#i've never watched one ahs episode and i don't plan to but i like the openings

[rhys-ravenfeather]

Anyway, related to my post from yesterday, what's a thing you guys never got into, whether it be a canon show/movie/what-have-you, or even a fandom thing, but can appreciate for one reason or another?

[alacetor-the-duckies-deer]

I have this headcanon for Alastor's back story where he's trans, and just as himself, as he is in the show, even as a kid. So his parents sent him of to a convent, were upon ww1 breaking out in his late teens, he ran away, forged a new identity as a man, got found out once he was already over seas, blackmailed a superior into letting him stay on, where he was introduced to radio communication, and the rest is history.

But all that to say, I like to then imagine, whenever anyone tells him something mildly outlandish, but definitely true, he likes to respond with "Yes, Vox, and I took a vow of celibacy when I was a catholic nun"

To which of course people think, "so you don't belive me? I mean but aren't you a virgin? Are you not????"

And of course, this never gets asked because who's gonna ask The Radio Demom about his Sexy Life.

Angel Dust that's who.

I imagine him doing an interview on Al's Show, just a mix of publicity for them both, hanging out because they're friends, and it's all a big middle finger to the Vee's.

Maybe it's pride month and so they were planning some talk about that, Alastor joking about a possible comming out, even though its plenty well know Alastor is some where on the ace spectrum to anyone with eyes.

They get on the topic somehow, Angel says something like, "I never laid myself across the bar like that! Second set of arms at most! Never my butt, never mind my legs! not after the first time!"

"Mh-hm. You got desperate in your flirting, and I took a vow of celibacy, when I was a nun. We all do silly things, Angel."

"Well, maybe I've laid out on the pool table, but it makes for good pictures. Anyway, I been meaning to ask you about that."

"About being a nun?

"No," angel laughs, plays it off, thinking he's joking. "About your being ace and all. No pressure, but like, you really never even wanted to try?"

"No, I find it quite repulsive. The idea even,"

"You don't watch nothin'? Read nothing either?"

"Ha! No! The filthy little novel Sister Amillia sneaked in the once was quite enough- are you okay Angel?"

Angel had infact just chocked on his latte. "Wait? Sister Amillia? Sneaked in? To where!?"

"The convent, Angel. I was 14, she was 16. Wonderful woman, taught me how to handle a knife, she left shortly after the novel was discovered- Sister Tabitha was as squeaky a little rat as she looked- never saw Amillia again, though."

"Wait, sorry. You were a nun, like, actually? What the fuck?"

One of the little lights that says they have a caller lit up, but Alastor ignore it for now. "Yes, Angel, do keep up."

"Wait, so like that nun costume you wear on halloween?" Angel blows right past the fact Alastor just came out as trans, because yeah. Didnt see it comming but, the trains already wizzing by, and more importantly- "Is that like your actual nun costume?"

"Ha! No, I flung that horrid thing in a garbage can on my way to the enlistment office when I was 17."

"Enlistment?" Angels begining to see what Alastor meant when he said this episode was going to be a unique experience for his listeners at the start of the braodcast. "Like world War 1, right? You were alive for that..."

"Yes, I figured with all the confusion one little girl-"

Angel's phone goes off. It's Val. Angel hits ignore.

"Fuck off Val, I'm off today" Angel says into his mic.

But they get interrupted again and again until Angel turns his phone off.

At which point all twelve of the little light that indicate the show had callers on the line, light up.

"Ah fuck. What does he want that bad? Can you just answer it real quick?"

Alastor flips a switch and answers.

"The fuck you want Val-"

"I'm not calling for you!" It's Vox on the other end, his voice booming from the speaker "Alastor! Are you fucking serious? You were a fucking nun?"

"Yes, Vox." He says with faux patience. "My goodness, did you all stuff your ears with cotton this morn-"

"So you DID actually take a vow of Celibacy? The other day at the meeting during my presentation, you said "that'll work, Vox, sure- and I took a vow-"

"Yes. I was there."

"And!?!"

"Celibacy, among other things. If this is a dig at my sexuality than-"

"Nah fuck that, hang on I'm doing math! Okay you were born in 1901, makes you 17 in 1918, yeah that tracks. Okay so 2024 make you 123, minus the 17 years to be conservative, thats 106 yeah?"

"I was 15 when I took that vow, and under threat of being institutionalized, if that's what you're getting at-"

"108! Ha! Oh my God! 108 years! That's gotta be a record!"

"What are you getting at Vox?"

"You took a vow!" Vox screams through his laughter. "All the pomp and circumstance! On consecrated ground! before god!? To abstain from sex! And even here in hell, were sin and blasphemy are rampant and free-"

"Careful Vox, your televangelist is showing-"

"Who gives a fuck!? You're the one whos upheld their vow to God for over a century like some devout saint!"

Angel and Alastor sit there staring at eachother while Vox laughs his head off around them

"Saint Alastor the Abstinent! The pantron Saint of Virgi-"

Alastor hangs up. "Well that was informative!" Alastor chirps "Well, What's to be done about this? Hm, Angel?"

And for some reason, an unholy one, surely, the first thing out of Angel's mouth is "I could suck you dick? If that- would count?"

And it's a testament to how far they've come as friends, or pooooossbily Alastor's nerves, or maybe his sheer unwavering bravado, but Alastor only bursts out laughing, shaking his head as he get out between laughter "I don't- have one!"

And then they're both laughing and laughing and laughing, and eventually they calm down, and Alastor gets a thoughtful look. "Though, Vox did have one good point."

"Oh?"

"That does have to be a recorded, at least among sinners. Why! I very well might have redeemed myself! We should certainly bring this up with Sera at the next conference!"

And then their off both laughing again, imaging Serra's face when she realises she's going to have to look into yet more research onto the workings of redemption from Heaven's end.

[chahnniesroom]

tenderness | chapter 6: on my own

[noun] /ˈtendərnəs/

1. the quality of being gentle, kind, or loving

2. the feeling of pain, aching, or soreness

pairing: bang chan x female reader

summary: in a world where soulmates are rare and precious, you don’t know why the universe has decided to give you one. you never could have imagined that they would be an idol, and one that you worked with at that, or the challenges that would arise from your bond.

chapter word count: 4.8k

chapter warnings: jealousy (? not really a warning, but i'll include it anyway)

a/n: i was blown away by the response for chapter 5 (and the rest of the fic too). thank you everyone so much!! can't believe that we're already past the halfway point of tenderness, hope that everyone continues to enjoy it!

previous chapter | masterlist | next chapter | read it on ao3

It feels like you’ve barely fallen asleep by the time that your alarm wakes you. The hum of Charge between you and Chan is faint through the layers of clothing that you wear. For once, it doesn’t bring you any comfort. Although the two of you had maintained physical contact throughout the night, it feels like you’re miles away compared to the previous nights that you’ve spent curled around each other. You have no idea when he had finally gotten back to the dorms even though you had a fitful sleep.

The second you extricate yourself from the sheets and break contact from Chan, your stomach drops. Exhaustion seeps into you and you have to steady yourself on your bedside table to avoid losing your balance. In his sleep, Chan shifts, rolling towards the warm spot where you were previously lying, but doesn’t wake up. Remembering what happened last night makes things worse, so you do your best to compartmentalise it so that you can focus on the day ahead. One day with less sleep and less Charge can't hurt you, you think to yourself.

When you check the time on your phone, you realise that you must have slept through your first alarm and you’re going to be late if you don’t leave in 15 minutes. The adrenaline is enough to fully wake you up and you stumble to the bathroom in the dark. Somehow, after getting ready as fast as you can without waking anybody, you make it to the company in time. You’re lucky that the early hours mean that transiting was smoother than usual and you didn’t have to fight your way onto the bus. 

You unpack your things at your desk and head down to the room that was booked for the interviews planned for the day. The bright studio lighting that has already been set up exacerbates a pounding in your head that you hadn’t noticed before, but you ignore it to greet the staff that are already there.

When Eunsung enters the room and sees you, concern immediately creeps into his expression. He sidles up to you and bumps your shoulder with his.

“Rough night?”

You lean in close to him and whisper as if sharing a secret, "stayed up late rewatching a drama."

"Ah," Eunsung nods, immediately accepting your lie at face value. "Which one?"

"Moonlight Lovers. Last few episodes."

"Say no more. I've never been able to watch that without shedding a tear." You both laugh at that, knowing Eunsung could cry at a sad commercial. You don't know if he believes your story, but you're just grateful that he's playing along that nothing is wrong. He knows better than to prod too much, it’s a sure way to get you to instead close down even more.

"Is it really that obvious?" you ask quietly, fingers reaching up to poke the eye bags that you had hastily covered up this morning. You’re pretty sure that last night you had done a decent enough job making sure that your eyes wouldn’t be swollen today, but hadn’t had a chance to look at it carefully. Since you had barely enough time to get ready, you had hoped that you might be able to touch up your makeup more before starting work, but had been swept away in preparations the second you had arrived.

"No, I just know you too well." He laughs when you swat his shoulder half-heartedly.

The boys file into the room right after you’re finishing getting everything ready, but before you have a chance to leave the room. You smile and greet them with the rest of the staff, but studiously avoid looking at Chan. Just the brief glance when he had first walked in had stung. He looked… normal. Maybe a bit tired, but he always looked tired and well, that was what had gotten you into this mess in the first place.

Maybe to him, last night was just another night and you were being too sensitive. But his harsh words had reopened a wound in you that you thought had long scarred over. Somehow, it hurt even more thinking that he was totally unaffected.

You quickly try to pack up everything you need, handing out a timeline of the day to the team who are helping film that outlined which interview is for which company, what props, if any, are required, and whether or not a company representative would be present to help facilitate the interview. You make sure Eunsung has a copy of all the questions that Stray Kids are supposed to be asked and which are off limits, both in English and Korean. Almost all of the members are familiar enough with English that the interviews go smoothly without any other help, but a lot of the staff aren’t as fluent. You have a quick chat with the company translator and make sure she’s also comfortable with the schedule and what’s expected of her.

After making sure that everything on your checklist has been completed, you finally grab your things and leave, almost colliding with Felix in the hallway.

“Oh, you’re not staying, Y/n?” He asks, grabbing onto your arms to steady both of you. He smiles at you and you return it but look away quickly, not wanting to meet his eyes, and shrug off his hands.

“Sorry, I have some meetings that I can’t miss this morning. I hope the interviews go well Felix-ssi!” you call as you head to the elevator. When you glance back, his smile has faltered and he’s still standing in the hallway, looking a bit lost.

You’re not sure if he’s more surprised that you’re not going to be attending the schedule or your sudden return to addressing him formally. You had done your best to keep things more professional while at the company, but it had been surprisingly difficult, especially when most other managers also addressed the members more casually.

You feel a bit guilty, but last night had served as an important reminder that no matter how close you seemed or felt, you were still just staff. This time, you won't forget your place.

—

When you finally get back to your desk and open up your laptop after finishing all your meetings for the morning, you despair at the number of emails that have piled up in your absence. You start to sift through them, filing away the ones that don’t require any response. It’s probably a good thing that you’re not in a hurry to see Chan or any of the members, there’s a lot of work that you have to do in the next few days and not enough time to be distracted by attending schedules.

Your phone pings and you see a message from Eunsung waiting.

[12:14 pm - received]

lunch?

Huh, you hadn’t even realised it was already noon. Even though you hadn’t had a chance to eat this morning, you still don’t have much of an appetite. So far, tea has been enough to sustain you as well as provide the much needed caffeine after your late night. You’d had enough foresight to throw a protein bar into your bag before you left, but it still sits untouched on the side of your desk. You know that you should probably eat to help make up for the Charge that you missed last night, but you can't bring yourself to take a bite. Just looking at the bar is enough to make you nauseous so there's no way that you'd be able to stomach any other food. 

