#i'm so mentally stable fr
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blackbonnet lyrics that make me scream, cry and throw up
And I think you should come live with me And we can be pirates Then you won't have to cry Or hide in the closet And just like a folk song Our love will be passed on
seven, taylor swift
It's fun and games until we both get hurt We play with fire 'cause we like the way it burns No use in patching up a sinking ship
ancient history, set it off
'Cause you could be the one that I love I could be the one that you dream of A message in a bottle is all I can do Standin' here, hopin' it gets to you You could be the one that I keep, and I I could be the reason you can't sleep at night A message in a bottle is all I can do Standin' here, hopin' it gets to you
message in a bottle, taylor swift
I bet you think I either moved on or hate you 'Cause each time you reach out, there's no reply I bet it never, ever occurred to you That I can't say hello to you and risk another goodbye
i almost do, taylor swift
I've been holding onto what was Siamese souls, you left, left I've seen every stage of grief I can over again Are you feeling whole again? Is this separation how it ends? 'Cause I've been holding onto what was Siamese souls, I'll live
siamese souls, yours truly
The waves crash in, the tide rolls out I stand before my weakness now You took my faith and cut me down The ocean it lies, it lies inside me now The ocean, the ocean
the ocean, tonight alive
I don't need the world to see That I've been the best I can be, but I don't think I could stand to be Where you don't see me
francis forever, mitski
I look up to the sky with salt in my eyes And the pain in my chest Holding me down as I'm washing away what you said But I won't be holding my breath
waves, tonight alive
God, keep my head above water Don't let me drown, it gets harder I'll meet you there at the altar As I fall down to my knees Don't let me drown, drown, drown Don't let me, don't let me, don’t let me drown
head above water, avril lavigne
(You tied the anchors to my ankles) (And you left me for dead)
wake up, crashing atlas
You believe me like a god I destroy you like I am I'm sorry I'm the one you love No one will ever love me like you again So, when you leave me, I should die I deserve it, don't I?
i'm your man, mitski
I should be crying, but I just can't let it show I should be hoping, but I can't stop thinking Of all the things I should've said That I never said All the things we should've done That we never did All the things I should've given But I didn't
this woman's work, kate bush
And I'm the idiot with the painted face In the corner, taking up space But when he walks in, I am loved, I am loved
me and my husband, mitski
the rest of my blackbonnet playlist
#yes this is supposed to be read like a story#i'm so mentally stable fr#feel free to reblog with more heartbreaking lines <3#blackbonnet#gentlebeard#stede bonnet#ed teach#ofmd spoilers#ofmd s2 spoilers#ofmd#our flag means death#sky.txt
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well that's fucking awesome. all of the damage russians have done to our electric infrastructure can be repaired in one year minimum. IT'S GONNA TAKE MORE TAHN ONE YEAR TO REPAIR ALL OF THE ELECTRIC STATIONS RUSSIANS HIT WITH THEIR MISSILES. AND WE AIN'T EVEN TALKING ABOUT CIVILIAN OR ANY OTHER INFRASTRUCTURE. ONLY ELECTRIC ONE. MORE THAN ONE YEAR. AND WE ARE STILL NOT STRUGGLING ENOUGH IN ONLINE PEOPLE'S OPINION. FUCK OFF
#like look I'm just a guy who fucking wants to relax on my summer break and enjoy the last months of being unemployed and careless#and all I fucking get is “the electricity will soon be out” notification on my phone#LIKE OKAY I FUCKING GET YOU YOU ARE USED TO US FUCKING STRUGGLING AND I MAY BE SEEN BYPER PRIVILEGED FOR COMPLAINING#BUT IT'S SO FUCKING EASY TO JUDGE SOMEONE WHILE YOU FUCKING HAVE EVERYTHING I CAN EVER DREAM OF (basic human needs)#like YES THERE'S AN ONGOING WAR IN MY COUNTRY AND I KNOW IT. BUT WE DIDN'T CHOSE TO LIVE NEXT TO FUCKING RUSSIA#we just want to live safely and have access to the most basic things that many people all around the world take for granted#we want to feel safe on our land#we want to stop fucking worrying that the next building hit by russian missile will actually be ours because no one is safe#and still I fucking see those fuckos online telling me how we “don't act like people who live in a country that goes through a war”#well I guess in that case we should all stop buying food and clothes to be REAL people who are suffering from a war#like you for real?? you gonna fucking make us give up the only sourse of distraction and dopamine we can get?#you fucking judging people for buying stuff because “you shouldn't buy new things#there's an ongoing war in your country“ you fr?? so like what we all shall fucking give up and die??#buying new things often gives people some dopamine which actually helps to stay somehow stable (as sane as it's possible)#or do you want us to be a fucking nut-state? idk some mental-case-state. fuck off#stand with ukraine#russia is a terrorist state
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Okay so I have an idea
I feel like Siffrin would almost always wear their cloak thing (as seen in the game)
And always wearing it could be kinda symbolism for how Siffrin doesn't want to move on and doesn't want things to change. He wants the same familiarity and comfort in his life to be consistent and never falter or change.
