#i’m gonna throw a fucking brick at a window

[23fallencomets]

I FUCKED UP YHE STANDINGS IN WHAT EVER IT TAKES FUCK ME OH MY GODSKAMAKOSOA

i got caught up in the loscar agenda 😭😭 and i’m literally like 2k words from finishing the fucking fic oh my god

like everything ok the excel sheet is correct I JUST DIDNT PAY ATTENTION WJEN I WAS WRITING OH MY LWKZISOWO

[taeghi]

FAST LANE

his criminal background profile || his insta

sunghoon has a need for speed, and yn has a knack for getting under his skin— now they're playing a dangerous game, and the stakes? so much higher than they expected.

pairing : car thief!sunghoon x sarcastic!yn

genre : smut, light humour?? idk angst

wc : 12k.

part of the criminal love series

minors DO NOT interact!!!!

you swing open the backdoor of the club and it hits the brick wall behind it, but you don’t care. you just want to get the hell out of there. you huff and pull out your pack of cigarettes, putting it in your mouth and lighting it. 

when the nicotine enters your lungs, you start to feel a little less overwhelmed. 

you pull out your phone, briefly looking over all your unanswered texts that you’ve sent to your friends. they had begged you to come out with them tonight, but within the first hour all three of them had ditched you for some random guys. 

“fuck this weekend,” you mutter to yourself, exhaling the smoke frustratingly. 

the backdoor of the club leads to a practically deserted street that only has one street lamp that lights up the space around you.  you open the uber app and call one for yourself, wanting to just go home and go to bed. you can hear the slight thump of the bass from the music in the club behind you and some traffic from the nearby streets. you confirm your ride after you sigh at the price of it. 

then, a sudden movement in your peripheral vision takes your attention away from worrying about your bank account to looking across the street. you see a figure in all black hunched over a parked, black car. you can tell from his movements that he’s obviously trying to pick the lock. 

you glance both ways down the street to see if anyone else is seeing what you’re seeing, but it’s just as dead as it was when you came out. there’s no one around except for you and this apparent car thief. 

“you’re joking,” you mutter, the cigarette between your lips wobbling as you speak. 

you take a moment to consider your options. you know you should just ignore him and wait for your uber to take you to your warm bed. but the way he’s so obviously picking the lock of this car annoys you. 

you huff in frustrations before you take the first step off the club’s step and walk across the street to the thief in all black. 

“you know, breaking into cars is illegal,” you say, loud enough for him to hear you. he doesn’t let go of the car handle as he turns to look at you. 

he gives you a once-over, basically judging your appearance with not a hint of shame. a small grin spreads across his face, “oh really? thanks for the legal advice, counselor.” 

you can’t help but contort your face into one of disgust at his response. you cross your arms over your chest as you stay put. the man seems so casual and confident about breaking into this car with you standing right there. he seems almost amused by your presence. 

“well i’m just saying, if you’re gonna break into a car, maybe make sure no one else is around.” 

he doesn’t say anything but he laughs lowly as he finally pops open the car’s lock. he swings open the door and leans on it with an accomplished expression on his face. his stance allows the distant street light to gleam over his face, letting you get a better look of his face. his sharp jawline, deep brown eyes and moles make him insanely hot. 

“you should get out of here, sweetheart,” he says honestly, “a pretty girl like you shouldn’t be caught up at a crime scene.” 

you scoff, not believing the criminal is telling you what to do, “i can do what i want.” 

his face only stays in his amused expression, “well of course,” he spins and bends down to sit in the driver’s seat, “but you know smoking cigarettes is bad for you.”

your lips curl in annoyance from his mocking. before you can say anything else to the criminal, he’s slamming the door shut and throwing the car into drive. he winks at you through the window before he steps on the gas, taking off down the street. 

suddenly, a honk from behind startles you and forces you to turn around. your uber is pulled over, the driver calling you over. you whip your head back around to see the car thief, but his fast car is long gone. 

you huff and walk to your uber, getting in the backseat and saying hello to the driver. you settle into the seat as your driver pulls off the curb and you notice the way your skin is pringling. the adrenaline rushing through you causes your heart to stutter in your chest. all you can think of is the thief and the way he was so nonchalant and confident throughout the entire encounter. you had never met someone like him before. 

you try to relax, wanting to shake off the adrenaline so you can crawl into bed as soon as you get home.

you didn’t even want to go out tonight in the first place. 

the next week, your friends had somehow dragged you to another club with the promise of  “this one will be better”. you’re not there for long and you’re already regretting agreeing to come. you head to the bar for another drink. 

you tell the bartender your order and he turns to start to make it. you notice a man standing beside you, and when you look at him, you instantly recognize him. it’s him. the car thief from the week before. the man you’ve been thinking about all week. 

his eyes find yours instantly, noticing your staring, and the smirk you’ve memorized spreads slowly across his face, “so… you’re stalking me now?”

you snort, “in your dreams.” 

he leans  in closer to you, to make sure that you can hear him over the music, “well i wouldn’t mind dreaming about you.” 

you choose to ignore him, “aren’t you worried i might, i don’t know… spill your little car-stealing secret?” 

“no”

“and why not?” 

you watch as his eyes scan your entire face, and then swivel down to your body. you feel your cheeks lighten because of him practically analyzing your entire being with no shame. 

“that’ll be eight bucks,” the bartender's voice beats you to saying anything. before you can reach for your wallet, the thief is dropping the money on the counter. you open your mouth to stop him, but the bartender scoops up the money and leaves to serve another customer. 

“y/n! what’s taking so long? come dance with me!” your friend’s impatient voice is clear in your ear as her hand lands on your shoulder and spins you around to face her. you turn your head back around to where the thief was standing, but of course, he’s already gone. 

your friend narrows her eyes, “who was that guy?” 

“i don’t know… but he bought me a drink.” 

your friend nudges you, wiggling her eyebrows, but you just laugh her off. you lead her back to your friend group so you can all dance again. but throughout the whole night, you find yourself glancing over your shoulder, searching for a glimpse of the car thief in the crowd. he never reappears, and you’re left with a weird mix of disappointment and relief. 

after all, he is a criminal, why would you be looking for him?

“night guys!” you call out to the rest of your coworkers, who have to stay late to clean the kitchen. 

you had to stay late at work tonight since saturday nights are usually the busiest time for you. so when you step out into the cool night air and away from the sweaty kitchen, you instantly need to light up a cigarette to take the edge off. you tuck your apron into your purse as you take the first puff for your walk home. 

you don’t get far into your smoke or walk before you hear the engine of a car pull up beside you. you don’t recognize the car, but you sure enough recognize the driver. his cocky grin fills his entire face as he leans on his elbow against the open window. 

“really? you stalking me now?” you question him as he slows down the car, matching your walking pace. 

“want a ride? or are you just gonna walk all night?” 

you don’t slow down, keeping your walking pace steady as you drag on your cigarette. you’re trying your best to not look so affected by his presence. “i can walk. unlike you, i don’t need a stolen car to get places.” 

he laughs and it makes your stomach flip. “okay, but this one isn’t stolen, sweetheart.” 

your eyes narrow at the pet name, but you don’t slow down your pace, “yeah, right.” 

“seriously!” he insists, “it’s my friends! he let me borrow it!” you glance at him, and he can tell you’re not convinced. “i swear! i wouldn’t let you get in a stolen car.” 

the last part makes something shift inside of you– something similar to disappointment. but you stop walking, mid-step, like your body’s decided before your mind has even begun to process it. 

he notices, and the car comes to a smooth stop right beside you. the street is silent, and it’s just you and him looking at each other, waiting. 

“okay, let me in.” 

he doesn’t hesitate to reach over the centre console and open the door for you at your request. 

you slide into the passenger seat and settle in, the car’s leather seats are cool beneath– but it’s a lot warmer in the car than it is outside. you shut the door, and without missing a beat, the thief shifts gears and pulls away from the curb. the city lights flicker past you as the car picks up speed quickly. 

you direct him towards your apartment as he tears down the streets. you wish he wouldn't drive so fast, just so that you could stay beside him longer. 

“so, why’re you walking so late at night anyways, don’t you know it’s dangerous?” he says, questioning you. 

“i got off work late.” 

“where do you work?” 

“ronnie’s,” you say, gesturing down the street behind you, “you know, down the block.” 

he nods, he knows the exact place. 

“why are you driving around so late?” you question him now. 

he shrugs, “had stuff to do.” 

“like what? stealing cars?” 

he laughs over the steering wheel, “no, not tonight. i had to pick up a payment for one.” you roll your eyes and scoff, turning to look out the window again. “what? you were the one who asked.” 

you don’t say anything in response. you’re second guessing as to why you even got in the car with him. you know that he’s bad news– but you’ve been so intrigued by him since you first met. he talks too casually about what he does, he’s completely fearless. 

“so, why do you steal cars, anyways?” 

he doesn’t need to think about his answer, he keeps the  fast speed of the car  as he answers, “because i need the money. and it’s a lot of money, and it’s quick.” 

you glance over at him, your curiosity creeping in about him and the cars. you wonder how much money he gets. “how do you even do it?” 

he glances at you, a doubtful look on his face, “i’m not telling you.” 

“why not?” 

the criminal doesn’t shift his focus from the road as he smirks, “because you’d get caught– and you shouldn’t always be in dangerous situations.” 

you scoff, “i am not always in a dangerous situation.” 

he dryly chuckles as he rests his elbow on the window, his head falling to his arm, “are you forgetting that you i met you because you walked up to me while i was literally committing a crime?” 

your mouth gaps open but nothing comes out. you can’t find anything to say, so you instead cross your arms tighter and look back out the window. you don’t mean to be in “dangerous” situations, but you can’t help but crave something new and adventurous sometimes. 

the rest of the drive to your apartment is silent besides the low volume of the radio playing some song you don’t know. thankfully, since he’s speeding, so you get to your apartment quickly so you can get out of this awkward hell. part of you wants to run out of the car as soon as he stops, but the other part of you wants to stay with him for longer. you want to talk with the man who’s been taking up your mind for weeks now. 

but, when the car slows to a stop outside of your apartment, your hand is quick to reach the door handle. you look at him, not knowing exactly what to say besides, “thanks.” 

he smirks at you, “just, stay out of trouble, sweetheart.” 

“my name is y/n! stop calling me that.” 

the thief’s smile turns into a mischievous smile and you hate that it makes your heart skip a beat, “i’m sunghoon.” 

sunghoon. the name rings in your head. you hadn’t expected him to have such a soft name. you can’t decide if it suits him or not. you stand up out of his car and onto the sidewalk. 

“good night, y/n.” 

“night, sunghoon.” 

you turn and head to the front door of your apartment building. you don’t hear the loud screech of the car’s tires until you’re safely inside.

you’re walking home from your friends house, your lighter is almost out of fuel as you try to light your cigarette. the lit cigarette lights up your face in the dark night. you pass by the city’s old car dealership– the one who’s always trying to sell some broken down car– and you see the all too familiar figure in all black, hunched over a black sedan. 

you smirk around your cigarette, shaking your head as you cross the empty street and duck through the gate of the dealership. 

“really?” you ask, your hand on your hip as you watch him jump slightly. he glances over his shoulder in shock, but once he realizes it’s you, you can see his whole body relax. 

“why’re you here?” 

“because i saw you.” 

he rolls his eyes as he goes back to picking the sedan’s lock, “you’re not helping me jack this car, y/n.” 

you can’t hide the annoyed pout on your face, “who said i wanted to?” 

you hear sunghoon chuckle deeply, his attention on the lock as he speaks, “because i can tell you want to. and beside the fact that you’re still standing here while i commit a crime and you’re not screaming for help.” 

“well, i can scream for help if you want me to.” 

sunghoon glances over his shoulder at you, an annoyingly amused smirk on his face, “you wouldn’t dare.” 

your eyes narrow in response, you don’t like how he can seemingly always look right through you. it’s like he knows that all week, the thought of the large amount of money you could make by stealing one car has kept you up at night. how just one theft could change your financial life, just for a bit. money has always been tight for you, you’ve always lived paycheck to paycheck since you were a child. so, stealing one car with him wouldn’t hurt anyone, but it would help your wallet. 

then, a loud bang echoes through the dealership. it makes both you and sunghoon jump back as it cuts through the quiet night. 

“who’s out here? you better leave!” an angry, male voice yells out to the parked cars. 

before you could react, sunghoon is pulling  you down to the pavement with him, using the sedan to cover yourselves from the man’s view. you glance at sunghoon, who only brings his index finger to his mouth to signal for you to stay quiet. his hand is still on your wrist as you both crawl to the passenger side of the sedan. 

you can feel your heartbeat pick up it’s pace as you hide, pressed up against the sedan’s cool metal. you’re sure your eyes are blown out in fear. sunghoon looks the complete opposite of you. his eyes are steady and his hands are shaking like yours are. your heavy breaths make sunghoon look at you, quickly covering your mouth with his warm hand. 

you hear footsteps approaching your position, rocks rolling as the man’s foot kicks them with his steps. and then– a metallic click. a gun. 

if it wasn’t for sunghoon’s hand over your mouth, you think you would’ve screamed. you stay quiet, your eyes locked on sunghoon’s clam ones ass you listen to the man’s footsteps. they seem tomove farther away from the sedan. sunghoon pulls his hand away from you, “stay here.” 

before you could protest, he slips around the car, leaving you alone against the car, imagining what would happen if the man with the gun catches you. you force yourself to be quiet, waiting for anything to happen, telling yourself that sunghoon’s got it under control. 

then, the passenger door by your head clicks open. sunghoon is in the car, waving his hand for you to get in, “quick.” with no hesitation, you jump inside the car, closing the door after you as quiet as possible. you duck down, trying to hide against the seat. sunghoon is working underneath the steering wheel– until the engine comes to life, breaking any silence that was left in the dealership. 

“hey! what do you think you’re doing?” the man’s voice is louder and even more angry as sunghoon steps his foot on the pedal, causing the car to rush forward. sudden gunshots make you flinch as sunghoon drives forward, ripping through the gates and floors it onto the empty streets. you can’t count how many gunshots you heard, they kept firing after the car until finally the dealership was out of sight. your grip on the door handle beside you makes your knuckles turn white. 

the car’s speed scares you as sunghoon swerves through the city. he keeps switching his attention from the street in front of him to you beside him. 

“are you okay? are you hurt?” his voice comes out as frightened and rush, the first time you’ve seen him like this. 

“i’m fine, i’m fine! just– drive!” you force it out so he can focus on driving and getting you the hell out of there. 

sunghoon nods and steps on the gas some more, speeding through the city. you can barely see anything out the window from how fast sunghoon is driving– only flashes of the lights from the street lamps and stores. he’s quick to leave the city, driving down dirty country roads where the lights turn into tall dark trees. 

sunghoon stops the car when a break in the trees is found. he pulls the car into it and you can see the entire city below you. everything is quiet now that you’re away from the city. he cuts the engine. 

your chest is still heaving from the adrenaline when you look over at him, his eyes looking at yours at the same time. when you look at him, the mood in the car changes from panic to relief. relief that you got away, that sunghoon got away safely.

you’re the first one to let out a little chuckle, realization starting to take over. but then sunghoon cracks his own smile,  a laugh following soon after. then, the car is filled with both of you losing it, your eyes squinting from laughing so hard in realizing what had just happened. the adrenaline rush has turned from fear into excitement. 

before you can even think, your hands cup his face, pulling him into you. your lips impulsively kiss his, feeling his warm ones on your cold ones. but then, your face starts heating up in embarrassment when you’ve realized what you’ve done. you practically jump away from him, pressing yourself up against the passenger door behind you. 

“sorry, sorry! i was just—,” you stutter, trying to find an explanation, “i mean, we just got away! and i was so happy that—” 

before you could finish your ramble, sunghoon leans over the centre console and presses his lips back onto yours. this kiss is more certain and confident than yours. his eyes are closed as his lips work against yours, and yours soon follow once the shock has faded. 

sunghoon pulls away slightly, his forehead resting on yours as his dark eyes look into yours. you can tell that his breathing is heavier than usual, like his composure has finally dissipated. you can only stare back at him, your eyes shifting from his eyes to lips that you want to feel again so badly. 

“what… what’re you doing?” you ask him, not expecting his reaction. 

your breath hitches when you feel his hands move to your face, his thumb brushing over the top of your cheek. he’s so close to you, you can hardly think. he murmurs quietly, “you make me lose all control, y/n.” you can tell from his eyes that he’s being honest– and it scares him and you. “everytime i’m around you, or even look at you… i have to remind myself to focus.” 

his forehead is still resting on yours as he speaks. you’re sure he can hear how quick your poor heart is beating. “sunghoon,” you say his name but that’s all that comes out. 

he smirks at your lack of words, his thumb tracing along your jaw, “you’re way too good for me, sweetheart,” he lets his eyes close as he finishes the sentence, “but i need you so bad.” 

“are you… are you serious?” 

sunghoon chuckles softly, “of course i am,” his fingers brush back the strand of hair on your face, “i’ve wanted you since the first time i saw you— but, i shouldn’t be allowed to want you. i’m not good for you.” 

you see the way his eyes tense at his confession, his jaw tightening. “you can want me, sunghoon. i want you too, so much.” 

he lets out a slow breath, his hands sliding down your body and around your waist, “if we start this, y/n, id ont think i’ll be able to stop.” his voice is full of longing and precaution. 

“then don’t.” 

your lips meet again almost instantly— the final strand holding sunghoon back breaks. the kiss is much rougher than the last two, setting the pace for the rest of the time you have in the stolen car. 

“you’re so beautiful, you know that, right?” sunghoon’s deep voice asks, his hot skin warm against yours. you want to respond, but he’s quick to gather your lips in his again. he doesn’t hesitate to push his tongue inside your mouth. he starts exploring your mouth, and you let him. wanting to taste him just as much as he wants to taste you. 

sunghoon’s hand starts to slide down your neck, making you shiver. he tugs at the bottom of your shirt before he lifts it so it pools at your neck, making your breasts exposed. his fingers hurriedly brush against your newly bare skin. you’ve wanted this for such a long time, every movement of his leaves you squirming with anticipation. you’ve thought about this man every night since you’ve met him in that empty street all those weeks ago. “so fucking pretty,” he whispers, his breath hot as it fans against your neck. you can’t help but let out a soft moan of his name as he cups your breast in his large palm. 

“it feels that good already, sweetheart?” he teases you, his voice is hoarse when he speaks. the nickname makes you whine out. it’s been repeating in your mind since the first he’s called you it. you nod, unable to form words as pleasure surges through your body. his touch is firm and rough, and you need more of him. 

sunghoon leans over your body, gathering your mouth in a hungry kiss. the intensity between you is increasing rapidly. you’re quick to kiss him back this time. your hands aren’t shy anymore— you tangle them in his hair and pull him closer. everything about him is so addicting. 

sunghoon breaks away from the kiss to get air and starts leaving a trail of wet kisses down your jawline, nipping and sucking on it, “i want to taste every inch of you— mark you everywhere.” he murmurs, his hands now on the button of your jeans, unbuttoning it. you don’t stop him from sliding the denim down your hips until your bottom half is only in your panties.

