#i’m being dragged back into this fandom because of this stupid ship

[nashdoesstuff]

they’re in love your honor

killer belongs to rahafwabas shattered!dream belongs to galacii

[pspsps @largefound-the-sequel, @justanidiotartist, any others?]

[herefortheships]

Here it is! My first fanfic in over TEN years! This fic is for today's Destiel fandom event Electric Boogaloo, hosted by @blanketforcas in celebration of the anniversary of the Latam dub giving us canon reciprocal Destiel.

The theme of the event is reciprocation, and that is the theme of my little fic. I hope you like it!

(I wanted to also share this to AO3 and contribute to the over 100,000 Destiel fanworks, but I haven't gotten my invitation yet! So this will go over there eventually.)

Word count: 1,778 words

No warnings of any kind. I think it's a sweet kind of story.

Short summary: Dean sits down to write a letter for Cas with all the things he didn't get to say.

Felicidades a Dean y Castiel en este aniversario. Siempre quiero recordar la alegría (y el DOLOR de ALMA lol) que estos dos me han dado desde el 2012 hasta el día de hoy. Los amo. 😊✨

(Congratulations to Dean and Castiel in this anniversary. I always wat to remember the joy (and the PAIN of my SOUL lol) these two have given me since 2012 until today. I love them. 😊)

💚💙💚💙💚💙💚💙💚💙💚💙💚💙💚💙💚💙

The words he never said

A short fic by Here for the Ships (Des 💚)

Dean Winchester sat at his desk with nothing but a pencil, a sheet of paper, and a bottle of booze. Sam was out in an early morning run with the dog, so Dean was alone with some time to kill and some thoughts to finally drag out of his head and smother away with this one sheet of paper. It had been over two months, now, since he had been forced to part ways with Cas; since his entire world had been turned inside-out and upside-down.

He wasn’t sure if he had processed everything; from the loss of Cas, to defeating Chuck (aka the God), to living in a world where his new God had been a surrogate son to him only a couple of months ago.

The events of those days played often in his mind, when he found himself alone; they paraded in his dreams as he tried to sleep at night… The grief of what was lost had become a constant companion, peering through any moment of peace in the most unexpected ways. A song suddenly playing in the radio, a scent attached to a moment he would never get back.

Dean had considered taking it on as his one mission in life, hunting down the Empty and getting Cas back. But no. He had learned it well and deep by now, that revenge never resulted in anything good. Plus, he’d had enough of dealing with supernatural beings with ineffable, omnipotent powers. Chuck was the final Big Fish he took down, and he was good with that.

Dean took a look at the bottle of room-temperature beer for a few seconds, and he pushed it back on his desk instead of taking a sip this time. It’d hurt, but these words needed to be said. Or at least, he needed them out of his head and stored somewhere else.

“Well, Cas… These are the things I never said…” he said to himself, picked up the pencil, and got to writing:

Last night I prayed to Jack, again… And Cas, buddy, you know how much I hate having to do that. But I had to. You know, I thought I had accepted it, that I was over it. You did what you had to do, and I did what I had to do… We were all doing what we thought was right. But it just keeps playing over and over, and over in my head.

Cas, what the hell were you thinking? I’m not one for judging… I’ve done my share of stupid things, too. For love, for not wanting to be left alone… But Cas, how could you do this to me? I know it sounds fucking selfish, because you’re gone, and because of that we’re all safe and your sacrifice wasn’t it vain—it was never in vain, I really hope you know that. But Cas, now I have to live knowing that you’re gone because you loved me. You loved me. You said all those things about me, I can scarcely remember all of it (trust me, I’m kicking myself about it every freaking day), but I can feel it, everything. I can feel every damned word, every damned day.

Just so you know, because of you… Because of you I could see more in me. Because of you I could see myself differently than I ever did before. Man, I wish I wasn’t so bad with this… That I could put into words just what that all meant to me, what it means to me.

You said all those things about me, and I didn’t get to say anything. And yeah, just like I’ve prayed to you, hoping you could hear what I had to say, I’ve also prayed to Jack. I’ve prayed almost every single night for him to get you out of that place; for him to set things right… But I haven’t heard a word from Jack, and I haven’t seen a flutter of angel wings anywhere; nothing to connect me to Heaven, nothing to give me a clue on what to do….

Every night, the scene of your death plays inside my head, like a freaking movie I can’t look away from no matter how much I want. And in my head, I always stop it from happening. In my head we face the Empty together and we win. We always win.

Dean stopped for a moment, gathering his thoughts, wondering if writing this would be enough.

I think I took it for granted, that we always win. I think at some point I felt invincible. You know, you and me, and Sam, we’ve taken some pretty Big Fish. I think something inside me always felt like we’d always win, that we’d always come back to the bunker together and share some beers. I think something inside me always believed that, even though I didn’t fully realize it. Looking back now, I see it. Cas, when you said those words to me, I froze. And it took me a while, you know? To understand what really happened. That I was your happiness.

“No, I don’t think I should put it like that…”

That I was your happiness. That just letting me know how you felt about me was enough to make you truly happy. Enough to make the Empty come and take you. But Cas, now I have to live with that knowledge and it’s driving me fucking crazy, because… Alright, I’m not good with words, and I’m sure by now you know that about me, Cas, but I just wanted you to know, I needed you to know

Dean sat back and sighed a long sigh, staring at the page like it was staring right back at him, somehow shaming him, even though there was no one here to read over his shoulder. “I can’t even write the motherfukin’ words.”

There was no time to finish this now, anyway. He’d heard the door a few minutes ago: Sam was back, and he should be in the shower now. There was a case they were driving up to today, and he’d already made up his mind: it would be his last. He was officially retiring after today (not that he’d told Sam anything about that yet, but… he’d figure out how to say it on the way back).

They were supposed to leave after breakfast for a whole day of driving.

Chuck was defeated and Jack had vanished, having become the new God (that was still crazy to think about). There were no immediate world-ending threats and no more infinitely powerful surrogate son to take care of anymore. He was done hunting. If Cas was truly gone forever, then he’d honor his sacrifice by living the best possible life he could live. And that life, however he looked at it… That life didn’t include hunting. Not anymore.

Dean sat down to tie his boots, and as he did, a second pair of boots appeared right in front of him. “Man, that was fast. I didn’t even hear the damned door just now. You’re gonna have to give me a break, Sammy.” But when he raised his gaze, he found himself looking at Jack, standing there with a small smile.

The color drained out of Dean’s face. For a moment, he could only stare at Jack, wondering if he was imagining it.

“Hello, Dean. You’ve been okay?” Jack said, sounding a little timid, to which Dean replied, “Yeah… I’m fine, no thanks to you… Almost gave this old man a heart attack…” Dean joked, a little breathless, and God or not, this was Jack, so he pulled him into a hug. “Come here. How’ve you been? It’s so good to see you…”

“I’ve been good,” Jack said, and he pulled away. “There’s someone else who’s been wanting to see you." Jack beamed. "Believe me, it took me a while to negotiate (you won’t be surprised to know, not even God is entirely all powerful), but I finally did it…”

And that was when Dean felt it, the powerful presence behind him.

He could do nothing but stand there as the realization of what Jack meant dawned on him, until the words broke him out of the spell, “Hello, Dean.”

Dean turned around, and there he saw…

“Cas…”

Castiel was standing there, right in front of his bed. He was fully restored; Dean didn’t need to see a shadow of his wings to know this was Cas in his full angelic power, safe and alive and standing right there in his bedroom. “But… how?”

“We heard your prayers,” Jack said, “and Cas didn’t belong in the Empty. I had to right a wrong.”

“You damn well had to…” said Dean, still staring at Cas. “Jack…” He finally turned back to thank him—to say anything—but Jack was gone.

“Dean… I’m so sorry…” Cas said. “I should’ve—”

“What are you talking about, man… You’re back… That’s all that matters.”

“I owe it all to Jack. He is everything I hoped he would become,” Cas said, and he smiled.

And then, there was silence. Even though Dean had been writing a long letter just moments ago, full of all the things he wished he could have said to Cas that day, here was Cas in the flesh right now—his Cas—and not a single word would form.

So Dean just pulled Cas into a hug and squeezed him tight, breathing him in.

“I’m sorry it all happened so abruptly; I wish I could—” Cas started.

“I don’t care. Cas… I don’t care.” Dean pulled back from the hug, staring Cas straight in the face with his hands still on his arms. “All I care is that you’re here.”

Cas looked sad, or perhaps, conflicted. “Dean… I know… What I said before…” he started, but Dean stopped him again.

“Cas… If you heard me just now… If you’ve heard my prayers, to you, to Jack… Then you know. But still… I feel like I should say something.”

“Dean… You really don’t have to—”

“But I’m not good at saying something, so…” he pulled Cas into a kiss. It was warm and tender, and salty with the tears that had finally pushed their way out. Cas kissed him right back, and when they stopped, they stood there sharing each other’s breath, with their lips just an inch away from another kiss.

“I think that should be enough of an answer… But if it wasn’t, Cas…” Dean smiled, a small, trembling smile, and it was almost a whisper when he said, “I love you, too.”

[tomsdonutdealer]

Jaiden kinda sucks.

I’m making a post about this from the pure fact nobody seems to be talking about it, and while I’ll try to take an open standpoint this is entirely my opinion.

The categories:

Aiden (S2 overview)

James (S2 overview)

Jaiden in AS and S2

Let’s begin

SEASON 2: AIDEN

Where do I even begin on how dirty Aiden was done this season. He’s seen to be a kindhearted, slightly stubborn, twinkish guy who’s quick to form a grudge against James, but he’s compassionate enough to suddenly hop into Lake’s storyline to tell her that her parents are fucked (I don’t know why they had Aiden do this frankly, any character could’ve).

This post isn’t about how awful his writing is, but for a character that’s supposed to be kind and friendly, he’s around James way too much. All of his most memorable scenes are him being pissy at James, and out of context that victimises James WAY too much. James is way too glorified in the overall Jaiden plot.

SEASON 2: JAMES

I’ve already said it, but I’ll happily say it again. James is way too victimised in Season 2. He’s in general just an awful person, who’s development was rushed and purely for the sake of yaoi. Way to go, DC writing team, you made another ship into fetish content.

I’ll properly go through my main and infamous problem with him in the Jaiden section, but holy shit this man is insufferable, they were way too desperate to give him himbo energy.

I think the fandom can be blatantly misogynistic with who they call murderer on this season. Riya attempted murder, so did Yul, and James was the closest one to succeeding! If you call Yul an attempted murderer, James is just as, if not even more guilty. He took part in the plan against Aiden, mind you. He only seems like a hero because in the end he attempts to murder someone else. I hate Yul as much as the next Gabby or Grett fan, but yikes, the fandom got over that much too fast.

Season 2: Jaiden

Holy shit, there’s so much to cover. I think we may as well start with the most infamous scene that fuels both my James and Jaiden hate, and if it wasn’t obvious by now…

If the video doesn’t speak paragraphs for itself, this is blatant sexual assault. Sexual assault James gets no reprimanding for. It was another scene where they’re trying to present Aiden as an innocent twink who gets mad at James over small things, but frankly that was an underreaction, Aiden has balls to not drag his ass..

The first kiss wasn’t sexual assault, Aiden consented to the bare minimum. James pulling Aiden back in when he physically resisted IS sexual assault. I see a LOT of James fans (a certain youtuber who had controversy on X before proceeding to apologise then not change the slightest bit) try and excuse this with ‘Oh, the person who wrote it is weird!!’ or ‘Ah, let’s just pretend it doesn’t exist because it’s weird!’ While they’re not wrong, since presumably Carazar Zone wrote the kiss challenge in, the scene exists. The scene is canon, and you’re ignoring and defending sexual assault. You’re the Melaine fans of the DC fandom I fear..

The rest of the season goes relatively the same, James gets Aiden to forgive him, James fucks up, Aiden gets mad, and the cycle repeats. This is the most stupid trope to ever exist, no wonder Season 2 gets so much shit. With this cycle, really they shouldn’t of gotten together by the end of Season 2. That’s a setup for a disgustingly unhealthy relationship. Fuck this season, fuck Jaiden, fuck that bitchass motherfucker James🔥😭

ALL STARS: JAIDEN

In all honesty, this season would’ve been way more interesting if Aiden still had his brain from early S2 so he didn’t get with James and was still fucking mad at him, meanwhile TomJake was the side yaoi relationship that’s going impossibly well for how repeated the dynamic was.

Not only would Aiden have a justified reason to be mad at James (sexual assault, joining an attempted murder plan, using him for followers multiple times, etc), but it would make sense for James to be a first boot if no one there fucking liked him. Even then, if you move around the placements in all the seasons so James has Tom’s AS elimination spot and Aiden has Jake’s, it’d still be much more watchable, since they have reason to hold a grudge.

I love Tom, I love his autism coded, I fucking hate his child design but I forgive him, but it was never actually explained on why he didn’t at least send a dry ‘ok’ to Jake. Jake however, I will defend until I’m buried in the fucking pits of hell, that man has BPD, and that man had completely justified reactions because of that. I fucking love and hate both of them, they didn’t need that much focus.

Obviously the writing team didn’t do this, so we’re stuck with the reality of them being a happy and presumably healthy couple. I love All Stars Jaiden, a lot. I hate Jaiden in the context that Season 2 is canon and not just a bad dream. If Jaiden was just an out of the pocket ship they introduced in the first episode of All Stars, similar to YulGrett, I’d be all for it, because holy shit their colour palettes compliment each other, but they weren’t, we digress I suppose.

hope you enjoyed my little rant

[tsarisfanfiction]

Hide and Seek

Fandom: Trials of Apollo Rating: Teen Genre: Family Characters: Michael, Apollo, Piper, Meg, Jason Michael wasn't expecting to stumble across his mortal father in his latest escape attempt. Now if only his dad would do the sensible thing and get off the floating villa Michael's been trying to escape for the past two years. TOApril day 24 - Unexpected Allies. This is a spin-off AU from mine and @stereden's fic A Single Drachma, where instead of his escape from Caligula meaning he missed the TBM drama of canon... well. This happened. I may or may not tackle this AU properly later on, but for now here's a pilot of what could be. There are characters I've not written much if at all before in here, so please bear with any oocness that may have occurred as I start to get to grips with them.

Michael didn’t know what he’d expected, but it wasn’t this.

More fucking big eared furry menaces hounding him with the bows that he just wished he could get his hands on?  He’d rather not because they meant trouble, but they were a possibility.

Brainwashed humans and stupid cyclopes working together to pin him down and drag him back to his dressed-up fucking prison?  Second most likely, and preferred out of the two – even without a weapon he had a chance of wriggling past them.

The horse?  Fuck off, but also a known quantity.  Same for the deluded creepy freak that called himself an emperor-god and kept telling Michael he was going to replace Apollo.  If he never saw either of them again it would be too fucking soon, but so far his luck hadn’t been that good.

It hadn’t been good at all.  If it was, he wouldn’t have been stuck on these fucking boats for the past two years.  Michael was very, very sick of water everywhere he looked.  There was land around them at the moment, some bay or other, although he had no idea which one.  He didn’t care, either, as long as he could finally get away, and there had been enough noise going on that something was happening, and he had another chance to slip away – if he could get onto one of those landing boats unnoticed.

