#i'm still so proud of this comic!! PLEASE LOOK AT IT | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

stevie-petey · 10 months ago

Text

episode eight: the upside down

You know you shouldn’t, but you laugh. Honestly, after everything you’ve been through tonight with Steve, how can he possibly think the two of you aren’t friends? “Why are you laughing?” Steve mumbles, confused. “Sorry,” you wheeze out, still uncontrollably laughing. “It’s just–I mean, dude! We almost died together, of course we’re friends now!” “We are?” He looks like a little kid on Christmas day being given the gift he’s always wanted. Your heart warms. “Yes, idiot.”

summary: drinking game time ! take a shot every time jonathan tries ditching you or every time you almost die at the byers house, you find out that steve really is an athlete and tbh it's hot, but you know what's even hotter ? saving hawkins and reaching a tentative compromise with steve after he loans you $5 for snacks. after, jonathan makes a promise you really hope he can keep.

rating: general, cursing and slight scary violence

warnings: violence, use of fire and weapons, guns, use of fem!reader and use of y/n, slight mentions of blood and death

words: 13.7k

before you swing in: the final chapter ,,, my heart </3 please enjoy my child, i put so much into this chapter. action scenes scare me, they're hard and i'm weak, so i hope this lives up to everything you guys wanted n more ;) i cannot believe we're at the end (but i do have another chapter planned that's set in season 1, so shhhh). thank you so so so much for all your support. i never thought this silly lil fic would get that much attention, but i'm insanely flattered and grateful for each and every one of y'all. i'm so proud of what i've created and you guys are my beloveds ,,, anyways, enjoy !!!

You almost miss Jonathan and Nancy sneaking off.

You had been explaining a comic book that had been in your bag to El when you noticed a shift in your periphery. Turning your head, you see Jonathan stand, offer Nancy his hand to help her up, and then walk towards the main doors together.

What the fuck.

“They wouldn’t dare…” You excuse yourself and run out the gym and into the hallway to follow them, absolutely furious. You’re so sick of their bullshit, of Jonathan’s bullshit and putting Nancy first. This isn’t even a petty jealousy thing, this is about the years of friendship between the two of you that has just suddenly disappeared within a damn week all due to circumstances completely out of your control.

The slam of the main door is the only warning Jonathan gets before you’re yanking him by his coat and flinging him back, forcing him to look at you. “Where the fuck do you think you’re going?”

You’ve never, ever yelled at him like this before. Not even earlier this week when he’d given you that bullshit apology after screaming at you for being in his room, for saying the two of you weren’t family. You didn’t yell at him for hiding Nancy’s pictures from you, for going off without you to find the monster. Despite everything, you’ve never been this cruel to him, even if he may have deserved it at times.

Jonathan’s wide eyes stare down at your hand that’s still clutched around his coat, frightened. “Bug, we were just–”

“Just what? Sneaking off without me?”

“It’s not like that, Y/N.” Nancy now steps in, her hands held up as if you’re some rabid dog she wants to calm down. “We just figured we’d help Joyce and Hopper.”

“‘We’? Are you fucking kidding me? You two talked about this, had an entire conversation, and still somehow came to the conclusion that ditching me was a great fucking idea?” You scoff, deeply hurt by the fact that the two of them had an entire conversation without thinking to include you in it.

“Bug, can we talk about this one on one?” Jonathan asks, his voice lowered. You can see the genuine upset in his eyes and for a moment your grip on him lessens, but then you see Nancy behind him and your anger only returns.

“No, we can discuss this right here.”

He sighs and tries to grab the hand not clutching his coat, but you slap it away. “Bug–”

“You’ve lost that privilege.”

“Bug–I mean, Y/N,” His voice falters. “Look, my mom and Hopper are out there right now trying to find Will while that monster is still out. Nance and I… We want to finish what we started.”

“Without me?” You don’t mean for it to happen, but your voice catches at the end.

Jonathan’s gaze softens and this time he succeeds in grabbing your hand. You let go of him and allow him to pull you in, weak against him as always. “I’m doing this to protect them, to protect you, Y/N. I’m always trying to protect you. You know that, right?”

You used to think that you did, but now? You’re not so sure, and it terrifies you.

Nancy has stepped away from the conversation, now kicking at rocks while you’re with Jonathan, and you can’t help but think about how wrong all of this feels.

Throughout this entire week it’s felt like someone has given you a photo of Jonathan, smeared its lines and edges, removed his moles and his crooked smile and made it neater, altered so that if you squint you can see the boy you grew up with underneath it all… But it’s fuzzy, almost too unclear to really see.

Now he’s standing in front of you, his smile once more crooked and cunning and his moles faded underneath the moonlight and for a second you can see him. There he is, clear and untouched and him in a way that’s never quite been yours.

“I know,” you tell him. “But how many more times do you expect me to forgive you for lying and ditching me? If you want to protect me, you need to talk to me.”

Jonathan winces. “I know, I know it sounds stupid and I know I’ve fucked up more than enough this week, I just get caught up in wanting to make sure you’re safe. It’d kill me if I let anything happen to you… I just, I can’t lose you, bug.”

“So pushing me away is your grand plan of keeping me?”

“I’ve always been an idiot.” He manages a smile, and you can’t help but laugh.

“That’s true, but if you attempt to ditch me one more time I swear to god I’ll pour tar all over your car.”

The boy laughs and for a brief moment everything feels okay again, but it doesn’t last very long. “In our defense, we figured you’d be better off with the kids since you’re not really a fighter, ya know?”

You drop his hand. “Excuse me?”

Jonathan’s smile is gone. “What?”

“I’m not really a fighter? You’re kidding, right?”

“Hey, no I didn’t mean it like that–” Jonathan fumbles over his words, clearly taken aback by your sudden mood change.

You step away from him. “How many times did I defend you against Lonnie? Better yet, remind me how we became friends in the first place. Wasn’t it because I threw milk at a bunch of idiots bullying you? Huh?”

“Y/N–”

“God, I can’t believe I almost let you get away with it again! I mean, do you even hear the bullshit that comes out of your mouth?” You deepen your voice, now doing a poor impersonation of him. “‘Hey, bug! You know I love you, right? Cool! Now, I’m gonna go do fuck all and ignore you and ditch you and then somehow turn it into me being a good guy because duh! I can never do any wrong!’”

“Please, just–”

“Did I get it right? It was a pretty good impersonation in my opinion. I mean, I am the one who has had to deal with this shit all fucking week. I think I'm an expert on this topic now.”

Jonathan looks pained but you don’t fucking care anymore. You’ve reached your limit, you’re sick and tired of being treated like some delicate creature that’s incapable of taking care of itself. You literally slapped Tommy Hagan this afternoon in order to help Jonathan, yet here he is basically calling you weak.

And yet Nancy is the fighter. She’s the one who gets to go along on the adventure while you’re sidelined because for some damn reason you’re always the second option. Never taking matters into your own hands, always the one left behind to clean up the mess and take care of those also discarded.

You’re sick of it.

You step closer to Jonathan again, so that you’re nose to nose, and whisper, “I’m tired of never being good enough.”

And with that, you reach into his coat and snatch up his keys, a game you’ve always played with him but now has turned into a bitter taste in your mouth, and run back into the gym. Someone has to inform the kids of the plan, make sure they’ll be okay on their own.

Dustin sees you approach and smiles, but when he notices the angry pace in your steps, he frowns. “Uh oh.”

“Yeah, uh oh.”

“Jonathan again?”

You nod, still too angry to trust your words. “Yeah.”

He notices the keys in your hand. “Where are you going?”

Mike and Lucas look over now, curious as to what’s happening.

You sigh. “I’m going with Nancy and Jonathan to the Byers house, we’re going to kill the monster.”

“Why the hell are you going?” Dustin exclaims while Mike shoutes “sick!” and Lucas mumbles “great, alone again”. El remains quiet, still resting.

You flick your brother’s hat. “I have to, Dustin.”

“For Jonathan?” He shakes his head. “I like him, but aren’t you mad at him right now?”

“Is it just me, or is she always mad at him these days?” Mike whispers over to Lucas, who simply shrugs.

“Girls, man.”

You ignore them and focus on Dustin. “It doesn’t matter. He needs my help, and no one in the party gets left behind. Remember?”

“Y/N–”

“I love you,” you kiss the top of his head. “I promise I’ll be safe, just be careful, okay? I’m putting you in charge, so don’t let me down. If everything goes according to plan, I’ll see you in a few hours tops!”

Dustin tries to argue some more, but you quickly run back outside before he can get another word in. You feel horrible leaving him behind, but you know this is the right decision. If you can kill the monster, there’s less of a chance of the kids or Joyce and Hopper getting hurt. Jonathan and Nancy may be fine on their own, but there’s always power in numbers and they’ll need all the help they can get.

You just… you have to help. You know this is what you’re supposed to be doing, even if it pains you to do so. Dustin and the kids are smart; as long as they stay at the school, they’ll be fine.

In theory, that is.

Nancy and Jonathan are waiting for you outside. You push past them and march towards Jonathan’s care; they awkwardly follow after you. You unlock it, throw yourself into the backseat, and promptly dig through your backpack to make sure you have everything.

The two teens get in a few minutes after you. Not one word is spoken as Jonathan starts the car and the three of you drive off, leaving Hawkins Middle behind.

–

You thought the car ride with Nancy and Jonathan from the funeral home had been tense, but this one? Downright painful.

Jonathan has a tight grip on the steering wheel and keeps trying to catch your eye through the rearview mirror but you avoid his gaze. You’ve spent the last five minutes arranging and rearranging your backpack to give you something to do while Nancy has tried three times to make conversation to make this car ride bearable.

“El seems nice.”

“You said four words to her, Nancy.” You retort, switching open your switchblade once more to watch the moonlight dance off of its blades.

“Right.”

Nancy shifts uncomfortably in the passenger seat. You know she realizes she’s once again upset the balance in your relationship with Jonathan. It was only an hour ago that she tried getting you to admit your feelings for him before convincing the boy to up and leave you. Sure, Jonathan made his own decision in the end, but damn. She could’ve at least pretended to want you around.

She notices your knives and tries to spark conversation again. “I love the color of the handle, it’s beautiful.”

“Thanks,” you switch the blades closed and sit up in your seat. “Anyways, you geniuses have a plan or were you just counting on ditching me and winging it from there?”

“Y/N–”

“No, Nancy. I insist, let’s talk about a plan. We’re here to kill a monster, right?”

She closes her mouth and frowns, turning to Jonathan for help, but he’s no use. He’s busy tapping his fingers against the wheel and praying that the world will just swallow him up whole. Too bad for him you’re a stubborn pain in the ass and would simply pluck him back up so you can torture him some more.

Nancy sighs. “Well, Jonathan and I were thinking we use the supplies we got earlier and lure the monster to his place, then we kill it.”

“Awesome plan, guys!” You say, your voice dripping with sickly sweetness that leaves them both feeling even more uncomfortable. “But may I suggest some actual details or shall we just bank off of this wonderfully dull and vague plan?”

“Sure, Y/N. Tell us what you had in mind.” Nancy rubs her face tiredly, knowing she deserves this.

“Great! I’m assuming we’re luring the monster with blood?” They nod at you, so you continue. “Okay, so before we lure it I think we should completely booby-trap Jonathan’s house. Nail the bear trap down onto the floor, make sure the floor is cleared of anything that could trip us up. Then, once we’ve got the house secured, we knick ourselves to draw some blood and pray to whatever god is up there that we can kill the thing.”

You pause for a moment, remembering how all the Christmas lights had been unscrewed by Joyce earlier. “The lights, we need to fix them. The monster communicates through the lights so if we have them, then we can track it.”

“That all sounds great, bug.” Jonathan finally speaks up, ass kissing.

“Thanks, pal. Still don’t have the bug privilege back, but I’m sure you simply forgot.”

He gulps, once more going back to being silent as he drives you and Nancy to his house.

Nancy again tries to diffuse the tension. “How do we even kill the monster though? I mean, will my bullets be enough?”

“I have this idea, but it’s… well, it’s out there.” You bite your lip, now feeling your cocky demeanor slipping. “If we can safely set fire to it, I think that’s our best bet.”

“Fire?” Jonathan exclaims, but Nancy shushes him.

“I think you’re right.”

“Y/N, I know you’re mad at me but do we really have to set fire to my house–”

Now it’s your turn to shush Jonathan. “This isn’t about that. I wouldn’t burn your house down, I already told you I’d just pour tar on your car whenever I get the chance. For now, I really do think the best thing to do is burn the monster alive. In every horror movie and book, fire always gets the job done.”

Despite herself, Nancy lets out a soft chuckle as Jonathan parks the car, now at his house. “She’s right, Jonathan. And who burns down houses these days? Tar really is the best form of revenge.”

“I’m flattered, Wheeler. At the rate you’re going, you’ll be off my shitlist in no time.” You tell her, patting her on the shoulder before getting out of the car. You quickly open up the trunk and gather the monster hunting supplies while Jonathan and Nancy take their time getting out.

You let yourself into the Byers home using your own key to the place. It’s been nestled in between the key to your house and the spare key to Jonathan’s car on your keychain for a few years now.

The first thing you get started on are the lights. There’s hundreds of them to get through, but you drop your supplies and begin screwing them in one by one. Nancy and Jonathan come in soon after and silently begin to help.

No conversation is made besides the necessary comments about the prep work. You’re all too focused on the possibility of what could happen next; the danger of the situation has finally set in. After the lights have all been fixed, you instruct Jonathan to begin nailing the bear trap down while you and Nancy discuss where to pour the gasoline. You both agree to make a path from the living room to Will’s room.

As Nancy pours the gasoline, you follow behind her and pick up any flammables. You weren't lying to Jonathan earlier, you really don’t want to burn his house down. While the house is wrecked, it’s still a home despite everything that’s happened in it. You practically grew up within its walls, you’d do anything to keep it as protected as possible.

When you’re done, you watch Nancy load her gun. A shiver runs down our spine; she looks at ease with it, which you figure should be reassuring, but the gravity of everything leaves you feeling on edge. You leave her alone and walk into the kitchen where Jonathan is, now hammering a ton of nails into his bat.

You begin to sharpen your blades next to him, still finding that you only feel secure by his side. The rhythmic sound of his hammering calms you, in a sense. It serves as a distraction. You know you insisted on coming, you don’t regret it and you know you’re stronger than everyone seems to give you credit for, but you’re also terrified. This isn’t just some adventure in the woods; this could kill the ones you love dearly.

Once you’re both done preparing your weapons, the two of you walk to Will’s room and rig up a simple snare. Jonathan grabs a yo-yo and you pull up a chair to set it on. The idea is that when the string gets pulled, it’ll alert you that the monster has sprung the bear trap. It’s not the most efficient warning system, but it’ll have to do.

The last thing to do is set the bear trap, which takes all three of you to achieve. Jonathan and Nancy hold down the edges with their body weight and you very carefully set the trap with your hand. You shake a bit as you do so, but you force your nerves down. You remind yourself that Jonathan thinks you’re too weak, too cowardly, you have to prove him wrong.

When the bear trap clicks into place, you let out a harsh exhale and sink against the wall, your heart still pounding. Jonathan and Nancy copy you and the three of you sit in silence. You’re still shaking a bit, and Jonathan is next to you just as tense, but for the first time since you’ve met him you can’t reach out to grab his hand to steady yourself. He’s too far, both literally and figuratively. Even with him next to you, you couldn’t be more far apart.

In the back of your mind, you hope the kids are alright. Hopefully they’re having a better night than you currently are.

“C’mon,” you say after a few minutes, getting up to walk over to the living room. “We’ve done all we can, now we just have to draw some blood and be the prettiest bait in Hawkins.”

–

Nancy and Jonathan decide to cut the palm of their hands, but you respectfully would rather die than have a matching scar with them. The idea makes you so uncomfortable you visibly cringe when Jonathan tells you the idea. “Yeah, no thanks. I think I’ll find somewhere else to cut.”

He looks hurt by what you’ve said but doesn’t voice it. Instead, the three of you stand in the living room in a triangle facing each other and he begins reciting the plan. “Remember…”

Nancy goes first. “Straight into Will’s room and–”

“Don’t step on the trap.” You finish.

Jonathan nods. “And then?”

“Wait for the yo-yo to move.” The girl says.

“Then…” Jonathan flicks the lighter on.

You whistle low. “Let there be light…”

“Right. Light.” The boy nods again. “Alright, we ready?”

“Ready.”

“Scar time.”

Jonathan and Nancy bring their hands up and place their knives flat against their palms. You roll up your sleeve and place your own knife against the upper part of your arm, just below your shoulder, and take a deep breath.

“On three,” Jonathan says. He begins counting and you all can’t seem to stop shaking. He senses your unease and looks up at you and Nancy. “You guys don’t have to do this.”

Nancy glares at him, her own voice shaky. “Jonathan, stop talking.”

You nod. “Yeah, what she said.”

Jonathan tries to argue, but Nancy squeezes her eyes shut and yells, “Three!”

You close your own eyes and slice at your arm, the pain immediate. You gasp out, never having been good with pain, but you know you have to do this for Will. The blood trails down your arm, dripping from your elbow onto the ground, and you watch as blood from Jonathan’s and Nancy’s own cuts falls onto the ground too.

Well, at least it’ll be an easy scar to hide compared to theirs.

“Fuck, that stings.” You say to break the silence, and Nancy nods her head in agreement.

“Not the most pleasant feeling.”

Jonathan guides the two of you over to the couch and grabs the first aid kit that you had prepared on the coffee table. He sits in the middle, leaving room for both you and Nancy on each side of him, but you’re still pissed at him and opt to sit on the floor in front of the couch.

Nancy begins to patch up his wound, and it takes everything within you not to reach over and help him yourself. It feels unnatural to watch someone else taking care of him, but the space between you still feels too vast to cross.

You patch up your own cut while the two of them talk quietly. You wind a bandage tight around your arm, ensuring you won’t bleed through, and Jonathan watches above you with guilt in his eyes. Nancy is trying to reassure him that everything will be okay, but as he watches you struggle to tie the bandage he wonders if he’s fucked up more than just your friendship.

“Bug, let me help with that.” He leans down and ties your bandage before you can stop him.

You glare at him, still having not said anything to Jonathan besides what was needed for preparation. Nancy distracts herself by cleaning up around his cut and your stomach twists into knots. This is all so miserable.

“Y/N, I know you’re upset with me and you can go whenever. I won’t blame you, you’ve done enough for me.” Jonathan says, trying to catch your eye.

