#i'm just way too busy with school and church to work on replys

[ireceived-p8250000]

July 21-27, 2013

Sunday, July 21

Started my shift at 10, but first, I had breakfast at Hill Station Café and enjoyed my time there. Business was slow today. Justin came by the shop, and we talked about the reporting. I gave him the copies.

Monday, July 22

Had a long quiz for Chemistry.

In PE4 Volleyball, I teamed up with Hollmae, and I realized how much I suck at it.

During lectures, Mansoor and I sat at the front because of my myopia.

"Are you two a couple?" Ma'am Mylene asked.

We both shook our heads, but our blockmates insisted we were a pair. We denied it.

I started thinking about what it would be like if we became a couple. I had an agreement with Djang and the girls that I'd pay ₱700 if we became a couple within the year of the agreement, which expires next year on March 27.

I stayed in school for our org meetings. We have a seminar to attend on Saturday and discussed the shirts, which will be ready at the beginning of August. We also talked about volunteer activities and the soiree, which will be in the second trimester. Samuel and I discussed the reporting.

Later, I talked to Mansoor, but Hollmae came along, reminding me of our plan to go to the church thingy. I went with her, and Mansoor picked me up at 9.

"I was wondering, do you still want to be in a relationship?" I asked him.

He was quite shocked. "Oo, if it's okay."

"Yeah, me too. Pero ano--I had this stupid agreement with Djang and the girls. I would pay ₱700 if we became a couple within the year of agreement."

"Kailan expiration?"

"Next year, March 27 ata. We have to hide it till then."

"Hmm sige. Kaya pa itago yan. Let's just deny kasi you agreed eh."

"Eh, I didn't expect eh, I thought we will change our minds."

"So does this mean we are in cahoots in a romantic relationship?"

"In cahoots, really?"

"So ano?"

"Oo. We are officially entering a social contract. You will be my boyfriend, and I'll be your girlfriend."

"Let's shake on it?"

We shook hands and hugged.

"Should I kiss you?"

"Maybe not yet. Sa cheeks okay lang."

So that's it. I have a boyfriend now. We are in a secret relationship due to that stupid agreement.

We stayed in Starbucks for a long time.

"Ano terms of endearment natin?"

"Just our names. Baka ma-spill pa eh."

"Sabagay. What about the physical thing?"

"Buddy, we are not doing that yet."

"No, not that. Holding hands, kissing. Maybe in our own privacy we can hold hands. We can kiss but yeah we should be hiding like sa dark."

"It's like we're having an affair." He laughed.

"Wouldn't it be better that way? If everyone knows, God, they are going to expect a lot. They might even convince us to get married next year, who knows."

"I'd like that idea. But maybe we can tell some people who wouldn't know?"

"Let's just keep it between us. Kaya natin di ba?"

"Okay," he said.

We stayed for a couple more minutes, and he dropped me off.

Before I slept, he texted, "Good night, baby."

I'm so fluttered; my heart is full.

Tuesday, July 23

We don’t know how to act now that we are a couple in secret. I told Mansoor to act like nothing changed. We went to lunch together and had Dev Psych.

I stayed at school because my groupmates and I had to discuss our reporting for Friday before our midterms exams. Mansoor and I hung out for a bit, but I needed to finish up the presentation.

I went home and worked on the presentation and the activities we were supposed to do.

Before bed, I called Mansoor, and he read me a poem by an American poet I didn't recognize.

"Am I boring you?" he asked.

"Just continue," I replied.

Wednesday, July 24

I woke up refreshed but had to remind myself to stay focused. We had a quick meeting in the morning with my groupmates and rehearsed what we would do. I had to get them into it by showing leadership.

During his report, Mansoor kept looking my way. I mentally told him to stop, but he did it again. I covered my face.

I attended Fil3 classes, then went to Chemistry. Mansoor passed by the lab since he had English Lit across the hall. He bought me a pizza roll I liked during the break.

After that, I went to work. It was a quiet night, and Lloyd, who was reviewing for exams, covered for me while I checked on customers.

I went home and did my homework essay for tomorrow's Developmental Psych, including finding childhood photos to teenager.

I slept at 1 AM and responded to Mansoor's texts.

Thursday, July 25

We sat down before going to our Bio Psych classes. We wondered if anyone could notice but nobody did. We just talked as usual.

Mansoor mentioned they would have an outing on Sunday and asked if I would come since officers were welcome, but I refused because I'd rather earn money.

"Bakit kailangan mo mag-work pala? You don't seem to need money that much. Your parents pretty much pay for everything."

"I fantasize kasi myself to work in a bookstore while in university."

"So you enjoy it?"

"Oo."

He smiled warmly, despite his cold hands due to the rainy weather.

"Maybe Monday night we can watch Amelie?"

I asked, and he said there was no problem.

We showed each other our childhood albums, but I was shy about mine. Since everyone was doing it, I indulged. Mansoor was a beautiful boy.

I went to work and received a memo that Sunday would be closed for cleaning due to mosquitoes. It was paid, so I was happy.

Lloyd mentioned an older man had been looking for me, possibly the same man who flirted with me a few weeks ago. Lloyd didn't entertain him much, and I told him to keep it that way.

Friday, July 26

We started our reporting, and it went very well; it was interactive. My groupmates did a solid job.

Chemistry was getting tougher, especially handling inorganic substances.

After class, I went to work. My parents were back when I got home.

Saturday, July 27

Mansoor was absent today. Vivian was looking for him and asked me, but I shrugged. He had told me he wouldn't be around due to an org activity at BSU.

Djang showed photos of us together, saying we looked good together. She asked again if we were a couple, and I said maybe next year when the agreement expired.

"Okay lang, we can scrap that. Kinikilig kasi kami sa inyo," she laughed.

"Talaga?" I said, unable to contain my excitement.

"Oh, di kayo nga?"

"No," I shook my head. "Actually, we talked about the possibility."

"So... posible nga?"

"Mmmm..." I shook my head.

She asked if Mansoor was courting me. I said we talked about it but that I wasn't ready, and he agreed.

"Quiet ka lang, susungalin kita pag pinagsabi mo."

"Oo na," she said, flattered. But the girls had already heard.

I didn't see Mansoor all day. At work, the man Lloyd mentioned came by, checked out some books, and tried to get my number. I politely declined.

"Bakit ayaw? May nagbabawal ba?"

"Oo, ako. What kind of logic is that?"

"Oh, so why? Nakikipagkilala lang naman."

"Sir, you never asked for my age."

He fell silent.

"You're employed, so you must be ano, 18, 19?"

"Yes, and you are, 35--?"

"33 naman."

"Pick someone your own age."

His face went sour, and he warned me he'd talk to my boss because they were close. Good thing Lloyd was my witness.

I planned to resign.

We closed up shop, and I went home. I cried to my mom and dad about the guy harassing me. Dad was riled up and wanted to confront him, while Mom insisted I quit the job, concerned for my safety. I regretted telling them as it made them worry more.

I hadn't returned Mansoor's messages. I called him, and we talked until 2 AM. I think I dozed off.

[boringbodywithacrazymind]

09/29/23 Friday

Lord have mercy on this day for real. Since I started working I earned very little money, but I wanted to bring my kids to Starbucks since they've been asking for awhile. In order to get Starbucks it meant that we needed to get up early, and luckily the girls got up early. We got Starbucks and somehow got to school on time.

I arrive at work and I come to find I forgot to grab my lunch bag that has my breast pumps in at home. So I call Ricardo (BD/hubby) right away and NO ANSWER. I call him multiple times and still no answer. I call my mom and ask if she could pick up Richie (our son) and my breast pump and bring to work so I could feed him and then pump later. She waits practically an hour for Ricardo who continues to not answer his phone. During this time, she keeps texting me how she is stressed and worried and to give Ricardo excuses and I am like O.o???????? Ricardo and Richie are sleeping and if can't hear you knock again he/they are sleeping and they are sleeping in the room which is far away from the front door. So.....wym? I'm sorry you waited, but there is no reason to be so "worried" to be freaked out. Then my dad makes contact with me like "is everything ok?" "what's going on" , "how/where are the girls and Richie?".

Mind you I am at work my dad is at work. My mom does not work and right now Hubby is watching over his son. All the time in fact. What can the people who are at work do for you to be comfortable enough to cause drama? What is my dad going to do? Kill the battery on my phone? He's at work. Stop bothering and making my dad worry as if something is wrong. Like dude wtf is wrong with you?

I tell him everything is okay, Ricardo finally calls me back and after going back and forth when they could literally talk to each other and at this point I am so over it. Like I am not going crazy at work cause it's so busy.

Mom finally shows up to my job and I am able to breastfeed and talk to my mom for a little bit; about Manong and his issues at home that Mom does not know about (I was very vague, all I said was that he was mad and needed a sister to talk to since him and Manang Jerily aren't talking): she told me to tell him "just call her" like she is the solver to all the problems. Like no ma'am you're one of our biggest stressors. Anyway.... -_-

I call Ricardo and see that Richie is with him. I thought she would want to keep him for the day, but clearly like I have always said she was not meant to be a mom and is not capable of Caring for my kids. She only does it because she like the attention and validation.

Dad calls me around 4PM after my mom texts me "Nakong, kids want me to ask you if it's ok wd you for them to come wd us tonight sa church (play wd their friends) and sleep wd us. Kung ayaw mong matulog sila dito, just say so ihatid naming dual ng mag 10. Among say mo?".

I replied, "No church tonight mama. Are they home?"

"Wd us yes. Want me to bring them home now kc I'm cooking"

"I can pick them up after I'm done with work"

Dad calls me basically calling me disrespectful because I said their house stinks. I ask him how was I suppose to say anymore nicely their house stinks when I have been saying that for WEEKS. The house is freaking disgusting. It's way too dirty for someone who does not have a job. No wonder why they are sick all the time. Instead of going around taking people who can't do anything for you or be there when you need them; or listening to people who dupe you, OR being told to go somewhere you have no need to go like camping on your grandchild's birthday...............just cause your son called you to go. I am just so frustrated with them it's making me physically sick. I just need help with the girls getting picked up from school. Literally fuck everything else....girls are hungry? Cool there's food at home. They are not starving. They are not pitiful cause they go home hungry.

I am just so over the unnecessary drama. Go away bipolar ass.

[yesttoheaven]

GOOD GIRLS GO TO HELL

CHAPTER 1

pairing: arvin russell x female!reader

summary: In the eyes of extremely strict parents, 'good' girls go to hell, but they don't know that they are handing over their own daughter to the devil – known to all as Rev. Teagardin.

wc: 3.8k

warnings: language, mentions (not depictions) of abuse, manipulation, religious fanaticism, angst

a/n: This idea has been on my mind since the day I watched the movie, so... here we go!

English is not my first language. I am getting help from google translator and he is not always a good ally, so I apologize for any typos or grammar errors.

Y/N – your name

"I don't usually interfere that way. It would be best if she came here willingly. She needs to be open to accept all the blessings that God will bring to her life." Rev. Teagardin took a step forward, considering the request of a mother and father completely desperate for the salvation of their only daughter.

"We tried everything. We found great references about a boarding school called 'Good Pastor', but a week later they called to report that she had run away! Our daughter appeared a few days later in the company of three strange girls. One of them is a single mother, our Y/N shouldn't hang out with those kind of people." The woman's words contained disgust. She was tired of watching her daughter ruin her own life. The girl had become a topic of conversation in the town and a shame for the whole family.

"The truth is, we don't know what to do with Y/N. Day after day she becomes more rebellious. She doesn't respect us." Mr. Henson shared the same agony as his wife, but both see Preston as the solution to this problem.

"We don't want our only daughter to go to hell! You need to help us, Reverend. We believe that you are the only one capable of driving the devil out of her. In the name of God, save our little Y/N!"

In absolute silence, the preacher walked near the window, watching Y/N. She was sitting on the hood of Mr. Henson's car and her body was lulled by the gentle breeze that touched the skirt of the dress she wore, revealing her legs that should have been silky smooth. Smiling, the man looked at the girl's parents, knowing exactly what to do to save Y/N's soul.

"I'm glad you came to me. God will be my guide to help your daughter. Now, I would like to talk to her for a while."

Extremely grateful, Y/N's parents agreed and left the church for a few seconds. When they returned, Y/N was with them. The girl's curious eyes moved from side to side, until they found Preston Teagardin with his hands on his hips. He was at the altar, the cross appearing behind his head left him with a divine aura, but the girl remembers the day she saw the preacher humiliate – indirectly – the chicken liver dish that Emma Russell prepared with such affection. If he said those horrible things to a religious woman like Emma, Y/N didn't want to imagine what he might be thinking about her at the moment. Maybe he was wondering why she hasn't started to burn while walking on sacred ground, but it was him who was burning. Burning with desire. A sin that he identifies in others, but never in himself.

"Hello, you must be Y/N." The man approached, his eyes shining like a hungry predator who had just found the perfect prey. "You don't usually visit the house of God."

"But I'm sure that is about to change." Y/N's mother replied, looking at her daughter hopefully.

Y/N may not be an especially easy girl to handle, but she never understood why her parents didn't respect her space. She never visited the church often and that number dropped to zero when they started to force her to go with them. Over the years, Knockemstiff residents have turned religion into a disease. It's close to insanity and Y/N Henson doesn't want that for her life. Despite being seen as a sinner, she still prays every night. She gets down on her knees and talks to God.

"Dear, your dad and I brought you here to talk to Reverend Teagardin..."

"What? You said you would come here to confess and then we would go home!" Y/N protested angrily. She was ready to retrace her steps to the exit when her father took her arm.

"Y/N, we just want the best for you. Talking to the reverend can be a good start."

"And we are not giving you another option." Mrs. Henson completed, remaining firm in her decision. "Your father and I agreed not to participate in this conversation. We will walk around the town and then we come back here to get you."

"I can take her home... If you agree." Teagardin said, hiding his real intentions and touching the girl's shoulder. She was so small around him and looked so vulnerable. He smiled when he realized that.

"Oh, that's very kind, Reverend. Thanks." Y/N's mother replied, feeling enchanted by the man's benevolence. "Be a good girl." She said, kissing her daughter's forehead.

The preacher accompanied them to the door and having no other option Y/N walked through the church, staring at the cross nailed to the wall. She never felt that she was turning away from God, but looking back is exactly what she did.

"Now it's just me, you and Him." The reverend's words brought Y/N out of her own thoughts and she turned to him, crossing her arms in the process. This made her breasts more visible under the black dress she wore and Teagardin noticed.

"I can go and you tell my parents that you talked to me, but it didn't work because I'm a hopeless case. It's simple."

"I can't lie to your parents. I also don't think you're a hopeless case, Y/N." The man admitted, going to the first bench and sitting down. "We can talk?"

"Like... about my sins?"

"No. A normal conversation. Why don't you start by telling me about your life?" He patted the bench, silently inviting her to sit beside him.

Y/N didn't understand how a simple conversation could help, but she found the idea pleasant. Showing a shy smile, she approached Teagardin and sat down next to him, leaving a space between their bodies. Once again she looked at the cross, beginning to speak:

"I work for Ms. Fowler, she has a chicken coop and some pigs... I don't do much, but I like to help take care of animals and she says they like me too." At that moment Y/N looked at the preacher and imagined that she would find him with an expression of disinterest. The same expression of disinterest that her parents show when she tried to start a conversation or simply tell how her day was. They were always busy, but Teagardin was completely focused on everything she said and with a small smile on the corner of his lips.

