#ideal friend to ask sucks at sticking to plans

[no-one-hears-me]

sobriety is a curse someone please send me vodka

[queen-haq]

Fic: Grudgingly Yours (Part 4)

Fic: Grudgingly Yours (Part 4)

Summary: You are a general surgeon, working in a hospital that’s slowly sucking the life out of you when one day you’re given the offer of a lifetime.

A.K.A  - An arranged marriage fic :)

Pairing: Billy Russo x You

Rating: R

Masterlist (contains links to my other stories and this one)

Chapter 4

You bit down on your bottom lip, looking at the project plan for the next few weeks. Ideally you would have loved to open a hospital but that was beyond your current means. As a compromise, you made the decision to go with an urgent care clinic in your childhood neighbourhood. There was a lot of administrative red tape to get through before you could even begin working on your plans and that’s why you’d engaged two of your closest friends for help. Jacintha was a marketing executive for a healthcare company, and Ritu was a financial analyst, and they were the perfect people to guide you towards your goals. The three of you had accomplished what needed to be done today, and were taking a break now.

 “Any more pizza left?” Ritu asked.

 You peeked through the boxes. “Nah, we finished it all. I can order more?”

 “No, I had too much already,” Ritu said, drinking her glass of wine.

 Jacintha was scrolling through her phone, her feet up on the couch. “There’s no one here that’s even remotely interesting,” she grumbled. “Everyone’s either ugly or a fuckboy.”

 You laughed. While Ritu was happily married, Jacintha was single and on the lookout for fun dates. Except her friend had very high expectations and there weren’t that many men that met her standards. “Maybe you should venture outside Manhattan,” you offered.

 “I’d rather shoot myself than date a guy from Jersey.”

 “My thoughts exactly.”

 Hearing Billy’s voice, you turned around to find him standing at the entrance to the room. Dressed casually in a maroon jumper, black jeans and signature leather jacket, he appeared amused as his eyes languidly took in your friends. When you’d seen him earlier today he was heading out with another woman – so why the fuck was he back and interrupting your night?

 Irritation surged through you. You’d made up an excuse about Billy being busy when Jacintha had inquired about his whereabouts, but now he was here and that meant you had to put on a show for your friends. “Thought you were gonna be gone all night, honey.”

 Both Ritu and Jacintha watched him curiously, with Jacintha taking the lead in approaching him. “Glad you made it home, Billy. Didn’t think we were going to meet you today but I’m glad you’re here.” She reached out to hug him, and you noted how Billy returned the hug with enthusiasm. “I’m Jacintha, Y/N’s would-be maid of honour –“

 Ritu scoffed.

 “- if you hadn’t gone off and eloped with her,” Jacintha continued, sticking out her tongue at Ritu.

 You rolled your eyes, watching as Ritu made her way towards Billy.

 “Only way Jas would’ve been maid of honour is if I turned it down.” Ritu extended her hand out to Billy. “Hi, I’m Ritu. And we need the complete story behind this whirlwind romance. Y/N’s being way too tight-lipped about the details.”

 His response was a gorgeous smile. “I don’t know what lies she told you, but eloping was her idea not mine.”

 What the fuck? Spotting the wicked glint in his eyes, you knew he’d thrown you under the bus on purpose. Asshole!

 “Come on, Billy. Don’t lie to my friends,” you teased, sauntering over to where he stood. “They’re gonna think I didn’t have a wedding on purpose.”

 Jas frowned. “Did you elope just to get out of picking a maid of honour?”

 You put on a fake smile. “Look what you did, sweetheart.”

 His voice was nauseatingly sweet. “Just being honest, love.”

 “So tell us about yourself, Billy,” Ritu prodded.

 “Like you guys didn’t google me?” Billy fired back.

 Jaz confronted him with a raised eyebrow. “We did. What we found wasn’t great. Definitely not the kind of guy who deserves Y/N.”

 “Okay. That’s enough.” You walked over to Billy and grabbed his hand. “Can we talk alone?”

 Dark eyes bore into your soul. “If you insist.”

 You dragged him away, leaving your perplexed friends watching after you.

 Once inside the spare office room, you closed the door behind. “Why are you here?”

 Billy cocked his eyebrow, smirking as he strut toward the couch. Sitting down, he regarded you with amusement. “Last time I checked this is my place.”

 “Wrong. It’s your grandfather’s and he gifted it to both of us. So you can shove that bullshit.” You glared at him with hostility. “We had a deal. You stay out of my way when I have people over.”

 He shrugged his shoulders. “I don’t remember agreeing to that.”

 Exasperated, you crossed your arms. “Do I harass your dates when you bring them home?”

 “My dates don’t take over the entire place.”

 “Upstairs is your area, downstairs is mine. That was your rule!”

 “That Jacintha’s cute.”

 Irritation surged through you at the abrupt change in topic. “Don’t hit on my friends.”

 He cocked his eyebrow. “Figures you’re the jealous type.”

 “I’m not jealous, you moron. I just don’t want you creeping on them.”

 “Tell me something. That whole scene during dinner, standing up for me, bitching out the old man, that was all an act, right?”

 “What are you talking about?”

 He leaned forward. The smile from before was now replaced with a somber look, his dark steely gaze holding you hostage. “You planned it, didn’t you? Plotted with him so you’d look good to me?”

 “What makes you think I care enough to do that?” You held his stare, challenging him back. “Whatever issues you have with your family, it’s none of my business. I only stood up for you because I fucking hate bullies. I already told you that. But if you don’t believe me, I don’t give a shit.”

 His eyes remained on you, unwavering and hostile, staring at you intently. “Let me see your phone.”

 You scowled. “No.”

 “Why not?”

 “Why should I?”

 “Because I want to prove something to myself.”

 “How’s my phone gonna help with that?”

 “Let me worry about it.”

 “Go fuck yourself.”

 He smiled. “Show me your phone and I’ll keep my distance from your friends. That work for you?”

 “Fine.” Taking out your cell from your back pocket, you approached him. You unlocked the screen and handed it to him. “Here. Have your fill.”

 You regarded him cautiously while he scrolled through to look for any incriminating conversations between you and Alistair. There would be none, just a whole bunch of missed calls from the old man since the night of the dinner party. And a vague text message where he threatened you.

 “You’ve been ignoring his calls. Alistair won’t like that.”

 “He’ll get over it.”

 “He’s dangerous when he’s crossed. And you pissed him off by standing up for me.”

 “I can take care of myself,” you huffed, grabbing your phone back from him.

 “You have to be so flippant about everything?” Billy asked.

 The fake concern in his tone was infuriating, like he actually cared about you when it was the farthest thing from the truth. “Don’t pretend like you give a shit about me.”

 He cocked his eyebrow. “Is that what you think? At least with you I know what I have to deal with. If he takes you down, I have to worry about what he has planned next. That’s the only reason I’m warning you.”

 “Whatever.” You slipped your phone back into your pocket. “Now, please get the fuck out.”

 “Who’s Calvin?”

 You froze. Of course the fucker noticed all the text messages from him. “None of your business.”

 A cold smile curved Billy’s lips. “Boyfriend? He seems to be, texts you a lot.”

 “You jealous?”

 “Keep dreaming, sweetheart.” He leaned forward and picked up a random magazine that was on the coffee table. His voice was casual, deliberately calm when he spoke next. “Just curious about how your boyfriend feels you marrying me for money. Calvin okay with the golddigger lifestyle?”

 “He lets me make my own decisions.”

 Billy’s voice reeked of sarcasm. “Sounds like a real man.”

 “He is.”

 Billy scoffed.

 “Why are we even talking about this? I don’t butt into your business, do I?”

 “Oh, you didn’t tell Gwen we were married?”

 You rolled your eyes, remembering the blonde from a few weeks ago. “That was once. You’ve had other women here since then and I haven’t bothered them.”

 His intense, lingering stare remained affixed on you, making you feel unexpectedly self-conscious. You were in jeans, an oversized t-shirt, and wearing no make-up. It was supposed to be a casual night in and you’d dressed accordingly, but you weren’t prepared for Billy to give you the kind of look that speared right through to your soul. His stillness made you nervous, making you feel like he was plotting your death or something. You preferred it when he espoused hateful rhetoric instead. “Anything else?” you prodded. “Or can I go back to my friends?”

 “Do whatever you want.”

 Despite the insolence in his words, his voice was a husky, throaty drawl, smooth like whiskey, like he was trying to seduce.

 Or maybe you were just being an idiot.

 Without saying anything else, you turned around and walked out.

 ***

 Upon returning to your friends, they surrounded you immediately.

 “What’s going on?” Jas asked.

 “Nothing,” you replied, trying to maintain your calm exposure.

 “You’re lying to us,” Ritu piped up.

 You started stacking the empty pizza boxes. “What do you mean?”

 “That’s not how newlyweds act!” Jas accused.

 “Why? Just because I’m not all over him in front of you guys? That doesn’t prove anything!”

 “None of this makes sense. You elope with a guy none of us even knew you were dating, supposedly because the two of you are so madly in love, but that’s not what we saw just now. You guys looked like you hate each other!”

 You ran your fingers through your hair. Shit.

 “Tell us what’s going on. Are you in trouble?” Ritu asked.

 “Whatever it is, just tell us. We’ll help you.”

 Guilt surged through you as you stared back at your best friends. They were genuinely concerned and worried about something happening to you, and there you were lying to them. You sighed, taking a seat.

 Then you started telling the truth.

 ***

 A week later you walked into the penthouse suite, your feet aching in the stilettos you were wearing. Jas and you had gone out to dinner so she could give you notes on the prenup. Even though you’d reassured her multiple times that your lawyer had vetted it thoroughly and negotiated the best terms for you, she wasn’t convinced and insisted one of her contacts, a prominent divorce attorney, review the details. The lawyer did have some feedback but ultimately agreed it was a good deal. Finally Jas was convinced you hadn’t lost your mind with this deal, and the two of you went clubbing after. You were used to staying up all night from working at the hospital, but the whole heels thing was new to you.

 Sighing, you undid the straps and threw the shoes aside, groaning with relief when your feet hit the ground. As you started walking back to your room, you cut through the living room only to find Billy sound asleep. You stopped for a second, simply watching him. Not sure why he was even downstairs, but there he was on the couch, in a black razor tank and jeans, sleeping on his side. There were a couple of empty beer bottles on the coffee table. He was facing you, hair ruffled, eyes closed, one arm tucked under his head and the other splayed on his side. Watching him as he laid there, you had to admit he really was a beautiful man – as long as he kept his mouth shut. You usually liked them stocky and broad-shouldered, gym guys who you knew could lift you without much trouble, but Billy was lean and toned. Not that he wasn’t muscular, he definitely was, but you doubted he could pick you up. Or that he’d want to. You saw the women he slept with, you were definitely not his type. And you had no interest in being one of them.

 You sauntered past him and headed for your room.

 An hour later you were freshly showered and dressed in a silk robe, eating Greek yogurt in the kitchen to satisfy your late-night hunger cravings when you heard a crash coming from the living room. Worried, you quickly marched towards the noise. Upon entering the room, you found broken glass shards from the beer bottles atop the coffee table and Billy on his knees, one hand gripping the edge of the table while the other was clutching his chest.

 His skin was flushed, slick with sweat, eyes stricken with panic. He looked like he couldn’t breathe, as if he was dying.

 Immediately you switched to doctor mode. Rushing, you sat down next to him. “Are you hurt? Bleeding? What’s going on? Talk to me,” you ordered, keeping your voice normal and calm so as not to agitate him further. With an expert touch you examined his hands to make sure he didn’t cut himself - he didn’t - and swiped the beads of moisture from his forehead.

 His breathing was ragged, he didn’t speak, a wild expression on his face matching the far away look in his eyes, like he was somewhere else at the moment.

 You started rubbing his back, hoping the physical contact would tether him to reality. “Billy, you’re fine. You’re okay.” Repeating yourself over and over again, you soothed him, stroking his back, caressing the hair on the nape of his neck, your other hand covering his chest where his heart resided.

 It took a while for his heart to return to normal speed. The entire time he was locked in your embrace, pressing into you, squeezing you tightly like his life depended on it.

 After a short while, Billy finally spoke. “It’s hot. I’m hot.”

 Voice husky, body warm to the touch, you realized he needed some air. “Do you want some water?” You attempted to move away but he grabbed your hand that was on his chest and held it in place.

 “No. Just need to take this off.” In one quick gesture he pulled off his tank and threw it aside. You tried not to stare at the wounds on his chest, burn marks and lashings, like he’d been tortured. They were fully healed, a few years old from what you could tell, but the scars remained, forever haunting him. Your heart ached, realizing he must have gone through sheer hell to survive that.

 Your fingers caressed his chest. “You should get some sleep.”

 Billy finally met your gaze. The emotion in his eyes made your stomach clench with anxiety. There was no anger, no contempt, just raw, stark need for something you didn’t understand. His dark eyes were crystal clear, no cloudiness in them, like he was seeing you for the first time.

 And then suddenly he stood and lifted you up, carrying you over to the couch behind you both. He sat back on the cushion, you straddling him, one arm encircling your waist while the other hand fisted the back of your hair.

 Eyes locked on one another, breaths trembling, you swallowed audibly as you waited for him to say something, do anything. But he didn’t move, didn’t speak, only watching you.

 Minutes passed, every second feeling like an eternity.

