#i've got you acting like you want more
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i've got you acting like you want more
my smutty submission for the @ficwip Hey, Sweetheart event
He stands in the shower, letting the water cascade over him and wash away the soap he used and the grime of his morning run. He is running his hands through his hair, making sure to get the conditioner throughout, eyes closed when the door to the shower behind him opens. He turns and smiles at Henry as he steps into the shower, sleep still clinging to him, eyes barely open. Alex pulls Henry to him and whispers, “Good morning, sweetheart,” smiling against Henry’s neck at his sleepy sigh. “What brings you out of bed already? I thought for sure you’d be there at least a few more hours since you didn’t get in until the wee hours of the morning.” Henry mumbles into his shoulder, “I turned over three different times, and you weren’t there; this time, I heard the shower and came to find you.” “Oh, so you came to lure me back to bed? I see how it is.” or a brownstone era pre-engagement the boys re-uniting after a week apart fic
big thanks to @magicandarchery & @england-would-fall for giving this lil thing a look over for me and making sure everyone's body parts stayed where they should lolđź’•
#hey sweetheart#@ficwip#red white and royal blue#firstprince#rwrb fic#smut#but sweet#i've got you acting like you want more
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Me: Ooooo, I wonder what this "Mouthwashing" thing is that everyone's been obsessed with lately. I should check some of it out.
Me, 30 minutes later: I would kill myself for you, Anya.
#i'm so obsessed with her#you don't even understand#i love her so much#she deserved better#she deserves the world#mouthwashing#anya mouthwashing#anya deserved better#anya deserved so much more#anya my beloved#mouthwashing game#look at her#i love her#fuck jimmy#all my homies hate jimmy#i will stab him for what he did to my girl#i will rip him apart with my mouth#she deserves to stab him to death at least a little bit#but honestly i love anya for so many reasons#not only is her plotline interesting and tragic as hell and she deserves better#but she is a legitimately interesting person and character outside of what happened to her#her dedication to her job and the fact that she was able to keep curly alive by herself for so long is extremely admirable#and i've heard about how she can act pretty playful and fun when outside of situations like the one she was in throughout the game#i really wish we got to see that side of her more#because it seems like her anxious and more timid personality is a bit of a trauma response which is understandable#so yeah i love her and i want to give her a pat on the head and a hug and maybe a gentle kiss on the forehead if she's okay with it#i prefer to comfort others via physical affection and i want to comfort her so badly#i don't know if i'd be the most helpful if i were a crewmate who learned what happened to her#(my way of helping would be offering to murder jimmy and i'm not sure if she'd want that because not all victims want that)#and sometimes physical affection/hug aren't helpful or preferred
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Already seen victim blaming on xitter đź‘Ť Lets not do that and lets leave the hermits alone. Make up your own minds on if you should support Iskall. But I feel like if one of his VH team members leaving for differing morals, the hermits going back 6 plus years to remove him from thumbnails and titles, and removing him from the site and merch should be enough Doc even said they can't talk about it which could mean anything, including something legal. Mumbo said there were no minors invovled but doesn't mean others weren't since there ARE victims Just leave the hermits be, and let the victims decide if they want to come out. And stop victim blaming lmao
#hermitcraft#drama#tagging it that tho its not drama and serious#Let the hermits have time to get through this too#as someone who has something like this happen and wasn't given that its not fun just leave them be#never got how that was so hard to do#sit back and wait but if they can't or won't talk about it accept that#I'm not going to talk about this#there is basically nothing out about it only things I've seen#you decide what you want to do#guess those people who wanted him out got what they wanted lol#I don't like people thinking it might be less of an issue cause stress left too jsut makes me hmm more#but not my monkies not my circus#Just needed a little venty vent cause I'm already seeing the same thing I went through and what I seen in the wc fandom happening#like stop demanding the hermits share#also stop saying but his mental health#mine is in a ditch on the side of the road and my friends have terrible mental health too and none of us ever acted out#🤷#dunno might delete this later#you can be upset just don't make it about YOU yknow
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Omg your instagram story is so right! I can’t believe I’ve never even noticed that, probably because in fanon keith and shiro are so close that I’d forgotten that isn’t canon :0
Deserves this awesome quote which I had to dig out of my sideblog reblogs
