#i'm always nervous on the first day
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Today was the first day of the semester and it went well! I left my last class thinking about how much I love my job and I'm really excited to see what kind of work and research my students are doing.
#personal#i'm always nervous on the first day#and i'm teaching science writing#which is new for me#but I have a repeat student#which is nice#that they want me as a teacher again!#unfortunately teaching wears me out#and now I am Tired
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vote for starstruck in the grand finals of the kirby oc tournament!!! 🙏🙏🙏
there's only a day few hours left, and she successfully turned it around from the first poll update, so there's still a chance she could actually do it!!! 🥺💖
i still can't quite believe we made it this far in the first place, and Valfrey is an impeccable opponent!! win or lose the whole tournament has been such an honour, and it's heart-warming to know that so many people out there are supporting this totally normal waddle dee!!
thank you again so so much!!
#starstruck dee#my art#finally posting some propaganda and campaigning!! been nervous most of the tourney but i'm giving it my all for the finale!!! 🎉🎉🎉#i'd like to get one more thing up before voting ends but we'll see if i can!! been so pressed flat this week unfortunately!#had to queue all my propagandas days ahead because i have no computer access 😅💦#terrible timing for RL stuff and multiple events but isn't that just always the way 🤣#but we fight on!!! we persevere!!!!! can we do it?!! can she win?!!#for all those fallen waddle dees who were taken out in the first three rounds!#for the girlfailures!! for the airheads!!! imagine if a ditzy little pink thing wins this!! a victory for soggy pathetic things everywhere!
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#ok finally making a post about meds#I've not ever tried taking medication before. I was sorta raised with that classic 'dont rely on meds you have to learn to manage without'#I mean I was also raised with the idea that therapy is stupid unless you have 'real' trauma. and also like idk.#can't stay home from school unless your temp is over 100 or you're throwing up. etc. very suck it up mindset#so I was just really nervous to start. also of course worried about losing myself or whatever I know that's a silly fear but#it's also a common fear for a reason!!! anyways#so I finally was like 'I need to do something' when I realized I was so anxious I couldnt even get myself to go outside alone#like I just don't want to do ANYTHING alone to a detrimental effect. and it was butting into my ability to do my work...#for various reasons. but then ALSO adhd has been a constant issue with my work as well!#it is SO hard to write and draw on a weekly pace like I am without being able to focus#my whole life I've had these terrible nightmares constantly and I've always woken up constantly in the night#sleep has always been terrible so I've always dreaded going to bed.. ESPECIALLy because it didnt even make me less tired#it was more something that I just did because I had to.#but going to bed was always terrible. there have been times I was too scared to go to sleep for weeks on end...#I've been mitigating this for years of course. and recently I've been taking melatonin which has been helping too.#but I've also always struggled to get up. because I've always been EXTREMELY exhausted#but also anxious of what the day might bring... idk.#anyways it has all hit a point that I was like okay. I am doing as many coping mechanisms as I can. the psych said they were good too#but... it just has never been enough. it's never been enough to make me not tired it's never been enough to make me not scared#so I finally talked to the doc about it. and she was like youve def got smth wrong basically. which yah I know.. but yknow#anyways so I started taking wellbutrin. and I am so frustrated now. because it's WORKING#that constant looming sense of dread is gone. I'm excited to get up. I'm excited to go to bed BECAUSE I'm excited to get up#I feel like for years I've been holding on to the idea that I have to get up because I have to put something good out into the world#and I've been clinging to knowing that if nothing else. I am able to help other people feel better.#but now for the first time in my life I'm like. free of it. I didnt even know it was possible... and I'm so sad how much I've lost out on#and so frustrated how my whole life I've been told to put up with it and push through it. and treated like a failure for it being too much.#and just. It has only been 2 weeks. but the lack of anxiety is SO noticeable I'm so...#I'll never miss it. the adhd is still pretty present but like whatever. I can manage that better.#and I'm just crying because of all this combined.#I just. I hope I get to finally be the best I can be now. for myself but also for you guys!
