#i'm still on the first season of lost lmao
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finniestoncrane · 20 days ago
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i am reacting pathetically to sawyer with his stupid glasses reading to the baby about some car
giddy, foolish, completely embarrassing
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aq2003 · 1 year ago
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there comes a beautiful time in life where i have to ask myselg th question, "did i accidentally project too hard onto the character that i only relate to a little bit and in doing so hugely missed this one entire aspect/interpretation of the characters . am i stupid"
#ARE THEY STUPID!#dr who#this is about ten specifically his relationship w martha lmao#m being so serious i genuinely did not. see the 'ten was on purpose leading martha on to make her think her feelings were requited' angle#until going out into the wild and reading the tumblr posts. like i genuinely did not. at ALLLLLL. its like a brick hitting my head#bc the ENTIRE time s3 ten came off to me as 'doing stuff w no romantic intent behind it but would consistently get misinterpreted as such'#cuz IIIIIIIII have done this. IIIIIIII have run into this problem before. and it sucks so incredibly bad.#i actually do want to think my og interpretation still holds water cuz like. well i could gather all the evidence but#first one that comes 2 mind would be him going 'it's like when you fancy someone + they dont know you exist' to martha. in episode TWELVE#two routes; either ten is needlessly cruel and callous even after a season's worth of building up trust and friendship w her#or he is on super 'i dont think she has feelings for me and this is a very unhappy coincidence of a line' cocaine#Or the 'she fancied me' line in s4 to donna. either he is disregarding all the good and positive impact she did him. or the fact that this#went over his head the whole time made him look back on that time w discomfort <- I DID THIS. I MIGHT HAVE BEEN PROJECTING#THIS ONTO HIM. AM I STUPID.?.?????#you know how mikage rgu can either be read as an incel or a gay man lost so completely in the sauce#ten is like in this same ballpark. i think. of 'emotionally manipulative and disrespects women' or 'aroacespec and missed the cues'#funniest possible options to pick from. ten my brother how did you set yourself up like this#absolutely not denying that he was toxic and unhealthy during s3 in like 500 ways btw. but well. ths is the one concwpt that#flew over my head. so completely. and i can kind of see it now but i also still find it hard to incorporate into my belief system#bc its like. brother I'M aroace and missed the cues too lol#tangential note we can trace many problems down to a writer's room filled w white people not giving#martha's character the respect/agency she deserves for the existing narrative she has. bc they pulled this w mickey too both in series 1+2#if they wanted to portray ten as manipulative then him and martha should've been given more screentime#together where martha (or anyone else) calls him the FUCK out on this. and ten would need to suffer narrative consequences of doing smth#as fucked up as that rather than his happy stable dynamic he has w donna. if they wanted to portray him as oblivious then marthas character#shouldn't have constantly been boiled down to an unrequited crush (particularly her dialogue in the s3 finale - there's a LOT more reasons#why she would choose to leave/why their dynamic was unhealthy besides ten not returning her feelings)#if you read all these tags you may be entitled 2 financial compensation#ten and martha#aspec doc tag
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kdranime · 21 days ago
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timelessbian · 5 months ago
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the funny thing about ouat is that we really were all watching completely different versions of the same show bc i straight up do not remember half of what goes on in the later seasons, but then it'll hit the obligatory sq scene and i'll realize ohhhh it's this episode and by funny i mean i want a&e on trial for their crimes
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talentforlying · 1 year ago
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also forgot to post about it yesterday, but i have designated december 2nd as constantine's official catch-up day with his niece gemma!! they don't see each other often since she "quit magic for good" (or is very good at pretending she has) but the holidays are a hard time for them both and it's too awkward to explain every year why you avoid your last living relative, so they've agreed on early december for an annual short dinner and chat. sometimes they call on christmas day, but they never meet up; neither of them wants to do christmas without cheryl.
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astonmartinii · 4 months ago
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(piano) keys to your heart | charles leclerc social media au
pairing: charles leclerc x fem fan reader
who knew the fan stages could be so romantic?
MASTERLIST | TIP JAR
f1
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liked by liamlawson30, yukitsunoda0511 and 1,340,667 others
tagged: charles_leclerc, georgerussell63, lewishamilton, oscarpiastri & landonorris
f1: it's always chaos at the fan stages
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user1: what is in the air today?
user2: i think it's so early in the season that they haven't lost the will to live yet
user3: there's still light in their eyes LMAO
lewishamilton: let me just say... that was an experience
georgerussell63: i wish all media commitments were this entertaining
lewishamilton: we can only pray
user4: wait i'm so lost what happened at this damn fan stage
user5: there was a girl with a baby toy piano who played one of charles' songs for him 😭
user6: and he was SO IMPRESSED
user7: he was impressed? I WAS IMPRESSED like it sounded so good and it has five keys that make ANIMAL NOISES
user8: aniMAL NOISES???
pierregasly: i think i watched that man fall in love in real time
charles_leclerc: are you not also enchanted?
pierregasly: by animal sounds? no?
charles_leclerc: so rude! you wouldn't know real art even if it hit you in the face
pierregasly: nuh uh !!!
user9: girlies i do think he might be in love what is going on?
user10: has he even spoken to her other than through hundreds of people on a microphone?
charles_leclerc: can a hopeless romantic live ?
user11: yeah it's terminal people
user12: well i'm not gonna lie if someone learnt my music on such an esteemed instrument i'd also be flattered
charles_leclerc: EXACTLYYYYYY
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yourusername
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liked by pierregasly, charles_leclerc and 12,309 others
yourusername: got to play a pretty boy piano this weekend, what about you?
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user15: PIANO WOMAN MY QUEEN
user16: you have a real piano?
yourusername: where do you think i honed my skills in order to play it on such a crazy model
yourbff: MAMA THERE'S 12,000 PEOPLE ON YOUR POST 💜
yourusername: act natural
yourbff: how can i ACT NATURAL BABE THE HOTTEST MAN IN THE WORLD IS IN YOUR LIKES
yourusername: as he should be
yourbff: i know for a fact you are not that chill rn ... i can hear you screaming from my house
yourusername: *harmonising
user17: we're all stalkers for being here but i'm pleasantly surprised with how funny she is
yourusername: damn ask me out on a date first
user18: so you are single queen?
yourusername: chronically so ...
charles_leclerc: i FOUND YOU
pierregasly: * i found you
oscarpiastri: not that i want the title of chief stalker but it was me (you have very niche mutual friends with my sisters)
yourusername: OMG OSCAR !!!!!!!!!!!! (tell hattie i said hi and take me to the next kpop concert)
charles_leclerc: so fuck me i guess
yourusername: i would love to fuck you, yes
charles_leclerc: oh hehehehehehehehehe
yourbff: for a man who is the sexiest in every room he's in, you're embarrassingly easy to please
lewishamilton: he's not the sexiest in every room, that is lewis hamilton erasure
yourbff: WHAT THE FUCK
user19: so is like all of the current f1 grid here?
maxverstappen1: i'm just here to watch charles embarrass himself
danielricciardo: i am retired but i must be interested in the exploits of my countrymen
pierregasly
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liked by yukitsunoda0511, charles_leclerc and 885,489 others
tagged: charles_leclerc & kika.c.gomez
pierregasly: he's making us take a flight on our one week off
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user20: deadass if they're going to australia
user21: these are levels that i would actually completely expect from charles
user22: pierre and kika are better than me because a flight to AUSTRALIA oh no baby
maxverstappen1: well this is an update that SOMEONE (i'm talking about you pierre) forgot to put in the group chat
pierregasly: i'm kind of in the middle of a flight and sat to the nosiest motherfucker in the world
charles_leclerc: what group chat?
georgerussell63: nothing!
oscarpiastri: nothing!
landonorris: nothing!
alexalbon: nothing!
maxverstappen1: we're laughing about how down bad you are behind your back 👍
charles_leclerc: thanks max!
charles_leclerc: WAIT?
user23: oh charles how can you be so smart yet so dumb
user24: all brain power goes to f1 and piano
user25: and piano girl now apparently
yourbff: you're not being serious ....
pierregasly: deadly
yourusername: this is so charming
yourbff: this man is flying 24 HOURS TO SEE HER ???
yourusername: i'm not appreciating your tone rn
yourbff: oh no you're more than worth it pookie but DAMN the air miles
charles_leclerc: i chartered a private jet :D
yourbff: you're crazy
yourusername: i'm in love with you?
user26: guys i think they're just as insane as each other
user27: a match made in heaven i fear
liked by charles_leclerc & yourusername
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yourusername
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liked by yourbff, charles_leclerc and 41,298 others
tagged: charles_leclerc, pierregasly & kika.c.gomez
yourusername: guys there's a cute guy at my door (and a guy with a bad hairline but he doesn't matter (i love you kika))
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user29: chat - it's never been so over i fear
user30: we've lost him
yourusername: :P
user31: she's so unserious i love her
user32: i know every other wag wants to be this in our face so i respect it
charles_leclerc: i'm very happy to be the cute guy at your door
yourusername: you best be :)
charles_leclerc: i'm here to swipe you off your feet
yourusername: believe me you won't have to do much
charles_leclerc: i saw you have a proper piano ...
yourusername: you don't want to serenade me with my animal noise piano ???
user33: so like this is real? how did this actually happen?
user34: like surely they had met before this - it can't be the animal sounds piano of monaco that did it
user35: have you ever considered that maybe someone doing something as ridiculous but as time consuming as that is incredibly endearing
charles_leclerc: my love language is acts of service :)
pierregasly: i am sat in your living room and you're blasting my hairline on instagram?
yourusername: yes!
pierregasly: you know what? you two are perfect for each other
yourusername: i know :D
user36: oh to be a girl who has charles flying across the world for her
user37: if we get a video of them playing piano it might just kill me
maxverstappen1: interesting.... very interesting....
yourusername: can i help you?
maxverstappen1: just observing ....
yourusername: you're observing very loudly
charles_leclerc
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liked by maxverstappen1, alexalbon and 1,894,300 others
tagged: yourusername
charles_leclerc: obviously we had to take the real piano for a drive
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user38: killing myself <3
user39: the most rational reaction
user40: THEY'RE SO FUCKING CUTE (i want to die)
yourusername: as if you needed to be any more handsome
charles_leclerc: i gotta match your beauty some how
yourusername: SHUT THE FUCK UP
yourusername: YOU'RE SO CUTE
yourusername: and also objectively the most beautiful man in the world
lewishamilton: once again, stop lying to him please 🙏
yourusername: okay queen..... whatever you wanna hear
user41: lewis not being in the GC but always being here to stunt on charles is killing me
user42: getting in the psychological warfare for next year
yourusername: lewis hamilton psychological warfare (immovable object) vs sleep deprived y/n y/ln (unstoppable force)
lewishamilton: YOU'VE KNOWN HIM MAX A WEEK ???
yourusername: there's no set timeline for love girlypop
maxverstappen1: piano? this is boring
yourusername: i would post me treating him the way he should but that would violate instagram's guidelines sorry!
charles_leclerc: no !!! i don't wanna share you with anyone
maxverstappen1: i don't wanna see all that anyway
charles_leclerc: don't lie buddy
yourusername: you're just intimidated :P
user43: couples who bully max together, stay together
maxverstappen1: it seems that way ...
yourusername: omg we're so couple goals
charles_leclerc: we so are <3333
user44: CONFIRMATION???
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yourusername
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liked by maxverstappen1, yourbff and 68,309 others
tagged: charles_leclerc
yourusername: guess i'm a recording artist now? oh and i have a bf, he's there i guess?
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user46: oh they want me dead
user47: ignoring this for my mental health
user48: they're 😭 so 😭 cute 😭 i'm 😭 so 😭 happy 😭 for 😭 you
charles_leclerc: no one i'd rather work with!! we've been in a whirlwinf but i'm glad i have you
yourusername: you have had the (piano) keys to my heart long before we met
charles_leclerc: i still had to charm you though ;)
yourusername: oh i was smitten straight away i was just trying to play it cool
pierregasly: you weren't very convincing
yourusername: i was ???
yourbff: the day you found out he was flying over to aus you did 20,000 steps just pacing in the living room
yourusername: well...
charles_leclerc: i found it very cute no worries
user49: they're so hilariously embarrassing for each other it's so cute
user50: i mean they're both insanely attractive so yeah i'd be just as nervous around them
user51: everyone is just hating on their whimsical love
arthurleclerc: so you're official and you've still not met us 🤨🤨🤨
yourusername: well............. i'm in aus what do you want me to do about that?
arthurleclerc: charles irresponsibly uses a private jet - i expect to see you for dinner this weekend ! (that's an order from maman)
yourusername: CHARLES I CAN'T LET YOUR MUM DOWN
maxverstappen1: does this mean i might get air max back in europe?
yourusername: you've been hating this whole time but it was YOUR JET THAT GOT CHARLES HERE?
maxverstappen1: and what?
yourusername: i'm just observing, loudly
charles_leclerc: he loves me really <3
yourusername: but not too much 🤨
charles_leclerc
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liked by maxverstappen1, yourbff and 2,398,099 others
tagged: yourusername
charles_leclerc: i am never complaining about media again
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user52: so when i do an interpretative dance as a cat to seduce max then what?
maxverstappen1: if you dare do that anywhere near me i am getting a restraining order
user52: anyone tell you you're no fun?
maxverstappen1: all the time, i'm still not going to fuck someone dressed as a cat 👍
yourusername: loving you is the easiest thing in the world
charles_leclerc: the most natural thing in my life - we were made for each other
yourusername: forged by the gods for each other and they decided to give me the prettiest boy in the world
yourusername: @lewishamilton i dare you to say otherwise
charles_leclerc: she's so protective 🤭🤭🤭
roscoelovescoco: ...
yourusername: i'll still fight your dog i have no shame when it comes to defending my man
user53: see this ^^ is appropriate action for wags i too would fight a bull dog to defend charles' honour
yourusername: it's the least i can do
charles_leclerc: i will literally run someone over with my ferrari
yourusername: considering i've seen your road parking - that's a real threat, so romantic
pierregasly: so i really am stuck with this for the rest of my life?
yourusername: it doesn't have to be a long life
pierregasly: you're breaking up with charles ???
yourusername: i'm threatening your life 👍
pierregasly: oh!
charles_leclerc: so romantic
user54: childhood friends being thrown under the bus? this is real romance
user55: and this all started with an animal sounds piano?
yourusername: i owe my baby cousin everything
charles_leclerc: does she want a ferrari?
fin.
note: HAPPY CHARLES LECLERC BIRTHDAY DAY TO ALL WHO CELEBRATE
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formula-ghost · 1 month ago
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Read Your Diary (FC43 x fem!reader)
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Chapter 5: Valentine (FINALE)
CHAPTER SUMMARY: The end of the 2024 F1 season brings regret and a newfound desire for reconciliation—but is your relationship with Franco beyond saving?
WORD COUNT: 13k
WARNINGS: Sadness. Angry Hispanic mother. Creepy men in bars (not Franco ofc). Drinking, drunk Franco is a media menace. Use of the word whore jokingly. Smut 18+ MINORS DNI. Hickeys, hair pulling. Dom Franco and sub reader, use of good girl, light choking, Oral (m receiving), p in v, protected sex (wrap it before you tap it!)
SERIES TAGLIST:  @scopeiguess @storyteller-le @xivilivix @htpssgavi @wierdflowerpower @justsisse  @uncreativetm  @ncrsbrg  @tillyt04 @amz824 @ellelabelle
A/N: My baby is now complete!! I did not plan for this to be the ending originally, but as I was writing it just kind of came about, and who am I to anger the writing Gods? Honestly, though, the beginning of this chapter destroyed me trying to find a way to redeem Franco. Fun fact, I very loosely based my depiction of Franco off of my real life ex, which explains why he is so horrible lmao (but unlike my real life ex, Franco has been redeemed!). I cannot express how grateful I am for everyone’s support throughout the writing of this story. More to come, but for now, enjoy!
Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4
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All this love, I'm so choked up, I can feel you in my blood
All this lust for just one touch, I'm so scared to give you up
Valentine, my decline is so much better with you
Valentine, my decline, I'm always running' to you
Valentine, Valentine
The block button did nothing to assuage Franco’s obsession with you. In fact, it only made it worse.
If he hadn’t blocked you, he would at least know that you weren’t contacting him. But since he pressed the button, there was now the ever present question of if you had reached out, and if the digital barrier he erected had led it to be lost forever. 
But why would you reach out after what he had done? 
Truthfully, it took everything in you to not call him. You had both said things you didn’t mean—at least, you prayed that Franco didn’t mean them—and you wanted nothing more than to just make up and act like it never happened. 
But the words kept echoing in your mind at night when you couldn’t sleep. You were a distraction.
All the years of supporting him, all the sacrifices you made—all for nothing. 
You couldn’t help that you loved him. And the Franco you knew and loved didn’t mean those things. He couldn’t. 
So you checked your phone’s international clock. It was still night where you were at home, but morning in Abu Dhabi, where he’d be completing his last F1 race tomorrow. 
There was still time. If you called and made up now, you could be there for the final race. You could be there at the end, just like you had been there at all of his beginnings.
So you swallowed your pride, tapped on his name in your contacts, and pressed call. But it didn’t even ring before it hung up. You knew what that meant. He had blocked you.
At first you wanted to puke. You wanted to burst down the stairs of your apartment and run into the street screaming. You wanted to throw a bottle of wine on the walls and cry in the wreckage.
