#i’ve got the energy to edit at least lmao

[springsylph]

obligatory “not dead, just depressed and freakishly busy” update after a month of radio silence oops

[juniperskye]

I’ve got you!

Based on the following ask: I want fluffy romance

It’s an Aaron Hotchner x reader (lmao daddy issues on fleek) anyways

I’d like to see like romantic tension building between them like it begins small but slowly gets bigger and it isn’t until reader gets into trouble (like say almost drowning because she never learned how to swim like my dumbass) that Aaron almost loses it a little and saved reader which makes him end up confessing to each other and they get together and it’s just fluffy romance because as much as I love the smutty stuff, I crave fluff so badly for my poor heart and for Aaron because baby deserves comfort too. Anyways Love you gorgeous

Aaron Hotchner x BAU! Fem Reader

Angst/Fluff

Word count: 2533

REQUESTS ARE OPEN - not edited - please be kind. Requests are open and feedback is welcome if it's constructive!

Warnings: My blog is 18+, minors DNI, SLOW BURN, Age gap (non-specified), some explicit language, reader can’t swim, no use of y/n, Fem reader, reader has no physical description, canon typical violence, reader almost drowns, mention of Jack, Beth never existed in this okay!, mention of hospitals, team calls reader flower as a nickname! let me know if I missed any!

I do not consent to having my work translated or reposted to any other site. That being said I do not own the characters portrayed in this story.

Your first impression of Aaron Hotchner was at a lecture at your university. Jason Gideon had been leading the BAU and Hotch had just been an agent at the time, but you had been captivated by his intelligence and the way he carried himself. He was so confident and had this strength about him that drew you in. Not in a romantic way though!

At least that’s what you told yourself.

--

Aaron’s first impression of you was when you had been hired onto the team through Director Cruz. Mateo had brought you along with your file and handed you off to Aaron, informing him that you’d be joining the BAU effective immediately.

Initially Aaron was annoyed, this kind of thing hadn’t always worked out in his favor, having agents assigned to his team without his approval but, looking at you and your impressive file, he knew he had to give you a shot.

Glancing over to you he took note of your beauty. It wasn’t the obvious fake filter-like beauty, but something more natural. You had this air of warmth that radiated off of you, it was the type of energy that just made you feel comfortable around someone. He couldn’t help but think that if he’d met you some other way, that maybe he’d have asked you out.

--

Things between you and Aaron had progressed organically. The two of you had grown pretty close, being one another’s confidant within the team. You weren’t together, but the amount of time you two spent together suggested otherwise.

It all happened pretty quickly.

--

“Does Hotch always stay late?” You asked.

“Uh, yeah pretty much.” Emily laughed.

“What about Jack? He doesn’t go home to be with him? I mean…I, that came out wrong. I didn’t mean that to sound judgy, I just meant like doesn’t he want to go home?” You stuttered.

“I’m sure he wants to go home to Jack. His sister-in-law watches Jack when he can’t, but since Strauss died, they gave Hotch a lot of additional responsibilities for this team. Things that Cruz never took back on, so he has nearly double the workload now that he did back then.” Derek explained.

You stood there stunned to silence as the others packed their bags to head home for the evening. You hadn’t even noticed them making their way to the elevator.

“Aren’t you coming?” JJ questioned.

“You know, I just remembered I forgot to get the file for that case we had in Minnesota back to Hotch. He’ll be pissed if I don’t turn it in before our days off.” You lied.

“Do you want us to wait?” Spencer asked.

“No, you guys go ahead! Enjoy your weekend!”

You sat back down at your desk, attempting to make yourself look busy while the other piled into the elevator. Once the doors had closed you made your way up to his office…unable to hear the others…

“She’s got it bad.” Derek teased.

“So does he.” Rossi confirmed.

You gently knocked on his office door and waited for him to permit your entry. Once he did, you pushed the door open slightly and peaked in, waiting for him to acknowledge your presence.

“Oh hey, what are you still doing here? I figured you’d have left with the others.” Aaron let a slight smile slip past his lips.

“I was going to, but you’re still here. It didn’t feel right going home for the weekend while you are still here working your ass off.”

“I’m the boss, I’m always here working my ass off. Head home, enjoy the time off. Seriously.” Aaron suggested.

“How about instead, I do whatever I can to help you get through your work a little faster and I order dinner for us. Would you prefer tacos or Thai food?” You pulled up your maps app to see restaurants that were nearby.

“You should-”

“Don’t even try to argue with me Hotch.” You threatened.

“Tacos.”

“Perfect.”

--

That night you helped Aaron double-check the case reports and cross reference them to make sure they were all filed properly. It allowed him some extra time to complete some administrative work and when your food arrived, the two of you sat and laughed while enjoying your tacos.

--

Garcia, Emily, and JJ were all clutching their temples while chugging down coffee in hopes to alleviate their hangovers.

Spencer and Derek couldn’t help but chuckle at the girls and the fact that they chose to drink far too much last night, knowing full well they’d need to be up early to cheer on their fearless leader as he completed the annual FBI triathlon.

Dave waved to the others notifying them that he could see Aaron coming around the last corner.

“Wait where’s flower at?” Derek asked.

The team looked around to see if they could spot you, knowing that you would never miss this, given how close you and Aaron had become. Dave chuckled to himself and pointed over to where you were standing with Jack on your shoulders as he held up a large glittering sign.

Everyone cheered as Aaron crossed the finish line only, he didn’t stop to greet the team. He made his was straight to you and Jack, he assisted him in getting down off your shoulders and complimented the beautiful poster he had made.

“I had some help!” Jack replied, gently grabbing your hand.

You’d smile and wish Aaron a job well done.

The team would just watch from afar and wonder how the two of you could be so incredibly oblivious to the love you so obviously shared for one another.

--

“Wooo go Jack!” You cheered.

Aaron couldn’t help but chuckle at you, genuinely loving the bond you’d established with his son. It had started when Jack needed to spend a day at the BAU and you’d gone out of your way to get him snacks and print a few coloring pages for him. It had shifted to something deeper than that not long after. Jack would ask if you could come to the park with them or if you could help him with the poster for his dad or, like today for instance, if you could come to his soccer game.

You had packed up a cooler bag full of drinks and snacks for the three of you. Dressed in a simple T-shirt and jeans, Aaron had never thought you looked better. You’d been so casual and comfortable, and when you hopped in the passenger seat of his car that morning something stirred in Aaron. A feeling he wasn’t sure he was ready to feel again, let alone give in to.

“Did you see that? I made a goal!” Jack hollered running over to your waiting embrace.

“I did buddy, you were incredible out there!” You praised.

“Dad, can we all go get lunch now? And maybe then we can go see the new spiderman movie?” Jack pleaded.

“Oh – bud I don’t, I uh. I’m not sure that’s a good –” Aaron fumbled.

“I would love to, as long as it’s not an imposition.” You smiled.

“It’s not! An imposition, I mean.” Aaron clarified.

“Well then! What do you want for lunch Jack?” You asked.

You’d spent the rest of the day with the Hotchner boys, going to lunch and then seeing a movie. Which led to you offering to make them dinner, and building Legos with Jack, and then a nightcap with Aaron. He’d offered you his guestroom and then to drive you home first thing and given that you were both tipsy…you were quick to agree.

What you hadn’t expected was breakfast. He and Jack had gone all out with chocolate chip pancakes…things were feeling a little too domestic. When had things gotten so comfortable?

--

As the feeling stirred in both you and Aaron, you had begun to notice all the little things you did for one another. Things that had just become natural for you both in the time you’d known each other, second nature at this point.

You always slid sticky notes in your case files before turning them in to him. Sometimes they’d contain a doodle of something silly or a quote you’d read somewhere that made you think of him. What you didn’t know is he saved them all. They were tucked away in the back of his desk drawer, a neat pile of multicolored paper, serving as a reminder of how happy you made him.

Aaron shared similar antics…only his served in the form of your favorite tea, left on your desk each morning before the others arrived so they wouldn’t know it was him placing it there. Though they all had their suspicions anyway. Every once in while…usually after tough cases, or if he knew you hadn’t eaten dinner – which he’d know because you’d fall asleep mid-conversation via text – he’d leave a chocolate croissant…your favorite.

--

Aaron had almost let his feelings slip once. Dave had caught the internal battle that Aaron was facing, he wore it as a pained expression and tense shoulders. Dave had reassured him that you were alright and there was no need to worry, only that didn’t help much. You had gotten hurt, and that only proved that it could happen again. This was a dangerous job full of pain and suffering. Aaron realized he couldn’t bear the thought of you getting hurt.

You had been away on a case; the team had found the unsub and were closing in on him. You had rounded a corner in your chase and came face to face with the man you were after, and he had gotten the upper hand. He’d gotten a few good punches in and knocked you on your ass. Aaron had been quick to return the favor once he caught up.

That is when this need to protect you had grown all consuming. Aaron decided then to offer to train with you, in the hope of improving your self-defense skills a little more. And that is where you found yourself on Thursday evenings. Aaron and you would go to the FBI gym and train for about an hour before going to dinner.

This tradition sort of kept going…it sort of progressed from self-defense training to just working out together. An excuse really, an easy way of spending more time together without it looking too suspicious.

--

Dave had pushed Aaron time and time again, practically begging him to ask you out once and for all. To which Aaron always had the same reply; “She doesn’t feel that way about me and even if she did, it wouldn’t be appropriate”.

“You must be blind if you don’t see how much she cares about you. Or perhaps I was wrong about you being such a skilled profiler.” Dave chided.

“Excuse me?” Aaron was stunned.

“She is in love with you Aaron. You’d have to be an idiot to not realize, and even worse to keep yourselves from the happiness you both deserve.” Dave scolded.

Aaron sat with that for some time…wondering if Dave was right. Maybe enough was enough.

--

This case started out fine…but would quickly become both yours and Aaron’s worst nightmare.

This particular unsub had been murdering people with seemingly no connection. Disposing of their bodies at the South Coast Shipyard in Newport Beach, California.

The team had been working for days, trying to catch this guy. He was meticulous and stuck to his MO, not straying from his routine even the slightest. Spencer had suggested that he might have OCD.

That is what led you guys to the shipyard to try and corner him. Catch him in the act. You’d been on edge about being so close to the water…truthfully you’d always been afraid of it. And one night in a drunken stupor, you’d let it slip to Aaron that you’d never learned how to swim.

So, when Derek shouted out that you were FBI and Mathias Edwards took off running, you’d been a little nervous to chase after him. You’d do your job as expected…but there was a sick feeling in your stomach as you sprinted on the creaky dock.

It was just you Derek and Aaron at the docks, you had been checking things out, knowing that he’d likely be scoping out the area to see what boats were docked so he could find his next dumpsite. You hadn’t expected him to be there so early.

The three of you had split up, chasing after Mathias. You, thanks to all the training with Aaron, were quick on your feet, catching up with him quickly. You were running down a long straight on the docks, carefully avoiding any rope or ties holding boats in place when Mathias jumped out from between two boats, shoving you full force backward into the water. You’d immediately screamed, flailing your arms in a desperate attempt to stay above the surface.

Derek had been coming from the other direction and was able to tackle Mathias and was working to get him in cuffs. It wasn’t until Aaron came around that Derek even knew something was wrong.

“Where is she?” Aaron shouted. “Flower, where is she?”

Derek stood up, pulling Mathias to his feet and shoving him in the direction of the SUV. “Mathias pushed her into the water, I figured she’d swim around to the ladder at the end of the dock.”

“She can’t swim!” Aaron panicked, wasting no time jumping in the water to find you.

Moving swiftly, Derek secured the unsub in the SUV before running back to help Aaron get you out of the water. He’d found you quickly dragging you by your arm to the surface and lifting you into Derek’s waiting hands.

He’d checked for your pulse and when he couldn’t feel it, he began chest compressions. Aaron heaved himself out of the water and back on to the dock and pressed his ear to your chest to listen for any kind of breath sounds.

“Go call for a bus!” Aaron commanded.

Aaron took over CPR and leaned down to listen for your heartbeat once more. When he again heard nothing, he attempted mouth-to-mouth. He continued on like this for a few more seconds before you lurched forward, sputtering up the water that had entered your airways. Aaron helped you sit up and pulled you into his embrace.

“Oh, thank God.” Aaron muttered. “I’ve got you sweetheart.”

--

You were taken by ambulance to the nearest hospital. They wanted to check your vitals and run a few tests to make sure you were alright. Aaron had insisted on riding along with you and held your hand the entire way. He was by your side the whole time.

“You can’t do that to me.” He whispered.

“What?” You rasped.

“You can’t scare me like that sweetheart. I don’t know what I’d do if we lost you.” His eyes brimmed with tears.

“The team would be okay.”

“Not them. Me and Jack. We can’t lose you baby. We need you; Jack loves you, hell, I love you too much, I don’t think my heart could take it.” You were both crying now.

“I love you too.”

[99hook]

Chaotic Collaborations

Synopsis: The whirlwind of two polar opposites, a story line and unmistakable tensions in between

Warnings: pining, cursing, injury, depictions of blood, protective!hook, jealous!hook, angst, fluff eventually

A/N: welllll after who knows how long I’ve finally managed to conjure up the sunshine!reader x coldhearted hook fic! This was actually so fun to write I got carried away and it takes a drastic turn lmao I hope you love it babesss, enjoy!

(Takes place during the Hook and Jack rivalry)

(Also this shit is extremely long and I’m finishing it at 2am so bare with me if there’s grammatical errors, I’m sleepy lmao)

You were originally ecstatic over the shot at your very first story line when Tony pitched the idea to you. You’d been in AEW for a little over a year and had been hoping that you’d get a little more substantial tv time outside of your typical matches sometime soon, so when Tony called you to his office with an idea that was brought up to him, you couldn’t agree quick enough.

That was until the person you’d be doing the storyline with walked through the door.

The coldhearted handsome devil, as he frequently gets called. Someone you were somewhat familiar with due to seeing his matches in the viewing room from time to time, or him sitting alone in catering every so often, typically with a hatred look towards the whole world on his face.

A man you never considered approaching for the simple fact that he gave the impression that he was not to be fucked with, or even smiled at, for that matter. He was the last person you’d expected Tony to bring in.

“Hook, glad you’re here again. I know we’ve already been over this but now that we have your future partner here, I wanted to give you both the rundown. Have a seat.” Tony points to the chair next to you. He steps in, a hoodie over his head shadowing his eyes that glance at you before he silently takes a seat.

He brought a sudden energy to the room with his presence, one that made you feel a tad bit uneasy. Intimidated, more so.

“Y/N, Hook is who I’m pairing you with for this storyline. It’s come to my attention that the two of you are both crowd favorites and apparently a lot of fans want to see you two together. It would be great for the ratings and for both of your character developments.”

You nodded along, wanting to look over at the man next to you to see what he thought of this, though you kept your eyes on Tony. You knew that fans liked to talk about how you and some of the talent should pair up together, and there were a lot of edits on instagram of you and certain wrestlers that they shipped, but Hook was the least of your expectations.

“I’ll be putting you both in a group chat where I’ll send you segment and promo schedules and concepts, so keep your eyes out for that. Next week, during your match with Anna, Jack Perry is going to come out with the FTW title and hand it to her, and that’s when Hook will be coming out after him. The fans will think it’s all part of their feud until he comes to your aid when Anna hits you with the title while Jack and Hook are fighting on the ramp. That’s going to be the start of the entire storyline leading up to a tagteam match between the four of you.”

You listened intently, not wanting to miss a beat of the instruction. The storyline made a lot of sense since you and Anna did have some on screen animosity to begin with, and hook and jack have been at each others throats for some time now, so you could see the relevance to having Hook as your alliance.

“I’ll be sending you both a text soon on more details.” Tony said before he excused you both from his office. Hook silently got out of his chair and headed through the door without sparing you a glance. You weren’t sure if that meant that he was displeased about the storyline or if he just collected the information and went on his way.

You decided to try to talk to him when you both got into the hallway, but quickly wished you would’ve let him keep walking.

“Hey!” You jog up to him, reaching his side. He glanced over at you for a split second before he fixated his sights ahead. He didn’t greet you back, and that alone made you feel a little uneasy, but you still attempted to make conversation.

“I know we’ve never talked before, but since we’re about to do this whole storyline together, I guess I should introduce myself and all.” You managed a nervous chuckle, but he kept a straight face.

“I’m Y/N.” You continued on, feeling your nerves start to get the better of you, which is when you start rambling, usually.

“I mean, obviously you know that now since Tony said it, but, anyway, i just wanted to break the ice a little. This is all pretty new to me. I’ve never done a story line before so-“

That’s when Hook stops in his tracks, turning to face you. His stare was cold and jaw set. He showed no emotion, nothing at all, really. The way he looked straight into your eyes made you immediately shy away from that gaze. Your eyes dropped to the gold cross sitting over his chest similar to the one you had tucked underneath your shirt that you wore as a good luck charm.

You wanted to pull it out and show him that you had one too but something told you he wouldn’t care about that at all.

You glanced back up into his eyes, the ones that were strongly fixated on you, managing to push past the nervousness he made you feel until you heard him say, “Let’s save the talking for the scripts.”

He held his eyes on you for a second longer before he turned on his heel and headed down the hallway. You didn’t bother to follow. It was clear that Hook didn’t care to make conversation with you, and he wanted to make sure you understood that.

———

You were sitting in catering with Skye and Willow, oblivious to their conversation due to the thoughts that kept swirling around in your brain. It had been a week since that very first interaction with Hook and tonight you were going to be starting the whole storyline.

Skye noticed how you barely paid attention to the conversation and decided to ask you what was going on. You had yet to tell them about the storyline since talking to Hook, or attempting to, didn’t go over so well.

“What’s going on with you?” Skye’s voice reached you, snapping you out of your thoughts.

You could’ve said it was nothing to save yourself the conversation but they were going to know about the whole storyline tonight, so you decided to spill it all.

“Tony’s giving me my first storyline.” You say, watching as a smile spreads across both of their faces before the confusion sets in.

“You don’t seem too excited?” Willow commented.

“I mean, I am, but… Well, okay, so you know how Hook and Jack Perry have that whole rivalry going on right now?”

The girls nod slowly, clearly they were still a bit confused.

“And me and Anna have a match tonight, so Jack’s going to come out and hand her the FTW title so she can knock my ass out with it,-“

“So then Hook is going to come out to save you.” Skye figured. “So is it like, an on screen dating kind of thing?”

“I don’t think so. Tony said we’ll end up teaming up against them, so I’m pretty sure it’s just alliances.”

Willow’s lips spread into a smirk before she looked down.

“Are you nervous about it or something? You’re the one who said you wished you’d get your shot at a story line and now you’re talking like you don’t want to do it.” Skye said, but you hardly heard her when the man who’s been racing through your mind came walking through the catering doors.

Willow noticed your eyes immediately finding him, following him as he headed around the perimeter of the room to take his seat in the very back.

“I think she’s nervous.” Willow grinned, clearly with insinuation but that’s when you quickly tore your eyes away from the man in question and back to them.

“No, it’s the fact that I tried to talk to him after we left Tony’s office, y’know, introduce myself and break the ice since we’re going to be working together, and he literally looked me dead in my face and told me to save the talking for the scripts.”

Both of their jaw’s dropped and Willow’s eyes cut over to the man, shooting him a look he didn’t see since he was on his phone.

“That’s fucking rude.” She said.

“Yeah, and we haven’t spoke since.”

“I mean, he kind of does look like that type of guy. He’s always by himself, always looks like someone pissed in his cheerios, maybe he’s just a dick. I’d just stick to the storyline and don’t bother with him outside of that if he’s going to have that kind of an attitude.” Skye says before she grabs her phone and stands up from the table.

“Anyway, I gotta go. I’ll be watching your match from the viewing room tonight though. You’re gonna do amazing.” She smiles before she heads out, leaving you and willow at the table.

“I agree with Skye. Just try to enjoy your first storyline despite his negative attitude.”

You nodded, then your eyes adverted over to the back of the room, for some reason you felt strongly compelled to steal a glance of him, only to find his eyes locked on you.

You felt your stomach twist suddenly and looked away immediately, but you could still feel the powerful gaze he possessed burning a hole through you, and you weren’t sure if that meant you should look back again, maybe try to go talk to him, or leave the room all together.

“Oh my God, he’s staring at me. Don’t you fucking look, Willow. Don’t make it obvious.”

Willow didn’t, but it was clear she wanted to. You could practically feel his dark eyes on you from way across the room, and you couldn’t help the way it made the pace of your heart quicken, out of the sheer nervousness that his presence hasn’t failed to make you feel.

“He’s leaving now.” Willow whispered as her eyes followed him around the room before she dropped them to the table. “He’s gone.”

————

You couldn’t help but to be nervous but you attempted to put it all aside as you clutched you ribs, lying on the canvas after Anna kicked into your side, probably a little harder than she should have. You knew what was coming as soon as Jack’s music hit and he came running down the ramp with the FTW title in hand.

You grabbed Anna’s feet before she could reach him, swiftly making her fall flat against the canvas in an attempt to protect yourself from the inevitable. That’s when Hook’s music hit and a sudden pop from the crowd made your ears ring.

He didn’t run down the ramp like Jack did, but it took him only a few seconds to get his hands on the man. Hook snatched the title and threw it to the floor before he threw a series of punches to Jack’s chest, while you and Anna were throwing punches to each other’s jaws. She was hitting you with a force that felt a little more personal than just entertainment purposes. You wondered if she meant that or not.

She grabbed your wrist and slung you against the turnbuckles, hitting your back so hard you sprung foward and fell to your knees. It was all planned, but you were taking one hell of a beating.

That’s when Hook and Jack had the referee distracted enough for Anna to grab the belt. Just as you were getting on your feet, you felt the impact against the side of your head knocking you down flat, staring up at the bright lights of the arena as she pinned you.

The three count came fast and her music rang through your ears. You laid there like you were dazed and confused and thankfully she didn’t actually hit you with it too hard. You had a little pain but nothing like it would’ve been if she would’ve intended to knock you out cold.

The crowd was booing jack and Anna both, but they roared with cheers when Hook slid under the ropes. You felt a warm hand sneak beneath your shoulder before he helped you sit up. There was no script to go off of so you weren’t sure if anything should’ve been said, but nobody would’ve heard over the thousands of screams piercing your ears.

Taz was on commentary hyping the interaction up for the added affect of the viewers watching on tv.

“I don’t know when those two became friends, but I’ll tell you one thing, Y/N has a good one in her corner. If Hook has your back, you know you’re gonna be alright. Jack and Anna better watch out now boys.”

Hook leaned down and grabbed your hand, pulling you up to your feet. The crowd was absolutely wild, and it was a reaction you really didn’t expect. He silently nodded towards the ramp as he let go of your hand. You walked ahead of him, slipping out of the ropes and making your way towards the tunnels, clutching your side and your head for the added affect.

You looked over your shoulder to find hook close behind, his eyes locked on you the second you spared a glance. Just before you reached the tunnels, you heard his voice, somehow over all the commotion around the arena.

“Wait” he caused you to turn around, now inches apart from you. Your eyes widened when you realized the closeness, before you felt his hand grab yours again and hold it up in the air, turning you towards the crowd that was on the verge of losing their minds.