But for loop in SASASAAP I feel like (because of their silhouette body shape thing in ISAT being less of a big baggy cloak and more of a clearly human like silhouette) Loop would take off their cloak more often, because they feel suffocated in it.
And they search for change.
To BEAT the king.
To have their victory.
To have ANYTHING change.
Anyways I'm like so normal about this name
#me when i ramble about my headcanons#isat#in stars and time#isat siffrin#loop isat#headcanons#because I'm so mentally stable#fr
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I'm actually going to gnaw my own hand off.
#FICTIONAL BLONDE MAN HAS ME IN A VICE GRIP I AM NOT OKAY#THIS IS NOT ENJOYMENT THIS IS MY BRAIN GOING ASUHDNJHGJSHMAIKJDGMDKJMAKSDFKMLJSMGKJKJSMLKJSDHGKMJSHFLKADDKSGJMLSKJGSKHLGJM#like I am going to eat my own LIMBS he is giving me MENTAL ILLNESS I DIDNT KNOW I HAD IN ME#I AM CAPTIVATED BY HIS SWAGLESS LOOKS AND CRINGEFAIL PERSONALITY HE IS EATING MY BRAIN#he is going to give me HEART PALPITATIONS.#I need to kill him. violently. but also give him a hug. but first kill him violently.#hE'S JUST LIKE ME FR AND IT IS TELLING ME THINGS ABOUT MYSELF I DIDNT WANT TO KNOW#I've never wanted to strange someone so badly before and that's saying a lot.#LIKE I LOVE HIM. BUT I ALSO DESPISE HIM WITH EVERY FIBER OF MY BEING I NEED HIM TO BE DEAD.#BUT I LOVE HIM I need him to get cuddles :(#but also I need to stab him repeatedly.#I need him and his boyfriend to be happy but I also need them to kill each other.#WHEN IM PLAYING WITH FICTIONAL CHARACTERS LIKE FUCKED UP BARBIES I DIDNT THINK THEYD START FIGHTING BACK#if any of my irl friends see this I promise I'm so stable and I'm so normal and I'll shut up about him. but like only irl.#I HAVE NOT HAD BRAINROT THIS BAD SINCE I FIRST DISCOVERED FSA AND LOZ.#this might be WORSE. THIS FEELS WORSE.#this might force me to WRITE AGAIN.#hhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#IM GOING TO BITE SOMETHING. HARD.#really glad I stalled on getting into this fandom for three years I don't think I could've handled the level of ALL CONSUMING DISEASE#that this man has inflicted upon me.#ahem#anyways#raven rambles
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honestly i'm really glad i only just found out about the panic! at the disco live in denver show last night because i really should've known about it in middle school but if i had i know i would've been the most insufferable person ever about it
#rys.txt#i haven't even seen the full thing yet#i was just looking for the source of the ryan ross “well i'm afraid that i” clip so i've just seen the karma police cover#they ate that shit up honestly. like i genuinely like it better than the original. how the fuck did they do that#pre-split panic! was on another level entirely what the fuck happened#this definitely did something to my brain chemistry fr#i know if i saw this thing in middle school i would've never shut the fuck up about it#i'm lowkey scared to watch the whole thing because i think camisado might straight-up just kill me. mecore song of all time#i think the amount of panic! songs i listen to on a consistent basis at any given time is a good reflection of how mentally stable i am#my guys i am fucking struggling again 👍 yippee!!
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not to seem apathetic but currently adopting the willfully blind "my kid is too good for anyone" mentality that delusional parents have sometimes but atp like. get a job get ur feelings in order be emotionally available before u even LOOK at my child. tired of miscommunication i just want to see them be pampered and spoiled and wooed right NOW!
