#i've only ever worked part time retail before

[pyroselkie]

ohhhhhhh i get it now. working 40 hours 5 days a week actually destroys you from the inside out, huh?

[ceasarslegion]

OK...I'm asking....

Yay!

So this happened in what I consider the worst job I ever had. And that is saying something because I very much worked retail in a mall. I had just graduated uni, I couldn't afford toronto anymore, and I needed a full-time job to make ends meet now that the stability of university was gone. So I went to edmonton because I had one family member I could stay with until I got on my feet. And I was not in a position to turn away a job that paid.

So I took a door to door sales position. For telus. I can hear the canadians in the room wincing so to everyone else: telus is one of the three whole mega megacorporations that control the ENTIRE canadian telecommunications network. And all three of those companies are buddy buddy and have us all by the balls. That's why canadian phone plans are the most expensive in the world. Not in the developed world: in the WORLD.

The meth lab incident happened on my 3rd whole day on my own. I was in St. Albert, which is this suburb of edmonton that is like if a kale smoothie and that guy who won't shut up about bikhram yoga had a baby they abandoned in an HOA meeting. Which is what makes this that much more unhinged: it was in the most cookie cutter suburbia part of the EMR.

So I was doing my knocks in my blue Jay's hat and my telus branded polo shirt with my clipboard and I knock on my next door. I'm greeted by a middle aged woman who proceeds to dump on me that she's divorcing her husband of 30 years and moving to New Brunswick. I'm like okay cool I just wanna sell you cable packages, good luck with that?

I write that off and continue along the cul de sac until I knock on this other lady's door. And when I say talkative I mean a real chatty Kathy. She practically grabs me by the collar and plops me down on her deck chairs, shoves a coffee in my hand, and says "HEY TELUS GUY DID YOU KNOCK ON METH GUYS DOOR???" And points to the house of the lady who just told me she was getting a divorce

At this point I have forgotten about my commission. I have forgotten about my shitty supervisor and how every part of this job sucks and how I wanna go back to Toronto. I have thrown away my clipboard I have started sipping her coffee that could very well be spiked with something and I go "you have to tell me about the meth guy"

That house I knocked on? The weird oversharing lady who was getting a divorce? Her husband was running a meth lab out of the basement THEIR ENTIRE MARRIAGE and she ONLY FOUND OUT THEN?? He called it his man cave and said that she wasn't allowed in?? And then one day she went down out of curiosity and it was a METH LAB??? All the bonuses he said he got at work were meth money.

I'm still enamored by how this happened. Did it not smell? Like for those who don't know edmonton there is a HUGE meth problem here. Like across the political aisle we all agree that something has to happen about all the meth, the details get foggy and that's where people argue, but needless to say I have smelled and been offered meth before just by virtue of living downtown. That shit REEKS. Like you know meth smell because it somehow smells like the word "meth." You will know what you are smelling even when you've never smelled it before. And it lingers. It hangs. It gets into walls. I know when I've taken a train car before because the smell of that guy who hotboxed it with meth smoke last week will still kinda be there. There's no way that house didn't smell like ass down to the foundation.

And the "you arent allowed in my man cave" excuse... im enamored by both the sexism towards his OWN WIFE and the way she just... went along with it for 30 years? Never set foot down there? The sexism and the just believing it?

I kept trying to steer the conversation back to the meth lab and this lady I was on the porch of kept actively trying to buy internet deals from me. Like she was the only person I ever pitched who was TRYING to get my bundles. I ended up just handing her my list of products and told her to check off what she wanted and was like "more meth lab?" And she went right to "yknow i think if I was your age I would've been a boy now. We didn't really have those terms when I was a kid" I DID NOT BRING THAT UP MA'AM I DONT HAVE TIME FOR YOUR GENDER CRISIS TELL ME MORE ABOUT THE METH LAB

That job was so shit that that was the only one I ever quit with no back up plan and did not regret for a second. I then went to the mall and handed out CVs and got my retail job by the end of the week from doing that.

[vivwritesfics]

Keep On Rolling - MV1

Chapter Six

Summary: Lando's best friend having feelings for anyone on the grid? Impossible, right? She worked with them, sharing her friendship with the grid with the world via the FormulaY/N youtube channel.

After film a video including... spicy water (alcohol), everything changes between her and a certain world champion. Good thing she hasn't had a crush on him since his F1 debut, right?

Right?

1.9K words

Series Masterlist

A/N: I've actually had the best day (and it's only midday)! Did a couple of hours of studying, completing one of my essays, went to the outlet shop and found my perfect pair of cargos (my friends all look for xs so I feel bad when we go retail therapying, but I went alone and I'm so happy)

Silverstone. Lando's home race. Y/N couldn't wait. Ever since she was a little girl, Silverstone had been one of her favourites. When they were kids, Y/N's father had taken her and Lando to Silverstone. It was the first race Y/N had ever attended, and the race that let Y/N fall in love with Formula One.

It had been a full month since Y/N had last spoken to the current world champion. Y/N didn't know why Max wasn't speaking to her. Or answering her text messages. He'd been missing out of Y/N's life completely for the last month.

For once, Y/N had nothing special planned for Silverstone. Just a simple Q and A video.

Y/N missed the Friday free practice. Where she'd usually be there to watch Lando and the rest of her friends (namely Charles), but, this time, she was at home with her family.

British families had some weird traditions and Y/N's family was no exception. Every Sunday in the winter months they ate a huge roast dinner and every Sunday in the summer was reserved for having a barbeque.

With a job like Y/N's, she didn't much get to see her family. She was always away at the grand prix or the city hosting them. Her family missed her, sure, but they knew she was living her dream. So, whenever she was home, Y/N made sure to visit them.

Y/N sat at the dining table, checking her phone. Nothing from Lando, nothing from Charles, nothing from Danny. Nothing from... Max.

That was the most upsetting thing. Y/N hadn't spoken to Max in so long. She didn't realise she'd miss him until he disappeared. There had been a couple of times where she'd text him, but he'd only read it, not respond. Y/N was getting desperate. Desperate to hear from him, but they weren't in a place where she could beg. Right?

"Dinner!" Y/N's mother shouted as she and her brother ran in the dishes. Chicken, potatoes, sprouts, carrots, parsnips and more. Y/N's mother always went above and beyond with roast dinner. It was a whole performance for her.

Y/N allowed her mother to plate up her food. It was something she loved doing whenever Y/N was home, her way to welcome her back. "Mum, do you think we can watch the free practice?" She asked as her mother placed a Yorkshire pudding onto her plate.

"What? No way!" Her brother suddenly shouted across the table. "If Y/N gets to watch formula one I get to watch football!"

"Neither of you are watching anything. Y/N is going to make the most of being here with us before she makes her way up to Silverstone, okay?"

Y/N's mother was not a scary woman, not by any means. But, when she commanded something, it happened. Y/N and her brother nodded as they tucked into their food.

Y/N checked her last messages to Lando and Max beneath the table. Lando hadn't yet seen her message, but Max hadn't responded. A small part of her wanted to throw her phone at the nearest wall, but she didn't. Instead, Y/N slipped her phone back into her pocket and tightened her hand in a fist, nails digging into her palm.

Her family could tell something was wrong. Normally it was non-stop chatter about the world of the paddock. But, aside from her request to watch the free practice, Y/N didn't talk about formula one at all. Even when her brother tried to ask, Y/N answered with single words.