He pointed at you, nodding as he took in the reactions. You were trying to soak it all in but it all had you confused. Assuming he was really good at selling, you tried to ignore the fact that his harsh words had been running through your mind for the past week, but due to that, you didn’t expect all of this.

He dropped your hand and nodded towards the tunnel, letting you lead the way. As soon as you got away from the chaos in the arena, you turned around to face him. Part of you wanted to ask why he was so rude to you last week but the other part of you was screaming for you not to.

Hook’s brows knitted together when you looked up at him. The last thing you probably should’ve been thinking about was the first one that came to mind simply because your brain did that sometimes.

He was wearing a black hoodie, black pants and looked like the walking depiction of darkness with the way his hair casted over nearly half of his face. Meanwhile you had on all white ring gear coupled with white nails and the comparison must have looked nothing less than polar opposites when you stood side by side.

But then you heard him say, “Are you just gonna stand there and stare at me?”

That’s when you realized you’d just been staring up at him, feeling your cheeks immediately burn beneath your skin when he called you out for it. Hook saw the way your face flushed and a rosy tint dusted over. Then he noticed a gold cross sitting against your chest much like his own. He didn’t comment on it, obviously.

You wanted to redeem yourself but couldn’t muster words at that point and he stared down at you awaiting a response or simply for you to move out of his way, which is exactly what you did.

The second you stepped to the side, he slipped past you, brushing your shoulder on his way down the hall. You stood there with a bit of a dumbfounded look on your face as you watched him leave without sparing you another glance.

———

Another week passed by and again, you and hook hadn’t spoke, but your tagged photos on instagram were nothing but you and him from Dynamite the week prior. It was funny how many fans were going crazy for a duo that was anything but when you weren’t on cameras.

You’d looked down at your phone when it buzzed and a text from Tony came through. You were put in the group chat with a 363 area code and debated whether or not you should save him in your contacts.

The text was the instructions for a segment later on. You and hook were going to be spotted talking in the hallway. He sent the full script and with only an hour to memorize and apologized for the last minute scheduling.

You were typing back when another message popped up. It was from hook, nothing but a short and simple reply saying, “All good” meanwhile you’d typed almost a whole paragraph about how it was okay, don’t apologize and you were going to get to memorizing right now. Needless to say, you deleted that and typed back, “No problem, I’ll have them memorized.”

You then scrolled up the long message, unsure if you could actually sell this with such a short amount of study time. You didn’t want to screw up on live tv.

Your lips moved as you read over the lines. It would’ve been way easier if you could actually rehearse them with someone but clearly hook wasn’t going to be down for that and Skye and Willow both had the night off, which was the reason you were sitting alone in catering.

You tried to focus but you felt that feeling again. Eyes on you, unavailable. He was somewhere in the room and you could feel it. He was staring at you again, and you didn’t even have to find him to be able to tell that.

You couldn’t keep your mind on the script now that you knew you were being watched. You wondered why he was staring in the first place. What was his problem with you after all?

The temptations got the better of you and you finally tore your eyes from your phone, only to find him sitting directly across from you at the next table over. Like you already knew, staring.

He didn’t bother to snatch his gaze off of you. He was shameless about the way he watched you. You couldn’t help it when your nerves grabbed strong hold of you and out blurted, “Are you just gonna sit there and stare?”, loud enough for the people around to hear, earning their attention.

Hook didn’t acknowledge them. He didn’t even blink. Didn’t move a single muscle and that’s when you decided to get up and walk over to him, despite the way his dark eyes made you want to take off running.

You approached his table and took a seat directly across from him. He tilted his head back slightly and crossed his arms over his chest. His brows raised in an expectant manner and you could feel the eyes of talent all around focused on the two of you.

“Why do you keep staring at me?” You called him out the same way he did to you last week in the tunnel. He kept a stoic expression as his eyes dropped down to your phone in hand on top of the table. He decided to avoid your question to ask one of his own.

“You think you can sell that segment later?”

Caught off guard, you felt your brows knit together, looking down at your phone which served as a reminder that you needed to be studying those lines.

“I’m gonna do my best.” You answered honestly, looking back at him. “Are you not going to go over your lines?”

“I already know them.”

“The text just came in like five minutes ago.” You pointed out.

“And I already know them, and yours.” He coolly states before he grabs the bookbag from the seat next to him and stands up. “Don’t mess up.” He says before he tries to leave.

“Wait!” Your voice didn’t do you any favors when it came out a little squeakier than you intended, but it kept him there. “Can you help me go over them?”

He stared down at you, face unreadable as always. There was a pause before he said, “If I didn’t have to get ready for my match, maybe I’d consider.” Then he headed out of catering, leaving you alone at the table.

———

You headed down the hallway where you were supposed to shoot the segment. Hook was already there, leaning against the wall with his phone in hand. He had his ring gear on, a couple red marks on his chest and sweat glistening off his skin. He must have just came back from his match.

Nobody else was around yet. You slowly walked over to him and stood against the opposite wall in front of him. He finished typing something before he picked his head up and looked down at you. You did your best not to spare him a glance as you continued going over your lines.

“It’s a little late to be trying to memorize them now.” You heard him mutter.

“I think I have them memorized, actually.” You look up at him, now leaning back with arms crossed. His hair was absolutely unruly and you couldn’t help but stifle a laugh when you saw it up close. The way it was standing straight up over his head reminded you of Chicken Little.

“What?” His brows knit when he catches your reaction.

“Sorry” you shake your head and wipe the smirk off your face. “It’s your hair.”

“What about my hair?”

“It’s like, standing straight up.” You point out, watching his eyes squint at you.

“It’s hair. It does that.” He deadpanned.

“Mine never does.”

“That’s ‘cause Anna’s always pulling yours out.” He bantered back, and for the first time you thought maybe you saw his lips tip up in a smirk, but as soon as you caught it, he wiped it away.

“She is not always pulling it out. That was one time. And that was so long ago, how do you even know that?”

Silence suddenly filled the hallway. He didn’t have an answer for that and thankfully for him, the cameraman made his way around the corner just in time.

“Alright, ready?” He calls out to the both of you. You take one more quick glance at your phone before shoving it in your pocket and taking in a deep breath.

Hook pushed himself off the wall and whispered, “Don’t mess up.” Before he stood behind you, close enough that when you turned around, you had to put a little space between you.

“Action.”

“Y/N.” Hook suddenly spoke. “You can’t let anyone walk all over you in this company. It’s time for you to take control. You need to start fighting fire with fire.”

He was right when he said he had his parts memorized. It was so effortless to him. He went from one persona to the next in a matter of seconds.

You tried to hide the surprise on your face and snap into character. He eyed you skeptically, you could clearly tell he was expecting you to mess up.

“I don’t want to play dirty, Hook. That’s gonna be my karma when it comes back to bite me.” First line down, you didn’t think it was too bad.

“Or maybe Anna Jay and Jack Perry’s karma is us. Did you ever think about that?” He raised his voice and took a step foward unexpectedly, backing you against the wall. You were suddenly flustered but knew you had to force that away.

“Jack knocked me out with the same title Anna hit you with. My FTW title. They’re cornering you and you’re allowing it! What’s gonna happen when you’re in the hospital with a concussion next time and I can’t save you?”

His chest started heaving as hot breaths fanned against your skin. He was way too good at this.

“What do you want me to do, Hook? You want me to be evil like they are? That’s not me!”

A second passed and you saw the way his eyes dropped down to some other part of your face, suddenly making you self conscious about whatever caught his attention. Then, he leaned in even closer, his chest brushing against yours when he inhaled.

“If you’re gonna be with me, you have to be tougher than this. That sweet, innocent personality of yours isn’t going to get us anywhere, and I’m not gonna stand by while you let yourself get assaulted every week. It’s time to start fighting back, Y/N.”

Half of that line, you didn’t recall memorizing. It threw you off a little bit, and thanks to that, you couldn’t remember your final line. You suddenly got anxious, mouth falling open with no words coming out. Hook picked up on this, not letting too much time pass before he tried to jog your memory.

“You don’t have anything to say? You’re okay with these people tormenting us? You want them to take everything from us?”

You hoped he could hear you silently thanking him. You knew that wasn’t a line but he kept it going for the sake of embarrassing yourself.

“If you want me to fight back, then let me do it my way.” You recited, shooting him your best glare for the dramatics. “I’m not turning cold for you, but that doesn’t mean I can’t beat her ass so bad she’ll wish she never stepped foot in a ring with me.”

His lips turned upwards in the faintest hint of a smirk and this time you were certain on it before he quickly brought that straight face back for the camera and nodded his head saying his last line.

“I’m gonna hold you to that.”

“Cut”

The camera man left you and hook in the hallway. As soon as the camera wasn’t on you an enormous weight was lifted off of your shoulders, finally able to take a deep breath, but the air around quickly got suffocating all over again.

Hook didn’t move. He was still standing close enough to you that you felt pinned to the wall. He held those infamously dark eyes on you for a moment, studying you. In his mind, he didn’t see the value of having you as a partner. He couldn’t understand why he got paired with someone who looks like they’d cry the minute someone raised their voice.

You just appeared to him as a sweet, innocent person and not in the way that he intended for it to be a compliment. Sweet and innocent wasn’t his thing. He needed someone just as coldhearted and vengeful as him.

Nevertheless, he was with you now until this storyline ends and his dad told him during a conversation they had a few days prior, that he needs to look at things a little bit differently. Taz seemed to think that he needed someone like you by his side. The coldhearted handsome devil needed a conscious and in his dad’s mind, a babyface with the reputation of being a walking ray of sunshine was the angel on Hook’s shoulder.

He carefully considered his dad’s perspective, but then aroused ideas of his own. A concept that he pitched to Tony that you had no idea what was coming. Plans to take your squeaky clean image and transform it into something greater, something more complimentary to himself.

You eyed him, swallowing past a thick lump accumulating in your throat before you managed to speak in a voice almost weary.

“Why are you staring at me like that?”

Hook’s head tilted to the side, as if he was intrigued by the simple question. Your wide eyes reminded him of a skittish puppy ready to bolt, and he was surprised you haven’t yet.

“I thought you had your lines memorized?” He countered your question.

“I did, until you decided to improvise.” You quickly blurted, feeling like you exaggerated that defense. His brows raised slightly from beneath the thick hair against his forehead before he took a step back, putting space between you for the first time in what felt like an eternity.

“See you next week.” He muttered before he disappeared around the corner.

———

Two nights later, as you got cozy in bed, just about to doze off, your phone buzzed with a text from that same area code you recognized as Hook.

“been talking to my dad. you need to learn redrum. im in the hotel gym”

You glanced at the time, nearly baffled when you realized it was one-thirty in the morning. You texted back a quick reply.

“Right now? This can’t wait until tomorrow? And why do I need to learn your moves? I have moves of my own.”

You stared at the message until the delivered turned into read at 1:32 and locked your phone until he texted back.

“im going to bed at 2”

You stared at that simple little message and knew it was basically him not giving much of an option. You huffed as you slid out of bed, never minding to change out of your sweatpants or do anything with yourself for that matter. It was almost two in the morning. You should be asleep.

The elevators brought you down to the first floor. You headed across the lobby towards the gym. You could hear the sound of a punching bag being hit three times each even through the closed door.

You walked in, to your surprise finding Hook and Taz both. Taz was keeping the punching bag steady while Hook threw his fists into it, but that came to an abrupt halt when taz spotted you first.

“Ah, there she is.” His voice echoed through the empty room. “Didn’t think you’d actually show.” He chuckled, turning to his son. “Tyler and I have been talking about that upcoming tagteam match between you and the goofballs, we think if the crowd saw a double redrum they’d go nuts.”

You glanced at hook, now with the new knowledge that his name was actually Tyler, and for some reason that’s all that registered in that moment. He was looking at his dad, not even sparing a glance in your direction until Taz gave him a strong pat on his bare back and said, “I’ll leave you to it son. Your mother’s waiting for me.”

You held the door open to let him through, offering a faint smile. Taz stopped before he left the room, looking over his shoulder at his son, “Polite too” he commented, and you weren’t sure what that was supposed to mean but didn’t ask either. “Don’t hurt him too bad.” He muttered with an amused grin before he headed out.

You closed the door and stepped a little farther in the room. Taz seemed to have taken that lighthearted energy with him when he left because once again, the air was thick. It felt hot and heavy in your lungs and it made no sense to you why that was always the case when you were around him.

He stood at the front of the room with his hands on his hips. He looked like he’d been at it for hours what with the way his cheeks were bright red and sweat was covering every visible inch of his body, and drenching his hair.

“Do you always work out at two in the morning?” You asked as you drew a little closer, feeling like you were physically walking on eggshells.

“I go to sleep at two.” He replied, rather breathlessly. His eyes adverted down to your t-shirt and sweats, and the fuzzy slippers you put on before you left the hotel room. “Apparently you do too.”

“I was almost asleep when you texted.” You defended yourself and your cozy loungewear. “I’m not going to throw on a whole outfit just to come down to the gym.”

“Real shoes either.” He countered.

You looked down at the slippers and then back up at him. “They’re comfy. I don’t care.”

“Clearly.” He nodded. “Doesn’t matter. You familiar with any of my moves at all?”

You could’ve told him that you’d watched some of his matches in the viewing room before but something told you that he would think you were weird for that, so you simply shrugged and said, “kind of, not really.”

The way he eyed you made you think he knew you were lying.

“Never seen me do redrum?” He questioned, raising his brows.

“Maybe like one time.” You lied again, and that’s when his eyes narrowed, as if he was reading right through the bullshit.

He pushed his hair back and let his hand fall to his side with a smack to his hip before he stepped away from the punching bag and over to a bench, grabbing an almost empty water bottle and chugging the rest.

He crumbled the plastic before tossing it in the trash can halfway across the room and walking back over. He stood in front of you. It seemed to you like the man didn’t know the definition of personal space.

“Are you familiar with a half nelson at least?”

You shot him a questionable look, feeling the sarcasm dripping from his question.

“Pretty sure everyone is.” You crossed your arms, deadpanning on him in an attempt to dish it right back. His lips fold in and that’s when you couldn’t help but notice a dimple on his right cheek.

“Alright then-“ he held his arms out to his sides. “Put me in one.”

You shot him another look, wondering if that was a serious request or not. He stared at you, clearly waiting. It didn’t seem probable since the man towered over you.

“How do I do that when you’re like, six foot tall?” You asked, holding your own arms out. “I’m obviously too short to reach.”

“Size doesn’t matter. It’s the way you utilize your body. Anna’s taller than you, how do you expect to put her in a choke? Wait for her to get down?”

“I wasn’t planning to until you said I needed to learn your moves. I have a couple of my own.”

“And clearly they don’t work too well.” He counters comebacks quickly, you realize.

“If you can’t reach, use your legs first.” He instructed, suddenly having a more serious edge to his voice. “If that means you have to jump on their back, then do that. I’ve had to a time or two.” He shrugged before he waved you foward.

You dropped your arms and eyed him skeptically. An uneasy feeling was trying to take over simply because the thought of wrestling around with a man twice your size didn’t seem like the smartest idea.

“You’re not gonna sling me over your shoulder or something, are you?”

You caught the brief flash of confusion that crossed through his eyes before they returned to that cold stare he perfected.

“No, Y/N.” He huffed in annoyance. “I’m not gonna do anything but let you take me down. I’m gonna fall foward though, not back, so if you go flying off of me that’s on you.”

In his mind he was wondering why you were so apprehensive about this. Did you really think he was going to hurt you? He might not be all that friendly but he didn’t have intentions to harm you. Either way, he pushed past those thoughts and focused on the task at hand.

You nodded in understanding before you circled around him, taking a step back for more momentum when you sprung foward. Your legs wrapped tightly around his waist, knees locking in underneath his ribs and you heard a low grunt reverberate through his throat.

“Am I hurting you?” You loosened your legs but felt his hands grab them, keeping you wrapped tightly around him.

“Nope, always keep your legs tight. I’m good. Lock it in.”

You did as you were told, snaking one arm beneath his jaw and the other under his arm, bringing it up and pushing his head down until you felt him falling foward with a low, “Fuck” beneath his breath.

You held on tight as his knees hit the floor and he tapped on your arm quickly. You unwrapped yourself and stood back up, offering your hand to help him to his feet, but he ignored it.

“Was that right?” You asked, feeling somewhat prideful about the way you just brought a six foot tall, two hundred pound man down to his knees with his own finisher.

He nodded, rubbing his neck. “Yeah, that was right.” He cleared his throat. He then eyed you with a somewhat unreadable look on his face, eyes slightly narrowed.

“What?” You asked.

“You’ve never seen that before?” He resorted back to his previous question from earlier.

“I told you I have once.” You reminded him, but again, human lie detector comes out of him and it was evident.

“Most people don’t get it right the first time after seeing me do it more than once.”

“Well I did.” You shrugged, watching as he peered those eyes at you, reading straight through the bullshit once more just to hum in response.

“Not very believable but alright.” He muttered before he walked over to the bench and sat down, grabbing his hoodie and tossing it over his shoulder. You felt your clothes sticking to your body with sweat that wasn’t your own and peeled the fabric from your skin, just for it to stick right back.

Hook noticed this. “You got a little sweat on you.” He comments obviously.

“Do I? I didn’t notice.” You sarcastically replied, and another unreadable expression played on his face, one that had you wondering what he was thinking, but you didn’t ask. It returned back to that blank, emotionless look moments after.

“I have a match Wednesday.” He said as he ran his hand through his unruly hair. “You should probably be ringside.”

“Did Tony say that? I haven’t heard anything.”

“I’m saying that.” He leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees, looking up at you. Your mouth clamped shut with that response. He clearly saw the mixed reaction playing on your face and made it a point to clarify.

“The more we’re together, the more we’ll sell.”

But something told you otherwise and you weren’t sure what. Something was nagging at you about his actual motives. If you remember correctly, he didn’t seem too pleased about being paired up with you to begin with.

“I didn’t think you cared so much about this storyline.” You tested. “You seemed really unhappy about it when we were in Tony’s office. And after, especially.” You referred to the first little conversation, or lack there of, in the hallway.

He looked down at his knuckles and a few scars on them before he looked back up at you.

“If we have to do it, I want to at least make it good.” He said, ignoring basically everything you just said. “That means we need to sell it. So we need to be seen together a lot more. Nobody’s gonna believe it if we’re only shot on segments and nowhere else.”

You nodded, understanding that fact.

“So when I have a match, you be there. When you have a match, I’ll be there.” He then stood up and threw on the black hoodie you always saw him wear at work before he walked past you, muttering a low, “see you Wednesday” under his breath before the gym doors shut behind him.

———

“Sounds like he wants to fuck you.” Willow bluntly stated after you told her and Skye all about what’s been going on lately. You felt your cheeks practically burn your skin but looked away in an attempt to hide it.

“Agreed.” Skye adds in. “Looks like someone’s not so coldhearted after all.”

“No, he definitely is.” You affirm with a quick nod. “He’s just good at selling a storyline. He’s a different person on camera than he is elsewhere.”

“He looks pretty angry all the time to me. On camera and every time I pass his grumpy ass in the halls” Willow chuckled and you couldn’t help but do the same. “And if he’s trying to sell the story purely, I don’t think he’d bother getting you down to the gym at almost two in the morning.”

“Well it was to teach me his finisher for when we have that tagteam match.” You justified, but they didn’t buy it.

“That could’ve waited for a day time hour, Y/N.” Skye tried to convince you, but there was no use in that. You looked at the time and realized his match was starting soon. You got up from the seat, thankful for an excuse to leave the conversation.

“I’m needed ringside.” You tell them, noting the smirks on their face before you left.

Hook was already in the gorilla waiting for his music to hit when you finally got there. His back was turned and head hung as he pushed himself back and to against the bars.

“Hey.” You breathlessly said, due to nearly racing to be in time. He turned his head, looking over his shoulder as he kept doing what looked to you like mid air push ups, assuming it was just something he did to get amped up.

His eyes adverted down to your shirt. You didn’t have a match tonight so you didn’t bother throwing on your ring gear. He was wearing all black this time, and you were wearing a bright yellow top and black shorts.

“Hey sunshine.” He said with a condescending, mocking tone as he eyed your apparel.

“Sunshine? Why? Because of my shirt?” You asked. “Was I supposed to match you or something?”

He shook his head and dropped it, exposing that dimple again. He pushed himself off the rails to stand up straight, looking down at you rather dramatically with the way he dropped his head.

“I didn’t say anything about your clothes.”

“You insinuated by the way you looked at my yellow shirt, then called me sunshine.” You pointed out, watching an amused grin spread across his lips before he dropped his head to cover it. You know you weren’t mistaking.

It was then that his music hit and the pop of the arena was already ringing your ears. He headed through the tunnel and you followed, unsure what you were actually supposed to do now that you were here.

The crowd went crazy when hook came out, but nearly insane when you popped out right behind him. He stopped at the top of the ramp to look amongst the sea of faces, and you endured it all next to him. You turned to look at him, only to find him staring down at you.

He nodded towards the ring, signaling for you to take the lead, so you did. On commentary once again, Taz was hyping it up for the viewers at home.

“That’s hook right there folks. The coldhearted handsome devil. He’s being accompanied by one of AEW’s crowd favorites, Y/N for this match. These two have been joined at the hip ever since Anna Jay knocked her upside the head with the FTW title. They’ve got each others backs, I’ll tell you that much.”

If you could hear commentary it would probably make you laugh just how much his dad sells the storyline.

You stopped at the end of the ramp and waited for hook to walk down. He stopped next to you for a moment, the cameraman panning in on the two of you taking in the crowd reactions before he nodded towards where you would be standing, signaling for you to take your place while he rounds the ring.

When the bell rings and the match gets started, you watch on from where you stood leaning against the canvas. You’ve seen a few of his matches but never up close. It was clear exactly why he was favored in this industry. His quickness and agility was otherworldly. He was fast thinking and cleverly destructive.

He made quick work of getting his opponent down. It had only taken about three and a half minutes and the redrum was locked in, and seconds after, his music boomed through the arena.

You clapped genuinely, watching as he got to his feet and slipped out the ring on your side. He nodded towards the tunnels and by this point you already knew to take the lead while he walks behind you. No idea why he prefers it that way, but you didn’t question.

When you reached the stage, you stopped and turned to face the crowd. He got up next to you and looked at you questionably when you grabbed his wrist, even though he already knew what you were going to do.

You raised his hand in the air and listened to the crowd explode. The pop was unlike anything you’d witnessed yourself, and it was doing a pretty good job at bringing your confidence level way up.

“Probably one of AEW’s most unlikely duos. The coldhearted handsome devil and Y/N look like night and day standing next to each other.” Excalibur mentions on commentary.

“Their appearances may be complete opposites but don’t let that fool you my guy. These two are a force to be reckoned with.” Taz adds.

You get halfway through the tunnel when you look over your shoulder to find hook trailing closely behind you.

“Good job.” You smile at him, though he doesn’t return the smile back. You didn’t expect him to, anyway. He hummed in response and dropped his head, ruffling his hair.

Just then, a text came through to your phone. You pulled it out of your pocket and read the group chat message.

