#i'm going to herniate

[iravaid]

no bitches image but with lacroix

hey there, tumblr user asimplefairfolk, before i show you this image i need you to know that 1. drawing this caused physical pain in me and 2. this thing's existence is your responsibility now

[sungtaro]

[catboii]

logs on

floods the dash with cats

vanishes for another month

[nobodybetterlookatme]

.

[anexperimentallife]

EDIT: CRISIS AVERTED, THANK YOU!

Interracial US family w/ disabled autistic dad and toddler needs to get to the US for medical treatment

(New post because the old one was getting LONG with the updates. Details are under the "read more" to save your dash, with updates in the notes.)

TL;DR: If I'm going to live long enough to watch our daughter grow up, we need to get back to the US and get set up in a disability-friendly place where I can use my medical benefits.

Although I was already disabled (autism, adhd, and spine, joint, and head injuries), my health was stable--until four bouts of COVID left me immunocompromised, and utterly destroyed my health (including damage to my heart, blood clots that damaged one eye, neurological and joint issues, etc.), and although we started off fine, we've been hammered with one crisis after another, both medical and financial, that no one could have predicted.

Until we have enough to get back to the US, a chunk of whatever comes in has to go towards medical care that can't be put off, so the sooner we can reach critical mass on that, the better.

If you can help, or reblog, or share the links on other platforms, we'd be grateful!

The "Donate to Little or None" Paypal donation link takes the lowest fees, I think. (Kept the same link from when we were fighting to get our daughter's birth certificate fixed so we could get her citizenship affirmed.)

Then there's Ko-Fi:

And my little sister started a GoFundMe for us!

EDIT: The donation links above still work, but I removed the GoFundMe link.

IF YOU WANT ALL THE DETAILS SEE THE "READ MORE."

(There's more in my "rob gets medical" tag if you want a blow by blow account of how we got to this point over the past few years, but this is the gist.)

HOW IT STARTED:

I moved to the Philippines six years ago, after the deaths of my adult sons, in part to make my disability payments stretch further. Shortly afterwards, I was joined by my now-wife @thesurestthing (also from the US) for what was supposed to be a visit, but which turned into a permanent arrangement.

After I got a contract to license an old story for a mobile game (which tripled our income*), we found out we were having a baby, which was fine, because despite my disabilities (autism, adhd, two spine injuries, traumatic brain injury, a herniated esophagus, joint issues, etc.), my health was stable, and thanks to the contract, we were fine financially as well.

HOW IT STARTED GOING DOWNHILL:

Zoey's pregnancy was complicated, requiring two hospitalizations, and our daughter's birth was complicated, too--requiring a C-Section--which tripled our hospital bill. A few weeks after our daughter was born, the aforementioned contract was canceled without warning. THEN, when we tried to register our daughter's birth with the US embassy, we discovered an error on her birth certificate that left her stateless, and which took nearly two years, all our savings, and a fundraiser (thank you, generous people!) to resolve. Combined with medical expenses, that left us in a lot of debt.

A brief summary of went else wrong (leaving a lot out for brevity's sake):

I got COVID three four times during all this, became immunocompromised, and developed a slew of other medical issues (heart damage, eye damage and temporary facial paralysis from blood clots, persistent infections, a worsening of my joint issues, neurological issues, etc.) as a result of Long Covid.

I've had to be hospitalized a couple of times, undergo surgery, and was on an oxygen machine twice--once for an entire month, while I was bedridden. As of 24 January, 2024, I'm still recovering from my fourth bout of covid, which started at the beginning of October 2023.

There's a lot more, but you get the idea. COVID has completely wrecked my health, including tearing up my immune system.

And yes, I'm as fully vaxxed against COVID as one can be in the Philippines, with all available boosters, but again--I'm immunocompromised, plus they don't have the vax for the newest variant here yet. Zoey is vaxxed, also, and as a result, her bout with covid was extremely mild. El isn't vaxxed yet because they won't give the covid vaccine to kids under five here, but she's been able to share Zoey's antibodies from breast-feeding--which is apparently a thing.

The only way we can see for me to stay alive long enough to watch Eleanor grow up is to get back to where I can use my Medicare and VA benefits**.

