#i’ve been going to that beach since i’ve been a kid and it amazes me how similar it looks to an afternoon on the island of la grande jatte

[missmarveledsblog]

It's fate part two ( Bradley bradshaw x reader)

summary : bradley can't stay away and well jake soon finds out leading to a blow up game of dogfight football

warning: none its still goofy fun well one fight but other than that it's fluff

previous part

Never had he been sure of anything then fact was he sitting across from his future wife. From the way she laughed to smile , how she animatedly told him of the different kids in her class and how each was a character in their own right . he imagine would she talk like that about their kid albeit he was getting a little ahead  since he hadn’t even asked her on the first date nor did her brother his fellow aviator and well close friend he was even talking to her in the first place .  yet in that moment i wasn’t on his mind , jake wasn’t on his mind as he sat in the cafe on what was the third time he was meeting with the woman he couldn’t get out of his head. 

“ i’ve not let you get a word in have i ?” she chuckled looking up as she took a bite of her brownie . 

“ seriously talk away it amazing to hear about little katie and her overcoming the sandpit but i do wanna know if little zack got his dog cat yet?” he smiled almost dreamily as she laughed  the way her head fell back and the way the sound literally warmed his insides better then any coffee he’s drank so far taking full advantage of his weekend off  not caring to go to the beach  or beat jake in dog tag football like he usually is no bradley is content with sitting in a cafe listening about kids he never even saw . so lost in her not even the buzzing on his own phone snapped this spell she had on him till her own went off . 

“ sorry let me take this” she smiled before bringing it up to her ear. “ hey idiot … yeah i can come and bradley can bring me  .. what he’s here with me know  yeah jake we will be there soon” she rolled her eyes before hanging up . “ my dumb brother wants us to meet him at the beach something about some game” she shrugged as bradley came crashing back to earth. 

“ yeah sure  lets go i’ll follow you” he smiled as took got ready to leave watching as she walked out. “ well i guess i’ll see my parent quicker than i thought i would “ he sighed  leaving a tip on table  before slowly heading to what was going to be his doom . 

From the look on jake seresins face when they arrive on the beach well doom was the right and accurate world to describe the following . 

“ I’ll sit with little seresin ..hey i’m natasha you can call me nat”  phoenix smiled really not wanting to be caught in the crossfire of what was about to come as Mav called the two captains to only be jake and bradley . 

“ i told you she’s off limits chicken “ jake glared getting in position . 

“ i told you it’s fate bagman “ rooster almost copied as the two glared it didn’t matter who was on side no this was between them two and them alone in this game .  the moment javy passed the ball throwing it to bob who ultimately tried to throw it back to jake only for fanboy to intercept and throw it to payback then in turn threw it too rooster .  well with who he was determined to impress stood on side lines rooster ran playing probably the best he had since he ever came across the game . 

“ 1 point to roosters team “ Mav called as y/n cheered making her brother pissed off . 

 Throughout the game both men done whatever in their power knocking each other over diving and dotting  til the scores where tied both panting and glaring at each other as their teammates honestly was happy to call it a tie . 

“ is it usually this … violent” y/n asked nat worried for both men . 

“ well there a more push rate here” nat winced instantly catching her on to what it  was . 

Once she watched as the two began head to head like to bulls charging til it was no longer just pushing and well fist started fly sending the men over pull them apart both men yelling at mav with bruise cheeks and egos and she walked closer. 

“ he’s dating my sister” 

“ it’s not a date …yet she’s an adult asshat” .

“ a girl really grow hell up both of you” mav rolled his eyes as the two began shouting back and forth . 

“ sorry sir may i try  “ she smiled sweetly up all doe eyes and sugarly sweet . 

“ i’m willing to try anything kid knock yourself out “ now what mav didn’t expect was the loud whistle  that shut the boys up or the fast she grab both of the men by the ear . 

“ now y’all gonna talk like adults or am going to show you how we treat misbehaving children  “ she looked between the two sternly as they instantly shut up . 

“ you can’t date rooster , one he’s old as hell and two he’s my friend” jake huffed. 

“ jakey buddy you have slept with  i could easily name five of my friends and another five co workers   another think if i wanna sleep with or date someone i will choose myself i am adult seem more of an adult then you” she crouched. 

“ i said that , i’m not old as hell ” rooster spoke up . 

“ and you well goading my brother and hitting him ain’t gonna happen again because idiot or not i kinda love him is that clear “ she  stood as he gulped and nodded. “ now  shake hands and grow up because i will give that man my number and jake can tell you how my mama kept his ass in straight line” she stomped over to Mav. 

“ sorry chicken “ jake grumbled. 

“ sorry bagman” . 

“ like you mean it jesus “ she rolled her eyes . 

“ sorry bradley .. shit maybe if she dates you  be less well that” .

“ sorry jake … dude i might marry you sister today” . 

“ you can take me on a date first bradley brooster radley “ she chuckled gathering her things. 

“ have you ever thought of joining the navy?” Mav asked shocked at the scene before him . 

“Oh and bradley pick me up at 7 “ was all she said before she headed up the beach . 

“ yessss ma’am… my wife is so pretty” he sighed happily . 

“ you aint married her yet” jake chuckled 

“ i’m gonna i’m telling you its’ ….” 

“ Fate “ the all groaned . 

Now as first date would be, he was never a ball of emotions as he was now almost pacing a hole in jake seresins floor as he waiting for her to get ready . 

“ really man i’ll lose my deposit you keep that up “ the blonde huffed eyes on the game that played on his television . 

“ sorry my nerves are gonna dent your income man i’m freaking out and all while in the chicks living room in front of you “. 

“ man where was confidence from earlier look for some weird reason she really likes you so i’m pretty sure even you couldn’t screw this up “

“ yeah thanks for the shiner really what my outfit needed “ he grumbled . 

“  you ready” she called and god she almost knocked him on his ass as he took in the sight of her man she could wear a potato sack and still look like a queen . the white sun dress hit her thighs or the red lips that paired well with her nails like something straight out of his fantasy . 

“ yeah .. yup ..yes.. Lets go “ he sighed ignoring the weird look jake was giving him or the way she was hiding her amusement . 

“ home by midnight” jake called . 

“ i’ll be home whenever i want to” she called back as door shut .

“ jesus he really is gonna be my brother in law” the blonde groaned .

part three

[lukeywritesstuff]

jack being in love with quinn’s best friend and maybe he finally gets the girl

Brothers Best Friend

Jack Hughes x Reader, Quinn Hughes x Platonic!Reader

Description: Mr. Jack Rowden is in love with his older brothers life long best friend.

Note: Jacks pov because sometimes I just like writing male pov. Also if I miss any ndtp boys ignore it there’s too many for me to remember them all 😍😍😍.

Warnings: fluff, angst, cursing, brotherly banter and fights, underage drinking, no Covid off scene sex.

Ever since we were kids Quinn has had this best friend, Y/N, ever since they met in like 2011 they’ve been best friends. They met when our babysitter brought Quinn, Luke and I to a park and since then the girls spent every day at our house after school, and since about 2014, I’ve been borderline in love with her. Her hair, her eyes, her smile, her body, her style, everything. Even things that have changed over the years due to growth and experimentation with fashion. I love it all. And yes I know. She doesn’t do it for me or any other men. But it still makes me happy to see her so confident and happy.

:-:-:-:

Fast forward to 2020, Quinn and I just bought our lake house, and us, Luke, Trevor, Cole, Matt, Alex, and Y/N have been here for a week. Since the season for us just ended we’ve just been relaxing and resting before we get partying and having fun.

The first weeks of summer consisted of me hanging out with the ndtp guys of my year, Luke with some of his friends and Quinn with Y/N, Brady and Josh. Then when we all got more comfortable within the living situations we started by bringing in alcohol and starting smaller parties with Luke only being 17 sometimes we’ll send him to our parents for a weekend because yeah I’m underage too but partying at 19 is better than partying at 17. At least I’m legal in SOME countries nearby and a legal adult too so I’m responsible for myself.

The first few parties were quite uneventful, until we decided to actually incorporate the lake and have a ‘lake party’ instead of a ‘pool party’ so when everyone showed up in swimsuits, it turned into a horny haven. This wasn’t the first time I saw Y/N in a bikini, but I guess with the alcohol in my system I had the courage to stare more and actually talk to her and get her to ‘dance’ with me.

The music was loud and sexual, her ass was against my crotch as we danced (grinded) on each other. The party was in full swing and everything just felt amazing. Until the next morning… I woke up to my arms around a naked y/n, and a massive hangover between my ears. My head pounded and my ears were ringing, but there was a gorgeous girl in my arms so I can’t complain.

:-:-:-:

Mid August, when all the partying is done, and we relax for a few weeks before going back to our respective cities where we play hockey and/or go to school. I’m sat on a devils beach chair with y/n on my lap, Luke’s on a Michigan one, Quinn’s on a Canucks one, Cole’s on a USA one and Trevor I guess bought a Ducks one for some reason and he’s on that.

:-:-:-:-:

Ever since that summer, the summer of 2020, THEE summer of 2020, i haven’t been happier. I have my dream girl, my dream job, any parents, siblings and friends are all healthy and happy with where they are in life and my life is honestly perfect right now and as I said, I can’t be happier!

[darkromanceenthusiast]

Gabriel (2014) x reader

I cannot find this characters last name to save my motherfucking life

Contains: Beach scene re-write, reader tries to turn Gabe down because they know they can’t help him but ultimately gives in, might write more idk, cursing, fluff, and brief mentions of a knife, reader is referred to as “wife” but otherwise GN, reader loves him so much, heart hurts.

“What the fuck?Jesus Christ!” You jumped up from the dead sleep and bed as you saw the dark haired man behind you, it took a few seconds for it to click in your mind you knew him.

“Surprise.” He says, an adorable smile on his face, his eyes are bright and happy as he stares up at me.

“Gabe, what the fuck are you doing here? You just can't get into my bed and surprise me?” I say, still freaking out, it had been years since I’ve seen him and now he’s just here.

“Yes, I can. That's what I just did. I just...” he trailed off and I looked over him, he was fidgeting with his hands a bit.

“How did you get here?” I ask, sitting back down on the side of the bed.

“I drove.” He answered simply as if the question was that simple.

“No, I mean, why are you here? How did you find me?” I ask, crossing my arms over my chest, he still had that fucking smile on his face, the one that made me want to hug him but I fought it.

“You look amazing. I missed you so much.” He says as he goes to stroke my face, I take a step back and his face looks as if I just kicked a puppy as he tugs on the sleeves of his sweater.

“Gabe, what the fuck? This is so fucking weird...What are you doing?” I ask

“You know, I thought you'd be a little happier to see me.” He answers, clearly upset that my reaction isn’t jumping for joy.

“You just broke into my house and got into bed with me while I was sleeping. Obviously I'm a little scared.” You explained as you paced a bit, how would you explain this to anyone? Does Gabe’s family know where he is?

“You think I'm scary?” His sad voice pulls you from your spiraling thoughts. I sigh and look at him, sitting on my bed with his brown curls poking out from under his red beanie, his blue eyes look scared and worried, I notice the way his sweater is baggy on him and wonder if he’s eating well and I can see his bottom lip trembling and I have to look away.

“No. I'm not...I'm not saying you're scary. I'm just trying to figure out what the fuck is going on.” I answer and he perks up a bit, he stands and comes closer to me, holding out one of his bruised hands.

“Let's go to the beach.” He says, his smile making my heart melt.

“Gabe… I don’t think that’s a good idea.” I said softly. All I knew was Gabe is unpredictable and I hadn’t heard from him in so long. I was scared, this guy tracked me down and who knows what he’s capable of now, we aren’t silly kids anymore.

“I have a plan. I decided on my birthday. There was a bunch of fucking crazy people eating my cake, and a bunch of fat nurses telling me happy birthday as if they gave a shit, and I decided right there that I should be with you. 'Cause that's what families do. You know, normal families, they spend time together and be happy.” He explained with a smile and my heart sank, I wasn’t what this man wanted, I was just what he thought he wanted but I knew I couldn’t actually give him the help or happiness he deserves.

“Gabe, we're not a family. I... I thought you were living at your mom's house.” You said as your mind raced, crazy people eating his cake? Nurses? Then it clicked, Gabe’s family put him in an institution… you remembered his obsessive behavior that started shortly before he disappeared all those years ago.

“No. Shit. I'm getting ahead of myself. We-We gotta go down to the beach.” He said, this time grabbing your hand and pulling you towards the door, you fight with him a bit on it and he gets desperate.

“Gabe, it's freezing cold outside. I'm not gonna go to the beach.” You say, hoping to convince him you didn’t need to leave the house as his grasp tightened.

“No, see, you're getting it all confused. I just started thinking, what would they want me to do? Like what would a normal, boring person do in this situation? So I just started showering and washing all my stuff and smiling all the time... All that shit that they think is important, that makes 'em feel safe, you know? I just started acting like everyone else.” He said, you could see tears starting to form in his eyes, his throat tightened as he talked and you realized if this man cries you’re done for… you just can’t do it… seeing tears running down his cheeks will kill you.

“Gabe...” you whispered, hoping to calm him down.

“Like I'm supposed to act. Like-Like... Like an adult.” He said pleadingly

“What are you talking about?” You asked, your guard lowering a bit,

“And I asked them if I could come home f-for the weekend to surprise you, and they said yes. They said yes, so here I am. Come on, I need to ask you something, but it's gotta be on the beach.” He pleaded and you slowly relented, you let him, it was going okay until there was a sound on the other side of the house and pulled out a large kitchen knife, you felt your heart jump into your throat before it settled in your stomach like a sinking pit.

“Gabe, what the fuck is that?” You asked quietly, your voice barely above a whisper.

“What? It's... It's just in case.” He said as he turned to you, the knife was gripped in his hand and his eyes looked a bit wild as he gave me a small smile.

“Just in case of what?” I ask, keeping my voice soft,

“In case of this. In case of someone coming… trying to keep us apart. Hey, it's self-defense. It's just protection, you know?” He explained softly and I looked at him concerned, why would he feel he needed self-defense to take me to the beach?

“Gabe, you're not going to be hurt.” I say as I reach slowly for the knife.

“Of course they are!” He raised his voice slightly and jerked the knife away from me, I put my hands up and nodded slowly,

“Fine… okay… let's go to the beach.” I say and he immediately calms down grabbing my hand as he leads me down to the beach, we walk in silence for a while before he speaks,

“You okay? You're freezing.” He says as he pulls off his coat and wraps it around me, I smile to myself softly when he does, I loved Gabe but I knew he needed more than I could ever reliably give him.

“Yeah.” I answered quickly.

“I'm-I'm sorry I had to do all that, but it's gonna be okay. I promise.” He said as we stood near the edge of the water.

“What are you doing? You can't act like this, Gabriel. You can't do this. This isn't okay.” I say, a bit worried about the knife in his pocket.

“You know you're the only one that's allowed to call me that? You and Dad. 'Cause you're the only ones that really love me. Do you know that?” He said, a small smile on his face as he squinted against the sun, his nose crinkling in a way I adored,

“Gabe...” I started, unsure of what to say,

“Do you remember when we got married?” He asked suddenly and I thought back to the summer we were kids, we had met on the beach we were now standing on, he was the cutest boy you had ever seen and my first love… until he disappeared.

“Ofcourse I remember… what about it?” I ask as he takes a small step towards me,

“I've just been having these flashbacks, like déjà vu or whatever, of when we got married. Do you remember? You kissed me on the beach, like where everyone could see.And then I said I love you. I whispered in your ear. Do you remember what you did? You grabbed my hand and pulled me into the ocean. And we went under and I proposed, and you said yes. Do you remember that? It was amazing. See? There it is.” He explains and I can feel the smile on my face of remembering those simpler times with him.

“Yeah….Holy shit.” I say softly,

“They've been... telling me that I'm a piece of shit. That I'm worthless.” He says as he looks off to the side, he’s still fidgeting with his hands as he does,

“Who tells you that?” I ask, genuine concern for him,

“But then I've been thinking about that moment when we got married, and-and I realize, you know, I'm...I'm not worthless. I'm pretty... I'm okay.” He says with a crooked smile, he looks at me with wide eyes,

“Of course you are.” I answer, Gabe has always been a soft guy, when his temper is under control.

“I mean, as long as...As long as I have you, I'm okay. As long as you love me, I'm fine. Yeah, I think I knew even then you were gonna be my wife.” He said and it’s my turn to look at him wide-eyed,

“Gabe, what are you talking about?” I ask as I can feel a cold sweat break out despite the cold weather,

“Shit, wait. Wait, hold on.” He says as he starts digging in his pockets and I start to shake a bit, I can’t handle this, I can’t do this, I can’t break his heart like this… I can’t hurt him.

“No, my... Gabe, what are you talking about?Please don't do this.” I pleaded softly, I prayed he wouldn’t do this to me, that he wouldn’t force me to rip my own heart out to hurt him. I watch as he gets excited as he looks down at the rind in his hand.

“This is how you’re supposed to do it, right?” He says as he takes a step back and gets down on one knee and looks up at me, I’m unsure of if his lips or hands are shaking more.

“No, don't...Don't do this, Gabe. No, no, no, no, no, no, no.” I beg as I feel my chest tighten, I can’t hurt him but I can’t help him.

“(YFN), will you marry me?” He asks, his voice is shaky but overall confident,

“Oh My God.” I cover my mouth with my hand as I stare down at him,

“Like not kid stuff underwater, but-but for real. Aboveground, in front of God and everyone else. I want to be your husband. P-please? Say something?” He says, he begins getting desperate towards the end and all I can do is stare at him,

“Gabe, you're not... I don’t think… I’m not the same person I was five years ago, I-I’ve changed.” I say gently, hoping to talk some sense into him,

“No. No, no, no. No, I just...I just need you.Just you.” He says as he stands, the ring still held out to me as he stares into my eyes and I look away, I can’t bear it. I can’t bear seeing the pain on his face.

“Gabe, No.” I say as tears begin to stream down my face, not being able to hold it in any longer.

“No, don't. Don't, don't, don't. Don't...Don't be like them. Just... Please.I just need...We can live forever.And be happy.” He begged and I sobbed, burying my face in my hands as hot tears dropped down my red face, one of his hands cupped my cheek, wiping away my tears and I push it away.

“No. I ca...I can't help you. You need...You need real help. You need doctors and you need medicine...and you need people who know how to help you. I don't know how to help you.” I explain and he shakes his head and holds the ring out to me again.

“But...But I love you.” He says and I feel as if I might pass out,

“I love you too that’s why I hate that I can’t help you.” I say and tears begin to stream down his face aswell, he is still clutching the ring tightly,

“I'm just...I'm so full of love.I just... I just need you to love me back.” He says softly and I shake slightly,

“I do love you, Gabe.” I say and he looks back up into my eyes,

“Then p-please… just say you’ll marry me… I’ll be good. I’ll be a good husband.” He pleads and my heart sinks lower.