"So, do you take care of the animals? I'm impressed, I don't know many girls who risk their lives by entering a pigsty."

"It's a dangerous place." She let slip a sweet laugh, feeling light, as she hadn't felt for a long time. "I understand them."

"I can see that you have a great relationship with animals, but what about your friends? Tell me a little about them." Those words were enough to destabilize Y/N. Any sign of happiness disappeared from her face and everything went gray, just like the view through the church windows. The rain was close and Y/N controlled herself not to start crying.

Like a sniffer dog, Preston felt this was a sensitive subject for the girl – maybe an open wound – and waited patiently until she decided to share it with him.

"I was never good at making friends, but I used to have a friend at school. Her name was Isabella. We were inseparable, but one day her father received a job offer in another city... Despite the distance, she called me every day in the late afternoon" The nostalgia was noticeable in her voice and the way her face softened with small memories. Isabella and Y/N were like sisters, but Mrs. Henson never approved of that friendship. "I am three years without news of my best friend. She never called or answered my letters and I don't know why, reverend."

"Have you never been to visit her?"

"My parents won't let me out of Knockemstiff."

"You don't have to go alone. They can go with you..."

"They don't care about me or what I want." Y/N said, shaking her shoulders as if this feeling was mutual, but deep down she knew it wasn't. "My mom said I have the power to turn people away and if Isabella walked away from me, it is certainly my fault."

"Your mother shouldn't say that." Teagardin looked deeply hurt. The situation was worse than he imagined, this family needs his help.

Y/N needs his help.

"Well, I lost Isabella's friendship, but I got three new friends!" The girl informed, as if she had finally found her place. "Two of them I met at the boarding school. The third helped us to escape and she has a beautiful baby. They work together in a bar away from the city..."

"What do they do in this bar?" The reverend had some suspicions, but he wanted to hear her confess.

"They... dance." Y/N said slowly. "I know it can look wrong, but they are good people and I don't understand why everyone looks at these girls with..."

"Have you ever been there?" Preston needed to know, but the girl just bowed her head. Sighing deeply, he stretched his arm over her shoulders, ending the distance between their bodies. "It's all right... God is merciful and benevolent. He forgives all of our sins, but He does not forgive lies."

"It was only once. I swear!" In the same instant that the words left her lips, she hid her face in Teagardin's chest and he took the opportunity to hug her, and feel the sweet perfume of her hair. It smelled like innocence.

"You made a mistake by going there. That place is not for family girls."

"I was just tired of everything... So, I thought about going there to have a drink and forget about the problems."

"Learn one thing..." The man said softly, running his fingers through her hair. "When problems arise and you feel alone, start praying. God is your best friend. And I am also here to help you."

"Thanks, reverend."

"Never go back to that place again. You shouldn't be drinking... and smoking."

"Wait..." The girl moved away from Teagardin, looking him straight in the eye. "Did my parents say that?"

"I was in town when I saw you smoking with a boy. He approached you and passed the smoke to your mouth... And then he kissed you. Is he your boyfriend?"

"Oh, you saw me with Arvin..." Shame consumed Y/N, turning her cheeks into two tomatoes. "But we are not together. It was our first kiss... My first kiss."

The moment they shared in the car had been magical. Arvin was always different from the Knockemstiff boys. He never judged Y/N for her actions. He understood her, but sometimes some problems were so big that they made the girl run away from him. All Arvin wanted was to hold her in his arms and protect from all the evil in the world.

"You need to stay away from these people. Starting with this young guy." The preacher's words captured Y/N's attention, confusing her. "You can't see it now, but those friendships are not good for you. They are driving you away from your true purpose. And Arvin Russell is taking advantage of your innocence to..."

"Arvin would never do that." She stated in all letters, not letting him finish the assumption. "I think... I think he likes me."

"There is a big difference between love and carnal attraction, and boys his age think of only one thing." Teagardin insisted, using a peaceful tone of voice. He was so convincing, that despite knowing Arvin for a long time, Y/N wondered about the boy's real intentions. He was always kind and respectful, or maybe that's what she thought, but with the help of the reverend she was beginning to understand, and the feeling of being used was difficult to digest. "I saw the way he looked at you... I saw the sin in his eyes."

"This cannot be true... W-We are not talking about the same person! He's d-different!"

"It doesn't matter who you believed in all this time or what you accepted to... to be like them. In the end, you are alone. You know it." When Preston finished, she was completely broken. It was cruel, but someone needed to open her eyes. Y/N deserved the truth. "I know it is difficult, but I am here for you." He buried her against his chest in a bear hug, wishing feel her soft, warm body in his arms again. Y/N returned the hug — and then started to cry.

Her friends were not her friends.

Her parents were right.

She felt confused. Lost. But the reverend was beside her to show a new path free from sin and delusions.

"Do you know Proverbs 28:13?" He asked, holding her face in his hands. With his fingertips he wiped away a few tears and she smiled, shaking her head. "Whoever tries to hide his sins will not succeed, but the one who confesses his sins and leaves them behind will find mercy. Are you ready for this?"

"Yes, reverend." That was the confirmation he needed.

Preston Teagardin always believed that he had a special connection with God. With the right words he had the power to reach the hearts of these girls and offer them redemption. In his dark mind, they were privileged to be touched by a holy man like him. He was doing them a favor. And now it's Y/N's turn.

"First, you need to be free from your sins." The man looked with adoration for the little fallen angel. Slowly, he touched her knees, feeling the smooth skin and after a sigh, the girl was in his hands.

"Reverend..."

"Shhh. Just trust me." He said when his hands disappeared under her dress. His touch was sacred, something she had never experienced, but Y/N's conscience screamed that this was wrong. "Stand up so I can take your panties off. I need to feel you..." She got up, but ran quickly away from him, escaping his dirty hands.

Disappointment appeared in her eyes in the form of tears. It was impossible not to feel used. Again. Influenced by him, Y/N believed that her friends were a problem in her life and that they were moving her away from God's plans, but the real sinner is inside the church. His understanding, concern and kindness never existed. It was all part of the game. He needed to earn her trust before he could attack.

"You... You are a wolf in sheep's clothing! A liar! I thought for the first time someone was understanding my side, but you just want to fuck with me!"

"You got it wrong..."

"S-Stay away from me!" Y/N warned when Teagardin tried to approach. Fear coursed through her veins, spreading through her body like a drug. She didn't know what to do, but she knew she didn't want to be touched by him that way. "If you approach me, I swear I make a scandal! The whole city will know who you really are!"

"No one will believe you." He took a step forward. "You need help. I'm the only one who can..."

"Stop that shit! Do not say that the devil is in me, when you are trying to abuse a girl who is old enough to be your daughter! You are the devil, Teagardin!" For the first time she saw the anger in his eyes. Preston would never agree with that, but that is his true face. He is the devil in disguise and this was confirmed the instant he advanced on her.

Y/N ran to the exit, screaming desperately for help, even though she knew she was alone in this nightmare. With shaking hands, she tried to open the door, but the reverend took her in his arms. Compared to the girl’s small, slender body, he was stronger than she was, but Y/N resisted and hit her knee in the middle of his legs, reaching his weak point. The man let out a loud growl and walked away, seeking support on one of the wooden benches. Taking advantage of the distraction, Y/N opened the door and ran as fast as she could. Teagardin thought of running after her to finish what he started, but he gave up as soon as he saw her cross the threshold of the church, running in the rain as if her life depended on it. She didn't look back, just kept running until she disappeared into the trees.

...

The day turned into night, covering everything with its dark cloak, while rain fell mercilessly on Knockemstiff. Y/N stumbled along the road, hugging her own body in an unsuccessful attempt to warm up. Tears were still streaming down her cheeks, mixing with the raindrops, but the girl's mind was elsewhere.

After what happened at the church, her faith was in pieces. She always knew that bad men walked on Earth, but she never imagined that the preacher was one of them. The way he touched her was disgusting. She wanted to scream, take the pain out of her chest and run back home to tell her parents what happened, but Teagardin's words were stuck in her head, hurting her:

"In the end, you are alone. You know it."

"No one will believe you."

Unexpectedly – or maybe that was a divine sign – a car approached the road Y/N was on. She was surprised to hear the noise of the engine and looked back. Despite the rain and the headlight blinding her for a few moments, Y/N recognized the old car and the boy on the other side certainly recognized her too. Arvin left his truck without a second thought, not caring about the pouring rain wetting his clothes in a matter of seconds.

"What are you doing here?" He asked, needing to raise his voice so she could hear. The girl opened her mouth to reply, but gave up, looking away.

Arvin realized that something was wrong. It was common to see Y/N walking around the city, but not in these circumstances. Before she looked away, he noticed the pain in her eyes. It was no secret to him that she had a difficult relationship with her parents, but this time it was different.

For a moment the worry made him forget that they were both still in the rain and when he realized this, the boy immediately guided her to the car. When she was safely in the passenger seat, he bypassed the vehicle and took the driver's seat. Rain was no longer a problem, but the cold persisted and Arvin grabbed his jeans jacket from the back seat.

"Here." He handed it to her and Y/N mumbled a small 'thanks', wearing the jacket. "So... what happened? You are far from home. It is dangerous to go out in the middle of a storm like this..."

"My intention is to stay away from home. The storm is an extra." The girl tried to relax, hiding her real emotions but it was obvious that she was not well.

"Did you argue with your parents again?"

"I would prefer that." She replied, forcing a laugh. Getting into an argument with her parents was common for her and seemed small compared to what actually happened. But what really happened was suffocating her. "I can tell you everything, r-right?"

"You know you can." Arvin said, holding her hand. The simple contact made their hearts accelerate and Y/N was grateful to have him by her side.

Feeling encouraged, she began to tell what happened at the church. The fact that her parents insisted that the devil was inside her, made Arvin angry. He never understood what the problem was with Mr. and Mrs. Henson about this. Y/N was not sick. All she needed was love and they never gave it to her.

Y/N didn't want to delve into the details of her conversation with the new preacher, but Arvin heard the fear in her voice when she mentioned his name. She said he was good with words, and very persuasive. He easily won her trust and that was her worst mistake. Arvin stopped listening when she said that the man's hands disappeared under the dress she was wearing. Anger consumed him quickly, making his blood boil and he clapped his hands on the steering wheel. With a vision blurred by tears, Y/N looked at him with concern. The tension was clear throughout his body; his jaw was tightly clenched and his hands were shaking as his fingers tightened on the steering wheel. Arvin always had an explosive temper – paternal inheritance –, especially when the people he cared about were hurt.

"The preacher will never touch you again. I promise." He stated with conviction, bringing his attention back to Y/N. She looked tired, crying silently and the boy opened his arms for her to snuggle against his chest. Playing with a lock of her hair, he said: "I always knew there was something wrong with him. I should be there for you..."

"It's okay, Arvin. I'll be fine and I'll forget what happened... I just need to stay away from the church. This is easy for me." Y/N knew it wouldn't be so easy, but to calm him down, everything was welcome.

"You cannot protect him."

"I am not protecting him, but I know you..." She murmured softly, running a hand over his chest. "My life is a mess, you are the only one who believes in me. So, I'm just asking you not to do anything stupid... Because... Because I need you here." Arvin relaxed at her words. It was nice to know that she wanted him around in this difficult time. Y/N would have his support forever. And his love. For her sake, he decided to act with caution, but this does not mean that Teagardin will not suffer the consequences of his actions.

With undisclosed feelings, they remained embraced, just enjoying each other's company. It had been a long day. Arvin remembered the fallen tree in the middle of the road, forcing him to take the long way home, but that path brought him to Y/N. He was happy that it was he who found her in the middle of this storm.

"You need to rest. I will take you home." The boy broke the silence and Y/N moved away from him, shaking her head.

"No! I don't want to go home! My parents... they go..."

"I'll take you to my house." Arvin said, catching her cheek with his hand and watching the panic disappear from her eyes. With a smile, he added: "Grandma misses you."

• a/n: This is the first fic I publish here and I'm very nervous!! (Possibly I will do a second part of this) Btw, criticism is welcome!!

(CHAPTER TWO HERE)

[tinyboxxtink]

"Doppelganger" *Part 24*

Alright I REFUSE to make this story any longer, so the next chapter IS the finale, I swear to you.

This is just one more little loose end I wanted to throw in, maybe it'll come back around the epilogue. Who knows?! I know.

I would have started the "Wedding Day" here but I really wanted it to be it's own chapter, so this is kinda short and I'm not gonna lie if I have to I will make the last chapter 20 pages long to fit the ending in. That being said I have some stuff to do tomorrow night and work the next night so I may or may not split up writing the last chapter between those and post it late Sunday or Monday.

It's worth it I promise! I'll make it worth it.

Part 23

Finale!!

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-------

The next day Rafael asked you to come by his office once again, making you nervous. Especially when you showed up to the Mayor and a Lawyer to greet you along with Rafael.

“Pinguino,” Rafael smiled as he met you at the door with his arms open wide pulling you into a kiss.

“....More interviews?” You whispered as you eyed the two other men.

“Actually, they haven’t told me what they’re doing here yet,” Rafael whispered back as you both walked over to the men sitting at Rafael’s desk. Rafael pulled another chair around to his side so you could sit next to him. He had a feeling this would take a while.

“So...gentlemen,” Rafael cleared his throat. “What’s this about?”

“Well Barba it’s about your wedding,” The mayor replied.

“...Why am I not surprised..?” He shook his head with a laugh.

“Actually Mr. Barba I think you’ll find this visit different from others the mayor here has sprung on you thus far,” His lawyer answered.

“...And that would be because…?” Rafael raised a skeptical eyebrow.

“Because Mr. Fenkell here says that I owe you financial compensation for all you’ve been doing for me,” The mayor replied rather gruffly as he crossed his arms like a petulant child being called into the principal’s office.

“...Excuse me?” Rafael looked at both of them with confusion.

“Well Mr. Barba, I’m surprised you haven’t either realized or brought up the fact that the situation that you’re in is called ‘quid pro quo’,” The lawyer explained.

“Yes I know what ‘quid pro quo’ is counselor, we went to the same law school,” Rafael snarked. “And I graduated with higher honors than you,”

“Barba I’m here trying to help you out, I don’t know why you’re lashing out at me,” The lawyer now crossed his arms.

“Baby,” You put a hand on his. “Just let the man talk,”

“Right,” He nodded reluctantly. “Go on,”

“Like I was saying,” Mr. Fenkell pulled out papers from his briefcase. “I assume you and your fiancée here have been going along with the Mayor’s requests for fear of losing your job, correct?”

“I mean, not mine per say,” Rafael shrugged. “THAT would be illegal,”

“Right,” Mr. Fenkell nodded. “But everything he’s done thus far involving you and your fiancé's likeness entitles you to royalties, and dues for services,”

“Well, that is true,” Rafael nodded. “I’ve been so preoccupied with everything else I haven’t even stopped to think--”

“Which is exactly why I’m here,” Mr. Fenkell cut him off. “I figured a competent lawyer like yourself would realize when all the dust settles, that you were indeed entitled to a sum of money, and would therefore sue the Mayor after the fact,”

“Wow, that’s a lot of assuming on your part sir,” You laughed softly. “You really think Rafael is that shit of a--”

“I mean he is right,” Rafael finished for you.

“...Or I’m just an idiot,” You muttered.

