#i’m still in shock that i got to see it. ON BROADWAY. less than TWO WEEKS before it closed
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sneepsnoopboopideeboop · 2 years ago
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phantom’s officially closed…
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dulcewrites · 2 years ago
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Super obsessed with broadway myrah..
More Than I Can Bare
There is no peace leading up to the worshop. Aemond had woken up each day with a different aching muscle. First his head pounding, then his back throbbing, or a random bruise on his knee.
But he would lying if he said he would trade it for anything. As cliche as it sounds, he gets to wake up and do something he cares about. A little bit of pain inflicted by stress is welcomed. Expected even.
Nothing could bring his mood down… well almost nothing.
Rhaenyra had blown through draped in typical New Yorker black, and Celine sunglasses covering her eyes. Faux smiles and pretend well wishes settled on her face and from her lips; Aemond knew his sister well enough to know this was not a courtesy drop in, it was to rattle Viserys. Or to annoy Aemond. Both had been accomplished thoroughly.
The rest of the cast and members of staff gushed over her appearance, but it was Myrah who had to the largest reaction. Wide eyes catching on Rhaenyra in awe. Eyes following the starlet like a lost puppy. There was something sweetly earnest about the whole thing to Aemond. She comes in the following day dawned in black performance wear. It was endearing to see her be so painfully young and green. Myrah has the same childlike ability everyone does to want to copy someone she admires.
Rhaenyra had taken notes, notes, as if she was still a part of the creative process. Aemond had broken two pencils in the process, and one pen leading to him have to change shirts once the ink spilled.
Myrah accepted them with smile and grace. She does everything with a smile and grace.
“Your sister is so cool,” she beamed over lunch. “She told me she really likes the show so far.”
Aemond just hums, not having it in him to bring Myrah down from the euphoric state. Her foot brushed against his under the table, and he wonders if she meant to do it on purpose.
“Myrah, darling,” Viserys sticks his head out of the theater door. “Lisa in costumes needs you.”
Darling. Viserys called everyone some sort of term of endearment, but something about him calling Myrah that made Aemond want to throw up his salad. Myrah sighs under her breath.
“She has been nipping and tucking this dress for days, any less fabric and I’m putting on a burlesque show,” she stands from the craft area set up in the small lobby of the theatre. She turns to Aemond with fake stern look. “Those pages better be done by the end of the day.”
“Yes ma’am,” he saluted. He can’t help but watch her walk away. A bit enraptured by the the coils falling out of her make-do bun and the spring in her step.
“Crushing on the future star is a bit cliche, no?”
Aemond’s shoulders tense instantly at the sound of his sister’s voice. Rhaenyra walks from behind him and goes to sit where Myrah did.
“The writer and the singer,” she laughs. “Yeah, men are so simple.”
“Why are you even here,” he bypasses her observation. “You left for a reason.”
Rhaenyra rolls her eyes. “So because I don’t want to tap dance across a stage anymore, I can’t come visit my family?”
“You didn’t want to, or the clock was ticking and you got out before it could blow?”
Rhaenyra’s light eyes darken at the accusation. Despite still being the prime of life, her ‘aging’ was always a sore spot, especially between her and their father. He knew that though Viserys never said it outloud, it always implied that Rhaenyra would not be daddy’s little star forever. Aemond doesn’t know if that fact hurt Viserys or Rhaenyra more. Her early theatre retirement came at a shock to everyone, including the family.
“Look,” the playful tone has been dropped. “I’d warn your friend to be careful. I’ve seen this movie before. One day, he will be telling you she’s just some actress, the next you’ll be a guest at their wedding.”
Aemond’s lip curls into a bit of a sneer at the recollection of what Viserys did to his mother. Alicent tells him she doesn’t regret the chance to live out a pipe dream and that in the end it brought her children, but Aemond sees the way her eyes sadden at the mention of her late 20s. What could have been.
But that was some time ago, things are different, including how the industry works.
“It’s not like that,” Aemond frowns.
“Not like that… now,” Rhaenyra shrugs. “I know you don’t like to hear this but your last name means something. For all the positives and opportunities, it also means you’ve been coddled to hell,” Rhaenyra holds up her hand to stop Aemond when he tries to interrupt. “That no fault of your own. But you don’t have to advocate yourself when you walk in a room. The name ‘Targargyen’ does it for you. Maybe you can take a break from the pretending you don’t take advantage of that, and use it to protect her. Knowing how our father burns people out, she’ll need it.”
Rhaenyra doesn’t give Aemond a chance to respond, just pushes her expensive glasses back down on her face and gets up to leave.
A sinking feeling settles in Aemond’s stomach. The kind he used to get that made him cling to his mother out of fear. Not of anything in particular; it was always the possibility of the unknown that scared Aemond the most.
AEMOND’S VERSION OF TAMGO DE ROXANNE BC HES JEALOUS OF MYRAH AND VISERYS SPENDING TIME TOGETHER 💔💔💔💔💔
Aemond to viserys (also el tango de Roxanne, sparking diamonds, and come what may, one day I’ll fly away best songs on the soundtrack. Mashup and inserting modern music >>)
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fangirlovestuff · 4 years ago
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‘stache Stories - Chris Evans x reader
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a/n - hey lovely people!! at last, a fic! behold this astounding feat of- well, i don’t really know, but i’m happy i finally wrote at least one of the requests i had😂 i promise i’m trying to write more but for a few different reasons i’m veryyyy late on stories and i hope the anon is still around to see this! also, i personally have a hate hate relationship with the mustache, so it’s kinda in there too hehe, but we all always love chris. enjoy!<3
for the first time in months, you were finally going to see your boyfriend
not only were you going to finally see him in person after a month of both of your jobs keeping you apart, but you were going to watch him perform on broadway! 
you were so excited to watch him act on stage, you loved all of his movies and you were sure you were going to love the play just the same, if not even more
you texted chris you were there before locating the back door, telling your name to the security guard at the entrance
you asked him where you could find chris and he just pointed in a certain direction vaguely, so you looked around as you went in the direction he pointed in
you were trying to keep an eye out for chris, but you've never really been backstage in broadway before, so you couldn't help marveling at the hustle and bustle of people, and it was still nearly two hours until the show
you saw someone standing on their phone, and you assumed they'd be available enough to help you, since unlike all the other people who were walking around fervently, the man seemed pretty relaxed
"excuse me, do you know where i can f-"
he turned his face in your direction, and it took you a second before a gasp fell from your lips, and then you started giggling like a lunatic
"you made it!" chris grinned, enveloping you in a tight hug
you sighed contently in his arms, holding him back just as tightly, but when you broke away, you struggled to contain your laughter
"babe... you can't just-" you started laughing again, the mustache just as funny as it was shocking, "you can't just ignore That," you gestured at his face
"you don't like it?" he asked, but the shy smile on his face indicated he was aware of the... less than great mustache on his face
"i don't wike it," you confirmed teasingly and shook your head before pressing a kiss to his cheek
"well, the sacrifices we have to make for the craft," he said dramatically
"ah yes," you said, just as dramatic, "the craft. but, i gotta ask, how necessary was it? like is it super necessary or can you like... i don't know, shave it off tonight before we go out?"
"i didn't know it was that bad," he chuckled
"okay, okay, it's not that bad," you shrugged, "but, y'know, i feel like it kinda obscures the view," you pouted
"the view? what view?" he asks, a smug smile stretching across his face
"my very handsome boyfriend who has been tragically kidnapped by a wierdo," you said, your pout now entirely exaggerated
"i don't know is that was a compliment or an insult," he admitted with a chuckle
"best of both worlds," you smirked, prompting him to laugh
"so we're still on for tonight after the show, right?" he asked once his laughter died down
"obviously yes," you said, sincerity showing on your face, "i missed you," you kissed him softly, knowing you still had a ton of other people around, even if they were polite enough to pretend you two weren't there, it was probably a matter of time until someone came by looking for him
"great," he smiled softly at you once you parted
"see ya later luigi!" you winked at him 
"that's... fair," he laughed, shaking his head
you went by to look around the area before you'd come back to see the show itself
after the show, you found chris backstage once more, after he already changed back into his normal clothes, and took his hand, ready to head out
you two were quick, slipping out before there were that many people by the door, and you made your way past whatever crowd was starting to form before you could start walking a little less briskly
"you were wonderful," you bumped his shoulder with yours, smiling
"yeah? you liked it?"
"i mean, i kinda hated you, but that's in the job description, i think," you giggled
"yes!" he pumped his fist in celebration
"wow, if i would've known that's how you'd react to me hating you maybe i'd do it more often," you teased
"i'd rather not," he laughed, before pulling you into a street corner, where you were barely seen from the traffic, and wrapped his arms around your waist
"i missed you," he whispered
your lips finally met properly, tongues exploring, eager to get reacquainted with a beloved landscape
"missed you too," you answered, your voice a bit breathy
you swallowed and then took his hand in yours, "c'mon, let's go to dinner," you smiled, dragging him back into the street
you loved the man, really didn't like the mustache, but it made him a little less recognizable, which you were both thankful for
sometime later, scott grew a similar mustache 
when you first saw him as he opened the door for you and chris when you visited him, all he got was an "oh. so what's up?"
chris looked at you incredulously
"seriously? when i grow a mustache you call me a weirdo and when he does all he gets is an 'oh'?" 
"oh my god, i almost forgot about your mustache," you said, bursting into laughter, "god, that was terrible, wasn't it scott?"
scott laughed and agreed with you, ushering you and a grumbling chris inside
"honestly scott, if i wasn't his girlfriend back then and i saw him on the street, i would run," you said, "and i hate that i need to clarify this, but not into his arms - i would run away," you teased, watching a red tint spread on chris' cheeks from the corner of your eye
"you got a point there," the two of you laughed
"but he has a mustache as well! right now!" chris half-whined the words
"yeah, you do," you snickered at the man in question. "well, you could probably do that crime movie you've always wanted, cop or criminal," you laughed
"where was this energy when i had a mustache?" chris chimed in again
"well, maybe it's because i don't have to date scott," you retaliated
"you never had to date me too," he pointed out
"no, i really think i did. see, charming, wonderful, smart guys aren't that easy to come by, so really i had no other choice," you shrugged
"at this point you'd think i'd be able to understand if you're insulting me or complimenting me," chris huffed out a laugh
"does it matter?"
"nope, i love you anyway," he wrapped his arm around you
"awww. love you too," you leaned into his side, "but please don't grow a mustache ever again. i'll do whatever you want"
"ooo, whatever i w-"
"may i remind you there are children in the room!" you cut him off, gesturing at scott, and the three of you laughed together, "so whatever you were gonna say, spare us"
"fine," he rolled his eyes, "but i still think i looked better than him with a mustache"
"mmmm, debatable."
i couldn’t help referencing the mustache scott has now at the end, especially after the intereview with both of them yesterday (i love them so much omg), and as always i love hearing your thoughts!!<3
Taglist:  @horny-nd-bored​ @shannon124 @perfectlyharolds​ @wintersoldierslut​ @iceebabies​  @sleepingpapermouse @steverogerswasalwaysworthy @holtzkinnon @angelicl-y @stydia-4-ever @thatoneperson5000 @fangirlfree​ @kaitcordx25 @bequeening​ @steve-barry-damon-logan​ @itscrazycherryblossomcollection​ @hollandxmarvel​ @stargazingfangirl18 @readsreblogsfics @onetwo3000 @beritmetal @harrystylesholland @jazbot2000 @anobscurename @xxxtwilightaxelxxx @peggycarter-steverogers @evansphnx12 @starlightcrystalline @procrastinatingsapphictrash
if you wanna join / be removed from a taglist, comment/message me! much love <3
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wherethingscomebackx · 4 years ago
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Top 25 Larry Fics of 2020
h 2020 was HELLISH. So thank you to all the writers, and I mean ALL of them, who kept us occupied as the world continues to burn.
You may be familiar with these lists:
Top 25 Larry fics of 2016
Top 25 Larry fics of 2017
Top 25 Larry fics of 2018
Top 25 Larry fics of 2019
We’re going on our 5th year!!  As always, I read a lot of fic and the majority of it is Larry. I like making lists and I like Larry so I thought I’d do some minimal research of the top 25 larry fics published/completed in 2020 in order of least to most kudos (with links). All of these fics are top notch so you should all check them out!
25.) a trail of honey through it all by @yvesaintlourent (27k)
The boy in front of him, well really, the man in front of him, was like something out of a confusing wet dream. Built, tall, tan and muscular, his skin glistened with sweat after a long day of working outdoors with his hands. He was wearing a cut up old American football shirt, the bottom hem was torn and the sleeves were cut off to the point where the t-shirt was really just a loose tank top. The shorts he had on had clearly been full length jeans at one point, and were now just crudely cut off above the knee. His white socks were pulled up too high on his calves, and the brown work boots he had on were old as fuck, the leather peeling along the edges of the soles. Curly brown hair stuck out from the edges of his backwards snapback, and there was a smudge of grease wiped along his brow bone. The smattering of hair along his jaw proved that he hadn’t shaved in a week or two, the hair growing in thicker across his upper lip and around his chin. His sinfully bowed mouth was pink and plump, and Louis was suddenly hyper-focused on the way that he chewed at the toothpick stuck between his lips. He looked like he needed a shower. Louis wanted to lick him.
Or, the TPH fic we’ve all been waiting for.
24.) even the best laid plans by @falsegoodnight (25k)
“Anyways,” Louis stresses, narrowing his eyes, “just let me say it and then rate how terrible of an idea it is on a scale from one to ten.”
“Alright,” Zayn agrees, sitting up expectantly.
“I want to ask Harry Styles to take my virginity,” Louis blurts, holding his hands out for emphasis.
The way Zayn’s eyes bulge is almost comical. “Negative infinity,” he says, voice choked. “Negative infinity times negative infinity.”
“Technically, a negative times a negative is -”
“Really negative infinity,” Zayn corrects himself, shaking his head wildly. “Louis, what the fuck?”
-
Or, Louis wants to have sex with someone and decides Harry is the perfect alpha for the job.
23.) A Distant Hazy Light by @greenfeelings (76k)
Life’s pretty ordinary for Harry. He lives with his best friend, got into university just like he’s planned, and manages to support himself just fine for an unbonded omega. If he sustains that lifestyle by getting paid to help alphas through their rut every now and then, that’s nothing to be hung up on. Until he’s hired by an alpha that turns everything upside down.
Or, Harry’s working on taking Louis’ walls down, until he builds his own up.
22.) Ghost Note Symphony by whoknows (96k)
Louis is on tour when he first hears about it. It’s all over the news – Harry Styles Attacked By Fan runs in headlines for days. It’s not even just the gossip rags, either. Actual journalists are covering the story. It would have been impossible to avoid hearing about it. Technically, Oli is the one who tells Louis about it, but it’s not exactly being covered up. Harry doesn’t answer Louis’ text asking if he’s alright, but that’s not really surprising. They haven’t spoken for months, and it’s been a lot longer than that since they’ve had a real conversation. The sting of the text going unanswered is still there, less painful than it might have been a few years ago.
It’s not that it’s easy to forget about, exactly. Louis has a whole life outside of One Direction now, though. So Louis goes on with his life, figuring that if Harry was seriously hurt he would have heard about it by now. He might currently be in the same country as Harry, but being on opposite sides of it puts enough distance between them that putting it in the back of his mind is easy. There’s nothing Louis could do, even if he thought Harry might want him to.
That’s why everything that happens next comes as a complete shock to him.
21.) Until by @allwaswell16 (38k)
Rural Eagle County, Colorado wasn’t the type of place to find a famous musician or actor. At least not until songwriter Louis Tomlinson showed up with pop star Niall Horan to visit his uncle’s horse ranch, and they just happened to find themselves next door to a reclusive former movie star.
20.) Strangers in Love by sweetums (42k)
Louis wakes up to find himself in a marriage with the last man he thought he'd ever end up with.
-
Prompt 51: An amnesia fic where louis and harry were enemies to lovers but after an accident, louis only remembers those memories that him and harry hated each other. now harry has to fix it. I think something like this less dark and less angsty compared to other amnesia fics and it could be funny
19.) A Long Way From The Playground by Pink_Sunsets (170k)
One Direction is broken up. They broke up five years ago. That should be the end of the story, right?
Harry is finished with One Direction. He now has a new life, one with two kids and a successful solo career. And he’s happy.
But a call one night from management flips Harry’s whole new life upside down, and he’s forced to face the life he had left behind.
As well as a certain blue eyed man who had left him behind.
18.) my love’s not simple (it’s fragile) by @falsegoodnight (27k)
“Can I take you out tomorrow?” he asks. “My shift ends at 7 but we can go for dinner at 8.”
Louis is silent for a few seconds and then, “Like… on a date?”
Harry swallows thickly. He hasn’t done this in years, hasn’t ever wanted to. “Yeah.”
He’s worried he’s misread things but then Louis raises his head to kiss Harry’s cheek. “Yeah,” he says easily. “Sure.”
Tension leaves his body swiftly. “Are you sure?” asks Harry. “I know we’re both so busy but I can’t not try with you, Lou.”
“Neither can I,” says Louis. “I think we can figure it out. I care about you a lot Harry. We’ve known each other for a week, but I already like you so much.”
-
Or Harry's new job is threatened by his impending rut. Desperate for a solution, he allows Niall to introduce him to Louis, an omega whose heat begins the same day. They click.
17.) Cocaine for Breakfast by @harryeatsburger (309k)
“It’s an easy job.” He continues, as if Louis wants to listen. “Like I said, a few trips. Parties, students, nothing dramatic.”
Louis gazes over to Harry. He’s looking thoughtful now, eyes on the green like he’s talking more to himself than Louis.
“Clubbing, drinks. Whatever, the business is just a side thing.”
That’s not how Louis remembers it to be, “You lying?” He honestly can’t tell.
Harry shakes his head slowly, meeting Louis' eyes.
“No,” He answers almost toneless. Harry clears his throat, “I won’t put you in any dangerous situation.” His voice is sincere, Louis can tell he means it, his jade green eyes glinting with truth.
or, - Louis Tomlinson is a drug addict, sent away from his beloved party-scene to recover. There, he discovers that small towns have just as much access to drugs as London did, plus something even better that he just can't get enough of. That something is a boy with green eyes and bouncy curls named Harry Styles. -
16.) Tastes like Strawberries by @sadaveniren (4k)
I’m stressed. I’m nesting and demand cuddles. Come over
Harry frowned and double checked who the text was from. Yup, it still said Louis - Grad, which meant it was from Louis from his grad school.
aka Louis texts Harry by mistake. It works out
15.) the way the storm blows by @rbbsbb (21k)
Louis doesn’t have a habit of thinking about Harry’s dick.
That would be weird, seeing as they’re best mates, and they share a flat, and they’ve spent holidays at each other’s family homes. Their friendship hasn’t ever risen to a point where Louis should want to see his mate’s dick, and he’s happy to keep it that way.
Except, all that Louis can think about is exactly that. The size of it. The shape. The amount of people it’s been in.
Maybe it’s the tequila talking, or the fact that Louis’ just recently walked in to an eyeful of Harry taking turns on some slags that he’s never seen before, but. Louis’ mind can’t stop obsessing over the idea.
14.) bruise you like a peach by @falsegoodnight (40k)
There’s two reasons Harry despises Econ.
The first is that it’s boring as fuck. The second reason is a bit more personal, a bit more focused in a way. As in it’s focused on one specific thing, or in his case, person.
His name is Louis Tomlinson.
13.) Watching The World Fall by whoknows (11k)
This segment has been going on long enough that Louis knows what’s coming before James starts in on it, trying to sell him on something he knows that Louis wouldn’t normally be buying. But there’s four cameras surrounding him, and an audience watching him expectantly, so if Louis wants to continue convincing people that he’s doing just fine, he’s going to have to go along with it.
“We have a whole host of single men backstage waiting to meet you, Louis,” James tells him. “We want to help you find love tonight, on Late Late Live Tinder. Is this okay? Do you want to play?”
It actually kind of makes sense that his first date after the break-up is going to be just as public as said break-up. Something like coming full circle.
“Alright, James,” Louis agrees, hopping down off his stool.
“Okay, come down to the stage,” James says. Louis can’t even tell whether the excitement in his voice is genuine or not. “Right now, come on down!”
12.) Quiet People Have the Loudest Minds by @2tiedships2 (38k)
Broadway shows were one of the few things that could keep Louis’ attention for a full two hours without needing to move about. But not tonight.
The alpha next to him was both infuriating him and practically turning him on at the same time. He needed to leave. The alpha, that is. Louis was staying.
Or the one where Louis is a nonverbal omega who has accepted the fact that he will never find an alpha that will treat him as an equal. On the other hand, he’s never met anyone like Harry.
11.) The Wrath of the Emerald Eyes by @purpledandeli0n (85k)
His chin is grabbed harshly, facing the two deep green eyes that have been getting on his nerves for the past ten minutes. The smirk on the man's face does not vanish. The grip of his hand on Louis' chin does not soften, his thumb at the side of his lower lip.
His smile widens as he answers Louis' question, ''My name is Styles, but you will call me Captain."
Pirate AU
10.) Canyon Moon by @eeveelou (40k)
For as long as Louis has remembered, he has been promised to be mated to Harry, his best friend and the future pack alpha. But Louis’s heart belonged to the forest and to the hunt more than he could ever imagine it belonging to Harry.
Then Harry’s father dies in a violent accident, and Louis’s future alpha disappears on the wind.
An A/B/O Lion King AU
9.) We Both Got Nothing to Hide by lovelarry10 (43k)
“Talk to me, Lou.”
“I can’t,” Louis mumbled, knowing he genuinely couldn’t say it. He couldn’t admit to what he was doing. “Don’t ask me to say it, because I can’t.”
“Then… I’ll try and guess. You’ve… got some stuff of Harry’s. Something of his to make it smell like him?”
Louis just nodded, eyes fixated on the floor. This was humiliating, but he knew Zayn wouldn’t stop until he found out what was going on.
“Okay. Like… a blanket, or a comforter or something?”
“Kind of…”
//
Omega Louis has a secret nest. Alpha Harry keeps losing his clothes.
8.) sleeping on our problems by @falsegoodnight (67k)
I’m in love with you, Louis thinks. He feels empty, weighed down by his sadness and the loss of Harry inside him just moments ago before his knot finally went down.
There’s moments where he’s sure Harry feels the same. Like now, when he’s gazing down at Louis with so much adoration and tenderness. It’s like they’re both on the cusp of something more, but neither of them ever say a word.
His confession is on the tip of his tongue ready to slide out like honey, and yet he remains silent. They both do, looking at each other and recognizing the reluctance mirrored in each other’s eyes. It’s then that Louis realizes they’re both scared.
-
Or Louis sleeps with Harry and they have more than just catching feelings to worry about.
7.) like it’s a game by @soldouthaz (32k)
there is little harry hates more than truth or dare.
and louis.
6.) before we knew by @falsegoodnight (39k)
“C’mon Lou,” says Zayn after a moment, He sounds even more exasperated than before. Louis sort of has a knack for exasperating people, especially people like Zayn who aren’t usually bothered by his brattiness. “Can’t you give this guy a chance? Harry Styles? Aren’t you curious about him at all?”
Despite his best efforts, Louis still flinches at the name. He really shouldn’t be so affected after all these years. He’s seen the name printed down the curve of his waist in obnoxiously and uncommonly large loopy letters every single day since his sixteenth birthday eight years ago. He’s very familiar with the name Harry Styles.
It sounds pretentious and Louis hates it.
He hates everything about his supposed soulmate.
He hates his large handwriting that stands out like a claim on his skin whenever he’s walking around shirtless. He hates his pretentious name. And now he hates his supposed curls and green eyes and dimples.
-
Or Louis has been skeptical of soulmates for years so it seems like fate when he finally bumps into the owner of the obnoxiously large signature printed into his skin since age sixteen: Harry Styles, a human rights attorney who is firmly against soulmates.
5.) Mine Would Be You by @crinkle-eyed-boo (114k)
Louis blinks his eyes open, his eyelids fluttering as the room swims around him. He takes several gulps of beer once he confirms that he’s definitely not hallucinating, that the very first portrait Harry Styles ever painted of him is hanging on that wall.
Louis stares at the wall, his heart jackrabbiting in his chest as he realizes that there’s not just one painting of him, there’s five, the portraits lined up like they’re some sort of storyboard depicting the rise and fall of his deepest love. His greatest heartache. A pain that cut him so deep that he left the fucking country, severing all ties with his life in New York, now suddenly surrounding him as if he’d never left.
Fucking shit motherfucker fuck.
Louis returns to New York City five years after he left it – and the love of his life – behind. He didn't intend to see Harry again, but fate has a funny way of pulling them together, whether they like it or not. After making a begrudging truce, they both start to wonder: Would it be so bad if history repeated itself?
4.) You’ve Got My Devotion (Hate You Sometimes) by @harryrainbows (95k)
Harry was in the biggest boy band in the world. He was also one half of the best (or worst, depends on who you ask) kept secret relationship in the music industry.
Now, almost five years on, after One Direction has broken up, and Harry and Louis' relationship has as well, a video threatens to put everything at risk.
One determined Irishman, a massive publicity stunt and two begrudging exes are all it takes to bring One Direction back to life and maybe, just maybe, Harry and Louis' mangled love life too.
Or: Harry and Louis are forced to fake-date after an old video from when they were dating emerges.
3.) The Space Between by @lads-laddylads (39k)
Harry Styles is the alpha rockstar who can’t sleep and doesn’t know why.
Louis Tomlinson is the omega PhD student who helps him figure it out.
2.) Nothing But You On My Mind by @absoloutenonsense (83k)
Louis Tomlinson is a PR manager hired to improve the image of royal bad-boy Prince Harry Styles. Unfortunately for him, that means being faced with the Prince's constant innuendos, incessant dirty jokes, and relentless flirting. Louis just wants to make it to Princess Gemma's coronation; once she's crowned Queen, his contract is up and he never has to see the Prince again.
1.) Collision by @tequiladimples (224k)
Mythology/Fairytale!AU in which Louis is a dainty fairy with a temper who wants to be intimidating and Harry hurts people. Naturally, they hate each other.
(Featuring Liam, the big and not-so-bad wolf who’s got a thing for humans, Zayn, a human with supernaturally good looks, and Niall, the cupid who just wants his job to be easier.)
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tpwkay · 4 years ago
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Medicine (h.s.)
You’re finally given permission to cover the song you’ve wanted to perform for years and a special surprise during your performance sweeps you off of your feet.
Word count: 11.5k
Rating/warnings: NSFW - A lot of this is plot but there is smut as well. Contains explicit language and consensual sex acts between a man and woman. This is a story written in the 2nd person (“self insert"). This isn’t written to be exclusionary, it’s just my preferred style! Author’s note can be found at the end!
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"Ladies and gentlemen, I cannot thank you enough for coming out tonight to listen to me and the band. We've got a couple more songs coming up for you but I just wanted to take a minute to tell y'all how much we appreciate you." You gesture to yourself and the band behind you as the lights on stage come up a bit. "We wouldn't be where we are without your support. From the bottom of our hearts, thank you!"
The crowd cheers and you can't help but experience an insurmountable feeling of joy. It never gets old. You'd been in the spotlight for a few years now, already at the end of touring your second album, though the size and scope of venues this time around was much, much larger. There was nothing that compared to being able to sing your own songs and have a crowd of thousands scream them right back at you.
Being an up-and-coming singer and songwriter in the genre of country music hadn't been easy. Girls your type had been a dime a dozen, hoards of Taylor Swift-wannabes covering "Teardrops on My Guitar" during open mic night. You held nothing against them; there was a path to success for everyone, but yours had been, well, different. 
It was a karaoke cover of Brooks & Dunn's "Boot Scootin' Boogie", a song that you'd been singing since you were a toddler, that had gotten you noticed by a recording artist one night while out with your girlfriends, which led you to where you stand now, performing in front of thousands. You were liked for the range of your voice, with it's easy easy transitions from the sounds of pop to country and rock, in addition to the way you performed, and your take-no-shit attitude towards the entirety of the industry. People liked that you were forward and left nothing on the table, though you had to admit that it was mostly an act, a means of coping with the pressure of working your way to the top.
///
"It's refreshing!" Jax, your manager, had shouted one day, arms flailing as you had argued that maybe your attitude was going to get you into trouble one of these days.
"Aren't you, as, you know, my manager, supposed to be the one keeps me in line?"
"You aren't out doing coke, killing anyone, public indecency and all that," he had shrugged. "Far as I'm concerned, you are in line. People talk about you because of your attitude. They like it! They like you. Why is that so hard for you to accept sometimes?"
"Maybe I just haven't been caught doing those things," you grinned, effectively dodging his question. Fame hadn't helped break down the walls that you'd long ago built around yourself. If anything, you had done some reinforcing, built a moat even, in an effort to ensure that you protected yourself from getting too close to anyone that would only end up using you in the end. You had seen the way people in life had been used, and what it ultimately led them to, and you had promised yourself long ago that even if it meant being known as the Boot Scootin' Bitch, you would protect yourself and your heart at all costs. 
"Your momma would tan your hide for much less than any of those, you know. Hell, you should be more afraid of her than you are of me or anyone else… 'cept maybe God."
///
You shake your head, working the memories free from your mind as you grab a bottle of water from the platform on which the drum set rests.
There's one more song of yours to sing before you performed a new cover, the one you had been looking forward to for months. Although you'd gotten permission to perform it not long into the start of your tour, the set list had been rehearsed already and every other detail ironed out around it. You'd convinced Jax and the crew to let you slot it into the last concert of the tour, Austin, Texas. These folks knew their music and for some reason, they liked you so you were thrilled to be able to share something new with the crowd that had welcomed you to their city with open arms. 
You grab your guitar off its stand and slide the strap over your shoulders, adjusting it as you step forwards to the mic stand. A shimmering blue shirt catches your eye in the crowd and you do a double take because surely it can't be Harry because he's—
And it's not him, of course, though the fashion of the gentleman in the pit area would surely catch his eye as well as it's right up his alley. It's not him - it can't be him - because you know exactly where he is right now and it's not in the pit of your Austin performance. 