But after a few hours of getting all the crying out, a strange peace fell over you.
It was just… over. That was that.
In the morning, however, the grief came back from a familiar notification. His mother.
You had been putting off her messages ever since your argument with Franco. You couldn’t bear to tell her what had happened. But she was worried about you, evident by her increasingly concerned messages.
You finally gathered the courage to type up a response.
Hi Mami, you began—she had forbidden you to call her by her name, instead telling you to call her Mom—I tried to talk to Franco like you asked. It didn’t go well, and we both said a lot of hurtful things. It ended on bad terms and he ended up canceling all my passes and flights, and I think he blocked me. I’m sorry, I tried to get through to him. Thank you for all the kindness you’ve shown me over the years <3
You read over what you’d typed. It was honest. You could have spared her more of the details, but why? Franco would have to live with the consequences of his actions. That wasn’t your problem.
It was only a few moments later that she responded. Oh dear, I am so sorry. I am ashamed of Franco—that is not the son I raised. I hope you know we all love you, and I wish you all the best.
You liked her message and left it at that. But she called you later that night.
She began, “YN, words can’t describe how sorry I am. What happened?”
“I… I don’t know,” you began, carefully choosing your words. You weren’t quite sure how much you wanted to tell her. “He was already upset when I got there. He kept accusing me of lecturing him, but I was just trying to tell him I was worried. He said… that I was a distraction.”
“I can’t believe him! You have never been a distraction. You’ve been there for him when we couldn’t, we’ve always been so grateful for you.” Her admission nearly brought tears to your eyes. “I just… Dios Mio.” 
The conversation was short, but vulnerable. 
“YN, can I ask you something?” 
“Of course.”
“You had feelings for him, didn’t you?” She asked it as if it were a statement, rather than a question.
You were silent for a beat before answering. “I did. I… I do.”
“Oh, dear, I wish I was there to give you a hug.” You could feel the care in her voice, a soothing comfort. “I want you to know you’re always welcome here, no matter what my idiot son says.”
You chuckled, thanking her for her kindness before ending the call. You were truly grateful for her invitation, but you couldn’t imagine being in Argentina without Franco. The call had felt more like a farewell. 
In Abu Dhabi, Franco was having his own farewells. It was bittersweet; he had worked so hard for so long to get here, but he couldn’t wait for it to be over. He was exhausted, mentally and physically. He just wanted to go home.
Home—the only place he felt like he had left. His Madrid apartment would feel empty without your laughter echoing in the halls. But back in Argentina, the people still loved him, and he could come back to a warm, home-cooked meal.
It was the only thing on his mind as he was forced to retire the car early, ending his last F1 race of 2024 with a DNF. But he didn’t care about that at all when he stepped off his flight from Abu Dhabi to Buenos Aires. 
Unfortunately for him, what was waiting for him at home was not peace and a warm meal. It was a very angry Hispanic mother. 
He came through the door, jet lagged, struggling with his luggage. She didn’t help him. 
When his father and sister ran up to give him a hug and help him in, she didn’t move an inch. She just stayed in the kitchen, silently chopping vegetables with her recently sharpened knife.
After putting away his bags into his room, Franco made his way to the kitchen to greet his mother, who didn’t even look up from her cutting board.
“Hi Mami, I’m home,” he said tentatively.
“Welcome home,” she replied, no warmth in her voice.
“Aren’t you excited to see me?” he joked. He knew he was dodging landmines. He knew she had every right to be angry—he had gotten caught up in everything after Singapore, and after his controversy, he had been dodging her calls and texts, other than to arrange plans to come home for the holidays. Others may have gotten over their frustration, or chose to ignore it for the sake of the holidays. She was not that kind of woman. 
“Oh, I’m thrilled,” she said, her voice flat. “Dinner is almost ready. Can you set the table for five, please?”
“Five? There’s only 4 of us.”
“Well, isn’t YN going to join us?” She already knew the answer. She just wanted to see him squirm as he answered it. He had nowhere to run anymore. 
“Uh… no. Not this year.”
“And why would that be?”
“She’s, uh, busy.” His mother didn’t respond. He had to fill the awkward silence. “And she’s probably mad at me…”
She paused, holding the knife in an iron grip. She lifted it from the cutting board to point towards him. “And why would that be, Franco?”
“Mami…”
“Do not lie to me.” Her voice was cold as ice.
“Mami, it’s complicated. I don’t want to talk about it. I just want to enjoy the holidays and forget about this whole season.”
“I’m sure you do,” she concluded, not an ounce of sympathy in her voice. Franco sighed, getting down the plates to set the table for his family. But he stopped in his tracks when he turned and felt a slipper to the back of his head. 
“Ah! What was that for?” The blow didn’t hurt anything but his ego.
“You know what you did,” his mother seethed. “You can’t run from this forever. Now get out of my kitchen.”
Franco obeyed, muttering under his breath. 
“What was that?” his mother asked.
“Nothing!” he chirped, setting the plates on the table.
During dinner, it wasn’t any better. His father and sister, oblivious to his mother’s rage, chatted as if nothing had happened. They had been angry at his…questionable dating decisions, yes, but they clearly had let it go in the meantime and decided to just enjoy the time together as a family. His mother, however, had not. 
And whenever anyone asked about it, she said she was fine. But she was clearly not fine. 
As Franco took the dishes into the kitchen to help clean up after dinner, he sighed, knowing that his mother was right. He couldn’t go the entire holiday ignoring it—she would make sure of that.
He couldn’t sleep that night. The bed of his childhood home was warm and comforting, but he couldn’t relax under the weight of it all.
Maybe some fresh air would do him good. That’s what he reasoned when he slid open the back door and inhaled the cool night air. He sat cross legged on the back terrace, just taking in the sounds of the serene night. 
That was, until he heard another person closing the door behind him. His mother. 
“Not now, Mami,” he said, not even turning to look at her.
“I’m not going to chastise you.” She handed him a mug of something warm. For a moment they just sat next to each other, sipping their drinks in silence. 
Franco began to speak unprompted. “YN has every right to be angry at me. I…ruined everything. I was so cruel to her.”
His mother just gave him a reassuring hum.
He continued, “She had feelings for me. I know I should have known it sooner, but I was in denial. But I had feelings for her too. And I got distracted. But it wasn’t her fault. I was so worried about my future that I ignored how she had always been there in my past.” 
The mug in his hands trembled and his voice wavered. “She was always there for me. Every race, every win, every failure. She was always there.”
His mother reached for him, lovingly stroking his back as he confessed.
“She probably hates me now. I don’t blame her.” A tear fell into his mug. He turned to look at his mother, her expression far more sympathetic than it was at dinner. “Can I fix it?”
“I don’t know. But first of all, you owe her an apology.”
“I know.”
“No, you don’t. Because if you did, you would have already done it.” He was silent. “It’s possible that she will forgive you. Or, she may not. You have to accept that.”
“I don’t know what I’d do without her.”
“Franco,” she began, “you did this. You have to suffer through the consequences of your actions. And if you are lucky enough that she forgives you and wants you back in your life, it’ll be a hell of a lot of work to regain her trust.” 
He nodded. “I’ll do it. I’d do anything.”
“Then why haven’t you?”
He paused. “I’m scared. Scared that it really is beyond saving.”
“The longer you wait, the more likely that is to be true.” 
This time, he actually knew what he needed to do.
Neither of you knew the parallels between you two; each of you pining for the other’s love, wanting nothing more than just to speak to the other. And when he unblocked you and called, it was like the stars aligned.
You didn’t answer. 
He didn’t panic at first. It was close to the holidays, in the middle of the day in your timezone. Maybe you were with your family. 
But as one missed call turned to two, and days of no contact turned to weeks, Franco began to know the bitter taste of his own medicine.
You had seen him call. And yes, you were with your family at the time. You told yourself that was the main reason why you hadn’t answered. As if seeing his contact on your phone didn’t shatter your heart into a million pieces. 
But later that night, when you were finally alone, you couldn’t bring yourself to call him back. He hadn’t left any voicemail or text, just his name and a missed call icon. 
What would you even say to him? He knew you were angry. And you knew you couldn’t just act as if nothing happened.
So despite your desperation to speak to him again, you just let his calls keep coming and coming over the weeks. 
A dark part of you enjoyed having his attention. You waited to see his icon pop up, just to let the call go to voicemail. It made you feel wanted again. 
And you were wanted. When he tried to sleep at night, he wanted you. When he talked with his manager about future plans for the next season—back down to F2—he wanted you. 
Both of you knew it was a delicate balance. He couldn’t keep calling forever. At some point you’d have to answer, or he’d have to stop. But you loved the dark thrill of pushing it. 
And this continued for weeks.
The calls lessened as the F2 season began. Franco was back at work. You had finally let go of the need to watch his races.
But there was another contact you hadn’t ignored: Lily. 
She called you out of the blue one day. “YN! I feel like I haven’t seen you in forever.”
The last time you saw her—it must have been Austin—felt like years ago.  
“Yeah, it’s been a while,” you replied. 
“Do you… wanna talk about how you’ve been?” It was late January now. You had spent the weeks just passing time, lost, but somehow also at peace with all of it.
“Um… not if you don’t want to ruin your day,” you joked. Humor was a good coping mechanism, you had learned. You’d grown tired of explaining to people why Franco was no longer in your life. You had once been so intertwined, and now, nothing. You were thankful that she didn’t press further. 
“Well, we should go out,” she suggested. “I know a great new club in Madrid, and Rebecca and I will be there the weekend before Valentine’s Day.”
Valentine’s Day. The bane of your fucking existence. Worst holiday ever.
But you had spent Christmas in a daze, and New Years alone. You didn’t know if you could do another holiday like that, so acutely aware of Franco’s absence. So you agreed. 
But Lily’s phone call wasn’t as out of the blue as you had thought.
One thing about Franco was that he was determined. If he wanted something, he was going to get it. So yes, he called and called and called and let all his calls be missed.
He couldn’t just text you or leave a voicemail. What he needed to say was too important. He needed to see you.  
So he called up the only other woman he knew besides you and his own mother: Lily. 
He pitched the idea simply. He just needed her to arrange something where you and him would meet. Lily was skeptical. 
“Franco, you know when a woman isn’t answering your calls, it’s usually because she doesn’t want to talk to you, right?” 
“I know,” he signed. “I know she’s pissed at me. She has every right to be. I just want to apologize to her.”
“Then why not, like, send her a letter or something? Trying to organize an event where she’s forced to see you is kind of…creepy.”
Deep down, he knew Lily was right. “It’s not like that, though. I just need to see her, say it to her face. If she gets angry and never wants to see me again, I’ll respect her wishes. But I love her too much to not try.”
Lily was a hopeless romantic if nothing else. And Franco was charismatic and too smooth to deny with his one-liners. 
So she agreed. Besides, she knew you needed a girls night.
And you realized it too when Rebecca and Lily came over to your apartment to get ready a few weeks later. 
You vented to them as they helped you apply your eyeliner and zip up your dress—yes, THAT dress—about how hard the past few weeks had been.
“And then,” you explained, as Rebecca dusted a brush along your cheekbones, “he told me that I didn’t need to be there! As if he wasn’t the one who begged me to go!”
Rebecca made a sour expression. “Girl,” she said, “Good riddance to him.”
When you looked at yourself in the mirror, you nearly gasped. You looked fucking amazing. 
Yes, you were wearing that dress that always reminded you of him—his favorite color, bought while on vacation to see his family. But if he couldn’t see your beauty, someone else would. And right now, that someone was Lily, as she snapped photos of you all before you left for the club and posted them on her story.
As you entered the club, you felt the bass in your bones. Yes, this was exactly what you needed. 
You drank. You danced. You felt the eyes of tipsy men on you.. And for a while, all your troubles faded away.
You approached the bar for your second drink of the night. A man walked next to you, presumably to order his own drink. You recognized him as someone you’d danced with earlier.
“You look great tonight,” he said, eyeing you up and down. His tone was too sleazy for your liking.
“Thanks,” you said, hoping a short response would end the exchange so you could get your drink and make your way back to Lily and Rebecca, who were waiting for you in a booth. 
“D’you always dance like that?”
“Like what?” 
He smirked. “You’re cute when you play dumb like that.”
You genuinely had no idea what the man was going on about. “Sorry, I need to get back to my friends.”
You turned to leave, but the man grabbed your arm. “Don’t you need to get your drink? Stay a minute.”
You grimaced, but a surge of anxiety kept you frozen to your spot. You turned your glaze to the floor, silently beginning for an out.
“So, what’s your name?”
“Uh…” You were unable to answer. You feigned ignorance. “Sorry, it’s loud in here, I can’t hear you.”
“Oh, it doesn’t matter. I don’t need to know your name to take you home tonight.”
“What?” You wanted to puke.
The man started to reach his arm out toward your waist. You stepped back and bumped into someone. You cursed your own awkwardness. When you turned to apologize, you saw a familiar face.
Franco. Fuck. You felt your stomach drop. 
“You know this guy?” The man behind you asked.
“She does,” Franco answered for you. You were grateful—you were unable to speak, choked with anxiety. 
“You let your girl act like that?” 
“Fuck off, mate.”
The man took the hint and shrugged, taking his drink and disappearing into the crowd. 
Your eyes were still glued to the floor. “Thank you,” you said. 
“Don’t thank me,” he said, “it’s the least I could do.”
The bartender handed you your drink. Part of you just wanted to go back to Lily and Rebecca and act like all of this never happened. But by the look of Franco’s face, one of grave seriousness, you knew it wouldn’t be that easy.
But the other part of you was thankful. Thankful that Franco had saved you from that creep, yes, but also thankful that the stars had aligned to bring you and your best friend back together. What were the odds?
Wait. Maybe the stars hadn’t aligned.
“Franco, what are you doing here?” 
Now it was him who looked to the floor in embarrassment. “Lily told me you were here. I asked her to help me talk to you.”
“So you… arranged to find me in a club, because I wasn’t answering your calls?” 
Franco may be Latino, but he sure had the audacity of a white man. 
“When you put it like that, it sounds bad…”
You rolled your eyes and walked away. He followed you through the crowd. 
“YN, wait! Why won't you answer my calls?”
“Because I have nothing to say to you.” That wasn’t true. You actually had a lot to say, you were just too afraid to say it.
“Okay, I get it. I fucked up. But will you just listen to me? Please?” 
You just kept walking. 
“YN! Please!” You had nearly reached the booths, and he was still following you. You just kept ignoring him. 
“YN—” You slammed down your drink on the table, startling Lily and Rebecca. When Franco came into view behind you, they exchanged knowing glances. 
You turned around to face him. “Are you really begging?” you whispered in a hushed tone. 
“Yes,” he said, his voice equally low. 
Lily got out of the booth, standing next to you. “What’s the harm in just hearing him out?” she said, low enough that he wouldn’t be able to hear her over the thumping bass. 
You swallowed. The harm? You would fall for him again. And he would hurt you again and again. You’d lose him again. A never ending cycle of pain. 
But his pleading expression in front of you was too much to bear. You couldn’t say no to the man you still loved.
“Let’s get some air, hm?” he said, and you nodded, silently following him back to the crowd. He led you to a staircase where a bouncer nodded and silently let the both of you pass. 
The staircase led to the roof of the club, with a beautiful view of the city. The space was clearly set up for patrons to enjoy, but there wasn’t a soul there besides you and Franco. 
The view took your breath away. You had seen so much beauty when you had traveled the world with Franco for his races, but this was home, and he was warm next to you as he snaked his arm around your waist, silently taking in the sight next to you.
You relaxed into the touch. For a moment, you just let everything fade away into the peaceful scene. 
But as you smelled Franco’s familiar cologne and relished the feeling of his touch, you couldn’t help the anxiety that rose in your throat. It felt like it was choking you. You moved forward, forcing his arm away, and leaned against the railing on the edge of the rooftop.
“Say what you have to say,” you said plainly. 
“I want to apologize.” His opening sentence was simple, yet powerful. “YN, I was horrible to you. I lied and I betrayed your trust. I blamed all my problems on you, when you were the only one who was ever there for me.”
You watched the cars on the road below, like ants in a colony.
He continued, “And you were right, about everything.” 
The silence in the air was thick.
Your voice was shaking when you began. “Franco, you made me feel like I was insane. You… you accused me of using you. You called me a distraction. You said I was disgusting. You uninvited me from the last races and you blocked me.”
“You tried to call?”
“Of course I did.” The tears in your eyes threatened to mess up your mascara that Rebecca had so carefully applied. “I tried to call you before Abu Dhabi. I wanted to forgive you and be there for your last race.”
“Shit, YN… I’m so fucking sorry.”
“I don’t know if I can forgive you now.”
It was him, now, who had eyes full of tears. “YN, I…I love you. I can’t lose you. I know I hurt you, and it kills me. But I miss my best friend. My friend who skipped prom to come to a race. My friend who helped me dry my clothes after she found me trying to use an oven to do it. My friend who is the only one that really gets my sense of humor.”
You finally broke down at his confession. He reached out to hold you.
“Don’t cry,” he whispered. “I’m here. It’s gonna be okay.”
He let you cry it out, before pulling back and looking at you. He gently used the pad of his thumb to wipe away your tears and fix your smeared makeup.
“I can’t ask for everything to go back to normal,” he said, looking you in the eyes. His eyes were teary, too. “I know I can’t. I did things that are beyond awful. But I promise you that if you can find it in your heart to forgive me, I’ll do whatever I can to regain your trust. You’re too important to me.”
