#i'm a horrible horrible person the end
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can't believe we're all adults being forced into the club penguin level of censorship in 2024
#ramble#if you say unalive in front of me i will personally kill you with my hands#you just can't muffle and censor and hold someone's hand through some things#some things are horrible. and they should be spoken aloud and they should upset you. because they are horrible#the second we started kidzbopifying the world was the end of taking anything seriously i think#i'm not even joking i've spoken to people older than me who won't even say the world sex#this isn't the playground you're not going to get in trouble just let us say the word!!!!!!#how am i supposed to listen to you when you won't even say the thing you're supposed to be talking about#yes this is the fault of the platforms with their censorship rules but the fact that we all just go along with it like it's not dystopian#you do know it doesn't stop with cursing right. people are already having to censor queer terms because they get flagged as inappropriate
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ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴍᴇ ᴄʜᴏᴏꜱᴇ ↳ anonymous asked: HUSK and ALASTOR or angel and valentino?
#hazbin hotel#husk#hazbin husk#alastor#hazbin alastor#hazbin hotel edit#hazbin edit#radio demon#requested#make me choose#my gifs#dad beat dad#flashing gif#flickering gif#the full ask said ''in whichever way you define'' at the end so#i chose based off of which dynamic i'm more intrigued by. valentino as a villain and as a challenge to angel is REALLY interesting dont get#me wrong here. it's great. but THESE two have a lot of untapped potential for husk specifically#alastor is just there at the moment but HUSK. husk. it really is a mirror to angel's situation - everything wrong in his afterlife is#because of that gamble. but he WAS an overlord. HE was the one doing that horrible shit before. that's INTERESTING!!#he gathered and gambled away souls like money. it was all just a game to him. now HE'S getting his. a sick poetic justice in a way.#i am SO excited to see if they dive into this more!! will he ever self reflect? if he does will we SEE him doing this reflection? will it#be enough to play a part in him choosing to redeem himself? or even decide if redemption is worth the effort? i feel like there's potential#with his dynamic with alastor to influence that big time + his friendship with angel will also be a major factor#also making this set made me realize the hallway scene is like their one major interaction. jfc and it's fucking HORRIFYING lmao#look i loved their pilot interaction/dynamic as much as the next person but this is just. SO much better. more things to explore.#i'm really glad in the end that they were rewritten in this way. A+
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Thinking of Bruce, who spent his youth playing guitar loudly, super excited to share that with his super cool crime fighting tragic backstory included child.
Only for Dick to say, "Yeah guitar's cool, you know what's even better?" *pulls out an accordion*
Bruce, over the accordion: "Alfred you still have the receipt for this one right?"
#I'm joking Bruce would totally fucking jam out with his child who takes after Weird Al and is fucking killing it on the accordion#DO NOT lose my tags#Someone's gonna be all upset that Bruce wouldn't play music with his kid#And I'll look like a horrible monster who ended the post on that terrible line#But that would be so fucking funny#Dick grayson#Batman#Source: Lego Batman#LMAO JK#Bruce wayne#Shitpost#Fucking tags could include the damn charter of rights I gotta stop#Can't stop#Never gonna give you up#never gonna let you down#;)#batfamily#personal
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post ep 11
#trigun stampede#trigun#meryl stryfe#nicholas d wolfwood#vash the stampede#i cant even elaborate on this episode bc ive spent all day Thinking about it yesterday#and it made me Miserable#i just want to see vash have some autonomy again...#he is a little bit more on the quieter end for stampede as less angry about things but i dont think he's more of a coward in stampede#even though he was transported into his memories and saw and heard those terrible things from the kids and wolfwood#he was able to gather himself and keep going#his resilience has always been the strongest and also saddest thing about him#so it killed me irreversibly when he lost the one person who he could always look back to reliably#the fact knives couldnt even alter anything in rem's dialogue within those memories just stands for how strong her place is in vash's memory#and potentially knives just knows that would be too ooc of her to make in any Universe if she had something horrible.#man. I TALKED ABOUT THIS IN LIKE ALL 3 PLATFORMS. I'm alright with Knives as a character but jesus#- i did it all for you - im so sad that vash had to hear something like that. im so so sad about it#anyway i hope meryl stays safe shes done so much#i love her so much <3#ruporas art
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p sure i said variations of this before but natsume and tanuma's relationship being the lightmode version of darkmode natori and matoba's will never stop being SO bonkers to meeee
it's in your face in so many ways but especially how the difference in their abilities is such a key piece in making tanunatsu grow closer and more honest and vulnerable with each other vs. being the source of ongoing tension between natori and matoba
anyway love that so much of the stuff i used to think was purely in my head ages ago is just becoming flat out text now when will any other canon ever etc etc
#i'm so tired and sleepy and still need to one day articulate the incoherent post in my head that mostly consists of !!!!!!!#bc one of the things that the end of animated miharu did was hurtle me right back to omibashira in such visceral ways#and also world unbent obvs#and it deserves a lot more tact and nuance than i can muster atm#but yes literally she is doing this on purpose and it's to victimize ME PERSONALLY and i couldnt be more thankful :')#natsume problems#horrible exorcists
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Y'know I kind of feel like when Megatron killed Tarn and said 'I want you to spend your final moments thinking of this: that everything you've done has been for nothing' he was kind of self-projecting onto Tarn? Mainly because at Megatron's statue, M and T had a conversation where Tarn explicitly asked if all the Decepticons in service to Megatron died for nothing, if HE did everything he did for nothing. (And I think M even gave an answer along the lines of 'idk I think we basically did'). And then after Megatron killed the DJD and Rodimus teleported in to rescue him, there was that silent moment where Megatron just stared at Rodimus not moving at all before he finally took his hand at the last moment.