“No, baby you’re not an idiot,” Rafael took your hand. “But we are entitled--YOU are entitled for some kind of compensation for all that you’ve done for the mayor--for me,”

“I thought my compensation was getting to marry you,” You smiled sweetly.

“Aww,” Mr. Fenkell remarked, causing an eye roll from the mayor.

“Right so--” Mr. Fenkell began laying papers filled with legal jargon on the desk in front of you and Rafael.

“This contract states that once we settle on a number, you won’t try and collect more from the mayor with some random claim like ‘emotional distress’ during your wedding, or events thereafter due to all of this,”

“...Trauma?” You couldn’t help but laugh. “You think that after everything I went through, I would classify this as trauma?”

“I mean theoretically you could, Ms. Y/L/N,” He nodded. “The emotional stress of reliving your trauma and trying to plan a wedding while on display for the whole city must be taking a toll on you right now, is it not?”

“...Well it wasn’t until you said it like that,” You muttered.

“Dammit Maxwell I told you, they were perfectly fine with--” The mayor began to pitch a fit.

“Oh no no no,” Rafael wagged a finger at the mayor. “Just because she’s ignorant of the--”

“Excuse you?” You crossed your arms at Rafael’s condescending tone.

“I mean, just because she doesn’t realize or recognize the emotional stress she’s under doesn’t mean that she doesn’t have it, and doesn’t deserve compensation” He looked to you apologetically while he re-worded the statement. You gave him an approving nod.

“Right well this is what this is for--”

“And what kind of price tag have you put on my fiance's feelings, counselor?”

“Well if you’ll peruse the contract, counselor…” Mr. Fenkell pointed to the bottom of the paper.

“This contract blah blah blah, no further seeking monetary blah blah blah…” Rafael spoke out loud as he scanned the document. Then suddenly, his eyes widened and he stopped reading, looking at you then Mr. Fenkell then the Mayor.

“...A million dollars?” He raised his eyebrow, skeptical.

“...What?” You gasped.

“....Each,” He added with a smile as he handed you the paper. You didn’t know a lot of the words, but in plain black and white you read: “...In the form of one million dollars per plaintiff,”

“I’m sorry, WHAT?” You said louder than you intended, but that was insane.

“That’s insane,” You said out loud. “I don’t need that kind--”

“Baby,” Rafael stopped you and pulled you slightly away from the mayor and his lawyer. “I know that you get antsy when good things happen to you, but you deserve this,”

“For what?!” You hissed. “For taking a few photos? For letting a camera crew in a church? Rafael I just--”

“...But think of everything before that, carino,”

“What, Nevada? That--” You shook your head.

“Wasn’t your fault,” Rafael finished.

“...Well it wasn’t the mayor’s fault either, Raffi,” You nodded at the mayor.

“But he is exploiting you for it,” Rafael pointed out.

“....True,” You nodded.

“Excuse you two, but I--” The mayor began to rant again.

“And if I may add,” Mr. Fenkell jumped in. “While Mr. Barba was worried about his job, you also had reason to be worried about it as well. Being as he is your only means of support,”

“Right now,” You quickly added.

“....Right,” Mr. Fenkell gave you a side eye. “Currently,”

Clearly this douchebag thought what everyone else must be thinking. That you were just marrying Rafael for his money. So that you could be a ‘kept’ woman. Well, he was about to learn that was the furthest thing from the truth.

“Alright then,” You finally said. “Then I want my share to go to Rafael, if we’re going to be married it’s his anyway,”

“No no no no, Nuh-uh,” Rafael shook his head. “Your share is your share,”

“...But I don’t want you to think that I’ve got some... ‘escape money’,” You gave him a sad look.

“Escape money?” He laughed. “Baby I told you, I think the last thing I should be worried about is you leaving me,”

“....Also true,” You nodded with a soft smile. You sure as hell had not gotten this far working this hard to ‘get’ Rafael to just give him up. Ever.

“Okay then, do I tell you where I want the money to go or do I do it myself?” You asked Mr. Fenkell.

“...You already have plans for it?” Mr. Fenkell asked you. “...Didn’t you just say you didn’t want it? Why would you--”

“Just answer the question,” You said flatly.

“I mean Mr. Barba could just draw up the contracts and paperwork for you to transfer your funds wherever you--”

“But Mr. Barba is my husband, not my lawyer,” You cut him off. “...And I’d like to keep that way,” You looked over at who Rafael looked at you in confusion.

"Not Mixing business and pleasure," You smirked.

“Right,” Mr. Fenkell nodded as pulled out a legal pad and a pen. “Well I can make a list of where you want to divert the funds and we’ll go from there,”

“Okay,” You took a deep breath. “Well, first of all-- obviously,” You took Rafael’s hand. “I want to pay off the rest of my time at Julliard,”

“That’s unnecessary, carino--”

“Yeah I know you say that Rafael, but I was going there before I met you and it’s not your respon--”

“It’s already paid for, in full,” He spoke over you.

“...What?” You asked him with a breathy voice. When did he have time to do that?! WHY-wait.

“But I’m going to need an extra semester since I’m taking the rest of this one off,” You said softly as you glanced at the other two in shame. You still felt guilty about Rafael having to basically babysit you for the past few weeks.

“Yeah I figured that.” He nodded with a smile, stroking your cheek. “It’s all taken care of, carino,”

“...Alright fine then I want to pay it back,” You insisted.

“No,” He shook his head. “Absolutely not,”

“Rafael come on--”

“NO,” He repeated sternly. “I won’t take it,”

“....Alright, fine,” You rolled your eyes. “Then I want a chunk to go to abuela--”

“No I have them covered too,” He shook his head. “And they are definitely NOT your responsibility. And before you say next that you want it to go to Maria, she will never accept it. We're too proud of a people," He smiled teasingly.

“...Fine,” You sighed in frustration. “THEN I want a chunk of it to go to opening a drama center,” You crossed your arms and looked at Rafael. “Any objections to that, counselor?”

“...A drama center?” He looked at you curiously.

“Look,” You took both of his hands. “I know you couldn’t-- your mom didn’t want you---” You took another breath, trying to figure out exactly what to say. “...You had to give up your dream to take care of your family,”

“Carino…” He took your hand.

“And my parents, they spent all the money we had on dance lessons, acting lessons, all of it. On ME. Just so that I could live my dream,” You continued. “Kids should be able to dream their dreams without their parents having to worry about money to do so,”

“But...your dream, Y/N. You want to be on Broadway. How are you gonna fit--” He started to speak but you were nowhere near done with your speech.

“Baby my dream was selfish,” You shook your head. “I wanted to be famous for the wrong reasons. To be adored by the world, to be loved by everyone. But, now I know the only person’s love I care about, is yours,” You stroked his face.

“If I open this place then I can still use my talents as a teacher, helping kids like us. I told your mom that when I met you, you made me a better person, that you made me want to be better. I want that to be true. I need that to be true,” You finally finished with a small smile, tears lined Rafael’s eyes.

“You are the best person I know, mi amor,” He pushed a strand of hair behind your ear. “I think the center is a great idea,”

“Good,” You smiled. “And….I want to name it the Y/L/N-Barba Drama Center,”

“....Well obviously after you,” He nodded.

“No,” You shook your head. “After you. And my parents. Because if it wasn’t for them I wouldn’t have found you, and you gave me everything I’ve ever wanted,”

“I love you,” He beamed at you as he kissed you deeply.

“...And on that note,” You turned back to Mr. Fenkell who looked wildly uncomfortable by your little cutesy side conversation.

“I want the rest to be split between a savings account for me, and the other half into a trust,”

“A trust?” Mr. Fenkell asked as he wrote down your wishes.

“A trust for our children,” You smiled at Rafael. “My parents spent so much money so that I could live my dream. I think it’s only fair I do the same for them; especially when I have the means to do it,”

“See those redneck shithead Jersians have no idea what they’re talking about,” He pressed his forehead against yours. “You are not selfish, not at all,”

“Thanks to you,” You pressed your own forehead against his like a love head butt.

“....Okay, so is there anywhere else you’d like it to go, Ms. Y/N?” Mr. Fenkell said rather loudly, trying once again to remind you there were other people in the room. People who were not amused with your disgustingly cute conversations.

“Um, no I think that’s good,” You nodded.

“Split up mine the same way, Max,” Rafael added.

“Rafael you don’t need to--” You started to protest but he put a finger to your mouth.

“I have money,” He assured you. “I have enough money to take care of us for the rest of our lives. This money should go somewhere that represents the both of us, and our love,”

“Can we please for the love of God just end this, please?” The mayor groaned. “If I have to sit here and watch you word vomit your love all over this office, I might actually vomit,”

“Right,” Rafael rolled his eyes. “Well gentlemen you know where to find us,” He grabbed the pen and signed one of the contracts then handed it to you and you did the same.

“Now if you’ll excuse us we’re going to ‘love vomit’ all over each other now,” He smirked as he handed back the papers. Mr. Fenkell and The mayor nodded as they walked out.

“Well, what do you want to do now?” Rafael wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

“As tempting as that sounds, I have another request mi amor,” You played with the hair on the back of his knuckles with a soft voice.

“Anything for you pinguino,”

“Well I mean, you have some pull over there,” You nodded outside towards the courthouse that was attached to the DA's office by a hallway.

“...Why, do you need parking tickets dismissed or something? Did I agree to marry a felon?” He teased you.

“No,” You giggled. “But I would like to skip the ‘name changing’ line,” You pulled him closer as his smile grew bigger.

“I don’t think that’s what they call it, but I appreciate the sentiment,” He kissed you as you both walked towards the door of his office and out into the lobby.

“We’ll be back, Tommy,” He told his assistant.

“Right sir,” He nodded.

“This way to the ‘name changing line’, pinguino,” He smirked as you walked down the hall towards the courthouse.

------

--An Hour Later--

You and Rafael walked out of the courthouse and down the steps hand in hand as you pulled the two papers from his hands. One was a marriage license, and one was a form that was filled with boring legal jargon but at the bottom was printed: “Legal Name: Mrs. Y/F/N Barba,” with your new signature on the dotted line.

“Mrs. Rafael Barba,” You smiled as you looked at the paper.

“Oh no no no,” Rafael shook his head with a laugh. “That sounds like you’re my property, pinguino,”

“True,” You nodded with a teasing smile.

“...So why the sudden urgency to change your name, carino?” He asked as you walked down the street hand in hand. “Not that I’m complaining. I'd be lying if I said just looking at your name with my last name makes me giddy,”

“Giddy?” You gave him a look.

“Yeah, I said it. Giddy,” He laughed.

“...I don’t know, it was something that my therapist said,” You shrugged.

“...And what did she say?” He asked you skeptically.

“She said,” You sighed and pulled Rafael out of the flow of traffic of people.

“She said that women who don’t take their husband's last names had one foot out the door of the marriage before even going in,” You looked up at him with soft eyes. “And I don’t want you to think that I am any less than 100% sure of my love for you, and the rest of our lives together,”

“Well, first of all I’d like to see her marriage to divorce ratios based on that assumption,” He rolled his eyes. “And second-- I appreciate the sentiment baby, I really do. Just as long as you did it for you, and not because your therapist guilted you into it,”

“She didn’t,” You assured him. “I did this for me. For us,”

“Well then Mrs. Barba,” He took your hand once again with a huge smile. “Let’s grab some dinner, shall we?” He asked in a melodramatic, fancy tone.

“We shall, Mr. Barba,” You answered in the same tone, making both of you giggle like school kids.

Now all that was left to do was actually get married!

[xxisxxisxxis]

Shining Star | Part Two

[Axl Rose x OC]

Words: 3.1k

Warning(s): Explicit language, mentions of suicide

Tag list: @teller258316 @reigns420 @xpoisonousrosesx @oskea93 @blowinmeupwithherlove @redlipscrystalskies14 @sparxx27 @kaitieskidmore1 @sublimeprincesswasteland

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"Pretty as a picture." I say to myself, swiping lipstick across my lips in the bathroom mirror before I click the tube shut and make sure my hair looks good. 

My stomach churns at the thought of seeing Tommy...and Vince. 

I haven't spoken a word to Vince since he got Tami pregnant a year and a half ago, and I haven't spoken to Tommy since he leapt out of my bedroom window after 3 minutes of awkward sex. 

"Do you fuck all of your friends?" My mother's words come back to bite me in the ass as I groan out in frustration. 

The only plus to any of this is that I'll get to hang out with Viv. 

There. Viv. Just focus on Vivian. 

I leave the bathroom and glance around to see if I see any familiar faces. 

Nope. 

I pull the skirt of my dress down a little and rub my lips together, people passing left and right, looking either too drunk to be bothered or too busy. 

"Tansy?" I hear a confused voice and look straight ahead, seeing Vivian by the payphone. 

"Hey!" I reply excitedly, rushing to her as fast as I can, being careful not to trip over my feet adorned in red heels. 

Vivian Sixx—Kinston at that point—had a ballet scholarship to Juilliard, never missed a Sunday church service, and was one of those annoyingly gorgeous girls that genuinely thought they were ugly. She couldn't stand her red hair because she was teased in middle school and called "firecrotch," she hated her freckles and her height because she'd been compared to a giraffe--"tall as shit with brown spots"--and the fact her mom was a batshit crazy Jesus lunatic never helped matters…but that stuff was all in her head because after middle school, guys looked at her differently, Jesus-lover and all. She saw annoying traits, but most people saw legs a mile long, a unique hair color that stood out in the sea of bleach blonde, freckles that framed emerald green eyes, and a heart as kind and beautiful inside as she was on the outside. 

She's always said I was the most gorgeous woman she'd ever met, but she is, to me, the most stunning. 

She didn't have to try to get anybody's attention, she walked in a room and she had it--so much so that Matt Sorum called her "Fire Woman" after The Cult song because he claimed that's the first thing that came to mind when he first saw her walking back stage at his first gig with Guns N' Roses. "She could give me the fucking clap and I'd kiss her feet for it." He told me, his facial expression mimicking someone who'd been struck by lightening twice…

People always looked at her like that but she rarely noticed because she'd be too busy looking up at Nikki with utter hearts in her eyes, but we'll get into that later.

"What are you doing here?" She asks me curiously. 

"Vince called me and wanted me to come." I explain and she raises her brows. 

"Vince?" She asks and I nod. "The same Vince that cheated on you multiple times Freshman year? And your entire relationship?"

"It's been, what, four years?" I ask, in reference to how long it's been since he and I started dating. "Maybe he's grown up a little." I suggest and she just clears her throat, cueing the hollering of an angry girl.

"Fuck you! Piece of shit! Motherfucker!" She shouts, the sound of her hitting Vince gets louder and she stomps down the hall as he follows after her, continuously trying to get her attention by saying "babe" repeatedly. 

"My pants! Babe!" He's fully in sight now as she stomps off...and he's fully naked.

"Fuck you!" She calls back to him, leaving him behind. 

"I fucking love those pants." He whines, disappointed, cupping his dick. 

"Your swimsuit parts are out." Vivian tells him, and he and I make contact over her shoulder, my nerves tensing up anxiously as he looks at me with a grin. 

"Hey, Tans." He says to me, about to come closer but Vivian stops him. 

"Go put some clothes on." She orders to him and he rolls his eyes, turning and walking away, his butt shining as he leaves. "You had sex with that." She reminds me and I frown slightly. 