“you’re so fucking wet,” he growls out, his fingers dipping into the damp fabric, stroking your slick folds. “i can’t wait to feel you around me.” his words have you keen, your body needing him more than you had thought. 

he pulls your panties to the side, exposing your sopping pussy. he starts to tease your entrance with his fingers, circling your clit. the smallest touch from him has you gasping and writhing against the stolen car’s seat already. “please,” you beg, your voice desperate.  

“not yet, sweetheart,” his whispers to you with a tsk, “i want to make you beg for it.” with that, he slides two fingers inside you, curling them to find your sweet spot. he starts to pump his fingers in and out, his thumb working your clit in circles at the same time. 

your head is thrown back against the window already. the feeling of his long, slim fingers inside of you have your knees shaking on either side of his body. you can’t stop the whimpers of his name falling from your lips. 

sunghoon starts to pound his two fingers in and out of your soaking core. the squelching sound of his fingers entering and exiting filled the stolen car. your cries increased and you started bucking your hips up and off the seat, trying to match his pace. 

he only chuckled darkly at your movements, “relax, relax.” he said, his pace slowing down as he leaned over you and pressed his lips to yours. your eyes close instantly, taking in the feeling of his lips on yours and his fingers rubbing your g spot. 

“i’m, i’m close.” you whimper out to him when he pulls back. your eyebrows furrow as his thumb starts to rub circles on your clit again. 

“hold it for a bit,” sunghoon asks, “i wanna take my time with you.” is lips start pressing kisses into your neck again, biting and sucking on the skin. he wants to leave as many marks as he can— wants you to remember him everytime you look in the mirror. his hand moving quickly in between your legs kept you in place, pressed against the passenger side door. the window cool on your warm, sweaty back. 

“i c-can’t!” you cry out, you feel your orgasm approaching so strong and quick. 

you see his eyes darken at your confession, it makes your heart pick up pace as you watch a smirk spread across his lips before he speaks, “are you not gonna be a good girl for me, y/n?” the words rush through you and straight to your core, you’re sure he can feel the way your pussy throbs around his fingers even more. “are you not gonna listen to me, sweetheart?” 

you try to answer him but his fingers are working viciously on your pussy; two fingers continuously pounding into you whilst his thumb rubs circles all over your clit, so messily. 

sunghoon doesn’t like your lack of response, and suddenly his hand is around your neck, choking you with your head pressed against the window behind you. his fingers on his other hand don’t leave your tight walls. “i think you should listen to me, y/n. because sluts don’t get to cum, do you understand?” 

“y-yes,” you try to nod, but his hands wrapped around your neck forbid you. 

a smile spreads on his lips again, “good girl.” 

sunghoon leans down and kisses your harshly. he’s all over your body, taking control of all of your senses. he’s fingers are massaging your mesh walls, his thumb is spreading your juices all over your clit. his hand is threatening the oxygen to your head and his lips are taking your breath away. he’s all that you can think about. 

“you don’t like following orders unless it gets you to cum, is that right?” his voice is deep in your ear when he pulls away from your lips again. his tongue is trailing under your jaw. 

“n-no!” 

his teeth bite down on your jaw at your answer, “oh c’mon, y/n. don’t act like you’re not a slut for me. look at you, your legs spread open for me, tits out,” he leans down and sucks a nipple into his mouth briefly, causing you to cry, “admit that you like being fucked like a whore.” 

sunghoon’s degrading only makes your core focus more on your orgasm, your brain becoming hazy as the pleasure continues to take over your body. 

“answer me,” 

all you could do was nod with a weak whimper leaving your mouth. your body felt like it was on overdrive as you tried to hold back your orgasm for him, so you could be his good girl. 

“say it, say that you’re my slut.” 

“i-i’m, your s-slut!” you practically yell out into the car. you could feel the sweat dripping down your forehead– the windows fogging up, just from your breath. 

“good girl,” sunghoon smiles darkly. his hand suddenly starts to pound so hard into your pussy. your body was jerking up against the seat with every thrust of his hand. “now, beg me to let you cum.” 

“p-please!” 

sunghoon only chuckles, “oh c’mon, i know you can do better than that, sweetheart.” 

you swallow harshly, “please, l-let me cum, i need it so bad, sir.” 

the name falls out of your mouth so willingly that it makes that evil, lust filled look in his eye turn even darker. “then cum, whore.” 

with his permission, the overwhelming wave of pleasure crashes over you. “oh god!” you cry out. your body starts convulsing as your orgasm tears through you. your head is thrown back against the cold, passenger window. his fingers are relentless, fucking into you until you have to pull his fingers out of you. 

you feel your tired pussy gaping around nothing as you keep your legs spread, your body still as you try to calm down from your high. in the moonlight, you can see sunghoon’s fingers glistening. 

you watch as he brings his fingers to his mouth, sucking your juices off with a satisfied grin. “fuck you taste so good.” he moans around his own fingers, his eyes never leaving yours. 

once your juices are off his fingers, and before you can catch your breath, sunghoon is grabbing your waist and pulling you across the centre console and placing you right on his lap. you straddle him, feeling his hard length straining against his jeans. “i want you to ride me, sweetheart.” his voice commands, filled with authority. 

you reach down, your fingers shaking as they reach for his zipper. you so desperately want to feel his hard cock inside of you. sunghoon helps with the zipper, his neediness makes him impatient, too. 

in a second, his cock springs free from his jeans and you can see that the tip is already glistening with his precum. you can’t help but let out a quiet gasp at the sight. your pussy clenches around nothing but the thought of him stretching you open. 

sunghoon guides your hips, positioning his cock at your entrance. he goes slow, not wanting to overstimulate your pussy too much. your body slowly slides down, taking him deep inside of you. you both groan in unison as he fills you, stretching you perfectly. 

“fuck, you’re so tight,” he practically moans out, his head falling back onto the driver’s seat. you glance down at his exposed neck and you can’t help but reach down and press a deep kiss into the soft, smooth skin. his hand slinks through your hair, keeping you there, letting you leave your mark on him. “you’re so hot.”

when you’re done and you sit up again, your lips are swollen from leaving the now red mark on his neck. you’ve now adjusted to his size, feeling every vein and ridge of his thick shaft. 

“move, sweetheart.” he growls now, wanting you to set the pace for him. and you oblige. 

you lift your hips up and then sink back down, taking him in a slow, deliberate stroke. his cock glides in and out of you, rubbing against your sweet spots, sending pleasure coursing through your body. 

sunghoon leans forward, his mouth capturing one of your nipples, sucking and biting. “you feel so good– so much better than i even thought.” your pussy clamps down around his cock at the mention of him thinking about what your pussy would feel like. the image of his hand wrapped around his cock, late at night, moaning your name and fucking his cock into his hand, thinking about your pussy. “yeah? you like knowing that i think about your pussy? think about you?” 

you nod, your breaths quickening, “i think about you, too. i wanted to your cock inside of me for so long.” 

sunghoon smiles at your confession, and reaches up to gather your lips against his again. you quicken your pace, riding him harder, your breasts bouncing with each thrust. the car is filled with the sounds of flesh slapping against flesh, your moans and his deep whispers. 

“fuck, that’s it, take my cock, y/n. it’s all yours.” he encourages you, his hands squeezing your ass, guiding your movements. 

the pressure builds again, an intense pleasure coiling low in your belly. "i'm gonna cum," you pant, your body on the brink of another orgasm.

“fuck, okay,” sunghoon speaks breathlessly, “cum with me.” he grips your hips tightly, helping you by lifting you slightly and then slamming you back down onto his cock. he starts pounding into your from below, his cock thrusting deep, hitting all the right spots. 

you cling to his shoulders, your nails digging into his skin as the pleasure becomes almost unbearable. "oh, fuck!" you cry out, your body trembling as the orgasm engulfs you. sunghoon grunts, his hips snapping up, driving his cock even deeper as he spills his hot cum inside you. 

you lean down to rest your head on his shoulder, your body weak. both of your chests are heaving against each other as you try to catch your breaths. sunghoon rubs his hands up and down your back, soothing your weak body. 

when you feel strong enough again you start to lift your hips up and sunghoon helps you. he sets you down on the passenger seat before he starts looking through the car for something to wipe the mess between your legs. he finds some tissues in the glove department and he smiles sheepishly at you before he starts gently wiping the sticky cum and juices off of your core. 

both of you fix your clothes and you’re left in silence, the windows slowly unfogging so you can see the city down below again. 

as you sit in the passenger seat, the silence feels thick, like neither of you knows what to say. you keep your hands tight together in your lap. 

“i should uh, get you home.” sunghoon finally speaks, and you notice how he can barely look at you. 

“uh sure, right.” 

when he starts to drive again, he just stares straight ahead, one hand gripping the steering wheel as he changes the channel on the radio, which is playing some retro love song you’ve never heard before. 

you shift in your seat, feeling anxiety creep up your spine. this wasn’t supposed to feel so intense. all you’d wanted was a little adventure, a bit of cash, and maybe some time to you look at the car thief who you found insanely attractive. 

you never thought sunghoon, with his impossible calm and that quiet confidence, would actually… want you back. but tonight, he let his cool, calm and collected demeanor drop— just for you. and now you’re left with wondering what it could mean. 

he pulls up to your apartment building not long after you start to see the city lights again. he taps his fingers against the steering wheel, glancing at the dashboard instead of you. “so…” he says, his voice softer than usual. “i guess i’ll see you around.” 

“yeah.” you nod, gripping the door handle, feeling like you’re supposed to say something but coming up blank. “thanks for the… ride.” the words feel so lame, but what else is there to say?

he gives you a tiny smile, the corner of his mouth quirking up. “sure. anytime.”

a pause stretches between you, long enough that it feels like maybe one of you should say something—anything—to break the weird tension. but instead, you just close the passenger door of the stolen car and give a small wave to him as you turn and walk toward your apartment. 

tonight, he drives away before you can even enter the apartment building.

you haven’t seen the car thief, sunghoon, in two whole weeks. 

you’ve replayed that last night with him multiple times in your head, you’re sure you haven’t forgotten a single detail. still, you think about all the “what ifs” of that night. all the things you should or would have done differently. you shake your head, cringing at yourself for the hundredth time. 

it’s late now, another night where you’re practically dragging yourself home from work. you’re wondering how your life can feel so hard and boring all at once. you tug your purse over your shoulder tightly and start your walk home, telling yourself to not get stuck on the thought of sunghoon again. 

and then, like your life is some huge joke, a car pulls up beside you. you don’t even have to look to know who’s inside. 

before you can finish telling yourself to not glance over at the car, you glance over. your heart stutters when sure enough, sunghoon is sitting in the driver's seat of the car. he has that annoying smirk on his face that you’ve gone back and forth of hating and loving. 

still, the hurt of being ignored by him for two weeks after you fucked is still fresh. you scoff, rolling your eyes as he slows down beside you.

“what’s with that? aren’t you happy to me?” he says, his lips forming into an exaggerated pout. 

you tell yourself to not look at him and to keep walking home, “no.” 

“no?” he mocks, pretending to be offended, “don’t tell me it’s ‘cause i didn’t call you! i didn’t have your number, y/n!”

“it’s not that,” you mutter, not sure if you’re even telling the truth yourself.

“oh, really?” he says, tilting his head. “then why don’t you get in the car?” you shrug him off and keep walking. “what, you’re suddenly scared of getting into a stolen car?” he teases, grinning. “this one’s my friend’s.”

you glance at the car, recognizing it instantly—yeah, it’s his friend’s. he used  it once to drive you home last month. you say nothing, eyes forward, and keep walking.

“c’mon, y/n,” his voice softens, the car matching your walking pace beside you. “don’t be like. i’m sorry! just get in, and we’ll talk.” 

“you didn’t have my number, but you knew where i lived.” you raise a brow, finally looking over at him, and he falls silent. he bites his lip, knowing that you’re right and he could’ve talked to you a lot sooner than two weeks later. 

still, he doesn’t give up. “please, y/n, just get in. we can talk.” you don’t answer, the thoughts in your head are so conflicting. mentally switching between how hurt you’ve been to how addicting his touch is. “i’ll buy you food.”

you pause, narrowing your eyes at him. at the mention of food, though, he knows he’s won. he stops the car, smiling in victory as he gestures to the passenger side. “get in.” 

with an exasperated sigh you walk over and slip into the seat, you hate how hungry you are right now.

you sit in the passenger seat as you finish your burger that sunghoon had bought you. 

when you’re both done, sunghoon leans back in his seat and glances over at you. his eyes are aching as they meet yours, “i’m sorry i didn’t come to see you sooner.” 

you just give him a skeptical “hm” in response, raising a brow as you wipe your hands on a napkin.

he sighs again. “i’ve just been… stressed. busy. work’s been a lot and i didn’t want to get you wrapped up in this mess. last time we were together, i felt like i did just that—dragged you right into the middle of all this car-theft stuff. you don’t deserve any of that, y/n. i just want you to be safe.”

 “i understand that, but i’m an adult. i can make my own decisions, you know? and so can you, by the way. you could’ve come to see me, especially after… well, after what we did last time.”

he looks away, guilt flickering across his face as he nods, biting his lip. “i know. i just… i like you, y/n. a lot. and i wish my life wasn’t such a complete shit show right now.”

“my life’s a mess, too. but i’d still make an effort to see you.”

sunghoon sighs, “i know, i know. i messed up, okay? i handled it all wrong, and i’m sorry. okay? i’m sorry.”

you don’t say anything right away, just look down at your drink, setting it carefully in the cup holder. “okay,” you finally say. there’s a mix of relief and caution settling in your chest. sunghoon is complicated, and so are your feelings for him.  “have you ever thought about, like… you know, just having a normal job? a normal life?”

sunghoon snorts, “yeah i tried that, but not many people want to hire a guy who doesn’t even have a high school diploma.” you nod in understanding, so he continues, “and why do you want to steal cars? and don’t say you don’t want to—i saw how excited you were when we drove off a few weeks ago.”

you bite your lip, debating how much to actually tell him. you don’t share much with, well anyone. his pleading eyes convince you to tell him some parts, “well i’ve been on my own since i was 16, so money’s always been tight. so i just needed some more money. i’m sick of working all day, every day, just to go home, sleep, and start all over. i wanted… something different. something exciting.”

sunghoon listens, but looks away, shaking his head with a small smile, “y/n, i get it,” he says, sighing. “but crime isn’t exactly the way, you know? it’s bad, it’s dangerous.”

you laugh, raising an eyebrow. “right. you’d know all about being bad, wouldn’t you?”

his smirk flickers, and he doesn’t deny it. instead, he just watches you quietly for a second, his expression unreadable, “okay but,” he mutters under his breath, “but it’s different now. ever since i’ve met you, you make me want to be good.” 

something in his voice makes your stomach flip. you’re both happy and scared at the same time. you’re trying not to grin, but his hand comes up, gently tucking a stray strand of hair behind your ear, and you can’t help it. it’s what you’ve wanted to hear from him. the look in his eyes is warm and knowing. 

before you can think twice, he leans in, close enough that you catch a hint of his cologne, and then he kisses you, his lips as soft as you remembered. and in that moment, you both know you’re already deeper than you meant to be. 

your lips barely part from sunghoon’s when the screech of tires slices through the air, and suddenly, the night feels way too quiet again. you both freeze, eyes snapping to the headlights of a dark car that pulls into the parking lot.

you barely have time to react as the car comes to a stop. three men step out, all of them wearing expressions that scare you as they start to approach you and sunghoon. they have nasty scowls on their faces and it makes your heart beat rapidly in your chest. 

sunghoon shifts, stepping out of the car without looking at you, without saying a word. he looks just as terrifying as the three men do. he’s tense and so are you. 

"you really thought you could mess with us and get away?" one of them sneers as they look at sunghoon like he’s already dead and it sends a chill through your body. 

“sunghoon, let’s just go! please!” you call out to him from inside the car. 

the guy who spoke first takes a step towards the car, putting his hand on the roof as he bends down to look at you through the window. his eyes are wild and a terrifying smirk spreads on his lips, “oh, you’ve got a pretty girl with you tonight, huh park?” 

sunghoon instantly shoves the guys shoulder to get him away from the car. and before you can blink, the other two men are pulling out guns, aiming them directly at sunghoon. 

“don’t talk to her.” sunghoon’s voice is stern and cold as he ignores the guns and stares right at the man who spoke to you. 

“relax, relax,” the man’s voice is calm, “we’re not here for her, we’re here for you. because you’re the one who messed with all our engines, right? all the engines to the cars that we can’t sell now.” 

you see sunghoon’s jaw clench, his hand flexing at his side. you’re unable to move, unable to think of anything except the fact that sunghoon’s standing there, unarmed, against three men with guns.

"you shouldn't have come here," sunghoon finally says, his voice low, "you're making this worse for yourselves."

the guy closest to him scoffs, taking a step closer. "worse for us? you’re the one who made this personal, park. we’re just here to settle it." the man nods to one of the men with a gun, “do it.” 

everything happens so fast after that. someone yells and then a loud gunshot fills the empty parking lot. you swear your heart stops for a moment when you see sunghoon stagger back. his hands fly to this abdomen where red blood is already spreading across his white shirt. 

“sunghoon!” you scream, your hands fumbling with the car door as panic overtakes you. 

before you can reach the group of men, sunghoon lunges at one of the men, knocking him back. the guy’s gun slips from his grip, making it skid across the pavement. it lands a few feet away from you. before you can process what you’re doing, your body is diving for the gun, gripping its handle tightly in your shaky hands. 

“y/n, stay back!” sunghoon yells at you, his voice strained from the pain of his wound. but, you barely register what he’s saying as you aim the gun at the man who’s holding a gun to sunghoon’s head.

your finger so easily pulls the trigger of the gun. the recoil of the shot makes your arms jolt back. the man who you aimed at stumbles back, his own gun dropping to the pavement as he falls to his knees. 

suddenly, the weapon in your hand is burning hot in your hand, making you drop it. the other two men freeze, their eyes full of confusion and fear as they scan the scene in front of them. they definitely hadn’t been expecting that, and neither were you or sunghoon. 

“let’s go!” sunghoon shouts, his voice hoarse. his one hand is pressed against his bleeding stomach, his face pale as he tries to mask the pain he’s in. he starts to limp the the driver’s side of the car. 

“sunghoon, no,” you snap, rushing to his side of the car, “you can’t drive.” 

“i’m fine.” he argues, but you can see how much the wound is hurting him. his face doesn’t look the same at all. he can’t even stand up by himself, he’s holding onto the car’s roof like he’s gonna fall any second. 

“get in the passenger side, sunghoon.” you voice is a lot more stern that you had intended. 

you can tell that he wants to argue and protest, but the serious look in your eye makes him give in, “okay.” he carefully limps to the other side of the car. he’s just closing the passenger door when your shaking hands grab the steering wheel. 

the other three men have scrambled into their own car in front of you, taking off down the street quickly. the pavement below you is a mess of blood. you ignore the sight and panic bubbling up in your chest as you slam your foot on the gas. your heart is pounding so hard you can feel it in your throat, but you force yourself to focus. 

“just hold on, okay?” you say, your voice trembling. “we’re gonna get you help.”

