#i’ll probably never finish it but i’ll leave a tag here because i actually love the name

[regulusdays]

wdym to write a fic i have to actually write it? like put words togerher? not just create playlists and random plot explanations on a doc? i have to write it write it??? who decided that??? it’s so unfair?!?!

[sunshinedeekay]

The Craving (DK’s version) || lsm.

pairing: dk x gn!reader

genre: tooth-rotting fluff

warnings: tbh none. just some kissing n hugging n stuff. slight cursing but not really

word count: just over 6k

author’s note: WOW okay hello. this has probably been a little longer awaited than i anticipated, but it is done now! the first idea on my previous post and first completed fic i’ll ever post on this account,,, and tumblr in general.

anywho, if you notice some odd spelling of some words (centre, colour) i am canadian, so things are normally spelled a little differently here. so i apologize if that throws you off 😭

but finally, i felt like i had to base a fic off of this song. after hearing the craving (jenna’s version) for the first time and seeing the video for it. i was brought to tears just because of how cute and sweet it was. i’m also a huge twenty one pilots fan, so that’s another part of me that went “WRITE THIS FIC.” so, here it is. i really hope you guys enjoy it :))

special shoutout to my bestie @wooziorgans for helping me with publishing, tags, banners, and also gassing me up to actually finish this and post this. you all should follow him as well because his posts are SO GOOD. he’s such a great writer.

divider by @cafekitsune

now, onto the fic!

~sunshinedeekay <3

“I don’t know why I can’t stop crying. I fear about getting old, and I don’t know a lot about you still…”

That was a voicemail that Seokmin constantly replayed in his long history of Y/N’s voicemails they had sent. He saved every single one. Even if it was the most mundane voicemail in existence, any sound of his precious Y/N’s voice was utter harmony to his ears.

He remembered that voicemail vividly. Waking up early in the morning to see a missed call and a voicemail from his partner of a few months. Y/N’s whisper sounded like they were crying, but also attempting to stay quiet and hold everything together. He remembered how nervous Y/N was of being good enough for Seokmin, and still not knowing a whole lot about him because they had only dated for a short amount of time. It crushed his heart to hear them like that.

He sent a plethora of loving words to them that day.

Now, here he was. Lied in an unfamiliar hotel bed in an unfamiliar hotel room. Darkness overcame the space, and the only light that shone was the screen of his voicemails. His thumb pressed the play button over… and over… and over. He kept thinking. Thinking more than actually doing, and that was what led him to the sinking feeling in his stomach. He felt so much guilt and remorse for what happened between them before he left for tour, and even if they talked after like nothing happened, it still lingered on his mind.

——

“You’ve been distant…” Y/N’s quiet voice brought up softly as Seokmin was cuddling their tired body that was still under the covers. He was up and ready to leave for SEVENTEEN’s short tour around the area. “Did I do something wrong?”

“Why would you think that?” Seokmin’s voice responded just as soft, if not even softer than Y/N’s sleepy tone. “I would tell you if something was wrong. You know that.”

“But you haven’t been telling me.” Y/N spoke back. Seokmin stopped in his tracks with that statement. “You’ve been out late at practice, always on your phone with something, and always sitting with that lost puppy look in your eyes. Every time I ask what’s wrong, you dismiss me.” Y/N continued as they slowly sat up and gently pushed Seokmin off. They finished their explanation with a rub to their sleepy eyes. “I’m beginning to worry there’s something you’re hiding from me.”

“Why would I hide anything?” Seokmin found himself getting defensive right off the bat. Why was he speaking like this? He never spoke like this right away to anybody, let alone Y/N who just asked a harmless question.

Y/N’s brows furrowed from the sudden defensive tone. Their nose scrunched with slight irritation. “I don’t know why you would. You never have before, so why do you seem to be now?” They spoke in the same tone back to him. Seokmin could tell that the way he spoke to Y/N irritated them.

“You act like I’m cheating or something.” Seokmin suddenly muttered. Then he thought about what he just said, and his eyes widened while his blood turned to ice. Did he really just say that? Even after he knew that was a sore subject for you? He cursed that dirtbag for even considering another woman over you… Now he just threw that out into the open.

“…What?” Was all that could come out of Y/N’s mouth. Their voice got quiet again, and their brows angled more with worry and irritation. “There’s no way you said that just now.” Despite the instant regret Seokmin felt for saying what he just said, he felt all of the stress from his planning and work bubbling over. He couldn’t stop himself from speaking now.

“Jesus, Y/N. I just wanted to say goodbye. I don’t have time to talk about this right now. Do you really not trust me enough to believe I could cheat on you?” Seokmin asked. His voice slightly sharpening with every syllable as he stood up and looked at his partner. His heart squeezed just looking at Y/N, their expression read as two parts confused, and one part hurt.

“Well excuse me for being a little worried and skeptical about your shady behaviour recently. You haven’t exactly been open and affectionate with me as of late.” Y/N started to argue. It was true. Because of Seokmin’s thinking and panicking about their relationship, he said less, and gave Y/N less affection than he normally did.

“Do I have to be clung to your hip the whole time in order for you to trust me? That’s a little much.” Seokmin retorted back. He slung his backpack over one shoulder and raised the handle of his suitcase.

“That’s not what I said at all, and you know it.” Y/N raised their voice slightly. That was the straw that broke the camel’s back for Seokmin.

“Well then I don’t know what you want from me, Y/N! It’s ridiculous that I change my routine with you just slightly and suddenly you think I could be cheating?” Seokmin just spoke without thinking. If current him could go back in time, god he would slap himself in the face. “I don’t have time for this. I gotta go before I’m late.”

“Fine. Leave.” Y/N spoke sharply. No “travel safe” or “I love you” spoken between either of them. Seokmin just left without a word, and probably too harsh of a slam of the front door.

——

Seokmin groaned internally thinking about that fight. Even though he apologized profusely over the phone to Y/N that night after he landed in Japan, he felt his heart still hurting. If he could explain everything, he would. But it wasn’t like that.

Truth be told, he was thinking about proposing to them.

He thought about it so much that it made him panic to himself. What if they weren’t ready? What if they said no? What if they realized they suddenly didn’t love him enough to want to spend a life with him like that? Sure, they had been together for about three years now, living together for one, and everything had been absolute bliss for Seokmin since then. But what if Y/N didn’t feel the same?

Seokmin continued to scroll his camera roll now. Having a folder made specifically for any of Y/N’s pictures or videos he would end up taking or saving. Every time he would look at a photo, the memory replayed in his mind.

Oh! Like the beautiful one of Y/N walking a trail full of looming evergreen trees. Dawned in a cute trench coat, a beanie, and a scarf he had bought for them just moments ago before that point. Their nose and cheeks were red from the cold, and their eyes were crinkled from their joyful, genuine smile.

——

“Take a few steps ahead, love! The scenery is perfect for a picture!” Seokmin told Y/N. His new camera he got for his birthday held in his chilled, slender hands while he placed it closer to his face to get a good frame.

Y/N didn’t even question it, but he could see the way they got flustered from him being so eager to take a picture of them. He knew they always got bashful when he insisted on taking a picture of them because that moment was just right. Even if the scenery wasn’t perfect, Y/N always was to Seokmin’s eyes. So a pretty scenery like this was just the cherry on top of an already delectable sundae.

Seokmin snapped a couple pictures, and as he looked back at them, his heart lept. Y/N looked so pretty. They were always so pretty. He couldn’t suppress the goofy smile on his face. He caught up to Y/N after taking the pictures with the same smile that started to ache his cold cheeks.

“Did they turn out good?” Y/N asked, but before they could even finish that breath, they felt Seokmin’s strong arms around their waist. Lifting them off their feet and spinning them in circles. Y/N burst into a fit of laughter, and held onto him tight.

“You’re so pretty.” Seokmin mumbled into their warm neck. He placed a lingering kiss against their supple skin. “I love you so much.”

——

Seokmin continued to scroll. Finding a video of him and Y/N playfully partner dancing courtesy of Seungkwan. There wasn’t any special setting, no special occasion, they were just dancing in their kitchen to the music playing on the TV. Both of their smiles infectious through the screen as they just looked happy to be with each other, and Y/N’s darling laugh as Seokmin tried (but ultimately fumbled) a complicated spin around. Seokmin wrapped his arms around his love, and the video ended.

There were so many little things. So many pictures that were taken at such different points in time. From fun and outdoorsy, to the mundane, soft, and intimate moments Seokmin got to share. All with one person. One person he knew he could and would love for the rest of his life. If Y/N wasn’t ready, he would wait for the rest of his days until they were.

He needed to let them know just how much he was ready for this next step. How much he loved them. He hated the thought of putting them on the spot like that, but goddammit, he would give Y/N the universe if they asked for it. Even if it meant taking a chance, and possibly taking some sense of security for such a big decision even for a split second. He would give them everything.

And that’s exactly what Seokmin was determined to do. He was gonna marry Y/N.

“So, I’ve had this idea for a while,” Seokmin started casually, sitting across Joshua in a secluded café the next morning. The warm sun comforting both of their bodies in addition to the lattes and pastries on a large plate in front of them. “But you have to swear to me that this stays between us. It goes to nobody else in the group or anybody else you know unless I say something to somebody else.”

This puzzled Joshua. He eyed Seokmin over his mug as he sipped from it for a lingering moment before setting the drink back on its saucer. He licked the frothed milk off his lips before he spoke. “Alright. What are you thinking about?”

Seokmin felt his heart begin to race in his chest once more as he nervously tapped his index finger onto the porcelain cup of his half-drank latte. He had to prepare himself to gain the courage to even say a few words- the main words- of his plan. How was he gonna explain everything he thought about the whole process?

“I…” His voice fell short for a moment. His throat forced a hard swallow before he sighed and tried again. “I’m proposing to Y/N.”

It was a good thing Joshua had his mug set down by now. Otherwise he’d have choked and had hot coffee spilled all over himself. Fortunately, only one of the two things happened. Except he choked on air when he heard Seokmin finally explain the summed up version of his idea.

He finished coughing a couple more times before patting his chest softly. “You’re being dead serious?”

“I’ve never been more serious than anything in my life.” Seokmin breathed. His brows furrowed in concern for his friend, but they quickly softened once he saw Joshua was fine. “I just,” he continued. “I was thinking about it all last night. Listening to their beautiful voice over the phone, looking over our old pictures and videos… It made me realize just how lucky of a person I am to have somebody as great as Y/N. They make me shine only the best parts of me, and I’ve never felt unsafe or uncomfortable around them once. I’ve thought about this for so long, and it was what was making me so off these past couple weeks. But now, I don’t think any other choice is a compromise.”

Joshua stared in awe, but the way his doe eyes twinkled when hearing Seokmin just open his heart up and speak truthfully about such a huge decision made his heart swell with pride for his best friend. Honestly, he wouldn’t be surprised if he cried at the wedding. “Seokmin…”

Seokmin looked to Joshua, and paused for a moment before continuing. The tapping on his mug stopped. “Every moment we’ve shared together has held a special place in my soul. Y/N is the most patient, loving, and perfect person I’ve been graced with. I want your help in carrying out the plan, and even the planning. I was thinking of asking Seungkwan as well, but I wanted to tell each of you this privately.”

Joshua couldn’t fight the smile on his face. He reached to take Seokmin’s nervous tapping hand and clasp it in a firm grasp. “I’ll do anything you need me to do. I’m so proud of you, Seokmin. You deserve Y/N and Y/N deserves you. To see the way you two have blossomed over the past couple years has been an honour, and I would love nothing more than to help you take the next step.”

Seokmin felt his eyes gloss slightly. He squeezed Joshua’s large hand with the same intensity as he gave him a tearful smile. His bright teeth in full view and almost glimmering from the morning sun coming through the window.

“I knew I could count on you.”

“Y/N-ah!~” Seokmin’s sweet sing-song tone would call out to his beloved partner. His feet scuttled from the kitchen to their shared bedroom, where a sleepy Y/N, probably only about half awake thanks to Seokmin’s loud voice, would lie.

“Min…” Y/N would grumble. Opening their eyes and squinting from the neutral light that now flooded the bedroom. “What time is it?”

“I’m sorry, lovebug, I know it’s early and you like your sleep,” Seokmin started. Straddling his partner’s legs to lean over them and slightly press his weight onto their body, peppering Y/N in delicate kisses. “But I have a big day planned. I’m making breakfast right now, so you can get ready while I finish. Dress nicely, because I’m pampering you, today.” He gave a cheeky grin. Leaning over to place one last kiss right in the centre of their forehead.

Y/N would laugh gently through their nose. They moved to lazily wrap their arms around Seokmin’s toned body and pulled him closer on top of them. “But you’re so warm and comfy like this…” They’d whine into his warm neck.

Seokmin would breathily laugh in return. He rested more of his weight onto Y/N’s body as he nuzzled his nose into their cheek and gave a lingering peck on their skin. “Mmm… But today is gonna be so fun. I know you’ll love it.” His voice was a sweet and low purr into Y/N’s ear. Something that could always make them shiver just from the sensation of his breath and the vibrations from his voice.

“Fine.” Y/N sighed and slid their arms from around Seokmin’s broad body. They lied flat with their arms sprawled out so he could climb off of them with ease.

Seokmin would grin like a child on Christmas while hovering over Y/N. Placing one more kiss onto their lips before climbing off. “That’s my lovebug. Trust me. You won’t regret it!” He exclaimed, then hurriedly shuffled his way back out to the kitchen.

Y/N pushed themselves up and sighed softly again. They looked over to the clock, 7AM. Jerk. As they rubbed the sleep from their eyes and face, they couldn’t help but wonder.

What did Seokmin have planned?

“Okay… And… Open!” Seokmin uncovered Y/N’s eyes. He had covered them some minutes ago to lead Y/N to a very special place for the both of them. One they would often go to when they needed a break outside, but also didn’t want to do anything too huge. In front of Y/N was the small café where they and Seokmin had their first date. Nothing had changed about it, despite it being a couple years since that fateful day, but that’s what always made the experience so wonderful each time they revisited.

“I had a feeling you’d bring me here.” Y/N teased Seokmin with a grin and a small poke to the right side of his ticklish waist. Seokmin would laugh and grab ahold of Y/N’s hand, lacing his long fingers with theirs.

“Yeah, yeah… But you don’t love coming here any less.” Seokmin chuckled and led them into the café. The little bell rang as the cyan door opened, and Seokmin held the door for Y/N to let them enter first.

Y/N entered and absentmindedly made their way towards the table they always sat at since that first date, but a sight of something caused them to stop in their tracks.

Already lied out on the table was Y/N’s favourite pastries and coffee. The beverage being made just the way they liked it. On the little cup, the word “Lovebug” was written beside it with a small heart beside it.

“Min…” Y/N would gasp softly. Bringing a hand over their mouth as they felt their heart swell from the sweet gesture.

“Yes, love?” Seokmin would have a loving grin on his face again. Bringing his arms around his lover’s waist as he pressed them up against him a little more. “Is everything alright?”

“Of course, yes! Sorry I’m just—“ Y/N tried to explain. But there wasn’t any words that could put together the amount of love and tenderness they felt in this moment for Seokmin. Maybe it was because they resolved their fight just the night before, but they also just felt… Happy. Overjoyed to have somebody like Seokmin who loved them enough to do this.

“It’s alright… Just sit down and enjoy. We can take whatever we don’t eat back with us to the car.” Seokmin reassured with his gentle tone. Moving his hands over Y/N’s hips to gently rub gentle circles around the bones with the pads of his thumbs.

The café date was everything Y/N could’ve dreamt it would be. They caught up with Seokmin, who told many stories about SEVENTEEN’s escapades during their tour, showing pictures, videos, and whatnot. But not to mention, Seokmin was just as lovey-dovey as he always was.

He held their hands over the table, under the table, gently grabbed their knee under the table and gave it a loving caress. But the way he looked at them…

Y/N had never noticed it before, maybe because they didn’t believe the people who told them all the time about how Seokmin looked at them, but they saw it now. His eyes glimmered with the sun whenever his attention was on you. His expression was bright, beautiful, endearing. They didn’t think it was true, but Joshua was right.

“He looks at you like you put stars in the sky.”

“Everything okay, lovebug?” Seokmin’s voice would bring them back to reality. Y/N suddenly looked up to Seokmin’s curious, and almost concerned expression since they had zoned out suddenly.

“Mm? Yeah. I’m all good.” Y/N reassured. Gently squeezing Seokmin’s hand that was holding theirs on top of the table. “Keep talking, I’m listening to every word.”

To let the food settle, Seokmin took them to a park next. One in the middle of town where they’d normally walk at any time of the day. Early morning, afternoon, middle of the night, you name it. They walked it.

Seokmin had Y/N’s hand in one hand, and the strap of his camera bag in the other. He was looking for a perfect scenery spot to take pictures. But not just of the trees, or that cute little bird that perched and twittered on the branch, no. He needed a picture of Y/N. One where he could capture the memory of this moment, of Y/N, before both of their lives would change forever.

“Y/N, go stand over there. Right under those trees. You see that little divot in the grass?” Seokmin tugged gently on Y/N’s hand to get their attention. Then leaned in real close to their side to point. He wanted to make sure they could see the spot, and that he wasn’t just crazy. But honestly? It happened more than he’d admit.

Y/N squinted to look for the spot. Seokmin looked over to their expression, and a small grin spread on his narrow cheeks. The way their nose scrunched always had his heart in a knot.

“I see it!” Y/N grinned. Slipping their hand out of Seokmin’s and making their way towards the spot. Seokmin was already getting his camera out. Taking test pictures to alter anything that made the picture look less than perfect. He then watched Y/N through the camera, and his heart pounded against his chest.

God. He was down horrendously.

“Now just look around. Don’t even worry about me being here. Just be you.” Seokmin instructed. Holding the camera up to his face as he carefully watched his loving partner through the lens. He couldn’t fight the goofy smile from his face.

Y/N would casually pose and look around. Smiling up at the little bird on the branch and even whistling back. Well— they attempted to, anyway. This made Seokmin laugh behind the camera.

When they saw Seokmin lower the camera, their attention caught glimpse of a group of pigeons. Picking from the ground and minding their own business. Y/N suddenly wondered how close they could get to the pigeons without startling them.

They took careful and slow steps to the group, and eventually found themself in the centre of the pigeon circle.

Seokmin looked up from his camera to where Y/N was before. They weren’t there? He looked around the area for them, and then found his partner standing in the middle of what looked like a pigeon cult. This made his chest ring with a hearty laughter as he took out his phone and started to video them.

“How did you get in there?” He laughed.

“I don’t know! I just walked in!” Y/N would respond with a giggle. Looking up to Seokmin and shaking their head when they noticed him recording. They continued to look down at the pigeons all strutting around them. Smiling when just watching their little mannerisms.

Suddenly, Y/N did a little hop. The pigeons went flying around them. They would laugh and shield their head. Rushing their way back to Seokmin, who was laughing even harder at this point. His dimples on full display as his eyes crinkled happily. He placed his phone away and took Y/N into his arms while they both still laughed.

After the walk in the park, things were staring to get a little darker now. The afternoon was setting into dusk, and the air stared to get a bite of chill within the breeze.

“We’ll head home soon. There’s just one more thing I need to do.” Seokmin smiled. His voice had suddenly gone more quiet. It faltered slightly. Was he suddenly nervous?

“Is everything alright, Min?” Y/N asked. Squeezing his hand to attempt to reassure him, even if they didn’t know what was happening.

“I’m more than alright, my love. Don’t worry.” Seokmin smiled. Squeezing Y/N’s delicate hand in return as he led them to another small place. An abandoned boardwalk over a lake not too far from the park. It was deserted. Not a single soul in sight.

The only sign of life Y/N could see on it, was a path made just for them to walk. Small candles bordered the pathway to lead them towards the end of the dock. Their flames danced elegantly in the breeze.

“Seokmin? What is this?” Y/N asked with a surprised laugh. A wide smile on their face as they gawked at the scene in front of them. They couldn’t help but pull out their phone and take a picture.

“Shhh… Just walk with me.” Seokmin grinned. Moving his arm to wrap around Y/N’s waist and pull them into his hip. Leading them through the path in a slow pace. Like one you’d take through an art exhibit. Y/N took in the sight around them. The clear sky showed the beautiful colours of the forming sunset, the gentle waves of the lake plopped onto the shore from the slight breeze. They felt their heart beat pulsing against their chest. What was all of this?

Seokmin, on the other hand, was quaking in his dress shoes. This was it. This was the final step to take before he asked Y/N the biggest question he’d ever ask in his life. He did his best to stay calm on the outside. Pulling Y/N closer and just walking in silence to let them take in the scenery. It was beautifully romantic. Seungkwan nailed it.

As they approached the end of the dock. There was a projector screen that came into view, as well as a plethora of rose petals, and a small rug that was lied down in front of the projector.

Seokmin guided Y/N by the small of their back to stand on the rug. Watching their expression light up and their jaw slightly hang open as the projection finally came on. What would play is little video memories of Seokmin and Y/N together. From when they first dated, progressing into more recent times. While a gentle song played in the background. One Y/N had sent to him when they first started dating.

“When you touch me, yeah I feel butterflies

I’m gonna love you ‘till the day I die.”

Y/N covered their mouth with both of their hands now. Feeling tears well up in their eyes as they continued to watch the compilation of videos. There were so many. Recorded by Y/N, recorded by Seokmin, or even from an outside source of one of their friends.

Seokmin stood carefully behind Y/N. Making eye contact with Joshua and giving a small nod of acknowledgement. Joshua followed the signal. Sneaking out from his hiding place to hand Seokmin the ring box.

Seokmin clasped his fingers around the box. Joshua placed his hand over Seokmin’s fingers and the box. Joshua gave Seokmin a silent encouragement through the reassuring touch. Seokmin nodded, feeling tears already well in his eyes as he smiled to Joshua.

When the slideshow looped again, Seokmin tucked the ring box in his back pocket. He approached behind Y/N and casually wrapped his arm around their waist. He took a moment to appreciate the new music playing. A peaceful, romantic piece that Woozi had put together just for this special night.

“We’ve spent so many memories together, haven’t we?” Seokmin started. His voice just above a whisper as he tried his best to keep his own emotions in check for this important moment.

“Min…” Y/N started. Looking up to Seokmin. But he took their hands in his and gave them a tender grin. Rubbing his thumbs over their knuckles as if he still didn’t remember how they felt off the top of his head.

“I love you, Y/N. I always get so scared I don’t say it enough.” Seokmin started now. His chest tightened with tears. He sighed softly and just kept himself grounded by rubbing his thumbs over their small knuckles. “But I really do love you. With all of my heart, my soul, my existence. I wouldn’t be who I am if you weren’t by my side. I don’t know who blessed me to have you, whether it was some sort of god, or the universe, or just something that drew us together. But I will always be thankful for what I have. That I have you.” His voice broke slightly. The tears making his vision blurry as he tightened his grip on Y/N’s hands. Bringing both of them up to gently place a kiss on each set of knuckles.

“You’ve been my world, my happiness, my inspiration, my muse… You’ve been and always will be all of these for me. And Y/N I— to imagine a life without you in it breaks my heart.” Seokmin continued. He gently lowered their hands, but kept them in his grip. Blinking back his tears to meet Y/N’s tearful gaze.

They already figured it out.

“Which is why…” Seokmin trailed off. Slowly bringing himself to his left knee. His gaze never leaving Y/N’s, and his heart leaping when he saw them gasp alight from surprise and start to choke out silent sobs.

