#i'm a taylor fan but this is just so not about her

[harrysfolklore]

carlos sainz being hopelessly in love: a compilation

GIF by sainzprix

summary: carlos sainz can't help but talk about his girlfriend all the time, fans make compilation videos about it

folkie radio: compilation blurbs are back! honestly i have so much fun doing these and i was dying to do it for carlitossss, hope you enjoy!

MASTERLIST | MY PATREON

Carlos Sainz might be known as Formula 1's Smooth Operator, but there's one thing that makes him completely lose his cool: his girlfriend.

While most drivers keep their private lives under wraps, Carlos can't seem to help himself from turning into a lovesick puppy whenever she is mentioned. His teammates often tease him about how his usual composed demeanor melts away at the mere sight of her.

Fan compilations began flooding social media, showing every endearing moment of Carlos being completely smitten. The most popular one, titled "Carlos Sainz Being Hopelessly In Love: A Compilation," gained millions of views across platforms.

The video opens with Carlos walking to the Ferrari garage during media day. "Favorite meal after a race?" the social media guy asks for the team's instagram stories.

"Well, my girlfriend makes this amazing risotto," Carlos grins, adjusting his Ferrari cap, "I used to prefer paella but now… don't tell my mother, but her risotto is unbeatable."

In another clip, Carlos is doing a Ferrari team challenge, asked about his most used emoji.

"The chili emoji," Carlos laughs, "Because that's what I call my girlfriend. My little chili. She's small but spicy."

During a post-race interview after a podium finish: "This one's special because my girlfriend is here today. She couldn't come to many races this season so having her here for a podium means everything."

Another clip shows Carlos arriving at the paddock, his girlfriend walking slightly behind him. A fan calls out asking for a photo, and Carlos immediately reaches back to take her hand, pulling her into the frame with him.

"No no," he says when she tries to step away, "You're part of the photo cariño."

The fans melted, getting the entire interaction on camera.

There's a moment captured by F1TV during a rain delay. Carlos is in the garage, and the camera catches him FaceTiming with his girlfriend who couldn't make it to that race.

"See? It's properly wet," he shows her the track, "But don't worry, I'll be careful. Yes, yes, I promise."

A clip from Ferrari's social media games shows Carlos doing a "Rate or Hate" segment. When shown a picture of breakfast in bed:

"Rate, obviously. My girlfriend makes the best breakfast," he pauses, "Actually, she's going to watch this and know I'm lying. I make breakfast most mornings because she's terrible at waking up early. But she makes great coffee once she's actually awake."

"Mate, don't roast her like that," Charles laughed from beside him.

"She loves me, she doesn't mind." Carlos shrugged

There's footage from a fan in Monaco, catching Carlos and his girl walking their dogs. They don't notice they're being filmed, and Carlos is gesturing animatedly while she laughs, reaching up to wipe something from his face. The natural, unguarded moment became a fan favorite.

During another Ferrari social media video, Carlos is asked about his most played song.

"Oh no," he laughs, "My girlfriend's going to kill me but it's that Taylor Swift song she keeps playing. It's been stuck in my head for weeks. She converted me into a Swiftie, I can't believe it."

A paddock moment caught on camera shows her helping Carlos with his sunscreen before a hot race.

"I burn easily!" Carlos defends when Charles teases him, "She's is just taking care of me. Unlike some teammates…"

During a radio interview, Carlos is asked about living in Monaco.

"The best part is having my girlfriend there," he says, "She's made our house a home. Though she insists on having plants everywhere. I think we have about fifty now? She names them all too."

A casual moment caught by Sky Sports shows Carlos talking to his trainer between sessions. His girlfriend appears with his water bottle, and without interrupting his conversation, Carlos automatically lifts his arm so she can fit against his side.

During a Ferrari team challenge about "Who knows Carlos better?", Charles vs his girlfriend:

"His biggest fear?" the interviewer asks.

"Spiders," she answers immediately.

"That was supposed to be a secret!" Carlos protests.

"Mi amor, everyone knows since you made me catch that spider in the motorhome while you stood on a chair."

There's a sweet moment from Carlos' birthday celebration at a race weekend. The Ferrari team surprises him with a cake, and the camera catches his girlfriend helping him blow out the candles.

"What did you wish for?" someone asks.

"I already have everything I need," Carlos responds, his arm around her.

The compilation includes a clip where Carlos is doing simulator work, completely focused, until his girlfriend brings him coffee. Without taking his eyes off the screen, he reaches for her hand and kisses it in thanks.

