAREFUL, PAY ATTENTION, AND BE PATIENT

-Smoke through your stash quicker

-Possibly worse burns because its hotter than a bic

How to smoke meth with torch lighter for beginners:

1)First ensure that your pipe is clean.

Why?

For the ice to smoke properly. DO NOT load fresh product in a pipe with product that has been smoked, burned, or otherwise heated. If you load fresh on top of a still smokable bowl, the new and old will melt/smoke at different speeds/temperatures (can’t remember which is which right now, but I think old smokes faster), ensuing that it is very difficult to evenly heat the product. Then you get spots where part of the crystalized mass liquifies and will move with the flame, but some of it needs more heat, and for me at least, some always gets burned or darkened, and has a bad taste. If you load fresh product in a pipe with burnt shit in there, IT WILL TASTE LIKE SHIT. It will often also not melt/smoke right, AND your new stuff will taste like burnt stuff, which is THE WORST taste in the world (IM0). (FYI-I’ve heard that blowing cigarette smoke through a oil pipe (like you were going to hit it, but exhaling smoke through it instead) removes the taste. I have tried with pot smoke and it didn’t work, but have read many people say that cigarettes work.

How to Clean the Inside of A Pipe-If it is not clean, a very easy method is to fill a microwavable container (like a coffee mug) with 50% water, 50% bleach, and put the pipe (bowl facing downwards) in the water.

-Put it in the microwave for 4 minutes (yes, seriously that long-I tried after 1, 2, and 3 minutes and it didn’t work. May even take 5.)

-Let cool. Once cooled, remove from mug and drain all water.

-Using Q-tips, insert through carb hole and “mop up” the stuff left in the bowl. This may take several qtips depending on the bowl. If there is still black/brown stuff in the bowl, apply more pressure

(be careful not to break the bowl by pressing the q tip too hard on the sphere, OR accidentally pressing on the side of the carb when trying to reach around inside with q tip.) If there is still stuff in there, I have read that small bits of Magic Eraser stuffed in, and manipulated with a pole (like a q tip) work wonders, but also have not tried.

How to Clean the Outside of a PiPE

-Using a wet rag, or balled-up wet paper towels/toilet paper/napkins/etc, rub the outside of the bowl. This should cause the stuff on the outside to transfer onto the paper.

-If this doesn’t work, steel wool may work.

Handling/Prepping Product

-Dont handle meth by hand. It’s bad for your skin, and little amounts will dissolve. Instead, use:

Ideally: a 7/11 straw (this is a straw whose last inch or so is a scoop, sometimes used for slurpees or w/e those frozen drinks are; these straws I have found to be ideal for handling all sorts of drugs).

Realistically: Normal Straw: Straw been sealed on one end (tape, seal it with flame), and on the other has a 45 degree angle (45 degree is diagonal; if you cut a square in half diagonally, the diagonal line is 45). This allows you to scoop small fragments out of a bag, tin, or other carrying device easily, as the angled mouth scoops up crumbs, especially in corners of bags; while the sealed back prevents any from accidentally spilling.

Size/Shape

-Make sure your product is all of the same consistency. I find it best to use one crystal, preferably large (but not to large). I find the size of a tic tac, or slightly larger, to be ideal. Also, cubic or rectangular is best possible shape IME. I will often break long, skinny crystals because they dont burn as well as more square ones, and broken into small squares, they will smoke more evenly.

-While you can load bigger crystals with smaller bits/shake, I generally find it is best to load similar sized rocks. That is, load all shake, load two or three crystals of equal size, or put one crystal in there (usually a big one).

-If you need to break a crystal into smaller bits to make equal sized crystals (or to make odd shaped crystal more square), place a sanitary, nonabsorbent material on top of/around the crystal (no dollars bills here, printer paper works great.) and either snap it in two, or push against a surface. If pressing, you can use a finger, debit card, whatever, just slowly apply more pressure so you can crush to consistency of your liking. If you crush it all the way, you have shake(aka powder).

Differences Between Methods

Single Crystal (often large): Crystal will slowly lose mass as it melts, evenly becoming a pool (as long as you thoroughly spread it around the bowl).

Multiple Little Ones: If you evenly heat them: Will slowly melt into each other. Will be left with a very spread-out puddle, possibly multiple spread out ones.

If unevenly heated: There will be areas meth of varying thickness, accompanied by uneven melting and probable darkening/burning,.

Shake: Will liquify very quickly; little bits that haven’t yet been heated may go to weird parts of the bowl when you begin twisting, so you end up with tiny blotches and a single large or a few smaller puddles.

Loading Product

-Using straw, scoop your product into the chamber. Keeping upright, grab oil pipe and tilt at an angle so that the carb is pointing sideways, or angled down slightly. This will allow you to insert straw opening into carb before tipping the straw, ensuring you don’t miss the hole and lose any.

-Once inserted, twist pipe (while holding onto straw of course) until carb is once again pointing up. Tap straw to get all the little bits into the pipe (if meth is still sticking, use a scraper of some kind).

-Remove straw, and put pipe on level surface, BETWEEN TWO OBJECTS. THE PIPE WILL ROLL PEOPLE, AND WILL SPILL ALL YOUR GODDAMN PRODUCT AND/OR FALL ON THE FLOOR AND BREAK. UGH!

Now that you have a loaded pipe, ensure that you are ready to begin. Suggestions include

-Water

(lots of it!!) Both meth and smoking dehydrate you, and the more dehydrated you are, the more you will suffer from dental damage and brain damage (neurotoxicity). A large amount of methamphetamine neurotoxicity (and most dopamine toxicity) is temperature-dependent, as it often induces hyperthermia (This is similar to MDMA, aka XTC, Molly, rolls, etc). Water cools your body.

You should be urinating with irritating frequency, and should be voiding clear urine, otherwise you are already dehydrated (unless taking assloads of vitamins or something).

-Music

I can’t even describe how much music enhances the experience of smoking meth. It synergizes well-the meth makes the music sound insane, and in turn the music intensifies the high, making me feel even more intelligent/strong/attractive/cool/special. This is the part of the high I crave, and it rarely occurs (at least with the intensity I like) without music.

-Spare lighter/butane refill

When smoking meth, you are always running out of fuel. The spare lighter is also useful because lighters get really hot when ignited for long periods of time (like when smoking meth) and you can swap them out.

-Wet (but not sopping) rag or bundled tissues/paper towels/toilet paper/etc

This is to set the pipe on when not using it (a hot pipe will burn fabrics, fucking up whatever its on as well as the pipe), and to cool down the pipe after a hit. The pipe stays hot for a while, and if you don’t hit it, drugs are being lost/wasted. If you cool the pipe, it will stop heating the drugs faster (duh). Do not do this immediately after getting the pipe really hot-heat and cold on glass can break it. Wait for it to cool slightly, then use it.

When you use the rag to cool underneath liquified dope, it will emit a lot of smoke while crystalizing I read somewhere that the meth actually vaporizes/produces smoke when it hits cooler surface, but I don’t know the validity of that. I do know that cold makes it smoke more though.

-Salt Water

Swishing and gargling salt water while smoking meth (ie after a hit, and definitely after a session) will help prevent canker sores, help kill bacteria (which will inhibit meth mouth) clear mucus in back of throat (which will build up from smoking ice, and may possibly absorb some of it), and prevent sore throat. Its really easy-just add table salt to water (not too much). Some people say to use hot water, but there is more bacteria in hot water pipes, so I use cold.

-Biotene Products

These are oral healthcare products designed to combat dry mouth. There is an oral gel that you kind of spread in your mouth and coats it to act like a artificial saliva. It tastes kinda bad (not awful) and feels weird, but it beats dry/cracking skin, and is good for oral health. They also make alcohol-free (alcohol makes dry mouth worse) mouthwash that I find makes me produce a bnch of saliva for like 10-30 minutes, which can be helpful. They have toothpaste, but that is only to not irritate dry mouth. Finally, they have oral mouthspray, which is apparently the best, but I have not tried yet.

-Weed

Weed makes meth smoking more fun I find. Its hard to describe. Go slow as you may have negative anxiety reaction

Positioning:

The pipe will need to be twisted back and forth, so for me, I hold it in the middle of the stem between my middle finger and thumb. This allows me to easily roll the pipe back and forth. The carb is facing the sky/ceiling, and I have the pipe slanted, so the bowl is slightly closer to the floor than the mouthpiece. This allows me to put my index finger over the mouthpiece. so that when I first heat up the bowl all the initial smoke (that you will not yet inhale because it is not super thick and you want to build up a good hit) goes up the stem and is trapped by my finger rather than out through the little carb hole (which it will do when the stem is filled with smoke). Finally, it also allows me to use my pinky to cover the carb (I rarely do this because often the carb is hot).

Lighter

[Torch] Lighter is held in the other hand, underneath the dope in the bowl. Adjust your flame to lowest setting (if you can). While initially hitting the bowl, since your mouth is not on the mouthpiece, you can hold the pipe in front of you while you heat to gaug distance between flame and bowl, and make sure the flame is under the drugs. However, once you begin inhaling, you have a much worse view (through the bowl), and it is easy to hold the lighter too close (or far, but usually close), or to have it not even under the bowl. Due to poor depth perception (which I assume is from the drugs), or some visual warping from the curvature of the glass, its really easy to do this, and happens a lot. A mirror is helpful so you can see yourself. Another option is attaching flexible tubing (like aquarium tubing) to the mouthpiece so you can inhale through that while holding the pipe in front of you. This will also enable you to make meth bongs (search it).