#steve harrington#yeah. like blah blah nuance#but the specific itch rn is FLUFF#i need something so sweet my teeth just fall right out#am i like on the wrong side of ao3 or smth#why is it always steve harrington whump#i LOVE steve harrington whump#but not right now i'm not mentally stable#princess steve harrington right NOW#u better be kneeling at his feet fr
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Request: dazai x reader who is the opposite of him in every way possible (aka mentally stable and very very very introverted)
Can be fluff or angst or anything you want
𝐇𝐢𝐬 𝐨𝐩𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐞<3
𝐅𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 : 𝐃𝐚𝐳𝐚𝐢 𝐎𝐬𝐚𝐦𝐮
𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: fluff ( ? ) , romance
𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭:
𝐀/𝐧: I'm back fr💀 sorry for the wait!
Dazai is constantly amazed by your ability to stay calm and composed in any situation. You could be surrounded by a group of angry yakuza members and still maintain your poker face while Dazai is busy making jokes and trying to talk his way out of trouble.
Dazai loves to drag you out of your introverted shell and into the spotlight, whether it's by forcing you to go to a crowded party or making you perform karaoke in front of a bar full of people. You always resist at first, but secretly enjoy the rush of adrenaline it gives you.
Despite your vastly different personalities, you and Dazai have a deep understanding of each other. You're the calm to his chaos, and he's the light to your darkness.
Dazai loves to make you laugh, but sometimes his jokes can be a little too much for your introverted sensibilities. He once convinced you to join him on a rollercoaster, only for you to spend the entire ride gripping the safety bar with white knuckles while Dazai laughed maniacally.
You often find yourself wondering how Dazai can be so flirty and outgoing, while you struggle to make small talk with strangers. But Dazai assures you that he secretly envies your ability to be content with quiet moments and solitude.
You're not a big fan of Dazai's love for dramatics and theatrics, but you secretly enjoy watching him put on a show. You once caught him practicing his dramatic monologues in front of a mirror, and couldn't help but laugh at the sight.
Dazai loves to surprise you with spontaneous adventures, but sometimes his ideas can be a little too wild for your taste. One time he convinced you to go bungee jumping, and you spent the entire time screaming and regretting your decision.
Dazai is always amazed by your ability to listen and understand people on a deeper level. While he often jokes about his own emotional instability, he secretly admires your emotional intelligence and empathy.
Despite being polar opposites, you and Dazai have a strong connection that transcends your differences. You often find yourself gravitating towards each other, even when you're in a room full of people.
Dazai loves to push your boundaries, but he always respects your boundaries and never forces you to do anything you're not comfortable with. You once caught him trying to sneak you into a crowded party, but he quickly backed off when you told him you weren't feeling up to it.
You're not a big fan of Dazai's constant need for attention, but you secretly enjoy the way he brings out your more adventurous side. You once convinced him to go on a quiet nature walk with you, and he ended up having the time of his life.
Despite being opposites in every way, you and Dazai have a unique and special relationship. You complement each other in ways that no one else could, and you both bring out the best in each other (even if Dazai's definition of "best" is a little questionable at times).
𝐒𝐜𝐞𝐧𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐨 :
Dazai and you were sitting in the agency's office, working on paperwork. You had your head down, intently focused on the task at hand, while Dazai was lazily doodling on his own papers. You couldn't help but notice how different the two of you were. While Dazai was always cracking jokes and making sarcastic comments, you preferred to keep to yourself and avoid drawing attention to yourself.
Suddenly, Dazai let out a loud chuckle, causing you to jump in your seat. "What's so funny?" you asked, raising an eyebrow.
Dazai looked up at you, his eyes sparkling with amusement. "I was just thinking about how different we are," he said with a grin. "I mean, you're all quiet and introverted, while I'm over here making jokes and flirting with anything that moves."
You rolled your eyes, but couldn't help the small smile that tugged at the corners of your lips. "Yeah, we're pretty much opposites," you agreed.
Dazai leaned closer to you, his grin turning mischievous. "But you know what they say, opposites attract," he said, winking at you.
You couldn't help but blush at Dazai's flirtatious comment, but you quickly regained your composure. "I highly doubt that," you said with a small smile.
Dazai chuckled, leaning back in his chair. "We'll see about that," he said with a smirk. "I have a feeling I can charm even the most introverted of souls."
You rolled your eyes again, but couldn't deny the warmth that spread through your chest at Dazai's words.
Dazai continued to tease you throughout the day, making little jokes and comments here and there about your quiet nature. You tried your best to ignore him and focus on your work, but every time he made a comment, it made your heart race just a little bit faster.
As the day went on, Dazai seemed to be getting bolder with his teasing. He would lean in close to you when he spoke, his breath warm against your skin. He would make suggestive comments about how quiet you were in bed, or how he bet he could make you scream if he really tried.
