#i’m just now watching these i avoided bc i heard how bad they are

[vinnyandthephenomena]

these flowers in the attic lifetime movies are absolutely wild did they even read the books i’m gonna cry

[nickfowlerrr]

for the hope of it all.

pairing: greedy!lee bodecker x curvy!reader

warnings: angst. bit of fluff. mentions of reader x arvin and lee x wife. little flashback to pregnant reader. uhhh, there’s a baby. if i’m missing something important please feel free to let me know.

also lmk if i should tag this as dark!lee please bc i can’t decide if it needs it or not.

words: 3.2k

notes: my first written fic for my writing event. i spun the wheel and got greed and then spun another wheel and got lee and a few hours later here we are lol. please let me know what you think! comments and feedback are so, so appreciated. thank you in advance to everyone who reads and reblogs. 🖤

“Please, Lee. Please,” you whispered, voice breaking on the desperate plea as the stray tear you’d been fighting to keep at bay finally slipped down your cheek.

You were quick to wipe it away, shaking your head and looking away from the gaze of the man before you. The smirk that graced his face was the whole reason you had refused to let yourself cry, despite wanting to break down the moment he’d knocked on your door.

You’d just set Teddy in his crib, watching him a moment as the newborn slept peacefully, his tiny breaths and little movements making your heart clench.

You never knew you could love someone so much until you had him. Despite the pain and all the hardships that you’d faced from the day you met his daddy, as you watched Theodore, you were sure you wouldn’t change any of it if it meant never having had him.

You were pulled from your thoughts when you heard a car pull up the drive. You didn’t check the window, sure you knew who it was already as you went to greet him.

Before you were even halfway down the steps, an unnecessarily loud pounding sounded from the front door.

You were startled for a second, brows furrowing as you rushed down the last few steps to open it before whoever it was could pound again and wake the baby.

You were sure now, though, it definitely wasn’t Arvin. He’d never be so careless to knock that loudly, even if he’d left his key and was locked out.

When you pulled the door open in a bit of a huff, your breath froze in your chest.

As you met the hard blue eyes of the man you’d been avoiding for the past 11 months, you weren’t sure what to do. So, you stayed as you were, blocking his view of the house as you pulled the door more closely to your body and watched him. You wouldn’t speak first. You weren’t sure you could.

“Been a while, darlin’.” He greeted, though his words were cold and stiff, as if he was trying to hold in the anger you could see raging in his eyes.

You swallowed hard. “How can I help you, Sheriff?” you asked, ignoring his comment.

He scoffed as he looked down on you. “That’s how you wanna do this, sugar? Fine,” he said before shoving his way into the house.

You were in shock as he pushed past you, your first instinct to yell at him was held back by the knowledge that your baby was asleep just up the stairs.

“What the hell are you doing? You can’t just barge in here because you’re police,” you nearly seethed as you follow him while he walked further in, going toward the kitchen while he looked around the place.

He spun on you at your words and stopped you in your spot. “Honey, I can do whatever the hell I want. Because I’m the sheriff,” he snarled in your face before he backed up just the slightest. He adjusted his belt as he stood to his full height and licked his teeth, trying to compose himself.

“I’m afraid I’ve got some bad news for you, sweetheart,” he started, your heart dropping instantly. “That boyfriend a’yours seems to have gotten himself into some trouble downtown.”

Your mouth went dry as you stared at him dumbly. “No,” you shook your head. “Arvin wouldn’t do anything to get into any kind of trouble. What are you- what are you talking about?” you tried to stay calm, but the stutter was surely telling enough.

“Down at the shop,” he began, taking his time, seemingly enjoying the sight of your anxiousness written all over your face, “he had some words with Levi. Guess the kid made a comment about his girl. Imagine my surprise to find out that girl was you,” he detoured.

“What happened,” you asked pointedly, all while trying to keep your composure and your voice down.

“Well, Mr. Russell didn’t take too kindly to the things Levi said. Lost his temper. I’ll spare you the details, sweetheart. Long story short, Levi’s up at the hospital. Your little boyfriend is up at the jailhouse, waitin’ for his hearin tomorrow mornin’.”

You felt sick. This wasn’t Arvin’s first time in jail but you remember what he told you last time, the judge said one more strike and he’d be taken to county. Arvin wasn’t a bad man. He was one of the best men you’d ever known. But he did have a bit of a short fuse when it came to defending the people he loved. You’d known that since you were in school together. It was one of the things you’d always admired about him..

The one thing you were confused about right now though, was why in the hell Lee was here telling you this.

“Is he okay?” you asked quietly. The narrowing of Lee’s eyes as he looked at you, and the tick of his jaw at your question had your stomach twisting.

“Aw, ain’t that sweet. Look at you, all worried about him.”

“Lee,” you said.

“He’ll be fine,” he gruffed as he went into your fridge and took one of Arvin’s beers. You were in too much of a stupor to do or say anything about it, though.

As you watched him take a swig, your eyes finally fell on his bloodied knuckles.

You took a step back, as if he’d slapped you, somehow knowing exactly how he'd done that.

“What did you do?” you said, accusingly as you reached out and held onto the wall beside you.

“Told ya' I was surprised to hear the girl he was so concerned with, whose honor he needed to protect so badly, was you. I thought you were long gone, sweetheart. But when your name came up, I knew I’d been wrong. Knew you were somewhere out here. Took a bit to finally get him to tell me where you were, but,” he flexed his hand, “they all break in the end.”

You were seeing red at his words. He'd hurt Arvin, and for what? You couldn't let him do this, couldn't let him get to you so easily.

"You need to leave, Lee. Now. If I wanted you to know where I was, you would've. I told you I wasn't gonna wait around for you. You made your choice. So go," you said firmly as you could manage through your tight throat.

You stayed still as he set the bottle down on the counter, stalking over to you. You only blinked when he was right in front of you as you took a shaky breath in and out.

"My choice was you," he said as he pinned you against the wall, his arms trapping you. But you weren't scared. Just solemn. The hurt that never went away radiating in your soul.

"...No, it wasn't," you refuted, voice quiet as you shook your head, looking him in the eye. "It was the job. It was her. You just wanted me to be your good little whore on the side," you continued, disgusted with him and yourself, thinking about the times you let him touch you. The times you gave yourself to him. You should have known from the beginning. Maybe a part of you always did. The only way you'd get your happily ever after was if Lee chose to give it to you.

Lee Bodecker was a selfish, greedy man. He wanted it all, he didn't want to choose. But he had. Whether he acknowledged it or not, he made his choice. As much as it hurt, you had to accept that it wasn't you.

"You know that ain't fuckin' true," he snarled, holding your chin tightly in his hand as you looked up at him. His voice softened as he looked back at you. "I meant all I said to you, darlin'. I love you," he said as he pressed his forehead to yours. "If you'da just been patient," he breathed hotly, "we'd be together right now. I'da got rid of her, just like I told you I would."

The pain slipping into his voice was like daggers in your heart. You wanted so badly to believe him, but you were always told how gullible you were. Especially with Lee, you'd buy into anything he said if he said it prettily enough.

You had known you had to leave town, get away, or else you'd just run right back to him, or he'd find you and convince you to stay. You told everyone you were leaving, making sure word got around, and it did. He was too preoccupied in his campaign to bother doing anything about it, or maybe he just didn't believe you'd actually go. You weren't sure which it was.

You had enlisted the help of Arvin to assist you in packing, he had always been a good friend to you and wanted to do whatever he could. The last day you were packing away, though, you got another bout of morning sickness in front of him.

It was like Arvin knew before you did that you were pregnant. But he never left. He was there for you. Held you when you cried, assured you everything would be okay as you spilled your heart out to him, telling him everything. Instead of moving out of town like you had planned, you moved in with Arvin.

Time seemed to pass you by so quickly from then on. One day Arvin was holding your hair back for you as you emptied your stomach into his toilet, and the next he was holding your hand as you pushed through tears of pain and heartbreak while you delivered your baby in the next town over.

When the nurse had taken Teddy, you were an inconsolable mess of guilt and heartache. Arvin was right there with you, had been from the very start, but he wasn't Lee.

You were crying because Lee should have been there, should have been the one holding your hand and wiping your tears, you should have told him that you were having his baby. The guilt was crushing. Not only for having kept your pregnancy from him, but because the man who stayed beside you the entire time deserved so much better than a broken girl who was still in love with the man who broke her heart. It wasn't fair to any of you.

And then the nurse came back over, holding a blue swaddled bundle in her arms. You timidly took your baby as she handed him over to you and the second you laid your eyes on him, all thoughts just went away. The only thing you could focus on was this precious little life you held in your arms. And though your tears kept flowing, they were of overwhelming joy as you looked down at your sweet Teddy.

Teddy.

You heard him cry and your eyes went wide as Lee kept his hold on you.

Another cry as you swallowed thickly, sure your face was full of desperation as you surveyed Lee.

His brows furrowed as he looked in the direction of the living room, dropping his hand as he moved closer to the noise.

You scurried past him, stopping him from starting up at the stairs.

"Lee," was all you could manage to say.

He looked at you incredulously. "That a baby cryin' up there?" he asked rigidly.

You couldn't breathe. You didn't know what to do. Your guilt was written clear as day on your face as you pouted at him, watering puppy dog eyes pleading with him, for what you weren't sure.

"I'll say this once, then I'm not gonna be nice about it, darlin'. Either answer me or get outta my way."

Still no words could form on your tongue. When he stepped to get up the stairs, you let him pass you before turning around and quickly following him.

Lee followed the sound of the newborn cries up to the nursery. When he got to the door, you watched as he took a steadying breath before he pushed in, like he was readying himself for the sight he knew he'd be met with.

He walked slowly to the crib where Theodore was laying, crying for attention.

Lee's mouth was agape as he looked down at the baby.

Two pairs of brilliantly blue eyes staring back at one another.

You knew Lee knew instantly, there was no denying it. Teddy was his mini me. He looked exactly like his father.

You watched as Lee carefully reached down and took Teddy in his big arms, holding him safely and smiling down at him as Teddy calmed in his hold.

Your nose was tingling and it took everything in you not to burst into tears at the sight.

"What's his name?" Lee asked in a hushed tone.

"Theodore," you answered just as softly.

Theo's baby garbling had Lee laughing as he cooed down at his son. You swore you could see the gleam in Lee's eyes as he watched him.

After a sniff and a clearing of his throat, Lee's gaze shot back to you. Accusatory and angry, his hurt underlining all of it.

"You had my baby, and were just gonna keep 'im from me?"

"No, no I- I was gonna. Gonna tell you. I wanted to, I just didn't know.." you trailed off, wringing your hands.

"Didn't know what?"

"How," you answered. "Didn't know how to. Didn't know how you'd react. Wasn't entirely sure you'd want to know."

"You think I wouldn't want to know that I have a kid?" he asked harshly. You took a step to him, holding your hand out instinctively to remind him that he had the baby in his arms.

"You're married, Lee. You're holding public office. I know you well enough to know that you don't want anything to mess with that. I don't think having a child with someone other than your wife would be looked on too favorably."

"I told you I'd get rid of her," he said again, lowly. "I will."

"Lee, please," you said, exasperated. "I'm sorry. I am. I should have told you, you had a right to know, but I can't do this with you. That's why I left. I do love you," you said brokenly, "I've never stopped. But I can't live my life just waiting for you to call when you want me. And I won't let you do that to Theo, either. He deserves a father who's around, who puts him as a priority,"

"Oh, and you think he'll have that with Arvin?" he challenged. "I wouldn't be too sure, sweetheart. Those charges really have a way of addin' up. Who knows how long of a sentence he'll be gettin' tomorrow."

You couldn't help but stress at his words. You knew some of what Lee had done before, and you know what he'd be willing to do now, to get his way. If he wanted Arvin put away, there wouldn't be anything you could do to stop it from happening.

You may not have been in love with Arvin, but you did love him. He was your best friend; you don't know what you'd be doing or even where you'd be right now if it weren't for his help and care. He didn't deserve to be punished for your mistakes; you couldn't let that happen.

"Why would you do that?" you asked, hurt lacing your voice. "What do you want from me, Lee?"

"You ain't dumb, honey. You know what I want," he said easily as he rocked Theo lightly while he gripped onto his daddy's finger, his big blue eyes falling closed as he drifted back to his peaceful sleep. Lee's blazing blue orbs met yours once more. "I want you. I want this, all a this with you, and him,” he said, sparing another glance to his baby boy.

“Please, Lee. Please,” you whispered, voice breaking on the desperate plea. "You can’t - He needs something stable. Real."

Lee assessed you for a moment before shaking his head with a slight scoff and a smirk. "This is real, darlin'. I'll give you both what you deserve. I just need a little time, that's all," he said as he set Theo back down in the basinet before turning back to you. "Can't make you my wife while I'm still married, but I'll get that taken care of quick. Then you and the baby can get settled in at home, we can finally be together. Just like we always talked about," he continued, taking your hands in his and pulling you in. "Havin' a family," he brought his hand up to tilt your face up to his, brushing his lips against yours. And you let him.

"And it'll be good for reelection next year, too. People like a family man."

You cringed and pulled away at that. At least you tried to, Lee's hold not let you get far at all.

"Don't be like that, darlin'. Come on, you know it'll be good for all of us. We can be happy," he said as his knuckles brushed your cheek.

The touch reminded you, "What about Arvin?"

"What about 'im?" he asked uninterested.

"You'll let him go," you state, grabbing his hand.

"I will," he agrees, "soon as you two are all moved in with me, I'll make sure he's released. Can't have you trying to run off on me again. I won't let you go so easy this time."

You swallowed back the cry that wanted to be let free as you looked at him. You hated that Arvin would have to suffer while you wait on Lee to keep his word. But what else can you do.

"How long?" you ask brokenly, eyes drifting over to the crib. "I can't do this alone."

"Won't be long, sweetheart. She's already been on her way out. A week, two tops. And you won't be alone. If you think for a minute I'd ever not be around for my child, you're outta your mind. If I’d a known sooner, I,” he cut himself off with a shake of his head. “I'll come over every night, check on ya both. You need somethin', you tell me. I'll show you I can take care'a you two better than that boy ever could."

