#i’m on episode 136

[dolly-is-cool]

[on the verge of tears] where is olivier. where is the weather witch. who took them. who is the azure angel. are they okay. where is my person. what does “the light in olivier’s eyes died” mean. are they dead or was that referring to lighting. will they come back or are they permanently in the sky. where are they. are they safe. can they see riot. guys. please.

[yoichichi]

I will die thinking of Komugi and Meruem.

[xmhaoluvr]

HOW THEY BECAME YOUR BOYFRIEND x idol!reader

SHIN JUNGHWAN 신정환

you guys have been dating for a few months now, you guys have met in inkigayo as he was the special mc alongside with one of your members. shinyu was doing well before the interview for your group, but when it came to the time they had to interview your group, he suddenly lost all ability to function; he kept stumbling on words, he kept coughing, he kept dropping his cue card. lucky for him, his co-mc isn’t oblivious to this

“ah, seems like shinyu here is nervous. can you tell us why? do you like one of my members?”

he laughed nervously and just played it off, how? idk. but hey, it’s over now. when ‘cut!’ was shouted, he immediately approached you and asked for your kakao before having a small conversation with you. after that, you guys kept talking and it evolved into something

KIM DOHOON 김도훈

you’re a soloist that debuted before tws. and during their trainee days, dohoon kept listening to your songs and learning your choreos. once he debuted, his first ever post was him dancing to your recent song and it immediately gained attention for how he executed it perfectly didn’t even mascunalized it

as their comeback neared, his members decided to list out idols that they should do a challenge video with and dohoon immediately suggested you. and since he thought of it, they also agreed that dohoon would do the challenge with you if you agree. of course, you did, you were also a fan of them and was excited. it was decided that the location would be at your company’s practice room

the day of the filming of the challenge arrived and now dohoon is on his way with his members to your company. a camera alongside them for [tws:eries]

“ah, i’m so nervous” dohoon whispered out to the camera

“isn’t she your crush, hyung?” kyungmin asked with a teasing smile

“celebrity crush, yeah” he played it off cool and the members all collectively hummed, not convinced

and after all is done, you talked with tws members for a bit, sitting down inside the practice room with snacks nearby

they had spent more time there than they anticipated so it was time to leave. but of course, dohoon won’t leave without your number

CHOI YOUNGJAE 츼영재

you’re one of the newly debuted group under hybe; also the first co-ed group of the said company. tws had come to greet you guys congratulations for your successful debut. the moment youngjae stepped inside, your eyes immediately locked with his and it lingered for a moment before he looked away

however, as the two groups conversed, even when both of you are talking, you two only kept looking at each other and no one else. because of this, you two didn’t notice the knowing glances and the teasing smiles your members shared with his

with permission, tws decided to stay longer and have a chat. you guys sat down in one big circle, you sitting next to youngjae

as time went on, the two of you started having your own conversation. it started with asking the other what their mbti is and it went on and on until you guys started laughing to each other

when it was time for tws to leave, you two exchanged hugs and numbers before going your separate ways but it will definitely not be your last meeting

HAN ZHEN 韩振

weekly idol is hosting another special episode like they did before by hosting an episode with four groups; two ggs and two bgs

although your group hadn’t been selected, tws had been. but it’s okay since you’re one of the hosts

and so filming began, game after game had occurred and they decided to do, once again, the heart meter test where any member of the four groups will make one of the hosts heart beat the highest

kiss of life chose julie, riize chose wonbin, baemon chose pharita, and tws chose hanjin

who did the hosts choose? you of course lol

your heart meter scored 125 with julie, 136 with wonbin, and 128 with pharita

now it was hanjin’s turn, and boy was he nervous. the people before scored such high scores, will he ever be able to beat that?

as he started making his way to you, your smile could be seen and your heart rate increased rapidly

“hey, hey, hey, your heart meter’s going up!” one of the hosts laughed out and pointed at the screen that showed your heart rate, and he was damn right; it was already 132, close to wonbin’s

“wait! he’s so beautiful and i love beautiful things” you confessed and stepped backwards but your co-hosts pushed you closer to hanjin causing your heart rate to go high as well

“hanjin, just smile at her and you’re all good” dohoon joked out and everyone laughed. he did it though, he smiled at you

140 bpm

man, you might die of heart attack at this rate, but as long as it’s hanjin, right?

there’s nothing else he did but stand there, stare at you, and smile. maybe a few words from time to time and holding your hand

hanjin’s final score was 148 bpm, so naturally, tws won

a break commenced after that, dedicated for you lol. hanjin approached you though and made you sweat once again. this time, you guys managed to talk, albeit you stumbling your words. numbers were exchanged before the shooting began once again

HAN JIHOON 한지훈

you’re a trainee under pledis, had been for the last two years. so it should be the time you debut, right? well, not yet, no, not until you finish jihoon’s lesson

he’s been your tutting teacher for a while now, you’ve always had an interest for that topic. so you told the staff, and they gave you jihoon

well, it hasn’t been a smooth ride let’s just say that. you always end up messing up, always getting confused on what the next step is, arms always getting tangle with each other. man, tutting might not be it for you

this time, jihoon is teaching you youngji’s my cat tutting choreography

“do you get it?” he asked, you nodded slowly “let’s try it slowly” he said and you both got into position

“tan, tan tan, darararandan” he said out the beat, thankfully you managed to follow through “should we try it with music?” you nodded, feeling confident and jihoon smiled at this

…

well, that confidence ended up with you on the floor crying and jihoon not knowing what to do

“i’m so sorry, senior” jihoon bit his bottom lip as you said sorry with a quivering voice “i don’t know why i’m so bad at this” you confessed, voice in a shush tone