“no!” sunghoon tries to sit up, “we can’t go to the doctor, y/n! they’ll call the cops! please no!” 

your eyes widen further at the realization that you can’t call for help, that you had just shot a man who’s blood is all over the pavement back there. that sunghoon is a thief, that there’s no way he could get help without going to jail. 

“fine, fine. no hospital!” you turn the wheel sharply, the tires screeching as you turn down another street, changing the direction you were going in. 

“you’re a terrible driver,” he mutters, his lips twitching into the faintest smirk despite the pain.

“shut up, sunghoon,”

before you can think, you’re pulling up to your apartment building. your hands are still trembling as you park the car in the shadows behind the building, where no one will notice it right away. your heart pounds as you glance around, praying none of your neighbors are outside or peeking through their windows.

“come on, sunghoon,” you mutter, rushing around to the passenger side. he groans as you help him out, his weight leaning heavily on you. there’s blood everywhere—on your hands, his clothes, the car seat. you wonder what the fuck you’re gonna do. 

it’s a struggle to get him up the stairs without dropping him or making too much noise. you kept switching between praying for sunghoon to not die right here and for your neighbours to not leave their apartment. you unlock your door with blood that doesn’t belong to you on your hands. you practically drag him inside after you to your bathroom. 

“sit down,” 

sunghoon practically falls down on the closed toilet lid, his face pale with droplets of sweat trailing down his face and neck. his white shirt is soaked with blood and you can feel your stomach turn at the sight— the smell of iron strong when you pull the shirt off of his head. 

you force yourself to not stare at the open, bloody wound and to move. you pull open the cabinet where you keep your first aid kit. 

“i can do it,” sunghoon mumbles, trying to sit up straighter. his voice is weak, but his stubbornness is as strong as ever. 

“no, you can’t,” you snap for the second time tonight. you kneel on the bathroom floor in front of him, pulling out all the supplies you might need. “just let me take care of you, okay?”

he blinks at you, surprised, but doesn’t argue. you grab a towel, folding it up before holding it out to him. “bite down on this,” you say softly. “this is gonna hurt.”

he hesitates for a moment before taking it, pressing it between his teeth. you grab a pair of tweezers from the kit, your hands shaking as you sterilize them with some rubbing alcohol.

“i’m sorry,” you whisper, more to yourself than to him, before pressing your hand firmly against his wound. he tenses, a muffled groan escaping him as you work. you don’t think the bullet is lodged too deep, but you’ve never done this before. every time you move, he jerks slightly, his knuckles white as he grips the edge of the sink beside him. 

“hold on,” you murmur, mostly to yourself. 

with one more try, you manage to pull the bullet out with the tweezers. a trickle of his blood starts to trail down his side. you drop the bullet into the sink and grab some gauze to press against his wound. 

“i’m so sorry,” you say again, tears filling your eyes as you try to clean the area. you’re just hoping you did everything correctly so that he doesn’t die in your apartment. you just work as quickly as you can, bandaging him up and cleaning it so it doesn’t get infected. “done.” 

sunghoon pulls the towel out of his mouth, his head falling back to the wall behind his head. “you’d be the worst nurse ever,” sunghoon jokes weakly, his voice so evidently tired. 

you roll your eyes, standing up and grabbing a clean shirt from your bedroom. “don’t make jokes right now,” you mutter, helping him put the clean shirt over his head, wondering when your hands will stop shaking. 

he winces at the movement, but he doesn’t complain. he doesn’t want to make you worry more about him. “thank you.” he tells you, and it catches you off guard. 

“yeah, yeah,” you mumble, trying to ignore the way your cheeks heat up. you help the thief to his feet, guiding him to the couch in your small living room. he sinks into the cushion, exhaustion taking over his body as it doesn’t take him long to fall asleep after you give him a pillow and blanket.

sunghoon stays at your apartment for the next few days, being forced to be taken care of by you. 

you make sure he eats and that  his wound is cleaned. everytime you see it you tell him it looks better, even though you’re never really sure. you suppose you say it looks better for your own reassurance and sunghoon’s caught onto that, but he doesn’t say anything. 

when you’re at work you find it hard to concentrate on anything but the fact that a wounded sunghoon is at home on your couch. on every break, your phone is quick to your ear, calling him, making sure he’s still alive. when he picks up everytime, he sounds the same— tired, but  playful. 

“i’m fine, y/n.” he says every time, you can always hear his smirk through the phone, “you’re going to make yourself crazy with all this worrying.” 

but you keep calling, and he keeps answering, and you can’t stop yourself from falling in love with his laugh every time. 

you have tonight off from work for the first time since sunghoon got hurt. you’re sitting on the couch beside him, his head rests in your lap with his messy dark hair sprawled out against your bare thighs. the light from the tv is the only light in the room. the movie is some action one that you randomly picked, too tired to scan through anymore of them trying to find a good one. so, neither of you are really watching the movie. your hand absentmindedly runs through his hair. 

you can feel his hand start to wander across the bare skin of your thighs. it’s subtle at first, just the tip of his finger tips grazing the surface. but they get closer to your core that your shorts are covering. your eyes narrow as you look down at him, “sunghoon, you’re hurt, stop.” 

he tilts his head up to look at you, his lips quirked, “but you’ve been taking such good care of me. let me take care of you now.”

you grab his hand to stop it from going underneath your shorts, “sunghoon, you’re hurt,” your voice is firm, “just rest.” 

he sighs, his head falling back into your lap. “i can’t rest forever, you know,” he mutters. “i have to go back to work at some point.”

the mention of his “work” makes your body stiffen underneath him. the night that he got hurt has been flashing through your mind constantly. the large amounts of blood, sunghoon’s groans of pain— the way the gun felt in your hand as you pulled the trigger. you can’t stop the way your eyebrows furrow in worry. 

of course he notices, “y/n, you know i have to go back. it’s my career. it’s how i get my money.” his voice is soft and gentle as he explains himself. 

“hoon, you can get a real job. i can help you find one.” 

he instantly shakes his head in disagreement. before you can protest more, which he knows you will do, he leans forward, pressing a kiss to your thigh, then another just above it. your breath hitches as he starts to press soft kisses against your stomach. 

“sunghoon,” you warn him, grabbing his face with your hand. he stops, his dark eyes meeting yours as he lets his face rest against your hand. “i please, i can’t stand seeing you in pain. it’s too soon.” 

a soft smile covers his lips, it doesn’t completely match his eyes that are swirling with lust. but he turns his head and presses a kiss into your palm. “you take such good care of, y/n. i’ll be okay.” 

his stubbornness makes you groan, “sunghoon, please.” you beg him again, thoughts of his wound stretching open cross your mind. 

but, he doesn’t stop. he only starts to press more kisses against your wrist and arm. his smile grows against your skin with every kiss. 

“let me take care of you now, y/n.” 

you sigh, the fight in you dissipating and the smile on his face has reached full peak. he knows he has won, that you can’t resist him any longer. 

“spread your legs for me, sweetheart.” his voice deepens, “let me see your pretty pussy.” 

you obey his command once again, leaning back against the arm of the couch and opening your legs for him. you let him push your shorts aside, letting the cool air brush against your wet folds. his eyes darken even more, his gaze completely focused on your core in front of him. 

“that’s it, my good girl.” his words come out rough and steady, “i wanna taste you so bad.” 

his free hand holds your one thigh, caressing it and keeping it open for his broad shoulders to fit between your legs. his touch is gentle at first. his fingers ever so lightly start to rub your pussy up and down, spreading your juices around, preparing you for his mouth. it had you whining out for him already. 

“fuck, you get so wet so easily for me. wanna make you cum with my tongue, baby.” 

he barely finishes his sentence before he’s leaning forward, his tongue darting out and tracing the outline of your lips. he’s teasing you, making you squirm and beg for him again. his breath and mouth are so warm against your sensitive skin. 

“oh god, sunghoon.” you moan, your hand reaching down between your legs to grab his hair, “that feels good.” 

sunghoon loves how sensitive you are. how easy you are to get moaning. “you taste so fucking good, ‘m getting get addicted to this pussy.” the vibrations of his words make your legs tighten around his shoulders. 

his tongue flicks your clit, sending a jolt of pleasure through your body. your hips jerked forward involuntarily, seeking more of his touch. sunghoon chuckles, loving the power he has over you. 

“tell me how it feels, y/n– how my tongue feels against your pussy.” 

you look down at him where his face is pressed deep into your core, his eyes telling you what he wants. his tongue is still darting out to lick every inch of your pussy. “it feels so good, i love your tongue so much. please, don’t stop.” 

“you don’t want me to stop?” his voice is teasing as he slow down the movement of his tongue on your clit. 

“no! no! please don’t!” 

sunghoon laughs at your begging, but he doesn’t stop his tongue from moving. he constantly alternates from flattening his tongue against your pussy to contracting it circling it quickly around your clit. 

“who does this pussy belong to, sweetheart?” 

your head is thrown back over the couch in pleasure, “you.” 

suddenly a harsh slap lands on your clit, sending you squealing as you sit up and look down at him, his hands still holding your thighs open. “louder, who does this pussy belong to?” 

“you!” you nod down at him, your thighs shaking from the pleasure and pain. 

“good girl– because you are my good girl, right?” 

“y-yes!” 

you see him smirk against your core again, “then cum for me, baby. cum all over my mouth.” then, he’s shoving his fingers inside your pussy, heading straight for your g spot as he starts sucking your clit into his mouth, his tongue circling it again and again– so desperate to get you to cum. 

“oh god! oh god, sunghoon!” you writhe on the couch. if it wasn’t from his hands holding your thighs open then you would’ve fallen off the couch. “i’m gonna cum!” 

his fingers are pounding into you mercilessly, “that's it, baby, let it all out. cum for me, y/n." his voice was a low growl, urging you on.

your orgasm hits you hard. all the worry and frustration you had built over sunghoon’s health all left your body as the pleasure came crashing over your body. your hips can’t stay still as they buck up against his face. you cry out, your voice filling up your entire apartment as the pleasure overtakes you. sunghoon holds you throughout the entire climax, his mouth and fingers never stopping— wanting it to last as long as possible for you. 

as your body starts to relax, you collapse back onto the couch, your breath coming in ragged gasps. sunghoon slowly pulls away from you. his lips are glistening with your juices, a satisfied smirk is on his face as he looks up at you. 

“fuck that was good,” you tell him, a smile spreading across your face in amusement. 

“i told you i could make you feel good,” sunghoon wiggles his eyebrows in response. you roll your eyes, sitting up on the couch and pushing him to sit up. he does so, slowly. his back against the couch and his feet on the floor now. “c’mere,” he pats to his thighs. 

“sunghoon, it’s too much. i don’t want you to get hurt.” 

he doesn’t attempt to argue this time, only grabs your wrist and throws you on top of his lap. both of your knees are either side of his hips.

“if you want to take care of me then make me feel good, y/n.” he says to you, his eyes still full of lust as they look up at you on top of him. 

you can’t ignore the throb of your pussy at his words, so you give in to him again. your hands grab the hem of your shirt and slip it off your body. you move so you can take off your soaked panties and shorts, leaving you completely bare on top of the car thief. his bottom lip is tucked tightly between his teeth as he takes in the sight of you. it’s the first time he’s seen you completely bare. and it’s just for him. 

“you’re so beautiful,” he says as he reaches out his hand. you think he’s going to cup your breast or touch your body, but his hand settles on your lower jaw. his eyes looking directly into yours. “let me kiss you.” 

you lean down, making your lips meet with his. the kiss is gentle and soft. it makes your heart skip a beat as he prolongs it. he doesn’t want to let you go. but he does when you pull away for air. 

“i want you inside me, hoon.” 

sunghoon smirks at your confession, his hands pulling off the hem of his shorts so his cock can spring free for you. it looks so hard and thick— the memory of it stretching you open in the stolen car fills your mind. you can’t wait to feel it again. 

sunghoon grips your hips, giving you something to steady yourself on as you position yourself over his cock. you slide down onto his length with ease from your juices and his saliva covering your pussy. you take him in deeper and deeper until, stopping when he’s all the way inside of you. 

a moan escapes your mouth, your head falling forward to rest on his shoulder as you adjust to large size. sunghoon’s hands rub up and down your bare back, soothing you from the stretch. 

“we’ll just go slow this time, okay?” sunghoon’s husky tone speaks in your ear— reminding you of his wound. 

you nod as you sit up straight again. you keep your hands on his broad shoulders as you start to lift your hips off his cock slowly, then push them back down. the first thrust already has you reeling. you continue with the slow pace of your hips, bouncing up and down on top of his thighs. you start to alternate with small, slow circles of your hips. you move them left to right and right to left. it makes sunghoon groan out into the living room. 

“fuck that feels so good, you’re gonna be the death of me.” 

“shh, don’t say that when you have a gunshot wound.” you reply, covering his mouth with your hand. you can feel him smirk against your hand, but he doesn’t remove it. 

you keep your hand on his mouth, making him keep quiet, preventing some of his oxygen. you focus on sliding up and down on his cock, making it hit your g spot everytime it enters your pussy. your eyes keep fluttering shut at the feeling of it. 

sunghoon’s eyes are burning into you, watching every single movement you make on top of him. he loves watching you bring yourself to the edge with his cock— using him. 

“fuck i love your cock.” you moan out, starting to feel the coil unwinding in your abdomen as the pleasure builds and builds. 

sunghoon then takes your hand off his mouth with his hands, you want to complain, to mock him for being disobedient like he did to you, but he speaks too quickly, “i love you.” 

his confession doesn’t startle you as much as it does make the pleasure inside of you turn to fire. it only fuels your need to make him feel good— to cum all over his cock. 

“i love you,” you tell him, leaning over to kiss him harshly. he keeps up with your messy pace, kissing you back the same way. your hips don’t stop bouncing on top of him as you make out. 

sunghoon’s hands wrap around your body, pulling you closer to him so your chests are touching. your own arms wrap around his neck. your chest is in his face as you focus on fucking him harder and harder. you can feel his lips start to migrate from your jaw to your neck to your nipples. he sucks each one in his mouth, biting them and swirling them with his tongue. 

“fuck, that’s it, sweetheart.” he words come out in a groan. “keep bouncing like that— you’re gonna make me cum.” 

a sob escapes your lips as the pleasure inside of you is about to spill at any second now. “i love you.” you repeat as you keep your head close to his. 

“i love you.” 

your nails start to dig into his back when you feel his one hand snake down between your bodies, starting to rub at your sensitive clit. you cry out, not wanting him to stop. sunghoon can feel the way your walls are rapidly clenching around his cock. he can tell how close you are to cumming. 

“are you going to cum for me, y/n?” he asks you, his voice hoarse and strained as he feels his own orgasm approaching. 

“yes, yes!” 

“cum then, baby. cum around my cock for me.” 

his words send you over the edge. your whole body tenses up as the pleasure overtakes you. it makes your toes curl and fingers dig deeper into his shoulders. you keep your face buried into his neck, letting him hear all your moans of his name. 

the second your wet walls started to spasm feverishly around his cock, sunghoon can’t hold back his own orgasm anymore. he lets out a loud grunt of your name as his cum shot out of his cock, filling your pussy up with it instead. you can only bounce a few more times on his cock before your knees completely give out with the rest of your tired body. 

you keep each other pulled close. your arms wrapped around one another as you both steady your breaths. there’s sweat all over you and your pussy is constantly throbbing around him. your mind is hazy as you try to comprehend what had just happened. 

sunghoon is the first to pull away, sitting back against the couch as he looks up at you. he laughs quietly at your tired face, your eyelids practically closed. even though he’s injured, he still gently lifts you off his cock and sets you beside him on the couch. your hair is a mess as it sprawls against the couch arm behind your head. 

sunghoon reaches to the coffee table to get tissues to clean up the mess between your legs. he presses soft kisses into your thighs as he cleans you. he makes sure to get every remnant of his cum off your pussy. he ignores the fact that the sight makes his cock twitch in his shorts again. 

sunghoon slips off his shirt and puts it on your body, covering you up. you hum at the smell of his cologne surrounding you. you can hardly believe how mentally and physically exhausted you are. the stress from the past week of taking care of him and the three men trying to hurt him really took a toll on you. 

sunghoon shifts you so he can lay behind you on the couch. he rests his head on yours as he kisses the side of your cheek. he stays there, close to you when he says, “i love you.” 

now, as you can think more clearly, you sigh, “i love you, too sunghoon but,” you turn over your to face him, eye to eye, “i can’t keep loving you if you keep risking your life for these cars. i can't constantly think if you’re dead or alive. it’s too stressful for me.” 

sunghoon looks at you, taking in all your features that he’s come to memorize. the features that he’s fallen in love with since the first time he’s seen you on the empty street behind the club. he’s seen you this past week almost pulling your hair out from worrying so much about him. you couldn’t even go to the bathroom without worrying that if you’d come back he’d be dead.

he saw the way you risked your own life for him during the gith with the three men. the way you dove for the gun just to protect him. he’s done what he never wanted to. he’s put you in danger. 

“if it’s between stealing cars and you,” he starts, his voice soft like a whisper, “then it’s you. it’s always you.”

you can’t help the smile that spreads across your face, “really?” 

“yeah, i’m done with the car stealing shit, then.” 

you grab his face and bring it to yours, meshing your lips together. both of you smile into the kiss— happy to start fresh with one another. 

“i love you.” you tell him again, pulling back to press kisses all over his face out of pure happiness. 

sunghoon laughs as you kiss him, “i love you, too.” he wraps his arms around your body, pulling you against his large frame, “but you should sleep now, i find out what your mouth feels like around my cock later.” he fake winces in pain when you shove him his shoulder— making you laugh before you settle against his body again. 

both of your eyes close as you drift off to sleep together on the couch. 

now that sunghoon has hit the brakes and left the fast lane for you, there’s no more danger or crime— just the two of you. and that’s all you could ever ask for.

@ taeghi, 2024. do not repost or reuse in anyway.

PLEASE REBLOG IF YOU ENJOY, AS LIKES MAKE IT HARD FOR WORK TO BE SPREAD AND ENJOYED BY OTHERS :)

stay safe everyone :)

taglist : @awqken @021894s @hvseung @hees-love @caratstick

@hollyoongs

@starry-eyed-bimbo @immelissaaa @sweetjaemss

@rayofsunshineeee @cloud-lyy @darlingjungwon

@kimjkejyy @niniissus @love4hee

@17ericas @mrsjohnnysuh @cornenhapovs

@dearsjaeyun @hyunjinnnnnnnnnnnnnn @rbf-aceu

@jakeswifez @capri-cuntz @sngleehee

@aanniikkaa @wiccangirl29 @mbioooo0000

@selleprotection @ancynymcnzjy @zorange13

@slvrnm @insommni4 @m1m1-70

@heeseungspookie @heechwe @seuliecore

@deobitifull @vernonburger @iluvikeu

@skaterhoon @shiningnono @mrsjang6

@onlyhees @mirramirra @cherry-park

@missychief1404 @jiawji @yongbokified

@aileeeeeeeeeeeee @minniejenseo @shjsnjkj

@ikeuwoniee @jayienn @tanisha2060

@kimjkekyy @jakeswsh @jiminie-08

@jenojammin @emogrlsworld

@jaeyunlvrs @minaateez @wave2hoon

@jeonholics

[gyupinkys]

BOSS YOU AROUND

Mingyu x afab reader

WC: 3.7K

WARNINGS: GUN PLAY, VIOLENCE, THREATS, DUBCON?, KIDNAPPING, throat fucking , unprotected sex, heavy degradation, spanking, swtich mingyu, switch reader, creampie, mingyu says some wild shit towards the end 🤷‍♀️

Mingyu is officially sick and tired of being the muscle man. It's not even his specialty, he's supposed to work with Jihoon and Wonwoo in tech, but alas he’s always called to do the dirty work.  He’s just too fucking nice and he can’t stand to hurt people. He just tells himself it’s what he gets for being 6’2 and built like a brick wall. As he slams the security guard to your building’s head into the wall he’s rethinking his life choices. The guard finally faints and he goes upstairs with Jun to your front door. He rings your doorbell so as to not disturb you too much at this hour. 