All you could do was bury yourself in his chest. He wasn’t expecting the sudden gesture, but he slotted his arms around you like they always belonged there. He pressed a soft kiss to your forehead. You don’t know how long you stood there, warm in his embrace. You could have stayed there for years. 
You were brought out of the perfect scene by the sound of a notification on your phone. You broke the hug after a moment to check it. A text from Lily: everything okay?
You chuckled. “I think Lily is worried about us.”
“Well,” he asked, “is everything okay?”
He wanted an answer. You didn’t know if you could say it. 
But is this not what your entire journey had been leading up to? You had begun writing in your journal to communicate what you feel. And now, you had no choice. 
You were strong. You had changed.
“I want to forgive you,” you said. “But it won’t be easy. It’ll take time.”
“I have all the time in the world.”
“And I can’t promise that I won’t be scared or insecure.”
“Whatever you need, I’ll do. I’ll listen, I’ll show you—”
“Franco.” You cut him off. “I know. I love you.”
You couldn’t name the expression on his face. Like relief. Or love.
“Can I kiss you?” he asked. 
You were scared of what door that would open, of how much you truly wanted him to. So you didn’t speak. You just reached up to caress his cheek and tell him with your actions.
Your lips met his, and all the sorrow melted away. You could feel the vibrations of the club under your feet, the gentle pumping of blood through his veins, faster now that he could touch you. He pulled you in by the waist, and you brought your other hand to the back of his neck, making the space between you infinitesimally small. 
But you pulled away before he could deepen the kiss. You couldn’t rush it, no matter how badly you wanted it. 
When you opened your eyes, he had that expression you had grown to yearn for; it gave away how badly he needed more of you. You could feel a blush rise to your cheeks at the thought of his wanting.
“We should go back down before Lily gets too worried,” you said. He smiled and nodded, but as his expression of desire faded away, you saw the familiar signs of anxiety. He didn’t know how far to push, how comfortable to act. 
You grabbed his hand. “And then, you should dance with me.”
His tentative smile grew more relaxed. “Of course.”
Turns out, there’s nothing an honest conversation and a little alcohol couldn’t fix. And in the aftermath of the former, you definitely indulged in the latter—maybe a little too much. 
You went downstairs to retrieve your drink that Lily and Rebecca had so kindly watched for you. It was a little watered down from the ice melting, but it would do the trick. 
Rebecca helped you fix your makeup as Lily glared at Franco for making you cry. He knew he’d have work to do to earn back their trust, too, but he was more than willing. 
So when you were ready, he wasted no time taking you out to the dancefloor to give you the night of your life. 
The only problem was that Franco was not a frequent club goer, and therefore unable to handle his liquor. And you all had a lot to drink that night. 
You finally cut him off when he threatened to get on the table and start stripping. 
“Oh, Lord, Franco, I’m cutting you off, you’ve had too much to drink,” you slurred. You were tipsy yourself, in no state to talk, but at least you were committed to staying clothed for the night. 
“What are you gonna do? Fuck me about it?” he joked, sticking his tongue out playfully. 
You don’t know if the blush on your face was from the drinks or his taunting. But God, even when he was wasted, he looked so good. As the night had progressed, he had become more disheveled, his shirt buttons coming undone to expose his toned chest and a sheen of sweat from all the dancing. He leaned over, running a hand along your cheek. “Bet you would want that, wouldn’t you?” 
“Okay, time to get you home!” you told him. Lily and Rebecca had left a bit earlier, satisfied that their mission was accomplished. 
You got up and tried to corral your drunk friend out of the club. He didn't want to cooperate, though. 
“No, YN, I don’t want to go home! I missed you, dance with me!” He reached out to grab your waist, his hands wandering up and down your body. 
“Franco, you’re drunk,” you said, moving out of his grip. “I’m calling an Uber and getting you home.”
It’s not like his touch was unwelcome. But you were in public and he was inebriated, unable to consent to what he was actually doing. You knew it was time to go. 
You finally dragged him outside as you waited for the Uber on the corner. You hoped the cool night air would sober him up a bit.
“Have I told you that you look fucking gorgeous tonight?” he slurred. You ignored him as you watched the little car icon drive closer and closer. 
“I always loved that dress on you,” he continued, “but it’d look better off of you.”
“Our Uber is here!” you said through your blush. 
But even in the Uber, he was relentless. 
“I missed youuuuu” he cooed in your ear.
“I missed you too, but could you not be a whore for 5 minutes?” you laughed. You hoped the humor would distract him. He lowered his voice to a husky whisper.
“But YNNNNN, I want you so fucking badly. Every part of you, even the parts that you’re ashamed of—fuck, especially those parts. I want to know the version of you that you’re scared to be. I want you to use me like a toy to get what you want. And when I read what you wrote I was… fuck, I couldn’t stop myself. Every day I’d read it and touch myself and wish it was you. God, I just need to fuck you so badly—“ he practically moaned in your ear as his hand again reached to your waist.
You grabbed him by the wrist, stopping him in his tracks. His doe eyes looked up at you, deceptively innocent, hiding behind them the true depths of his lust.
You moved his hand away and let go. He was silent and still.
“Franco, you are drunk. I am going to get you home and you are going to get some rest.”
“I know you’re mad at me. You should be, I’m a fucking idiot,” he slurred. “But you can take it out on me, on my body—“
“Franco! We are in public,” you hissed through gritted teeth.
“Is being horny a crime? You can arrest me, put me in restraints—” 
The Uber pulled up in front of your apartment and you wasted no time getting Franco out of the car and up the stairs. You made sure to tip the driver well. 
Franco didn’t even let up as he collapsed on your bed, dizzy from stumbling up the stairs and into your apartment. He grabbed you, pulling you back to the bed, burying his face in your hair.
“You smell so good,” he muttered. You wrestled free from his grip, throwing a pillow back at him playfully. 
“I am not going to fuck you when you’re this drunk. Get changed and go to sleep.” 
He pouted, but complied, undressing agonizingly slowly behind you. You had turned away to give him privacy, but your mind wandered as you heard the shuffling of his clothes. 
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable,” he apologized, still behind you.
“You didn’t,” you said, and it was true; you loved that he wanted you, just…not in that setting. “Just sleep it off. I’ll take the couch.”
“No, come here,” he said, patting the side of the bed. You turned and jumped, seeing that instead of changing into the pair of old pajamas that he had left at your place many months ago that you had laid out for him, he had just stripped down to his underwear.
“Absolutely not,” you said, your face turning a bright red. “Put some clothes on.”
“But it’s hot in here!”
“Then I’ll take the couch.”
“YN just snuggle with me—”
You cut him off by closing the bedroom door. 
A few hours later, you were convinced that you had the world’s most uncomfortable couch. You couldn’t sleep a bit. 
You filled the hours by scrolling on your phone. The F1 gossip pages were calling your name. 
The reappearance of YN! The former friend (and suspected ex girlfriend) of Williams reserve driver Franco Colapinto was featured in a post from a nightclub in Madrid with current Williams wags Lily Muni He and Rebecca Donaldson. Several attendees also caught videos of her dancing with a mysterious man that is definitely not Franco. YN hasn’t been publicly seen since the 2024 Brazilian Grand Prix, which fans assume has something to do with Franco’s fling with a controversial Argentine actress.
Above the caption was a slideshow: the pictures of you, Lily, and Rebecca on the first slide, and the next being a video of you dancing with the creep. You cringed at the memory.
The top comment made you chuckle: I can’t believe Franco fumbled his 2025 seat AND a baddie. 
You scrolled to the next post. 
Former F1 driver for Williams, Franco Colapinto, spotted in a nightclub in Madrid getting very handsy with best friend YN! 
The two have not been seen together since the Brazilian Grand Prix in 2024. At the time, fans speculated that the two were dating, but sources close to the driver reported that a falling out regarding Franco’s dating controversies during the season led him to cancel her VIP pass for the last triple header.
But luckily for Franco x YN shippers, the pair seem to be quite comfortable with each other again. Do you think they’ll make it official soon? Comment your opinion below!
Fuck. Someone had gotten a video of you trying to get Franco out of the club, and without context, it looked bad.
You were pushing him off of you, yes, but not because you didn’t want his touch. You were just afraid of this exact scenario happening. You prayed a silent apology for his manager. 
Your scrolling was interrupted by the sound of Franco waking up and stumbling into your kitchen for a glass of water. Even with only a few hours of rest, he had slept off the drunkenness, but was left with a horrific hangover. 
You probably should have just pretended to be asleep until he went back to bed. But, against your better judgement, you got up to meet him at your kitchen counter.
He still hadn’t put any clothes on. Typical.
“You alive there?” you joked.
He downed his entire glass of water. “Barely,” he grimaced. “Worth it, though.”
You gave him a half smile. “You’re probably gonna have a million notifications from your manager. I tried my best.” You handed him your phone to watch the video.
“Jesus, that’s how I looked? I’m sorry.”
“I didn’t mind. But it’s a good thing that you probably don’t remember what you said.”
“Oh no, I remember.” You blushed. “And I don’t regret a word. I meant everything I said.”
“Franco, when we were in the Uber, you said I could use your body as a toy.” You cringed as you repeated his words back to him.
“I know. Offer still stands.”
“Franco…”
“YN, be honest with me. If I was sober, and we were alone, what would you have done?”
You swallowed. He was sober. You were alone.
He saw the thoughts cross your eyes. He broke the space between you walking to the other side of the counter. He pulled you in by the waist until all that separated you was the thin fabric of your pajamas and his underwear.
The breath had been taken from you. “Talk to me,” he said. You couldn’t. The anxiety choked you. “YN, I’m tired of pretending like I don’t want you.”
“Don’t do this to me, Franco,” you pleaded. “I want this but … we shouldn’t.” You looked away. You couldn’t handle the intensity of his gaze
“Why not?”
“Because… we just made up. I don’t want to lose you again.”
“You won’t. I’m here to stay. Trust me. If I promise that everything will be okay, will you trust me?”
You paused. “… I can’t. I don’t trust you. Not yet, at least.”
You had to be honest with him, but it broke your heart to say those words. You didn't know yet if he was genuine, or if his fling with the actress hadn't worked out and he was using you as a placeholder. The thought made you want to puke. 
He loosened his grip on you. Your words felt like a thousand knives going through his chest, but he knew he was going to have to face the very real consequences of his actions. 
“I understand,” he said. “Just let me hold you. I know my words don’t mean much anymore. But I promise I’ll do everything in my power to earn back your trust, and I mean it.”
He buried his face in your hair. “Come back to bed with me.” You knew the request was innocent, so you allowed it, snuggling up into his warm chest and falling asleep as the sun began to peak in the sky outside. “I’m letting go of you. Never again,” he murmured. Both of you knew that it wasn't about the sex, or about how right you felt curled up next to him. It was something deeper, more intimate, than the bare skin that he now innocently wrapped his arm around. 
When you woke up, for a moment, you thought you had dreamed the whole thing. But the soothing sound of Franco’s soft snoring proved you wrong. 
Over breakfast, you laid out boundaries. You both needed to take things slowly, build up the trust that had been lost.
But when you woke up a week later on Valentine’s Day to a bouquet of pink roses on your nightstand, you couldn’t help but blush darker than the petals, remembering the reference from your diary. 
Franco had planned to take you out, and of course, you wore his favorite dress. 
The night was perfect—a little too perfect. In the back of your mind, you couldn’t help remembering the salacious ending to that diary entry, replaying the fantasy over and over in your mind. But as he took you home for the night, Franco was ever the gentleman, perfectly keeping his hands to himself.
The longer you looked at him, the more you wanted him to touch you. 
You had only made it to your apartment for a few seconds when the sight of Franco taking off his suit jacket was too much to bear. You grabbed him by the collar, pulling him into a frantic kiss. 
He wasn’t complaining, of course.
He took your actions as a sign, gently pushing you into the wall behind you until you were pinned. His lips never left yours, instead deepening the connection, tongues exploring each other’s mouths.
When you did come up for air, there was a faint hint of your lipstick on him. He chuckled. “Mi amor, what was that?” he teased, stroking your cheek and he looked down on you. He rested his arm above your head, leaning his body into yours. You could feel both of your chests breathing heavily with a growing desire.
“I wanted you.”
“I thought you wanted to wait?” He was right. You didn’t want to rush into physical things so early. Franco had been nothing but respectful and apologetic all week, but still, only those few days had passed. 
“...Yeah,” you said. You were frustrated at him. For being so fucking attractive. For making you want him so badly.
“It’s alright, hermosa,” he teased, “I’m sorry that I’m so irresistible.” Only a week since you all had made up, and he was already back to reading your thoughts.
“Oh, hush.” 
In the following weeks, Franco’s return to racing made resisting him a lot easier. He had asked you to come to a few races, but you had declined. The memories of his time in F1 were too fresh, the wounds not quite sealed. Besides, you didn’t want to be seen in public with him just yet. You hadn’t exactly made your relationship official—though neither of you were talking to other people—and you were anxious for the public eye to be on you again. 
That was, until Franco got a very exciting phone call. 
Carlos Sainz had gotten in a minor biking accident—nothing major, just a sprained wrist, but enough that he needed to take a week off to heal—so Franco would be back in his car.
When he asked you to return to the F1 paddock with him, this time, you couldn’t refuse. 
So that’s how you found yourself in a hotel room with your best friend (and now sort-of boyfriend). 
Before bed on Wednesday night, after a long day of meetings, he wanted nothing more than to come back to the hotel and lay in your arms. And that’s exactly what he did.
You absentmindedly ran your fingers through his hair. “You nervous for tomorrow?” you asked.
“No,” he answered truthfully, “not one bit.”
“Really?”
“Yes, I mean, I have nothing to lose. Nothing could be worse than the end of last season.”
“Franco, don’t say that.”
“It’s true, though.” He chuckled. “I can’t fuck up any worse than I already did. For a while there, I lost everything.”
You stopped playing with his hair to crane your neck down and kiss the top of his head. “Well, I’m not going anywhere,” you said. 
He sat up, looking you dead in the eyes, his expression as serious as it could get.
“I love you.”
You were taken aback for a moment. You had both said it back in February when you confessed, but it was different now; more real, vulnerable. 
“I love you too.”
“I want you to be mine.” His gaze traced the line from your lips to your eyes, finally meeting you where you couldn’t look away.
“I already am.”
“Then I’m yours, too. And I want the world to know it.”
You finally broke the stare, looking down at the comforter. “I’m nervous about what people will say.”
“YN, who gives a fuck what they say? They’re not here. They don’t know us.” You knew, deep down, that he was right, but that did nothing to temper your anxiety.
Franco playfully grabbed you and pulled you to sit on his lap. You let out a yelp that dissolved into laughter as you saw the smile on his face. 
“I don’t care what anyone says. You’re my girl, yeah?” 
You smiled too. “Yeah.”
“And I'm yours. You wanna prove it?” he teased, pulling down the collar of his shirt, exposing his neck. “Show them all what’s yours, hm?”
“Franco,” you said, blushing, “everyone will see.”
“That’s the point, mi amor.”
“Your manager will kill me if you show up to media day covered in hickeys.”
“I’ll cover them up.” You knew better. He absolutely would not cover them up. He’d wear them like a badge of honor.
But Franco’s refusal to be media trained was one of the many qualities you loved about him.
“Come on, you know you want to,” he teased. He was right. Right now you wanted nothing more than to cover him in love bites, claiming him as yours. 
But you wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of knowing he could read you so well.
“Oh, hush,” you said, grabbing his chin to bring him into another drawn out kiss. 
You trailed the kiss down to his neck, finally giving in to his request. Yes, he was yours. And now the world would see it.
You relentlessly nipped at the rough skin, enjoying the soft but labored breaths that came from Franco. You kissed his earlobes, his jaw, his collarbones, until you found that perfect spot on his neck. He gasped when your teeth met his skin, softly moaning when you gently sunk your teeth in and sucked to leave a bright red mark.
You pulled away, and his expression was one of deep wanting. Sitting on his lap, you could feel him hardening under you, desperate for whatever he could get of you. 
You rested your hands on the hem of his shirt. “This is getting in my way,” you complained.
He wasted no time in taking it off. 
He slid his hands under your shirt too, drawing you closer to him, burying his face in your neck and smothering it with kisses. You gently grinded down on him, giving both of you the friction you so desperately needed.
But you didn’t want to be the focus of the night. You took back control, running your hands through his hair and roughly pulling it, forcing his head back.
His doe eyes on you were full of lust. He paused for a moment.
“Sorry, was that too much?” you whispered, embarrassment beginning to flush your face bright pink.
“Oh no, I..” he panted, “I liked that a lot.”
You smiled, and went right back to your attack on his skin. He ran his hands up and down your back underneath your shirt, teasing with the clasp of your bra.
You felt his phone buzz in his pocket. You both ignored it. 
“YN…” he exhaled, a breathy moan. You pulled back, seeing the red flush on his face. You could feel his excitement beneath you.
“Can I take this off?” he asked, his hands tugging at your top.
You weren’t quite sure what to answer. You figured that you’d sit down and talk before your first time. You all hadn’t gone beyond heavy kissing—Franco had been respectful of your desire to wait. But it had been months now, and he’d gone above and beyond to prove that you could trust him.
His phone buzzed again. And again, you both ignored it.
“You don’t have to if you’re nervous,” he said. “We only go as far as you want.”