I can’t.

I can’t

But I have too.

I need too.

Who else would love him as much as I do?

Who else wouldn’t just call the fucking cops?

“Gabe… I… fuck… i-if I agree to marry you. If we do this you have to take your meds… you have to continue getting treatment and help…” I say slowly, choosing my words carefully. Gabe nodded as he stepped closer to me.

“I-I swear… I promise… anything for you.” He says eagerly. I nod slowly and hold my hand out to him, he smiles widely and slips the ring on my finger before pulling me in for a kiss. I couldn’t stop myself from pulling him closer. The fabric of his sweater in a death grip between my fingers as I cry into the crook of his neck. I love him, I’m going to help him. It takes a while before we pull apart.

“See? I knew it… We’re going to be so happy.” He says, my face cupped in his hands and I smile softly up at him. We will need to work things out, we will need to call his family and let them know he’s safe and where he is, I’ll also have to plead for him not to be sent back to the mental hospital, but as of right now I’m here on a cold ass beach with the one man I’ve loved since childhood with his ring weighing down my finger as he embrace each-other, all the other problems can wait.

[azurejacques]

OK spoilery follow up to my last post on Somewhere Beyond the Sea- you have been warned!!

First off- I must admit that it was, quite genuinely, not until I read the acknowledgements that I realized that Janine Rowder is a stand-in for JK Rowling. I swear I use my brain sometimes, I just have a tendency to turn off the analytical part while I’m consuming media I’m enjoying.

Relatedly, I absolutely love TJ for not holding anything back at the end and calling JKR the fuck out, and calling himself the Anti-JKR; and as well for dedicating the book to the trans community.

It’s been a while since I read THITCS, so it took me a sec to remember everyone and everything, but omg still like Linus proposing to Arthur so quickly- 😭 my boy has come so far in his character development. And oh my god their wedding scene in the epilogue was so well done and so beautiful; it has that classic TJ Klune humor and I love the way the kids just ignore ceremony and tackle Arthur once he walks up to the podium.

The epilogue as a whole was so well-done, I love to see Marsyas blooming as a haven for magical folk and all people who see their vision, it works beautifully with the allegories for queerness and other oppressed minorities represented by magical people in this series; it reminds the reader that in hope there in strength, and we too can overcome and pave the path towards a better world.

And god, Arthur’s progress in this book was so good to watch unfold. For all the work and healing and processing he’d already done, there was much left to be done (and still is), and the way he (and the other grownups) not only helps the children, but they help him in turn is really well done; for example, Phee asking him to fly with her as the Phoenix, and everyone (Linus, Lucy) caring for him and helping him during and after his breakdown after hearing Marblemaw talking to Rowder on the beach. The amount of love, in small displays and great, is incredible in this book.

And Lucy, omg, I love him so much, his growth, too, is amazing to witness and he’s just so adorable, latching on to Linus and not wanting to go down after being picked up 😭

And I’ve kinda mentioned this before, but the ways in which the children begin to establish and express their autonomy is so well done, especially with Sal’s growth as a person. From being reserved and unspeaking (at least to those he’s not comfy with) due to trauma inflicted on him, to a brave teenager who will stand up for his siblings and make sure even his own fathers know when they’re wrong or don’t have the same perspective he or the kids in general do (e.g. the intersection of his identities as being both a magical person and a Black person, a perspective mainly limited to him (Zoe too, but also kinda not bc she hasn’t had as much interaction w humanity in the last… long while until recently)).

Such a great book

WAIT ZOE!! Omg I loved her arc and story in this book!! I love the way her character is done and how her status as protector of the island is highlighted and then it’s revealed that she is, in fact, Queen. It almost feels allegorical for how the movements and communities we have were built upon the work and literal ground of Black and Indigenous communities here in America (and especially Black trans folk!). Marsyas is her people’s land, and despite everything done to her and her family and people, she, with the help of her newfound allies, creates a new home for those who have been hurt and oppressed like her.

[citrusrei]

In Every Lifetime.

Joel Miller x Reader MDNI 18+ Summary You fell for a man before the world went to hell. Nearly 20 years later, he’s there again in a different lifetime. Genre: a lil angst if you look at it right, Smut, fluff TLOU!Universe Word Count: 10.7k Warnings: Post-Outbreak!Joel, aggressive situations, a couple of hasslers, smut (piv ~unprotected~, fingering, hand jobs, creampies (again), slight breeding kink maybe? vocal dirty joel, mutual masturbation), age gap (14 years, joel is older duhh) lots of good Ol’ soft Joel, slightly possessive joel (again cause i love him), insecure joel :( happy ending cause my heart couldn’t take a sad one  *please imagine whichever Joel you’d like whether it’s pedro’s or videogame joel cause I pictured both at certain points.*

AN: This is truly one of my fav things I’ve ever written lol Joel is so babygirl in it i’m crine. also this can be read as a one shot if u haven’t read the first one~ (but read the first one hehe)

pt. 1 

listen to these as you read~

Life after the apocalypse was nothing anyone could have anticipated. Before the outbreak, you’d seen countless movies about zombies or the undead, or infected. But this was different. It wasn’t a virus, or a bio-weapon used to control the population. A fungus. A fungus that just so happened to mutate and create this global panic. 

The night it happened you were with a friend of yours testing out a new club downtown. Everything was great. The drinks were cheap and tasty, the music was amazing, the vibe was just immaculate. You and your friend Holly danced, drank, and sang the night away. A little before 11:00pm is when things got strange. The music changed, slower now. Holly asked if you wanted another drink to which you declined, but followed her to the bar anyways.

“Another sex on the beach please!” she urged.

“You’re addicted to those, ya know?” You laughed, shaking your head.

She laughed with you, “I am not! They’re just so delicious I can’t help myself.”

As the bartender handed Holly her drink, you sent Joel a quick text asking him how his birthday was. You’d been taking things slow since the night you and him finally hooked up. He had admitted his feelings for you and you were right there with him. The both of you decided to give each other a shot. You had wanted to see him today but he had told you he was working a double and wouldn’t be home until late so you had planned something with him later in the week.  

- 10:45pm Joel <3: Got home a couple hours ago. Sarah wanted to watch a movie and knocked out. Lil girl can’t run with the big dogs.

- 10:45pm Me: lol hopefully she got to see at least a bit of it! Holly dragged me to this club tonight and I’m kind of over it. Would rather be in bed with you rn 😉

- 10:46pm Joel <3: You got no idea how much I'd like that bout now darlin. You got me all weekend.

- 10:46pm Me: You better promise me that, Joel Miller!

- 10:46pm Joel <3: Promise.  

- 10:49pm Joel <3: Tommy just called me. He’s in the county jail. I gotta go get him... text you in a bit.

- 10:51pm Me: You’re kidding...... jesus Tommy. But ok. Text me once you get him. Talk soon <3

You slid your phone into your bra and sighed, not surprised that Tommy found himself in a predicament like that. He was so headstrong and stubborn. You wondered what had happened to him. 

“Everything okay?” Holly asked. You nodded but still you were unsure. Your eyes floated to a couple on the dance floor as your eyebrows knitted together. The woman began to twitch, her limbs snapping in different, odd directions. It continued a moment. People around her began to notice and step away, creating a circle around her. The man she was with held on to her as an attempt to keep her steady. She fell to the ground, her body still moving slightly. As this happened, the man pulled his cellphone out, most likely trying to call 911. In the blink of an eye, she rose to her feet, jumping on to the man in front of her and sinking her teeth into his neck. It physically startled you as you latched onto Holly’s arm. “We need to leave.” You said, eyes never leaving the woman, the crowd now starting to panic. People dispersed in a matter of moments. You could see someone trying to pry the woman off the man who laid what looked to be lifeless on the ground. That person suffered the same fate. She was on him in an instant.

Holly looked around and realized what was going on before pushing you towards the door. Once outside, everyone was scrambling. And not just people from the club but the man across the street, locking his bail bond business up or people fleeing from a nearby diner a few doors down. It was mania. Your heart was pounding in your chest as you looked around a moment, not exactly sure where to go or what to do.  

C’mon, ___! We gotta get to my car!” You followed Holly down the street to where she had her car parked when suddenly a horde of people ran by, being chased by what seemed to be someone covered in blood. Mucous and viscera gargled from his mouth as the sounds echoed through the street. The man dove to an older woman in front of him and began his attack. Holly screamed at the event which cause the man to turn his attention to her. He swung his arm out for her, grabbing her wrist and pulling her forward. You leapt into action, grabbing her body and pulling her back to you with such force, you could feel her back pop.

“Come on, run!” You screamed. The two of you sprinted to her car, not even minding the fact that both your heels had broken off in the process. She started the ignition and sped off, driving anywhere besides here.    

“What the fuck is happening?!” She yelled, checking her rearview mirror to make sure no one was following.

“I’m not sure. I need to call Joel.” You pulled your phone out and dialed his number, but it went straight to voicemail. “Fuck!” You called a few more people, Tommy, your mom, your sister. No one answered.  

“I gotta get home, ___. My-My son... I left him with the babysitter.” Holly cried, tears flowing now as she thought of all the possibilities of what could be happening to her child.

“Okay- It’s okay. We’ll go get him.”      

You and Holly sped to her home, not minding the speed limit as literally no one was. You both got to her house without a hitch, thankfully. However, upon arriving you noticed the door was wide open. Holly’s eyes widened.

“Stay here. I’m going to go in.” She breathed, shaking so bad she could barely unbuckle her seatbelt.

You nodded, checking your phone again and seeing you had a missed call from Tommy. You called him back immediately. It rang once, “Tommy! Hello? Can you hear me?”

“___! I can hear you but barely.” He was staticky. The call was barely hanging on. “Where are you? Are you safe?”

Tears began to prick your eyes as he spoke, his voice comforting you. “Yeah, I’m okay. I’m with Holly. We’re getting her son. What is happening? Are you with Joel? Is Sarah okay?”

Tommy sighed, “I’m not sure. It’s a mad house. Av-oid downtown bu-t drive west. We’re over that w-ay. I was with Joel and Sarah b-ut I got sep-arate-d. Meet us p-ast the theater o-n the west side, okay? I got to g-” Suddenly the call dropped, showing no signal. At the same time Holly ran out with her son RJ in her arms. She set him in the back seat and jumped into hers, her tires squealing as she backed out of her drive way. Just as she pulled out, the babysitter came running out of her front door, growling animalistically. Your eyes flashed from her to RJ, checking for any wounds which you found none. He was bawling, completely terrified.   

“Hey, Tommy said drive to the west side past the theater and we can meet them there!” You said, climbing into the back seat to comfort RJ. You cradled the 2-year-old and hushed his sobs. He clung to you for dear life as you rocked him back and forth. You drove just outside of Austin, avoiding the mobs of people. Many people had the same idea as you but the flow of traffic stayed decent, only stopping every so often. The three of you rode in silence until a blockade came into view. It looked like the military was stopping people and directing them east. The exact opposite of where you needed to go. As Holly pulled up to the officers, they signaled her to roll her window down.

“How many in the car?” he asked, shining his flashlight in the vehicle.

“Just us three.” She answered.

He nodded, typing something on a tablet he held, “Okay, head east 15 minutes from here. There’s a larger Military presence over there and they’re taking survivors. I’ll add 2 women and a child to the list so they know you are coming.”

“No-No, we need to head west! We have people we need to meet!” You said quickly. The officer scowled and shined his light back to you and RJ who had calmed down into sniffles.

“Sorry ma’am but you can only go east. West side of Austin is under lockdown and no one can leave or enter. You go east.” He finished, walking to the car behind us.

You set RJ down next to you, buckling him in before returning to the front seat. “We need to find Joel and Tommy. We can’t go East.”

Holly shook her head, turning her tear-soaked cheeks to you. “No, we’re going east. I have RJ to think of, ___. If Joel and Tommy are smart, they’re already there waiting for you.” You sighed, defeatedly. She was right. The Miller brothers were very resourceful. It was a possibility. Maybe they were already at the safe zone. Same with your family. You nodded, your heart twisting in your chest as you agreed with her and then you were off.

It was a 15-minute drive but you could see the lights and helicopters before you even got there. It was massive and there were hundreds of people and tents popped up everywhere. It would be forever before you found anyone. The officers let you all in, setting you and Holly into a medical tent with a few other people. RJ slept in his mother's arms as the Doctors and Soldiers came in and out of each tent. Your leg bounced with anxiety. You glanced around the tent and around the area in general. People sobbed and cried and yelled, asking where their loved ones were, or what was going on, and saying they wanted to go home. You couldn’t help but to agree. You wanted nothing more than to go home and go to sleep and wake up and have this all be dream. 

Some time passed before the fedra soldiers came back with water and blankets. They said they were transporting people to quarantine zones as soon as possible. You wanted to fight back and say you had people to find, but everyone was saying that. So you sat and obliged.  

Finally, the doctors made their way into your tent, checking on the other habitants first. They did a full body check on the young girl sitting on the cot. She was clean. Next was the mother, she didn’t speak any English. She cried to the doctor, “Por favor, doctor. No estoy enfermo. Quiero irme a la casa.” The doctor just looked at her, checking her body over anyways. She cried and cried and your heart broke for her. It made you sick. You wanted to go home too, desperately. You wanted your mom or your sister. Or Joel. The doctor finished his search and nodded to the soldier. The soldier came over to the woman and dragged her away. Her daughter screamed on the cot as they subdued her. You couldn’t look anymore, it hurt too much. You averted your gaze back to Holly and RJ who was awake now, rambling in her arms. She raised her hand to wipe the hair out of his eyes, and that’s when you saw it. Your eyes widened as you noticed the three scratch marks on her wrist.

         Present Day.                                                                                                    It was fall now. Mid-October. The cold decided to make an early appearance and you were thankful for the older couple you’d stumbled upon a few weeks ago. They’d stocked you up with a good amount of food and a thick winter coat. The old man had been saying it was going to be a Winter with a sharp bite and offered you the jacket. Who were you to deny an old man and his wisdom? They let you stay there a couple days. Maybe they had been too trusting. You could have easily killed them while they slept a few doors down from you. You’d even thought about it. They had plenty of food and a barn with a couple cows and chickens. You could just take it if you had really wanted to. You hated that those were thoughts you had. They were showing you such kindness and trust, hell, the older woman even baked you a pie. A fresh baked pie?! It had been probably 20 years since you’d had one of those.

The course of the last 20 years moved in a blur. From you being split from anyone you’d known and sent to a QZ in Illinois, to that said QZ being destroyed by fireflies only 5 years of being there. You’ve had to do horrible, heinous things to survive; which you hated yourself for. You searched and searched for anyone familiar. Someone you’d gone to school with, babysat, or maybe a neighbor. Anyone. And that never happened.

As you scrambled for a place to find shelter, dark storm clouds rolled in, bringing a late fall storm. The trees all shades of burnt sienna and burgundy as their leaves fell to the ground, leaving the smell of their decay lingering in the air. It was a comfort to you. You’d always been a fall type of person and being out here in Wyoming, it was almost magical. You adored the whip of the wind across your skin as the air became colder, a few drops of rain kissing your cheeks. In the distance, you could see a small shack, clearly (hopefully) abandoned. You trudged on forth, minding the ache in your knees. You’d been walking for a while now, and you definitely weren’t 22 anymore.  

As the shack came into a better view, the rain began falling harder. You picked up speed, not wanting to be completely soaked and thankfully mother nature allowed you to reach your destination before it really pelted down. Once inside you looked around and no surprise, it was empty. It was a small, dusty home. Only having a living area, kitchen and bathroom with a bedroom off to the side. You sat your backpack and rifle on the couch as you sat next to it, reclining and stretching into the cushion. You were so comfortable as you listened to the rain patter against the roof. The room was dark and cold, you couldn’t help but close your eyes and drift off for a bit.

You weren’t sure how much time had passed, but when you woke up it was still raining. You stretched, shaking off any remaining drowsiness but when you went to reach for your backpack a gun cocked at the back of your head. You froze, raising your hands in compliance.

“Stay fucking still.” The voice said. You blinked, annoyed with yourself that you let your guard down. “Don’t plan on going anywhere.” You retorted.

You sat there a few moments before another voice spoke, “Hey, kid! What are you doing?” The gun’s nozzle stayed firmly planted against your skull, “She was in here asleep! I was getting the upper hand!” The other person came up to your assailant and pushed the gun away before stepping in front of you, hand at her gun on her hip.

“Who are you?” She asked. She was average height, darker skin tone and had these beautiful braids in her hair. She seemed a bit younger than you but had to have been in her mid to late thirties.

“Doesn’t matter, I’m just passing by.” You sighed, not really in the mood for an interrogation. I mean, you’d just woken up.

“Why are you in the area?” she asked, probing further. The other person, a young girl, went to stand next to her, eyes locked tightly onto you. Did you really come off as that threatening? The girl had to have been 13-14 no older than that. Maybe 15. You couldn’t really tell.  

“I told you. Just passing by.”  

“Maria, she doesn’t really look like much of a threat...” The younger girl hushed. The older woman, now known as Maria, sighed. “What’s your name?”  

“If I tell you, will you let me leave?” You asked, your annoyance increasing.

“It’s pouring still. You want to leave in the middle of a storm?” The younger one remarked.

You sighed, “It’s ___. My name is ___. I don’t have any intention of hurting or robbing or killing any of you. Just needed a place to stay while it rained. Is this your place? I didn’t mean to intrude.”

Maria shook her head. “No, it’s not. We were out on a hunt and it started pouring. Saw this place and had the same idea as you, I suppose.” Maria relaxed, removing her hand from her hip and settling down on a chair opposite from you. “I’m Maria. This is Ellie.”  

Ellie scoffed, “Maria! We could have used fake names!” You smiled softly, loving the kick-back. Maria just shrugged, relaxing further into her chair. “Where you from, ___?”  

Your eyebrow quirked as you thought of an answer, “Good question. Kind of everywhere. Midwest originally. Stayed in the Chicago QZ after the outbreak. Didn’t last long. Been traveling since.” Which was mostly true. You were in Texas of course for a while, and there had been groups you stayed with since the QZ fell, but none of them worked out in the end.

“Why Wyoming now?” She pondered.

“Well, just kind of found myself here. Was with a few people and that ended. Now? Well...”

“What happened to them?” Ellie asked.

“Doesn’t matter. Looks like the rain is letting up. Am I free to go?”  

Maria sighed as she hesitated for a moment. Ellie watched her intently not quite sure where she was going. After some time, Maria spoke. “Alright. You can go if you’d like. Want to follow us though? We have a town a bit north from here. Could set you up a place to stay for a few nights, get you some food, a shower...?”