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I did a vine theme for pumpkin carving this year. A pumpkin pumpkin and a rose pumpkin.
I'd made a poll asking whether to do vines or draw Dan and Valerie from Danny Phantom, or both. ...And although 'vines' won, the idea of adding something Dan and Val related was too compelling. The thought of deep red roses with their thorns being like Valerie. ...And, well, I suppose Dan's like a big heavy pumpkin being thrown at stuff?
I tried making the plants wrap around an object representing them, Dan in a D shape and Valerie in a triangle shape. Though it's not very noticeable.
#pumpkin#jack o lantern#halloween#vines#roses#danny phantom#dan phantom#valerie gray#asj post#asj art#the Valerie one turned out better. It was the second one I did. I changed methods a little for it.#oops. I got the trigger for Valerie's multi-weapon wrong. I should've checked.#(the weapon was once misidentified as her Ecto-Grenade Launcher; but that's actually a different weapon.)#I also thought the way pumpkin flowers are oddly brighter in the center might give a ghostly look. Though I hadn't carved them very well.#I would've gone about it differently if that had been the second pumpkin. I'm always too nervous during my first pumpkins.#These are the largest pie pumpkins I've bought so far. They're a little bigger than two years ago and a lot bigger than last year.#They're 25 and 24 inches in circumference.#...It took a day and a half to carve each one.#The 1st pumpkin I scraped out the vines. But for the 2nd one I did a vector technique on the vines and leaves where I drew outlines & dug.#...I still think pumpkins aren't really vines but it's simpler to say that as a shorthand for 'climbing plant'.#I might add some alternate views in a reblog later.
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everything's coming up roses
#my art lol#vocaloid#flower vocaloid#v3 flower#blood tw#decapitation#tw decapitated head#yeah fukase's here but i'm not tagging him for. reasons. thats enough maintags i think immm nervous. feel like i'll get nerfed#womp womp random ass emo shit w/ no explanation once again... based off a doodle i did while bored at work#and it looked good enough to turn into a full thing so ye. also experimenting in the ibispaint that i like never use 😭😭#drew this the day before gakupo's bday lol i guess i can only draw one (1) purple loid good atm 😔😔 and her v3 isnt even that purple#it was gonna be v4 originally but v3's design worked better for composition purposes. sorry v4 i swear i love you too#but i think i will forever be a little bit based towards v3 since that's how i first knew flower. sorry 🥴#lowkey an indirect sequel/prequel to that other drawing i did a long ass time ago if you wanna think about it like that lmaoo?? but not rly#i feel like i could've put more in this but idk i also didn't wanna overfill it w/ stuff. also man i can never draw heads to scale bruh#always terrified i draw them either too big or too small. and that's even when attached properly to a neck
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I’d love to know about T’Rahni’hk’s starfleet entrance exam if you’ve thought of a back story for her about it
She stayed up all night devising an incredibly well-crafted speech and then stayed up another night memorizing it so she wouldn't make any mistakes and then she delivered it perfectly and though she looked a bit tired she seemed confident (she was) and put together (she was) and eager to join with excellent marks - so she was accepted. It was only after she joined Starfleet and began at the academy that her anxiety began to worsen slowly until she's at the point I typically draw her v_v It was a very gradual downward slide over the course of several years - but hey, that's college ain't it~? THANK YOU for your interest~!!!! I gasped when I saw this ask hehehe~
#Q&A#T'Rahni'hk#T'Rahni'hk: I'm gonna fight this social anxiety!! [enrolls in Starfleet] DAMN. SOCIAL ANXIETY GOT HANDS!!!!!#The important thing about T'Rahni'hk is that she still tries her best every day even though she's nervous all the t ime#and things don't usually go her way and a lot of the things she does end up blowing up in her face#she still tries!! and she still gives it her absolute all!! It's why she's still in Starfleet - she wants to keep going. she always has#hope that next time will better! It's that same confidence that got her in in the first place~#bee doodles#star trek ocs#Vulcan oc#A T'Rahni'hk question~!!! <3 AAA I'm so happy~
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I'm not out yet, but I was able to get away with wearing a pride shirt that my grad school department made. Today was the first time I wore it in public. I'm working at the school library right and someone came up to me and told me they liked my shirt and happy pride. I'm over here smiling and trying not to cry. That was the first time someone told me happy pride in real life. Today's a great day. Happy Pride y'all!!
