#i'm sorry that actually infuriates me
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how does one even get more traction when it comes to art
because i'm sick and tired and honestly ashamed(???) of my shitposts getting a lot of notes when i spend so much time and effort on actual fucking art. valuable things to post about
#and please don't tell me “make more art!” because i literally spend weeks working on ONE single piece#and it kind of pisses me off that my most popular posts are shitposts that i spent less than thirty minutes on#four hundred fucking notes. for a twisted wonderland shitpost.#i'm sorry that actually infuriates me#i'm not mad at anyone really. more so myself if that makes sense?#i just want attention and i know that sounds fucking stupid (probably because it is) but i put so much effort into the things i do#and not even my irls could give a shit#and i know this is how the internet works too and if you use that as an excuse for all the work i've put in for nothing i'm done#honestly#i'm so tired#genuine question
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ok hello i am!! alive!! but uhm. still in a strange spot mentally. so i'm adding today on to my little break and will try to be around tomorrow :x
#gonna try to knock myself out at a decent time tonight bc i NEED to fix my sleep schedule#waking up later and later in the day is making it harder and harder to convince my already stubborn & demand avoidant brain to Do Shit#i cannot will myself to focus on anything but burrowing as deeply as i can into my current hyperfixation and it is. kinda infuriating.#i think having more time in the day (& in actual daylight) will help. hopefully.#i've got some (possibly slightly expired) zzzquil. i've got sleepy time tea. i've got melatonin bath salts.#i will be trying all of these to force myself to sleep at a decent time tonight.#but for now........ i'm going to indulge my brain in the hyperfixation for one final day#sorry for being the worst person to write & plot with aksjfhdsl#━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ ooc ⋮ don't @ me.
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"student life" this "student life" that. girl I haven't been to a club in a year. haven't spoken to another student for longer than 10 minutes since the beginning of uni. haven't made plans with ABSOLUTELY ANYONE. everyone seems to get on well with each other and hang out together and everything and I have only spoken to 3 of my classmates in total. I'm living in my childhood home with my mom. thank you but I think I'll skip this "student life"
#i long to have an 8h workday and an apartment of my own. however small#and stop with all the studying amd exams and everything. i want to get home however late and not study. just watch a movie or read a book o#sth but i NEED to be free after let's say 7pm. just the workday ends and there is no more work. please. PLEASE#please let me escape this “student life” thank you#ramble tag#sorry for the vent i'm growing desperate#only just started and the thought of having to live this way in the span of 4 years is driving me insane🥰 i will work all day if i want to#also my mom's and dad's rants about our finances is infuriating... like cool get you but have you considered that 1) i want to help. maybe#let me? 2)my uni fee is actually incredibly low. i can pay it 6x working only 4h a day why do you have to talk about it all the time#“noo you shouldnt or we wont be able to pay the money for your education!!” girl i can pay it all in 3 months. fuck off#sorry for being so angry but what do they think they're doing?? do they assume i can't count???#anyway bye
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Do you have any Zhongli/Zhongchi fic recs? I haven’t found any that are nearly as good as yours 😔😔
funnily enough someone already asked this, but it was quite a while ago and tumblr is a mess to search old shit thru so here, this is the post this was asked during the ao3 crisis of- .......last year? i can't remember. either way, the post starts w me saying i don't have all the names and links but dw, after ao3 came back up i edited the post so you should see all authors and links in the recs.