“A shower?” You asked incredulously. It’d been so long since you’d had a proper bath and you knew you needed one desperately.

She chuckled, nodding.  

“A hot shower too!” Ellie chimed in.

You hesitated a moment, weighing your options. One, you could go and have an amazing shower and meal and sleep in a safe place... maybe even on a bed. Or two, it was a trap and they were going to sell you off or maybe even kill you and cook you. If it were the latter, they probably would have killed you by now, so you decided. Fuck it.

“You have a deal.”

You followed Maria and Ellie a few miles until a rather large town came into view. You could see the area had power as the sun had begun to set. Lights twinkled throughout the homes and your heart almost got caught in your throat. “You guys have electricity?”  

Maria nodded, “Yep. We have a dam nearby that give us power and stuff.”

You all walked a bit more before finally reaching the town. It was massive considering things. As you approached the guarded gate, you could hear people chattering and kids laughing. What were you about to get yourself into?  

Maria raised her hand at the guard who stood at his post, signaling for them to open the gate. As they did, a man rushed to Maria’s side pulling her into a tight hug. You didn’t pay much attention to it as you peered into the town, eyes wide.

“Where have you been? It’s been hours! I was worried sick!” He spoke. Maria rolled her eyes, “I don’t know if you knew this but it was raining cats and dogs about an hour ago? Ellie and I found a little shack and waited it out. We found her too.” She said, pointing towards you.

Your attention was brought back to Maria and as you looked to the man in front of her, your eyes widened even further. His face matched yours as you both stared at each other.

“T-Tommy...? No fucking way.” You stood there like you’d seen a ghost. Tears pricked your eyes and you blinked them away immediately, scared that if you looked away, he’d disappear. Tommy rushed to you, pulling you into a tight hug, squeezing the air out of your lungs. You clung back to him, letting the tears fall freely.  

“___… I can’t believe it.” He breathed into the side of your head, bringing his hand up to your hair.

“I’m guessing you know each other?” Ellie asked.

The two of you embraced a moment longer before he let go of you, keeping you at arm's length. “What... where... I can’t even formulate a sentence right now.” He said, tears of his own stinging the corners of his eyes. You laughed, biting back more tears that dared to spill, “I’m in the same boat, Miller. It’s been so long.”

Your heart was pounding as you reunited with your former friend, just stuck in a  state of shock that after all these years, you’d run into someone like Tommy Miller. What are the odds?

“This your place, Tommy?”

He nodded, “Yeah, Maria and I oversee things for the most part. Come on, let’s get some food in ya.”

You followed Tommy, Maria, and Ellie through the town until you reached the mess hall in the middle of it. As you walked through the streets, people greeted Tommy and Maria. They were doing their duties or relaxed on their porches, enjoying their space. Enjoying their life. Their guards totally let down. It was a sight to see. Children played with each other, splashing in the fresh rain puddles and chasing each other down in a game of tag. It was almost unreal.

The four of you entered the mess hall, the smell of fresh cooked food entering your nostrils. You’d been living off canned beans and peas for the past few weeks so your stomach was instantly rumbling. Tommy sat you at a table while he went and grabbed you a bowl of chili and bread. You could have cried as you ate your first bite; it was hot and fresh. “Is it good?” he laughed. All you could do was nod, stuffing your mouth with another spoonful.

After you ate, Tommy and you caught up to date as best as you could. Ellie and Maria had wandered off somewhere else leaving the two of you to yourselves. “So, you and Maria?” Tommy smiled, “Yeah. Couple years now. Even married her.”  

Your eyes widened, smiling at your longtime friend, “No shit! Wow, who would have thought Tommy Miller to be married.”  

He laughed, “Yeah, yeah. Such a shock, is it now?” You just laughed back, looking down at your empty bowl.

“What about you? Anyone special over the years?”  

You rolled your eyes jokingly, “Maybe a few here and there. Nothing serious though.”

“Don’t know why. You’re still a looker.” He poked.

“There’s the Tommy I know and love.” You grinned, pushing his shoulder playfully, “Not everyone has the luxury of living in a town like this one and meeting the love of their life.”  

Tommy leaned back in his chair, agreeing with you. “Well, maybe it’s sudden but you know how I am. You know you have a place here with us. We’ll set you up with a lil’ house. Get you on the board for some jobs. Wasn’t a doubt in my mind when I seen you out there that I was gonna let you leave again.”

“You gonna hold me hostage, Tommy?” You laughed.

“Might have to.”

You’d be a fool to pass it up, you knew it. But you were nervous. How could you adjust to a life of ‘normalcy’ after being essentially feral for so many years.

“Mind if I think on it a bit?” Tommy shook his head, “Take all the time you need. In the meantime, I got someone you might want to see.”

Your eyebrows knitted together in thought. Who could he have been talking about? And then it hit you. In the excitement of everything that had been happening in the last couple of hours, you hadn’t even considered the idea that Joel could be there. Your heart started pounding in your chest again, butterflies swarming in your stomach as the thought of seeing him entered your mind. You’d convinced yourself that he’d died years ago. That both him and Tommy had died and Tommy was in fact here before you. It’s been 20 years and the idea of seeing Joel Miller still sent you spiraling. “He isn’t…” you began. Tommy smiled at you as he radioed someone over the talkie, “Anyone got eyes on Joel?”  

Your heart hammered so hard Tommy could probably hear it. He had to have been pulling your leg. You started becoming self-conscious. You hadn’t showered in weeks, you were grimy, you had aged. You couldn’t help but laugh to yourself because when was the last time you’d had to worry about that?

“He just got in from patrol, you need him?” A man said on the other side of the radio.

“Yeah, send him to the mess. Got someone he needs to see.”

“Roger that.”

Tommy made small talk while you both waited for Joel to arrive. You couldn’t process anything though. You were suddenly so nervous. How was he going to react? Would he be just so happy and cry? Yeah right, that was so anti-Joel it was laughable. Would he just be nonchalant? Like, wow. Been a while. Nice to see you. You couldn’t even predict it. Tommy could sense you were anxious and placed a hand on your shoulder to calm you down. “Hey… it’s Joel. You know him. No need to be nervous.”

He was right. You did know him. But the keyword was did. You knew him 20 years ago. You’ve changed since then so of course he’s changed as well. What if he didn’t even remember you? God, you’d be so embarrassed. “Y-You’re right. I’m just in my head I guess.”

“Well get out of it. I think you’ll be surprised. Want a drink?” He offered.

“God, yes. What do you have?”

“Well,” he began “probably don’t got those fruity little drinks you used to like but I can sure get you a glass of whiskey.”

You laughed, exhaling a breath you didn’t even know you were holding, “Okay. Whatever you got.”

Tommy returned with the drink quickly. You downed it as soon as it hit the table, the whiskey burned the back of your throat and chest as it went down.

“Still can’t shoot whiskey, huh?” Tommy teased. Your face scrunched up into a look of disgust, “Fuck, guess not. That’s awful.”  

Tommy opened his mouth to say something but was distracted by the mess doors opening. There he was. Joel Miller in all his glory. Tommy walked up to the man, patting him on the back before striking up a conversation. You were out of earshot so you couldn’t hear anything but you weren’t sure you wanted to. If you were anxious before, you didn’t even know what to call how you felt right now. You felt like you could throw up on the spot, but maybe that was the whiskey talking. He was the same. A bit aged, but still Joel. His hair was grayer, bit longer too. Still scraggly, but it’s always suited him. Maybe he was a bit more muscular but you couldn’t exactly tell cause of all the layers he had on. You stirred in your seat as your heartbeat went a thousand miles per minute. He was here, and he was alive.

Tommy led Joel over to the bar and poured him a glass of amber liquid, maybe in a way to prepare him. Joel took a sip, not noticing that his brother had signaled you over. You stood from your chair, stomach in your ass as you made your way over to them. Nothing could prepare you for this. You had half a mind to run out and never look back. But your heart yearned for him, even if it were just to be in his presence, even just to say ‘Hi’.  

You reached both men, standing at the chair behind Joel who had his back facing you.  

After a moment of you trying to talk yourself up, you spoke. “I’ll have another one, Tommy.” You said, sliding your glass over to him. Joel turned around, finally aware of your presence. His eyes scanned up your body until they met your face.  

A chill ran up Joel’s spine as he heard a voice ask for another drink. It was a voice he knew all too well. One he hadn’t heard in 20 years, besides in his dreams. His eyes met yours for a moment, until you turned away under his gaze. No words were said and honestly you didn’t feel like they needed to be. He stood from his chair and faced you fully, eyes shimmering behind the tired look on his face. Almost like he was renewed.  

“Hi, Joel.” You managed to get out, your words finally finding you again. Confidence found you too as you looked the man in the eye. He sputtered a moment, not quite sure what to say before he decided nothing was best. He wrapped his big arms around your frame, pulling you in for a hug that was even tighter than Tommy’s. You hugged back, gripping to the back of his flannel. He smelled the same with just a hint of something new. That warm, musky Joel smell that reminded you of cedar and whiskey with the added sent of pine. You could have gotten drunk off it. Not in a million lifetimes could you have imagined the day would come where you were reunited with him. You had to have been dreaming. More tears spilled and you cursed yourself, tired of all the waterworks.

Joel held on to you for what seemed like an eternity. You didn’t mind at all. In fact, you welcomed it. It’d been too long since you’d been touched in general you hadn’t realized how much you’d been craving something like this, let alone from him.

“I’ll give the two of you a moment.” Tommy said, knocking on the bar and walking over to Ellie who was coincidentally walking up to you all and pulling her away with him, “Oh c’mon, Tommy!” She yelped.

Joel finally pulled away, but still keeping you at bay, “I don’t... I don’t understand. Where did you come from?” He was breathless. He kept thinking it was a dream, you being here. He didn’t want to wake up.

“Well, that’s a long story,” You laughed, “Most recently from Colorado. But it doesn’t matter. I don’t even know how we’re both here to be honest.”

Joel smiled down to you, his grip tightening, “It’s kind of unreal, right? I kind of.... thought-”

“That I died? Trust me, when I saw Tommy, it was like I’d seen a ghost.” You recalled, eyes softening as it really hit you that Joel was here in front of you. Unchanged, just slightly grayer.

“I-I looked for you... For years. I kind of went mad about it for a while. So much happened that night.” His face twisting into a look of discomfort as he remembered the night things started.  

The two of you sat and spoke for hours, catching up on everything. Joel told you about Sarah and how Tommy stopped that soldier. You cried when he spoke about her; he teared up too. You told him about Holly and how she’d been taken that night. How you looked after RJ until he got sick one winter when he was 8. He didn’t make it either. He told you about the Boston QZ and people he’d met along the way. How he met Ellie and how that went down. You did the same. A lot was similar in the way you lost people, and a lot was different. 

At some point during the conversation, Joel reached over the table and took your hands into his. You couldn’t even imagine pulling them away. By the time you caught each other up to speed, the clock above the mess door said it was nearly one in the morning. At this point, it was only you and Joel in the room. It was so strange to you how 20, almost 21 years had passed and it was like you’d talked to him yesterday. You both fell so naturally in line with each other, you had no idea why you were so nervous to begin with. The two of you sat in silence while Joel rubbed circles on the back of your hand with his thumb. You hadn’t felt this kind of comfort in so long, you didn’t want it to end.

Suddenly, the doors burst open to reveal an irritated Ellie and an exasperated Tommy. “Joel, you have all day tomorrow to catch up. You promised me you’d teach me that dumb song on your guitar.” she said, throwing her body down on the chair next to Joel.  

“I’m sorry, we tried everything in our power to keep her entertained. You know how she is about her Joel.” Tommy joked, pushing Ellie’s head forward slightly.

Ellie scoffed, “Yeah, right. This old man? I’m just making sure he makes good of his promise.”  

“You know I always do. But, she’s right. It is gettin' late. I’m sure you gotta be tired.” Joel said, looking over at you. You nodded, finally paying attention to how exhausted your body was.

“Yeah, I am. I’ll give you Joel back, Ellie.” You said smiling to her, “Tommy, you said you got a place I can stay a while?” He nodded, beckoning you with his hand to follow him. You went to follow him but not before Joel grabbed your wrist, stopping you from going any further.

“Promise we’ll talk tomorrow?” His eyes searching yours for something you weren’t sure of.

“’Course. I’m not going anywhere.” Your answer seemed to satisfy him as he gently let go of your wrist and stood. “Alright.”

The next few days flew by. You’d gotten cozy in your tiny home. Which really wasn’t so tiny. Two bedrooms, a working bathroom and kitchen. You could have died there you loved it so much. Tommy had taken you to the pantry to get some essentials stocked up in your house. They gave you a few days to settle in before getting your answer on if you’d be staying long term. Which, of course you were. You saw Joel and Ellie every day. She was always in tow behind him which you thought was the cutest thing ever. She’d been growing on you and you hoped you were growing on her as well. She acted tough at first, almost like she wasn’t interested in getting to know you, which Joel told you she’d come around. You really hoped for that. And you succeeded. 

It seemed like Joel made up any excuse to see you throughout the day. Literally the most mundane things, and there he was. Knocking on that red front door of yours.

“Tommy told me the sink has been leaking. Figured I’d come take a look at it.”

“Actually, the sink has been doing just fine.”

“Oh, well. Maybe I should take a look anyways.”

Or, “I made an extra sandwich. PB&J. Ellie said she didn’t want it. I figured we could have lunch together.”

“Oh, I actually just made some eggs. Also, aren’t you on patrol today?” He pouted, “Oh, yeah. I have a lunch break though. It’s alright if you don’t want it. Jus’ thought I’d ask.”

“... a peanut butter and jelly sandwich sounds pretty good right now.”

And even, “Hey, Maria said they’re playing that one movie you liked at town hall tonight. The one with the green guy and the donkey?”

“Shrek?”

“Uh, yeah. I think so. Want to go watch it me? Or, uh... I mean, Ellie and I?”

“Sure, Joel. I’d love to.”

It was so funny to you. But you loved it. It was so in character for him to beat around the bush or to just make the little excuses to see you or hang out with you without just plain saying “Let’s do something.” You’d come to realize Joel really hadn’t changed much at all in the decades you’d been apart from him. At least, in the ways he’d been showing you. You also realized maybe you hadn’t changed much either over the years. You found yourself falling into ‘normalcy’ easily. You lived for the moments where Ellie would come over and ask you to have dinner with them. Or the little excuses Joel made up to see you. It filled your heart in ways you weren’t even aware of. You were excited to wake up each day, knowing you were with people. Maybe even your people.  

Days turned into weeks and you’d even been assigned work at the preschool during the day. Sometimes you’d take shifts at the mess halls bar, serving drinks to the men and women in the town. You figured it was a good way to make friends. Joel and Ellie always sat at a table near the bar when you'd work with the excuse of keeping you company. Not that you minded, at all.  

One night, a few months after settling in Jackson, you called Ellie over to the bar, “Hey, come here. Wanna teach you something.” Ellie pointed to herself making sure you were talking to her to which you nodded, smiling to her.

“What’s up?” She asked.

“Wanna learn how to make a drink?” You offered. Ellie’s eyes lit up and she agreed eagerly, “Um, yeah, duh! What drink?”

“Well, let’s see what we got. Not much to work with but here,” You said handing her the glass, “Put some ice in it, and fill it up to here with this.”

You handed Ellie the bottle of bourbon on the shelf behind you. She opened the bottle and filled the glass halfway, eyeballing it to exactly where you had pointed. “Hmm, how about we top it off with this?” It was an almost empty bottle of ginger ale. She followed your instructions, filling the glass to the brim. “Okay, now take this spoon, put it at the top of the cup and slam it to the bottom.”  

Ellie looked at you with her eyebrows quirked, “Slam it? But why?”  

You laughed, “Just do it. Trust me.”

Ellie tilted her head, unsure, but did it anyways. She slammed the spoon down, causing the glass to fizz up, nearly spilling over the edge. “Oh shit... Can I drink it now?”  She asked eagerly.  

You laughed again, now tilting your head as you thought a moment, “Well, not too sure about that one, Ellie. Why don’t you go ask your dad?”

Ellie grabbed the glass and carefully walked over to the table Joel was sitting at. You watched from a distance as she asked the older man if she could drink her creation. Joel looked over to you and gave you that look, you mouthed a sorry and stifled a giggle. “Not today, kiddo. Try again when you’re older.”

“Oh, c’mon, Joelllll. I can’t even have a sip?” She whined. It was endearing.

You watched as the two of them went back and forth, arguing over the drink and who was going to drink it. You smiled to yourself. The moment felt so... domestic. You didn’t know what to think of it. But by the way your heartbeat picked up, you figured you might have liked it.

You were cleaning glasses and organizing the liquor when a couple of men sat at the bar, and removed the hats off their heads. “Back from a late patrol, boys?” You asked, placing cups in front of them and pouring some whiskey into it.

“Yes, ma’am. Not much out there when it’s ‘bout 10 degrees and snowing.” One of them said. He was a regular. Here at the bar every Thursday and Friday. Maybe Sunday’s. You’d picked up from his friend that his name was Luke. He was younger. Probably about 25, maybe 26. His friend, who you learned was named James was a bit older. Mid-thirties, married, had two kids. They were both nice, however, James was a flirt despite being wed. Luke tried but he was pretty inexperienced. Both alright looking though, the younger being taller and thin, blond hair and blue eyes. The older one was shorter in stature, bit thicker, with darker hair and green eyes. If you were honest, you weren’t the biggest fan of James, but a you remained cordial.

“It is a chilly one out there,” James began, “Luke needs someone to keep him warm at night. You’re single, aren’t ya, ___?” He said, smiling. His grin somehow gave you bad vibes, but you smiled back nonetheless.  

“I am. But I'm not looking right now. Sorry, Luke. I’m old enough to be your mom!” You laughed, finishing up wiping a couple of glasses and setting them in a tray under the bar. “Barely! Maybe if you were a teen mom or something.” He retorted. You just smiled and went about your business.  

A little while later after a few more people came and drank, it was almost time to call it a night. You peaked behind the people finishing up their drinks and sure enough, Joel was still there, with a book, listening to the random music that played on the stereo. You bit your lip, hiding the smile that adorned it. He was always there.

“All I’m saying is that, if I weren’t married, I’d be all up on that! Luke, c’mon she’s a single cougar. Get your head in the game.” You overheard James's whispering to the younger man next to him. James sighed, “I don’t know, James. She’s been seen with that Miller guy. Not Tommy but the other one. He’s scary. Heard he’s killed a bunch’a guys.”  

“Oh, come on. He’s not that bad. Just an old dude. Plus look at her. She’s fucking worth it, man. The ass she has on her? God, and those tits.” James continued.