“It’s Tony.” You tell hook. “He said me being ringside was a nice touch for whoever’s idea that was. Want me to tell him it was yours?”

“Nah.” He shortly replied. “Did he say anything else?” He asked, seeming a little curious.

“No.” You told him, watching as he nods once. “What do you think we’ll be doing next? Another segment? When even is this tagteam match happening?”

“Ask him.” He mutters.

He wasn’t saying much all of the sudden which confused you. It was like he retreated into a shell after he decided he didn’t like the outside world for the two minutes he experienced it.

“Are you tired?” You asked, noticing the questioning glance he gave you.

“No?”

“Oh. You sound tired.” You added as you headed down the hall with him, unsure where you were actually going since you just got caught up in talking to him.

“Not tired” he sighed, giving you the impression that he didn’t want to talk at all anymore. Or maybe he never even did in the first place.

“Alright well, I’ll see you next week then.” Your voice was far weaker than his was. He slowed down but didn’t stop, muttering “alright” before he kept walking down the hallway, leaving you standing in the middle of it for what felt like the hundredth time watching him leave.

———

A text from Tony came through two days later. It was a graph with the ratings for Wednesday night’s show and apparently the interactions with you and Hook brought a lot of attention on.

You were typing a reply when another message came through. It was next weeks plans for the two of you. Reading over it, you couldn’t help but to be confused. Apparently you were supposed to interfere in one of Anna’s matches that Jack was going to be standing ringside for. This time, you were going to be the one using the belt against her after hook takes it from jack.

Sounded like heel work in your opinion.

You didn’t reply due to the fact that you weren’t sure what to say, but hook did. His message came through a few minutes after the text was sent and was nothing but a simple okay emoji.

That night, you received a text from hook. It was short and simple like all the other ones had been.

“you own any black clothes?”

You felt like you could feel the sarcasm through the screen. What kind of question was that?

“Why?” You replied, not having much time to close your phone before another one came through.

“so we can match”

You understood the reasoning but weren’t super thrilled about black of all colors.

“Do you own anything other than black clothes?” You retorted. This time there was a pause between messages.

“what color do you want to wear, y/n” if you were standing in front of him having this conversation you just knew he’d have that bored look on his face. You thought for a minute about a reasonable color. Then decided on one he probably would glare at you for.

“Got anything yellow?” You grinned to yourself knowing that he was probably going to roll his eyes at that one.

“no.”

“Fine… Blue?”

“no.”

“Red?”

“no. wear black wednesday”

You stared down at that message for a moment debating on what to say back. You looked across the room at your suitcase overflowing with clothes but you already knew the only article of clothing you brought with you that was all black was a dress you wore to go out in. Nothing reasonable for the show.

“I don’t have anything black suitable for tv.”

“how would something not be suitable? just wear it”

You sighed deeply as you walked over to your suitcase and pulled out the dress that you only wore once simply because it rode up way too high all night long. You threw it on the bed and snapped a picture, sending it to him.

“This is it and I’m not wearing it.”

There was a couple moments that passed before you received a message back.

“i don’t see the issue”

“It’s revealing.”

“so is your ring gear but you still wear it?” You stared at that message wondering why you were standing in the middle of the room arguing with that man right now. And still, you continue to do so.

“That’s ring gear. That’s different.”

This time, a good five minutes pass by before he replies. You had just tossed your phone on the bed when you figured he was done texting only to grab it almost as quickly as you tossed it when your phone buzzed again.

“ill bring one of my hoodies then”

On the other end of the phone, Tyler was sitting at a restaurant table with his dad going over the next couple of weeks.

Taz was the one who told him that the two of you should match and it would probably do good at winning over the crowd and the viewers, but he was thinking more along the lines of his son wearing something other than the typical black attire he exhausts.

“It’s funny seeing you two up on that stage” taz chuckles as he digs his fork into his pasta. “You’re like the moon and she’s the sun, for now at least”

Tyler’s eyes lifted from his phone. He was staring at the three little dots while he awaited your response. He said he’d bring you one of his hoodies and for some reason he was apprehensive about sending that message. It felt like odd territory to him to be letting you wear his clothes, but apparently all you had was a little black dress you didn’t feel comfortable wearing.

“And I’ll tell you another thing, when you two team up in that ring, the fans are gonna lose their freakin’ minds”

Just then, a text came through and for some reason a slight smile landed on tyler’s lips, until his dad called it out.

“Who’s that?” He questioned, trying to lean foward to steal a glance at his son’s phone. He was quick to lock it and stuff it in his pocket.

“Y/N.” He muttered before he dug his own fork into his food.

“Have you talked to her about the turn yet?” Taz asked, and Tyler froze for a second.

“Nah, not yet.”

“She doesn’t know?” He questioned, looking a bit taken back. “What does she think the plans for you two are? You have to tell her, son.”

“I’m pretty sure she’ll figure it out on her own.” He grumbled, leaning back in his seat and dropping the fork against his plate.

“Tyler” taz shot him a look, “It was your idea. You need to be the one to tell her straight.”

And it was his idea. He approached Tony shortly after he left you in the hallway that first time the two of you talked, and pitched the idea that you should have a heel run by his side. Tony wasn’t apprehensive at all. To him, and to Hook, the idea of an America’s Sweetheart type of personality completely doing a 180 with the coldhearted handsome devil was golden.

It was just that he told Tony that he’d talk to you about it and never did. Plans had changed from the originality of the first idea and you had no clue about it.

“What’s gonna happen when she’s supposed to go out in front of thousands of people as a heel, and she’s thinking she’s still this babyface character?” Taz reasons, making Tyler drop his eyes to the table.

“She needs time to prepare. It’s not easy going a complete 180 son. Especially not if you wait until last minute to tell her.”

He retrieved his phone from his pocket and read your message back.

“Thank you” was all you said. His thumbs hovered over the screen before he finally managed a response. It was hard to put it into words for some reason and when he realized what it sounded like, he had to send a double text for clarification.

“can you come to my room later”

“to talk. it’s kinda important”

———

Later meant way later than you expected when Hook sent you the text letting you know what room number he was in at midnight.

Regardless of how tired you were, you were way more anxious than anything to figure out what was so important. You reached room 235 and knocked on his door. You heard some shuffling around before he opened it, hair even messier than usual and eyes low, like he was on the verge of passing out himself.

He stepped back and waved you in. You walked in and eyed him as he walked around you. He didn’t sit down anywhere and you didn’t make yourself comfy either. This was awkward. Probably the most awkward encounter you’ve had with him yet.

Truth was that he was a little nervous. He didn’t know how you were going to take the fact that this entire time, you were working on a heel turn without even knowing it. And he was the one behind it all.

He looked down at you, leaning against the wall as he contemplated the best way to go about the conversation. He never really got nervous about anything so this was fairly new and rather uncomfortable for him.

“Did you get that message from Tony about Wednesday?” He started off by asking, and you slowly nodded. You eyed him, trying to read an unreadable man.

“What did you think about it?” He was doing a good job at reading you though. Wasn’t hard since you had a tendency to wear your emotions on your face. He could tell you were skeptical of him in that moment by the way you stared at him solely. He’s seen that look from you a couple dozen times already and the only other one he can recognize that easily is the look you give when he makes a smart comment to you.

“You mean about me using the title to hit Anna? It sounded like heel work to me.” You told him, watching as he nodded.

“Cause it is.”

You blinked twice. “I’m not a heel.”

“I talked to Tony about this storyline a while back. We agreed it’s a better idea if you have a heel run with me.”

You stared up at him, a bit lost. The original idea was for the babyfaces to win in the end, since jack and Anna were already heels. Now it turns out that you had a whole new character transition coming you didn’t even know about in the first place and frankly, you were unsure how to feel.

“Wait so this whole time I’ve been working on turning heel? And you knew that and didn’t tell me?” You peered your eyes at him, glaring. “Why not?”

“Never had the chance, I guess.” He shrugged.

“Never had the chance?” You felt your eyes form into small slits. “You had plenty. How come you got to decide what I do with my gimmick and I didn’t even get the chance to give my opinion?”

Just then, a voice popped into his head, belonging to his dad. Women don’t like when you lie to them, son.

He didn’t intend to lie. It just happened that way. He kind of assumed you’d catch on with the whole heel turn thing and not ask questions but now that he knows you a little better, he knows better than that.

“Your goody two shoes persona wasn’t working well for you anyway, Y/N. We knew it wouldn’t sell for a storyline like this so we came up with something better. If Tony pitched the idea you wouldn’t be getting all fired up at him”

“It’s not the fact that I’ll be turning heel, it’s the fact that nobody told me. Especially you.” You pointed out. You weren’t even mad about the new plans. You would’ve agreed to it anyway if that was the first idea Tony pitched, but you were walking around with no idea what was coming for you and that alone made you more nervous than you needed to be.

“Maybe you didn’t realize, but this is my very first storyline. The last thing I want to do is blow my chance at another one and I’ve been going around absolutely oblivious to the fact that I’m expected to do a whole heel turn in who knows how soon, and you just let me look stupid when you were the one who unrightfully came up with the idea in the first place!”

You rarely yelled at people and he rarely ever got yelled at. It was heightening the tensions between both of you and he expected as much, but didn’t foresee you chewing him out this bad.

“You’re not going around looking stupid! Tony gives you the rundown every week. You know what’s coming and if you didn’t by now you would’ve figured it out.”

You were somewhat baffled by his defensiveness. There was no true justification to what he omitted and he probably knew that full well and just didn’t want to admit he was wrong.

“Yeah, like last minute!” You shout, not meaning to be as loud as you were but you couldn’t help it. “This means something to me, Tyler!”

The use of his name took him back a little and you didn’t mean for that to slip in the first place but for some reason Hook wasn’t the first name to come out in that moment.

Just then, there was a knock on his door that caught both of your attentions.

“Go away” he shouted, but that’s when his dad’s voice reached both of you.

“Open the door, son.”

He rolled his eyes as he walked over. Opening the door and taking a step back so taz could walk in. It was strange to see him wearing pajamas but you ignored that.

“I can hear you two across the hall. What is going on in here?”

Tyler looked at you for a second before he looked back at his dad. “She’s not happy about the heel run.”

“No-“ you stepped forward, correcting him. “I’m not happy about being lied to.”

Taz gave his son a look. A stern I told you so kind of glance.

“Alright” taz held his hands up, “I get that, Y/N. I told this man that he needed to let you know what was going on and not at the very last minute. He doesn’t listen to nobody but himself and half the time that steers him wrong.”

“Clearly.” You huffed out, crossing your arms.

He turned to Tyler and shrugged. “This one’s on you bud. Make it right but keep it down. We don’t need to draw attention.”

You nodded and taz made his way back out, leaving you and Tyler alone once again. He dropped his head and ran his hands through his hair, thinking.

“I’m not happy about this.” You state.

“Couldn’t tell.” He muttered under his breath. The fact that he had the audacity to be sarcastic was mind blowing to you. It made you actually want to scream at him but the last thing you wanted was Taz to come back and give you both some sort of lecture or something.

Tyler picked his head up, tired eyes landing on you. “I’m sorry for not telling you sooner.” He said, shrugging his shoulders. It was a half ass apology but the only one he’d ever given. He never really cared to give anyone that type of respect, or what he thinks is respect in his mind.

“There was no reason why you kept it from me.” You remind him, watching him nod.

“I know.” He sighed.

“And I have a right to be mad right now because my whole entire image is about to change dramatically and I haven’t even been prepared for it.”

“Yeah, but you’re not doing it all on your own. You’re doing it with me. I’m turning too.”

“Yeah, but you had time to prepare for that.” You pointedly state. “How much time do I have? Literally I’m about to start at the next show and I didn’t even realize it.”

“It’s not something you really have to prepare for, Y/N. You just go out there and put on a show. It’s not much different than what we do right now.” He walked around you and made his way to the bed, sitting down on the edge.

“It’s different for me. I’m not mean in general. I need to practice.”

You watched a weird look cross over his face, bringing his lips up in a faint smirk. “You’re not mean?” He quirked a brow. “Not even a little bit?”

“No?” You shrugged.

You heard a low chuckle before he looked down at his phone in hand. You sighed when you realized that this conversation was probably going nowhere fast and the best thing you could do was accept the reality of the situation and work with what you’re dealing with.

“Since you seem to think it’s easy becoming a whole different person, tell me where to start.” You plopped down on the chair awkwardly positioned halfway across the room. His eyes lifted from his phone before he tossed it to the side.

“It’s just acting, Y/N. It’s not like you’re becoming a different person all together. It’s literally one day out of the week that you put on a tough face and sell a gimmick. There’s nothing complicated about it. You’re complicating it yourself.”

You glared at him and the annoyance that was so evident in his tone. He sighed and leaned back on his hands, his eyes lowering by the second.

“I guess just start acting like you hate the world. Go out there and give everyone the biggest eat shit look. Be a little more aggressive in the ring and more no fucks given outside of it.” He advised, watching you nod before you stood up from the chair.

“So basically, be more like you.” You pointed out. Before he could respond to that, you held up your hand to silence him. “Got it.” You said before you left his room.

———

“Doesn’t make sense why he didn’t tell you.” Skye says as you and her head down the hall towards catering. “It’s literally your gimmick changing.”

“I know.” You roll your eyes. You were sick and tired of thinking on it. At this point you’d decided to stop wishing you would’ve known beforehand, since clearly there was no changing that, and take the bull by the horns.

Even though Tyler told you that nothing really changes, everything was about to. Your persona, your ring gear, especially your attitude. You had a lot of winning over to do and you were determined to use this transformation to the best of your ability. No matter how bitter you might feel about the fact that he kept the whole thing from you for weeks.

“Doesn’t matter. I’m gonna be a good heel. I’ve been thinking about all of it. I have tons of ideas and I’m starting to actually get excited about it.” You told her, rounding the corner.

“Speak of the devil.” Skye muttered. “Want me to wait up for you or are you good?”

“I’m good.” You nod as you watch him slowly approach with a black hoodie on and one draped across his shoulder.

He got a look from Skye as she passed by but he didn’t pay attention. He pulled that hoodie off of his shoulder and handed it to you wordlessly. You eyed him as you took it from his hand and threw it over your own shoulder. You hadn’t spoke since that night in his room and he’d been meaning to ask you if you were still mad but never ended up doing so.

The look you were giving him was telling him the answer is definitely yes, you’re still mad.

“I’m going out tomorrow to get some different clothes for my heel era so Ill give this back to you after we’re done tonight.”

“Alright.” He nodded, watching as you pull the hoodie off and hold it up to see it better. Clearly it was going to swallow you whole.

“This might as well be a baggy dress on me.” You pointed out as you held it against your body, showing that it falls nearly to your knees. He noticed the same thing.

“You can cut it if you need to.” He shrugged. “To make it fit decently.”

Your brows knitted together as you looked back up at him. “If I’m giving it back why would I cut it?”

He shrugged again, looking down at the large hoodie covering you whole.

“You can keep it. I don’t really care. Might need to match again sometime later.”

For some reason he was being nice and it was strange to you. You’d chalked it up to the fact that he feels guilty for lying to you. As he should. You tossed the hoodie back over your shoulder.

“I’ll deal with it. You can have it back later.” You say before you brush past him and head down to catering to meet up with Skye.

“What happened?” She asked when you took a seat. Her eyes adverted to your shoulder. “Is that his hoodie he was just wearing?!” You could see the thoughts rolling around in her mind and quickly shut them down. You slung the hoodie down on the table.

“No, not the one he was just wearing, Skye. Just one of them.”

“You’re wearing his clothes? What did I miss in the last five minutes?”

“Nothing.” You shake your head. “He texted me a few days ago telling me I needed to wear black so we could match and I told him I didn’t have anything. So he brought me his hoodie. I’m giving it back right after our interference and getting some new clothes tomorrow.”

She held a weird grin on her face before she looked down at her phone. “Mmkay.” She chuckled.

“What?” You peered your eyes at her.

“Nothing it’s just- it’s funny.” She shrugged.

“What is?”

“The fact that you pretend to be so annoyed by him but you’re willingly going to wear his hoodie.” She pointed at the clothing on the table. “It’s funny.”

“I don’t pretend to be so annoyed by him. He actually does annoy me. I tried to be his friend but he’s so hot and cold all the time. He will be a decent person one minute and an asshole the next, it’s exhausting.” You rambled, making sure she got the point but judging by the smirk on her face, she didn’t buy it.

“Right.” She nodded. “Well it’s almost nine. You should be meeting up with lover boy for your interference in a few minutes.” She teased, earning another roll of your eyes as you stood up from the table with a huff. “Don’t forget his hoodie.” She said before you snatched it up and headed out of catering.

He wasn’t there when you got to the gorilla but you knew he’d show soon. The directors were standing by, seemingly waiting for Hook so they could send you both out at the right time.

You took that time to toss the hoodie on, and it did nothing at all for your figure. It was far baggier than you expected, so much that the sleeves swallowed your hands.

You heard footsteps behind you tracking fast and turned to face the man in question. He took one look at you and his lips turned up in a smirk he was clearly trying to hide.

“This thing is huge on me.” You deadpan.

“I told you to cut it.” He reminds you. Then he reaches down to the ends of the sleeves and rolls them up so your hands are exposed. “Can’t fight if you don’t have fists.”

You stared at him while he rolled the other sleeve up. When your hands were exposed you pulled your hair out of the hood and did your best to make yourself decent before the music hit. As much as you could given the circumstances, at least.

Tyler held his gaze on you for a moment longer before he tore it away the moment your eyes connected, looking down at the floor and fluffing his hair. For once, you matched. You’d noticed his gold cross pendant he was wearing and remembered the one you had on yourself.

“Funny.” You said dryly. “I have one too.”

You pulled the necklace out from under the hoodie and laid it against your chest. He looked down and nodded. “I noticed.” He said, just as your music hit.

You turned around and got ready for your first appearance leading up to a heel turn. You didn’t want to psych yourself out about it, but you felt a little nervous.

“Never thought I’d be coming out to this type of song.” He commented from behind you.

“It’ll be changing soon, evidently.” You muttered before heading down the tunnel.

Anna was staring at the stage when you and Hook came through the tunnel. He threw on his best scowl and it made it a little easier for you to mimick him. Jack came racing up the ramp, hook moving you to the side before he lunged towards Perry.

He snatched the belt clean from jacks hands and tossed it over to you. The crowd went completely and utterly insane as the boys backed down the ramp, throwing punches everywhere they could visibly see of each other’s bodies.

You raced towards the ring as anna was sliding out of it, calling jacks name over and over in an attempt to get him away from hook, and as soon as she had noticed you getting close, she turned around and you slammed the title into the side of her head like she’d done to you weeks prior.

She fell to the floor and Jack immediately rushed to her aid, screaming and cursing you and Hook as you held up the title and shouted back, “This is gonna be his. You just wait! It was always his!”

A proud smirk from hook was caught on camera but you didn’t get to see it. He knew that there were no lines to this. You just came up with something and the fast thinking was what really got him.

Jack then got up to his feet and raced towards you both, but hook stepped in front of you and held his arm out, blocking Perry from getting any closer.

On commentary, everyone was eating the whole situation up.

“Looks like the coldhearted handsome devil has made quite an impact on Y/N!” Excalibur shouted through his headpiece. “This is wild!”

“That it is my friend. I said it from the start. Those two are an absolute force to be reckoned with. God help jack and Anna. Wouldn’t wanna be those clowns right now.” Taz chuckled.

You and hook walked back up to the stage and just before you were about to head through the face tunnel, he grabbed your wrist and nodded his head to the left.

You looked up at him, realizing it was happening this soon. You heard the commotion from thousands around the second you let him lead you through to the heel side, in your mind, you made it official. You were no longer the babyface you’d been for over a year. The transition was starting faster than you’d expected but, it felt a tad bit easier to have someone doing it with you.

“That’s not a shock to me. I could see that coming with those two. Bonnie and Clyde of AEW.” tony announced from commentary.

“Y/N and Hook have made their impression here tonight, and they’re just getting started boys.”

You couldn’t deny that you had an adrenaline rush running ramped. He turned around to let you catch up to him before you entered the hallway.

“How’d it feel?” He asked.

At that moment you almost felt thankful to him for pitching the heel turn idea to Tony in the first place but then you remembered how he kept it from you for weeks. Either way you were able to not let that bother you for the time being.

“Kind of exhilarating. Did you hear that crowd?” You say as you round the corner. There’s looks being sent your way from multiple talent. In your mind it’s judgement but in all actuality they’re wondering how long you and Hook have been hooking up on the low.

“Yeah, they loved it.” He says. He walked a little slower than usual. Usually he was ready to get to the shower but he didn’t mind talking to you a little before that today. He wouldn’t tell you that though.

“I didn’t expect it.” You say. Just then someone calls your name. You turn around and find that it’s Ricky. He reaches his hand out to dap hook up but his eyes stay on you.

“That was fucking crazy what you did out there.” He tells you, making a grin spread across your lips. “I never expected you to turn heel, especially not with my man Hook.” He throws his arm around hooks shoulders, and he stiffens them immediately.

“Next time you’re on I need a heads up so I can watch in the viewing room. Both of you.” He looks at Hook who suddenly has a stiff jaw. He picked up on a vibe Ricky was emitting and he didn’t like it. He didn’t know why but he wanted to get you away from him.

“Thanks Ricky.” You smiled before he nodded his head and gave Hook a pat on his back. “Good choice man.”

You didn’t miss the way hooks eyes followed him all the way down the hall. He suddenly looked like he reverted right back to the version of him you had an unfortunate encounter with weeks ago.

“You okay?” You asked, but he didn’t look at you until Ricky was out of his sights. Then he turned back started walking. You followed close behind, reaching for his arm when you realize you were being ignored.

“Hey” you stopped him. He turned to face you but kept his head down, staring at the floor. “Why do you suddenly look so mad? What just happened?”

“I’m not.” He picked his head up. You could see it on his face. It was clear as day whether he wanted it to be or not.

“You are though.” You attested. “Did he do something to you? I thought you were friends.”

“Can you drop it?” He quickly cut in with a sharp tone. You took a step back, almost feeling like his words forcefully pushed you away. He noticed the distance you put in and his eyes seemed to have softened, but only for a mere second.

He turned back towards the hall and muttered, “see you next week, Y/N.” Before, once again, he left you there watching him go.

———-

“Clearly jealous.” Willow nods dramatically.

“Obviously.” Skye agrees.

“That’s hard for me to believe.” You tell them as you adjust your ring gear. You had a segment to shoot tonight in the ring. It was going to be the first time you actually talked in front of the crowd and you were beyond anxious about it. Tyler was going to be in the ring with you but he wasn’t going to say anything and the fact that you hadn’t spoken to him since that last conversation made you even more nervous.

“Because he wants you.” Willow smirked. “And if you haven’t already heard, everyone is talking about it.”

“Who’s everyone?” You asked as you strapped the laces on your new shoes. It was going to be a little difficult to break in another pair but you assumed that was the price you pay when you turn heel and can’t wear bright, glorious colors anymore.

That was the whole reason you donned an all black attire tonight. Black nails to match. It was never something you expected to wear but if you were going to be a heel you were going to rock it.