 Your heart was pounding in your chest, so loud you worried he could hear it. Could he? Could he see how he was affecting you? That your nipples were hard and your pussy wet from grinding down on his jeans? That his heated skin pulsed through you like a vibrator and you felt every brush, every stroke, every touch of his fingers strumming you like a guitar?

 You didn’t know why you did it, why your fingers curved around his throat, why the other played with his earlobe. You were teasing him, taunting him, daring him to make a move. To take you.

 Electric jolts ran through your body when he unexpectedly moved in closer, the top of his head brushing against your mouth, his lips blowing soft air on your neck as he inhaled you in. “You smell so good.”  

 Wetness pooled between your legs, your body taut with tension. Your arms wrapped around his neck and shoulders, holding on tight. Did he know what he was doing to you? Was it a ploy? How could he sound so desperate and vulnerable and still be playing you?

You didn’t understand, because you couldn’t think. How were you supposed when his erection was nudging your thighs? There was no fucking escape from him, he’d ingrained himself in you completely. Wrapped around every inch of you, next to you, under you, all-consuming solid presence of his body overwhelming all of your senses.

 “Will you stay with me?” he whispered, soft, gentle, making your heart pulse the way your body did. “Help me sleep?”

 There was nothing else you could say. “Yes.”

 You couldn’t turn him down, not the part that was trained to heal patients, nor the woman in you that was utterly exposed to someone who was begging for help.

 And so when Billy cradled you in his arms and maneuvered you both to lay down on the couch, his hand squeezing yours as he pressed a warm kiss on your temple, you simply closed your eyes and let the warmth sweep over you.

A/N - Um, thoughts? 

[phoenixtakaramono]

Butchlander M, N, P if you please. :)

(This Ask is regarding this.) Always happy to provide some HCs!

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Butcher’s accent turns Homelander on like no other.

Homelander is like a tomcat in heat; there has not been a season, barring S4, where we don’t see him getting his rocks off either with a sexual partner or by himself. The sight of Billy wearing an apron and expertly kneading dough with his flour-dusted fingers and the muscles of his forearms bunching beneath the skin could enter Homelander’s periphery during an important conference call with Vought’s board of directors—and Homelander would be distracted throughout the meeting with insignificant boring mudpeople with his brain in the gutter thinking about sucking on Billy’s fingers and fantasizing about having his 6’1” British man bend him over the kitchen counter or vice versa. I think once they’re in a relationship or once he has locked in on Billy as the perfect male specimen to copulate with, there are four things about William J. Butcher that’d primarily make him pop a boner:

1) Billy being uncharacteristically sweet and coming to Homelander’s defence in public, sticking up for him and cuttingly disparaging anyone who talks shite about the hero whilst simultaneously propping Homelander up to soothe his ego (bonus points if it’s directed toward someone Homelander can’t talk back to; extra bonus points if Homelander heard that Billy had made the person cry; extra extra bonus points if Billy’s coming across as possessive y’know, “the only person who gets to talk to you that way is me; your life belongs to me” typical villain-obsessed-with-the-hero rhetoric); it’s just the unexpectedness of it, coming from Butcher, that’d make the biggest impact on Homelander;

2) experiencing moments of unexpected domestic bliss that fits Homelander’s ideal “white picket fence” American Dream he’s been conditioned to crave (of owning a home, a loving wife husband, children a loving son, a loving family, a dog, and a happily ever after);

3) Billy thinking Homelander’s finally cool and trustworthy enough to start involving him in The Boys operations, being forthcoming about his sinister plans regarding how he’s going to blackmail or assassinate someone or systematically dismantle their reputation and empire piece-by-piece (bonus points if Billy’s target is someone whom Homelander recognises who’s either one of his loud hecklers/ antifans, his competition in the superhero business that he’s complained to Billy about, or is just someone in general whom Homelander has been bellyaching about; extra bonus points if Homelander senses an opportunity to be helpful—because he’s “just the perfect generous dream lover and William would now be indebted to him for coming to his rescue solving their little problem that he and his lover’s useless friends obviously couldn’t handle by themselves”);

4) Billy literally murdering someone in cold blood “to protect their family” or to “protect him.” Oh, imagine the bloody kisses, bloodstained hands cradling each other’s faces, and Homelander whispering breathlessly, touched beyond measure, “You did this for me?”

As long as Homelander does not perceive his authority being challenged in front of others, he’d even be willing to tolerate kinks he’d never explored before—whether it be degradation (not his favourite, mind you; he’s more of a praise-kink type of guy, but he’d come around to Billy’s rapid-fire dirty talk that’s more on the meaner side) or forced feminisation. He’s not effeminate (that’s a whole another Pandora’s box) and will always have this complex of wanting to be perceived as this masculine alpha male kinda guy whom everyone listens to, but behind closed doors he thinks it’s so hot that William is physiologically affected seeing him wear women’s lingerie for him and “looking handsome and pretty” for him. It’s the taboo nature of anything that’d turn Homelander on. For someone who’s been ordered around his entire life, doing something considered to be “sinful and shameless” is like a good strait-laced kid going through his rebellious phase—and nothing’s more taboo than being led astray and being bedded by a “bad boy.” For once he doesn’t have to be a superhero; he can just turn his brain off, enjoy the ride, and be bossed around by someone he finds hot and obviously knows what they’re doing. His body is virtually indestructible, so no matter what “new fun experiments” Billy wants to test on him to “spice up their sex life,” he’s always down to try everything at least once. He’s the hero who’s straightened the villainous William J. Butcher out plus the sex is incredible—and that is probably the biggest turn-on for him.

For Billy, it’s Homelander submitting to him. It’s seeing the hero act differently from the monstrous image Billy’s built of him inside his head that does it for him, whether it be indulging Homelander’s lactation oral fixation, fucking the brattiness out of him (it does something for Billy when he sees that infuriating, haughty look of superiority in those blue eyes be wiped away into sweetness whenever Billy pounds into that slightly hard, spongy sweet spot inside Homelander), or Homelander behaving very affectionately with him in the afterglow. Billy will never admit it—and he will always make fun of Homelander for acting clingy, as if he regards Billy as the linchpin to his existence—but he secretly likes it when Homelander seems to have made it his mission to make physical contact with Billy, whether it be scrabbling at his shoulders, his arms, hooking his legs around him or hanging his legs off Billy’s shoulders whenever they do the deed. Topping Homelander is the biggest turn-on for Billy, because he still gets to “bully” him (even though it’s different). He gets to experiment with things he’d been curious about but would never try with Becca—or any ordinary human being for that matter. It’s like pairing a person with sadistic tendencies with someone with submissive, masochistic tendencies—who happens to be indestructible and has an attitude problem that needs correcting for the good of humanity. Bonus points if it’s because of him that Homelander becomes a moaning, incoherent mess, with his pretty blue eyes slightly wet at the lashes from the “bullying” and overstimulation, but clearly still wanting more. He’s made Homelander into this—and that turns him on.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

This is less of a HC and more tied to canon, but the moment Homelander hears “squirt” or “squirter” or any variation of that from Billy’s lips, that instantly kills his mood because it triggers a traumatic embarrassing memory in his childhood of being caught with his pants down wanking off and Marty seeing that and giving him that nickname. And, no, he will never get past this. This grown adult man in his 40s will roll himself off Billy’s d!ck, burrito himself in the blankets, and be a big sulky inconsolable baby for the rest of the night. Homelander won’t say it but he expects to be coddled and his face or his shoulder planted with tiny, soft, intimate kisses and be asked what’s wrong and how can he make him feel better—even if Homelander won’t give him an answer (it’s a bit of a Catch-22 situation since he obviously won’t be getting an apology from Billy who’s uninformed about all this but neither is Homelander willing to fess up about what’s gotten him into a sudden b!tchy fit)—or else he’s going to feel unsatisfied and continue giving Billy the cold shoulder, or be petty, well into the next day.

Other turn-offs would be any mention of past sexual partners during sex, i.e. Madelyn (HL), Stormfront (HL), Maeve (HL & Billy), and especially any accidental slip of the tongue that conjures a memory of Becca Saunders for Billy (Billy & HL). It doesn’t even have to be a Freudian slip of the tongue by Homelander. It’s anything innocuous that Billy’s brain associates with his late wife (whether it’s something random like seeing her favourite cereal brand, or a Spice Girls song suddenly coming on the radio whilst the two men are being hot and heavy, or a joke Homelander makes about them being like husband and wife) that’d kill Billy’s raging hard-on, make Billy go flaccid, and he will instantly freeze all bedroom activities. Nothing Homelander can say or do, once Billy gets like this, will fix it. If it’s a particularly bad triggering episode, Billy will leave and not without some unkind parting words. The topic of Becca is the figurative wife-sized giant elephant in the room that will forever loom over their relationship. The Cold War that Billy’s launched will last until he’s able to extricate himself out of his depressed, self-loathing funk—perhaps needing a trip to Becca’s grave and having a long heart-to-heart talk sitting down with her tombstone—and he’s finally calmed himself down to be able to return to Homelander’s side without feeling that same vengeful, self-destructive violent impulse burning inside him calling for Homelander’s blood which’d consumed Billy’s life for more than a decade.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Depends on the occasion, the mood, the time, the place and the setting.

I imagine they’re usually more fast and rough if it’s a quickie or either one wanting to give the other a bj or a quick handjob, particularly with Homelander’s superhero schedule and whatever Billy’s gotten himself involved into this time. Time is a luxury. And they’re both pressed for time. Not to mention if there’s a bit of the hatefuck dynamic happening; no lube, just spit will do. Their breaths mingling, bodies pressed up tightly together in a broom closet, in a dirty back alley, at The Seven’s boardroom, etcétera.

If it’s slow and sensual, either Billy is deliberately trying to seduce Homelander—or they’ve already reached the level of being in a established relationship where Billy’s harsh edges had been worn down to be softer and a semblance of trust has been forged between them. Anytime Billy sees Homelander acting a little more human, a little more like John and less like Homelander, those tiny reminders gentles him out into being a sweeter and considerate, sentimental lover. I imagine it’s a big deal whenever it happens. It’s rare, very intimate, requires some vulnerability, and represents how far they’d come. Homelander has always adored the act of making love to someone he loves, so he’s equally as smitten with being made love to by someone whom he believes he’s single-handedly managed to change their mind about him and orchestrated into falling in love with him. It strokes his ego knowing he’s converted his biggest hater into his biggest fan (this is not really the case, but Billy just accepts it and lets Homelander enjoy his delulu fantasy because it’s what makes him happy).

[vonpharma]

ok, well, this is kind of ridiculous and sad, but the husband of one of the sicktember mods is now harassing me on my personal blog for giving some pretty lukewarm criticism of the event in the past few years. i have not picked fights with anyone or tried to incite any kind of ire myself, just been professional and upfront with how much it's sucked to fall out of love with my favourite writing event. i sadly deleted the more vitriolic response i got from them, but here is what they left on my post:

again, i cannot stress enough, i have not contacted the mods in any capacity! i have not left any tags on their posts, i have not interacted with them except last year to ask permission for a spinoff blog, all my thoughts & feelings have just been on my personal blog.

in 2022, i filled every prompt for sicktember, totalling at 92 thousand words total. in 2023, i did the same, at 118 thousand words. i adore this event, so much so that i complete it every year despite my busy work schedule. it has always been my absolute favourite--the accessibility of it, the community, the prep time, writing with people who love the fic trope as much as i.

i am not just some rando. i am not just some bad actor, here to incite drama. i am a fan of this event who has been consistently supportive and celebratory, using my large following to both plug said event and rope my many servers and friends into it. in fact, in 2022, my friends and i wrote more fills for our fandom than any other:

that is us. i counted, and only 4 of the fills in the aa tag are by people not in my immediate friend circle.

i love this event enough i have physical books of all our fills:

...and this isn't even all of them, this is just how many i could afford to make at the time. i don't know how to prove that i am a savant for this event, and a passionate supporter. not from day one, as i didn't know of it until 2022... but definitely for the long-haul.

it is really unfortunate that this is the response the fans of this event are getting. in my initial post i talked about how resistant to feedback the event runners are are, but now we are getting full-on attacks if we don't blindly worship every aspect of said event and kiss the event runners' feet.

a word to the wise: when you run an event, it is not so black and white. it is not just two sides, where one is "i am spending time and effort on this thing i love and how to best share it with others, so i do not owe them anything." and the other is "i must bend to the whims of everything my fellows ask!" there is nuance in the middle, where you can keep firm in your ideals, protect your free time, and still listen to what your community is saying. compromise is a wonderful skill to learn.

either way, sending your friends & family to pick fights with the disappointed or barely critical fans of your event on their personal blogs is wretched behaviour regardless. i am not interested in petty internet arguments with people. i am interested in making my feelings known with the hope that maybe something can be changed. whether that be that the mods loosen up to community feedback & try to open a dialogue, or some folks who feel similarly to me take it as inspiration to make their own sickfic-centric prompt event, or nothing happens at all--it doesn't matter.

but this is literally my personal blog. where i post my personal feelings. if you don't like them, ignore them, scroll past them, block me if you must.

i have 3000 words of sicktember prep in another window and wholeheartedly plan to attempt my best to stick to my record of doing every single fill and having a blast. but if another event comes along, and the mods of this one don't intend to change how they interact with their fans, it won't really be a contest where i go from there.

this is not a call for harrassment, please do not act unkind or bother anyone involved here, i'm just sad man. and i figure if people are gonna start attacking more outspoken members of the community, y'all might want their usernames to block.

as always, i will keep on writing for you guys.