“hey, it’s okay. you know what? let’s take a break, let’s go out and eat” you looked up at him and saw him smiling

is this a man or an angel? because damn that patience is never ending “is it really okay?” he nodded and you both went out to a nearby convenience store to eat

while eating, you guys conversed, whether it be causal stuff or tutting stuff. in the end, you both decided to end the lesson for the day and meet the next day

however, you texted him when you got home, saying thank you for fetching you home

LEE KYUNGMIN 이경민

you’re an idol who is still in school, who also happens to be in the same grade level as kyungmin and boy was he a such a classmate

he’s the typical guy classmate one could have; rowdy, noisy, and most of all, annoying. he seem to enjoy annoying you most of the time

“[y/n]!” you turned around and saw a flash, indicating your photo got taken. and you didn’t even have to look to know who it is “delete that” “nice, new addition to my album” kyungmin laughed with (han) yujin “you look cute here, [y/n]” yujin added fuel to the fire

you were trying to contain yourself from lashing out so you just plugged in your airpods and continued to study

but kyungmin didn’t like that, so, he took your airpod case and one of your airpods “give me that” you demanded “what if i don’t want to?” “i’ll make you”

the class erupted in ‘ooh’-s after what you had said. kyungmin smirked liking every second of it “oh yeah? how?”

you inched closer to him until your faces are mere centimeters apart. you lunged forward acting like you’re about to kiss him; this made him flinch and let go of both your airpod and the case. you caught it don’t worry “just like that”

the class erupted in chaos after what had happened, yujin trying to lift kyungmin up because his knees gave up on him, gehlee and nana shaking you because that was so crazy. all in all, kyungmin fell madly in love with you

WOW! ANOTHER POST AFTER THE HANJIN ONE

but honestly i didn’t think it would be this long lol. the way it got longer for every member 😭 oh well. i also think this doesn’t align with the title but all is well. i hope you guys enjoyed this!!

MY REQUESTS ARE OPEN!!

[foxdrawdoodles]

The Magnus Archives doodles, MAG 132 to 136

Entombed is probably one of my new favorite episodes now. It was weird to see a sort of softer tone with Daisy, it’s probably the first time that you really hear her scared. It will be interesting to see the change in Daisy’s and Jon’s relationship for the rest of the series.

I’m quite happy with how Annabelle Cane turned out, I still want to try some other ways of showing the “white threads” on the side of her head, maybe try to make them more look like stitching then an actual web design mainly because the person who was describing them didn’t say it looked like webs.

[lurkingindoorways]

I was listening to tma ep 136: the Puppeteer (a web episode, obvi) and what do I see next to me while I’m washing my face? A spider :) not too weird on its own, right? So I take it outside and come back in after I finish the episode, and the next one starts (137: Nemesis), and Gertrude starts talking and says “committed to tape 9th October, 2014” AS IN, TODAY’S DATE. Idk man, two weirdly specific things in a row? It’s Gotta mean something

TL;DR the Web is trying to say something to me, but I’m not sure what

[castielsupernatural]

“i’m afraid indiana isn’t really known for its pagan worship” oh rip community college professor from supernatural episode 1x11 scarecrow you would have loved the 136 page memorandum dropped by the defense attorneys in 2023 in the delphi murder case postulating that their client was probably innocent and being framed by odin worshipping white nationalists

[theresistanceneverquits]

Guide to TMNT media

{A mostly-comprehensive list by a lifelong fan who’s seen/read basically everything tmnt}

Mirage Comics

Original source, black and white

Nice stories, fun visually

Iconic moments

62 issues were published before the og creators passed true series to a different team

TLDR truly entertaining classics for comic fans

1987 cartoon

10 seasons

Created more iconic characters like Bebop and Rocksteady

Gave the turtles their colored bandanas

So fun, so so ridiculously funny this one is a guaranteed laugh every time

Fun voice acting

TLDR such an amusing cartoon if you want something that’ll have you cackling

1990 movies

Darker than the cartoon, but still family-friendly

Fun action, funny comedy

The films slowly go down in quality but they’re all pretty fun

Three films

TLDR iconic part of the franchise that balances a dark and light tone

Urban Legends comics

The grittiest tmnt comic series

Characters lose limbs and turn into cyborgs, etc.

Series was discontinued, but IDW recently brought it back and the story was complete

TLDR good for comic fans who love gritty comics

Next Mutation show

One season, live action

Introduced Venus de Milo, the female turtle

Retconned it so the brothers aren’t blood related so they can have a love triangle with Venus

Has elements of mystic powers

(I’m sorry I only watched the first episode so I can’t give a TLDR)

2003 cartoon

7 seasons + straight-to-dvd film

Follows the Mirage storyline

Darkest tmnt series in tone

Many fans don’t care for the last two seasons after the art style changed and the tone got lighter

Donnie has many excellent episodes, and Leo has an arc centered on ptsd in s4

TLDR has a darker tone and has a good consistent story

2007 film

CGI animation

The writing is meh but overall keeps you entertained

Has the famous Raph vs Leo scene

15-year old animation still holds up

TLDR very fun, has an iconic scene, good for Raph fans

IDW comics

Is currently on issue 136 at the time of this post, longest-running tmnt comic series

The tmnt were reincarnated

Covers a vast variety of characters, villains, and genres

Each turtle gets the spotlight

Standout arc has to be City Fall, with Dark Leo

Added Jennika to the roster a few years ago (she’s the female turtle with the yellow bandana)

TLDR excellent storyline, a lot of reading but honestly you can pick and choose where you want to jump in

2012 cartoon

5 seasons

CGI animated

A good compiling of all the tmnt media that came before

Has moments that are dark and serious, but also has a nice humor side

Has problematic ships

TLDR well-rounded action, drama, comedy and summation of tmnt lore with its own twists

Bayverse films

2 live action films (with cg turtles)