Philosophy of Smoking Meth

Meth becomes a clear liquid when heated, then vaporizes into a white smoke. The idea is to heat whatever you placei n the pipe evenly so that it all melts down to liquid, then, by twisting the pipe, spread the liquid all around the bowl, so that it doesn’t stay in a hot place for too long and burn. Once liquified, the pipe can be twisted. This allows you to put your flame ahead of the liquid (think of the liquid chasing the flame), so that once the glass is heated, it will fall/roll down the curve towards your lighter and smoke. As you get close carb, you begin to twist the other way, keeping the liquid following your flame. However, with a torch lighter, you can soon twist the pipe without the flame and the liquid will still run for a while, and when it doesn’t is when you reapply the flame.

Quick Info On Torch Lighters

Torch lighters are very hot, much hotter than bics. Their flame is much more intense, and the heat above is much hotter than a bic. Therefore, you must keep much more distance between your lighter and pipe than with a bic. It will vary according to lighter type, pipe thickness, and especially flame size; but my flame is maybe between 1/3 and ½ of an inch, and my lighter stays 1-3 inches away from the pipe; with me increasing distance the longer its lit.

-Also, you do not heat the bowl with a torch lighter for long periods of time like you do a bic. Once it begins to smoke, quit using the lighter, and only reapply once the liquid quits moving when you twist the pipe. Also, be sure to twist pipe while lighting the whole time with a torch lighter, even if it is slowly. You cannot really get away with heating in one spot for a short period of time like you can with a bic.

Smoking

Premelt:

-Keeping your flame 1-2 inches below the bowl, roll flame in a circle around the perimeter of your product, so the outermost portion begins to liquify. Remember to continue moving the flame.

-As it begins to liquify, begin twisting the pipe back and forth. You want to heat the edges of the product and then the glass adjacent to the edges to make it flow there. However, when reversing the direction of the twist, make sure to heat the inside/middle for a moment as well so that it will melt once the dope bordering it has melted.

-Eventually you will have a puddle of liquid that is mobile-stop heating! COntinue to twist the pipe to spread the stuff around and wait for it to recrystalize (turn back into a liquid). You can speed this up by touching pipe with damp rag/paper towels/etc, but I like to let it cool by itself the first time. Wait for the pipe to cool down-its worth it.

Smoking

(this is assuming you are covering the mouthpiece and have the pipe angled like I mentioned in positioning)

-Now you should have a thin puddle of clear crystals stuff. Once again, heat with flame around the perimeter (much bigger this time, but it will also melt faster now because its thinner). Once melted, it should soon begin to smoke. Cease lighting once it begins smoking a fair bit and continue to twist.

-Because you have your finger over the mouthpiece and the pipe angled, the hot vapor will travel up the stem, and be trapped. Once vapor begins to emerge out of the carb hole, quickly take your finger off the stem and begin inhaling (do this quick because the stem is filled with vapor).

To Inhale:

You do not need to actually suck most of the time. With the pipe angled, simply forming a seal on the mouthpiece is usually enough, and if you have to inhale, do not suck like smoking. Instead, inhale like you are breathing but VERY slowly/softly. It takes very little pressure and the bigger hit you get, the better IMO.

Reheating

Use the torch for very brief periods of time. Once the liquid is moving and smoking agian, stop. You can also use more, but never use less once its burned.

Finishing your hit:

If your lungs are full and it is still smoking, cover the carb and mouthpiece and continue twisting. I like to hold my hits for 4-8 seconds, some say blow out right away, but I dont like that. You can also use a damp rag or damp paper towels/toilet paper/napkins/etc and wipe the bowl, to cool it down and make the liquid recrystalize faster (dont do this when the bowl is still super hot because it can break it). This will make it smoke a lot for a second so I like to do it while inhaling.

For Experienced Users:I have found the torch lighter to be far superior to the bic. With the bic, I would experience uneven and slow heating/melting. Now, I have almost instantaneous liquification, followed by thick smoke, and as long as I use the torch sparingly, no darkening of product. The trick is to be patient and methodical:

-Use the torch 1-3 inches away from the bowl

-Move it quickly

-“Encourage” the liquid to trael all over the bowl by leading it with the flame

-Use inward swirling movements, especially during the melting phase

-I recommend using single, squareish crystals for this.

[ptergwen]

last christmas | pt. 2

❆ series masterlist ❆

w/c: 2.5k

warnings: one suggestive joke and a couple of angsty moments

a/n: yo i forgot that harry was actually in this movie as an extra? that’s kinda funny to me but anyways pls send requests (ik it’s annoying i keep asking i’m just so bored y’all help) and enjoyyy

━━━ *:･。.

today feels better than most days. the throbbing headache you usually wake up with isn’t there. plus, you have your date with tom later. it still feels surreal to say that. it still feels surreal he’s your friend’s brother, and you only found out three days ago.

you throw on some sweats and head into the living room. your roommate alex is in front of the tv with a bowl of cereal. she puts it down, the spoon making an obnoxiously loud clink. you’re sensitive to sound, so you unintentionally wince.

“sorry, y/n/n. i thought you had the day off, no?” she asks, lowering the tv for your sake. you smile at the gesture and go to grab your coat. “i do. i just wanna get breakfast.” “we have stuff here,” alex reminds you and picks up her cereal for emphasis. she’s careful not to drop the spoon this time. laughing to yourself, you shrug into your coat.

“i’ll pass. i wanted to say hi to harry, anyway.” “right, tonight’s the night.” she turns her head towards you and smirks. “you’re shagging his brother.” your eyes go comically wide. “no i’m not! he’s taking me out somewhere,” you defend and button up your coat as fast as you can. it’s time to get out of here.

“i’ll make plans just in case,” alex calls out as you shuffle to the door. “yeah, bye!” you shout back. you planned on asking if she wanted anything, but you were too distracted. oh well.

━ ❆

the café isn’t too crowded when you get there. harry is on register, so he’s probably in a good mood. he eyes you curiously when you step up. you give him a big smile.

“you’re not in today,” he says quietly, pushing up the santa hat he’s wearing. you stifle a laugh. you’re all supposed to dress up festively, but you don’t. your manager made an exception. one of your co workers is watching harry, so he fixes the hat. it’s not done without a long exhale.

“i’m here for coffee,” you explain and glance up at the menu. harry squints at you. “you couldn’t have gone anywhere else?” feigning offense, you put your hand on your chest. “why, you don’t want to see me?” “when you’re supposed to be home resting, no.” he taps a button on the register. “what can i get you?”

“first of all, i have a date later. that won’t be happening,” you tell him smugly. he would try to act annoyed, but he’s honestly happy for you. tom, too. “can i have an iced coffee with liquid sweetener? please?” harry raises an eyebrow. “room for milk?” “sure,” you almost chirp. he can’t help but grin.

“i haven’t seen you this happy the whole time i’ve known you,” he mumbles while punching in your order. your smile fades into a concerned grimace. “is that okay, do you think?” harry looks up at you again. “why wouldn’t it be?” “because, i mean, it’s only one date. it could end up going no where.”

you lean over the counter so you can talk quieter. “what would i be happy about then?” “excuse me?” a woman interrupts your conversation louder than necessary. you’re trying to search harry’s face for an answer, but he doesn’t give you one. “one second, sorry,” he apologizes to the customer. you stand up right again.

“tom wouldn’t do all this if he didn’t feel something,” harry nearly whispers while you get out your money. you read your total befofe he could tell you. you let your hand linger in his when you hand him the cash. “you’ll have more than one night of happiness. you deserve it.”

you’re starting to get a bit emotional, so you pull your hand back. you nod and manage a small smile. “thank you, harry. really.” “you’ll let me know how it goes?” he checks. “tomorrow, yeah. have a good shift.” you give him a finger wave and go off to get your coffee. he waves back.

━ ❆

tom gets a text from harry a few minutes after you leave.

y/n is really special. don’t be a div tonight.

he scoffs at his phone and shuts it off. your smile pops into his mind then. he only got to see it once, but he can’t seem to forget it.

harry is right. you are really special, and he better not mess this up.

━ ❆

you and tom decided on eight for your date. he’s meeting you outside your place because wherever you’re going is in walking distance. you bundle up accordingly in your fluffiest jacket and some earmuffs. you’ve never worn them before, but they’ll be your best friend tonight. they’re also cute. this is the time to be cute.

tom buzzes to let you know he’s there at eight sharp. his punctuality is kind of a surprise. you don’t know much about the real him, but this is rare from what you’ve gathered. you tell him you’re coming and hop out the door.

the thing alex said earlier does cross your mind, and she did leave you the apartment. never mind all of that. you try to think of anything but that before you get outside.

“hey,” tom greets as you walk down the stairs. he grins playfully at your attire. “you look cozy.” “you don’t.” he’s wearing a thin black jacket with a flannel underneath. it’s not ideal for the middle of winter in london. a smug smile pulls at your lips.

“you’re gonna walk in that?” you gesture to his outfit, moving so you’re next to him. he hums. “i’ll let you tease me for it the whole way there.” the two of you start walking side by side. it doesn’t take long for you to fall into step. “the whole way? how far is it?” you raise an eyebrow.

“twenty minutes maybe? it can’t be too bad. we have loads to talk about,” tom says rather suggestively. you look over and he’s smirking. there’s never a dull moment with this man. that’s actually just what you need right now. “true. you start,” you prompt him, your arm brushing against his. “tell me all about you.” he leans closer to you instinctively.

“well, i’m an actor. obviously,” tom shrugs like it’s no big deal, making you laugh quietly. he really likes your laugh. “besides that. like, what do you do when you’re not acting?” you ask, eyes fixed on him. he’s so pretty under the streetlights. all the time, really. “this is so boring, but i love golf. i’m rubbish, though,” he says the second part under his breath.