Then the lightning had struck the boat he was on, blowing apart enough of it that the freaky sound-proofing that Michael hated so much cracked open and the noise of fighting was right there.

Lightning.  Striking a boat.

Michael had been a demigod long enough to know that lightning didn’t just strike for no reason.

He shrunk back into the shadows as more of the freak’s goons – one of them a cyclops – ran towards the broken cabin and yanked open the door with enough force that it almost came off its hinges.  The freak was not going to be happy about the destruction of one of his precious boats, and Michael almost wished he could see his reaction.

Almost.

He still wanted to get the fuck away more.

Then the freak’s goons dropped dead, and Michael saw opportunity.  He hated to admit it, but with two years’ worth of failed escape attempts, it was pretty damning evidence that he wasn’t going to get away without some help.  It was either going to save or damn him, but he needed to know if there were more anti-freaks on the ship – if there were, he was joining their fucking party no matter what they said.

Michael stayed low as he nudged the door open, pushing it without actually standing in the doorway, because he’d seen how fast those idiots had dropped and wasn’t going to get himself killed by being like them.

Gold weapons flashed out at the empty space, lower than he’d anticipated – a shorter warrior than he’d accounted for – and proved his paranoia right.

“I’m not with those bastards,” he said, keeping his voice low – because sound travelled on the water and the freak might be several boats over but that didn’t make him necessarily out of earshot – but clear.  He was well aware his outfit didn’t help matters, with the stupid white-and-blue sailor crap the freak loved so much, but that wasn’t his fucking choice, either.  Still, he poked his head cautiously around the doorframe, keeping a hand raised where whoever was in there could see it.

It was a bad fucking idea, he knew it was, but two years was enough to make him more than a little bit fucking desperate, okay?

There were four of them in there – closest to the door, with those dangerous-looking twin golden blades, was a black haired girl about his height, and probably a similar age to Kayla (if Kayla hadn’t fallen, and no, Michael wasn’t going to think about seeing his youngest sister fall from the fucking bridge right now).  The other teenagers were all a couple of years younger than him, maybe Will’s age or a bit older, but they had the clear air of demigods, and Michael hadn’t seen any of those in two years.

Demigods on a quest, even if there was too many of them, technically.  If the kid was part of it.

She certainly gripped her weapons like she knew how to use them.

“Michael?”

It was his name, soft and broken and unexpected, and it came from the curly haired brown boy clutching an arrow in his hands.

“You know this guy?” the older girl asked, and the other boy – this one blond – peered at him from behind his glasses in a way that looked distinctly Athena-kid-like, except for the bright blue eyes.

“I- yes,” Curly said, sounding like he’d seen a fucking ghost, and Michael scowled at him.  He didn’t recognise him at all – he hadn’t been a camper two years ago, none of them had been, Michael didn’t recognise any of them.  Not the unruly brown curls, not the nasty case of acne, not his voice or even the bow that he used.

Then he made eye contact.

He’d heard the saying ‘eyes are the window to the soul’ many times, but he’d always dismissed it at romanticised bullshit.  Eyes were eyes and they came in many colours and shapes and emotions, but the idea of them being more had never settled well with him.

Curly’s eyes were an unfamiliar blue, but there was something in them that was familiar, that made Michael unwillingly think of camp, of his siblings, of dreams and sun-warmth.  Of all the things he’d missed for the past two years, wrapped up into one condensed thing.

“Dad?” he asked, and it was stupid, Apollo wouldn’t be fucking here, except-

Except it was, wasn’t it?

Fuck.

“Michael!”  The arrow dropped to the ground, and Curly – Apollo, really, what the actual fuck, what had taken him so fucking long and Michael wasn’t stupid, Apollo hadn’t expected to see him – grabbed him in a desperate embrace.

“How many do you have?” the younger girl asked, but she wasn’t threatening Michael with her swords so he was going to take that.  She went unanswered as Apollo started crying into Michael’s shoulder, blubbing things about you’re alive that Michael immediately decided to shut up in a box and not acknowledge until after he was off the fucking floating villa once and for all.

With his dad there, it seemed a lot more possible, even if there was something really weird about him.

“What the fuck is going on?” Michael demanded, intentionally cutting off Apollo’s words.

“That’s what I want to know,” the older girl said, and Michael could see the way her eyes were inspecting his clothes with suspicion.  “So tell me why you’re here.”

Her voice gained a sort of double-layer, subtle enough that Michael knew most people couldn’t hear it, let alone ignore it, but he wasn’t most people.  Drew had bitched about it often enough.

“You’re an Aphrodite kid,” he deducted, pointedly not answering the Charmspeak-layered question.  That would tell her what she needed to know, would stop her wasting her power-

Except she was looking at him with even more open suspicion now, and so was the so far silent blond boy behind her.  Seriously?

“Answer my question,” she said, and the Charmspeak was less subtle and more like a hammer against his ears.

Idiot.  How had Drew or Silena let her out on a quest like that?

He shut down the unwelcome thought that maybe they hadn’t been there to teach her.

“When you stop trying to fucking Charmspeak me,” he growled.  “Apollo, why the fuck are you like this?”  He gestured as best he could whilst trapped by his dad’s arms at the whole not-pretty teenager thing.  He’d never seen Apollo look so not-perfect in his life.

“He’s mortal,” the younger girl – and really, Michael could do with some fucking names, he was going to call her Sword Girl until he got a better one – shrugged, although there was nothing carefree about the action.

That… that was another can of fucking worms that Michael did not want to deal with right then.  His immortal god of a father suddenly mortal.  Great.

Wait.  Fuck.  Was this what the freak meant when he said he was going to replace Apollo?  Fuck, no, Michael was not letting that happen.

“You need to get the fuck off this boat,” he snapped.  “Now.  Why the fuck are you even here, anyway?”

“To steal Caligula’s shoes,” Sword Girl said bluntly.  She was rapidly becoming Michael’s favourite for actually answering his questions with recognisable answers.  Even if they were stupid ones.

“Why?” he despaired.  “What is worth risking your whole damn fucking existence for a pair of fucking shoes?  Or a boat of them?”

“How do you know about that?” Charmspeak Girl demanded (he would have called her Charmspeak Bitch, except Drew was a difficult one to topple from her bitch queen throne), her voice still laced with the fucking useless power.

He fixed her with a glare.  “Stop with the fucking Charmspeak.  It doesn’t fucking work on me, and even if it did it’s not a fucking interrogation power.”

“What do you mean?” formerly Silent-Blond asked, finally inserting himself into the conversation.  Charmspeak Girl looked just as confused, if also frustrated, and Michael realised she really didn’t have a fucking clue.

She was working with his dad, and Michael wasn’t one for dead demigods, either.  Fuck, he was not qualified to teach Aphrodite kids about their own powers, dammit.  Still, he had to say something.

“Charmspeak is based on attraction,” he told her, elbowing his dad in the process because forget Drew and Silena, why hadn’t Apollo thought to explain this shit to her?  “You persuade people that are fucking attracted to you that they want to do whatever the fuck you want.  Works for direct orders.  Doesn’t work for getting the truth out of people when they’re busy saying whatever the fuck they think you want to hear.  Stop relying on the fucking thing, it’s unreliable at best.”

Charmspeak Girl looked like he’d just told her the sky was fucking green.  Duty done, Michael ignored her and turned back to his dad.

“You need to get the fuck off this villa,” he repeated.  “Which of these idiots is your master?” because Michael had been a camper for seven fucking years, he knew the stories.  Every damn time his dad got turned mortal, he got given a demigod master.  Silent-Blond and Charmspeak Girl stared at him like he’d said something unreasonable, while Sword Girl puffed her chest out.

“Me, duh.”

Huh.  Well, at least it wasn’t Charmspeak Girl.

“Get him the fuck away from this villa,” he told her.  “This isn’t fucking worth-”

“There’s a prophecy,” Apollo said, finally talking again.  “We need those shoes, to beat him.”

Well, fuck.

Michael would love to see the freak defeated.  Right now, more than most other fucking things, but he wasn’t letting Apollo get destroyed in the process, which was what was going to happen if his idiot of a currently-mortal dad kept trying to scout across the boats until he stumbled across the right one, and then the right pair of shoes.

No fucking way.

Fuck.

“What fucking shoes?” he demanded, finally pushing Apollo off of him.  Mortal or not, Apollo was still the god of prophecy.  If he was saying shit like that, then Michael couldn’t just tell him to fuck off and ignore it.

“Caligula’s namesake,” Silent Blond finally spoke, still assessing him with those too-sharp, too-bright blue eyes.  Michael still couldn’t shake the feeling that he wasn’t quite an Athena kid, but didn’t have a clue what other options were on the table.  “His childhood shoes.”

Michael sighed and nodded.  “Get the fuck off of this thing,” he told them.  “You don’t stand a fucking chance.”

They bristled, all four of them, and Michael got it, at least from the three demigods.  Of fucking course they didn’t trust him.  Apollo’s reaction hurt a little more, but Michael forced himself to ignore it.  The arrow at his foot caught his attention and he bent down, picking it up and shoving the shaft against his dad’s chest, not entirely certain why except it was an arrow and Michael had always been an archer.

Apollo’s eyes got so wide it would have been funny if Michael wasn’t currently trying to save his dad’s fucking existence.

“Go,” he snarled.  “If you want to be fucking helpful, get one of those fucking landing boats over to ship forty three.”

“And what are you going to do?”  She’d finally dropped the Charmspeak, but her voice was still sharp without it.

Michael scoffed.  “I’m going to go get your fucking shoes.  Now fuck off.”

He didn’t wait for them to respond, ducking back out of the ruined cabin and slipping back into the shadows.

Time to put the last two years of playing hide and seek with the freak’s fucking goons to good use.

----

Okay I don't usually put A/Ns at the end of fics on tumblr, but at this point I want to clarify the Charmspeak thing, because Charmspeak is a power that can very easily go squick so I've spent some time trying to make it not so awful - specifically the implication that every middle-aged adult that Piper charmspeaks is Attracted to a sixteen year old girl. So, the premise I've worked on is that Charmspeak works on by drawing on either attraction (as in somebody already actively attracted either romantically or physically to the Charmspeaker), or for more powerful Charmspeakers like Piper, the potential for attraction (e.g. if a man is straight or bi/attracted to women, then even though he's an upstanding individual who would never dream of being attracted to a teenage girl, because the only thing that skews her out of his demographic is her age, the Charmspeak is still enough to bring them under control despite the lack of active attraction). This also extends to the additional worldbuilding whereby people with no potential for attraction - don't swing that way, or in the case of Michael in all my fics, are both very much aroace and also have no inclination to seek that sort of company anyway - can't be Charmspoken, even by someone as powerful as Piper.

[maul-of-shame]

Thank you for being the kind and savage queen we deserve, making your points clear and staying respectful when people are being downright stupid and awful 😂😂🙏 AND ALSO FOR YOUR PUNS!

Ahh, thank you, dearest bard of compliments! 🥰 I’m merely wielding the sword of reason and the shield of sass, cutting through nonsense like Frodo through Shelob’s web. And the puns? They’re my lembas bread—a never-ending supply of nourishment for these fandom skirmishes!!!🍞✨

Now, let me climb to the top of Orthanc and shout it again for those in the back:

[TW: Long salty rants are back], I'm being a mean girl XD

HALADRIELS ARE NOT THE MAIN AUDIENCE/TARGET BABE!!!

Not the Ringbearer of fandom, not the Flame of Arnor leading the charge, no matter how many times they throw around their “canon supremacy” like Saruman tossing fireballs. Seriously, some of these metas are so wild they’d make Radagast’s rabbit sled seem downright sensible 😂

Listen, I don’t care if someone ships Haladriel, Elrondriel, Adariel, or a random Ent with Treebeard’s cousin twice removed.

We’re here to celebrate creativity, not treat Middle-earth like a chessboard where only certain pieces get to move. Meanwhile, I’m seeing some of these “super serious” takes and laughing so hard I might just fall into Mount Doom. Like, babes, Galadriel isn’t holding weekly ship leader elections at Caras Galadhon. Calm down!

If your “meta” is less about character depth and more about trying to discredit every other ship, that’s not a meta—that’s Gollum clutching the ring and screaming, “MY PRECIOUS!”

You’re not Frodo bravely carrying the story to Mordor; you’re just stomping on everyone else’s picnic in the Shire.

The hypocrisy truly shines brighter than the Phial of Galadriel, doesn’t it? Like, one moment they’re screaming “SAURON!” at Elrond in their we swear we’re not panicking voices when he and Galadriel share a moment of connection. But the next? When it’s actually Elrond—our beloved half-elven scholar, diplomat, and husband material—they’re scrambling to reframe it as the weirdest crossover episode of "How I Met Your Mother: Rivendell Edition".

Pick a narrative, my friends! You can’t claim “romantic tension” when it’s one version of Elrond and then handwave it away when it’s the actual canon one. The mental gymnastics are more intense than Legolas's shield-surfing at Helm’s Deep, like I'm this close to call the Olympics Committee!!!!🛡️🏄‍♂️

And oh, the reposting and dirty deleting! “We’re not worried,” they claim, while furiously sharing screenshots, twisting posts, and erasing their own words faster than Bilbo slipping on the One Ring at his birthday party. If they’re not worried, why does it feel like they’ve made twisting narratives into a full-time job? Why do some of their shippers refuse to come out to talk? Why do people leave this ship if it's so great?

At this rate, we should all be sitting around with dwarvish ale, braiding beards, and awarding medals for the most creative reinterpretations of reality. (Spoiler: their side wins every time, because the contortions are award-worthy.)

Let’s be real, though: the “Sauron theory” gang recognizing the romantic vibe in the wrong character context says more than they realize. If you can see the connection in one interpretation, then the foundations for Elrond and Galadriel are there—plain as day, canonically grounded, emotionally resonant. But no, when it’s Elrond!Elrond, it suddenly transforms into a weirdly sterile dynamic where Galadriel’s entire existence as a complex, independent character is diminished into a platonic “guidance counselor” role.

Sorry, not buying it luv.

Tolkien didn’t write her as a warrior, ruler, and legend for her to just pat Elrond on the head and say, “There, there.”

And really, if the Elrondriel dynamic wasn’t hitting nerves, why do they keep circling back like Gollum sniffing out the Ring?

The constant “oh, we don’t care” while simultaneously writing essays, reposting clips, and dragging their feet through every mention of it feels a bit… contradictory, don’t you think?

Methinks the Galadriel doth connect too much for their comfort.

I love being called delusional with a side of "tinfoil hat enthusiast" by the same people who are practically wrapped head-to-toe in more foil than Bilbo's jacket potatoes at Sunday lunch with Miss Proudfoot.

Also now it’s Amazon’s fault? Apparently?

The big, bad oh so mean corporation “misled” you with their marketing? Let me tell you, if you’re so determined to wrap yourself in victimhood like a jacket potato, don’t worry—I’ll roast you like one, season it with a pinch of reality, and serve it with a side of common sense.🥔🔥

First of all, marketing isn’t a legally binding contract—it’s an invitation to watch, not a signed scroll from Elrond guaranteeing that every frame will cater to your personal wishlist. If you went in expecting Rings of Power to revolve solely around your ship or character, that’s not Amazon misleading you; that’s just you setting yourself up for disappointment.

