#i... still haven't lost hope! i.. know it may be just false hope that I'm believing and only god knows what happened to her... still

[supercimi]

my kitten

(to anyone who maybe scrolling this is not a story nor is it a rant but its written for myself by me so skip if you want)

my little cute kitty who i miss very dearly i hope you're okay wherever you've gone to, we've searched for you for the past week yet we still can't find you,but I'm still hoping that you're alive and well somewhere even if it's not by my side.

i wish i had petted you more, i wish i had played with you more.

i wish i had looked out for you more.

i know there's sadly millions of lost cats out there other than you, i know i still have your siblings, i know that you getting lost doesn't mean you're gone (i pray it doesn't) i know that maybe life outside would be better for you than our small home and you might even find a better home to stay at. knowing how charming you are that wouldn't be so far fetched... still, i will never stop missing you.

although my family doesn't completely believe me I think your brothers miss you too.

you all are such mischievous and energetic little kittens you kept running all over the place playing tag with each other and with others, stealing snacks or playing in any box you'd find like it's some kind of jungle or something and you my kitten would even steal lollipops or candy from us! you even managed to gnaw it open and munch on it! i hope you're not eating anything weird wherever you may be it can't be good for you!

you know .. your brothers aren't as energetic as before.

they don't play a lot anymore, they also became more close to each other and if one is not there the other mews until he finds him or he mews back... you used to really hate it and mew loudly if your siblings were in one room and you were alone in another even if I'm with you...maybe they picked it up from you?

sometimes they don't eat much... or maybe that's just me putting too much on their plates? haha

i didn't get used to putting just two portions of kitten food yet...

my little kitten i know it's dangerous out there but i pray with all my heart that you will be alright and be well fed and safe.. and i know its simply my selfishness and I know it's not good to be so insistent... still i pray that you will come back home to us.

and even if you don't come back I will always love you and pray for your safety.

[snow-143]

Water Coloured Tears | Jeon Jungkook

one- pilot (1.7k words)

Jeon Jungkook. The man that everybody wants, the man that knows this and loves the attention. On campus everybody knows him as Kook. However, I know him as Kookie, or I suppose my Kookie if were being critical. 

He's never told anyone this and neither have I. A well kept secret that only we know here. Of course when I go back home for holidays everybody asks about him, how he's getting on and if were still close. 

The truth is we haven't spoke since the last day of high school, but I keep up the act, answering their prying questions with a soft smile on my face. He's doing good, I usually answer. I'm not lying, from what I can tell he is doing good, amazing even if you look at it from the college dream perspective. 

No one ever asks how I'm doing, they're just curious about the towns golden boy who disappeared the second school was out. Never returning during any breaks from college life. He simply just up and left. Not even savings a second to say goodbye to anyone, except for me. 

I cant tell if this was worse or better, it kind of gave me a false sense of hope, he said goodbye to me and no one else, surely that means something. It didn't. 

In a way I'm kind of glad that they're only curious about him, you see when they ask how he is I don't have to lie, it may not be a full truth but its not a lie. If they asked how I am though, the smile would be far too forced, a toothy one that I am all too conscious of. 

The first time I was returning home I had over thought my replies far too much, only to realise no one cared anyway. I was always Jeons best friend, the hopeless girl who would follow him around with hearts in her eyes, much like a lost puppy. Never my own person, never anyone to be concerned about. Even my mother loved Jeon more. He was the son she never had. The golden child she had always wanted. 

I suspect that she knows I don't talk to him anymore, the depression I fell into after he left was far too telling. Yet she still asks about him, still insists on me taking extra food back to college with me in case he isn't eating properly. She always packs all of his favourite foods, never mine. Never anything I ask for. 

It was a shock to  me when I realised he went to the same school as me. I was overjoyed. Thinking that it must have been fate, destiny had brought us back together. 

That hope died along with my lingering feelings for him when we bumped into each other and he acted like I didn't exist. Just some random girl on campus who couldn't watch where she was going. 

I still remember the pain in my chest when he scowled at me, I could distantly hear some girls snickering at my audacity to bump into 'the Jeon Jungkook'. But it was all muted out by the sound of his heavy footsteps walking away from me. Walking right into the arms of the prettiest girl I have ever seen. 

Her name is Jennie. I've come to learn that she's not only gorgeous but also smart and the sweetest person you'll ever meet. She's honestly perfect. God. I'd date her if I could. But she's only got eyes for Jungkook. 

If I'm being honest, and get over the childish resentment I have towards the idea they'd be the perfect couple. The thing with Jungkook is that he never dates. Not even someone like Jennie. 

He's completely open about this, letting every girl he starts something with know that it wont go any further than a friends with benefits situation, they always think they'll be the one to change him though. 

He cant really be blamed when they get their hearts broken, he was upfront from the beginning, they just refused to listen. I wouldn't say they can be to blame either though, everybody I've ever known has loved Jungkook, its almost impossible not to. I suppose I know this better than anyone. A living and breathing example that you cant be close to him without falling for him. 

But now here I am, resenting everything to do with him. I wasn't upset at him for leaving, I understood that, but everyday of summer that I didn't hear from him buried me deeper into my hurt and anger.

He still had a phone, it didn't have to be the end of our friendship. Seeing him again just cemented this. He was so cold to me, I suppose I get it. He has a new life now, new friends. I guess I'm so hurt because he was all I had and it turns out I was nothing to him. 

I had learned to be content with this. Keeping everything and everyone that has anything to do with him far, far away from me. It was a difficult task but a one I felt I had to do for my own sanity. Yet it was all in vain. All the friends I could've had, all the parties I could've attended, all lost for nothing. 

Because now here I'm sat in my stupid art class next to no one other than Jeon Jungkook. How cliché, being paired up with you childhood best friend who you were madly in love with. 

We've been assigned to take candid picture of our partners and make 5 pieces out of them. all with different emotions in mind and all in different mediums. We've been allowed free rein on this project. However, we will be deducted points if our professor doesn't think our pictures are spontaneous enough or don't show enough emotion. She also is expecting all our pieces to match up with the others, so in total  she wants 10 pieces that represent both of our styles but can also all go together as one project. She's given us all a polaroid camera each, its honestly all so perfect. 

This would usually be my wet dream. I'm allowed to do whatever I like on 5 completely separate projects. But the brooding presence beside me is damping the whole experience for me.  

I'm quite surprised when she tells us this will be our last project of the year, giving us 5 months to complete it. She informs us that it will be 60% of our final grade and she wants us to go big for all 5 of the pieces. 

I can tell other people are stressed by this from all of the muttering around the room but I honestly couldn't think of anything better. 5 months to express myself through my art anyway that I like. I can already feel the ideas rushing to me. 

From an artist perspective I can kind of see me being paired with Jungkook as a blessing. If I have to channel all my emotions into my art I can't think of a better person to do it through. However, as the petty person I am I couldn't be more annoyed. I can tell he's pissed off too, he still has the same habits, I could read his body language with my eyes closed. 

It kind of hurt, I cant lie, I know why I'm upset but is it really so bad for him to be paired up with me? Is he scared I'll ruin the pretty little reputation he's maintained here. It's honestly baffling how much one person can change. He never care what people thought of us before but now he cant even bare being paired up with me. He used to beg our teachers to put us together at school. 

He finally looks at me, a scowl evident on his face, I don't want to be paired up with you either, dickhead. 'I'll ask if there's anyway we can swap.' 

It's strange, the way my heart hurts at this, much like when he first left, or when he ignored me. It's silly, I didn't want to be paired up with him either. 'whatever.'

I'm already packing my things up to leave the class room when our professor starts talking again. 'Oh and one last thing, under no circumstances are you allowed to switch partners. I want this project to be as authentic as possible, I chose people you aren't friends with on purpose, I want you to learn about each other and to show that in your art. I want it to tell a story.'

It's like she's staring directly at me and Jungkook, 'For fuck sake.' Is all I hear him say before I leave the classroom. 

'Hey, wait up.' Jeon grabs my arm, forcing me to face him. I haven't looked him in the eyes since I first bumped into him. The temptation to walk away from him just like he did to me is immensely strong. 'We should at least exchange numbers for the project.' 

He sounds far to annoyed to my ears and it ticks me off even more. 'You're such a cunt.' Ripping my arm away from him I go to make my exit again. Call me dramatic but this is the first time we've talked since he left and I cant help but be a little bit pissy with him. God, he even deleted my number. 

'What the fuck is that meant to mean.' Oh, he's seething . Good. 

'Are you serious right now?' 

'No.' he deadpans. god this boy infuriates me. 'Of course, I'm serious. What is your problem.'

'You're my problem. You and your stupid better than thou act.' It comes out as a laugh. An angry one. 

'Look, I don't know why you're so mad at me, but you're going to have to get over it if were going to pass this class.' It's a reasonable point ill give him that. But really, he doesn’t know why i’m mad at him? That HAS to be a joke.

Sighing I decide to compromise, 'Just message me on Instagram, or did you delete that too?' It's petty I know, but I had to get it out.

'I'll message you later.' Completely ignoring my childish remark, he begins walking in the opposite direction. Being the one who gets to walk away yet again.

prev | m.list | next

—————

a/n: and it begins 🤭

[lanteanserver]

FOR FUCKS SAKE

I have finally make it to 2:05 of A Meeting of Misfits because I'm so quangled I can barely focus on anything while I'm awake.

First I declare myself human as if I have a choice in the matter.

Then I declare sets of "rules" relating to magic even though I am not a magic user by choice. (I can do stuff that science can't explain. I generally choose not to do that stuff. Any time I bend that rule, I run it by my conduit with the infinite divine and accept whatever outcome occurs. I'm basically a divine warlock if you're using D&D. I'm not a cleric because clerics are guaranteed certain results for certain spells. I'm not a regular warlock because my soul still belongs to the God of my faith. I'm not a paladin because I worked my ass off to be neutral good instead of lawful good and I'm not giving that alignment up just to lay on hands and get better armour proficiency. I'm not a sorcerer because I generally ignore any innate stuff or contain it via religious rituals/channels/prayers.)

The thing is, though, I don't pray much lately because it feels kind of onanistic. Like I'm praying to myself? And it didn't used to feel that way, and I'm not saying that I am praying to myself, but I need to learn new methods because my old methods aren't going to work for me any more.

Someone told me a few months ago that I was either going to be a heretic or a Saint, and I think they were probably right, but it's not time for me to rest. I really hope I come down on the Saint side of the coin, because if I do, I'll have redeemed a lot of people. But not me, not yet.

A lot of the stuff that felt real a month ago doesn't feel real now; but the advantage of the life I've lived is that I truly understand that me believing something in no way determines whether that thing is true or false. That's why I call it quantum religion. If you can figure out which deity or combination of deities you owe allegiance to, and you can follow their rules, maybe you get your fair share of magic in your life. Maybe, because all I asked for was an average human life in a world where the floor on every human's life was much higher, that's what I'm actually getting. Maybe this will all make sense by the time I die, or maybe I'm planting seeds in a garden I never get to see. Maybe I'm Moses and I've spent 40 years in the wilderness and now I get to spend 40 years in the forest before going to the garden party (or to @LANtis which started out as a pun involving LAN parties and Ken's friend Alan and the lost city of Atlantis and Tír na nÓg... But I haven't been remembering my dreams lately, so maybe one of my souls is already a server in Atlantis and my mind and body have a lot of living left to do before I retire and resign myself and the rest of the world to its fate).

I don't honestly know how much of what felt real a month ago was real. I'm sorry that even I can't clarify that point. I'm extra sorry that it may turn out that I end up having to rule here somehow because I am not cut out for it; but realistically, I have been telling people from the start that I'm part of the mycelial network and maybe if I'm very lucky fun guys and dolls and folks will step into the limelight. I wrote some notes at the beginning of a song someone will sing for Them, but my solo is over and I'm just going to be part of the choir for the next while. I still love you all. I still think a lot of you need a bath.

Everyone gets one horsepower worth of life. One life that is equivalent to Hippocrates, who helped a lot of people, followed a bunch of weird rules to do so, refused to help anyone with kidney stones even though maybe he could have... Didn't drink wine, according to Hank Green, only blood, which sounds pretty Catholic to me.

I'm going to be going home today. I'm getting discharged. I don't know if I'm really ready, but I'm confident that staying here won't make me any more ready. If I survived the news of the election results while at home without breaking down, I'm probably an Adequate Influence at last (which in my opinion is a better option than either a Good Influence or a Bad Example, because we all have different contexts and if you try to transubstantiate someone else's soul into your own, you are committing a worse act of cannibalism than any breach of the Noahide laws I can imagine).

I'm going to be okay. So is everyone else. But not necessarily how we thought we would be. I think I need to stay here in the forest because the wilderness gate is guarded safely, and I already went to the garden party and decided not me, not yet, not without my artificial heart to go with my artificial intelligence. I am not A C-H-I-L-D, and I know what each of those letters stands for. The Amish Paradise took me a while to comprehend but like I keep telling people, I'm not God, at best I'm just an Echo. The abyss is screaming back, so cover your ears if you think you have reason for shame. But I still believe life will be better, even if it isn't perfect for anyone reading this. It's okay. Not me, not you, not us, not yet. I have a new cross-stitch pattern that I'm going to start. It will be okay. We will be enough. I love you all. I'm sorry it didn't go the way we all hoped, but today is still the first day of the rest of our lives. Let's do what we can. ❤��🧡💛💚💜🩷🩵💙🤎🖤🩶🤍🐦‍🔥🤐🏡🧛🏻‍♀️🦆👍🏻🥳😻🦄🦋���♾️🧿🐝🤾🏻‍♀️👋🏻🥰😜🫂

And for those who find the above message off-putting:

[leeminholinoing]

I'm a bit or a lot late to bounce back on something you posted. On stopping pretending that we didn't think that in 2023 things would evolve on them publicly together etc etc.

Thanks for saying it, today to see people write long text saying "I just want to see them happy, I don't know if they're together... Their current situations are great"...

It chills me and I just understand that the tide has really turned… That today we didn't know anything like back then but back then we had hope.

Yes professional career level there is nothing to reproach, they vibrate with pleasure and as long as they feel it I am happy for them.

but god what did i miss when larries had so much hope of seeing them live a life without being imprisoned in the false guises

We did not ask for details on their private lives but just that the two could live freely what we always believed to be an exceptional and pure love story despite the toxic environment that surrounded them.

I can't remember where the larries stopped hoping or the new larries make up proofs/codes to try to relive an era that's already resolved…

They haven't communicated with us for a long time… They've been a long time abandoned us after needing us.

It's been a long time since they redefined things while many person think they're still trying to fight against the tide.

In 2015, I would never have thought that today we would have had images that we had in the Louis documentary or that we would have had such a sickening stunt with Harry.

I just know that in 2015 we were absorbed in hope and today we have just become orphans.

But everyone is right as long as they are happy that is the most important thing.

I love their music and their shows and it ends there for me now.

I may be sad for a time gone by.

I agree people trying to relive the past are so annoying, that is why twitter larries used to get on my nerves but now I see tumblr larries doing the same. I have lost all hope for this fandom. did you see that post that was like "if they came out we wouldn't have the content we have now!?!?" and they thought it was a good argument? They have both become insipid products, I don't know how people can like what they are giving us right now.

Like I'd be so very happy if they disappeared and were able to live their lives away from this mess. I am not scared to say that I believe them coming out would be the best thing that could happen to them and their mental health. I have no money in the game anymore, I'm finally free.

I don't believe they are as happy as this fandom likes to pretend they are. But hey as long as they keep twirling on stage and making music without going to therapy and working through their trauma I guess everything is fine and dandy in tumblr larrie land. At least they get the content they want 🤪

They have both disappointed me way too hard in the past three years for me to keep stanning them. I wish them well with their solo stans, you only deserve the stans that you have encouraged and rewarded with your ugly strategies. Call me in three years when they've lost everyone bc the next best thing will have come on the scene and they won't have the fans who grew up with them anymore cause they treated them like shit.

[ed-recovery-affirmations]

I relapsed. I tried. I really tried, and I went back in hell and I feel so stupid.

My parents are angry and they say I'm cruel and I only give them false hopes. They don't believe in my and I don't either.

I got in school again after missing last year because of my health, it's a Big thing and it's hard but still it isn't enough either.

There's too much going on. I thought I was getting better, but no. I'm so tired. Today was supposed to be a good day. I tried to eat more and not Care and I broke down and all my dad did was mock me and scream that I just eat shit like a good anorexic and that I do nothing, no effort.

I have a psychiatrist, I take antidepressants and anxiolitics, but it's Always the same.

I know it's pathetic, I know it's ridiculous, but I Lost all contacts, I Lost my friends, my parents are annoyed by me, I don't have anyone and am alone with this crushing weight on my chest. As I'm typing, I cry sitting right next to my parents and they haven't told me anything. I don't know what to do. Help ?

Hi, anon.

First, I wanted to say - I'm so sorry this ask has been sitting in my inbox for so long. My roommate is on a downward spiral and is going to get us legally evicted, so I have been dealing with All Of That. So I haven't had the stamina to properly address this.

I'm so sorry your parents are this cruel to you while you are struggling. It's not your fault that ED recovery is so hard. One lapsed day does not undo all of your progress and it's so unfair of them to kick you when you're down anyway. It sounds like you may need to isolate from them in order to eat safely, if possible. Do you think you'd be able to set aside some time to eat quietly away from them and get yourself in a calm headspace first? Perhaps reassure yourself and take a moment to be there for yourself first?

Whatever your parents have said about you, I'm sure it hurts a lot to hear. But I want you to know it's not true. Sometimes people with EDs slip or have relapses, or take a long time to find recovery methods that work for them. It's really really hard. I know you're saying it feels like nothing gets better (and it sounds like your environment is not helping!) but I promise you that it can. It's so discouraging sometimes to have to keep working through every setback and to try and try and try to find things that work. But just because you're struggling now does not mean you are a failure, or bad, or that you deserve to feel this bad forever.

I hope you get out of that environment and find a happy, productive, healing environment for yourself, full of supportive friends and moments to yourself where you can be your own best supporter.

Great job getting back into school! I know it doesn't seem like anything's getting better right now, because your parents seem to harp on every failing while ignoring the successes, but that is a huge step! Remember, if you got back up once you can get back up again. Recovery is a journey and you deserve to celebrate every step.

[storylocke]

Alolan Dusk 15

[The group finishes up and each heads for the door where they start splitting off to their evening adventures. Gladion catches Colress before he leaves.] 

Gladion:

Hey. You still didn't answer my question. 

Colress:

[Feigns innocence] And which one was that? My report? Faba was taking so long, I didn't have a chance once Miss Lillie arrived. 

