#i'm not super nice to him in this one sorry
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Probably shouldn't speak on it for my own peace of mind but I will because I wanna say it. Some of yall need to let ppl have hcs 😭 More specifically the ones that don't make your fav character as nice as you want them to be.
Yknow what this is specifically about punch out where arguable theres like. Barely any characterization besides bare bones. And people know that but also don't for some reason
Like hc Aran Ryan as a super soft dude who's idk secretly rlly sensitive and no one bats an eye, hc him to be a cheater and society goes WILD
Like oh "why does he have to be a cheater just because he cheats in the ring—" BECAUSE WHY NOT???? God forbid i have fun with a story of him being a cheater because he's scared of any kind of commitment so he actively sabotoges his own relationships to the point he's so used to it that anything else seems foreign. Also I'm sorry but that man looks insane he has broken laws and I could see it going either way on whether or not infedility is something he adds onto the list. Maybe when he was younger and stupider.
Like what if I wanna make these boxers a bit of an asshole???? Asshole characters are fun to draw/write and I'm not trying to go out and say it's canon or say he's for sure a bad person or he totally can't be gentle with his partner.
Like I don't wanna say too much cuz im just the same but sometimes people take things too personally and punch out is one of the last fandoms to argue about correct or incorrect characterization 😭 for every yin there's the yang and im the yin ig
Tldr: as long as the hc isn't like. Morally and legally reprehensible who cares.
#punch out#only using one punch out tag#prolly shoukdnt cuz i dont want this to be the next big discourss#and probably wont tbf cuz its so benign#this also goes out to the ppl who cry mischaracterization#then do it themselvez#not saying i dont i do it to hell and back#i just know not to be the pot to call the kettle black#like no von kaiser is not macs parental figure#along with bald bull and glass joe#but i can do what i want
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Sigh.. Another TCC related rant 🙏 a lot shorter but just some quick stuff I wanted to talk about
(Really just about the people on the app and in the community)
Making friends who are also tcc is so hard it's either cornballs, edgelords, or the most senstive people on earth. Like one how are you gonna be THIS sensitive about such little things when you're on the worse part of the internet. Or people who will be rude asf and then get mad cause someone's mean to them, like man up and grow a pair. How can you be surprised that there's bad people in a community based around mass killers and shooters? It just never makes sense.
But edgelords actually URK me to my core, like I'm so sorry but your ass is NOT Eric... I know I talk about columposers a ton but they just make me super mad. We don't need anymore school shootings, it's not a competition and you're just making a fool out of yourself. I think Columbine and couple other shootings were all we needed and to get past but there's just more and more each year. Its always by some edgelord found their dads gun and just so happens to know what Columbine is. And like I've said before their manifestos are all the same some fuckin "They're all gonna feel my wrath 👿"
No they aren't... you're gonna end up injuring two people and then just shooting yourself, shut up. Sometimes the shootings aren't just Columbine based and some are caused by serious illness but I feel like we should get those checked out before anything. Like if your child is clearly showing signs that somethings wrong then I don't know, maybe talk to them? Take them to a doctor? Call someone? Many shootings could be avoided this way or just simply putting metal detectors inside schools that face a lot of threat. Now I know that me just saying this won't do anything for the world and this is just me ranting.
On the same topics of edgelords I also hate two specific people, first one is the like cannibal97 guy or whatever his name is. The guy whose convinced he's Eric and people in his anon sections who are like "ohemgee you make me wet >_<" WHAT. Excuse me.
And he's always flirting with them, if someone (an anon may I add) starts flirting with you and you are 17 and older then don't respond. Because you might be talking to a minor or someone much younger than you, because I know a lot of people are 13-14 and it's weird if they're talking to a 17-19 year old. Then there's the argument of "Well the younger person sent it and/or it was anonymous,". Yes but you (a 17-19 year old AKA a grown adult with basic thinking skills) shouldn't reply because it was probably anonymous for a reason, maybe because they didn't want you to know their age.
The second person is the Dylann roof fan who's user is 88aryan-2 and she's a white girl and says the n word and just seems like a rude person in general. Like you are not Dylann's top gal buddy 🙏. He's not gonna be released from prision and shown your rainbow dash tumblr account and suddenly say "Wow!! She's just like me fr! Maybe I should talk to her!" This is not a drama show, this is Tumblr out of all places.