Sweet words. Always so sweet coming from his lips. Your heart aches, for a million different reasons, as you let Lee come closer, pressing his lips to yours before his arms find their way around your frame.

And just like that, after nearly a year of not giving in to the temptation to see him, he has you once more, so easily. He gets what he wants. Just like he always does. Like he always will. You wonder briefly if it will ever be enough. You're not sure you want to know the answer.

"You've got no idea how much I've missed you, darlin'," he whispers against your lips. "Thought about you every damn day."

You feel the tears as they slip down your cheeks, a wave of relief falling over you under his touch, but the guilt still remains... It's just not enough to make you stop him. Not enough to want him to stop.

And the hope for your promised happily ever after renews in your heart. Because maybe you’ll finally get it, just how you pictured, with Lee by your side, starting your own little family.. It’s all you’ve ever wanted.

Lee Bodecker may be a selfish and greedy man.

But maybe you're no better.

[dellalyra]

Imagine the continue of your latest family formation where reader has high fever and starts crying in her sleep because she's seeing satoru get killed by toji again

The kids getting worried aick because "when did gojo die?!"

And satoru not knowing how it still haunted you even after so many years

A/N: I’m sorry this took so long!! I wanted to think it through but I hope u like it bc I loved writing it!!

CW: hints at ptsd, mentions of blood and canon typical violence and sickness, angst but not really? Soft soft soft soft

Family Formations • Kind

You were tossing and turning in your sleep, fever from the flu still wreaking havoc on your body. Satoru was worried, but luckily, he had Shoko on speed dial – and she would never let anything happen to her precious best friend. You had kicked the sheets off long ago, and the mumbling had started rather funny.

“Satoru you can’t take home a seal from the beach.”

“Megumi let go of Satoru’s hair.”

“Get that stick outta your ass Nanami – you used to smoke blunts on the school roof.”

He was loving it; it was like a free stand-up show!

But then, you started to whimper. He had fallen asleep, and it took some time to rouse him from his slumber but what woke him up was you sobbing in your sleep.

“Please no, please don’t take him from me. Please, not him. Not again. I can’t watch ‘Toru die again, please god NO NO NO NO!” At this point he was kissing your head, whispering your name to wake you from the fever dream, tears in his own eyes because he knew what you were dreaming of.

You gasp awake and bolt upright, wrapping your arms around him.

You stay sobbing in his arms as he consoles you.

“It’s okay, Princess - I’m here. It was just a dream, I’m safe, you’re safe, and the kids are safe. Nothing gonna happen again, okay? He’s gone. Nothing can take me from you again.”

You had been there; you had seen the father of the kid in the next room over. You had heard the burst of the blade through your love’s pale throat, the ivory skin turning crimson red in an instant as he gasped and choked. He had died in your arms. You had screamed and cried and managed to lodge a vine through the shoulder of the man who had done.

But he was here. He fought his way back to you.

You ran your shaking hands over his face and torso – as if checking for injuries.

“I saw it all again, he came back. He had you and he did it again and I couldn’t move and then you were dead again.” You sobbed into his shoulder. He hated seeing you this way, he still had nightmares of the day himself – sometimes the true events, sometimes reversed.

As your breathing steadied, he unwrapped himself from you.

“I’m gonna make you a hot chocolate, okay? I’ll be right back.”

You nodded, sniffing into your Kurama plush.

Satoru opened the door to your room.

And he wasn’t prepared for two wide eyes faces on the other side looking up at him.

“Shit.” He spoke. He knew they’d heard, they’re faces told the whole story.

“You died, papa?” Tsumiki whispered.

Your head perked up at the voice.

“Shit.” You agree.

Megumi’s wide eyes and uneasy stance mirror his sisters.

There was no avoiding this conversation, even at 2am.

Satoru looks at you, you echo his panicked look. Fuck, you two are only 21! How do you explain all this.

“C’mere, come sit on the bed for a minute.” You were past the infectious stage now, so it didn’t matter if they got close. They did as say. Tsumiki crawling up to sit facing you and Megumi dragging his frog plush up to sit beside you. Satoru takes his own side of the bed.

“I’m sorry you guys heard that. I was having a really bad dream which made me feel a bit scared.” You pet their little heads.

“Did you really die?” Megumi pipes up, eyes focused on Satoru.

“Yeah, kid. A long time ago. I got pretty badly hurt and I died for a minute, but I used my technique to bring myself back.” He softly says, and these are the moments that you realise how great a father he really is.

“How did you get hurt?” Tsumiki asks, quietly.

You lock eyes with your boyfriend. They’re too young for the truth right now.

“He got hurt trying to keep a little girl safe.” You add.

They’re silent for a minute.

“Who hurt you?” Megumi asked.

“A really, really strong man. I wasn’t as strong as I am now – and I was tired.” Satoru adds.

Another bout of silence.

“Will the man come back?” Megumi asks again. At this point, there’s fresh tears on your cheeks.

“No, baby. He’s never coming back.” You pet the boy's hair. You’re not going to tell him the man in question was his father, 8 years old is too young for the truth.

“How can, you be sure?” Tsumiki’s voice wavers, and she moves closer to Satoru. She’s worried, you can’t appease her worries by just saying he went away, a grain of truth will do.

“Because he died, sweetheart. He can’t hurt anyone anymore.”

“Are you sure he died? Because Satoru died but he came back.” Megumi questions, ever too smart for his age.

“Hey! I’m unique little man, only the strongest can do that.” He winks, but humour won’t work now.

“We’re sure he died honey.” You nod at the boy.

“How are you sure?” Tsumiki interjects, Jesus you’re getting the fifth degree here at 2am.

You both quiet for a second.

“Because I’m the one who did it, ‘Miki.” He grasped her little hand.

Funnily, that seems to ease both their worries. What these kids have been through, it astounds you – not that you or Satoru had it any easier.

However, it’s a testament to their trust in you both. They know that Satoru would kill for them, and you would too. They feel safest when you two are the ones handling the issues, because they will forever be safe with you both.

“And it makes you sad, because you were there Mama?” Tsumiki asks, petting your hair, as if she’s the one to comfort you.

“I was, angel. I was very scared, and sometimes when bad things happen your brain remembers them, and that’s why sometimes we have nightmares.”

“Were you hurt?” Megumi asks.

“No honey, I was just very scared and very sad. You see, I love Satoru so much that I felt like I was dying too, because of how much my heart hurt. Him and I are made of the same star, and that’s why we love each other so much. So sometimes I get bad dreams of it happening – but I promise you both. We’re all safe now.” You pull all three of them into you, whispering ‘I love you’ to Satoru.

After a minute of family hugging, Satoru leaps up.

“I’ll be right back, 4 cups of hot chocolate with extra cream for Tsumiki, extra cinnamon for Megumi, extra marshmallows for my princess and extra sugar for me!” He does a silly walk out the door to make the kids laugh – well, Tsumiki laughs, Megumi rolls his eyes.

They snuggle in between your pillow and Satoru’s.

“Does everyone get someone made of the same star, mama?” Megumi asks.

You smile at him.

“Some people get lots of people, some people get friends, some get boyfriends or girlfriends. There’s matches out there for everyone, in all ways. Some people know them forever, some people only meet when they’re really old. Your papa and I were lucky to reunite when we were so young.” You muse.

“I hope mine is a Prince, or a handsome King!” Tsumiki says.

“You’d make a great Queen, ‘Miki.” You giggle with her.

“I hope mine is kind.” Megumi quietly muses. Your sweet soft boy, so much more sensitive than he pretends.

The other half of your star walks back in at that moment, holding a tray of mugs – steaming and overflowing with cocoa.

You all curl up in your California King Bed that night, you and Satoru holding hands over the heads of the kids between you – Tsumiki by Satoru, and Megumi by you. You lock eyes and smile as they both fall asleep.

“Goodnight, Princess.”

“Goodnight, ‘Toru.”

7 years later, Megumi’s other half of his star came barrelling into his life, all smiles and pink hair and chaos – but as he had hoped, completely and utterly kind.

Recommended Listening:

Matilda - Harry Styles

[mystic-writings]

emergency contact | jack hodgins

pairing — jack hodgins x fem!booth!reader

summary — hodgins hasn’t heard from you in over six months, after you broke up with him and disappeared. until he gets an alarming phone call in the middle of the night

warnings — angst, canon-typical violence, mentions of death

word count — 2,528

notes — a few things: i wrote this back in january, and it was rushed and poorly done but im being self-indulgent for this one | also im not tagging anyone bc i wanna see how far this will get on its own (except for my beloved @shmaptainwrites who indulged me ily mimi)

masterlist | navigation

2:47am

Despite his many years working for the Jeffersonian, Hodgins had yet to get used to his phone ringing at odd hours. With a groan and a stretch, his palm landed where his phone lay on the nightstand table. Without checking the caller ID, he picked up the phone and slurred out a tired greeting to the caller on the other line.

“Hello, Dr. Hodgins, I’m Marie, calling from the George Washington University Hospital.” Why was a hospital calling him so late at night? “You’re listed as the emergency contact for Y/n Booth, correct?”

Your name sent a shock through Jack’s body. “I— I guess so, yeah. Why? Is she okay?”

“Your fiancée was shot on duty, sir. She’s in surgery right now. We suggest you be with her when she wakes up.”

Without a second thought, Jack hung up the phone and flung out of bed. He didn’t care how things ended between the two of you, good or bad, but he knew one thing for certain: he needed to make sure you were okay. After scrambling for a decent set of clothing and his car keys, Jack rushed out of the house and down the near-empty streets to the hospital you were taken to. 

Even though his mind was running at a mile a minute, Jack managed to recall what the nurse had told him. Shot on duty. You took a sabbatical seven months ago, were you back in town? Surely Booth must’ve known, he was your brother and co-worker, he had to have. Did he spare telling Jack to avoid the inevitable turmoil? Obviously you’d been back long enough to take a case, so it wasn’t like you had decided to come back out of the blue. 

By the time he found parking, it was half past 3 in the morning, and Jack’s heart refused to stop beating out of his chest, his palms sweating rivers as he clenched and unclenched them. Despite all of this, though, he approached the front desk with a cracking resolve, trying his best to be put together for the sake of not distressing the night staff and lingering patient family members. 

“Could you tell me where Y/n Booth is?”

The nurse behind the counter glanced up at him. “Connection to the patient?”

“I’m her-” he stumbled on the words. “Her, uh, fiancé. Emergency contact.” 

She typed a few things into the computer when a voice from behind caught Jack’s attention. 

“Hodgins.” Booth called, approaching with a weary face and a cup of likely burnt coffee.

Jack nearly sprinted over to the man, blue eyes frantically searching for answers in his features. “What’s up, man? I mean, what the hell happened?”

Booth took Hodgins by the arm and led him down a hallway, over to the elevators. “We were going after a perp. I told her not to go in first, that I’d handle the hard part. She didn’t listen, the bastard got her from behind, shot out one of her kidneys. Been in surgery for almost,” he checked his watch, “three hours now.” 

Jack deflated just as the elevator doors dinged open. The pair stepped inside, the space empty apart from themselves. “I just— I don’t get it. Yesterday, she was somewhere even I didn’t know, taking some damn sabbatical. Yesterday, I was still pissed at her. Now? She’s in surgery because she was on a case. Because some asshole shot her. I mean, what the hell am I supposed to do with that, Booth?”

Unable to provide any kind of emotional support or response, Booth remained quiet as his friend tried his best not to break down in the elevator. 

When the doors opened, Jack attempted to regain his composure as best as he could while Booth led him down the hall. There was a separate waiting room here, for family members who had someone in surgery. He sat opposite Booth, next to a sleeping little girl and her obviously exhausted mother. 

He had no bearing of the passage of time, and felt as though there was no energy left within him to check the watch on his wrist. All he did was sit with his hands on his knees, head tilted to the sky, one leg bouncing like an infinite rubber ball. At some point, a doctor came out to notify the mother of her husband’s successful surgery — his tumor was gone, he’d told her, and there was little chance of it coming back. 

It wasn’t until the sun started to peek in through the waiting room windows that a surgeon called out your name. Booth had been asleep in the chair across from Jack, but he was wide awake. The pair jumped up and approached the doctor, throwing questions at him rapidly. 

“Y/n is okay. Surgery went well, though we’ll have to keep her here for longer than expected.”

“Why? What happened?” Booth asked. 

The doctor sighed. “Due to the location of the entry wound, the bullet caused too much damage to her right kidney. For now, she’ll only be functioning with one until we can find a donor match. She’ll be on dialysis weekly and some medication to assist the working kidney, but otherwise, she’ll be just fine in a week or so. The bullet did puncture the liver and small intestine, but the speed of the bullet slowed enough to only cause minor damage, nothing we couldn’t fix up.” He told them, and a wave of relief crashed over the pair. “She’s being brought up to her room now, if you’d like to go wait with her.”

Jack only nodded, Booth trailing him as the doctor led them up one more floor, where you were being transferred to the ICU. It was painful, seeing you after so  long, only for you to be hooked up to so many machines, laying nearly helpless in a bed. He pulled a chair up to your right side, reaching for your limp hand to hold, hoping you could feel him. 

Hoping you knew he was there. That you knew he always would be.

Booth leaned against the door frame, watching everything with anguish. After you left for California, you kept in constant contact with your older brother. But even in those months, you never explained why you broke off the engagement so suddenly. Why you took a surprise sabbatical, why you went to California specifically. Why you became so closed off, so cold to everyone, even to Parker. 

After a while, Booth left Jack alone to go pick up Parker from his mother’s house. He promised to be back later, your nephew in tow, and pressed a featherlight kiss to your forehead before he left. 