#for context - i was complaining how under-served we were to listen how much shiro did for keith and how amazing their relationship is#and then were forced to watch him just recruit him for school and be a decent teacher#like any teacher should#i mean....#any.#like he was just showing basic decency for not throwing Keith away for bad behavior#keith acted as if that man hung the moon#as if he was reliable... took a few punches that were meant for Keith ....risked something for him#wanted to give up his liver or something#gave up his last food in the apocalypse to feed him i dont fucking know#Keith acted as if that guy literally saved his life and we got scenes where Shiro is emotionally manipulating him to stay in school#or to become a leader#never really asking how he feels about it or if he needs help#i thought twice before saying Keith attached to a pile of shit because it was warm#but not thrice#i've re-watched season 1 of Arcane and was so mad about it i couldn't hold it in djdjdjd#i do think they could have a good relationship but what we were /shown/ was just not it too many plot holes to fill#love that the fandom can fill the discrepancies and rewrite those relationships though#and also i was really glad people answered to that story agreeing#i was feeling weird reading all those 'keith and shiro are my fav relationship in the show'#...lance was more warm to the mice than Shiro to Keith '#i feel like it owuld make more sense to me if keith did all of this WHILE being pissed at Shiro for leaving him#or if we saw he finds him unreliable - Shiro was only useful to him as long as Keith followed his rules too#Vander doing all he did for his daughters that shit was unconditional fucking love#vi and jinx never being able to off one another had more raw pure love than that#you know what i mean??? sorry im doing it again.... end of ramble#mezzy out đź’€
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Is there a more specific term than "agnostic" for me cause I feel like that implies "I believe in a deity/deities/spiritual relationship, I just don't exactly know which one or how"
My belief is less "I don't know" and more "I think there's the possibility of something out there it's just that it's none of my business." Like if we found out Zeus, Jesus Christ, and Ra are actually best buddies and go to trivia every Thursday and that the Rapture was supposed to happen 50 years ago and got cancelled or some shit and it's like..I answer phone calls at a front desk man idk what you want me to do with that info
#this probably is just 'agnostic' Id just like to feel special <3#I make minimum wage and you want me to worry about if there's a heaven or hell???#bro I don't care about purgatory I'm on the phone with my health insurance#It is flat out None Of My Business what's going on outside of this physical plane and I do not plan on changing that#It's the same way I feel about ghosts#Were my childhood homes haunted? Probably!#Am I gonna fuck around and find out? Absolutely fucking not!#What they get up to is none of my business. I'm gonna keep acting like they aren't there unless they need help and make it obvious#and even then I'm not doing more shit than like opening a window#I'm not gonna fuck around and accidentally anger some higher power or ghost cause I'm scared of uncertainty#I've got an exam due today like idk man what freaky shit higher powers do is their business I'm not tryna intrude on shit#Im also into the idea that the belief in a higher power creates them#Like even if there's no physical manifestation they've influenced your train of thought so much they might as well be#ex christian#religious trauma
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Thinking about Orchid and her connection to my take on Gender (because this was meant to be about her and the Crew but it just devolved into a character analysis kinda??? More trauma-dumping maybe???) This is very much an oc/personal rant so feel free to ignore it 🫡
So, Orchid started off as a character I didn't really think much of (hear me out this is going to be relevant) because I wanted to add a 'girl' character but didn't know what to *do* with her, y'know? She was always going to be the strongest one there, she had the odds stacked in her favor with her parents. She was always going to be the gloomy side-character to match Reset's energy. But I think she's gone through every stage of Generic Woman I could possibly find.
At first she was angry and abrasive (think Fell!Sans) where every other word was a curse and she was likely to throw the first punch then laugh as she kicks her enemy while they're down. This was when Reset was a cartoonishly self-centered villain whose goal was simply to prove others wrong. Then Orchid became a sort of sisterly figure. This was short-lived, but she was the one comforting people who Reset would torment, but would ultimately follow his orders, because at this point he was actually a danger and sadistic. And then there was the phase where the story mellowed out and she became the token Goth Girl who, yes she was strong, but was heavy on the 'whatever' energy. Then there was her Era of deep self-loathing and anxiety about her worth that held her back and made her a much more timid and meek character who would only lash out on occasion.
Now, Orchid is the best of those iterations I've written yet. She's calm, level-headed, and a natural leader. Her father raised those traits into her. But she's very reactive, and can be silly, and when she's comfortable it's likely that air of importance transforms into something more comfortable and familiar. She laughs loudly and grins wide, she likes loud video-games but loves to read in the quiet. She's extremely disciplined, and normally no one can get through her tough exterior besides her best friend, Reset. She does what she does for her own enjoyment, sure, but she's thought of every angle and makes her choice to help Reset and control the others with her whole chest. She still worries she won't live up to her invisible expectations, and that and her loyalty are her two driving forces.
