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haliteatiger · 7 months ago

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Happy Werewolf Wednesday, ya'll! We're serving up a big pot of tea tonight so get those cups ready!

Special thanks to Blackbackedjackal and King for their help in putting this together, editing, and especially to Jackal for being so supportive and encouraging. I'm very much not normally the type to do call-out posts, but people need to be aware of Dogblud, as she has hurt, not only myself, but quite a few others as well, and seems to have somehow gotten away with behaving like this for 20-odd years. I'm of the mind she shouldn't be allowed to do so any more, hence this post.

TL;DR - Beware of Dogblud, aka Ashryn, aka DogofBlud, aka ThatDogMagic. Very, very long post under the cut.

With everything happening with DogBlud and Blackbackedjackal's studio, I felt emboldened to come forward with my own experiences with her. This is something I've been carrying around since it happened roughly 2 years ago. It was one of the main reasons that put me off drawing werewolves, my own characters, or engaging any more in the fandom. I've hinted at it a few times but I've never had the energy to come forward and deal with the fall out. I wanted to move on with the rest of my life because IRL was more important than online drama. And I knew her behavior would come back to bite her sooner or later, regardless of what I did.

It's been very validating to see that I was right.

It was around the time that Blud and I became friends that I was feeling a bit burnt out on werewolves. I'd been trying to pull together my own werewolf-related project for something close to 12 years. The past 4 years had also been pretty draining on me creatively and socially, as it had for a lot of artists with regards to the pandemic. I also had some IRL things I was dealing with: mainly with my marriage and transitioning between medications to manage my anxiety + bipolar.

Unfortunately, I didn't have the foresight to screenshot everything at the time. I do have logs from back when we roleplayed together. There are several conversations in them but because they were saved as text documents, they're pretty dubious in terms of solid evidence.

It would have been better if I had taken screenshots as it was happening, rather than just saving the logs. With what I *do* have, however, I feel as though it may be enough to make the point that I'm trying to make, and to exhibit how horrible things got.

I'll provide some context.

I had talked with Blud on and off over the years, and we had always gotten along. We had a lot in common and after we had started talking more, our friendship eventually grew into a collaborative project. We were going to combine our stories and write a comic based on it. We had a lot of discussions on how Blud was reticent to do this in the beginning and how she wanted a contract to be made up so that in the event that something *did* happen, we could both walk away feeling like it was handled fairly.

Honestly, I should have listened to the first alarm that went off in my brain, when, in an act of ominous foreboding she said something along the lines of don't be so sure, it could happen. It was in response to me being like "we're getting along so well and share so much of a bond right now. I can't fathom that being a problem!"

The contract never materialized. It was something we had decided to do *after* we had put together something of a prototype project to see how well we worked together. It made complete sense to me at the time as we were both eager to focus on the fun parts of writing and drawing together.

It was decided that I would be the lead artist (doing coloring and final lines) while Blud would do everything else (which was inking, layouts, and the majority of the writing). The both of us felt that she had more experience in those areas. I also believed that she had a better knack for it as well. I had felt that she had a better understanding of story structure than myself. And I thought that Blud had felt the same way about my art. That I had the experience to take point on that.

Since I had collaborated with other artists and writers before, I attempted to approach the project with the same sort of professionalism I always do. Especially the projects that I genuinely thought stood a chance of being published in the future. We had started out trying to get a feel for each other's flows and rhythms. I had expected Blud to try and meet me in the middle of where our processes would potentially differ from one another, so that we could develop a fairly smooth workflow.

I had also expected, according to our discussions on the matter, that we would value each other's opinions on things and take them into consideration. We had such good synchronicity already.

In the beginning, there wasn't any unusual behavior that caught my attention. Blud was a bit uncomfortable with trying out new things but I did my best to accommodate her so that our project could move forward without too much turbulence. She had also mentioned to me before that she was autistic, and since my husband is also autistic, I knew how difficult it could be when it came to adapting to new routines. But when it was time for her to deliver the first set of layouts, it wasn't at all what I expected.

What I had expected was something with margins, clearly marked boxes, and figures that I could do rough lines over. I also expected notes that confirmed what we had discussed earlier about the project; that way I knew what she wanted or if there would be any changes. She took offense to this, feeling like I was violating our agreement. Though Blud did try to give me space with regards to the actual art, and while she would offer criticisms here and there, I trusted her opinion as an artist and as a friend. But apparently that didn't go both ways. In fact, Blud seemed to be offended that I expected more from her.

Blud agreed to concede. She suddenly seemed fine with the changes that I had asked for after seeing the layouts. I guess she was feeling overstimulated by the change and I might have been applying too much of a critical tone to her responses to begin with. I have had to deal with rejection sensitivity throughout my life and it's certainly prompted me to approach what people say to me online with a bit of scrutiny (sometimes too much).

And while I was mildly annoyed, although admittedly I was more concerned with Blud's overall reaction to my asking for clarification about several things in the layouts, I let it go. But it seemed like there was a problem. The majority of my ideas were either rejected or outright overridden with Blud convincing me that my faulty memory had made me unable to remember what we had agreed upon. Or that I might have been misremembering in my own favor.

There was one time where we were discussing a monster's design. Blud had already decided to settle on one design that she had come up with, even as I continued to offer other suggestions. The story was to take place in my setting, so I was under the impression that I got to decide what kind of creatures should populate it. The conversation ended somewhat ambiguously. I had assumed that we'd come to a solid conclusion later.

I came back the next day and it turned out that we were using her design because that was what we had decided on. "Don't you remember? You really need to do something about that faulty memory of yours, Tek. I can't be doing this for you all the time."

At which point, Blud would go back and meticulously scour the conversation until she managed to find a set of lines that would make it seem as though I had 100% agreed. Even when I tried to explain that I had meant something else, she took it as an affront on her inability to understand nuances due to her autism.

I admit that my memory isn't that greatest at times, but I've never had anyone complain about it before. And none of my friends have ever minded providing reminders to me if I did misremember something incorrectly. We all forget stuff at times, right? It's *still* something that I'm self-conscious about because (like a lot of people with ADHD) my memory seems selective at times. This was, apparently, a problem that I needed to manage.

And even as I'm remembering these incidents to the best of my ability, I've already spent so much time recounting all of this to friends. I feel confident in my recollection. There are some details that may overlap or become entwined with other things, but it all basically tells the same story. Especially in conjunction with what's been said by others. You're free to take it as hearsay since I do not have screenshots to back this up.

I will mention (since I've been told it's something that Blud has taken particular interest in) that at one point, I did have a crush on her. I was having some problems IRL, and it was nice to have someone whom I felt actually understood me. I also felt like I saw a lot of myself in her. I think that, at one point, I did describe her as the kind of "girlfriend" I would want. Blud seemed to indicate the feeling was mutual.

Between our collaborative partnership and all of the details we shared about our lives, it did feel like an intimate relationship at times. I had no intentions of pursuing it. We were not compatible in our romantic and sexual identities, and I had no intention of leaving my current partner for her.

I had begun to notice red flags, even if I wasn't ready to accept them yet.

I've had experience with abusive relationships in the past but they were in person, and not online. I knew what to look out for and yet I was being willfully ignorant about our friendship. I wanted to give Blud the benefit of the doubt. I wanted the project to work *so* badly that I was willing to work with her increasing demands as the months went by.

I had no idea that those demands would change into, quite literal, temper tantrums. It would then trigger my fawning response which was due to an abusive family situation that I had dealt with before I moved to Canada. The tactic was this: concede to someone until there was a time that they either understood reason or I had the chance to use it against them if necessary.

I started to take screenshots. I wish that I had taken a lot more of them so that everyone could get a better idea of what was happening. I did go back and manage to record the majority of the first outburst. It was the first inkling I had that Blud wasn't playing with a full deck of cards. I knew that that would be one of the first conversations that she would promptly delete. And consequently, I was right.

This assortment of screenshots will exhibit the first serious confrontation that Blud had with me. I am absolutely *not* proud of how I handled this. I was literally panicking at the time and doing whatever I could to get her to calm down. Because I have a temper that can look similar to this in person, I knew that I had to wait until the post-tantrum clarity would hit Blud. I tried my best to not lose my own temper in turn but looking back, I feel that I came off as sounding too timid.

I didn't want to ruin this project.

I wanted to make a comic with an individual that I admired and respected as a fellow artist. And, with me not knowing how to respond, my main priority was to not make things any worse than they already were.

Below is the conversation in its entirety:

I had taken this screenshot on my phone after I had stepped away to compose myself. Blud had handled the confrontation and criticism with a reasonable amount of apprehension. But what had not occurred to me was that I could have said something that would remind her of past experiences with a roleplaying group.

It was something that had evidently scarred Blud for life.

I took away the wrong things from what she had told me, choosing to focus on the aspects of the "betrayal" that had appeared to bother her the most. And in hindsight, I did not see the correlation. I was genuinely apologetic that I had hurt her feelings.

But I *will* critique Blud for her poor handling of the situation. Whether or not I had hurt her feelings, no one is entitled to act like this or claim that this is what attempting to resolve a problem should look like.

I wasn't sure on how to initially respond to Blud. It had been ages since I'd had to deal with someone flying off the handle like that.

The following screenshots are where the conversation picked up, after she had already deleted the above message:

We had weathered the "storm" and after Blud calmed down, she was ready to communicate. There was a part of me that was genuinely sincere when I apologized to her. I did mean it when I said that I had no intentions of hurting her and that I hadn't considered how my statement would sound to her.

I had hoped that this had been a stress response due to factors outside of our collaboration. And especially when I took into account how she had interacted with me in the past. I knew that Blud had a lot going on IRL, and that she had already put a considerable amount of energy into this project.

I had taken her meltdown more personally than she could perceive that I would, because this was something that was acceptable to her. She had a "condition" that would absolve her of these abhorrent meltdowns and I needed to get used to them if we were going to continue working on that project together.

I was shaking the entire time we were typing in the chat.

I was sincere in my responses. I really did want to work things out with Blud and give her the benefit of the doubt. I could have been taking the things that she said too personally or maybe I had been reading too much into the situation. Was there a chance that I could have been misreading her outburst? I tried my best to keep an open mind though I was still somewhat baffled by the fact that she would have meltdowns as often as she did.

I confided in my husband and some other friends about the situation. They were also bewildered by Blud's actions.

By this point, I was struggling with the reality that this collaboration was most likely *not* going to work out but I still wanted to try. I still cared about Blud. We would still hang out together and talk about things like music, our characters, or our stories.

While I did have the foresight to go back and screenshot this section, I wasn't fast enough to get screenshots of everything else that I will be going over. Blud *did* admit to going back and deleting certain exchanges due to a mixture of shame; not wanting to look at them when she would scroll through our conversations.

In retrospect, it was very telling.

And even after that meltdown, I still enjoyed the friendship that I had with her. I kept my guard up but I was willing to make compromises on her behalf if it resulted in better communication between the two of us. Blud made me promise to immediately tell her if I had a problem with something. I also agreed to keep notes of our conversations.

It worked for the most part.

In the end though, it became apparent that Blud wasn't willing to do the same for me (even after we had an extended conversation about it). I then realized that I had been tasked with basically *managing* her autism for her. I was already busy with my supposedly "bad memory" at the time; and Blud was more than ready to scroll back up through our conversations to cherry-pick a line or two of text to remind me of what was said earlier.

Because, for her, circumstances couldn't ever change. If they did, it would mean that Blud had lost control of the situation and that she was in the wrong. She could *not* be in the wrong.

And if she was in the wrong? It would take solid evidence, three witnesses, and a court of law to prove it.