#I was honesty a little nervous about wearing the shirt#my mom actually bought it for me at this ceremony but she wanted to get me another shirt that represented the event#but i always wanted to get this one so she ended up buying me both#when i first brought it home my brother made a comment about the rainbow and did it have to say pride#i never wore it since because i didn't want him to say anything#anyways at work i have name tag with my pronouns on them 'she/they'#which I've only told my friend and i keep it at work so my family doesn't know#it's pretty sad how i have to hide part of myself when I'm at home but nice to see the community outside of my house#my family aren't the only people in the world and that's not going to be my life forever#I'm trying to practice gratitude and find the little things in life every day so I don't get all down about everything else#it helps for the most part#one comment can really mean so much to a person and change their day#i know today was a good day#happy pride#lgbt#queer#pride#nonbinary#aroace
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It's dead af at work. We got through our four reservations and have had no walk ins, and my manager won't cut me because he hates doing my job (and we're friends and he knows I need the money) and tbh I don't want to be cut (can't really afford to be) but I'm actually going insane from sitting on my stool, going through Tumblr, Insta, Kindle, then standing up and going through those apps again, then sitting down and going through those apps again, etc. it's nice to get paid to do nothing, because tbh if I was cut then I'd just be doing this but in my bed, but I'm getting so fucking restless.
#truly im unneeded rn#my other manager gave me the option to be cut before my shift even started but again. I'm broke af#so i came in. and im getting paid $15 an hour to scroll through all of my apps#and im trying to be mildly productive#trying to do some resding because i didnt resd as much as i wanted this month#to make up for it i finished three books in the last two days and im going for a fourth#one of them i had already started. one was pretty short. and one was so good that i tore through it fast#this is a more difficult story. about a school shooting. not super fun but a good story nonetheless#you ever read a book and then want to forget it so you can read it for the first time again?#i just read jumper by Melanie Crowder and it was so good. although apparently the diabetes information isnt accurate#but the story was very very good and kept me interested the whole way#the problem with this school shooting story is that its good. it draws my attention. but its understandably very hard to read#fourteen ish minutes until my paycheck goes through and then i find out if i can pay rent this month#that's part of why im restless too. nervous about paying rent. my job hours are unpredictable and so are the paychecks#i think ill be okay but as always im terrified that it wont#anyway im in a bit of a reading rut. if you hsve any book recs (not a big fan of fantasy. generally like realistic fiction. ya. lgbt)#that type of stuff. like jumper. the Miseducation of Cameron Post. message not found. stuff like that#open to recommendations#love yall. i hope you all have more thsn enough money to pay rent
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been having a meltdown the past few days i finally got back in the country but my bag didn't come with me and it contains four months worth of clothes but significantly more importantly every single christmas gift i've bought while abroad and lufthansa has been dicking me around for days. like why did you send my bag to a different state. why has it been there since 2:30pm yesterday. like i'm literally genuinely begging you we have to do christmas a day early bc of my brother's flight home and i have two dinky gifts i fit in my carry on one of which is a gag gift like fuck you guys for real i just want my bag!!!!!!!!!!!
