#i'm actually so proud of how it turned out!

[girl-lostconnection]

I'm so sorry you have to deal with people being so demanding, and I hope that they actually listen to your post and stop, cause it's just really rude in general.

On the other hand, I, for some reason, keep thinking about your story of reader dying and the 141 grieving and how, for me personally, when it comes to one of my loved ones, no matter how much time passes, I just can't stop thinking about them, craving their love, the way that they loved, and how you can see the similarities in others but it isn't quite right, it still doesn't feel the same, and you're just never left satisfied when you want their love again and no one else can do that, because it's not them. You're still loved, yes, but it's not the same.

Idk. I just was thinking about that and was wondering if that's what they might feel. They still have each other and love each other, but I wonder if there are times when they want or feel like they need it to be like reader's way to feel better on some days, where little things that upset them were originally made better by something reader did, but now that they're gone they're just left with that feeling to simmer.

You know one of the things I had to learn while dealing with grief — it doesn’t become smaller. You just get bigger, you get more experiences the older you get and all of that grief is still there. But grief is just what is left of your love for the person who is no longer there.

I think for them it would manifest differently but I can definitely see Johnny trying his best to keep going because he knows he has three more partners and they have to keep going and they have to keep living. Because Reader wouldn’t be happy with them just ending it all, because there is so much more time left, so many things they haven’t done. I think for him it would be one of the things that would eventually result in early retirement. He already lost a quarter of his heart when he lost Reader, he doesn’t want it happening again. And as much as he loves being demolitions expert, he knows there is a different type of life out there. One that can give him and his partners stability and safety.

I think Johnny would be the person that despite it all still sometimes talks about Reader like they are still there. He mentions references to movies and music and books, he draws them in his sketchbooks, he mentions that “this is the dessert they always wanted to try”. With time it turns into a warm kind of nostalgia, the love that he carries with him, his grief manifesting in trying to compensate for everything Reader wouldn’t experience by living through it himself. And by living on. When his time comes he hopes to see Reader again and say “see? I did well, didnae i? It was a good life. A long life, like you wanted. Bet you are proud of me”

Like i mentioned before Kyle took it in one of the worst hits, he’d keep holding onto Reader’s clothes and mementos as long as he can. He googles obsessively brands of clothes, he finds exactly the same articles because even if these get ruined or good forbid someone throws them out — he will know what to order. It won’t be the same, but he could pretend that it is. He already pretends that he’s alright, he already pretends that the hoodies he’s wearing with Reader’s name and rank are just part of his standard uniform.

I feel like Kyle is a person who has never experienced a loss this big before. He never lost someone who was this close, someone who’s still in his head, someone whose voice he keeps hearing when he talks to himself. Kyle likes to imagine that Reader never passes on. That they are still there, maybe noncorporeal, maybe he can’t see them, but at this point he’d settle for anything.

I think Kyle was never one for religion but whenever he passes church he’d get in to light a candle and say a quick not even a prayer but sort of a wish. Like that’s the only way he can chat with you, like something holy could really pass his “I’m okay, love, I’m eating well. Last mission was shite, but you know how it is. You no longer come to me when i dream. Are you upset, baby? I’m sorry, I’ll be more careful next time, i know you don’t like me getting injured. Just please, come back. I can’t sleep well without you.”

Simon would probably have the hardest times adjusting to the absence of Reader, because he takes the longest time to accept their death. He tries so hard to pull away from the moment where he would need to actually process the notion that it finds him itself and hits him with the force of minivan.

There is aching that he can’t relief, there is itch he can scratch — there is a person who he could tell any of his jokes and who’d not just joke in return but laugh at it and this person is gone. They are not coming back, he can’t even find them somewhere to watch out of the shadows, he can’t stalk them.

Losing people like that is always the hardest because with living people you at least can call/text/send a letter with a carrier pigeon. You can come back and open old wounds, you can pick up the fight, you can look them in the eyes and get some closure. Simon is not getting any. He fights every step of the way, he drags his feet. He’s easily agitated, he feels like hitting his head on the wall every time something stabs him from inside reminding that you are gone.

He comes up with a joke and yeah, of course he can tell it to anyone out of 141, but he wants to tell it to Reader. He wants to tell it to them specifically because they’d have a funny response which they’d choke out of themselves by laughing so hard he actually starts laughing. He misses it. He misses them. He misses their smell, the feel of them, the way he could talk to them and they would just get him so well like no one else would. He doesn’t just lose a partner when Reader dies — he loses a friend.

Price is…Price is complicated. He’s one to bottle it all up and throw it so deep down it may never come up other in his subconscious habits. He makes tea for five people and not four, he shops for five, he still buys the snacks Reader liked, he starts planning celebration for their birthday just on the back of his mind until he catches himself doing it and just forces it all down deeper.

