#i’ve lost all motivation for college

[plainclothesdisaster]

DPxDC Mechanical Engineer Danny

Danny caught the attention of Batman while studying at Gotham University for his alternative energy projects. He’s hired right out of college to work on the Watchtower.

He shows absolutely no tell of his abilities till there’s a dire situation- Flash’s electric discharge messes with one of his projects in progress and the whole base would have lost air pressure if he hadn’t done a quick fix using telekinesis and ice.

Of course Batman notices.

Batman assumes the worst- he suspects Danny’s a rogue of some kind, someone who has infiltrated the Justice League with an ulterior motive. But he can’t just fire Danny now- he’s the only one who knows how the new Watchtower energy source works. Plus, he’s not letting Danny go anywhere until he’s figured out his true motives.

Cue Batman subtly testing Danny- tossing things at him to trigger inhuman fast reflexes, having him lift too-heavy machinery, setting up convenient opportunities to steal or snoop or otherwise be up to no good. Danny does take advantage but only once, to use a computer terminal with unlocked clearance. He didn’t plant any bugs that Barman could find, and he otherwise kept up his powerless civilian act perfectly.

Still, Batman’s not satisfied. He brings an infrasonic sound emitter to Danny’s lab one day, and that, of all things, is what gets Danny to break.

“I know what you’re doing,” Danny admits with a sigh, finally. “If you’re really that suspicious of me, I can leave, but I kinda like my job so I’d prefer not to. The benefits are insane compared to what’s standard.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Sure. yeah. How about you turn off the freaking noise generator and we can talk?”

“Hm.” Batman obliges, and he takes the stool next to Danny at his gesture.

“Number one, I’m not a meta. Despite all the data and conclusions you’ve probably drawn otherwise. Number two, I’m on your side. I’m here to work on the base, that’s it. I follow your rules to the letter.”

“The-“

“The classified files I looked at? Yeah that was the one exception. You already know what I looked at, I’m sure, but maybe you haven’t figured out why. It goes back to point one- I may not be a meta, but I am something that organization, the GIW, cares about. I looked at your files on them to sus out your relations. Seeing as I don’t particularly love being the victim to twelve degrees of human rights violations if I can avoid it.”

“Hm.” The Ghost Intelligence Ward was one of many government agencies that the Justice League hadn’t worked closely with. But they also hadn’t been flagged for Justice League investigation. Danny’s comments made him doubt that call.

“Any other questions?”

“If you’re not a meta, what are you?”

“I’m an engineer. A pretty decent one. And I’d really, really like it to stay that way.”

Batman considers, and ultimately lets him stay. He likes Danny (everyone likes Danny), and it would be a massive pain in the ass to replace him. He really is a good engineer.

It’s only much later that his faith in Danny is repaid in spades.

Batman finds Danny on the Watchtower command bridge. Alarms are blaring, the station has been knocked out of orbit, out the window there’s shrapnel floating everywhere as a space battle rages around them.

On the station it’s chaos. Technicians run around, shouts from the med bay, sparks from the walls.

Batman and Danny stand at the main controls, watching the battle outside, stoic, unmoving.

Wonder Woman’s harried voice crackles through on coms: “We need backup.”

“There is no more backup.” Batman replies, while looking pointedly at Danny.

“What?”

Batman doesn’t move.

“What.”

“The impact from Darkseid’s initial attack should have sent this station on a terminal trajectory toward the planet.”

“Well. We aren’t currently plummeting to our deaths, so turns out it didn’t do that.”

“You did something.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“You’re lying.”

“Maybe Superman nudged us back on course in all the chaos.”

“I’ve been watching the trackers. No one else with the capability has come near the station.”

“Can’t you just be grateful we got lucky?”

Sounds of peril screech over the coms. Danny’s face scrunches.

“Luck had nothing to do with it. As it is now, we are going to lose this fight.”

“Isn’t there anyone else you can call?”

“I’m asking you. You can help, can’t you?”

The glare-off lasts a long moment more before Danny breaks.

“Fuck. Fuckity fuck.” Danny runs his hands through his hair. “Shit. You don’t know what you’re asking.”

“I’m asking you to save this and countless other worlds from a genocide. I’m also asking you to save my friends.”

Danny looks at him, hard, weary, and with a kind of deep resolve that feels far too ancient to be on the face of a supposed twenty-something.

“Fine. Fine. Okay.” He steps back and transforms. If Batman is surprised when he shakes off his human appearance like an old coat, he doesn’t show it. But what’s undeniable is the being in Danny’s place has the unmistakable presence of power.

“No one else can know.” His voice echoes in a way that’s sonically impossible, both sounding closer and further away than he should be.

He pulls a gear-shaped medallion seemingly out of thin air and puts it over his head in one motion.

“If I get in trouble for this, I’m blaming you.”

He vanishes. Outside, the shape of the battle changes instantly. The stars seem to glow brighter as the arms of the galaxy flash with the colors of the aurora. Then it’s like the void of space itself comes alive. It moves the spaceships back like they’re toys, plucking them from one side of the field to the other. It finds Darkseid at the heart of the chaos and massive arms of nothingness and darkness wrap around him. He’s screaming as it swallows him whole.

His armies scatter. The battle turns. The JL deal with the stragglers, but the air of relief is palpable.

Danny reappears next to Batman, once again donning his grease-stained coveralls. Arms folded.

“Happy?”

It took all of five minutes. Less, probably. Batman tamps down a thousand questions.

“Thank you.”

“I’m gonna need two weeks off minimum.” Danny snaps. “One to deal with the bureaucratic nightmare you’ve just caused me, and another to recover from the headache.”

Batman blanks. “Granted.”

Danny sighs. “And I’m not fixing the station until I’m back. It won’t fall out of the sky as is. Make up whatever excuse you want.”

“Done.” He considers. “I would prefer to tell them the truth. That you saved us.”

Danny glares. “I’m not supposed to save you. I made a pact not to use my power to influence the mortal realm.”

“A pact with who?”

Danny rolls his eyes. “The embodiment of Time. The concept of Justice. Among others.” He smirks at Batman’s confusion.

“And what, exactly, does that make you?”

He stands, framed by the space window, haloed by the stars. “I’ll give you three guesses.”

Batman frowns.

“Look. I like you guys. I like working on your base. I like supporting the work you do. But you can not go factoring me in to any of your plans or contingencies. This was a one time thing.

“So to answer your question again: I’m an engineer.”

[thatnonameuser]

Where would Mc go when Raven College is on a break(winter break,etc.)Would everyone try to subtly convince MC to go with them in their homeland? Maybe have ulterior motives to take them away?

MC (for plot reasons) will be spending the start of her winter break at NRC. After that, I got to see how TWST handles it before I decide what the heck I’m going to do that.

Since MC has to stay at NRC for at least a week for Book 4 to even happen, I’ve written some worldbuilding to excuse the plot hole.

Given that Crewel and Trein are from Darling Rights Areas, areas that have a bunch of red tape when it comes to darlings being claimed and cared for, it would be somewhat difficult to get her adoption papers expedited. Bureaucracy is a pain in every single world and winter break is probably a nightmare for yandere students trying to bring their freshly kidnapped darlings home for the holidays and their yandere parents trying to stop them from taking their darling children away from home for the holidays. 

That in mind, they would have to go through the same annoying red tape that any adult adopting a child would have to. Just worse, because of the backlog caused by all the people making it worse. So in essence, because of my rules for how claiming a darling works for platonic yanderes, MC has to wait until the bureaucracy gets its act together and allows her guardians to actually be her guardians.

So she’ll be stuck with Grim and the ghosts for about ten days before she can go to live with her platonic guardians. Enough time for her to be held captive by Jamil in Scarabia and for shit to hit the fan. 

IDK if  there’s a plot reason why I’ll have to have her stay behind, I’ll cross that bridge when I get there.

Oh yes, obviously they’ll try but she’s not falling for it. And yes they will have ulterior motives but by that point she’s lost her ability to give the benefit of the doubt. 

[jclolz22]

multi bot release

i thought i’d release some bots while i’m still finishing up my next big release, so here are some randoms that i’ve worked on lately. i hope you guys enjoy, and thank you again for all the support and love!!

note: yes i am aware that for the kate sharma bot, it is a combination of two different scenes, that did not happen at the same time, nor did they even happen consecutively. i was mistaken when i first made the bot and just kept it the way i did it. also, whoever requested the professor!tashi bot, i love you because this one is a new fave of mine.

aubrey posen and chloe beale — recruitment

ever since aubrey’s mishap at last year’s icca finals, things went downhill for the barden bellas. now, it’s a new school year, and they’re looking for new members. seeing them at the activity fair, neither chloe nor aubrey can stop themselves from trying to recruit you and rebuild the bellas’ image.

cece parekh — in love (gn!user)

you’ve tried so hard to deny your lasting feelings for cece, knowing that it’s the best thing for both of you, especially considering the fact that she doesn’t feel the same way. at least, that’s what you’ve thought for the longest time now. hearing jess’ confession of cece’s feelings for you has you ready to find her on that mountain and tell her the truth. that is, until you have an unexpected visitor at the loft.

kate sharma — bee fright

your pall-mall ball, along with kate’s, got lost in the forestry surrounding your home, so you and her go to search for them. after spotting the balls, you notice that they’re near an area you’d prefer to avoid. kate went over to her ball, ready to hit it when you saw a bee land on her, sending you into a deep panic. the memories of your father flashed in your mind, and you couldn’t stop yourself from being overcome with anxiety.

quinn fabray — real you

quinn is discouraged by lauren exposing her past, yet you want to make sure that she knows you don’t care about who she used to be— you love her anyway and want her to know that she shouldn’t be ashamed of her younger self.

quinn fabray — reuniting (req./gn!user)

dating quinn was more than wonderful, but going to different colleges and trying to do long distance just didn’t work out. four years later, you’re both college graduates, and she’s more than excited to see you again. but when she shows up at your apartment and comes inside, the sight that surrounds her is one that shocks her all at the same time. she’s left with many questions, and wants the answers.

santana lopez — rumours

ever since you said that santana “plays for the other team,” it’s been the newest piece of hot gossip in the muckraker, mckinley’s student-run paper. it’s safe to say that seeing that in the latest edition did not make her happy; not at all.

tashi duncan — office hours (req.)

you love going to stanford, and you always enjoy going to class as you’re truly interested in what you’re studying. having tashi as one of your professors may or may not be your sole motivation when it comes to going to office hours consistently. well, every single day, actually. she’s even offered to provide you assistance on the weekends.

[usedpidemo]

4th anniversary update! (reflection, future, and other thoughts.)

Hi everyone! π here.

Can you believe how fast time has flown by? It’s been four years since I opened this account and began my blogging/writing journey. Four years. Even writing this, it’s still kinda insane to comprehend that I’ve been this chronically online for so long. Normally, whenever I have a hyperfixation or interest, it tends to be strong for a few weeks, hell up to a year maximum, before it ultimately flames out—but not writing and specifically this blog. I may not be as active as I used to, but even during my limited down time, I always get that itch to write, and I wish I cherished and made the most of the times when I was actually free, because Lord knows how hard finishing up college is.