“Who is it?” your voice rings out.

“UPS” Mingyu says with a giggle, making Jun laugh along with him.

On the other side of the door you grow suspicious. You’re definitely not getting a package past midnight…

You creep to the door and look out the peephole to be greeted with two men you’ve never seen before.

“Y/N, I know you’re there” the dark haired one taunts making your breath catch.

You back away from the door trying to remain quiet when you hear one of them say ���I’m tired of waiting” quickly followed by heavy kicks to your door.

What the fuck is happening? You’re not going to sit here and let two strangers break into your fucking apartment. You turn around and run to your window, trying to leave through the fire escape. As you get your window open your front door flies open and the two men walk inside nonchalantly. Your eyes widen as you duck through the window, running down the flights. You hear heavy boots stomping behind you, but you don’t turn around. You’re on your final flight when your feet leave the ground, being lifted off the floor by the back of your shirt. You kick and scream, trying to get him off you but he wraps a large hand around your throat. 

“Don’t be like that, bunny.” 

You turn to face the man and your eyes widen. Woah. If this is the man kidnapping you you’re going down without a fight. 

“And who are you?” you ask with a seductive twang.

“Are you flirting with me right now?”

“Well, you did sweep me off my feet” you shrug.

He gives you a blank stare before nodding to someone behind you. You feel a sharp prick in your neck making you gasp.

“You asshole you didn’t need to sedate me!” you speak as you begin to feel weak.

“Better safe than sorry.” he smirks.

You muster up the last of your strength to kick him right in the balls watching him crumble as he drops you to the floor and you succumb to the darkness.

~~~~~~~~

“Will you stop looking at me?” Mingyu grits out, throwing his head against the wall.

“In order for you to know I’m looking at you, you have to be looking at me.”

“Shut the fuck up.”

“Come make me, Daddy.” you smile widely at the man standing across from you.

“I will come there and shoot you in the head if you keep this up.”

“If you were gonna kill me you would've done it already.”

“That's not true, we need something from you.”

“And I need something from you, Mingyu.”

“What?”

“I’d guess it's about eight inches, thick, probably a little veiny.”

He walks up to you and leans over your body tied to a metal chair. “You want my cock, baby?”

“I mean I wouldn't say no.” you smirk.

“You don’t even know me. Are you that much of a slut?”

“For a guy like you? Absolutely.”

He quietly chuckles and backs up, turning and walking straight out the room and leaving you alone again. He’s been doing this the entire time you’ve been here. You couldn't actually tell how long they’ve had you here and to be honest you’re not quite sure why. You’re shocked you’re not freaking out, normally you’d be crying and throwing up but maybe the fact they have not harmed you is making you a little calmer. That and Mingyu who constantly visits you but does nothing but complain to you. You’re starting to think he brought you here so he wouldn't have to pay for a therapist. 

He comes back into the room with a man you’ve never seen before.

“If all your friends are hot, I'll just stay here forever.” you say, mesmerized by the man with the glasses standing next to Mingyu.

“You weren’t joking.” glasses says under his breath, walking back out the door. 

Mingyu walks up to you and unties your binds. “Are you not scared that I'll murder you?” you ask, slightly offended. 

One second you're looking up at him and the next you're trapped against the wall with his hand tightly wrapped around your neck.

“Are you forgetting I fucking kidnapped you?” he spits. “This isn't shits and giggles. You’re not leaving this place alive, so if I were you I’d stop taunting your captor.”

That sends you straight back to earth, You feel like everything hits you at once, your fears and worries from before welling up. Tears gather in your eyes as he begins to drag you through the basement, bringing you up a set of stairs into a large warehouse. He shoves you into a chair but you’re struggling to catch your breath, feeling a panic attack on the way. He’s right, you don’t know him, he kidnapped you, he fucking drugged you. You grip the fabric of your pants, trying to ground yourself as you whimper out of frustration.

You faintly hear someone enter the room but you remain focused on trying not to completely break down right now. 

“Shut that bitch up before I give her something to cry about” someone speaks, making you cry even harder.

Someone softly grabs your chin and tilts your head up. Through teary eyes you see Mingyu squatted in front of you.

“Listen, now is not the time for this. These guys are not as nice as me, they’ll actually hurt you. I need you to put on a brave face for me, ok? Don’t let them think you’re weak.” He wipes your tears from your eyes and smooths your hair. “Just take a deep breath. Pretend like you’re talking to me.” he smiles, making you calm down enough to catch your breath. 

“Mingyu! Enough babying get the fuck out my way.”

You watch him sigh but get up, walking to the back of the room and leaning against the wall.

A tall man approaches you with a condescending smile. “Hello, Y/N.”

“Who are you?” 

“I’ll be asking the questions here.” he says with a harsh tug to your hair. 

“You haven’t asked a question.” 

His eyes widen but he wipes the smirk off your face with a punch straight to your jaw. Holy fucking shit. If he wanted you to stop crying that's definitely not happening now. You let out a sound between a groan and a whimper, dropping your head. He grabs your hair harshly and yanks your head back. 

“Where the fuck is San?”

Your eyes widen. San? 

“I haven’t seen him in like 6 months.”

“If you lie to me again I’ll just kill you.”

“I’m not lying! He left for London 6 months ago, I haven’t seen him since.”

“London? What business does he have in London?”

“I don’t know” you cry, scared he wouldn't like your answer. 

He beckons over one of his henchmen and speaks to them before standing up. 

“Pleasure doing business with you.” he smiles and you breathe a sigh of relief. 

“Jun, kill this bitch.” he says and begins to walk away. Your eyes widen and you stand up to run only to be shoved back down by who you’re assuming to be Jun. You begin to cry more, feeling helpless. You don’t understand what’s going on and all you can do is sit here and fucking cry. 

“Wait.” Mingyu says a bit too loudly to sound natural. He clears his throat, “At least let me have my way with her first, it’ll be a shame to let that pussy go to waste.” 

Your heart stops. As if this can’t get any worse. 

The man looks at him oddly. “Didn’t know you’d be into that but go ahead.” he says and walks out, his entourage following until it's just you and Mingyu. He starts to walk towards you but you scurry towards the door. You attempt to open it, but there's a code on the lock. You don't even hear him approach you until he has you caged in his arms. “Y/N turn around.” 

“Mingyu please don’t.”

“Do you think I’m actually gonna assault you? I know we don’t know eachother but I’d think you would think of me better than that.”

“You said it yourself, I don’t know you.” you whisper. 

“There's cameras in here you need to act scared.” 

“Well I am scared.”

“Jesus christ Y/N, I’m not going to hurt you. I’m tryna get you out of here alive.” he whispers. 

He unlocks the door and begins to drag you out of the room, but you pretend to fight back.

He grabs your throat, but doesn’t squeeze. “Stop fucking fighting me.” he growls, flashing you a sheepish smile after. 

What is up with this guy? Is this fucking funny to him?

He drags you up a flight of stairs and outside. 

“Ok, I'm going to pretend to trip and you run to the black range rover by the tree. There's keys in the passenger cup holder.”

“That's a bad place to keep your keys.” 

He gives you a tight smile. “Would you rather I let Jun kill you?”

He has a point. 

“Ok, bye.”

“No thank you kiss?” he pouts. 

“I’ll kick you in the balls again.” 

He puts his hands up in surrender. 

You run to the car and drive away, watching him disappear through the rear view mirror. 

~~~~~

2 months later 

You hear two loud knocks at your door. “UPS”

Your heart stops. You tiptoe to your kitchen cabinet pulling out the gun you bought for moments like this. Two more knocks sound and you hesitantly walk to the door, peaking through your peephole. 

Oh. It is actually a UPS worker. You open your door and sign for your package. You look down your hallway when you see movement and see someone peeking around the corner but quickly pulling back when you look in that direction. 

“Mingyu I know that's you.” you say with a sigh. 

You hear a thud followed by a “Damn it.” 

He walks around the corner with a pout. 

“Why are you here?” 

“What? You didn't want to see me?” he says, sounding offended.

“Mingyu you fucking kidnapped me.” you deadpan.

“Ok but I also saved you so you gotta give me some credit.”

“Ok fine.”

He stands in front of your door and stares at you without speaking. 

“Why are you here?” you sigh. 

“Oh, I came to kidnap you again. They didn't like that I let you go.”

Your eyes widen and you slam the door shut. “C’mon Y/N I’m fucking joking.” you hear through the other side of the door. You take a deep breath, trying to remain calm. You open the door and he invites himself in, taking a seat on your couch. 

“Lovely set up you have here.” 

“Get to the point.” you say a little too hostile for his liking. 

“I don’t know. You were on my mind so I came to see how you were doing.”

You slit your eyes at him. There's no way he thinks this normal. 

“I don’t believe you” 

He looks at you with a pout. “It's true I just wanted to see how you were doing.” he whispers. 

You laugh. This guy isn't real. You walk up to him and ruffle his hair. “Mingyu you’re really not what you seem.”

“What's that supposed to mean?”

“This big beefy man is just a pouty little princess.”

“That's not true.” he whines.

“Mingyu you’re literally pouting right now.”

He immediately fixes his face and stands up, making you stumble backwards. He catches you by your waist and sets you upright before starting to rant at a pace you couldn't keep up with. 

“Ok,you got me. I’m here because i’m so god damn horny and all I could think about was you saying all this nasty shit about what you wanted to do to me but I didnt wanna come and make you think I was just using you for some quick fuck because I’m not but I guess I am and I know you’re probably traumatized so the last thing on your mind is sex but fucking hell I can’t even cum without thinking of you so I had to come but I don’t know what-”

“Holy shit, Shut up.”

He looks at you with wide eyes but shuts up, sitting back down. 

“Mingyu, tell me what you want from me.”

He groans and mumbles out “I want you to fuck me.”

You laugh. “You’re fucking pathetic. You could get any girl you want yet you're beating your dick to me? The girl you fucking kidnapped? The girl who wants nothing to do with you?” 

He remains silent looking at you with wide eyes. “Mingyu, do you like when people are mean to you? Is that it? You want me to take all my anger out on you? Fuck you until you can’t make a single thought in that pretty little head of yours?”

His breathing picks up, making you smile. “You like this? You like when women degrade you? Who would've thought.”

“Please.”

“Begging already? What do you want me to do to you?”

“Whatever you want I’ll take it all I swear.” he throws his head back on the couch. “You can do whatever you want to me and I’ll be good for you.”

“You promise?” 

“Yes, I promise! I just want to feel you.”

You can’t believe this six foot something bean pole is sitting here begging for you. Your ego is through the roof.

You run a hand down his chest, his breathing picking up. He looks at you with hooded eyes. 

“I like my men quiet and submissive. Can you do that for me? Keep these perfect lips shut?” you say, tracing the outline of his lips. He nods furiously, making you giggle. 

“Oh, Mingyu. What am I going to do with you?”

You straddle him and pull him into a deep kiss, his moans turning you on more. You harshly grind your hips down on him, feeling his hard length. 

“You really like this don’t you?” you whisper in his ear, dragging your hands down the hardness of his body. He’s sculpted like a god, every ridge and curve as toned as the last. He nods, hands flying to your waist to grind you harder onto his length.

“You should've heard what was running through my mind the first time I saw you. I was thinking I’d let you do anything you wanted to me, I would have taken it however you wanted me to, no complaints. You could’ve bent me over my couch and fucked me right then and there and I would’ve got on my knees and thanked you” 

He groans, burying his face into your neck. “Will you fuck me the way I want? Nice and deep? I want it so bad, Gyu.” you whisper.

Before you know it your back hits the couch and he’s hovering above you, trapping your hands above your head. 

“I think you’re forgetting who's in charge here. I came to fuck this tight little pussy not to be bossed around.”

“Yet you let me boss you around so easily.” you smirk.

“It’ll be hard to make orders when you're gagging on my cock.”

“As if.”

He grabs you by your neck and drags you to the nearest wall pressing you against it. 

“If you want me to fuck you like a slut then I’ll fuck you like a slut.”

He shoves you to your knees and traps your body between his and the wall, shoving his pants down enough to pull out his cock and spitting on his length. 

“Open up.”

You look up at him with a defiant look, refusing to listen. “If we have to be like that, so be it.”

He pulls a black gun out of his pocket, pressing it to your temple and cocking it.

“Open your fucking mouth, slut.”

Your eyes widen and you open your mouth.

“That's what I like to see.” he smirks. He rubs his tip on your lips, smearing his precum as if it was lipgloss. You hate to admit it but you’re beyond turned on, his dominance making you clench your legs together tightly. 

“Pretty.” he whispers before slowly sliding his length into your mouth. “Just be a good toy and take it.”

He begins thrusting into your mouth, pressing your head to the wall by your hair so you can do nothing but take it. 

“Fucking hell, your throat is so tight. I should use it all night hmm? Cum as many times as I want and force you to swallow it. I think I’ll just leave you high and dry.”

You groan in annoyance, making him speed up his thrust. “Unh, unh we can’t have that. I want you so cockdrunk you can’t even breathe, let alone think.”

He drives his dick down your throat, moaning at the sound of your gagging and the tears flowing down your cheeks. You can barely take him, his dick just as big as you thought it would be. “Just like that, Baby.” he groans, pushing as deep as he can and holding it until you begin to get light headed. He pulls out and gives you a second to catch your breath. 

“Bend over the couch.”

You stumble up to your feet and walk back to the couch and bend over the arm, bracing yourself for whatever he was coming. He walks behind you and harshly spanks your ass. 

“How wet is this pussy?” he asks and rubs you over your shorts. 

You whine in response, your pride damaged. He slowly drags your pants and panties down, groaning at the sight. 

“Fucking hell. I don’t think I’ve ever seen someone get this wet. You really enjoy being treated like a fucking whore, don’t you?”

“Fuck you.”

He lets a glob of spit drip from his mouth to your cunt, rubbing it through your folds. 

“You're wet enough for me to slide right in, I’m sure sluts like you aren’t used to getting  any prep right? Always ready to take whatever cock you can get.” 

He slides two fingers into you, thrusting in and out, trying to work you open despite his words. 

“Pussys so tight, baby. I know the perfect way to stretch this shit out.”

You feel something cold and hard press against your clit and run through your folds. No fucking way. 

“This’ll do a nice job,” he whispers. He presses your chest into the couch and slides the tip of the gun into you, watching you stretch open around it. He thrusts it in and out, watching your wetness gather on the base. It’s somehow making you feel good, the fear making you leak down your thighs. 

“Can’t wait to fuck you open on my cock. 

He pulls the gun out and taps his cock on your hole, teasing you. 

“Beg”

“No.”

He digs his gun into your side. “You’re in no position to say no. Do you not want to cum?”

You groan. “Please fuck me, Mingyu.”

“Hmm, I don’t think so.”

The fuck?

“What.”

“Tell me why I should fuck you. You need it don’t you?”

“Yes, I need it-” Before you can finish your sentence he forces the gun down your throat making you freeze. 

“On second thought,  I don't want to hear you.” 

He pushes just his tip, relishing in your warmth. “If you don’t start listening i’ll finish the job, cum in you and then fucking kill you. Is that what you want? The cops to find you with my cum leaking out of you?”

Jesus fucking christ, if he keeps talking you’ll actually cum untouched. You moan around the gun, pushing your hips into him. 

“That's what I like to see.” he groans and slides in completely, quickly picking up a steady pace and pounding you into the couch. 

You whine and groan around the gun, unable to move due to his grip on you. His cock feels heavenly, hitting all the right spots and fitting in you perfectly. This is exactly what you wanted him to do to you the moment you saw him.

He suddenly pulls the gun out and throws it to the floor carelessly. When a loud bang sounds when the gun collides with the wall you both freeze. A bullet hole in your wall is staring at you along with the realization someone is bound to call the police. 

“We got three minutes, tops. Think you can cum by then?” he laughs, resuming his thrusts.

“Fuck yea, don’t stop.”

He lifts your hips and hits deeper, making your toes curl. You swear he’s in your stomach with how deep he’s going, and his whines and moans do nothing but spur you on. 

 “Rub that sweet pussy for me I wanna feel you cum around me.”

You sneak a hand to your clit and rub harsh circles, chasing your high as you hear sirens approaching. With one particularly hard thrust you're gone, creaming around his cock. He takes this as a sign to let go, cumming deep into your spent pussy. 

“Keep it all in there for me, Ok? They're gonna need some evidence when they question you.”

He pulls you in for a kiss as he pulls up his pants. “We should do this again.” he says with a cheeky smirk as loud bangs sound from your door. 

“I’ll think about it.” you smile as he climbs through your fire escape. 

“I’ll see you soon.” he smirks and clubs down, slipping into a black range rover and driving off. 

You rush to open your door, being met by officers with their guns drawn. You decide to give Mingyu a hard time, easily fitting into the role of the distressed woman. 

“He just left through the fire escape.” you say with a dramatic whimper, laughing on the inside about the night Mingyu’s about to have.

[velvet-games]

ficlet inspired by this post @theautotrophic made. it ended spiraling into something very different lol but it's still kind of the same idea? I just needed to explain why vox joins the hotel in my universe.

“Ugh! How is this still happening?” Charlie moaned, turning off the TV. “I don’t think we can make any progress if we don’t start creating our own news coverage.”

“What was that?” Alastor stepped closer to the couch she and Vaggie were slumped on, suddenly curious. 

“It’s Vox. He’s making almost every channel about how much of a failure the hotel is – even though we just proved redemption is possible – and I think it’s actually gaining a lot of traction.” Charlie sighed. “It’s just … I thought everything would get better after we saved the day and my dad could help out, you know? But we’re still fighting just to get people to give us a chance.”

Vaggie put a hand on Charlie’s shoulder. “Hey, it’s okay. We’re the ones with actual proof. I’m sure if we make our own announcement–”

“Wait! Alastor, you made that commercial last time, right?”

“Oh, uh, about that, Charlie–”

“You can make more to counter Vox’s stuff. Hey, and you were friends with him at some point too, right? So you know how to deal with him–”

“Charlie.” Vaggie spun Charlie around to face her. “Sorry. It’s just …”

“Vaggie made a deal with me so that I would never have to work with those picture boxes again,” Alastor finished cheerfully. 

Vaggie visibly deflated in shame. “Uh, yeah, something like that,” she mumbled. “I’m sorry.” Her expression became even more miserable as Charlie seemed to deflate too.