Jack, swimming in an ocean’s worth of thought, barely noticed the sun coming over the horizon in the window opposite him. All he could do was process the emotions flowing through him. Anger, that you left him so suddenly and without explanation. Despair, that you’d come back so long ago and didn’t come to see him, to work things out. Worry, that despite your life-saving surgery, you wouldn’t get a new kidney, or that you’d never be the same again. Anger again, but at the bastard who shot you. Triumph, that he was rotting in a cell right now. 

 Jack’s only comfort in the sterile, whitewashed room was the steady beeping emanating from the heart monitor, a small assurance that you were okay. His hand remained clasped over yours for hours, thumb stroking the smooth skin on the back of your hand. Partly as a comfort to himself that you were still there, but mostly, he believed, a comfort to you. He hoped you could feel it; that you could feel his presence. He hoped his presence comforted you. 

By the time you woke up, all the worry had faded from Jack’s body and exhaustion had taken its place. He was asleep, head supported by his arm on the side of the chair, when he heard the sheets rustle in the bed. 

Somehow, in all your years of work, this was the first time you ended up in the hospital due to a job-related injury. It wasn’t the first time you woke up dazed after a surgery with little memory of how you got there, though. 

The sheets, despite being thin, weighed down your legs and torso, providing warmth and comfort. You could feel the leads for the heart monitor stuck to your chest, irritating your skin in the slightest bit. There was a cannula feeding oxygen into your system, though it rubbed the skin on the back of your ears uncomfortably. The main thing, though, was that your torso hurt. 

Despite that, you managed to notice something weighing down your right hand. It was warm, warmer than the blankets. And heavier. Garnering the courage to open your eyes, you blinked to adjust to the sunlight and fluorescent lights, trying to shift yourself upward, wincing when it pulled on your wound. Instead, you glanced over at your hand, only to find another on top of it. Following the arm connected to it, your heart stuttered and cracked when you found a sleeping Hodgins sitting next to your bed. Emotion swelled within your chest and tear ducts just at the sight of him, sleeping so peacefully next to you, his hand over yours in a firm grasp, as if that was the only thing that assured him that you were really here. 

Slowly, quietly, you tried to pull your hand out from under Jack’s, only for the movement to wake him up. He stretched with a deep inhale, blinking rapidly as he took in his surroundings. It wasn’t until he noticed you were awake that he seemed to come to his senses. 

“Hey,” he nearly whispered. “How’re you feeling?”

You bit back a scoff. “Terrible. First job back and of course I had to get myself shot.” 

Jack fought a smile, scooting forward to raise the bed up for you to sit properly. “They said they got all the fragments of the bullet during surgery. You’re down a kidney for now, though.”

You only nodded, allowing yourself some time to gather your thoughts. “Why are you here, Hodgins?”

“Apparently, I’m still your emergency contact.” He told you, sitting back down and resting his elbows on his knees. “And apparently, I still care about you enough to show up.” 

“Don’t put that on me.” You whispered, chest restricting as tears fought their way back to your waterline. “You can’t say that to me. Not after what I did to you. You should hate me. I mean, really hate me. Like, praying for my downfall, kind of hate. You shouldn’t still care about me.”

“Well, apparently I do. I thought I hated you, for a long time. But I guess I don’t.” Jack sighed,  taking your hand. You wanted to protest, to pull away, but you let him. “I guess this was a wakeup call for me. Literally. They called me at 3 in the morning to tell me you were in surgery.”

You laughed, a wet sound underlined with sadness. “I’m sorry, Jack. Really, I am. I just…”

“What, don’t love me? It’s okay. I’ve learned to live with it.” 

Even when he should hate you, Jack still understood, and even worse, he still loved you. He was, somehow, the world’s most understanding man. God, you love him. 

“No, no I don’t hate you. Actually, it’s the opposite. I just wish things could’ve gone differently.” 

Now Jack was just confused. “What d’you mean? You broke up with me for a reason, right? You told me you didn’t love me anymore.”

“It’s too complicated, Jack. I want to explain it all to you, really, but it’s not safe. I don’t know if or when it will be, and I won’t blame you if you want to find someone else, or if you already have. You deserve to be happy, Jack. You should move on from me.” 

“I don’t want anyone else.” Jack said, emphasizing each word and squeezing your hand. “I just want you. From the moment I met you, I knew you were it for me, Y/n. Even with your brother breathing down my neck to not even think about pursuing our relationship. It was terrifying, but I ignored it. Because you were too important to have in my life. I couldn’t risk passing you up. I just don’t understand why you ended things so suddenly.”

The tears that you had been attempting to keep at bay for this entire conversation now flowed freely down your cheeks, the emotions you’d kept close to your chest for nearly a year now breaking free. Jack, like the gentleman he was, gently tilted your head toward him, reaching up and using the pads of his thumbs to brush them from your cheeks. 

“I’m sorry,” you whimpered, daring to look him in the eye. 

“Don’t be.” He whispered. 

“I have to be. I hurt you. I ruined everything. And it wasn’t even worth it. It  didn’t change anything.”

Despite his confusion, Jack said nothing. He simply stood to his full height and sat on the edge of the bed, pulling you into his chest — minding your wounds and stroking your hair. “It’s okay. You’re home now. We can fix this.”

“No we can’t.” You shook your head, looking up at him. “Jack, there’s nothing left to fix. Because if we fix it, you’ll die.” 

After what felt like an eternity of swirling, spiraling thoughts, Jack found his voice. “What?”

“That’s why I left.” You said. “I was ordered to. I was working on a case, some underground organized crime syndicate. I found out some stuff I shouldn’t have. My hands were tied, I had no choice.” Choking back a sob, you wiped the tears from your face and took a breath. “It was either break up with you, call off the wedding, and leave, or everyone I loved would die. They were gonna kill you, kill Seeley and Parker, and drain your accounts. There was nothing I could do.” 

Jack pulled you in tighter, his whole worldview shifting and turning on an axis. He couldn’t speak — hell, he could barely even think right now. Jack had spent months grieving your relationship, questioning why you broke things off, harboring a ruthless anger at what his life had become, and all of it faded to dust in an instant. 

“I don’t know what to do,” you whispered, pulling Jack back to the present. “I work with these people, Jack. They could ruin me in an instant.” 

“We’ll fix this, I promise.” Jack declared, and despite the fear that had overridden your senses for the past few months, you couldn’t help but believe him. 

You only nodded, curling further into him as best as you could with your incisions. Fidgeting with the strings of his hoodie, you listened to the beat of his heart beneath you and took a deep breath. 

Soon enough, you were drifting off to sleep with the firm belief that soon enough, with the help of your family, somehow, everything would be okay. 

if you want more jack fics, please feel free to comment and let me know!! writing for smaller characters is always a gamble but if people read this i’d be more than happy to do so!

[elsweetheart]

no bc.. the way u write ellie but esp dealer! ellie.. pls i need something ab her meeting shy! reader for the first time. like imagine reader at a party and she doesn't smoke and ellie notices her and shes just like.. yep shes mine. aka dealer! ellie becoming fixated on a girl she sees

hello dealer!ellie inspo 😻 drugs + alcohol mentions below

this is almost like a prequel to the first dealer!ellie hcs i wrote ? it was briefly mentioned they had a few interactions so this is just the first one they ever had :)

have to have you— dealer!ellie prequel

🎀 a prequel to my other dealer!ellie fics! the ending got cut off and tumblr won’t fix the glitch so i’m sorry it ends abruptly :((((

* you didn’t even really wanna come to the party, that’s not why you were in college. you knew it sounded lame, but up until this moment you had been more invested in spending your time at the library, joining societies and having thrilling debates in your classes. a girl on your floor had pretty much adopted you, seeing how quiet and sweet you were. she felt you were wasting your potential, as she so kindly put — so she managed to convince you to tag along.

* you ended up exactly where you thought you would, against the wall in a huddle of girls that weren’t quite including you. it’s not like you hadn’t tried, but they were all so familiar with each other you found it difficult to edge your two-cents into the conversation. you gave up, excusing yourself and wandering over to the drinks table for a refill. you took the ladle out from the punch bowl and a voice stopped you. “i wouldn’t drink that, i just saw some frat-douche itch his sack and then stick his finger in there.”

* you turned to look at the girl and was taken aback by how attractive she was. you felt like you’d seen her before, you must have done — you don’t forget s face like that. an eyebrow slit, freckles across her cheeks and gorgeous green eyes, all features that made it hard to forget someone. ellie had been watching you since you’d entered however, how couldn’t she? you were gorgeous, and whilst she’d definitely seen you entering her building she’d never seen you at a party before.

* “oh… thanks for letting me know.” you pursed your lips, placing the ladle back in the bowl. you cursed yourself inwardly for being so awkward but she didn’t seem to mind, turning her body fully towards you with intrigue.

* “you don’t really come to these things do you?” she conversed as you picked up a bottle, pouring some into your cup. you smiled this time, looking down at the red solo in your hands and shrugged. “is it that obvious?” you cringed. her smile only grew as she stepped the tiniest bit closer so she could be heard over the music.

* “trust me, i wouldn’t choose to be here. i’m sure you’ve realised by now you’re not missing out on much.” she smirked, gazing out across the party. “i’m ellie, by the way.” she turned to you, holding out her hand.

* you spoke your name with a shy smile and shook her hand, it was warm and bigger than yours and she squeezed it in a friendly way before pulling away slowly, fingers lingering against eachothers for a moment before dropping. “you smoke?” she was almost certain you didn’t, just from your general demeanour. ellie was excellent at reading people, and when you shook your head in embarrassment she was proven correct. “no? good. that shit is bad for your teeth.”

* ellie seemed to be an excellent conversationalist and you panicked, realising you were giving her nothing to work with. “you…have freckles.” you blurt out, face scrunching up slightly after you did. she sensed the gay panic coming off you and stared dumbfounded for a moment before laughing. whilst you were embarrassed, it wasn’t a mean laugh in the slightest. infact it made you feel more comfortable and you chuckled too. “i mean, yeah i definitely do. great observation.” she chuckled.

* you rectified your mistake. “i was meant to say i like them.” you avoided her eyes for a moment before peaking up at her, seeing the smile morph more into a smirk as her eyes danced around your face. “thanks.” she accepted, a little softer. “my freckles like you too.”

* you giggled, before your friend was calling you back over. you reluctantly excused yourself from ellie, who watched you as you trailed off. you were a shy, quiet, good girl. ellie had to have you.

* “there you are! you get us any good shit?” jennifer, who had brought you to the party looked you over, looking to see if you were holding anything. “huh?”

* she looked at you obviously. “ellie? our dealer, everyone’s dealer? what she give you?” the circle of girls looked at you expectedly and you turned and looked over your shoulder a little embarrassed, ellie looking away when she saw you look. “oh…we were just talking.” you watched the circle of girls faces drop in disappointment. jennifer laughed in confusion.

* “you’re telling me ellie didn’t try and sell to you? that girl is like a walking billboard for her shit, i’ve never spoken to her about anything but weed, c’mon — hey ellie!” she called out, capturing the taller girls attention, eyes a little wide.

* she dragged you over there by the wrist and you felt your face burning hot, terrified over what she was about to say. “you not gonna hook us up tonight?”

* ellie crossed her arms over her chest. she came across friendly, but not overly as she seemed a little irritated with jennifer’s loud mouth. “was i meant to read your mind?” she sarked.

* “shush, look i’ll trade you one pretty girl for a gram for me and my girlies.” she placed her hands on your shoulders and thrust you playfully towards ellie slightly making you flush even more, eyes wide and apologetic. ellie chuckled awkwardly, patting her pocket down for a little ziplock baggie, checking if she had one as she’d already sold a few tonight. she looked around the room before nodding towards the patio door. “patio.” she instructed as jennifer and her other nameless friend whooped and shimmied out towards the sliding door.

* before ellie went to follow she turned to you, placing a hand gently on your elbow. “was nice to meet you, don’t let jennifer push you around, yeah?” she nodded and you nodded back at her with doe eyes, her heart softening at this before she followed the two clients out onto the patio, leaving you with butterflies in your stomach and a new crush.

[adverbally]

God…. Thinking about that fic you posted about Steve going into subspace and Eddie misunderstanding and just leaving him by himself in the middle of nowhere - that wrecked me!!!! Such good good angst (I have long wordy thoughts, please ignore if it’s too much!!)

Thinking about Steve somehow stumbling back to his car and his house in a haze and not being able to explain why he feels so awful the next few days, and deciding to shove everything in a box and bury it

Eddie and Steve avoid each other until s4 happens. Eddie slowly lowering his walls and realising that steve is a good guy, if not one of the best and starts paying attention, starts putting together the pieces of all the shit Steve’s been through and vows to be there, to be the one take care of him

Maybe one day in the future, after they’ve been drinking - Steve being tipsy and loose from the liquor - finally lets himself flirt with the pretty boy his been pining after again.

And maybe while they flirt, Eddie brings up their last time together, and Steve lets it slip, how he felt - the floaty haze, the cold shock, the bad feeling that dragged after, trying to laugh off how it was probably insecure jock behaviour, how stupid it was that he sat around that lake for ages, how he felt drunk getting back to his car, back home - that is was good he was alone so no one could see him fumble.

Steve watching in real time as Eddie’s grin slowly drops, his face turning paler than he’s ever seen, only stopping at most broken, whispered “Steve” he’s ever heard.

Just,,,, of all the stuff Steve’s been through, steve puts it on the back burner bc he chalks it up to them being young and stupid but it just… wrecks Eddie for a while

I can’t believe you came in my askbox and hurt my feelings about my own fic like this 😭

But seriously, I love talking about this stuff so feel free to come off anon and message me! 💕

I hope you enjoy this little fix-it follow up to You Tattered Me, You Tethered Me to You based on this amazing idea. (And I think this is my first askbox fic?! I’m so excited!)

———

Steve’s face is already warm from drinking but the way Eddie is looking at him makes his cheeks flare even hotter. It’s embarrassing, remembering how clingy he had been, how he had wanted that closeness while also being ashamed of it. “Sorry, I didn’t mean—”

“No, Steve, I’m sorry,” Eddie interrupts. “You never… I didn’t realize that’s what happened. I thought you were having some sexuality crisis, not…” He sighs, floundering for the right words through the haze of alcohol. “I should’ve seen what was going on and taken care of you.”