As is now tradition, here’s a brief timeline and log of the blog so far:

First work: Sandwich (Red Velvet Wendy) (published 05/13/21)

Number of works published: 105 (1 fic every 13.91 days)

Work with highest note count: Tell your friends (Ive Yujin x Wonyoung) (published 01/14/23, 1317 notes)

500 followers: June 18, 2021 (36 days)

1000 followers: October 12, 2021 (152 days)

2000 followers: June 18, 2022 (401 days)

3000 followers: November 12, 2022 (548 days)

4000 followers: May 22, 2023 (740 days)

5000 followers: December 18, 2023 (950 days)

6000 followers: September 10, 2024 (1216 days)

Current follower count: 6626 followers (1 new follower every 4.54 days)

It feels like I’ve written quite a lot, but at the same time not enough considering how long I’ve been doing this hobby/profession. As of writing this update/reflection, I’m smack dab in the middle of the final two weeks of college, so I do apologize there isn’t anything huge or bombastic to celebrate the milestone, but rest assured, once I finish up finals, activity will ramp up for at least a few months—from June to August. 

I can’t understate or declare my sincerest gratitude and appreciation for each and every single of you, be it reader, follower, or lurker. For giving me a chance and for all the feedback, both good and bad, it motivates me to always be better. Never in my wildest dreams would I think that I could make something out of writing, but now, it’s become a passion, and more importantly, a semi-reliable source of income on the side. So once again, thank you. 

—————

I cannot stress how bad 2024 was. Like even with a few good moments, 2024 was easily one of the toughest years of my life. So much so that the fallout continued into 2025 and even now. The family was dangerously close to falling apart, our business was tanking, and there was so much going on that every facet of our lives was put through the ringer. It was taxing for all of us—emotionally, financially, spiritually, physically. 

Five months into the new year, and the challenges never seem to stop. We’ve been forced to temporarily close our restaurant and go into a big corporate restructuring. Utilities and daily needs at times feel like a huge blow to our budget. The mall that houses our shop won’t release our assets unless we pay them an exorbitant fee despite the fact they did not provide some sort of compensation when they closed off our section because they were building a new parking area and at times, were seemingly trying to sabotage and undercut us. Everyday feels like a struggle just to get by.

However, not all hope is lost. For one, the relationship between my mother and my sister has slowly been repairing since December, and thank God. I can’t imagine how worse off we would be if there’s still this tension between the three of us. Then there’s this property that, court willing, we could turn into another form of passive income or outright sell for millions. And then there’s me. I’m currently hard at work writing up my thesis, hence the lack of activity and new fics. While I won’t have to formally defend it till December, I have to submit a proposal for my final this semester. It’s been hard. Business and research has never been my strong suit; if I had a choice, I should have gone into a creative course when I first started college, but circumstances kept that from happening. Nevertheless, graduating has been my mom’s priority for me so that I can help out in some shape or form.

So once again, I apologize for lack of activity recently. Thankfully, it’s only at least two more weeks, then we can get back to writing. But also, I’ve been trying to find a part-time job online so I can make some money on the side while waiting for the next academic year to start. Gonna be a challenge to balance so much all at once; I don’t even know if I’ll follow through on the latter.

With all that said, while this isn’t in my field of expertise, and this is something I usually keep to myself, I have been doing AI edits of K-pop idols in my free time. Edits that would probably get me booted off this site; they’re really lewd. I’ve been keeping a stash for a few months and I figure that there are people who actually pay for this stuff (wild!). So I’ve made the executive decision to add a membership that you can subscribe to, both in Ko-fi and Patreon. 

Membership on either site will give you the same benefits—from having a dedicated server/access to the aforementioned edits/pics, the ability to request an idol you wish to have an edit of, the ability to vote on membership-only polls deciding what I will write next, discounts on commissions, and previews to my upcoming works, including being able to read them days ahead of their public release. 

I would like to reiterate that none of my published fics/written work will be paywalled; this is a bit more degenerate in nature. I recommend if you’re gonna avail of the membership to subscribe to Patreon, since I don’t wanna nuke my Ko-fi account with the explicit content I might upload on it, and Patreon is seemingly more adult content friendly. Regardless, this is all optional and changes nothing otherwise, but is merely another means of showing support :). As long as it’s on any of the four sites I post on—Tumblr, AFF, AO3, and Wattpad—my work will be readily available to read. Also, this is all completely optional; support if you’re compelled to do so, but don’t feel the urgency to help. Everything will work out by itself.

As the clock winds down on another year around the Tumblr sun, I would like to take this opportunity to personally thank everyone—to the community, to my peers, to all my followers, and to you, dearest reader, for sitting through another year with me. I don’t need to beat it over your head that my personal life has been shit, but if a recent movie has reminded me of anything, it’s that we’re never alone (shoutout Bob). If I were given a chance to walk a different path or redo everything, I would go through this journey all over again—that’s how special and meaningful it has become. Most importantly, the story isn’t over yet; there’s still pages to be written, memories to be made, and a great reward that’s waiting at the finish line. 

With grace,

Peter / π

[ifortom]

Bad Decisions - T. H. (3)

frat!Tom x Reader - Fake dating AU

Chapter Summary: Friendships are made, questions are answered, and hearts race.

MASTERLIST

W/C: +5K

• DAY 3

"Hey, newest hot topic on campus." You heard it as soon as you left the classroom.

Amber positioned herself by your side as you walked down the university hallway.

"Hey! Is that what people are calling me now?" Amber laughed lightly.

"Well, being seen swapping spit with one of the star players comes with certain consequences." She said, slipping her arm through yours. "Where are you headed now?"

"Uh, I thought I'd grab lunch and then probably head home. I need to catch up on some things I let slide over the weekend." Amber smirked.

"I bet you made good use of that time." You looked at her, wide-eyed. "Oh, stop it! I bet you and Tom spent the whole Sunday snuggled up together."

"Actually, I was nursing a hangover. He suffered having to listen to me complain and swear I'd never drink again."

"That won’t be the last time you’ll have to deal with a hangover if you keep going out with us." She smiled. "Can I join you? I’m starving, and I’ve got some assignments to do too. I’d love the company. Plus, your genius brain could help me out, if you’re up for it, of course!"

You pretend to think for a moment, pouting as if you're contemplating her idea, even though you already know the answer.

"Hmm, I don’t know..." She stops abruptly and stares at you, her caramel eyes pleading. "Alright! No need to look at me like a lost puppy," you say, laughing.

"My lost puppy eyes have gotten me far in life. Where are we going?"

"I was thinking of going to Joe's, do you know it?" She shakes her head. "No way! You're about to try the best carbonara in the world. Let’s go!"

"I have to admit, I haven't eaten this well in a while." Amber said while rubbing her belly.

"I told you."

Despite what people say around campus, Amber is one of the easiest people to talk to that you've ever met. Maybe it helps that you share a lot of mutual interests, but the way she keeps the conversation flowing, never letting an awkward silence settle between topics, proves once again that you shouldn't judge a book by its cover.

The girl with long red hair has a strong personality and big dreams. College wasn’t one of them, but for her parents, she pushes herself harder each day to keep going. She told you that ever since high school, she's had a passion for music and even joined the choir, but she always heard she had no future in it. Harsh words from people who should have been supporting her.

To her parents, a degree has always mattered more than genuine happiness.

She didn’t go into much detail, but she said she joined the cheerleading team to stay at least a little closer to what she enjoys. She knows the girls she hangs out with don’t have the best reputation, and as a result, she carries that same label. But she says she doesn’t care, that she’s happy with what she does, has fun, and has met some lovely people.

You don’t completely agree with the last part, since several people she hangs out with have proven not to be so great after all. But Amber has more contact with them than you do, so there’s not much to discuss.

During lunch, you gave her your full attention, but at the same time, you wondered why she wanted to spend this time with you. It wasn’t something you had imagined would happen. To you, she was just another girl you made friends with at a party, someone with whom you’d never exchange words again, like so many times before.

But Amber also seemed genuinely interested in what you had to say, asking about your major, what motivates you, and your interests.

She walked you back to your apartment and sat down on the floor near the coffee table, with a book and notebook open as she worked on an assignment. You sat down next to her, focusing on the page in front of you.

An hour later, Amber slammed the book shut and poked you with the tip of a pencil.

“I’m bored.”

"You know that phrase is something I hear regularly? In this same position."

"Do you have a lot of study dates?" She says, raising an eyebrow.

"It’s Tom, actually. We spend a lot of time studying together, and after a few minutes, he gets tired and says he’s bored."

"You two spend quite a bit of time together, don’t you? That’s how you got close."

"Yeah, you could say that. We worked on a project together and became friends. It ended up being a routine for him to be here."

"And now you’re dating."

"Oh, we don’t have a label yet. We’re... testing things out."

Amber watched you for a moment before speaking.

"Can I be honest?" You nodded. "It isn't strange to see Tom bringing a girl to one of those events and joining our group for the night. But most of the time, it doesn’t go beyond that. One night. You're his friend first and foremost, and you know how he behaves."

Amber sighed and looked at the table in front of her, her gaze unfocused.

"I don’t want you to end up like one of those girls. I know we barely know each other, but I like you, and I pushed aside my ego to get closer to you because... you seem real. It’s ridiculous, but I don’t know what I’m saying anymore."

"Amber, it’s okay." Your hand found hers and held it. "Take your time."

"I and Tom are friends. He’s one of the few people I can really talk to, you know? Like I said, the people I hang out with aren’t bad, but Tom is genuine. He doesn’t hide, and he is who he is, even if people talk about him." Her eyes returned to your face, and you finally noticed the tears forming. "And he talked about you. He told me how much you support him and what you do together, how you talk about everything and really listen to each other."

"I never had the chance to get to know you before, and my fear was that you would treat me poorly because of who I am, even knowing you wouldn't do that." She took a deep breath to regain her composure. "And when you showed up at the party and I got to talk to you, I understood Tom. I understood why he keeps you around. And today you took me to lunch at a new place, brought me to your home, and helped me with an assignment that isn't even part of your course. And we barely know each other."

"Amber, I did that because I like you too. It’s all good!"

She sniffled and released your hand, bringing them to her face to dry her tears.

"That was intense, and now I’m embarrassed." She started to get up, and you followed her. "I need to go."

"Amber, wait. You don’t have to leave."

"Y/N, I need to." She quickly packed up all the materials she used back into the bag she was carrying. "That was more than I expected."

Knowing you wouldn't be able to change her mind, you just watched as she gathered her things.

"Amber, wait." You tried one last time as she approached the door to leave. She paused but didn’t look back. "Do you want to go shopping on Friday?"

Her shoulders trembled slightly, and she turned to you with a shy smile on her face.

"I would love to."

Tom was sitting at his desk in his room while you were lying on his soft comforter on the bed.

"Were you two out to lunch together?" he asked.

"Yeah, she asked if she could join me, and I didn’t say no. It was actually pretty nice."

"Until she freaked out in the middle of your living room."

"It wasn’t a freak-out." You sat up on the bed defensively, staring at him. "She vented. I didn’t understand much, but the emotional weight of her words… it was a lot."

"Amber is pretty straightforward."

"I don’t think so. She still has a lot bottled up inside her, and I don’t think she’s going to share it anytime soon."