She had two other major meltdowns after this. I managed to step away from communicating with her through one of them and I don't remember the other meltdown lasting very long. She immediately deleted the texts of both of those instances before I could take screenshots of them.

It seemed like I could do nothing right when it came to Blud, no matter the lengths I would go to accommodate her. I knew that it was a common tactic used by abusers. I finally accepted that our partnership wasn't going to work out and I began thinking about an exit strategy. The final straw was when she began to expect me to be at her beck and call.

I had promised that I would be there for her, within reason, and I was willing to offer reassurances whenever she would ask me for them. The promise had been made back when we had first started to talk to one another with more frequency, before Blud had shown me her true colors. I would end up completely underestimating just how badly she would need reassurance.

To be frank, I underestimated a lot about Blud in the beginning.

I would end up mentioning that I enjoyed my space in several different conversations with her. That there was a chance that I might be offline for several days so I could take care of things IRL and recharge my social batteries. I'm somewhat of a recluse. And an adult who enjoys things that aren't online.

She said that it was fine.

I became incredibly anxious when I would talk to Blud, especially after her somewhat abrupt change in personality.

I then attempted to put my foot down about boundaries and this is what she had to say:

I decided to walk away for a bit and I came back after I had had some time to think things over. This wasn't healthy for either of us. I wrote a couple of sentences to say goodbye to Blud before I blocked her. I knew that my actions would probably infuriate her. She had told me in the past that she *hated* not being able to have the final word... which she was able to do through email:

“And I'm not letting you pretend you have control over the situation, or the high ground. You distinctly have neither. But since you're determined to stick to your 'principles' on this, I've decided to make it easier for you.”

She thought that she was absolved of all sins just because I had said that I would stand by her at her worst. And at the time that I said that, I had no idea that her worst would be her trying everything possible to protect her boundaries while stomping all over mine. It didn't matter what she said or how often she would apologize when I would confront her. She kept doing it.

I admit that I wasn't perfect in this situation either.

There were times when I was condescending, critical, or downright mean when I talked to Blud because that was the way I had felt when she was talking to me. I soon realized that it didn't matter either way. I could have been using the friendliest tone imaginable and she still would have perceived it as either mocking or dismissive on my end. There were even a few times where I would preface my explanations with an advisory “please know that I am not attacking you and try to read this in an understanding tone,”etc. I would then post an explanation I had spent hours picking at to ensure that there was no way she could misinterpret the intent. Even so, she still read the majority of what I said as criticism and would take it to heart.

I never expected Blud to do something that made her uncomfortable; nor did I expect her to overextend herself when it came to our project. I would go out of my way to make sure everything was fine when we would talk about it. I only expected mutual respect in return.

When we would get into discussions (arguments), she would never attempt to understand my point of view or let me explain myself. It would have made it about me when it should have been about Blud and her needs. She sometimes would agree to come to a compromise about something, but only if I would admit that I was in the wrong.

I know that if Blud was to look at these screenshots, she'd be incredulous that I'm trying to distract from the horrible things that *I* did. And those horrible things that I did? I tried my best to work with her.

It wasn't just her poor teamwork that bothered me. It was her attitude and the lack of respect that she showed me. She would never ask me to clarify something that I said; always assuming that it was a criticism against her. I can only speculate that Blud did not want to hear about how any of this was her fault, like in the email she sent me.

I don't know if I was actually her friend at any point. Friends make efforts to understand one another. Ideally, they’d want their friendships to continue, and they would want everyone to be getting along and having fun. She seemed to actively defy that.

I would argue that things like this don't just happen in a vacuum. There's almost always a reason for such things, but it's honestly a mystery to me as to where this vitriol comes from. I don't know why Blud sees monsters in every word, especially if they come from a "friend".

I've seen her viscously mock herself during meltdowns; it seems like she hates herself and expects everyone else to hate her too. I think that she wants it to be the truth, so that it validates the feelings she has about herself. The behavior patterns that I'd been exposed to are consistent with the idea that Blud is seeking confirmation about the personal assumptions she has about herself. It's what makes her so volatile to those around her. Yet, she refuses to break the cycle.

I hope that she can make that choice in the future but at this point, I'm not holding my breath.

#dogblud #it feels a bit dirty doing a call out post #but people need to know #she's gotten away with this for far too long #i generally tend to give people the benefit of a doubt #clearly too much #but you can only make up so many excuses before you begin to realize that #at the end of the day #people still have the ability to make a choice #“everyone always leaves me”#well maybe you should really consider what the common variable is #just sayin

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k0juki · 7 months ago

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omg hi!

Can I request a Kimi one-shot where the reader isn't Finnish or northern in the slightest (I was thinking about Mediterranean, like Italian or something like that) and she feels bad that whenever she's around, her bf and all his mates and family speak English so she can understand what they're saying. So one day she decides to learn Finnish on her own withouth telling anyone and fast forward to a year or so, she's gotten to a pretty good level although the language is completely different from her own and one day she surprises Kimi by speaking to him in Finnish while they're cuddling. I wanna see what he does to that lol.

Sorry if it's too long!! Thanks for reading all of this!!! 💝

Hey @cliosunshine!! Thank you for request!!🩷

Kimi Räikkönen x fem!reader

A/N: And for everyone that are still waiting for their request, I'm trying to make them ASAP, because I was ill and I couldn't do them, but now I'm on it!

English is not my first language so feel free to point out any mistakes or errors!

Warnings: translated Finnish! mention of y/n and fluff.

Words: 373

---

The warmth of the warm sun streamed through the curtains, casting a golden glow across the bedroom where Kimi and the Y/n lay together in a cozy embrace. Kimi's steady breathing filled the air, his arm draped protectively over her as they basked in a rare moment of quiet.

For months now, Y/n had been secretly teaching herself Finnish, determined to bridge the gap that had always stood between her and Kimi's world. She always felt a bit aside because of their language barrier, but she was determined to change that.

She had spent countless hours pouring over textbooks, wrestling with the unfamiliar sounds and structures of the language, all without a word to anyone. But today was different. Today, she was ready to reveal her secret. "Kimi," she murmured, her voice barely louder than a whisper, "I have something to tell you."

His blue eyes, usually so calm and unreadable, blinked in surprise. "What is it?" he asked, his voice rough with sleep. Taking a deep breath, Y/n summoned her courage. "I've been learning Finnish for some time now," she confessed, her heart pounding in her chest. Kimi's brow furrowed in confusion. "Finnish?" he repeated, clearly taken aback.

"Yeah.." that nervous feeling could be heard in her voice and she knew that. "I wanted to surprise you, so I've been studying, every day, in secret." There was a beat of silence as Kimi processed her words, his eyes searching hers as if trying to gauge her sincerity. Then, slowly, a smile tugged at the corners of his lips.

"Se on erittäin söpöä sinulta" Kimi slowly said, to know, she could understand every single word. /That's very sweet of you/

"You didn't have to do that, you know?"

"I know but I wanted" Y/n could feel the tension melting away, replaced by a warm, fluttering feeling in her chest. She had been so nervous, unsure of how he would react, but now, seeing the genuine happiness in his eyes, she knew it had been worth it.

Kimi's gaze softened, his hand reaching up to gently brush a strand of hair from her face. "Ja nyt voit" he replied, his voice filled with a quiet awe. /And now you can/

---

Requests are open!

Picture is not mine! Credit goes to owner!

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utilitycaster · 2 months ago

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What do you think of the overall structural and character changes for these first three episodes of TLOVM S3? I've been pretty happy/they make sense to me, but I've seen some grumbling, particularly about the changes to J'mon's entrance. (Some believe they could have kept the fight and trial, thinking it wouldn't have taken up much time, which I am...dubious about)

Much as I enjoyed the fight and trial in the campaign I think J'mon's intro was fine and of the changes it frankly did not even register. Like...there's a lot of deviation, and if someone's fixated on that it's like. that? really?

Anyway just a quick rundown:

Changing Scanlan to have Kaylie present in Ank'Harel and for him to fuck up again with her is a good idea setting up the Bard's Lament, as is sort of removing the whole "do you spice" arc and leaving in a little nod to it, because like, that was funny in-game but it doesn't translate well

I am cautiously in favor of Vax being the one to pull away from Keyleth. I know Keyleth is tough to convey well in this adaptation - I think for all that her arc stands out more in the campaign, Vex's is easier to turn into an animated series - but the "Keyleth isn't sure and Vax is like I understand and I'll wait but like. could we make out" vibes in-campaign never really were my thing even though it was consensual, so this does sit a little better with me. I do hope Keyleth is given some opportunities to voice her own feelings though, complicated as they are, as well as like...this makes more sense in my critiques of Campaign 3 but in Campaign 1, early Keyleth was terminally indecisive. Conclave-era Keyleth was "I know what I DON'T want (the Clasp, Raishan)" which was a huge step forward, but shooting things down, while important, isn't the same as leading. She eventually reached actual leadership - knowing what she did want. I think if Keyleth can argue for the things she wants, even if they're a little different than they were in Campaign 1, we'll be fine. So we're in a holding pattern to see what she does. I think giving her a juicy spire of conflux retrieval in which she takes the lead would address any concerns.

Vex and Percy changes are great, the vibe is correct, that's all I care about and other people have discussed this at length far more eloquently than I will, as I'm going to bed in like 15 minutes.

Intrigued by Draconia changes, not sure what they'll be exactly but I assume they'll still destroy it. I think destroying it in front of Percy and Vex might give it the emotional weight it had in the campaign without, well, you know.

Moving the armor to the hells sounds great, I thought they'd just skip Plate of the Dawnmartyr tbh because it was kind of clunky and weird to retrieve but now I'm invested for Zerxus reasons.

I think I'm a lot more open to adaptational changes than much of the fandom? Like...look. I think if you hear "we're doing different things" for C2 and think "Molly lives", as discussed before, you do not get how this works. But the changes we have here all feel pretty true to the characters; not having every specific battle (ESPECIALLY because D&D battles don't always translate well to TV) is literally not even on my radar.

#answered #spiderdreamer-blog #tlovm spoilers

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towards-toramunda · 1 year ago

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Thinking about more iconic lines from the show over the years instead of going to bed and created a list that is far too long:

- What’s my mother’s name?

- My best. Finally.

- I have so many flowers to bring to her.

- You were not born with venom in your veins. You learned it. You learned it.

- Don’t get on my ass about it! All I heard is that its pretty easy to do here thats all I took from what you said. (Bonus: its for the god of arts and crafts)

- At dawn, we plan.

- Doo doot doo doo doot doooo donuts!

- What matters more, the dream or the dreamer?

- Sleep well with your bad decisions.

- Nothing happens for a reason. It’s absolute fucking chaos.

- Patience is fine, but it can curdle into apathy.

- I’ve met the devil, thats not him.

- You never take copper. That's just kicking someone while they're down. You take silver if they're an asshole, and you take gold regardless.

- Time is one of my specialties.

- It’s entirely off-putting how disarmingly charming you are.

- How lucky I am to have had all of you. How lucky indeed.

- I smell like a crayon.

- I could tell by the bone structure and the contempt.

- I think I can punch ghosts now.

- Big moon, little moon.

- Pop, pop!

- I need chaos. I have faith in chaos.

- Molly said not to steal from happy people.

- I am going to tell you the story of how I murdered my mother and father.

- Smiley day to ya!

- I killed my family, I’ll throw you under a bridge.

- We’re on the moon bitch.

- She throws it. I shoot it. It explodes! NO STRUCTURAL DAMAGE! (FLUFFERNUTTER)

- I am all for faith, and I'm not going to pick a god. They can pick me. It'll be the first one that actually praises me and then maybe I'll fucking answer. I'll wait. They can fucking beg. And I will listen, which is more than they ever fucking did.