[12:15 pm - sent]

sorry. have a mountain of work to do so i don’t have time today

[12:15 pm - received]

:(

want me to bring something to you?

[12:17 pm - sent]

no thanks! i’m fine for now

[12:17 pm - received]

:(

you sure?

[12:19 pm - sent]

please do not bring me anything.

[12:19 pm - received]

:(

:(((

:((((((((

Amused, you lock and put away your phone and focus on your work. You really are scrambling to finish everything and probably wouldn't have taken a break even in normal circumstances. 

Only 15 minutes have passed before there’s a knock at the door. Nobody else is using this work area today and you’ve learned over the years that Eunsung is one of the most persistent people you know.

“Oppa,” you whine, not bothering to look away from your screen. “I told you I didn’t need anything for lunch.”

“Uhm.” Your neck hurts with the speed that you whip your head around to look. Chan’s standing halfway through the open door, looking out of his depth. 

He’s still in his outfit for the press junket, hair carefully styled and makeup immaculate. He looks like a different person. Sometimes you forget that the bare-faced, curly-haired boy in shorts and a hoodie that you’re used to is the same as the polished idol that is presented in front of the camera. He seems so far away, even though he’s right in front of you.

“Sorry, I thought you were Eunsung-oppa. He was… teasing me earlier,” you explain, embarrassed.

"Ah," he says. "You didn't eat yet?"

“Not yet, I’ll get something later,” you lie. “I have a lot of work to do.”

"Oh, okay. We have a break right now. I wanted to talk." He scratches the back of his neck awkwardly. “About… you know. Yesterday.”

“It’s fine,” you say quickly, forcing yourself to smile. You try to stay concentrated on the email that you have to send, but it’s hard enough to think of the right English words to use when you're alone. Instead, you stare at the blinking text cursor, already wanting this conversation to be over. Maybe it was better when you thought he didn’t care about what he had said to you.

“No, it’s not fine. I shouldn’t have said all those things. I was too harsh. I hurt you. I'm sorry,” he insists, stepping closer. 

You finally turn to look back at him, but still can't get yourself to look him in the eye, instead focusing on the cut of his jaw. His hair has grown long enough that curls are starting to gather below his ear even after styling. You wonder how long it will be until the stylists are able to wrestle him away from his laptop and into a chair to cut it again.

“Okay. It’s not fine,” you concede. “But I forgive you. I understand that you felt frustrated. I can tell that you’ve been wanting to talk for a while and I’m glad that I know how you feel now. The delivery was just… poor, but it’s really not a big deal.” 

That's not a lie, but your fingers start to curl into your palm anyway, nails digging into the flesh there. The tiny pricks of pain ground you, not stopping the hurt that came from Chan's words from echoing in your head like they had been the whole day, but distracting you from it. 

I don’t need you bringing me food. I don’t need you reminding me about schedules. And I definitely don’t need or want you telling me when I should be resting. 

It stung, especially knowing what he really meant when he said that. 

I don't need you. 

Looking back, you could see how you were acting overbearing. Yes, there was a soulmate bond connecting you two, but really that didn’t give you permission to act in such a familiar way. More than anything else he had mentioned, it had left a bitter taste in your mouth that he compared you to your eomoni when he now had the insight that your relationship with her had caused you so much pain. It hurt even more to think that maybe that was the reason he had mentioned her, that you had been that much of a burden.  

No matter what he argues now, there was truth in what he said in the heat of the moment, frustration and lack of sleep bringing forth his honest thoughts. 

I’m good now! I’m really good now. I was also good when you were not here. When you were not my soulmate.

You had never really considered what things would be like if you weren’t soulmates, there had been no point in it. Well, you hadn’t considered it until yesterday. After half an hour of trying to sleep with no sign of Chan returning, you had rolled onto your side and reached for your phone. With shaky fingers, you had pulled up Naver and typed in 'can you break a soulmate bond.'

The results had confirmed what you thought. There was no evidence of a bond being broken before. Of course, it was possible for soulmates to live apart from each other for extended periods of time. It just required more food, more water, more rest for both people in order to compensate. That seemed even more inconvenient than the current situation and you knew it would never work for you and Chan. 

This was the next best solution. You promised yourself that he wouldn't have to pretend that he wanted you around anymore. You'd keep your distance, stay professional, just like you had done before your First Touch. 

“It’s not how I feel, I was just-” Chan protests.

“Chan-ssi,” you interrupt gently, hiding your feelings by reverting back to the formal speech that you had used when you first met. He blinks in surprise. “I don’t want you to feel like you have to hide things from me. You don’t have to worry about me. I’m really okay.”

“I know I don’t have to, but I do. I wanted to clear up everything. I know it’s not an excuse, but I was stressed.” He explains, cheeks slowly turning pink. “There was just a lot happening and then you were there and I don’t know what happened. I really really shouldn’t have yelled. It won’t happen again.”

“I believe you,” you say. “Thank you for apologising. You can go now.”

Maybe it’s a bit harsh as Chan visibly blanches, before his expression is wiped clean.

“Oh, okay.” 

“Sorry,” you say, making sure to soften your voice. “I just. I really do have a lot that I have to finish right now. I appreciate that you came to talk to me, though. I’ll see you later.”

“Right, see you later.” Chan echoes faintly and turns towards the door. After it closes, there’s a long pause before you finally hear his footsteps resume.

—

The rest of the weeks before you leave for Japan seem to somehow simultaneously crawl by and pass in a flash. You’re frustrated by how unproductive you feel like you are at work compared to the amount of things you have to do because you keep getting distracted, but once you’re off, there’s nothing that you want to do. You spend an disconcerting amount of time catching yourself staring at your phone not realising it has already timed out and all you’re looking at is a black screen.

When you confess this to Eunsung, he starts dragging you out for dinner with the rest of the team. It keeps you busy and you have fun in the moment, but every time you get back to the dorms, the emptiness that has been plaguing you creeps back in.

It’s the same today. When you enter your room, there’s no sign of Chan other than the clothes that he was wearing earlier sitting on a pile on his side of the bed. 

It’s no surprise to you, he’s been alternating between being out late at night, either in the studio or working out, or hunched over his laptop with his headphones on. You’ve gotten used to it by now and honestly don’t mind the decreasing number of interactions that you’ve had. On the surface, things are fine between the two of you, but everything is stilted in a way that it wasn’t before. Your relationship, whatever it was prior to that night in Chan's studio, has been strained and you don’t want to do anything to test the breaking point.

You shower quickly and head to the kitchen for a glass of water. When you pass through the living room, Felix is sprawled out on the couch, doing something on his phone. He straightens, legs falling back to the floor when he sees you.

“Hey stranger,” you greet him, instinctively smiling. In the safety of the dorms, with his hair fluffed up to form a dandelion puff around his head, you can’t help but treat Felix with the warm familiarity that you’ve tried to restrain the past few weeks. You had been friends with him way before the mess of your relationship with Chan and you feel guilty every time you see him at the company.

“Y/n! It feels like it’s been so long since I’ve seen you. How have you been?” You make a face at that.

“Work is crazy, you know. I think I’ve been dreaming about planning the tour, it’s basically all I think about these days.” You shrug. “But I can’t complain, I really like doing this and it’s not like you guys are spending the days relaxing. I wasn’t expecting to see you here.” You abandon your task of getting water and settle beside Felix who puts an arm around your shoulders to tug you closer.

“I miss you,” Felix says quietly. “I know that you don't have time to come to our schedules anymore, but I miss having you there.”

“Aw, Felix. I miss you too. You can always come and find me, I’m never going to be far.” You wrap your arms around his waist and rest your head on chest. You don't tell him that it was more a choice by you rather than time constraints that led you to stop attending schedules. Felix is well intentioned, but you know he would immediately confront Chan if he found out that you weren't as 'okay' as you had assured Chan and that would just make things worse. You don't want to be more of a bother than you already are.

“What were you doing on your phone?” you ask after a moment of silence. Felix picks back up his phone and unlocks it. He has to turn it horizontal to properly show you the screen and the motion means that his arms encircle you.

“It’s a new game I’ve been playing,” he explains. “I’m still not that good, but it’s been fun! I thought Hannie would be around to play with me, but I think he’s still at the company.”

“Show me how it works,” you prompt him. You aren’t really interested in mobile games, but are rewarded when his face lights up. He starts by giving a quick tutorial of the game and showing off all the characters he plays as, before continuing on where he had left off.

The steady beat of Felix’s heart combined with the gentle rumble of his commentary and the constant exhaustion that plagues you these days easily lulls you into a semi-conscious state. You’re not quite fully asleep, but only partially aware of what’s going on around you. You keep thinking that you should get up so that Felix isn't stuck on this couch with you, but can't muster up the energy to actually move.

Eventually, you hear the front door open and footsteps pad towards the two of you.

“Is she sleeping?” a voice that isn’t Felix’s whispers.

“Yeah, she must have been pretty tired, hyung. I think she fell asleep almost an hour ago.”

“Thanks for taking care of her, Lix. I’ll bring her back to our room.”

A pair of hands ease under you and shifts your weight from Felix and into the person’s arms. The Charge sparks to life and you can’t help but lean into the comforting buzz, nestling into the warm hold.

It must be Chan, you think blearily. 

You want to protest that you can walk yourself, that you don’t have to be carried back, but the Charge feels so good and so safe that you just relax further. It’s only a short walk down the hall, but the gentle rocking puts you back to sleep before you reach the bed.

—

Trying to balance concert practice, promotional photoshoots, and getting approvals for the next comeback means that it takes Chan an embarrassing amount of time to notice that something’s off.

It starts with the little things.

In between filming for a dance practice video, the members get a short break. Everybody collapses in different parts of the room, only getting up when a staff member enters with a couple trays of drinks. A small crowd forms and Chan waits until everyone else has taken their pick before heading over. He’s disappointed to find that there’s only iced americanos left. When he instead goes to fill his water bottle, he finds Felix already at the fountain.

“You didn’t get a drink?” Chan asks. Felix scrunches up his nose in response.

“They only had coffee today.”

“Don’t they usually have other options? I thought you’ve been getting that fruit tea these days.”

“That’s only when Y/n is organising the order. She always tries to get me things I like.”

“Oh, that’s nice of her.” 

“Come on, hyung, you’re the one that’s her soulmate, shouldn’t you know this? She’s the only one that remembers to get that weird custom protein chocolate smoothie thing that you always drink.” 

“I-” Chan stops to think. It’s true that he had been favouring a strange specialised order from one of the cafes that they usually get drinks from. He had stopped by there one afternoon when he had been in the area, then mentioned it off-handedly when eating lunch with the team and from then on it had appeared at a lot of their schedules. Most of the time, a staff member’s phone gets passed around to order their drinks or they just get served a variety of drinks to pick over, but now that he’s trying to recall, it��s been a while since either of those have happened. 

He hadn’t thought much of it at the time, he’d just been happy to have a drink that he liked. He hadn’t even realised that Y/n was the one behind their personalised orders, but feels off-kilter knowing that he had never thanked her for it.

—

Y/n hasn’t attended Channie’s Room in weeks either. Chan knows that everyone on her team has been scrambling with work related to the international legs of the tour, but even with a heavy workload, Y/n had never missed an episode before. Having her in the room had been a quiet comfort that Chan hadn’t appreciated at the time as much as he should have. 

He misses her.