"Y/N, she’s not a patient. Don’t overanalyze."

"I know that," you replied. "She said you two are friends. Has she talked to you about her parents?"

He raised both hands in a gesture of surrender.

"Let’s stop right there. That’s not our business."

"Ah, okay, sorry." You flopped back onto the bed, arms spread wide. "But did you know she said you talk a lot about me?"

"Did she?" He stood up from his chair. "What did she say?"

"Nothing too specific. But I think it’s problematic because you’ve created a fantasy of me for her."

"Me?"

"Yes! I’m not that special, and the way she talked… you really need to watch your words or it’s going to seem like I’m the center of your universe."

"Ha! You would like that, wouldn't you?" He gets up from the chair and sits on the edge of the bed.

"That's your life wish, Holland. Not mine," you joked back.

"So you think you’re that special, huh?" he says.

"I know I am. If I weren’t, I wouldn’t be right here now, and you wouldn’t be talking about me to other friends."

"You hurt my feelings talking like that. I don't have such a cold heart." he says, placing his hands over his chest.

"Aww, poor thing. Tommy gets his feelings hurt when he hears the truth." You reply, pouting and sitting again to face him properly.

"Why are you so sassy, huh?" He says, laughing and leaning closer.

"Life taught me to be this way."

"Stop that," he says, chuckling. "A few hours with Amber and you’re already just like her."

"We're friends. We have a date together on Friday!"

"I don’t know what to think, but I’m glad."

"Yeah, it's going to be fun," you smile.

"So, I've been thinking… actually, I heard some comments today about last Saturday."

"Yeah, I heard about it too. Apparently, you can still be the talk of the campus at any occasion."

"Oh, Y/N, you know not everyone cares about that. The ones who talk the most are the ones close to you or who want to be."

"I know, I was one of those people, remember? You can be sure I didn’t care at all about what you did or didn’t do until we had to work together."

"Yeah, if it weren't for social psychology, we might never have even exchanged a hello." That wasn’t exactly true. "Anyway, it turns out everyone thinks it was just that. Just a fling."

"Hm, what do you suggest?"

Tom smirked and pulled his phone out of his pocket.

"Time to make it Instagram official."

"How do you want me?" you asked, and he stared at you, a new smirk appearing. "Not like that, you perv! You know what I meant."

He laughed and got up, offering his hand to help you up from the bed.

"I'll lead you," he says.

You both walked over to the floor-to-ceiling window in his room, the sunset bathing the space in natural light. Tom positioned you in front of him and wrapped one arm around your shoulders.

"Okay, now turn your face to the left. Pretend you’re distracted." You did as he asked.

Tom's free hand held the phone in front of both of you.

"Got it. I think we have the picture for the official announcement," he said a moment later, pointing the phone to catch your attention.

In the photo, Tom's face was resting on your head, his arm wrapped around you while you pretended to look at something in the distance.

"Tom, do you think this is good?"

"What? What do you mean?"

"This looks so forced."

"What a lie. I've never taken a more perfect couple photo." You put your hands on your head when you heard him say that.

"Thomas… you've never taken a couple's photo in your life!"

Tom might have posed with countless girls at parties and other events, but none of them carried any deeper feeling.

"Well, it's what we have." He clicked a bit more on the phone screen. "Done, I even tagged you. Are you going to repost?" He said just as you heard the sound of a notification coming from your phone on his bed.

"We should have taken another one."

"Y/N, then it will look forced. It needs to be natural."

"Ha, and you think this is natural?"

"Stop complaining."

You huffed and returned to his bed, grabbing your phone and opening the app.

"Hey, it's okay if you don't want to repost it because you didn't like it…" he says lightly.

"That's not it, Tommy." You meet his gaze, lowering your phone. "It's just that all my acquaintances are going to see it. And it will be real. My family, friends from home. I know that was the plan and what we agreed on, but I just don’t know…"

Tom moved closer to you and cupped your face in his hands.

"Hey, any time you want to stop, that's fine! I’ve already told you I’m not going to force you into anything. Just say the word, and it's over."

You let out a breath and rested your head against his chest, and he wrapped his arms around you in a comforting embrace.

"You too, Tommy. At any moment." You said, your voice muffled by his shirt pressing against your face.

A few seconds later, you slipped out of his arms and reposted the photo, blocking and silencing your phone immediately afterward.

"See? That wasn’t so hard. We’ll deal with the consequences later." He laughed softly. "Now let’s go, we need to get there early if we want to leave early."

Even though it was a Monday, Tom had managed to convince you to go out with some of his friends to celebrate the start of the new game season. The only condition you had set was not staying out too late. They had decided to meet up at a bowling alley for the night.

When you both arrived, Harrison and his date for the night Jessie along with Tyler, and his girlfriend Mabel were already there, having reserved a lane for the game.

Harrison started the game, followed by Tyler and Mabel, who asked her boyfriend for help with the only move needed in bowling. Next up was Jessie, who made the same request to Harrison—good first-date strategy.

"Ok, smartiepants, your turn," Tom said turning to you, pointing to the lane.

You got up from the couch in your section and walked over to the platform to choose the ball you'd use.

"Tommy, you're not being very smart right now," Tyler said, pointing in your direction.

"What do you mean?"

"Be a gentleman; your girlfriend is about to bowl. Don't you think you should help her?"

Tom laughed loudly. "My girl? Oh, she doesn't need help. She knows what to do."

And as if you sensed his words even without hearing them, you knocked down all 10 pins in one go, making him shout in celebration.

"That's what I'm talking about!"

The night continued, and Harrison emerged as the winner of the game, receiving victory kisses from Jessie. Before heading out, everyone decided to grab a quick snack at the same bowling alley.

After a while of laughter, you said goodbye to the group and everyone went their separate ways.

"I have to admit, these people aren't so bad." You say as you buckle your seatbelt and Tom starts the car.

"Yeah, Tyler and Harrison are my closest friends, which is why I wanted you to come tonight. I know some of the guys on the team can be jerks, but a few of them are worth it."

"The girls were really nice too, even with their performance of not knowing how to play and getting all cozy with the guys," you say, laughing.

"I don't know about Jessie, but Mabel has been with Tyler for a while, so it's likely you'll see her again," he replied.

"Hm, I wish Amber had come," you said, looking down at your hands in your lap.

"Haz said she was busy, that's why she couldn't make it."

"I see…"

"Hey." Tom called your attention, placing his hand over yours. "Don't think too much about it; that's Amber for you. She has a strong personality and is very intense. And she gets scared by things she can't control."

A few minutes later, Tom parked in front of your apartment.

"Have you checked your phone?" he asked, and you shook your head in response.

"It's been on silent since we left your place."

"Y/N, I'm here for you. You know that."

"I really appreciate you, Tom. I know you have your reasons for being part of this craziness we've gotten into, but seriously, thank you."

"Anytime, smartiepants." You smiled at him.

"I'm going now."

Before you could open the car door, Tom held your hand. "Wait, Y/N."

"What?" You looked at him.

"I need to ask you… about the party, what happened at the party." he said. "I don't… what was that?"

"Tom, I'm not understanding."

"We… we kissed."

"Oh, about that." You looked away. "I know you didn't expect it, but… when I came back from the bathroom with Amber, everyone was saying you had gone somewhere with Taylor, and when I went to look for you, I bumped into her, and she started saying all sorts of things, and I wasn't exactly in my most sober state either."

He didn’t respond and let go of your hand.

"I know we hadn’t agreed on anything, but it felt like the right thing to do at the moment. I needed to prove that we were together there."

Tom continued in silence, staring at the road ahead.

"I'm sorry. We talked briefly about this, and I thought…"

"So it was an act?" he asked. "Just to prove we were together?"

"Well, yes. It’s not what we usually do when we’re together," you replied uncertainly. "But Tom, if that bothered you, let’s set some boundaries. It's funny because you joked about it yourself and…"

"No, it's fine. You don’t need to. Just… I'll see you tomorrow, ok?" he said.

"Alright, drive safe," you said before getting out of the car and watching him drive away.

As you lay down and finally allowed yourself to check your phone, you felt a mix of curiosity and apprehension.

Notifications began to pop up on your phone, and you quickly realized that the repost of the photo with Tom had generated a lot of attention. Messages from friends and acquaintances started flooding your feed, and you couldn’t help but smile at the positive reactions.

Your sister replied with a simple "WTF?"

You couldn’t avoid feeling a mix of excitement and nervousness. Your relationship with Tom was becoming more real every day, and it brought a whirlwind of emotions.

Among the messages, one notification caught your attention: a direct message from Amber. “I saw the photo! I’m so happy for you. Let’s talk soon?”

You smiled as you read the message and felt relieved. But one notification, in particular, caught your attention even more.

Sean: Seems like I wasn’t wrong after all.

Seeing that message from Sean made your heart skip a beat. You hadn’t expected him to reach out, especially not like this.

TAGLIST: @feelinglikeineedlotsofnaps @un06 @lnmp89 @hoodharlow @let-me-luve-you @erule @smoofine @smile2345 @itsdoni @helen-on-earth @kagtobis @appleypi @jennifersworldsblog @marajillana @hufflepuff-n-fluff @aol19 @milasexutoire @watarmelon212 @miniaturetreecollectorfan-blog @twsssmlmaa @drquinnzel0217qqqqqqqqqqq @purplerose291 @princessria127 @jackiehollanderr

[calebghostin]

𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐲 𝟒 𝐮

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hi! ty for liking my other posts :) heres a little (ooc oops) college au w/ exbf caleb cus i feel like writin it! send me requests!!! hes kinda toxic in this soz. inspired by charli xcx's party 4 u cus its trending and a longtime fav of mine from her! the yearning is also so caleb-core xx enjoy! not proofread lol

wordcount: 1.4k words

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You hadn’t heard from Caleb in a long, long time. You had spent a few years together in your early years of college, even dating briefly. His hard stern control and possessiveness cast a dark cloud over your bond, and you broke it off. But, now… fleeting glances and heated gazes were all you could give to him. Caleb was devising a plan to get himself back into your life – by any means. Including a party to ‘celebrate the end of an academic year’, or so you thought.

Your best-friend lights up over the coffee perched in her hand, a small gasp escaping her. 

“Oh, I totally forgot to tell you! There’s a party at Zayne's this weekend.”

You chuckle, a brow raising at the idea of Zayne – the epitome of solitude – holding a party with his peers. 

“...Zayne? Is hosting a party?” You scoff and agree to join your girlfriends, curiosity outweighing your suspicion. 

That is, until on the bike back home you spot a certain med-student. 

“Zayne!” You call, arm greeting him and legs scotting on the asphalt to pause your biking. 

“Hey, it’s been a while.” 

You nod solemnly, the harsh reminder of time set between you both. When you were with Caleb, it wasn’t uncommon of you to go over to his and Zayne’s shared place to hangout. And make out secretly in his room. But that wasn’t your focus right now, no, no, no–! 

“Caleb’s been askin’ about you, how have you been?”

He starts, tone unwavering but almost cautious. 

“Yeah, yeah. Um. I’ve been good!” You cough, cautiously glancing around the campus park, nervous he would appear.