[thegrinningghost]

Day 1 : Chief

hey-o! A friend sent me the prompt list, so I figured I’d post some of my contributions!

(this is my first time doing something like this, sooo stick with me)

· · ────── ·𖥸· ────── · ·

“Chief?”

“You going to let him? You going to let him talk to you like that?”

“Eh,  .   .   .  Chief?”

Ralph’s eyes paced back and forth. Jack was rounding down towards Piggy, taunting him with the prospect of breaking his glasses. Roger was nearing Ralph, spreading rumor and doubt from over his shoulder. ‘Chief?’ The question echoed in Ralph’s head: ‘What is a chief?’ He cast Jack a glance, then Piggy; all could be chief in their own right–they were good and smart enough–but he was selected. Why? What was so special about him that made everyone decide he should be chief.

“Yes,” Ralph said at last, any further discussion silenced. Everyone stood in awe, watching as Ralph stepped down to Piggy, pushing past Jack. “I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry took your glasses. I’m sorry I lost my temper,” he rambled, “I’m sorry I told them your name if it comes to that. I’m sorry. You were right  .   .   .  if we hadn’t let the fire out  .   .   .  we got stupid, really.” Ralph turned towards the yard of boys branching out in roots around him. “We must do things prop’ly,” he explained as he gestured towards Piggy, “like he said.” 

Everyone stared, following as Ralph paced along the beach, plotting out his plan of advancements. “Sam’nEric will start first,” he said, pointing towards the mountain where the remnants of the fire lay. The twins nodded along.

“It must never–”

“Go out!”

Ralph grinned, continuing on. Simon, sat up at the end of beach, stood up slowly, glancing out to the sea, and then back to Ralph, who Piggy was trailing close behind. Suddenly, Ralph turned back on his heel, facing his malleable audience. “We have to start now; and be sensible. That’s what we have to do. And I say so  .   .   .  I’m chief and I say so.”

As Ralph held up the conch, the sea rumbled, and a voice rose above all. “Why do you listen to him!?”

“Jack–”

“What’s so great about a fire, anyway,” he exclaimed, “We need sharp sticks, like spears, to protect us.”

“Merridew–” tried one of the choir, but Jack snapped immediately at them. Ralph, sensing tension, took his turn to speak some sense back in to the group. “Listen–”

“No you listen! You said I could have the choir, didn’t you,” pushed Jack. He sighed, “I thought you were a regular chap  .   .   .  and you suck up to that  .   .   .  We need spears, that’s what I’m saying. We need a defense force.”

Ralph tried to interrupt, but everyone jumped on to Jack’s ideals. Fear, even when there is nothing to fear, can be such a powerful tool.

· · ────── ·𖥸· ────── · ·

“For a moment there I thought you were the Beastie.”

The boy turned and laughed as Ralph sat down. “Why are you out so late, Simon?” He shrugged. “Just thoughting.” Ralph shook his head, “Thinking?”

Simon laid back in the sand, picking up grains as he stared up at the stars. “Ralph,” he asked, causing the young boy to turn to him. “What,” he hummed, already half-asleep. “I just thought– what you did today  .   .   .  you’re a good leader Ralph. That’s all.” With no answer, Simon turned to find the boy curled up in the sand, the moon and stars offering him a light blanket to hide under. All the weight of the world–or, should he say, the island–is on his shoulders. Simon pondered for a moment if he himself could handle all that pressure, but eventually shrugged the thought away and closed his eyes.

Tomorrow, they could figure out what to do next, and before they’d know it, they’d be off the island. Rescued; home.

[bugdotpng]

4, 9, 19, 20, 25 for the end of the year meme?

4. Movie of the year?

Everything, Everywhere, All at Once, hands down. i'm not a big movie person honestly but i'm so glad i went and saw this w/ some friends. left a blubbering mess. i can definitely tell it's one of those movies i'll be watching over and over again ;w; also watched the fear street trilogy on netflix w/ my friend and really enjoyed those!!

9. Best month for you this year?

probably february! i had a pretty sturdy head on my shoulders and was feeling generally inspired (artistically, mentally, etc.) and stable having experienced the fleeting confidence that came with a diagnosis that i (at the time) thought was really fitting. it didn't last long but it was nice to feel confident for a while that i knew how to approach stuff moving forward. this year generally sucked but i wasn't so horribly burnt out for the beginning of it, so that was nice :'^)

19. What’re you excited about for next year?

having a game plan! i got diagnosed with ADHD in the later part of this year AND i addressed some of my career-related burnout issues with my boss (due to being severely overworked and underpaid, etc.) and visible changes are ACTUALLY being made. i feel like even though this year was objectively fucking awful, i spent a lot of time performing the very arduous task of laying a good foundation for not only next year, but the rest of my life lmao i was able to prioritize stuff and draw some hard boundaries with myself toward the end of the year and i hope to stick to them next year

20. What’s something you learned this year?

i think my answer for 19 suffices here, but in a more literal sense, i learned a lot of neat coding stuff for work! i'm MUCH better than where i was at the beginning of the year and i'm picking up stuff really quick ;w;

25. Did you create any characters (in games, art, or writing) this year? Describe one

MANY lmao, i got to make a little rock gremlin kid named ferris for our alolan pkmn ttrpg campaign (which we haven't played much of but i love ferris a BUNCH)

i also sat down and made like three new characters for my lesbian space catgirls story :^) ideally in a perfect world i would actually make this a little dating sim but for now it's just a word doc lmao. but in my head?? basically a dating sim with cute little tasks and dialogue options to win the favor of the romance-able characters.

i'm particularly fond of merrit, who is an anti-social basement-wizard merchant very passionate about her wares. her role is to just sell shit but you can also romance her by asking her to info-dump about her favorite featured items. she initially comes off as a kinda cold and aloof mysterious cool kid, but after you earn her trust you can see she's a huge fuckin dweeb. i cherish her deeply ghdlfjsk no snart that i wanna share yet tho i'm currently just rotating her in my head :^) she wears a cape with a hood and has SO many pockets

[keefwho]

September 11 - 2023 Monday

11:02 PM

I've forgotten to journal the past few nights. Or more like the night ended so fun and chill that I didn't think about it. The weekend was good, Saturday was a giga party night with Daisy and Egg which was nice of her to show up and hang out with us. Sunday was chill and there was a heavy little chat with Daisy that I'm still thinking about. The past couple days I've kinda zoned out in a way, but nothing out of the ordinary. Just sort of a normal "head empty, no thoughts" kind of cycle.

Today was pretty good for productivity. For breakfast I had my last egg and can of corned beef hash. I was slightly late to stream but it was productive too aside from taking too long on the commission so I couldn't finish it today like would have been optimal. I can afford that right now though. After stream I cleaned my shower with pine sol for the first time which went okay but I'll probably stick to my bleach spray in the future. Also got some on my foot which burned. I used my new treadmill for the first time and I have many complaints with it but it works just enough for me to keep it. My workout went great and I had a second shower afterwards which I consciously know is bad for my hair/skin but didn't actually seem that bad.

Lunch was beef stew with little star pasta I put in it, a hearty meal to have after a workout. I did today's request well and worked this old MLP landscape that's been on my desktop as well as redrawing Daisy's rendition of me as a thirsty little flower.

In the afternoon I played Starfield until I got surprisingly frisky. I didn't plan to do anything about it at first but it got real strong and I knew it was time. It kinda sucked though because 2 minutes after I started, Daisy messaged me for chill time and I didn't see it which sucked because honestly I would have rather hung out with her than jerked off. But I was too deep in and figured I'd finish up which took more time than I intended because I couldn't figure out what I wanted to finish to. Honestly debated asking if she wanted to participate but I'm still feeling wary of that kind of thing. I don't want to give off the wrong impression even though I probably shouldn't be worried about that at this point. I just think we view the topic very differently. I've found that no matter what state things are in in my life, good or bad, being horny is a part of it sometimes. Ideally I'd extend that to my closest friend in the hopes that they understand that too but that might not be the case. And its not a case of needing them to participate, its just needing to let them know whats up in case they wanna help because for some reason it feels important enough for me to get out or I'll bottle it up and let it stress me out a little bit. A bit of a goofy problem.

This evening Daisy and I chilled while playing Zelda and Spyro respectively. I felt bad(?) because my head was empty tonight. I enjoyed the company like always but I didn't have much to say. I just enjoyed being there an listening honestly. I'm still trying to figure out how to make it more clear how much nights together mean to me, or our morning messages, or literally any other interaction. I'm sure it's known but I like making constant fresh reminders about my appreciation. Ever increasingly clear communication is my goal here and while I can acknowledge it is VERY good, it's not perfect and might never be. But I believe the level of communication can steadily edge closer to 100% even if it never reaches that.

In a way right now I'm aware of the massive challenges ahead and my ever changing life, even if the change is slow. It's all too much to comprehend and navigate without a plan, at least for me. I'm still trying to accept that I do work best with a schedule and I should be using that to my advantage in every way I can, even if it's weird to other people how I might control certain things about myself. Ultimately my life is in my own hands and I can choose not to bend to the will or perceptions of others.

I keep talking about change and how I think of a lot of action but don't usually commit a lot of action. At least not as quickly as I'd like. I do make small changes to my schedules and rules over time and I am seeing progress. I just don't know if I could be evolving things faster or not. Maybe if I want to get out of my comfort zone.

[citrustan]

lovefool [drabble 3] (jjk)

pairing: jeon jungkook × reader

genre: angst, fluff (sort of), smut

summary: where taehyung helps jungkook plan for his first official date with you.

word count: 1k-ish

note: hi! this is a drabble of the main story 'lovefool', the chapters of which you can find on my masterlist (pinned post)! also, thank you, truly, for all the love you've given to lovefool and me.

"I think it's a good idea." Jungkook speaks thoughtfully.

"What? The banana soufflé?"

"No, the supermarket date. Definitely not the soufflé. She hates bananas."

Taehyung gasps, "How dare she!"

Jungkook shoves his best friend into the wall, earning a girlish moan from the man.

"Focus. All I know is that she hates bananas and cheese."

"CHEESE? How dare-" Taehyung is flabbergasted, but immediately cut off.

"Please, stop. I've never been this confused in my life." Jungkook puts his finger to his forehead.

"Oh? We're serious about this?" Taehyung raises a brow.

"We are." Jungkook's eyes wander to the fresh basil leaves. You can't go wrong with pesto, can you?

"Why don't you guys just make gimbap? I have my mom's homemade kimchi, I can bring you some. Just get sticky rice and whatever else she prefers." Taehyung suggests.

"Mmh. I dunno, she's a picky eater. What if she doesn't like the seaweed or the egg?"

"Huh, okay. Let's keep looking."

Jungkook and Taheyung are practicing shopping and cooking for Jungkook's and your date the following week.

Well, Jungkook is practicing and Taehyung is... eating.

They browse through the racks at the grocery store you first met at.

Taehyung, being the more romantic one of the lot, provided him with a fairly large list of date ideas and Jungkook resonated with the one where he'd take you to the grocery store where he can buy you whatever you wanted and would cook with you.

He knows you enjoy baking and French and Italian pastry and dessert, he did not have enough time to conjure up baking skills nor did he want you to end up doing all the work. Something quick and easy would be more ideal.

"I just know you're going to go back to pasta." Taehyung whistles. He pops a grape into his mouth when nobody's watching.

"I mean, it is versatile and, ya know, pretty simple to prepare... and stuff..." Jungkook pouts.

"Delicious but basic." Taehyung reiterates.

"Classic! Basic is an exaggeration, you're just snooty." Jungkook teases.

"Hey, hey, I'm a man of- of fine calibre. Pasta is good, great even, but when YOU try to make pasta without enough knowledge, on a first date that too? You're already making her do all the work and what if it sucks?"

Jungkook smiles, "That's when I offer her my huge and fat collection of takeaway menus."

"And waste her time." Taehyung continues.

"It's not- it is time we might spend talking to each other!" With that, Jungkook pushes the shopping cart filled with items, half of which he doesn't intend to buy, further into the fresh produce section.

He ponders real hard in a futile attempt at thinking of a perfect dish that he can execute and that which impresses you.

Taehyung catches up to him, "Yo."

"Yo."

"Hear me out... sandwich."

"Absolutely not." Jungkook waves him off.

"Fish! Halibut, with the crispy potato scales!"

"Oh, yes! Halibut!" Jungkook exclaims, deadpan.

"Cereal?" He sighs.

"No, that's for our second date." Jungkook smiles. "The morning after." He winks, playfully.

"You're a pig." Taehyung fakes disgust.

"Well, hello there." Jungkook spots the long, green sticks in a bunch.

"Asparagus...?"

"Yeah!"

"Didn't you tell me _____ was a picky eater?"

...

"Yeah, alright, let's keep looking."

After thirty more minutes of browsing and window shopping, Taehyung takes notice of the weird dude following him and Jungkook around.

"Jungkook, this is weird. We've been in here for over an hour, I swear the boss man has asked that blonde employee to keep an eye on us." He traces his eyes to the corner. Then, said employee abruptly kneels on the ground and begins counting the mushrooms before him.

"Hm? He's just stocking up." Jungkook states unsuspectingly, making Taehyung squint his eyes in disbelief. "You-" He pokes the centre of his chest, "Are strange." Jungkook softly groans.