Sorry, but that’s on you, not Jeff Bezos.

They keep crying about being “tricked,” as if someone put a Ring of Power on their finger and whispered sweet nothings about eternal canon validation.

Let me break it down for you: trailers highlight general themes to draw in a wide audience. Did they focus on Galadriel because she’s a main character? Yes. Did they show snippets of her with Halbrand? Of course—they’re pivotal to the plot.

But if you seriously thought that meant Amazon was promising you a 10-hour epic romance, that’s on the same level of delusion as Sauron thinking the elves wouldn’t catch onto his whole “evil overlord in disguise” schtick.

Also, can we talk about how this crowd seems to forget the entirety of Middle-earth was marketed? They act like the show’s promo team hand-delivered them engraved invitations that read: “Come one, come all! Witness the Ultimate OTP™ take over Arda!”

Meanwhile, the rest of us saw a sprawling fantasy series with elves, dwarves, harfoots, Númenor, and yes, multiple storylines. It’s like complaining that your lembas bread didn’t taste like cheesecake—if that’s what you wanted, you should’ve set your expectations accordingly babe.

And then there’s the sheer audacity of blaming Amazon for “misleading” them, all while they’re out here twisting narratives more aggressively than a dwarf braiding his beard for a royal feast. They repost clips, cut out context, dirty delete their bad takes, and then turn around screaming about being the true arbiters of Tolkien’s vision.

Newsflash: no one made you stake your entire fandom experience on your headcanon/ship coming true.

Oh, and while we’re roasting potatoes: if you’ve been online long enough to write essays on why Amazon “betrayed” you but haven’t figured out that marketing is a tool to bring people in, not to promise you the moon and stars—or your ship—you might want to take a long look in the Mirror of Galadriel.

What you’ll see? A fandom experience soured not by Amazon or Galadriel, but by your own inability to let others enjoy things.

Let’s be clear: if I’m rocking a tinfoil accessory, then they’re practically headlining a Rivendell fashion week with full tin-clad armor and matching helmets. 😂

These folks love to throw stones from their glass hobbit-holes while ignoring the fact that their own “theories” are more far-fetched than Sam actually finishing his stew without Gollum sneaking in to ruin it. Seriously, the insecurity is louder than a drunken dwarf at a Mirkwood banquet, and it’s honestly starting to feel less like a fandom and more like an orcish war chant over a ship they swear they’re “not bothered” by.

Also, shippers? We don’t owe them a single lembas crumb.

Not a theory, not an explanation, not even a single line of fanfic.

There is NO ship leader. Point blank period, no tea, full shade.

Fandoms are about creativity and enjoyment, not about bending over backwards to meet the approval of self-proclaimed “lore protectors” who seem to think Tolkien himself whispered in their ears like some Elvish Oracle, granting them sole dominion over Middle-earth.

Spoiler alert: they’re not the leaders of this fandom—they’re just the loudest voices in the tavern, trying to drown out the fact that they’re losing the argument and everyone is getting tired of them. I sure as hell know I am!

Their arguments? Flimsier than Saruman’s trustworthiness.

Their grasp on canon? Selective, like Smaug’s treasure hoard—only picking out the shiny bits that serve their narrative while ignoring the mountains of context they don’t like.

And their constant cries of “But it’s not canon!” every time someone ships anything that isn’t stamped with their personal seal of approval? Honestly, it’s giving Gollum hoarding the Ring while hissing at Frodo and Sam for daring to even exist.

They shout, “Look! It’s in the marketing! That means it’s valid, it’s canon, it’s the chosen one!” And now, when reality didn’t serve their OTP on a golden Númenórean platter, it’s suddenly, “Amazon deceived us! The marketing was a betrayal! Booooo!”

The mental gymnastics are so intense, I’m worried they’ll pull a hamstring.

Honestly, if these folks switch their opinions as often as they seem to switch their socks, their laundry baskets must be crying for help. One day, they’re clutching at promotional material like it’s the scroll of Isildur, proclaiming their ship as the true king. The next, they’re tossing that same marketing under the wheels of the nearest oliphaunt, screaming that it was all a trick.

Pick a lane, Frodo!! Because the rest of us are getting whiplash watching you hop back and forth!!

If y’all are going to parade around like the scholars of Gondor, wielding ancient scrolls and waving your metaphorical quills like you’re the Keepers of the Red Book of Westmarch, then please—I beg you—do some actual research before spewing nonsense. It’s not just embarrassing for you; it’s exhausting for everyone else who has to endure your fearmongering attempts to scare and confuse shippers while you cultivate this bizarre culture of unease, like a Saruman wannabe muttering about “the end of fandom days.”

First off, real scholarship involves understanding nuance, context, and history. You know, things Tolkien himself deeply valued. The man didn’t just slap a bunch of Elvish names together and call it a day; he built entire histories, languages, and cultures with careful thought. If you want to act like you’re following in his footsteps, maybe start by putting as much effort into your fandom arguments as he did into Middle-earth.

But no, instead of diving into actual research, some of you would rather scare your fellow shippers with The Doom of Mandos™ every time a ship you don’t like gets attention. You twist quotes, butcher context, and turn headcanons into supposed gospel truth. You’re not preserving Tolkien’s legacy; you’re just handing out fake lore like Wormtongue whispering poison into Théoden’s ear.

And honestly? It’s tiring.

What’s worse is how some of you weaponize this pseudo-intellectualism to make others feel unwelcome. You pretend to be heralds of ultimate truth, but in reality, you’re more like Sméagol arguing with Gollum over a piece of fish:

Loud, repetitive, and missing the point entirely.

If the point of fandom is to celebrate creativity, why are you out here sowing division like a hobbit tossing seeds into a field?

Here’s a thought: instead of spreading paranoia and doubt among your fellow fans/shippers, how about embracing the vast, sprawling tapestry that Tolkien created?

Middle-earth is a living, breathing world, built on interpretation and reinvention. Even Tolkien himself revised his work over and over again! Are we seriously going to act like the man who changed Galadriel’s backstory more times than we can count would be against people exploring different dynamics or relationships in his world?

If you’re genuinely worried about “preserving Tolkien’s vision,” then let’s start by honoring his actual principles: curiosity, kindness, and creativity.

That means encouraging thoughtful debate, not fearmongering.

That means celebrating others’ interpretations, not stomping them out like a Nazgûl extinguishing a flame. And most importantly, that means realizing you don’t own Middle-earth. You’re not the Steward of Gondor; you’re just one voice in a vast and beautiful fandom chorus.

Maybe I’m being a bit of a Watcher in the Water over here, thrashing around and making waves, but I won’t just sit idle, calmly digesting this kind of nonsense like I’m some unfortunate dwarf at the gates of Moria. Nope. I’ve got my Sting out, glowing bright, and I’m calling out the orcish behavior where I see it.

The thing is, fandom isn’t a battlefield where you get to swing your Sword of Sanctimony at anyone who doesn’t align with your narrow perspective. And I’m not about to quietly let you turn Middle-earth into some exclusive club guarded by lorebros who twist Tolkien’s words like Saruman twisting the truth in Orthanc.

So if calling out this kind of toxic nonsense makes me a She-Elf with a sharp tongue (or a bitch), so be it.

Some of you can keep pretending you’re the gatekeepers of what’s “right” or “valid,” but newsflash: the gates of Minas Tirith are open, and fandom belongs to everyone, not just those who yell the loudest.

Maybe I’m being a bitch, but I’d rather be a bitch standing on the side of fun, creativity, and inclusivity than silently swallowing this kind of balrog-tier bullshit.

So yeah, call me delulu if you must. But at least I’m having fun, unlike the self-appointed gatekeepers who seem more miserable than a soggy Gandalf trying to get through Moria. Pass me the tin foil—I’ll fashion it into a crown and wear it proudly while enjoying the creative chaos of this fandom.

[just-antithings]

A person on twitter asked people to share their experiences with becoming profic, and some of the answers gave me hope, so I thought I'd share.

https://twitter.com/Morcoroni/status/1678160747300376579

CW csa, suicide, bullying, lolicon

i was basically anti when i got into fandom cuz i was way young and stupid,it wasnt until 2020 that i realized i was BEING stupid abt restricting myself 💀 i found out abt profic bc a tweet from a profic gimmick account was recommended to me, SO GLAD IT WAS i shudder to think that id basically be guilt tripping myself for forever hadnt that tweet showed up when it did 😭

i was an anti, got dragged into a group of super toxic antis amd lost really close and dear friends, it opened my eyes to see that my behavior was unacceptable and i regret it to this day, i've learned not to judge people so easily and to control my anger issues

Unfortunately mine was when the leopards started eating my face with the jjba ship giomis, then I kinda realized that I was miserable in anti spaces. I’m much happier now :)

I was dogpilled on my diff acc and called "pedo" for saying there should be no big censhorship (as long we are talking about fiction) on AO3 and for shipping otayuri five years prior to the incident. Prior to that I didn't even know that there was smthg like anti/pro divide. Since then I am just staying away from people who are openly antis and I am not posting much anywhere, mainly just lurking.

While not full blown anti i was on that mind set years ago back when i was into she ra. However between a friend explaining things and me seeing jusy how awful antis are i realized what i was doing was wrong and ive never looked back.

Being a CSA victim and harbouring a lot of internalised guilt for reading profiction and imagining myself in that position myself and then just realising hating myself for enjoying that stuff was stupid

I discovered incest shotac0n when I was 13 and fought it for many MANY years. Felt disgusted with myself until Finally told a therapist about it and she was like, "why? Let yourself explore that. It's fictional. Nobody is being hurt" and it just felt so..... freeing.

Japanese artist said he might kill emself because Westerners came to his no interaction pixiv twitter acc and told him he wasva pedophile

When I finally felt the difference between "I don't like it" and "It has to be banned and the creator must die". Censorship would bring me much closer to fascists than a supposed safe place, and I definitely don't want to be associated with these people in the slightest.

I was well into adulthood when the pro-fic movement got underway but I *was* an asshole fic flamer in the 2000s. It wasn't till I saw Klantis in VLD spouting the same reasons of making fandom "better" to be dicks that the weight of my past shittiness really dawned on me.

.

[shivvytheshiv]

ao3 is fucking me up so i’ll post here for the time being. please share with the credits only!!

fandom: hbo succession

ship: roman roy x gerri kellman

themes: it was supposed to be a five times fic but we lower it to three and dont ask questions. precanon + s2 + postcanon. gerri’s practically doing roman character analysis and roman is a slime puppy

It’s 2AM when that happens for the first time — or, at least, that’s how she recalls it an abyss of ten years later. A crazy day filled with Baird’s relatives, hyperactive five graders and “Happy Birthday” pop-tarts was soon to be over, with girls in their beds and Baird hopefully deep in his sleep, and Gerri is cherishing her moment. Any crazy management malfunctions consisting of sleepless nights and Logan throwing laptops at the wall could never stress her out as much as kids birthdays did, but for all she knew she did okay. This one wasn’t a total disaster. Was about time she’d take her mascara off, finish that martini (or what’s left of it), and head to sleep.

Obviously, that’s when the phone rings. How could it not. Gerri takes a long sip and makes up her very own mental kill list, — she will flip Kendall off, she will give Frank a minute to try and talk some sense and flip him off eventually, she will flip Karl off.

”Roman Roy mobile”, her screen confidently says. Gerri likes to think that’s where the problems started.

Roman has always struck her as some twisted middle ground, if that fuckery of a family could ever produce a middle ground. He wasn’t the second Ken, being all over Waystar sniffing cocaine off the executive floor. He wasn’t totally estranged in a different career field (or most literally a field) like Shiv or Connor. Roman was… there, technically. Middle son, various boarding schools, now constantly flying back and forth from California and being a pain in Frank’s ass. Pretty eccentric around the studio. Never missed a corporate retreat. Most information Gerri had on Roman Roy would fit in a nice dry portfolio.

Heavy caged breathing, almost loud enough to disturb the speakers, would not. Sobbing — is he sobbing?

“Gerri. Did they, did I even get the fucking number right? Did they tell you? Are you, like, there yet? You going at all?”

She can physically feel a freezing blow down her spine. He was surely sobbing. Did the old man have a stroke overnight?

“I’m home, Roman. What’s going on?” She tries to balance out the world’s stiffiest question with some softness, too much to her liking, but to no avail.

“Fuck. Fuck! Because I’m dragging my ass all the way from the fucking La-la-land to some hospital, I don’t have the slightest clue where the fuck that’d be, and they didn’t even tell you, and Shiv’s in France for all I know, probably eating a lobster and blowing the cruises dingbat. And dad’s gonna go mental. A great fucking night. They didn’t tell you?”

The shook in his voice is real, and Gerri wishes to believe it’s from the rush: dealing with her own emotions is enough of a challenge, figuring out emotions of a twenty-something nepobaby sounding so broken something sinks down in her ribcage, while knowing so little, is cruel.

“Gerri. Is he, like. Dying?”

Yet, she tries. She puts the glass back on the kitchen sink with a loud, dull noise, she goes for her jacket and the door keys. This fucking job, Gerri thinks. And this fucking family.

“No one is dying, alright? I’ll check on the hospital address and will get back to you. I’ll see you there, Roman.”

*

Surely it was Kendall. Kendall used a bunch and drove his car into an ice cream stand somewhere around Upper Side; smashed the hood, passed out thanks to the airbag and the weight of his own stupidity; the Hosseini kid company didn’t help much. Karolina gets ahold of the situation an hour later, and that’s how Gerri finds out he got away with few broken bones and that the car was apparently Logan’s (a wild and unfortunate combination of factors, if you ask her, but at least Roman’s concerns didn’t live up to be real).

Gerri walks down a hallway and it’s as messy as hospital hallways get: nurses here and there, Shiv’s nervous voice soaking through Karolina’s firm grab (she’s on speakerphone for God knows what reasons), Frank on his phone. She steps into one of the most depressing waiting rooms she’s ever seen and there’s Roman.

Roman is sitting on the floor, head pressed against a couch, eyes closed. An hour isn’t long enough to fall asleep like that, is it? She’s still quiet when sitting down on that very couch. He moves an inch and rests his head against her knee in dead silence.

Not exactly corporate ethics.

“I told you it’s gonna be alright.”

“Yeah, well. He’s one dumb motherfucker.”

The kid’s a mess, after all. Gerri freezes but gives him a moment, — silence, a hand on his forehead, bit of nothing and everything, — and moves out of the picture right before it turns weird.

**

Gerri is reading through an impressive pile of emails when her phone buzzes. And it buzzes some more.

Roman’s been on the trainee programme for three days.

“Roman. What is it?” No deep breaths could help her get through that bullshit, but oh well. Gerri puts him on speaker and tries real hard to concentrate on the legal department’s claims.

“I will literally unalive myself. Not even joking. You have no idea how many rape victims kill themselves per year and this is worse, because that’s mind rape. They have a chainsaw going through my fucking head.”

“You don’t how many rape victims kill themselves per year. How’s that my problem anyway?”