That night, in her childhood bedroom, Y/N looked at the pictures of her and Lando. Them in school, them at Lydden Hill for Lando's Karting career. Silverstone when Lando was in F2, Lando when he first joined McLaren and that was it. The rest of the pictures were in Y/N's own apartment, a place she hardly saw the point in paying for when she rarely lived there.

Her phone began to ring. Picking it up, Y/N placed it to her ear. "Hey, Lan," she said to her best friend as soon as she answered.

"How's your mum? How's your brother? How's the cat?" He asked quickly.

The cat in question was currently sleeping on Y/N's bed. The moment she moved out, the cat began living in her room, sleeping on her bed or in the empty closet.

"Mum is good, brother is good, cat is good," she said, sitting beside the cat and stroking her fur. "How was free practice? I tried to watch on the television but Mum wouldn't let me."

Lando told her all about free practice and how his day at Silverstone had been. He told her about the media things she and Oscar had to do, the fun he and Carlos had been having and more.

When he fell silent, Y/N found herself asking a difficult question. "Lan, is Max okay?" She asked him. "Does he hate me or something?"

"No," Lando answered quickly. "Why would he hate you?"

"Can you tell him to answer my texts then please."

Lando didn't answer that. How could he, when he was the reason for Max's silence? But, he couldn't tell Y/N, either. He could tell her that he was the reason Max was refusing to speak to her. So, Lando took it in a different direction.

"What's going on with you and Max?" He asked. His tone was genuinely curious, leading Y/N away from his crime.

Y/N shook her head. "Lan, nothing. Nothing is going on with Max and I. He was just the only person who let me interview him in Monaco. He just happened to be the person who helped me out after the drunken quiz video. Why does that mean something has to be going on with us?"

Again, Lando didn't answer. Guilt ripped through him. He was selfish, a selfish little boy. He drove Max away from Y/N just because he didn't want to lose his best friend

Lando was quick to end the call. He said his goodbyes and left Y/N to it. Max liked Y/N, he knew that much. But did she like him? God, he felt like a child back in secondary school as he thought about it.

***

"Hey guys, welcome to the Silverstone weekend," Y/N said to the camera as she sat on her bed with her cat in her lap. "As you can see, we are not in a hotel room for once. We are actually in my childhood bedroom and we have a visitor." Y/N held the cat up to the camera and waved her paw.

"Today we're going to be going in with a Q and A video," she said, pulling up her phone. "I know a lot of you have a lot of questions around how and why I do what I do, and I'm going to answer them all."

She went into her twitter and pulled up her first question. "Right, question one. How did you meet Lando?" She read and put the phone down. "Oh, what a story this is," she said and let out a little laugh. "When Lando and I first met each other, we hated each other. We were eleven years old, both starting at secondary school. In maths we got sat beside each other, and it all kicked off from there.

"Lando was so loud! Seriously, he did not stop talking. And he spread his stuff to my side of the desk, which really pissed me me off. So, I told him to shut up and he told me to bleep off, and then we became best friends."

The cat in her lap was purring as Y/N stroked her. She grabbed her phone and checked for the next question. There had been a lot on there asked about the nature of her relationship with Charles and her relationship with Max. They were things she wouldn't get into, only because it would make the situation so much worse.

"Ah, what do you do when you're not travelling around?" She read and put the phone back down. "Well, I travel to the grand prix and then I explore the city the grand prix is held in with my friends. These bits I don't usually film, but I'm considering doing city vlogs. If you guys would like to see this, drop a comment."

Y/N went on and on, reading through the questions. There were many about hers and Lando's friendship, many that allowed her to grab pictures of little Lando from the wall.

"What is your favourite quote from anyone on the grid at the minute?" She read.

It made her grin. "Well, I've got one that I use all the time which is when Charles says 'Lando we can be world champions', but I'm a big fan of those noises Danny makes? You know, 'ki ki ki ra!'" She shouted.

There was a noise from downstairs, her mother shouting a complaint.

After getting through at least twenty of the questions, Y/N checked the time on her phone. "Oh my," she gasped when she saw how late it was. Or, rather, how early in the morning it was. "I guess that's the end of the video," she said to the camera. "Thank you guys for watching. Like, subscribe and I'll see you at Silverstone," she said and got up to switch off the camera.

Taglist (Open): @sticksdoesart @eviethetheatrefreak @eugene-emt-roe @glai1023-blog @mqcherie @itsjustkhaos @chonkybonky @arian-directioner @lazybot @lpab @princessria127 @fangirl125reader @honethatty12 @larastark3107 @urfavouritef1girly @cassiopeiia24 @callsign-scully @lexiecamposv @dl-yum @savagecelery @laneyspaulding19 @formulas-bitch @teenwolf01 @gayfrog29 @fictionalcomforts

[dana-chan-the-control-brain]

I enjoy Ted and Bob cuz you are not afraid to let us hate them. Heck, you originally introduced them both to be hated by us in-mass! I've commented before how Lives AU gave us more facets to Dadler, after you gave us so many reasons to hate him and then go "but look at this pathetic we mew mew" about him. And Bob gets it in the main Lofi fic too (less pathetic mew mew and more like "oh hey, guess he's not ENTIRELY ass)

Adding the layer you created these characters to be hated.. but they are not truly villains, just antagonists for certain parts of a story. Then show us their humanity. You allow them to show good sides too while not claiming it washes them free of sin.

LAYERS!

LAYERS EXACTLY!

Like... The thing was that Ted was originally created to be like "the main creator one-off guy that was a fucking asshole and dies to progress the story"

Like back near the start, I didn't even really have a name for him, and it shows.

Just by Ted saying vague shit like "you don't need to know my name" when it's really a basic ass name (which is funny to me)

But as I kept building him as such an intricate part of Sun and Moon's trauma and backstory.

I saw a lot of me in him. Especially during my "Dead inside" years of Retail work (especially when I worked two jobs on like two hours of sleep a night for around three years) .

And I kinda adopted him. Because in a way, he was a part of me that needed a lot of healing I wish I had at that time.

Sure, you can take his story in Lofi at face value and not really bother to read the Lives AU if you don't want and just say,

"oh he's a fucking stereotypical asshole dad to fill a role who got what was coming to him"

And yeah, that is true, but at the same time, they are robots, and Ted was very sleep deprived, and I doubt he thought a lot of things through, as shown in later flashbacks, when he seems genuniely shocked when Sun told him that "umm hey, our pain receptors were on?" "OH SHIT. My bad" "wait? you weren't torturing us on purpose? But you acted like you were?" "oh that was probably the demon drug rabbit don't worry about it." "oh okay............THE WHAT?"

There's a lot of Lofi and Twins only readers who hate Ted, and I won't take that away from them if they don't want to read an au where asshole ocs go to therapy. Lol

I really am enjoying writing the chapter of Lofi right now. We'll get a lot of "Bob antagonist" moments, and you can actually see what cause Sun and Moon to HATE Bob so much, instead of being told it by Protag and the Boys in Twins.

Bob will be at his worst, And I slightly worry that everyone will just see that and throw him in the fire cause he's "Mean to the Sun and Moon blorbos" lool

But honestly, I feel Sun and Moon befriending Bob at all in Twins shows expentiual growth on his part, and if you read Twins. you'll be able to see the contrast of how Bob was like five years ago, compared to how he is when Protag enters the picture.