You mentally scoffed. You figured he was a slime ball but this was just flat out gross. Thank God the mess hall was closing soon because you were about ready to give the man a piece of your mind. Suddenly, James said something, attempting to get your attention but you pretended not to hear.

“Helloooo! I said can Luke get another drink here?” He repeated himself.

“Oh, sorry. I’ll pour you one more but we gotta close up soon.” You replied, filling Luke’s glass once more.

“Jesus, Luke. You see that? Dumb and hot. I bet you could convince her to get in bed with you.” This was your last straw. You get they’d been drinking but they clearly lacked common sense. You turned to the sleazy drunk, ready to tear him a new one but it turned out you didn’t need to. You stood there; arms crossed waiting for whatever was going to happen next.

“What’sa matter, baby? Suddenly want a piece of what Jamesy-boy has to offer? Got enough to go around!” Your eyes rolled as he tried again, digging himself a further hole.

“Don’t think she likes what you’re offering her, Jamesy-boy.” Joel said behind him, placing both of his hands on either of James shoulders. Luke’s eyes widened at what was happening, or at least about to. He had some decency to know what James was saying was wrong, but he lacked the balls to say something about it.

“Wha-What... How would you know what she likes and doesn’t? How dare you come up and put your hands on m-” James bit his tongue when he turned around to see a seething Joel behind him.  

“Wanna repeat what you were about to say?” Joel asked, leaning down into the man's face. James shook his head quickly, struggling to move from his seat as he was so frightened.

“If I see or hear you talking to her again, hell, even lookin’ at her, I’ll mess you up so bad, your wife won’t even want what ‘Jamesy-boy' has to offer. Y’hear me?” Your eyes widened at Joel’s threats and you couldn’t help but like what he was saying. His words turned in your stomach as you felt the heat build there and further down. Only God knew what that said about you.

James nodded, trying to slip past Joel. Luke got up as well, ready to follow his friend out. “I didn’t hear you say it. Out loud, now.”  

“I-I won’t talk or look at her again. S-Sorry about that.” He stuttered.

“Good. Don’t apologize to me though.” Joel said, signaling over to you.  

“I’m sorry, ___. It-It won’t happen again.” You nodded, acknowledging him, waving him away.

The two of them scurried away like the rats they were. Good riddance. You looked at Joel who was now sitting at the bar. “Jesus, Joel...”

He scoffed, “What? Was that not okay? He was harrassin-”

“I think you’ve gotten softer in your old age.” You chimed in. Joel stared at you, confused as to what the hell you were talking about.

“Excuse me?” He asked. “I told him I’d beat him so bad he’d be disfigured and that was soft?”

You laughed, finishing up the last of the cleaning before close. “Yeah. The old Joel I knew would deck a guy for saying something to me.”

Joel sat there a moment as he recalled the night at the bar where he broke a man's jaw for calling you a slut. He smiled lightly, “That’s right. You’re right... maybe I have gotten soft.”

Your eyes rolled as you grabbed your winter jacket and throwing it on, “Come on, softie. Walk me home.”

Joel obliged, getting up from his seat and following you out of the mess hall. The two of you walked into the frigid air, almost instantly shivering from the lack of warmth the place provided you. The sun had set a long time ago, leaving the milky blue hues of the night appear next to the luminescence of the moon. It was a sight. You stared up at the floating rock in the sky, entranced by its beauty. If everything in this world has changed, the moon stayed the same. You were a big fan. You were so engrossed in the way the moonlight shined; you had no clue someone was doing the same but to you. Joel walked with you, paying no mind to the road ahead of him. His eyes were on your frame, on the swell of your breasts, on your lips. He noted how your irises twinkled as you peered up to sky. It caused a lump to form in his throat, his heart rate picking up as he tried to swallow it down.

“Hey, Joel?” You asked suddenly, his gaze quickly leaving you as you looked to him.

“Yeah? What’s up?” He replied, clearing his throat.

“Back there… in the mess. I could have handled that myself.”

Joel was taken aback for a moment before chuckling softly, “Oh, darlin’ I know. He should have been more scared of what you were gonna do to him instead of me.”

You laughed back, nudging Joel on the shoulder with your own, “I mean it! I would have tore him apart had you not been there.”

Joel smiled, “I know, I know. Maybe I just wanted some points in my favor with you. Make me look cooler, maybe make you like me more.” He continued.

You looked at him with a confused face, “Like you more? Joel, I’m not sure if that’s even possible. I think I like you too much.” Your nerves started getting the better of you as you realized what you’d just said. Joel’s eyes widened but only for a second. He started slowing his steps down as he turned to you, “Like me too much, huh?”

“Just forget I said it.” You piped in quickly, trying to back track.

“Don’t think I can do that, darlin’.” Joel said, stopping you from going any further. He wrapped his calloused hand around your wrist, lightly pulling you to him. Your eyes softened as you looked up to the man, your cheeks reddening under the yellow-toned streetlight the two of you stood under. You wanted to look away. You didn’t want Joel to see the way he so easily made you blush. “Stop hiding from me. You look so pretty, tonight. You always do.” Joel placed his free hand under your jaw, leading your eyes to meet his.  

“Why can’t you forget I said anything?” You hushed, entranced in the way he was looking at you. Like you were the most precious thing in the world. He just laughed, bringing his hand from your wrist to the other side of your face. “Don’t want to. Think I might like you too much, too.”

You smiled, heart racing, stomach flipping; everything. You brought your hands up to Joel’s jacket, running over the wrinkles until you hit his neck and kept them there. Snowflakes began to litter from the sky and danced around the two of you, melting as soon as they hit your bodies. “Well, Joel Miller. If you like me so much, why don’t you kiss me?”

“Can I?” he asked softly, nudging his nose with yours as he closed the space between you. All you could do was nod as your words failed. That’s all he needed before his lips were on yours. His soft lips met yours, only a little chapped. You moved with him as he kissed you, one of his hands wrapping around the back of your neck while the other fell to the nape of your spine. Your own hands wrapping around his neck and lacing through the bottom of his hair. You both stood there for what felt like forever, just enjoying the embrace. At one point Joel nipped the bottom of your lip, asking for an entrance. Your tongues moved and intertwined with each other as Joel deepened it even more. You didn’t want to break away as you were quite literally seeing stars and hearing fireworks but Joel stepped away first. “We-We need to stop, baby girl.” He said breathlessly.

“Why? I want to kiss you more.” You insisted, moving your head to kiss him again.

Joel grinned, pecking you again lightly once, twice, maybe a third time. “Trust me. I need to kiss you more. But not here.” You agreed with him as you pulled him further down the street. It was a straight shot to your house when suddenly Joel stopped again.

“What’s wrong?” You asked.

He hesitated, his face etched in concern. “You’re not gonna regret taking me home with you, are you?”  

Your eyebrows pulled together as you looked at him like he’d said something ridiculous, because it was. “Joel, do you think I’d regret it?”

He hesitated, unsure of himself, “Don’t know... ‘S why I’m asking you. Don’t want you mixed up with the ‘crazy old guy’.”

You paused a moment, almost laughing at how silly it was. You walked right back up to Joel, placing both of your hands on his cheeks a pulled him into you, kissing him once again. It was full of intensity. You wanted to show Joel just how badly you wanted him, crazy or not. Hell, you were old too. Joel fell naturally into it, wrapping his arms around your body. He chased your lips like he was addicted. It sent you soaring. After a moment, you pulled away, “Come on. Take me to bed.”  

Joel placed his forehead against yours, holding you to his body. You could hear the heavy, desperate breaths coming from him like he was wagering with himself. Joel cupped your face once again, his lips ghosting over yours before whispering, “Let’s go.”

The trip to your bedroom was hazy. You were so out of your mind with want for this man you were shaking. As soon as you both entered your room and the door was shut, Joel was at you. He shed you of the thick winter jacket you had on and the fleece sweater under that. You did the same to him, pushing off his coat and flannel in one go. Your lips met fiercely, your hands running up his chest to his neck, pulling him closer. You wanted to be engulfed in him in every way. It scared you a bit at how much you wanted him in this moment, how much you needed him. You shivered at the lack of clothing as Joel pulled your jeans down, leaving you in your bra and underwear. He stepped away but only for a moment as he discarded his shirt and worked on his pants. His eyes ever left your body. His breath grew heavy again, watching the way his chest puffed up and down. You could see the strain of his length, begging to be released as he stepped out of his own pants and returned to your body.  

Joel kissed from your clavicle to your neck, biting and sucking as he saw fit. You moaned as you wrapped your arms around him, scratching his back lightly. He grunted, shuddering from the pain as it turned into pleasure. Joel grinded against you, his erection poking your belly. Your hand flew down to it, rubbing him through the fabric of his boxers. He sighed, kissing up your jaw to your mouth as he fucked into your hand. “f-fuck, baby girl. You’re drivin’ me insane.” He stuttered, his hands at your panties as he slid them down. He left them just below your ass, gripping your cheeks and kneading them in his large hands. You moaned again, your own hand slipping into his underwear as you continued your ministries. His cock was already slick with precum. God, he was so needy for you. Never in his life had he had a desire this intense. Both your bodies felt like fire as your fingertips danced over the expanse of each other’s skin.  

You were just as desperate. You could feel the wetness drip from your folds on to where your underwear sat, your swollen bud just aching to be played with. It’s like Joel could sense that, as one of his hands left your ass and dipped inside of you. He circled your clit slowly at first which you could have cried at. You needed more. You bucked your hips into his hand and he got the hint, picking up his speed. You both stood there at the side of your bed, getting each other off. Both moaning into each other’s mouth, licking up his jaw as he did to yours.

“Baby, need to be inside of you. F-fuck, I’m goin’ crazy.” He breathed; his breath muted as he spoke against your lips. You were already so close from Joel working so hard on your clit, but you knew coming around his cock would be way more gratifying. You nodded, separating yourself from him as you shucked your bra off and climbed on to your mattress, minding the way you wiggled your behind ever-so-slightly to which Joel moaned out loud at. Joel rid himself from his boxers and climbed over to you, hovering over your body as he pecked hot, open-mouthed kisses up your body.

“You’re so f-fucking beautiful.” He spoke, eyes on you. Your own eyes rolled as you wrapped your hands around his neck pulling him in for another kiss.

“Quit buttering me up, Miller.” You sighed, licking a strip up his tongue. Joel’s grip on your waist tightened. He was so hard it was beginning to hurt. “Not doing no such thing, darlin’. You’re so fuckin’ pretty. Look at how hard you get me. Been doing this to me a while now. Just lookin’ at you, I could cum.” His words went straight into your heat as you clenched around nothing. You needed him in you or you’d quite literally die.  

“Oh yeah? How long you been touching yourself to me?” You asked, your hand returning to his cock as you lined him up at your entrance. Joel slid his leaking tip in between your folds, running it up to your clit, rubbing there for a moment.  

He laughed softly, “Long time, baby girl. Here and there before. But now that you’re here with me again; it’s almost every night.” Your back arched at his confession. There’d been many nights you’d lay awake since you moved to Jackson. Your mind thinking of the events of the day, but they’d always end up on Joel. They way he’d sip from his glass of whiskey, or bourbon. The way he’d come into the mess hall after a patrol, always a little disheveled and sweaty. Or the way he was always so intense with you, never looking away when you spoke, when you laughed. How he’d always find a way to have a hand on you, just to be as close as possible.  

“Joel, put it in, fuck- all the way. Please fuck me.” You begged, your legs wrapping around his waist.

“You ready for me, sweetheart?” He asked, teasing your needy hole with his tip, pushing it in slowly. You nodded, lips back on his. Joel pushed himself in easily. You were beyond ready for him. He gasped at the sensation. He loved the feeling of his cock being swallowed up by you. He looked down at your cunt as he bottomed out, moaning at the sight.  

“Jesus... you take me so well. Y’always have. Like you were made for me.”  

His words sent you spiraling, your eyes rolling back as you felt his fat cock fill you up. He started at a slower pace that was still intense. His lips on yours as he kissed into your open mouth. You couldn’t help the moans and sighs that escaped your reddened, plump lips, abused from Joel’s own. Joel pumped into you, your slick mixing with his as you both created a symphony of wispy moans and slaps against each other’s skin. It was fucking beautiful. His hand pushed the stray hairs away from your face as he picked up speed, thrusting into you as the claps became louder. “Yes-s, take it. Let me see that pretty face of yours. So fucked out ‘cause of me.”

You loved how vocal he was. It was a driving force as he slammed into you, on the edge of his high. You were right behind him, the coil in the pit of your stomach on the verge of snapping. Joel’s thumb worked on your swollen bud again, circling quickly as he wanted you to come with him.  

“Joel I-I'm so close, fuck!” You cried out, your arm thrown over your eyes as he rutted into you.

“Move that arm of yours, wanna see you when you come for me.” You obeyed, your arms wrapping back around his neck pulling him down to you. Joel kept his pace steady, and with a few more flicks of his thumb, you were unraveling. Your hand flew to his hair, gripping it as you moaned, calling out his name. Joel felt your cunt tighten around him, gripping him to you. “Yes, fuck, take it! ’s all yours, baby. Always yours.” His pace slowed; you felt the hot ropes of cum filling any leftover space inside you, coating you. Tears pricked your eyes as he continued the remainder of his thrusting, everything becoming too much.  

Joel’s softened dick slid out of you and was replaced by two of his long fingers, “Don’t want you to waste a drop. Keep it all in, baby doll.”  

Your eyes closed; body enamored with pleasure as your legs shook from the af effects of your orgasm. Joel collapsed on to you, pecking your chest and neck with more kisses and love bites. His hands found their way up to your hair and weaved into it. He wanted you close, but you weren’t going anywhere.

The room was quiet besides the sounds of both yours and Joel’s labored breaths. You could hear your heartbeat in your ears as you basked in the comfortable silence. It was a while before either of you spoke. You actually thought Joel had fallen asleep which sucked, cause while you loved him being on top of you, he was getting heavy.

“Do you regret it?”  He spoke suddenly.

You pushed yourself up onto your elbows as you peered down to the older man on you. You looked at him incredulously, like you’d been shocked. “Regret what we just did?” He nodded slowly, eyes on yours.

“Joel,” You began, fully sitting up as you pulled him with you, “Why would you even ask that?”

“I just... Dunno. Just feel like you could do better than an old, crazy guy. Lots of guys ‘round here dying to have you even look at ‘em.”

You sighed, your shoulders slumping. Your hand reached out to Joel’s face, petting the grayed scruff on his jaw. You took some time to figure out how to say exactly what you were feeling, even then it was hard to explain. “If you think that, genuinely; You really must be an old, crazy man.” You laughed, trying to lighten the mood.

“I don’t think you realize that I am absolutely in love with you, Joel Miller.” Joel’s breath hitched as his eyes widened slightly. His heartrate picked back up. He really wasn’t expecting to hear that.  

“Not Luke. Not James. No one else. Ever. I get that might be a lot to place on you so sudd-”

Before you could even end your sentence, Joel’s lips were on yours again. He kissed you so deeply, so passionately, that you could have exploded. Your body was so warm even with the bite of the negative temperatures outside. He pulled you on to his lap and just... held you. He held you so delicately, like you’d break with any amount of pressure. After a moment, he broke away and maybe you were just seeing things, but you could have sworn you saw a little tear drop, threatening to fall. Your eyes glazed over, tears of your own beckoning an appearance. You truly were just so in love with him, it was crazy. You’d only been reunited a few months back but, it was as if you’d spent the last 21 years with him. It felt as though no time was spent apart at all. Things between you just worked so naturally and flowed so well. Like you were made for him, just as he said. And as though he were made for you.

Another comfortable silence lingered in the air. You both just genuinely enjoyed the presence of one another. Joels hands rested at your waist, one them made its way to your back, rubbing small circles on to your skin. His head fell into you, resting just above your breast as he breathed you in. Your own hand had moved to his hair, scratching his head lightly.

Joel sucked in a big breath of air before speaking, “Don’t think I’ve heard those words in a couple’a decades.” You nodded along with him. It’d been a long time for you too. Joel looked up to you, too comfortable to move any further. His eyes glimmered as he looked into yours. It was as if you held the universe within those orbs of yours. He couldn’t look away.

“I am absolutely in love with you too, my sweet girl.” Now it was your turn to be surprised even if you weren’t really. Not like you’d been expecting him to say it, but it was still something. You couldn’t help but smile as a tear fell. You didn’t want to cry, not at all. But you couldn’t help it. Your body swelled with emotion as every cavity of you filled with love and admiration for this worn-down man in front of you. Both of you changed in so many ways, some for the better, maybe some for worse. But when you really looked at it, not so much was different. He was still Joel Miller, and he was yours.  

“Good.” Was all you could say as more tears threatened to fall.

Joel smiled, a small laugh escaping his lips. “Good.”

taglist: @paleidiot, @aestheticangel612​

i hope u all like this part! soft joel is my absolute weakness and i love writing him. i think i might take some requests so if anyone has any ideas for Joel Miller or even Din Djarin :o i’d be glad to see them! also lemme know if anyone else would like to be added to a taglist <3

likes and reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed <3

[old-29]

Finally

By; .O.L.D.

CONRAD x READER

It had been a tough summer for us Conklins. My sister, Belly, called Jeremiah which is how we learned that Conrad went missing. As much to my sister’s dismay, I tagged along with her and Jeremiah when they decided to go search for him.

The thing is, I’ve been in love with Conrad since I was kid. I liked him before Belly did. I had told her one night that I liked Connie which was mistake on my part because she started to notice him more. Noticing him more led her to becoming in love with him.

Conrad and I were always so close, he made me feel so included as I tended to be left out of most activities that Jere, Steven and Belly were apart of. I also had a lot of differences compared to them which is why they never included me in anything. For example, they thought it was weird when I decided to read instead of going to the beach . So, with certain choices like that, they never really invited me to tag along. However, Conrad was always there for me and he taught me how to tie knots, he’d read with me, he let me talk to him about things that made me happy, he would watch movies with me, he even won me this cute elephant stuffy, that I named Einstein, at the boardwalk when I was sick and couldn’t go. He was just always there for me. He was my favourite person. Therefore, when I found out that he went missing, it was my turn to be there for him. However, with everything that happened this year, I was nervous to see him.

When Conrad and my sister started dating, I strayed away from Conrad. I avoided his calls, I never answered his messages and when he tried to start conversations with me in person, I was very dry. So, we ended up loosing touch. I was hurt, even though he didn’t know why. It just hurt seeing him and my sister so happy. That’s why I thought it was so out of the blue when Conrad broke up with Belly at prom. I had such a crappy night that day. I had to watch the love of my life take my sister to prom and then I had to listen to my sister cry about how the love of my life broke her heart. The thing was, Conrad was off all night and I had to keep reminding my sister that his mom was dying and to give him a bit of a break. I couldn’t imagine how it would feel if our mom was dying. However, I wasn’t expecting him to break up with my sister.