#i've called baggage services 9 times today and talked to someone 4 and every time they say there's gonna be something#and i'm gonna get an email#and then i don't get an email#my bag needs to fly to my original destination but there were FIVE FLIGHTS THAT WAY today!!!! one of which i KNOW it could have fit on#and when i asked if i could get it onto that flight they said if i could i'll get an email#and then my airtag didn't move and i got no email#like what am i supposed to do#i have been looking forward to christmas all year it's my favorite holiday#and my brother's getting old enough that i'm always nervous the next one will be the last one we're all together as the four of us#and it's really been fucking with me like i feel so guilty bc i know my parents feel terrible#and i'm just radiating misery about this and it's bringing everyone a little down#but like i just want my bag!!! fuck!!!! i should have had it three days ago!!!!!!!! why is it so hard!!!!!#IT DIDN'T MOVE ONCE TODAY#first year where i have multiple gifts for everyone and got my shopping done early and they do this to me.
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Rayman Retold Lore: Raymona
When Betilla the fairy created Rayman, Ly the fairy wanted to dip her toes into trying this magical process herself. She did not expect to get it on the first try. From this ritual, a lady thingamagig was born, and Ly adopted her and became her parental guardian as Betilla was for Rayman. Ly would name her Raymona, and became her mentor as well.
Raymona was born within the Glade of Dreams, and she was a curious child with a wild imagination. Always finding fun in every little thing, including her lessons. Ly realized that her creation’s strength differed in comparison to Rayman’s. She was weaker when it came to physical strength, but Ly could detect a glimmer within her being. Raymona began an education in the skill of fay magics, as well as the creation of Lums. She was a student that would strive in her lessons, and a very fast learner.
One day, Ly and Betilla planned to introduce the two ray children. Betilla loved the idea of Rayman making a new friend, and agreed with Ly that Raymona may make a good ally to him in the future. Ly arranged to spend half the year in Betilla’s homeland. The young Rayman was introduced to Ly and Raymona. Rayman gleefully welcomed his new friend and gave her a tour of his homeland. The two were considered inseparable. From learning musical instruments in Band Land, to picking flowers for their guardians in The Dream Forest, the two would do everything together. All the way until it was time for Ly and Raymona to return to the Glade of Dreams.
Rayman and Raymona were heartbroken. The two children begged their guardians to let Raymona stay. Betilla and Ly gave the two a method to keep in contact. They became pen pals and would write letters to each other all the time. Rayman would write to Raymona about how his life was going, and Raymona did the same. Through these letters, Rayman learned that Raymona was going to attend the same Academy that his father figure, The Magician, had attended with his cousin. Rayman sent Raymona a card and a flower from the forest when she graduated from the Academy.
After Mr. Dark’s defeat and the Great Protoon was recovered, Betilla decided to take the artifact to the Fairy Council located within the Glade of Dreams, which was on an entirely different continent and was a much different atmosphere than what Rayman was used to. Rayman traveled with her, and the great protoon was placed within the artifact vaults. Once their task was done, Betilla decided to stay in the glade to safeguard the protoon while The Magician kept an eye on things back home. Ly welcomed Rayman and Betilla to the glade and helped them get adjusted to their new lives in the glade.
Rayman would later be introduced to Globox, his wife Uglette, and their children. They offered Rayman a place to stay until he was able to acquire his new house. As Rayman was getting moved into his house, he received a surprise visit from Raymona. Rayman’s excitement bubbled over, and he greeted his old friend in excitement. Raymona helped Rayman move into his home, and they began to exchange stories with each other. Their friendship continued from where they left off. Raymona would introduce Rayman to one of her close friends, Murfy the greenbottle.
Rayman and Raymona have been through a lot together, even facing the invasion of the Robot Pirates within their homeland, which left him with a bit of trauma. Rayman becoming uncomfortable in cramped spaces or cells, as well as suffering occasional nightmares about the event to this day. Raymona being a source of comfort and support to him during these moments. Their bond would be strengthened, and the two started dating. He even gifted her the red neckerchief he wore in the past and she wears it to this day. When Rayman is not palling around with Globox or Murfy, he’s often seen in the company of Raymona on his various adventures through the glade, with her becoming a well-coordinated member of Rayman’s team roster.