“What?” Steve scoffs. “Why should you have to babysit me just because I couldn’t pull myself together?”

So Eddie explains subspace and sub drop to him, answering all of Steve’s questions to the best of his ability. It makes Steve’s head swim, learning about a whole new world that he never knew existed, but Eddie is so patient with him. It hurts, too, finally having the words to ask for what he needed, long after he needed them.

“Well, I guess now you know for next time. If it happens again.” Eddie won’t look Steve in the eye, just fiddles with the rings on his left hand.

Steve pauses. It seems like a risk, being honest here, but the booze is making him brave and Eddie is so beautiful in the warm light of Steve’s kitchen. “It hasn’t happened since then. Just with you,” he confesses. Saying it out loud feels more intimate than Eddie fucking him had.

“Oh.” Eddie looks more shocked than anything. “That’s… flattering. Thanks,” he says softly, glancing at Steve from the corner of his eye with a small smile.

“Is that weird?” Steve is immediately prodding him, trying to gauge what that reaction means. “Like, do you think it means something?”

Eddie takes a long sip of his beer like he’s steeling himself for something. Gathering his courage. “I don’t know that it’s weird, per se. And I can’t tell you what your feelings are, but I think maybe…” He sighs, thumbnail picking at the corner of the label sweating off the beer bottle. “Maybe you let yourself get that deep because you trusted me. Maybe you haven’t felt that with someone since then.”

Steve wishes Eddie would look at him, really look at him. “Yeah, maybe. I thought you knew what you were doing and I let you take the lead because I hadn’t, um, been with a guy before. So I guess that takes trust.”

“I was a drug dealer hooking up with you in my shady van,” Eddie snorts. “Your self-preservation instincts could use some work.”

“Or I could just tell that you’re a good guy,” Steve fires back. “You gotta stop putting yourself down like that.”

Eddie is staring at him now. His eyes are wide and dark and shiny.

“I trust you, Eddie. I know it for a fact now, after everything that happened in March. I know that you wanna protect people and do the right thing. And you take shit so other people don’t have to, and you don’t hide who you are, and you made me feel so…” Steve rubs his forehead in frustration when the words don’t come fast enough. “I don’t know, it wasn’t just a subspace thing that time. I knew you were gonna take care of me as soon as we kissed.”

“Steve.” Eddie looks gobsmacked.

“I could be about to ruin our friendship right now, but I really like you.” He sounds pathetic to his own ears, pleading with Eddie to hear his words and feel the same. “I wanna let you take care of me, and I wanna take care of you right back.”

It catches Steve completely off guard when Eddie lunges forward and meets his lips in a sloppy kiss. It’s awkward and off-center, but it’s the best kiss Steve has ever had, especially when Eddie settles one hand on Steve’s hip and the other on his jaw and holds him close. He tastes like cigarettes and beer and a hint of cinnamon gum. Steve commits it to memory.

“I want that, too,” Eddie tells him, still so close that their noses are touching. “I want you.”

Their next kiss clacks when their grinning teeth collide.

[kentocidal]

chuuya and “i dont need help and i dont need you either” bc i want to see u suffer <3333 /jjj

uploading file chuuya20.txt . . . upload complete !

warning! this file contains content that could be distressing to some viewers. angst, alcohol consumption, unrequited emotions, chuuya nakahara is bad at feelings, selfship coded

internal message: hey els? fuck you /j. evil. evil evil evil.

new notification ! @kaedescara @yaekiss (want your own notification? send an ask off anon!)

you sat silently in his apartment, a fingernail clinking rapidly against the side of a sweating highball glass filled with melting ice and dark liquor. you had broken in after not hearing from him for a week, not being able to get ahold of anybody close to him in yokohama at all. you couldn’t find him, and it was eating you alive.

you knew it wasn’t wise to break into someone’s home, especially not chuuya’s, especially after he had already thrown you out and kicked you away like an unwanted puppy many times throughout your long history with him.

ever since you tried to get closer to him when you were both young and lost and part of the sheep, he had this hatred for you. something angry and jealous of your smiling face and your ability to care for him. he always shoved you away in favor of going through life on his own. he had stopped speaking to you altogether when you followed him to the port mafia, but eventually gave up on avoiding your kindness and allowed you small crumbs of hope.

leaving you in the dark about his position was customary. leaving you in the dark for a week without any news was a red flag.

you grunted as you knocked back the rest of the liquor in your glass and made a face at the taste. he always had a palate different than yours.

you shifted in your seat to get onto your feet, but instead lurched forward when you heard the front door click open. on instinct, you felt for the gun at your hip and aimed, breath hitching.

instead of some sort of danger or infiltration, it was just chuuya, battered and bruised, his own gun raised towards you, as if he had expected someone to break in.

you lowered your pistol first. “where have you been?”

“how did you get in here?!”

“bedroom window, far right side. you should get better locks.”

“you should stop breaking into people’s apartments!”

“i was worried about you!” he had a point, frankly. you shouldn’t be breaking into people’s apartments to conduct wellness checks. but as part of the port mafia, not only was that your job, it was chuuya’s too.

chuuya clicked his teeth and kicked the door shut, walking over to the island to drop his own gun down onto the granite and take his hat off.

“you’re bleeding, idiot.” you reached out a hand towards his face, only to have it be slapped away by chuuya’s gloves one.

“thank you, captain obvious. i’m fine. leave before i call the police on you for breaking and entering.”

“we both know you can’t do that, firstly,” you sighed watching the way his hands shook as he moved a bar stool closer to him, “and secondly, you had to have expected that i would come looking for you.”

“i did, and i’m mad i was right.” he snapped right back at you, glaring, taking one step and then collapsing heavily into the bar stool like his body was made of lead. you flinched.

“where were you?” 

“on a mission. out. busy.” he snarled, reaching across the island for your glass of melting ice and pressing it to his cheek. “will you leave now?”

“no.” you gritted your teeth, doubling down in that stubborn way that made chuuya’s heart squeeze. “you look about ready to pass out. i can’t leave you like this.”

“why are you always so annoying? this is ridiculous! you broke into my apartment, you’re always up my ass trying to coddle me and be something to me that you’re not.” he put the glass down so heavily on the island you thought it was going to shatter. “you’re always doing this — getting yourself so worked up over me and getting in my way. when will you take a hint and back off? i don’t need help, and i don’t need you.”

you take in a soft breath as he says the words to you, knowing that your hurt is written all over your face. he makes a choked sound before gritting his teeth and turning away. “just get out, will you? this is so annoying.”

you bite your lip to stop it from wobbling as you get to your feet and exit out into the hallway via the door this time, shutting it softly behind you. maybe you had always known that chuuya would continue to push you away when all you wanted, at the very least, was to be his friend.

chuuya just couldn’t accept a companionship. he looked at the glass on the table and picked it up, lining his lips with the smudges on the glass to drink the watered down mixture at the bottom, longing for a leftover taste of you he would never find.

[spidercookie18]

Hey there @spidercookie18 I have a request for you! It’s about max wanting to “spend some quality time” with the boys and takes them to a bar and the boys not having any money makes max pay for their drinks and they get very drunk to the point where they don’t want to leave the bar and max have to drug them out the bar which leads to them having temper tantrums like they are children and causing a seen on the boardwalk!

If you want to do it! 😅

Summary: Max feels bad about not bonding with the boys, and invites them out to the bars. Word Count: 5.7k Tags: Implied drug use, drinking, mild homophobia/racism, mild gore, swearing.

Sorry for taking literally (hypothetically) forever to answer this. I actually had a bit of a hard time wrapping my head around it bc I’ve had to drag people out of the bar before and it is a...not fun experience. But! I’ve also had some really fun experiences being kicked out; just cause me and my buddies were being headass and harassing the bouncers. I do really like this concept (any concept of the boys absolutely fucking with Max and his money), it was really fun to write. Again, sorry for the late response. <3

Max stood on the porch outside his home. He rubbed the brass key between his thumb and his index; almost unwilling to walk inside. He heard the soft sound of the tv and the clinking of dishes. Lucy was insistent on having home cooked meals; it gave her some ease by reminding her of who she used to be.

He exhaled slowly; putting the key into the lock and turning the knob. He was immediately greeted by the warm smell of Lucy’s cooking, her humming became a cheerful, “hi, how was work?”

Max grumbled some kind of, “fine,” and walked off to avoid his wife. Thorn wagged his tail as Max walked past him too, hoping for some kind of recognition from his master and best friend. The old vampire walked off to the bedroom. He sat on the edge of the bed and put his head in his hands in defeat.

His mind wandered to the young family that came into the store that night, hoping to rent something all six of them could watch together; a mother, father, and four young boys.

He recalls greeting them, and offering some help picking a movie, relating to them through the fact he also had four boys.

He watched as the boys ran through the aisles of the store, grabbing and shouting at everything they saw. The mother apologized profusely, and Max assured her it was no problem.

Max: They’re quite a handful at that age.

Dad: You have no idea

Max: Actually, I do.

Max pulls out his wallet and shows the father a picture of his four ‘sons’.

Dad: Oh wow, does it get any easier?

Max chuckles as he puts his wallet away. He continues to speak in his friendly demeanor.

Max: Not in the slightest.

Dad: That’s tough to hear. They were so cute when they were little, but it’s tough now that they have all this energy.

Max: Oh, I know how that is!

Dad: …how do you keep up with them? I mean, they never want to spend any time with me anymore…

Max stared off at the four boys tearing through his store, a nightmare for their mother.

Max continued to sit on the bed. He heard the sound of Thorn scratching at the bedroom door. “Go away Thorn,” he sighed, apathetically.

A soft knock came soon after. Lucy slowly opened the door and poked her head into the room to check on Max. There was a soft patting of her slippers on the floor as she walked over to her husband. “Hey, what’s wrong?” She placed a hand on his shoulder.

Max groaned, not looking up from his hands. “It’s nothing,” he mumbled. Lucy did not close the door when she came in, and Thorn was now nudging his wet dog nose into Max’s lap. “Thorn, get down,” Max protested. His furry friend sat by his feet and continued to whine and poke his nose at his master’s legs.

Lucy: Max?

Max: It’s just the boys…

Lucy: What did they do this time.

Max:

Max: Nothing, I just feel like I’m failing as a father. I mean a proper ‘human’ father.

Lucy: What do you mean?

Max: There was this family that came into the store, and the father asked how I stayed close with my boys.

Lucy: And? What did you tell him?

Max: Well, I’m close with David but-

Lucy: Are you?

Max: What do you mean?

Lucy: Are you actually close with David?

Max sat, dumbfounded. Staring at the dog by his feet. Thinking about the meaning of Lucy’s words.

Max: Well, he listens to me.

Lucy: But are you close?

Max: I suppose not. But what do you expect me to do? They never listen to me! Every time I’ve tried to bond with them, they bite me, break my things, and run away!

Lucy: Well, maybe it’s time to do something they would like to do.

Max: …what do they like to do?

Lucy: Hm, maybe talk to Mike?

Max took Lucy’s counsel and sat down with Michael. He asked what his sons liked to do on their off time. Michael started rattling off a list, “speeding, stealing, fighting, f-cking, playing tricks on people, jacking cars, drinking, video games, I dunno man, just crimes in general.” After the short brainstorming, Max decided the best way to get them to open up would be by loosening them up with drinks. Michael immediately let him know that was a terrible idea and advised that they go on a hunt instead.

“No no, a father knows best,” Max stood firm on his decision. He wanted him and his boys to rekindle their relationship at their favorite bar.  

Michael saw the boys before Max did, and he let them know what their father figure intended for them.

The little devils immediately started scheming. They decided that if Max was insistent on ‘hanging out with them,’ they were going to do their damndest to make him regret it.

A few nights later, Max informed David that they were to wait for him outside their bar… and also, he wanted to know where it was. David, still half skeptical Max would be stupid enough to do something like this, asked if he was sure he could keep up.

Max assured him he wanted to enjoy some ‘fatherly bonding’ with his broodlings and that he could keep up with the way the boys drank.

David half felt bad for his sire. He was sure he had no idea what he was really getting himself into. David insisted to Max that ‘their bar’ was something he should work his way up to and told him the name of a different bar. Max agreed, and when the day came, he waited outside of the bar David told him to.

He made sure to tell the boys to be there before he did. He told them be there at 8, which meant they would show up at 9. He didn’t want to wait for them long, and he stood on the corner by the edge of the bar.

Max was incredibly nervous. He knew the boys didn’t like to be around him for more than a few minutes. Hell, he couldn’t remember a time where they’d willingly hung out with him.

Max stood anxiously, his back to the alley. He almost felt bad for choosing to go on the weekend as there was a short line of people beginning to form outside the bar. He was listening for the boys’ bikes; anxiously waiting for them to show, but they dropped in on the ground behind him. The gravel in the alley shifting under their heavy boots. David clasped a hand on Max’s back, startling him.

David: Woaah, didn’t mean to scare ya, old timer.

Max: Oh, boys, it’s just you.

David: Were you expecting someone else?

Max: Well no, bu-

Marko: I’m thirsty! Let’s go in already.

Marko pushed through the crowd of people, with Paul and Dwayne following close behind him. The humans huffed and shouted as the biker boys walked through the line. The short, curly haired blond stood in front of the bouncer, who was waiting for their ID’s.

Max stood behind the boys, waiting to see what they would do. Marko pulled something out of his pocket. Max couldn’t see what it was, but he assumed it was a fake ID. They were much too old to have a ‘proper’ ID, something that their human documents wouldn’t be able to give them. The bouncer was tall, and burly. He was a young man, but his presence did a good job at warding off troublemakers.

The human man held the card up to the light under the doorway and turned it in his hands. He bent it a bit, then handed it back to Marko and gestured for him to go inside. Paul stepped up next, and as his sons slowly went into the bar, Max could hear the music inside get louder. He got a peak into the building as Dwayne went through the door. David pushed Max ahead of him, trying to make sure he didn’t chicken out at the last second.