“Everyone as in everyone in this building right now.” Willow says. “People keep wondering how long you’ve been secretly hooking up under everyone’s nose.”

“But we’re not.”

“Not yet.” Skye points. “I give it two more weeks and you’re going to send us a picture from his room.”

“I give it one and a half.”

You rolled your eyes and stood up from the bench. “It’s not gonna happen. It’s nothing like that.”

“Then why did he suddenly get all weird when Ricky came up to you?” Willow raised her brows. “Skye, please tell me, why would a man do that?”

“Because he’s jealous. Because he wants you.” She answered, and you shook your head back.

“Whatever. I have to go. I have a segment in the ring in about ten minutes.”

“Good luck. We’ll be watching from the viewing room.” Willow calls out as you head through the door.

To your surprise, Tyler was already waiting for you when you reached the gorilla. To his surprise, you looked like a certified heel. The new attire and dark makeup, it looked way too natural on you.

He had on that signature black hoodie which reminded you of the one you had laying across your bed that you forgot to give back to him.

“Shit, I forgot I still have your hoodie.” You blurted, watching his dark eyes linger down to your attire before they made their way back to your face.

“Told you to keep it.” He said. It was clear he was in another one of his moods again tonight. It was really starting to bother you how he switches so fast, but right now the last thing you needed was to get in an argument and forget your lines. This time you knew you had them memorized thanks to staying up until three am studying them.

“I’ll give it back next time I see you.” You mumbled before music started playing and a song he recognized, but not as your own reached his ears.

“You changed the music?” He asked as he stepped to the side to let you lead.

“I’m a heel now, remember?”

You slid past him and made your way out. It was strange knowing you could no longer interact with the fans. Usually you’d blow a kiss or tag their hands but now you practically ignored them. At least they were engaged and supportive of this new you, so it seemed. Or maybe they were just going crazy over the two of you. Either way, you weren’t the ones getting boo’d.

You plastered a scowling look on your face and tried to keep it there as you made your way to the ring. Hook followed closely behind you, trying not to bob his head to your music.

You slid under the ropes and he took the steps, but you both met back in the middle. You took a minute to take in the reactions from the crowd. It was something you had to try hard not to smile about. Which was going to take some work.

Tony Schiavone handed you a mic and you snatched it from his hand, all for the dramatics, of course.

“Ladies and gentlemen, if you haven’t already noticed, you’re looking at two of the absolute best AEW has ever had to offer you.” You pointed at Hook who nodded his head, stepping side to side on his feet.

You weren’t being boo’d, which came as a thrill to you. If they were eating it up you just wanted to give them more.

“When Anna Jay and Jack Perry made the unfortunate decision to target us, we made the decision to fight back, and what you saw last week when I knocked that bitch out with Hook’s FTW title-“ you paused to make sure the fans were taking it all in, “It was just the beginning.”

You looked over at Hook who continued to nod, chewing on a piece of gum as his eyes scanned the crowd.

“And when Anna recovers from that blow to the head she took from me, I’ll be waiting. And as for Jack, well” you chuckled darkly as you nodded towards your partner, “Let’s just say Hook was some fun things planned for him.”

He looked over at you, and you could see a faint smile on his face before he ran his hand over his lips.

“You see, I realized something a little while ago. You know, after Anna smashed the FTW title into my head?” You reminded the crowd of weeks ago.

“It’s that being nice gets you used and abused. All the times I’ve let that bitch get away with attacking me, I regret it. I really do, but it’s alright, because it will never happen again.”

The crowd popped when you took a pause, but you had to keep that cold expression on your face.

“So Anna Jay, Jungleboy, if you’re watching from the hospital, I just want to say, get well soon. Please.” The camera panned on you and you shot a mischievous grin before you dropped the mic and heard the crowd scream their lungs out.

Your music hit and Hook walked over to the ropes, holding one up for you to slip through.

You headed towards the stage, trying not to let a smile break out. You felt his arm brush yours as he walked alongside you.

When you disappeared through the tunnel you huffed out a deep breath. “Fuck that was exciting.” You chuckled as you placed your hand over your racing heart.

“Fun isn’t it?” He asked as he squeezed into the space next to you.

“Yeah, really fun.” You said before rounding the corner to find Skye standing there. Her match was next but you’d forgotten that in the mix of everything. Her eyes lingered to the man next to you before they fell to you with a smirk plastering her face.

“That was hot.” She remarked as she walked up to you. Tyler stopped when you did, to your surprise and Skye’s.

“You think it was good?” You asked.

“It was perfect. You are doing the damn thing, isn’t she hook?”

You could see what she was doing and tried to send her a look but her eyes were on him instead.

“Yeah, she did real good.” He nodded. That’s when she looked at you again and caught the look you sent.

“You two are a good duo. Can’t wait to see what comes next.” She ran her hand over your arm before she brushed past you.

Tyler looked back down at you and you hoped he didn’t pick up on Skye’s insinuations. He did, but he didn’t mention it.

He started walking when you did, and again, you saw all the people around with their eyes on the two of you. You wondered if Skye and Willow were right. Did everyone think you and Tyler were hooking up? And if so, why? You didn’t think you gave that impression at all. It was just acting, like Tyler told you.

Truth is that Tyler had been approached quite a few times, being asked about you more often than not. He never gave anyone a straight answer, which obviously left them to make their own assumptions.

“Everyone keeps staring.” You whispered.

“They’ll do that.” He muttered back.

You were heading towards the locker room when Jeff Hardy came around a corner, a smile brought to his and Hook’s face when they saw each other.

“What’s up man.” Jeff greeted, “And ma’am.”

“What’s up” hook nodded.

Jeff’s eyes adverted between the two of you, then landed back on Hook. “When are we gonna see this duo beat some ass?” He asked, “I’m ready for it.”

“Whenever Tony calls the shot.” Hook shrugged. “I’m ready too. I think we both are.” He glanced at you. Jeff brought a full fledged smile to Hook’s face pretty easily. One you hadn’t seen from him in all the weeks you’d been around him.

“It’s highly anticipated. From a lot of people, actually.” Jeff chuckles and hook drops his head, seeming to try to hide that smile that you evidently caught.

“We can tell.” He says.

Jeff’s eyes switch back to you again before he looks back at Hook. Both men were grinning from ear to ear as if they had some sort of secret telepathy going on.

“Alright well I’ll see you around brother, and you maam.” He nodded his head and you nodded back.

“Alright bro.” Hook said before Jeff walked around the two of you.

“Best friend?” You teased, watching as he brought his hand to his mouth, physically wiping away that smile.

“Something like that, yeah.” He said as the two of you made your way towards your respected rooms.

“Kind of cool how everyone likes our heel turn. I thought we’d get hate for it.”

“We still might, but it’ll be alright.” He shrugged. You reached the end of the hall that branches off into two opposing directions and it hit you that this was the first time he hadn’t left you standing in the middle of it.

He stopped and turned to face you, adjusting the collar of his hoodie.

“You did good out there.” He tells you, surprisingly. “You should think so too.”

You were somewhat dumbfounded at the fact that he actually complimented you without underlying sarcasm. You smiled even though you didn’t mean to, assuming your lips had a mind of their own.

“Thanks.” You say as you suddenly feel the air getting thick, but not as suffocating as usual.

Hook nodded before his eyes adverted to the empty hall behind you. He didn’t have anywhere to really be, but he told you he did.

“I’m gonna go shower.” He lied for no reason. You just nodded. You felt your hands clamming up, sweat spreading across your palms and didn’t like it.

“Alright well, see you next week?” You didn’t know why you asked. Of course you’d see him next week. It’s been like that for a while now.

“Yeah.” He nodded before he brushed past you, heading one way while you headed the other.

————

A text from Tony at eleven in the morning got your attention that following Saturday.

“This is it. Big match Wednesday.” Was all it said.

It felt like you’d anticipated this whole thing for so long and now that it was coming you weren’t sure how to feel. You stared down at the message until another one came through, but not on the group chat.

“you ready?” He asked, clearly referring to Tony’s previous message.

“No lol” you replied back, but you were being honest.

“you’re ready” he quickly responded, and all you did was stare at those words for a minute to long.

Why it was making you nervous, you weren’t sure. Probably because it was your biggest match to date and held a lot of value to your current heel run but, what happens next? What happens when you and Hook beat Jack and Anna? Is there even going to be a you and Hook anymore?

Lots of questions were left unanswered because you were too hesitant to ask them. You just decided to play it by ear, but the thought of a heel run all on your own wasn’t very appealing to you. As much as you didn’t want to admit it, having Hook alongside you, sort of paving the way for all your antics made things less worrisome and a lot more fun for you.

You truly couldn’t picture doing it without him and that alone was something you never expected.

Another text came through and you were surprised to find that it was Skye. She sent you the picture from AEW’s instagram account when they announced the tagteam match on Wednesday.

“This is your biggest match yet girl. I’m so proud of you. You’re gonna kill it!”

You smiled down at your phone and typed a couple hearts back. The support you had made things a little easier but your nerves were still trying to get the best of you, and you assumed it was going to be that way until the match was over.

————

It was anticipated and highly talked about all over the internet. You were constantly being tagged on twitter, instagram and TikTok. It seemed like the whole world was awaiting this match and the time had finally come.

You were heading towards the gorilla with a racing heart. You kept trying to tell yourself that this was just like any other match, any other opponent but it wasn’t. It was your first match as a heel, first match as a tagteam and longest tv time to date. You had a couple moves you were expected to pull that you never had before and there was very little familiarity around the entire situation.

“Hey” you heard a deep voice from behind you. You turned around to find Ricky standing there.

“Hey” you smiled, adjusting your black wristbands.

“Good luck on your match tonight. Just wanted to say that.” He grinned, and it was then that you picked up on a vibe that you weren’t all that into. You took a small step back but kept your politeness.

“Thanks, I appreciate it.” You say. Before you can turn back, he asks another question. One that catches you off guard.

“Hey, are you and hook like, a thing?”

Your brows knitted together but you wiped that look away quickly. You were about to respond when you felt eyes on you, and just like all the times before, you knew Hook was around.

Ricky’s eyes adverted above your head and that’s when you felt warmth radiating against your back.

“Y/N, you ready?” His deep voice reached you, making your heart flutter for some reason.

He held his eyes on Ricky as you turned around to face him. You could see that familiar expression like before. Jaw set and teeth clenched. It was then that you realized Skye and Willow were right. Hook was jealous. He didn’t get that way at all when Jeff approached the two of you. It was just Ricky.

You spared the man a glance over your shoulder and caught the disappointment on his face, but you couldn’t take enough time to think about it when you had a match in a few minutes.

“What was he talking to you about?” Hook muttered next to you.

You felt a little nervous to say it, but when his eyes landed on you, it urged you to tell him.

“He wished me luck on the match and… he asked if we were a thing.”

His jaw throbbed and you caught it, but by the time that happened you were already reaching the gorilla.

What you didn’t know was that Ricky had been coming up to him asking the same thing, and at one point he expressed that he wanted to ask you to go out with him. He thought he made it clear when he glared the man down but evidently he didn’t make it clear enough. Either that or Ricky just didn’t care, which was what Hook was now figuring on.

He knew he couldn’t get distracted. A lot was riding on this match for you and he didn’t want to ruin that. He pushed the thoughts out of his head and turned to face you instead.

“Ready?” He asked, but he could tell that you were anxious. You still had those wide, round eyes that reminded him of a puppy and as much as you might be good at playing a heel, you just weren’t that person on the inside.

“Ready as I can be.” You nodded, attempting to collect yourself.

Jack’s music was almost finished and you knew that meant it was time for you and Hook to come out. You took in a deep breath and he noticed that it was shaky.

“Something that helps me when I feel under pressure is thinking about the look on the faces of all the people who ever doubted me when they have to watch me prove them wrong.” He blurted, shrugging a shoulder.

You thought on that. Remembering back when you first came to AEW and had no foothold in the industry. All the mean, offensive things you’d heard about yourself start replaying over and over again in your mind and to your surprise, you felt a little bit of adrenaline surge.

“That’s helpful, actually” you tell him, noticing the right side of his mouth tipping upwards.

Just then, the intro of Chairman’s Intent boomed through the speakers and Hook nodded. “Remember that if you get nervous.”

You nodded back before he stepped to the side, as he usually did, to let you lead the way.

You headed out with him trailing right behind you and held your eyes on both Anna and Jack standing in the ring, amping each other up.

The glares being shared between the four of you was making for great tensions arising in the arena and the crowd was intensely engaged in all of it, which made you happy, of course, but you couldn’t show that.

You headed in one direction and he headed in the other, you both circling the ring with eyes on your opponents.

When you passed each other, he held his hand out. You tagged it as you walked past and that simple interaction had the crowd bursting with cheers.

You met up at the steel steps and he stepped back, waving you to go first. You stepped up onto the canvas and slipped between the ropes, Hook following. He didn’t lean against the turnbuckles like he usually did but you assumed that was because this wasn’t one of his typical matches. He stayed at your side and shot daggers to jack and Anna.

You and Anna were going first. You walked up to her, showing no signs of intimidation as you stood toe to toe. She smirked down at you before forcefully pushing you a foot back, making you stumble before you caught your footing.

You wiped that grin off of her face when you delivered a harsh slap to her cheek and from that point on, the two of you were rolling around the ring, throwing fists and kneeing ribs until Paul said it was enough.

You put some separation between you two and that’s when she tagged Jack, so you went to your corner where hook was waiting with an extended hand, eyeing you as you approached.

“You good?”

“I’m good” you slapped his hand and he hopped over the top rope, lunging towards back with a force that knocked him off his feet.

The crowd went wild at his explosiveness and the energy in the arena was absolutely riveting. It could’ve given you a high at that point.

You watched as Hook clotheslined jack right over the ropes, and when he hit the floor, Anna hopped off of the canvas. Hook jumped down and grabbed jack by his hair, but that’s when Anna came behind him and jabbed her elbow into the side of his neck, bringing him down to his knees.

You hopped down and raced over, grabbing her from behind and spinning her until she slammed into the barricades. Hook watched for a moment before he returned his attention to jack.

The two of them were back in the ring while you and Anna threw punches on the outside.

She was way more aggressive than you were, making you feel the urge to hit a little harder. You heard Hook shouting and you both looked up, finding that Jack had used Hook’s redrum against him, but Hook was trying to fight it, and failing.

You kicked Anna back and created enough space to slide under the ropes and break the hold. Hook fell to his knees and jack rose to his feet, walking you back towards the turnbuckles before you felt annas hands around your ankles and your face crashed into the canvas.

You lifted your head to see blood stains dripping from your mouth. Your tongue slid over your teeth to see if one was broken but all you tasted was metallic.

You glanced up to see Hook’s eyes on you. He was in the middle of getting jack ready for a German Suplex when he got distracted by the blood pouring from your busted lip.

He snapped back into it and slung jack over, then got back to his feet like he didn’t take a harsh landing himself and walked over to you.

Kneeling down, he scanned every inch of your face. This wasn’t planned and you both knew that. There was concern in his eyes that quickly turned into undoubted rage when jack grabbed Hook’s shoulders from behind and slammed him down to the canvas.

It was only then that he realized you were bleeding but by that time, it was too late for him.

Hook rose up quickly and threw his fists into jacks jaw. He stumbled back, falling against the turnbuckles and hook just didn’t stop.

Paul had to separate the two, and you when he did, Jack shouted out, “I didn’t know she was bleeding man!”

You got back up and saw the look on Anna’s face when she noticed all the blood leaving a trail from your lip to your chin. She didn’t mean it, and you weren’t mad. Accidents happened all the time, it’s a part of the business.

Hook’s eyes followed you as you walked around the ring back over to your corner, and tensions seemed to have died down when he saw that you were okay.

You held your hand out for him, knowing you and Anna were the ones finishing the match and he hesitated a little bit before he tagged you in.

“You alright?” He asked, and you nodded before you hopped over the top rope.

Anna lunged foward and you stepped to the side, letting her slam into the turnbuckle. Hook smirked at this, it was a classic move.

You grabbed her by the back of her head and slammed her down on her back, watching as she clutched her neck and rolled around, before you pulled her back up.

You knew what was next and had to remember what Hook said that night that you learned you’d be using his finisher to end this match.

Anna was a good bit taller but since you brought a six foot man to his knees, you knew size wasn’t an obstacle.

She turned her back in an attempt to create some distance and you quickly sprung forward and hopped on her. Jack immediately slid under the ropes but that’s when hook raced in and wrapped his arm under his jaw, immediately making him wobbly at the knees.

“Lock it in!” Hook shouted at you as he hopped up and wrapped his legs around jacks waist, effectively bringing him down to the canvas.

You dug your knees into Anna’s sides and reared back, holding on tight when your back hit the canvas and within only seconds, they both tapped out and Hook’s music bursted through the arena, though it wasn’t too easy to hear over the eruption of the crowd.

You kicked Anna’s limp body off of you and looked up to see Hook’s extended hand. You took it, helping you to your feet before he held both your hands in the air.

His eyes would’ve been scanning the arena but they were focused on the blood smearing your skin instead. He nodded towards the tunnels and you lead the way, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand, and feeling the sting of an open wound.

“That was a hell of a match right there boys” taz exclaimed from commentary.

“That it was, taz, those two know how to bring the energy to an arena” tony chipped in.

“I’ll tell you what, I wasn’t too thrilled about the new attitude from Y/N at first, but she’s toughened up a lot since her and Hook teamed up.” Excalibur adds.

“He’s coldhearted and she’s following in his footsteps I guess” tony chuckled

“No, I’ll tell you this much. I’ve had many, many conversations with the coldhearted handsome devil and with Y/N myself and those two simply have like minds, like-personalities and like-spirits. We should’ve seen this one coming boys, it was bound to happen.”

As soon as the arena was behind you, you felt his hand on your shoulder, turning you to face him. His eyes were trained on the laceration but you quickly covered it with your hand.

“It’s fine” you tell him. You wanted to continue feeling the rush that the big win gave you, wondering why he didn’t seem excited at all.

“I don’t care about the cut, I’m too pumped up right now” you tell him as you head through the tunnel with a little pep in your step.

“It’s deep.” He says as he catches up. “I think you should go make sure you don’t need stitches”

“It’s just a cut, it’s fine Tyler.”

Accidentally once again, you said his real name. Once again, he felt a little taken back by it, but tried not to show it.

“It’s bleeding a lot.” He keeps on, like it hasn’t stopped at all.

You wiped the blood with the back of your hand and he grabbed your wrist to show you the crimson covering your skin. “That is a lot.”

“I’ve had worse, seriously. I’ll just go wash my face and hold a gauze to it for a couple minutes and it’ll stop.”

Before he could object again, Skye and Willow were both racing up to you. Their arms engulfed you and you felt the giddiness arising within you again. You glanced over at Tyler who was watching the whole group hug with an evident, proud looking smile.

“You are the baddest fucking bitch” Skye says when they unwrap their arms. “That shit was so good I would watch it a hundred times!”

You couldn’t contain the smile breaking out, and that’s when Willow asks, “Does your mouth hurt? That was a nasty fall.”

“Yeah but she got up and kept fighting cause she’s a bad fucking bitch” Skye grins.

“It’s fine, I don’t even feel it I’m too happy right now” you say as you glance back over to see that Tyler was no longer there. Your eyes adverted all around but he had disappeared elsewhere.

“C’mon, we’re gonna get you cleaned up.” Willow grabs your hand and pulls you along. “Oh, and we’re going out tonight to celebrate you.”

————

You stumbled through the hotel doors at one in the morning, wobbly on your feet with willow and Skye by your side. You’d went out to a bar on the north side of town and downed way too many drinks that you could actually remember but you were still on a high from your match that you didn’t even realize how drunk you actually were.

You were all three laughing amongst yourselves about nothing in particular when you caught sight of Taz coming out of the hotel gym.

He had an amused smirk on his face when he approached the three of you.

“Ladies, looks like you had a good time tonight.” He said as he eyed all three of you before focusing on you specifically.

“You took a nasty fall, Y/N, my son was just telling me about how you were too stubborn to get it checked out.” He chucked. That’s when your eyes lingered over to the gym doors.

“Yeah but it’s fine” you slurred. “I was so pumped I didn’t even feel a thing.”

“Be careful about that adrenaline rush, it can sneak up on you sometimes” he said.

“Okay. Is he in there?” You pointed to the gym, stumbling a little bit.

“Tyler? Yeah, he always does his workouts at this ungodly hour.”

When you heard that, that’s all your attention was focused on. You looked over and Skye and Willow who already knew what you were thinking, but they didn’t say anything except, “Well see you tomorrow girl”

Taz eyed you before a smirk came to his face and he shook his head with a low laugh. “Alright, I’m off to my room. Tell my son he needs to stop calling me down to the gym at anytime past midnight and call his tagteam partner from now on instead.”

You nodded, a smile willingly spreading across your lips before you headed towards the gym. You opened the door to find him sitting on the weight bench staring down at his phone, and right as you saw that, your phone buzzed in your pocket.

He looked up at you, brows knitted but with amusement in his eyes.

“That’s weird, I just texted you. Do you teleport now?” He asked, then cringed to himself. That was stupid, why did he say that?

You chuckle nonetheless as you stumbled in, thinking you weren’t noticeably drunk but it was way more obvious than you thought.

“Have fun?” He asked as he watched you head over to the bench across from his and sit down.

“I did” you grinned sheepishly. “It’s been such a good day, actually.”

He nodded back, eyes lingering to the laceration on your bottom lip that was already healing.

“I just ran into your dad” you tell him, swaying side to side.

“Did you?” He smirks, and you wished your vision wasn’t so blurry.

“Yeah, said to tell you stop calling him down here so late and call your tag team partner instead” you hiccuped.

He dropped his head. “Of course he did” he said as he shook it. You watched as he ran his hand through his hair and fluffed it out.

“Hey” you catch his attention.

“Hey” he says back.

“What’s coming next?” You asked the question that’s been running through your mind for a couple of days leading up to the match. “You know, we won tonight. The rivalry doesn’t really have anywhere else to go. So what does that mean for us? Are we done being partners now that we’ve beat them? I mean I know you still have the FTW title to win back, and I can be there ringside for it… if you wanted”

His eyes dropped to your fingers fidgeting over your lap.

“I don’t really know. What do you want to happen?” He asked, knowing already that he has thought about this same exact thing and the idea of the two of you no longer being a duo didn’t sit right with him, but he hadn’t mentioned anything to Tony and Tony hasn’t said anything else either.

“I want things to stay like they are” you admitted with another hiccup. “We have fun, don’t we?”

He had to keep in mind that you were drunk and now probably wasn’t the best time to take anything you said to heart, but it was hard for him not to.

“Yeah, we do.” He nods.

“So let’s call Tony and tell him we’re going to keep doing this heel run together” you pulled out your phone and read the text that was floating on your screen from Tyler earlier.

“can you come to the gym, i want to talk to you about something”

“Wait, what did want to talk about?” You asked. He shifted around and straightened his posture as he rubbed his palms over his sweats.

Before he texted you that, he was having a talk with his dad about you. It wasn’t often that Tyler came to him for advice on women but he didn’t really know who else he could trust.