I know that Orchid is important to me because she's the longest-running female oc I've had. I have a rough relationship with womanhood/girlhood and I know looking back that Orchid recieved every ounce of my distaste for being a woman that I could shovel into her. That never made her less of a character, she was actually always one of my favorites, and rarely was she a 'punching bag oc'. I just... projected onto her a lot. And she's a good sign of how I've learned who I am. I've decided that my own femininity is something I could live without. I'd rather not associate myself with it, and I'd like to leave it in my past, focusing on a future where I'm not tied down with any gender roles or expectations. That won't happen, but I've come to terms with it myself. Orchid though? I figured out through her that I don't have to hate women characters. My own distaste for my circumstances doesn't mean I have to push it onto my characters (on God I've never expressed anything rude to actual people, that'd be rude as hell and uncalled for, but I have a bad habit of disliking fictional women in media). So, Orchid is a well-roubded character finally. She has motivations abd goals and a *lot* more depth than I ever expected her to. She's happy with being a woman, she's content. She's not treated differently for it in unfair ways by those she cares about, so she doesn't mind it. She likes to wear pretty outfits and lets Reset add bows to her ribbons. She doesn't let being a woman hold her back in the slightest.
So, yeah. Orchid is one of my babies. If I ever leave this Fandom behind for good, she's one that's coming with (Ichor, Orchid, and Pretender all have human designs I can use elsewhere lol-) but in the meantime I'll just rotate her around in my brain for a while longer.
If I'm right, she's been with me for nearly 5-6 years and I went through a *lot* with her as an outlet. So, she's kinda just like an old stuffed animal. A lil ripped, matted fur, maybe a stain or two, but there's a story there and that makes it important beyond belief.
#spotatalk#i'm just gonna drop this in the queue I guess?#but I'm writing this on the last day of june so....#whenever this rolls around will be a jumpscare abd a half I guess?#I think honestly I coukd do a full breakdown of the Crew and why they're all expressions of me but like#quick summary is#Reset: Wants approval from people but mostly clings to the past. is afraid of losing his brother and acts on it to bring him back. i#<- I lack that conviction to do whatever you have to to get your way. i worry my brother and I have a weird gap between us we wont repair#Orchid: Uhhh woman. lots of pressure that she had at one time that's now no being pressed but she still tries to live up to it also.#<- I don't like the pressure of being a woman. also gifted-kid who cannot move past the pressures imposed to be 'perfect' and it's screwed#Stereo: Pulled into a situation he doesn't want to be in initially. it's bad for him but he likes the people so he decides to stay#<- I see the good in people. even when they hurt others around me. I was a bystander often and should've left the situations. paralelling.#Monochrome: Afraid. No purpose or preperation in life. soneone offers to guide him and he takes that offer because it's better than home.#<- Kinda self-explanitory but I've got little direction and feel lost a lot of the time. If I'm given a path I usually walk it no hesitation#and... for fun let's do some others!#Haphazard: Cleaning up after others since childhood. he's never really gotten a break and sees any sort of mess as an enemy#-> He's fixing rifts in universes I gotta patch relationships. there's so much conflict and I'm always so overwhelmed by it#Lost: He's got amnesia. no clue where he is. where he's from. who you are. who he is. he'll know when he gets there. he's sure.#-> I've been hsving minor issues with my memory for years. i coukd be forgetful but sometimes it just escapes me and that's spooky#Teddy: Isolated in her universe for years. she self-mutilated until she liked herself. when she finally met people she compulsively lied#-> Much more extreme version of how isolated I sonetines feel. hobbies can't replace human interaction but it's hard#oh and Ichor: God who loves mortals but cannot seem to find ones who will prove hin right for his trust and care#<- I've got a big heart. i express it often but the sentinent is scoffed off a lot. I get beat down about it and just keep moving forward#Pretender: Knows who he is. however the world doesn't like it much so he acts how they expect him to or isolates away#<- I still present femme when I'm nb/agender. i bend and break to people's perception of me. if I can't solve something I run.#okay I feel more insane than when ai started but these stupid skeletons have helped me through so many mental health problems it's only a#little bit funny 🙏
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hey