It honestly feels to me like for a while, Megatron fully intended to murder-suicide himself. Murder the DJD, his monsters and his creation, and then take himself out alongside them, because he is also a monster. Because he also feels that everything he's ever done has been for nothing.
Goddamn it's no wonder I liked that scene so much LMAO, as someone who thinks villain Megatron > Autobot Megatron, literally one of his key traits is that Megatron basically took his pain/trauma/worldview and used it to lash out at the universe and try to subjugate it to his vision. So the fact that he took his own pain and brutally murdered the DJD while telling them the very same thing that puts him through so much agony is so very deliciously ironic. And a return, however brief, to the Megatron characterization that I know and love.
#squiggposting#i also feel like it turns his asshole behavior towards tarn into something more understandable#like... he is not just condemning tarn and co for being evil useless bastards#as if he has the moral high ground. no. megatron also thinks his whole life was wasted#for a moment he fully intended to kill all of the DJD and then himself. a circle of monsters#who all exist for no good reason and did horrible things for no good reason#only rodimus coming in is what saved megatron both literally and in a spiritual sense#from believing he deserved to just die in the same hellish pit he killed his creations in#THIS IS LIKE SOME FUCKING METAL ASS BIBLICAL SHIT I'M TELLING YOU#tbh if megatron had actually died in there with tarn and the djd i wouldve considered that#a more satisfying end to his story than what we got#particularly bc i think the functionist universe is stupid and LL 25 felt like. contrived#in how it dealt with Megatron's fate#anyways the TLDR is that megatron was an asshole to tarn as if he didnt make him how he was#but like during that one moment i think he was in a pit of self loathing#and he wanted to drag the djd. tarn in particular. along with him for ruining his happiness#i'm sorry but that's who megatron is#if your megatron isn't an intensely angry/damaged person who drags ppl down with him#bc of his own projection and self loathing then like. who is he#enough soft grandpa mtmte megatron i love violent unresolvable self hatred and lashing out megs
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did.. he wear a suit for stan's birthday?
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#i'm prolly like the last person on earth to notice this#south park#butters stotch#stan marsh#if it was mentioned in the episode i wouldnt remember#i don't want to remember#this episode makes me horribly sad and i will be inconsolable for days on end#the irrevocable despair that episode bestows me could make frankenstein weep
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Preparing myself to read a Persona 5 fic because it sounds super interesting but Maruki is a tagged character which means there's like a 70% chance that he's being mischaracterized
#if someone can recommend me fics where this Doesn't Happen i would be so glad#i will still read it either way but it's just a pet peeve#why can't y'all comprehend moral greyness#maruki ISN'T AN EVIL SUPERVILLAIN#HE'S NOT EVEN EVIL#i've written fics btw i'm not trying to sound ungrateful or anything. like i said i will read them#but it's not just with fics like he gets mischaracterized So Much from literally everywhere in the fandom#how did you play through the entirety of persona 5 royal and come to teh conclusion that maruki is an evil man#who manipulated teenagers because he is malicious and horrible#when the story quite literally tells you. that he is NOT an evil horrible person#i'm not gonna deny that he manipulated teenagers into playing into his plan but he is most definitely not evil#nor did he do it with malicious intent. nuance DOES MATTER 😃#persona 5#persona 5 royal#p5#p5r#takuto maruki#maruki takuto#fuck that teh up there i'm not going back to fix it i'll just sound like a cringe 13 year old on tumblr in 2014#i'm not saying you can't criticize him i'm saying that acting like he's evil on a shido level or even Near that is stupid#because. again. maruki is a morally grey antagonist. he is NOT MALICIOUS.#i notice it's usually akechi fans who do this because of akechi's attitude towards maruki in-game#akechi has been one of my favorite characters ever even since vanilla p5 when the ending to his character arc kinda sucked#but him being one of my favorite characters does not impact my ability to read analyze and comprehend text#i think the persona fandom in general should try it sometime 👍
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have you ever gotten away, you ran away and it was basically the same but it felt different, you thought you made it out of the place that was killing you. but then the years pass like seconds and you blink and it's all the same somehow? you're still dying. and so you have to put yourself back in the coffin and you don't know if it's going to work it could be the worst decision you've ever made but it's dying this way, maybe, or dying for sure if you don't. so you put yourself in the fucking coffin. and maybe one day you'll break out the other side and you keep thinking you have but the time keeps passing so fast and it's so hard in here. but if you weren't in the coffin you know you'd be dead?