“and i thought you were good at everything,” you tease, tom faking a frown. “no, but seriously. it’s probably nice to do some regular stuff when you can.” he exhales in a way that seems reflective. “exactly, i like having some separation. what about you?” “what do i do when i’m not acting?” you ask sarcastically. “sure,” he plays along.

you think about it while you turn the corner. tom watches you intently, like you’re about to say something actually interesting. you’re not. “not much anymore.” he’s about to ask what you mean by anymore, but you keep going. “i took a gap year from uni, so i’ve been getting that sorted,” you continue, looking up at the dark sky. this isn’t your favorite discussion.

“makes sense. what are you studying?” also not your favorite discussion. “i’m undecided. i was thinking about psychology, but...” you search for something, anything you can to change the subject. the first thing you see is the first thing you mention. “your ears are bright red right now,” you giggle and point at one. tom presses his hands to them, feeling how cold they are.

“damn, you’re right,” he gives in to your conversation from earlier. without thinking about it, you pull your earmuffs off. you put them around his head instead. they’re pink with white snowflakes on them. tom looks cuter with them than you do, you think. “here. these should make them a normal color.”

“aw, but i don’t want you to be cold,” he protests and goes to take them off. you grab his hand before he can. “i’m not.” grinning, he properly takes your hand in his. your fingers lace together like you’ve held hands a million times. he lets them drop between you two and keeps leading the way to your mystery spot.

you swing your hands back and forth, smiling when you feel his grip tighten. tom pats one of the earmuffs. “i think we’ll both be warm once we get there.” “where exactly is ‘there’?” you laugh out. it was supposed to be a surprise, but you have to know. he points at something straight ahead. you’re still too far to see it.

“yeah, i can’t tell what that is,” you confirm. his reply is a satisfied hum. “good. let me keep you in suspense for at least five more minutes.” “you’re cheeky, aren’t you?” he chuckles and swings your hands again. “i’ve been told.”

you two finally end up at a hot chocolate stand. there are white lights strung in the trees surrounding it, music playing quietly into the night. the atmosphere welcomes and comforts you as soon as you get on line.

“i figured it would be nice to get one of these rather than making them for a change,” tom fills you in. he seems unsure of it now that you’re here, his voice lower than before. harry’s text is replaying in his head. he wants this to be good enough, more than good enough. should he have planned something more? his nerves die down when you squeeze his hand in yours.

this is the perfect low pressure date you’d hoped for. the focus is on each other and not some fancy meal. you were right about the movies not changing tom. “this place is really cute. i like it.” you move up on line together. “and my hot chocolates kind of suck, so yeah. it is.” “no, i bet they’re delicious,” he reassures you with one of his famous eye crinkling grins.

you chat more about your barista skills and all the kitchen disasters harry has had to save you from. the story of the time you made foam explode all over the countertops has him giggling. his laugh is contagious, so you end up joining in. your laughter eventually quiets because it’s your turn to order.

“hi, we’ll have two large hot chocolates?” tom orders for you two. you shoot him a curious look. “large? i’ll never finish.” the sizes here are huge, which is part of their gimmick. it’s also why tom found it interesting. the joke is that the stand itself is small, but they have gigantic drinks.

“leftovers, then.” he winks at you. you’re disappointed you have to let his hand go while he pays. the cashier says your drinks will be ready shortly. tom thanks him and turns back to you. “you probably got in so much trouble, huh?” he asks about your work horror story. you look him over for a few seconds.

you’re shocked how genuinely interested he is in everything you tell him. there are much cooler things he could be talking about, but he wants to hear from you. it makes you feel like there’s something between you two already. like, you’re old friends or soulmates or anything bigger than two strangers on a first date.

even though it’s still early to tell, you definitely have a connection of some kind.

“nope. i’m better at cleaning than i am at making cappuccinos,” you remark, the cashier coming back with two large hot chocolates. tom hands you yours first. he takes his after. “thank you so much,” he tells the man again. “have a nice night,” you add. the two of you take your drinks to a small table under a tree.

you sit across from each other, tom setting the earmuffs down. he pushes them back to you with a smile playing on his lips. “i like those better on you,” you murmur before taking a sip of hot chocolate. “pink’s my color,” he agrees and does the same. it’s so good that you decide to have some more, even though there’s steam coming from the lid.

“maybe i will finish all of this.” “i knew you’d like it.” tom laughs behind his cup. he got all worked up about it for nothing. you’re having one of your best nights in a while, which almost makes you not want to bring up the next topic. it’s sadly inevitable, so you might as well get it out of the way. christmas.

“so, do you have any plans for christmas?” you start, downing another sip. tom puts his drink down and leans back in the chair. “i’m staying over my mum and dad’s. we’ll have our traditional holland celebration.” he smiles to himself just thinking about it. you’re happy he has something to look forward to. you don’t.

“are you doing anything?” there’s the big question. people usually get awkward when you go into detail, which is exactly why you won’t. “actually, no.” his excitement changes to confusion. he furrows his eyebrows and sits up again. “you don’t celebrate?” “i do, just not anymore. not this year, at least.”

tom is extremely curious what this ‘anymore’ is about. it’s the second time you’ve mentioned it.

“i used to love it. my christmas spirit ran out, i guess,” you eleborate, eyes shifting down to the frozen grass. tom almost frowns. it’s not because he pities you. no one likes that. christmas is one of, if not, his favorite times of year. he just wishes the whole world could be happy this holiday season. the lovely girl sitting in front of him, especially.

there has to be something he can do.

“no, you can always get it back,” he says softly, searching for your eyes. “i’ll help you.” you look up at him again and blink back the tears you feel coming. tom must feel so lost right now. he wouldn’t be with context. you’re going to tell him what happened when you’re ready because you do want him to understand. trusting him feels like an instinct.

“how?” your voice comes out even quieter than his. you pick up your drink to distract yourself. “let’s see,” tom thinks aloud. he snaps when he gets an idea. “have you done any decorating?” “my roommate put up a tree. she never did the ornaments, though.” he gasps over dramatically, earning a laugh from you.

“you can’t leave a naked tree sitting around.” “i told her it looked stupid,” you sigh and sip your hot chocolate. tom holds out a hand for you. “we should go to the shops”

it would be easy to say no. it would be easy to go back home and hide under your covers and avoid the missed calls from your family. the catch is, easy isn’t progress. you can’t move past this unless you work to get it done.

you take tom’s hand and stand up from the table.

“we should also get a ride this time.”

[jenomark]

A-Z Analysis of Ten

💚 Smut

💚 18+

💚 This is only fantasy

A ⇥ Aftercare

  After sex, his body relaxes more. His body becomes lazy, but his mind becomes more alert. He becomes chatty, but not that physically affectionate. The level of comfort he feels with you will have him asking you if you liked how he fucked you, and if there are any ways he could improve. 

B ⇥ Body Part

  His favorite part of his body changes every day. He gains a new appreciation for his ass, his chest, and his face on different days due to high self-esteem. Rather than point out exactly what he likes, he’ll say he likes everything because he wants it to be true. On you, he has the same way of thinking. He’s not greedy. He’ll take and love it all.

C ⇥ Cum

  It’s never sweet or that enjoyable of a taste. He knows that because he’s definitely tasted his own before. Finds the faces you make when you come so interesting. Getting someone to come feels like a personal victory for him. 

D ⇥ Dirty Secret

  His dirtiest secret is that he can get lost in the passion of sex. The connection can make him emotional. He fucks with everything he has, so the experience can be really intense and long-lasting. Only those who are lucky get to witness this. 

E ⇥ Experience

  Has limited experience with dating and sex. Isn’t a virgin. His body has definitely been used for no-strings-attached sex before, but he prefers something that creates more of a bond, which he hasn’t had yet. He does know how to make someone feel good. He’s very good at everything he sets out to do.

F ⇥ Favorite position

  Raw sex where he’s laying on top, with his chest touching yours. He wants your legs wrapped around his waist as he’s deep inside of you. Really enjoys having you ride him while he’s sitting up and leaning against something.

G⇥  Goofy

  Sex with him has to be fun for everyone involved. If he can’t talk during, or if he can’t be honest in the way he expresses himself, he’s not that interested. For this reason, he likes his partners to be just as expressive and fun.

H ⇥ Hair

  He likes grooming his own hair when he’s just on his own. Hair isn’t that big of a deal, but he definitely prefers for it not to be there. On you, he would like it if he could see you better. But, having hair is something he can work with. 

I ⇥ Intimacy

  As much as he likes things honest and raw, he does struggle with being truly intimate when the relationship feels like it’s moving to the next step. He can be romantic and do all of the things he sees in movies, or do things he thinks people want, but there is something about being in the moment enough to transform him, that scares him a little. If you give, he pulls back a little.

J ⇥ Jack Off

  He knows exactly what he likes when it comes to his own body. Learned how to edge himself and will do that often just to make things more interesting. Makes a lot of masturbation jokes around his friends, but never around you.

K ⇥ Kink

  His biggest kink is having sex with multiple people at once. There is something free about adding to the group. He can create a nice environment, where it doesn’t have to mean anything, but it can still make him feel connected with a lot of minds. If they aren’t participating, he’d like it if they watched him. 

L ⇥ Location

  He would like having oral in a car, or getting a hand job somewhere he shouldn’t be. For anything more than that, in the comforts of home is where it would stay. 