"Yeah, he hasn't changed a bit has he?" I ask her and she shakes her head a little. 

"He's gotten worse." She states. "Alright, c'mon, let's go see Tommy." She takes my hand and leads me to where he is, my heart nearly beating out of my chest. 

How awkward is this going to be? 

We turn the corner and see him and two other guys standing in their street clothes, and when Tommy sees me, all my nerves dissipate because he completely makes me forget our awkward sex never even happened. 

"Tansy fucking Reilen!" He exclaims excitedly as I walk to him to hug him. 

He leans down to reach my 5'3" height and wraps his arms tightly around me. 

"Hey, Tommy!" I reply, just as happy. 

This is the first time he, Vivian, and I, will be hanging out together...Viv's been having to hangout with us separately because we've been avoiding each other for the most part. I guess we don't have to, anymore. 

He releases me, immediately turning to the ball of teased, jet black hair. 

"This is Nikki," he informs me, "the band's bassist." 

Hazel eyes--nearly green--look down at me behind his hair, traveling down my face, to my chest, down my legs, and back up again, the tiniest, mischievous smirk on his lips, and I raise my brow a tiny bit…

Trouble. Trouble. Trouble. Trouble. Is exactly what Nikki was, and it was all he and I could get ourselves into for years to follow.

"And this is Tansy." Tommy tells Nikki, oblivious to how he's looking at me.

"Nice to meet you." I tell Nikki. 

"Yeah." He replies. 

"And Mick, our guitarist." Tommy says next, nodding to the shorter man who's also got jet black hair. 

"Hi." I say to him. 

He just gives a small smile and mumbles, "hey."

"He's a little quiet but when you get to know him he opens up." Tommy says to me, quietly as Vince reappears with clothes on. "We were about to head to the rainbow," he starts next, his eyes flickering to Viv. "If someone's willing to stay out late." 

"Fine." Vivian doesn't argue, sighing out. 

"Hallelujah. Thank fuckin' God." Vince pipes, sliding his arm around my shoulder, making me roll my eyes. 

The entire time to the Rainbow, Vivian and Nikki are constantly back and forth, tearing each other new assholes and going for each other's throats. I don't know what beef they have with each other but it's brutal and borderline sex fueled. 

Once we get to the bar and grill, I drag Viv to the bathroom with me so I can touch up my makeup. 

"So…" I start, looking in the mirror, "...have you lost your virginity yet?" 

"No." She says it as if she's slightly offended. 

"Oh." 

"Why?" 

"It's just…" I start but quickly decide that it'll just piss her off, probably. "Nothing." 

"Tansy." She sighs, irritated. "What is it?" 

"Nothing. I just thought you and that Nikki guy have messed around." I shrug and she looks like she's seen a ghost. 

"I—ew why would you think that? We haven't." She insists and I hold my hands up in surrender. 

"I'm sorry, I just thought you had." I tell her. 

"What makes you think we have?" 

"There's a tension." The words are framed by a smirk and she widens her eyes. 

"There is not a tension. There is so not a tension." She gets it out without laughing although I can tell she wants to. “We argue. All the time. He thinks I’m a self-righteous prude and I think he’s the spawn of Satan. If there’s a tension, it’s because we hate each other.”

"You don't have to like someone to have sex with them." I inform her, speaking from experience of the guys who've had sex with me without giving a damn, and me having sex with guys I didn't necessarily like just to make them happy. "I really like him for you, though. You get all riled up and firey when he's around." 

"Oh, please." She rolls her eyes. 

“I just met the guy and I can tell he has you acting different. You used to be so quiet and shy around people you don’t really know, now you’re jumping in to conversations just to piss him off and prove him wrong.”

“Because I don’t like him.” She shakes her head. “And he doesn’t like me. That’s where the tension comes from. See? It’s full-circle.”

"Hate-sex is always an option." I suggest. 

"Do not even start." She scolds me, pointing her finger. 

"What? It gets rid of all the aggression and ill feelings." I explain. 

“So does their shows. Did you know they encourage people to get their feelings out during a show so they go home chilled out and not so uptight?” she tells me and I look at her, not even the slightest bit convinced. “And it works.”

“Yeah, until he gets off stage and then you get all hot and bothered.” I reply with a grin. 

“I get hot because he’s Devil-Spawn and the heat from hell radiates off of him and I get bothered because he’s an arrogant idiot.”

“Or you like him and don’t know why you do so you displace your frustration and confusion on to him.” I shoot back. “I was honestly joking about the hate sex okay? I don’t want you to go jump in to bed with him if you don’t want to but you two were fighting like cats and dogs the whole time we were on our way here. I think you should try to let whatever kind of bravery he evokes in you come out in a way that’s not in the form of riled up anger or fiery hatred.” I recommend and she nods a little. “Now, c’mon because I have a slutty blonde waiting.”

That was the night Mötley Crüe was signed to Elektra records by rock-god signing Tom Zutat, who's responsible for record companies grasping ahold of a plethora of leather-patented hair metal douchebags that could make good music and snort their way through long enough power rails of coke that once they reach the end of white powder without flinching, China's on the other side. But you want to know a secret? It was all bullshit. Every person I've met in that rock scene, you know, the ones that despised the term "hair metal" yet teased their hair two feet above their heads and played heavy metal? Yeah, them. Every single one of them had this "I was made for this shit" attitude. 

Some of them nearly put bullets through their head, OD'd, hung themselves, turned their cars on and locked themselves in their garage...even the ones that hadn't purposely tried to take themselves out either almost pushed it too far and died accidentally from too much booze or drugs or vehicle accidents, or did push it too far. 

They weren't made for it. 

Nobody's fucking made for millions of people wanting a piece of them every single night, management running them to their grave for more money, dealers keeping them numb, all their relationships just exploding in their faces, all of their "friends" wanting more and more and more. 

They thought they were made for it because when someone gets a taste of what they decide the universe or God or whoever or whatever destined for them to become, they take it and run with it without reading the fine print. 

They see the fame without the lack of privacy and hangers-on. 

They see the fans without the people who hate their guts and make it known. 

They see the money without the gold diggers. 

They see the excess without the high risk that comes with taking advantage of having everything with the snap of their fingers. 

They see the glutton without the punishment. 

Until they're standing on the railing of the balcony of their Hollywood penthouse, their best friend trying to talk them down while the police are on their way. 

And then of course when they do turn up dead by suicide, people talk their typical, "how awful, they killed themselves in their mansion, surrounded by their expensive furniture, wearing their expensive clothes, with millions—possibly billions—in their bank account, how sad for them, boohoo." 

As someone who's been dirt broke, to the point of getting my water cut off and having to shower at a friend's house, but then growing up to have more money than I knew what to do with aside from blow it on drugs? Money doesn't buy happiness, jerkoffs. It can buy distractions to buffer pain and suffering, sure, but once the high wears off, or that new car loses its luster, or that new house starts to feel fucking empty, all while that wall full of awards and plaques and magazine posters cementing your fame and worth and stake in the industry you sold your soul for just reminds you that you don't even recognize who the hell you are anymore and nothing can change that...you get fucking depressed. Hate to say it. Hate to be the bearer of bad news, that even though you're poor as shit and are depressed as shit that even if you had money and fame you'd still be fucking sad. But I'd rather tell you the truth than sell you the fallacy that me and everybody else I was friends with bought, that landed every single one of us in situations where we felt we had no other way except to just off ourselves all while remembering when we were stupid enough to proudly say: "I was made for this." 

People are made for this like Matthew Trippe replaced Nikki Sixx, which—if you want the truth—is complete bullshit.

“He said we could possibly score a five album deal, Viv, why aren’t you happy about this? I thought you wanted us to get signed?” Tommy asks Vivian as she slings her keys across the guys' shitty living room, pissed beyond measure.

“You just told me you were dropping out of school, Tommy! We are so close to graduating, can’t you just wait?!” 

“No, I can’t! I can’t just wait because what I wanted is happening and I need to focus on the band right now more than ever!” He argues while motioning to Nikki and Vince, who, like me, are being smart and staying near the door incase we need to get out of sight once Vivian and Tommy kill each other.

“Your education should be your main focus, at least until you graduate! You are so close to being done, Tommy, why can’t you just—“

“Because I don’t give a fuck about school, Vivian! What I am passionate about doesn’t require a diploma, and I’m sorry if me dropping out makes you feel like I’m leaving you behind or whatever the fuck you feel, but I’m not sorry for wanting to focus on my main priority!”

“What I’m hearing is that I wasted hours of my time throughout school trying to tutor you and help you all for you to throw it away on the idea of being some hot-shot rockstar with girls and drugs and booze—”

“Oh, my God, you act like you would have had better things to do with that wasted time!” He sounds like he already knows he's gonna lose the argument while Vivian just rolls her jaw. “And it’s not a fucking idea, it’s fucking reality and you’re only mad because you have no control over it!”

“I’m mad because we talked about this and everything we agreed on, everything we promised each other, is absolute void to you now that it’s actually happening!” 

“Shit changes, Viv, people change! What I considered important junior year is completely different than what I consider important now.” He calms down, sighing. 

“We agreed we would both graduate high school and I could either put off college or drop out if I needed to...” she trails off, her voice shaking slightly with oncoming tears, making me feel bad for her. “That was our plan to avoid this from happening. To avoid you leaving me behind.” Now it's crystal clear why she's freaking out over them being offered a record deal. “You considered me important junior year when you came up with that plan. When you promised me you wouldn’t go on to bigger things without me and forget me. And now...” She takes a step back, while Tommy attempts to walk to her. 

“Viv, I didn’t mean it like that.” He tries to tell her. 

“No, you’re right.” she replies, her body shaking a little. “Shit changes.” I raise my brow because I've never heard her curse before. “People change.” She keeps on. “Glad this is happening now, though, so I don’t waste any more time on a completely different page than you, Tommy.” Her voice cracks a little and she grabs her keys quickly.

“Viv—“ Tommy tries to grab her arm as she heads to the door but she snatches away from him. “Fuck you.” she cracks, her voice barely coming out as tears spill over her  lashes. 

Nikki and Vince step aside to let her leave all while I contemplate following her, but if I know Vivian, I know she likes to think about things when she's upset, rather than just talk them out with someone. Which is the only time she likes to be alone. 

She just slams the door on us, and Tommy. 

Most definitely wouldn't be the last time she did that.

"Tommy, are you—"

"—I'm goin' home." He grumbles, grabbing his keys, and me and Nikki and Vince all look at each other. 

"Tommy, you are home?" Nikki reminds him. 

"I'm stayin' with my folks so I can vent to my sister because she's the only one who knows Viv good enough to know she's being fuckin' unreasonable." He states. 

"I barely know her and I can tell you she's unreasonable." Nikki scoffs, earning a glare. "Sorry, man." He mumbles in return. 

"Bye." Tommy says, closing the door behind him. 

"Well...I'm gonna go find a chick to fuck." Vince says, stretching.

"You got one right here." Nikki chuckles looking at me and I raise my brows. 

"Not since I knocked Tami up." Vince reads my mind and I nod. 

"Exactly." I reply. 

"Who?" Nikki asks. 

"Nobody. Don't wait up." He tells us, opening the door and leaving, too, more than likely heading to the strip club down the street. 

"So, like, how old are you?" Nikki asks. 

"Why?" 

He just gets a shit eating grin on his lips. 

[blackrosesfanfic]

Chapter 240

Chris

"Christopher, this is fucking real." Amber snaps.

I sit up in bed. "Bae."

She stands in front of the mirror. "This is going to be fucking... There's so much shit. I will be having a baby next year. What are we doing? Tell people? Not?"

"Girl, go to damn sleep."

"I can't." She blows. "Do you want to go with me to tell my parents? I mean like you going with me. So when we going?"

I sigh. "Arrange it and let me know. I don't fucking care. Go to sleep."

She walks towards the bedroom door. "It's fucking late. Get out the bed, FatHead."

"Walk faster." I groan.

"Aye, Chris." Trey says walking in the room.

I sigh. "Yeah."

"Cammie's mom made gumbo."

"For breakfast?"

"Bitch it's fucking 11."

I look at the clock. "I thought you were leaving."

"We all leaving tomorrow. You got the place till tomorrow. Plus Cammie's stepfather is here and Cammie acting like a human. I mean... me and Caden just woke up but anyway. She doing better."

"I thought it was you that needed fixing."

He shrugs. "My shit good."

"Where my baby?" I say looking around.

"Probably eating." Trey shrugs.

I sit up. "Is it wrong for wanting Amber pregnant and giving her a hard time about not wanting it?"

"What woman you know happy to be pregnant once she pregnant? You see Leah. You knew Cammie and MiMi. She pregnant. You take the happy days and you fucking go with it any other day."

"She not that far along."

"She pregnant. Who cares? They feel that shit."

I start to get out of bed then grab my balls when I feel a shit load of air. I chuckle at the face Trey makes. Before he could say anything Lane runs into the room.

"Chris you butt out!" Lane yells.

"Lane?" Cammie snaps.

Lane grabs Trey's legs. "Daddy, get me. Daddy?"

Trey picks him up as he scrambles from what might have been Cammie coming. Trey turns around walking out. I get up and walk to the bathroom. I'm not fucking getting rid of my baby. Amber can shut the fuck up and deal with life. She knew we were once trying. Nobody has been doing shit not to get pregnant.

"Mama Cammie can cook her ass off. Taste this."

"No." I snap.

She makes a lot of noise. I look behind me at her.

"Why are you being mean?"

"I feel like you putting all this stress on me about this baby when you and I both know you keeping it. Why argue?"

"Are you high? What are you talking about?" She snaps walking out. "What's happening? Chris acting mean to me because I'm not trying to kiss his ass today. Chris! You have a plane in the morning! I told him."

I'm fucking pissed off at the way she is acting right now. Like who the fuck is this when you been acting so shitty yesterday? I feel like she is acting fake as shit. But I don't know which Amber is fake. Is it this nice as person that seems to be okay with being pregnant or is that hateful bitch from last night fake? I walk into Cammie and Trey's room. Nobody was in there. I sigh.

"Nooo." Lane cries.

"Yo, what are you doing?" Trey asks walking past me into the room.

I realize that I was just standing there. "Ain't no way they can flip like that."

"Man, you don't know shit about little people then. But we woke up like this."

"Huh?" I retort. "Pregnant women."

He laughs. "Oh, yeah. I told you."

"I need to work on my attitude." I shake my head.

"Go talk to Rollie. I'm still working on my fucking attitude." He snatches Lane up from the bed. Lane starts crying. "Boy, what are you doing? Let's take a nap. Wait til your mama gets back."

Lane cries. "No tell Mommy."

Trey lies down on the bed with Lane. "Now is a good time to talk Chris. Go."

"Huh?"

"Talk to Amber while she feeling good, nigga. Do everything while she feeling good."

"Oh." I say turning to walk out. "You seen my daughter?"

"Getting spoiled by Cammie's mom. Cammie's nice twin."

Amber wasn't anywhere in the kitchen or front part of the house. I won't hunt her down to disturb her from her bouncy attitude. I'll wait til after I eat. I sit down at the table with Marco. He looks at me.

"Chris Brown right?"

"Nigga." I snap.

He chuckles then shows me his phone. There's a half naked woman on Facetime. I lean forward looking at the screen. I guess the nigga was showing me to someone not showing me his phone. She smiles faintly. I narrow my eyes at Marco. I guess all men are fucking dogs.