You turn away and inspect your bandage, still reeling over the fact that he tied it for you. “I’m here for Will, and only Will.”

“Y/N…” There’s a hurt in his voice that almost makes you turn around to throw your arms around his neck and whisper a million apologies to him. To tell him everything, that you love him and that you’d do anything for him and that’s why you’re so terrified of how you feel. You know you’d burn yourself up if it meant he’d be taken care of, if it meant he was safe and happy and far away from anything that could harm him. You know you’d use up everything within you to love him.

Instead, you remain silent.

After getting no response from you, Jonathan clears his throat and begins to say something about how the lights will serve as an alarm for the monster, trying to pretend that everything is okay, but he’s cut off by a sudden pounding on the door.

You all jump and your fingers tighten around your switchblade, ready to open it. As your heart pounds you think of all the possible ways the plan could go wrong. When you’re on possibility number twelve, a voice calls through the door.

“Jonathan?”

“Is that… Steve?” You say out loud, in complete disbelief.

Steve continues to pound on the door. “Are you there, man? It’s… It’s Steve! Listen, I just wanna talk!”

You’re the first to react, standing up to run over to the door. You fling it open and step outside, making sure Steve won’t be able to see inside the house. When he sees you, he stumbles back a bit. “Henderson?”

His face is still bleeding from earlier and his hair is a mess, and yet there’s a softness to him that you haven’t seen before with him. “Steve, now isn’t really a good time.”

“Can I just talk to Jonathan real quick? I just… I want to apologize about what happened earlier, see if we can maybe–” His eyes land on your bandaged arm. You curse and roll down your sleeve, feeling like an idiot for forgetting to hide the wound before going outside.

Steve reaches out to touch it, a hint of worry on his face and his voice is now full of concern. “Hey, are you okay?”

You shiver at his touch, it’s gentle as he skims along the bandage and inspects it for any other problems. You pull away, now hiding the wound. “It’s nothing, but you should really go.”

“I want to help you, Y/N. Do you need me to get you anything?” His face is so full of worry for you that it makes you ache. Then a thought occurs to him. “Wait, where’s Byers? Why isn’t he here to help you?”

You’re about to make up a lie, but Nancy flings the door open. “Steve, listen to me.”

He looks between the two of you in complete shock. “Okay, what–”

“You need to leave.” Nancy orders.

Steve looks at you. “I’m not trying to start anything, okay?”

“I know, but–” You get cut off by Nancy.

“I don’t care about that. You need to leave.”

Steve begins to plead with the girl and you step away a bit, not wanting to intrude. You feel bad for him, he looks so beat down by what’s happened today and you suppose that you can’t really blame him. After spending maybe a total of ten hours with Nancy and Jonathan, you also have come close to losing your mind.

If you were with Jonathan, if you truly had him, you’d react the same as Steve. Begging for the girl he loves to listen to him, to give him another chance with the promise of him changing.

“I just want to make things right.” Steve says, impressing you with his vulnerability. He’s openly admitting to his mistakes and taking accountability mere hours after the situation has occurred, leaving you both in awe of him and also saddened for him. He loves Nancy more than anything, you can hear it in his voice.

He deserves better.

As you’re thinking this, you see his eyes flicker down towards Nancy’s bandaged hand and his brows furrow. “What happened to your hand? Is that blood?” His eyes now flicker over to you again. “Why are you both hurt?”

“We’re clumsy?” You say as Nancy yanks her hand away from Steve.

“It was an accident.” She agrees.

Steve looks between the two of you, now sensing that something else is wrong. “What’s going on?”

“Nothing!” Nancy insists, but something in Steve’s demeanor shifts.

“Wait a second, did he do this to you? To Y/N?” His once soft voice is now filled with anger and you step in front of him.

“Steve, it wasn’t Jonathan. You need to go, I promise I’ll explain everything later–”

He grabs you by your side and gently moves you so that he can get past and shove through the door. Nancy yells at him to stop and tries to push him out, but she’s useless against his strength. When he manages to break in, he stumbles inside and scans over the house.

“Shit!” You follow after him, your brain running a million miles a second trying to figure out how to explain everything to him.

“What the fuck?” Steve mumbles, eyeing the bat with nails in it. “Y/N, what’s going on here?”

He’s looking to you for reassurance and you guess he assumes that the two of you are allies in this Jonathan and Nancy situation. You really wish you could explain, but Jonathan has grabbed him by the shoulders and is trying to push him outside. The two stumble around for a few seconds and you just helplessly watch.

“Steve, there’s no time to explain, please just listen to Jonathan and get out of here!” You’re helping Jonathan now, trying to get Steve out the door and away from harm’s reach, but he’s still fighting back confused and lost as ever and you pity him.

You hear a click and turn around, gasping when you see Nancy holding her gun up to Steve. “Woah, what the fuck Nancy?”

“What! What is going on?” Steve yells, now more panicked than anything else.

While Jonathan has stepped away, you find yourself standing in front of Steve as if to somehow block the bullet. You can’t let him get hurt, he doesn’t have any part of this, he can still have a normal and happy life if he just leaves now. “Nancy, put the fucking gun down, this isn’t helping!”

Steve pleads with her as well and the two of you scream at the girl to just listen and not swing around loaded weapons, but Nancy remains firm in her stance. “You have five seconds to get out of here. I’m doing this for you.”

“Because holding a gun to his head is any better than telling him the truth?” You exclaim, entirely over the situation.

As the four of you are arguing, the lights begin to flicker. Steve and Nancy don’t seem to notice, but you do. You look at Jonathan and say your first real words to him in hours. “Jonathan…”

He hears you and he runs over to your side, grabbing your hand as the two of you stand shoulder to shoulder. You feel your heartbeat race and you can feel him shaking beside you. He’s terrified, so are you, but his hand around yours manages to steady you.

“Nancy!” Jonathan tries to get the girl’s attention, but she’s too busy counting down to hear him.

He shouts at her again and the lights start to flicker more wildly and you draw your switchblade out, adrenaline coursing through you. It’s time.

Jonathan yells once more and finally catches Nancy’s attention. “The lights!”

She whips her head around and curses, Jonathan, still tightly holding your hand, tugs you along so that you follow him as he secures his weapons and grabs the bat. “It’s here.”

“What’s here?” Steve is flailing around, utterly lost.

You all ignore him and now stand back to back in a triangle. Nancy holds up her gun, Jonathan wields his bat, and you flick your wrist to bring out your knives. “Where is it?”

“I don’t know!”

The lights flicker rapidly and you feel overwhelmed. They were supposed to serve as a guide towards the monster, but there's no possible way to see which direction it’ll come from and for a fleeting moment you think you’ve made a huge mistake.

Steve is still screaming, demanding answers, but you’re too busy scanning your surroundings to offer him some information. “Hello? Will someone please explain to me what the hell is going–”

The roof opens up, cutting Steve off, and you scream as the monster attempts to come down right above you. Jonathan shields you from the fallen debris and you cling onto him in utter fear. This isn’t real. This cannot be happening.

Nancy begins to shoot at the thing while Jonathan guides you to safety. He brings you to the edge of the living room and holds your face in his hands, forcing you to really look at him for the first time all night. “Listen to me, stay here while I get Nancy.”

He kisses your forehead and then leaves, rushing over to Nancy to pull her away and guide her towards Will’s room. Steve stands next to you, frozen, and it forces you back to reality. The plan, you have to stick to the plan.

You grab Steve’s hand and yank him so that he follows. The monster has dropped down now, a horrible creature on all fours that opens its gaping mouth to let out a horrible screech that you feel deep within your bones. This is what killed Barb.

The four of you run to Will’s room and you only just barely have enough time to warn Steve about the bear trap. You look over your shoulder and shout, “Jump!” right as your ankle catches on its chains.

You fall. Hard.

Pain sears through your ankle and you try to get up, but any pressure on it sends flames through your entire body and you let out another scream. The monster catches up, looming over you, and you brace for your death. There’s no fucking way you’re getting out of this.

You squeeze your eyes as the monster stalks close to you, its ugly mouth open and ready to kill you. Jonathan is screaming at you to get up, but Nancy is holding him back from helping. You’re relieved by this, knowing that someone has to be there for Will once this is all done. He’ll need his brother, and Nancy seems to understand this. You catch her eye and nod at her, sending a silent thank you.

“Bug! No, let go of me! I have to help her, Nancy!” Jonathan’s voice becomes hoarse by how loud he screams, his voice breaking with fear and desperation.

Then, right before the monster lunges at you, you feel a familiar pair of arms slide underneath your legs and pick you up. “What–”

Steve Harrington has swooped in to save you, picking you up as if you weigh nothing, ever the athlete, and swiftly jumps over the bear trap while screaming his head off. “Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!”

You’re so delirious from the pain in your ankle and the adrenaline pumping through your veins that you can’t help but let a laugh escape you. No fucking way is any of this real. Steve Harrington is carrying you bridal style into Will’s bedroom with Jonathan and Nancy as witnesses.

What a life.

Once you’re both secured in the room, Steve sets you down gently right as Nancy yells at him to shut up. As soon as Steve lets go of you, Jonathan is at your side and pulls you into a crushing hug.

“Bug.” He breathes out against your ear, relief heavy.

“I’m okay.” You tell him, threading your fingers through his hair. He’s shaking harder than ever, and holding onto you as if he’s scared he’ll lose you again. “I’m okay, bee.”

He pulls away and his hands are all over you, checking everywhere for any other injuries. “Did it hurt you, are you bleeding? There should be a first aid kit–”

You grab his hands and kiss his knuckles, which seems to calm him down a bit. “I’m fine, just twisted my ankle. If you help me up, I’m sure I’ll be able to stand again.”

Jonathan quickly helps you to your feet and you lean against him for the extra support. While you put on a brave face for Jonathan, you’re terrified out of your fucking mind. You almost died. Jonathan is still holding your hand and he’s looking at you as if seeing you for the first time and you force yourself to look away. It’s the same look from the field days ago, when you thought he’d kiss you.

You have to focus on what’s at stake.

How the hell are you guys supposed to kill this thing?

The monster screeches, breaking the moment between you and Jonathan, and he flicks his lighter on and forces you to stand behind him. Nancy holds up her gun and you bring your knives closer to your face, Steve standing weaponless behind you.

You all wait, tense, for the monster. It stalks closer to the room, its awful growls alerting you of its proximity, but it doesn’t appear.

“What’s it doing?” Nancy asks, frustrated.

“I don’t know.” You respond, equally as frustrated and scared.

Another few agonizing seconds pass, and you stare at the yo-yo and hope that it remains still. Then, the lights stop flickering and it becomes quiet. All you can hear is your blood roaring in your ears.

Nancy looks around. “Do you hear anything?”

“No,” Jonathan shakes his head, inching closer to the door.

“Wait!” You tug at your still interlocked hands. You pick up his bat that had been thrown on the ground and hand it to him. “Be careful. Please.”

He gives your hand one last squeeze before letting go, accepting the bat.

As Jonathan pokes his head out to see if the monster is outside, Steve bends his head down and whispers in your ear, “Romantic.”

“Shut. Up.” You hit him in the chest, fearfully watching your best friend to make sure he doesn't die. When he motions an all clear, Nancy follows him outside, then you, then Steve.

The house is silent and your heart sinks when you see that the bear trap has been left untouched. You realize with a horrible gut wrench that the monster is smarter than the three of you had anticipated.

So much for your plan, then.

“It’s smarter than we thought.”

“Yeah,” Jonathan agrees with dismay.

He stalks against the wall towards the living room and you all follow in a single file line. You do your best to stick close to the wall but you limp with every step. Your ankle is definitely out of commission for now. Great.

All of you are on edge, waiting for the other shoe to drop. It couldn’t have been that easy, there’s no possible way that the monster simply up and left. You enter the living room, which has gotten even more wrecked due the monster. The wallpaper has been torn off of some parts of the wall and you see papers scattered everywhere.

“Shit…” you mumble, kicking at a shredded wallpaper strip.

In the corner, Steve has started to hyperventilate and mumble to himself. “This is crazy, this is so crazy, this is fucking crazy.”

You limp over to him and grab his shoulders, making him face you. “Steve, hey. It’s okay, I’m here.”

“Y/N, what the hell just happened?”

“It’s… complicated. For now, can you trust me that everything will be okay?”

“Of course I trust you, it’s just…” He nods, his eyes softening. You lessen your hold on him and give him a smile, he seems to be calming down. Then, he looks around the room and seemingly remembers where he is. “This is crazy!”

Steve lunges for the phone on the wall and tries to call for help.

You stumble after him, the pain in your ankle slowing you down. “Steve, wait–”

Nancy gets to him first, grabbing the phone out of his hand and throwing it across the room. He looks at her, shocked. “What are you doing? Are you insane?”

“It’s going to come back!” Nancy yells at him, and you wince at the way she treats him. You know Steve will only listen to her, but she could at least be nicer about the whole situation. The three of you have had some time to process everything happening, Steve was thrown into the deep end.

“You could be a little nicer,” you mumble, and Nancy sends you a glare. You raise your hands up in surrender. “Sorry.”

“Steve, you need to leave. Right now.”

He looks so overwhelmed and you give him a pitying look. He stares at you, reminiscent of the way he looked at you earlier in the alley, silently begging you to say something, anything, but again you can only shake your head at him. You won’t force him to stay, it wouldn’t be fair.

“Y/N, please…” He tries one more time to get you on his side, but you can’t. Frustrated by your lack of response, Steve groans. “Fuck it!”

He runs out the door.

You’ll admit that you’re a bit disappointed, but you also understand. Who in their right mind would stay?

You and Nancy share a look before the lights begin to flicker again. Dread fills you. “Fuck…”

Jonathan is back by your side and he and Nancy again form a triangle with you, all your backs pressed together as you desperately try to locate the monster. You all stumble in a circle, searching for any sign of the thing, but there’s nothing.

“Where is it?” Nancy gasps out.

“Just fucking show yourself!” You shout, just wanting this all to be over with. Your body is drained from living in a state of fear for so long.

“Come on you son of a bitch!” Jonathan echoes your taunts.

Suddenly the lights turn off and you’re left alone in complete darkness. Faintly you can hear the monster’s familiar growl approaching from behind you. The hair on the back of your neck stands up, the air stands still. It’s back. Before you can react, it pounces on Jonathan.

“Jonathan!” You scream alongside Nancy. Desperation takes over you and before you can even process what’s happening, you ignore the pain in your ankle and jump onto its back, stabbing repeatedly at it.

Your blades only bounce off of its thick skin and the monster struggles to get you off. You hold on as tight as you can, shouting and kicking at it so that it can’t hurt him, but then it opens its mouth and for a horrifying moment you’re afraid that Jonathan will die.

“No!” You scream even louder than before and double down on your effort, stabbing and slashing as much as you possibly can to try and create some damage, but your arms are starting to ache and your ankle now feels like it’s on fire.

“Nancy, its skin is too thick!” You sob out, nearing complete exhaustion. Then, just as you’re about to collapse from exhaustion, gunshots fill the room.

Nancy begins to shoot at the monster and with the help of your blades, the two of you manage to pierce its skin, but even then the damage is minimal. It’s not enough, it won’t be enough. Tears stream down your face and the monster only gets closer to Jonathan, so you do the only thing you can think of: you crawl onto the top of its body and stab at its mouth.

The monster lets out a blood curdling scream and flings you off of its back. You go flying across the room and land against the wall with a groan. All the air has been knocked out of you and your ribs are definitely going to be bruised tomorrow. Every part of you aches, but you manage to lift your head up and blearily process the monster now approaching Nancy as she continues to shoot at it, but it remains unphased.

You crawl over to Jonathan, who is still laying on the ground. He’s motionless, and you fight everything within you not to break down and sob. You have to keep going, he has to be alive. As you reach Jonathan and frantically check for a pulse, the monster has now cornered Nancy and her gun seems to be out of bullets.

It’s over. You know it is.

Right as you’ve accepted your fate, a screaming Steve Harrington wielding Jonathan’s bat once again manages to save the day.

He hits the monster with the bat, effectively saving Nancy and you’re so impressed with his batting skills that you almost find him attractive with how easily he hits and dodges the monster. However, you file those thoughts away for later and finally manage to wake Jonathan up. He startles with a gasp and you check over his chest, scared he may have gotten pierced by the monster’s claws.

“I’m fine, we need to help.”

You help each other up and you have to lean heavily against him due to your ankle. You bull riding the monster has only made the sprain worse; you’re too afraid to look down and see the damage that’s been done.

As the two of you hobble over to Nancy, Jonathan looks at you. “Is Harrington really here right now?”

“Yes.”

“Lovely.”

Steve manages to lure the monster closer and closer to the bear trap and you watch him in awe. He’s quick footed and so sure of himself, the complete opposite of the boy from only ten minutes ago who had run out of the house screaming his head off. Now, Steve is swift with his hits and even twirls the bat in his hand to show off. The small act causes you to smile despite the horrible circumstances.

By the time you and Jonathan are up and recovered, Steve has successfully led the monster straight into the trap. It clamps around the monster’s foot and it screeches, flailing around in the trap. Steve still has his bat held up, now frantically looking over to everyone else. “He’s in the trap! He’s stuck!”

“Jonathan, now!” Nancy screams, motioning over at him to use his lighter.

Jonathan listens, using his free hand to flick the lighter on and then drops it onto the ground, right into the trail of gasoline. Immediately the monster goes up in flames, letting out horrible noises. You all shield your faces from the flames and Jonathan pulls you closer into him, still having yet to let go of you; you feel yourself sink into his side as you watch the monster wither away.

“Bug, I have to get the fire extinguisher, do you think you can stand on your own?” Jonathan asks you, his voice soft but urgent.

You quickly nod and brace yourself for his departure. “Yeah, go.”

He lets go of you as gently as possible before running to grab the extinguisher. When he has it, he orders everyone to get back and then smothers the flames. It takes a couple seconds, but eventually the fire gets put out, leaving behind an awful stench that makes everyone cough and gag.

“Holy fuck,” you wheeze out, hunched over. “Burnt monster smells horrible.”

“Yeah, no kidding.” Steve coughs out.

Nancy covers her face with her jacket. “Where did it go?”

“It has to be dead.” Jonathan pants against the wall, looking like he’s three seconds away from passing out. “It has to be.”

“It fucking better be dead.” You mumble, hobbling closer to see what exactly was left behind. When you get closer and see the giant lump of melted skin all over the bear trap, you gag. “Oh god. Yeah, okay. It’s dead.”

Everyone sighs with relief.