“Oh,” Charlie said. “Well, maybe you could–”

“But!” Alastor interjected, holding up a finger. He was far above drawing any attention to the Vees unprovoked, but this was about as good of an excuse as any. “The purpose of the deal was to prevent me from having any obligation to use the medium for producing entertainment. I would be happy to … take care of the interference from Vox.”

“Great!” Charlie’s eyes shone for one perfectly naive second before her face twisted in suspicion. “Wait … what are you gonna do?”

“Oh, just mess with his wires a little; nothing extreme, dear.”

—

A loud BOOM shook the building as Vaggie failed for the third time to get the TV to turn on. She sighed. “Goddammit.” None of the TVs were working, the Vees’ website had crashed, and Alastor had been gone for the last 24 hours. Vaggie could almost see the expression of horror on Charlie’s face when she found out Alastor had absolutely done more than “mess with his wires a little.” Vaggie rushed to the window, and yep. There it was: a giant red deer demon with shadow tentacles shooting out of it as a much smaller blue smudge darted around with trails of electricity following it. She sighed again. “Charlie? Come down; Alastor’s being an asshole again.”

—

“And I had a great idea for a new show that was gonna air today too!” Vox narrowly dodged another hit from Alastor’s shadows. 

“Another new show? My dear, you really are proving just how much you’re throwing rocks at the wall in the hopes that they’ll miraculously stick.” Alastor turned as Vox appeared behind him in a shower of sparks. “And was it really your idea? Or did you just have your little unpaid underlings come up with it for you?” 

“Fuck you!”

“Oh, I think we’re far past that possibility, darling.” Alastor chuckled, finally managing to grab Vox before he could jump into another streetlamp. “What was the idea? Another reality dating show with manufactured drama? Really, is anything you produce even remotely original nowadays?” The shadow tendril threw Vox into a nearby building. What remained of the terrified pedestrians scattered like ants as Vox fell, several bricks going with him. “What a pity. You used to at least come up with half-decent stories, even if the endings were always laughable.”

Vox groaned, trying to hold several shards of his broken screen in place. “N-No one cares. No one fucking cares what you think; I’m the one who built the empire. You have like, three listeners on that ancient radio show.”

“And each one of them has told me how much they like it, that it’s their favorite, even!” Alastor leaned down. “Would anyone watch you without the hypnosis, without other people’s hard work masquerading as your own?” He smirked. “Would anyone love you without manipulation?”

That last part caused Vox to look up, teeth bared. Several wires shot out of the building behind him and attached themselves to his head, lifting him up to be at eye level with Alastor. “Would anyone love you without manipulation?” Alastor kept smiling despite the surge of electricity that hit him; he quickly batted Vox out of the air, cutting off the attack. 

“I’ll have you know that nearly everyone who meets me adores me, whether they admit it or not,” Alastor replied smoothly. “Including you.”

Vox was on his knees, wires falling as he coughed up what became a puddle of blood. It was always startling how red it was, despite the mechanical nature of most of his body. “Yeah, have a fucking laugh.” His voice became quiet, muffled by static. “Have a fucking laugh about the fact that I loved you and you threw me away like a box of scraps.” He sniffed, standing up shakily and wiping a trail of red from his mouth. “Well, I’m the one with all the influence now, aren’t I? I’m the one with an actual team. You were fading even before you left; I bet you really did ask an angel for help, just to stay fucking relevant. Most of the other overlords aren’t scared of you anymore, and they’ll fucking kill you when none of them are.” 

Alastor narrowed his eyes. “You loved me? Is that why you ran away with that moth to make ‘entertainment’ even you won’t watch?” He started shrinking to his usual size, stepping forward. 

Vox scrambled back, one hand generating a few weak sparks. “Val loves me.”

“Valentino knows you’ll gnaw on any affection you get like a starving dog with a soup bone.” Alastor pushed Vox to the ground again, reaching down to wrap his fingers around Vox’s throat. The sparks in his hand died. “He knows you’re too selfish to make a real connection with anyone.”

Tears welled in Vox’s eyes, round and filling up nearly all of what was left of his screen. “I-I still love you,” he managed to choke out quietly. 

Alastor tightened his grip. “You love money. And I was stupid enough to care for you before I realized that.” Vox’s eyes managed to get even bigger as he started to really choke. “But you’re just dirt underneath my feet, and I’ll kill you every day that I have left here so you remember that.” Alastor just watched Vox’s face for a moment, then pulled out a small knife with his other hand. “Actually, you know what? I have angelic steel with me. I think I’ll just finish you here.” He drove the blade into Vox's side before he could respond, prompting a pained, strangled sound. It wouldn’t kill him quickly. He’d feel it for hours as he bled out if no one helped him. 

“Alastor!” a shrill voice called. He turned to see Charlie’s panicked face, her chest jumping with labored breaths as she stumbled to a stop. “Stop! Stop; I’m sure he’s had enough.”

Alastor stood up, giving one last petty kick to Vox’s leg. He put on an upbeat tune. “Hm, alright. I was just about getting bored with him anyway. How about we go get lunch at that new place around the corner? I’m absolutely starved!”

“I–” Charlie blinked. “No, Alastor, he–” She looked around his shoulder, flinching when she saw the state Vox was in. “Shouldn’t we help him?” she whispered. 

“And whyever would we do that?” 

“Well, I mean …” Charlie started, then appeared to brighten a little. “Actually. I have an idea.” She straightened her shoulders, putting on her “aggressively-kindly” face and voice. “As princess of Hell, I command you to leave the Vees and come help with the hotel. And make up with Alastor.” She glanced at Alastor apologetically before mumbling quickly, “onlyifyouwanttothoughyoudon’thavetodoanythingyou’renotcomfortablewith.” 

Vox blinked, managing to look unimpressed despite bleeding profusely and only having a quarter of his original face visible between all the cracks and glitching. “I would literally rather kill myself.”

Charlie blushed all the way to her ears. “O-Oh.” 

Alastor just burst out laughing, making a show of spinning his cane as he stepped closer to Vox. “Well, old friend,” he said, lifting a heeled boot above Vox’s chest and pressing down. “I’m sure that won’t be necessary if you refuse our help.” Vox sputtered a little as Alastor continued to push. “How about this: Lucifer can heal your wound, and you take a temporary break from working with the Vees, just long enough to help us create a presentation for the angels.” He let his gums show with a smirk that probably contained enough smugness to kill a horse. “And I would love to have you for dinner the night you leave. Is that a deal?”

Vox immediately blushed despite clearly being too lightheaded from blood loss to fully understand what Alastor was saying. “You bastard” – Alastor pressed harder – “Fine! Fine, yes. It’s a deal justliftyourfootholyshitfuck–”

“Wonderful!” Alastor lifted his boot, leaving Vox coughing and bending over on his side. “Now. you two have fun; I’m afraid I need another visit to the tailor,” he said. He brushed off his lapels and straightened his cuffs. “Oh, and Vox? It wasn’t angelic steel; I just think desperation suits you.”

Alastor was gone before the cries of indignant surprise assaulted his ears.

[rrainydaydreams]

I love incorrect quote generators

Twilight: Watcha doin? 

Wild: Stealing my neighbour’s cat. 

Twilight: Scandalous. 

Twilight: Can I help?

-

Hyrule: Why is there blood everywhere? 

Four: I may have aggressively poked someone with a knife. 

Hyrule: You stabbed someone?! 

Four: No, no. I aggressively poked someone with a knife.

-

Four: ...I'm pretty sure that place is fire-proof, or something. 

Wild, grenade in hand: Alright, but is it explosion-proof?

-

Hyrule: Wow. I keep stepping on a lot of crunchy twigs. 

Twilight: Those are bones, Hyrule. 

Hyrule: *looks straight up* Not if I never look down.

-

Warriors: What do you all intend on majoring in? 

Time: Respecting women. 

Four: Minecraft. 

Twilight: Criminal justice and psychology. 

Hyrule: I'm terrified that I’ll lock myself into an interest that I’ll no longer be passionate about in a few years like all the other areas of study I’ve pursued over my life! 

Wild: Minecraft as well.

-

Warriors: Like, no offense to myself and all, but what the fuck am I actually doing?

-

Time: I scare people a lot because I walk very softly and they don't hear me enter rooms. So when they turn around, I'm just kind of there and their fear fuels me.

-

Wind: Hey, Legend, where are you going? 

Legend: Well, it depends. When I die, probably hell. 

Legend: But right now I’m going to McDonald’s.

-

Hyrule: Man, it smells like wrongdog out here. 

Warriors: 

Warriors: Hyrule, are you alright? 

Hyrule: *sobs*

-

Wild, to Warriors: Please, picking locks is my specialty. 

Wild: *throws a brick through the window* 

Wild: Okay, let’s go.

-

Warriors, to the Chain: If you’re happy and you know it, clap your hands! 

*silence* 

Warriors: Damn, y’all depressed as fuck! 

Legend: You didn’t clap either- 

Warriors: SHUT UP!

-

Wild: That’s a crazy idea. Insane. It doesn’t make sense. 

Hyrule: You’ll do it? 

Wild: Of course.

-

Bailiff: Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth? 

Wind: No.

-

Wind: You know, it’s fine to admit you were wrong. 

Legend: *Sipping their drink after accidentally adding salt* I just like the way it tastes.

-

Legend: Tired of just deserving better. Gonna start taking it by force.

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Nightlife 16

Warnings: dubcon, noncon, touching, coercion, manipulation, violence. Proceed with caution.

Note: I know what you’re thinking, why the fuck are you doing this? Well, you wanted bouncer Lee and I did too. Also, short!reader, not sorry.

Part of The Club AU

You’re almost shaking as you watch through the car window. Lee approaches the facade of your dorm building and shifts into park. You look up at the dingy brick and pout. It’s over. You knew that already but this is acceptance.

“We’ll just pack up,” he says as he turns off the engine, “get all your stuff in the car, then we can go home and send in your lease cancellation, like ya said.”

“Are you sure?” You squeak.

“Now, darlin’, I should be askin’ you. Thought I did and ya said yes,” he harrumphs as he hovers his hand on the door.

“I… Lee, I did,” you whine, “please, I’m just… I’m nervous. I thought– I thought school would be the next four years and now…”

“I know. None of us end up where we expect,” he reaches over to squeeze your shoulder, “but that’s usually for the best. I never thought I’d find me a girl like you, blossom.”

He leans over and kisses your cheek. Your lip quivers and you quickly turn away. He lets go and gets out on his side as you once more peek through the window. It’s not real until you open that door.

He grabs a stack of empty boxes from the back seat and comes around. He opens the door from the outside and you sit back, hanging your head. You unbuckle the seatbelt as he offers his free hand. He helps you out and you step out of the way of the door as he knocks it shut with his elbow.

He gestures you ahead of him with a nod. You lead him across the pavement and up the walk. Before you can get your keys out, you hear another car door and an angry voice. You whip around as your father marches across the grass.

“I’ve been waiting on you,” he snarls.

“Dad, what–”

“Come to get my money’s worth,” he ignores Lee as he approaches, “or what little I can. If you can get a degree, you’re not staying–”

“Nah, she ain’t,” Lee steps into your dad’s path, “she got a new place.”

“Who is this?”

“Dad, sir, uh–”

“I’m the one gonna take care of her. Like no one has before,” Lee insists.

Your father scoffs, “you–” you can’t see his face but you can hear his disgust, “she’s my daughter and you’re an old man.”

“Pot and kettle,” Lee sneers, “she’s an adult. She can make her own decisions.”

“She can’t even pass her first year, she doesn’t know–”

“She knows you’re a mean man. That you don’t care about her. You only care what she can give you, huh?” Lee moves with your father as he tries to sidestep him, “she’s smart in her own way, but you can’t see that. You just throw money at her and think she gonna be what you want.”

“I don’t know who you are, but you better move away from me,” your father snaps.

“I won’t, I’m gonna walk this young lady inside so she can pack up her things. You’ll get your money for the winter lease and all that.”

“She’s coming home. With me,” your dad retorts.

“She ain’t,” Lee turns and shoos you towards the door, “keep goin’, flower. We don’t got time to was–”

The boxes fly from his arms and one hits your shoulder. You stumble back as Lee spins and catches your father’s fist. He holds his wrist above him and lands a punch of his own smack dab in the middle of his face. Your father cries out as Lee lets him go, his hands covering his nose.

“Lee!” You run forward. “You hurt him.”

“Honey, he grabbed me,” Lee puts his arm out to stop you, hooking it around your middle. “I’m just defending myself. Protecting you.” He clings to you as your father bends and spits out blood, “he’s gonna take you away from me, is that what you want, darlin’?”

“N-no, but…” you don’t know what to say as your father stands straight, glaring at you. He’s mad, really mad. Like that time he broke your dollhouse.

“You always were a spoiled little brat,” he barks, “fine, stay with the old pervert. See if I care. You’re even more stupid than I could ever believe.” He steps closer and Lee inserts himself between you again, “my own blood, a fucking moron.”

You wilt and shrink down behind Lee. You hide behind him, ashamed and scalded by your father’s anger. You wait, listening, until you hear his retreat. He grumbles as his shoes mulch the grass and scatter pebbles across the sidewalk.

Lee faces you but you refuse to look at him. You focus on gathering the boxes, putting one inside the other in a neat stack. He stops you as he grabs the last one.

“You ain’t stupid, sweet thing, you know that,” he holds the box out of your reach so you have to look at him, “he’s the stupid one. Can’t see how special y’are.”

You frown and shrug. Lee sees the best in you but it only makes you feel worse. You wish he would see everything else; that you’re useless and awkward. You’re everything your dad ever said you were.

“Aw, don’t you be mopin’,” he places the box with the rest and turns back to you, “now, I can’t have you doin’ none of that. This is a happy day.”

“Lee…” you murmur and stare at your feet.

“Come on, give me a smile, now, puddin’,” he surprises you as he tickles your ribs suddenly. You squirm and yowl, letting out a stream of guffaws as you try to swat him away. “There you are. Eh, you know, darlin’, you’re so pretty when you smile.”

You sway back and forth, bashful, hugging your ribs protectively, “Lee…”

“I mean in. Ain’t never seen anything better,” he comes close and places his hands on your shoulders, “so give me a kiss cause I need some cheerin’ too.”

You tilt your head up as he bends towards you. You give him a kiss on the cheek and he hums. You stand flat on your feet again and flicks his finger up under your chin.

“That’ll do for now,” he teases with a wink, turning to pick up the boxes, “but I’ma give ya lots of lovin’ later. You deserve it.”

“Lee,” you gasp.

“Just some kisses,” he chuckles, “you like kisses, don’t ya?”

You giggle. Sometimes he makes you think of a teddy bear. All he wants are cuddles.

“Alright, then, let’s get goin’,” he heads towards the door.

You follow him and skirt around him as he gets to the door. You unlock it and hold it for him, his arms full. You climb the stairs, a few steps ahead of him, and wait at the top. You’re worried about Raquel but she should be gone for the holidays.

You let him into your dorm and lead him down to your room. Inside, you stop short. This is the last time you’ll be there. It’s a solemn feeling. A goodbye come too soon.

Lee pokes you with the box and apologises. You move so he can pass. He looks around and lets out a cluck as he sets the boxes down. He spins and takes in the cramped space.

“Dang, I thought me place was a bit small,” he shakes his head.

“It’s just me,” you say.

“Small thing too,” he smirks, “cute.”

You grin and look away shyly.

“Well,” you throw your hands up, “we should get started then.”

“Uh, yeah, s’pose we should,” he turns and takes a box, carrying it over to the tall dresser. He puts it on top and opens the top drawer before you can stop him. You rush over as he reaches inside. He takes out a handful of your panties. “Ah,” he drops all but one, a pair with little strawberries all over. He looks at you devilishly, “now why you never wore these one for me?”

“Lee,” you hiss.

“Don’t be coy now,” he folds them up and slips them in his pocket, “wifey.”

[fandomfluffandfuck]

Me when I get the most FOUL stucky thoughts in the middle of my math final:

S, I can’t BREATHE right now. I’m just picturing a shrunkyclunks situation where it’s the twinkiest James Barnes imaginable and big, fresh out of the ice (any sensitive as hell) Steve Rogers. Built like a brick house, and you look at him and think “Yeah, that guy is Daddy.” But then, one night, the two show up at the tower and throw everything out of the window. 

(listen. I’ve tried so many ways to explain why Steve and Bucky would show up at the Tower in kink mode, but I can’t seem to care. Just accept it.) 

Everyone is there showin’ off their subs, and of course everyone expects Steve to either show up and get red faced and flustered, or not show up at all. 

“They didn’t have this shit in his day, Nat. He’s gonna fucking explode.” 

“Shut up, Stark.”

What they are not expecting, however, is for the elevator doors to open to find Bucky in a nice black suit, holding a leash that’s attached to a collar on Steve’s throat. Steve, in an exquisite contrast to Bucky, is dressed in simply a lacy red, white, and blue lingerie set that pushes up his chest in a downright filthy way. Jaws are on the floor already, and they only drop lower when Bucky sits down on the couch, manspreading so that Steve can kneel between his thighs. Without looking at any of them, Bucky grips Steve’s chin and tilts it up to face him. A smirk grows on his face and a feminine, desperate whine slips from Steve’s swollen, kiss-bitten lips. 

“Can you tell your friends why we were late, puppy?” Bucky asks, his voice calm and collected, as if this isn’t the most erotic sight many of them have ever seen. Steve moans, shoving his face into Bucky’s thigh.

“B-because Daddy had to open me up…” He whimpers, and Tony actually has to sit down. A powerful smile crosses Bucky’s lips. 

“Good boy. What else?”

Steve whines, looking up at Bucky, his eyes heavy lidded and hazy. “Because I got too excited and Daddy had to fuck me so I wouldn’t be bad.” 

“Allfathers give me strength…” Thor curses under his breath, his pants significantly tighter than when the night started. Neither Steve nor Bucky paid him any mind, too wrapped up in each other to give a shit about what anyone else was doing. 

“That’s right, puppy. Can you tell everyone how it felt, knowing you’d be late because you’re so obsessed with Daddy?” Bucky’s tone, so light and calm, sends Steve flying. Steve nuzzles the now veryclear outline in Bucky’s pants, pressing sloppy, wet kisses to the fabric. He moans, squirming where he’s kneeling. 

“Oh, please! Daddy, felt so good. Wanna- ngh- Wanna be good. Daddy’s good puppy.” Steve begs, and Bucky pulls harshly on the leash, leaning down and forcing Steve to look at him. If you looked closely, you could even see the tears wetting his eyes. 

“Quiet.” He says harshly, before kissing Steve like he’s water in a desert. “What do you say? You were late, pup.”

Steve keens and turns to face his friends, blush high and bright on his face, painted down on his shoulders and chest. The blush makes it easier to see the bite marks on his pecs. 

“S-Sorry I was late.” He stutters, and immediately looks at Bucky for his approval. 

“I think I’m gonna pass out.” Banner says, draining his glass of wine in one gulp. 

Lmao, me. My mind is always in the gutter (can you tell? it's not like my entire blog is full of porn, nooo) but especially when I'm supposed to not be thinking about filthy shit. I love that for us, lol.

And I. Love. This.

I will always, always fuck with fresh-faced, big, built Steve Rogers that squirms like a little bitch [affectionate].

Hot damn.