Raymona would aid the team through healing via the creation of red lums, use of fairy powers like levitation, or magic bullet projectiles as her form of combat. Being a bit of a bookworm, she will offer aid as well in the form of research. When anyone needs information on something, she will start searching for it through books, or within the fairy council’s library. Raymona developed a quirk where she tries to offer friendship to a few of the villains Rayman has faced over the years. He supports her doing this, but it’s not easy on him.
#Rayman#Rayman Retold#Rayman Fan Character#Raymona#Back in the day I was nervous about the idea of showing off my Rayman Love Interest to the public#Now I'm a lot more comfortable with sharing how these two click#I'm quite a sucker for shipping in many of my fandom interests#Mona's gone over a bit of an overall personality change#She used to be always sassy and quick to rebuke#But I've softened her up#She still engages in quite a bit of tomfoolery#Especially with Murfy who is the same sassy doofus he was in Rayman 3#The Magician mentioned here is the one from Rayman 1#Not the Teensie. The Teensie is Ales Mansay#In the old lore Rayman really didn't like Raymona as a kid at first.#It kind of felt out of character to me#So that was changed as well.
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You know as a kid, there was such a unique thrill in finding fandom spaces. As far as I was aware, my brother and I were the only people who had ever played the Devil May Cry games or watched the anime.
Imagine my disappointment when I discovered FanFic.net and tried to roleplay with the people in the community during the early 2010s.
#Easily the worst fandom experience I've had. Especially on the roleplay side of things.#Lot of people who saw my 13 year old ass as a threat to their ships? Even tho I never spoke to them.#But these people HATED my OC so much because she was Dante's kid. You know. Because I was a child who adored Dante?#AND I WAS CLEARLY A CHILD TOO. I WAS ALWAYS TRANSPARENT ABOUT IT.#In my rules and bio I'd tell people I was a minor. Posting about ''Guys my first day of high school I'm nervous 🥺''.#I'd be minding my own little business and I'd look at mutual's mutuals blog rules:#''GRRRR BARK BARK BARK. I WON'T ROLEPLAY WITH OCS WHO XYZ (obviously directed at me)''#See I look back on it and can take the piss (I was as annoying as you'd think) but holy fuck did that alter my brain for the worse.#A young me seeing 20-35+ year old acting nuts over fiction and children being children.#That's why when I see ''I miss the old RPC. People were nicer.'' shit I roll my eyes so hard. People were not nicer.#I was getting rape and death threats from these fucking animals because they felt a weird way about my OC.#zombert.txt#Sorry for the novel in the tags. I just went on a lil tangent.
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I have spent too much brain power today on having an existential crisis about writing (again). partially that I'm exhausting a topic no one cares to discuss/a topic that has been exhausted and beaten to death (perhaps, but I don't mind when other people do that thing). also that I'm trying to allow myself to write small things with the micro prompts but then it's hard to convey what I want in few words. and then of course that I don't have the skill to convey what I want
#I am a nervous wreck today - first day back to the office#the only thing holding me together was a comm sketch (ty saif if you're seeing this - you held my brain together without knowing)#I am working on some other things in therapy and it's going well but I wish I could work on this faster#I wanna write! I wanna share! If I could bounce OC ideas off of other people I could make a lot of progress#but I'm so scared; I'm so anxious; I'm terrified people will hate me for something I say#yknow in hindsight it's funny that I was always like 'I didn't have a traumatic childhood'#as I sit here now and write a bullshit rambling post about how I can't write anything because I'm scared of people#viper pls
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went to the movies with the acquaintance today