God, I'm just so excited for everyone to hate Bob all over again.

I hope everyone recovers and still likes him by the end of all this.

In Lofi, Bob will be the biggest fattest PILL you have ever took.

[eslanes]

Little work rant below because I am on day 7 of an 8 day work streak with only 1 day off in between before I get to do it again. I am TIREDD

I decided I hate my casual/now part-time job but I am stuck as I'm working for my husband's bosses in their retail store as a favour for the summer. The shop sells their very successful clothing brand plus is a skateboarding shop. Which I know nothing about as I've never been on a skateboard in my damn life. Anyway, they knew what they were getting but the regulars still don't like me/think I'm an idiot but whatever.

So yesterday it was on wheels busy. It was a super stressful day full of tourists and skater dudes getting frustrated with me, waiting on a super unreliable acquaintance to come and fix a plumbing issue (he did, 5 fucking minutes before I closed so I was also late leaving yesterday) plus it being 28c with no AC. Miserable. Because it was so busy and acquaintance had half the shop taken apart, I didn't get a chance to tidy/restock as I normally would. I come in this morning to a TON of passive aggressive notes from the manager about the work that I'm doing. Meanwhile, I had just agreed to pick up a ton of extra shifts for him, leaving me with on average 2 nonconsecutive days off every 3 weeks. This is not to mention the only training I ever received was maybe an hour (from another part-time employee) like 2 years ago.

Anyway I'm so over it. If I wasn't worried about the impact it would have on my husband I'd tell them to fly to fuck because this fucking sucks lol.

(I'm also trying so hard to push myself and get stuff done for the business I'm trying to launch but the life is literally being sucked outta me at the moment.)

[pardonmydelays]

*gasp* My stories are inspiring you? Ahhhh, I'm so happy to know that! I hope you figure out what industry truly makes you passionate and just go for it one day. ♡

I actually spoke to a mother and her daughter last week while ringing them up, and her daughter told me Brooklyn is quite affordable - surprisingly enough. Although I'm taking that with a grain of salt, it was wonderful to know, especially coming from someone who lived there for a year. I think it was for an internship. I totally would've swapped LinkedIn with her if her mom wasn't there because I then would've had someone I personally "knew" but wasn't, like, friends with that I could talk to about apartments and stuff. Anyways, so...uh... I'll be looking at that now (as well as other states)! I do want to leave retail but honestly, at this point, if I can even find a good, salary paying job for assistant manager at a clothing store (I swear I've seen it before, and I totally qualify for mid-senior level!) then I'll take that in the meantime while I continue to seek fashion PR jobs. I'll look at internships too, but not for school credit since I already signed up for the alternative course that replaces an internship. Yessss, take that risk! Things will get better eventually, right? I'm all for things not being easy at first. Besides, moving to a new state won't be the most terrifying thing that's happened to me. . . 🙂

I'll keep you updated but through personal message going forward!! Have a great day, and, again, thank you. ✨

[Lin-Manuel Miranda blowing a kiss.gif]

~🌼

absolutely! i love listening to people who are passionate about something & you are clearly one of them, it makes me super happy & it really is inspiring! so thank you for that ❤️

honestly, brooklyn sounds more than fine (damn, i would literally sell my soul to live in ANY part of new york lol)! & i'm so glad it's actually affordable for you - that is definitely something to consider. & i truly believe it may be actually easier for you to find a great job once you move there (not that i know anything about living in the usa, but i'm pretty sure it works like that in every country haha, new city - new opportunities!). this is a huge change in life & i hope it will give you more strength to follow your dreams! also, i'm throwing in this picture, because once i read the word brooklyn, my fls brain started speaking again:

sorry for that no i'm not 🤭

btw, moving out is only terrifying at first, but then you finally start breathing & it's the most amazing thing ever.

once again, you're welcome & have a great day as well (or evening? night in my case - it's almost 1am here lol) ❤️ & see you next time!

[Lin-Manuel Miranda blowing a kiss.gif] - ok, let's make that happen:

[digi-tama-in-your-pocket]

Heya, I was wondering, is the Tamagochi Connect a good Tama to start out with? I only ever had Digimon V-Pets and the only time I touched Tamagochi itself was from the GBA-Games (which I never get how they actually worked tho lmao). But I'm curious about it and might wanna give Tamagochis a try

I mentioned this before but I never had a Tamagotchi Connection. I only had the original Tamagotchi and a Tamagotchi Angel as a kid, and in my adulthood I've had Tamagotchi On, Pix Party, and Uni. So I can't definitively say, but I can give you my insight.

I hear from the Tamagotchi Community that they're a fan favorite, far more beloved than the original Tamagotchi. Some even say they're the best Tamagotchis.

If you like the original Digimon v-pets, original Tamagotchi is a lot like that, except there's no battling and there's a mini game instead of training, and I believe you have to be more careful when raising your pet to get the adult stage you want.

If my understanding of Tamagotchi Connection is right, Tamagotchi Connection was like the original Tamagotchis, but with many more animations, way more minigames, a currency system, a much bigger evolution tree, and the ability to connect your Tamagotchis together.... to do what? I never really learned that part.

This re-release seems to be based on version 3 of Tamagotchi Connection which everyone says is the best, as the first two are seen as being basic. Version 4 was about sending your Tamagotchi to School and getting jobs, Version 5 was about raising an entire family of Tamagotchis, and version 6 was about your Tamagotchis becoming music stars, and that's the last of the connection line. I do wonder if they'll make more versions of the Connection re-release.

From the sound of it, the Connection does sound like a good place to start, it gives you the full Tamagotchi experience it seems, especially since it's going to be a retail item and will be affordable compared to the more fancy color screened devices ( though I notice the Pix and Uni get listed for pretty cheap on ebay at times )

I'd say yeah, try out the Connection.

My nostalgia biased ass will say gen 1 and gen 2 are perfectly fine places to start as well but I know in my heart that they're really basic and even for fans of original Digimon devices, they might not hold their appeal. The only thing they might have over later Tamagotchi releases is that, for me personally, I like the character designs better.

[theintrovertbean]

Rules & Masterlist

Because we love an organized page full of loving women.

Rules:

The stuff I will not write:

Anything that promotes discrimination (homophobia, transphobia, racism, sexism, etc.)

Characters that are any other species than humans (wolves, creatures with tentacles, etc.) Vampires, I might consider I grew up watching Twilight

Violence, pedophilia, zoophilia, animal abuse, body shaming, sexual harassment/sexual assault

Character death and dead bodies

Characters that are not Nadia. Sorry, I haven't read the other routes, but I might do it later. For now, this blog worships only one Goddess. (It does not mean that a character can't appear for a scene or a few sentences. Like, Portia can totally enter Nadia's room during a scene to take out the teacups or something.)

Things I will consider:

Smut. I spent my entire teenage years reading NSFW content, and I have written smut before (I'm actually writing some Nadia smut right now, idk if I'll ever post it), but it's just ehh. I'm trying, but my smut is boring as hell. Still, if someone has a request, I can try, but I can't promise anything. Spicy headcanons are more than okay. Of course, sex should always be consensual, so please, ask according to that. I love NSFW headcanons, so send as many as you'd like. I've changed my mind. You can send me smut requests.