M ⇥ Motivation

  He is turned on by your emotions. If he’s picking up on your arousal, he immediately starts to feel it for himself.  He’s very alert and aware of what you want, and he’d be determined to give it to you right. He’s also turned on by the most random things (inanimate objects, like seeing a sex toy).

N ⇥ No

  He is turned off by someone uninteresting. He doesn’t want normal. He wants to be captivated. He wants you to turn to him and tell him you would absolutely let him do whatever he wants to you. He wants someone to be okay with him being as deep or as shallow as he wants. He’s also turned off by people without any direction of their own. He needs to be impressed.

O ⇥ Oral

  Definitely eats ass. Has no problem with oral at all. Has high standards when it comes to himself, though. Wants you to mimic the way he makes himself feel good, but he’s open to trying new things (after bitching about it first). Loves for his balls to be played with.

P ⇥ Pace

  Everything is done at his own pace, or at yours. Nothing too fast or nothing that ends too quickly. If he has the time, he’s going to draw the sex out. 

Q ⇥ Quickie

  An oral quickie is more ideal. He’s not going to turn down sex, but he’ll spend more time teasing you and asking you why you want to fuck than actually fucking you.

R ⇥ Risk

  He likes risk, in theory, but it has to be worth it. Since he knows what he wants, he can figure out if the reward is right for him.

S ⇥ Stamina

  He likes sex enough. He is full of stamina in the beginning. His energy is very high during foreplay and before making you come the first time. After that, it starts slipping away. 

T ⇥ Toy

  He would try any toy as long as he can figure out what it does at first glance. There are times when he wouldn’t want to use any toys in the bedroom. It has to be the right mood. 

U ⇥ Unfair  

  He’s good at teasing you vocally. His attitude, if you can handle it, makes the atmosphere fun. He’s also the type to physically remove his cock if he feels you’re not giving him enough in return.

V ⇥ Volume

  He’s not as loud as he seems. He wants to yell, but he worries about how the sound would carry. He keeps things more quiet and breath-y. 

W ⇥ Wild Card

  His attention won’t be on the people standing in the room watching, but yours will be. Ten will crook his finger underneath your chin to make sure you’re paying attention to him. “Watch me,” he’ll say. “Watch me split you open.” Ten’s cock will drive into you, removing any thought of the multiple eyes on your body. Occasionally, you’ll see a strangers hand stroke Ten’s hairless chest, but you’ll ignore it. Ten will flip you over and take you from behind, his cock knowing all of your sweet spots. How slow. How fast. How much to take away if you’re not moaning enough. He’ll twist you into many positions, holding and hugging your body until you’re both dripping sweat. “How does it feel?” he’ll ask. You’ll mutter that it’s good, but the words will barely escape your mouth before you come, your body shaking in his arms.

X ⇥ X-Ray

  He’s not that big, but he’s certainly thicker than average. Groomed really well, and I wouldn’t be surprised if he had a tattoo near his dick.

Y ⇥ Yearning

  His sex-drive is less than average. I don’t think he needs it to survive. As much as he enjoys sex, I think he would only fuck once a week.

Z ⇥ ZZZZ

  Doesn’t fall asleep quickly after sex. Lays there on his phone, or is into having deep conversations until you fall asleep.

[nautiscarader]

One more stocking next year - pregnancy/impregnation Hiccstrid. Astrid wants to give Hiccup a memmorable snoggletog gift. They fuck on furs by the fire all night long. Astrid wants to make absolutely sure it works so she times her getting filled with the rising solstice sun for the gods blessing.

(okay, so first of all, i LOVED that detailed and well-thought prompt, this is how you ensure yourself a spot in my heart. I had to make one tiny change to make it better with the idea of polar night during Snoggletog, though. Also ages might be wonky given the canon, but w/e)

(Ao3)

Also, if you enjoyed my work, here's Ko-fi link if you'd be so kind ❤️ .

==============

Never before has Astrid been that nervous during the Snoggletog day. true, this day was usually hectic, filled with preparations and last-minute shopping, but this year was different. This was their first Snoggletog on New Berk. First Snoggletog without dragons. And first Snoggletog as a wife.

The past few months she helped Hiccup preparing the Vikings for the winter in new place. Finding new sources of food, gathering supplies, mapping the territory. And now, on top of it was the celebration itself, draining the time from the ever shorter days, as their land approached the short two weeks of never-ending night.

Sitting by the table, amongst her and Hiccup's family, Astrid nervously looked in the window, at the last rays of the setting Sun, hoping her nervousness wasn't too noticeable. But she was wrong, as Hiccup's keen eye quickly spotted her behaviour and reached his hand to hold hers, noticing she hasn't touched the dish she helped preparing.

- Is something wrong? - he whispered, leaning towards her, while his mother sang with Gobber - No, no.. - Astrid smiled - I just wished we were alone already... This day was so... exhausting.

Hiccup looked into her tired eyes, and after a moment of thinking kissed her on the cheek.

- I hope you are ready for one last act. - The what?

Hiccup sat back in his chair, reached for a bottle of mead, and when everyone else were staring at the singing couple, he pretended to pour himself a cup. The peaceful musical moment was shattered with the cup that tumbled to the ground, as Hiccup began moving erratically in his chair.

- Oh, oh dear! - he babbled - It seems we might have brewed a bit too strong mead this year.

He winked at Astrid.

- Aye, yes, you are right, my husband. - she acted best to her abilities. - I don't think I can stand on my leg! If only there was someone strong that could help me walk to my bed! - Don't worry, lad, I'll carry ya!

Hiccup stopped wobbling at once when Gobber reached towards him.

- Between you and we we have two working legs, so we'll be there lickety split.

Astrid pierced him with a stern gaze.

- Er, don't you think tat tis should be Aye, his betrothed wife to carry him, and, er... scold him for clouding his mind too much? - Ar, ye might be right. Just wanted to help, that's all. - So, that's settled then, we are so sorry we cannot stay longer, but...

The two exchanged knowing looks.

- I have to make him a nice cup of yak nog!

This time, Hiccup didn't have to pretend to lose his balance.

- Yes, right, that should do it...

Five minutes later, Hoccup and Astrid were laughing as they waddled through the thick snow away from the chieftain's hall back to their hut, and just before they entered, Hiccup ceremoniously grabbed Astrid and carried her through the door, much to her enjoyment.

- Okay, first emergency exit from family meeting as a new chief. I don't think it was that bad. - It was. It was horrible. - Astrid kissed him - But we don't have to worry about it. - Astrid, go to bed, I'm gonna make you some tea, maybe? - Hiccup took her coat - That should calm your nerves. And I will do stuff around the house...

But as he undid his coat, Astrid's arms closed around his neck, just as her lips met with his in a long, fiery kiss that truly made him feel drunk.

- Actually, I wasn't feeling tired... - she looked into their living room, illuminated by just a dash of light from outside. - I was hurrying up to.. to give you my gift. - Oh, milady, you don't have to do this today, you can wait till tomorrow- - No, no I can't. - she said sharply.

She pressed her lips against his again and walked into the room, leading Hiccup with her. And with each step, her fingers undid one layer of his clothes, and when his hands reached her waist, she let out a prolonged moan, happy that he was on with her plan.

- Here? - Mhm. - she murmured, kissing his jawline.

His ceremonial clothes felt to the floor, and so did hers, tied with dozens of knots and strings.

- We have all night... - No, no we don't. - she repeated, making Hiccup raise his eyebrows. - Okay, time out. Is there something I don't know about? - Hiccup...

She leaned against him, still undoing her clothes.

- Today is the last day of the Sun.

With her other hand she grabbed a piece of wood and threw it into the fireplace. Hiccup at once readied his fiery sword and ignited it, filling the room with pleasant warmth and light.

- Hiccup, I did some calculations, and it's today. Today is the best day for me to... give you your present.

She took his hand and placed it above her sex, just as he was about to undo the bindings there. But then, he looked at her, and noticed the fire in her eyes, burning so much brighter than any reflection of real one would.

- Astrid...! - Don't you want it? Gods would approve, it's a perfect... perfect moment...

She turned around again, hoping to see the light between the thick wall of trees that surrounded their house.

- Well, if so, then we are losing time, milady.

Astrid yelped again when Hiccup took her and lay her on the thick, fluffy furs, one of the few new spoils of hunts on the New Berk. He didn't bother with the last bindings of her corset, and went straight for her delicate panties, kissing her thick thighs, so ideal for the gift she wanted to give him.

- Hic-Hiccup, maybe-maybe don't... - I am not going to leave my lady unsatisfied. - he replied sternly, continuing his foreplay. - Oh, Hiccup...

Astrid threw her head back and let his subtle kisses coat her wet, overflowing sex. She straight out cried his name when his tongue dipped between her folds, revealing how wet she really was.

- I think you did your math right. - he kissed her folds - It's a good thing I didn't drink at all... - Hiccup, don't-don't let me wait... I want to do it all night, but the first... The first one has to be now!

Her husband slid onto her, and as soon as their lips met, her legs locked behind his back, as if her life depended on it. She moaned when his tip parted her soaking folds, and with his first thrust, she arched her back, aligning her sex to better suit their animalistic needs. a moment later she felt something underneath her back, and realised that their clothes, bundled together would serve as a makeshift pillow, shaping her body into an ideal position for her carnal desire.

But even then, Hiccup took it a bit further. He grabbed her legs and threw it on his shoulders, just so he could sink an inch  or two deeper inside her, an action Astrid welcomed with an unbridled "Yes!". her legs locked behind his neck this time, together with her hands, and in the intimate, tight position, the two began rocking their bodies, running against the time and Sun itself.