The bouncer waited impatiently for Max to retrieve his ID from his wallet. He handed the card to the man and the human looked suspiciously at Max and his picture.

“I assure you; I’m legally allowed to drink.” Max tried to ease his nerves with a joke.

The bouncer didn’t laugh. This only helped to make Max more uneasy. The human handed the card back to Max, “you look good for 63.”

David snickered behind Max, and the older, embarrassed vampire stepped out of the way. David tried to hand his ID to the bouncer, but the man declined. “Please David, I know you. I just had to make a show for all the damn people you guys pushed out of the way.”

 “S’my bad, Kev, we’re taking our gramps out on the town,” David chided. “The boys are just excited.” David dapped up the bouncer, and the human moved to hold the door open for David and Max.

Max followed David into the bar. It was a dimly lit, low end lounge bar. There was a green under light wrapped around the length of the bar, which Marko, Dwayne, and Paul were already at. The floor was some type of cheap vinyl faux wood, and there was a half stage at the back of the room. The place was moderately packed for a Saturday night.

David leaned over the counter to grab something from behind the bar, and the green haired bartender immediately snapped at him.

David: Woah, take it easy, stud. It’s just one bottle.

Bartender: Not tonight, David, my boss is up my ass about givin’ you guys free stuff.

David: Well darlin’, if you didn’t want me around, you wouldn’t keep the bottle chilled for me.

The bartender rolled his eyes and continued to pour shots out that Marko had already ordered.

Paul: We’re celebrating tonight, we got our ‘daddy’ with us. Paul snickered.

Max: Oh, no, please don’t call me that. I’m their father.

Dwayne: So, just put it all on his tab.

Dwayne, Paul, and Marko turned to Max, waiting for him to pull his credit card out.

Max: Ah, yes. I invited you boys out, so… I suppose it’s my treat.

The bartender took the card and dropped the five shots in front of David.

Marko: Drink up, ‘daddy’.

Max grimaced, and watched the boys take their shots like it was nothing. He looked down at the clear liquid as it gently swayed inside the glass. He crinkled his nose and knocked back the shot.

Max: Holy f-wow! I forgot how hot that was. Max coughed.

David: Ha-ha, how long has it been since you drank? David twisted the cap off the bottle of jaeger he got from behind the bar.

Max: Gee, I don’t know… He watched as David called the bartender back from the other end of the bar.

Bartender: What do you want? He sighed.

David: So mean tonight. Does somebody need an attitude adjustment? He raised his eyebrow and flashed his toothy smile. Just give me that Red Bull back there, I don’t think I can reach it.

Paul: Oh, and those beers I like!

The bartended grabbed two Red Bulls from the mini fridge behind the bar and handed them to David. He turned and grabbed five long neck bottles and popped the caps off for them.

David: Thanks, hot stuff. David winked at him.

David finished pouring out the jaeger bombs and him and the boys eagerly gobbled them up. Max was not nearly as eager as his ‘sons’, but decided to drink; wanting to keep up the appearance of comradery.

He immediately gagged the second the liquid finished flowing down his throat.

David and the boys laughed at him.

“Christ! What was that?” He continued to gag.

 “Yeaaaaah, you’ll get used to that.” Paul joked. They moved to a high table near the back of the bar, and once they were seated, David poured another round of shots.

Max tried to make small talk with his sons, but he had no idea where to start. The boys were not much help easing the tension; especially with Dwayne eyeing Max the way he was.

David assured him it was just because they weren’t used to being around him. Which was true. David was the first turned. He spent almost 40 years with Max, so he was used to the uncomfortable silence. But the others had David, they had each other. After they were turned, they never had to worry about being alone in a room with Max; they never learned to be comfortable around him. He sat quietly, and sipped on his beer.

Max shifted nervously in his seat. Unsure how to break the ice. He tried to think of some of the conversation pieces he’d memorized earlier in the week, but the liquor in his system seemed to keep them from his grasp.

The boys had no problem entertaining themselves though. Marko and Paul were taking turns pulling down the zipper of some girl that was dancing near them. They were not doing this physically, no, they were employing their magic to pull on her zipper.

After a few minutes, in her drunken state, she’d seemed to have danced her dress off. She shrieked and picked up her dress around her body. But the devil twins, chortled at her Spanx. 

“Oh, don’t start,” David half groaned, half laughed.

Max turned around to see the lady duck and scream into the bathroom. “What just happened?”

“Oh? You wanna see it again?” Marko grinned deviously. He turned back around and yanked a young man’s pants down. His stained underwear exposed to the bar.

Dwayne and Paul laughed at him. Max turned to the table, confused how they were so eagerly playing pranks on the bar patrons.

“You don’t worry about being caught?”

They scrunched their faces at him, confused by his nervousness. “Dude, shut up,” Marko sneered. He turned David’s bottle over and poured out another round of shots.

“Just drink,” Paul reassured him. They all knocked back another round. Max was really starting to feel a buzz through his body. He watched as the boys continued to subtly mess with the patrons around them.

In his half-drunk state, he felt his lips begin to loosen. “How did you boys get IDs?”

“We don’t have IDs?” David said, puzzled. “Oh, you mean,” him and the others began to pull their wallets out.

They showed Max varying plastic cards. David had the driver’s license of a woman from Idaho. Marko had a blood donor card he stole from a young man’s wallet. Paul had an In-N-Out gift card, and Dwayne had a casino Player’s card.

Max stared at the boys’ ‘IDs’ in amazement. He’d always been envious of their magic. Moreso than he would ever admit. Ever since they were turned, he could feel their potential exceed his. Especially in David. His magic was more potent and more powerful than he could have ever hoped to be. And that’s part of why he was so hard on him.

Unfortunately for Max’s ego, letting them run wild only let their magic grow wild too.

Max’s train of thought was derailed by the sound of blaring music. The ambiance that the bar was playing was completely drowned out by the DJ booth.

“Ugh!” Marko groaned, “he’s back.”

Max covered his ears, the loud, piercing music hurting his sensitive vampire ears. The boys all winced with how loud the pop music was playing. Their ears twitched and they turned to look at the DJ that was playing a combination latin dance and country music.

“Is it 10 already?” Paul whined.

“This guy suuuuucks!” Dwayne hissed. Dwayne and Marko started loudly booing the DJ. Uncaring of his feelings, and the scene they were making.

“Hey knock it off!” The bartender hollered at them.

David made no move to stop his brothers. He just twisted the cap back on his mostly full jaeger bottle, and got up.

Paul followed David, and Max, not wanting to stay with the other two who were yelling and arguing with the DJ, followed David as well.

Max stood outside on the sidewalk behind David and Paul. David handed the large bottle of jaeger to Paul and pulled his cigarettes out.

“Was that it? Are we done being at the bars?” Max asked the two blond boys.

Paul belted, “not a chance,” he patted his stomach, “we’re just done with that bar.”

David lit the cigarette in his mouth and put his lighter back in his pocket. He half turned to Paul, stepping aside away from the line of people, “where do you wanna go next?”

Paul shrugged, thinking for a second. He picked at the wet label on the side of the bottle that was starting to peel. “Hey, what about X?”

David nodded silently, a soft smile held the lit cig, the smoke twirling up towards the streetlight. They waited there for Marko and Dwayne to finish harassing the DJ, and when they strolled out of the bar, Dwayne showed David he managed to grab some wallets from the other bar-goers. 

David chuckled, “we’re going to X’s,” he said plainly, ashing the cigarette and holding it at his side between his fingers.

“Hell yeah!” Marko started pumping his fists into the air. He jogged across the street to the park, he planned to cut through the park on the way to the next bar. “Ducks! Ducks! Ducks!” He started chanting, and the others followed him across the street.

“You leave those ducks alone!” Dwayne shouted. They watched Marko jog off into the distance, a good bit ahead of the group.

“Ducks?” Max asked David.

The blond slowly puffed on his cigarette as they strolled through the dark park. “Yeah, Marko likes to… feed the ducks at the pond.”

Max was confused by his disposition. Feeding the ducks sounded fun and wholesome. Something he didn’t think his sons were capable of.

They soon happened upon the pond in the middle of the park. Marko was already crouched down petting some of the ducks. They quacked softly as they formed a half circle around him. As they got closer, Max heard a noise coming from Marko, it was a half gagging, half clicking noise. He noticed the other boys didn’t stop to watch their brother. They walked around the pond and continued to sip on the alcohol they took from the bar.

Max stood a bit behind Marko, and he heard the noise get louder. He decided to walk to where the other boys were, his unease making him wander away. When he was further in front of Marko, he turned back to watch him regurgitate something for the ducks.

Max stood, horrified. As his second eldest spat up eyeballs for the greedy ducks below him. He could hear the other boys laughing ahead of him, but he was transfixed on Marko. The slimy, goopy liquid that came out like thick maple syrup, it coated the soft wet eyeballs and sloshed when it hit the ducks and ground.

Dwayne and David were laughing at their sire, he was stuck watching the littlest vampire, and the nasty thing he was doing.

“Yeah, we’re pretty sure that’s where geese come from,” Paul chuckled.

Max watched as Marko bent to pet another duck and then sprinted to catch up with the rest of the group. Max was a bit afraid of him now, and the display he just watched.

“God, I think I need another drink.” Max spoke, distressed.

David shoved the bottle into his hand, and Max eagerly put it to his lips.

The next bar laid ahead of them. This bar was very loud compared to the last one. It appeared to have several garage doors and a wraparound patio. The walls, or garage doors, were open, and the flashing lights and pop music was very noticeable from the park. As they walked up to the bar, Max noticed the very long line that seemed to be 30 or 40 people deep.

Paul was the first to walk up to the bouncer.

“Long time no see, X, how you been?” Paul put what Max thought were some cigarettes into his hand and did the same weird handshake he saw David do at the last bar.

The bouncer nodded, “can’t complain, s’good to see ya brother.”

“Likewise, man,” Paul patted the human’s forearm and walked past him, he waited near the bouncer for Max and the others.  Max noticed as each brother walked past, they did the funky handshake. Max was unsure what to do, he stood in front of the bouncer who eyed him suspiciously.

“Back of the line sir,” the bouncer sternly spoke.

“He’s with us!” Dwayne hollered over the music as he walked inside.

The bouncer gestured for Max to go inside, his demeanor changing immediately. He moved his hand to his jeans to pocket the spliffs that Paul handed him when Max put his hand out.

“Thanks…homie.” Immediately as the words left his mouth, he knew that was wrong. The bouncer just stared at him, his smile fading.

Paul immediately came to collect Max, “sorry, he doesn’t get out much.” He apologized for his sire’s ignorant behavior.

As the two walked into the building to meet the others at the bar, Paul tried to correct Max. “Hey, you can’t talk to strangers like that, it’s not cool man.”

“But Marko said it,” Max tried to defend himself.

“Yea, but they’re friends.” Paul gently shoved Max to the bar, the wood hitting him in the sternum.

Now he felt bad emotionally, and physically. He knew he embarrassed himself, but he didn’t want to embarrass the boys. He knew how bad it felt to be embarrassed by someone you know; he didn’t want to make them look bad. Paul stood next to his brothers, and leaned in to tell them what Max’d done.

“He said what?” Marko shouted.

Max groaned. The bartender finally made her way to Max and the boys.

Bartender: What can I get for you?

Max: Um…just one sec.

He turned to the boys who were arguing amongst themselves. The bartender groaned as she was about to move on to the next people in line. Noticing her out of the corner of his eye, Marko stepped up to the counter.

Marko: Lemmie get three red bulls, fou- five adios, and a double of Malört.

David: And five Coors.

The bartender made a face at Marko, then shrugged, and started making the drinks. Max placed his card on the counter and waited for the bartender to drop off the drinks.

Max: What’s Malört?

Paul: A punishment.

Max: Pun-for what?

Paul: You know what you did.

Max:

Marko: Take your Malört first then you can wash it down with an adios.

Max: What’s in an adios?

Dwayne: You’ll find out.

The bartender dropped off the drinks and took the card. David signaled for her to keep it open, and she put it back in front of them after she swiped it. Max sniffed the Malört and felt his eyes begin to water.

Max: I do not want to drink this.

Paul: It’s not that bad, just do it.

Max unwillingly took the shot. The second it touched his tongue he immediately felt like he was going to throw up.

Dwayne: If you hurl, we go home.

Marko: Do it! You know you want to.

David: Is he gonna do it?

Paul: I think he’s gonna do it!

Max swallowed hard, and panted, trying to fight away the urge to throw up. His stomach felt hot and painful. Like he’d just taken a punch to the gut, or like he just drank bile.

Max: I thought you said that wasn’t going to be bad??

Paul: Oh yeah, I lied.

Marko: Don’t be a wuss, just keep drinking and it’ll go away.

The boys picked up the red bulls and their drinks and walked over to a booth by the dance floor. Max swayed uneasily side to side. He was a vampire, sure, but he wasn’t used to this heavy drinking. It was really starting to get to him. He played with the straw in the blue drink and felt a flush come to his face. The boys took notice of his demeanor, and how he giggled at the colored strobing lights overhead.

David: You good?

Max:

Paul: You like your drink?

Max looked down at the blue drink. He put the straw in his mouth and eagerly sipped on it.

Max: Wow this is way better than that other thing!

Dwayne: Why did you want to hang out with us?

Max: Because you’re my sons.

Marko: But you’ve never treated us like your sons.

Max: … I know. And I’m sorry for that.

TLB:

Max:

David: So now you want to play ‘house’?

Max: No, no. I…I always wanted a family. I just…I’m envious of you boys.

TLB: The boys looked at each other, unsure of Max’s honesty.

Marko: Why would you be envious of us?

Max: You have each other, You’re brothers, peers. You’re never alone, and you are all so strong, and intelligent, and young.

David: Well, you’re 200 years older than us. You made us to be sons not peers.

Max: I was young when I set my mind out to have a family… I thought it would be easier than this.

Marko: Well, you suck at being a dad.

