#i'm the LAST person on earth to ever commit

[ode2rin]

thinking abt being bffs w reo and you guys did that pact thing where you promise to marry each other if both of you are still single at a certain age but loser boy right here deliberately misunderstood that so he stayed single on purpose FUCK I MISS HIM the highway is looking too comfortable right now

[awearywritersworld]

the boy spurned as evil and the girl of his youth

sukuna x reader w/c: .6k tags/warnings: angst, i'm afraid. young!sukuna. depictions of blood. ur dad's an asshole. fem!reader. no use of y/n. a/n: please check out the lovely artwork by @demonzaemon that inspired this piece!!! i'm definitely down to write a second part about a reunion, so let me know if that would interest anyone! masterlist read part two here

thinking about sukuna at 10 years of age— he's been abandoned by his family and scorned by his village because of the strange way he looks. he has to steal stale bread during the night to survive. he has to take shelter in the ruins of an abandoned home. he has to bear the harsh elements. he has to do it all alone.

that is, until he meets a curious little girl by the riverside during the spring. he'd found an old, frayed fishing net the day prior, and while he hopes to catch something he can eat for dinner, he catches your attention instead.

and you marvel at him as if he's the most remarkable thing you've ever laid eyes on. you're poking at the harsh lines that mar his skin. you're pulling at his pink hair because you're convinced it's fake. you're counting his arms as if the extra two will eventually disappear.

he doesn't mind though. he's too caught up in the fact that someone's touching him. that he can feel the warmth of your skin against his. he can hardly believe it when you scamper off, calling over your shoulder gleefully, "i'll meet you here again tomorrow!"

after that, everything changes and he finds himself in your company more often than not. you sneak your meals out of the house each day, even though your portions are meager. you bring him a few of your blankets, even though it means you're cold at night. what he appreciates most though? the fact you look at him like he's human.

then, what is simultaneously the best and worst night of his life happens. you fall asleep beside him in the overgrown grass near the river. its early autumn by now and the stars are twinkling in the sky, so your body clings innocently to his, seeking his warmth.

he takes the opportunity to study you in the moonlight. to commit every detail of your face to memory. he considers the fact that you feel safe enough to fall asleep beside him, even when every other person in the world has deemed him evil and sinister.

eventually he's lulled to sleep by your slow and gentle breaths, but not before coming to the decision that he is yours and you are his. and while you're the only thing in the world that the young boy has to his name, he's okay with that.

then, all too soon, he's awoken by yelling and it's not a moment later that you're ripped from his arms by your father. he's screaming about how you've defiled yourself by associating with such a despicable fiend.

"no, he's my friend! he's good!" you wail, your arms stretched toward sukuna in a plea for help. "don't let him take me! please!"

and he tries. he really, really tries. he runs after your father, beating at his back in an attempt to free you, but he's just too small. his body is weak from years of malnourishment. the older man pushes him to the ground with little effort and sukuna's palms slice open upon the sharp stones protruding from the earth.

crimson spills from the wounds, but he can hardly feel it. the ache in his chest is too consuming. too agonizing. it's unfair that such a little body should house so much pain, but that seems to be the story of his relatively short life.

so as he calls out to you, his voice broken and desperate, he knows it's the last time he'll ever see you and he's forced to come to terms with the universe's cruel edict— that he deserves to spend his life alone.

[anonymityisfunwriter]

The GED

Pairing - Grumpy!Bucky Barnes x Sunshine!Reader Summary - There's more than one way to be smart. Or so you've been told. But how on Earth do you go about proving that you're not (the stupid, illiterate Avenger) dumb?

Anon's 1K Celebration | The GED Series List

"Can you please just listen to me?" Sam begs you. "I'm telling you this is a bad idea."

"Or it's an amazing idea and it'll all be for the better!" you counter, plating the last of your freshly baked chocolate chip cookies.

He snatches a cookie from the plate when he thinks you're not watching, "Or you'll make an already strained relationship like ten times worse."

You glare at him, snatching the cookie back and placing it back on the plate, "Or by then end of the day we'll have a new set of friends."

Bucky groans, entering the room just in time to hear your rebuttal to Sam's negativity, "Please, not more friends. I don't like the ones I have as it is."

"See?" Sam wildly gestures to Bucky. "When do we ever agree on anything? It just proves that this is a terrible idea!"

"Hi," Bucky finally greets you, gently pecking your lips. "Missed you. Now, who exactly are we trying to make friends with?"

"The SHIELD agents downstairs," you blithely reply.

Bucky quirks an eyebrow at you, "Why? They hate us."

"That's exactly what I said!" Sam frantically exclaims.

"Have we ever asked ourselves why they hate us?" you muse. "Maybe we need to be a little nicer to them."

"Or maybe it's because they're bitter and jealous that we're better than them," Sam remarks.

"Well, it's definitely not because of Sam's incredible sense of humility," Bucky sarcastically retorts.

"Shut up," Sam snarks. "And we are better. Our stats are better, we get first pick of assignments, our mission times are like a third of theirs, Fury trusts us a hell of a lot more, and we get all the good snacks."

"And that means we can't be friends?" you rhetorically ask. "We work together all the time!"

"Listen, it's not that bad of a deal," Bucky tries to convince you. "They tolerate us. We tolerate them. It's never caused a problem on missions or anything, so who cares? Not everyone in this world is going to like you."

"Who else doesn't like me?" you frantically question, quirking an eyebrow at Bucky.

"Everyone likes you," Bucky assures you.

"Except the people downstairs," Sam teases.

"That's it!" You throw your hands up in frustration. "I'm going down there. I'm just going to bring these cookies down there and talk to them. They're just people, I'm sure they're all really nice!"

"Nice going," Bucky mutters to Sam, elbowing him in the ribs. "Come on, can't we just leave well enough alone? Isn't it enough that the people who actually know you like you? And not to mention, I like you and I don't like anybody."

"Aww.." you coo at Bucky, caressing his cheek. "Nope, too late, I'm committed."

"Why?" Sam groans. "You're never going to get everyone in the world to like you!"

"Oh, yes, I can! I've spend my entire time out in the world cultivating a personality that's impossible not to like just to satisfy my compulsive people pleasing tendencies."

Bucky's eyebrows furrow as a teasing smile pulls at the corner of his mouth, "People really don't see this side of you enough."

Sam nods, "You're a little scary when you think people don't like you."

"Scary or strangely endearing?" you wonder.

"Scary! Definitely scary!"

Bucky sighs to himself, pinching the bridge of his nose, "You're not going to leave this alone, are you?"

You beam at the two of them, scooping up the plate of cookies, "Not even a little bit."

"It's a bad idea!" Sam bellows down the corridor as you walk away from him.

You roll your eyes as you step onto the elevator and tell Friday to take you to the third floor, where the SHIELD agents typically hung out.

It wasn't a bad idea. It was a great idea. What could go wrong with trying to bring people closer together? They were just people. They were people you had to trust with your lives, why not get to know them a little bit more?

As you step off the elevator, you immediately notice that this layout is almost identical to the one upstairs, except without all the extravagant touches of Tony Stark. You amble down the hallway, looking for a sign of anyone. You figure if the layout is the same, their common room will be in the same place as the one upstairs. 

You're right, you realize when you start to hear faint voices from where you thought their common room would be. Even all the way down the hall, voices echo off the walls as you make your way closer.

You certainly don't mean to eavesdrop or listen into a conversation that you're not supposed to hear.

No, you definitely don't mean to eavesdrop on your new friends, but the open floor plan does nothing to dampen the sounds of their booming voices. 

"Yeah, I leave first thing tomorrow," an unfamiliar voice sighs.

"Who with?" someone else asks.

You don't like the way they spit Bucky's name out in disgust, "Barnes."

"Oh, he's the worst!" the same voice dramatically groans. You silently scoff at the insinuation that Bucky was the worst. "He just sits and stares like he's got nothing better to do."

"Please, I'd take him over his girlfriend any day," a different female scoffs.

You freeze at the mention of yourself. You know you should go. You shouldn't be listening to this. The things they were saying were definitely not nice, but neither was eavesdropping.

"Oh come on, she's not that bad."

You sigh in relief, feeling a little better that someone was defending you. You could go upstairs and tell Sam that he was wrong, not all the SHIELD agents were that bad.

And in the next second, you were proved very, very wrong.

"She's just such an idiot!" Your stomach twists in knots as the same SHIELD agent continues complaining about you. This is what you got for eavesdropping, you tell yourself. They're entitled to their own opinions about you. Better yet, you could change their minds and show them that there was more to you than what meets the eye. You just don't want to believe that people can be this mean, that it's so easy for them to be this casually cruel. They just didn't know you. You were sure that if they did know you all, they wouldn't be saying such awful things. "I don't know what everyone sees in her, but I swear I can see right through that whole Sunshine act."

"I dunno, she acted like that on the last mission I had with her."

"She didn't let up? Not once?"

"Nope! The whole time."

"I'd rather get caught by the bad guys then deal with her for a whole week."

"Who knows, maybe Barnes likes them dumb," the agent giggles. The words feel like a punch to the gut. You want to leave, to turn on your heels and pretend like you never heard a thing, but you're frozen in shock. "Like a Stepford Wife thing."

"If that's true, then they'll be together forever," the same agent, the one going on a mission with Bucky tomorrow, jokes. 

"What do you think they even talk about?"

"Who knows?"

"My question is what kind of adult makes it knowing as little as she does?"

"The kind with Fury in their back pocket."

"Exactly! It's the only reason she's even apart of the team. I'd bet anything she's never even picked up a book."

"Can I tell you guys something?" an agent exclaims. "Someone got into a bunch of their files upstairs. And guess what? She can't even read! She's illiterate! An illiterate Avenger!"

