#i'll never stop being trans

[sleepy-softboy]

I love being transgender and I'll never stop.

Today was scary but raising 3k with my sister and being with my girlfriend filled me with hope. I love being transgender and I'll never stop.

[biracy]

Sorry for the water filter but can I be honest the more I think abt it the more I kind of hate this post. I think it'd be better if it didn't namedrop an actual real life trans person for the sake of going "ew, I don't wanna look like THAT" (especially when contrasting him to these random guys, all I hear in "Elliot Page does not look like Just Some Guy" is basically "I don't think Elliot Page 'passes'"), but even then I think it's interesting how "I am a trans man who wants to present traditionally masculine" is presented as like, the hot take of the century. Should we throw a party. Should we invite. idk. Buck Angel

[selfinflictedgunshotwound]

men are so disappointing in so many ways i know i shouldn't expect most of them to be dignified humans but it's crazy. i need to get over this guy he's making my sense of self crumble even faster than it usually does. like he's just so unlike my usual type and i'm pretty convinced he's stupid and slutty and not discerning whatsoever. not to mention boring like i know even if i did have a chance with him he wouldn't Get Me at all so it's a bigger waste of time that usual and i'm actually pretty tired of men in general and definitely tired of parasocial relationships because they drive me insane for months typically. thankfully it's only been like 2 weeks if that at this point. idk. sigh. i know literally virtually nothing abt him as a person and ofc liking any public figure who you know nothing about is only setting yourself for heartbreak and disappointment to begin with bc you already know nothing is gonna come from it but. in a way it's almost addictive to become obsessed with someone and not be looked at with the same level of scrutiny. i don't think anyone in real life would ever try to get to know me as much as i try to get to know people who i'll never even meet. lmao! but that's the thing... idk... i have a lot of love in my heart and it consumes me and i reject my pride usually when i'm into someone. i want to know more... like VORACIOUSLY consuming anything with information about them involved simply because i think knowing someone is a very deep form of love but of course you can never truly know anyone. not completely. and that scares me i think which is why it's always probably been easier for me to never really TRY to be with anyone or have anything real. idk. this turned into me psychoanalyzing myself real quick but SOMEONE needs to bc i need to understand what the fuck is wrong w me.

[happy10thousandyears]

I keep getting afraid of being a predatory lesbian or being disrespectful towards trans women when I'm drawing my ocs because they have a messy dynamic ... but I do enjoy toxic GL dynamics because I like to project my own traits and traits I may despise or admire onto both persons involved...

[fobnsfwdoodlesbackup]

the other anon that mentioned your genderswap designs reminded me that i'm so deeply obsessed w them as well...i esp love your girl patrick omg everything you draw w her is so good! even just the design in general i love, i always come back to that one doodle page you did w a couple different girltricks and i love them all sm, and your art of her w girl pete + that one of her gettin railed...whoof i am a girl lover thank you for feeding me🙏🙏

Hello why are y'all so nice 🥺🥺🥺

The owner of this blog is ✨pansexual✨ so I really appreciate that y'all follow me through drawing different genders and sexualities!!

[abel-draws]

OCs pride event

Send me an ask with a couple of characters and I'll draw them together uvu <3 Will it be shippy or will they bicker and groan about the idea of kissing? Who knows, only one way to find out.

Some notes!

I'll decide the outcome depending on what's more in character.

Don't ask for Alphonse, Benjamin and ginger together, they're related.

This event's purpose is to, besides drawing my usual ships, to draw characters together that I usually don't! So just ask about what'd be fun to see. If you suggest a ship that'd never work in a romantic or sexual way I'll just draw something fun about them screaming at the possibility.

Will draw the requests slowly through June <3

You can check more info about the characters either looking through my blog or in my toyhouse

[hypnowave]

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[spadefish]

once again mourning the fact that i have an unfixable injury that has permanently fucked up my ability to do my fucking job

[joyful-downer]

I see. Today is panic, dysphoria and social anxiety day.

[fungisteri]

Huh, I've never been so dysphoric before I start stress eating. First time for everything I guess

[caramelmochacrow]

god, i feel so sick. the more i act like my feelings for my crush doesn't exist, the more it hurts. is this what it's like to be a pining idiot? i actually hate it. no one told me it'd be this painful......

(there's a stupid rant in the tags)

[snekdood]

idk why ppl think you wanting a different body, or in this case specifically, weight, somehow has something to do with them or you judging them? like i've worked through the fatphobia i grew up with and was used against me, idgaf what other people do and im also not repelled by or somehow grossed out by fat people given i tend to date fat people (not seeking them out, it just happens)-- if this is the case, how can you say that im somehow demanding you change in someway because I want to change myself? maybe stop seeing other people as extensions of you and this wouldnt be an issue..?

[mangledcreatureboything]

"Would you really trade your relationship with your mom for testosterone?? 🥺🥺🥺"

We were screwed from the start so HAND OVER THAT FUCKING TESTOGEL ❗❗❗

[tittyinfinity]

I was hanging out at the karaoke bar, chatting with a beautiful woman, and we were really hitting it off. I threw a couple of flirtatious comments her way. She giggled nervously, but abruptly stopped and looked at the floor.

She told me that she was too nervous to hit on people because she's trans and worries that people will view her as a predator and that she might get hurt.