You nodded, silently giving him permission. He leaned in to softly press one last kiss to your lips before moving to pull off your top.
Only for his phone to ring, ruining the moment.
Your shirt remained on as he fumbled to get his phone out of his pocket and turn it off. But the caller was James Vowels.
You both saw the contact info and knew that the mood had been ruined.
“I’m sorry, amor, I have to take this—” he apologized as you climbed off of his lap and he answered the call.
As he spoke, you took a deep breath, trying to process what had just happened, and what was about to happen before you had been cockblocked by the William’s team principal. 
After only a minute he hung up the call, continuing to apologize. “I’m so sorry, they need me right now.” His voice was full of urgency. 
“It’s okay, go,” you assured him, your tone genuine. He placed a chaste kiss on your cheek before grabbing a Williams quarter zip from the floor to cover up the darkening marks on his neck. 
He raced down to the hotel conference room, hoping that his…little problem would not be visible in what had sounded like a very important meeting. The tone in James’ voice had been one of immediacy, and Franco had no idea what to expect. 
And when he finally made it to the room, he was met with faces both new and familiar: James, his manager, and…Aston Martin employees?
He made a confused face and he gave the group a cursory nod and sat down in the last remaining seat, next to his manager. 
“Oh, Franco, you’re here,” James said, exhaling. “We have some exciting news.”
His manager had a smile that beamed across the room. “We’ve been talking to these lovely folks from Aston Martin,” she said, gesturing to the other side of the table. “It hasn’t been officially announced yet, but soon they’ll be putting out a statement. Fernando Alonso is retiring.”
Franco gave them a polite smile, unsure of what that information had to do with him.
“So, Aston Martin would like to offer you the seat for 2026.”
Franco felt the air leave his lungs. “I…uh…yes,” he said, too stunned to really speak. “Yes, I want it. Where do I sign?”
“Well, not so fast,” his manager responded. “We have a lot to discuss regarding the new contract, brand deals, buying you out of your Williams contract…”
But Franco was on cloud nine. His manager’s words faded into the background. He felt like heaven had opened up, and the absolute novel of a contract that now sat on the table in front of him was dropped directly there by God Himself. He could even hear the chorus of angels singing. 
His presence there was merely a formality, it seemed, as the Aston Martin officials and his manager talked back and forth on minute details for what felt like hours. Nothing would be set in stone today, of course, but she wasn’t lying when she had said that a mountain of work laid ahead of them. 
As the time droned on, the officials filtered out one by one, leaving only Franco and his manager alone in the conference room.
“I’m so proud of you, kid,” she said, patting him on the shoulder. “You really earned this.”
“Thank you,” he replied, genuine. 
“Look, go back to your room and get some rest. You’ve got a big day tomorrow. But this is strictly confidential, you hear me? You can’t tell a single soul. Not even your own mother. Not even YN.”
“I hear you.”
“And, tomorrow, maybe cover that up better, yeah?” she said, gesturing to her neck. But Franco felt no shame.
“Well, can’t help that you all called at a very inconvenient time.”
His manager grimaced. “I didn’t need to know that. Get some rest,” she laughed, shaking her head. Even she was too happy to truly scold him. 
When he finally returned to the room hours later, you had already fallen asleep waiting for him. He quietly undressed and got in bed, gently brushing your hair out of your face to gaze on your sleeping form.
You were perfect. He had gotten the seat and the girl; what else could a man ask for?
The morning was chaotic. You had both overslept. 
“I’m sorry about last night, amor,” Franco said as you applied concealer to his neck. “It was urgent, and they kept me there for hours.”
“What was it about?” You gently dabbed a makeup sponge across the reddened skin.
“I can’t say. Strictly confidential. But it’s amazing, you’ll see.” He beamed, but you made a face at him. Smiling flexed his neck muscles and made it harder to cover up the evidence of your intimacy.
At the paddock, it was chaos as usual. It was the return of the Franco Colapinto—now triumphant, having had a solid season in F2 so far—and this time, he walked in with you on his arm. 
The only problem was that Franco kept tugging at the neckline of his quarter zip, and the friction was causing the hastily applied makeup from the morning to smudge, revealing the marks beneath.
Thankfully, no reporters said anything. But the fans online certainly were.
Steamy! Franco Colapinto arrives today at the paddock with suspected girlfriend YN in tow, and the driver appears to have several red marks on his neck. YN and Franco have not confirmed any relationship other than being friends, and this is the first race she has attended since Brazil 2024.
COMMENT: Franco showing up to the paddock absolutely covered in hickeys was not on my 2025 bingo card
COMMENT: Okay but that is so on brand for him. This man simply does not give a fuck and I love it.
You chuckled to yourself as you read the comment. But you tensed up as you felt Franco’s manager walk up next to you. You were already anticipating the earful she’d give you.
“He’s a natural at this, ain’t he?” she asked, more a statement than a question. In the distance, Franco was making a reporter laugh.
“Yeah,” you said. Franco’s manager always made you nervous, for some reason. 
“I’m so proud of him.”
“Me too.” You paused, unsure of whether to broach the subject. “You’re…unusually chipper today.”
His manager laughed. “Yeah, I guess so. But even I have to relax sometimes. I mean, he’s doing a great job.”
“I heard there was some exciting news. Franco wouldn’t tell me what, though.”
His manager’s casual smile now stretched from ear to ear. “Oh yeah, big stuff. But top secret.”
“I can’t wait to hear.”
Media day went smooth as butter. Practice 1 and 2 went perfect. With the arrival of Carlos Sainz, the Williams car had vastly improved, and Franco drove like an expert.
Such was evident by his P8 finish in qualifying the next day; his highest ever qualifying in F1. 
Since your night had been interrupted the day before, your wanting of him hadn’t lessened; in fact, it had grown stronger ever since you realized how you truly were ready. But quali day had taken it out of him, and you knew he needed to rest before the Grand Prix tomorrow.
And on that next day, as you watched him climb in the car from the Williams garage, you hoped that he’d put that rest to good use. You said a prayer for his safety even more than his success.
You held your breath through each lap, silently cheering him on through the knots of nervousness in your stomach. But it seems like your prayer was working; he was gaining places, P8 to P5 only a fourth of the way into the race. 
He boxed halfway, and your eyes traced the lines of his car and helmet as he pulled into eyeshot of you and sped away in only a few seconds. He wasn’t looking at you, of course, but it didn’t matter. Your heart felt like it would burst with love.
At first, you didn’t even notice the cameras capturing your sentimental expression. That was, until you glanced away from his car in the distance and looked toward the screen. You were shocked to see your own reflection, captioned with your job title and ‘Franco Colapinto’s partner.’
He really was yours, now. You smiled at the camera and waved before it cut away to the action. Franco just kept gaining. He had dropped a few places after boxing, but made up for it in no time. P4.
You could hear the commentators through your headphones.
“And really, Franco Colapinto is stunning us all here. As we all remember, he had a rather disappointing end to the 2024 F1 season, but he seems to have come back with a vengeance. A podium is a real possibility for him today.”
Your smile couldn’t be contained. He was going to do this. You knew it. 
With only five laps left, he overtook for P3. The garage cheered. You cheered with them. But it wasn’t over yet. It was a tense, wheel to wheel battle. Your heart was beating out of your chest.
He was able to inch just slightly enough ahead to cinch the spot as he crossed the checkered flag.
The William’s garage erupted in applause.
You ran to meet him as he pulled up the car, catching him when he jumped into the arms of the crowd of William’s employees. He nearly ripped off his helmet and balaclava, grabbed your jaw and brought you into a rough kiss.
You broke with a smile. “I love you, I’m so proud of you!” you said, unsure if he could even hear you in the chaos.
“Te amo, YN,” he said, tears of happiness clouding the edges of his vision. He continued speaking in Spanish, but you couldn’t make out what he was saying over the crowd. He had to break the embrace to go to the podium.
As he stood up there, you beamed with pride below. He really had made it.  
After the podium, you hid away in his driver’s room, waiting for all his media obligations to be over so you could go back to the hotel together. To pass the time, you scrolled. The internet was losing their mind over your hard launch.
And even better, people had already uploaded videos of you and Franco exchanging words of love at the barriers. His words were difficult to make out, but a few dedicated lip readers had attempted to decipher the message. But there was no internet consensus just yet.
You made a mental note to ask Franco what he had said later, but for now, you were sure he was exhausted.  
Your assumption was proven correct as he walked into his driver’s room, rolling his shoulders and sighing. But upon seeing you, his face lit up. You greeted him with more hugs and words of praise.
As you both stood there, holding each other, it was like the world around you melted away. 
“YN, can I tell you something?” he muttered into your hair, hand snaked around your upper back.
“Anything,” you answered, your face pressed into his chest.
“I’m not supposed to tell anyone. You can’t let my manager know that I told you.”
You hummed in response, but he broke the hug to look at you, indicating the seriousness of his statement to come.
“I got a contract for 2026.”
Your eyes went as wide as dinner plates. You were speechless.
“Franco… that’s, oh my God, that’s amazing!” You thought you were going to burst with love for him.
“Nothing is set in stone yet,” he explained, “but she’s been negotiating the contract, and they’ll probably announce it in a few weeks.”
You reached your fingers up to run them through his curls. “You’re incredible.” He blushed.
“I think we should go back to the hotel and celebrate, hm?” he teased.
“You don’t want to go out?”
“We can if you want,” he mused, pressing a soft kiss to your cheek, “but I think the world has seen enough of us today, yeah?”
So you celebrated in your hotel room alone. The bottle of champagne that decorated the desk of the room was left untouched—but you sure as hell weren’t. 
The podium had emboldened him. He explored the curves of your body over your clothes with reckless abandon. You wordlessly helped him remove his shirt, trailing your eyes of the muscles that were sure to be sore in a few hours. You traced the marks you had left the other day, now beginning to fade.
“My turn,” he joked, bringing his lips to your neck to give you your fair share of love bites. He brought one hand to gently hold your neck, while the other inched further and further up your shirt, teasing the edge of your bra. You felt like you could drown in his touch. You closed your eyes and fell deep into bliss. 
“YN,” he whispered, “are you sure you want to do this? Are we ready?”
You swallowed, nervous. “Yes.”
But he could sense your anxiety, and was hesitant to continue. He pulled back, raking his eyes up and down your form. You couldn’t help your nervousness. But having read your darkest fantasies, he knew what you really wanted. 
“You know, the reason I read your diary is because I knew there was something about you that you try so desperately to hide,” he said, his voice soft and smooth as honey. “I wanted to know whatever part of you that you try to hide away from the rest of the world,” he let his hands trace down the length of your arm, and leaned in closer to whisper in your ear, “and that part of you is that you’re a needy girl who’s desperate to get fucked.” 
A shiver ran down your spine at the vulgarity of his words, a side to him you’d never seen.
He brought his hand from your arm to your neck, gently tracing the curve towards your chin. “And there’s nothing wrong with that, of course.” 
His voice was soft and tender, but when his hand grabbed your chin and forced you to face him, his expression was anything but. “You just needed a man who can fuck you like the desperate girl you are.” Your eyes widened at his words, and you could feel the warmth rush to your cheeks in a rosy blush. 
His eyes met yours. “Just say the word, mi amor. Do you trust me? Will you let me fuck you like you want… no, like you need to be fucked so badly? I can do it. I’m not afraid. I want to give you everything you’ve ever dreamed of…” His voice trailed off as he turned his head and closed the gap between you, placing his lips right below your ear. The kiss was soft and made you release your breath. “Say it, YN. Tell me you want this as bad as I do.” 
“You really want this?” you said, your voice almost trembling with anticipation.
His lips near your ear were going to be the death of you. “Of course. Can’t you feel how badly I do?” he whispered. You could feel him beneath you, hardening with every second that went past. You imagined the feeling of grinding your hips down on his length, recalling the memories of only a few days before. 
Oh God, how badly you wanted to. You wanted to give him everything. You could feel his soft breath on your neck, his hands now resting on your waist, tentatively waiting for your permission to resume roaming the curves of your body. But your breath was caught in your throat.
“Franco…” The soft exhalation of his name was all you can muster. “What, amor?” he replied. You swallowed and closed your eyes, knowing your next word would let the floodgates of your desire open.
“Please.”
His lips met your neck in a kiss that was tentative at first, like you were something fragile that could be broken by his touch. But the feeling of his soft lips finally meeting your skin caused you to draw in a breath. 
“You want to take the lead, or should I?” he asked. 
“You,” you answered simply, too distracted by the absolutely heavenly feeling of his velvet lips on your neck.
He hummed in response. “If you ever want to stop, just tell me, okay?”
“I will.”
He placed one final kiss on your neck and helped you take off your top. You felt his eyes undressing you more than his hands.
He wordlessly turned you around to sit on his lap, your back against his chest. His hands traced lower and lower down your stomach until they met the lacy waistband of your shorts.
“Are you going to be a good girl and take these off for me?” he purred. 
“Why would I do that, when I have you to do it for me?” You could tease him right back. He let out a dark laugh, kissing your neck from behind. 
“Little brat…” he cooed, but you took no offense. He slid your shorts off, and you were left with only your bra and panties. He ran his hands up and down your now exposed stomach. His touch was warm and inviting as it traced down to the now wet fabric of your panties. 
He began slowly, just tracing the skin through the fabric, inching lower and lower. He could already feel how wet you were. “Doesn’t take that much to get you going, hm? So wet just from my words.”
You blushed in embarrassment at his teasing. “Shut up…”
“Oh, amor,” he kissed your cheek, your face now turning away from him. “It’s okay. I know how badly you needed this.”
You let out a breathy moan as he began to outline your pussy with the feather-light touch of his fingers. He tentatively dipped his fingers under the fabric, spreading them around your growing wetness as he circled your clit.
Slowly and carefully, he put a finger inside you curling it up to hit that sweet spot. With his other hand, he roughly groped at your chest. He unclasped your bra with one hand, tossing it across the room, and let his free hand paw at your chest and circle your nipple.
“See, bébé, what a reward you get when you use your words and tell me what you want?”
“Yes,” you moaned, breathy and full of desire.
“And what do you want?” he asked.
“I want… you.” The words stuck in your throat, your mind too preoccupied with the pleasure of his thumb swirling softly around your clit and the two fingers now pumping in and out of you. You were vulnerable, at his mercy, but you trusted him. 
“You want me to…?”
“I want you to… to fuck me.”
“Good girls get what they want. You’ve been so good for me, haven’t you? Can you do one more thing for me?” He smirked, removing his hand from your sensitive bundle of nerves. You already missed the friction. 
“Yes, anything,” you promised. 
“Get on your knees for me.”
You obeyed. The sight of you on your knees below him, gazing at home longingly with your big doe eyes, made his cock twitch. But he saw something beyond obedience in your face.
He knelt down next to you. “Are you still nervous?” he asked.
You laughed. “I’m always nervous.” 
He brushed your hair out of your face, removing all the barriers between the two of you. “Do you want to stop?”
“No. I’m just… not as experienced as you. What if I'm not good?”
“You’ve already been so good for me,” he said, cradling your face in his hands. “I’ll guide you.”
You watched him with your innocent eyes as he stood up, unbuckled his belt, and took off his pants. You dug your knees into the pillow beneath you as he shed his last remaining layer of clothing.
He had no right to tease you for being so wet, when his own arousal coated him. His cock was dripping precum, so hard that it nearly hurt.
“Open your mouth,” he instructed, and again, you obeyed. He gently led you to him as you pressed your tongue to the bottom of his length and licked up to the sensitive head.
He moaned. “I don’t think you need any help, do you?” You just hummed as your tongue traced the lines of his veins up and down his shaft, before you took as much of him as you could, closing your mouth to trap him in the warmth.
He grabbed your hair to gently guide you to a good rhythm. You looked at him in admiration, but his head was thrown back, eyes closed in bliss. 
He moved your head faster, and you gagged a bit at his cock filling your mouth. You dug your hands into his thighs. Franco cursed in Spanish under his breath.
Soon, he pulled you away. You were embarrassed. Did you do something wrong?
“God, you feel too good. I can’t finish yet. I want to take my time with you.” He led you back to the bed, finally taking time to gaze at your form laid bare before him.
For a moment, he was silent, just taking in the sight of you. “You’re beautiful, YN.”
You blushed. “You don’t need to flatter me, you already got in my pants,” you joked.
“It’s not flattery,” he replied as he crossed the room to grab a condom from his bag and put it on, “it’s true.”
He returned to the bed, climbing on top of you. “You’re perfect. Every part of you.”
The vulnerable praise made you uncomfortable. “Franco…” 
“Touch me, amor.” You obeyed, bringing your hands to his broad shoulder, bracing for what you knew would come next.
“You may not think you’re beautiful, but I do. And I’ll make love to you as many times as I need to until you believe it.”
You blushed and brought your hands to your face. You were not immune to his Argentine charm. He gently pulled your hands away, kissing your wrists, so he could see your face. 
As he guided himself to your entrance, he slowly and carefully slid inside you with a deep groan. His eyes rolled back into his head at the heavenly feeling of your pussy, and your breath hitched.
He stopped to give you a moment to adjust to his length. You felt filled and warm; all his. 
For a moment he just stayed there, still, looking down at the sight of you stuffed with his cock, ready to be ravished.
“You alright?” he asked, softly tracing circles along your hips with his hands. You nodded through the sweet burn of being stretched on him.