“I want you to be my everything for the rest of my days, Y/N. I don’t see myself in the future with anybody else other than you. You complete me, you love me in ways that I’m sure you don’t even know yourself. You’re kind, patient, caring, selfless… You’re everything I could ever hope to achieve.” Seokmin’s voice now began to break. Seeing their tearful expression mixed with the overwhelming feelings of both love and fear made it impossible for him to hold back his emotions now.

“I don’t say enough how much I love you or appreciate you, and I feel terrible I can’t remind you every single day just how deep my feelings root for you. So… I hope that this can tell you just how much I need you with me.” He finally one of his hands out of Y/N’s. Reaching into his pocket to pull out the black velvet box and lifting the lid of it. He held it up to them. The ring was a beautiful silver. The jewel wasn’t just a diamond within it, but instead, a mix of amethyst, his birth stone, and Y/N’s birthstone. A(n) [insert birthstone].

“Y/N. I’m not perfect in loving you like you deserve. But I’ve never been more sure of this choice in my life. So my question is, do you want to love me for just as long? Will you marry me?” Seokmin finally asked. There wasn’t much silence between them in terms of words, but even the most brief pause felt like a million years. Was he pushing this too far too soon? Was Y/N not ready? What if he just put them on the spot all for nothing?

“Yes… God, Seokmin, yes.” Y/N choked out through sobs now. Frantically nodding their head as they covered their trembling lips with their free hand that still wasn’t in Seokmin’s.

Seokmin felt his world stop for a moment. They… They said yes?

“You… You will?” Seokmin stuttered out. His eyes going wide in surprise as his jaw hung agape. The tears were now flowing down his tanned and flushed cheeks full throttle now. They said yes. He couldn’t believe they just said yes.

“Yes!” Y/N nodded as they nodded frantically again. Feeling more sobs escape their chest as they looked over the ring, then to Seokmin. The Seokmin who had lived them better than anybody ever could, the Seokmin who was made of affection and tenderness, the Seokmin who was now on one knee wanting their souls to be dedicated to each other.

Seokmin quickly took Y/N’s trembling left hand and the ring out of the box with his other hand. Sliding it over their finger and looking over it now. It was beautiful. Just as amazing as he’d imagined. The best part was, it fit perfectly.

Now, Seokmin had pushed himself up to envelop Y/N in a tearful embrace. Sweeping them off their feet to wrap their legs around his waist as he quietly sobbed into their neck, while they did the same on him.

“I love you, Y/N. I love you so much.” He sobbed quietly. Moving one hand to the back of their hair to press their face a little more against his warm skin. He wanted them to be as close as possible.

“I love you too, Seokmin. With everything I have.” Y/N sobbed back. Clinging to him tighter as if it would be the last time they would ever hold him. But they both knew now that that was far from true.

Suddenly, cheers erupted from behind the embracing and tearful couple. Y/N would look up and realize that, indeed, Seokmin had help.

Seungkwan was throwing leftover rose petals in celebration, also crying with the two. Joshua was just crying and cheering for Y/N and Seokmin, a clear smile of pride written all over his tearful face. Wonwoo was clapping for the pair, his camera hanging from its strap over his neck as he had the widest smile out of the bunch. Soonyoung, standing next to Seungkwan, who was also throwing petals and shouting in victory like a viking going to war. Finally, a calm Jihoon and Minghao, well— calm compared to the rest. They were just as happy as everybody else, but weren’t the open crier types.

Seokmin set Y/N down, which caused Y/N to look back up to him with a trembling smile. Seokmin wouldn’t hesitate in taking their face between his hands and connecting their lips together in a deep, loving kiss. Wonwoo raised his camera to take a few more final pictures of the beautiful moment.

When Seokmin pulled away from Y/N, his forehead went to rest against theirs. Just closing his eyes and enjoying their new moments as an engaged couple.

“You won’t regret this. I’ll be the best husband anybody could have…” Seokmin promised through a whisper.

“I know you will…” Y/N whispered back. “I love you, Min.”

“I love you, too…”

As the group now worked to clean up the romantic scene, there was nobody short of a smile, or a stray tear. Joshua was clinging onto Seokmin from pure excitement, even though he wasn’t even the one that got engaged.

“Well,” Jihoon started. Approaching Y/N’s side and placing a gentle hand on their shoulder. “I guess the bad news from all of this is you’re really stuck with us now.” He joked with a slightly cheeky grin to his round face.

“Oh no, that’s gonna be terrible.” Y/N chided sarcastically as they playfully rolled their eyes.

“Listen, I’m just warning you now, this is your last chance to run for the hills.” Jihoon added. A chuckle leaving his chest as he finished. There were a few moments of comfortable silence between the two, before Jihoon tightened his grip slightly on Y/N’s shoulder.

“Welcome to the family, Y/N.”

[yunarim]

╰┈➤ summary : you and your reliable partner grim are the most famous interdimensional travelers under the Official Isekai Association. you're used to traveling into psychological thrillers and horrors. however, this time something goes wrong, and you suddenly turn into the protagonist of… an otome game?!

— characters : jade leech, leona kingscholar | kalim al-asim, azul ashengrotto | lilia vanrouge, idia shroud

⌞tags⌝ : gn reader, fluff at times, occasional angst (more angst for kalim's & azul's parts actually), typical manhwas tropes, mention of a typical isekai manhwa death by truck hit... yeah, you go from the first route to the last (from jade to idia), hence the parts are connected

— w.c. : 6.4k+

⌞notes⌝ : continuing with the second part of the series ~

“Based on your expression, is the walkthrough going smoothly?” 

Grim asked, jumping on the bed you were laying at, and placed his head on your stomach, chewing something smelling like fish, and you hated the fact you were still not recovered after being pointed out what you smell like by Leona.

“I mean, I can’t see the progress, given you’re the protagonist for this genre,” Grim noticed. “How many are left tho?”

So that's how it looked from someone else’s perspective. Just routes to finish, game characters, literary images, not people who could feel, have their own personalities, and… Feel something for you. You have never thought about otome games before, they were out of your qualification, and now you were sure enough that once you escape this world, you’ll ask your boss to never transmigrate you to otome genre ever again. 

Funny enough, you’re used to dating. Sometimes counterfeiting feelings was a key to the true ending, so you just had to do that at times, but you never actually felt something yourself. And surely you didn't feel loved. 

“Four,” you answered after a short pause, closing your eyes. 

“Make sure to do your job well, henchman,” Grim yawned. “I’ll help you with my magic!”

“Yes…” You replied vaguely, appreciating that thanks to Grim you were given an opportunity to even stay here in NRC, considering you possessed no magic. “I’ll try my best…”

Even if you wanted to leave as soon as you could, having no desire to leave these people all alone after you suddenly crashed into their lives. 

You couldn’t find a proper way to name all the boys routes of whom you needed to… finish. Targets? Characters? Lovers? No, that wasn’t it.

In any case, you checked Kalim Al-Asim’s profile before heading to school. A bright, cheerful person radiating nothing but happiness and joy, a complete opposite of your gloomy and indifferent self. You presumed he would be easy to approach, given how easy-going he seemed, but his social status made you question the ease of the walkthrough. 

A son of a wealthy merchant, close to royalty again. Fine, you wondered if going through Leona’s route made you stronger and more experienced. 

After a half of the day passed you’ve realized you couldn’t find Kalim that easily as you first thought you would. Probably he was being more secure than Leona, and you tried your best investigating where he could be. Most obviously somewhere in his dormitory, Scarabia, but you preferred not to enter the dormitories itselves, ‘playing’ on neutral waters. The transmigrator currency was still the same, because you were paid only after completing the whole story, so you ran out of money to buy the info about Kalim’s location. 

After the classes you also realized you haven’t had enough sleep because of memories made with Leona haunting you at night, and you most probably needed to brew some coffee, which caused you to remember Jade and frown.

No, it’s not the right time to think about them, you thought, entering the school’s kitchen and stumbling upon someone, your forehead hitting someone else’s.

“Oh, I’m very sorry, I didn’t notice… Huh?”

You raised your head, pressing a hand to your forehead, and gasped when you realized it was none other than Kalim Al-Asim, who was mirroring your actions and massaging his head with his hand.

“Oh, isn’t it Yuu! Nice to meet you! I’m Kalim Al-Asim, but you can call me Kalim!”

You were spellbound to say something at the moment, appreciating his wonderful appearance and drowning in the melted gold of his eyes. 

“Nice to meet you too— Eh?”

Before you wanted to continue, a pink glow above his head made you jolt. 

The heart icon was already filled up to half of it. 

Your eyes widened. You’ve only met him! And you were sure that you hadn't met him earlier in previous walkthroughs, so how?..

“Oh, did I hit you too hard?! Oh no, what to do… Jamil, we should call a doctor!!”

Kalim’s face radiating genuine worry appeared too close to yours, and you realized that you fell silent extremely suddenly. You shook your head, replying with a confused smile.

“I’m alright, just lost in thoughts. How are you, though? I hit you too…”

“I’m okay!” He giggled at you, and his contagious laugh flowed to you, causing you to chuckle softly. “But still, we need to make sure you’re fine. Jamil, we should—”

“Yuu-san doesn’t seem to be in danger. Quit exaggerating.”

Ah, right. Jamil Viper, a person in Kalim’s profile mentioned as his personal ‘servant’. 

His figure appeared behind Kalim’s back and approached you. Jamil somehow reminded you of yourself with how composed and calm he looked, observing if everything was right with your forehead. You outstretched your hand to Jamil, regaining composure.

“Nice to meet you, I’m Yuu,” you said, receiving a silent nod.

“Jamil Viper,” he replied when you two shared a handshake, but a sudden Kalim’s complaint cut your strict-seeming atmosphere.

“I want to shake your hand too, Yuu!!” 

“Okay, no problem?..”

You watched through him, focusing on the heart icon filled up to the half, and deepened into your thoughts. 

Apparently the icon was filled thrice, and all three times symbolized three significant events happening throughout the routes. But given you two just met… Wasn’t the system making mistakes?

“Did you want to use the kitchen? You can join us! We’re preparing dishes for the party held in Scarabia. Right, join us at the party, too!!”

“You surely are enthusiastic, Kalim,” you smiled at him. 

“Stop inviting everyone without thinking twice,” Jamil sighed. “Not to be rude to you, Yuu-san.”

“It’s alright, I understand. Thank you for your offer, but it’s just what Viper said. I’ll make sure to join you one day, but I’ve got plans today.”

You actually hadn’t any other plans than getting Kalim to know better, and the party was an excellent opportunity, but at the same time you didn’t want to get too deep to the point you would miss him dearly after finishing his route too. It was getting hard for you to just have friendly chats with them, then growing closer to the point you couldn’t just leave them anymore. 

You wanted to play it safe with Kalim, although suspecting you would fail miserably. 

“Okay! Then come tomorrow. Or the day after, we’re going to have parties every day during this week~”

“Haha, that’s very generous of you,” you giggled. “Maybe I can help you with cooking today?”

“No need, I—” Jamil started talking, but Kalim’s bright shine overlapped Jamil’s words.

“It’s a brilliant idea, Jamil works so hard, it must be really tough! Right, I’ll help too!”

“You… you stay still,” Jamil sighed with a heaviness and annoyance, then looked at you. “Yuu-san is enough. Just watch.”

“Fi~ne!”

You asked Jamil where you could find an apron, and he suddenly appeared in front of you, pulling the piece of clothing over you and tying strings behind your back.

“Oh, thank you,” you almost whispered, not expecting Jamil to be so close to you, and glanced over to catch Kalim’s sudden gaze you couldn’t decipher, but a familiar glimpse of overjoy fled from his deep eyes for a mere second, and a bitter smile grew on his face. 

“Ah, I know!!” He suddenly jumped from the chair he was sitting on. “Yuu, you’re living in Ramshackle, right?!”

“Why do I feel like he’s going to suggest something crazy,” Jamil mumbled, but Kalim ignored him.

“Yes, I am,” you nodded.

“You’ll be free at 10 o’clock in the evening?”

You blinked absentmindedly. 

“I guess so. Why?”

“Then just be at home at the time! You’ll see~”

“Alright?..”

You heard Jamil sighing again and decided to let it be, grabbing vegetables you needed to chop, and continued your work, accompanied by Kalim’s soft cheerful singing.

You expected anything but a magic carpet ride at 10 o’clock in the evening. 

“Ready, Yuu?”

“No, I’m noooooot!!—”

And with that you flew straight into the night sky followed by Kalim’s happy noises. 

Actually, you thought that after dying for the very first time and then transmigrating from one world into another, make that cyclical, you would fear nothing, but suddenly soaring into the sky wasn’t included in your plans. 

But after seeing the canvas of the island and the sheet of the forest, framed by the endless sea from a bird's eye view, you were so enchanted that thoughts left your head, leaving only admiration.

“It’s beautiful, right?” Kalim said, looking at you and knowing you’re not noticing. 

“It is…” You whispered, remembering the same sky when you were enjoying fireworks with Jade, and shook your head. “Thank you for showing it to me!”

“He-he~ You couldn’t come to the party, so this is my apology for hitting you earlier.”

“As I’ve mentioned, it’s my fault too. I hit you too…”

“Aw come on Yuu, it’s okay. You even helped Jamil with food preparations.”

“Ah, yes,” you nodded. “He’s a wonderful cook, I wasn’t expecting!”

Corners of Kalim’s lips went slightly down, but he returned to his usual happy look when you turned to him.

“Right?? He’s incredible! There’s nothing he can’t do!”

“You surely like him, right?” You smiled at him cheerfully. “You seem to be very fond of him.”

“Don’t you think so too? You’ll realize how cool he is when you grow closer to him. Do you need any help? I’ve noticed your chemistry today~”

Your smile dropped, brows knitting together. Why would he say that?..

“I don’t think so?.. Is there any particular reason for me to get closer to Viper? Not to be offensive, of course.”

“Eh?” Kalim was obviously startled. “You don’t want to? But Jamil’s wonderful person and—”

“Kalim,” you stopped him. “I don’t quite get it at all and no, I have no intention of getting closer to Jamil. I mean, sure, I don’t know what can happen in the future, but as for the present, am I not being with you right now?”

Kalim gasped, gazing at you in surprise.

“I see he’s an important person to you, but we’re enjoying the evening together right now. Let’s talk about you instead, what do you think?”

“Oh,” he said. “You’re… what an interesting person you are, Yuu!”

“Y-yes? Me?..”

“Yeah! What do you want to know about me then?”

“Let’s see…” You hummed, returning your eyes to the sky. “Hm… suddenly I can’t think of anything.”

“People often ask if my family hires someone for a job, or does a certain facility belong to my family, or something like that… Would you like to ask something along those lines?”

“Kalim, wait, I think you’re misinterpreting my intentions,” you turned to him again, gently placing your hand above his. “I’m not going to be an employee under your family’s business. Why would you even think about it? I wanted to be friends in the first place.”

“Ah, friends!! Aren’t we friends already though?” He blinked at you. “Oh, wait, no, I should give you something!! Do you prefer gold or silver? Or maybe jewelry?”

“Kalim!!” You raised your voice, feeling a little overwhelmed. “I don’t need any of those. I was about to ask if you’re okay, it’s getting chilly…”

“Eh?”

“What?”

“Oh,” he laughed, his cheeks growing red out of shame. “Sorry, Yuu. It was just a precaution.”

“I don’t think I follow?”

“No, don’t worry. You’re an interesting person, indeed…”

You sighed, letting yourself lay down on the carpet and exhale the freshness of the night chilly air, and stare at the stars. 

“I don’t know you well. It’s literally the first day we know each other,” you started. “I don’t know your circumstances and what you meant by saying it was a precaution, but… it’s alright if you don’t trust me. But I can assure you that it’s okay, I don’t mind, considering I’m an alien from another dimension, it is only natural to question my intentions. And yet I want you to know that I just want to enjoy this evening to its maximum, and your company is very pleasant to me. We can even sit still and remain silent, somehow I think you’re a safe person to stay alone with. It’s cozy. Ah, sorry, I think I went overboard… Kalim?”

You shifted your gaze to him, meeting his widened eyes and parted lips, and then you blushed, realizing you really did go overboard, saying all your thoughts so easily, but you really couldn’t help yourself. 

Kalim suddenly burst into laughter, flopping down on the carpet with you and continuing giggling softly to the point that tears started accumulating in the corners of his eyes. 

“Are you alright? I said something stupid, sorry…”

“You’re not just an interesting person, Yuu,” he smiled, turning his head to you, giving you a realization he was extremely close to your face. “You’re wonderful.”

“I thought Viper was,” you chuckled, smiling at him and seeing him closing his eyes. 

“Jamil is wonderful, that’s true. And you’re also wonderful. But you’re…”

He fell silent, leaving you without an explanation.

“No, it’s nothing. You’re truly something. Thank you for saying all that to me, Yuu.”

“Remember, Kalim,” your hand acted on itself, grabbing his and interviewing fingers with his. “You’re wonderful, too. Appreciate yourself.”

And with a bright smile you showed to him, you also noticed the heart was filled to the max. You opened your eyes at once, jolting and causing Kalim to question what happened.

No… no, you couldn’t leave him just yet!! Not like that, not after you haven’t figured out an indescribable sadness in his eyes!!

“K-Kalim…” You mumbled, your fingers trembling slightly. “You’re still here…”

“Hm?” He tilted his head. “Of course I am, silly! Where else could I be?”

“You’re right…” You exhaled sharply, drawing him closer to you and enveloping in a tight hug. “Yes, you’re here. I’m glad.”

“Yuu?..”

His whole body was warm, and no bright light filled up the place, reassuring you that right at the moment everything was alright.

Two weeks passed since you two went on a magic carpet ride, and surprisingly you two really did talk, ate together during breaks, the time seemed to stop its flow. The heart icon above Kalim’s head was glowing with soft pink, filled to the top, and you couldn’t comprehend all that was happening. Your own heart and feelings resembled a ticking bomb ready to blow with all anticipation you’ve carried. 

Did he really feel something for you? But it was impossible to crush down the whole transmigrator system, you knew it was programmed just perfectly and flawlessly, never making any mistakes in its calculations. You’ve requested a percentage of Kalim’s indicators, which you never did here before since the procedure took a lot of time to analyze everything. And today it finally arrived, shocking you even more than you thought it would.

His so-called love meter was filled up to 100%, meaning he definitely fell for you, however…Why hasn’t his route finished yet?

Suddenly a familiar tall figure appeared in the entrance, and you recognized Jade glancing your way curiously.

Shit, you thought, clenching your shirt. 

“Yuu? You okay?” Kalim asked you, his head on your shoulder. 

You were sitting under the tree in the school yard, Jamil sitting at your left and doing homework. 

“Yeah, sorry I startled your sleep.”

“Nope, I wasn’t sleeping actually. Oh, isn’t it Jade over there? Hey, Jade!”

You wanted to tell Kalim not to ask Jade to come closer, but you actually had no right to do that, and nodded politely to Leech, escaping his focused look.

“Good afternoon, Kalim-san, Jamil-san. Yuu-san,” he greeted everyone, not letting his eyes shift from you. “How interesting to see you three together. I presumed Yuu-san… No, forgive me.”

“Yuu is really fun to be with, don’t you agree?” Kalim cheerfully smiled at Jade. “Right, would you love to join us? We’re having a picnic.”

“Would be wonderf—”

“Ah,” you suddenly mumbled, attracting Jade and Kalim’s attention. “Sorry, I think I should get going soon. You three may continue, though, I’m sorry…”

“Eh?” Kalim looked at you. “I thought you wanted to become friends with Jade?..”

“... Apparently Yuu-san is feeling uncomfortable in my presence,” Jade smiled slyly. “It is quite alright. I’ll get going then.”

“Ah, no, I… And he’s gone.” You whispered to yourself.

Right. It wasn’t his route. Anymore.

And before Kalim managed to ask you if you actually wanted to befriend Jade and that he could help, you all saw Leona approaching you with a strange look on his face. 

This day will be the death of you, really.

“Hello, Leona—”

“Herbivore,” Leona interrupted Kalim’s cheerful greeting. “Care to explain what the hell?”

“What do you mean, Leo… Kingscholar,” you carried a habit of calling your current ‘love interests’ by their name, and since Leona’s heart already disappeared, you shook your head. 

“You smell like me. And to remind you, we’ve interacted only once when you stepped on my tail.”

Kalim’s smile dropped, and his usually bright and warm features turned into worried and sad, which wasn’t left unnoticed by Jamil, who apparently had enough.

“I… I have no idea…”

“Senpai,” Jamil suddenly said, grabbing Leona’s hand. “Let me explain.”

“Hah?” Leona asked, annoyed. “The hell?”

“Just. Let me. Explain. Okay?”

Jamil looked at you with an expression saying ‘talk to Kalim immediately or I’ll punch you’, to which you gulped and nodded, thanking him silently.

“You’re so popular, Yuu!” Kalim said when Jamil forcefully dragged Leona out. “Everyone wants to get closer to you! Still don’t want me to help you with Jamil? His eyes were so dreamy when he looked at you just now!”

His eyes most definitely weren’t dreamy at all, though…

“Kalim,” you turned to him, taking his hands in yours and looking at him with all the seriousness you’ve got. “Stop misinterpreting my feelings. Please?”

“What do you mean?..”

“Be a little more selfish!” You pushed. “And please don’t decide for me or for Jamil or for anyone else. If I wanted to befriend Jamil, or Jade, or Leona, or—agh it doesn’t matter who exactly!—believe me, I would do that already. And yet I’m trying to spend more time with you. Did you question why?”

Because I need to finish your route and get on another one… Or so you thought, but that wasn’t the case anymore. 

You wanted to understand Kalim, to let him feel love and happiness, and as for you… It was enough if he could be happy, even if you couldn’t bring yourself to fall in love with anyone in this school. 

It was painful, but you couldn’t deny it anymore — all of them, Jade, Leona, and Kalim — they became dear and important people in your life, who changed it for the better. 

You couldn’t remember when was the last time you smiled genuinely, transmigrating into horrors and thrillers, and here you were, smiling at Kalim and embracing him with a sincerity you never thought you possessed.

“You always wish for other people’s happiness, restraining yourself and not enjoying the time you spend to its fullest. But Kalim, at least when you’re with me, don’t think about anyone. Think about yourself and… Let your own heart decide.”

“My heart…” He whispered, lowering his gaze, and you welcomed him in a soft embrace, drawing him to your chest. “Alright. Yuu!”

A familiar bright light you’ve been growing to hate each time appeared once again, and you worriedly glanced at Kalim, who was smiling. 

“I fell in love with you at first sight, Yuu. Thank you for not betraying my trust and teaching me important things. This is my gratitude.”

He pressed his lips to your forehead, and the last thing you saw was an image of his rosy cheeks and the most bright and genuine smile you’ve ever seen in your life.

“Thank you, too, Kalim.” 

And the hell to the system transporting you to your room in Ramshackle again, labeling Kalim’s route as ‘COMPLETED’.

“Y’know, sometimes it scares me when you finish another route.”

Waking up next to Grim after completing a walkthrough became a tradition you already wished to be let burn in ashes. 

“What do you mean?” You ask emotionlessly. 

Now that you think about it, you didn’t want to even find out who Azul Ashengrotto was. You possessed no desire, letting your inner child arise, and wishing for everything to begone. You were at the point of no return, and it was already driving you crazy. You certainly weren’t the type to abandon your duties and responsibilities, you've been chosen as an employee of the month more than once, your colleagues often staring at you in surprise at how you managed to save your psyche unscathed after surviving the most horrid things people could witness. 

And now you were closing your eyes, swallowing the urge to cry your eyes out and let you out of this circle of repeating routes. You didn’t want to love or be loved, you wanted to do your job. For what reason though? You never questioned, appreciating the chance to live endlessly after dying, wandering around the worlds with aeons passing through. 