Taehyung lets out another involuntary sigh, internally skimming through the various cuisines he's had before. "Do you think she'll like salmon?"

"Doesn't it make your breath smell? I want to be able to kiss her."

"Ki- okay." The dark haired man sighs. "Actually." It hits him, "Why don't you make an obento? You know how to work with those Japanese flavours, hell, make it Korean! You can, like, include a variety of food that way."

"Yeah?"

"Sure! Or maybe a hot pot?"

Jungkook's face twists up dubiously.

"JK, it's better to do something you already know. She'll appreciate it."

Jungkook considers the suggestion. He thinks it might work. He has made it with Yuna before, she seemed to love it. Taehyung loves it. He reckons he can't go wrong with something Taehyung approves of.

"That... might actually work well." He drags his words out. "Huh. Okay. Obento and hotpot, it is!"

Soon after, they buy all the required ingredients and extra snacks for Taehyung. On Jungkook.

On the drive back home, Taehyung's curiosity is through the roof. He doesn't remember the last time his best friend was interested in anyone for more than a one time date or hook up.

"Have you spoken to Yuu about it?"

"I have, yeah. I mean I told her, that I like _____. Seeing her that day at the store, I swear, it lit something inside me. It's like love at first sight. It's real! I watched this video the other day- this doctor, I think it was a doctor. She studied love or something." His eyes widen in recollection, "Biological anthropologist!"

"She explained the whole 'love at first sight' phenomenon. It's a romantic attraction that is born because this person checks out all the qualities you look for, consciously or subconsciously."

Jungkook opens his mouth, waiting for Taehyung to feed him a matcha Pocky.

"Thanks."

"So, an... alarm went off because you suddenly realised that you saw someone who you deemed to be your type?" Taehyung tries to understand his friend.

"To be honest, I think you and _____ are pretty spot on. It's perfect. Textbook love story."

"Ah... I- I don't know." Jungkook stutters, visibly blushing upon Taehyung's implication.

Taehyung inwardly thought the same thing as Jungkook when he first met you. You and Jungkook complete eachother. Taehyung felt an intense pull towards you as well.

His happiness for his friend was almost too hard to contain.

"I don't want to be cheesy right now, so I'll just pause this conversation and resume when we're not in traffic."

"But," He continues, "You look happy."

Jungkook simpers, "I am, hyung."

His use of the endearing, Korean term makes Taehyung smile twice as wide.

[wildhannimal]

Negotiation tips!

When you are faced with a situation that involves some kind of bartering, like for a salary or a car price etc., it is scary to feel like you have to stick up for yourself and get the best deal you can but also keep the transaction neutral/positive and not look like a fool for asking too much. Most people deserve better than they realize because low-mid income people are taught that accepting whatever offer comes means they are being grateful and humble. You probably deserve — and can get — a better outcome than you realize.

1. Research. What is the thing you are negotiating, and what is the market rate for similar things? Search on websites like Glassdoor or Kelly Blue Book or e-marketplaces like Craigslist to get a rough range of the market rate. Note what factors affect the resulting price/pay. Maybe a job is paid better for workers with a certain skill, or maybe a car is worth much less than you’d think when it has slight hail damage. In addition to online research, ask friends, family, coworkers or anyone else who has experience with this kind of transaction. Ask what went well, what they regret, and if they would do something differently.

Note: Keep in mind you will never be able to know truly how the other person will respond to your offer/counter or what they expect until you’re in the moment, but going through this process can help you be so much more confident in asking for more than you might originally expect. Or at least more realistically plan your finances or anything else the deal will affect.

2. Determine your benchmarks. Set a number for your ideal price/wage. This is the number that is realistic (but on the high end) based on your research. You would be thrilled if they agreed to this number. Next, set a separate number for the “if it’s not this amount I can’t make the deal” figure. This is the threshold where you would be close to breaking even (mid to low end based on research), so it’s better to find someone else who can offer what you want at a better rate. Next, figure out the midpoint between those two numbers. Once you negotiate, aim for your ideal figure, but try not to go lower than your midpoint.

3. Make your offer as potentially attractive as possible. For negotiating a salary/raise, this could mean having 3-5 major successes beyond the job description ready to mention to say “here’s the concrete value I bring to the team.” For a real estate sale, your agent can help you ID opportunities like raising the deposit or waiving contingency. For a car sale, it might be offering a larger percentage in cash upfront than what is requested. The goal is to help the other party understand that your deal is a win-win. Don’t bring these out right away, though — only if you need them to inch them toward your ideal figure. Again, reach out to people you trust who can help you realize your own strengths or find opportunities to boost your position. Heck yeah, you should get a fair deal!

4. Review your alternative options. Think of your plan B and plan C. Other jobs? Other sellers? Waiting a while for something else to come on the market? If this deal doesn’t meet your minimum requirements, don’t let yourself get sucked into the moment. When you feel like this is your only option, or even the only option that will be this good ever, you’re more likely to negotiate from a place of desperation. Don’t get me wrong, sometimes desperation is a real situation and it’s not really feasible to follow this whole negotiation game. If you have a serious need, do what you can to get that need fulfilled. But if you have a bit of leeway, lean on that. Be confident before you begin that you don’t need this specific deal. If they can’t offer your midpoint figure or heck even your least favorable benchmark, make sure you will feel empowered to walk away. Research or have a clear picture in your mind of what these alternative realities would involve.

5. Choose your language deliberately. Use safety nets of stock phrases. Negotiation is not comfortable for many people. This is why boring corporate lingo exists: to hide discomfort, give an air of neutrality and manufacture objectivity. Depending on the negotiation, appearing very genuine and personal can really only be a good thing if you’re strategically appealing to the other party’s empathy. But in most deals, this can potentially backfire if the other party doesn’t sympathize with your situation. Plan to draw upon language that shows you are firm but reasonable, friendly but direct, and still ready to look for alternative deals elsewhere if needed. Here are some phrases that have actually worked wonders for me and people I know:

“I am considering deals at ____[amount] and above/below. Is this figure in your ballpark?” When they ask you for you to throw out the first number, this lets you say your ideal number without any wishy-washing! You are firm. You know what you want and deserve. You give them a chance to also express their expectations.

If they say no, you can follow up with: “Out of curiosity, what are your expectations?” You don’t have to commit to lowering to that point, but this gives them the same chance to express where they are. This is when they might tell you a budget cap or give a counter offer. After: “Thanks for sharing more about your expectations.”

If their counter is much less favorable than anticipated, this is when you bring out #3. Sweeten the deal: “Would ___[amount] be more favorable for you if ____[perk]?” Or speak to your strengths: “I evaluated this figure based on my recent performance, such as ____[successes].” Mention your research and reaffirm that you believe it is a fair price or indicate which price you could meet them at.

“Okay, is this your best and final offer?” When they’ve given you a counter, or you’ve had some back and forth in friendly negotiation, this is a good way to wrap up. It can make it sound like you have other offers on the table. No joke, this line helped me double my raise last month. I still feel all chuffed about it, clearly lol. No additional pressure needed. It just puts the onus on them to consider how attached they are to this deal and reassess what they’re willing to commit to it. It helps you make sure there’s no more value on the table. It lets them know that you are done with the back and forth and want to cut through the bs — but in a formal way that they wouldn’t have reason to take offense to. Ask in a friendly but neutral tone — unbothered but authentic — neither harsh nor overly eager. Again, we’re going for that objectivity vibe. It’s like putting on a poker face. I know this feels very performative, and it IS a performance. That’s why it can be so nerve-wracking. But knowing the dance steps will help you perform better. You got this!

“I’d like to take a day to consider this figure and let you know as soon as I’ve reached a decision.” I always ask for more time once an amount seems fairly final if it’s not the figure I was expecting or hoping for. But also consider how urgent the deal really is. Is it a hot housing market? You might not be able to afford extra time, so it’s much more important to stick to your initial benchmarks so you can be ready to lock in the deal right away. If it’s a job offer, it’s rarely ever that urgent and taking a day is expected. If you just aren’t getting good vibes from the deal or other party, asking for more time is probably wise even if it risks the deal falling apart. Just use this one carefully.

Okay! It’s super late and I have to go to bed, but if you have to negotiate something I hope this gives you a starting point at least! You can do it! You are most likely worth more than you realize or have more room to get a more favorable outcome than you think!

[fuxkingmarvel]

Party Favors

Summary: Cops are called after a noise complaint. The town’s sheriff arrives at your Halloween Party.

Pairing: Modern Day Lee Bodecker x Reader

Warnings: smut, oral sex (male), degrading language, manipulation, age gap (reader is 20)

Parents gone for the weekend.

What better way to celebrate Halloween? It’s a small town and your house was the ideal place for a party!

“Are you okay?” You questioned as your best friend pointed to the window.

“Hello... don’t tell me you’re hiding from your ex” you laughed trying to lighten the mood as she shook her head.

“No. Worse. I think someone called the cops” Your friend bit her lip, as she grabbed her purse.

“Look, I don’t need to get some ticket by the sheriff. I think I’m just going to head out before he comes.” You sighed lightly at your friends words.

Great! Leave me here with this mess, even though you helped plan the damn party.

Before you knew it, the siren of the sheriff’s cop car alerted everyone. Some of the less drunken students got the memo and began to scatter away. While others, truly didn’t give a damn.

You groaned lightly, peeking through the blinds of the window to see Sheriff Bodecker exit his car.

You watched as he walked with confidence towards your front door. Your eyes roaming him from top to bottom. He could definitely manhandle you if he wanted. Clearly, he was way too old for you.

But god, did he look good in a uniform.

“We meet again, Miss Y/N. You know I thought after your first year in college, you would have learned your lesson” Bodecker explained but the only thing you could concentrate on was the way his tongue played with the toothpick in his mouth.

Your eyes fixacted on the other ways he could put his tongue into use.

“Y/N”

You try to hide your blush before meeting his eyes. “Sorry Sheriff... What’s the problem here?” You question shyly, your arms crossed as you lean against your front door.

He licked his lips, his eyes roaming your body lingering a little too long on your breasts. Maybe that was your fault as you decided to dress up as a sexy devil, the outfit exentuating your breasts dangerously so.

He chuckles dramatically. “You drunk, darlin’... because that’s a stupid question if you ask me”. You choke on his words, your face feeling hot.

“Got a noise complaint. It is Halloween after all.” Lee casually states, stepping in close as he tries to peek into your house. His hands press on your hips and you could smell his cologne.

“Mind if I check the premise” He raises an eyebrow. “Unless you’re hiding something from me...” You shake your head, widening your door, as your house is now empty. The last stranglers leaving through the back door.

Lee steps inside. Empty red cups carelessly thrown on the rug and table. Busted beer cars on the side. Even accessories from people’s outfits are on the floor. He shakes his head as he kicks the can.

“Quite some party you had, darlin” You cross your legs from the way his new nickname for you, rolls off his tongue.

“Now, where is he?” You furrow your eyebrows, watching Lee’s movements as he enters the kitchen. He places his sheriff hat on the counter. You follow behind him.

“Who?”

“Your boyfriend.”

You start to clean up the cans off the floor. Embarrassed by the mess from the party. “In my dreams” you simply state, laughing nervously as you dump the cans into a garbage bag.

Lee walks behind you, trapping you between the kitchen counter. He lifts your chin up, his blue eyes boring into yours. Goosebumps shooting up on your skin.

“Now, don’t lie to me” his voice becomes lower and rougher. “Someone has to be takin’ good care of this cunt. Maybe Arvin Russell... he’s about your age” You gasp at his words, your body becoming tense as you fingers wrap around the marbel counter.

Lee spreads your thighs in an instant, his slight hard on throbbing against you.

“I leave you with too many warnings. I think this time, you return the favor” he smirks slyly, his thumb stroking your cheek and then your lips. You open your mouth slightly and Lee pushes his thumb inside. Your tongue swirling around him as his eyebrows jump up in suprise and a smirk grows on your face.

You weren’t expecting this for the night, but you craved Bodecker for the longest.

Always imagined how he tasted, how good he was in bed. Lee was right. He gave you multiple warnings throughout your college years. Your friends stating the Sheriff had a weird secret obsession with you.

“He’s a sad lonely fuck, Y/N! His wife left him and now he probably jerks off into Pepsi Cups to the thought of you!” You shook your head and covered your ears. “Guys stop! You don’t know what you’re talking about” Your friends scoffed at your foolishness.

Lee palms himself lightly as you suck on his thumb. Before you knew it, you were popping off his thumb and ready to suck something bigger. You bit your lip in hesitation before sinking down on the hardwood floor. The outline of his cock pushing against his trousers.

“Don’t act like you didn’t want this for the longest. I see the way you look at me. Come on, take out my cock, darlin. Play with it.” He breaths in deeply as his hands find their way through your hair.

You fumble with his zipper before pulling him out, your eyes widening at the size. Holy shit... Lee’s eyes darken, grabbing his cock and dragging it against your lips before he uses his cock to slap your cheek. You moan in ecstasy as His pre-cum smears on your lips. You lick your lips before gently sucking on his tip.

Lee groans roughly before pushing himself in your mouth. You whimper lightly as his hand grips your hair pulling it into a makeshift ponytail.

It felt good but so wrong. Your knees digging into your floor as you gave a blowjob to your Town’s sheriff. Nevertheless, you pumped the rest of his shaft but Lee wanted more. He starts finding a frantic rythm causing you to gag.