#so i've been dealing with some irl stuff recently#nothing too bad. it was just really frustrating and exhausting for me. and really putting a damper on my mood and my art#and i'm sorry if i've been acting a little weird or not saying too much or anything#or if i've been kinda inactive for the past few days#but i'll be okay!#i just wanted to let you guys know what's been kinda going on#i'm slowly working on something really sweet involving Hugo and Noa. so that's been making me feel better#i need something happy and soft between them lol#also! I've been playing The Quarry recently!#the writing is kinda stupid and almost all of the characters act like they don't have a brain. but that's what makes it so fun!#and i'm pretty sure the devs did that intentionally. to make it seem more like a campy monster flick#i'm really enjoying it so far! the werewolves are really cool!#also it's really funny to me how they just pop like balloons whenever they're transforming#i thought it was gonna be a slow transformation. but no. their skin just immediately explodes off#and then they somehow get it all back when they turn back into humans? idk how that works but it's pretty rad#also also! the thing with the tarot cards is really cool!#i missed a lot in the beginning because i didn't know what i was looking for#and the fortune teller lady in between chapters kept getting mad at me for not finding any#but i eventually started to get it! when the game decided to really put one in my face in chapter 3 lol#and the thing with the tarot cards representing the different characters in the game got me thinking about what card Noa would probably be#i think Seven of Swords would be right up her alley#because it's associated with deception. dishonesty. betrayal. and acting strategically#and it could also signify self-deception and confessions. which is all very true for her character#aaahh now i wanna make a tarot card design for her!#but that's an idea for another day#anyway sorry for sorta rambling a bit#i hope you all are doing okay
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god i finally watched new episodes my honest reaction is jgiwoaoKzmxmkwkakkak
#it kinda doesnt feel real for me idk why#like i do not actually process all of it??#tho I DO have ideas and thinking i did pay attention#maybe i've just had a wild day i guess#but also oh god vex'ahlia broke my heart#twice#first time were when scanlan was talking how he couldn't be at two places at the same time to help 'em and she said nobody gives a fuck#i feel so bad for scanlan rn i love him#haven't watched campaing to the bard's lament yet but oh fuck im too spoiled i do know what happens where (a little bit)#the second time was when she said she really cares for percy i started crying at that moment#also im a lil bit disappointed cuz i thought we would get percys death and vex's spech but we got “i open the door completly naked” scene ->#and im very happy we got it like oh wow i didn't expect that#but idk im just a girl and i love percahlia's slowburn#since i watched 64 eps of actual campaign it become hard for me to not compare campaign and tlovm cuz obviosly its very different#but with percahlia in tlovm we don't have hours and hours of campaign context#(we don't have percy making her arrows)#and i understand why cuz 100+ streams 3+ hours each is one thing and animated series with 12 eps of 25 minutes is another#but as i said previosly it is very hard for me to not compare it#by the way i do think changes in tlovm make sense#cuz like?? i think vex is more sharpy in tlovm than in campaign?? like#like she punced scanlan in first season and in campaign they are kinda good friends and i really love them??#*punched#and i think she's more ?? bossy i guess?? idk how to put it into words but in my head it makes sense “i open the door completly naked” ->#goes earlier than “i shouldve told you its yours” cuz shes playing pretend even more than in campaign???#acts like its casual when its actually isnt AT ALL#and im glad percy said “what is it i want” to vex cuz its kinda like that scene in campaign when percy talked to vax#when he called them all family for the first time and said he's trying to find what he wants in life#i love percy and vax dynamic btw#i wanted to write even more here but apparently i can do only 30 tags wtf#they want me to actually write posts oh no. hate to put it all in tags but im too nervous abt posting on the internet
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First of all, a delightful name for a quest. Love it.
Second of all, this honestly should've been a short quest where you collect clues and have some banter, which would culminate in this conversation. I think as such this conversation is perfectly fine. (Well, at least with my limited knowledge of the topic as a cis woman.) However, just going there and having this talk, without more context and a little more build up, feels... a little abrupt, and (maybe I'm dense but) I was confused about how Taash arrived at the conclusion that the Antaam was blighting dragons. (Then again, when playing a new game, I can get distracted, so I might have missed something before.) They identify the Antaam by finding the ropes, which makes sense to me, but the rest seems less clear. I do appreciate what they're trying to do with Taash and the kind of story they're trying to tell, probably knowing full well how that's going to go, considering the state of the internet these days. I think that's great, and I really enjoy Taash as a character. But I said in my "review" before that Taash could use more questing, and I wanted to show what I meant. This is one of those moments when I thought, "This should've been a short quest instead of just a dialogue cutscene." Then again, I like dialogue cutscenes, so I can't complain too much, but I do think that if there were some more clues and banter leading up to this conversation, it would help us better understand the situation with the blighted dragons, because that tells us something about the methods of the main villains which connects it to the main plot, and also Taash as a character that is working through something very difficult which is undoubtedly a process worth showing.