You considered people here your responsibility, too. Normally you were okay with leaving the characters of the finished stories behind, justice being jubilated, and you coming back to the office and letting bosses choose another story for you to enter.

“I mean,” Grim said, crawling to your stomach. “It’s kinda terrifying to see how we remember ‘em, meet ‘em and casually chat, but they don’t even know what happened.”

“You’re right…” He really was. “Though I think they have some feelings left after I… after completing.”

“Fugnya?”

“Leona seems to have my scent lingering on him, Jade also looks like he remembers something. I think Kalim wouldn’t be too much different.”

“Isn’t it even worse than if they didn't remember you at all?”

It was worse, and Grim was right, hitting you right to the core. It was a living nightmare, knowing they possessed a feeling of you experiencing something together, and you were still here, they could ask you, see you, feel you at some point. 

But what will they do when you leave? 

“... I don’t want to get closer to Ashengrotto.”

“He’s your next target, right?” Grim asked. “But you need to.”

“I know,” you inhaled soundly with a heaviness in your chest. “So I came up with another plan.”

“What kind of? By the way, I don’t know about you, but as for me, I’d hurry up and finish ‘em all already.”

“Just to remind you, they’re not objects I could simply manipulate for my own purposes.”

“And you’re not an object yourself to excruciate yourself like that.”

You swallowed an objection, knowing Grim was surprisingly right. 

“As for the plan,” you shrugged the previous topic off. “You’ll see. I hope at least I will entertain Ashengrotto.”

You definitely had no intention of getting closer to Azul. From the very beginning after reading his profile and seeing 90% of the difficulty level to the point you weren’t sure if you’re capable enough to finish it yourself. 

You’ve created a scheme fitting Azul’s demeanor and attitude, however weren’t sure if it’s going to work, considering you actually wanted to make the system crash down and send you back to the office during the maintenance to never ever remembering everything again. 

Feelings were hard to possess. It wasn’t love, but it was you receiving it. You were sure they all loved you differently — out of interest, of accepting, of admiration. You, on the other hand, couldn’t name your feelings accurately, but you knew that emotions were scary, unknown and addictingly enchanting. 

Which is why you’ve entered Ashengrotto’s office with a feigned smile and a confidence you always seemed to demonstrate in other stories you’ve transmigrated into. Maybe a change of tactics would do?

“Ah, Yuu-san. Welcome to the Mostro Lounge.”

It, of course, was Jade who met you. You knew every corner of the Lounge after spending some time here with Leech, and now, receiving his unwaveringly polite smile, you answered with the same expression, greeting him cheerfully.

“Good afternoon, Leech.”

“How formal,” Jade noticed, but you tried to remain indifferent. “Alright, Yuu-san. How can I help you?”

“I’ve requested a meeting with Ashengrotto.”

And you had no intention of calling Azul by his name in his own route. 

It was controversial. You needed to gain his love and win his trust, but at the same time you weren’t sure for 100%, wanting to escape and let this be as it is. 

“Oh, indeed. Please follow me.”

His wide shoulders and arms that strongly held you when you almost fell off the cliff. The scent of the sea waves surrounding his figure and the way he glanced at you, thinking about something unbeknown to you. Argh, seriously, you wanted to turn back time and enjoy that night with a firework show once again.

“We’ve arrived,” he said. “Azul is informed you would come, so please come in.”

“Thank you.”

“My pleasure, Yuu-san. Be sure to come again for a cup of coffee.”

You clenched your teeth and nodded, knocking twice and entering after hearing ‘Come in’. 

“Good afternoon, Ashengrotto.”

“Welcome, Yuu-san.”

The fragrance of sea waves was even stronger than the one Jade radiated, conjoining with something salty and sweet at the same time. You made your way to the sofa and placed yourself there after Azul nodded, the sea blue of his eyes making you forget all the words you’ve prepared for a moment.

“I heard you have a request to make, am I being correct?”

“Very much so,” you grinned at him.

“Well then, you seem quite determined. I believe you are already informed that everything comes with a price.”

“Sure do,” you nodded. “My request may seem unusual, but I hope you guarantee to grant anything I desire?”

“How persistent you are, Yuu-san,” Azul chuckled. “But worry not, here in Mostro Lounge I can fulfill every wish you make. For a certain fee, of course.”

“Marvelous,” you clapped your hands and stood up, stretching out your hand for a handshake, causing Azul to look at you, questioning your actions. “Well then, hear my wish.”

“I’m listening.”

“Please fall in love with me.”

Azul’s glasses slipped off the bridge of his nose, his eyes widened in shock, and he glanced at you, feeling his cheeks growing hot.

“W-what— Excuse my sudden startle, Yuu-san. Your request is just… quite an unusual one.”

“You said you guarantee everything.”

“I’m not taking my words back, I really do guarantee you that, but… why would you do that?”

“Let’s see…” You hummed theatrically, drawing an outstretched hand to your chin and imitating a frown. “First, you’re handsome. Totally my type.”

“W-what are you saying?!”

“I solemnly swear that I’m telling the truth and truth only!”

“Y-Yuu-san, wait for a moment, would you…”

“Second, I want to experience love. And since you’re the one fulfilling the wishes here, isn’t it quite obvious I came to you?”

“Yuu-san… I believe you’re mature enough to realize that love isn’t something that can be imitated so easily, right?”

“This is why I’m asking you, Ashengrotto,” you suddenly bent over, meeting his flushed cheeks and giggling.

Ah, this is bad. He was actually cute.

“I know you won’t take it easy. Please date me with all the seriousness you’ve got and fall in love with me genuinely.”

“Yuu-san…”

A heart-shaped icon above his head filled with a small amount of a pink liquid, and you bit your lip. 

It was awful. You didn’t want him to fall in love with you, genuinely or not, you wanted to be free and him to be happy, not knowing you at all. Anything but destroying him after you leave.

“I promise to do my best too!” You smiled at him. 

But you couldn’t promise to make him happy afterwards.

“Your offer is surely an interesting one,” he averted his gaze, not being able to meet yours, eager and all bubble-like, following his, flustered. “But what can you offer for the fulfilling?”

“Ah, that.”

The system’s databases were sure something else. The information provided by them made your work easier, even if you had to spend all the currency you possessed, now having nothing. You switched roles with Grim, him being the one who became a ‘family breadwinner’ for a time being. 

“I’ll tell you my biggest secret no one in this school knows. No one in the entire dimension knows.”

“Huh?” Ashengrotto said. “What a flattering offer. Why should I trust you?”

“If you will fulfill my wish, you’ll be able to manipulate me, destroy me, make the whole world desire your knowledge and power, because I myself possess the knowledge every person would love to acquire.”

“You’re saying insanely nonsensical things, Yuu-san. But alright, prove it to me.”

“Great,” you clapped your hands. “I know there’s a photo of you and your classmates in the Atlantica Memorial Museum.”

Azul jolted at your statement, staring at your stoic expression.

“How did you…”

“Also,” you continued, getting closer to him and smiling slyly. “I know about the scheme you’ve planned to appropriate Ramshackle and all the things you’ve prepared for upcoming exams.”

“Yuu-san,” he frowned at you, standing up. “You’re walking on thin ice.”

“You wanted me to prove my powers, right? I did just so and I’m guaranteeing you’ll receive all of my power once you… fall in love with me.”

You lowered your gaze, and Azul wondered why would it even change so drastically, going from cheeky and sly to filled with sadness he couldn’t describe.

“... Alright,” he sighed, closing his eyes and fixing his glasses. “Let us sign a contract.”

“Oya thank you~” You giggled, grabbing a pen on the table, ready to sign. “I know feelings are hard to acquire, but please fall in love quickly, okay?~”

“We’ll see. Don’t forget you need to tell me everything once it’s over.”

“I won’t! He-he.”

You’re the one who’s going to forget.

“Uhm, Yuu-san…”

“Yeah?”

“Don’t you find this position quite, uhm…”

“Hm?”

“No, nothing…”

You giggled with a soft exhale into the crook of Ashengrotto’s neck, thinking about how to escape the predicament you both happened to be trapped in.

You met him after his classes were over, waiting for him to come out from the auditorium, but only had he stepped out, he grabbed your hand and walked you away, accompanied by his classmates noises, hearing something among ‘Woah Azul’s dating someone???’ lines.

And then you realized he never intended to reveal your relationship status, and if the first two weeks went quite okay with you going on fake dates, no one managed to spot you. Or so Azul thought, but you knew Jade also figured out what kind of request you make, glancing over and smiling with an emotion you couldn’t understand. 

So today he accidentally led you two into an extremely small staff room of the Mostro Lounge where mops were stored, escaping other workers’ stares. And it wouldn’t be a problem if Azul didn’t hear Floyd approaching you two. 

So now you found yourself ‘trapped’ in here, your bodies being tangled, which seemed funny to you, while Azul was going crazy, his cheeks glowing crimson in a dim light radiating from one small lamp in the room.

“Ouch, Yuu-san, be careful.”

“The same goes to you!”

His hands on your back made you bite your lower lip when Azul tried fixing his position, but to no avail. You had no other choice but to be pressed to his chest, head empty of thoughts and common sense. 

“Argh, Ashengrotto, you seriously!—”

“Shh!! Floyd’s coming.”

He managed to press a finger to your lips, and you remembered why you found otome games strange in the first place. All those silly situations like this were so stupid and unrealistic when you were recovering after experiencing literal hell in thrillers, but now? Now you were melting under his careful movements and focused eyes fixated on the gap in the door, fishing out Floyd. 

You fell silent, averting your gaze, and felt Azul’s slow breath. Your legs went numb, and when you wanted to change your pose just slightly, you felt Azul’s grip on you tightening, and blushed. 

“Uhm, Ashen—”

“Yuu— Ugh, can’t you just—”

“Aha~ Did I just hear Koebi-chan?~”

You tensed, clenching Azul’s necktie and panicking just slightly when you heard Floyd’s voice.

“Where are you two?~”

“Ashengrotto, I think we should—”

“Yuu-san, just shut up already!!”

“But I might fall just—”

He turned to you with the brightest color of red on his cheeks, grabbing your chin and drawing your face to his, shutting you up with a kiss.

You could have sworn you saw Jade’s intense stare for a mere second, and then also him talking to Floyd.

“Floyd, here you are. Azul told me we’re needed in the kitchen.”

“Eh? But I don’t wanna~”

“Let’s go.”

“But Ja~ade!”

You two parted with a soft sound of Azul’s nervous breath, and he shifted his gaze immediately after you stared at him blankly. 

“A-Ashengrotto…”

“You’re hopeless, Yuu-san…”

“Sorry… O-oh…”

You noticed how pink liquid filled the heart to the half and inhaled sharply, grabbing Azul’s hand when he was going to open the door.

“W-what?”

“Uhm, nothing… sorry again.”

The kiss made you lose your mind for a moment or two. You needed Azul to fall in love with you as soon as possible before you fell for him yourself. 

“Ashengrotto.”

“Yes, Yuu-san?”

“Go take a rest. It’s painful to see you working so hard. I haven’t seen you sleeping for two days.”

Azul sighed, fixing his glasses, and continued writing something. 

“Of course, you don’t see me sleeping, because I do that in Octavinelle.” 

“I highly doubt that…”

You fell silent, sorting out the contracts he made, and stumbled upon a request similar to yours, gasping.

“What’s the matter?”

“Someone asked you to date them,” you frowned. “But you declined.”

“Of course I did.”

“But why? Didn’t you say you fulfill any wish?”

“Yuu-san.”

He stopped writing, sanding up and getting on one knee before you, causing you to blush a little.

“Because right at the moment I’m dating you… no, not just that,” he took your hand in his. “I’m falling in love with you, Yuu-san.”

You bit your lip, lowering your gaze and knitting brows together. It ached so excruciatingly right in your chest, you hated every moment of everything happening just as much you loved it. You…

“I have a question,” you said. “Have you not still fallen in love with me?”

“One more word, and I’ll start hating you instead, but…”

He placed his head on your knees, making you flustered.

“A-Ashengrotto?!”

“Yuu-san, first of all… There’s two things restraining me from loving you with all my heart.”

“Oh, I’m… All ears.”

“First,” he looked at you, pouting with a cute pinkish hue on his cheeks and ears. “Have you ever dated someone before?”

“O-oh?” You found yourself startled. “To be honest, yes, I have. Why?”

“Did you call them by their surname, too?”

“No,” you answered immediately.

“Then why do you call me by my last name?”

There was a reasoning behind that, but you couldn't even clearly judge yourself for your stupid decisions, so you remained silent, receiving his sigh as an answer.

“Fine. The second question possesses more importance anyway. Why don’t you allow yourself to love and be loved?”

You jolted, escaping his serious look, and not daring to give him an answer. You begged for the heart to fill up this instant, but Azul’s stoic gaze remained strict. 

“The answer is related to the secret I’m going to reveal when you finally fall in love.”

“And what if I tell you I already did?”

You smiled bitterly at him, interweaving your fingers with his. 

“You didn’t,” you laughed. “I know you didn’t. And you know it too.”

“Is it related to that knowledge of yours?”

“Correct,” you nodded. “I know how you feel.”

“It might be funny hearing from me, but Yuu-san. You can never know what one feels, even if in reality you had the magic helping you reveal people’s feelings all this time, or anything else — you can’t. Otherwise you wouldn’t say I don’t love you yet.”

You fell silent again. But the system couldn’t lie, the liquid of the heart was still on its half, so was he lying to you at this point? He wasn’t. You knew that too.

Will you believe the system or him, Azul Ashengrotto, his cold hands holding yours, cold too? 

It was insane. It was an absolutely absurd, stupid mess you hated with all your heart. The support and consideration of your own feelings Azul demonstrated to you made you go crazy with a warmth blossoming in your chest.  

“Azul…”

“Huh.”

He raised his head, meeting your surprised expression, being quite astonished himself, and smiled at you, clenching a piece of shirt in his fist.

“You really… What a controversial figure you are, Yuu.”

“Hey, I… Wait. No, no, Azul, wait!!”

“What’s with you?”

Bright light flowing around you made you burst into tears at once, throwing yourself into his embrace and crying hopelessly, him not realizing what was happening. 

“I,” you sucked in the air, cupping his cheeks and smiling at him. “I came from another dimension and I’ve got two more people’s stories to finish. Y-you, you were my fourth story in this mess, and… Argh, no, please, give me one more minute, I’m begging!!”

“Yuu?!”

You felt how the light was tying up your limbs, and despite your miserable attempts at escaping, it ached. It was not your body aching, but your very heart.

“Please forget about me. Don’t carry my secret, the next time we meet pretend you never felt anything for me. Forget me and.. Thank you, Azul.”

“Yuu!” He cried out, grabbing your hand for a brief moment before you almost dissolved in the air. “Thank you. Thank you for showing me love and letting me fall for you…”

Opening your eyes in the room in Ramshackle you shared with Grim, you’ve decided that you would rather suffer yourself than letting others experience that pain with you. 

Lilia Vanrouge and Idia Shroud are going to be different, you thought, seeing 100% difficulty level under Lilia’s icon in the system, trying to ignore the ‘COMPLETED’ line under Azul’s image, but sweet and salty scent of sea waves made you chuckle nervously and swallow your despair all at once. 

— tag-list : @coffee-or-hot-cocoa @red-viewe @68thsposts

© yunarim 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐝. 𝐝𝐨 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐫𝐞𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭, 𝐜𝐨𝐩𝐲, 𝐦𝐨𝐝𝐢𝐟𝐲, 𝐨𝐫 𝐜𝐥𝐚𝐢𝐦 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐬 𝐚𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐨𝐰𝐧.

[twistedwonderlandimaginesblog]

(Saw someone do this and decided it seemed fun~

link to my ao3 here)

How many works do you have on AO3?

85.

What's your total AO3 word count?

915,568 words~

 What fandoms do you write for?

Currently it’s for Helios Rising Heroes, Hypnosis Mic, Obey Me, Paradox Live, and Twisted Wonderland!

I’ve previously written for A3!, Ace Attorney, Ace of Diamond, Borderlands, Bungou Stray Dogs, Free!, Fire Emblem Three Houses, Fire Force, Gorillaz, Hero Academia, Kuroko no Basuke, Magi, Naruto, Red Dead Redemption, Run with the Wind, RWBY, Shokugeki no Souma, Stardew Valley, Tokyo Ghoul

Top five fics by kudos?

A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes [Twisted Wonderland] – 6,298

We’d Be a Hit Together [Haikyuu!!] – 6,211

Super Powered Love [My Hero Academia] – 5,436

A Devil’s Bride [Obey Me!] – 3,583

I Need Love [Hypnosis Mic] – 1,928

Do you respond to comments?

I try to! I always read and appreciate comments made on my posts, on AO3 and Tumblr, I always check to see if someone has tagged it with commentary <3

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

To be fair I hurt Malleus with the whole ‘you’re likely someone with a shorter lifespan’ idea constantly, but The Brightest Star was definitely a sadder one from my KNB days.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Most of them because I truly hate unhappy endings. You can probably tell just from how I write that I try to put a positive spin on things, but I am trying to just let the angst happen or leave things off with ambiguity rather than specifying that a character only seems to feel a certain way when they’re actually feeling something else entirely.

Do you get hate on fics?

Occasionally. I remember getting this angry message about me being a feminist because I made the reader like dom Hanamiya from KNB and they were MAAAAD about it lmao I also remember being on fanfic dot net and getting argued with and I just sent the brady bunch theme song over and over until they stopped messaging me back

Do you write smut?

I do! Not the biggest fan of it honestly because I never feel like it’s half as sexy as the things I read other people write, but I do get in moods and with certain characters they just need to be manhandled a lil, you know?

Craziest crossover?

I have never written a crossover in my LIFE

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Awhile back I did but I was told about it and the story was quickly taken down, I think it was on Wattpad or something like that.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

I have! I’ve gotten a handful of requests for my more popular ones to get translated, I don’t mind at all!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I mean I’m co-writing a book with the other admin on this blog, so does that count?

All time favorite ship?

Me and all my lil husbands.

What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I was writing this Criminal Minds fanfic that I had all plotted out, dramatic quotes at the beginning of episodes already picked, but I don’t think I’ll ever bother focusing on it.

What are your writing strengths?

I would say characterization is my strength! The characters are the best parts of fanfics after all and I always try to do research on the characters I write; if they’re ones I don’t know as well I’ll scan the wiki and read extra stories with them in it just to get a better handle on them! It’s why when there’s characters that haven’t been around long enough or don’t have a lot of content translated for them that I don’t like writing for them because I need at least something to go off of, I don’t want to have to make up their personality myself

What are your writing weaknesses?

Details. Which is a horrible thing to say as a writer, but I do feel like my writing lacks details here and there. Like with dialogue, I’ve been trying to write more in-between actions while the characters are talking since most people aren’t just standing still, especially if a character was doing something before another person entered the room. Descriptions of the world around the characters

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

I don’t like using google translate but I do have characters I love who speak other languages. Those heinous Hetalia days where you’d randomly put a word into the middle of an otherwise english sentence… they haunt me. But what I try to do with Citron from A3 is write some of his dialogue in parentheses to show he’s speaking in a language that the reader might not understand, and I feel like that works a little better for someone who doesn’t speak anything but english to do for the sake of not butchering another language.

First fandom you wrote in?

I truly wish I knew. I know I wrote for Naruto back in the day, and The Outsiders was one of the first full length fics I did. But that was back on Quizilla which has since turned to dust. I was also on Lunaescence for a while, whose creators have also turned to dust apparently. What a world

Favourite fic you've written?

It’s hard to pic just one when most of my fics are like, stand-alone short little things. But I think one I’m very fond of (which was written for the other admin so it explains why I put so much effort into it) was Snowy Mountain Getaway, which was a FE3H Dimitri/Reader College AU fic.

[paraliveimaginesblog]

(Saw someone do this and decided it seemed fun~ also posted to my TWST blog

link to my ao3 here)

How many works do you have on AO3?

85.

What's your total AO3 word count?

915,568 words~

 What fandoms do you write for?

Currently it’s for Helios Rising Heroes, Hypnosis Mic, Obey Me, Paradox Live, and Twisted Wonderland!

I’ve previously written for A3!, Ace Attorney, Ace of Diamond, Borderlands, Bungou Stray Dogs, Free!, Fire Emblem Three Houses, Fire Force, Gorillaz, Hero Academia, Kuroko no Basuke, Magi, Naruto, Red Dead Redemption, Run with the Wind, RWBY, Shokugeki no Souma, Stardew Valley, Tokyo Ghoul

Top five fics by kudos?

A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes [Twisted Wonderland] – 6,298

We’d Be a Hit Together [Haikyuu!!] – 6,211

Super Powered Love [My Hero Academia] – 5,436

A Devil’s Bride [Obey Me!] – 3,583

I Need Love [Hypnosis Mic] – 1,928

Do you respond to comments?

I try to! I always read and appreciate comments made on my posts, on AO3 and Tumblr, I always check to see if someone has tagged it with commentary <3

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

To be fair I hurt Malleus with the whole ‘you’re likely someone with a shorter lifespan’ idea constantly, but The Brightest Star was definitely a sadder one from my KNB days.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Most of them because I truly hate unhappy endings. You can probably tell just from how I write that I try to put a positive spin on things, but I am trying to just let the angst happen or leave things off with ambiguity rather than specifying that a character only seems to feel a certain way when they’re actually feeling something else entirely.

Do you get hate on fics?

Occasionally. I remember getting this angry message about me being a feminist because I made the reader like dom Hanamiya from KNB and they were MAAAAD about it lmao I also remember being on fanfic dot net and getting argued with and I just sent the brady bunch theme song over and over until they stopped messaging me back

Do you write smut?

I do! Not the biggest fan of it honestly because I never feel like it’s half as sexy as the things I read other people write, but I do get in moods and with certain characters they just need to be manhandled a lil, you know?

Craziest crossover?

I have never written a crossover in my LIFE

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Awhile back I did but I was told about it and the story was quickly taken down, I think it was on Wattpad or something like that.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

I have! I’ve gotten a handful of requests for my more popular ones to get translated, I don’t mind at all!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I mean I’m co-writing a book with the other admin on this blog, so does that count?

All time favorite ship?

Me and all my lil husbands.

What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I was writing this Criminal Minds fanfic that I had all plotted out, dramatic quotes at the beginning of episodes already picked, but I don’t think I’ll ever bother focusing on it.

What are your writing strengths?

I would say characterization is my strength! The characters are the best parts of fanfics after all and I always try to do research on the characters I write; if they’re ones I don’t know as well I’ll scan the wiki and read extra stories with them in it just to get a better handle on them! It’s why when there’s characters that haven’t been around long enough or don’t have a lot of content translated for them that I don’t like writing for them because I need at least something to go off of, I don’t want to have to make up their personality myself

What are your writing weaknesses?

Details. Which is a horrible thing to say as a writer, but I do feel like my writing lacks details here and there. Like with dialogue, I’ve been trying to write more in-between actions while the characters are talking since most people aren’t just standing still, especially if a character was doing something before another person entered the room. Descriptions of the world around the characters

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

I don’t like using google translate but I do have characters I love who speak other languages. Those heinous Hetalia days where you’d randomly put a word into the middle of an otherwise english sentence… they haunt me. But what I try to do with Citron from A3 is write some of his dialogue in parentheses to show he’s speaking in a language that the reader might not understand, and I feel like that works a little better for someone who doesn’t speak anything but english to do for the sake of not butchering another language.

First fandom you wrote in?