Your blood runs cold. Those were private. They held so much intimate information about you and your history and they were using it to make fun of you, make fun of the people that chose to love you.

You weren't sure what was worse, that they were using your past to make fun of you, or that they knew intimate details of your past, they knew the torment you were put through as a child and they still thought it was funny, they still used it as a way to belittle you. As though you had any control over it. As though it was your fault.

It's only then that you realize that tears are staining your cheeks, that you're still standing in the hallway with a plate of cookies as a peace offering for the SHIELD agents making fun of you and your friends. 

"Probably doesn't even know what a book is. Maybe her next mission should be a day of kindergarten."

It's mean. It's meaner than they have any right to be, but a lightbulb goes off in your head as you finally regain the ability to leave.

You furiously wiped away your tears, storming down the corridor and back to your side of the Compound. You leave the plate of pastries on the counter for your team mates.

And you made a decision right then and there. You wouldn't cry. You wouldn't try to convince them that you were smart. You would just do better. Be better. You were going to show them that you could be more than the illiterate Avenger. 

In that very moment, you decide your very next mission: School.

AnonymityIsFun Masterlist Grumpy Sunshine Series Anon's 1K Celebration

As always, let me know what you think! Reblogs and comments are always appreciated! 💛

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[astrobiscuits]

Astro observations part 8

[LONG EDITION] - taken from my phone's notes (also, i was too lazy to edit it so here's a nice chunk of info)

🍂 Sun conjunct Saturn individuals inherit mindsets from the father, grandparents or great-grandparents. They might never fully act like their Sun sign (aka "shine"), since they've been conditioned from a young age to listen to parents, teachers, and later on bosses. They are the type to never divorce, no matter how toxic their marriage is. If these peeps deal well with their Saturn Return, they might become "THE BOSS" (aka the person everyone looks up to due to how accomplished, disciplined and rich they are, they've literally got their shit together and deserve a round of applause, "it wasn't easy to get to the top, but it was worth it" - you might hear them say this). They are also more prone to ingrain stoic principles in their lifestyle

🍂 Mars square Neptune gives off major cult leader vibes. They're the type to fool you with false promises until you sign up for their "camp" but then you realize it's actually an evil cult where all they wanna do is put you to work (and maybe later even kill you lol). These individuals become very scary when angry (you don't wanna see them angry, trust me). If they ever commit suicide, it'll be by drowning, alcohol or drugs

🍂 Mars trine Neptune is one of the best aspects for those who make a living off their talents. The talent depends on the element the trine is in:

If it's in Earth signs - ideal for those who work in the "money handling sector" in advertising, becoming an entrepeneur, holistic care (if Virgo is involved), cooks, those who work in interior design, seamstresses, embroidery/lace makers, models, event planners If it's in Air signs - ideal for those who work in sales (their negotiation skills are ✨chef's kiss👌🏻✨), becoming a spiritual/religious teacher or an art/music/any other creative pursuit teacher (lmao, i can't even speak💀💀), writers, musicians, magicians and astrologers (for the last two - if Aquarius is involved) If it's in Fire signs - ideal for dancers, theater/movie actors, hairstylists, circus performers, photographers (only if Leo is involved) If it's in Water signs - ideal for make-up artists, painters, tarot readers

🍂 Moon sextile Uranus individuals have got the ability to create a positive parasocial relationship with their followers. Since these people often use their devices to validate their emotions, i wouldn't be surprised if most of y'all also have atleast one active profile where you post quite frequently

PRO TIP: Whenever Transit Jupiter is trining/conjuncting your Natal Uranus (to a less extent also the sextile), you'll get a sudden boost in your followers count

🍂 This is a theory of mine that i've come up with and i'd love to hear your thoughts on it. When it comes to intergenerational astrology, i do believe that we inherit all of our personal planets placements from our parents and ancestors. But then you might say "But i don't act like my mother at all! This is bullshit!". I'm not saying we're all carbon copies of our family members. What makes us unique and distinguishes us from our parents and grandparents (or even great-grandparents) are the way the planets aspect each other in our birth charts and the planetary configurations between them. Basically we start from the same ground, but we all use our traits differently, whether for the better or the worst expression of them. Let's not forget that we also tend to go through different life experiences than our parents and grandparents; we might be blessed with different opportunities that might enhance our best traits and help us achieve what our ancestors always wanted to but weren't able to

Hope you enjoyed today's post, loves!💗💗💗 I've been wanting to post for a while now but my inspiration has been wandering alone in the Sahara Desert I can't promise that i'll start posting again more frequently (the new uni year is starting soon for me + i enrolled in a local astrology school 2 weeks ago🥳🥳 ya girl can't wait to officially become an astrologer) but my inbox will be open again for further questions! I must also thank you for helping me hit 500 followers!!! I'm probably gonna do another ask game once i hit 600 followers, as i'm too busy right now. As always, don't forget to drink water and take care of yourselves! Hope to see you soon! ˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

[iouinotes]

Heartbeat | Seth Cohen

pairing: Seth Cohen x female!reader

show: o.c California

warnings: kissing, arguments,

summary: Seth is your best friend and he's trying everything to win Summer's heart. You on the other hand would do anything to win his heart and make it beat for you.

author's note: I'm probably the last person on earth who hasn't watched this series. But hey, new potential for ff. By the way, please tell me I'm not the only one who thinks his voice sounds like Dylan O'Briens...

The way I love him is like the waves on the open sea on a beautiful day.

While the sun shines on my skin and my bikini slips slightly, revealing my sun-kissed skin, I try to secretly look at him.

The way his brown curls are wet from the blue sea or how his muscles tense as he pulls his shirt over his head.

I hear a sigh of relief escape from his mouth and have to giggle to keep myself from laughing at his swimming trunks.

Showing one of his cartoon characters, red and dark tones that highlight his pale skin even more.

And when he turns his head and smiles at me, relaxed in a way, as if there were only the two of us in the whole world, he has never looked more beautiful to me.

"Are you daydreaming, sunshine?" Oh, his teasing voice and that look in his eyes- what wouldn't I give to finally have him for myself.

"You'd like to know, Cohen." I grin slightly at him as I answer him. His raised eyebrows and the heat around us make my head spin.

"Okay, let me guess. Are you thinking about the party tonight at my parents' house and what you want to wear?" For a moment he looks out to the sea, reassuring himself that we are safe, until he finally lies down next to me with his arms outstretched above his head.

Rolling my eyes, I quickly answer him.

"Girls don't just think about parties and dresses, idiot." His brown eyes, which are now looking at me invitingly, make the butterflies fly around in my stomach.

"But was I right?" When I try to turn his head away with my hand, he holds mine tightly. But immediately afterwards he strokes my skin tenderly and my thoughts need a moment to sort themselves out.

"Whatever. And just because you started it, I'm going to wear my new blue dress. The one I brought to your room earlier, remember?" The triumphant smile on his face is worth every single word.

For a few seconds, all I can hear is the cries of the seagulls and the sound of the waves. I'm almost starting to doze off when his voice rings out again.

But this time my joy is dampened by his next sentence.

"Today is the day, you know? I'm pretty sure Summer will at least remember my first name by the end of the night." The sinking of my heart feels almost too painful to answer to him.

What else did I expect? Summer has been on his mind for years, every minute of the day since he first saw her.

Seth, on the other hand, has been in my heart since the first time we met. On a rainy day at a skate park, while I was just lost and he was practicing his tricks.

To this day, I can remember the moment when his brown eyes became the most beautiful sight in the world for me.

Nothing has changed ever since.

"Yeah, sure." It's always the same. His never-ending crush on her, the ever-growing hope that is destroyed with each and every one of her withering glances. The dejection in his eyes, as if his happiness would melt away as soon as she was near him.

I can never do anything about it. Because no matter how many times she ignores him or puts him down, her attention is the spark in his heart that never extinguishes.

Because what can I do? Summer is pretty, sassy and popular in our social circle. She makes every boy weak in the knees, worshiping her even though she never shows serious interest.

Seth is blind to it too, he just wants her attention. That she remembers how his name is.

I know his name. His favorite comics. His hatred towards bad movies or his nervous habit of talking endlessly without it making actual sense. I know his sarcasm, his heartbreaks, and his commitment to dreams.

But that doesn't seem to be enough. Because when he looks at her, he sees the sun. I, on the other hand, am a small star that doesn't shine bright enough to be noticed.

So as we fall into silence and I try to suppress my sadness about my unrequited love, he hums softly next to me.

🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊

When we return from our little trip at sea, the sun is almost setting. My gaze falls to the floor and as I listen to his excited voice, I wonder how it would feel to hold his hand.

As we walk up the stairs to his room and I greet his father as I pass, I recognize the look in his eyes as he opens the door for me.

"Oh come on Seth. It can't be healthy for you to think about her for every free second of your day." With a sigh, he throws himself onto his bed with his back showing to me.

"I just wonder why she doesn't see my potential. I would be a great boyfriend."

Yes, for me.

"That's probably because you follow her around like a lost puppy. Compared to the water polo guys, that's a drastic difference."

When I carefully take my dress down from his door that I hung there a few hours ago, his eyes clouded with pity follow me.

A little ritual for us before every big celebration. Getting ready together, like boyfriend and girlfriend. But I immediately push the thought away.

"But everyone likes puppies. At some point she'll look at me and realize that we would make a great couple." Shaking my head, I pat him on the shoulder.

"Everyone has their dreams, Cohen." I meet his gaze as he thoughtfully glances back at me, suddenly meeting my eyes with a newfound interest.

"What are you dreaming about?" The curiosity in his my voice makes me smile.

"Well, it may be a bit cheesy but I wish for… a person." At my words his eyebrows raise and as he sits up straight, I suddenly feel constricted.

