#if anything it seems like my desire to change my weight is more or less a trigger for you and thats not reason enough to try to change

[snekdood]

idk why ppl think you wanting a different body, or in this case specifically, weight, somehow has something to do with them or you judging them? like i've worked through the fatphobia i grew up with and was used against me, idgaf what other people do and im also not repelled by or somehow grossed out by fat people given i tend to date fat people (not seeking them out, it just happens)-- if this is the case, how can you say that im somehow demanding you change in someway because I want to change myself? maybe stop seeing other people as extensions of you and this wouldnt be an issue..?

[rootedinrevisions]

Kinktober 2024: Day 7 (late)

SUMMARY: Jake had always been confident, the calm in any storm, but lately, the weight of an upcoming mission had cast a shadow over him. No matter what you tried, his mind remained distant, locked on the challenges ahead. Desperate to help him unwind, you took a bold step, sinking to your knees before him, offering a moment of release from the pressures weighing him down. As his eyes finally met yours, dark with both surprise and need, you knew you had his full attention. In that moment, the tension between you shattered, and what followed was a much-needed escape for both of you.

PROMPT: "You look so pretty on your knees."

KINK: Face Fucking

WARNINGS: 18+ SMUT. (Male Receiving Oral)

WORD COUNT: 768

AUTHOR'S NOTE: I am aware that I am getting this posted very late. I am so sorry for that! There was a family emergency I was taking care of most of today which didn't leave me any time to write or get anything posted. Hopefully, it's worth the wait!

TAG LIST: @omgbrianab I @shanimallina87 I @fanficmom94 I @smoothdogsgirl I @djs8891 @saucy-sassy-sparkly I  @alipap3 I @dudinhastuff I  @lunatygerqueen   I  @hookslove1592 I @glenpowellluver

If you would like to be added to any of my Tag Lists please feel free to comment, send an ask, or send a DM and I'll be happy to get you added! (I currently have one for Glen Powell & His Characters, One for Bradley/Rooster now, and then a third for WWE/Wrestling. I also can create one for Bucky & other MCU characters if there's interest for more of those characters!)

Jake had been distant for days, his usual lighthearted demeanor weighed down by the upcoming mission. You’d seen him stressed before, but this felt different. He was quieter, less playful, and constantly lost in thought. You hated seeing him like this—so consumed by his duty that it seemed to block out everything else.

Tonight, you were determined to change that, even if just for a few minutes. He was sitting on the edge of your shared bed, elbows resting on his knees, staring blankly at the floor. You came up behind him, wrapping your arms around his shoulders, and pressed a kiss to the side of his neck.

“Jake,” you whispered softly, your lips brushing against his skin.

He hummed, acknowledging you but not fully engaged.

You tried again, this time letting your hands wander down his chest, feeling the muscles tense beneath your touch.  “You need to take a break. You’ve been thinking about that mission all day.”

“I can’t,” he muttered, his voice tight, as if his thoughts were an anchor pulling him down. “There’s too much riding on this one.”

You understood. His job demanded perfection, and the stakes were always high. But you also knew he needed to get out of his own head for a bit—to relax, even if just for a moment.

You kissed him again, this time more insistently, running your fingers through his hair as you tried to coax him out of his trance.

But it wasn’t enough. His mind was miles away, focused on the mission that was still days off. You pulled back slightly, frustration and concern warring within you. You couldn’t stand to see him like this, so you decided to take a different approach.

Slowly, you sank to your knees in front of him, your hands moving to his belt. His eyes flicked to yours, momentarily surprised by your shift in position.

“What are you doing?” he asked, his voice low, his brows furrowing in curiosity.

“Helping you relax,” you said simply, your voice soft but determined as you undid his belt and tugged it free.

You could feel his hesitation as he watched you work the button and zipper on his pants, but he didn’t stop you. Instead, he let out a shaky breath, his body already responding to the promise of your touch.

As you pulled his pants down just enough to free him, you glanced up, and his gaze was locked on you, desire flickering in his eyes.

“You look so pretty on your knees,” he murmured, the compliment causing a rush of heat to flood your cheeks.

You wrapped your hand around him, feeling his length pulse in your palm. Then you leaned in and took him into your mouth, Jake’s hand immediately finding your hair, his fingers threading through the strands as he exhaled a deep, shaky breath. His hips twitched slightly, and you could feel the tension in his body begin to ease.

It didn’t take long before his hand tightened its grip in your hair, holding you in place as his hips began to move on their own. His breath came in short, shallow gasps, the stress of the past few days melting away with each thrust. You could feel the weight of his worries lifting, even if only temporarily, as he lost himself in the sensation of your mouth.

“God,” he groaned, his voice rough, his body finally giving in to the release he so desperately needed. You could sense the shift in him, the way his focus turned completely to you, to the pleasure you were giving him, and it sent a rush of satisfaction through you.

Finally, his movements stilled, and he released a low, guttural groan as he came, his body shuddering as the tension drained from him. He stayed there for a moment, his hand still gently tangled in your hair, his breath uneven as he came down from the high.

When he finally opened his eyes and looked down at you, there was something softer in his expression—a quiet gratitude, perhaps, or a deep sense of relief. He gently pulled you back up to him, his lips pressing against yours in a slow, appreciative kiss.

“Thank you,” he murmured against your lips, his voice warm and genuine. He pulled you into his lap, cradling you close as if he didn’t want to let go. “I didn’t realize how much I needed that.”

You smiled softly, resting your head against his chest. “You need to take care of yourself too, Jake. Not just the mission.”

He sighed, his arms tightening around you. “I know,” he said, kissing the top of your head. “And now it’s time to take care of you.”

[swappingbryn]

It’s Your Soul, Cry If You Want To

We’d been on several dates, had never had sex, she kept saying she was old fashioned and didn’t want to rush. However, she finally agreed to stay the night and as you were getting ready, pumped up if you will, when his insecurities got the better of him.

I wasn’t ugly, and had sent a picture of myself, but I knew I could look better, I wasn’t short, but just being average FEELS short, and my dick was fine, but bigger is always better. I knew I couldn’t change any of this, I just wish I had all these ideal qualities. I sighed “I wish I was that version of myself.”

Suddenly, a cloud of blue smoke swirled in front of me, solidifying into a tall, horned man.

“Mortal, I will grant you anything you desire, but there is a price, the only question is, are you willing to pay it?” He questioned.

“What? Who are you?” I replied.

“Who, rather what, I am matters not. What matters is what you want and what you’ll pay for it” he answered while waving a hand. I went to protest, but suddenly felt the need to not ask anymore questions.

“I have a big date, and I really like her, but I don’t know if she’ll like me. I just want to be different, like the best version of me.” I said.

“I can do that for you. Make you taller, better looking, muscular, more endowed, even richer, smarter, and can even guarantee she will like you. But that is not free.” It replied.

“What will it cost me? I don’t have much money.” I told him.

“I have no need for money, and I’m offering YOU wealth. What I want is your soul.” As he said this I recoiled, “But worry not, you will retain most of it for the rest of your life, I will only claim it after you’ve lived a long, healthy life. You’ll have fifty good years living as the best possible version of yourself, happy, with a loving wife and large family. All you give is the time after you die.” He finished.

“I can’t, this is so wrong.” I quickly said.

“I understand, I will leave you.” And with that, he swirled back into a cloud of smoke. As he was vanishing, I couldn’t help myself.

“Wait, I accept” I yelled.

The blue cloud enveloped me and then solidified again, but everything was different. My apartment was larger, filled with nicer things, better view, my clothes were nicer, I was taller and could feel my mind running faster, and a heavy weight in my pants.

He snapped his fingers and a speck of light, smaller than the head of a match, flew out of me. It hovered in the air until he took a deep, magically deep breath, almost like a vacuum sucking it into him. He held that breath for a long time, and as he did, his body changed.

As he held that breath, his horns receded into his head, his skin turned a human shade of tanned white, he looked almost normal, except the eyes, his eyes stayed eerily golden. After what seemed like hours, but was really less than a minute, he exhaled, and then his eyes changed to blue, the same shade mine are, or were, as it looks like mine turned a dull brown.

He walked out of my penthouse apartment, looking entirely human now. Showing off his body, acting cocky and sure of himself.

“See you later bro, not too soon, I think you have, hmm, fifty seven years. I hope you enjoy your new life. Don’t worry, to everyone else, this has always been this way, so you don’t need to be afraid of people noticing.” And with that, he left.

Thank you @swapsrus for suggesting this model.

[pumpkinbxtch]

thrill me &

i'll take you to a ride ✷

— leo valdez x daughter of hades!reader

summary: Sometimes things happen when you let yourself get excited and you are a daughter of Hades. Warnings: none

Your relationship with Leo was very new. You were in that awkward stage where both of you blushed constantly when your fingers tried to interlace or one of you longed for the other's hug, that phase where you couldn't express your desires and hesitated when it came to showing them. This was most evident when you kissed.

However, for you, it involved a bit more than just worrying about appearing clumsy; sometimes, your powers could play tricks on you. Being a child of the big three already made things messy due to strong emotions, now being a daughter of Hades like you, where you spent your time repressing your emotions to avoid bringing the dead to the surface or ending up in China like your brother Nico, made everything even more complicated by itself.

It would be simpler if only your palms sweated, and you could be enjoying being with your boyfriend on a beautiful day in the strawberry field while Leo and you were having a kissing session on a picnic blanket. While both were craving for touch everything was going wonderfully.

The big deal was when Leo put his hand on your waist to pull you closer to him, that simple move made your heart race and lose control, that's when you felt your surroundings change and the overwhelming sensation of being sucked into darkness.

You panicked, felt embarrassed, but you clung to your boyfriend's hand tightly. If it weren't for the spins and Leo feeling like he had just been thrown from a first floor, he might have plead you to let go of his hand before you broke it with the force you were holding it. Although to be honest, you wouldn't have done it even if he begged, you couldn't let anything else happen to him because of you. Amid what seemed like an imminent darkness, another hole opened up, and gravity forced you to fall face-first into an alley.

Your boyfriend's groans made you blush, you wanted to disappear, but if you thought about it for a second more, it probably would happen, and you were tired of that shadow travel already. You rolled onto your side and avoided facing Leo, still lying in the street feeling like a loser, you didn't even have an idea of where they were.

— baby, are you okay? — Leo crawled towards you, and you bit your lower lip. You would have bothered to run if it weren't for your tiredness. You yawned and slowly sat up, hair falling in your face and hands covered in dust. With a slight breeze, the climate change was noticeable to you.

He took you by the shoulders, helping you sit up completely, him squatting and you sitting on the pavement. He sighed seeing you unharmed but curiosity lingered in his gaze. You hugged yourself, hoping it would give you strength to speak. You already felt your cheeks burning and your face forming a grimace of discomfort.

— Sorry, did I... get carried away?.— Leo grinned like an idiot, and chuckled while shaking his head slowly. He fixed your hair and tucked some strands behind your ear, his sweet touch made you sway sleepily. He noticed.

— Did my girl overdo it? — Despite the obvious teasing in his voice, the words comforted you, making you feel less guilty because that's exactly what Leo wanted, he didn't blame you for anything, he wasn't even upset, he was just taken by surprise.

— Sorry — you repeated with pleading eyes. Leo gently took you by the back of the neck and pressed his lips against your forehead, barely touching your skin.

—It's okay, amor. Let's see where we are — he murmured and helped you to your feet, holding your body tightly so you could put most of your weight on him.

Your eyes widened, and sleep left you for a second when you noticed that the signs seemed to be in another language, the streets were too different and narrow.

— I've been here — he said, admiring his surroundings, reaffirming his grip on your hand. You raised your eyebrows, waiting for him to continue, and he began to walk with you down the alley until you reached the widest part. You admired the architecture in better detail, the blue sky, and the people. You were no longer in Long Island Sound.

—'ll tell our kids that you kidnapped me to go on a trip together to Italy — Leo joked, and you felt your ears burning.

He looked at you with those chocolate eyes that turned gold in the sunlight. You silently admired how his tanned skin shimmered or the small wrinkles that formed when he smiled, everything about him seemed perfect. Of course in the future you would want to have his children.

— Dork — you accused him, unable to hide that typical way of yours of disguising embarrassment, he let out a small laugh. Leo loved that about you. He cleared his throat, it was a little dry from yelling.

— Well, but anyway, after we take a walk and enjoy this nice place because we would be idiots not to. I wonder... — He leaned towards you, teasingly, his thumb rubbing your palm. — How will I have to 'thrill' you to come back?

[queenshelby]

Forbidden Desire (Part 14)

Pairing: Thomas Shelby x Reader (Female/Incestuous)

Warnings: Incest (at this stage accidental), Age Gap, PTSD, Domestic Abuse, Self-Harm, Fluff, Smut

Please comment and engage xx 😘

The following morning however, when you arrived at the factory office, Tommy was waiting for you, sitting behind his large wooden desk.

His presence filled the room, commanding attention and respect. He wore his usual attire: a dark suit, white shirt, and tie, accentuating his powerful physique.

As you walked towards him, you couldn't help but admire the raw masculinity that radiated from him. His muscular frame, piercing eyes, and rugged good looks made him truly irresistible. The sight of him brought back memories of the past, the passionate encounter that had left you aching for more.

But, his face was nothing but stern as he looked up at you.

"Come, sit," he said bluntly as he gave you an order

rather than an invitation. Tommy’s commanding tone sent a thrill through you, reminding you of the raw power that radiated from him. You hesitated for a moment, unsure if you wanted to be so close to him right now, but you complied nonetheless.

As you sat down, Tommy's gaze remained steady, unwavering, as though he was trying to read your thoughts.

"You are a Shelby now, whether you like it or not. And as a Shelby, you do not associate yourself with men like Liam O'Connor," your uncle explained and your pulse quickened as he spoke, feeling the weight of his words as anger rose from deep within you.

"Are you jealous Tommy or are you actually of the view that, as a Shelby, I cannot walk with a man of my choosing?" you queried with a hint of defiance in your voice.

"And why would I be jealous, eh? You are my fucking niece," 

he retorted, his eyes flashing with anger and possessiveness.

The tension in the room escalated as the two of you locked gazes, the intensity of your feelings for one another undeniable.

"I am your niece, yes, but some time ago, I was also your lover," you challenged, your voice low and measured, conveying a sense of power and control.

Tommy's expression hardened, his jaw clenching tightly. "What happened between us then doesn't change anything," he growled, clearly struggling with his emotions.

"No, it doesn't and that is exactly why you need to stay out of my private affairs, Thomas," you agreed, maintaining eye contact, refusing to be intimidated by his dominance.

His demeanour shifted, becoming less hostile as he sighed deeply, acknowledging your statement. "Alright, fine. But remember that the men I employ work for me for a reason. They are dangerous men, Y/N. Liam O'Connor is one of them and, I do no longer trust him now that he has taken an interest in you," Tommy explained after having slept on Polly's revelations and admissions. 

His declaration hung heavily in the air, a threat and a promise rolled into one. It stirred a mix of emotions within you - fear, excitement, and longing.

"You still want me, don't you?" your words echoed throughout the room, causing a chill to run down his spine. There was a pause as both of you took in the gravity of your statement. Tommy's eyes narrowed as he studied your face intently, searching for any signs of deception. His expression turned thoughtful as he considered your question.

"It doesn't matter what I want Love. You are family and I need to protect you," Tommy determined with a sigh.

"I can protect myself, Tommy!" you argued, determination etched on your features. "I'm not some fragile flower who needs to be shielded from harm." Your defiance only seemed to fuel his determination to protect you.

"You may think you're stronger than you are, but the truth is, we all need someone to watch our backs, eh," he replied with a steely resolve. "You are my responsibility, whether you like it or not and unless you want me to tell my brother about your relationship with Liam O'Connor, I want to know when you are going to see him next, eh," Tommy told you firmly, his eyes boring into yours.

There was silence in the room, as you processed his words. Despite your resolve, you were beginning to realize that he was serious about his warning.

"Tonight... I am seeing him tonight," you told him, looking downcast and fueled with anger. The mere mention of informing your father about Liam made you feel uneasy, knowing how he would react upon finding out about your dalliance.

"Where?" Tommy asked, clearly satisfied with your response.

"At my house," you admitted, feeling a mixture of guilt and frustration welling up inside you. 

"I will have your house watched by men who can be trusted, just in case, eh," Tommy stated matter-of-factly, his voice devoid of emotion. 

"Fine," you conceded, unable to argue further.

You knew that despite your resistance, Tommy's protective instincts ran deep, and there was little point in trying to change his mind. He needed to ensure you stayed safe, even if it meant encroaching on your personal life.

"You may go now," Tommy eventually told you with a note of finality in his voice and the room fell silent once again, as you stood up and prepared to leave.

A heavy burden weighed on your shoulders as you realized the precarious situation you found yourself in. The complexities of your relationships with Tommy and Liam threatened to consume you. How could you balance these competing forces without succumbing to the whims of either man?

***

On your way home, your thoughts drifted to the events of the evening. A surge of adrenaline coursed through your veins as you anticipated your meeting with Liam.

Part of you was excited by the forbidden nature of your secret rendezvous, while another part of you felt consumed by guilt, knowing that you were still deeply in love with Tommy. You recalled the passionate moments you shared with him, wondering if they could ever be rekindled.

Arriving at your house, you carefully checked the area before letting yourself in. Your heart raced as you imagined Tommy's men watching from the shadows, their cold stares following your every move.

It was awkward to know that you were being watched, yet there was also a sense of safety that came with Tommy's protection. He may be harsh and domineering, but deep down, you knew he cared for you.

Liam was already waiting for you when you entered your house, looking eager and slightly nervous. 

"Fuck, how did you get inside?" you asked, surprised to see him sitting on your lounge, sipping whiskey. 

"Your mother let me in before she left," Liam explained, his eyes glinting with darkness. 

"How do you know my mother?" you asked, suspiciously trying to gauge his intentions.

"I don't. But she saw Tommy's men outside and realised that I was one of them," Liam explained before advising you that, by now, Tommy's men would have left. 

"He asked them to watch you, because of me, didn't he?" Liam questioned, his tone laced with subtle aggression. You nodded silently, feeling the heat rise to your cheeks as you acknowledged the fact.