#and our other friend but he's not relevant#he is dating my cousin#anyways#he has such a vibe that's like#a boy you had a crush on when you were 14#like hot in a douchey way#like he would burp in your face#crushes gatorade and smokes weed#but he's kind of an earnest sweetie pie#but i don't know#yeah anyway he is sexy#honestly this is all because he got a serious girlfriend in between my first meeting him and now#in a way that being capable of having a long-term gf makes a man dateable#and last year we were at coachella and he wore this pakistan soccer jersey#and that really did a lot for me#I've always thought he was cute because he is but i was like hmmmm....... is acquaintance extremely sexy??#but I put those thoughts away bc he had a gf at the time#I fear I will fixate on this because I'm expending so much effort writing about it#i don't really think that I need to obsess over him#it's not like I'm going to date him#but I'm honestly so shocked by how attracted I am to him now#it has never been like this before#I think he's less nervous around me now#I think from interacting with my cousin so much (my cousin who is dating his friend)#people who know her through me or me through her do this thing where they ascribe the things they feel about her to me because we look alik#so i think he's looser around me these days#idk he doesn't seem like a nervous person in general#he's putting out this confidence that makes it really really hard for me to not flirt with him#I've been told I'm a natural flirt#I honestly had to do my best to tone it down in front of our friend
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George Russel | 2024 Hungarian GP | via the Hungaroring insta 07/20/2024
#george russell#autumn posts#some kinda quick dramatic edits while waiting for the race!!!!#I'm nervous!!#so many thoughts#so glad Checo and Yuki are okay my heart hurts for them so much#and lots of dissapointments for some of my fave drivers#but Daniel in Q1!!!!! I gasped when he got that top spot!!!!#I was so happy for him#ahhhhh I'm not a McL fan even tho Lando and Oscar seem sweet#love Oscar's humor so much#him getting his first win would be delightful tho but I'm rooting for my faves#Carlos Max and Lewis sending my cheers from Texas!!!! ❤️🔥#and hoping for no tough spots for Charles and George#and the best for Daniel 🔥🔥 him in Red Bull with Max would be so cool 🥺❤️#ahhh I'm such a new fan#but the teams and crews are putting so much work into the cars#but then to hear there is a disconnect like Lewis saying there is a balance issue ahhh frustrating for him#and Max's frustration feeling they don't have the pace......#I'll still believe!!!! it's never over until it's over 💪#I love sports and rooting for teams not because they always win but because I always want them to win!!! even in the hard times!!!!!!!#ahhh what do I know it's only my uhh fifth race?#and I just love to yammer haha nothing important happening down here#sending everyone good energy for a great day a safe and good race and a restful Sunday afterwards!!! ❤️☀️🔥✨
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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH.
#i sent the first chapter off to alice#i hope she doesn't hate it#it's basically her belated birthday present#but i had the idea for a day before she claimed it as a gift#but i'm still super nervous like i always am#fic: brand new colony#writing shit#assholes who are friends
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Babysitter - Part 1
Pairing: dad!Toji x babysitter!reader
Rating: Explicit – MINORS DO NOT INTERACT
Word Count: ~1.7k
cw: age gap (reader is 21, Toji is in his 30s), language, cheating, smut – PIV sex (doggy style), breeding kink, daddy kink
Summary: You're hired to babysit little Megumi for the summer, but you end up taking care of his father, Toji, as well.
Author’s Notes: This is repost from my old blog! I initially got this as a request and it became my first Toji fic ever, and certainly not my last lol. I'm posting this again because I actually wrote a Part 2, check it out! Thanks for reading! Divider credit to @/fic-dumpster.
You stand in front of a quaint house, checking your watch for the time. It’s been almost ten minutes now since you knocked, no answer. You gave the number from the listing a call, still nothing. Rolling your eyes, you take a seat on the steps leading to the door, waiting.
It’s the summer before you head back to university for your senior year. In an attempt to make some extra cash, you took a job as a babysitter through local ads in the paper. The first two clients were completely normal; this one is already leaving a bad taste in your mouth.
Fifteen minutes have passed. You try once more, pounding on the door with your fist as loud as you can. Heel turned, ready to leave, it suddenly swings open, revealing a muscular man with black hair, glaring at you. “What the fuck do you want?”
You step back, startled by his intimidating presence. Stuttering, you answer, “I’m the babysitter.”
He continues to stare at you, eyes following your body up and down, studying it. “Babysitter?”