"One person for...what? Carrying your bags while you're shopping? I'm already in charge of that." Laughing, I tuck a strand of hair behind my ear.

"I didn't mean that. Even though that's nice, no argument there. No, I mean a person with whom I can experience my first times. You know, the first date, the first romantic kiss. The first vacation shared together...the first time sleeping together, feeling each others heartbeates. That's what I dream of."

As I finish my last sentence, I look at his face. See his rude stare and his open mouth.

"Wow, I- I didn't know you wanted all this so much." Shrugging my shoulders, I turn around to stroke my blue dress. Trying to hide my heated cheeks.

"It's not going to happen anytime soon anyway, so I guess I'll just have to keep dreaming." The silence that follows is almost painful.

"Nevermind. Also, we only have an hour left to get ready. We'd better hurry." He roles his eyes at my attempt to change the subject.

"You say that every time and you always beg me for another five minutes at the end." As I take off my sandals, he narrowly avoids a pair I throw at him.

"Be quiet, Cohen."

🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊

Kirsten had outdone herself. The decorations, the guest list, the food selection. It was all perfection.

As I look out the window of Seth's room, I repeatedly brush a strand of hair out of my face. My heart beats faster with each passing second of silence and I feel my cheeks turning pink as Seth comes out of the bathroom.

The black suit, a red tie and the neat curls. This view is even more perfect than the one outside.

You'd think I'd be able to hide my attraction to him better by now, but when I audibly catch my breath, he looks at me critically.

"What? Does that scream my-mother-picked-out-my-wardrobe too much?" The crooked grin on his face makes me think dramatically long about my answer.

"Everyone knows you're a mama's boy, so it won't hurt your aura." The hand that comes to his chest as he sucks in air makes me giggle.

"Damn, that was mean. But do you think Summer likes mama's boys?" As soon as he says her name, it’s sounding like a prayer from his lips, I try not to show my disappointment on my face.

"Seth-" I sigh, trying to pull myself together. After all, he's still my best friend and I don't want to hurt his feelings. Even if it means hurting my own.

"What?" Innocence swims in his eyes and again, I wish I could tell him the truth. Instead, I continue to play matchmaker.

"I know best how much you want to impress her. But please trust me when I tell you that it always brings bad luck when one person loves their partner more. There has to be a balance." But my words don't seem to have any effect.

"I will bring balance to the force-" The laughter that escapes from his throat makes me shrug my shoulders a little more relaxed now. He knows he got me, when I can’t seem to stop smiling.

"Nerd. Come on, Skywalker, it's time we both show up at the party." Nodding, he closes the door and as we step out onto the bright terrace with the sun shining on us, I feel peaceful.

Unfortunately, the feeling only lasts two hours. Or more precisely, until Summer, the beautiful, graceful, mean Summer, enters the Cohens' house.

Since that moment, I have had an overexcited, confused, useless boy next to me who can't stop embarrassing himself.

"Do you think I should get her something to drink-" I interrupt his speech for the first time in three hours.

"If you don't stop this right now, I swear I'll never ever surprise you with comic books again." The threat actually makes him close his mouth.

"Why are you in such a bad mood? Do you need a drink?" If he hadn't said it so sarcastically, I would have found the question sweet.

"Seth, I can handle a lot of things in our friendship. Your never-ending sarcasm, your inappropriate jokes or your ability to always say the wrong thing to people. Hell, I can even deal with your love for cartoon characters and your obsession with video games on a daily basis. But talking about Summer every second of the day, twenty-four hours a week? That has reached my limit."

While I try to keep my voice low, the confusion is written all over his handsome face.

"But who else should I share my despair with? You're the only one who's really interested in what I have to say." His words hurt a part of my heart that I cannot describe.

"Exactly. I'm interested in you. Not how pretty Summer looks or what Summer just said, did, or might do in the future." For the first time that evening, he actually seems to understand what I'm talking about.

"So...change of subject?" Relieved, I have to start smiling lightly.

"Yes, please." As we smile at each other at that moment, it feels, for once, like I have his full attention.

🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊

As soon as I open the door to the ladies' room, I wish I could immediately turn around and leave.

In front of the mirror, her face looks at me skeptically.

I try to act like she doesn't bother me, even though there are so many things I'd like to say to her.

"Aren't you that girl who's always with Steven?" I look at her, clearly confused.

Rolling her eyes, she continues. "The nerd with the brown curls, his parents own the house, I heard."

"His name is Seth." She shrugs and applies her lip gloss. Her eyes alternately focus on me and the mirror in front of her.

"Whatever. Are you together?" I feel heat rushing to my face and as I try to answer relaxed, she seems to see right through me.

"What- together? No- we're friends. Just friends." As she turns to me now, she raises her eyebrows almost disinterestedly.

"Really? Then why are you looking at him like you're in love with him?" I turn away from her curious stare and try my best not to let my nervousness show.

"You must be mistaken. He's my best friend." As she stands two steps ahead of me, I don't know what to say.

"That doesn't mean you don't have feelings for him. What about him?" Sighing, I can't try to deny it any longer.

"He doesn't." When I see compassion in her eyes, I start to like her a little.

"Then change that. He's just a boy. Show him what he's missing out on. A little skin showing, a few compliments. He won't realize what's happening until he's begging you to let him kiss you." I look at her, laughing, and for a moment I dare to dream.

"What if he likes someone else? How can I keep up?" With elegant steps she walks past me and opens the door.

"Then you have no choice but to outdo her."

When the door closes, I am left alone with my thoughts.

🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊

As Seth loosens his tie, I am still deep in thought.

After my conversation with Summer, the party was over quicker than expected. Seth and I watched some of the guests, joked about the age difference, had two glasses of expensive wine and had the time of our lives.

All without talking about Summer again.

Now that I'm here in his room and we're getting ready for bed, I'm unsure about my next steps.

I usually sleep on his bed while he puts his mattress on the floor. Since we were little, this has been our approach to spend the night together.

However, tonight I want it to be different.

As I remove the clips from my hair and the makeup from my face, Seth talks incessantly about the latest Legion comic.

It's reassuring to listen to him like this while I think about my next steps.

We usually change separately, there's just a certain intimacy in being so open and showing yourself in your underwear.

But Summer said I have to go for it. Why do I listen to her? I don't know to be honest. I just think I should seize this moment of courage.

So I stand up and breathe in gently, trying to behave as inconspicuously as possible.

I slowly take off my dress and as it falls to the floor, Seth's head turns in confusion towards the noise.

"What have you dropped now- oh" I can literally see his eyes double in amazement and he almost chokes on his words in surprise.

I have to smile when I notice how he can't stop looking at me in my lace underwear.

1:0 for me.

"Are you still breathing, Cohen?" When I see him swallow, I turn my back to him. His reaction is so intoxicating that it fills me with renewed confidence. As my hair brushes my back, I finally hear his chatter.

"What- yeah- I'm just- I'm fine- are you fine? Has it gotten warmer in here? Are you warm? It seems so, otherwise you wouldn't be undressing in here. God, no girl has ever undressed in front of me." Laughing, I pick up one of his shirts with the stupidest designs, but there's still nothing I'd rather wear.

When I put it on, it covers me down to my knees and as soon as I turn around, I meet his gaze.

"We're not nine anymore, Seth. I think our friendship can handle us changing in front of each other." As I walk towards him, his gaze wanders along my legs.

"Er- sure. Of course, no problem. I- what?" My fingers slowly stroke his shirt, carefully grasping his tie as I begin to untie it completely.

"Do you think we can go to sea again tomorrow? This time we are not under any time pressure." I feel him stiffen slightly under my touch as he tries his best to stay cool. Well, as cool as Seth Cohen can be.

"Sure- maybe around one o'clock? Ryan is probably doing something with Marissa anyway. Doing god knows what- wait. I shouldn’t say his holy name out loud, when they are doing certain rather unholy stuff. Why am I saying this? I just mean, that we can both sleep in, I guess. And we can stay awake a little longer tonight." When his tie finally comes completely loose, I gently place my hands on his chest.

I meet his gaze as I raise my head, now so close to him. Our faces are only inches apart. I can see the brown in his eyes and the blush that adorns his face as he stops rambling.

"Yeah? What do you want to do?" Maybe this is the moment he finally realizes that Summer isn't the only one who exists in this world.

Maybe he'll finally notice me now.

"Teach me how to flirt?"

Did the world just stop turning? Or is it just my heartbeat that has stopped? Just with his words, just with the way he looks at me.

As if he no longer wanted to shy away from this tension between us.

"Flirting is an art, Cohen. I don't know if you're capable of pulling it off." His subsequent eye roll and the hand that he places pleadingly around my own make me reconsider my next actions.

At least now I can finally reveal my affection to him.

"Please, I'll go shopping with you. Even to the men's department so you can pick out my clothes. Just teach me." Surprisingly, I pause at his words.

"Even if I put sweatpants on you?" His face twists slightly.

"Yes, even if I have to wear sweatpants." I smile, brushing my hair back. As my eyes focus on his figure, a thousand thoughts race through my head.

"Okay. First step: your posture. I know how much you like to dramatically gesticulate your sentences with your hands, but you should avoid that when you're trying to flirt. You have to stay cool, confident. But still polite, not as if you don't care about the answer." Nodding, he listens attentively to each of my words, trying to understand the intention behind them.

"Like this?" I see him put his hands behind his back and stand there stiffly, his curious look ever present in his eyes.

I laugh and shake my head. "Not quite. Here, I'll show you." My hands move to his own ones, pulling them forward. Slowly I stroke his knuckles, but when I notice his opening mouth at my gentle touch, I let them go.