- I would like to RAGE!

- The worst thing that has happened to me has already happened.

- We're running; it's bad.

- You can reply to this message.

- Dagger, dagger, dagger.

- Opinions are like opera. Sure, you can listen to them, but why would you, really?

- There is no god that strides this world that I worship more than I worship your heart.

- I would like to live long enough to be someone else.

- Help, its again.

- Whoever it was, just put it back. I think they've earned it. Put it back.

- I’m fun scary.

- Sorry, babe. Gotta handle these ninjas.

- I’m the cleric? I’ve never traveled with a bunch of people I thought would die in front of me.

- He thinks I’m gonna go into the water for some fucking buttons.

- You are, at the moment, the luckiest person in Whitestone. Do you know why? Because you’re at the bottom of my list.

- You need me more than I need you.

- I protect him. He’s my boy. And I keep him safe.

- I made the earth remember him.

- Come correct or get corrected.

- Do not go far from me.

- Are you worth saving?

- How do I want to do this?

- Heaven to some, and hell to others.

- Fix him!

- Why do we tell stories?

- Do you spice?

- Listen you fucking jungle! I'm a paladin of the Wildmother. You're going to move or we're going to bust you wide open! We'll wreck this place. Don't make me fucking tell you twice!

- I am your god, long may I rein, eat of my fruits.

- Anybody can make lights. Anybody could send a message through a wire. I want to bend reality to my will.

- Would you like to talk before or after?

- What the fuck is up with that?

- To reach a hand down to somebody, they need to be beneath you! And I'm beneath nobody.

- The one eyed monster slayed my pussy.

- Time is a weird soup.

- I’m killing someone. Hold, please.

- Gold is a resource by which mortaldom climbs.

- Why are you so mean to me?

- Yours is the face I saw when murder entered my heart.

- This one time I saw a bug carrying a piece of bread that was like five times its size and he was carrying upstairs, like up and then he would turn, and then up, and then he would turn.

- I live as long as Whitestone lives.

- Vox Machina! Fuck shit up!

- I’m not disappointed, I’m just angry.

- Someone prayed for a miracle and there you were.

- We don't leave people behind. That's just the rule. You do not leave people the fuck behind.

- Call me child one more goddamned time!

- Finish it, Champion.

- I am of the Empire. But I am no friend to the Empire.

- I think it has been a long time since anyone has pointed out to you that you're a fool. Pain doesn't make people, it's love that makes people. The pain is inconsequential. It's love that saves them. And you would know that but you have none around you. You said so yourself, you surround yourself with lies and deceptions. And I wish for you, in the future, to find someone to mourn you when you are gone.

#critical role #cr3 #bells hells #cr2 #the mighty nein #cr1 #vox machina #there are so many good ones #by all means reblog with more keep them coming #my god taliesin has so many good ones they’re insane

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xotication · 7 months ago

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☆,

gamer bf kaneki..

he def plays ow, val, cod, & fort.. all the sluttiest games a man can play.

trust he sweats in each game too.

he'd be caught dead before he's ever bad at a game ..

he literally spends most of all his days gaming, it's a lil insane how much he just lets it rot his brain

he never rage quits but he screams so much & it's hilarious

eventually he realizes that he hasn't given you any attention & tells his friends that he has to get off for a couple hours, just for you

ken decides to start streaming one day & that day marked your fucken demise

he sets up a hand & face cam.. when you're against it, he's so confused.

you're sat there for at least ten minutes explaining to him how girls will go feral for this

one day you tune into his stream & you see multiple comments like "for free??" "wish he'd play with me" "why's he kinda.." "the veins.."

on one hand you're jealous, but on the other- you're happy knowing that he's your boyfriend

"baby can you bring me some water please" ken says in the softest voice ever, it damn near has you topple over nd roll around

you bring it to him nd he thanks you with a couple pecks

the chat is going absolutely wild?? both over his voice & him actually not being single

but what could they expect?

ken was a good looking, handsome, pretty, charming boy.. & literally every other word you could think of

he always had that sleepy look & he usually paired it with blue light glasses that made him look all the more nerdy

sometimes he'd even be shirtless & his collarbone would have you gasping for air

on some days ken didn't care about streaming

he'd sit you next to him or even on him & just have you watch him play

he'd look towards you after hitting the nastiest shots/clips on kids to make sure you saw it

some days you ask him if he wants to play minecraft with you & he never objects.. he will always make time for you when you ask for it

he introduces you to the game "it takes two" and streams when the two of you play

everyone ends up loving the dynamic you have & the way you treat each other

eventually chat starts suggesting that ken teaches you how to play the other try hard games.. so he starts with the easier one: fortnite

you think to yourself why any of them thought this would be easy for you bc it has you screaming for kaneki's help half the time you get into a close combat gunfight

he tries teaching you how to build & you end up putting random walls & stairs everywhere

he just laughs at you bc he genuinely finds it easy & can't seem to understand why it's difficult for you ??

"no sweetheart, you actually have to have structure behind your building" "i'm fucken trying ken??" "not hard enough??" "ok then you do it???"

bro builds an 8 story mansion in 20 seconds and it has you gagged

whole chat is like "were you silent or were you silenced..??"

when you start wanting to take gaming a lil more seriously, he teaches you how to play on mouse nd keyboard just like him

he even buys you a cute lil setup, & ofc its right next to his

when he introduces you to val, all the pick me's are targeting ken & it's funny asfk when they find out his gf is in the game too

they're all like "you're shit at the game anyway stfu" like HUHH?? mad bc he ain't yours lmao

also can i mention that ken is a proud "shit on" SCREAAAAMER

he has your initials in different colored keys than the rest of his keyboard

holds one of your stuffed animals on his lap when you're away from home

jokingly asks you for support under the desk (its not a joke..)

#anime #fanfic #manga #kaneki x reader #kaneki ken #tokyo ghoul #headcannons #fluff #tokyo ghoul re #kaneki #xoti writes

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tadc-harlequin-au · 5 months ago

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God I'm way too invested in this au. Anyway I wanna hear more of the biology of the puppets and marionettes (might make fanart maybe)

I don't think I'm fully ready to delve into the topic of a Marionette because it reveals major story spoilers, for now just know that they are completely and utterly devoid of life, forever following an endless directive.

For the Puppets, I guess I can give a little bit more information about them, as long as I'm not crossing a personal story boundary I've set for myself lol

Once a Puppet reaches the first enlightenment stage, black tendrils begin to appear on their innermost structures slowly but steadily, as I've explained with Caine.

These things, these transformations... they can be jarring for the Puppet experiencing them for the first time especially when the Puppet starts to feel full sensations such as an electrifying jolt, a pain, or a touch, but make no mistake; aside from their weird alien appearance they mean no danger, and they can even come in pretty handy.

About half-way through the story, Pomni actually gains new abilities everytime she reaches a stage of enlightenment, and there are six steps to achieving the full process, and it may vary on how fast or slow these Puppets can achieve them.

Yeah, can you tell this is like, the leveling up system? lol

Firstly, let's start with Awareness.

Awareness is when a Puppet grows to think beyond their directive; their thoughts becomes separated from the imprinted norm that they used to know their whole existence.

Although, it's still the first stage, which means that even if a Puppet begins to think original thoughts for themselves, they'll still have a tendency to follow the original commands.

They'll just start thinking "hey, maybe I should stop and think about what exactly I'm doing for a second. Just for a second. Then I promise I'll go back to my routine."

At this rate, there's not much changes happening on the physical, except letting a Puppet feel physical touch, despite their mechanical body.

Secondly; Sentience

Sentience is when a Puppet grows... well, a genuine sentience, one that wasn't pseudo and pre-programmed into their very being.

They'll start exploring aspects that they haven't thought of exploring, and this is where creativity and imagination gets to shine a little more if the Puppet is on the creative side of things.

a Puppet may undergo a change of personality (not always guaranteed), so don't be surprised when the once-happy-go-lucky puppet starts crying out of nowhere.

black tendrils may seep out of an exposed joint or a cracked part, but they're only tiny little veins.

Thirdly; Conscience

Conscience is when a Puppet starts to feel emotions based on an inner moral system, that wasn't, again; pre-programmed into them.

they'll start to THINK what's right or wrong based on personal experiences, or maybe even remember their OWN former moral system from their past life, and even a combination of the two.

This is usually the part where they'll start to judge the directive imprinted into them, maybe bouts of unknown regrets will come too.

the veins become more noticeable at this stage, and can now be used for physical attributes/advantages.

Fourth; Reminiscence

This one is usually in tandem with the third, but not everyone can have the same case, since it always varies between all of them.

Reminiscence is when a Puppet remembers their past life prior to becoming what they are now; no strings holding them back from recalling anymore.

These come in the form of seeing major life events unfold right between your eyes; whereas before, there'll only be hazy glimpses.

Fifth; Persipience

Persipience is when a Puppet becomes wiser, and can now overcome the directive they were tasked with if they wished to.

This process can be agonizing for some because it is similar to the symptom of a withdrawal from an addiction.

Fortunately, once they've gotten over past that obstacle, they'll gain full automation over their bodies, the "itch" no longer as present as it used to be.

Sixth; Enlightenment

The final step.

A Puppet needs to come to terms with their new discovery.

They need to be at peace with the process of what had happened to them, accepting the progression from "Human" to "Puppet" as a part of their existence.

Final evolution takes place, and the Puppet can now fully utilize their soul magic to it's fullest extent.

Just like wisdom, not many are willing to go through this process/or can achieve this, since accepting the idea of "becoming a Puppet" like it's similar to the concept of growing up from adolescence to adulthood can be hard for some to fully stomach.

Although, it is considered as the "fully matured" process of the six stages.

Now, Madness takes just as much of steps as Enlightenment does. Only this time, you're on the wrong end of the stick.

Firstly; there's Isolation.

As the name itself applies, isolation is when a Puppet denies/is denied social interaction that their soul wants, prioritizing objectives over anything.

Subtle twitchiness may occur.

Secondly; Revelation

A revelation settles deep within a soul fragment laying inside a puppet's heart; they're trapped, and there's no escape.

Can also be called "entrapment", but revelation is cooler and sounds more fancy

Thirdly; Rebellion

Rebellion is when an attempt to rebel against the internal system of a Puppet takes place, but is not achieved due to the lack of free will and sentience on the physical and mental body.

The body becomes more uncontrollable, dangerously swinging and twisting.

the literal metaphor of an internal battle happening within oneself.

Fourth; Corruption

Another attempt is made by the soul energy, only this time, it's harnessing the worse aspects of a Puppet to propel itself and grow physically stronger, a desperate option.

large, black tendrils may burst through weaker parts and/or limbs; namely joints.

Repairs? What's that? Who even needs 'em lmaoooo

Fifth; Obsession

A Puppet begins to obsess over directives; a byproduct of the soul energy harnessing the negative traits that it's host was ingrained with.

The physical appearance of a Puppet becomes more grim, overexaggerated features that you'd only see in horror movies start to become more prominent.

Work is non-stop, no breaks. Liberation is irrelevant. The concept of humanity is irrelevant. They only exist to follow their directives now. If some shithead wants to tell you otherwise, they will fucking DIE.

Sixth; Madness

You've grown physically stronger. But at what cost?

ANYWAYS that was a massive infodump, what were talking about again?

Oh right. Puppet biology.

Uh, They're hella weird.