WHY SO MUCH MONEY?

First, while we're still here, we need to pay for whatever medical care can't be put off. Plus, since I'm now immunocompromised, we have to get LOTS of vaccinations before we have to spend 24 hours or so in crowded planes and airports.

Second, we're going to be arriving with only what we can carry with us on the plane, and we'll need to get into a place near a VA hospital that I can easily get around in while I'm recovering from surgeries and getting various treatments. We'll need to pick up some secondhand household goods, and some kind of used transportation (because, you know, it's the US, where you kind of need a vehicle to get around).

We'll also need enough on top of my and El's disability payments to get by for a couple of months while Zoey looks for work. And all this is while we're still paying off the debt from the stuff I mentioned above.

So we're figuring that unless we catch some very lucky breaks, it'll probably cost between 20K and 36K altogether.

(We can't simply stay with friends when we get back, because literally every single close friend we have in the US with extra room and who lives close to a VA hospital has cats--to which I have a severe anaphylactic reaction. As in my entire respiratory system shuts down, and I have to be rushed to the ER to keep from dying; this has happened more than once. The only way I can be around cats is if I'm on immunosuppressants, and my immune system is ALREADY compromised, so I CAN'T do that.)

So again, if you can kick in, or reblog, or post our crowdfunding links (or the link to this post) on whatever other platforms you use, we'd appreciate it.

(*When I told social security about it, they said I could keep getting disability, too, because licensing IP rights didn't count as work income, and since it was a Moldavian company, it also fell under a special tax clause for getting paid by a foreign company while living overseas, so no taxes on it, either. )

(**VA benefits--I was a cold warrior in 1980s Germany. It was less than forty years after WWII, there was a lot of sabre-rattling--some of it nuclear--and we were there as a deterrent to prevent in Germany the kind of thing that's happening in Ukraine right now. Disclaimer because I'm tired of people accusing me of "invading" folks in the early 1980s when I was a dumb, heavily propagandized pre-Internet kid fixing generators in Europe. I wouldn't join today even if I could.)

[angryschnauzer]

January 11th 2024

Yeah its been a while since i updated. I haven't had the energy to if i'm honest, but here we go.

Hubby had his brain surgery end of November '23. The tumour they took out was a nasty one, somewhere between the size of a golf ball and a kiwi fruit. The wound has healed well with little to no side affects apart from some double vision, but he was checked out for that and it is a common after affect of brain trauma and was remedied with an eyepatch for a few weeks.

We met with the Neuro Oncology team at Royal Marsden Hospital in London. They are one of the best (if not the best) cancer treatment centres in the whole country, and we worked through a treatment plan.

Just before Christmas hubby was also cleared to have shoulder reconstructive surgery (he broke his shoulder bone in the original seizures back at the end of October '23). There was a really small window of time between it being enough time after the brain surgery that he could go back under general anaesthetic, but also enough time to mostly heal before he started Radiotherapy and Chemo, so just 5 days before Christmas hubby was in and out of our local hospital in a single day to have that surgery.

Christmas was a quiet and subdued affair. I also herniated a disk in my back the day Hubby had surgery (i was clearing the deep freeze out ready for grocery delivery), so it meant both he and I were dosed up to our eyeballs on strong painkillers for most of the holiday, and Little Dude spent the majority of the break either playing video games or building his new lego sets.

Two days before Christmas i also had to have emergency dental work (i had been grinding my teeth and had previously cracked a tooth) and whilst i was in the dentists office some utter idiot crashed into my car. That was the last thing i needed but i simply handed it all over to my insurance company (who are aware of my husbands situation) and they arranged a hire vehicle and sorted repairs.

Onto the start of 2024. This is the first week of Radiotherapy and Chemo for Hubby. He is getting very tired and fatigued already from the Radiotherapy, but thankfully no nausea from the chemo as yet, but that could change over time. He is scheduled for a full schedule of 6 weeks of this dual treatment, where we are having to visit Royal Marsden every day Mon - Fri for the six weeks, and then he also takes the chemo 7 days a week for the six weeks.