But he could feel the tension in you. “Just relax, YN,” he cooed at you. “I’m going to take good care of you, hm?” 
He leaned down to place a gentle kiss on your forehead and you whined. He whispered something in Spanish, too fast and incoherent for you to understand, but with a soft enough tone to recognize the love behind the gesture.
His thrusts at first were slow and shallow, giving you time to adjust. As he gently fucked you, he leaned down to softly whisper sweet nothings into your ears. You felt safe in his arms. 
But soon the softness faded away into lust. You both wanted it, and you showing him by how you sang a chorus of noises the faster he fucked you. His rough thrusts brought forth sinful noises from the both of you, lost in your pleasure. “It’s okay, YN. I know how badly you needed this,” he cooed, his own breath strained. “And I needed it too. I needed to feel you wrapped around me. You feel so fucking good, so tight and wet.”
His words weren’t lost on you. “Fuck, Franco…” you begged between his thrusts. You dug your nails into his back as he continued his unrelenting pace.
“Talk to me, pretty girl,” he said, slowing down for a moment. “You okay? Is it good?”
“So good,” you responded. “Don’t stop.”
He wordlessly continued, pumping his full length into you with reckless abandon. You were sure that your nails in his back would draw blood with how roughly you clung to him.
All you could do was take it, all of him, and let the moans and gasps fall from your lips with every touch.
As he sped up, his tone changed, becoming something rougher. He was clearly emboldened by the noises that left your mouth with every movement.
“I love hearing your pretty little noises. I want you to scream for me. Fucking scream my name,” he commanded. You didn’t have the strength in you, too distracted by how good he felt, burying his cock in you. 
“F- Franco,” you gasped. He pulled back so you could see him and grabbed your chin, forcing you to look him directly in the eyes.
“What’s that, love? Did you say something, or am I fucking you too good that you can’t even speak properly?”
“Franco, I—” you were cut off by your own whine, “I’m gonna cum.”
“Oh, pretty girl,” he cooed at you, “let go. Cum for me.”
You wanted nothing more than to obey him, and you came closer to the edge hearing his command. 
“I want you to look at me when I make you cum,” he instructed. You nodded at him.
But he slowed his pace down to a torturously slow speed, savoring how every inch of him went in and out of your drenched pussy. 
Even with his switch, you could feel that knot in your stomach tightening, threatening to explode as you held his intense gaze. Any self consciousness you would have had was cast aside by your desperate need to obey him.
And when he moved his hand from your hips down to your sensitive clit and began to rub, you couldn’t help but follow his command, climaxing in his arms.
He held you as you let the waves of pleasure come over you, not letting up his soft assault on your bundle of nerves. Even as you began to buck your hips involuntarily from the sensitive touch, he just whispered, “It’s okay, mi amor. I’m here. I’ve got you.”
He softly shushed your whimpers of pleasure, gently running his free hand up and down your curves. “Are you okay to keep going? Because you know I’m not done with you yet.”
You didn’t know if you could handle any more, but you sure as hell weren’t going to tell him to stop. You’d waited too long for this, wanted it too badly, to go back now.
You nodded, so he kept going, hitting every spot inside you just right, causing you to throw your head back in pleasure. He was careful not to overwhelm you, taking an even and steady pace, but neither of you could help so heavenly it felt to have him inside of you.
Franco chased his own release, sitting up so he could see your whole body as he fucked you. He held onto your hips hard enough to leave marks, but you’d gladly wear them with pride. 
It didn’t take long for him to pull out and rip off the condom, pumping his hand up and down his length. 
“YN, I’m so fucking close,” he moaned. “Where—”
You didn’t answer him, just leaning down to take him in your mouth. He grabbed the back of your head, roughly pushing you closer to him.
“Don’t stop, you’re gonna make me cum, don’t—” 
He couldn’t finish his sentence before he climaxed, filling your mouth and letting out a low and low groan.
You pulled away from him and swallowed the stickiness that coated your mouth. 
He collapsed on the bed next to you. “Fuck, YN.” You laid down next to him. “That was so good.” His chest was still heaving with the intensity of his orgasm. 
But as he turned to you, the lust left him, growing into something softer as he brushed your hair out of your face. You were both covered in a thin sheen of sweat.
“You okay?” he asked.
You hummed and nodded, closing your eyes and leaning into him, taking in the smell of sex and his cologne. You couldn’t get close enough to him.
He kissed the top of your head. “I’ve got you,” he assured. You were too overwhelmed to say anything. He just held you. 
Eventually, you both got up to take a shower before you both got ready for bed. Snuggled close to him, you felt the quiet warmth of his presence protecting you, and it lulled you to sleep quicker than anything else ever could.
When you woke up in the middle of the night, you checked your phone. The internet sleuths had finally deciphered what Franco had said to you—a heartachingly sweet confession of love. He had said you were his life, his everything. He couldn’t have done it without you. 
Within the thin crack of light from blinds and the streetlights outside, you could see Franco’s backpack, with your diary still in it. If you wanted to, you could have stolen it back. But instead, you left it be, snuggling deeper into the bed to get close to the man you loved who slept peacefully beside you. 
It was true that more work needed to be done until you all could fully communicate with no difficulties—no language barriers, no journals, just heartfelt words. But you knew you both could do it. You loved each other too much to not. 
So you smiled as you felt his arm sleepily wrap around you and pull you close. You were safe. You were home. 
372 notes · View notes
piastri-fvx · 5 days ago
Text
Love hate. Lando Norris.
Pairing: Lando Norris x f1driver!ferraridriver!reader, smau, one-sided enemies to lovers (inspired by Na Na Na by One Direction)
Summary: When she doesn't like him and he's in love with her.
Word Count:
Face claim: Sabrina Carpenter and girls from pinterestttt!!
Disclaimer/s: None!! Just fluff and bickering/teasing
A/N: i basically had no time to write anything because i had a lotttt to do!! anyways, i hope u enjoy!! lmk if u have requests or want to be on my permanent tag list <333 also i wrote this before lando changed his instagram @ so i had to go back and change emmmm!!
♡ Masterlist ♡
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@yourusername
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liked by lando, alexandrasaintmleux, ferrari, charles_leclerc, maxfewtrell and 2.484.916 others
yourusername starting the 2025 season like thisssss
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user1 every model should thank y/n for choosing this career path, they wouldn't stand a chance against her 🙏
user2 THE QUEEN IS BACK YALL
-> user3 manifesting another y/n season
charles_leclerc favorite teammate 😁 liked by author
-> yourusername tyyyy!! you're my favorite too
-> user4 oh to be friends with y/n or charles
oscarpiastri good luck on the first race! liked by author
ferrari our girl ❤️🫶 liked by author
-> yourusername forza ferrari sempre!!
-> user5 y/n was meant to be a ferrari driver, no one can convince me otherwise
-> user6 real, if you don't agree, argue with the wall
alexandrasaintmleux 🥰🥰🥰 liked by author
-> yourusername 🫶🫶🫶
-> user7 y/n basically being charles's sister atp 🛐
-> user8 and alex's sister lmao
-> user9 y/n leclerc from now on 🙏
user10 SHE IS GLOWINGGGG
user11 pookie is backkkk!!
-> user12 y/n we need all of the tea
-> user13 real, how was break, y/n?
lando 😍
-> yourusername no.
-> user14 humbled him real fast 😭
-> user15 is he just silent or was he silenced 🛐
-> user16 lando got gagged lol
@lando
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liked by yourusername, oscarpiastri, mclaren, maxfewtrell, joaofelix79 and 3.483.294 others
lando new year, new @ 😁
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oscarpiastri 👍 liked by author
-> user1 typical Oscar behaviour
-> user2 fr the response is soooo oscar
user3 should've been landgoat yk 😝
user4 just a chill guy
-> user5 just a chill guy named lando
-> user6 who drives cars in weird shaped circles for a living
-> user7 and has no rizz (iykyk)
mclarenauto short and sweet. We love it 🧡 liked by author
-> user8 okay sabrina carpenter.
user9 still our goat 🤪🎀
user10 i'm sorry, the old lando can't come to the phone right now ✨
-> taylorswift 😙
user11 y/n being in his likes tho...
-> user12 real, because what about lando's lack of rizz?
@yourusername
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liked by lando, oscarpiastri, lilymhe, flavy.barla, jade_distinguinn and 5.385.495 others
yourusername sooooo happy with p1!! congrats to osc on p2, well deserved
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lando what about my p3???
-> yourusername go oscar!!!
-> oscarpiastri go mclaren
-> lando go lando!! 😁
-> yourusername ...
oscarpiastri thanks mate liked by author
-> yourusername you're welcomeeee, osc
-> user1 😁😁😁
user2 cutieeeeee 🫶🫶🫶
user3 i think i'm lesbian now 😍
-> user4 *bi, lando norris exists
-> user5 omg right
user6 oh how i love y/n photo dumps
-> user7 her aesthetic is literally what i wanh mine to be like
lilymhe angel 🫶💗 liked by author
-> yourusername getting ready to get down on one knee right now ☺️
-> user8 lando, alex????
-> user9 y/n is stealing albono's girl 😭
user10 beautifullll 🤍
user11 queen of pinteresty photos liked by author
user12 girly we miss you on tiktok
-> user13 real, i miss y/n's influencer era
-> user14 yeah!! come back, y/n
user15 i wanna eat these pics liked by author
lando i agree with @user15
-> yourusername respectfully, get out of my comments
-> lando awwwwww 😫
-> user16 lando got rejected
-> user17 AGAIN
@lando
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liked by olliebearman, oscarpiastri, charles_leclerc, maxfewtrell, flavy.barla and 3.399.492 others
lando she lost a bet
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yourusername i don't support this
-> lando why didn't you at least like the post, baby 😩
-> user1 BABY??????
-> user2 SCREENSHOT SCREENSHOT
-> user3 I'M FRAMING THIS ON MY WALL WTF
user4 CAN WE TALK ABOUT LANDO CALLING HER BABY?????
-> user5 REAL BECAUSE IS THAT A HARD LAUNCH
user6 can we talk about how STUNNING she looks?
-> user7 real!! like damnnnn
user8 why is she so prettyyyyy 😭
oscarpiastri lol
-> yourusername 🙄
-> user9 oscar is having so much fun with this lmao
user10 lando entering his aesthetic arc???
user11 y/n pookie is such a good influence on lando
-> user12 especially on his insta feed
-> user13 "thank you y/n" we all chant in unison 🛐🛐🛐
user14 y/n looking like a goddess as always 😫
-> lando yeah she does that 😣
-> user15 LANDO WDYM
user16 guys i think lando's trying to tell us something
user17 lando trying to hard launch and y/n refusing 😫
-> user18 it's giving mixed signals
@yourusername
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liked by lando, oscarpiastri, mclaren, scuderiaferrari, alexandrasaintmleux and 10.382.283 others
yourusername hard launch or whatever
tagged: @lando
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user1 favorite enemies to lovers 🛐🛐🛐
oscarpiastri finally liked by author
-> user2 OSCAR 😭
user3 so invested in this
-> user4 same
-> user5 finally something interesting lmao
user6 i smell something
-> user7 a love story 🥰
user8 lethal face cards belong together
-> user9 real
-> user10 the proof is literally RIGHT HERE
user11 this post just validated everything we've been praying for. thank you for your service liked by author
-> yourusername you're welcome, darling 💗
-> user12 i would faint if she called me darling
-> user13 @user11 got so lucky wtf
user14 i guess being a ferrari fan, this is the only win we can get
-> user15 #depressedemo
-> user16 there is not one ferrari fan that is mentally stable
-> user17 can't even protest tbh
-> charles_leclerc me neither
user18 lando, please give me y/n
-> lando never.
-> user19 mama a lando behind you
user20 we may call ourselves lando fans, but we are really just y/n fans liked by author
@lando
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liked by yourusername, mclaren, oscarpiastri, alexandrasaintmleux, f1 and 6.484.185 others
lando MY WOMAN 😍😍😍
| view all comments...
user1 do you guys perhaps need a dog?
-> user2 i can bark
-> user3 woof woof woof
user4 meow meow meow
user5 sometimes babygirl is lando norris
-> user6 sometimes babygirl is a 24 year old man
-> user7 who drives cars for a living
-> user8 and has a stunning gf
user9 i'm only here for the y/n pictures
-> user10 same it's what we deserve
user11 lando i only follow you for the y/n pictures, more content please
-> lando as you wish
-> user12 YAYYYYYYY
user13 my day just got brighter after seeing this GORGEOUS WOMAN
user14 lando can you fight?
-> user15 i guess lando has to fight now
-> user16 he can't take all of us at once
user17 they look so cute 💗
-> user18 y/n is stunning and so is lando 😭
-> user19 no but they are
------------------------------------------------------
A/N: i'm soooo tired but wanted to get this out of my drafts lollll!! feel free to request and please comment (if u want), i would love to get some feedback, lmao! love u all and hope u enjoyed this
tags!
@freyathehuntress
274 notes · View notes
blood-starved-beast · 3 months ago
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Rare Reddit W actually
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I saw some people on TikTok and on the main sub talking about how it is "crazy for Cait and Vi to hook up in the jail cell" and how "Vi should be going after her sister" so I wanna make sure we all understand the convo beforehand and why it makes sense that it would lead to sex lmao
We find Vi in this scene metaphorically (and literally, in a jail cell) where she was in act 2 of season 1: alone, feeling like she has lost all her family, and still feeling like she failed her sister, which is where Caitlyn and her first met. Given the wishy-washy terms that were left on during their last scene together, Vi is prepared for Caitlyn to tell her "I told you so", which Vi verbally expresses to Cait. But, Caitlyn does not tell her that, she tells her that she is the one who made it so Vi could free Jinx by moving the guards since she knows Vi well enough that obviously Vi was gonna go to her sister.
Vi reacts to this so passionately for two reasons: One, she is no longer alone. Caitlyn is saying "I'm still on your side" and more importantly "I've moved on, my love for you is stronger than my hate for your sister", which prompts such an enthusiastic response from Vi. Two, Vi is lifted of one of the biggest burdens she has dealt with during the series, which is the unique love triangle between Vi, Jinx, and Caitlyn. Vi no longer feels like she has to choose between them. Jinx verbally tells Vi "you should be with her" and Caitlyn admits to facilitating Jinx's release.
So naturally, Vi stops holding herself back, it's why she doesn't give a fuck when Caitlyn admits to sleeping with Maddie. Vi indulges herself and her desires for the first time in the series, no longer burdened by this internal conflict. Like, no wonder Vi was "feeling fantastic"...
Also, on the topic of "Vi should be going after her sister", the show establishes Vi as someone who does not go after people who leave her. Vi is someone who lives for others, and so she respects their decisions even if they hurt her. She is not someone who goes where she feels she is not wanted. Vi didn't go back to Caitlyn after episode 3 of season 2, she's not gonna go after Jinx either, it's who Vi is.
Text form. Written by Level-Ad7232 on reddit
Ok now I'm a bit more ok with Vi's arc in s2 but still. Would've been nice for more for Vi I think. She really out here with the most subtle arc.
310 notes · View notes
sex-tech · 3 months ago
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This is gonna probably be a really long post about my thoughts for Act 3 with what has been set up already because I need to shout into the void about this shit LMAO get ready for a WALL of text
Also a fair warning, I'm gonna be talking about so much jayvik/vikjayce in this you don't understand THE HELL I AM GOING THROUGH THERE IS GONNA BE SO MUCH COPIUM IN THIS
SPOILERS AHEAD FOR SEASON 2 !!!
Quick mini-review: I feel like a contrarian when I say that I actually preferred Act 2 to Act 1. There were a lot of things set up and a lot of payoffs. I do have issues with the pacing overall; season 1 had much better structure and with the introduction of so much LOL lore in season 2, there are bound to be issues. There were 6 years of production for season 1 vs. 3 years of production for season 2, and it has clearly had an effect on the writing. Some scenes are too quick, some scenes are too slow, some cuts are too abrupt - I feel this is painfully obvious sometimes and talking with my friends about it we all agree that the pacing has suffered immensely.
But other than that, Act 2 has been really playing with my emotions and there are so many moments where I just kept breaking down over the scenes with Jinx, Vi, Vander and Isha. The watercolour-style flashbacks were so incredibly well done and those scenes had a lot of love put into them - props to Studio Fortiche!
I believe there is definitely a time paradox happening of some kind, one where Jayce, Ekko and Heimerdinger are lost in some kind of timeline.
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This reflection in this artwork feels like it's hinting at what we will see in Act 3, maybe a different timeline, or the future, and Jayce will end up seeing the outcome of the Arcane. I feel that with how the lore is being changed, they need to give him some purpose or reason to pursue Viktor, to officially make them enemies. Whatever Jayce will see or experience will lead to that - a difference in perspectives and ideals.
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Also, this shot, where Jayce returns and we see him glitching in and out, I feel that's a really clear depiction of a paradox, of different timelines converging or something similar. I can just imagine him living through all these different events, surviving something so awful, and now it's destroying him from the inside. He's so traumatized and I will defend him with my whole being.
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I'm also a bit worried now about Ekko and Heimerdinger. I'm convinced that the latter won't survive however I'm not so sure about Ekko. I feel that everything being a time paradox would lead really well into him finally receiving his time powers, but as of now I think he is really under-utilized in the series as a whole, more so in season 2, and I'm really hopeful that we will get more screen time with him in Act 3.