Now I don't mind Dylann roof fans because most of them talk about the fact that he's a bad person which is good but when you're just acting like him it's just kind of cringe. I feel weird when someone on here says the n-word because you can never fact check if they're actually black (this is coming from a white guy, I don't have much room to talk)
In general I just don't like a lot of people on here or in this community because most are rude or just bad people or just straight up hard to talk to and be around. Of course there's awesome and kind people on this app and I love talking to people who are like actually nice people and understand where I'm coming from. But it's always the people who only think racism and Columbine are the only funny things. I know I'm kind of a boring person but some of these people actually have the personalities of dried Mac n cheese. Please get an orginal or just better personality, find a cool game or a fun hobbie or better friends, maybe just find friends in general.
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"Well.... looks like I screwed up a bit. Yeah, I'm sorry I haven't posted in over a year, I know you were all super excited to see my journey in college and found my transition very inspiring! I wanted to make more trans girl thirst trap content, too of course..... But I made the mistake of going to university in Utah! Oops. First mistake, I didn't pack any of my medicine. I know, college trans girls' like number one accidental detrans mistake. But my mom always prepared my medicine so I never even thought twice after I got out to college and all my other routines were new, so I didn't notice! At first....
A month goes by and my cock is suddenly three inches longer and I get frequent, almost painful erections that I need to run off and deal with. I was actually doing what all these bat-shit insane grifters said we trans girls do, which was going into the girls' room to jerk off. Ughhh it was so embarrassing. Thank God the other girls understood when they heard me do it. But soon my voice started to crack and I got stubble. My roommate told me it looks like I'm detransing. I panicked and went to the student resource center to request my new meds.
They sat me down and told me hrt is banned in Utah for anyone under 25! I was totally floored. I asked if they could make an exception and they wrote me a script for testosterone, dick growth pills, and muscle building supplements. I told them there was no way I would take them, even though I was kinda intrigued, and my cock got hard when I read the scripts..... The doctor said I'd be dropped from the college insurance plan if I defied medical ordinance. Soooo long story short: I got detransed by my college. It actually hasn't been too bad. I've gotten like half my sorority pregnant, so that's fun. And they love to worship my cock now that it's over a foot long and as thick as my wrists used to be as a 'girl'.
My breasts completely deflated and shrank after a couple months on T and working out. I still wear cute tops but they're basically not even A-Cups or B-Cups. They're just pecks. My big, puffy, suckable nipples shrank back to a set of guys' nipples, showing what a silly illusion my big fat titties always were.... I'd say I'm getting them removed but they're already gone, honestly. A lot of my bone structure changed, but I'm still kinda pretty if I wear makeup and remember to shave. Not that I ever looked quite like a girl! As my family used to love reminding me as they encouraged my to attend college in Utah, that I don't really pass well and just look like a boy with boobs. I 100% agree and my doctor used to say the same thing before I moved here, that he doesn't think I look much like a girl at all! The doctor at the student resource center chuckled when I told him I was a trans girl and said he never would've guessed that I was supposed to be a girl!
Everyone's been so supportive since I started getting detransed by my college, almost nobody calls me she/her or tries to pretend I'm a girl, especially now that I sound like a boy, instead of just looking like one! My family is ecstatic that I'm getting detransed and couldn't be more thrilled. I still dress fem and allegedly I'm only allowed at the sorority because the college is loving how pregnant I'm keeping the girls there. But it looks like my days as a fakegirl are numbered! What should I do? Be a sissy femboy or just embrace being a guy? Grow out my beard? Keep bulking up? No more makeup, maybe I should even cut my hair finally. Thanks to my amazing family for encouraging me to come here, especially my awesome mom who 'forgot' to mention my meds, who got this awesome dentrans journey underway! Love you all, hopefully more fakegirls get sent here, spread the word! It'd be nice to watch more confused boys with fat breasts get injected with T and forced to get super muscular! ❤️"
#mtf detrans#fakegirl#detrans kink#detransition kink#forced detrans#breast shrinking kink#breast deflation kink#mtftm detrans kink#mtftm jackoff fuel#mtftm detrans#mtftm kink#mtf boy
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Link Click Bridon Arc Episode 5 Thoughts
These are a mess. I wrote as I watched the episode loll.
I'm going to be so fr. Lu Guang casually admitting he had a a father is amazing. So long of wondering what he was like as a kid, if he had parents at all, just for him to so casually be like "was 7 once. Had dad. Dad noticed powers."