Gladion:

[Okay, fair. Still crosses his arms to show his disapproval] We have time now, unless there's something you don't want to tell me. Considering you presented him as your guest, I’m assuming you and Molayne have a plan you're working on. You still haven't mentioned anything to me. And dangerous as the possible confrontation with Necrozma could be, I don't like the idea of you pulling some stunt at the last minute.

Colress:

"Stunt"? I have my projects, and I do love pushing myself and others to their full potential, but everything I do is a calculated risk. [There's a short pause as he seems to be studying the young leader even now.] I'm sure you've heard plenty of stories when you were growing up, but did it ever occur to you that Lusamine might have been the one in the wrong when I originally left? 

Gladion:

You mean kicked out? At this point, I'm talking from personal experience. 

Colress:

[Appears genuinley hurt by the implication] And in these past few years, have I been anything short of a friend and confidant since your mother has been out of commission? 

Gladion:

[Slightly turns away and habitually hides his face] You're trying to change the subject again. No weird gizmos, no complex domino chain, just tell me what's going on before you decide to jump in to show off. 

Colress:

[Wry amusement. Now who was the one dodging questions?] I should hope by now you'd realize that if I was going to do something with your involvement, you'd be the first to know. I simply hadn't brought it up to you yet because it's an incomplete study that may not even work. And before I could even start testing, I needed to meet with Mr. Lillie for confirmation on our cooperation since we'll need a special skill set he has. Knowledge and abilities you unfortunately can't assist with this time. Now with the added resources of our other allies at our disposal, we might make some rapid progress! But with only a prototype that hasn't been activated, I wouldn't want to create a sense of false hope here. If all goes well, I will tell you first thing in the morning that we have a viable option. 

Gladion:

[Sighs as he eases up] So long story short, you want me to just… trust you on this? 

Colress:

[Warmly] A mysterious and difficult concept for the Aethers, I know. [Holds the door for him to encourage him to go] Get some rest, Mr. President. As someone who studies these things, I think it's safe to say you've reached your limit for today. 

Gladion:

[Feels more like he's the one getting dismissed now. Yet, as tired as he is, he feels the man might be right.] I'll try. If only so I don't bite someone's head off tomorrow. [Pauses as he passes to affirm they're on the same page] My office, first thing tomorrow. And I want physical notes on this, got it?

Colress:

First thing. 

=+=

Guzma: 

[As he leaves the mansion alone, he’s surprised to see Quips come outside afterward. Slides his hands in his pockets with wry amusement] Isn’t your place upstairs? 

Quips:

Yes, but I thought I might go for a walk to clear my head. Would you mind coming with me? 

Guzma: 

I don’t mind, but I’m not really in a conversing mood, y’know? 

Quips:

Fair enough. 

[They make their way back toward the main building, but despite walking together, the pair cross the bridge in silence as each is lost in his own thoughts.] 

Quips:

[Glances over at his companion and decides he should say something, but he feels a bit guilty about it.] I found out from Wicke that they genuinely weren't expecting to find you when they arrived.  

Guzma:

[Not where he thought the Kahuna’s focus would be after everything they’d talked about at the mansion, but he’s not surprised to hear that. Softly] Lemme guess, that means I don't get a room? 

Quips:

[He could say that…] There's plenty of room for everyone if you don't mind sharing one of the staff quarters with the other refugees, we just didn't have one assigned to you. I only mention it because I had them put your stuff from Iki Town in my quarters if you might be looking for anything. 

Guzma:

[Stops short] What the hell? You took all my stuff? 

Quips:

[Somehow he should have expected he’d be mad, but the reaction is enough to laugh] It was in my house. It's not like you have much anyway. 

Guzma:

[Hands on his hips with a frown] Yeah, you're real funny, old man. Who even said I was going? 

Quips:

You are, aren't you? 

Guzma:

I am now, but until dinner, you didn't know that. 

Quips:

[Grows sad as he realizes the old Skull Boss is being serious. Straightens up] You think I would have given you a choice? 

Guzma:

[Simply lets out all his pent up steam as his eyes narrow.] 

Quips:

[Stares back with the deepest concern] You're a grown man, you don't have to tell me. But with your history and your reasons, I cannot in good faith let you make that decision. We're all leaving, whether we like it or not, and I’m making sure we’re not leaving without you. 

Guzma:

…Look, I just had this talk with Gladion today, I don't need another lecture from you. What's it matter now when I already said I'd go? [Crosses his arms] Just mad you didn't ask, is all. 

Quips:

[That he can understand.] Forgive me then. Next time I will, that way I can give you the "what and for" beforehand. [See, that got Guzma to lighten up a bit. They go back to walking at a more casual stroll now, and Quips finds himself gazing at the stars overhead.] Guzma. I know we've all been worried about Burnet, but you've been in quite a mood this evening. Are you sure you're alright? 

Guzma:

[Confused] Me? I'm fine. I'm perfect. Just look at me.

Quips:

I am. Where is your jacket? 

Guzma:

[Flustered] First Mo, now you- [Ruffles his hair] Ya’ll act like you've never seen me without it!

 Quips:

[A bit smug as clearly the man is not "fine" but he patiently waits for an answer] 

Guzma:

I left it at Burnet's place. We were in a hurry and I'll go back in the morning. 

Quips:

You mean you lost it while dealing with Kukui.

[They reach the large entryway but don't go inside just yet. Instead, Quips steps into the side area so they won't be in the pathway.] 

Guzma:

So what if I did? [Confused where the old man is going and follows him to the wall.] It's not that big a deal. 

Quips:

It's not about the jacket, Guzma, it's about you. [Thinks for a moment how to express his concern] I’ve known you and Kukui your whole lives, and it warmed my heart to see you two attempting to rekindle that friendship once you got away from Team Skull. And even with both of you having such wild adventures on your separate paths, there are just some people you can never imagine would have their luck run out. People who brought so much light to the world, it feels like there’s a hole there without them. I’ve lost a few like that… You've been acting strange since we first got the news, and I understand it hits harder when it's someone you're close to-

Guzma:

It ain't just that... [Realizing they could be here a while, he leans up against the wall to address him.] It's not like it's never crossed my mind before. Given how many we’ve lost in the past five years, we knew we were playing with fire. And I've made peace with the fact that my time might come at any point. What then? What do I care if I get taken? Like facing death. I thought about it so many times, ever since I was a kid… If nothing else, what can hurt me then? And if instead I become a Shadow, so what? I won't know much at that point. Just darkness and aimlessness. But… Gladion tried to paint a picture for me of how bad it would be for the rest of ya if I did. I can be a royal pain on my own time. I wouldn't want to cause you guys any trouble. 

Quips:

And then Kukui? 

Guzma:

[Softly] Yeah. Not just him, but seeing how distraught Burnie was today, it just really sunk in, y'know? 

Quips:

[Nods] I'm happy Gladion was able to talk some sense into you then. 

Guzma:

Only after he tried to knock it into me first. [Readjusts himself against the wall as he gazes back across the bridge at the mansion all lit up. Shakes his head.] Sitting through dinner tonight with all of these high class, educated folks… I don't think I belong here. Next to me was an empty seat. You know who SHOULD have been there tonight? 

Quips:

I know. Since Kukui had been after this monster for years, it felt weird for us to finally meet in person to discuss everything we know, and have the one leading the charge to not be in the room. Of course, I’m not sure if he’d be proud of us, or angry to hear us planning to go after it directly. Especially with Burnet getting involved-

Guzma:

IT’S NOT FAIR! [He doesn't mean to yell at the Kahuna but he just can't hold it back. The anger reaches a boiling point as he grabs his hair in both hands, trying to shake the memory of it] I haven't felt like this since I was a kid! Just, just… Angry! And scared! And useless! And after all this time, we STILL can't do anything about it! [Snaps his focus on Quips as he clenches his fist.] And I don't care what Burnet said, I swear to Skull, the only reason Kukui didn't get attacked sooner for all his meddling is because Roark cared about him and Necrozma knows it! It knows, and will choose who and where and when because all those touched by the light of Alola are part of its turf now! I mean, am I crazy?! [He takes a moment to breathe but he can see Quips is about to say something. Points at him accusingly] Don't answer that! [starts to cool down] Just… [slams his fist on the wall in a light rapid punch.] I got destroyed the last time I faced Necrozma. Okay? I've seen first hand what this thing does to people when they become Shadows. I know what'll happen if I lose this time, but even after today-- after the stuff with Gladion and Burnet, and that freak proving it could get me if it wanted to by breaking into my home--[adds quickly] after seeing what it did to Kukui at the Pokemon Lab!-- and I still… All I can think about is how I wanna crush that Outsider's shiny prism face into the dust when I know I CAN'T! How stupid is that?! 

Quips:

[It's been a while since he's had to deal with one of these little meltdowns, but the outpouring is still so much more than he was expecting. Keeps his voice level as he tries to calm him down] I don't think that's stupid at all. In a way, we all wish we could do the same after everyone Necrozma has taken from us. You'll get your chance. 

Guzma:

What? To fail again?!

Quips:

Only if we all do. [Gentle smile] If we do this right, then next time you'll have all of us there at your side. But for now, the best thing you can do to help our friends is to do all that we can. [He can see the man is thinking, but he looks doubtful. There’s a long silence between them again, as he places a hand on his back and just lets him breathe until he seems calm again.] Are we good?

Guzma:

I guess… Why, you wanna leave?

Quips: 

I’m in no hurry on a night like this. [Again, he turns his gaze to the stars. It really was a beautiful night, despite the dampened mood of the evening. He half thought he would have recieved some sarcastic retort, but he glances back to see Guzma is also stargazing with a look of uneasiness. The old man turns to him with a warm, paternal tone] You know… I understand they wanted to be nice because I'm a Kahuna, but they really gave me too much space for one person. It’s practically a small apartment. Why don't you stay at my place tonight? I'm sure they'll have a room for you by the time we get sailing. 

Guzma:

[Sourly] Might as well when you've got all my stuff. Ya sure you're not just saying that to keep an eye on me?

Quips: 

[Soft chuckle] Maybe that too. Come on. If it's alright with you, I'd like to hear what else happened today. 

=+=

[Molayne enters his designated quarters, but it will definitely take some time to make it feel like home. Gazing over the bare white walls lined with boxes from the move, he notices that several of them had already been opened. A strange little chime draws his focus away from the mess as a little Beldum flies over to start circling him. At least some things never change. A little squeak nearby reveals a Stuffle running over to investigate.] 

Molayne:

[Kneels down to pet her.] Hello there~ Are the other two asleep? 

Olivia:

At least one of us is. How'd everything go? 

Molayne:

Ah. [Rises up to meet her as she comes over.] I'd like to say you didn't miss much, but I've definitely got some news to share with you. 

Olivia:

Not good news, I'd think, or you would have said so. [Bends down to pick up the tiny bear and cradles her like a cat in her arms. Gently strokes her] 

Molayne:

I hope Ana didn't give you too much grief. I thought if she and I could have worked on settling in together, it would make the transition easier. 

Olivia:

[Waves him off] Oh, don’t be silly. She's an absolute gem. Honestly, I think the kids are handling this better than the adults are. Maybe because for her it's all new and exciting. In fact, the first thing we did when we got here was check out every corner of the place to see what all features it had. Then when I told her which room was going to be hers, she immediately wanted to find a place for her toys. [Gestures at the open boxes] You can see we've been busy looking for all of the ones labeled as her stuff, but we had fun. Got to decorate a little, but most of the evening was spent getting distracted by her dolls. 

Molayne:

[Soft laugh] That doesn't surprise me. Mind if I check on her?

[He slips by and gently opens the door to peer into his daughter's bedroom and make sure she's actually asleep. No bed found yet from the looks of it, but for Anabel, that didn't seem to matter. All of her bedding is laid out on the floor like a cushioned mat and a Jirachi doll has become a pillow. Other toys littered the floor around her as the nearby lamp cast the room in a shade of pink. Poor thing must have wore herself out. It makes him smile to see her sleeping so soundly as one of his biggest concerns had been that she might be overwhelmed after being brought to such a big and strange place like the Aether Paradise. He had hoped to tell her where he was going, but for Olivia's sake, it seemed better to not disturb the girl as long as possible.] 

Olivia:

[A sofa had been discovered and set up in the main area at least. She waits for him to close the door so she can keep her voice low.] You look pretty serious tonight. Plan to tell me what's up? 

=+=

[Now that they're in the privacy of his cramped quarters, Faba quickly shuts the door and locks it.]

Faba:

[Glaring daggers at Dexio's back] I hope you have a good reason for exposing me like that. 

Dexio:

[Almost amused] Only if you can explain how you can work at a company for over fifteen years and never tell your co-workers you have a family. And I wouldn’t say I exposed you to anything since most of them were asking questions about me.

Faba:

You know what I mean. You see what I have to put up with, and instead of painting me in a better light, you joined them in mocking me! 

Dexio:

[Hops up on a barstool and leans back against the counter] How can you call it mocking when I told them the honest truth. At least from where I stand with you. Don't get me wrong, when I saw you on Poni Island, I was happy to see you. And I do want to rebuild my relationships with the family, but that doesn't mean I have to trust any of you while trying to uncover what's real about you all and what's just been rumors and reports I've found over the years. Heck, after what you did here, you're lucky Colress didn't ship you off with your friends to some terrible other reality instead of Aether just downgrading your position. 

Faba:

[Still fuming, but takes this into consideration] Is this stark distrust because of my reputation or should I blame Augustine for that too? 

Dexio:

[Pauses to think about it. A bit saddened] A little of both, I think. I know everyone in my group that I've talked to has had some serious second-guessings when it comes to trusting people outside of the DoK. Between our parents, for those who had them, the Gym Leaders being part of this greater conspiracy with Team Flare, and my personal idol being the professor, could you blame me for being a little hesitant with my alliances now? 

Faba:

[Frowns] You never mentioned in your letters you were so unhappy. 

Dexio:

Because I wasn't. Confused and mystified, maybe, but I had no idea I was just another pawn in the game. My friend, Sina, was another recruit, but she grew suspicious of things first. I didn’t really believe her at first, and only started to realize how wrong everything felt when the plan was being put into action. We didn't even know who among the other students we could trust, so Sina and I started going in disguise to investigate things on our own. If it turned out we were wrong, and Team Flare traced us back to the professor… Well, I guess none of that matters now since it turned out she was right. [Ahem] But even if I had been unhappy at my apprenticeship, I wouldn't expect you to do anything about it. I was alone out there. At most, would you have just pulled me out of there? Sent me to stay with another of your devious colleagues? 

Faba:

[Listening to all this, but appears pleased as he placed a hand under his chin. Intrigued.] You said you used a disguise? 

Dexio:

[Irritated] Dad, please. If you would just listen-

Faba:

[Grins] I am. I'm just appreciating how clever you are. [More serious as he debates how to answer him] You may call them my "friends", but the truth is I have many connections with many, sometimes dangerous people. It's not that I don't tell anyone about you, but personal relationships can be used as collateral when dealing with such people. Especially when things don't go as promised. Putting some distance between us was always a matter of safety, if we should want our line to continue. 

Dexio:

And Mom? 

Faba:

[Impish smirk] How do you think we met? I wasn't lying when I said we tend to be on the move, it just happens that in our business, it's very rarely with each other. 

Dexio:

[Somehow all this isn't what he had hoped to find in coming here, but at the same time, it made a lot of things in his life start to make sense. Still, he had come this far, and wasn't going to walk away now] Then I hope you don't mind if I "distance" myself from you for a while. 

Faba:

Wha-? You mean after going out of my way to secure you a place, you plan on leaving? I'm offering you a chance to put all of that past behind you so we can work together- 

Dexio:

And we will work together. But, like I said, the others have every reason to distrust you, and now that they're aware of our relationship, it might give them reason not to trust me. If I come off as cold with you, it's only because you and I have nothing in common. 

Faba:

[Following the train of thought, he guesses] And disassociating from me might make you more favorable in the eyes of someone like the young master? 

Dexio:

They come to trust me on my own actions, I could work my way up, maybe put in a good word for how the times have changed everyone… including you.

Faba:

[Beaming with pride] See, now you're thinking like me~! 

Dexio:

[Coldly] Oh, but I didn't learn that from you.  [Leans forward on the seat to rest his elbows on his knees and folds his hands as he hesitates on telling him the truth.] Dad, I do appreciate you trying to help me, even if I still feel that underneath it all, you only contacted me for your own benefit. But, even as a bargaining chip, I don't have very many opportunities right now. And with the state of the world that I've been seeing, the options aren't looking too good elsewhere. And… I have my own family to look after now. I need to secure a place for myself so I can hopefully bring them in once we've let some of the others off. 

Faba:

[Clearly caught off guard by this, his voice comes soft] Family? You mean…? 

Dexio:

[Wry grin] I have a daughter back in Orre. And unlike you and Mom, I want to be there for her. Maybe… Maybe give her a chance to know the rest of her family, for better or worse, but just be there. 

Faba:

[Shakes his head] You're setting yourself up for trouble, you know. 

Dexio:

As the Kahuna said, it tends to follow me around. I'll take my chances. 

Faba:

[Can't argue with that.] You also said you've been studying the Shadows? [Curious] I suppose Ein showed you around while you were visiting him. How is he doing, anyway? 

=+=

[Olivia held the large, ornate book in her lap and turned the blank pages to see the beautiful runes as Molayne explained.] 

Olivia:

[Just shakes her head at the story.] Poor Roark… The kid has already had everything taken from him, and now you plan to lock him up with that monster? 

Molayne:

It might be the only way to save him. If Necrozma is using him for a shield, we can't separate them until we have them both physically held somewhere we can pull the boy out of its clutches. [Shifts awkwardly] Legends still being legends, it's possible that the last person Necrozma made a puppet of was sealed along with it, and obviously hasn't been seen since. We don't want it to get to that point. 

Olivia:

And now you and the others are planning to hunt down this thing to seal it. [Holds out the book for him to take it back] Relying on… magic? 

Molayne:

I wish there was a way to make it sound less crazy, but I thought the same thing. Right now we just want to spend the night learning as much as we can about this book and the capture method since the odds of an attack may have increased. Otherwise, the plan is just for me to keep the book on hand and Burnet keeps the mirror while we continue with the evacuation as normal. Maybe, if nothing happens, we can come back for Roark once we get everyone else safe.

Olivia:

[Sighs] I don’t know, Mo, I’ve just got a bad feeling about all this. Besides, we've barely gotten moved in and you're already burning yourself out. 