As much as my sister wanted me to stay home and so did my anxiety tey, I couldn’t get over the fact that Conrad was missing. I promised Susannah that I would look after him when she passed away and I will always keep that promise. It was a very awkward drive up there and I felt like I was just used by Jeremiah to make the situation less awkward. He kept asking me questions that he had no interest in asking me in all the years I have known him. Eventually I just put my headphones in and left them alone with their problems. The interactions between Belly and Jeremiah were super awkward to be around.

After last summer, I’ve had a lot of resentment towards my sister. I was super happy when I originally found out that she was with Jeremiah. They seemed like they would make a very good couple but at the end of summer I found out she kissed Conrad. I don’t just hold the resentment towards her kissing Conrad but also because I feel like it was a shitty thing to do if she was with Jere. She was making things messy, like Steven said. Her choices and behaviour made me angry and I couldn’t even hold a conversation with her without being mad. So overall, the tension on the drive up to Cousins was horrible.

However, even though this summer was super stressful, it was also super rehabilitating. Conrad and I became close again, Jeremiah, Belly and Conrad worked things out, Steven and Taylor got together and we even became close with Jere and Con’s cousin, Skye. Belly and I even smoothed things over with our relationship. Although, my relationship between Conrad felt different in a really amazing way. Our stares would linger far more than they should, he was more touchy with me and I swore at the party, before Milo and Stevens fight, we almost kissed. I thought this summer brought us closer together. Which brings us to today.

Yesterday we found out that Conrad got into Stanford but because he missed a week before his final, he didn’t think he’d be able to pass which meant no Stanford. Thus, we pulled a famous all nighter. I was so proud of Conrad, so proud, and I reminded him every five seconds. We even had a group dance party in the kitchen. It was a nice night.

Now we are on the way to Brown in support of Conrad. I want to make sure that his Stanford dream comes true. A studying Conrad and I are in the backseat while Belly and Jere are in the front.

“She’s a good girl, loves her mama!” Belly, Jere and I sang loudly.

“I’m trying to study!” Conrad exclaimed.

“She’s a good girl, crazy about Elvis.” Belly sang while looking at Conrad.

“Loves horses and her boyfriend too.” I sang while I tapped Conrad’s nose.

He gave me one of his luxurious smiles which just melted my heart. I would do anything for this boy, he made me so happy.

As we pulled into Brown, my nervousness got worse. I was nervous for Conrad. This week must have been a lot of pressure. Dealing with the house being up for sale and dealing with the thought of school. I could just feel the weight on this boy’s shoulders. It must have been the same for Conrad because he grabbed my hand and squeezed it.

“Hey”, I began to whisper, “you are going to do great! I’ll walk you to the door ok?”

“Ok. Thank you guys, I really appreciate it.”

“Of course man, go kill it.” Jeremiah said.

“You’ll do great Con!”

Whenever my sister talked to Conrad, I got rushes of jealousy. Sometimes I wonder if there is still something there between the two.

“Alright guys, I’ll be back eventually.” I said as I got out of the car.

Conrad walked over to me and held my hand.

“You should tour around Brown. You’d love it here, y/n/n! They have a huge library that you’d spend a lot of time in.”

“I was actually going to apply here, but you’re going to Stanford so maybe I’ll apply there!”

He chuckled.

“I just wanted to apply where you go so that if I get in, I’ll know that I’ll always have you. You’re my favourite person, Con.”

“You’ll always have me. I’m always a phone call away. You’re my favourite person too so I don’t want you to worry about loosing me.”

He turned to look at me and didn’t say anything, instead he hugged me

“I’ll be right here when you walk out, ok? I promise.”

“Yes ma’am! Also, thank you. It really means a lot that you stuck around. ”

I held out to that promise. I toured Brown a little bit. It was super pretty, he was right, I would love it here. It felt like a Gilmore Girls moment at Yale. I even got to check out the library and it was so cozy. I decided to spend the rest of the time reading under a tree. I could really picture myself here. I must of zoned out because the next thing I know I’m being called by Conrad.

“Earth to y/n!”

“Con, sorry, how’d it go!?”

“Are you ready to visit me in California!?”

“Conrad!!! I’m so proud of you. I knew you could do it.”

We hugged for what felt like a very long time which I didn’t mind. I was so proud of him. He was off to great places this boy.

“Let’s go tell Jeremiah and Belly! They’ll be so proud of you!!”

I wasn’t even paying attention to where I was going because I was too busy paying attention to Conrad’s smile. He looked so proud of himself! All of a sudden, his smile faded and when I looked at where he was staring, my mouth dropped open. My sister and his brother were making out. My heart dropped for two reasons. One, this must hurt Conrad judging by his facial expression and two, if he is hurt by this, he still must love Belly.

Conrad cleared his throat. Jeremiah and Belly looked like they saw a ghost.

“Y/n, could you give us all a minute?”

“Y-yeah.”

I walked back to the courtyard. I was curious on why Conrad didn’t want me around for what he wanted to say.

Conrads POV:

“Conrad…”

“You told me no, Belly.” I said.

“What?” Belly looked very confused.

“At the party, when I asked if I could tell y/n how I’ve been feeling. You told me no.”

“Yeah I did but-“

“Out of respect I didn’t and my chest physically hurts to not be able to say how I feel. How I’ve felt for a very long time. I just don’t get how I can’t tell y/n how I feel but you can make out with my brother!? Screw this.”

I was so mad. I’ve been in love with y/n forever but I only dated Belly because I thought I had no chance. I know that sounds terrible but I thought that if I could move on and be happy, it wouldn’t matter. However, a week before prom y/n called Belly and because Belly was in the shower, I picked up the phone and it was a conversation that made me realize that I couldn’t keep pretending. So I let Belly go. I know I should have told her before prom but I couldn’t find a way to say “hey, I’ve been in love with your sister since forever and now I have a chance so I have to break up with you” and on top of everything, my mom was really sick. It was a tough situation and I had a lot in my mind which altered my mood at prom. For the longest time I was crushed by the fact that I wasted an opportunity with y/n. However, I eventually found a way to tell Belly about my feelings for y/n this week and when I asked for her blessing, she said no. Now she’s making out with my brother.

“Con, you can have her. I only said what I said because I was extremely drunk and wasn’t really thinking straight. It was a rough night at the party, everything was getting destroyed at the house. Me saying no to you about y/n was a mistake because I don’t mean it, I know you’ve been in love with her for a long time. Dating you was holding you back from what you truly wanted. I should’ve let you go sooner and I’m sorry for that. Now go to her!”

So I did.

Y/n’s POV:

I was standing there in the courtyard for what felt like hours. All the resentment I had for Belly came back and I was hurt all over again. This situation made me realize that no matter what, I wouldn’t have a chance with Conrad. I was about to make my way back to the car when I noticed Conrad approaching me angrily.

“Conrad, are you ok?”

“I broke up with Belly because of you.”

“Oh.” My face dropped, I didn’t want to be the reason for his unhappiness.

“No! No, no, that came out wrong. What I meant was, when you called Belly, but I picked up and you told me you liked me, I couldn’t- wait, you don’t remember?”

“No I don’t, I-“

And it all came flooding back to me.

“That was you on the phone!?”

It was a party that I didn’t want to go to. Taylor asked me to go to a party but I also just found out that Belly was bringing Conrad to the prom and I was super bummed and didn’t want to go. Taylor knew that I’ve had a thing for Conrad and she promised to never tell Belly.

“You can’t just sit in your room, crying while you watch ‘My Girl’, it’s not good for you. So, get ready and I’ll be there in 20 minutes.”

So I got ready and let’s just say I got extremely drunk. I normally never drink so all the alcohol I consumed hit hard.

“That’s it, I’m calling B-belly and telling her how she i-is annoying.”

“Y/n, don’t-“

“Dialled. Go back to Milo.”

“Hey, y/n/n.” the other side of the phone said

“Listen Belly, you win ok!?”

“No, y/n, it’s Con-“

“You can have anything you want! Anything. I just want Conrad.”

I was sobbing at this point.

“I miss him. I know you are with him but I love him so much Bells. I wish that he chose me over you. I-I know that’s a shitty thing to say but I’ve wanted him my whole life. I just want Conrad,Belly, please. I’m begging you.”

With that I hung up the phone. What I didn’t register was that it was Conrad. I thought it was Belly. We never talked about the incident after and I thought it was just because she didn’t care what I wanted which made me resent her more.

“I broke up with her because of wanting you and this summer when I asked-“

“You want me?”

I was on the verge of crying. I’ve been looking forward to this moment for years and I never thought I had a chance.

“O-of course I do, y/n. I have for years but I always thought that you never wanted me. I’ve been in love with you forever.”

“You don’t love Belly anymore?”

“If I loved her, I’d still be with her. Y/n, you’re the only one I’ve ever wanted.”

He walked towards me and gave me the most passionate kiss ever. It held so much emotion. His hands cupped my face while mine grasped his shoulders. Our lips were in sync. Everything was perfect. It was better than I expected what a first kiss would be.

“I love you, Con.”

“I love you too, y/n, now let’s get you home.”

[all-the-things-2020]

Late Night Talking - Chapter Nineteen

Summary: Emily moves in, Dieter gets the flu … and Valentine’s Day Dieter Bravo style.

Rating: PG-13

Word count: 5600+

Tag list: @rhoorl @avastrasposts @readingiskeepingmegoing @runningmom94 @gwendibleywrites @weho2kcmo

Things moved quickly once we got back to California. With the help of a moving company (and Oladele) I was soon out of my condo and living in Dieter’s house. I also bought a new car. Dieter had insisted I “just look” at the Audis and I fell in love with a little blue sedan. It was at the lower end of the range, but still expensive to me. Writing out a check for roughly $40,000 was a surreal experience. 

Dieter insisted the car needed a name and that it was a boy. “Auden? Austin? Augustus?,” he suggested.

”Augustus? What kind of name is that for a car?”

”Well, there aren’t that many names that start with A-U,” he said, furrowing his brow. He pulled out his phone. “Auggie? 

”That’s just short for Augustus,” I pointed out. “And we can’t call an Audi Austin because that’s another make of car.”

”Then it has to be Auden,” Dieter said. “He was a poet, wasn’t he? That’s good for a bookish person, right?”

And so Auden it was. 

**********************************************

Soon it was February and Sam’s birthday was coming up. We always called each other on our birthdays, setting aside an hour just for us. One year she’d even walked away from her own birthday party to sit outside on her porch in the cold so we could have our birthday chat.

”Why don’t you fly back there and surprise her?” Dieter suggested. “Call her from the sidewalk and when she answers, tell her to come outside.”

”I can’t just fly to Maryland on a whim,” I said. Dieter raised an eyebrow and I realized that I could do that. I could go online and book a flight and hotel and not have to worry about where the money was coming from. It felt decadent. It felt wrong. It felt amazing.

”Do it,” he urged. “Let me be the one sitting home alone for once.”

I flew to Maryland and did just what Dieter suggested: I stood outside of Sam’s house and called her. When she opened the front door and saw me, we both burst into tears. It had been years since we’d seen each other in person.

”Oh, my God, chickie!,” she sobbed. “This is the best birthday present ever!”

We spend the weekend on her couch, eating chips and ice cream, watching old movies and basically just being teenage girls; all the stuff we missed out on doing together when she’d moved away.

”So you’re getting married,” Sam said at one point. She took my hand and made a show of studying my ring from several angles. 

“It still doesn’t quite seem real,” I admitted. “I’ve barely moved in and honestly I still feel like I’m just on a break and I’ll have to go home and back to work.”

”Any wedding plans yet?” There was a glint in her eye that made me feel excited.

”Nothing firm. Why, do you have an idea?”

”Remember when we were little and we did that whole soap opera with our Barbies and Kens and my brother’s G.I. Joes? And your Barbie got married at the beach and then her husband got eaten by sharks?”

I hadn’t thought about that summer in years. We’d played out so many silly plot lines with our dolls and action figures. Every day we created a new episode. Of course, our soap opera leaned more heavily on car chases and jumping off cliffs and fighting wild tigers than romance, but we were only about eight years old at the time. 

“I’m not feeding Dieter to a shark,” I said.

Sam rolled her eyes. “Duh! I meant, how about a beach wedding? You live in L.A., you said you want a summer wedding so Dieter’s brother and his kids can come out … my kids will be off for the summer.”

”You’re just fishing for an invitation,” I teased. 

“Oh, I’m going to be there,” Sam said firmly. “I’m going to be your maid of honor.”

I felt tears welling in my eyes. I couldn’t afford to fly back east for Sam’s wedding, but she’d still asked me to be her maid of honor, only giving the job to one of her cousins after I’d had to decline. 

“I’d love to have you at the wedding,” I said. “It won’t be big or fancy. Dieter and I haven’t talked details yet but we both want something small and informal.”

”Which is perfect for a beach wedding,” Sam said. “I can totally see Dieter in a white suit, barefoot, open neck shirt, and you in a white sundress, the ocean breeze playing with your hair.”

“Or maybe Deet in board shorts and a PacSun t shirt.”

”You could wear a bikini and freak out your Aunt Helen!”

”Speedos!”

We collapsed into giggles. “I’ve missed you, chickie,” I said.

”I’ve missed you, too,” Sam said. “But just think, now you’ll be able to come visit whenever you want. And I’ll have a place to stay in California.” She winked.

**************************************************

That winter, I’d managed to avoid catching the flu, which was an occupational hazard of working in a public school. Dieter, unfortunately, was not as lucky, as I found when I called him from the airport when I landed.

“I’b fide,” he said over FaceTime, before turning away to blow his nose loudly.  He’d clearly been doing that a lot, because his nose was red and tender looking. 

“You are not fine,” I retorted. “I shouldn’t have gone.”

”I didin stard feeling sick undil after you lefd. Bud id’s nod dad bad.” He immediately sneezed and coughed at the same time.

”Go to bed,” I said. “I’ll be home as soon as I can.”

On the way home from LAX, I stopped at a Walgreens and stocked up on everything I thought Dieter might possibly need. When I finally got home. I let myself in and dropped my bags on the kitchen island. “Hey, sweetie, are you awake?” I called out.

I turned around when I heard a noise coming from the hallway. Dieter shuffled into the dining room, his ratty green bathrobe wrapped around a dirty t-shirt and pajama pants, with an assortment of used tissues falling out of the pockets. His hair was even more wild than usual, and looked greasy. His nose was red and raw, he clearly hadn’t shaved since I’d left home and his eyes were glassy.

“Hey,” he croaked, leaning against the wall.

“You look horrible,” I said.

“Thangs,” he grumped. “I feel lige shid.”

I walked over to him and laid my hand on his forehead. He felt hot and smelled gross. “Ugh, when was the last time you showered?” I asked. “Or changed your clothes.”

He shrugged. “Coupla days ago,” he mumbled.

I shook my head. “Disgusting.” I turned him around and pushed him back toward the bedroom. The bed looked as bad as he did. The covers were all shoved into a tangled pile in the center of the bed and there was an overflowing trash can surrounded by a scattered ring of tissues.

“Okay, we’re getting you and this room cleaned up,” I said. I plopped him down on the bed and opened the dresser to pull out a clean t-shirt and pair of pajama pants. I popped into the hall to grab some towels and a washcloth from the linen closet and then came back to find Dieter on his side, groaning into the pillow.

“Get up, babe,” I told him. “You need a shower.”

“Don’d wan’ a shower,” he grumbled. 

“Tough,” I said. “You stink. Come on, I’ll help you.”

I pulled him up and led him to the bathroom, where I turned on the water to warm up. I knew he really did feel horrible, because as I stripped off his clothes, he didn’t make any jokes or try anything cute. He seemed a bit wobbly, so I got undressed as well and we stepped into the shower together. 

“Lean against the wall if you feel dizzy or weak,” I told him. I adjusted the shower head so the water wasn’t hitting him in the face, and helped him step under the spray.

“Cold,” he complained. 

“It’ll warm up in a minute,” I said. “Come on, let’s get you clean.” I worked quickly, soaping up the washcloth and scrubbing his body thoroughly. “Bend down,” I told him when I was done, and I shampooed and rinsed his hair.

I helped him get out and wrapped him in towels. “Dry off and we’ll get you in clean jammies,” I said. He rolled his eyes at the word “jammies” but he did as he was told. I helped him into the clean shirt and flannel pants, put my clothes back on, and then led him out to the living room.

“I’m going to park you on the couch while I change the bed, okay?” I tucked some throw pillows behind his back and spread one of the throws that lived on the back of the couch over his lap. I put the remote in his hand and smoothed his wet hair back off his forehead so I could give him a kiss.

I stripped the bed and carried the dirty linens to the laundry room, then went back and remade the bed with clean sheets, blankets, pillowcases and the summer duvet that was tucked in the very back of the linen closet. When I was done, I threw the winter comforter into the washer and went back to check on Dieter.

He was staring dully at the TV, which was tuned to a cooking program, something he normally didn’t watch. “You want to stay out here, or go back to bed?” I asked. He turned slowly to me and blinked twice.

“Bed,” he said after a moment.

I walked him back to the bedroom, tucked him in, piled pillows behind him so he was partially propped up and then went to fetch my supplies from Walgreens. I couldn’t remember what we had in the medicine chest so I had bought everything: a thermometer, assorted medications, tissues, cough drops … even a couple of cans of chicken soup and a box of saltine crackers.

First, I took his temperature. “One hundred point two,” I said. “Not too bad.” I dropped the Tylenol back into the bag. We wouldn’t be needing that unless his fever spiked higher. Then I asked him about his symptoms.

“Congestion … definitely,” I said. “Is your throat sore?”

“Kind of scratchy,” he admitted. 

“But not sore sore?”

“No.”

“How about coughing?”

We ran through every symptom I could think of and I lined up the medications and other supplies I’d need on the nightstand on his side of the bed. 

“Okay,” I said when I was done. “Did you eat dinner yet?”

He shook his head. “Not hungry.”

“You need to eat,” I said firmly. “I’m going to make you some soup.”

“I’m not hungry,” he whined.

“Tough,” I replied. “You’re going to eat.”

I heated up a can of chicken noodle soup and boiled some water for tea. By the time I brought it into the bedroom, Dieter was half asleep.

“Dinner time,” I said brightly.

He shook his head and flipped me off. “Told you I’m not hungry,” he grumped.

“I don’t care. At least drink the broth and the tea. I put in honey and lemon for your throat,” I said as I sat down beside him. “And if you won’t eat it yourself, I’ll feed you.”

I got him to eat half the soup and most of a cup of tea before I gave up. I made him take his medication and then went out to the kitchen. I dumped the leftovers and put the dishes in the sink to be washed later. I checked on the washer and since it still had over twenty minutes left, I reheated the rest of the soup for myself. By the time I’d finished eating and washed up the dirty dishes, it was time to load the comforter in the dryer.