"You bold." I say looking down at my phone.

"She ain't shit to me." Macro's ass says out loud. Damn.

The girl says nothing. What the fuck? I didn’t think that was Marco. I just saw him as. Well shit. The motherfucker is never around. His baby mama is never with him or his kid. Hell they been together for a long as time and not married. It all makes sense. He hangs up the phone randomly. Like he had said bye.

"Marco you work?"

"Military."

"Who was that?" I nod towards the phone.

He kinda shakes his head. "I used to be in the military. I work at a gun manufactory company, which I got through my military clearance."

Hilda walks into the dining room. Oh shit. "Why you never do what I tell you?"

"What didn't I do?"

"Where is your son?"

Marco picks his phone up then puts it in his pocket. This man is clearly not paying attention to shit Hilda is saying. She slaps his dreads then she sucks her teeth walking out of the room. What kinda relationship is this? Marco chuckles to himself then he stands up.

"Thought you were different." I say to him.

"From who?" He shrugs.

I shrug back. "Don't know any faithful people nigga."

"I'm faithful." He nods. "Devin faithful."

"Devin not."

Marco makes a face. "This last time they been together. That’s been like 3 years. He a pretty good motherfucker."

"How you fucking faithful my nigga? I saw that fucking girl. I know you fucking loud ass girl. She ain't gonna go for you talking to some bitch on the phone."

"You right." Marco nods. "Aye, Baby!"

The sliding door opens. "Marco, go get your fucking son. Why are you calling me?"

"Tasha calling me again. I answered."

"I can't stand your childish ass shit." She says closing the door.

Marco laughs and walks out the door. "I tried."

"I thought I was fucked up." I say to myself.

I could hear him laughing still. I got a feeling he didn't say shit about that girl on his phone. I don't think I'm close enough to Hilda to start some shit about a girl on her man's phone. Let me mind my business. Weird ass guy.

Rollie

"Daddy, I... Daddy, you listening?" Jordan asks.

"Yes, Baby." I reply.

She hugs my neck. "I love you."

"I love you too." I say eating my food.

"Grandpa?" Jordan says funny. "Daddy, me and Grandpa going to look for seashells down by the big rocks. Oh Daddy, I have to tell you about my new grades. 3 A's and a B cause I didn't know we had a test and I missed school. I mean I didn't do the make up work. That's why. Is the B okay?"

I kiss her arm thats around my neck. "It's not okay that you didn't turn in work. So you didn't do everything you could but I like B's. I think you can try harder next time."

"Yes, sir, I can. Cause Mommy say I can't miss school if I can't make up my work. I want to go to California with you whenever I can. Or wherever you go."

"Can I eat?"

She let's go of my neck. "I'm going to ask Lexi if I can braid her hair like mine."

"Okay." I say relieved.

"God always has a way." Lonnie says.

I look at him. "What you talking bout, Preacher?"

He smiles at me then eats his food. After a few seconds he nods. "I think we can be friends on different terms now. You see how you can love a child that isn't yours. God teaches lessons all the time."

"Yeah."

"You still pray?"

I stare at him for a minute. He just casually talking and eating. Not caring if he talking to himself. Aight Lonnie. I do see how you can love a child that isn't yours. I don't need him and I never needed him to become the man I am today. But it was never any disrespect between us. I just simply needed him to know I didn't need a daddy. I guess we agree.

"Maybe not enough." I nod.

"Trey?" Lonnie says standing up. "Won't you have a sit? Talk a bit."

I glance at Trey. He looks at me then he walks into the room. "Sure."

"I like to be blunt." Lonnie says sitting and continuing to enjoy his meal.

"Good." Trey says.

Lane comes in the room whining. He wedges himself in between Trey's legs and watches me. What little boy? You got your daddy. Why you staring at me?

"I try to mind my business. That's not always best. Jayla needs a better man. More specifically a better husband then you. One who is complete."

I chuckle then look at Trey. Of course he had his face balled up mad. But Lonnie kept eating his food. I chuckle at that as the awkward pause feels the room. What are you going to say next Lonnie? You come here thinking you the fix to everyone's problem. What's going to fix this nigga?

"You aren't complete without God."

"Oh." I whisper. "Deep."

Lonnie looks at me. "Living in sin is equally as wrong as murder, in this case, suicide. You did good by getting married. God isn't going to punish you for doing right. He won't punish you for being rich either. But you have to acknowledge him and include him in your marriage. Complete yourself with God and you will be a better man."

"God?" Trey says like he never heard of God.

"Do you think your wife wanted to get married because of her family or because of her relationship with God."

Trey frowns. "Because of her reputation."

"Her reputation?" Lonnie frowns. "Well back home she is the sweet God fearing daughter of Gwendolyn. You know the good one. The one that's always in church. Until things happened at school 6 years ago. If I would have known then maybe she wouldn't have her sweet kids by you. So I won't go back in time. Because God makes no mistake when it comes to the lives that he puts on this Earth. Those boys were meant to be your boys. You were meant to be her husband."

"Yeah." Trey says.

Lonnie stands up from the table. "Would you like to pray with me later? Maybe I can give you some personal advise."

"That's cool." Trey says low.

"Good. Lane?" Lonnie says nodding then he chuckles.

Lane climbs into Trey's lap. "Daddy?"

"Okay, fine, Lane." Lonnie says walking out. "We will continue our game."

"I don't get why you and Cammie hate them so much. They don't seem all bad." Trey frowns.

I shrug. "Cause you older, wiser. Would you have honestly listened to that bull... BS as a teenager? A teenager that recently lost their parent? No. That's your answer. I answered for you."

"Maybe I do need to focus my marriage around God."

"Should have been done that." I say standing up and slapping Lane lightly.

Lane just hugs Trey. "Leave me alone."

I chuckle. "What is this man problem?"

"I don't know." Trey says hugging Lane back. "You okay Lane?"

"I okay." Lane says hugging Trey still. "Uncle Rollie hitting me."

Trey smiles at me. "Rollie don't hit him. He doesn't want to play right now."

I smile. "Sorry."

Bad ass gonna look at me to see my reaction. I leave out of the dining room going into the kitchen. Lonnie was sitting with April talking to her. Of course about God. He can't help take the church everywhere with him. But hell if it help Cammie and Trey then he needs to bring the whole church in this bitch. They need God.

"Rollie." Leah says walking into the kitchen. She touches my arm. "I don't know."

"Okay."

She grabs a bowl. "Did she make some that's not spicy for the kids?"

"My mama doesn't make hers spicy. She also makes the rice on the side." I say taking her bowl. "I'll do it for you."

"Oh..." Leah says frowning at me. "Thanks."

I nod my head at her. She hugs herself just staring at me. "Oh, did Jordan tell you about her grades? She wanted to be the one that told you. She was proud of her grades because she said you would be happy. Like I'm not happy when she makes good grades."

"Cause you fake." I say kissing at her.

"I tell that girl all the time how proud I am of her. She just really soaking this Daddy business up. Don't break my baby's heart."

I hand her the bowl. "I would never. Yours maybe."

She doesn't take it. Instead she eats some out of it cautiously. I look down her shirt as she leans forward. Her titties done grown like she already has milk in them. She snatches the bowl from me then turns my head towards the fridge. I look at my mother. She smiles slightly.

"Didn't hear me, TumTum?" She chuckles. "Did you like the gumbo?"

"Yeah, it was good." I nod.

She nods back. "April said I should have made my curry chicken. I didn't want to make anything too spicy. Plus gumbo can feed a lot. Maybe I'll cook her some another time."

"You should have made a cake."

"You want me to?" She nods. "I can get the stuff for it."

I shake my head. "Don't do anything special for me."

"Gwen, Lane is acting like he doesn't know me."

"I told you not to play that game with him. He doesn't stop his little games. Such a trickster like his mother was."

Lonnie chuckles to himself not saying anything. He rubs her arm then walks away. I leave out of the kitchen. I feel a lot differently towards Lonnie and my mother than I did years ago. I stop in front of Cammie and Trey's room.

"Lane!"

"No!"

I step inside. Cammie wasn't in the room. It was just Trey laying there with Lane on his chest. He was whispering something to Lane. Cammie comes out of the bathroom carrying a medicine bottle. She hands something to Lane. This girl gave him a damn pacifier. He puts it in his mouth then he takes it out looking at it.

"You giving him a pacifier?" I ask.

"He wanted to take his medicine like Caden. His ass wasted it all over the floor." Cammie snaps.

Lane a fucking spoiled ass little boy. I swear.

"That ain't gonna be my child. Imma show you how to raise a man."

"Bitch." Trey says then looks at Lane. Lane stares at him sucking on the pacifier. "You can't even stand to hear someone else child cry. It's a boy?"

"I'm saying it is." I shrug. "She doesn't want to know. She doesn't believe that we should know before the baby is born."

Trey narrows his eyes. "You have a girl it's over."

"You know it's different having Lonnie and GeeGee around as adults. Seems like shit changed. But ain't shit change but me." I say.

"Yeah."

Lane screams. Trey hands the pacifier to Cammie. "Stop."

"That mine!"

"Stop boy." Trey says sternly. Lane just lies there quiet. "Cammie talked with her mother about everything that happened in college. Peacefully. It's a lot of shit we got to get through as a family."

I chuckle. He being fucking modest. Bitch ass really saying he fucking told me so. Fucking prat. Throwing it in my face how he made that happen like he said he was. Then again the nigga didn't say that so I can't fucking say any of that shit. I nod my head at him. He smirks. See this bitch. Lane moves on his chest then gets off the bed screaming. He walks into the bathroom crying.

"Lane?" Cammie says. He just screams. "Okay, okay. You have to talk. I don't know what you want me to do. Tell me."

"I want Daddy."

Trey chuckles. "I'm so ready to be right. Again."

"Bitch." I say walking out.

[haddonfieldproject]

<<PREVIOUS⏺<<CONTENTS>>

1.2.9 HALLOWEEN NIGHT/NOVEMBER 1st 5:13 AM

Warren County, Illinois

While that call did not succeed in waking up Kyndra and Zoey, the aforementioned Diego was woken up, however, by his co-worker Quinn, as he lay napping on a tattered sofa in the SuperFuel Deluxe's break room.

“Diego!”

Diego grunted.

“Diego, get up,” Quinn slapped him with a blue rag.

Diego sat up and rubbed his eye.

“Customers.” Quinn said.

Diego blinked awake. The TV was on. A man with fake looking blonde hair stood in front of a map coated with splotches of reds, oranges, and yellows.

“ Lightning strikes have been reported just about everywhere as this severe cell moves through Warren and Carpenter counties. Listen up if you are in the areas of Russelville, Haddonfield, Langdon, Tuckerville...you are under a Severe Thunderstorm Warning and Tornado Watch ‪until 7:45 am‬. Check out this picture someone posted on social media, that's softball sized hail folks...this reported by Zeke, a custodian working late ‪night tonight‬ at Smith's Grove High School, so be careful out there folks.”

Thunder struck and the lights in the shop momentarily dimmed. Customers, Diego thought, in this storm?

Diego stood up and stretched and then grabbed his Mountain Dew he had swiped from the coolers a few hours ago. Stepping into the shop, he sure enough saw some guy was talking to Quinn, standing next to an old-ass station wagon. The kind that had the wood panels on the side. The bottom was eaten away with rust. Diego was surprised the thing was even running at all, and one of the first things he noticed were the California plates. The lifeless remains of a tire lay snaked around a severely dented rim on the front passenger side. Must have hit a curb without even braking, he thought.

Quinn pulled a clipboard off the dark blue tool bench next to him and said, “We actually just had one of these die on us last week and it's back there in the yard. We can replace the tire and the rim and fix up those tie rods and struts in a jiff. You got really got lucky, because otherwise you'd be waiting at least two days for parts.”

The man's eyes grew wide, “Are you serious?! That's a miracle if I ever heard one.”

“I'll say,” Diego chimed in, “What year is this?”

“1989 Ford Country Squire” Jack Tate said proudly.

“Wow,” Diego laughed. “Quinn's right, we literally just got one of these in, the drive train fell apart in our hands, literally fell apart. But it was much more beat up than this.”

“You don't say!?” Jack put his hands on his hips.

“I couldn't help but recognize the California plates,” Diego motioned to the back of the car, dropping to one knee to examine the wheel well.

“Yep,” Jack said, rubbing his chin, “We're from a small town in Northern California, between San Jose and Sacramento. It's called Summer Glen.”

“Bet you don't get much snow there,” Diego said from under the car.

“Nope..but I bet you guys do.”

Diego appeared from under the lopsided tire with a smile, “Buckets,” he replied, “And it wreaks havoc on an undercarriage.”

“I bet it does” Jack replied.

Diego stood up and wiped his hands on his coveralls. “Well, not so much the snow,” he said, “it's the salt they salt the roads with. Eats the bottom of the car all up.”

“So what do you do?” Jack asked.

“Heated car wash,” Diego said, reaching out his hand to Quinn for the clipboard.

“I saw signs for those on the way in, all over the place up here,” Jack said, “But I saw signs but then it looked like empty parking lots.”

Quinn smiled and handed Diego the clipboard, “With steam coming up?”

“I didn't see any steam,” Jack replied.

“They're probably turned off right now.” Diego remarked, looking over the paper on the clipboard.

Quinn whistled, “Whew don't I know it. It's been hotter than a hippo with a hernia.”

“Hmmm,” Jack grunted in agreement, “Climate Change.”

Quinn hissed, “Hogwash! I don't believe that bullshit for a second.”

Jack quickly changed the subject, “Anyways—err--how do car washes help your car in the winter?”

Quinn nodded, “You drive over the jets and they hose off your undercarriage with heated water”

“That's fascinating,” Jack smiled.

“Well,” Diego sighed, “We have the parts already so we'll charge you a $90 restocking fee, that's mostly 'cuz Quinn here has to run out in the rain and slip the rim and tie-rods off the old car.”

“Aww man, that's cold,” Quinn exclaimed.

“Good news is,” Diego continued, “You really didn't tear her up all that much besides that, you knocked some things loose but we can tighten her up. The labor will cost you $400 easy,, being on the weekend now, and then $140 for the tire, $126 for the rim, taxes and disposal and you're still under a grand.”

“That's wonderful,” Jack said, placing his hands back on his hips.

“What brings you out here?” Quinn asked, “Especially in this storm.”

“My wife got a job out here, she ‪starts Monday‬ so we wanted to get out here as quick as we could....drove straight through.” Jack remarked.

“Wow,” Quinn breathed.

“I need those parts Quinn,” Diego remarked, opening the top of the tool bench and pulling out a socket wrench.

“Oh right!” Quinn smiled. He walked over to the far wall and grabbed a yellow rain coat which hung on a peg next to a Calendar, still on the month of October. A model in a bikini presided over the tenth month. “What job did your wife get out here?” He called from across the room.

“She's going to be the new Chief of Medicine at the hospital,” Jack replied, his eyes on Diego as Diego crouched back down toward the car.

“Oh she's gonna replace old man Mixter!” Quinn remarked.

Jack shrugged.

“Hurry Quinn, this guy said he's got places to be,” Diego said from under the car.

“Oh right,” Quinn said and stepped through the side door that led into a small foyer and eventually either out to the front parking lot or back into the lot.

“So your wife's a doctor eh,” Diego's voice came from under the car, “so what do you do?”