It doesn’t feel the same. Chan finds himself playing a song and turning slightly to see what Y/n’s reaction is, or reading out a silly pick up line and then feeling his smile drop a little bit when he realises Y/n wasn’t there to hear it.

He’d like to say that he’s playing it off well, but Stays can see it too. It’s almost embarrassing how fast they catch on. The comments that scroll by, most of them too fast for Chan to read, are getting increasingly concerned for him. Where previously they had spammed messages about how happy he seemed, they’re now pointing out that he looks tired, that something is different. After enough people tell him to eat more or get more rest, he just ends the stream, annoyed and guilty at the same time.

—

Another time, Chan’s spending the evening in his studio with Changbin and Jisung, trying to finalise a guide for one of the tracks they’re planning to record.

“Oh hey, I didn’t know noona was close with Minyoung,” Jisung says. When Changbin makes a noise of interest from where he’s sitting beside Chan, Jisung flips around his phone to show them an Instagram story that Minyoung, one of their stylists, had posted. Y/n, Minyoung, Eunsung, and a number of other people are crammed together in a booth at a dimly lit restaurant. They’re all smiling widely.

Chan looks a little too long at the way that Eunsung’s arm is slung around Y/n. Even after Jisung takes his phone back, Chan keeps thinking of how natural it looked, Eunsung at the perfect height so Y/n could rest her head against him, his hand curled around her shoulder, pressing her tightly against his side.

He can't remember the last time he saw Y/n smile like that.

“It makes sense,” Changbin comments. “Y/n hasn’t been spending as much time in the dorms lately, but the tour is coming up so close. I’ve heard that her team has been going out a lot to try to keep up morale and get to know each other before we leave. It’d probably be suspicious if she keeps cancelling."

"I wish we could have team bonding dinners to keep up morale before the tour." Jisung pouts.

"That's what this is!" Changbin gestures towards the spread of empty takeout containers that fill Chan's desk.

"That's the dinner part, where's the bonding, hyung?"

In response, Changbin immediately pulls Jisung into a headlock causing him to shout.

"Don't you feel closer to me now?" Changbin looks up at where Chan is zoned out. "Hyung, don't we look close?"

"Uh, yeah. Super close. Can we just focus on finishing this guide first and leave the bonding for later? I promised that we'd send it for review by tonight."

Contrary to his words, Chan’s thoughts continually wander, straying to the blurry image of Y/n. They get the guide sent off, but Chan's not fully satisfied and he can tell the others agree.

He doesn’t know what's wrong with him.

—

Really, Chan should have known that something is up the evening he finds Felix over at their dorms.

A flare of something curls in his stomach at the sight of Y/n curled up against Felix. When she turns her head, nuzzling his chest, that something becomes a sharp twist of emotion, one that Chan still isn’t able to identify. 

He knows that Felix is strong enough to carry her to bed, but still steps in and scoops her up before he can make an attempt to get up. He lays her down on her side of the bed as gently as he can, but her face still scrunches up when he lets go of her. He cups her cheek until her expression smooths out, then steps back. 

When he returns to the living room, he joins Felix on the couch and they stare ahead at the darkened screen of the TV for a moment. Chan can tell that Felix has something he wants to say.

“Do you think she’s been working too much, hyung?” Felix finally asks in a hushed voice.

“What do you mean?”

“It just seems like she hasn’t been well recently. I don't know if something happened or if she just hasn't been getting enough rest.” 

“It’s probably her job,” Chan says noncommittally. He's definitely not thinking about a late night in his studio a few weeks ago. "Everyone has been busy these days.”

“Hyung,” he says tentatively. “You’ve been working a lot lately too, we’re a bit concerned-”

“What is this, some sort of intervention?” Chan’s not quite sure where the sudden burst of irritation is from, but it seems to be a common occurrence these days. “First Y/n, then I can’t get Stays off my back, and now you? Why is everyone ganging up on me so much?”

“No, it’s-”

“Felix! Just leave it, okay?" Shaking his head in frustration, Chan stalks back to his room.

Sitting heavily on the bed, he buries his face in his hands and lets out a deep breath to calm himself. Luckily he didn't wake Y/n during his conversation with Felix and he takes the time to study her for a moment.

He has to admit that Felix is right, under her eyes are shadows that never used to be there and even in her sleep, she's not fully relaxed. It's just for the next few days, he tells himself. After my deadlines have passed and once the concerts resume then we'll both be less busy and have the time to focus on each other.

In the meantime, he slides under the covers until he's right behind Y/n. He loops his arm around her waist, then pulls her closer, relieved when he sees that the tension in her body drains away.

 previous chapter | masterlist | next chapter | read it on ao3

[alicepao13]

Hudson and Rex S03E03 - Into the Wild

I really like this episode. Then again, I found most S3 episodes very interesting. Also, Charlie!whump.

Second episode with Kendra. Bring back Kendra!

Joe: "It's not every day that we find an ancient mummy". Ancient? Hardly.

I can't with them thinking that a 1700s body would be considered ancient.

Not awkward at all.

Is everyone using Rex as a conduit to tell things about each other?

Kendra: *looking at Charlie* "I miss [Rex's] visits". That's bullshit. She misses her fuck buddy. And Sarah can tell there's something going on, judging by her awkward attempts to change the subject.

"Rex has a mind of his own". I wonder how that goes over with the police complaints.

Every day, opting out of civilization becomes more and more attractive, actually. It's just that the alternative is usually worse.

Charlie explains his new brilliant idea of going to find the camp of survivalists. Sarah has already started worrying.

I know they shuffled the episodes again. There is no way anyone would put a scene of a new house without explaining whose it is and without having a scene inside. Ugh, they're so bad at continuity.

Yay for casual clothes.

See, this is actually good "Visit Newfoundland" promotion. Looking at whoever approved that S6 premiere.

I can almost make out Jesse's email. Also, this is an iPhone.

No! Our beautiful, beautiful car!

Rex is barking out of his mind. Do you mind paying him a bit of attention?

He left a note on the car and moved in deeper. Great.

"Do you know any good jokes?" No, Charlie. Resist the temptation.

"Alright, I got one". Sigh.

Okay, so I never noticed the actual scene where he used a battery to light the fire because that's always where the subtitles are but now I have no subtitles on.

"Charlie's in trouble again, isn't he?" "Ah, shit, here we go again."

And then she insists on going to the search, because what if Charlie needs medical attention? Also, it's Sarah who suggests Kendra. I'm not sure if she's feeling jealous of her at all at this point, probably not, but in any case she's doing what's best for Charlie.

If I'd fallen asleep like that, I don't think I'd be able to get up again.

He gave Rex the last of the water! Oh, and then he drank the remains from his hand. Look, I've never had pets, so I'll just say ew.

Charlie: "Rex, you're going the wrong way, pal". Rex: "No, you are".

See, he told you so.

Is this the dumbest way I've seen a main character get injured? Well, no. But it's pretty high on the list. Also, I think someone in the trailer department noticed that as well, so they edited the trailer to make us think that he falls after getting shot. I mean, you can definitely not show in the trailer that he slips and falls lol

"Are you fucking kidding me right now?!?!"

"Charlie, if you died, I swear to god..."

I'm sure Kendra has already figured out something's going on with Charlie and Sarah. First of all, she knew that Sarah would want to go with her to search for him. I'm assuming there were a lot more of those looks those two give each other. You know, all these things that we don't get to watch.

Rough wakeup call. Here's what you get for making Rex worry.

"It's your dog that saved you." "Yeah, it's an ongoing theme of my life."

This is the nth time someone takes Charlie's gun.

Some girl talk. Or Charlie-talk. Kendra definitely doesn't mind sharing the exact status of the friends-with-benefits situation they had going on after Charlie's divorce, which, judging by the way she says at the start that she hasn't seen him in a while, has already ended. And probably because Charlie has already caught feelings for Sarah.

See? The woods are dangerous.

Poor Sarah, she always has to worry with that man.

"Rex, take the high ground, partner." "No, I'm too cute to get shot."

The plan is to keep him talking until someone saves Charlie.

Flying doggo! And Charlie punching the guy because Sarah had arrived and, well, he has to show off.

"I hope we didn't worry you too much?" "Not at all. I knew it wasn't anything Rex couldn't handle". From their looks, I feel like this is one more case where she's using Rex to refer to Charlie, but I firmly believe that she should actually be talking about Rex.

Stop smiling and start apologizing for worrying the lady.

Some Jesse hero-worship to Charlie.

As I said, they get invited to all the coolest memorials.

And scored some new bling.

[cambriancrew]

Notes on watching your source with your headmates: Doctor Who

Series 1, Episode 1: Rose

Doc: "No we are not starting with Ten, that frim-fram-frap."

-----

Willow: "Wow, Rose wakes up like I do. An absolute mess."

General audience (GA): "You mean you aren't like that all the time?"

-----

GA: "The squeak of the plastic on the mannequins is creepy."

Doc: "I can almost smell them through the screen." "It wasn't just plastic. Burnt plastic."

-----

"Oh sure, just say it right out then, 'Wilson's dead.' Sure I was saving the world and all, but I certainly hadn't any lick of sense to be compassionate. No time, of course, when you're saving the world, I suppose." "'Go on home, have your beans on toast.' I wasn't just out of time, I was out of kindness. Sheesh, no compassion, no compassion whatsoever. Oh and THEN I have a shred of humanoid decency and introduce myself to Rose, just long enough to tell her to run. Great."

-----

"Oh there she is, my lovely TARDIS. Lovely."

-----

"Is this who I am? Rude and not ginger? Well that part started a regen early."

-----

"Wow. She was persistent. No wonder I liked her. Even though I was trying very hard not to."

-----

"Go home. Oh I was trying so hard not to get attached."

-----

"Oh that computer is ancient. Even for you lot."

-----

"'Dad, it's one of your nutters.' Well, rudeness."

-----

"The Doctor has one constant companion." "Who's that? Do I have competition? Oh look at me. Still rude, and not ginger. Though I did have one regen that was."

-----

"No don't go investigate the rubbish bin moving all on its own. Idiot! Yes, still rude. But he WAS being an idiot."

-----

"How does she not realize he's wrong? Micky doesn't look anything like himself. Oh yes, right, Earth idiot."

-----

"Ah, the wonder of first seeing 'Bigger on the inside.' Love it every time."

-----

"Ah, patting the TARDIS. I've always loved her, from the first time I saw her."

Jas: *playful smack*

Doc: "Hey I can love more than one thing!"

Jas: "What am I, a thing too?"

Doc: "Well, yes. You're certainly not an idea or a... oh. Noun. Person, place, thing, idea. That's how you lot conceptualize things, isn't it? Oh alright. Not a thing. A person. You happy?"

-----

*not noticing the ferris wheel* "Well sometimes it seems I am an idiot too. Gallifreyan idiot."

-----

"Oh red glowy thing. That's not good. That's never good."

-----

"'I'm not here to kill it. I've got to give it a chance.' Well, having a backup plan is never a bad thing."

----

Mickey: "Don't go! He's an alien! He's a thing!" Doc: "Okay, okay, I see, I see. I apologize."

-----

Doc: Overall, not a bad introduction. Though I'm a little confused on why it seems like I'd just noticed myself, complaining about the ears and all, when it's also obvious from "the nutters" guy that I'd been around for quite awhile before then.

Quite looking forward to doing this with the next few episodes. I don't think we'll do every episode, just the key ones. But there's a lot of key ones. Oh and next ones we do will include screenshots. Thought about that a bit late for this one.

[walkingstackofbooks]

DS9 5x04 Nor The Battle To the Strong thoughts (I’m re-watching, so beware spoilers for future episodes!) [9 Sept ‘23]

"Aren't you going to take notes?" Oh, Julian. 🤣 I mean, to be fair, Jake is the one who asked to write a report on him, so it's not outrageous for Julian to think Jake might want to listen to him.