I had an hour to kill before it was done, so I went back to check on Dieter. He was asleep, so I very quietly changed into my nightshirt and curled up on the couch to watch some TV while I waited for the dryer to finish. Two episodes of “The Big Bang Theory” later, I fetched the toasty warm comforter from the laundry room and headed to the bedroom.

I pulled the summer duvet off the bed and threw the warm comforter over Dieter. He woke up. “Whad you doin’?,” he mumbled.

I crawled under the covers. “Nice warm blankie,” I said, snuggling down. “Go back to sleep.”

He grunted and coughed, then reached for the box of tissues I’d left on his nightstand. He blew his nose loudly and slumped back onto the pillows with a groan. “You should sleep in the guest roob,” he said. “You’ll ged sick.”

I kicked him gently. “Like I haven’t already been around your germs all evening,” I replied. “Besides, this way I’m here if you need anything.”  I curled up, enjoying the warmth of the freshly laundered comforter. Despite Dieter’s coughs and sniffles, I fell asleep pretty quickly. It had been a long day.

***************************

I woke up at 3:00 am when Dieter had a coughing fit. “Sorry, sorry,” he said in between hacking coughs. “Shit.”

“It’s okay,” I said. I measured out a dose of cough syrup and fetched him a glass of ice water to wash it down with. “Take this.”  He made a face but swallowed the medicine. I didn’t blame him; that stuff tasted nasty. Cherry flavor my ass.

“Come here,” I said, after he’d drunk half the glass of water to get the taste out of his mouth. I opened a jar of Vicks VapoRub and pushed his t-shirt up. “This will help.” I started rubbing the greasy ointment in small circles over his chest. I suppressed the urge to sing “Soft Kitty,” knowing that Dieter would not understand. He’d watched “The Big Bang Theory” with me a few times but claimed he didn't get it.

Once I’d coated his chest, I pulled the shirt back down and started rubbing Vicks on his throat. “I know it smells horrible, but it works,” I said as he blinked from the pungent fumes. I chuckled. “Just be glad my friend Carla’s mom isn’t around. When I had sleepovers at her house when I was little, she rubbed Vicks on our feet and made us wear white socks to bed. Even if we weren’t sick.”

I put the lid back on the jar and smeared the leftover ointment on his stomach, just to be a jerk. He grumped at me and I pressed a kiss on his belly, just below where I’d rubbed the Vicks. 

“Not in the mood,” he grumbled. 

I pretended to pout. “You’re no fun,” I said. I put the jar of Vicks back on the nightstand, leaning across him to reach it. I knew that in that position, he could see right down my sleep shirt, and it was riding up at the bottom to show off my panties but he didn’t react at all.  “You really are sick,” I said, patting his cheek. “Go back to sleep.”

He just grunted and then coughed in my face. “Sorry,” he mumbled, as I crawled back over to my side of the bed. “I know this isn’t fun for you.”

“I’m not here to have fun,” I told him. “I’m here to take care of you. Now shut up and go back to sleep.”

**************************************************

The next day I spent most of my time running back and forth from the kitchen to the bedroom. He wanted coffee but then it made his stomach hurt. He wanted toast but then only ate half of it. I made him tea with honey but it got cold too fast, and when I heated it in the microwave it was too hot and burned his tongue. Every time he took a dose of medicine, he needed fresh ice water. 

For lunch, I suggested grilled cheese, my go-to meal when I was feeling sick as a kid. He took two bites. It was like taking care of a nearly six foot toddler. 

“You have to eat, sweetie,” I told him. “All that medicine on an empty stomach isn’t good for you.”

“I’m not fucking hungry,” he growled. “Just leave me alone, okay?”

“Fine, Mr. Grumpy Pants,” I said. I took the remains of his lunch out to the kitchen, cut off the part he’d bitten and finished the sandwich myself. I knew he didn’t feel well, but it was starting to wear on me. I pulled out my phone and texted Sam.

ME: Dieter is driving me crazy. Why are men such babies when they’re sick?

She replied quickly with a series of laughing emojis.

We commiserated about the tribulations of taking care of a man-child until I heard a pathetic voice calling my name from the bedroom. I took the phone with me as I went to see what he wanted.

“I’m hungry,” he said. “Can I have that sandwich now?”

I texted Sam as I went back out to the kitchen to make a fresh grilled cheese.

ME: Can I divorce someone I’m not married to yet?

Her only reply was another string of laughing emojis.

**************************************************

The next morning, Dieter still had a low grade fever and his cough was no better. “I think we need to go to urgent care,” I told him.

“I’m fine,” he whined. “I hate the doctor.”

“But I don’t think this cough syrup is strong enough,” I replied. “You might need the prescription stuff. Get dressed.”

He grumped and complained but changed into jeans and a clean t-shirt while I called the closest urgent care that took his insurance. They wouldn’t make an appointment but claimed the wait time was currently less than an hour. “Is your phone charged? We might have a bit of a wait,” I asked.

It took twenty minutes to find his phone, which had slipped down between the couch cushions at some point. The battery was at 45%, so I had to fetch the car charger from his car before we could leave. Fortunately, it took long enough to get to the urgent care that his phone was up to 70% by the time we were parked. I knew he’d get bored sitting in the waiting room if he didn’t have his phone to play with. It really is like taking care of a giant toddler, I thought. 

The waiting room was three quarters full and when we checked in, the receptionist told me in a bored voice that it would probably be close to ninety minutes before we could see a doctor. “We had a couple of soccer injuries come in and they got jumped to the head of the line,” she explained. “Fill out the forms and have a seat.”

*****************************************

“Mr. Bravo?,” a nurse finally called out. I nudged Dieter, who had started to doze off.

“What?”

“It’s your turn. Come on,” I said.

We followed the nurse into the back. She kept giving him curious looks as she sat him down at her station to start taking his vitals. “I’m sorry,” she said after a minute. “It’s just …”

“It’s okay,” I said. “He’s used to being stared at.”

Dieter started to say something smart but veered into another coughing fit.

The nurse nodded and patted him on the shoulder. “Don’t try to talk.” She handed him some tissues and went back to laying out her instruments. She took his temperature, blood pressure and checked his blood oxygen levels.

“Slight fever, and the coughing has the blood pressure up a bit, but ox levels are good,” the nurse said as she jotted things down on a form. “Okay, let’s put you in a room and the doctor will be with you soon.”

She led us into an examination room. Dieter slumped on the exam table, the paper crinkling and crunching underneath him. I settled in an uncomfortable chair and we waited. And waited.

“This is ridiculous,” Dieter said after we’d been in the exam room for nearly twenty minutes. “We’re wasting our time.”

“No we’re not,” I said.  “Just be patient.” I chuckled. “Get it, you’re a patient … so you need to be patient.”

He just shook his head and flipped me off. So much for making him laugh. 

The doctor finally came in, a flustered looking young Indian woman. “So sorry for the wait,” she said. “I’m Dr. Pradesh. We’re short staffed today because of this flu.” She looked at the file in her hand. “Which you appear to have, Mr. Bravo.” She smiled apologetically.

She quickly examined Dieter, looking in his ears, up his nose, and listening to his heart and lungs. “Okay,” she said when she was done. “Lungs are definitely congested but I don’t hear anything too concerning.” She pulled out a prescription pad. “I’m going to get you some cough syrup with codeine, which should help. It’s stronger than the over the counter stuff you’ve been taking. And an inhaler to open up the bronchial passages.” She turned to me.

“I take it you’re looking after him,” she said. I nodded. “Rest, lots of fluids, make sure he takes his meds,” she said, ticking each item off on her fingers. “This virus usually runs its course in about two weeks, but the first week is the worst. He should start feeling better in a few days.”

She handed me the prescription form and smiled at Dieter. “I hope you feel better, Mr. Bravo,” she said. “If your symptoms get worse, call us or your primary doctor.” She shook his hand, then mine, and was gone.

The nurse popped in a moment later with some paperwork in her hand. “Okay, you’re ready to go.” She hesitated a moment. “Um, I know you aren’t feeling well, but … do you think I could get an autograph?”

Dieter sighed, but smiled and took the pen she shyly offered. He scribbled his signature on a scrap of paper and we were on our way.

“Sorry,” I said as we buckled ourselves into the car. 

“For what?”

“You feel like crap and still got accosted by a fan,” I said.

He shrugged. “She was very polite about it. I wouldn’t call it being accosted.”

“Still,” I said, as I backed the car out of the parking space. “I know it’s annoying.”

“Not your fault,” he said, before starting to cough violently again. 

We stopped at CVS on the way home. “You can wait in the car if you don’t feel like going in,” I told him and after a moment he nodded.

“If you don’t mind,” he said. He looked exhausted. I kissed him on the forehead and held out my hand for his wallet.

Fortunately the pharmacy had no line and I got his prescriptions after a short wait. Still, Dieter was asleep by the time I got back to the car. He was slumped in the passenger seat, his mouth hanging slightly open. I felt a sudden surge of love for him. Despite the way he’d been driving me crazy, I knew it was the virus that made him so grumpy and needy. All I wanted was for him to feel better.

I got into the car as quietly as I could, but he still woke up. “I’m awake,” he mumbled as he sat up straighter. 

“You’re fine, babe,” I told him, placing the pharmacy bag on his lap. “Now let’s get you home.”

*****************************

“Are you sure you don’t want to stay in the guest room?” Dieter asked after I’d gotten him home, back in pajamas, into bed, fed, and medicated.

“Why? Are you sick of me already? Get it? Sick.” I asked. I hopped onto the bed next to him.

“Fuck off,” he said, shaking his head.

“I’m not going anywhere” I told him. “Got to take care of you, sweetie.” I kissed him on the cheek. 

“You don’t have to do that,” he said. “I’ll be fine. I’m not a kid,” he grumped, but I could see a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. He liked the idea of me taking care of him.

“You’re acting like one,” I retorted. “Everyone does, when they’re sick. And what does a sick kid want most? To be taken care of.” I slid my arm around his shoulders and pulled him close. “Which is exactly what I’m going to do.”

“I love you,” he mumbled into my hair.

“I love you, too,” I replied. “But please don’t get snot in my hair.”

He started laughing, which turned into another coughing fit. I patted his back and handed him a cough drop from my pocket. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay,” he said when he stopped coughing. “Thanks for taking such good care of me.”

“It’s my job,” I said. He raised an eyebrow at me. “It’s in the fiancé job description. Section fourteen, paragraph five. ‘Take care of him when he’s sick, even if he acts like a giant baby.’”

“Very funny,” he said. “Now, what does it say in that job description about doing my laundry?”

I sighed. It was going to be a long week. 

**************************************************

“How the hell is it already February 18th?” Dieter was feeling better and was catching up on emails. 

“Well, first it was February 1st, and then days went by …”

He gave me the stink-eye. “Ha ha, very funny,” he said. “I missed Valentine’s Day. I had stuff planned and everything.”

“It’s no big deal,” I told him. “Valentine’s Day is a very overrated holiday, anyway. To be honest, it was nice not to be surrounded by teenagers carrying around balloons and stuffed animals and all that stupid shit.”

“But it was our first Valentine’s Day together, and I missed it,” Dieter said. “That doesn’t bode well.” He frowned. 

“I don’t need chocolates or flowers or any of that stuff,” I reassured him. “I’m just glad you’re feeling better. And we can do something special next year, if you want.” I was going through my own emails, which included several from Oladele offering suggestions for wedding venues. Without me even realizing it, she had been hired as my personal assistant and I already didn’t know what I would do without her. “Hey, speaking of flowers, do you think we need some for the wedding?” Oladele had gotten some quotes from florists.

“What? That’s months away,” Dieter said.

”June is only four months away and it’ll be here before we know it,” I replied. “We really need to sit down and go over things. Like where, when, and who’s invited. And flowers, food, cake …” I sighed. “Even for a low key wedding, there’s a lot to think about.”

Dieter waved his hand in the air. “Get some roses, a cake with white frosting, a few bottles of champagne and sparkling cider … boom! A wedding.”

”You’re no help.”

”My head’s still full of mucus and shit,” he said. “Give me a couple of days and then we’ll sit down and go over stuff.” I could tell he was getting tired and grumpy and I cut him some slack. I knew from experience that the flu took a lot out of you.

**************************************************

Two days later, I went grocery shopping. Dieter’s appetite had come back and we were completely out of snacks. When I got home, I opened the front door to the scent of roses. “What the hell? Dieter, can I get some help with the groceries?”

There was no reply and I stepped further in. There were bouquets of roses all over the living room, dozens and dozens of roses: red, white, pink, and silver, in glass vases tied with ribbons. A large heart shaped box of chocolates was in the center of the coffee table, next to a teddy bear holding a red velvet heart that read “I ❤️U.”

”Dieter!” I yelled. “Where are you and why did a drug store Valentine’s aisle throw up in our living room?”

He appeared in the doorway, wearing a red satin robe over black silk pajamas. “I told you I had plans,” he said, batting his eyelashes at me.

”Well, can we get the groceries in and put away first?”

He sighed and stumbled off to find his Crocs. “You have no sense of romance,” he grumped.

Once we’d fetched the food and put everything away, I let Dieter lead me back to the living room. “Have a seat, my sweet,” he said, with a deep bow. He pulled a fancy box from underneath the couch and placed it in my lap. I untied the red velvet ribbon and opened the box to reveal a lacy black silk nightgown and red satin robe that matched his. “You go change into that,” he said, “and I’ll get the rest of your surprise ready.”

I normally preferred cotton night clothes but the feel of the silk and satin against my skin was sensual. Not exactly something I’d want to wear all night, but it definitely set the stage for sexy times. So I was truly surprised when I went back into the living room and found Dieter with his glasses on and a notebook in his hand.

”What’s going on?”

”I am about to do the most romantic thing any man has ever done,” he said dramatically. He picked up the remote. “I’m going to turn off the television and give you my undivided attention and we are going to plan our wedding.” He nodded toward the coffee table, where both of our iPads were turned on and nestled amongst a selection of brochures. “Oladele sent me all her stuff.”

I sank onto the couch. “You never cease to amaze me, Dieter Fucking Bravo.” 

“We’ll get to that part later,” he said with a wink. “Right now, let’s plan a wedding.”

Two hours — and a bag of chips and several of the chocolates from the fancy box — later, we had a rough plan. A secular ceremony on the beach, small reception with finger foods and cake, not too many flowers (because of the wind off the ocean). Freddy would be his best man and Sam would be my maid of honor. We even narrowed it down to three venues: a public beach that had an area that could be reserved for private functions, a private beach that could be rented for a hefty fee but included catering, and the backyard of a producer friend of Dieter’s, which backed onto a private beach.

”Okay, so guest list,” I said, scanning the checklist that Oladele had sent us. “Freddy, Leila and the kids, that’s four. And Sam, her husband and kids, that’s another five, so we’re up to nine.”

”Dominic and his family,” Dieter said. “That brings us to thirteen. Oh, and Oladele. That’s fourteen.”

”Carmen,” I said. “That’s fifteen.”

Dieter named a few other people from “the business” which brought our total up to twenty three. “How about your family? Just your aunt and uncle or do we have to invite all the cousins, too?”

”Just Aunt Helen and Uncle Jeremiah,” I said. “We’ll put them up at a fancy hotel, just to make her squirm a little.” I laughed. “Actually, I think she’ll enjoy it. I don’t think they’ve had a real vacation, just the two of them, in forever.”

Dieter nodded. “That’s twenty five. That’s a good number, unless you want to invite anyone from your old job?”

”Don’t forget your dad,” I added. “That makes twenty six.” Dieter made a face. “Look, I know you aren’t on the best of terms with him but there is no way he’s not coming to our wedding. Between the two of us we only have one parent living, and he has to be there.”

Dieter pursed his lips. “It’ll be twenty seven if he comes,” he said tersely, “because he’ll bring her.”

”Her?”

”His wife.”

“I didn’t know you had a stepmother.”

”She’s not my stepmother,” Dieter said fiercely. “She’s his wife.”

”Sorry. Is she that bad?”

He shook his head and sighed. “No, actually, she’s pretty great. Just a normal, nice lady who loves him and …” He closed his eyes. “Freddy’s kids call her Grandma. Which is fine. It’s just …”

”I get it,” I said, taking his hand in mine. I never stopped being amazed at how big his hands were. Dieter was a big man, strong — and very fragile. “I wish your mom could be there. My parents, too. They would have loved you.”

He lifted my hand to his lips. “I wish I could have met them. And my mom — I know she was problematic. I know she was selfish and Dad was better off after she left but damn it, I loved her so much.”

I let him cry against my shoulder. “I know. I know. She was your mom.” I rubbed his back and waited until he was able to compose himself. He sat back, his eyes red and his nose streaming snot. I handed him a tissue from the box that was still on the coffee table from his cold.

He blew his nose and wiped his face. “Probably not the best time to try to seduce you, huh?” His smile was tentative, but it was genuine.

”Actually, I kind of like the blotchy-faced, snot-nosed look,” I said. I shoved his notebook away and straddled his lap. With only two thin layers of silk between us, I could feel every inch of his body beneath me.

”Good, ‘cause it’s my signature look,” he said, his hands sliding down to grip my hips.

And that was the end of wedding planning for the time being. After all, June was months and months away.

[cwritesforfun]

TSITP: Conrad Fisher x Fem!Reader: this is me trying

Inspired by the song this is me trying by Taylor Swift and some songs from folklore and just Taylor Swift songs in general so let me know if you like this style of quick story:) here is a link to the song 

Y/N = Your Name & S/N = Sister’s Name ** I do not own the TSITP characters or plot!** Yes, I do change the plot a bit.

Lyrics from songs in italics - let me know how many songs you can count

Y/N’s POV

Cousins Beach has always been a beautiful place to visit over the summer. My family has been friends with the Fisher and Conklin families since I was young. I was always closest with Belly, as we were the only two girls besides our moms. Steven was friendly enough. Jeremiah always knew to bring the party to us and was there if you asked, But, Conrad, Conrad was there no matter what. I never had to ask. When the rest of the kids walked together, he would walk by me so I didn’t have to walk alone. He would help me calm my anxiety by walking on the beach with me. He would save me from uncomfortable social situations. When my dad died, he would text me every week (I told him every day was too much). I truly appreciated him more than he ever would know because when I break it's in a million pieces. I was hurting so much, but I had him. My family sold our old home when my father died, but Laurel lets us stay with their family every summer now. It was very sweet of her to do that and it also means endless summer sleepovers with Belly. It can be a little mentally taxing to not have a space to decompress after a long day socializing, so I tend to go on runs after dinner around the beach. My twin sister, S/N, joined me once, but now she prefers partying with Steven.