"There is something you should know about me, Y/N," Liam began, his voice taking on a deeper timbre. "I don't take kindly to anyone interfering in my affair, and that includes Thomas Shelby," he went on to say angrily, his gaze fixed on you, his intent clear.

"Listen, Liam," you tried to calm him down, but he wouldn't be pacified as, instead, he approached you, laying his claim.

"I love you, Y/N," he whispered tenderly, his hand caressing your cheek. "Don't let him come between us," he implored, his desire evident in his eyes.

You couldn't help but be swayed by his earnestness, his determination to stand against the seemingly insurmountable obstacle of your relationship with Tommy.

"Why should I believe you?" you asked, testing his sincerity.

"Because I am ready to fight for you, Y/N," he assured you, his voice full of conviction. "And together with the help of my acquaintance, Michael Gray, we can take over the family business," 

Liam continued, his eyes bright with ambition.

You hesitated, absorbing his words. It was the first time he had spoken about this alliance openly, and you couldn't ignore the looming presence of your uncle and the power he held over you.

"But what about Tommy and Arthur?" you questioned, genuinely concerned about the consequences of your actions.

"I don't care about them. They are two spent horses," Liam responded, his tone bordering on aggressive.

"Does Polly know about this?" you wondered aloud, your brow furrowing.

"Polly knows nothing," Liam insisted, a gleam of mischief in his eyes. "She would tell Tommy if she knew. We need to play our cards right." he suggested, and you could not believe what you were hearing.

"This is why you pursued me isn't it?" you probed further, seeking clarification while wondering where Tommy's men were at this point.

They were meant to be watching your house, but you felt as though they were neglecting their duties as, all of a sudden, Liam reached for your wrists.  

His touch made you anxious, leaving you vulnerable. "What are you doing?" you asked, trying to remain calm as his attitude changed. 

Liam took your hand in his, his grip strong and steady. "We are more than capable of seizing power from those who seek to control us," he said with confidence. "Thomas Shelby may hold power now, but it won't last forever. If we unite together, we can create something new, something better," he said, his voice dark and authoritative.

You looked around your house, thinking about a way to escape, but there was none. Your heart was racing, and your heart was spinning as you realized Liam's true intentions. 

You understood now why he had pursued you relentlessly, using every charm and resource at his disposal. He wanted to make you fall in love with him so he could use your newfound affection to secure a position within the family business. It was a cruel twist of fate that put you in this predicament.

Liam watched you warily, his expression a mix of determination and anticipation. Taking a deep breath, you summoned all your courage and faced him squarely.

"So, you think that if I fall in love with you, I would help you make a move against my father and uncle?” you queried, your voice laced with disbelief.

"Yes, and I also believe that once we are together, we can form a powerful alliance and, together with Michael Gray and his wife, we can take over the business," Liam responded confidently, unaware of the trap he had set for himself.

Stunned by his audacity, you took a step back, processing his words. The truth was undeniably painful as Liam had used you to manipulate his way into your family, and you, unknowingly, had played right into his hands.

Your heart pounded violently against your ribcage, and you felt nauseous from the shock of the revelation. 

“Marry me Y/N, and help us take over,” Liam's words continued to echo in your ears, reminding you of his cold, calculating nature.  

"I am not going to marry you, Liam!" you gasped, fury and betrayal coursing through your veins. "And even if I ever was to consider marrying someone, it certainly wouldn't be you!" you ought to point out, fuelling Liam's anger.

Anger flaring in his eyes, Liam leaned closer, challenging you with his stare. "Is that so? Then perhaps you should reconsider your options, Y/N. Because if you don't cooperate, it won't bode well for you,” he threatened you.

Your heart raced, fearing the worst. "What do you mean?" you asked, attempting to maintain your composure.

"Are you threatening me, Liam?" you ought to clarify, albeit knowing the answer. 

"Not at all," he replied, his tone eerily calm. "But I cannot guarantee that your father would put a bullet into his brother's head if he ever found out about your intimate relations with your Uncle Tommy," Liam exclaimed, his eyes narrowing. "Now, unless you change your mind, I will be forced to take matters into my own hands and have a word with the rest of the Shelby Family, disclosing your incestuous liaisons. Maybe the papers would take an interest in this too, seeing that Tommy is running for politics now," he went on to say, knowing that this could well and truly destroy the family business. 

His warning sent shivers down your spine, causing you to realize the extent of the danger you were in. You trembled slightly, realizing the precarious position you were in.

"Do not threaten me, Liam! What do you expect me to do?" you asked, your voice quivering with fear.

"Simple," he replied coldly. "Marry me and help me and Michael take over," he repeated, and your heart plummeted into your stomach as you processed his demand. “Your Shelby name is what I need. It’s worth something,” he went on to say, causing you to shake your head again in disbelief.  

Marriage? To this man? You couldn't possibly submit to such a life, bound to someone so cruel and selfish. Your resolve strengthened, and you spoke firmly, determined not to succumb to his threats.

"No, Liam. I will not marry you not only because of your despicable tactics but also because I simply cannot bring myself to love you. I will see Tommy about this, and I already know what he will do to you if he finds out about your threat," you told him sternly, frustration and fury lacing your voice.

His face clouded over with anger; his jaw clenched tightly. His hands shook, betraying his rage, as he tried to control his temper. Within seconds, he reached for your throat, grabbing it tightly with one hand. Fear flooded your body, your heart racing wildly as he squeezed harder. You gasped for air, tears streaming down your cheeks as he choked you. 

"You will not fuck me over Y/N!" Liam cursed as his grip tightened, and you knew that he had every intention to kill you by this point, so you kicked and screamed. 

"Stop! Please!" you gasped loudly, trying to fight Liam off and alarm anyone outside.

“Scream as much as you like. Tommy’s outside are dead,” Liam informed you, choking you harder as suddenly, amongst your struggles, you heard the sound of the door opening, followed by the sound of footsteps approaching rapidly.

You heard Tommy's voice shouting, full of rage, "Let go of her!" he yelled angrily, causing Liam to startle momentarily before tightening his grip on your neck.

By this point, Liam’s eyes flashed with murderous intent, almost ignoring Tommy's presence until Tommy approached him from behind, trying to pull him away from you with force.

Eventually, Liam let go of you, and you dropped to the ground. A fight broke out, and Liam drew his gun, raising it and aiming it straight at Tommy.

This caused you to panic as you knew there was no time to reason with him. Desperate, you lunged toward Liam, hoping to grab the gun from his grasp.

But, before you could act, Tommy pulled his gun and fired, the loud boom deafening the room. Liam dropped to the floor, blood seeping from the wound. With a chilling final glare, he lost consciousness.

Tommy was covered in blood, but the blood he was covered in was not his own.

You crawled towards him on the blood-soaked floor, your heart pounding in your chest. Tommy grabbed you by the arm, pulling you to your feet. The room was deathly silent as you watched the gruesome scene unfold before you.

Your heart hammered in your chest, the horror of witnessing Liam's demise etched into your memory forever. As your gaze met Tommy's, you saw the mixture of relief and concern reflected in his eyes.

"You shot him?" you barely managed to say, your voice merely above a whisper.

"Of course, I fucking shot him, Love. He fucking deserved it, eh" Tommy said roughly, his eyes hard and unforgiving. 

The room went quiet, save for the ticking of the clock on the wall, as everyone processed the implications of Liam's demise. You felt Tommy's strong arms wrap around you, offering comfort and protection. 

"I did not know about his intentions, Tommy! I really did not fucking know," you cried, your body trembling as you clung to your uncle, desperately seeking solace in his arms. You held onto him fiercely, your fingers digging into his muscular shoulders, as you both stood amidst the carnage that had befallen you all.

Inside, you couldn't help but feel a rush of adrenaline as you realized how close you had come to losing Tommy, the man who had always been there for you, offering support and love despite your connection.

It was at times like these that you understood the depth of your feelings for him, and you yearned to confess those feelings openly.

Tommy, still holding you tightly, looked down at you with a mixture of love and concern in his eyes. "You couldn't have known, Love, and it doesn't matter now. It's going to be okay, eh," he murmured softly, pressing a gentle kiss on your forehead.

"How did you know to come?" you asked while cupping Tommy's blood-stained face.

Your heart ached, and you could feel a tear forming in the corner of your eye. This was not how you wanted things to end, but it seemed like fate had taken hold of your life yet again.

"Moss informed me of the carnage Liam left on First Lane. He shot two of my men, so I came here as quickly as I could,’ Tommy explained with a heavy sigh, the exhaustion evident in his tone. 

"Thank you,” you barely managed to say while Tommy’s hold on you tightened.

"I thought I would fucking lose you, Y/N," he told you while cupping your face with his blood-stained hands.

His words sent a shiver down your spine, a mix of love and concern resonating within them. You realized then just how deep your feelings for him ran, longing to express them openly but knowing that this wasn't the time or place. Embracing you tightly, Tommy looked down at you with a mixture of love and concern in his eyes.

Then, Tommy's voice deepened, his warm breath ghosting across your ear as he spoke.   ”There is something I need to tell you," he said gently. 

"What do you want to tell me?" you asked cautiously, bracing yourself for whatever he might reveal.

Tommy took a deep breath, exhaling slowly before speaking. "Alright, here it goes," he began before inhaling again sharply while your heart thumped wildly in your chest, and you could feel the heat rising in your cheeks.

Then, Tommy's brow furrowed, his expression becoming intense. "I still love you," he admitted, a hint of vulnerability creeping into his voice. "And I promise you, I will find a way to make it up to you, eh?” he said. His words were honest and filled with sincerity, warming your heart even more.

Suddenly, you found yourself being lifted into Tommy's arms, his strong embrace making you feel safe once more. The room felt smaller now, just the two of you, surrounded by the echoes of your past mistakes. "You should never have to experience any pain for my sake," he continued his voice low and tender.

As Tommy spoke, your heart raced faster, feeling the intensity of his embrace. The world seemed to melt away, leaving you alone with him. In his arms, you felt a sense of safety and belonging and, despite the gravity of the situation, a wave of relief swept through you as you acknowledged your feelings for Tommy, recognizing the bond that connected you. 

"I know why you did what you did, Tommy," you told him before closing your eyes and leaning against his broad chest, allowing the warmth of his body to envelop you, the strength of his arms providing a refuge.

"And I forgave you for it some time ago, but I couldn't forget. I couldn't forget about you, the kisses, the sex, everything we shared," you admitted, and a silence fell upon the room as you allowed your words to sink in. Slowly, the corners of Tommy's mouth curved upwards, a small smile emerging, betraying his emotions.

Without words, he lifted up your chin, making you look at him before brushing his lips against yours, tender and reassuring.

"Out of all the women in this world, I have to fall in love with my fucking niece, eh," Tommy smirked after pulling back slightly, eyes locking with yours as they filled with unspoken promises.

"Yes, Uncle Tommy. I am your fucking niece, and you can't tell me that the thought of this doesn't arouse you just a tiny little bit," you teased before Tommy lowered his head again, this time pressing his lips firmly against yours. It was a passionate, almost savage kiss that left you breathless. Every nerve ending in your body lit up with pleasure, sending electric currents coursing through your veins.

The atmosphere in the room shifted drastically, growing increasingly erotic as the sexual tension between you two escalated. , He bent his head down to press a light kiss on your forehead, the warmth of his lips sending shivers down your spine. "It does arouse me," he murmured softly, his voice thick with emotion. “A little bit,” he then added as you both stood there, covered in blood.

Unable to resist, you leaned in closer, your lips meeting his in a tender kiss once more. The world seemed to fade away, and nothing else mattered except the undeniable passion that ignited between you both.

Your kisses grew deeper, more urgent as you both tried to convey the intensity of your feelings through your touch. Your hands roamed over his muscular back, tracing the lines of his sculpted torso. You revelled in the power of his embrace, relishing the way his strong arms wrapped around you, protecting you from the world outside.

He pressed his lips against yours, his tongue dancing teasingly with yours. His hands roamed down your waist, drawing you closer and bringing your hips flush against his. As your hips moved rhythmically, Tommy's hand travelled lower, slipping beneath your dress to cup your derrière. You gasped softly, feeling the pressure of his palm against your sensitive flesh. With each passing moment, you grew more aroused, unable to resist the urge to explore the contours of his body, even in this somewhat inappropriate situation.

As your lips captured each other's, you felt the intensity of his passion surge through your core until Tommy finally pulled away.

"I will call Johnny Dogs to clean up this mess, eh?" Tommy suggested, seeing that you still had to deal with the dead body in your house, which, at least for the past five minutes, you had ignored entirely.

"Where am I going to stay tonight?" you asked almost teasingly, a small grin forming on your lips before you handed Tommy your phone, and he made the call.

"You will be staying with me, Love," Tommy told you firmly after having made contact with Johnny, his blue eyes filled with resolve. 

He knew that there was no safer place for you than under his roof, especially after the events of tonight. 

"And what will you do to me, at your house, Uncle Tommy?" you teased, letting your voice drop seductively. You let your hand slide down his chest, brushing along his hard abs before stopping at the button of his trousers.

"Well, first of all, I will get you cleaned up," he replied huskily, his eyes darkening with desire.

"And then, I will probably fuck you, that is, if you are a good girl and behave yourself, eh?" he replied with a playful wink, his hand moving underneath your dress, grazing the soft skin of your inner thigh.

You laughed, taking Tommy's hand in yours and placing it against your throbbing core. "I think I can manage to behave myself, Uncle Tommy," you responded seductively, arching your back to press your breasts against his chest. "Just make sure to remind me of your threats when the time comes," you added with a devilish grin.

Tommy's eyes twinkled with amusement and lust, and he pulled you closer, his large hands wrapping around your waist.

"Trust me Love, I will do more than just remind you of my threats," Tommy teased, a devilish glint in his eyes.

As your bodies swayed together, you couldn't help but marvel at the connection between you both. There was an undeniable chemistry that had always existed between you two, one that transcended the boundaries of blood relations.

"Now, let's go before more coppers get here, eh?" Tommy commanded, his deep voice resonating through you.

His fingers laced with yours, leading you out of the room and towards the staircase.

The atmosphere in the house was eerie, almost as if the air itself held a secret. Your eyes scanned the dimly lit hallways, searching for signs of danger or witnesses who may have seen what happened. As you passed through the grand entrance hall, Tommy guided you towards the exit, the cool night air greeting you as you stepped outside. He helped you into his car, ensuring that you were comfortable before starting the engine. The streets were deserted, casting a sombre shadow over the city. 

"So, what happens to the body?" you asked as Tommy drove off into the night, his eyes focused on the road ahead.

"That's not your concern, Love. My men will take care of it," he replied gruffly, a faint trace of unease crossing his face. 

"It sure sounds like you have done this before," you commented with a raised eyebrow, catching Tommy's hesitation. 

"You know I have," he answered simply, his tone betraying a hint of darkness. "And don't ask questions you wouldn't want answers to, eh?" Tommy's warning was clear, yet you didn't back down, instead choosing to remain silent and let the conversation trail off.

"I still love you," you teased with a soft laugh, knowing full well how much Tommy craved your affection.

"Good," Tommy smirked arrogantly as he parked his car near his house. "Because I'm not letting you go again,” he announced as your gaze met his, the intensity of your feelings for each other palpable as you exchanged looks that seemed to hold entire universes within them. This wasn't merely a physical attraction; it was something far more profound, an undeniable connection that defied logic and reason.

Tag List Insert

@sunbeamseas @saint-ackerman @oatmealisweird @naxxsstuff @amanda08319 @r-m-cidnah @elysiannook @cillshot @infireddabdab @tastycakee @harrysbestiee @lilybabe22 @adalynlowell @henrywintersdearestgirl @ietss @thatgirlthatreadswattpad @ryiamarie @axionn

@heidimoreton @nela-cutie @futurecorps3 @delishen @nosebleeds-247 @thirteenis-myluckynumber @gills-lounge @hjmalmed @lost-fantasy @tiredkitten @sidechrisporn @smallsoulunknown @charqing-qing @hopefulinlove @aporiasposts @shycrybaby @me-and-your-husband @hjmalmed @lacontroller1991 @galxydefender @aporiasposts

@galxydefender @hunnibearrr @saint-ackerman @lunyyx @gentlemonsterjennie1 @ihavealotoffandomssorry @nadloves @lost-fantasy @nolucesn@mcavoy-girl @hjmalmed @bloodybagels @obeyme4life @richiesgroupie @blushykiss @tatumrileyslover @teawithsatanx @orijanko @rhaenyra4ever @xcinnamonmalfoyx @budugu @nadloves @kmc1989 @bloodybagels @obeyme4life @richiesgroupie

[ace-of-gay]

I currently dont have a masterlist set up for this collection but i hope you enjoy this none the less, this will eventually be posted on ao3 but i dont have an account currently

Not betad or edited

Warnings: age regression, self neglect (not eating, not sleeping, etc.) slight panicked reader but not nearly enough to be a full warning, reader is a half ghoul half human cause this is my interpretation of a fantasy universe <3, cuddles!!!

age regression is a coping that can both voluntary and/or involuntary it is entirely safe and reccomended by therapists if they believe it would be effective for said person but as mentioned for some people it is entirely unpredictable, if this makes you uncomfortable please carry on thank you <3

This was originally written for my best friend so keep in mind this is our dream and thoughts and may not fit well into the ghost universe

Word count: 2,025 words

Nameless ghouls and papa copia taking care of half ghoul reader

Having spent a restless night wasnt uncommon for your or any of the ghouls, especially when seasons and elements were changing, you spent a good few weeks of the tour in your element but the farther and farther you traveled to bring enlightenment to others around the world the more the weather seemed to shift, this most recent nights travel not only took you to a new scene and new spirit of buzzing thrill but a stiffened weight of being completely out of your element, while yes it effects all ghouls it affected you far different.

Being part ghoul meant you weren't as aware of your instincts so feeling them shift always left you in a silent suffocating shock.

With so much bustle amongst the ghouls, papa having a chipper edge to his seemingly endless worries it kept the team heightened and moving, preparing and running through the setlist, this will be the biggest show yet in a city youre entirely new to.