#thanks for the ask!#tadc #tadc au #harlequin au #tadc harlequin au #the amazing digital circus #PUPPET BIOLOGY 101!!!!!!#Hope you enjoyed the insane ramblings of a madman!!!!#I like the concept of everyone making OCs that are sane puppets #but come on..... can someone make a BOSS oc that's completely batshit insane #pretty pretty pleaseeee #that's one of the best things about this AU after all :3 #come onnnnnnnnn they're the selling point!!!!#how could you not want one of these crasi guys!!!! (holds up the most grotesque things you'll ever see)

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enteroctopusdarkysilis · 5 months ago

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✨Bionicle crab !✨

It was, originally, meant to be just another arthropod. However, someone reblogged my previous rahi, along with this comment :

Well, guess what ? Yes, absolutely. I’m glad I saw it because it gave me the inspiration for this monstrosity (and it made me laugh more than I would admit, too). Thanks.

I must recognise that if I compare my rahis, there is a clear pipeline. I don’t think it can go much further in this direction.

Anyways, details/closeups/weird illegal technic I just found out, below the cut !

Front (smol Visorak for scale) :

Because it’s really big. It’s also a good excuse to show off my really fancy and glittery Kanohi. No clue where it comes from but it’s beautiful !

I’m really happy with how mean this things looks, overall. It’s most definitely the bad guy for Toas to fight. It has a really good scale to work with my larger customer Toas [here], but it could also act as a really large rahi for my smaller space-based Toas [here]. Why a large crab stealing Kanohis in space, you may ask ? No idea. I’d have to actually think out a lore for that.

I started the conception with the frame (which does make sense, in theory), then the legs, and finally the shell. This was only partially smart, because that meant I did not account for the shell's mass when building the legs. Essentially, this poor thing can't stand on it's own, so I'm using two technic bars underneath to keep it up right (which are hidden in editing, of course).

Top/Hind (shell) :

I think the shell was pretty decent. I tried to use as little pieces as possible to keep it light, but it's still a lot. Among these pieces can be found one Visorak claw and three Mantax feet, which have a nice texture for organic feet. There is also another foot at the front which comes from an Inika set which I can't seem to find. I'm also using some of these large technic panels, which cover a lot of surface without being too much of a pain to set up (still quite a lot, since they're connected to the feet at at an angle, feet which which are also connected to the frame at an odd angle...) Speaking of Mantax, I alsu used the black-pearl shells, because these, too, have a really organic vibe, and it gave a small touch of pearl which was missing on the body.

I tried to keep the back relatively slick, to avoid something similar to an abdomen since it's not a spider. Still I had to extend it a little bit using the rounded cubical cover, to hide some socket joints, but it's okay-ish.

Neath :

Truly a mess, I must admit. As I started with each side separately, I tried to somehow connect them with the large grey technic frame (in the middle). On either sides, I have a whole bunch of axle connectors, both standard and angled, which allow for the thing to appear rounder than it could have been. The two leg sockets peices at the front are used for the eyes, and the pieces abov (barley visible) is a classic Bionicle shoulders piece clipped backward as a base for the pincers arms.

Pincer :

Or mandatory unusual feet usage. These really works well as any kind of claw or armor, in my opinion. The black arm pieces used here (Hordika leg piece) were particularly good for the job as they technic pin holes in there allowed me to add ad additional socket practically at the same level at the original one (even if I would rather have used black technic bars instead of the light grey ones, but i couldn't find any in my supplies... It's likely the Space station's fault.

Legs :

Or equally mandatory foot out of not foot pieces. Here is a cursed homebrew way to make legs : one Bohrok head part (bricklink call these shoulders ?) to display the piston-like element and serve as structure, linked with Toa Metru legs (which slots above nicely. And then comes the magic trick, for the Rahkshi shells (silveragain, because I have many of these) have a small attachment point toward the end, that is meant to hold the back blades in place; but it also perfectly fits right on the small ledge in the middle of the leg piece ! Granted, it's not a very secure connection, but these two pieces don't need anything else but that to hold. I actually loved this one so much, you can notice two additional Rahkshi shells held similarly on the tope of the crab's shell.

In order to connect the legs individually to the frame, I am using Vahki legs for the exterior limbs, and Pihraka arms for the central ones (these arms have the particular property of having the restrictive sockets on either sides, which makes it good to keep the leg's shape.

The middle sections are made using two simple axle-socket pieces connected by old plates, usually found in technic sets predating the Bionicle them.

…And obviously, I had to make another makeshift studio (I actually really like this one). Have a look at all these terribly assembled elements !

#lego #lego moc #bionicle #lego bionicle #rahi #also carcinisation I guess

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dvilsdesire · 2 months ago

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Some in depth character analysis... (:

This is going to get long... as I do a bit of a character analysis on Haarlep with little bits of Raphael as well. I will likely go on tangents if they come to me, so please be aware that there is likely no solid structure as I ramble!

Please note that this is ALL speculation and headcanon as there is no way of analysing a character's full potential when you only see a few moments of them in game, let alone Haarlep's relationship with Raphael when you don't even get to see them interact outside of Haarlep's small comments and end-game letter.

Know that there is also no right and no wrong, and I will be exploring both sides and "what if" scenarios. These are just some things I want to expand upon, and we are all entitled to different opinions and headcanons. That's the beauty of getting to explore and delve into characters that are given no depth to them--you can make them your own!

First and foremost, it should be noted that DnD lore on incubus has flip flopped over the editions. Where they were once strictly demons, they were then turned to devils, and now they are recognised as simply "fiends". Haarlep, in game, is a fiend, and his race is incubus. Again... be your OWN DM... do what makes you happy, that's the beauty of DnD (but also remember that Larian itself have their own set of rules and lore that they made up which may have separated them from DnD lore as well, and that's not a bad thing! The more creativity, the better imo, especially in a world like FR).

I personally write Haarlep as a devil aligned fiend who leans towards more chaotic than lawful evil, but that's just me! Toss in a little demon bloodline, especially with the Queen of Succubus, and play around a little!

Okay, let's get into Haarlep! (potentially triggering content)

I'm going to go through this in order of Haarlep's scene. There was a really neat theory that was shared HERE about how Haarlep starts off with a poem as they are introduced. Is this something that the devs simply used as trickery so we THINK it's Raphael in the bed (even though it clearly says Haarlep)?

Also note how Haarlep uses the term "Mouse", the one that Raphael has been calling the player the whole time. A coincidence? Or is this proof that Haarlep is aware of what is going on with Raphael and his potential client? Is this rhyming corruption simply from being within the HoH or something that Haarlep has picked up from via time spent with Raphael? All of these things fascinate me, because as a devil, and Raphael who is quite literally meant to symbolise the real world devil (there is a lot of symbolism with Raphael and Satan/Lucifer imo but that's not something I'll delve into here), or are they just trying to lead us into a false sense of security that this is just Raphael playing his games (despite the name on the subtitles)?

Maybe it's an outer moment of we know as the player, but our actual PC doesn't know. Which gives us the opportunity to play around a little with them, which is also cool. But the idea that Haarlep also says a little poem and speaks in such a devilish manner, is a nice little touch and a reminder OF Raphael as well.

Then, of course, the player themselves, identifies Haarlep as Raphael, despite the youthful look (I'll delve into this later).

What interests me is Haarlep's response if you actually say this. He seems amused that you'd even THINK he's Raphael, despite his obvious visage. The pride of an incubus, perhaps? Haarlep simply toying with you and making this encounter last longer by the way he speaks so slowly and playfully? Luring you in, one question and curiosity at a time.

Haarlep genuinely seems interested in WHY you are there, yet if we go from line one where they're calling you a thief... it pretty much indicates that he knows you're there when you're not supposed to be (which makes entire sense since the whole HoH has its own riddles and games you need to play to get inside rooms under lock and key). Even to get into the boudoir, you require an invitation (though Raphael clearly forgot that he left his door to the balcony wide open and there's rock formation you can traverse lol--things like this are PURELY game mechanics, and I don't think they should be read into deeply. It's a game, your player NEEDS access, whether it's getting it the hard way, the lawful way, or outright breaking in lol).

If you lie to Haarlep and claim it's a botched teleportation spell, he instantly sees through you, you don't even get the chance for a saving check on this. No matter what, Haarlep knows you're not supposed to be there. However, he wants to know WHY you're there.

Interestingly enough, Haarlep's voice is very aggressive when you lie to him, especially when the first introduction is all sweet and breathy. This comes down to control, imo (which we also learn that Haarlep is the dominant role in the bedroom, or at least a top--more on that as I go). Genuinely, though, it feels like Haarlep is very displeased if someone lies to his face, though being the incubus they are, will also give you a chance to respond truthfully before he decides your fate--this is something I also see Raphael do. Even if you attack him in your first meeting, he gives you a second chance (and a third if I recall? He only tells you the deal is off if you attack him in Sharess' Caress and kicks you out of the Devil's Den--tho correct me if I'm wrong as I'm focusing on Haarlep here).

So is this typical devil behaviour and something we can expect from devils, to give you a second chance so they can get the information they want? I'd say yes. Especially if they DO want to know. Haarlep is more than happy to kill you if you don't give him what he wants, so it seems pretty standard for devil practice, and of course, he returns to being softly spoken again, almost immediately, like it's second nature. Or is this something he has simply learned from being around Raphael for so long?

If Raphael does give you a third chance, guess what? So does Haarlep. You can lie to him (though exposed instantly), and then outright tell him you refuse to tell him why you're there, and he gives you the final chance:

Obviously, fantastic that the player can really choose what they want to do, but there's also been far quicker battles in game. Haarlep really is trying to get that information from you (and your soul no doubt). If we wanted to delve deeper (I did say what ifs!), we could also question if this is just Haarlep being playful or lazy. Does he really care to go to the effort to kill, or would he rather just get some useful information? Is he threatening the player so he can just be done with his game, have sex with the player and let them leave so he can just add their glamour to the collection? Who knows! It's all under speculation.

Haarlep's health in battle, if you choose to fight him, is also 169, whereas DnD monster manual has them at 66HP. Haarlep is a stronger incubus, and at 169HP, it's much greater! Again, is this scaled up just due to game mechanics? Or something else? Makes sense by the time you delve into the HoH, a HP of 66 isn't that challenging anymore. I did do a little hc post about my thoughts HERE. Funnily enough, there was also THIS about Haarlep being titled as a courtesan.

Moving on to if you tell Haarlep the truth about why you're there. I find his response here to be very interesting, especially in the way he seems to drop the sensuality for a moment. The thoughtfulness and pause to Haarlep as he likely recognises who you are now.

The facial expression changes also, to something more concerned looking. Of course, this could all be a facade, especially as we know that Haarlep absolutely gives you the Hammer if you're willing to sleep with them.

Not the usual plucky, jovial Haarlep that is being seen, but a moment of thoughtfulness as the creature no doubt ponders what the next move could be. Perhaps Haarlep is even contemplating what Raphael would do if things were out of his control? If Tav was killed.

I often DO wonder how Raphael would react if the game ended where Haarlep killed the PC. Would he be furious that his means to get the crown is entirely fucked now? Would he just go that's frustrating but I'll get it another way? Haarlep, no doubt, would be in a lot of trouble, but it seems that either Haarlep doesn't actually care (because he knows Raphael can't really resist him anyway), or he might just get the crown another way.

Whatever the case, Haarlep does seem to entirely underestimate the powers of Tav an Co, because he attacks them if you don't comply, and I doubt he thought even if they DID get the Hammer, they weren't going to get through Raphael (Haarlep likely is playing his own game, in where yes, sure you can take the Hammer now that I have gotten what I wanted, but that doesn't mean you'll be able to leave). Once the Hammer is taken, the entire HoH becomes hostile, meaning Haarlep LIKELY knew this, and didn't think you were going to actually kill his master.