He admitted that even though he tried to fight against it, he’d fallen pretty hard for you and it was starting to eat away at him. He didn’t have the impression that you would feel the same way, even though Taz completely disagreed with him on that.

He told his son that he would bet a million bucks that the feeling was mutual, claiming that a connection like the two of you have is undeniable and if he’s ever listened to anything taz told him, it needed to be that.

“You two remind me of myself and your mother when we were young” he recalls his dad saying. “We were too stubborn to admit we had feelings until we got drunk one night and it all spilled out”

“Tyler?” Your voice broke him out of his own thoughts. “What did you want to talk to me about?”

He never had to have a conversation like this before. He never really wanted anyone for more than just a fun night before. His adams apple bobbed as he swallowed thickly and tried to keep his nerves under control.

“I- uh-“ he rubbed the back of his neck as he inhaled deeply. Letting it all out in a quick huff.

“I been thinking a lot about me and you, and I don’t want to stop what we’ve been doing, but I do want to start doing more” he danced around the confession and you couldn’t quite piece it together.

“Like… how?” You asked, a little lost.

“I want to be with you.” He blurted, feeling his cheeks burn the minute the words flew from his mouth. His eyes scanned your face, studying it, searching for a reaction but you were blank faced and for once he couldn’t read you.

“You want to be with me? Like, be with me?” You were sure you weren’t hearing him right. Maybe everyone else thought you and Tyler were a thing but you never thought it was actually going to be an option.

“Yes, I do” he boldly stated, holding his eyes on you, watching as all the conversations you, Willow and Skye had over the last couple of weeks flashed through your mind and you couldn’t believe they were right the entire time.

“But if you don’t feel the same way, it’s okay, I’ll still do the heel run with you and we can forget I ever said anything.” He lowly muttered, waiting for what felt like an eternity for you to say anything back.

“Or if you’re already into someone else, like Ricky or something-“

“I’m not” you blurted out. “I’m not into anyone else.”

You couldn’t ignore the way your heart was beginning to race and your skin felt like it was engulfed in a million small fires. You stared back at him, your eyes lingering to his lips when his tongue slid over them.

A bunch of feelings you’d suppressed out of sheer denial suddenly came rushing in and it was now impossible to force them back again. All the tensions between the two of you, the anger and the confusion over the last few weeks was quickly diminished by an even stronger feeling of pure anticipation and desire.

The space between the two of you was too much and it was if Tyler had that same thought when he stood up from the weight bench and extended his hand. You took it, and he helped you to your feet.

You were unsure what to do with your hands when he let go but it became easy to find a place for them to rest on his waist when his finger curled beneath your chin, angling your head up, lips would’ve been brushing against each other if you were just a little taller.

His eyes were soft and a sprinkle of hazel appeared against the dark brown, and you realized you never noticed that before now.

He took in every inch of your face with a slow and meaningful gaze before an easy smile spread across his lips and a dimple soon followed.

You felt butterflies erupt in your stomach and spread through your whole body when he leaned in. You rose to you tip toes and your lips met gently, slowly, and tenderly. The way they fit like two pieces of a puzzle, moving in sync and pure harmony had your head spinning.

The taste of mint lingered on your tongue long after his lips were no longer on yours and you didn’t want it to vanish anytime soon.

He looked at you with eyes of adoration, his fingers slipping from your chin and pulling you into his chest. You buried your face into the fabric of his t-shirt, taking in the scent of cologne that you recognized from his hoodie you never gave back to him, and that’s when you remembered it.

“I still have your hoodie.” You chuckled, feeling his chest rise and fall with a low chuckle of his own.

“Keep it. It’s yours. It’s been yours since I gave it to you.”

———-

From that night in the hotel room gym on, you and Tyler were always together at the arena and outside of it. Your heel run was going strong. You were an undefeated tagteam that nobody wanted to step in the ring with.

After two weeks of keeping your love life on the low, he decided he wanted everyone to know. You were walking back from another successful match, standing on the stage when he grabbed your hand and spun you to him, placing a kiss to your lips that made the whole arena erupt in screams and chants of your conjoined names the fans came up with.

“Bet nobody saw that coming” Tony sarcastically remarked from commentary. “AEW’s modern day Bonnie and Clyde”

“Looks like you need to set an extra plate at the table when the holidays roll around, Taz.”

“I’ll gladly do that my friend.” Taz grinned as he watched you and hook exit through the tunnel.

“We’ve never seen the coldhearted handsome devil show any sort of emotion whatsoever… except with her!” Excalibur exclaims.

“Guess he’s not so coldhearted after all” Tony chips in.

“Oh no, he’s coldhearted son, but not towards her. Everyone else including myself gets the cold shoulder from my man, but she’s something special to him.”

Tyler walked you to the locker room and leaned against the wall. A soft smile stays on his face whenever the cameras aren’t around now.

“You looked gorgeous slamming Britt’s head into the canvas.” He taunts, earning a laugh from you.

“Thanks, I didn’t really try” you bantered back.

“Never have to.” He grins as he leans in and brushes his lips against yours before they fully connect.

“Everyone knows now” he says when you pull apart.

“They probably already did. We’ve been caught making out a lot” you remind him, earning that dimple you love so much to appear.

“True. I’m glad we don’t have to hide it anymore. I can officially call you mine.” He grins.

You place another gentle kiss to his lips before you whisper against them, “I’ve been yours this whole time”

[jungkoode]

hii dear kiki <3 i hope your day has been good so far. Im approaching my mid day slump already, sighs. I hope to get some writing done today, wishing you positive vibes🖤🖤 mwah

Cherry berry, sorry for the late response! I know you sent this yesterday! 🍒

Listen. Between my insomnia acting up (Jungkook's emotional unavailability keeps me up at night /j) and trying to convince my sister to watch at least ONE k-drama (she's so stubborn ugh), I've barely had time to breathe (╥﹏╥)

But!!! I managed to edit that steamy FMU January night oneshot and honestly?? Your girl might have outdone herself this time. Like. The TENSION. The SMUT. THE ‘holy fuck this is the best I’ve ever had’. UGHHH.

Also!! I found this super cool way to get proper narration (none of that Siri nonsense) so I might include that too! Imagine hearing the sexual tension in actual human voice (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)

Anyway, I really hope you got some writing done! If not, remember that even thinking about writing counts as writing (that's what I tell myself when I spend 3 hours staring at a blank doc anyway lmao).

Sending you all the positive vibes and caffeinated energy! Hope your mid-day slump wasn't too brutal <3

Love you lots my fruity being! Stay chaotic! (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

[castle-dominion]

c3x17 countdown

Edit: haha I found it! I couldn't find my liveblog while clipping last time but this time I went into my archives for the second half of the episode!

Ok so before the episode starts, I need to talk. I’ve been in my fair share of walk-ins, I’ve read a few stories where people get stuck in freezers, what u need to do is grab a screwdriver or smth & break the cooling mechanism.

Rodeo clown, red herring. We've got to find jamal, they say, & the dramatic irony is we know jamal is here in the freezer. Dead.

Why are they covering him? For their own psychological wellbeing? Castle, do up your coat all the way. Y'all be sure to dance sometimes. Don't waste all your energy tho. Now trucks can probably get to -20f or -25c but more likely are set at 0f or -18c like most freezers. Like girl, it is definitely well below freezing. Girl lay on your back & kick with your feet, don't dislocate your shoulder. Plus, you definitely have more than a few hours. Like you would probably get frostbite within half an hour but it is also not a windy place. The real killers are wetness & ventilation. Even if the cooling mechanism is still going, if you kill the fan you would be fine. Just don't sweat too much. Move enough to keep your body temp up, don't move so much that you would sweat. Ok that is bad counting. Count better.

Oh no they r home. lmao circus accidents martha what Grinch changing scene. Yes ew.

Ricochet? Ok I thought y'all shot thru the tin box earlier. Now here: SHOOT THE DANG COOLING MECHANISMS OR BUST EM WITH THE BUTT OF YOUR GUN. Keep moving babes. At least beckett can cover her ears.

Interesting interactions here. You sound like fallon & maybe castle was right. Really really interesting characterization. Is it alexis/martha? Ok but what are their faces, they are just staring at each other & looking more & more intensely

Yeah. I had a radiation interest at some point. Super scary. YOU WEREN'T LOOKING FOR THE TARGET ALREADY??? KR, with his face the way it is: Sir, can I speak with you alone? *glances awkwardly at fallon* But ofc comes with esposito lol Lmao my first thought when they mentioned their history was not what I mentioned last episode (they did the off-grid police work recently) but actually kissing. They haven't kissed yet. Ryan & esposito are so cute & I'm so glad that alexis called even after trying to go to bed. But then again, she called ryan's cell. That's... idk what that is.

Ok put your exposed skin BACK UNDER YOUR EFFING JACKETS & SHARE YOUR CLOTHES I mean at least you're cuddling BUT BREAK THE DANG FREEZING MECHANISM & MOVE & KEEP YOUR BODY TEMP UP. The scariest part for me is the fog at the bottom. THE FIRST ALWAYS Girl it hasn't even been that long & this place shouldn't be able to get that cold y'all are fine, stop being babies. I thought new yorkers complained about the weather! Come up to canada, meet my inuit friends!

The intro is blue <3

Castle's eyes are so good in this lighting. tbh I think the frost on his cheeks is weird. Eyelashes & eyebrows yes. Cheeks? not so sure. Are those our guys or are they the killers? Wait, man's holding a gun

Yucky sound! Bro they should be fine it wasn't that bad. Motorcycleboy! Also while he has at least had one hour of sleep he still needs to go to bed. Same to ryan & esposito & well,, everyone. Alexis called <3 (oh btw what happened to karpowski? I saw her in s2 but never in s3.) K but wdym "until josh called"? We figured you were with beckett until josh called. Then we went back to thinking you were with beckett. edit: they figured he was WITH beckett ;) bc she was struggling with Josh but then josh called & they remembered that she was with josh & she is actually doing well with josh bc he came home for her; & that's why rick & josh exchange those looks. Then they figured he was with beckett as in doing smth incredibly stupid against orders. Oh & costume update: Ryan has another coat. Again, it is nice, but it is also chill, & it is the third jacket I've seen him wear this day! & Esposito has that nice coat I've seen him in before, the one with the shoulder buckles. What patrol units were available bro??? RC: I'm glad my stupidity is predictable Their little handshake <3 RC: You pulled us out of there? (KR nods) RC, probably not thinking about how he was found snugled up with beckett: thanks Beckett was standing there watching him. Apparently castle was more tired than her (even tho she should have frozen more than him) so she was up in a blankett watching him while he was still waking up. Even tho she fell asleep first. Maybe she woke up first because she fell asleep first. Then again, she wasn't standing there in the first shot when he was sitting up. Also just realized, esposito & ryan probably had this exact convo with beckett. That's the kind of deleted scene I want to see.

Oh no it is not even white anymore. So 13 hours at the start, it is now ten hours. They were in the freezer for maybe 2 hours if they've been out for an hour like josh said. Imagine being ryan & esposito, you help each other drag one person out of the freezer, then you drag the second. Then you go back in for that third person under the tarp (which caskett should have been using as a blanket) & whoops it's a dead body.

I'm also assuming they meant 4pm not 4am. Meaning dang it's 6am & nobody has slept! Also meaning alexis called at like 1am or smth. So they found the bomb at 3am actually & alexis might have evenn called that late. Crazy that she would just call ryan (on his cell too) to ask about her dad.

gtg we're watching s4 in my family watch now bai ily

Ok hai I'm back!

KB *politely requests that her & castle be reinstated* MF: Well that's not up to me. It'd be up to your doctor, wouldn't it? Which is so good & so true KB walks off MF: Yk it's funny, when I first met you two I thought you were together. RC: Oh. No, just friends. I watched When Harry Met Sally the day before watching this the first time. *sighs with my hand on my cheek* MF: Get cleaned up. We have a long day ahead of us (which is weird bc castle hasn't been cleared by his doc yet.) Also have they called alexis yet?

Wow it is bright & sunrisey! MR: You look like death warmed over XD <3 Fair has nothing to do with it Rick you might have been able to say "I sent you with grams to that spiritual retreat for a reason. I want you two to go to the hamptons & stay there for the weekend. No questions. Don't try to figure out why. Just listen." or "I just need you two out of the house for a bit"

Yay they've changed. But have they slept? IDK what time it is now. Living this every day is probably why he is the way he is. This is not the time for a special hell reference mom. Except for me. So mum went out with her friends yesterday & Tammy went out to a movie with her son. She had been watching movies at home so much, covid & all, that she would make these huge gasps whenever smth big happened. Her son was sooo embarassed. Mum looked at me & said she could never take me out to a movie. Apparently we took 1.5x the 44min episode to watch it. Ofc lil bro went upstairs to get water & another time to get food but a lot of it was me pausing it to talk (bc it's rude to talk during the movie, well u can talk as long as there is no dialogue). So yeah special hell for those tho talk at the theater.

I wish I could give an esposito outfit update bc he looks cool af but he is backlit. This reminds me of @codex-dominion my other blog. When Tavi (as rufus scippio) was made captain, he had to work a lot. One time he was super overworked & wanted to keep working but his singularé said "no, you need a sleep & a shave" & tavi/scippio said "nah bro I need to do so much I don't have time for that" & his singularé went "no. You never saw the previous captain with stubble. You need to shave & take a crowforsaken nap." Still, I like his gloves! Ah yes, the military. What did I say? Six tours is a lot. Bruh it's the effing military what do you expect?? Why would they choose kevin mcann? Identity theft in the military is surprisingly not uncommon.

You haven't done facial recognition yet? Well ig not bc you thought you knew him MF: I thought this guy was a crime novelist RC: I.. I am MF: Well then you should know *proceeds to explain identity theft lol* KB & JE: :] :]

Gal has a nice mural Pointing with a cig lol VA? They were voice actors together? Or as in veteran affairs or smth? (welcome to indian affairs, which indian would you like to have an affair with?) Support our troops: Bring Them Home. I'm FTM. Oh a trans man? Happy pride. Nonono, I'm nonbinary. I meant Fuck The Military. my post : ) Hey a cell number is good!

This man is a child I love tech geeks from csu or wherever. Old timey phones <3 I remember when canadian troops left afghanistan. I remember it because it was a thing in school. & I remember finally finally it ended in 2021. Let's roll

Casually turns around B'y don't look back. If you must, use a mirror.

Castle is the only sane one here. Yeah like esposito you need a wakeup call. Interesting how he takes beckett in there, not captain montgomery. Tbh I respect his skills. He's cool. Sitting there, quiet, keeping his mouth shut. I can respect that. I might hate it or find it annoying but on a level of skill not ideology it's really cool. Hm, that might be why lockwood & his ones chose to drown ryan instead. If they knew abt esposito & why they couldn't break him. (the cops already know everything about me & your mom) No he won't fallon. The way he talks. It's so true, so good, so calm & thoughtful & angry. Good episode. Becks, idk if holding YOUR gun at him is the best idea. Ok so you're holding him at gunpoint but you haven't even cocked it? I'm assuming it's semi-automatic, you shouldn't cock twice. This military boy would have noticed. Btw the music is slamming. Doesn't even turn on the safety? It took them that long to break down the door or did they only come in after he put it away?

At least fallon is explaining himself. He feels. He knows it will go over better if he does this. But what opening was there my dude? (note: he said he can't break him in three hours. 3h. So what, he had him for 3 hours already or it's 13.00/1pm & he has three hours left?) He is calm & talking to her in his respectful quiet voice even tho she said that to him. Fallon is actually gaining my respect for that. RC: does that guy take jackhole lessons or was he born that way? (heh) KR, who has also changed & hopefully taken a nap, now getting coffee too: Neither. I asked my buddy at DHS abt him. (Cool so we know ryan has a contact at dhs now.) Turns out his wife was killed in 9/11. She rode the second tower down. They were on the phone together when it happened. Man should have started an emo band then, not become this jackhole fellow.

Oh dang fallon's surveillance guy is down! Make ur phone call! Now I have Holy Gail (Hunters & Collecters, Cut) stuck in my head

Ok & now they say less than 2 hours left. That's the next number. It must be 14.00/2pm now or smth. So has it been one hour since the earlier thing or...? I'm still stuck on whether any of them slept. They all seem to have changed (tavi) & they are all drinking coffee, & I'm sure if they didn't go home & sleep that someone took a nap in the morgue or on the couch in the captain's office or in the break room or even on mats up in the gym. A powernap is important if you can't sleep. It at least resets your brain a little bit so you don't feel like you're dreaming. I remember when I was sick one day I either couldn't sleep or chose not to sleep bc it was painful & I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep for hours. I went thru my facebook page back until nov 2020 (it's may 2023 now) to find the day I was talking about. I was awake for 30 hours. "I fell asleep for maybe an hour but I feel like it's tomorrow morning (Thursday) or tomorrow morning but it's actually Wednesday morning which is today. But I also feel like it's 8pm and I have my violin lesson. It doesn't help that the book I'm reading has huge cases of derealization/depersonalization/confusion/etc/etc and I read it righ before falling asleep this afternoon and after I had a miniature bowl of cereal when I woke up. Who am I? What day is it? Did I hallucinate my brother walking around this morning, or was it a legitimate shadow? Have I already taken my meds today? I'm half convinced I'm still dreaming buds" wow yeah that's what it was like. That's probably how they would feel if they haven't slept.

Esposito is wearing that? I didn't realize that when I saw him earlier. Oh no, an explosives ordnance disposal? CRAWL UP THEIR WHERES WITH MICROSCOPES? You're right, they are not brainwashed kids on a student visa, they are brainwashed adults with training. Oh... the syrian consolate guy... Fallon my man! Woah he gained beckett's respect.

Bud that's such a lie. You do what we ask & everybody lives? That's literally the biggest lie bc you are trying to kill everyone!

Fallon, the guy came over for ya, shake his hand & thank him for coming! Should we be giving away our hand like this...? Mike, let the guy talk. Man just didn't do anything when he saw nazihah get abducted?? What he meant by that appointment outside the city was he doesn't believe you can succeed.

Wow they actually shot the guy. Ooh music. So dramatic bestie. our people aren't wearing vests?

If he couldn't get fake-kevin-mcann to talk then how did he get these guys to talk? Oh he lied.

Is that beckett's personal vehicle or? (ew ghost cars)

Work wife. Why would the car turn in front of them? Wouldn't they be taking the same route? Also, wouldn't they already have the sirens on? Make like a stag. (When you're driving, never let a deer that is chasing you get ahead bc as soon as it pulls ahead, it turns, not realizing it still needs to be going forward so as not to get hit. Never let a stag in front of you.) Make like a stag, get right in front of the car. Lol castle getting his face smashed against the window. Ugh finally they did it

Update: I clipped the work wife arguing about driving moment on my new chromebook, the quality might not be any better but at least now it will be easier to tag & upload to tumblr lol

YEAH YOU KNEW THE BOMB WAS THERE, unless it wasn't in which case good on castle for checking BUT YOU SHOULD HAVE ALREADY RADIOED (one lincoln forty again!) & it is 15.58/3.58pm now. (unless the bomb was set to go off around 4pm not exactly 4pm.) It would take two minutes for them to park the helicopter & run in to the bomb. Remember those times both in sherlock & murdoch mysteries where they just stopped the timers? Yeah. Oh & that other time murdoch had to defuse a bomb bc pendrick was claustrophobic. (those two needed to get it on.)

Mk so continuity with timers like this can be hard. I can't tell but I think the show did a good job with this. At least she is calling fallon. My dude. You are not going to get there in time (unless he doesn't know that they only have 1m left bc beckett didn't communicate with him) so pull over the car. What advice do you have fallon? Anything? Tell them to at least look for a "stop/start" button in the hopes that there is one? Wait is he actually the guy who did this is he still driving so he can get out of town bc he planted the bomb? Ooh! Why do the tank & stuff still have the radioactive stickers all over them? I feel like they'd peel em off or smth. (what if some traffic cop pulled her over bc she was driving erratically & then checked her trunk, that would be crazy & possibly a bit of a deus ex machina.) R u 2 finally going to confess ur love 3 seconds left it was probably made poorly or a decoy bomb so it is not going to go off bc the real bomb is somewhere else & they either find it & stop it OR they end up with a crater in new york; a crater that means people are going to be displaced, & without help they have no choice but to turn to crime, & then that escalates future episodes. Possibly even some mistaked DNA stuff, they catch someone & check their dna to what they have in the database but it doesn't match bc of radiation. I think a post apocalyptic crime show would be cool, or at least a post disaster crime show. Wait castle just pulled all the wires out.

Rick just pulled all the wires out. & all at once too. Wow. Well then. I want to laugh but this is so intense. (clipping this too) Right at zero huh. During my family watch All Of Us mimicked castle's triumphant finger point at the bomb. So valid bestie. I mean heck yeah, he had to do smth. Two choices, two endings, but three paths. A: let the bomb kill you. You die. B1: Take out the wires & you die. B2: Take out the wires & you live. You're going to die either way, so might as well take the chance of living. btw why isn't beckett's radiation detector going off?

(all laughing) KB: No you should have seen his face because he stopped, (stopped what?) he looked at me, grabbed all the wires & then he just yanked them! *immitates rick yanking the wires* (her voice is kind of intense) KR: . All of them?? RC: I figured one of them had to be the right one. RM: You know, the mayor wants to give you guys a medal. I didn't have the heart to tell him you had no clue what you were doing. ... JE: Captain's right. You two don't know how lucky you are. RC: *looks at becket* KB: *looking back, seemingly out of breath* RC: Actually, I do. (Do you? I think you do. Just stared death in the face & said "f it, I'm taking a chance!" Tho it is not a risk. You risk blowing up the bomb if you yank the wires but the bomb was going to go anyway so it was not a risk. It was a chance.) RM: Hmm. *as castle & beckett look at each other*

KB: Actually I was doing my job, idk wth he was doing. RC: Hey. But that's true Fallon. I'm so happy that he is explaining. It's his way of apologizing without explicitly apologizing. RC: A codeword. "run" (won't clip but funny) Y'all need some sleep, not beers in the pigstye. Bro I want you to confess your love but josh literally just saved ur asses. Hug her! Hug her goodbye bc you love each other, even if you cannot express that love in the romantic way you want to. Also, say goodbye to all the other ppl around!

Motorcycle boy -w-

Yeah that was good! I enjoyed it.

I can't believe it's already 11.30! I haven't even watched a full episode!

(Girl now imagine it's been weeks of trying to pull s3 clips)

[blazewatergem]

Got around to cleaning up my Switch’s memory, taking off games I’ve completed to games I know I won’t be returning to anytime soon(naughty games are put in timeout void —)

And I found a game I bought but forgot to try out. I even got the big edition with the DLCs: Graveyard Keeper. Y’all, I love it! It’s a bit of a grind game for materials and for getting anywhere, but once you figured out some stuff the rest flows easier. For now at least 😂

The humor’s pretty good too lmao. Our character got isekai’d, hit by the truck and everything I was cackling.

So far ok game! I’d give it like a 7.5/10, only because like I said it is a bit frustrating with low energy and figuring out the time/day system in it. But, still fun, still entertaining.