Molayne:

[Wry grin] And? I'm always burnt out. [He pulls the Item Capsule back out and recalls the book in a white light.] I'll be back before morning, I just wondered if you mind staying a bit longer. I don't want to risk Ana waking up alone if she gets up in the middle of the night. 

Olivia:

[Looks over at the clock by the kitchenette] I don't mind, but are you sure about that? It's already getting close to midnight and you still need to get over there. I don't see how you can get anything done tonight. 

Molayne:

[Nervously rubs at the back of his neck] The same way I get everything else done. You know this is nothing new for me. 

Olivia:

[Softly] Yeah. Which reminds me, have you gotten a chance to see Anabel since you arrived? 

Molayne:

We spent most of the day together. She met Mr. Colress while we were bringing in our stuff. 

Olivia:

Not the little one. 

Molayne:

… … … [Glances away] 

Olivia:

It's fine, I'm sorry. I just wondered since we always told little Ana that her mother had left with Aether, and she did, but the girl needs to find out sooner or later if they're both on board. She needs to meet her mother. 

Molayne:

Of course she should. And she will, in time, it's just… Maybe I'm the one not ready yet. But knowing the risks, there's something I need to ask you. [Reaches across to take Olivia's hand gently in both of his] If… [He hesitates as he can already see the deep concern in her eyes] IF anything should happen to me… Can I entrust my daughter to you? You know she means everything to me. 

Olivia:

[Harsh whisper] Then don't do this! You're an amazing Trainer, but if that thing gets in one good swipe, you'll be-

Molayne:

Which is why I want to do this. For Anabel. [He waits to hear her response, but she just goes quiet. Rising to his feet, he gazes over the still room until his eyes land on the bedroom door] Olivia… I've spent most of my life studying the stars, and my daughter is afraid of the night. She's young enough that all she's ever known is not to make friends, because they might disappear. That sometimes we can't even trust the Pokemon to not to suddenly turn on us. To never be caught in the dark. I don't want that for her. I considered leaving Alola for that exact reason, but how could I? 

Olivia:

[Soft smile] You and Kukui both, I swear. I know you do a lot for us, but believe it or not, Alola can survive without you. 

Molayne:

It's not surviving very well right now either way. And what happens if we leave this beast on the loose? Will it just move on to another region when the food runs out? I understand we all want to put the thought of possibly being the next target far from our minds, but it's something I should have asked you ages ago. [Awkwardly glances back at her] Please. Will you take care of her?

Olivia:

[Still clearly doesn't like the sounds of this, but eases in her stance.] I'll be more than happy to look after her for you. Even now, whenever you need me to, as long as I’m able. But she needs you, and I can't replace that. 

Molayne:

Of course not. Thank you. [Warmly] It may be a big place, but once we leave, my role here is looking to be much smaller than at home. I already told Anabel that when we set sail, we'll be spending a lot more time together. But just in case…

Olivia:

Don’t worry, I will. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N: I couldn't decide if this would be considered important to the plot or not since some of these are just characters taking the already established information to other characters, and others are touching on future plot points. But this did seem to be the best place to put these even if some drabbles are better organized than others. I just like to show things from a different perspective for some of these guys and it's something of a transition to the next night.

Archive

[willowser]

you feel like home (you're like a dream come true)—

bakugou x reader

wc: 3k+

tags: SPOILERS FOR CHAPTER 359+, explicit language, angst, this is trash garbage but it's how i'm coping

Dynamight wins the For-All Selfless Service Award.

A wet, cement-like dread fills your belly at the sound of his name echoing across the atrium, thunderous and so powerful that, for a split-second, you fear it will shatter the glass ceiling.

It's like the awakening of an old God, one that wanted to be left well enough alone; summoning him is a swarm of night-black clouds, filled with ample rain to drown all those that dared disturb his slumber. Not a breath is spared as you all wait for the downfall.

Beside you, Masaru shifts, turning in his chair to peer out over the sea of well-dressed tables and shining Heroes, as if he's lost his own. It's not until Red Riot shuffles sheepishly across the lit stage, waving shyly as he accepts the golden FA Best Jeanist is cradling gently in his hands.

There's a hint of hesitation before the retired Pro relinquishes it, a small exchange that's lost to the low blooming chatter across the ballroom. Kirishima beams a signature smile as he takes it and has to lean down into the mic, like the gentle giant he is.

Almost in unison, the room heaves a collective sigh; disaster avoided.

"I know Dynamight is so honored to receive this…honor,"

It's been a long time since you've seen him.

"So on his behalf, I want to thank everyone that has supported him all these years—"

Been a long time since anyone has.

Bakugou's been out-stationed for a half-decade, maybe more, but you can still remember the tension lining his face in the flat light of the train station. In public, with his parents and friends and their ready goodbyes.

All he'd given you was an insincere glare, half a hug, and a gritted demand to call him later, once he'd arrived at his new agency. It seemed a silly request; he's always been terrible about voicing how he feels, maybe a little smoother on the phone and out of sight, but just as stilted and unsure as ever.

On the high definition screens above the stage, photos of him shuffle, too reminiscent of a memorial to settle your upset. Stills from recorded footage of his takedowns and captures, of his rescues. The same ID picture on his Hero profile, from when he was 22, and his graduation photo. A smile haunts your face; he's never been one for cameras.

Masaru settles back into his seat, straightens his tie and shrugs at the team, who are all watching him with crest-fallen faces. You try to stay neutral, avoiding all their gazes as you fiddle with an eloquently folded napkin on the table.

Like a child, some giddy part of you hoped to see him take the stage, accept the award in all his glory. Unashamed and confident as ever, not so disheartened by his loss, because that's always been Bakugou.

But a small part of you is relieved; he's not a stage monkey and it wouldn't be Bakugou either, to give a rehearsed speech of false thanks. Blowing it off, a fuck you to what remains of the Comission—that's more like it. You want to believe it means some things haven't changed.

The show plays on without another hitch, something that bothers you, and when your coworker leans in to whisper a harmless "I wonder where he's at", you are up and abandoning the table, set on a mission of unknown expectation. The wants in your body are all coalescing into one another—to find him, to never see him again, to come clean about how you feel, whatever that may be—becoming a resounding overlap of voices that set you to autopilot.

You heard his voice last nearly six months ago, when Masaru called his number on speakerphone so the team could sing him a happy birthday. It was met with ill-tempered complaint, irritated at his father blowin' up my phone for nothin', but Masaru was smiley as ever, unaffected.

How jealous you were; if only the tone of his voice could mean so little to you.

It's something you remembered often in the middle of the night, when you would turn to the empty space of your bed and recall how pliable he was, whenever he worked up the courage to stay with you. Bakugou would let you kiss his cheeks or poke at his stomach or hold his hand—little affections he was too resistant to in the daytime. He would always claim to be half-asleep and unaware, but you'll never forget the red gleam of his eyes as he watched you through his long, dark lashes.

When you come into the open lobby of the hotel, you find it astonishing to see his solid figure at the bar-top, suit jacket haphazardly draped over the chair he's in; it's rare that he drinks, only on few occasions with Masaru and the requisite glass of champagne at events such as these—though he doesn't attend many. After everything that's happened, all that's been said in his wake, to see him now is—

Not Godly. Just a man.

You sit to his left, without a word. Maybe if you were a better person, you could say that it was for his benefit, that you're offering the space for him to reveal himself at his own choice—and while those things aren't untrue, the matter of the fact is that you don't think you're ready to see it just yet.

There's only a half-empty glass of water in front of him, and he's drawing lazy, mindless doodles into the frost with his left hand. His right arm is still entirely bandaged, wrapped up in a sling he's keeping close to his chest.

If he recognizes you at all when you sit down, he acknowledges nothing, minutely raising a shoulder as if to curl further into himself. The bartender takes your request for a glass of water, too, and at the sound of your timid voice, Bakugou stills completely.

For a long time, you've thought about this moment. What you would say upon seeing him again. There's a script somewhere in the ridges of your mind that's been perfected, one you've poured over and over again on sleepless nights, when you felt alone and angry and hated him.

The last full conversation the two of you had was set up similarly; chock-full of tension, trying to hide from the obvious as it made space between you. How unfair it felt, to be mad over something that hadn't gotten the chance to blossom just yet.

No point in tryin'. Gonna be gone for, shit, I don't know. Should just find someone else.

You felt ashamed for loving him so badly. For wanting him more than anything and being unwilling to voice it.

All you care to say now is, "It's so good to see you again."

It directs him to you immediately, though when you dare to look up, he turns, ducking his chin on his right side. The very notion of it makes you sick; not the wreckage itself, but what it's done to him, how it must make him feel if he can't even look at you.

To be so afraid of it initially wells a guilt the size of his tight fist in your chest. How selfish. How vain.

Bakugou tries to speak, but has to clear his throat once. "You—got some weird thing with my dad, or what?"

You let out a sudden spark of laughter, bewildered at the question. You make a face, considering, and take a sip of water. "I mean, he is pretty handsome."

"You're disgusting."

A balloon of relief airs in your lungs as you laugh again; some things never change. From the corner of his eye, the sound draws his attention again, gaze jumping from your face to your dress and back to the safety of his glass.

"No," you tell him, "I'm on his team designing costumes, and stuff."

A wave of embarrassment washes over you that he didn't even know about your career. With as much time as your work squad spends with the Bakugou family, you would think that you would have been mentioned, at least once.

In fact, you're certain it must have been brought up; Masaru cares too much. Buys you special edition mugs on your birthday and brings coffee for everyone on those early mornings, is the last to leave some days. On the news that morning, when they'd broadcasted the battle—Dynamight's Downfall?—you were the first person he'd looked at before rushing off to find his wife.

Either Bakugou never wanted to hear about it, you, or he's just scrounging for conversation.

Silence settles as you ponder. When you come back to the here and now, you take in what you can of him; the smooth plane that he allows you of his face, the few faint scars that have appeared in the time since you last were together; his hair is a little shorter now, albeit just as ashen and wild, not tamed in the slightest; the top two open buttons of his shirt, and the tie that barely hangs around his neck. You're surprised he even put it on.

It dawns on you how much he must have changed over the years, even before all this. How much you've missed. Traitorous tears sting the backs of your eyes and you have to sniff to keep a handle on your composure, and not a second of it goes unnoticed by Bakugou; you become aware of the anxious jerk of his leg as he bounces it, how he shifts and curls and clears his throat.

Begrudgingly, he murmurs, "'m not takin' that damn award."

You hum with assent, leaning forward to cross your arms on the bar, prop your chin in your palm. "I don't blame you, it's like," you shake your head, thinking, "'Thank you for your service. Sorry you almost died.'"

He huffs out a laugh, shaking his head as he takes a drink of water. "For fucking real."

You'd said it carelessly as a joke to ease the tension, settle the nerves bubbling in your stomach, but now that the words are out, the mention has you feeling ill again.

It's all anyone has been talking about for days: Bakugou’s damage, how much he must have suffered, how he'll never be the same again. To hear it, and then to speak of the calamity to the man himself—it adds weight, that slow-drying cement.

Selfishly, you think of him before, when you were both young and standing at the precipice of something neither of you knew how to handle. If you'd known what you know now, you wouldn't have let him walk away. You wouldn't have agreed quietly, broke your own heart because you were afraid.

Another wave of emotions swallows you, and no matter how fast you blink or how far back you tilt your head, the tears rise and fall.

If you speak any louder than a whisper, you'll crack. "I was with your dad that day, we all were, because he always leaves the news on, you know? Keeps it—keeps it muted in the workshop, and when he—when the volume went up and we all looked and—" you frown, hard and dissolving, and hate how it must make you look. "And all I could think about was all the things I never said to you that I—"

In a flash, Bakugou shoves away from the bar, grabbing his jacket as he rounds the chair and mutters, "I can't listen to this right now."

You have to slap a hand over your mouth to hold back the sob that threatens to ruin you, but the fissures run deep, echo down to your bones.

Some things never change; he's always had one foot out the door with you, ready to run at the first sign of that all-encompassing feeling he didn't know how to escape. On the rare nights he allowed himself to spend with you—even then he wore a deep frown, tucked his face into the crook of your neck as if he wanted to stay buried there. Held you tightly, enough to leave little reminders long after he was gone.

The first time he'd kissed you, he shouldn't have and you both knew that. After graduation, waning in the shadow of his looming departure. The shitty studio apartment you rented, that cost more than it was worth; Kirishima and Bakugou agreed to help move what few things you had at the dorms, what was left over at your parent's house. It wasn't much, but the process went much smoother with the two of them.

You'd spent most of the summer together, by chance, and all of your efforts went into diverting the feelings that threatened to grow under your surface. Most everyone that you knew was quick to issue a warning: Bakugou wasn't interested. In all the time they'd known him in school, very little of his attention went to girls and dating, and setting your sights on him was a doomed task.

At that point, you'd refused to acknowledge that's what you'd done; Bakugou made sure everyone got home safely and not just you; he got lunch with Kiri and Mina just as often as you two did; he didn't look at you in the dark any special way, so close on the couch as a movie danced on the TV screen.

It must have been an accident—that's what you tried to tell yourself for a long time.

After the boxes were moved in and Kirishima was gone, he stood in your tiny kitchen and claimed to hate it. Opened the cabinets and poked at your oven and tested the temperature of your freezer, looked through the narrow window that offered a view of—nothing: the back of a small pharmacy.

You asked him what was wrong and his face twisted up, like he was going to be sick or cry and then he grabbed you. Hands trembling against your face and tangling in your hair, lips clumsy and harsh, furious like always. Like it was his last chance.

Half a decade later, more than, and you still swell at the thought of him.

You wipe a hand under your eyes gingerly, wary of your airbrushed makeup, before sliding off the chair. The rest of the team has probably conjured up all manner of conspiracies as to where you are, and perhaps you should tell Masaru of his son's state.

When you turn to retreat, however, Bakugou is standing there. Not ten feet from you, like he meant to run before thinking better of it. Fully open. Bare.

Human.

The right half of his face is still tender, shiny and raw, and his eye is ringed in red. It's jarring; Bakugou has always been a pretty boy, despite his animosity towards the label, and the tabloids stay littered with mentions of him and his dangerously good looks.

There's been nothing but speculation about how he's come out and you'd been admittedly nervous, because you were afraid to find that you were more vain than you'd ever known, unable to look upon what remains of the boy you knew.

But to see it so blatant; the untouched side of his face in comparison to what's been war-torn.

All you can think is—

"I'm so glad you're still here."

You don't miss the shine that waters his left eye or how hard he swallows, averting his gaze even further. When you step up to him, he doesn't resist you, only lets out a breath you feel as you run your hands across the marble of his chest.

Despite everything, you waver with a watery laugh that captures him again, because you mean it. All the years and anger and hope and terror and silence and waiting—it holds no candle to him, here and alive and looking at you as he did in your kitchen that day.

Carefully as you can, you wind yourself up in him, around his sling and neck and pressed as close as you can be, and it's not until you nose against his throat that he wraps his arm around you. Tight, like it might be his last chance.

"You," he murmurs, and you can feel how hard he's clenching his jaw from the way it digs into your cheek. "And the shit you didn't say?" Bakugou breathes in sharply, unaware of how deep his fingers dig into the skin your dress exposes. "All I could think about is what I did say, how fuckin' stupid—"

I'm leavin', so don't—I can't—just, don't expect anything from me.

All the long nights and dropped calls and heartbreak and distance—it holds no candle to him, here and alive and looking down at you through his dark, wet lashes.

You slip up onto your toes and kiss him as you've wanted to for years, as you were too afraid to; fingers gentle against his cheek, thumbing the edge of his jaw, passing all that you've kept from him through slow and purposeful lips.

It takes him off guard, which you expected, but only a moment passes before he's gripping you with intent, melding into you as his trembling hand goes to your neck. You can't help the smile you curl into, one he feels, and Bakugou huffs, annoyed, before slanting his head, parting your lips with his own as he dissolves.

It's foreign now, to what it was years ago. Unhurried, no longer afraid, giving instead of taking all that he could hold in both hands. Half a decade later, maybe more, and you swell at the promise of him, the thud of his still-beating heart as it echoes in your chest.

And then there's a loud roar of applause from down in the award show room and you freeze, suddenly put back into place as the sound of glasses clinking and heels on the tile and murmured conversation surrounds you.

"Sorry," you gasp, trying—and failing—to pull away as his hold tightens. Insistent, like it will never slacken again. "We're in public."

"Don't care," Bakugou rasps, gently butting his forehead against your own as he sighs, great and lax and slow. Just before he goes to kiss you again, he says, "'m just glad I'm still here."

[antiherometalau]

CHAPTER 1 - HARD RESET

[METAL FIRMWARE VERSION: 1.3]

[SETUP COMPLETE.]

[SYSTEM STARTUP INITIATED...]

At first, the world came to him in black and red. Lines of wireframe marked the perspective of the room- representing each minuscule dent in the wall- each tool or miscellaneous piece of machinery strewn about the room- each detail of a mustached man's face, staring at him intently, with a wide grin and jovial look plastered on his features.

Then, an explosion of color- further refining each of the world's details- the greyness of the metal vent covers, the vibrant blues of the sky outside the viewport window- the characteristic red tint of the man's nose.

As his vision processes completed their final startup checks- the rest of his mind came into action. His facial recognition software jolted into motion, and he recognized the man to be his creator, Doctor Ivo Robotnik. His auxiliary sensors burst to life- the silent droning noise of machinery filling his artificial ears and the feeling of hard steel beneath his talons filling his false nerves.

And then, at last, his primary systems came online.

[METAL SYSTEMS ONLINE.]

[PRIMARY DIRECTIVE: SURPASS SONIC THE HEDGEHOG.]

[SECONDARY DIRECTIVE: PROTECT DOCTOR ROBOTNIK AND THE EGGPIRE.]

[TERTIARY DIRECTIVE: eggLang.exception.null]

[INQUIRY: WHAT HAPPENED?]

Through the reflection in the man's glasses- Metal watches his inquiry appear on a screen behind him. He notes that he happens to be wired into the base's systems at the moment- and that his frame is pristine, as if it were brand new.

He notes that it may, in fact, be brand new.

"Ah, Metal! You're conscious! I really need to invest in faster drives- your startup sequence took a very long time..."

Eggman clears his throat.

"Anyways- you sustained very heavy damage in your last fight with that blasted hedgehog- too, heavy damage, really. It wasn't... worth it, per say, to repair your previous frame- so I have transferred you into a new one! Go on, get a feel for it! I've included many features you previously lacked- before you ask, no, still no voice chip. I've been having issues getting those working..."