“Well I'm a doctor too,” Jack replied.

Diego emerged from the car holding a twisted piece of metal, “Really? What kind?”

“Well I'm a psychiatrist,” Jack said.

Diego slid back under the car, “A shrink huh?” He said, “You opening up an office here or something?”

“Well no,” Jack laughed, “I'm actually going to take some time off and write a book.”

Diego re-emerged with more twisted metal, “Cool,” he said, “What about?”

“Hypnosis,” Jack said matter-of-factly.

Diego cocked his head to one side, “Really? You do that shit?”

“Swear by it,” Jack replied.

There was an awkward moment of silence and then they both laughed.

🎃

Meanwhile, Ophelia Tate had purchased a small and incredibly over-priced pack of baby wipes and was giving herself the best attempt at a bath she could muster inside the surprisingly clean restroom of the SuperFuel Deluxe. After she finished, she sat on top of a toilet and took an opportunity to catch up on social media.

While she sat in the stall reading about “11 Celebrities That You Would Never Assume Were Gay”, her son Damon stepped into the Food Mart, and wiped his perfectly white sneakers on the welcome mat. An angry looking Indian man looked up as the door bells jingled and then went back to fiddling with some electronic device behind the counter. Damon's first thought was, Why does he keep all that bullet proof glass open?

He casually turned to his left, starting down an aisle chock full of every imaginable brand of potato chip or chocolate or fruity candy---browsing but not really browsing, more just wasting time. The aisle came to a dead-end at a wall of coolers full of soda and water and fruit juices. Damon stopped and caught himself staring at a row of YooHoos when he heard what sounded like a snickering to his left.

There was a small hallway to the left of the coolers, veering off next to an ATM machine. He stepped in front of the ATM machine and peered down the hallway, at once spotting the cause of the commotion. Three young boys were standing in the corner next to a door marked: UTILITY, NO TRESSPASSING. One was a freckled redheaded kid with shiny braces dressed as batman, another was a blonde haired blue eyed boy dressed like Darth Vader, and the last was a much younger looking kid with brown hair and brown eyes dressed like some kind of zombie. They were huddled together, their masks all hanging limply around their necks, crowded around a magazine featuring a hot blonde titled RED RABBIT. The cover-girl’s name was apparently Misty Dawn, and according to the cover caption, she was “Back and Ready for More Action”.

The boys caught sight of Damon and looked up startled. The freckled redhead kid's smile disappeared and his eyes grew narrow, “Hey!” He called, “What are you looking at?”

Damon was unfazed. “Looks like a couple of pervs to me,” he said, stepping toward them.

This apparently took them aback because they said nothing in retort.

“Seriously,” Damon said, pointing at the cover, “How old are you guys?”

Blonde Vader who held the magazine in his hand pressed it to his chest as if it were the most valuable thing on the earth and looked up at Damon with his mouth open. Little zombie boy took a step back. But BatFreckle was not amused. “Why don't you go Fuck Off!”

Damon frowned, “That's not very nice language. Is everyone in this town pervs like you?”

“Where are you---” little zombie started in but BatFreckle cut him off.

“Don't you know that Warren County is the home of the Rabbit-in-Red? What hole did you crawl out of freak-show?”

“Rabbit-in-what?” Damon asked and with lightning speed, snatched the magazine from Blonde Vader.

“Hey!” The wannabe Sith Lord exclaimed.

“Rabbit-In-Red Productions is the world's third largest manufacturer of pornographic media dipshit, and the company is based here in Warren County.” BatFreckle spat.

“So it is a county full of pervs,” Damon said, opening the magazine and thumbing through the pages.

“My dad said a local bunch of church folks fought Mr. Martini in court over decency laws so much, the legal fees drove the church out of business.” Blonde Vader said.

“Shi-yeah,” BatFreckle said, “That's why old man Taylor's up in his house on the hill crying like a pussy all the time.”

“Mr. Who?” Damon asked, closing the magaize and handing it back to Blonde Vader.

BatFreckle snatched it instead and flipped to the table of contents, pointing to a ‪small black‬ and white picture of a middle-aged overweight man. “Lou Martini. He's the CEO of Rabbit-in-Red nimrod, he owns half the county and is like, the richest man in Illinois outside of Chicago.”

“Where are you from?” Little zombie found his place to ask.

“My parents and I are moving here from California, we just got in tonight, got a flat tire.” Damon replied.

“California! That's cool!” Blonde Vader exclaimed.

BatFreckle rolled his eyes, “Beat it California!” He said, “We were just checking out Spitz' mom in this month's issue.”

He and Blonde Vader started laughing.

“That's not my mom!” Little zombie, who's name was obviously Spitz, whined.

“Don't lie, you know it's her!” BatFreckle teased.

Blonde Vader turned the page, and the centerfold fell out, revealing the cover-girl Misty Dawn laying on a bed of white fur naked except for a silver belly chain and and black stilettos. A paper fell out as well and fluttered almost magestically to the floor. Damon bent down and picked it up. It was a flier that featured another picture of the model. The headline read:

SEE COVER GIRL

MISTY DAWN

TUE-SUN

OCTOBER AND NOVEMBER

AT THE

RABBIT-IN-RED LOUNGE

IN

HADDONFIELD

“Look Spitz” BatFreckle said in jest, “You can see your mom's show tonight if you want.”

“It's not my mom!” Spitz whined again.

“Why don't you leave him alone?” Damon said.

“Why don't you suck my balls?” BatFreckle snapped.

“Chill out Lonnie!” Blonde Vader slapped BatFreckle's shoulder and then looked at Damon “Lonnie can be a douche sometimes, I'm Richie Marshall, this is Lonnie Elamb, and he's Spitz. Welcome to Haddonfield.”

Lonnie groused and leaned back against the wall, opening up the porn.

“Cool, my name is Damon.”

“How old are you?” Richie asked.

“17, you?”

“I just turned 12, Lonnie is 16 but he's still in 8th grade...he has to go to special classes at the Middle School.” Richie and Spitz cackled.

“I have dyslexia fuck face!” Lonnie said, throwing the RED RABBIT at his friend.

“I'm 8,” Spitz said proudly.

“What are you doing out of the house at this time of night?” Damon asked, picking up the magazine from the floor and handing it back to Richie.

“Lonnie has his drivers license now, and I just snuck out of my house.” Richie said.

“What about you?” Damon asked, turning toward Spitz.

“His mom's a whore so she leaves him alone to go out fucking for quarters!” Lonnie called.

“Stop it Lonnie! She is not!” Spitz cried.

Damon ignored him and Spitz continued, “My mom works late nights at Jamie Lee's Diner, she doesn't get home till morning. My grandma watches me but she fell asleep and I...I snuck out too.”

“We just ate there coming in,” Damon said smiling.

“My mom is Taylor,” Spitz said.

“She was our waitress.” Damon replied.

“His mom's a slut!” Lonnie called.

Spitz started to whine but Damon put an arm around him, “Why do you hang out with this asshole? Is there anything else to do in this place than look at naked chicks?”

“There's an arcade in the driver's lounge, but I don't have any quarters.” Spitz said.

“Come on,” Damon said, “Show me where it is.”

Richie tossed Lonnie the magazine to followed Damon and Spitz. Lonnie caught it, rolling his eyes, he was perfectly happy right there looking at boobs.

🎃

Damon stepped into the shop area of the SuperFuel Deluxe and shook off the rain. There he saw his dad sitting on a folding chair listening, as another man held a lamp under their family station wagon from the Jurassic era. A third man was under the car working. The man holding the lamp was droning on and on about baseball. Damon didn't really care for baseball, or any sports for that matter.

“And then the Sox brought in their reliever, that guy Stroop, and he just completely fell apart. He hit two batters and walked another, and before you knew it the bases were loaded.” Quinn was saying.

Damon walked up to his dad. “Is that so---” Jack replied, but was startled when Damon tapped him on the shoulder.

“What is it son? You're not supposed to be back here.” Jack looked up at Damon.

“There's an arcade inside and I was wondering if you had any change on you?” Damon asked.

Jack leaned to one side and pulled his wallet out, withdrawing a 20 dollar bill. “Can they make change?” He asked.

“There's a change machine,” Damon said flatly, taking the money.

“You can play all of that, what the hell, it's been a long few days,” Jack said smiling.

Damon stuffed the twenty in his front pocket and turned, “Thanks,” he said.

“Tell your mom I'm in here,” Jack called after him.

“Haven't seen her,” Damon said as he walked out, without turning.

Quinn started up again, “So you know that big Dominican for the Cubs, Agu...Agu...something.”

“Aguilar,” Diego called from under the car.

“Yeah, Aguilar,” Quinn corrected himself. “Well he steps up to the plate and first pitch...bam!”

NEXT>>

[gretavanfleetlife]

Only Time Will Tell:

Chapter Two

AN: Thank you guys sooo much for the amazing feedback in the last chapter!! I tried to write this one as fast as possible without compromising the quality of the story. Hope you all enjoy!!💕

Warnings: Swearing

Word count: 2,330

You are woken up by the sound of a car honking loudly outside your bedroom window. You open your eyes slowly and let out a wide yawn as you glance at the clock.

"Shit!" you curse as you throw your covers to the side and race towards your closet, tripping over your dirty clothes that lay scattered across the floor.

"Shit shit shit shit..." The honking continued as you reach into your closet and grab the first things that you touch, not bothering to see what you chose before throwing them on. You try running a brush through your tangled hair before giving up and quickly tying it up in a loose ponytail.

You grab your bag and rush downstairs, continuing to mumble profanities as you call out a brief goodbye to your dad.

"What did you say y/n? I can't hear you over all this goddamn honking!" your dad complains through a mouthful of bacon. You sigh and jog briskly into the kitchen to give your dad a hug.

"I said I'm leaving now," you repeat, "bye dad." He waves you off and continues to devour his meal. Your stomach grumbles but you know that there's no time for breakfast, so you grab an apple on your way out the door instead. You walk swiftly towards Josh's car and see him shaking his head at you while continuing to honk the horn. You give him a quick wave and hop into the seat beside him, relieved that Josh has finally decided to stop making so much noise as he takes his hands off the wheel, crossing his arms.

"You're late," Josh complains as you buckle your seatbelt.

"Good morning to you too," you reply sarcastically, "sorry, I must have slept through my alarm."

"Woah, isn't your phone set to play Safari Song? How on earth did you manage to sleep through that?"

"I guess I'm just so used to tuning out your voice that it wasn't a problem," you shrug, grinning and hitting his shoulder playfully.

"Ouch," Josh replies, smirking at your tease, "hey isn't that Jake's shirt?" he asks you, noticing your outfit and giving you a confused look. You look down at your t-shirt for the first time, reading the words 'Church of Rock and Roll' printed across it.

"Yeah, he gave it to me when he grew out of it," you shrug, taking a bite out of your apple.

"If you say so," Josh replies, clearly unconvinced.

"What is that supposed to mean?" you chuckle.

"I'm just saying if you're fucking my brother you could have at least told me," Josh says, keeping his eyes on the road while earning a slap and a groan from you, "which is not ok by the way!" he states, shaking his pointer finger at you and furrowing his eyebrows. You let out a giggle and shake your head.

"You know I wouldn't," you smile lightly.

"I know you used to have a crush on him when we were younger," Josh replies, raising his eyebrows at you while throwing you a glance. Your eyes widen as you almost choke on your apple.

"You knew about that?!" you shout.

"Y/n everyone knew about that. You weren't exactly subtle," Josh laughs, watching you shield your face with your hands.

"Alright fine...whatever that was ages ago. Can we talk about something else please," you smile at Josh, blushing furiously as you remove your hands from your face and drop them into your lap.

"Alright, if we must. Are you excited for the last day of school?" Josh questions as you speed down the road towards your high school.

"I almost forgot actually, summer took way too long to get here," you reply, thankful for the change in conversation as you relax into your seat. "I'm even more excited for your party tonight though!" you grin giddily at Josh who returns it with a wide smile of his own.

"I can hardly wait," Josh beams as you pull into the crowded parking lot of Frankenmuth High. You thank Josh quickly before hopping out of the car and slamming the door, briskly jogging into the school. You walk hurriedly to your classroom and open the door, giving your teacher a brief apology before taking your seat at the back of the class beside Sam. You give him a quick smile but notice he doesn't return it.

"Hey," you whisper.

"Hey," Sam responds, not bothering to look up from his phone.

"What did I miss?" you ask Sam, who puts away his phone and takes out his math binder.

"Nothing," Sam whispers as he puts in his earbuds begins copying down algebra questions from the board at the front of the classroom. You sit in silence as he scribbles down numbers and you glance at your phone, noticing a text message from a very close friend of yours.

'Danny: wanna get pizza for lunch?'

'Y/n: definitely. Meet me at your locker.'

You quietly nudge Sam who takes out his earbuds and looks at you.

"What y/n?" he sighs.

"Danny and I are gonna get pizza for lunch, you coming?"

"I dunno, maybe," Sam says, returning his attention to the equations in front of him.

"Oh, um ok," you stumble, slightly shocked that Sam doesn't want to eat lunch with you, and especially Danny, his best friend. Maybe he's still upset about whatever he was worried about yesterday. You have an idea of what might cheer him up, so you nudge him again, "Hey are you excited for Josh's party tonight?" You whisper excitedly.

Sam drops his pencil and frustratedly turns to face you, "Maybe you should just do your work and stop obsessing over the fucking party," Sam spits loudly. He sighs and turns his back to you. You are stunned at Sam's harsh words, having no idea as to why Sam was so pissed at you. You and Sam didn't say another word to each other for the remainder of the class. A long hour later, the bell rang and you left quickly to head to your next class, not wanting to interact with Sam after his bitter outburst. You spend the entirety of your next class daydreaming until the bell rings for lunch. You walk to Danny's locker and see him rummaging through his bag, his long black hair falling over most of his face. He throws his bag over his shoulder and closes his locker, smiling when he sees you standing next to him.

"Hey y/n."

"Hey," you reply, "let's go I wanna talk to you about something." Danny follows you as you lead the way into the crowded cafeteria. You grab some pizza and walk towards your usual seats. You set down your tray across from Danny, who looks around the room, confused.

"No Sam? He always sits with us," Danny asks.

"That's what I wanted to talk about," you sigh, receiving a worried look from Danny. "Sam's pissed at me for some reason but I can't figure out why. Has he told you anything?" Danny shakes his head in response while taking a large bite of his pizza.

"No, he hasn't said anything," Danny frowns, "I've noticed he's been pretty distant lately though, really quiet too which is weird for Sam. Usually, I can't get him to shut up." You give a small laugh and continue to eat.

"I dunno Danny, but whatever it is he better get over it soon before the party tonight!"

"Yeah, it should be fun. I'm planning on asking out Mackenzie tonight, just between you and me," Danny says as you beam at him.

"It took you long enough! That girl is all over you," he smirks and waves his hand dismissively.

"We'll see," He mumbles.

The rest of the day dragged on, leaving you very tired and causing you to sleep through your third period biology class. Heading towards your final class before summer officially begins, you nervously hum a tune to yourself as you head towards the music room. Avoiding Sam has been easy so far, but you know that you will have to interact with him soon. You take a seat at the back of the class, across the room from your usual seat beside Sam. You take out your guitar and begin to lazily play the tune that has been stuck in your head since the day began. You close your eyes and sway to the music, ignoring the chatter and quiet music that fills the rest of the room as other students began to practice around you. As you near the end of your song, you open your eyes and catch Sam watching you play from across the room before he quickly looks away, busying himself with his bass guitar. You smile as you feel a familiar blush creeping onto your face. Sam has always loved listening to you play guitar, and you used to play together all the time growing up.