I truly wish I knew. I know I wrote for Naruto back in the day, and The Outsiders was one of the first full length fics I did. But that was back on Quizilla which has since turned to dust. I was also on Lunaescence for a while, whose creators have also turned to dust apparently. What a world

Favourite fic you've written?

It’s hard to pic just one when most of my fics are like, stand-alone short little things. But I think one I’m very fond of (which was written for the other admin so it explains why I put so much effort into it) was Snowy Mountain Getaway, which was a FE3H Dimitri/Reader College AU fic.

[kaytheday]

I'd love to see a snippet from #2 for the tag challenge!!

Yes, I’ve actually written a ton for this one, so I’ll include the first 1000 words below the cut. This is through the eyes of an OC. She came to Tulsa because her dad kicked her out and she meets Soda on her first day there. Later in the story she tries to get custody of her baby brother Oliver from her father. She goes to Darry for help because he has experience with social workers.

I know a lot of people don’t like OC’s, but I do because I get more ideas for longer fics about them and it makes it easier to write in the first person.

I have officially published this as a fic on a03! Link here!

Anyway… The first 1000 words are below the cut.

I try in vain to keep my eyes dry as I prepare to go into the gas station. I needed gas for my car but I wasn’t about to break down crying in front of the gas station attendant. Not after I basically cried the entire 7 hour drive here. So I wiped my eyes and took a deep breath, trying not to think about Mississippi and Oliver and what kind of peril I was leaving him in. I put shaking hands into my coat pockets and forced a smile on my face as I entered the gas station.

“Evenin’ miss, what can I do you for?” It was a sweet boy manning the counter, he looked about my age with golden brown hair and fine features. He was grinning too big for his face as he looked at me expectantly.

“Hi, I just needed some gas.” I hand him the $3 I’ve been fingering and he smiles big again putting it into the register.

“Sure, you…” I look at his hair and think of Olivers baby blonde hair, I should never have left him. I shouldn’t have trusted my father and left him in that house. My eyes snap back into focus and I see the worker looking at me strangely, that smile still on his face.

“Sorry, what did you say?”

“I asked you if you wanted me to pump your gas for you?”

“You guys do that here?”

“Yeah,” He smiled. “Well when we’re bored enough and the customer is mighty pretty.” I smiled slightly, hardly mustering the energy to say thank you. I knew I was probably coming off as strange and spacey, but I couldn't bring myself to care. It wasn’t like I would ever see this handsome stranger again.

I followed him out to my car and watched as he pumped the gas.

“Mississippi plates, huh?” He asked. “You visiting family?”

“Something like that. I just moved here for the rest of the school year.”

“Oh, cool.” He asked me a couple more things about Mississippi while I glazed over the questions. I really didn’t want to lay my troubles on some random gas station employee.

He finished, I smiled and thanked him, setting on my way to find some address in a crappy neighborhood. My aunt probably didn’t expect me to be coming this early. I didn’t care, I was exhausted and I just wanted to go to sleep. I drove in circles not being able to find this stupid house. Then I decided it might just be easier to ask someone walking on the street. They’d know this town better then me. So I stopped the next guy I found. He was wearing a ball cap, blue jeans, and a brown coat over a blue button up.

“Excuse me…” when he turned around, I saw it was the same guy working from the gas station.His face broke out into a big goofy smile.

“Well hello again, miss Mississippi.”

“Hi.” I said sheepishly.

“Just couldn’t leave me alone, could ya?”

“I guess not, I was just wondering if you could help me find this address. But I can give you a ride home so you don’t have to walk in the cold.” He smiled again.

“Sure.” I unlocked the car and he hopped in, starting directions to his house. In between directions I managed to get my bearings and ask him about himself. It was better if I could focus the conversation on him.I learned he was the middle of three boys, his parents had died, and he’d lived in Tulsa before we got to his house. Two cars were already parked out front. It was a humble home with red brick pillars and a white finish.

“Your castle awaits, prince.” I joked as he started to open the door. He laughed and turned to look at me seriously.

“Do you have dinner plans?” I shook my head sheepishly, I had planned on getting to my aunts and going straight to bed. “Do you want dinner plans? I think it’s just me and my brothers tonight.” I weighed my options. He seemed nice enough and it warmed my heart that at least one person would be excited about my presence in Tulsa. My aunt definitely wouldn’t care.

“Sure.” I parked the car and he opened the door for me as I got out. “My name is Robin by the way.”

“Sodapop Curtis.” He grinned and we officially shook hands. We went inside and I followed suit as he took his shoes and coat off. There were sounds coming from the kitchen. An auburn haired boy who looked like Sodapop was sitting at the kitchen counter reading while another older boy was stirring something in a pot.

“Hey Sodapop.” The big one said without looking up. And golly he was big. He had arms that were big enough to kill me. He looked up, his eyes crinkling at the corners. He looked at Sodapop lovingly, then he saw me and looked confused.

“Oh, yeah. This is Robin, she’s new in town so I invited her for dinner.” I smiled and put my hand up in a sort of half wave. “Robin, this is my big brother Darry and my little brother Ponyboy.” Ponyboy waved without looking up from his book while Darry strode forward to shake my hand. His grip was firm and his eye contact was unwavering. Up close it became obvious that he could easily kill me. But instead he smiled and welcomed me.

“Well, we’re happy to have you Robin, you can sit down, dinner will be ready in a couple minutes.” I assumed he was making pasta from the pot and the shredded cheese on the table.

“Thanks, is there anything I can help with?”

“Not at this point.” Soda had disappeared upstairs and I was left to sit at the table with Ponyboy. He was reading what looked like a Jack London book. I started to say something, but thought better of it and focused on my hands in my lap.

“So Robin,” Darry started. “Soda said you’re new in town. Where are you from?” These questions were easy.

“I’m from Mississippi, Batesville if you know where that is.”

“I haven't, but then again I’ve never been to Mississippi. What brings you to Tulsa?” I remembered a trick I’d learned early on. To avoid answering a question you didn’t want to answer, you just had to fill the response with fluff so it made it seem like you had answered it.

“I came to finish out the school year. I heard that schools here were better than the ones in Batesville. But this is a much better town than Batesville is already. I mean… inviting me into your home and all. Thanks again for this by the way, nobody in Batesville would ever do something like this.” Before I can overthink any of those statements and how desperate and pathetic they sound, Darry just laughs a little.

“Of course, it’s no big deal. Most of the time we have seven hungry boys here for dinner. I always cook more than I need to anyway.” I smile and let out a little sigh of relief. At least he cooked more food than he needed to anyway. Before Darry can ask any more questions, Sodapop comes bounding down the stairs in jeans and a white T-shirt. He’s still smiling and I’m starting to think that his face is permanently like that.

“Soda, set the table, would you?”

“Sure.” Soda says and starts setting stuff out. Ponyboy finally puts his book up. It’s Call of the Wild.

“Are you reading that for school?” I ask.

“Yeah, it’s not so bad though.”

“Yeah, I always liked reading Jack London. The Sea Wolf was my favorite.” He smiles slightly and begins chattering about Call of the Wild and its similarities to White Fang. Darry finishes and we all dish up our food. We sit down and Sodapop begins telling a story about an old man that threatened to fight his co-worker Steve the other day. I’m glad the dinner feels normal, I think I might have started crying if it was an interrogation. Then they ask Ponyboy questions about school. The kid seems quiet and in his head, but I can tell that they both love him so much. As much as I love Oliver.After dinner, I insist on helping with the dishes. I wash while Sodapop drys. Then I plan to make my leave.

“Well, thank you so much for dinner Darry. Very good to meet all of you but I should get going.”

“You're welcome, very good to meet you too Robin.” Darry says, then he smiles and goes back to what he was doing.

“Yeah,” Ponyboy says quietly. “Good to meet you too.” Then he heads upstairs to his room.

“I’ll walk you out to your car.” Sodapop says and I almost melt at how sincere he sounds. He holds my arm as I walk down the steps. The cold biting at me through my coat.

“Are you sure you’re going to be okay tonight? It’s a pretty far drive.” I smiled, laughing softly at his joke. My aunt's house was only a couple streets away.

“Yeah, I’ll be fine. Thank you so much for this by the way. It’s been really nice to meet some new people here.”

“Of course.” Then he fumbles into his jean pocket, pulling out a slip of paper with some scrappy handwriting on it. “Here is our home phone number. You can call if you ever need a place to sleep or eat, or anything like that.” I smile and turn to stare at the ground.

“Thanks Soda. This means a lot.”

“Sure.” He says, grinning from ear to ear. “Drive home safe, will ya?”

“Yeah, I’ll see you around.”

“Yeah, see you around.” So I leave, driving down a couple streets to a place that I know I’m not wanted.

I have finally published this as a fic on a03! I will include the link here!

[1lostsoul0fishbowl]

Twenty Questions for Fic Writers

Tagged by the absolutely lovely @staceymcgillicuddy and my wondrous darling @pearlypairings - thank you both! 🥰

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

15, 13 of which are complete and the last two very nearly finished. 😭

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

365,528 and counting. I’m a rambler!

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Only Stranger Things… nothing else has grabbed my attention quite the way s4 did.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

With a Little Help From My Friends (my ultra-long found family fic)

Why Should I Cry For You (that one surprised me, it came from way behind!)

Not-so-iron Maiden (Eddie & Max sibling supremacy)

Tattoos and Trash Talk (Eddie and El bonding)

the shield and the shepherd (my very first fic! Eddie and Chrissy falling in love without Vecna in the way)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do! I’m absolutely tickled every time somebody likes something I wrote enough that they take the time to leave me a comment about it. I’ve even made a few friends that way!

6. What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Probably Into the Shining Sun? Even then, it’s angst with a very hopeful note to it. There’s enough angst in my real life; I like everything in my fics to turn out okay.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

So far, With a Little Help, because it ended with Eddie and Chrissy’s wedding!

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Thankfully, I haven’t. I honestly think it will break my heart if it ever happens. I stumbled completely by accident across a post here on tumblr hating on GreatMage and I literally cried about that for two days. (Shameful!)

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Nope, I live firmly in the fluff zone. All of my fics are rated a very mild T.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Haven’t tried one yet, but maybe someday, if I can think of a good idea!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of. How would I even know that? 🤔

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not yet, but @pearlypairings and I have kicked around a few fun ideas and someday we are going to make Clarkelley happen!

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

This is a nearly impossible question.

15. What’s a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

I’ve only got two WIPs and they’re both almost done, so— none!

16. What are your writing strengths?

Omg, I don’t even know, honestly. Umm… I guess building friendships and relationships between characters?

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Anything outside of my comfort zone. I have a tiny little box I tend to stay in, and refuse to even try branching out.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

With the help of Google Translate, I’ve scattered some bits of Welsh dialogue here and there throughout Next Time I Fall. Apparently I got most of it wrong. So I don’t think I’ll try any other languages unless I’m actually familiar with them!

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Probably X-Files? And then there was that random embarrassing NSYNC stuff… we won’t talk about that. Those were all just scribbled in old journals, though. I never actually posted anything publicly until I found Ao3 last year.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

I think each one is my favorite while I’m working on it! But I think I have to say Next Time I Fall, because the response to it was so much more than I expected, and people’s engagement with and investment in the story has given me so much joy.

Randomly tagging @tnmdfhgkg @saltyseagoat83 @sokkas-first-fangirl

and for anyone else who sees this and feels like sharing, 🫵 *boop* I tag you!

[perfectlysunny02]

twenty questions for fic writers!

tagged by: @26-cats-in-a-trenchcoat and @actuallyitsellie

1. How many works do you have an AO3?

76

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

228,642

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Only 911 right now but I used to write for Lockwood & Co, Hades, Hogwarts Legacy, Choices, Stranger Things, Suits, and LITG

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

all i know since yesterday is everything has changed

could you keep me close? could you love me most?

I’ll chase the Irony

you keep his shirt, he keeps his word

right now i wish you were here with me

5. Do you respond to comments? Why? Why not?

i used too and then i stopped because i never get to them right away now and they pile up and i get anxious thinking about responding to all of them

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

i’m sunny, this could qualify for like half my work😂 probably i’ve pleaded with the powers and their plans. i don’t know.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

all i know

8. Do you get hate on fics?

yeah i think it comes with the territory and the jumping ship. also buddie_the_shipper exists, so like 💁🏻‍♀️

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

yeah but it’s like as less smut as i can get it because im not comfortable with it yet.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've ever written?

i do! i’ve done a lot of 911 and 911 lone star and then there’s tell me how much hurt can a heart take before it breaks (im changing that title, who let me make it so long???) which has John Nolan from the Rookie and TK Strand from 911 lone star.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

no but i had that one girl try a couple times😂

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

yes, it was in Russian and i don’t actually know who did it or where they posted it, they sent me the link but i never had any time to look.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

yeah, mostly with @whatisreggieshortfor but i did one with @actuallyitsellie

14. What's your all time favorite ship?

Bucktommy.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

swore on the bottle, baby, i’d never leave you but it’s because it’s buddie and i don’t really ship buddie anymore so it’s a chore to write.

16. What are your writing strengths?

angst😂 Reginald one time told me I was good at ripping out people’s hearts.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

i switch tenses a lot like sometimes even in the middle of the same sentence.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

i don’t really mind it. i’d prefer have to the translation in the notes or something but i don’t mind looking it up.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

pretty sure it was hunger games and i was 12😂

20. Favorite fics you've written?

probably any of my bucktommy, although i was really proud of the first i’ll chase and Heal, and you can hear it in the silence (you are in love)

tagging: @desert--moonchild @theotherbuckley @diazsdimples @kinardsevan @racerchix21 @sunnywithachanceofbi @wikiangela @hyperfocusthusly (and i’m not sure how much of my followers are writers and who isn’t so use me as if you want to do it and no one’s tagged you.)

[blurglesmurfklaine]

20 Questions For Fic Writers

gonna unofficially thank @forabeatofadrum for this tag bc she said whoever wanted to do it and I wanted to so here it be!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

49??? What when how did that happen??

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

706,964 woah so not quite a million but uh I have shit to say apparently

3. What fandoms do you write for?

46 of the 49 fics are glee lmaooo, two are Newsies and one is Roswell, New Mexico! I anticipate more Newsies (Javid) fics to come because I’m obsessed

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

There From The Start

Cornelia Street

Here We Go Again

An Honest Man

If Music Be

All for Glee: Klaine!

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I try to respond to as many as I can, but I usually forget lol. If someone leaves an insightful comment though it will usually spur a long conversation in the comments and I LOVE IT

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

If The World Was Ending bc they uh :) die, technically speaking

7. What��s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Uhhhh probably every other one??? I really don’t like sad endings so most have a happy ending, but i actually really like the ending to Stick Season because despite it being so terribly emotional and angsty, I feel like the ending is a turnaround and really hopeful!

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Not really? A few annoying comments telling me characters wouldn’t act this way, and one asking me “where my creativity was” which rubbed me the wrong way but I try to focus on the positive ones! Those definitely linger in my mind longer 💞

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Don’t look at me. Yes. Sometimes. Idk man sometimes those dudes just need to fuck it out???? But I usually only write it if the story feels like it’s naturally going there. It’s never really porn for porn’s sake (for clarification there’s nothing wrong with that we all love a little pwp), it’s usually the sappy emotional kind that’s mostly feelings and vague descriptions. it’s definitely not my forte and something I still get a little embarrassed and self conchas about lmao

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

Not recently but I did have a Supernatural/Glee crossover a few years ago (shut up I was 16) and honestly it was loads of fun! Blaine was the child of that Gay Angel and Repressed Bisexual Man. Absolutely a slay

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I don’t think so? But a few old ones from my fanfiction dot net page ended up on one of those search engine thingies??? Idk how to explain it or how to take it down but honestly… I have bigger problems lol

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No but if anyone ever wants to let me know!!! It would make me so happy!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yeah! Quite a few actually. I usually do the franken-fic every year and I did the roulette challenge and that m aforementioned crossover was actually a collab! Some of my favorite memories was writing the final chapter of A Night At The Ryerson House with @esperantoauthor 💞

14. What’s your all time favourite ship?

OOF. Okay so. With 46 fics on AO3 you could say Klaine has a special place in my heart, buuuuuuut…….. my best friend introduced me to newsies in April and I seriously think it did something to my brain chemistry because Jack and Davey own my entire ass

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Ugh. I’m so fearful that I’ll never finish Amidst The Chaos, which I LOVE but takes so much out of me. There’s also one I’ve never posted called “Strangers Again” that involves like timeline jumping but in a romcom way that I’m not sure how to go about??? Also the community college one. I have so many.

For Javey I tried writing that Spider-Man AU but like. I need to re do the entire first chapter. I absolutely hate it actually and I think it’s because I don’t have a clear vision of what exactly I want, but I know what I DO NOT want????

16. What are your writing strengths?

Uhhhhhhhhhhh I’m actually not sure entirely? I’m gonna go with dialogue bc that’s usually how scenes come to me first.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Scenery/setting/sensory, world building, plot points, physical movement holy fuck do not get me started when That Guy has to move Across The Room AHHHHHH I wanna tear my face off

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Love it! In my brain Jack Kelly is Mexican because I love to project, and I’ve got a wip where Blaine is involved in a Hispanic community (no he’s mot Hispanic he’s just got a Mexican friend who is an old lady and also Catholicism is involved it’s a lot to explain okay go with it) so I like to use it, but only in a way that feels natural to ME based on MY experiences. Different people have different approaches!

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Glee!

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Oof. This one is hard but I think it’s an even tie between Here We Go Again and If Music Be!

Tagging: @somefeministtheatrepls @somanywords @justgleekout @kurtsascot and anyone else who wants to try!

[hetalia-club]

If no one else is going to say it then I will. You are one of the funniest Hetalia blogs on this website. Maybe even fandom blogs period (and I follow a lot of them). Your humor is just so…idk…I feel like you are one of those people who has something to say about everything. I want to talk to you IRL. The smash or pass thing you made with Hetalia characters was absolute gold from start to finish. The sound effects, music and everything you said about all the characters. You had me ugly laughing. It’s like an art for where you managed to make something that should have been completely cringy just unserious and lighthearted as possible. You passed on my bae Prussia and I can’t even be mad about because what you said was so funny. I even showed it to my friends who don’t even like hetalia much and they still thought it was hilarious. The tags you leave on things, posts you make, not even just about what you say about hetalia either. Just your stories from real life. Maybe it’s just how you word things Idk. The way you type i can hear someone saying it if that makes since I don’t feel like you embellish I feel like you actually talk like that. I feel like things you make here go under appreciated even if you are one of the main big blogs here and you have been for years.

PP; Could you please release the script or bloopers from the smash or pass? I really need to know what you said that wasn’t used.

PPS; I was going to not use anonymous but I got shy half way though and switched.

That was honestly so nice of you to say 🥺

Thank you so much! You’re so sweet.

You kind of caught me in the spot here I don’t really know what to say other than thank you so much and I appreciate and love all of you.

I’m glad I make you laugh and you enjoy the things I make! Don’t worry about it going ‘under appreciated’ or anything though. I don’t really have a blog for notes or internet popularity. I have this blog because I really like hetalia and I just make content that I want to see. It is just an added bounds so many of you enjoy it! Really asks like this are worth 10,000 notes to me.

I am glad a few of you have reached out personally to tell me how much you liked the smash or pass I made. I had a lot of fun making it to so it’s always a plus when you guys like something that I liked making. I’m glad you and your friends were amused by me 🤣 someone has to be!

As for a ‘script’ of the video it doesn’t really exist. I didn’t write any jokes or stuff down it was just off the top of my head in the moment I was doing lines. I just stared at pictures of the character and spoke from the heart. I don’t feel like it would have been near as well received if I actually wrote a script. I didn’t even plan on doing the Romano thirst trap at the end it just sort of happened. There was a general outline of things I knew I wanted to do as far as photoshop wise and characters I was going to cover. I got pretty severe unmedicated ADHD so if I don’t finish something when I start it it’ll just never get done. So I’m not really one for planning things I make too much because if I do I’ll get bored or side tracked and forget it exists.

If you guys wanted to make a version of the video yourself and don’t really have any idea how to do something like that you can get a hold of me and I will gladly give over the templates of the characters stills. Or if a lot of people ask I’ll just make a master post for everyone to use

For your PPS. You were probably just shy to be posted and that’s okay I would be to lol. But I hope you weren’t intimidated by me. That’s not the vibes I try and give off. I’m not mean or scary at all I promise I’ll talk to any of you about anything!

[theflagscene]

Twenty Questions for Fic Writers

I was tagged by @tazzy-ace ☺️

1 - How many works do you have on AO3?

I have 37 works, 7 of those are part of series.

2 - What’s your total AO3 word count?

255,686.

3 - What fandoms do you write for?

I’ll write for any fandom, if I know enough about it at least. But the fandoms I have fics on AO3 are; The Falcon and The Winter Soldier, Supernatural, Not Me, The Eclipse, Semantic Error, Between Us and Never Let Me Go.

4 - What are your top 5 fics by Kudos?

Do I Ever Cross Your Mind? / E / (Not Me/The Eclipse)

There Is No Normal / E / (Supernatural)

Want A Do Over? / T / (The Eclipse)

In The Light Of The Morning / M / (The Eclipse)

When The Darkness Comes / T / (The Eclipse)

5 - Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes and no, it depends on the comment and how I’m feeling. I know I seem like a loud mouth on here, but I’m actually extremely shy and have generalized anxiety disorder, so interacting with people - even online - can cause me a lot of anxiety so it can be difficult to reply to ever comment.

6 - What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Hmm, I don’t know. I don’t think any of my fics actually end with angst, start with it, run with it or just are angsty in general but I typically try and make endings at the very least hopeful.

7 - What’s a fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

There Is No Normal, I would say that one is the happiest ending for sure. It ends with a proposal and a happily ever after, domestic bliss with a dog and a kid and a happy group of friends and family.

8 - Do you get hate on fics?

Nah, I legit have the best readers on the planet. The sweetest people, who I love to interact with. The closest thing I got to hate would be one little complaint during a Big Bang I was in because I alluded to a character being a switch instead of a strict top, someone saw that and went to the mods to complain instead of coming directly to me. So I absolutely did not change it, because screw their petty ass lol.

9 - Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

All kinds, I’ll write all types of smut featuring all types of genders and sexualities. I’m also willing to try to write any kink (within reason) but that doesn’t mean I’ll write it well lol, I make no promises, I might be total shit at writing a type of smut I’ve never written before.

10 - Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest crossover you’ve ever written?

Yes, I do write crossovers. I think the craziest is actually an unpublished fic that is a crossover of Supernatural and The Void, which is a Canadian made Lovecraftian horror movie from 2016.

11 - Have you ever had a fic stolen?

If so, its not come to my attention.

12 - Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yep, I’m always happy to link to any translations of my works on the original fic, so I always remind translators to drop me a line with a link so I can post it.

13 - Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes, I have a co-author that I’ve worked with for like a decade now. I trust them with so much, we work together amazingly well.

14 - What’s your all time favourite ship?

Bro, I’m supposed to have one!? Impossible to answer, no way, next question lol.

15 - What’s a WIP that you want to finish, doubt you ever will?

I’m not really sure, I wanna think that all my WIPs will eventually get done. Because of how my mental health fluctuates, I tend to not to like posting chaptered WIPs because I don’t like leaving people waiting. Which is probably why I only have a couple posted, those ones will absolutely get done. As for non-posted WIPs, well… since they’re not posted there will be no proof of them not getting done. 😈😈

16 - What are your writing strengths?

I have no idea, so I’ll go with what I’ve been told. Characterization, emotional atmosphere and general ambiance. Also smut, I’m your neighbourhood smut peddler for a reason lol.