Cheng Xiaoshi is having the same reaction I would have to learning I have powers. I, too, would believe I was an anime hero.
"We won't be able to bear the consequences." Sounds like they were definitely changing the past in the first timeline and were found out.
THE RULES!!! Why are his pink sunglasses back 😭😭😭.
Lu Guang is casually lying about how he knows all this information lmaoo. I do really want to know how long it took them to figure everything out the first time. Did they high-five one day, and suddenly Cheng Xiaoshi was gone???
NOT THE SAD ROMANTIC MUSIC KICKING IN THE MOMENT HE BRINGS UP HIS PROMISE.
Love that we're already setting up the plot point that Cheng Xiaoshi cannot have a nice time while diving. Just immediately being bullied.
Cheng Xiaoshi you're lovely, but your English skills are not good enough to pass this exam at the level you need to I am so sorry.
Using C for all is a viable strategy, Lu Guang is a killjoy.
WAIT. WHAT. THAT WAS SO HIS DAD. HELLO???
IT IS AHHHHHH. WHAT. WHAT THE FUCKKK. Bad news about his mom's guidance, btw.
Honestly, pop off Cheng Xiaoshi. You have every right to be angry.
IS THAT BABY XIA FEI?!?! THAT WAS TOTALLY BABY XIA FEI!!!
WHAT!!? Do not go to Vein???? Lu Guang, that guy is the reason you're HERE.
LMAOOOO. YOU LOOK TASTYYY. Nvm stick with Vein I'm having a great time.
"Involved" as in super gay? Yeah, they are. They really are. You should see the way they pushed the beds in their hotel room together.
VEIN NO. He's a taken man. You have Xia Fei.
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My new favorite Halenthir idea:
Haleth does battle, meets Caranthir, feels some feelings, heads west per canon and eventually reaches Brethil...and becomes acquainted with Finrod Nom Felagund as he tries to talk his kinsman into letting the Haladin settle in the area.
At some point, Haleth and Finrod are talking and he compliments her on her mastery of elvish languages, and she's like "oh yeah, the lord of Thargelion and his people taught us". (Note: this is not the AU where Caranthir only teaches them Quenya.) And Finrod's like, "hey, that's my annoying grumpy cousin!"
And they chat about Caranthir a bit, because Haleth also thinks Caranthir is annoying and grumpy and is willing to joke back and forth with Finrod on the subject, but she's not willing to go along with it once she feels that Caranthir is being insulted/mocked. And somewhere along the line Finrod clocks that "oh, there's something going on here".
Which is confirmed when, at one point, she mentions that Caranthir wanted her to stay and as good as proposed marriage.
She's about to reel off her usual list of rationalizations for why she couldn't possibly have, but Finrod gets there first with "oh, but of course it was for the best in the end that you left him, elves and Men are just too [dramatic gesture] metaphysically different to ever be together, it's always destined to end in tragedy", and basically tries to Athrabeth her.
Except that Haleth doesn't particularly care to be Athrabethed. Like, yes, she made the choice to do what needed to be done for her people instead of what she maybekindasorta wanted, but that was her choice. She's not really into this smarmy know-it-all elf patiently explaining to her like she's a child that she can't have Caranthir because ~*Fate*~ said so.
And, well, her people have a safe home now. Her sister-in-law will make a good enough peacetime leader until her nephew is grown up.
So she gathers the Haladin, explains what she's going to do. Most of them, naturally, opt to stay in Brethil, but a few adventurous or Thingol-averse sorts join her on the trip she ends up making back to Thargelion.
Where she marches up to Caranthir and essentially says, "I'm going to marry you to spite your irritating blond cousin."
Which is the best reason Caranthir has ever heard of for doing anything.
(They're married for like seventy years and ridiculously happy and in this one, Caranthir's brothers find out fairly early on because he won't stop sending smug letters to Finrod every year with updates on his marriage to his amazing adaneth wife and sketched peredhel baby pictures and so forth.)