Every few seconds Astrid looked to her right, at the small window, and to her left to see shadows of the tree getting longer and longer, trying to find the right moment when they would disappear. but it was easier said than done, as with their biological needs came also the frivolous ones, when Hiccup sneaked his hand between their bodies just to stimulate her swollen num above her entrance.

Astrid lost her mind, kicking and scaring his shoulders, as they drew closer and closer to hers and his fulfilment. The two often finished at different moments, but this one? It had to be simultaneous, Astrid decided, there was no other way.

Astrid moaned, nervously shifting her stare between her husband and the frosted window, trying to postpone his release, despite her body demanding the pleasure that has been building up in her loins. Her needy, quickened, ragged breath coincided with his grunts, and only when she lost track of the Sun that hid behind the horizon, she dug her nails into Hiccup's neck and screamed her plea.

- N-Now! give me your seed! All-all of it!

Never to disappoint his lady, Hiccup gladly fulfilled her plea. He let out a prolonged, deep groan as his hips smashed against hers one final time, and he finally let go, flooding Astrid's fertile womb with streams of his seed, while her body arched under the pleasure that shook her body. Hiccup collapsed on top of her bosom, quickly trying to find her lips, while his body, twisted with hers, continued the sacred ritual they've been preparing for, sending more and more life-giving fluids inside her thirsty body.

Long minutes have passed, as their bodies shook together, and when the two opened their eyes, all they could see in the dimly lit room was the fire's reflections, dancing in their eyes. Hiccup was sure that Astrid cheeks have never look more flustered, the combination of heat from the fire, sultry atmosphere, and an even sultier passion that connected their bodies.

- Do you think it worked? - Hiccup sneaked a kiss between her breasts, knowing well that Astrid would jitter when he brushed a particularly sensitive spot - It better did. Otherwise I will be really pissed at the gods.

She cupped his face and pressed his head against her chest, still rising up and down, desperate for air she expelled when she cried his name.

- But still, I wasn't joking, Hiccup. - she suddenly added, catching his attention - I meant it when I said I want to make love all night.

He blinked.

- Not until the Sun rises again...

Hiccup's eyes opened wide just as he was about to kiss her breasts again, as the meaning of her words finally dawned on him.

- But... it's gonna be two weeks, maybe even fifteen days until... - I know. - Astrid cupped his face and tightened her grip on him - We've been gathering the supplies, and for the next two weeks, we're not gonna leave the house. And you...

She crossed her legs, locking them tightly behind his back, bringing his face inches away from hers.

- You're not gonna leave me.

To prove her point, she gave him a gentle kick to his butt, and with that, he started advancing again, seemingly delving deeper with each trust even though she thought he has reached his limit already, just to ensure he would plant his seed as close to her womb as possible. And though he already filled her once, he was more than happy to do it again.

As it turned out, Astrid really wasn't joking about her plan. Though the two did leave the house, of course - perhaps just to watch the northern lights against the dark sky of the short polar night - she was relentless with milking Hiccup of the chief's seed at least twice a day, ensuring that not a drop of his cum would be wasted, though she sometimes had to use her fingers to clean up after a particularly messy finish that overflowed her sex. Still, she was his wife, so it belonged to her, even if she has to preserve it in her belly...

Astrid never before believed what her mother or Valka told about women's instincts, until she awoken two weeks later to the first rays of newly reborn Sun. She felt ill, was sweaty, hot, though instead of her forehead burning, sudden warmth radiated from within her core that just a few hours earlier has been once more overfilled by Hiccup's virility. And when she placed her hand over it, she knew it has happened. She wouldn't even have to ask Gothi for her wheat seeds that she'd have to pee on to see if they'd sprout. She just... knew.

She turned to her husband, sleeping after another tiring session and though she was eager to tell him the news, she just closed her arms around him, sneaking a kiss to his cheek. And when he turned and closed his arm over her belly, he knew it too.

===========

Also, that “peeing on wheat seeds was a surprisingly reliable pregnancy test. 

[odetolove]

a-ahh, fuck, baby—

he’s very, very tempted to just push your panties aside and fuck you right here in the hall, but he quickly shoves the thought away; you deserve to be comfortable, he reasons.

shit, jax, w-want you so fuckin’ bad...

it didn’t occur to him that in order for you to get to his room, he has to let go of you. this is not ideal. you’re shaking in his grip, pressed against him so sweetly. it’s painful to even imagine parting from you.

c-c’mere, baby, let’s go. can’t w-wait anymore.

he effortlessly lifts you into his arms, giggling a little and wrapping your legs around his waist. his cute laugh is cut off by a groan at the feeling of your cunt against him. he carries you back to his room, pressing you into his bed and folding you in half immediately.

so fuckin’ pretty, baby, look at how sweet you are underneath me...

a wave of nervousness hits him suddenly at the sight of you squirming and whining for him. he’s definitely not the most experienced, and he really doesn’t know if what’s he’s saying is even the right stuff— but you seem to like it, right?

you could get whiplash at how quickly his demeanor flips back and forth between so possessive and dominant to so shy and needy. he gazes down at you with big puppy eyes.

wanna t-taste you. can i, p-please?

— koutarou 🧸

my whole body shakes- unable to keep up with the way he’s quickly folded me down, legs dangling over his arms, sucking in breath after quickened breath with the thought of him actually fucking me like this.

his praise and compliments have me squirm even harder- blinking up at him, hands gripping the bulging muscle of his arm. i can see the uneasy sway of emotions, my hand moves to cup his face, trying to snap him out of whatever insecurity that’s plaguing him, giggling at the sweetness in which he asks me, nodding as i look into his golden eyes-

yeah, you can taste me- i’m all yours kou, i’m all yours okay?

i try and reassure him, trying to calm my own breathing, as excited as i am and as absolutely horny as i was, the need to make sure he was okay and comfortable overweighted anything- knowing how much in his own head he could get.

i know you’ll make me feel good bo- you’re amazing, you’ll make me feel so so good...

[burnedbyshoto]

Ashido Mina

a/n: so, here’s to the start of my event! sfw is above the cut, nsfw is below it! I’m having a lot of fun with these and I hope you all enjoy :D

SFW

A = Affection (How affectionate are they with a s/o?)

Super affectionate with you. You need a hug, a kiss??? Mina will provide everything needed

B = Breath (What could their s/o do to take their breath away?)

Come out of nowhere and hug her from behind, or plan something super romantic and spontaneous, she’s such a romantic that the more cliche the better

C = Cuddling (Do they cuddle? If they do, how and when do they cuddle?)

Mina loves being the big spoon because she loves to bury her nose into your hair. She will cuddle with you whenever you please honesty

D = Dream (What do they dream of doing with their s/o?)

She wants nothing more than to win a dancing competition with you, or at the very least join one with you

E = Effort (How much effort do they put into a relationship?)

A lot of effort, she’s the type to date intending on marrying who she’s marrying so, you better treat her right

F = Fear (What do they do if their s/o is scared? How do they handle it?)

She will get a big blanket and roll you up and just hold you, you’re a burrito baby now

G = Gifts (What type of gifts do they give their s/o? Do they want a gift in return?)

she is the type to give you over the top things. think of jim’s present to pam during christmas before they got together… yeah, pretty intimate and intense but something you’ll love.

mina loves a gift in return and she especially loves gifts where she gets to do thinking’s with you!

H = Hugs (Do they hug their s/o? How often?)

hugging all the time!!! she loves touching you!!!

I = Intimacy (How romantic are they? Do they have problems with intimacy?)

a total romantic, everything she does for you is done with hearts in her eyes, and she has no issues with prodcasting such love

J = Jealous (Do they get jealous? How do they act when jealous?)

while not one too typical to get jealous because she trusts in you, when she gets jealous know she gets touchy. like stand behind you with her mouth to your neck touchy.

K = Kiss (Are they a good kisser? Do they like to kiss? How often do they try to kiss you?)

minas kisses are super gentle and sweet, she’s not the best kisser but she’s so passionate about it that you forget. if you go a day without getting at least ten kisses from mina, something’s wrong

L = Love (When do they say they love you? How often do they say it? Do they prefer to say or show it?)

mina doesn’t know what to do when she figures out she loves you. it’s something she’s always imagined feeling but now that it’s real she can only gape like a fish. she’ll accidentally blurt it out before her 10 step plan to confess happens. she prefers to show it then say it.

M = Marriage (Do they want to get married? If so, what kind of ceremony?)

she wants a full out reception party. she wants the biggest dance floor and the two of you to perform 194930 dances together.

N = Night out (What type of dates do they like to go on? How often do they like to go on them?)

mina actually treasures dates where the two of you stay in! the both of you lead busy outside lives that intimate ones indoors resonate deeper within her heart

O = Out of the Ordinary (What’s something they don’t normally do with/for their s/o?)

there’s not much she wouldn’t do for you, but on the rarest of occasions she’ll let you touch her horns.

P =Playful (Are they playful in a relationship? If so, how do they play around/mess with their s/o?)

super playful relationship! playing nerd gun fights in pjs at two in the morning! laughter is always echoing in the hallways with you two

Q = Questions (Do they ask their s/o their opinion on things? Do they share theirs?)

she’ll always ask for opinions on things she’s unsure of and will ALWAYS give her own thoughts about it

R = Random (How spontaneous is their relationship? Do they do things on the spot or plan ahead?)

she is a very big on the spot person! not that she doesn’t plan things out, just successwise she has better on the spot events

S = Sleep (How do they sleep with their s/o?)

the two of you nap together more, especially during high school because you both are too nervous at getting caught in the others room overnight!