“Fuck—! You like my big cock.. better than these college boys! Yeah, it is!” He praised thrusting in and out of your mouth as he threw his head back in pleasure. “Just like that, taking my cock like a good little whore” His cock hitting the back of your throat with each thrust, as tears ran down your eyes.

“I always knew you were good for something darlin’, gunna cum in that pretty mouth and you’re going to fuckin’ swallow it all” You whimpered at his words. Your mouth being used as his personal fuck toy.

He rolled his eyes back getting closer to his release before pulling out of you. Your appearance was messy. Mascara running down your face. Your saliva and his pre-cum connecting from your lips to his cock. You looked up at him panting softly, your thighs rubbing against yourself wishing they could get their own release.

“Stick your tongue out, gunna paint your mouth and face” he spat, as he pumped himself fast you opened your mouth fully.

“Fuck— I’m cumming!” His release falling onto your tongue and face. You swallowed him all, even dragging your fingers across your cheeks and sucking on any last remnants of his cum.

You stood up quickly, your nails raking over his body. You wanted more. Kiss him. Have him touch you.

Anything.

Lee stroked your cheek lazily, looking at you with lustful eyes.

“My turn?” You dared to ask, tilting your head as you gave him innocent eyes. You leaned in to kiss him but he pushed you back by your hips.

“What—?”

“This is your punishment, darlin” he put his half softening cock back into his boxers, lifting up his trousers and zipping himself up. He grabbed his sherrif hat from the counter and placed it on his head. You whined lightly at his actions following him like a little puppy.

“That’s not fair-! You can’t just—“ you huffed dramatically. Your hormones spiking up with each move.

“Shit, don’t be so dramatic” he slapped your ass roughly before casually heading to your living room. You gasped stopping in your tracks. His cocky attitude peeking through.

“Now I don’t wanna hear another complaint, or Sheriff Bodecker will have to come back again and teach you another lesson.”

“Oh— And Happy Halloween.” He winked at you before striding out your house like nothing had ever happened.

[peachyteabuck]

Hey lukis I hope its okay to ask I was wondering if you have any tips/advice for moving out for the very first time from living with your parents cause I've been working and saving up to move out on my own (cause I hate it here everyday istg) and im so happy now im old enough too I'm just lowkey so nervous to move out on my own because well it's all so new and all but I just really have to leave this home (hell) I'm stuck in

Like I just want my apartment and to be happier living there even if I'm alone because at least I'll be way happier than living with my own family who are well transphobic assholes and I just hate it here so much:(( it sucks.

full disclosure i am answering this on my floor because i don't want to go into another part of my apartment lol

biggest thing: i don't think you'll be living alone for a long while. at least in the U.S., living alone is expensive as hell, and landlords might raise standards for approving your apartment. plan on having roommate(s)

there are larger, more comprehensive lists but here's 10 things i wish someone told me before i moved out at 18:

1. adulting takes up way more time than everyone told you. trash & laundry & dishes accumulate quicker, something always needs to be cleaned.

2. everything costs so much fucking money. when you're moving out, you're started from SCRATCH. best advice is to not spend too much. ask around, people usually have extras of stuff they're willing to give away. also, dumpster diving/trash picking is usually worth it. it's where i got my tv AND tv stand. also local no buy groups on facebook

3. have copies of everything. birth certificate, social security card, any other necessary paperwork. keep originals in one place (ideally secure fireproof box), and keep copies in another place. this includes your leases, too.

4. you're going to need to relearn how to do things. did you know you can do dishes SITTING DOWN? or do laundry at the couch while watching tv? or buy a giant pack of paper plates to keep urself with because dishes are hard? i didn't.

5. set boundaries. & stick to them. i have an easy time expressing boundaries with others but the hardest time setting them for myself

6. make friends with people who are smarter than you. keeps you humble and they're the ones to make sure you're on the right track.

7. getting involved with stuff is the best way to make friends. this is easier if you're at school, but there's always stuff around cities and towns.

8. get a hobby you don't intend on monetizing. you do in fact need something to think about besides money

9. if you want a pet, keep at least $3,000 in an emergency fund. some people say $1,500 is ideal but honestly double it

10. daily walks are good for your health. sometimes you gotta put on a silly little podcast and walk aimlessly around your city and buy yourself a little treat from a grocery store with a cat for a manager. personally i'm listening to american scandal and love jarritos.

[lazyliars]

The Quackity Meta: Justice without the Blindfold

[Anonymous asks: (DSMP) Somebody talk to me about Quackity and Eret’s character. I wanna talk about what Quackity’s views on power are with what he’s planning to do with Sam along with whatever he saw in the egg. I wanna talk about why Eret thinks reviving Wilbur is the best option for the sever to lead and their views on what a leader should be with them being the king of the Dream SMP. I wanna talk about Quackity planning to create a casino for the server to rise to the top. What does it mean to be king?]

[/rp. All mentions of dream smp members should be assumed as referencing the character, not the cc, unless specifically stated otherwise.]

At the heart of every conflict, if you look closely enough, you will find a similarity. Two contrasting ideals will reveal their own likeness, in the stage they play out their war – they both fight for the same result; to be known and followed and asserted, and in this they are the same. There would be no conflict if both sides shared nothing in common.

Lets talk about Quackity.

We'll gloss over a good deal of Quackity's history to get to the meat of this discussion, which involves Technoblade. But there are a a few lesser known facts about Quackity's early days on the server that are relevant to the discussion, like  that Quackity joined the server because of Tommy.

Namely, he joined for The Cartel, a short-lived organization comprised of him, Tommy, Tubbo and Jack Manifold, and their aims of obtaining power over the entire server by getting a monopoly on one object, the Phantom Membrane.

(Trivia: This is why Technoblade had to strike a deal with Tommy for the membranes – Phantoms are turned off on the Dream SMP now, so their monopoly actually ended up working. (Un)fortunately, Tommy traded nearly his whole supply for the priceless act of... making Techno scream really loud and talk in a funny voice. Worth it.)

However, Tommy's interest in the Cartel waned almost immediately, to Quackity's frustration. Tommy was constantly busy with his Vice Presidential duties in L'manberg. Quackity wasn't entirely left out, and he helped Tommy on multiple occaisions, but this was back in Wilbur's L'manberg, where non-europeans were strictly banned.

Quackity would slowly come to resent Tommy for this over time. He joined the server to be with him, took his side in nearly every conflict, including the ones that were L'manberg-oriented, and yet he wasn't allowed to be a citizen of his friend's own nation.

The resentment would reach a boiling point when Quackity discovered Wilbur's bid to consolidate power by running a sham election – with a one party system. Quackity challenged him, formed Swag 2020, and the rest is history...

The takeaway here is that from the start, Quackity has been shunted aside by people in power – Tommy, Wilbur, and then later, Schlatt. This wouldn't prevent him from executing his own immoral power grabs, but that trait – the distaste for people with power holding it over him, is one that would stick around, and become even more prominent later... Quackity has more reason than most to hate tyranny.

But “Tyranny” Is a word thrown around on the SMP often enough, that it's probably up there with “betrayal” and “pop-off” in total wordcount. But few use it more commonly, or more persuasively, than Quackity and Technoblade.

This begs the question: what is Tyranny in a M/inec/raft role play, and why do Quackity and Technoblade both detest it so much while still hating each other?

Well, after a moderate amount of research, I have discovered the following:

Tyranny is complicated.

Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk.

...No, but really. Tyranny is very old concept. The words originates in, you guessed it, Ancient Greece, but conceptually, the idea goes waaaay back.

Now, that last thing I wanna do is give anyone a history lesson. I'd suck at it and I haven't done that much research. But the takeaway here is that “Tyranny” has come to be defined in fairly vague terms. We'll look at a few different ones in reference to the SMP.

Oxford dictionary defines a Tyrant as: A cruel and oppressive ruler. / a person exercising power or control in a cruel, unreasonable, or arbitrary way. / (especially in ancient Greece) a ruler who seized power without legal right.

Lets look at the first and last definitions:  A cruel and oppressive ruler; (especially in ancient Greece) a ruler who seized power without legal right.

By these definitions, one could call Quackity tyrannical during his term as Tubbo's VP. He exercises the power granted to him as a government official to spearhead an operation to execute a man without trial. He violently invades the home of a citizen and then puts said man on house arrest, and to subdue the target of this operation he threatens a pet (-a vague but ostensibly severe criminal act in the terms of m/inec/raft specifically-) and then reveals to Techno that the reason he's doing this actually has nothing to do with the crime Techno was accused of, and it is instead a ploy to consolidate power.

Quackity is leveraging his position in the government to amass power, and using that power to harm individuals (Philza and Techno,) in process. As an added bonus, his position in that government came from usurping Schlatt, a legitimately elected official. Thus, Quackity is a Tyrant.

But there, in Schlatt's government is where things get complicated.

Quackity had some power in Schlatt's government. Not the same kind as he did in New L'manberg, but arguably a more unrestrained form – Quackity could basically do whatever he wanted, as long as it pleased Schlatt. In New L'manberg, Quackity needed to convince not only Tubbo, but the rest of the cabinet whenever he wanted to initiate a new project. New L'manberg, while still maintaining a ruling class, had a far more equal distribution of power than Manberg did. It was still democratic.

And while we're on the topic of Quackity as Schlatt's VP, Quackity had almost instant regret the day of the election. He was undermining Schlatt from the start, questioning him, trying to stop Tubbo from breaking the signs that read “if you break this sign, you hate your viewers” and freeing Niki when Schlatt trapped her in Jack Manifold's house and then whispering at her to run.

Quackity only fell into step with Schlatt in the aftermath of Election day, when he saw a major desire fulfilled; the tearing down of L'manberg's walls. These walls were a symbol of L'manberg's isolationist roots that prevented Quackity from joining in the first place. It was one of his biggest promises whilst campaigning.

From this point on, up until the festival, Quackity would be in support of Schlatt. The things he did try to push back on would be downplayed and ignored, if not scorned. This period of time is difficult to pick apart where Quackity's personal morals and ideals begin, and Schlatt's influence ends. The steadily worsening abusive dynamic between them doesn't help this vagueness, either.

I point this out because I've seen people conflate Quackity's abuse at the hands of Schlatt, and his willingness to participate in Schlatt's rule as being of the same root; implying that Quackity only followed Schlatt because he was in an abusive relationship with him, when the reality is far more complicated. Yes, their relationship was a major factor in Quackity's actions, but downplaying his ambition and willingness to accept Schlatt's Tyranny when it helped him realize his own goals does a disservice to the nuance of Manberg-era Quackity.

What all of this points to is an individual who has a strong, some might say defining sense of Justice, yet also a susceptibility to Temptation. Quackity’s experiences with disenfranchisement by Wilbur and Tommy, coupled with his Dark horse victory in the election paints him in a sympathetic, even heroic light. But the way he slowly relinquished more and more power to Schlatt, and ended up indulging in the fruits of tyrannical gains when they proved they could get him what he wanted.

...

So, back to the question... Is Quackity a tyrant?

The answer to that question is a solid “mmmmaaaybe??”

It comes back to what you consider Tyranny. Quackity has never held complete power – he has always, always been scrapping and struggling and fighting to get a foothold in the machinations of the truly powerful, like Dream and Wilbur. He's very much an underdog story.

On the other hand, the times that Quackity has held positions of power, he's done some questionable shit. People like to forget that, while he was deeply disturbed by it, he wasn't exactly against Tubbo's execution at the festival. Putting Phil on house arrest and executing Techno without trial also count against him.

Like most things on the SMP, it's just complicated. Quackity's motivations run deep and aren't always obvious. He doesn't seem to want to hurt people just for the sake of hurting them, or use his power in arbitrary ways, but when he can personally justify it, the sacrifice of his moral integrity gets severe sometimes.

What it looks like is that more than anything else, Quackity wants control, and to never, ever lose his own autonomy. That is also why he despises Technoblade.

...And here we are at the Technoblade part of this meta, AKA the MASSIVE BULK OF THIS ANALYSIS. Which you can read HERE, because it’s too long to fit in just this one post.

[be11atrixthestrange]

According To The Stars

Be11a writes Jily Fluff! Read here or on AO3

*******

According To The Stars

While working on Divination homework, James learns something new about Lily. Good thing Divination is a load of rubbish... or is it?

*******

James wasn't sure if he believed in Divination, or if it was just a load of rubbish. Honestly, one of the only reasons he was still taking the subject was the company — it was on Lily Evans' sixth-year timetable, and therefore his.

His friends had dropped the subject, and they made sure to take the mickey out of him when he signed back up.

"Divination, really James?"

"Why take that when you could have a free period?"

"Is it the subject matter that fascinates you, or is it a certain redhead?"

The questions were rhetorical, and his friends knew that. They were perfectly aware of James' motivation for sticking around in Divination, and they knew that he preferred they weren't there. Not many students continued beyond their O.W.L. year in the subject, and James was happy that Lily was the only other student he knew well. He could assure they would always be partnered up for projects, and he didn't have to worry about anyone swooping in and stealing her attention from him. Not Remus, Sirius, Peter, or worst of all, Snivellus.

James was procrastinating on his Divination essay in the Gryffindor common room when Lily approached him.

"Have you started?" she asked.

"Not yet, I was waiting for you. I was hoping you could help."

"You're smart, you'll figure it out," she said as she took a seat at the table beside him. "It's just a birth chart, anyway."