"Put them in your pockets. Stand up straight, but don't try to force it. Just relax." When he puts his hands in his pockets and stands with his foot slightly at an angle, he looks so carefree for a moment that I almost fall for the trick myself.

"Convincing enough?" Nodding, I try not to let the sight burn too much into my memory.

"Keep that up. Next important step. Your language, the way you speak. If you're going to flirt, it has to be seductive. You have to make me hang on every word that comes out of your mouth." As if I don't already do that.

As his eyebrows draw together, I see the confusion in his pupils and sighing, I speak up again.

"Try talking to me." I wait invitingly for his next move.

"Hey, uh what's going on?" When he doesn’t speak any further, I intervene.

"Okay, maybe I should show you how to do it first. Firstly, you need to try to initiate a conversation." I take a quick breath and try to relax my shoulders to prepare myself.

As I wrap my fingers around his collar and slowly stroke down his shirt, I see him swallow.

"Did you enjoy the party?" I try to maintain eye contact with him while keeping my voice a little quieter and giving more meaning to my words. I can literally see the gears turning in his head.

"I-I did?" When he stops speaking, I put my hand on his chest, circling the pattern of his shirt.

"Don't you want to ask me what I liked the most?" I see how he closes his mouth, trying to find the right words, as if he suddenly doesn't know how to talk to me normally anymore.

"What did you like best?" I smile sweetly, slowly sliding my fingers into his neck and playing with his brown curls.

My heart beats louder than ever, when I notice the expression on his face as I caress his hair softly.

"You."

It is this one moment when the world makes sense. When the eternal waiting, the torment of the last few years and the stupid boy in front of me finally makes sense.

Because his eyes wander to my lips and I feel his breath across my face as our bodies are drawn to each other like magic.

His lips almost brush mine, we are so close together that my mind is unable to think of anything other than his touch.

What it would be like to kiss him.

"Is this still part of the lesson?" His breathless voice makes me smile.

"Well, do you want it to end?" I have to laugh at his lips as he quickly shakes his head.

"What-what should I do?" I stand slightly on my tiptoes so I can whisper in his ear.

"What every princess wants from her fairytale prince. Kiss me."

He leans slowly into my touch. With every breath he takes, I can feel his arms sliding around my waist as his curls brush my forehead. He licks his lips uncertainly and when I look into his eyes, full of affection and the desire to kiss me, I fall in love with him even more.

"You don't know how long I've been waiting for this." Confusion adorns his features and I try not to let my strong heartbeat distract me too much when I finally tell him the truth.

"Waiting for what? Me?" Laughing, I close my eyes for a moment, reveling in the feeling of his closeness.

"It's always been you for me, Seth. When I said, "You're unbearable"? In my head, I wanted to spend every second I'm in this world with you. Or when I always roll my eyes when you stumble over your words, as if you're afraid it would bore me too much and I would stop listening to you. Because I would never do that. God, I practically hang on every word that comes out of your mouth."

As astonishment takes over his gaze, I feel a blush creep over my skin. What do I have to lose now?

When he answers, a loving smile adorns his face, coupled with a brief shake of the head.

"So I was unconsciously flirting with you the whole time? You know, step two?"

"You don't have to flirt with me for me to fall for you, Cohen. I fell already, hard."

His eyebrows rise, his nervousness changes almost abruptly to a smug expression.

"Is that so? Even though I talk about Captain Oats for two hours, when I was telling you his story from my childhood?"

"Why do you think I'm still here? No one would listen to that, not even me, if I hadn't been thinking about how good you looked in your sweater."

"Very shameless of you, Captain Oats would be disappointed by your little interest in his life."

"And would Seth Cohen be disappointed if I'm too interested in his life to pay attention to anything else?" Grinning, he pulls me closer to him.

"I'm pretty sure he'd be flattered." His lips hover over mine as his words cast a spell over my mind.

"Then I guess I should do that more often." Slowly, I push him back and let him fall onto his bed while his eyes roam over my body.

"Oh, definitely. You can do anything you want." Smiling sweetly, I move closer to him until I sit down on his lap. His hands find their own way to my thighs, stroking my bare skin.

“I can hear your heartbeat, Cohen. Are you nervous?“ I smile as I tease him, roaming my fingernails over his chest.

“I don’t do nervous. But indeed sunshine, my heartbeat is that noticeable, because you‘re making it beat faster. You‘re making my time on earth feel faster and I would‘t want it any other way.“ Smiling in the kiss, I stretch my hands around his neck.

Being with Seth Cohen isn't always easy, but I guess love isn't either.

[rius-cave]

Idea for an interaction between Luci and Adam

Lucifer: You used to be so kind and happy. So full of life and wonder. What ever happened to you?

Adam, seething: YOU happened to me, damnit! How do you not see that? You STOLE my first wife! You CORRUPTED my second wife with your shitty fuckin APPLE! You condemned all of humanity, all of my descendants, to a life of toil and suffering, all cuz the Big Plan wasn't fucking good enough for you!

And then, you left me! You left US! Left us to deal with the mess that you created! You are the reason for everything that has ever gone wrong in my life! You're the reason I doubted if Cain was my child! You are the reason Cain killed Able! And YOU are the REASON I was alone in Heaven!

Lucifer, looking mortified: W... What was that last part?

Adam, hysterical: You really didn't know?! Oh, what a fucking joke this is! Yeah, they didn't let Eve in because she committed the first sin. But she wasn't bad enough for Hell, so they basically just... Erased her.

*Adam feels his chest*

Adam: But, hey, at least I got my rib back.

Lucifer: Adam, I-

Adam: Able never got into Heaven cuz they hadn't created the Winner system yet. Cain's still wandering the Earth. I'm not allowed to talk to him. Not allowed to tell him that I forgive him, despite how much I hate what he did to his brother, because the angels fear that my forgiveness would undo his curse.

All of my other children, and all of their children, and so on, are just... MIA. The angels don't know what happened to them. Up until the big J-man came about, there were, like, clerical errors or something. They could be in heaven, and just not realize we're related. Or they could have been in hell, and killed in an extermination. I have nothing, Lucifer. My existence is hollow.

Huh! These are some interesting headcanons about the whereabouts of Adam's family! I have to say I haven't thought much about them, cause idk, I have no purpose for them yet personally. But wow, these hit hard. Eve was just erased????? fuckin yikes :(

Cain still wandering the Earth is also really interesting, is he there as like, an immortal human? Is he a ghost lol? Is he just dead but he can't enter Heaven or Hell like... uh... well a ghost i suppose lmao.

To me it would feel like most of Adam's family just doesn't wanna see him anymore, regardless if they're in Heaven or Hell, but them being just... lost is also an interesting possibility.

Also. ouchie. About that whole exchange. No matter how silly of a guy Lucifer is, he is definitely still the Devil and very much responsible for most of humanity's suffering lol

[kaleb-is-definitely-sane]

Okay but am I the only one with a special love for declarations of love that border on religious/sacrilegious?

I mean i just love that “my future husband becoming to me my whole world; and more then the world: almost my hope for heaven. he stood between me and every thought of religion… i could not, in those days, see god for his creature: of whom i had made an idol” "heaven did not seem to be my home and I broke my heart with weeping to come back to earth" "heaven and hell were words to me" "do not swear at all. or, if thou wilt, swear by thy gracious self, which is the god of my idolatry, and I'll believe thee" "he knows himself to be equal to the gods" "that man seems to me to be equal to the gods who is sitting opposite you" "if love is a religion, i'll worship you morning and evening" "i love you so much my heart names you after gods" "she's a goddess. my muse, my lover - i worship her devotedly and sacrifices daily and she loves me back with a savage barbarism only the greek goddesses could" "she's a myth, she's a legend. one look at her is sure to lock you out of heaven" "i want to devour you. you want to devour me. so let's consume each other. it's communion - though it sure doesn't look like church" "in the crooks of your body i find my religion" "if the heavens ever did speak, she's the last true mouthpiece" "we were like gods at the dawning of the world, & our joy was so bright we could see nothing else but the other" "my love is not idolatrous, okay? that’s bullshit. it’s not. i’m just saying it’s theological perfection, that’s all. like the Holy Trinity, but a hundred times better" "take me to church: i'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies. i'll tell you my sins, and you can sharpen your knife. offer me that deathless death. oh good God, let me give you my life" "you built me palaces out of paragraphs. you built cathedrals" "women were to me a cathedral. beautiful and religious even. their ability to make worshipers… worth writing a poem for" "i would have come out of eden to open the door for you if i had known you were there" "i slithered out from eden just to outside your door" "my church offers no absolutes; she tells me, 'worship in the bedroom.' the only heaven I'll be sent to is when I'm alone with you" "and if the devil were to see you he would kiss your eyes and repent" "love, for you, is larger than the usual romantic love. it's like religion. it's terrifying" "i wanted to know what I looked like to you. a sin committed and a prayer answered, you said" "she'll give you all your desires but her demands are sacrificial" "there is no sweeter innocence than our gentle sin" "he thought her body gave him his first name. he thought her thighs could tell him who he was. he thought lust and love had the same hands" "it's more then love she feels for him... it's more like worship" "to fall in love is to create a religion that has a fallible god" "unholy. killer of men. makes you wonder how much longer till you give in" "if my love is blasphemous, then may i burn i hell" "her beauty is so great that heaven is flawed for the lack of her" "if I'm a pagan of the good times, my lover's the sunlight. to keep the goddess on my side, she demands a sacrifice" "i would put off meeting god in paradise, to meet you one last time" "she is heaven's light" "she is hellfire" "you remember church as a boy. the fear and the passion. that's what she makes me feel" "when he leaves the room, he bows and acts precisely as if he were before a shrine" "we are one person in two bodies" "i am not whole without you" "i need my other half. you are me, and i am you" "o that it were not in religion sin to make our love a god, and worship it" "unable are the loved to die for love is immortality, nay it is deity - unable they that love to die for love reforms vitality into divinity" kind of love

[cuteniarose]

Personally I find it absolutely hilarious that when it comes to LoK villains, my opinion of them can be summed up more or less like this:

Vaatu? The skrunkliest skrunkly!! I adore him, he deserved so much better. Wasted potential to the max, even the creators contradict themselves when it comes to him. Spirits can’t be evil, and yet a spirit is the ultimate evil?? Raava and Vaatu represent Ying and Yang, a.k.a the natural balance of all things, and yet it’s okay for Vaatu to be destroyed and/or locked away for an immeasurable amount of time??? Okay, sure Bryke, sure. I can name at least two people (@katkastrofa and @shadelorde) who would handle that story arc much, much better with a grand total budget of 0

The Red Lotus? THE ULTIMATE BLORBOS!!! Took up residence in my head almost 6 years ago and have refused to leave ever since. Every fandom related thing I indulge in is at least somewhat related to them. Actually had a point but the creators realised they couldn't show the bad guys having a point so suddenly we go from wanting to make the world a better place for the lower classes to genocide and torturing a teenager. Because that's what anarchism is, duh. And also they will all die horrific on-screen deaths at the end which may or may not have traumatised 12yo Nia so much they cannot even think of the Book 3 finale without having a panic attack. Can I sue Bryke for emotional damages??