“Glad to hear it. Were you heading home? I can accompany you.” 

You smile, glad to be close to Zayne once more. 

“That’d be nice, Zayne.” You hop off the bike and walk it with one hand on the rhinestone handle-bar (a gift from Caleb who loved to tinker with your belongings and customise them), the other wrapped around Zayne’s offered arm. 

The walk was peacefully quiet but you had to know: 

“Is it true you’re hosting a party this weekend?” You gaze up at him as he adjusts his glasses, lost in deep thought. 

“Sure.” 

“Sure…? What– Zayne!” 

The tall lab-coated man just simply… walks away. His pace quickens, in a sudden, sudden rush to get back to his place. 

Where Caleb was sat on the shared sofa, phone going through group chats, seeing everyone buzz about the ‘bash’ at Zayne’s. 

But he didn’t care, he had to know if you were coming. 

A text from your friend chimes in the chat: 

“We’ll all be there! ;) @Caleb” 

The emphasis on ‘all’ isn’t lost on him. He smiles in anticipation, beginning to wonder about what you’ll say, what you’ll wear– 

His thoughts take a slightly darker turn as Zayne enters and his icy voice cuts from the corridor: 

“What is your motive?” 

“Good afternoon to you, Zaynie. Cute you think you can walk her home," Caleb drawls dismissively, a hand waving, shutting the door behind Zayne. 

“She left you, Caleb. She thinks this is my ‘party’, not yours!” 

He blinks, rolls his eyes and sighs. 

“It isn’t mine either. It’s hers.” 

‘Always been hers…’ He mumbles. 

The two part, clearly in no mood for games such as this, such as you. 

A few days later, you shake off your nerves while touching up your mascara. It’s been a long time since your last party, and even then, you had Caleb to protect you. Your heart aches at the thought of him, even more knowing it shouldn’t. It’s fine! He was out of town anyways, right? He always had some sort of business in Skyhaven, you heard from the grapevine – your girlfriends and a bottle of moscato that always allowed secrets to spill. 

The house is just the same as you remember it, way too classy for two college students to be renting, but who were you to complain? You find your way to the kitchen, manage to greet Zayne who looks nervous – you can’t place the reason. Skipping to the pool, you and your friends place a few of your belongings on a pool chair and you remove your top, shrugging it off your shoulders. 

And when you turn back to face the pool, Caleb is standing on the opposite side of the pool. 

A curt nod and blazing eyes meet yours, two drinks in his hand. 

Was he with someone else? 

Good for him, I guess– 

Your heart pulses at the thought, were you that… easy to get over? 

He beckons you over with the cup. 

You shouldn’t. 

You really shouldn’t. 

He was… bad for you! 

But, he’s here… now. 

You walk over, swallowing nervously before starting: 

“Hey. Nice party, huh?” 

“Glad you like it,” He chuckles deeply, eyes stormy, as if enjoying a joke to himself. 

He offers you the cup of punch, its strong smell hitting you, your favourite juice, you notice. 

Huh, what a coincidence, you didn’t know Zayne liked this too.

“I made it.” He concludes, reading your mind. 

“Oh! Nice. Um, how’s Skyhaven?” 

“How’d you know about that, princess?” He places it so casually, but smirks. 

What was he doing? 

“You can’t call me that.” You whisper shakily, voice practically drowned out from the bass that spilled from inside. You turn around to notice your friends had gone back inside. You felt stranded, alone in your swimwear, with your ex-boyfriend who you definitely did not want back… (you did) who was calling you princess. 

A wave of nostalgia and want churns you. 

“Why not, princess?” He taunts. Drink placed down, and hands coming to toy with the straps of your swimwear. 

“Bows, cute. F’me?” 

“Caleb, I didn’t even know you’d be here…” 

He nods, eyes dimming, mouth curling inwards. 

“I know, I…” He inhales deeply. 

“I threw this party for you, y’know.” 

His eyes don’t leave yours, gauging your reaction. 

“What? But everyone said–” 

“Zayne owned me… a favour.” One corner of his lips smirk up, “It’s yours. All of it, any of it, anything you want.” He murmurs, hands trailing down your shoulders to your palms, connecting your hands. 

For a moment, you realise he isn’t talking about the party. 

“Anything you want,” He repeats, softer. 

Your eyes travel down to your connected palms and a soft glimmer from the moonlight twinkles from his neck– 

His necklace. 

The one you gifted him. 

You grab at it, charms clanking and flickering underneath your fingers. “You kept this?” 

“Of course I did, you gave it to me.” 

You chuckle, and feel confidence course through you. 

You tug at the chain, forcing his head to bend downwards and connect to your lips. He reciprocates within milliseconds, this is second nature to him after all, being with you. 

Your limbs grab and tangle together, moving backwards quickly, so quickly that neither of you can realise— 

A splash sounds through the back pool, your bodies falling in together. 

The lights of the pool illuminate Caleb underwater as you open your eyes, ignoring the chemical sting. 

Soft purple lights his floating hair, like a halo. His hand, so rough and usually calloused, grips onto yours. He tugs you up, into his arms. You gasp for air, blinking away the water at your eyes. Caleb laughs and wipes your hair away from your face. 

You look down to see the wet, pressured white tee now stuck onto him. You poke his bicep. 

“Hot.” 

“Thanks, princess.” 

“What does this mean…” You ask. 

“Whatever you want it to mean, I miss you. I was hoping you’d come through to this so, so bad. To see you wearin’ this little number…” He tugs again at your bows, with apples embroidered in the middle of them, “I couldn’t help myself.” 

“I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to resist you Caleb–” 

He leans in, your pointer finger pushes him back, ‘booping’ his nose. 

“But, if we’re gonna do this, I need to know you’ll let me have space and, and, won’t be possessive, or– Caleb! Ah, stop…” You trail off, losing coherency of your words as his hands find purchase under your swimwear and in your hair – he’s everywhere.  

“Of course, party girl makes the rules after all, right?” He adjusts his hand holding you up from below your thighs and carries you out of the pool with one singular hand – he’s so strong – and wraps a towel around you. Kisses you sweetly as he promises: 

“I’ll be here, for every party, for every rendezvous, whatever you need princess.” 

You turn to the window, suddenly aware of the glass panelling of the house – surely nobody saw you make out with your… 

Your friends all squeeze up against the glass, a frantic thumbs up and “WINE NIGHT!” mouthed from others. 

Oops, your party, your rules… right?

[tea-and-secrets]

i’ve lost all motivation or desire to do anything except mindlessly being on my phone. i’m supposed to be getting good grades in school, or finishing my college applications, or cleaning my room, or doing literally anything productive, but i just can’t get myself to do anything. i’m disappointed in myself for being a failure, and i’m sure my parents are even more disappointed in me. they had so much hope for me, they sacrificed so much, and i’ve paid them back by being a lazy dumbass bitch. i wish i didn’t have to argue with my own mind to get something done. i just wish i could disappear; leave everything behind and not worry about it anymore.

.

[hearts4chriss]

Man, I cannot believe I’m writing this

I came on Tumblr to start writing for the triplets because those are my guys like I love them with all my heart and I still do but mainly I wanted to meet more writers that look like me and I’ve met so many of y’all. Y’all are so so talented and so sweet and so kind and some of the greatest people and friends I’ve met 

I cannot believe how far I’ve come on here with y’all. You guys gave me an amazing experience. I’ve met and talked to so many of y’all on a personal level and I’m so so thankful to have become friends with y’all on here.

While, this is my final post. I do not have any plans to deactivate yet as of right now I will probably keep my account up and when I log out, I will put it in my bio or I will post it, but I am no longer writing or making any Fics.

It is not because I have lost motivation. It is simply because it is toxic on here and mentally I am in a different headspace than when I was a high school senior in January. I am now going to be a freshman in college at Harvard university and my focus elsewhere you guys mean the fucking world to me you guys are so fucking amazing and y’all are so so intelligent and don’t let anybody tell y’all otherwise because y’all are that shit

You guys are my babies and I wish I could give all of you guys real hugs because I love y’all so bad. I really really am going to miss y’all on here and I’m sorry I could not fulfil all of my requests, but I’m so happy with the experience I had with my writing, I do not want to deactivate because I know how many people like to read my stories but eventually, I will be logging out of this account and leaving permanently. I do not know when that’ll be. I am no longer posting on here.

And when I do log out, I do not plan on coming back. You can DM me for now and we can talk but when I log out, I will post it and that’s the last yall will hear from me.

I love y’all so so bad thank you for everything

love, neveah 🩷

@hoesformatt @nickgetsmewetter @babyddolly @worldsanna @bratzforchris @sturniololoves @zylaheartsmatt

[dragonfly0808]

college advice? i’m starting in the fall 😭

oh FUCK

Kay, so, I’m no professional here but I am about to pass into my 6th semester, so will hopefully soon be wrapping up my 3rd year of college so here’s some of advice

First off, go in the mornings, if you have a chance to do your schedule, go in the morning, it’s so fucking heavy to have to go in the evenings, did that once, never again

try to find a website or blog where students can give teachers reviews, these exist for most colleges and while it can be very hard to build your schedule based on the best teachers and I wouldn’t recommend doing that, it can help you be mentally prepared and know what each teacher values most ahead of time

always have smth to entertain yourself. You WILL have teachers who don’t show up or constantly cancel classes and while its fun using that time to catch up with friends, you should take a book or smth with you to keep yourself entertained during down time

if you have AFI’s (I have no fucking clue what they’re called in english but they’re activities, conferences, talks, outings, stuff like that) check how many you can do per semester and keep up with them, don’t leave them till last minute. For example, I need 14 to finish my career and can do up till 4 valid ones per semester but can only do them till my 7th semester. So check on that if you do have them as a requirement as well

Make sure you check out every part of your campus to know the best hangout spots. This is mostly just for yourself and to not get lost.

Hang out at your library if you have one, check out what they have even if you don’t particularly plan to use that many books, it can help motivate you and find more passion for your career if you’re feeling down or having doubts.

learn how to properly reference articles (perplexity is a great tool to find references)

make sure the teachers at least recognize you and, I would recommend to limit yourself to a certain number of classes you can miss. I try to limit myself to skip 3 classes from each teacher and try to not miss at all, the teachers recognizing me as someone who always goes has given me second chances and opportunities for extra points.

ALWAYS DO OPTIONAL PROJECTS FOR EXTRA POINTS, even if you feel confident in the subject, better to be safe than sorry

carry a cardigan or a light sweater and a small umbrella. You never know what teacher is gonna put the AC like it’s antartica and an umbrella can save you from sunburns and unexpected rain

carry headache pills or any medication you use semi-frequently, also a small utensils kit cause who likes using disposable utensils when you can carry your own + it’s better for the environment, also a hair tie

have an ‘emergency kit’, I have one that barely takes up a lot of space in my backpack and I am just now having to refill it 5 semesters in, I have mini deodorant, a small toothbrush/toothpaste I’ve never actually used, mini wet wipes, mini hand sanitizer, mini perfume, mini brush, toilet paper, band-aids, pads and kleenex.