[perseusjackson-jasongrace]

hey!! i absolutely love your work especially valjercy <3335 is there any way you could write a mini drabble about their valentine’s day?

anon you light of my life, darling of my world! THANK YOU for all your kind words! I’m so so glad you like my messy little pieces of madness (and since you said valjers especially I can’t help but know you like all my insane writing, cause I only write them when I’m out of my mind ha!)

I am now realising you said mini drabble :o I did not read that when I first saw this ask so I hope it won’t take up too much of your mental energy if you decide to read the fic I did write (it’s a little okay a lot more than a drabble), forgive me?

I hope you enjoy! MWAH <3

summary

Percy and Leo are so good at all this control. So good at burning it to the fucking ground. Jason is so good at picking up all those ashes and tossing them to the sky. Why do you think the clouds are always grey? They’re all so good at this. Love. What is love anyway? Power.

(alt sum: they’re all insane and addicted to each other)

beginning notes

hi angels! got an anon request for some valjercy for valentines — thank you for the request loveliest anon — I know I didn’t make it in time for vday but at least it’s here before love month ends entirely ? (please be proud of me I’ve been so busy with uni I haven’t had the chance to write and it’s ruining me)

as usual this is not edited it’s wayyy after midnight here and I need to sleep. every mistake is a hug. if there’s no mistakes (LMAO) I’m giving you a hug anyway!

happy love month y’all!!

title is from: “hugs & loyalty” by twlv, REDDY, IV, owell mood

I recommend listening to that and “closer” by RM, paul blanco and mahalia while reading :) to enhance the vibes

okay I love you guys! MWAH <3 thanks for being my valentine (yes all of you, I’m a spoilt girl)

CW

blood mention // unsettling pace // gory content // sexual content (not real explicit stuff but implied things happening)

[pondslime]

2022 writing wrap up

tagged by my beloved @possumteeths MWAH ILY

Total Words Published: 

30,725

Additional Words Written: 

about 9k of assorted other wips lmao

and about 4k for a random non-fic writing project that I kinda......abandoned......but maybe we’ll pick it back up idk

Grand Total of Words: 

about 44,000!

Fandoms:

house of wax exclusively. smh. bc I lost my mind in october over it and have published nothing BUT content for it

however!! I would love to branch out eventually and write some other shit lmao!!

I have a bride of chucky fic in the works and I’d love to dabble into other slashers PERHAPS

none of them own this ass quite like those wax losers UNFORTUNATELY

Highest Everything (raw kudos, hits, comments):

it’s my first HOW fic, poacher’s dream...which is a categorically nasty and weird lil house of wax oneshot about bo sinclair bein nasty w/beer bottles.

glad to know that all of u are intrigued @ the thought of being debased w/a budweiser bottle by this hick loser bc same tbh

Highest Kudos to Hits Ratio:

pumpkin guts! a silly lil halloween romp in which the reader carves pumpkins with the worst men in america! spooky!

New Things I Tried:

x reader fics lol!! I never thought I'd write anything in that format! tbqh, I didn't think I'd return to writing fanfic at all! bc for years I’ve had this cycle of getting into something, writing one (1) fic for it, losing all interest in fic writing, and disappearing off the face of whatever fandom I scuttled into lmao

seems like the only thing that motivates me to semi-regularly post fics is the concept of screwing the vilest fictional men?? interesting!! I love my neurological functions

Fic I Spent the Most Time On:

it feels like it was sanguine lmao

I wrote 9.5k words of weird cerebral EDGING porn for this deranged elvis impersonator and his mechanic LARP

I really did 

and it’s 100% the least accessible of my fics bc it’s Peculiar™. but when I tell u I sat and absolutely labored over that fic rfhsdjwjfedskrfjwds

I put a lot of time and energy into it and it knocked 7391932 years off my life tbh

Favorite Thing I Wrote:

something borrowed! 

I think it’s the strongest fic in my catalogue tbh. Just pacing/format-wise. I really like the overall structure and tone! It’s this strange little foray into Bo’s demented little pea brain and has several scenes I love a lot 

I’m also very fond of miss ambrose, my lester fic! it’s just GOOFY fluffy nonsense!!! I had SO MUCH fun writing it 

Favorite Thing I Read:

everything LITERALLY EVERTHING that my fuckin INCREDIBLY talented friend @possumteeths​/ @raccoonspooky​ wrote!! like I’m actively trying to narrow down my favorite and I am having the most DIFFICULT time bc they are all works of fuckin art lmao

I literally just reread obedient dogs the other day. go read that. have u read the SOUL SHATTERING and AWARD WINNING they'll pay you a thousand for a kiss & .50 for your soul ?? HAVE U?? BESTIE if U HAVE NOT??? 

basically, go gargle down all of poki’s content idk man IT’S ALL SO GOOD 

@visceravalentines​ wrote THIS incredible piece and it made me clinically fuckin insane. edit: AND THIS ONE. HOLY SHIT. I have reread both of these 7382817983 times!!! meg ily!! u just wait I’m gonna attack ur masterlist like a frenzied bear after a long winter hibernation I swear

regrettably, I didn’t consume a ton of fic this year!! granted, I only got into this fandom in october so I have time to catch up lmao!! definitely plan to have a more extensive list next year 

Writing goals for 2023:

write more nonsensical insanity and just have fun lmao

as for concrete plans!! I’d love to write a whole series of x readers with horror ladies (final girl/villain/what have u)! carly and tiff are already on that list, but if you have any other ideas, I’m all ears! I need to brush through my horror lady mental catalogue and give them some ao3 rights lmao!

New Works:

The previously mentioned Carly x Reader fic! It’s been my super self-indulgent brainchild for the past couple months, and I love it a lot! I really want to hammer it out this month and toss it out into the internet void......but we shall see. 

If only I can get the weevil that is Ho Binclair out of my goddamn scriv doc..........speaking of him.......................

☢️💥🤡 I’ve got 37171984918342 Bo WIP’s bopping around my skull at all times yikes🤡💥☢️

I don’t need those. u don’t need those. I’ve already written enough for this man. what else is there 2 say!!! and yet

I’m also writing bits and pieces of this multi-chaptered Vincent slowburn. that will be out..............................at some time? in the future jfrdsjhrjhwfdskrwfds who knows

tagging the writer moots that I haven't already seen tagged!! no stress of course mwah 

@visceravalentines, @venus-haze​

also consider urself tagged if u read 2 the bottom of this hell post 

[an-absolute-travesty]

hey !! i have like no energy to figure out the og post people are asking you about writing stuff but use this as a freeby question to talk about something in a fic that you would love to talk about forever <333

Lmao that’s ok!!

When I’m writing I have to like… restrain myself from super flowery over-the-top descriptions of characters. ESPECIALLY Biana. Every time Biana is a love interest I have to physically stop myself from comparing her to love goddesses and Greek statues and everything else forever and ever and ever. I could write pages and pages of Sophie crushing on Biana. Why? I don’t know. It also goes vice versa.

I almost never do this for the boys, at least not to nearly the same extent. I don’t know what it is about the keeper girls that makes me want to write fucking poetry about pretty women but they do.

Flowery descriptions and like… references. Usually to classic literature or artists (which I’ve indulged quite heavily in this upcoming fic) but also random stuff from my life that only I would find funny. I do manage to take most of those out in the editing stage, since they just won’t land as jokes for anyone else and stand out like a sore thumb, but the urge to include them is strong.

I don’t know if this is how the question was intended, but I have trouble interpreting things sometimes so this is the best I got. 💀.

[mythiccheroacademia]

Happy New Years Hotties!!!

hey :) i know your dash is flodded with beautiful new year’s posts and i just wanna pop in and add my own little thank you note. if you read nothing else, at least read this.

after the year we just had, you deserve some big gross romantic declaration of love and then a new year’s kiss. so lemme just say i love you and give you a smooch. you survived all 365 days and that’s some real hot girl shit. thank you for being you. i’m shaking some metaphorical ass for you bc you are that bitch

wishing nothing but inner peace, self love, confidence, happiness, big moneyyy and all the pretty bitch shit you could ever want in life <3

now that that’s over, wanna see me be a cornball beneath the line?

i’ve attempted to write this an embarassing amount of times. so now im forced to write this 2 hours before midnight at a church event....wearing white like im not on the most sinful app in my phone...in front of my mother...keeping a straight face in front of 100 people...and this wig is squeezing tf out my head. this is prolly not gonna be perfect and if i forget anything or anyone, my b dawg. i’ll be back to edit

so let’s get into it. no beta, we die like hot girls 

there’s about 5.4k+ of y’all i’d like to individually thank, but that’s impossible in the time constraint i have. so, for now, pls accept this embarrassing thank you/love letter. im not gonna act like i dont spill my heart out to yall on a daily. but imma do it again. this yr was trash tbh. everyone was being tested like all hell, but we’re here and i’m very grateful for that. my heart is full from all the kind hearts i’ve met throughout my time on here. 

~~~

to my mutuals, your presence literally blows my mind bc there was certainly a time i talked to me, myself, and i LMAO. i was so nervous to speak to anyone outside of asks bc a bitch was shy, but you’ve all accepted me with open arms and have made my time on here that more bearable. thanks for tolerating me bc ik i’m a lot sometimes hehe. y’all are cool asf and a large reason why i haven’t called it quits. no matter what i want the best for y’all. thank you, i love you 

also i have to write a special shout out to @bnhainthewoo and @melanimed bc you two hoes are stuck w me forever. even tho ion like yall niggas all the time, i love y’all like sisters. you’ve supported me through some real shit and i cant say thank you enough. i’d literally fight anyone for y’all also @liltodo @cellotonin @kingtamakimurder @tamasoft @kelatonin @mrs-atushiro @itsbabyysunnyy @mypimpademia @myhoodacademia @infernaltribute7 @sheerxradiance (i’m forgetting so many people but my mom just asked why i’m typing so much and im PANICKING) you all are people that i was lowkey highkey geeked to get to know and blogs i look up to. when i figured out you followed me, i smiled a lot and every time i interact with y’all i literally tell myself ‘don’t fuck this up cece.’ it’s sick LMAOOO i appreciate you and idk man, i just genuinely like you guys a lot and ion be liking people like dat. hope y’all are well and know that i have real love for you. i’d revoke my hottie card for y’all <3