(Fair, haha, maybe this is a BDSM AU? Where, it's just, like, totally normal for kink to be out in public these days? Maybe it was more restrained in the 30s but still certainly around?But who are we kidding, we don't need a reason. This is pure fantasy, haha)

CHOKEHOLD

This has a chokehold on me. I am LIVING for the exhibitionism.

"Jaws are on the floor already, and they only drop lower when Bucky sits down on the couch, manspreading so that Steve can kneel between his thighs."

Yeahhh 😮‍💨😮‍💨

"'Can you tell your friends why we were late, puppy?'"

Christ.

yes yes yes

I love Steve flipping all expectations and impressing them all. It's just so 🤌🏻good🤌🏻 There's something about it that never gets old. (It's the exhibitionist in me, that's what 💀💀) Just the idea of Steve being filthy and unashamed but still so blushy hits.

Thank you so fucking much for this. I fuck with this hard.

I've been doing a lot of fic rec'ing lately but this feels spiritually connected to "the audacity" by the mcwho. It's bottom Bucky that leads Steve around by the dick, and it's actually crack-smut, but it is everything. It's similar in the flipping of expectations with the Avengers assuming Steve is a boring fuck because he's from the 30s 👀

Thanks again 😘

[kittyplayz1]

Oh my god. Oh my fucking god.

So people who have been following me for a while might know that I play the sims 4, and like to make sims of characters in fandoms I like.

When I launched the game today, I saw a thing on the main menu for a survey to take, about “community interest in potential pack ideas”

These ideas were all pretty solid, and a few were a little exciting.

But one of them.

One of the stated pack ideas has me feral and if they don’t make it I’m gonna drive to EA’s headquarters and throw bricks at windows until they agree to make it.

Because it’s basically a Batman Pack.

Like listen to this description:

"shape your sims fate in a gritty city overrun by crime."

That’s Gotham!

“Pick pocketing for grilled cheese can quickly evolve into daring jewel heists”

That’s Catwoman!

“Rise through the ranks of the city as a mafia boss, a crime fighting hero, or play both sides”

THATS RED HOOD

If I don’t get this fucking expansion pack I’m gonna kill someone. I’ll burn down multiple EA offices.

So in summary if y’all could go grab sims 4 on steam or the ea app (it’s free) and take the survey to tell them that you would also like to see that pack, I’ll love you forever.

[theknightmarket]

HAPPY NEW YEAR, LADS! Here’s some incorrect quotes to celebrate that were meant to be for the anniversary, but I forgot about them. Spoilers for fics that I’m toying with or am in the process of writing!

Dark: If you could guess, how many brain cells do you have?  Wilford: Dorito’s cool ranch.  Dark:  Dark: I'm just gonna assume zero for now.  Wilford: I love that song.

Illinois: You know you can die from that, right?  Bond!Reader: *smoking a cigarette* That’s the point.  Google: *drinking alcohol* We’re trying to speed this up.  Bing: *Eating raw cookie dough and nodding*

Dark: I'm going to ask you to be respectful.  Mark, after kidnapping the DA: I will politely decline.

Detective!Reader: You’re alive.  Murdock: No need to sound so disappointed.

Engineer!Reader, with a headache: Advil me up, daddy.  Google: I will short out the language centre of your brain if you say anything like that ever again.

Yancy: If there’s one thing I learned from Bing, it’s to set people’s expectations real low, so you end up surprising them by practically doing nothing at all.

Heist!Reader: Dammit, Mark, you ruined everything!  Heist: You’re welcome.

Dark: Fine! I don't give a shit!  DA!Reader, watching him keep coming back from the mirror: You seem to give a lot of shit for someone who claims not to give a shit.

Bing: Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, that’s fucked up. Like c'mon, you know I’m dumb as hell!

(Engineer!Reader is on a business trip) Google: Ew. What kind of tea is this?  Bing: I boiled gatorade.

Heist: Please, picking locks is my specialty.  Heist: *throws a brick through the window*  Heist: Okay, let’s go.

*Everyone is standing around the broken coffee maker*  Ghosts!Reader: So. Who broke it? I'm not mad, I just wanna know. 

Everyone: Engineer: ...I did. I broke it.  Reader: No. No, you didn't. Wilford?  Wilford: Don't look at me. Look at Mark.  Mark: What?! I didn't break it.  Wilford: Huh, that's weird. How'd you even know it was broken?  Mark: Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken.  Wilford: Suspicious.  Mark: No, it's not!  Damien: If it matters, probably not, but Noir was the last one to use it.  Noir: Liar! I don't even drink that crap!  Damien: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?  Noir: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, Damien! Engineer: Okay let's not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, cap.  Reader: No! Who broke it!?  Everyone: Yancy:  Hey, bud… Illinois' been awfully quiet.  Illinois: rEALLY?!  *Everyone starts arguing*  Reader, talking to Host: I broke it. It burned my hand so I punched it.  Reader: I predict 10 minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick.  Reader:  Reader: Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.

Murdock: So you like cats?  Detective!Reader: Yeah.  Murdock: *tries to impress them by slowly pushing a glass off the table*

Police!Reader: We are gathered here today because someone- *glares at Mark’s coffin* -couldn’t stay alive!

Engineer!Reader: Why are you two always out during rainstorms?  Google: It’s so peaceful and refreshing. I love the smell of rain.  Bing: Google bet me I couldn’t get struck by lighting, but he’s WRONG.

The police chief, pointing to Murdock’s empty cell: YOU LET HIM ESCAPE?!?  Detective!Reader: I WAS ON BREAK.

Detective!Reader: I’m going to take you out. Murdock: Great, it’s a date! Detective!Reader: I meant that as a threat.  Murdock: See you at five!

Actor!Reader, struggling to keep upright in their 1 inch heels: Yeah, I-I don’t really think heels are for me. Actor, pointing at them and walking flawlessly in sparkly golden 6 inch heels: WEAK.

Bing: I'm incredibly fast at math. Engineer!Reader: Alright, what's 30 x 17? Bing: 47. Engineer!Reader: That's not even close. Bing: But it was fast.

Police!Reader: Go to Hell. Actor: I wish I could.

Dark: In light of what you did for me, you can hug me for four to five seconds. DA!Reader: FORTY-FIVE SECONDS?!? Dark: No! Four to five seconds! DA!Reader: Too late!!!

*Damien and College!Reader skipping stones on lake* Damien: It’s such a beautiful evening. College!Reader, whispering: Take that you fucking lake.

Actor: So that’s my plan. Police!Reader: Are you alright with constructive criticism? I don’t want to sound mean. Actor: No, go ahead, I want to hear it. Detective!Reader: It fucking sucks. Actor: That’s not constructive criticism.

Bartender!Reader: Can you please be serious for five minutes?  Wilford: My record is four, but I think I can do it.

Actor!Reader: How petty can you get? Actor: I once edited a Wikipedia article to win an argument I was wrong about.

Illinois: Yancy and I were crossing the street, and this dude drove by and honked at us. Criminal!Reader: *Sighing* What did Yancy do?  Illinois: He chased him to the next red light, then reached into his window and...  Yancy: Who wants a steering wheel?

Dark: Why. why did you give the DA a KNIFE?! Wilford: I’m sorry. They said they felt unsafe. Dark: Now I feel unsafe! Wilford: I’m sorry. Wilford: ... would you like a knife?

*DA!Reader and Wilford sitting in jail together* DA!Reader: So who should we call? Wilford: I’d call Dark, but I feel safer in jail.

Engineer: Gunther, can I talk to you for a second? Gunther: Yeah, what’s up? Lemme guess. You and Cap are having problems and you want me to teach you how to kiss? Engineer: What? No, stop that. I know how to kiss. I’ve read books.

Ghosts!Reader: Who the fuck added me to a fucking group chat?  Engineer: >:O language. Bing: Yeah watch your fucking language. Yancy: OKAY WHO TAUGHT BING THE FUCK WORD?  Google: 'The fuck word'.  Noir: Are you stupid? You all use the f word all the time.  Wilford: Oh my god he censored it. Illinois: Say fuck, Noir.  Mark: Do it, Noir. Say fuck.

Host: If you bite it and you die, it’s poisonous. If it bites you and you die, it’s venomous.  Mark: What if it bites me and it dies!?  Dark: Then you’re poisonous. Jesus Christ, Mark, learn to listen.  Yancy: What if it bites itself and I die?  Noir: That’s voodoo.  Bing: What if it bites me and someone else dies?  Google: That’s correlation, not causation.  Illinois: What if we bite each other, and neither of us die?  Wilford: That’s kinky.  Ghosts!Reader: I hate this house.

Sheriff!Reader: Died and came back as a cowboy, I call that reintarnation.

Mark, setting down a card: Ace of spades. Dodger, pulling out an Uno card: +4. Enis, pulling out a Pokémon card: Jolteon, I choose you! Survivor!Reader, trembling: What are we playing?

Actor: You lying, cheating, piece of shit! Actor!Reader: Oh yeah? You’re the idiot who thinks you can get away with everything you do. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD! Actor: I’m leaving you, and I’M TAKING JULIET WITH ME. Toby, picking up the monopoly board: I think we’re gonna stop playing now.

[mollymagician]

Dreamling Week Day 7: AUs

…been battling with this for a month. Dreamling people, ilu, I haven’t wanted to write chapter-length fic in years, what have you done to my brain.

Wanted to have a whole first chapter to post but getting ready to travel for a week messed up my whole groove. Human AU. Dream is a reclusive street artist who can do things that are inexplicable. Hob is intrigued, and also glad it’s not pink penises this time. Matthew is Matthew, with thumbs.

Hob woke at too-fucking-early o’clock on a Wednesday morning to a text from Matthew. Several texts, in fact, though all but the first were just strings of exclamation points and emojis. Which wasn’t entirely unusual but he was entirely too tired to try and decipher it all.

Might want to come down and see this, boss, we got Dreamed!

“What the hell??” He scrubbed his hands over his face and rolled over, shoving the phone beneath the pillow. It wasn’t the best idea he’d ever had, considering it continued to buzz. Incessantly.

Hooooob

Hob, I know you’re awake

Get down here my good dude

Robert.

Im gonna throw rocks at your window again

HHOOOOOOOOOBB

Christ all right I’m coming

he texted back, eventually, toothbrush dangling out of his mouth. Five minutes, a pair of jeans and yesterdays jumper later he was clattering down the stairwell that led from his flat to the side lot of the pub that occupied the lower level of the building. He pushed open the exterior door and ran face-first into a small crowd.

“Matthew!!!” he called. “Matt, what is the— oh, hell.”

Matthew— good friend, pub manager, and reason why the ground under his window was littered with landscaping gravel— pushed his way past the gawkers and said, “Morning!”

Hob tilted his head, trying to make sense of what he was seeing with fifteen people plus Matthew sticking their phones in his line of sight to snap photos. “Yeah, good bloody morning. What exactly am I looking at?”

Graffiti was what they were all looking at, presumably, but the last time he’d had to scrub any off the side of the Inn, it was a neon pink penis and the words BITE ME MARGARET. This was altogether different. Over an area eight feet wide by nearly eight feet tall, each individual brick in the New Inn’s dignified old facade was…colored? It created a pixelated riot of hues, but Hob couldn’t see any particular rhyme or reason behind it.

Matthew elbowed him. “Cool, huh?”

“I…suppose?” Hob said. “I mean, usually when we get vandalized it’s just someone wanting to slag off the monarchy or something, I guess this is a nice change.”

Matthew snorted. He reached out and plopped a hand down unceremoniously on the top of Hobs head. He tugged him backwards a few feet, and then a bit to the right, waggled his head just so, and said, “There, look again.”

Hob blinked and did as he was told. “Oh.”

Sunflowers. An eight-foot-tall bunch of sunflowers splashed across the brickwork, now clear as day when before they’d been a choppy blur.

“Eh!? Eh!?? I know, right!”

Hob stepped past the thinning gaggle of onlookers and reached out to touch the wall at eye level, rendered a brilliant golden yellow by—whatever this was. It hadn’t been here the day before and he expected still-damp paint, but it was something soft and powdery that flaked off the brickwork and stained his fingers. “Is that…chalk?”

“Yeah, I forget how out of touch you are these days.” Matthew followed, snapping closeups from a few different angles as he went. “He always uses chalk. Or she. Maybe she. Not trying to be, you know, sexist. S’just they’ve got that whole Bansky thing going on right now so who the hell knows, really.”

Hob’s felt his eyebrows doing the complicated little dance they did anytime he was trying to follow along with one of Matthews tangents. “They who?” he finally managed.

Matthew pointed to the bottom corner of the mural, where, rendered in weirdly precise swirls of chalk, was the word DREAM.

[codenamehazard]

.:(Kill All) Sons of Bitches:.

Chapter 10: (Kill All) Sons of Bitches

Hey guys!

Another chapter, another doozy! Things are really picking up in the Wildlands and in a hurry. This chapter took a while, a lot of rewriting, a lot of head-banging, a lot of staring at a wall while eating copious amounts of fruit snacks, lots of kitty cuddles, but I made it in the end!

Big, big, BIIIIIIIIG shoutout to @rogueshadeaux for her help in making sure everything wasn't a jumbled mess. She deserves all the love in the world and if you're a fan of InFAMOUS, check her out!

And without further ado, here's chapter 10!

----------------

I stare out the window of the jeep as the humming of the wheels drone on in my ears. Thoughts flitting through my head as I watch the seemingly endless expanse of flat land pass. It feels like life was throwing me curveball after curveball and making my head spin. The ride thus far has been quiet. It was that weird and fucking awkward quiet that just makes everyone uncomfortable. Even with Pangolin trying to ease the tension, the short answers from me or Kestrel made it abundantly clear it wasn’t going to work.

Speaking of the bird, I occasionally glance over at her, she has a window down as is currently airplaning her hand in the wind, making it go up and down. She’s pressing up against the other side of the jeep as far as she can go. Aside from the arm out the window, she looks like a pouting child. Not even looking at me save for brief looks. Fine by me, the important thing is that she’s not running her mouth.

Looking at her causes a question to pop back up into my head. It may not have been obvious at the start, but looking back it was clear. Mako knew that the gunsmith she was talking about was Kestrel, but why didn’t she tell me sooner? At least then I wouldn’t have been blindsided. I’ll have a chat with her later after this little outing.

There was also the issue of this “they” thing that I’ve been hearing about. This enigmatic boogieman that has an entire town of full fledged conduits scared out of their mind, so scared that it’s making Kestrel act stupid. Risking her neck to complete a project for what I can only guess is some sort of super weapon against whatever the hell “they” are. Is it that big of a deal? If it was, why haven’t I encountered these things? I’ve been on my own for a while so surely I would have seen something.

I lurch forward as the jeep comes to a stop, the movement taking me out of my thoughts. Pangolin shuts the jeep off as I get out and stretch my arms and legs. I watch Pango out of the corner of my eye as he gets out the pickaxes from the passenger seat and hands one of the tools to Kestrel.

I look at my Amp and frown. It was in bad shape and I feared that if I used it any more than I already have, it would break apart. I’ve managed to keep it usable thus far, but the only one who could truly fix and restore it is dead. Been dead for a very long time…

I walk over to Pangolin as I take the Amp off of my sling. He looks over and pulls out a pickaxe.

“Here.” He says simply. “You’re gonna need this.” I nod and take the tool before giving him the Amp. Pangolin looks at it before looking at me.

“What’s this?” He asks as he examines it.

“It’s mine.” I snap. “Make sure nothing happens to it while I’m gone.”

“Alright, I’ll keep it in the Jeep.” He states as he slips it into the trunk. I raise an eyebrow.

“You’re not coming with?” I ask, Pangolin shakes his head.

“I’m gonna be staying up here to guard the entrance as well as to make sure nobody tries to jack the jeep.” The brick wall states matter-of-factly. “Now, there is one thing I have to stress to you two. I know you hate each-other's guts, but for the love of God, do not get separated and watch each-other’s backs.”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah.” Kestrel huffs, already looking like she’s raring to go. “Buddy system, stay close, don’t wander off.”

“I mean it, Kestrel.” Pangolin chides. “Last thing we need is to have to send the others after the two of you and hope you’re still alive because you got lost.”

“I get it! Jesus!” The bird snaps. I roll my eyes at her childish behavior and I see Pangolin pinch the bridge of his nose. Makes me wonder if this is normal for the two or not. “Get in, get the materials, get out. Short, sweet, to the point.”

“Just don’t kill each-other. I’ll keep watch and if you guys don’t come back up at sun-down, I’ll radio for help and come down to get you.” Pangolin states before pulling out his gun and starts a patrol around the entrance. Kestrel and I take this as our cue to head inside. So with pickaxe in the sling and the bird chomping at the bit, we venture into the dark and the unknown to seek our prizes.

—-

My arms hum and buzz with power as crimson sparks jump off of my arms, bathing the mine in its light. I can tell this place has seen better days, lots of old mining equipment and wires. The old junk, the darkness and the claustrophobic feeling of being enclosed reminds me of being back in the sewer systems of Empire City, looking for sub-stations to power up and gain power in kind. Only difference is I don't have to fear death by water, it smells slightly better and what I seek isn’t a power-station, but this natural Rayacite Kestrel and Pangolin briefed me about.

I lick my lips as I can sense the energy of the natural shards and cores, but with so many energy signatures, it's impossible to pinpoint exactly where they are, even with my enhanced Radar Pulse, and the topography of the cave system doesn’t help any. I look over to the bird to ask if she has any bright ideas, but it seems like she’s way ahead of me on that.

Her hand on the ground, eyes closed and with what looks like small filaments coming from her hand. The mental image of a dog with their nose to the ground trying to pick up a scent comes to mind. I watch her sway slightly and turn her head before opening her eyes and looking down a tunnel, pointing at it.

“This way.” She states, eyes focused on the opening. “I picked up high concentrations of pure RFE coming from that direction, high likelihood of high quality shards and cores.” I blink at her in disbelief before scoffing.

“And how do you know that?" I sneer.

"I told you I have a knack for it, now are you going to come or not?" She snips as she starts to go down the path. “How else did you think I made a bee-line to the shards?” I roll my eyes and follow her down the path.

“Figured you followed me.” I state bluntly, flicking my arms to help combat the pins and needles that sting my nerves. She rolls her eyes. I notice something that I find odd. Very rarely was there a time that the damn bird actually walked like a normal person, preferring to dart and dash around in plumes. Yet here, she wasn’t. She’s actually walking and dare I say… Looking a bit nervous?

“Well, I didn’t. The others sometimes call me their “shard-hound” because of my knack. One of the reasons why I’m the scout of the group.” She snips as she keeps walking. I shake my head in irritation before a devious thought crosses my mind. I know I can’t kill the bird, I need my gun… But there’s nothing stopping me from pissing her off. With an evil grin on my face and while she’s distracted with looking around, I give the girl a small zap, causing her to yelp. I snicker to myself as she turns around and looks at me pissed.

“The hell was that for?!” She hisses out and I just smirk at her, I don’t need to tell her a damn thing and I can see it’s aggravating her. “I’m glad you think that’s funny, you won’t be laughing if you keep it up!” Awww, she’s trying to threaten me. How adorable.

“And what if I do, what are you gonna do about it?” I jeer with a shit-eating grin. She pinches the bridge of her nose.