Then, you notice a Christmas light above you flicker on. Your heart stops, terrified that the monster has somehow survived, but then a second one turns on, then a third, until a path seems to be guiding you towards the living room.

You all follow, cautious but curious, but these lights don’t feel threatening. There’s an energy to them, a comforting one that leaves you breathless. When you get to the living room, tears form in your eyes, now understanding what this all is. You look at Jonathan, who also seems to be thinking what you are.

It’s Joyce, you know it is.

“Mom,” he breathes out.

You limp over to him and grab his hand. He turns to you, his eyes shining with an appreciation that he only ever has for you. He seems to be drinking you in, as if now realizing just how close the two of you came to dying tonight. You’re doing the same, thankful that he’s alive and standing next to you despite everything. There’s so much the two of you want to say, but as always the words aren’t needed. You understand each other perfectly, the balance between you centered once more.

You put your head on Jonathan’s shoulder and he brings his hand to your hair to softly stroke it. The two of you stand like that for a second, breathing each other in and enjoying the tenderness after such a miserable day, before you slowly break apart and follow the lights going outside.

The porch light flickers and Nancy stands next to you, watching it with uncertainty. “Where’s it going?”

“I don’t think it’s the monster.” Jonathan tells her.

“It’s Will.” You don’t know how you know this, or what makes you feel so certain that you’re right, but somehow you know that you are. Somewhere deep within you, you feel the faint outline of hope flicker.

A new silence surrounds the four of you at your words, and for once there’s hope between you all. Then, after a minute or so of silence, everyone begins to head back inside. Steve first, then Nancy, and finally Jonathan, leaving you alone with the crisp early winter air.

You take a deep breath, the cold air serving as a reminder that you’re alive. You let it fill your lungs until you can’t breathe in anymore, then you release the air through an exhale and feel your body settle into its exhaustion. This is the first time you’ve had a moment to yourself, so you let the exhaustion weigh upon you like a warm blanket.

Will is safe, you can feel it. Despite everything, he’s safe and alive. Jonathan is too, still your best friend regardless of all the unspoken words between the two of you. Dustin is at the school with the kids, away from danger. Everything is okay, it’ll be okay.

You let the moment wash over you, incredibly grateful to be lucky enough to have survived it all. Everyone you love and hold close to you is safe. You didn’t fuck up this time. God, you did it.

Jonathan comes running out after a while, his face alight with joy and he crashes into you and picks you up to twirl you around. You laugh, loud and freely, and bury your face in his hair as he continues. “Bee, stop! Put me down, you dummy!”

He does as he’s told, but doesn’t let go of you once your feet are on the ground. “My mom just called, they saved Will. He–he’s in the hospital, he’s okay.”

You squeal and throw your arms around Jonathan again, squeezing him so hard that you’re afraid you'll hurt him, but he simply laughs and squeezes you just as tight. Tears come again, but this time they’re happy ones, and if it weren’t for your ankle you’d be jumping up and down right now.

Jonathan’s laughter dies down and he cups your chin around his fingers so that you look up at him. “You did it.”

“We did it, bug.” You softly push against him. You can’t take all the credit.

His eyes are shining again, you haven’t seen him this happy in so long, you get lost in it. His face is lit up and his smile is back and you’re so in love with him that it claws against your throat and threatens to spill out in excess.

A beat of silence passes and Jonathan just soaks your presence in. You can’t quite read his face, but for once this doesn’t frighten you. You enjoy it, you relish in the fact that he’s still yours yet now forming into someone new and lovely and wonderful.

“You never gave up.” He whispers at last, adoration in his voice.

“Never.”

“You never left me.”

“Never.” You breathe out, the word so simple with such heavy weight behind it.

The moment is so raw, so tender, and Jonathan is giving you that look again, the one that leaves you feeling like the sun itself has settled upon you and kissed your cheek. His eyes flick down to your lips and you smile, taunting him to lean in. He seems to understand, giving you his own teasing smile before leaning in. You lean in as well, every part of you buzzing, and right before your lips touch his, Steve bursts through the door.

“Jonathan, dude, do you have like, any food in the house?” He asks, completely oblivious to what he’s just interrupted.

You and Jonathan break apart, laughing the tension away. He ducks his head down, clears his throat, and turns to Steve. “Sorry, man. Been a little busy this week for grocery shopping.”

Steve’s eyes bulge out of his head. “Oh shit, right. Sorry, okay. Uh… Well, I’ll be inside, I guess.”

“We’ll be in shortly.” You tell Steve. You want to be frustrated by his timing, but something tells you that you’ll have all the time in the world to tell Jonathan how you feel. Now just isn’t the time.

–

The moment you arrive at the hospital, Jonathan sprints out of the car and straight towards the front desk to find out where Will is. You and Nancy follow behind, figuring you won’t be able to see Will for a while since you’re not blood related, so the two of you wish Jonathan goodbye and head towards the waiting room.

Steve lags behind, obviously unsure where to go. Nancy immediately walks inside, but you notice his hesitation and nudge his shoulder. “I’m sure that the cut on your eyebrow needs to be looked out. Let’s go sit, okay?”

He sighs deeply. “Yeah, sure. Totally. Let’s go sit in a room full of people who probably hate me. No biggie.”

“Either come or don’t.” You shrug. “But the way I see it, you can start mending some metaphorical wounds while you wait in there.”

You don’t wait for Steve to figure out what to do, you know that Dustin is somewhere inside the waiting room and you’re buzzing to see him and the rest of the kids. You hobble inside, still very much in pain due to your injuries, but the moment you see your brother it all fades away.

He runs into your arms and almost knocks you down with the force. Dustin clings onto you, mumbling over and over again how sorry he is.

“Hey, wait a second,” you pull him away and crouch down, groaning a bit at the pain. “What are you sorry about? What happened?”

You look around the room and see everyone there. Nancy, Hopper, the kids, Steve, even Nancy’s parents, but there’s someone missing…

“El,” you breathe out.

Dustin’s lip trembles and he begins to cry. You soothe him, grabbing his hand to bring him over to the seats and sit between him and Mike. Lucas is to the left of Dustin and you can’t help but notice how all the boys have dried tears in their eyes.

When they’re ready, you have the kids explain what happened, and the more they tell you, the more guilty you feel. You should’ve been there for them, you left them all alone with that monster. You got Will back, and yet you’ve lost El as a result. It seems that no matter what you do, it’ll never quite be enough in the end.

“It’s not your fault.” You tell Dustin, who still keeps apologizing. It was you who had left him in charge, you’re why El ended up vanquished by the monster. “You did everything you could. I shouldn’t have left you guys all alone, but I’m proud that you all took care of one another, okay?”

He sniffs and nods his head, but you know he doesn’t believe you. All the boys are somber; you know it’ll take time for them to recover. So, you do what you do best, you console them. You hold their hands and rub their backs and offer your spare comics in your bag. You do whatever you can to comfort them, to reassure them that they’re safe now and that no one will hurt them, but the light in their eyes has dimmed.

They’ll never be the same again.

And El… she had been so young, you don’t think you’ll ever not feel the heavy weight of guilt whenever you think of her. She had been so sweet and had trusted you.

You should’ve been there, you wish you could’ve saved her.

Steve watches from his seat across from you. He listens in as you comfort the boys, taking care of them in such a natural way. He admires this softer side of you, one he hasn’t quite seen before. Sure, you’ve always been gentle and sincere, but watching you with the kids is something special in itself. You manage to get them to laugh, you offer them your shoulder to cry or sleep on, and you read aloud to them stories from your comics and Steve finds himself drawn towards your interactions with the kids.

It’s sweet, something delicate and lovely, and Steve admires everything that you are. When he sees you awkwardly stand up and stumble over to the vending machines in the hall, Steve finds himself following after you.

“Bitch!” You slam the palm of your hand against the vending machine in vain. The bag of chips hangs by the little spiral, taunting you.

“That’s not a very nice word, Henderson.”

You turn and see Steve, leaning against the wall with a fond expression. “You stalking me?”

“Nah, just wanted to watch you fight against a vending machine.”

“Ha,” you snort, turning back to the machine. “Unless you can help me get this last chip bag, you’re free to go sit back down.”

You mean it to be a joke, not expecting Steve to actually listen, but he’s at your side within a second. “Step back, let Steve handle her.”

“What–”

Steve motions for you to move, so you reluctantly do as you’re told. Once you’re out of the way, Steve claps his hands, stretches out his neck, and then begins to aggressively shake the vending machine.

“That is so not what you’re supposed to do–”

Suddenly the bag drops down from the hook and into the retrieval slot. Steve reaches inside, grabs the bag, and then dangles it in the air. “Tada!”

You laugh and grab the bag from him. “Okay, I’ll admit, that was impressive.”

“What can I say? I’m charming like that.”

“Sure,” you smile at him, neither of you have moved yet. He’s still standing in front of you with that cocky smile on his face that’s slowly started to warm on you. You truly do understand why so many girls have fallen for him. If you ever saw Steve on the street, a stranger passing by, you’d fall a little bit in love with him yourself.

The thought startles you. “Well, uh…”

“Yes?” Steve raises his eyebrows at you, smiling.

“Thank you for the chips. The kids haven’t eaten anything in hours, so…” You wave the three bags in your arms. “Gotta keep 'em fed.”

“Wait a second, there’s only three bags there. Aren’t you going to eat anything?”

“I only had enough money for the boy’s chips.” You say, feeling suddenly sheepish. “It’s fine, though. I’ll just eat a few pieces from them and wait until we get home.”

Steve scoffs. “Yeah, no.”

You frown at him, confused as he rustles through his jean pocket and pulls out his wallet. “I don’t want your money–”

He doesn’t listen and simply puts the cash into the vending machine and punches in a few numbers. Slowly, one by one, multiple different bags of sweets and chips come falling down within the machine. Once the last one has dropped, Steve bends down and offers the huge stash to you.

“A feast, on me.” He winks at you and you can’t help but blush.

“T–thanks, I guess.” You now carefully balance the rest of the snacks in your arms, the mound almost blocking your view. You’re not sure how much Steve just paid, but with all these snacks you and the kids will surely be well fed.

Steve shrugs, and if you weren’t so tired you’d think the blush on his face was a real one. “It’s the least I can do, all things considered.”

His words give you pause. You know he’s referencing earlier today, back in the alley where fists slammed against skin and he had dragged you away from your best friend, but the memory feels like years ago. So much has happened since then, Steve has saved your life since then.

“Steve…” Your ankle is starting to sting again from standing for so long, so you adjust your footing and try to figure out what you want to say. “I never got to thank you back at Jonathan’s.”

“Thank me?” His face scrunches in confusion in a sickeningly cute way that it almost distracts you.

“Yes. You saved my life tonight, Steve. I won’t ever forget that.”

“Oh…There’s no need to thank me. I mean, what are friends for?” Steve freezes and clears his throat. “I mean, shit. We aren’t friends, you keep saying that. Sorry. You know what I mean.”

You know you shouldn’t, but you laugh. Honestly, after everything you’ve been through tonight with Steve, how can he possibly think the two of you aren’t friends?

“Why are you laughing?” Steve mumbles, confused.

“Sorry,” you wheeze out, still uncontrollably laughing. “It’s just–I mean, dude! We almost died together, of course we’re friends now!”

“We are?” He looks like a little kid on Christmas day being given the gift he’s always wanted.

Your heart warms. “Yes, idiot.”

Steve starts moving around in what you can only guess is a happy dance. “Sweet! Does this mean I get a cool nickname, too?”

“A nickname?” A bag of chips threatens to fall from your arms, but Steve catches it before it can land on the ground and takes a few more snacks off of your hands.

He readjusts the snacks he now has so that he can carry them easier. “Yeah, I mean. Byers has one, why can’t I?”

You don’t think you’ll ever stop feeling so thrown every time Steve mentions a small detail about you that he’s somehow come to notice. He has a habit of doing that, surprising you by how much he seems to pay attention to you. You thought that no one ever had before, but Steve continues to prove you wrong.

“I’ll tell ya what,” you begin to walk back towards the waiting room, careful to step carefully to not drop anything or upset your ankle. “Let’s see how this ‘friends’ thing works out, then I’ll decide what nickname fits you best. Deal?”

Steve thinks for a moment and follows. “Hmm. I don’t know, I think I’ll need some type of precaution to make sure you give me a nickname in the end. I want one, Y/N. I’m so serious right now.”

You laugh at his pleading tone. “I can add you to my baking list. Whatever I bake, you’ll get a piece of it. Is that better?”

“God, yes!” Steve punches the air and cheers.

You’re smiling so much that your face aches. You haven’t felt this light and carefree in so long, you’d almost forgotten what it’s like. The two of you don’t say anything else as you walk back to the waiting room, though Steve seems to slow down so that you don’t hurt your ankle keeping up, though you still let out a few winces and groans.

When you’ve arrived back at your seat, Steve sets down the snacks and runs off without another word. You’re confused by his sudden departure but don’t think much of it. Instead, you wake the boys up and show them your array of snacks, which wakes them up immediately.

You’re mediating a fight between Mike and Lucas over who gets the bag of Chips Ahoy when a nurse interrupts. “Excuse me, ma’am. This young man over here told me I should come over and check out your ankle?”

The woman smiles and you look past her and see Steve sheepishly waving from his seat across from you. You’re stunned. Had he really gone out of his way to ensure your ankle gets treated?

You shake the thoughts out of your head and inform the woman all she needs to know. You tell her how you’d fallen and what type of pain you feel when you stand up. She inspects the ankle, her fingers cold but kind, and within a few minutes has diagnosed you with a sprained ankle.

“All you can really do is stay off of it for a few weeks while it heals. I can go and get you some crutches, if you’d like?” She asks, rolling her gloves off and tucking them back into her pocket.

You nod. “If you wouldn’t mind, that’d be great.”

The nurse leaves with the promise of being back soon. In the meantime she instructs you to keep your ankle elevated, so you prop it against the coffee table and wait. You’re annoyed that you even have to have crutches, but then you think of Barb, of El. You’re luckier than you should be.

–

After an hour or so, Jonathan opens the door to the waiting room. He spots you and Mike talking softly with each other and whistles over to catch your attention. When Mike looks up, Jonathan nods at him and the boy scrambles out of his seat.

“Guys! Guys! He’s up, Will is up!” Mike shakes awake Lucas and Dustin, who had been cuddling on the seats fast asleep. “Will’s up!”

Once they’re awake, they quickly follow after Mike and the three boys are gone in an instant, sprinting down the hall towards Will’s room. Clearly they’re eager to see their friend.

You do your best to get up as fast as possible, but your new crutches serve more as a nuisance rather than an aid. As you struggle to get up, somehow knocking over the mountain of snacks, Steve rushes over.

He grabs the crutches and offers you his hand. “Here, careful.”

“Thanks,” you awkwardly accept his hand and get up. Jonathan watches from the doorway, a curious look on his face. Nancy does the same from her seat, not saying a word as she watches Steve gently help you navigate the waiting room with your injury.

Jonathan holds the door open for you and takes over once you’re out the door. He grabs the crutches from Steve and is now the one to hold your hand, balancing you. “I can take it from here, Harrington.”

“Right, yeah.” Steve scratches the back of his head and coughs. “I’ll just… yeah.”

He heads back inside and you and Jonathan watch as he leaves. As soon as he’s out of earshot, Jonathan turns to you. “Are you two friends now or something?”

“We almost died tonight, bee. I think it’s safe to call Steve a friend now.”

Jonathan bites his lip, though there’s a far off look in his eye that leaves you feeling like you’ve missed something in the conversation. “Guess that’s true. Anyways, let’s get you to Will.”

By the time you make it to the room, the boys have swarmed around Will and are telling him everything he’s missed this week. He’s listening eagerly as they’re telling him about El, but when he sees you enter the room, his eyes light up and he tries to sit up.

“Y/N!” Will calls out, pure excitement in his voice.

You practically fall over in your haste to get to him. The second you’re close enough, you collapse onto his bed and give him the tightest hug you possibly can without hurting him. He feels so small against you, smaller than he’s ever felt before, and his sunken eyes and pale skin make you want to cry.

But he’s alive and here and in your arms once again, happy and wonderful and safe.

“Little bee,” you try not to cry, but tears are thick in your voice. “I missed you.”

Will manages a weak smile and shrugs, trying to play off the gravity of the situation. “Took a little detour home.”

You laugh and ruffle his hair. “At least you came home, that’s all that matters.”

“Ahem,” Mike obnoxiously clears his throat, effectively ending your moment with Will. “You’re hogging Will, move over.”

You laugh again and move away, allowing the boys to resume their millions of updates. You maneuver your crutches and walk over to Jonathan, who is standing by the door. He’s looking at the boys and Will with a soft smile on his face and you join him, standing side by side as you watch your boys finally come together again.

Then, you feel a pair of eyes on you and you turn around. Nancy is leaning against the doorway behind you; she looks frail and distraught. There’s a sadness in her eyes as she watches the kids. You know that watching the boys reunite with their friend must remind her of Barb. She never got her happy reunion.

You feel awful for the girl, so when her bittersweet smile drops and she turns to leave the room, you nudge Jonathan to make him aware of the situation. He sees her fleeing and begins to follow after her, but he stops.

“What are you waiting for? Go.” You tell him, knowing it’s for the best.

He shifts his weight, uncertain. “Are you sure?”

You’re not sure how to decipher the hidden meanings underneath those three words, but you find that you’re exhausted trying to keep reading between the lines. The feelings you’ve kept buried bubble to the surface, but you remind yourself that he loves Nancy, despite your weird moments of almost with him. There’s something there between you and Jonathan, you both can feel it, but it feels too raw and fragile to bring into the light.

Without having to ask, you know that Jonathan will choose her.

It breaks your heart, but you look over at Dustin and Will, who are laughing about some joke while Joyce gazes at them fondly, and you know that you can’t lose this. Maybe Jonathan knows this, too. The small family you’ve built together, it’s too precious to ruin.

Joyce and your boys, you can’t lose them. They’re yours, and Jonathan is yours in a way that you can’t quite keep to yourself forever, but for now it’s enough. You approach Joyce, grab her hand and give her a tired smile, and the smile she returns to you reminds you that this is more than enough for you.

You turn to Jonathan, pushing down your feelings once more in favor of appreciating the fact that Will is looking at you again, alive. “Go, bee.”

Jonathan gives you one last look. You study his face for a moment, watching as it shifts from confusion, to hurt, then finally into acceptance. You’ll never be sure of what exactly he’d been thinking in that moment, but it seemed to have been enough for him, too.

He smiles, lets out a deep breath, and then leaves.

The door closes softly behind him.