Your music teacher steps into the room and briskly declares a sectional rehearsal. You were hoping this wouldn't happen since you're in a group with Sam as well as a few others.

"That's just fucking perfect," you mumble to yourself as you walk into the small practice room with your fellow group members. You sit down beside Claire, a talented pianist with long brown hair, practicing scales on an organ. Ethan, a tall, muscular boy with short blond hair and stunning blue eyes enters the room next. He takes a seat beside you, holding a guitar similar to yours as you see Sam following him in and sitting across from you. The rest of the class is spent jamming with your group, playing songs that you've rehearsed several times before as well as improvising tunes as you play. You and Ethan are focused mainly on each other as you both concentrate on harmonizing your guitars. Every now and then you share a smile with Ethan as you appreciate the beautiful sounds of your dueling guitars. As you play you can feel Sam's eyes on you, but you refuse to look at him, letting yourself relax into the music instead. The bell rings and Sam immediately gets up, rushing out of the practice room without a word. Claire follows him out, and you are left alone with Ethan as you both put away your guitars.

"You played great today y/n, you're a really talented guitarist if I haven't said it before," Ethan smiles as you head out into the halls together.

"Thanks, so are you!" you beam as you admire his kindness. You find yourself blushing slightly. It isn't the first time that you've admitted to yourself how attractive you find him. You get an idea and start to fiddle anxiously with your bracelet.

"Hey um, a friend of mine is throwing a party tonight, would you want to come? Most of the people in our grade will be there so I figured you might be interested. Unless you're not which is fine too, there'll be drinking and shit which might not be your scene so..." you ramble but are quickly cut off by the feeling of Ethan's fingers entwining with yours. You look up at him and he smiles back at you.

"It sounds great y/n. I'll be there." You give him a wide smile as the two of you walk towards your locker, both of your hands still laced together. You give him more information about the party and he listens intently.

"It'll be this address at around 8:30," you say, scribbling down Josh's address on a loose piece of paper before handing it to him.

"Thanks y/n, see you tonight," Ethan says, smiling as he leaves down the crowded hall. You watch him go and feel your heart flutter as you pack your bag and head outside towards Josh's car.

"look who finally decided to show up," Josh calls to you from behind the wheel, "What took you so long?"

"Just talking to a friend," you say as you hop into the backseat beside Danny and Sam. You decide to tell Josh about Ethan after the party, not wanting to get his hopes up in case nothing ended up happening between the two of you. "Hey Jake, Danny, Sam," you say as Jake greets you from the passenger seat and Sam ignores you, staring out the window.

"Nice shirt y/n," Jake smirks at you as you share a knowing laugh with Josh.

"Jake and I were just picking up some supplies for the party tonight," Josh informs you, motioning to the many cases of beer stacked in the trunk.

"I figured," you respond, sharing a laugh with Danny.

"We're planning on practicing when we get home, you wanna listen in?"Jake asks you as you shake your head at him.

"No that's alright, I think I'm just gonna take a nap," you reply as Jake nods, turning on the radio as you drive to the Kiszka house. Normally you'd love to listen to the boys perform, but you don't feel like being around Sam. Once you arrive, the twins bring the cases of beer into the house as you head up to Josh's room, flopping on his bed and hearing the faint clinking of bottles in the kitchen. After a while, you fall asleep to the distant sound of rock and roll coming from the garage. You dream you're at a local bar listening to boys' band, Greta Van Fleet, play their music for the crowd as you dance and sing along. You have a feeling they'll make it big someday, they're too talented not to.

Your dream comes to an abrupt end as you are startled awake by Josh, shaking you wildly as you groan and open your eyes.

"Y/n wake up! It's 7:50 already you've got to get ready!" he yells in your ear. You smile at him and bounce out of bed, eager to get ready for the busy night ahead of you.

Taglist: @aliensforleaders @obetrol-and-cocktails @goodoldfashionedqueen @kiszkaboi @greta-gvf @rogers-wristbands @strawberry-fieldsssss @littlegeekwonder @spngvf @mutantpanda54 @allons-ytomyworld @diggrycedric @sammysgirll @rogerinascigarette @thaliamessi

[kyunsies]

MADCH MADCH <3

hello fam - I've had a weird day, I'm super happy I can take the time out to reply to you. always thinking of you though, I hope you're always having a great day. today's been a bit of a non day - a family member has to deal with operations and that's on top of me too so i've just felt a bit winded in life?

YES to you finally conquering that damn cold! do you feel properly replenished now? omg i hate sore throats too - okay i hope this doesn't give you nightmares but when i was a kid i saw a documentary about this terrible disease that manifests at its worst a bit like alzhemiers but it can hit anyone of any age and for the majority of people who get it... one of the first symptoms is a sore throat and i have literally lived in terror of sore throats ever since. but luckily it's a very rare disease. so basically, yes, i understand you.

OMG you know when you're like eight and you don't want to sleep and you're like no i will adult and stay up and it will be glorious - i'm like, CHILD YOU FOOL you could have gone to sleep XD and ugh no responsibilities?! i remember working most of the time when i was a kid and i kind of wish i had wreaked havoc? what was your childhood like? did you get to do lots of fun stuff? i know my mum wishes she had been able to spend more time with me when i was a kid and i'd like to have a family and i'd love her to be able to relax and just spend time with her grandkids? OMG well when you come to europe let me know and then i can show you around and give you a hug in person!

so we're mainly cofe here though cahtolic culture is still big and honestly i'm with you. like religion can be a great influence on you if it's not used in nefarious ways and can help you learn so much - like even if there are things you don't end up agreeing with at least you learn about then so you can make a choice for yourself as opposed to not really knowing anything? agree - people that are really boastful totally put me off, i just can't deal with it at all. but you're right, like it makes us so so hard to forgive ourselves for anything right? like, even if we've done nothing wrong and we shouldn't have to punish ourselves? like i swear i'm apologising for everything haha XD once someone pushed me off the tube and i ended up apologising like ON REFLEX? hasjdkahds XD but i really hope you have people around you that keep bigging you up too! if not i will keep bigging you up :D :D so you know that you are worth it.

i'm sorry you're not looking forward to your final year of uni! think you're almost there though - like this is the final stretch and you'll have like conquered everest you know?! and even if your landing at the end of it isn't as perfect the fact you landed at all means so much and that means you can stand up again and keep going! day at a time and moment at a time you know? i kind of had this moment today (hence my wierd day) when i was worry about everything and i literally sat there like - have i made the right choice and done the right thing and surely i've made the wrong choices in my life and do i actually have any talent cause if not people would actually like my stuff and i had to just be like... a moment at a time sometimes you know? like, just bit by bit and don't sweat the stuff you don't have to? idk i find it hard to do but i hope that helps you - like you'll surmount every little thing bit by bit and before you know it you'll have made it! you were born ready you were <3 <3

TINY SQUAD IS GO! the pant dilemma is truly a massive issue, like IDK how to deal OMG OK SO LAMPSHADING is like when you do big baggy like tops and then like leggings or tights or something skinny on the bottom so... you look like a lampshade? like i guess it makes you look cute and then also it's such an easy way to dress without worrying if you look like a kid that's wearing your mum's clothes?? ahsdjakdhsa XD

AHHHH YES BASIL ME TOO!! what scent did you end up buying? i'm sure it was lush - are your parents near you or is it like a massive special occassion to get to see them? YES agree with your take on musk though! like it feels like idk, something a 50 year old with a cigar in a stuffy country club would wear? like, there's no energy to it but not in a chill mellow way either??! like even if i was going to a dinner thing I would still rather not wear something musky? like i'd still rather it be something a bit sweeter? also like some musk perfumes can be SO STRONG? like i'm like - my nose is choking on this perfume XD

YES BLUE MOON SQUAD AAAAA it is literally one of their finest ever, it's always stayed on my top faves list by them. like ugh yes to the lofi stuff sometimes i just wanna VIBE and be in my feels but not so much i'm too angsty but enough that I'm FEELING feels ya know? what did you think of kiss or death? it really wasn't that kind of vibe but yh i hope they do more lofi jazzy stuff - also cause like not a lot of korean groups play with that sound a lot?

hello mädch's mom as always! nerer apologise for being late, always just happy to hear from you and i hope you are super super well and looking after yourself first and foremost! more than anything <3 (also i take ages to reply too ya know and omg this is so so long ahsdjakhdaskjdh)

love you lots and lots and lots xxxxxxxxxxxx

ANGEL ANGEL !!!!!!!! <3 i know i'm really late to this LKDFJS i've had such a busy week getting some overtime in and then visiting my grandparents' house so i didn't really have a lot of energy to reply to all of this BUT IM HERE AND i can finally give u a good response <3

firstly is your family member okay??? i hope so ;____; how was the rest of your week, and how was your weekend angel? i hope u were able to enjoy your weekend and that everything is okay in the family <3

but YEAH my mom and i are over the stupid cold ;_____; i hate colds,,,, they last way too long lol like i say i know the flu is a little more serious than a cold but i would rather have it for a day or 2 than being stuck feeling lousy for a whole week :( ALSO SLDKFSJDFKLJ OH GOD SEE we are both hypochondriacs ( that's not the best trait to have as a nursing major lol ) but tbh i'm really curious about this rare disease ????? :o sounds really scary tho goodness gracious i wonder what it could be ;____;

also god i was always awful at staying up late as a kid LOL but i know what u mean !!!!!! honestly there was only one time i can recall i had a sleepover with my friend in like the 3rd grade and we tried pulling an all nighter so i think we made it to like 5am but i had to go to bed omg i felt like such garbage LKDSFJ </3 it's just funny bc like as u get older u realize that staying up late is really nothing special and if anything u feel like a train hit you the next morning and adults are so sleep deprived as it is we just *try* to prioritize sleep SLDKFJSDKLJF :') you worked a lot as a child bub?? what kind of things did you do? i didn't start working until i was 15 bc most places here don't allow u to work until this age (unless you're in a family business i guess lol) but all the jobs i had in high school i hated so much ;_____; but my childhood? i would say it was relatively normal LOL like we say all the time i've had a single mom so life was really stressful for her but i always felt loved <3 i always had my mom <3 and we took trips to the beach with my family every year, it was our little tradition !! i went to san diego to visit disney, you know little trips here and there !! and then when i got into my sport and i started getting older my mom and i spent a lot of time and money investing into my sport so most of my weekends consisted of a lot of tournaments and driving far away for me to compete :') i do remember when i was really young like in kindergarten my mom's work was really far away from my school and we had a recital ; i was the "host" where i would introduce all of the songs and stuff and my mom didn't get off of work until like 6 and by the time she made to my recital, it was over :( she told me she cried a lot that night :( i don't remember her doing this (i don't even remember the recital all that much lol) but now that i'm older and i understand more about adulting, i'm sure she was so devastated thinking about it now :( anyways about visiting europe LOL I WILL DEF GIVE U A CALL AND LET U KNOW SO U CAN SHOW ME ALL OF THE COOL PLACES <333333

and about the religion ....... yes ;____; i think it's a great thing if a family decide that they want to do this when they're families; i hope to continue to practice it (even tho we aren't regularly going to church at all hhhh gotta work on that) but there is something about catholic guilt specifically that just makes it soooo hard to like, be easy on yourself? but ,,,,,, i guess it keeps me grounded :( in a self depreciating way ??? LDSKFJ I KNOW U UNDERSTAND ... it's weird for me to put into words ;____; and YEAH :( i think i'm getting a little better at this but i used to apologize all the time for things i never needed to be sorry for hhhh (still do) :')

and yes babe honestly i'm really terrified to start uni :( i think i have this weird anxiety issue i've had it ever since last year but i don't know why i'm so scared and anxious about things that haven't even happened yet ;____; are u like this too? is it normal? i wish i knew :( i guess i won't really feel better until i have made it to graduation, but i just want to do well this year. whatever i do, whether it's exams, or clinical rotation or my preceptorship, i just want to do well ;____; i don't want to do poorly, i want to make my mom proud and i want to work at a place i'll be excited to work at, and most of all i just want everything to work out ,,,, i wish someone could just sit me down and say listen i know what you're going thru is hard but you CAN get thru this and EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OKAY NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS bc no one in my family is in the health sciences (besides my cousin who is studying to be a doctor but she doesn't give a shit about what i do lol) so ;_____; yeah ,,,,,,,,,,, lots of anxiety and apprehension of the unknown :(

LSDKFJSD FOKAY NOW I KNOW WHAT LAMPSHADING IS LMAOOOOOOOOOOO yes i wear those clothes on lazy days LOL the thing is i'm really picky about the length of my oversized crewneck sweaters hhhh the can't be too long bc if it goes below my butt i look like i'm wearing rags LOL so i have to be careful :') but most days i do like, reverse lamp shading lDLKFJSDLKFJ i like wearing flowy pants with a more tight top or like baggy jeans with a tighter shirt or a blouse i can tuck into my jeans LOL but omg its so funny i didn't know what that was :') thank u for the explanation my love <3

OKAY BUT HALF THE REASON I DIDN'T RESPOND IS THAT i was saving this weekend to go to the jo malone store in my mall and !!! I GOT A NEW SCENT AND I'M IN LOVE WITH IT SO MUCH BABE ;____; you have to go smell it if you go there soon and tell me what u think !!!!!! it's called wild bluebell (here is the scent description lol) but the guy behind the counter helping me was soooo amazing and helpful like they really do treat u the best at the store and AH i’m so happy with my purchase <3 my wallet isn’t so much LDSKFJ but nonetheless i know i’ll have it for a long time :)

KISS OR DEATH !!!!! i actually really enjoyed it lol i have seen some ppl not really like the rapping so much but i loved it ;____; i’m super biased obviously LOL but gosh i thought they were all great and minhyuk + hyungwon killed the song for me <333 wouldn’t expect anything less from our monstas !!!!! and my mom is sending her love lol i tell her the work u do and she’s always wondering how ur doing :(((( same for my moots she always asks me about 2 in particular LOL she’s always asking me <3 i love u so much bubbie !!!! iM SO SORRY FOR BEING LATE MY LOVE again i always just want to give u a quality response <3 i love u the absolute most and i hope u had a great weekend !!!!!!! this is my last week at work before i have a week long break before i head for uni so :’) can’t believe i’ve done all this LOL :’) i will be happy to hear from u whenever u come back hun !!!!! TAKE CARE LOVE U <3 

[rainycl0udss]

Chapter 2;

The party of the year

//When can I say "I love you"?//

Written part!

Word count; 2843

Moons pov

It has been two hours since we arrived at the Halloween party and I already managed to lose my friends.

Again.

I stand at the bar alone and look around the crowd. I absolutely hate crowds.

I pick up my glass of water and move to go and find my friends.

This is the last time that I'm giving in to them. I knew it was a bad idea.

They were kinda right that I don't spend that much time with them anymore but that isn't my fault. I'm just really busy with school. Music isn't going to produce itself and films aren't going to shoot themselves either. It's alot of work, definitely if I want to keep my scholarship. I can't afford to lose it. Daniel always tells me he would pay for my studies and that I should enjoy myself, but I know he doesn't have the money to do so. Plus I am perfectly enjoying myself in the studio.