He'll then have 4 to 6 weeks 'off' treatment for his body to relax and recuperate, but will have scans and MRI's during that time to gauge what further treatment will be, but its likely to be just chemo but a stronger dose, but no radiotherapy. The chemo is to be 3 weeks off one week on, so a 4 weekly cycle.

The one thing we have discovered isn't done is prognosis's. When we first got to Royal Marsden we were shocked as they started talking about years, and explained that although it was a really nasty tumour, it was found very early and whilst it was still relatively small for its kind. They've discussed things like 'this years treatment plan then we'll look at next years', and also for a while Hubby was being considered for a clinical trial which candidates who have prognosis's of 12 months+ are only considered for. In the end he didn't meet the criteria (his cholesterol was too high). The Macmillian Nurses also have been talking to us about Mobility Car assistance schemes where you can get govt assistance financially and get an adapted vehicle on a 2 year rolling lease. All these timings are reassuring in one way, but worrying in another - we have no idea what the future holds and it really does cement in stone that our time is limited and could end any moment, and makes it very difficult to make any long term plans. You don't realise how much of your life is preplanned until you end up in this situation and aren't sure if you can book your kid onto the school residential trip in 5 months time.

Should anyone want the mundane daily day-to-day life updates you can follow me on my personal instagram @simone_with_an_e its generally a load of utter boring bollocks, but i try to keep it updated daily with updates when i can as its a lot easier to do 1 short paragraph than a big update.

For me my mental health is a little better now that i've had time to process Hubby's diagnosis and that he is getting treatment. There are still days or hours when i fall apart, and it could be something as simple as listening to a song on the radio as i drive back from dropping Little Dude at school and i realise the song would be lovely at his funeral. I end up having to pull over and have a cry whilst switching the radio off. I'm loosing weight and aging quickly, my hair is turning grey from stress and i realised i've aged about 15 years in the last 3 from stress. My appetite comes and goes, and things like red meat now turn my stomach and i can't digest it. But i also haven't drunk alcohol since the day before Hubby had his seizure back in October. I feel like i need to stay 'alert' in case i need to rush him to the hospital for something. I don't miss it as such, but I miss the ability to fully relax. Its hard to describe but i feel like at the moment i've lost myself and am just functioning to care for those around me, going through the motions as such.

Anyway, this has been a long update. I do still lurk here, you may see me pop up in notifications liking something, but at the moment i don't feel its right to start putting fandom stuff back on here yet. I do hope to get back to writing at some point. I miss it and the unfinished stories plague my mind as i have such lovely plans for story arc's and really want to finish them.

Take care all,

Schnauz

xxx

[memories-of-ancients]

Having back pain. Been going on all November so far. Seeing doctor in a week and a half but already suspect it's a mild form of bulging or herniated disc. Pain not horrible but still annoying at times and it is much better than two weeks ago when at points it was really painful. Worse after sleep but recovers with stretching, exercise, low dose OTC NSAIDs (naproxen 200 mg twice a day seems to work best), and just going about my day. By the time I go to bed it feels normal or almost normal but by morning it's aggravated and sore and tight feeling (herniated discs often get aggravated by sleep which is one factor that rouses my suspicions). Trying different sleep positions and different pillows to help.

Anyway, I just ordered this pregnancy pillow and honestly I think I would want one of these even though I'm a man and even if I didn't have back problems .

[soaps-mohawk]

Hey push it to Sunday, we can wait your health is more important then any fic. Please I hope it's nothing serious, if it is I'm so sorry doll. ~ local pocket dragon offers there plush keychain to help with the pain.

Thank you, love. According to my X-ray results, I have some mild disc space narrowing and degeneration between L4 and L5 in my spine 🙃 apparently no herniation which is cool, and it's possible the nerve pain is unrelated. It's going to be a long couple months treating it though.

[fannyrosie]

I've followed you for quite a while and I've always loved your style plus I lived vicariously through your life in Japan lol. I'm sorry if you've already posted this I couldn't find the post but I was wondering why you left Japan. It's my dream to live there one day and I was curious what it was like.