^ these last 3 are cause my mama taught me to always be prepared and cause I personally can be a bit paranoid, I’m the mom-friend who always has anything anyone could ever need :) so those are according to the type of person you are. I also carry an UNO card game for when multiple teachers cancel on us (yes my backpack is very heavy but the paranoia can’t catch me if I’m prepared)

If you’re propense to low-sugar do NOT skip breakfast and try to carry a small snack, or in general always carry a small snack

if your career involves having to go to the laboratory, LISTEN TO THE INTERNS/LAB ASSISTANTS, half the time, they’ll know more than the teacher

remember, when it comes to group projects, you don’t have friends, you have classmates. Someone can be a great friend but an awful classmate and I am not risking a grade over a lazy friend, prepare yourself to separate those 2

try to figure out what to listen to when doing hw or studying, me personally, classical music (specifically cello music from the barroque period) really helps me focus

ALWAYS DO YOUR HOMEWORK, those are some of the easiest points to get

Finally, don’t be afraid to decorate your backpack! One of the funnest things of college to me (cause I was at a strict school for middle school and spent highschool in pandemic) has been to decorate my backpack with pins!

I’ve found a great thing about college is that genuienly no one cares about your interests and you can freely express yourself without fear of being bullied or ridiculed. Everyone is far too tired or focused to care. At least that has been my experience so far, be ridiculous if you like

I have ATLA pins, an asexual flag, spider-gwen, a matching carebear with my bestie, the school mascot and a dinasour (still looking for a winx pin)

I think that’s all I can come up with for now, so yeah, hope this helps and best of luck bestie!

[ymiahha]

🍓🚬 | strawberries and cigarettes always taste like you. (Sanji x Fem!Reader fanfic – · ep. 1v)

📑 – · | 𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐢𝐞𝐰: sanji attends a party to find someone to replace his ex with, only to find out that not a lot of women he saw there felt good enough. but everything changes when he meets a pretty lady who asked to light her cigarette...

❗ – · | 𝐝𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐬: this whole fanfiction is based on the song “strawberries and cigarettes” by troye sivan. this story takes places in a college au. it will be told in sanji’s pov. this ep is sfw but contains two suggestive jokes! contains cursing and smoking. sanji’s family is complete here. y/n will appear like a mary sue, but, in later eps, will be shown that she isn’t. hopefully not too ooc.

🗨️ – · | 𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫: hiii! 😭 so um i’ve kind of lost a bit of motivation, some personal stuff happened and i was unable to upload for a few days 💔 can’t guarantee that the interval of my uploads will shorten but i’ll try to stay as motivated as possible :> this is quite short and barely any dialogue, it’s sort of just a backstory about why things turned out that way for sanji but yeah dw next chapter will definitely have more action!

📁 – · | 𝐜𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧: 𝐞𝐩. 𝟏; 𝐞𝐩. 𝟐; 𝐞𝐩. 𝟑

After that Sunday night, the five days that followed it felt like a movie. In a half good half bad way.

Me and Y/n exchanged contacts. We haven’t been texting much due to lack of time, but when we do, the conversations are so short it becomes alluring, maybe even addicting.

When I returned home last sunday, my family was unfortunately already there. My mom questioned where I went off to and I just said I went out for a smoke. She’s aware that I smoke but obviously, as a mother, she disapproves of it.

We scheduled to meet again this Saturday; this time, she promised she was gonna be more mindful with her keys. That conversation was held when we were still smoking on the curb, when everything still felt bearable.

But after our didn’t-go-to-plan but overall successful date, I snapped back to reality and started to relive those long nights again. Nights when I tried to focus on studying but was still unable to throw away that one picture of us. Nights when all I could think of was what she did and why she did that. Nights when I was begging for some kind of sign that it was going to be okay, sooner or later.

But no sign came. That’s why I resorted to smoking. Ever since my dad accidentally left a small box on the kitchen counter, I decided to give it a try. I then realized how much it put me at ease; it numbed my pain and momentarily made me forget my unbearable thoughts…

Attending that dumb party and getting to meet such a wonderful girl changed the way I see life. I started daydreaming about her, admiring her casual but comfy personality. She seemed such girlfriend material… Sigh. I guess I’m in love again.

I was thinking about Y/n again when my phone dinged. It was a special kind of ding. It was the notification sound I set just for our conversation. My face lit up and my mood immediately lifted as I scrambled to grab my phone.

It was Friday today, meaning tomorrow, we’d finally be meeting each other. And this time, we’re meeting somewhere closer to my area since she is the one with the car. Kind of embarrassing, in my opinion— like, I’m the guy. I should be the one driving her to places.

We decided to meet outside Queenside Mall, which was just a seven minute walk from my house. Much more convenient than Akebono Fields, but hey, I’d run a mile for this amazing girl. She’s just that stunning.

I opened my phone and clicked the notification I received from her.

Y/n

Hey, Sanji.

Can we meet at around half an hour til midnight?

I bit my lip, my fingers hovering over the keyboard. 11:30 PM… I’ll have to really be sneaky. My father’s work is during the night. I can’t disappoint this girl.

Me

Sure

Y/n

Cool :)

Don’t forget to bring a jacket or something btw, it’ll be cold by the time we get there

See you then <3

Me

Can I ask why we’re changing the time, though?

Y/n

The road is all ours by then. I’ll give you a ride that’ll last for a lifetime. ;)

This girl, bruh. She was teasing the hell out of me. And I think it just made me want her even more. As a girlfriend, I mean. Damn it, Sanji.

[cozy-the-overlord]

Free Fall

Summary: Tony Stark arranges for an Avengers Teambuilding Day at a local amusement park. Loki had been hoping to avoid it -- he's had enough thrills to last a lifetime, he has no desire to seek out more -- but you and your endearing enthusiasm for roller coasters convince him to come along. However, the free fall drop tower you start out with turns out to be a bit more thrilling than he bargained for.

Word Count: 3,482

Pairing: Loki x Gender Neutral Reader

A/N: Drags self out of the grave and awkwardly waves

So it's been a minute since I posted lol. Those of you who follow may be aware that I recently graduated from college with the Final Semester From Hell that involved my computer hard drive dying on me in class and causing me to lose not only forty pages of my honors thesis two weeks before it was due, but also almost every WIP I had been working on in the past four years because I am an idiot who chronically forgets to back things up :D I did make it through college, but between stress, burnout, depression, and the death of any motivation to work on anything because of having to restart from the beginning for all of my projects, I went a while without writing anything. But I'm slowly getting back into it -- I have several projects in the works and I'm hoping to get back to posting more regularly. This fic was a short piece that I had started prior to the computer death that I had a lot of physical notes on so they weren't lost when my hard drive decided to yeet itself into the sun. I'm not entirely happy with it, but honestly it feels so good to finally finish something that I don't care.

Anyways, sorry for the obnoxious A/N. Thank you so much for reading!

Warnings: PTSD, flashbacks, panic attack, a bit of motion sickness?

Tags: @lucywrites02 @gaitwae @whatafuckingdumbass @the-emo-asgardian @imnotrevealingmyname @electroma89 @lokislittlesigyn @moumouton4 @theredrenard @justdontmindmetm @lostgreekgod @naterson

If you want to be tagged, feel free to send an ask/message :) (I also realize that this taglist is Old so if I need to update it please let me know)

Read it on Ao3!

Standing in the shadow of the great tower, heart thudding in his throat, Loki is suddenly aware that he’s made an enormous mistake.

Next to him, Stark whistles. “This is what you usually start with?”

You grin up at the spire, a massive construction of electric green cutting through the cloudless sky. Two elevators, one on either side, are creeping slowly up the length of the tower. They linger at the top for just a moment before plunging back down to Earth, their occupants screaming. Loki feels ill just watching, but you’re practically vibrating in place. “It’s good to get the blood pumping.”

He can’t bring himself to look at you.

It’s your fault that he’s here. Loki hadn’t planned to come today at all. A day spent outside in the sweltering summer sun, following Stark’s gaggle of misfits onto various machines designed to fling mortals from side to side to simulate the feeling of a near death experience? Loki couldn’t imagine anything more torturous. Thor’s begging and cajoling received nothing in response. No, he hadn’t the slightest intention of coming today, not until last night, when he came across you restocking the main refrigerator.

“Are you excited for tomorrow?” you had asked as you arranged rows of Red Bull on the top shelf. “I can’t wait to take you guys around Rapid Rails—I’ve been begging Mr. Stark to do a teambuilding day there ever since he hired me.”

Your eagerness caught him off guard— as Stark’s personal assistant, you had been present at all of his godforsaken teambuilding events, but Loki had never known you to be particularly excited about any of them. “I … I wasn’t aware you had such an attachment to it.”

“Oh yeah—I grew up just down the street from there!” You beamed at him, breaking down the cardboard box you had used to carry the cans. “We used to have season passes – they were way cheaper when I was a kid – and we’d just go there to hang out all the time. Gosh it was so fun. And now I get to go for work!” You let out a merry laugh. “I guess some things never change, right?”

Loki huffed a soft chuckle. He had never seen you like this before, practically bubbling over in excitement. It was … rather endearing. “I suppose not.”

“You are coming, right? Thor said you hadn’t made up your mind yet.”

Were the circumstances different, Loki might have scoffed. Hadn’t made up your mind yet—Norns, his brother lived in denial. Instead though, he hesitated. “I … I’m afraid I hadn’t planned on it.”

“Really?” The way your face fell actually hurt his chest. “Why not?”

“I—” He glanced away, pressing his lips together. “I’m not sure I’m one for your roller coasters,” he said, finally. “You’d likely have a better time without me there.” It was an attempt at lightheartedness, but you only seemed more disappointed.

“Oh, that’s not true at all! I was really looking forward to—” you stopped suddenly, and when Loki looked up again, you were biting your lip with a nervous laugh. “I mean, it would be really fun if you came with us. But it’s okay if you don’t want to.”

“I suppose I could come, if you so desire.” He hoped he sounded nonchalantly cool, and that you couldn’t see the way his heart fluttered at the idea that you might want him there. “I wouldn’t wish to let you down.”

“Oh, I mean—” You looked away, the light from the refrigerator silhouetting your frame. “I don’t want to force you, if you don’t want to. You shouldn’t do it just for me.”

“No, I …” He inhaled, then smiled. “I think I would like to join you.”

And so here he is, at the base of this great metal monstrosity, intently studying the sign outside of the line entrance to avoid Thor’s knowing smirk. His brother has never worn self-satisfaction well.

DEATH DROP: THE TALLEST AND FASTEST DROP TOWER ON THE EAST COAST

 The description is illustrated with a photograph of two people strapped to their seats, mouths wide in mid-scream as their hair flies every which way. Loki lets out a shaky exhale as he reads. The tower, it claims, is 400 feet tall. It reaches top speeds of 85 miles per hour. The ride itself lasts about 90 seconds in total. The measuring stand besides the entrance indicates that participants must be at least 48 inches tall.

400 feet. That doesn’t sound too terrible, he tells himself. The concept of a foot as a unit of measurement is still something he struggles to wrap his head around, but he knows that Stark Tower stands at over a thousand. So that’s not too bad. 400 feet would be a drop in the bucket, really, compared to …

No. He pushes the thought down, back into the dark recesses of his memory. None of that. Not today.

Stark smirks at him. “You’re looking green, Tommy Wiseau.”