Serious topics. There are certain things like mental illnesses, nightmares, etc. If the request promotes healing and personal growth, then I will do it. Just look at my Do you ever feel lonely? series. Think of something like that.

I mostly write about gender-neutral reader/MC, but they can be any gender. They are always at least 18 years old. I do not wish to promote any hate or hurt anyone.

I'm a human too, so please, keep things civilized. Saying thanks is always nice. If a request is, well, troublesome, I will probably just delete it.

Masterlist:

Headcanons:

Bike girl Nadia

Nadia with an MC who still has red plague symptoms

Devil!MC x Nadia NSFW headcanons

Nadia x cheater MC headcanons

Nadia and Chandra bonding with MC and their familiar headcanons

Jealous Nadia headcanons

Nadia x Icy MC

Nadia with an MC who is Lucio's sibling

Nadia x Disliked MC

Modern AU Nadia's career

Nadia x Fem!MC, who is horny all the time

Drunk Nadia headcanons

Nadia's reaction to MC standing up for her

Nadia Satrinava headcanons

Nadia calling dibs on MC

Nadia x Shy Reader

Nadia and MC's arguments

Nadia with an MC who has motion sickness

Nadia with an MC who has vitiligo

Nadia kink headcanons post 1/Nadia kink headcanons post 2 (they're the same, but the first one didn't work appear for many people)

The animal wing

Nadia with an MC who has low libido post 1/Nadia with an MC who has low libido 2 (same as the previous one because Tumblr hates me)

Grandma Nadi headcanons

Chaotic Nadia headcanons

Mommy? Sorry.

Nadia x MC with mommy issues

Nadia x MC with cat traits

Nadia x Extroverted Fem!Reader

Nadia wedding headcanons

Switch Nadia discussion

Nadia with an MC who has a big, affectionate family discussion

Nadia x quietly angry MC

Nadia x Jealous MC

Nadia x MC who wants a divorce

Submissive!Nadia headcanons

Nadia voice headcanons

Nadia x Astronomer MC

More biker Nadia headcanons

Nadia x MC who prefers living at their shop

Nadia's reaction to MC's parents disapproving of her

Sugar Mommy Nadia headcanons

Nadia x MC who mimics animal noises

Nadia x MC who apologizes a lot

Nadia as a retail worker

Nadia x Elf MC

Nadia x F!Chubby MC with low self-esteem

(It was getting too long, I had to put a break here)

Nadia x MC who wants a divorce part 2: The return

Nadia x an MC with a thirst for knowledge

Nadia x MC who freezes when they're flustered

Nadia x MC who is painfully oblivious

How Nadia realized that she loves MC

Nadia is an obsessive partner (essay, I guess?)

Nadia's reaction to receiving a 16th century ring that unfolds into an astronomical sphere

Nadia is Sleeping Beauty

Nadia and physical touch + a little guide to comforting her from someone who also tends to withdraw

Nadia is a rich girl

Nadia x MC who knew Nazali before meeting Nadia

Nadia wet dreams headcanons

Nadia x Muscular MC

Nadia x MC who can't take things seriously

Smut, oneshots, etc:

The Devil never sleeps

The Pain Behind Her Eyes (Cheater Nadia x MC)

Everything That a Countess Needs

The Night is Ours (smut)

Spellbound Desires (smut)

Real (Nadia x Reader smut)

Love in Bloom (Nadia x Dara)

Wounds of Magic, Scars of Love (Nadia x Dara) series

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Do you ever feel lonely? oneshot series (Nadia x MC):

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Other works:

Which Satrinava siblings are married/in a relationship (in my opinion)

The Arcana Main Six + MC as The Phantom of The Opera Characters

Main 6 as nicknames I call my gf

Some things about my OC

Satrinava family's reaction to finding out that MC died and came back to life

The Main Six and the types of movies/series they'd act in

Main 6 and the types of high heels they'd wear

Main 6 and the kitchen duties I'd task them with

Main 6 watching Saltburn

Main 6 x Dara relationship dynamics

If one of the links isn't working, please, feel free to let me know!

The masterlist will be updated in the future.

[iliveforyouilongforyouvesuvia]

HI

ive been ever so sneakily updating the playlist on yt, mostly for lucio my beloathed and im here to share

BUT ALSO i went to look at lucios official playlist to check for repeats and was appalled to find that it was like half comprised of julian songs istg. im kidding of course its subjective but still the bidding?? THE fucking Bidding???? THE most julianest song ive ever heard and its on Morgassons playlist. i simply cannot even with this.

and so to start this off im giving the floor to julian with the entirety of Tally Halls The Bidding! *polite applause*

I've been sleeping in a cardboard box, Spending every dollar at the liquor shop/ (yeah this ones obvious) And even though I know I haven't got a lot I'll try to give you lovin' til the day you drop/ 🥺🥺(wait i just remembered mc technically has dropped one time already on his watch but i suppose hes learned his lesson bhjzdljzg)

I've been training like a Pavlov dog, Let my independence out to take a hike/(😩😩🙄🥵😤😤🥺come ON this is the most julian line ever) All you're gonna have to do is ring my bell/ (ok confession time i edited this line because this is the first time im actually reading it and im sorry but it looks so wrong who tf says Activate my Bell what in the hell) And I'll fetch you anything you like/ (in summary: heeeere subbysubbysubbysubby)

Going once, going twice, Every man here has a price/ (i highkey Love this one so much in relation to the game in general because boY DO THEY fucking EVER have a PRICE THEY GOT ME CRAWLING BACK EVERY DAY GRINDING FOR THESE DAMN COINS) Over where? Over there, sold To not a single lady in here

I've been here like a thousand times, Dated every woman in the atmosphere. I've been to every continent, Broken all the hearts in every hemisphere/ (mmm yaass we love a well travelled king. also yeah i can see that other bit being accurate, he is a catch) And if I'm not the type of guy you like to circumvent, Just remember not to love me when I disappear/ (yeah that sounds like him alright)

I graduated at the top/ (Mmmm we LOVE a medical degree king slay) I like to take advantage of the bourgeoisie/ (maybe not exactly how it happened i mean he worked for him for the most part but i count it as a lucio reference lmao) So if you have a fantasy of being a queen, Maybe you should blow a couple bucks on me/😏😏

Going once, going twice! Won't these gentlemen suffice?/ (*brain animatic director voice* pan over to the rest of the lads standing at their respective game show-y podium stands; a somewhat disgruntled asra, lucio preening for anybody paying attention, muriel's left already) Any here? Any there? Any motions anywhere? Going twice, going thrice, Guess this means we'll go four times a lady

I promise I'll be all you'll need, ever need You'll never have to shop around (don't shop around) And I'll give you all you'll ever need, ever need, Don't worry I will never let you down, let you down- Don't worry I will never let you down/ (admittedly this doesn't sounds exactly like something he'd say, the insecure avoidant wretch of a boy kjbdfkjadf maybe a bit later, god knows hes trying bless his little heart)

So many ladies are wanting for mates, And the prospects are good but the date's never great- Over here, over there, over where? Anywhere! They're too busy with winning the bidding to care! And he's sold!/ (*film director voice* the gavel bangs one last time, the doctor & mc pushed into each others embrace laugh together before going in for a kiss; curtains fall; brain animatic over, credits roll kbhsrjkdgh)