Before you can explain any further, you hear a car rolling into the driveway. A woman in professional attire steps out quickly. “I’m so sorry I’m late!” She rushes towards you, holding her hand out to shake yours. “We spoke on the phone. I got stuck in traffic, I’m so sorry.”
You smile at her. “It’s okay.”
She faces the man, expression switching from cheery to dreary in an instant. “Toji, where is Megumi?”
He scratches his head. “Huh?”
“Megumi. Our child.”
He sighs. “Right. Uh, I’ll go get him.”
While he’s gone, the woman pulls you aside, speaking in a hushed voice. “That’s Toji, my husband and Megumi’s father. Unfortunately, he’s a complete deadbeat. That’s why I want to hire you. I started my new job and I need someone to take care of Megumi while I’m gone during the day.”
She swallows hard, blinking to fight off oncoming tears. “I have no one. I’ve been shunned by my family, my husband doesn’t give a shit about ours, and I’m all alone trying to give Megumi a good life. I know this is a lot to ask, but I’m desperate. This is just until I can save enough money to hire a full-time nanny.”
She grips onto your wrist with both her hands, begging for help. Truthfully, it’s a lot to unravel, more drama than you anticipated. But the anguish in her eyes tugs at your heartstrings. Plus, knowing it’s temporary doesn’t make it seem so difficult. How bad can it be? “Okay. I’ll do it.”
Relief washes over her. “Oh thank god. Thank you. Thank you. Let’s go inside and I can give you a tour.” She leads you through the entrance, removing her shoes as you follow her. “Oh, and one more thing.”
“Sure.”
“Toji is home most of the day, but he’s always couped up in his room, doing god knows what. Just leave a meal or two outside his door twice a day. That should be enough.”
“Huh?!”
She glances at you with a nervous smile on her face. “Yeah. I told you, he’s good for nothing.”
You don’t respond while you maneuver through the house, barely paying attention while she shows you around. It almost sounds like you’ll be babysitting two children…
~~~
The first two weeks of your new job go by smoothly. Megumi is an adorable baby; he’s almost two-years-old with hair as black as his father’s. While he never really smiles, he doesn’t cry either, expression usually stern, unless he needs a diaper change. He’s self-sufficient, always immersed by his own toys until it’s time to eat. Overall, he’s easy.
Toji, on the other hand, is another story.
You follow his wife’s instructions, leaving two meals outside his door, breakfast and lunch. And this asshole has the audacity to critique it! The bread wasn’t toasted enough. The eggs were too runny. There wasn’t enough seasoning on the meat. All this criticism while each plate is licked clean, not a crumb to spot. He’s never even uttered a simple thank you.
But what he lacks in social skills or personality, he makes up for in his physique. In between meals, he works out in the living room lifting weights, doing push-ups, sit-ups, and pull-ups at the frame of the door. It lasts for over an hour, and by the end of it, he’s shirtless, dripping with sweat. You’ve done everything in your power to avoid staring but it doesn’t prevent your mind from conjuring all types of lewd thoughts about him. You’re ashamed to admit that he is physically attractive, only because everything else about him is utter trash. Still, it doesn’t hurt to look, right?
On the third week, there’s a shift in energy between you two. When he isn’t working out or going out to meet with his sketchy friends, he’s usually couped up in his bedroom, ignoring you and Megumi. This morning, he actually joins you in the kitchen. You stare blankly at him, stunned by his sudden appearance. Megumi is unfazed by his father as he tries to pull your wrist towards him to get a spoonful of mushed up peas.
When he catches you, Toji glares. “What?”
“Um, nothing. Just surprised to see you here.” You clear your throat, focusing back on the baby.
He rolls his eyes. “This is my house. I can do whatever I want.”
“Yes, of course. Sir.”
For some reason, this triggers him. He stands up abruptly, stepping to you, leaning his face towards yours. The scar on the corner of his lip twitches when he gives you a wicked grin. “That’s right. I’m in charge here.”