T = Trust (How much do they trust their s/o?)

trusts you completely. if she didn’t trust you, she wouldn’t have ever asked you out

U = Unique (What makes them unique as a s/o?)

how deeply she loves. your hobbies will become her hobbies. it doesn’t matter because mina loves dancing and you do it with her, so you best believe she will do whatever hobby you love the most!

V = Vulnerable (How long until they can be vulnerable around their s/o? What are they like in this state?)

being vulnerable with you is super hard for mina because she’s always just so hyper and cheery, that the first time she’s vulnerable it makes you worry because it’s super super scary to see her sad and horns wilting as if in response. it takes about three months for her to show you this side.

W = Wild Card (Get a random domestic headcanon of the character of your choice)

mina loves comparing her hand size with you. whether they’re bigger or smaller than hers, she’s just fascinated by your hands she can’t help but stare and compare.

X = X-Ray (What would they do if their s/o got injured?)

suddenly number 18 in the class is outperforming number 1 in the class. she becomes instant health genius as she does anything to make you feel better

“mina is just a paper cut!”

“if we make it a slightly deeper cut you won’t feel the stinging pain anymore!”

Y = Yuck (Do they have any pet peeves about their s/o? Are there any habits that might bother their s/o?)

constant negativity. like the yucky kind that drains the fun from everything. she hates that in a s/o so much. like there’s a difference between that and being a pessimist and she sees and understands that.

Z = Zeal (Are they passionate as a s/o? Do they want or like passion?)

she wants and LIKES THE PASSION OKAY?! give mina her ideal love 2k19

NSFW:

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)

Mina lays there breathing for a full 5 minutes

She is always overwhelmed post sex, just give her a minute

While not the best at cleaning up, she lowkey loves just laying in your guys mess, she will always cuddle and hold you.

Lots of pillow talk

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

On herself, mina prides herself on her arms and legs, she’s extremely proud of her natural strength

Mina is a useless boobs gal. 

dangle them in her fucking face p U H L E A S E

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)

Mina fucking loves it when she can get herself to squirt

Like one you guys figure out how to make her squirt it’s going to happen every time y’all fuck cuz it sorta reminds her of her quirk

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Has definitely masturbated to an innocuous picture of you when the two of you went months without seeing each other

never masturbated until the two of you got together tbh

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

Is not experienced at all prior to you! Mina is a romantic with a terrible streak prior to you, but she is a fluid person so she nails everything in the bed fast

F = Favorite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual)

Favorite position is kneeling. She gets to hold you tight and full access to your boobs.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

Definitely, the lover who goes from super romantic and intimate sex to can barely take this seriously love making

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

Always groomed. The second she knew she was gonna fuck you she got that shit waxed. She has a heart strip though, and yes, her pubes are curly and pink

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…) 

Sex with mina is very very intimate, even if its in a joking matter. She truly cherishes everything about you and will always try making your sex life as amazing as possible

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

Loves masturbating together. Like loves it so much. She loves watching you please yourself while she… ahem… assists you with some toys

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Hair-pulling: she loves having her hair pulled and the feeling of fingers knotting into her curls, degradation: she loves calling you impolite names because of the way you react, roleplaying: LOVES DRESSING UP AND CREATING A NEW PERSONALITY OKAY

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

By far her most favorite place to have sex is in the backseat of a car. It’s risky and hot. She’s addicted.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

Physical reactions. Moan for her, move your body and praise what shes doing for you. Also when you wear that one big t-shirt with your hottest lingerie underneath and give her a lap dance

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

DO NOT TOUCH HER HORNS. THE MOMENT THEY ARE TOUCHED SHE’S DONE

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Loves giving more. Only on special occasions does she like having the attention on her, but for the most part, she will spoil you

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

All depends on her mood! She genuinely loves going fast and rough, but on anniversary nights, she enjoys slow and sensual paces

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

Is definitely down to have a quickie, she thinks it’s hot, but only once every 2 years. She just enjoys being able to hear you scream as loudly as she can make you scream.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

Very experimental! The two of you have designated days for trying out new things just because you’re never too sure

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…)

Mina actually comes really fast, it’s a big reason as to why she prefers focusing on you! But she has good stamina and can last to three full and kinky rounds.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

Toys are a must.

Vibrators, dildos, strap on, anal beads.

You think of one, you two own it.

They are very used and will go interchangeably, but are more often used on you

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Not that big of a tease actually. Like she may abuse vibrator rights, but it’s not in a teasing way! More like a “i’m trying to make you squirt” way

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

She’s very loud in bed!

Moaning, whining, mewling, and sometimes even begging

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

The first time the two of you had sex, mina came twice in under two minutes. Once because of how your breasts felt rubbing against hers and when you pressed your soaked cunt against her own

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those shirts and pants, picture or words)

Mina is a blessed girl with round perky breasts, probably a dd-cup. her right one is actually bigger surprisingly! And she has inverted nipples. She has larger than average labia

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

Went from sorta there to we fuck at minimum five times a week.

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Takes her forever to fall asleep, will be awake long after you pass out

[bluejaytaco]

Yet again DND with Jay

(Another long one, folks. In our campaign, we have something we call a “Daiquiri Night.” It’s used for when too many people can’t be there or in situations where people are too preoccupied to do anything deep and plot-heavy. It’s pretty much a filler episode where we’re free to fuck around with very little consequences and, towards the end, the DM throws in small plot hints so it’s not a complete bust. It’s good for character development and getting the party a little closer.

Last session, we all drank and were expecting such an session. What we got was heavy plot stuff and horrible consequences. Also, so far most of the Daiquiri Nights are run by Ticket Master; being the only god who follows us so closely.)

Ticket Master: (Stopping Hennessy B from killing us and dropping Alabaster back into our party) Alright, so! Who wants to die right now?

Everyone: .....

Ticket Master: No one? Great! Now, who wants to go on a fun-filled adventure?

Everyone:...

Art: (slowly raises his hand)

Koejin: (Pushes Art’s hand back down) No....

Ticket Master, ignoring Koejin: Everyone? Great! Let’s go.

-

(We get pulled into a world that is just one giant Carnival. After giving our tickets over to Ticket Master, We all enter and start to go our own separate ways. This is where things become very character plot heavy.)

Koejin: (climbs the Ferris Wheel to see if she can see anyway out)

People on the car she’s standing on: (her parents, who keep screaming about being abandoned and how she let them die.)

DM: You see the parking lot you walked through to get here and then, far beyond that, you see mist. Above you is the portal you came through; it’s still open.

Koejin, nodding: Alright, I’m gonna head back down

Koejin’s parents: (riding on the car she’s standing on top of) You left us! You took another woman as your mother! You can never be forgiven!

Koejin: (jumps down once she’s at ground level) I didn’t abandon you. You died and I was five.

Ticket Master: (pointing at the now faded parents) Yeah! She was five! See? I backed you up.

Koejin gave him a little pat on the shoulder and nearly lost an arm for it. She then heads over to the bar to drink her face off.

-

Theodora, on the bumper cars: (Getting blamed for the deaths of her soldiers. She bumps cars with a young, fifteen year old Koejin.)

Young Koejin: Ugh, what are you doing here? 

Theodora:...I....

Young Koejin: You should just leave! No one wants you here; you’re ruining everyone’s fun!

Koejin: (In the bar, drinking real alcohol and being served by a bartender that’s not Ticket Master. In other words, having a good time. A Ticket Master portal opens by her head to show her what’s going on by Theodora.).... (Pulls out her bow and arrow and aims for Young Koejin’s head.)

DM: I want you to think about what you’re doing here. You’re about to shoot young you in front of Theodora. (Sidenote: DM also implemented a “sanity meter” for us. Anytime we see something fucked up or extremely jarring, we become a little more insane.)

Koejin’s player: I know. I’m still doing it.

Koejin shoots Young Koejin right in the head and Theodora has to roll a Wisdom saving throw. Luckily, she rolled a 19.

DM: So, Theodora. You don’t see it as young Koejin dying in front of you. You see it for what it is; Koejin apologizing.

Koejin, from inside the bar: I was an asshole. Come drink with me.

(Theodora goes through the portal to join Koejin in the bar.)

-

Hennessy, at the balloon shoot: (All the faces look like his team mates, He sits in front of Theodora’s.)

Vincent (Hennessy’s fiance), sits down at the Hennessy head: I bet you I can get mine to pop before you.

Hennessy, immediately suspicious: Alright, what do you wager? (Rolls perception to find out for sure he isn’t Vincent. His suspicions are confirmed.)

Vincent: Well, if you win, you and Vincent live happily ever after and he never has to work again. If I win, you fall out of love with him.

Hennessy: No deal.

Vincent:... Well, how about just the ring then? He can always make you another one.

Hennessy, noticeably more hesitant:...Still no.

(A Ticket Master portal opens to show Vincent slaving away at his work for Mrs. Red. His pain has him in tears but he continues on.)

Fake Vincent: You would really not save him from this pain?

Hennessy: (just starts playing the game and shoots water into Theodora’s mouth. The portal shifts over to the bar.)

Theodora, in the bar: (takes a shot and it shoots right out of her mouth. Her stomach starts to bloat and she starts to spit up water.)

Hennessy: (Immediately stops)

Vincent: (stands up) you know, Hennessy, you can be a catty bitch. (walks away)

Hennessy: (watches him)....and don’t you forget it. (Goes through the portal into the bar.)

Meanwhile, at the bar

Ticket Master, sitting on the bar: (Watching as Theodora keels over) If only there was someone who could destroy that water, you’d be fine! ((Another running gag in the campaign; Alabaster casting Create or Destroy Water more than any other move.))