“Yeah, let me think, Professor Fucking Evil. For starters, you sent me.” Roman sounds like he’s about to howl. Gerri hides a smile in her palm and looks around at the office, lights from her lamp playing on glassy walls, her daughters’ framed picture by the computer. Good god, she must look stupid. Nothing about the thing was normal, but Roman Roy had a free pass to everything not-so-normal, and she was genuinely confused at the borders of professionalism and playfulness.

Not unamused though.

“It’s for the better. The outlook back in here is highly positive, Logan’s content, Frank is ecstatic. If I were you I’d strategically choose less whining, more working. Yeah, soldier?”

“Okay, whatever, Herr Gerr. One quality picture would’ve bo-o-o-oosted my work efficiency, just saying.” The line between recent despair in his voice and cat-like audacity is way too blurred.

“Oh, fuck you.”

***

There’s beeps. Some more. Gerri sees him through the matte glass door, back hunched, a red shirt she recognizes from a lifetime before; he doesn’t hang up and stares at the screen. She waits for a split second before hanging up.

Honestly, she’s thankful for not seeing his face.

Gerri thought walking inside is hard but approaching the bar is painful. Roman is gazing at his vodka tonic like there’s some serious answers at the bottom, she breathes in one more and thinks about that nightmare of a company, the work that’s to be done, the way Kendall popped his stitches in that room, the way he stomped all over her twenty five years of work, — not something Gerri would easily forgive, — and the way there’s no saving for these kids. If there was, is it right to drown it in a fucking vodka tonic?

“Hey, rockstar”.

“Hey, molewoman”. A chalk-on-the-board voice. Gerri hesitates for another moment and puts both of her hands over his shoulders.

They stay for a while like that.

[squishmittenficfan]

Thanks so much for the tag, @lilolilyr! This is a really interesting one 😀

I just wish I knew how to do the fancy little title links to everything I’m talking about…

1. How many works do you have on ao3?

A tiny amount in comparison to many, but I’m proud of my 32 works! Considering I’ve had a couple of huge gaps in writing and posting, I’m happy I even got past thirty!

2. What’s your total ao3 word count?

233,653

93.7k in 2018

91.2k in 2019

0 in 2020 Yup, one of those writing gaps was massive!

23.2k in 2021

22.5k in 2022

2834 in 2023 I had to drag those words out as @lilolilyr knows too well, with all my whinging!

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Just Berena. I can’t imagine finding the voice inside my head for any other 🤷🏻‍♀️

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Fight For - 968

You gotta rub me the right way! - 625

Murder on the streets of Holby - 611

Running Away (together) - 470

There’s The Rub - 233

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Absolutely yes. When my stupid brain wanted nothing to do with fic in 2020, one of the things I felt bad about was all the unanswered comments. I like to acknowledge anyone who has taken the time to not only read what I’ve written, but also been kind enough to comment. I know it gets said a lot, but even an emoji left on a chapter or one shot genuinely makes my day! I used to get horribly hung up on comments and kudos, and would get a bit upset if something I posted didn’t get much attention. After my break in posting I became far more chilled about it. I primarily write things that I want to read, so as long as I’m happy with a fic, that’s all that matters. Comments and kudos are just icing on the AO3 cake.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I don’t do unresolved angst! The closest I’ve come is ‘Parting is such sweet sorrow’ because it was for Berena Appreciation Week 2018, and the prompt was angst. It was my take on Serena, in Nairobi, receiving the call from Hanssen, asking her to return to Holby. In my mind, we knew it didn’t spell the end of her relationship with Bernie, so the sad and mildly angsty ending didn’t count.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Everything? 😆

Seriously though, probably ‘Running Away (together)’ because it ended up being the start of the series that saw Serena and Bernie getting married and properly settling down together.

8. Do you get hate on fic?

I think I had one fic get a couple of 💩 comments, but that was when there was a period where there was a contingent of Serena haters who just had to make themselves known. If I recall correctly, I basically replied telling them to fuck off (in the hope they’d used a legit email address and would see my responses!) then deleted the comments…

9. Do you write smut?

I have done. I find it very, very difficult though, and essentially used my first venture into smut as a template for the second and third. It does NOT come easily (ahem!)

10. Do you write crossovers?

Nope. Again, I can’t imagine feeling like I could ‘hear’ any other characters well enough.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I’m aware of. I can’t imagine anything I’ve written would be a big enough target for anyone to bother.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nope

14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?

Berena, obvs!

I’m also reading a LOT of Rizzles these days.

Way, way back in the mists of time, I read a lot of Bad Girls. Also some Willow/Tara and 7/Janeway.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but probably won’t?

My desert island fic - ‘Bernie Wolfe-Born Survivor’ I desperately want it written, but can’t imagine my brain cooperating, sadly. It would need to be a multi-chapter, and I struggled hard enough to squeeze 2834 words out of my brain this year!

16. What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue, I think. My ladies do love to talk! Quite a few people also seem to comment on the humour in my fics, so that as well I guess.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Smut.

Plus just writing anything at all these days. 😕

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Erm… as in including lines in a different language to the main body of the story? It can be frustrating, but if you’re on AO3 and using Chrome (yes, yes I know!) you can just highlight the text and get it translated easily enough. Not so much on FFnet of course…

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Posted - Berena are my one and only, my OTP…

However, I did dip my toe, many years ago, into trying to write a Bad Girls fic. I didn’t get far at all before it stalled. It only took me nearly twenty years to try again!

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

I honestly like everything I’ve written. I wouldn’t have posted it otherwise!

I think I’m most proud of good old Dead Ed (aka Murder on the streets of Holby) though. As well as being my longest, it also has the most complex storyline and took a fair amount of planning out. From someone who very much winged most things up until that point, it was a bit daunting. Plus the worry that people might find the reveal of the murderer disappointing was a bit stressful, I must admit!

Blanks to copy:

1. How many works do you have on ao3? 2. What’s your total ao3 word count? 3. What fandoms do you write for? 4. What are your top five fics by kudos? 5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? 6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? 7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? 8. Do you get hate on fic? 9. Do you write smut? 10. Do you write crossovers? 11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? 12. Have you ever had a fic translated? 13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? 14. What’s your all-time favourite ship? 15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but probably won’t? 16. What are your writing strengths? 17. What are your writing weaknesses? 18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? 19. First fandom you wrote for? 20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

I’m not going to tag anyone, but I do recommend anyone who writes and has the time, to do it… it’s fun looking at the stats and thinking about all things fic related!

Thanks again for the tag, @lilolilyr, I really did enjoy this 😁

[delphiniumarchangelmoon]

I’m not gonna say which fandom but there is a small anime fandom I wrote a few fics god when I was in college and…

When I went back and sorted by kudos my very first fic I wrote, a really shit one shot, is the most kudos’d fic in the entire fandom. Which at first was really shocking and kinda scary cause, I didn’t even really like that fic when I wrote it it was just one of those weird soulmate gimmick meet-cutes and it wasn’t even good.

And I feel so fucking vindicated tbh cause the reason I left the fandom is cause the tumblr fanbase was like 5 people and a goldfish and I VEHEMENTLY despised the most popular person cause their entire blog was dedicated to shipping a violent murderer with his little brother (who canonically hates him because the guy ruined his life and dragged his reputation through the mud) and wrote really violent fanfictions of said younger brother being abused by his brother.

And yet

I WAS THE ONE WHO GOT SHIT ON BY EVERYONE BECAUSE THE PAIR I WROTE HAD A TWO YEAR AGE DIFFERENCE (16 and 18)

WHY was I the one getting hate???? I can really only assume it’s cause that fucker couldn’t stand that I didn’t bow at their feet like the rest of the fandom was doing and decided to think of the first thing they could to get mad at me about.

but now my stupid little oneshot has ALL THE GODDAMN KUDOS and they get NOTHING! I WIN! It was the lost mediocre thing i ever published and it’s the MOST POPULAR FIC IN THE WHOLE TAG! FUCK YOU!

looking for fics about your favorite character on ao3 be like:

dont care

dont care

dont care

what the actual fuck

dont care

ooh that sounds- what the fuck

unfinished

don't care

the best fic ive ever read in my life. this absolutely ruined me and ill never be the same ever again

dont care

[outivv]

The idea of the boys missing you really makes me soft. Imagine them suddenly stopping whatever they're doing thinking "I wonder where they are, I wish they were here" and feeling all the more lonelier once they remember you won't be coming home before a good while :( (I feel like the most love-starved ones would be especially affected, like Diluc and Xiao) Hcs for these two + Zhongli and Childe longing their s/o and what they do to cope with the gap? How often do they think about them, what do they miss the most about them? What's their first reaction seeing them back, how clingy are they afterwards?

Synopsis: clingy headcanons with genshin characters

Characters: Diluc, xiao, zhongli, and Childe

Warnings: none it’s really just fluff

Game/ fandom: genshin impact

Pronouns for reader: gender neutral/ not mentioned

A/n: hello! Thank you for requesting! I personally am very clingy so writing this just made me feel very soft :’) I hope you enjoy, and have a nice day!

— Diluc —

I’m pretty sure we can all accept that Diluc is super touch starved. And I personally feel like he just always craves your touch. He isn’t like creepy about it though. He just wants to feel loved :(

So when you say that you’re going to liyue for a couple of days to get some materials, he feels his heart absolutely drop. He’s not gonna show it though. He’s too stubborn for that.

He literally can’t sleep without you. He just needs the comfort of you being in the same house. He tosses and turns almost all night until he just gets up and starts working. The maids are very confused, and of course they start gossiping. As usual.

He thinks about you all. the. time. Eating breakfast is a reminder of how you aren’t there to make him smile right away in the morning. Going to mondstadt feels lonely even though he’s surrounded by people.

All of this makes him sound like he’s not self sufficient. Which... no, he is. He can handle himself but the gears in head are turning relentlessly with the thought of you constantly.

He mostly just starts working more with your absence. There isn’t much else to do without you here, so why not get some work done.

What Diluc misses most about you is your presence. He just wants you to be there, with him.

The moment you walk back into the winery, he rushes out of his office and calmly (not very calmly) goes down the stairs to embrace you in a warm hug.

He’s pretty clingy afterwards. He puts some work things on hold and just spends a few days with you. For these few days he is strictly little spoon. No if, ands, or buts. He is little spoon.

Constantly tells you how he missed you and loves you. You rarely see this side of him, so make sure to treasure it. For it is fairly short lasting.

— xiao —

Oh boy. He rarely gets clingy with you, but when he does he doesn’t hold back. And when he finds out you’re leaving for a few days to go help someone named jean with some stupid hilichurl problems for a few days. He is lowkey grumpy, but at the same time he understands.

Xiao isn’t good with coping... he bottles everything inside and kinda just expects it to go away. (But xiao that’s not gonna work when you keep thing about it)

He constantly thinks about you. He wonders if you’ll be ok, what you’re doing in mondstadt, and even if you’re safe with the people you’re staying with. He just wants to make sure you’re ok.

What he misses most about you is just your voice. He just wants to listen to you talk about the dumbest things. Sometimes he finds it annoying but he never realized how much he’d miss your “annoying” voice until now.

His first reaction is just a mix of shock, and a ‘holly shit I just want to hug them but don’t want to seem weird’. So he just kinda... stands there, holding onto the end of his shirt wanting to hug you so freaking bad. Please just hug the poor boy :(

He would be extremely clingy afterwards, but he doesn’t want to be. He wants to hold you so close, and bury his face in the crook of your neck as you play with his hair. But instead he just sits two feet away from you staring at the ground.

He doesn’t know how to initiate it so he’s gonna wait for you to. But once you do... you aren’t getting up. He quite literally has infinite time to waste, so you aren’t getting up.

— Zhongli —

Zhongli is an independent adult who can survive on his own for about a week as you help beidou with some stuff on her ship. That being said he literally can’t sleep without you.

Like he will hold onto your pillow cause he just can’t sleep without you next to him.

He doesn’t exactly cope with it either... he’s like xiao, and waits for it to go away except he keeps reminding himself that you’ll be back in x amount of days.

He thinks of you a lot. Zhongli has an impeccable memory, so it’s not really a surprise when he thinks of you a lot.

He misses the sight of you the most. A bit odd I know. But he genuinely just loves staring at you. Just admiring the minor things you do, and you still look gorgeous.

Zhongli isn’t a very clingy person at all, but he does still have his moments. Another thing he misses most is cuddling with you and feeling you play with his hair. Just holding you so close and your hands run through the long strands of his hair.

When he sees you he greets you with a kiss and hug, and whispers in your ear an ‘I love you, and I thought if you everyday’

He won’t be very clingy at first, but then it kicks in that you were gone for a little over a week. Zhongli s basically like, ‘wow you were gone for a little over a week and now you’re here... huh... well time to cuddle with my s/o’

He’s just a bit softer with you than he usually is. And that’s saying something because zhongli is typically very soft, and gentle with you.

— Childe —

Sheesh, when you told him that you were called out for a commission in mondstadt that would take a while, he just started pouting. Like a baby. An actual child.

He understands that work is work, and also understands what going away due to said work is like. So he understands and respects you for that. But that doesn’t mean he has to like it.

Literally every morning he just groans cause you aren’t next to him to kiss him, and say good morning.

He thinks of you all the time, but it’s like ‘hey I wonder what y/n would like for dinner? Wait... goddammit they’re not here... well... that sucks for me’

He doesn’t really have time to cope, so he just constantly tries to think if other things than you.

When you get back Childe is all over you. No joke, mans literally drags you back home to cuddle.

Will constantly tell you how much he loves you and not to leave for that long again, and that next time he’s coming with you.

[rocksandrobots]

Phantoms of the Past Chapter 34 - What’s In a Name?

"And I would have gotten away with it too, if it wasn't for you meddling superheroes and your pesky robot!" Baron Von Steamer yelled as the police dragged him away.

Big Hero Six stood to the side, watching as he was arrested.

"Yep, yep, yep... another day another supervillain down for the count." Varian smugly said as he placed the chimball back into his coat pocket.

"I thought you weren't into this superhero thing?" Hiro sly teased him.

"I'm not, but you guys need me to keep you out of trouble."

He ignored his friends rolling their eyes as he turned to leave, only to stop short when a microphone was shoved into his face.

"Portal Pirate, do you have any words on the capture of Baron Von Steamer?" The reporter yelled at him.

"Uh...."

Soon another reporter joined the first. "Portal Pirate, is it true that you're from another world?"

"Should we start calling Big Hero Six Big Hero Seven?" A third called out.

Suddenly reporters and paparazzi swarmed around him. Varian stumbled backwards, stuttering his confused answers, until they had backed him into a wall.

"Portal Pirate, how did you meet Big Hero Six?"

"Where do you buy your clothes? The public wants to know."

"Is there any truth to the rumors that you're dating Tall Girl?"

"That's not my name!" Honey Lemon yelled, no one listened to her.

"How does your portal tech work?"

"Can you time travel? Like that guy who was rescued from the fire."

"Do you actually bleed green blood?"

"Is it true that you were once a supervillain?"

"I... uh... well, umm.... what?"

Fortunately, Gogo came to his rescue. She pushed past the paparazzi, grabbed him by the waste, and quickly skated away. The rest of Big Hero Six followed after them while the sensationalist reporters started to frantically come up with new explanations to explain their abrupt departure.