#Dragon Age#Dragon Age: The Veilguard#DATV#Veilguard#Taash#DATV spoilers#Veilguard spoilers#honestly I can barely imagine what it's like to be figuring this all out in real life with access to the internet#let alone in a universe where you have maybe some books and a word of mouth - thankfully we have Neve's connections#but I've got to say that the stuff Taash is going through is surprisingly relatable... except for them it's an identity thing#and for me it is... was... internalized misogyny I guess... and norms and stereotypes#'nobody likes to be a woman'#'she said I act more like a man than a woman. why does it feel right?'#like I know this feeling and I'm a cis woman#funnily enough I was told I'm 'worse than a man' just a couple of days ago because I was angry haha#like this whole thing made me think about what being a woman even means to me and fuck if I know#like I'm not questioning my gender‚ I'm fine in that department#but when I had my Rook say 'I do like being a woman' I thought 'do I?' don't think I've ever felt so strongly about it as to say I like it#but it's like... fine I guess#it definitely sometimes feels like I'm a woman in a different way than... well... most women I know#not in a 'not like the other girls' kind of way I mean. more like a bull in a china shop way in comparison#like I don't feel 'feminine' shaped enough or 'feminine' flavoured enough or whatever#like I want to be pretty and look good in a dress and I envy some women's 'feminine' beauty but at the same time... couldn't be me#I mean it's all bullshit isn't it? it shouldn't matter#but like I get it#I get where that is coming from
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oh ho ho!!!! i actually finished a fic !!!! and i'm proud of how it turned out, i think this world is fun and i have so many thoughts about it
Gigi Goode, daughter of Viscount Goode, has always dreamed about the kiss that would make color bloom across her skin. It used to be a faceless person, just something to project her current childhood crushes onto. And then she met Crystal Methyd, her lady's maid, and suddenly her dream soulmate takes a different form. Not that she could ever tell her that, of course, especially since they're such close friends. Still, she lets herself dream. Maybe one day a kiss from her soulmate (that she really should stop imagining as Crystal) will change her life completely, and her aimless fantasies of love, companionship, and a beautiful mosaic of color across her skin will become reality. But until then, she'll keep dreaming.
#this was based on an ask i got that i'll post in a sec :)#but i have been having whole worldbuilding talks with my roommate about this fic that's how into it i've gotten#if anyone wants to hear more about the customs and how nobility acts about soulmates in this au please ask me i can talk forever#i don't know who i'd make the princess though. that's why she remained nameless in the fic <3#gi writing? it's more likely than you think#crygi
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Okay so we know Luigi makes Mario’s coffee for sure, but whats Luigi’s drink of choice? He strikes me more of a hot choccy guy, and if thats the case, when hes had a bad day does mario make some for him and kiss it out of his moustache? (cause you know the whip cream probably gets stuck in their staches)
Luigi is 100% a sweet drink kind guy. For comfort he loves a hot meal and a hot drink and stupid amounts of sugar. Strawberry milk and Hot Chocolate are for sure his defaults, drinks a lot of sweet tea as well.
Mario's not a Make something for someone when they're having a bad day kinda guy, he likes to tackle a problem as head on as possible and fix it. Not everything can be fixed though, and he understands that. Luigi's really good at comforting himself, and Mario tends to just be nearby for physical comfort when that kind of thing happens.
Mario absolutely takes full advantage when Luigi makes himself a cup of hot chocolate though, he's a kissing fiend. There will be no sads so long as he is in kissing distance
Luigi's convinced he's just trying to steal the whipped cream from his drink. And like. Maybe he is a little.