i have to admit that for reasons unrelated to the fandom i haven't been reading many zhongchi fics as of late? so like- bear in mind i don't have an updated mental picture of any of the recs after the post was made. so if one went off the rails or if one of the WIPs finished, i'm not aware;; i also mention in the post that i'd add more recs if i had access to ao3 (which i didn't at the time bc it was down), and while that is true, it's been so long since i read any of them that i wouldn't be able to confidently reccomend them outside of 'i somewhat remember the plot and i remember liking it'. also i don't remember half of their names. so uh- yeah that's the list i think
#also there are plenty of fics that i'd have loved to recomend but that ended up either going off the rails towards the end or that just-#left me disappointed#complete tanget but what is it with people making holy angst and then completely missing the point of said angst#as in#the resolution they give to the angst is sometimes more infuriating than anything#like by that point i'm rooting to have no resolution LMAO#which is why angst resolution is always like my n°1 concern in my fics#last thing i want is for the angst to be super good and then for the resolution to leave y'all like-#that's it?#not in the sense of payoff for the angst#but in the way the issues brought up by the angst get handled#i don't want to point fingers obviously i'm not that much of an asshole#but i vividly remember a fic that set up childe being bullied horribly by a bunch of adults for something that was outside of his control#and that he couldn't have possibly known#and so he just flees bc i mean poor guy i'd flee as well. plus they backed him into a corner with no other way out#like- think public proposal except childe didn't even know he was dating zhongli. and when he was confused about it#all the onlookers started berating him for being stupid#which like- it's one thing being dense. and it's another thing being unable to communicate w eachother (this was zl's fault)#anyway. so he flees. the resolution to the angst is him getting dragged (against his will) back to liyue and zhongli just saying#sorry i forgot to say i loved you please never leave idk what i'd do without you#and like off-camera he did almost kill the 'onlookers' that bullied childe#but like#that's it#there's no further apologies from everyone; childe retains no issues from a highly traumatic event (it was portrayed that way);#everything is solved by zl saying actually i love you if you leave i'm gonna be depressed forever#like????????????????????????#obviously i'm being very vague about it#that's not exactly how it goes in the fic#don't want to throw hate at it the rest of it was really good#it just left me with a growing dread of 'this isn't going to be handled well by the author isn't it' as it went on
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it’s funny to me that larries [the ones that seem to care about this, if you don’t this is not for you keep scrolling] keep giving the time of the day to solo harries content creators when they outright want you gone so bad and treat you like the plague and yet content creators out here have to beg you all to give an ounce of support sometimes because you would rather reblog the big blogs content instead <3
#is it some humiliation kink or what?#i know some dont actually realize#but i feel like some are so blatantly obvious#without even checking#dont mind me#i just find infuriating because they act like that#but feed off all of your support on their shit#and pretend they dont see it#while still cursing you off#i'm too petty for this shit#i don't like this type of mistreatment#or mocking#i don't even do the solos dni interact bullshit myself#as long as you don't act like a goddamn weirdo for no reason you're good#i'm sorry i'm in a foul mood im blaming my late ass period#its all coming down to me along with shitty days over and over#so you get me complaining about silly things#[rant over]
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I fucking HATE how the fandom treats m.ine. it's so bad 😭