“It’s not what…” She sputters before looking at me like I’m an idiot. “Look, the Wildlands have few rules, but there is one rule she’s gonna drill into your head just like it’s been drilled into mine and that is if you go looking for raw Rayacite, you do not start flinging your powers around all haphazardly! You use enough to help you navigate and that’s it!” Her voice takes a serious tone, I frown at this.

“What are you going on about, girl?” I scoff as she fumes. “It’s an abandoned mine, we’re the only ones here and even if there are others here. I know I’ll wipe the floor with them.” A puff of smoke expels from Kestrel’s mouth as she face-palms.

“Look, I know you don’t trust me, there’s no dancing around that, but for the love of God will you at least trust me on this?? This isn’t my first time diving into these deathtraps so I know what the fuck I am talking about.” She gripes while looking at me. Deathtraps? Okay, I get that cave-ins are an issue and all, but to be this worked up? Really? I see the bird sigh again.

“Just… Trust me on this and let’s keep moving. The longer we stand around bickering, the more likely we’re gonna be spotted.” She hisses out before continuing on. Again with the vagueness, but she does have a point. We can go back and forth, but it won’t get us any closer to my prize, so we continue on.

The deeper we go into the mine, the stronger the energy signatures become and the more my mouth waters. Whatever the bird was doing, she wasn’t kidding about having that knack. It isn’t just the strength of the signatures that’s growing stronger, there is… Something else about it. The way the energy feels more… Concentrated. Purified? Whatever it is, it feels good.

I watch Kestrel look around, sweeping her head left to right almost like a searchlight. Are her eyes… Glowing purple? It’s one of those things where one moment it’s there but when I blink it’s suddenly gone. I’ll have to ask her later, but for now, we move on deeper.

A wave of raw RFE hits me like a truck when Kestrel and I walk into a large cavern dotted with deposits of crystals and metal that glow with that familiar purple-blue light. I stare wide eyes as I look around, my body hungering for the variable buffet on display. Well I’ll be damned, the bird is as useful as she claims to be.

Speaking of the bird, I look over at her and I see an expression familiar. Hunger. She licks her chops before she does the spot-light headsweep motion. Looks like I ain’t the only one who craves Shards. She better not get any crazy ideas. I intensify the sparks on my arms in warning and she gives me a look that’s a mix of “what the fuck are you doing” and “are you insane.” I grin at the expression, at least she knows she’s on thin ice and is less likely to do anything stupid. I watch as the bird climbs up to a cluster and tap it before nodding and signaling for me to come up. I nod back and join her, the hunger gnawing at my stomach something fierce being so close to just… Pure Rayacite. It’s nothing I’ve ever experienced before.

“Pick a cluster for yours.” Kestrel gestures with her hand as she gets her pickaxe out. “Once you pick, you mine it, I’ll grab it and then I’ll do the same for mine, but once metal hits ‘cite, we need to hust-”

“Woah, woah, woah, lil birdie.” I interrupt her. “Why the rush? You’ve been awfully jumpy ever since we’ve stepped in here and I see no reason why. I haven’t seen not hide nor hair of anything. No animals, no other people. Not even sensed anything. It’s just you and me, so why shouldn’t I take my time? Maybe take some extra for the road?” I can’t help but to snicker as Kestrel looks like she’s about to pull her hair out.

“Just because you can’t see or sense anything don’t mean they aren’t there, you overgrown sparkplug!” She whisper-yells while staring at me like I’m an idiot, I can’t help but to snicker at the bird’s flapping. “Don’t laugh, this is serious! You think the humans and monsters you had to face in the past were a pain, the things that like to call mines like this home are 10 times worse!” I scoff before laughing.

“I’ll believe it when I see it.” I sneer before I walk over and hover my hand over the clusters. Kestrel’s probably bullshitting about whatever the hell she’s going on about, probably wanting to keep the rest of the goodies to herself. Like I’m gonna let that happen. Still… That tone in her voice and the look in her eyes, what if she’s right? That’s not the look of someone acting, something isn’t quite right.

Oh well.

I take the pickaxe off of my sling and stretch my arms before swinging the pick. The metal point connects to the glowing cluster I have chosen and with that strike, sparks fly and a wave of RFE hits me. I can feel my body absorb the raw energy like a sponge and goddamn does it feel good. Another strike and another wave, a manic grin starts to form. This pure, raw energy. I want more, more. I strike the cluster harder, more sparks, more energy, but it’s not enough. This is going too slow!

… Why the hell am I using this stupid pickaxe? I have something much better.

My eyes glow red and the heat in my body intensifies. Sparks gather in my hand as I stare at the shard-cluster, grinning with hunger.

“Cole, what are you doing?” I hear Kestrel ask, her voice filled with fear, but I ignore her. I know she warned me about using my powers in here, but I don’t give a shit. To hell with her nonsense. “Are you trying to get us both killed??”

I feel the energy build in my hand as I take aim, I see Kes panicking out of the corner of my eye and it fills my heart with schadenfreude. With a hum and a dark chuckle, I fire.

BOOM!!! 

Crystals and metal fly as an immense amount of RFE bursts out and washes over the both of us. Power flows through my body like a raging current and my grin grows so wide, my cheek starts to hurt, I even begin to laugh. It feels so good! So fucking good!! I start grabbing shards and draining them with a wild eagerness.

Kestrel just stares at me, her face pale with a visceral fear. I see her a hot second to grab 4 pieces of high quality shard and a monster of a blast core. Normally I’d fry her right then and there, but there was plenty so she can have a few, as a treat. I can see hunger in her eyes as she gathers the bits, but fear was overriding it. Heh, bet she’s really realizing that I’m someone who can back up when I say “I will get what I want.”

A cacophony of screeches, screams and roars stop my power crazed thoughts dead in their tracks as I see Kestrel’s head bolt up, if her face could have gone any paler, it would have. Her eyes wide in absolute terror. The noises sound human and inhuman at the same time, the only thing I’ve heard closest to this noise is the screaming of the Reapers, but even they didn’t sound this gnarly.

“We need to go… Now…” Kestrel whispers in a quiet tone, I just give her a questioning look. “You’ve gone and kicked the hornet’s nest, we need to leave before the horde shows up.” Did… Did she not just see what I did to the wall? Did she forget what I am capable of?

“What and miss out on the fun?” I scoff, looking over at her as I pop my knuckles. “Fat chance.” I grab another shard and absorb it before making my way to where I heard the scream-fest.

“Cole, I swear to God if you go in to face those things, I’m leaving your ass! I’ve got what I’ve come for so I have no qualms!” I couldn’t help but to laugh at Kestrel’s little tantrum, showing her cowardly colors again, hm?

“You can go run off and hide under skirts again, fine by me.” I sneer as I wave a hand at her dismissively. “That’s just leaves this aaaaaaaall for me.” The thought of having an entire mine of pure Rayacite to myself causes a shiver to rush up and down my spine. All that power, all mine. Mine to do as I see fit.

“You are. Insufferable!!” The bird screeches before she takes off down the path, leaving me alone to have all the fun. Her loss, no skin off my nose. I’ll juice up, have my fun and then I can gloat when I get bored of target practice and make the girl hold up her end of the deal, after all, fair is fair.

I go back to trekking when I sense the presence of others, it was strange because it was Conduit like, but something wasn’t quite right, not like it matters. They’ll go down all the same. The screaming grows louder and that’s when I see them.

A throng of people, rushing blindly, but these people looked sick. Really sick. Pale as death and emaciated, they made the Reapers look healthy and that’s saying something. They scrambled and shambled as they screamed, looking like something out of a horror film, but the thing that stood out the most to me was their energy, their face, nails, and what dripped from their mouths and eyes.

Their energy felt like RFE was bleeding out of them. Their teeth and nails, more like claws, look to be made out of purple, crystalline Rayacite and the stuff dripping from their faces was the same glowing purple hue that the shards are.

Were these the things that Kestrel was talking about?

I smirk and start blasting, my powers currently charged up with Beast energy and the extra juice, the bolts crash and explode. Making short work of the first wave of the horde, but I quickly notice that A) the concussive forces of the charged bursts were starting to shake the entire mine and B) instead of turning tail and running away, more flocked. All screaming with a feral hunger.

In the beginning, it wasn’t too hard to fight them off and I reveled in the challenge I was given, but over time, they just kept coming. It was like a stampede. It doesn’t matter how weak a target is, if they just keep coming like this, the numbers can be too much.

Blasts and shockwaves fly out of my hands as I move, climbing around and keeping on the move so I’m not a sitting duck. The more I take out, the more husks crawl out of the caverns. Jesus Christ, how many of these things were in here??

They start to get too close, way too close. Their mistake. A small grin starts to form as I pop an ionic charge, red and black energy whirls around me and starts to pull in the energy of the things around me. My grin widens as I expect to feel a rush of power flood my senses, but the smile was short lived when instead of the pleasure, I felt pain. I double over and start to cough and sputter violently, spark popping off of my body. What the hell was that?! I pull out my pickaxe and swing wildly to keep the bastards at bay, but my head is throbbing and I feel sick. It was like getting a faceful of that damned black tar Sasha always spat out, but worse! Raging headache, nausea and my powers wigging out.

I continue to fight, now swinging the pickaxe around to knock heads. I’d be lying if I said that fear isn’t rising inside me as the horde closes in, seeming hellbent on attacking me. It was like I was a light and these bastards were the moths. I scream in rage as I swing and blast. I’m not gonna let these fuckers cut my life short, not here. Not like this!!

CRASH!!!

The sound of a rail-system collapsing and a burst of RFE grabs the attention of the fuckers long enough to me to get my barings straight again and hit the crowds with a couple of Alpha Blasts, my powers weren’t behaving right, trying to do more was making me dizzy, but I at least made myself breathing room. Shaking my head, I go back to swinging. Arcing hits rip into the bodies of the shambling horde and weaken them, but they don’t seem to drop.

I growl to myself when I hear a loud burst and see glowing shrapnel rip into a few of the things, tearing their bodies apart and I see a plume of shimmering smoke dart around and make its way towards me. Well I’ll be damned, the bird came back.

With rapid firing bursts of smoke and slag, she rushes in to join me in the clearing I made and assists in making it bigger with more shotgun shards tearing through the bodies.

"What happened to "leaving my ass?"" I sneer as I fire off a volley of Alpha bolts at the crowd. She turns to me and gives me a hot iron glare.

"Can it, bug-zapper." She snaps. “I hate you and you’re an absolute cockwomble asshole, but we came in here as a team, we’re leaving as one.” She takes her pickaxe and buries it into the head of a lunging husk.

"Awww, well ain’t you a peach." I scoff as we move back to back, surrounded by the horde, but we both see a way out and we both know what we need to do.

"Shut it and aim for the head!!" Kestrel snarls at me. I roll my eyes, but she doesn’t need to tell me twice.

We nod to each-other before slag and sparks start flying and pickaxes start swinging. The bird’s got one hell of a swing, I’ll give her that. She darts and dashes around in the same flighty and dancey patterns that I remember from when I chased her, but there was a shift in her style. She’d put her hand in a monster’s face before unleashing a barrage of slag shards, completely obliterating the head before she leaps off and buries the tip of the tool into the brain case of another. Her eyes glowing hot and her annoyed expression slowly twisting to a grin.

My own pickaxe whistles as I run up the body of one of the things and slam the tip into the head of the fucker, using my strength to fling the stuck husk into a small grouping in the horde, causing them to fall over. A couple of Skull bolts light up the air with crimson sparks as heads explode and those unlucky enough to not get popped get their heads crushed underfoot or under spike. My own face curling into a sadistic smile as I impale one of the fuckers square between the eyes and send volts straight into the brain.

We slowly made our way towards the exit, grace and power fueled by brutality as charred bodies and bloody gore fly. Kestrel watching my back and I watching hers. Making short work of the waves. The fuckers put up a fight, their claws rip into our skin and we got hit a few times more than we’d like, ripping clothes and tearing flesh. The more we fight, the more they come, like piranhas to the scent of blood.

“Got any ideas, birdie?” I shout as I fry a husk. “These bastards just keep coming!”

“Jesus Christ, this is a full blown nest!” Kestrel exclaims as she curbstomps a fucker on the ground. “We’re gonna have to blow up the entrance and cave the place in to keep the fuckers from following us!”

“And how are we gonna do that?” I retort to her and I see her point at a large cluster of shards.

“Shoot that.” She states matter-of-factly before she yelps, getting hit in the side by a husk. She grabs its head and cooks it before throwing it into his buddy that was trying to jump me. “You recovered enough from the botched drain to turn loose one of those missiles?” She asks and I give a quick nod. It will do a number on me, but I can do it.

“Count of three, I shoot, we run?” I ask as I watch Kestrel charge up a strong burst of her own.

“Yeah, Count of three, you shoot, I blast, we run.” She confirms with a nod. Back to back once again, we aim at our respective targets.

3…. 2…. 1…..

I fire off an Alpha Rocket at the shard cluster and the bird unleashes a large volley of shards that rip into anyone poor fucker in the way, making a clearing for us to run.

The mine starts to rumble and shake, causing the horde to scream in rage and panic. We both stumble from the shaking, but we waste no time in making a bee-line to the exit, dodging falling rubble and debris all the while. It isn’t long until we emerge from the darkness and into the fading light of day.

Seeing the jeep and Pangolin was a sight for sore eyes as the two of us scramble into the jeep. Pangolin looks at us questioningly, looks like he was in the middle of making a call.

“Kestrel? Cole?” He questions. “I was about to-”

“DRIVE!” Kestrel barks, interrupting her friend. He looked like he was about to scold her, but when he saw the dust being kicked up by the collapsing tunnels, he held his tongue and floored it. The rapid acceleration jostling the two of us around before we got settled in and buckled up.

Panting, I lay back in my seat and I see Kestrel burying her head into the back of the driver’s seat. We were both wiped out and I know I have so many more questions to ask, but I have a feeling that I may get to ask them soon.

I turn my head to face the horizon and relax at the sight of the sunset colors. There’s a high likelihood that Pangolin might stop to set up camp when we lose all the daylight, but I don’t care. Camp means rest, rest means I can try and sleep off the remainder of this.. I don’t even know what the fuck it is.

There is one thing I can take some solace in, that ordeal is over and now I’m one step closer to getting my new toy. A smirk twitches on my face at the thought as now Kestrel will have no choice but to make me my weapon after going through that hell.

After all, a deal is a deal.

[wintrwinchestr]

Hiiiiiiii Winter! Popping in with a random question about your page. What is a "brick fucking master"? Are you very skilled at fucking bricks? Is Brick Master a name and the fucking is for emphasis (like Amanda Fucking Palmer)? Is it a reference that is clearly flying over my head?

I've been thinking about this for like two days so I am very curious, thank yewwwww

LMAOOO this is so funny, I suppose it is a very confusing reference out of context.

It’s a line from Left Behind, the kind of bonus TLOU game that tells the story of how Ellie got her bite. It’s what episode 7 of TLOU was based on!! There’s a mini game where Ellie and Riley throw bricks at car windows, to see who can break all the windows of their car first. Before they start playing Ellie says “I’m like, the brick master” and when Ellie wins the mini game she yells “brick fucking MASTER!!!” (I’m gonna try to add a gif of this moment, we’ll see if it works lol)

I am unfortunately not very skilled at fucking bricks. Just at picking very specific TLOU things to reference. Thank you for the laugh on this fine Saturday evening 😂💖

[pikmingrubb]

Mike and Jimmy kidnap(not actually) you and go to a local coffee place.

Tags: Fluff, mentions of depression, coffee place

Word Count: 2,599

“No, don’t bother.” Mike said glancing at Jimmy in the passenger seat, he sighed and leaned back before taking out his binoculars and peering through them.

“Don’t bother?” Jimmy scoffed throwing his hands up, he tried wriggling in the seat slightly before angrily removing the seat belt as it blocked his flailing motions. Mike paid no mind as he picked up his coffee and took a sip, continuing his people watching from afar.

Jimmy had tagged along with Mike, who begrudging allowed him to tag along. Mike didn’t even tell him what he was doing, Jimmy just assumed it was something Mike had recently talked about for him. He wanted details of a client, and Mike had agreed to help, but this was not the reason he was out there.

“If you’re gonna’ be here, at least stop moving around so much.” Mike said exasperated, he finally let the binoculars rest on his thigh as he blatantly glared at Jimmy.

“I’m trying to get comfortable; your new car isn’t as nice as the old one.”

“Stop complaining and look out the window for anything.”

Jimmy opened his mouth like he wanted to argue, and promptly closed it, before frowning and turning his gaze to the road. Mike felt relief as he finally settled down, Jimmy just sat with his hands crossed over his chest, focusing as much as he possibly could at this boring intersection.

Mike thought he had peace a moment too soon before Jimmy interrupted his work yet again.

“What are we even looking for? I’m just seeing junkies hang around a gas station and people pumping gas into their expensive digs?” Jimmy complained, he was starting to think this had nothing to do with his job he asked Mike for.

Mike had just about enough, he was ready to tell Jimmy to take a hike before Jimmy’s phone started to ring. They both paused for a second and looked at the buzzing device on the dash, Mike just glared at him. A thousand tongue lashings into one glance, Jimmy swallowed and reached for the device and gave a small apology before glancing at the screen to see the caller ID.

“Answer it, put it on speaker.” Mike demanded; Jimmy shot him a look of “what the fuck are you talking about?”. Reluctantly Jimmy flipped open his phone and clicked the speaker button.

“Heyyy, buddy! How’s it going?” Jimmy answered in a light toned voice, his face said the opposite as he placed the cellphone brick on the middle console for Mike to glare at.

There was a slight pause on the other side of the phone, static filled it and Jimmy’s heart pounded.

“Jimmy, what the fuck are you two doing?” Rang your angry tone, your voice sounded slightly distorted, outside noises could be heard of cars passing and people honking. Jimmy’s brows raised slightly; he was desperately trying to understand what you were talking about.

“Jimmy,” Your voice called out, your toned turned demanding, “I can see you and Mike creeping around here. I’m on break, I’m coming over.” Before Jimmy could get a response out the phone clicked and the call had ended.

Mike just stared at Jimmy, an emotion he couldn’t quite understand laced his face, he watched as Jimmy practically freaked out in his seat.

He tried sputtering out a sentence, hands flailing and pointing at both him and Mike. He just stared in amusement as he tried to communicate properly.

“You know him!?” Was all Jimmy could manage to get out, he seemed angrier than anything, surprise hitting him like a baseball that had knocked him out and made his head whirl.

“Is that why we’re here? Are you stalking (y/n)?” Jimmy said accusingly, he was pointing fingers yet again, Mike just raised his brow at him.

“I’m not stalking him; he missed out breakfast date.” Mike said, explaining nothing else, he turned back to the road to watch your figure stomp towards the car. Your posture was rigid and fuming, your hand bringing the cigarette to your lips to take an angry drag before tossing it to the ground and stomping on the butt.

Jimmy watched as you practically ripped the door handle off before slamming it shut, Mike proceeded to lock the door once again. His eyes peered into the rearview mirror, you glared angrily at him, arms crossed. You fiddled with your wrist band snapping it against your skin until it turned red, you blew a slow breath through your nose to calm yourself.