Price would be a high functioning alcoholic in his grief, but still an alcoholic. He drinks a little more than he should, he forces down a drink he’d previously wouldn’t because he knows his limits. But it burns and it numbs and for a few hours he can breathe again. Alcohol allows himself to loosen a lid on everything he feels, it puts safe distance between his feeling and him and he actually allows himself to process some of them.

He cries, he ruins his office, he punches through the wall, he routinely throws up. Once he gets so drunk he actually starts having hallucinations, intoxication so severe he almost chokes on his own vomit. Soap finds him just in time to get him help. After this he gets out on suicide watch for 72 hours and the team would start actually guard him in shifts.

Price still drinks but now next to him there is always someone who also remembers his limits and doesn’t let him overstep them. John hates it at times. He hates himself much more though. He hates Reader sometimes too, because that’s not fair that they are gone. Because look what a fucking mess he is, love, bloody disgrace to drink himself under the fucking table.

Price has the fastest adjustment to Reader staying deceased but at the same time he can’t fully process his grief. Part of him is scared that he will drive himself mad if he does, another part just doesn’t want to. It’s stubborn and unhealthy but so what. He’s a captain, he lost soldiers before, he’s gonna deal with it this way.

But i think he’s also the second person who retires straight after Soap because he finds a new almost obsessively-desperate purpose in keeping his boys alive and well. He may be a fucked up man but his boys already lost one of their own, he doesn’t want to drag them through his death as well

[neeeooon]

(un)official hype squad ;

26 | ice pops

“hi,” you said, pocketing your phone and turning to face rin as you continued walking together. he glanced your way, and you saw the corner of his mouth curve slightly. “hi, y/n.”

as promised, rin took you to his old school, where he and his brother used to play together. he pointed out certain windows, telling you which classes he had and certain memories that made his eyes sparkle. you were perfectly content just walking around the campus, listening to his stories from when he was young until the little field came into view.

you thought rin would be excited to see goals, but he slowed to a stop beside you, his words trailing off. "is this where you practiced?" he gave a curt nod. you took that as a sign to leave and gave rin's hand a gentle nudge. "i'm hungry. know any good places to eat around here?" another nod, though he let out a little sigh this time, and you could tell he was thankful for your interruption.

rin led you to some seafood restaurants in the area that he promised were good, but on the way there, you spotted something else. an ice pop stand. "no way, ice pops!" you cheered as you practically skipped toward the little stand. "can we get some? do you like ice pops?"

“um..”

“oh, little rin!” the owner called, and you both turned in surprise. “it’s been a while! still like the blue pops best?”

rin blinked, taking a moment before quietly nodding and glancing nervously at you. “two?” you smiled. “uh, yeah. two, please.”

the owner shot you a sweet smile and reached for the blue pops. “on the house, kid! how’s soccer going? still playing with your brother?”

you noticed rin swallow hard beside you and cut in with a proud grin. “rin actually won against japan’s u20 team recently! maybe you heard?”

the old man gaped. “that was you, little rin? wow! your big brother must be proud.”

again, rin stayed quiet. you took the pops and thanked the man before casually looping your arm around rin's and steering him away from the stand.

"are you okay?" you asked once you were a safe distance away from the stand, and rin let out a breath. "yeah. sorry." you didn't know why he apologized and told him so before handing him one of the ice pops. "no need to be sorry. come on, show me around before these things melt."

masterlist // previous (ch 25) // next (ch 27)

notes -> okayyy 4 chs left !! ❤️‍🩹

tags -> @enepsigosthelast @svnarxnn @shutuppeter @meekydeeks @tired-child00 @arwawawa2 @5-laska @evilenchantresss @ieathairs @zaephix @x3nafix @nensi @chaoslibra @yukari1k @90s-belladonna @imasimpsowhat06 @tachiibabe @kisses2kanao @kyutiipie @chuurinnie @lukapurin @arcanaloser @kuroshiinya @folksmione @kermitbbg69 @luvynii @irethepotato @poisonedst4r @heididaily104 @ichcocat @laaalaaaloooppppsiiieeeee @kurosagislvr @prettyblueskiess @p1z-d0n7jud6em3 @lilsebnem @bubybubsters @cookielovesbook-akie @idexmids @sugacor3 @ohagiyo @loverryxx @mivqko @unr4v3l @ravenbc @kaz-0e @nevvynev @levihanmyotp @syarc0re @kaikaidenkai @kaidostwin @aldebrana @lonigiri

© neeeooon, 2025

[mimorobo]

Hello! Since I am so sane and normal about this guy, do you think you could draw Fatal Error, perchance?

If you don't know who he is, then a simple Fell will be nice.

Thank you for your time, you're the best :)

Hi!! Yes of course!! I know Fatal Error!! Absolutely horrifyingly tragic story, but he's cool!! It's kinda hard to do the glitch effects, but I'm actually pretty proud of how he turned out here!!