IS he outright betraying Raphael, or is he just... shortsighted? All of this is entirely up to speculation of course, but Haarlep would 110% be aware of the fact that Raphael is the son of Mephistopheles, and there is no denying that Raphael is the HARDEST boss battle of the entire game, even if you CAN power shot him with your super builds. There is no denying that Raphael's boss battle is difficult, and he would be considered one of the most powerful fights in the entire game (which is so insane to think about since you can SKIP the entire thing or just outright MISS it). So why WOULDN'T Haarlep think that Tav and co would get fucked by him in a fight, when Haarlep has likely witnessed Raphael's wrath and fury before? When we speak of this betrayal from Haarlep, there's no telling that his actual intentions were.

So... was Haarlep being a typical devil, scheming and getting what he wanted just to win both ways by believing Raphael would have bested Tav and friends (even if it didn't turn out that way in the end)? Or was he betraying Raphael because he just didn't care? OR, a third option, was he making sure Raphael wouldn't get the crown because his true master is Mephistopheles? By stealing the Hammer, there was no deal that Raphael would GET the crown in turn. There's so many things we could assume and guess, but the fact is... we don't know, because Larian never told us, and that's okay! Because that's what fanfiction is for.

As we move the scene along, Haarlep finally introduces himself. We all know that Haarlep is an anagram for Raphael, which in itself is fascinating. Where did Haarlep get the name? WHO named him? Is Raphael so in love with himself that he named his personal incubus after himself? Was it Mephistopheles? As some kind of joke? Was it Haarlep themselves? What does interest me is is how Haarlep explained that he's not just glamoured as Raphael's image, but he's transfigured. I feel like this makes it something more permanent, or even as a base setting.

I love the idea of True Form Haarlep, personally (and it is my general go to with my writing), but I DID say what if's above, and this is one of them. What if Haarlep HAS no true form? What if his form is now FIXED as Raphael as a base form (we know he can still take on other forms since yours and Haarlep says out loud he has a collection), but what IF? What IF? We just don't know...

I wanted to delve into this line next, because someone pointed out something interesting which I actually wanted to delve into deeper with it:

You might be going "no you're not, you don't look like Raphael as he does now". Well, you are correct. However, I do have a theory behind this as well. As we know in canon lore, cambions generally stop ageing in their 20's. Funnily enough... Haarlep looks around that age, which is where I personally headcanon that they first met and first slept together, when Haarlep was gifted to Raphael. That's not to say Haarlep can't change to Raphael's current, more mature, visage (or even his human form). But when Haarlep says he's the PERFECT copy, I do feel like there's some burn to that, that Raphael is reminded that HE has aged and is no longer that perfect resemblance of what he once was.

There's also a fannon theory going around that Raphael's more mature look is actually a farce, and that he uses it to appear more mature to get souls, etc. That's a really interesting take, and I love it (how manipulative of him and that works!), but my personal headcanons? Raphael is no mere cambion. Raphael is the son of Mephistopheles, and we know nothing about his mother (as mother's die at childbirth). She could have been anyone! Mephistopheles is an Archdevil, and Mephisto also looks more middle aged in most of his pics. It makes sense to me that Raphael would age more compared to other cambions simply because of his more potent bloodline and the fact that he is the son of someone so powerful. This could be a symbol of something amongst devilkind even. We know that Antilia (Raphael's half sister and Mephisto's daughter), though pretty no doubt, is described to look a lot like Mephisto.

So, my theory is that Haarlep is the appearance of Raphael when they FIRST had sex, and when he first consumed Raphael's glamour, and he wears it proudly, and no doubt Raphael keeps Haarlep around like that as a reminder of how youthful and beautiful he was. I'm not saying Raphael isn't a silver fox (he is), and Raphael still considers himself attractive, but it's like looking at your younger self when you've lost some of that edge, and you wish you could be there again. It's almost torment, which... just fits with devils, especially Raphael being such a complex character.

Some people have pointed out that there are some different structures within Haarlep and Raphael's face. Yes, there are. These are actually the things that change with age. The most obvious to me, is the ears. Raphael's are larger. This is legitimately something that happens with age. So is the structure and plumpness of cheeks (as someone who works in healthcare, these are things I see every day with patients). Even myself if I look at a pic of me 10 years ago.

(If I could mod, I would get the same screencap to compare, but for now...)

All things that come with age are (within humans):

Larger ears, wrinkles, less fat around the face and skin that becomes less plump and taut, (particularly cheeks, chin and eyes), and the thinning of lips and complexion paling. These are all exactly what Raphael has in comparison to Haarlep.

A little note on Raph's nose is that the distortion COULD be caused by changes in cartilage over the years, OR... it could be someone punched Raph in the face and it permanently got fucked after he'd been with Haarlep (whatever the case, it's still beautiful!). I still like to think someone punched him tho >.> lol.

You're looking at at least... 20 odd years between these two, tho. Raphael is said to look middle aged (in his 50's), and Haarlep, to me, looks about... 26-28 with those small wrinkles at his forehead and crows feet when he smiles?

I can't say the technical details of who designed this in game? But they did a phenomenal job on what they actually aged (or deaged for Haarlep's encounter). I have no idea if they simply used that technology on Raph's original form or what they did for Haarlep, but it's damn good.

I won't go into Raphael's sexuality in this post because it'll add too much to it, but I DO want to in the future. But moving on to Haarlep once you agree to sleep with them. What does interest me is that Haarlep wants to make sure that you're comfortable during the act, which is when the Archduchess comes to play.

Now... this one makes me question a little (and please fill me in as I don't know all DnD lore!). I do understand that incubus/succubus can be seen as interchangeable, and I do understand that once they have a glamour, they can wear it whenever, but I'm not certain about taking on a shape that... doesn't exist? Someone like Orin, who can shift into whoever she pleases on a whim without having lain with them, is that something that incubus share as well, but that brings in the question why bother sleeping with someone to take their glamour if you don't need to (outside of the fact that they are beings of sex ofc)?

Haarlep speaks about how they're adding your glamour to their collection and that's basically what they are getting out of this little transaction of yours. This is provided with the following prompts:

This gives the impression that Haarlep requires you to actually verbally VOW that he can have your body... that he can add it to his glamour...

Is that the case, or is Haarlep simply using you and playing games because they WANT to hear you say it? Is this devilry at its finest? Or does an incubus literally require permission to gain that glamour? Like the victim is literally giving up a part of themselves in some wicked contract?

So, please... let me know how it works with Raphael's Archduchess form, OR was this simply something Larian threw in there so the player could feel more comfortable with a choice of female or male? I would love to delve more into this, because I REALLY am curious about how the hell Haarlep got a female version of Raphael, or was this something the devs just thought "We'll give them an option".

Personally, I just feel like without that knowledge, I can't see it outside of a "let's just chuck that in there so they have another option and say Raph is curious at times". But please, please let me know if you do! Some devils of Baator CAN change sex on a whim, but by disrupting the order of the Hells, they are actually punished if they do it, even tho it's entirely allowed and absolutely a-okay to do! The laws of Baator are just very stringent. Being a creature of sex, maybe it's different for incubus and succubus?

Also just a note here, you can call Haarlep he, she, or they. The Narrator, in game characters, all use he when Haarlep is male, she when Haarlep is the Archduchess, and they during some of the Narrator's comments.

Speaking of glamours, though, it has been deciphered what Haarlep's harness says in Infernal, and it says "1000 lover's in 1 body" (link to reddit).

Some people have theorised that this is part of the secret contract that Haarlep was under. Personally... I think it's for nothing but Haarlep to gloat about in the Hells. I think it's entirely an aesthetic and prideful thing and nothing more. We know the devs have scribbled infernal on contracts and it literally says nothing (looking at Raphael's lol), it's all weird junk and silly things, so it's no surprise that they've written something like this on the harness Haarlep wears. Some little inside joke, but also a boast for Haarlep.

Raphael clearly likes to see himself wearing skimpy clothes, so maybe it's even to please Raphael. Maybe it's Raphael knowing that Haarlep has slept with that many others while wearing his face? Who knows. But personally, I really don't think there is anything significant when it comes to this, it's just a good little bit of humour added into the game.

During the sex scene, you will notice that Haarlep's eyes begin to glow throughout the rest of the encounter. I also find this fascinating, and I think it likely comes down to arousal or the power of the act, which when taking the glamour, would be a form of magic or corruption.

Pre sex:

During / post sex:

They are significantly brighter, and remain that way throughout the rest of the encounter. So, could it be the use of charm? Could it be arousal? Could it be the corruption and taking your body? Either way, it's something that I found interesting and I wanted to put here also.

Once the act is done, we get back down to business. This is where you can ask if Raphael is any good in bed. Of course, this is a whoooole debate amongst the fandom, and honestly, I don't think it needs to be taken so seriously. You've got to remember, Haarlep is an incubus, someone that is forged from lust and sex, and has likely slept with waaaaay more people than Raphael (especially if we take it literally when Haarlep says Raphael only wants to sleep with himself). That's a whole different topic, though, and this is Haarlep not even elaborating, just laughing and saying "no". But you're never going to get as good in the sack as an incubus, that likely knows all the trades. This isn't just a skill, it's INSTINCT for someone like Haarlep. Even if Raphael WAS bad in bed, though... what's the big deal? Who cares? I actually think it's something that makes Raphael more realistic, because he has a flaw and someone else is better at something than him. Good, make him feel vulnerable, let him be reminded, and perhaps that is also why Haarlep is kept around, so Raphael can imagine the incubus' prowess as his OWN whilst he wears his face.

Back to where Haarlep could be seen as potentially betraying Raphael by pointing you into the direction of the Orphic Hammer. Once again, like mentioned above yonder (this is getting long), there's no telling where this is coming from. Is this a betrayal? Is this Haarlep being short sighted and not really thinking Tav and Co could kill Raphael once he came back, knowing that the HoH was rigged to attack the moment the Orphic Hammer was taken? Interesting how Haarlep disappears amidst the chaos as well.

There's no saying what Haarlep was thinking, it's all speculation and guessing games, which fits perfectly with a devil, tbh. He's a scheming little shit, just like everyone else in the Nine Hells. Makes perfect sense to me that we don't know his true intentions. Plus, it's literally a 10 minute interaction. You can't possibly understand someone with a 10 minute interaction, you can only guess and assume.

What I do find a little funny is the following:

So we have Haarlep saying that Raphael hides NOTHING from him, and can't (likely because Haarlep wears his face and potentially uses charm on him to get what he wants), but also...

Haarlep gives you the key. To. The. Safe. The safe that he doesn't know what sits inside it... (bullshit).

He literally pulls it out of his arse and just hands it to you. Flat out. So how did Haarlep get the key? Why does HE have access to it? But doesn't know what's inside the safe? Definitely bullshit. He knows what's inside it, and Raphael, who has every door locked and invitations required and a ritual to get inside his house etc... just... hands his safe key to Haarlep? Or doesn't realise Haarlep has stolen it and keeps a copy?

Either way, this line about Raphael telling him everything indicates that Haarlep and Raphael talk to each other. Which, of course they do. They have been sharing a bed for who knows how long?

The reason why I have come to it being over a thousand years of being with each other goes back to Haarlep having Raphael's much younger glamour. Raphael is 2000+ years, as we know thanks to his comment about Karsus' Folly and how he was there to see it.