A grin stretches over your face as you think of him. You strum the first chord of the first song you'd ever written about him, although there had been many more since. He probably knew this one was about him, having come just after your first meeting. 
/// 
A friend of yours was good friends with Kacey, who had been the guest artist that night. Her name had been added to the VIP list and in the summer of 2018, just as you were hitting your own stride in your career, you tagged along with her to Harry Styles' live tour performance in your hometown of Nashville. 
If you were being honest, prior to his concert, you hadn't heard much of his solo work, apart from the various huge hits like his Kiwi or Watermelon Sugar and a few other ballads. You liked his sound, seemingly influenced heavily by rock stars of days past, but you'd had other influences to worry about in your own side of the industry. 
Sure, he had country music connections through the likes of Kacey Musgraves and Cam, and legends like Stevie Nicks, but his pop and soft rock style was pretty far removed from most country playlists that you yourself had graced. Your genres just didn't cross paths and the two of you seemingly operated in different realms of the music industry, topping your own charts and breaking your own peer's records. 
Of course, you hadn't been completely oblivious to The Harry Styles. One Direction had been too big of a deal to ignore and you'd often found yourself bopping along to their old hits, singing along as they played amongst the other nostalgic pop hits to which you listened. 
The concert had been in June, a hot sunny day followed by a perfect breezy evening. Downtown Nashville was always busy, but that night the city seemed to buzz, bright with music and life. After meeting for drinks at Acme on the River, you allowed yourself to luxuriate in getting lost in the crowd that milled about on Broadway. It was a surprising thing to not be recognized in your hometown, but you weren't one to complain about it. It was one reason that you value your time in Nashville over other music-centric cities like Los Angeles - it seemed that people here respected the private lives of musicians. There was an odd fan here and there, but you'd lived a majority of your "famous" life in Nashville in relative peace. 
You were early to the venue, your friend having wanted to have a chance to see Kacey backstage. You were excited to finally meet the star - though you'd been around the block of fame a bit already, there would always be people that you never had an opportunity to meet in passing. You had been greeted at will call and had been led backstage.
The arena was alive with excitement. At that point, you yourself had never toured a venue that large, so the experience of being backstage and seeing the operations first hand were thrilling and a bit overwhelming. In her dressing room, Kacey pulled you straight into a hug, gushing about how excited she was to watch your career take off. She insisted on sharing her personal cell phone number with you, urging you to call her to get together on a collaboration. You were in shock leaving her room, blown away by her kindness and the way the music industry worked in the most bizarre of ways, when you turned a corner and ran smack into a tall, solid, smiling Harry Styles. His arms had come out quickly to steady you on your heels boots. 
"Fuck," you swore, shaking your head at your clumsiness. "I am so sorry. What a great way to introduce myself."
He laughed and the sound flowed through you, warm and sweet like a cup of tea with honey. "Y'alright?" His eyes looked you over, and you couldn't help but notice the way they lingered. 
Your cheeks blushed and a wave of embarrassment washed over you. "I'm the one that should be asking you that. I don't think your adoring fans would be very happy if I took you out with a textbook tackle right before you're due to go on stage." You took a moment to give him the same appreciative glance he had already given you, admiring the way his deep blue custom-beaded suit jacket fell open to reveal a black dress shirt, unbuttoned halfway down his chest. 
"Ah, 'm fine. Lil' thing like you couldn't do too much damage to me, even in those heels. Don't think they'd be very happy though," he said, nodding his head in acknowledgement of the already-rowdy crowd while offering his hand. "I'm Harry."
You laughed as you introduced yourself, shaking his hand. 
"I've heard that name before, but I'm sorry to say that I don't recognize you. You don't seem like one that's easy to forget."
"I sing, write music," you shrugged, not sure how to explain to a superstar that you were on the way up, yet still somewhere much farther down the fame totem pole than him. "Country, mostly. Not sure if that's on your radar."
"The new stuff's not, but I may have to change that." He was tapped by one of the event producers, needed for another pre-show procedure. "Where will you be tonight?" 
"To your right, in the pit."
He smiled and you had almost immediately fallen in love with the crinkles that appeared under the corners of his eyes. "I'll look out for you. It was wonderful meeting you. Oh, shit, wait, just remembered— may I?" he gestured for the phone that was in your hand and you unlocked it before passing it to him. 
You watched as he dialed a number and put the phone to his ear. He paused for a moment before he grinned. "Hi Harry, it's you from before the show. This is a message to remind you to text this number and ask the owner of it out on a date. She's the one with the beautiful smile and great tackling skills. You won"t have forgotten her. 'Kay, bye!"
You laughed at an almost embarrassing volume, blown away by his cheek. 
"Why not ask 'her' out now?" you pondered to him as he handed the phone back.
"What, and risk getting shot down? Wouldn't want to be sad and disappointed through my whole show, now would I?"
"It would make the ballads a bit more emotional," you had reasoned with a grin.
"Ouch! They're already filled with emotion, love. You'll see, I'll sing 'em right to you if I have to. Gotta run, thank you for letting me use your phone, that was a very important message!"
You laughed again as he took off. "Harry!" you had shouted to get his attention in the busy hall. He turned quickly, a small smile on his face. "She definitely won't say no, but you can wait until later to ask if you want to."
His grin stretched wider and he'd pumped a fist in the air before turning and jogging down the hallway. 
You liked to joke with anyone who knew the story that your life had changed that day all because you met Kacey. Which wasn't a complete lie - it had been her dressing room you'd come out of before slamming into Harry in the hallway. 
///
Singing the last lines of one of your songs, your stomach began to flutter in a bit of nervousness and a lot of excitement. Performing the next cover was something you had been looking forward to for months, and the moment that you got to share it with your fans was finally here. 
You retreat from the mic stand to pass your guitar off to a stagehand, taking another sip of water to settle yourself. 
"Doing alright?" Wyatt, your drummer, shouts over the pounding bass drum and you give him a thumbs up before turning back to face the crowd. 
"I've got one more cover to play for y'all tonight," you say, grasping the mic stand to keep your hands from shaking. "I've been working on getting permission to play this one for quite awhile now. I fell in love with it the first time I heard it played and now here I am, performing it for you all. It's an unreleased piece by a very, very good friend of mine, but his performances of it are all over the internet so some of you may know the words. This song is called Medicine."
The song starts out with a steady bass line and the rhythm centers you a bit, steadying any nerves that still linger. The intro gives you a minute to shake out your shoulders and get comfortable at the mic stand once more like Harry does at each performance. You catch yourself having fun mimicking him and feel thankful that you're able to perform one of your favorite songs of his. When the bass drops in pitch and the electric guitar riffs, you slide in close to the mic stand.
"Here to take my medicine, take my medicine," you sang the opening lines, already settling into the sexy rock sound of the song you and the band had rehearsed relentlessly over the last few weeks. No, the genre wasn't one you normally dabbled in, but part of the fun of performing was taking chances, risks. You had to admit, you liked the sound a lot. It tempted you to branch out a bit more on your upcoming album. 
The opening lines of the first verse throw you back into thoughts of meeting Harry that first night. You hadn't imagined what would follow the concert, let alone have the foresight to see it bringing you to this very moment in time. 
///
You had been standing outside the arena after the concert, ears buzzing and heart thumping still from the incredible show Harry had put on. As soon as he disappeared from the backstage hall earlier, you had immediately saved his number to your phone, still in disbelief over the night's events. 
Your heart had soared when your phone began to vibrate, not in a text message but in a voice call. Harry's name appeared on the screen and your friend had nudged you, clearly approving of the night's turn of events. 
"Harry," you answered, ready to praise him halfway to Sunday on his performance. 
"Let me take you out," he interrupted you. "Right now. Please? Anywhere you want to go." 
You laughed and paused. "Yeah, okay. I might know of a place."
There was a lot of shuffling on his end before his voice came back on the line. "Might've had to do another fist pump."
"Told you she wouldn't say no."
"Where are you?" You heard the smile in his voice, already familiar with it. 
"Demonbreun and John Lewis, headed towards the park."
"Give me 10, I'll pick you up." He paused. "Be careful, okay?"
"I'll stick with the hoards of your fans milling about, maybe ask some of them for the hot gossip on you while I wait."
"Don't believe anything they say," he said, and you could tell he was still smiling as he hung up. 
He and his driver arrived shortly after, Harry's hair damp and covered with a baseball cap, dressed down in black pants and a simple loose white shirt, tattoos peeking out everywhere you looked. He exited the car and opened the back door for you, helping you balance as you stepped up into the large Suburban. 
"We'll go to Pecker's," you said to his driver, laughing as Harry snorted next to you. "Shut up, it's just a bar. Take a right up here onto 24 and it'll take us all the way to Fairfield. It'll be on the right."
He looked at you and smiled before reaching out to hold your hand in the middle seat between you. 
Taking Harry to Pecker's had just felt right. It was where you'd been discovered, where all of your adventures had started, and you weren't sure why but you wanted to share that small part of you with him after watching him up on stage that night. 
"Won't people recognize you? I looked you up before the show, you're apparently a pretty big deal around here." He had asked, smirking, sipping on the locally-brewed beer that Clint, the regular bartender, was serving that night. 
"Locals are pretty good about not interrupting our normal lives. Pecker's isn't as well known to tourists either, so it's a good hideout. This is where a lot of producers, executives and all the other professionals come to unwind." You ignored his comment on your fame and had taken a sip of your margarita instead. "Unless, of course, there's a drag show scheduled, then it's a bit of a madhouse."
Harry laughs into his drink and you grin. "So," he started after a pause, twiddling with the rings on his right hand. "What'd you think?"
"It was incredible," you said without hesitation. "Truly one of the best live shows I've seen in a long time, country acts included. You've got such a magnetism about you that people can't help but want to watch." You blushed a bit, alcohol and the quick comfort of him loosening your lips. "The whole water spraying trick was hot," you admit, making him blush. "And don't tell Stevie, but I think I might prefer your version of The Chain."
"Sacrilege! That's some incredibly high praise," he said, a small smile teasing at the corners of his mouth. 
"Earned and deserved," you said, tilting your glass to his. "Honestly, Harry, you're an incredible musician. There aren't many out there that have the whole package like that."
"What about you? You seem like the whole package."
"I don't know if I'd say that. If you looked me up, you've likely seen what they say about me. 'My attitude won't get me far' and all. But I don't think it's my attitude, so much as it is my willingness to take the risks that others won't. I'm not out here to make music that's just there to be sold. Hell, I couldn't care less about the money. All I want is to create music that makes me feel fulfilled, and I think that honesty scares them." You twirled your finger in the condensation of the glass in front of you. You glanced up to his face finding his eyes already on yours, holding your gaze steadily. "It doesn't scare you, does it?"
"It's the most refreshing thing I've heard in a while. Not many people in the industry are fearless in the face of failure like that."
"I'm definitely not fearless; I just refuse to change who I am to make a buck."
"Who are you then?" Harry had asked, and telling him your story was easy. You couldn't understand how it was so natural, opening up to a stranger, but as the conversation wore on, you realized how similar you and Harry were in terms of the way you conducted your professional lives and that was without apology. 
And you also realized, as the evening continued and you and Harry crept your bar stools closer and closer to one another, feet and knees bumping, his fingers tracing the ridges of your knuckles as you shared life stories like long lost friends, that you didn't want it to end. 
///
"He's acting like a gentleman," you continue, changing up the lyrics slightly as you finish the first verse. The line always made you smile and you let yourself briefly flash back into your reminiscing about the night you'd met Harry, and how, even though he had acted gentlemanly upon dropping you off for the evening, you wanted to be anything but a gentlewoman. 
///
After enjoying drinks late into the evening at Pecker's, Harry had insisted on having his driver take you home rather than allowing you to call an Uber. 
"Such a gentleman," you commented as he opened the car door for you once again. 
"Maybe my gentlemanly actions have motives," he said, sliding his hand along your lower back as you step past him and into the car. Your grin matched his smirk as he shut the door and you decided that he'd been right - not calling an Uber was the right thing to do.
The car ride back to your apartment building was too quick and before you knew it, he was at your door again, offering a hand for you to hold for balance as you exited the car. Neither of you let go as you walked through the lobby towards the elevators. 
"You're uh— You're welcome to come up, if you'd like," you said, suddenly shy but not wanting to chicken out on asking for what you wanted, asking for some continuation of this sweet but likely brief meeting between you two. "For a drink, I mean, or to keep chatting, you know."
Harry smiled and glanced around the empty lobby. His hand in yours smoothed up the length of your arm, over your shoulder, and came to rest at your jaw. "I'd love to, believe me. You have no idea how much I want to." He leaned towards you, pressing a quick kiss to your forehead and your skin burned at the contact of his lips. "But I want to do this the right way. Don't want you to get the wrong idea of me."
"What if I want the wrong idea of you?"
He laughed, the sound open and honest and it had given you hope. "You called me a gentleman earlier and I have to admit that I liked it, coming from you. Would like to keep up the facade that I am, even if it's just for a bit." His face searched yours, each of you trying to read the thoughts that were flying through one another's minds. "You have beautiful lips," he whispered suddenly, his accent thicker than it had been all night. 
Your mouth quirked into a smile, unable to do anything but preen at his compliment. "You do too," you replied, just as softly. 
"Can I kiss you?"
"Please, yes." Before the words had settled he was kissing you, slowly and with too much care, like you would break if he wasn't gentle enough. It was over much too quick but you knew you would remember every moment of it for the rest of your life. 
"Christ, I'd wanted to do that all night." His thumb smoothed over your cheekbone, smiling when you leaned into the touch. He glanced up as the elevator doors swung open and gently nudged you towards them. "Thank you, truly, for a wonderful evening. I promise to give you a call soon."
"I'll send Kacey after you if you don't!" you laughed, stepping into the lift.
"Good night darling." He winked and the doors slid shut, leaving you alone with your thoughts and the delicious ghost of his lips on yours. 
///
"Give me that adrenaline, that adrenaline, think I'm gonna stick with you," you finish the first verse as Ryann rips through the chords on her guitar. You loved that the song built slowly, and even though that meant a quieter beginning, it promised an explosive end. 
Though the crowd had been hesitant at first, you can see that the first few rows of them are nodding along, countless phones out recording the performance. You know that somewhere out there at your request is a member of your press team, professionally filming the cover. You may only be doing it once, but you were determined to make sure you would never forget it.
///
You had enough time at home to check some of your social media accounts, shower and get comfortable in bed before your phone rang again. For the second time that day, your heart soared seeing Harry's name light up your screen.
"If you're going to say that you're downstairs because you've reconsidered my offer for that nightcap, I'll need a few moments to prepare as I'm currently in my pajamas," you said as a greeting and you were met with his warm laughter once again.
"No, no, I had to go back to the arena for a bit anyways, pack up and all of that," he said, still chuckling. "I just— I wanted to make sure you weren't offended by me declining your offer. Because I wanted to— I didn't want the night to end there. There's something about you that's… Transfixing. And I don't want to ruin that and make you think you're just a fling."
"That's quite a compliment," you said, a bit awed by his words.
"What was it you said earlier, "earned and deserved", yeah?" He said, quoting your toast to him at the bar, making you grin. "I want you to be more than that. I'd like to get to know you, the gentlemanly way."
"Okay. Will we have a chaperone at our next date then?" He laughed but didn't correct your referral to that evening as a date. You had snuggled a bit deeper into the sheets, still disbelieving that all of this had been the result of being dragged along to a concert. 
"No chaperones," he chuckled, "but yes, I do want to take you out again, if you'd let me."
"Hmm," you jokingly pondered aloud, as if answering with anything other than a resounding "yes" was on your mind. "I suppose I could fit something into my schedule."
"I hope that's a yes."
"Of course it's a yes! I didn't want the night to end either. And don't you dare say that you just did another fist pump," you had laughed, hearing the familiar shuffling of the phone on his end of the line.
"Me? Never!"
"You're adorable," you had said, a smile stuck on your face.
"And you're beautiful. Two can play this game."
There had been a comforting silence between you for a moment before you had spoken up again. "Harry?"
"Yeah, love?"
You had blushed at the pet name but loved the way it sounded being directed your way. "Thank you," you had whispered. 
"Should be me thanking you. Sleep well sweetheart." You'd fallen asleep with your phone in hand, hopeful that you wouldn't wake up the next morning to realize it had all been a dream.
/// 
It hadn't been a dream, and here you were, nearly two years later, performing one of the songs that Harry himself had sung the night that you'd begun falling for him.
The second verse continued quickly and you let the lyrics wash over you as you sang, loving the way the rock energy of the song sounded with a bit of your band's country influence. 
"Here to take my medicine, take my medicine, rest it on your fingertips," you sang, holding your pointer finger in the air much like Harry did every time he performed the song before bringing it to your lips as you sang the next line. "Up to your mouth, feeling it out, feeling it out."
/// 
Beginning to date Harry - properly date him too, not just make FaceTime calls to one another from across the world and sending texts back and forth until the wee hours of the morning thanks to the differences in time zones, sharing everything and more with one another as best you could digitally - had been the most exhilarating experience of your life, and you had performed in front of sold out crowds and accepted awards on live television. His tour was due to stretch on for almost another month throughout North America and the next time you saw him was when you'd been invited as Harry's guest to his show in Chicago just a few weeks after you'd met. 
While he had put on an incredible show for the United Center, there had been moments that felt like he was performing just for you, glancing over to where you stood in the Friends and Family area, meeting your eyes and grinning. By that point, you could sing along to every song of his and you knew he loved it, loved watching you dance along to the music that he had created and was performing. 
In a moment where you were thankful for the differences between the genres in which you two performed, you hadn't been recognized at all by his fans. You'd both talked about wanting to keep things quiet as you got to know one another, and you hadn't wanted a relationship with him, an already incredibly famous artist, to somehow influence the trajectory of yours. While it had been easy when you were apart, being together without seemingly being together was difficult. Especially in that moment, when all you wanted to do was curl up into him and soak in the post-show bliss with him. Instead, you sat on the couch with him, a cushion apart from one another, holding his hand tightly while you chatted about the concert. 
"Someone is gonna notice that you looked to my side of the pit constantly all night," you said and he grinned guiltily. 
"I like knowing you're in the crowd," he shrugged. "Besides," he scooted closer and threw his arm around you before dragging you in close, "you look incredible, how could I not want to stare at you all night?"
"Anyone could walk in," you pointed out, watching as his eyes followed your lips. 
"Just want a little taste," he said, moving in closer, "Haven't I earned a kiss from my girlfriend after all of that work up on stage?"
Your eyebrows raised in surprise as you looked at him and he seemingly realized his slip-up. 
"I mean— What I meant was— Shit," he scrubbed a hand over his face but you could tell he was hiding a grin. "Wasn't exactly how I wanted to ask you, but… Will you officially be my girlfriend?"
"Yes, H. I'm all yours."
"Love it when you call me H." He pulled you in for a kiss that you both lost yourselves in, finally able to experience the feeling of one another after being denied it for so long. When a knock at the dressing room door came, Harry had to all but drag himself away from you, hair disheveled and lips swollen, scowling at the door. 
You threw your head back and laughed as he stalked over and pulled it open with a flourish. 
"What?"
"The hell's your issue?" you heard Mitch ask before Harry widened the door so he could see you laughing on the couch. You raised a hand in greeting and Harry's scowl deepened as Mitch chuckled, taking in both of your disheveled appearances. "Oh, shit, hey, sorry. Uh, car's ready when you are. See you tomorrow bud." 
"Harry!" you chided once he'd closed the door in Mitch's face, giggles still bubbling out of your mouth. "He was just being polite."
"Interrupting arse is what he is," Harry said, sitting down and pulling you into his lap. "Where were we?"
You threw your arms around his neck and pressed your body as close to his as possible, hoping that he'd thought to lock the door before returning to your embrace. "Right about here, I think." With a hand on your hip, sliding under your shirt to reach warm skin and one at the back of your neck, Harry kissed you until you were breathless and not only wanting more but very seriously needing it. 
"Come back to the hotel with me," he murmured against your lips as you ground your body down on him, reveling in the way the action made him throw his head against the back of the couch and exhale sharply. 
"You sure?" Your hands smoothed over the chest of his skin, tracing the dark swallows with your fingertips as you rolled your hips. 
He shuddered at the light touch and gripped your hips tightly, pressing his up as you pressed yours down and the action made you sigh, the pressure a delicious tease of what was hopefully to come. "Absolutely," he said, his grin telling you he was pleased with the noises he was causing you to make. "Want you so bad, like I won't be able to breathe right until I properly have you."
You leaned in to kiss at his neck, his shower-damp curls tickling your cheek. "The feeling is mutual. Adored watching you up on stage tonight. Have I told you yet how much I love seeing you perform?" You nuzzle at his neck, urging him to tilt his head back farther, exposing more of his skin to you. 
"Yeah, you have, but tell me again," he sighed, his hands running up and down your back. 
"It's like when you get on stage no one else before or after you matters," you said honestly, letting your lips against his skin hide how truthful you were really being, spilling all of your thoughts about seeing Harry up on stage. It was scary, feeling so deeply for him already. But you wanted him to know, at least in part, what it meant to be able to watch him perform. "Something about your live voice just makes my breath catch in my throat, I can't get enough of it."
Harry breathed deeply for a moment, working to center himself while you nosed at the curls around his ear and heaped praise upon him. 
"It's like you connect with every person out in the crowd, like you're singing just for them. You can tell that you're having fun and people want to join you in that. They know you love the attention," you whispered and he hummed in appreciation (or agreement), the sound low in his throat. "They'd stay out there all night for if they could, screaming about how much they love you."
"And you feed into it, playing it up for them. You know exactly what you're doing when you get to act a little bit naughty up there, driving them all mad," you said with a smile. 
He chuckled and you could hear and feel the sound rumble through him. "Played it up for you tonight. Did it work?" 
"You mean did it make me want to jump your bones the second you came off stage? Yeah, it worked."
"Fucking hell," he said, holding you close with his hands on your butt as he stood up. "Our first time is not going to be in a dressing room so we need to go now."
He let you slide down his body and held you steady as you balanced on your legs. "Would be pretty fitting though, don't you think, given how we met and what we do?"
"Yeah, but then I'd think about it every time I was in one. You wanna torture me relentlessly?" He pulled you tight against him, kissing you once more before separating to grab his bags. 
"Yeah, relentless torture sounds like something I might be into." 
He glanced up at your words, eyes dark and hungry, a smirk on his lips. "Careful what you wish for, love." 
///
The bass line increased behind the riff of Ryann's guitar and you leaned into the mic stand, eyes closing as you continued singing the first bridge. "I had a few, got drunk on you and now I'm wasted, and when I sleep I'm gonna dream of how you…"
There were a few fans of yours and Harry's who apparently knew the words as they helped you out, screaming the unwritten word that finished the sentence: "tasted."
///
Harry was quick to say goodbye to everyone on the team before pulling you quickly through back hallways and down quiet staircases, sneaking quick kisses when he was sure there was no one around. You were both out of breath when you finally climbed into the car, grinning like kids getting away with sneaking around. 
The hotel ride was quick, mercifully, but Harry had been anything but patient, his hand at your knee creeping up slowly, closer and closer to the hem of your dress, toying with the hem while he chatted with the driver. 
"I'm gonna head in first with Martin and Eric will loop around and drop you off at the side entrance. I would wait in the lobby for you but this hotel hasn't been the best in the past with uh— containing sensitive information, we'll say, so Martin will meet you on your floor to get your stuff, then bring you up. Is that okay?"
"You sound like you've done this before, Styles," you said with a wink, using humor to cover the nerves that had settled in the pit of your stomach. 
He blushed and you loved knowing you got under his skin so easily. "The band used to stay here when we toured… and I was young and dumb once, yes."
"Just giving you a hard time, H."
His grin stretched as he leaned over to peck your lips once more. "See you in a minute, love."
Harry climbed out and the driver took off once again, slowly circling the block. "He's quite taken with you, you know," he said, glancing up in the rear view mirror as he parked the car at the curb. He got out and opened the door for you in the empty street then used his keycard to unlock the heavy side door of the hotel.
"Thank you," you said, both for his actions and his omission about Harry. Sure, you had talked to him as often as possible over the last weeks and had yourself been on the receiving end of his attention, but it felt validating to hear that Harry's feelings for you may have gone a bit farther than just a small crush if people around him had also noticed his behavior. 
Harry's bodyguard was waiting by the elevators and escorted you to your room to gather your luggage, then led you to Harry's door.
"Car'll be around about 9 tomorrow morning, H. Flight's at 10:30." He turned to you. "I understand you have business to continue here in Chicago?"
"Yes, meetings tomorrow and then I fly back to Nashville in the evening."
"There'll be a driver ready for you tomorrow as well. He's been instructed to take you wherever you need to go and he'll stay until you depart. Have a nice evening," he nodded at Harry, who was smiling in the doorway, before departing.
"You didn't have to do that for me, I could've managed by getting an Uber," you said, stepping into the room past Harry to set your bags down and kick your shoes off. 
"I didn't, was Martin's idea; says he doesn't want anything to happen to the one thing that's made me so happy these last few weeks."
"Oh yeah? I'm the one thing, huh?"
"You're everything, honestly," he replied a bit sheepishly, taking your hands in his. "Think I might like you a bit more than I already should. Lettin' my heart get a bit ahead of my head, I suppose."
"Yeah, I know the feeling," you said softly and he beamed. 
He moved his hands up to cup your face, pulling you close for a sweet kiss that quickly turned insistent, heat rising between the two of you. Harry slid his hands under the hem of your shirt to rest where your spin ended and yours wrapped around his neck, dragging him down to you as you stepped behind you towards the bed. His long legs tangled with yours and you tumbled backwards, laughing as you hit the plush bed and Harry collapsed on top of you.
He propped himself up on his elbows and looked down at you with a smile, pushing the hair that had fallen into your face aside. "Hi baby," he said softly.
"Hi."
"Missed you," he said, leaning down for another sweet kiss. 
"We were apart for like, eight minutes," you giggled between his kisses, your laughter giving way to a sigh as he moved to press a kiss to your nose, your cheek, your chin.
"Doesn't matter," he breathed into the crook of your neck, pressing small open mouth kisses to the soft skin there, "Any time apart is too long."
"The two weeks left of the tour will fly by. You should enjoy them while you can."  
"Wish you could come with me, love performing for you." He kissed his way across the base of your neck, collarbone to collarbone as his fingers trailed to the small straps on your shoulders. "Would you like to take this off?"
"Please," you sighed, desperate and aching for the feeling of his skin against yours. 
Your first time sleeping with Harry had been exactly what you'd wanted and expected - hot and fast, admittedly over a bit more quickly than either of you had wanted, but worth the weeks of wait. 
Harry's skill set hadn't ended at singing and playing instruments. If anything, his vast experience using his hands and mouth only helped him excel in other pastimes that also utilized those parts of his body. To both of your delights, he had proven his adeptness in all areas multiple times that night, and once again in the morning before he had to rush into the shower, dragging you along with him simply to get more time together before you were forced apart once again. 
/// 
You had spent the next two months away from one another, Harry having wrapped his tour and immediately beginning work on his next album. You'd spent your own time mixed between writing and recording an upcoming single. You had already written a handful of songs that were inspired by him and you'd wondered, albeit a bit nervously, if the sentiment was shared. When he stopped in Nashville on a long layover, pushing his flight back even longer to stay with you for another night, you'd tried to pry the information out of him. Unfortunately, no amount of sexual teasing or denial had convinced him — he, however, had you singing like a canary almost immediately, teasing you in the best way about how easily you opened up for him, telling him all about the music that he had already inspired.
You had been FaceTiming him late one night weeks later, both tired from long days spent in the studio. He had suddenly gotten shy, biting at the skin around his fingernails. 
"Hey, stop that. What's the matter H?"
"Wanna ask you something," he mumbled, but a smile was peeking through where his fingers were still at his lips. "Jus' don't know how to."
"Baby," you sighed, "you can ask me anything. Y'know that." 
"I know, I know." He paused and took a deep breath before a wide smile stretched across his face. "Would you maybe want to come home with me this Christmas? To London? Wouldn't be for long, maybe just a couple nights, I just wanna introduce you to my mum already, she's been pestering me nonstop lately 'bout meetin' you and Gem's joined in on it now too, so it's two against one when they call and I've told them that—"
"Harry," you said chucking, trying to interrupt his nervous rambling.
"—and she actually called me Harold last time she told me to bring you 'round and that got me a bit worried so I—"
"Harry! Of course I'll come with you. I'd absolutely love to."
You met him at the airport weeks later, desperate to pull him close and kiss him silly in the confines of his darkly tinted car, but you refrained, knowing how seriously Harry took the protection of your relationship from the press. You may not have been able to see anyone straining to capture pictures of you two, but you knew there was always the chance. 
It was an entirely different story, however, when he'd finally pulled the car past the mechanical gate and into his private drive. You both reached for each other immediately, arms tangled and shifter knob pressed uncomfortably against your side, but perfectly content so long as his lips were against yours. 
"Fuck— I missed you�� so much," he muttered between kisses. He pulled away, forehead resting against yours, sly smirk pulling at his lips. "Mum won't expect us for a few hours at least."
"What is it that you're insinuating, Mr. Styles?"
"That there's plenty of time to give you a tour around the house, that's all," he said innocently. He gave you a sweet smile before hopping out of the car and coming to the passenger side where he helped you out and picked up your bags.
You were eager to be given a house tour, more than keen to learn all of the things you could about his London life. The house was decorated in a way that made you smile - eclectic but with a definitive air of cohesive taste. It suited Harry to an absolute tee. From the artwork that decorated the walls to the mismatched but homey furniture, you could tell immediately that this was Harry's sanctuary - every inch of the home screamed his name. 
"It's incredible," you said as he led you into the largest room, the master. He walked over to the dresser that sat under the window and pulled open the top two drawers. 
"I know we won't be here long, this time around, but I cleaned out a few drawers for you here, if you want to unpack some things. And there's space in the closet for you too," he nodded towards the door on the other side of the room, dragging a hand through his hair as he talked, "I had too much in there anyways and some of it needed to go and I wanted you to be able to leave some things, if you felt comfortable, of if Mum drags us out shopping and you don't want to take it all home now you can leave it here and-"
"You- you cleared out a drawer for me?"