Produced by Michael Bay, very Transformers-esque

Entertaining if you like action movies

Leo kinda sucks tho lol

TLDR fun action movies

Rise of the TMNT

Animated series

2 seasons and a film on Netflix

Reinvented much of the tmnt lore

Raph is the oldest and leader, instead of Leo

Leo goes through a character arc tho

Comedy

The lightest of the tmnt series up until the season finales and the movie (The movie is very dark)

Very fun and dramatic animation

Deals with magic

TLDR beautiful animation, comedic with its own dark moments

Batman vs TMNT film

Animated

Based on the comic

Follows the comic very closely, actually

Fun for both fandoms

TLDR fun takes on the characters, and total fan service (in the most positive sense)

The Last Ronin

Graphic novel

For mature readers

Basically all the tmnt die except for one of them

Good, emotional story, with pretty art

A prequel/sequel is coming out soon

TLDR an emotional darker comic that you can get through pretty quickly

[anniflamma]

Hi! 

I found more stuff of Jonathan from the 1985 king David movie! 

Jonathan is this movie was played by JACK KLAFF, he was most famously in the Star Wars: a new hope as Red four/ John ‘D’. Mark Hamil played Luke in Star Wars and I bring this up because in ‘JOSEPH, THE KING OF DREAMS’ , Mark is the voice actor of Judah. And Judah is David’s ancestor. 

The video links are from the movie:

David slaying Goliath, Jonathan is near the end and also in the background.

(Jonathan’s death is 3:38 to 4:30. David is also in it.)

(Pslam 23, Jonathan is at the beginning)

—

Also one of Jonathan’s descendants has the name Obadiah, and a guy of the same name has a book! I do not know if they’re the same because there are 5 ishmael’s in the Bible, one being Jonathan’s descendant and said Obadiah’s brother. Azel had 6 children, Azel is one of Jonathan’s descendants.

And also there’s a Jonathan in judges 17-18  that scholar’s deduce is Moses’s grandson. I bring this up because he was hired by a guy named Micah. Some rabbi think this Micah was the son of Delilah which makes me assume his dad is Samson and that must’ve had some emotional scars on Delilah if that is so. I know the prince’s psalm had a both Prince Jonathan and a Micah so looks like that paring was actually in the Bible.

And there’s a Jonathan in David’s mighty men! He is Jonathan, of the sons of Jashen but Chronicles replaced him with Jonathan ben Shagee the Hararite. But chronicals also deleted Bathsheba’s father from the list and even changed his name, but Uriah stays, Uriah will always stay. 

Also I think it’s funny that Bathsheba is refereed to as ‘the widow of Uriah’ in the New Testament so David can never live it down. 

I also found this a while ago!

The Bible in living sound

(It kinda gives ‘This is Jesus!’ Or that regular Sunday school stuff but it is almost brutally honest, especially the episode they covered 2 Samuel 21/22.)

Jonathan is in 111to 112 , and 118. 136 is where Mephilobeth is and he outright states that ‘David loved father!’ , so it wasn’t even hidden from the child. 138 is 2 Samuel 11 and David’s manipulation is radiating off him. 

It’s also on Spotify and one of their many albums is Jonathan/King David, I know it was a pairing of certain audios but I think it’s funny knowing ship culture. 

I know I’m super late in answering this, but I just need to say thank you for sharing more David Bible stuff with me. All the tidbits and details are super interesting, and I could eat that up all day long.

[fictionfixations]

where there's a will, we make a way | TMA Fic | Time Travel (Fic Rec)

its. so cool. i dont know what happens in what seasons but tags apparently say like around the middle of s5?? like. i think when hes in his coma (jon)

also oh my god the author put in a shit ton of work?? like so theres a thing where Jon's unable to say his own words, and is stuck saying things from other people's statements, (its literally in the first chapter so no actual spoil) AND THE NOTES INCLUDE WHAT EPISODES HAVE THE DIALOGUE HES USING?? like

im going to give you a part from chapter 8, partly because i really wanted to show you it compiled together instead of just strings of sentences at the beginning:

Growing frantic now, Jon shakes his head vehemently: No, no, no, no, no–

“Then what?”

“…chased me – deceit – follow me” – a skip backwards – “read it – tried to read me back–”  

“Jon, slow down,” Georgie says, sensing his onrush of panic – but he can’t.

“I’ve been tricked into–”  

“–unable to look away–”  

“–there was now a tragedy to it that flowed from the words–”  

“–nothing to do but fall into it – it felt right, like it was all I could do–”  

The words come in a halting staccato, his mind speeding through statement after statement without him like a microfiche machine caught on fast-forward.

“–even as I did so, in the back of my mind I hated myself–”  

“–I didn’t stop, though – didn’t know what to do, and my mind was swimming with – the collective horror of all the things that I had seen and felt–”  

“–I struggled and fought, but it was far stronger than I was, and I could barely keep its jagged teeth from finding my throat–”  

One hand finds his throat now. He can only distantly feel fingernails digging into his skin.