Jake's internal monologue is great

"These people need you." That is the way to get Julian to do a thing, how does Jake know how to manipulate Julian so well? (I guess tbf it's a solid shout for manipulating any of these Starfleet types...)

Although, looking at Julian, I don't really think that he is listening to Jake, it seems more as though he's just trying to calculate what the right call here is.

"You're being ridiculous. Why does pregnancy always make men hysterical." "Excuse me. This is not the first baby I've had." "Excuse me. Keiko had Molly." "It's not up to you to tell Kira what she can and cannot do." You tell him, ladies!

When Quark is agreeing with you, you know you're on the wrong side, Miles XD

"That means they'll be home by Thursday. Doesn't give you much time to snoop through Jake's things." Dax is just sometimes so good. Poor Sisko, though, that cannot have been an easy decision.

I love the way this field hospital scene is shot, allowing Bashir to blend straight into the background of the confusion, and leaving the focus on Jake just standing there, completely out of place.

"I was planning to change form midair and become a Tarkalean condor." "Ah, that would have been impressive." You get the impression Sisko is clinging onto any distraction he can in this conversation.

"Humanoid bodies are so fragile." "Yes they are." OHHH, Sisko says that so softly. 😭😭 Bless him. He's so aware Jake may not be okay. 💔💔

"But Jake is 18 years old. Does your father still worry about you?" Awww, Odo <3 my heart that you don't realise parental worry is normal.

Julian, you idiot, how did you think "I'll start with a lateral incision across the thigh joint" was going to make Jake feel?! ... I guess he has been around field medics who have probably been making those sort of dark jokes all day.

oH, he chases after Jake so gently <3 :3

"There are many situations in life that test a person's character. Thankfully, most of them don't involve death and destruction." :3 I love him

"Medical personnel are fair game as far as Klingons are concerned. They'll even kill wounded right in their beds." Every time this sort of thing comes up I can't help but think of the outrage manufactured over Worf "killing civilians" back in his trial episode.

Oh, Jake. This was not the exciting experience you thought you were going to find, is it...

"And now you think bringing me back is going to make everything all right." Oh Jake. *You are not a soldier.* You're an untrained kid. This guy is dying and knows nothing about you. Of course he's judging you more harshly. But it's really not true that your actions were "wrong", you're not meant to be in this situation in the first place.

"If this story has an unhappy ending I would never have forgiven you." <3 Dax and Sisko friendship is always so important to me

"I'm so sorry." "It's alright." "No it's not. I should never have brought you here." Ohhhh these two ❤️❤️❤️ I wish we saw more of them interacting, there's barely any Jake & Julian fanfic 😭 [yes, I could write one, but shhh, I have a long to-do list, okay? 😅]

"I'm a coward." Oh noooooo. Jake. Baby boy. It's okay to be scared.

"Something's eating at you, I can see it." Julian is SO gentle and I cannot, I love him for this just so much 😭

"Leave me alone." "Okay, if that's what you want. But if you want to talk, you know where to find me." Ohhh. Julian looks so stressed -- he doesn't know what he should do to look after Jake, and I'm sure he's not feeling like he's doing the best job.

Oh, Jake. If your dad was here he would have ignored you telling him to leave you alone, wouldn't he? But Julian's not your dad, he's not going to force his way in.

The way Julian is stroking Jake's head as he comes to :333

"I'm proud of you, son." Ahhh, yes, Jake FINALLY gets that hug he's been needing all episode, and is able to accept that praise and smile about it. Ohhh, my heart <3

(Now can Julian get a hug from Sisko, please?)

(Please?)

[saltygilmores]

Thoughts While Watching Gilmore Girls- Season 2, Episode 22 (Last Episode of the Season). "I Can't Get Started" Part 1

This episode may just be the ultimate game of memory roulette, because I remember nothing. Zero. Nada. Zilch. Zippo. except these two things:

I am told this episode involves a Lorelai-Crusty hookup and I have no recollection of that whatsoever. The mind has a way of bleaching itself sometimes. Can't wait to be retraumatized! The episode begins with Sookie playing wedding music choices for her coworkers and everyone falls asleep listening to the depressing songs she picked. Leave my girl Sookie and her emo music alone. She lives in Stars Hollow, of course she can relate to songs about pain, depression and misery.

Emily the Strange, seen on Rory's cast.

My conflicting emotions as I think about how Season 3 brings Jess to the forefront (that's good) but he rarely knows a moment's peace (that's bad) and in the blink of an eye we lose him to the California Wormhole (that's bad) but it also temporarily sidelines Dean (that's good) but it brings Crusty back (that's bad) but there's the debut of Dave Rygalski (that's good) but in the blink of an eye we also lose Dave Rygalski to the California Wormhole (that's bad) then we meet Alex who is cool and also hot (that's good) but then he disappears forever (wormhole?) and Max briefly returns from the California Wormhole (meh?) When Michel complains about the drudgery of wedding preparations, Lorelai reminds him she's in Sookie's wedding party so he has to oversee the entire wedding by himself, which is something he's never done before. Excuse me? Why don't you hire some more staff Lorelai, you fucking cheapskate. (We also learn later on that Sookie's catering her own wedding. WHAT? I know Sookie is a perfectionist when it comes to food but that's fucking bonkers). Rory offers to brainstorm with Lane to come up with wedding songs for Sookie and she agrees to let them do it because letting teenagers pick the music for the most important day of your life is a smart idea. This is where I realized I have no idea what kind of music Rory is actually into except that she has expressed she doesn't like the pop music/boybands of the day, which is fine. I just hope Rory wasn't one of those super annoying kids in school who were always coming up to me saying things like "You know, the Backstreet Boys don't play their own instruments." I was well aware. Anyway, Lane was definitely one of those types, as we see it happen on the show frequently, but as for Rory, that one is maybe up for debate.

Sookie asks Lorelai if she wants to invite Emily and Richard to the wedding. Uhh, may I ask why? Just 5 episodes ago, Emily was meddling in the wedding planning and blew up Sookie's budget and Lorelai had to intervene so she wouldn't go bankrupt. That's about the extent of any significant interaction between the Gilmore Grands and Sookie. After that mess, why would Sookie want her there? Sookie's all "Ah, that ol "almost bankrupted me" thing. She was so thoughtful to help me with the planning! Even though it was nothing more than a passive aggressive scheme to stick it to you for never getting married. She made me realize I love the color pink!" And then she giggles away the deep seated pain that anyone so relentlessly cheerful and forgiving has to be holding deep inside. Something historic just happened: I watched the Intro, instead of skipping it, which is something I haven't done in years. Let it be known I have nothing against the intro nor the song, and they're very nice and heartwarming, but I'm just not an intro girl. But I've been pretty down in the dumps and the theme song is like a warm cup of cocoa. It might behoove me to watch the opening credits once in a while so I know when to expect Dean, Crusty and other creatures from the deep.

More fine work from the Gilmore Girls fake food designer. Looks delish. She's still wearing that fucking quarter on a string, god damn. Rory is pestering Butthead to trade his pancakes for her fruit and egg platter.

You know, sometimes I start writing a joke, then realize it was funny, but it didn't make any sense and I have to scrap it, which makes me sad. Sometimes I don't even notice it after I've already posted and have to do a quick deletion (it just happened with LGD, in fact). Today, you're in for a treat because I'm going to give you one of my bloopers. Rory is incessantly asking Dean for his opinion on the pancakes. I decided she had poisoned them and she was monitoring his reactions, like when his breathing would start to become labored, or if he started to foam at the mouth, or if he would say something like that "huh, these pancakes taste kinda metallic." and then he would keel over. But then I remember they are at Luke's and she didn't cook the pancakes. But she could have sprinkled some rat poison on top of it when he had his back turned. I'm 100% convinced Lindsay had tried unsuccessfully to poison his meatloaf.

Oh no, they traded breakfasts. Eat AROUND the poison sprinkles, Rory. Rory and Buttzilla are observing someone who is repeatedly walking back and forth in front of the diner without coming in. *Sniffs the air* I smell unhealthy boundaries. It must be Lorelai.

I actually forgot that Luke and Lorelai were still "fighting". In fact, I just realized there was no Luke whatsoever in the previous episode. Okay, okay! I plum forgot about Luke completely! Anyway, can we please resolve this nonsense before season 3? How is Lorelai hooking up with Crusty going to end this stalemate?

Ya'll, she really blurted out "Dean don't leave me", not "Don't leave me, guys" or "Rory don't leave me." I CAN’T! I'm dying! Poor Rory, shows where she really ranks on the list of her mother's priorities. Anyways, sucks to suck Lorelai, good luck with solving this fucking mess completely of your own making.

lolbye

That's a wild under-exaggeration for how you acted after that car crash. Just wild.

There is no quicker way to get Lorelai’s goat than to act Pleasant Neutral towards her and not entertain her quirkiness! it is aggravating her to no end that Luke isn’t entertaining her stupid doughnut jokes! Hahahahaha! He isn’t groveling at her feet over her half baked fake bullshit apologies either. Sucks to suck Lore! Luke being so indifferent to Lorelai's bullshit is glorious, no one has ever deserved it more.

Meanwhile, Paris is running for student council president. Her campaign promises include mandatory recycling, clearly gendered bathrooms and gluten free options in the cafeteria (hey, as long as Rory can still order her favorite Chilton lunch, The Prison Special, two slices of white bread with nothing in the middle). After Madeline and Louise poll 150 students in the span of about 1 minute, the results are in: While the People think she would make a competent politican, nobody actually likes her. So she strong arms a very reluctant Rory into becoming her running mate. Paris feels Rory's nice girl image will soften her own. She puts the fear of God into Rory that she will end up going to Connecticut State instead of Harvard if she doesn't take this opportunity to pad her college resume with school politics. I mean, she's not wrong. Rory is still pitifully lacking in extra cirricular activities. Until they showed Rory writing in the audience, I had completely forgotten she was already on the school newspaper because it hasn't been mentioned in ages. And now I just remembered that horrid school newspaper storyline in s3 is approaching. The one with the redheaded mean girl, Francie. Ugh! S3 is going to be such a rollercoaster. Wait, isn't Connecticut State where Dean was considering going to school? Heheh.

Out of context Gilmore Girls.

Hmmm.

You know who else AmyShermanPalladino said this about?

AmyShermanPalladino wrote Paris to adore Rory as much she adores Milo, I'm just saying. Rory is getting her cast off.

Emily Strange again...

SECURITY!!!! No, but what kind of medical office is this where anyone can just barge in to a child’s appointment and be like "it's okay I'm the Dad" and the Dr is like “sure I believe you have a seat”. Not like Crusty is ever around that the doctor would recognize him. He drove down all the way from Boston to watch Rory have her cast cut off but can't be present for anything important? Alright. Anything to get into Lore’s pants I guess.

Yeah. Love is in the air at their child’s medical appointment.

Their nauseating attraction clouded their minds enough that they both resisted the urge to get in one last jab about Jess being the cause of Rory's injury. Miraculous.

Hur hur hur! You're so funny! Drink drain cleaner.

Honestly? They deserve each other. R: “If I become vice president, I'll have to spend my summer at some junior leadership program in Washington."

Oh, you would HATE That.

[number-0-iz]

Live thoughts of Bridgerton

Season 3, episode 1

Colin getting dressed in the carriage lmao

He is definitely better looking but I still don't think he's all that hot. Sorry not sorry. Maybe I'll change my mind.