"Well, yeah," he said, resting his hand on the back of his neck. "Made some space for you in the bathroom too, though I doubt it'll be enough, with all that you bring along to fix yourself up." He paused and thought for a moment. "I know how our lives are. I just wanted you to have some of your own space here; want you to feel as comfortable in my home as I do. Is that too much?" 
"H," you said with a sigh, your lips curling into a smile, "it's perfect, and so thoughtful. I'm sorry I haven't done the same for you in Nashville yet."
"'s alright, love. I've already got a toothbrush there at least. I can take some time when we fly back to come and help if you'd like me to. As long as you don't end up wearing all the clothes that I leave there," he chuckled.
"You know me too well," you said, reaching for his hand. He lifted your entwined fingers to his lips to brush a kiss over your knuckles.
"You do look good in my clothes," he confessed, pulling you close to face him. "Look good in my house. But you always look good anyways."
"Said the pot to the kettle," you said with a smile. "I like being here already," you shrug, hands resting on his shoulders. "It feels like you, like home. Thank you for inviting me," you add, as though the measly voicing of your appreciation is enough to convey what you truly feel. 
"You're welcome anytime, if I'm here or not."
"You trust me that much?"
"Yeah, I do. I'll get you a key and everything." He leaned down to kiss you slowly, relearning the map of your lips and mouth, before pulling away. He laughed when you made a noise of protest.
"The bathroom's over here if you'd like to freshen up." He had pulled at your hand, stepping towards the other open door in the room. "Figured a shower might sound nice after a long day in an airplane. Besides, I've gotta clean up before we go to Mum's anyways."
"Gonna join me?" 
"Yeah, thought I might, if that's okay." His smirk had been wicked as he pushed you the rest of the way into the bathroom. He dropped your hand to reach for the hem of his shirt, pulling it over his head quickly. As he reached for the buckle of his pants, he had met your staring eyes. "See something you like, love?"
You definitely had, though you didn't think your attraction — physically or emotionally — for Harry had stopped at something that was as weak as "like." Getting to know him over the last six months had made you worry that there wasn't ever going to be anyone else like him, anyone that made you feel like he did. You had fallen for him, desperately hard, and the realization of it as you stood in front of his half-naked self almost embarrassed you. 
"Babe? You alright?" he asked as he stripped down to his boxers. 
"Yeah, you just got me all distracted," you had grinned, pulling your sweatshirt and remaining clothes off quickly before joining Harry under the warm spray of the water.
Meeting Harry's mom that evening went better than you could've ever dreamt it would. The two of you got on like old friends, and Harry had stared, almost in wonder, at how easily you seemed to bond with her. And then he had stared in horror as Anne offered to pull out the photo albums filled with pictures from Harry's childhood, particularly when Anne offered up the album filled with photos from Harry's and Gemma's emo phases. 
As the evening wore on, you caught Harry on more than one occasion glancing your way, cheeks bright from the red wine he was sipping on and eyes warmly reflecting the bright Christmas lights. He always looked like he was a split second away from saying something, only to shake his head and look away with a small smile. 
Later, in bed, Harry pulled you close to him. He was laying on his back, you on your side, and you threw a leg over his waist, soaking in all of the cuddles you could get on this short trip together. The room was only illuminated by the ambient light coming in through the blinds. 
"Mum liked you a lot," he murmured, gently stroking the skin at the base of your spine, "said I should hang onto you". 
You returned the gesture, running your fingertips along the lines of ink that make up his many tattoos. "I liked her too. She's wonderful, I see where you get it from now."
"Hey now, 'm wonderful all on my own!" He tickled your side and you couldn"t help but arch towards him, shrieking and laughing at the touch. 
"Stop that! You are an absolute pest, you know that?" you said, grinning up at him.
"Ah, you love me," he whispered, and his joking tone made you smile but the way he pulled you tighter as he said it made you brave. 
You let the weight what you were about to say wash over you, aware that things were going to change forever with just a few words. "I do love you, Harry," you whispered, moving up his body to press a kiss to his lips.
"Thank God," he had said, wrapping his arms back around you and pulling you on top of him. "Cause I love you too."
Leaving Harry after that had been even more difficult. All you wanted to do was be with him, but you had too much coming up with the future release of your album and Harry was still in the midst of doing his own writing and recording. 
It was your professions, along with the desire to keep your relationship private, that kept you apart. You weren't sure how you did it, but your relationship had withstood the distance and odd-hours. The only step now would be deciding if, when, and how to confirm the suspicions to tabloids and fans alike that you were an item.
The wait was killing you. All you wanted was to show off to the world that Harry was yours.
///
The bridge of the song was followed quickly by the chorus and the heavy guitar and pounding drums had you rocking on your feet, body swaying into the mic stand as you let yourself get lost in the lyrics. "If you go out tonight, I'm going out 'cause I know you're persuasive."
The crowd was even more into the song now, many picking up on the words quickly and screaming them along with your singing. The rock and roll vibe of the song was coursing through you and the crowd, the arena electric with energy already. 
"You got that something, I got me an appetite, now I can taste it."
You remove the mic from the stand and dance towards one end of the stage, singing as you move to the beat. "We're getting dizzy, oh, we're getting dizzy, oh! La da da da da! You get me dizzy, oh, you get me dizzy, oh!"
///
You had been on the phone with Harry one day in July, nearly five months after the release of your album, having him help you decide what the setlist of your tour would be when it began in November. 
"I wish I could cover one of your songs."
He had laughed and slurped his tea, the sounds comforting to you, even over the phone. "That'd be a bit obvious, wouldn't it love?"
"I don't mean cover Golden or Kiwi," you said, tapping your pen against the pad of paper in front of you. "What about one you wrote for 1D? What about Perfect? Or Stockholm Syndrome! That was always one of my favorites."
"Getting permission on those might be a bit more difficult, s'not just me that's gotta sign off on it. Besides, do you really wanna be the artist that covers a One Direction song on her own headlining tour?"
"Guess I'll stick with singing along to them in the shower then."
You were both quiet for a moment, lost in your own thoughts. 
"What if I covered Medicine?" you asked suddenly, realizing it was the perfect compromise, not to mention your favorite song that Harry himself performed oh his own tour. The rock sound wasn't a far cry from the roots that country music had and you knew it would sound great. "Even if it was just for one stop!"
"Hmm," Harry mused. "It would sound great with the band, I'll give you that. But videos will go around, people will know it's my song you're singing and they'll connect the dots about us."
"H, I'm ready for that if you are. I love you, and I'm ready to be able to share that love that I have for you with the world. Sneaking around has been fun but I want people to know how proud of you I am and how much you're loved and appreciated. Half of our fans know already, it's just a matter of us confirming it. I think that we could really-"
Harry was laughing at your rambling on the other end of the line. "Alright, alright, you drive a hard bargain, love. I think you're right, maybe it is time we stopped sneaking around. I'll try, but Jax and everyone else still have to agree to it too. It might be easier to convince everyone if it's just a one time thing. Pick another cover, something you'd normally do, in case it takes some time to work things out."
"I'll ask him right now! Thank you Harry!"
"I just have one condition," he said, and you could hear the grin that was surely pulling at the corners of his lips. 
"What's that?"
"I get to perform it with you," he had said, and the smile already on your face widened exponentially. "If we're finally gonna make "us" public, may as well do it with a bang."
///
In the moment after the chorus, an 8 count beat is carried by the drummer and guitarist. For this performance, and the only performance you'd put on of this song, you had rehearsed the 8 count repeating once between the chorus and the next verse, as you needed a bit of extra time to announce your guest performer. 
"Ladies and gentlemen," you shout into the mic, grin wide and face beaming already at what was about to take place. "To help me finish this performance, please help me welcome my very good friend, Harry Styles!"
Harry emerges from behind the stage holding his own wireless mic as much of the crowd screams - he may not be a country artist, but he was absolutely known worldwide. You step back with a wave of your arm, smiling as he begins the next chorus. His performance is for the crowd but he's singing the words directly to you. 
"Tingle running through my bones, fingers to my toes, tingle running through my bones," he sings, voice smooth like whiskey, and the crowd adores him, eating out of the palm of his hand. "The boys and the girls are in, I mess around with them, and I'm OK with it." 
You can't help but dance as he sings, his voice and the energy of the crowd propelling you to move. He watches you, eyes no longer on the crowd, as he sings the next lines. Immediately, heat pools low in your belly at his glance and the words. 
"I'm coming down, I figured out I kinda like it. And when I sleep I'm gonna dream of how you…"
You gyrate your hips at the unsung line of "ride it", listening with a sly grin as some in the crowd scream the two words that go unsung. 
///
After giving him a key, Harry had moved some of his clothes to your apartment in Nashville some time while you were away on the first leg of your tour. He had found the city to be incredibly welcoming and inspirational for his upcoming album and had decided to stay there for a spell while you continued to tour around the country. 
You had scheduled a short break between your concerts over New Years, wanting to be able to grab at least one or two nights at home with him to celebrate the holiday before you were back on the road again. 
"So fucking glad you're home," Harry panted, pulling your shirt over your head before attaching his lips to yours once again. "Missed you like crazy."
"Missed you too," you moaned as his lips moved downwards, across your neck and over your collarbones, down the valley between your breasts. Before he could reach around to unhook your bra, you reached for his shirt, as desperate as he was to see and touch what you'd been missing. 
As he pulled the half-unbuttoned blouse over his head, you pulled your leggings off and reached for him, pushing him back onto the bed behind him. He unbuttoned his pants as he scooted up towards the middle of the bed, shoving them and his boxers off in one swoop. 
You climbed on top of him, hurriedly reaching to kiss him as you rubbed your clothed center along the length of his hard cock. 
"Fuck," he hissed, throwing his head back to allow you room to kiss his neck. "Desperate aren't you, darling?"
"Want you so bad it hurts," you whispered, sucking a bright hickey right where it would absolutely be seen by anyone.
You moved to continue kissing down his chest but he stopped you with a hand under your arm. "Not gonna last long, love. Wanna be inside you."
His cheeks and chest were flushed bright red, lips puffy and pupils blown wide. This was when you loved him most, being able to have him like no one else did. The same feeling always hit you at certain moments, particularly ones of domesticity, like when you watched him back the car out of the driveway or when he stood in the kitchen in the morning in nothing but socks, boxers, and his ratty old robe, singing along to old big band jazz as he waited for the coffee to brew. There was Harry Styles the musician, Harry Styles the actor, and Harry Styles the performer, but then there was your Harry. 
"Yeah, okay," you sighed, moving off of him quickly to remove your bra and panties. You climbed back onto the bed and threw your leg over his hips, straddling him. He immediately reached for you and pulled you flush against his chest, his lips capturing yours in a bruising kiss. 
You rocked your hips against him as he held you, your slick arousal gliding along his length, drawing a moan from both of you. 
"Baby, please," he panted, and you could only mod in agreement, lost already to the sweeping feeling of your close release. 
His hands rested on your hips as you positioned him at the entrance between your legs. You groaned in harmony as you worked down him slowly, the only sound in the room was your shared heavy breathing and gasps. 
"Fuck me," he sighed as you set a slow pace, rocking on top of him to reach each spot that you know will get you there. 
"Workin' on it," you grin. A quick swivel of your hips hit at just the right angle and you tossed your head back, repeating the movement over and over again until you shuddered with a final snap of tension, your orgasm rolling over you as Harry helped you move, hands tight on your hips, to wring all you could from the release. 
"You look so beautiful right now, like a fuckin' angel," Harry said, voice low and gravely, accent thick with need. 
"How's that line go?" you said as you slowed down, smirking when a harsh rock of your hips caused Harry to moan. "'Turns out she's a devil in between the sheets'?"
"Fuck," he groaned again, eyes closed tightly. "Can't just go reciting my own lyrics to me while I"m buried in ya like this, love."
"And there's nothing you can do about it," you continued, singing the line of his song this time, and his hips buck up into yours harshly.
"You're gonna pay for that," he had said, quoting another of his songs, before he had flipped you over onto your back and set his own brutal pace.
///
Like he can read your thoughts, Harry beams and wags a finger in your direction and the crowd screams at your chemistry together. You grab your mic from its stand and take a step towards Harry to sing the chorus together.
"If you go out tonight, I'm going out 'cause I know you're persuasive." Harry dances off to the side of the stage, performing once again for the crowd. 
You dance at center stage with your wireless mic, too excited about performing with Harry that you can't stand in one spot. The music and Harry's energy make you want to move. "You got that something, I got me an appetite, now I can taste it." 
"We're getting dizzy, oh, we're getting dizzy, oh! La da da da da!" Harry throws his head back, singing along in his own world and you can't look away from him. He really was a rockstar and getting to share the stage with him like this was an experience you'd never forget. 
"You get me dizzy, oh, you get me dizzy, oh!"
There's a great pause in the lyrics where the guitar, keyboard, and drums play together, increasing the tension of the song. You and Harry take off towards opposite ends of the stage, both reveling in the performance for the crowd as you dance and stomp to the beat. Eventually, with a slide down the keys of the keyboard, the instrumental quiets into just the steady beat of the bass line joined by the hi-hats. 
You and Harry urge the crowd to clap along as you both return to the middle of the stage to sing together once again. He always said that this portion of the song was one of his favorites to perform, the repeated line from the bridge ending abruptly with the lights going out before flashing back on, the added theatrics of the performance elevating the climax of the song completely. Having rehearsed that Harry would sing the following chorus alone, you let yourself get lost in his gaze as it settles on you.
You stand facing one another behind the mic stand, once again singing more to one another rather than to the crowd. You step closer towards him as the lyrics progress, nearly chest to chest now with your voices sharing one another's mics. "I had a few, got drunk on you and now I'm—"
Before you can sing the last word of the line and the lights can blink out as rehearsed, Harry leans forwards and captures your mouth in a hungry kiss. The crowd erupts with screams as the lights above the stage go dark.
You can feel rather than hear him say the words "I love you" against your lips and you have just enough time to repeat them back to him before the drums and guitar pick the beat up once again, the lights flashing back on brightly. He moves away and continues to sing the chorus that follows as if nothing had happened. You're a bit stunned, not having prepared for his relationship-revealing public display of affection to happen during your performance of his song but it was perfect and he knows it. Your smile is wide and you can't help but stand rooted where you are and laugh at what has just finally happened.
"If you go out tonight, I'm going out 'cause I know you're persuasive," he sings, smirking at you while you blush across from him. 
You join him in singing the last lines, your right hand joining his left hand where everyone can see your fingers entwine. 
"You got that something, I got me an appetite, now I can taste it. We're getting dizzy, oh, we're getting dizzy, oh!"
You urge the crowd with a waving hand to join in and they do, singing along with you and Harry. "La da da da da! You get me dizzy, oh, you get me dizzy, oh!"
The drums and guitar end the song on five quick beats and the crowd erupts once again in screams. You immediately jump towards Harry, throwing your arms around his neck in a close embrace. His hands wrap around your waist to hold you close, and you can feel him smile where his face is pressed close to your jaw.
"How was that?" he asks, chuckling against you.
"It was perfect, you're perfect. Thank you, H. For everything."
"Can take you on a proper date now, yeah? Wanna show my girl off to the world."
"Yes, please!" You can't wipe the smile from your face as he sets you down and Harry continues to beam at you as the crowd continues screaming, reeling from your shared performance. 
Harry nudges you gently before turning back to them, lifting his and your arms high in the air and leading you in bending for a bow. He steps away from you and turns, opening his arms wide to you for the crowd to praise and you laugh, tearing up at his gesture and the overwhelming emotions of the performance while you take another bow just for yourself. 
He pulls you into another hug and you can't help but angle your face up towards him, wordlessly asking for another very quick, very public kiss.
He glances down at you, smiling. "You're gonna love this now, aren't you?"
"Course I am. love showing them you're mine."
He leans down to peck your forehead, your nose, and finally, your lips, as the crowd goes wild. "Love showing them you're mine. You've got a show to finish, love. Go kill it."
///
Ahh! So much fun! This has been such a joy to write and I appreciate you taking the time to give it a chance! It’s my first (of hopefully many) Harry fics - reading all of the stories here has been immensely inspiring, and I’m so looking forward to writing more!
Tagging my love @morganlatte​ who is a wonderful hype woman and beta reader. Thanks buddy!
Anyways! Thank you for reading! My love language is words of affirmation (aka I have a praise kink) so leave me a comment here if you feel so inclined!
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scribblingfangirl · 4 years ago
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WITH LOVE, THE GOSTS | Julie and The Phantoms - Part Three
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Author’s Note: I decided that this fic trilogy occurs a year after the season one final, making Julie and Y/N almost (or already) 17. Also… this part turned out waaay longer than expected. Which is why there is going to be a fourth part because I have one last idea but didn’t want to rush to write it. And to think this all started because of a rushed (haha) 1k Oneshot. I should really start to write more spontaneously, it seems like good things come out of it. Anyway, Enjoy! :D
Songs mentioned in this chapter (in this order): Now or Never & Wake Up by JaTP | Don't Stop Me Now by Queen | Rude by MAGIC! | Don’t Laugh At Me by Mark Wills | Don’t You Worry ’Bout a Thing by Tori Kelly | Still Learning by Halsey | Ayo Technology by 50 Cent | My version of My Name Is Luke by Trevor Wilson | Let’s Forget About It by Lisa Loeb | Let's Just Get Naked Lyrics by Joan Osborne | Hey by Pixies
word count: ~ 3.9k
summary: Even after meeting the boys they still aren’t tired of helping you out and they each have their own little ways to do it.
warnings:  // (english is not my first language, not beta-read)
| PART ONE | PART TWO |
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Knowing that ghosts existed was an absurd feeling (even though you had always believed or hoped that there was more out there than just this world, especially with all those planets that had been discovered by NASA), but knowing that there were three certain ghosts that liked you enough to kindly haunt you, well… that was just plain unimaginable somehow. Yet, still less anxiety awakening than you expected. 
After Julie let you meet the guys for the first time you thought you were prepared to accept that you would not be able to talk to them unless they played something (after all, you had Flynn to groan about that), but the occasional giggle from Julie and her glances into nothing still sent chills down your spine.
So you started to always look around very suspiciously whenever you were over at her house and make obscene hand movements just to be sure that the boys would move before you walked somewhere or sat down (which just earned chuckles from Flynn and annoyed sighs from Julie - “Just because you can’t see them, doesn’t mean they can’t see you. They know where you are, so please stop, or else my dad will call your parents and send you to Dr Turner as well.” The boys found it hilarious and liked to imitate you whenever they came too close to you.) 
The boys also still kept doing little things for you, just not so in secret anymore (though… Reggie was never one for subtlety). Whenever you seemed to have had a bad day (or whenever they just wanted to make you smile) you knew you could count on them having something prepared for you. 
You soon discovered that anything related to food (which sometimes were extremely odd and bizarre combinations) was Luke’s doing (except for pizza and meatballs, according to Julie that was always Reggie). And you knew it was Alex whenever it was something more calm and soothing, yet sometimes a little bit clumsy. And whenever it was blatantly obvious and/or slightly weird (in a good way!) it was Reggie. 
Well, no. Not always in a good way. One time you came back from school and your whole room was filled with glitter and butterflies and a small note with a little ‘Sorry!’ on it was pinned to your desk - cleaning that had been a pain in the a-. But you couldn’t be angry at Reggie, even though you weren’t quite sure what his ultimate goal would have been. 
Speaking of REGGIE...
All those helpful little deeds and nice gestures were always done within the limits of your house (mostly room) or Julie’s house and the studio, which is why you almost let out a loud yelp when suddenly during a math test your pen started to move on his own, filling out the empty space (because yes, you hadn’t been doing very much other than staring helplessly at the paper in front of you). Quickly you grabbed the pen as well (loosely and while trying to ignore the fact that you were practically holding hands with one of the guys) so that nobody would see a floating pen as you did a few weeks ago at Christmas.
From the corners of your eyes, you saw Julie slightly move her head towards you, as if she was listening to you - or rather someone right beside or behind you. ‘Of course. I can’t see them, so the only way to help me is by physically grabbing the pen, but Julie can hear and see them, so they (whoever this is - because let’s be honest, none of the guys really looks like a math genius) only have to tell her the corrects solutions and how to get there. My money’s on Alex.’
You were kind of shocked, and weirdly proud when Julie came up to you after class and said: “Reggie’s not so questionable after all, huh?” (Though… you should’ve guessed it, you did say subtlety wasn’t Reggie’s strong suit.) So you just giggled and shook your head while leaving some of your books in your locker (alongside the fact that Reggie was probably almost (if not!) hugging you from behind - you shuddered at that thought, it’s not like you were already awkward around living boys your age, no need to add ghosts to that list!)
A week later you and Julie entered the studio with blank faces and hanging shoulders. Julie threw a weak little wave towards the piano and sighed while you threw the blankets and snacks you were holding carelessly on the ground and let yourself fall face-first onto the couch, not being able to hide your smile anymore.
“We got our math exams back… yes the one Reggie helped us with.”
You couldn’t see what Julie was doing, but you heard her gasp and whisper “No! Reggie…” after a while. Then she was standing beside you, nudging your shoulder and willing you to sit up, but you didn’t bulge, needing a few more seconds to wipe the smile off your face again.
Faking to disgruntledly accept defeat as Julie’s nudges got stronger (the couch was really comfortable, you totally understood Luke now) you sat up and looked at Julie. “Who’s going to tell them?” you said with a heavy voice and felt how the couch dipped beside you. Raising your eyebrows you quickly glanced to the side (obviously not seeing anybody or anything) and looked back at Julie questioningly. 
She nodded, telling you that it was indeed Reggie and gave you the okay to drop the bomb.
You sighed as you turned back around, facing the wall on the other side of the studio and hoped that Reggie would ignore the fact that you were probably talking to his ear or something. “So Reggie… the help you gave us on the math final? Well…,” you couldn’t keep your face straight any longer and jumped onto the couch, “WE ACED IT! I WOULD HUG YOU IF YOU WEREN’T MADE OUT OF CUTE AIR!” (Okay… maybe there was a little bit too much serotonin involved.)
Julie added smiling, “And I’m happy to announce that due to my good grades my father allowed Julie and The Phantoms to play at the upcoming Summer Music Festival!”
A guitar riff filled the studio, followed by a short drum intro and with a ‘puff!’ the boys appeared in front of you, beaming and glowing at the news. Reggie even threw a wink at you when you smiled back and said: “Thank you!”
Don't look down 'Cause we're still rising Up right now And even if we hit the ground We'll still fly Keep dreaming like we'll live forever But live it like it's now or never!
This allowed LUKE…
The music festival was an experience you would never forget. You were very happy Ray managed to persuade your parents to let you accompany Julie (sadly Flynn had no such luck). Not only did you turn 17 and the boys made sure to have the whole crowd sing ‘Happy Birthday’ to you (as soon as you were back home you would add an extra point to your to-do: ‘find out how to kill ghosts a second time’), but the boys rocked the stage and Julie stood up taller and shined brighter than ever before. 
Gone (yet not forgotten) were the painful shocks and the fear of never performing again and the serenity of the guys was visible. 
It was the last night of the music festival when Julie got the phone call from her father. He would come by to get her the next morning and they would drive directly to visit other family members and spend the rest of the summer holidays there. 
Of course, Julie was excited to see her cousins and aunts and uncles again, but she also felt bad to leave you to drive back alone (you had come with your car jam-packed with all the necessary equipment you needed and that wasn’t provided by the festival).
“Don’t worry! It’s only a four-hour drive! I’ve got good music, podcasts and audiobooks to keep me company and back home Flynn will be waiting. It sadly looks like I’m going to survive without you.” 
Early the next morning Julie and some newfound fans of Julie and The Phantoms helped you load the equipment into your car and you said goodbye to Julie. Expecting the boys to just directly puff back to Los Feliz you didn’t waste any time and entered your car, connected your phone with the stereo and started to blast your favourite Broadway musicals.
You must’ve been on the road for half an hour when suddenly the playlist stopped and ‘Wake Up’ started to play.
So wake that spirit, spirit!
Confused you scrunched up your nose and touched the touch screen displaying the music system, trying to change it back to your playlist. But instead, the music changed yet again.
(Don't stop me now) 'Cause I'm having a good time (Don't stop me now) Yes, I'm havin' a good time I don't want to stop at all
“What the hell?” you muttered, staring at your stereo for a quick second before focusing back on the road, “Why you always going crazy on me dude?”
Once again the music switched.
Why you gotta be so rude? Don't you know I'm human too?
It took you a hot minute to understand what was going on and then you couldn’t stop laughing. 
Don't laugh at me, don't call me names Don't get your pleasure from my pain
“Oh, I’m sorry,” you said mockingly, looking at the empty passenger seat, guessing that that’s where your invisible friend was sitting. “Your pain? I’m not the one who is able to puff wherever and whenever their heart desires and who sneaks up on innocent people.”
Silence. 
“For what it’s worth. I’m sorry. I really am. It’s not like you choose this life, you deserved better than this. But I’m really glad I was able to get to know you. I’m really thankful for the light and happiness you brought back into Julie’s life.”
Don't you worry 'bout a thing
But I'm still learnin' to
using technology
You laughed. “Impressive skills nevertheless. Knowing three fitting songs and then changing them at the right time? Let me guess, Luke? Because I don’t think all of you three would fit into my tiny car full of musical equipment.”
At first, there was no music yet again, but then the slow melody of a (for you) well-known song flooded your car. It was the one Trevor Wilson song you never understood until you met the boys, the one song that was so totally different to his usual rock sound (except for the refrains, which, as you later would find out, were parts of the original lyrics Luke wrote for his version of the song).
I sing to remember the stories that used to be But I don’t write to create what could have been And as I scream words into the darkness around me They come out like a dying whisper
The kindest thing to do is to silence them and let them die To unleash my heartfelt sorrow into the sky  And diminish the will to fight That pulses like fire and screams with pain through my veins
But life’s not always beautiful, it’s rare So I’mma chase it, watch you make it
Don’t need to introduce himself You will want to know his name Pushing your foundations down  He is here to stay
Don’t call him a breeze when he’s a hurricane Don’t call him a tremble when he’s an earthquake Don’t call him an inconvenience Please just say his name
Leaving lyrics in my hands That I swallow like pills Like hurtful words, they rip and claw And press painfully against my chest
But no matter how painful they are I will soak them up, thinking of our hopes and wishes And as each word pushes a new pulse through my veins I keep staring out on the grave of our shared space of mind
Life’s not always beautiful, but it’s rare So I’mma chase it, watch you make it
Don’t need to introduce himself You will want to know his name Pushing your foundations down  He is here to stay
Don’t call him a spark when he’s a lightning bolt Don’t call him a flicker when he’s a raging flame Don’t you dare to underestimate him Please just say his name
But even when the word flood finally comes to an end Fidgeting hands remind me of music never played
I owe him my voice I owe him my sound
So I give him this time I give him this space To sing it out loud To let him declare And let me be proud
What’s his name? (His name is Luke!) What’s his name? (His name is Luke!) What’s his name? (His name is Luke!)
How long do we say his name? (Until we explode!)
My name is Luke! (Tell your friends!)
Tears were rolling down your cheeks, the song now more emotional than ever before. You couldn’t imagine how this song must affect Luke. Thinking that his bandmate abandoned him (which honestly… he kind of did, only mentioning him in one song, not giving any money to their parents and so on) up until he heard the song for the first time.
“Luke…”
Forget about it Let's forget about it
The ensuing silence wasn’t awkward. You hummed along to the music Luke selected, sometimes it were old classics (probably his favourites), other times it seemed to be random newer hits he probably never heard before mixed with some songs from your favourite playlists.
It was nearing midday and your stomach made itself known. As if on cue a road sign hinted at a diner just up ahead. Setting the blinker you pulled into the parking lot a few moments later.
“I hope you don’t mind. I know home’s only like an hour away, but...” you began to trail off, not knowing where to look at and your stomach finished your sentence. And before you were able to grab the door handle it sprung wide open. 
“Uh, what a gentleman. Thank you very much.”
The meal was over in a flash and once more you realised how much the boys actually knew about you without having actually interacted with you (perks of seeing other people without being seen themselves?). 
It’s like Luke could read your wishes just from your facial expressions. Whenever you needed salt or pepper they were right there. Whenever something was too salty or had too much pepper on your drink was being pushed closer to your side. And when you accidentally spilt something and needed more napkins they magically appeared.
When you then spotted a cute little guitar keychain that reminded you of Luke that was being sold as a souvenir at the check-out it was suddenly safely tucked into your back pocket (though that was really really risky, and while you did not condone it you couldn’t really stop a ghost).
Back in your car, you didn’t even bother to turn on the stereo, knowing that Luke would take over as soon as your hands were on the steering wheel again. 
However, a glance to your right presented you with a map of your surroundings, a big x hastily drawn over the Silverwood Lake in San Bernardino, which was basically just around the corner.
“You want to go swimming? We- I just ate! And my bathing suit is somewhere under that mountain of equipment on the backseat.”
Let's just get naked, just for a laugh Let's just get naked It's a trip and a half
You laughed at that, rolling your eyes and shaking your head, before stowing the map away and turning on the car. “I guess catching Reggie in the shower isn’t enough anymore?”
Hey!
“You started making it weird buddy.”
It had started to rain when you finally pulled up in your driveway, but you couldn’t be bothered to rush inside, enjoying the feeling of the cooling wetness on your skin.
“Look at that,” you said to nobody in particular, not knowing if Luke was still around or if he puffed back to the garage, “I didn’t even need to go swimming after all.”
He was. Sitting in the passenger seat, face on his arms while he leaned on the open car window, he watched you dance in the rain with a smile on his face. He was glad he decided to stick around and keep you company on that road trip. You gave him the courage to listen to My Name Is Luke for the first time (and getting to see you smile while showing off his impressive music knowledge was a bonus too). Because without knowing, you were doing little deeds for the boys too.
And made ALEX…
Whoever wrote that “Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It's about learning how to dance in the rain”-quote totally forgot to mention how dangerous small summer storms can be. 
Well sure, it might have been your fault for staying out for too long and deciding to let the sun that came out a little bit later dry you instead of changing into fresh and dry clothes, but whatever happened happened and you got sick. (It’s not like you had anything better to do during the last few days of your summer holidays, right?) 