17 - What are your writing weaknesses?

Spelling and grammar in general, I have dyslexia and mild aphasia due to a TBI that I suffered in my early twenties. Even though I go over my fics dozens of times before they get posted and typically they go to a beta, not always, I’ll admit I am impatient lol. There are still some fuck ups in my fics, even after posting.

18 - Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

Unless I speak it at least somewhat fluently, I don’t do it. If I wanna suggest that the person is speaking in a different language than what’s being written, I just slap it in italics.

19 - First fandom you wrote for?

Pretty sure it was Buffy the Vampire Slayer or Ginger Snaps, I can’t remember tbh.

20 - Favourite fic you’ve written?

One of my faves is actually not even on AO3, it was back in my LiveJournal days. It’s a Torchwood fic, it’s basically a Torchwood version of Alice Through the Looking Glass just way more violent and gory. I might actually go over that old thing one day and eventually put it up on AO3, it was one of my first big fics and it’s still one of my favourite plots.

Tagging - I honestly forget who I follow that writes, who draws and who’s a gif maker lol. I don’t wanna tag the wrong type of creator, so if you see this and wanna take part, then consider yourself tagged! Make sure to tag me back so I can read your answers 🤗🤗

[flowercrowngods]

Hey I know you're probably thinking of deleting that post so I wanted to preface by saying you don't have to post this or respond!

I get that feeling too, no matter how many different fandoms go to into or how big it is, I feel like I'm on the outside of. It's a bit easier for me cause I haven't posted any of my stranger things fics on tumblr, if I ever will. But you're my favorite author on here, hands down. I put notifications when you post just in case I miss anything you write even though I'm on your tag list. It probably doesn't help to hear that you're an amazing writer, but if you ever wanna rant about stranger things or bounce ideas I'd love to hear it!! I keep myself grounded in stranger things by reading fics and seeing artwork, but that's never enough to actually get myself to finish my fics for it haha

Sorry if this doesn't make sense or doesn't help, I just came out of a coma of a nap and I wanted you to know that it's totally fair to feel detached from a fandom, I can't even make myself speak in a discord server, everyone already knows each other

And this isn't like a pity ask either, if you wanted I would actually love to have someone to bounce my ideas off of and hear theirs!

i know i said i would delete it, but so many people have reacted to the post that i’ll just leave it there as my pathetic little version of i hear you, i see you, you’re not alone (which is inconsistent because being alone was quite literally the point in this but yknow i like to be proven wrong) 🤍

i knew for a fact that i wasn’t alone with this feeling of free floating on the vastness of content and community while being part of neither. but i didn’t expect that it was such a common feeling (ignoring the selection bias, which i won’t go into now). and that’s kinda crazy. kinda sad. the whole development of fandom culture and fandom spaces at large. but apparently that’s just how it is.

you’re my favourite author on here, hands down

god i’m gonna— 🥺 that’s crazy. i’m. kinda speechless. boggles my mind. i love how much you love that fic, at this point it’s yours.

thank you for this 🥺 i feel ungrateful mourning the lack of community when i have people like you in my ask box and in my notes, thank you 🤍 (and to everyone who reacted to the other post. again; i see too, i hear you. you’re not alone. 🌷🤍)

[marrfixated]

FREE PALESTINE

Pinned post/My info:

Last updated Dec 28, 2024

TL;DR: Marr, he/she/ze/they, neurodivergent, total drama, sideblog @priyemma

Hello! My name is Marr. I use He/She/Ze/They pronouns. I’m cool with any gendered terms, and I pretty much use them interchangeably myself. Gal, guy, neither, whatever!

I have ADHD and anxiety along with other things, but those are the ones I’ll probably talk about on here the most. I’m mixed White and Latina (plus Native) but mostly white (in that it’s a little more of my genetics than the others and I’m painfully whitewashed). I speak English and want to learn Spanish, but I’m definitely not fluent. American, and a lot more “country” than I realize lol (I’m a midwestern gal)… I do study a few other languages, but mostly in a linguistic sense.

I’m still very much into Total Drama! It’s one of my longest lasting hyperfixations so far, the fandom is just a little dead lol. I also reblog a few other things, like TADC, Dungeon Meshi, Lost 2004, House MD, or Gravity Falls (I… haven’t watched that one lol)

I love shipping! I can’t even list all my faves because there’s so many. Despite being AAspec… it’s my favorite fandom thing lol. I am very much a multi shipper and I constantly am finding new things to ship! I try to not engage in ship hate ever, but sometimes I slip up lol. Everything that could be considered ship hate is tagged as such and never tagged with the ship that is being slandered.

I can’t really draw, so if I ever post my beginner drawings please be nice lol 😭 I’m still developing a style and learning. I have many, many WIPs that I might share here and there. I do really want to be able to draw confidently and make art for the things I love!

Sooo… I’ve actually written a few fics! It’s way harder than you’d think haha! I have a LOT that I work on in my free time… and I’ll post them someday. My user is Marrfixated on AO3, feel free to leave comments or kudos!

I’ve written four Alenoah oneshots so far. Most recently posted Contra Entendre, so go read that! I have 3 other oneshots that are somewhat written and I’ll post someday… Buuut I don’t like how they’re written right now! I currently have an Alenoah AU and a Priyemma post-canon fic in mind… but that’s not anywhere near ready haha! I write a lot more than I post… I have like 5 oneshots that are “finished” that I’m just not happy with lol!

I also have tiktok @Marrfixated. I post on tumblr more than TikTok because it’s easier, but I started off there. I mainly repost (“reblog”) things on TikTok. I have a discord that I’ll use on occasion by the same name. I also have a Priyemma centric sideblog on here (@priyemma), where I’ll usually reblog content from and vice versa.

You’re on thin ice if you engage in ship discourse, constantly hate on ship I like (it makes me sad 💔), or are a dsmp fan/an enjoyer of any of Vivziepop’s works (I don’t like you).

Proshippers DNI. Zionists DNI. TERFs DNI. Vivziepop defenders DNI. Dream supporters DNI. Dsmp supporters also DNI. Do some damn research. Also general DNI… I can’t list everything that makes someone a terrible person!

Do what you want, but it’s not unfair for me to ask for you to do it far away from me.

I might post suggestive things here sometimes, but sparsely and usually in a playful manner. Anything like that would be tagged accordingly, but let me know if there’s something for me to add. I do reblog suggestive content sometimes… I intend to cut down on that though! I don’t plan to ever share nsfw or suggestive content related to td, it makes me uncomfortable as most of the characters are minors.

I do curse a lot, and reclaim queer slurs on occasion. Please don’t engage in ship discourse on my account for no reason! That’s no fun. I do enjoy arguing with people online, but I save that energy for when I’m on TikTok.

I usually take like 3 years to answer asks or dms or whatnot for various reasons… but I swear I don’t mean any offense! I get nervous, or I don’t know how to answer, or it goes missing, or I forget… whatever. But basically… I’m not a passive aggressive person, and I mean no ill will if I don’t answer anything! I have um… a LOT of unanswered asks. My bad. Also I have like 50 at this point.

I reblog a lot, so I tag all my non-reblogs as #original post. I usually don’t tag reblogs on here.

That’s it!

[monsterbananatv]

20 Questions (for fanfic writers)

Look you might not have tagged me for this but it looks like fun so I’m just doing it too…

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

16

2. what’s your total ao3 word count?

49,701 (there’s some collabs which are adding to the word count but I’m too lazy to do the math)

3. what fandoms do you write for?

Lockwood & co.

4. top five fics by kudos:

I think about you every moment, everyday of my life

Kissing, and other truths

Amo, Amas, Amat

Every corner of this house is haunted

You’ll watch the stars while I’m watching you

5. do you respond to comments?

I try to but I’m very behind on my replies 😅

6. what is the fic your wrote with the angstiest ending?

I don’t really do angsty endings but probably “Gimme your hand (and I’ll give you mine)”

7. what’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

All of them lol but maybe “Would you still want me if I’m nothing new?” that one ends very happily but honestly all my fics end happily so they’re all contenders here

8. do you get hate on fics?

Nope! Everyone is so sweet 🥹

9. do you write smut?

No, it’s not really my thing

10. craziest crossover:

I don’t really do crossovers

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

Also not that I know of

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yes! “A Handy Excuse” by the same lovely people mentioned above ❤️ writing it was so much fun and I loved getting to work not only with people I consider my friends but also some of my favourite authors too, they’re the best

I also have another co-written fic with Yammy and Kate that came from a round of frantic fanfic lol

14. all time favorite ship?

Locklyle

I have others but I have never held on to a ship so tightly as I have with them

15. what’s a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Blah there’s so many but probably my Locklyle not a date date fic

16. what are your writing strengths?

I’m really good at dialogue and I think I have great comedic timing. Also I think I’m good at making things really cute and fluffy while also packing a little bit of those feels into them

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

Descriptions 😅 sometimes they’re really good, most times I use the same words a million times or completely leave it out. I also write rather slowly which isn’t a weakness per day but it’s annoying lol

18. thoughts on dialogue in another language?

I’ve never done it cause I only speak English but I think I can be done well

19. first fandom you wrote in?

Lockwood and co lol

20. favorite fic you’ve written?

Ok this is a tough one because I actually really enjoy and love all my fics but I’d probably have to go with “Would you still want me if I’m nothing new?” it’s my longest fic and I put so much love and energy and thought into it and I’m so so proud of how it came out

I totally didn’t forget about this until I was going through my drafts lol but here it is

Anyone else wanna play?

20 Questions (for fanfic writers)

thanks for the tag @shizuoi 🖤

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

21

2. what's your total ao3 word count?

93,846

3. what fandoms do you write for?

lockwood & co.

4. top five fics by kudos:

can’t leave the night

flooded

sick of this lonely air/designed for me

A Handy Excuse

sugar in my tea

5. do you respond to comments?

yep!

6. what is the fic your wrote with the angstiest ending?

where the winds sigh, but Road to Hell is literally a greek tragedy so...

7. what's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

sugar in my tea lives up to its name

8. do you get hate on fics?

not in my ao3 comments anyway

9. do you write smut?

i’ve been known to dabble.

10. craziest crossover:

i don’t do crossovers, but my road to hell casting is controversial.

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

possibly...

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

someone asked to translate can’t leave the night and sick of this lonely air/designed for me, but i’m not sure if there was ever any follow-through.

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

A Handy Excuse with @cats-and-metersticks @monsterbananatv @menina89 @hailqiqi and sciroccoorion was super fun to write! got my sapphire walk fic out of the way with a lot of support from friends.

14. all time favorite ship?

oof this is hard, but i have to go with mr. darcy and elizabeth bennet. i’m a basic girl at heart.

15. what's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

if we’re being honest, the Wildcard series, but the two stories stand on their own so at least i can live with that.

16. what are your writing strengths?

i’m good at writing efficiently, saying a lot in a little, and packing a gut punch in under 1,000 words. i’ve been told that i can change writing styles fairly easily, but i think i just write what the situation calls for.

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

i’m a little too good at writing efficiently, and by that i mean i really really struggle to write long, and this is across all genres. part of it’s that i’m just not a fast writer, and so it’s a patience thing. i’m getting better at recognizing where a story needs more meat on the bones, but actually putting it on is another matter.

18. thoughts on dialogue in another language?

it can be done very well, just not by me.

19. first fandom you wrote in?

harry potter. from voldemort’s perspective, and you will never find it.

20. favorite fic you've written?

it depends on the day you ask me, but Knave of Clubs (Wildcard) is very solid even when I’ve gone back to it.

who else wants to play?

[aliceinnaughtyland]

ANYTHING - PART. 3

Pairing: Last Boss x Reader

Warnings: harassment, smut, masturbation, fingering, caught during sex, unprotected sex (wrap it please)

Word count: 1.4 K

Summary: You and the militant meet again.

Author’s note: And I disappeared again. It’s like I cannot finish something I begin (TDAH hello). But here is the third and last part of this fic. Sorry for the people who waited for it, I hope it’s worthy of your time. I already finished two smutty fics, one with Karube and one with Niragi, and they both are coming really soon. Take care x

Nota bene: We do NOT condone Last Boss' actions as we do NOT condone violence and rape! We only love the Shuntarô Yanagi's interpretation of Last Boss! This is fantasies only! You do NOT deserve this! If you are a victim of violence, please get help as soon as possible! You are not alone. Stay safe xx

Tags: @scuzmunkie

It was a new day. You had enough days on your visa to rest a little. Everything was ok.

You decided to put your best swimsuit on and to go to the pool. You wanted to feel the sun on your body and the water on your skin.

As you walked straight to your goal, you caught a certain militant’s eyes. Well, two of them actually.

Niragi saw the bruises covering your body. They were discreet, but Niragi knew. He saw you two leaving the party the night before. And that was it, the beginning of a day in Hell for Last Boss.

As you tried to enjoy your day and relax, you spotted the guy from the night before, the one from the club, walking straight to you.

“Can I help you?”

Niragi was teasing Last Boss for the last ten minutes when they both saw the man violently grabbing your arm. The bald guy rushed to you and his friend followed him. As soon as he saw them approaching angrily, your harasser quickly released you and left. Did he know something was up or was he just a coward who couldn’t find himself near the armed men? We’ll never know.

“I had a patrol this morning, that’s why I left” Last Boss spoke after a few seconds of silence. His eyes were scanning your body with an emotion you couldn’t really understand. Worry? Empathy? Hunger?

“It’s ok you don’t have to justify yourself”

“I want to”

You nodded silently as the man in front of you continued.

“I have some stuff to do but I’ll see you later”

“Why?”

“I need to talk to you. Meet me at my room when you’re done with the party tonight”

He turned away, told you his room number over his shoulder and left.

You couldn’t really enjoy the party, your brain focusing on your future rendezvous with Last Boss. You glanced at the VIP room, searching through the militants. The man you were looking for wasn’t there. You quickly left the party, rummaging through the hallways. You weren’t nervous. Actually at this point you weren’t really thinking anymore, your body taking you to the place you wanted to be.

As you arrived at the door, you knocked lightly and waited. The door opened quickly. He was waiting for you. He shifted for you to enter and closed the door behind you.

Ok Y/N, you are alone in a murderer’s room. A murderer you slept with the night before. But still a murderer.

“Thank you for coming” His voice interrupted your train of thoughts.

“Well you asked me, so here I am”

And then the silence. You weren’t feeling threatened. You were abnormally calm.

You took the time to scan the surrounding room. You saw a lot of papers and books everywhere. Was it his room? The man who spoke so little but wrote so much?

Nevermind, he invited you for a reason. He wanted to talk to you, probably about last night. And then it hit you. You realized the guy had slept with you as a favour. I mean, you knew it. But what if he wasn’t okay with it? What if he did it only because he was feeling grateful?

“Look about last night” you began, drawing his attention back to you “I shouldn’t have asked you to do that. I just –”

“I liked it. That’s why you’re here” he interrupted.

“Oh”

“Yeah”

“So... What are all of these papers about?”

And that was it. The beginning of your night. You spent hours talking about everything and anything, forgetting for a moment the world you both lived in.

“I didn’t know you were such a talker”

“I only am when I’m interested”

You two continued talking the night away until you fell asleep on his bed.

You woke up before the sun. And Takatora wasn’t here. As you were about to turn around, trying to sleep away the deception, the bathroom door opened.

“Hello”

“Hi”

He came back to bed, shifting beside you.

“Did you sleep ok?”

“Did you sleep at all?”

Takatora only chuckled in response, his eyes dipping into yours. At that moment, there was no need for anything to be said. Takatora leant into you and kissed you deeply, moving to feel your body against his. You could feel it all. His hand on your face, the other pulling on your hip, his warm chest touching yours, his hard cock against your thigh. And just like that, you needed more, you needed it all.

Your hands travelled his body, from his neck, to his shoulder, to his arm, to his navel, until you could feel him in your hands. You stroked his cock slowly, caressing his tip before continuing your motions. He moved his mouth away from your neck to look at you, a pink flush on his cheeks. The man who was once terrifying became accessible and soft and you wanted him to ravish you here and now.

You continued stimulating him until it was enough for him to push you on your back, settling himself on top of you, taking your wrists in one of his hand. As he kissed your neck again, his fingers found their way inside of your swimsuit bottom, playing with your clit. Takatora grunt at the feeling of your pussy against his hand, soaked for him. A strangled moan escaped your lips when two of his fingers found their way inside of you, stimulating all the delightful spots, opening you for him. He aligned himself, and looked into your eyes to search for any sign of doubt. He found none.

You gasped as he entered you. At that moment, nothing but both of you existed. He thrusts into you, slowly but in a way that made you see stars. It was intimate, almost romantic. And then it snapped. His thrusts became fast and hard. His body was doing the thinking. The room was filled with the pornographic sounds of your moans and grunts. Takatora was grabbing every part of you he could reach, your waist, your hips, your thighs. You could feel his hot breathing in your ear.

You locked your legs around him, allowing him to thrust deeper inside you and used them as leverage to turn you both around, settling on top of him.

Takatora sat up, taking you with him. At that moment, he needed more and with one hand he tore your t-shirt apart.

As you were riding Takatora, you could hear the door behind you opening.

“Morning sunshine” Niragi’s voice resonated.

“Niragi!”

“Oh shit shit sorry”

It wasn’t Niragi character to be scared. Usually he would have stay there and teased the life out of him. But Lass Boss could be intimidating and even if he didn’t want to say it, Niragi was totally afraid of him. He quickly closed the door and almost run at the other side of the hostel.

You laughed softly as Last Boss grunted, his face buried on your neck.

He couldn’t believe it. He really couldn’t have one moment of peace with this motherfucker. He couldn’t even have one single fuck in fucking peace.

“I don’t know which one of you two will kill me first” he complained.

But soon enough, he could feel your hips moving again and just like that, Niragi exited his mind.

“Y/N fuck”

Your name was all he could say, the feeling of your cunt around him taking away his ability to think. He knew he was close. He knew he had to do something to take you with him. He touched your clit as you fasten your pace, rubbing fast circles into it.

You were soon submerged by the strong pleasure you were feeling and as you couldn’t take it anymore, your thrusts became sloppier. Takatora grabbed your thighs and began fucking you from under, his cock hitting all of your sensitive spots.

A stroke on your clit was all it took to made you come around him, milking his own orgasm away.

As the bald guy entered the meeting, Niragi immediately put his arms up defensively.

“Ok you need to know I’m sorry”

“You’re dead”

“Hey what is up with you two? » Aguni interjected.

“You know how Boss here can be a late sleeper so I went to check for the safety of this meeting right?”

“Right?” Aguni waited.

“Turned out he wasn’t sleeping, neither did the naked girl on top of him”

 “I’m gonna kill you” Last Boss spat as the rest of the room began laughing.

“Come on you need to invite her over, we want to meet here” another militant replicated.

“Who I’m fucking or not is not your business”

“Well from what I saw she was the one fucking you”

[no-droids]

Ask Me Again Tomorrow

gif credit @pedros-pascal​

Part Sixteen of the Rough Day Series

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 16.3K

Warnings: SMUTTTTT, following/stalking, some fluffy moments but mostly just a lil action and interaction, I don’t think there’s any other warning besides language and the smut (comm sex WITH A TWIST YALLLLL) but if you happen to find something else that warrants a tag, please let me know and I will do so accordingly!

A/N: The response to this story has grown beyond anything I could’ve ever imagined and I genuinely thank you all from the bottom of my heart for the privilege of writing for you.  Hope this one ends up being okay and I’ll get to work on the next chapter soon!

***

Headstart—12:17pm:

The sky is so pretty.  There isn’t much to look at on the surface—rolling hills and plains, grassy but with dry bare spots breaking up the green stretches, but the sky.  It’s an oil painting above you, pastel swishes of yellows and pinks and purples with an enormous ringed planet taking up half the horizon and another sizable moon hanging high.

You should probably be running.  Like, for real sprinting, but you can’t push yourself to go faster than a brisk walk.  It’s so… free out here, more hills springing up every time you get to the top of the next, warm air filling your lungs.  Even though you know realistically that the beginning will likely be the hardest—where you need to focus most on running and putting distance between you instead of hiding—truth be told, you’re not foreseeing making it more than a full day.  You’re going to try, obviously, but in the grand scheme, you wouldn’t be surprised in the least if he finds you tomorrow.  So, instead of wasting all your energy going as fast as you physically can right out of the gate, you just decide to stroll and think for a little bit.

You know what your goal is.  Obviously, to last as long as you can, but more specifically… well, if Din is going to chase after you, then he’s going to try to think like you.  Anticipate your movements, if he can’t already see the tracks you leave plain as day.  Very soon, he’ll be walking this same exact pathing, following the footprints you’re leaving behind, but if you’re ever able to shake him or throw him off course, he doesn’t have a tracking fob.  He doesn’t have any mechanical device that points him in your direction—if you can lose him with the footprints, then he’ll have to rely solely on predicting you. Which means you need to think… exactly the opposite of yourself if you want to outsmart him.

That’s harder than it sounds though, because… is he going to predict you predicting him?  At what point does it stop?  You somehow have trouble seeing this as an advantage the way he said it would be—you almost wish you had someone else chasing you, someone you didn’t know and someone who didn’t know you if only so this paradox could end before it begins.

You’re walking for about ten minutes before spotting a dirt road in the distance.  There’s a person following it in the direction of the sun—you don’t know this planet’s magnetic field but you do know it’s after noon and the sun would set on Arvala-7 in the west, so that’s what you’ll call it for now.  You call out to them as soon as you’re in range, and the stranger turns to you.

“Excuse me!”  It’s a woman, you see it as you get closer.  “I’m so sorry to bother you, but can you tell me where this road leads?”

She removes a sheer yellow shawl covering her dark hair and gives you a friendly smile.  “Hello,” the lady greets, before spinning around and pointing back the way she came.  “Osiruu is a few hours that way.  There’s not much there, but it will take you to G’ila, a transport hub with many opportunities for drifters, or Nariss, the capital.  I’m on my way to Shabeth,” she points in the other direction.  “It’s far—a day’s walk, but it’s a holy place and offers quite the view.  I would be glad for the company, but I understand its lack of practical appeal.”

So this place is safe enough to be inviting strangers along on your travels, noted.  You’re going to have to make the decision right now, then.  Which path should you take?

Something deep inside you tells you that you want to see this holy place, and just from a few sentences, you already like this woman and feel safe with her.  But then all of a sudden, you remember something.

Last known locations tell you a lot about a quarry, Din’s voice drifts back to you, sounding soft and distant from the dark forests of Naboo.  Smart ones go to populated planets, planets like Coruscant, planets that make it nearly impossible to find people.  Brave ones go to dangerous planets, suicidal ones try their luck in the Unknown Regions, idiots continue to go about their business on their homeworld without caring.  But planets like this—like Naboo… those are the pacifists.  The ones that don’t ever put up a fight.

You suppose you should decide what kind of quarry you want to be.  Friendly company and a view is something you normally crave—it’s something your soul speaks to after going without it for so long during your previous life.  You never pictured yourself as the fighting type.  When Din first asked you, you told him you wouldn’t run from him if he was chasing you, and choosing to accompany this kind stranger to her destination is essentially just that.  Sacrificing a chase for a pretty view.

“Does Shabeth have a sizable population?”  You ask her, and she shakes her head.

“It’s the sight of an annual pilgrimage that happens in a few months, but it’s beautiful there and I like to go whenever I can,” she tells you with a soft smile.  “But there’s nothing for miles outside it, I’m afraid.”

Your footprints will lead directly there.  He’ll find you easily.

“It sounds very nice, but I need to find somewhere with a lot of people,” you give her an apologetic smile.  Truly, you think she would’ve made for a nice friend.  “Thank you for your help, though, and good luck with your journey!  I hope we meet again.”