This year, everything is different. Belly is being entered into the debutante ball. I went a few years ago and my escort was Conrad. I wonder who will take her this year. Susannah has breast cancer and I can tell it’s taking a toll on Conrad a lot. I’ve tried to talk to him about it, but he keeps pushing me away. 

Dinner tonight has been tense. Belly somehow snuck out to the party at the beach. And it's hard to be at a party when I feel like an open wound. I was there because S/N wanted me as her moral support if she was rejected by guys or girls, but I mainly hung out with Jeremiah because he’s funny to watch when he gets drunk. I did see Conrad drinking and smoking off to the side. He glared at me when I got another drink. I'm still trying everything to keep you looking at me. No idea what his problem is. He won’t talk to me. It's hard to be anywhere these days when all I want is you...

And since that happened, the family is torn. Belly was in no real danger since I was with her at the party and watching over her, but my family didn’t like the idea of a small girl watching another small girl. They said it was unsafe for us to be alone, even though we were with other people at the party. Conrad’s parents got mad because he was supposed to watch everyone as the “oldest” sibling there. The funny thing is, Conrad and I are the same age.

I watch as Conrad storms outside after dinner. I watch his dad follows him outside. Susannah leans over to me and says “Go outside and check on Conrad, will you? I know his father can be a bit direct and Conrad doesn’t always respond best to that. He’ll need you.” I get up and walk through the back door outside. I hear Mr. Fisher say in a slightly raised voice “You’re the oldest. You’re supposed to look out for the younger kids.” UH OH! I exclaim “Technically, we’re the same age.” Conrad says “Go away, Y/N.” Mr. Fisher says “Conrad, apologize right now.” I reply “It’s okay, Mr. Fisher. Um... could you tell my mom I’m going on a run and I’ll be back after?” He nods and I storm past them to the house. 

I change, put my headphones on, and run on the beach. I collapse on the beach at the end and put my feet in the cold wet sand. It feels amazing here. I take off my headphones and watch the waves wash over the beach. It’s weird but fuckin’ beautiful. 

I hear footsteps and wonder who they sent to check on me. I hear “May I join you?” I see Conrad and I ask “Oh so you finally want to talk to me now?” And my words shoot to kill when I’m mad. I have a lot of regret about that.  Conrad sits then asks “Uhh something like that. I’m sorry. Do you want water? I figured you would be thirsty after the run. I was waiting to see you run by.” I reply “I will gladly accept, thanks, Conrad.” He replies “Of course.”

I look at the water and exclaim “Sorry for snapping a minute ago. I just get in my head sometimes and I know it was rude of me to say that. If you didn’t want to talk, I shouldn’t have tried to push you.” He replies “It’s alright. You’re the only one who cares enough to try.” I look at him and see tears staining his cheeks. I reach over and we hug. He rests his head in the crook of my neck and just lets all his tears out. I can tell he has been holding them back by how his tears ricochet. 

Eventually, Conrad pulls away from the hug and says “Everyone either doesn’t try to talk to me or they seem afraid of me. I feel like I’ve lost everyone and I have no one left. No one makes me feel like I’m worth anything. I just ... I’m hurting and I miss when days were better. My dad ... he said that I should’ve been a better example. He could smell the alcohol on my breath and he wants me to shape up. He doesn’t see that this is me trying.” I take his hands in mine and say “Conrad Fisher, you’re worth more than gold. You have a wonderful beautiful soul and you deserve so much happiness. I’m sorry to hear how you’ve been feeling, but I want you to know I’m here for you. I’m here for a crying session, a good escape from reality, and I can beat up someone for you if you need me to.” He half smiles and says “But you’re a small girl and they’re not good at defending themselves.” Ahahaha throwing our parent’s words at each other, are we? I half smile and say “And you’re just the oldest sibling who too many people expect too much from.” He nods and says “It’s too much.” I reply “The past few years, when times were tough and I didn’t see a reason to keep going, you were the light in my life. You were a person who helped me see how wonderful life could be amidst the worry and grief. This place on the beach is where we would often find each other when my anxiety got really bad. I don’t know if you remember. But... this is our spot where we let go and allow ourselves to really feel what we feel.” He looks out and wraps his arm around my shoulders. I lean against him and I feel his arms tracing patterns on my arm. We talk more and the sun fully sets.

I pull away from him and we stand up. We start walking back to the house and Conrad exclaims “Thank you for letting me talk and feel and be myself. I would be lying if I said that was it for my problems.” I stop walking and ask “What’s wrong, Conrad?” He stops, looks down at the ground, and says “Nothing is wrong. Well to me, it’s not wrong. It’s stupid really. I don’t know why I feel the need to tell you because it could mean I lose you.” I take his hands in mine and say “You’re scaring me, Conrad. Please tell me what can’t you tell me that means I no longer want in your life.” He replies “I am so very in love with you, Y/N.” HOLY BLEEPING WHAT?!?!?  He quickly drops my hands and says “Just forget I said that, please. We’ll be friends and I can move on. Just don’t tell everyone please.” I put my hands on both sides of his face and say “I love you too, you big idiot.” He smiles and we kiss. Love you to the moon and to Saturn Passed down like folk songs The love lasts so long...

[bullet-prooflove]

Making Memories - Johnny 'Coco' Cruz x Reader

Written for my badass writing biatch @the-hinky-panda

Tagging:   @annetje   @danzer8705  @im-just-a-mississippi-girl

It had been a long time since you had been the beach. The two of you sat side by side on the sand, watching the water creep up the shore. Coco’s arm was wrapped around your shoulders, drawing you into the heat of his body. His lips brushed over the side of your head as the sky began to darken. There was just the two of you in this moment, this wonderful perfect moment.

"You know this is going to cause all sorts of rumours back at the clubhouse." You teased, your palm coming to rest upon his knee. "Overnight stay in a one-man tent away from them all. They’ll think you’re a romantic."

“Fuck em,” he smiled into your hair. “I don’t care what they think.”

You laughed and Coco thought, somehow in the glow of the sunset you looked even more beautiful. He loved seeing her happy, loved the way you made the world feel just a little bit lighter. You picked up a seashell toying with it between your fingers.

"Did you ever used to do that thing where you pick up a seashell and listen to the sound of the ocean?" You questioned as you cupped it to your ear.

Coco shook his head, holding out his own hand for the shell. He had heard of it a thousand times before, but he had never stopped to find out. You placed it in his palm before Coco brought it to his ear, frowning at the roaring sound emitting from the depths of the seashell.

"I always thought that was one of those rumours you hear as a kid.” Coco said handing the shell back to her.

"You know EZ probably could probably tell us there’s some amazing scientific reason behind it but I like keeping the magic of it." You told Coco cupping the seashell between your hands.

"I’ve got something for you." Coco said abruptly, raising to his feet.

He returned from his bike quickly with a box clasped in his hands when he sat back down again. You studied him quizzically as he held it out to you. You took it, setting the gift down on your lap before studying it with curious fingertips.

The gun metal grey lockbox was heavy. There were a few faded stickers stuck to the lid. The corners were rounded and there was a heavy-duty lock on the front. Coco jangled the keys before taking your hand in his and placing them upon your palm.

The lockbox was something he'd had in his possession since his teenage years. Something he used to store his special items in before Celia either sold them or trashed them. It’d had it with him for years, keeping pictures in there of his kids, of Letty. These days he didn’t have to worry about someone rooting through his stuff, looking for things to sell for their next fix, or destroy just to hurt him. It was his most treasured possession in the world and now he was giving it to the most precious person in the world.

"I thought it was time you started to make some new memories." Coco said quietly, nudging your shoulder with his. “You can put the stuff in there, that’s special to you.”

He watched as you unlocked the box with your new set of keys. You opened the lid before she took the seashell and deposited it in the lockbox. He could see how much it meant to you to receive a gift like this. That cute little side smile was making an appearance once more as it curved across your beautiful features. Your fingertip smoothed over the sticker of a skull before you closed it once more and locked it.

"Now it has our first memory." You told him, beaming as you tilted your head to look up at him.

Jesus, you had no idea what you did to him. When you looked at him like that, when you reached out and allowed your thumb to brush along the darkening stubble on his cheeks. Coco's lips grazed the palm of your hand as you met his eyes.

"Thank you for this.” You whispered. "Thank you for all of this."

Love Coco? Don’t miss any of his stories by joining the taglist here.

Like My Work? - Why Not Buy Me A Coffee

[bxbu-chuu]

He’s trying his absolute best to remind himself why he’s so in love with Hinata, he keeps listing all the good qualities he’s ever seen in him while he looks around- barely hiding his annoyance. Let’s see, he’s funny, he’s reliable, he gets him like no one else, he’s an amazing volleyball player with great determination, he’s crazy hot- where the fuck is he. 

Tooru’s blood is boiling, he’s been in love with that little fucker since they met in that beach in Rio 2 years ago, and just now, with the reality of him going back to Japan dawning on him he’s mustered the courage to make a move. He really thought he was being smooth with it, he had pictured the scene a dozen times. Him, looking all suave and cool, having waited until New Year’s Eve to kiss Shoyo at midnight and tell him how he really felt. 

The reality is comically different, Shoyo had shoved his champagne flute in Tooru’s hand like ten minutes ago and taken off to take a piss. Ten minutes was definitely too long for someone to pee, and Tooru’s teammate’s party wasn’t big enough for there to be any lines at the bathroom. He accepted reality, Shoyo had probably bumped into someone he had no business knowing- they were in Argentina, how did he know more people than Tooru did?. He’s probably talking that someone’s ear off right now. Tooru looks at the clock on the wall, 11:58 PM. Great. Amazing. Cool. 

He’s debating whether to go out looking for Shoyo or not. He’s stupid enough to just let midnight pass by without even realizing, so maybe he should, but if he moves and Shoyo comes back to where they were they will definitely not find each other before 12. He ultimately decides to just stay put and hope for him to come back. He watches as the hands of the clock move and eventually everyone around him starts excitedly screaming a countdown. When they reach the end the room erupts in congratulatory screaming and cheering and Tooru bitterly drinks out of his flute. 

It’s then, and only then, that he can make out a wild head of bright orange hair quickly making his way toward him through the crowd. He sees Shoyo, in all his badly ironed suit glory, basically sprinting in his direction and he’s somehow more angry. Why is he running now? Why did he look so good? Why couldn’t Tooru have fallen for someone less irritating?

“You’re literally the worst. I had to stand here with two flutes looking like an aba-” His complaining is cut short when Shoyo basically crashes into him, knocking all the champagne out of the flutes as their lips connect. Shoyo’s warm and rough hands are holding both sides of Tooru’s face and the frustration evaporates off him. They part and he just looks at Shoyo in shock, waiting for some kind of explanation. 

“I can’t believe I messed this up! I had it all planned in my head I was going to be all cool- but I’ve been holding my pee all night and I really had to go, and then I bumped into Javier and he was showing pictures of his kids- it’s like, so rude to tell him to stop telling me about his kids… you know?” 

“You’re so annoying” Tooru says and leans in again to kiss him again, they have two years of lost time to make up for.

[nctangelz]

SPREAD OUR WINGS — EP.1 :: TRAVEL WITH MOCHI MONI ☀️🌊

note :: italics are in english!

THE VLOG STARTS with monique sitting in her bed, still in her silk pj’s and messy hair. SHES SO GIRLFIEND!!!!

“good morninggggg, nctzens!” monique yawns, stretching and climbing out of her bed. she placed her camera on her desk infront of her window, waving at the camera before she walks around her room. she grabs her clothes and runs away to her bathroom, singing EASY by nct angelz.

once moni returns, she’s dressed in her oversized sweatshirt she got from her harry styles concert, sweatpants and her favorite black cap! nctzens could see a man poke out in the corner of the room with black short hair, unfortunately his face was blurred so we’ll never know who this mysterious man was 💔…but he tags along! moni is the queen of mystery & suspense.

“today, i am awake very early to catch a flight to jeju island!!” monique shares, yawning while she reaches over to grab her makeup bag. “typically, i book night flights…but i can only stay in jeju for a few days, so im going to make the most of it!” moni shares, massaging her face with her mosturizer and sunscreen.

“i’m going to apply some concealer just to make me look a little more alive….i got eleven hours of sleep and i still look like i got none.” monique sighs, “that’s what years of insomnia do to you,” monique chuckles, applying her makeup. ( YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL MONI! ).

“i’m going to put some mascara and lip gloss on and then im going to leave…hopefully i have enough time to grab coffee and a snack before my flight takes off.” monique says, grabbing her camera and going to her living room, sliding her sneakers on and grabbing her duffle bag. “i parked my stuff right by the door last night - that way i can get up and go!”

monique and the mysterious man made their way out of her apartment, climbing in the taxi and driving towards the airport. “i’ll update you once i get on my plane!”

the vlog resumed by monique showing her view outside of the window, with the plane soaring through the clouds. “hello, mochizens! (she’s adorable) if you’re wondering, i got some coffee and some breakfast before i took off, so im all fed and happy!” monique whispered, setting her camera down on her table infront of her. “i land in about twenty minutes, so i’m going to fix my hair!”

monique took her cap off and widen her eyes at the frizzy hairs, frantically pushing her hair down. “my hair is wild!” monique states, brushing her hair and separating it into two sections. “ever since i was a kid, i had crazy hair. it never does well in the heat, so im going to braid it to attempt to contain it.”

monique showed herself braiding her hair, pulling out her tiny baby hairs and waving to camera when she was done. “am i so pretty?” monique asks, posing infront of the camera. “im going to keep my makeup as it is…i think once we— i get settled im going to go to the beach and have a swim!”

“the first time i ever went to jeju was right after my debut…johnny, jaehyun and I saved our money up and booked a trip to jeju as soon as time allowed! it was so nice to have a relaxing trip after having really busy schedule and working really hard…we didn’t stay in the nicest hotel and we weren’t able to eat out at any restaurants but we still had fun! i remember johnny would wake jaehyun and i up everyday by singing beyoncé and throwing our swimsuits at us.” monique giggled, scrolling through her phone to find some pictures.

“we were so young! look at what babies we were!” monique laughs, showing the camera an old picture of the trio, the three of them standing on the beach together…monique on the middle with the boys on the side of her. “how old would we be? johnny and i were around 21…jaehyun was only 19! that’s crazzzyyyy.”

“i never traveled a lot growing up, but i’ve been able to go visit nctzens in so many other countries and explore their countries…and it’s amazing! i love traveling! this is going to be my third time visiting jeju…i think. in 2019 my cousin came to visit me and we took a trip to jeju!”

“i’m landing in a couple minutes, so ill see you at the beach!”

monique brings the vlog back by showing the beautiful view at the beach, zooming in at the beautiful ocean. she later flipped the camera, bringing it up to show nctzens her swimsuit. there was another apperance from the mysterious man…his hand was resting on monique’s hip but quickly moved when he saw the camera. “it’s so bright out here!” monique says, bring her camera down to put her sunglasses down. “i’m going to swim for a bit…and then go to this beach bar!”

monique inserted a few clips of the ocean, her walking on the beach, and eventually, her at the beach bar in her coverup, sipping on her drink. “i never drank on a ocean before…it’s nice!” monique shares, bringing her drink up to show the viewers. “strawberry daiquiri…tasty.”

“the sun is setting now…so the heat isn’t too crazy anymore. i don’t like drinking when it’s hot out…i had a bad experience doing it when i was young and naive.” monique chuckles, “i sound like a grandma…i bet haechan would have mocked me if he was here.”

“i just became an adult and was drinking outside in the middle of the summer with my friends…and i got really hot and passed out…it wasn’t fun.” monique shared, “listen to your bodies and don’t surpass your limit, kids.”

monique kept sipping on her drink, playing with her hair in the process. “i feel really relaxed, nctzens! after you finish watching this, go do something that brings you peace!”

monique finished her drink, gently placing it down and sitting back in her seat, admiring the view infront of her. the vlog goes in fast pace, showing monique walking on a trail through the beach and the mountains, returning to normal pace once monique is back to her rental.

“this rental is really nice and big!” monique exclaims, now dressed in a pink night dress, her hair put up in a claw clip. “it’s really close to the beach, and it has a bunch of windows!” monique says, turning her camera to show wall length windows in her living room, giving her a wonderful view of the beach. “i would love to live in a place like this one day,” monique shares, giving a brief tour of the living room, “i could have movie nights with my kids in this living room and show them my favorite movies! look at these speakers, it would be like your in the movies!” monique giggles turning the camera back to her face. “and then when we are done watching movies, i’ll show them my favorite videos of the members!”

moni then walked to her room, showing the viewers her big bed and the ocean view! “nctzens, i’m going to get some rest after this long day…thank you for tuning in! i hope you all get to take some nice and relaxing vacations this year!” monique says, smiling and waving to the camera, blowing kisses before ending the vlog.

1.8M VIEWS, 1M LIKES, 100K COMMENTS

uploaded in june, 2023

WANT TO READ SOME COMMENTS?

WHO IS THIS MAN? and don’t be telling me it’s her manager CUZ DID U SEE THE HAND PLACEMENT? 🧎 moni is getting treated right

i feel like i’m interrupting…why did SM make her record on her romantic getaway..poor girl

the editors did her dirty…they caused a whole scandal for their carelessness

moni sharing her memories with nctzens is so 🥺🥺 she loves her boys sm

THIS VLOG ISNT LONG ENOUGH! I WANT A WHOLE MOVIE DEDICATED TO MOCHI TALKING ABOUT HER MEMBERS AND HER FUTURE FAMILY

tags :: @yjjnfied

[cantevenbeachhere]

for the writing prompt:

Paint - Artist Ken //(Ken-Ncuti)

~☕👍

Hey! Great choice! I know exactly what story to tell you!

One of the funnest things about the Kens getting a big Mojo Dojo Casa House was the fact we all could decorate our spaces how we wanted! And for us, that was a big deal because it’s a first for all of us. We’ve never gotten to decorate a home before. So there was a whole lot of buzz around the place as we planned and did whatever we wanted for our spaces.

But I don’t think anybody was more excited about this part than Artist Ken. “My whole life has led to this moment,” he declared with this big, bright look in his eyes. I swear his grin was as big as Barbie Land.

He volunteered to paint everybody’s space as they wanted, and we all had a lot of ideas. But since he’s the expert, we all asked for his opinions too.

“Ken, what do you think about this color combination?”

“Uh hey, Ken? How many colors can I use? And do you think this color matches Beach pretty well?”

“Ken! Is there such a thing as sparkly paint? How would that look on the walls? Too much?”

“Hey, Ken, can you pick a color to best match this blanket I’ve got? It’s my favorite, ya know.”

Dude, I mean, If there’s a cloud above cloud nine? Artist Ken was on it.