Flynn had been a great friend and hung out almost daily at your house, playing board games, watching movies or tv or even just discussing upcoming Julie and The Phantoms possibilities with you. But your dearest little helper had been Alex.
The blond drummer had turned into the tall brother you never had but always wanted (focus on tall because the age thing with ghosts is seriously confusing) even if he was invisible to you 100% of the time. You had the same interests and were able to bond without actually having to say any words, little gestures and reciprocations on your side were more than enough.
Julie had come up with an easy solution and had bought you some of those sound buzzers (like the ones that dogs and cats use to communicate with their owners) and recorded some simple words and phrases the boys liked to use on them. Now the boys just had to press them to be able to communicate with you without having to use pen and paper or Julie herself (sure your parents were a little bit weary and confused, but you said it was for a longer school research project and that shut them up).
Now, feeling way better than during the last few days, but still very tired, you were sitting in your bed, not really focused on the tv show (or was it a movie?) that was playing on your computer. You had been contemplating and mentally preparing yourself to get something to eat and to drink for the past 15 minutes, but the thoughts alone were exhausting and binding you to the bed. Just then a tray with a water bottle, meds and a fruit bowl floated into your room. 
Suddenly wide awake and full of energy you clumsily jumped out of your bed and grabbed the tray, throwing a quick glance out of the door to see if your parents were around and slammed the door shut, wincing at the loud sound and hoping that Alex had walked out of the way (not that it would have hurt him, but you know - rude).
“Rude.” 
See? He thought the same. (Julie had to specifically add this word for Alex.) 
“I know, I know. I’m sorry. But I would like not to get murdered or have Sam and Dean Winchester on my back because my parents think I’m possessed and need to be exorcised.”
“Me.”
“You what?”
“Me.”
“Alex… I need more context.”
“I do. Me.”
You just blinked blankly at the sound buzzers, trying to piece together what Alex was trying to say.
“Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. Me. M-”
“THAT’S ENOUGH Y/N! WHATEVER THAT SCHOOL PROJECT IS, TELL IT I HEARD IT AND I DON’T CARE WHAT IT WANTS!” you heard your father's scream come muffled through the door.
The audience laughter from sitcoms filled your room and you groaned, grabbing a pillow and smashing it against your face.
Faintly you heard the telltale sound of a pen scribbling something on paper and when you peeked from behind the pillow a note was floating in the air in front of you. “You mean exorcise ME! You would be the one surviving!” 
“What? Oh my god… yeah okay, YOU get exorcised… same thing. Both aren’t allowed to happen. Forgive my fever brain.”
“No.”
“Fork you, Alex.”
“No.”
“I have Carlos on speed-dial, I’m sure he already came up with other methods to get rid of ghosts other than the salt thing. He already told me that he’s sorry and that he thinks I might get haunted by you too with the amount of time I spend at their house.” 
“No. Food.”
Confused at that topic change it took you a few seconds to answer. “What?” Looking around your gaze landed on the tray that you had deposited on your desk. “Oh right! Boy, I completely forgot how thirsty and hungry I am. Did I say thank you? Fang u!” you mumbled with your mouth full of fruit. 
“No. Food.”
You swallowed down your food and took a big gulp of water. “Yes Alex, thank you. I am eating. You see? Here I am, here’s the food. The food is here and now whoops - ifs gan!”
You could basically feel the annoyance radiating from the ghost and weren’t really shocked when the pen started to scribble something down again.
“No! Argh!” He really wrote Argh… that dork really wrote Argh! “You can be worse than Reggie sometimes, but you do it on purpose and I’m just sorry for Reggie. A) Carlos thinks he got rid of us by making a french dip and B) You’re awfully lively for a supposedly sick person. I might need to use the buzzers more and see what other reactions I can provoke from your parents.”
Crumbling the note in your hands you thought ‘Challenge accepted’. “You know what? I think I’mma go back on Reggie’s offer and actually let him introduce me to Wilbur. He might know some stuff I could use to blackmail you. And you’re right! I feel much better, just very tired, but that’s nothing a little bit of fresh air can’t fix! Toodles!” 
You left your room, leaving a flabbergasted ghost behind who had lost his snapback with the number of times he had been combing through his hair with his hands. And while angrily pressing a pink buzzer, the buzzer wasn't the only thing that screamed “WILLIAM!” after the girl. (That was another important sound Alex wanted to have recorded.)
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gukyi · 5 years ago
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good luck charm | kth
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summary: kim taehyung has nearly everything he’s ever dreamed of: an apartment in new york city, a lead role in an off-broadway play, and a best friend to share it with. but even still, there’s one thing missing—love. and when he goes on the hunt for it, he dots every i and crosses every t, leaves no stone unturned, but forgets to look at the person who could ever love him the most: you.
{friends to lovers!au, roommates!au, actor!au}
pairing: kim taehyung x female reader genre: fluff, angst, unrequited love word count: 11k a/n: a huge thank you to MK for commissioning me for this piece–i hope it’s everything you dreamed of!!!! these are tough times, but i hope this can serve as a distraction to everyone!! please stay safe and wash your hands! if you’re interested in commissioning me, check out this post! also, if the pictures are unclear, click on them for higher resolution!
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“Well, if it isn’t my favorite customer.”
You see a tuft of purple hair sticking out behind a basket of orange pansies, two nimble hands with long fingers fiddling with the stems. 
“I bet you say that to everyone,” you tease, as Namjoon peers out from where he’s hiding behind a shelf of flowers, greeting you with the same warm grin he always wears. 
Namjoon pauses, gaze tilting upwards as he corrects himself, “my favorite customer who’s about to confess to her best friend of four years with a bouquet arranged by yours truly?”
You roll your eyes, thankful that there’s nobody else inside this little flower shop. Not that you seem to have an issue exposing your entire life story to certain strangers, especially if they’ve got dimples and colored hair to match. Namjoon has always been something of an exception—perhaps he is one of the closest friends you have here in the city, where everything moves so quickly you barely have time to say hello to a new acquaintance. Namjoon and his flower shop are a respite, a safe haven in a bustling world, where time always seems to move slower than it does outside. 
“Don’t remind me, I’m sweating just thinking about it,” you tell him, trying to cover your nervousness with a laugh. 
“Ah, well how could I forget, when you came to me to arrange the perfect bouquet for tonight?” Namjoon says. He chops a wilting flower from its stem and places it behind his ear. Even though it’s a little sadder, a little less lively than its comrades, the bright yellow of the primrose complements his hair nicely, making him look even more ethereal, magical, than he already does. 
“Who else would I ask besides the best bouquet-maker in town?” You ask as Namjoon leads you to the counter, where various bouquets have been laid out in vases, ready for pick-up. It’s a secret garden here, all green and fresh and calm, a sharp contrast to the industrial machine outside. 
Namjoon heads to the back, a room behind a little wooden door that’s the slightest bit too short for him, so he has to bend down to avoid hitting his head (he still hits his head rather frequently, though), as you breathe in the scents of the flowers surrounding you, the roses and the daisies and everything in between. It’s not much, but it does calm the thick beating of your heart ever so slightly, and that’s enough. 
He emerges a minute or so later, banging his head on the way out. In his hands is one of the biggest bouquets you’ve ever laid eyes on, thick with some flowers you recognize but more you don’t. It’s breathtaking and gorgeous and impressive, all at once. 
“Namjoon, you know that I didn’t ask for this many flowers,” you chide as he plops the bouquet down onto the counter, clicking away at the ancient cash register to his left. 
“Consider it a good luck gift,” Namjoon tells you with a wink. 
You sigh, pulling out your card to pay him. “I could use all of the luck I could get.” The likelihood of tonight going more right than wrong is miniscule. But what else can you do, besides try? “What do they all mean?”
“Well, the daffodils represent honesty and truth. The red carnations mean love, obviously. So do the chrysanthemums. The baby’s breath is just for decoration, but it also means everlasting love. The gardenias are for secret love. And the freesia is just because I thought it went well with the bouquet,” Namjoon says expertly, pointing to each one as he tells you what it means. “I don’t know if Taehyung’s super up with his flower meanings, but I think that even the gesture will say more than enough. But if he is, this is just a bonus.”
“I feel like it’s going to go really badly, is that wrong?” You say, the nerves overtaking you. You were hoping to just act calm and collected, thank Namjoon for the bouquet and be on with your lives, but even you can’t help but seek advice from him. 
Namjoon lets out a laugh. “If you think it’s going to go so badly, why have you planned so much?” He poses. “It’s normal to be nervous about this sort of thing—what if I mess up, what if he doesn’t feel the same way, what if he rejects me—but I think that, deep down inside of you, there’s a part that thinks that it will all be worth it. And I don’t know, maybe I’m just a sucker for happy endings, but I think that that’s the most important. The part of you that doesn’t want to spend the rest of its life thinking about what might have been.” Namjoon’s phone lights up next to him, his lockscreen a picture of him and another boy, shorter, but with the same dyed hair. The two look so happy together. He gazes down at it, exhales, and shuts his phone off. “Just my two cents.”
“You’re wise beyond your years, Kim Namjoon,” you tell him with a smile. Maybe you are nervous about the what ifs, nervous that this whole thing could blow up in your face, but is it so naive of you to listen to that whisper in your heart? The one that says, maybe he feels the same? “I wish you’d take your own advice, sometimes.”
“It’s different,” Namjoon murmurs to himself. “He and I… this is all we’ll ever be.”
“You don’t know unless you try,” you tell him. You know the feeling. Perhaps, if tonight goes well, it will encourage him to give it a shot himself. “You never know.” Namjoon looks up at you, smile wide but eyes sad. There’s clearly something more that he isn’t mentioning, but you won’t push it. You get it. How could you not? “What if he does feel the same?”
The bell above the door rings on your way out, fingers clenching onto a bouquet, praying and wishing and dreaming that maybe this will all be worth it, in the end.
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Something is up with Kim Taehyung. 
When you return to your apartment, Kim Taehyung is slouched on your dinky loveseat, arm deep inside a six-month-old box of Frosted Flakes, as an episode of Jeopardy! plays on his laptop, his eyes empty and glazed over as he stares at Alex Trebek, wordless.
You nearly jump in shock, terrified that he’ll spot you and the enormous bouquet in your hands, terrified that he’ll ask you about it, terrified that your entire plan for tonight will get flushed down the toilet the moment you and him lock eyes. But it doesn’t, because Kim Taehyung doesn’t even acknowledge you when you walk in, for better or for worse, and you manage to stash the bouquet into a vase in your bedroom before rounding on your roommate, because something is up with Kim Taehyung. 
Kim Taehyung hates Frosted Flakes. The only reason they’re in your apartment to begin with is because Jungkook had brought them over one time when he was visiting, and even then they were stale. Now they’re extra stale. So stale that they make a hollow sound on your countertop when you tap them against the laminate. 
Kim Taehyung normally shuffles through Jeopardy! like it’s nobody’s business. He gets at least a quarter, if not half of the questions correct, and always earns more points than you. But he doesn’t even open his mouth when Alex Trebek says, “This Renaissance artist left Florence to serve as principal engineer for the Duke of Milan’s army” and you know that he knows it’s Leonardo Da Vinci. 
Kim Taehyung normally has plenty to say, especially to Sawyer the Suspicious Floor Dip, who currently resides in your living room. Sawyer the Suspicious Floor Dip has been your honorary second roommate ever since the two of you moved into this apartment four months ago. Taehyung made him a little museum placard that is framed and hanging on the wall above him, and he has an account on every social media website under the sun. Sawyer the Suspicious Floor Dip has more followers on Instagram than you do. But today, both he and Sawyer are silent and unmoving. 
“Tae?” You ask, treading over to the couch as he empties the box of Frosted Flakes into his stomach, finishing up the episode. “Is everything alright?”
“Mmrph,” he mumbles in response. You suppose that means he said fine, which means that no, everything is not alright. 
“What’s going on? You’re normally really excited the day of your shows,” you ask. At least he hasn’t entirely turned into a soulless hermit, and he moves his legs off of the couch so you can sit beside him. “Is something wrong?”
“No,” Taehyung says, louder. “I don’t know. I feel like it’s going to go really badly, is that wrong?”
You smile softly, shaking your head as you reach a hand out, letting it rest in his lap before he takes your hand in his. “No, it’s not. Tonight’s a big deal, isn’t it? You must be under a lot of pressure to do well.”
“I’m just so worried that I’ll fuck it up and everyone will hate me forever,” Taehyung says, exasperated. It’s almost as if he’s tired with himself for being so negative. 
“You’re not gonna fuck it up and nobody is going to hate you. I’ll always love you, you know that,” you assure him. 
“Yeah, I know,” Taehyung says, but the worst part is that you’re not sure if he really does. 
“It’s okay to be nervous, and to worry. Tonight is really important. But you’re an incredible actor, and you’ve always been so good at what you do,” you tell him, thumb rubbing against the back of his hand softly. “I can’t tell you how proud I am of you.”
Taehyung lets his head rest on your own and the two of you sit together on the couch in silence, watching as the minutes on his laptop clock tick by. You can hear his heartbeat, steady and soft, firm underneath his chest. You wonder if he can hear yours. Hear how it’s picking up speed, hear how it beats only for him. 
“You always know what to say,” Taehyung tells you. “I wish I knew how to do that.”
You grin sadly to yourself, happy that the two of you are side by side so he doesn’t have to see your face. How could Taehyung tell you something like that? How could he, when every time you’re near him, you’re speechless?
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You never really considered yourself to be a theater person when you were younger. You would fall asleep when you went to see plays with your parents or on a school field trip. You never made an effort to go see the performances that your school put on. You were one-hundred percent confident that you would go through all four years of university without seeing one of the fifteen different theater groups’ shows, not because you hated them, but because they never crossed your mind in the first place. 
And then, you met Kim Taehyung. 
You met Kim Taehyung halfway through your freshman year because the two of you were in the same Cinematography in the 1900’s class. And then, suddenly, you were eating the same shitty food in the dining hall after class ended at seven in the evening. And then, suddenly, you were studying together, spending nights watching Jeopardy! on his laptop when you didn’t feel like doing any work. And then, suddenly, Kim Taehyung mentioned in passing one day that he had a show that Friday, and would you like to come, it would really mean a lot to him, he thinks you’ll really like it. 
And then, suddenly, you were a theater person. 
That night was the first night Kim Taehyung had ever taken your breath away. And every performance, every night, every fucking moment after that, he never stopped.
Tonight is no exception. You can’t say that you’re super well-versed in theater fame and its technicalities, but you think that this may just be Taehyung’s best performance yet. Here, in this theater off of Sixth Avenue, to a crowd of two, perhaps three hundred people, Taehyung is nothing short of amazing. He never is. From the moment he steps on stage in a raggedy old flannel and jeans, eyes wide with dreams, he reels you in and makes sure that you won’t leave this theater, won’t leave here unscathed. But the fatal blow is halfway through, when he finally spots you in the third row, sees you staring up at him in wonder, and he smiles. 
There is so much that you wish you could tell him. 
After the show, you race back to your apartment, desperate to finish up the last of the preparations before he arrives, after taking off all of his makeup and his costumes, saying goodbye to all of his co-stars. Normally, you’d hang around, let him introduce you, but tonight is different. Special. 
[September 8th, 9:35PM]
You: Had to go home bc I’m planning a special something for the star of the night! Sorry I missed all of the fun afterwards You: Something very important to tell you
Taehyung: ohoho Taehyung: I wonder who that could be Taehyung: Coming soon. I have something to tell you too! ^^
You stare at the text as you grab the vase of flowers from your room, setting it up at your very unimpressive kitchen table. What could Taehyung possibly have to tell you? Other than perhaps a thanks for showing up (as if you weren’t going to). 
What if, that voice whispers. The part deep in your heart, the one that you wish would shut up sometimes. 
“No,” you say aloud, perhaps more for yourself than anyone else. “No. I have something to tell him. I have to tell him this.”
You never know, she says. He might. What are you waiting for?
You pull out all of the scented candles in the apartment, setting them up on the coffee table and on the windowsills. There’s a plate of macarons that you had purchased from the fancy bakery in Midtown sitting by the vase, a little treat for the two of you since your diets usually consist of premade Costco pasta and takeout. 
There is so much you want to tell him. So much to say, and no way to do it. It seems impossible. As the minutes tick by, as he gets closer and closer, you wonder if you even have the courage to open your mouth. It’s not as if this is life-changing news. It would be so easy, so easy to just pretend that this is nothing but a celebration of Taehyung’s very first major off-Broadway show, to push down the ache in your heart and tell that voice to stay quiet, if only for a little longer. You’ve lived like this for so long already. Who’s to say you can’t live like this forever?
Taehyung comes home as you’re flicking through late-night television show reruns and fiddling with a Rubix cube, anything to keep your mind occupied and your fingers busy. You hear as he fumbles with the lock—his key has always been a little bit off—and scramble to get everything ready, shutting your laptop and putting the Rubix cube on your designated Weird Stuff Shelf. The apartment smells like a hodgepodge of vanilla, flowers, cinnamon, and champagne, and the flowers are already starting to wilt slightly. But it’s now or never, really. 
Taehyung swings the door open with a grin and gasps in excitement when he sees you, standing in the hazy, flickering yellow light of the kitchen, surrounded by candles, with a plate of macarons and a vase of flowers on the table. 
“Oh my God!” He says, overjoyed, high off of the adrenaline from a successful show, eyes still sparking from the spotlight. “Y/N! What is all of this?”
“Just a little something from me to you,” you say awkwardly. You have no idea how to tell him. You’re not sure if you even will. “To celebrate.”
“Dare I say, this apartment has never looked better,” he tells you, beaming. He walks over to where you’re hovering by the kitchen table, knee deep in it all, admiring the sight before him. He leans over you, ever so slightly, as he takes in the scent of the flowers, the macarons sitting before him. And then he turns to you, the glow from the candles making his eyes warm and caramel-y, almost as if they’re shimmering in the light, and he says, “You did all of this for me?”
“Of course,” you tell him, because you would do this again and again if it means you could see him like this. If you could watch him burst through the front door for the rest of your goddamn life, watch as he comes home to you. “Tonight’s special.”
“It wouldn’t be without you,” he tells you honestly, candidly. He tells you that because he means it. You wish you could say the same things to him. “You’re my best friend, Y/N.”
It’s now or never. If he takes one step closer, turns to look at you one more time, you don’t know if you’ll still have the courage. You don’t know if you even have it right now, but tomorrow, when you wake up, you don’t want to regret this night. You don’t want to wonder what if, what might have been. You’ve been friends for so long. Who’s to say you can’t be more than that?
“I have something to tell you,” you breathe out, words heavy on your tongue. You can feel your heart seize up, almost like it’s holding its breath with you. 
“Right, you said that,” Taehyung says with a nod, stuffing a cherry macaron into his mouth. “I have something to tell you, too.”
“Do you want to go first?” You ask him. You just need a little more time. You just want to hear his voice once more. 
“Okay,” Taehyung says happily. “I got a girlfriend!” 
Oh. 
Oh. 
Well. 
Okay. 
“Really?” You ask, trying to make it sound more like a Really? That’s great! and not a Really? I thought that we had something special. You don’t think that you’re doing a very good job.
“Yeah!” Taehyung says. He’s ecstatic. It tears your heart in two. “I mean, I know I’m just… a super, hopeless romantic and I fall in love with people when they hold the door open for me, but I’m really happy with her. It’s Ariel, actually, she played Lucy! Isn’t it funny how even though our characters never even officially met, we still found something there?”
“Yeah,” you say, emotionless. Taehyung is far too excited, far too joyous to notice. 
“I just—I wanted to tell you, because you’re my best friend and you deserve to know,” he says, breaking off half of the raspberry macaron and holding it out to you. “What did you want to tell me? Did you say it was important?”
“Oh, uh…” you fumble, shaking your head at the macaron. Your stomach has never felt smaller. It’s like there’s nothing left to say to him. “I think I’m getting transferred to another office.” It’s not news. Your job told you that last week. But it’s something, and it’s better than being honest. Anything is, at this point. “They might pay a little more.”
“Yay!” Taehyung says. “That’s great! Now, maybe we can fix up the lights in the kitchen. So they don’t read horror movie every time I try to make pasta at 2AM. I’m happy for you, you deserve it!”
You smile, putting on a brave face, just for him. “Me too.” You can’t muster up the strength to say anything else. 
Taehyung spends the rest of the night gobbling down the macarons and telling you all about Ariel, as you try desperately to tune him out. Even the sound of your own thoughts would be better than this. Anything. Anything. Eventually, after it’s long past midnight and Taehyung realizes he’ll need his sleep for the show tomorrow night, he bids you goodbye and sets off to his room, a bounce in his step.
You stand in the middle of your apartment. Even though it’s small, and even though you have him, it’s never felt emptier.
Namjoon always says that flowers don’t just need food and water to stay happy. They need love, they need to be surrounded by happiness. He says that they can feel it, that they react to it. That’s why he always tries to be happy when he’s working. Because he hates seeing the flowers so sad. He says they remind him of himself.
It’s no wonder why the flowers in the vase look even more wilted than before.
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Here’s the thing: You had pretty much always known that it was going to hurt like this. There had always been that part of you, deep down inside, that knew that there was no way it wasn’t going to hurt like this. That knew that there was nothing you could do to stop it from hurting like this. 
And still, foolishly so, you allowed yourself to believe that maybe, just maybe, telling him would make it stop. You gave into this fantasy that, even if he didn’t feel the same, even if he let you down easy, even if he told you that he just wanted to be friends, it would be better. 
That’s the worst part of it all, really. The fact that you never even told him. Couldn’t. Wouldn’t. Didn’t. You never told him, and now, somehow, everything is even worse than before. 
The flowers have long been thrown out by now, tossed out after hardly a week, unable to stand the tension in the air, the emptiness that lingered far beyond that night. Still, you remembered to keep one, plucking it from the vase before it died of secondary sadness. Because even if they hurt you, even if they tear at your heartstrings one by one, you’ve always had this terrible habit of never letting go of what you love. You pressed the flower with an old college textbook, placed it into a thin little vase, meant for one flower only. A red carnation, to remind you of what you could have had. What might have been. 
Kim Taehyung is significantly less worried this time around as he prepares for the opening night of his latest play. He wakes up early and does some yoga in the living room, pushing all of the furniture to the walls so he has enough space to Downward Dog in peace. He watches a couple episodes of Jeopardy! as he eats the Pad Thai he Doordashed to your apartment, and gets half of the questions correct. Even from your bedroom, you can hear him talking to Sawyer. 
“I’m excited for tonight, Sawyer,” he says to him. “I don’t know, last time I did Shakespeare was sophomore year in college, I think? I was Mercutio. It was fun and I got to use a sword. Y/N came to that show, too. I annoyed her so much that night that she told me that she was glad Tybalt killed me, but we had a good time anyway.”
Sawyer doesn’t say anything back, because he is a Suspicious Floor Dip in your living room. But it’s so lovely to hear Taehyung’s voice again. 
“Do you think that Y/N’s been acting weird, lately?” Taehyung asks. “I just feel like—I feel like she and I aren’t as close these days. She works in her room a lot more and some days I don’t see her at all. Which is crazy, because we live together. My ex always said it was a little weird how I lived with my best friend who is also a girl. But I don’t think it is. Do you think I did something wrong?”
No, you wish you could say, leaning against your thin bedroom door as you hear Taehyung wonder aloud. Never, in a million years. It was me, you want to tell him. I got my hopes up and now I’m paying the price. It’s not you. It’s never you. 
“Yeah, I guess she’s just busier these days,” Taehyung says with a sigh. “She did get transferred to that new office a couple of months ago. But she’s still my best friend. I’ll never stop telling her that—she deserves to know that no matter what, she always has me.”
“Sawyer the Suspicious Floor Therapist, huh?” You interrupt, finally getting the nerve to open your door. Taehyung’s on his way out, all dressed, backpack on his shoulder. He has to be at the theater a few hours before the show begins, anyway. 
“He’s just so easy to talk to,” Taehyung jokes. “Did you… uh… did you hear that?”
“The part about being your best friend?” You ask with an eyebrow raise, making Taehyung smile. You don’t mention the other things you heard. You don’t think that would make things better. 
(You’re not sure what will, at this point. Telling him is off the table. You distantly wonder if it was ever on the table to begin with.)
“Just making sure you knew,” Taehyung says with a grin. “Don’t want you forgetting about that.”
“How could I?” You muse, and it makes him smile something fierce and makes you wish that things were different. 
“You’re coming tonight, right?” Taehyung says. He must know the answer, already. 
“Of course I am,” you tell him. “Who do you take me for?”
“I’ll look for you in the crowd, okay?” Taehyung says, a hand on the doorknob as he gets ready to leave. “Keep an eye out for me. Promise?”
It’s always been so hard to say no to him. 
“Promise,” you tell him. 
That night, you sit a little further back, shadowed by the mezzanine above you, but Taehyung finds you anyway. As he schmoozes his way through the storyline on stage, he sends a wink your way, a couple of the girls in the row in front of you giggling to each other when he does. You sort of wish he was really winking at them. That way, it would hurt a little less. 
Afterwards, you linger around in the lobby, waiting for him like you always have, like you always do, like you always will. You don’t have anything special waiting for him back at your apartment. There’s nothing left to tell him. 
You spot his head of soft, wavy brown hair far before he spots you, can make it out in a sea of cast members as they cheer for themselves, celebrating another successful opening show. Your face lights up when you see him, when you see that he sees you. This is how it has always been. This is how it should be—you find each other in the crowd, grinning as you congratulate him, as he introduces you to his cast members and then invites you to the afterparty. You spend the night together, high off of the adrenaline and just a little tipsy, before stumbling back to your apartment, basking in the afterglow. 
You want nothing more than for things to go back to the way they were. 
And then, you see her. 
“Y/N!” Taehyung shouts excitedly, and it takes all of your strength to not let your face fall as she comes into view, hand interlaced with Taehyung’s. “I knew you’d be here!”
“How could I not be?” You say, letting Taehyung wrap you in a one-armed hug rather than two. “You know me.”
“This is my girlfriend,” Taehyung introduces proudly, motioning to the pretty girl beside him as she waves at you good-naturedly. “Madison, this is my roommate and college best friend, Y/N.”
“Taehyung talks about you non-stop,” Madison says with a smile. “It’s nice to finally meet you.”
“All good things, I hope,” you say, because what else are you supposed to say to the love of your life’s new girlfriend? How else can you salvage this conversation when you already see it going terribly? “You both were really good tonight. I’m happy that I came.”
“Me too!” Taehyung grins. “Did you see me wink at you? I promised you I would.”
You nod, eyes desperately scanning the rest of the room, the rest of the people, the floor, anything to keep from watching as Madison drapes herself over Taehyung, intertwines their hands as she leans against him, like she can’t get enough of him. 
“Hey, do you want to come to the afterparty? It’s at Alex’s house, apparently he has this brownstone in Brooklyn all to himself, I’ve heard it’s gorgeous—”
“No, actually, I have a lot of work that I need to catch up on,” you interrupt. You don’t think you’d last five minutes there, where the only person you know is Taehyung, where he’s got a girlfriend on his arm the entire time. You aren’t even sure how you’re faring now, if you’re even  breathing, standing before him and his equally-gorgeous new partner. 
You just wish everything could go back to normal.
Taehyung’s brows furrow, disappointed. “Oh, you do? But—”
“Yeah, I’m just—I’m really sorry, Tae, you know I want to. But I should get going. It was really nice meeting you, Madison, I hope we can see each other again sometime—” You spew out a few more goodbyes and even more apologies as you rush towards the exit, turning away so you don’t have to see Taehyung calling after you. 
On the way back, you bump into Namjoon, who’s closing up shop for the day. He looks positively exhausted, always working diligently from morning to far past sunset every day, but he smiles when he sees you, setting aside his tired eyes to say hello. 
“Hey, Y/N, fancy seeing you here,” he greets. “How are you? How’d it go?” He gives you a sort of grin that means that he thinks it went super well. 
“Not great,” you tell him truthfully, because it’s late and you don’t feel like hiding things anymore. 
“Oh,” Namjoon says. He opens his mouth to say something else, but you can see the hesitation in his eyes, the way he thinks that none of the things he has to say will go down very well. You know the feeling. “I’m sorry to hear that.”
“It’s alright,” you assure him, even though it’s not. “It’s not that big of a deal.”
“Isn’t it, though?” Namjoon asks solemnly. 
You frown. “Do you really think we should both be having this conversation?” Namjoon has his own secrets, his dreams of a short boy with colored hair by his side. “You aren’t much better.”
“No, I’m not,” he muses to himself. “But it is a big deal, Y/N. Please don’t act like it isn’t. You love him, don’t you? Even if he doesn’t love you back.”
You love him. 
It’s not a secret anymore. 
You love him like the stars love the moon, surrounding her in their light, making sure she never gets lonely. You love him like an old Hollywood movie, film faded and worn, getting played once in a while to make sure you never forget where you started. You love him like a flower, carnations, daffodils, chrysanthemums, perking up when you’re around him and wilting when you’re not. 
“It doesn’t matter,” you say with a sigh. Certainly, there are more important things to dwell on. You’re looking for a new job because being an office temp isn’t exactly what you were envisioning for your life. You want to start fixing up the bathroom, because the grout by the shower is starting to disintegrate. Sawyer the Suspicious Floor Dip is a fire hazard. “I’m okay with just being friends.”
Namjoon smiles, and it’s so sad, but not with pity. It’s sad with I know, and sad with feeling, because he gets it, and that must be why you’re here, standing on the sidewalk at ten on a Friday night, underneath the street lamps as the city begins to open its eyes. “But when you have him the way you do, how can you be okay with any of it?”
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Taehyung comes home late that night, and you only know because you’re running to the bathroom at the same time he fumbles with the door. He takes longer than usual, which means he’s drunk, and you can only hope and pray that he’s alone. You watch as he finally manages to unlock the door, stumbling inside, managing to turn on the main overhead lights in your apartment as he does. From where you’re peering at him from the darkness of the hallway, you can make out dark red, purple spots all along his skin. 