#ash rambles 💚#so many shitty takes... too much time on twitter ruins a man#i hear one more person call him a crazy obsessive yandere and i think I'm actually gonna lose it#he's either portrayed like that or as one half of a ship#his actual character is lost on so many people because oOoOOoOOooOoO mInE wAs GaY#i dont doubt that he likes men. it's just that I've seen so many people be weird about it-#also. it's not fucking sexy to wanna kill your partner. a bullet between the eyes isn't an act of love.#I saw a tweet today about how m.ine actually wanted to kill k.iryu because he thought d.aigo liked k.iryu romantically#and m.ine only wants d.aigo to himself. and THAT'S why m.ine wanted to kill k.iryu.#let that sink in. 😐.#i hate how the fandom treats him SO MUCH#i will sit in my corner here. and i will kiss m#m.ine. and we will kiss a lot. and things are good. we are happy. we are far away from all of that.#I'm not saying every fan of his is horrible. I've seen a lot of great stuff and content! but holy shit I've seen some horrible stuff too#and it's hard to not feel like I'm doing something wrong by shipping with him. by loving a guy who the world has always hated.#and ofc I'm not! but still! even whenever i rb content of him here I'm always so afraid ajdhajsj#like ah yes this is the day i finally get cancelled on tumblr dot com for (checks notes) ... shipping with y.oshitaka m.ine??#I'm honestly afraid to take him up to being an official f/o ajdhajsb i think he'll stay in crush jail a little while longer..#i hate how the fandom perceives him so much!!!!!!! i also just hate the y.akuza fandom in general lmao#i do also like k.iryu so.. I've seen shit 😐#I'll delete this later but oh boy i am in a mood#and i know this isnt the first time I've blogged about this#and for that i do apologize. but i really do love this guy and despite wanting to look for content of him i always end up finding the most#infuriating shit!#i know he's done fucked up things. he's not a great guy. but! our relationship is built on mutual trust and i will NEVER write any of that#creepy obsessive shit that the stupid fandom always portrays him as doing! he's not going to kill someone for getting too close to me-#I'm just... upset- get behind me honey! I'll shield you!#and by kissing him I'm not brushing over any of the shit he does in the game. yes he beheaded that guy. yeah he slapped that orphan.#but i adore him and omg i hit tag limit... oopsie daisy lol sorry guys 😭 I'm really sorry for always talking abt this#you were beautiful 💸
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it seems to me like eldest tries really hard to make it seem like arya has a lot of personality and complexity as a character and frankly it's not really working imho. like. there's a scene that really frustrates me. where we're told that she and eragon sit and talk about their families, their lives and whatnot, but that dialogue just. doesn't exist. how the hell am i supposed to see her as something other than a clear attempt from paolini to create "ideal woman who is so perfect and wonderful and yet will eventually fall for our protagonist"? give her some depth! make it make sense to me that eragon would be interested in her, aside from the fact that she's oh so beautiful. paolini makes him literally say to her that he cares about his friendship with her, but tbh i don't think any of us do either because their friendship has never been properly developed. most of the time it's eragon's inner monologue going "wow she's so pretty and wonderful and has such stealth and her figure and her hair and omg she'd never be with me :(" and her being mean to the dwarves or smth.
#fes rereads eldest#yea i'm sorry the way arya is written infuriates me#nasuada is allowed to be her own person as a character in a way that arya is not#and that's the tea#and tbh i kinda like that murtagh is all like 'oh she's just so clever and elegant' it feels like he's actually adding info#every time eragon starts praising arya on the other hand i'm a bit skeptical tbh#and i'm not the biggest murtagh and nasuada fan myself#i've accepted that's where we're going tho#but the whole arya thing... hopefully she'll get a bit more depth in brisingr... i think she did but i don't remember#she seems to me like the kinda character a teenage boy would write about as a 'fantasy' thing#oh....wait....hold on a minute....#i also just find the elves really pretentious and i can't really stand their holier-than-thou attitude#and arya has that all over#its clear to me paolini wanted to make the elves just wiser and more knowledgeable than anyone else#but he accidentally made them into self-righteous hypocrites#shit this post has turned into elf-slander#sorry :)#maybe i'll write a proper elf-slander post at some point#i think someone already wrote one that was absolutely wonderful and accurate but i can't really remembmer#anyway
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There's something so specifically infuriating when someone uses one of your experiences or your demographic in an argument, especially if said argument is about spreading hatred or is just so wrong. They "speak on behalf of the ___" to say such fucked shit.
"You're not thinking of the ___!"
"I literally am ___. You saying that adds nothing as you do not speak for me or for other ___. Shut up."