Alright lets get the lucio show on the road number one: Central Cee Retail Therapy which ive been obsessively listening to basically every day now for some reason but also im skipping like half the song literally only because i genuinely could not understand wtf hes talking about in there lmao

Fly uptown when I'm feelin' down I wanna do retail therapy/ (only kind of therapy i can imagine him pursuing) Been with the gang all week I need some female energy/ (ok tbh i dont remember how it went with him and nadia before they got together but this line just has me picturing him in his soldier mercenary days, back home from whatever job, done with boys nights, lookin to get bizzayyy) Sucked my soul, I lost my breath She got me breathin' heavy, Toxic relationship with my queen But me and the T got chemistry/ (ok im just now learning T means trap house but imma pretend i didnt see that gjhfhkgk)

Told her that I'm a Gemini Now she on Google checkin' the compatibility, She wanna see if I got the agility She wanna see if I got the ability/ (this bit may be silly but the first time i heard this while thinking about lucio i just instantly went "omg itd be funny if hes actually a gemini and it fits" and i checked, hes not, of course hes capricorn lol (but also wasnt there that one time when they gave him two birthdays on accident jgxgnvgs that just makes this even more in character bear w me) and after i learned that i just instantly reasoned that, at least to me, him lying about his star sign to get with nadia totally sounds like something he would do xD im not sure i can see him putting in the effort of actually researching which sign is compatible with nadia, but i mean hey he wants to bag a whole princess hes got a lot riding on this he might as well memorise some charts dgkhgj/ ok update i did in fact google the compatibility for cancer/gemini and its utter shit😂😭 she actually supposedly is more compatible with his actual sign but also, like. come on. look at them. if any relationship can be used to prove that thats all kinda bullshit or bad writing for a game about all this astral stuff? its probably them lmao

I went 'round three, she want round four- she killin' me, ADHD, my trigger finger fidgety

Walk in- Walk-in wardrobe look like the stockroom - Mum said I'm materialistic/ (literally canonically them fr shes such a hater bmvxhkhx) When you're the boss, that shit will cost, I'm buying my mumzy a crib for Christmas I'm livin' a movie, but it ain't scripted/ (oh honey if you knew how scripted your life is) God is my witness, get out my business, Back in the day I had one pair of trainers I wore that shit 'til it gave me blisters/ (also pretty canonically accurate sentiment i reckon with the living in a hardcore arctic hunter tribe situation n whatnot)

numba tew: Panic at The Disco's Emperors new clothes~ the music video for this one kinda fits the vibe for his storyline too a little bit at least aesthetically lol

Welcome to the end of eras, Ice has melted back to life - Done my time and served my sentence, Dress me up and watch me die - If it feels good, tastes good, It muuuust be mine~ Dynasty decapitated, You just might see a ghost tonight/ (kinda could describe his debut as a ghoast (ghost goat?)?)

And if you don't know now you know

I'm taking back the crown/ I'm all dressed up and naked/ (naked ghoast ass mf) I see what's mine and take it (Finders keepers, losers weepers) oooOOOh yeeeah, the crown/ So close I can taste it, I see what's mine and take it (Finders keepers, losers weepers)/ (yeah this bit speaks for itself i think, pretty biblically accurate lucio characterisation)

Sycophants on velvet sofas, Lavish mansions, vintage wine~ I am so much more than royal/ (i mean. mister I Deserve Everything. cmon) Snatch your chain and mace your eyes/ (man i dont know something something devil deal chains😭)

If it feels good, tastes good, It must be mine/ Heroes always get remembered/ But you know legends never die/ (yeeesss YYYEEEEESSSS UGH the auDACITY)

number 3: Nick Lutsko's Sometimes!

Swinging for the fences, Hanging from the moon, I cut my tongue on the rust of a silver spoon, I bet my billionth bottom dollar on a hopeless case-/ (i like those two lines for him being a nepo baby theyre so nice and evocative) And now the devil on my shoulder has a knife to my face/ (obvious allusion is obviousing)

Racing toward the mailbox With a letter in your hand But the postman's gone away, and you begin to understand- That you're no hero to this story, You're just another wretched pawn, Who bought his tickets to the sideshow And then slept through the alarm/ (UGH this song is just good i dont even have anything to say about that little blond bitch anymore htkjyufh no theres something in there i swear. about him taking on this bigger than life endeavour to acquire all this unimaginable power and dealing literal demons and barely even taking it seriously sometimes and not realising how played hes getting)

Sometimes the short end of the stick is the sharpest/ Sometimes the only road to take is the darkest/ Sometimes all you gotta say is "mommy make it go away"/ Sometimes the only way out is as a carcass💀

Sometimes you gotta finish what you shouldn't have started/ Sometimes you gotta shoot before you see the target/ Sometimes mommy's gonna say, "You're not worth the price to pay" Sometimes the tunnel only leads to darkness/ (this is where im cornered into admitting i only associate this song with lucio cause of the mommy issues. yippee)

im not saying anything but if you havent heard these songs before theyre reeeally fun to listen to and worth checking out i prommy👀 i enjoyed thinking through this so much im not great at Lucio so the details might be iffy i hope it made any sense thank you bye goonight🥰🥰

@tetsuoooooooooo HII!

Ugh I can't begin to say how much fun it was to read all of this, thank you!!! I always love how you unpack the lyrics for different characters ^.^

I've just added all of your suggestions to the playlist and I'll put them on the tag too. (Istg I will never be able to listen to The Bidding the same way again, you've effectively Julian'ed it for me XD)

Cheers friend!

[boltedfruit]

Employment Struggles

I'm going to do something shocking and use this as an actual blog post.

I am SO sick and tired of applying to jobs, only to be ignored completed, or even worse the interview is scheduled and then the role is filled before I can interview. Today the interview was cancelled a minute before the scheduled time. Then the person who would be interviewing me ignored me on email and phone.

I am mentally exhausted. I am broke all the time. I don't get unemployment because I've never been eligible for it. The only good thing about this is that I have full healthcare coverage and food stamps.

I am a medical assistant with experience, I am a certified professional medical coder with internship experience, I have experience in retail, yet I cannot even get a call back from McDonald's, let alone a good healthcare job.

I've considered becoming a behavioral health tech, but I just truly don't want to be hit/bitten at work. I also couldn't deal with the families of children disagreeing with a preset therapy plan while I'm physically stuck in their home. The other options I was looking at was security, or 911 dispatcher, but dispatch classes are few and far between into next year, and also expensive. And security can be dangerous.

At this point, being 30 and just defeated by how unsuccessful I am in life, I am considering going to a trade school. Like welding. Or automobile tech or something that is actually in demand. There is literally no other options for me and I'm literally five minutes outside of San Francisco. I am mildly considering an IT course, but tech is so unstable and unsafe while also being over saturated right now and I don't trust it. But then, you have to deal with stereotypical personalities in 'conservative' trade jobs too. The other risk is I spend time and money doing a trade school and then no one wants to hire me (like I've done twice now). I don't know what to do.