One of the most shared clips shows Carlos after a difficult race where he DNF'd. He's clearly frustrated in the garage, but the camera catches his girlfriend quietly approaching him. She doesn't say anything, just takes his hand, and you can see his shoulders immediately relax.

The final clip shows Carlos at a racing podcast, responding to a question about handling public attention as a couple.

"We try to keep things private, but it's natural to want to share your happiness sometimes. She understands this world, she supports me unconditionally, and that makes everything easier. Though she does make fun of me when I take too long choosing my race day outfit."

The compilation ends with text reading: "Find someone who's hopelessly in love with you as Carlos is with his girlfriend."

[parkerloves]

THE SWIFT THEOREM || JMM21 x Teammate!GN!Reader

paring: pepe marti x teammate!gn!reader

type: fluff

request?: yess based on this one

summary: Campos decides to test if his two Formula 2 drivers are able to distinguish between Taylor Swift and Shakespeare and after seeing the horrible knowledge that your teammate has about your favorite singer you decide to take him to one of her concerts to educate him a little bit

word count: 1.3 K

fc; n/a

warnings: bullying towards pepe because he doesn't what he's saying, some spanish and nickname, it turns romantic after y/n post

[masterlist]

Campos had not long ago decided to join the small trend of putting their drivers to do different challenges so that the fans could see more of them even outside the track.

That day it was you and Pepe's turn, you two arrived at the filming set talking casually and without having any idea about what you were going to have to do that day, so after taking over the large chair in the room, you looked at the camera.

“So what are we doing today?” you asked as Pepe sat down on the chair next to you after bringing it close enough for his knee to gently bump into you. 

“You're going to have to guess whether these quotes we're giving you are from a Taylor Swift song or a Shakespeare play” Your pr manager explained, laughing softly as she saw your excitement at the mention on behalf of the British singer. 

“That's not fair! Y/n is like Taylor's biggest fan!”

“Say it right, it's called being a swiftie” You corrected him simply to annoy him, causing him to stick his tongue out at you like a little kid to which you did the same laughing.

It didn't take long for the crew to nag you to get serious and start shooting the video, but they had gotten themselves into it by getting you to shoot together, after all you had been inseparable since the beginning of the season.

When they finally got you to focus on the day's task, they gave you a few seconds before letting you know you could talk.

“Hi guys, welcome to a new Youtube video! I'm Y/n Y/l/n” You introduced yourself as you did every time it was your turn to record.

“And I'm Pepe Marti” The boy followed you almost immediately. "And today we're going to play Shakespeare or Taylor Swift” He said, holding up the small papers he had in his hand.

“Basically in these cards there are some lyrics or words and we have to guess if it’s from Taylor o Shakespeare”

“I think it's going to be quite easy” Pepe said, reading the first card to himself “So first one... Give me no compasses, gave me no signs.”

You quickly identified that it was from a Taylor song, but let your partner give his opinion first.

“So any guesses?” 

“It sounds old, especially the word compasses... So Shakespeare?” he guessed tilting his head to the side before looking to know your verdict.

“Nope, that's from invisible string, definitely.”

Pepe just nodded slowly as he always did when he really didn't understand what you were saying.

“It's from the album Folklore” You tried to explain although you knew from his face that he still didn't know what you were talking about '“Let's go with the next one” You took the next piece of paper from him reading it out loud “They say she was seen on occasion, Pacing the rocks, staring out at the midnight sea” You looked at him waiting for his opinion on this lyrics

“Okay now that has to be shakespeare, it's way too long to be a line of a song” He stated with his own deduction, though seeing your frown he quickly changed his mind “I mean is definitely Taylor”

“So as you can see they're making me work with a cheater” You said looking at the camera after giving him a little whack on the head with the papers.

“sush you love me” He blew you a kiss to which you rolled your eyes as he took the next sentence out of your hands '“Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind” He read again, and very slowly, as if that would help him understand the phrase better “love equals Taylor, definitely”.

“Nah that's Shakespeare, I don't recognize that”

“This doesn't make sense like at all” He wrinkled his nose looking at the other one of paper, tossing it aside

“Stop crying come on” You pushed him gently laughing before reading the next “I do love nothing in the world so well as you.”

“If that's not Shakespeare i'm quitting”

“As far as i now...” You spoke to give a little mystery to the subject “That's correct?” You said looking at the people behind the camera, and when they confirmed yes you couldn't help laughing at Pepe's celebration.