You would always roll your eyes or give him a sharp retort, but secretly, you couldn't help but feel a little bit flustered by his teasing. It was like he was trying to get a rise out of you, to see just how much he could push your buttons.
Finally, after a particularly suggestive comment from Dazai, you couldn't take it anymore. You turned to him, your face flushed with a mixture of embarrassment and irritation. "What's your deal, Dazai?" you asked, your voice slightly shaking.
Dazai's smirk widened as he leaned even closer to you. "My deal? Why, nothing at all, my dear," he said, his voice low and smooth. "I just can't resist teasing someone as cute and introverted as you."
You scoffed, trying to hide the fact that his words had sent a shiver down your spine. "You're impossible," you muttered, turning back to your work.
Dazai chuckled, leaning back in his chair once again. "Oh, come on now, don't be like that," he said, still grinning. "I'm just having a bit of fun. And who knows, maybe one day you'll even start to enjoy it."
You rolled your eyes, but secretly, you couldn't help but wonder if he was right. Maybe, just maybe, there was a part of you that enjoyed the way he teased you, the way he pushed your boundaries and made you feel things you never thought you would feel.
As you continued to work side by side with Dazai, you couldn't help but feel a strange sense of excitement building in your chest. Maybe being opposites wasn't so bad after all.
Do Not Copy or Plagiarize Any of My Works. Reblogs Are Very Appreciated.
#bsd#bungo stray dogs#bsd imagines#bsd fanfic#bungo stray dogs x reader#bsd x reader#dazai osamu x reader#dazai x you#bsd dazai#dazai x reader#bsd headcanons#bsd fluff#dazai fluff
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i might be overstepping but from your tags you seem completely miserable in your relationship. i know you said things are fine but from my outside perspective as someone who doesn't know you, you do not seem happy at all. and if you're desiring other women that's a huge red flag. it means you're already checked out on some level, even if you're not physically being disloyal to her. i think you know this isn't going anywhere and you know it's going to end so i would prepare for that mentally now
You're not overstepping. I appreciate the honesty, and I've been thinking about this a lot and talking about it ad nauseum with a multitude of friends.
I have to disagree with you saying that I'm completely miserable. That's a bit harsh. I'm going to see her next Thursday and I'm excited about it. I don't think that's indicative of misery at all. I do think I'm fairly unhappy tho. And I unfortunately agree that I'm at least partially checked out of the relationship. Outside of desiring other women, I've noticed I don't really tell her things. I'm not saying I keep secrets, but if something is on my mind, she's not the first person I want to tell. I always go to someone else.
It's just difficult because we do have a stable relationship. We don't fight. We've never had a huge fight in almost 5 years. Like. That's a very long time to consistently be on good terms with someone. It doesn't feel like we ever really left the "honeymoon phase." We have always been extremely sweet to each other and in tune. I always thought that people break up after a lot of anger and nastiness. I never really considered that things could just kinda... Fizzle out?
The worst thing about all of this is that if she cane out tomorrow, I genuinely believe all of our problems would be gone. Her family is very tightly knit. If they accepted me, I could actually spend time with them and get to know them and stuff. I can deal with long distance just fine, but I can't deal with feeling isolated lmao.
And I worry so deeply about her telling her family. Her being gay is one thing, but how on earth is she gonna say she's been in a relationship for 5 whole years? I don't think any parent would take such a strong lie well. Like. Her mother is gonna think back on all the times she's been with me and realize just how much her kid has been lying to her over the years.
It's just insane.
My issue is I worry about if we have a future. We're both gonna graduate soon. How is she gonna move in with me if she's not out? How is that going to go down? She should have come out ages ago because now I feel like we're stuck lmao. Her mother and father are gonna have a LOT to deal with extremely quickly and the longer she waits, the worse it's gonna get. I'd feel better if she had a concrete date of coming out, but she doesn't lmao. I feel like I'm being strung along to a dead end.
And it's awful because I really do feel like we have an extremely good relationship. You can't imagine how elated I was before we went long distance. I had to have been the happiest dyke in the world, fr. But the trouble is we're not kids anymore and I want to talk about actually living together and getting married. I don't just want to muse to her about it anymore. I want to be with someone who is out and I can buy an apartment with and all of that. Being a closet case if fine when you're a kid, but eventually you have to just grow up fr lmao.