-

Wreybar, over at the Test your Strength

Wreybar: (Picks up the mallet)

(Her father’s head appears on the target as she swings down.)

DM: You still have the chance to stop.

Wreybar’s Player: ... I’m gonna follow through.

DM:...What, really? Shit, didn’t expect that! So, you smash in your father’s head. Blood, bone and grey matter fly everywhere. Then, you’re entire family comes running out cheering and screaming “Wreybar! you killed us! Yay!”

Wreybar: (starts crying) I’m sorry!

DM: As you see everyone praising and cheering you, you notice something weird. There is one person not doing that. It’s your brother.

Wreybar:(goes up to him)

Wreybar’s brother: Wreybar.... what’s going on? (Unlike everyone else, he seems real)

((I was drinking so this particular convo gets a little foggy. But it ends with someone killing Wreybar’s brother (Almost positive it was Ticket Master) and the DM pulling her aside to discuss something in private. I’m typically the one who keeps track of the story so I hope Wreybar remembers this part well enough. If not, its our DM’s job to remind her anyways.))

-

Art, At the Fortune Teller (Koejin’s player: Of course you would go there!)

DM: You step in to see a robotic person who is a very racist stereotype. He’s dark skinned, wearing a turban, talking in a thick accent and saying, in a broken robotic voice “I aM a Raacis-t dePICtion! Wo-ould you like your FoRTune?!”

Art: Uhhhh, wow. This was not at all what I was expecting... Uh, is there a way out of here?

Fortune Teller: A W-ay OuT? Whaat evR do you Me-aaN?

Art:....Nevermind. Can you just... not do this? Turn into someone else.

Fortune Teller: Wh-o would you LYKe?

Art: Literally anyone else would be better.

Fortune Teller: (Turns into Alabaster) Bet-ter?

Art:... Yeah, I can work with this.

Fortune Teller Alabaster: S-oo... WouLD you lYKe your Fooort-une?

Art: Sure. Uh.... what’s my future look like?

Fortune Teller Alabaster: BLEAK!

Art: Sounds about right.

Fortune Teller Alabaster: (Morphs into Hennessy. All robotic jerking is gone.) Now, how about we talk about why you’re a piece of shit?

Art: ...And that sounds like something you’d say to me.

FT Hennessy: And it’s true; you are a piece of shit. My hubby says you abandoned your sister and I’m inclined to believe him over your lyin’ ass.

Art: Okay no. Hennessy’s the smartest one out of all of us. I know for a fact he has enough sense to not follow Vincent blindly and think I actually meant to abandon my sister.

(A Ticket Master portal appeared in the bar near Hennessy. He tunes in just in time to hear Art speak.)

Hennessy: .... (reaches through the portal and smacks the Fake Hennessy in the face. It melts away to reveal Ticket Master underneath.) You’re right, Art. I am the smartest person here. And I’m smart enough to know you have a lot of problems; abandonment is not one of ‘em.

Art: ...Alright. I guess.... you’re not so bad.

Ticket Master: (Hand on his cheek) Hennessy just slapped me.... what an honor! (Hearts appear around him)

Art, noticing this: Okay, that’s not at all concerning.... (Goes through the portal and into the bar with everyone else.)

-

Alabaster over by the Carousel  (Everyone to the DM: You better not fucking hurt him, I swear to god. ((We are all a part of the Alabaster Protection Squad.)))

Alabaster: (Sees his family near one side, his old friend on another, and Eris (the daughter he recently adopted) on a third. Sidenote: Eris was his old friend’s and General Blue’s daughter. Blue left her to Alabaster, but we ended up killing her long before knowing about Eris.).... (Sits by his family being that he hasn’t seen them in 400 years)

Blue: So, you’re gonna completely ignore my daughter? Maybe I shouldn’t have trusted you with her. Maybe I should just kill her now and put her out of her misery now. 

Alabaster: There is no need to resort to....

Blue: (Goes to Eris)

Alabaster: (immediately dives for Eris)

(Ticket Master Portal appears in the bar next to Theodora. She doesn’t see it until Wreybar points it out to her. This turns into a fight for everyone to keep Blue away from Alabaster and Eris, which everyone learned was just a heated water baby.)

Alabaster: (casts blindness on Blue)

Art: (Reaches in for Alabaster)

Alabaster, to Blue: You’re sight will return momentarily. And I promise you, Eris will be well taken care of. There is no need to worry.

DM: Alabaster, Art; you two look at each other and remember the first time you met, back in that pit where Thia saved you. You think about how much you’ve been through together and start to feel a little more at peace. Both of you roll a 20. If it turns out you somehow get the same number, your sanity will be at -20 (The scale goes from -20 to 20. Negatives are more sane.)

(Alabaster and Art rolled an 18 and a 17 respectively. The numbers were so close, the DM gave us both a point for sanity.)

-

DM: So, you guys are at the bar, having a grand old time. The bartender, for each of you, looks like you’re ideal sexual partner.

Koejin’s Player: (laugh) does that mean Art’s is just Ticket Master?

Me:..... yeaaahhhhhhh.....

DM, looks at Alabaster’s player knowingly: And what’s Alabaster’s?

Alabaster’s Player: A giraffe with Jeff Goldblum’s head.

Everyone: (laughing)

Me: Can anyone else see that? Cuz Art might be judging his best friend if he can.

DM: Nope, you can only see your own. But you guys are having a good time. Alabaster and Wreybar are understanding they both have a similar history and have been through a lot of the same issues. That starts to bring them closer. Hennessy and Art; you two now understand there is more to one another that you didn’t know before. You feel as though you’re coming to terms with one another. And, Theodora and Koejin. The two of you understand now that the past should be left in the past. There is a lot to work on, but you’re on the right track.

....(Personally, I think this would have been the perfect time for Ticket Master to send us back and let that be the end of the session. We were all closer than before and all that.... but the DM had a different plan.)

DM: The bartender shifts from your ideal partners to Ticket Master... So, he stays the same for Art.

Ticket Master: Well, now that you’re all closer, I’d say this is a time well spent. Now, here’s something you can do for me. (He slides a blank piece of paper in front of everyone.) When you’re ready, all you need to do is sign the bottom. No rush.

Art: (Sees the actual contract and decides to keep it to himself.)

Theodora: (Takes out a cigar that Ticket Master gave her and hands it back to him.) Here, so you’ll have a last smoke (she throws the contract back) when I kill you.

Ticket Master, frowning(A rare occurrence):... you shouldn’t have done that.

Me: Oh shit...

Koejin’s Player: Byyyeee Theodora....

Alabaster’s Player: (covering his mouth) nononono

Ticket Master: (his face opens up to reveal unspeakable horrors. Tentacles move out to grab for Theodora and drive her to complete insanity.)

Wreybar: (Moves in the way to share some of the insanity. Both are now insane, but Theodora is at least able to function.)

Alabaster: (Casts create or destroy water over them. I think the purpose was to get Ticket Master away from them. Don’t remember; was pretty drunk.)

DM: Oh god... shit! No...(Sigh) well, I need to follow my own rules... As the water comes down, you see a giant minotaur come from the ground behind Ticket Master. It’s Shmoogie. Ticket Master stops what he’s doing but, before he can say anything beyond “you don’t-”, Shmoogie grabs him and tears him apart. In Shmoogie’s hand, you see Ticket Master’s face. He’s saying “You have no idea what you’ve done!” Then, Shmoogie crushes it.

Shmoogie: You’ve all done well. We will deal with him now; no need to worry.

Skelly, at Shmoogie’s side: Yeah, we did good!

Theodora: Skelly! How do you know our buddy, Shmoogie?

Skelly: Well, I like sand. And I don’t have any memories, but would really like to have some so.... God of Sand and Memories.

(Shmoogie then disappears back into wherever he came from.)

Koejin: Well, good work team! No more Ticket Master.

Art, who isn’t the happiest about this turn of events:.... but now we’re stuck here.

Koejin: That sounds like a problem for Next week Koejin!

(And this is where we left off. I have conflicted feelings about this situation. Art is.... a little less conflicted than me....)

DM: Oh shit! I almost forgot!... you guys are sitting around, thinking about everything that just happened and, suddenly.... Art dabs.

Art:.... (hating his life and his creator)

Theodora: Art..... you’re so dated.....

(Context: Me and the DM are close. So close that we have a tendency to argue about anything and everything. This doesn’t work when I’m a player in his campaign. Which means, he decided that, inspired by a miniature I just bought, any time I say no to something DND related, Art has to dab. It’s a stupid little thing, but a thing nevertheless.)