You pull the bathroom door almost shut, leaving it a little ajar so you can gaze out at him, watch as he pours himself a glass of water and downs the entire thing before he makes his way to the hallway, heading for his bedroom. From here, you see the way his hair is mussed, all fucked up from someone’s hands in it, see the marks up close, the way they line his neck, his jaw, his collarbones. He finds his way to his bedroom and shuts the door behind him as you stand, trapped in the bathroom, mad at him for not knowing but furious at yourself for being so ridiculous.
Love was never supposed to hurt like this. 
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The next time that you attend one of Taehyung’s opening nights, you don’t stick around long afterwards. 
You were planning on it, of course, like you always do, because ever since college you’ve made a point to see him after a show, tell him all of the things you wish you could say to him all of the time, you were amazing, you were brilliant, you were perfect in every way. You even have a small bouquet of flowers in your hands, arranged by none other than Namjoon—a pity bouquet, an I hope that you two can still be friends bouquet—ready to give to him, ready to see them sitting on your kitchen table as a reminder. 
And then, you see the way he kisses her, overcome with joy, running on that post-show high. You see the way he pulls her into him and plants one on her, arms wrapped around each other as they celebrate, in their own special way. 
Suddenly, the flowers feel like dead weight in your hands. 
You manage to catch one of the few co-stars of Taehyung’s that you recognize, one who was in Our Lives with him. His name is Seokjin, and he’s gorgeous. Broadway material. Emmy, Grammy, Oscar, Tony material. He stops to say hello to you, and you ask if he could give the bouquet to Taehyung, tell him it was from you. 
Seokjin’s nice. He doesn’t ask why, he just nods. It saves you the trouble of telling him. Nobody wants to listen to your sob story. He says goodbye to you, and that he hopes to see you again soon. You hope so too. 
You spend the night curled up in your room pretending that everything is fine. You don’t see Taehyung when he comes home, and you don’t see him the next day, either. 
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It’s not as if you’ve started to avoid Taehyung entirely. You live together—it would be downright impressive if you didn’t see each other for a whole day. It’s just, sometimes he still—
“Y/N? Wanna order Pad Thai?”
“Hey, Y/N, they’re playing The Devil Wears Prada on Freeform, do you want to come watch with me?”
“Central Park is having a Dog Festival, do you wanna go together?”
And sometimes, you just can’t. The thought of spending time with him makes your heart ache, whether it be from not wanting to be too close, or from missing him terribly. Either way, you don’t know if you’ll ever be able to muster up the same courage you once had. 
Turning to look at the pressed carnation in the vase atop your dresser, you laugh to yourself. It’s hard to believe that just a few months ago you thought that you would finally be able to tell him, to open up your heart and let him look into it like a kaleidoscope. Hard to believe that there was once a time when you thought that maybe, just maybe, he loved you back. It feels like it was eons ago. Like it was another universe entirely. 
You know that it’s not right for you to do this to Taehyung. He’s still your best friend. He always will be. He has no idea. He’ll never know. 
But sometimes—
Sometimes he comes home love drunk, wasted on kisses, splotches of pink lip gloss decorating his skin. 
Sometimes he spends dinner telling you all about the date he went on, the amazing vodka shrimp linguine he had, as the two of you eat Kirkland spaghetti in your dinky apartment. 
Sometimes he tells you that you’re his best friend, and that he misses you. 
Being in love with Taehyung had always been easy. It was being best friends, and making sure to keep the feelings a secret, that was hard. 
Taehyung isn’t home tonight. You hadn’t asked him where he’d be. You didn’t think that it mattered. 
And you tell yourself, over and over again, that it doesn’t matter. That you don’t need to know where he is every second of every day. He’s got a life outside of what exists in your stuffy apartment, a whole world of people craning to see him. He has reviews written about him in  The New York Times and people lining up outside the theater for his autograph on their Playbill. There’s so much more to his life than what he has with you. 
It’s better this way, you tell yourself, even if it’s not. Even if every time you step into your apartment, glance over at the vase on the kitchen table, you are reminded that it’s worse. Every time you see a damn carnation, daffodil, chrysanthemum, you can’t help but wish that things were different. You’re even starting to avoid Namjoon. 
That night finds you at a small Italian restaurant in a tiny alley off of Ninth Street. You’ve never been, but it had good reviews on Yelp and you could do with spending some time alone, wallowing in your feelings somewhere other than your bedroom. You’re starting to feel suffocated just being there. It would be good for you to get out. 
It would be good for you to get out, because the apartment reeks of what ifs, of what could have beens, and you can’t spend more than five minutes inside without throwing yourself your own personal pity party. You hardly see Taehyung nowadays because you can’t bear looking into his eyes anymore. Everything is awful, and you wish that it wasn’t, but you don’t know what to do to fix it. 
But Fate seems to love doing that thing where it’s out to get you. From the moment you met Kim Taehyung, Fate decided that you would be her next target. That no moment with him would leave you unscathed. And tonight is no exception. 
It’s just your luck that, ten minutes after you’re seated, the bell above the door rings to signal another customer, and you look up to see Taehyung and his girlfriend strolling in, glowing under the warm yellow light. You’ve never been more thankful, in that moment, to be seated right beside the bathroom, just out of sight of the booth that the hostess leads them to. It’s terrible, and it’s terrible, and it’s terrible. You watch as they order two glasses of a fancy rosé and giggle as they cheers to their show, to their lives, and to themselves. They spend the evening in the light of a single exposed bulb above their head, laughing and smiling and talking. 
The craziest part is that once upon a time, that would have been you. You and Taehyung would have decided that the night was a restaurant day and not a stay-at-home-and-cook-meal day. You would have found a quaint little place on Yelp and gotten the cheapest food on the menu. Once upon a time, you looked like that. 
[April 17th, 7:34PM]
Taehyung: [image sent] Taehyung: MMMMM look at this yummy yummy fish that I had tonight!! Taehyung: We should go here sometime!! I think you’d like it hehe
You look down at your plate. The food in front of you tastes like ash. 
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“Congrats,” you say when you hear Taehyung leaving his bedroom, feet padding against the hardwood floor as he makes his way to the kitchen. 
“Huh?” Taehyung asks, eyes wide. It’s almost as if he’s surprised to see you out here, sitting on the couch, answering emails. Like he can’t believe you’re in your own home. You can’t blame him. “What are you talking about?”
“The review on The New York Times,” you tell him distantly, switching over to the tab on your computer where you read it. There’s a picture at the top of Taehyung and his co-star, front and center, holding hands as they look off into the distance, staring into an unknown future. “It’s your first five star review, isn’t it? They even listed it as the Critic’s Pick.”
“Oh, I… uh,” he begins, “I haven’t seen it yet. Been too busy.”
Bitterly, you wonder why. Even when you two are further apart than you have ever been, even when he spends all day out of the apartment and you spend all day inside, even when you barely fucking see each other, you can’t help but click on the articles that mention him, scroll through every review that mentions his name. 
Things might be different now, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t be proud of him. Of what he does. Of who he is. 
“Well, they said great things,” you tell him, sparing him the trouble of looking. “You deserve it.”
“You’re coming tonight, right? You have to, if the play is getting such good reviews,” Taehyung asks, an olive branch. You’ve spent so much time doing everything you can to keep your relationship as distant as possible, hiding in your bedroom and eating dinner at odd hours. But this is the one thing that you both can still hold onto. Taehyung’s shows, his performances, and you, in the audience, always finding his eyes. If everything else is in shambles, at least you will always have this. “I think you’d like it.”
“It sounds very Matrix-y.”
“Well,” Taehyung says, shrugging. “It sort of is. But it’s also about love. You’d like that, right?”
You suppose you’d like it a little more in another timeline.
Taehyung continues, barely giving himself time to catch his breath. “Basically, these two kids are playing this life-simulation game where every move they make directly corresponds with the actions of the characters they’re playing as. Cue me and Lancaster. And we meet, and slowly fall in love, over a series of chance encounters. You know, a coffee shop, the bank, a restaurant.”
“Really?” You ask, brows furrowed. 
“Why?” Taehyung’s eyes widen in concern, smile downturned ever so slightly as he takes in your expression. 
“I don’t know—” you begin. There’s just something about the storyline that rubs you the wrong way. “Maybe I’m just being cynical. But is it really possible for two people to find love like that? Through chance? Luck?”
Perhaps, Namjoon would say. You can hear his voice echoing in your head now. After all, wasn’t it luck that brought the two of you together?
You shake his thoughts away. Namjoon’s got his own set of problems—he’s in no position to be the wise one in this scenario.
Taehyung shrugs, as if he’d never given that a thought to begin with. “I don’t know,” he says. “I think that love can blossom anywhere. Just so long as you nurture it, water it and give it lots of sunlight. I just—I think that if you look hard enough, you can find love anywhere.”
You turn to face him, blinking up at him as you stare at each other, sitting on this damn couch in the middle of your apartment. Taehyung waxes poetic in front of you, tells you that if you just fucking look for love, you’ll find it. But he doesn’t know—and he never will. You’ve been looking for love for the past four years, you’ve been searching in all of the nooks and crannies of your body, and the only place you’ve ever found it has been in the deep pit of your heart, dusty and quiet and forgotten. Even now, staring into his eyes, scanning every bit of his irises for even a sliver of it, a spark, you come up empty. 
How could he say something like that, when he lives with you? When he looks at you while you’re eating takeout or sitting and watching a movie together. Does he just not see it? Or worse—does he know, and just refuse to say anything?
Suddenly, your body turns cold. It’s hard to believe that someone as hopelessly romantic can’t see what’s right in front of him. 
“I wish that was how it worked,” you say sourly, the words leaving a bitter taste on your tongue. You snatch your laptop from the table and head into your room, leaving Taehyung alone on the couch, speechless.
He may be the one with flowers blooming in his heart, but you have been drowning for the past four years, and never have you felt further from the surface than right now. 
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You don’t go to Taehyung’s opening show that night. 
Taehyung leaves to get ready at the theater at three in the afternoon, and you bid him goodbye before holing yourself up in your bedroom and keeping yourself busy. You start watching the newest season of Stranger Things and tidy up the knick knacks you have scattered all over the place. Anything to keep your mind occupied. 
Taehyung texts you during intermission.
[June 3rd, 8:55PM]
Taehyung: Hey are you here?
You don’t respond. 
By ten at night, you end up with the cleanest room you’ve had in years and half of the season left to watch. It’s not a great kind of busy. The red carnation atop your dresser stares into your soul and you nearly throw it out three different times. But it’s an okay kind of busy, because you don’t know if you could have beared to see Taehyung on stage tonight. See him dancing around with a beautiful girl on his arm, confessing his love for her and pulling her in for a kiss. 
Over the years, you have seen Taehyung kiss so many people. From the shy freshman boy cast next to him in a student-written play in college to the model-esque women on stage in an off-Broadway play with him. And it never used to hurt—not like this. You saw him lock lips with another and you supposed that that was just show business. 
But it’s not show business anymore. It stopped being show business that night, when he came home to an apartment lit up with candles, the sweet scent of macarons wafting through the air, and told you he had found someone. It hasn’t been show business since, not when Taehyung is looking for love and finds it everywhere except where you wish he would look most. 
Maybe you’re just being selfish. Taehyung doesn’t have to love you for you to love him. You knew that. You lived with that. He’s your best friend. He always will be. You can’t do anything to force him to love you back. You had always been fine with just being friends. 
But just—knowing that he doesn’t feel the same. Having that certainty rooted deep within you. That’s the part that hurts the most. 
Taehyung comes home earlier than he normally would on a day like this, catching you in the kitchen as you brew some chamomile tea, hoping that it will calm the waves that crash against the pier inside you. You turn to meet his eyes, and suddenly, you feel like you can’t see anything in them at all. 
“Why didn’t you come tonight?” He demands. “I looked for you and you weren’t there. Where were you?”
“Here,” you tell him. “I was thinking maybe I would go tomorrow.”
“But you’re always at my opening show,” Taehyung says, like you don’t know that already. “Why didn’t you come? Did I do something wrong?”
“No, you didn’t,” you tell him. You don’t think you’re drunk or tired enough for this conversation. At ten at night, you’re still cognizant, aware of what consequences this conversation might have when you wake up in the morning. 
“Then why weren’t you there? You know I need you there,” Taehyung pleads, coming up to you as you stand in your kitchen, waiting for the kettle to boil.
“No, I didn’t know that,” you tell him firmly. You went to his opening shows because it was tradition. Not because it was necessary. 
“You’re my good luck charm, for god’s sake, Y/N,” Taehyung says, fists curled up at his sides. You can tell that he’s trying hard not to burst at the seams, like there are so many things he’s holding at the tip of his tongue. “I did such a shit job tonight without you there. I spent the entire first half of the show looking out into the crowd so much that Lancaster asked me if I had taken anything before we started.”
“That’s not my fault,” you tell him. “I didn’t know that you thought I was your good luck charm, or whatever.” And, because you’re bitter and petty and heartbroken, you add, “I would have thought that would be something your girlfriend is.”
Taehyung loses it. “What’s been going on with you, Y/N? Why are you being like this? Ever since my first show, I feel like we’re drifting further and further apart. You never want to spend time with me, you never want to come to my afterparties, you barely spare a glance at my girlfriends when I introduce them to you, and now, you’ve stopped coming to my shows. All of these things that I thought that we shared, ever since college. Tell me, Y/N, am I doing something wrong? Is there something that I’ve missed? Because it feels like we’re fucking strangers.”
The water finishes boiling, the kettle whistling on the stovetop as steam billows from the spout. “I’m not obligated to do any of those things, Taehyung,” you tell him harshly. “Just because we did them in college doesn’t mean I have to keep doing them now. What, did you think we’d still be doing that sort of stuff when we’re thirty? Forty, fifty? They were just college traditions.”
“‘College traditions’?” Taehyung asks, astounded. “Were all of those nights that we spent together just college traditions, too? Are we not allowed to do those things anymore? I miss you, Y/N. I hate not having you around and tonight was the worst it’s ever been. I don’t know what to do or say, I don’t know how to fix this, I don’t even fucking know what’s broken.”
“I just need space, Taehyung,” you tell him, hands gripping the edge of the countertop as you stare at the laminate, eyes tracing the lines to keep you from meeting his own. “I just need some time to myself, that’s all.”
“But why, Y/N?” Taehyung pleads, He reaches over to grab your hand, holds it in between the two of you like a lifeline. 
“‘Why?’” You echo angrily. “You don’t know? You can’t tell? We’ve known each other for four years and you haven’t realized?” You tug your hand from his grasp. It’s clear you’re beating a dead horse. You wonder why you even tried in the first place. How naive you were, standing in the kitchen surrounded by scented candles and flowers and macarons, dreaming of a life with him by your side. Foolish. 
“Realized what?” 
“That I’m in love with you!” You shout, and the world goes silent. The kettle stops whistling, the water having evaporated into nothing, the packet of chamomile tea left, forgotten on the countertop. You stand there, breaths heavy, chest heaving, as you look at Taehyung, angry and mad and in love, all at once. 
“You’re what?”
“Don’t make me say it again,” you hiss. “I already know that you don’t feel the same.”
“Y/N, wait—”
“Goodnight, Taehyung.” You turn on your heels, storming into your bedroom and collapsing against the door. Finally, finally, finally, you let the tears wrack your body, sending shivers down your spine. There’s salt on your tongue and smudged liner beneath your eyes. 
You thought pressing flowers makes them last forever. But even the red carnation is starting to shrivel. 
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Subject Title: New Project????
From Park, Seojoon, to me
Hi Taehyung,
You did a great job last night in Chance Card! Really proud of you for accomplishing so much. Pretty soon you’ll be on Broadway and be too big for a small manager like me. You’ll need an agent, and a publicist, and a stylist, and a dog-walker…
Anyway, just emailing to let you know that Hugo Cleveland reached out to me to see if you were interested in auditioning for his next play. He personally wanted to see if you liked the part, and would give you preference if you did want to audition. It’s called Cupid, and it’s another one of those modern-day retellings of an old tale. I thought you might like it. Attached is the script and a short description of the play. Let me know if you’d like to give it a shot! I think this might be the project that gets you onto Broadway!!
As always, contact me if you need anything at all.
Park
Taehyung, still in bed despite it being nearly noon, taps around on his phone, pulling up the description of the play. He hates reading PDFs on his phone, so he’ll check out the script on his laptop later. 
Cupid by Hugo Cleveland
Cupid chronicles the tale of the world’s most well known hopeless romantic—Cupid himself. Set in a world of magical realism, Cupid has the power to make two people fall in love with a single shot of his arrow, and spends his life walking around the city of New York, bow and arrow by his side. 
The only problem is that Cupid has no way to make people fall in love with him, because his magic operates under the assumption of soulmates—a single person meant for another. And as the years have gone by, he has searched and searched and searched over millennia, desperate to find love, but it’s almost as if everyone has soulmates except for him. 
Little does he know, he need look no further to find the person he shall spend the rest of his life with—not when his best friend has always been by his side. 
Taehyung glares at the description like it’s personally offended him. He knows that it’s just a coincidence that he happens to receive this email the morning after his fight with you, but he can’t help but feel like God is playing the world’s worst practical joke on him. 
Cursed with the memory of an actor, he replays last night in his head over and over and over again, looping the feed back and forth as your words echo in his mind. 
You don’t know? You can’t tell? We’ve known each other for four years and you haven’t realized?
He never knew what he was supposed to be looking for. You were just friends, you had always been just friends. But then he looked out in the crowd and couldn’t see you anywhere, couldn’t make out your eyes even in a sea of hundreds like he always does, and it felt like there was more than just another audience member missing. He spent the rest of the evening getting his hopes up, thinking that maybe you’re just sitting somewhere else, maybe you put in colored contacts, maybe you’re hidden by some really buff guy in front of you. 
He missed you, last night. He’s been missing you a lot recently, missing the way the days you spent together would bleed into nights. Missing the way you wrap your arms around him and smother him in cuddles, missing the way you always remember his takeout order for the fifteen different restaurants you frequent. Missing the way he once thought that you could spend your whole lives together. 
Realized what?
He supposes that he has always been a bit foolish. All of his ex-girlfriends broke up with him, never the other way around. And while they all ended on good terms, they all said the same thing to him: it always seemed like his heart belonged to someone else. But he misread that, too. He just thought that he hadn’t found the right person, yet. He would keep searching until he did. 
That I’m in love with you!
The craziest thing about it all is that your confession didn’t even shock him that much. After the initial surprise wore off, it was almost as if the dust settled around you, the storm finally calming. Like finding the last puzzle piece after thinking it had been lost for days. Like feeling everything click into place.
Taehyung has been thinking a lot about last night, but his least favorite part is always this:
I already know that you don’t feel the same.
He wishes that he could have told you. He wishes that he could have been strong enough, could have realized what he had before it slipped through his fingertips. Wishes that he could have reached out and grabbed onto you and never let go. There’s nothing more that he wants to do than see you again. You live in the same tiny New York apartment, and you’ve never felt further away from him. 
Taehyung wills himself out of bed and washes his face, clearing away the leftover makeup and the sleep in his eyes. It’s a fresh start. It’s a new day. 
He sees you standing in the kitchen, making that tea that you had left forgotten last night. He catches your eyes for just a second before he loses them again, watches as you turn your back to him in a desperate attempt to avoid contact. 
“I got a new potential show to audition for,” he says loudly, breaking the silence. 
“That’s cool,” you say, emotionless. 
“Do you want to know what it’s about?”
You don’t respond. Taehyung takes this as a cue to continue. 
“It’s about a boy on a search for love,” Taehyung begins, rallying himself despite only being able to see your back. “And he goes out and sees all of these people falling in love and wants that for himself. And he wonders why nothing is sticking, why he can’t seem to fall in love with anybody. And then he realizes that the reason he can’t seem to fall in love with anyone else is because he’s already found his person.” A pause. He’s just summarizing a story, but this feels like a confession. “His best friend.”
You turn around sharply, tea sloshing in the cup in your hand. Taehyung inhales, then exhales. It’s now or never. You’ve been friends for so long. Who’s to say you can’t be more than that?
“Don’t you think I’d play this part well?” He asks. 
You shrug, closing your eyes and breathing heavy. He can tell that you’re holding something back, trying not to burst at the seams. “I’m not sure, Tae.”
“I think I would,” Taehyung tells you confidently. He takes a step closer to you, reaches over to take the cup of tea from your hands, placing it on the counter. “Because I’ve been doing it for so long, already.”
You gasp when he kisses you, a gust of air escaping your lips and immediately mixing with his, seize up at the feeling of his lips on yours. Immediately, Taehyung wonders if he’s overstepped a boundary, or two, or five, but then he feels you relax under his touch, feels you reach your hands up to cup his cheeks as you press against him insistently, drunk on the taste of his lips on your own. 
Taehyung’s kissed a lot of people in his day, but this one is different. He’s felt sparks, seen fireworks, but with you, it’s as if he’s sinking into a warm bath after a cold day. As if he’s returning to an apartment filled with the things he loves after a long day out. As if he’s coming home. 
All of these emotions, all of the little things tucked away in the corners of his soul, in the dark attic of his heart, come bubbling up to the surface, and all he can do is hope that you can feel them, swallow them up like wine, as you press your lips against his, grinning. 
Finally, you pull yourself away, almost as if you think you’ll get drunk if you keep going. 
“How long?” You ask. 
Taehyung shrugs. “I don’t know. A while now, definitely.”
“Really?”
“I think so,” Taehyung says. “I guess that I was wrong, what I said before about looking for love. I looked everywhere, I wanted to see it in every spark that was set my way, but I forgot the most important place. I should have known.” You curl into his touch, resting your head against his chest as his arms wrap around your waist. “How about you?”
“Forever,” you breathe out. “It started and it never stopped.”
Taehyung beams. The flowerbud in his heart had been shuttered for so long, hardly watered and never in the sun. And then suddenly, the curtains opened up and the clouds began to cry, and everything blossomed. You make him feel like he’s always home. You make him feel safe. 
You make him feel like a red carnation in bloom.
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↳ links are broken, but don’t forget to message me with any thoughts or feedback!
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storiesforallfandoms · 4 years ago
Text
first show ~ aaron tveit
word count: 1756
request?: yes!
“I'll take anything Aaron Tveit. (There are not enough fics out there lol)”
description: after years of practice and studying, she gets casted in her first big broadway show, and finds herself falling for her leading man
pairing: aaron tveit x female!reader
warnings: swearing
masterlist (one, two)
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I gasped as the costume person pulled out the beautiful black dress I was meant to wear for our run through of Come What May. I couldn’t get over how beautiful my costumes were. I almost felt like I was undeserving of them. I was fresh out of college and already cast in my first big Broadway musical. If this was a dream, I didn’t want to ever wake up.
“You don’t have long to get dressed,” the costume person reminded me. “The dress rehearsal for Come What May is in 10. Although I’d love to see you staring at all your costumes in amazement.”
“I’ll do that after dress rehearsal,” I joked.
I took the black dress and quickly changed into it, longing to look at myself in the mirror but knowing I had no time. With my hair and makeup already finished, I rushed to the stage. Luckily, I wasn’t the only one running a bit late as my co-star was yet to arrive once I took my place.
“There’s our Satine!” the director proclaimed as I stood on stage. “Welcome to the stage, dear. How do you feel?”
“Nervous,” I admitted. “But I look damn good for a nervous girl.”
The director chuckled. “Our Christian should be here soon.”
“He’s here!”
I tried not to seem as starstruck as I felt at the sound of my co-star’s voice. Aaron joined me on stage, dressed in his Christian costume. I had to try my best not to fangirl over him. He was basically Broadway royalty, and I was acting with him in my first show! I had to remind myself how to breathe.
I smiled slightly at him. ���Nice to meet you. I’m (Y/N).”
“Nice to meet you, too, (Y/N). I’m Aaron.”
I had to stop myself from responded with I know as I shook his hand.
“While I’d love for you two to get to know one another, I’d like to run Come What May first,” the director told us. “It’s one of the biggest songs in the musical, and the one with the most chemistry. So, we need to nail this song before we can nail the entire musical.”
Aaron and I nodded and took our places for the song. The band started playing the song and I felt my nerves growing. I tried to focus just on Aaron, but that made me even more nervous.
“Never knew I could feel like this Like I’ve never seen the sky before Want to vanish inside your kiss Every day I love you more and more”
No shock that his voice sounded perfect. I already knew this, I had seen the show on its opening night years before. But it was different to hear the voice up close, too have him singing directly to me. It made my heart flutter and I almost forgot my cues.
“Come what may Come what may I will love you until my dying day”
For a moment I feared my voice wouldn’t work, but when I opened my mouth the words came out effortlessly.
“Suddenly the world seems such a perfect place Suddenly it moves with such a perfect grace”
I tried not to break character as pride swelled within me at the look on Aaron’s face. I could only describe it as a look of astonishment, as if my voice shocked him, and that made me so proud.
My heart spiked as Aaron took my hands and we sang together
“Storm clouds my gather And stars may collide But I love you (I love you) Until the end of time”
The music swelled as we reached the end of the song, our voices mixing together perfectly as we held the last line. I looked into Aaron’s perfectly blue eyes, glad that the song had ended because he had taken my breath away.
I had forgotten all about the small audience of crew members and our director until he spoke. “That was great! But can we take it from that last chorus and can you guys end the song with the kiss?”
“O-Oh,” I stuttered, still trying to recover from the song. “Y-You want to do the kiss now?”
“It’s better to get the first one out of the way now to get past any initial awkwardness.”
“Are you okay with that?” Aaron asked me, concern on his face.
I nodded. “Yeah. He has a point, we will be kissing almost every night. We should get used to it now.”
The director motioned to the band and they began playing from the last chorus again.
“Come what may Come what may I will love you until my dying day”
I looked into Aaron’s eyes, the only thing keeping me calm in that moment. One of his hands reached up to gently cup my face, bringing me closer to him. The distance between us was small, but it felt like I was waiting for his lips to touch mine forever.
When they finally did, it felt as though something had exploded inside of me. My whole body felt warm and fuzzy, and my stomach felt like it was full of butterflies. I couldn’t stop myself from putting a hand behind his neck, wanting to keep his lips on mine for a long time.
We were forced to pull away when the director began to clap, completely taking us out of the moment.
“That’s what I’m talking about!” he exclaimed. “That was brilliant! See? Now there’ll be no awkwardness when we run that scene from now on.”
I wouldn’t say that, I thought, glancing over at Aaron. I wondered if he had felt what I did, or if it was just another stage kiss for him. If he felt the latter, it would definitely be very awkward for me.
“Okay, you two take five and then (Y/N), I want you ready for your entrance medley.”
The crew continued on about their work while the director turned his attention to his assistant and began talking about the technical stuff having to do with the show. Aaron and I awkwardly stood on stage together for a moment, unsure of what to do next.
“I guess I should go get ready for my entrance rehearsal,” I said, trying my best to look at Aaron. How the hell did two actors who weren’t already in relationships kiss on stage and not fall in love?
“I’ll walk you to your dressing room,” Aaron offered. “We can get to know one another.”
I smiled at this and the two of us exited the stage together.
“So,” Aaron started, “there’s a rumor on the streets that this is your first ever show.”
I nodded. “Yeah, it is. I’m actually not long out of college. I graduated maybe a month ago? Top of my classes because I was always an overachiever, and most of my teacher’s favorites. Actually, it was one of my teachers that got me this audition. She knows the director and when it was announced that Karen Olivo was leaving the show, she urged me to audition.”
“Looks like it worked out in your favor.”
“Yeah, somehow,” I said with a slight laugh. “I’m sure there were dozens of better, more experienced girls who auditioned. My teacher must’ve slipped the director a bribe or something to get me this role.”
“Or, and hear me out on this one, you were actually that good and got the role on your own.”
I shook my head. “No way. That’s nearly impossible.”
“Nearly being the keyword. Newbies gotta start somehow or else Broadway shows would never have a cast.”
“Yeah, but most newbies start as a part of the ensemble or the company, then make their way to very minor character, then less than minor character, and then, if they’re lucky, they become main characters. It’s not as easy as auditioning fresh out of school and getting the role right away.”
Aaron shrugged. “I don’t know, I think it’s that easy for some people. You have a fantastic voice, definitely a voice worth of a Satine and not just an ensemble girl.”
I smiled up at Aaron. “I appreciate the compliment, and the confidence you have in me. I hope I don’t let any of you guys down.”
“I don’t think you will. I think you’re going to be amazing. You’ll probably steal the show from me.”
I laughed at this. There was absolutely no way that I, a newbie, could possibly steal the show from a Broadway vet like Aaron Tveit.
I was sad when we reached my dressing room, although I knew it wasn’t that far of a walk from the stage. I wanted to talk to Aaron for longer, to have more time alone with him. But we were trying to prepare a show, and that meant that eventually I had to give up my time with him in order to rehearse.
Both of us paused outside of my dressing room. It was almost like we were waiting for the other to leave first. I glanced at the clock in my dressing room and sighed upon seeing the time.
“I have about two more minutes to get into my costume for my entrance medley and to get back to the stage. So, I guess this is where we say goodbye.”
“Well, only for now. I’ll be in the audience watching you absolutely destroy that medley, and then we have basically the entire play together that we have to rehearse,” he told me. “But, if you’re not too tired after rehearsal, I’d love to maybe go out and grab a drink with you. If you’d be interested in doing that, that is.”
Now was when my voice stopped working. I could barley believe that this was actually happening. Too many amazing things going on the one time, I was sure I was dreaming. I had to slip my hands behind my back to pinch myself, and I had to suppress a yelp as I realized I was very much awake.
“Yeah,” I finally managed. “I’d love to.”
Aaron’s smile was as wide as a child on Christmas morning. “Okay! Well, I won’t distract you any longer. Break a leg out there.”
I watched after him as he went back in the direction of the stage before hurrying into my dressing room to prepare for my next scene. The entire time I had a smile on my face so wide that my cheeks were starting to hurt.
I guess dreams really do come true.
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schnitzelbutterfingers · 4 years ago
Text
Baklava
Book/Pairing(s): The Royal Romance || Liam Rhys x F!MC (Jasmine Wilson) LAW STUDENT AU
Category/Warning(s): Teen || none
Word count: 2.7K
Premise: A different take on how Liam and Jasmine could have met. Liam and the gang search for baklava, and Jasmine is a law student and a talented baker, working in her mother’s bakery.