Kuvira? My poor little meow meow who I will defend from the world. Yet another victim of Bryke realising stabilizing the Earth Kingdom and taking back colonized land was in fact a noble and righteous goal, and we can't have that, so let's make her a totalitarian dictator trying to create an ethnostate, commiting ecoterrorism and sending people to fucking concentration camps. Because that makes all the bloody sense. I would straight up fight every last Beifong for her and not because she's hot, I'm aroace I don't care what she looks like, but because if I was told that I'm part of a family only for then to be excluded from the family portrait and called a stray dog that nobody wanted I too would rip a hole in space and time

Amon and Tarrlok? Well..... they sure do exist ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[silvysartfulness]

Hi. I don't think we've ever communicated before, but a very long time ago when I was still a teenager I searched the internet for Ocarina of Time fanart and found your old site, silvestris.net

I thought your art was beautiful, and printed some of the pictures out to decorate my room with. I read your fanfics about Kopi Rezo, and sought out the Slayers anime to watch it for myself.

A whole heck of a lot of stuff has happened since then, in my life and in the world, but I randomly thought of your old work a few minutes ago, and after clicking through the old site's links found your tumblr just now.

I wanted you to know that your art and writing touched me at a formative period in my life, and that even though a lot of the old gallery is inaccessible now, I can still see some of your drawings in my mind, committed to long term memory.

I never got very good at drawing, though I'll still do it for fun sometimes, but I've been writing fanfiction for a long time now, and if I'm willing to flatter myself I'd say I've gotten fairly decent at it. Even done some original stories.

I wanted you to know, one creator to another, that you inspired me. That you left such an impression that even after all this time I remember you. I tell you this not because I expect you to feel any type of way about some stranger you never met, but because in these times where a lot of artists are wondering what the point even is when their work is so undervalued, that I think it would mean a lot to me if someone ever said words to this effect about the things I've created.

Thank you for adding beauty and wonder to my life. I hope you've been well all these years and found creative fulfillment in your endeavors, and security and happiness in your personal life.

With love, a fan.

I've just been coming back to this message several times over the last few days, rereading it, tearing up a bit, and repeatedly failing to think of a good way to answer.

So in all inadequacy: THANK YOU so much for your kind words, anon!

I am very, very flattered and honoured to have been able to provide inspiration, adding beauty and wonder to a stranger's life. That is the most worthwhile legacy I can imagine leaving as proof of having existed on this earth for a while. 💚

Thank you so much yet again for your kind words, and I wish you all the best of luck with all your creative endeavours in the future!

[artemisravencourtney]

Klaroline WIP Wednesday: Those Violent Eyes Ch5

(Klaroline peeps please tell me if I'm doing this wrong, it's my first time trying WIP Wed)

TW: Very brief mentions of past SA

He muses out loud, more so to himself than Stefan, “We could imprison him? I happen to have some options beneath the manor that should do nicely for now.” “Imprison him until when? He’s obsessed with Katherine, he won’t just give up on the idea.” Klaus waves a hand, “Until it’s appropriate to kill him.” He says flippantly. “Weeks, decades, centuries, who knows?” He shoots Stefan a pointed look, then, “Your brother’s days are numbered, ripper. He lives because I allow him to, but I will tire of that eventually.” Comprehension dawns on Stefan’s face, and the hybrid realizes he’s given too much away. “Because of Caroline. You’re keeping him alive until she gives you permission to kill him.” It’s not entirely the truth, but too close for comfort, regardless. Stefan smiles then, tone friendly, “You like her.” He’s brought back to his upbringing, and Mikael’s wicked glee whenever he’d find a weakness in his least favorite son. His ‘father’ could poke at anything that touched a nerve until the words hurt almost as much as the blows, all without ever losing that hint of sadistic pleasure that came with causing his distress. Klaus won’t allow Caroline to be poked at. “Your brother is a rapist.” He says slowly, “I don’t have to like her to want him dead.” Stefan only smiles wider, eyes sparkling in amusement. “No, but you’d have to at least respect her to wait for her permission to kill him.” He raises an eyebrow at that, “Your bar for what constitutes as respect is pitifully low.” The ripper shrugs, allowing him to relax slightly (though he suspects they will be revisiting this conversation at a later date). “Maybe. Anyway, we can imprison Damon until you kill him, but that might raise some questions. He’s friends with the town Sheriff, they have lunch together every week.” He pauses, noting the scowl on Klaus’s face with a healthy degree of trepidation, “If he goes missing, she’ll catch on.” Klaus Mikaelson is not a good man. He will be the first to admit that. Not with pride, but not with shame either. It’s an intrinsic truth, one his mother knew long before he did, one that he stopped trying to outrun the day his Wolf was bound. Klaus is objectively a terrible person, a questionable brother, and a monster among monsters. He murdered his own mother, for crying out loud. But the very thought of befriending a woman like the sheriff, laughing with her while committing unspeakable crimes towards her beloved daughter in the shadows? Pretending to be her ally, while you destroy the one person most dear to her on this earth, and ensure she’s none the wiser? All for no apparent benefit, aside from blood and your own twisted amusement? Klaus is not a good man. But there exist evils he isn’t capable of. Something snaps inside of him, dark and foreboding. “You wouldn’t happen to mean Sheriff Elizabeth Forbes, would you?” At Stefan’s answering nod, he feels a startling clarity wash over him. There’s no seeing red, no fiery hatred, no bloodlust. Instead, he feels swept underwater, awash with a bone-deep chill the likes of which he hasn’t felt since his last winter as a human. Idly, he wonders if this icy, detached thirst for vengeance weaving its way through him is what Elijah feels on a daily basis. He’s always been the hot-headed, mercurial one of his siblings, and he prefers it that way, but perhaps there’s something to be said about this cold, calculating fury. “Change of plans, then. I have a much better idea.” He unlocks his phone again, scrolling to another contact, “You might want to book a hotel for tonight, preferably under a different name”, he says, typing away. Stefan says something in response, but the sound is garbled and far away as he hits send.

[licncourt]

hi!!! i'm new to tvc and your blog so im not sure if this has been done yet but :'D i just wanted to ask your thoughts on akasha, even generally speaking? thanks!

Welcome!!! I have lots of thoughts on Akasha, but mainly I think her existence tells us a lot about the author and provides a lot of context for how AR approaches female characters in the series overall. I think Akasha, Claudia, and Gabrielle are a very succinct look at how Anne viewed women and the archetypes she felt existed within womanhood. Akasha is really the final boss of anti-feminist strawmen, written to be the ultimate evil and Bad Woman, but she just kind of ends up being an almost-compelling female character instead.

I think Gabrielle has strong elements of that, but the fact that she was so heavily inspired by AR's mother softens the narrative to her some despite the bitterness there. Akasha is something else though, and the narrative on a meta level does not seem to feel sympathy for her.

AR obviously had a very complicated relationship with her own womanhood and a virtually unshakable "not like other girls" mentality her entire life. It was some truly breathtaking internalized misogyny or maybe even a case of gender dysphoria that turned toxic. I doubt we'll ever know for sure, but that loathing she seemed to feel towards womanhood is very much on display in QotD.

Looking at the book as a female reader, I can't help but feel sorry for Akasha on some fundamental level despite the absolute evil she also commits. She was a queen, but doomed to be subservient to her husband on the basis of gender. Then, through some incredible accident, she's suddenly the most powerful human being there's even been, only to then be tortured and spend thousands of years internally conscious but unable to move, speak, or do anything at all.

It's almost an Eve story, a woman who is designed to be a man's inferior who instead seized knowledge and power (and the narrative), gained autonomy from and influence over her male counterpart, and then was punished for it by the larger forces at play. In some ways she reminds me of Claudia too, driven insane by her circumstances and unable to comprehend her own monstrosity, but she's also more evil than Claudia was ever capable of being due to her age (torturing and ordering the rape of of Maharet and Mekare, forcibly turning Khayman, etc).

If Anne had left it at that and changed her goals to be less grandiose, I think her character would have read better and been a more complex and convincing villain in the evil-but-a-victim-of-circumstance way that so many VC vampires are. That's one of my favorite things about the original VC vampires that was present in Akasha but not executed with quite enough finesse. Instead, I think Anne takes it way too far into cartoonish hatred for feminist stereotypes.

