#i wrote this cuz i’m pissed off

[wonderthor]

breeding kinks are great yeah but they’re even greater when yall already have kids

probably already have more than you thought you would and content with the kids you have now, but your husband is keen in giving you just one million more

so you’re being pressed gently into the mattress with his body, laying on your stomach while his hand is under your throat so he can be cheek to cheek with you and he rocks into you over and over

and your head’s in the clouds, but you can still hear everything he says

“you’ve been such a good mommy, always so good to our beautiful babies, sweetheart. i think we should have another one. how about it honey, you wanna be good and give me another baby? another beautiful baby that me and you and their beautiful siblings will love on? come on, be good and give us another”

when you shudder and moan against him, telling him your answer, he gets a bit more serious. making sure to pound and pound into you, getting you ready to accept the copious amount of seed he’s going to give you. because he’s putting that baby in you right now.

[wincore]

I faked my engagement for free cake samples and got sued after I ran away AIO | haechan

pairing: haechan x baker!reader

genre: comedy, fluff, rivals (?) to lovers (?)

warning(s): quite possibly you will be inflicted with cringe, shameless scamming, mild swearing, one (1) innuendo

words: 5.4k

song recs: santa doesn’t know you like i do by sabrina carpenter, too late for chocolate? by kana hanazawa, like a raspberry by 宇宙ネコ子, honey by kara

a/n: ty to my queens lana and cat for gassing up this dumpster fire i wrote in a caffeine haze while watching my bf die every 20 secs in ds3. the initial plot was going to be far longer and more fleshed out but i fear i'm past my prime ( ._. )" i still hope you guys have fun with this one!! i got to play around with hallmark comedy far more this time, so overall it was a fun time writing <3 happy new year, my lovely mooncakes!!

part of a nonsense christmas: reddit edition collab <3

r/AmITheAsshole

u/YeastMode6969 • 3h

I faked my engagement for free cake samples then got sued after I ran away. AIO?

I (24F, small bakery owner) faked my engagement to get free cake samples at my rival bakery but the employee said I needed my fiance to be there. I panicked and grabbed the first guy to come through the bakery door after me. Turns out he’s not just some random customer. To top it off, he was ridiculously attractive even though he pissed me off every two sentences. I had a panic attack, told myself it’s totally not my fault, and moved on by baking fourteen cakes over the weekend. I thought I got away with it, but three days later, I got an email from him—he’s now suing me for “emotional damages” and “theft of pastries.” Am I doomed, or is this just karma with extra frosting?

⥣ 7.7k ⥥ 2,701 Comments

bun_theory0222 • 2h

INFO: Did you at least try the samples? Were they worth the lawsuit? We’re all dying to know here.

➥ Reply ⥣ 3.2k ⥥

muffinbutdrama1122 • 1h

nah cuz why is he suing when he CLEARLY wants to flirt??? this man is embarrassing but so are you. somebody matched ur freak <3

➥ Reply ⥣ 1.7k ⥥

soggywaffle0205 • 6m

YTA why can’t this shit happen to me. AT LEAST I would commit to the bit.

➥ Reply ⥣ 420 ⥥

cerealfordinner0323 • 2h

Bro sued you just to slide into your life again. He’s not slick, and neither are you. Good luck with that wedding cake.

➥ Reply ⥣ 9,011 ⥥

. . .

If you could hop a few steps to the right, feign unconsciousness, and climb right into the active fireplace, it could potentially make everything okay. For you, that is. Not for the poor bakery employees who would have to call the cops. 

“I’m sure he’s a handsome one!” The girl behind the counter giggles, light pink dusting her cheeks. “You’re- you’re so gorgeous!”

Setting aside the fact that most gorgeous women you know end up with malformed gargoyles, your current predicament is almost equally sinister. What started as an innocuous process to gain free wedding samples (in other words, a scam) has led to a question that should be obvious but completely escaped your mind following your trailing success.

“We’ll need to have you come in with your fiance for the free wedding cake samplers. Is he around?”

Is he around?! Boy, you sure hope so. Because now you’re also frantically looking around with the employee after you blurted out another lie: “He’s going to be here soon!”