“–‘alien�� might be the best word for that presence – because what it made me feel was–”  

“–something in the back of my mind, a frantic, scuttling terror – didn’t do any good, though – no matter what I might feel about it – choice didn’t even come into it–”  

The Archive was born with a purpose, and it fulfilled its role eagerly, skillfully, instinctively. It felt good, it felt right, and even now, the instinct lingers. He misses it. He craves it. He wants it back. He –

“ –the agony of being opened and remade – to have your who torn bloody from your what, and another crudely lashed into its place–”   

There is a rushing noise in his ears, drowning everything out, and he stumbles –

“–I did what I did because it was what I was supposed to do – I’m not sure I really recognize who I became–”   

see what i mean????? its COOL. scroll down to end notes and you see (for chapter 8) "- SO, [deep breath] Jon's dialogue for Chapter 8 comes from the statements in the following episodes, in order: MAG 057; 125; 029; 138; 159; 161; 143; 143 (again); 135; 027; 088; 148; 114; 114/139; 011; 094; 063; 069; 124; 020; 067; 060; 141; 160; 147; 091; 072/009/007/004; 066/020/010; 106/059; 101; 059; 004; 102; 004; 147; 160; 020; 144; 138; 107; 048/007; 128/138; 126; 062/087/007/139/070/049; 123; 065; 092/145; 086/029; 044/012/049; 137/009/014; 091; 123; 148; 154; 154 (again); 098; 154; 129; 155; 167; 159; 057; 113; 124/057/009/143/011/017/005; 152; 152 (again); 097; 028; 023; 065; 155; 117; 117 (again); 155; 006; 113; 117 (x4); 128; 128 (again); 045/002; 016; 036/109/135; 048; 052/136/090; 124; 069; 098; 133; 058; 140; AAAAND FINALLY: 010." SO COOL???? AND OH MY GOD ALL THAT EFFORT.

[go-to-the-mirror]

Becoming a Fear Entity Avatar in The Magnus Archives, and Trauma

The characters who become monsters – or avatars – in The Magnus Archives also become something else: traumatised. The Magnus Archives, a horror fiction podcast written by Jonathan “Jonny” Sims tackles nuanced topics such as personality change and addiction due to trauma, as well as the perpetuation of the cycle of violence, through the lens of becoming an avatar.

Personality change is hypothesised to be a symptom of trauma, specifically childhood and complex trauma (Rutkowski et al.) (Taycan and Yildirim). Helen is a formerly human character in The Magnus Archives who gave a statement of her supernatural experience to the Magnus Institute but was taken and transformed into the same monster which took her (Sims, “MAG 47”) (Sims, “MAG 101”). Helen is the character with the most drastic change when she becomes a monster, as even the fact that she was ever Helen is called into question, because of the way the Distortion, the creature that she has turned into, functions. Helen’s transformation into monsterhood is directly paralleled, by the Archivist’s. Both she and the Archivist are afraid or are stated to be afraid of what they are becoming and what them becoming means for their identity.

ARCHIVIST. You’re still wearing her face. HELEN. Not this again. I’m not “wearing” anything, Archivist. I am at least as much ‘Helen Richardson’ as you are the ‘Jonathan Sims’ that first joined this Institute. Things change. People change. It happens. ARCHIVIST. We’re not people, though, are we? Not anymore (Sims, “MAG 131”).

This dialogue is after the Archivist chooses to wake up from a six-month coma by sacrificing his humanity. He is having a difficult time coping with his loss of humanity, as evidenced by this quote. Both Helen and the Archivist use different titles to their actual name, the Distortion instead of Helen and the Archivist instead of Jonathan Sims. The Archivist’s acceptance of his title is directly correlated to his monstrosity, as he begins to call himself “Jonathan Sims, the Archivist” in his introductions to reading statements only after he chooses to become a monster (Sims, “MAG 122”). Additionally, he is called only “the Archivist” in the description of episode 142 – an episode mainly about the Archivist’s growing monstrosity – and throughout season 5, when he is much less human than he was in seasons 1 to 4 (Sims, “MAG 142”). In this quote, the Archivist and Helen use their names as shorthand for their identity, and their identity changing as they became monsters.

DAISY. And of course, for John there’s survivor’s guilt in there too. He thinks he’s not human. Makes him very... self-destructive. MARTIN. Yeah, well, we’ve all had trauma. DAISY. And everyone’s changed (Sims, “MAG 142”).

This dialogue takes place during episode 142, immediately after Martin, a main character and the Archivist’s boyfriend from episode 159 and beyond, takes the statement of one of the Archivist’s victims, a woman named Jess Tirrell who was forced to recount her traumatising supernatural experience to him (Sims, “MAG 142”). The Archivist’s friend and former supernaturally influenced corrupt cop, Daisy, has no idea that the Archivist has been hunting for victims. She is discussing the Archivist’s decision to go to a Norwegian town to stop the potential end of the world due to a ritual planned by a cult based there (Sims, “MAG 142”). Martin is worried about the Archivist and does not understand why he repeatedly puts his life in danger for seemingly no credible reason (Sims, “MAG 142”). Daisy explains that the Archivist is suffering from trauma, survivor’s guilt, and a belief that he is not human, which makes him believe he does not deserve to live (Sims, “MAG 136”) (Sims, “MAG 142”). Due to the context of this episode, Daisy is unknowingly referring to the Archivist’s change into the kind of person who would perpetuate the cycle of violence and harm an innocent bystander at a café. The Archivist’s personality changes due to becoming a fear entity avatar are equated with the personality changes that come from the many traumatising events he has experienced. This is most notable in episode 142, when both Daisy and Martin are commenting on the Archivist’s changes, though Daisy’s perspective is of the Archivist’s guilt and feelings of inhumanity, and Martin’s perspective is of his victimisation of innocent people and repeated, unexplained, self-destructive actions.

            Many avatars go through a similar change to the Archivist, beginning their journey to become a monster due to a traumatic event or events. For example, Daisy Tonner – a corrupt detective who killed many, both monsters and people, while working for the police – experienced a traumatic event when she was eleven years old, when her friend was influenced by the supernatural and attacked her (Sims, “MAG 82”). This directly led her to becoming an avatar, as her former friend was the first human she killed (Sims, “MAG 82”). This parallels the Archivist’s reasons for working at the Magnus Institute. The Archivist had an encounter with a giant spider monster when he was eight years old that ended up eating his childhood bully (Sims, “MAG 81”). Trauma is linked to becoming an avatar, connecting to the hypothesis that victims are likely to become victimisers, also known as the cycle of violence. The Magnus Archives also tackles the abuse of power, and how this relates to the cycle of violence. In season 5, the Archivist gains significantly more power over other avatars, and uses this power to kill the avatars who hurt him in previous seasons. At first, Martin encourages this, seeing the Archivist killing avatars as a righteous quest for vengeance, however in episode 174, the Archivist decides not to kill an avatar, who, notably, had not hurt the Archivist, but had hurt Martin (Sims, “MAG 166”) (Sims, “MAG 174”).