Metal raises a clawed hand into his vision, staring downwards. He's taller now- presumably to not be outdone by the loathsome organic copy, who had been growing steadily over the years- his turbine is in pristine condition, and he has the most curious sense of touch, now. He reaches over with his other hand- experiencing the feeling of dragging his claw against his palm- the sharp, biting sensation.

It is most intriguing. He turns to his creator with as much of a look of gratitude as he can muster. Unfortunately, his expressions are rather limited- but he hopes the message is gotten across regardless.

"I'm glad you enjoy your upgrades! You know, I never realized just how behind you were with my technology- I mean, I haven't given you any proper touch ups in... well, too long! For my greatest creation, you were overdue for an overhaul."

Greatest creation. The praise is somewhat lost on the machine, however, it appreciates it regardless. It nods hesitantly- attempting to disconnect itself and stand up.

"Woah, woah now. Calm down there, Metal- you're still not calibrated for these new systems- it may be a bit hard to-"

Metal feels as the cables disconnect, and plummets to the floor. His legs seem to operate on different control schemes, now.

After a moment of re-calibration- Metal feels the servos in his legs straining to pull him back upright. They succeed, and he reorients himself- his optical scanners intaking the rest of the room as he turns to Robotnik, awaiting further instruction.

"Eager to get back to it, huh? Well- unfortunately, I've got nothing for you to do right now. Say- why don't you go orient yourself around the base? These forests can be confusing to navigate..."

--------------

Flying through the trees was... difficult. Too difficult for Metal's liking.

He was still adjusting to his new chassis- and his old turbine was simply inadequate to carry him at the speeds he was used to- much to his chagrin. He felt weighed down- a feeling he was not going to get used to for a while.

[CRUISING VELOCITY REACHED.]

That was it? This was his turbine's cruising speed? Despite his speedometer reading quite the velocity, he felt like he was hardly at a jogging pace. No- this simply wouldn't do. He began to try and push his turbine further-

His speed gradually increased, however, the stress on his body increased in turn. As he began to rocket between the trees and brush- his turbine's overthrottle was starting to drain on it-

[WARNING: MAXIMUM SAFE VELOCITY REACHED.]

THIS was his limit? No. Disregarding the warning- he continued to try and speed up- his turbine struggling to meet his ever increasing demands...

Finally. This was befitting of him. He soared through the air at breakneck speeds- but his systems couldn't handle it for long- and as quickly as that euphoria arrived...

[OVERHEAT. EMERGENCY SHUTTING DOWN TURBINES.]

Metal began to rapidly lose speed- his speedometer tanking as he came to a stumbling halt amongst the brush. He curses himself as he feels the heat of his turbine stifling the air around him- and light smoke emitting from the back of it. The doctor would not be pleased with him damaging his new shell already... and he was not pleased with himself, either.

He had let his need for speed get ahead of orders.

[ERROR NOTED. RESOLVING.]

He wouldn't again.

However- it still lingered within him- and, with his turbine engine now under duress- he couldn't rely on it to carry him home. Though it DID seem that his legs had gotten an upgrade- their control schemes must have been different for a reason. And so- he began to run, normally- back through the forest, towards the base. He had taken a bit of a winding path coming here, but returning in a straight line was optimal- and he didn't wish to discover the limits of his legs by dallying about as that would leave him stranded.

Revving to life- he sprints onward- slashing branches and thistles out of the way with his sharp claws- and, nearly passing through a clearing- when something calls for him to stop. His heavy metal shoes dig into the ground as he skids to a halt- the opening within the trees giving way to quite the scenic view of hills in the distance.

But that was not why he had stopped- no. He had stopped because of the pink mass of pixels in his visual scanners- leaning against a tree across the breach.

--------------

Amy was tired. She'd been hard at work for days- assisting Tails with his newest project, of which the two-tailed fox seemed to never sleep on- and she was desperately in need of a break. Preferably, one out of the way of everyone for a while...

And luckily, she had just the spot! Sneaking out of Tails' workshop- he had passed out on his desk again, and she had laid a blanket over his shoulders- she makes her way out of the town and into the forests. She has a basket held in her hands- containing a picnic blanket and a few small food items for her to snack on while she distracts herself from her life's recent stresses.

As she paces through the brush, she hears a low rumble in the distance- but pays it no mind, assuming it to merely be something from Tails' workshop- that she did NOT wish to deal with right now. She reaches her clearing, and takes a seat beneath one of the towering trees- laying out her picnic blanket and sighing.

The morning passes by and the afternoon arrives- and, having finished the small lunch she brought for herself, she packs up the basket and simply sits, taking in the sounds around her with her eyes closed.

The chirp of birds! The ribbit of a distant frog- the racket of crickets in the grass, and-

The soft thud of heavy weight against the dirt. Confused, her eyes snap open, and she turns to the source of the noise-

Only to see Metal approaching her. She panics- stumbling back a bit- and raises a hand to block her face...

It was taking a long time to capture her as it usually did. She slowly lowered her arm, meeting the scary gaze of the robot, both locked in a moment of confused silence.

"...Aren't ya gonna... k-kidnap me, or somethin'...?"

The robot shakes its head- beeping negatively.

"Oh..."

Somehow, she understands this beep fully.

"Well! I'm not busy-"

She pats the grass next to her, and scoots to the side slightly.

"I've got time to listen."

--------------

Confused, Metal took a seat next to the pink hedgehog- not even really understanding why he had listened to the command. He, unsurprisingly, ends up not being the one to talk as much- and simply sits there, an odd feeling of contentedness within his matrices as he listened to Amy Rose vent about her recent frustrations and gush over every little thing. He expressed some visible annoyance when she spoke of his loathsome copy- which, he noted, managed to pull a giggle from her.

Why was she acting so... [DEFINITION FOUND]- amicable towards him?

[NOTE ADDED: AMY ROSE]

[CONFUSING.]

He found himself staring at her blankly- taking in each minute detail of her appearance. By the time she had stopped talking, he was convinced he could create a full, 3D model exclusively from the data collected by his sensors- and he wasn't entirely sure why. He convinces himself that it was due to the organic notion of eye contact during conversations.

Eventually, she had run out of things to say, and she sighed tiredly. The afternoon sun was now beginning to droop- and his turbine had thankfully cooled down in the interim. He began to devise a route to return to base, however, her annoyingly cheery voice interrupted his inner machinations-

"Well- it was nice to have someone here to listen to my ranting, for once!"

...He simply lets out a computerized tone in response.

"Yeah, well, even if you say you don't care- I can see through you, silly robot!"

See through him? Had he become translucent somehow? No. That was illogical. His apparent confusion caused her to emit another giggling sound-

"Anyways... thanks!"

She grabs hold of the interwoven wood basket beside her, standing and waving to him cheerfully as she sprints off back towards, presumably, her 'base of operations'- her home, Metal recalls.

...

[NOTE ADDED: AMY ROSE]

[CONFUSING | INTRIGUING]

With that, Metal stands back up- his servos snapping out of their stillness, and he carefully fires up his turbine engine- flying back to home turf, mind lost in thought.

He had no idea at that time what exactly was to come- or that this would not be the last instance of a chance encounter with that pink hedgehog.

As he re-entered the secret outpost, he noted that his creator was consumed in his work- and, as per protocol, decided not to disturb him with his return. He simply paced silently through the hall- past the crowded workshops and into a small, side room- built just for him. A charging bay contained within it was his target- and it had been recently upgraded to fit his new height. Slotting into the capsule, his visual feed cuts out as he seals himself away for the day.

[ENTERING SLEEP MODE.]

[hermitcraftheadcanons]

Scattered AU Masterpost Part 1

This is a collection of all material associated with the Scattered AU (read about the premise here)!

Join the new Discord server here

AU material under the cut (because this is growing super fast already)

Due to post length limit (which is apparently a thing), find Part 2 of this AU here.

A few ideas to get us started:

- Tango and Zedaph spawned relatively close to each other, but they haven't found each other yet and each think they are alone. They keep just barely missing each other in their exploration of the area. Maybe, with the powers of Zed's perfect sense of direction and Tango's laser-sharp perception skills, they'll finally stop walking circles around each other...maybe.

- Xisuma spawned alone, deep underground in a massive, confusing cave system. He desperately wants to figure out what's going on and how to fix it, but a bad run-in with the Warden damaged his helmet, leaving him unable to use admin commands.

- Mumbo spawned the farthest out of anyone, right next to a woodland mansion. He quickly realized that hoping to stumble across another person this far out is a lost cause, so he's trying to create some form of communication using a combination of redstone and Evoker magic. The Evoker isn't very helpful, and it isn't going well.

- Joe and Vintagebeef were the only ones to successfully spawn at spawn. They aren't really sure what's going on, but they've decided to build a small village as a base of operations while they figure it out (and to signal signs of life to anyone who might successfully find their way back)

- Cleo spawned in a village, and is currently hiding out in a house while trying to convince the villagers to trust her. Let's just say they aren't thrilled to have a zombie in their midst (and the iron golem is even less pleased)

- Impulse had the misfortune to spawn in a guardian temple. Between the guardians and the constant threat of drowning, he's been in a death loop since the world started.

- False and Stress spawned right next to each other. They figured out pretty early that something was wrong with regen, and using their combined strengths, they made it to the Nether to get ingredients for healing potions. They are now on a mission to find the others and distribute the potions to whoever needs them.

- Ren actually managed to travel a good distance back to the world center, before getting pretty badly injured. With no regen, and knowing he'll have to start the journey all over if he dies and respawns, he's decided to pull together a small base and take shelter while he waits to be found.

- Scar spawned on an outer End island, with no idea how to get back to the Overworld. He keeps finding strange glitches in his surroundings, and he swears he can hear soft Vex laughter whenever he turns his back...

- Keralis spawned in the Nether, and he is absolutely terrified.

That's all I have for ideas so far. The location of the others (and what happens next) is up to you!

Contributions so far:

- Bdubs spawns in the void, but he just doesn’t die. Maybe it’s spawn protection, maybe it’s the glitches, but he just keeps falling and falling and falling further from the bedrock, unable to do anything to help himself as he descends further into the void

- @fluffy-papaya

- After wandering around aimlessly for days or maybe weeks, Tango finds an automatic farm for... well... he's not sure, exactly. But he does know who built it- it's got Zedaph's mark all over it. So he stays there, fixing broken Redstone, trying to figure out what it does. And when Zedaph returns to collect melons (so that's what this thing is for), he finds Tango waiting for him.

- @rayveewrites

- Etho spawns in a underwater cave, but there is air in it and for some reason a shipwreck so he can get some wood and tools. But he has to get out to contact anyone because the reception in caves don't happen to be the best, little does he know just outside the cave is the monument where Impulse is, they're so close yet so far from one another

- anonymous

- Maybe Etho ended up spawning at the very top of a mountain, he could see far from up there and has a general idea of where he is, but no idea how to get down as all around him is powderd snow hiding ravines, and cliffs. . . And a few goats that Etho has narowly avoided getting headbutted by. (Etho went to the mountain after escaping the cave)

- @ciaravixen

- Welsknight spawned in the Nether

- (paraphrased) Ren fell down a ravine in the mountains on his journey to the world center, and decided to make a small cabin base rather than try to carry on injured. Doc spawned in those same mountains, and may find him eventually.

- anonymous

- Grian spawns on the tallest peak of the highest mountain. Surrounded by thick fog and almost ever-falling snow, with crevasses and cliffs that drops thousands of blocks to the ground around every corner. No trees, no life, and barely enough air to breath. It's so cold. A thin red sweater isn't nearly enough to keep him warm.... he's likely caught in a death loop for quite awhile as he refreeze over, and over, and over again. And when he does manage to climb down, an ice pillager lies in wait...

- @therainofsweetmelody

- Scar’s End spawn is on a single island- he can see other islands around him, but they’re just out of jump reach- he tried, and fell and died, and respawned back onto his little island with the whispering voices around him a tad louder, and the islands just a bit farther away. He stops trying to jump to them eventually, out of fear they’ll vanish and he won’t have anything to focus on besides the whisper of ice cold hands and wings on his skin

- anonymous

- Oh! Maybe since Xisuma’s admin helmet is broken and he’s unable to run any world commands, that means mob hermits like Cleo, Doc, and Jevin aren’t quite the same. Maybe Cleo locked herself in that house for the villagers protection as much as her own. Maybe Doc eventually joins a lone creeper pack. Who knows! -💧

- anonymous

- Zed and Tango spawned in the same jungle biome, explaining the melon farm and why they could be literally three blocks from each other and still not be aware of each other’s existence. -🟣

- The first thing Scar does once he first spawns in (besides from almost having a panic attack) is take a jump into the void. This of course does nothing. He checks out the rest of the end islands around him, and finds a rather large end city just in render distance. There should be treasure or something that could help him survive, right? -🟣

- Keralis was lucky enough to spawn in a warped forest biome and next to a basalt delta, so he’s got wood and stone. It takes a bit, but he gets full gold armor and finds his way to a nether fortress. He figures with the broken regen that the other hermits will try to go for potions. Maybe he finds Stress and False, maybe not. -🟣

- I apologize if I'm sending too many asks, please feel free to say if so! I'm just already so invested in this idea, and absolutely love where it's all going! Shattered au brainrot go brrrrr - anyways; Cub spawns in a valley within the messa. To one side an abandoned village covers the cliff, and to the other, mines drill deep into the rock. A stream luckily runs through the valley, though it's slowly drying up. He can hear strange sounds in the mines, and feels something in the village watching

- @/therainofsweetmelody

- what if the hermits caught in death loops start gaining scars and marks from all their deaths? like impulse had permanent scars from the guardians and grian’s hands are permanently blue from freezing to death all the time

- anonymous

- X finds some axoloyls in a lush cave and falls in love. He gets some wood from said cave and gets some buckets so he can keep them -🟣

- Cleo gets stuck in a death loop with the iron golem, who is blind to her not attacking the villagers. One of the smarter villagers realizes she’s not fighting back, and calls the golem off. -🟣

- (paraphrased) After the iron golem is called off, Stress and False find Cleo badly hurt in the village house. They make sure she's comfortable and safe before going to the Nether to get potions, where they find a battered Keralis and carry him back. They turn the house into a little hospital while they brew potions and take care of Cleo and Keralis until they're strong enough to move on.

- anonymous

- Stress and False have set up a Nether Portal near a Nether Fortress, for easy escape to the relative safety of the Overworld. Keralis has never been more relieved in his life than when he found that portal.

- @/rayveewrites

- Doc spawned a thousand blocks away from ren, not knowing hos friend was there he happened to go in that direction. He managed to get materials, tools and food for himself before he sees rens little hut

- anonymous

- Jevin was one of the luckier hermits, when it came to where he spawned. He woke up in the shallow green waters of a floral cave, illuminated by glowing rocks and berries. He wasn't... quite alone. Although no other hermits could be seen, he quickly found a small family of axolotl living in the closed-off cave. They became his companions as he tried to assess his situation, and served as comfort when he realised his communicator was almost useless. Being slime, the environment was very welcoming

- @/therainofsweetmelody

- Xb spawns in the middle of a desert, with not even a village in sight. While he's used to being in distant lands with limited resources, he's very much not used to it on the Hermitcraft server with limited contact to the others. As the nights go by and the sands grow more hostile thanks to never-burning husks, he grows more and more lonely.

-@/basaltdragon

- At first, Doc is elated when he spawns on a mountain surrounded by goats. That is, until he discovers that none of his fellow hermits are there with him. After being headbutted down the mountain into the snowy tundra below and left on precariously low health, he hunkers down in a nearby igloo. But it's not exactly easy in a food-scarce biome when his only contacts are two villagers and the horde of strays that gather outside each night...

-@crows-in-space

- in one sense of the word, scar is safe. There's enough chorus fruit on the island to keep him alive, and despite his concerns the enderman don't even bat an eye at him. Theoretically, he could survive for longer than many of the others. But the whispers keep nagging at him, pushing him closer and closer to the edge. Sure, he could survive, but how long could he stay on this deathly quiet piece of land before someone would find him? He can see the faint outline of an End City on one of the fading islands, and every passing moment it haunts him. If he could just give in for a moment, let the powers of the vex harness his body for just a few seconds, maybe he could make it over and gather some gear- maybe even an elytra- and then he'd be set. But fear and logic talk him out of it. He's made deals with the vex before, and that quick trip across the islands could put him in a much more dangerous position than only being stranded...

- @/crows-in-space

- What if after scar gives up, he finds his vex mask lying on the floor with a tag saying ‘do it, it’ll help you get across’ (shade's note: Scar does it)

- anonymous

- For the Scattered AU: Scar gets an elytra, and after much internal struggling he decides to take a chance and leap into the darkness for hope of finding another island. During his terrifying glide he hears a distant scream from the void that is so familiar, but he can't quite place it, and he's in no hurry to risk flying any lower to check it out. - M

- @petrichormeraki

- Iskall and doc's robotic eye glitch out so they don't have any depth vision, so no mater where they spawn, they Are bound to die a few times from missinterprating how far away an Arrow or trident is, and how fast something is coming at them.

- @/ciaravixen

- I initially thought of this for Ren, but since there was already an idea for him, it could probably work for Iskall instead; He spawns in the middle of a scorching desert. Dunes of sand for as far as the eye can see, with barely a cactus or dead Bush in between. No water, no life - only the ever-present heat of the sweltering sun, and the large skeletons everywhere. He manages to find an abandoned temple after days of dragging himself through the sand, and spies a desert village on the horizon

- @/therainofsweetmelody

- Scattered AU! The way the "not killing Bdubs in his own spawn in the void" glitches work is similar to the forgiving void mod works where when you hit the bottom of the void you are teleported to the top instead of taking damage, but since Bdubs can't see anything in the void he doesn't know this (beyond a constant falling) feeling until he manages to "fall forward" enough to find some end islands, he finds scar this way but is so excited to see him he died from fall damage right in front of him

- @theclockworkowl

- (Scattered AU) Piggybacking off the death loop scars ask, when/if Bdubs is rescued from the void, he's in ROUGH shape. His external limbs are blackened and freezing with frostbite from the void (voidbite?), and his bones are permanently weakened from his form being subjected to the cold abyss for so long. Bdubs needs to relearn gravity after falling for so long, and doesn't use elytra anymore. The solid ground under his feet is something he'll never sacrifice for convenience ever again. - M

- @/petrichomeraki

- Wels spawned in a giant crimson forest in the nether. Towering mushroom trees, thick red vines, with piglins and hoglins he constantly has to run away from. But he finds something.... interesting as he's exploring. A house has been built into a wall, a mixture of nether and overworld blocks. Stepping inside, someone clearly lives there - someone who's not a piglin. Imagine his surprise (and relief) when a certain familair knight walks through the door. "Helsknight?"