The trades I'm considering:

Electrician

Welder (part of machinist trade) (honestly this is most appealing to me)

Aircraft Maintenance Technology (Can't hurt with SFO next to me and their planes literally falling to pieces in the sky every week)

HVAC (still don't really understand what this job even is)

The guilt I'm feeling is that I am about to finish my BA in psychology next month, and I'm waiting to hear back from the two colleges I applied to for a Master's to become a therapist. If I get in to my top choice, that's $60k+ I'll need to fund. If I get into the state school, which is slim, that's likely covered by school loans, but I'll still want to make some kind of income for three years I'm in the program. If I don't get into either program, then my last choices are: work while getting med school pre-reqs done, or work while doing an online MFT program (which I really don't want to do an online only program but if it's accredited at the end of the day I don't care.) The online only school would also be $60k+ so I'd need to work regardless.

I'm feeling guilty too because I've never been the fanartist who can drop a new print and have thousands of followers want it. I can't make money that way. Commissions have always been my most lucrative offering as an artist, but it's often mentally very taxing. It's also unstable. I don't have a lot of followers to drum up a successful pays-my-rent-every-month Patreon, and with the way of algorithms and sites are these days, I likely won't ever. I'm not trying to complain for sympathy, but this is just how it's been for me.

I know it's stupid to feel guilty for things like this, but I just am in this nebulous space between being apparently unemployable while also not being unemployable enough to receive livable benefits while continuing job hunting.

So I guess I'm looking for opinions on trade professions. I'm trans, but I pass masc in public save for my voice really. I also am not the kind of person to wear pride pins or color my hair rainbow, which would draw attention that way. I'm not too concerned about mean people in a trade job, because honestly the rudest people I've worked with have been in healthcare anyway. And a trade job would mean no customer service positions/working with my hands, which requires little mental gymnastics.

Also pointless, but true, I keep thinking of Debbie in Shameless getting her welder certification after becoming a teen parent.

I guess the takeaway here is, I'm more willing to be hurt on the job by a machine mistake on my part than I am willing to be hurt by other people assaulting me (very real in healthcare jobs/security) while working.

What do you think?

[quannaix]

abelia and sage?

abelia ⇢ do you have a particular piece of jewelry you always wear or can’t part with? Not that it's jewelry exactly but for me it's my watch. I got my first watch in year 2 and I've had one ever since and I wear it every day and I feel really weird when I don't have it on. Only exception is for a couple years I didn't wear one all the time because I was working hospo full time, but literally as soon as I got my next job (retail) I went out and bought a new watch I was sooo excited.

Before phones, I always thought it was funny when I had to get a new battery and the person would tell me to come back in ten minutes like. My dude. I don't know the time you have my watch.

sage ⇢ what ‘medium’ of art (poetry, music, fiction, paintings, statues etc.) is the most touching to you? why do you think that is?

This is soooo hard to answer because they can definitely all resonate with me. Probably most reliably i'd have to say fiction (books), I find so many books have really stayed with me, and there are so many I return to time and time again because I so desperately want to spend time in their world again.

Thanks for asking!🥰✨

[goldenpinof]

Not that this is like, a hot new take or anything, but I can imagine that they both might be going through a bit of a crisis. Like their careers have finally died down but like, what do they do. They haven't done much else but be YouTube personalities (which is more than just YouTube, obv) for like, nearly 15 years. They are probably afraid to venture into new territory, because at this point that will likely mean risking either their brand or their bank accounts (like how Dan had to risk money to do the tour / offer to put up his own money for Dinok). Not that that's a good excuse, but I can understand being afraid and Phil just trying to hang on to his usual content for the both of them (as he also figures out work/life balance). Dan only did DD for the tour and it definitely felt kinda forced. Just doing their old stuff but with their older/out-of-closet selves isn't going to be successful in a way it's safe, for now.

As someone with a lot of the same kind of mental health struggles Dan has, I imagine he might be beyond burnt out and doesn't really want the attention anymore because of the work it requires. And even though it's like, okay it's been months since the tour okay what's next... idk what we'll really get out of him for a while (maybe a few years even?) besides random contract work like the channel 4 thing. Like, projection time, but I just got through grad school with extreme ADHD/executive dysfunction/procrastination etc, and was so burnt out by the end idk how I did it. And I'm like, oh well it's been about 6 months I should probably have a job in my field by now (which I'm probably insane for thinking that anyways because the job market is in so wild). But like, I've been kinda burnt out since 2016 (when I was 16 and a junior in high school, at the end of my og dnp phase) and all I can muster the mental energy to do now is the same part-time / retail work I've been doing the past few years. Which like, I'm barely getting by and I do ultimately feel disappointed that I'm not trying harder to put my fancy new degree to work because I'm barely applying for anything. But I just can't get myself together enough to do that right now. I imagine Dan might be going through something similar, like, he could be doing something creative but he probably is just tired and wants to just live life without any expectations and go on vacations and rely on Phil to be the content creator. He's probably aware that it's not ideal. But he also seems done with compromising any creative vision either because he doesn't want to do sponsorships or anything that isn't a deeply personal piece of art. And he probably doesn't have many deep ideas now that WAD is done and Dinok is stalled and there isn't much he seems to want to do commentary on (because if he just sucked it up he would actually be a pretty good commentary YouTuber lol).

I think they also have a lot more stuff to work through mental health wise too before they are ever really able to not be cryptic about their relationship, since when ex-phannies or random people who remember them see their tiktoks or whatever it's what they all ask about. Like to some degree I don't know if they ever wanted to be out and famous but it got to the point where they couldn't keep denying it either. I'm so glad they came out because it's clearly so much healthier, but beyond the trauma of being closeted that they had to overcome they probably now have trauma from years and years of people being weird towards them about their relationship and it's like... now they have get through that in order to take the next step. do they really want to go through all that just to help open themselves up to a new era of content? Idk.

(this turned out to be wayyy longer than I anticipated woops. can't even remember if some of this was in response to what was on your blog or some of the other similar conversations I've seen about this today but yeah).

i'm almost crying. i hate us so much. this is exactly why the phandom needs meet ups irl or "bubbles" where we could have conversations. because trying to answer THAT without forgetting something is hard, and also i can't imagine how hard it is to write these mini-essays and get bullshit in response.

i appreciate it a lot. and i basically agree with your message. i see how it can be true. and i know that in case of burnout, Dan can let himself step back. the problem i have with him disappearing and coming back after 2018 is that he thinks that the audience will wait for him and accept everything he puts out with the same passion, participation, and amount of money as when he and Phil were making content without long pauses. but book sales, merch sales, tour ticket sales, views and god knows what else that we can't see show that we aren't willing to wait. and it started in 2019 i guess, so you would think that by 2022 Dan would understand what went wrong and just book smaller venues (or make a smaller stage for it to not be a problem). i'm using wad just as an example. you said Dan could not want attention anymore. but he repeatedly says that he loves attention. and it's not only words, you can see it irl. ofc after tours there is a period of time to rest. but before that, there was a clusterfuck of something that was barely content while the merch releases were consistent. either because it was pre-made or because Dan was still living in a rose-colored world thinking that we would buy stuff without content. i'm not sure what i'm arguing here anymore riuehdfsidxkl apologies, i guess it's related to Dan wanting to fuck off. and he CAN. i don't care, 2019 taught me a lesson. (doesn't mean i can't bitch about it <3)

anyway. i understand your struggles with work and degree. basically, i was in the same position after graduating, and now it's even more difficult but i get it. choosing to work part-time, in retail and similar "easy" jobs because you can't deal with the weight of expectations that come with a degree, that's... yeah. an adult reality that no one told us about. i wish you the best, and i hope everything works out well. whatever you decide to do, remember you don't have to use your degree if you don't want to or just don't feel like you can at this moment. you know, getting a fancy "serious" job is such a commitment, bruhh. and you can always walk out of retail :)

Dan would be a brilliant commentary youtuber, you're right! he just knows how to talk and make people listen.

their brand is already fucked, nothing to save here. i mean, Dan and Phil brand doesn't exist. Dan's youtube brand is all over the place. AmazingPhil is the only consistent thing. and yes, it feels like Phil is terrified of shifting in any direction. we're stuck with 2016 content, it's like a real-life time machine on youtube. and if it works for him, fine. i'm just sad that there is no "trying new things" anymore and that he can't even get old successful things back.

i'm not commenting on their relationship because it would be too long. fuck tiktok though. i think dnp jumped to this "new popular" platform with no actual regular content to present as a distraction and that bit them in the ass.