ARCHIVIST. I just— This whole... avenging angel thing, I, I'm not… It doesn't feel right. MARTIN. (With a humourless laugh) It seemed to feel right when we were avenging all the wrongs done against you. ARCHIVIST. I-I know. I, I, I know, alright? But well ah—That's kind of the problem; I-I have all this power, and, and I, I want to use it totry to help, but I — (under breath) I don't know — (normal) I mean, I do. (emotional) I-I've done so much damage, and- and anything that might help to balance that is— (composed) But killing other avatars is, is not— I, I don't think it makes anything better. I think it just makes me worse (Sims, “MAG 174”).

This quote is from a conversation between Martin and the Archivist. Martin asks the Archivist to kill Simon Fairchild, an avatar who threatened to throw Martin off a rollercoaster. The Archivist feels guilty over his role in perpetuating the suffering of billions of people and wants to make it up as best he can, however he recognises that making more people suffer is not fixing the situation. Martin is angry as well, and he too is perpetuating the cycle of violence by encouraging the Archivist to take revenge on both the Archivist’s and his victimisers. The Archivist’s acknowledgement of the fact that killing other avatars is repeated back to him in episode 194, where Martin corelates the Archivist’s satisfaction in seeing his victimisers suffer with the desire that the supernatural entity that made him into an avatar, The Eye, gives him to replace the main antagonist of The Magnus Archives in the Panopticon, which would grant him immeasurable power (Sims, “MAG 194”).

MARTIN. I know what it’s like to be powerless. A-and I know you do too. And I also know what it’s like once you get a taste of— wh-when you’re finally able to— ARCHIVIST. That’s not what this is! MARTIN. I’ve been out there with you. I saw the kick you got out of making them scream for once. ARCHIVIST. (Snarky) What happened to “Kill Bill”? MARTIN. You weren’t meant to enjoy it this much! ARCHIVIST. Why won’t you believe me when I say that this isn’t something I want to do? MARTIN. Because I saw your face when we walked into that room! (Despondent) That wasn’t fear, it, it wasn’t even anger. It was envy. And it scared me more than anything else I’ve seen (Sims, “MAG 194”).

This quote takes place during an argument between the Archivist and Martin. The Archivist believes that right course of action is to take his place in the Panopticon and try to make the world fairer to the billions of people he trapped in eternal torment. Martin believes that this desire is borne out of the Archivist’s self-sacrificial, and oftentimes suicidal, tendencies, in addition to his feeling of empowerment when those who have victimised him suffer at his hand. During season 5, the Archivist perpetuates the cycle of violence, due to desires that originate from trauma, and desires that originate from the supernatural entity influencing his mind. These desires are often equated, and it is unknown where one begins and the other ends. This is especially apparent in episode 174 and 194, where both the Archivist and Martin recognise that his revenge on other avatars and desire to take his place in the Panopticon is borne of a desire not to feel powerless or guilty, emotions often seen in trauma survivors.

            The Magnus Archives is influenced by the writer, Jonny Sims’, personal experiences and fears regarding addiction (@jonnywaistcoat). This is apparent in the Archivist’s hunger for statements and its in-text parallels to addiction (Sims, “MAG 107”). The Archivist experiences both supernatural and mundane addiction, relapsing in his smoking addiction in episode 80, and struggling with his addiction to statements in season 3 and 4 (Sims, “MAG 80”).

GEORGIE. So, what? You were just packing this away? ARCHIVIST. Georgie, I just, I needed to do one more. GEORGIE. I asked you not to record them here. ARCHIVIST. I’m sorry, I… I honestly forgot. It’s been a hell of a week (Sims, “MAG 93”).

This quote is from episode 93, where the Archivist and his friend, Georgie, have a confrontation regarding the Archivist’s self-destructive habits and recording statements in Georgie’s home when she asked him not to. Their conversation has parallels to a conversation regarding addiction, with the Archivist stating he “needed” to read one more statement. Self-destructive behaviours, such as risk-taking and substance abuse, are common in trauma survivors and are symptoms of PTSD. Here, the Archivist’s compulsion to record statements is directly related to the traumatising events of the past week and are implicitly connected to addiction. This becomes more explicit in season 4, particularly in episode 147.

So, I thought perhaps I should leave a little something to reassure you that, yes, your actions and your choices have all been your own. Have they been controlled? No more than gravity controls you when you walk, or hunger controls you when you choose your meal. There are certainly new forces, new instincts and desires that influence you and shape your actions. Perhaps you’re unprepared for them, but if you choose to believe in free will, then yes, all you have done has been of your own free will. They have all been your choices (Sims, “MAG 147”).

This quote is from Annabelle Cane, an avatar, in a statement, regarding the Archivist taking statements from innocent bystanders. In this quote, she compares the Archivist’s dependency on statements to a hunger, however it can and has been compared to an addiction due to the Archivist’s compulsion to take statements, and how it feels like it’s out of his control. In her statement, Annabelle states that “addiction is one of the strongest vectors of control there is” (Sims, “MAG 147”). A common stigma around addiction is that it is a choice or a moral failing, and a common result of that stigma is hiding one’s addiction and being afraid to get help (Canada). This is what the Archivist experiences throughout season 4, as he is repeatedly blamed for his choice made under duress to become an avatar, and once his addiction to statements is found out, he blamed and threatened for that as well. The Archivist’s addiction to statements is paralleled to real life ones, in how it affects the Archivist, how the Archivist and those around him view it and how it affects his morality, and its formation because of an experience that can be equated to a traumatic one.