“Now i'm on fire, give me the next one” Pepe took the rest of the papers from you.

“You just got one ri-”

“Shhh” He covered your mouth before clearing his throat so he could continue with the video ‘Everyone we know understands why it's meant to be’ He decided to play it cool and pretend to think about it ‘This is my friend Shakespeare again’ He said a little too confidently 

“Pretty sure that's Tortured Poets Department”

“Wasn't that film called Dead Poets algo?” You had no choice but to judge him with your eyes before you scolded him.

“You're talking about something else, what i told you is one of Taylor's albums” You denied to which Pepe gave you a little sneer before you threatened him with your eyes.

“ Okay sorry sorry, don't kill me” He laughed raising both hands.

“Next one,Though she be but little, she is fierce.” You read out loud looking at him for him to answer first as usual.

“Really? I thought i had it, god sake” He jerked back in the most dramatic way possible making you laugh once again.

“That gives me Taylor vibes, the fierce part at least.”

“I don't remember that song”

You threw the next piece of paper in his face to get him to concentrate again on what you were doing.

“Free of women with madness, their men and bad habits” He recited still lying down and as he slowly sat up ”Yeah this is not coming from a man in th s. xix”

For that comment it didn't take long for him to be scolded while you laughed at his screw up next to him, knowing that clip wouldn't make it into the video.

“I mean” He cleared his throat as you went back to recording ”That sounds like Shakespeare because…” He got a menacing look from his manager again “I say so”

“Wow, two out of seven” You said with a little chuckle ”You completely suck"

You took the last part so you could finish the video at once.

“And finally” You did a drum roll on your teammate's leg which besides giving you the opportunity to beat him up for the barbarities he had said throughout the video ”The course of true love never did run smooth.”

“Please tell me that's Taylor”

“Sorry darling, wrong again” You laughed softly before looking at the camera in case you had gotten confused, but confirming that you hadn't, you proceeded to say goodbye ”Well here ends this constant stab for me, because i thought i had taught him better”

“I wasn't that bad”

“Yeah it was, but don't worry people, i'll teach him properly”

A few days passed since the publication of that video, and the joke was still quite present between the two of you, and especially among your fans, so your new publication during the summer break, despite catching you by surprise, was very welcome.

yourusername has posted!

liked by pepemartiofficial, yourbff and 10,754,475

yourusername: he's learing the hard way now

tagged: pepemartiofficial

pepemartioffical: dios, thanks for making her not let this go

user1: WE NEEDED THIS, SHUT UPP user2: my fav duo stoppp user3: i just love themmm

camposracing: love seeing more pepy/n content!!

user4: same here admin, same here

yourbff: just kiss already

user5: listen to themm!!!

Pepe as soon as he saw you with the phone he took it out of your hands, after all he was there for you, and to avoid you to start complaining, he silenced anything you could say kissing you, which used to be his secret weapon, the problem is that you still could not say that you were together, so he had to endure all your criticism in his direction, although it was not so bad to see how you laughed at his expense if he could see you happy.

"will you stop bullying me?"

"maybe" you chuckled against his lips "don't think so tho"

[killjoygem]

Someone was very unhappy about me saying there's no such thing as an ethical billionaire 🤭

[parkitaco]

absolutely hate it when an artist i dislike for being mid makes a banger. like ok ur album sucks but ur gonna be my top artist next year because of this one stupid song. i think you're lame on principle but unfortunately you're a talented actor. what is wrong with you why would u do this to me and my intellectual takes Good Bye

[cairavende]

Worm Arc 24 thoughts:

. . . fucking . . . fuck. Just . . . fuck. Fucking fucky fucking FUCK, THAT WAS SO BADASS!!!!!

ALL OF IT HOLY SHIT I DON'T CARE, JUST PICK ANY MOMENT!! EVERYTHING EVERYONE DID WAS BADASS!

LIKE. FUCK. COLIN GOT TO LOOK BADASS.

He even got "yelling in caps" badass. Just for the one scene when he picked up Chevy. He did one fucking thing right, which was help someone up and then let THEM be cool.

And speaking of . . . HOLY FUCKING SHIT CHEVY! YOU DIDN'T GET KILLED BY TIME TRAVEL CHAD!

WHICH MEANS I DON'T HATE YOU ANYMORE!

WHICH MEANS I CAN SHOUT ABOUT HOW BADASS THAT WAS!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fuck waiting for my interlude section to talk about this. That final scene with Behemoth was one of the most visually badass things I have ever read in my life! Fuck. I get fucking chills just thinking about it.