#Emile's Arts#Mariocest#Mario kissu kissu physical affection tight hugs and playful kisses you understand??#Luigi acts of service a warm drink and a hot meal and a listening ear do you???? understand???#I love them#Luigi can more of less comfort himself over anything Mario can't physically tackle for him#And if he can't Mario's got hugs and kisses to spare#I cannot over sell how in love Mario is with Luigi I like. I couldn't. I can't express it enough I feel like#I can draw all the little hearts I want it's simply not enough#They kissu kissu my entire brain#Zayne I love you so much mwah mwah thankyou for the brainrotting fluffy sweet content#As they deserve#Whipped cream in him stache I never thought about it but you're simply so correct#Whipped cream kisses... Hhhhh#I love them soooo much#Also just a little bit of weegi with a ponytail I'm figuring it out#This is not the way I've decided but I'll figure it out
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Ugh I was excited for today until I found out I'd have to spend it with people that actively make me hate being alive hate the future and drain me off all energy physically mentally spiritually like a vampire I can't stand to be around her she is the definition of stupidity and even then that's generous as fuck this bitch has filled her brain with so much garbage I watch her brain cells die at alarming rates every single time she uses her vocal cords her giggles make me want to jam a sewing needle into my ear repeatedly so I can never have to hear it again its a friendly reminder that my parents decisions this time my dad's constantly makes me want to die
#i cant even shes just so dangerously stupid#she thinks energy drinks with natural caffeine are safe to give people who have been told by doctor doing take caffeine with thia meds#ahe thinks of a child is CHOCKING to lie them face down n rub their back#she has the evangelical woman voice worse then women I've met n that cult ahe giggles constantly and behaves like the stereotype lil german#boy just got a lollipop over.... everyone and everything whe acts likw an 11 year old I just got the first boyfriend and all they could talk#is how perfect their boyfriend is and they're so pretty good for that I pulled a boyfriend is and it's like a God thing that they met how#SOOOOOOOOOO in love while constantly nonstop touching ahe has to be touching him her hand on his thigh her atm linked with his her heaf on#his chest she has to be in her lap they make out all over the place IT'S DISGUSTING AND EMBARRASSING STOP SWAPPING SPIT#she started a i. hwr words 'love diary of their love journey' they hadn't been dateing 2 months her kids are spoiled fake Instagram bitches#with such shitty views on politics SHE'S A TRUMP FAN GIRL SHENLOVES TRUMP MY DAD BROUGHT IN A TRUMPIE#there's so much i cant even say because even admitting it on tumblr is too embarrassing i wanted.to.likw her i liked her the first day but#THE MORE I GET TO KNOW GET THE MORE N MORE N MISS RED FKAGS#she threw away all my siblings clothes school books toys uniforms for sports their in toys i bought them that week make up jewelry#in the disguise of helping clean house#while i was at the hospital the kids call me in tears i call her beg her to wait and nope.ahe didn't i found the bags by the curb i brought#my dad sided with hwr because 'she didn't mean any harm she didn't know sje was throwing them away'#my mom hasn't bsen dead a year he started dating right after ahe died#hes talking about marrying this woman this woman who has never had an honest educated thought once in her life#WHO ASLO SPEMDA MONEY LIKE A DRUNKEN SAILOR AHE CAME FROM A WITCH FAMILY HER LAST TWO HUSBANDA WERE TOUCH SHE HAS NO KNOWLEDGE OF THE COMMON#SHE SPENDS LIKE SHE STILL HAS MONEY WHEN SHE DOSE NOT AND IT'S LIKE YOU DID NOT JUST SPEND OVER 180 DOLLARS N PASTRIES GOD#SHES SO FUCKIN STUPID AND EVERY HOLIDAY SINCE MY MOM DIED WVERY FAMILY GWT TOGETHER BECAUSE WE DON'T TALK OR.DO ANYTHING WITH MOM'S SIDE#OF THE FAMILY ANYMORE SHE'S THERE EVERY WINGLE MOTHER FUCKIN WEEKEND SHES HERE I'M EXHAUSTED SHES PHYSICALLY AND MENTALLY DRAINING TO BE ARO#OUND SHES LIKE IF SOMEONE TOOK A GOLDEN RETRIEVER ON A DIET OF JUST FUCKIN COCAINE LITTLE GERMAN BOY WITH LOLLY AND CRUELLA DEVILLE AND FUSE#THEN TOOK A STRAW AND DRANK ALL THE SMARTS OUT OF THAT BEING#UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGH MY DADS GOIN TO NARRY RHIA BITCH SHES GOIN TO TRY TO BE A MOTHER TO ME AND MY SIBLINGS AND THEY'RE GOIN TO#be so fucked up because her kids are not ok SHE FUCKED THEM OVER BAD SHE HAS FOUR KIDS ALL ADULTS THEY'RE JUST WOW#I HATE MY LIFE I HATE WHAY FUTURE MY FAMILY IS GOIN TO BE THE GOOD THINGS IS I WON'T HAVE TO STAY I CAN GO N MAKE A NEW ONE WITH MY WIFE#FOR ME BUT MY SIBLINGS ARE FUCKED AND ANYTIME I WANT TO VISIT MY FAMILY YANDERE GOLDEN RETRIEVER BITCH WILL BE THERE WORMING HWR WAY IN#SHES CONSTANTLY CALLING N TEXTING MY DAD NONSTOP OF SHE'S NOT NEXT TO HIM AND IF HE CAN'T RESPOND INSTANT SHE FREAKS OUT N BUGS ME
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I usually really look forward to Thanksgiving and Christmas, as it means my family getting together for big holiday meals. But this year feels different. Everyone's got their own families now and aren't getting together like they used to. My mom will likely be with her fiance, my nephew, and their friends. My sister will be with her husband, daughters, and in-laws. I don't feel like I have a place this year.