Haarlep likely came after, after he raged about the Crown, and when Mephistopheles realised that his son was ambitious and wanted power. 1000+ years is a long time to share your bed with someone and not grow some sense of comfort within that company. Even without realising it or admitting it (or even being in denial), Raphael is still a half human and half devil, those weaker natures, those human natures, he no doubt falls to every now and again, no matter how much he detests and attempts to refuse it. Company is company, and if anything, this is the sort of company that feels like it's there for complacency and self gain (not realising the self loss in the process).

I am not saying Haarlep and Raphael love each other. In fact, whatever they share is likely nothing but a mutual benefit from one another somehow (and of course, Haarlep being contracted there). But love is an extremely complex notion, and it's not that simple. I don't think it's yes, and I don't think it's no. I think it's an exceptionally GREY area that has become complacency, comfort, possessiveness, and selfishness. As for Haarlep? Who is a full fiend, tho an incubus of all fiends (master of lust, sensuality, intimacy...), I think Raphael has a greater chance of falling in love than Haarlep does. And that's saying something.

We know for a fact that Haarlep was sent via Mephistopheles, but there's some conflicting dialogue that can feel like Haarlep is "sworn to" Raphael but he's a gift, so who does he really serve?

Whatever the case, I still think that Haarlep is absolutely capable of manipulating Raphael in ways that others can't. Also, if Raphael didn't really care to have Haarlep around, he could just get another incubus to have his glamour and be done with it. Haarlep can change his face to be Raphael, yes, but he can't change his personality that easily. If Raphael really hated Haarlep, he'd just go "be gone" and throw him out the window.

Obviously, as a GIFT from his father... that might hold a little bit of sentimentality to it, especially for someone like Raphael, who is obsessive and possessive of his possessions. Haarlep would be seen as his, and only his.

Then there's the indication that Haarlep is unhappy and hates Raphael as much as any other devil in Baator. Haarlep is jovial in nature, he makes fun of people, including Raphael, his supposed master. I really don't see his end letter as him hating Raphael.

As above with the quote, Haarlep states Raphael can hide nothing from him, and deny him nothing, which pretty much solidifies that Haarlep has him wrapped around his little finger. If anything, Haarlep is the one in control of whatever relationship that they share (whether that's just sexual or not). Raphael still has power, of course, but it's this dynamic that shifts up and down between them, until they are back to the very same place they always end up.

The letter that you see in the epilogue never states anything on Haarlep's feelings towards Raphael. They state what OTHER devils feel. What the letter says is:

The only indication that one might get from this is the term "timely end" when it comes to Raphael's death. I wouldn't say this is an indication of Haarlep detesting the man. Haarlep isn't known for his love, so why would he mourn to a stranger? Why would he care, really? He's a fiend. The death of Raphael meant he was no longer bound to any contract, so it's absolutely opportunistic for him! But opportunity doesn't mean hate.

The entire atmosphere of Haarlep's letter has a sense of superiority around it, which if course it does. It's Haarlep. He's a fancy little snob that thinks he has better taste when he's actually fucking gelugons on a daily basis... Have you seen those things?

I'm more interested in the contract that was bounding him to secrecy. It's never explained more upon. Was Haarlep bound to secrecy to stay within the HoH? Was he bound to secrecy so no one knew him and Raphael had slept together and that Raphael had a personal incubus? Raphael has invitations for others to come into the boudior, so I highly doubt Haarlep was some little secret shame of his. If anything, Raphael seems the sort to boast about getting to have sex with his handsome self.

The only secrecy I can get from this would be the fact that it was a secret Haarlep was keeping from Raphael that he was a spy for Mephistopheles.

Which... let's talk about this spy as well. We don't know the terms and conditions of the contract between Haarlep and Mephisto, all Haarlep claims was that he was sent to "distract" Mephistopheles' naughty son.

Doesn't really mean spy. It CAN mean spy! Absolutely it could mean spy (and the devil's in the details). But if we think about what Haarlep was potentially sending back to Mephisto... why didn't Mephisto do anything? After all, Raphael can't hide anything from Haarlep or deny him anything, and that gives me the impression that Haarlep knows most of what is going on, and if he told Mephistopheles about all of that, I'm pretty sure Mephisto would have a shit fit over the fact that his son is after the crown that has been stolen from his vault.

This is a crown that Mephistopheles KNOWS pissed Raphael off when he took it and locked it away. Raphael tells us that he raged over it for years after it happened. So when the vault was broken into, I'm pretty sure Mephistopheles would have been onto Raphael about it immediately. If Raphael came up empty handed and literally didn't know a damn thing about it, maybe... MAYBE his father would be willing to go "fine, whatever," but this is a very paranoid Archdevil that has killed his own spawn before to better himself. Raphael is no different. He is expendable. He doesn't even live in Cania anymore (HoH is in Avernus), and as far as I can tell, he's keeping all those souls to himself so he can use them to turn into an ascended form (which makes me wonder if he got the idea from his father and Cazador).

So for being a spy... Haarlep is a pretty damn poor one, if you ask me. Haarlep comes off as more of a sloth than someone who is really interested in doing hard work. He wants pleasure and games, and he is content if he has that, but he's also a fiend, and Haarlep is still as selfish as any other devil.

If you kill Haarlep, you can also speak to his corpse, where he will give you the same information just in a different way. He will tell you where the key is, he will explain that Raphael was never on top during their bedroom games, and he will tell you he was sent to distract Raphael from Mephistopheles.

I am absolutely certain I could keep going with this, but I'm running out of juice, lol. Anyway, this is my little (big apparently) analysis of Haarlep's character, and why I write him the way I do.

There is no right and wrong when it comes to this, remember. We ALL have our unique headcanons and opinions on characters, and we see all but 10 minutes or so with Haarlep in a game that lasts over 100 hours of gameplay. There is always room for character growth and development. Just because you don't agree with someone's personal hc doesn't mean they're wrong or you're right.

I would love to delve further into some more headcanons, especially with Raph, his sexuality, and Haarlep and his relationship a little bit more, but for now, this his already gotten long enough, so some small dot points:

Hope says she has been in the boudoir against her own will (which makes me believe Haarlep and her have likely shared a bed--this is apparently triggered if you save Hope before doing anything else).

Haarlep is a top in the bedroom (as provided by his own words when you speak to his corpse)

Haarlep doesn't know of any weakness Raphael has in battle (this is indicated when you speak to his corpse and ask if Raphael has any weaknesses in battle, to which the corpse remains silent and the Narrator says "the corpse does not know"). A really neat hc post about that HERE.

Incubus eat hearts and meat (Haarlep, if you agree to let him devour your soul and body) stated that he will eat your heart.

If Haarlep devours your soul and takes your mind and soul, you do not die, you become a thrall of his to command, which will obey him and "my master" (which makes me think he speaks of Mephisto more than Raphael).

Haarlep can command imps (he summons them if you decide you want to battle)

If I think of more, I will add, I'm tired now, lol. If anything, can y'all appreciate how long this got? :'D

#ooc #Haarlep #Haarlep BG3 #raphael the cambion #Meta #Lore #Headcanons

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factual-fantasy · 11 months ago

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22 asks!! :DD 💖💀🎉💖

@bunny-coffee

@elegysonnet

AAA THANK YOU SO MUCH!! AND YOOOO IM DEVOURING THIS IDEA FRFR-

There's so much sadness! So much angst! AND JEVIL COMFORTING FRISK BY MAKING HER LAUGH?? PERFECT!!!

Now I may be not able to apply this idea word for word.. but I LOVE so much about it! Would you mind if I yoinked some of this? Its great!! :DD

:DD Happy new year!🎉🥳🎉 And thank YOU for sending me a kind message! I endlessly appreciate it 💖💖

@bunny-coffee

:00 Really? Thank you!! :DD I was actually pretty unsure of that detail for Jevil.. Making him round and squishy kind'a made him look too young to me.. but I'm so glad you like it! Maybe his squishiness isn't so bad! :D

:DDD Happy new year!! 💖🎉🥳🎉💖

XD Its been a while since I watched the movie. But I think my reaction was something along the lines of:

"..oh?.... OH..?.... OH YOOOOO---" *excited for angst noises XDD*

Thank you!! :DD As for his knuckle scars, there isn't really one specific way he got them. It just shows that he's rough and tough. He's been through a lot and has been on many dangerous missions.

You know, scraping his hands on rocks, dealing with sharp teethed and dangerous creatures every day.. Your hands would naturally get beat up a lot of you lived like Kwazii.

Aww! How fun! I'm sure Foxy wouldn't mind the company! :}

Foxy: "Oh? Are you a new animatronic?"

Calico Jack: "BIG TALKIN ROBOT-"

Now usually I would say Calico Jack. And its probably still true.. but considering how I'm trying to structure my Octonauts AU.. Inkling might actually be the one who's studied up more on folk tales and mythologies.. 👀

@rockbott0m47 (huh.. in all my days I don't think I've ever received a question like this XDD)

I try to be as factual as possible.. but in all honesty, my factual stops where the lazy begins-

XDD You're welcome?? Ah- Sorry for your loss?? XD I'm not sure how you feel about this realization but none the less thank you! I'm so glad you've liked my artwork! :DD

@nevereatingpeas

:DD THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! I'm so glad you like my deign!! :}}💖

AAAAA THANK YOU SO MUCH!! 😭😭💖💖💖

(Post in question)

WAAAAAHGG THANB YIU SO MCUH!!! ITS SO COOL TO ME THAT YOU SAW ALL THOSE DETAILS!!

Yes exactly! Shellington's "VEGGIE DAD" shirt, Kwazii's bent whiskers and scars.. AND YES YES! THE CAPTAIN IN FULL UNIFORM!! I was thinking that he is an early riser and was up before everyone else was. He's not intending to eat later- he's just already had breakfast! :0

AND YES!! The meals were all correct but one <XD google says that sea otters eat crab. So I googled "crab meat meal" and drew one of the things that came up. It might be a salad thing..? Or a crab pasta thingy.?? Not sure <XDD But MAN the potatoes would have been a good idea too-

One detail that I was fond of was the steam coming from everyone's cups. Though Peso and Barnacles have no steam, because they're drinking cold drinks! You get it?? Becuase they are cold creatures?? Don't like warm things??? I'm so smart 🤣

@itschrisboys

YOOOO THIS IS A REALLY SOLID IDEA!! She could have the guilt of having killed everyone, while also trying to give everyone their happy ending.. Cool! Would you mind if I used this idea? Or at least part of it? Its really neat! :00

@britneyt

:DD Thank you! I'm glad you like that design detail of his XDD

Also thank you again! Happy new year!! 🎉🥳🎉

@beryl-shade

XD My first thought was Glamrock Freddy; "HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO HIDE YOU NOW GREGORY??"

I do! I'll have to draw them sometime-

@tallchest13-blog

Thank you! I'm so glad! :DDD

@natewithacake

:DD Thank you so much!! I'm glad you like the designs I've given them! :}}}

#my response #octonauts #undertale #deltarune #fnaf security breach

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syndrossi · 3 months ago

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resonant ch25 dvd commentary

Inspired by @cloud-harasser's ask, some dvd commentary of the latest chapter. No idea how I'm gonna be structuring these, so we'll just meander aimlessly until I settle on a format!

Favorite line: "The crown he had so coveted, she mused, had come to wear him." (Rhaenys)

Mostly because there's so much behind it. Obviously there's Rhaenys's own bitterness over the Great Council and her belief that Viserys's rule has weakened their family. But also how it has, in many ways, weakened Viserys himself. His health, his happiness, his relationship with his family. The crown consumes, if you are not strong enough--and perhaps even if you are.