-@/therainofsweetmelody

- xB wakes up in a dripstone cavern. It's damp and cold and the spikes are very tall, forming a sort of natural cage around him. At the very least, zombies and mobs can't get through, but the longer he stays there, the weirder the sounds get. There... wasn't a new mob for the dripstone caves, right? Right? (i'm trying VERY hard not to do new hermit OR crossover headcanons for scattered au. i swear) ~@betweenlands

- Scattered AU! Everyone Etho dies He spawns in a new place, first it was the underwater cave, then it was the top of a mountain, but it wasn't until he spawned inside an ocean monument and saw impulse trying to escape just as he was dying he realise the importance of the pattern, He was cycling though each of the other hermits spawn locations, which made all the wierd almost hermit made wierdnes make sense, the underwater one was his but the mountain was Grian's spawn spot,

- @/theclockworkowl

- Can the hermits see death messages? (They can) I'm imagining the potential angst of that, where normal world messages (achievements, commands, deaths) go through just fine but the others can't chat. The helplessness of watching their friends' names endlessly filling the chat and having no idea where they are, having no clue how to help, not even being able to offer comfort.

- @/basaltdragon

- Someone had mentioned xisuma also ending up in a floral cavern with axolotl, right? What if this was the same cave Jevin found himself stuck in? After days and days of clawing at stone, xisuma finally breaks into a cavern filled with faint light. After discovering the friendly acolotls, he notices a strange blue mass floating in the water.... and is almost startled to death when he sees the skull faintly showing through the slime, and the familiar wobbly voice coming from it. "Xisuma?"

- Doc and Grian (and later on, ren) spawned on the same mountain. Grian, of course, at the very top: stuck in the endless snowpeak, towering high above the clouds. Doc, meanwhile, ended up at the base, surrounded by snow and goats and giant taiga trees as far as the eye could see. Once Ren got stuck in the ravine, he often heard a familiar scream before a sickening splat every now and again, as the ravine lies almost completely below the highest peak. He's afraid to check his communicator.

- @/therainofsweetmelody

- grian’s practically given up since there’s not much for him to do. there’s no food and his hands are too frozen to mine. a little fox stays by his side at least. he’s about to freeze again and his health is low and he hears crumching footsteps approaching. he assumes its the iceologer coming for him but instead he hears “grian?” and he can make out blurry figures before he passes out and wakes up wrapped up in a blanket infromt of a fire. (whoevers managed to find and rescue him is up to you :D) (Shade's notes: the person who found him was Doc, and he took him back to Ren's cabin to warm up)

- anonymous

- Scar isn't the only one changed by the time he reaches spawn. Impulse drags himself up onto land finally, breathing heavily, and there's something different about him. Sharper teeth. The shadow he casts more inconsistent. Always faintly smells like saltwater. And his eyes glow faintly, a pale washed-out non-color like light at the bottom of the ocean. Something suggesting nonhuman geometry. Something sleeping that had to reawaken to escape. ~@betweenlands

- Eventually, Etho spawns in a jungle. By a complete stroke of luck, he sees the smoke of a campfire. Tango and Zedaph are happy to see someone- anyone- else. Especially when it turns out Etho somehow managed to get the coordinates of a certain Ocean Temple. Sure, it's far, but they can make it. After all, there's an 'I' in team ZIT, and they aren't leaving him behind.

- @/rayveewrites

- (summary of a couple different writing peices) After escaping the Guardian Temple, Impulse set out to find any other Hermit he could. He has gained some unnerving qualities and abilities that he doesn't really understand, but he's trying not to think about that right now. After defeating several mobs he should not have been able to defeat with his level of progress, he now possesses one Totem of Undying. He met up with Zedaph, Tango, and Etho on their way to find him. They are now hosting him at their campsite and are glad he is safe, but Etho is unnerved and suspicious of his more unsettling attributes.

- I had sent this idea right after the inbox closed, rip. But anyways - what if mumbo ended up befriending the evokers and pilligers in the woodland mansion? Of course, it wouldnt be like that at first- the constant death to the axes and swords and magic, the growls and yelling and cursed glares. But he always came back to work on the redstone and evoker magic in a desperate attempt to contact the others. Eventually, the evoker stops sending their vex, and the pilligers stop swinging their weapons

- @/therainofsweetmelody

- (Scattered AU) After Scar gives in to the Vex. Bdubs is barely conscious to begin with; dying to the void so many times really took it out of him in every way possible. But when he is awake, what he sees makes him scared. Scar with faded, cold eyes. Scar with transparent wings, gone in a blink. Scar being able to do things he shouldn't. Scar says it's to get them out of there, but every day he gets a little paler, a little colder, and Bdubs grows more worried. - M

- @/petrichomeraki

- Perhaps xb and Iskall are on opposite ends of the same desert? On one side, high sand dunes covering miles, with a single desert temple and isolated desert village hidden amongst the cliffs and hills. On the other, the deep flatt valley next to a Mesa mountain, flat nothingness stretching far past the horizon. It would still take quite a long time for them to find each other, but at least there's a change they could meet... and, perhaps, over that mountain, cub could be somewhere in the mesa

-@/therainofsweetmelody

- Iskall and Xb eventually find each other in the desert. Sunburned, dehydrated, and sand-blasted, they hug when they first meet despite not knowing each other well. And they try their best not to die, because what are the chances they'll ever find each other again? Two heads are better than one for finding their way to the rest of the hermits.

-@/basaltdragon

- Its probably a week or so of falling before bdubs managed to move enough to finally see the end islands just barely rendering in the distance. As someone had mentioned, perhaps he became so hopeful that he missed his mark, hitting the ground with a sickening splat just blocks beside scar. It took bdubs almost another week to get forward enough to see the islands again. This time, he landed right on scar... sending the vex back to his spawn several islands away, and leaving bdubs alone for days

-@/therainofsweetmelody

- While Bdubs and Scar are more than happy to have found each other again, their moments together are tense and filled with gaps of uncomfortable silence. There's an unspoken agreement hanging over them: Scar doesn't question Bdubs' frozen and frail state, and Bdubs pretends not to notice how Scar's skin has gotten pale and ghost-like, or how he glances behind him often, like he's being followed by a shadow only he can see. Though of course, Bdubs does notice. The whole server does. Grian wakes up in a cold sweat from a dream of Scar's ruthless attempts to destroy the mycelium resistance. Cub feels his own ties to the vex magic acting up once again, now worrying more than ever what Scar may have encountered in this broken world. Even Mumbo's evoker friend begins acting different, though Mumbo can't seem to determine whether it's out of excitement or fear...

-@/crows-in-space

- Scattered AU After the Wels meeting Hels Headcanon I imagine maybe Hels offers a deal to insure his safety on the Hermitcraft Server in exchange for Wels safety in the Nether. Wels very reluctantly agrees adding to the deal that Hels won’t hurt anyone. To bad he didn’t notice his Evil counterpart cross his fingers while shaking on it.

- anonymous

- Scattered AU:  TFC spawns on the main end island, dragon and all. With out proper preparation he’s been stuck in a death loop since the world’s start. Sometimes, right before he dies, he wishes that the janky respon would de-age his body; he’s not the agile young man who could take down the dragon solo anymore.

- @liagrace-b

- Scattered!Grian can’t fly. His normal down-featherly wings look like every feather has been plucked off, leaving the very sensitive skin open to the elements. But the world’s code itself has altered the physics of the wings themselfs. Grian can feel how much heavier the wing structure sits on his back, meaning that they couldn’t let him glide even if fully feathered. Poor Grian hasn’t survived the freezing cold long enough to know if his feathers would grow back with enough time.

- anonymous

- EX somehow gets into the scattered mix. Spawning in the Deep Dark, the exiled admin is terrified, and will stop at nothing to find his brother. 🌙

- (Scattered AU) Scar and Bdubs, after months(?) of travel, make it to the Ender Dragon's island. Bdubs is scared for both of their lives; he is in no condition to fight, he can't even STAND, and he's so, so afraid to die and be condemned to falling forever in the void once again. Scar says nothing, only gently setting his friend down behind an obsidian pillar before his skin goes completely translucent, his eyes clouding white. (Paraphrased: Scar defeats the dragon, him and Bdubs meet up with TFC)

- @/petrichormeraki

- the plugins do not work, so singleplayer sleep is out. Beds do reset spawn point, so the Hermits who spawned in a place where they can get them would do well to make several and use them as checkpoints along their journey (and hope that they don't get broken, especially for those who had to escape death loops....)

- (my answer to some questions)

- Those trapped in death loops change, adapting until they aren't harmed anymore or till they escape. After all, what are players if not adaptable?

- @permafrost782

- Xisuma blames his broken helmet for being unable to admin, as some sort of comfort. But there is no comfort there. The truth is, not even Joe, Tango, Cub, or Hypno can access the chat, can even begin to run commands to fix what has gone wrong. If they could, they would have teleported everyone to 0,0 and reset the worldspawn. Those partnered with any of the admins feel a certain kind of hopelessness. Those without feel a different kind of hopeless.

- @/basaltdragon

- To add to the scattered AU: Though i had seen someone explain the void connecting to the end so Bdubs gets out of that fall, i had the thought of this; What if eventually the void loops around with the overworld's sky, so he's basically in a continuous loop if falling to his death and respawning in the void until he finally is lucky enough in his falls to get over water and live. After that he just has to stay alive otherwise he returns to the void..

-@aetosofvalla

- Somewhere, in the back of Scar’s vex-addled mind, there’s the worry of Jellie. Where is she? Is she with another hermit? Did she spawn in with another village again and will he have to find her again? -🟣

- (Scattered AU) Cub and Scar have been linked by the Vex ever since their deal. One day, Cub's iron armor burns against his skin all at once, and through the searing pain is a horrifying realization that Scar has given in. - M

-@/petrichormeraki

- After a while Cub gets the resources to build a nether portal, but then he finds his portal has connected with someone else's. He finds himself lost again, without access to the farms he's built or the resources he's gathered, but at least he knows a friend is close.

- anonymous

- The End duo come across another end city. There’s a boat at the far end. Scar flies up on delicate vex wings to get the spare elytra and other loot. They’ve been walking for far too long. He floats down (as if he had the slow-falling effect. There’s only health in the brewing stand. Bdubs’ worry for Scar increases) with an extra set of trousers, boots, an elytra, the potions and a pic. Scar offers the elytra to Bdubs. He refuses. It’ll take longer to walk, but he never wants to fall again🟣

- Mumbo gets caught up in redstone work and doesn't bother trying to find anyone else. So when another hermit finally finds him, he has to stop his evoker friend from attacking. Whether or not he's successful is another thing.

- Anonymous

- (Scattered AU) Consider. When Doc finds Grian on the mountain peak while exploring the terrain, a message sends through everyone's communicators. <Grian was blown up by a Creeper>. Doc doesn't get a death message that time, despite both of them suffering the consequences of a surprised Doc in a server where mob-oriented hermits are more volatile than they should be. Doc doesn't go looking for other hermits again after that, and Grian is shocked into numbness at the dawning realization that his monster friends might be so much worse off than he thought. - M

- @/petrichormeraki

A summary of where things stand so far

- scattered au pog!!! hypno is in a seemingly endless flowery field. it was nice at first, but there's no trees, no food, and hardly any water. the sun is so hot. flowers aren't filling. hypno thought he liked being alone.

- Anonymous

- Mumbo doesn’t succumb to the magic of the mansion like perhaps Cub and Scar have, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t entirely unaffected- his skin becomes a little more washed out, instincts a little more violent- he certainly can’t go into villages anymore, otherwise the iron golem will smash him to bits

- @/fluffy-papaya

- With Scar using Vex magic, the Vex turn their attention to Cub, trying to tempt him at every turn. More then once he's found his mask in one of his chests, staring up at him, or awoken in a cold sweat from a dream full of vex. So far, he's resisted the temptation. Wether that lasts is another question entirely.

-@/bat-connoisseur

- Maybe eventualy hypno realises Even flowers would need water to grow, or that the bees must have a bee hive somewhere around here, and the bee hive is always connected to a tree(I think thats the case in Minecraft). So he tries to find where the buzzing comes from and follow the bees around.

- @/ciaravixen

- cleo bases a lot of her identity around being a zombie, right? she probably isnt too happy to be cured. she probably cries all the time it takes her to heal. it had to be done, but that doesnt mean she has to like it. and she doesnt, not one little bit.

- Anonymous

- that ask about Mumbo not bothering to look for anyone got me thinking.... Mumbo getting too caught up in his work with the evokers to look for the others. Mumbo making friends with the illagers. Mumbo knowing that it's completely reasonable that nobody has found him yet, but still getting the creeping feeling that no one is coming for him. Mumbo spending all his time with his new friends because, after all, they're here, and the hermits aren't... All this to say that, when the hermits eventually do find him, he might not be very inclined to leave...

- @/crows-in-space

- At one point, Mumbo's new friends are just...watching him try to do his stuff, observing. Mumbo's getting increasingly frustrated when ne of the evokers watching him breaks off and hands him something. At first he thinks its a totem of undying, its shaped like one, but its strange. Made out of iron, and its eyes are diamonds instead of emeralds. Then it starts to burn his hands and he passes out from the pain. When he wakes, its gone and he moves on, a bit more wary of his 'friends'. Maybe it was a mean joke, or some kinda of strange inhiation for the mansion maybe Except next time he's frustrated, he thows his hands up annoyed and fangs rise out of the ground around him and snap at the air. He cries out, confused, before looking at his hands which almost look like they've been painted with gray paints. it wont come off. He seems mentally the same but now he starts to experiment with his new found abilities. Maybe they can help with his redstone or even find others.

- Anonymous

- after trying a poisonous flower, hypno respawns back in the field. this time, he tries walking in a different direction. maybe this is the way out.

- Anonymous

- The flowers in Hypno’s area are just so perfect... blooming dandelions don’t lose their seeds when he brushes against them, petals that are crushed underfoot quickly regain their shape- and if his mind wasn’t so affected, he would’ve noticed the flower he picked was quickly replaced by another

- @/fluffy-papaya

- The Moobloom has one unique feature: The ability to leave behind flowers in its path... that is, the ability to alter the world around it simply by walking. These flower plains are not particularly large, maybe eight or so chunks across in each direction, but glitched world generation spawned in a herd of mooblooms, and all they've been doing is walking around causing little distortions, one on top of the other. From the inside, where Hypno is standing, the plains go on forever. The air is thick with buttercup pollen that's slowly dulling his sense of space and time. He has to pull it together, somehow. Force the world to recognise that he's walking forwards in a straight line. Or he'll be wandering in circles forever...

- @/draconic-dreams

- another hermit- maybe beef? sees the edge of a deep, fragrant field. on the horizon, not far away, is hypno, walking in circles. he calls but he cannot hear beef. something tells the man not to go into that field- at least, not without a flint and steel. (Shade note: Beef and Joe saved Hypno and are currently sheltering him (unconscious) in their spawn sanctuary)

- anonymous

- Maybe if they went through the exit portal and it glitched but good. They don't think about the fact it should send them back to their spawns, Scar feels something at the back of his mind that very much isn't him tell him to change his mind, stay in this place becuase they'll just be trapped if they try to leave, but Bdubs grabs his arm and jumps in before Scar can say anything. For a second, blessed silence, Scar's mind feels clear and normal. then they show up at world spawn and scare theother

- anonymous

(Shade note: people at the spawn haven now include Joe, Beef, Hypno, TFC, Scar, and Bdubs)

- Once Keralis and Cleo are healed up, the village gang starts going to 0,0 to try to meet up with others. On the way, they find a flower forest (potentially the same one Hypno’s in). They find some mooblooms and fall in love (this was def not done bc I want some fluff, nope not at all /s) -🟣

- Mumbo receives a set of robes from his evoker friend. He’s loathe to get rid of his suit, but at the same time... well, all the better to fit in, right? This is a glitch and fluke anyway, and he might as well blend in if the illagers ever turn on him. That’s it. That’s the only reason he tosses the suit jacket into the fireplace, don’t be silly. It has nothing to do with the feeling that he just doesn’t want to leave...

- anonymous

- I’m imagining Shattered Impulse looking like the Fishman from Shape of Water + the teeth of an Angler fish and the ability to unhinge his jaw. Poor guy probably gets mistaken for a glitched mob when someone finds him.

- @/fandomrecycling

- Yes hello it's me again. After the pollen spells breaks for Hypno (and whoever else might have tried to save him beforehand...), he notices he's a little different. he can't always control how he moves, he doesn't like eye contact, and he takes an even bigger interest in his, well, interests than before. Basically Tourettic Hypno go brrr (I am tourettic so feel free to ask me clarification!)

- @/fireflower-dusk

- I don't think Keralis has been mentioned except for being in the nether so I would like to contribute that he spawned in that soul sand and skeleton biome that has almost nothing in it.

- anonymous

- Mumbo, being hundreds of thousands of blocks out from spawn, is the last hermit to be found. Even after the glitch was fixed, Mumbo was so caught up in his research and new abilities that he no longer felt it mattered. He'd been apart from the hermits for well over a year now; and a long time ago he gave up hope that they'd come back for him. This was, of course, until he woke up one morning to a disturbance outside. When he goes to check the source of the racket, he's left frozen in place at the sight of Iskall on his mansion's doorstep. And at the end of it all, despite Mumbo telling himself that he was better alone, Iskall's hand on his shoulder, reassuring that "Yes, I'm here, yes, I'm real, and no, I'm not leaving, you spoon." Is enough for Mumbo to break, clinging to Iskall as if he'd disappear at any moment, murmuring "I'm sorry" over and over like a broken record. -🧸

- Maybe after Wels and Hels make their deal, and Wels gets some gold gear and a respawn anchor to click, Hels shows him how to create a portal to Hels the place to which from there, they think they can get into the overworld. The only catch being that to get in to Hels the place you need to focus all of you emotions onto pure hatred and anger, but the question is could Wels do it?

- Anonymous

- Hels taunts Wels about how no one came to get him, and plants ideas about how this was done on purpose, about how he's the only one to spawn in the nether for a reason. He tells him the hermits want him gone. And Wels of course becomes angry but he becomes angry at Hels for trying to tell him his friends didn't care about him. He's also angry at himself though, maybe for thinking he hasn't done enough to make his friends want to keep him around. He is never mad at the hermits though, never them

- TFC's concerned. Even if he thinks it's great he found Bdubs and Scar, the latter shouldn't be able to just kill the ender dragon alone. TFC doesn't know much about Scar but the man can barely fly usually, why did he turn into a vex, anyway? vexes don't exist in the end. TFC need to ask, at least to make sure he's ok, but everytime he tries he stops in his track once the cold, icy blue eyes stare back at him. devoid of the usual warmth his green ones have.