#last year felt similar#it all felt very rushed#and the only reason I had anywhere to go on thanksgiving is because my mom felt bad and invited me last minute#which only happened because I got emotional when she told me her plans#I don't want to be an afterthought because you felt guilty#include me in the plans from the start or not at all#and christmas was super rushed too#we all got together at my mom's and were passing out presents#and I started crying because there were no more presents under the tree and I hadn't gotten anything#it turned out there was one last present for me#but it was some cheap knockoff 'gaming' box#that looked like it cost $20 at a gas station#and my sister got me fucking candy in a mason jar#which I had to act so happy about#like that's a nothing gift!#I put so much time and effort into my gifts#but nobody does the same for me#they all just laugh and say I'm hard to buy gifts for#and then get me stupid shit that has very little thought into#I'VE MADE YOU ALL CRY WITH MY GIFTS#and you give me shit#I've loved art movies and hot wheels most of my life#and I'm a huge collector of things#y'all know the characters I love#don't worry about if I have it already or not#just put some effort and thought into it
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I really am so sad I don't like isat. The themeing was very good
#isat critical#like the ''we must be prepared for the destruction change will bring'' shit came back so hard at the end#specifically with loop context/destroying themself to become a star. to become loop#and the fact that when siffrin deviated from the script. finally changed the way he performed his play (act 5)#that's when it broke#and he had to ''destroy'' his friends to do it. In a way. When all he knew how to do was fight/snapped#and it's like. of COURSE loop is how siffrin was able to escape. Because escaping the loop meant siffrin had to save/love themself#value their own life and not just their friend's#to realize that they couldn't do it on their own. that they needed their friends to help them out of it. they needed support#that being loved was more than saying the right thing or doing the right quest#isat is so strong structurally/thematically/plot-wise and I personally despise it comedically/character/dialogue writing-wise#and the whole game is dialogue. like isat is the most conflicting experience I've had in a while#Where I hate actually reading the dialogue and I don't like the character writing but I love thinking about it's themes. like hello#that sucks i'd rather have it just be one or the other#*aaravos voice* you must live life in the grey#Like the king and siffrin foil is my beloved. And I absolutely adore how the King's story was ended.#But I dislike siffrin as a character and I also hate most of the game's execution#like every emotional beat is made anticlimactic by the lack of subtext and the constant repetition#(literally laughed out loud at ''my house my country my HOME!'' like we said the same thing 3 times babe. the whole game is like this)#isat has a huge case of ''we wanted conflict but didn't give characters any real flaws to be able to do it''#idk. Everyone repeated over and over that they don't touch siffrin because he's uncomfortable with it. Over and over.#And yet he's still like. ''It's because Isa finds you disgusting'' Huh. Idk if we did the work for Siffrin to come to that conclusion#Like literally Isa never does anything to even imply that. All he's ever done is sing Sif's praises. makes me feel crazy#Like ''oh he views everyone else as just a character!! a pawn!'' except no he doesn't. he barely did in act 5#and even in act 5 he's horrified at how he treated odile. like. we did not commit to that. I got sad lukewarm flowey#Do not even get me started on odile's ''I think it's so cute you trapped yourself in time and went crazy because you love us''. Girl#Like no we can. We can commit. Siffrin did bad things and going crazy was bad. Odile wasn't wrong to be upset.#Like why not 'That was terrible of you to say. But I won't leave you—you still love people who make mistakes- because what else is there?'#like we got so close with the worst loop being the permanent loop. Siffrin is still loved no matter what. But idk. Felt brushed off#oh isat...you strange being...