[theopenbookwigtown]

🏡 Back home in Shropshire, but what a week it's been. 🌟

Grateful for everyone who joined our journey - the locals' warmth, the visitors' love for The Open Book. 😍

It's been the most wholesome week we've ever had.

🗓 18th - 23rd July 2023: ⏰ 41 hours open 🤝 319 people greeted 🐶 16 adorable dog visitors 📚 81 books found new homes

As I've been doing all the posting this week, Gary wanted to say something...

I did not want to be a bookseller. I wanted even less to pay for the privilege.

Stephy had other ideas, however, and it’s in my nature to follow her lead even when I’m convinced she’s gone off the deep end. And so, in 2017, we booked our place at the end of a 3-year wait and Stephy impatiently dreamt of our upcoming trip. This, I believe, is called “foreshadowing.”

2 days before our trip in 2020, we were all locked in our homes for the foreseeable future. And so, in 2020, we booked our place at the end of a 3-year wait and Stephy impatiently dreamt of our upcoming trip.

I tell you this to emphasise that, despite two 3 year waits and a pandemic, I was no more enthusiastic about our bizarre little holiday. I was convinced that we would see too few customers and I would be bored out of my mind or, much worse, that we would see too many and I would be forced to relive the retail experience that made me promise “never again” as a teenager. Either way, I was terrified that my anxiety and my atrophied social skills would leave me trapped in a solid week of awkward interactions and uncomfortable silences.

I ran these scenarios in my head, preparing myself for any eventuality, but I could never have anticipated that I would fit in almost immediately. We were soon visited by many of the locals, invited to events and welcomed into their stores as though we were regulars. This strange, wonderful place embraced us with everything from casual Good Mornings shared across the quiet road as we all set up our signs and displays, to conversation in the street to compare notes after closing. It is rare that I feel a sense of belonging, but I found it here and instantly fell in love.

With the help of Stephy's boundless energy and contagious enthusiasm, I fully discarded my shell within days and, by week's end, was actively greeting everyone who walked through the door with a genuine “How are you today?” like some kind of crazy person.

It was in this question that I found the real treasure of this place, the thing that makes The Open Book far more than the sum of its parts: Those who visit, do so looking for a story or two, sure, but if you ask them, and if you listen, they often gift you a story in return. We encountered people bursting with the kind of joy and wisdom that only comes from a life well lived and learned important life lessons that we will carry with us forever. All it took was a word and an ear.

The dream, the one I didn't understand, can be found here in Wigtown but you are missing the point if all you are looking for is a quaint, cosy stay in a bookshop. The Open Book wouldn't work anywhere else because The Open Book is Wigtown. There is a perfect storm here. The right people in the right place at the right time with the right idea have created something truly magical. How else can I describe something wonderful that shouldn't exist, but does anyway?

This is a place where a modern shop with modern comforts exists but the penny sweet is alive and well, where a parade of 40 horses might run right by your front door and bagpipe music can be described as "spontaneous", where a "little concert" is both cosy and breathtaking in equal measure, where you can enter a store to the sound of live banjo music and learn of the owners attempts to purchase a life-sized triffid, and where you will learn the secret to a long happy life is to pull up your socks, always be curious, never stop learning, and buy a second TV for your spouse.

In just one week, a bookstore had become a home, a handful of strangers had become neighbours and friends and a holiday I would gladly have missed had become a memory that I will cherish always. I leave this place healed and inspired, thankful for the kindness and the stories that I will take home with me, and saddened beyond measure to say goodbye so soon.

I did not want to be a bookseller, but I will be forever grateful that I was.

Until next time, Wigtown.

💛 Stephy & Gary

[mayalaen]

20 questions for fic writers

@whataboutthefish tagged me - thanks Fishie!!

First, my AO3

How many works do you have on AO3?

191

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

2,150,989

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Supernatural, Stranger Things, Fargo, Stargate, Dickensian, The Blacklist, The X-Files, Angel the Series & Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and I'm probably gonna pick up a few more soon.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

CONventional Psychopathy 'Verse - SPN AU Tumblr Ask Box Requests - SPN 40 ficlet challenge Alpha House 'Verse - SPN AU Resonance 'Verse - SPN canon verse with angel sounds Best Brother Ever - SPN with a technique that has gotten me the most questions from readers saying "does that really work?" Yes it does.

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do, but sometimes it takes me a while to respond because I get weird and shy about it at times. I love comments and read them over again when I need a boost!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I don't usually have angsty endings, but with CH challenge fics I go ahead and do shit I don't normally do - so Inside (SPN) would be the angstiest ending.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Probably Splintered - ST fic where I throw a lot of shit at the guys but they all get a happy ending.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Yup. I delete comments and asks immediately though so readers and followers hopefully never see any of it. I don't play that game.

9. Do you write smut?

SO MUCH. SOOOOO much.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Open Sesame Street Walker has to be the wildest one I've done. It was a challenge fic. A choose your own adventure style thing, and I wanted to make every outcome disturbing. I did it, but at the cost of ruining Sesame Street for myself and others 😂

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Yup. CON 'verse is still being sold on a bunch of sites and the "author" is continuing to add more books to the series. I've tried a few times to get them taken down but only succeeded in getting things taken down for a few months. Out of all the fics that could've been stolen, that's the one that's the WORST because I'm also writing it as original fic and have been for years. I've got proof of that, but if retailers fight me on it when I try to publish, it's gonna suck.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes. A few.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I wrote a few years ago but haven't in a while. I'd like to do it again!

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

No way I can answer that. I'm definitely a multshipper at heart, and I can't even decide on favorite characters, let alone a favorite ship!

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

Rewritten in the Stars is something I'd love to finish, but I don't know if I'll ever be able to get in the headspace again. It's complicated and rewrites aspects of the characters while sticking closely to canon with a lot of moving parts over a 30-year time frame. The first part of the series feels complete if you read it, but I have 30k written of part 2 and a full outline for part 3.

16. What are your writing strengths?

The thing I get complimented on the most is my worldbuilding. I also think I'm good at natural dialogue - making it sound like actual speech instead of written word.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I have trouble condensing things and it gets wordy 😭

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I've kinda sorta done it with alien language and angel language, a few words here and there of other languages - most of it just English in italics to show that it's not being said in English. I don't think I'd ever try and use an actual language I didn't know for more than a word or two.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Stargate SG1

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

CON 'verse is and probably always will be my favorite. 💜

Tagging from my activity list with no obligation to do it: @actualalligator @medusapelagia @wheels-of-despair @kallisto-k @ltleflrt @peachonified @underwater-ninja-13

If anybody else wants to play, please tag me so I can see your stuff!