#And yea I notice that I want to be free to flirt around with other women#I'd literally never cheat no matter what#But I constantly wonder about how nice it'd be to just be single#Oh well#Somebody send me an ask on the 15th to inquire about the status of my relationship#Cause that day is going to be extremely defining
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I'm. Gonna be so fr I personally don't ship Jane with anyone
Like yeah some pairings are cute but like
She is constantly going through an existential crisis and is in constant mental anguish
I don't think she'd be too stable in any relationship especially with how she doesnt even know who she is☹️
(Don't let me stop you from shipping though this is jst my opinion on it)
~~
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sorry for the #UKthings rant but ive gone private for mental health stuff but are trying to get my foot in the door with public stuff because i cant afford mental health over stuff like, having food to eat, but ohhhh my god. nhs please. next week will be week five of an eight week deal (maybe some kind of assessment? i'm not sure what the exact point is) where i have a meeting with a mental health nurse and there is nothing more demoralizing on my journey to more stable mental health than hearing from her that all it seems i do is push people away and reject help. i'm sorry that saying that i dont think downloading an app is going to help me!! especially since i've already got one that i have been using. lol. i've tried to determine what it is she can actually do to help me because i feel like this whole thing is wasting both of our times but all i really get is "well i'm a mental health nurse not a psychiatrist so i can't help with that" OKAY !!!!! what CAN you do!!!! god. god . chloe do you know what a mental health nurse's role is? do any of your followers know??? how am i meant to work with her best rn i really dont know...
omg no honestly i could go on about this FOREVER!!!! but for ur sanity i won't. i'm so so sorry they're messing you around like this when it comes to something as serious as your health - i've had very similiar experiences and honestly at this point i see our healthcare system as nothing but a cardboard charade rather than a system that seeks to provide genuine support to people but that's a whole other thing. i'm on like a million waiting lists for various different things and i think if i do end up getting through to someone it is very much going to mirror your experience i.e dull platitudes and empty promises. they expect you to download a mediation app and get over severe mental illness and the fact that you're struggling with that is truly reflective of them and the state of the country - not you or your ability to heal/get over things/whatever other bullshit expectation they force onto us. i haven't worked with a mental health nurse since i was like 17 for this exact reason like they do not offer the consistent, in-depth and intensive help a lot of us need and their answer to everything is to try yoga or drink more water and it's like, how are you even SUPPOSED to work with that?? one thing i will say is that venting to these people and just letting that be their position in your life - to let you get off some steam - is somewhat helpful but obviously doesn't confront the underlying issues. through this she may come to understand that you showing up to these frustrating sessions and talking IS you trying, is proof of you not "rejecting help." it's wild she would even imply that honestly. i genuinely hope you find a treatment plan that actually does delve into why you feel this way and what you can proactively do about it - which you do deserve, but i know it's not super realistic to think that the nhs in its current state is going to provide you with. it sucks and it feels so fucking hopeless, i've never even entertained the idea of getting serious help for yrs because of this and i totally get it. if you need a friend or someone to talk to about this, please don't hesitate to send me a message fr. i feel like we're in super similar positions rn and it truly is its own type of hell. x
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hooghhh talked to one of my close long-term friends yesterday about my stupid fucking life and got some really good insight and like. general direction. that's helping me put shit into perspective / next steps which is what i desperately need lol mulling it over it makes sense that like. yeah. it's gonna suck to put my attempts at rebuilding an irl social life / attempting to date on hold til i'm back in school. but it's what I *need* to do. bc at the moment i'm so deeply burnt out mentally and emotionally that my attempts are going to fall flat. I have to address my life and sort of go into 'survival' / preservation for a while until I can quit my current job that's killing me I also didn't realize this until they pointed it out but I do unfortunately attract a 'type'. and it's 'fixer-uppers'. which is like. yeah no shit I don't feel emotionally fulfilled at any of my romantic endeavor attempts, I'm pouring in energy and emotional support to someone who is incapable of returning those things. I have to sort of 'screen' and set my standards / boundaries higher, and find someone whose emotional, mental, and financial stability can go on par w/ mine. I'm putting this shit on hold until I'm back in school. because fucking yikes. my touch-starved ass was excusing way too many red flags from people ive attempted to date. the reason I feel so demoralized & pained by my attempts is because I tend to attract emotionally & mentally unstable bottoms like moths to a flame, and i'm now realizing that isn't a joke anymore. thats my reality. lol my most recent dating attempt kinda. unfortunately confirms this. they weren't financially, emotionally, or mentally stable (and they admitted this to me a few different times) and of course as usual I went into "oh let me help you!! I have experience and I care for you!!" mode and. yeah. I can't fucking 'fix' people. I can't do this anymore. I don't want to do this anymore. the person mentioned above abruptly ghosted me and didn't say why. and I know they have a lot of untreated mental health shit going on, but that doesn't excuse ghosting someone you've been seeing / talking to for over a month. it never does. you need to be an adult and at the bare minimum say "hey my feelings have changed, i'm sorry, good luck". it's not that hard fr. anyways. I at least have a path forward and I'm able to identify things with my dating woes which is... frankly incredibly helpful and my life is feeling way less out of control 👍 thank fuck
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15 questions for 15 (or so!) friends!