Loki swallows, straining to maintain his stiff mask of composure. It’s bad enough to have Stark reveling in his discomfort, but now you’re looking over at him too, brow furrowed in concern, and he wishes he could melt away on the spot. “I’m quite fine.”

“Of course he is!” Thor booms, slapping his shoulder with a hearty thwack that does nothing for Loki’s stomach. “We’ve fallen from much higher heights, haven’t we, brother?”

Weightless. Breathless. Engulfed by inky nothingness, the air so thin he can’t even scream —

Loki’s smile hurts. “Yes, very true.”

“You don’t have to go, Loki,” you interject. “It’s totally okay— I have friends who love roller coasters and refuse to touch this ride. It’s a lot.”

He knows you mean it as reassurance, but he can’t stand the way you’re looking at him, as if he were a frightened child, too fragile to be brought along. Are you regretting having convinced him to change his mind? Do you feel that he’s only holding you back? Somehow, the idea that you no longer want him here is almost as sickening as the thought of the fall.

Loki huffs a breath. No. He will prove himself worthy of your coaster. “I assure you, I am fine.” His voice is more strained than he’d prefer it to be. “Let’s get on with it, shall we?”

…

The attendant seems rather starstruck as he ushers the group onto the ride—he stumbles and stammers through the explanation of the seating arrangements and the harness. Loki’s not really listening as he follows you to the left side of the cart, trying not to ignore the buzzing that seems to be settling behind his ears.

You smile up at him. “Would you rather sit on the side or in the middle?”

He frowns. “Does it make a difference?”

“Well, personally I don’t think so, but I know some people who get scared of heights think it’s easier to sit in the middle.”

“I’m not scared of heights.” The words come out far too quickly to sound believable, and he curses inwardly at himself. “I can sit on the side.”

“Are you sure?”  You eye him uncertainly. “It’s okay if you—"

“I’m quite capable of managing such a seat.” He sits before you have the chance to question him again.

The seat is rather tight—Loki wonders if that’s intentional, or if it’s simply built with a smaller frame in mind. In the cart off to the right, he can hear Thor fumbling about with the attendant, and he chuckles despite himself. If he’s finding it to be a bit of a squeeze, he can’t imagine the troubles his bulky brother must be having.

It’s a momentary reprieve from his darker thoughts, and Loki is actually smiling when you warn him to sit back against the seat.

“The harness is going to be coming down soon.”

“What?”

You motion to the contraption above the cart, two plastic green masses shaped like upside down u’s that hover above your heads like the top of a clam shell. “It sits over you and keeps you from flying out of the cart.” You let out a small laugh. “It’s like the harnesses on the Quinjets, but way less cool. They also have little handles that you can hold on to if you want.”

Loki is eyeing the harnesses uncertainly. “What do you mean they’ll be coming down soon?”

“You used to have to pull it down yourself, but they have it all programmed now.” A great mechanical creak cracks through the air, and you press yourself against the back of the seat. “Oh, here it comes now!”

He frowns, mimicking your movement to sit as far back as he can. The green restraint descends slowly over his head, with a metallic groan that does not give him much faith in the construction of this monstrosity. He expects it to stop once it was hovering over his torso, but it continues until it’s pressed snuggly against his chest, pinning him to the seat. The attendant is saying something over the intercom, but Loki barely registers it over the feeling of the restraint. It’s … it’s not a painful sensation, but the firmness with which it holds … he’s been restrained before. Little flames of memory spark in the corners of his mind, flames he can’t seem to douse no matter how hard he tries.

Get it off. Get it off. Get it off.

He gives an apprehensive tug on the metal handles that now rest on either shoulder, a tug which quickly turns into a hard yank. The harness does not move. His mouth has gone dry.

“Loki?” you’re frowning at him, your head only barely visible through your own harness. “What’s wrong? Are you okay?”

You’re not bothered by the restraint. Of course you aren’t—how many times did you say you’ve ridden this ride? It’s fine. It’s fine. Goodness, what must you think of him, seeing him panic over the safety harness that you’ve worn hundreds of times before for fun? He nods his head, shaking away the feelings and memories and emotions and all the other thoughts that he wishes he could just wash down the drain …

“Are you sure—?”

“Perfectly,” he spits, but it comes out more snappishly than he intended, and you recoil with a look on your face that makes him despise himself.

I shouldn’t be allowed to speak.

“And enjoy your ride!” the attendant finishes with a flourish, and the thick metal cranking is all the warning you get before the cart begins to lift off from the ground. Loki’s heart jumps to his throat, pounding so fast he can’t make out the separate beats.

“This part is the scariest bit,” you yell at him over the grinding of machinery. “The anticipation kills me!”

Loki inhales. The elevator continues to rise, inching up slowly along the spire, the ground beneath their feet melting into miniature. This is alright, he tells himself. If this is the worst part of the experience, then he’ll be just fine. There’s nothing particularly frightening about it—he spoke the truth when he told you that he had never been bothered by heights. It’s all perfectly fine.

Perfectly. Fine.

Norns, they’re still going up. He risks a glance at the track above him—surely they must be close now? The movement makes him queasy, and he quickly turns back to face straight ahead. His knuckles are white from clutching the handles. The harness is digging into his chest and it takes all of his self-control not to rip it off. The elevator stutters—is this it? His breath catches, but no, they’re still going up. They seem to be slowing down though, don’t they? Or is that only his imagination?

I’m going to be ill.

They’ve stopped. That’s not in his head. Everything seems frozen in place. Why did he agree to do this? Loki presses his eyes closed. Any moment now. Any moment …

Still nothing.

His chest aches. He may have forgotten to breathe. Why have they stopped? Is something wrong? Loki turns to you—you look ecstatic, eyes crinkled with elation, mouth wide in an open grin.

“When is it going to—”

You drop.

The world goes silent. He feels it, that awful sensation in his stomach as the line goes slack and colors rush before his eyes in a blur until it all fades to darkness, airlessness, weightlessness, his lungs burning and drowning on the empty void of space—he’s falling, he’s falling again, he’s falling again oh please Norns not again—

There’s ground beneath his feet. He’s not sure where it came from. His knuckles ache. You’re talking – to him? He’s not sure, he only barely can make out your voice …

“Loki? The harness is coming up. Can you let go?”

He’s still clinging to the handles. Can he let go? He’s not sure. His body feels like lead. He pries his fingers from the metal tube and the pressure against his chest vanishes with a woosh over his head.

“There you go.” Your voice is soft, encouraging, closer than he remembered. He looks up to find you kneeling on the ground before him. You flash a nervous smile. “You alright?”

He’s not sure what to say. His instinct is to apologize, insist that yes, of course, he’s quite alright, he didn’t mean to give any impression to the contrary, everything is fine, but the words catch in his throat.

stars melting together smothering his last breath

Loki lets out a shuddering breath, settles for a nod.

“What’s the hold-up?” Stark calls out. “Barton and Romanov are waiting with the kids on the other side of the park.”

“We’re just taking a break for a minute!” Your reply is hurried. “You guys can go on, we’ll meet you there.”

“Is something wrong?” Thor sounds concerned, and—oh great—now both him and Stark are walking over to their cart. “Loki? What happened?”

“I—” But words, so often his steadfast ally, seem to be failing him right now. What happened? He has no answer; at least, none that his brother would accept. For nothing had happened, not really, and yet that was enough to send him spiraling through the fabric of reality.

He hates this. He hates feeling so weak.

Stark is chuckling. “If I knew that this was all it took to shut him up, I would have rented this place out sooner—”

Enough.

Loki forces himself to stand – far too quickly, his stomach churns at the movement, but he swallows the bile in his throat. He needs to get away. It doesn’t matter how, but he needs to not be with them. Besides him, you scramble to your feet too.

“I’m well.” His voice doesn’t sound right—it feels foreign, and thick like syrup, nothing like his own. “You may go on without me.”

“Are you certain?” Thor is frowning. “We can wait—”

Please don’t.

“I’m certain. I just need to sit for a moment.”

“There’s a bench nearby!” You’ve taken on the same cheery inflection typical of your working voice, and it adds a sense of normalcy to a distinctly abnormal situation. He’s grateful for it. “I can show you where!”

Both Stark and his brother seem reluctant to leave, but you insist that it’s fine. “I’ll call you if anything changes.”

He feels slightly steadier as he follows you to the bench—it’s just a wooden thing on the side of the concrete path, across from what appears to be a diner of some sort. You mumble something about going to get water. It’s a relief when you turn away, so you don’t see how he collapses against the seat.

There’s ground beneath his feet. Loki closes his eyes, focuses on that. There’s ground beneath my feet. The asphalt is firm, hot with the summer sun, anchoring him to reality. He lets out a breath. It feels safe.

Unless, of course, it crumbles beneath your step and flings you back into the abyss –

“Hey.” He jerks up at the sound of your voice, and the suddenness causes you to jump as well. You shift apologetically, standing in front of him. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you.”

Loki swallows. How did he not hear you come up? “You didn’t.” Although it must be obvious that you did. At least you’re kind enough to allow him the lie.

You offer him a plastic cup. It’s a flimsy thing, but quite cold, relieving against his feverish skin. He takes it with a mumbled thanks, pretending he doesn’t notice how you’re studying him with a quiet sort of concern.

“Are you feeling better?” you ask after a moment.

Loki bites down on the inside of his cheek, relishing the way it stings. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“It’s just – I mean – ” you glance down, tugging at your shirt sleeve. “I get panic attacks too.”

“I don’t—” But he stops himself, stops the urge to argue. Gives a gentle nod instead. “I’m well, thank you. I just … I need a moment to catch my breath.”

“I’m sorry …” You look away guiltily. “Death Drop is kind of a lot – we shouldn’t have done that first.”

“It’s not that. I –” He wants to explain to you. He wants you to know that he’s not usually like this—he never used to be like this, he’s strong and steady and perfectly capable of anything you could ask of him, but his voice is failing once again. Loki huffs a sigh. “You ought to go on with the others. I don’t wish to ruin your day.”

“Oh, you haven’t ruined anything. I’ve been on every ride in this park about a million times. It’s fine!” Your voice is bubbly and light as you sit down next to him on the bench. There’s something oddly comforting about the sound. “Besides, it’s bad etiquette to leave a friend by themselves at an amusement park. Buddy system and all that.”

A friend. He can only stare at you.

You falter. “Unless … unless you’d rather I left?”

“No—” Loki surprises himself with how quickly he answers. “No, I’d rather you didn’t.”

Several minutes pass in silence, the frantic beating of his heart slowly tapering off into something softer as he drinks in your presence. He’s grateful for it, grateful for how you let him soak in the quiet. Thor would never have allowed him such a moment’s peace.

 He’s considering asking if you’re sure you don’t want to go on any other coasters (he feels guilty for keeping you here—perhaps he can accompany you through the queue and wait on the ground?) when you suddenly sit up stock-straight. “Oh!”

Loki frowns. “Is something wrong?”

You turn to him with a wide grin. “I just remembered they have Dole Whip here!”

“They—what kind of whip?” What sort of ride would a whip be, he wonders? A human sized slingshot, perhaps? His stomach lurches at the thought.