                                                  ----------------------

"Hey look what I found!" Fred yelled as he ran into the meeting room of their headquarters, waving a magazine. "We're on the cover of the National Inquisitor!"

"That trash tabloid?" Tadashi asked as Fred handed him the newspaper. He looked down at it with a frown, and then snorted with laughter upon reading the title.  

"What's so funny?" Gogo asked as she glanced over the cover. "Ugh... what the...?"

Her lip curled up in disgust as she read the headline. "Super romance in the air. San Fransokyo's newest power couple the Portal Pirate and Speed Queen are quite the stylish item! Eww, no! Who came up with this?!"

The picture on the front was of her carrying Varian away from the crowd of reporters.

"Oh, I don't know. I think you make quite the cute couple." Tadashi teased over her shoulder as he took a sip of his coffee. He then had to quickly hold his cup out of the way when Gogo smacked him with the paper.

Fred pulled up more info on his phone. "They're calling your ship name PirateQueen. It's trending on twitter."

Gogo quietly seethed as she ripped the magazine in two.

Curious Varian peered over Fred's shoulder to read the tweets. "What's 'TallPirate'?"

"Oh that's the name for yours and Honey Lemon's pairing. There's apparently a ship war going on right now in the fandom."

Varian furrowed his brow in confusion, but Honey Lemon only growled in response, muttering something about how she hated being called 'Tall Girl' under her breath.

"So who do they ship you with?" Tadashi asked with a suppressed laugh.

"Well sometimes with Varian, but most of the time it's Wasabi. But no one will use my suggested ship name!" Fred whined.

"Ship name?" Wasabi asked. "You gave us a ship name?"

"Oh I made up ship names for everyone in the group, but nobody listened to me. I suggested Fredsabi, but the internet has deemed us LizardChop instead. Pfft.. what a stupid name. Am I right?"

"Maybe that's because no one knows our actual names Fred?" Hiro matter-of-factly suggested as he read a readout on Baymax's chest.

"Oh, yeah, well maybe you wouldn't be so nonchalant if you knew that your most tweeted ship name is LabCuite." Wasabi smugly pointed out.

"What!?" Hiro stopped what he was doing and rushed over to grab the phone out of Wasabi's hands. He stared at all of the fan art of him and Karmi completely weirded out. "She not even in the group!"

"Yeah, but everyone thinks she's your girlfriend cause you've rescued her so many times." Fred explained as he took back his phone. "Your's is the the most popular ship... right behind TallQueen."

"Arragh!" Honey Lemon suddenly yelled before grabbing the remote and turning the overhead tv on. "Enough with the stupid superhero names already, let's find someone to beat up, or something."

She flipped the channel to the news, just in time for a commercial break.

"Hello San Fransokyo!" Mr. Sparkles shouted through the other side of the tv screen, as he bounced around a stage. "Tired of being a nobody? A loser ? A chump? Can't get the girl, or that high end desk job? Sick of constantly being passed over and ignored? Well have I got good news for you! I'm Mr. Sparkles, image consultant to the stars, and I can make you a somebody! I've put super villains and heroes alike on the map. For example, I've rebranded High Voltage into the top act at San Fransokyo's newest must see attraction at the Hamilton Theater."

The camera cut to Juniper and Barb dancing on stage. They looked like they were having a blast, and there was Stu skating in the background.

"I'm also responsible for Momasake's new thrilling tell-all book, 'The Time Traveling Ninja'."

The scene cut a second time to the aged Momasake sitting in jail while holding up the cover to her novel. "Only $39.00, pre-order today." She said flatly, as if she hated every moment of being on camera. Then the scene switched back to Mr. Sparkles, with an image of Varian in the corner.

"And, no one even knew who the Portal Pirate was until he met me. I can give you a whole new look, a new name, a new identity that will be sure to guarantee you success. Just call Sparkle's Starmaker Services today, for your free consultation!! That's 555-535-4523... and no, that number is not toll free."

Wasabi narrowed his eyes as the commercial ended. "What is he up to?"

"I don't know, but we should probably keep a close eye on him." Hiro said as he rubbed his chin.  

"Maybe he's turned over a new leaf?" Honey Lemon suggested. "After all he's helped Barb and Juniper to find work... maybe this could be a good thing?"

"Oh please," Gogo rolled her eyes. "This is clearly some kind of con."

"Yeah, but is it an illegal con?" Fred asked. "As far as I know there's no law saying that you can't be an agent. So long as he offers the usual ten percent rate, I don't think we can pin anything on him."

"Maybe not, but it's still scummy." Varian growled.

"Indeed." Baymax agreed.

As they finished talking the news came back on and they saw Hardlight breaking into a bank.

"Alright, hero time!" Fred yelled.

"Everyone suit up. Be ready to go in five minutes." Hiro ordered and the gang dispersed to their rooms to prepare. Everyone save for Tadashi that is.

"You sure you don't wanna give the superhero thing a second try?" He asked his brother.

"No, you go on head and have fun." Tadashi said as he leaned against the conference table and took another sip of his coffee. "I'll hold down the fort."

Hiro shrugged. "Okay. It's your loss." And with that, he and Baymax left to change into their armor.

                                                 ----------------------

Mr. Sparkles checked his watch. His client was running late. He stole a guarded glance at his surroundings. Good Luck Ally wasn't an unusual meeting place for his more unsavory clientele, but it still paid to be careful when hanging around the notorious street. He patted what looked like a lime-green squirt gun holstered around his waist. Yup, you could never be too careful.

Suddenly a tall, ominous figure dropped to the ground behind him. Mr. Sparkles jumped and brandished the water pistol.

"Who's there?"

"No, wait... It's okay I won't hurt you." Said a kind voice, and the lithe figure stepped out of the shadows.

"Tall Girl? What are you doing here? I did my time. I'm not doing anything wrong... Is this a set up?" Mr Sparkles eyed the woman suspiciously.

"No..." The superhero sighed. "I'm the one who called you. I want to employ your services."

"My services... You mean you want me as an agent? Wait... wwhhhyyy?"

"I hate my name!" The tall girl blurted out. "Tall Gril sounds so stupid, and I'm not even that tall! I'm only 5.10."

Sparkles raised a skeptical eyebrow as he looked up at her. "Not from where I'm standing, sweetheart."

"Well of course everyone one's tall to you." She suddenly snapped. "You're what, three feet?"

"Well that was rude."

She gasped as if she only just realized what she had just said. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry, that was mean. It's just... you should know how hard it is to have everyone turn your height into a joke."

"Alright... alright... I'll help you out, but it'll cost ya."

"How much?" The girl nervously wrung her hands.

"How much you got?" Sparkles asked with a sly smile.

"Ummmm... I have stickers!" She pulled off a smiling taco sticker from her chim-pruse, and held it up. "This one's from a limited edition YakiTaco promotional campaign. Fred gave it to me."

Sparkles silently eyed her up and down, and for a moment Honey Lemon feared that he would turn her away. Then he shrugged and said, "Huh? Why not?"

He then took the sticker from her and placed it on top of his forehead. "Okay, 'Not-Tall Girl', whataya want from me? As in what are your personal goals?"

"I want you to help me create a new superhero name like you did for Vari- the Portal Pirate. Get people to call me something else... anything else. Maybe something cool and chemistry related?"

"Chemistry related... hmmm?" he rubbed his chin in thought.

"Oh and cute too, something feminine sounding... but not too girly.. and-"

"Okay, okay, slow down hero girl. You're new at this, I get it. It's exciting, but it takes more to change an image than just a simple name change. Especially when you already have an established persona that you have to work against."

Honey Lemon pouted. "So what do I do?"

"Nothing, for now." Mr. Sparkles folded his arms. "You just keep on being your superhero self doing your 'superheroey' things and I'll be spending time brainstorming ideas." He then reached into his coat pocket and handed her a card. "Here's my card. Try calling me in a like a day or two. Toodle-oo."

                                                 ----------------------

Precisely two days later, there was another robbery. This time with Sirque at a KreiTech warehouse down by the docks.

The gang of college kids were eating takeout ramen when their computer system sounded the alarm inside their headquarters.

"Haven't seen her in awhile." Wasabi said as he put on his armor. "Wonder what she's been up to since Momasake's arrest?"

"Probably trying to recover all of those files that were lost when Callaghan and Sue set fire to the abandoned power plant." Fred suggested before shoving a bunch of noodles into his mouth.

"Yeah, and she's most likely robbing Krei for more equipment to build her portals with." Gogo said as she readjusted her blades.

"Well, why don't we arrive in style and show her up?" Varian gave a sly smile before opening a miniature portal to the warehouse.

Fred gulped down the last of his soup, slammed the plastic container back down, and then jumped from the table.

"Alright, I'm ready!" He shouted before pulling his helmet over his face and running through the portal.

Everyone followed him through, yet Hiro paused at the entrance to see Tadashi once again staying behind.

"I'm guessing you're not joining us for this outing either?" He asked, though he already knew the answer.

Tadashi slurped up a noodle and then pointed his chopsticks back at his brothers. "Nope, but call me if you need me. I'll keep an eye on things here."

"If you say so." Hiro shrugged before stepping through the portal.

"See ya, Tadashi." Varian waved goodbye before closing the portal.

Tadashi waited a moment or two longer, watching the space where the portal had been. When he was sure no one else was coming back, he turned around and typed in a command into the computer.

The security camera within the lab shut off, though he kept the ones outside running. Then he walked over to the tool rack and grabbed a pair of goggles and a soldering tool.

"Alright, let's see about those microchips shall we?" He said to no one, as he pulled out a hidden compartment underneath the work desk. He removed what looked like a biker's helmet from the drawer, sat it down on the desk, put on the goggles, and got to work with the soldering iron.

                                                 ----------------------

Sirque escaped in a cloud of smoke. Varian couldn't be sure if she had used a miniature portal like his own or if she had used the smoke screen as a misdirection to slip away. Either way she had disappeared and made off with hundreds of thousands of dollars in equipment.

Worse still, the news was on hand to cover their failure.

"This is Bluff Dunder providing you with live coverage of today's latest super fiasco." The reporter ignored the scornful glares of the superheroes as he shoved a microphone into Hiro's face. "Captain Cutie do you have any words on Sirque's escape?"

"No comment." Hiro sighed before turning away and hopping on Baymax's back.

Before they could lift off, more journalists surrounded the group.

"Captain Cutie, is there any reason why we haven't seen Lab Lady lately?"

"Speed Queen, what shoes do you recommend for young athletes?"

"What planet are you from Portal Pirate?"  

"Chop Chop, is it true that you and Lizard Guy got engaged? When's the wedding?"

"Tall Girl? Is there any truth to the rumor that the Portal Pirate dumped you for Speed Queen?"

"I'm not 'Tall Girl'!" Honey Lemon screamed as Varian created another portal to escape with.

He grabbed her hand and pulled her through before an argument could start and the rest of the gang followed after.

"Is that your headquarters?" One bold reporter ran forward, only for Varian to unceremoniously turn the portal off blocking their view of the meeting room.

                                                 ----------------------

Mr. Sparkles looked at his watch as she stood under the lamppost. His client had called him back sooner than expected, almost in tears from some sort of incident with the press. They were running late, again.

Just when he was about to give up and go home, he spotted a tall figure moving within the shadows. He gave a sly smile.

"You got the stuff?" He asked.

Honey Lemon stepped out the shadows carrying a black folder in her arms.

"Oh I got the stuff." She said seriously.

Then she opened the binder to reveal rows upon rows of stickers.

"Oooh, a special HelloDoggie sticker!" The villain waggled his fingers in delight and reached out to grab the folder. Honey Lemon sntached it back out of his reach.

"Un-huh... whatcha ya got for me first?" She said as she wagged her finger at him.

"Oh alright?" Sparkles finished rolling his eyes and pulled out a little flip book from his pocket. "So here's the names I've come up with so far... Her Hydrogen Highness, The Chemist Cutiepie, or maybe the Crowned Chemist so as not to be too similar to Captain Cuite... Hmm..." He struck a line through the name with his pen. "The Particle Pharaoh, The Pretty Pharmacist, aaannd the Alchemical Angel."

Honey Lemon thoughtfully went over the names in her head... "I don't  know... none of those really.. seem.. to fit.... Also alchemy isn't really chemistry."

"Well you try coming up with scientific superhero names in only two days." Mr. Sparkles snapped back. "Besides, you need more than just a name. If you want people to suddenly start calling you by a different title than you need to change your whole look. Force them to see you differently so that they have no choice to associate you with with a new name."

"What kind of look?" Honey Lemon pouted.

"I'm glad you asked." Mr. Sparkles winked at her, and then opened up the briefcase he was carrying. "I and the boys in the lab have been cooking up something special just for you."

He pulled out a pink flouncy princess gown and handed it to her. Honey Lemon held up the dress to examine it. It looked like a cheap Halloween costume. It even had a clearance tag still stuck to it.

"I don't think this is going to work...." She hesitantly said. "I mean it's not very practical for moving around in."

"Hey, you said you wanted to be girly." Mr. Sparkles defended.

Honey Lemon sighed. "Alright I'll try it, but I'll need to make some... adjustments to it."

"Sure. Anything you can do to make yourself look more unique and stand out the better. Now for my payment?"

Mr. Sparkles giggled like a schoolgirl as Honey Lemon gave him her exclusive HelloDoggie stickers. He placed one right on his nose and Honey used her chim-boots to jump up on top of the trash bins. One more jump would send her to the roof of the building but Mr. Sparkles stopped her with a question.

"Oh, by the way! How do I contact you if I need to!?"

"Oh... uh... Well... I guess I can give you my card." She hastily wrote her phone number down on a slip of paper and threw it down at him, before bounding away., hoping that she wouldn't regret this.

                                                 ----------------------

"Ummm... Honey Lemon... What are you wearing?" Hiro asked as the gang met up in front of Varian's portal.

"I thought I'd try a new look," She awkwardly replied.

She had cut the princess costume down and was wearing it over her usual armor. She had removed the front fabric so that her usual tights were visible and the skirt flared out in the back. She had also removed the longer sleeves so that only the puffy tops remained and they went over her shoulder pads while her usual arm guards showed underneath. The high collar was gone and the fake corset was wrapped around her waist under her breastplate. To complete the look she had stuck a sticker of a crown onto her helmet.

"What do you think?" She asked as gave a little twirl.

Her friends gave nervous looks at one another. No one wanted to tell her how bad it looked.

"Don't ask me." Wasabi excused. "I don't know anything about fashion."

"It looks kind of impractical for superheroing." Tadashi offered up.

"Well whatever it is, it's too late to change now." Varian said as she pointed at the portal. "There goes Sue breaking patrol again."

"I'm on it." Gogo said before skating after the elder villain. The rest of the gang followed, save for Tadashi again.

He calmly waited for the portal to close once more, turned off the cameras, and then went to the work desk. This time he pulled out a black piece of fabric and some wires.

                                                 ----------------------

Supersonic Sue cackled as she managed to dodge the young skater once again.

"Maybe they should call you Slow Queen instead!?" She taunted back.

She didn't notice Honey Lemon taking aim at her with a sticky chimball.

Yet as she went to throw the alchemical orb, her poofy skirt snagged onto a storm drain on the wall of the building that she was pressed against. She tripped and fell, ripping the dress and getting covered in her own glue trap.