#I really really hate it. It angers me in such a specific way that just skldjf ksdl#...#vent below. idk. I'm really sorry#Mad rambles#Terfs will be like “oh think of survivors! 'MEN' can share women's spaces!” like shut the actual fuck up. SHUT UP. Shut your damn mouth#A terf is so much more dangerous than a trans person. Me. a tiny cis woman is so much more dangerous to a terf than a transperson is.#Because I will obliterate you. How dare you say you speak on MY behalf? As if I don't know what I'm fucking talking about.#as if you're “protecting me” by spewing such bullshit? by treating someone as a danger when they're not?!#Especially when they believe it's a fucking TRUMP CARD. Like mentioning it means they're right!!! when obviously they're not!!!#Or when they think the fact that I'm cis will make me agree with them! I'm cis simply because I am. I'm not better or worse because of it#being cis doesn't mean I'm fine with bullshit though!#I really hate feeling almost as if like...idk I'm “known” for talking about this but it's just so so infuriating. people will act like they#know when they don't. Obviously every experience is different and terfs who are survivors I hope you find peace and my heart goes out to yo#but you also need to get your fucking head outta your ass. Saying such things isn't the way to heal and you're hurting others with it.#It's NOT about hating men or trans people! the “men are always violent/women are always victims” mentality needs to fuck off#as if it's just the script of life and that it's inescapable no matter what. that it's the truth even if circumstances say otherwise.#...I'm going to possibly block the epic tag for a bit. I have the name of the saga blocked but like... It's just genuinely upsetting.#my story got picked apart too on how it wasn't actually that bad. that I'm actually the fucking worst. “Men are just like that sweetie”#BULLSHIT!!! Gender doesn't dictate a person's morals. Being good and kind does. It doesn't matter what form that takes!#not even saying HE'S good and kind as he's horrible and wonderful at the same time but about this stuff? Do what you want but#I DO think you're insane if you see it as otherwise and it makes me wanna lock my door. You're not a bad person probably but also 🙃#I get that there's history but there's also the fucking TEXT.#I don't know. I'm really sorry#tw trauma#tw sa mention#I'm not necessarily against reblogging this (I don't care) but don't post with tags. please
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my friend says atp the school is being negligent and i should report them which is probably true but also i mean. at least they clearly explained the process even if every part ogf it has gone wrong or gone on for far too long. and nobody has shown open contempt towards me during the process. unlike last time 😒. so are they being negligent possibly. butit could be worse & i . ohh my god thahnk you youtube autoplay for turning on alltoo well 10 minute version right now. i'm gonna go ruminate now.
#text#sorry i'm still bitter. hard to report when youre given literally no information about what doing so entails huh#like until this semester i thought it involved the police. nobody told me it didnt. nobody told me anything#this time it was 'bad enough' (flawed framework to view sa from i know i only act like this towards myself dont worry) that i knew i#had to do something & was willing to work with the police if it came to it/if the situation escalated#(<- not that i wanted to but my physical safety couldve been at risk)#but the fact that NOBDOY TOLD ME LAST TIME. that the cops aren't involved at all. THAT'S INSANE#like i'm pretty sure part of title ix (the law not the process) is that legally schools are REQUIRED to give you that information#that's so fucking infuriating. god.#ive posted about this before but- EVEN THOUGH THIS PROCESS SUCKS- it's helping me see how fucking bad last time was#bc i've learned my rights through it 😭 & experienced actual academic & social support and such#idk.#neg#🗒️
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little sapling
listen to the playlist here
(template 1) (template 2)
#ever after high#eah#cedar wood#pinocchio#OKAY THE THING IS#I saw a cedar playlist a while ago that positively infuriated me because it was.........let's say a bit lazy#but I thought 'hey maybe I can do better!' which was more proactive#(not like. objectively better. everyone has their own taste and I'm not here to bitch on other people's music interests)#so here it goes#feat. some actual italian songs bc I'm an actual italian and I know some#I'm SORRY I'm sorry but..............lana del rey thirsting after old men doesn't count ashgkjsgkafg#at least for me it doesn't
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IF YOU GUYS HAVE BEEN WONDERING WHERE I'VE BEEN;;
One. Hell™️ started for me.