Author’s note: This is for the 200 FOLLOWER GIVEAWAY WINNER #2: @texaskitten30 . Congratulations! Hope you enjoy :)
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New York City is known for its culture, fashion, Broadway musicals. Its approximately 8 million people.
Maxwell sighs. “C’mon, Liam. There are so many other desserts. Pie, cake, cupcakes, those drizzled thingies...”
He is right. The deserts here are magnificent. Every one of them is fireworks on someone’s tongue, the rich flavor evading the mouth.
Drake surprises him. “For once in my life, I’m going with Beaumont.”
But there is one thing New York City seems to not have.
“No,” Liam responds.
Baklava.
Maxwell open his mouth, but then closes it, flabbergasted. 
“Who are you, and what have you done to Prince Liam?”
The prince chuckles wryly, a sarcastic leer taking place. In a few months, he won’t be able to do this again. In a few months, he will marry a noble with no love in between. 
In a few months, his freedom will be over.
He has to make those few months worth it.
And he will.
By finding baklava.
However, Liam almost gives up. Every bakery they went to in New York City had everything, including Indian sweets, such as laddu, gulab jamun, jalebi.
But they weren’t selling anything from the Ottoman Empire. They weren’t selling baklava.
Out of the corner of his eyes, he sees a small building. A bakery. It has a small cupcake on the top of the name. 
The prince clears his throat.
“We’ll stop in this bakery. If they don’t have baklava either, then we can go buy cupcakes and go to a bar.”
Maxwell fist bumping the air and Drake sighing of relief, tells him they are both comfortable with his plan.
One more bakery.
That’s it.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Slow Dough.
That’s the name of the bakery. Immensely creative.
The three men step out of their rented car, the sun’s rays showing off its magnificent light, creating shadows as they take each step towards the bakery.
They open the door, the jingling bells on it acknowledging their presence.
It looks beautiful. The inside of the store takes on a more pastel theme, the baby pink with white stripes adorning the walls. There are sky blue tables and chairs, adorned with a vase of pink roses on each table.
The front of the bakery has a glass counter-shelf, filled with delicacies. Cupcakes, cookies, chocolate, ice cream. You name it.
Maxwell seems to have that same idea because he says, “Maybe we can steal some cronuts and-”
“Maxwell!” Drake admonishes.
“Hello? What is the commotion here?”
A woman, probably in her fifties, with natural tanned skin, paces into the room from the silver doors ahead of the counter, which Liam assumes is the kitchen. Rather than taking a chiding tone, her voice is laced with concern.
Liam glares at his two friends, Maxwell sporting a nervous smile. Drake shakes his head at Maxwell’s antics.
What good friends he has.
“Apologies for the loud... conversation ma’am. We were searching for a dessert named baklava in New York City. We searched almost every bakery we could find, but left empty-handed. We were hoping we would find some here?”
The woman grimaces. “I’m so sorry, son, but we don’t sell baklava here.”
The prince sighs. 
He knew it. Of course he did.
After mentally calming himself, he sports a tender smile.
“No worries, ma’am. In that case, would you mind giving us three cupcakes? One vanilla and the other two chocolate, please?”
“Now that, I can give you.”
She smiles as she opens the counter, probably finding the best cupcakes she could find.
The woman is probably the most solicitous person she ever met during his bachelor party.
The men sit down on of the chairs, surprisingly more comfortable than Liam imagined. They fall into an agreeable silence, with Maxwell playing with one of the pink rose petals, and Drake glued to his phone.
And they are interrupted. By a soft voice.
A beautiful voice.
“Excuse me, sir, but... did you say baklava?”
He stands up immediately to turn towards the voice, addicted to the melody.
And hazel eyes meets blue.
The lady looks like an exact copy of the older woman, only more younger. More irresistible.
Striking.
Even with glasses on.
For some reason, his heart starts beating faster.
Silently scolding himself, he straightens up and nods his head affirmative.
“Yes, is there a reason why you ask?”
“I happen to know how to make baklava. Do you want me to make some for you?”
Shock rolls over him as he mulls over her words. An American tries to help him?
He glances back at Drake and Maxwell. In return, they give him an exact sense of a whammy blown on them. They are probably thinking the same thing, too.
Liam discerns the older woman slapping her hand on her forehead in an almost idiotic sense, walking to stand next to the younger woman.
Twins.
They are practically twins, if people count out the wrinkles.
“Apologies, son. She is my daughter. She knows how to make almost everything.”
Liam softly grins at the mother and turns to look at her daughter. 
A beauty.
As if she came from a painting.
Majestic.
As if reading his thoughts, she takes a glimpse of his face and smiles. He catches a glimpse of a faint blush creeping on her neck, even with the tanned skin.
Liam allows himself a quick smirk and hurriedly straightens his face to a more gentle expression.
“What’s your name?”
She clears her throat and looks at him straight in the eye. “Jasmine.”
Maxwell gives her a wide smile. “Nice name!”
Liam and Drake nod their heads in agreement, looking back at Jasmine. She grins from ear to ear.
Her smile is infectious.
And Liam just met this girl.
“I’ll get started. I can set up a mini cooking show for you guys. This might take over an hour though. So, are you sure?”
Before Liam can respond, Drake interrupts.
“We can wait. This dude, here, was acting like he was waiting for baklava his whole life. If he doesn’t get his hands on one, he’ll probably punch something.”
“Drake!”
Before he can give him a new one, he hears Jasmine’s laughter, music to his ears. He only knew her for about 10 minutes, and something makes him want to get closer to her.
He can see scars sprinkled on her chest.
She’s an air of mystery.
Mystery.
“I can most definitely understand that feeling. I’ll go gather the ingredients!”
She flees like a small human Sonic, and he infers for a second that she did track in school. 
Maybe she did.
Jasmine comes back with nuts, cinnamon, dough, butter, sugar, water, honey, vanilla extract, and a lemon. After buttering up a thick pan, she sprinkles in a bunch of nuts and cinnamon.
Just like those chefs gave him a show and made baklava for him back in Greece.
Maxwell starts speaking, most likely attempting to make small talk during the awkward silence.
“So... where are you originally from?”
She softly smiles.
“Queens, New York. We moved to the city when I was 10.”
“What made you move to the city?”
“Oh, well...”
Jasmine slightly hesitates.
“My father had passed away, and we had to do something for a living. So we started this bakery...”
A tense silence invades the bakery, Jasmine quickly swiping her eyes. Maxwell grimaces, and Drake takes over.
“We’re so sorry. We didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable...”
She shoots him a weak grin. “It’s okay. It still hurts, but we’re trying our best to move on.”
At this point, she places two sheets of dough into the pan, and butters it up. She then layers it with nuts and repeats the process. The prince makes a mental note to remember these steps the next time he attempts in making baklava.
He tried to make baklava once, but failed, even after searching the internet to find the recipe.
It had been proved to his friends how much of a bad cook he is.
Liam attempts successfully in changing the topic, in a way to console her.
“Are you a student or...”
“I am! Final year law student at Yale.”
His eyes widen. “Yale? That’s impressive.”
Her mother comes back from the kitchen. “Wait till you hear how she skipped five grades and will be graduating as a lawyer at the age of 21.”
The gang’s eyes widen.
Wow. 
They’re speaking to mini Albert Einstein.
“Mom!”  The law student covers her cheeks in an attempt to stop the light rose pink that’s flooding her face.
Maxwell smiles wickedly. “That's so COOL! Liam, here, is the same! He managed to even excel better than his tutors. One time, he was making fun of them because they got a calculus problem wrong, and he managed to solve it in less than five minutes! He skipped three grades, but always managed to make tutors mad and made them speak to his parents because of his smart mouth-”
“Maxwell!”
Drake chuckles.
“What? It’s the truth!”
She chortles again. That melodic laugh.
“It’s alright. I did that every time, too.”
Jasmine cuts the baklava into diamond shapes and puts them into the oven. She stretches her arms out, unsubtly displaying off her muscles.
Damn.
“Alright. This’ll take about 50 minutes.”
Comfortable silence flows through all of them, Liam enjoying the clock ticking surrounding the small building.
Drake cuts it off. “We forgot to tell you where we’re from. We live in-”
“Cordonia, I know.”
Liam's breath catches.
A part of him wants to berate himself for being so idiotic. For believing that maybe one person won’t know who he is. But he should have known.
He should have known.
Drake closes his mouth and opens it again, unable to say anything.
“Wait, so you know Liam is a prince?”
“Crown Prince, yeah.”
“Then, why didn’t you let us know and treat us like normal people?”
“Because I know.”
Turning to him, she says, “Liam, all you’ve ever wanted was freedom.”
His eyes widen. He feels like he’s being mind-read by a fortune teller. At that moment he should’ve felt uneasy, but all he wants to do is open more of himself to her.
And that petrifies him.
“How... how do you know?”
Jasmine’s expression turns stoic, indecipherable.
“Your eyes. They express everything. You feel like you’re being locked in a jail cell. I was once like you, you know so I know that look anywhere...”
Her eyes turn misty, but she quickly shakes her head.
“You do want to lead your people, but you want to be free in choosing someone at the same time. You want someone you’ll fall in love with.”
Her educated guess is mind-boggling. Straying his eyes back to his friends, they appear as if they’re seeing Liam in a new light. Shocked.
That they didn’t know anything about this, and they’ve known him for years.
Maxwell shakes his head. “Wait, but... if you knew who we were, why didn’t you address Liam as ‘your highness’? Don’t get me wrong, we liked how you didn’t...”
Jasmine snorts. “Because even through he has royalty flowing through his blood, he is a human, just like us. I don’t mean it to be offensive, I swear. While titles also show respect, they put more benefit for someone than for another ‘commoner’. And I don’t like that.”
Liam becomes curious. Jasmine is not one of those average girls who shrieks over a celebrity. She is one of a kind.
And that makes him want to know everything about her.
“Say if... you became a queen one day. How will you rule?”
The law student takes a deep breath before responding. She unconsciously touches her dark brown hair, and twirls a curl over her finger.
“I... I would never go by the rule book. While rules are good and all, sometimes... it would lead to injustice. As Princess Diana said in her interview with Martin Bashir, I would  want to become a queen of people’s hearts, not just for a country. I would be there to do good, not cause harm or difficulty over another citizen’s life. I’m not a violent person. Quite the opposite, actually. I would want to be treated as a typical person with a typical life. I would want to be treated as an everyday person. And... I would want everyone to reminisce me as a woman who did good works, not as a woman with a prestigious title.”
Everything is confirmed. Drake’s mouth opens and closes as he tries to respond to what Jasmine just said. Maxwell has a goofy grin on his face.
Liam, however, has a cheeky smile that one would actually say is of respect and admiration. He admires her.
Even as she now bites her lip, he wants nothing more press his lips to hers. 
And they’ve only known each other for about an hour.
The oven alarm lowers the mounting tension in the bakery. Jasmine jogs over to the oven and takes it. The delicious smell of baklava invades Liam’s nostrils, and he immediately wants to taste it. Looking at the pastry, the gorgeous crispy brown of the dough stands out, with green nuts garnished.
“Take caution! It’s really hot.”
Maxwell smirks slightly, already reaching for a baklava. “Oh, I don’t think it’s that- HOLY SQUIDS!”
The once smirking Maxwell now has a face of pain etched on his face, holding his right hand after it burned a little. Jasmine, seeing this, snorts.
“Told you so.”
Shaking his head, Liam -carefully- takes  a piece of baklava, blowing it slightly to soothe the heat. Once it is lowered to a considerable heat, he takes a bite out of it and-
My.
God.
It is scrumptious.
And it appears that Drake and Maxwell are thinking the same thing, their friends’ eyes filled with astonishment.
Jasmine bites her lip, most likely unaware of the action. God, if he could just-
“So, did you like it?”
Shaking off his dirty thoughts, he responds, “Like it? This is the best baklava I’ve ever tasted.”
Her wide eyes contain jouissance, Liam can tell.
“Thank you! Glad I didn’t mess it up!”
Jasmine blushes again, something Liam just knows is a rare sight for anyone.
Just then, her mother comes in, sauntering hurriedly up to them. Her eyes are tense and full of worry.
“So... how is the baklava?”
Liam smiles, hopefully soothing her mother with the action.
“I can reassure you, even the most famous chefs in Greece hadn’t made me this tasty baklava before in my life. It tastes like heaven, ma’am. Your daughter has talent.”
She sighs in relief. “Thank you, sons!”
Without hesitance, the mother kisses Jasmine on her cheek, and in return the daughter kisses her on her forehead. The act reminds him of his own mother, before she died.
“How much does this cost?” Drake interrupts.
“This? This is free.”
What?
Liam refuses. “Oh, that’s not possible, we have to give you something-”
Jasmine laughs. “I insist. First of all, this wasn’t even part of the menu, although we do need to add it to ours. Second, you deserve this. For the first time, other than my mother, I felt like someone else got me.”
The words make the prince look at her deeply into her eyes. Jasmine stares back, not one of them blinking. Finally, the law student breaks the contact.
Just then, Drake clears his throat. “I hate to interrupt but we have to leave. Is it alright if we take more of these?”
The mother smiles. “Sure, sweetie! Take as much as you need.”
As Maxwell and Drake grab more of the baklava, Liam goes up to Jasmine.
“Well, I guess this is goodbye,” he says, his tone with a hint of heartache.
She smiles wistfully. “Yeah.”
And they hesitate before hugging one another tightly. Liam closes his eyes, in what could be his last moments of freedom. He makes this time worth it. Jasmine reluctantly pulls back and clears her throat.
“But hey, something tells me we’ll see each other again soon,” she adds, with a hint of a smirk.
And just like that, Liam starts to have second thoughts.
Maybe New York City is not that awful.
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Narrator: Jasmine was right in what she said. They will see each other again. And they marry, and they make babies-
Author’s note: First Liam x MC fic lol. I hope I did this some justice HAHA. Anyways, if you’ve made it this far, thank you! ♥️
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Perma: @potionsprefect @gryffindordaughterofathena @maurine07 @missmiimiie @mom2000aggie @nezuzoned
Liam x MC: @kingliam2019 @jared2612
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plaidbooks · 4 years ago
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Hiiiii love! Can I request a Barba x Reader the first time they meet? And he knows that he wants you???
First Dance
A/N: I...I just keep using Hamilton as my go-to play, and I’m not sure why. I’m ignorant of Broadway, and I apologize. This was also just an excuse to write a gala scene, so I hope you don’t mind! Thanks for the request @infiniteoddball
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Taglist: @the-baby-bookworm @beccabarba @thatesqcrush @itsjustmyfantasyroom @stardust-fray @permanentlydizzy @infiniteoddball @glowingmess @ben-c-group-therapy @averyhotchner @mrsrafaelbarba @whimsicallymad @detective-giggles @dianilaws
For once, everything in Rafael’s life was looking up; he had just secured three tough convictions, with another two looking to be going in his favor. His mother was just granted extra funding for her charter school, and she was able to hire on extra help. The Yankees were going to the World Series and Hamilton was coming back to Broadway, and Rafael had gotten tickets to both. The only slight dim spot was that he had one ticket to those. That he didn’t have anyone to celebrate with, outside of maybe catching a nightcap with Olivia. But now that she had Noah, that was happening less and less. And Rafael realized that with his view from the top of the mountain, he could see how alone he was. With every win, though, that loss sunk further and further into the back of his mind, hidden behind tight-lipped smirks and smartass quips.
He was sitting in his office, going over his final revisions for a closing argument when there was a light knock on his door. “Enter,” he called out, not bothering to glance up.
“Uh, are you Mr. Barba?” a voice asked. He looked up then, not recognizing the voice. His eyes widened slightly as he took you in, but he recovered quickly; you were beautiful.
“I am. And you are?”
“Detective [Y/L/N]…and I’m here to pick up a warrant,” you smiled shyly at him. You had heard all the rumors about ADA Rafael Barba; the good and the bad. He was passionate, quick-witted, wanting justice for the victims. He was also sarcastic, pushy, and downright rude.
Rafael shuffled through some files on his desk. “The Langford’s apartment, yes?” he asked, and you confirmed. He found the correct warrant, pulling it out and glancing over it before handing it to you. Your fingers brushed his, and a jolt ran through him. Smiling brightly once more, you turned to leave with a small thanks.
Maybe it was because of the many wins recently that made him stop you. “Detective?” he called, causing you to stop and turn back to him, hand on the doorknob. Or maybe it was that one loss he still had. “Would you like to get a nightcap with me? I like to meet with the people I’ll be working with.”
Your eyes widened for half a moment before that shy smile was back. “I would love to, but I can’t tonight. Raincheck?”
“Of course,” Rafael replied, a tight-lipped smile and a nod, a clear dismissal. He watched you leave, and he felt something he hadn’t felt in a long time; a wanting. A yearning, deep within his heart.
 *******************
The next time Rafael saw you was in the precinct, partnered with Carisi and interrogating a hardened pimp. At first, Rafael was concerned that Olivia was letting the two greenest Detectives go at this guy, simply because he wanted an air-tight case against the bastard. But as he watched you and Carisi work, he was in awe at how you conducted yourself, and he found that the wanting, the yearning, hasn’t lessened at all. His mind wandered as he watched you lean over the table, your pants pulled tight over your ass, and he wondered what you looked like under your clothes, what you sounded like when he….
The door opened, and he pulled himself out of the gutter. “Oh, hello Mr. Barba,” you smiled when you came out of the interrogation room, taking his breath away.
“Detective,” he nodded back, a small smile tugging across his own face, as if he wasn’t just picturing you on your back in his bed. “You did well in there.”
“Did hell just freeze over? Because I think you just got a compliment from Barba,” Carisi joked, elbowing you and smirking. Rafael gave him an impressive glare, and you laughed. The sound was so magical, his glare fell flat, and he moved to the Bullpen with you to hear Rollins’ rundown of what they had so far.
Once he got all the information he needed, Rafael stood, pulling his jacket back on and heading towards the exit. “Let me walk you out, counselor,” you said.
“Please,” he replied, surprised, but not unhappy. You followed him to the elevator, hitting the button and getting into the confined space with him. This close, you got to examine the brightness of his eyes, the flecks of grey in his hair, the intoxicating aroma of his cologne. It made your knees weak.
“I’m free tonight, if you want to turn in that raincheck,” you murmured, unsure of yourself. You were a little afraid that when he asked the first time, it was a spur of the moment question, and that he’d decline now.
Yes, Rafael thought instantly, and he almost said it. Almost. “As much as I want to, I’m…busy tonight.” He cursed himself for accepting a dinner with McCoy, to go over his next re-election.
“Ah, no worries,” you replied, your heart sinking.
Rafael hated the look of sadness in your eyes, the rejection obvious on your face. “There’s a charity gala in two weeks. I have to make an appearance to please my bosses, and I’m sure most of, if not all of your department will be there, too. We could try to talk then?”
The doors dinged, sliding open, but Rafael made no move to leave. “Uh, yeah! As long as I’m not stuck working OT…I’m still the new kid on the block, so I get the worst shifts,” you chuckled, rubbing your arm nervously.
Rafael gave you a grin. “I’ll see you then, Detective.” And with that, he left the elevator.
You watched him leave, the doors closing in your face. “See you then, Mr. Barba.”
 *********************
You were in a floor length, silver, A-line style dress that had golden details. Looking in the mirror, you felt like you were Cinderella. You felt elegant, distinguished, not something that you normally got to feel. You had worked your way up through the Brooklyn patrol office, making your way to SVU detective—it was rare indeed that you got to dress-up in anything that wasn’t a skimpy outfit for an undercover op.
This was your first charity gala; you had gone to little charity events for the NYPD, of course. But until you had your detective’s badge, there was no pressure to go to events. So, your eyes lit up when you saw the decorations inside the building, your mouth dropping open. Now you really felt like Cinderella as you walked in.
“Hey, partner,” Carisi said, making his way to you. Your grin matched his as he linked and arm through yours, pulling you towards the bar. “Can I buy ya a drink?”
“Sure, Sonny, that sounds great,” you replied, giggling as he dragged you over. You were so glad that you were partnered with Carisi; he had made you feel instantly at home at SVU, and he was instantly your best friend.
You had just finished your first drink when Rafael appeared at the bar next to you, wearing a simple black tux, and making the heat rise in your cheeks.
“Hello Detective.” Rafael got the bartender’s attention, ordering himself a scotch.
“Mr. Barba,” you greeted.
“Please, call me Rafael.”
“Only if you stop calling me ‘detective’,” you smirked back. His eyes sparkled mischievously, and he took a sip of his drink.
“Deal,” he replied. “Now, tell me how you got here. Why SVU?”
 *********************
You spent most of the night chatting with Rafael, answering questions and sipping at your drinks. You vaguely noticed that he deflected most questions about himself, focusing more on you. Olivia had warned you that he was a pretty private man, so this wasn’t too shocking to you.
Eventually, Rafael glanced to the dance floor, then back to you. “Care for a dance?”
You felt your cheeks warm. “Uh, sure,” you smiled shyly, taking his offered hand, and letting him lead you to the huge ballroom floor. He kept his hands high on your waist, your hands on his shoulders, as he twirled you around the dance floor.
“So, you said you were going to Hamilton?” you asked idly, swaying with him, his warmth comforting, drawing you in.
Rafael grinned at you. “I am. Have you seen it?”
“I have not. But I was able to snag a ticket before they sold out, so I will be seeing it.”
He spun you around, and he dipped you, making your heart leap into your throat. His green eyes were bright as he pulled you back up. “Would you like to go together?”
“Rafael Barba, are you asking me out on a date?” The song ended, but you both stood there, not leaving the dance floor.
“So, what if I am?” he asked, voice low.
You stood there, dumbfounded, your face on fire. He was attractive, you had to admit. But could you date an ADA, especially one you worked with? What would 1PP think? What would Liv think, Dodds? You were still new; would they fire you for this? Transfer you?
“A-are you sure that’s appropriate?” you asked, voice just as low. The music had started back up, couples moving around you. Rafael replaced his hands on your waist, leading you into another dance, and you jumped to keep up.
“It’s one date—no one needs to know about it. Not yet.”
“And if it becomes more than one date?” you asked, searching his eyes.
Rafael’s eyes flashed, a triumphant smirk on his face, as if he won simply by you thinking about having more than one date with him. “Then we will figure it out. But I’d rather not count the jury before the trial.”
You scoffed at his reference, rolling your eyes. “Okay, theatre date it is,” you smiled at him.
His grin broadened, and he pulled you to him. To the outside world, he was whispering something, probably work related, to you. In reality, Rafael pressed a small kiss under your ear, making you freeze in place, heat creeping up your face.
“I’ll see you then,” he whispered into your ear before he pulled away, leaving you standing on the dance floor. Oh, Rafael loved to win, and he was already planning on how to win your heart.
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grasslandgirl · 4 years ago
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do you like plays/musicals? and if you do which are your favorites?
in case you couldn’t tell by. Everything about the way that I am. I’m a recovering theatre kid and this ask is like waving a red flag in front of a bull in the best possible way. Mutuals and followers, if you don’t want to see me take this as a wholehearted excuse to talk loudly, exuberantly, and at length about theatre, please keep scrolling, ty ily and I’m sorry 💛
I was lucky enough to go to a high school with a very vivacious theatre department with a very experienced and talented teacher. It was kind of like a second home to me and I spent more time after school in rehearsals than was probably healthy, but here we are. I think I did around 13 shows while I was in high school, 5 of which I did during my senior year. I acted in most of them, but was lucky enough to get the opportunity to work on the production team for some, and to be able to direct or co-direct two of them.
Straight plays (non musicals):
DNA, by Dennis Kelly: technically a dark comedy that probably leans a little too close in to horrific tragedy territory, this was the first show that made me really understand what theatre was and what it meant to Act. That it wasn’t just standing on a stage and saying words. In retrospect this show was probably a little too dark and a little too graphic for us as a cast of mostly 15 and 16 year olds but you know what. You live and you learn. It’s a brilliantly written script that really delves into the social structure of high school friendships and group dynamics, and how tragedy can both bind a group together and also tear them apart. To this day one of my favorite shows I’ve ever done and probably the show I’d be most eager to do again if given the opportunity
you can read dna here!!
Antigone, the Anne Carson translation: a really breathtaking and poetic translation of the classic Greek tragedy, the text of this show is so dense and layered with so many secondary and tertiary meanings, and it was an absolute delight to get to work on. I remember spending so much rehearsal time really digging into the text and the script and to the multiple meanings behind every line. There’s an alternate translation she also did that I was able to see performed by a local college troupe around the same time called Antigonick which is a little less traditional approach to both the translation and the retelling but I’d highly recommend reading and seeing both if you’re given the opportunity
I Am Not Batman, by Marco Ramirez: A really lovely one person short play that features a love drum accompaniment. I believe it was featured in a Humana festival a couple years back which was how I discovered it, and I was actually able to direct this show as part of a larger festival of short plays through my high school and it was such a incredible and enlightening experience. The show is really heartfelt and takes a really heart wrenching turn in the second half of the script and I’m so lucky and thankful I was given the opportunity to see it brought to life
you can see I am not Batman performed in Adam driver’s Ted talk about acting!
Horse Girls, by Jenny Rachel Weiner: a truly hysterical dark comedy that I like to describe as: if Heathers was set in a middle school in Florida. It was the last show I did in my high school, and it was a show directed and produced by my peers as part of our senior year final project and it’s one my favorite shows I’ve ever done. It’s so funny and tongue in cheek and surprising and takes a shocking turn in the last fifteen minutes that was always so delightful- I got stabbed in the stomach with a horse statue and got to bleed out onstage every night!
A Midsummer Night’s Dream, by Shakespeare: probably my current favorite Shakespeare, it’s just so funny and interesting and while i do think it’s probably over done I also am delighted with every production and adaptation I see of it
Musicals:
The Sound of Music, Rogers and Hammerstein: I got to co-direct this show my senior year which was something of a dream come true. This is one of my favorite movies of all time and the musical takes some interesting diversions from the film- there are a couple songs that were written for the film, and a few songs that were written out of the film, including two songs by the baroness and Max! You can find the original Broadway cast recording on Broadway that has those original songs and if you’re a big fan of SoM like I am I highly recommend it!! They’re very fun
The 25th Annual Putnam Country Spelling Bee: a little more niche of a Broadway musical, but I got to see it performed locally and it was SO good so funny so sweet and heartfelt highly highly recommend a listen if you haven’t; there’s a song called My Unfortunate Erection and yes it’s as funny as it sounds
In the Heights: probably one of my favorite musicals I’ve ever heard. I’ve never seen it performed but I’m so terribly excited to see the movie when it comes out on hbo and it’s such a beautiful score with such a compelling story behind it
Anastasia: that’s right the beloved 90’s princess movie was made into a Broadway musical and let me just tell you it’s SO GOOD. I got to see this while it was still running on Broadway and it’s so breathtaking please please please please go listen to the obc soundtrack on Spotify
aaaaaaaaaaa okay I think that’s it for now PLEASE let me know if you have any thoughts on these or other plays I miss theatre so badly and would love to talk about plays or performing or theatre!!!
get to know the blogger: send me questions!
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96harmony96 · 4 years ago
Text
Chapter one.
“We should head to a bar and celebrate.”
I wasn’t surprised by my roommate’s emphatic pronouncement. Cary Taylor found excuses to celebrate, no matter how small and inconsequential. I’d always considered it part of his charm. “I’m sure drinking the night before starting a new job is a bad idea.”
“Come on, camila.” Cary sat on our new living room floor amid a half-dozen moving boxes and flashed his winning smile. We’d been unpacking for days, yet he still looked amazing. Leanly built, dark-haired, and green-eyed, Cary was a man who rarely looked anything less than absolutely gorgeous on any day of his life. I might have resented that if he hadn’t been the dearest person on earth to me.
“I’m not talking about a bender,” he insisted. “Just a glass of wine or two. We can hit a happy hour and be in by eight.”
“I don’t know if I’ll make it back in time.” I gestured at my yoga pants and fitted workout tank. “After I time the walk to work, I’m going to hit the gym.”
“Walk fast, work out faster.” Cary’s perfectly executed arched brow made me laugh. I fully expected his million-dollar face to appear on billboards and fashion magazines all over the world one day. No matter his expression, he was a knockout.
“How about tomorrow after work?” I offered as a substitute. “If I make it through the day, that’ll be worth celebrating.”
“Deal. I’m breaking in the new kitchen for dinner.”
“Uh…” Cooking was one of Cary’s joys, but it wasn’t one of his talents. “Great.”
Blowing a wayward strand of hair off his face, he grinned at me. “We’ve got a kitchen most restaurants would kill for. There’s no way to screw up a meal in there.”
Dubious, I headed out with a wave, choosing to avoid a conversation about cooking. Taking the elevator down to the first floor, I smiled at the doorman when he let me out to the street with a flourish.
The moment I stepped outside, the smells and sounds of Manhattan embraced me and invited me to explore. I was not merely across the country from my former home in San Diego, but seemingly worlds away. Two major metropolises—one endlessly temperate and sensually lazy, the other teeming with life and frenetic energy. In my dreams, I’d imagining living in a walkup in Brooklyn, but being a dutiful daughter, I found myself on the Upper West Side instead. If not for Cary living with me, I would’ve been miserably lonely in the sprawling apartment that cost more per month than most people made in a year.
The doorman tipped his hat to me. “Good evening, Miss Cabello. Will you need a cab this evening?”
“No thanks, Paul.” I rocked onto the rounded heels of my fitness shoes. “I’ll be walking.”
He smiled. “It’s cooled down from this afternoon. Should be nice.”
“I’ve been told I should enjoy the June weather before it gets wicked hot.”
“Very good advice, Miss Cabello.”
Stepping out from under the modern glass entrance overhang that somehow meshed with the age of the building and its neighbors, I enjoyed the relative quiet of my tree-lined street before I reached the bustle and flow of traffic on Broadway. One day soon, I hoped to blend right in, but for now I still felt like a fraudulent New Yorker. I had the address and the job, but I was still wary of the subway and had trouble hailing cabs. I tried not to walk around wide-eyed and distracted, but it was hard. There was just so much to see and experience.