            The Magnus Archives uses the process of becoming an avatar as an allegory for trauma and its effects. It highlights this in many ways, such as personality change because of trauma being compared to the loss of humanity that comes with being a fear entity avatar; the Archivist’s revenge on avatars who hurt him in the past as a way he perpetuates the cycle of violence; and the comparisons between mundane and supernatural addictions, both in how they directly affect the Archivist and his actions, and in how the stigma around it causes him to hide it.

Works Cited

Canada. Health Canada. “Stigma around drug use.” Canada, 2 May 2023, canada.ca/en/health-canada/services/opioids/stigma.html. Accessed 19 June 2023.

@jonnywaistcoat. “Just to say, this episode of Magnus is a lot, so please read the content warnings. A few people have asked, so I'll say that this episode mainly comes from my own experiences with addiction and the fears I associate with it and, like all of season 5, it is about fear, not truth.” Twitter, 18 June 2020, 12:38 p.m., twitter.com/jonnywaistcoat/status/1273656411025784832. Internet Archive, 7 November 2020, web.archive.org/web/20201107031909/https://twitter.com/jonnywaistcoat/status/1273656411025784832. Accessed 19 June 2023.

Rutkowski, Krzysztof, et al. "Effect of trauma onset on personality traits of politically persecuted victims." BMC Psychiatry, vol. 16, no. 149, 17 May 2016. Gale OneFile: Psychology, link.gale.com/apps/doc/A452641704/PPPC?u=ko_k12hs_d73&sid=bookmark-PPPC&xid=a8229ab3. Accessed 13 June 2023.

Sims, Jonathan. “MAG 47 – The New Door.” The Magnus Archives, Episode 47, Rusty Quill, 12 January 2017, play.acast.com/s/themagnusarchives/mag-47-the-new-door. Accessed 13 June 2023.

Sims, Jonathan. “MAG 80 – The Librarian.” The Magnus Archives, Episode 80, Rusty Quill, 31 August 2017, play.acast.com/s/themagnusarchives/mag80-thelibrarian. Accessed 19 June 2023.

Sims, Jonathan. “MAG 81 – A Guest for Mr. Spider.” The Magnus Archives, Episode 81, Rusty Quill, 23 November 2017, play.acast.com/s/themagnusarchives/mag81-aguestformr.spider. Accessed 19 June 2023.

Sims, Jonathan. “MAG 82 – The Eyewitnesses.” The Magnus Archives, Episode 82, Rusty Quill, 30 November 2017, play.acast.com/s/themagnusarchives/mag82-theeyewitnesses. Accessed 19 June 2023.

Sims, Jonathan. “MAG 101 – Another Twist.” The Magnus Archives, Episode 101, Rusty Quill, 17 May 2018, play.acast.com/s/themagnusarchives/mag101-anothertwist. Accessed 13 June 2023.

Sims, Jonathan. “MAG 107 – Third Degree.” The Magnus Archives, Episode 107, Rusty Quill, 28 June 2018, play.acast.com/s/themagnusarchives/mag107-thirddegree. Accessed 19 June 2023.

Sims, Jonathan. “MAG 122 – Zombie.” The Magnus Archives, Episode 122, Rusty Quill, 17 January 2019, play.acast.com/s/themagnusarchives/mag122-zombie. Accessed 14 June 2023.

Sims, Jonathan. “MAG 131 – Flesh.” The Magnus Archives, Episode 131, Rusty Quill, 21 March 2019, play.acast.com/s/themagnusarchives/mag131-flesh. Accessed 14 June 2023.

Sims, Jonathan. “MAG 136 – The Puppeteer.” The Magnus Archives, Episode 136, Rusty Quill, 25 April 2019, play.acast.com/s/themagnusarchives/mag136thepuppetter. Accessed 15 June 2023.

[wandasbiatch]

on episode 136 of one piece, not even a quarter of the way 😭😭😭 but we getting there

idk i’m still saying zoro and luffy are my favs still 🤔

[vestaclinicpod]

Audio Drama Sunday - 8th October ✨

Happy Audio Drama Sunday! I feel like we’re really in spooky season this week with all the horrors on offer from the audio drama community!!

Big old spoilers below!

🌲 @hellofromthehallowoods (136) I looove when stories show escalating tension at the heart of the story through environmental change elsewhere!! And neither Danielle nor Clem knowing if the shaking was normal hurt my heart a little. They’re babies, your honour! I can’t wait for Danielle and Nikignik to chat again 🤞

HFTH does action SO well and the scene with Mort, Creep and Cindy was just masterful. I was cycling in to work but mentally I was right there. I really hope that Cindy’s plan works - I’ll not get into the ethics of utilitarianism here, but I’ll be so sad if her death isn’t ‘worth it’.

But HELL YEAH, let’s get Ralph back! Time to be useful, my man! Don’t fuck it up!

It’s safe to say that I didn’t have ‘Grug saving Diggory from the Phantom Radio Station’ on my end of S3 bingo. It is very interesting to me that they think their purpose is to die. I think it’s actually vital that the grave digger isn’t dead, but maybe that’s just me?

This final arc is such a white knuckle ride!! I can’t wait to see what happens next!

🦀 @thesiltverses (33) We’re all in agreement that Val is absolutely terrifying, right? Right. Good. We’ve heard the noose tighten a little around Faulkner’s throat, but will he be a different man now that he knows Carpenter is alive? I’m so excited to hear this plan fail.