[bradenthompson]

Book Announcement: Illcontinuum! (available now)

There's something buried under Wishkah Shopping Center.

Or that was the story Junior heard growing up.

Now that Junior's an adult, all his friends have moved away, and all the remaining artifacts of his childhood have been demolished or remodeled, 

Wishkah Shopping Center is all that remains of the world he was once so comfortable living in.

Now Wishkah is earmarked for implosion, and Junior had precious little time to confirm or deny the biggest mystery of his youth.

An eclectic dirge through a sacred retail monolith, equal parts silent and expired yet lively and inexplicable, Junior finds a titanic mall fighting against its own damnation, producing "ghosts" of its previous tenants and slowly revealing the all-encompassing role it had always been playing in his life. All roads leading to the inconvenient reality that Wishkah shopping center isn't the only thing doomed.

illcontinuum.carrd.co

I thought I'd be announcing Illcontinuum was done and available four months ago, but given the release day and the personal circumstances which this book was completed under, time really is just a friendly suggestion.

This is a book that really snuck up on me, fueled largely by the feelings I needed to unpack following my graduation from college last summer. At no other stage of my life, at no graduational checkpoint, did I experience the same listlessness and grief I did in those first few weeks after unpacking my dorm and heading home for good. In my dreams I was back at college but, obviously, that dream college was exactly such. In the days before taking the podium I'd smoke weed and play arcade games downtown (ever spiral before? It's not without fun) -- unpacking, alone, what exactly I was going to miss.

And it was from those liquid lunches (I'd have a bag of funyuns or something from the vending machine) that Illcontinuum took shape. I've long dug on the notion of liminal spaces but, if you'll let me be real, I do not like the popular set of feelings this suburban phantom pain has taken. Why does it have to be scary? Hm? I'll be less of a sass; is horror, or dread, or melancholy, the only valid emotions we can explore regarding the retail/municipal monuments we leave to waste away in the crannies of our minds? I don't think so. I think in-between there's a very real warmth, and if Illcontinuum were to be listed among "new horror novels" I would worry I had done something wrong.

The end result of what proved to be a turbulent drafting process (probably the hardest time I've had writing one book) is what I think is my most complex and satisfying work. Not always clear and not always meant to be taken literally, the novel enters Wishkah shopping center within a few pages and does not leave until the curious and socially diminutive Junior is cracked open, leaking personal gooey stuff all over the tile.

I'm not sure how that last sentence came to be but I can't bring myself to rewrite it. Anyway...

While reading, feel free to replace details. Readers ought to bring themselves to the text regardless, but do not fight the moments where Junior becomes you (not You from Radiosault but you in specific) and Wishkah becomes the mall you remember but will never see again. Ask yourself what it is you'd be looking for were you given the chance to go back. And laugh a little--the book is funny.

Without further ado, enjoy Illcontinuum. And keep in mind the three initials you'll enter at the high score screen. I use BRA.

[jezmmart]

Chamomile Comic Trivia #28

#146 - Really

This story arc was vaguely inspired by my job experience. I am A manager but not THE manager at my reluctant retail day job, but there's always something stupid happening and I've had to run the place for anywhere between a week to a month or two so many times over the years, so I had a few experiences to draw jokes out of.

#147 - My

Having said that, I feel no ownership or pride of authority, so this one is just fun with characters. In my head, the place that the customer goes to for buying something is just "the till" so I remember it took me a while to come up with, of all things, the words "service counter" - something for Layla to refer to that area by that didn't sound completely unnatural in dialogue.

#148 - Follow

Now this one IS very much based on my own experience going to management meetings and training days. Fleeting moments of inspiration in how to improve things and community with fellow management - followed by immediately getting slammed back down to earth by how hard the ideas would be to implement due to constantly stingy hours and how it's all just about making money in the end.

I remember once pointing out a hypocrisy in a company process during a training meeting. The trainer conceded to my point making sense then came to the conclusion of... "do it like we said anyway". Cool.

The fact that Layla is making notes and paying attention while veteran managers to her left and right doze off was also true to my experience, lmao.

#149 - Help

Very important lore drop here - the addition of the cute little staff only spiral staircase upstairs in the corner of the shop, which was a memorably fun thing to decide "I really want this in Cammie's shop, I'm always fascinated by them when I see them in a shop and ever since I was little always very upset I can't go up and down them" and then realise "right now I have to figure out how to draw that!!". I've checked the blurry backgrounds for the two comics where this corner of the shop was visible before and there wasn't any sign of it, so this is a very light retcon (those blurry backgrounds were very vague anyway though). A rare case of it being more sensible to draw the background in full since it was getting used for all 4 panels, so enjoy some uncensored spiral staircase:

I remember coming up with this joke when a Uni friend was visiting and we were just sort of riffing off each other with work related jokes or something, so this comic takes me back to fond memories of said visit generally!

If you look carefully you can see Layla has already performed her management teleportation spell in panel 3, behind the thief's open jacket.

#150 - Stop

The big 150! Well, it feels like a special number at this stage (250 also feels special, and then after that the 50s don't so much anymore for whatever reason). Either way I decided to do a quadruple lengther!

I haven't always followed this rule but I decided at this time at least, for extra-length comics, I still wanted each "page" to at least vaguely stand-up as a standalone comic too. In that context, the main purpose of going extra length is to keep the pace on a scene which I don't want dragging out across a whole month.

The spot Cammie runs by in this panel is the same one from comic #56, Cammie's footprints permanently a part of this street's history now. I know for sure these two extras in the foreground will show up in a few future comics when I couldn't be bothered to design new ones too.

The "helping the old ladies across the street" part of this chase is one of my favourite comedy scenes I've come up with over the years, I don't remember at all where it came from, I just enjoy it as a reader now, haha! I'm particularly proud his look back and Cammie's responding glare.

On the flipside I wish I could have come up with something a bit more meaningful than just "there is a dead end" to finish the chase but it's not really super important, the seagull joke is the point.

And now for something that hasn't come up in a Trivia post before - significant unused content!

For a short time I was thinking about following the above with a new arc dealing with an actual fallout from the shoplifting incident, with two comics scripted out. It's been years and I've never used or repurposed these so I think it's safe to share them. I reserve the right to still use a variance of these one day if it really feels right for another story though, not everyone reads these trivia posts, haha!

I'll let the scripts speak for themselves first.

Unused #151:

Unused #152:

From here the idea was that Bri and Cammie would have had a falling out for a little while (maybe a couple months worth of comics I was thinking) due to Bri, her dearest and most understanding friend, outright calling her stupid in the heat of her deep concern, sort of an expansion of the little moment where Vi genuinely hurt Cammie's feelings by referring to her "rampant idiocy" back in #59 / #62.

But as the deadline to begin work on the #151 approched I just wasn't coming up with anything I liked to follow that thread through, so in the end it didn't happen and we got... *flips page* a comic about Cammie putting a bucket on her head instead! Good stuff.

I still think canonically, Bri wouldn't have approved of Cammie's chase, but in this case she kept her frustrations to herself!

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