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Singed's role in this season is huge and it will definitely become even more important in Act 3. The introduction of Orianna, which I thought was so great, as well as the name-drop of "Dr. Reveck" has really set up his motivations. Warwick being his experiment for bringing back his daughter I believe will lead to him experimenting with Viktor.
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Warwick's design was confusing to me at first. He felt too human but I think that was intentional - Singed wanted to create him with some humanity, a test, hence he is still more like Vander, still able to feel his love for Jinx and Vi. I believe he will survive, and Singed will get rid of his humanity completely, potentially leading to a more LOL accurate look.
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This also brings me to Viktor and his OG lore. I really liked his concept in the game and I will admit, seeing them change it in Arcane worried me. While I really love the design, I was hopeful that we would see Viktor entering his glorious evolution era. But now with his interactions with Singed, with Singed's personal motivation for revival, I believe that there is still hope. Seeing how Orianna is preserved, still human-like, I believe that Singed's discoveries will lead him to recreating Viktor with metal, something closer to what we see in the game, maybe a cursed combination of both Arcane and machine, and I believe he will see it as a breakthrough in bringing Orianna back.
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The way he describes it, the way he says, "You must survive, Viktor," a parallel to him saying "the specimen must survive" feels so intentional. He sees the potential in reanimation with how Viktor returned, healed, and this won't be the end of him, not yet, he must survive.
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This scene where Viktor asks Singed, "Do you believe in fate?" I believe also points to another thing. Viktor knew very early on what his fate would be. He was accepting of it, he was confused as to why he was alive, and I believe in the scene where Jayce kills him, that look in his eyes was of acceptance. He did not look afraid, he looked at peace - with the idea of different timelines, with Viktor becoming closer to the celestial, he might've already known what would happen, which is why he invites Jayce to meet him. That with him saying, "I've been expecting you, doctor," is another reason I think that Viktor is aware of everything.
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With Singed's final words to Viktor, the disdain in Viktor's eyes, the way Sky is looking at Viktor directly, frantic, worried, an expression of dread at the thought of the Arcane dying out completely, of all the progress coming to an end. I still believe the core is manipulating Viktor, that Sky is the personification of it, and that the core is aware of its own evolution reaching its final state, death - like a virus without a host.
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And then there was this, the heavy breathing, the gritted teeth, squint in his eyes, the way he drops down - it felt like heartbreak, like guilt. He just murdererd a man, a man that spoke to him as Viktor.
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Just this look. He's tired. He's returned from hell and he can see the beginning of the end, he can see Viktor's descent into madness, recognizes it immediately, and he's disappointed. Maybe he'd hoped to see something else.
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Also, with Jayce saying, "I thought you were done with Hextech, and me," could imply that this new version of Viktor, remade by Singed, would no longer have a connection the Arcane - he is reforged, he has realized the weakness of flesh and compassion, "it's inescapable," and he will be remade with steel and rage, once again against his will, just like Warwick was. And perhaps, in this dark future, when Jayce finally sees what Viktor becomes, sees Viktor reject him entirely, that he is done with him, is also what makes Jayce spiral.
And now that he has returned, seeing Viktor welcome him with open arms, inviting him to spend time together, to show him what he has uncovered - what must he have seen? What must Viktor have said to him to make him feel so denied and unwanted?
Someone he once loved, someone that broke him, showing him the same gentleness and care he had once before.
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"I won't fail. I swear it."
This entire sequence was insane. The different emotions in Jayce's face, the way he's cycling through pain and fear and conviction. The initial shock in his eyes, seeing what his Viktor has become, seeing him in this state, before the corruption - he looks vulnerable, he doesn't fight back, doesn't resist. He has made his promise to Viktor before, and I believe this is another promise to him, a promise to rend his mistake and do right by him. And Jayce looks frightened by his actions, frightened by the sight before him - Viktor looks so exhausted, so sick - I can imagine it reminds Jayce of him before he combined with the Hexcore.
Jayce's entire arc this season is about him gaining more agency, more control of himself despite the way he has been spiraling, whilst for Viktor it's the opposite, he has lost himself to a greater purpose, a perfect mirror to how they were in season 1.
The way their designs mirror them both too, Jayce getting the leg brace, his eyes changing, him being afflicted with the Arcane, Viktor keeping the blanket, keeping a cog that reminds him of the discoveries they made together, one side of it being perfectly clear, the other corrupted, a representation of them - two sides of the same coin.
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I believe Viktor's monologue at the end, the scenes with him and Sky in a magical world where he is emoting, showing compassion for those that suffer, his realization that emotion is inescapable, shows that he still feels, even if it is all subdued. His reaction to Jayce killing Salo hurt, he looked pained and yet, as though he expected it - "that isn't Jayce" - it's not his Jayce, not the Jayce that he remembers, the one that he stayed with over shared affections, this is a Jayce ruined by him, and he is yet to see just how much they have and will hurt each other.
Maybe the exquisite chaos he is talking about is his corruption from the future, constantly self-replicating and self-annihilating, something that he has never observed before because it is yet to happen to him. He knows his fate, but not anything beyond that.
A couple final notes:
All the butterfly imagery - Jayce's hammer, the explosion in the mesh(?), the "Talis" butterfly - a symbol of death, rebirth, transformation
The parallels between Jayce and Singed, wanting to keep Viktor alive, creating a monster, and now Jayce having to destroy that which he created, a consequence of him breaking his promise
Viktor appearing as though he is connected to both the void and something celestial, godly, a balance
TLDR; jayvik divorce era will be the death of me, they were made for each other and will be the death of each other
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peachhcs · 10 months ago
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losing the championships
hughes!sister x will smith au (samy + will)
will's self-doubt creeps in after losing the finals making him snap at the one person who's always there for him, almost making her turn her back on him.
2.6k words
warnings: a bit of angst, arguing, crying, this is a sad post in general
ik im feeding y’all rn but i feel weird putting this out in two days and not now haha, but guys you know i had to do it. i had to get the angst out. i think this is like the first angsty post in the series?? i hate when there is angst, but i love writing it lmao. i'm not sure how accurate some of this is, but i hope the trio stays on for another season!! i'd actually be devestated if they don't. anyways keep requesting!! <3
au masterlist
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it didn’t feel real. nothing felt real watching her best friends crumple to the ice in utter defeat and heartbreak just two days after winning the semifinals. samy stood up in the stands nearly motionless while everything around her fell silent. she didn’t think those moments were actually real whenever they played in movies, but here she was hardly focusing on anything but her best friends in tears. 
her eyes couldn’t leave ryan on his knees with his face in the ice. she just wanted to wrap all of them into her arms so none of them would feel this type of pain anymore. 
the stupid jumbotron panned to everyone’s reactions, basically putting the boys on full blast when they most definitely didn’t want anyone to see them crying like they were. samy’s heart only broke further when she finally looked down at her boyfriend trying to hold himself together while comforting a sobbing ryan and teary gabe. 
her own eyes grew teary seeing those three so destroyed not knowing what was next for any of them. that was probably the scariest part. 
when will searched for samy’s gaze the waterworks broke like a dam for the couple. the youngest hughes was completely crying and will’s shame settled into his skin that he lost the game without even scoring a single point. 
their coach urged the boys down the tunnel before the cameras could get any more shots of them. samy tried pulling herself together, but her hiccuping cries didn’t stop slipping out no matter how hard she tried holding them in. 
boston’s side of the lobby was nearly silent which almost mirrored michigan’s team two days ago. suddenly, seeing those happy memories wasn’t as easy anymore. samy’s mind raced wondering if this game really was the last for her favorite trio or if they’d stay on one more season with boston. 
thirty minutes passed before the bc boys slowly trickled out of the locker room. their bloodshot eyes and tear stained faces were enough to send more tears into samy’s own eyes. her lip quivered waiting for her boyfriend to appear, but he didn’t come out after his usual spot behind ryan and gabe. the two boys found samy’s gaze, frowning even deeper. 
“hey, i’m so sorry. i-i have no words,” samy brought them into big hugs hoping to ease a bit of their ache. 
“what a fucking night,” ryan muttered bitterly. 
“you guys played well. those refs were idiots making calls,” the brunette shook her head. 
“will’s still in there. he’s..he’s not taking this one too well. you can go in if you want, but he may explode. I i don’t want you to think he’s mad at you, he’ll just find something to take his anger out on,” gabe explained briefly. samy’s eyes slid towards the locker room doorway where her boyfriend hid. 
“don’t worry, i know how he gets. I’ll see if i can talk to him,” she couldn’t be scared of will. 
he was her best friend and boyfriend. he’d never intentionally hurt her and if he said things, she knew he was just angry with himself, not her. the girl shuffled her way towards the locker room trying to put on a brave face for will’s sake. 
she knocked on the door before slowly pushing it open. her eyes scanned the practically empty room until she found her boyfriend slumped in his stall at the end of the benches. her hands trembled as she slid further in and leaned against the door. 
“will?” 
his eyes snapped towards hers. he looked like a mess and that only unleashed more waterworks seeing him in this state. it wasn’t one samy saw him a lot in, so when she did, it hurt extra hard. 
“if you’re here to try and make me feel better, i don’t wanna hear it,” the boy mumbled bitterly which quickly caught samy off guard. 
she wasn’t expecting that from him so immediately. 
“i’m not. just here to be with you,” the girl said, trying to hide the shake in her voice. 
“well, i’m not really in the mood to be around anyone right now. just go. i’ll be out in a few minutes,” the bitterness in his voice definitely stung, but samy tried shaking him off knowing he was just upset. 
“will..” she inched forward, wanting to reach out to him. he looked as if anyone touched him he’d just break into a million pieces. 
“i said go. i don’t need your fucking sympathy. i feel feel like shit,” the blonde snapped this time making samy instantly draw back. 
“i know you’re upset, i get it. this loss fucking sucks. i’m just trying—” 
“you don’t fucking get it, samy! i just lost the championship game 2-0. we scored zero points. you know how fucking embarrassing that is? i’ve been trying to prove myself all season about how good i can be and then i lose the championship game. you’ll never fucking get it!” there it was. 
will’s tone rose with anger and hurt all mixed into one. samy swallowed the nerves climbing higher in her stomach as she tried remembering none of this was really directed at her. she was just the person will was getting his anger out on. 
“i-i do get it, will. remember my championship game in december? we choked. i-i get it, i do. it sucks and i’m so sorry it ended this way. i wish it didn’t—”
“stop saying you get it. it’s not the fucking same. you’ve never had to work for anything in your life because of your family!” 
the blonde’s harsh words finally hit a nerve. samy’s face twisted and she didn’t know anymore if he really didn’t mean it or not, but through the anger, will realized what he said. 
“samy..i didn’t—”
“fuck you, will. you of all people should know how hard i’ve worked to be where i am right now. i know you’re upset about everything right now, but you don’t need to bring me down to make yourself feel better. don’t bother waiting up. i’m leaving with ryan and gabe,” samy stormed out of the locker room before will could say anything more.
the tears streamed down her face as soon as she was in the lobby again. ryan and gabe instantly noticed her distraught expression, immediately going to her. 
“shit, what happened?” ryan muttered. 
“can we just go? i can’t deal with him right now,” samy choked out. the two exchanged a worried glance, but obliged. 
the whole ride back to the hotel was nothing but silence as everyone reeled from the disappointing night. 
gabe let samy camp out in his hotel room for the night. he didn’t dare ask her what happened in the locker room knowing she’d tell him if she wanted to; however, the dark-haired boy wanted to go knock some sense into will knowing he most definitely snapped too hard at samy which made her want to avoid him. 
it was almost two in the morning when there was a small knock. still awake, the two exchanged wary glances, so gabe got the door. 
he pulled it open to reveal a very weary, teary-eyed, sad, and frustrated will. for a moment, gabe almost let him in, but he stopped himself because he didn’t want the boy blowing up at samy again. the girl sat nervously on the bed just out of sight of the door listening in on them.
“is she here?” will rasped out, voice dry from the amount he cried after samy left the locker room and getting back to the hotel. 
“i’m not sure i wanna answer that,” gabe stood his ground. 
“come on, perreault. leno said he didn’t have her,” will tried again. 
hearing how wrecked he sounded broke samy’s heart all over again. gabe gazed back at her, a look in his eyes asking her if she really wanted to see him. 
even though he insulted her, something in samy was still trying to justify it for him being upset and angry. she really wanted to believe he didn’t mean it. with that, the girl crawled off the bed and shuffled her way behind gabe’s 6’1 figure. 
“we can talk in your room,” samy mumbled. 
“o-okay,” the shake in her boyfriend’s voice made samy want to lunge herself at him and make all the pain go away, but she had to stand up for herself still. 
“you’re sure?” gabe wondered before letting her go. 
“i’m sure. i’ll see you tomorrow,” she rubbed his arm and stepped around him. 
her and will walked three doors down where his hotel room was. it was basically hers too since most of her stuff was scattered across the room over the past few days they’ve been there. 
will shut the door behind them. the brunette looked at him expectantly knowing she said everything she could. a beat of silence passed before the tears quickly filled the blonde’s eyes and he started completely sobbing in front of her. he crumpled against the door, choking sobs falling from his lips as he body sunk into the ground. 
for a second, samy just stared at him until her instincts kicked in and she went to him without hesitation this time. 
“oh will,” she curled into his side, stroking his hair as his body fell into hers. 
“i’m so sorry. i didn’t mean any of it. i don’t know why i said it. i was upset and i know that’s not an excuse at all,” the boy rambled into her shoulder. 
“i know this loss hurts, but taking your anger out on people with harsh words isn’t gonna make it better,” samy said.
“i know, i know. i-i’m so sorry. i shouldn’t have lashed out on you. that’s not fair to you at all.” 
“i was just trying to comfort you like i always do after losses,” the girl hated seeing her boyfriend so upset like this. his tears dripped everywhere on her even after samy tried wiping them away with her thumb. 
“i know. i shouldn’t have pushed you away like that. i just.. I didn’t want you to see me like that,” will’s voice grew softer at his small admission. 
“what do you mean like that?” i’ve seen you lose games before.”
“i don’t know if this is how you felt after your soccer game, but i felt so pathetic for losing a championship game where we didn’t even score. my pride was hurt and i worried you’d think i wasn’t good enough anymore because i lost like that,” his words continued breaking samy’s heart. 
she grabbed ahold of his face so he was looking at her, “i’d never think any less of you because you lost. it happens. you’re not pathetic for losing and i promise it doesn’t make me look at you any differently.” 
“i guess i’m just always scared you’ll get sick of me and realize i’m not actually worth it. that and a hundred other emotions were just going through me and it came out really wrong,” will frowned. 
a small sigh escaped the girl’s lips hearing the boy she’s known all her life doubt himself so much. “you’re always worth it, will. nothing’s ever gonna change that for me, okay? i’m always gonna be in love with you and wanna be around you win or lose, whatever's happening in your career. you’re stuck with me,” a small laugh escaped their lips at the last part. 
“i know that. i just get really doubtful when i get down on myself and hard losses like that happen.” 
“i get it, but i’m not going anywhere, okay? you played your best tonight, those refs were making shit calls and unfortunately, denver just figured us out.” 
a small nod came from will. he pushed his forehead onto samy’s just trying to ease all the thoughts running through his mind while focusing on the way she ran her fingers gently through his hair and around his curls. some of his roots were rough and red from the way he pulled harshly on them earlier, so her gentle motions slowly eased the ache. 
“i’m scared that i don��t know what’s gonna happen next with any of us,” will spoke again after a small silence. 
he lifted his head again to meet his girlfriend’s gaze before leaning it against the door. 
“are you gonna sign on?” the idea played in samy’s mind as well after tonight’s game. 
the decision was entirely up to the coaches of each of the guy’s respective teams, but considering how well all of them played and improved in one season, they may want them sooner rather than later. 
“i don’t know. it’s up to whether the sharks want me now or later,” will answered. 
“have you talked to ryan or gabe? what they may do?” 
“washington’s pushing closer to the playoffs. they may want ryan on for it. i dunno. gabe’s most likely gonna stay. i don’t think the rangers are quite ready for him yet. the ideal situation is we all stay one one more season with boston,” will explained a bit, his fingers drawing mindles shapes into samy’s leg. 
“what do the sharks say about you?” the girl wondered with a raised eyebrow. 
“you know what they say about me. they want me now. they wanna wait another year. it’s..sort of up to me i guess,” will shrugged a bit, avoiding eye contact. 
“would you sign on now?” she rephrased her question from earlier. 
“if i sign on now, my entire life gets flipped around in a week and i have to move to california, but then i’d possibly get to play in the playoffs. if i wait, i get to stay with boston and everyone for another year and more importantly, see you more frequently than if i was in california,” samy rolled her eyes at the last part—he was always so down bad for her. 
“don’t make the decision based on me, will. you’ll see me still.” 
“i know, but i think i do subconsciously anyway. you’re just my life now,” his words sent a deep blush across the girl’s cheeks. 
“i’m flattered,” she rubbed the side of his cheek making him lean into her touch. 
“you’re everything to me, samy. i’m really, really in love with you and i can’t imagine my life without you in it,” will smiled softly. 
the girl flushed, but returned his smile. hearing those kinds of things come out of his mouth was still something the brunette was getting used to even after 9 months of being together. 