You hid the encroaching feeling well, never once had any of the ghouls questions any difference to your demeanor; having one responsibility after another kept you busy all day nevery staying in one area for long, earbuds in and mask upon your dome, it was same as others methods of preparing just more secluded and in your zone, if there were any changes in anything at all papa, the ghouls and ghoulettes knew that they could calmly inturupt you in your flow.

Listening to every part of the setlist through the literal audio versions of it, everything on the outside seemed normal to everyone but the electric vibrations in your joints and dull ache in your head told you plenty, to the others you were staying silent to save your voice for later so to speak but to you the weight of speaking was way heavier than your desire to ask for help or for rest.

With the show quickly approaching and you having forgotten to eat you downed not one but two energy drinks, spiking youre adrenaline temporarily in hopes itd get you through the show.

All you had to do was get through the night off of artificial energy and true passion for others joy. Just like the full ghouls you spent your time during the show in your human form but unlike them you had a harder time forcing it to stay when you were exhausted.

Papa copia unbeknownst to you had his eye on you, hes the only one who saw you this morning, the deep bags under your eyes and your ghoulish grey having a pale green seemingly sickly color easily masked by your helmet, if all went well youd rest for extra tonight but he didn't see that being the only end to the night.

《~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~♡~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~》

You were a fan favorite, when you weren't singing backup vocals you were running around stage with your hagstorm base shredding in duos with swiss, bursts of fire being shot upwards, the only time you stay away from the edge of the stage, the light from the fire glinting against the slightly matte chrome picguard, just enough to catch you right in the eye blurring your vision with a blinding flash.

to the congregation watching below your jolts you send into moving your bass guitar looked like flare but for you it was sheer panic, the blinding flash was just enough to put you on the edge of tipping into a deeply unwanted headspace at the moment.

prancing over to where mountain is perched at his drums you take yourself out of the limelight and hide yourself in the downcast shadows from his drums, with the last three chords being extended for showmanship you give a desperate glance to papa with hope that he'll see your glance, and such he does.

You station yourself once more at your mic, you stum the starting chords and belt out backup vocals for the final song, your throat aches as your human form is slipping, your eyes having small flickers of change and a small stumble thankfully met with a stomp on the down beat.

papa makes his way your direction ending the set list with 'Darkness at the heart of my love', when it gets to the part without vocals he does hand flourishes while you play your bass passing by with his mic down "tieni duro piccolo", walking his way around the stage to stand center and finish up the song.

In a blurr of time everything felt like it was on sparks of muscle memory and you were at the front with all other ghouls taking a well deserved bow with a standing ovation for each and every single one of you.

Papa copia was the first to lead off stage letting the ghouls throw picks and a few drumsticks from mountain and what not, you didn't stay long to see everything but you did notice people throwing things onstage as gifts; off stage setting down your bass in a stand you stumble into papas open arms.

Your forehead lay gently atop his chest still in your helmet your horns sit near his collar bone shaking yohr head, "i cant papa, i cant" not entirely sure yourself what you meant he hummed in understanding and hushed you, gently rubbing your back and swaying side to side, "stai bene piccolo ghoul, you can rest now. Ive got you, matter of factly weve got you"

Finally relaxing enough to let your ghoul form fall free, your tail limp all of you is exhausted and you feel so small but people always said it was weird and not good, they never listened to you when you said it was involuntary or a coping mechanism it was just permanently bad.

"Oh piccolo, shh your thoughts are so very loud my dear, it is okay to be small, the ministry welcomes all with coping, we will care of you"

He holds you closer and tighter humming a tune, and just like that your walls had fallen, there was no more fighting it, big doe ghoulish eyes staring up at him, complete silence from you.

At this point the others had made their way backstage, dew came walking over to take over while papa helped collect all the instruments. "Dew, could you please take them to the bus? We will get everything "

《~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~♡~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~》in the bus now and changed in comfortable clothes dew led you to the ghoul pile nest, when you refused to sit down he stepped aside watching as you grab your comfort item from your personal bunk and made your way back to the nest laying in the center, followed by him curling himself around you.

The ghouls only ever took their helmets off when in a homely environment so dew having his helmet off was his symbol of saying you are safe.

Once everyone had finished packing up and putting stuff away they had all filed in slowly

Cumulus being the first to stop by you and dew at the nest, holding out a plush ghoul for you that she had picked up from the items thrown on stage, papa copia was next to stop by sitting with you and dew, you hadnt noticed until now that he was asleep holding onto you until mountain joined pulling him off of you so you could lean into papa as he held one of your comfort snacks and a juice, both already having been opened by him, he held you as you snacked.

Once you had finished he got up going to the front to drive the bus.

You were once more pulled into the cuddle pile by dewdrop his eyes open long enough to make sure all of your comfort items were tucked against your chest, between you both, "sleep little one, a tiny ghoul needs plenty of rest" soon joined by the rest you had finally fallen asleep, the ghouls were your element aswell. When finally at the hotel for the evening you were carefully awoken by papa, all the ghouls except dew had gotten up, but even he was awake, but he stayed to keep you warm, "it is time to go in, we are buddy system tonight, four ghouls in a room, each room has two king sized beds so its plentyful room"

You finally let go of dew and stretch, getting up to get ready you realize your overnight bag has already been packed and one of the taller ghouls hoodies layed out next to it, you could hear the ruckus at the front of the bus of all the other ghouls ready to bunk up in the hotel.

You slip on the hoodie which you now know belongs to swiss, his smell encapsulating your mind.

Papa comes up behind you placing a hand on your back "piccolo the ghouls have decided you can pick who youre bunking with, they want to be sure youre okay when tiny, loro ti amano"

You make your way to the front of the bus where you find the ghouls with their charm up. looking to papa followed by you tapping swiss, rain and mountain on the heads, the three stand up, mountain takes your bag and rain scurrys away and back with your mask in hand "are you able to use charm right now or is the mask a better option?" He questions

Taking a moment to test how well the charm feels, you point at the mask. Nodding he gently places it atop your head, he places his hand under your chin causing you to look up so he can buckle it up and tan pats you atop your head, swiss gently pulls the back of the hoodie at the bottom away from your back "curl your tail tiny" tucking it under the hoodie

Once in the room mountain sets down the bags he was carrying and helped take the mask off of your noggin, ruffling your hair causing you to chirp in response, rain and swiss hop on the bed closest to the door leaving the one near the window "copia is ordering food for everyone, hes getting youre favorite for you" mountain chimes, grabbing to tv channel guide and flipping through it.

"Movie?" You mumble causing all three of them to look over, normally youre completely silent when youre small, "you wanna watch a movie?" He questions flicking on the tv and sitting on the bed, he turns on Wall-E for you.

Sometime a few minutes later he feels you shuffle closer on the bed cuddling into his side with your comfort item in hand.

After dinner was delivered and eaten and the movie was over you had tucked yourself on your side of the bed you shared with mountain, rains lamp still on so he could read while swiss was practically cuddled ontop of him, every time you would shift or turn in bed they could hear it, causing them to watch you carefully when youd move or grumble is dissatisfaction.

there was just no way to get comfortable, this wasnt home or the bus, you werent wrapped in your family, you huff out rolling over to look at mountain, to your suprise he was looking right at you quizically.

You quickly curl into his side before he got the chance to say anything, "o parum ghoul, mi amor, papa is right, your thoughts really are so very loud" swiss sighs, pulling himself out of his bed followed by rain who lay on your open side and swiss next to mountain, it may not be a perfect ghoul pile but its better than before, rolling over when rain pulls out his book to read aloud, your head on his chest.

listen to the thrum and Rumble deep in his chest, your eyes fall closed but not before you wrap your tail around swiss' wrist where it resides clutched around mountain, your mind will feel fresh and lively tomorrow filed with the itmost of energy, especially after an evening full of cuddles and littlespace, rain places a gentle kiss atop your head and just like that you are asleep.

[666writingcafe]

Gluttony

I should have known this was going to happen sooner rather than later.

Over the last few weeks, I've gradually grown less and less hungry. At first, I chalked it up to stress from these mock classes at RAD that me and my brothers have had to take, but anything I've done to relieve said stress only seems to exacerbate it.

And then one day I overheard Barbatos tell Diavolo that according to Solomon, Zephyr's been experiencing the munchies more frequently, and the pieces fell into place in my head.

Well, all but one: why is this experience different for me? If Zephyr's getting more gluttonous, shouldn't I be, too? Why have I not been consumed by my sin the way the others have?

"You're not good enough."

Its voice calls out to me from within the void I suddenly find myself in. I don't remember nodding off, but maybe I was forced to. Like the others have.

"What?" I ask. A little red demon steps out of the shadows. This must be my spiritual counterpart: No. 6.

"Ever since the day I was born, I've been watching you," it states calmly. "And you, Beelzebub, are truly pathetic."

"Excuse me?!" No. 6 merely laughs.

"I'm the hunger that used to burn inside you. But you've proven yourself unworthy of my services, and so I've found another host." I feel my eyes widening.

"You mean you did this intentionally?" Another laugh, much more raucous than the last.

"Of course! Gods, you're slow!" No. 6 takes a moment to compose itself. "It's not just about food, you know. You have to desire more. My counterpart should want to swallow the world whole with no hesitation, but you're too sentimental and weak." This is beginning to piss me off.

"I won't hurt my brothers."

"And there lies the problem. You put their needs above yours. Avatars aren't supposed to care about others." A brief pause. "Then again, you've always been the most angelic out of everyone, haven't you?"

Instantly, the void transforms into the Celestial Realm. A rather familiar part of it.

"If you hadn't spent so much time debating whose death would affect your so-called brothers the most, you could have saved them both."

"They were too far apart!" The scene quickly materializes around me: angels on opposite ends taking aim at an already-wounded Belphie and Lilith. "I only had time to save one!"

"You can control the wind, can't you? You could have easily used it to bring them closer to you or push the angels away from them." No. 6's grin grows larger, showing off its wicked sharp fangs. "Of course, I would have focused on saving myself. The two of them were dead weight, anyway."

"They were my family!"

"They were poor excuses for angels! I mean, developing such fascination for humans that you end up falling in love with one? They are inferior in every way!"

"Stop it!"

"Not until you accept the truth, Beelzebub! What good has your dear twin been since your arrival here? He's still obsessed over those stupid humans!"

"They're not stupid!"

"Sure they are. The only thing humans are good for is being a vessel for us to control. Free will is an experiment that failed a long time ago. They're little more than sheep, and some of them don't even taste all that great."

"And some of us have horns." Lilith stands up, except she's quickly transforming into something else.

Or rather, someone else.

"You are a conniving son of a bitch, aren't you?" Zephyr continues, fully in their demon form. "You thought you could use me to hurt Beel and get away with it?!" For the first time in this entire encounter, No. 6's demeanor changes. He's no longer confident; he's actually starting to shake as he stammers incoherently.

"I don't want to hear your excuses. You did what you did, and now you must pay the price." Zephyr crouches down, staring intently at No. 6. "I have had all kinds of things in order to satiate this hunger, but none of them have hit the spot. But I think I've just found the perfect meal." Zephyr licks their lips, causing No. 6 to squeak. Turning around, it begins running away, but Zephyr's much faster.

I don't get to see the carnage that they cause, for soon I'm sitting upright, covered in sweat.

"Good. You're awake." A bowl of soup is soon thrust in front of me. "Drink. It'll last you a couple hours."

"Where am I?"

"The castle." Of course. I recognize the servant's uniform now. "I've been assigned to tend to you until you're back to normal." I bring the bowl to my mouth and gently tip it upwards. It's warm, but not hatefully so.

"What about Zephyr?" The servant grimaces slightly.

"They'll be okay. They just have to..." He swallows. "...adjust back to their stomach."

"What do you...oh." The servant softly smiles.

"From what I've heard, it's not pretty. Only those with a strong disposition can be around them right now, and I'm--"

"--not one of those people. Got it." I quickly finish the soup and set the bowl off to the side. "So, how exactly are you supposed to 'tend to me'?"

"Basically, I'm your personal food delivery service. Whatever you're hungry for, I'll get it straight to you."

"And this applies to anything?" The servant nods his head.

"Direct order from the prince himself. All restaurants are on standby. Just one phone call, and they'll prepare whatever your heart desires."

"And they're okay with this?" He shrugs.

"It's all going on the prince's tab. Plus, I've heard he's promised all of them lucrative tips for their efforts."

Taglist: @lost-in-time-wanderer, @fuzztacular, @dianedancer18, @sweetbrier2908, @flare-love, @completelyshatteredbrokenmschf, @thunderlightning351, @l3v1chan, @anxious-chick, @5mary5, @expressionless-fr, @tenkobitch, @budbuddnbuddy

[copiousloverofcopia]

For the ghoul fuckers out there, here is my recent commission for @dantesunbreaker featuring our favorite gremlin, Dew!

Thank you so much for allowing me to write this for you. It was once again a pleasure and thank you for letting me to share it with others as well!

Also once again please be gentle with me I am not the best when it comes to ghoul content, but I am so happy that you all are giving me a change!!!

If you are interested in commissioning me, my carrd info can be found on my pinned post!

Never Change

The upcoming tour has you on edge when your devilish lover Dew decides to create a stir. While he meant no harm, the ghoul's antics only add to your frustration. When things reach their max and you can no longer continue, it's up to Dew to remind you on how to relax.

Also available HERE on AO3!

Definitely NSFW below the cut

Your head was pounding. The dark circles under your eyes, beginning to feel like a permanent fixture on your face and It seemed that as of late that the days grew longer and the nights shorter. You had begun to feel the weight of all the responsibility, you had at one time so willingly taken on. Now taking its toll more than you had ever expected. 

At first you were elated to have even been asked. Working hard for the Ministry to ensure a successful tour for the Impera cycle was something any siblings would be honored to be a part of. There were days, however, when you hardly left the main office. The small room set aside for you, covered in an endless array of paperwork and incomplete itineraries. 

At times it felt like you too were collecting dust, just as the numerous artifacts and forgotten tomes that surrounded you. More often than not, worried that the more you accomplished—the more you still had to get done. The ominous feeling of dread hitting you from the moment your eyes peeled open with the light of the sun. All of it, you often thought, would be a little less infuriating if it hadn’t been for your own personal gremlin—Dew. 

You had fallen for him some time ago—back when you first became selected as a Canon for the Cardinal. A prestigious position within your Italian sect of the Ministry. You were ready to make a name for yourself just when Dew came into your life. Instantly drawing you in with his fiery and unpredictable nature. He was a force to be reckoned with, and he kept you on your toes. 

The excitement between you left you with a sense of meaning—feeling more exhilarated and alive. All of your desires found to be mutual, leading to a romance between the two of you that rivaled that of Antony and Cleopatra. Hot and heavy, it was a wonder you ever got anything done. All of that, however, came crashing down when Cardinal Copia became Papa. 

Your workload tripled overnight and suddenly you had gone from being able to sneak away to an alcove for some steamy afternoon delights, to being stuck behind the same four walls. Working day in and day out for weeks on end. No end in sight until the beginning of the tour. Worst of all, once the Ghost tour started and Copia left, Dew had to go with him.

You had tried not to think about it. Secluding yourself from the rest of the group. Dew, at first doing his best to give you space. At some point however, there was only so much he could give before a ghoul like Dew could no longer contain his natural urges. 

This week was the worst of it. Dew finding new and inventive ways to drive you mad. First was him clawing up the sofa in the office. Leaving behind a trail of threaded up seams and worn down arm rests. He was a glorified cat in his own right, you thought, praying Sister Imperator would not hold you accountable. 

The rest of the week Dew filled with the antics, the likes of an impetuous child. Trying desperately to gain your attention and doing his best to distract you from your responsibilities. Taunting you with the feel of his slick tongue running down the nape of your neck. His claws, grazing at the heat of your sex, all while you were elbow deep in monotonous paperwork.  It took all the power you had inside you to shoo him from the office. The aching he left between your thighs—absolutely torturous. 

You weren’t sure which was worse, the sexual edging or that he finished things off yesterday with a naked roll in the expense reports. Dewdrop, taking advantage of your quick trip to the refectory, to cover the pages in something wet. You, returning to find him amongst the pile of papers, all of them streaked in black ink and fluids. Of which the origins you dare not ask. 

While you had tried to explain, in vain, why it wasn’t the time or the place. No matter how hard you tried you just couldn’t bring yourself to explain it in a way the ghoul would understand. To him it was all fun and games. He was teasing you after all, and if he wasn’t allowed to have you then this was the best way he knew to spend the time. 

Now as you sat at your desk, you waited for the next Dew episode to take place. Feeling the tears pricking at your eyes when the door to the office creaked open. Your scrunkly handsome, mischievous, and smug ghoul wasting no time to step inside. Noticing right away when he walked in, that your face held more than the suggestion of tears.

“Hey babe… what’s got you all?” Dew asked, gesturing over his face with his hands. You let out a sigh, taking in a deep breath in through your nose, before exhaling sharply through pursed lips. Feeling the resolve you had been holding on to, quickly crumbling down. 

“I—I just can’t take it any more Dew.” you told him. Sobbing into your hands as he quickly closed the space between you. 

“Hey, hey, hey peanut. Tell me what’s going on? Are they adding more work for you again?” he asked, ready to throw hands with whatever clergyman had the balls to give you even MORE to do. 

“No, that's not it.” you sniffled. Drying the tears with your sleeve as they fell from your eyes. Dew’s normally grumpy face, turning soft and concerned in their wake. His tail, coming to rest sullenly between his legs.    

“Then… then what is it?” he asked, seeming to be genuinely unaware of what troubled you. The ghoul, bringing himself to sit beside you on your desk. Hopped up along the edge like a wistful kitten, wanting to comfort you. 

“I am overwhelmed, that's true. Sister is on me to finish up all the contracts for the European venues and to top it off I just found out they are adding another date in September that I need to work out the details on and well… frankly Dew,” You paused, deciding to tell him the truth once and for all,”...you are NOT helping.”  

“What? What do you mean?” Dew asked you, feeling a bit blindsided by your comment. Unsure of exactly what you were trying to tell him. 