~~~

to my anime anons, bitchhhhhh y’all are a RIOT. thee harem house is a mess!!! the way you keep my on my toes is sickening. you guys deserve a medal. you make my tumblr experience so fun, i can’t thank y’all enough. you make me feel all kinds of emotions and i’m always asking myself, “now how’d we end up here?” KSSKSK. please know that i’m grateful for every note and ask. i hope you all are having a wonderful new year. i love youuuuu

~~~

to my followers, if anyone deserves the biggest thank you, it’s y’all. you’re the main reason i write. the comments and interactions i get from you....i dont understand how i got so lucky. you’ve seen some shit on here yet you still stay. like bitch wtf. WHY ARE Y’ALL STILL HERE??? you make me smile and i honest to God wish i could hug you all. thank you for believing in my writing. thank you for believing in me and this blog. and thank you for being some real ass pretty bitches

i had more to say but i’d be here all night. happy new years y’all. be safe and know i care about you. thanks for surviving 2020 with me. y’all are some hot girls fr fr

i’m about to tag everyone and their mama. if i forget you, pls know i dont mean it and I”M COMING BACK. i have to do this in the next 3 min jdknfk;fk i love you. don’t come at me sideways! i beg!!!

@sems-diarie @sunshineszn @pinkceokjin23 @chefakari @black-bhabie-2000 @azura-galaxy @amajikibby @des-the-girl @blkanimegyal  @iiminibattlehero   @lilsparkyswife @stellarxfresh @mintballoons @reebgirl13 @bnha-baddie @vixenpen @oshun-energy @vangooh-works @tediursula @oh-sotired @azura-galaxy @fuckingyaoimann @astrablossom @todorokiaimee @thermaflute @saitamastamaticsoup @velvesagi @blkladyelle @sweetbakugou @shayiswifey @vodrea @bakugoustanaccount @shhhlikeme  @bnhatrashh @niggacaaaaaat @tododeku-or-bust (couldnt forget to add you<3)

[bringingglory]

thank you so much for the tags @hanamuri @fullmetalscullyy @megthemighty @nightofnyx8 @tsaritsa !

How many works do you have on AO3? 11! some are botw, one is tdiapt, some are fma, and some are haikyuu! i mostly just write for whatever im interested in at the moment/whichever fandom inspiration strikes for

What's your total AO3 word count? 101,939

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Keep Your Friends Closer But Your Enemies Closer - T: ahhhh my miraculous ladybug fic! ive literally been working on her for FOREVER and i swear to god im going to finish it, i literally know how i want to end it and i know all the events leading up to it. hell, i even have a vague idea of what i want to happen in the middle, i just need to know what order the middle stuff happens in and also i just have to write it. It's an AU where Ladybug and Chat Noir are actually enemies but then Chat Noir accidentally befriends Marinette and then drama etc etc etc.

rain - G: first zelink fic babey! set Pre-Calamity and basically link and zelda get stuck in a cave because of the rain and there's just a lot of quiet pining, etc etc.

Your Friendly Neighborhood Oikawa - T: HAHAHA this was a crack fic inspired by my roommate but then i forgot it was supposed to be a crack fic while writing it and there are accidentally real emotions alkjdfalksdf but anyway it was very fun to write lmao. it was based off this meme and basically it's an AU where Oikawa is Spider-Man and Iwaizumi doesn't know but they still like hang out and stuff. It's a lot of fun, or at least I think it is, haha.

stolen moments - T: first royai fic!!! just a series of "stolen moments" (mic drop) where roy and riza like cant be together but yknow, they try. lots of pining. etc

a secret weapon of sorts - T: 5+1 edwin fic inspired by the Simple People OVA where instead of ed giving winry earrings to get out of trouble, he gives her kisses.

Do you reply to comments, why or why not? Yes! I try really hard to!!! Sometimes I get overwhelmed and I don't respond to comments for a while, but I absolutely do my best to when I remember because I feel like it's my way of saying "thank you" for them reading my fics in the first place, haha.

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending? Uhhhhh, sleepless I guess? But it's more open-ended/not explicitly positive more than anything, though even then I feel like I've got a hint of hope in there. alkjdfhalsdk idk man I just, I can't write *pure* angst, there's gotta be some light, and thus I could never end anything angstily

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending? LMAO most of my fics??? I guess??? bc despite being an anxious piece of shit, I am an optimist by heart

Do you write crossovers? If so, what's the craziest one you've ever written? When I was younger! Idk, I guess the Rise of the Brave Frozen Tangled Dragons fandom??? if anyone remembers what that is lmao

Have you ever received hate on a fic? Not exactly? Maybe some weird comments on KYFCBYEC but even then, it wasn't that often.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? No no no no no no no no. I am telling you, I physically cannot write smut. I don't think I actually have the capacity. Absolute fucking kudos to every single smut writer out there bc it truly is an art form capturing that intimacy and emotion and etc, but I literally get flustered from writing mildly detailed kiss scenes. If I ever wrote smut, I would burst into flames on the spot.

Actually lies, I technically wrote smut once, but it was at the request of my roommates and they wanted me to write a crack smut fic of Y/N x our uni's mascot and I wrote that thing in like 3 hours with so many silly memes to keep myself sane (not like other girls, tongues battled for dominance, etc), did not edit it, and because it was so, like, not serious, I was actually able to get through it. But even then, when I wrote "thrusting" I literally had to put my laptop down for 20 minutes.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? Nope!

Have you ever had a fic translated? Not yet! Someone commented on Your Friendly Neighborhood Oikawa and asked if they could translate it and I said yes! They haven't gotten around to it yet, but I would love to see it if they do!

Have you ever co-written a fic before? Not yet!

What’s your all-time favourite ship? Bro it changes day to day. You can't ask me this lmao. The current ship I'm most fixated on is Iwaoi, but I wouldn't say they're my all-time favorite.

What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will? I'm not answering this energy. On god, I'm going to finish things. I want to.

What are your writing strengths? uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh very good question lmao. I don't really like thinking about "strengths" in my writing bc who am I to say? akjdslakfjdf idk, instead, I'm just gonna say some things I like/try to do in my writing, which are: conversational prose/having a lot of voice in the narration, I try to add humor wherever I can, and recently I've gotten better and metaphors and describing things bc I picked up writing poetry a year ago!

What are your writing weaknesses? hmmm, a thing I dislike about my writing/the writing process is that I'm slow to publish things and slow to finish things because I'm such a messy first drafter and I also take forever to edit. I would like to uhhhhh get things out faster. Also I tend to repeat myself a lot bc I forget the details of things I write sometimes lmao.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? Hmmm, I dunno, I guess I don't have any strong thoughts? The only other language I know is Mandarin but even then, I suck ass at that, so I'll prolly never write dialogue in another language simply bc I like to try to portray things semi-realistically and I don't think I have a good enough grasp on any other language the same way I do in English to produce authentic enough dialogue.

What was the first fandom you wrote for? Fablehaven I guess? But Idk I was in fourth grade an didn't even know what fandom was yet. Rise of the Guardians, maybe?

What’s your favourite fic you’ve written?

AHHHH idk??? maybe hold your hand out in the dark because i really experimented with my writing on that one and im sort of proud of the result, just like the fact that i wanted to try something new and it turned out alright. that or Sunset Wheeling which is an iwaoi fic where they just skate, and like it's prolly one of the most self-indulgent things i've ever written because it's silly and they just. skate. but aljdfalsjd idk i loved it and i churned it out in 6 days and it was a lot of fun lol

ahhh a bunch of people have been tagged already, so sorry if im tagging you again, but for now im just gonna tag @niconiconina @notkorras @thatisadamnfinecupofcoffee @firewoodfigs and anyone else who wants do it!

[yonqha]

—- 📞

speed dial

the light bulb in your room goes bust, and you needed someone to fix it fast. you had absolutely no clue on how to change a light bulb. but allen ma, your ex-boyfriend, knows how.

allen x reader oneshot (requested) // semi-angst, fluff (?)

word count: 1.9k words

a/n: this was just lightly edited (i got too lazy) lmao so pls excuse any errors >< and :D let me know if y’all want an alternate ending for this i might write and post one soon ^^

masterlist

heavy hands on the keyboard, the smell of coffee suspended in the air, and light illuminating your weary face. this was the current situation as you were busy typing away your report for work. your hours at the office were seemingly not enough for the amount of tasks you needed to do, hence the urge to continue work at home instead of taking your time to rest.

you gave yourself no breaks, wanting to finish this as quickly as possible to stay on track. the only breaks you considered were mini sips of the instant coffee by your side and fast trips to the bathroom. notifications from your phone didn’t bother you at all, you were that driven to finish this report as soon as you could.

but the main light in your room didn’t seem to favor that. after taking a sip from your coffee mug, it flickered a few times and decided to die on you. the room suddenly went dark, minus the light coming from your laptop. this made you groan in frustration. standing up, you went to the light switch just by the door to check. you turned it on and off but to no avail-- it’s a busted light.

a loud sigh came out of your mouth. out of all the things that could happen, your light had to die on you. you thought of just continuing to work without the light, but your eyes were starting to get strained from looking at the screen for hours. this made you regret not buying a desk lamp in the first place.

you had to think of a solution, you didn’t want to stall for too long as you might lose your energy to work. grabbing your phone from the desk, you opened your contacts to try and see if you could call an electrician. but upon seeing the time, you immediately gave up.

there is no way an electrician would go to your place at 2 in the morning.

plus, the time for them to get here? you couldn’t wait that long.

so you decided for plan b: going to wikihow to search how to change a busted light bulb. scrolling through the steps, you just got more and more confused. you don’t even know how to differentiate light bulbs, how on earth are you going to change one by yourself?

so you settled for plan c: finding someone on your contact list that knows how to change a light bulb (and is possibly still awake at this hour). you paced back and forth inside your room, scanning each name in your contacts to find anyone that can help you.

your eyes then fell on a certain name, making your feet halt immediately. does this person know how to change light bulbs? yes. is this person still awake at this hour? you’re definitely sure about that. does this person live relatively close to you? yeah, somewhat.

but are you sure you want to call your ex-boyfriend to help change your broken light bulb? no answer.

you didn’t want to bother him, probably cooped up in his studio busy producing tracks like he always does. but you have no other option, well, unless you want to cite the rest of the alphabet starting from the letter d for other plans.

you took a deep breath. ‘you have a report to finish, y/n. get yourself together.’

you dialled his number and put the phone to your ear. it only took a couple of rings before the male answered. “hey, allen? i need some….help.”

just a few minutes after the call, allen was already by your doorstep ringing the doorbell. you took one quick look at the mirror to fix yourself, thinking you might be a complete mess from doing work, and opened the front door.

your eyes met and you swear you could feel the butterflies enter your stomach. those same pesky butterflies that gave you that fluttering feeling whenever you were with the male. you mentally cursed. you thought you’re already moving on from him, but it seems not. your body can’t lie, what else could be a possible explanation for this? the coffee?

yeah, probably.

“hey, y/n.” allen greeted, giving you a small smile.

“hey.” you replied back. sensing the forming awkward atmosphere, you moved aside to give allen space to enter your unit. it honestly felt weird for you to be letting allen in like this, especially when you’re used to him just entering the unit without your help. after all, this used to be allen’s apartment as well. the both of you lived together in this space you both could call home.

without hesitation, allen headed to the room just by the kitchen. “everything’s still here, right?” he pointed at the door. standing by the kitchen counter, you nodded in reply.

“i never really touched that room, you were the one who took care of it after all.” you commented as allen turned the knob. he opened the door to see that his arrangement of the supplies inside remained as it was. he let out a chuckle. “i can definitely see that.”

after getting the brand new light bulb and a flashlight from the stockroom, the two of you headed over to your bedroom to have the light bulb changed. allen grabbed a spare chair from the room to stand on and proceeded to work. you sat on your office chair, taking a sip of your already cold coffee.

“just an idea but, i think you should be teaching me how to change a light bulb,” you set down your mug. “or any home repairs in general.”

“i’d be willing to offer you lessons,” allen replied as he unscrewed the broken light bulb. “that’d be 5 bucks per lesson. deal? we can start now if you want to.”

you kicked his leg from your seat, and the two of you laughed at the exchange. “i can’t believe you.” you muttered and shook your head.

it was just like how it was before— exchanging jokes, having playful conversations. except, you two broke up. it reminded you of how the two of you first hung out together, enjoying each other’s company through hours of talking and joking around. but that reminder came with the small pang in your heart, another reminder that it is now just a memory living in your head. something you don’t experience as often as before, and something you have to get used to not having.

allen took out the new bulb out of its box, and broke the momentary silence. “so, how have you been?”

it took you quite a while to answer, coming up with something that isn’t about you thinking about your breakup and starting to move on. “i’ve been….well. just busy with work as usual. you?”

“just the same. i’m finishing up an EP, just a few final touches and it’s ready for release.”

hearing that made you smile instantly. allen’s music was your favorite, and hearing that he’ll be releasing new songs soon brightened up your mood. “oh? that’s great! finally, i have something new to listen to.”

“and something new to have on repeat for hours.” allen remarked as he started to screw on the new light bulb. you rolled your eyes at his words and at how he still remembered your habit of leaving songs on repeat.

“okay, done.” allen turned off the flashlight, got off the chair he was standing on and went to turn on the light. the room was illuminated, and that meant you can finally start working again.

“thank you so much, allen. i’ll treat you to a meal for the help.” you stood up from your chair, watching as allen returned the chair to its earlier position.

“no need, y/n. but thank you.” he flashed you a smile and exited the room. you followed shortly behind.

allen went to return the flashlight back in the stockroom. closing the door once he was done, he suddenly searched for something in is pocket. seeing as he couldn’t find it, he faced you and asked for a favor. “can i borrow your phone? i think i left mine in the car. i just have to make a quick call, if it’s alright?”

“oh, sure, it’s in my room.” you replied as you made your way to your room, grabbing your phone from your desk and heading back to allen. you unlocked your phone and handed it over to the male.

as he was busy inputting the number and making the call, you awkwardly looked away and gave him the space to make his call.

soon after, you heard a phone ring beside you. you turned to face allen who just fished out his phone out of his back pocket. the confused look on your face made allen chuckle.

“here, thanks.” he handed back your phone. “i placed my number on speed dial. so if you’re ready for those lessons, or just need some more help in general, just give me a call.”

taking your phone from his hands, you smiled. “thanks, allen. i appreciate it.”

allen paused, gathering his words, and spoke. “i…know you’re trying to move on and maybe you don’t wanna see me,” he started. “and you’re probably still a bit sensitive from the breakup. but i hope you know that i’m still sorry for the way i acted that day.” his eyes met yours, showing how much he means it. “we both weren’t in the right minds to talk, and it led to...this. maybe it’s for the best, but, i wish i could’ve handled my emotions better. and i’m truly sorry for that.”

as if on cue, your brain played the memory of that day. two stressed individuals fighting with each other under the control of raw and ugly emotions. you both decided after that it wasn’t working anymore, and it led to a mutual breakup. it still hurts for you, though. someone you held so dear to your heart suddenly leaving just like that. the two of you didn’t meet ever since that day. well, until your light bulb decided stop working. is this fate doing its work?

“as cliche as it may sound, i hope we can stay friends at least.” allen smiled at you, hoping you would agree to the idea. it hurts for you knowing the most you two can become are friends, but you thought that maybe this is for the best. maybe this is what it should be. and i guess it’s better than losing allen in your life. besides being your partner, he was like a best friend to you. why waste this chance?

“can i still be your best friend?” you asked after a short while, and allen gave a lighthearted laugh.

“that would be great, y/n.”

the thick air between the two of you dissipated, and the heavy feeling in your heart started to fade away. meeting allen one more time was what you needed all this time.

you escorted allen to the door and bid him goodbye. the apartment was now empty again besides your presence, but it felt much more lighter. like the invisible cloud of black smoke around your unit was finally gone.

with a light feeling in your heart, you went back to your room. you headed to your desk, the laptop screen flashing for you to finish the report. after giving it a good stare, you closed it.

you deserve a break. the report could wait.

[nightfayre]

life update(ish)!

so I literally just finished editing/updating all the posted chapters of F&F, meaning that I can finally put my energy into working on the next update. it's been long overdue, I know, but I just really needed to make the current posted content less cringey before I could move on lmao

for now, I'm really gonna try my best to focus only on F&F. the order of my priorities is as follows:

1. fire and the flood

2. shattered chandeliers prequel

3. true north

4. atla AU

5. requests/prompts that have been literally sitting in my inbox for months now, I'm so sorry

6. perhaps opening up commissions...? (would anyone even be interested???)

but... yeah! that's it. who knows how long this list will actually take me, but at least I've got a start!

oh and I'm getting a pet hedgehog soon!! :))) <33333

[seb-owns-these-tatas]

Witcher of the Night (Chapter 22)

THIS IS MODERN ERA READER WHO WOKE UP IN THE DIMENSION OF THE WITCHER.

CHAPTER 21

WOTN MASTERLIST

Characters: Geralt of Rivia x small!Naive!Reader

Summary: Sorceress Ingrith might be going on far more ways to plan your early demise for you and your unborn child without the witcher around. The queen also thinking of plans to punish you without the use of drudging.

Warnings: Derogatory, plans attitude and words. Mention of the Witcher character named ‘Auckes’. 

Words: 5.6k

A/N: I’ve been feeling on and off with my mental state since last month. I just don’t tell anyone. Anyways, Feedbacks will be nice to receive. Thank you. I plan on writing two more last smuts for Witcher of the Night in the future chapters. So, watch out for that. I needed more of my Geralt fixation. LMAO. I’m sorry if my fic  is beginning to be boring for you, but I needed to write this for the sake of the story. I know I’m not the best writer out here. So, I’m sorry for any disappointments. Stay safe, Bb’s.

TAGLIST IS STILL OPEN FOR THIS ONE! Heehee! Don’t forget to REBLOG, COMMENT OR GIVE FEEDBACK IF YOU DID LOVE THIS CHAPTER! IT’LL MAKE ME SMILE! Sorry for the grammatical errors and such because English isn’t my mother tongue! PLEASE LEAVE FEEDBACK AFTER READING, BB! I apologize for errors!

Disclaimer: PNG’s and pictures used in edits are not mine even the GIF’s too. Character development and personalities are based from my understanding and how I want them to be. I only own my original characters in this fanfic. Geralt GIF from the Tumblr account named (B-N-A-O)

MY WORKS ARE NOT NOT NOT NOT NOOOOOOT TO BE POSTED ON ANY OTHER WEBSITES. My official username in Wattpad is “TATATHEPOTATO” and that’s the only other site I have for writing aside from Tumblr. Thank you, Tater tots!

It's been a day of hearing from Eanraig that your witcher has started his journey over the hunt for the lost witch.

Hours have also passed after hearing such devastating and surprising news from the druid about your unexpected 'cursed' pregnancy whose father was a witcher that is expected to actually be infertile. The happenings intentionally given by a genie you only knew and expected to watch and read through fairytales; Disney fairytales.

Sleep was hardly your partner last night. Thoughts coming over the idea of a maddened witcher and your pregnancy, having only minutes of light slumber that has gotten you waking up with every single thud you hear from outside your chambers. Thinking that it was someone who wanted to hurt you again especially that Geralt wasn't around for you to hide from behind.

The early knock received before sunrise has got you scrambling on your feet, latching off the locks of your door for the queen of Kaedwen to emerge from your doorstep with more than a trio of servants following her while she trespassed inside your chambers.

She stood before you in her silk, expensively designed, black night gown. With her head held up high and hair bedazzled before she even decided to pay you a visit in her usual lavish gowns.

"You are quite the woman. Also, your witcher is as well."

Queen Makeda interrogated, gaze raking all over the room to check any evidences of her necklace being thrown around. She huffed to herself when there was no traces of her enchanted, Cobalt amulet that has been stolen by your doppelganger.

"---Demanding for a soft bed for you to sleep on while he hunts for the witch who has cursed my son?"

"Not even my young daughter would approve of this," she spoke in animosity, spitting the words like how she truthfully felt, "---Your horrible kind," the latter continued, taking heedful steps forward as you've stood on your ground; firmly and never backing down.

The queen was undeniably taller than you. She'd peered down, glaring into your narrowed eyes fighting back for her attempt on intimidating you. After everything they've done, feeling scared was running through your veins. It was pumping wrath and distaste for how they've treated you like an animal for pointing fingers over the woman who has stolen her necklace---even asking such favors for Geralt when they knew how he acted towards you; using it to their advantage.

"---You and your witcher. It disgusts me,"

"Look who's talking, guess Geralt is the only way to save your cursed son then? But, you still manage to hate his kind when you're depending over him to save your prince,"

Out of the blue, you've felt fingers clasping around your throat. Her long nails sinking through your skin as her hold was tight, ceasing the air passing through your throat that has gotten you growling beneath her palm.

She intently given you a death look, bequeathing the opportunity of laying a hand on you without the witcher who has never left your side from the moment he arrived.

"Give me back my necklace. It was a gift by the king that I hold dearly,"

The bitch was barking when she had no evidence at all. You mindlessly thought in the back of your head whilst being choked at the same time.

"Your h-highness," you dryly coughed out the air she was trying to cut you off with. You've given her a menacing glare as well, your mouth in an obvious lour. Her hold shifting around your neck as she tried to shift your jaw out of its current position, making you tilt your head to give her a sharp, side-eye.

You can't help but bark out a mocking giggle, appearing to be sicko while being manhandled by your very own gender while a taunt left your fuming mouth.

"---what's your kind? I doubt your kind may be human,"

Queen Makeda scoffed after hearing that, pushing you to the ground which has left you heaving breaths and coughing out from the lack of it. Your fingers quickly grabbing onto your growing belly to protect whatever Eanraig believed there is to be inside of you. A child that he was cognizant of; slightly still leaving you in disbelief because of how you weren't seeing any changes at the image of your belly.

Until, you've realized that your period haven't visited you since the last week.

The realization had you staring at the ground you were currently sitting upon while the queen stood before you with all her might and certainty. Your instincts telling you to cease the in-denial for your pregnancy because it was the truth.

"You are awfully disrespectful. Just like your mutant."

At the mere acknowledgement of that towards your witcher, your longstanding antagonism for her has given you all the willpower of spitting on the ground she was standing on, tilting your head up at her from your seated position with utmost spite, glaring from below her in the greatest hostility you can ever give.

"You're not my queen. So I give you the least amount of my respect, Ma-ke-da. That's your name, right? Is there another word for Bitch here?---You're a bloody skank! Have I got the accent correct for everyone? Or should I continue my fake British accent? would you like it to be Scottish?"

Hushed gasps has been audibly heard from the queen's maids who stood aligned in vertical. Their posture slightly curved in a bow and never giving their gazes towards their majesty and had them glued to the ground. Howbeit, their hearing couldn't be helped as it was a natural instinct to listen despite of being ordered not to.

They've been disoriented from their prior poses, taking heed of how you've disrespect the queen who was reigning the whole kingdom. She reached out behind her, ushering over the court lady who was holding onto the used golden kirtle that seemed to be owned by a maiden who left the castle or has been punished to death.

In a cruel gesture, Queen Makeda has balled up the dress with her hands. Throwing them over your head that felt too impetuous and disfavourable because of how her servants felt the need to slyly giggle from the background.

"Womanly hands are needed in this palace," she brashly scoffed, tip-toeing over her tone like a taunt, playing over a prey she decided to amuse for the moment. You heedlessly yanked off the dress overthrown on your head and avoided their loathe-filled peepers who find your vulnerability entertaining their day.

The evil queen couldn't help but laugh beneath her breath, watching you bask in your own solitude and hopelessness---being a woman they believed as a thief or a girl with no name nor worth of living a happy and abounding life. A renegade in their kingdom that deserves the least amount of attention and respect.

It was probably your doppelganger's reality as she lives in Kaedwen; thriving in the most difficult way to live in their world---more desperate to stay alive more than you back in earth.

"I suggest you must help the maids as they serve us through night and day," she nonchalantly reiterated with a slip of her laughter every now and then. Her offhand way of talking resulting in giving her the most stony lour you could muster.

Queen Makeda spurned your woebegone with a simple simper, passing over the sepulchral spirit radiating off you. She'd turn her heels away, parading through your chambers with her servants following suit, but not forgetting to leave without a ridicule.

"Better than any corporal punishment. Am I right, tramp?"

Sundown came earlier than you've calculated. Being given the job of a scullery maid for this certain day has been backbreaking. You've scoured the dirtiest pots and plates with all your healing strength, straining your energy for the heck of it all because of how heavy their utensils and equipment can be. More than how the stuff in your workplace were much more lighter than ever. It wasn't a punishment you've expected from them considering how they've injured you in the flesh, taking Geralt's words accountable or was this just a hoax of their upcoming plans?

You knew that it won't be the only job given. Five days living in the castle has been a crestfallen experience that not any normal earthling could handle well.

Which has probably been also the reason why you were too stressed and angry with everyone and anyone including the father of your unborn child, raving in bluster for his slow-witted self in terms of one's feelings.

That was probably one of the disadvantages of being in love with a witcher. Geralt hardly receives love and care that he doesn't know how to distinguish it even for himself.

Laying on the cold surface of such mattress; back flat with aching muscles and healing wounds, one palm reached up to your slightly bilged stomach. The feeling of another human growing inside weren't obvious yet. Thinking that it was probably just because of the pastry they've fed you with which has gotten your stomach swelling.

"Are you really in there?" you quietly muttered to the ceiling, feeling your chest tighten from being all alone and dealing with what the witcher has said to you before he left. His words becoming an echo of your regret and sadness.

"---Or am I just bloated, Little princess?"

Soft caresses over your slightly curved skin has given you goosebumps all over your body. The act feeling too real for you to be talking to a baby that has probably never learn to kick yet. Simultaneously, a sigh left your mouth when you truly believed and hold on to Geralt's infertility tales when he has gotten you pregnant out of the blue.

Magic. Right. All of what was going on between you both was magic after all, even your growing child. He has been right after all.

"Am I really having a baby grow inside of me when I haven't expected this at all? your daddy probably has great swimmers---oh, wait. He should've been infertile." the train of thought has been ceased, your mouth curling in the opposite of a smile. Frowning being your constant expression the past few days with a round-the-clock dismal mood once you wake up and try to have a nap when you were hardly being given the chance to just like how your insomnia tries to eat you alive again.

It hasn't even visited you since before you've woken up from a different dimension. Insomnia has never been an issue when you've arrived in the continent. Perhaps, the witcher may be one of the reasons for your inner beasts to hide. Though, with the mist surrounding you both---it started to pay you a visit especially after experiencing physical and mental struggles through out your stay in the castle.

No matter how disappointed and angry you were with Geralt, he has still been your refuge from all the danger that his world can cause.

"Is this really happening? I'm going to be a mother now?" you went on in talking to no one in particular, caressing your stomach against the palm of your hand like how a mother would.

"---with the brooding witcher as your father?"

The mouth curled downward languidly pulled the strings to a solemn smile. Memories of Geralt and how he was finding you unappealing as each day passes was like a reality meant for you because even men in your world eventually leaves when you were showing them your humanly capabilities---the darker part of you that nobody can ever tolerate.

Even the witcher found you pathetic---a man from another world seeing what you actually were. Not an angel that all men believed you to be.

With a growing baby inside of you, it would be difficult to forget Geralt because of how he'd left a part of him inside of you and will eventually be born in a world you were fearful of.

When you said back in earth, that you wanted a child with Legolas. You didn't mean for it to happen in real life. Especially from a man who don't take children as a gift---something worth to be proud of as you remembered how Eanraig said that he would rather have his own child as a bait for monsters than to let him live in the continent.

Your heart was tightening further as you continued talking to your unborn offspring and into the brisk, solitary midnight with nothing but shadows to comfort your forlorn soul, "Your poppa' certainly won't accept you if he knows about your existence. Based on how we got into a fight over feelings we both don't understand." Pause.

"---If I shave his white head, will it be worth the revenge? You think he cares for his hair? Or maybe hide his witcher potions somewhere else where he would have a difficult time seeing it?"

You couldn't help but slightly giggle to yourself. The sound dethering and fading in the end from how forced it sounded; faking the happiness and trying to uplift your spirits by thinking that Geralt would still accept you in his life after tying him in a responsibility that he will surely detest.

"---I still can't help but think of him though. Especially after knowing you're growing inside of me now. I doubt he actually thinks of me more than I do,"

"Maybe the witcher might want to say that he loves you and that he is still on his witch hunt!"

Catching you off-guard, a squeaky, upbeat, childish voice resonated in your chambers. Hushed to the most quietest voice she could do, standing before the end of your bed was a curly haired child who was grinning amongst the shadows she tries to hide herself in. Her two front teeth sitting apart which has made her appear more adorable than ever. The features she had slowly coming to a point that it seemed to be familiar---like you've seen her face and heard her voice back in earth.

The child standing before you was a little demon known in your dimension. Delilah Cincinnati. A child who has always made your work more difficult than it can ever be---a nuisance who could always get you tripping when you were serving food for customers. You've had a nickname for her, Deli-the-menace that came from the character 'Dennis-the-menace' but this one was a little girl and her devilish grin suited her name.

But, her grin seemed to be different in this world. It was more sweet, utterly masking in pure innocence that made you sit your back on the headboard. Your fingers reaching below your pillows to grab onto the kitchen knife you've managed to sneak in because of how you didn't trust anyone in the castle---taking Geralt's advices seriously.

People would probably think you were crazy, but you've been thinking that this child in front of you would transform into an evil gnome and eat your unborn baby because she was hungry for flesh.

"Delilah?" your voice turned squeaky as well. Swallowing the nervousness back down the pit of your stomach, you crumpled your legs under your thighs, shifting away from the child when she dragged her feet upon the foot of the bed; crawling towards you with a smile.