Cool Ken’s space ended up being the most messy because he kept changing his mind on what colors he wanted. I was getting really annoyed by it. “C’mon, Ken, you’ve changed your mind more than anyone else here!”

“And that’s saying something,” Artist Ken muttered to himself.

My best friend Ken pointed out, “It’s not like it’s going to be stuck like this forever, you know. You can change it again if you want.”

“Later,” I added. “Much later.”

“I just want it to be amazing,” Cool Ken explained with a huff.

And I just rolled my eyes. “Your space has been covered in hand prints and random paint streaks for weeks, dude. Just pick something so Ken can move on with whatever else he wants to work on!”

“I will! I think I’ve finally figured it out!”

“Thank goodness!” I sighed out.

Cool Ken declared, “I was right the first time. I think I want it with the color combo I chose first. Never doubt your gut instincts, guys.”

I gave Artist Ken a look that said You’ve got to be kidding me. But! He wasn’t even looking at me. He was staring at the random hand prints on the walls. “Hey man, whatcha thinking about?”

He looked at me with an excited grin and said, “I think I’ve figured something out too.”

“What’s that?”

He looked back at the hands and asked, “What better way to make this place ours by leaving our mark?”

Cool Ken asked, “Isn’t that what we’re doing?”

But Artist Ken only laughed.

It wasn’t until our individual spaces were finished that we started decorating the community spaces, especially the living room. We have this big long wall behind the couches and chairs that we left white at Artist Ken’s insistence. Then we each picked one color, painted our hands with our chosen color, and placed our handprints all over that wall. It looks sooooooo cool.

“Dude,” I said with a big grin as I wrapped an arm around his shoulders, “you’re a genius!”

He patted my own shoulder with the proudest grin I’ve ever seen on his face. “Thanks, man.”

Best friend Ken called from right behind us, “Uhhh guys? You both know you’ve left handprints on each other’s clothes, right?”

One shot asks

[mymoodwriting]

1.2k, established relationship, drifting apart, relationship issues, loneliness, reader death, mourning, loss, sad ending

“I’d like you to name it.”

    It felt like an honor, but you also had to think about it seriously. You knew Doyoung was good at his profession, and if he was asking you to name one of his recent works then he must really like it, and you. Since you were kids you had been friends, and not so long ago you made the first step in being more. You had been with him for most of your life, and you wanted to commit the rest of it to him too. Although you weren’t entirely sure he felt the same.

    Doyoung was a good boyfriend, great in fact. He was sweet and so adorable. Practically every day you’d join him on a walk along the beach. You’d both always smile so much when together. You could see a future with him. You wanted your future to be with him, but something like that wasn’t a decision you could make on your own. Many times after a walk together you’d get some drinks together, the barista even knew you both by now. You sat together, looking out at the waves, enjoying the cool breeze.

“Doyoung.”

“Hm?”

“Remember that job I applied for.”

“Your dream job one?”

“I got an offer from them.”

“Really? That’s amazing! Congratulations!”

“Thanks, I’m so happy but there’s just one thing…”

“That can’t be worth giving up your dreams for. You’ve always talked about your dreams and following them, this is your chance.”

“What about you?”

“Me? I don’t wanna hold you back or anything.”

“It’s just… the job would require me to move…”

“Oh.”

“So I’m not so sure about it.”

“Y/n.” Doyoung took your hand. “An opportunity like this is once in a lifetime. You shouldn’t pass it up because of me.”

“But what about us? I don’t wanna lose you.”

“You won’t. I’ll be right here.”

“So you’re not even gonna be a little bit selfish?”

“Huh?”

“You’re not gonna tell me to stay cause you don’t want me to go. You don’t want me to choose you in this situation?”

“What kind of boyfriend would want you to give up on your dreams?”

“You haven’t said anything about you in this. If I take the job I won’t be around anymore. I won’t be able to talk or visit much with how things go for new hires. We wouldn’t be able to do all the things we’ve talked about…”

“That’s okay, we can-”

“No it’s not! Don’t you want to be with me instead of encouraging me to leave?”

“I… I don’t understand…”

“I’ve always talked about the future, my future with you, but you never seem to want any of it.”

“Y/n-”

“I don’t know what it is you want, but it isn’t me.”

    You got up and walked away without another word. You didn’t want to break down in front of him, but you also didn’t know what else there was to say. Despite things being good you had been feeling that way for a while. Doyoung always seemed like he was happy where he was, and he didn’t strive for anything more. You could understand being content and comfortable where you were, but that wasn’t the case for you.

❤

    Doyoung wasn’t sure what went wrong that day, but he knew he would always regret it. For days you just ghosted him, and he was desperately trying to figure out what to do to make things better. He thought he had time, that is until he heard from friends that you were leaving. He rushed out to find you, just barely managing to catch you before you got into a taxi. He grabbed your hand, holding you tight, as tight as he could without hurting you.

“Don’t go, please.”

“What are you doing?”

“You can’t just leave, not like this. We haven’t talked and-”

“We did talk. You told me to pursue my dreams, and not to worry about you because you don’t matter in my life…”

“I didn’t say that.”

“You did. You were so happy for me and didn’t consider at all that you were important too. Maybe I didn’t need this dream, maybe the two of us could make a dream together, but you just can’t commit to anything, can you?”

“I can commit to you. We can build our life together just like you want.”

“Do you mean that? Or are you just saying it because that’s what I wanted to hear?”

“I do mean that, every word…”

“The thing is, I don’t think I believe you.”

“Y/n-”

“I have to go. You know one should dive in first when they truly want something, and I’ve taken the dive. Thanks for the encouragement.”

“Y/n-”

    You pulled your hand away and got into the taxi, leaving Doyoung alone by the side of the street. He watched you going, feeling the loss, but that was nothing compared to what was to come. Considering how things went down when you left, he didn’t expect a message from you, and he didn’t get one either. It took days to work up the courage to say something first, and a simple text wouldn’t do. So he called you, and then he heard your phone ringing. He turned around in excitement, you had come back, you were here with him, but that was far from the truth. When he looked back he found a friend holding up a box.

    Doyoung slowly lowered the phone and stepped closer, seeing some of your things in the box, most importantly your phone ringing. He didn’t need to be told what had happened. In the moment he felt his heart sink into the void and collapsed to the ground. He screamed out of grief and self-hatred. All he could do was think back to that day. Everything had been so perfect, and if had just said the right thing, if he had realized the truth, you would still be here. He felt responsible, like this was all his fault. If he hadn’t so blindly encouraged you to pursue your dreams, if had spoken from the heart, then maybe he could have gotten you to stay, and none of this would have happened.

    Being alone felt different now. It wasn’t just a phase, something that could go away eventually, it was permanent. Waiting for someone he knew would never come. The days turned into weeks, and the weeks turned into months. It all felt the same, time just kept flowing and he was unaware of its presence. At every corner he was haunted. He could see the beach just outside the window, sometimes swearing he saw you walking along the coast. Everywhere he went your impression lingered, just as he too was left behind. If he were to move on, leaving this place would be for the best, but he didn’t want to do that.

    Even if you weren’t there, he could still feel your presence. He didn’t want to lose that. At some point he began to live again, but more like a shell of his former self. Everything had changed, and yet it was all the same. Sometimes he could pretend. Get lost in work or in his own head, pretending you weren’t by his side but out there somewhere. Then he’d return to reality and remember the truth. Most of the time he seemed alright, functioning as a normal person, but then there were the days he couldn’t. The days he’d get your things and quietly look them over, choking on his own tears and remembering his promise of commitment that came too late. What he wouldn’t give to go back.

@starillusion13​

[ladylooch]

Soft Thoughts Sunday - Kevin & Sam

Third!! Kevin/Sam- Their first time at the beach after the trade! Just cutesy lovey dovey day in the sand ☀️🌊👙⛱️

A/N: I am challenging myself to keep this soft and not turn it smutty…. We will see. Edit- after three lines of writing: I didn’t stand a chance.

My book is good. Amazing really. I have been transported to war torn France almost 78 years ago. Until Kevin Fiala started walking out of the Pacific Ocean in 2022.

The second he turned back to the beach to rejoin me on the towel, no book was going to be able to hold my attention.

Large rivers of water flatten the hair on his legs and arms as he walks towards me. He flips his hair back, shaking out salty droplets with his hand as he squints against the California sun. I’m blatantly staring. He catches me, throwing a wink before he looks up and down the beach for traffic to cross. I let my eyes linger on his left hand, thrilled to see the black definition of his silicone wedding band. When his eyes meet mine again, he grins wide, snickering at his final approach.

“I need to send Andreas a gift.” I murmur. “He thickened you up this off-season.” Kevin is as muscular as he has ever been in preparation for his new team. I haven't been able to take my eyes off of him since mid- July.

“He loves those fruit arrangements.” Kevin says as he comes next to me. His large palm slaps my ass, then grips it tight. My butt gets wet from his hand. “I’m hungry. What do you want for lunch?” 

“What is around here?” I ask. He sits next to me on his towel, looking back towards the boardwalk. He puts his sunglasses back on to see better. 

“Ah… I can see pizza, tacos, and sandwiches from here.” 

“Pizza?”

“Pineapple it is.” He reaches for his phone, rolling to his stomach next to me. I don’t react and he nudges my shoulder for a response.

“You know better.”

Kevin and I settle on pepperoni and chicken alfredo pizzas to share. He submits the order, planning on walking up there in a half hour to grab it. Then he works his way under my arm, snuggling into my side. I move my book to avoid his wet head making an imprint in it. 

“Love me?” He murmurs, giraffing up to kiss my lips. I till my sunglasses down.

“You’re needy today.” 

“Yeah. I’m nervous about tomorrow.”

Tomorrow is the first time he will interact with the media, his teammates, and other Kings staff members. He is feeling anxious about all the unknown. Where to park.. where to grab his gear from… interviews with new media members he doesn’t know. It all feels overwhelming. Somehow, he blacked out on how hard that was when he was first traded to Minnesota.

“They’re so excited you’re here.” I remind him. There has been a buzz around our arrival with flowers and groceries and a whole list of restaurant recommendations to get us acclimated. The Kings have been wonderful to us. We couldn't have asked for a warmer welcome to California.

“What if I don’t live up to the hype?” I snort, then roll my eyes. I let my book fall shut, stroking a wet chunk of hair off his forehead. 

“You’re ready for this. I’ve never seen you so engaged and focused before. There is no way this isn’t going to work out for you... or us." Kevin’s fingers trail along my side, tickling me slightly. I jolt. He chuckles then quietly apologizes.

“I’m gonna take a nap. Wake me in like fifteen?” 

“Okay.” I lean down to kiss his face, then crack my book open again. Kevin tosses his shirt over his face to block out the sunlight. His hand rests on my lower back, slightly below the waistband of my biking while he snoozes. I feel his phone buzz against my arm, seeing the text that our pizza is ready. I take the shirt off his face, then lean forward to kiss his nose. “Food is ready.” He groans. 

“You go.”

“Okay.” I shrug, reaching for my cover up.

“I’m kidding. You’re too pretty to work.” 

“I have skills.” I mutter.

“Mmmm, yeah. You’ll be using them later.” 

“Stop.”

“No!” He jokes then begins his walk towards our pizza. 

Our time at the beach extends a few more hours beyond lunch. I finish my book. Kevin ushers me into the water and we watch the sunset buried deeply into each other’s arms. The last flickers of orange are disappearing over the ocean when we begin to pack up.

We get back to the extended stay hotel we are living in while looking for a permanent place in Manhattan Beach. My mood instantly sours as the hotel door clicks shut behind us. The beachy distraction from our reality wasn’t enough. I can’t help it. I miss our bright, spacious apartment in the Minneapolis skyline. Kevin senses my shift.

“It’s temporary.” He murmurs, kissing my sunburnt shoulder. “Oo, we should get some lotion on you.” I put my bag down on the bed as Kevin strolls to the bathroom. “Gonna let my hands wander too.” Our eyes meet and we share a laugh. 

Yeah this is all really new, but at least we have each other.

[chaoticgremlinwholikescheese]

A Snowy Trip

Eddie and Chris have lived in LA for several years. In this time, they've explored much of what California has to offer. They've gone to Disneyland, the beaches, San Francisco, and more. Yet in all these years they've never gone to the mountains. This was never a big deal. At least, until Buck found out. He was absolutely flabbergasted.

"You guys have never been to the mountains? You're telling me that in all these years, you've never been to Lake Tahoe?"

"I don't know. We've just never thought about it."

"Have you ever seen snow?"

"I lived in Texas, Buck. Not the Sahara desert."

"I have to take you guys to Tahoe. We'll make a vacation of it!"

Eddie wants to say no. But Chris has always wanted to go to the mountains, and he could really use a good vacation...

"I have a couple of days of vacation saved up."

"Perfect! I'll start planning!"

And plan Buck did. He read all sorts of articles, combed through countless reviews, researched the best places to go. While he did that, Eddie invested in the proper snow gear. He may have overdone it a bit, but he doesn't want him or his kid to have frostbite. They both settled on a date, and prepped everything else. When they told Chris, he was ecstatic. He was bouncing with excitement for days.

The drive was long. Eddie and Buck took turns driving. Buck drove the most, since he actually enjoys it. Plus Eddie always gets sleepy in cars. Something about the rocking lulls him to sleep. They passed the time by playing games, listening to music, and talking. Buck put on some Disney songs. They all sang along, much to the chagrin of cars around them. They were very loud and very off key.

They stopped for In-N-Out on the way. Chris got a strawberry milkshake like usual. They munched away as they discussed who the strongest Marvel hero is.

"It has to be Captain Marvel. I mean, she's basically a human nova," Buck argues.

"I'm partial towards Captain America. He's human, but that serum made him pretty much invincible. Plus he's got more determination than any of the others."

"His shield is the size of a dinner plate, Eddie."

"Actually," Chris pipes in, "The most powerful superhero is Squirrel Girl. She's defeated pretty much every major villain. She's stronger than Thanos. She also speaks to squirrels, which is pretty cool."

"There's a squirrel girl? And I've never heard of her? I love squirrels!" Buck mutters. It's true, Buck is a big fan of squirrels. Whenever he sees a squirrel, he excitedly announces it to everyone around him. The enthusiasm over seeing a fairly common animal never wavers. Eddie thinks it's adorable, but he'll never admit that.

When they finally reached the mountains, Chris was practically exploding with excitement. He was staring at all the snow in wonder. It occured to Eddie that Chris probably doesn't remember snow so well, since they left Texas when he was young. Chris starts listing off things they have to do. Sledding, snow ball fights, building a snowman, and more. Buck vows that they'll do every single one.

They pull into a small driveway in front of a cabin. It's rustic, like something out of a book. Eddie gingerly steps out of the car. He expects there to be ice, but the driveway is salted.

"I made sure they salted it before we came. I didn't want to risk Chris slipping," Buck supplies.

It's a small gesture, yet it means so much. Buck always looks out for Chris. Eddie wants to kiss him silly, but he restrains himself. He won't risk potentially ruining the vacation before it's even started. He won't risk losing Buck. He pushes all that away to focus on unloading the truck.

The inside of the cabin is beautiful. There's a small kitchen off to the side. There's a large wooden bookshelf up against the far wall, filled with books and games. A soft couch sits in front of a stone fireplace. There's framed paintings and photos hung on the walls. It has a family feel to it. It's perfect.

"Buck, this is amazing."

"Only the best for the Diazes," He chuckles.

Chris has his own little room. There's a twin bed covered in piles of blankets. Chris immediately starts unpacking his stuff so that he can go play in the snow. Buck and Eddie head to their room. Buck stops in the doorway. Eddie peeks over his shoulder. There's only one bed.

"I'm so sorry, the website said there were two beds in here. I can take the couch," Buck rambles.

"It's fine. We can share. Nothing we haven't done before."

It's true. During COVID they shared Buck's bed in his loft. And the nights where the nightmares get to bad, they end up in the same bed. Or when one is injured and the other needs to keep an eye on them. It's a comfort for both of them.

"Are you sure? I don't want to make you uncomfortable."

"It's okay. Really. C'mon, let's unpack. Chris is dying to go outside."

READ THE REST ON AO3

[myverysecretblog]

Hi Sylvia,

<Things are getting serious>

•••

My soul aches for life. I watched the secret life of Walter Mitty, and fire sparked in me. Life of Pi is one of my favorite movies. Sleep on the floor by the Lumineers is etched into my mind since I was a kid. Although I guess that doesn’t mean much, since I remember almost every song I ever hear.

I was born into a family, who bolts the doors, turns on the alarm and checks the cameras before going to sleep at 10. While I wanted to camp on the roof on a random Thursday. They took me places and allowed me to live the way I wanted to. But they never lived in them with me. Once they figured out this wasn’t a phase, our silent agreement was, I would go out into the world the way I wanted to and they would look away when it scared them. It’s more than I can ask of them and I’m grateful every day for the way they accept me.

But along those lines, I had made up my mind I wanted a partner who could show me the world I never was shown. So I chased that. For good chunk of my 27 years I looked for it. It made me meet some amazing people, take me to some incredible places, with mostly wonderful experiences.

Somewhere in those 27 years, I realized I showed myself the world. And no man in the world will ever be able to show me something I haven’t ever seen before. I feel it now. In the parties I go to, in the beaches I swim, in the drugs I take. I’ve seen it done it before. They’re all the same, a fun high I can ebb and flow in. All experiences more or less cut from the same cloth. But it doesn’t take away from the fact that these are still what ignites a fire in me. Old habits die hard. They no longer have the chokehold it used to have on me, but it’s how I’ve chosen to continue my life.

I’m not asking this of you however. To introduce me to interesting people; or to take me to places I’ve never been. I’m asking you to come into my world that I’ve discovered with me. To see it in its entirety. The best, most enlightening parts and the darkest parts. To decide for yourself if this is a world you want to live in too. Because whether you like it or not, the world I’ve built is who I am as I’m sure your’s is for you.

I will forever be tethered to this world. But if you don’t like it, you have the very real option of stepping out.

That said; I do believe you have a place in this world with me, as I do in yours. For years I’ve indulged in my immaturity, looking for a partner that only expands who I am as a person. It took me to come to a point of realizing that I have become and are becoming all that I am by myself. You, in your own gentle way have never offered that for me. Instead from the start you’ve given me internal space, stability, accountability and discipline by being yourself. In the kindest way i know how, what I’m trying to say is, you are offering me nothing to do with what I want. But instead a love that can experience two different universes together without building, fixing, or changing the other.

If ultimately you do decide, this is not the life you’ve envisioned for yourself, we can with closure end this. But if we do figure out how to push and pull together in our own worlds; just like two universes colliding to create something new. I believe we can scrap all of what we’ve been building up to this point, and from its foundation let a completely new world form just for the two of us to live in.