#silmarillion#halenthir#caranthir#haleth#finrod#i'm not super nice to him in this one sorry#i do like him in general i think he's a good person#i just disagree with his elf x human philosophy strongly#also this is filtered through haleth so...#just...my peak halenthir vibe is that once they're past bickering phase and on the same page#they are defiantly happy together specifically to spite the rules and norms and naysayers
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the funniest thing that always happens to me is that every time we have a customer who doesn't speak polish and they ask me if i speak english i'm like "no, i don't think i do" only to realize a few minutes later that i do, in fact, speak english
#maybe it's because i'm just always super anxious about my skills#or maybe it's the fact that it barely happens so i don't have many opportunities to talk to people in english#so when somebody asks me about it i'm always like “um i do speak english but just a little”#and yet here i am running a fucking blog where i write a lot of shitposts every single day#all of them in english#it's so funny to me cause obviously no one knows this#and i had a customer today and he bought diamond earrings for his girlfriend and our entire conversation was in english#and he even complimented me at the end which was very nice#and my manager was like “oh you speak english? i only understood him when he said bye bye” LMAO#YES LOOKS LIKE I DO SPEAK ENGLISH AFTER ALL#jdsfjewhif i'm sorry i never really talk about this but today i feel like i want to#like every single time i have a conversation in english i'm so fucking proud of myself for being brave enough to speak another language#in front of a stranger#i know i make a lot of mistakes but still#i'm always so fucking proud of myself. for no reason. i just am#anyway the guy was really nice and i guess it's safe to say he made my day#which doesn't happen very often i usually hate my customers#so yeah#i say whatever and whatever that i want*
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Go off queen
It's your blog and you should be able to talk about whatever you want after all
aww thank you 🥺 i appreciate it <33
i do really not like spreading negativity esp when it's on a topic i have strong feelings about, and let's say the D.A fandom especially tends to be. extreme about the way it reacts to people disagreeing with them.
And look. I'm not immune to it because sometimes i get caught up by the genuinely rancid vibe in the fandom as well, and i think those games are designed for us to have strong feelings to start with.
but it also means i don't want to go too deep into controversial thoughts because i genuinely don't want to get to a point where i'll see someone screenshot my posts to dunk on it and say i'm the reason media literacy is dead and why the fandom is so toxic (citing things i've actually seen on said blog, for instance though not directed at me but at takes i've seen taken out of context. except i knew the context so knew this was a bad faith argument.).
Like can't even dislike shits in peace in here.
#sorry this is probably my most solas moment but i try to be kind and stuff#and when i discuss things level headed with people i do think i'm pretty humble#i don't think i have the ultimate readings and i am likely super wrong about things all the time#because analysis remains also an emotional approach and it can't be helped#and i need to hold on to this humility to not get caught on in my own head#analysis is also pretty much shapped by experience and i do not have the final reading on things#and sometimes things can be decent in one way but fumble another#and what will be important to not fumble will be different from one person to the next#depending to the themes that resonated with you to start with#but when i see people dunk on feelings i have while taking them out of context and also being rude about it#and then saying 'media literacy is dead'#i feel myself turning into a pride demon on the spot#sorry i only have two literature analysis diplomas i graduated from in two languages with praises for my analytic skills#and with a teacher genuinely begging me to continue advanced literature analysis classes because my approach was rare and precious#so clearly i don't know what i'm talking about at all and i'm the idiot here#like holy shit. lol.#this fandom is still the one i dislike the most and alas the fact i dislike the 4th game doesn't help#bc i really was hopeful and optimistic about it! i didnt want to dislike it!!!!#but i at least don't want to be taken for an idiot for it#but coughs. anyway. so that's one of the reason i'm not petty on main#the real reason is i don't want to impose that on my followers. I don't like being negative needlessly.#the second reason is that if i'm met with hostility where someone act like i'm dumb i will do things i will regret.#It's just that no one saw this side of me there most time because you've all been nice to me here#again. this is my solas moment. one of the reasons my therapist goes ���� when i talk about him#ichareply#anonymous#ichasalty
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the art is Taking Its Time so in the meanwhile here's some things I've been working on