“you’re everything to me too, will. i love you a lot.” 
the boy leaned forward to place a gentle, yet loving kiss on her lips. they melted into one another, small sighs escaping their mouths at the contact. her hands tugged at his curls while his own curved around her waist, pulling her impossibly closer like he needed her as close as possible or else he couldn’t function. 
part of it was true. without samy, will was lost like a fish in the ocean. she was a part of him and he was a part of her. they were intertwined and always would be. her soft lips soothed every single thought and self-doubt will had because as long as his favorite girl believed in him, that was all that mattered. 
“i know i said this already, but thank you for being here. it means a lot to me,” will said when they pulled apart. 
“i’d never miss this. i’ll always skip classes for you,” she grinned. 
the boy beamed, pulling her back in for another kiss. 
the two didn’t get into bed until nearly 3:30 in the morning. samy curled into will’s side, his arm tightly around her as she laid on his chest. the tension in the air completely dissipated and the cries died down. things felt okay again. 
they’d sleep tangled in one another all night knowing the next morning samy had to catch her plane back to michigan and will would be left with one big decision that would decide what plane he had to catch. 
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rjshope · 2 months ago
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gifmaker / cc wrapped 2024!
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I was tagged by most beloveds @raplinenthusiasts @cosmicdreamgrl @jkvjimin @cordiallyfuturedwight @yooboobies @taehyunghobi and @jinstronaut(thank you guys🖤🌷) to share my most popular posts and my favorite ones.
Let's go!
january:
⟡ Yoongi with painted hands // he's cute here no arguments from me ♡ adorkable namgi // lol ♡ that Namjoon live // i'm still recovering btw
february:
⟡ happy Hope on the street♡ rapline saving Jin // i love how you can see their personalities here ♡ Jimin as the cutest dinosaur ever // esp soft for this one
march:
⟡ thank you fo being my artist Jimin live // he said very important thing here ♡ namjin bickering (+Hobi enjoying the show) // i live for bickering namjin ♡ Hobi being Yoongi's favorite seat // yoongi never beating lil meow meow allegations
april:
⟡ Tae and his big brown eyes // y'all just couldn't resist him could you?😁 ♡ that Malta Namjoon // despite the fact that this is my least fav bv season i have a soft spot for this gifset ♡ Dimple gifset for Kayla's birthday // very special work for my very special person🌷
may:
⟡ vibing Namjoon // lmao this is just two simplest b&w gifs and what have y'all done??? 🙈🙈 ♡ namjin laughing // luv my soft boys ♡ Nuts MV // i'm just a weak woman what do you want from me
june:
⟡ SYS Final Kim Taehyung // i'm happy with it, i love this gifset very much <3 ♡ hyung line dynamic in a nutshell // they never fail to crack me up lmao ♡ laughing namgi // so wholesome i love them so much!
july:
⟡ Jin being a good infuence on Namjoon pt.2 // i carried the thought of this gifset in my head for two years, it displays perfectly why these two are so important to me and it's nice to see this post being so appreciated ♡ Hobi being handsome to infinity and beyond // i'm still lost for words you know ♡ Tae gifset for Annie's birthday // this one is very important to me bc it took a lot of my time, blood and sweat to make it, and seeing it floped breaks my heart. Well at least Annie liked it, that's the most important thing. ♡ namjin "revenge is sweet" gifset // if you hear someone making weird evil giggling noises that's me
august:
⟡ jihope being jihope // this is not a gifset this is a happy pill ♡ hyung line from memories of 2015 // i hope i don't need to explain this?!?! ♡ RJ comforting rapline // i'm still sobbing
september:
⟡ namgi dealing with their Jin-hyung // lol#2 ♡ Namjoon birthday compilation gifset // it was my first time doing something like this and i really love how it turned out ♡ maknae line for Pat's birthday // i know this is my post but whenever i see it i sit and look at it in awe (i'm allowed to be proud with myself from time to time) ♡ sope flirting // they are so married it's annoying
october:
⟡ Jin and his mindset // if more of us were like him it would be a merrier place (yes, quoting king of my heart here) ♡ namseok gifset for Julia's birthday // i had so much fun making these ♡ peach Namjoon // iykyk ♡ winter package 2020 hyung line // rare photoshoot with just four of them in the same unit
november:
⟡ Jin, Joon, the saxophone and Jimmy Fallon // totally agree with y'all😌 ♡ Bangbangcon namgi // Yoongi's smile i'm gonna sob ♡ Namjoon and his healing smile // i miss him so much ♡ Jin performing Another Level // i do not make performances gifset often and this is a good song and a good performance and i love how these look
december:
⟡ cute barefaced Yoongi from ITS1 // lol we all are so whipped for him ♡ Jin for Dicon // playing with color isolation was fun ♡ soft (and a bit drunken) Hobi from ITS1 // the look on his face make my heart flutter ♡ cuteness agression namgi // i can't stop giggling, Yoongi your crush is showing ♡ ON Kinetic Manifesto Film Shoot Sketch | Hyung line // my boys looking fine as hell, that's it that's the tweet
Idk if it me or you really can see how my january gifs look different from december gifs. It didn't happen on purpose, but it's something that is interesting to see.
It fun to see how my year started with 2019 year and with MOTS: Persona era. And now i'm closing it by entering BE and Life Goes On era *breathes out* Yeah, life goes on and my journey goes on as well😁
Anyway it was my second year here and i'd like to thank you all for staying with me, for you support, for your reblogs and comments, it means a lot💖 I enjoyed this ride, let's continue next year with the boys!
tagging @namchyoon @kimtaegis @jung-koook @hvseoks @btsiu
@taee @kth1 @heybaetae @oumoumimi (no pressure ofc <3)
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sunshine-zenith · 6 months ago
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I remember someone pointing out that even by anti-fairy standards, Irep's cube shape was unusual, and that it might have something to do with Anti-Wanda craving/eating rectangular objects all throughout her pregnancy lmao. And even if he can change his head shape- I'm assuming that changing his name to Irep specifically to match Peri was also a choice and he's just really committed to the bit.
But I do hope he comes back, if for no other reason than I'm fairly certain they were on good terms by the end of the original series; or at least, Peri didn't hate Irep, and was actively trying to befriend him. Did they pull a Hazel and Dev and that friendship only lasted until Irep got jealous of Peri again and then the cycle just. Continued infinitely. Why is Peri gloating and laughing in Irep's face these days.
Like I don't think Irep has really changed through the years, but Peri definitely has and it's clearly impacted their relationship.
I just wanna applaud those last few paragraphs because you helped out to words another thing I was thinking about — Peri grew up, and he looks it. Irep hasn’t, if anything he’s gotten less mature. Him still looking like his infant self could be a reflection of that, either by the writers out of universe or as a subconscious manifestation in universe (or, yeah, it could be all those couch cushions lol)
He did specifically call Peri’s name change irritating, so I’m imagining there’s some bitterness on his part at least
I do desperately hope that if we get a season 2, we get something to fill the gap between Irep and Peri’s infancy and adulthood — a flashback, some sort if magic hijinx, even an off hand comment. Outside of their parents, they are each other’s most long lasting relationships, and there was some serious growth by the end of the original series for both of them
When Cosmo and Wanda said to Dev that Peri was waiting for him to call and that he thought they were just “on a break,” it made me wonder if something similar happened between him and Irep — like at some point, they had their own falling out (possibly closer to what Dev and Hazel went through throughout the series’s than Peri and Dev), and Peri just Waited. He waited for Irep to cool down, to call. He put in so much work to befriend Irep, got to know and treasure him, and he was possibly in denial for the longest time about losing his friend (which, again, would just be another loss for him — he lost his brother, he ended up low/no contact with his parents for a while, and now he’s lost his first ever godkid. Having lost Irep would be another thing for him to deal with along the way)
That might even be why he acted so smug about Jorgen putting Irep in his place — it could’ve been a little bit of that years old hurt leaking out, combined with the fresh hurt of his godkid basically rejecting him. Maybe not the most mature way to handle things, but hey, Peri was going through it that episode
I would love to see them possibly reconcile, as a way to officially close the arc from the original series (but that would require them to handle the whole Letting Peri Almost Die From Magic Build Up thing. I give Dev a lot of leeway with that since he legit had no idea, but Irep had to know he was basically committing manslaughter, even if he didn’t think through the fact that if Peri dies, he probably also dies. Dude needs to at the very least give Peri an I’m Sorry for that one first)
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pipsqueakparker · 5 months ago
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Blitz's Horse Ranch - Sims 4
I did it, I made a lovely little ranch for Blitz, Stolas, Via, & Loona. Here's some pics. (Horse count is around 30 last I checked, btw)
Exterior Shots: Front, Front Porch, Back - I'm not a great builder, it looks big but all of the rooms are somehow so small? IDK, but we ran with what we built. (also most intricate roofing job of my life i swear) Landscaping was done with Stolas in mind, I think he'd keep it all looking very pretty... I'll do the back at some point, plus probably put a little garden out there. We also have a telescope on the second story deck and a nectar making station for Blitz on the back porch lmao
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Interior:
Foyer/Kitchen/Dining Room - I tried to pull in little pieces where I could, apart from all the horses, but also the polaroids & photos on the wall. (I intend to play with them, so all the blank frames are there to fill during gameplay.)
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Informal Family Room - I spent like twenty minutes choosing a couch... this is about where I lost my commitment to using as much of the Horse Ranch pack as I could... I still think I used a whole lot, though.
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Formal Living Room/Bar Room - IDK what this is, but I know Stolas got to design it (there's also a lovely bar back that for some reason just wasn't showing up while I was taking these screenshots?? It's not just that little bar on that side of the room I swear)
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Guest Room (For when Millie & Moxxie come over) - Very simple, because for the most part this is just an extra room where I'll probably keep skill items.
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Primary Bedroom & En Suite - Blitz & Stolas - I tried to really lean into a story here, I love coming up with a story as I'm building, and this story... well, I think it's clear to see that there were many battles when they were moving in together. Stolas won when it came to picking out furniture, but he obviously caved for some of Blitz's design choices... namely the monstrosity of a rug. He hates it because its' ugly, but he loves it because Blitz loved it enough to offer sexual favors for a month if they could buy it. (An empty bribe, it's not like that wasn't going to happen anyway.)
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Loona's Room & En Suite - You can probably tell that I started getting bored once I got upstairs... I've been doing this for about eight hours, I'll definitely go back in and add more to the upstairs, but this is what we have for now for Loona. (Claw marks are there bc of nightmares, just so you have that angsty backstory I came up with.)
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Via's Room - I feel bad because its so small, I'm already planning to renovate it, but this is what I got for now.
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Stolas's Reading Room - This was the first room I decorated and it probably shows, but honestly I loved making him a little library/reading nook here. He also has a cow plant, and once it's seasonally appropriate in-game, he'll get a little garden out back.
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I also made them and started playing (Blitz rescued his first horse, Sunbeam). This is the only screen shot I remembered to take, and Loona started walking away as I took it - rude - but they were all just sat together in the family room watching a movie it was so sweet!
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I did make Stolas & Via spellcasters, and Loona a werewolf. (I'll have to throw my Angel & Molly into this save as their neighbors.)
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cowboylikeyouu · 1 month ago
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i'm watching supernatural for the first time and i've been keeping track of every time i cried so far, so welcome to
✨amy's spn cry counter✨
for it to count at least one actual tear has to roll down my face bc i tear up WAY too often and this list would never end if that counted.
i'm currently on s4 e19, so here's the cries up to that point and now i'll just start reblogging this whenever i cry again 🥱
(there were a lot of moments where i wanted to cry sooo bad but they were kind of TOO devastating to cry like idk sometimes i just get choked up and feel like someone stabbed me but can't cry whelp)
#1: season 2 episode 4
it wasn't a specific moment, pretty much just the complete weight of everyone's devastation & worry crashing down on me at once <3 sam's puppy dog eyes whenever he looked at dean were the last straw
#2 season 2 episode 20
when dean saw his mom again in the alternate reality or whatever it was
#3 season 2 episode 21
this one's obvious isn't it, SAM DIED !!! and we got a hug between the two (...that one of them had to die for, but hey, a win is a win) and them hugging always makes me wanna sob
#4 season 2 episode 21 (again)
i can't remember the specific thing that happened at the end of that episode but whatever it was it made me cry
#5 season 3 episode 7
when dean started explaining what's wrong with the car and told sam to fix it jesus i LOST it.
#6 season 3 episode 8
little sammy in the flashback scene, spending christmas alone??? i was a mess. young sam always makes me wanna strangle myself, the actor did SUCH a good job
#7 season 3 episode 11
this one's by far my fav episode so far (it's the groundhog day one) but GOD when they revealed that sam spent SIX MONTHS on his own after dean died??? and it's just??? completely glossed over?? like sure, they basically went back in time so those months don't really matter, but he still experienced them???? HE SPENT LESS TIME ON HIS OWN WHILE DEAN WAS IN HELL LIKE ARE YOU KIDDING ME????? idk that one messed me up
#8 season 4 episode 11
actually cried at something that happened in episode 10 (dean talking about his time in hell) but it was during the recap of that episode lmao somehow it hit harder the second time around lol
#9 season 4 episode 13
during the flashback to their time in high school when the teacher asked sam if he even wanted to take over the family business and little baby sammy was like "nobody's ever asked me this :( actually no, i don't want to"
#10 season 4 episode 16
the whole cas/dean interaction before dean went in to torture alastair. like "for what it's worth, i would give anything not to have you do this" ARE YOU KIDDING ME ????
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insomniac-101 · 2 years ago
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So something that I often don't see people discuss is the manner in which the 9th and the 10th doctor's seasons are so intrinsically connected that it is almost impossible to understand a lot of key character arcs if you choose to skip it upon rewatch. The reason why I say this is because the moment you reach season 2, 10 is essentially the product of the development 9 achieves at the end of his season. To skip him, would mean that you also miss context as to the reason why Rose is so important and in turn, not understand the reason why their bond in particular is such a big part of the plot during the 10th's era.
Now bare with me, because I'm about to go off a bit lmao.
The first season of nuwho not only serves as an introduction to many of the key characters we see later on, such as: the Doctor, Rose, Jackie, Jack, Mickey, Harriet jones, etc. but it also serves as an introduction for the concept of the series as a whole. Prior to this, doctor who as a franchise had a reputation of being a geeky sci-fi show with no real wide spread appeal. Remaining as a niche interest to many, up until the reboot returned and reintroduced the show to a newer audience.
This is important to note because this is one of the main reasons why we see such a huge emphasis placed on the companions' lives in the reboot. Because RTD meant to expand the world of Doctor who and its audience, and by doing so, he strived to try a multitude of new plots that were otherwise never explored previously. This is why the romantic plotline of his season is so crucial to the story itself because he means to explore a facet of humanity not previously seen with the Doctor as a character. RTD essentially built this plot line from scratch, as the only other attempt at exploring such an angle was received negatively (The 8th Doctor's movie). So there's a degree of leniency that I give his writing In particular because like I said prior, he had no prior reference for exploring humanity to the degree in which the new series does.
The ninth doctor, when we meet him, is essentially a recluse. He is in a state of stagnation, implied to have been alone for some time after the war and it gives off the impression that he's no longer accustomed to being around people. He's often direct, rudely so and very standoffish to anyone that isn't immediately measuring up to his standards. This isn't to say that he isn't charming in his own way. He's sarcastic and when he tries, he can actually be very good with people. But the war still weighs heavily on his conscious and so, he views the world through the eyes of a soldier. Prioritizing the act of surviving rather than slowing down and actually taking the time to live life.
I mean, the man essentially meets Rose while blowing up her workplace and if that isn't concerning on its own merit than I don't know what is lmao.
A scene that sticks out to me the most about him in particular is when he looks at himself in the mirror for the first time. He notes that he has big ears, and from the manner in which he says it the implication that he perhaps has not seen himself in a long time is not lost to us. This coupled with the knowledge that he had indeed been seen traveling prior to meeting Rose, gives the phrase a more dark connotation that makes sense for his character.
I like to think that this indicates that the guilt of what he did to stop the war weighs so heavily on him that he could never bring himself to face his reflection. Because truly, to have gone so long without seeing yourself, not even in the reflection of a window or other surface is not something that is easy to do. Rather, it is something you have to go out of your way to do. Also it's important to note that his appearance is in fact a reflection of that weariness he feels. With his body, being older outwardly (appearing 40ish ) and his features being very sharp and serious. Even his hair is pretty short, much like how a soldier would keep it as a means of not wasting any time on worrying on something so inconvenient. His preference for darker colors and his constant outfit is also very noticably practical, not at all decorative like his prior bodies. This is purposeful, because it is what sets him apart from prior versions of the character and an easy way to visually see his most prominent traits.
Now with that out of the way, now I can discuss how 9 changes and what his relationship to Rose is like, so that one can better understand why Rose is such an important part of the Doctor's character.
From the moment the two meet, you can see he harbors an immediate curiosity towards her. Here they are, trapped in an elevator being attacked by a group of living mannequins and yet, Rose is almost unaffected.
That isn't to say she isn't afraid, she is, but her fear doesn't stop her from asking questions and demanding explanations. She doesn't shy away from him, rather she confronts him head on and even shows a level of concern for other people while she is actively the one in danger. It is enough to prompt him to ask her name, but not enough to involve her. Preferring to instead keep his distance.
It is not until another chance meeting that he gradually lets her in, allowing her to humor him with her curiosity and we see once more that he is in fact very good at socializing, but only with certain people. The reason why I stress this is because he often outwardly puts this front of coldness towards those that don't interest him. Rose was able to look past this front, and seems to look past his rather cold attitude towards other humans. He often stresses how inept they are, going on tangents about how they're nothing more than apes but she ignores it and tries to get at the core of the issue. That's why they mesh so well, because she is able to separate the fluff he inserts into his answers and take it for what it is. That isn't to say she's a doormat, she just knows when to pick her battles.