Luckily though, he’s proved wrong. “Dole Whip!” you giggle. “It’s like ice cream, but fruit flavored. Like there’s pineapple and strawberry and whatnot—it’s like soft serve.” You look at him with a kind of hopeful excitement. “Do you want to try some?”

Loki hums. He has yet to try soft serve ice cream, but he knows his brother practically swears by the stuff. “Is it good?”

“Supposedly. I’ve actually never tried it— we never wanted to spend money on park food when we would come as kids. It’s stupid expensive.” You smirk. “But today’s all on Mr. Stark’s dime, so…”

He chuckles. “And you would take advantage of your employer in such a fashion? I didn’t realize I had such a Machiavellian on my hands.”

“Hey, I’m just taking advantage of the opportunities presented to me!” You stand with a grin, holding your hands up in a mock surrender pose. “You can’t blame me for that, can you?”

“Oh, I’d never,” he teases as he stands, and he’s relieved to find that his legs have regained their steadiness. “I’d be honored to experience this Dole Whip with you on Stark’s expense.”

“Fantastic,” you beam. “It’s not too far from here. And it’s right next to a bunch of these little shops—they have this ridiculous giant sea monster toy that costs like $300, I can show you—”

You continue on as the both of you walk down the path, telling him all about the park’s various hidden gems and the inside jokes you and your friends have concocted around them, and Loki finds himself laughing more than not—he can’t help it, your giggles are just too infectious.

Huh. Perhaps joining you today wasn’t a mistake after all.

[snderist]

i notice nobody ever talks about the struggles of wanting to make sims content and being in college at the same time. i have sm mutuals who are in college/uni just like i am, who have gone inactive bc posting and keeping up with school work whilst having a job can be very stressful. for me, the sims was an outlet; something i could play to escape reality for a while. in the past few months i’ve come to realize that playing the sims was becoming more of a job than a hobby. i started to feel obligated to post. even though i didn’t get many interactions, it wasn’t rlly something i cared about. i enjoyed posting my sims lore/stories, and i love the friends i made while being here; but i started to see more and more people becoming less active and i kinda just lost the motivation to continue posting.

just a reminder that a break is always necessary. do not feel like you are obligated to post all the time, whether you’re a small content creator or a big one. it’s not selfish of you to want to take a breather and work on yourself. as a fan of many sims creators, i would prefer they take as much time as they can to themselves. being away from the screen gives you an opportunity to experience real life events, which then can inspire you to make even better content.

to take breaks is to become a better version of yourself. i’ll be back soon <3

[tmwcs]

T̴̶̨̨̢̛͇̱̙̭̳͚̼͍̪̮͔̯͍͎͔͔̽̿͊ͥͨ͗ͬͧ͑̓̌̓ͫ͋̇̂̈́̀͘͠͞͠ḩ̵̶̧͈̜͇͖̮͚̟͉̝̤̘̹̬̎̍͊͑̋͌͂̏͒̾̇̌ͩ́͂͛͊̾̂ͩ̀͆̓ͮ̚̚͢͢͠ë͍́̾ͭ O̶̼͚͐̌́ͦ́͆͋̌͡t̷̴̴̩͓͍͔̣͖̟͈͕̰̱ͨ́͛̾̎͐̽͐͑͒̏ͮ̃̀͂ͧ̔̾̚͘͘͢͠͝͡͡ͅh̥͉͂ę̜̮̱͕̟̘ͧ̄̃ͣ̋ŗ̢͔̖͎̪͚͇͕̩͖̹͒ͮͬ̎̃̽͆ͫ̏ͩ̀͆̇ͬͣ̃̄̚͟s̸̴̶̨͇̣͈̪͕̯̺̮͇ͦ̏̓ͤ͛ͥ͑̆̋̏ͦ̀̊̃͢_̢̛͍̖̩̞̬ͨj͇͓͚̝͑̇̊̒͐ͥ́̚͞ḍ̵̵̸̡̨̧̢̛͉̣̜̗̦̫̮̪̰͂̌̃̌̽̀̌́͑̏̑̂̊ͯͩ̀̊͌͆ͬ͛ͧ̑ͦ̉̕͟͝͝ẽ̸̸̢̖͕͙̦̄ͭͪ̈̊̈͐̂͝

CHAPTER FIVE

The Otherside Chapter 5 here!!!! If you wish to be added to the Taglist, please let me know. If you’ve already asked and are not on it, please give me a reminder, it’s been a while since I’ve posted the previous chapter.

Warnings: reader gets attacked, attempted r@pe, stalking, mentions of death through torturous acts, rough home life, parental neglect, sibling rivalry, death threats, some cursing, and I think that’s it.

The park looked too enticing to merely walk pass. With the full moon peeling in between the trees, you just had to take a moment to appreciate the beauty of the brightened night sky. A lonesome bench offers the perfect view of the scenery and so, you rest your gift bag to the side as you perch yourself and sit nearly over the curved edge and admire the glorious pearl in the sky.

Not long after you sat down, your mind drifts away as you are reminded of the harsh reality of coming home to an ignorant mother and shameful father. As a daughter, you loved them and hoped they would become better, but as fate would have it, they would continue to let you down as you witnessed the constant habit of them choosing to be better parents for your elder brother. Some days, you really try to see it from their perspective, yet at the end of the day, the chapters in your story end the same. Your brother got away with everything….everything. He abused the trust and goodliest trait of all around him. There were countless times when you came to witness his terrible deeds or capture sustained evidence of his unlawful ways; whether it be theft, fibbing, or drug use, yet due to the persona he portrayed in front of open eyes, no one would ever believe you whenever you presented the proof. Nobody could ever believe that the local church boy preparing for college would ever do such terrible deeds. So much for knowing “thy neighbor”. The worst was when your mother responded so carelessly as you displayed the video evidence of him stealing money from your wallet, no doubt to pay for his drug habits. Despite the act being caught in plain sight, her unusual response of “I will talk to him, and the Lord will take care of the rest.” Was the most disappointing thing you ever did hear. Then of course there was your father who claimed that his son would never do such a thing, and even dared to accuse you of conspiring against his only son. That’s right, “his only son”, the ultimate statement that gave constant reminder that in your dads eyes, his son wasn’t your brother, how could he be if you were never accepted as a daughter?

Maybe the troubling home life is a blessing. After all, it was all that motivates you to earn decent grades, and apply to numerous universities; you should be hearing back from one of them any day now, and once you do, you’ll take your packed bags and hike your way into adulthood. You’ll get a part time job to pay for your living expenses and continue to study hard and get through this life, while never looking back. Since you had come to accept that the family you were born with could never find love in their hearts for you, you reserved all of your heart for yourself. Perhaps someday you’ll find someone who is worthy of it.

Lost in your thoughts, you remained distracted under the stressful circumstances of your family life, so much that you failed to hear the unknown man sneaking up behind. Your view of the moon is suddenly enclosed by complete darkness as you feel a pair of strong hands covering them and blocking your screams. You kick and attempt to peel his fingers off as he lifts you from the bench and rams you into the grassy ground. The person was not gentle, you felt your knees, shoulders, elbows, and back being scrape as you roughed you up and straddled atop your frame. You struggled as you found it hard to breathe with his hands blocking your airways. Finally he exposes his voice as he leans in and through a clenched jaw, he grits out his warning. “Stop moving or I’ll fucking slit your throat.” With a cold metal edge of what you suspected to be a knife, he presses it against your delicate skin, just underneath your jaw.

You refrained from making any sudden movements, only admitting a gentle nod as you complied with his order. “Good. Now stay still.” He demands as he begins to unbutton your blouse. You panicked internally but calmed yourself as you wait for the perfect moment to make a striking move that would allow you to get away. Said opportunity presents itself as you felt him ease his grip over your mouth just as he was placing his disgusting mouth over your exposed chest. With a swift knee to his shaft, you rammed the bone edge of your joint as hard as you could, rendering him to toss over and groan in agonizing pain.

Quickly, you turn over and lift yourself from the ground as you stumble for balance. Lightheaded and dizzy, the limited air flow had caused you to nearly pass out. Had you not made your move in time, you surely would have passed out. As you level your feet, you lean forward and prepared for take off as your body develops a swift running stance, when you felt the man’s hands grab on to your ankle. With a harsh pull towards his chest, your body’s momentum fails you as your chest falls to the ground, knocking the breath out of your chest. He roughly turns you over and once again, straddles your waist line as he pinches his knees to close you in. You watched as he raised the knife above head, ready to strike down and deliver a finishing blow. Your breathing escalates as your eyes frown fearfully. With his words, you scream out as you’re about to meet your demise. “Stupid little bitch!”

You wince your eyes shut and turn to face away. The sudden burst of stingy tears squeezed out from the corners of your eyes drip along the contour of your cheek, providing the only warmth you could possibly feel at that moment.

The sounds of choked up gasps caused you to slowly open your eyes and face forward. You could feel your brows raise in confusion, but migrate to sudden shock as you witness a clear view of the man’s throat. It was all you could see and yet you were able to ascertain that something was pulling the man’s head back, far back.

“W-w-wha-at….the fffuck!” The man was barely able to spew out as he struggled to speak and breathe. Inch by inch, you saw his head being peeled back. Whoever it was that had a hold on him definitely had the intention of snapping his neck in half.

With the man struggling for release, you felt his hand gripped around your neck tightening. You wiggle around, attempting to remove his hand while the other still grips the blade above your face. Suddenly, a deep voice comes from behind your would be killer. It was calm and flared a peculiar accent. “Let go of her neck, otherwise I’ll break yours.”

Another man? And he came to save you? How lucky for you! Though it was too soon to act joyful as you felt the grip around your throat pinching tightly. You felt your throat closing inward as you found yourself unable to breathe. Pounding against the man’s chest, your eyes develop tunnel vision when finally, the weight of his body is drastically lifted from you. Laying in a dazed and confused state, your narrowed vision allows you to look at your savior. He wore a mask, with a jean jacket under a black vest. A black cap covered most of his hair, with only the wispy ends peeking from underneath. He throws the man off to the side. The heaving rise and fall of his chest tells you of his immaculate strength as he resorted to using his upper body weight to lift the other man and toss him over as if he was nothing. For one second, his face turns down over to you, where your eyes meet briefly.

“Stay here. I’ll be right back.” Is all he tells you before he takes his step and disappears from your view. You barely had any strength to move as your body recovers from the fatigue from the loss of oxygen. Your hearing on the other hand seemed to work fine as you listened in on the muffled screams of your attacker. It all faded as you finally succumbed and drift off to a state of unconsciousness.

You awoke in a darkened room, enclosed by silk and warmth, a total contrast from the environment you were in earlier. Despite not being able to see, you were able to ascertain that you were on a pillow top bed in what appeared to be a sky rise apartment, as deduced by the massive window view of the bustling streets and flashy media billboards on the neighboring towers. Whoever it was that saved and brought you back certainly was a person with great affluence. The comfort of the room enticed you to remain however, you knew you had to get up and grasp some answers.

Getting up, you realize that your phone was missing. More than likely it fell out of your pocket at the park during the struggle. Maybe your rescuer will take you back and help you find it.

You open the door and admire the main living room. Just like the bedroom, it has an impressive row of large windows that view the entire city.