My heart sank. I let her know that she could hit on me in whatever way she wanted and I would LOVE it. We spent the rest of the night hanging out and flirting. We ended up making out. It was great.

But I can't stop thinking about how that wasn't the first time a trans woman has said that to me. About how unsafe it is for some women that they feel the need to give out fucking disclaimers to have normal interactions with people.

We have GOT to make the world a safer place for trans women. It pisses me off that there are men at the bar who are openly predatory towards me without fear of consequence, yet a trans woman is too scared to even fucking call me pretty. And that's because she IS more likely to face worse consequences for lesser things! Like what the fuck!

You need to always check on your internalized biases. Being queer yourself doesn't absolve you of transmisogynistic thoughts and behaviors. Being bi/pansexual doesn't mean you don't hold those biases either! If you feel differently about a trans woman hitting on you than you feel about a cis woman or a man hitting on you, you need to evaluate that.

Trans women, I love you so fucking much. You should be able to express attraction and love as freely as everyone else. I hope you can always feel safe around me. And I'll never stop fighting until you can feel safe period.

[clownshrooms]

sometimes i think some of u do not understand the material conditions trans men & mascs live under

[genderqueerdykes]

there really is a cultural pressure for transmascs & men to detransition, and it comes from all sides. it comes from the queer community too, not just terfs and cishet transphobes.

it took me a while to realize why transphobic people and transandrophobic queers utterly despise trans guys & mascs who are over the age of like 25- it's because it pisses them right off that we've resisted their attempts to make us detransition. it makes them so angry to see they were unable to groom that person into a life of self-shame and repression. it really seems like MOST people believe that trans men will just detransition eventually in life? people NEVER think about older trans men, only teenage trans boys and trans men in their very early twenties.

when i was involved with my local punk scene i was addressed with condescension, almost everyone around me didn't accept transmasculinity as a legitimate identity and thought that we would've transitioned by now in life. i encountered folks who would talk about transmasculinity with subtle disgust that made me feel like i was doing something wrong, and people who expressed overt disgust, saying in plain english that they were disgusted by breasts and vaginas because they were gay men. all along the way i was literally mocked for not having a penis, and one of my roommates started treating me differently once they found out i didn't have one (because they were attracted to me)

i've been on T for 9 years, and been out as a trans man for a bit longer than that, and i noticed as i've aged i've also attracted a lot of folks who have tried to deter me from identifying as a trans man, either through directly telling me that trans men are inherently dangerous, or by implying that women or another gender are safer, quieter, calmer, "less traumatizing to be around," etc. one of my exes told me they were terrified to date me (despite literally going out of their way to do so for over half a year) because they were scared i would be transphobic to them because i'm a transmasculine lesbian.

i received pressure from online friends to either detransition and become an intersex butch woman, or to something feminine adjacent or nonbinary. for years i dealt with a few friends who kept subtly hinting that i should stop identifying as a trans man or trans masc because of how awful transmascs are- going as far as to sending me screenshots of transmascs speaking, complaining about them and calling them whiny, annoying. talking about how all transmascs are entitled, how all transmascs take things too personally, how we complain too much, and so on.

people make no effort to make space for transmascs and men. i met 0 transmascs in my local punk community that i was able to stay in contact with. none. i met a few in passing but none that actually were introduced to me in a capacity where i could actually try to befriend them. it really felt like other punks in the scene were desperately trying to keep the transmascs apart at times. excuses were made as to why i couldn't hang out with other transmascs i liked, but i was constantly being forced to befriend transphobic cis gay men and transandrophobic transfemmes who outwardly expressed hatred and disgust of us. it really felt like it was on purpose... almost as if other members of this community wanted our attention, but never wanted us to give each other attention or a sense of community. like we were objects, not people to be included in the community for real. satellite friends, if you will.

i'll be honest with you. i was at my lowest at this point. i realized i wasn't just a trans man and that i'm a genderqueer person who experiences multiple genders, including womanhood and an "other" gender, which was great. however now i was being forced to completely stuff down being a man for the sake of other people. instead of folks telling me they'd rather not hang out with transmascs, folks rather just attempted to guilt me for identifying as such in the hopes i'd stop identifying that way. i was being told daily that trans men and mascs are inherently violent and terrible to be around. i was in discord servers where transmascs were being kicked constantly for getting even slightly upset about transandrophobia, or being unfairly targeted by staff.

it's violence, but nobody wants to call it that. i pulled myself out of there and am now able to contact other transmascs and trans men who are proud of who they are and have elevated me back into a headspace where it's okay to truly be myself. just keep in mind that if you feel like you're in that situation, you're not alone. people who attempt to groom others are often very subtle it's not always up front. they will start slipping in hateful sentiments very slowly and make you feel like maybe they're the ones who are actually right.

it feels good to be an almost 32 year old trans guy. there's nothing to be ashamed about there. people project their feelings on to my gender and that has nothing to do with me. it has nothing to do with you, either. people will just project on to you for whatever reason- hatred is usually the motivator there. if you encounter folks who keep trying to badger you out of identifying as your gender, no matter who you are, transmasc, transfemme, transneutral, trans anything- they are not good for you. they are not your friends. they do not accept you as you are and you deserve so much better.