#local birb opens beak#i saw the tv glow#horrible retching sobs in the background#like okay what i need you to understand is#i'm mostly over the choice i had to make because well#it didn't kill me!#what i'm NOT over#is that i am STILL NOT OUT OF THE COFFIN#right??#like#the years still go by too fast the world still moves without me i still have months on end where i am not allowed to feel like a person#because of my fucking medical issues#and maybe that won't ever change?#but maybe it will#i don't know#it's just#a lot
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funniest thing ive learned (and that's coming from someone who had debilitating perfectionist tendencies) is that making your own mistakes is actually thrilling and really fun because it really feels like gaining xp and leveling up but irl. like ah shit i see. well i'll know that's a soak marker next time kinda deal
#it's like. making your own mistakes and then examining where you went wrong and the mechanism of it is THE ultimate personalized lesson plan#a mistake is an opportunity to really understand for yourself the framework / laws of the art in question#if you get it right every time / from the very beginning then you learn Nothing#you just exist. like a fish in water. you don't really understand the rules and the reasons for anything#this is why i ended up being happy i (-gets sniped before finishing the sentence)#not to sound like an annoying therapist-adjacent but mistakes and the ability to make them for yourself really are a gift#also it does not have to be Painful like i think the thing i learned most is that you do not HAVE to extra-worry and harm yourself#and shame yourself after making a mistake because actual understanding comes with clarity of mind#and you can't make a sound judgement when your mind is clouded by horrible amounts of shame and guilt etc#in fact it is more likely to make you double down and dig your heels in and make the mistake So Much Worse#this is something i learned thanks to 1) being forsaken by god and 2) getting into candlemaking#extra relevant now that i'm getting into music again
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ah btw I'm finally discovering the universe of Persona with Persona 3 reload since few days ;) and I play more and more each time I launch it lol I guess that's a good sign xD
#the intro was pretty long and it took me some time to adapt with ALL the things to do#and it's horrible bcs I want to start over already like with bg3 now I get how the game works loool#will certainly play a ng+ if I'm not done with it at the end xD#personal#Lola plays games#persona 3
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I've come to the conclusion that loving young royals doesn't mean I can't be critical about it, maybe especially bc I love the show so much I have such strong feelings about it, good and bad and I can love parts of canon and agree with it and appreciate it but I don't have to love it all. I have accepted that it's okay if I don't accept the ending and I don't have to force myself to support it. It's okay to not agree with all of canon and it's okay to not side with all of the creators' intentions/views. Loving a show doesn't mean you have to take everything the writers say on face value and that's the only version that is allowed to exist. Canon isn't everything and fandom is about curating your own experience that makes you happy and not miserable. You don't have to dismiss canon in every aspect and ignore it entirely, that's certainly not what I want but there is a fine line between being canon respectful, allowing some parts to exist and sometimes, yes, you just have to say "fuck canon" and move on for your own sanity and wellbeing
#yrtalk#young royals#personal#especically in the first two weeks of a new release everyone is feelings lots of intense emotions ranging from ecstatic to angry#everything in between is a part of it and i know i'm also feeling very strongly about it right now#i always try to stay levelheaded and rational and see things from an objective pov and be diplomatic about discourse#i don't want any of what i say drift off too much into meaningless hate instead of the constructive criticism it's supposed to be#but when you feel so strongly about something and sometimes you really just wanna say yeah i fucking hate it lol#but i always try to explain why and give understandable arguments and not just blindly hate on something#for example - I'm aware there are fans who have some problems with s2 and don't love the season whereas i do and it's my fave#and there is a difference between expressing some criticism and justified concerns which you can understand where it comes from#and those who are just like 'oh it's a horrible season. it was so shitty and we should get rid of it' which is dumb hate and just not true#and i can't support people like that and take them seriously#i can have my own issues with s3 from a subjective pov which can also include some justified criticism as well#but also still acknowledge it as a truly good piece of tv media and the quality is top notch#and that's why you have such high expectations and have critique because it is so good and sets such a high standard#with that being said i understand ppl not wanting to see any critic about it if they are riding the high of happy wilmon endgame#but that doesn't mean that i can't express my own opinions on my own blog and i will continue to do so#and maybe one day i will feel differently and accept or even like the ending who knows#but it doesn't have to happen. it's fine if it does but it's also fine if it doesn't
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Me when Luca Brasi is on screen in the movie: While this man is clearly primarily defined by his capacity for violent aggression and murder, one cannot help but feel sympathy for someone whose personal life is so minimal and unsatifsfying that being invited to a wedding would feel like such a significant occasion..