#silm#silmarillion#wip#<- let us hope the WIP Curse does not again befall me#mostly bc one of these is for feanorian week and the other is also for someone#i am trying to tackle feanor into a piece for melestasflight but He Will Not Go#i havent managed to draw him in like three months aaaa#i have so many ideas for him and he does Not Want to cooperate with me#on the other hand lomion is very friendly!#finrod is usually my go to when the characters dont want to work w me#he is very nice and polite#except tol in gaurhoth finrod. he takes so long to draw whyyy#but so far reverse gondolin lomion and idril are super easy to work with so thats great#i have ideas for maglor but right now all he wants to do is this one speicfic au so i'm stuck with that for now#im sorry i promise the maedhros maglor week stuff is still floating in my to do list#but maglor is Demanding his own au#probably after seeing the reverse gondolin one lol#and feanor is hiding in a corner like a feral cat so :/#not artblock but worse: the *characters* are Busy Experiencing The Horrors and cannot come out today sorry
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god, i suck at mario 2. i'm disparaging my legacy.... seriously, how the fuck have i beaten the lost levels without save states but can't get past 1-3 in american mario 2???? why am i not instantly good at a game i've never really played, god!!!! my mother would be disappointed in me
post writing the tags turtle here: i started rambling about my childhood made the tags longer than the actual post and don't feel like putting them onto the actual post because that'd be too much work and i'm feeling lazy. read em if you want personal bullshit! or don't. i'm not care
#one of the few luxuries we had growing up was a super nintendo#it was pretty much exclusively my mom's. and some of my earliest memories are watching her play super mario all stars and a link to the pas#she only specifically ever played mario 2 and 3. i never saw mario 1 or the lost levels as a kid#guess they're not as replayable to her. she says she's beaten both once#for some reason i remember playing a fair amount of donkey kong country. we had all 3 of them#i think as a kid i got farthest in the 3rd one? always got weird vibes from that one but it was still fun#growing up *my* home console was an N64. mom didn't really like it for whatever reason so it usually lived in my room#i still remember buying majora's mask from a toy store that's not in business anymore. i think that was one of my only games that wasn't a#hand-me-down. i think it was that and turok rage wars#as far as i remember everything else was given by a relative or a relative's boyfriend or something#still don't know where a lot of them went#i used to have the tony hawk games on there. and i think i remember gex? i think those were my cousins boyfriends stuff#i guess he took em back at some point#last i heard about that cousin she was in jail wacked out on drugs#i remember her boyfriend being a good guy. i think she got him on drugs or something. bad influence i guess#i hope he's doing better now. as an adult i'd say he's too good for her#or maybe i'm just nostalgic for one of the only positive male figures i had as a child. hell if i know#tags are now longer than the actual post. i don't feel like movin em to the post now. too much work#oh well! such is life#or as the franch say... Say Luh V!#i hope reading that made a francophone physically hurt. i hope they feel pain because of me#sorry that's not very nice. i'm not gonna delete that though.
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um. hey
#sorry for earlier...... i just got super mad idrk why fkshjdjs#anyways the amusement park was nice!#we bought cotton candy and my brother saw me kinda sad so he started talking abt pokemon interesting facts :]#and then in return i told him the plot of that one swsh fic i rlly like >:3 he seemed interested at least fjhsjsk :')#so yeah....... not feeling bad anymore i think! that was just tenporal i'm ok now 👍👍
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.
#tag talk#as much as I hate to see the social cinema grow as I get new followers. we're at a good and satisfying number. and I like that#also also also. I've introduced a friend to Hannibal (tv show) and he's loving it and I'm so happy cause none of#of my other friends have been able to stomach the body horror. so it's super cool to find someone to hype over it with#another random story that I genuinely can't remember if I said already. got told by a kid in minecraft that he's smiled a lot more around me#which. huge compliment. genuine honor to make people happy and smile and laugh#people don't laugh enough. we don't smile enough. be happy or die. and I'm too powerful to die. been there. haven't done that#cry and then laugh and then punch as hard as you can.#got to visit some of my favorite residents from the nursing home I first worked at. lotta new staff but my three favorite nurses are still#which is nice. I cried when I left that job because even though it crushed my soul I loved my coworkers and most of my residents.#I get why some healthcare workers grind themselves to the bone for the job. you're making such a huge difference in people's lives.#I tried but didn't have the fortitude for it. but it's nice to be able to go back and say hi to the friends I made and see how things are.#anyway. sorry for being weird like.. one or two weeks ago. I think things are settling out again. moving is rough but we're making it work#It's been a lot of Lear again lately. especially while being at my parents house. he doesn't mind being deadnamed as much sooo....