I have answered that in my Instagram Stories, but here is the long story version (TL;DR: I came back mainly because of my poor health):

I left Japan after 6 1/2 years for several reasons, but one the main reason is because of my health. I've never been the healthiest person, even before moving there (I was even dubbed "the sick one" at my old job because I often had to suddenly leave work in the afternoons). I was constantly tired and had really bad abdominal pains. I saw several doctors in Montreal, and all I managed to get was a diagnosis for IBS and anxiety. However, I was functional most days, and managed to work and live relatively normally, as long as I rested a lot and stuck to my FODMAP diet.

During the few first years of my life in Japan, my physical health remained that way, with some random very bad health periods, but overall, I was fine. I even started to workout regularly to improve my posture and muscles. However, from 2020 onwards, my health declined significantly. On top of my worsening IBS, I started having really bad spine pains, radiating to my head, chest and arms, and making me so tired I had to take several days of rest every time I went out. I started to catch every little virus I got in contact with, and had to avoid taking public transport the most I could. I was working from home, and walked a lot, so that was manageable, but it made me more isolated.

I saw several doctors, but even though they did blood tests and x-rays, they couldn't find anything and just assumed it was stress. After reading about EDS, I thought I might have that (since I am also hypermobile), and had to wait 7 months to get an appointment at Todai's hospital. However, on the day of my appointment, I got told that Todai only deals with EDS related to heart issues, and my tests were all normal, including my x-rays. That was in June 2022, and was the final straw, as it proved that even the most advanced hospital in Japan couldn't help me. By that time, I had to wear a back brace to do the most basic things, like laundry or going to the supermarket, and was taking painkillers every day. I had to stop working because I couldn't work on my computer for more than 2 hours a day. Obviously, no work=no money.

Coming back to Québec, I had to wait 3 months to get back on the public health system, and as of today (6 months after being back), I managed to get x-rays and MRI showing I have: discopathy (degenerative spine disk disease), osteoarthritis (degenerative joint disease), several herniated disks in my cervical region and pinched nerves due disks collapsing. Basically, I have the spine of a 70 year old. I have been referred to a physiatrist, but we all know that Québec's public health system is very slow. so God knows when I'll see one. Nevertheless, they found something, which is better than all the doctors in Japan who told me it was just stress. Japan sadly has a big culture of having to "endure" pain (mental or physical), and it shows in their medical system.

Due to the degenerative nature of the illnesses they found up to now, my health is constantly getting worse. I used to have good and bad health days, but now, I have more bad health days than good health days. I still take painkillers every day and wear my back brace to do normal tasks, but most days, these are not enough. I am trying to make the most of my "good" health days by dressing up and doing nice things, but I never know how I will be the next day (or hour).

I had to take two breaks writing this; hopefully it makes sense haha

[wyrddogs]

In regards to my thoughts on the podcast, I guess my agonies over Kermit's back screening scores were for nothing. Whether he has two calcifications (per OFA) or five (per INCOC) doesn't really matter. X-rays aren't even good at detecting them, and they aren't a good indicator over whether a dog will have a herniation event anyway. He's CDDY/CDDY, so he's at risk, which I already knew.

So I'm back at square one (scary square), which is basically cross my fingers and hope. And follow all the best practices, which are keeping my dog fit, trim, and intact, and minimizing the hard landings, and letting him run up and down the stairs, and basically letting him enjoy his life.

He's also insured.

And because he is so cobby and struggles with the A-frame and dogwalk (he has a hard time getting enough speed to scramble up it, compared to a lighter and more springy-backed dachsund), I'm comfortable keeping him off the obstacles for the rest of his life.

As for the bitch I'm getting, this breeder is not like a Belgian breeder where she has every aspect of temperament and working ability and various drives and size and COI etc. etc. etc. taken into account, and you are matched with your puppy based on what you are looking for. She's what appears to be a pretty typical hound breeder where here is a litter of puppies, here is a bitch, have fun. I'll see if I can ask for a girl with longer legs to see if I can get a CDPA dog, but it's going to be a crapshoot.

Which I already knew going in. So this has changed almost nothing for me. I'll continue screening Kermit's back every couple of years just to see if we can track any changes, and I'll do all my own health testing for my bitch like I did with him.

And I'll cross my fingers and hope.