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Also in the replies of the Steph concept art on twitter announcing she was gonna be in a new project at DC (posted by Travis Mercer), there were at least 3 comments saying "will Tim be there?" I don't care how hard you ship timsteph I'm exploding you with my eyeballs if you do that on my girls post again
#ramblings of a lunatic#taking a step back to acknowledge that my stanning may be getting overzealous#but then again I'm not in ppls quotes or replies I'm vagueing on an entirely different website with no relevant tags. it could be worse#anyway I know tims had it rough these past couple of months ever since zdarsky shifted focus of the batman title to have less tim#but it still feels. idk. just a wee bit uninspired to act like steph can't go two steps without tim being behind her#im ngl i like timsteph when they're cute but timsteph twitter has been. pissing me off a tad lately#the refusal to acknowledge the sexism in dixons robin run and how it impacts stephs writing and their relationships writing#the refusal to acknowledge tims occasional condescension and hypocrisy when it comes to stephs vigilantism#seemingly only wanting her to be spoiler when he wants her around and telling her to give it up most of the time#also the constant disrespect of stephs batgirl era on there weirdly enough?#I've harped on about this on main and in drafts but despite it's flaws it's a good turn for stephs character#she's the focus she gets development (an upward trajectory! which had previously been unheard of for her! bc she did have flaws as spoiler-#-its just that both writers and characters alike seemed to arbitrarily decide she didn't have the capacity to grow past them! but she did!)#hell i saw a BIZARRE take today i just have to bitch about#which was them saying that Batgirl was a ''heteronormative mask'' steph put on#with spoiler being her more authentic self (and this being paralleled to gender expression with stephs isolation from the batfam as spoiler-#-showing how she ''wasnt like them'')#which. I'm not denying you the view that spoiler has a certain genderific swag to her but the needless dragging of her batgirl persona#steph got treated badly as spoiler bc she was A Girl. it's genuinely that simple dixon felt batman and robin would never stand for a girl-#-running around doing the things they did and would need to chivalrously stop her. he's gone on record saying this#she's constantly getting belittled by mostly men (cass also dismisses her but it feels distinctly less gendered)#and in the end it's barbara who learns to give steph a second chance despite her mistakes and they have a positive relationship#something ppl are quick to dismiss as being in and of itself sexist bc they're pairing the two girls off together#as if batgirl isn't a legacy and as if babs and steph don't have parallels in their resilience and refusal to accept when ppl tell them no#for better and for worse!!#like. idk how you took the strongest feminist element in that comic (bc there are elements of sexism here and there! 2009 n all)#and somehow turn it into ''heteronormativity'' YOU PPL ARE JUST SAYING WORDS AT THIS POINT!!!#anyway. someone take away my internet access
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I'm trying to play through FF16 but it's honestly such a struggle for me. The combat isn't my sort of thing, and I feel like everyone talks at like... half the speed of normal dialogue so I just lose interest in every single cutscene.
#i'm like 8 hours in#i think i've been bored the whole time#benedikta's backstory had (missed) potential#but i hate how so much context is in the stupid ATL thing#as though the slow cutscenes need more interruption#also why is clive's head so small compared to the rest of his body it's like less than a third of his total shoulder width#and why does his outfit look like it was designed for a different setting than everyone else's? i miss his soldier armour so much#also all the sidequests are terrible#i don't want to spend 3 minutes listening to someone's life story because i gave them soup#maybe if they spoke at a normal pace#also the whole got inspiration is clearly just nudity and swearing and rapey implications from bandits#it's like they wanted to be more 'mature' but just added all of that and it moved back round to 'immature'#eikon fights aren't even good you just mash buttons until they're staggered#throw out all your special abilities#and then wait until a cutscene happens and you do more damage with a single QTE than anything you do in combat#but you can't even watch the action because there's stupid pulsing overlays while you mash square#gav is the best character#also the voice acting is good (i question some of the voice direction) but considering they lipsynced for english first...#i don't buy any of these voices are coming out of any characters mouths#also ifrit's design sucks he's just a featureless rock thing#rant
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