In general Viserys + the weight of his crown is a subtle (or perhaps not!) theme in the chapter:

"He gladly forgot his crown when it did not suit him, only to brandish it like a sword when it did..."

"Viserys looked from Daemon to her, and then back, closing both hands around his cane, as though it were a scepter."

"His hand found his hair, as though to push back the weight of his crown, his sigh loud in the sudden quiet of the room."

"If Viserys decided to take his supper with only his crown for company, that was his own choice."

The crown constantly isolates and wearies Viserys, which is why he's constantly trying to put it down, and be just Viserys: a brother, a cousin, an uncle, a father. But to Rhaenys's point, he only puts it down and picks it back up when it suits him.

(I always worry that people think I dislike Viserys or am going out of my way to make him unlikeable, but honestly I find his struggle to be a very compelling one.)

Favorite moment: A toss-up between Rhaenys reaching for the wine to deal with this bullshit and Daemon comforting Jon by the hearth.

Favorite dynamic: Rhaenys and her cousins. Rhaenys's viewpoint of them is somewhat frozen in time (moreso Daemon than Viserys), but it's still pretty accurate. Since this story is very Daemon+Jon+Rhaegar-focused, we usually see Daemon in a very positive light, OR we see him as the ultimate villain from Alicent and Otto's POVs. Rhaenys is a fun middle ground. She is able to call attention to / muse upon his faults while still remaining fond of him.

"Quick" hitters:

This was one of the more frustrating/difficult chapters for me to write, because it took me a while to settle into Rhaenys's voice. Her POV is one of the most heavily edited scenes I've done.

I went back and forth between two versions of the boys' disappearance. There's a natural pause in the Viserys-Rhaenys-Daemon conversation (when they're talking about the Princesguard and also the Stepstones) where you could slip a scene break in. I wrote it originally from Rhaenys's POV, which is what we ultimately got, but I also partially wrote it from Jon's before deciding it was stronger to have Rhaenys's perspective. We'll save the secret passage spelunking for another time!

I originally had Jon bestow the name of his hatchling in this chapter when he introduced him to Rhaenys, but this wasn't really the appropriate place for Daemon + Rhaegar to react to it, so it got moved to 26, which is all about dragons! (The chapter is literally called "Dragonkeeping"!)

It's subtle, but Rhaegar latches on to Rhaenys hard as the first Targaryen woman he's encountered. Hugging her almost choked him up, and he was upset when she announced she'd be leaving soon.

Cut partial Jon POV scene in the secret passages (standard disclaimer that this is raw/unedited lol:

“Are we lost?” What Rhaegar had assured him was a five minute walk through tunnels beneath the holdfast to emerge in a small crypt on the edge of the garden—one of many for Queen Rhaenys, whose body had never been returned to her homeland—had become fifteen minutes of navigating tunnels that ended abruptly or in doors locked behind chains, or switches that did not work. “Much has changed,” Rhaegar said, fixing the latest dead end with a betrayed glare. “Or changed after, I suppose. Some of the tunnels must have been extended later, and chains removed.” He frowned in thought. “During the Dance, perhaps? It is not known how Aegon escaped the Red Keep.” Their plan to sneak to the king’s chamber in support of their father, exchanged in hushed whispers in Princess Rhaenyra’s chambers, was beginning to look doomed to failure. Jon followed Rhaegar back to their current tunnel, where his brother exhaled in frustration. Their hatchlings, who were entertaining themselves by zipping along the dark corridors, did not seem to mind. In fact, they seemed to rather enjoy the cave-like interior of the rougher-hewn spaces. Rhaegar held his torch up, their only source of light, turning to peer down each side of the tunnel. “There is a small passage near the tunnel to Flea Bottom that leads to the Queen’s Ballroom within Maegor’s Holdfast. I did not want to use it, because we will have to cross most of the holdfast to reach the king’s chamber. We will be spotted before we reach it.” “How far?” Jon asked. “Another ten minutes. We are on the opposite side of the Red Keep right now, nearer to the Tower of the Hand.” Jon grimaced. By the time they reached it, Laenor would almost certainly have raised an alarm, but the same was true of returning to the passage leading to Rhaenyra’s chamber. Then he remembered Rhaegar’s story from before. “Aren’t we near where the dragonglass mosaic is? Beneath the Tower of the Hand?” Rhaegar turned to him in surprise. “You wish to see it now?”

#resonant dvd commentary

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yeehawpim · 1 year ago

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What's your process in making comics

And how do you make something so good with such a simple art style!? 🥺

(if this has been asked before could you send a link to the post?)

Alright so ive been sitting on this ask b/c I already know it's a long answer aflskdjf

Write dialogue/text down in my notes app Sometimes it's just me sitting there like hghghg as music plays and I stare at my phone for 10min. Usually it's 12am thinking about stuff while I'm in bed and I type some piece of dialogue down real quick. I'm nowhere near as comprehensive as comic script I've seen online that they give examples for, like there's no direction on what's happening in panels or anyth because it's just for myself and I just sort of remember composition ideas if I have them on the spot

Literally start drawing 😂 As previously said I sometimes go into comics with comp ideas already, like for this one I knew I was going to divide the page going in. Or like I know this is gonna be 4 panels and pretty static. Other stuff I fully wing it sentence to sentence because I can't bother with thumbnailing 😅 sometimes this bites me on the ass because I spend forever drawing smth I have to toss, but I've gotten better at doing stuff fast

I use photoshop, so for vertical comics I've been following this tutorial for years

Vertical comics are a lot easier to structure composition-wise for me, I started out making those because it was less intimidating

The red arrow is your eye direction as you read it. For me it's always the bottom of a page is one less boundary to worry about. You can be less precise if the reader is automatically drawn to looking down b/c they're scrolling and never sees a full page laid out. 😂 Also if I want to pace something slower/further down I don't have to worry about having to cram it in y'know?

This might be a weirdly specific thing to mention but I'm always thinking about it when I make comics because...

lol I gotta make up for being too lazy to spend more than 30 seconds drawing a character

jkjk but yeah my interests are more in slapping the story in my head on the page. I like doing compositions and writing stuff that interests me. I get tired when I spend too much time fiddling with stuff, so if I can get smth across with a rough estimation I'm happy. This does limit the type of stories that can be told cuz certain more rendered styles just work better when you're trying to convey certain things but! there's lots of things you can do drawing simply too!

there's defs more stuff out there that doesn't follow what I'm doing, lots of different styles. Eg American superhero comics are super text-heavy and boggle my mind. This is just what I like to do cuz I like reading way too much manga/webtoons lol

you don't have to be super technical to make comics! go out there and make one if you've got an idea!

if you want to of course haha

hope this explains my process a little (thank you for the compliment it means a lot 🤠🙏)

#q&a

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cinderella-ish · 8 months ago

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Momiji, Kyo, and what it means to protect the ones we love (part 5 of 5)

From the beach arc onward, we see Kyo intentionally spending more time with Tohru. He asks her to hang out in Kyoto, he eventually agrees to be in the play, they spend the New Year together, and he does little nice things for her when he can, like washing her scarf, or giving her the paper flower when he sees how upset she is.

This isn't wildly different from S1 Kyo, of course. He's done little nice things for her right from the beginning, like going to pick her up from work in E2. But he's more intentional with it now, and he's aware of his feelings for Tohru and desire to spend time with her. He may still feel unworthy of her, but he finally accepts that his presence makes her happy, so he's willing to quash his self-hatred enough to spend time with her, for her sake.

And we see Momiji work at protecting Tohru, most notably in Ask Him For Me, when he tries to accompany her on her mission to find Kureno, and when she insists on going alone, he draws her a map, tells her to stick to the bushes and give his name if she's caught, and tails her to make sure she doesn't get into trouble as she searches for Kureno. (Just look how worried he is! And look at him getting Tohru out of there!) He sees that Tohru feels very strongly about being involved, so he does absolutely everything he can to make sure she can do so as safely as possible. We even see his memory of the night Akito scratched Tohru's cheek, just to make his worries crystal clear.

He also doesn't try to distract or manipulate Tohru when he realizes she's upset. He asks her what's wrong and listens, and he even cries with her.

Takaya also connects Momiji and Kyo in the structure of Ask Him For Me/manga chapters 74 and 75. Momiji's section of this episode is almost bookended by two appearances from Kyo.

Near the beginning, Tohru asks Kyo about Kureno, and he warns her not to go looking for trouble. And at the end, we have that rooftop conversation.

Tohru: It's only natural to want to be with the person you love, to want to be by their side, right? Kyo: What is it? Are you in love with some guy? Tohru: N-n-n-no! It's not about me! Kyo: Don't worry. When you do fall in love, you'll have my full support.

So, in this episode, we have Momiji trying to protect Tohru, and Kyo trying to cheer her up and spend time with her, a complete reversal from where they started relative to each other.

And then, Momiji grows up.

After Golden Week, a bunch of the kids gather at Shigure's house for dinner, and when Tohru notices that Kyo isn't with them, Momiji volunteers to go get him (Momiji really is always the one to invite Kyo to join everyone). In the manga, Tohru starts crying when she notices that Kyo's not with them, no doubt thinking of Kyo's upcoming confinement.

When Momiji arrives in Kyo's room, they have this exchange:

Kyo: You guys are gonna eat here, too? Momiji: It's okay, we settled on curry. Kyo: Whatever. You grew a lot, huh? Momiji: Right? Pretty soon I might be taller than you, and better looking! And then, and then... maybe Tohru will accept my proposal? Do you get that if you give up, something like that might happen? So you shouldn't give up. I'm gonna stop going, 'There's no point in thinking about this,' and giving up. Wouldn't it sting if some other guy took Tohru from you? Well, look at the time! We better go help make curry! Come on!

In the manga, it's made clear that Kyo is horrified that everyone knows he loves Tohru. He stands separate from the rest of the group at the barbecue. In the manga, he and Tohru share a cute moment of blushing eye contact.

I love how Momiji says he'll stop thinking it's pointless, too, after he encourages Kyo not to give up. In a conversation where he could have focused on the fact that Kyo is his romantic rival, he instead focuses on the fact that they both might have futures worth fighting for. They're fighting beside each other, even if they can't both be the one Tohru loves romantically.

Later that episode (or a few chapters later), Momiji's curse breaks. He now has a real future ahead of him, but he sees how Tohru looks at Kyo, and he knows that his own future won't be at her side like he wants.

Kyo: Momiji? Jeez, you're here of all places. Tohru and them are inside looking for you, so- Momiji: What? Kyo: Huh? Uh, nothing. Did something happen? Momiji: My curse is broken. Would it surprise you if I said that? Kyo: What? Listen, you- Momiji: Yours breaking would make Tohru happier than mine breaking. I'm sure she'd be happy. I mean... you know, right? I'm the one this stings. Kyo: Shut up. I don't wanna realize that. It's too...

Gosh, this scene breaks my heart every time. On both of their behalves. Momiji is dealing with his first real heartbreak, and Kyo is dealing with his extremely complicated feelings about loving Tohru, his guilt over Kyoko's death, and his upcoming confinement in the Cat's House.

It's clear Kyo cares for Momiji in this scene, and Momiji really tries to put on a happy face for Kyo, but he can't. Megumi Han does an outstanding job as Momiji in this scene. The way her voice breaks when Momiji smiles and says, "Would it surprise you if I said that?" is just crushing.

The visual storytelling is stunning, too. The wide shots, emphasizing how lonely both Momiji and Kyo are. The way the scene is composed to emphasize the distance between them. The close-ups on their faces when they're each grappling with the thing that's gutting them. The way Momiji's smiles are always immediately followed by the saddest looks. The way their solo shots mirror each other's, at the beginning, middle, and end. We also don't see Kyo's eyes between the moment Momiji says his curse is broken and when Kyo is saying, "I don't wanna realize that."