“Do you need any food or supplies?”  She asks you, and you stop short of passing her by.  “I don’t have much with me, but know what it’s like to be a newcomer to Sanctuary II.  I’d be glad to help.”

Good Maker, is this how everybody is here or did you just hit the jackpot with this lady?  She seems like… you, almost.  Her voice is gentle, she looks like she’d give nice hugs.  You’re about to politely turn her down, but then you realize the brilliant opportunity that’s presented itself in her image.

“Actually, this might sound like a really strange question, but…” you tell her, before looking down at her feet.  “Wanna trade shoes with me?”

***

Headstart—6:12pm:

You don’t think it’ll work, but as you walk into a small settlement a few hours later in a unfamiliar and worn pair of sandals, you decide that you’ll need to do this as often as possible.  You can’t come up with anything else that’ll throw him off your physical trail besides constantly switching shoes—is that bad?  Are you just an idiot with no hope?  You’ve had—you check your watch—like, five hours to think of a game plan, and all you’ve come up with is shoes?  You’re screwed.

At least there’s food here.  Plenty.  There’s vendors stationed along the street, multiple people passing by and going about their business.  Osiruu, that nice woman said—not much here, but you think she was wrong.  There’s children giggling and jumping rope on the corner, a shopkeeper sweeping her storefront, a graying man with an empty cup plucking an unfamiliar melody on an unfamiliar instrument—and while your tummy growls and you know you should quickly buy supplies and be on your way, you still stop for just a few minutes to listen.

It’s a lovely tune.  You drop a few credits in his cup after he finishes and find yourself humming it as you look at the plethora of goods being offered by the vendors.  Water, food—you buy enough of everything to sustain you for at least a couple days, not wanting to go hungry but also feeling realistic over optimistic.  The cuisine is foreign and you just point to things that look appetizing since you’re not sure about the name or pronunciation, but after paying and taking a bite into a rather large piece of purple fruit, your eyes nearly cross at how sweet and tasty it is.  Holy Maker, that might just be the best thing you’ve ever tasted.  You ask for two more after you finish the first, tucking one in your backpack next to your blaster and munching on the other as you keep browsing.

Suddenly you see shoes—yes.  Fucking shoes, your salvation.  You take a good look at all your options, of which, there aren’t many.  Generic men's, women's, and children's, all in the same color and design.  It’s good in a way—you see most people walking around in the same type of clothing here and you pray there’s not a way for him to track your gait or the whole thing is a bust, but truthfully, what you’re most worried about is the fact that you’ll create a brand new set of footprints wherever your old ones disappear.  Unless you trade with someone else, you won’t ever have a back pathing, you know that Din will probably be able to easily spot it.

“Three pairs of these, please,” you point to the correct shoes and tell him your size, but then—“Oh wait, actually, can I actually have one of them that’s the next size up?  And another that’s the same but in men's?”

The man behind the counter gives you an odd look but acquiesces, measuring the size of your preferred pair to multiple men’s shoes to find one that looks roughly the same—you doubt he’s ever had a request like this, but you’re also a generous tipper.  His smile is grateful when you tell him to keep the change and then you’re stuffing the new shoes into your backpack and moving onward.

Would there be some kind of map here, you wonder?  One that shows distance so you won’t waste time trying to reach a place you won’t be able to walk to?  That lady said a transport hub and the capital are through this settlement, but she didn’t provide much information beyond that.  You don’t want to be in the middle of nowhere when he finally catches up to you, you’ll need some place to hide.

When you stop to ask an elderly gentleman as he passes by, he freely provides you a basic gist.  There’s a large forest beyond Osiruu—after it will be a road that passes through a few notable places, with a town called Sijua to the west that leads north to G’ila, and Devain to the east that leads northeast to Nariss.  Both are within walking distance, though it may take a couple days to reach your destination.

Alright then.  Through the forest, you suppose.  You probably should’ve asked which way is east, but he’s already leaving and you don’t have the nerve to ask him to stop again.  You have a finger point, that’s all you need.  Making sure to use one of the small restrooms near the square before heading out, you eventually decide to make your way towards the direction he said this forest would be.

***

Headstart—6:58pm:

A bus.

You’re not going to take it, of course, but it’s the perfect solution to the problem you’ve been mulling over.  It’s at the very edge of the small settlement, and you quickly speed up into a half-jog as soon as you hear its engine running.

“Last call for the seven o’clock!”  A large man stationed near the doors yells as you approach.  “Last bus to G’ila until tomorrow!”

The sun is setting and you have to extend your hand out in front of you to not be blinded by it.  “Hello,” you give him a smile, before grabbing one of the handles on the side and stepping up onto the metal platform.

“Ah!”  The man quickly stops you, moving to stand in front of the open doors.  He’s as wide as he is tall, big enough that he blocks the entire exit.  “That’ll be ten credits, miss.”

“Oh,” you say, patting your empty pockets and pulling your eyebrows inwards, trying not to move too much in case the sizable amount of credits you have stashed in your backpack happen to rattle.  “Oh, no.  I think I lost my wallet.”

He sighs.  “Off the bus then please, miss.  Come back tomorrow if you find it.”

You nod, leaning your forearm against the paneling and beginning to take your shoes off.  “Will it be parked in the same place exactly?”

The driver looks curiously at you, clearly confused at both the strange question and your strange actions.  “I’m sorry?  Please—off the bus.”

“One second,” you tell him, now barefoot on the platform and digging into your backpack for the slightly larger sized shoes you bought earlier.  The sound of credits clink against your blaster, but you hope he takes your lead in purposefully ignoring them.  “Does the bus to G’ila park in this spot every single day?”

“Yes,” the man tells you impatiently, eyeing the way you’re stepping into the new pair with a subtle look of distaste.  Everyone is polite here, it seems.  “It will arrive back at seven am sharp with passengers from G’ila, in the same exact place.  Please get off the bus.”

“Thank you, sir,” you tell him with a smile, watching him step to the side to allow you to drop down into the dirt again and continue on your way.

Brilliant, if you do say so your fucking self.  Eliminate the need for a back pathing.  All footprints facing this direction are going to be the first footprints, and all of them facing the opposite way are going to be the last; if Din manages to figure out you didn’t take the bus, then he won’t be able to tell which new set are yours and which belong to the other passengers.  You pray the helmet can’t track gaits, but while you’re still paying enough attention, you make sure to keep your steps just slightly longer and even try placing more weight on the edges of your feet to make it look like you have a slightly higher arch than you actually do.  You’d put a pebble inside of them or something, but you know you’re going to be walking through the night and you don’t want to commit to having your feet hurt more than you already know they’re going to.

Eventually the quaint shops and small houses disappear behind you, and the sun setting over the horizon turns the clouds above turn more dusty green and brown than yellow and pink.  You hope Din opened up the ramp after you left.  You want him to see the sky.

***

Headstart—9:34pm

The forest here is different from Naboo, too.

Maybe it was because you only saw it while you were in crisis-mode, but that forest seemed much scarier and darker than this one.  The vegetation there was thick and overgrowing, but these trees look like they’ve never had leaves on them at all.  No twigs or small branches that sprout from the trunks—the branches are all thick and gnarly, criss-crossing with each other with how close they’ve grown together.  You bet their roots are practically one at this point, stretching for miles and miles but all sharing the same system.

Because there aren’t any leaves, there's nothing to block the moonlight shining clear and crystalline through the twisting maze of branches.  Sanctuary II appears to have a sister moon—Sanctuary I, perhaps?—that’s likely a similar size, because it’s the same one you've seen all day and it’s barely moved a few degrees that you can tell.  It must orbit incredibly close and be tidal-locked with this one then.  Two massive satellites swinging around each other as they circle a ringed gas giant, but it makes a stunning view and reflects more than enough light to see.

The sky is deep blue and maroon and you’ve been walking in a straight line for hours, using the stationary moon overhead as your guide.  The only issue with this plan that you’ve been able to come up with is that there’s no widely traveled path through the trees—even you can see your footprints and the clear trail you’re leaving behind.  You’ve been trying for a while to figure out another clever evasion tactic, but it’s harder than it sounds.  Can’t just change shoes again, that’ll be a dead giveaway.  How do you lose him?

You stop for a second, reaching into your bag to grab some water and stay hydrated.  Looking up once more at the beauty of the swirling colors peeking through the branches above you, you find yourself pausing after returning the bottle to your pack.  There are… an atrocious number of branches up there, and all of them are long and tangled and thick.  Sturdy.

You’ve… never climbed a tree before.

Without thinking much beyond that, you decide to bend your knees and jump, grabbing hold of one of the strong wooden tubes over your head and then swinging your legs up.  Ouch—the bark scrapes against your palms and you have to hold on tight with your thighs while you shimmy yourself upwards, but at least the wood is solid as fuck.  It takes you a minute or two, but you’re eventually able to shuffle yourself around so you’re straddling the thick branch, and then you look out to see the large collection of them criss-crossing in every direction around you.

Oof, this is dangerous.  You know it even before you start.  The gaps leading to the ground are bigger and more numerous than your potential pathing forward, but the only thing that gives you reassurance is how thick the wood is—you’re almost certain the branches aren’t going to break as long as you’re careful.

Okay.  Shoes, these are too big for the kind of dexterity you’re going to need.  You take them off slowly, being extra careful not to drop them, and then exchange them with the better-fitting pair you bought earlier, making a mental note that the sandals and the larger shoes are the two you’ve already worn.  If your pursuer manages to catch on to the multiple footprint changes, your most recent ones should ideally just… disappear right there, shouldn’t they?

You grin, before struggling into a low crouch and looking around your wooden cage for a safe way forwards.

***

Headstart—11:37pm:

Water.

A blessing, and not because you’re thirsty.  You have clean water in your bag and decades of habits formed in the desert to ensure you’re taking breaks and drinking enough—what you need is a way to disguise your footprints once you get back on the ground again.  This was good; scuttling your way along thick and twisting branches for as long as you have was time-consuming and exhausting, but it allowed you to avoid touching the ground for at least a mile or so, which means he’ll have to comb that entire radius to look for your drop.

And it was fun.

You even found yourself giggling as you ducked and scooted, ignoring the bark scraping your skin and your panting breaths, the way your face got sweaty and hot.  You had to do some brave maneuvers at tricky spots—jumping, balancing, hugging—but it almost just felt like an exciting little obstacle course for you and you’re honestly having a fucking blast right now.

Water, though.  Water is an unexpected beauty, even more than you’ve always considered it to be.  Water is an eroder.  Not only powerful enough to smooth down the rough edges of strong elements over time, but it will hide your footprints as soon as you create them and leave no indication that you were ever there.

Eventually you see it—a babbling stream cutting a considerably wide line through the trees.  You creep forward and hang tight to a branch above you to make sure you won’t fall, wiping the sweat on your brow with your other hand as you study the terrain.  The water is… a considerable distance below you, maybe about ten or so feet, and there’s quite a few branches on either side that extend and hang out over it.  You could probably find your way to the other side somehow, but something tells you to avoid the road beyond the forest if you can.  It leads to multiple places, it would be better to follow the stream until you can eventually merge with it later.

That means you’re… fuck.  You’re going to have to jump, aren’t you?

It’s the only way—you can’t leave footprints which means you’re going to need to land in the water.  The trees clear too far from the shoreline, so you can’t shimmy down the trunk of one for a shorter fall.  You’re going to have to climb out on one of those long branches until you’re suspended over the stream, and then you’re going to have to lower yourself as far as you can and then let go.  With your height already accounting for at least half the distance plus the length of your arms as you hang, you should only have to drop two or three feet before reaching water, and then maybe another two feet to the floor under it.  It looks forgiving enough—the moonlight shines and the stream is clear and you can mainly just see sand at the bottom, no sharp rocks or other potential dangers to be found.  This… this is doable.

Okay.  If you pull this off, you’re a badass.  If you don’t break any bones or seriously injure yourself in any way, you deserve some kind of commendation.  This is probably kiddie shit to Din, who keeps literal rockets strapped to his back and jumps out of ships flying thousands of feet above the ground, but this is a challenge for you and you’re feeling just excited enough to be up to it.

You’re eventually able to climb onto the thickest, sturdiest branch you can see that happens to hang over the water, straddling it and beginning to scoot.  Your thighs are killing you at this point but you’re holding deathly tight to the wood, your movements becoming more and more cautious the further away from the trunk you get.

You’re directly above the water now, but you need to go out a little further.  Aim for right in the middle so you don’t accidentally leave any tracks or prints on the shoreline if you need to catch yourself.  The unfamiliar wood in this forest is admittedly sturdy, but the branch begins to subtly sag with your weight as you keep slowly scooting forward, and you’re just about to the correct spot when—

Day 1–12:00am:

“Sweet girl.”

—You nearly fucking fall.

“Maker,” you gasp, suddenly scrambling to catch yourself on the branch before you can plummet.  It creaks and groans under your weight but supports you nonetheless, and when you’re one hundred percent certain it isn’t going to break, you jerk your head down to the communicator and see that it’s midnight, on the dot.

Shit.

Your heart slams against your ribs and your arms shake with adrenaline while you study it for just a moment longer, trying to calm the fuck down.

“Hey,” Din’s voice comes sharply from your wrist, crackling and tinny through the comm, nearly scaring you again.  “Answer me.”

You don’t want to sacrifice your grip right now, but you have no doubt he’ll fly the Crest out to you if you don’t respond.  So you quickly let go to press a button on the front face and then latch onto the branch tight once more, raising your voice because you can’t risk bringing your wrist up to your mouth to speak.  You hope he’ll be able to hear without the microphone picking up the sound of the stream below.  “Uh.  Ahem.  Hello.  Yes?”

“You’re too quiet,” Din’s disembodied voice immediately informs you.  “Or something on your side is too loud.  There’s an earpiece built into the side of the communicator, take it out and use it instead.”

You study the wrist brace without moving, until you finally see what he’s talking about.  It’s a small, wireless piece of machinery hidden on the left side of the electronic display, and you quickly pop it out and stuff it into your ear just in time to hear the sound of hydraulics clanging through the speaker as you clutch the branch again.  You’d know that sound anywhere, it’s the ramp of the hull closing.

“Are you already on the move?”  You ask him incredulously, your thighs starting to go numb with how deathly tight you’ve been squeezing this tree.

“Can’t sleep,” Din murmurs, sounding so much closer and deeper than before.  Does he have his earpiece on under the helmet or something?  Stars, is that why his voice sounds that good?  It’s like it’s coming from inside your own head, bassy and rough.  “Ready or not.”

You huff, your tummy going warm.  Of course he can’t sleep, of course he’s going to look for you as soon as he’s allowed to.  If he waited until morning, you’d probably be slightly offended.  You try to slow your heart rate into something acceptable, but being this far above water and hearing his baritone murmur directly in your ear make it difficult.  “But I’m… sleepy.”

“You’re always sleepy,” he tells you, and though you can’t actually hear him walking, the sound of his footsteps shake through his voice just slightly as he speaks.

“Hang on,” you huff, ducking your head to drag it against your shoulder, keeping the sweat from your eyes without using your hands, “you’re gonna make me stay up all night just because you do?  This isn’t fair—”

“Fair wasn’t part of the rules.”

Well.  Fair.

Stars, you can’t stay here.  You don’t know how long he wants to check-in for, but you’re also not confident with this branch’s ability to hold you for an extended time when you’re this far out from the trunk.  You need to get in that stream one way or another, but now that he’s here, you have an extra problem.  Din is going to hear you no matter what.

“Um.  Can you give me a second?”  You ask him, glancing around to make sure there’s no better way of doing this.  Nope, you realize very quickly—this is the best idea you’ve got, and you don’t really know what that says about the quality of all your other ideas.

“What?”  Din grunts shortly, but you just clear your throat.

“I need to… mute myself.  Give me like… five minutes.”

“What are you talking abou—”

“You of all people cannot be upset about asking for five minutes of quiet,” you return testily, looking down at the distance to the stream once more.  That’s a long way.  You… you can’t swim obviously, but again, the water doesn’t look too deep.  Just a couple feet likely, shouldn’t go past your knees.

It’s fitting that he doesn’t say anything, which you eventually take as disgruntled acceptance, so you quickly press the proper button on your wrist to silence the mic and then take a few deep breaths.  You have a time limit now, you have to do this.

With incredible patience and precision, you eventually slide until you’re clutching the branch upside down like an only slightly quicker and less coordinated sloth, before slowly dropping your legs and hanging over the water.

It’s… admittedly a bit further down than you anticipated, or maybe that’s just you making things worse than they actually are, but you’re committed at this point and there’s no going back.

You close your eyes, count to three, and then you let go.

The sandy floor meets your feet with considerable force and you make a hell of a splash doing it, nearly falling but just barely managing to keep yourself balanced and upright at the last second.  The water is cool and comes up just over your knees, your backpack miraculously didn’t get wet and all your limbs remain shaky but unbroken.

Okay.  Okay, fucking success.  It feels… thrilling, accomplishing a dangerous feat, and you quickly let out a loud whoop before clearing your throat, trying to sound normal as you press a button on the communicator’s face once more.

“Mando?”  You ask, slightly out of breath.  “Sorry about that, I’m back.”

Okay, now which way do you go?  Downstream seems like the easier path after getting in so much unexpected exercise, so that’s the one you go with.  As soon as you lift your foot from the sand bed, you watch your footprint almost immediately disappear through the moonlit water, and you bite your lip at just how well everything turned out for you.

After a moment though, you realize he hasn’t answered you.  You look down at the communicator again to make sure you pressed the right thing.  “Hello?  Shiny?”

“Did you trade shoes with someone?”  Din’s voice suddenly comes through the earpiece, sounding absolutely incredulous.

“Shit,” you tell him, trying not to smile.  “Hoped that was gonna buy me more time.”

“It… might’ve, if you kept walking in the same direction as they were,” he informs you after a moment.  “Your shoes went south, but this other pair got all the way out here just to turn back around again?  Good idea, but the execution needs work.”

Maker, he’s smart.  It was the first attempt at a footprint change so you weren’t thinking much beyond tricking the tracking mechanism in his helmet, you ignored his logic completely.  Essentially, the exact opposite of what he told you to do.  You like to think you’re getting better at it by this point, thinking beyond just the original exchange, and you’re hoping you’ll be able to trick him with at least one of the other fifty times you changed shoes today.  You’ll have to see tomorrow night, if you can make it that long.

Also, the road you were on apparently goes north-south, that’s important information you make sure to take note of.  The man in Osiruu said Devain and Nariss are to the east, and that Sijua and G’ila are westward, right?  Remembering that you thought south was west earlier, you do some quick calculating and immediately come to a stop in the moving water as soon as you figure out your positioning, turning around and walking upstream instead.

You want to go to Nariss.  The capital, and the biggest city in walking distance.  Smart quarry go to populated places, places that make it nearly impossible to find people.

“Alright.  Mando: one, Me: zero,” you finally acknowledge, swinging your backpack around and unzipping it to dig inside for another piece of fruit.  You’ve been hungry for hours but had to use both hands to stay safe and far above the ground, it’s the perfect time to eat.  “How’s the baby?  Behaving himself?”

“He kept trying to follow you after you left,” comes Din’s response, and you stop with just your teeth piercing the flesh, wondering if you heard him right.  You actually open your jaw and pull the fruit away with just a bite mark in it.

“You’re joking.”  No fucking way, not that little demon.

“Wish I was,” he tells you solemnly.  “Made a fuss, tried to open the ramp a few times.  Didn’t cause any trouble after, just… pouted.”

That’s… that’s exactly how he responded the very first time Din left the kid on the ship with you instead of bringing him along.  He threw a fit, tried to ditch you for his dad multiple times, and then ultimately just looked cute and mopey with his limp ears until Din came back.  Do you think it’s just him rebelling against change?  That has to be it, right?

“He better not be giving you any hints about where I am,” you warn his father.  “I’d tell you to put him on but I don’t want the earpiece getting lost forever.”

You hear it.  The softest laugh—barely a breath, coming after years of learning to make it just quiet enough not to be registered by the helmet.  It gets picked up by the communicator in all its understated beauty when normally it’d be silent, and it’s just jarring enough to make you careless.

On your next step, you accidentally lift your foot too high and make a splash, and you already know you fucked up before he can say a single word.

“What’s that sound?”

You immediately stop moving, allowing the cool water to move as silently as possible past your stationary knees.  Shit.  “Uh.  What sound?”

You think he purposefully doesn’t say anything.  Probably because it feels a little like cheating, doesn’t it?  It’s to your disadvantage, having him be able to catch hints from your environment when he’s the one who made check-ins mandatory, but then again… how smart do you think he is?  Something tells you that he might not need to track you at all—what are the chances he stumbles upon this little stream and just naturally assumes you were clever enough to use it to hide your trail?  Did you waste time trying to engineer a vanishing act when it’s not going to matter regardless?

Oh well, too late now.  You quickly decide to change the subject.

“You should try the big purple fruit that one vendor sells when you get into Osiruu, by the way,” you tell him pleasantly, taking a big chomp out of it and then letting out an extended hum of delight that only really fucking good food or sex causes a person to make.  “I’m eating one right now, it’s so good.  Be the best thing you’ve ever tasted.”

“Mm.  Doubt it,”  immediately comes his low response.  Fucking immediately.

“Mando,” you gasp, scandalized and giddy enough that juice dribbles down your chin a bit.

“Are you having fun?”  Din asks, instead of pushing the conversation any further in that direction.  You don’t know if you’re thankful or disappointed with how quickly he decided to abort, but you take a moment to consider his question while swallowing and wiping your mouth.  Not the answer, you know the answer—but why he bothered to ask.  Did he know you were going to enjoy yourself as much as you have?  Your only possible lament is how you’re talking to him through a communicator instead of having him next to you.

“I am,” you say warmly.  “Be… be better if you were here, though.”

“Give me your coordinates,” Din proposes, and his voice is just low and rumbly enough to make you pause.

You’re really, really proud of yourself for only considering it for a few seconds before scoffing.  “Psh.  Nice try.”

“Was worth a shot,” he sighs through the earpiece, and you smile, taking another bite of fruit.

“Ask me again tomorrow,” you offer, grinning at the implication.

“We’ll see,” you hear him return, and though his tone doesn’t really change, you know he’s probably rolling his eyes.  He won’t have to ask for your coordinates because he’ll already be there, but it’s nice to pretend for a while longer.

And then you both walk all through the night, sharing casual banter with each other for hours.  He never once implies he wants to disconnect, even when you hit him with more nonsensical questions—

“What’s your favorite food?”  (“I don’t have one.”)

“Okay, well what about just a food that you like?”  (“I don’t like food that much.”)

“What do you mean?  Everyone loves food.”  (“Not me.”)

“Alright, well um.  What’s your favorite color, then?”  (“I don’t have one, either.”)

“Come on, you must have some kind of color you like.”  (“What’s your favorite color?”)

“���Brown.”  (“Then that’s my favorite, too.”)

—until the sun rises and you both say your goodbyes.

***

Day 1–6:15am:

You resolve to waiting until you see another person to allow your feet to touch dry land, figuring the longer you stay untraceable, the better off you’ll be.  Your toes are wrinkly and your pantlegs and shoes have been drenched for hours, but then you finally spot a few fishermen standing upstream with their backs to you, speaking to each other in the dawning light.  Two look to be full-grown, but there’s a smaller one in the middle, maybe a teenage boy, and you pause for a second, looking at the riverbank next to them.  All their valuables—water, food, bait, extra rods, but also… their shoes.