Just a birth chart. The problem wasn't that James thought birth charts were difficult to understand; it was that he hated the idea of them. The fact that the date, location, and time of his birth supposedly determined his fate really bothered him.

Earlier in class, they had mapped out their star signs, and their homework was to analyze them. He had been feeling a pit of dread all day, simply because he'd have to dive into all of the details of his future. He truly didn't want to know what the stars had to say about his life. In James' opinion, there was no point in knowing how or when he might die, who his future wife would be, how many kids he would have, or what he would do for an occupation. It sucked all of the excitement right out of life and stripped him of his autonomy. He wanted to believe that his choices mattered.

He knew he should take it all with a grain of salt because humans could never fully understand the truth of the stars. Predictions were wrong all the time, and there were always going to be flaws in human methods of telling the future.

But the mere idea that James' future was set in stone made him deeply uncomfortable. Like his friends, he could simply choose not to believe in any of it, but the problem was that he sort of did.

He looked over to see that Lily had already started her essay and was scribbling furiously on her parchment. Reluctantly, he turned back to his own star chart and began writing too.

My name is James Potter, and I was born at 5:45 pm on Sunday, March 27th, 1960, in London, England.

This makes my Sun Sign Aries, my Moon Sign Aries, and my Ascendant Libra.

Sun Sign: Aries

The sun determines our ego, identity, and 'role' in life. It's the core of who we are. On my birthdate — Sunday, March 27th, 1960 — my Sun was in Aries.

I am fundamentally assertive, persistent, and courageous. Naturally competitive and fiercely independent, I push things forward with energy and enthusiasm. I am determined, and I persevere through anything.

James thought back to his time on the Quidditch Pitch, where he would do anything for a victory. He was a risk-taker with a deep desire to win, and that had landed him in the Hospital Wing more times than he'd care to admit. He was definitely independent — although he played Chaser on the Gryffindor team, he much preferred the solitary aspect of Seeker; when playing Chaser, his fellow teammates often badgered him for being a "Quaffle-Hog".

I need to learn to understand other people as complex wholes.

The analysis felt spot-on for James. People were like puzzles, and he enjoyed figuring them out. All-day, James had been riddled with curiosity about Lily's birth chart. He was planning to ask her about it tonight and was excited to get to know her on a deeper level.

I feel the need to distinguish myself from others.

James felt exposed by that one. He was a prankster; he enjoyed his popularity, and he often engaged in what others — mainly professors — would call "attention-seeking behavior." Touche, birth chart, he thought, as he carried on writing.

Moon Sign: Aries

The moon rules our emotions, moods, and feelings, reflecting our personalities when we're alone and comfortable. On my birthdate — Sunday, March 27th, 1960 — my Moon was in Aries.

My emotional self is independent, energetic, and enthusiastic. I have a tendency to feel inadequate and overcompensate just because failure is a possibility.

That one hurt a bit. James immediately felt defensive as he wrote it, but deep down, he knew it was true. As the only son of a well-known and successful family, failure was not an option. He was no stranger to pressure, and sometimes he overcompensated. He was a smart kid, but he often relied on his charm to build connections and network. He knew his smooth-talking could drive some people — mostly Lily — insane, but it was nothing more than a defense mechanism because he truly was terrified of failure.

I find security and safety through close relationships and long-term partnerships.

James held his friends close, and had no idea what he would do without them. He believed they would all be there for him for the rest of his life, and he couldn't entertain the idea that they might not. He would risk his life to protect his friends, and they'd do the same for him. According to his analysis, whether or not his overwhelming trust in others was a strength or a weakness was open to interpretation, and James chose to see it as a good thing. What was the point of life without friends, anyway? He smiled warmly at the thought and continued.

Ascendant: Libra

Our Ascendant is the "mask" we present to people. It can be seen in our personal style and our first impressions. Some say its relevance fades as we age. Our Ascendant is determined by our time of birth — I was born at 5:45 pm, meaning my Ascendant is Libra.

I come across as compromising, courteous, and impartial, though sometimes passive-aggressive.

For most people, he was a compromising and courteous individual, at least for people he liked. Unfortunately, passive-aggressive was a no-brainer as well. Some folks — particularly Snivellus — might say he was a bully. In detention, he'd received lectures about how pranking and cursing others was not the proper way to alleviate interpersonal issues. McGonagall never hesitated to tell him that a calm and rational discussion would be much more effective than a Levicorpus Charm. Admittedly, his methods could be considered passive-aggressive.

I am inclined towards balance.

James was a well-rounded fellow, that was for sure. He was an academic, an athlete, and he maintained a social life quite effortlessly. Balance truly was important to him. There was just one part missing from his ideal balance — a relationship. More specifically, a relationship with Lily.

In fact, that missing piece was one of the first things he looked for when he began his birth chart analysis. On a separate piece of parchment, he had scribbled down a few signs — Aquarius, Sagittarius, Leo, and Gemini. According to the stars, his ideal life partner's Sun, Moon, and Ascendant signs should fall into these categories. Part of him didn't want to know what Lily's chart said, and the rest of him needed to. It could all be rubbish, but maybe it wasn't.

"What are your signs, Lily?"

"Why do you want to know?" she asked.

"Research," he said.

"You want to know my fate?"

"You could say that," he responded. It was partially true — he wanted to know what the stars said about her life, but specifically her compatibility with him.

Lily sighed. "My Sun Sign is Aquarius."

James' stomach fluttered with excitement. Aquarius was one of his most compatible signs, so that was a good start. "And your Moon Sign?"

"Pisces."

He tried not to let the disappointment show on his face. Nowhere on his chart did it say he should look for someone with a Pisces Moon Sign. "What about your Ascendant?"

James froze in anticipation, hoping for Lily to say one of the four options. Two of three compatible signs would make them a decent match.

"Virgo."

His stomach sank. One out of three matching signs wasn't ideal. Sure, it could work, but it meant that Lily wouldn't be his perfect partner. If he were to believe the stars, there was someone else out there that was better suited to him, and he wasn't sure if he wanted that to be true.

"Are you okay?" asked Lily.

James tried his best to smile and mask his fallen expression. He was okay; he just really wished Lily's astrological signs were fully compatible with his, but he didn't feel like he could tell her that. At least not straight-up.

"Do you believe in all of this?" he asked instead.

"Divination?"

"Yeah, but more specifically, this birth chart stuff. Do you believe that this should determine your future? Your personality, your jobs, and who you should be with?"

"Who I should be with?" she asked, her eyes moving to his parchment. She was squinting, and James wondered if she was trying to read his chart. "What are your signs?"

He hesitated before answering. What if she really did believe in all of it, and learning how lukewarm their compatibility was just turned her away? He knew he couldn't get away without telling her, so he took a deep breath and responded. "Aries, Aries, Libra."

Lily didn't say anything at first, and the pit grew in James' stomach the longer she was quiet.

"Lily?" he asked after she'd been silent for a few seconds too long for comfort. "What do you believe?"

"Honestly?" she said. "I believe it's a load of rubbish. At least I hope it is. What about you?"

He felt a wave of relief at her words. "Good. I think it's rubbish too, and I hope we're right."

She smiled at him, and he grinned back, the heat rising to his cheeks. They turned to their essays and began writing again. There was a little bounce in their quills, a mark of the excitement between two teenagers who just — sort of — admitted something big.

James felt better knowing that whatever his birth chart said about his future, his choices did matter. Sure, the stars might have a plan for him, but if they didn't involve the cute Aquarius beside him, he'd happily choose not to believe any of it.

[dbtskills]

[Image has the biohazard symbol on a yellow background with text that reads Staying Sane While Quarantined]

So, shit has hit the fan and pretty much wherever you are, COVID-19 is too. Grocery store shelves are empty and people are getting sent home from work by the droves. If you’ve been instructed to work from home, temporarily unemployed, or are under literal quarantine, these tips can help you maintain your mental health in these trying times.

1. Cope Ahead

If you haven’t been quarantined yet and have time to prepare for staying at home, cope ahead. Coping ahead is figuring out what vulnerabilities you might face and planning how you’re going to deal with them. Do you struggle with loneliness? Are you quarantined with someone you fight with? Do you often feel bored? Do you have eating issues? Ask yourself these types of questions. Each answer is a vulnerability that you need to address. Many of the following items will help you do so.

Note: if you have eating issues, make sure to stock your pantry with items you will actually eat, not aspirational foods. If you’re left at home with nothing you’re willing to eat you’re in big trouble. QUARANTINE IS NOT AN EXCUSE TO USE BEHAVIORS!

2. Have An Activity Arsenal

Make sure you have plenty of stuff to do. If you’re able to work from home, awesome, that’ll use some of your empty time. Gather all the usuals: books, movies, comics, tv shows. Dive deeper down on your watchlists/readlists. Have any hobbies? Go back to whatever you used to do before life got too busy. Go back to drawing, finish that sweater you were knitting. Or try something new! Learn to crochet! Do a puzzle! Some of this takes planning and resources but you can also download apps that let you color or try your hand at graphic design or zine-making.

Once you’ve determined the things you CAN do, put them all on a list and stick that bad boy on your fridge so you can go to it when you’re feeling bored.

Note: the library has great resources for digital media. You can find shows/movies to watch as well as things to read online. Utilize those library cards to the max- they’re not just for physical books!

3. Make A Schedule

Specifically a sleep schedule. Quarantine may seem like the perfect opportunity to sleep your life away but your mental health will suffer if you don’t regulate your sleeping. Get up and go to sleep at the same time each day. Pencil in a modest nap.

If you can, schedule other things. I know that’s asking a lot though. But if you’re someone who feeds off the structure of life or school, all this empty time may destabilize your mental health. If that’s you, try to schedule sleep time and watch time and read time and social time. It’ll help I swear.

4. Have Patience

You may be quarantined with a roommate or a family that you don’t always get along with. If so, have as much patience as you can with them. They’re just as stir-crazy as you are. Avoid them if you’re getting fed up. If you fight, there’s really nowhere to escape to. Use your conflict resolution and interpersonal skills to the max.

Be patient the situation too. It’s not ideal. In fact it fucking sucks. But it’s the best way to protect yourself and those around you. Like really, science is all in on this one. You may feel confident in your ability to survive the virus, but what about your 80-year-old grandma or your immunocompromised cousin? We gotta protect them too. So post up and radically accept this shit.

Also be patient with yourself. This may seem like a great time to get that thing you’ve always been wanting to do done. And it can be! But you don’t need to be productive all the time. You don’t need to produce anything to make this time “worthwhile.” You’re allowed to just be. It’s most important to take care of yourself. If you’re really struggling against productivity, consider it productive to fight capitalism by doing nothing!

5. Be “Social”

Just because you’re isolated doesn’t mean you can’t be social. Call your family. FaceTime your friends. Do it every damn day. I know it’s not the same but it’s the best we’ve got right now. Schedule social time into each day and stick to it. This is a perfect opportunity to reach out to the people you’ve been meaning to for the past few months but haven’t. Call your grandpa. Call that friend from college you’ve been catching up with. Call a friend that you’re worried about. Even if you’re not feeling very social, it could make or save someone else’s day.

6. Write Down One Reason You’re Glad You’re Alive Every Day

It’s scientifically proven that expressing gratitude regularly can help improve your mood. It may be hard to come up with a whole daily list of reasons to be grateful when you’re quarantined during a pandemic. So let’s start small. Keep a list and every day add one reason you’re glad you’re alive. Think of it like Rey scratching a hashmark onto her wall for every day she’s been on Jakku. But like in a more positive way. Each reason is a day you’ve been quarantined but you may find yourself wanting to keep up the habit once this is all over. Even if it’s hard at first, you’ll find that you actually can come up with a reason a day. The truth is that the reasons are limitless. Just think of all the doggos out there left to pet!

[ramp-it-up]

No Stress

This is dedicated to @theatrenerd86​ (Happy Hump Day! ❤️)

Pairing: Lin-Manuel Miranda x Reader

Word count: 5.4 K

Warnings: 18+ Only (Cause it’s SMUT) Cursing; lil bit of Angst; lust within marriage; some fluff at the end.

Summary: Lin spends all day proving himself.

The dream was more like a memory. It was years ago, and Lin found himself on the other side of a shelf in your favorite bookstore/coffee shop overhearing your conversation with Evangeline, your best friend. You were talking about sex, and the lack thereof.

…”In answer to your question, Lin and I haven’t smashed. Yet. He’s such a fucking gentleman and it’s only been a three weeks, Eve.” He heard you suck your teeth. 

“Yea, but you all are out every other night and talk everyday.  You mean to tell me you haven’t climbed that pole yet? Girl.  Must be love or you’re really not interested, because you’re kind of a hoe.”

“I hate you Eve. Nah. I don’t know about Love.” 

Your voice turned wistful, like when you talked about what you wanted for the future with him. 

“But we just talk, for hours, and time just flies. And he makes me feel.  I dunno… He makes me feel.” 

Lin peeked through the books to see your face. Damn. So beautiful. He was sure you could hear his heart.

 “I’m interested.  If he just played it right, he could have been had these panties.  He doesn’t realize it, but he’s been about  three seconds from talking me into climbing on his face.”  Lin smiled to himself, mentally taking notes.

“We’ve kissed, and by the way he’s a damn good kisser, and felt each other up and I’m more than ready to see if what I feel is the real deal, if you know what I mean. But, he always pulls up and stops, not wanting to push it.  I’m like, violate me man!” 

You and Eva laughed as Lin blushed. So you wanted his junk. Score!