👁️ @malevolentcast (36) The John memory scenes are done SO well because I literally cannot tell if he is lying or not. I usually want to have the upper hand as the listener and it’s so difficult to not know!! I *think* I’m glad that Arthur is trying to make friends but I did immediately assume that Oscar had run off with that book. Maybe this show has given me trust issues…

🌒 @monkeymanproductions Moonbase Theta, Out (Epilogue) SUCH A GOOD AND PERFECT ENDING. Oh MAN. There was so much to unpack here, but everyone seems content with their choices which makes my heart happy and THEY BROUGHT THE GIRLS TO THE MOON 😭😭😭😭😭 thank you, Deej, that is the best thing that could have happened.

🧛‍♂️ @re-dracula I’ve been trying and failing to catch up with the action this week but the early eps have made me feel very strongly that: WE MUST TALK TO EACH OTHER. Evil wins when good people stop communicating. Talk to your loved ones, reach out to people to might be struggling. No issue is too small for the people who love you. Aaand don’t be sexist lol. That is my Dracula related PSA. Thanks for listening!

🥾 @doyoucopypod (12) Do You Copy really do be about grief!! Poor Reese! But it is good to know that they were both rescued! I really can’t wait to get the final pieces of this puzzle and see how it all fits together!

⚓️ What a delight to catch the first episode of @eelerschoice! I knew this show would be right up my street and the first episode did not disappoint! Also, what a CAST! Very much looking forward to hearing more familiar voices!!

Have a good weekend everyone! 🥰 and if you’re the wishing/praying kind, please do shoot off a few desperate ones for amc’s laptop. my wife spilled water on it last night and we’re too scared to turn it on 🥲

[sailermoon]

trying to keep track of how to watch inuyasha cause I’m on episode 42 but apparently there’s a movie that came out after episode 54 and the second movie came out after episode 95 and the third movie after episode 136 and the final movie when the series ends-

[ricciardoe]

“i really felt a sense of relief and contentment when i crossed the line in abu dhabi. i’m looking forward to what’s gonna be a pretty interesting and different year.” daniel on in the fast lane podcast episode 136

[lycanlovingvampyre]

MAG 142 Relisten

Activity on my first listen: mowing the lawn.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, what happened there in the opening title? The recording of "Episode 142" sounds sooo different than the rest of these. Seriously, check it out, compare it to others. Was something different in the recording set-up? Is it just that Jonny didn't fully slip into his episode-title-voice...? Hm...

MARTIN: "Okay, uh, well, uh, yeah, actually; I’m a – I’m a manager. Go on." Hell yeah, fake it till you make it! Martin's made it!

STATEMENT GIVER: "There’s, uh, there’s been… I’m being harassed." MARTIN: "O-kay, um. Just, uh, just let me grab a form. Uh… one second. ... Oh, okay, okay, um… What – Would you mind telling me what happened? Uh, what they did?" STATEMENT GIVER: "He." MARTIN: (sigh) "Did he – Did he look like he hadn’t slept in about a week?" STATEMENT GIVER: "Mhm. Yep, uh" MARTIN: (overlapping) "Right." All Martin needs to know is that it is about harassment and it’s a "he" and Martin already knows who's this about.

"About five years ago, we were doin’ some work under Kentish Town. It was pretty nasty. Do you know what a fatberg is? No – uh – it – Don’t worry; Don’t look it up – Seriously, don’t." *Looking up fatberg* (I google surgeries, injuries and diseases all the time, how bad can it be?) So yeah, it's not gross to look at. There are a lot of pictures with smiling workers in the sewers proudly presenting the biggest fatberg they've found like it a huge fish they just reeled in, it’s actually very cute!

I like how the statement giver is rambling and stuttering, pausing to think and choose the next words. Especially love the stopping and starting differently and stopping again etc. It feels very genuine like a traumatic event that someone recites and it's hard for them. (Also I love the accent^^)

"Look, life went back to normal, I – I was fine. Until – about two weeks ago." That makes this especially shitty... She could have moved on.

"He just… keeps staring at me, like- oh, properly staring, like it is super intense. And, and real… weird? Like he knows me, but I sure as hell do not know him." What did Jon say last episode, "But I know you"...

"He says he works here, at the – the Magnus Institution, and I say what even is that, and he says he wants my story." Why would Jon tell her, that he works here? Jon pulled a few impulsive stunts, but this? I think this was deliberate. He wanted to be stopped because he can't do it on his own. (Also we, the audience, needed an excuse to hear about this, but it works very well for the character!)

"His eyes, like – His eyes were li-like drinking in every fragment of my misery. I can’t – It – (pause) And then it was over. And he looked – He looked at me like he’d just eaten, like, a perfectly cooked steak. You know what he said, he said 'Thank you.'" Very good picture that she paints here.

"And he’s there the whole time, just… watching me. Watching me scream and thrash and – (inhales again) He’s all eyes. He’s all eyes." He’s not all ears, he’s all eyes! xD Also Daisy already said something similar in MAG 136 when they talked about why their shared dreams have stopped. She said "Not of you and your weird eyes."

Speaking of others talking about these dreams. I think this episode was also absolutely necessary for us as audience. We know Jon makes them dream of their encounter with the Fears over and over again and that he's there to watch it. But until this point we never really knew what this meant for the victims. Until this point we have never heard how much those people suffer.

"But I feel like I’m seeing him when I’m awake, as well?" And this is new. Probably gotta do with Jon getting stronger and stronger?

"Every time I do, every time I get that – panic just rising up my throat, I see him. He’s there. Not when I look properly. But just at the edge. The corner of my eye." Remember MAG 74? "Your vision goes strange when you don’t sleep for a long time. I think it’s something to do with changing pressure on your eyeballs. You start to detect faint movements on the edges, on the periphery." For us, in rl this is a normal side effect of sleep deprivation. But here in TMA it's of course more than that.