–

A month later you find yourself in the passenger seat of Jonathan's car, tired from your shift at Bookstrordinary but excited to pick up your brothers. Somehow, even after missing three consecutive shifts last month, Mrs. Waters refused to fire you.

But Jonathan? He hadn’t been so lucky. His boss fired him from the Hawk, but he hadn’t been too upset. He still drives you to and from work, so you suppose things could be worse.

It’s late, but the two of you take your time driving to the Wheeler’s. Nothing much has changed between you two following Will’s reappearance. Sure, maybe you’re at his house more just to make sure Will is adapting well, but besides that everything seemed to go back to normal.

Well, almost normal.

Steve appeared at your job a few days after your conversation in the hospital. He had surprised you when you walked in, and when you asked what he was doing in a bookstore, Steve simply shrugged and said, “You can’t figure out my nickname if we don’t hang out, right? So, I’m here.”

He had become a regular at the store, stopping by whenever he could, and slowly the two of you became good friends. You’ve come to enjoy Steve’s presence, something that you never thought would ever happen. But he keeps you company as you work, he wanders around and explores the comics and books you recommend to him, and it’s nice having someone to goof off with.

Plus, you did promise to add him to your baking list, so he’s also become your taste tester who happily eats any creation you bring in for him.

As for Nancy…

That was more of a sore subject for Jonathan.

There was a few weeks following Will’s reappearance that you thought Jonathan and Nancy would get together, but it never happened. You’re not quite sure why, maybe it had something to do with Jonathan’s hesitation of approaching her, but it had crushed him when you and he saw Nancy and Steve making out in the hall as if nothing bad had ever happened.

The way Jonathan’s face crumbled when he saw the couple only solidified that he’d never be yours, but you comforted him anyways. You told him he deserved better and then dragged him away. It’d taken him a few days, but eventually Jonathan was able to fake a smile again.

You haven’t spoken about it since that day, but you leave your window open most nights for him to crawl in. The nightmares from that night fighting the monster plague you both, and the loneliness feels a little heavier than usual, but at least you have each other.

“Jonathan! Y/N! Come in, the boys are downstairs.” Mrs. Wheeler answers the door, letting the two of you in. “And Y/N, I love that sweater on you.”

You thank the woman. “It was a gift from my mom. She claims I need to up my wardrobe, whatever that means.”

“Well, I think she has lovely taste.”

“I’ll let you know you think so!” You open the basement door and motion for Jonathan to go down first.

When he reaches the bottom of the steps, Jonathan makes a face. “Woah, what’s that smell? Have you guys been playing games all day, or just farting?”

“My vote is farting.” You say, hopping down the last step. Your ankle has mostly healed by now, but sometimes if you land on it wrong it makes a weird clicking noise followed by some pain, but you choose to pretend that it’s normal.

The boys laugh and Lucas points at your brother. “Oh, that’s just Dustin. He farted.”

He begins making fart noises with his mouth and you and Dustin share a look. “Very mature, Lucas.”

The boy continues to sing and make fart noises and you can’t believe that this is your life. You’re standing in a smelly basement while picking up your stubborn brother all while simultaneously enjoying the fact that you get to call this your life.

Jonathan calls over to Will to grab his things, so you follow suit and gently berate Lucas. “Alright, that’s enough. I gotta get Dustin home.”

“What, I thought I got to stay–”

“Jonathan is our ride and I made cookies, so let’s go.”

The moment the word “cookies” leaves your mouth, Dustin hops up and collects his things without any further argument.

Once he’s ready, he and Lucas play wrestle as they say goodbye. While they’re distracted, you walk over to Mike and discreetly hand him a container full of double fudge brownies. You’d specifically made them for him, knowing they were his favorite, because you noticed how hard it’s been for him to adjust to El being gone. He really cared about her, anyone could see that.

Mike’s eyes widen and he throws his arms around you. “Thanks, Y/N.”

You pat his back. “Anytime, Wheeler.”

Dustin breaks away from Lucas and runs up the stairs, so you take that as your cue to leave.

Upstairs, Jonathan and Will are talking to Mrs. Wheeler. When they see you enter, the woman turns to you and asks if you’ll be bringing over your usual round of holiday treats. “Of course, I’ll get started on them tomorrow. You guys still like the sugarbread cookies?”

“If you make them, I think I’ll die of happiness.” Mrs. Wheeler informs you, and you laugh and tell her that you’ll have them ready as soon as possible.

You bid her goodbye, Dustin now by your side, and you follow Jonathan and Will to the front door. Right before you open the door, Nancy calls Jonathan’s name from the top of the stairs.

“Hey, Jonathan, wait up!”

You, Dustin, and Will stand awkwardly in the back while Nancy hands Jonathan a wrapped gift and wishes him a merry Christmas. They share an awkward exchange since Jonathan hadn’t gotten her anything, but Nancy assures him that it’s fine. The interaction is painful to watch as Nancy doesn’t spare you a single glance. Dustin and Will look at you uncertainly when she kisses Jonathan’s cheek, but you ignore them and pretend to be interested in a Christmas decoration on the table.

This will never get any easier.

“You ready?” Jonathan turns back to you guys, a blush on his face, and all you can do is silently nod.

In the car you sit in the back with Dustin, who squeezes your arm in reassurance. He’s come to understand your complex feelings for Jonathan and has pieced together Nancy’s involvement. While he’s never outright consoled you, he’s shown his support in other small and wonderful ways.

“Thanks,” you whisper, and Dustin smiles.

“We all buckled up?” Jonathan asks as he starts up the car.

“Yes, captain.” You mock salute.

Will giggles at you before he sees the gift and looks up at Jonathan. “Can I open it?”

“Yeah, sure.”

You and Dustin lean forward so you can see what’s in the box. When Will unwraps a beautiful, and no doubt expensive, camera, you gasp. The bitterness and hurt from moments ago vanishes. This gift is from Steve, you know it is, and something warm settles deep within your bones.

You think about last month, how you’d told him not everyone can just afford a camera.

Seems like Steve listened.

Maybe he isn’t so bad after all.

–

A week later you knock on the Byers’ door, a giant container of your annual holiday cookies in your arms.

“Bug!” Jonathan answers the door with an excited smile on his face. His new camera is in his hands and before you can even process what’s happening, he’s already taken a photo of you with your crooked earmuffs and oversized box of cookies.

He’s been using the camera ever since he got it. There’s now multiple pictures of you, always unaware or caught off guard, now hanging in the kitchen. It makes you blush to think about.

“You didn’t even give me a chance to smile.” You complain, shoving your way inside. It’s snowing and you’re freezing.

Joyce grabs the container to help you as soon as she sees you. “Here, honey. I’ve got it.”

You thank her and walk over to Will, who is drawing at the kitchen table. “Hey little bee. Whatcha drawing?”

“Hi, Y/N.” He slides over his picture and you’re shown a quick sketch of you and the party, this time fighting what appears to be a misshapen dog. “It’s a Dire Wolf, we’re fighting it in our latest campaign.”

“Ah, I see. Looks fluffy, though. Can’t possibly be a dangerous creature.”

Will rolls his eyes at you. “This is why you don’t play with us.”

“Careful, you’re sassing the girl who has just bravely ridden her bike through the snow to deliver her famous Christmas cookies.”

Will is out of his seat in an instant, running over to his mom, who has just placed the container on the counter. “Did you make the oatmeal raisin cookies?”

“Duh,” you snort.

“And the chocolate chip?”

“I sure did.” You stand next to him and point at a new cookie you’re trying out this year. “This batch is a caramel banana one. Steve seemed to like it and I think it’s pretty good, so I hope you do too.”

Jonathan swoops over and kisses your head. “Of course we’ll like it, bug.”

“He’s right, you know. We always love whatever you make us, honey.” Joyce informs you, her mouth now full of cookies.

“I’d hope so, this is like my fifth year making these for you guys. It’d be awkward if you hated my baking.” You say, now securing your earmuffs back on your head. “Anyways, I should get going. It’s Christmas, my mom won’t want me out too long.”

Joyce looks out the window and frowns. “Did you really bike here in this weather?”

“It wasn’t too bad, I’ll be fine–”

“No. Jonathan, grab your keys and drive Y/N home.” She stares you down, daring you to argue with her, but you don’t. You know better than to argue with Joyce Byers.

Once Jonathan has his keys, you say goodbye to everyone and wish them a merry Christmas. Jonathan throws your bike in his trunk and soon you’re off on the road. The drive is quiet but cozy. The snowflakes fall in a pretty spiral and there’s a soft song playing on the radio.

Sometimes, if you close your eyes, you can pretend that the events from last month never happened. Will never disappeared. You never discovered that you love Jonathan. Nancy Wheeler never became friends with Jonathan, possibly something more had there been more time. When you close your eyes and sit still, you can imagine that your brother never has nightmares that wake him up screaming. That your heart doesn’t hurt when you make your best friend laugh.

For a moment, you can forget.

“Can we always stay like this?” You ask Jonathan softly, almost as if you’ll disturb the peace that winter has brought with its quiet snow.

“Like what?”

You’re not sure how to express what you’re feeling. “This, us. Together.”

“Of course we’ll always stay like this.” He grabs your hand, bringing it to his lips to kiss it. He says this like it’s a fact, the most obvious thing in the world.

“Pinky promise me.” You hold your pinky up. You know it’s silly, but you need him to hear you, to understand what you’re saying.

Jonathan looks over at you. “Y/N–”

“Please, promise me, bee.”

He’s silent for a moment, seeming to understand the weight of everything between, around, and within the two of you. Then, he extends his pinky finger and wraps it around yours. “I promise, bug.”

And you believe him.

[END OF SEASON 1]

⌑ series masterlist

⌑ if you'd like to be added/removed from my taglist, please just left me know !

taglist: @siriuslysmoking @sheisjoeschateau @myeclispedsun @innercreationflower @juhdoche @frostandflamesfanfic @goosy-goose @quinnsadilla @munsons-queen @stefansring

#steve harrington x henderson!reader #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #stranger things #steve harrington fanfic #stranger things rewrite #slowburn #angst #wdtai #m's writing #im so tired n happy and full of love for u all #cannot believe its done :')#pls pls pls enjoy <333

503 notes · View notes

emjiroki · 1 year ago

Text

Pool Boy Yuuta Okkotsu x Lonely Housewife Reader

Word Count: 1.7k

Warnings: Infidelity, exhibitionism (outside), Yuuta is the lonely housewife slayer fight me

A/N: I'm back babies with Pool boy Yuuta for the lovely Wet Hot Slimeball summer block party collab event! My prompt was 'Humid' so I hope I captured the theme and everyone enjoys! @bastardblvd (look at Yuuta holding the pool skimmer! Im pretty proud of my editing skills)

Collab Masterlist

likes, reblogs, and comments are much appreciated

‘God they need to do something about this global warming shit’ You thought as the sun beat down. It had been storming over the last week in Grimetown so the humidity was intense; thick like you were being compressed and forced to breathe the water evaporating from the ground. And with the storms came strong winds, knocking small branches and a whole heap of leaves into the once pristine blue water of your pool. You had made plans to clean it out…soon, maybe ask that big man that stole your package and stuffed that block party flier in your mailbox to fix it, had really planned to ask your husband to do it before he left for two weeks on a “business trip”. It would be comical to believe that these trips were for business at this point, your husband coming home one too many times smelling of perfume that wasn’t the scent you wore. Something cheap and cloying that set a stone in your stomach. But you liked your life, all your bills were paid and your husband still treated you like you were his world, why bother rocking the boat over some whore? He’ll get bored with her eventually and come crawling back, take you on some big vacation as a secret sorry and it’ll be done with.

So here you were lounging on one of your pool chaises trying and failing to read your book with your brain a frenzy of thoughts when you vaguely heard a knock on the gate. You pulled on the slipcover for your bikini and went to open the hefty latch to the privacy fence. The sudden heat to your skin wasn’t from the sun beating down or the suffocating humidity, but most certainly from the man in front of you with a pool skimmer propped up on his shoulder.

“I’m Yuuta Okkotsu from Grimetown Pool and Landscaping, sorry for the intrusion but I tried the front door and no one answered”. He seemed about your age, maybe a year or two younger, with sweet dark eyes and a handsomely cut jaw. Obviously fit under the company t-shirt that hugged his body. You bit your cheek slightly to try and keep your thoughts in check and not written across your face as you extended your hand to his to shake and introduced yourself.

“I’m guessing you’re the poor soul that they sent to come clean my disaster of pool?” You asked opening the gate a bit wider for him.

“That’s what was on my schedule for today ma’am,” He said with a sheepish smile as he fumbled to close the gate latch behind him and followed you over to the poolside.

“And in this humidity too? Yikes,” You empathized, taking a discarded magazine from the table and fanning yourself as he surveyed the mess.

“This will probably take a day or two to clean out and get balanced again,” Yuuta said with a determined look set on his face.

“Please, take all the time you need” You requested, pulling the slip from your bikini off, “I’m assuming the husband will just write a check for whatever”.

“R-Right, of course” He stammered, a rosy hue to his cheeks as he not so subtly looked you up and down. But he didn’t look away from your gaze when you made eye contact, going so far as to take a small step forward. You gave him a soft alluring smile before slipping your sunglasses on and lounging back in your chair.

“This humidity is a killer, let me know if you need anything” You commented as he pulled his phone from his pocket, assumedly to call his boss and tell them the plan.

“Oh I will, don’t worry,” He said with a lowkey promise in his tone that had you clenching.

♡

An hour or two passed as he pulled out branches and skimmed the pool, the humidity absolutely baring down and making the air thick. You were glad for the sunglasses because you couldn’t help but stare when he stripped off his shirt. Sweat ran down his neck to the dip in his collarbones before rolling down his chest and chiseled abdomen, your eyes tracing the wet path down as you unconsciously clenched your legs together. You reached for your drink and realized the glass was empty, the ice slowly melting at the bottom.

“Yuuta, would you like a drink? Take a break in the a/c for a minute?” You called over as you gather your stuff to head back inside away from this killer heat.

“Sure that would be great” He replied, pulling the skimmer from the water and setting it aside before quickly following you as you lead him in through the back door to the kitchen. The cool was a relief from the stagnant heat hovering around outside, Yuuta gratefully taking the towel you handed him and wiped his face and neck.

“Water? Lemonade?” You asked as you opened the refrigerator, pulling the pitcher out and refilling your own glass.

“Lemonade is great, thanks” He huffed as he sat back in one of the bar chairs, pushing his damp black hair back away from his face. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t ogle for a moment, quickly turning away when looked up at you and filled the glass you pulled down for him. He said thank you again as you handed it to him, watching as he took a few big gulps of the cold liquid, his Adam's apple bobbing as he drank greedily.

“You know Yuuta, I really wish my husband had a job like yours,” You commented, taking the seat next to him.

“Oh? And why’s that?” He asked, surprise in his tone but something curious and almost heated sparkling in his dark eyes. Damn, how could he be this pretty?

“Well, he’s always gone and I think the finance industry is making him dishonest” You admitted, casually messing with your discarded sunglasses on the island. The worst has already happened, at this point, you didn’t care about throwing yourself out there as you gently touched his fingers resting next to yours.

“I’d be dishonest too if I got a house like this and a wife like you” He commented, a rosy hue to his cheeks though he didn't pull his hand away when you expected him to.

“But the house is always so empty, it's lonely here… all by myself,” You said tracing one of your manicured nails up his hand to his forearm, goosebumps breaking across his skin, “He gives me everything I want but nothing that I need”. Yuuta turned slightly, leaning in close enough that a gasp escaped you, his dark eyes swimming with something you wanted to be devoured by.

“And what is it that you need?” He murmured, his lips close enough that you would only have to lean in an inch or two to feel them against yours, “Love? Good dick?”. It felt as if someone had lit a fire in your cheeks and it was rapidly traveling to the spot between your legs, your breath not filling your lungs anymore as his hand moved to your bare thigh. Your hands were shaking as you tried to take a drink from your glass, a small splash of lemonade running down your mouth to your chest. You squeaked out a soft moan when you felt his warm tongue against your skin, his mouth following the sour liquid down to the curve of your breast and sucking lightly in a soft kiss. Gripping his arms to keep yourself steady, he smiled up at you, that seemingly innocent shy boy smile from earlier. “Is that a yes?”.

♡

“Yuuta! Fuck!” You cried as he bottomed out inside of you for what seemed like the hundredth time today, you both barely able to get out of your bed this morning.

“You really never get tired do you?” He said with a chuckle, hissing as your walls squeezed around him, “Can’t even get my job done”. He’s right, hadn’t even gotten the chemicals ready for the pool before he was spread on the chaise lounge for you again, your thong bikini shredded by his eager hands and thrown somewhere in the yard. You were both slick with sweat from the heat, humidity ever present as you devoured each other for your neighbors on both sides to hear. His hands were rough against your ass as he squeezed and help you along to take his length, your hands on his sweaty chest as you bounced, spearing yourself on him again and again like you were possessed.

“You’re just… so good” You moaned as he pulled you down to press against him, nipping his teeth across your throat and thrusting up into you.

“Oh, you’re so good too beautiful, so fucking hot” He groaned, feeling your slick leaking out and running down to coat his balls in creamy white. He was so deep inside, carving out a place only his cock could satisfy, rutting into your soft walls like an animal. You couldn’t get enough as you moved your hips against his, his hand going up to wipe the drool from your lips as you fell apart.

“With a pussy like this I might just get obsessed,” He said his voice turning to a growl as you raised up again, his dark eyes seeming to grow darker as he watched your breasts bounce and the sweat rolling down your skin. “But you’d like that, wouldn’t you?”. You nodded, groaning out a soft yes as the flames of your climax licked up your spine, your brain foggy with the heat and the pleasure buzzing through your bloodstream. If only your “husband” could see you right now, being ravaged into a puddle in this primal humidity.As if he heard your thoughts, your phone began to ring. You didn’t think to pick up, only looked when you saw Yuuta’s hand move. His hand wrapped around it, squeezing the volume button until it buzzed on silent, flipping it over. His arms wrapped around you and pulled you down to lay against his chest again, practically growling as he pressed your face to his throat and fucked so deep into you you could feel him battering your cervix. The sound that broke from your lips as you creamed around his cock was something you hadn’t heard before, breathy and wild.

“That’s right baby, cum on my cock as much as you want” He panted, his hands running soothingly up your back despite him still hammering into your sensitive pussy, “I’m your husband now, I’ll make him disappear and you'll be all mine won't you?”.