Ah yes big ass feathers

SIGN LANGUAGE CHARACTER YES.

I love that. I don't speak ASL (also mainly cause English isn't my first language) but it is so cool.

The queen be bored lmao.

Charlotte as fierce as ever.

SINCE WHEN IS ELOISE INVOLVED WITH SEASONAL STYLES?

Me the whole time Fran was walking: don't fall don't fall don't fall

WHAT'S WRONG

Player Colin is...a little weird lma

ANOTHER ONE OF PEN'S SISTER FOUND A HUSBAND OH I'M SO HAPPY FOR HER.

NOW IT'S PEN'S TURN!

Oh shit the sister doesn't seem to like him 😭

Rip aunt Petunia, she seemed cool.

Oh u feel like the truth from last season will come out about the Featheringtons.

ELOISE SEEING PEN ELOISE SEEING PEN

Ugh friendship with Cressida? Eloise?

This is probably why she suddenly keeps up with seasonal styles?

God I hope they didn't change her too much or that she didn't lose herself.

I am not even 15 minutes in.

At least Violet seems to know something is up with Eloise.

"Tender young ladies." 😭

Damn all of the flirting jesus

CRESSIDA'S MOTHER IS SUCH A BITCH

Damn Portia has it all planned out huh

PEN AND COLIN MEET UP OOP

OOH HOW SHARP

I too would take a deep breath like that if I had to share a carriage with Portia

I AM A SUCKER FOR BOWS

"NO! Outside. Where our mother can't see." He says with a grin.

Lmao I love this man.

ELOISE IS READING EMMA

Please don't tell me Eloise has given up on being keen to learn and intellectual and a feminist

Because if she has, I will throw my phone at the wall.

"I lost the battle and I have no appetite for the war. I've joined the winning side."

So you mean to tell me that you have truly given up on your principles Eloise?

I wish Eloise would listen to Pen and they would be friends again.

"She was a very cold lady."

"She is colder now, I'm afraid."

AYE YO WHAT THE FUCK 😭

That was so savage.

Please let Mondrich and his family get a lot of cash as an inheritance.

A TITLE GOR MONDRICH'S SON?!

THIS IS EVEN BETTER 😭

They deserve it

NEWTON COCKBLOCKING KANTHONY LMAO

Aww their hands.

Ah another fantastic ball of Lady Danbury.

Oh Kate looks beautiful!!

PRETTY PEN IN A PRETTY DRESS

Aww Mr. Finch is so proud of his sister in law. Greenest flag.

UGH NOT A CONTESSA

I got distracted by Instagram reels when I went to look for the playlist of classical music covers used in the new season.

OH PEN US SO AWKWARD MY SWEETIE

Oh awkward Eloise

Ugh rude men

KANTHONY DANCE

PEN AND FRAN FRIENDSHIP

Oh Debling seems interesting.

NOT CRESSIDA STANDING ON PEN'S PRETTY DRESS! WHAT A BITCH.

And Eloise tried to apologise and Pen ran away 😭

OH THE SCENE FROM THE PREVIEW

"I overheard you." OOOOH

OH MIGHT THE FEATHERINGTONS LOSE EVERYTHING.

Cressida is a bitch. Eloise should not approve and be angry.

Oh sensitive Cressida? Damn.

How did I only now notice that Kate is left handed lol

COLIN VISITS

"BUT FRIENDS DON'T LOOK AT EACH ITHER THE WAY YOU DO."

Oh no not Penelope's scathing Whistledown letter

This'll be bad

GO MONDRICH FAM

Footman: Lord Kent. *proceeds to bow* welcome to your new home.

The kid: aye yo what the fuck

"I will never forgive her." Oh Colin if only you knew.

Well that was quite something! I really liked this episode if I am being honest! God I already wanna turn back to my season 2 Bridgerton AU with my OC that I made a few years ago but never posted. Am I going to watch episode 2 rn? Yes because I cannot wait. Will I leave yet another long reaction list like this one? Probably not cause I want to get a handle on my phone usage. But maybe another time! Until then!

[bengiyo]

The Eighth Sense Eps 1 & 2 Stray Thoughts

I've been so busy this week that I'm only now finally able to sit down and start this show. I've seen some reactions and gifsets, so I'm excited to begin.

Episode 1

The first two minutes are moody intro into in media res start. Okay, I see the indie film vibes folks called out.

What is up with folks going out to drink with old classmates only to be envious and salty? Goddamn.

Ah, nevermind. They're just being boys.

To think we had made so many strides to get folks to stop smoking only to be back here now.

I'm a fan of the bar owner.

I'm absolutely fascinated by the etiquette rules about drinking soju that come up in these shows all the time.

This drunk guy is so obsessed with Jae Won.

The country boy is so valid for not involving himself in a stranger's drama.

He is also valid for following that same guy the next way at school because he couldn't help but be curious about him.

This poor boy. They need to stop giving him a hard time about directions. He is an artist!

I just don't think Jae Won needs to talk to his ex if he didn't want to, and these guys' meddling isn't fun.

There is intense homosexual energy in the space between these two.

The coach is a little too friendly about the cutie pie thing, but I don't mind it.

I'm with Ji Hyun. He should be allowed to try new things without much explanation.

Well well well. We haven't shared earphones in a while. Welcome Back, old friend.

Episode 2

I am a bit worried that Ji Hyun hasn't disclosed that he can't swim.

Not sure how to read the separate zoom ins on each lead's face in the waking scene on the bus.

Damn, Jae Won. You don't need to be so broken up that you don't get to room with the freshman.

They're supposed to be surfing but everyone looks bundled up. That water is probably cold.

It's interesting how much this show is using its runtime to show mundane things like these two walking together.

The posture in the suit scene was deeply compelling.

I'm so glad Jae Won asked whether this boy could swim before they got into the water properly.

As a fan of Shelter (2007), I'm enjoying the surfing content.

What does Eun Ji know? Why is she so bitter about Jae Won hanging out with Ji Hyun?

Shower scenes where one asks the other way they're shy also never get old for me.

Eun Ji is mean mugging the fuck out of them at the grill.

Everyone seems really intent on who Jae Won may be dating.

Still, this swimming club campfire looks cozy.

Mmm, Jae Won and Eun Ji feel bitter.

Jae Won, my man, I need to understand you next week.

This show is in line with the aesthetics and vibes I enjoy in queer cinema, so I will be watching all of this. I plan to continue Stray Thoughts.

[thessalian]

Thess vs TLOVM S3, Ep 1

I've been so exhausted and fed up this week that I forgot TLOVM was starting today! How remiss of me! So here we go with liveblogging! One episode at least. I may draw this out some.

Oooh. This is new. I mean, I did see the first three minutes or so on YouTube, so it's not a huge surprise, but that level of spycraft is ... at once too well-planned for the "At Dawn, We Plan" Brigade and also just fucking reckless enough for that bunch of yahoos.

Also, pouring one out for Lance Reddick. I knew this was gonna hit different, but ... damn. Is it okay if I say that he's replaced Matt Mercer as my Official Voice of Thordak? 'Cos he totally has, and it's the best memorial I can give him - two of my top villains or at least antagonists (Sylens is still my number one douche-canoe).

Damn. Liam O'Brien vs ... Liam O'Brien. Also, every time I think "Damn, he has range", I kick myself for forgetting his Speak-N-Spell Liam ... thing during that one-shot he did that one time. I mean. Holy shit.

DAAAAAH! I mean, I knew it was coming because I've already seen this bit but DAAAAAAAAAAH!

...Is the mood a bit wrecked when I see Thordak cram his head into a crevice and all I can think is "Themberchaud"?

Now, see, I did not see how he got out of that. Now we are getting into the "What the fuck did you people cook up?!?" territory.

One Day Earlier?!? ASSHOLES! HOW DO YOU HAVE A CLIFFHANGER AT THE START OF AN EPISODE?!?

Fuckmuppets.

...Okay, I knew Raishan sounded familiar. Now, keep in mind that Atlantis: The Last Empire was the last movie I saw before I landed in a psychiatric hospital because of an ongoing nervous breakdown finally hitting crisis point, and never watched it again, so it says a lot about me that I can find the voice of Princess Kida familiar.

...VIOLENT ELF FEMALE VOICE FOR DRAGON AGE: ORIGINS?!? BWAAAAAAHAHAHAHA!

Okay, get OFF IMDB, Thess.

Yeah, I knew we were getting the Plate of the Dawnmartyr. We'd have to, given the trailers about the hells.

...Wait. Putting some of the snippets together ... and given that they have to streamline stuff for a series like this ... are they going to combine that trip to the hells for the Plate of the Dawnmartyr with throwing Yenk at Vorugal?!?

(No, I literally don't know; I'm kind of calling it here, though.)

Also ... would you call that spell a series of Silent Images? If so ... cool.

OMG GILMORE.

Grand Poobah de MAYONNAISE?!?

Ah, I missed this side of Pike in the first couple of seasons.

...Not sure if that was the dumbest possible thing Grog could have possibly said, or the only thing that could have broken the tension. ...Porque no los dos?

N'awwwwwww. I mean, I know it's a shame that some of this stuff has to be ... rushed, a little? But they're doing it pretty damn well!

[snipped because character limit]

Okay, get OFF the rage at the narrow-minded bullshittery of reviewers, Thess.

...Oh. Ooooooooh. So instead of having Keyleth cast Foresight on him before that whole thing with Thar Amphala, it's now ... something he gets from the Raven Queen? That makes sense.

Also ... I'm taking it that no one's going to flag up that if Keyleth goes Archdruid, of fucking course she's going to outlive the entire rest of the party! Chill, Vax!

You guys are DORKS.

"Well, one can certainly--" WHO WROTE THIS?!?

.........Sam Riegel was one of them. Because of fucking course he was. You are not a gnome, Sam, nor are you specifically a goblin. What you are is a troll.

.........Aaaaaaand Travis Willingham is the other. I wonder if he wrote any of the Vex/Percy stuff, given he was always the captain of the good ship Perc'halia.

...Trinket, really?!?

Okay, that was Matt, doing a little Sun-Tree whisper. Not "Sun Tree; A-okay!", but I'll take it.

...I feel a Leverage "explaining how Vax got out of that mess" moment coming on. Also ... it's nice to see Gilmore do the charm without quite the innuendo.

On the list of "Things To Never Say Before A Mission", Grog? "What could possibly go wrong?" is right at the top, so shut up.

...Okay, not quite what I was thinking, but ... oh gods, Gilmore, you adorable glorious narcissist! (Okay, part-time narcissist.)

Yeaaaaaah, see, I would have asked Gilmore for a Scroll of Dimension Door, personally. Or maybe Clairvoyance? Anyway, this is more exciting.

Yeah. No. So glad Lance Reddick got this done before he passed. I have chills. May you live as long as your name is spoken, sir.

...I ... literally can't praise Reddick enough. Holy shit.

Ooooooooooh. Marquet is so pretty!

...Given that "high noon" is not usually that much of a D&D phrase, and thinking of who Matt Mercer voice-acts with a ... certain phrase? I'mma say that's Sam being a troll again.

Oh, that's a great way to get Ripley back into it. ...Wait, does this mean she already has Cabal's Ruin? .........Wait, does this mean she kept Cabal's Ruin from Umbrasyl?!?

So ... gunshots. And ... Percy's the only one in evidence with a weapon of that type. And ... they just ran in. Hey, Percy, remember when you used Bad News' scope as a telescope? And when Pike followed Vax with Clairvoyance? WHY DIDN'T YOU DO THAT?!?

No no no Percy DON'T HAVE THE GUN OUT WHEN--

She does have Cabal's Ruin.