STATEMENT GIVER: "I, I – I can’t. This place – I – I can’t be here." First that encounter with the Buried. Then Jon Archivist-ing her. And now she's come to the temple of the Eye. She felt it. Like, what Sergeant Walter Heller felt in MAG 53 when he was with Gertrude in the Archives. This intense feeling of being watched.

There is something about this, that people don't think of when it comes to the consequences of giving Jon a statement. Or at least I haven't read it anywhere. Sleep deprivation kills you. Slowly, very slowly, but it does. And for someone who can't go to sleep without having these nightmares, this is probably inevitable. Either by insomnia caused by the fear of going to sleep, or by not getting a restful sleep.

Following up on the consequences of sleep deprivation, I've once read a fanfic about the second half of S4, where everything goes just a bit more wrong. It was very hard to read, but also very good. If anyone's interested, it's this one here, Sinking Feeling: /works/26181109

MARTIN: "I mean, it’s not him, is it. Not – not really." Aarg... do I count this for the not really-counter? The stuttering "not" makes it feel a bit differently... I'll go with it! Not really-counter of S4: 8!

MARTIN: "I – can’t believe he’d choose to do something like that. No, no, I – I can’t think like that, though, I, I can’t let myself, because if, if he’s already gone, then all of this is just –" He's doing it for Jon and him alone. It's always been like this and it will continue to be like this. Martin's vote in MAG 199 is because of that very same reason. He doesn't care about others, probably doesn't care about himself. All he cares about is Jon.

MARTIN: "Mind you, Peter’s not wrong. It really is easier than actually just trying to communicate with people." Yeah... communication is hard, I get it...

DAISY: "Do you mind?" MARTIN: "Can – Can I help you…?" I think Daisy didn't get the memo that Martin is a one-man-show now xD She walks in with such a casualness...

MARTIN: "No one really talks to me anymore." DAISY: "‘Cause they reckon you’re working for the bad guy?" MARTIN: "Pretty much. Don’t you?" DAISY: "Oh, I mean, you’re definitely working for something evil, but – so are we." MARTIN: (inhale) "Yeah. Seems there’s plenty to go around, these days. (pause) It doesn’t bother you?" DAISY: "Didn’t use to." MARTIN: "And now?" DAISY: "Bothers me less than trying to go alone. At least – now it’s on my terms, better than being blackmailed into it." Very interesting conversation about how to come to terms with "doing evil work" or at least being complicit. Motivation, excuses, coping and such.

MARTIN: "It’s alright. Wasn’t you. (he inhales) Not really." Not really-counter of S4: 9!

DAISY: "No, it was. I hate a lot of what I did back then; doesn’t mean I’m not responsible for it, doesn’t mean it wasn’t me." Again, the conversation fits the theme of the episode. Daisy didn't know what was going on with that statement-giver, so it's not the obvious "We're talking about it because we just heard that statement". Martin was just wondering if it's really Jon doing it. And he doesn't want to believe it's actually Jon's choice to hunt down live statements. And here comes Daisy and she tells him the exact opposite. It was her. It was him. There is a reason why people are drawn to certain Fears. They've always did things that fit the theme of that particular Fear. It just gives them power to pursue this even more and it becomes a spiral of getting more wanting more.

Martin is so standoffish this whole time. And he's probably getting more annoyed that Daisy doesn't get the hint.

MARTIN: "I just – For god’s sake, can he not stay safe for like, like ten minutes?" DAISY: "I don’t think that’s an option for him anymore." Oh yeah, that episode was in dire need of a joke. Sadly it's gallows humor...

DAISY: "Not like there’s normal trauma, you know? But it’s pretty common. The most important thing becomes control, engaging on your own terms. Even when it’s stupid or dangerous. Anything to not feel helpless." MARTIN: "Oh, god." DAISY: "And of course, for Jon, there’s survivor’s guilt in there, too. He thinks he’s not human. Makes him very… self-destructive." Thanks Daisy, that's exactly was Martin needed to hear right now xD I wonder if this contributed to shape Martin in a way to say "no" to Jon in MAG 154. Martin didn't really believe Peter, we know that. It's probably one of Martin's daydreams that Jon comes to him and asks him to elope. But after the coffin and now this Martin probably thinks it's just one of Jon's self-destructive rash ideas especially because of the involved eye-gouging... Also yes! Trauma causes you to not feel safe anymore and therefore control becomes such an important part of your survival.

DAISY: "When Basira and I were partners, I’d see this happen sometimes. She can read a situation like no one I know, always seems to know the right move, but for all her research, she never wants to put a plan together. I think she just hates all the… unknowns, the… variables. (sigh) Contingencies. If she spots an advantage, she’ll grab it, and trust herself to figure out the details as she goes." This can go the other way as well though, so the opposite of what Daisy describes Basira to be. It can also result in overthinking and hyper-vigilance, so especially putting a plan together, thinking of all the variables and then plan those through... But I guess that's a bit boring in a story, if the characters just wait and wait, where’s the action in that?

@a-mag-a-day

[a-mag-a-day]

Date: March 6th, 2023

Episode of the day: MAG 136 The Puppeteer

"DAISY: You need to stop moping.

ARCHIVIST: (the picture of Edwardian offense) I what?

DAISY: You need to stop swanning around, being all sad.

ARCHIVIST: I – I’m not swanning around -

DAISY (OVERLAPPING): “Boo-hoo, I’m so alone and a monster.”

ARCHIVIST: I am alone. Martin is –

DAISY: Busy doing paperwork. Not like he’s dead."

MAG 136 transcript

MAG 136 Wiki

MAG 136 on YouTube

TW's can be found in the transcripts

Asks and submissions are open for episode 136! Send your reactions, insights, memes, art, etc., Regarding today's listen or tag this blog in your post.

For more information check out this blog's pinned post.

Enjoy!

Previous episode ||| next episode