#yuuta okkotsu smut #yuuta okkotsu x reader #yuuta okkotsu #jjk smut #slimeball collab 💚#em writes ✍#em talks 👄

817 notes · View notes

arsnof · 6 months ago

Text

ArsCo Presents the Inaugural Arsnof's Great American Yard Sard Comics and Sundry Sale 2024!

Hello there! I'm Arsnof. You may remember me from content such as "Canadian Illustrator", "Dungeon Mentat", or even "Transformers Meme". I'm here today to host a celebration of buying things, thinking they're so super cool, and then putting them away and never looking at them again. Comics, books, toys, anime, manga, CCGs, rare webcomic goodies, tiny figurines of yokai, a Little Golden Book adaptation of Gremlins that ends before midnight, Chuck Norris's Karate Kommandos, can you read Japanese because I can't, official Soul Coughing stickers, a hoard of well read Wizards and Toyfares, Funko Pops, feet pics (you can get off, but only if you can correctly diagnose what's wrong first), Transformers...

I could go on forever, but I got it, you want it, we can make a deal (no tongue).

Why is this happening? I'm shit broke and getting shitter. Going down like a Trump Casino. Guy paying his bills on time? I haven't heard that name in forever.

I've been taking care of my ailing father (tried to die on us three times so far this year) and the rest of my family (I don't owe you an explanation, cop) and then someone just up and decided to make my automobile a notomobile.

They didn't have insurance, but that's okay because we have full cov-*hand to ear*-what? We don't? Only comprehensive? Since when? FUCKING shit... Okay, but we still have uninsured motorist, so-four thousand? Four thousand. Dollars. $4,000. To replace an entire ass truck.

We are in desperate need of a car. I've got a lifetime of memories. You, on average, have some change sitting around. Can I have some? I'll trade you stuff.

I'm starting with my comics because they're easiest to catalogue. See something you like? HMU, as the kids say (please God don't let that be a sex thing) and I'll see what I can do. I'm giving the comic shop at which I used to work a vague preference, but I can be swayed.

Next up will be the trades and manga, DVDs of varied origin, toys, and so on.

Criminitly.

If life can stop kicking us in the gender neutral pain zone for five fucking minutes, @paulyollyoxxenfree and I will get back to handicrafts. They're getting back into the amiguroove and I'm going to hit the pad - finish and print Kitty, start Dr. Doctor. Stickers and stuff. I'm not shaving for a while to put me in mall Santa shape by Thanksgiving.

But what if you've got too much money and you're sick of it, but you hate being given things? I take donations. If you put a special request in the memo, I won't even give you the thanks. I'll just spit. I take requests.

Papal

Cache

Fuck, I don't know, antelope? My email - [email protected]

I might make one of those kofi things.

Oh and, heheh, one more thing...

Launching in the fourth quarter 2024, ArsCo is proud to announce Alone With Arsnof, the happening new app that gives you the power to have some one-on-one time *gunshot* wit- *sudden fade to red-tinted black, gunshot echo. Sirens fade in. HE'S DOWN! OVER THERE! THE ROOF? A high-pitched whine. Bright light. The late afternoon sky comes into focus. Fireballs? The sun is so bright. Automatic gunfire. No, jets. Falling. Screams. Recognizable screams. Unrecognizable screams? Inhuman? The sun blinks*

219 notes · View notes

spearsillustration · 25 days ago

Text

🏛️ Senator Shockwave X Cybertronian Female Assistant Reader (Part 1/3)

Notes: Why did I ever have to learn that Shockwave had a super tragic backstory? When I was younger he was my least favorite Decepticon since I just thought he was pure evil. Practically crying after seeing what happened to him in the comics. And his line "Remember me as I was-." Was an even harder blow. 😭

This will probably end up being super long. I had half of this planned and the other kind of thrown in randomly so not my best work but I'm proud of it nonetheless.

- I fear this might be a boring read, So I'd love some feedback after you finish reading this. -

Part 2/3 -

Word count - 5,424

Page number - 15.2

I was rushing to get to the senate building where I had a meeting this morning. I went to the front desk asking where I could find Shockwave. The person at the front desk gave me extremely vague directions. I just hoped I could find his office.

Luckily for me, I found an office that looked at least a bit useful I could probably ask for better directions. I lightly knocked on the door to politely get their attention.

He seemed lost in thought before looking up at the door where I stood.

"Oh, welcome to the senate. How can I help you?"

"I'm sorry to bother you, I was scheduled for an interview with Shockwave for the assistant position and seed to have gotten myself lost," I said shyly from the door. I was definitely lost.

"I'm probably in the wrong place."

He looks up from his desk. "Ah, yes. That was today. You're in the right place."

He stood up, moving around the desk to greet me at the door. "Please, do come in. Take a seat."

I tried my best to shake off my nerves and smiled. "Of course thank you."

He gestured to the seat across his desk.

"Please, make yourself comfortable." He returns to his seat. "May I have your name first and foremost?

"(Y/N) sir. It's nice to finally meet you in person."

"(Y/N), hm? Well, it's a pleasure to make your acquaintance. And you said you were here for the assistant position?"

"Correct." I kept my hand neatly folded in my lap so I wouldn't nervously fidget.

"Right."He leaned back in his chair, seemingly studying me before nodding.

"Now, just so you are aware, as my assistant, you would essentially be my second pair of hands. You would need to be there at my beck and call for anything I may need." He explained. "You will also need to keep track of my calendar and make sure it's up-to-date and correct at all times. Can you do that?"

"Yes sir."

"Very good. I should also mention, that if you *do* get this position, it will be long hours. Long hours and more than a few late nights. Do you think you can handle that?"

"Nothing I can't handle, I'm a night owl myself so some late hours aren't a problem for me."

He seems pleased enough. "Excellent, as a follow-up question, are you at all familiar with my work or... philosophy?"

"Of course, I've read some of your historical studies and other works related to your late mentor. I always found it quite interesting."

"As you should!" He leaned forward on his desk, a slight smile on his face as he spoke, clearly pleased by my answer. "I find a surprising amount of people in this city don't see the true potential of the technology we develop. Not to mention our society itself. But I can sense you're a bit more aware than the average individual."

"I graduated from the same academy you went to. I've seen some of your work firsthand. It was one of my old professors who told me you were looking for an assistant so I quickly applied to work with you."

He chuckled heartily at this news. "Ah, is that so? Hah, they're still teaching my work? I'd almost be flattered if that old building hadn't fallen apart even more since my time there. But, I digress, it's an interesting coincidence, of our... similar histories. Although I can't say most of my old professors had anything positive to say about me, to my face or not."

"Yeah he can be quite stern but he seems proud of your accomplishments. He almost made my spark give out when he sent me a message telling me about you. Not very often he reaches out."

He laughed again. "That old coot? Hah! You know, I don't think he's changed a bolt since I first met him. Always so "passionate" about progress, about expanding our minds and inventing new technology and whatnot."

He leaned back against his chair again, taking a moment to size you up as a person.

"And he has a soft spot for you, does he?"

"Apparently and completely unexpected. I graduated five years ago and this is the first time I remember speaking to him besides running into him a few times. I always thought he hated me or at least my class." I laughed at the thought.

He chuckled as well, shaking his head. "Oh, he most "definitely" thought of your class as a bunch of dunder-headed fools and idiots. I couldn’t count on my servo how many classes of his I had to sit through as he bemoaned the incompetence of his students. But something about you… must've caught his optics."

"I suppose, but you as well it seems. He talked pretty highly of you. But he also said at least one of his students had to do something with their lives."

"Did he, now? Hah! I can hear it now…Well, at least at least ONE of my students will accomplish something*.”

He imitated the professor, lowering his voice and making it harsher and gruff to replicate him. I couldn't help but laugh at his silly impression. Causing his smile to grow wider as he continues the imitation, laughing himself.

“Shockwave! Yes, I remember him… He was the ONE I had hopes for. He had a good brain! But now he’s a politician, so I can see it’s all gone to his head!" He continued.

"Sounds about right. If I closed my eyes I'd think I was back in the academy."

He chuckled, resting his arms back on his desk and watching me intently. It seemed he enjoyed my presence.

"He certainly did have a way with words, I'll give him that. As I said, very passionate. Very *very* passionate. Okay back on topic. So tell me, miss (Y/N), why do you want this job?"

"I'm honestly interested in working with you. Your research is top notch and you're a politician I fully support."

His smile widened. "Ah, a flattery, as well as a loyalist. You're a sharp one. And a quick learner, I imagine." He leaned back in his seat a bit. "Now, tell me this; if you don’t mind, what interests you about my work the most? I’m curious."

"Your outlook on the future Is quite interesting and you seem to be one of the only researchers interested in our resources. You are aware that as our population grows we need more energon mainly. Too many people try to simply think in the present which won't help us in the long run." I accidentally ranted on.

He nodded, pleased with my answer. "So you understood what he was trying to accomplish...Precisely. People in this city, especially those I work with up in the Senate, are more concerned with now, or themselves more than Cybertron as a whole. In this day and age, a city of this size requires a very specific amount of energon for it to thrive. And we’ve nearly used up our planet’s natural resources." He laced his fingers together. "Something must be done to maintain that balance."

"And I know your research is to find a solution. I'd love to assist you in that endeavor."

He smiled at this. "It’s been a while since someone was so enthusiastic, or willing, to assist in his cause, let alone someone with a similar mindset to my own. I like you. You’ve got ambition, you’re quick, and you seem to be capable of thinking for yourself. It’s very refreshing, I’ll say that much."

"Thank you, sir."

"Oh please, sir makes me feel old. Just call me Shockwave. I have a question for you if you don’t mind."

"Oh of course Shockwave."

"Now, I have to ask. You’re not interested in getting into politics, are you?" He chuckled softly. "You’d either be a terrifying political opponent or an excellent addition, given what I’ve seen."

"Oh me, I couldn't do politics. I'm a horrible public speaker. I stumble my words and get super anxious." I answered a bit too honestly.

"A shy one? I never would’ve guessed." He seemed almost genuinely surprised. "You carry yourself well. You look like a confident person, you certainly sound it, although a bit reserved."

"I do the best I can in professional settings."

"Fair enough." He seemed to think for a moment, studying me, then smiled again. "Tell you what. How about I give you a week-long trial? See how you can handle yourself working alongside me, get a true taste of the position, hmm?"

"That sounds perfect to me."

He smiled, nodding in agreement, and stood up. "Excellent, be here at 9 am, next Monday, sharp. No being late, first impression, and all that. I’ll clear out some space at my desk for you, you’ll be working there for the majority of the time. I’m expecting good things from you, (Y/N)."

"Thank you so much, you won't regret your decision." I shake his hand with a smile.

"So I shouldn’t, (Y/N)" He grips my hand firmly in a handshake, his expression stern yet pleased, before it softens again as he releases you. You best be on your way now, you know the way out. Until next Monday, it’s been a pleasure, I’m looking forward to working with you."

"Me as well. See you Monday." I stood up and gave him a curt nod with a smile before leaving.

I was so giddy with excitement the second the door closed behind me I had to take a deep breath to calm myself.

Can't wait to start.

---

[Time skip to Monday]

I made sure to leave early so I wouldn't be late. I arrived at his facility half an hour early so I walked the halls a bit anxiously waiting for the proper time to enter his office. I think five minutes early would suffice. When I stepped into his office, he looked up from his work, smiling at me.

"Ah, (Y/N) right on time. Good, you seem to be a punctual individual, good quality to have."

"I do the best I can Shockwave."

"That’s what I like to hear," He set down the datapad he was going over and got up from his chair, gesturing to the small, clearly recently made space on the other side of his desk. "Come, take a seat."

"Thank you." I walked over to my new nicely organized work space.

He stepped out of the way as you slid into the seat, standing next to you as he gestured to your area. "Ah, I had one of the staff set that up for you last Friday. I trust it’s to your liking. If not, feel free to request a change whenever you feel necessary."

"No It'll work perfectly for me."

He nodded, satisfied with my response, then pointed at the datapad he had put down earlier. "Speaking of which, your primary function here will be to assist me. You’ll be taking care of my calendar, and you’ll also be a sort of…second pair of hands. Whatever I may need you to do around the office, I expect you to do it well, with minimal error, and promptly. Is that understood?

"Completely."

He smiled, pleased, and sat back down in his chair. "Excellent, and remember, my work here is private, what you see or hear in this office stays in this office, understood?"

"Of course, I figured as much with your position."

His smile grew. "You learn quickly, good. That’s a very necessary quality to have, around here."

He put a fresh datapad in front of me. "Now, first thing’s first. Open that, and familiarize yourself with my schedule for the day."

"Understood," I said reading through the list. "Seems like an easy workload for today. Some paperwork to sort through, and meeting with one of your fellow senators later this evening. Which in the end would probably include more paperwork to fill out."

Shockwave nodded, watching intently as I quickly read through his schedule. "Very good, correct on both counts. Very observant, I must say. Tell me, you read fast, don’t you?"

"Yes sir, always have. I quite enjoy it as well."

He smiled again, resting his chin against his fist as he studied me from behind his desk, amused by how enthusiastic I was. Eager to learn, eager to work. Exactly the kind of person he had been looking for I hoped.

"Reading is a hobby of yours, then?"

"Yep," I answered while looking at the data pad.

He chuckled and leaned back in his Chair, "Any other hobbies you might have? You know I’m going to do a background check on you, I might as well have the whole list."

"Reading, writing, and art are the main things I enjoy."

He raised an eyebrow, intrigued by that. "Reading, writing, and art, hm…? You’re a creative type, then?"

"Yes, and it comes in quite handy for work."

He smiled again, leaning his chin against his palm. "Oh, I imagine it does. And these aren’t just things you do during your leisure time? You put them to good use, as well? I’m almost jealous, I have a one-track mind, it’s all about politics and work."

"Well, we all work differently." Though it was a bit disheartening to hear. He must overwork himself.

He chuckled bitterly like I read his mind, confirming my thoughts.

"Indeed we all do. But unfortunately, politics isn’t kind to individuals with many, diverse, interests. My mind tends to hyper-fixate on the present, on work, and my research. Sometimes I wish it weren’t that way…" He paused, thinking for a moment.

"Say, what time was my meeting later?" He changed the subject so quickly that it almost made my head spin.

"Oh um, five this evening." I quickly answered looking back down at the datapad.

"Tch, 5?" He looked at the time, a bit bothered that the meeting was later than he thought. "That’s right, why am I only just now remembering this…?"

He mumbled, clearly annoyed with his forgetfulness. Then, turning back to me, he looked contemplative for a moment and then got to his feet. "You’re joining me for the meeting."

"To take notes I assume?" I was a bit nervous joining a meeting room full of senators.

"Of course, that’s one of the main purposes of your being here, I’ll need you to take notes." He said with a nod, walking over to stand next to my chair, and leaning on my desk. It seemed he noticed my nervous expression and smiled. "But you don’t need to look so frightened, you won’t be the one in the hot seat."

Well, that eased my worry for the most part. "Shouldn't be anything I can't handle."

"Exactly."

He chuckled, folding his arms as he leaned over the desk. We both were so close now, and he seemed almost amused by how nervous I looked. "And even if something were to go wrong, I’ll be there. Don’t worry, I don’t throw my assistants to the wolves."

"W-well I appreciate that."

He quickly continued with his line of thought, still leaning up against my desk. "And if I may ask, why do you look so nervous? As far as I’m concerned, you’re not the one being scrutinized by the other senators, you’re here for my benefit. Is it the other senators that worry you?"

"A bit, I just don't know what to expect. I'm just a bit nervous and I'm new to the job. The longer I work with you the calmer I'll be."

"You’re very inexperienced, yes, I’ve noticed. That’s another one of your good qualities, you’re not afraid to admit that." He smiled, tilting his head, still leaning next to me. "The others won’t scrutinize or judge you, I promise. They may question me, and be somewhat skeptical of you, but I’ll handle them, you needn’t worry."

[Timeskip To Meeting]

Now I was walking beside Shockwave, the halls of the senate building bustling with activity around the two of us as we made our way to the meeting. It was evident Shockwave held an established presence in the halls, his gaze commanded respect and demanded attention.

Eventually, we arrived at the meeting in question, a large room with a long table taking up most of the space. A few other senators were already present, chatting amongst themselves at their seats. A few of them looked over to Shockwave as we both entered. I stayed behind Shockwave and silently followed him to his designated spot.

He took his seat, right at the center of the table, with me beside him. The others were still chatting, a casual atmosphere until Shockwave clears his throat, and they fall silent. He waits until everyone is in place before speaking. "Alright, let’s get down to business."

His booming voice was completely different from his usual tone. It silenced the room entirely as everyone else looked our way making me take a deep breath.

He smiles as everyone quiets down, some of them glancing in my direction before turning their attention back to him entirely. He takes a moment to glance around the table, observing everyone’s expressions, and their demeanors, before speaking again. "If I may have your attention, I have a new assistant that I wish to introduce." He motions to me, and I immediately feel multiple pairs of optics and attention on me.

My eyes widened a bit anxiously as I turned to him hoping he would do the introducing part. I'm worried my voice wouldn't hold nearly as much volume as his.

He chuckles softly, seemingly amused by my hesitation. He glances at me then back at the other senators, before addressing them all again. "This is (Y/N), she’ll be my assistant from now on, and a valuable asset to me."

I note the smile he gives me while he says this, and the senators begin murmuring and whispering amongst themselves. Shockwave doesn’t object to this, instead smiling wider, clearly waiting to hear what they have to say. You also notice some of them glancing your way occasionally.

I quickly whispered my thanks. I probably would have made a fool of myself and him if I spoke.

He glances over at me and nods, before turning his attention back to his fellow senators, his expression slightly more serious. They had now finished their whispering, and Shockwave spoke up again, his voice returning to a somewhat stoic and serious tone. "Now, enough distractions, I believe the topic at hand was funding for the Iacon Academy. Yes?"

As they went back and forth with their arguments I wrote down every word from the Senators, which I will say is quite difficult with all the useless bickering some decided to partake in.

It was clear some of the senators were more interested in arguing for the sake of arguing, rather than actually getting things done. Shockwave was getting noticeably more annoyed with each word spoken in the meeting. His fists occasionally clenched, and his jaw tensed, he was growing frustrated with it all. Even still, he was a master at keeping his composure, his expression stoic, never letting anyone see him annoyed. The fact that I had noticed, was a slight testament to my perceptiveness.

I looked up at him with a nervous smile easily noticing his annoyance and whispered to him. "I didn't realize how annoying your job must be at times."

He glanced at me when I spoke and sighed internally. He was trying his best to maintain a professional demeanor, but they were pushing it.

