#i’m actually going to start yelling
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guys i’m not doing ok
#i’m actually going to start yelling#he looks SO pretty with the purple. and he’s a UNIT in the sweater like ok king we get it you’ve been working out#and the chains leather pants boots really just. reminding me that he CAN dress#absolutely breathtaking#chris motionless#miw#motionless in white#she speaks
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One of the more absolutely !!!! images I have in my head from Gold Cages is I mean okay what eventually happens to the Chieftain Magnus who Sauron had to ‘rescue’ (I mean he did but also) Galadriel, Elrond and Celebrimbor from being his slaves and like guy is garbage but just.
(Also the ‘he has all four of them arranged around him as he sits upon his throne’ is An Image. Also the time(s) he invaded Finrods mind).
@plotdesigner @conundrumoftime @themalhambird @nocompromise-noregrets
#actually the way he absolutely started out with ‘I’m going to fuck with Celeborn for touching my lady’#and ends with ‘MINE AS WELL’ is uh A Journey#au: golden cage#fic#lils fic wishlist#i am on day seven of no sleep without nightmares at this point my brain will yell at me so I’m just like Posting Stuff#*anyway
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Wait, what happened? I can't watch streams nor vods so I'm a bit lost here--
In her last stream Shubble talked in depth about an abusive ex. She did not say any specific names but based off the behaviors and tidbits she mentioned about that person has ME thinking of a specific name. I won’t say who because I’m not trying to start shit and spread rumors, You’ll have to watch the vod and come to your own conclusion.
What matters right now though is Shubble. Please send her lots of love and support. She deserves the world
#rozu asks#anonymous#I don’t think it’s wise to start pointing fingers#my brain is an overthinking mess and I needed to yell somewhere#so I might actually go delete that sorry#I’m freaking out and assuming things but I don’t want others to do the same
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I FUCKING KNEW IT. I FUCKING KNEW IT WE WERE ABOUT TO GET A SHERLOCK’S BIRTHDAY EPISODE. I’VE LITERALLY POSTED ABOUT IT YESTERDAY I’M A FUCKING GENIUS
#sherlock and co#please excuse me#I’m deeply sorry for my behavior#I’m just SO EXCITED#I’ve made a post LITERALLY YESTERDAY wondering if the next episode will contain sherlock’s birthday#considering bbc!sherlock was born on 6th of January I think#I actually started screaming when sherlock said it’s his birthday#and just went on Tumblr in a speed of light to yell to you guys#and normally I wait till the end of episode before checking Tumblr to avoid spoilers#oh fuck me what is this podcast even doing to me I’m going insane#john watson#sherlock#sherlock holmes#goalhanger podcasts#goalhanger
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love love loveeee getting bitched at at 7am bc she’s pissed off at her game.
#like don’t fucking take it out on me#I mentioned one thing and she started getting bitchy and then yelled at me over nothing#I was actually in a good mood for once and now it’s absolutely shot#so I’m going to bed before I fucking kill myselfself because I hate life and hate living in this god forsaken house#⛧ diary entry ⛧
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I hate men and their need to act like any emotional reactions you have while you’re on your period is just you being “hormonal” and “not yourself”
(Rant in tags)
#like sorry I’m actually defending myself rather than just letting you talk shit about me directly infront of me??#when I’m on my period I tend to show more of my real emotions rather than what people want to see so yeah#but the conversation I was having with my brother was fine- I wasn’t talking to him in any way#he asked me about the monster that I had because like an hour or two ago he asked me not to throw it away since it’s one with the cod#qr code thing on it and he asked me if I threw it away and I said “no it’s not empty right now it’s infront of the microwave” and right#after my dad jumps in saying nobody needs to take offense to how I’m talking or how I’m being? when I didn’t say anything in any way? like#my brother didn’t even have the time to respond to me before he jumped in and started indirectly talking shit#I’m so done right now- all he’s done the last few days is nit pick at me about stupid shit like yesterday we missed the our bus stop and we#get off and this man starts yelling at me that now he doesn’t get to eat (mind you he never explicitly said he wanted to get off at that#stop I thought we were just going directly home)- he constantly says shit on purpose to get a rise out of me and now for some reason my#brother (the one that is 17) has been budding in and telling me to stfu and all this shit and my dad feeds off it and uses it as more of a#reason to justify how he’s treating me and it’s just so upsetting cause he does know I’m in a more vulnerable time right now since my period#is always really difficult anyways really sorry for the rant don’t have any friends I can talk to irl about any of this so to the internet#it goes 🙃#random0lover emotional dumps#random0lover rambling ♡