Max: I know, I’m sorry. I know I never taught you anything about being a vampire. I… feel bad that you had to learn things by yourselves. Especially you, David.

David: Well, apology not accepted.

Max: But-

David cut him off, his tone of voice angry, holding back his rage as best he could, David spat at Max.

David: You were a shitty sire for 200 years. One “I’m sorry,” and a few beers isn’t going to make it okay.

Max:

TLB:

The group sipped on their beers, and Max continued to sip on his blue drink. He felt so low in that moment. Maybe it was a mistake to try and bond with the boys after all this time.

David stood up, taking his beer with him to the patio to go smoke. Marko and Dwayne nudged each other, trying to break free from the uncomfortable silence. The two stood and walked over to the dance floor, trying to find partners for the night.

Max and Paul stayed at the booth, nervously avoiding eye contact. Max watched the curly haired blond and the brunet quickly find a pair of red head coeds. After a few minutes of grinding and bumping, the girls led the boys out to the parking lot.

Max stared at them, confused. “Wait, I thought you boys were still….” He asked Paul, too embarrassed to say the word.

“Homos?” Paul chuckled at Max’s embarrassment. He took a long sip of his beer as they watched the two vampires and their ‘dates’ duck behind some cars. “Papa, your baby boys are whores, s’all you need to know.”

“Huh,” Max stared off in the direction of the parking lot. “You boys really just do whatever you want?”

Paul turned his attention away from the cars and switched from drinking his beer to the adios. “Yup, s’a pretty sweet life,” Paul looked over to the front of the bar, he noticed X leave his post and waved him over to where he was sitting.

The bouncer leaned over the table a bit to talk to Paul, “where’d everybody go?”

Paul snorted, “you know Dwayne.”

The bouncer smiled and gestured for the blond to follow him to the patio. Paul scooted from the booth and grabbed his drinks. He looked at Max, who sat by himself now, dejected. Paul invited him outside, he felt bad for the old guy.

He never had anything personal against Max. Paul, being the youngest, never actually spent any real time with Max. He just learned to avoid him because all the others seemed to distrust him.

Max cheered up a bit. On the way out the patio he apologized to the human. He felt weird apologizing to a human, but if he was someone important to the boys, then he was important.

The trio found David sitting outside, staring at the shaking cars in the parking lot. He was swirling his beer around, trying to ignore the emotions that tried to bubble to the surface.

They sat at a table with David, and he rolled his eyes when he saw Max was with them. Max sat across from David, next to Paul. X pulled the spliffs from his pocket and Paul handed him a lighter.

“Oh, Paul rolls your cigarettes?” He asked, too drunk to notice what it was.

The boys chuckled, “yeah, I roll his cigarettes.”

“Paul has a real steady hand,” X joked. He took a long inhale and handed the paper to Paul, who did the same.

The blond looked over at Max, “you wanna try?”

David scoffed, “he’s not into that kind of stuff.”

Max was on a mission to prove to David that he was more than he thought he was. The bleach blond vampire took the spliff from Paul and replaced the cigarette in his mouth with it.

David took a long drag and blew the smoke in Max’s face. His sire coughed, “I told you boys at the beginning,” he continued to cough, “I can hang.” David looked at Paul, who motioned for David to pass it to Max.

Max took what he thought was a ‘funny’ smelling cigarette. He took a long drag, like he’d seen the rest of the table do. He could taste the tobacco on his tongue, and as he took the smoke from his mouth down his lungs he tasted something else. The boys chided him on, encouraging him to hold it in his lungs as long as he could. Not that he needed to breathe, but he started coughing with the new feeling of this ‘odd’ smoke.

“Wow, that’s good,” he complemented Paul. The table encouraged him to take another drag, and hold it for longer this time, and that if the taste kept bothering him, he should drink his adios.

The rest of the night is a bit of a blur for Max.

He remembered Max and Dwayne coming to sit at the table… at some point in the night.

He remembered laughing with them, and telling them about his childhood, and his sire. He talked about how proud he was of them, being successful ‘vampire’ and terrors of the night. The boys didn’t need to explain anything to X, he just assumed Max got cross-faded and blacked out. Which, he was.

Max remembers flashing lights, glowsticks. The night was like a blur, but there were blips he could remember. Were the flashing lights neon, or red and blue?

Max laid in bed, tasting his dry mouth. His head ached, and so did his stomach. His clothes were dirty with blood and mud. He tried to sit up, and he noticed his shoes were missing.

He had no idea what time it was, or what exactly happened last night. The last thing he remembered was that cigarette. He groaned, looking into the mirror he noticed his hair a mess. His glasses were cracked, and his lips were bright blue from the adios.

He called for Lucy, who came to check on him. Thorn came too.

Max asked Lucy what happened, and what time he came home. Lucy was proud when she spoke. He commended the boys for bringing him home, and they made sure he was okay, and got to bed safe and sound. Max smiled at that.

“They wanted me to tell you thanks for last night.” Lucy handed Max a cup of water and started unbuttoning his shirt to help him relax. Max eagerly took the glass with one hand, and pet Thorn with the other. His furry friend happy to be getting attention.

“Oh,” Lucy added as she finished unbuttoning his shirt, “they wanted me to also tell you that they would be back next week.”

“Pardon?” Max was confused. He did not remember them talking about going somewhere last night.

Lucy explained to him that he had given the boys his cards and told them to go on vacation.

“I DID WHAT???” Max started fumbling with his phone, trying to open up his credit card app.

“You told me yourself that you wanted them to enjoy themselves. What’s wrong with that?” Lucy remarked.

The app finally loaded. He was devastated by what he saw.

He had no way of finding them now, as he was sure they pulled all the cash out in a lump sum and turned off their phones.

He sighed and threw himself back against the bed; they really got him good with that one.

The boys were sitting pretty in Las Vegas by now. They dropped Max off at home, withdrew all his money, and them and Michael took off for the Bellagio to book a suite.

Michael’s words echoed through his mind, “I wouldn’t do that if I were you.” He covered his face in his hands and wailed.

Max would be lucky if they came back in a week.  

[xrmywaifxx]

Hey I was wondering if could maybe get comfort for a Gn reader from daichi? I don’t know if I can explain it but my birthdays soon and every year for my birthday and New Years I get a rly deep anxiety of like “wasting my life” or smth idk it sounds stupid. But I get rly anxious around it bc I have a fear that I’m like not living life to my full potential, so every “milestone” is just a reminder that I’m failing. Idk I hope I was able to explain that enough, so if ur willing, I could use some comfort even if it’s just imaginary lol. Thx!

hello anon :) I appreciate you trusting me with something like this. I completely understand the feeling you are describing. I decided to go for New Years theme. I’m sorry for how late this is out.

11:43pm December 31st - New Year’s Eve

All you wanted to do that night was sit by your window. When you were small, you loved watching the fireworks, but lately, it has seemed more convenient as a distraction, a way to forget about life. You close your eyes, the subtle echo of the early fireworks slowly lulling you to sleep. Just then, you heard a noise. Opening your eyes, you hear another, seeing movement as a pebble hits your window. You open your window to the sight of your childhood friend Daichi. Bags in his hands, he smiled up at you the way he always does. So sweetly, like you were the only thing that mattered at that moment. "What are you doing down there, you idiot?" you shout at him. He holds his finger to his mouth, shooshing you, "Shhhhhh, you'll wake up your parents!" He quietly says to you from your backyard. You laugh, "My parents? At home on New Year's? Yeah, right." You say, "They're at some party." "Why aren't you?" He shoots back. You scoff, "You know I'm not the big party type. Besides, I had…more important things to do tonight." He smiles at the ground, hoping you don't see it--you do. "Oh, yeah? What kind of important things? You mean moping around your room all night and finally going to bed at 6 a.m.?" He laughs. and raises an eyebrow at you. You blush at the accuracy of his words, "Whatever, just meet me in the treehouse!" —————————————————— You and Daichi had built this treehouse with your dad when you were only in elementary school. A lot has changed since back then. Your parents divorced, your dad moved away, your mom remarried, and you started feeling differently toward Daichi. You wish you could go back to that age. Before your parents got divorced and before you developed a crush on Daichi. As Dachi slid into the treehouse, you realized that the inside was much smaller than you had remembered, or maybe you were just a lot bigger. As if reading your mind, Daichi says, "Wow, it's smaller than I remember." Because of the size--or lack of it--you were so close to Daichi that you could smell his simple cologne mixed with that coconut-scented shampoo he always used. "Y-yeah, it is.", you let out, already blushing from the proximity. You looked over and saw his bags again. You had noticed them before but didn't pay them much mind. Just as you're about to ask Daichi about them, he asks, "Wondering what's in the bags?" "Yeah, actually, I was." He empties the bags on the floor of the treehouse, and they're filled with all your favorite snacks. "Oh, Daichi, you brought me a picnic?" He nods in response, "I feel bad that I spent last New Year's with the team, so I wanted to make it up to you! Plus…I feel like I've barely seen you lately." That's true, you hadn't really seen each other. When you realized your crush on Daichi, you avoided hanging out with him, hoping he wouldn't find out. You smile, "Don't worry, I've missed you too. Now, let's dig into this food!" —————————————————— You gazed at the starry landscape out of the treehouse window. The sounds of the fireworks fade the further it gets from midnight, as the town slowly begins to doze, the excitement of the New Year now long faded. "Do you remember…" Daichi trails off. "Do I remember what?" You ask in response. "Nah, never mind.", "Well, now you have to tell me!" Daichi laughs, "Do you remember when we were young, about when we built this treehouse… and you had a crush on me."

You swear you felt your soul leave your body. You had no idea that he had ever known about your crush. The thought of him knowing makes you want to curl up into a ball and never come out. "Y-yeah. I remember that", you mutter.

"You know it's funny, but I always liked you too. I was just too scared to tell you." Daichi whispered. You weren't entirely sure why Daichi was telling you all of this, but somehow, knowing he used to like you gave you the littlest bit of hope. The long silence burned your ears, the awkwardness of the present conversation looming over you like clouds on a stormy day. Suddenly, Daichi spoke. You think that maybe he had felt the storm clouds just like you. "Sorry, maybe I shouldn't have brought that up." Daichi scratches his head. "No!" you respond quickly, "I don't mind. I just.. don't usually think of back then."

You feel Daichi's eyes on you as he asks, "Why not?" You simply shrug your shoulders. Daichi chuckles and smiles at you "Why do you always spend New Year's inside nowadays? Remember when we used to go on my roof and watch the fireworks?" You smile softly "Yeah…that was fun…but, I think I just grew out of this childish holiday." "Childish?" Daichi scoffs playfully "What makes New Year's childish?" You turn to look out the window "Everyone gets together and celebrates the end of the year and the beginning of a new one, but…what if…I don't want it to end? What if…I want things to stay the same? But what if I want some things to be different?" Daichi's eyebrows furrow in confusion "Hey, just slow down, you're not making any sense-'' Upon seeing his confused expression you take a deep breath "I just…I get anxious with every 'milestone' because…well, I'm scared that I'm not living to my full potential, you know? Every start of a new year just reminds me that I failed for a whole year…"

Before you can continue Daichi puts his hand on yours. "You're not failing…why would you think that?" You scoff "I'm barely passing my classes, I have no friends, and the only family I have is a mom who would choose her new husband over me any day." Daichi looks in thought for a moment and then laughs. "So…what you're trying to say is that nobody likes you because you're such a failure?" You blush in embarrassment "Why are you laughing about it?" "Oh, I'm laughing at how WRONG you are." You let out a sharp laugh "Oh really? How would you know?" He laughs again and then smiles "Because I like you. I would pick you over anyone."

It feels like your heart is going to beat out of your chest. He likes you? Does he mean in a friendly way or something else? Before your thoughts even finish spiraling in your head you feel Daichi grab your hand. "Sorry, I know it's sudden but… I hate seeing you like this. You like me too, right…?" You suddenly snap out of your thoughts "Of course! I mean um…yeah…I like you too, Daichi."

Maybe this new year won’t be so bad after all…

a/n: yall im so late with this one 😵‍💫, anyway i had so much fun with this, i haven’t written haikyuu in a while :D

dividers by: @/plutism

[velvetvexations]

So this is going to be kind of an insane ask to get but I don’t have anybody I can tell in my real life and you’re like the only person I follow who seems to genuinely give a shit about Ukraine still so. You can just delete it if you want to, I don’t mind. Just actually writing it out to another person will help.

I’ve been considering for the better part of 2024 joining the Ukraine volunteer army. Like, seriously considering, not just some throwaway thought. I even got my passport specifically because I was thinking about it. I know someone who did. Haven’t heard from him in a while but that’s the nature of this sort of thing, as far as I know he’s still out there. I want to also. I’ve got extended family in both Ukraine and Russia (which is more common than you’d think) but my parents are immigrants (it was long before I was born) and I’ve always been close to my extended family and people I’ve talked to from both places in my family are unhappy and everybody hates that this is happening. There’s this like chasm between both halves of my extended family now bc people can’t see each other anymore. Multiple of my extended family from Ukraine had to either run away to other countries or join the military, and I had one of my Russian cousins almost get caught immigrating to avoid being conscripted (he made it, he’s fine, he lives out of country now) and I hate being here in America watching it all happen and not able to do a damn thing about it, I donate as much as I can to a variety of Ukrainian funds and send money to family too, but I work at a fast food place and rent a shithole apartment I can barely afford, I can’t really donate much. But I’m a guy (well, not really, but I’m 0% transitioned and I’m fine with staying like this for something more important), I’m decently fit, I speak a little Ukrainian, I know how to use a gun, and from what I heard from the person I knew who went and what I’ve heard looking on forums and stuff that’s basically all they want at this point. Hell two of those things, language and experience with guns, seem to be slipping out of the requirements too because they need more people so bad. I feel like if I don’t I’m going to be crawling with regret for the rest of my life especially, ESPECIALLY, if Russia gets the upper hand and Ukraine falls. At least if I do this I could try to make a fucking minuscule sliver of a difference. But I know my parents will be really upset, especially if I just take off. My friends too but I don’t have a lot of those anyways. And obviously I know I might die, or be disabled or whatever but I just don’t care, even though I feel like I should. But I just don’t, because I feel like doing my part would be worth either of those things. Maybe I’m just crazy and blinded by how upset this entire fucking “conflict” makes me, but like your other anon said it really feels like the entire world forgot, or at least America forgot, unless you have personal connection to the region. I don’t even know how to end this ask. That’s my confession. You and maybe your followers if you do post this are the only ones who know now and that’s that

I love you, anon. I won't tell you not to but I want you to know - you can still help without volunteering. Donating helps. Spreading awareness helps. You will have nothing to be ashamed for if trying your best does not extend to sacrificing your life. You are still strong and providing desperately needed value.