For most authors I wouldn't feel confident saying that was the intention but AR, if nothing else, aggressively involves her personal feelings and beliefs in her work, often to the detriment of the story. VC is just the fictionalized inside of her head and we know that. Combined with her other female characters and her own public statements, it's hard not to eye roll at the climax of QotD when Akasha decides she's going to kill 90% of human men and turn the Earth into a new Eden with her as the goddess for the human women (and male human chattel).

In that sense of her character, it seems like foreshadowing to Blood Canticle Lestat reprimanding the audience directly, just Anne finding something to be irrationally angry about and writing it into her book. I've said before that QotD is a step below IWTV and TVL because the cracks in her writing really start to drag the book down like they would for the rest of the series to a rather extreme degree. Knowing this was her last book with an editor, I'm curious how much of the overall readability of the book can be attributed to that/how far gone Anne already was at this point.

In spite of all that, it is kind of fun to go balls to the wall and take a Hell Yeah Get Them mentality when Akasha goes scorched earth because despite it all, it's sort of cathartic to watch a overpowered female vampire go on the warpath and scream all the deepest frustrations with patriarchy that many women struggle with. At the same time, it's hard to fully enjoy it knowing authorial intent (and reading it all within the context of the sexual violence Akasha perpetrated with Anne's usual lack of nuance). That's kind of par for the course though, most things in VC are Almost Good and that's what keeps us on the hook.

[primeofprimes115]

Moral Compass - Supergirl x Male Reader

Trigger Warning: Mentions of PTSD, Anxiety and Medication, you've been warned if you're not into soldier types of fics.

Art by: Kyomusha on DeviantArt

He's doing it again...

Y/N found himself staring into space, with only just his thoughts, staring down at the Earth... Why did he think about coming up here again?

He didn't know... His thoughts clouded his mind to even focus on the reason, he supposed seeing the view kept him calm, kept him... Stable in a way.

After all... He bared scars that would never heal physically, he was 18 when the war broke out... And now? 26 years old? He found himself here... At the Watchtower... Staring down at the Earth from the windowed view... All by himself.

His leg began to shake, by itself at least, he looked down at his right shaking leg and as much as he tried to stop... He couldn't... He sighed at himself and kept looking on at the view instead, knowing he'd stop shaking.

He was jaded... Too jaded at this current moment, he had learned that his mother had passed and it didn't help with how he was feeling...

He survived one war... He wasn't sure if he was going to-

Footsteps were heard, entering into the room, boots connected to the ground as a cape swayed left and right when she walked, her hair gloriously waving around when she took steps in between.

Y/N took a moment to look at who it was and to his surprise... It was his moral compass, the only person he had left, the one person that understood him and stayed by his side...

Kara Zor-El... Formally known as Supergirl, now? She's Superwoman, dressed in a full body suit with pants, her famous golden V-shaped belt and high knee boots with a golden V that served as the outlines on the top. Her hair was a little shorter now but she hadn't changed all to much...

It was Y/N who changed much to her horror...

He was once this... Sunshine out-bursting ray of fun and excitement when Kara first met him...

Now? He'd changed since she had last seen him for good, he was now scrawny, paranoid, shaky and jaded... He had fought a war he never thought he'd come back from, he was lucky to be alive.

Y/N's shaking suddenly began to dim down once Superwoman had entered the room, she offered him a sympathetic smile.

"Kara..." he lowly whispered her name, she sat down beside him and looked him in the eyes.

"I'm here" she replied to him softly, wrapping her arms over him to comfort him, she rocked him side to side slightly, as he burrowed himself into her body, feeling her warmness. Superwoman leaned in and kissed his head, a little smile crept up his face soon after. Both were in a committed, romantic relationship for the past month and a half, Y/N was Kara's and Superwoman's boyfriend and she was his girlfriend and moral compass, someone to guide him through the dark.

For the past few months... Kara had been by Y/N's side, helping him recover to an extent, making sure he's taking care of himself properly and often stayed over to make sure he wouldn't do something stupid, she loved him so much that she wouldn't let anything or anyone hurt him, this was a man who she once had a liking for when she was young, when she was Supergirl...

Ever since he returned... Kara was the first person that recognized him outside of family, the only person he had known as a friend back then was her.

At first? It seemed like things were normal... But there was something Y/N hid from her and that was his trauma, he had severe anxiety and any loud noises that resulted with a bang would trigger him, often he'd freeze into place or he'd duck, his fight or flight response would kick in.

He remembered being laughed at when it happened and it did nothing but irritate him, resulting in a violent confrontation, before Superwoman got involved, she had heard everything that time and defended Y/N, knowing about his trauma, she knew something was wrong and by then? She vowed to stick with him, she didn't care if he protested against it, she made it her objective she'd stick by his side.

And it was not a decision she regretted...

"How was work?" Kara cooed softly, looking down at him, he had laid down on the chairs and rested his head on her, a sofa that was placed there when Y/N said the view down to Earth kept him calm, it was quiet, peaceful... Something he needed and she delivered.

"It was alright" he replied softly, Kara gently drove her thumb in circles around his hair. "Mr White isn't at bad as I thought he'd be" he worked as a Janitor at the Daily Planet, Kara had pulled some strings to get him a job there where he could also be looked after too by her cousin and his wife, something light to also keep him a little busy too. "Could've gone better...".

Kara sensed his tone lowering, judging from the recent events that has occurred, she only wished she could do so much else to make it even better. She looked at him with sympathy.

"But at least I have you to make it better at the end of the day" he added one more say into his sentence, looking up at her by turning himself to face up at the woman's eyes, he could see the ocean in her own eyes.

Kara smiled brightly with a soft demeanor, before leaning herself down to gently leave a kiss on his lips, pulling back after a moment.

A few days ago, Y/N brought up that he wouldn't be good enough for her, that he was a mess, he wasn't really completely honest with himself that he was ready to start a relationship with her, he just wanted to let her know that he loved her, Kara had denied that he was a mess completely, she was helping him get better, being his moral compass, this wasn't Superwoman talking...

This was Kara Danvers talking...

He had rarely smiled often, only times he smiled was when Kara would comfort him, stick by him, tell him he isn't whatever he called to put himself in the down-low.

And now she sees him smiling a little up at her again, it made her heart flutter each time she'd see him smile and it's all that mattered the most to her... To see him smile.

"I've been dreading to see your smile all day" she sighed happily. "Missed it so much".

"You think so?" he asked her, wondering why his smile was something she'd dread for, Kara noted his ironic question, and lightly giggled.

"Yes... I always want to see you smile, even if I have to tickle you to see it" she playfully told him, resulting in him looking a little scared.

"Please don't" he begged.

"I'm not! Trust me" she giggled, leaning in to kiss him once again. "I love you".

"I love you too" he quietly responded, Kara heard him and smiled before the pair looked at the view ahead, the blue hue of Earth shined through the Watchtower's window within the room they were currently in.

Both left alone with no one else but each other, Kara's thumb ran in circles in his hair, as he basked in Kara's warm touch, his heartbeat beating in a calm rhythm to the sound of Kara's hearing, it was a soft, fleeting noise, knowing he's calm and collected.

Superwoman had always wanted to show Y/N this view from space, from above the Earth itself, looking down at the planet with such an amazing view, where it was all quiet, she used to always fly up above the planet to float there and listen for anything peaceful... Even just to think to herself for a moment.

But when Y/N left to be a soldier? It took her so much not to pull him out there, it took her a lot of convincing from her cousin that they couldn't solve the world's problems for them, even conflict that results in war in such ways, or they'd be viewed us something else entirely than heroes that lift up spirits and hopes and dreams.

It took a lot of convincing, she remembered crying once or twice thinking about Y/N, thinking he wouldn't come back, but he eventually did years later, seeing that he was a completely different person now...

Jaded, traumatized... And people called him a hero...

He never called himself a hero... Not once, he killed people, he watched people die in front of him...

His friends who were there, all had died and he lived... Some were injured and honorably discharged, but not once did he get injured like they did, he was lucky...

But in that luck? Came his trauma, his anxiety...

He lashed out at those who called him a hero, much to their disbelief, they never knew what he saw, he wondered how they'd feel if they saw what he saw and witnessed... Would they be calling themselves a hero??

A hero is someone like Superman, who fights in the name of Truth and Justice, fighting for a better tomorrow and keeps Earth safe from harm with his allies and the Justice League...

Or at least back then...

Now a new Justice League is ran by the likes of Nightwing, Queen Nubia of the Amazons, Wally West aka The Flash, Green Lantern aka John Stewart, Hawkwoman and finally... Superwoman herself as the front of center. Calling themselves the Justice League of Tomorrow, the JLT.

Though Y/N was happy to see Kara again that time... Much change had happened that it seemed to overwhelm him sooner than later, and Kara had stayed with him that entire week due to this, although Superwoman would be needed to save the day every now and then...

"Did you take your medication this morning?" Kara asked, knowing she wasn't around to make sure he did since she trusted him to take it when she wasn't around, since Superwoman was needed.

"I did" he nodded. "Why?" he then asked as Kara looked down at him to scan his face.

"Just asking, I know what you're like" she knew he wasn't lying this time around, she was happy to say at least, proud even. "Remember, therapist on Thursday morning, I'll be there with you" she cooed at him as he looked up at her next.

"What if... Superwoman is needed?" his eyes were drawn to the S on her suit, the House of El glyph that inspired hope and help, along with compassion to all who seen Superwoman wearing it, even when she was formally Supergirl at the time too.

"Then we can go late, docs sometimes take some time after due time anyway" she told him before kissing his temple. "I'll fly us there too, you love that" she winked next as a smile grew on her face.