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fuck i really am a perfectionist FUCK
#i’ll just be sitting there thinking some shit like i wish i could find the Ideal Way to do Everything surely it can’t be that hard surely if#i just keep trying different things different self-imposed systems surely i’ll find one that will get me to do everything- ah lads#AH LADS NOT AGAIN!!!!#good that i’ve started noticing though#before i’d just have the thought#now i can actually realize when i have a thought that boils down to ‘if i try hard enough i can become perfect’#coughs. coughs very discreetly and awkwardly.#i will still keep trying to be the best person best musician i can but. how do i separate that from perfectionism? how do I JUST GO HOW DO#JUST LIVE?#computer search how to become a perfect being. i mean computer search how to become able to function on command#rather than forcing myself to do things#even if it’s. IM GONNA FUCKING SCREAM this is just like when i yelled at my friend in the practice rooms#i love her and we have good conversations but i think there we reached a point where we really couldn’t help each other anymore#not like in GENERAL just in that. i have my problems and I FUCKING KNOW what they are but. i don’t know! it’s just not art fucking easy!#why is it not fucking easy it should be fucking easy! why am i scared of everything!#is everyone scared of everything??????#I NEED A THERAPIST MOMENT NUMBER FIVE THOUSAND#i might not even need a therapist though maybe i’m just fucking growing up#BUT I’D LIKE TO NOT HAVE AN UNDERCURRENT OF FEAR ON ALMOST EVERY TIME#not every time i’ve gotten better but it creeps back like the water and im like oh you and then i#can’t pull the stopper why can’t i pull the FUCKIN stopper it’s right there it’d be so easy and#nothing repels me except something mysterious some the water the water repels me#just by being there the water will not harm me it will not affect me in any way and i know this and i fear the water#should i write a fuckin poem. lmfao.
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Singlets stop talking about systems as if you’re an expert because you follow some on tumblr challenge (also warning the tags here are a huge rant so feel free to ignore that)
#first off I think most syscourse is stupid#at the end of the day you’re just arguing with strangers on the internet who probably aren’t going to change their opinion on anything#you’re not going to do anything but make yourself upset and waste you’re time#if someone’s spreading misinfo and they refuse to listen when corrected (assuming you’re actually trying to be helpful instead of just#yelling at them for being wrong because if someone did that to me I wouldn’t listen either) just block and move on#anyway to get the point of this post#I’m in a discord server with this one person and I can’t even remember why or how the topic of syscourse came up (it’s a fandom server)#and this person (a singlet) starts going on a rant about how having x belief about systems is inherently ableist and you shouldn’t trust#anyone who believes that#and it’s like you don’t even have the disorder you don’t have the lives experience to be able to talk on these things#like I guess have an opinion sure but don’t go around telling people (mostly other singlets) what is and isn’t right about a disorder that#your only info on is from people on tumblr#and I didn’t say anything about it because this server is really good for finding places to watch/listen to hard to find or expensive media#and I just didn’t want to fucking deal with it but like if you’re a singlet don’t go around telling people what they should believe about#systems or how cdds work especially when you’re not an expert and you haven’t done actual research into the subject#(also I’m purposely not saying the specifics of what was being said because I don’t want to deal with anyone seeing this and wanting to#argue about those specifics because as I’ve said before arguing about system stuff on the internet is largely pointless)#system#syscourse
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Oh my pretty little trophy you know if hung you down and kidnap you to keep you as a pet. I’d look after you real good so you’re always ready for me to use.