Also ... oh FUCK.

...So it's not Percy's turn to have the brain cell today. Okay.

And, I mean, it's almost never Grog's turn to have the brain cell. He is very generous with the brain cell.

STOP DEMONSTRATING THAT YOU HAVE THE KIND OF WEAPON THAT KILLED ALL THOSE PEOPLE, PERCY! I DON'T REMEMBER INT BEING YOUR DUMP STAT!!!!!

...Okay, so INT is Percy's dump stat just for today, then.

...Wait. Who does have Vox Machina's collective brain cell today? Please tell me it's not Scanlan.

Percy would you--?!? Ooooooh fuck.

Oh. Okay. Cabal's Ruin in action is the coolest fucking thing...

Also I don't remember their trip to Marquet being this--

Hi, Matt!

"Does ... she ... spice?" "...Dude." Good one, Scanlan.

I do love the banter between these two--

Ooooh. As a televisual reveal of Orthax and Ripley's whole deal, that is next level awesome.

Oh. Oh. Oh so are we ... not having the fight on the tit-crevasses? We're doing this right here?

"In Memoriam - Lance Reddick" ...Yep.

But at the same time ... I DO NOT HAVE ROOM FOR SAD; FIRST YOU GAVE ME YIKES AND THEN GAVE ME A CLIFFHANGER SO GO FUCK YOURSELF.

(Not you, Mr Reddick; rest in power, and on your laurels because you were badass.)

Okay, so who the fuck is voicing Anna Ripley?

Kelly who? (Kelly Hu, that's who, but-- Sorry; I'll see myself out.)

Lady Deathstrike?!? VISAS MARR?!? Okay that's awesome.

I'm sorry, but Scanlan jazzy flight singing is not what I need right now. Though I guess it kind of drives home the "We are cliffhanging you right here; cope".

Right. I could watch another episode, but ... no. No, I have to work tomorrow and that means I need to wind down, and--

Wait. Did they say Draconia?!? Did Orion Acaba let them use that?!? Oh, I don't even want to think about that level of negotiation, after everything.

[oleander-nin]

Okay continuation now lmao

"How'd you find it wasn't my name? Did you look it up or smth? I'm just curious lol."

Nope! Just heard people (and yourself) call you Ollie and never once call you Oleander, so I just assumed. Also part of it is because I didn't know Oleander was an actual name until now. Damn that is a sick name.

"Uhhhhh Mikey would keep a snake if he could. He seems like a snake guy to me."

WAIT I can see that! I don't think he'd like feeding them live mice or anything though, he'd probably get one with a different diet.

I may be thinking a little too hard here but he would ALSO get one that's low maintenance. Or at least he should. In that scrapped episode "T-hex" splinter alludes to Mikey having electronic pets before and I remember hearing SOMEWHERE that Mikey always ends up forgetting to take care of them after the initial excitement dies down? I don't remember where I heard that or if it was another person just theorizing but either way that seems in character lol.

WAIT ANALYSIS TIME maybe Mikey wouldn't like the idea of a super low maintenance pet? Because maybe if he DID have to pay attention to caring for one it would give him a sense of purpose and responsibility that he feels robbed of being so babied all the time. I think he'd be a little sick of being too taken care of all the time and maybe he'd want to provide that for a pet to even that out and make him feel independent. (even if he's bad at it. He really doesn't mean to be).

Or maybe I'm projecting. Idk I'm always nervous that maybe my "analysis" for characters is entirely wrong but WHATEVER I'm anon so I fear nothing (lying)

"Twoal Donnie is into botany, actually! He grows all the flowers he sends. I've had it planned like this for a long time lol, and he'll show off his garden a lot in later chapters(once I get to writing them-)"

YESS I KNEW IT >:D MAN I WANT HIM TO RAMBLE PROUDLY ABOUT HIS GARDEN TO MC SO BADLY <3

Imagining MC looking over everything and thinking: "Hey this guy grows a lot of the same flowers that I happen to receive from Von Ryan... Hm... Eh it's probably a coincidence, they're popular flowers."

"THANK YOU FOR NOTICING THE FLOWER THING. I think you're the first person on Tumblr to point it out so far and I'm giddy. When I re-write it for the final time once I finish this draft, I'm gonna try and integrate more flowers."

OF COURSE I NOTICED THE FLOWER THING <33 I WAS SHOCKED NO ONE ELSE HAD

I was checking the notes like "Anyone else seeing this?? No?? Okay well I'M going to be crazy about it then." I was pulling up Google to search all the flower meanings chapter by chapter and would freak out a little every time hdjdjshsj

Sorry for long asks again. These are always longer than I want them to be lmao. Have a nice day Ollie! I am sending you good vibes. You have no choice. There is no escape from them <3

- ☄️

Ah, that makes sense lol. I think I've only had two people ever call me Oleander on the server.

Ooo, I like your analysis! I forgot snakes were high-maintenance pets. If I'm honest, I just liked the mental image of Mikey laying on the floor w/ a snake coiled on his back. I agree w/ the 'he'd like taking care of something for once' idea though.

heheh this is making me want to finish this draft of TWOAL so y'all can see what I have planned.

Yeah, I think only Wattpad noticed the flowers so far. Someone commented what the flowers mean on every chapter, and it's been great fun watching them dissect it lol. Very glad to hear you caught it too!

Long asks are completely fine! I really don't mind, it just took me a while to answer this once because I got a bit busy. Thanks for the good vibes, I needed them. Have a swell day, and I hope yesterday was good to you. Thank you for the ask!

[servenas-inner-fangirl]

Liveblogging Black Sails 2x10

So now what, is Vane gonna storm Georgetown and rescue Flint personally? I would love to see his face. And then there's the matter of the dead crewmembers to talk about...

Also I love that the boys are getting along now, but who is gonna rescue Eleanor??

Still can't believe Miranda was killed simply for yelling.

Also did nobody notice the pirate ship in the harbor, the one they were supposedly so carefully watching, being attacked by other pirates?

God, I'm not ready for this episode.

Really enjoying Abigail's silent fury though. The more I see of her, the more I love this girl.

So that's the plan? Leave Flint's men behind with all of Vane's that disagree with the plan? Oh my god, that is never going to work.

But I gotta say, I love this new "We're all in this together" Vane. But then, he was half right all along - Flint's plan to reconcile with England failed (through no fault of his own). But Flint was also right - war with England is inevitable and they can't survive unless things change.

Also the fact that Miranda, who always tried to convince Flint to re-join civilisation, was the one that, in the end, couldn't stomach what it would take. God, I've been thinking about this way too much.

Vane even still has the blood of Flint's crew on his shirt. Yeah, this is going to go over well.

Flint manages to look done with everyone even while heading to his own execution, that is a skill.

Ugh, Lord Ashe trying to make himself feel better. I hope somebody kills him.

A CONFESSION? You've got to be kidding me.

Flint's words are as sharp as knifes here, though.

God, his face as they defile Miranda's body. Is that the first time we see him close to tears, if only for a moment, before it's replaced by anger?

Eleanor's disappearance is gonna destabilize Nassau quite a bit. They're celebrating now, but this could be a problem later...

Also how exactly are Vane and his men gonna sneak into the square? There hardly is a man who looks more like a pirate...

First time we see Anne on a ship. Love her hair blowing in the wind <3

Her conversation with Jack reminds me of what Eleanor (or dream!Eleanor rather) said to Vane: That next to him, she would always just have been a woman. But they still manage to be partners.

Oh no, Silver's co-conspirator, here to cause trouble again...

Awww, Silver is finally making friends! Or something.

And here we go, people are beating each other's heads in, to the surprise of absolutely no one. On the other hand - smart of Vane to leave behind the men he couldn't trust, because they're expendable to him.

Okay, that was over quickly. Let's see what still happens...

I don't think Lord Ashe can be happy that Flint is interrogated so publically. Some nasty things he could say...

"Everybody is a monster to someone." <3

That is the plan?? Okaaaay?

Awww, he came to defend him. <3 He couldn't look like more of a pirate if he tried though, for real, at least clean up the blood!

Ah yes, Abigail's diary!! I had forgotten about that. Now they have a problem.

Ugh, they've really never heard of true justice, have they? It's disgusting.

Aww, Max buying Eleanor's place, maybe in part because she still cares for her?

Hm, the Silver of S1 might have done this thing, but I have a feeling this Silver won't.

Oh fuck, is this how Silver loses his leg? Because he stays loyal to Flint??

Hahaha, Flint's and Vane's conversation during the trial. Maybe now they can finally talk some shit out.

"Figured if anybody makes a trophy out of you, really ought to be me." Awww, the beginning of a wonderful friendship??

Haha, Flint is so smart, of course he doesn't believe that's the whole plan. (And that's kind of reassuring.)

Ugh, seeing those two united with a common goal, however temporary it might be, really is the best thing ever. I'm about to vibrate off the couch from excitement.

Hahaha, Vane loves giving rousing speeches, and finally he has a receptive audience, must be a dream come true.

Even shackled these two are still so dangerous, I love it.

YES, justice for Miranda!!

Oh Silver, you smart, smart man, I could kiss you.

Nice, rescuing some slaves along the way (or at least giving them a fighting chance).

Ugh, the Man o'War appearing from the smoke and firing, what a beautiful picture.

Yes, Flint freeing the rest of Vane's crew. ;_; (Speaking of which, where are the men that rappelled down from the city wall? Did any of them make it?)

Vane might not like Flint, but he does respect him. That satisfied little smile when Flint anounces that he will destroy Georgetown... he really does value strength in other people, doesn't he?

Silver really has become a part of this crew. Who would have thought... But it must be pretty scary for someone like him to have to rely on other people for help.

The Man O'War firing on the defenseless city like a giant angel of death... what a picture.

I hope Abigail is safe, though.

Aww, they actually made Silver quartermaster! <3

But Flint doesn't seem too concerned about Eleanor's arrest. I wonder how Vane took that one.

Noo, Silver still lying to Flint. But then, what else is he supposed to say...

Goddamn, can nobody ever tell the truth in this show? But they found the gold?? And the walrus?? And the gold??!!

Holy SHIT that is a lot of gold.

[heartofstanding]

Rewatching old favourite crime dramas...

I just finished rewatching Vera up to Series 9, am in the middle of a rewatch of Death in Paradise and have started rewatching Wallander as well and am having some thoughts so I'd thought I'd write a post instead of just stewing in these thoughts.

Vera

I love her, your honour.

I love Vera, I love the location and how it's so beautifully shot, I love the slightly gothic edge to the mysteries. Most memorable episodes for me are "The Crow Trap" and "The Deer Hunters". It holds up really well too - sometimes I'll rewatch a crime drama that I once loved and find myself getting increasingly intolerant of the way it deploys certain tropes, like the tortured brooding lead detective with anger issues and/or a tragic backstory or "internal investigations are bad actually" or "it's fine for the lead detective to lose his temper and almost murder someone" which spoiled Waking the Dead and The Inspector Lynley Mysteries for me (the latter in the final seasons, mostly). Vera lacks most of that kind of drama. Vera is, in a way, a tortured, brooding detective but it never takes over the story.

One thing I did pick up on is that while I don't really have any preference for Aiden or Joe as Vera's offsider, I do miss the way that Joe's character opened up different storylines. We don't get nearly as much about Aiden's family and home life as we do about Joe's, and we got more about Vera's past and private life with Joe, like the subplots about her half-sister and her angina. I do feel cheated that Joe's exit happened off-screen, between series, but apparently he's coming back in Series 13?

(n.b. I finished at Series 9 because I don't have Series 10 on DVD, I started Series 11 but it was a bit too fresh in my mind and Series 12 isn't out on DVD yet.)