“But it’s not the size of the boat, it’s the motion in the ocean.  He’d have to do a lot to top Jason.  I think he will always be number one. He was a cheating asshole, but damn could he get me there.  Three times in one day. Holy shit!”

Lin peeked through the books to see you fanning yourself and observed the laughter between you and Evangeline.  What he’d heard was that you wanted him, but that he had some measuring up to do. It was intimidating.  

He took a couple of minutes to screw his courage to the sticking place and give your conversation time to move on. Then, he turned the corner to meet your best friend for the first time, a smile on his face. Of course he charmed the hell out of her.

And that night he was no gentleman.

_______

Lin woke up with a start, relieved to find you in his bed. He watched you sleeping, turned away and curled into a ball. He was feeling blessed, yet curious as to whether or not he’d topped Jason.  He’d never asked you about it, embarrassed for eavesdropping. 

You sighed and shifted, your shoulder moving back toward him and body falling more open.  Lin’s eyes followed your face and neck, down your collarbone to your chest and breast, nipple visible through your thin tank top. 

The year after your wedding was busy, with your career taking off and the success of his first production. You two settled into married life happily, yet everything was a mile a minute. Lin felt that he hadn’t taken the time to savor you.

As he faintly traced your nipple through your top, Lin was reminded of how when he first saw your breasts he was ruined, because they are of what his dreams are made. Not only were you his soulmate, you were his physical ideal. Fate had been kind to him.

Lin  became determined to be one of your Top 2 lovers of all time, and not number 2. The thought made him unbelievably hot and his cock grew rock hard. The plan formulated in his mind, and he hoped you could survive the journey. 

He kissed your shoulder as he pressed his erection into your beautiful ass, moving his hand down the curve of your stomach down toward your panties.

That was how Lin’s day began.  Insatiable.

-----

That there was “an important event” that evening. At least that’s what Lin told you.  Another awards/launch/benefit/speaking engagement thingy. You really didn’t want to go, because it was the middle of the week and you were tired. Especially today. 

For some reason, Lin seemed to be really into you that morning, waking you early, hand in your panties, making you cum twice before time to get ready.

Afterward, Lin came out of the shower just as you were slipping into your skirt. He stopped, leaning against the doorframe, water rolling down his body.  His look was still hungry as he eyed you from head to toe.  

You tried to keep your attention on the mirror as you attempted to put in your pearl stud earrings.  But he just stood there.  All wet and sexy and shit. Fuck. 

Your eyes followed a random water drop all the way from his shoulder to the dark hair of his happy trail.  You wondered about the path of that water as it traveled through the wiry, lush strands that pointed to joy.  Damn.  This was the meaning of thirst.

Lin watched your need for water and commented on your situation. “Should have joined me in the shower like I asked.”

“You just had some this morning.  What, you weren’t satisfied?”  You gave him your sassy look.

Lin quirked his eyebrow up a bit and then he gave you that look that, well, made you clench your thighs.

He smiled, leaned in and whispered in your ear.

“When it comes to that pretty little cunt, cariña. I’ll never be satisfied.”

“Lin-Manuel!”  You looked shocked and crossed your arms as your nipples got hard and you got wet again.  This man had you sprung.

As Lin gave you an evil grin, you swallowed and reluctantly moved your eyes up to his face. The look there was vaguely ominous.  

Lin  knew he had you. Your eyes were distracted again as you leaned against the dresser and watched as he untied his towel.  

He was semi-hard but his dick still bounced against his thigh, long and thick.  It was the most beautiful caramel color, you mused. You had to open your mouth for more air as he picked it up and started stroking himself.

“You coming or going, cariña?”

You smiled as you reached and took over the stroke.  

“I guess I can be a little late. Just… don’t get any on my shirt.”

“Then you probably need to take that shit off.”  

Your fingers went to the buttons on your shirt as you sat on the bed and Lin stood in front of you watching, stroking his caramel joy again. Then you got back to business. 

He grabbed your hair as you pumped him, firmly but gently grasping, twisting your left hand as you handled his balls with your right. 

You’d decided that he deserved another orgasm. And you weren’t going to waste a drop.

--------

You made it to work only thirty minutes late, blaming it on the trains.  Lin had you pressed, texting you all day as if y’all were having an affair.  

Whew. Your husband when he was focused was a force of nature. And today he was focused on you.

Lin was infatuated with his got damn wife. He shook his head. He just felt like he couldn’t get enough. He couldn't leave you alone. He texted you all day long.

Come with me tonight, my love. 

Mid week events drained the fuck out of you. And you had to go to work in the morning.

Take tomorrow off. A long weekend. You rolled your eyes. Maybe...

I can’t be apart from you all day and all night too.

I want my wife to feel like the Queen she is.  Let me show you that tonight, the world is yours.. C’mon…

You wondered how he was going to do that when everyone would want to talk to him, not you.  You weren’t stressing, because your husband was amazing, but like every other event, Lin would be pulled away and you’d have to entertain yourself most of the night.

It was sweet the way he was pursuing you, however, and he was wearing you down, but you had serious doubts.  

He went to get a haircut and send a selfie. Damn. That’s that shit you liked.

After numerous texts and voice memos throughout the day, you relented and were rewarded with a video of Lin doing the butterfly, and sweet, passionate words of poetry.  

You laughed and blushed at his attention, smiling down at your phone all day and making your co-workers shake their heads. It felt as if you were first dating. 

The text you received just before you left work gave you anxiety, however.

Hey, you. I can’t wait for tonight.  

Meet me there.  Have an important interview to do. Don’t want to rush you getting home and getting ready.

You rolled your eyes. 

Don’t roll your eyes. I guarantee, we will have fun. 😉  Go home, rest for a bit and then get ready.  It will be fine.

Damn Lin and his telepathic abilities.  He’d made you smile again, despite the fact that you would have to navigate part of this event alone.

You got home and allowed yourself a few minutes of quiet to reset your attitude before you got ready.  As you were lounging on the couch, Lin facetimed you from the car. He’d made sure to get one with a privacy screen.

“Hi.” 

Oh. Your heart.  He was so dang cute.

‘Hi Baby.”  

Lin blushed at your smile. Then he got himself together and gave you one of his looks.

“I know you will be gorgeous in anything, but I’d thought I’d let you see what I am wearing so that you could coordinate.” 

He rotated the phone down just a little so you could see his suit.  He’d conveniently left his lips in the frame. Your man was smart.

You stopped and stared, because of his lips, and because he was wearing THAT blue suit. 

The blue suit which had slim fit pants that fit so well that they emphasized the nice brown shoes on his nice, large feet.

The size of his feet in those shoes which reminded you of what else was large and which led you to get on your knees. 

Which led y’all to fuck while Lin was stil wearing that blue suit.  

Come to think of it, he’d bought a replacement because you two had ruined the last one.  You got that feeling in your stomach and in your loins when you saw him.

“Mmmmmmmm. Are you wearing that suit for any particular reason, Lin-Manuel?” You looked at him biting his lip for you.  Damn.

“What, this old thing? I just threw on the first suit in the closet…”

“Lin, you know that suit makes me hot for you…”

“Does it? Oh…” He just quirked his eyebrow quickly and focused on you.  Then he checked out the window.  “There’s a little traffic, so I have some time…”

“What are you thinking Mr. Miranda?.”  You were scared and exhiliterated at his tone. Today’s vibe was everything.

“I want you mi amor.  The way you look is just too much for a man sometimes…” He took in your face and neck, and he could literally smell you.

“Let me see the ta tas…”

“‘Ta tas?’ Really? You’re an accomplished writer and you come up with ‘ta tas’???” You were laughing, but he had you open.

“Let’s just say the blood is not exactly in my brain.” He panned the camera down and you saw that the pants were indeed tighter. You thought back to this morning.

"Damn, boy.  Make me wanna..." You kinda wish you were there, or he was with you, didn’t really matter.  How did he have you so caught up?

“Hmmmm. Cariña.  Did you make a mess?  Need to take a shower? Let me see.”

“Wwwhhhattt?”

“I said let me see…”  You thought about it only a second when you ran your hand down the collar of your shirt and unbuttoned it, showing him your black lace bra.

You heard his intake of breath and it made you wetter.

“Nice. Pinch your nipples for me.” You would indeed need to bathe, because your slick wetness was making a mess. You whimpered a little as you fingered your breasts over your bra as you were told.

“Harder, princesa”  You moaned louder.  “…. Fuck yeah, that’s it.”

Lin palmed his pants and panned down again. “See what you do to me?  We’re going to take care of this later. Now show me how you sparkle for me.  I wanna see it glistening.”

At this point, you were panting.  You brought your phone down to your crotch and opened your legs for him. This morning he’d made you go to work with no panties on, and you were glad now that you could give him a show. You felt incredible as you heard him curse and moan his approval.  

“Keep it right there. So good for me. So wet. I love that pretty little flower and how it’s only for me.”

Lin was making your life better with every word he said to you. You smiled then frowned because you needed him. 

“It is only for me, right? The way it feels when I’m inside, fits like a glove, so it has to be.” His voice was full of desire.

You moaned louder.  “Of course.”  You were a little mad. “What are you trying to do to me Lin? And you’re not even here. Must want me to…” 

So close but yet so far. You had to have some relief. 

Lin leaned back and palmed his cock again, getting comfortable in the seat of the car. Then he saw your fingers move into the frame.

"Don't touch it." Your hand stopped.You were in shock.

"What?" you whispered.

"You heard me.  I said.  Don't touch it."

You brought the phone up and  just stared at him. You were at the edge of madness.

"That clit is... MINE. And I say don't touch it."  

Who was this man?  He was your lord and you were under his command.  You had to cross your legs, because the throbbing between them was too much.  You whimpered.

"But... Lin.  Oh my God.  Do you know...?"

"Yes.  I do."  His voice cracked with desire.  "And I know that it is your body.  You can touch it if you really want to. But I am your husband.  And that clit..."  Lin paused. 

"... is mine.  I say don't touch it until I give you permission."

What was this man doing to you?  He owned you.  Completely. And he knew it.

"Fuck. I need you touch it? “ You weren’t rational.  “Now. Please."

You licked your lips and arched your back.  His eyes were now on your wet lips and flushed face.

"I’m sorry I’m not there to touch it... blow on it... lick it….suck the shit out of it...."  His voice was hoarse now.

You moaned.  And not quietly.  You wanted him.  Bad.  And Lin wanted to give it to you like never before.  

"Not at the moment.  And you won't either. Don't touch that clit until I tell you to.  I don't want you to come right now."

He was lying.  Lin wanted you to come. Now. Hard. And all over him. But he wasn’t where he needed to be. Such potential.  And he knew you were loving it.  You were the center of the world right now. 

The coil in your belly was wound tight, and on a hair trigger.  You could not think of going anywhere right now. If you saw Lin, you would not be responsible for what you might do.

He watched your closed eyes and licked his lips as he imagined what you were going through.  Delicious torture. It was what you both needed.

"Trust me.  Give me control.  I promise, you will thank me.  And I never make a promise I can't keep."

You were almost in pain, but you listened to your husband because you knew it would be worth it.  You tried not to move, although you needed him right now.

“I’m at the destination.  Come soon, yeah?”

You nodded, eyes screwed shut.  You really  wanted to come soon.

Lin called your name.  “Are you with me, my love?”  

“Yes, yes,  I am Lin.”

“Good.  See you soon.” 

---- 

Lin sent you the link to watch the red carpet and interview live.

He was not his usual excitable, smiley self with the press he had on his sunglasses and seemed a little mysterious, which only turned you on more, because you knew exactly what he was thinking about.  You knew he was wearing his apple watch tonight, so you decided to have some fun.

You lay back on the couch and pulled your breasts out of their bra cups. One hand went up to pinch a nipple while you took a photo with the other. You sent it to Lin.  

You watched for a few minutes as you saw him glance at his watch and smile, eyes still hidden behind his glasses.  He answered someone’s question, a slight smirk on his face.

You felt giddy with power, as the camera pulled back and showed a full body shot of Lin.  You giggled when you ascertained his situation. You ran and put on your Ruby Woo.

Good thing you’re not all the way hard, but I can tell you’re getting there. The fangirls will have a field day.  Good thing I’m the only one that gets to play with it.  

You snapped a pic of your red lips sucking your thumb and sent that.  You saw Lin check his watch again and you could see him put his hand in his pocket to hide his half boner and visibly try to attend to the reporter.  He looked super focused.

As he stopped at the end of the red carpet, you sent another text, with your hand going under your skirt.

You look so damn good, Baby. I can’t wait…

When Lin got the thumbnail on his watch, he raised his eyebrow behind his sunglasses and looked into the camera.  You thought he could see you through the distance. And there was desire, and a little fear, in the pit of your stomach.

After he disappeared into the building, you got a text.

Don’t do it my love. I’m coming home right after my interview, and I better still be the only one that’s touched it today.  Be. Good.

You thrilled at the news that he would be home soon and you didn’t have to suffer through a night out in a crowd.  You would have him all to yourself.  You eagerly watched his interview.

Line was in the chair across from the interviewer, still looking fierce. It was so hot.

“What do you say to all the young writers out there who just want to give up?”

Lin seemed to pause for a second, and then looked at the camera, seemingly right at you. Your hand brushed your thigh, so eager.

“I say Stop.”  Your hand stilled.  “Don’t touch it…” 

You could not believe him right now. 