#then I’d really be your trophy 🫣#the thought of someone actually hunting me down has me weak in the knees#guys it’s HILARIOUS how easy id be to catch#if you want somewhat of a challenge give me a little head start#cause uh#maybe if my adrenaline was pumping it would be different#but usually I’m really good at sprinting but after a little bit I’m fucking done man#also can’t climb a tree (sad I never did as a kid ☹️)#when I think of someone hunting me down in the woods or something#I feel like I’d sprint off in some random direction#maybe running into a tree or tripping on some shit#and then not even 5 min will go by and I’ll hear you behind me or see you#and I’ll just like lol yell#or like freak out#grab some sort of twig for defense#knowing damn well that ain’t gonna do shit#or I’ll try to keep running but I feel like my anxiety and adrenaline would not mix well and I’d fall or something#and just be so so so easy to catch#you’ll be able to jump right on top of me and pin me down#or when I get up it’ll be so so easy to grab me and push me against a tree and tear off my clothes#gotta claim me by forced breeding before you kidnap me#okkkkkkkkkkk#I need to calm down wtf#ask#anon
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jfc i hate my mother
#my alarm doesn’t go off and i’m already stressed and trying to get ready#and she starts screaming at me to get in the car and we have to go right now when i’m literally in the middle of getting dressed#like um actually i cant just leave in a bra that’s a problem#and then she insists she’s trying to help me and so i told her ill fucking walk cause her yelling is the opposite of helpful#personal.txt
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beating back all these trigun fic ideas with a comically large stick
#whiskey yelling into the void#I DON’T HAVE TIME FOR ALL OF THEM!!!!!#ok ok. my post trimax fic i think might be like 10-20 chapters at most and idk if i’ll even finish he psot 98 fic tbh#i’m at ch 2 for the 98 one and i am losing steam already#part of me rly rly wants to go full steam ahead with the trimax fic but idk how far i’ll actually get??? bc i’m already hitting a block#and i’m still on ch 1#but also what if i wrote a modern day college au. what then#or a trigun polycule road trip fic that’s bene occupying my brain for the past day#shaking my brain MAKE UP YOUR MIND!!!!!#i’ll just focus on dreamstuck until i can decide what trigun fic to put my whole chest into#bc i already know i cannot start and finish all of them i will give up and lose interest eventually on a good chunk of them
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My prediction for this weekend is that we will be Pulling up to the Mom’s Side Of The Family party (which my mom is unable to attend bc she’s SICK) and I am very visibly the most unhinged there. I then get questioned relentlessly by my extended family who all live in rural upstate ny about my identity before making my cousins take me to find deer shed while I talk obsessively about Hannibal
#turtledove yells into the abyss#I’m actually rlly sad my mom can’t make it to the party#We literally arranged to go to dinner in her hometown tmmr :(#Like it’s still great to be back here but :(#Also this is the first time I’ve resolved that fuck it I know I’ve got queerphobic family members but I DONT CARE#They can be shitty to me all they want they don’t have much time left on this planet they’re OLD. I’m NOT. And also I’m crazier than them#If they pull shit I’ll just start talking about the romance of cannibalism. Fuck are they gonna do? Stop me?
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Okay aaaand someone stole my sandwich from the break room fridge I really am just gonna fucking lose it
#I can feel a scream sobbing mental breakdown coming on but I need it to hold off until about 11 pm#after I’ve gotten off and gone to an atm to get cash for laundry#once I’m in my apartment I can start screaming while I clean up a week’s worth of dishes and trash#so help me god if I go to the dmv tomorrow with every piece of paper work the dealership gave me AND their website pulled up saying what#documents I need as proof I have the right shit and they’re still difficult#I might actually finally well and truly snap and do something that ends with me having an arrest warrant#but ya know#I’m fine#just trying not to lose it and start yelling at some random coworker for daring to chat with me rn#kaz rambles
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hillary won the popular vote and still was not president lmao. idk why y’all keep forgetting this.