"This is why you're the best" he complimented her, a little smile crept up his face for a moment as Kara brightly giggled. "You've always been my Moral Compass, now I see it" he smiled a little more, basking in Kara's warm hands touching his face

"I always have been that Moral Compass for you" she giggled lightly. "But also your superhero girlfriend, it's my right to look after you too, and marry you some day". 

"Isn't that too far ahead?" he asked her, Superwoman thought about it for a minute and maybe... Maybe it was too far ahead to think about marriage right now, they've only been in this relationship for a month and a half.

The Woman of Steel grabbed the edges of her cape and wrapped it slightly to cover Y/N a little, making him a little warmer after a chill went through him. "Maybe... But... You have to admit? I'm not going anywhere, and neither are you" she told him facts, she wasn't going anywhere and neither was he in her eyes, in her grasp and touch...

He was back in her life and that's the closure they both needed, he needed it the most in this dire of time of healing and recovering.

"I suppose so, would be something to look forward to maybe" he nodded a little. "I love you, Kara".

"I love you too, Y/N" and with that, Kara leaned down once more and the pair kissed once again...

* * *

Fin

Word Count: 2118

[sga-owns-my-soul]

🔦favourite sga moment involving mcshep or weir x sheppard

okay well. if there's one thing anyone knows about me it's that i'll ship anything and i'm also mcshep trash so 😅 it's going to be too hard to narrow this down to one moment so you're getting my favourite moments

for shepweir, my absolute favourite moment in the show is in the storm/the eye when kolya says elizabeth is dead and john immediately goes from soldier mindset to genocidal rage and literally does not stop moving and killing until he's told elizabeth is still alive 🥰🥰 we love to see it, i WISH a man loved me enough to commit genocide for me omg actual goals 😍 (although the moment in the tower is also really cute at the end when elizabeth's like they didn't offer you king? and johns like i turned that down too and the little SMIRK SHE GIVES HIM OH MY GOD THEYRE ADORABLE FUCK also in epiphany when she's like ooh i like the beard and he's like it's the first to go when i get home ahhhh it's just. idk it's so domestic and so adorable ugh they're too cute)

also for mcshep, every mcshep moment is a good mcshep moment (and i can make pretty much anything mcshep if i try hard enough) but my favourites come down to:

at the end of hide and seek, when rodney is laying on the floor of the gate room and john rushes down and is the first one at his side but his hands are just fluttering around because he doesn't think he's allowed to touch (or maybe he's too scared to, scared of what he'll show if he gets to touch rodney) it's just sooooooooooo and then john saying he passed out bc he's SO PROUD OF RODNEY FOR BEING SO BRAVE FUCK

also in the defiant one, where rodney is clearly shitting a brick, having seen one of his scientist's dead and one dying, and wanting to go join the fight because he's so scared of john being out there alone and something happening to him. rodney is SO brave and it makes me want to scream and cry and chew on the wall when i think about how many huge changes rodney makes simply just because someone gave him a chance and cared about him

also the whole of millers crossing obviously, the fact that john went back to earth with him and being as worried about jeannie, to john talking a man into killing himself, i mean even rodney asking john for permission (even tho he ends up trying to do it anyways, because that's what john would do- sacrifice himself anyways, and rodney's learned from john) just. the entire episode makes me feral

and last but certainly not least, the shrine. my absolute favourite episode of anything ever, what is, in my opinion, the best piece of media ever created in all of human history. the way rodney loses everything but clings to john so desperately, the way john is the one jeannie turns to for comfort, the way john is breaking in every fucking scene, BEER ON THE PIER, god just literally everything about that episode is so insane to me (and david hewlett went so fucking hard that man deserves every damn award omfg) also kind of unrelated but it's my personal headcanon that rodney was saying i love you to john and not jennifer in that video, rodney was just aware enough to know he couldn't say johns name, but that message was for him 100%

[cellarspider]

29/30 Quit while he's a head

(Previous) | (Index) | (Next)

⛬

We return to a movie that does not know when to stop when it’s behind, Prometheus. Content warning for a random last bit of metaphorically kicking David’s head around like a football.

So, we last left Shaw lying on the ground, fully in the I Can’t mood, which I was actually feeling sympathy for. Let’s see how long that lasts, because David is about to give her a call.

“Dr. Shaw… can you hear me?” “Yes. Yes, I can hear you.” “I was afraid you were dead.” “You have no idea what afraid is.”

Is this just the lashing out of someone who’s emotionally overwhelmed at the moment? Could be! We’ll check back in on that in a minute.

David informs Shaw that they can escape, because there’s more ships. I’m not sure whether this is intended to be a plot twist, because the movie already showed us that there were identical buildings all lined up in this canyon. But nobody ever mentioned them or thought to check them out, so maybe Shaw literally did not ever think of that.

Next thing we know, Shaw has found David, and demands to know where her cross is. “Even after all this,” says David, “you still believe, don’t you?”

Shaw says nothing, because this movie does not appear to have any idea what her faith might mean beyond “believes a thing, cross good, God made Engineers.”

I’m not a religious or spiritual person, and I’m annoyed at how shallow this turned out to be. This movie has an explicitly christian worldview, and yet it doesn’t engage with actual christianity at all. This is bonkers.

David is also of the opinion that Shaw’s plans are similarly inexplicable–David assumes they want to go to Earth.

You know what would’ve made a tense, relatively cheap sequel to this? Have them head towards Earth. Have Shaw repair David, and then realize he plans to use the black goo on humanity. Too late to keep him from gaining control of the ship, you wouldn’t even need a critter to hunt Shaw or whatever, it could be kept as a straight thriller, where she has to figure out a way to stop David.

But no, Shaw wants to go to where the Engineers came from. 

“May I ask what you hope to achieve by going there?”  “They created us. Then they tried to kill us. They changed their minds. I deserve to know why.”  “The answer is irrelevant.”

Oh, no it is not, David. The answer is very relevant. It’s absolutely maddening, but I will GET to that next time.

In the meantime, Shaw completes her undermining of my brief moment of sympathy for her.

“Does it matter why they changed their minds?” “Yes. Yes, it does.” “I don't understand.” “Well…”

You can stop right there, Shaw.

“I guess that's because I'm a human being… and you're a robot.”

That is the face of a man who has just added another entry to The List.

What the hell kind of line is that. I really, truly do not understand that. In alternate versions of this scene she called him a fucking robot instead, so they were really committed to this idea that she’d deny the personhood of David right here. He's behaved horribly toward others, but basically in the way a child behaves horribly when they feel slighted. He has been mistreated and he didn't like it, so he did what he felt would make it stop. That's a very immature, very human reaction.

Is the movie unaware of this, or is Shaw unaware of this, and making a mistake?

Holloway was positioned as an unlikable character, partly on the weight of using real-world racist language toward David. What does this mean for Shaw? Does this confirm that she’s not supposed to be a likable or moral protagonist? Because she starts doing a “This is Ellen Ripley Elizabeth Shaw” message in a bottle end monologue, as they sail away to David murdering her between now and Alien: Covenant. This is her last living act, as far as her on-screen participation in the series is concerned.

This is just ambiguous enough to make me confused, and not because I’m conflicted about her character–I thought she was a wingnut from early on, and she contributed to a whole lot of destruction and deaths the movie didn’t sell me on as being inevitable. I’m confused because I cannot tell if this movie has a protagonist-centric morality or not.

As stated before, films do not need to follow any sort of moral code or consistency. But when they do, there are two broad ways to go about it: Either a moral code stands on its own, and characters are tested against it regardless of who they are, or morality is exemplified by the protagonist(s), defining the moral framework of the movie through their actions.

Neither of these are inherently bad. They can lead to what we once called “flamewars” on Ye Olde Internet, because this distinction is not explicitly announced by the story, or any story really. If one person thinks a story’s morals are protagonist-centric, or perhaps all stories are protagonist-centric, then a story with a real bastard of a main character can create a very angry response.

As I said previously, Ridley Scott has directed movies where the protagonist is not the moral center of the universe. But big spectacle action movies tend to lean in that direction, and the writer for this movie wrote and produced for both the JJ Abrams Star Trek movies.

You see my problem here.

I’m still thinking that Shaw isn’t meant to be taken as morally correct here. I’m just confused as well, because her ending message is hopeful. That she’s going off to a home planet of the Engineers, because “It is New Years Day, the year of our Lord, 2094," and she’s “still searching” for answers.

I hope that her hope is meant to be read as foreboding. Delusional. I don’t know. What is she expecting, showing up in what they now know is a bioweapon bomber? Why not spend some time trying to figure out how to not bring an apocalypse’s worth of ordinance to wherever she wants to go? “I come in peace” isn’t going to be very convincing when you can–and David certainly will–kill everything that moves.

What a weird way to end the movie. If its characterization wasn’t so often flimsy, I might like it. Instead, I’m just left spinning my wheels as we fade out.

Oh, sorry, we haven’t ended it yet, we need a non-human chestburster to go reee at the camera, like how Alien versus Predator ended.

Great. Good job. That didn’t cheapen the movie at all.

What a mess. What a mess of a movie that didn’t know itself.

But we are not done. Because traditionally, as the credits are rolling, I tell my friends about an interview Ridley Scott gave after Prometheus came out. One where he talks about the Engineers and their motivations.

I have heard the screams of my friends as I told them, and I have laughed. You’re next!