"The arguing, the bickering, is just one of many parts of the job I could go without." He whispered back, keeping eye contact with me, before returning his attention to the meeting.

"How do you ever get anything done around here?"

He chuckled a little at that. A rare moment of lighthearted humor in the tense atmosphere of the meeting. "A fair and understandable question to ask in this situation."

He sighs, as the arguing only raises in volume, before tapping the table, and commanding all attention on him.

With a stern expression and a commanding tone, he speaks. "That is enough!"

His tone would have scared me out of my seat if it had been directed at me. All eyes turn to him in unison. Shockwave stares straight ahead with an intense, yet serious expression, waiting for one of them to argue or object. No one speaks up, and he takes this opportunity to speak again. "All this arguing among friends doesn't get us anywhere, does it? We’re all here with the same goal, to aid the best interest of Cybertron. We may have our own beliefs and personal goals, but our purpose here is to keep things running smoothly for the greater good of all."

I wasn't always completely certain of his goals as a politician but his voice rang out with a truly hopeful and optimistic outlook for Cybertron. I was proud to be working beside him. He glanced in my direction again, for a moment, a silent gesture of reassurance. He wasn’t done speaking yet. But he was pleased to see he had made an impression. His expression and tone soon turned serious again, and he began speaking once more. "We’re all on the same side here. Let’s put this childish squabbling aside for a moment, and start getting work done."

I looked around the table to see all the senators had a slight look of shame. Shockwave smiles, pleased to see them all quiet and a bit humiliated by his actions, and continues speaking, as he pulls up a holographic map for them all to see. "Alright, let’s get back to business." He says as he moves on to the subject of the Iacon Academy.

It had seen better days since I last saw it. A heartbreaking sight to see such a wonderful facility going to shambles. He brings up some numbers, charts, and other data related to the academy. All concerning funds, or lack thereof.

"This academy has stood as a beacon of learning and knowledge for generations of individuals in this city, but funding is running dry. More and more of its resources are dedicated towards its deteriorating state rather than actual education, and it's getting worse by the day."

It was truly a shame to see. I just hoped they could all agree on a solution.

A small discussion ensues between the others, some agreeing some arguing, and some simply keeping to themselves. It goes on for a short amount of time until one of them speaks up.

"I say we cut funds entirely from the Iacon Academy, and dedicate those funds to something more useful." Came from one of the quiet senators on the far end of the table.

I accidentally gasped at the suggestion louder than I'd like. So I quickly covered my mouth and looked down at my notes hoping I didn't get scolded for my disruption.

Shockwave raised an eyebrow at this unexpected outburst and glanced over at me. Then, glaring at the one who suggested cutting all funds, he says, pointedly and sternly, "The Iacon Academy needs funding, we cannot just cut funding entirely. It's a core part of our city, and we can't simply just let it fall apart."

Shockwave took the words right out of my mouth. Shockwave glared at the one that suggested the foolish idea. The others all began to speak up and add their own opinions, some more heated than others. It was clear it'd become a bit of an argument again, one quite different than the bickering during the start of the meeting. It was now a tense discussion of different opinions, with everyone throwing ideas into the mix. Again, Shockwave's fists clench, and his jaw goes tense again. He seems frustrated but keeps himself from reacting, for now.

He called for the meeting to close for now so everyone could think through their decisions and come back with clear plans rather than arguing with one another.

And just like that, the meeting was over. Most of the other senators seemed disgruntled and mildly irritated with Shockwave's decision to close the meeting in the middle of a discussion, but they didn't object.

He knew they'd come back later with even more to say, and even more to argue about, but it would hopefully be less heated than this meeting, and actually accomplish what it was meant to. After the others began to leave, Shockwave sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, tired from everything that had just taken place.

"Are you alright Shockwave?" I asked kindly while making sure all my notes were together and organized properly. I know he'd like to read over them later.

He looked over at me, surprised, and sighed. "Just tired. Frustrated with all their arguing and bickering, it happens every single time. I don't know why they bother to show up if all they do is go back and forth about things."

"Well, that's how it always seems to be when people with positions of power get in a room together. But you seem different. You don't act like most politicians."

He raises an eyebrow again, amused by this comment. "Oh really? And how is it you expect politicians to act, exactly?"

"Well like most of the people arguing during the meeting. Argumentative, rude, judgemental, and completely self-centered."

He rolls his eyes at this, nodding in agreement. "Unfortunately, that's just what it's like working with most fellow politicians, I could spend hours listing everything I find annoying about the way most of them act."

"Then why do you do it, why deal with them? There are plenty of other things you could do to help people. And less dangerous. You're always in danger while in your position and no one can get along."

He crossed his arms, a serious but calm expression on his face. "Because if no one like me does it, then everything will go to waste, and nothing will change for the better. Someone needs to maintain balance and make sure things run smoothly. I am quite aware of the dangers that come with the job, but I am willing to take the risk to make sure Cybertron continues to thrive."

I could almost sigh. "You're too good for this job. I mutter to myself. An old friend of mine also told me about you before I got this job, you know him pretty well. Orion Pax, the name should sound familiar. I might have liked a bit about why I signed up for this job."

His eyes widened and he raised an eyebrow again. "Orion? Of course, I've known him for longer than I can remember. What does he have to do with this?"

"He's the main reason I applied for this job. He's worried about your safety. We all know you've had multiple death threats in your time working here. We'd all hate to see you get hurt."

He raises an eyebrow at the death threats part. "Of course, he is."

He sighs. "I appreciate his concern, but I'm not in danger. I know how to handle myself, and I'm perfectly aware of all the risks that come with the job. I knew what I was getting into when I decided to join the Senate, and I won't let a handful of death threats from scared politicians stop me."

"Well Orion wants to make sure you're safe so..he might have asked me to try and work with you. Everything I said in our interview was true but I'm not just a simple assistant. I worked with Orion before on more important and dangerous operations."

"You…Worked with Orion on something dangerous?" He tilts his head, looking at you with a curious yet somewhat uneasy expression. "Tell me truthfully, did Orion know you were going to mention this to me?"

"No he wanted me to stay quiet, but I hated the idea of lying to you. I wanted you to know the truth, but my main reason for being here is to help you and make sure you're safe for Orion's sake."

He crosses his arms, and his expression turns into a serious yet slightly displeased look. "Orion knows that I don't want to be protected or treated differently because of his concerns. And he should have told me this ahead of time. I understand his concern, but I didn't ask for him to send someone to watch over me."

I looked down in defeat. "If you want me to leave I'd understand."

He shakes his head and sighs. He's angry with Orion, and his expression makes that clear. "No, I don't want you to leave. I want you to do exactly what you were hired for. It's Orion who I have some… choice words for."

"He only means well. He views you as a good friend. But times like these are unsafe for good bots like you. Well us I suppose."

"I'm aware, he's mentioned that fact countless times before and I always tell him the same thing. There are others more valuable than me, and I can handle myself if there really is danger. And I know he means well. The concern comes from a good place and I appreciate the sentiment, truly. But sending someone to protect me, without ever asking me about it is just… a bit insulting."

"That's why I wanted to tell you. And the only reason Orion sent me is because he's heard word of someone planning something against you. We're not sure yet but it seems like you're in danger."

He raised an eyebrow, listening intently. "Heard of something? From who? Do you know anything concrete about these threats?"

"From what I know it's possible some of the other senators want to take you out. But that's all I know for sure. I wish I could tell you more."

He closes his eyes and puts a hand to his chin, in a thinking pose. "They want to take me out? That's certainly an interesting development… and probably not all that surprising, a good portion of the senators don't like me one bit." He sighs and turns back to me, his expression more serious now and his tone matching it. "So you're here to what? Look out for me?"

"In simple terms, yes."

He looks me up and down, considering the situation. He's still somewhat unhappy about this arrangement, but he's not exactly opposed to it either. "I don't need anyone's protection, no matter what Orion says. But I respect the honesty you've shown...Alright, I accept your presence. But don't expect me to be any more careful than usual."

"I accept those terms. I'll still only function as your assistant unless you're in danger. My goal isn't to be an overgrown babysitter. I'm only here when needed."

He nods, and his expression softens again. "That's all I ask. As long as you still function as my assistant. I'm still not happy with Orion, I'll need to speak with him later."

#transformers #senator shockwave #Shockwave #x reader #transformers x reader #Senator Shockwave x reader

65 notes · View notes

boy-comics · 2 months ago

Note

please write the fluffiest scenarios you can about first kisses with xdh :( i just think it would be so cute and sweet. thank you!

XDINARY HEROES AND FIRST KISSES

── .✦ tags; swearing, some impromptu kisses (all reciprocated)

── .✦ a/n; anon you don't know how much first kisses have me shaking the bars of my cage. i tried to make these very fluffy but some feelings fell in by accident for some. oops. i hope you like them anyway :')

── .✦ gunil;

gunil is a gentleman when it comes to milestones in your relationship. from the first confession, to holding hands, to meeting your family, he has always made sure you were comfortable, meeting your eyes with a questioning raise of his eyebrows before eagerly taking the plunge and exposing how much he had hoped you would say yes.

it's one of the reasons you adore him. however, in the back of your mind, you think you wouldn't mind if things like that just—happened.

that theory is put to the test soon enough.

after the band's latest concert, you wait for him at the agreed location in the back. the aftershocks of their performance still buzz through you; hands down, it had been their best one yet, and you know that gunil is absolutely thrilled.

when he rounds the corner, you prepare to congratulate him, you worked so hard, i'm so proud of you. you don't get to.

because as soon as he rounds the corner and spots you, his pace speeds up, and before you can get a single word out he's engulfing you in a sweaty hug, then cupping your face between his hands and kissing you hard.

pleasant surprise and something warm like melted butter ripples down your spine to the tips of your toes as he tilts his head. oh.

it's only a matter of time before he jerks back in sudden realization. out of breath and eyes comically wide, your usual dorky gunil is back, apologizing profusely for kissing you without warning. he stares at your lips the entire time.

you pull him back in for more.

(you blame it on the post-concert adrenaline. or thank it, really.)

── .✦ jungsu;

with jungsu, physical affection is never in short supply. step into the same room as him when it's just the two of you and he's wandering over in seconds, lacing your fingers together, hugging you from behind, resting his forehead on your shoulder. touch is a natural thing for you and him, more need than want, and as instinctual as breathing.

so perhaps it shouldn't come as a surprise when your first kiss slips by without fanfare.

it's an early morning for both of you, so you decide to pick up some coffee and head over to wish him luck before clocking in yourself. he still looks a bit groggy when you spot him; meeting you at the door, he wraps you in a hug and sways you back and forth a bit before taking his coffee with a sweet and raspy thank you, honey.

he tries a bit of yours and you try a bit of his, and he laughs when you admit that you had already taken a small sip on the way. then you check the time and realize that you really should get going, pecking him on the lips before standing up and hurrying out to clock in.

you don't register the significance of what you've done until you're sitting at your desk and drafting an email.

he's already cracking up over the phone when you call him after work, nearly hysterical, swearing up and down that you weren't thinking at all and that you were far more romantic than that. he quickly soothes you and insists that it's alright, that it was very cute, and shyly confesses that he hopes you'll be able to do that every morning one day.

i want to kiss your face all over now, though ... ah, is that weird of me to say?

── .✦ gaon;

you're not together. you're not even together, but he looks so beautifully radiant that you stare until you ache inside.

in his room, immersed in an impromptu concert of your own making, jiseok jumps around like a fool with his guitar. early 2000s american rock rumbles from the small speaker on his desk. you are a fool as well, joining in stilted harmony with him with your sunglasses on and your phone abandoned on the corner of his unmade bed. the sunglasses are a pretense. you're afraid that if you take them off, he will notice the way you look at him.

the song ends and he glances up at you when he makes a dramatic pose, panting for breath. his lips break into a wide grin when you collapse in shrieks of laughter.

you love his smile.

and when he puts his guitar down and splays out next to you on the cluttered floor, you think for the sixth or seventh time that you love him, and you are terrified of telling him and even more so of hiding it forever.

and—

he is looking at you too.

the laughter fades; the breaths don't. you don't know how it happens. but something pulls the two of you to each other, and then he is taking off your sunglasses and pressing his pretty mouth to yours, hand cradling the back of your neck with so much care your eyes sting.

sorry, he mutters against your mouth, flushed and content. you were smiling and i couldn't stop thinking about it.

you cry. he holds you for the rest of the afternoon.

── .✦ o.de;

he and your older brother have been best friends since they were kids. however, it has been a little while since you've last seen him in person, so you are given the surprise of your life when you learn he's tagging along on a trip to your family's lakeside cabin, eyes sweet and laughter bright and physique absolutely, positively devastating.

you have liked him for forever, you think. but you are older now, and more realistic about how he must view you, so you keep your interactions polite and everything light.

and everything is fine until you find seungmin outside, unintentionally, after everyone else has gone to bed. he is sitting alone on the edge of the dock with his feet in the water, the exact picture of what you'd planned to do when you snuck out, so when he twists around and meets your eyes, you apologize and turn to leave.

he asks you to join him.

as you sit next to him on that dock, sandals at your side and feet splashing around idly, the wall you had tried to build crumbles into dust. he is still as kind as you remember. and when he says that he had missed seeing you, and asks why it seems like you've been avoiding him, you stupidly confess that you didn't want to embarrass yourself in front of the guy you had a crush on in high school.

he is silent for a bit. you are about to jump into the lake and swim to china when he finally replies, tone unreadable, ah, so you don't have a crush on me anymore, then?

the sounds that tumble out of your mouth seem to provide all the information he needs. you think that he will laugh you all the way back to the cabin, but he just smiles, touching your hand.

i'm just asking because i've liked you for a while too.

then he's requesting to kiss you, and somehow, you manage to say yes. his fingers trace your jaw as he tilts his head and greets your lips with his own—and you wonder, hazily, why you had bothered worrying at all.

── .✦ junhan;

it's an accident.

the relationship is fairly new, and the two of you are still getting used to the concept of being with each other in this way, going on dates and trying out the whole romantic thing after years of orbiting one another. it's honeyed and awkward and cherished, this growing stage of love, and you keep every careful step near and dear to your heart.

the day is cool and slightly cloudy. you and hyeongjun are enjoying it inside, sitting together on the couch and quietly enjoying hot drinks after the chilly walk you had embarked on earlier. you catch his eye as he takes a sip of his own drink, and his lips form a shy smile against the edge of the cup before he faces forward again.

you really just want to kiss his cheek. it's a small sign of affection that both of you have expressed enjoying, and you're both in a particularly cozy mood, and he's right here, pressed gently against your side and looking so pleased your poor heart can't stand it.

you shift in place and lean in. and everything would've gone to plan, had he not felt your sudden movement and turned his head—

his lips brush yours, soft and warm. his breath is warm, too, from the tea. your mind blanks.

then the two of you are breaking apart and you're apologizing and he's apologizing, faces as hot as the sun, and you are so embarrassed you curl up on the couch and will yourself to disappear. your first kiss, a complete accident. oh, god.

your mug is carefully removed from your hands. when you finally muster the courage to look at him again, he smiles a bit, cheeks and ears still flushed pink.

it's okay, really. next time, maybe we'll be more prepared?

── .✦ jooyeon;

for all his flirting and teasing and general extrovertedness, you've found that jooyeon is unexpectedly shy when it comes to your first kiss.

he asks for it jokingly at the end of a date, while you're standing on the threshold of your front door. it's the first time he's done so—not that there haven't been moments in the past where you're sure he had planned to kiss you, only to grow skittish at the last minute and smooch your cheek instead. perhaps you would’ve let that happen again if it weren't for the fact that he's been stealing glances the entire night, to the point where you're not sure he remembers the plot of the movie you've just returned from.

so with a cheeky grin, you step forward, put your arms around his neck, and tilt your head. the speed at which his expression changes when you do this is comical—his eyes widen like saucers, his eyebrows shoot up, and the strangest, cutest little giggle escapes his throat.

you can't help but laugh. his face turns a bit red, and then you're both giggling like middle schoolers as his hands move to your waist.

wait, seriously? i can?

we like each other, don't we? so kiss me. on the lips.

holy shit. uh, okay.

he clears his throat, and then he leans in closer, and you can feel his breath shaking against your lips. there's a moment where you think he's suppressing another nervous giggle before he presses his smiling mouth to yours in what is possibly the sweetest kiss you've ever gotten.

you kiss back. it's brief. too brief. he pulls away for a split second to gauge your reaction, and then you're both giggling again, and he's pressing his face into your neck, shoulders shaking.

you ask him if he's crying and he vehemently denies it before going quiet. his arms wrap around you, and you feel the vibration of his next question reach down to your heart.

so … second goodnight kiss?

#xdh imagines #xdinary heroes x reader #xdh #xdinary heroes #gunil x reader #jungsu x reader #gaon x reader #o.de x reader #junhan x reader #jooyeon x reader #xh #beecee's writing #beecee's requests #anon #hey can you guess which member is bias wrecking me so hard right now. waughghh #xh scenarios

92 notes · View notes

asklilmissrarity · 11 months ago

Text

The Future of Lil Miss Rarity

Hello everyone, this is Jay Tonique (formerly known as Lil Miss Jay), the writer, artist, everything other than the music in the Lil Miss Rarity animation for the blog "Lil Miss Rarity."

As some of you know, Lil Miss Rarity was an ongoing outlet for my physical, verbal and emotional abuse I was suffering prior to and leading up to Lil Miss Rarity's release, October 11th 2011.

The blog took off so heavily that my entire artistic career became a viable future for me, allowing me to profit from my art, build a huge loving fanbase, and even allowing me to become something of a celebrity in the Brony community (even very much hated by a large portion of the community).

It's needless for me to say that Lil Miss Rarity not only changed but saved my life. I was on the verge of taking my own life around the time the blog was started, due to the abuse I was going through, and if it weren't for the success of the blog that fateful October week, I would certainly not be here, typing this right now. I owe my life to you all, and the support you've given me for this blog.

However, it's time for the news I know very few people want to hear. In fact, I'm sure just reading this line right here has people's hearts sinking, but please, don't be anxious, please read the full post.

I would like to say: Please read the full post, I am going to be very clear about the future.

Moving forward, Lil Miss Rarity will no longer be updated, and the blog is officially entirely over, as of this post.

I am still looking for a musician to commission a new song for the remake of the Lil Miss Rarity animation on YouTube, which will be my final major update involving the blog, and then I will be putting the blog entirely to rest. The animation will serve as a fond emotional farewell to Lil Miss Rarity.