As she tried to struggle out of her sticky situation Honey lemon noticed the flash of a camera, and then another. She turned to see reporters capturing her slip up on film.

She gave up struggling and sighed. She wanted to cry. She would never hear the end of this.

Sue laughed again as she passed Honey Lemon by, only she did look where she was going and slammed right into Baymax. She stopped hard and fell backwards, dropping the stolen loot.

"Always look both ways before crossing the street." The robot pointed out before  picking her up by the back of the collar.

"Unhand me you over-grown galoot!" She kicked and squirmed in protest as he carried her off to police who were just now arriving on the scene.

Varian came over to free Honey Lemon from the chim-trap, sprinkling something onto the goop to make it dissolve faster, while Hiro returned the loot. He helped her up and then opened a portal back to HQ. They all made their escape before any more nosy reporters or cops could question them further.

                                                 ----------------------

"Oooh why did Karmi have to give me that stupid nickname!" Honey Lemon wailed as she read the headline on the front cover of the local newspaper: 'Tall Girl Finds Herself In A Sticky Situation.' It was bad enough being humiliated but they still were calling her by her old title.

"To be fair, she has tried to fix it, but no one listened to her." Hiro defended.

"I know... and I know she didn't actually know who we were when she wrote that fan fic but... oooohhh." Honey Lemon laid her head down on the meeting table with a moan.

Varian gave her a sympathetic pat on the back.

"That's the price of fame sometimes." Wasabi sighed as he picked up the newspaper. "We're just red meat to the public."

"All the more reason to avoid the superhero gig." Tadashi said as he leaned against the wall and took a sip out of his coffee cup.

"Yeah, I realize now that we maybe should have gotten ahead of the curve on the whole individual superhero identity thing." Fred added.

Gogo took the newspaper away from Wasabi and flipped to the gossip column. "So where are you and Wasabi going on your honeymoon, Lizard Guy?" She teased.

"Personally I think a vacation to Cancun sounds nice this time of year." Wasabi joked.

"Oh yeah, well when are you and Honey Lemon mud wrestling for Varian's affections?" Fred shot back as he showed a social media post calling for such a thing.

"Okay, that's gotta be the dumbest way to resolve a love triangle." Gogo sneered.

"Why would anyone wrestle in mud?" Varian echoed confused. "Now in cool-whip though, like when the Sandra Sisters faced off against the Brite Boys.. now that would be a show!" He laughed and gave Honey Lemon a friendly nudge. "Hey, remember that night? The main fight was the Vanguard vs the Marauder rematch. We should go again soon, that would help take your mind off of things."

Honey Lemon lifted her head up and gave him a pitiful pout, wiping the smile right off Varian's face. She then heaved a deep sigh and  stood up.

"Thanks for trying to cheer me up guys,,, but I just... I need some time to me self." And with that, she went upstairs to her room.

                                                 ----------------------

Honey Lemon jolted upright when her cell phone rang. She had been crying alone at her desk and was caught off guard by the sound.

"Hel-hello?" She sniffled as she held the phone up to her ear.

"Hey, 'Not' Tall Girl." Sparkles voice sounded out from the speaker. "I saw the news today. Ha! What a disaster, am I right?"

"The dress was your stupid idea!" Honey Lemon snapped, suddenly becoming angry.

"Easy, I know, I know... the new look didn't do anything for you.. yet, but I got the perfect plan to turn things around."

Honey Lemon folded her arms and huffed. "This had better be good."

"Oh it is! It is! Trust me, this is going to revolutionize your entire image. I got you and all your little superhero friends an exclusive guest spot on San Fransokyo Tonight. And don't worry, no one will ask you anything about your real identities; I've made sure of that. Just arrive tomorrow at studio 8 around 6 o' clock wearing your supergear."

"Oh... umm... you want all of us there?"

"Of course. If everyone on your team starts referring to you by a different name publicly then that'll help push the image that you want to portray. Also, they could take this as an opportunity... umm.. shall we say, rectify any misunderstandings that they've had with the press."

Honey Lemon pouted as she thought over Sparkles proposal. It all sounded reasonable, but how would she get the rest of the gang to go along?

"What... What time do you need us to be there again?"

"Six o'clock sharp. You go on air at seven. That'll give you time for wardrobe and makeup, and allow me to run by you any pointers or suggestions I have. I've been narrowing down more names and I think I've come up with the best one yet."

"Oh? What is it?"

"I'll tell you tomorrow after I've workshopped it a bit. Oh... and bring the sticker book."

With that he hung up and Honey Lemon was left sitting in her room, conflicted as ever.

She remained there a little longer, wringing her hands. She hadn't actually agreed to Sparkles scheme but she hadn't actually told him no either.

Finally she gave up deliberating and decided to head downstairs.

She cautiously poked her head out into the hallway. The old office buildings inside the abandoned candy factory had been converted into bedrooms for the superheroes. Unlike the studio apartment she shared with Gogo, Honey Lemon had her own room to sleep in, and now that the two bathrooms and kitchen had been added, the entire headquarters could serve as a second home for its members. Hence why everyone had been staying there more .

Normally, Honey Lemon would have been overjoyed to be living with her friends,  the more the merrier in her opinion, normally, but that also meant she now had to avoid more people when she didn't want to face anybody.

She saw no one about and tentatively stepped out of the room. She then began to silently slip down the hallway.

First she came upon Hiro's room. He had his door open a crack and was chatting with Karmi on the phone. They had been talking more frequently lately, Honey Lemon noted. Once again, she'd usually be thrilled at her friends' budding romance, but right now she was more concerned with not being noticed. Fortunately Hiro was too focused on his crush to look her way.

The second door she came upon was, fortunately for her, closed. Though she did hear Fred loudly bouncing on his bed as he excitedly discussed his day with Minimax. His retelling was extremely embellished as usual.

Next was the bathroom and finally Varian's room. His door was left wide open and Honey Lemon quickly pressed herself against the wall so that he wouldn't see her. She needn't have worried though, for she soon heard a light snore coming from inside. She peaked her head around to find him asleep; his head at the base of the bed, one foot on the head board, another precariously hanging off the side. He looked like he would fall off at any moment if tried to turn at all.

She tipped-toed past him, and then hurried down the stairs.

She had managed to make it all the way to the kitchen without being seen, but when she opened the door she found Tadashi inside, holding a mini-screwdriver and fooling with a circuit board at the table.

They both jumped as soon as they noticed the other's presence. Tadashi quickly pocketed the tools, while Honey Lemon started stuttering excuses that were never asked for.

"I.. I just.. came in here for a snack."

"Yeah... I .. uh.. thought I'd have another cup of coffee." He lied as he walked over to the coffee pot.

"Wait... you're going to drink coffee right before bed?"

Tadashi paused. "Well... ummm. Who says I'm going to bed? I thought I would work on my final project... ha.. uh... Did you say you wanted a snack?"

He opened the fridge and pulled out a pudding cup. Honey Lemon took it but didn't make any moves to eat it.

"Is something wrong?" He asked as he noticed her frown.

"I just hate being called 'Tall Girl'." She grumbled. "Tadashi, what would you do to get people to see you differently?"

"Uh... differently?  Like trying to throw a giant Halloween party in the hopes that people will stop thinking of you as just the failed hero all the time? That kind of 'differently'?"

"Don't say that." She softly chided. "You're a real hero... I'm sure you didn't manage to save anyone but that's not the point. The point is that you tried to help."

"And wound up giving everyone I know tons of trauma that'll last them a lifetime. Thank you." He gave a mock bow, before standing up and shaking his head. "Yeah.. I appreciate the sentiment, but that's not actually making me feel any better. In fact, I almost wish people weren't so nice about it sometimes. Let's call it for what it is. I screwed up, end of story. Maybe I'll be smarter about it next time."

Honey Lemon gave him a confused pout as he muttered this last sentence under his breath. He wouldn't give her a chance to comment though.

"So what about you? Why do you hate being called tall?"

"Because I'm not tall.' She whined with a little stamp of her foot.

"Um... Honey Lemon... you're like over six feet. That's pretty tall."

"I'm only 5.10." She sulked.

"Yeah... that's still kind of tall..." He backed away quickly when he noticed the angry glare that she shot at him. "What!? It's the truth! And I don't why you think that's a bad thing, either? You're like a freakin' super model! You could sneak onto a runway and no one would know the difference."

"You don't understand." She flopped down onto the kitchen chair with a defeated sigh.

"Alright, I don't understand... So why don't you explain it to me?" He took the seat across from her.

Honey Lemon seemed hesitant to answer, but he clearly wasn't willing to let the matter go as he rest his chin upon his fist and looked at her expectantly.

"It's just... I hate being reminded of that... I'm different. Everyone teased me about my height growing up, and all the guys in school were too intimidated to talk to me. Andre was the only person to ever ask me out, and that's because he was the only person in the school who was actually taller than me."

"I'm sure that's not the only reason he asked you out." Tadashi interrupted.

"Well, of course not... but it makes a difference. It shouldn't... but no guy wants to constantly grab a ladder every time he wants to kiss his girlfriend!"

"Now we both know that's not true. Honey Lemon, as a guy, I can assure that there are men out there who would love nothing more than to date a girl who towers over them. In fact I know specifically several from school alone."

"Anyone I actually know?" She sadly asked

"I can think of at least one." He slyly smiled.

Honey Lemon blinked in surprise and then screwed up her face in thought... "You don't mean creepy Kevin in thermodynamics class?" She asked, her voice less than thrilled.

Tadashi stifled a laugh. "Nooo... That's not who I had in mind, but I guess he's an option as well."

Honey Lemon curled up her lip. "No he's not."

"How long are you going to let Andre hold you back?" He suddenly asked, growing serious.

Honey Lemon stared at him in shock, his words cutting deep.

"He's not holding me back!" She protested. "How did we even get on this topic?"

"Honey Lemon it's been over a year. I understand wanting to take time for yourself, but you act like you're too afraid to even think about dating."

"That's ridiculous... I just... haven't met anyone yet."

Tadashi gave her a look that told her he wasn't buying that excuse.

"What does it matter if I go on a date or not? I got school to think about, and superheroing to do... and... and my friends to hang out with. I'm much too busy to be dating."

"That's your mother talking." He said with a sigh as he took a sip of coffee.

"What's that supposed to mean!?"

He sat the coffee down and looked her dead in the eye. "Why did you sign up for a second major?"

"Because I like art."

"Yeah, but you could paint on your own anytime. Did you really need to take up a second class load of work to do it."

"I'm learning a lot there."

"Any of these things you couldn't just from MeTube videos?"

"A classroom is an entirely different setting alright and-"

"And it's something that would please your mom, because she would rather have you get a degree than a boyfriend, right?"

Honey Lemon gave him a cold hard glare. "I'm not having this conversation with you." She suddenly said and then stood up from the table leaving the forgotten pudding cup behind.

Tadashi wasn't willing to end things there however, "And by going to two different schools how on earth will you ever have time for a social life?" He yelled after her.

"I'm not listening to you." She called back as she walked out of the kitchen.

Tadashi didn't follow her. Instead he leaned back in his seat, took another sip of coffee and silently counted to three.

His timing was impeccable as Honey Lemon burst through the door again and stormed back over to him.

"How could you say that!?" She sobbed.

"Because you're my friend and I worry about you."

"I thought friends were supposed to encourage you?"

"I am! I'm encouraging you to stand up to your mother and live your life."

"And what does any of this have to do with people calling me Tall Girl!?

"What people? Does anyone who actually knows you call you that? Why are you so hung up on what other people think about you, Amanda?"

Honey Lemon paused upon hearing her real name. "You... haven't called me that in a long time."

"Because I want to make sure that you really hear me. You're amazing, Amanda Rodriguez, and you don't need approval from anybody else. Not the press, not your mom, and not some lame boyfriend that decided to go to Princeton."

Honey Lemon's lip quivered as she hugged herself.

Tadashi frowned and spread his arms wide. "I'm sorry... come here."

She rushed to him and he wrapped her into a large bear hug as she cried.

"Hey... It's okay... shh... It's okay..." he whispered.

After a few moments she started to calm down. She sniffled and squeezed him back.

"You know you're more than just some 'fail hero' right? You're the best friend that anybody could ask for."

"Well, I try…" He laughed and they both broke into snickers.

                                                 ----------------------

"So you got this tip from where, now?" Hiro asked as the gang sat at the conference table, the following day.

"Mr. Sparkles." Honey Lemon nervously bit her lip.

"How did he get a hold of you?" Gogo asked.

"I... I may have given him my phone number?"

"Why on earth would you do that?" Varian asked.

"Yeah, that's highly unusual superhero protocol." Fred agreed.

"Well... I thought since he's working with all these former super villains he might be a good source of information?" Honey Lemon lied.

All her friends stared at her blankly. She had decided not to tell them about the tv spot, afraid that they might not agree to it. So she made up a little white lie about getting a tip on a potential robbery. Hopefully once they were at the studio and Sparkles explained everything to them, they would agree then.... Hopefully.

"I don't trust it." Wasabi huff.

"I have to agree with Wasabi." Hiro said. "Knowing Sparkles it could be a trap."

Honey Lemon frowned as her hopes were dashed.

"Still..." Hiro thought, "We should probably look into any potential leads that we can given how both Sirque and Hardlight are at large."

"So are we going on a stake-out?" Fred excitedly gasped.

"Yes Fred, we're going on a stake-out. Everyone suit up."

"Woo-hoo!" Fred jumped for joy.

                                                 ----------------------

They arrived at studio eight early, only to find it abandoned.

As the heroes cautiously looked around the dark, empty building, Honey Lemon felt a lump dread in the pit of her stomach. They were twenty minutes early, but any busy tv studio still should have been crawling with people.

"We need to get out of here." She suddenly said.

"Why? We just got here." Hiro asked.

"I don't see anything here worth stealing though." Wasabi  said.

"No you don't understand, It's a trap-"

No sooner did the words leave her mouth then did something small, round, and metallic dropped from the ceiling. It landed right next to Baymax's foot. An electrical current zapped the poor robot, and he fell over without a sound.

"Baymax!" Hiro rushed over to his friend's side while the rest of the gang took up a defensive position.  They looked everywhere for their attacker but couldn't see them.

"Wait... does anyone else hear a hissing sound?" Fred asked.

Then a strange smell filled the room.

"Eww, what is that?" Gogo sniffed.

"Knockout gas!" Varian warned as he pressed his bandana close to his face.

He was too late. First Wasabi gave a yawn before fainting. Gogo caught him, but soon succumbed to the gas herself. One by one the heroes were all knocked out. Varian's bandana only served as a partial makeshift gas mask, and he too eventually fainted. The last thing he saw before going under was someone stepping out of the shadows wearing a tacky purple suit.

                                                 ----------------------

"Good Evening, San Fansokyo!"

The heroes awoke with a groan as Sparkles' loud voice pierced their ears.

Hiro blinked rapidly under the bright studio lights. He tried to move his arm to rub his eyes but found that he couldn't do so. That's when he noticed that he and his friends were all chained to the wall.

"What are you up to you little twerp?" Gogo grunt as she tried to break free.