You flinch from him, scared, maybe even slightly aroused. He’s intense, that’s for sure. But part of you finds it exhilarating to be in his presence.
Megumi whines for more food, to which Toji grabs the utensil from your hands to start feeding him. “Damn kid, he’s hungry all the fucking time.”
You sit up in your seat, regaining your composure. “You shouldn’t curse in front of children.”
He faces you, chuckling. “Curse? Seriously? What are you, five?”
You cross your arms, answering, “I’m twenty-one.”
“Interesting.” There’s that naughty smirk again, as if he’s thinking something obscene in that twisted head of his. And while you should be turned off, you’re not. You squeeze your legs together, pussy throbbing between your thighs. And of course, he notices this. He must, because he leans forward, lips grazing your ear, whispering, “Come by my room whenever Megumi is taking his nap. That’s an order.”
~~~
This is bad. Very, very bad.
You're supposed to be better than this. Clearly, you aren’t, because you’re currently getting railed by your employer’s husband while his child sleeps peacefully in the next room.
“Fuck, this pussy is tight,” he groans, pumping his thick cock in and out of you. You’re bent over the edge of the bed, his hips smacking against your ass as he thrusts into you. He’s got a tight grip on your hips, nails digging into your flesh, pounding away at your greedy pussy, absolutely drenched with arousal and lube. Your face is sticky with perspiration, pillow soaked with sweat and drool. It’s a fucking mess, but it doesn’t matter, because all you can think about is Toji fucking you until you’re seeing stars. Until your head is empty and nothing but his fat cock is occupying your thoughts.
“God, you’re squeezing me so fucking hard, princess. You gonna come again?”
You nod erratically, reaching your fingers to your clit. He smacks it away, doing it himself, his thumb flicking against your swollen bud. “Fucking come on my cock then. Make it nice and creamy for me, got it?”
His cock is buried deep inside you, hitting your sweet spot over and over until you unravel, gushing around him once more. You’ve lost count on how many orgasms you’ve had in this short amount of time.
After your climax, he doesn’t pull out, fucking you even rougher. Your body is pliant around him, yielding to his every touch like putty. You’ve lost control of yourself, completely enraptured in the intense pleasure he surrounds you with.
He leans forward, chest pressed to your back, lips brushed to your ear. “I’m gonna knock you up. Give Megumi a little brother or sister. Would you like that?” He’s crazy. Completely unhinged. Absolutely fucking psycho.
“Fuck yes, I want that,” you moan. “Give it to me, daddy. Breed me.”
And apparently, so are you.
“Oh fuck yeah, take my fucking cum then,” he growls. The bed creaks violently below you, his backshots brutal and frantic now, cock desperate for release. “I’m gonna get you fucking pregnant. Make you mine.”
He shoots his hot load inside you, stuffing you full of his cum. He doesn’t stop until he’s fucked it deeper into your pussy, watching with that sexy look on his face as his creamy cum leaks out of your slit.
Lifting you up to lay comfortably on the bed, he rolls beside you, kissing you sloppily until Megumi’s whimpers blare through the baby monitor, indicating that he’s awake. Toji laughs, smacking your ass as you crawl over him to return to your real job.
~~~
You spend the remainder of your summer employed at the Fushiguro household until you have to go back to school. You and Toji continue to fuck each other silly every day that you’re working.
The day before you leave for college, you say your goodbyes to the family. Megumi’s mom, who remains blissfully unaware of your sins, hugs you tightly. “Thank you so much for all your help. I’ve finally saved enough money to afford a full-time nanny, so we’ll be fine.”
“It was my pleasure. I had a lot of fun. With Megumi,” you clarify, avoiding Toji’s gaze as he watches from the kitchen.
“Seriously. You’re a good person. I hope you know that.” She smiles, truly grateful. “And thank you for taking care of my good for nothing husband too.”
As the guilt of this dirty, filthy secret eats away at you, Toji stares at you from across the room, smirking.
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