#idk. at least one of us is capable of surviving the dmv and the state medicaid website. heaven knows I can't manage.#trying to stop using him as a crutch for getting things done has just resulted in us not being able to get things done.#but I don't want to be someone else I want to be me. I don't want to be the armor I want to be the human inside.#I don't want to live defensively. pushing everyone away. I can't do that.#anyway. we're back home! and work is on the horizon. hopefully this job works out cause I don't want to have to apply for new jobs.#the hr rep is a man at this store and I immediately got set on edge and our voice dropped as I stepped back.#then we introduced ourselves with the wrong name and he got confused and I just felt stupid about it#but how am I supposed to know which name he's been told. he didn't even use our paperwork name. Anyway that was a disaster#but we're on track and embarrassment is not a setback but a feeling about the way things progress. and it is progress we're making
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You know what? I think we all need to start gatekeeping some townies and premades a little harder lmfao
#I know some of you will say I'm TAkiNg tHinGs tOo SeRIOuS!!! and LeT PeOPle PlaY HoW ThEY WaNT but idgaf!!!#I truly can't handle some of the 'makeovers' I see on here#'Makeovers' meaning just taking fat sims and making them skinny and/or lightening every POC's skin color. Bffr.#But I get AT LEAST one anon every other week berating me for having the AuDaCitY to 'change Erwin too much' by making him trans. Give me -#a fuckin break.#Stop whitewashing townies/premades!#Stop removing their cultural identities!#and for Christ's sake... stop making the very few plus-sized premade sims skinny.#Not to mention how some of ya'll have turned the native chestnut ridge townies into -#westernized caricatures. The only knowledge some of you have about Native Americans is through#old ass children's books and poorly aged Disney movies...and it shows!! So many super harmful stereotypes everywhere!!!#Or let's talk about how some of ya'll will take a more butch or masc-presenting sim and ultra-feminize them every. single. time.#I HATE it. I hate it and I'm not sorry!!! It's just flat ass wrong and this is my 'nice' way of telling some of you.#I have the time today and I am going to bitch about this until I die#It's okay if I piss off the 'It's not that deep crowd' because it is that deep. If you'll erase the identities of pixelated fictional -#characters or change a marginalized identity to fit your 'aesthetic...' well that says a lot about how you view those identities IRL!#Hope this helps.#I'm not trying to pretend I am perfectly woke or whatever! I'm learning all the time!#But some of ya'll don't even try. It's not that hard to do a Google search or go to the library or just like... use critical thinking.#simblr#ts4
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call the hairdresser and call the mediator because the way i'm splitting to the fucking ends right now
#babes i'm so sorry about it i'm SO sorry about it but i don't think we can blame this one on the period craziness anymore#i've not even been that mentally ill lately but my friend said we like can't hang out before he goes back to school#AND my sister doesn't want to hang out tn and i'm genuinely like? i'm going to break my fucking phone#like okay i'll just kill myself. whatever. i'm becoming super fucking toxic it's really bad#obviously i don't say this shit this is internal i'm not gonna push for anything that's super fucked#but like. ohhhh my God the rage i'm feeling right now. i need to kill someone#literally why am i like this. no explanation no anything i'm just like this? who fucked me over though like what happened#what's my tragic backstory i've got nothing i'm literally just crazy#he's not even answering my fucking texts anymore like tell me to die. pussy. do it. do it! fuck w me right now#and i was so nice i literally was like. hey no worries how's your summer been what's been going on!#i'm watching more youtube within the last 10 minutes of checking my phone i've almost thrown up and thrown it twice#do you think people try to fuck me over. do you think that's a thing. like they're testing me#if you showed me some of my old online friends right now the way i would rip them into pieces#my girlfriend's been pissed lately too like it's my two best friends riding for me and nobody else#oh he replied fucking great. shooting myself in the head i'm so manic pixie for this i'm so fixing him right now#i'm not he's got a girlfriend. but like. whatever. could've been me & i think about that when i'm mad#i do not like him but me and her are literally the exact same she's just prettier and smarter and i'm more of a good person#not right now though. i need to loop someone gets hurt from mean girls until i'm fucking normal#neg#vent#suicide tw
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things r goin places maybe
#mini trauma dump on the guy i've been taking to#he said he didn't mind lol#he tried his best to comfort me but was not exactly super helpful#not at all hurtful either though#still very early days of like.... what's the line lol#where's this goin idk#but he said my butt looked nice in my instagram story so i don't think that's platonic 😂😂#actual flirting is happening now#nice#i did give him my number though and he literally just.... didn't text me😂#so like basically no ? 😅#i'm so confused#i feel like i need to tag this experience as i tagged the previous one#what should i tag it..#tiktok guy#??#talking to tiktok guy#?#idk#sorry#lol