“I am running on empty. I have so much left to do and all this stuff with you is making the load feel ten times worse. I just wish… I just wish you’d stop with all the crazy while I am trying to work!” you yelled, putting your head down on the desk. The pounding inside of your skull intensified. It was all out in the open now. Dew pressed his lips together, feeling the weight of your words. Wishing he could take back everything he had done the past week.

“Hey…” he began, nudging you with his horns. You carefully lifted your head to meet with his gaze. This time your impish lover was staring back at you with soft, loving eyes. “I’m sorry.”

“Oh?” you asked him, wiping away the remainder of your tears. Dew pulled you into his arms. Wrapping you in them, allowing you to release in his embrace. 

“I’m sorry, I let things get out of hand. I never in a million years wanted to make you unhappy and I surely didn’t want to make you break down.”

“Oh Dew… it’s not just you. I—” 

“No, I know… but I could have done better to make sure you weren’t getting into a bad place. That was also my fault. I promise you that this will never happen again.” he smiled, running his hand over your hair. 

“I don’t want you to change Dew…” you told him. Worried that he might have misinterpreted what you were trying to say. 

“I am not talking about changing who I am, baby. I am talking about not adding more to your plate when you are at max.” he explained, assuring you that your lovable Hellraiser would still be the same ghoul you fell in love with.  

“Good, cause I wouldn’t have you any other way.” you smiled, bringing your lips to his. Feeling the heat rising between you. Your heart, already beating away as the blood went surging through your veins. 

“Promise me something, will you?” he asked. 

“Of course… anything.” you smiled, finding Dewdrop’s look of sincerity–incredibly cute. 

“Never let this happen again, ok? Don’t wait until you are on the edge before you say something to me. Promise me that you will start to take breaks when you need them. You aren’t invincible babe. You need time to ground yourself too.” Dew explained. You nodded in agreement, surprised that such sage words came from such an unlikely source. Clearly his time spent in Copia’s company was rubbing off on him. 

“I promise.” 

“Good. You know, even us ghouls know what it’s like to need a break. I can empathize with you more than you think. The long hours on the road, lack of sleep, the constant needing to bring your A-game. I promise you, the constant burnout will make things harder and you’ll get even less done in the end.” 

“Really?” you said, though you shouldn’t have been surprised. Dew was part of Ghost and had been for some time. Of course, he knew what it was like to live in chaos and like he was running on fumes. 

“Really… so make me a deal. I promise if you start giving yourself the time you need to recoup, then I will stop being such an ass.” Dew winked, “Deal?”

“Deal.” 

“...and you know there is one thing I can do to help you relax—if you’ll let me.” he smirked. Instantly your skin was flooded with goosebumps. Your body, knowing even before he’d made a move EXACTLY what that one thing was. Dew dropped off the edge, turning to lift you up out of your chair onto the desk as he buried his face in your neck. 

Teeth scraping along a delicate spot as he breathed his hot, steaming words of affection against your skin. His claws, gently traveling down your chest to your stomach as he unbuttoned your shirt. Feeling his desire for you growing hard against the inside of your thigh. Already your body, getting wet at the mere suggestion of him.

“I’m gonna show you just how well I can get you to relax baby.” Dew purred as his fingers slid over your zipper—undoing your pants. You hummed in approval, wiggling out of them as fast as you could without losing your position on the desk.  

“Show me… I need you.” you moaned. Chewing on your bottom lip and watching as his deep, piercing eyes fall to the center of your lap. His fingers, finding their way diligently to the wet spot of your underwear. Dew wasted no time teasing it with his digit. Rubbing you there until it was soaked all the way through. 

“That's right baby… that's what I wanna see. I love how fucking wet you get for me.” he growled. Moving now to sink his fingers fully inside you. His fangs, following suit as he bit into your neck. 

“Ah!” you cried out. Reveling in both the pleasure and pain combined between you. Rolling your head from side to side as the sensations overwhelmed you in the best way. Dew began to lick and suck at the bite. Leaving purple marks of ownership behind them. It would be clear to anyone who saw you, that you belonged to him. That he belonged to you. 

As you leaned back on your elbows, Dew lifted up from your neck  to watch as he pushed his fingers carefully past your folds. Licking his lips as he pumped them in and out of your dripping wet pussy. Hungry to taste you more than anything he had ever tasted before. Not satisfied enough just to have watched you squirm.

“You’re so good for me.” he purred again. His thumb, circling over your swollen clit before he began once again dipping his fingers in and out of you. Your hands, wandering over his sleek back and tangling in his long hair, just before you reached his horns. “Fuck.” he groaned, he loved that. Knowing that they allowed you more control—and he was determined to let you use them. Happily guiding his mouth down along your folds.    

“Ah…mmm…” you mewled as Dew dropped down between your legs. His tongue slithering through your wet lips and licking up inside you. Alternating between sucking on your clit and lapping at your folds as he gently worked your insides with his hands. Humming against you as he did it–the vibrations driving you absolutely mad. 

“Mmmm… So... fucking... good.” he moaned, palming his cock with his free hand. You wanted him. Needed him. Knowing that riding that cock and having him knot you was the only thing that could release you from the built-up tension. Your fingers gripped tightly onto his horns.  

“I’m cumming… oh fuck I'm cumming!” you cried as he pressed hard into your g-stop. The sensation of his touch on the soft, velvety tissue—sending your hips up in the air. Dew, smiling against your clit as he felt you cum. Letting you ride out your orgasm on his hand while he delightfully lapped up your fluids. The juices covering his face when he pulled up to kiss you. 

You were breathless and weak as you laid there on the desk. Unsure if you’d ever be able to move again—though you certainly wouldn’t have had it any other way. Your body, still falling from the heights of passion you’d reached when Dew lifted your legs up and over his shoulders. Hastily pulling his throbbing, leaky cock out from the confines of his pants. 

“I think you’re still a bit tense.” he teased, you too blissfully pleasured to even respond. Well at least not with anything coherent. Dew began running the head of his cock up through your slick. Rubbing at your entrance to finish wetting himself before he was ready to slide inside. 

He didn’t need to bother; you were already so needy and ready for him. Your hips rising up against his shaft. Trying hard to guide his cock inside. Begging for him to fill you, to provide you with the friction you so desperately desired between you. Thankfully you hadn’t had to wait long when Dew plowed his way in. 

“Oh, fuck me!” you yelped as he pushed himself in to the hilt. His meaty cock, meeting with the farthest point of you. Dew was only too happy to oblige. Withdrawing backward, just so he could more forcefully pound back into you. You gripped tight to the back of your legs. Dew’s hands placed on either side of you on the desk to help steady himself as he thrusted away. Fucking harder and harder into your tight, little core with every thrust.  

At one point it crossed your mind that you and Dew were most likely fucking on top of the expense reports from that morning. At that moment, however, neither of you cared. Your body, too engrossed in how good it felt to have him inside you. Bucking away as he pressed tight across your walls, filling you so well you could hardly stand it.  

“Dew… I wanna cum… cum with me.” you mewled. Your wanton cries of desperation, making Dew grit his teeth, hoping to hold back his own climax. There was nothing so hot as you begging for him to let you cum. 

“You want me to cum baby? Well, you gotta cum for me first.” he demanded, his tail snaking up your leg and teasing at your asshole. The fluids from your drenched pussy, spilling down over it as it worked its way inside. 

“Ah!” you cried out as his tail entered you. Slowly fucking your ass as Dew continued to fill your pussy to the brim with his cock. You couldn’t barely stand it. Stretched fully inside by him. The sensation made you want to explode. Unable to hold back as your orgasm came ripping through you so fast that you soaked the desk below.

Dew wasn’t satisfied yet. Lifting up and gripping the back of your legs as he pounded harder. His thumb brought back to your clit, continuing to fuck you in both your holes. His tail swirling around inside your ass and pressing up against his cock, from the other side of the thin walls, while he thrusted into you. 

Neither of you could sustain it much longer. The wet sounds of his lap, meeting over and over again with yours, was absolutely salacious. The well earned sweat, dripping down his back as he continued on. His speed, beginning to slow as he grew closer to his own climax. 

It was unmistakable when you felt it. His cock, beginning to swell all around inside. Pressing against all the right nerves as he spread you out, knotting you. His tail, continuing to move in and out. The two of you panting and whimpering as the pressure inside continued to build.  

Finally Dew couldn’t last any longer. Cumming hard into you. Ropes of hot, sticky cum—painting the back of your walls as his tail slipped from your ass. You, beginning to completely unfurl before him when you clamped down on him once again. Tugging tightly to his knot as you felt the force of yourself squirting around him.   

And just like that it was over, Dew collapsing on top of you. More spent than he had ever been before in his life. It seemed that this relaxation session was just as much for him as it was you. You held him against your chest, your breathing beginning to settle. A sense of calm, that was promised to you by your ghoulish lover, taking hold. 

“You see,” Dew began while still panting away, “there is nothing like a good fuck to help you relax.”

“Agreed.” You told him, both of you laughing in one another’s arms. There was nothing more you would ever need, than to be held by those arms. No matter how crazy things got, Dew would always find a way to level with you. Even in times that didn’t involve an overwhelming amount of sweat and cum. 

“Thank you.” you told him. You were finally relaxed for the first time in what felt like forever. Even more so now, knowing that you could come to Dew with your problems. Knowing that you could be honest with him and that it was ok to give yourself grace when you needed it. No matter what he would always be there for you.

“Anytime.” Dew smiled, helping you up from the desk so the two of you could clean yourselves off. Suddenly, as you rose off the desk, a look of concern spread across his face. Accompanied by an even more worrisome nervous grin.

“What?” you asked, not sure you wanted to know the answer as you picked off the stray papers sticking to your back.  

 “Now… don’t get mad, but I think we might have gotten some jizz on Copia’s permit agreement. 

“Dew!” you laughed, giving him a tap to the chest, “Never change.”

[lightlycareless]

Imagine: naoya and y/n have been happily married for years, and y/n has Lesley Gore's "You don't own me" as ringtone because it makes naoya so embarrassed, he would be like "love, I have already apologized 🥺"

PS: love your work, you alone are making justice to naoya's character. Your characterization of him is canon in my mind.

Hello!!!

Awww this is 🥺 man I feel so bad for him haha. But it's true, once everything is healed and nice, this man will still feel that he could never make up for his mistakes 😭 you'd be there to reassure him, though :) ❤️

Anyways, I've decided to apply some creative... differences to this. Mainly because I wanted to get really angsty with it mwahahahahahahah (also, it's not noted here, but there are some things that will remind her of those days, so she will avoid anything that might make her remember that. The two are in love, but... it's a difficult path. but trauma always is.)

Also, thank you so much for your lovely words!! I do try my best :') I'm so glad that you liked my characterization!! This man is capable of more... under the right circumstances 🤭

warnings: a bit of angst. naoya is deeply regretful. you're supportive. mentions of abuse (not really, but something bad is implied)

happy reading!

“—this is why I don’t like going out with you. Nothing ever seems to be of your liking!”

“If you have such a bad time with me, then why don’t you leave?!”

“I might as well!”

Naoya was never one to overhear gossip (coming from strangers, that is.). Thought it to be incredibly boring, dull, mundane, especially from civilians. What could they even experience? Their boring 9-5 job? Yeah, no thanks.

Yet, something about this conversation didn’t elude his attention like it used to, and before he knew it, when he was once focused on your voice, he was now nothing but attentive to the hurtful words of the couple nearby.

They weren’t directed at him, obviously, nor did they refer to anything he could take personally…

But the weight of his past makes it impossible for him to look beyond his own guilt, instinctively attaching their words to his own actions. Like he was the one they were discussing.

Naoya knows he was a… less than desirable man at the beginning of this marriage. He doesn’t claim otherwise, he can’t, since there are still many things to make amends for…

Things that he knows he’ll never be able to; for the atrocities he committed to you… they’re unspeakable. Even with the promise he made to spend of the rest of his life making it up to you, one he doesn’t intend to let go.

But… will he ever amount to it? Can he do so?

…

He’d rather die trying, than never at all.

“Another one?” You ask when he suggests going to another store. The two had come on a date at a shopping mall, intending to pick up some things needed for the apartment, alongside enjoying each other’s company; Naoya’s work had been quite demanding as of lately, and he intended to get his dosage of you, enough to cover a whole month. “But I thought you wanted to head back already…?”

“Yes, but then I thought we’d make the best of our visit here before leaving instead. Who knows when we’ll be back?”

“Oh, well… if that’s what you want…” you frown, a bit unsettled by his sudden change, which was only to worsen.

“No! I mean—we can do that too if you want to.” Naoya interjects.

“You’re not making much sense…”

“What I mean to say is that we can do whatever you want.” He scurries to explain. “Just say the word and I’ll do it.”

“I... don’t have anything in mind, really. Going home sounded good.”

“Are you sure? We can go somewhere else too. You know I have no limitations.”

“I think I’m done for the day—”

“Home it is. Would you like the estate, the apartment, or your parents’ house?”

“My parents house?? But that’s—that’s on the other side of the country!” you gasp; and while you’re always appreciative of Naoya’s willingness to go above and beyond, this was actually a bit… excessive—and that’s saying a lot coming from him!

“And?”

“What do you mean and? We can’t just hop on a plane and leave!”

“Of course we can.” He corrected. “We can leave right now if you want.”

“Again with the—Where did this come from?? Is everything alright, Naoya? What’s gotten into you??”

“Nothing! Is it wrong to want to please you, too?” Naoya frets.

“Too?” you repeat. “What do you mean by that?”

“It’s—It’s nothing. Just tell me what you—”

“No, it is important. It has to be if it’s affecting you like this!” you cry. “Tell me, Naoya. Please. I thought we agreed we could tell each other everything!”

“It’s nothing you don’t know already.”

“Like what?” you frown. “What do I already know?? You’re not making any sense!”

“That I don’t deserve you!” he condemns. “That I’ve done terrible things to you that I can never erase, no matter how much I try—and that perhaps you’d be infinitely happier with someone else; someone… that isn’t me.”

Even with the large, noisy sounds of the lively mall, silence manages to quickly engulf the two soon after, drowning you in the pain Naoya’s unexpected words gave you, piercing your heart and the hope you’ve placed for the future of this relationship.

One created with the notion that everything bad had been left in the past, ready to move on… only to realize, it wasn’t that easy to do so. Suddenly coming back, in the most unwanted, painful way you could’ve imagined—seemingly unprompted, but equally damaging to Naoya’s sentiments.

“That’s… that’s not true.” You eventually murmur, looking at him, while Naoya’s eyes remain glued to the floor. “None of what you’re saying is true.”

Then why do I keep feeling this way?

“… you don’t… believe that… do you?” You continue, managing to get a glimpse of his face, which reflected nothing but sadness and disbelief towards your words.

“It seems like all I do is hurt you.” Naoya laments. “No matter how much I try, I’ll never be able to escape—"

“Don’t say that—that’s not who you are.” You interject, stepping closer to him. “We’ve come a long way from where we began, you’re not that same man from before.”

“But I keep making the same mistakes, I keep hurting you.”

“It’s not easy to leave behind what you thought normal for all your life—or to accept them as mistakes…” you take his hand. “So, when you do fall back into your old ways, but bounce back right up… It shows you’re trying. It shows you’re regretful and want to do better.”

“I don’t want to hurt you anymore.”

“I know.” He lifts your gaze to yours; you place your other hand just above his cheek, giving him a soft smile. “And… I know you don’t do it intentionally. I’ve seen your heart, the pain you went through and how it affected you. But I also saw what you’re capable of, the love you’ve harbored, how you longed to share it, and… how lucky I am to be the one to earn it.”

“…I’m the lucky one.” Naoya leans into your touch. “To have found a wife so compassionate…”

“We’ve both done things we’re… not proud of. But that doesn’t mean we’re eternally bound to them. As long as we’re regretful and strive to do better… it’s all that matters.”

“But when is enough?” Naoya murmurs. “When will I stop feeling like this?”

“I don’t know. There are some things we can’t stop, we simply… learn how to live with them.” You admit. “I wish it was possible.”

He frowns, looking away.

“But I do know one thing, though.”

“…What is it?”

“That I love you. With your faults and virtues—and everything in between. Is what makes you, you, Naoya.” You giggle, he gives you a tight smile. “And I’ll spend my whole life telling you that until you believe it yourself!”

He chuckles; seems that both have made lifelong promises that neither intends to forget anytime soon.

“I love you too.” Naoya professed. “Thank you for everything. You’ve given me so much, probably even more than what I deserved—that I’ll spend my whole life making it up to you.”

“You don’t have to, Naoya. You only deserve more.” You reassure him. “But really, you don’t need to make it up to me! As long as you remember the love we have for each other, and that I’ve long forgiven you, is enough for me.”

At your words, the tears Naoya was trying his best to hold back finally slide down his cheeks, which you quickly wipe away with your thumbs, before giving him a smile and pulling him closer for a peck on the lips.

“Everything is going to be fine.” You promised, he looks back at you. You kiss him again, taking him into your arms and hugging him. “If you don’t mind me asking, however… what happened that made you feel this way? Did I do something?”

Naoya sighs, resting his chin on the top of your head.

“No, never. It was just something stupid, actually. Some people arguing, that’s all.”

“Oh.” You blink, quickly understanding why he’d feel insecure about your relationship; the familiarities were too close for comfort. “That’s… unfortunate.”

“It reminded me of how we used to be… how I’d treat you.”

“That is long gone. We’ve worked past that and now, we’re in a much better place.” You snuggle against him. “Both figuratively and literally.”

“Do you still want to go home?”

“Yeah, all this shopping made me tired. Unless there’s something else you wanted to see?”

“No, I was mostly suggesting things for you. I’ve been feeling tired for a while too, now.”

“We can arrange something else for another day, then. For now, I just want to head back home, lay on the futon, cuddle underneath the covers, and maybe watch a movie… how does that sound?” you grin. “I can even prepare some popcorn, if you’d like!”

He chuckles.

“It sounds wonderful.”

Just like his new life with you. Something he never thought he’d receive, nor deserved, at least in the beginning of his marriage.