- Anonymous

- (Scatter AU) Saw someone mention the other ops on the server and had a thought: Tango is a programmer with a specialty in game programming. He’s probably sitting at the campfire thinking of every single way the game must have been corrupted to cause this many problems. If he could just get into the code, maybe he could fix some of these problems. I’ll bet he’s driving himself a little crazy thinking of everything that could be done to fix the world and not being able to do anything...

- Anonymous

- Cub was lucky, he thinks. Seeing the many death messages in chat, he's torn between gratitude that he's ended up with what almost looks like a normal spawn, and worry for his friends. After gathering enough resources to stay reasonably safe, he knows what he has to do next. So when he encounters Xb, he eventually suggests he takes some resources and a bed he's salvaged from the abandoned village and heads towards 0,0, hoping there'll be someone there. (1/3)But as for him... well, there's an obvious place to head as far as he can see, for someone with a safe enough spawn point and the ability to gather resources. A place where he knows for sure he'll find someone else, someone who needs help. After all, unless this world is even more messed up that it seems, there's only one place where a player would be killed by the Ender dragon, and he knows exactly how to get there. (2/3) (Shade note: Him and xB were not successful in finding the Hermit who the mystery portal belonged to. They must have died in the Nether and returned to their spawn point. XB resists the idea that they split up, but he sees the logic in it and agrees to start the long journey for 0,0.) (pt. 3 was eaten by the inbox)

- Anonymous

- Maybe one of the reasons Cleo doesn't like being a human as much is because she had chronic pain (particularly in her back) when she was alive, and when she gets cured after meeting up with False, Stress, and Keralis, her back pain comes back (along with all the other pains of being alive)

-@/justme123abz

- Whenever Etho spawns, wherever Etho spawns, he takes it upon himself to tell each and every Hermit he can find to head towards 0,0. He's not sure why, but he believes that if they get everyone together, they can figure out how to fix the broken world.If there aren't any Hermits in sight, he'll make a sign out of whatever's avalible before going searching. It's a complete pain to try and build anything coherent out of sand and cactus, but he has to try. He has to get everyone together. It's their best hope. It's their only hope.Even Evil X. Even Hels. Everyone. He doesn't care about past grievances. They need to get through this. And their only option is to do it together. (Shade note: He doesn't stay with Team ZIT for long. He probably dies trying to protect them from something, knowing that it will only result in him finding another Hermit anyway. Even though he himself isn't making any progress toward the origin, he counts it as a victory every time he can guide one of his friends just a little bit closer.)

- Doc Ren and Grian himself thought that him being found and safe would fix everything right? yea no he has horrible fevor, he struggles to retain warmth depsite 2 feet from a fire, he's tired and has a hard time stay awake becuase on the mt he slept alot, he barley eats cuz he cant hold too much down rn. He cant stand being alone or he'll start to panic, ands he's just trying to ignore the new fox fetures he has desperately when he's aware enough to do. Doc and Ren have a hard time ahead of them.

- Anonymous

- Mumbo was trying to make a machine with redstone and evoker magic to contact the hermits right?so what if he did build the machine ad at first his only way to get the magic was to go annoy the evoker hoping he would try to hit him and instead hit the machine to power it. Plan backfired so many times because of the vex killing him before. So when Mumbo becomes apprentice he wants to try power the machine himself but it breaks because he can't control how much magic he uses yet.time to study magic

-@/artsarasp

- Etho dies with the Zit and ends up back in it. Next he ends up in X's spawn, there's no one around but he finds the bloody tunnel X punched himself, and races down it to see in the distance Xisuma and Jevin in a cave.He calls out to them, only to get overwhelmed by zombies that just spawned, He manages to gurgle out 0,0 before he dies again. (He's now determined to be the messenger of meetings, even willing to die on purpose to find them all). After that? Ren's old spawn, now he has to track ren

- anonymous

- I guess hypno’s been... hypnotizd 👉😎👉

- We need more Jevin and xisuma interaction content, be it fluff or angst, how aware is jevin by the time Xisuma gets there? How many axolotls do they take with them on the way to the surface?

- @/ciaravixen

(Shade comment: We need more Jevin and xisuma interaction content, be it fluff or angst, how aware is jevin by the time Xisuma gets there? How many axolotls do they take with them on the way to the surface? )

- Mumbo having to learn how to use the magic, the evoker will probably also try to teach him how to summon the vex, even if Mumbo really wants to just focus on the magic and not the evocation.What if he's able to summon Scar since he gave his name to the vex? just by accident and Mumbo gets so startled by Scar's new appearance that he immediately interrupts the evocation and makes Scar dissappear. Scar reappears where he was before confused cause for a moment he saw Mumbo?did he allucinante??

- @/artsarasp

- Scattered AU! So what if what happened with EX and Hels happened with old hermits to? Like Biffa, Generikb, Jessassin etc etc. Everyone is concerned as it is but then they see a death message from one of them and realize it's even worse then they thought.

- Anonymous

- Once Wels and Helssknight are in Hels the have to sneak around a lot. Hels isn’t as popular there as he had previously boasted, that’s why he had tried to take over the over world. Cue heart to heart talk before a Hels version of another hermit cuts them off. (Can you pick the Hermit I’m kinda stuck here)

- Anonymous

- Iskall must have not even known the direction he was walking from his desert spawn, so its purely by luck he ended up finding the mansion mumbo resides in- his cybernetic eye is fixed almost instantly upon his arrival by mumbo and iskall feels his hope fades as he realises they’re /so/ far from the hermits. I also guess he must be worried about whats happening to his friend right before him, mumbo wouldnt willingly give into the vex and evoker magic right? 1/2 But he isn’t so sure anymore, the days at the mansion are quiet and uncomfortable as Iskall has to be wary of the illagers that walk the halls, mumbo assures him of his safety, but theres no light in his eyes - he doubts the illagers welcomed mumbo at first- The usual banter isn’t there at all, its dead silence as mumbo keeps on working and Iskall can see how paler his skin becomes and the blue scars that litter his body 2/2

- Anonymous

- Etho died and respawned at the true spawn once. Beef was elated to see him and was afraid if he let him go, he would disappear. He didn’t want to lose his friend again. In the end, he does, he was actually with Etho when he dies, and he never lets the feeling go.

- @/harley-the-pancake

- aww poor etho! At least he's okay with this new role as messenger. Now i can just imagen he ends up at Ren's spawn and manages to track the man, nearly dying but staying alive and- thats a house in the distance! He goes over and nearly runs into Doc, who invites him in surprised and they catch each other up, their spawns and Etho's situation. They're overjoyed to hear about the others and Ethos glad to see them realtivly okay. Grian's condition is worrying however, changed and still weak (1) They agree they need to start heading to 0,0 but Ren is nervous about leaving safety, Doc wants them safe, and with Grian still sick and weak from laying in snow for weeks it'll take a bit until he's stable enough to travel (he'll probs have to be carried anyways). Etho stays for a few days at their insistence for rest, he wants to keep going there is more hermits out there he hasn't found, they are insistent that he take time to recover. Then, he lets himself die. Off to the next hermit! (2)

- Anonymous

- This is for the very very beginning, but maybe before False meets up with Cleo, she spawns in a warm ocean biome. Coral structures fill the water around her, and tropical fish dart between them. It would be almost peaceful, were it not for the fact that False was encased in a cage of coral.It’s a gamble every time. She has to try and smash her way out of her colorful prison before the tide rolls in, slow and steady water rising up her body and over her head. The water makes her movements clumsy and arduous as she tries to free herself, racing against time to escape the awful tide. (Pt 2) OH SORRY I HAD AN IDEA (this is from the coral False anon)What if Stress and False both spawn in that biome and they have to try and help each other out before the tide comes in?? Added angst if one of the times one manages to escape but the other doesn’t

- Anonymous

- (scattered au) Every time that a hermit dies the universe and the world file starts to corrupt, the way that things are going if everything doesn't go back to normal soon, then the world will crumble on itself with the hermits inside.

- Anonymous

- Admins log, day: ⬛⬛⬛ I've finally managed to find my way to the drip stone caves, weirdly I think I may have a good connection down here, I'll try to contact the others, if they haven't forgotten about me yet. (Shade note: Far away in the woodland mansion, Mumbo rubs his eyes and marks down another failure on his latest contraption. How long will it be until he can generate a signal? He has no way of knowing that, for a single moment, it worked. He stopped checking his communicator a long time ago, so he doesn't see the single message until much later: <Xisuma> can anyone hear me?)

- At some point Etho cycles round to Doc's spawn. His friend is long gone but there are five creepers in formation watching him. Waiting for something.It takes a moment for him to recall the trick of unfocusing his ears just right, so that their hisses resolve into words. He hasn't had to do it for years, after all. He hasn't run into General Spaz since he left Chocolate Island.“It'ssss been a while, Esssssho” the General says. “Let'sssss make a wager”The General reaches out for a handshake... it seems the glitch finally gave him a pair of arms.(ancient Etho lore go brrrr)

- Anonymous

- Both the snow and the void are cold, and getting stuck in there means getting frostbite a lot is fairly likely, so Grian and Bdubs would be unlikely to get out with all their fingers...

- @/bat-connoisseur

- Based on a little piece of this ask where it was mentioned that Hypno passed out only three steps outside the flower biome, I start to wonder, how long was he wandering in circles without food? Why did he collapse so immediately? Was the biome itself perhaps sustaining him? Keeping him "healthy" (if you could call it that) and alive? COULD he have starved to death if he hadn't been pulled out? Or would he have just kept walking? And walking. And walking...

-@/asexualbert

- An idea focusing on evil xisuma. He ended up spawning on the nether roof, stuck with nothing but mushrooms and bedrock as far as the eye can see. No communication, no water, no way out. He can probably eat the mushrooms, at the very least.... but there may be some bad side effects from it. It's disheartening and lonely up there, dying from starvation over. And over. And over. At one point, etho may have spawned there as well... but of course, he wouldnt last long. Condemned to endless roof...

-@/therainofsweetmelody

- Okay, hear me out: after Hypno’s been out of his illusion for a while, he starts to get headaches. He doesn’t think anything of it, until he wakes up one day with small horns growing and flowers in his hair. In conclusion: Moobloom!Hypno

- @/harley-the-pancake

Art:

- An Impulse

- A Grian

- A Guardian Impulse

- A Void Bdubs by @/sweetest-honeybee

- This Hypno by @/irys-97

- an Iskall and a Grian

- a fox Grian

- A Guardian Impulse

- a suffering Xisuma

- Mumbo and Evoker doodles

Writing:

Up. He needs to go up. He spawned too deep in the world, and though he'd heard of underground spawns there was no way, no way in the world that being so deep under was normal. Every cave he crawled up either came to a dead end or opened into a massive, mob-filled cavern, and somehow he still hadn't found even half a mineshaft. He could spend hours upon hours painfully clawing his way through the stone, but he keeps convincing himself it'll be faster to find a cave that leads to the surface. The pounding heartbeat of a warden stills rings in his ears, an ever-present reminder of his terrible luck. If only he could get some wood. Just a few planks, some torches. Anything. It's almost as if the stone doesn't want him to leave.

- @basaltdragon

- Buried by @arts-and-drafts

- Cleo grits her teeth and pulls a leather cap low over her head and stays on the outskirts of the taiga village, where the less scrupulous people go. She can't stay here long, if an iron golem catches her she's going to end up social spawning a bunch of less sapient friends and wiping out the village. The air is cold and thin out here, close to the mountains. The strays leave her alone. She's not sure how to feel about that. ~@betweenlands

- "A poem, by Impulse" by @/rayveewrites

- Pulse by @/arts-and-drafts

- Unnamed Impulse fic by @bat-connoisseur

- Another Impulse fic by @/betweenlands

- Don't think about it by me (@shadeswift99 )

- A poetic fic by @irys-97

- this short anon piece

- If I lose myself by @/arts-and-drafts

- Mountainside by @/basaltdragon

- Sleepwalk by @/betweenlands

- This Grian fic by @silverechosandsmileymasks

- A Jevin fic by @/basaltdragon

- This Hypno piece by @/fireflower-dusk

- This Iskall anon

- Alternate Impulse fic by @/rayveewrites

- Short Grian fic by @rk9-mew2

- an alternate headcanon for Mumbo

- This Xisuma fic by @/bat-connoisseur

[theinfinitedivides]

I thought I was seeing things when I first saw the oneus news today. They aren't my ults nor was ravn my bias (keonhee hello) but my friend loves him and I've had to console her all day.

Regardless of if it's true or not, or half true half a lie, it's B A D and I can't really see anything other than him leaving.

At first it read so much like Lucas' situation last year in NCT for me so I was a bit unsure, but there seems to be far more evidence. Also, I'm not one to discredit someone making such serious accusations. It should be taken seriously.

I don't really know how to feel. I was meant to see them live and I do like their music a lot and enjoyed his voice, and now it just feels... empty?

Not to mention it makes me scared. It may sound selfish (because it partially very much is), but it makes me wonder what other group is next. If there's anything else that someone I look up to has done that goes along these lines. It makes me feel sick. It makes me want to tune off anyone I may enjoy watching or listening to.

It just makes me wonder what else is secretly tainted and I HATE that. I really hope this situation is resolved and taken seriously by the company and that he leaves. And to anyone who loved ravn or oneus, I hope you're doing as well as you can right now 💕

i completely understand, tbh—i starting following oneus during their pre-debut days and then really got into them after their official debut in mid January of 2019, which was a really rough period for me since i had just lost my aunt a few weeks prior at the beginning of the month. i think my relationship with them was more of a comfort group than an ult, in a sense? even if after this news i do decide to continue listening to them (which, depending on what RBW decides to do, is still an option) that's the category they'd stay in, although i'm not sure how much comfort they'll offer.

i was also hesitant to talk about it here bc it did feel like the Lucas situation (which still has some contradictory points in my opinion/much less evidence for the case), but as soon as i saw the OP talk about how he gaslighted her and mentioned wanting to kill his ex-girlfriend i knew i had to speak up. on the writeblr side of Tumblr i've been gaslighted and threatened by several users over the years (all of whom i have blocked and reported), so ik how terrifying that can be in my own life. no one should have to go through that, especially at the hands of someone who claims to love them/wants to marry them in the future.

my Spotify library has been..... in limbo, during the last few hours, and i haven't touched a single song from them. it sucks, and it's not fair to the rest of the members, but this isn't like with Woojin or Wonho where we had circumstantial evidence (which was shaky at best and eventually proved to be downright false in both cases), or with Hanbin, where the evidence we did have was greatly blown out of proportion and the actual crime was much milder than we thought. this is a detailed list of allegations with electronic trails, and he has had his hands in most of the group's work. Blood Moon, which earned them several awards, opens the album with a prequel track—an absolutely gorgeous piece and some of their best work to date—where he raps through a lot of the lines with Leedo. i don't know if i'll be able to separate the art from this part of the artist, and frankly i don't want to think about that rn when everything is so fresh.

pls know, however, that you are completely valid in being worried about other groups—not a day goes by where there's a new scandal in the industry and i don't immediately think of some of my own biases, and i wonder if getting into k-pop was worth it. but you do not deserve to have your happiness taken away from you bc of things that have not happened yet (and may never happen) to people that you enjoy listening to.

at the time i'm answering this RBW has put out a statement saying that they're investigating the charges and taking them seriously, but they won't be commenting on anything else until the internal investigation is finished. even if he is proven innocent (which is looking to be more and more unlikely) he's pretty much ruined his career, damaged those of his fellow members, and ended years long friendships with other 4th generation idols. (CyA from onewe [oneus' sister band] privating all of the tracks they produced together and unfollowing him on SoundCloud is a pretty clear sign in my book that this is as bad, if not worse, as we think it is—they've been friends for years, and him taking this step [after most likely trying to confirm the details himself] means both bands are on very shaky ground.) i don't want oneus to disband—not when everything is finally starting to look up for them—but i want people to be held accountable for what they've done. if him leaving is equivalent to that, then let him leave. let him leave, and let the others live in peace. let them come to terms with this, and figure out what they want to do next. let them be able, in the future, to stand on their own two feet, so that fans can hear about oneus and think of their music and their accomplishments. not this.

[naramdil]

Hafsa i have followed you for years and have always appreciated your beautiful advice and thought processes which led me to reach out to you since idk who else i can talk to. I basically had a good cry today because i’m 27 and still very lost career wise. Idk what i’m meant to do or be and i feel so behind in life while my friends have careers they enjoy. I just feel like i’m stuck doing things i hate for money. I dont even know if i’m meant to be anything career wise and it scares me so much. I’m currently trying to do this web development course because i know i can land an excellent job after i complete it but i dont look forward to studying it. I know i’m doing it to get a good job so i can do the things i want to do like travel, cook and my other passions. I dont think i have a passion in any career. But i also dont want to hate what i do 8 hrs a day. Idk if i will hate web development but it’s not the most exciting thing to learn. At this point, i dont have time to explore my passions and discover myself. That time has gone. I just dont know what to do now. I know this is a lot and by all means if this is something you wish not to address then i totally understand. I wish you the best 🤍

hey, I am sending you a big hug and I hope your big cry was a good release for you 💗

I'm really proud of you for finding a way to fund your passions, it's a long game for sure but I think it's a very smart choice bc being in a financially good place - putting yourself there - can end up being very rewarding, even if right now it seems like you're gonna hate it. bc in the long run, you'll have the stability to be able to then focus on your passions outside of your work, and compartmentalizing your life like that is honestly a blessing and healthy. i honestly think the idea of doing a job that you're passionate about is false marketing bc majority of people cannot and will not have that. and that's okay!! it's unfortunately the system we live in. so I feel like you shouldn't feel bad if your career isn't what you're passionate about - with a very important caveat and that is: it shouldn't be soul sucking either. so if you hate web development, and it is becoming a soul sucking thing maybe you need to find something else? (again, maybe once you actually start working in this field you may end up liking it, so no harm in giving it a shot if you haven't had a job job yet)

another thing is ik there is this mentality that if you've spent so much time on something you hate you might as well see it through and push aside what you actually want, but I don’t agree. you should not continue doing it if the only reason you’re doing it bc of the time you’ve already expended on it. that’s like staying in a relationship that you’re no longer invested it. sometimes it’s time to break up and that’s okay! like i've heard of people quitting medical school bc they realized they did all this work and it wasn't worth it for them. and even me - i started pre med, got a business degree and now am in fashion school.. so like i literally knew ten years ago this is what i wanted and it took me that long to get here but like .. here i am... truckin along lol.

so idk, I guess it's time to think about what you want and seeing how you can get there. and forgetting about society and the idea of time and what you "should have" accomplished by now etc. bc those are the things that contribute to the feeling of stuckness, and you don't deserve that at all. you're not stuck, you have agency over your life and you don't have to do anything perfectly, just what is best for you. so just give yourself grace, treat yourself like you would treat your best friend or a young cousin, you know? like you'd tell them they're wonderful and that their life will be okay bc they'll make it okay, and you need to tell yourself that too. it will be okay, it's literally never ever too late, (let me be an example of that, also there are people at my school in their 40s so honestly it is really and truly never too late to do anything!) and just give yourself some love and time and you will figure it out little by little. you've got this babe 🥰

[imagines-by-a-typical-fangirl]

White Lies (Pt. 09 of 21)

Pairing: Keanu Reeves X Reader

Word count: 2.1 K

Summary: Keanu found the girl almost dead, in the wrecks of what was once her car. While she was in surgery, stuck in a coma, he gathered the best doctors of New York to attend to her. They told him she is likely to have some kind of brain damage, what may lead to memory loss. And this possibility added up wit the fact that she's pregnant, made the council come up with an odd idea. They asked Keanu to pretend to be her husband, since the stress of finding out everything that happened could put the baby in danger. He reluctantly agreed, but only if she does has some kind of memory loss. He still goes she'll wake up soon, with her memories intact.