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where do i even start. two people in love, but that are hurting. two people who meet each other and are in need of love and happiness, (“do you think you weren’t loved enough?” “somewhere between ‘not enough’ and ‘not at all’. i was always hungry for love. just once, i wanted to know what it was like to get my fill of it… just once. but they never gave that to me. never, not once.”). they’re in need of love; the kind of love that reassures them that they are a person. they are a living, breathing human worthy of love. that nothing of their past defines them, there is always the chance to grow. the kind of love that reassures them they are not hated by the world, but that they are loved. and they find that in each other (“i want to hold this moment. i want to believe it. i want his love to have enough salt in it to float me. i don’t want to be swimming for my life.” -frankissstein) they are two people who have been drowning in silence for so long, but then they find each other. and they keep each other afloat. with promises to keep on living and promises that they will always be there for the other. that they will never leave. that they are there to stay. and sometimes one person is all that you need. iwa and y/n have the type of relationship where they cover the other’s ears when it gets too loud, the kind of relationship where they run into the others arms every moment they get. they know each other like the back of their hands, they know what sets the other off and they always know what the other needs. and when they finally retire to bed after a long night of living, and they let down their walls and they finally say it, “i’m so tired.” the other is there to hold them, saying “i know, love. but it’s going to be okay.” and it will be, because they have each other.
ways to live: h. iwaizumi
he’s depressed. she’s depressed. it’s all they ever talk about. she’s willing to try anything to feel better. he’s less optimistic
pairings: iwaizumi x f!reader
status: completed, uploading all the chapters today & then disappearing again
tags/warnings: online friends to lovers, blended smau (every chapter has written parts), university au, mini-series, happy ending, hurt/comfort, lots and lots of frank discussions on mental health, depression tweets, casual discussions of suicidal ideation (no death or sh), disordered behaviors, recovery
taglist: i’m not doing one please do not ask to be added
prologue: the list
chapter one: exercise
chapter two: nurture yourself with good nutrition
chapter three: connect with a support system
chapter four: help yourself by helping others
chapter five: demonstrate gratitude
#bless the world for reminding me of a tag game we both did forever ago that asked what ur favorite color was#i wanted to do ur favorite color as the other color for this reblog#AND IT WAS GREEN#so i did a lighter shade of iwa's eye color <3#sorry i yapped SO MUCH#and also i literally had so many feelings about this smau#i don't think my moodboard does it justice at all#THERE IS SO MUCH I COULD'VE SAID#but i just really don't want to get overspecific or accidentally vent or get super depression-y or anything#so i'm so sorry if anything is inaccurate#just know i felt so much more than what i wrote in that desc#also it's the way for me that you just write iwa so consistently#i kept wanting to write things and then i'd be like “wait hold on i've already said that somewhere”#and it's because i have because you just always write him so well and perfectly#you characterize him perfectly like i'm always reading about the same iwa if that makes sense#idk how to explain it#ily eggy#i was feeling slightly lazy but i sent back and re emailed myself the inked pictures so i could resize them so they'd all be nice and 1:1#so that if you decide to use any of my moodboards they look uniform <3#and you are worth all of that#i would re email all of these images and write everything from scratch again for you and your works#i think you're amazing <3#also i'm sorry!!! aa i was supposed to do songs that reminded me or each smau as i went but i totally forgot </3#i think i'll put it in the tags for each one!!#i'm feeling two songs#this feeling will pass by take care#not bc of the lyrics exactly but bc of the title and pacing of the song <333#and gb eating gb whilst listening to gb by crywank ooooof what a song it may not be your vibe i'm sorry </3
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Well. That was. Unexpected? Lmao
#spyder#tmi lol#like babe i know you like to define yourself to fit your chosen labels n not the other way around but. you're 100% a switch#sorry to be the one to tell you i guess#i don't even like him lol i was gonna just fuck w/ him a bit but#i'm not a piece of shit who skips aftercare n that always gets me kinda affectionate so......that was super fucking weird lmao#anyway pls don't freak out n take it out on someone else cause i'm gonna feel like it's my fault#one of these days i'm gonna top him. my final victory.#no i'm not gonna be normal about this i'm not THAT nice#spdrvent
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