I can see that entire last fight in my head very clearly, almost like remembering an anime scene. Perfectly written.

And Regent! Look at you go, that's character growth!

I mean sure, you died. But growth!

Besides, you dying legit made Imp cooler. She was already great but "I'm going to fucking kill his dad for him" is even better! And Wanton's apparently got jokes so we still have a funny guy.

Basically if someone had to die I'm happy it was you. Sorry not sorry.

ALSO FOIL WHAT THE FUCK YOUR POWER COULD ALWAYS DO THAT AND YOU'VE JUST BEEN SITTING THERE SHOOTING THINGS?

I . . . I just . . . girl! How?? You could literally have turned a piece of rebar into a sword that Alexandria could have cut Leviathan in half with! And that's just what I thought of in the first few seconds after seeing this! Spend some time actually thinking about what you can do lady!

But luckily my daughter is here to do the thinking, and be FUCKING AMAZING AT IT!!!

LIKE HOLY SHIT TAYLOR, YOU CUT OFF BEHEMOTH'S LEG!

AND THAT PLAN HOLY SHIT! YOU MADE A PLAN THAT SET RACHEL UP TO BE THE BADASS HERO WHO CUTS OFF BEHEMOTH'S LEG, AND SETUP REALLY POWERFUL HEROES AS HER SUPPORT!

Fuck half of Eidolon's fucking job was "Catch my girlfriend and fly her back to me."

GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WOLFSPIDER WOLFSPIDER WOLFSPIDER!!!!!!

And the snuggling at the end, as they were leaving!! EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh my god and the lightning rod! That was insane!

Golem just has really cool powers. Glad Theo is doing ok.

And Alexandria's power preserves the body so Pretender can just puppet her. That's wild. Kinda annoying, my daughter just killed her!

And and and Taylor talked with Contessa!

AND CONTESSA SHARED HER POWER!!!

I was pretty close, didn't have it that specific, but basically was expecting something similar. Fuuuuck it's so cool!

Also the underground cities and the secret capes were wild. Kinda unfortunate that you guys set things up for Behemoth to be able to collapse the entire city, gave him lots of existing tunnels and such to work with.

My daughter could have done a little less bonding with Phir Sē. Ideally. Would have made me feel a little better.

But holy shit a time portal bomb made of looped light?? GOD DAMN. That sure hit like a truck. Just not a big enough truck.

Also Grace and Cuff are dating. I don't make the rules I just enforce them.

And the rules are "make it gay"

God and the whole "thinkers stuck on a roof" bit. Christ that was planned badly. They almost died because nobody had some rope. Embarrassing.

I'm glad Tattletale is doing ok. She got her girlfriend to steal a dudes phone for her, which was pretty funny. And I loved how she still got to do her big reveal to Chevy, she needs that.

HOLY SHIT AND TAYLOR TELLING RACHEL HOW TO TAKE CARE OF IMP?? SHE UNDERSTANDS HER GIRLFRIEND. GAY GAY GAY GAY GAY GAAAAAAYYY!

And fuckin Tecton just trying so hard to do the same thing with Rachel first and just failing so completely. And then trying again. And again. Bless his big himbo heart he's trying.

Fuck there's so much, I'm sure I'm missing a dozen other things. Every chapter had 20 moments I could mention.

Seriously though, sucks for New Delhi. "There’s nothing left to protect here" is a heck of a line and it is not what anyone wants to hear.

Chevy interlude (the rest of it) thoughts:

Holy shit Chevy's shadows! I wish he had described more of them, I wanted to know everyone's image! Just so much data there.

Fun to see the early Wards. Fun to see that Colin was always like that.

Hero's death was absolutely a targeted hit, he started asking too many questions, pushing back on things.

Chevy's whole power is just really fascinating. Really interesting to think about.

RIP Mouse Protector

Also the fact that her shadow was her laughing makes me think she might have lost the ability to be sad when she triggered, which is unfortunate if true. I mean Bonesaw got you either way so I guess it doesn't matter now.

Loved getting a wonderful list of Endbringer attacks. Sure it still wasn't all of them, but up through Simmy showing up is still pretty great.

Extremely curious about Mr. Keene, keeping an eye out for more info on him.

Tattletale just needed this poor man to read her texts and let her do her fucking THING! It's all she wants.