However, that's not the end of the twisted grimdark storytelling. I have decided to make a spiritual successor, a new IP, entirely my own and not using My Little Pony as a crutch.

I won't get too into it, but I left the Brony fandom long ago. It was both the greatest thing to ever happen in my life, and the absolute worst thing to ever happen in my life. I met great friends, but also met unbelievably horrible sick people, many of which I literally got FBI involvement to deal with and many of which are literally in prison now.

Due to this, and many many more reasons I'm leaving out, I cannot and will not continue to be a part of the fandom. This is just a few reasons, as well, that continuing to have Lil Miss Rarity exist as a My Little Pony blog just doesn't make any sense to me.

So what am I doing moving forward?

A brand new IP called "Melodi." It's about a magic school student who is part of a wealthy family who goes on a magical twisted adventure in a horrifying grimdark world.

It will have characters either very slightly or very heavily inspired by the characters of Lil Miss Rarity, with Melodi of course being inspired by Rarity.

It will also be an ongoing web comic, similar to LMR, and will encourage fan feedback just as much as LMR did, but will not be an Ask Blog like LMR.

I plan to release character concepts for the cast of Melodi soon.

Now, there's probably a lot of questions moving forward, so I'll try to answer them now, as well as in asks on this blog, though I'd prefer you send the asks about Melodi to my main blog at http://www.jayisbutts.com/ask

Here's some questions I think will be asked, and I'll answer them here:

"Will this blog be on Tumblr?" - Yes, and on Patreon. Each update will be on Patreon first. When an update comes out on Patreon, the previous update will go public at the same time on Tumblr.

"Don't you think the LMR fanbase you've garnered for 12 years are gonna be upset about this?" - I'm 100% certain they will be, yes. However, I hope that most people who hear this news are excited to see Melodi in the future. I'm very proud of what I've created with LMR, and happy about how many lives I've changed and how many people have told me how much they love LMR. People with the heart-brand tattoo, people with LMR tattoos, people who cosplay as LMR, LMR fanart still being made regularly to this date, real-life Opal dolls, fan-dubs of the comic, fan animations, Anime Music Videos, etc etc etc. I love each and every one of you and I hope that I can one day garner the same amount of love for Melodi as I received for LMR. Thank you all so much for your support.

"What if someone else wants to carry on the LMR blog or use the characters to make their own?" - Please, do. LMR is officially Public Domain as of this post, and I strongly encourage LMR fan-fiction, fan-blogs, etc. I would love if someone could do LMR better than I did. I will very happily use this blog going forward to showcase new LMR blogs and fan-content that I like, and I will very gladly be a guest artist from time to time on an update or two to those blogs. You all have my blessing to take LMR and do with her whatever you want.

"Are you still remaking the LMR animation?" - Yes, I'm still actively seeking a musician to make an official LMR theme that will play in the background of it. It will be a glorious farewell to LMR.

"Is the heart-brand still a thing in Melodi?" - Absolutely, yes. The one incredibly major staple being carried over to Melodi is the heart brand. That symbol has become synonymous with LMR.

"What about the eye scars?" - Probably not. There will be facial scarring of some kind, yes, but considering the new story will not involve killing a cat (not yet anyway), she probably won't have the eye scars.

"Black eye with white pupil?" - We'll see! (It is a sign of Malice's corruption to have a black left eye, so almost certainly yes, but we'll see!)

"Ponies? Humans? Furries?" - I haven't fully decided. In my head, Melodi is a human, but I could also see her being a cat. I'm not sure what I wanna do just yet. However, she will not be a pony. She's gonna be far more human shaped. With boobies.

"Is this one gonna have porn?" - Nope! Not directly as part of the blog, no. Sexual encounters are going to happen in a very fade-to-black way, or a cropped-off-screen sort of way, yes. And there will be sexy characters, like monster girls or demon girls, and I'm sure people will find Melodi herself sexy, too. However, the blog is not going to contain actual porn. No full nudity. It will have what some would refer to as "fetish content," as with LMR, but it's not porn.

"Final question, so... LMR is just... dead? As of now?" - In terms of receiving updates from me, all that will be made is the LMR animation. But no, I certainly hope LMR is not dead. I would love to see the blog live on through other artists I've inspired. You all have my blessing to keep her alive forever.

Thank you all so much for your support.

More news involving Melodi and her twisted adventures coming soon.

I love you all, and I want you all to know how much your support of Lil Miss Rarity has changed my life.

I know it's cringe to type this, but, "I'm literally crying right now."

Mommy will always be pretty.

~Jay Tonique (Formerly Lil Miss Jay)

#lil miss rarity

352 notes · View notes

biteofcherry · 1 year ago

Note

Sentence Prompt: I'm so proud of you for using your safe-word.

AU: Ruby Gardens

I'm not in the BDSM world but stories where the Dom almost immediately praises their Sub for using the colors/safe-words really make me feel more inclined. I hope that makes sense.

More precious than rubies

Dom!Steve Rogers x plus size reader

warnings: none really; BDSM setting; Dom/sub dynamic; safe, sane and consensual; safewording; aftercare; communication;

Your heart was still pounding like crazy, even though Steve's hand provided that warmth of support as it rested on the small of your back.

You felt cold and shaky. And it had nothing to do with the fact you were naked. It was the wave of cold sweat that turned your skin clammy; anxiety filling your stomach with acidic dread.

"Is it okay if I hold you, or do you prefer me to step back?" Steve's calm, but worried tone reached you through the haze of chaos that was still messing with your brain.

You blinked a few times, trying to find his face in the blur of colors and focus on it.

Steve had a beautiful face. Chiseled like a perfect statue of Adonis. Nah, no Davids nor Adonises or other heroes could compare to how handsome you found him.

But mostly it was his eyes - so blue and so full of emotion - that held you captive.

"Hold me, please," you managed to croak out.

Steve didn't hesitate, instantly pulling you off the bench and lifting you up into his arms. Your dynamic has been developing for a few months now, but you were still stunned with how easily he could pick you up and carry you. As if you were light as a feather, though the scale showed something completely different.

"Sorry for all of that," you sighed once he settled you two down on a small chaise.

Steve adjusted you in his lap, so that you were more comfortable. He ran a finger along your cheek, before tucking it below your chin and tilting your head so your gaze met his eyes.

There was a slight frown marring his gorgeous face, but it wasn't annoyance. More likely worry.

"Never apologize for using your safeword," Steve said. "Whatever happened that made you do it, it was significant and heavy for you."

The scene wasn't hard. You doubted Steve even got you into half of what he planned on doing to you after you negotiated the general scenario for the evening.

Being under his care usually made you feel so safe and taken care of, that sometimes you considered revisiting some of your softer limits with Steve to see if maybe he'd like to explore some of them. Because with him you were willing to maybe poke at them and check them out.

But the blindfold, while not a limit, made you anxious.

At first you thought it's because it's a step of sensory deprivation and you had very little experience in that. Then your other senses started heightening, hearing most of all.

Instead of focusing on the sounds of Steve moving, or what implements he could be preparing to use, your attention went to the sounds a little further out.

To the laughter. Some other club members, who probably were just engaged in some conversation, or were watching a brat get disciplined. But your brain instantly screamed at you with horrified humiliation - that they were laughing at you.

At how you looked. How pathetic and ungraceful, and comically ugly you had to look there. Especially right next to Steve.

"I'm so proud of you for using your safeword," he assured you. "Not only because it let me know that you were in serious discomfort, which is something I as a Dom should look out for and react in time."

"But because it means you were taking care of yourself."

Steve's eyes softened as you stared at him a little confused. He changed his hold on you slightly, now running his fingers along your naked body in a warming caress.

"Upon feeling distressed, you didn't withdraw, didn't dissociate, you didn't grit your teeth to push through it. You safworded. You set a boundary and demanded it being recognized."

"You put yourself and your well-being first.

It stunned you. You didn't think of it the way he saw it, but now you started to understand why Steve said he was proud of you.

Not only in the BDSM aspect, but for your personal healing.

And Steve supported that more than anything else.

#anonymous #biteofcherry's birthday banquet #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x female reader #steve rogers x you #dom!steve rogers #more precious than rubies #ruby garden #ruby garden series

391 notes · View notes

elleloquently · 11 months ago

Text

the wretched and joyful [ 2 ] : ellie williams

ellie williams x female reader | eventual angst + slowburn

───⋆☆ But we don't have to talk about it, I can walk you home and practice method acting - I'll pretend being with you doesn't feel like drowning ♪

───⋆☆ I'm trying to be cool about it, Feelin' like an absolute fool about it Wishin' you were kind enough to be cruel about it - Tellin' myself I can always do without it, Knowin' that it probably isn't true ♪

| a/n - part two!! tags are at the bottom, let me know if u wanna be added! if you enjoyed reading, please considering reblogging/leaving a comment <3 thank you! | c/w - swearing, vague depictions of anxiety.. reader is in love with her best friend idk what to tell you!!

nearly everything that belonged to you used to belong to someone else. that's just the way things were.

you tried to find the thought comforting, but it really felt haunting.

when you moved into your house in jackson, it was like a still life museum. you couldn't help but try to imagine who lived there first, before the world went to shit. you tried to imagine what their daily life was like. how scared they must've been when...

it made you feel like you were living in a haunted house, and you were scared of ghosts.

maria was kind enough to set you up with some things that she thought you would like, but it still felt like you were living somewhere that you didn't belong.

the house felt like it was full of ghosts, so you rearranged and redecorated until it finally felt like your own.

years later, after a lot of trading and sorting through items ellie might find on patrol, you were actually pretty proud of the space that you presented for yourself. adeline once joked that you seemed to have a taste for "the frills," but you didn't mind.

you liked girly things, things that you could keep in secret and feel pretty without worrying about whether or not you seemed tough enough.

ellie had her comics, and you had your own things too.

your guilty pleasure was old magazines, filled with toxic drama, interior design tips, and how to's for all of your accessorizing needs. the pages were cheap and worn but good enough. the silly quizzes were the best part.

you liked pretending. pretending to live in that world instead of this one, wishing you could've been a girl picking out nail polish to match her outfits and deciding which color scheme suited her best. it flooded your senses with longing and never failed to give you a pit in your stomach.

it was like some kind of morbid obsession, wishing for better than what you had.

you didn't really talk about it, especially with ellie. you already knew how she felt about that sort of thing. besides, it made you feel weak. she just knew that you liked silly magazines, and would bring you them without a second thought if she had ever managed to find one.

jesse was actually the first to help you build your little collection. dina had found one on patrol, and brought it back so you could all laugh at the ridiculous headlines. when everything was winding down and you sheepishly asked if you could keep it, jesse seemed to take note.

besides ellie, jesse was one of your closest friends. he was a little more understanding to the sensitive side of you, which you appreciated. you hated feeling like you had to defend every little thought or feeling, to prove you weren't weak.

you'd been spending more time together as of late, especially since his patrol schedule was pretty much opposite of dina's.

you hated when they fought, always over something small and immature and it left you feeling like a child stuck in the middle. any group hangouts were typically reserved for when dina and jesse were on - so according to the news you had received from ellie, things were looking up.

when a knock at your door earned your attention, you jumped to answer it right away. you already knew who you were expecting.

"morning," you grinned as you held the door open. "are you coming in or am i coming out?" you wore shoes just in case, standing in the doorway.

"you're coming out," jesse replied, wearing a light jacket that he would most likely shed later. summer would be here soon, and the change in weather was certainly improving the mood of everyone in jackson.

you nodded once and tugged a sweater over your arms, closing the door behind you as you stepped outside. you loved mornings like this, warm and peaceful. it felt full of promise.

"where to?" you questioned, allowing jesse to take the lead. he grinned when he replied.

"the stables. hope you're not wearing your best clothes."

you scowled but only as a joke. you weren't wearing your "best" anything but even if you were, it wouldn't have mattered.

"you know i never mind," you chirped, bumping jesse's arm. "how come?"

"we're training more people for patrol so we might need more help in the stables for a bit. think you're willing to give an extra hand when you aren't wrangling the children?" jesse asked, raising an eyebrow as the corners of his lips turned upward.

there was somewhat of a school in jackson, and during the week you helped out with the younger kids. there weren't many, but enough so that they were glad to have your help.

"i would love to help," you said honestly, and jesse's smile turned sly.

"i know that," he replied. "that's why i already signed you up."

you snorted, rolling your eyes at his confident response. "whatever. i would've helped regardless, anytime."

"i know," jesse repeated. "thanks, kid."

this made you roll your eyes again, scoffing. there was barely even an age difference.

"you sound like joel." you wrinkled your nose, tilting your head. "all of you patrol people have such a complex," you grumbled, trying your very best not to smile.

"yeah, yeah." jesse slung an arm over your shoulders, causing you to gasp at the audacity. "you love us."

"us?" you questioned, falling into step with him.

jesse couldn't contain the shit-eating grin that plastered itself onto his face. "us. me, dina... ellie."

you laughed once, loud and embarrassed.

"you're so full of it," you replied, stepping out from under his arm.

"what? what did i say?"

"you're not funny. besides, i'm actually very upset with you," you confessed, staring down at your shoes while you walked.

your shift in tone was enough to concern jesse, and he almost seemed bewildered as he questioned you.

"what? why? what did i do?" he slowed his pace, waiting for you to respond.

you waited just a moment to linger it over his head before grabbing his arm, shaking it while you bounced on your feet like an excited child.

"for not telling me that you have a girlfriend!" you gushed, causing jesse to roll his eyes and quickly walk away from you.

"what's her name? what does she look like? is she gonna meet your family?" you continued on as jesse swatted at you. "you know i had to find out from ellie?"

"you're ridiculous," jesse grumbled.

"and you're keeping things from me?" you were really playing it up, finding satisfaction in the way he shook his head.

"you know, you're not funny," jesse mocked.

you laughed, catching back up with him. "really though, is everything all good?"

a small smile slipped in the place of jesse's scowl. "all good," he confirmed softly.

jesse seemed content so you let that be enough, finishing your walk to the stables in peaceful silence.

you didn't need much instruction since you were already quite familiar with the tasks. instead, it was mostly jesse explaining which horses would be in and out and when. you carried on with some light maintenance, chatting through each chore. jesse didn't really need to stay and help, but you appreciated the conversation.

"so," you started, placing a bucket of supplies on the ground. "what're we doing tonight?"

"huh?" jesse huffed, looking uncharacteristically caught off guard.

"the four of us," you clarified, brushing your palms on your pants. "i figured since things were cool again that we could finally hang out," you explained, though your use of finally might've been a bit overdramatic. jesse and dina were broken up for about a week, which meant a week of splitting your time between the two of them.

though lately you've been seeing less of dina, maybe because of her and ellie having plans or similar schedules.

"oh!" jesse exclaimed, the sudden loudness catching you off guard. "right. well, you know," jesse stammered.

you raised an eyebrow, waiting for him to put together a coherent sentence that wasn't just him shrugging his shoulders and shaking his head.

"you know," he repeated, even though you obviously didn't. "dina and i just thought that maybe... it would just be the two of us tonight. to um," jesse coughed. "catch up?"

you nodded silently, eyes wide with embarrassment. "of course!" you choked out, desperately wanting to save jesse from any more you know's and awkward stammering.

"hey, maybe tomorrow night," jesse offered, awkwardly clapping you on the shoulder. "you'll still hang with ellie, right?"

you nodded again, kicking your shoe against the ground.

you hoped that ellie would want to see you again, even though you just slept over. the matter wouldn't usually even be a factor, but you felt different lately. a little weird, like you were bothering her too much or something.

"for sure," you muttered, tossing a rag into the bucket with a clang.

jesse was quick to catch your change in tone.

"did something happen?" he questioned, leaning against a stable door.

his question felt like an assumption and you found yourself growing insecure as if everyone had noticed that something was different too.

you wanted to confide in him, you should've confided in him, about how ellie could be so hot and cold and was it normal to get stomach aches whenever you were around her?

instead, you forced out a short laugh and shook your head.

"'course not. she'll probably just sleep after she gets back."

jesse studied you briefly before kicking his weight off of the door, brushing his hands together.

"right. well, dina will probably be back soon so i should..."

"go on," you grinned, waving him away.

"you wanna come with?" jesse offered, knowing ellie would be returning as well.

"i actually think i'll stick around here. for... a little bit," you responded shyly, but jesse already knew why. "go on," you encouraged. "go!"

you watched as jesse walked away, casual at first but his stride turned into a sprint when he turned the corner, assuming he was out of view.

you laughed to yourself, standing awkwardly in the now empty stable. ellie would show up soon enough, which was good. you wanted a chance to talk to her. you were starting to feel pretty weird about how often you slept in her bed while she left for patrol in the morning.

you waited around a bit, standing awkwardly in the middle of the stables until you started to feel stupid and instead made yourself look busy. you rearranged some cleaning supplies in the buckets, and even wiped stall doors that you had already cleaned, just to look busy.

of course, ellie didn't appear until you were seemingly making small talk with a horse in the stable.

"-like it better when the weather is warm, right?"

ellie snorted, the sound cutting through the otherwise silent atmosphere that was only filled by your own chattering and the occasional horse sigh.

"who are you talking to?" ellie questioned, her tone lazy and amused.

ellie already knew, of course, but the startled look on your face was priceless.

"how was patrol?" you asked awkwardly. ellie led shimmer into the stables as you spoke.

"uneventful," ellie answered simply.

"that's good, right?" you asked, coming up to pet shimmer as she was being placed into her stall.

"uh, yeah, i guess," ellie shrugged, her tone sounding distant.

you deflated, just a little. maybe she needed some space.

"i'm gonna... get going," you announced, a little quieter than you intended but you had found your footing by the end of the sentence. finally, ellie turned and looked at you.

"what? you've been hanging around but now all of a sudden i'm here, and you're leaving?" ellie questioned, her eyebrows pinching together.

"just don't wanna be in the way," you replied, not knowing if you should take a step closer or a step further away.

"please," ellie huffed. you weren't sure if it was kind or insulting.

please like you're always in the way and don't seem to mind, or please like you're never in the way?

you opened your mouth, almost to ask for clarification, but the thought alone made your cheeks burn.

"i'm serious," you said instead, but didn't make any effort actually leave.

“of course you are,” ellie said, rolling her eyes. you caught the hint of a smile on her face though, just before she turned her back to you.

silent minutes ticked by while ellie was busy, and it was only awkward because you truly couldn't decide if you should just leave or stay. after the hesitation it seemed quite obvious that you would stay, but the dilemma made your face grow hot anyway. when did you start overthinking your interactions with ellie so much??

you really didn't want things with ellie to start being complicated, everything else was already complicated enough.

who was at fault, anyway? or was it simply nothing other than growing restless as the days grew longer?

your thoughts did a better job of occupying you than you had expected, because ellie blinked at you, unmoving.