The whole time Jimmy had turned himself around in the car to watch you, his eyes trained exclusively on you, silently begging for answers. You gave up glaring at Mike and turned to the expecting Jimmy, your grouchiness simmered down as soon as you saw your friend’s face.

You had a particularly soft spot for Jimmy, he was a good friend of yours and finding out he had become friends with Mike wasn’t as surprising as he thought. Jimmy was notorious for having an interesting life of not so legal activities and jobs, not to mention Mike used to work at the law department that Jimmy had been scrounging around at for a good few year when he first passed his bar exam.

“Hi, Jimmy.” You said in a tired, yet friendly voice. Your hand gently scratched your face, your stubble was itchy from shaving recently and you had started to regret it. Jimmy just stared open mouth at you before responding.

“Hey, so uh you two know each other?” he asked, shoving his thumb towards Mike, who had no even turned around to face you yet. You nodded at him, you sighed gently and brought your feet up to lounge in the back seat completely spreading out.

“Yeah, Mike and I have known each other for a long time, we do jobs together sometimes.”

“Wait, you mean like. Like, gang stuff, and sneaking around?” He asked, poor Jimmy’s head spun even more, he didn’t know anything about your double life of crime that you sometimes tagged along with on Mike’s jobs. You didn’t do anything hardcore, mostly intel and maybe scaring the pants off of people to fork up money they owed.

“Mmm, depends.” You said glancing at him and playing with the zipper on your pants pockets.

“Why didn’t you ever say anything?” Jimmy’s brow was ruffled, he almost looked hurt, like you had been keeping some big secret from him. Which, technically, you were.

“Jimmy, I didn’t even know you knew Mike. Also, I could be saying the same about you.” You gently pointed out, Jimmy just pursed his lips and shook his head.

You turned and watched him sit back into his seat and looked between Mike and you and shrugged his shoulders, he let out a small “okay…”

You just enjoyed the silence between the three of you, just sitting and listening to the commotion of the outside world. Birds chirped gently in the back ground as you tried your best to not feel the plastic of the car dig into your spine.

“So why weren’t you at breakfast.” Mike said lowly, his voice breaking the vow of silence, you let out a small sigh hearing this.

“You didn’t even send a text.” This was the first time Mike actually turned to look at you, his eye balls trying desperately to light you on fire just by looking at you. You just stared at his unforgiving frown that had twisted itself upon his face.

“I was tired, Mike. I have a job you know; sorry I didn’t text.” You said avoiding his stare, you really didn’t want to explain to him that you haven’t been getting any sleep and your depression had been that much worse. Even just answering a simple text felt like fighting a bear, it was easier just to not respond as you laid there in bed, completely apathetic to anything around you from years of struggling with major depression.

“It’s just unlike you,” He grouched, his tone shifted slightly, he didn’t seem as angry, more concerned.

“I was worried something had happened.”

“No, nothing like that. I’ve just been really tired.” You repeated, you switched to laying on your side as you stared at him. He just observed you gently, he decided against snarking at you as you let your dirty boots scuff up the inside of his car.

“Huh.” Mike huffed out, he turned around and gently grabbed the steering wheel, you heard the engine start rapidly as the car shifted drive. Your body shot up as you watched Mike start to pull away, your hands grasping the back of Mike and Jimmy’s seat as he sped past your work. The gas station quickly disappearing from sight.

“MIKE! GO BACK, I’m still on the clock!”

“Call your boss, tell him you’re taking the day off.”

“What! I can’t do that! I’ve never done that.” You exclaimed, panic gripping you. You had been working that job for years and never called in. While it was just a gas station job, it was good for intel and getting to know locals. Many people at your job were extremely chatty and willing to give it to their friendly gas station clerk for free.

“Good, then he won’t care, he’ll know it’s serious.”

Your heart just sunk, defeat fell over you as you sunk back into the back seat, you flipped your phone open and sent an emergency text message to your boss. You tried making up a good lie, you honestly felt bad about running off in the middle of the shift, but he seemed to calm down and allow you to leave. You snapped your phone shut and looked back up at Jimmy, he seemed to be giving you glances every once in a while.

“I texted, told him I had an emergency.” You said glancing out the window, you watched a few streets pass by, the location seemed familiar. Landmarks and street names filling away in your head to create a small map, you were around one of the restaurants that you and Mike frequented,

“Are we going to our restaurant?” You asked excitedly, you peered around more and tried looking for that familiar building. Jimmy seemed to be looking as well, trying to locate said place.

A small chuckle escaped Mike, “No, but we can if you want. I was gonna take you to the coffee place around here. Said you were tired, and it’s quiet and out of the way.” He said turning the wheel to enter a street you didn’t recognize.

“No, I’m fine with a coffee place, I don’t really think I can handle a lunch rush inside a restaurant anyways.” You said watching the car pull into a small area, the coffee shop was nestled in between to other places, an acupuncturist and a Chinese all you can eat buffet place.

“What about you, Jimmy? Are you okay with going to this place with us?” You said turned your attention to him, he looked a little nervous to be honest. Apparently, he was completely calm in a potentially dangerous situation, yet when it came to having lunch with friends he freaked out.

“Yeah, no, I’m fine.” He chuckled lightly, “I just wasn’t mentally prepared for a nice outing I guess?” He said, unbuckling the seatbelt. He let it slide off him before exiting the car once it was parked.

“This is better, I like spending time with you.” He said gazing around to scope out the place before landing on Mike.

“And, of course, you too! Both of you, although I’m a little more used to the domestic life around (Y/n).” He said trying to apologize to Mike, Mike just gave him a little shake of his head.

Jimmy suddenly hooked arms with you, you gave him a little smile as he marched the three of you towards the coffee shop.

“Allow me, sir.” He said to you, giving a little bow before unceremoniously ripping the door open, almost hitting Mike with the rebound in the ass.  You gave a little snort as you entered in, already making a clamor inside the quiet building, the owners immediately hearing a ruckus of customers coming to sit down at a booth.

“Jesus, you two are like giant toddlers, can’t take you anywhere.” Mike grumbled, he was used to your calm demeanor around him, but paired with Jimmy you lost all common sense and shenanigans ensued.

Chuckling gently the three of you seated yourselves and glanced over the menu, Jimmy pointing at a few things and commenting on them. You showed him your favorite flavors of drinks and he gave small nods of approval. Mike didn’t even bother looking at the menu, he just wanted his coffee black.

“Hmm, maybe I should get this one? It sounds like something a prince in England would order.” Jimmy hummed slightly, flipping through the pages again, looking at the pastry section again, eyeing their delicious treats.

“That sounds good, I think I’m gonna get the white chocolate marshmallow cappuccino.”

“Mmm, you can try mine if I try yours?” Jimmy said his brow questioningly.

“Sure,”

You were finally ready to order, a lady came by and jotted down your drinks giving a few comments and small talking with Jimmy. You just sat and listened while swinging your feet, the coffee shop wasn’t too busy, so it wasn’t so bad for you.

You bit gently at your thumb as you glanced around and tried calming down a bit, being in a new place was extremely stressful, and even more stressful was ordering from a menu that seemed to spin. Decision making just seemed that much harder, words became nothing, and stress wanted to pull you in, it was hard to concentrate slightly as you saw Jimmy was saying something to you.

“You alright, (Y/n)?” He said, hand gently on your shoulder. You felt your body snap back.

“Mm, yeah I’m just not feeling up to a whole lotta talkin’.” You said gently, you felt relief being able to actually say this to Jimmy. You were comfortable enough to let Jimmy know how you were really feeling. He allowed you enough room and was comfortable just vibing with you, and he talked plenty for the both of you.

So you did, you sat and listened to Mike and Jimmy talk about normal ordain things. A few business-y things, but mostly normal. It felt nice to finally have Mike and him around at once, who knew it would be this calming. You sipped gently on your warm coffee enjoying the sweet, rich flavor.

Jimmy also gave your coffee a small sip, his brow furrowing and almost gagging slightly.

“Ugh, how are your teeth not rotting, kid?” He teased, you just shrugged and traded your drinks to have a taste of his.

“I honestly don’t drink many sweet things, unless it’s coffee.” You murmured tipping his drink back and tasting the rich beans and milk flavoring.

“You two always share drinks?” Mike gawked at you, giving you a raised brow.

“Yeah, and sometimes I give him gum I already chewed.” You said with a large grin, Mike just scoffed and rolled his eyes at your terrible joke. You tried to disgust him as much as physically possible just to torment him.

“Yeesh, you two make me sick.”

“You love me.”

“Hmph, you wish.”

You gave Mike a pout and gently slapped his hand, a gentle smile on his face as you chuckled heartily. It was a good lunch.

[slootpoot]

Longhorn - Chapter Six

06 | Dust and Mildew Longhorn Masterlist

The room is dark and it reeks of dust and mildew. Dean is tied to a post, a sheet laid over him like a corpse. He shakes it off and blinks to adjust to the lack of light. 

“Dean?” 

“Y/N, please, God, tell me that’s you.” 

“Dean…” 

Dean immediately gets a strong sense of dread. “Y/N? Y/N, what the hell happened.” 

“He caught me,” you whisper. A sob cracks through the air. “In the alley. Stabbed me in the side, then knocked me out with a - a brick, I think.” 

“Stabbed?” he grunts, yanking at the knots. The shapeshifter was not in Boy Scouts, that’s for sure. The rope falls to the base of the beam easily. “Fuck, okay, I’m coming.” 

He scrambles in the dark to make his way to you. He finds your hands tied above your head, trapping you against a beam and the pipe you’re tied to. Blood stains your white shirt and jeans, and your hair is a knotted mess on your head. A trickle of blood travels from your temple. It’s dry, dark red and crusted onto your skin. 

“Jesus Christ.” He presses his hand against your side and you twist away, yelping. “Sorry, I’m sorry.” 

“Oddly enough,” you choke out. “Being shot feels a lot better than being stabbed.” 

He chuckles before running back to grab the sheet that previously covered him, ripping at the threads to create a makeshift gauze. 

“Damn it.”

The voice comes from farther back in the room. “Sam?” you call out. “Don’t tell me you’re that abomination.” 

Dean’s busy with your bindings when Sam answers. “Yeah, it’s me.” 

“Well,” Dean grunts, ripping the last piece of the sheet before knotting it at your side. You wince again as he starts unbinding you. “He’s not entirely stupid. He picked the hot ones.” 

He throws you a wink when you’re finally released, his hands rubbing at your shoulders to relieve the ache in your joints. 

The two of you make your way to Sam just as he releases his own rope. “He looked like you, man,” he tells Dean. “And he didn’t just look like you. He was you. Or, at least, becoming you.”

“What?” 

“He’s right,” you say, hand pressed against your side. “He looked like you when he got me. The only reason I knew it wasn’t was because, well, you stabbed me. Or - he stabbed me. It?” 

“It’s like he was downloading your thoughts and memories,” Sam says. 

“Like a weird fugly goop-leaving brain hacker,” you quip. 

“He’s going to Rebecca’s. We’ve got to hurry, he’s probably already there.”

You find a window and Dean helps you climb out of it, grabbing you under the arm and lifting you out. 

“Come on,” Sam says once you’re all out onto the street. “We gotta find a phone, call the police.” 

“Woah, woah, woah.” Dean stops walking, staring at his brother. “You’re gonna put an APB on me.” 

Sam merely shrugs. “Sorry.” 

He rolls his eyes. “Whatever. This way.” 

He grabs your arm, tucking it underneath his to help you walk. You’re pale, skin glistening in sweat. They’ve got to hurry this case up - the scene of you limping, wincing every step and your blood-stained hand pushing against your wound makes his neck tight. 

Walking past a TV store, you stop at the window. Dean has to stop with you, but Sam barely notices and keeps walking. “Sam,” you whisper. A reporter is on screen, speaking animatedly into a microphone. 

“An anonymous tip led police to a home in Central West End, where a S.W.A.T team discovered a local woman bound and gagged. Her attacker, a white male, approximately twenty-four to thirty years of age, was discovered hiding in her home.” 

A rough, grainy sketch of Dean appears on-screen. “Man!” he whines, stomping his foot childishly. “That’s not even a good picture.”

“Good enough.” Sam looks around the street, paranoid, and keeps walking. He gives you and Dean no choice but to follow. “They said attempted murder. At least we know that -” 

“I - he didn’t kill her.” 

Sam nods. “I’ll check in with Rebecca in the morning, see if she’s all right.” 

“Fine by me,” Dean says. “But first, I wanna find that handsome devil and beat his ass.” 

“We have no weapons, Dean,” you say. “No silver bullets. Nothing. The freak even took my belt.” 

Dean loved that belt. The big ass longhorn buckle’s horns double as a silver knife. Plus, he liked watching the buckle sway as you walked. 

But that’s neither here nor there. 

“Listen, Y/N. The guy’s walking around with my face, okay? It’s a little personal. I’m attached to my face. I want to find this guy.” 

“Where the hell do we look?” Sam asks. 

“The sewers?” you suggest. Even the idea of it makes your nose curl in disgust. Dean doesn’t know how to feel about you joining along, especially with the way you’re looking. But he knows better than to say anything - injured or not, you’d whoop his ass for trying to tell you what to do. 

“We still need weapons,” Sam says. 

“I’m betting money he took the car,” Dean answers. “Drove it to Rebecca’s.” 

“News says he fled on foot. It’s probably still parked there.” 

Dean frowns. “The thought of him drivin’ my car,” he grumbles. 

You sigh heavily and Sam rolls his eyes, mumbling, “All right, come on.” 

“It’s killin’ me.” 

“Let it go, Dean.”

Chapter Seven

[randum-famdoms]

Y’all. Y’ALL. I am *this* close to finishing the first draft of the chapter. Like for real there’s just one short scene left.

And I’ve been hit with the worst migrane I’ve ever had. I took some Tylenol and it’s finally kicking in, but I can’t move my head from side to side or up and down very far and earlier the right half of my vision turned reallll weird, like it wasn’t blurry exactly but it was like the fish eye lens on moviemaker plus double vision but only for my right eye. Idk it was fucking freaky. Sounds are far too loud, plus my tinnitus is a lot louder than normal, and bright lights are of the devil which isn’t very good for typing on a laptop with a bright screen. Rn I’m sitting in my bed with my blackout curtains drawn (but my room has a half circle window which I can’t cover up so it’s still like, barely dim. Hopefully it’ll get dark out before the Tylenol wears off). My analog clock is ticking and I want to throw a heavy brick at it so it shuts the fuck up.

So yeah not gonna finish that chapter today like I’d thought. Kinda pissed bout that ngl.

I know how I want this last scene to go, and it’s entirely too angsty and unplanned and not what my outline looked like but hey that’s how writing goes!

Literally the entire second half of this chapter is not what my outline looked like lol. Like fr this was supposed to be a filler fluff chapter. But nooooo the fanfic spirits demanded angst and character development instead. Idk why I expected anything else when this always happens. I am pretty proud of how it turned out though, the demon that possessed me knows what it’s doing.

On the bright side: rough draft should be done tomorrow! I’ve got a bunch of other stuff I need to do irl, so we’ll see if I can get together on FaceTime with my beta to edit it or not. If not, then hopefully she’s free the day after. Regardless, it looks like my first week of April finishing date will actually hold for once!!! All it took was two fucking months of delay, lol.

[ofmagiick]

pinned post and docs tba, but for now here's the html of the rules on my theme until i can get other admin stuff done:

laws

I.

SELECTIVITY / FOLLOWING - this is a selective blog for my sake, but honestly, if i can see us writing, i will follow back. i am mutuals only, though, and will have anxiety about sending you things if we aren’t, even if you’re cool. i'm iffy on doubles, just because i myself am very self-conscious. it’s a personal thing, chances are i thing your writing is fucking dope.

II.

CROSSOVERS / OC MUSES - two words: fuck. yeah. star wars lends itself to crossovers hella well, we can figure this shit out in a hot second. plus, the galaxy is so vast and diverse, i want to explore more of this universe, as much as i can. as for ocs, y’all brave as fuck, and i love them. just have a rules/about page, and then we’re golden

III.

RP ETIQUETTE - you know, don’t god mod, don’t randomly kill my muse (not saying you can’t, hell, please do, just im me first), don’t reblog threads you’re not a part of, don’t relog my hc posts. and have fun.

IV.

FORMATTING / ICONS - match me, don’t, dance the macarena before posting, i don’t give a fuck. i format how i want, when i want. my icons use citrus, by apocalypseresources

V.

WRITING - kind of a slow writer, and easily distracted. poke me over ims after about two weeks, if i haven’t replied before then. not super here for rape/torture, but i have an odd like for eldritch and body horror...

VI.

GRAPHICS - all graphics on my blog are made by me/for me. give credit where credit is due. be nice. making shit is a lot harder than just throwing an image into photoshop and clicking buttons. people work hard on shit, and i will come for your knees if you don’t credit people, creators, artists, etc… i have baseball bats.

VII.

SHIPPING - fuck yeah fuck yeah fuck yeah !! you come to me with a ship, and by the time i’ve finished processing the words, i’m already hella emotionally invested. crackships are my shit, so please don’t be scared. honestly, i’ll ship pretty much anything. probably even some sketchy shit by other’s standards. if that’s a problem, hasta la vista, and sorry i don’t cut it for you.

VIII.

NSFW - i and my muse are 18+, my nsfw tag is literally ‘a girl’s got needs,’ let’s fuckin’ do this. i’ll write it, but not with minors. other, general nsfw topics might come up, due to the nature of AUs and canon events. i do try and tag as cw // or cw ment //, so please feel free to tell me things you need tagged.

IX.

PLOTTING - do it. done. if i don’t write down whatever idea i have quick enough, it will get yeeted from my head like a brick out the window fuckin adhd, so (with express permission from you) i’ll message at bizarre hours, probably. on the flip side, this is your express permission: i, lily, mun of ofmagiick, give you, [name], mun of [blog], permission to send me ims/ask with plot proposals. it’s signed and sealed as soon as you read this. no take-backsies. you gotta, now. :3c

X.

MEMES - headcanon/ask my muse questions/etc, open to all. interaction-oriented, mutuals only. no reblog karma, but if you aren’t sending me something, reblog from the source, please

XI.

ACTIVITY - it can be spotty. i’m a full-time student, adhd mess. hit me up in ims with reminders or ping me on disco/in a server, its all cool.

XII.

MAINS / EXCLUSIVES - i'm okay with mains, you'll be my go-to version of a character, and the one i'm thinking of if mine mentions yours to someone else, but that's gonna be discussed beforehand. exclusives will have to be heavily, HEAVILY discussed, and likely will be way down the line if ever.

XIII.

CALLOUTS - bitch, no. get that shit away from me. won’t post ‘em, won’t reblog ‘em. call me out if you want, i’ll screenshot it, print it out, and put it up on my wall to laugh at, and remember people are still wasting brainpower to be mad at me. if you have an issue with me, hit me up in ims/off anon, and we can talk like adults.

???

ABOUT THE MUN - what up it’s ya nerd lily with newest brainrot, this time sci-fi. pronouns are she/her or “hey you ditz”, i am legal to drink in the us and far beyond legal adult there, and i id as a goddamned fucking mess mutuals feel free to hmu for discord if you want it