I just want you to please consider that, okay? You said you don't have many friends - but even though I don't know who you are, you and your life matters to me. If you'd ever like to talk to me you can DM me for my Discord. I'd be happy to be your friend.

If not, that's okay as well. I just want you to know that your life has value, too, even if you help in other ways.

[jechristine]

Looking at it from her perspective

she didn’t promise anything and you know how messed up the industry is looking at it from her perspective ,this is the first casting news we’ve heard in 2 years and she was taking a break but thats still a long time longer than usual she doesn’t have that much power i have a feeling sam levingson is leading a smear campaign behind the scenes based on that article

And if she was casted with a black actor do you honestly think the discourse would be positive “they could of chose someone else” “shes not even black” “she’s stealing roles from others” “her moms white” during the press media would single her out and say shes trying to overshadow others bc she’s lighter everyone would be watching her every move adding to her anxiety and mental health she has to think about her reputation all it takes is for her to say something wrong or do something for twitter to put her in a bad light and then she gets harassed like when law didn’t have a chair and the internet hated on her for a 6 second video and in the context of black/race ppl would bring it up all the time she has to think about her brand/image and protect herself

She’s clearly not getting the roles she wants I think the cast are the least of her worries she just needed something lined up saying this as a black woman i’m exhausted about how people talk about her being biracial it’s a conversation every time she gets casts or wins something i can’t imagine how she feels and it’s not like the black community even claims her half the time it makes sense if you factor the way the community treats her whenever she does speak out it’s bad and wrong so she might as well distance herself and she can avoid backlash she’s a human it’s okay to say something when you were younger and realise that it’s harder than you thought originally, out of all the weird mixed race people in hollywood it feels weird to have this much disappointment for the most sane biracial like she’s said more than others and actions means more but that take time i have no doubt that when she directs she will be hiring poc just cause it’s not happening now doesn’t mean it will never happen

On the bright side her taking another white woman’s place means ayo edibri and quinta can have more roles

.

[andoqin]

List of dramas that I am watching or want to watch, just for personal record reasons:

Cdramas:

The ingenious one (36/36): this drama has blown me away so far with its incredibly nuanced and sharp writing, its love stories between all the major couples and the absolutely magnificent cinematography. FINISHED verdict: HIGHLIGHT drama of the year for me so far. Smart, engaging, complicated, peak romance of all sorts, just what the doctor ordered tbh (overly long review can be found in my tags). 9.5

Chang Feng Du (40/40): I did not realise how close to the end I was. This drama is very pleasant and I adore our mains, but sadly except for a few highlights (the early beating gjs put on himself, the destruction of the gu family and the aftermath, the battle for wangdu) the writing hasn’t been able to keep the narrative tension up which is sad. FINSHED verdict: Very pretty and engaging in the beginning kinda loses me in the second half and then fizzles out emotionally, doesn't crash and burn but doesn't exactly stick the landing either 6.5

Gone with the rain (10/30): adore the gremlin4gremlin couple and from the spoilers I’ve seen not gonna adore much else

An ancient love song (1/16): incredible first episode and with only 30 min per ep and 16 eps in total this is gonna be a short fun ride I hope ( with lots of angst and tears naturally).

Here we meet again (18/32): started this for Wu Qian playing to type and Zhang BinBin being pretty but oh boy I’m struggling I just don’t care about the conflicts and in s surprising twist, I like the flashbacks to high school much much more, which is very funny if you think about the fact that the reason I started liking wu qian in the first place was because of her show stealing performance in the flashbacks of My Sunshine. I’ve been promised kisses in the near future so I’m gonna hold out till then but this might end up another drop.

Hidden Love (5/25): this one promises to be v sweet and kinda short but oh my god I have so many dramas on my plate rn so this might end up the first drop.

Till the end of the moon (22/40): I think I watched ep 1 when it started but then I got busy and now I am just staring at gifsets and crying, it’s definitely on the list to watch tho.

Heroes (6?/38): I started this a while ago, was really into it and then got busy… dammit. I might just rewatch the beginning so I can remember most of the set up for sure but man the visuals on this were so good, aaaa liu yuning.

Blood of youth (0/40): the last 12 months really have spoiled us with interesting looking wuxia dramas and this one is definitely on the list, I have been gifbaited once again.

Ray of light (0/30): usually hs dramas are something I avoid, but because I will not be watching the longest promise, for reasons, and bc @storge is a gifmaking temptress, this has made it on the list.

The legend of anle (0/39): Lmao trust YOUKU to screw up the release with bad subs only 1 ep even for vips and no released schedule… but at least I can put this on the backburner for now. Lmao should have known not to trust a youku dilreba drama, the tl has soundingly spoken and I'm gonna avoid this.

Ancient Detective (0/24): I was recced this by a friend when I mentioned my love for wuxia dramas, and since it’s almost shockingly short for a cdrama it’s on the list. EDIT: this got @purplehanfus seal of approval so it is def going up the list and since it's complete I'll probably at least watch it before the ongoing ones.

Butterflied love (0/22): see I barely made this post and already forgot about the screencap that got me started on writing it, the screencapa look great, but the drama is on mango, so who knows when I’ll truly be able to watch this

When I fly towards you (0/24): Well, I wasn't interested bc modern youth drama, but then I heard it described as "updated It Started with a Kiss" and... I'm weak? ISWAK was pretty much my crack gateway into asian dramas and while IDK if i could rewatch it today, something in me will always love this kind of story. Maybe it's like a quick palate cleanser in between since apparently eps are only about 30 mins.

Mysterious Lotus Casebook(0/40): CHENG YIIIII, in a possibly bromantic role? Or maybe het romance, I'll take it all. Plus I've already seen he's bleeding copious amounts as per his contract, so that's most of the checklist done.

Lost You Forever (0/??): because nature abhors a vacuum I apparently must have?? A minimum to watch pile and this actually and genuinely looks good??? A Yang Zi drama in 2023??? The mind boggles. Anyway I've been reading the recaps with delight, and am def going to watch this when part two airs in a couple of months but until then I have a thankful reprieve...

Kdramas:

See you in my 19th life (4/12): since kdramas release so slowly this is on the backburner but it does have some great gifsets that keep enticing meee

King the land (2/16): I am watching this for junho but it is kinda hard bc I have so much else on my plate and while I don’t mind a classic romcom type story I feel I need a bit more of an emotional hook

Story of the nine-tailed 1938 (0/16): so so many gorgeous and hilarious gifsets so little time. I loved season one so so much and the fact that this focuses on the brotherly relationship?? Extremely smart writing decisions were made!

The red sleeve (0/16): I blame @dangermousie for this she keeps reblogging angsts junho on my dash and I am but god’s weakest warrior.

Love tractor (0/8): gay himbo farmboy falls in love?? You bet this is on the list

Lady durian (0/?): ok this is only on the list for crack reasons but, daughter in law is in love with mother in law and both women are like 40+ truly kdramas have entered a new era and I kinda wanna be here for that

EDIT: Revenant (0/12): Kim Tae Ri in a spooky drama? POSSIBLY POSSESSED KIM TAE RI??? how could i forget to put her on this list, plus it was written by the Kingdom writer and I adore that drama plus it's only 12 eps which is smart in this case so... let's hope i get to it at some point D:

My dearest (2/20): I checked this out because it's got pretty much everything going for it from a production standpoint and boy did the first two eps deliver. This has got 2 seasons though so I'll probably wait until the second season is airing, since it won't be too long till season 2 or so the internet tells me.

My lovely liar (0/16): minhyun learned to act and I wanna see it happen!!

Jdramas:

Our dining table (2/10): ok this category is gonna be a bit shorter bc I haven’t watched too much drama recently but omg the gifs for this I am just crying thinking about it they look so cute??

Jack o‘frost (0/6): people have recced it and it’s short so here it is.

Utsukushii kare s2 (0/4): Season 1 was an unexpected delight so I hope s2 works just as well.

She loves to cook and she loves to eat (0/10): the manga for this is amazing (and hungry making) so I hope this adaptation holds up.

Ok this list is in no way exhaustive (well except for me being exhausted just trying toward this down) and probably subject to change ( I haven’t even looked at thaidramas or twdramas I gotta stop for now) but hopefully this will keep me on the ball and maybe I can add to it whenever a new tempting gifset crosses my dash…

[algolagniaa]

“You know how it is at these things,” you laugh a little apologetically as you make a show of wiping the blood from above your mouth. “Once I get started I just get so carried away.”

The woman in the owl mask nods, a sharp, fierce grin on her face. “I completely understand. What’s the point of the night if not to get carried away?”

“Perhaps the point is avoiding getting carried away?” her companion says under her breath. You’re sure the other woman heard her but she neither responds nor reacts in any way.

“I absolutely must see this Bone Garden,” you say to break the silence, “and by the way, your masks are exquisite.”

“Oh thank you, darling!” she says, reaching up to touch her mask. “Laura doesn’t like using animals, says it’s crass, but I think an owl is perfect for a night like tonight.”

Laura – who you assume is the woman in the floral mask – lets out a longsuffering sigh, but from her slight smile it’s clearly a joke between them. “The Bone Garden is in the conservatory, as she said.”

“The Glass Orchard is lovely too, if you enjoy the more botanical experiences,” the woman in the owl mask adds. “We saw it just at sunset and it was astonishing.” She glances down and says, “Unless you’ve already been? They really are deliciously sharp.”

You hold up your hand to examine it, having almost forgotten how you’d cut it on the wine glass in the tower. There is a small puncture wound on your palm and your hand is smeared with blood just starting to dry. “No, I haven’t had the pleasure,” you say, dropping your hand to your side. “That was from – elsewhere.”

“Have you attended many of the previous Masquerades? I don’t believe we’ve met before,” Laura asks.

“No matter how many times I’ve been here, the Duke manages to make it feel like the first time,” you lie smoothly, and she inclines her head in silent agreement. She watches you carefully, as if trying to see past your mask. Her study of your face reminds you uncomfortably of your experience in the tower and a prickle of discomfort runs down your spine.

“In that case, I’m Charlotte, and this is Laura,” the woman in the owl mask says, beaming as she leans slightly into her companion when giving her name, and you give one of your many pseudonyms in reply.

“Isn’t the point of the masks anonymity? It hardly works if you tell every stranger our names,” Laura asks, and Charlotte dismisses her question with a wave.

“It’s not anonymity from her,” Charlotte argues.

“Traditionalist,” Laura replies with a roll of her eyes.

Charlotte huffs, her breath stirring some of the feathers on her mask. “How can you call me a traditionalist when you know perfectly well that – “

“Are you here with a sponsor?” Laura asks you, cutting off Charlotte, and you detect a hint of some emotion you can’t name. A challenge, perhaps? Or did she simply not want Charlotte to finish her sentence? Charlotte glances at her, but with the mask you can’t read her expression.

They both watch you expectantly. You noticed before how many of the people who appeared new to the Duke’s Masquerade were attending with someone; is this perhaps what she means by “sponsor?” Whatever it means, you get the sense that your answer is significant. How do you reply?

so this ask has been sitting in my inbox all day and I haven’t answered it bc I truly believe there’s no way out of this and I am Caught. obviously she can tell I haven’t been here before and I should have made my excuses back when the glass orchard came up. however it’s too late for that now and I can’t ignore the question or that will make me look much more suspicious. can’t claim I have a sponsor either bc 1) I don’t Want to be marked as prey that sounds like such a bad idea and 2) I don’t have an actual other person with me. saying no has its pitfalls too but if I were actually in this situation my gut instinct with lies is always to just stick to my lie no matter what, so I’m just going to say as little as possible and get out of here as quickly as I can. “No, I’m here alone”.

[feuqueerfire]

January 2024 Movies/Shows Wrap-Up

A little monthly (spoilery!) wrap-up of all the shows, movies, and shorts I’ve watched or am watching in January 2024, general thoughts, and ranking of them all.

Recommendation of the month(s): Bottoms (2023), so fun

Ranking

Beyond Evil (rewatch)

Bottoms (2023) = Twinkling Watermelon (2023)

Death's Game S1 (2023)

Palm Springs (2020)

Love Class 2 (2023) = Death's Game Part 2 (2024)

Skimmed: Bon Appetit (2023)

Average Rating: 6.75/10 [really quite high! Didn't count my Beyond Evil rewatch and Bon Appetit doesn't have a rating]

MDL Updates - Added to Watchlist:

A section because I’m curious about how many shows I decide to add to my Watch List a month and also the ratio of watching them:adding them.

Rookie (2023) - a Phillipino lesbian movie, saw this tiktok and wanted to give it a try

Bon Appetit (2023) - Originally didn't have this on my list because it has a meh MDL rating but this tiktok of guy 1 liking girl liking guy 2 like guy 1 is fun

Kiseki: Dear to Me (2023) - I've seen it mentioned sooo many times that I thought I'd give it a try.