tagged by @euphcme!! ty cleo!!
are you named after anyone? nah, my parents just flipped through a baby book until they found a name they agreed on. i was close to being named taylor, but ultimately they decided against it because then my initials would be the same as my siblings and they wanted us to be easily distinguishable by just initials. for my middle name, which i won't say what it is cuz it's not a typical "middle name", my mom said she just chose one that was more traditional to kind of offset the more trendy first name. that way, if i grew up and didn't like how popular haley was, i could go by my middle name instead
when was the last time you cried? i have a goldfish memory so i have no idea, but it was surely this week and probably over something really dumb like i stubbed my toe or read a sad fanfic honestly.... it luckily Has Not Been That Serious for me lately (knock on wood), so no big reasons to cry and just silly ones and for this i am very grateful!!
do you have kids? i am not mentally stable or financially secure enough for a child rn, but i do think i might want them later on (esp if i find a loving partner who agrees). i personally think that, at 25, i am too young to have kids (i know people my age are parents, but it completely baffles and scares me), so it's not something i'm gonna put too much thought into until i'm in my 30s. 30 is also, coincidentally, the age i'll be when my iud expires (unless the fda approves it for longer), so i am fully Not Worrying About It Yet 😌 thats for future haley to hem and haw about. current haley is vibing with 0 responsibilities over other living breathing human beings
what sport do you play / have played? i have never actually played a sport... my parents made me try so many when i was a kid, but i would literally throw fits and scream until they let me quit. i did play recreational tennis for a little bit and i always want to go back to it cuz i still have the racquet, but i don't currently have anyone to play with!
do you use sarcasm? absolutely. it became a problem at work (reported to HR cuz someone thought i was serious), so i have to really try and contain myself in professional settings 🙃
what's the first thing you notice about people? hair! then style/fashion, demeanor, and general age range. if they're in my age range and i'm otherwise attracted to them, the very next thing i always check is their hands bc i lovveeeeeee hands (rings, tattoos, nail polish 🤍)
what's your eye color? like a denim blue/gray with green/gold/hazel central heterochromia (prev also has CH which is very cool, hey twin!)
scary movies or happy endings? 90% of all media i consume has a happy ending and i rarely watch scary movies except at halloween, so happy endings!! give me that HEA or give me death!!!!
any talents? oversharing and never shutting the fuck up or being able to read a room 🤍 no but fr, i can play the flute if i choose to (which i rarely do bc i live in an apartment and do not want my neighbors to Crucify Me). i also embroider/cross stitch, but that may be more of a hobby? i do write very well, and i love it so so so much, but finding motivation and time is nearly impossible for me lately. i have absolutely been having a quarter life crisis about the fact that i am neglecting almost every creative outlet in my life due to burnout - would love to get back to it and learn how to sew since i need to learn how to alter my clothing as off-the-rack does not fit nor flatter my body... tall chubby girl problems frfr
where were you born? take a map of the usa, put a pin in a place you would never want to go, and you're probably semi-close!
what are your hobbies? reading and listening to music are the biggies. if i have any downtime at all, i will usually be reading. i cancelled all my streaming services bc i literally was not using them since i'm always reading instead... libby app and my kindle are my beloveds 🤍 and for music, i literally netted like... 190,000+ minutes on my spotify wrapped last yr bc the only times im NOT listening to music are when im sleeping or if im doing something that prevents me from listening to music (like a meeting at work where i have to actively participate). i also like to build lego sets! but i don't have room for any more of them tbh my apartment is FULL up on stuff since it's soooo tiny and i took in a lot of my grandma's stuff after she died since i couldn't bear parting with it, so i have 0 room now. next time i want to build one, i'll just have to take apart and then redo one instead of get a new one
do you have any pets? unfortunately no, but i would love a cat! a little afraid to get one for two reasons tho. 1) i have never Had a pet before and am afraid of doing wrong by the little baby, and 2) i Was attacked by a cat a few years ago and am still a little afraid of them. i have a friend whose cat is VERY aggressive (lots of biting, scratching, jumping on and attacking them) and i would not do well with a cat like that and would want a more mellow cat (they can playfight with me occasionally of course, but i could not deal with the near-constant attacking my friend endures. it would absolutely freak me out). but, since you can't really know a cats personality until you get them home and acclimated to the new environment and owner, there's no guarantee i wouldn't get a cat i'd be afraid of, so i've held off on adopting for now. i keep hoping i will get blessed by the cat distribution system and they will give me a cat they know will mesh with me, since i know cats like that exist. my siblings cat is literally the sweetest baby and has never hurt, scratched, bit, or attacked them before and just snuggles or ignores them and that is the kind of cat i would need. @ the universe..... please....