[copperbadge]

Good morning everyone, and welcome to Radio Free Monday!

Ways to Give:

dapperanachronism linked to a fundraiser for Chris and Nina, who are trying to recover after Chris lost his job for pushing back against illegal labor practices. While he was unemployed, their car was repossessed; he has a new job offer, but needs a car for it, and he will lose his employment without it. You can read more and support the fundraiser here.

Nikki is currently working on paying off back rent owed and with fall cold approaching knows that her utilities will go up; they're raising funds to help cover groceries, winter boots, and back rent and bills. You can send funds via paypal to ncdavis1701@yahoo.com or via cashapp to $ncdavis1701; she's requesting donors add a brief note what the funds are for and where they came from.

rilee16 is raising funds to keep the lights on; their roommate, with whom they have had a number of issues, has begun running appliances all day to drive up the bill. You can read more, reblog, and find giving information here.

thishazeleyeddemon is president of Sacramento State's new Secular Student Alliance, which will be hosting Dr. Darrel Ray, a psychologist and author, to speak on recovery from religious trauma; they'd like him to come speak on October 12th, but need to raise funds for a speaker honorarium; when I visited this morning the funds had been raised but I'm sure they could use the extra going forward. You can read more and support the fundraiser here.

Help For Free:

treesah is asking folks to come out and vote for her friend, Rachel Raydo, on Inked Originals, a contest where she's in the running to win $20K and be featured in Inked Magazine; her tattoos have very personal meaning for her and tie into her recovery journey, and winning would mean a lot. Voting is free, but requires a Facebook account or credit card to prevent bots. You can participate here!

marveltrumpshate, a fandom charity auction focused on Marvel characters, ships, and universes, is open for sign-ups until September 30th; you can offer various forms of fanwork or service (fic, art, editing, graphics, podfics, videos, merch, etc) and auction winners donate their bid amount directly to one of the nonprofits on the list. This is the sixth year for Marvel Trumps Hate, which has raised $178K since 2018! You can read more and sign up here.

Recurring Needs:

frenchroasted's cousin, who has been fundraising for a used wheelchair-accessible van after herniating her back lifting her stepson's wheelchair and had to have surgery for it, has partnered with MyDMDHero which is now hosting their fundraiser on GiveButter so that their donations are tax-deductible. You can read more and support the fundraiser, formerly at GoFundMe, here.

And this has been Radio Free Monday! Thank you for your time. You can post items for my attention at the Radio Free Monday submissions form. If you're new to fundraising, you may want to check out my guide to fundraising here.

[adventuresasmrsfindley]

Reminder for all my psychological thriller girlies - Freida McFadden's new book came out yesterday!! I have 3 books waiting for pick up at the library too but I think I'm going to read hers first. Lots of good reviews out already!

I have been so drained this week. We went HARD on the socializing all last week and over the weekend and it all caught up with me. We haven't had anything going on this week yet and I have been thankful for that. Knox is going to my parents house for a sleepover on Saturday. Y'all will be shocked - but I plan to read 🤪 I'm sure we will do something for the Super Bowl but by then my battery should be nice and recharged lol

This is the first year ever we aren't going to get a tax return (I don't think). We owe close to 2 grand to state which wipes out basically all we would get from federal. This is based on Turbo Tax so I am gonna try a couple others to compare but it sounds like the general consensus this year that people aren't getting much if anything back. Lovely considering life is more expensive than ever!! Bonuses at work are also down. I haven't heard what mine is yet but I'm not getting my hopes up. Cole is on the verge of needing back surgery for a herniated disk and that will put him out of work for like 2 months. SO. To say I'm stressed would be an understatement!!! What can ya do though? Life sucks and then we die. 🙃

[tumbleweed-run]

been a while since we've heard from you or seen your writing, I hope all is well? How's your novel going? I'm always rereading all your gale fics lol

I appreciate the check-in. This isn't the only ask I've gotten so I do appreciate everyone.

I'm here puttering around still.

Not to sound like someone coming back from a hiatus with a wild story but I herniated a disc in my back in December. As someone in their 30s is known to do (btw if you guys didn't know I'm 32, like a whole ass adult).