Me reading about Luca Brasi in the book:
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#the way my jaw hit the floor when i reached the part of the novel where we learn what he actually did...#like it's already horrible in itself but the fact that he forced that poor midwife to actually commit the act..truly demonic#the fact that he was still regularly seeing sex workers...imagine how terrifying that would be for them jfc#i do find it funny how Sonny is like 'I'll fight anyone in the world idgaf! (except Luca Brasi because I'm not actually insane)'#talking about hilarious the fact that my poor boy Tom thought he had just gotten a nice one night stand#and then ended up in some sort of love triangle with the absolute worst person you could imagine for this situation..#i don't know where that came from but that was pretty funny ngl#i mean i do feel awful for poor kelly but still#the godfather#luca brasi
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attempt to idly discuss concept of custom wedding vows with 🌸 ground to a halt after the realization that neither of us actually, like, wants to try to figure out what the fuck we'd be promising
can you do custom vows, but instead of vows to do stuff, it's just a list of the superbly good qualities of the other person in order to make it clear why any rational actor would agree that you should obviously plan to keep hanging out with them as long as possible
#getting married is not really a thing id be doing in order to concretize any promise that isn't 'we really really want to keep doing this#and want to experience various economic benefits of that desire and also invite my family to celebrate about how great 🌸 is'#it's not that i don't consider us to have commitments to each other it's just like. the vows would be essentially 'i promise to try to have#continuity of personality with my current self to the extent that that bears on the qualities that make our relationship work well'#i don't know why it bothers me so much. but the idea of idk. promising to always listen to 🌸 or whatever feels genuinely horrible#it's sort of. parodic? either i'm doing it and/or have given good reason to believe i would be receptive to and capable of working toward i#or not. and either way. why are our families watching us reiterate that information.#on the other hand i would REALLY like to get up and give a speech about 🌸's innumerable deeply admirable qualities which strongly#motivate me to continue living with and knowing and supporting them.#so if i do that instead. do you think anyone will like. notice.#box opener#i guess it's good to realize that i have a STRONG IDEOLOGICAL OPPOSITION TO WEDDING VOWS before we're publicly engaged#but also. we are really rejecting a lot of the wedding concept. it's possible this is going to end up being two speeches and a dance party.#a rabbi can stand nearby. for ambiance.
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Following the ii dark fics thing.
On some- if not most of the dark fics, disorders also tends to be used as a main thing to explain why the character is doing what they're doing. Which is, of course, not really great. Most au's that do this are about the Bright Lights as well.
Listen.
I can totally GET it. Mental health is a very important thing and having it ruined by people, or by other factors, can and WILL do some real damage to you. Yes. I can totally see a character doing questionable things because of their mental health being so so bad that it leads them to think that maybe, just maybe, these thoughts and actions aren't as bad, or that given the situation they're in, they're somewhat justified/it isn't inherently terrible of them, because of the state they're in doesn't let them think clearly, and they hold onto something because it's the last thing that makes them feel real.
One thing is doing that.
The other thing is using mental illnesses or their symptoms (per example: BPD, DID, Schizophrenia, and others) as the main reason as to why a character has done a killing spree or commited terrible actions. Meanwhile yes, having said disorders and going through heavy amounts of stress, and having no support can really make things difficult, mental illness won't make you a criminal or an awful person, a disorder isn't something you can just use for "oh well they have this so they commited murder because of this", people that have those already go through enough with others not even accepting that their condition is real or that it doesn't make them a bad person, for other people to use those disorders as a "Hey So This Is Why This Character Is Bad Now" for a story.
just sayin'
#inanimate insanity#ii#inanimate insanity invitational#ii 2#ii 3#ii fandom neg#if a part of this is disrespectful PLEASE let me know#despite having depression i am not very great at using mental health terms as well#but this is a recurring issue i saw at osctwt and generally on dark fics#i recognize that i did that mistake one time. but i ended up changing everything about the au and erased that.#fics on mental health can be so so much better than how they are nowdays#and listen i'm NOT saying that the character CAN'T have any disorders or anything.#of course they can.#but DON'T make them the reason as to why they're an “horrible person”.
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#lydia martin#teen wolf#twedit#stiles is a walking shitpost#please work with me for the context of some of these i was just trying to capture the vibe!#like lydia starts off lying to everyone and herself about who she really is#and then makes friends and also tries to process all of the horrible violent stuff that happens to her#and by the end she's like i'm weird!!! i'm a banshee!!!#but also i'm a person and real smart and i don't want to scream at you#i just want to talk
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