Anyway ya turns out powers (except Scion of course) can't touch the actual core of the Endbringers and I'm like 95% sure I have a good idea as to why it works like that, but still got a little bit of that uncertainty.

Endbringers are directly related to Eidolon in some way, I am pretty sure of that. Created by him. Previous bodies. Sentient poop for all I know! They're connected though.

HOLY SHIT WHEN HE SEES TAYLOR'S SHADOW DURING THE FINAL FIGHT!!!!! AAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!! SHE LOOKED SO BADASS!!!!

Aftermath interlude thoughts:

Pretender and Satyr are so gay. That one's easy I don't even gotta try.

Everyone just starting to freak out about how things are gonna escalate instead of just celebrating the win is really unfortunate.

I mean, they aren't wrong. Another Endbringer is gonna come. But it would be nice if they could live in happy ignorance for a few days.

I'm guessing it'll either be two Endbringers that always attack at the same time or one Endbringer that uses teleportation to swap to a different city after a certain period of time. In either case basically fucking up the organized response ability.

Already mentioned this, but Rachel and Taylor fell asleep on each other!!!! GGGGAAAAAAAYYYYYYY!!!

If Dragon comes back wrong I'm putting all of the blame on Colin.

Fucking Danny just fucked that phone call up so bad. This man can not get it fucking right. FUCK.

GLENN YOU FUCKING FUCK I DON'T CARE WHAT YOUR REASONS ARE YOU DON'T PUT SOMEONES PRIVATE VIDEO THEY TOOK FOR THERAPY ON THE INTERNET!!

AND YOU NEVER EVEN FUCKING SAID "SORRY"!!!!! YOU EXPLAINED YOUR ACTIONS AND WHY YOU HAD TO DO IT EVEN THOUGH IT WOULD HURT HER AND YOU COULDN'T ASK HER CAUSE SHE WOULD HAVE SAID NO BUT YOU NEVER EVEN SAID SORRY!!!

Like for real. Taylor says "You could have asked" and you respond with "You would have said no." Fuck at least just say sorry!

[itspileofgoodthings]

.

[alfhildr-the-word-weaver]

Shoutout to my Monkees mutuals for reminding me about the Monkees and their music; now I'm thinking about how She is such a season 2 Damon talking about Katherine song.

Meanwhile, 1864 Damon is of course firmly Vampire Girl by the Misfits (he would die for her, and he did).

[pardonmydelays]

Why don't you like Taylor Swift anymore?

cause she's a total opposite of everything she used to be

[djarinova]

from an article titled "I’m a Swiftie, but the staggering size of the Eras tour has left me feeling alienated"

girl im not sure you are a swiftie if you're saying the anthology is full of forgettable songs...

[cowboylikedean]

the cynical part of me is exhausted by how much money has been made on the taylor-travis thing and its just hard for any of it to feel real and genuine to me rn

[msjynerso]

.

[thekidsare-not-alright]

I have mistakenly scrolled through the fob tag (usually I am not this disappointed tbh) and I must be missing half the conversation because there are so many posts defending the tswift collab but like... without knowing what potential problems people actually have about it

"the fob fanbase is scared of the tswift fanbase" what "they've been friends for years" who is saying this stuff

[anothermansjeans]

naur bc i have thoughts....

[yamujiburo]

A few months ago, some of you might know if you keep up with this blog, I went to Collect-A-Con LA. It was truly on a whim. Literally the day before my girlfriend and I had just come back from our Europe trip. Normally I'd be so tired and jetlagged but for some reason I was feeling really antsy and energized and just needed to go somewhere and get out of the house.

I found out that Collect-A-Con LA was happening the following day and that a lot of the original Pokemon voice cast would be there. So I bought a ticket, drew/printed up a picture that I wanted to get signed and got up early to drive to the convention center (you have to understand that I hate driving in town and also very much never wake up early). I don't know what possessed me to do this but I'm so glad I did.

I ended up having the privilege of meeting Eric Stuart, Veronica Taylor and of course, Rachael Lillis.

She was masked up, looked tired, and a bit sick. And at the time, I assumed she might've caught a cold over the weekend of the con. I went to her table and she still smiled and gave me all of her attention and time. I paid her assistant for an autograph, gave Rachael the drawing I'd done and she got to signing it. Her assistant said the print I had was cute and asked where I got it. I told her that I drew it myself and that I spent a LOT of my time drawing Team Rocket and other various Pokemon fanart. When I said that, Rachel stopped mid-sign and looked up and squinted at me and asked "are you Kiana Mai"? My heart skipped. I had no idea she knew who I was and was surprised that, given how many Pokemon fanartists there are in the world, she was able to pick me out. I left that interaction so happy and felt so seen. Soon after, I went to get my print signed by Veronica Taylor and while in her line, noticed Rachael had left her table; presumably not feeling well and had to leave the con early. I remember thinking how lucky I was to catch her before she left.