Quietly, you reach into your backpack and remove the pair of men’s shoes you bought earlier.  The ones closest to you on the shore seem to be the smallest, so you sneak over as silent as possible and rapidly make an exchange, fitting the new ones on your wet feet before allowing yourself to touch dry land and then speed walking away.

The ones you left him are newer and roughly the same size anyways—yikes, maybe slightly smaller now that you’re thinking about it—but at least you have a back pathing.  If that kid decides to take your offering and the shoes fit, Din will follow him, and if he decides to go barefoot instead, he should still follow him, right?  You’re not really aiming to trick him outright, mostly you just want him to waste more and more time.  This likely wouldn’t work if there wasn’t a time limit attached to this hunt, but you’re going to do everything you can to disappear while he’s still far enough behind you.

***

Day 1–7:06am:

You get to Devain remarkably quickly after finding the correct road.  The pit stop is much bigger than Osiruu, big enough to call an actual town instead of just a settlement, but still not large enough to feel concealed.  You want a city.  This place at least has cars and ships moving about and overhead respectively, but you’re looking for somewhere with lines.  Somewhere that feels as cramped and busy as possible.

Still, you find a restroom to use and then decide to grab some more food for your trip, happily spotting your new favorite purple fruit in one of the shop windows.  As you’re reaching out to hand the storekeeper the appropriate amount of credits, Din’s gruff voice comes through the earpiece so suddenly that you jump, nearly dropping them all on the counter.  “Hey.”

“Holy shit, what?”  You gasp, earning a confused look from the lady in front of you.  You quickly shake your head at her and mouth an apology while Din grumbles in vexation.

“You were supposed to stay on foot.”

Ah.  So he got to the bus, then.  Okay.

“Oh,” you answer ambiguously, exchanging the money for your bag of food and giving her a polite smile.  Din stays completely mute while you grab your snack, stuffing the rest of the goods in your backpack and then turning to leave—mute for so long that you have to double check you didn’t accidentally do it yourself.

“…Smart girl,” you finally hear him say.  Quietly muttered under his breath, half proud of you and half frustrated for making his job more difficult.  “Which one of these is yours then?”

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” you announce, before taking a large bite as you leave the establishment and talking with your mouth full.  “You really gotta try the purple fruit, it’s great.”

The communicator abruptly clicks to silence on his end without anything else and you laugh so unexpectedly that a few pieces of it fly out of your mouth.

***

Day 1–1:32pm:

Somewhere miles away from you, Din jerks to a halt in the middle of a forest.

He looks around the dirt floor, walks a few paces and hears the kid coo gently from his cradle.  Behind the visor, the red footprints he’s circling are the last ones around for hundreds of meters, as far as his display can read.

His helmet slowly tilts upwards, and follows the endless maze of thick branches overhead.

With the beskar hiding his face, no one can see the way he slowly breaks into a beautiful grin.

***

Day 1–9:51pm:

Oh.  Oh stars, you’re tired.

You’ve been walking all day without really seeing anything, not having any place to disguise your tracks in the wide open plains.  You could’ve stuck to the road, but you started to feel the exhaustion creep in during the early afternoon and you wanted to be far away from other travelers and potential danger if you needed to rest.  You knew this would be a long journey when you left Devain earlier—over a day’s walk, a group of children told you—you even tried skipping or jogging a bit to see if that would inspire more energy in you, but it didn’t help much.

The large cup of caf you bought while in town was drained hours ago and it didn’t help much either, probably because your exhaustion is more physical and not necessarily mental.  It just felt like a sweet warm drink to sip before you go to sleep, that’s how much the caf helped.  Still, you kept walking, kept moving forward even as you squinted in the setting sun, your feet aching from traveling for this long wearing unfamiliar shoes.  The last time you changed them was hours ago, pulling another bus maneuver but with an air shuttle instead.  Still, you don’t think it’ll be enough.  You don’t even know where Din is but you already feel like you’re losing ground just knowing that he’s the one in pursuit.

You feel it—the hair standing up on your neck, the tingles in your hands, the stirring of your tummy—whatever the incessant gogogo that your instincts happen to scream when you’re in first place but you know the person behind you is quickly closing in.  It’s day fucking one, it’s day one and you feel him in the wind as it brushes through your hair, you can’t even pause to rest because nobody knows better than you that he’s an absolute fucking machine when he wants to be.  The kid may have powers beyond that which can be explained by the laws of nature, but Din is a force all his own.  He drives you forward when everything inside you is telling you to stop.  He keeps you awake and determined when you just desperately need to rest.

But that only goes so far.  You’re bordering on two full days without sleep, and though you’d normally be able to suffer through, the constant movement is just brutal after being confined to a stationary ship for so long.

There’s a lone tree in the distance, you think.  It’s hard to see.  Not because it’s dark—well it is, just a bit darker tonight compared to last, but mostly because your eyelids have grown heavier and more burdensome than the bag around your shoulders.  That looks like a good place to just sit for a second, right?  Maybe eat some more food, try and wake yourself up?  Yeah, that’s a good idea, you’ll head towards the tree and just… sit…

***

Day 2–12:00am:

Completely dead to the galaxy and sitting on your ass with your back against rough bark, the comm clicks and Din’s voice comes through the earpiece.

“Wake up.”

It startles you enough to make you lurch forward and jerk your head around in a panic, looking for any flash of beskar so you can instantly break opposite to it.  You scramble on all fours to look around but you don’t see anything, not even behind the trunk when you crawl, and then you take a deep breath and use the bone of your wrists to rub your eyes vigorously after a moment, knowing your hands are filthy.  “Fuck, how’d you—”

“You’re always sleepy,” Din repeats, and you collapse back into the tree with an exhausted groan, not entertained but not even having the energy to get mad about it.

“I… I gotta sleep,” you tell him, already feeling your body let go of its tension and search for the darkness of unconsciousness once more.  “Shit.  How d’you… mm.  Stay awake all the time…”

“Sleep,” Din encourages, you can still hear him walking.  “You need rest.  I’ll see you soon.”

No—

“No,” you whine like a child, moaning and shoving yourself upright.  Maker, you’re trying to focus, but asking that of yourself is almost impossible right now.  Everything swims—you were dreaming, you think, but you can’t remember and it’s not important other than to emphasize how woozy you are.  Things still feel like a dream, somehow.

You think he can hear your struggling through the comm, because the sound of his footsteps pause.  “Go to sleep.”

“You go to sleep,” you tell him bluntly, giving your head a violent shake to try and wake you up.  You want to slap your own cheek but you don’t want him to hear it.  “I can’t sleep if you don’t.”

“I’ve have at least a couple more days in me before that happens,” Din murmurs, and you bet he knows exactly what the fuck he’s doing to you.  You start to slouch, hearing the voice he uses when he’s curled around your body in the darkness of the hull.  So warm, so gentle.  If you use your imagination, you can feel his fingers drawing slow circles on your back, the vibration of his low voice rumbling against your ear as you lay your head on his chest.  “If I hunt you the way I’d hunt a quarry, I’m going to find you before you wake up.”

“Then I’ll jus’ have to… not let tha’ happen,” you slur.  Even this close to unconsciousness, you try your best to throw in a misdirect.  “Already… paid for the bed an’ everything.”

“Sure you did.  You in another tree?”

You immediately frown even as your eyes drop closed, too tired to fight but still managing to sound upset.  “You makin’ fun of me?”  You ask him with a harumph.  Genuinely, you’re not smart enough to figure it out right now.

“Not hardly,” Din sighs, sounding… you don’t know.  Is that displeasure or not?  It’s not immediately clear.  Does it sound that way because you’re just dumb stupid right now?  Or because Din can’t actually decide how he feels about it?  “Lucky I heard water over the comm last night, I would’ve wasted hours in that forest.”

“Noooo,” you whine in response, trying to push yourself off the tree but tipping sideways in the process, “that’s not fair—”

“Fair wasn’t part of the rules,” he repeats himself again and… nope, you don’t even have the energy to snark something back.  You just grumble your best imitation of him while you do everything you can to heave yourself upright.  It’s pitiful, you lose your balance not even halfway through and just plop on the grass for a second and groan.

“Stop,” Din eventually orders through the earpiece, tired of it.  “What’s sixteen times itself?”

You’re loopy to the point where you don’t even question why he decided to ask you that.  You just furrow your brows for a second and try to think about it, before suddenly realizing you… don’t know, you can’t remember.  Multiplication tables and squares up to twenty are elementary to you, you know them by heart.  Sixteen times sixteen.  One forty-four.  No… no that doesn’t sound right, is that twelv—

You take way too long answering what would’ve been an immediate response two days ago.

“I’ll stop here for tonight,” Din tells you with a resolved sigh.  “I won’t move until you wake up.  Go to sleep.  You’re putting yourself in danger, you can’t even do the basics.”

Later, this moment will come back to you.  That problem isn’t basic, not many adults would be able to tell you very quickly that the answer is two fifty-six.  You don’t even think Din would.  You would, though.  On Naboo, you used rapidly applied trigonometry in your head to find his location, and that was barely two minutes after waking up.  You should know this.  And he knows you.

But for right now, you don’t pay it a single lick of attention.

“You promise?”  You ask quietly, voice incredibly small as your head tilts back towards the sky, already feeling yourself beginning to fall back into the darkness again.

“I promise,” he vows in return, gentle but a promise nonetheless.  He doesn’t have to do this.  You wouldn’t be able to keep going even if he didn’t offer up this temporary truce, but knowing he isn’t currently gaining ground on you makes the idea of sleep so much more welcoming, something you want to seek out instead of fight.

“Will you, um…” your expression furrows.  How do you say this?  You sigh, giving up before even trying to figure it out.  “I’m… not in a bed.  I’m outside.”

Din doesn’t say anything when you pause, and even through the haze wanting to take over, you know it’s going to sound needy.  You want him to stay.  Even in the midst of an adventure, you want him to stay, you want to hear him breathe as you rest, but there’s not really an integrous way to ask.

You don’t need to ask.

“I’ll keep the comm open and wake you when the sun rises,” comes his lulling baritone before you can elaborate anymore, enveloping you in comfort in this dreadfully uncomfortable bed of grass and dirt.  “Sleep, sweet girl.  I’m right here.”

***

Day 2–5:34am:

The sun shines over the hills and you lift your head up to squint your eyes at it, confused as fuck.  Looking down at your wrist to check the time in the warm rays, hands and clothes dirty from laying on the ground that long—you stay groggy and clueless for just a moment longer, before your heart lurches when you remember Din’s promise to you.

You open your mouth to address him but then catch yourself just in time.  Wait.  Don’t panic.  Listen.

Breathing.  Slow and relaxed through the earpiece, a rhythm now branded into your memory from months of nights spent in pitch black.  He’s… asleep.

Din is asleep?  Seriously?

You can count like… twice that this has happened, and one of those was because he got you to touch him just right after closing up a wound on his back, and his body couldn’t handle the strain and passed out.  You’re never awake when he’s asleep—you’re just not, it doesn’t happen.  Din… sleeps like it’s just a choice for him, he doesn’t ever really need it.  Almost like how he used to eat before he started sharing meals with you, he said he doesn’t even like food that much.  You think he just severed all of those things long ago, things that are basic fundamentals of survival and operated like a bounty droid that lost its voice box.  It’s… nice, feeling like you’re somehow giving back some of the things he lost.  Unintentionally encouraging him to find sleep again.  Making sure he eats more, listening to him speak.

You struggle to your feet as quietly as possible, hearing him continue to breathe slow and relaxed through the communicator.  This isn’t purposeful, you don’t think he actually allowed it.  He promised you, and Din doesn’t take shit back.  If he tells you he’ll do something and he doesn’t follow through, it’s either out of his control or a mistake, it’s never been purposeful.  He didn’t mean to fall asleep.

And, in other circumstances, you most definitely would not find some way to take advantage of this.  You’d let him sleep and do other things in the meantime—make some food for you and the kid, find something on the Crest that isn’t spotless and clean until it is, or just… lay there next to him until he woke up.  But… these circumstances are their own.  You have to capitalize now, this is your chance.  You passed out last night around… ten pm, you think it was, and then he promised to stop at midnight.  That means you have to walk at least two hours before he wakes up if you want to prevent any loss of ground—you don’t know where he stopped, he could be a few miles back even.

You have to find Nariss—you have to.  It’s your only option, if you keep trying to run, it’s just going to make it so much easier for him.  Now is the time to hide.  You know it hasn’t been long, it’s barely been two days since you first left the Crest but it feels like you’re already in endgame, already making moves in self-defense instead of actually planning your maneuvers ahead of time.

The capital should be half a day’s walk from here, then.  As long as you get there, you think you’ll be okay.

***

Day 2–8:28am:

Din’s groan suddenly comes through your ear.

You immediately stop, seeing a busy road in the distance and glad you haven’t quite made it there yet, before trying to disguise your voice as drowsy.  “Mm?”

“Shit,” he breathes, and you hear him get up, the sound of beskar moving as he grunts.

“Mpph,” you groan back, squinting your eyes to see if that’ll help sell the act.  “I thought you… Mando, fuck, y’said you’d wake me when the sun came up.”

“I… fell asleep,” he admits, voice rough with it, sounding just as confused as you felt earlier.

“You said you had days in you before that happened,” you murmur, taking a deep breath and stretching your arms up above your head.  Stars, your back hurts, how does he possibly manage to carry a fucking jet pack around all the time?

“Yeah, I…”  He pauses for a moment and you bite your lip, not liking the quiet as soon as you hear it.  “How long have you been up?”

Op.  Not good.  “Wha?”

He’s not falling for it.  “How long?”

How in Maker’s name?  This is impossible.  How can you hope to hide from him when you can’t even manage to hide the smallest fucking truth from him?  Can you salvage this somehow?  “…Like ten minutes.”

“Least a few hours, then,” he sighs, and you get ready to hit him with the same line he used when you complained about his leg-up, opening your mouth as soon as you hear him speak.  “That was smar—”

“Fair wasn’t part of—”

Oh.  Well.  Apparently you didn’t have a reason to feel shitty about deciding to haul ass while he was passed out even though you kind of ended up doing so anyways.  There was no agreement besides that he wouldn’t move until you woke up.  Reason is on your side, but it still feels a bit like you fucked him over.  Is that valid or are you just so used to being nice that putting yourself first feels like a wrong you’ve committed?

“Don’t feel bad,” Din tells you, and you hear a soft coo in the background.  It makes you smile the smallest bit, your shoulders relaxing even as they ache from carrying your pack around.  “You should feel bad about stealing that poor kid’s shoes, though.  He walked home barefoot.”

You smack your forehead.  “It was just….”

“Yeah,” he scoffs when you don’t finish your sentence, and you can’t keep back a giggle.  “Alright, I’m up now.  See you when you get here.”

And then the communicator clicks, and you’re…

Uh.  What the fuck was that?

No.  Nope, you’re not going to get played.  That was a brilliant attempt at fucking with you, but you’re not falling for it this time.  You’ve grown since that night on Canto Bight, you know him, he can’t just say shit to fuck with your head and then smile at your flailing response from under the helmet anymore.  You normally would stew in that last comment until it got to you, made you make a mistake most likely, but the more you think about it, the more certain you are that he has nothing.  He was just trying to see if you’ll abandon your entire plan just by implying he already knows it.  That’s beginner shit, you’re not falling for it.  Din wanted to leave the conversation with the upper-hand since you gained at least an hour of extra ground while he slept.  You’re certain of it.

***

Day 2–12:35pm:

Nariss is big.  Nowhere near the size of Coruscanti sectors of course, where billions of people are packed from surface to exosphere and require oxygen recirculation towers to breathe at the very top, but just slightly bigger than you expected.  It’s bustling and you haven’t even made it through the city gates yet—you’re approaching them and the large number of people waiting in line, seeing buildings stretch out for miles in front of you and grinning.  Yes, this will work nicely.

As you peek over shoulders in the sizable crowd, you see only two or three people allowing people to enter one at a time… is that a biometric scanner?

Oh.  That looks good and it also doesn’t look good at the same time.  If Din’s safety meant nothing to you, you’d have no trouble whatsoever getting in line and waiting to do a retinal scan, but you immediately pause and consider the potential consequences.

Your dumb ass almost weighs the option of clicking the communicator on and asking his opinion.  You’d give away your location in a heartbeat (if he doesn’t know it already) just because you’re worried he’d… what, exactly?  Stand in line for an hour, take his helmet off in front of a crowd of people, have the system ping his scan, and then hang out and wait for New Republic reinforcements to show?  You have to stop worrying about him.  He’s not a baby, he can handle himself and you need to stop considering the possibility of taking a loss just so he doesn’t have to, even if the self-destructive sentiment feels ingrained in your nature to do so.

So you wait in line, moving at a slow pace but at least moving.  While you’re standing there quietly, a man in front of you decides to strike up a conversation.  You don’t come from a place with an excess of people, but the ones in your sector were friendly and did this kind of thing often, so perhaps for that reason, you decide to chat.

“Do you have some place to stay?”  He asks at one point.  So far the conversation has revolved around him—every time he asks about you, you deflect.  He doesn’t need to know.  “Nariss isn’t kind to drifters.”

This catches your attention, though.  This is relevant.  “What does that mean?”

“It’s expensive?”  He scratches his blonde hair, giving you a soft smile.  “Food, housing, all of it is way out of my price-range.  I stay with my uncle and work overnights at the eastern docks.  It’s not much, but it’s enough to keep a roof over our heads.  We used to live in Gibrath, but then we moved to the city because he’s a good architect and they’re always expanding.  It’s nice, of course, but really expensive.”

He’s handsome, you think… in kind of a boyish, charming way.  Blonde hair, sparkly blue eyes.  He doesn’t look much older than you, and maybe in another lifetime you would’ve found him appealing, but… you like darker features, you think.  Someone a little less expressive.  This guy… talks a lot.

“I thought this moon was a safe world for people displaced by the Empire,” you offer, taking a step forward as the entire crowd shifts.

“Sanctuary II is,” he comments.  “The capital is safe, too—what, with all the orangies walking around,” he tilts his head to two jumpsuited guards trying to organize the glob of people so the line can move faster, rolling his eyes as if they’re some kind of joke.  “But not… welcoming, not if you’re looking for a place to settle.  You would’ve been better off in G’ila.”

“Is there anywhere you know that would take me for free?”  You ask.  You have quite a few credits left, but you don’t think it’s a good idea to stay in an inn.  It’ll be the first place Din checks.

“Are you a virgin?”  He returns, and you immediately pull back at the unexpected question, your heart thudding at the possibility of danger.  The man’s sandy eyebrows shoot up at your response and he quickly apologizes—“Heavens, I’m so sorry to ask like that!  It’s just… the only place I know is the Holy Keja Orphanage on the northern outskirts.  Their signs say they only house children and teenagers, but I’ve heard from other girls your age that they’ll accept any woman as long as they’ve stayed pure in the eyes of the Maker.”

“Oh,” you say after a moment, leaning sideways to see just a few people standing in front of him.  Good, this is almost over.  “Um.  Yep.  That’s me.”

He smiles at you once more, giving you a nod.  “When you get to the city, just go straight through.  It’s about a mile outside of the gates, no more than a day’s walk from this side of town.”

Okay, that’s… interesting.  You think about it while you thank him and begin to exchange polite goodbyes, moving up another step until he’s next in line.  That might actually be a good move.  Din could spend a long time in the city without ever finding you.  Smart quarry go to populated places, but… smarter quarry defy the expectations placed upon them, right?  He knows you’re smart, and even though you’re confident his “See you when you get here” was purely psychological fuckery, that also implies… at the very least, that he’s assuming there is a here to get to.  Meaning, he knows you’re not going into the wilderness to evade him.  He’s not going to comb the outskirts when there are so many places to hide within the city gates, with an entire perimeter of New Republic guards stationed around it.  Even if he does, the signs will say only children and teenagers—categories you do not fall into.

The unnamed man is soon ushered forward but you stop him quickly.  “Oh, by the way.  I doubt this will happen, but if a man in a big metal suit with a tiny green baby happen to ask you the same thing, please don’t tell him what you just told me.”

He furrows his eyebrows at you and cocks his head, but smiles and agrees nonetheless.

***

Day 2–5:43pm:

You have an idea.

You’ve been working on it all afternoon, but you were hit with it the second you were looking for another pair of shoes to buy and find a clever way of putting on.

The cheapest ones were ridiculously overpriced, blonde dude was right.  You blinked down at the tag and asked the salesman where the cheapest shoes in this part of town were, and then he just wrinkled his nose at you and shooed you out of the store.  Granted, you slept in dirt and spent two days walking—you bet you reek, but he didn’t have to be like that.

Though, the man’s displeasure with you had an upside.  You were holding a possible pair of pants and a shirt to buy when he threw you out, not yet having checked the atrocious pricetag on them, but it appeared as if he’d rather let you have them for free than rip them from your… admittedly, pretty filthy arms.  Oh well, you weren’t complaining.  Fancy clothes for free, score.

But now you’re here, and you have the best idea.  You don’t need to change shoes, not yet.  Why?  Because you’ve figured out how to turn your incessant detriment into an advantage.

You’re in the middle of downtown, you think, maybe just some random crowded square, and there’s an inn in front of you.  It’s fucking enormous, and you already know it’s gotta be incredibly expensive just looking at the sheer number of stories.  It’s an eyesore, it sticks out.  But that’s okay, because you’re only planning on staying for a night.

It’s also… right next to New Republic headquarters.  Or fuck, at least a station of some sort, because they’re swarming in and out of the constant crowd, passing by the valet doors.

At first you naturally wanted to steer away from the jumpsuits, since you know they’re bad news for Din, but then you remember what he said before you left.  I’m only telling you so that you’ll know your advantage and find a way to exploit it.  I can’t be seen by any officers, or they might arrest me.

It’s to your advantage, he said so himself.  Everything lines up perfectly—the street is bustling, the inn is well protected, it’s nice—it’s everything you’re looking for.

And there’s another upside, see.  An omnipresent, omniscient ghost in the form of a communicator clipped to your wrist right now.  If Din is always going to be able to predict you, he’s always going to know when you’re lying, always be able to read you… then you’ll just have to let him.

Let him know.  Let him know exactly where you are.  Right in the middle of the most populated street you’ve seen thus far, a constant barrage of people walking by and New Republic officers patrolling.  If you were planning on staying in the city, this would probably be your best option to hide.  He could waste days here if you’re smart about it.

The concierge doesn’t appear too pleased with your lack of cleanliness and neither do you, honestly, but at least he allows you to book a suite for the night.  It’s… not as bad as you were originally assuming, credits-wise, but it’s worth more than half your stash and you’re going to have to conserve from this point on.  It shouldn’t be too bad—your destination is a holy orphanage, you’re sure they’ll have some extra food and a bed for you even if it won’t be ideal.  Still, you think you’re going to enjoy some lavish experiences for once in your life before you go.

***

Day 2–11:54pm:

Alright, so this was the best idea ever.  This is the shit.

You’re leaning back against a fluffy stack of pillows, squeaky clean from an absolutely glorious bath and watching the flickering drama on the large holonet display in front of you.  You don’t have any idea what’s going on, as it’s being broadcast in Rodian, but you haven’t been able to change the frequency because it’s so fucking intense—somebody’s sister is their mother, you think?  No, that must be a mistranslation, right?

You’re also in a robe.  Yes, there is a motherfucking robe in here.  And… and slippers, it’s like a dream.  Do people normally wear slippers in bed?  You do.  Hell, maybe you should stay here, screw the credits and the chase.  This mattress is even better than the one on Naboo and you’re basking in the luxury after being outdoors for so long.