Until you proved to him otherwise, showing him that the ways of his clan, those forcefully imposed on him, didn’t determine who he was, who he could become.

That he had much more power over his life, the ultimate decision on what to do remained on him and no one else.

It was to be a difficult path, one promising bumpy roads, which will probably never end if he were to be realistic…

But it’s just as you said. As long as both know, deep inside, that they’re doing their best to overcome these obstacles, as well as remembering that they’re always there for the other, alongside their ever-growing love… nothing else mattered.

It was you and Naoya against the world.

And he wouldn’t want it any other way.

🥺 I believe Naoya will always feel undeserving, even when they have a kid together and whatnot. He comes from a very difficult family, so be prepared to face these kinds of situations when in a relationship with him 😭😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️

omg i can imagine it already, when he's super old, reflecting on his life he had alongside you, his kids, and probably grandchildren too... only then will he finally admit he's happy with the life he had. jfc i'm crying goodbye.

Anyways, I know I deviated a bit from your imagine, but I still hope it was to your liking! the angst between the two is real, but so good too....

As always, thank you so much for sending in this! Take care, and hope to see you soon!!

[infernal-house-demon]

Hey, so for anyone thinking about starting T, I know there’s a lot of info and warnings about side effects to consider, but it also really helps to hear from actual trans folks too! It felt super intimidating to me when I started but it’s been great so far. I’ll share the changes I’ve seen after one month under the cut for anyone who is interested! (For reference I’m on the lowest dose of the gel)

First change I noticed was my smell! I wouldn’t say my BO is worse or anything, I just smell a lot different when I sweat and I do find myself sweating a bit more

Fat redistribution! It’s very subtle so far but my face is definitely changing. My cheeks are less round and my chin is a bit more defined. I can’t tell as much with the rest of my body bc I wasn’t that curvy to start with

On the note of fat redistribution, I’ve actually lost some weight. This is probably far more specific to me and genetic factors but it is something I’ve noticed.

Attraction. I’m still very much bisexual and into women and non-binary people, but my attraction to men has skyrocketed. Especially like big, burly, hairy men. That or femboys, there’s no inbetween lol.

In general starting to find masculine qualities a lot more desirable. Considering getting a packer which is not something I thought I would like before. I think the act of transitioning is allowing me to open my mind more to what I want.

Sex drive. Holy shit this is the biggest change. They are not joking about the T horniness. It can be quite distracting at times which is really the only downside I’ve experienced. Even still, I prefer how I feel now to how I did before.

Slightly more breakouts. They warned me about seeing acne in the first few months, but honestly I don’t feel like it’s been that bad. Plus it’s a little affirming because it means the hormones are working! Again this is one that’s probably specific to me

Assertiveness. I know they warn you about the potential of becoming more aggressive, but as my doctors told me, it’s actually more that you have a lower tolerance for bullshit. Obviously if you do become genuinely aggressive/very angry you should get your dose adjusted. But for me it’s just been making me slowly more assertive in a way I like. It does mean I occasionally have to hold my tongue about things so I don’t say something I’ll regret. But this has been a huge plus for me overall.

Mood/crying. I would say my mood has been better overall. Probably because I feel very affirmed in my gender as I start to change. I also have moved out of my parents’ place and am living on my own so I imagine that has helped too. I’ve heard some people say they can’t cry as much and I have experienced a bit of that. When I’m reading or watching something my eyes might well up but they don’t roll tears. The only time I’ve cried since I started on it was when I injured myself (unrelated) and had a panic attack. But I can’t say for sure if it’s the T or it’s just that I am happier and have better coping skills than I used to. I will say it’s not my immediate stress response anymore, but I don’t feel like my emotions are pent up or anything.

Voice. This one is hard to say for sure because I had a cold recently that opened up my chest register a little more. Any changes are very subtle so far but I do find my resting pitch seems lower than when I started (I’ve been trying to do those “this is my voice day x on T” videos to track it. I’m terrible at remembering)

Cycle. My period has been coming a bit later each month and the pain seems to be getting a bit less intense. Again this one will be very specific to the user.

Bottom growth. Only a very very small amount. I only noticed because I was watching for it. What I’ve experienced more so is increased sensitivity which I feel is a positive.

Most importantly: I’ve been very very happy! I get occasional dysphoria but oftentimes when I look in the mirror I just smile because I can see myself becoming who I want. I feel more confident, I feel hot, and I really truly love myself through each step of the journey.

Obviously there’s a lot to consider, but if you feel like it could be something you want to try and your health is in a place where you can do so, do it! I am lucky to have a great clinic working with me who were very informative (and helped me apply for coverage when I didn’t have insurance!). I’m happy to pass along any online resources they’ve sent me if anyone is interested. Remember, you can always stop if you decide it’s not right for you or you’ve achieved the changes you want to see. It’s a personal journey and it’s entirely up to you. I found it all overwhelming when I was first considering it and I wish I would have had more people to talk to about what it really feels like. Hopefully this can help demystify it for anyone who is curious about what it’s like. We all deserve to craft ourselves into the person we want to be. 🏳️‍⚧️

[divine-misfortune]

17 with phantom, rain, and dew? 👉👈

Slick and wet, the sound of a desperate paced desire pervaded the air. The associated scent surely hung thick, musk and something faintly metallic. Nothing about it was discreet, not that they were trying to be - Rain hardly ever cared to be, and Phantom wasn't capable of it. 

He tried in vain to muffle himself; hand clamped over his mouth, breathing heavily through his nose, eyes rolled back as he cants his hips forward. 

Rain's eyes also roll, but in sheer annoyance. He sneered and dug his heel into the other ghoul's lower back.

"Do you plan on fucking me like you mean it or are you going to keep wasting my time?" He propped himself up enough to grab his wrist and drag it into place on the other side of his waist. "You wanted my attention so badly, work to keep it or I'll find someone who can." 

“I can do it, I can I promise-” he panted and shifted the way his hands sat on him, holding tightly like Rain’s disappointment might drive him from beneath him. 

Phantom's thumbs dug into the valley between his hip bones as he thrust into him again. Less hesitant than he had been. More eager to please than anything, surely emboldened by the water ghoul's threats, he pinned him in place on the desk and fucked into him in earnest. Rain wondered if he could feel the way his dick stretched him with every thrust beneath his thumbs. He wasn’t large by any means, but that didn’t change just how perfectly he filled him, how he could feel him in the deepest parts of himself. 

"Fucking finally-!" Rain's head thumped lightly against the wood with a particularly rough snap of his hips, his sigh cut short. Gasping as the blunt head of his cock nudged at a bed of nerves. 

His body tensed, walls bearing down in approval that Rain wouldn't waste the oxygen in saying.

Phantom groaned, purple eyes fixed on the place their bodies met. Enamored by the way his cock splitting the water ghoul open made Rain’s engorged clit visibly twitch. Dusky pink and jutting out from between his slick folds. Rain let his palm slide over his belly, following the dark and coarse hair that trailed south, graciously spreading his lips to give him a proper look at it. He choked, his pace coming to stutter slightly as he chewed at his lower lip. 

Rain bit the inside of his cheek, the urge to smile in self satisfaction threatening to give him away entirely. Phantom's fascination was near enough worship for him.

Like the simple gasp was all the encouragement he needed, Phantom took to a quick pace, abusing the angle that seemed to force every pleasured sound Rain was capable of making out of him. Without verbal praise he sought out a more physical variety, and every clench of heat around him was reward enough.

Tossing his head to move the hair from his eyes, Phantom lifted his gaze briefly and abruptly froze like a deer in headlights. 

"You finally figured out how to make yourself useful, why in the seven hells did you stop?!" Rain snapped, somewhere between a hiss and a sob. 

"So this is where you've been?" 

Rain's brow furrowed as he tipped his head back, an awkward arch, unintentionally baring his throat to the one above him. In the doorway an upside down fire ghoul, the dim light of the office space emphasizing the orange burn in his narrowed eyes. 

"Droplet," he purred easily and felt Phantom's cock pulse inside him, still buried deep. He smiled and Dew's frown turned into a full blown scowl. 

"Are you fucking kidding me?" He practically growled and Rain rolled his eyes. “You ditched me to go fuck the newbie? Couldn’t keep it in your pants for a few hours?” 

Above him, Phantom stammered. Caught on a syllable with all the grace of a kid caught elbow deep in the cookie jar, Rain wasn’t sure if he was trying to make excuses or apologize. Dew took a step forward, the old wooden floors creaking obnoxiously under his weight, and Phantom flinched like his gaze alone was enough to burn him. Rain seized both of his wrists when he moved to withdraw. Just the inch he’d managed to pull out of him was too much for Rain’s liking. Phantom had carved a space out inside of him, and without him his body felt painfully empty, and he would never admit that out loud.

He hauled his hands back into place like they belonged there to begin with.

“I didn’t tell you to stop, baby bat,” Rain warned though his tone held all the sweetness as a spoonful of cough syrup, and Phantom blinked wide eyed and confused. Whiplash rattling around behind his semi glassy eyes. “Don’t get shy on me now, you were doing so well.” 

It was clear from the way his face twisted that something ugly and jealous simmered in Dew the longer he stood there, the longer he watched. Rain watched, almost gleefully, as his mate ran his tongue over his teeth and clenched his fists at his sides. Barely tempered irritation came with the faintest scent of gasoline. 

He dragged Phantom close with a heavy hand on the back of his neck, nipping lightly at his earlobe before the little ghoul instinctively hid against his neck. Thin fingers tangled into his dark hair, the quintessence ghoul gave an experimental roll of his hips and let out a shuddered sigh. 

A twitch in Dew’s face. Rain’s smile was certainly wicked, he knew exactly what he was doing. He often did. 

“Let him watch,” he breathed softly into his mussed up hair and Phantom nodded with the faintest whimper. Pleasure and pride mingled in his belly. “Want him to see just how good you are for me, how you fuck me…Show him how high my standards are.” 

Rain didn’t even try to swallow back the sound Phantom managed to punch out of him when he fucked back into him, hard enough to jolt his entire body forward. Insult to injury. Fuel to a fire.

He also didn’t bother to look back at Dew. Knowing full well that even as his fire ghoul steamed and growled somewhere low in his chest, he’d consciously made the decision to remain, to watch, to blatantly pretend his cock wasn’t fattening up in his jeans. 

He could already feel the scalding hands around his throat. The bruises Phantom would leave on his hips would be nothing compared to the welts Dew was bound to gift him in kind. 

[sunsetshifting]

How I Format My Scripts (With Pictures!)

Scripts are, for all intents and purposes, the roadmap for your desired/intended reality!

Before I get into the nitty-gritty of things, I have a few things I want you to remember:

You are not CREATING the reality, you’re LOCATING it, so don’t feel bad about scripting things that seem a little overdramatic or ‘wattpad-y’. YOU are going to be the only person who knows that it was anything less than sheer coincidence, so don’t worry about it.

You are able and allowed to change your height, weight, build, gender, whatever. You are NOT obligated to look like your OR self.

You can be as specific or as vague as you want!

As a note, my scripts are modeled after shifting youtuber Cass Relf’s scripts, so for more details and ideas, I recommend watching this video! Things to include in your shifting script! - YouTube) Like her, this scripting explanation is made with Notion (a free software) in mind, but you can use any software you please!

Now that that’s out of the way, we’ll cover the categories of what one might include in their script, as well as display my own ‘Obey Me!’ script as an example!

.

Menu

I enjoy having an overarching page that display all the subpages related to my script, hence, the dedicated ‘Menu’. This is not necessary, I just find it helpful. (Additionally, I find it helps to ‘set the mood’ for the rest of the scripting.) (The icons you choose don’t matter)

.

Script

This is where you put your main affirmations, as well as instructions that are immediately relevant to when you arrive in your DR. You do NOT have to lay out the rules or lore of your DR here, as there will be a section for that later. This section can be as long or short as you want! Typically, I use this section to dictate where, when, and how I awaken in the DR.

.

Character Details

This section is self-explanatory in some ways, but deceptively complicated in others! The ‘character details’ section is where one should lay out descriptions of the ‘important’ figures in their DR (including yourself!) These descriptions typically include name, nicknames, age, height, a physical description, a personality description, and a misc. ‘notes’ section (Seen below)

Depending on the content of your DR, you may need to add or remove certain sections for these character pages! For example, in a MHA DR, you might want to include what class (or agency/organization) someone is involved with, or describe their quirk on its own! Don’t be afraid to experiment!

If something is important to include, but doesn’t fit into any of the aforementioned categories, a ‘Notes’ section at the end will be useful for you!

(Special note! If you’re making your own page, I suggest replacing your ‘personality’ section with a ‘backstory’ section, just so you can elaborate on your DR self’s background. As well, I personally put the vast majority of my abilities/interesting notes in the ‘notes’ section. Due to the sheer volume of DRs I have, I’ve found it helpful to create a ‘basics’ page that I can reference across Notion teamspaces/pages. This is not necessary, however, if you’re fine copy/pasting or simply don’t have much overlap between DR selves!)

My ‘Basics’ tab is also split into sections, though all within the same document! The categories are: Appearance/Body, Abilities, Social, Tech-Related, Safety, and Misc.. These are all fairly self-explanatory.

.

Character Styles

This section isn’t necessary, but it helps to flesh out your DR in your mind. It also adds a good spot to specify the sorts of clothes you want in your closet, or another person’s clothing habits.

Typically, I go on Pinterest to find cute outfits and simply paste photos of them into the page, though there are sometimes canonical sources you can go to for finding photos for people’s outfits!

(Careful on this front for Notion, as you can only paste in so many images before hitting a limit! Same for pages.)

.

Diary

This section can be used for a variety of things, but I personally use it to catalogue shifting attempts for this specific DR. It is helpful to record what does and does not work for you. Additionally, you can use it to write down what you’re most excited to do in your DR, things you’re scared of in your DR, and so on and so forth.

.

Visual Inspiration

Arguably one of the most fun sections, ‘visual inspiration’ is where you can put photos or reference images for some of the places you’re planning on visiting! Videos and drawings are also applicable~!

Personally, I split it into a menu page of all the locations and then subpages of each location, but you don’t have to!

(Different angles help to visualize things, but aren’t strictly necessary!)

.

About My Desired Reality

This is the portion wherein you describe certain aspects of your Desired Reality! You don’t have to explain the entire plot, or even the broad strokes of it, as the multiverse (as well as your subconscious) already know where you want to go. Still, this is a good spot to specify the date once again, specify the specific iteration if you’re shifting to someplace with variations (such as specifying if you’re shifting to the movie or book version of someplace), and other important notes that pertain to the world at large rather than a single character (but don’t count as ‘rules’.)

Additionally, if you want to specify a specific plot you want the DR to follow, you can write that here (I, of course, put it in another sub menu at the bottom.) You can be as vague as ‘it follows the plot of the show’ to explicitly plotting out each ‘episode’ of events.

.

DR Rules

This is where the basic ‘rules’ of your DR go. This is where most people put their safety precautions, such as stating that they cannot die, that you can shift effortlessly in and out of the DR, and so on and so forth.

You can also put slightly more specific rules surrounding certain characters here (or on their character detail page, it does not matter.)

.

Scenarios

The final and most fun part of scripting! ‘Scenarios’ are events that you plan to happen in your DR. Unless you remove them, they will eventually occur, so be certain that you truly want whatever you’re scripting. As you could already guess by this point, they can be as vague or specific as you’d like!

.

WHEW, okay, that was a lot. Thank you for reading till the end! Happy Shifting!

[mini-sae]

Hi everyone ! I wanted to thank you for reading me. I hope you enjoy my little stories.

I'm french, so I apologize if I make some mistakes.

And I wanted to tell you that I'm open to requests. If there is something you would like me to write, I'll do my best.

Hope you'll enjoy this new one !

More to love :

It was the little things, but he noticed.

You were still so loving to him. So kind. So inviting. But recently, you were shying away and he hurted more that he dared to admit.

When you two were in bed, you were quick to put the cover on you too. And besides in bed and in the shower, you didn't walk around naked in his or your place anymore.

You were wearing less dresses and more pants. Not that he found you any less desirable. You were the most precious, beautiful thing he laid eyes on.

At first, he thought that it was one of your many moodswings. You were changing, and it never crashed to surprise and delight him. But it got worse and worse. And of course, he took it personally.

- Ok sweetheart. Tell me what's wrong. - He asked while caressing your hair.

You look at him with wide eyes.

- Sorry ?

- Something is wrong with you lately. What is it ?

- What do you mean ?

He pinched the bridge of his nose. You two were past this. You trusted each other with everything. You knew everything about each other. Everything. The good, the bad and the worst.

- Please Y/N. It's like you're hiding from me. Did I do or say something wrong ?

What were you hiding ? You had no secrets for him. He made sure of that after he told all about his.

You sighed and looked away. Of course he would notice. He was just too thoughtful to say anything.

- Please don't pretend you don't see it. I'll be more careful from now on.

He looks baffled.

- Baby, I don't understand. See what ?

You roll your eyes.

- Don't do that. You know I don't like that. - He said, pointing a finger at you.

- Okay.

You take a deep breath.

- I know I gained some weight. You know how anxious I was these last few weeks. But I...

- Whoah whoah. What are you talking about ? Your weight ?

- Yes.

You answered as if it was obvious.

He suddenly laughed. A real laugh.

- Of course I noticed. But what's the problem ?

- Well...

You didn't know what to say. He didn't seem to be bothered by your new curves. He was still worshiping you every day and every night. But you thought that was only because he didn't want to offend you.

Realization hits him. He cups your in his hands and kiss you softly on your forehead.

- I love your body, babygirl. I love that I have more to kiss. More to love.

He caught you off guard with a feverish kiss. His hands suddenly on your hips, squeezing you possessively.

- You're the most beautiful creature I've ever seen.

You smile so much that it hurts.

[hijitae]

Last question and I’ll leave you alone for a bit(I don’t want to come off as a nuisance) so what are your favorite headcannons for this paring

My apologies once again for the long delay. Thank you for the question -- you are helping to keep the fandom active!

Some of my headcanons below might be repeats, but that's just because I like them that much. I went with five for now.