A couple months later, I saw the gofundme that her sister posted, detailing what Rachel was going through for the past few years and her battle with cancer. It put that convention day in such a different perspective for me.

All I could think about was how much she cared about her fans and how in touch with her community she was to go to a convention while being in so much pain and suffering in silence. I obviously don't know her personally, but based on how other fans who've met her, as well as her colleagues have spoken about her, I got the impression that she was an amazing, thoughtful person who cared about the people around her. That was only solidified for me based on this singular interaction a few months ago.

Rest in Peace Rachael Lillis. You've touched so many lives with your voice and so much of us grew up listening you. Thank you for everything!

[autumnrory]

oh my goooood i made a buch of tweets complaining about swifties yesterday and someone followed me who is clearly a taylor hater like disliking swifties and disliking taylor are completely different things most big artists have completely shitty fanbases i'm just more inclined to complain about taylor's bc i'm in it every day but anyway their pinned tweet is responding to someone talking shit about karlie being a zionist (idk that you can actually call her that because people love throwing around that word a lot but whatever) like "oh your is horrible in all these ways but karlie's the problem??" like karlie has actually made pro-israel comments like i have no idea what, if anything she's said in more recent months so mayhaps this person is also pro-israel lol i haven't ventured that far but the tweet they liked was simply me refuting karlie being in the nosebleeds at eras tour and saying she wouldn't have come if she and taylor were really enemies so i guess karlie is the reason they followed me but uh maybe you can't tell my @ is a taylor song but you can clearly see my header is a photo of taylor and niall so. this is not an account for you pal!

[bemusedlybespectacled]

proposing what I'm going to call Gaylor's Razor, which is: never explain normal shit as being part of a secret message that can only be decoded by over-analysis.

"These Taylor Swift lyrics are actually coded messages saying that she's a lesbian and is forced to stay in the closet! Any lyrics that are clearly about being attracted to a man are just to throw us off the scent!" Sometimes people, like Taylor Swift, are straight and write about being straight, because they are straight.

"The fourth series of Sherlock was deliberately bad because it was actually a coded message to us fans that there is a secret fourth episode that will make Johnlock canon and will actually be good!" Sometimes writers (even experienced writers who are normally good at their jobs) will write something that's not good, because no one is perfect. They're not going to waste everyone's time and money and energy creating something terrible on purpose as part of a grand master plan.

"Tessa Virtue and Scott Moir, the Canadian Olympic ice dancers, are secretly married (with kids)! Their public relationships with people who are not each other and them repeatedly saying 'we dated as kids and now we're just friends' are just to hide the truth! Which they need to hide for some reason! Their relationship is obvious just from their physical chemistry when competing! JUST LOOK AT THIS TWO SECOND CLIP OF HIM BLINKING AT HER!" It seems counterproductive to put all that thought into hiding a relationship that doesn't need to be hidden but then also telegraph that same relationship in front of millions of people through planned choreography.

"But BB, what about times that people really are speaking in code or hiding something due to outside influences?"

If it requires huge leaps in logic, like adding all the letters in a sentence together and dividing by seventeen and that number matches the binary sequence for the color yellow so YELLOW MUST BE SIGNIFICANT, it's not a secret code.

If it requires focusing on teeny tiny details but discards huge ones, like analyzing someone's micro-expressions but handwaving away what the person is actually saying out loud with their mouth, or focusing on one specific line instead of the entire scene or song or whatever, it's not a secret code.

If both supporting and contradictory evidence are used to come to the same conclusion (ex: when Taylor says something that I interpret as gay, that means she's gay, and when she says something that I interpret as straight, that still means she's gay and just hiding it), it's not a secret code.

Trying to apply fandom meta analysis techniques to real life is a really good way of fall into conspiratorial thinking that can be easily exploited. You can totally try to predict what's going to happen in a story or choose to interpret a scene in a specific way; you can't do that in real life with real people. That way lies the kind of nonsense that leads to shit like "this image of pizza on a children's toy is actually subliminal messaging by The Cabal™ that proves that Pizzagate is real."