The sensory input was astonishing—the smell of vehicle exhaust mixed with food from vendor carts, the shouts of hawkers blended with music from street entertainers, the awe-inspiring range of
faces and styles and accents, the gorgeous architectural wonders…And the cars. Jesus Christ. The frenetic flow of tightly packed cars was unlike anything I’d ever seen anywhere.
There was always an ambulance, patrol car, or fire engine trying to part the flood of yellow taxis with the electronic wail of ear-splitting sirens. I was in awe of the lumbering garbage trucks that navigated tiny one-way streets and the package delivery drivers who braved the bumper-to-bumper traffic while facing rigid deadlines.
Real New Yorkers cruised right through it all, their love for the city as comfortable and familiar as a favorite pair of shoes. They didn’t view the steam billowing from potholes and vents in the sidewalks with romantic delight and they didn’t blink an eye when the ground vibrated beneath their feet as the subway roared by below, while I grinned like an idiot and flexed my toes. New York was a brand new love affair for me. I was starry-eyed and it showed.
So I had to really work at playing it cool as I made my way over to the building where I would be working. As far as my job went, at least, I’d gotten my way. I wanted to make a living based on my own merits and that meant an entry-level position. Starting the next morning, I would be the assistant to Mark Garrity at Waters Field & Leaman, one of the preeminent advertising agencies in the US. My stepfather, mega-financier Richard Stanton, had been annoyed when I took the job, pointing out that if I’d been less prideful I could’ve worked for a friend of his instead and reaped the benefits of that connection.
“You’re as stubborn as your father,” he’d said. “It’ll take him forever to pay off your student loans on a cop’s salary.”
That had been a major fight, with my dad unwilling to back down. “Hell if another man’s gonna pay for my daughter’s education,” Alejandro Cabello had said when Stanton made the offer. I respected that. I suspected Stanton did, too, although he would never admit it. I understood both men’s sides, because I’d fought to pay off the loans myself…and lost. It was a point of pride for my father.
My mother had refused to marry him, but he’d never wavered from his determination to be my dad in every way possible.
Knowing it was pointless to get riled up over old frustrations, I focused on getting to work as quickly as possible. I’d deliberately chosen to clock the short trip during a busy time on a Monday, so I was pleased when I reached the Crossfire Building, which housed Waters Field & Leaman, in less than thirty minutes.
I tipped my head back and followed the line of the building all the way up to the slender ribbon of sky. The Crossfire was seriously impressive, a sleek spire of gleaming sapphire that pierced the clouds. I knew from my previous interviews that the interior on the other side of the ornate copper-framed revolving doors was just as awe-inspiring, with golden-veined marble floors and walls, and brushed aluminum security desk and turnstiles.
I pulled my new ID card out of the inner pocket of my pants and held it up for the two guards in black business suits at the desk. They stopped me anyway, no doubt because I was majorly underdressed, but then they cleared me through. After I completed an elevator ride up to the twentieth floor, I’d have a general time frame for the whole route from door to door. Score.
I was walking toward the bank of elevators when a svelte, beautifully groomed brunette caught her purse on a turnstile and upended it, spilling a deluge of change. Coins rained onto the marble and rolled merrily away, and I watched people dodge the chaos and keep going as if they didn’t see it. I winced in sympathy and crouched to help the woman collect her money, as did one of the guards.
“Thank you,” she said, shooting me a quick harried smile.
I smiled back. “No problem. I’ve been there.”
I’d just squatted to reach a nickel lying near the entrance when I ran into a pair of luxurious black oxfords draped in tailored black slacks. I waited for a beat for the person to move out of my way and when they didn’t, I arched my neck back to allow my line of sight to rise. The custom three-piece suit hit more than a few of my hot buttons, but it was the tall, powerfully lean body inside it that made it sensational. Still, as hot as all that magnificent maleness was, it wasn’t until I reached the person's face that I went down for the count.
Wow. Just…wow. She sank into an elegant crouch directly in front of me. Hit with all that exquisite femininity at eye-level, I could only stare. Stunned.
Then something shifted in the air between us.
As she stared back, she altered…as if a shield slid away from her eyes, revealing a scorching force of will that sucked the air from my lungs. The intense magnetism she exuded grew in strength, becoming a near tangible impression of vibrant and unrelenting power.
Reacting purely on instinct, I shifted backward. And sprawled flat on my ass.
My elbows throbbed from the violent contact with the marble floor, but I scarcely registered the pain. I was too preoccupied with staring, riveted by the woman in front of me. Inky black hair shoulder length framed a breathtaking face. Her bone structure would make a sculptor weep with joy, while a firmly etched mouth, a blade of a nose, and intensely Emerald green eyes made her savagely gorgeous. Those eyes narrowed slightly, her features otherwise schooled into impassivity.
Her dress shirt and suit were both black, but her tie perfectly matched those brilliant irises. Her eyes were shrewd and assessing, and they bored into me. My heartbeat quickened; my lips parted to accommodate faster breaths. she smelled sinfully good. Not cologne. Body wash, maybe. Or shampoo. Whatever it was, it was mouthwatering, as was she.
she held out a hand to me, exposing onyx cufflinks and a very expensive-looking watch.
With a shaky inhalation, I placed my hand in hers. My pulse leaped when her grip tightened. Her touch was electric, sending a shock up my arm that raised the hairs on my nape. she didn’t move for a moment, a frown line marrying the space between arrogantly slashed brows.
“Are you all right?”
Her voice was cultured and smooth, with a rasp that made my stomach flutter. It brought sex to mind. Extraordinary sex. I thought for a moment that she might be able to make me orgasm just by talking long enough.
My lips were dry, so I licked them before answering. “I’m fine.”
she stood with economical grace, pulling me up with her. We maintained eye contact because I was unable to look away. she was younger than I’d assumed at first. Younger than thirty would be my guess, but her eyes were much worldlier. Hard and sharply intelligent.
I felt drawn to her, as if a rope bound my waist and she was slowly, inexorably pulling it.
Blinking out of my semi-daze, I released her. she wasn’t just beautiful; she was…enthralling. she was the kind of woman that made a person want to rip her shirt open and watch the buttons scatter along with her inhibitions. I looked at her in her civilized, urbane, outrageously expensive suit and thought of raw, primal, sheet-clawing fucking.
she bent down and retrieved the ID card I hadn’t realized I’d dropped, freeing me from that provocative gaze. My brain stuttered back into gear.
I was irritated with myself for feeling so awkward while she was so completely self-possessed. And why? Because I was dazzled, damn it.
she glanced up at me and the pose—she's nearly kneeling before me—skewed my equilibrium again. she held my gaze as she rose. “Are you sure you’re alright? You should sit down for a minute.”
My face heated. How lovely to appear awkward and clumsy in front of the most self-assured and graceful woman I’d ever met. “I just lost my balance. I’m okay.”
Looking away, I caught sight of the woman who’d dumped the contents of her purse. She thanked the guard who’d helped her; then turned to approach me, apologizing profusely. I faced her and held out the handful of coins I’d collected, but her gaze snagged on the god in the suit and she promptly forgot me altogether. After a beat, I just reached over and dumped the change into the woman’s bag. Then I risked a glance at the woman again, finding her watching me even as the brunette gushed thank-yous. To her. Not to me, of course, the one who’d actually helped.
I talked over her. “May I have my badge, please?”
she offered it back to me. Although I made an effort to retrieve it without touching her, her fingers brushed mine, sending that charge of awareness into me all over again.
“Thank you,” I muttered before skirting her and pushing out to the street through the revolving door. I paused on the sidewalk, gulping in a breath of New York air redolent with a million different things, some good and some toxic.
There was a sleek black Bentley SUV in front of the building and I saw my reflection in the spotless limo tinted windows. I was flushed and my brown eyes were overly bright. I’d seen that look on my face before—in the bathroom mirror just before I went to bed with a man. It was my I’m-ready-to-fuck look and it had absolutely no business being on my face now.
Christ. Get a grip.
Five minutes with Miss. Dark and Dangerous, and I was filled with an edgy, restless energy. I could still feel the pull of her, the inexplicable urge to go back inside where she was. I could make the argument that I hadn’t finished what I’d come to the Crossfire to do, but I knew I’d kick myself for it later. How many times was I going to make an ass of myself in one day?
“Enough,” I scolded myself under my breath. “Moving on.”
Horns blared as one cab darted in front of another with only inches to spare and then slammed on the brakes as daring pedestrians stepped into the intersection seconds before the light changed. Shouting ensued, a barrage of expletives and hand gestures that didn’t carry real anger behind them. In seconds all the parties would forget the exchange, which was just one beat in the natural tempo of the city.
As I melded into the flow of foot traffic and set off toward the gym, a smile teased my mouth. Ah, New York, I thought, feeling settled again. You rock.
I’d planned on warming up on a treadmill, then capping off the hour with a few of the machines, but when I saw that a beginners’ kickboxing class was about to start, I followed the mass of waiting students into that instead. By the time it was over, I felt more like myself. My muscles quivered with the perfect amount of fatigue and I knew I’d sleep hard when I crashed later.
“You did really well.”
I wiped the sweat off my face with a towel and looked at the young man who spoke to me. Lanky and sleekly muscular, he had keen brown eyes and flawless café au lait skin. His lashes were enviably thick and long, while his head was shaved bald.
“Thank you.” My mouth twisted ruefully. “Pretty obvious it was my first time, huh?”
He grinned and held out his hand. “Parker Smith.”
“Camila Cabello.”
“You have a natural grace, camila. With a little training you could be a literal knockout. In a city like New York, knowing self-defense is imperative.” He gestured over to a corkboard hung on the wall. It was covered in thumbtacked business cards and fliers. Tearing off a flag from the bottom of a fluorescent sheet of paper, he held it out to me. “Ever heard of Krav Maga?”
“In a Jennifer Lopez movie.”
“I teach it, and I’d love to teach you. That’s my website and the number to the studio.”
I admired his approach. It was direct, like his gaze, and his smile was genuine. I’d wondered if he was angling toward a pickup, but he was cool enough about it that I couldn’t be sure.
Parker crossed his arms, which showed off cut biceps. He wore a black sleeveless shirt and long shorts. His Converse sneakers looked comfortably beat up and tribal tattoos peeked up from his collar. “My website has the hours. You should come by and watch, see if it’s for you.”
“I’ll definitely think about it.”
“Do that.” He extended his hand again, and his grip was solid and confident. “I hope to see you.”
The apartment smelled fabulous when I got back home and Adele was crooning soulfully through the surround sound speakers about chasing pavements. I looked across the open floor plan into the kitchen and saw Cary swaying to the music while stirring something on the range. There was an open bottle of wine on the counter and two goblets, one of which was half-filled with red wine.
“Hey,” I called out as I got closer. “Whatcha cooking? And do I have time for a shower first?”
He poured wine into the other goblet and slid it across the breakfast bar to me, his movements practiced and elegant. No one would know from looking at him that he’d spent his childhood bouncing between his drug-addicted mother and foster homes, followed by adolescence in juvenile detention facilities and state-run rehabs. “Pasta with meat sauce. And hold the shower, dinner’s ready. Have fun?”
“Once I got to the gym, yeah.” I pulled out one of the teakwood barstools and sat. I told him about the kickboxing class and Parker Smith. “Wanna go with me?”
“Krav Maga?” Cary shook his head. “That’s hardcore. I’d get all bruised up and that would cost me jobs. But I’ll go with you to check it out, just in case this guy’s a wack.”
I watched him dump the pasta into a waiting colander. “A wack, huh?”
My dad had taught me to read guys pretty well, which was how I’d known the god in the suit was trouble. Regular people offered token smiles when they helped someone, just to make a momentary connection that smoothed the way.
Then again, I hadn’t smiled at him either.
“Baby girl,” Cary said, pulling bowls out of the cupboard, “you’re a sexy, stunning woman. I question any man who doesn’t have the balls to ask you outright for a date.”
I wrinkled my nose at him.
He set a bowl in front of me. It contained tiny tubes of salad noodles covered in a skimpy tomato sauce with lumps of ground beef and peas. “You’ve got something on your mind. What is it?”
Hmm…I caught the handle of the spoon sticking out of the bowl and decided not to comment on the food. “I think I ran into the hottest person on the planet today. Maybe the hottest woman in the history of the world.”
“Oh? I thought that was me. Do tell me more.” Cary stayed on the other side of the counter, preferring to stand and eat.
I watched him take a couple bites of his own concoction before I felt brave enough to try it myself. “Not much to tell, really. I ended up sprawled on my ass in the lobby of the Crossfire and she gave me a hand up.”
“Tall or short? Blond or dark? Built or lean? Eye color?”
I washed down my second bite with some wine. “Tall. Dark. Lean and built. green eyes. Filthy rich, judging by her clothes and accessories. And she was insanely sexy. You know how it is—some hot people don’t make your hormones go crazy, while some unattractive people have massive sex appeal. This woman had it all.”
My belly fluttered as it had when Dark and Dangerous touched me. In my mind, I remembered her breathtaking face with crystal clarity. It should be illegal for a woman to be that mind-blowing. I was still recovering from the frying of my brain cells.
Cary set his elbow on the counter and leaned in, his long bangs covering one vibrant green eye. “So what happened after she helped you up?”
I shrugged. “Nothing.”
“Nothing?”
“I left.”
“What? You didn’t flirt with her?”
I took another bite. Really, the meal wasn’t bad. Or else I was just starving. “she wasn’t the kind of girl you flirt with, Cary.”
“There is no such thing as a girl you can’t flirt with. Even the happily married ones enjoy a little harmless flirtation now and then.”
“There was nothing harmless about this girl,” I said dryly.
“Ah, one of those.” Cary nodded sagely. “Bad boys and girls can be fun, if you don’t get too close.”
Of course he would know; men and women of all ages fell at his feet. Still, he somehow managed to pick the wrong partner every time. He’d dated stalkers, and cheaters, and lovers who threatened to kill themselves over him, and lovers with significant others they didn’t tell him about…Name it, he’d been through it.
“I can’t see this woman ever being fun,” I said. “she was way too intense. Still, I bet she'd be awesome in the sack with all that intensity.”
“Now you’re talking. Forget the real person. Just use ther face in your fantasies and make them perfect there.”
Preferring to get the girl out of my head altogether, I changed the subject. “You have any go-sees tomorrow?”
“Of course.” Cary launched into the details of his schedule, mentioning a jeans advertisement, self-tanner, underwear, and cologne.
I shoved everything else out of my mind and focused on him and his growing success. The demand for Cary Taylor was increasing by the day, and he was building a reputation with photographers and accounts for being both professional and prompt. I was thrilled for him and so proud. He’d come a long way and been through so much.
It wasn’t until after dinner that I noticed the two large gift boxes propped against the side of the sectional sofa.
“What are those?”
“Those,” Cary said, joining me in the living room, “are the ultimate.”
I knew immediately they were from Stanton and my mom. Money was something my mother needed to be happy and I was glad Stanton, husband #3, was not only able to fill that need for her but all her many others as well. I often wished that could be the end of it, but my mom had a difficult time accepting that I didn’t view money the same way she did. “What now?”
He threw his arm around my shoulders, easy enough for him to do because he was taller by five inches. “Don’t be ungrateful. He loves your mom. He loves spoiling your mom, and your mom loves spoiling you. As much as you don’t like it, he doesn’t do it for you. He does it for her.”
Sighing, I conceded his point. “What are they?”
“Glam threads for the advocacy center’s fundraiser dinner on Saturday. A bombshell dress for you and a Brioni tux for me, because buying gifts for me is what he does for you. You’re more tolerant if you have me around to listen to you bitch.”
“Damn straight. Thank God he knows that.”
“Of course he knows. Stanton wouldn’t be a bazillionaire if he didn’t know everything.” Cary caught my hand and tugged me over. “Come on. Take a look.”
I pushed through the revolving door of the Crossfire into the lobby ten minutes before nine the next morning. Wanting to make the best impression on my first day, I’d gone with a simple sheath dress paired with black pumps that I slid on in replacement of my walking shoes on the elevator ride up. My brown hair was twisted up in an artful chignon that resembled a figure eight, courtesy of Cary. I was hair-inept, but he could create styles that were glamorous masterpieces. I wore the small pearl studs my dad had given me as a graduation gift and the Rolex from Stanton and my mother.
I had begun to think I’d put too much care into my appearance, but as I stepped into the lobby I remembered being sprawled across the floor in my workout clothes and I was grateful I didn’t look anything like that graceless girl. The two security guards didn’t seem to put two and two together when I flashed them my ID card on the way to the turnstiles.
Twenty floors later, I was exiting into the vestibule of Waters Field & Leaman. Before me was a wall of bulletproof glass that framed the double-door entrance to the reception area. The receptionist at the crescent-shaped desk saw the badge I held up to the glass. She hit the button that unlocked the doors as I put my ID away.
“Hi, Megumi,” I greeted her when I stepped inside, admiring her cranberry-colored blouse. She was mixed race, a little bit Asian for sure, and very pretty. Her hair was dark and thick, and cut into a sleek bob that was shorter in the back and razor sharp in the front. Her sloe eyes were brown and warm, and her lips were full and naturally pink.
“camila, hi. Mark’s not in yet, but you know where you’re going, right?”
“Absolutely.” With a wave, I took the hallway to the left of the reception desk all the way to the end, where I made another left turn and ended up in a formerly open space now partitioned into cubicles. One was mine and I went straight to it.
I dropped my purse and the bag holding my walking flats into the bottom drawer of my utilitarian metal desk; then booted up my computer. I’d brought a couple of things to personalize my space and I pulled them out. One was a framed collage of three photos—me and Cary on Coronado beach, my mom and Stanton on his yacht in the French Riviera, and my dad on duty in his City of Oceanside, California, police cruiser. The other item was a colorful arrangement of glass flowers that Cary had given me just that morning as a “first day” gift. I tucked it beside the small grouping of photos, and sat back to take in the effect.
“Good morning, Camila.”
I pushed to my feet to face my boss. “Good morning, Mr. Garrity.”
“Call me Mark, please. Come on over to my office.”
I followed him across the strip of hallway, once again thinking that my new boss was very easy to look at with his gleaming dark skin, trim goatee, and laughing brown eyes. Mark had a square jaw and a charmingly crooked smile. He was trim and fit, and he carried himself with a confident poise that inspired trust and respect.
He gestured at one of the two seats in front of his glass and chrome desk, and waited until I sat to settle into his Aeron chair. Against the backdrop of sky and skyscrapers, Mark looked accomplished and powerful. He was, in fact, just a junior account manager and his office was a closet compared to the ones occupied by the directors and executives, but no one could fault the view.
He leaned back and smiled. “Did you get settled into your new apartment?”
I was surprised he remembered, but I appreciated it, too. I’d met him during my second interview and liked him right away.
“For the most part,” I answered. “Still a few stray boxes here and there.”
“You moved from San Diego, right? Nice city, but very different from New York. Do you miss the palm trees?”
“I miss the dry air. The humidity here is taking some getting used to.”
“Wait ’til summer hits.” He smiled. “So…it’s your first day and you’re my first assistant, so we’ll have to figure this out as we go. I’m not used to delegating, but I’m sure I’ll pick it up quick.”
I was instantly at ease. “I’m eager to be delegated to.”
“Having you around is a big step up for me, Camila. I’d like you to be happy working here. Do you drink coffee?”
“Coffee is one of my major food groups.”
“Ah, an assistant after my own heart.” His smile widened. “I’m not going to ask you to fetch coffee for me, but I wouldn’t mind if you helped me figure out how to use the new one-cup coffee brewers they just put in the break rooms.”
I grinned. “No problem.”
“How sad is it that I don’t have anything else for you?” He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. “Why don’t I show you the accounts I’m working on and we’ll go from there?”
The rest of the day passed in a blur. Mark touched bases with two clients and had a long meeting with the creative team working on concept ideas for a trade school. It was a fascinating process seeing firsthand how the various departments picked up the baton from each other to carry a campaign from proposition to fruition. I might’ve stayed late just to get a better feel of the layout of the offices, but my phone rang at ten minutes to five.
“Mark Garrity’s office. Camila Cabello speaking.”
“Get your ass home so we can go out for the drink you rain-checked on yesterday.”
Cary’s mock sternness made me smile. “All right, all right. I’m coming.”
Shutting down my computer, I cleared out. When I reached the bank of elevators, I pulled out my cell to text a quick “on my way” note to Cary. A ding alerted me to which car was stopping on my floor and I moved over to stand in front of it, briefly returning my attention to hitting the send button. When the doors opened, I took a step forward. I glanced up to watch where I was going and green eyes met mine. My breath caught.
The sex god was the lone occupant.
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companionjones · 4 years ago
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Image
Fandom: The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel, and I guess Lenny Bruce?
Pairing: Lenny Bruce x Fem!Reader
Summary: You are a Broadway star in the 1950s. You used to be together with well-known comedian Lenny Bruce, but he left you years ago with little explanation. One night, you run into him when he does a set at a club you visit. Can you convince him to come back to you?
Warnings: Sad reader, the end of a relationship, cursing
Please take some time to sign some BLM petitions! Remember not to give any money to change.org because the money goes to the website, not the cause.
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    1955. So far, you’d been in the game for five years. You’d starred in huge Broadway shows. The people loved you. They all saw the untroubled starlet of the stage. The truth was, you were miserable.
    You met Lenny while you were in rehearsals for Guys and Dolls in 1950. That was back when you were much less known than Lenny. The two of you fell in love, and the relationship was more than marvelous.
    However, both of your careers were growing. In contrast to Lenny’s crass, vulgar image, yours was pure and untouched. Only Lenny seemed to see the problems developing due to the two of you being together.
    He left you in 1953. Your manager framed you to be the hero after getting such an apparent terrible influencer out of your life, but you were devestated. You missed Lenny more than anything.
    So, there you were. Two years later. 1955. You were in rehearsals for a musical called Damn Yankees, and you were exhausted. You’d decided to go to a little hole-in-the-wall club to unwind.
    Suddenly, he was there onstage. You realized you’d been unconsciously looking for him. You frequented lesser known places like that, and it wasn’t only to avoid getting recognized. You wanted to see Lenny. And there he was.
    Lenny noticed you about ten minutes into his set. The lights weren’t too bright, so he was able to spot you in your little corner seat.
    He stopped midway through a sentence. “And it was odd, ‘cause I--uh...I, um...You know what, folks? That’s, uh, actually all I have for you tonight...Um...Make sure to tip your waiters, because that’s where I’ll be after skipping out in the middle of this gig.” Lenny couldn’t get off the stage fast enough. He disappeared behind the curtain.
    Out of shock, you stayed in your seat for a moment. You’d seen Lenny bomb before. You’d seen him bomb many times, actually. But never, not once, did you see Lenny Bruce get nervous on stage. You followed the comedian into an alleyway.
    “Are you running away from me?” you questioned, flabbergasted, when you saw him.
    Cringing, Lenny slowly turned around. He was yards away from you. “Would you be hurt if I said I am?”
    “Yes!” you seethed, “Yes, I would, Lenny, because you’ve been running away from me since I was in fucking Can-Can, and I don’t know why!”
    Lenny cocked his head. “Oh, really? You don’t know why? Little Miss Sunshine of the Stage can’t figure out why the dark and scary comic left her?”
    “No, I can’t,” you pushed back. “Because we were fine! You and me, we were happy. And if I know you at all, you were just as wrecked as I was when you left.”
    To that, Lenny didn’t respond.
    “I miss you so much, Len...Dammit, I wish you would at least come over here and talk to me about this like a normal person.” Tears were starting to sting your eyes.
    He shook his head. “I can’t do that.”
    “Why not?” You were at a complete loss.
    “Because if I come anywhere near you right now, I won’t be able to leave again.”
    Silence filled the air.
    “Why’d you go, Len?” you asked so quietly that, for a moment, you wondered if he heard you.
    Lenny glanced to the ground. “I’m no good for you, Y/n.”
    “You mean, you’re no good for my image,” you corrected, “Who I am to them. We both know I’m a big girl, I can handle my booze better than most of this city, and I can say things that can make the whole Navy blush.”
   Lenny chuckled. Under his breath, he agreed, “Yeah, we both know that.” His eyes were still on the ground when he continued, “But that image, that’s important to you too. That image pays your bills and gives you your dream. It killed me to get in the way of that. I can’t do that to you.”
    “Fucking hell, Lenny. Do you know what you’re saying? Lenny, look at me,” you urged to get his eyes off the ground.
    When he complied, you saw he had tears to match yours.
    “I don’t care about the fucking image. I can change it however I want, and nobody can say shit about it. You know why? Because it’s my image. And if they think they can use that against me and not give me roles because of it, I’ll just grab them by the balls and show them that I can do whatever I want ‘cause I’m the most talented person in this town.”
    He laughed, “You got that right.”
    “So, please,” you begged, “Come back to me.”
    Lenny scoffed as he stood up straight. “You see, we keep talking about your image when you’re the one making me as soft as a rabbit.” Lenny made his way over to you in long strides. When he got to you, he tilted your head up so he could kiss you.
    The kiss was firm, stable. Lenny was telling you he’d never leave you again. As you snaked your hands under his trenchcoat to feel him there in front of you, and as you tugged hard on the lapels of his jacket, you were telling him that you’d never let him go anywhere else again.
    Down at the end of the alleyway, a crowd started to gather. “Is that Y/n L/n and Lenny Bruce?” “Holy shit, I think it is!”
    “And so it begins,” Lenny whispered in a jokingly ominous tone against your lips before pulling you even closer to him.
*******
Author’s Note: Thank you for reading! Fill up that heart and reblog if you liked it! If you would like to read more, I have more fics on The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel’s Lenny Bruce over on my page. You should go check it out. Have a nice day, night, or whatever time it is for you! <3 <3 <3
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jimlingss · 5 years ago
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The Colour of Our Voices [1]
Chapter 1 - Chapter 1.5 OR Chapter 2
➜ Words: 3.3k
➜ Genres: 98% Fluff, 2% Angst, Slice of Life, Broadway!AU
➜ Summary: He wasn’t supposed to hear. He wasn't supposed to know. But the instant Jimin came into your life and pulled the curtains back, you couldn't hide backstage anymore. You were no longer merely a phantom of the opera.
➜ Notes: I’m so excited to finally share this series. I’m pretty satisfied with how it turned out, so get ready for a rollercoaster, y’all.
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The moving truck wakes you.   It’s deafening. You can hear the slow ‘beep, beep, beep’ of the vehicle backing up. With one eye open, you grab your phone to check the time. It’s ten minutes before your alarm.