The lights are off other than that and you’ve opened the drapes wide, knowing you’re on something like the fifteenth floor and nobody would be able to see you anyways.  You just like being able to turn your head and look out at the sky.  Violent and periwinkle tonight.  You wonder if he’s looking, too.

Luckily, you snap yourself back out of it and glance down at the time on your communicator, quickly pressing a button on the remote to mute the Rodian show and then opening the line the moment the hour changes.

Day 3–12:00am:

“Hiya, Shiny,” you say before anything else, laying back and running a few fingers through your damp hair.  Your eyes close against the flickering light, taking a slow, relaxed breath.  Maker, this feels nice.

“You sound happy,” Din comments.  Astute, you feel happy.  Well… you’d obviously feel happier if he was here.  Your eyes flick over to the open bathroom door, still steamy from your bubble bath earlier, imagining him walking through it completely naked and then climbing over you on the covers.  You can only really picture it from the neck down—no, hang on… you can see his shaggy brown curls, that one spot on his forehead you know, how his facial hair would be dark and frame his mouth.  No face, though.  Missing just one fraction of him from your imagination, feeling incomplete but also somehow… complete in a way.

“I feel better after sleeping last night,” you tell him, purposefully leaving out the softness of the sheets underneath you, the sheer comfort of all this extravagance.  You don’t need it, you’ll never need it, but it feels nice to have for once.

“I do, too,” he replies quietly, and your eyes flutter closed.  You… miss him.  This mattress would feel softer with him next to you.  He’d probably be able to translate this show for you, even though you already know he’d fucking hate it.  You can imagine it—you with your eyes closed, him propped up on an elbow next to you and grumbling vague descriptions of the nonsense happening on screen just to hear your chuckles.  Adventures are great, but maybe they aren’t as great by yourself, you think.

“You should sleep tonight, too,” you encourage, but he scoffs.

“Not a chance,” Din mutters.  “Oh, before I forget, we need to charge the communicators today.”

“How am I supposed to do that?”  You ask him, glancing at all the multiple wireless charging outlets stationed around you.  “I’m in the middle of nowhere.”

He doesn’t even take a fucking second before responding.  “Good one.”

You grin up at the ceiling, warmth flooding you.  You love him.  Literally every single time, he just knows.  Your curiosity is too overwhelming after this happening so often.  Your plan to distract him relies on him being able to read you, but that doesn’t prevent you from wondering how he does it so accurately, time and time again.  “How do you know?”

“You slept outside last night,” he immediately tells you, like that should mean anything to you.

Does he… does he truly know you well enough to know how much your back and shoulders hurt today?  How much you were aching for a shower and clean clothes?  A bed to sleep on that isn’t dirt or metal?  You give into the accurate prediction with shameless honesty, not caring if he knows it’s the truth.

“This bed is soft,” you murmur gently, dragging your hand across the mattress next to you.  “You should be here.  I’d make you feel good.”

Admittedly, your comfort is making you a bit drowsy and you said it in the easiest way possible, but you didn’t necessarily mean it sexually.  Well… you sort of did—you’d make him feel so good in this bed—but what you meant was more… comforting.  He could take a bath, or a shower, and get all the grime off him.  He could feel clean and unburdened, take a break instead of constantly moving around.  The baby could have a whole bed to himself if he wanted, though you know he’d probably want to be on this one instead.  You could all look at the sky together.

Din is quiet for a little bit, before his voice comes back through the earpiece.  “Are you in an inn?”

“No,” you say, a little too quickly.  Perfect, that sounded just right for a lie.  You are lying, you absolutely are in an inn, the only difference is that you want him to catch on that it’s a lie, so… why does he take way too long before responding?

“Hm.”

What the fuck—why… how is it even physically possible?  He read you that deeply from one single word?  You’re not sure if he’s somehow psychic and figured the whole fucking thing out or if he just knows there’s something off, but it’s still enough to blow you away.

“Are you doing this on purpose?”  You blurt without thinking.

“Doing what?”  He grunts, sounding like he’s stepping over something, his breath changing intensity as he walks.

“If I look out this window right now, am I gonna see you standing out there just messing with me?”  You don’t even know what to believe anymore.  How do you beat this?  If you don’t want him to know the truth, he’ll figure it out, and if you do want him to know the truth, he’ll still figure it out.  His perception is unbelievable.

After a moment of silence, he murmurs gently through the comm.  “I thought you said you were in the middle of nowhere.”  It sounds like he’s smiling.

“I…”  your eyes shift around awkwardly, “am…”

Din lets out a deep sigh.  He’s right, that was bad, even for you.  “I found your bed a few hours ago,” he admits.  You close your eyes as you listen to him make his way closer to you, step by step.  “I’m nowhere near the city yet.  You have time to sleep.”

Your expression furrows and you frown.  “Why are you helping me?”

“Why do you want me to think you’re in an inn?”  He tosses back, and you huff.

“Because I’m trying to outsmart you but you make it really fucking difficult,” you grumble, not happy about him catching on so quick.

“You’ve also gained about four hours on me since we started.”  His voice is gruff.  You don’t know if he thinks it’s a good thing or a bad thing.  “You should give yourself more credit.  I thought I would’ve found you by now, never expected you to get all the way to Nariss.  It’s… not good for me.”

The honesty creeping in makes you go soft.  It makes you want to reciprocate, even if it’s dumb and you haven’t thought it all the way through.  “Wanna know a secret?”

“Tell me.”  His voice is a bed all its own, deep and gentle and safe.

You say it before you lose the nerve.  “I might just turn around and walk back.”

His footsteps stop and you hear a small sound in the background, a quiet little baby noise that suddenly makes your heart ache.  You’re comfortable but incredibly aware of how alone you are.  People pass by on the streets below, cars and hoverbikes honk in the distance and you’re by yourself.  For the first time in over a year, like you have been for years, you’re by yourself.

“Sweet girl,” Din sighs, and all of a sudden… you can feel his arms around you with it.  You feel so… known, somehow.  Every sentiment you could’ve possibly given in your last sentence, he relays his understanding back with his.  He makes you feel loved with it.  “Never wants to run.”

You don’t say anything, because you suddenly realize you’re totally fucking whipped, up down and sideways for his metal ass and the little floating grimlin that follows him around, and you would throw away the fifth quarry, adventure, the sky—literally everything if you could be with the both of them right now.

But again.  You don’t have to say anything, he already knows.  “Give me your coordinates.”

Your eyes pop open and you bite your lip.  Oh, stars.  You hate that you do genuinely consider it.  He could be here, and very soon.  With the jet pack, both of them could be here in less than an hour, probably.  He could take a shower.  Watch these stupid shows with you all night without needing to be on the move, help you build a bed of pillows for the kid on top of this one.  You could be with both of them again, even if it’s only for a little while.

“Ask me again tomorrow,” you finally whisper, looking down at the soft white fabric of your robe, the way one of your slippers is falling off your foot as the holonet program continues to play on mute.

Din’s footsteps eventually start up again, and you both relax in silence together.  You, squinting at the screen because your eyes are getting heavy; him, continuing to travel step by step and gain ground on you.  Let him come.  You’ll be long gone by the time he even makes it to the gates.

It’s been about ten minutes of shared, quiet existence before you hear him bite into something and chew, and your face suddenly lights up.

“Are you eating the purple fruit?”  You ask, your slipper falling off with excitement.  You don’t know why, but it’s like… you’re stoked for him.  Just as proud of him for doing normal things as he does when you step out of your own comfort zone.  You like to think you’re both better that way.  Balanced.

“Mm,” Din replies with his mouth full, and you grin down at your bare legs peeking through the robe while he swallows.

“Is it not the best thing you’ve ever tasted?”  Your voice goes a little breathless with it, and you hear his footsteps stop once more.

“Close,” Din murmurs lowly, sending a small shudder through you.  It suddenly feels a bit warm in here, doesn’t it?  This morning was one of the rare times you were awake while he was asleep… it’s almost always the other way around, and just from the implication in his tone, you’re reminded of the thing he likes doing most when you’re resting.  Maybe he’ll let you do it to him, next time around.  The thought gets you hot enough to warrant the other slipper falling to the floor.

“You’re alone, right?”  You whisper, knowing he must’ve pulled the helmet up to take a bite of the fruit.  He must still be following your path through the hillside, then, not yet reaching the road.

“The kid is awake,” Din tells you, sounding like he’s trying to stop everything before anything starts.  His words are short and clear in their meaning, but…

This has a very small chance of success, you already know.  “…Do you want to—”

“No,” he responds quickly, already way ahead of you.  “We can’t.”

Something in his voice… you don’t know, there’s just something there that makes you feel just a little reckless.  Should you push it?  You’re by yourself in this suite, what can go wrong?

“You can’t,” you correct him quietly, shifting around on the bed just a bit and biting your lip.  It’s a thrill—being able to tease him without having him in front of you, drive him crazy knowing you’re just out of his reach.  “But I can do whatever I want, can’t I?”

There’s a pause, a tense and knowing silence suspended between you before he eventually speaks.

“I’d be real careful,” Din mutters low in warning, but what is he gonna do?

“What are you gonna do?”  You whisper to him devilishly.  Quiet and breathy, beginning to snake your hand down.  Stars, your heart is already pounding.  You’d only likely mouth off like this in person just to see how hard he’d fuck you, but this feels extra dangerous for some reason.  He’s stuck, he can’t do anything about it right now, and you know it’s playing with fire.  “You could hang up if you don’t want to hear me.  Or you could find me before I’m finished.  Come make me stop.”

Din doesn’t say anything but he very much does not hang up, nor does he come busting into your room like you imagine he’d like to.  The sheer fact that your door is still closed and locked tells you for sure that he isn’t just hanging out in the hallway, just letting you have your fun.

You start pressing your fingers against your robe at the apex of your thighs, humming at how nice the pressure feels.  You don’t even spread your legs or push the fabric away, you just sigh into it and wiggle your hips a bit, pressing hard against your clit and listening to him breathe.

“Do you want to listen?”  You ask quietly after a moment, and Din still doesn’t respond.  Likely because there’s not a real answer, both yes and no would imply the wrong thing.  “I’ll talk.”

Still, nothing from him.  Dead silence through the comm.  You’re starting to understand.  For two days, you’ve felt like he could read your every thought just by the cadence of your voice.  He’s staying quiet so you can’t even attempt to do the same to him—if he doesn’t talk, you can’t find a weakness and pounce on it, you can’t feel any more confident or reassured about your own ability to read him.

You’ll just have to push a little harder, then.

“Hm.  If only this fancy communicator could…” you pause to look down at your wrist for a second, studying the menu.  You don’t think you’ve ever really looked at it, you never had the time.

Din’s growl is sudden and sharp through the earpiece.  “No, don’t even think—”

“Ah,” you smile, tapping the face and immediately finding the correct screen.  “Take pictures.”

He’s deadly quiet for a moment, and you bite your lip with excitement.  When he does speak, his voice is a pure threat, chilling you to the bone as much as it burns deep in your tummy.  “…You wouldn’t.”

Ignoring him, you suddenly locate a menu option that sounds phenomenal right now.  “Oh shit, does this holocall?  Or is it a video option?”

“Holo,” he says very seriously while you study the lack of complexity of the built-in camera in skepticism, “and the kid is awake, so you can’t—”

“Oh, it’s definitely a video,” you unclip it from your wrist and he curses as you sit up, and then you press a button and wait impatiently for him.  “Pick up.”

Din takes forever before responding, and you hear the continuous beeps as it attempts to connect, before his quiet baritone rumbles in your ear.  “What if I don’t?”

You feel your mouth pull down at the corners, not so much frowning as you are dubious.  He’s going to turn down the opportunity to see you and your surroundings when his whole goal is locating you?  Really?

“You sure?”  You ask softly, raising an eyebrow.  “You’d get to see me, where I am.  What I’m…” your eyes dip down to the loose robe riding your curves, your skin glowing against the white fabric, “…wearing.”

The beeps continue on for a few more seconds, until they finally stop.  You frown down at the black screen of the communicator, not seeing anything at all.  Did he decline the transmission request?  No… there’s a little red light next to the small lens that wasn’t there before.  Why can’t you see him?

“Why can’t I see you?”  You ask.  You want to look at him looking at you, you don’t want to always be stuck on the other side of a one-way mirror.

“I… have it linked to my helmet, but it only has a front-facing camera,” Din tells you after a moment, and he sounds… slightly out of breath.  “Easier to see, the watch is useless now besides the controls.”

Wait, does that mean you’re… being shown on the inner-display of his helmet instead of his wrist?  Right in front of his eyes, as if he were actually here with you?

“Nobody can see me but you?”  You clarify, and when he doesn’t respond, you bite your lip and lean back into the pillows.  You lift the watch up slightly, extending your arm out until you can get the angle as wide as possible.  “Can you see… this?”  You ask softly, before hooking your fingers in the collar of your white robe and slowly pulling it open for him.

“Where are you?”  Din asks instead, and you hear his footsteps through the earpiece, as if he’s walking away from something very quickly.

You don’t answer him, parting the soft fabric until your breasts are completely exposed and you sigh, closing your eyes and snuggling back into the pillows once more.  “I’ll tell you where I am if you keep watching me.”

“Why?”  Din grits in frustration, coming back around to the same dangerous question he had earlier.  “Why would you do that?”

“I don’t know.”  You slowly tilt the camera down until you can spread your legs and the robe falls open with the movement, letting him see your pussy peeking through in the flickering light of the muted screen in front of your bed.  “Can you see that?”

“Yeah,” he says shakily on the end of a breath, and you feel yourself get wet.  Fuck, he sounds so fucking tempted, the sight making his voice come without any of the self-assuredness as it usually has, but… he could also just be saying that.  How do you know he’s telling you the truth?

“What am I doing?”  You test him, lifting your knee just the slightest bit so you really give him something to look at.

“Spreading your legs for a camera,” Din responds without hesitation, voice scraping against your ear, making you shiver and your nipples harden.  Fuck, the way he says it, like it’s wrong and bad even though he’s the only one who can see or hear you do it… it makes you feel even more naughty and emboldened.

You bite your lip and reach your hand down to spread your lips for him, too, hearing his breath immediately catch on the other end.  Already your pussy makes your fingers slick against your soft skin, the sash of your robe still holding the fabric together on your body but also loose enough to allow it to part in the right places and reveal everything you want him to see.

“I am in an inn,” you whisper teasingly, letting your finger drop to brush against your clit and then sighing in soft delight.  Oh stars, that feels nice, it feels so good to treat yourself after being completely nomadic for two days, getting to be clean and soft and comfortable while you feel this pleasure, and Din’s voice growls through your communicator like you’re doing something painful to him.

“Fuck,” his breathing picks up while you begin circling your clit.  “Where?”

“Nariss,” comes your quiet moan, turning your head on the pillow to blink slowly at the camera.  Wanting him to see your eyes as well as your finger slowly dip into where you’re the hottest, caressing the sensitive skin there knowing he’s watching.

“Where in Nariss?”  Din’s voice is as pleading as it is sharp, desperately trying to keep either you or himself on track.

“I don’t know,” you say again.  Truthfully, you don’t—you don’t know the cross streets, you don’t know the part of town, you don’t know much of anything at all besides physical descriptors.  You quickly move the camera to the side as far as you can hold it and let him see you from a different angle with the window as a backdrop.  “But the window is open.  And there are lots of people outside.”

“Can they see you?”  Din immediately challenges.  Of course they can’t, you’re fifteen stories up and the room is darker than it is outside with all the city lights and swirling colors of the sky, but you suppose he doesn’t know that.  You think he just needs to relax—if this is what he’s always like during hunts, you now know exactly why he comes back to you all riled up and tense.

“I don’t know,” you murmur back, starting to rub your clit a little faster, trying to make it feel like him.  It doesn’t—your fingers aren’t large or strong enough to give you those perfect circles; you just feel like you’re meandering yourself towards ecstasy instead of picking you up and hauling your ass there like he does, but it’s okay.  Hearing Din’s rough breathing come through the earpiece, knowing his hands are probably clenched tight into fists, wondering if he’s hard yet… all of it culminates into a power trip unlike any you’ve experienced recently.  It makes you bold, tells you to open your mouth.  “Does it matter?  I’d still let you fuck me against it if you were here.”

“Stop it,” comes his growl, but what is he gonna do?

Your leg lifts a little wider so you can slowly slide your fingers down and push two of them inside yourself, and Din swears as you moan, “Come find me.”

“Give me your coordinates—”

“Are you giving up?”  You offer breathlessly, lifting your eyebrows and your hips up slightly at the question, but you’re… not expecting the extended silence following.  You assumed a growled no would immediately come next, or just another empty threat said with enough force to make you tremble with excitement, but not… nothing.

The response makes you pause just for a second, easing your fingers out and dragging them across your thigh to clean some of the wetness off before extending your arm out towards the communicator.  Din stays quiet while you navigate through the menu with trembling fingers, eventually finding your coordinates and hovering over the unchecked share location box.

You wait with your lip bit, confident he knows what you’re doing and you don’t have to narrate or repeat yourself.  Fuck, you knew you were considering abandoning this entire adventure just to be next to him again, but you had no idea.  No fucking idea that it could ever be a thought in his own mind as well.  You… assumed he likes this, hunting is what he does for a living and he’s the one who conceived of the idea in the first place.  Is he just that aroused by you?  Or is there something more?

“No,” Din eventually murmurs, and you immediately navigate out of the menu so you don’t accidentally press anything catastrophic, before pulling your hand away from the communicator with a resolved hum and settling back into the pillows again.  Making sure to look directly into the lens even if your eyelids are heavy with heat and desire, you slowly lick your fingers and then reach down once more.

His deep, shaky breath is so telling.  Exhausted after all this, but still not hanging up, still doing his hardest to tough it out when he’s only miles away from you and has jets attached to his back.  You don’t want to drag it out but you also do, you want to be kind but something about Din makes you also want to be as formidable as possible.  You’ll never be able to threaten like he does, you’ll never have anyone cower just because you walked into the room, you’ll never be as powerful or strong as he is, but you can still put up a fucking fight against him in your own way.

You whimper softly, your breathing beginning to find a quicker pace as surely as your fingers do.  It begins to spark and build, a red hot flame being kindled by the knowledge that he’s as close as possible without actually being close, right here with you when he always seems so far away.

“Mando,” you whisper, though your expression pulls inwards just slightly because it… in a scenario as sensual and intimate as this, it almost doesn’t sound righ—

“Din,” he whispers back, so quiet you almost don’t hear it, like he almost doesn’t want to but has to anyways, and then you just start to fucking burn.

“D-Din,” you whisper instead, trying to keep your voice as quiet as possible through the rising swell.  He’ll be able to see it, you think.  The way your tummy and chest start to heave, how your body begins to brace for it—and yeah, Maker, he sees it, because his voice suddenly changes.

“Stop,” Din growls roughly, knowing exactly how you cum—knowing exactly what it looks like, the way it sounds in your breathing, what it tastes like, how it feels on the inside.  It’s been so long since you’ve touched bliss without him, months and months since you brought yourself to completion on the floor of the Crest by yourself, and though he’s rarely ever denied you, your own high on newfound control causes it to slip.  He barks your name and tells you to stop once more, but it’s too late.

“I’m gonna cum, Din,” you breathe out—

“Don’t—”

It tears through you, rapid and surging, and he snarls a curse, something loud snapping and thudding and… did he just punch something?  You can’t think, it’s delicious and hard as fuck and everything you needed after two days of near constant movement and thought with little rest, and you bite your lip to keep quiet but a pained whimper still shoves its way out of your tense vocal cords regardless.  It sounds like it hurts because it does hurt; the orgasm shatters your body into pieces and you’re left trembling by yourself on this soft bed, wishing he was with you on a metal one.

You sink into the mattress in the moments following, sluggish and exhausted and just conscious enough to keep the watch facing you.  You bet the camerawork was terrible, shaky at best, but you can’t find it in yourself to care right now.  You just lay there and listen to his harsh breathing while you work to slow your heart rate, reveling in the filthy little show you just gave him and wanting to finish it out properly.

“Come find me,” you breathe out once more, lazing soft and naked for him, blinking dazedly at the watch as you pan it over you.  Your thighs are still twitching and there’s a thin sheen of sweat clinging to you, but you drag a finger through your swollen lips and carefully wipe the wetness across one of your nipples.  “Clean me up.”

“Fuck,” Din suddenly spits through the earpiece, furious.  “You think—y-you think—”

“What?”  You hum, basking in the afterglow and so, so curious.  Truly, you’re dumb as fuck, you have no clue what you’re thinking, but if anybody would be able to tell you, it’s him.

There’s a moment where his breathing stops.  It’s completely silent on the line, before you hear another few heavy footsteps on his end pick up and then halt just as quickly.

“You think you can taunt me?”   He murmurs, dangerous and deadly quiet.  “Show me exactly where you are, disappear and then make me waste forever trying to get there?  You think that’s gonna work?”

Your eyebrow lifts, considering.  He… may or may not have predicted your strategy perfectly, but his insight has stopped surprising you by now.  “Maybe…”

“Maybe you shouldn’t fall asleep tonight.”

Ooh.  That one sends goosebumps down your arms, but you’ve gained four hours on top of a twelve hour headstart.  He can’t scare you with that tone, not when you’re still woozy with pleasure and he isn’t right in front of you.  Instead of wilting beneath the hard threat, you just blink gently at the communicator, finding strength in being the only one to get him this mad when he’s always so composed, this talkative when he barely says a word.  “Maybe I’ll just stay here then?”

“Maybe you wanted me to know you’re in an inn because you already found someplace to hide that isn’t one,” Din reasons very, very adeptly.  Stars, your heart subtly begins to pick up, your legs continuing to tremble as the small red light next to the lens stares you down.  “Can’t be planning to stay with someone you just met because you’d already be there, can’t be going to a hostel because you found the one city on this moon built for commerce and not aid.  Not staying in another inn, you can’t afford it—the view looks high up, that robe is expensive, and you already bought food and at least five pairs of shoes in two days.  I don’t think the place you found is even in Nariss.  You think you can outsmart me, sweet girl?”

The chill down your spine doesn’t reach your eyes, you won’t let it.  You just feel yourself smile, tilting your head at him and licking your lips while your finger brushes one of your nipples, but Din doesn’t accept your silence the way you’ve always accepted his.  He wants an answer from you, right now, and it’s clear in the dark rumble of his voice, the danger slowly brewing beyond what you originally planned for.

“Tell me,” he orders, unamused and leaving no room to disobey.  “How long do you think you can keep running?”

Your eyelashes flutter, suddenly deciding… why not?  What have you got to lose?  Nothing that you didn’t already go into this situation completely expecting to lose anyways.  What’s the worst he can do?  Find you?

You close your eyes, pinching one of your nipples and wondering if you might just go for another one since he’s still here.  “Ask me again tomorrow.”

But then, instead of immediately responding, you just hear Din’s footsteps suddenly pick up, faster than any pace you’ve been able to keep over the past few days.  You don’t think it sounds like a run necessarily, but you know that his legs and strides are far longer than yours and it’s probably pretty much equivalent to a run for you.  You hear the rhythm of your demise speeding up, coming closer and closer, and everything in you both fears it and welcomes it.

“We’ll see,” he tells you, and then the red light vanishes and your earpiece clicks to silence.

***

Day 3—2:23am:

Even though it takes you much longer to do so than it normally would on a bed so large and comfortable, after such an exciting interaction and not being used to flickering light when you try to sleep but wanting to experience the rarity anyways, you’re eventually able to pass out.

But, not even a few minutes into a restless dream, you turn over and accidentally knock your communicator off the wireless charging station on the side table.  It blinks with four percent battery life.

***

To be continued!!