ONE: Tae loves that Hijikata is making a legit effort to talk to Shinpachi, even if it's just commenting on the weather or a greeting when passing each other on the streets. Of course, Hijikata does it with a very non-expressive tone, almost as if it's an operation he must daily conduct -- and he does it for Tae's sake because he knows how close they are and how important it is to her that he get along with her brother. It weirds Shinpachi out for quite a while, but he tries to engage in more conversation with Hijikata, who feels awkward to discuss anything past battle strategy or mayonnaise. But they do seem to bond over discussing how to run their respective organizations (Shinpachi's is the Otsuu Fan Club, naturally), even if they bicker about what methods are best. Seeing them talk to each other makes Tae happy, and that's what Hijikata cares about the most.

TWO: Speaking of mayonnaise, Tae at first finds Hijikata's mayo obsession eccentric, although not any stranger than other people's habits and obsessions within her social circle. Gradually, it becomes less eccentric to her and more of a thing she finds cute and adores him for. It inspires her to not only keep mayonnaise well-stocked at home but also to learn new recipes that include mayonnaise. This is what helps to improve her cooking skills, although her signature style still prevails now and then. Luckily, Hijikata builds up an immunity because he always uses mayonnaise on the meals that come out questionable. As a result, mayonnaise becomes a symbol of love between them that nobody else can understand. Tae is pleased that he's one of the extreme few who won't complain about her cooking, and Hijikata feels he's in paradise with her adding mayonnaise to the menu on the regular.

THREE: In a Dekobokko-ish AU where their genders are reversed, Tae becomes Taichi and Hijikata becomes Tenko. One of the things I wished I could've seen from the original arc was Tae's male counterpart (fortunately, there's some great fanart of the possibilities).

Anyway, Taichi works at a host club where he’s a popular “samurai era” host request; of course, he’s working to save enough money to rebuild the dojo and support his younger sister, Pachie. Goriko always drags Tenko along for a night out with Goriko, naturally, crushing on Taichi. Tenko doesn’t understand Goriko or the host club world, and is only there to make sure Goriko doesn’t drink too much or get into some kind of mishap. Taichi usually rebuffs Goriko’s attempts at flirting and asking Taichi out, finding that she comes on too strong. Instead, Taichi finds himself interested in Goriko’s friend, who keeps coming to the club despite having a clear distaste for his line of work. Tenko, who is used to being mocked for her weight and her strait-laced attitude, is confused by Taichi’s courteous ways to her despite having a sharp tongue when they argue about Goriko. Taichi likes Tenko’s skill with a sword and finds her aloof attitude charming. Tenko reluctantly admits Taichi isn’t a bad guy and commends his desire to keep swordsmanship alive in the new era.

Anyway, this and that happens, and Taichi and Tenko end up together and live happily ever after! Tenko marries into the Shimura family and becomes an instructor at the dojo, balancing that and her law enforcement career. Taichi successfully restores the dojo, quits his host club job, and becomes the dojo master. Eventually, they have a daughter named Tomoko (you know, instead of a son named Togoro, haha).

FOUR: Back to the regular universe for this one. Hijikata changes his patrol schedule to nights when Tae is working a late shift. He’s not always available to walk her home, but he feels better knowing that he’s awake around the same time just in the interest of her safety at night, even if he knows she has taken care of herself for a long time. Tae doesn’t mind; she feels happy that he cares so much. Sometimes their schedules differ, and she worries about him, too, when he’s called to dangerous cases or operations. She keeps herself busy during those times until she hears back from him, and only then will she breathe a sigh of relief.

FIVE: They often talk late at night, whether it’s while walking home from work, on the phone, or when neither is working and Hijikata just drops in, and they’ll talk quietly – about their day, about the future, about anything. Hijikata isn’t used to such private conversation with someone like this, but he finds it relaxing and starts getting used to such a routine. Tae loves it because it feels like she can really connect with him, that they are growing closer. It’s more intimate, free from prying eyes and gossip. Hijikata grows more comfortable with physical affection, and Tae feels elated over knowing this side of him that no one else can see. On one such nights, under the moonlight, they share their first kiss. Eventually, Tae doesn’t want him to go and Hijikata doesn’t want to leave.

--

I felt kind of sappy in writing some of these headcanon ideas, but who cares – fanfic, headcanons, and fanart is largely about self-indulgence, lol. Anyway, hope you enjoyed them!

[msilwrites]

Sequel to: ASCENT - Defying Desire (ODD WOMEN Series) a 3AM update - FIVE

A/N: Well, I’ve got some ideas, so... why not? Well, here we are with a chapter that delves into the backgrounds of our characters, Kieran and Sage. It's an opportunity for us to get to know them better. Oh, and a quick spoiler alert for those who have read "DARK KNIGHT" - keep an eye out for a familiar moment when you reach that part in the story. Enjoy the chapter! Defying Desire

FIVE

Sage paced back and forth in her living room, her mind consumed with regret. The events of the evening replayed in her thoughts, and she couldn't shake off the feeling that she had made a mistake. She had let fear and uncertainty guide her actions, and now she found herself questioning her choices.

As her mind raced, a flashback took her back to the night she had spent with Kieran. They had shared a delightful evening together, filled with laughter, genuine conversation, and a connection that seemed to grow stronger with each passing moment. But when the night drew to a close, Kieran had made it clear that he wanted to date her, not rush into a physical relationship.

Sage, being the self-doubting person she was, had let her insecurities take hold. She didn't want Kieran to see her vulnerabilities, to witness her true self. And so, with a mix of cowardice and misguided intentions, she had asked Kieran's driver to drop her off in front of a townhouse a few blocks away from her actual home.

In her heart, she knew it was a foolish decision. Why had she pretended that her home was closer than it actually was? Perhaps it was her fear of being seen for who she truly was, her fear of letting someone into her life and revealing her flaws. She hadn't even given Kieran her business card or phone number, only her name.

Now, in the solitude of her home, regret gnawed at her. She realized that she might have missed an opportunity to let someone in, to explore a potential connection with a remarkable man like Kieran. The weight of her decision settled heavily upon her shoulders, and she couldn't help but wonder what could have been if she had been braver, more open to the possibilities.

But then Sage's thoughts took a sharp turn, and she couldn't help but entertain a different perspective. She reminded herself of the similarities between Kieran and some of her previous partners. They had all started off nice and charming, just like Kieran. They had charmed her, made her feel special, and convinced her to let her guard down. But as soon as they had her wrapped around their finger, things had changed.

They had taken advantage of her, using her issues against her and blaming her for their own shortcomings. Sage had endured enough heartache and pain, and she couldn't bear the thought of going through it all over again.

"No," she said defiantly, shaking her head. "I've had my fair share of manipulative men. I won't let Kieran be another one. I refuse to let myself be hurt again."

With newfound conviction, Sage made a promise to herself. She would no longer allow herself to be fooled by superficial charm or fall into the same patterns of toxic relationships. She was stronger now, more aware of her own worth, and she wouldn't settle for anything less than genuine love and respect.

As she walked through her living room, a sense of empowerment washed over her. She realized that she didn't need a man to complete her. She had her own strength, her own dreams, and her own happiness to pursue.  However, now she faced a new predicament: how to avoid Kieran?

---------- 

On Thursday night, Sage walked into her favorite lounge bar, relieved to see that Kieran wasn't there. She had made a mental note of the days when he usually frequented the place, trying her best to avoid any chance encounters. With a friendly smile, she greeted the bartender and ordered her usual drink along with some delectable canapés. It was a small victory, knowing she could enjoy her evening without the presence of the intriguing but potentially complicated Kieran.

Tonight, Sage had no intention of indulging in flirtatious encounters with handsome strangers. She had opted for a more understated yet elegant look, wearing a black maxi dress adorned with subtle gold jewelry. Her attire was tasteful and presentable, but it lacked the sultriness of the outfit she had worn on the day she made her bold move on Kieran. She was determined to enjoy a quiet and uneventful evening, savoring her drink and canapés in peace.

Tonight, she had no plans of flirting with handsome strangers, so she was dressed in a black maxi dress and gold jewelry. It was tasteful and presentable, exuding an air of sophistication rather than sultriness, unlike the outfit she had worn on the day she made her move on Kieran.

Sage made her way to the lounge bar and greeted the bartender, Finn. He flashed her a friendly smile as he prepared her usual drink and canapés.

"So, Sage, how did your date with Kieran go?" Finn asked curiously, his eyes twinkling with intrigue.

Sage sighed, a hint of regret in her voice. "Oh, Finn, I was a coward. I ran away."

Finn raised an eyebrow, genuinely interested. "Why on earth would you do that?"

Sage took a moment to collect her thoughts. "I don't know, Finn. It's complicated. I let my fears and insecurities get the best of me. I didn't want to let someone in, only to get hurt again."

Finn nodded empathetically, understanding the struggle all too well. "Sometimes, self-preservation kicks in, and it's hard to let down those walls. But who knows, Sage? Maybe you'll have another chance with him."

Sage chuckled softly, a tinge of skepticism in her voice. "I highly doubt it. I think I may have missed my chance. Besides, I'm not sure I'm ready to navigate those waters again."

Finn leaned against the bar, a thoughtful expression on his face. "Well, you never know what life has in store for you. Maybe fate will intervene and give you a second shot."

Sage smiled appreciatively at Finn's words. "Maybe, Finn. Maybe." 

Just as Finn finished speaking, his smile grew wide, and he pointed discreetly behind Sage. "Like probably right now?!" 

Sage turned around, her eyes widening in surprise. There, behind her, was Kieran, a mischievous smile playing on his lips. He sits down next to her, not breaking eye contact. 

Kieran's eyes sparkled with amusement as he took a seat next to Sage. "Well, well, well, if it isn't the elusive Sage Lennox who disappeared into thin air after our incredible evening together. I must say, I didn't expect you to be a master of vanishing acts."

Sage's cheeks flushed with embarrassment as she tried to muster a retort. "I... I wasn't. I just... had something urgent to attend to."

Kieran raised an eyebrow, clearly unconvinced. "Urgent, huh? Is that what they call running away these days?"

Sage shifted uncomfortably in her seat, a sheepish smile forming on her lips. "I wouldn't call it running away, Kieran. More like a strategic retreat."

Kieran raised an eyebrow, feigning surprise. "Ah, a strategic retreat, you say? Care to enlighten me on the grand strategy behind that?"

Sage's cheeks flushed with embarrassment as she fidgeted with her drink. "I'm really sorry, Kieran. I didn't mean to run off like that. It was... um, cowardly of me."

Kieran's teasing smile softened into a gentle expression. "No need to apologize. We all have our moments of uncertainty. I hope I didn't give you the wrong impression."

Sage shook her head, her eyes filled with sincerity. "No, not at all. It's not about you. It's about me and my own fears. I didn't want to let anyone in too quickly."

“We all have our moments of uncertainty. But sometimes, taking a leap of faith can lead to something beautiful. I'd like to get to know the real you, if you're willing to give it a chance." He offers

Sage mustered up the courage to meet Kieran's gaze, her curiosity piqued. "And how exactly would you suggest we get to know each other better?"

"Well, Sage, I was thinking of inviting you to my residence. I have quite an impressive collection of books, art, sculptures, and other intriguing things I've gathered from my travels."

Sage couldn't resist the opportunity for a playful tease. She leaned in, a sly smile forming on her lips. "Oh, so you're finally trying to seduce me, huh? Inviting me over for a private tour, just the two of us?"

Kieran chuckled, catching on to her playful banter. "Oh, Sage, you have quite the imagination. I assure you, my invitation is simply for a chance to get to know you better and share some interesting experiences. No hidden agendas, I promise."

Sage's cheeks flushed slightly as she realized her assumption had taken a humorous turn. "Well, in that case, perhaps we can save the private tour for another day. You see, I happen to be in my period at the moment," she said, her voice laced with playful skepticism, "unless you happen to have a secret taste for the bloody, like Hannibal Lecter."

Kieran burst into laughter, finding her innuendo amusing. "Oh, Sage, you always know how to keep things interesting. But I assure you again, it's just a regular tour. No hidden agendas or secret tastes for the bloody."

Sage raised an eyebrow, not fully convinced. "Are you sure? Because I've seen enough movies to know that sometimes a 'regular tour' is just code for something else."

Kieran chuckled, his eyes twinkling with amusement. "I understand your concern, but I genuinely meant it as a chance for us to spend time together and get to know each other better. No ulterior motives, I promise."

Sage's playful skepticism started to fade, replaced by a growing curiosity. "Well, if you insist.”

Kieran's smile widened, a mischievous glint in his eyes. " And you know what, Sage? I happen to have an abundance of gelato at my place. My daughter left for a business trip and I'm left with all these tubs. So, if you decide to join me on the tour, I'll make sure to treat you to some indulgent gelato. It's the perfect remedy for any period-induced cravings."

Sage's eyes lit up, a playful smirk on her face. "Well, Kieran, how can a girl say no to gelato? Lead the way, and let's see if your claim lives up to the hype."

Sage smiled back at Finn, the bartender, appreciating his encouragement and support. With newfound confidence and a touch of excitement, she linked her arm with Kieran's, accepting his gallant gesture.

---------- 

As Kieran and Sage stepped outside the lounge bar, a cool evening breeze brushed against their faces. The sight of Sage and Kieran greeting his chauffeur, standing by the open door of a sleek black Rolls Royce, immediately caught the attention of Henry, Alex, and James, who happened to be walking along the street, and was out to after a long day at work, to unwind and grab a drink at their favorite pub.

 Henry's heart skipped a beat at the unexpected encounter. He hadn't expected to see her, especially not in the company of someone like Kieran.

Alex's eyes widened in recognition, and he exchanged a knowing glance with James. They both remembered seeing Sage and Kieran together at a posh restaurant just a week ago. The memory sparked a mischievous grin on their faces, as if they were privy to some hidden secret.

Henry's gaze fixated on Sage, a mixture of surprise and jealousy flickering in his eyes. He couldn't deny the pang of envy that washed over him as he observed the ease with which Kieran interacted with her. It was as if they were old friends, or perhaps even more.

Alex nudged Henry, a mischievous grin on his face. "Looks like our dear Sage has found herself quite the intriguing companion."

James placed a hand on Henry's shoulder, attempting to offer some comfort. "Mate, I know it stings, but try not to let it get to you. Sage has the right to move on, just like we do."

Henry shrugged off Alex's hand, his voice laced with bitterness. "Move on? Seems like she's found herself an upgrade, hasn't she?"

Alex let out a sigh, his tone tinged with disappointment. "Come on, Henry, don't be like that. You know Sage deserves happiness, just like anyone else. Let's not ruin our evening with jealousy. We're here to have a good time."

Henry let out a heavy sigh, a sense of regret weighing heavily on his heart. "I messed up, didn't I?”

Alex and James exchanged a knowing glance, their silence speaking volumes.

----------

As Kieran and Sage arrived at his home, Sage couldn't help but be in awe of the magnificent Georgian house that stood before her. The exterior exuded a timeless elegance, with its walls adorned in lush ivy vines, giving the impression of a residence steeped in history and charm. The ivy leaves danced gently in the breeze, creating a natural tapestry of green against the stone facade.

The windows of the house boasted flower boxes overflowing with vibrant blooms, adding a touch of color and cheerfulness to the already picturesque scene. Each window seemed to tell a story, as if the house itself had a secret to share.

A round driveway adorned the front, acting as a regal centerpiece to the property. The gravel crunching beneath their feet as they made their way towards the entrance, adding a sense of grandeur to their arrival.

The hedges lining the perimeter of the property were impeccably maintained, trimmed to perfection, showcasing the meticulous attention to detail that went into every aspect of Kieran's home. They formed a natural barrier, providing privacy and a sense of sanctuary from the outside world. 

As Sage's gaze wandered, she couldn't help but notice a Mercedes-Maybach parked on one side of the driveway, a symbol of luxury and refinement. And on the other side, a sleek Jaguar rested, hinting at the varied tastes and choices that Kieran had at his disposal.

The exterior of the house exuded warmth and a welcoming ambiance, with its elegant yet approachable aesthetics. It was a place that felt like home, a sanctuary away from the bustling world outside.

As Kieran opened the doors to his home, Sage was greeted by the sight of classical marbled floors that stretched out before her. The pristine white-paneled walls provided a clean canvas for the beautiful works of art that adorned them, each carefully framed and thoughtfully hung. The air was filled with a delicate fragrance from the fresh flowers that adorned various corners of the house, adding a touch of natural beauty to the already elegant space.

They entered the living room, and Sage couldn't help but notice the juxtaposition of styles that somehow harmonized perfectly. The couch, with its vibrant colors and intricate patterns, stood out boldly against the backdrop of the white-paneled walls. It was a nod to maximalism, an artful blending of different elements that created a vibrant and inviting space.

The room was adorned with shelves filled with books of various genres, a testament to Kieran's intellectual curiosity and love for knowledge. It was evident that literature and the pursuit of wisdom were valued in this household.

As she glanced at a stylish console table, her attention was captivated by a silver framed photograph of a stunning woman, exuding grace and elegance. It was clear that she was Kieran's late wife, a gentle reminder of the love that had once filled these walls. Next to it were pictures of his children, their smiling faces captured in moments of celebration and achievement. Graduation photos told stories of milestones reached and dreams realized.

However, what truly caught Sage's attention was the sight of a sword, encased in a glass display. Its presence spoke of a different chapter in Kieran's life. Her curiosity got the best of her, and she couldn't help but voice her inquiry.

"You were an officer?" Sage asked, her voice filled with intrigue and respect, recognizing the significance of the symbol before her.

Kieran's eyebrows lifted in surprise as Sage's knowledge of the sword's significance became apparent. "So you know what it means?"

Sage hesitated for a moment, her curiosity getting the better of her. "Yeah..." she replied, her voice trailing off slightly.

As her gaze shifted, Sage's eyes caught sight of another item displayed on the shelf—a distinguished medal adorned with the initials GCMG, denoting the highest honors. Realization struck her like a bolt of lightning. Kieran was not just an officer; he was an actual knight.

Her eyes widened in disbelief, and she turned to face him, her expression a mix of astonishment and amusement. "Do I address you as Sir?" she blurted out, unable to contain her incredulity.