"Tsk, tsk, tsk.. temper, temper!" Sparkles mocked. "You should smile more for the cameras; after all, you're on live tv."

"What are you talking about?" Wasabi demanded. He too couldn't break free from his bonds.

"Also what did you do to Bay- I mean Red Panda!?" Hiro added.

"Oh, your robot friend is fine." Sparkles dismissed. He snapped his fingers and a curtain pulled back revealing Baymax, strapped to a surgical table using heavy steel bands.

"Baymax!"

"Do not worry. I am undamaged." The robot calmly stated.

"Of course he is." Sparkles said. "We need all of Big Hero Six, or should I say, Big Hero Seven, present."

"Grrrah... You backstabbing liar! We had a deal!" Honey Lemon snapped.

"Wh-what deal?" Varian asked her.

"And I'm keeping my side of the bargain." Sparkles inisted, as he pulled a sparkly star sticker out of her sticker book and placed it on his cheek. "I've hijacked San Fansokyo's Tonight Show to broadcast this very special interview, all for you dear captive audience. Isn't that right Brutus?" He called up to his hulking minion who stood inside the sound booth.

"Broadcast is holding steady boss." The hired henchman said and gave him a thumbs up. "The folks at the station can't get past my security blocks."

"Honey? What did you do?" Gogo hissed at her friend.

"I may have hired Mr Sparkles to be my agent?" Honey Lemon nervously laughed.

"Why?" Hiro whined.

"He said he could help change my superhero name." She meekly explained.

"And you believed him!?" Wasabi screeched.

"I hate being tall 'Tall Girl', okay!?"

"But you are tall," Fred matter-of-factly stated.

She threw him a stern look.

"What?"

"It's okay, I think I got something to get us out of this." Varian ignored his friends' bickering and tried to pull out a mini-chimball with acid from his glove, only to find it was not there.

"Hey, my gear!?" He cried.

"Well duh..." Sparkles snorted, "I'm not dumb enough to let you have all your weapons. I even reinforced 'Red Panda's' constraints so that his super strength wouldn't be a problem. Now let's get on with the interview. Captain Cutie... So you and Lab Lady, huh? Is it true you two broke up? Is that why she went solo?

"She was never on the team." Hiro grunted. "Ugh! And we're not dating."

"Oooh, that sounds like a confession to me, doesn't it folks?" Mr. Sparkles placed his hand next to his ear, and Brutus played the recorded sound of an audience cheering. "That's right. So stay tuned dear viewers, we will be getting more juicy details after these messages."

                                                 ----------------------

Tadashi was finishing the final touches on his secret project when the tv he had been playing in the background suddenly changed channels. He looked up to find his friends captured and a short guy with pink hair prancing around in front of them.

"And we're back, baby!" The little imp said. "Captain Cutie was going to give us the low down on his rocky relationship with Lab Lady, but first, let's check in with my client, Princess Photon."

He then placed the microphone in front of Honey Lemon's face. She squeaked with joy.

"EEP! Princess Photon!? I love it!"

"I knew you would." the short guy winked.

"Honey!" Everyone yelled at her at once, and she recoiled under their angry stares.

Tadashi had seen enough. He flipped the tv off and gathered his gear.

"Well, I guess it's time to test the stuff out." He said to no one and then ran outside to his scooter.

                                                 ----------------------

"So Chop-Chop? Lizard Guy... " Sparkles slyly smiled. "Where's the honeymoon going to be?"

Wasabi sighed. "We're not get-"

"He mentioned wanting to go to Cancun," Fred interrupted.

This rewarded him with a frothing at the mouth Wasabi trying to break through his bonds to get at him.

"Don't say things like that! What if Sam is watching?"

"But you said it?" Fred wailed as he unsuccessfully tried to scoot away.

"Sam? Uh-oh, looks like there's trouble in paradise, people." Sparkles joked. "and speaking of love triangles, Speed Queen?"

"One word and you die." Gogo growled.

Sparkles ignored her.

"So, what's this thing going on between you, the Portal Pirate, and Princess Photon?"

"There is nothing!" She shouted. She tried to grab him but the restraints held her back.

Sparkled laughed, "Feisty, isn't she folks!? Maybe the Portal Pirate can end this debate once in for all for us."

He leaned close to Varian till they were almost nose to nose.

"Hey, Portal Pirate. It's been awhile, hasn't it?"

Varian made a face at him. Mr. Sparkles ignored it.

"Buddy to buddy, you can confide in me. Who is it that you're in love with?"

Varian refused to answer.

"Awe come on, give us the goods. The public wants to know. Who do you choose, Speed Queen, or Princess Photon?"

"Why should I tell you?" He asked.

Mr. Sparkles gave a wicked smile. "Because if you don't play along, I'll zap both girls with these." He pulled two of the flash grenades from his pocket. The same ones that he had used to take down Baymax earlier.

"What!?" Everyone else shouted.

"You're crazy!" Wasabi snapped.

"Where did you even get those?" Fred asked.

"I have connections." Sparkles replied.

"Oh my, those look very unsafe." Baymax said.

"You won't get away with this." Hiro warned, as he tried to squirm free.

"Alright! Enough chatter." Sparkles grew impatient. "You got ten seconds, Portal Pirate. Start talking."

He inched the microphone closer to Varian's face.

"I.. um... I love... uh.. I'm in love with Hon-"

Suddenly the lights cut out.

"Hey! Brutus!? What's going on up there!?" Sparkles demanded, but Brutus never answered.

Instead the bulky henchman let out a scream. Then suddenly he crashed through the window of the soundbooth and landed in front of the stage with a thud.

He must have not been too hurt, however, because he very quickly sat back up and started to frantically back away towards  the door.

"It-it's a g-g-ghost!" He shouted, before turning and running away.

"A ghost? There's no such thing as ghosts! Get back here!" Sparkles yelled, but Brutus was long gone.

"Oh, isn't there?" came a disembodied voice behind him.

Sparkles jumped. "Who's there? You can't fool me!"

The ghost just laughed.

"Wait.. I know that voice." Hiro whispered.

No one heard him as they all stared in shock as the chair that Sparkles had been using to host from started to float in midair.

Sparkles had to duck out of the way quickly as the chair was then thrown at him by an invisible being.

"Oh yeah!? Well let's see how ghost-like you are when you get electrocuted!" Sparkles yelled and started to throw the flash grenades around randomly.

The ghost only laughed again. His voice seemed to be coming from everywhere at once.

Then Hiro felt one of the restraints on his hand release.

But the victory was short lived when one of the grenades found its target.

"Ahh!" The fake ghost stumbled back from the shock and his suit short-circuited.

The figure slumped against the wall. He was dressed head to toe in black, like a ninja, and his face was obscured by a black biker's helmet.

Hiro got to work quickly to free himself from the last of his bonds.

"I knew you weren't a real ghost." Sparkles said as he stepped in front of the new wanna be superhero. He then pulled out his plastic squirt gun. "Why don't we find out who's behind that mask, shall we?"

The masked figure shook his head as he came to, and then dodged out of the way just in the nick of time as Sparkles shot a stream of acid at him. It ate away a hole in the wall where his head had only moments before been.

"Come on! Come on!" The super tried frantically to re-engage his cloaking suit as the clown gave chase.

He soon ran out of places to run, as Sparkles cornered him.

"Say goodbye to our adoring audience, because you just got canceled." The villain laughed at his own joke as he took aim once more.

Only to find himself engulfed in pink gelatinous slime before he could pull the trigger.

"What!?"

He turned his head as best as he could and found the rest of Big Hero Seven free, rearmed, and staring him down.

"Consider yourself fired." Honey Lemon said. She also waved in front of him the black folder. "And I'm taking my stickers back."

"Awwwe shoot!" Sparkles grumbled, as Varian opened up a portal back to HQ.

"Oh, and the police should be along shortly to pick you up." Hiro gloated.

And with that the heroes ran through the portal, including the newcomer.

                                                 ----------------------

"Okay, who's the new guy?" Wasabi asked once everyone was through.

"You reconfigured the chameleon suit, didn't you?" Hiro asked as he gave the masked figure a smug smile.

"Is it that obvious?" Tadashi asked as he removed the helmet.

Fred gasped. "Ah! I knew you couldn't keep away from superheroing! I knew it!"

Tadashi laughed as Fred kept bouncing around him. "Haha, okay, okay... yeah I've been working on my own suit for the past month. I wanted it to be a surprise."

"Well we were surprised alright." Gogo said.

"Yeah, but not as much as Mr. Sparkles." Varian snorted. "Did you see his face when you started laughing at him?"

Everyone had a good snicker at the thought. Everyone save for Honey Lemon, who sat down at the conference table and held her head in her hands.

"What's the matter, Princess Photon?" Hiro gently asked.

"I'm so sorry." Honey sobbed. "It's all my fault. I shouldn't have trusted him."

"Hey, no. It's not your fault that you were tricked." Wasabi said.

"Though it is your fault that you lied to everyone." Tadashi  said.

Everyone threw him a look.

"What?"

Varian came over and wrapped her in a hug. "It's okay. No one blames you."

"No, Tadashi's right." She sighed as she pulled away from the hug. "I'm sorry I wasn't honest with you guys. I was just so desperate not to have everyone call me Tall Girl any more."

"Awe, Honey, who cares if you're a Tall Girl to the rest of the world? You're Honey Lemon to all of us!" Fred cheered.

"And more importantly," Gogo added as she gently squeezed her shoulder, "There's nothing wrong with being tall."

Honey Lemon gave her friends a small smile. "Thanks guys…Group Hug!"

                                                 ----------------------

Honey Lemon burst into HQ waving a new paper around. "Guys! Guys! It worked! It actually worked! Look!"

She shoved the paper into Hiro's face.

"Princess Photon's Perilous Predicament: Mr. Sparkles confesses to con-job." He read in confusion.

"See!? They got my name right!" She gave him a crazed smile as she pointed at the headline.

"Honey, did you not learn anything from this?" Wasabi asked her.

"Only that I need a better costume change." She replied.

Fred took the newspaper from her. "Hey, look, you made into the news too Tadashi!"

Tadashi peered at the blurry photograph. "Who is 'The Ghost'? The Ghost... Ah, I like it."

"Well you may not like this as much." Varian said as he handed him one of the tabloid magazines.

'Newcomer causes trouble in paradise. The break up of Speed Queen and Portal Pirate. Exclusive inside information from an anonymous source.' it read, and the picture below it was a badly photoshopped image of Tadashi and Varian in their supersuits with a heart painted around them.

"Oh that's all kinds of wrong." Tadashi bemoaned.

"Tell me about it. I preferred it when people were shipping with Fred.Blagh!" Varian agreed.

"Now you know how I feel." Gogo smugly pointed out, as she leaned back in her seat.

"Babe. You didn't."

Gogo didn't answer, but the satisfied smile never left her face.

"Hey, look on the brightside," Fred said as he held up his cell. "At least you get a rad ship name out of it, GhostPirate!"

[madeyoumyvillain]

You were baited and fooled by Bardugo. How did she do that exactly? I want to hear the rant you probably have for it

There is no rant,I've gotten past it at this point. Shadow and Bone was marketed as an enemies to lovers story and we all know how that ended. If Leigh wanted us to NOT ship Darklina and root for the friends to lovers fighting for the greater good and defeating evil,I wouldn't have said anything. I don't think many people would ship Darklina if that was the case. But it's not. Yes,yk what,there is a rant.

And not just Leigh,many authors know that ETL arc is widely popular and loved so they start off their books or market them as ETL to grab the attention of the vast majority of its lovers,but it ends up being either friends to lovers or something entirely different. If she didn't want us to ship it,maybe she shouldn't have baited us? Why would you use "a dark heart,a pure soul,a love that will last forever" as a tag line when you plan on ending that ship and completely changing it? Maybe try promoting your actual hero and ship if you want the readers to NOT ship the wrong couple? Why would you talk about The Darkling and NOT about Malyen if he's the actual love interest,the good guy,the hero?

Leigh Bardugo hates The Darkling,hates us for liking him and has mentioned in KoS how we're a cult of crazy people for liking Aleksander. If she didn't want us to like him then maybe she shouldn't have written him as someone with ACTUAL motives while th good guys are fighting only because it's The Right Thing ™ to do while doing NOTHING about the actual problem and fucking off into the sunset to fulfill cottagecore dreams?

Picking sides in YOUR OWN fandom is the worst,most immature thing you can do. She recently opened up about how The Darkling embodies her abusive ex. Therefore,Darklina is abusive and we're abuse apologists for shipping it. Let me remind you that Bardugo herself forgets that Darklina isn't the main relationship,Malina is. And Malina is the exact kind of toxic relationship you find in real life. Malyen embodies toxic masculinity. So maybe while trying to make Darklina toxic,she forgot she was making Malina toxic too? It's not a competition for less or more,if you're abusive,you're abusive. Less or more doesn't matter,there's no better alternative of being abused. If she wanted us to believe that Alina is a strong,fierce and independent woman who makes her own decisions and doesn't need anyone, if she really wanted us young girls who are stupid and naive to never let a man hold us back then letting Alina end up alone would be the best thing she could do. Because neither of those men deserved Alina.

She has openly called Darkling stans disturbed and said that she wrote him as a lesson for younger girls to not excuse evil men just because they have slick hair and sharp jawline haha. I shouldn't be angry at her for shoving a FTL down my throat when she advertised a Light/Dark romance because she it did for ME so a hot and evil and charismatic man doesn't end up taking advantage of the stupid and naive girl I am. I should thank her for teaching me that I'm a young and dumb girl ready to be taken advantage of by evil, hot,dark, centuries old shadow summoners. Too bad I haven't found one yet:/

Look at these pictures and tell me where the fuck did she talk about her main,endgame ship and tell me if this isn't bait or not.

But no,I'm an absolute fool. A villain romanticizer. An abuse apologist. A pedophile and war criminal enabler in her eyes. I'm someone who hasn't been through anything traumatic in my entire life according to the antis when it's actually LB and them who can't differentiate between fiction and reality. It's LB who is one of the antis and shames fans of her own characters.

So yes,she is a baiter. She did fool us. And she keeps on dragging Aleksander's bloody corpse through the mud to milk money because she knows that alot of people in the GV fandom love him and expected a redemption arc for him. She uses him time and time again to hurt us. She's always treated Darkling Stans like shit. Always tried to make us feel wrong or morally corrupt for liking him. Tell me,how am I supposed to like this behaviour and why exactly should I respect someone who shames me for liking something that doesn't exist?

[tragicbeauty1991]

You know what makes me sad? Looking back at books/movies/tv shows I haven’t seen in awhile and seeing some of the relationships that I shipped (canon or not) and realizing now as an adult how unhealthy and toxic they were. And I see it all the time in new media, too. There are couples who the writers clearly want to show as being romantic and passionate when really their constant bickering and one or both partners making stupid choices repeatedly indicate that they absolutely aren’t good for each other. I’m not necessarily thinking of one specific pairing, and of course, fiction isn’t reality and people are allowed to ship what they want. And in fanfic sometimes the relationships are written in a way where they are healthier than they are on-screen but it just bothers me that a lot of younger audience members don’t know that what they’re seeing play out isn’t normal in a real-life healthy, mature relationship. Of course people (and characters) make mistakes. But they should grow from those mistakes, not go back to the same old vices. I think tv shows are especially prone to this issue because they often need a “big bad” and so drag their feet when they have a villain go through a redemption arc and fall in love with a hero. But when a person makes the same bad choices over and over and over again throughout several seasons…they aren’t really sorry. There are some characters and pairings I really want to like but just can’t because I can’t get past how toxic the relationship is.