Before the beach arc, I don't think Momiji would have watched that sort of interaction from a distance, and I don't think he would have let it stop him from making plans with Tohru. He would've just wanted to make her smile and spend as much time with her as possible, even if that meant ignoring her feelings. And he definitely wouldn't have let himself feel sad. Momiji's pain in this scene is evidence of his growth.

That night, Momiji goes to speak to Akito, after having dismissed her the night before. His speech to her might be my favorite moment of the whole series. It's the climax of Momiji's arc, at the very least.

Momiji: I'm sorry I sent you home alone yesterday. I spent the whole day thinking. Wondering why my curse is gone... only mine. I couldn't think of anything that would cause it. But I can say this: Akito, I can't stay by your side for the rest of my life. And you can't tie me down anymore. [Akito slaps Momiji] Akito: Monster! Traitor. Traitor! [Akito beats her fists against Momiji's chest] Akito: If you leave here, leave me, you've got no place to go! Your mother and father won't just welcome you back! No one will! You'll never be happy! Momiji: I know. I've become so free, and so lonely. The curse breaking doesn't mean I'll get the girl I want. And the bonds that unconditionally connected me to everyone are gone. It's too late. I can't go back to before things were broken. But... but don't tell me that not having those things means I can't be happy! Don't just decide that! I feel vulnerable being free, but a happiness might exist for me! It might be somewhere in the future, waiting for me to catch up! I'm going to finally start walking along my own life's path. What about you? How long will you stay here? The person most afraid that if they leave this place, they'll have no home and no happiness... Akito: Shut up. Just shut up. Get lost. Momiji: Okay.

It's almost the credo of the whole series, isn't it? That it's better to make your own way, with no guarantee of love or happiness, than to cling to bonds that have become a burden and wish for things to never change. What Momiji's saying is what Akito needs to accept in order to be free herself.

And Momiji, despite all the loss he's suffered, despite having his heart broken that very afternoon, he's still determined to keep going.

I love this as the climax for Momiji's arc because it showcases the ways he's grown while also showing us the things that have always made him such a special character. He's standing up for himself and his future, not afraid to make Akito angry or say things she doesn't want to hear. He's acknowledging that it hurts, and that he might never have the family he so desires. But he also might.

It's a waste of time to think about loss or life getting harder. The traveler never thought about that stuff.

He still has hope, even as everything seems so dark. And he still tries to help Akito, even after everything she's done to him.

The parallels between Kyo and Akito in this episode/chapter are so well done. For both of them, the pain of moving forward is just too much right now, but Momiji still wants to see them both move forward anyway, and he's telling them this in a straightforward, mature way, rather than manipulating them.

And Momiji's not done affecting Kyo's arc.

After Kyo asks Tohru if she loves him, we see Momiji's face and hear him say, "I mean... you know, right?" Once more, it's Momiji whose voice Kyo hears at such a crucial moment.

It's painful for Kyo to finally accept that Tohru loves him. He doesn't know she already knows about his confinement, and worse still, he knows he has to tell her about the day of her mother's death.

But again, it was Momiji who led Kyo to realize that he loves Tohru in S2, and now it's Momiji leading Kyo to realize that Tohru loves him, too.

After Kyo unloads his guilt on Tohru, and Tohru falls from the cliff, it's really Yuki who gets Kyo to take the final step toward accepting Tohru's love, so I won't say much about that except to point out that Yuki says making Tohru smile was protecting her, and that only Kyo could make her smile like that.

I think this scene, where Momiji and Kagura team up to tease Kyo, is the last time we see Kyo and Momiji together. But they're still affecting each other's arcs all the way to the end.

After Kyo and Tohru get together, they visit Kyoko's grave, and Kyo asks Tohru to move away with him.

It's selfish, and it's going to take Tohru away from everyone else, but he still asks anyway. It's a very Momiji-like thing for him to do.

And then, he says this:

I'm taking her with me. You good with that? I'll keep my promise. I know I'm really late, but... I'll protect her for life. So, we're good, right?

He's taking her with him, and he'll protect her for life. He's learned from Momiji, but he's still Kyo.

As they get ready to leave, Tohru starts reminiscing and starts to cry because she'll miss everyone so much.

Kyo: Clearly you don't get it. Listen up: everyone loves you more than you think they do. So it'll be okay. This isn't the last time you'll ever see them. It's the start of a new banquet, right?

In his last appearance, Kyo hugs her and cheers her up and offers a healthy dose of optimism for their future.

And the last time we see Momiji, he's sitting at the dojo with Haru and Rin.

Momiji: More importantly, how dare Kyo take Tohru with him! I bet he just wants her all to himself. I wanna pinch him! Really hard! Haru: Why not pinch him tomorrow? Momiji: Nah, I can't do it in front of Tohru. Oh, but thanks to him, I have another dream. I'm going to find an amazing significant other, and we're gonna go visit them just to show off! So Tohru had better stay happy. She'd better keep on smiling, or I'll be disappointed.

He's complaining and getting annoyed at Kyo (and threatening light physical violence!), but he's still dreaming of a bright future for himself. And he's trusting Kyo to keep cheering Tohru up in their new home.

When I started thinking about writing this series, the point I thought I'd be making was that Momiji functioned as Kyo's mentor in Fruits Basket. But after putting these posts together, I really think it'd be more accurate to say they were each other's mentors. Their relationship has a mutuality from the start. I hope they remained close as adults.

And I really hope Momiji found an amazing partner.

Momiji and Kyo: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

Here's a plug for my fic, Bloom Within Us. It's a canon-divergent AU where Tohru dies after falling from the cliff. I've really enjoyed exploring Momiji and Kyo's relationship in that story. If you've enjoyed this series, I hope you'll check it out!

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swords-of-a-soilder · 11 months ago

Text

“And, what are you Philza?”

Missa had heard from his own son that a deity Name Rose has been watching over them, He then hears from Phil that he was reached out to another God before. That sparks the question "what are you?"

Missa rocked his legs back and forth as he sat on the edge of the tree house, with an anxious face he stared down at the Structure below him.

A kizbo of sorts surrounded by pilers, literal with roses. Mainly he focused on the floating chest in the center, that aperrantly served as a communication route.

He hadn't spoken to the deity yet, he was terrified of accidental offending her, he much rather thought his words out before Putting anything in the chest.

He would soon take note of Phil's approaching footsteps, though he wouldn't turn to meet him; Phil soon seated himself next to Missa, observing the worry look on his partner's face.

"So, this is probably a lot right now." Phil started, "If you have any questions I'd be more than happy to assist!"

Missa keep his gaze on the chest, in regards to questions he had many; he honestly wasn't even sure where to start but feared his silence would worry Phil.

Thus upon hearing Phil let out an patience sigh, he felt compelled to say something. "Who.. Who is she?" He finally asked

"Right, I'm going to simplify this for you." Phill began

"ok?"

"Rose is my Spawn entity, I was reincarnated into that world after I died in my previous one." He leaned forward clasping his hands as he too stared down at the chest. "And I wasn't sure if it was real to be honest; I thought those spaces in-between were just dreams, but her and the um end king found me so.."

"And the End king is another deity?"

"Not a good one."

"oh?!" Phil would regret mention the End kings name, once he noticed the fear in his partners voice.

"But you don't have to worry about that," he clearifided, "Rose will protect us."

"Ok.. and what did you mean by in-between spaces?"

"in-between worlds..the..where I..where Rose spawned me, they were different layers that lead between different worlds and.. how do I break this down.."

Missa finally looked up at Phil, he'd observed him seemingly rock his brain for a quick explanation. Eventually Phil pulled his backpack closer and ramaished through it, he then pulled out a tres leches cake.

"Ok, so." He pointed to the top of the cake, "imagine this is where I spawned, even though I exist up here I can still go," he moved his finger back and forth between the other layers, "between the other layers through void rips and the entities they can go wherever they want basically."

"Mm si.." Missa agreed, "and how did you get there?"

"Missa, Rose spawned me in."

Missa regret his choice in words once he picked up on the slight annoyance in Phil's tone, he didn't mean to make him repeat himself, it was just difficult to find the right words.

"I mean, why, for what reason did Rose put you there?"

"oh," he relaxed his muscle, "well I died in my old world, I guess she wanted to give me a second chance, it wasn't the first time something like that happen." Phil broke of a layer of the tres leches cake then hand it off to Missa, whom appected it grateful.

Phil tilled his head as he thought briefly to himself, "that's not that strange right? We respawn here."

"yes but, you come back as yourself in the same world you died in and they're circumstances where you just won't come back." Missa explained.

He then broke a piece of the cake which he popped in his mouth, "Sólo estoy tratando de entender las reglas". He explained with a full mouth.

Phil shurgged his shoulders, then processed to pick at the remainder of the cake. "It's pretty much the same, just over different worlds."

"you don't even have any childhood memories, Cellbit Y bagi Crecieron en esta isla, ¿Qué pasa contigo?"

"I don't really have any childhood memories." Phil explain, his eyes slowly swing to the opposite direction, it was clear he was uncomfortable with the direction of the questions.

Missa had half a mind to drop the conversation all together, but as much as he loved his husband he knew nothing of him, where he came from, why he came here; If he was allowing questions this would be the best time to ask right?

"Philza, please take no offense to the question I'm going to ask." Missa requested

Phil released a nervous chuckle, "um..ok?"

"What excalty are you?"

"What do you mean..?" He adjusted his position to sit upright, "I'm a bird mate, birdman, crow Father whatever those fuckers." He pointed to the crows seated in the branches about him. "Call me."

Missa stared at the crows briefly before turning his attention back to Phil; annoyance now painted Phil face, yup he was certainly sleeping in the petting zoo this time. "I think what I meant to ask was, Where did you originally come from?"

Phil's face went through a sequences of emotions, from annoyance to curiosity, then to confusion and horror as he became awear of one painful fact.

"You don't have to answer, don't worry about it. Lo siento, fue una pregunta extraña."

"I don't know..." Phil finally answered, "I've just always existed, I've never thought about it.."

'Ay dios mío, I married a God', Missa thought to himself as he processed Phil statement, of course Phil called it reincarnation but to have no memory of a childhood and just existed in different times, then he was more akin to a God than someone who just happened to remember his past lives.

A rather tragic God at that, if he couldn't remember his origins, but no normal being just exist without any memory of where they came from.

"is that unusual?" Phil inquired

"Ah, I just wanted to know." Missa successful dodge the question, "we're married and I don't know anything about you, it's not fair you know haha.."

Phil stared at his partner, it was true he knew very little of him and even after Missa had told him so much about himself, why he frequently went on journeys who he was before that.

Yet the only explaination Phil had for himself was, he always existed; he couldn't help but feel awful for his unsatisfactory answer. He leaned forward letting he arms rest in his lap, he himself then glared at the floating chest below them.

"You should talk to Rose, I want you to meet her." Phil attempted to change the subject.

"ha, I'm really worried I'm gonna offend her." Missa admitted, he couldn't help but feel this was like meeting the parents, and if that's true then he really didn't want to fuck up.

"Nah mate, Rose is really hard to offend, she'll love you.. I'm sure of it." Phil ended with a sad smile.

They sat there a little longer, feeling the cool wind as well as Indulging on the sweet smell of roses; perhaps he'd ask Rose for advice on how to communicate better with his husband.

#Fanfiction #qsmp #qsmp fanfiction #q!missa #q!philza #hcs4 rose #child of the sky #deathduo #pissa fic

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