TWO. I'VE BEEN GOOFING ON ROBLOX ON KP WITH FRIENDS AND GOING ON ABSOLUTE MURDER STREAKS.
So ya'll get Jose with Tricky's stop sign as a weapon.
#GOOFING#I'm also neutral on that game but GOD THE TRYHARDS CAN BE INFURIATING!!!!!!#LET ME COMPLETE STUFF!! PLEASE!!#Also since this game is another hyperfixation of mine you might expect art from it or at least related to it BAH#Did I forget my blog is actually multi-fandom (SO SORRY FOR PEOPLE THAT ONLY FOLLOW ME FOR PROJ. MOON RELATED STUFF)
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me: i will!!! get some writing done today!!!!
the Headache: oh? oh you thought? you thought that? oh i’m sorry what if i just stop you right there :)
me: >:(
#hush n shush wifi#not brainrot#agony (physical and mental)#i am so sorry my writing pace has slowed down i feel so bad#i will do my best to get more done today but then next week is going to be hellishly busy#maybe if i can't finish this full length fic i'll do some headcanons....#i feel like i'm starving you guys i'm sorryyyyy#half of my brain is consumed by Foul Legacy the other half is consumed by Limbus Company#and it leaves me -2 space to actually write this is infuriating >:(
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Last thing I expected to do today was spend 10 minutes arguing with my grandma over a cat that's been dead for nearly a decade and yet here we are
#I'm sorry but if the woman who took her in after we moved is saying that she spent ages treating her for chronic bronchitis#after you and mom decided to keep her on the balcony in all kinds of weather instead of looking after the kids#and making sure they don't provoce the cat not eat out of her bowl#then I'm sure as fuck gonna believe that over your assurances that a cat spending winters on an unheated balcony is fine. actually#'oh please what does Marina know??'#um. EVERYTHING??? again she's the one who treated the poor thing and managed her alive for another 4-5 years#I'm taking her word over someone who never gave a damn about animals. thank you very much#this is such a sore topic for me apparently. animal cruelty at its finest and it seems like no one cares#they all just think that my auntie is trying to make them look bad and it's actually her fault the cat was sick#this family is so fucking infuriating#stormcloud I am so so sorry. you deserved so much better than being adopted into this fucking family#at least Marina loved her. she and my uncle may not be saints but they are a step above my mom and grandma in my eyes#if for no other reason than them treating Stormcloud with some basic human decency#no idea where this rant came from. but I can't voice it to anyone else so I'm putting it here#I feel like I should write a poem or something#I've never done anything of the sort but apparently there are some unprocessed feelings here that I should probably work through#idk. we'll see. I have to make it home from grandma's first
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This is some shit Johnny would say, it just is I'm sorry.
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/7f493d87d136bf95fd1889aa70729a6d/cbe1149212537fb0-17/s540x810/18e235b091fbc3b4c0b017d21d67dd79b74c7c61.jpg)
Johnny hates your new boyfriend. It burns in his loins every time you come over and complain about something stupid the git said. So often that now when you take a particularly large sigh, he's immediately asking "fuckin' 'ell, what he do this time eh?"
It hurts even more when you gush about something "good" your boyfriend did, even when it's just the bare minimum. Yeah he opened the door for you on a date? Did you know that Johnny would have lifted up the globe had you asked him? Do you have any idea the things he would do if you so much as asked? No you didn't, because he was fairly certain you only saw him as your good friend, as you had been for years.
And Jesus did it infuriate him when you "laughed" your boyfriend's pitiful excuses for a joke. It wasn't your real laughter, it was a kind of controlled giggle. Johnny knew a couple words from him could have you full on belly laughing, gripping onto the nearest surface (usually his arm) to steady yourself. The worst part of it was, the sorry excuse of a man that had wormed his way into your life looked so proud of himself when you gave that fake laugh. Johnny wanted to wipe that grin off his face so bad. But he behaved himself, for you...most of the time, but this is Johnny we're talking about, he's nothing if not petty.