I guess what I’m saying is two things: (1) Don’t immediately jump on younger members of a fandom for shipping something unhealthy. They may not even recognize that it’s not a healthy relationship. (2) If you are a younger member of a fandom, learn what IS healthy and what isn’t in real life. If you want to ship something fictional that isn’t healthy, that’s okay. But don’t let yourself get into a real relationship thinking that arguing all the time or someone constantly going back on their word is acceptable. It’s not normal. It’s narcissistic abuse, and you can absolutely love and forgive someone and still choose to walk away from them for the sake of your own mental health. I had to learn that the hard way.

[fandom-necromancer]

A match in stubbornness

This was prompted by the amazing @smolandangry001! Enjoy some fluff!

Fandom: Detroit become human Ship: Reed900 Warnings: None

‘You will regret that, you stupid phcking pig!’ Gavin rolled his eyes at the handcuffed man he pushed into the back of the car. ‘Listen buddy, I regret most decisions, I’ve made. But certainly not this one. Now shut up and enjoy the ride.’ He yawned, once again tired exhausted from not getting enough sleep today. He turned to see if Nines wanted to drive but met his intense, upset stare. ‘What’s wrong, tin-can?’ ‘You know what’s wrong’, he grumbled, walking around the car and opening the door. ‘No, I don’t.’

Nines had sat down and closed the door, so Gavin joined him on the passenger-seat. Nines looked out for oncoming traffic, then carefully drove off. ‘You know very well, I don’t like it, when you do that.’ ‘What?’ ‘Your self-depreciating jokes.’ Gavin groaned. ‘Really? That talk in front of that dipshit in the back?’ ‘You asked’, Nines shrugged, eyes on the road. ‘You know it affects your mental health. Humans have the tendency to sub-consciously believe whatever has been repeated the most. You are actively diminishing your sense of self-worth.’ ‘Nines, humans also have the tendencies to cope by using humour.’ ‘Then maybe you should start being funny.’ ‘Wow, someone’s pissed…’ Gavin snuffled and turned to the window.

‘I’m not… pissed’, Nines spoke up at the next red-light and turned to him. ‘I’m just… Gavin, you are a remarkably intelligent person and I doubt anything you truly regret you could have changed. Sometimes causality escapes our grasp.’ ‘Phck, Nines, I know I was unlucky! It’s a saying. Get a grip! It’s nothing big, just a phrase. Now shut up, this is embarrassing. Besides, you tried it countless times already but never managed to change me.’ ‘I don’t want to change-‘ ‘Stop it. You want. Don’t lie to me.’

Nines sighed and got back to driving them to the precinct. Arguing with Gavin rarely lead to anything substantial and he believed in this case it wouldn’t be too different. He didn’t want him to change. He just wanted him to see what he was seeing. Nines just hated it when Gavin made these comments about himself. And he wasn’t the most advanced unit ever created if he would give up just because words didn’t work.

-

The drive home after work was a quiet one, them both listening to music, but feeling the uncomfortable atmosphere hanging in the air. Still, it took them until they had actually reached their flat that Nines asked: ‘Are you angry with me?’ Gavin flinched and straightened his back. ‘What?’ ‘Are you angry with me? Because of today?’ The human sighed. ‘Nines, phck… No. No, I’m not angry, today, just like every other day, just wasn’t my day.’ He let himself fall on the sofa and Nines followed, lightly placing his hands on his shoulders. Slowly he dragged them upwards until his fingers were buried in Gavin’s hair and gently scraped over his scalp. A pleased hum was his thanks as he continued the slow movements. ‘I think, just like every other day, you were quite remarkable.’ Nines saw the frown on his face and placed a single finger on his lips even before Gavin could disagree. ‘Shhh. Don’t talk. You were the one who found out our suspect was still at the scene. Without you he would have run free.’

He retracted his finger to brush it across the man’s lower jaw and go deeper with his hands to massage his neck. ‘Someone else could have found him.’ ‘But someone else didn’t’, Nines reminded him, fully concentrated on his newest mission. ‘And now shut up and enjoy. ‘Every day you surprise me anew. Your thoughts are fascinating to me. Everyday you show me why I love you. Everyday I find another facete of you to adore.’

Gavin smiled, eyes long closed bathing in the attention. ‘And I always wonder how you can get even sappier every night. I don’t deserve you.’ ‘You deserve everything you can imagine and more’, the android disagreed, pressing a kiss to his forehead while letting his hands run deeper to his shoulders and upper back. Gavin obediently turned around to give him better access to his sore muscles. ‘Bullshit, I’m trash and you are the tin-can that takes care of me.’ Nines might have squeezed a little harder at this. ‘Gavin…’ ‘What? Can’t get used to this much sweet-talk now, can I?’ ‘Why?’, the android asked. ‘Think you ever get rid of me?’ ‘So far my shitty personality was a pretty good way to stay single.’

‘Gavin, you are an amazing person, you just don’t let people close to you easily. I’m honoured to see you as you are.’ The man grumbled something incomprehensible into the cushions. ‘Gavin, I thoroughly hope you simply agreed to me just now.’ Gavin turned around and grabbed his hands. ‘I love you’, he repeated. ‘Even though you are wrong.’

‘I’m the superior machine. I’m always right.’ ‘I know.’ Nines counted that as a win, even if they still had a long way to go. But a RK always accomplished it’s mission and he was ready to prove that again and again. ‘I love you, too. Enough for both of us.’

[goodlucktai]

61 or 75 for sanji?? i swear just a single op fic from you throws me headfirst back into that fandom

PROMPTS LIST

75. “What are you doing?” “…Eating.” “We’re being held hostage and you decide to raid the kitchen?” “They didn’t say the fridge was off limits.”

x

If he’s anything, he’s annoyed. He’s also just self-aware enough to admit that it’s probably not the correct reaction to have in this situation. At least he’s not the only one.

“Are they for real?” Usopp whispers on his left. He sounds as disgruntled as Sanji feels, which is ridiculously validating.

“Unfortunately, they appear to be.”

“Hey, you two!” one of the Marines snaps, pointing a gun at them. “Stop talking!”

“Or what?” Usopp calls back. It’s less of a taunt and more of a genuine question.

The Marines clearly don’t know how to answer, because they glance between each other for a moment, and then the first guy waves his gun some more.

“Or we make you stop talking,” he menaces. Sanji thinks this must be his first day on the job. God, what an unlucky bastard.

“Hey,” Nami snaps suddenly. “Don’t even think about going in there.”

Her voice is venomous enough that the Navy soldier who had been about to open the door into the girls’ living quarters actually snatches his hand away, as though the handle burned him.

“This is a lot of trouble to go through for a favor,” Sanji grits out.

“I know,” Nami replies. “I’m beginning to think maybe it’s too much trouble.”

Coby had begged them, begged them, on his knees, not to cause any more trouble. The Straw Hats had helped him drag in a dangerous man, and subsequently saved a lot of lives on the island.

Not out of any moral obligation or altruism on their part-- they are pirates, after all-- but the guy was an asshole.

The captain of the Naval base operating here had agreed to let them go on their way, out of what Sanji is pretty sure was one part sincere gratitude and two parts absolute certainty that there would be no way to detain them even if he wanted to.

At that point, though, a skirmish had already started.

“Please, please, please, Luffy-san,” Coby had pleaded, hands clasped in front of him, Helmeppo lingering nervously at his shoulder. “Just this one time? As a favor?”

“Ugh,” Luffy replied in clear distaste, more at the sight of his friend groveling on his knees than at the concept of playing nice with some Marines.

“Was that a yes?” Coby sprang to his feet, smiling widely. “I’m taking it as a yes! Thank you! Now please come with me to get Zoro-san before he does any more damage!”

He seized Luffy’s hand and dragged him down the gangplank. Clutching his hat to his head with his free hand before it could fly off, Luffy called over his shoulder, “Let’s do what Coby wants for now, even though it’s stupid!” and that was that.

So the crew split into two groups, one to retrieve their erstwhile first mate before he sank the entire island out of spite, and one to maintain friendly airs on the ship in the meantime. Luffy led the Zoro squad, because of course he did, Carrot bouncing along at his side. Franky, Brook and Chopper went along because their appearances make small-minded assholes nervous, which hurts their feelings, which in turn makes the rest of their nakama angry, and it devolves into a whole thing. Jimbei and Robin went, too, because it seemed more likely that Luffy’s situation would be the one to spiral into chaos, given that’s what Luffy Situations just do.

So that’s how they ended up here, Sanji, Usopp, and Nami left to play mediators. But it had barely been twenty minutes and already their tempers were fraying. At times like this, Sanji desperately wished Vivi were here. She could convince anyone of anything, while simultaneously making them feel guilty for not thinking of it on their own.

“The captain said we were letting them go,” one of the soldiers is saying nervously to the others. His gun is in his hand, but held down and to the side, unlike the other dozen.

“Are you fucking kidding? They’re worth billions.”

“But Straw Hat-- ”

“He won’t do anything as long as we’ve got these three captive.”

Nami twitches. She’s visibly clinging to the last shred of her patience now.

So they’ve gone rogue, Sanji thinks with distaste. All for some quick gold.

He leans back against the wall beside the tree, its shade a cool respite from the blistering summer sun. He can still vaguely remember who he was in East Blue, how he lived there; if a squad of soldiers had come into his home and pointed their guns at him back then, it would have been, at the very least, cause for some alarm.

But that was practically a lifetime ago. It’s just annoying now.

There’s a creak of footsteps, and Sanji glances up to find Usopp wandering toward the galley door.

“What are you doing?” Nami asks.

“Getting something to eat,” Usopp replies.

“We’re being held hostage and you decide to go raid the kitchen?”

“They didn’t say the fridge was off-limits.”

Sanji tilts his head, considering him. At the same-time, one of the Marines-- the loudest one-- says, “Quit moving around, for fuck’s sake. Just sit there or we’ll start shooting.”

“So start shooting,” Usopp grumbles, “at least then something interesting would happen.”

He’s their sniper, and he was the best at what he did even two years ago, but he would give Benn Beckman a run for his money now. If he wanted to, he could have taken these guys out by himself, within about ten seconds. But he still subsides, because Luffy asked them to go along with this stupid farce. For whatever reason, Coby is important to him. And that means Coby is important to all of them.

Coby is not, however, more important than--

“Are you hungry?” Sanji asks.

“Kind of,” Usopp says, in a way that actually means ‘yes.’ He shuffles a bit, hesitating. It’s been a long, hard road getting him back into the habit of normal meals after two years of extremely unhealthy eating behaviors, from one extreme to the other. Finally, he says, “We had to skip lunch.”

So they did. Sanji can feel himself coming alert, now. Something important is rearing its head inside him. He straightens from his irreverent lean and says, “In the mood for anything in particular?”

Usopp blinks at him, not following. Nami sighs but her expression is one of fondness.

“He’s like a dog with a bone,” she says, bumping Usopp’s shoulder with hers. “Might as well pick something.”

Usopp cracks a smile and opens his mouth, and then a gun goes off. Sanji is in front of Nami and Usopp before he even registers moving, both of his friends behind the shelter of his own body. He’s staring at the smoking muzzle of the pistol, aimed upwards instead of at his nakama, which is the only reason the man holding it is still alive. The bullet blew a whole through their painted mainsail, and the wind is whistling through the ripped canvas noisily.

Nami and Usopp grumble and nudge their way out from behind Sanji, standing one at each side of him instead. The soldier with the gun says, “Your posters say Dead or Alive, you know. You want to keep pressing your luck, or do you want to sit down and-- ”

Sanji kicks him in the face hard enough that something breaks beneath his heel. It’s all chaos after that.

Much later, Coby’s expression is one of absolute horror when he takes in the scene.

The Straw Hats, in turn, don’t miss a beat; stepping over the strewn bodies, drifting as a cohesive unit towards the sandwich station Sanji has set up to tide them over while a big pot of beef burgundy simmers in the kitchen.

Luffy looks around at the mess and says, “What happened?”

“It wasn’t our fault, captain. They shot at us,” Nami says right away, pointing up at the ripped sail as proof. She’s sipping a mimosa, reclining on a lounge chair, not a hair out of place when she adds, “We had to defend ourselves.”

Usopp has half a sandwich left on his plate, thick slices of roast beef dripping with caramelized onions and horseradish sauce, stacked between slabs of toasted rye bread. It’s entirely possible that Sanji went overboard. Usopp holds the second half out to Luffy as the other boy drifts over.

Luffy takes it and sits cross-legged on the grassy deck beside him, close enough that their knees and elbows bump companionably.

“So they deserved it, then,” he tells Coby, extremely judgemental. “Your people should listen to you better.”

Sanji smiles, hiding it behind his hand as he lights another cigarette.

[straighttma]

cw: fucking awful tropes such as homophobia, fatphobia, all the bad tropes man, I’m so sorry

The Magnus Archives is too fancy a name for Moldy Pencil’s het dudebro target audience, so instead it’s something simple and kinda stupid like Fearhunter, because oh yeah instead of exploring the fucked up implications of monster hunters who murder things for a living, this is now a monster of the week show, JoHn is an avatar of The Hunt who’s parents were killed by Jude (and there’s gross emphasis on it being in part because Jude is a lesbian, yay representation) So now Jon works for an underground network of hunters (who aren’t viscous monsters because the hunt is the only moral entity!) including Martin, who instead of sasha, is the computer guy, and also the token fat comedy relief character, Sasha is the sexy love interest who can fight because she had 7 brothers, but seems to always be the one who needs saving by JoHn, and Tim is JoHn’s cousin or something but the fans ignore it and JoHnTim is the most popular ship in the fandom, oh yeah the fandom, Moldy Pencil was aiming for middle aged men but instead got a fanbase of queer teenagers, and a few seasons in they start openly making fun of the fandom within the actual show with gay jokes (yay) and because this show has no nuance the big big bad is Elias but instead of Jon working for him, he’s the king of the monsters, and probably gay coded, probably makes a joke about wanting to do it with JoHn, to his het dismay. JoHn is a manly man man who sleeps with every woman that ever shows up, and dies many many many times and always comes back, after s3 we’re introduced to Oliver Banks (and he’s probably “deathly pale” in this version bc poc protagonists on this kinda show are a rare find) instead of the nuance of the end, he’s a grim reaper who can raise the dead, and saves JoHn because “life and death have big plans for him” and JoHniver immediately becomes the most popular ship and the producers drag out a will they won’t they over 11 seasons in which the world almost ends every other season, and at the very end Oliver confesses his love to JoHn and immediately goes to super mega ultra hell for being a homo, only for JoHn to die of tetanus one week later, oh and Tim has a slaughter arc in the first few seasons and then it’s never brought up again. This has been an obvious dis on supernatural with a blend of other shitty tropes, I hope you hated reading this as much as I hated writing this

Tbh OP sometimes I just skim and when I hit my limit i just hit queue