My thoughts are interrupted when I suddenly hear someone yell my name.

"MOON!"

I look around to see where the voice is coming from.

Then I feel a hand on my shoulder.

I turn around to identify the person who just touched me.

"Here you are, I've been looking for you."

It was Jae-hwa. And what does she mean, she been looking for me. I have been looking for her.

"Jae, where have YOU been? I've been looking for YOU. Where are Mimi and Yun?" I ask her.

"Well..." She stared.

I can already feel that something happened. Something I probably don't want to know and definitely don't want to get involved in.

"... Mimi drank a bit too much..." She continues.

" When does she not drink too much?" I tel her while rolling my eyes.

"She dank so much that right now she's puking in the bathroom." Jae finishes.

I just sigh.

Honestly I'm not even surprised anymore at this point. Mimi always drinks too much. It was bound to happen at some point that she was going to puke it all out.

"Are you serious right now?" I sigh.

"Yeah and it doesn't look to good." Jae notes.

"Wait a hot second, why are you here when Mimi is puking her guts out in the bathroom? Couldn't you better have stayed with her?" I ask

"I didn't leave her there alone you moron, Yun is with her." She informs me.

"That's the same as leaving her alone. Or am I wrong?" I argue.

There falls a short silence between us. Or well, as silent as it can get at a party in a club.

The silence only confirms that I am right.

"She didn't look that drunk yet..." Jae mumbles after a while.

"Let's just fetch those two drunk bastards and go home, I've had enough." I decide.

Jae just nobs at me and pulls me along to the bathroom.

This is exactly why I hate going out. So much people. So much noice. Strangers making out with other strangers and let's not forget Dumbass friends who are picking all over the place.

We finally arrive at the bathrooms.

"Jae, Moon tHerE you GuYs aRe." Yun slurs out.

Yep, she is definitely drunk"

"Eumm... She WaS hErE jusT a MomeNt aGo." Yun giggles.

"Yun? Are you trying to tell me you lost Mimi? Because I hope to God you are not." Jae barks

Well, this ain't good. Not at all. This is bad.

Yun doesn't seems to be bothered at all by the turn of events.

"I dIdN't lOse hEr, I jUsT doN't knOw wHerE sHe is." Yun tries to argue.

Key word; tries.

"YUN! You are supposed to be the oldest here!" Jae angerly yells out.

"I shouldn't have left you both alone.." she then mumbles.

Just before Jae has the chance to start yelling again I hear an all to familiar voice.

"Guys here you are." I hear a cheerful voice say. It's none other then Mimi herself. She sounds oddly happy for just puking her guts out.

"Mimi! Where were you? Why the fuck would you just leave?" Jae yells. Ones again.

I have a feeling we will be going home soon.

I like that feeling.

"I didn't leave, I just went to another bathroom stall. Mine was a little dirty from, you know.." Mimi replies rather calmly.

At this point I'm not sure whether she is completely wasted or wether she actually sobered up a little.

"Let's just all calm down and try to stay together for the rest of the party, alright?" Mimi suggests.

"Or how about we just get the fuck out of here and go home?" I hint.

"I lIke MimiS iDea bEtTer." Yun replies.

"Nobody asked for your opinion Soo-Yun." Jae hisses.

I hear Jae sigh.

That is not good.

"I'm JuSt saYiNg, I waNna sTay sO I cAn trY anD fInd My SouLmAtE. Isn't tHat WhY we cAmE in ThE fiRsT pLaCe?" Yun slurs out.

That probably means we'll be here for a while. This sucks.

"I guess you have a point there, I don't wanna die alone either." Jae agrees after a second.

"Let's get to the dance floor bitches!" Mimi then yells out and pulls me with her in the direction of the dance floor.

This night is turning out to suck even more then I thought it would. That statement alone says it all.

"I'm just gonna sit over there yeah?" I excuse myself while sneaking away from Mimi.

Without waiting for a response I turn around and walk over to the bar.

If I'm going to be here for the rest of the night then I at least deserve a good drink.

And here I am, ones again, alone at the bar with a drink in my hand. This time I at least know where my idiotic friends are. I look up at the dance floor to see all three of them moving their bodies in the rhythm of the music.

Lord do I hate parties. I do have to say that the dj isn't that bad. The music sounds good mixed up. But I guess you don't need to be a pro to be able to do that.

An hour later and I'm still in the same spot I was in the hour before.

I've got to say, things didn't escalate.

Yet.

I look up from my third drink of the evening. Only to see Yun grinding on a guy, Mimi making out with a guy and I can't see Jae at the moment.

I sigh ones again.

I'm way to sober for this shit. But I can't get drunk right now. That would mean I would be hungover tomorrow and tomorrow I have a bunch of stuff to do.

I take the last sip of my drink before I put it down on the bar.

Sometimes I really question why I'm friends with them. I guess because I literally don't talk to anyone else but them. We also have known each other since highschool, so that might be another reason why.

I get pulled out of my thoughts when I hear an unfamiliar female voice on my right side.

"What are you doing here on your own?" The female voice asks me gently.

I look up to the side and look right into some soft brown eyes.

"Eum., I eum I just don't really feel like eum feel like dancing." I stutter out.

I mentally face palm. Damn Moon, you can't even talk to another girl.

"Did you come here alone?" The gentle voice asks me.

"Eum.. no I'm here with my friends." I reply as steady as possible.

"That's good to hear, I've seen you sitting there for over an hour doing nothing at all. I got a little worried so I thought I should come up and ask you." The gentle woman explains.

"That is very considerate of you unnie." I smile up at the gentle female.

"Oh no, where are my manners. My name is Areum, you can call me Ari unnie." The gentle voice tells me, who I now know belongs to Areum.

"It is nice to meet you Ari unnie, I'm Moon." I introduce myself.

"Nice to meet you Moon, so, what are you doing here alone?" Ari unnie asks me again.

I sigh for the one hundred time this night.

"I'm not really a party person, but sadly my friends are. So they convinced me to come along with them. I'm regretting it tho." I ramble.

"Sounds like a pain." Unnie giggles.

I laugh at her statement.

"It is a pain." I laugh a little.

"Do you want another drink?" Unnie asks me.

"No thank you unnie, I can't afford to get drunk tonight, I've got alot of work to do tomorrow. I also have to stay sober because I'm fairly sure I'll have to dive tonight. Let's not forget my friends who I have to look after. I'm their babysitter after all." I ramble on.

"Not trying to find your Soulmate?" Unnie asks curiously.

"I'm not really churching for them .." I begin.

"Oh? That's unusual. Why not?" She wonders.

"Well, if I'm meant to be with my soulmate I believe I will find them without trying. Why try so hard when it should happen naturally. And even if it wouldn't find them, I wouldn't really care...." I explain.

"That is an interesting way of seeing it. I do understand your philosophy, many people just see it different then you do." She responds

Most people think it's weird that I don't want to find my soulmate. They all think I don't give a fuck, even tho that is partly true, it isn't completely the truth. I wouldn't mind finding my soulmate, I just don't think I should do such an extensive church for them. I want to be together with a person because I like them for who they are, not just because they're my soulmate.

I get pulled out of my thoughts when I hear Ari unnie continue.

"Although, I do know someone who thinks the same as you." She recalls

"Tell them I agree and that they're not the only ones who are strange." I reply while I giggle a little.

We talked for probably an hour like this.

We talked about anything really. She told me about her friends and her husband. Apparently she's already married to her Soulmate. She doesn't look that old tho?

Overall, I was actually enjoying myself.

I look up at the dance floor ones again to check what my friends are doing, only to find out that I no longer see any of my friends anymore.

You can't be serious right now.

I literally don't look for five minutes and they're gone.

"I'm really sorry Unnie, but I really have to find my friends. I can't see them at the moment and God knows what they're doing right now." I inform her.

"But ofcourse Moon, I didn't mean to hold you up at all." Ari unnie expresses.

"You did not hold me up at all Unnie, I actually quite enjoyed talking to you." I confess quickly.

I definitely don't want her to think she was bothering me. I'm happy it was her who started talking to me instead of some random guy who tries to get in my pants.

"Why don't you come to my coffee shop sometime, I'd really like to talk to you again." She smiles at me.

"You own a coffee shop?" I ask her surprised. She doesn't look that old.

She only looks a year or two older then me. I guess it's possible to own a coffee shop at such a young age, it's just very surprising.

I think she could see the surprise on my face because she stared to laugh before she started to talk.

"You seem rather surprised that I own a shop." She continues laughing.

"I'm sorry Unnie but you just look rather young, not much older then me and I'm only 20..." I mutter.

"Oh dear, I'm 26 years old right now. So that is not that near your age as you think." She smiles at me.

"But thank you for thinking I look so young." She continues.

Suddenly I hear someone yell, I'm pretty sure they're telling my name.

"MOON?!" Yep, that's my call.

"I hear you have to go to the rescue. And who am I to stay in your way " unnie jokes.

"But before you go, my shop is called Blooming, please do consider coming." She says quickly while waving at me as she leaves.

"I definitely will unnie, thank you!" I yell while walking away from her.

She was very nice, I honestly enjoyed talking to her. She is probably the best part of this night.

"Moon, jUsT wHo I nEedeD." The slurring voice from Mimi says.

I already regret leaving the bar.

"What do you need me for Mimi?" I elaborate.

"I tHinK it'S tImE to Go hOme And yOu neEd to drIve." She tries to explain to me.

Ofcourse that's why. I'm actually rather happy that she wants to go home, Because I do too.

"Where is the rest?" I ask her because there is no sign of Yun or Jae.

"Jae is AlreAdy By tHe car." She responds

"Oke that's good, where is Soo-Yun?" I imply.

"I'm..... Not sUrE..." She mumbles to herself.

I facepalm.

Did they seriously lose each other again. This is ridiculous.

"Just..eum.. just go to the car and wait in the car with Jae yes? I'll just go and find Soo-Yun..." I begin to explain to her.

But I soon realize my idea is very bad.

There is no way she would find the car on her own.

Fucking great.

"Nevermind, I'm bringing you to the car and you'll wait there." I reply quickly and drag her with me to the car.

Ones we arrive at the car I see Jae sitting next to the car on the ground.

"Get of the ground and get your asses in the car." I exclame frustrated.

Luckily both of them do as I say and get in the car.

I close the door and walk back to the party.

Great, now I have to find that little midget in here.

Then I feel a hand on my shoulder.

I turn around and am faced with very familiar soft brown eyes.

It's Ari unnie.

"You seem stressed my little coffee bean, what's the problem? Can't find your friends?" She asks rather worried.

Wait, did she just call little coffee bean?

Nevermind that, I've got no time for that, I need to find Soo-Yun and get us home.

"You can say that, I only can't find one. The others are already in the car." I try to explain quickly to her.

"Want me to help you out a little?" She asks me.

I don't think I've ever been so happy with help that I have been offered.

"That would be very kind if you want to help me." I practically marvel.

She gives me a kind smile and nobs as a sign for me to keep walking.

It didn't take us to long to find her, only about ten minutes. I think that's a new record.

After Ari unnie and I found Yun, we walk to the car.

I have no idea what the hell she has drunk this evening and I have a sneaking suspicion that I don't want to know.

One thing is for sure, it was way to much.

Ones all three of them are in the car I turn to Areum.

"I can't thank you enough for helping me out." I cry out.

"Absolutely no problem little coffee bean, I'm happy to help. But can I ask for a little favor?" She chimes

"Ofcourse unnie, what do you need? You want a lift home?" I ramble.

"No coffee bean I don't need a lift home, I've got one but thank you anyway." She smiles at me.

I urge her to continue talking.

"You have to promise and come by my shop, yes? I'd really like to have a coffee with you little coffee bean." She grins.

She then gives me a small cart with an address on it and contact information.

"Ofcourse unnie, i promise to come next week." I promise her.

She seems pleased with my answer and gives me a hug before going back to the party.

After she left I get in the car and drive the four of us home.

Ones we're home I get everyone to their room and then go to mine.

I actually had some fun tonight.

That's a first.

I dress up in my PJs and jump in my bed.

I look at my phone and notice it's already 03:18 am.

I had no idea it was that late already.

I lay down in my bed and turn on my alarm.

Tomorrow morning is going to be a pain.

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[guardiandae]

my cat is really the only thing keeping me alive. I don't have anyone who truly cares for me. When I make a friend I cling too tightly and scare them off. I'm so alone, and what little life I have is falling apart because of it.

As lame as it sounds, try checking out local clubs, class, groups. There’s lots of things to do for free. Find something that you will enjoy, maybe a free art class, or writing group, or book club. Join purely to have fun for yourself and better yourself, but be open to meeting people and having conversations and you may be surprised with the connections you can make with others. Ask them about family, work, hobbies, and/or interests/dreams and let them talk about themselves, show interest in what they have to say, ask specific follow-up questions, be friendly and engaging and try to maintain eye contact. Mimicking some of their mannerisms can also build trust with people, like if someone talks with their hands a lot, try to gesture more when you talk. These kind of things are proven ways to make people feel closer to someone even when you’ve only just met. 

If you’re religious, finding a nice church to attend is also a great opportunity for socializing before or after the service, plus they have usually have bulletin boards for additional groups and events, and people are usually very friendly and will probably break the ice with you first, especially designated greeters. Even if you aren’t religious, there may be a Universalist Unitarian group near you, which is like a secular, nondenominational church. Members can be any faith, or none. The unifying beliefs are things like social justice, environmentalism, humanitarianism, etc, and not any particular religious dogma. I’ve been to two UUs - the first one was boring (everyone disliked the new minister tho) but the socializing was nice so I stayed for that, and the second one was amazing on all fronts, but I’ve been too busy to attend.

If you’re in high school or college, the same idea basically applies - join a club, join a sports team if you’re physically able to. Even past sign-up dates you can sometimes join late (less true for sports) but try asking anyway. It’s hard making friends at first sight sometimes, but make a good impression and when you’re seeing the same people on a regular basis, friendships are likely to form. Invite them to hang out with you outside the group, or if you’re offered to hang out, accept the invitation!

Also... it’s easier said than done... but try to stop the clinging. Be engaged with them, show interest and care for them, but pull it back some and keep a respectful distance and don’t bombard them, especially when beginning a friendship. That’s why I say, if you join a group, join one that you will like, that will benefit you, because I find that’s what interesting people do. They have hobbies, they have interests, they have recreational activities, they have themselves built up and figured out. Kind of like the idea that “you have to learn to love yourself first”. 

Tbh, I’m still at this stage - I am very aloof, I don’t tend to particularly reach out to people first or do a good job replying sometimes, I can go weeks without really talking to anybody, much longer with people I know irl, I don’t have hobbies and things that I do besides work, watch videos, and write. That’s why I have no friends and when people ask me ‘what do you do for fun?’ I always panic trying to think of an answer because everyone else is hiking and biking and gardening and I’m just writing gay porn ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

**NOTE: All of this advice applies to making in real life friends. If you want to make online friends, then, holy shit, ‘watching videos and writing gay porn’ are ideal interests to bond over. Just message somebody, practically anybody, and see if the friend ship sets sail. Online friends are valid too!

[elvenprincessoflothlorien-blog]

I'm taking a short break off this rp blog. I just don't really have the muse right now. 

Don't know when I'll get back on but I will eventually.

Until then.