-

Death In Paradise

This isn't the first rewatch of the show I've done (the early seasons I've rewatched multiple times, they're very familiar and I can remember whodunnit) but I haven't watched any of the newer seasons since Series 8, except for a couple of episodes (I watched the one with Sam West and the one where Camille came back). I'm halfway through Series 9 at the moment so officially this is no longer a rewatch but a first-time watch.

It's interesting to see how my opinions have changed. I still think the show was strongest in relation to its core concept in Series 1 and 2. You can really tell the way they were planning the show to unfold had they managed to hold onto Ben Miller as Richard and Sara Martins as Camille, and I do really like that version of the show. But they didn't and the show had to change and that's fine. I used to be very fond of Humphrey but I found him painful in the rewatch - he hits my second-hand embarrassment squick much too hard and his unrequited love for Camille was... ah, not good? I was glad to see him go, tbh. Perhaps because of that, I appreciated Jack a whole lot more - I previously felt he didn't really have much of a character beyond "rambling Irishman" but that is really unfair. I just watched his last episode and I'm very sad to see him - I also felt his ending felt a bit... contrary to the character and the way he threw himself into island life, becoming part of the community in a way neither Richard and Humphrey never did. Neville seems a bit of a return to Richard, in that he doesn't want to be on the island, except by making him have so many medical issues, it really feels like that yeah, he really shouldn't be there.

-

Have been pondering how awesome it'd be if the next Death in Paradise detective is in the model of Vera.

-

Wallander

I needed something to watch in the space where I normally watched Vera and I remembered how I was going to try and watch some things in Swedish in effort to help myself learn Swedish better (I'm doing the Duolingo course, it's not going well), and well, this isn't in Swedish but it's set in Sweden so it might just do for now. I went... slightly insane* over it in my first and only watch but I thought I was safe now.

Yeah, well that happened again.

The thing I really like about it is Tom Hiddleston's face the way in which it spends a fair amount time of the affects of coming face-to-face with violent, brutal crime. How intensely Wallander feels everything, how involved he gets, and how all of that just means he's held at a remove from his family, friends and co-workers. He has this remarkable empathy that keeps him cut off from them.

It's also beautifully shot and I'm obsessed with the title credits.

Parts of it hold up fairly well - I feel "Faceless Killers" is still very pertinent to today, though I suspect there would a bit less... "both sidesing" within the main cast. Parts of it do not hold up well, like "One Step Behind" which, uh, is kinda extremely transphobic in a way that does not refute the transphobia.

The language and accent choices throw me occasionally in this rewatch. I think what they ended up going for is the translation trope/convention where the characters are not actually speaking English but are actually speaking Swedish, we just hear them in English, and a similar logic applies with the British vs. Swedish accents. When we see text, it's in Swedish, not English, which tends to confirm my hypothesis. Given the unlikelihood of the BBC doing the series in Swedish and the perils of getting the cast to put on an accent (no one wants to accidentally invoke the Swedish Chef in a brooding crime drama), I think this "they're speaking Swedish, we just hear it as English" thing works pretty well. But there still moments where it pulls me out of the story because the dialogue sounds so terribly British.

Random note: the cast of the first episode is like, full of pretty damn famous people? Obviously, there's Kenneth Branagh and a pre-Loki Tom Hiddleston as series regulars. Plus there's Nicholas Hoult and Rebecca Ferguson in guest roles. There's also a lot of people who are the sort of people you know for turning up in British TV shows, like Sarah Smart and Sophie Stanton (who, most memorably for me, was Falstaff and Caliban in the Donmar Warehouse's Henry IV and The Tempest).

Also, this reflection from when I first watched the show is still true. I thought I was over my Hiddleston phase but he's so fucking pretty in this show. It's distracting. It's literally sir, sir, sir, I am trying to watch Kenneth Branagh have a mental breakdown while solving crime in Sweden here. Take your cheekbones and go somewhere else.

Which he does at the end of Series 2 and then I miss him. Obviously, it doesn't impact the series that much - I enjoyed Series 3 and 4, his character isn't important to the story and isn't that interesting. But I liked the dynamics of the team and I dislike losing that (we also lose Lisa at the same time, and Ann-Britt only sticks around for a bit longer before she's gone too). I'm sad we lose that. I'm also a depraved whump lover and frankly think it was a wasted opportunity. Send Magnus off horribly (as Ann-Britt and Svedberg were sent off) and let Wallander writhe and wallow around in the guilt and grief. Also, I am completely shallow and didn't really want Hiddleston to take his cheekbones and go.

* I, uh, may have written an 87k word thing that's 3/4 whumpy fanfic and 1/4 origfic because it was November and I was doing NaNoWriMo and I was too hyped up to research and too scared to commit fully to the fanfic. I've reread and I feel like it holds up ok. I think the Kurt voice is good, as is the "gets too invested without being able to show it" thing. I am experiencing the urge to turn it into proper fanfic. I need to see how S2 ends and S3 begins but it could even work well as a "and that's where Magnus went" fic. But I don't think there's a fandom for the show outside of the migratory Hiddleston smut fandom.

-

That last point is one of those things with British crime dramas. It's quite common for some of the regular cast to leave between series and you might get a throwaway line about why they're no longer there but there's no proper send-off, no real resolution for the character, and sometimes there's no explanation. It happened in Vera, Death in Paradise, Wallander, Waking the Dead, and probably more than I just can't think of. I understand why it happens but it does make for frustrating storytelling.

The most egregious is Joe leaving Vera - he was the most important character after her! We were invested in his relationship with his family! The relationship between him and Vera was so paramount to the series! And he just disappears between series and his departure explained in a line about a "big promotion". Sure, this ties up one of the parts of his storyline quickly but there's no scene to say goodbye to him, no sense of closure. He's just gone.

-

Both Vera and Wallander are based on novels by Ann Cleeves and Henning Mankell. I've read a few novels of both series (and Cleeves's Shetland series) and I have to say... I feel the TV series really elevate them. With Wallander, maybe it's a case of a bad translation or something else but it seemed to lack something - perhaps the prose felt too simplistic or too blunt? With Cleeves, I think it's a case of has all the right elements, just doesn't have the ability to take it to the next level... I find I enjoy her novels more when I haven't seen their TV adaptation or are significantly different, but they're still not novels that I have to read. I wish the Shetland series had stuck with adapting Cleeves' novels because I'm obsessed with their first/second series (it was released as one series in Australia) which were based on the Cleeves novels, and I feel like the Shetland novels that weren't adapted would make excellent TV.

There are also four Death In Paradise spin-off novels that feature Richard - I've only read two of them and only really remember the first, which was OK - not great, not as fun as the show but still fun. It's nice to get more Richard but it comes with a trade off: Camille, Dwayne and Fidel play much, much, much smaller roles than they do in the TV series.

[history-detective]

BlackStar ~Theater Starless translation

Season 1 – Episode 8:

Chapter 3 – (A) Side stories

A-4 = Push forward on that path

(Sin, Mokuren, MC)

MC - Hello~.

Sin- .....You came.

MC- He....hello.

MC- (How powerful.....!)

MC- Excuse me, is it okay if I take a tour today? There is a rehearsal for W today, right?

Sin- If you have a wish, make it come true with your own hands. I don't think there is anything worth watching though.

MC - Eh, ah, um, thank you very much.

Sin- Are you worried about Kokuyou and Mokuren? I've heard you have been asked to judge them.

MC - Yes......but it's difficult for me to decide who wins and who loses on stage.

Sin-......Hmmmm. Some say there are only two paths in life.

MC - Two paths... do you mean like left and right?

Sin- What is right to you?

MC- Oh the right, the right well....it's hard to explain.

Mokuren- Oh, Sin seems to like you. A conversation is being established.

MC - I'm grateful for that.....but I don't know if [the conversation] is established.

Sin- Mokuren, maybe you are coming from after your lesson?

Mokuren- Ah, well, I jumped into the dance lesson. I wanted to have barre lessons with people.

Sin- Do you feel better?

Mokuren- Probably, I was starting to develop some strange habits, but I was able to correct them.

MC - Barre lessons? Do you do that with [other] people?

Mokuren- Of course, one person is fine, but if someone else is there, you can get advice.

Mokuren- Because there are other people doing the same thing, it can be compared in the mirror.

Mokuren- How will people see me, and how will my dance be recieved?

Mokuren- A proper barre lesson will correct those assumptions.

Mokuren- Besides, it's good for clearing your mind.

MC - Barre lessons are fun, aren't they? That's good.

Mokuren- ....Maybe so. The basics made me belief in my dance.

Sin- A tree with rotten roots has no choice but to fall.

Sin- When Kei first came to 'Starless', he also forced Team W to 'redo the basics'.

Mokuren- It's just a slight increase [difference]. In the end, W hasn't changed its methods.

Sin- Do you want to change?

Mokuren- Maybe....what about you, Sin?

Sin- I haven't decided yet, but there are some things that I must protect.

MC - (Things to protect? Sin really is too mysterious).

Mokuren- What is it that you want to protect?

Sin- It's not clear.

Mokuren- That's just like you. You live in the clouds.

Sin- The one who eats the haze is the hermit. They have no desire at all.

Mokuren- Hah, that seems boring. Dance is a bundle of desire.

Sin- That is why you cannot be shaken. I have to learn from you too.

Mokuren- You from me?

Sin- It is precisely because I get lost that Ineed interdisciplinary studies.

Mokuren- Hmmm... I'll change my clothes. Let's practice together.

Sin- Do you hate studying?

Mokuren- I don't mind, I can explain to you which muscles are under stress while dancing.

Sin- I have never doubted your knowledge regarding dance.

Mokuren- Thank you

Sin- ....Mokuren, change is not a sin.

Mokuren- ......I've never thought about that.

Sin- Which one have you never thought about? Some people say that there are only two paths in life.

Mokuren- There is only one road. My only path is to dance.

To be continued...

A-4 = After story = Face yourself

(Qu, Mokuren, Yakou)

Qu- Hey, Mokuren, are you up already?

Qu- Lately you've been rushing home a lot. You used to go the lesson hall before.

Mokuren- I've been making a reservation for a barre lesson. I plan on continuing with that for a while.

Qu- Barre lesson? Why not go to another lesson venue?

Mokuren-Ah, well then, I'm going ahead.

Qu- .....Mokuren.

Yakou- Hey has Mokuren returned? There was a gift of donuts.

Qu- Yea, that often happens.

END.

A-5 = Don't look away

(Mokuren, Mizuki, Sinju)

Sinju- Ah, Mokuren, good morning.

Mokuren- Oh, good morning. Mizuki, it's also your shift? Don't slack off.

Mizuki- What? Are you complaining again?

Sinju- Cut it out Mizuki. Why are you arguing with Mokuren?

Mizuki- This guy keeps complaining about me.

Mokuren- Because I don't like you.

Sinju- What don't you like about him?

Mokuren-.....Did you not hear about it?

Sinju- Eh? .....Ah! Is it that? The stage jack, the other day!

Sinju- Ah, it doesn't bother me anymore. I wonder if Maica feels the same.

Mokuren- Hmm. That's quite lenient [of you].

Mizuki- You're too picky about it, moron.

Mokuren- I'm angry that you put it like that.

Mizuki- I left P and started having fun. Don't mess with me.

Mokuren- You really didn't like P?

Sinju- Mokuren, stop it.

Mizuki- I really hated Rindou.

Sinju- Mizuki, you stop it too.

Mokuren- I understand that you hated him but why did you stage jack?

Mizuki- Oh yeah, that's my bad.

Mokuren- No, I just think it was pathetic.