I ended up doing both as well!! Hope you like them Si!!

:D

[tseecka]

I made some books!

For my birthday this year my lovely wife gave me an "off-the-pot" gift; fae know that the biggest obstacle for me in starting new hobbies is moving from the research-and-daydreamkng stage to actually buying the things I need to do the thing.

So she bought me everything I need to start my bookbinding journey, and I finally got around to doing it!

The one on the left is A Taste of Sunshine, my own fic that I wrote earlier this year. It's a quarto Steifbroschuren bind, with a paper covering on the boards and a bookcloth spine. I definitely rushed this one because I was so excited, but I'm happy with how it turned out! I would definitely adjust my covering process next time so that the boards aren't exposed on the edges though.

The one on the right I actually made the typeset for over a year ago. I made it up as I went along, but the finished product is much more "copied a fic into Word and printed it" rather than "typeset". I'm already working on an updated typeset for my second attempt, which will also be the author gift copy (assuming they want one, haha). It's a Bradel bind of "I'll wager my youth against tomorrow" by @hunxi-guilai aka my absolute favourite WangXian fic of all time.

Both were printed in my shitty home inkjet on crappy copy paper, so the quality isn't like. The greatest. But I'm so proud that I made these with my hands! These were definitely a learning experience, but I'm so excited and happy to finally be embarking on my bookbinding journey, this is going to be my whole personality for the rest of forever. Thank you @snefrue my love!

ETA: I still want to do some manner of cover decoration but I don't know what yet so for now they will just be subtle little stealth fics, hehe. I need to go to Michaels for some HTV anyways...yay craft store trip!

[polillamielera]

new icon just dropped ✨

[katsinspats]

I think my copy of the game is broken they've been doing this for 30 minutes

Crop of the Biolizard edit I did bc it makes me laugh:

[wolfram-but-art]

drew one of the memes in this person's post again

reblogs > likes

[starheirxero]

The boys are back in town (to kill you!!)

Still versions under the cut!

Here's V1 Bloodmoon, 👇

And here's V2 Bloodmoon! 👇

[spotaus]

The brothers meet again

Ohhh my gods, this one was so daunting (I don't like backgrounds 😭) but it was so fun!!! This scene is going to be like. The really fun dramatic one when I get around to writing it, but for now here's a piece for it instead!!

Very quick explanation for those who haven't seen my insane rambles: Dream was about to kill Killer (finish him off) when Nightmare bursts out of hiding to get between them!

Now, bonus stuff!

^ He's actually very handsome <3

^Thinner version with a crop I like better??

^ I had to check sizing a few times (but Killer is angled so idk if it really helped?) And I just thought this was REALLY funny

^ Just the twins!

[lemon-lyman]

"I think I can be good at this. I think you might find me valuable."

JANEL MOLONEY as DONNA MOSS The West Wing (1999-2006) ❀ google template, insp. x, x, x, x

[just-posting-kalone]

[f0x-meets-w0lf]

i might post the full drawing of this on here, i think it may be tumblr-safe — but as someone who's already flirting with danger, for now, feel free to hop on over to see it on ao3. promise it's worthwhile <3

[rvstyartstar]

Hey, if there is still an empty space in your 6 cowboys meme draw, I would love to see Lemonade Joe (from the movie Lemonda Joe from 1964) with all of them. He's just so silly and goofy, I think he'd have a great time with the whole gang

The gangs all here The silles!!+ the bisexual cowboys !! :D

[sodidumb]

11/12/2022

OH!!! YOUR TURN TO DIE!!! OH DAMN

I'll be so real, I never played the game myself but I remember invested in the ManlyBadassHero gameplay of it (manly my goat I haven't watched him in a while but I remember binging his content almost all the time. Highly recommend his channel! he plays games, no matter what kind, in a real soothing or calm way it's crazy

A few extras since I have em :0!!

[flowerakatsuka]

af attack for @girlymatsu! — ERINA MY BELOVED!! i'm forever obsessed with her and her royalty au design so i had to draw her in it!!

[essenceofarda]

"Heyy Bo Bo!"

Aka, somewhere in Emyn Arnen,, shenanigans are about to ensue lol

my oc Dottie (nickname pending) (adopted human daughter of Gimli and Legolas) and her BEST best friend, Bo Bo (aka Elboron, the son of Eowyn and Faramir) (Bo Bo doesn't like Dottie's nickname for him) (Bo Bo isn't even sure he likes being Dottie's Best Best Friend all that much) (Every time Dottie gets up to mischief 'Bo Bo' ends up taking all the blame lol 😒)

They're around 9 and 11 here? Maybe? :) (she's roughly 2 years his senior)

From my Gigolas are Dads AU :)