how tall are you? 5'8.5/174cm almost exactly. if i'm talking to a man, i round down and tell him i'm 5'8 but if i'm talking to a woman i round up and say i'm 5'9 (gotta impress the ladies with my height, gotta humble the 5'10 man who said he's 6'0 and is now upset he's so close in height to me when i'm 5'8)
favorite subject in school? english, science, and history! but i was a total nerd and loved every class tbh
dream job? novel writer! but writing is so difficult for me lately since my job is so draining of all my time and mental energy that even when i have free time, i can't bring myself to do anything other than rot or read and listen to music. but, i can't quit my job to write bc i cant afford to live w/o my job, so for the time being, my bestselling debut novel that will get a movie deal and change my life for the better, making me vastly wealthy and enabling me to continue writing at my leisure, is still stuck inside my head
I truly cannot think of 15 people to tag in this cuz it is very, very late and i am very, very tired but i will tag.... 3 people rn and edit it if i think of more later!! no hard feelings if you don't want to do this, but i'd love to read your responses if you do 🤍
@lastparty @ratatouiile @lvagirl
#🤍#i love talking about myself and oversharing on the internet tbh its a problem#give me a tag game that asks for my ssn next and i may just give it to you#tag games
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//SL fandom thoughts:
Okay so everyone is aware that Solo Leveling is getting both game and animated series adaptations, right? I'm genuinely happy abt it since we're all getting fed but I'm also very anxious abt the fandom.
I actually don't interact with the fandom that much. There's really only one person in my inbox who is making my tumblr feed chaos((sideeyes but dont stop pls/gen dont ur the only one i talk to in this fandom)). Because genuinely, I'm scared of other fans since I'm a Jinwoo Yumejoshi (Girl who self ships/ships ocs //i fall more into oc x canon part// with canon characters) and it scares me to get jumped on since i'm aware he's canonically married man and a father WhEEZE.
While nothing can justify that I hope people remember it's still just fiction and if they don't want to see it they should just hit the block button.
Yume-ing is a way of comfort. And I know there's gonna be a trend of Jinwoo Yumes in the future because it happens in every fandom and I just genuinely hope the upcoming new fans be respectful of those ppl((press x to doubt this is the internet after all whEEzE)).
I'm both excited and scared of Solo Leveling becoming one of the mainstream fandoms. I just hope it has more healthy than toxic since toxicity is a thing that always comes in every fandom.
I hope in the future I meet fellow Jinwoo Yume babies((and even side characs yumes and....Shadowyumes. Yes. I know you igris, bellion and beru fckers exist somewhere)).
Solo Leveling is genuinely an amazing story and Jinwoo as a character is as amazing himself. No matter how mainstream the manhwa fandom says he is— He is fr my comfort character. He keeps my mental health stable and upbeat.
So I genuinely hope the fandom grows i na good way. And also make new sl friends I want to be friends with other Jinwoo fans even tho im shy whEEzE
#solo leveling fandom#just random thoughts rlly#i want to see other Jinwoo yumes#Idk i just feel lonely in this fandom sometimes#whEEzE#but genuinely i want to see Jinwoo yumes#and shadow yumes#just dont talk abt their pps pls#like no pls dont mention it#i will welcome you all lets just not talk abt their pps
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Reasons why I think u should b mine!!