"do you know like we were saying? About the world revolving. It's like you're a kid, the first time they tell you that the world is turning and you just can't quite believe it cause everything looks like it's standing still. I can feel it. The turn of the earth. The ground beneath our feet is spinning 1,000 miles an hour and the entire planet is hurtling round the sun at 67,00 miles an hour. And I can feel it, we're falling through space you and me. Clinging to the skin of this tiny little world, and if we let go.. that's who I am. Now forget me, Rose Tyler"
He is describing the manner in which he views the world. Unlike how a kid is unable to comprehend the vast truths of how the world functions and remains naive of it for a period of time, he is a man that was never given that chance to be unaware of how it functions to an infuriating degree. He sees the world for how it is, dark, unforgiving and so direct. Everything is calculated so precisely and he can't even begin to comprehend why anyone would see the good in it as it's just that, a planet.
But that's why he finds humans so interesting. There's a part of him that holds onto that hope that it is something more, that perhaps he is missing out on a purpose behind all the darkness. That's why he is running amongst them, to find a reason behind their way of thinking. To experience the world through the eyes of the hypothetical child, rather than the adult who breaks the illusion.
Not only that, but this conversation also let's us in on how touch-deprived he is.
For it is in a moment of vulnerability that he allows himself to reach out and touch Rose physically. Grabbing her hand for emphasis on how heavy this revelation burdens him. It's a cry for help in a sense, because he has reached the point where he has metaphorically "let go". Dropping her hand, to show that he is losing that last part of him that clings to that hope of finding something that will allow him to question his view of the world. He is miserable and lonely, because when you view the world through such a cynical lens it becomes all the more apparent that life is so lonely. If everything is doomed, then why go out of your way to care?
You see this in the way he remains unaffected by the reveal of Mickey's "death." Having grown so used to it, that he finds it off-putting to see that Rose is freaking out as a result. It happens everyday to people far more important so why give it any real weight if it's inevitable? Why ascribe a meaning to something that just is?
Remember when I mentioned it is implied that he was traveling on his own for a while? What places did he visit? The Titanic, the Kennedy assassination, the explosion of Karakota. These are all fixed points of time that are associated with absolute tragedies. But all the same, they're key points in life where the world remained cruel without reason. Thus fueling his very uncharitable view of the world and how it functions.
That's where Rose becomes key to his overall development. As a human, she inevitably views the world through the lens of that child. She doesn't know the ins and outs of the universe's processes, yet she continues living without ever really seeking to understand it better. It doesn't matter to her that the people around her aren't necessarily important in the grand scheme of things, they matter because they just do. She is capable of loving others and affording care to others simply because she wants to, not because she has to. She is confronted with alien threats the moment he walks into her life, and yet her view of the world and her existence doesn't really change. She does not harden rather, she curiously grows from it. Growing wiser and more aware rather than crippling under the discovery of another threat in the universe.
She is clinging to the understanding of the tiny little world she lives in, yet her hold doesn't relent. For she is not falling, to imply so would mean that he was right in his assertion that our existence is doomed. No, instead in the place of any real meaningful explanation about the world's existence is something so innately human: hope. An illogical thing to always maintain, yet she always seems to have it.
After all, it is such a confusing notion when you think about it. We have no reason to believe that things will improve, and that we'll be met with good outcomes. It's so metaphorical, not at all tethered to something practical like numbers and data and yet, even when the odds are against us, somehow we hope things will improve.
It's that aspect that he wishes he understood.
(i would love to dedicate a whole analysis on Rose in a separate post so for now, I will only focus on the Doctor and her role in his life)
This is why he takes her to the ends of the universe on their first trip. He's testing her, seeing if this will be enough to prompt a reaction out of her that fits his narrative. He also seeks companionship, to have someone understand what it's like to see your planet burn and to have yourself remain as the sole survivor. In a way, to justify the validity of his misery and guilt. She's affected of course. It's in that moment that she realizes, the scope of the universe and is faced with the undeniable truth that everything does end. It shakes her and you can see her sort of doubt her view of the world. No longer able to remain blissfully unaware of the big picture when it is quite literally in your face.
But something she has, and he lacks is a foundation. Rose still has her mother, someone to return to at the end of the day. She can be comforted by the people in her life while his inability to let anyone in, essentially stunts him.
When given the choice to spare Cassandra, he refuses. He lacks the capability of seeing past the evil, and assumes that there is no good in her. No second chances. An act that catches Rose off guard, who in spite of personally recieving the brunt of Cassandra's cruelty, she asks the Doctor to save her.
Eventually he takes her back to her time. He entrusts her with more information regarding the war and the death of his people. People pass them by, oblivious to his presence as he is wallowing in the sorrow of remembering. It's a metaphor, of sorts. While our two protagonists are brutally aware of the doom that awaits them in the future and they remain stuck in place reminiscing, the world around them continues moving on.
He is giving her every reason to run, to leave him behind and save the very last shreds of naivety she has.
But when he asks her if she wants to leave, to no longer accompany him on his adventures, she refuses. Because his confession puts it all into perspective.
He is hurting.
He desperately craves company: to have a hand to hold onto and keep him grounded as the world falls apart. Yet more than ever is she aware of her limitations; that she cannot undo what has been done to him.
And so, she does what she knows she can do to help ease the pain even if it is very miniscule. Tells him that he has her, and that his pain is one she can now share and understand. She offers him chips, not because it will magically make it all disappear but because it will distract him from the pain of remembering. It's also her favorite food, so no doubt she is trying to share that sense of comfort it brings her with him.
Such a human thing to not focus on fixing the bigger problem and instead focus on what can be changed in the current moment. They still have time until the end of the earth, so why spend more time dwelling on it?
That is her response to his question.
I believe the episode the unquiet dead is where he realizes the extent of his feelings for her. There they are about to be pulled apart by a horde of zombies yet Rose doesn't regret coming along. She tells him so and in the end all she asks of him is that they fight for their lives. Still clinging on to that bit of hope that they could get out of this, even if it is misplaced. To stay together in spite of their inevitable deaths is all she asks for, and he in turn tells her how glad he is to have met her. Assuring her that he is glad it's her that is there by his side as he clings to her hand like a life line. Somehow, having someone there to hold made the inevitable more bearable.
For a single moment, he remembers what it is like to not regret something.
But no, they live! Again and again, even if logically it makes no sense given how the world works. All the while, he meets more and more extraordinary people. With Rose, always reaching out to others as they embark on every new adventure. Thus indirectly providing him insight on the manner in which normal people are capable of doing brave and incredible acts even if it is at the cost of their own life. Their hope in a future for the people they hold dear, motivating them to put everything on the line if it meant that there was even a slight chance everything would be alright.
There's good in people, even those that outwardly appear to not be worth the trouble. And it's that potential he latches on to, and why he tries so hard to lend a hand when he can.
This is actually where the trend of the importance of knowing people's names starts, because the companions often serve as his connection to the humans around them. They ground his perspective, reminding him to not focus so much on the grand scheme of things that he forgets to look at the smaller details. This is why in the episode Midnight it is so tragic that no one asked for the stewardes' name. For up until that point, he knew better than to not at the very least humanize her (by asking for something as basic as her name, her story, etc.) rather than see her as pawn in the midst of the problem. That is the principal that Rose instilled in him and yet when left alone, he finds himself forgetting to do so. Thus, why he takes the revelation to heart.
But I'm getting ahead of myself lol
It is when he is confronting the last of the daleks that he has to reconsider his beliefs of how the world had up till now functioned. He has been proven time and time again that the world is not always such a negative place, and that there is at times tranquility that could be found in the midst of the chaos. That the universe and it's inhabitants are capable of doing both good and evil.
So why is he so quick to want to kill the last of the daleks and cling to that cynicism he was beginning to reconsider? Here he is faced with a being who understands his pain, but in the form of his biggest enemy. It is not innocent, having been at one time capable of monstrous acts that caused mass suffering but...neither is he. There it stands defenseless and unarmed and yet he is the one threatening it with a weapon, just like Rose reasons. She is alive and unharmed, standing next to a dalek yet the active threat is not the dalek, it's him. He is tempted to kill it because his first instinct is to resort back to that hatred that gave him purpose for so long. The same poison the daleks used to eradicate the rest of his people. But is it truly incapable of being good, if not, then why is he any different? To give into the temptation would mean to validate that goodness could not be found everywhere. That if he followed the same mindset that once drove him to pull the trigger on everyone involved in the whole war, than he was doomed to become one of them. To repeat the endless cycle of violence and prove once and for all that he is a monster that cannot change.
Again the answer to the question is up to us to decide. But for him, there's only one clear answer.
No one else has to die. By choosing to not do anything he can live another day, without carrying the guilt of another being dying at his hands. Not because it has to be done, but because he has the option to refuse.
He can no longer assert that its existence as the final survivor of his race isn't important. That just because he hates it, doesn't mean it doesn't deserve a second chance like he got.
Really who is he to pass judgement, when there was a point in his life where he too was blinded by rage and the very narrow view he held of the world?
There is always a choice, and sometimes, the choice is to not take part in that decision.
And so that's what he does.
Rose takes on the burden for him, reaching out to the dalek in the same compassionate way he once did for him. Ordering the dalek to die not out of spite, but out of mercy because that is what the dalek wanted. A being born with the ultimate goal of surviving at all costs with hatred running through its blood, yet it's last moments are spent anguishing over all the death it caused. But unlike the Doctor, who strived to change as a result, he used up his second chance to end the pain. All it asked in return, was comfort or in other words...a hand to hold.
Or..so we think.
It's this ability to look past his biases that allows him to see the good in individuals like Mickey, Jack, and even Rose, when she inevitably screws up. He is able to grant them a second chance to prove themselves and keep them grounded, just like they did for him. His bonds to said people strengthen as a result and now he travels with a group of individuals he can trust with his life. People that can ease the burden and see the good in him.
Now the final episodes of his run is where the final test to his resolve to change is put into question. In a cruel twist of faith, history repeats itself.
Once again, he is given a choice: to let humanity die at the hand of the daleks, or end it all himself.
But alas he chooses not to give in. To not let himself become like the very thing he despises, because the alternative would mean witnessing the mass death of humanity at his hands. A group of beings he personally saw was capable of so much good, and was directly responsible for his change of heart. They reminded him that he was not above changing and that he could find meaning in simply continuing to find the good in others. He refuses, and so he seals his fate.
Yes he would die as a result, but at least he'll die knowing that he did all that he could. That he did not repeat the same cycle of violence that drove him to make the decision to eradicate all that he knew in an act of desperation.
He was free at last of the hatred that poisoned him for so long and it's due in part to the emotion that now stood in its place. Something he slowly cultivated throughout the span of his episodes: Love.
Love for humanity.
Love for Rose.
Love for himself. Because he finally did something he would not live to regret
" Before I go, i just want to tell you that you were fantastic. Absolutely fantastic. And you know what? So was I!"
When he finally regenerates, it is done with the intention that his final act is not one of destruction, but love. This man, with the blood of so many on his hands, was able to forgive himself through the compassion extended to him when he was at his lowest. Rose a mere human, through sheer kindness, was able to motivate the doctor to keep going. To not hang up on the inevitabilities of life, and to find beauty in what was fleeting.
To have faith in the good of the people around him, even when it wasn't easy.
Most importantly, she reminded him that his journey was not one that had to be solitary. He could share the burden with others, and in turn, build genuine friendships that would help ease that loneliness he felt.
What makes Rose special to the doctor is not that she is inherently special. She is not someone of high status nor this faultless god that is capable of doing no wrong. No what makes her important to him is the fact that she was perceptive enough to realize that he needed help, and selflessly gave it at a time where he was at his lowest. She extended the best of humanity towards him during a time where he desperately needed a reminder that life was more than just pain. She never gave up on him, always assuring him that he was capable of doing good even when he himself didn't believe it.
This was not a bond forged on shallow appearances or attraction, no, it was a deep friendship in which both people involved grew to become better versions of themselves by the end. They just so happened to fall in love in the process.
Something I want to point out is that the reason why he has the courage to kiss Rose is because his love for her, he feels, is unrequited. He thinks this will be the last chance to show her how much she means to him in this body, and perhaps ever. He is insecure, you see that in the way he practically sneers at any man that looks at her yet he never makes a move himself. That is why he is deeply confused as to why it takes her so long to warm up to his 10th incarnation in the Christmas invasion. Going as far as to claim that she had given up on him. A behavior that to him, makes no sense as he was essentially tailored to her tastes. A pretty boy, just like the ones she showed interest in previously.
This is why he asks her upon regenerating what she thinks of his appearance and once again when he wakes up from his coma. He wants her to fawn over him but doesn't take into account that maybe, bursting into flames isn't exactly a normal human occurrence lol
But we see that that is not true. His looks were never something that bothered her. Because whenever she is made to make a choice between the doctor and someone else, it's always him. Even at the expense of what he would consider to be the safer options.
Rose loved him since his 9th incarnation. This is made evident in the manner in which she immediately asks him to change back once he regenerates into 10 (Doctor Who Born Again, Children In Need Special 2005).
"Can you change back?"
"Do you want me to?"
"Yeah"
"Oh."
"Can you?"
"No"
(note: if you haven't seen this clip, I strongly recommend doing so as it adds so much context to the conflict explored in the Christmas special)
If she had solely loved him when he was 10, then she would have accepted him easily but she didn't. It took her the entirety of the Christmas invasion to understand that he was still the same man. This is why the episode focuses so much on 10 sort of dancing around her, trying to earn her approval by showing off how he's still the same man. Going as far as to pan on his face numerous times as he wistfully looks at her direction, all while he fights the sycorax as if to make sure that she is watching him be impressive. (it's something I realized upon rewatch, just how desperately he is trying to earn back her approval lol)
So with all of this in mind, nine essentially transforms into a new man. Figuratively and literally lol. A man that finds the joy in living again and meets each challenge with a curiosity akin to that of a child. He's fun, far less burdened (outwardly) by the death of his people and more open to meeting new people. He becomes what 9 physically believes to be the ideal image of a partner Rose would want, down to the wispy hair and handsome features. Not to mention younger, as if, physically representing the the burden being lifted from his body, thus de-aging him.
But with this new man that was born out of his love for humanity and Rose, there's a conflict that is more apparent than ever. Will he be able to overcome the implications that come with falling in love with a human?
This is where the conflict shifts, because with confronting this question he is left to actually take into consideration what it means to fall deeper in love with her. A scenario he previously only humored in fantasies because he was unaware that she returned them.
Had she simply loved him as a friend, it would have been easy to ignore it but no she had fallen for him too. So now he can no longer skirt around it. To fall for a human would mean to expose her to what a Time lord's life and perspective entails. How alien he truly is and how that especially affects the manner in which they communicate. This is explicitly said in the Christmas invasion, when her whole world shifts at the reminder that he is in fact not human.
"The thing is, I thought I knew him, Mum. I thought me and him were...and then he goes on and does this. I keep forgetting he is not human"
This is what series 2's main conflict is.
But it is far from one sided.
She in return, has to confront the inevitability of her death. Can she ask that of him, to put aside the pain and let her live out the rest of her days by his side? Once she outlives those she loves, would she become someone unlike herself?
Because now it's not a question of will they won't they, they know how they feel about one another. No, it's a matter of when.
This is why series two appears to have very little conflict between the two at first glance, but that's because the conflict is within themselves. Since ten was made with her in mind, they tend to operate very similarly and so they don't get in as many arguments as they did previously. Because again, ten exists from the changes made in nine. You cannot have one without the other,as they are the two sides of the same coin.
Another tid bit that must be mentioned is that 10's desire to be human can actually be traced back to 9's era. This is because the 9th doctor always made it a point to separate himself from Rose's family life. This is what causes him to have such a strained relationship with Jackie in the first place, because his refusal to take part in Rose's personal life directly interfered with Jackie's relationship to her daughter. Jackie does care for the Doctor. He is important to Rose and so she makes an effort to welcome him, even when he refuses.
But really from a few comments he makes off handedly in father's day, one can infer that the reason why he stays far away from their home life is more of a reflection of how he views himself. Like an outsider who cannot afford to get too close to the people around him.
After all he had this to say about the importance of living a life that is ordinary.
"i don't what this is all about, and I know we're not important -"
"who said you're not important? I've traveled to all sorts of places, done things you couldn't even imagine, but you two. Street corner, 2:00 in the morning, getting a taxi home. I've never had a life like that.."
You can't always trust the Doctor's words because he often puts on this unbothered front. But in this specific instance, he says this not as a means of diminishing it but rather being rather fond of the idea. To live the one adventure he could never have, sound familiar?
It's because of this that the 10th doctor makes an effort to be more involved in Rose's personal life. Extending his care towards her mother, and even spending the holidays with them. He even goes as far as to imply they were the closest thing to family when he tells Donna about it.
This long ass essay is all to essentially say that the idea of pitting ninerose, tenrose, and tentoorose against one another is rather pointless lol because they're all essentially the same ship but at different stages of their relationship. You cannot have the existence of one without the other because they all occupy the same man. All are equally valid according to the narrative and canon so please can we lay this useless competition to rest?
There's enough Rose to go around!
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