"are you coming or what?" she asked, with that same unreadable tone that she seemed to love using lately.

you blinked. then nodded.

is this how things were going to be now? is this how they always were, you were only just now noticing?

you almost physically shook your head at the thought.

"coming where?" you asked instead.

ellie shrugged, something like a smile twitching at her lips.

you couldn't tell if she was trying to force a smile, or hide a real one and what the fuck, when did you start having so much trouble reading her?

"we could see joel," you suggested, trying to sound more upbeat than you had felt. you were in such a good mood yesterday, where did it go?

ellie raised her eyebrows at you.

"it's been a long time since we all had dinner together, just the three of us," you said nonchalantly, not wanting it to sound like a hint.

"yeah, well," ellie muttered, her gaze dropping to the ground. "a bit early for dinner, don't you think?"

"that's not really the point, but okay," you dismissed.

"what is the point then?" ellie asked, her voice suddenly more loud and pointed compared to just a few seconds ago.

the immediate switch in her demeanor caused your eyebrows to pinch together. "i thought you were.. doing better?"

the look on ellie's face was all of the confirmation that you had needed. it was the kind of expression that made you feel guilty for even bringing it up.

"sorry. i just thought.. you know, the boots," you practically stammered, not wanting ellie to be annoyed with you.

"'just being nice," ellie replied tightly, to which you nodded solemnly in return.

"forget it then. sorry. i shouldn't have mentioned it," you spoke, wiping your palms on your pants.

the fight, or, whatever it was that happened between ellie and joel was possibly the biggest and only secret that ellie had ever kept from you, to your knowledge. she was so frustratingly vague about it, skating around answers and reasons as to why joel didn't seem like her joel anymore.

they were friendlier now, more so than right after it had happened, but still it felt strained. it had practically happened overnight, much to the confusion of nearly everyone around the two, and things were still not back to the way in which they used to be.

you missed the dinners.

truthfully, you still had dinner with joel occasionally. you weren't sure if ellie knew, but you had never mentioned it to her.

considering, ellie wasn't the only one keeping secrets.

"forget it," ellie repeated quietly. for a moment, she looked kind of awkward, like she was trying to think of something else to say.

it actually sort of made you feel better.

the silence that followed lingered, but not too long, making it possible to recover from.

"let's just get out of here," ellie mumbled, so quietly that you nearly missed it. she began walking without even glancing back at you, surely assuming that you would just follow.

and you did.

you almost tripped over your own feet when you realized how seamlessly you would follow her without another word. it was dangerous, nearly.

"we could go to tipsy?" you suggested lightly, trying to catch up to ellie so it didn't seem as though you were trailing after her.

at your suggestion, ellie snorted.

"what, tough day or something? it's the afternoon," ellie denied, and you were simply grateful that the lighthearted teasing tone had returned to her voice.

"maybe another time. jesse and dina could come, we could make it a thing."

ellie raised an eyebrow, peering sideways at you as your lazy steps fell into sync.

"a thing," ellie repeated softly, shaking her head with a soft chuckle.

"is something wrong with that?" you questioned, squinting your eyes as the bright sun invaded your sightline.

"huh? no. just cute the way you always try to like... i don't know, make an event out of things," ellie explained.

your cheeks warmed, but the guise of the heat helped it to go unnoticed.

cute.

you didn't want ellie's words to linger, so you scrambled fast.

"hey, i still need to debut my new skirt, right?" you managed.

"that you do," ellie sighed. "or you could just- i don't know, hear me out.. just, put it on?"

you frowned at her teasing, even though it made your heart swell with affection. "that's boring, ellie. don't you know me at all?"

"best of all, actually," ellie retorted. you opened your mouth to fire back a reply, but nothing came.

ellie was right usually, always, when it came to you. she knew you better than anyone. in the world that you lived in, it was practically the best gift that you could give to someone that you cared for. vulnerability, loyalty. the ability to trust and be trusted. being known and feeling seen was like a reward.

sure, jackson was your home. but you weren't sure how much it truly would feel like home if ellie wasn't there.

it was funny, sometimes you had forgotten that you hadn't actually known ellie your whole life.

sometimes, you pathetically wondered what things might've been like if you had known ellie forever.

a few years ago, when ellie was prone to more laughter, she would tell fabricated stories about your friendship if you had met before. you would never forget the look on her face the first time that you had confided in her about the mistreatment from the QZ crowd.

"i would've fucked 'em up," ellie said solemnly, causing you to laugh in disbelief.

"what? ellie, i was... thirteen. you would've been too."

"yeah, and? i would've fucked them up. and then..-"

she would continue until you were in a fit of giggles, wheezing through laughter.

neither of you had much of a childhood, but ellie had some lucky moments. your time together though, it almost felt healing. despite everything.

"i know," you said finally, falling short of thinking up a witty response.

"you don't need to make any stops today, do you?" ellie questioned suddenly.

an evident look of confusion crossed your face as you answered. "hm? you mean addie? no, why?"

"just wondering," ellie grumbled, and your lips twisted into a teasing smile.

"why do you get so weird about her?" you questioned, closing your fingers around her wrist to keep her walking pace in tune with your own.

"i don't get weird," ellie disagreed, her tone bordering on childish. "i just feel like she's always judging me or something."

"judging you?" you laughed, the sudden loudness cutting through the hazy, quiet afternoon of jackson. "ellie, adeline does not judge you."

"she looks at me funny," ellie complained, wrinkling her nose.

"she does not!" you released your hold on ellie's wrist, limply wacking her arm instead. ellie only reacted by rolling her eyes.

"besides, if she looks at you funny, she probably has a reason for it," you contemplated with a click of your tongue.

"what? what did i do?" ellie questioned, her cheeks turning red.

you laughed again, loud, causing ellie to reach over and shove your side. you only momentarily stumbled, the clumsy reaction not halting your laughter.

"whatever. see you later," ellie grumbled, making no effort to walk ahead of you.

"okay, see you later," you chirped, settling your giggles but the aftermath still made your cheeks sting. ellie glanced at you quickly, and you could tell that she was wondering if you were actually going to leave.

your hand accidentally brushed against ellie's and you moved to put some distance between your bodies, ignoring the way that it sent jolts through your body.

"are you gonna stay again?" ellie asked, her tone sounding a little too forced to be nonchalant, but the attempt was there.

"at yours? sure. i feel like i haven't slept in my own bed in ages," you responded.

"you don't have to come," ellie said simply.

"no, it's not a bad thing," you clarified. really, it wasn't.

"i could come to yours?" ellie asked, a look crossing her face that you couldn't quite depict, almost like she had remembered something. maybe she didn't want to risk a run in with joel, as your dinner comment had unsettled her.

"only if you want," you shrugged.

"just let me grab some stuff first," ellie told you, to which you silently obliged with a nod of your head.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

"you're... okay, you're doing it wrong." ellie's snappy tone caused you to huff.

"i'm doing exactly what you said."

"no, you're not listening."

"you're not explaining!"

ellie rolled her eyes, moving to sit closer to you on the floor.

"your fingers are supposed to stay down, right here," ellie delicately pressed your fingers into place as you hold her guitar. you have to swallow hard, willing yourself not to react to her touch.

"one finger per fret, like this," ellie explains, her voice softer as she regained her patience.

"you know i'm never gonna be good at this," you complained, letting your fingers go limp under ellie's pressure.

"then why do you keep saying that you want to learn?" ellie questioned, sitting back and dropping her hands to her lap.

"because i want to be good at it," you sighed. you stretched your arms, handing the guitar to ellie. "it wouldn't be the same anyway. i just like when you play for me."

ellie's cheeks go crimson. "shut up."

she strummed anyway, showing you how the song that you were 'attempting' to learn was supposed to sound.

you leaned your back against the side of your bed, the wooden floor beneath you providing little comfort. ellie explained chords as the dreamlike sounds filled your bedroom. you listened intently, more focused on the sound of ellie's voice than the actual information that it was providing.

you spend a lot of nights like this, being the only two people in the world, the moon being your only light until you fall asleep.

your curtains, dingy and laced, were drawn back purposefully for that very reason, you had admired the late sunset as the moon finally began to peek its way into the night sky.

the moon, the sound of ellie's voice, the feeling of your surroundings seeming slightly fuzzy from how tired you were.. you wished you could bottle up these moments and keep them forever.

in these moments, when you watched her, your feelings seemed clear as day. ellie's eyebrows furrowed in concentration, the way her fingers seemed to strum effortlessly on the guitar, the little strands of hair that kept escaping her bun and falling into her face.

surely you loved her. there was simply no other way around it.

when it was dark, you could think it over and over.

i think i love her. i really think i might love her. it would make your pulse quicken and your insides explode, but the thought was fathomable. for some reason though, during the day, it couldn't even be a question. you would deny it. you wouldn't even allow the thought to slip into your mind as long as you could help it.

you really, truly weren't sure why it made such a big difference.

"i love it," you murmured, referring to the song that ellie was playing.

"i remember," ellie replied, feeling the need to whisper though she wasn't exactly sure why. "it's why i learned it, anyway."

ellie said it so simply, so casually, that you wouldn't have given it a second thought until you noticed the way that she refused to meet your gaze, even after she stopped playing.

"maybe i will be good at it one day," you hummed.

"maybe," ellie snorted. "if you ever get any patience."

"says you," you replied with a frown. "i'm super patient," you argued, but you had a hard time believing your own words. not that you were determined to change ellie's mind, anyway. your thoughts were elsewhere.

"maybe," ellie mumbled suddenly, catching you slightly off guard. you slip off into your own thoughts entirely too easily. "if you're always with those kids. i couldn't fucking stand it."

"i guess that's true. it just feels.. different? i don't know." your slight laugh turns into a yawn as you shake your head. "jesse told me you guys are trying to put more people on patrol?"

ellie nodded, rolling her eyes. "yeah. 'been a pain in the ass, that's for sure."

"that bad, huh?" you questioned, toying with the hem of your cardigan that you had thrown over your pajamas.

"i'm just.. i don't like the teaching stuff. i just want to get it done, you know?"

you nodded, and wondered if that's why ellie has seemed more exhausted than usual. "i get it. you can't blame maria for pairing people with you, though."

"i wish she wouldn't."

"yeah, but ellie, you're one of the best. you know that."

ellie shook her head, causing more strands of hair to frame her face. you could've laughed at her dedication to leaving the few strands still pulled back in a bun, instead of just taking it out entirely.

"maybe i should sign up," you said, partly joking. "finally give patrol a real try.

"no," ellie responded firmly, a little too quickly. you had only been kidding, you knew you would be no good, but regardless her reaction was a little much.

"why not?"

"because you can't.. you're not.. it's just, not your thing, alright?" ellie huffed.

you crossed your arms and wanted to be offended but ellie was right. you were no good for it. still, you rolled your eyes and refused to make eye contact until your name slipped from ellie's lips like an apology.

"just forget it, alright?" ellie pleaded, her voice regaining its softness.

you looked at her, the lighting was dim but your eyes were adjusted to the dark that had fallen over the room. she felt the most familiar like this, like your ellie.

ellie was softer in the moonlight. maybe she felt more like herself in it, too. the way she looked now - messy hair, pink cheeks, almost gave you a dreamlike feeling as if you could spill your guts to her and everything would be fine.

"alright," you murmured, allowing your eyes to lock with ellie's green ones. the darkness was safe, you wouldn't shy under her gaze. you were brave. "i was only kidding anyway. and i know that you only said no because you know that i would be the best at patrol and steal your crown."

"okay, you need to go to sleep," ellie replied simply. she stood from the floor, stretching and fidgeting with her hoodie.

"you hate when i have fun," you mumbled bitterly as ellie crossed to your window, closing the curtains. they didn't provide much coverage, but the room was suddenly consumed with less light than before.

"you hate when i'm right." ellie reached her hand down to you, and you allowed yourself to be pulled up from the floor. ellie pulled back the bedding as you discarded your cardigan onto the floor.

there was a couch in the living room. plenty of blankets and pillows for a comfortable enough spot on the floor. sharing the bed was never a discussion, you just did. you never really considered otherwise. it didn't really seem like ellie ever did either. if she did, she didn't show it.

you tried to swallow your feelings as you slid into bed next to ellie, wondering if it was normal to always share a bed like this. wondering if it was normal to always overthink it.

"if i threw my sweater on the ground like that, you would be pissed at me," ellie remarked. you could hear the smile in her tone.

you couldn't help but roll your eyes at her exaggeration, and you hoped that she could see it. "bullshit, i would not."

despite your tone, you wanted nothing more than to reach out and swipe away the strands of hair covering ellie's face.

you honestly could have. you knew ellie wouldn't have minded, not in the privacy of your dim room. you would have, but it felt wrong if your feelings weren't purely platonic. you couldn't live in denial forever, at least not when it came to your feelings for ellie.

"liar," ellie mumbled, leaning on her arm. the proximity was daunting.

you couldn't do anything but shake your head. you certainly liked to keep a tidy space, not much like ellie, but you didn't mind her stuff around your room one bit.

"huh, that's what i thought," ellie said with a satisfied huff, as if your silence could be taken as agreement.

your brows furrowed instantly. surely she could read your expression.

"quit it," you sighed. "you're making things up. and being difficult," you added.

ellie shook her head, the remnants of her bun bobbing around the back of her neck.

"don't know what to tell you babe," she replied, the sarcasm in her voice prompting an eye roll from you.

"shut up and go to sleep," you complained, picking up your pillow and tossing it over her face.

"ow, what the hell?" ellie whined. she was genuinely making a fuss and you laughed plainly at her. maybe she really hadn't changed that much over the years. at least not when it was just the two of you.

"don't say ow. pillows don't hurt," you said simply. your lack of concern made ellie's jaw drop as she leaned forward and twisted to the side, looking over you as you rested your back against the soft mattress.

ellie was practically looming over you. you stifled a nervous giggle but didn't bother tearing your eyes away from ellie's.

she stared at you for a moment, any hint of a joke on her face quickly leaving. ellie looked like she was going to say something at first, but maybe she had forgotten or changed her mind because she only remained silent as if she were studying you.

the steadiness of her gaze began to make you uncomfortable as nerves swirled around your stomach. ellie's eyes flickered over your face, and you would've done anything to read her mind. was she actually annoyed or was it something else? ellie's lips parted slightly and your breath hitched, guilty once again for the thoughts clouding your mind.

you sat up to break the tension, say a stupid joke maybe, but you moved too quickly and your face was too close to ellie's now. before you had a moment to feel embarrassed, ellie pressed a palm to your chest and promptly shoved you back down. you fell back against the bed with a huff.

the moment of whatever it was was quickly erased as ellie tore her gaze away from you and settled back into her spot.

you didn't speak again and neither did ellie. she simply handed you your pillow and turned on her side, putting her back to you. you remained still for too long, trying desperately to settle your breathing.

you held a heavy hand over your chest, pressing down firmly as you attempted to set your mind straight.

thoughts of just friends, don't fuck up- plagued your mind for only what you could've assumed to be hours on end.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

you left ellie alone in your bed that morning.

you tried not to wonder how it would make her feel as you pulled on your cardigan from the floor and tip toed out of the room.

she must've been exhausted.

the mornings were still cold before the sunshine had a chance to warm up the earth around you, so you walked quickly through the quiet streets of jackson.

there were some people, of course, out and about, but not quite as often as usual considering it was the weekend.

you were lucky.

you were lucky to know ellie and lucky to have ellie. that could be enough. you never wanted to lose her, so you could never do anything that would cause you to lose her. you were lucky, and you would be happy to swallow your feelings and keep a secret as long as it resulted in your friendship always remaining.

your hands balled into fists at your sides, mentally pushing away any stray, worrying thoughts.

"where are you goin' all dressed up this morning?"

you halted at the familiar voice, your cheeks sheepishly growing warm at the teasing. regardless, your smile was genuine.

"to dina's, i think," you replied, turning to meet tommy. you looked down at your pajama pants and top, realizing the cardigan didn't disguise it as much as you had hoped.

tommy had been the first person to ever give you a break. even though you were already a teenager when they brought you into jackson, tommy and joel practically raised you up more than anybody else ever had. with adeline hollis included, they were the closest thing to family you ever had.

"everything alright?" he questioned, frown lines deepening.

"of course, why?" you responded, squinting curiously at the older man.

"oh, nothin'. just, ellie isn't with you is all."

you swallowed hard, swatting at the air to distract from the fact that your smile had tightened. "she's sleeping!" then, for good measure, you changed the subject. "are you getting back from patrol?"

"yes ma'am," tommy replied in a way that drew a laugh out of you.

"you better go get some sleep too then," you warned, and he waved you away.

"go on, get outta here," tommy gruffed, sending you on your way.

your steps were more hurried now and you bounced nervously on your feet when you reached dina's front door.

you figured it was your best bet.

you knocked three times, and you only had to wait a few moments before the door creaked open an inch.

"hey honey, what's the matter?" dina inquired, eyebrows rising in concern as she looked at you.

you noticeably deflated. "what? why does everybody keep asking me that?" you laughed, and it sounded a little too forced. "i'm fine!"

dina scanned your features but visibly relaxed at your words, opening the door wider. "what's up then?"

"i was wondering if- hi jesse," you cut yourself off as his figure appeared in the doorway.

"is everything okay?" he asked, placing a gentle hand on dina's shoulder.

you groaned, causing a look of bewilderment to cross jesse's face.

"she's fine," dina murmured, offering you a small smile.

"i just wanted to ask if you guys wanted to go to the tipsy bison. with me. and ellie, probably." you offered, clasping your hands together in front of you.

"it's pretty early, i don't think seth would even- ow!"

dina cut jesse off with a jab. "when?" she asked, which pleased you very much.

"meet at sunset?" you suggested hopefully, eyes darting between the couple.

you were thrilled when they agreed. of course, they had said, and you left them to enjoy their morning.

on your walk back to your house, you forced yourself to breathe steady. ellie would probably be awake, and that was fine. you were friends, and that was fine. lucky. the best gift you could ask for.

you plastered a smile on your face, swallowing down every negative feeling and emotion.

you were in a good mood. you had to be.

*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

tags :

@dinoastronaut @skylerwhitwyo @muthafuckingstargirl @minustwofingers @mirrorballels @macaroni676

#ellie williams x reader #ellie williams x female reader #ellie williams x you #ellie tlou x reader

241 notes · View notes