You begrudgingly rise, getting ready for the day and humming while you brush your teeth to warm up your throat. You change your clothes, then eat cereal in silence at your kitchen counter. Once you’re ready, you leave. But not two steps out your door are you clumsily tripping over a cardboard box.   You make sure not to scream too loudly in case you draw attention. So with a muffled sound and your ankle throbbing at how it was twisted, you stand again.    Someone’s moving in next door.   There are messy boxes littering the hall, the door wide open, and from what you can see inside, the living space is empty. But you don’t dwell, making your own way down the hall to the stairwell.   The timing is poor. By mere seconds, you miss the brunette boy sticking his head out the door with pouty lips and cute eyes, peeking down the hall to catch your retreating form.   You limp to the station and as your shitty luck would have it, the train becomes delayed while you’re squished in the middle cart that’s packed like sweaty sardines. It halts suddenly, everyone jolting and you flinch when someone stomps on your right foot by accident.   There’s no apology.    “Hey, watch it,” the man beside you grumbles and you’re pushed again, at least with your foot free this time and throbbing inside of your worn shoe.   “S-sorry.”   The delay makes you late by the time you arrive in Time Square. You run through the street, shouting more apologies as you dive through the busy crowds and tourist groups. Once you make it to New 42nd Street Studios, you sprint down the stairs to the basement of the building. You nearly trip and tumble downwards to your death, but you catch yourself on the sticky railing.   It’s three minutes past nine o’clock.   “You’re late.”   “I’m sorry.”   “Sorry doesn’t make you earlier.”   The director sighs and rolls his eyes. He turns away from you and claps his hands together, scanning the rest of the bustling crew. “Today’s the day folks! We have dress rehearsal and then the show begins at six sharp! It’s showtime! So let’s get moving. You there, intern, go get coffee. And try not to be late this time.”   “Y-yes, sir.”   Up the stairs you go again. It seems like you’re always running, whether it’s for this job or to this job. But you quickly remind yourself that it’s a privilege to be here. Years ago, you would’ve cried tears of happiness if you knew you’d be on the production team of Phantom of the Opera.   Of course, you would’ve assumed you were performing. But being an intern was good enough. Everyone had to start somewhere.   “Hi, can I get ten americanos, six iced and four hot, three chai tea lattes, four vanilla lattes, three espressos, seven cappuccinos, and a green tea?”   The barista runs the company card into the side of her screen and then her eyes flicker up at you. “Sorry, it keeps saying declined. Do you have another method of payment?”   “O-oh. Sorry about that.” You end up paying out of your own pocket for the drinks. There’s no point in telling the director the company card failed — he’ll find some excuse to pin the blame on you, and it’s a small problem not worth the trouble.   You run back while balancing the plastic bags and cup holders in your hands, trying not to spill any of them. Once arrived, you hand them out to the crew members, actors, and actresses.   “Intern! What’s this?!” The director approaches and sighs. You prepare yourself, already reading that expression on his face. “I said six hot and four iced americanos. You got the order wrong!”   You bow your head. “S-sorry, my apologies.”    “You and your apologies!” His teeth are gritted, face reddened in anger. “Apologies doesn’t make my americano hot does it?!”   “I can go get another one if you need—”   “Don’t waste my time more than you already have.” He waves you off, sighing, and you’re left to drown in the humiliation as the others around you snicker underneath their breaths.    You release the air held in your throat and you narrow your eyes sharply into his backside as he walks away from you. You hold your tongue, reminding yourself that being here is a privilege.   //   The curtains draw.   There’s bated breath held in the audience, a certain sense of anticipation that builds the suspense until everyone’s on the edge of their seats. The lair is shown, mist spiraling on the floor, candles all around. The phantom with his cloak and half-mask sits at the organ.   Christine is enchanted, walking closer towards him slowly like she’s been bewitched by a spell.   The actor recites his lines, and then the music begins.    “Night time sharpens, heightens each sensation.” It’s a baritone voice, rich and seductive, but still sweet. “Darkness wakes and stirs imagination. Silently the senses abandon their defenses.”    The violin strings pull as if echoing after the voice.   You hold the microphone to your lips, singing and pulling the notes from deep in your stomach. The mic has been moved down several pitches to match the baritone vocal range that you wouldn’t be able to reach on your own, but the tone is rich and believable to be of the actor’s.   After all, one of the biggest efforts the director made was to be able to pull this off.   “.....the darkness of the music of the night.” Your eyes are shut, headphones on and you press the left side closer down to your ear, drowning in the lovely instrumental. “Let your mind start a journey to a strange new world. Leave all thoughts of the world you knew before. Let your soul take you where you long to be.”   The note is belted out, streaming out from your lips like silk. And when it’s over, you grin. It’s thrilling, a kind of pride blooming inside your chest that’s rare for you to experience. Even if you’ve done it so many times, it never fails to bring you delight — you’re unable to believe that you actually did it.   Once the song is complete, there’s thunderous applause.   A smile spreads into your cheeks, one that’s infectious but no one sees when you’re hidden behind the curtain. And had you been standing on the stage in the spotlight, you might’ve noticed the brunette boy with pouty lips and cute eyes amidst the crowd.   He’s become enraptured by your voice. He’s enchanted, heart stuttering, speechless beyond words. This was the voice he was waiting for. This was it.   The show eventually comes to a close and everyone holds hands to bow to the audience. You peek out from backstage to watch the curtains being brought down.    “Good job everyone. Nice job crew. Taeyeon, beautiful job as Christine once again. You were lovely, darling. Your sound is like melted caramel.” The director continues with his praises, and the other girls playing more minor roles flock to Taeyeon’s side to also shower her with compliments. The whole gathering parade themselves into the dressing room, brushing right past you. “Oh, yes, there’s the star of our show! Kim Seokjin, you never cease to amaze me! Beautiful job as Phantom!”   “Of course.” Seokjin grins, charismatic and charming as always. “You shouldn’t expect any less of me. With a face like this, how could I ever fail?!”   There’s bellowing laughter that rings and pierces your eardrums. “You’re right!”   You wait as they come closer.   Your breath is held. Maybe today, you did a good enough job that he’ll acknowledge you—   But then the director walks past you like you’re a plant. Wallpaper. A backstage prop.   “I loved that emotion you expressed in the final piece. Almost moved me to tears.”   “I tried to do a different interpretation of it this time…” Their voices fade off and you sigh.   You’re envious. Kim Seokjin has a good face. He can act. He can dance. He has stage presence. He’s magnetizing and charming. But he just can’t sing. The man can’t hold a steady note for the life of him. You suspect he’s tone-deaf.    Understandably, the director couldn’t give up on his godly face, so you became his voice. A ghost singer.   It actually works out well. You don't have to be on stage in the spotlight where every single person can scrutinize you, but your voice can be heard. In a way, it’s like you’re performing. But you can still be comfortable. You just wish you were acknowledged. Even if it’s just a little.   You’re suddenly shocked out of your thoughts when one of the crew members hands you a stick, clearing his throat obnoxiously. “Start sweeping.”   You carry the broom and dustpan, beginning to brush away at the confetti that exploded, clearing the floor of dust and dirt. And you end up missing the boy who sneaks himself backstage, who looks around and slips into the shadows.   He walks down the corridor, luckily finding the dressing rooms and he follows the nameplates until he discovers the one that reads ‘Kim Seokjin’.   The boy knocks three times in rapid succession. He puts on his best smile and tries to push the wrinkles out of his suit jacket that’s too small and worn. The door opens. The laughter tapers off.   Jin’s makeup and fake burnt skin have been removed. What’s left is pure godlike genes, and he’s blinded by the older man’s handsomeness, having to resist the urge to shield his eyes.   “Who are you?”   “M-My name is Park Jimin. I’m a fan, I-I absolutely loved your voice on the show.”   “You want an autograph? Of course you do.”   “Who’s that?” the director calls out, lounging on the sofa and drinking a glass of red wine.   “A fan,” Seokjin turns his head to say, and then he grabs a piece of paper. He makes an enormous signature with permanent marker and several loops in his name. Once finished, he slaps it to Jimin’s chest before the younger can even breathe. “Thanks for your support.”   “Wait. Mr. Kim.” Jimin puts his foot between the door before he can shut it. The actor raises his brow and looks at him. “My dream is to be on Broadway. I know this is a lot to ask of you, but can you please mentor me?”   Jin stares at him and then frowns in annoyance. “Mentor you?”   Jimin quickly adds, “I promise I’ll try my best. I am willing to give up anything and learn and you seem to be the best of the best. I haven’t heard such a great baritone voice like yours in so long. Please accept me as your student.”   There’s an extended silence. “Sorry. I don’t accept students.”   “W-wait. Please!”   “Security!” Seokjin shouts outside the door. “Get him out of here!”   Jimin’s shell-shocked, unable to move when his feet are rooted in the ground. His bones have been frozen. The precious image of his idol that he’s created in his own mind for the past two hours has shattered. He’s left in utter shame and disappointment.   “Hey...you’re not allowed to be here!” One of the crew members suddenly points to him.   And then a hand plops down onto his shoulder, a grip firm and intimidating. Jimin looks up to find a stocky security guard, and he sighs. He drags his own legs, shoulders slumped, escorted out.   //   It takes an hour to help the crew clean up. You assist them in sweeping and putting away the props, all while waiting patiently with your eyes pinned on the entrance of the corridor. You dust your hands off, and you’re lucky with your timing.   The director is walking out with his bag slung over his shoulder, jacket over his arm, busy sipping on some warm tea.   “Director Kang!”   You stop right in front of him and he looks at you in boredom. “Why haven’t you gone home yet, intern?”   You’ve been cleaning up the entire time, but you don’t bother telling him in case he tells you that you’re too slow to complete tasks. You’re too preoccupied anyways, catching your breath. It’s the moment you’ve been waiting for. “D-Director. I know we’ve talked about this before, b-but I really hope you’ll reconsider the referral.”   He sighs, rolls his eyes, and continues walking. You follow beside him frantically while he pulls out his phone to message someone.    “I think I’ve been trying my hardest at this job and I've been putting in a lot of hours. I’ve thought about what you said and your advice and I feel like I’ve improved in my singing, s-so….please give me a referral to an agent.”   All you need is a referral. One measly call and you can be in touch with someone who could expand their hands and help you. You could finally make a break in the industry, make a debut on Broadway. It’s what you’ve been trying to achieve your entire life. It’s your dream. Your goal. The reason you left everything back and home and came all the way here.   But he’s not paying any attention to your desperate pleas.   “Director?”   He’s irritated — you can tell with the way he huffs out. It makes you flinch, but he at least stops. “Intern, don’t make me repeat myself. You need to focus on what you’re doing now. Frankly, you’re not even good at this insignificant job. How are you supposed to achieve big things?”   “B-But…”    “You can’t take big leaps when you can’t even take small steps yet. You’re not ready. Not yet. If I happen to notice that you’re finally putting in some real effort and some hard grind, then I’ll think about it again. But now’s just not the time.”   “I…” You’re at a loss, on the verge of sobbing.   “Now if you’re finished, I have a call to make.”   He presses his phone to his ear, a universal sign that he’s not continuing the conversation. You watch him get into his car, driving away, and you’re left there on the street in a cloud of his gas exhaust.
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Jimin is at a loss.    He paces around in his empty apartment room with still taped boxes scattered everywhere. He doesn’t feel like unpacking and putting away his belongings. Not when his mind was stuck on something else.   He came all the way here to look for a mentor — having followed his community theater director’s instructions to work on his singing. But without a teacher he can’t make his big break.   “What am I going to do now?” he sighs.    Maybe he jumped the gun a little too soon. It was pretty intense of him to go to a show right on the day when he moved in when he probably should’ve gotten settled. But there’s no time to waste when time is of the essence! Maybe he could somehow convince Seokjin to take him as a student. He is pretty insistent and not one to give up just after a single rejection….   Jimin sits on his couch, the only piece of furniture intact in his home, and he folds his hands together. His brows are furrowed, in deep contemplation onto the next step. But then suddenly, he hears a voice.   “—your eyes and surrender to your darkest dreams.” It’s coming from the window. Sweet and melodic. Jimin’s captivated and stands on his feet, following the sound as if he was being gently tugged by a red string tied around his finger. “Purge your thoughts of the life you knew before.”   He steps out barefoot onto his chilly balcony. His eyes are fixed on the balcony beside him, the tiny flower beds that are wilting, the warm lights that pour out from inside the home, how the doors are slightly open to welcome a breeze. “Close your eyes, let your spirit start to soar!”   He hangs onto the note, relishes in how it stirs his very soul, and then rushes out. “And you'll live as you've never lived before....”   Jimin throws his front door open and then pounds onto the door next to his with his fist.   Three beats. One — two — three. And it opens.   He smiles. Then it falls. His line of sight comes a little lower than expected. He was anticipating a man singing, perhaps someone alike to Seokjin, lean and handsome. But instead, it’s a timid girl in pajamas — you.   “H-hello?” you squeak, nervous.   “H-Hi. I...I just….” He taps his ear, trying to explain himself. “I thought I heard…heard....never mind.” Jimin hitches his thumb over his shoulder and awkwardly tilts his body. “I just moved in.”   “Y-Yeah. I saw this morning.”   “So…it’s-uh-nice to meet you, I guess. I mean I don’t guess because it is great to meet you. I swear I’m not usually like this. What I mean is usually I’m not so direct. And, um, bad at speaking. We’ll be neighbors from now on. So I wanted to say hello, since usually, that’s the polite thing to do. Or at least what my mom tells me. She’s great. My mom. But right, I didn’t even tell you my name. My bad. I’m Park Jimin.”    He extends and opens his hand. Then he realizes it’s idiotic for him to shake hands with you. It wasn’t like this was some sort of business transaction. So Jimin lowers his arm….right when you’re opening your palm.    It’s a missed handshake, and he’s cringing so hard, he’s tempted to jump off the balcony. But instead, he musters up stiff laughter and raises his hand to shake yours. He muses how soft your skin is, but tries not to think about it too much in case that’s a weird thought. Which it is.   God, he’s usually not this nervous. It’s a fucking mess.   Yet, you still offer him a polite smile. “I’m Y/N.”   “Nice name. I mean all names are nice, but yours in particular. Not that I mean anything by it. Like it’s quite normal, but not normal in the sense that it’s overused. Not that overused names are a bad thing.” It’s terribly awkward. That blank stare you’re giving him doesn’t help with his perspiration either. Jimin tries to smile to show that he’s not a freak. But it might also be doing the opposite effect. “Well, I should get going now. Lots to unpack.”   “Okay.”   You’re about to close the door, and he steps away. But in the last second, Jimin spins around before you can seal yourself inside.    “Um, were you playing music?”   You’re silent and you blink at him owlishly. “Sorry, I’ll try to keep it down.”   Jimin nods. It’s not exactly what he meant — he wasn’t complaining. But he doesn’t linger to tell you so. He doesn’t want to make you feel tense and he feels like a creep enough. The last thing that Jimin wants is to be kicked out before he’s even fully settled in for being a complete weirdo.   Typically he’s not this socially inept. But he accepts that he’s made a horrible first impression and shuts the door.   Though as he leans on the smooth surface of it, he quirks his head to one side and his brows furrow. Strange. That voice sounded so familiar. And so tangible as if it were here and not a recording.   But he doesn’t dwell, going on about his night.   In the meanwhile, you try to sing quieter.
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stetervault · 5 years ago
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Hello! Do you do rec lists? Would you be willing rec some Steter fics that aren't the most common/popular ones? If not, no worries!
Technically this isn’t a rec-finding blog lol but I do make rec lists sometimes if someone asks and I have the time and I feel like it. Here are some (I think?) less known Steter fics, oldies that people may have missed or forgotten (Idk how well I succeeded, I just picked a bunch that have significantly less reads/bookmarks than the really big fics):
Fear (Doesn't Mean I Can't Fight) by azerblazer
Peter is the damsel in distress, the Sheriff is the hostage, random unnamed hunters are the bad guys.
Stiles has a bat, a hoodie and a willingness to do anything to protect those he's loyal to.
Bring it on.
A Lean and Hungry Look by kototyph
The woods aren't the only place you find wolves.
You're Mine, Valentine by orphan_account
In which Peter decides to court Stiles, and does so by leaving him hearts.
Bloody ones.
Zodiac by Green
"You know, Taurus and Libra make a good match," Peter says with a sly smile.
Stiles looks away. "Yeah. I looked that up, too."
Surviving Peter and the Zombie Apocalypse by Nopennamesleft
Its the end of the world and Stiles has run out of luck. He saves a werewolf from certain death. Will they begin to rely on each other to survive or will the wolf just eat Stiles for a midnight snack?
He Is A Villain By The Devil's Law by neglectedtuesday
Stiles’ lungs are burning, blood is pumping through his veins and he’s pretty sure that if he stops running then he’ll just keel over into the gutter. But God does he feel alive. The sirens are wailing, loud and clear. Just one more block. One more block. Stiles ducks down an alleyway, the bag full of bank notes swinging behind him. It hits his side with a dull thud. The alley smells like cat pee and yesterdays trash so Stiles breathes shallowly through his mouth. He continues walking down it until he reaches the end. It opens out onto the street. He stops just shy of the exit, waiting. He waits a bit more. Then he kicks a can lying idle on the ground. He whips out his burner phone, punching in a number.
“Where the fuck are you?” Stiles growls, “Where’s my goddamn getaway car?”
“Change of plans Stilinski, you’re gonna have to get away on your own. Also ditch the phone.”
Fascinated by lemonstiles, migratoryslashfan
Stiles pontificates over Peter's naked body.
Night-blooming Flowers by imriebelow
Peter always gets what he wants. Stiles learns to live with it.
None of These Things (Are Happening) by Horribibble
After years away, Stiles returns to Beacon Hills just in time to put Isaac's insides back where they belong.
It's cute how people think he's trustworthy.
-
Peter can smell the violence inside him, the urge to do something grand and possibly cataclysmic. It’s there—mixed with a balance and natural calm, but in the undercurrent, it’s there. He has seen things beyond the scope of Beacon Hills’ petty horror show. He has learned things.
The Terrible Things We Do (For Love) by rospeaks
Being a demon, he’s seen some of the pretty nasty things that humans are willing to do for love. Things that, were he still alive (and human), would make him hesitate to be in a relationship with anyone lest his partner start getting some funny ideas. That said—
"This seems a little desperate for a kid your age," he says to Stiles.
Spin, Sweet Clotho by ChuckleVoodoos
Oh, it’s a beautiful thing to watch, the way they dance around each other, spun in sugar and glittering glass. Like a fragile little fairytale, a tender rosebud just waiting to unfurl. It makes Peter sick.
Because love is a fairytale, and his dear darling nephew does not deserve a happy ending.
whisper by tricksterity
Stiles was tired.
He was done of people pushing him and his pack around. They’d already lost so much and he was damned if he’d let them lose anyone else, especially to this psychopath who had no reasons for what he did other than he liked it.
And that’s when the whispers in his mind grew louder.
Remember Darling, All the While by Sang_argente
It was fire, ice, electricity. It was the first kiss, the last kiss, and every kiss inbetween. It was lips parting, tongues sliding, hearts beating.
Impress Me by ToAStranger
Their new English teacher has gone missing.
Falling Upward by moonstalker24
There is nothing quite like flying. There is a calm and a peace found in the sky that cannot be found on earth. All the chaos of the world is below you and there is no sound save that which the propeller makes as the engine turns it. You are free and unfettered and the clouds are close enough to touch; all you need do is stretch out your hand to grasp them.
Stiles takes Peter flying after he gets out of Eichen House.
Sweeter Than Gingerbread by taylorpotato (Stetallison)
The saying goes that lovers who commit suicide together start their next life as twins. Perhaps that's why Stiles and Ally feel the way they do about each other.
The Shadow Effect by Mysenia
What was the fun in being a twin if you couldn't trick a person or two?
Deep under by Sashaya
There's a reason Stiles knows so much about drowning. He'd rather not remember why...
All the World's a Stage (but the light design is subpar) by BonesOfBirdWings
Peter Hale is a successful Off-Broadway actor, and Stiles is a stage lighter who literally falls into his life.
Peter smiled at him. "Thank you, Stiles. But should I take this to mean that you don't want a meatball sandwich from Banh Mi Saigon?"
Stiles' mouth dropped open. "You - I - Yes, I want! Oh my god, you do the best apologies! Can you piss me off more, please? I accept all future apologies enthusiastically!"
Peter chuckled. "I'm sure that won't be a problem, dear boy. I've been informed that I'm an asshole by a very reliable source."
Stiles beamed. "But you have good taste in food, so things balance out?" he ventured.
Peter threw back his head and laughed. Stiles' grin brightened in answer.
The D.C. Backroom Deal by septima_sum
Stiles is a regular prostitute with moderate life goals – until his current client makes him an offer he can’t refuse.
Strange Duet by BelleAmante, thiliart (thilia)
The past three years have been a series of shocking, or not so shocking, successes for 2018 Tony award winner and two time Grammy nominee, Stiles Stilinski. You don’t typically find classically trained opera singers singing alternative folk rock to crowds at Coachella. Nor do you find indie singer/songwriters winning best actor awards at the Tony’s for their Broadway debuts. Stilinski has made it his lifetime habit to defy and exceed all expectations.
-or-
A Steter fic loosely based on Phantom of the Opera
Hold Me Down by sneksonaplane
Waking up in Peter Hale’s bed was weird. Waking up in Peter Hale’s body was even weirder. Stiles had been disoriented and confused when he’d found himself in a plush, king sized bed in an unfamiliar bedroom instead of in his own room (and seriously, why did Peter even need a king sized bed? Why would anyone need a bed that big?) It had all come back to him when he’d glimpsed the body he was inhabiting, one that was shorter but more defined than his own, and older, and kind of hot.
OR
The one where Stiles and Peter swap bodies, Peter relives his adolescence, Stiles suffers, and then suffers a little less when he discovers Peter's fetlife profile where he's listed as a submissive seeking a daddy.
It Was A Dark And Stormy Night by Guede
This is a ghost story. It’s not straightforward.
Put My Faith in Something Unknown by Twisted_Mind
He doesn’t know how long he sits there, suspended between thought and action, unable to feel. At some point, he becomes aware that there’s a hand on his face. A warm palm cradles his jaw, and a thumb brushes across his cheekbone tenderly.
The Rest of Our Lives by mia6363
“I don’t know, as a kid I watched a lot of movies, you know? And at first I figured like… I’d be on some great adventure that would take me away from it all, you know? Like Indiana Jones comes around and is all, ‘Hey Stiles, buddy, come with me we’ve got to go save the world.’ Then… you and… everything happened… then I just… I figured I’d die before I was eighteen.”
Enemy Action by pprfaith
Once is chance, twice is coincidence and three times is far too many bodies on the ground.
Buy Me a New Pair by Julibean19
"I don't practice law much these days."
"And why is that?" Stiles asked, wondering why a handsome and presumably successful lawyer wouldn't want to continue working.
"I've been drawn away by more pleasurable pursuits," Peter said, lips quirked upward as he spoke.
Tale as Old as Time by wynnebat
The one in which Lydia's got better things to do than be Belle, Stiles is a much more likeable Gaston, and Peter is a beast but not quite beastly.
The clothes make the man by FeelingsDusk
The trick to sneaking into a building where you shouldn’t be is to make it seem to all eyes like you should. Stiles has been doing this since he was a little older than toddler and he wanted to get back his Batman action figure from the evidence room in his dad’s Police Station.
(Spolier alert: just like back then, Stiles gets caught.)
Smile Like You Mean It by NinaRooxx
After sulking about the changing weather over the autumn, Stiles notices that despite the weather getting colder, Peter’s wardrobe isn’t changing at all.
Swing by ShippersList
Stiles wants to fly.
Angels, Devils, and Peter by Triangulum
Everyone has an angel on one shoulder and a devil on the other. They give advice, help guide their human through life. They tempt, they listen, they offer help. Everyone has one of each. Everyone except for Stiles.
OR
Stiles and Peter are murder husbands.
love and madness by sinequanon
Peter and Stiles haven’t seen each other in months when the alphas ask them to meet up to look over an abandoned house. Now, they’re going to be seeing a lot of each other for quite a while to come.
Not This Again by RebaK1tten
There's a rumor that the last episode of the show will have Peter getting killed, again. Perhaps to give him a redemption arc or something.
A Light at the (Near) End of the World by ladyoneill
The world he grew up in has ended in a supernatural war that devastated the human population. A survivor, Stiles lives a solitary, quiet life in Wales until there's a knock on his door.
Through Space and Time by MaroonDragon
When Stiles pulls the body of Peter Hale into his ship, he doesn't expect him to be alive. He also doesn't realise he might have gotten more than he bargained for.
His Color by SushiOwl
“Darling, have you been carrying a throw-away comment I made in your mind for almost four months?”
Stiles’s face felt like it was one with fire now.
After You by FlyAwayMeow (rjaejoo)
It’s true that sometimes what you want the most, you can’t have and that you’ll miss what you once had all along when it’s finally gone.
After breaking his engagement to Chris, Peter heads to New York to start over. He meets Stiles, a young author at his publishing house who helps him piece his confidence back together. When tragedy strikes, he discovers how to finally let go of his past and have the family and future he's always wanted with the pieces already in his life.
Looking After You by Slayer_of_Destiny
Can Peter be a chance for Stiles, can Stiles be a second chance for Peter? When Peter offers Stiles a relationship will the younger man take the chance with the werewolf?
Maybe We Both Are by lavenderlotion
The first time Stiles lets his fingers brush against Peter he wasn’t expecting the response he got. They were sitting on Stiles bed researching something. Or, they were researching. Now they were just talking. They did that a lot these days, just talked. They also ate together a lot. Or got coffee.
these words bear my scars (paint your love on my skin) by WindyRein
One day butterflies and childish codes change to I'm sorry you're meant for a murderer and he won't realize for years how much that changed his life.
Before you let go (and the light takes you in) by Issay
Stiles makes one last errand - goes to leave flowers on all the other graves. Fuck, so many graves. The grief is as endless and as inescapable as the sky.
He goes home and there is a thing wearing his father's face, waiting for him in the kitchen.
The Lady of Lightning by kiranightshade
"Those who foolishly sought power by riding the back of the tiger ended up inside"
Can You Use Lube For That? by AlreadyBoss
“You think your what is haunted now?” Surely he'd misheard. There was no way-
“My vibrator,” Stiles answered with alarming sincerity.
Well. He hadn't misheard after all.
Pianist Envy by Bunnywest
Stiles is the piano player.Peter can think of other things he'd like to see those hands do.Shame the guy's straight.
Everything You Deserve by Areiton
You think about it. More than you should, you think about it. About what would have happened, if you had bitten Stiles instead of Scott.
Home by Ragga
Don't be like him, they would say, and then add, or else you get burned.
Unable to bear the whispers any longer, This One left. He forsook those who forsook him, left him bear his scars alone, the scars he bore for his herd. It was better to be alone, stay off the currents, than swim with those most undeserving of his loyalty. So mote it be.
That is, until he met That One.
Lord Peter by Therapeutic_Steter
Peter rung out the rag before gently placing it on his mother’s head, reaching over to feel his father’s equally flushed features.
“Such a good boy,” his mother said, patting his arm with what little strength she had remaining. His father smiled softly at him even as his fell unconscious. Peter pushed back the lump in his throat, smiling shakily for his mother before venturing out into the living space.
knit me together by nezstorm
Peter asks Stiles to stay the night after a really awful day.
Warriors by CinnamonLily
Peter is ten years old when humans discover Azure, a planet not unlike Earth. From there on, he wants to learn everything about their new neighbors and the planet itself. It takes him over twenty years to get to Azure, but when he does, it's so worth it. His anthropologist heart is happy, and a new acquaintance in the form of an Azurian called Stiles might just make the rest of him happy, too.
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jazy3 · 4 years ago
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Grey’s Anatomy Season 17 Predictions - Part 2
I think they might choose to kill or write off Jackson in the upcoming season as the character hasn't had as much to do since April left and his relationships with Maggie and Vic were complete disasters that went nowhere. The majority of fans were not a fan of Maggie and Jackson, myself included, and most people could not care less about Jackson and Vic especially after the devastating loss of Lucas Ripley in Season 2 of Station 19.
Winston was just upped to a main character which means that Maggie will be moving on with him and that they’ve planned that out. They wouldn't have upped him to a main character after one episode if they were planning or putting her back together with Jackson. Jackson has also been spending more time on Station 19 lately between dating Vic and helping Ben out with the PRT mobile surgery truck so it’s possible they could be leaning towards moving him over or writing him off altogether.
It’s also worth noting that Jesse Williams, who plays Jackson, was away for multiple episodes in season 15 and 16 because he was working on other projects and was supposed to be on Broadway at the end of Season 16 before everything was shut down due the pandemic so it’s entirely possible that the actor may have asked to be written off so that he could pursue other projects full time. That being said, all of those other projects are likely now on hold due to COVID-19 so the actor might choose to remain on Grey’s a while longer as a result. I like Jackson as a character so I would be a bit sad if he left.    Which brings us to our final and most likely choice: DeLuca. And not just because I don’t like the character. I think he’s the most likely candidate because at this point the character has just run his course. The writers have rewritten and reinvented his character multiple times and it’s just not working. They’ve done their best, but DeLuca was never intended to be anything more than a side character and suddenly forcing him into the spotlight didn’t change that.
The rewrites and added backstory over the last two seasons were supposed to give the character more depth, but instead they fell flat and as Krista Vernoff herself as outright stated in interviews a large part of that was because the actor played the character very differently than was intended and so the writing came across differently than they had envisioned. At a certain point you have to cut your losses and I think his time may have finally come.
I saw someone on Twitter point out that with Carina moving over to Station 19 full time DeLuca no longer has any meaningful personal connections to any of the other characters on Grey's and I realized that they’re right. Both of his ex-girlfriends, Maggie and Meredith, are moving on with other people and his ex-girlfriend Sam moved to Switzerland to avoid deportation at the end of Season 14. He was friends and roommates with Arizona until she started dating his sister at which point he moved out and while they remained friends afterwards Arizona also exited the show in Season 14 when she relocated to New York.
He ruined his friendship with Link in order to get with Meredith and prior to that he destroyed his friendship with Jo when she went back to Alex and then again when he tried to assault her at Joe’s Bar last season. He was previously close to Amelia when she got diagnosed with her brain tumour and she mentored him in neurosurgery. But he dropped neurosurgery as a speciality after Sam left and they’ve had very little screen time since.
He was friendly with Richard for a while, but that ended when Richard realized he was dating Maggie. They became friendly again after the two of them broke up, but then all of that ended when he started pursuing and then dating Meredith. And that’s it. He's not really close with any of the other characters and the other residents can’t stand him. Bailey and Catherine flat out hate him and half of the Season 16 finale consisted of the other characters talking about how much they hate him both to his face and behind his back.
Andrew and Carina haven’t had much screen time lately and with her moving to Station 19 full time they’ll have even less. I think it’s also worth noting that they’re not that close. There’s also no reason for them to up Hayes to a main character if they’re not planning on having him and Meredith date and end up together as I'm not sure what his storyline would be otherwise as I feel like they've told all the pediatric stories they can with Alex, Arizona, and Addison already.
It’s also worth noting that Hayes was created and introduced as a character while Alex was still on the show. Alex’s departure was a surprise to both the writers and the fans which means Hayes wasn’t created to be a replacement. Having the character be on the show full time only makes sense if the plan is for him to date Meredith. Because otherwise they’re spending a whole bunch of money and time to give us something we already had and that just doesn't make sense. I can also see how writing off DeLuca would have worked at the end of Season 16. In what was supposed to be episode 21 of 25 we saw DeLuca having what looked like a breakdown during which he finally seemed to realize that something was wrong and accept Meredith’s help. My guess is that had they been able to film the rest of Season 16 as planned we would have seen him enter treatment and get better, perhaps with some kind of time jump involved, and return to the hospital only to be killed off in the explosion stemming from the crossover on Station 19. That way the character would have been redeemed and then killed off in a dramatic and shocking fashion. While the explosion storyline won’t be happening as originally planned, they can still carry out this storyline within the first few episodes of Season 17 with a different catastrophe. Or they could choose to write him off by having him undergo treatment and then leave to do a fellowship with Dr. Riley, the diagnostics expert from last season, in California. Or they could have him enter treatment and that’s the last we see of him. With Carina moving to Station 19 that wouldn’t surprise me. I'm also really interested to see how the show handles the COVID-19 pandemic. It’s possible, and I’ve seen people on Twitter speculating about this, that the character death that was supposed to be the result of an explosion might be changed to be a COVID-19 related death to incorporate the pandemic and call attention to how it can take out anyone which if done right could be really interesting. Krista Vernoff said during a podcast recently with the Hollywood Reporter that incorporating the pandemic won’t be all death and despair and that, “There’s joy and fun to be had in people who are quarantining away from the hospital especially for the doctors who, to protect loved ones, crash elsewhere between shifts. As we have seen in real life many of these doctors aren’t going home to their families. They’re getting Airbnbs and living together.”
Which seems to indicate that we’ll see the fictional doctors of Grey Sloan Memorial doing the same. My prediction is that either Meredith’s house will magically expand once again and the entire cast will crash there or we’ll see them all rent a house or an Airbnb together. Which honestly sounds hilarious! Can you imagine Tom and Owen having to share a bathroom?
Krista also said that there are a lot of possible stories to tell due to the fact that so many elective surgeries are being cancelled or postponed right now which means the doctors on Grey’s are going to have to find something else to do with their time. Watching them try to deal with that boredom in contrast to the death barrage of COVID cases should be interesting. So there you have it. Those are my predictions for the new season so far! I can’t wait to see what happens.
Until next time!
Part 1: https://bit.ly/3jtSZVi
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