⛬

(Previous) | (Index) | (Next)

⛬

Citations for alt-text rambles

https://media.tenor.com/mweqSDA_s_gAAAAC/game-of-thrones-got.gif 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Offspring_(Star_Trek:_The_Next_Generation)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pharyngeal_jaw 

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-gQYNl0DEC7w/UYhmdkvmOVI/AAAAAAAACA4/HYWxCBYccHM/s1600/Sandworms.jpg

https://bogleech.tumblr.com/post/745405355995037696/i-forgot-people-dont-generally-know-what-these

[hwnglx]

enhypen love life update juseyo

i did not intend on writing this much, but most of their energies were so messy. also, i will not be doing romantic readings on niki as long as he's still a minor.. pls, respect that and stop pressing me in my inbox 🤍 thank you

who in enhypen is dating? dec '23

based on tarot. i do not know these idols personally. energies are always changing. what i say is NOT straight fact. pls take it with a grain of salt!

heeseung

is he dating? star, 5ofsw, world, char, 7ofw&wheel

no, he isn't. he really really wants to, but is starting to feel this sense of hopelessness and lack of faith. it seems like his overly high expectations, standards and hopes are always standing in the way, like he's constantly wanting everything to be perfect. he wants to be a perfect boyfriend to a perfect partner with a perfect relationship, and often finds himself getting a reality check once things don't go according to a plan. he realizes it's a very difficult thing to achieve.

the wheel of fortune is telling me the universe has heeseung's back, and he needs to stop trying to force something that isn't meant to happen yet. he needs to trust the process more and let things flow. i get this very frustrated and almost angry energy from him these days. i feel like he has a lot of stress pent up inside of him.. the bottom of deck shows me the empress. i got this figure a lot for heeseung, so i believe they must be a prominent figure in his life. i can tell he's still reminiscing and longing for this person quite a lot. (half a year ago he was still in a strong relationship, so i'm guessing it's his ex)

jay

is he dating? 6ofc, knofc, 10ofw, 2ofc&10ofsw, 7ofc&queofp

hmm, it's kinda complicated for him. i can see there is a significant person in his life, who he seems to have known for a longer time now and had very romantic and flirty energy with. however, whatever they had seems to have come to an abrupt end, before it could develop into anything substantial. like i don't see any committed full blown relationship here.. this person seems to have feminine energy and prominent earth placements. really gentle and calm person. very pleasant energy. someone easy to be around, i can tell they're well-liked. he still seems to be dreaming about them and their relationship a lot, and often finds himself thinking about what could've been, what could still be.

it's crazy because jay is the member who likes casual relationships the least, but somehow finds himself as one of the members who jumps from person to person more quickly than others, because things never seem to fully work out. confusing as hell. i think he himself gets frustrated over things always not working out fully, since he dedicates so much of himself into every fling he starts. me getting the 10 of wands for him in every love reading is crazy 😵‍💫 he puts a lot of pressure on himself to satisfy the people he's with, no matter how casual the relationship might be.

jake

is he dating? 6ofsw&10ofc, aceofp, 3ofwrx, moon&3ofsw star&2ofw, queofc&9ofp, knofw

yes, he is. but, not his ex. see, his energy is so all over the place right now, that i kinda struggled understanding what's going on, can't even lie. first time i read for him, he seemed very heartbroken over moving on from his last girlfriend. the relationship was like perfection to him, everything he could've ever wished for.. yet he still felt unfulfilled, like it wasn't going anywhere anymore.

(while writing, glimpse of us by joji started playing in my head?.. especially the "why that if she is so perfect, do i still wish that it was you? perfect don't mean that it's working, so what can i do?" line came to my mind, damn)

i can see that he did have problems confronting his ex about this. as i stated before, jake isn't the best at confrontation. he doesn't like hurting people, especially if he deeply cares about them. (which he still does, his ex is still important to him. so i can tell he's kinda frustrated about his state of dissatisfaction) i believe that in his head, breaking up wasn't gonna hit him as hard as it did. but it kinda went the opposite direction, and he spent some time feeling very lost and sad. i saw him crying a lot while reading.

however, seems like he's seeing someone already.. a beautiful water sign person with feminine energy seems to be a figure in his life right now. don't ask me, i myself get all 😳 over this back and forth for him. with the star and the two of wands at the start of the spread, it's evident he made a conscious effort to heal from his hurt. everyone has their own ways of healing.. jake can often be the type to distract himself and escape his emotions with sexual intercourse. i'll be direct, lol. he's a single pringle now, so i guess he's trying to just enjoy that to some extent. the knight of wands is giving very sexual energy, so.. yeah. this queen of cups person is giving me nice energy though, very mature. so who knows how this could end up.

sunghoon

is he dating? 9ofsw+magic+dev&10ofcrx&kingofprx, 7ofw, 2ofp, 10ofw

yes and no.. his energy is very messy. i can see there's someone in his life he has a relationship with, but i don't think it's an overly committed one, instead one of more physical nature. there is this feeling of heavy co dependency though, and i'm getting this confusion of "what are we?", especially on that person's side. it's giving this toxic (😈 card..) relationship where someone doesn't wanna put a label on it, but still demands a sense of control over you.

the burden of the responsibility that comes with making this an "official" relationship seems to be something sunghoon is avoiding, esp. since he's very busy. i can see this stressing his "partner" out immensely. a lot of push and pull going on, and this person is feeling used, but can't let go since they do hold strong feelings for sunghoon, and he makes them believe it's a two-sided thing. which to an extent seems to be true, but.. sht is just all over the place. whenever i read for sunghoon in general, his energy can be pretty comfortable and laidback. but as soon as it comes to romantic readings.. the man is a whole different guy. his venus and mars in scorpio don't play.

sunoo

is he dating? queofp&pagofw, aceofc, hangm&9ofc

yes and no for sunoo too.. he's another one who has something with this earth sign person, however it's all extremely fresh and lose still. it's more in the beginning stages, yet sunoo already seems to be like "meh, you're not entertaining me enough." and kinda putting everything on hold. (like randomly leaving them on read) i can tell this person likes him a lot and feels let down by his non committal attitude, since they themselves seem to be someone who puts a lot of themselves into every relationship they start. sunoo's behavior is making them feel very insecure, and they're afraid he's just leading them on.

he's the type to only call when he's bored, or feels lonely. he only contacts them when he feels like he can get something out of it, it seems. and not really realizing (or not wanting to realize) that this person already values what they have a lot, and his behavior is messing with them. sunoo is so absorbed in this own world, that he doesn't seem to pay much attention to that at all. it's not something he concerns himself with.

jungwon

is he dating? 8ofp, 2ofp, hangm, 4ofw&9ofc

no, he isn't. and seems to be happy that way. the only member whose energy didn't make me feel like i'm going a little insane, thank you jungwon 🥹 he has his entire focus on work right now, and is consciously making the decision not to start anything in his romantic life. there is so much on his plate, that he feels it'd currently be difficult for him to find enough time and energy for a relationship. jungwon has very high standards, he's someone who exactly knows what he wants and needs. he dedicates his entire heart and soul to everything he does, in various aspects of life, including his love life. so, he's either all in a relationship, or all out, doesn't start one at all.

the happy four of wands together with the proud nine of cups shows him in a very content and comfortable place, a lot of confidence and satisfaction. not having a partner doesn't seem to bother him at all.

[sistersorrow]

Back in July, I had a problem: I had finished Nona the Ninth and realised I had no idea when Alecto the Ninth would come out

I didn't feel like picking out a new novel to read every 10 days or so, so I decided I'd pick one very long book and hope it tided me over until a release date was given

So on the 19th of July 2024, I started reading Worm, and a bit over three months later, I read the final line of the final chapter on October 23rd

I have had many thoughts about this book while reading it, and since I haven't had access to the internet for the last two week, I've also had many thoughts after reading it, mainly thoughts where I was drafting this post (despite thinking about my draft for five days, now that I'm finally writing it, I can feel the whole thing fading from my mind)

TL;DR: I genuinely think the ending didn't happen

Yes, the whole "It was all a dream/purgatory" angle is very cliche, but it's a very common theory in the Worm fandom for a reason (one of those reasons being Wildbow jokingly saying Taylor's in purgatory)

For me, that reason is that Taylor is way too okay with the state of her life after Golden Morning

Throughout the book, Taylor has a consistent pattern of behaviour where she sees a problem or has a goal, decides on a means of realising that goal/fixing the problem, with anyone who attempts to get in her way being treated as part of the problem, allowing her to more easily justify using ever escalating acts of incredible violence to terrorise them into either helping her or getting out of her way

Taylor, by her own admission lives for conflict because for her things make the most sense when she has a very clear target to oppose and doesn't have to think past the near future because in the present the target is actively trying to kill her, and there are people who simply refuse to listen to her when she talks about ways to deal with the problem

Her, I dunno, ascension(?) to Khepri is just that pattern of behaviour taken to its logical extreme: the problems are Scion and people refusing to fight Scion or not working together, so she resolves the issue by resolving the issue of their free will and makes them fight in concert to bully Golden Space Jesus into killing himself

Despite the Speck arc being 174 pages of Taylor's brain being formatted by a fragment of an alien god as it remove any aspect of her personality that doesn't either facilitate acts of violence or think of new ways to commit acts of violence, Taylor has never been more herself than in that moment, hell, when she finishes scouring the multiverse for capes to turn into superpowered people puppets for her slave swarm and faces down the most powerful being to walk the earth as she realises she's beginning to forget where her mother's grave is, she stops to think about how nice it is that everyone is finally working together for once, just like she always wanted

The kind of person who does that to herself and others simply is not going to be able to adjust to civilian life, where she's going to continue to be exposed to the systemic failings that frustrated her into being Skitter in the first place only now without the tools or resources she used to effect change back on her Earth

At best, Interlude: End Taylor would be horribly depressed, and at worst feel like she's been placed in her own personal hell

For this reason, I genuinely think Contessa realised there was no coming back from what Taylor had become and decided to end her there, with the final interlude being a dying dream cooked up by her shard or something just before their connection was fatally severed, and honestly, I'm completely fine with that cause it feels like a natural conclusion for her arc, even if dream theories are always a bit contentious