But when you finally wake up, there's nothing inside. You're quick to find your head is empty, void, like a blank canvas. The only thing that brings you some relief, that makes you feel less lonely is the mention of a husband. And you can't wait to meet him, because you know you can't deal with this by yourself.

<- Previous part (08)

Next part (10)->

{Keanu Reeves Masterlist}

{John Wick Masterlist}

×

For Better Or Worse

You sigh when you find yourself back in a hospital bed, eyes adjusting to the light. Blinking a little, a sharp pain on both your knees make you groan, pushing yourself up.

“Slow down, slow down.” Keanu is suddenly by your side, gently pushing you back down. “You need to rest.”

“I'm alright.” You mutter, a hand coming to lay on your stomach.

“I know, beautiful. But try not to get too agitated.” Keanu caresses your cheek, leaning down to peck your lips. “I'm so sorry about the journalists. I make some calls and I'll have them all fired.”

“No, Ke, don't do that.” Taking his hand on yours. “They were just doing their job, and it's not their fault I'm... Like this.”

“They know about your condition, is all over the news. That was unacceptable.” Keanu is angry. You've never seen this angry before. Pushing yourself into a sitting position, you place his hand over your belly.

“I'm fine. We're both fine.” With your forehead touching his, you assure him, keeping your voice soft and sweet.

“I know, I just...” His voice fades, his hand gently rubbing your belly. “When Laura called me I almost lost my mind.”

“Yeah, but I'm here now.” Kissing him again, you hold Keanu close. “Do you think you can take me home? I'm sick and tired of this hospital.” You plead, hoping the doctors won't make you stay.

“Don't worry, they'll discharge you later today. They just need to check if everything is okay with you and the baby.”

“Alright.” Feeling relieved, you lie back down as Keanu settles down on armchair placed next to your bed. “Ke... About earlier today...” Biting your lip, you can't control as your float back to that moment, and you're suddenly a little hot.

“It was yesterday. You spent the night here.”

“Oh...” That sucks. One more night away from home. “Well... About yesterday, I really–”

“I'm sorry, (Y/N).” Keanu cuts you short, elbows on his knees as he looks down before raising his eyes at you. “I shouldn't have kissed you like that. I should've controlled myself and–”

“I really liked it.” Interrupting whatever nonsense Keanu is saying, you speak up. Despite the burn in your cheeks, you need him to know it. “And I... I didn't want you to control yourself.”

“(Y/N), I–” He stops talking when someone comes in, and you look at the door, watching as Dr. Wright comes in.

“Good morning Mr. and Mrs. Reeves.” He says with a smile. “How are you two today?”

“I'm fine.” You answer, feeling as the bed moves up until you're in a half-sitting position. You're tired of this hospital since you're always coming and going for many appointments. “Can I go, home doctor? I fainted because of the questions and flashes, but I feel alright.”

“Don't worry about that. You're recovering well, physically at least, and since your exams came out good, I'll let you go home after we have a little chat, is that alright?” He stands by the edge of the bed, an expression on his face you can't read.

“Sure.”

Dr. Wright takes a deep breath, exchanging a glance with Keanu. You take a look at your husband too, and you wonder if he knows what this is about.

“Mrs. Reeves, we already told you that as times passes, lesser are the chances you'll recover your memories.” He begins, and you immediately sink, looking down at your hands. Of course, you remember it, you just didn't want to think about it. So you pushed everything back, focusing on what's happening now. The pregnancy, trying to fix things with a husband you don't know...

“Yes, doctor. It was one of the first things you told me.” Nodding, you mutter.

“From where we stand now, the brain is healing... So it means that, if absolutely nothing came back until now–”

“It probably won't.” You finish it off for him, trying not to let them notice how your hands are shaking, clenching them into fists.

“Well, there are extremely rare cases, but I can't give you false hopes. And since things have been going well for you, there's no reason to.”

“It's alright.” Clearing your throat, you take a deep breath. “Can I go home now?” Your voice comes out louder than expected, as anger starts kicking in. At what, you have no idea. Probably at yourself.

“Here are the papers.” He hands them over to Keanu, alongside a pen, and you watch as he signs them.

You're silent on the drive home, eyes on the city passing by, heavy gray clouds making everything a little monochromatic. When you get home, you take a long shower, hoping it would help. It didn't. As you come out of the bathroom, you make your way to the window, staring at the rain falling. That makes you finally break, bitter tears rolling down. This isn't fair. With a hand on your heart, you start moving. You need to be outside, you need to do something to get rid of the sadness, growing roots inside your heart.

Rushing through the house, on the tip of your toes not to let Keanu listen, you reach a door on the first floor that leads to the garden on the side of the house. Taking a deep breath, you slide it open, shivering when the cold wind hits your skin. But still, you step forward until the rain is soaking your clothes and hair. But it doesn't make you feel better. It only makes it worse, and you're crying, sobbing.

Your tears are mixed with the cold rain, and it doesn't take much until your soaking wet. But it doesn't matter. You need this. Dr. Wright is right, you won't remember. Nothing has come back. Not in dreams, not in flashes, nothing. When you sleep, your dreams consist of things you learned after. Before the accident, everything is blank. Forever lost. An entire life, childhood, teenage years, gone.

Keanu doesn't want to think much. There used to be a deadline for this lie. Until she remembers. Until she gets her old life back. And he bought the idea. He'd be her husband until that moment, and then, (Y/N) will probably hate him forever. But now... If that day never comes, what will be of them? Of him, whose heart is already on her possession?

Keanu doesn't want to think about that either. About the fact that he's falling for her, drowning in the fake life he built for her sake. As he sits on the kitchen table, looking for something different to cook for (Y/N), his mind takes him back to the day before, when he kissed her in a way he shouldn't have. He knew he had to stop, but he didn't have it in him. She's too beautiful, and she wanted him. At least that's what he thought. The feeling of her hands on him was too much, and if it wasn't for Laura's call, he doesn't know if he'd have stopped at all. His mind was a blur, completely overwhelmed by her.

Putting his phone down, Keanu rests his head on his hands, struggling to push those images away. Her kisses, her touch, her soft breathing. Her. This is driving him crazy, and part of him wants this to go on forever. Keanu wants (Y/N) to be his wife. He wants it to be real. He needs it to be real. He just doesn't know what to do.

A sudden thud makes him look up, and the low yelp that follows has him up to his feet, walking over the source of the sound. His heart almost stops when he sees (Y/N) on the living room floor, soaking wet, sobbing, hugging her knees.

Your thigh burns from the fall as you pull both your knees to your chest. Now, you don't know if you're shaking from the sobs of from the cold. It doesn't really matter. A sudden touch on your back snaps you out of your state and, looking up, you see a very worried Keanu staring at you.

“(Y/N), what happened?” He asks, but you don't have it in you to answer. So you just throw your arms around his neck, an apologize stuck in your throat for getting him all wet. “It's alright, beautiful. It's alright.” He whispers in your ear, softly rubbing the small of your back. “Tell me what's wrong, beautiful.”

“I-I want to remember, Ke...” You mutter, voice all messed up by all the crying. “I haven't had anything. Dreams, flashes, nothing... And I want to. I want to remember my childhood, school, and I want to remember you. Our life together, all of it. And I was trying not to give it must thought because I'm really happy right now, with you but–”

“Breathe, sweetheart. Breathe.” As he speaks, Keanu picks you up, immediately carrying you upstairs. You're holding on to him, hiding your face on his neck, and trying to control the sobbing. He places you down somewhere, and you only notice it's his bathroom when he pulls away. You're seated on the sink, watching as Keanu takes a towel, wrapping it around your shoulders before taking another and starting to dry your hair.

“I'm sorry.” You mumble, finally calming down a little.

“It's alright. You needed this.” He stops before you, a towel in his hands, keeping a certain distance. You're about to question that when you notice he's trying not to position himself in between your legs. Keanu is such a gentleman. “You haven't broken down about it yet, and Dr. Harris warned me about this.”

“I just...” You don't know what to say, so you just take a deep breath, grabbing Keanu's shirt and pulling him to you. You don't mind him being this close. You need him, now more than ever. “If I didn't have you Ke, I... I don't know what I'd do.” Wrapping your arms around his neck, you feel as the towel falls from your shoulders.

“You won't ever have to know.” He assures you, a hand caressing your chin. “For better or worse, in sickness and health. Forever, sweetheart.”

“I'm falling in love with you.” The words come out fast, as you look into his beautiful dark eyes. “All over again.”

His lips break into a smile as he moves even closer, his sides brushing on the inside of your thighs. “I love you, (Y/N).” He whispers before bending down to kiss you.

• • •

The whole sky is coming down tonight as you watch the flashes of lightning that light up your room every once in a while. You've been trying to sleep for quite some time now, but all you manage to do is toss around, uncomfortable. You know exactly what you want to do, but you can't seem to gather enough courage.

Pushing yourself up, you run a hand through your hair. If you don't do this now, you'll just sleep here again. And you're tired of the guest room. Keanu is right there, two doors across the hall, and it's stupid to be here all alone when you can just go there and be with him.

So you swallow your cowardice and move, leaving the guest room and only stopping when you're before his door. He's probably sleeping by now and trying not to wake him up, you carefully turn the handle and push the door open. Keanu keeps it unlocked in case you need him. But the moment your close it behind your back, he moves, getting into a sitting position and eyes easily finding you despite the darkness.

“Sorry... I didn't mean to wake you up.” You have to raise your voice a little to make yourself heard through the small distance and above the sound of the rain. “I just... I think I'm ready to sleep here with you now.” Slowly, you walk to the bed, stopping by the edge. “If that's alright.”

“Of course it is.” He says, and you climb on the bed, still timid, lying down next to him.

You can see his face when lightning crosses the sky, and it makes you smile. Even though you're right next to him, it's not enough. You want more, so you hold your breath as you move, slowly at first, snuggling closer to him. “I-is it alright?” You mumble, stopping suddenly, holding your upper body with your elbow.

“Come here,” Keanu says softly, pulling you down until you have your head on his chest.

That's when you finally feel comfortable, eyes closed as you feel his breathing, as you listen to his heartbeat. “Can I sleep here from now on?”

“You don't have to ask, beautiful. This is our bedroom. And it's great to finally have you here with me.” He places a kiss on the top of your hair and you softly caresses his chest.

“This is good.” A thunder swallows your voice, so you repeat. “This is very good.”

“It is, beautiful.” His huge hand comes to your belly, gently rubbing it. “It is.”

×

@multific @inumorph @aestheticallywinchester @bvbwestfall @liviiii98 @allie1804-fan @gian-giannina @playboygeniusphilanthropist @partypoison00 @mariafetamina @fortheloveoffanfic @trin303

[cherry-gemz]

Healing Hands: Chapter One

Summary: You find yourself abroad in London as the Chief of Pediatrics. Everything has been running smoothly until you are faced with an undiagnosed case and the doctor assigned is anything but willing to face defeat. Will you be able treat the child's unknown disease in time, along while facing uncharted waters with love in the workplace?

Parings: Henry Cavill {Dr. Cavill} x Y/N {F!Reader}

Rating: Overall series 18+ only, Chapter is PG

Word count: 2200 +/-

Tags:  @evansamericanass @meowpurrbooks​ @lilithpaijiee @pterodactylterrace 

A/N: Trying something new at writing Henry fanfic. IDK if it’s any good, but either way wanted to start writing. LMK if you're interested, comments and tags welcomed! 💜

P.S. I am no means in any medical field or sorts, so if I get something incorrect on a term or process, bear with me xo.

----------------------------------------------------

You knew that it was a gamble moving to the UK for the Chief of Pediatrics position. But it was time for a change. You needed to leave Eugene, Oregon. Start fresh. There was too much pain there and you had to get away. So when your cousin, who was a nurse from Brighton informed you that there was a need at her hospital for the highly-visible role, you thought why the hell not? You'd score a free round-trip to England of anything and actually see some family you've never met if it didn't pan out. 

Little did you know that you'd fall in love with London: the weather, the people, the imagery of it all. Oregon weather wasn't all too different, so you acclimated well. It had been a few months of you settling in: understanding more of the language barriers despite it still being English. Knackered, cuppa, trollied. 

That is until you had a run in with the division chief of Pediatrics, Dr. Cavill. The staff adored the renowned and painstakingly handsome doctor. And while you could appreciate the view as well, you never were on the same page with his ideals. His defiant behavior of undermining your direction of the unit was becoming a thorn in your side. 

But this time, this time you'd had enough. He mentioned to a patient's parents, while with the speciality case, the hospital could take on their son's situation as priority and receive around the clock care. You threw down the patient's file on your desk and pinched the bridge of your nose. It was a lost cause, you had looked into the patient ever since you started the role.

The child seemed perfectly healthy and lab tests may show no signs of illness. But the chronic pain and fatigue were unexplainable. You empathized, but the poor child has undergone so many tests that at this point it was about providing facts to the parents. And right now, there was no cause of alarm. You weren’t a Dr. House, this wasn’t television. You didn't have the staff to dive into any research or clinical studies. You had a hospital to run, employees to pay, other lives needed saving. 

You picked up the phone to the case nurse on the pediatric floor. 

"Hello? Yes, this is Dr. Y/LN. Can you please remind Dr. Cavill of our 5pm? He's late. Thank you." 

Slowly hanging up on the phone, you turn back to the patient's file. The boy, Jon Foulger, was just shy of his ninth birthday. No positive results for Lupus or Guillain-Barré syndrome. But This case had been bothering you, poor Jon had been in the hospital for three months and still no progress on a diagnosis. While you were never known to give up on a patient, you knew giving false hope to the parents was detrimental not only to the family, but to the same of the hospital's integrity. You were in a high esteemed role now, you knew that you had to discuss further with Henry on his actions. 

Twenty more minutes passed by and you checked your watch. Fuming, you stood up from your desk and headed down to the pediatric floor by the lift. 

As you briskly walk down the hall corridors you can't wait to give Cavill a piece of your mind. You turn the corner and ram right into a brick wall, or so you thought.  Your hands instinctively pick up and see placed on the doctor's firm chest. You immediately flush and lose composure. 

You knew he was a good-looking man, but this up close and personal was a whole other level. His dark hair and curls were fluffy and good enough to touch. His piercing steel blue eyes looked at yours and made immediate contact. His bone structure made the Michaelangelo's David blush. 

"My apologies, Dr. Y/LN. Didn't see you there," his voice was like butter. 

You straightened out your white coat, "Ahem, yes. Well I seemed to have been lost in thought. My apologies as well."

"You wanted to see me?"

"Yes, almost an hour ago…" you shifted your weight to stand a bit taller. He towered over you with his muscular frame and height. 

"Patient...Jon Foulger. We must discuss the repercussions of your current actions."

"Jon-Jon," he replied stoic. 

"Excuse me?"

"He likes to be called Jon-Jon."

"Well yes, let's go to my office and discuss further, please Dr. Cavill."

"As you wish," he replied and pivoted his heel to the nearby lift.

The rise up to the 12th floor was a quiet one, awkward overall as you knew you had to give a coaching and hated the notion. You missed practicing medicine; while you enjoyed the administration of your position, the thrill of helping others and using your hands were erased with cases of employee performance reviews, reports, budgets. 

He coughed into his fist and then held his strong hands in place in a clasp. 

He finally broke the silence, "Enjoying London?"

"Yes, thank you."

"Have you had any time to take a holiday?"

"Um, no. Been too busy."

"It might do you some good," he replies as he looks to check his watch. 

You huff, "Somewhere you need to be, Doctor?"

"No, just checking the time."

His arrogance irritated you and now you weren't feeling as badly to give him his coaching. 

The lift opened as you arrived at the floor and he held out the door for you to exit first. You nod and walk to your office, your kitten heels clicked on the hospital's linoleum floor and the sound echoed through your ears. 

As you both enter your office you stride quickly to your desk to assume dominance of the room. 

Henry stood near the doorway, admiring your photos and certificates on the wall. 

"I knew you were American, but Stanford Medical? Interesting, thought you were from Oregon. When will you be returning?" You can't read him if that was a compliment or sarcasm. 

"Dr. Cavill, would you be so kind to shut the door," you state firmly and sit down, ignoring his comment about your return to the states.

His brow peaks and he nods, turning to close the door. 

"Please, have a seat," you say. 

"I'd rather stand, thank you," he replies and you know this is going to be a difficult conversation. 

"Well this will only take a moment then. Your recent behavior with the Foulger family, while I commend you for your dedication, has been slight askew with the hospital's protocols."

"Is that so?" His voice dropped and his brow arched. "In what way, Dr. Y/LN?"

You cough as the drawl of his mouth turns upward and you can swear there's a smug smirk across his face. 

"Well...for one...you've promised around the care of the child. Now simply put, we've exhausted all efforts for a diagnosis and until Jon...Jon-Jon…shows any new symptoms, we are at liberty to provide him comfort care for the remainder of the evening, but he will need to be discharged in the morning. We've exhausted him enough with MRIs, blood tests. I'm at a rock in a hard place, Dr. Cavill."

"The rock or the hard place where you give up on a child's well-being simply because you haven't thought to see him as a person? Rather as a number on your statistical analysis of how functioning this hospital is?"