He pretends to like your sorry excuse of a boyfriend in front of you so that you invite him on your dates because you hope they can be friends. Johnny just wants to ruin things
When you make food, Johnny is there. Reminding your boyfriend he would never be the first person to try your recipes.
"Added some pepper since las' time aye lass?"
He then proceeds to taste test form the same spoon as you, side eyeing your "man".
And when you do serve the food, he eats 10x more than he usually does which is saying a lot for him. Just has to mention how many calories he's been burning at the gym lately. Does your boyfriend work out? Oh he doesn't? Hm, interesting.
Also the king of flirty jokes but turns it to 100 when he's around your new boyfriend.
"Jesus, you eat like a horse"
"Aye 's not the only thing about me thas' like a horse"
All said with that shit eating grin he knows pisses your boyfriend off.
Johnny knows this "relationship" (he refuses to believe you actually like the tadger) isn't going to last long anyway. He's the only person who could ever make you truly happy. The only person you'd wait for at the airport every time he got back from deployment. The only person you'd text out of no where at 3am to tell him you were hungry. He just had to help you see it was all and scare off your pathetic partner. If he couldn't manage it, he knew a couple big scary guys that could follow him home at night.
#the worms#they all have Scottish accents#johhny soap mactavish#soap x y/n#johnny soap mactavish#soap x you#soap x reader#soap smut#john soap mactavish#soap#soap mw2#john soap mctavish fluff#john soap mctavish x reader#soap call of duty#soap cod#johnny mactavish x reader#johnny mactavish#johnny x reader#johhny#tf141 x reader#tf 141 headcanons#tf 141 x reader#tf 141#cod mw2#cod x reader#cod headcanons#simon ghost riley x reader#kyle garrick x reader#captain john price#ghost x reader
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It actually infuriates me knowing how many Trump voters have never actual watched the news or read a news story and got all their info about the presidential election from social media and word of mouth. Like our government was decided mainly by people who have no fucking idea what's going on and now they're on social media like "I didn't know Trump wants to deport Mexicans, I'm Mexican and I voted for him 😧" and "Trump wants to get rid of social services but they're all that's keeping me alive, he betrayed his voters!!" like I'm sorry but maybe you should actually do a single fucking google search before voting for the goddamn PRESIDENT OF YOUR NATION.
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it is absolutely asinine the type of shitty, shitty products American specialty footwear companies will put on the market and boast about on their websites. like you fuckin idiots, your "top-of-the line quality!" boot has only 20 reviews on it and they all say that the damn things literally fall apart at the seams on the first or second wear!!!
#look i know tumblr isn't the place for this but I'm so fucking fed up with this bullshit. been trying to replace this wonderful pair of#hunting boots i had back in college for THREE YEARS NOW and i cannot for the life of me find anything even remotely sufficient#(that would actually fit me.......... looking at you men's footwear retail sizes 🙃🙃🙃🙃)#like legitimately all of it is either 1) total cheap garbage or 2) WAYY out of my price range#or 3) got some kind of vibrant pink or ''ooh look we made an Outdoor Product™ but for ✨ladies✨'' nonsense about it#OR 4) is from an otherwise reputable compwny but has the stupidest most non-ergonomic design in the world????????#for god knows what f-ing reason.#like seriously Irish Setter you've had that shoe design for 3+ YEARS NOW and you've been getting poor customer ratings on it the ENTIRE TIME#because it makes literally no sense to wrap the sole up around the boot and make the exact place that the shoe should *bend* with your foot#be stiff instead of fucking flexible???? like? news flash guys this is a fucking SHOE. you're supposed to WALK in it.#um. anyway.#sorry for this it just infuriates me and I'm so done. SO done.#I'm just gonna have to learn how to make my own goddamn shoes since no one else can do it right#shoulda followed my dad's footsteps (hah 😉) and gone into footwear
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