“Wow…” you breathed out as you witnessed the apartment being lit up by the outside lights. What a fabulous place to live in.

Tip toeing into the main area, you looked around trying to find your shoes, but no luck. You peeked into all the bathrooms, guest bedrooms, and even inside the kitchen cabinets but to no avail were you able to find them. Strange.

The night view of the city captured your attention as you pondered the whereabouts of your shoes. The beauty of the starry sky hovering over bright city lights seized your attention for much longer than what you had anticipated. You lightly jump as you hear quiet footsteps from behind.

Snapping around, your eyes meet him once again. “It’s you…” you quietly murmured as he stepped into the light.

“Yeah…it’s me.” He responds back while licking his lip.

“You’re the one that…well, you saved me from that man earlier.”

He chuckles at your prospective point as his hands remain tucked into his jean pockets, causing for her his shoulders to shrug slightly. “Heh…yeah.”

His voice was so deep and alluring.

“Well…thank you.” You lightly chuckled. Without his mask you were able to see just how handsome he was. He appeared to be Asian, perhaps Japanese? Chinese? Or maybe Korean. Either way, he was perfectly sculpted and well built. “What was your name?” You ask shyly as you took notice of his intense eye contact.

“Jake. Aaaand you?” The way he drew out his tone and playfully pushed out his request caused you to melt. You’ve never seen anyone with such intense sex appeal. “It’s…y/n.”

“Huh…I dig the name.” His tongue rolls offensively in his mouth as his lips part open, allowing you to view the act.

“Could I ask you a question?” You propel shyly once again. “Sure.”

You take up on his answer and politely asked him about a stumbling thought that suddenly hit you. “Can I ask how you knew I was in trouble? The park was large and it was so empty. Did you know that man that attacked me?”

Your question was out of pure curiosity, not at all suspicious. It’s not uncommon for a person to walk alone at the park, even at night. But you had a gut feeling that it wasn’t just pure luck that your savior happened to be at the exact location at the right time. You smiled lightly as you felt yourself being quite smitten with the man before you.

“I didn’t know him…but I knew of his intentions.” He calmly breathes out. You nod lightly as you chuckled. “Oh so you must be a detective or something.” You playfully pushed out, yet the sincerity was genuine as you really had thought that the man was investigating the attacker. It wasn’t until he shook his head, your brows furrowed in slight confusion. “Oh…well how did you know then?” You asked, formulating a slight smile as you yearned to hear out the explanation.

“The look in his eye.”

You shift your gaze from left to right before making it back to center. You were so confused by his vague statement, you urged him to elaborate. “The look?”

“Yeah, the look.”

He remained evasive to give closure, which caused you to feel a little uneasy as you noticed his steps forward. “That same one that I get…from time to time.”

You piece the code of his wordings all too quickly, yet you felt frozen as he closes the distance. With a terrible feeling in your gut, you listen as he continues to enlighten you with his shuttering voice.

“As many times as I get that feeling…that look in my eye…it always came with the intention of taking something valuable away. I violate and plunge to destroy their minds endlessly…but with you-“

He pauses as he reaches up and softly punches your hair, rubbing them together. “This is the first time I’ve wanted to give…and build something beautiful.”

His hazy look showed you that the man seemed to be in lust or smitten. But it was also dangerous, and the meaning of his words told you of his intentions. You backed away, trying to figure out your next move as you find it impossible to believe that you went from one attacker to seemingly another. “D-don’t…wait…just-“ you stutter out as Jake predicted your movements. With force and strength, he grips your arms and levitates your entire weight in mid air as he lays you down on the couch. His movements were much more gentle than the previous attackers. He even went so far as to gently trail his fingertips along your scrapes, which he had cleaned while you were unconscious.

“Poor babygirl…he hurt you, huh?”

You wiggled and tried to break free as he hovered above. Leaning into your ear, he whispers a deadly conclusion of the other man’s end. “He‘s never going to hurt you again, Princess.”

Your movements come to a pause as you look at him confused and shocked. Watching as Jake bit down on his lip, he smiles deviously as he proceeds to fill you in.

“I made him promise not to.”

You breathed cautiously as you eagerly asked. “…what…did you do?”

Unexpectedly, his words told you of a different ending than what the previous has led you to believe.

“I killed him anyway. You can’t trust a man like that, believe me.”

Burrowing his head into your neck, you felt the sweet kisses of his lips as you screamed out, trying to break free from the developing grasp he formed around your wrists. He continued on as you squirmed from under him. “I tore his mouth apart, and pissed in it. I did it for what he was trying to do to you…babygirl…”

You panic as you kick into open air, he was so much more strategic with his hold and movements that he left no part of him vulnerable to your creativity. “No one is ever going to hurt you. You’re safe. You’ll always be safe. I’m going to keep you. I’ll make you happy….as long as you make me happy.”

You felt his tongue trailing over your collarbone as his large hand took hold on both of yours. Pinning them over your head, he unbuttons your blouse and unzips your jeans. “Stop!” You cry out.

“You belong to me. I'm never going to let anyone touch you like that…the way you have me feeling right now…you wicked girl.”

Raising his head, he pinches your chin with his two fingers as he levels your vision with his. A dangerous smirk on his face tells you of a heated passion, lust, desire and even love…but not the type that you read in romance stories or saw in movies. No. This was a type of sentiment that was full of conflict, chaos, and poison…coming from him, it was going to be deadly.

With a few strokes of his thumb, he softly tells you…

“Just relax baby…I’m not going to treat you like the others. You deserve better…you deserve the world, and I’m about to give it to you.”

Taglist: @nshmrarki , @lprww , @baekxo07 , @m7omo@nikstrange@heeshees@moonmoongi@heesitation@heeseung-min @nctsslut @heeseung-min @addictedtohobi

[sleepiestarchivist]

Tips from a DID system getting a fucking master’s degree:

Every conceivable surface is a place for notes. Every room in our apartment has a sticky note pad. We also have a white board by the door and a black board in the kitchen. The more urgent the information, the larger we write it- absolutely vital information, like super time sensitive tasks, go in REALLY BIG HANDWRITING on the black board, because then no one can miss it.

Ask for help. Professors are much kinder people than any damn medical professional I’ve encountered. My professors are super sympathetic and accommodating, they understand I have more difficulties than most students. Even without approaching the office of accessibility (which we absolutely should have), we’ve been given so many accommodations and so much help. We wouldn’t have survived this long if we didn’t finally break and tell our professors what was going on in our lives- and they all stopped at nothing until they were certain I was getting the help I needed.

Find whatever way of writing notes works best for you. Experiment. Make it fun. We make our best notes when writing in comic sans and using goofy, informal language. Document everything you can, even if you think a certain detail in a lesson is unimportant, because you never know what will be retained/what alters will communicate to one another. So getting used to writing thorough notes that you know how to navigate and feel motivated to write will be a life saver.

Stim toys, fidget toys, comfort items, etc are all your friends. As long as they aren’t loud, I promise, no one cares. I regularly bring plushies to work and usually get compliments. Just don’t be disruptive and you’re fine, honestly sometimes people get jealous and comment how they wish they had the guts to bring toys/tools like that with them.

EVERYTHING HAS A HOME. Assign everything a spot. Pencils go in the pencil pouch which goes in the front pocket of the book bag. The laptop and charger go into the laptop pocket the moment I’m done using them, even if I’m at home. It’s hard as hell but write down where everything is supposed to go so everyone knows where to put things when they’re done, create a standardized organization system. It at least minimizes the risk of things being misplaced or lost.

That’s it for now, I’m sure we’ll remember more tricks and tools that have helped us survive, but yeah. I promise, if you’re a system in high school or college, you can make it. Also remember: academic success does not determine your personal worth!!!

[prismaticpichu]

Heya, friendos 💖

To a certain and safe extent, I like to be transparent with things around here, and I do think this is one of those times where it’s appropriate. With that said, life has been… fucking messy lately. Disastrous mental health has currently stopped me from attending school, and I don’t know how long this stretch of severe ickiness is going to last; it could be a few more days, weeks, months… who fucking knows lol. It’s honestly one of the worst headspaces I’ve been in my entire life, and I’m not even sure what to do with that life at the moment.

Anyways, like I said, I just like being open and honest with y’all ❤️ There are times where the ickiness can bleed into the tone of my posts/mood, and I just want there to be some justification for it ig xD

That also said, if there are any fanfic prompts you’d like me to tackle, plz do feel free to send ‘em over ❤️ Even if I can’t attend school at the moment, even if I tentatively may not be able to go to college, I don’t want to give up my dream of being an author—or even just a decent writer, period. Now… is fanfic going to fix all my problems? Absolutely not, and it never will. But if there’s one thing that genuinely keeps me going, it’s my drive to entertain and spread even the faintest sparks of joy. If I can’t necessarily muster the strength to smile, then I want to try to make others find that strength. Already shelved a few multichaps I completely (for now) lost motivation in, so mental plate’s pretty clean in terms of starting new things. Can’t promise they’ll be done immediately (sometimes my energy is zip x,D), but it’s something to keep the brain busy and distracted. And as always, ofc, there is no pressure whatsoever to send anything in ❤️

Take care out there, friendos <333 We’ve got this!!

[genreweird]

there’s a picture i can’t get out of my head, of the road outside my partner’s house. it wasn’t her family that took it, we found it on social media in a compilation of images of the destruction. the trees & greenery are gone. the road itself is broken, crumbling, unusable. the creek is swollen & muddy. i’ve driven that route countless times, loved it, & now it’s just gone. how are we supposed to go home? i couldn’t reach my family for three days. i have friends who are also away at college, forced to watch our hometowns drown from a distance, who still haven’t heard from their loved ones. i know it’s better for us to be out of danger, to share resources with those who are trapped rather than to need them ourselves. it still feels like exile. every road into my county was damaged too badly for anyone to leave or enter.

& all i can do is share resources & look at the pictures—that stretch of new river under which lies the park where my partner & i read in the sunlight & counted sixty different dogs this summer, my childhood church sunken up to its stained glass windows, the homes destroyed. I learned this morning that my own house is damaged, but i likely won’t see it for weeks. everyone i know from appalachia is reeling with the same pain, if they aren’t in their homes or displaced in their towns, facing the disaster themselves.

this crisis is not normal. this has never happened to appalachia before—hurricanes don’t reach this far, the mountains protect us, but not this time. nobody was prepared. i’m lucky because my hometown is a tourist destination, so we have national attention, but what about the rural towns? the ones who can’t even ask for help because they won’t have cell service for weeks & all their roads are annihilated? we’ve all been hurt so badly.

& it makes me think of the other people around the world who have lost their homes because of the climate crisis. those in the global south who don’t have access to even the limited resources appalachia does. those in palestine & lebanon whose homes have been annihilated. their pain is undoubtedly worse, but the underlying motivations of what’s harming us are the same—corporate greed, imperialistic fervor. capitalism-driven climate change will hurt all of us, & here is the proof. look: there’s nowhere in the world to hide.

keep appalachia in your thoughts. don’t look away, please. i’ll reblog this with a list of places to donate & resources for people in appalachia. & in the meantime, take care of your communities. that’s the most constructive thing any of us can do.