Kieran chuckled, a twinkle of amusement in his eyes. "Well, you could if you really wanted to, but I must admit, it's not a title I insist upon in everyday conversation. Kieran will do just fine."

Sage let out a nervous laugh, feeling a touch out of her element. "Alright, Kieran it is. Just know that I'm in the presence of a distinguished knight here. Quite the surprise, I must say."

Sage crossed her arms, her curiosity getting the best of her. "So, Sir Kieran, what mighty service did you perform to earn such an esteemed title?"

Kieran feigned a modest expression, his eyes sparkling mischievously. "Ah, you see, it was quite the daring quest. I battled fierce dragons, rescued damsels in distress, and single-handedly brought peace to the land..."

Sage raised an eyebrow, a playful smirk on her lips. "Oh, really? And here I was thinking it had something to do with your charming wit and debonair personality."

 However, she couldn't resist the temptation to keep guessing, determined to unravel the mystery behind Kieran's esteemed accolades. "Alright, Sir Kieran, let me take another shot at it. Were you perhaps a diplomat? Traversing the globe, negotiating peace treaties and solving international conflicts?"

Kieran chuckled, shaking his head. "Close, but no, my dear. Though I must admit, the thought of me in diplomatic negotiations is quite amusing."

Undeterred, Sage continued her playful guessing. "Alright, how about this? Were you a secret agent, like James Bond or Johnny English, carrying out daring missions while maintaining your impeccable sense of style and humor?"

Kieran chuckled again, a hint of mischief in his eyes. "Maybe, maybe not... hmmm... neither”

Sage's eyes widened with excitement as another idea sparked in her mind. "Wait a minute... are you perhaps the 'M' of the spy world? The one who pulls the strings and sends agents on top-secret missions?"

Kieran burst into laughter, thoroughly amused by Sage's accurate guess. "Oh, I see where you're going with this. But enough about my past for now. Let's focus on the present. How about I get you a hot pack for your comfort and maybe some gelato or ice cream? I've got a feeling it'll make you feel better." but he swiftly changed the topic, avoiding direct confirmation.

As Sage's eyes widened in realization, she couldn't contain her excitement. She followed Kieran into the kitchen, her curiosity growing stronger by the second. She leaned against the kitchen counter, eager to uncover more about his mysterious past.

"Wait, MI5 or MI6?" she blurted out, unable to contain her enthusiasm. "Tell me, tell me, tell me!"

Kieran turned to face her, a playful glint in his eyes. He paused for a moment, savoring the anticipation he had built up. Then, with a smile, he finally revealed, "Worked with both...” 

Sage's eyes sparkled with a mixture of excitement and disbelief. "So you really are M?" she asked, unable to hide her astonishment.

Kieran let out a chuckle, his eyes twinkling mischievously. Ignoring her question, he turned his attention to the freezer, where an array of colorful gelato flavors awaited. He ran his fingers along the frosty glass, considering the options before him.

"Alright, Sage," he said, a playful tone in his voice. "Tell me, which gelato flavor tickles your fancy? We have pistachio, salted caramel, dark chocolate, and a special raspberry sorbet made with fresh fruits from the garden. Hmm... we also have matcha, mango, melon, vanilla, vanilla raspberry, mocha..."

Sage couldn't help but laugh at his diversion tactic, realizing he was purposefully avoiding giving a direct answer. "You're quite the master of evading questions, aren't you? But let's see... I think I'll go with the dark chocolate. Can't resist a good, rich chocolate indulgence."

Kieran nodded approvingly, his gaze lingering on Sage as if he found her choice particularly fitting. "Excellent choice," he remarked, a hint of satisfaction in his voice. "Dark chocolate it is, then."

As Kieran expertly scooped two generous portions of the velvety gelato, Sage couldn't help but be captivated by his effortless grace and the air of mystery that surrounded him. Even as he handed her the ice-cold dessert, he kept his secrets close, teasing her with glimpses of his intriguing past.

As they finished their gelato, Kieran gestured toward a set of double doors leading to his study. "Shall we continue our conversation in a more comfortable setting?" he suggested, a twinkle of anticipation in his eyes.

Sage nodded eagerly, intrigued by the prospect of exploring more of Kieran's world. They entered the study, and she couldn't help but be captivated by the room's ambiance. The same elegant style that permeated the living room carried through into the study, with white-paneled walls adorned with tasteful artwork and shelves filled with carefully curated books.

A plush couch adorned with an array of soft throw pillows invited them to sink into its embrace. Sage couldn't resist running her fingers along the luxurious fabric, appreciating the attention to detail that Kieran had put into every aspect of his home.

The study felt like a sanctuary, a place where ideas could be explored and dreams could take flight. It was a testament to Kieran's refined taste and his appreciation for beauty and knowledge.

They settled onto the couch, sinking into its comfort. Sage couldn't help but feel a sense of ease and intimacy in this space, as if the walls held the whispers of stories waiting to be told.

As Sage stepped further into the study, her eyes were drawn to another console table adorned with a new set of photographs. These pictures exuded an intimate and personal touch, showcasing cherished memories and tender moments.

Amongst the collection, she spotted more pictures of Kieran's children, their smiles capturing the essence of their shared laughter and affection. The images showcased the bond between siblings, the joy of family outings, and the milestones they had celebrated together. It was evident that family played a central role in Kieran's life.

But it was the small, framed portrait of his late wife that held Sage's gaze. The portrait, bathed in warm light, depicted a moment frozen in time—a loving smile, a gentle touch. It was a reminder of the deep connection they had shared, and the love that had shaped Kieran into the person he was today.

As Sage took in the sight, she felt a mix of reverence and admiration. These intimate photographs painted a more profound picture of Kieran's life and the profound impact his family had on him. They spoke of treasured moments, heartfelt memories, and the resilience of love in the face of loss.

Respecting the intimacy of these images, Sage allowed herself a moment of quiet reflection. She understood the weight of Kieran's past and the significance these photographs held in his heart. It served as a reminder of the complexities of human experiences and the stories that shaped them.

Sage took a moment to absorb the atmosphere of the study, enveloped in a sense of tranquility and comfort. She couldn't help but feel a certain reverence for the space that seemed to hold Kieran's most cherished memories.

"This place feels like a sanctuary," she remarked softly, her voice filled with appreciation. "I can understand why you wouldn't want to leave this room. It holds so much history and warmth."

Kieran smiled, his gaze sweeping across the room. "You're absolutely right," he replied, his voice tinged with nostalgia. "My children often say the same thing  whenever my they are around, they practically camp out in this study. It's become their favorite hangout spot," he said, his voice laced with affectionate humor.

"They claim it's because of the comfortable couch and the abundance of throw pillows," he continued, gesturing towards the inviting seating area. "But I suspect it's also because they know I keep a secret stash of their favorite snacks hidden in that drawer over there."

Sage laughed, delighted by the image of Kieran's children making themselves at home in his study. "So, it's not just the allure of your fascinating books and intriguing artifacts, but also the promise of tasty treats that draws them in?"

Kieran nodded, a mischievous grin on his face. "Exactly. I've come to realize that snacks hold a remarkable power of attraction, even in the midst of ancient manuscripts and treasured heirlooms."

They shared a lighthearted moment, their laughter filling the air and infusing the study with an even greater sense of warmth and familiarity. It was in these moments of playful banter that Sage discovered another layer of Kieran's charm, one that made her feel even more at ease in his presence.

For a moment, Sage's curiosity got the better of her, and she couldn't resist delving into Kieran's past. Her eyes wandered back to the console table where the picture of his late wife sat, a reminder of a love that had once been.

"You mentioned having an ex-girlfriend," she began, her voice filled with genuine curiosity. "Forgive me for prying, but... why 'ex'? I mean, look at you, Kieran. You're intelligent, intriguing, and, well, quite easy on the eyes."

Sage's curious remark about Kieran's ex-girlfriend caught his attention. He leaned back on the couch, wearing a mischievous smile, and prepared to share a story that held a hint of drama.

"Well, Sage," he began with a theatrical sigh, "let's just say that my ex-girlfriend had quite the unique way of expressing her affection. She decided to demonstrate her love by... shooting me."

Sage's eyes widened in disbelief as she tried to process his words. Her initial shock quickly turned into a mix of concern and amusement. Kieran couldn't help but chuckle at her reaction, fully aware of the absurdity of his statement.

"Now, now, don't worry," he reassured her, his voice filled with lightheartedness. "I managed to survive the encounter, although my heart might have skipped a beat or two at the time. It turns out she had a bit of a 'trigger-happy' approach to relationships."

He winked playfully at Sage, his eyes twinkling with mischief. The combination of humor and truth in his words created a unique dynamic that both surprised and intrigued her.

"But fear not," he continued, a hint of a smirk on his lips. "I'm well on my way to a full recovery—both physically and emotionally. And I've come to realize that not every woman is armed with a dangerous love like she was."

Sage couldn't help but burst into laughter at Kieran's outlandish explanation. "Shot you? Seriously, Kieran? Are you trying to pull my leg? That's one way to describe a crazy ex-girlfriend!"

Sage's disbelief transformed into a mix of shock and intrigue. She leaned in closer, her eyes fixed on Kieran. "Okay, I'll bite. How on earth did that happen?"

Kieran paused for a moment, as if reliving the memory. He then continued, his voice filled with a dramatic flair. "Well, one fateful evening, during an argument, she dramatically pulled out a water gun and declared, 'I'm about to make your heart wet with love!' Little did I know that she had secretly filled the water gun with ice-cold water."

Sage burst into laughter, unable to contain her amusement at Kieran's absurd and comical rendition of the story. "You're kidding, right? She shot you with a water gun?"

Kieran joined in her laughter, a twinkle of mischief in his eyes. "Well, Sage, let's just say it was a shocking breakup in more ways than one. I guess you could say our relationship was a bit... unconventional."

Sage shook her head, still chuckling. "Unconventional is one way to put it. I must admit, Kieran, you certainly know how to keep things interesting. You have a knack for attracting the wildest stories."

Kieran chuckled, a twinkle in his eyes. "Perhaps, but let's just say it was an experience that made me appreciate the simpler, less weapon-oriented side of relationships."

As their laughter subsided, the tension lifted, and Sage realized that Kieran's lighthearted response was his way of dealing with a past that held both pain and amusement. Deep down, he knew that the truth behind his ex-girlfriend's betrayal and the gunshot was far from funny, but he also understood that revealing the seriousness of the situation might dampen the lighthearted atmosphere between them. So, he decided to keep the details hidden, allowing Sage to believe it was all part of a humorous tale. 

In his mind, Kieran replayed the events that had unfolded with Q, his ex-girlfriend. The sense of betrayal and the dangerous confrontation still lingered, reminding him of the risks he had faced. It was a chapter of his life he had put behind him, but the scars, both physical and emotional, remained.

Kieran leaned forward, his eyes reflecting genuine curiosity. "So, Sage, how did you come to possess such knowledge about the world of espionage? Is it just a keen interest, or is there something more to it?"

Kieran's curiosity piqued as Sage hesitantly admitted, "Well, Kieran, my father... he was actually a part of the MI5."

Kieran's eyebrows shot up in surprise, his gaze fixed on Sage. "Really? Your father was in the MI5? That's quite impressive."

Sage paused for a moment, contemplating whether to share another detail. Finally, she continued, "And, well, one of my ex-boyfriends... he was from the SAS."

Kieran's eyes widened in surprise. "The SAS? That's quite something. You certainly have an interesting history with connections to the military and intelligence."

Sage chuckled, a mix of nostalgia and amusement in her voice. "Yes, interesting is one way to put it. Let's just say that relationship was quite intense. Almost had me jumping out of planes and scaling mountains, if you can believe it."

As Sage thought about the snippets of her past, she couldn't help but remember a particular ex-boyfriend who had been part of the SAS. The memories flooded back, tinged with a mixture of fondness and frustration. In her mind, she recalled how the relationship had been intense, almost resulting in an unexpected pregnancy, and ultimately ending abruptly when he grew weary of the commitment. It was reminiscent of her experience with Henry, another relationship that had left her feeling uncertain and hurt.

Kieran's keen perception picked up on the subtle hint in Sage's comment about her intense relationship with the ex-boyfriend from the SAS. He could sense that there was more to the story, that the relationship had been filled with tumult and emotional ups and downs.

A knowing smile played on Kieran's lips as he looked at Sage. "Ah, jumping out of planes and scaling mountains, huh? Sounds like quite the rollercoaster ride. I can only imagine the adventures and challenges you both must have faced."

As the study doors swung open, a man bearing a striking resemblance to Kieran entered, calling out to him. "Da! Da!" he exclaimed, clutching a box of ice cream in his hands. His voice carried a youthful energy that filled the room.

Kieran turned towards the entrance, a warm smile spreading across his face. "Ah, Charles, perfect timing!" he greeted his youngest son. "And yes, Sage, this is my youngest, Charles. Charles, meet Sage."

Charles beamed with excitement, his eyes lighting up as he looked at Sage. He quickly set the box of ice cream on a nearby table, his attention fully captured by the woman before him. "Woah! Hi, Sage! It's so great to meet you!"

Sage returned his greeting with a kind smile. "Hello, Charles. It's wonderful to meet you too."

Charles couldn't contain his happiness as he turned to his father. "Da, you never told me you were dating someone! This is amazing!"

Kieran chuckled, his eyes sparkling with affection for his son. "Well, Charles, it's still early days. Sage and I are just getting to know each other. But I'm glad you're happy about it."

Charles nodded eagerly, his enthusiasm bubbling over. "Oh, I'm more than happy! It's about time you found someone special, Da. And besides, I came to grab Vi's tub of ice cream before they expire. She won't be too pleased if they go to waste!"

Charles shifted slightly, a shy grin on his face. "Well, I'll leave you two to your... um, conversation. I actually have some work I need to finish, so I should head back home."

Kieran nodded, understanding his son's desire to give them some privacy. "Of course, Charles. We'll catch up later."

With a quick wave, Charles turned to leave the study, but before he disappeared through the doors, he turned back with a mischievous twinkle in his eyes. "Oh, and Dad, I'll make sure to tell Vi the good news! She'll be thrilled."

Kieran chuckled, appreciating his son's support. "Thank you, Charles. I appreciate it."

Charles grinned mischievously and winked at Sage before turning to leave the study. "Have fun, you two! And Dad, remember, don't keep Sage waiting too long."

And with that, Charles bid them farewell and stepped out of the study, leaving Kieran and Sage in a moment of quiet connection.

As Charles left the study, Sage couldn't help but feel a sense of warmth and surprise at the interaction between Kieran and his son. She admired how Charles seemed genuinely happy for his father, even teasing him about sharing the news with Vi. It was clear that Kieran's children were supportive of their father's happiness.

Sage's admiration grew as she observed the loving and supportive relationship between Kieran and his children. The fact that he managed to balance his military career with being a dedicated single father surprised her, and she couldn't help but express her awe. "Kieran, it's truly remarkable how you handle your responsibilities as a single father alongside your previous demanding military work. Your children are so supportive of you, and it's inspiring to see the bond you share with them," she commented, her voice filled with genuine admiration.

Kieran acknowledged her comment with a nod. "Yes, we've had our fair share of ups and downs. Being a single parent while serving in the military has its challenges. But I've always done my best to be there for them, even during the toughest times. I'm grateful that my children have grown into amazing individuals who understand the sacrifices we've made as a family."

Kieran turned his attention to Sage, a curious glimmer in his eyes. "How about you, Sage? You know, it's fascinating how much you've gathered about me already. You've pieced together bits of my past, my work, and even the dramatic encounter with my ex-girlfriend. It's only fair that I get to know more about you in return." 

Sage chuckled, a playful gleam in her eyes. "Fair enough, Kieran. But be warned, my life may not be as thrilling as yours. No exes shooting me, I'm afraid." She leaned back against the couch, contemplating for a moment. "Well, Kieran, where do I begin?

 “What about your familial life? How was it growing up?" 

Sage couldn't help but let out a small chuckle, a hint of mischief in her eyes. "Ah, my familial life," she replied, her tone lighthearted yet honest. "Well, let's just say it was a rollercoaster ride of chaos and craziness. Terrible might be an understatement, but it was definitely... interesting."

Kieran raised an eyebrow, intrigued by her response. "Interesting, you say? Care to elaborate?"

Sage took a deep breath, her gaze fixed on the window as she mustered the courage to share her past. "Well, Kieran, my childhood was... let's just say it had its fair share of challenges. My parents had a unique way of expressing their love... through an unconventional language of insults and backhanded compliments. I became their favorite sparring partner, the recipient of their creative repertoire of verbal jabs."

A wry smile tugged at the corners of her lips, as if she was finding humor in the absurdity of it all. She chuckled softly, masking the deeper pain that lay beneath the surface. "I guess you could say I developed a thick skin and a quick wit as my defense mechanisms. I became fluent in the art of comebacks, a black belt in the martial art of sarcasm."

As she glanced up at Kieran, a flicker of vulnerability passed through her eyes, hinting at the emotional toll those words had taken on her.  Kieran nodded, his expression filled with understanding. He could sense the layers of complexity that lay beneath Sage's lighthearted words, and he appreciated her ability to find humor in hard situations. It was yet another aspect of her that made him feel drawn to her.

After a brief moment of reflection, Kieran decided to lighten the mood. A mischievous grin spread across his face as he leaned forward, his eyes sparkling with curiosity. "Well, Sage, it seems you've mastered the art of wit and comebacks. But tell me, what do you do now? How do you make a living in this crazy world?"

Sage's eyes lit up with excitement as she leaned in, ready to share her professional endeavors. "Ah, Kieran, prepare to be amazed! I am a designer, but not just any designer. I specialize in creating... wait for it... the most bizarre and outrageous inventions you can imagine!"

Kieran's eyebrows shot up in intrigue, a playful smile playing on his lips. "Bizarre and outrageous inventions? You have my full attention. Tell me more."

Sage chuckled, delighted by his enthusiasm. "Well, you see, I design things like self-peeling bananas, solar-powered umbrellas that also make you coffee, and even a talking toaster that gives motivational speeches every morning. It's all about combining the practical with the absurd, creating inventions that bring a smile to people's faces."