[likeshipsonthesea]

okay so legit one of my first-ever nurseydex posts was this one right here and while i still agree with/hc parts of it i have to admit it’s a bit outdated for how i see nurseydex’s relationship now so i thought why not make a new “why i ship nurseydex” post three years later to explain my own rambling understanding of them??

so, anywho. imagine a dex-- back when he was just will-- growing up with this huge weight of expectation around him, about every aspect of his life-- expectation of what a man ought to be, expectation of what a student ought to be, a worker, a son, etc-- and despite what he wants and feels, striving to meet/exceed this expectation to satisfy his parents and make them proud and be who they want him to be. like, following his ma around when she does chores might be fun and helpful, but a man is supposed to be doing the dirty, heavy work, no baking or doing laundry (at least that’s what his brother says) and from the time he’s little he knows that college means money and they don’t have that, but education is also very important and college is how he gets a better life for him and his family, and so from elementary school he’s studying his spelling words and times tables and striving to be the best student he can be because scholarships and respect and expectation. and yeah, maybe there’s other expectations, around who he can and cannot like, and maybe that doesn’t always fit the way he thinks it’s supposed to, and he allows himself little indulgences knowing one day that he will do what is expected of him and make his parents happy, and the crushing weight of that-- of knowing what the future will force him into-- has him frozen between the need to be what he’s supposed to be and the want to be free, and these warring ideals within his own mind leave him grasping and uncertain and--and angry at everything (family, town, society, himself) for putting him there to begin with and then-- and then-- he goes to samwell

MEANWHILE there’s a little nursey, small and surrounded by smiling parents and nannies and love, and somehow, despite it all, he’s anxious. it’s his brain, probably, but at four, nursey doesn’t know anything about brains, all he knows is that his parents aren’t home and maybe that’s his fault and before he can understand how jobs work and how their importance doesn’t outweigh his parents’ love for him, he’s sitting at home wondering how to be better, how to be enough to keep them there, how to be good. and he excels in all his classes, gets bored sitting there with all his fancy private school kindergarten work finished on his desk, and his parents bring him to the doctor’s thinking it’s an attention disorder and he gets diagnosed with anxiety. at eight. and his parents-- mama gets mad (and nursey hasn’t yet learned to distinguish anger at the world and anger at him) and mom becomes focused, ready to fix it (not realizing, really, how nursey sees it as a need to fix him) and dad is maybe the best, he just buys some puzzles and makes hot cocoa and sits with nursey when the world gets too tough, and still nursey leaves thinking i’m a burden, he has to take the time to do this, i’m a burden, and he grows up with the idea that he has to be good, can’t be broken, has to pretend to be perfect even if he isn’t otherwise his parents will be sad and it will be his fault, and it works (until it doesn’t) and he thrives (until he doesn’t) and everything is happy and perfect and wonderful (until it isn’t) and things break apart and nursey decides perfection is impossible to fabricate but pretending to be chill, pretending to at least be okay is enough, and so he moves on with this veneer of okayness and this mess of anxiety and apprehension and worry underneath and it’s such a delicate balance he somehow manages to handle until samwell

(under the cut bc, well. it got a little long. oops?)

and there it’s like-- they’re both at the perfect point to just completely explode one another. nursey sees this walking ball of seemingly together person and pokes at it, this kind of self-projection thing really, trying to break the outside and see the mess within, and meanwhile dex looks at nursey and sees someone perfectly content with everything in life and turns on every probing question like it’s an attack, and maybe it takes a few terms-- maybe all of their frog year-- to start seeing past the cracks. maybe a few of nursey’s questions poke at places more sensitive than he’d meant to see, and maybe dex calls nursey out on things his anxiety has whipped out of control, and maybe after they lose the playoffs and dex is angry and violent and not enough and nursey sees that-- feels the ache of imperfection, too-- and somehow the knowledge that he’s not alone makes it better? and suddenly he wants to make it better for dex, too? and so they go into the summer after frog year with the beginnings of an understanding and things are-- tentative, but they know how to deal with fragility better than most, and it survives the break, survives the infrequent texts and tangential group chat conversations

and sophomore year they have rooms across the hall from one another, randomly. they walk together to practices, because why not, and tag along on team breakfasts (dex is a morning person, nursey is not, dex likes being helpful, nursey likes making it to bfast before holster eats all the waffles) and maybe they start talking-- actually talking, not barbs and banter and chirps just a bit too sharp to laugh at. it’s like an actual conversation for the first time since they’ve known each other, and c’s ecstatic and their hockey’s great and things are going wonderful.

until one of them catches feelings.

it doesn’t quite matter which one of them-- maybe dex falls in love with the way nursey gestures with his hands too much as he talks and how he waxes poetic about everything, but mostly nature and books and how it feels to smile without knowing it, and maybe dex falls in love with the way he feels around nursey, like he could say anything and nursey wouldn’t- he’d judge, maybe, because nursey likes doing that, but it would never be maliciously, it would always be out of a want for dex to grow, learn, be himself more. and seriously, that wouldn’t be hard to fall in love with

or maybe nursey falls in love with the weird bits of knowledge dex drops about any and everything, always attributed to an aunt or uncle, of which he likely has an unlimited stock, and the way that dex catches him when he trips on the sidewalk and the strong, sure way his hands curl around nursey’s body, and how when he gets flustered or embarrassed or angry or happy, his flush is a different shade depending on the emotion, and how nursey-- when he’s around dex-- doesn’t wonder if dex thinks what he’s saying is dumb-- he probably does-- because dex cares anyway and isn’t that just completely and wholly unavoidably wonderful?

so. one of them falls in love. there’s a dib flip. dex goes a little overboard. so does nursey. neither of them reacts accordingly and it’s nearly impossible to say which one reacts to the other’s overreaction. one person has their heart beat up (he still doesn’t like me, he still thinks i’m just someone to annoy) and then they lose before they even make the playoffs and then jack and bitty come out on live tv and dex’s parents infer things that break expectations and nursey’s parents start fighting (unrelated) and nursey wonders if it’s his fault (it isn’t) and they come back to samwell in the fall poised to break one another apart.

if in frog year it was an explosion, in junior year it’s a careful disassembly. they poke at the soft spots they’ve learned in the past year until the whole living situation comes crumbling down and, in the rumble, everything is silent and so much clearer. nursey is alone in a top bunk with a broken wrist, isolated from the team and his parents, scattered across the globe for work in an effort to get away from one another. dex is tucked away in the basement, sucking at hockey as his body refuses to get used to a different d-partner and his conversations with his parents consist of short sentences and loaded silences, and he has no idea what to do with either.

spring comes early that year. flowers poking up amongst frost-bitten blades of grass, birds chirping in the early hours of practices. nursey is back on the ice. he and dex don’t speak, except to work through plays. it begins to come back-- their understanding-- if only on the ice.

bitty starts visiting jack more on the weekends and chowder is off with caitlin and doing compsci homework and talking to recruiters. whiskey usually isn’t there anyway and tango is off doing everything and the waffles are cool but suddenly they seem so young.

on saturday nights, dex cooks and nursey sits at the table with him and complains, mostly to himself at first, about his writing prof. as the weeks wear on, dex adds his own complaints, too. sometimes nursey will throw in something good that happened. sometimes dex will tell a joke (usually a pun, usually horrible, usually inducing belly-aches in nursey regardless). afterwards they do the dishes. dex mentions how he used to love doing the dishes, how it calmed him. how his brother used to comment on it disparagingly. nursey mentions, another time, how his roommate at andover would hate the impromptu headphone dance parties he’d put on-- how it was something he’d do with his dad, when he was young. how it made things better, for a while.

(they never really talk about when happened, dex’s parents or nursey’s, the ache of loneliness that fall term, not until very later, after samwell, after-- well. it takes a while, but when they finally do talk about it, it hurts less if only because of the delicateness with which they’ve learned how to handle such things, by then)

 by the time the end of the year arrives-- when they win  the fucking playoffs and hoist bitty onto their shoulders with a burning pride in their chests-- nursey and dex would call one another friends. to their faces and everything. and then there’s a banquet and dex gets the c and-- as a twist-- nursey gets the a (maybe coach and hall approached dex before the banquet, explained how close the votes were, asked him if he’d mind, and dex gave the most honest answer maybe he’d ever given in his life-- it would be an honor)

they go into the summer with one another at the top of their messages. they call nearly every week, snapchat daily, about nursey’s internship at a publishing house, dex’s at a tech company in boston. maybe nursey panic-calls dex at three in the morning going on about the publishing process and how crazy it is and how i’m never going to be published and dex calms him down with some seriously misinformed words about the literary business that make nursey breathe easy anyway, and maybe dex goes home one weekend and there’s radio silence until dex calls him on the way back home and asks nursey to just talk and so from maine until massachussetts it’s nursey’s voice rambling about pears and children’s books and cooking equipment until dex gets back to the apartment his internship is paying for and simply says thank you

and they go into senior year this unquestionable team with a legacy to uphold. dex works through plays without hesitation, showing the baby frogs (juniors, they call them) the ropes and silently making the team a warm space, while nursey inspires and comforts and corrects the little things, and they run the haus in the same way-- nursey planning movie nights and board game nights (now that holster and jack are gone and there are strict rules in place) and dex is usually there in the kitchen, cooking and baking and willing to listen to anything the players have to say, and if you asked any of the baby frogs what they thought of dex and nursey’s relationship, they would’ve said that their captains had been friends for years (and maybe, in the right light, that would be true)

how they get together at this point is not important. whichever one didn’t catch feelings sophomore year found them, sometime afterwards, behind a box of forgotten things, forgotten only because they’d been there quietly for so long that no one had every thought to question their presence, and so, in senior year, when they are both in places where things are no longer fragile, where “broken” is a word easily thrown away, they come together with little fanfare.

over a pie, one softly raining afternoon, or in a slipped-into-snowbank on the way back from practice, or in the library over an open textbook or between laughter or in the moments before sleep embraces them on a roadie, or any number of other things.

that is not the most important part-- it’s important, of course, but not the most-- the most important part is that they were, are, together long before any moment like that occurs. because they both learned, grew from the volatile, fragile people they arrived as. grew because they forced each other, became better, stronger, with the guidance and comfort and assurance the other offered. because that is what makes a partnership, a bond of the souls, a love like theirs. it is not being perfect, not even being perfect for one another, but being there and willing to grow.

maybe it’s samwell-- got your back-- that puts them in a place where this kind of process can work. maybe it’s the nature of college itself. maybe it would’ve happened regardless of where they were. but it happened, and it’s wonderful, and that’s what matters.