kamala is presently repeating the dems’ 2016 ‘strategy’ of catering to right wingers and ‘never trump’ republicans while completely abandoning progressives. she is priding herself on being further right on issues like immigration than trump. don’t be shocked pikachu face when it doesn’t work for dems this time just like it didn’t work for them last time.
the choice is not between “a Black woman and a white supremacist.” the choice is between a white supremacist and a while supremacist. stop saying “Black woman” about kamala as if that’s any meaningful distinction when she is just as much an active, gleeful agent of white supremacy as any white person in her position. the fact that you can agree that yes, having a white supremacist president is “the worst possible outcome” and then happily vote for a white supremacist just because she happens to not herself be white is ridiculous. you don’t actually care about white supremacy.
you all tried the “push biden/dems left”thing four years ago (and for the past several elections). this has Not worked out.
people aren’t voting for Kamala because SHE IS COMMITTING GENOCIDE. she is actively, happily committing genocide. she has over and over again shown how happy she is to continue committing genocide. she has over and over again shown she has no intentions to stop continuing to commit genocide. and why should she, when you all have gladly and readily (since the start of the genocide over a year ago) been yelling about how you’ll vote for any dem no matter what? no matter how many people they gleefully slaughter?
kamala and the democrats would rather lose the election than stop committing genocide. multiple polls have shown that calling for an arms embargo and a ceasefire would be enough to guarantee their win in necessary swing states. they would rather continue to burn palestinian children alive and carpet bomb hospitals than win the election. they have very clearly and unequivocally decided that losing the election is not as important to them as continuing to commit genocide. if they do not care enough about winning to do the single thing that the majority of their party voters (hell, the majority of all voters in the US) want (you know, the responsibility of a democratically elected entity — to respond to the wishes of the majority they represent), then why should i care about them winning? what makes you think that a party which actively refuses to listen to the majority of its constituents in order to continue slaughtering civilians is going to listen to you on Anything? on climate, COVID, immigration, anything? why do you trust the people committing genocide to ‘defend’ any sorts of rights?
this party cares more about slaughtering brown people than it does about any responsibilities it has to you as the people who vote for it. why the fuck should i care about them?
vote for whoever the fuck you want, but stop pretending you’re doing anyone, especially palestinians, any favors.
white liberals are a poison.
due to systemic oppression, usamerican leftists don't currently have the political power to instate a leftist president. we do, however, have enough power to make one of two candidates lose the election. we could use this power to make the white supremacist lose to the black woman, or we could use it to make the black woman lose to the white supremacist. the obvious choice for leftists would be to prioritize making the white supremacist lose, but tumblr users have devised a loop hole, where they agitate primarily for making the black woman lose, but omit the detail about who she would be losing to. this makes their stance more palatable to people who correctly believe that having a white supremacist president would be the worst possible outcome.
#palestine#israel#genocide#liberal#kamala harris#us politics#politics#im so tired of y’all. brown people are not an acceptable sacrifice for your rights*#*and the dems aren’t going to protect your rights anyway.#i’m sorry that i don’t believe the hundreds of thousands of dead palestinians are the price that i get to pay to maintain my sense of#perceived comfort and normalcy.#quasartalks#y’all are tiring. vote for the genocidaire if you want to but stop yelling at the people who actually have a stake in the multiple ongoing#genocides to continue to hand you the keys to our deaths.#every white person in these notes going ‘vote blue like your lives depend on it!!!!!1!1!’ u are the most out of touch condescending#piece of shit alive. do the 300000+ dead palestinians’ lives not depend on this. do the Black people who are being slaughtered by the polic#that the dems gladly fund not count. our (Black & brown) lives have ALWAYS BEEN IN DANGER from YOU. and your favorite violent girlboss#‘vote like your lives depend on it’ -said by someone who only recently has had to actually consider their life being threatened by politics#be so for fucking real. our lives have always depended on this. you only just started caring about your own.#democrats are happy to keep killing us while you vote like ‘your life’ depends on it. forgive us for not voting for our murderers.
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