Kieran burst into laughter, picturing the comical scenarios and imagining a world filled with Sage's whimsical creations. "That is absolutely brilliant, Sage! I can only imagine the joy and laughter your inventions must bring to people's lives."

Sage beamed, grateful for Kieran's appreciation. "Thank you, Kieran. It's a joy to be able to blend my creativity with humor and make a living off patents, apps, and the occasional talking toaster. It's safe to say that my inventions have become a rather... unique source of passive income."

Sage couldn't help but chuckle at the thought of her outlandish inventions, but then she shifted to a more serious tone, wanting to share the true source of her success. "But in all seriousness, Kieran, my real breakthrough came when I developed a selling platform app. It caught the attention of a venture capitalist who saw its potential and decided to acquire it."

Kieran leaned in, his interest piqued. As an angel investor, he had a keen eye for promising ventures. "Really? That's impressive, Sage. It seems like you struck gold with that app. What happened next?"

A gleam of satisfaction appeared in Sage's eyes as she continued, "Well, let's just say that selling the app opened up a world of opportunities for me. Suddenly, I found myself living in a realm of luxury I never could have imagined before. But I didn't stop there. I still have my design patents, which turned out to be quite the cash cows, and a few more app ideas that have caught the attention of potential buyers."

Kieran's curiosity grew even more, his mind buzzing with possibilities. "You have more apps up your sleeve? That's fascinating, Sage. I'd love to hear more about them. Who knows, maybe we can explore some investment opportunities together."

Sage's face lit up with excitement, her eyes twinkling mischievously. "Oh, Kieran, you're in for a wild ride! I've got app ideas that will make people's jaws drop faster than a rollercoaster ride. We're talking about apps that can predict the future hairstyle trends, an app that delivers pizza directly into your dreams, and even an app that helps you find your lost socks!”

Kieran couldn't help but chuckle at Sage's infectious enthusiasm. "Lost socks, huh? Now that's a problem worth solving!”

Sage nodded, a playful grin spreading across her face. "Absolutely! I mean, who hasn't wondered where all those missing socks disappear to? With my app, you'll never have to face a mismatched sock day again!"

They both burst into laughter, their shared sense of humor creating a lighthearted bond between them.

A/N: Hello everyone! I sincerely hope you've been enjoying the story thus far. As we delve deeper into the narrative, I wanted to address a couple of things.

Firstly, there were some significant events involving Q and Kieran from ‘DARK NIGHT’ that were mentioned earlier in the story. Initially, I had planned to create an action-packed short to fully illustrate what happened. However, I found myself struggling to proceed with that approach. Instead, I decided to provide the necessary details and insights into their experiences through this chapter. Rest assured, even though they come from a different story, they belong to the same created universe.

Secondly, I want to acknowledge that there may be grammatical errors, redundancy, or repetitiveness within the text. I apologize for any such mistakes. I will be conducting a soft editing pass to rectify these issues and ensure a smoother reading experience.

Thank you all for your support and patience. Your feedback and enthusiasm are greatly appreciated. I hope you continue to enjoy the journey as the story unfolds.

[endlessbittersweetdreams]

"Labor of Love" (Part 1)

SUMMARY: Jake and Lilah look forward to the impending birth of their baby girl. Also, they have an unexpected encounter with the last person they want to see. Continuation of “Broken & Beautiful.”

Part 2

PAIRINGS: Jake and Lilah; Will and Allison

TRIGGER WARNING: Read with caution! This part references Simone's grooming/abuse of Jake when he was a child. Nothing graphic or detailed.

SUNFLOWER DIVIDER: Firefly Graphics

     It’s March now, and I’m in my sixth month. Baby Maya is still doing well, and she still seems to have a fondness for being a night owl. I know some people may think I’m crazy, but I’m convinced that the reason why she’s especially active at night is because she knows that’s when she can have the full attention of her parents. From the moment we wake up in the morning, Jake and I are busy getting ready for the day. And while we’re bartending, we can’t exactly stop every five minutes to talk to her via my baby bump. So it’s at night, when we’re at home, that she seems to take advantage of the quietness. Jake laughs off my suspicions, of course. Whatever the reason, our little girl likes to throw a late-night party for one in my womb. Not that I’m complaining. I love feeling her move around. It means that she’s healthy and safe.

     According to my OB, I’m also healthy. Though I feel like my body is waging a war against me. The sixth month has ushered in a new set of pregnancy symptoms: heartburn, backaches, dizziness, leg cramps and hot flashes.

     Up until recently, I was never one to move around much during sleep hours. It used to be that I could fall asleep and maybe - once in a blue moon - switch positions once or twice. Now, thanks to my aching back and the occasional leg cramp, I just can’t seem to stay comfortable. I don’t know how Jake puts up with my tossing and turning. Thankfully, the leg cramps can be prevented by staying hydrated. I always make sure to keep a “go cup,” filled with water handy. The only thing is: I have to get up to pee more often. During the day, I can take advantage of a stool whenever I need to take pressure off of my aching back or if dizziness hits me. And at night, Jake and I have become experts at arranging the pillows so I can stay comfortable as long as possible.

     As far as the heartburn is concerned, I have to avoid some of my favorite foods. It’s been easy to part with spicy foods. But when my OB suggested avoiding chocolate and citrus, I just about hit the roof. I am a “chocoholic,” and sometimes my resolve begins to crumble whenever I see anything chocolate being paraded in front of me at the restaurant. On top of that, my favorite fruits happen to be oranges and lemons. On the rare occasion when I end up cutting lemons at the restaurant, and I catch a whiff of their scent, I have to remind myself of two things: (1) if I sneak a bite, I’m technically stealing from the restaurant; and (2) I’ll just pay for it later on. Curse you, heartburn!

     I wish I could say that my changing body and weight gain haven’t affected how I feel about my appearance. There are times when I absolutely love the way I look. If I’m wearing a cute maternity dress, and I have my hair just so, I feel confident. But then, there are those days when I want to avoid the mirror as much as possible. When that happens, Jake is quick to assure me that I’m still beautiful and desirable to him, bump and all. That sentiment is sweet, but it’s hard to feel that way sometimes. And let’s just say that my work clothes? They’re even less flattering, now that I have this belly.

     Jake and I managed to get out of bed early this morning, as we’ve chosen today to go shopping for a stroller and a crib. Thankfully, there’s a place nearby that sells baby gear. They also happen to deliver, which is an added benefit to having them close to where we live. Since our place is only a few blocks from the store, we’ve opted to walk home. Of course, there are certain smells that get to me. But it’s a nice morning, and I want to have a nice stroll with my husband.

     Jake and I take our time, walking side-by-side. “Well, that was a productive morning,” I comment, threading my arm through his. He makes a sound of agreement, and I smile to myself. “Just think. In three months, she’ll be here. Maybe by then, we’ll have a middle name picked out.”

     “I thought we agreed on Elizabeth.”

     “We did. But then, I realized that her initials would be M.E.H. You know, ‘meh’. Doesn’t convey the right message.” He chuckles. “I know! I know. I’m over-thinking things again. Maybe we’ll keep Elizabeth on the table.” I stop for a moment, thinking. I tend to lean toward the old-fashioned names, and so I suggest “What about Katherine?”

     “I thought we ruled that one out.”

     “We did?” I scrunch up my nose, scanning my memory banks. “I don’t think so.”

     “Yup. It was during our ‘Olivia, Elizabeth, Anne, Katherine, Jade’ debate.”

     “Really?” I roll my eyes. “I guess my pregnancy brain has struck again. Well, I guess we can revisit Katherine and Olivia.”

     “What about Jade?”

     I don’t particularly like that name, but Jake seems to favor it. And you know what they say about marriage: it’s important to make compromises. “All right. We can revisit Jade.”

     We pass by a bakery that happens to have its doors open, and the scent of freshly-baked bread wafts toward me. This, thankfully, is one of the few scents that doesn’t bother me. If anything, it makes my stomach growl. Loudly.

     “Sorry. Guess it’s that bread. Smells delicious,” I say with a blush.

     Jake laughs. “I’m a little hungry, too. What do you want?”

     My response is immediate. “Bagel. Plain cream cheese.”

     We break apart and, while Jake enters the bakery, I sit down on a nearby bench so I can rest my back. I look down at my belly and give it a light, affectionate rub. “What do you think, little one? Do you want to be ‘Maya Jade’ or ‘Maya Katherine’? How about this: one kick for Jade. Two for Katherine.” One kick. “Traitor,” I tease with a little laugh.

     My mirth soon comes to a screeching halt when I hear a familiar, feminine voice say to me “Hello, Lilah.”

     I close my eyes and cringe as chills run up my spine. I let out a steadying breath, open my eyes, and look up at the intruder. “Simone,” I greet cooly.

     She looks down at me, eyebrow raised. Damn! “I see you have a new addition on the way. Congratulations.”

     “Thank you.” I look in the direction of the bakery, but it’s too crowded to see my husband. Jake, where are you? Hurry up! I think to myself.

     “Well, I’m very happy to see that things are going so well for you.”

     “Thanks.” I have to get out of here. Pronto. “ Umm ... I hate to be rude, but I really should get going. I have to work in a few hours.” I make a move to stand up, hoping she’ll take the hint, and stop in my tracks when she speaks again.

     “Are you still in touch with Jake?” I roll my eyes up at the heavens and turn around to face her, trying to keep my expression neutral. “I know you two were close. I lost touch with Jake a while ago, and I’m wondering if he’s all right.”

     Not wanting to give away too much information, I keep things vague. “He’s fine. Now, if you’ll excuse me ...”

     I don’t know what to do. I want to get away from Simone; from the negativity and stress she’s making me feel. But I can’t just leave Jake behind. Especially without notice. Chewing on my lower lip, I try to work out what I should do. Deciding I should warn Jake, I duck into a nearby shop and pull my phone out of my purse. In a matter of moments, I’ve typed out my warning and sent it to him.

     Jake, S.O.S. Simone just showed up. She’s outside the bakery. She knows about the baby, and she asked about you. I’m hiding out in the flower shop nextdoor.

     I let out a long breath and run a hand over my belly, trying to calm down. I can feel my heart pounding in my chest as I begin to pace, hoping Jake will get my message in time. The florist asks if I’m all right, sharing a concerned glance with one of her customers. I give them both a nod and say “I’m fine.” I stay close to the window, looking out every now and then. Still no sign of Jake.

     “Is there anything I can help you with?” the florist asks.

     “No. I’m just waiting for my husband. Thank you.”

     The florist nods, seeming to accept my answer. “Would you like some water? I can bring out a chair, if you’d like to sit down.”

     “Water would be great. Thank you.”

     The florist approaches me a little while later, presenting me with a cold bottle of water. “Are you sure you don’t want a chair?”

     “I’m fine. Just wondering where my husband is,” I say, trying to play it off as a pregnant wife who’s feeling impatient. I take a few gulps of water and put the cap back on, pretending to be a potential customer. “These arrangements are lovely. Have you been in business long?”

     “Six years. If you don’t mind ... what are you having?”

     Rubbing my belly affectionately, I answer “A girl. She’s our first baby, and she’s due in June.”

     “Your first. How exciting!” She pauses for a moment. “May I offer you some free, unsolicited advice?” I nod. “Take as many pictures as possible. To this day, I regret not doing that with my children.”

     I give her a smile. “My husband is a photographer. I’m sure we’ll be up to our ears in pictures. I don’t know how many he’s taken of me and my bump.” I look out the window again, frowning when I see Jake. Seems he wasn’t able to sneak past Simone after all. “Umm ... I see my husband outside. Thank you for the water.” I open my wallet and pull out some money, intending to reimburse her, but she waves me off.

     “No need to worry about that. You just enjoy that baby of yours.”

     “I will. Thank you, Molly.”

     Bracing myself, I push open the door and step outside. As predicted, Jake’s reunion with Simone is a tense one. He is facing me, his expression stern. Simone, meanwhile, has her back to me. Seems my text message didn’t make a bit of difference. Either he didn’t have a chance to read it before he left the bakery, or he received it in time and decided not to hide out until Simone was gone. I’m not exactly thrilled about being near that woman again. Knowing what she did to Jake makes my skin crawl, and I don’t want her to try to weasel her way back into Jake’s life. But Jake needs my support, and I’m tired of hiding. And so, smoothing down my dress and squaring my shoulders, I step into what feels like Ground Zero. As I move closer, I can pick up on what Simone is saying.

     “I don’t understand you, Jake. Two years’ worth of silence. Because of what? Because I went back to Etienne? Because I chose to make a life for myself?” She shakes her head, making a single clucking sound with her tongue. “I’m disappointed in you, Jake. I thought that, with a little time, you’d come to your senses. I thought you were more mature than this.”

     Jake’s eyes narrow into a glare, his jaw clenching. If I’m going to make my move, it’s now. Without saying a single word to Simone, I step around her and take my place by Jake’s side. I reach out and take his hand in his, giving it a reassuring squeeze. He returns the gesture and then says “Simone, you remember Lilah ... my wife.”

     The petty side of me wishes I could take a picture of Simone, because her reaction is priceless. In all the years I’ve known her, I’ve never seen her flabbergasted.

     “Your wife?”

     “Yes. His wife.” I hold up my left hand to show her the simple white gold wedding band that graces my finger.

     Simone casts a look in Jake’s direction, and he simply stares back at her. “When did this happen?”

     “Last year,” Jake states with a smirk.

     “Oh! Well ... congratulations! I’m happy for you two.”

     “Are you?” Jake snarks back.

     She blinks at him, and she has the gall to act surprised. “Yes, Jake. Of course I am. I know we’ve had our differences, but I just want you to be happy.”

     “Really?” He shakes his head. “You want me to be happy? Is that why you tried to come between us?” He gestures between himself and yours truly. “Is that why you tried to put doubts in our heads?”

     “Jake, I --”

     “Don’t!" He leans toward Simone, looking her directly in the eyes. She seems to be intimidated by him now, and it’s a wonderful sight. For once, the manipulator seems to be backed into a corner. Jake keeps his voice low, but his anger comes through loud and clear. “Don’t deny it! Don’t try to twist things around! Don’t you fucking dare try to manipulate me again! For years, I let you get away with it because I was terrified that you’d write me off and abandon me. You knew that, and you used that to keep me under your thumb.”

     “Jake --”

     He lets go of my hand, and I watch while a few pedestrians give us strange looks as they pass by. “Whenever I came close to finding happiness apart from you, you did everything you could to take it away. You did that with my business plans, and I let you. You did the same thing when Lilah and I got together. That time, you failed because I love her ... and she loves me. And for once in my life, I feel safe.” Simone stares back at him, and Jake nods at her. “That’s right, Simone. I feel safe with Lilah. Do you know why? It’ because she doesn’t lie to me or manipulate me. All she has ever done is stand by me and love me. And you hate it because it means that I don’t need you anymore! It means can’t control me or keep me under your thumb! For once, I’m living my life the way I want to!”

     Simone stays silent this time. Maybe it’s because her shock has rendered her speechless, or maybe it’s because she knows better than to try to argue with Jake. He stays quiet for a while, taking a series of deep breaths. Then he looks around, and I watch him carefully as he leans even closer to Simone. What he says next seems to shake her to her very core.

     “And I remember what you did to me, Simone.” He nods at her, his pale skin flushed with anger. “That’s right. I don’t remember how young I was when it started, but it did happen. You can say that you were a child. But I was a child, and what you did to me ... It’s sick. You took whatever innocence I had left, and you twisted it and you degraded it. I don’t care that you were lonely. I don’t care that your parents didn’t pay attention to you. There’s no excuse for what you did to me. I trusted you, and you betrayed me.

     “Because of you, I’m damaged. Yes, my mother’s suicide messed me up. But you made life miserable for me. I don’t think I’ll ever be fixed. All I know is this: I’m better off without you. And I’ll be damned if I let you back into my life. This time, I don’t just have myself to look after. I have a wife ... and we have a child on the way. And there’s no way in Hell that I will ever let you near us again. They mean everything to me. And you? You are nothing. Stay away from me. Stay away from us. If you come near us again, you won’t be walking away.”

     The staredown lasts for what seems like an eternity until Simone backs down. Jake straightens up, takes a few steps back, and gently grabs my hand. He watches Simone for a few seconds longer, giving her a warning glare, and then walks with me in the direction of our apartment. We’re only a short distance away from our building, and Jake casts a glance behind us every now and then to make sure Simone isn’t following us. We reach our building and, when we’re certain she’s long gone, use our key to open the main door. We make our way up the stairs to the second floor and stop outside apartment 2A. It’s only now, as Jake fumbles with his key, that I see that his hands are shaking.

     “Here. Let me.”

     I gently take the key from him and insert it into the lock, turning it to the left. Another half-turn to the right, and I pull the key out of the lock. We step inside and Jake closes the door, leaning against it with a heavy sigh. After setting the key down in the dish on the table by the door, I step forward and reach out to him. Because of my belly, I can’t give him a full-frontal hug like I used to. Instead, I wrap an arm around him and lean against him, my head resting on his shoulder. The palm of his left hand is pressed against the small of my back, while his other hand rests on my belly.

     “Are you okay?” I ask, listening as his breathing slows down to a normal pace.

     He breathes out a sigh and kisses the top of my head, breathing in my scent. “I’ll be okay. What about you? Are my girls okay?”

     “Yeah. We’re fine. I’m sorry she ambushed you. I thought that if I went into the bakery, I’d lead her straight to you. That’s why I texted you and hid out in that flower shop. I didn’t know what else to do.”

     “Hey. It’s not your fault. You and I both knew she’d show up again.” He pauses for a few seconds. “I needed it. I had to tell her what she did to me. She’ll probably never stop making excuses. But ... I think it’s safe to say she’s out of our life for good.”

     We pull apart and face each other, and I reach out to touch his face. Stroking his cheek with my thumb, I say “I know what happened back there wasn’t easy for you, but I’m proud of you. I always am.”

     He kisses the palm of my hand, and I can feel him smile against it. Then he leads me over to the sofa, where we eat our pastries in comfortable silence.

@anastacia-lynn

@mypsychoticlove