(This is a joke pls don't kill me pls)
ur cute
I'm cute
ur charming, very rizztastic
ur fics so good fr
I can 100% absolutely help you vent out stress (therapist rizz)
I can kick people's nuts easily (for u)
i play the electric guitar
very mentally stable (real)
so kind fr
great humour (pls believe)
ur so perfect fr
very smart
so intelligent
v charming (so real)
that's not all but my hands hurt from playing guitar lmao
-anon that you forgor
LMFAO THERAPIST RIZZ
you had me at electric guitar
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I actually settled on Rider last time someone brought up the question of 'which Fate/Stay Night character would you date'
Which is probably kinda surprising for anyone that knows me but looking at it from a rational and realistic point of view there are some upsides
- an actual adult
- relatively mentally stable
- similar interests (reading)
- introverted and emotionally independent (just like me fr)
- i'm taller than her so she won't feel as insecure about her height
Of course I don't think you're supposed to write up a whole list instead of just picking someone that you, y'know, actually like
But I could imagine getting along with her at least
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celia, arikado, leon, sara for the bingo 👁️👁️
Celia
Oh what a mess of a woman. I know it's more of a writing flaw but i adore how she switches between being a threatening villain to the most incompetent moron ever (seriously girl you fake murder Dracula's reimcarnation's crush and you expect him to not instantly murder you? Fr?). Plus depending on the source she either is legit indoctrinated in her cult's beliefs which gives her a sad facet or she has the more selfish purpose of preserving her own dark magic (and what do i say? I can make both work. I think). Plus the way it can be implied that she might have contact n even collaboration w Arikado makes it better (sorry for the ppl reading this but yes it works i swear im not insane). Go silly gal go! Play Machiavellian schemes with the literal son of the dark lord and underestimate your enemy!
Arikado
Oh boi and talking abt Arikado; the common idea of a grown up n stable Alucard finding stability after "ending" the cycle is fine and all, but the implication from his AoS n DoS behaviour that he is in a terrible mental state and unable to let go of the cycle? Beautiful. Amazing. Need me more of that. He's this beautiful mini reflection of the revenge cycle, and after living through it, with the goal of murdering his own father, for so long, and having it as his sole purpose, it has devoured him n broken him. And he now wants to take control of it with his own hands, is showing both the worst behaviour of both his father AND the Belmonts (haha SotN parallels w Richter) and might end up making matters worse :) (I blame you for indoctrinating me into the neg character arc Alu, thank u) Anyways someone force this poor moron to take vacations before he loses it
Leon
THE HIM. MY BABY BOI. I love his honor n morals and how he chooses them in the face of great suffering. His bravery and impulsiveness. How he's sassy can fall into black n white thinking. How loyal he is to those close to him and how much he cares. The balance between his own feeling n his morals. The parallels w Mathias n Sara n Rinaldo. And just hmmmgjsgkwkgd my poor boi
I can't decide if i want him to recover from the LoI events or if I want him to be consumed by his traumas and thirst for revenge but in any case he goes into the blender *puts him into a sock w stones and smacks him against the walls multiple times*
Also, salt warning here but i feel like fandom either exaggerates his neg traits and acts like Mathias descent into madness ("hello church can i abandon our very important military campaign to be at home w my best friend. He needs cuddles n emotional support that will surely fix him. No it's not gay dont worry. Thanks :)"), Sara getting sealed into the VK (which she insisted on and convinced him despite his initial refusal) n the Belmont clan's burden (he did got them into monster hunting w the whip but there's no way he knew how bad things were gonna get) were all 100% his very well informed fault; Or makes him into an idiot sunshine boi who doesn't knows what death is (he's an undefeated warrior with a who knows how large body count) can't think or lead (he maintained the company undefeated during Mathias' illness) and a perfect innocent n easy to manipulate uke for his sexy older seme (I'm not saying they canonically fucked you can perfectly interpret their relationship as 100% platonic or having something but deciding to respect their girls or etc etc. But if they did the nasty then he had to rail Mathias at least a couple of times). I admit im veeery biased and picky regarding this balance but still. He has facets i say
Sara
Yes my anger girl. Let her commit crimes. I wanna write a post abt her but to resume i love her as a symbol of destroyed innocence (ha). A sweet gal who did helped everyone and was good n nice and disliked violence only to have her life ruined in so many ways that her inner frustration blooms into a divine wrath n bloodthirst. Like i said before I adore her relationship w Leon and how they made eachother better n then worse :). Plus, the manual describes her as strong hearted! She obviously loved Leon n was happy to see him! sacrificed her life in order to not turn into a vampire and instead stop Walter from harming more innocents! She has agency and her choice was crucial not only for Mathias convoluted plan but for the whole cycle. (Ppl stop forcing the "boring 100% sweet harmless never angry gal who always got dragged around by men as an object" archetype on her challenge. Yes i used to be like that but i got gud. If i can recover so others can)
And then she had to see how Mathias betrayed her n Leon and then tried to take him, and dealt w the mess that post-canon Leon was, both together but separated, furious and crushed on the other's behalf, until his death :). AND then she had to wait hundreds of years to avenge him only to have to kill the same bastard over and over and over again. Mix in vampire corruption and you have a caring but toxic Belmont Matriarch/Whip stuck in the cycle. So yea let her have negative emotions and commit crimes (Sorry John).
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