The Guest (2018) - I haven't yet liked a supernatural/fantastical kdrama but maybe this will be the one. Also apparently it's a good bromance that starts off antagonistic

Through the Darkness (2022) - Also a thriller investigation with strong bromance

My Perfect Stranger (2023) - Saw this Tiktok and ended up watching a few more and idk, it reminds me of 18 Again somehow with like younger version and family stuff

Twinkling Watermelon (2023) - same reason as above in terms of plot, it's also in the same tiktok, and it seemed to be very popular among the kdramas this year

Lucky My Love (2023) - wanna watch it cuz it's a GL but unfortunately people don't seem too keen on it :/ oh well, I'll keep it on hand for when I'm craving a GL

Death's Game (2023) - Hadn't heard much about it until I saw Pocha Playlist podcast covering it but I didn't listen to that episode. Then I find out that Lee Dohyun plays a (reincarnation) character in it and now I'm like hmm maybe + the rating and reception seems really good on MDL.

Last Twilight - hmmm people have very polarizing opinions on the last ep (both the disability aspect but also the general storytelling aspect), so I'm cautious but people reallllly love the first 9 episodes. Just adding it here in case I wanna see what the hype was about

The Worst of Evil (2023) - It's in a lot of people's 2023 favourites lists and it seems like a show I'd be into based on genre

The Dude in Me (2019) - a movie about an adult in the body of a teenager, found it from this tiktok with 18 Again and Twinkling Watermelon.

Our Beloved Summer (2021) - I had had this on my to-watch list for a while because I like a post-breakup story and people seem to love this show but had taken it off because I kept not watching it and heard some meh opinions but now it's back again because in Twinkling Watermelon tiktoks, this showed up a couple times in the tiktoks or comments bc people were mentioning Yi Chan and this guy as green flags and shows they loved etc

I Hear Your Voice (2013) - a 2013 drama lol but the Eun Gyeol/Se Kyeong tease in Watermelon Sugar made me remember that I kinda wanna watch noona romance sometimes, so this is for that time. + it's like mystery/suspence plot I think

Death's Game Part 2 (2024)

Youth of May (2021) - Obviously I've heard about this because I was looking for Lee Dohyun shows to watch after 18 Again but idk if I'm up for a tragedy :< but yknow he's in the military now, so maybe I'll watch one of his shows a year to tide me over. Thought of it again because I saw this tiktok when going through LDH tiktok tag

The Good Bad Mother (2023) - This was another case of "When will Lee Dohyun finally again star in a show I wanna watch?" But I saw like 2 mins of this edit on youtube of dude being 7 and ahh it's humorous (Ik it's supposed to be really heavy and traumatizing actually so I avoided it but idk if there's some levity as well and it's really beloved w the 8.9 rating and stuff maybe I'll give it a try to see Lee Dohyun - esp as he's in the military rn). After all, it's not like I knew 18 Again was show/concept I love like this

Lesson in Love (2022) - (240129) Sometimes you just want an uncomfortable and gross relationship... student/teacher noona (well jiejie?) romance and the comments talk about a plot twist (i saw the spoiler lol) anyway... might watch. Saw it first in this Certified Noonas Coming Up live. The student is an adult irl, so I'm gonna just pretend it's that in the show too. Also side note but he was also in Red Balloon and apparently his sister is a lesbian.

To Watch List At Start Of Month: 49

To Watch List At End Of Month: 62

Removed from To Watch List:

Removing these on June 30 because now that I’m getting into kpop as well, my interest in watching dramas isn’t as high and I know I’m probably not gonna get to these.

Nothing ig 

Completely Watched

Bottoms (2023)

Country: USA

Release Dates: Sept 1, 2023 

Watch Via: :>

Watch Dates: Jan 1, 2024

Rating: 7.5/10

Overall Impression: First movie of the year! Very, very funny and wacky, thoroughly enjoyed it. Hazel is sooo attractive lol, as is Isabel. Loved Josie being a sweetheart and reluctant to go along with antics except then going in wayyy too hard with the juvie stories lol. PJ was insufferable but like in a good way? like yesss, high school girl who says things before thinking and is an asshole! Also lesbian movies where they kill men is always fun, this time it being an actual funny comedic part. The whole movie was ridiculous and I'm glad.

tags: bottoms 2023

Palm Springs (2020)

Country: USA

Release Dates: July 10, 2020

Watch Via: :>

Watch Dates: Jan 7, 2024

Rating: 6.5/10 [Mar 11, 2024 Update: Decreased by 0.5 stars: 7 -> 6.5]

Overall Impression: In 2019, I binged Brooklyn 99 like 2-3 times and was obsessed with it and then watched some of Andy Samberg's other stuff and added this to the list of things to watch once it comes out a year later and does its festival tours or whatever... anyway it's now 2024 lol but it was fun! A good mix of the romance and interpersonal relationships with the sciency aspects. I was expecting it to focus more on the characters rather than the science or plot and that struck true, though there were definitely a few interesting bits to chew on in terms of worldbuilding. Funny and charming but not life-changing and predictable but not in a bad way.

Rewatch Beyond Evil: Jan 8 - 12, 2024

It's so fun to rewatch because I catch things that I hadn't before, not just about the case but about the different characters and their storylines. Also, all the stuff from 20 years ago that is repeating now which I'm catching onto earlier because I remember things that haven't been revealed in the show yet.

Han Joo Won continues to be way too naive and self-rightous, even if Lee Dongshik really was the killer. His methods are careless and reckless despite trying to seem rational.

Since I'm watching this after a year and it's a show with many storylines, I'm still extremely engaged lol watching this at 1x speed and watching it all when I expected that I'd be skimming through. I also forgot a lot of the smaller stuff and some of the kinda big middle stuff, so it's fun to rediscover them. Ep 7 ending & Ep 8 beginning are a fucking great combo fr even still.

Rating: still 8/10

Bon Appetit (2023)

Country: South Korea

Release Dates: Sep 27, 2023

Watch Via: :>

Watch Dates: Jan 13 - 14, 2024

Rating: -/10

Overall Impression: Started watching because the guy1 likes girl likes guy2 likes guy1 tiktok was funny but not high hopes for the actual show. Skimmed through this so hard, honestly shouldn't have even watched it because it didn't seem too good from my skimming. The main two characters were cute-ish in the first half of the show and the Yoon Seobin surprise cameo for 2 minutes was fun, but meh otherwise. Skimmed even the main couple scenes in the last 2 eps because random fighting and misunderstandings. Not rating it because I skimmed through like 60% of it lmfao

Twinkling Watermelon (2023)

Country: South Korea

Release Dates:  Sep 25, 2023 - Nov 14, 2023

Watch Via: Viki (paid, so :>)

Watch Dates: Jan 19 - 22, 2024

Rating: 7.5/10

Overall Impression: I'm fucking obsessed with this sort of concept: Parent and child being the same teenage age through some magical concept. It's got a good storyline, hilarious yet touching. I was afraid that they'd make Yi Chan's hearing come back but I'm glad it didn't; it's just something that has to happen to him for no reason the way these things just happen sometimes. The characters were well-crafted and the acting was great. Kinda slow paced, there were certain episodes where I was like nothing really happened, but I guess that's the point of the slice of life aspect in some cases; just watching the characters exist alone and together.I was into the ChCh romance from the get-go and thought they were sooo cute whereas EunEun were a more fun menace pair who I just liked to watch fighting before it gradually became a couple I shipped Very Much. Also, a shoutout to my Se Kyeong (OG, not Eun Yoo) and Chung Ah ship, I can't believe Se Kyeong's first love was her husband instead of Chung Ah. A well-crafted show, good acting, hit some feels and I expect some attachment to it (I'm rewatching and skimming certain parts as I write lol).

tags: twinkling watermelon

Also Appears In: Twinkling Watermelon Live Blogging

Love Class Season 2 (2023)

Country: South Korea

Release Dates:  Aug 11, 2023 - Sep 8, 2023

Watch Via: Viki (paid, so :>)

Watch Dates: Jan 26 - 27, 2024

Rating: 6/10

Overall Impression: I liked the main couple: a younger, insistent pursuer to an older, reluctant hyung who was also his tutor when the younger was in high school. I do wish the random stalker, weird hyung wasn't haunting them for so long though because the premise of this couple is so good. I came around to the second and third couple even though if the show was longer or deeper, I might not have. I was bored by the last 2 eps though, so ehhh

tags: love class 2

Also Appears In: Love Class 2 Live Blogging

Death's Game (2023)

Country: South Korea

Release Dates: Dec 15, 2023

Watch Via: paid, so :>

Watch Dates: Jan 29, 2024

Rating: 7/10

Overall Impression: Weird to rate just this half-show 4 episodes but really good and interesting, I'm enjoying it a lot. My favourite eps are eps 2 and 4, they balanced a good amount of heart with excitement (for ep 2) and plot progression/answers (ep 4 + ofc Lee Dohyun my initial reason for checking out the show). The 18 Again characters/actors are haunting me with this fr.

tags: death's game

Also Appears In: Death's Game Live Blogging

Death's Game Part 2 (2024)

Country: South Korea

Release Dates: Jan 5, 2024

Watch Via: paid, so :>

Watch Dates: Jan 30, 2024

Rating: 6/10

Overall Impression: Firstly, fuck the message of the show. In shows like this, where they treat suicide as a personal, moral failure of selfishness and weakness rather than due to systematic issues in society, mental health struggles, or treating the characters with kindness, it's of utmost importance to just roll your eyes and see the story/acting/etc. Eps 1 to half of 3 were interesting and exciting but in the way of "I'm watching a show with murder and gore and people trying to outsmart each other" rather than about this specific show. The ending is... okay, I guess, expected it. In Part 1, Death just left something to be desired for me and this kinda continued here. Don't think I'll think of this show much (except maybe Lee Dohyun?) and the 2nd part didn't have the excellent pacing of the first one. Not as good as part 1.

tags: death's game

Also Appears In: Death's Game Live Blogging

Post created this month: 2023 Series Overview + Stats

[arandomnerd810]

boring TADC rant(/pos) from a murder drone special interest haver ft lil Caine drawing

i have been absolutely blown away by the reception because i was over here worrying murder drones would overshadow it and lemme tell you i’m glad it didn’t bc i love this show already

bro when i heard my DM talk about it, i saw someone scroll past a TADC video, and comparing the views to Markipliers fnaf 1 video that’s when i realized how insane this is

i don’t get the feeling any more characters will abstract but it would be so fun to watch the fandom go into chaos if anyone did abstract (esp Jax) rlly fun to think about what it so i totally see why it’s a popular topic

i love Gangle and Caine so much i’m exited to see what will happen at the end and to see if i relate to any of the characters and if my favs change + how it will end will they be able to somehow find a way out? (maaaaaybeeee) or will they learn to accept it and make it less bad (the one i’m aiming for but who knows) ? are they all screwed or smth? (least likely in my opinion)

i heard there will be eight episodes with one season and each character will get their own ep so i think it will be structured like each human character gets an ep for them aside from the first ep ( the intro) and the last one (the send off)

i feel like for now Jax the most interesting because i find mean characters the most interesting (my fav characters are still Caine and Gangle for now though lolll)

i wonder if we will get any more LGBTQ+ rep or if Gooseworx is just avoiding saying it to avoid ship wars and or she has not decided yet either way i am very happy with Zooble they are very cool

i got the Caine keychain and i will look forward to solo Gangle merch and the next eps whenever those happen even if it does not end up becoming my special interest

the visuals are eye candy and the music is wonderful

literally my only complaint is sometimes it can be a little over the top goofy (like in the end of the Pomni swearing bit) but i really don’t mind but oof man this is the most honey fandom i’ve seen poor poor Pomni

[slooshee]

i am upset that i just watched a video called "the death of analog horror" where the person talks about the genre becoming stale without even mentioning angel hare or welcome to dreamworld (if you haven't heard of that, it features hunted animatronics, but they still act like people, also all the images are art pieces. check it out if you have the chance) like i know it was probably bc the person just didn't hear about them but the thought of them being obscure also makes me sad :(

So, I actually watched the video you mentioned after I saw this. I’ll be completely honest; I’ve had it in my recommended for a bit now and have been avoiding it. Don’t get me wrong, it’s good to question things (especially things you like) and be critical, but a lot of those videos are always really pessimistic, and kinda overdramatic. And yeah. I dislike this video. Nothing against the creator, of course, he’s just saying his opinion, and I can respect that. He seems to be a fan of horror and this video was probably made from a good place. However, I feel like some of his points might not have been the most informed/researched (like how he showed a 'Mystifying The Oracle' Video as the latest TMC video). Yes, there are a lot of tropes in analog horror and many cliches. But that could be said about literally any genre ever! But regardless people are allowed to dislike cliches. But I personally don’t have an issue with them if you take that idea and do something new with it. I think one of the main reasons I dislike videos like this is because I used to be an analog horror hater. Believe it or not. I thought Analog Horror would be like how cartoon creepypastas were, with bad editing and the same tired cliches with no substance. (Which by the way if you want some fantastic retelling of those creepypastas VibingLeaf’s work is really cool.) I was hesitant about checking out TWF because of how similar it looked to FNAF. But to me, it wasn’t really all that similar once I actually checked it out. And yes, analog horror has cliches. Even some of my favorite series have things I don’t personally like or don’t think are scary in them. But analog horror is so much more than stretched smiles and glitchy TV screens to me. I think one of my favorite things about Analog horror is actually seeing how people take similar or the same concepts and make them their own. Gemini and TMC is such a perfect example of this. I don’t really think agree with saying TMC “improved” upon Gemini because although the “fake people” and “alternates” are similar concepts on the surface, they’re different in how they function and behave. White Stag is a pretty cool series I checked out last night, and I was worried for a second; it was gonna be too similar to TMC or Gemini. But it wasn’t. It has elements I like from TMC or Gemini, but I thought it stood on its own after I watched it all. As you said, there are some great Analog Horror series if you look, like Angel Hare. And I actually have heard of Dreamworld! but I didn’t know it was analog horror :0 I’ve seen a few Rainbott vids and like their work from what I’ve seen so maybe I’ll check it out. But don’t be sad! On the bright side, Angel Hare has been getting a ton of traction thanks to creators showing it to their audiences like Night Mind. I found it through ManlyBadassHero’s playthrough of the game right before it blew up. The East Patch all seem like lovely people and I really wish them all the best I’m excited to see what they make next analog horror or otherwise!