“That feeling of defeat, I mean.” He smiled rakishly.  “If you are a fan, think of Lin-Manuel Miranda, pounding it out night after night until the goal is reached. Sometimes the best things in life are worth the wait.” 

This man is the devil, you thought, as your mind was spinning at the way he’d just talked dirty to you in front of an audience of millions.  You went to the bathroom to your whirlpool tub.  You ran the faucet hot, and sought out the candles that you wanted. You had something for Mr. Lin-Manuel Miranda.

------

Lin was beyond excited when he stepped into the house. He handled himself well at the event, feigning illness and escaping in record time.  All he wanted was that ill na na. He looked for you throughout the house, opening the door to the bathroom and saw a goddess.

All he could think was, "She's mine."

There you were, all wet in the bath tub, looking all glistening and shit. You were soaping yourself up with your hands and they were moving on your breasts, circling your beautiful nipples and areolas.

Damn! He wished his lips were your fingers. He licked, then bit his lip and quickly moved to the tub. He knew what you were doing. Even though you were bathing, you were looking him straight in the eye.

"Hello, Darling."

Lin just stared back at you, not trusting his voice at the moment. He felt like kneeling at your feet and licking straight up from your ankles to your pussy. Your delicious pussy... He cleared his throat and finally spoke.

"What are you doing?"

"What does it look like, silly? I'm taking a bath." You laughed at him. "It feels divine. Want to join?" The look in your eye was pure fun. 

Resisting was hard for Lin.

Lin was hard.

He was like a moth to a flame. 

"Make sure that you don't. Touch. My. Clit." The sexiness of Lin’s voice was everything.

You never broke eye contact as you soaped your hands. You then proceeded to wash your neck. It made him want to grab it. He moved his eyes away down your body. It was so wet. He wondered how wet. He licked his lips and swallowed.

"Thirsty?" That smile would be his undoing. He turned around and pulled a chair out from the marble vanity.

"Mmmmmm. Could be."

"That could be must be love, judging from the way your pants are draped around that pole."

"Oh, what do you mean? This?"

And your weakness was unveiled. Lin unzipped his pants, pulled out his caramel joy, and started stroking. You parted your lips to be able to breathe. You weren't sure you could continue to stand, so you sat on the edge of the tub and continued soaping your body.

Lin sat down and enjoyed the show. You were so fucking beautiful. He stroked himself faster. 

"You're going to go blind if you keep doing that." You laughed at him as you soaped your breasts again, soaping and pulling your nipples.

"You don't know how much danger you're in. Those are mine."

Your eyes twinkled as you continued to play. 

"Well, you said I couldn't touch your clit, not anything else." You watched the effect you had on him.

"One thing I can't figure out. Is how I'm supposed to get squeaky clean if I can't touch my... I mean your... clit, Mr. Miranda?"

You cocked your head to the side. You were so cute to Lin, but sexy as hell.

"Well, I'll give you a hand." Lin's grin was everything. "Sit back down in the tub. I'll wash what's mine."

You obeyed immediately, and that was so hot.

Lin came behind you and kneeled down, taking the soap and wetting his hands. He washed your neck, clasping it in one large hand and pulling it back as he kissed your forehead. He whispered in your ear.

"This neck.." he squeezed a little, "...is mine." The excitement in your belly grew.

He moved to your shoulders and started kneading them. You moaned with pleasure.

"If you'll let me, I'll take the weight off these shoulders, just keep trusting me."

Lin moved his soapy hands down to your breasts.

"These beautiful babies are mine to feast on whenever I want." He soaped and pulled your nipples as you writhed in agony.

Then, he slipped his hands down your torso, pausing at your hips.

You could see his beautiful smile out of the corner of your eye.

You shivered as he slid his hands in the water to your belly.

"Cold?"

You twisted and smirked up at him. 

"No, just the opposite."

He just kissed you lightly and then commanded, 

"Up on your knees."

Oh shit, you thought. You complied and then he traced your ass, and grabbed it forcefully.

"All of this bounteous beauty is mine, there is a God. Bend over."

Lin played with it a bit, teasing your hole, making your senses come alive, and then gave it a good smack that made you tingle.

Lin wanted to take you now, but his hands continued their journey.

"I want to die with these thighs around my shoulders. Good god, woman." 

He shook his head as he felt you down and up around your thighs, getting close but never touching your mound.

"Fuck, Lin!" You felt like you were going to faint.

"Sit."

You sat.

Lin massaged your calves and stretched them up as he stood up with your legs. You was bent in two, a stretch you did many times in yoga. 

He stretched you out, watching your face and then skillful fingers slipped up to your feet and massaged them a bit, making you moan again.

"These legs and feet are mine, so hopefully you'll never run from me." 

He laughed, and you did too, until he spread your legs apart in the air. He ran his hands back down your legs as you panted to breathe. His hands were at your core.

"And this, yes. This is mine." He started to wash your clit. and you moved against his hand, hungry for him. He stroked and stroked and finally entered you with his fingers. Your wetness blended with the water and you felt as if you were floating as your coil snapped and you held on to this arm for dear life, drenching his suit jacket.

"Llllinnnn!!!!!"

Your screams echoed off the bathroom walls as you came, the tension and emotion of the day released.

"Damn baby, I love when you scream my name..."

Lin stood up and started stroking himself again. He felt as if he would be very rough with you, and while he didn't think you would mind, he wanted to take his time.

You watched for a minute recovering, staring at what you wanted to have ravage you You had an idea and scooted over to him. He was standing directly over you, so you reached up, unzipped his pants more fully, pulled him completely out and started sucking the boys as he continued to stroke.

"Fuck!!!!"

"Yes, baby."

You continued for a bit and then turned around and let him blow the back out of your throat.

"Good lord!"

You swallowed like a good girl.

"Baby. That head game is stronger than Excedrin."

Lin finally stripped down as you watched, recovering and getting ready.

He climbed in the tub with and enveloped you in his arms.

Lin held you as he stroked your pussy with his left hand and pulled and twisted your nipple with his right. He whispered words of encouragement in your ear.

“You are so beautiful, my love, I live for you. I love watching your body surrender to me.  You take me so well. Your mouth is heaven and your pussy is paradise...

He was an expert at your pleasure. He smiled as you came again in his arms, vibrating to their frequency.

He kissed your wet shoulder as you came down.

"Are you alright? How do you feel?"

"I feel like a million bucks!" You were grinning.

He grinned back and you, turned on the jets and relaxed in the hot water with you.

--------

“Lin, is something wrong?” You were suddenly worried. “What. Was today about?”

You could feel him smile against as he kissed your wet shoulder.

“It was me trying to show you how much I love you, want you and need you. And I had a dream that made me remember something. This morning.”  He paused.

“What is ist?”

He decided to just say it. “Am I better than Jason?

You turned to face him, a dumbfounded look on your face. “Jason who?”

Lin looked at you as if you were crazy. It dawned on you.

“You mean… are you talking about Jason Watson. From college?”   You started dying laughing. 

“My love. Sweet love.  The minute I got a piece of your caramel joy, you put all others to shame.”

Lin blushed and kissed you, soft and sweet.  You smiled at him and ran your hand over his bare chest, heating up again.  

You used your thumbs over his nipples.  You could feel him get hard between you.  You both looked down and watched.

“I honestly haven’t thought about Jason since the first night you and I made love.”  Lin looked up at you with those big, brown eyes, and you were helpless, just like the first time you saw him. 

He was fully erect now.  Lin put his hand under your arms and lifted you on top of him, easing you down slowly, wetly, over his tip.

You could feel him pounding as he leaned forward to suckle your nipples, alternating agonizingly between them.  

He did not make you sink down on him by force, only reached between you and started slowly rubbing your clit with his thumb, gradually speeding up.

Although you wanted to enjoy this feeling, your hips started moving in tiny circles as you sank down on him, stretching out around his cock. 

Your head went back as you fully sheathed him, and he took the opportunity so suck at your pulse point.  Then he leaned back and watched as you rode him in the water. He was truly enjoying your face, gorgeous and fucked out.

You rode him as well as you could, your knees weak in the water. Lin wanted to rail you, so he watched as long as he could, slowly going insane with the desire to just fuck you, hard and deep.  

After a few minutes of exquisite torture, he shifted and suddenly your head was laying on the side of tub as he smacked your wet ass and plunged back into you from behind.

Your screams echoed off the bathroom walls as he set a blistering pace, deeply and soundly digging into you, his thumb in your other hole. The sensations were too much as you ascended to nirvana, Lin sloppily following your orgasm with his own end.

Lin had to stop and get his bearings, looking at the bathroom mirrors fogged up by the heat of the water and by your hard breathing. He was lightheaded, and felt as if he had emptied his soul into you.

He chuckled as he rubbed your wet legs and back, easing out of you, listening to you hiss as the sting of his removal.

You watched as he went to the shower and turned it on, washing off the bath oil and lovemaking.  

“You gonna join me this time?” 

Lin was cocking his eyebrow at you, just as he had on the red carpet.

All you could do was shake your head at your ruin as you left the bath and got into the shower with him.

Four weeks later:

You stared at the third test you had taken that morning.  You couldn't believe it.  It was unexpected, but you were suddenly filled with joy.  You came out of the bathroom, a big grin on your face.

Lin was propped up in bed, on his laptop working. It was Saturday morning and you would normally be annoyed, but not today.

You stood there grinning as he finally looked up at you.  “What?” he smiled back at you.

You couldn’t contain it, couldn’t do it in a sly, or cutesy way, so you just said it.

“I’m pregnant! You’re gonna be a Dad!”  

Lin just stared at you, dumbfounded. Wow.  He could not comprehend

“Hunh.  Wonder how that happened?”

He was snapped out of it by the severe force of a pillow smacking him in the face and your smirk as you jumped on top of him to beat him up.

He captured your arms and managed to get you beneath him.

You both smiled at each other, deliriously happy.

“You’re the best thing that ever happened to me Lin-Manuel.  I love you.”

“I love you too.  Mama.”  The way he was looking at you.

“Fuck, you’re gonna get me double pregnant…” 

“I’m just the man who can.”

[appleflavoredkitkats]

Why do you think Quackity will approach Fundy? As in for What reason?

good question anon!

there's three answers i could think of: 1.) quackity sees the potential in fundy in running casinos in las nevadas, especially since fundy's reputation in the server is “the local foxman who scams and pranks others for fun”, 2.) quackity and fundy share similar ideologies, and 3.) quackity genuinely cares about fundy, and would want to help him out.

for the first reason, fundy is notorious for being really good with tricking other people. sometimes, he does these pranks and does the best he can to twist his words to perplex others into buying a deal, when in reality, the deal is very much a scam. fundy would be a PERFECT worker at las nevadas, especially since he doesn't sympathize with others when it comes down to it. i don't mean he's emotionless and unsympathetic— but i do see fundy as someone who is thought-driven, easy to stick to curriculums and follow orders without easily giving into emotions. we see this a lot with fundy's time in manberg— his spy ploy was easily unnoticeable. it was so convincing that even some fans didn't know it was a thing until he revealed it to tommy. he WILL stick to façades and plans as long as he wants to until he realizes it's dysfunctional, which is why he would work well in las nevadas.

(plus, his entire schtick is that he can serve other people well because it gives him a purpose, so he'd definitely be a great addition to quackity's team.)

for the second reason— fundy and quackity actually share a lot of similarities! the most noticeable one was their view on l'manberg. quackity expressed how he feels left out by l'manberg, and that he wants to make it more open and welcoming, while fundy on the other hand was the first to question l'manberg's ideals because he didn't feel as welcomed. these two somehow have a shared sense of loneliness and being isolated by other people, especially by people they view as friends.

and what sucks is that these two characters care so much. quackity's entire arc revolves around him doing the worst things possible for his own friends. he cares so much about them that he's sacrificing everything. fundy on the other hand does care about others too, but he's more subtle. that's why he ignores that he's being abandoned by others— he's in denial that other people are capable of leaving him, showing that he cares for others so, so much. fundy is a very devoted character. as much as he is a prankster, you can see that when he's given a task by people he cares about, he follows easily. he grows so attached to them even if he knows that they've abandoned him. this is why he keeps schlatt's sword, or why he still hangs out with phil even if phil HATES his guts.

and recently, we can see that both of these characters are abandoned. not intentionally of course, what kind of dream smp plot would it be without bad communication skills, but kinoko kingdom unintentionally left quackity, and fundy was left alone once nlm was dissolved. they're alone. quackity might've even witnessed how alone fundy was during doomsday. with their similarities, quackity might feel compelled to ask fundy to join las nevadas because he completely sympathizes with him.

and that goes to our third point— quackity might genuinely care for fundy. sure, they don't seem to be characters who would be there for each other often, but for two characters who don't interact much, these two have been with each other for every other plotline? the election arc, the manberg cabinet, witnessing schlatt's descent, new l'manberg's beginning, the butcher army, doomsday— out of all the characters, the one who can sympathize with quackity's past the most is fundy because HE ALSO EXPERIENCED IT. there can be some type of mutual respect they have for each other because they UNDERSTAND each other.

but as much as i can argue about quackity genuinely caring about fundy, i do want to emphasize that quackity would most likely approach fundy with his main motivation being business. genuine care for fundy must be second. like quackity said, there's no time for feelings in las nevadas, so he DEFINITELY will approach fundy because he views him as a good addition to the business. care will always come second, as much as quackity cares for fundy, it will never be the main priority.