She jumped the half of her body beside you, tucking her little legs under the bed sheets. The ends of it pulled by her tiny fingers and tucked under her chin whilst turning her whole body with a ceaseless smile.

"You're a silly lady! I'm no Delilah, miss witcheress."

The adorable child snuggled closer on your side, hiding behind your body as if she was sneaking from someone.

"Princess Corinthia of Kaedwen. You can call me 'Coco' instead. Just don't tell my mother!" she placed a finger in between her pursed lips, giggling behind as she thoroughly sneaked her miniscule body in between you and the headboard.

You've inhaled a deep breath before being cut-off by the princess and her mischievous warning, "Shh. The knights are searching for me!"

She pointed towards a large sized painted picture of the whole royal family hung over the stone walls, enclosing her mouth with her small palms while she whispered.

"---A secret door."

Princess Corinthia offered another giggle that has kept your mouth zipped because of how untrustful she still is to you. Though, you dropped the knife back under your pillows again when she seemed to be harmless than what you imagined her to be; a little devil or a tiny monster that she might be in the witcher's dimension.

"I am a curious child. I've been hearing the tales of a white haired beast slayer stepping foot in our fortress! The maids even said that he has brought a frog for him to protect and this frog is his bride as every single person in the palace has gossiped about. Are you the frog? Do you have a curse like my brother too?"

At the mention of that, the scowl suddenly became one prominent expression since the moment you arrived in the castle. Huffing out a breath of exasperation over what nickname you've gotten. The witcher's frog. It didn't sound too appealing for you and even for the child because she was giggling through it all.

"A frog?! Seriously?! They were calling me ugly. How rude of them," you stated as a matter of fact.

"Our maids are just probably thirsty whores who may want your witcha'!" your eyes grew from the profanity that left her mouth. A single, plain warning of a look has been given to the child.

"That's a bad word."

The castle princess ignored your upbraid, palms covering her mouth with her eyes turning into big saucers that looked like to be as if she was guilty over saying such blasphemy.

"---because of the epic that his humble bard has created, many have been less frightened over their kind. Though, some are quite suspicious and still looking at them in disgust just like how most of our servants are. Is he handsome? they were chattering about him last supper in the kitchen! Also, they've talked about how they have seen how he didn't think twice to point his sword at any of our men---Chivalry at its finest from a butcher as said by them,"

From the way she has mentioned it came with astonishment over the witcher's valiant and chivalrous actions. Your mind in a blurry mess when you have seen him the first time---being brought to a room where Geralt has reacted in an aggressive way towards everyone in the room that not even a king can scare him away when you were a bleeding mess shoved on the floors. Your heart constantly being poked by a knife after realizing that a fight came after his magnanimity, the other side of you thinking that he has done it out of affection and care. Expecting it to be more than just how a sentiment is towards a friend because you've been seeing him more than just your confidante.

Was this how friends with benefits is in their world?

You couldn't help the crinkles on the side of your eyes. A small, close mouthed smile warping your face at the thought of the witcher you were highly proud of deep inside.

"He is quite dashing, brooding and utterly like a knight in shining armor, don't you think?"

"I may want to have a husband like him in the future!"

"I doubt you could," you simply testified, remembering that princesses in the medieval era are forbidden to marry a commoner. More so, for a witcher whom everyone repels towards their kind.

"---A princess can only be with a prince. Unless, you're in a Disney story. Then you can be like---"

She immediately cut you off with a sad pout, "Aren't witchers like a prince? beast slayers but still a prince?"

You've turned to look into her eyes; genuine and seeming to be in a different state of mind as you sincerely implored, "To me---he's a knight. An imperfectly, perfect scarred knight who always saves my life." pause. "---Sometimes, picking a commoner is better than being with a perfect prince because they always make you believe in fairytales that don't exist. The witcher's a mutant. A freak of nature that they always see of him. An experimented human who had no other choice but to accept his lonely fate. But, this doesn't make him any less human, Princess Coco."

Princess Corinthia had her almond, doe eyes peering up at you. Her spirit filled in utmost inquiry for what your witcher really actually is. Unable to perceive how he also looked like because she had only seen his armored, broad back as he gently dropped you on the bed. Both of you seeming to be in a debate while his face inches away from yours, seeing him lean all the way forward to give you a pucker of his lips. A gesture that the princess has always seen from servants who had a secretive relationship with their knights. The opposite of what she sees from her parents because you never leaned away from Geralt unlike how the queen avoids her husband's affections.

Endearing to be seen from you both because her parents hardly appeared to cherish one another.

"Geralt has a kind heart that no other prince may let me see from and I wish for your future to be best and full of love like how I wish to have,"

"Geralt? is that the witcher's name?"

You've heard loud stomps of footsteps banging outside the room, knowing that it was probably chevaliers searching for the young princess. She was quick to pull the blanket over her head, forcefully shoving herself on your side for cover. Hence, it also made you slip under the covers, grabbing onto her fragile shoulders to pull her inside to veil away from the night that wanted to pull her in for a nightmare. The cloying feeling swaying your insides because of a young child that could delicately press onto your heartstrings, showing you how precious it was to have a daughter who was utterly sweet and gullible.

You couldn't help but giggle under the covers with her, subtly reaching for your growing stomach with a hidden caress.

"Yes it is, Princess. Now, hide!"

Morning came after and the night has still given you beasts as your foe, battling through the hours which has never given you enough sleep. The queen's princess having more sleep as she laid on your arm, telling you that she also had her own monsters to challenge with because she slept alone in her bed, thinking that it was all a lie when she dozed off after half an hour of your stories about Geralt and his adventures.

An understanding hitting you like a freight train when she began snoring as she slept on your bed.

The princess just needed someone to cuddle with. Comfort from another woman that the queen should've been doing because it was her daughter and not yours to begin with.

Dressed in your servant's clothes and standing in the middle of an empty kitchen, most servants have been called to be in the queen's chambers except for you. With a gurgling stomach and a set of pastries lined up in front of you and on the decrepit, wooden table---your fingers reach out for a piece of marzipan cakes until it has been whacked away from your hands with a tolerating slap of strength.

You were too hungry to even process that you have grabbed onto a kitchen knife, seeming to be in a greater starvation as each day passes by due to cravings for more food everyday. The blade has been hastily pointed upon the man's weak spot on his neck---remembering Jaskier's teachings about what vulnerable spot does it take to slash one's neck for him or her to bleed till her death.

Stunned forest green eyes were all wide as you point the tip upon his jugular. Your teeth barred and appearing wild before the familiar gallant whom you remembered to have seen back when Tybalt has forced his entry through your home. He was the cavalier who wanted nothing to do with Jaskier being shoved to the ground. The hesitant knight that you awfully remember.

"What are you going to do to me? Hurt me again?" you bark out loud, your fingers slightly trembling as the blade was close to his porcelain skin,  "---You knights are---!!!"

The obsidian eyed gallant raised his palm to covers your mouth, his gaze shifting around the empty kitchen before he talked, "Shhh. Don't eat those."

"---Mmmh!" you battled against his hold, shifting away but he forcefully kept you close by, never risking for you to scream or run away.

He shook his head, seeing him anxiously bite on his lower lip and looking away. His hand promptly leaving your mouth as he reached to grab onto one dessert that he saw one charmed servant bake and pour a nasty vile in the batter, "They're poisoned. I've heard it from Tybalt that you might be having a cub growing inside of you. One of the maids have been enchanted, poisoning your food."

You couldn't help but shut your eyes close in exasperation over people wanting to put you in danger. Your hunches immediately thinking about Ingrith because she has been the only person who couldn't stand you and the child you were bearing.

"Notice how no one eats them?"

"But, I seen them eat before I'm around,"

"But, not these. Correct?"

The maids have never eaten any dessert---nor had it look touched. They were devouring food, right. But, not desserts because somehow they suddenly had no sweet tooth over pastries; slyly knowing that you had a penchant over sweets.

It was probably the reason why they were simply poisoned.

You couldn't help but bite the insides of your cheeks, pulling out a chair from the table to tiredly sit and sigh about how stressful it is to stay alive in Geralt's dimension when people wanted you dead since the moment that an out-of-the-blue child has been living inside your stomach.

Was it a mistake made? was the child a mistake so that was why people were scared for it to be born? Eanraig has said that she would be born with a purpose to save their dimension---receiving such help to save humanity and cease chaos.

As much as how difficult it was to understand that, the only thing that has ever been a mistake was trying to honestly tell Geralt you love him before being cut-off by your witcher.

"Is it true?" the gallant curiously inquired, leaning his hip on the edge of the table as he crossed his arms in front of you.

"---that the Witcher is your child's father?"

It was still quite awkward to tell knowing that he was supposed to be infertile. But, being in a world where magic exists probably isn't the only thing peculiar after all.

"Yes."

"Oh, great. It wasn't just plain gossip after all," he momentarily exhaled a breath, rolling his shoulders back. Quietly moaning as he stretched his limbs, his youthful, juvenile timbre in his tone turning squeaky and nonchalant, "---They'll loathe you more especially that you're up the spout with the witcher's child,"

You could see the disgust in their eyes. People in the castle who somehow managed to see you. Though, the case with Eanraig, princess Coco and this chevalier was different because they looked at you as if there was nothing wrong which it should've been.

"Why?"

He pursed his lips and shook his head, grabbing onto another set of pastry that looked like some pudding as he raised it to his nose, subtly sniffing the food before calmly throwing it back away again, "That's not a question. Think of it---you're pregnant by a monster slayer who had tales of his kind that he is completely barren due to his genetic mutations. Then, you're suddenly carrying his sprog for magical reasons,"

Your eyes quickly narrowed with how sarcastic he sounded.

He continued his chatter, sighing every once in a while as he said his words that seemed to be a quote coming from another, "---Witchers are the offspring of foul sorcery and witchcraft. They are unscrupulous scoundrels without conscience and virtue, veritable creatures from hell capable only of taking lives..."

The latter exhaled one last long breathe, dramatic enough to pay heed over how you were trying to see through him; thinking what kind of person he was because after being injured within the castle has made you wary of anyone who wanted to talk. It even got to the point that you were guessing he wanted to talk and seek out information from you.

"---I've always remembered Amaury and his beliefs over witchers since he has encountered one before he was killed by him," he gave a small beam, showing teeth while he was in a flashback of memories from his journey before with a deceased close friend.

"I remember he goes by the name Auckes---maybe your witcher might know him,"

You simply nodded. Still cautious of his presence while you hugged your stomach from him.

"There are other witchers too?"

Geralt has left that question unanswered, back when you were serving ale for him. You've tried to remember that name for when you try to ask your witcher---that is if you're still planning on talking to him after the fight you and him had or if he would even care to answer.

Eventually, it was needed to talk to the father of your own child of surprise. A child of surprise that had no law being given or said.

He noticed you were dazing off, too deep in your thoughts that got him sauntering over the kitchen cabinets, slipping a hand inside to try and eyeball some fruit he tried to hid this morning. The man was thinking you were starving already which tells why you were staring out of nowhere, considering that you were eating for two.

"---Auckes became an assassin. He was formerly a witcha',"

You've snapped out of your stupor, the empathy you had for people swiftly slipping through your mind, "I'm sorry to hear that. May your friend's soul rest in peace."

"Amaury might be having a good time where ever he is right now,"

He strolled back to where you sat, standing before you with a bundle of apples, oranges and boiled eggs. His hands reaching out to give them while whispering the next sentences like he was forbidden to do it from the start or even talk to you, "Watch out for anyone. They have an entire repugnance for his kind and anyone related to him," you've taken the food out of his hands, placing them all on your apron and bunching them to yourself.

The lean built gallant took a step back, hands behind his back and realizing that he was younger than you thought. In the same age as Jaskier when he gave you a boyish smile, "Take care of yourself. Especially your child,"

You've finally beamed before him, slowly loosening up around his infectious presence. Self deciding that he was worth to trust after he took a bite of his own apple hidden inside the pocket of his breeches, showing you that the food he gave was poison free.

"Do you have a name?"

"Of course. The name's Otker."

"Thank you for the warning, Otker." the latter gave a toothy grin before it fell in a hot second, reaching to cup his nape in sheer embarrassment for whatever he was thinking.

"Forgive me for I have not helped you through Tybalt's plans," he honestly apologized.

Without warning, there were voices echoing outside. Voices of maidens chewing the rag over what the queen has told them and it made you shot up from your seat, the bulwark surrounding you suddenly building itself from hearing other people closing in---people who weren't worth the trust.

"It's fine. You had no other choice. You can't betray the man who you work for. Evil or not."

Otker cocked his head to the side with a knowing smile, his mouth in an amused straight line as he walked away with his steps going backward. He was agreeing to what you've said but also somehow disagreeing too.

"Tybalt's not all evil," the green eyed gallant pursed his lips from his psychoanalysis over the higher vampire after working with him for half a year or so; having faith over his ungodly gestures like his appearance had been a misunderstanding for his wicked characteristics that you find in him.

"---but, he isn't good either. Just being whispered words of propaganda by everyone surrounding him,"

A simple shake of your head was enough to get Otker shrugging his shoulders because he knew you weren't convinced after Tybalt basically stabbing you on the hip before he walked away as the judging servants came in the kitchen one by one again---planning to continue the stress they have been pouring.

Taglist for WOTN: (Strikethrough means your blog can’t be tagged. Please check your settings, bb’s! Thank you.) @alyxkbrl @himarisolace @barkingbullfrog @ayamenimthiriel @hellodevilslittlesister @turkish276 @spookypeachx @grungelovebug @fangirl-inthe-us @nympeth @amirahiddleston @gabethelobster @dreaming-about-fanfictions @uncoolcloudyhead @melaninstylezz @psychosupernaturalhero @missjenniferb @dance-dreamer​​​ @marvelousell​​​ @kingniazx​​​ @angelias134​​​ @tapismyforte​​​ @chook007​​​ @covid-donotenter​​​ @deadlydemon​​ @cheesecakeisapie​​ @angelofthor​​​ @carrieannewaywardson, @plantingmum, @stuckupstucky​​, @shesthelastjedi​​, @a--1--1--3​​, @gutfucks​​, @raynosaurus-rex​​, @britty443​​, @suhke3​​, @shadowclawstudio88​​, @ruthoakenshield​​, @just-a-sad-donut​​, @gxrdenr0se, @singeramg​​  @friendlyneighbourhoodweirdo​, @alexwinchester23​

Overall witcher taglist: @pizza-eater-i-ate-the-pizza​​, @crazybutconfidentaf​​

General taglist for any Henry Cavill fics: @agniavateira​​, @iloveyouyen​​, @rahdaleigh​​, @silverkitten547​​, @henrythickcavill​​, @kaatelyyynn​​, @marvelousell​​, @madelinelina​​, @summersong69​​, @raynosaurus-rex​​, @fckdeusername​​, @evansislife​​

[jpegjade]

Void - Spencer

I’ve weighed whether or not to put this one out there. i’ve spent a day just sitting on it, editing, and rewriting some parts. i decided to put this out there bc i realize that i have friends here who go through the same things i do and it might help them. so to all my friends out there, old, new, or the ones i have yet to meet, i’m sorry we’re in this but i’m happy we’re in this together. 

Warnings: Okay so i will say this now and i mean it: if you are struggling with depression and feel uncomfortable during any point in this fic, do. not. read. the. rest. i tried to scale back a little bit bc i wrote it when i was having a really bad time (and probably still having that time rn lmao) so i didn’t include details and it’s a little bit ambiguous but it’s dealing with a hard topic: hopelessness and suicidal ideation. like i said, nothing graphic and no details but it is suggestive and real. so no fluff. 

__________________

The world is such a dark fucking place. There’s nothing good in the world. There’s nothing good for you to experience anymore. The world was a dark, tar colored hell. 

Nothing brought you joy. You could fake it so well on the surface, pretending the world was in color for you. The only colors you experienced were void of emotion, void of feeling, just void. The world around you was void of joy, happiness. There was nothing you wanted more than to escape. Any version of a sweet release would be perfectly fine. Something that you could deal with, some way to deal with the world. 

“Hey.” Spencer said, bringing you out of your thought bubble haze. He walked through the door, gripping his satchel.

“Hmm? Hey baby.” You plastered a fake smile on your face just for him. 

Spencer knew you were going through a rough time but he didn’t know exactly how bad it was. He didn’t know you had written notes for each of your family members and Spencer. He didn’t know that you thought about the easiest way to go, what required the most courage and the least amount of energy. He didn’t know you were scared to leave. 

“You look tired. Have you had a nap today?” He said, leaning down to give you a kiss on the cheek. 

“No, I’m okay. Just tired in general, I guess.” You said, watching him put his bag down. 

He came over to sit next to you, wrapping his arm around your shoulders, pulling you close to him. He smelled like fall. You wondered if you would miss that, if you would miss him. Would you miss anything?

“Well, maybe we can relax together? Take a nap, watch a movie?” He looked down at you, stone faced as ever. 

“Yeah, maybe.” You said, staring off into the distance. Everything seemed to be off in the distance for you, all of it. The future, the past, now. It all seemed so far away from you. The world seemed so far away from you. 

“Are you okay? You don’t seem like you’re all the way here.” Spencer said, kissing the top of your head. 

“I’m just tired. Maybe I will take that nap with you.” You put on another fake smile, getting up to get something to drink from the kitchen. Everything was so exhausting, even Spencer. 

You hated that you felt that way. You loved Spencer with every part of you, you never wanted to let him go. But you just wanted to take off, go somewhere, escape. That’s all you thought about: escaping. 

“Hey, y/n? I’m going to get changed out of these clothes.” Spencer called, hoping you heard him. In one ear and out the other, just like everything else he said lately. 

You always felt so bad when it came to Spencer. He didn’t ask for this. He didn’t deserve to go through this. You didn’t want him to deal with you anymore but any time you brought it up to him, he promised you weren’t a burden. He always promised you weren’t a burden but you knew, deep down, that he was lying. He was lying to you in exchange for your lies to him, pretending you’re happy when you’re miserable. The two of you were lying to each other and to yourselves. He knew you weren’t okay but wanted to believe otherwise. You knew Spencer was attached to you but you pretended he was detached from your relationship. 

“Baby? Come lay with me?” Spencer called, being needy. You loved when he was needy when you felt well. When you were feeling good, you loved the fact that he was open to show a type of emotion, even after all he went through. 

“Only for a little while.” You called back, downing half a glass of water really quickly. 

You climbed into bed, curling into his lap in bed. He liked when he could hold you just as much as he liked being held. You sat there silently, annoyed with the fact that anyone was touching you right now. All you wanted was to disappear. 

“Can we talk?” Spencer mumbled. 

“Yeah, sure.” You really did try to sound upbeat but in the end, you weren’t able to do it. 

“How are you really doing? And please don’t lie... “ Spencer said, sighing. 

“Spence…” You just wanted everything to go away, just like this conversation. 

“Look, I know I can’t fix this. I have been looking for ways to make this better for you because you are suffering and I see it every day. I can’t… I don’t know how to stop it and I’m scared that you’re going to do something that I really can’t fix.” He said, slowly. 

“There’s no way to stop this.” You said, flatly. “You can’t stop it and neither can I. I’m beyond help. The meds don’t work. The therapy doesn’t work. The coping mechanisms dont fucking work and I’m so damn tired.” You said all that without emotion and it scared Spencer. 

These days, you scared Spencer more than any murderer did. His greatest fear was losing you and he fought to keep his head straight because he knew he had you. All this time, he knew he had you and it was terrifying him to think that you could be gone today, tomorrow, the day after that and he couldn’t do a thing to stop it. Could he?

“You can’t leave… Not like this…” Spencer said, trying to rack his brain of different responses that might help you. He couldn’t think of anything that wasn’t selfish, on his part. 

Everything he had to say was selfish. It was all about how he didn’t want you to go, how he would feel, how he would be affected when you were gone. Everything he thought of was about him and that frustrated him. He just wanted to help you, not try to guilt you into anything by making it about how he feels but… 

“Spencer, there’s no point. Okay? There’s no point in going through the motions anymore. I am in so much pain on the inside, nothing fills it. I am so tired. I feel alone constantly. I feel like there’s nothing left for me here. I am broken. I am broken. I am broken.” You started crying but you weren’t sure why. 

Spencer just pulled you close to him, feeling your body shaking. He couldn’t tell if it was anger or sadness or if you were just cold but your body wasn’t still. 

You tried to get up, get away from him, run, but he held you tighter. You just wanted to get out of that room, get out of your skin, get out of existence but Spencer wouldn’t let you. He just held you close and rubbed your back. 

“I can’t make you stay. I can’t give you this fake positivity. I won’t guilt you into staying. If you want to do this, it’s ultimately up to you. But what I can do is tell you that I love you. I loved you when I got to know you. I love you now. I will love you no matter what you decide to do.” Spencer said. He sounded so fragile, like he was going to break at any moment. 

“I don’t know what I’m going to do, Spence.” You said, numbly. “All I know is that I can’t live like this. I can’t survive like this. I wasn’t built to survive this and I’m so scared of what comes next…” 

There was a silence and you heard Spencer sniffle. He was truly at a loss for words. How could he miss that it was this bad? He was a profiler. He knew that everyone had an end game but he couldn’t tell if your endgame was leaving him or not, leaving this world or not. So he just sniffled and stayed quiet, trying to hold everything back. 

“Spencer?” 

“Hmm?” He responded, nervous. 

“What’s the easiest way to go? I’ve done research but… I wanted to ask my smartass boyfriend.” You chuckled and it turned sour. It wasn’t funny but it was a reflex. 

“Can we please not talk about this? I want to help you get better. I want to use all my energy trying to figure out how to help you feel like living is worth it. I don’t want to think about finding you…” Spencer’s voice caught in his throat. 

“Would you miss me?” You whispered, staring blankly at the wall feet in front of you. 

“Y/n…” Spencer paused. Your automatic thought was that he was going to pull bullshit out of his ass so you could feel better. You sighed, prepared for something generic. 

“You don’t realize the effect you have on people, on me. The world is so dark to you because you are a beacon of light. You are the lighthouse in everyone’s storm. That’s why everyone comes to you, looking for hope. You are a shining light and everyone sees it but you. Your world is dark because you look out and see nothing but the darkness, nothing but the storm.” 

Spencer’s breath wavered and you felt his thumb start moving across your thigh. He was nervous and fidgety, hoping he said the right words. 

“I miss you every moment I leave for work. I miss you on trips. I miss you at the office. I miss you whenever you’re not holding my hand. I miss you when you’re at work, when you can’t talk to me. I miss you. So yes, I would miss you if you weren’t here for me to come home to. And I know that might be comforting for a moment but at the end of the day, it’s not about me. It has never been about me. This is about whether or not you have the will to stay, whether or not you want to be here.” Spencer’s heart raced. 

“I guess you’re right.” You said, growing tired. You had a lot to think about.

[ilkkawhat]

Any tips for first time writers? Specifically any tips and tricks for writing CSI stories and the Nick/Greg ship? Trying to stay in character and make the story interesting like a show episode instead of a boring text procedural is hard.

lmao as someone who is forever insecure about my own writing when it comes to keeping the characters in character, I think something to keep in mind is that you may view a character differently than someone else--and sometimes those views align with others, and most of the time it's better than what's presented in canon, and it can be really difficult to get confident about that, but I think that creating anything, even if it's not just writing--drawing, giffing, photo edits, etc, you do know and love that character enough to bring them to life under your hands and it's something that's just so like, poetic about keeping these characters alive, even if the show offed them or the show is cancelled, in these works (honestly the song "poet" by bastille says this best imo) and you may end up discovering parts of yourself as you explore these characters in depth, you'll learn more about them, too, and the more you write, the more confidence you will gain

but be weary of the validation trap (says someone who falls into it literally every time I post a fic)--do not rely on comments and feedback to let you know you're doing it "right." the fact that you're getting thoughts into words onto paper is good enough, and you are good enough and even if you don't end up sharing it, you still did something special that nobody else has done before, and that, is amazing!

I'm not gonna lie, a huge weakness of mine that I feel I've known ever since I started writing CSI fic is that I really don't do well in making cases for the CSIs to work on--and even when I do, the case is usually forgotten by the end of the fic and I end up just kinda focusing on the emotions between the characters and describing their feelings and actions the best I can and unfortunately the plot sometimes suffers because of that.

I guess it really depends on what you want out of your story--do you want a really intriguing case and basically make an episode of CSI, or do you want to kind of bend out of the procedural drama, and just write something fluffy like Nick/Greg going on a roadtrip or something actiony like them getting into some sort of trouble? (as I often do lmao)

Something that does always help me when I do decide I want an actual like, "plot" to the fic beyond just playing around with the characters and making them do things or experience things is that I'll make myself a very flexible outline--which I will admit, at times, does kinda drain the fun out of the actual writing part but I found that I'll try to write chapters/fics in segments in this way, like I'll have the start of a fic, and then when I feel like I need to break but want to write what I got going next, I'll have something in brackets like: [Self deprecation at home/drinking, evil Nick in the mirror?] (for agony), and sometimes maybe a bigger summary, and sometimes less to just kinda remind myself of what I wanted to accomplish with a fic

BUT know that there are gonna be things that pop up sometimes. twists that come to you halfway through a fic--or if you're lucky, you'll find that your reader friends will kinda give you a twist to add in (my fic Last Breath is the greatest example of this--I originally was gonna do like, 12 chapters but then @dannilea said "HEY MK GIVE NICK AMNESIA" and then the fic got doubled in length lmao) so don't feel confined to any sort of outline. go with the flow, go with what feels right for you.

I know it's a lesson I'm still learning myself, but do not pressure yourself with these sorts of things. there are no deadlines. you're not doing anything wrong. if you don't like something you wrote? don't delete it (i've deleted so many things--fics, my entire blog, old art and gifs I did and it's one of my biggest regrets that I carry with me and god...it just hurts) but don't be afraid to tweak, re-write or rework if you need to--I know ao3 has an option where you can even say something is a "remix" of another work if you write a fic and then somewhere down the line, decide to expand on it or change it up? (I think it's meant for that at least, I haven't done that sort of thing....yet)

and that's another thing--you'll always be learning new things as you keep writing. I've been writing since I was like, twelve years old. Had a long ass depressive gap (though I did still write some things, just not...as intensely as I used to) before I came back to the CSI fandom (which I never felt I contributed to before, when I joined tumblr I posted some caps but that was about it, it really wasn't until 2018 that I started giffing and writing and three years later lmao here we are!) and there are just hard lessons you do learn--like I said, the validation trap and pressure and all of that

but motivation wise, something I've been (trying) to do is write at least 100 words per day. Doesn't have to be a specific fic, doesn't have to be anything I intend to make a fic, but just...getting the words flowing. But again, no pressure, because I recently had another depressive bout and went 33 days without writing and it climaxed to me having another mental breakdown swearing I was never gonna write again and damn near deleting everything and giving up.........only to start writing again the next day (and full disclosure, I did have a friend helping me literally every day with that and if they read this, I hope they know how forever grateful I am that they convinced me to keep going and I would not actually be here without them)

You will need to recharge, you will need to be mindful of outside stresses that may be impacting your creative energies. And sometimes, you can try doing things not relating to writing at all. Make a playlist of songs that make you think about the fic; if you can, draw or make photo edits of the fic. find a friend to bounce ideas off of--so many of my fics were enriched by that, I can't even begin to list them all lol.

But above all, again, just know that what you're writing is unique to you, nobody else will be able to write the way you do, and that is just...so special. writing can be difficult, it's exhausting, it's a thankless job at times but when those words start clicking together and your fingers just keep typing/writing, you'll just kinda get this like, rush like nothing I've ever been able to match.

and lmao I know you said specifically CSI and Nick/Greg and feel like I got sidetracked--but the great thing about CSI is I feel like you'll have excuses to put them in situations given their line of work, but like I said before, you can bend out of the genre a little bit. Have Nick and Greg go on a vacation, or make an AU (even something as wild as a sci-fi AU--honestly Specimen Stokes is the most fun I've had in writing the past three years) or if you do want to stick to canon, and don't want to make a whole new case or elaborate on the details--play with an established episode. If there was a Nick focused episode, what was Greg doing and vice versa? Did they talk about things afterwards, or did something happen leading up to the episode that made them act a certain way around each other?

I'll honestly find inspiration also just watching the episodes--something I've been doing in these past few months of my rewatch is making little ficlets about the episode, like I wrote one about Nick and Greg post 6x02 elaborating on the breathplay that Greg hinted about earlier in the episode, or I made a revenge fic for 14x12 where that douchey abusive husband went after Nick, etc. So sometimes it helps to dive back into canon and play in that sandbox too

I hope these tips can help get you started and honestly, don't feel obligated to agree or do any of these things I listed above. We all have different ways of going about writing, and it is just one big learning process and something I don't think I'm ever gonna perfect or master in any sort of way--(not to say I think I'm the worst writer in the world but I just...try to humble myself and not believe I'm the best or better than anybody else cause that's part of the validation trap, you get those ideas in your head and then it can destroy you when you realize you're definitely not)--and there will be times you get heavily discouraged, but...you just gotta keep going. keep pushing. find outside encouragement, but don't rely on it. practice a lot of self care and don't pressure yourself to finish or share or write more than you think you can. just...let it come, and enjoy the ride

I honestly feel like I'm one of the least qualified to say all of these things, but I really do hope it helps and hey, you already got one cheerleader, me, who will be excited to read whatever you share!