I haven't been writing much. Honestly, I also haven't played BG3 in like... two months? But it is currently downloading to my PlayStation, so that might fix the radio silence.

Never fear I will inevitably be back when something reminds me of Gale, or I see a particular fanart that makes me feral.

[lifewithchronicpain]

When you're disabled, it's okay to push yourself sometimes, but that push should have a goal. So for instance, I'm recovering from surgery and sometimes I push myself to go places so my foot can work properly again. However when it comes to my herniated disk, pushing myself will always result in more pain and can do nothing to really help my back. So then pushing myself becomes a means to hang out with friends or complete a task.

The ultimate point I want to make is that pushing yourself to seem abled is never a good idea. Even when I'm doing so to hang with friends or go shopping, I plan recovery around and still have limits I know I can't exceed. When abled people insist we're not pushing ourselves it comes from a perspective of having no idea the effort we expend doing normal activities.

Whether or not you push yourself doing an activity, it should be your choice, have a positive goal, include recovery & limits, and never be out of shame from ableism. No disabled person can push themselves into being abled. So take care of yourself.

[angryschnauzer]

12th November 2023

I know some of you lovely people have been worried and have contacted mutuals to see if there is an update on my husband, so rather than have their inboxes clogged with asks i thought it best to update you whilst i have a spare moment.

Whilst hubby was in Swansea hospital he had an MRI and full body CT scan. The MRI showed a tumour on his frontal lobe that was 3.2cm long. This is classed as a major tumour. They advised that to have it treated in Wales we would have to relocate there and change address, which just wasn't feasible as our 8yo son still needs to go to school and it's better we come back to our home near London.

My Dad very kindly drove all the way to Wales to pick us up and drive us back, i wasnt in any fit state to drive so we had to abandon hubbys car at my MIL's.

Now that we are home we also learned that in hubbys seizures he broke his shoulder bone where the force of his muscles seizing was so strong the tendon ripped the bone in half. He also herniated 3 disks in his back, and has thankfully had osteopathy on those to help them heal.

We are now waiting to be seen by a Neurologist this week. Hubby is 99% likely to have brain surgery to remove the tumour. A biopsy on the tumour will then happen and if its found to be cancerous then he will have chemo and radiotherapy.

He's well in himself, and the short term memory loss/temporary dementia he was showing signs of have now eased thankfully. He's struggling with the broken shoulder as its his dominant arm, and will need surgery to fix it, but due to the severity of the tumour that takes precidence. I'd rather have a one armed living husband than a dead one with a mended arm.

Little Dude is holding up ok. He doesn't know it could be cancer and he doesnt even know what cancer is. We've told him Daddy has a lump in his brain that he will need an operation to remove, and might need some treatment afterwards to make sure it kills off the infection.

Ironically things i have been chasing for little dude medically for months finally got put into place this last week. In addition to his type 1 diabetes, he finally had his Asthma assessment and was confirmed to need an inhaler, and this week coming i finally have an appointment for him to be assessed for ADHD which i have been asking for him for years to be assessed.

So thats the update. I'm trying to stay positive but its a worrying time.

[ilikecarsandlike4people]

Right, so, a bit of an update: Getting back to work, my sick leave is ending soon. I'm actively working on comms, that's kind of why posts have been a bit infrequent. Sorry, I work very slowly. I've been seeing my family over the weekend and I'm finally back home, hopefully I can manage alone🌸 Putting the health update under the cut, tw discussion of medical terms. Hope you have a great day! -R

So, got back the whole MRI report from my doctor, apparently what we're looking at is lumbar degeneration with a herniated disc. This however is not the cause of all of the various symptoms I am showing, because the disc alone is NOT capable of causing them. Knee showed no signs of arthritis, which is very good, blood work showed some weirdness with my iron levels so, that's being taken care of.

So, moving on, I am going to be starting PT rehab next week, hoping to see some improvement. new supplements, new meds and a dash of hope, heh.

Since this is not the sole cause of the symptoms, I haven't been able to get a conclusive diagnosis which means I have to return to work. I cannot take more than 60 days of sick leave per year without a valid diagnosis, so that is kind of... stressing me out.