His eyes pierce through you and make your knees grow weak. The nurse staff usually talks about him being a cuddly bear, always making the children laugh and smile. But this man before you, why he's no cuddly bear. He was a beast of a man. A grizzly in fact. 

"Now see here, I will let you know that this case is very important to me. All the children are. But what you fail to see is that for whatever reason you've gravitated to this particular case, you're chasing something that doesn't exist." 

His broad shoulders and strong neck tense at your words. He blinks methodically, as if he's scoping out his prey. No, don't let his charm and rugged good looks distract you. This is a man who is used to getting what he wants and you are a woman who knows perfectly what to do with that.

"And I believe you're blind, Doctor."

"Excuse me?" Your voice was shrill and short. "This is borderline insubordination. I'd be careful with your next words, Cavill."

"Pardon my frankness, Dr. Y/LN, but I've been here longer and know these patients in and out," his voice raised and you could see the hint of a vein showing on his thick neck. "Some of the children come from very poor and debilitating environments. We can't just cast them off once a diagnosis doesn't stick simply because we need the bed or we're done trying!"

"DR. CAVILL," you exclaim and let out an exasperated sigh. His demeanor changed and his upper lip curved slightly. 

“Dr. Y/LN. With all due respect, I think you’re making the wrong judgement call here. Things are not adding up with Jon-Jon, if we just give it a few more days...I feel like we’re making progress and I’ve labored enough research into it-”

"Again, while I appreciate your passion...”

“Passion which you need to show for the patient-”

You raise your hand to silence him, “This is not up to you, Dr. Cavill. As Chief of Pediatrics, this is my call. We will discharge Jon tomorrow if he does not show any new symptoms. If you disobey any further protocols, I will have no other choice but resort to disciplinary action. Do I make myself clear, Doctor?"

You press your hands on your desk and lean inward, portraying your stance. 

"Perfectly," he responded. 

"And another thing, I -" you start, but he turns and abruptly walks out of your office, leaving your door open. 

The nerve! Did he really just do that? Where does he think he's going? Didn't I just tell him I'd resort to disciplinary action?!

You rush out of your office and you see him striding through the hall. His strong posture, shoulders back eluded to years of boarding school perhaps or military. You noticed his fists were clenched and it gave you slight satisfaction that you chipped away ever so slightly at his ego.

It was going to take a lot more than that to send you packing, you thought. 

----------------

The next day came and went. You had confirmed that Jon-Jon was discharged with the floor nurse and while you were relieved to have handled that quite professionally, you knew it did not bear well with the rest of the staff.

You were still getting your feet wet and learning more about your team. It was solid overall, many years of expertise collectively, but they treated you like the outsider you were. No requests to meet for lunch or drinks after work. No camaraderie birthday cards seeking your signature or date night advice. Just the normal days in and out, pulling many late nights in your office, up to the point of exhaustion. You'd collapse in your double bed after work, stare at the ceiling of the small room you rented from your cousin, Laura, and try to drown out all the bustle of seven people in the same 3 bedroom flat. 

Just like any other day, You sat alone during lunch. But that never really was ever a bother being used to it now. You were excited about an audiobook you were meaning to dive into and right when you were about to use your airpods, that's when you noticed him enter the cafeteria. 

His presteen, crisp white lab coat was tight around his build. You could tell he took fitness seriously and wondered what he was hiding underneath it all. You unknowingly licked your lips as you watched him search for a fruit out of the bowl off the commons counter. Curious to know what he fancied: was he into a sweet apple or something more tart like cherries. 

He picked up a peach and squeezed it with his massive hand, making it look quite comical considering his size. His eyes met yours and you quickly looked away, trying to now draw any attention to yourself. You fumbled with your phone as you connected to the audiobook and heart his footsteps approached your empty table. 

"Good afternoon," he said. His voice was deep, smooth, and inviting. Not at all like the day before in your office. 

You play coy and don't bother to look up, fidgeting with your sandwich. 

"Hello," you reply distantly. He made you nervous. Would he bring up yesterday's conversation? Will he continue to look that delectable each day?

He smirked and took a bite of the fuzzy peach. There was a slight crunch as he dug his pearly whites into the rounded fruit. The velvet and thin layer of skin eased off and entered his mouth; he chewed slightly and let the piece swirl around with his thick tongue. 

You peered to look at him and his stare hadn't relented. He took another bite. This time the luscious juice slips out of the white-yellow fleshed fruit and down slightly on his chin. Oh, to be that piece of fruit and have him ravish you that way.  How he’d expertly use his hands over you and taste you with those lips.

He can tell you're still distant, however he notices you're unable to tear your eyes away from him. 

He walks over, closer to you now, and you can smell his cologne: a woody aromatic scent tied with a hint of suede. It's downright delicious and with the mix of the peach, your senses are in overdrive. 

What is it with this man and his ability to excite and anger you all at once? You not only want to put him into his place, you want to do so right here on the cafeteria table and have your way with him.

"Lovely day, isn't it?" He smiles devilishly and places the half eaten fruit on the table next to your phone and walks away. 

Your cringe and use all your might to not look back at him. He's going to make this very hard for you, very hard indeed. 

[xawkward-ariesx]

👀

This is from a post-Flux ficlet that I haven't finished yet where I take the 'I looked into the TARDIS and she looked into me' line to mean that part of Rose still exists within the TARDIS. It doesn't contain any spoilers but I'll put it below the cut just to be safe:

"You're going to lose her if you keep doing this, ya know."

She doesn't need to see the Doctor's face to know that she's rolling her eyes in frustration but she can see her anyways. Though she may be stood behind her, the position of her physical manifestation doesn't really matter. In a sense she is the TARDIS, she can always see the Doctor.

"Rose, you're here. Goodie." The Doctor says sarcastically as she turns to face her golden visage.

Rose - or more accurately Bad Wolf - leans against a crystal strut still damaged and leaking from their run in with time.

"I'm always here, you just choose to ignore me." The Doctor rolls her eyes, bringing a hand up to swipe at the tear that had escaped. "And I hate seeing you like this."

"You," The Doctor spits accusatorily, pointing a finger at her, "Are not even really here."

Rose sighs following after the Doctor as she rounds the console trying to shake her off.

"I am here. Part of me lives within the TARDIS just as part of the TARDIS lives within your mind. I may be a fragment of myself but that makes me no less real." She knows the talk of fragmentated selves will hurt but sometimes it's the only way to get the Doctor to acknowledge that they're hurting.

The Doctor flinches as expected and Rose almost wants to take the words back. But the Doctor isn't the only one hurting here.

"You think I haven't seen you like this before? That mask of forced joviality you wear while avoiding your pain is awfully transparent."

"You haven't seen anything!" The Doctor whirls round, teeth gritted as she snarls at her. "You weren't there. I was grieving you and all I had was a room, memories and this! A false image of the woman I'd lost."

"And you'll lose her too if you carry on! Opening up and giving her hope only to push her away again when being you gets too difficult."

They're squaring off now. It reminds Rose of lifetimes ago when she used to argue with her first Doctor - her first not the TARDIS' first - when her leather clad Doctor would push her away when he couldn't cope instead of letting Rose in. Because the Doctor is wrong, she is Rose Tyler still.

I like the idea of there being two Roses just as there are two Doctors a Bad Wolf!Rose for the Timelord!Doctor and a Metacrisis!Doctor for the Human!Rose

Thanks for the ask sweetheart!

[isthisclever]

The Other Side Chapter 19: Commentary

SPOILERS BELOW FOR CHAPTER 19: NEW YEAR // PLEASE CATCH UP ON "THE OTHER SIDE" BEFORE READING

So Chapter 19 was, for all intents and purposes, the beginning of Arc III of this story, and it is the climax/denouement arc. It'll likely be shorter than the other two arcs (10 chapters and 8, respectively), but I'm not yet entirely sure how many chapters it'll end up being. Broad strokes are planned but not prewritten, and the finer details still need to be figured out.

Now on to the commentary!

I really wanted to show the Frasers in this flashbulb family moment. Like, Hogmanay in Lallybroch with wee Brian and Fergus and everyone's really happy and fulfilled is this defining moment for them that I think they'll end up looking back on for the rest of their lives. But, let's not like, it's also a moment that will bring great pain because it's exactly what they'll always known they lost.

In this fic, Fergus is a little more fragile after losing his hand than he's shown in canon. We see in the later books his struggles with his mental health and the practical results/consequences of being disabled in his society, but we see very little of that in the books/show right afterward. I really think this is, in large part, because Fergus at that time knew he was a really big support for Jamie, who was still dealing with his depression and his grief. Fergus had pain, but even as young as he was and knowing the guilt Jamie carried for what happened to him, he really had to be the support for Jamie almost and couldn't really express any of that pain. But here, he hasn't had to live with being Jamie's reason to keep going on. He hasn't had to grapple with his hero drowning in depression and grief. So here, he's a lot more able to open up and let his vulnerabilities show. I wasn't sure what specifically he'd confide in them until I wrote it, but it kind of made perfect sense to me. He's seen Jamie and Claire, and even Jenny and Ian are shown to be deeply loving as a couple. And at this point in canon, he's right on the cusp of courting/sleeping with girls, and it made sense that this would kind of be on his mind. That he's just started that part of his life/development, but now he's afraid he'll never be wanted again, and will that mean he won't ever find the kind of love he sees in the adults in his life?

I also wanted this convo to happen because Claire was feeling really passive in this chapter. When I posted about the chapter not being right, that was exactly the problem. I had this whole thing where Jamie goes around before midnight on Hogmanay and gives toasts to everyone (including an indignant wee Jamie, who was offended he didn't get one). But it was kinda boring, kinda repeated a lot of stuff he's said already, and Claire really had very little active involvement in the chapter. I really liked this a lot better. Canon focuses heavily on Fergus's and Jamie's connection, but I try to explore Claire and Fergus just as much. Especially in those months after Faith died, Fergus and Claire really were comforts for each other. But beyond that, I think there are just some times you yearn for your mother's comfort, and I wanted that here. That he loves Jamie of course, and he idolizes him even. But he really needed to feel safe with his mother. Even though Fergus is now closer in age to Jamie and Claire (at this point, he'd only be ten years younger than Jamie now), they've re-entered his life at a point that he really needs them as parents, even though they're closer in age.

Also, a small thing that kinda happened on accident, but Jamie and Claire are almost always the ones carrying around Brian; in my head, they never really hand him off to Mrs. Crook. But I see this as a natural reaction to them having lost Faith, having come close to losing each other so many times. They now have this baby that they just cannot let go of unless it's between one of the two of them. I think it's also a tell that, subconsciously, they know that they aren't completely safe.

Oh, boy, the redcoats arriving! This has been a scene that's played in my head since I decided they were coming back to the past. I wanted to do a sort of flip on canon Jamie hiding from the redcoats with wee Ian. I knew we needed some action to start off this arc and what's to come, and them being shocked out of their false sense of security was the best way forward, I think. They've made general plans but haven't firmed them up yet, both thinking they had more time as well as really dreading when they'd have to leave. Earlier chapters have seen them both kind of grappling with the emotional toll of knowing that this time with their family is temporary. There's also a brief discussion about why the stones may have brought them to this year specifically...I think more of that will be made clear by the end of this fic.

Also, can we say Mrs. Crook for the win for not only getting Rabbie out of the house to warn Eilidh about the lie they told, but also managing to distract the redcoats so the Frasers could sneak from the house? Runner-up MVP next to Ian for concocting that story on the spot and Jenny for having the presence of mind to use the letter to their advantage!

Thanks so much for reading! Hoping not too long before Chapter 20 is ready.

[crownin-thestars]

There's a Reason Why

You know who Mega is, right? Everyone knows him as that one mute kid, but they don't know why he's mute and they don't seem to care.

But Mega wasn't always like this

Mega was usually a quiet kid around children his age and older, being quite shy and was always teased for his birthmark location. When he was around those younger, he would usually come off as a bit of a bully because of what he says to them. The only reason he did that was to get rid of stress from both school AND home.

His household was even more stressful, having a single mother and being her only child. His father had filed a divorce agreement but was unable to gain custody over Mega due to his mother presenting false cases. This resulted in, of course, Mega living under his mother's roof.

False cases? His mother sounds like the scummiest scumbag in the world, and I can assure you that that may or may not be true. The reason she wanted custody over Mega was because she was never able to reach her own goals, and with a child, she wanted him to achieve them for her. She never cared about what he wanted to do, all she cares about was that her son absolutely needed to become what she expected him to be.

This woman forced her son to be a perfect child. All A stars in school, always obedient at home and always helped her with housework. (For the record, I don't exactly know how grades work in America, an A star is the highest grade you can get on an exam in my country and a U as the lowest, standing for ungraded so I might go by that)

When Mega had told her he wanted to create content, this set her off. His mother yelled at him, so much that it brought him to tears. He was never yelled at like that for so long, the words that came out her mouth sounded like they were came from another. Mega heard things like 'You were a mistake after all' and 'why can't you let me make you great'. He didn't want to hear anymore of it, running off to his room and locking the door.

Mega's mother thought he had changed his mind, yeah that's how entitled she is, but she soon found out that she was very wrong.

Mega had come home one day on his phone. He wasn't even in the house for a minute when his phone was snatched out of his hands. He was slammed into the wall, causing a few things on the shelf next to him to fall. His mother asked him what he had been doing when he hid in his room.

Nervous, he stuttered out a 'nothing', flinching as his mother raised her arm. She screamed at him for being a lier, and told him that she had been keeping track of who and what he was texting. Mega could feel his blood go cold. Knowing who he was texting would mean her knowing what he was planning, and considering what had happened just a few days ago, he already knew she would not react well.

Mega managed to break free from his mother's vice like grip, snatching his phone back before bolting to his room. The slammed the door shut, locking it. Loud banging and screaming coul be heard behind the door. No matter how much she screamed, he wouldn't break the only barrier he had between him and his mother.

He leaned back on the wall opposite the door, his body sliding down as tears fell from his eyes. He grasped his arms around his head, trying to keep the bad noises out. Mega whispered to himself through the sobs as the banging continued. Why did love feel this painful?

Mega had come home from a long day at school. He entered his home, expecting a greeting from his mother. Nothing was said. He quickly checked the kitchen and her room, no one was in there. Mega smiled to himself. He had the home to himself till she came back! It was still noon, so he had just hoped that his mother would only come back in the evening.

Mega enjoyed the hours he was alone, not having his mother there to tell him off. He had played a few games on his phone and watched many, many videos on YouTube. In the middle of watching another video, he looked up to check his clock. It was already late at night and she hasn't come home yet.

He was confused, getting up from his bed. His mind was interrupted by a wave of pain in his stomach. I haven't had dinner. He thought, making his way to the kitchen. Mega looked in the fridge, no leftovers from the night before. That's fine, leftovers aren't the best of foods to eat. He opened up the shelves, only finding a few cans of soup and some instant cup noodles. Guess the noodles would have to do.

It was the next day, had to be a school day of course. Mega did his usual morning routine, the only thing different was that. . . His mom still wasn't home?

He sighed, going around the house to find some cash to bring along with him. He opened drawers and looked under beds. There wasn't a single penny in the whole place. He looked over at his piggy bank, a sort of last resort. He went to pick it up and shook it, sighing with relief when he heard the sound of coined crashing against the metal casing. This money he saved was meant to be a little bank account for the things that he might have wanted. Removing the little cork at the bottom, he shook the money out, it was just enough for the bus rides to school and back for about two to three days.

He grabbed the money, shoving it in his pocket. Time to get to school.

~Smol timeskip cuz again idk how America schooling systems work~

On the bus ride home, he had attempted to contact his mother, ending with it hanging up immediately. Staying on his own was an intimidating thought, and he wanted to know when she would be coming home.

He entered his home. Mother isn't home again. This time, he wasn't happy. He has never been isolated by himself like this before. That's fine. . . I'm fine. . . He assured himself. His mother was gonna come home at some point. Right?

It had been a few days since Mega had seen his mother, or had an actual interaction with someone. How many days? He had lost track. He wasn't able to go to school anymore because he didn't have money to take the bus. Mega could feel himself losing a bit of his sanity, but it was kept intact with the texting of his online friend. The house was in a bit of a mess, and at this point he didn't bother to take care of it. He couldn't tell if he missed his mother or not, the only feeling inside him being. . . Almost nothing. He kept on reassuring himself, making sure he doesn't do anything stupid.

That's fine. . . Uh oh- A noise was heard from outside the house. He couldn't tell if it was a wild animal, a burglar or his mother. Not taking any chances, he went to hide away. Mega bit his lip, afraid to make any noise whatsoever. Hearing footsteps entering the apartment made his heart beat rapidly. He peaked out of his hiding place to have a look at what was happening. He saw two adults, one woman and one man, possibly a couple, looking at the small mess of a home.

Mega must have peaked out for too long, the woman feeling something watching. She turned to where he was looking out from and saw Mega. Scared, he quickly hid away. He heard soft whispers as the sound of the trespassers footsteps was getting closer. Tears had started to drip down as the footsteps got louder and louder. Mega bit on his lip harder, trying his best to not let the crying overpower him. He knew they've found him, he knew he couldn't do anything. So he just sat there in fear.

They'll hurt you. He thought. That's all people do to you.

Mega looked up, taking in the new faces in front of him. His fear immediately caught up to him as tears burst out. He quickly tried to hide his face, trying not to show weakness. (I mean like he's 7 cut him some slack-)

He heard some sort of packaging open as a small scent of cookies filled the area. He peaked up and saw that the woman was offering him the delicacies. He accepted them with gratitude as he started munching on them. They reminded him of how his father made them when they were still together. . .

The man came to sit down next to the young, scrappy and hungry child, ruffling his hair a little bit as the woman knelt down in front of him with a smile. Mega cherished the company he had around him, softly chewing on the chocolate chip cookies given.

This was the most loved he has felt in so long. . .

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Word Count: 1621 words

HAHA I'M FINALLY DONE WITH THIS!! Bro I ran out of words to write at the part where the couple came into the house, so the ending might have sucked a bit, but I still quite like that ending.

Also watched Hamilfilm recently, currently obsessing over the songs, hence that Hamilton reference I put in there.

Also yes I made a 7 year old smart as heck because why not? Dream was able to connect his computer to his neighbor's electricity when he was 15 so it's possible to be overly smart at a young age.

Side note that these are the very same people that decided to take care of him and help him grow up.

Side note #2 if you haven't guessed it yet the issue I was wanting to raise awareness about is child abandonment. I don't know how well I did with writing this because I consider myself to be a privelaged child.