Mizuki- What!?

Sinju- STOP IT!

Mizuki- Shinju.....

Sinju- You're wrong, Mizuki. You didn't do it because you hated him.

Mokuren- What are you talking about, Sinju?

Sinju- You stage jacked because you had to.

Mizuki- At that time, Mizuki needed a stage. It's Team B's stage, not Team P's.

Sinju- I think you were in the wrong, but....I think it was so-so

Mizuki- Sinju....

Sinju- I don't understand why Mizuki hates Rindou so much.

Mokuren- I understand.

Mizuki- Why do you say you understand?

Mokuren- Because the top of W is Kokuyou.

Sinju- Does that mean that Mokuren also hates Kokuyou?

Mokuren- Don't compare me with Mizuki....but, I can't say that it's different.

Mokuren- I just don't want to give up in terms of performing. Mizuki with Rindou and myself with Kokuyou.

Mizuki- Of course, I don't even have nail scum anymore.

Mokuren- That I understand.

Mizuki- Then why did you say that earlier?

Mokuren- Because I hated it.

Mokuren- The way you suddenly took the stage. The way you didn't stand on the same playing field as your opponent.

Mokuren- You ran away from Rindou, without directly confronting him.

Mizuki- Shut up!

Mokuren- There will be someone who understands you. That's why Team B was formed.

Mokuren- That has nothing to do with me. You just stabbed him in the back.

Mokuren- Rindou allowed it and now Team B are here.

Sinju- Mokuren....

Mokuren- Rindou accomplished it. Not you.

Mizuki- Shut up! Shut up!

Mokuren- Well none of matters to me.

To be continued....

DISCLAIMER – This is not an accurate translation! Please do not steal. Please let me know of any corrections and what I translated wrong- I may have just written what I think works best, but if you think otherwise, let me know. :)

Wow what a long translation~ Thanks for reading!

[mdhwrites]

Reccomendations for cartoons to watch include: Gravity Falls, Adventure Time, Regular Show, the later seasons of MLP Friendship is Magic (for the sake of completing it and being able to properly evaluate the show), Steven Universe, DuckTales 2017, OK KO, Big City Greens, Star vs the Forces of Evil, Moon Girl and Devil Dinosaur, Kim Possible, Hilda, Helluva Boss, Scooby Doo Mystery Incorporated, She Ra 2018, and the Ben 10 franchise.

I actually still have another ask that is mostly this same list but I think Hilda and Helluva Boss are new. Mostly responding because something I find interesting about myself given how ruthless I can be with TOH is that, well...

I probably will never truly be able to be some big reviewer because when I start disliking something, I drop it. That's actually the big reason I'm responding is because there is NO WAY I am watching the like 4+ seasons of MLP:FiM that I didn't watch because I just can't engage with stuff I dislike. I find no joy in it and while I can rant for a couple episodes, it just loses my interest.

I never seek things out because I think I'll dislike them. I just don't think life is enjoyable that way. It's why I have no plans to return to Helluva Boss. I absolutely believe people would potentially send me asks about it with how polarizing it is but I got to the episode when Moxie and Blitzo are interrogated, went "Ah, I see, the two characters I hate the most and don't even find funny (Stolas and Blitzo) are the actual main characters and the pilot was potentially kind of a lie for what the real focus of the show is. I'm out." And I haven't watched an episode since. My brain struggles to click with media after all so why would I bother with media I actively know I dislike already?

I'll comment on a couple others that I have at least had experience with on the list in a minute but since Amphibia, I've watched the first season of Craig of the Creek and think that show is just AMAZING. There's at least one episode I keep wanting to do a blog on just because it exemplifies how much the show understands the wonder of fantasy and childhood without actually being fantastical. I've also seen S1 of SpyxFamily and some of S2 but right now the only streaming service I have consistent access to is Hulu (the Disney+ I was borrowing cancelled theirs to swap to Hulu) and they only have S1 dubbed of SpyxFamily.

I'm hoping to sometime soon actually watch Over the Garden Wall finally and just have been kind of a mess as of late as for why I haven't yet. I've heard only good things, and shockingly few spoilers, and it's about time I gave it a proper shot.

ANYWAYS:

Steven Universe: Watched the first episode and only really liked Greg so just didn't bother watching more. Steven was fine but I actively hated all three of the gems because of how brain dead they were in both segments of the episode. As far as pilots go, I think SU might genuinely have one of the worst I've ever seen for convincing you to like a main cast.

Gravity Falls: I rewatched the first episode recently and went "This is oooookay." Something about Dipper's VA just bothers me. Not like they're doing a bad job but that it falls into an uncanny valley my brain doesn't love. I really wish I could better explain why that show refuses to properly click for me.

Regular Show: I forget why but I've seen a few episodes. It's not bad but I don't think it's really for me. I find Rigby and Mordecai annoying more than anything else. Not awful but I think without it feeling like they're actually meant to be learning something, they fall into the trap Randy and Howard from Randy Cunningham fell into eventually for me where I was like "Okay, assholes can be fun for a while but if that's all you're ever going to be, I don't care."

Adventure Time: I have seen as many episodes where Fiona and Cake show up in that show than I have Finn and Jake. XD I have genuinely liked what I've seen and just for some reason never sought it out. Maybe someday.

Star Vs: I need to give S2 a chance but MAN when I got told they break up Marco and Jackie for NO REASON I lost a lot of interest in the show. I like Marco more than Star, and I've only seen S1, and thought Marco and Jackie's relationship was genuinely really nice and kind of unique. Also knowing it's most people's cartoon punching bag doesn't exactly fill me with enthusiasm for it.

Kim Possible: I remember rewatching the pilot a couple years ago and being shocked by how much I didn't care for Kim. I think the fact that Bonnie is the only one who gives her shit but she's actually just genuinely amazing at everything and liked by most make her just not compelling to me which is a shame because I have REALLY fond memories of the show. I'd probably commit to a rewatch of Danny Phantom first though since it has been just as long since I watched that.

(Weird fact: I was looking at Hulu's unfortunately limited amount of cartoons and saw they had Kick Buttowski of all things which is WILD to me.)

She-Ra: I've seen literally one episode, thought it was good, and definitely is one of the ones I keep telling myself to watch because everything about it seems like it'd be up my alley. These are also my thoughts on Voltron though with how much... less divisive that last season of Voltron is, it's definitely below watching Princesses of Power.

Ben 10: Loved the original series as a kid, tried the first two spin offs that came out and didn't really jive with either but I thought Julie, the tennis girl Ben gets with, was super cute. I know a friend who would LOVE to see me get into Ben 10 and do some reviews of it.

And just as an anime shout out, a part of me is still tempted to give Little Witch Academia another try. Not only is it just an obvious next show for me to watch but it's one I REALLY want to like because I like a lot about it... I just absolutely despise Akko from the like four episodes I watched a good number of years ago now. I thought almost all of the supporting characters were great though.

Just... Consider this my weird, rambly blog late at night about cartoons and the fact that I do wish I engaged with media better. One of the worst elements of it is that I don't engage well with scripted content well if my brain isn't already in an alright place. Like I don't go to television for distraction and cheering me up. I vastly prefer streams for that as I can actually turn my brain off during those normally. It's something I've talked about before and something I'd like to change. Heck, I even at one point had a therapy goal to watch something at least once a week since that'd still be easier than streaming or writing. Whoops. *sigh*

I do also appreciate the recommendations! The reminders are good sometimes since I don't feel like I actually stay in the loop all that well. And since I kind of assume this is the same person who sent a list before, I decided I felt like actually responding, especially because the MLP pitch is an interesting one but man... That's a LOT of Starlight Glimmer I'd have to put up with when just like six episodes of her as a good guy made me want to light both her and Twilight on fire to put them out of their, and mine, misery. That's without me getting into the fact that I just think the characters in general got worse by then, almost like series shouldn't last for that long because finding new angles on characters becomes REALLY HARD (says the dumbass with a series of his own that honestly is longer than he should reasonably plan a story for.)

Again, late night rambling while my brain deals with suddenly snapping out of a hyper focus on a game for three days and doesn't deal with that well. *sigh* Have a good night everyone, take care of yourself and see you next tale.

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I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

A Twitter you can follow too

And a Kofi if you like what I do and want to help out with the fact that disability doesn’t pay much.

[scratchface]

5-minute thoughts on every ygo show?

Duel Monsters: The OG, which we must respect. Lots of incredibly interesting concepts packed into a fun series overflowing with style, but holy shit, it does not hold up without twelve shots of nostalgia blurring your vision. There's lots of great, iconic moments that will live on in people's hearts forever, but for every minute of Peak Television, there's thirty more of boring B plots and nonsensical plot writing. Battle City deserves to be remembered fondly, but it was consistently downhill from there.

Favorite character: the Spirit/Bakura. Always a delight to have on screen, elevated every scene he was in, even at the series' wonkiest.

GX: My original favorite! GX is a wild ride of highs, lows, and absurdity. The non-plot essential episodes here are a lot more fun than those of DM, and it made great use of the inherent absurdity of the setting (boarding school for learning a children's cardgame) to go completely bananas. It is a lot of fun to rewatch season two and three, which are packed with fun side characters, crazy antics, and of course, Judai's endless charisma. While far from perfect, every time I revisit it, I can't help but think the whole series is incredibly charming.

Favorite character: Judai. Special mention to O'Brien and Jim, though—they're my special little guys.

5Ds: The one I don't know too well, because I don't remember much of it and I've never managed to rewatch more than a few episodes at a time before dropping it. Everyone always praises it, but I just can't get into it. Zero appeal to me. Yusei seems cool, I guess.

Favorite character: Aki

Zexal: The best one. Like, objectively—yeah, I know, I refused to accept that at first too! I didn't want Zexal to be the best YGO either! But it is! It just is! I've rewatched it many times, thinking, "this time, with a more critical eye, I will realize its not that good!" but NO, it is that good—hell, I think it actually gets better every time you watch it! Which is crazy, 'cause so many of the first ~30 episodes are so so bad. But then it just gets better with every storyline! I could go on for hours about how much I love Zexal now; the setting, the cast, the plot. What seemed like a conflict between aliens actually turning out to be a war between heaven and hell was the sickest plot twist of all time.

Favorite character: Shark/Nasch, no contest. But shout out to everyone else too: Zexal has by far the best cast of any of the YGOs.

Arc-V: The disappointment. The opposite of Zexal. While Zexal starts with its weakest batch of episodes, Arc-V starts with its strongest, and its all downhill from there. So many duels in the first 50 episodes are just incredible, and there's so much intrigue, and every episode left you wondering. And then it just...struggles and flails its way to the end. Very little of ending is in anyway satisfying. If I think about it too much I get frustrated.

Favorite character: Sora! Sora does so much of the heavy lifting in keeping the plot of this series moving when everyone else seems determined to bring it to a screeching halt and nobody gives him enough credit for that.

Vrains: Ah, Vrains. If Arc-V started strong and ended by dragging its own corpse over the finish line, Vrains was struggling to keep its head above water from the start. Its an almost impressive blend of fantastic main characters with great depth (Yusaku, Ryoken, Ai) and the worst supporting cast you've ever seen. What characters weren't bad from conception get fumbled horribly at every opportunity. And yet, the conflict of the first season remains incredibly compelling. Yusaku and Ryoken's relationship remains one of the most fascinating I've seen in fiction. Unfortunately, its blatantly clear that the writers didn't have a plan. Big 'first draft' vibes. Could have been drastically improved if the writers had, you know, allowed the other Origins and Ignis to do things instead of giving Aoi three costume changes.

Favorite character: Yusaku. Love him.