When did you turn into a compulsive liar? You’re not sure if your mom would be proud of you for being so good at nabbing free food, or disappointed that you’re a filthy liar. After all, she did tell the buffet employees you were under 10 all the way till you were 14. So, really, you’re not the source of the problem! You brush your festive red skirt of invisible crumbs, trying to busy yourself.

The cafe itself is well decorated for Christmas—a silver reindeer bores holes into your head from by the front door, a small Christmas tree stands at the center that’s a little emaciated but the cute Sanrio ornaments in Santa hats make up for it, and most importantly, a beautiful Mont Blanc cake sparkles from atop the glass counter. (Seriously, why didn’t you think of this? Your own bakery is all sparkles and no play.)

You move out of the way of other customers, and casually glance at the source of your awe and joy. Powdered sugar dusts the top as idyllic snow, covering the sugared cranberries and sugared chestnuts, not dent in them under the white fondant star. The base of the cake is tied with an edible red ribbon, completing the seasonal aesthetic of it. A sigh rests momentarily upon your lips before it escapes. 

You love Mont Blanc cakes, but you never quite get it right. That’s your biggest failure as an up-and-coming baker, and such is the reason for your unhinged serial sampling scam. You swear it started off as a search for inspiration in a creative rut but before you knew it, a lie had spilled from your eclair-sweetened lips, and another, and another. 

It is at this point that you briefly consider bolting for the door. Tibet is great around this time of the year. Maybe if you convert to a monk lifestyle and atone for your sins, you’ll be granted a pardon in the form of delicious sweets. Before you can make your escape, however, the front door jingles, and in strides a sight unbelievably reassuring. A man with caramel hair enters, who might as well be wrapped in a giant red ribbon and seated atop a snow-white horse in golden ornaments.

It’s a Christmas miracle. Hallelujah! They still apply to you.

His smile—soft and sweet as meringue hearts—lights up the room as he inhales the warm, sugary air of the bakery. You’re hit with the vaguest sense of familiarity. He might be one of the few customers you get these days. For a moment, you falter. Are you really going to victimize this stranger?

Yes. Yes, you are. The situation is dire.

“Hi darling!” You exclaim within earshot of the employee, before lowering your voice. “Could you help me out a little here?”

The man blinks, dazed for whatever reason. “Uh… sure?”

“Okay, then follow along and ask questions later,” you reply, and loop your arm through his gingerly. The touch of his fuzzy winter coat makes you relax a little. It is chocolate-colored, with beige fluff around the collar. Not now, you think to yourself, You need to stop thinking about sweets for one goddamn moment.

“Here he is,” you laugh sheepishly as you bring the man forward. Gosh, what in the heavens are you doing? You didn’t even ask his name. 

The employee stares, jaw agape. What’s with the reaction? He’s not that hot. 

“O-oh,” she responds. “That’s quite the surprise. I never knew. Congratulations, sir!”

You turn to look at him. He simply scratches his chin with a sheepish smile, and manages to respond with a “Thanks, Kimi.”

He must be a regular, you think. Oh, (Name), what did you get yourself into? You’re just gonna have to read his name off his coffee order first.

“We have a selection of samples for our wedding cake choices,” the girl, Kimi, moves to the far side of the counter, offering a small menu card to the two of you. “I know you’re not a big fan of wedding cakes, Mr. Lee, but the latest tiramisu flavors should suit your tastes, no?”

Just how close are they?! You chew on your lip and try to calm your depraved little heart.

“Well,” he responds, thinking for a second, “I actually hadn’t thought this far. What do you think, honey?”

He turns to you with a radiant smile, but you sense a hint of mischief. You don’t have time to think of that though—so you just change the topic. 

“Actually, do you have a Mont Blanc flavor? I’ve always had trouble perfecting it myself.”

Truth be told, that ‘honey’ had flowed from his lips and struck you straight in the heart. He’s not too bad to look at, you think now. His tousled hair catches the light with a playful sheen, framing his face and accentuating his disbelieving smile, while his fluffy coat adds a cozy touch to his charming, boyish demeanor. If you were to overthink a little, you’d find a hint of mischief in his voice. Alas, you’re a simple girl who only overthinks sweet treats, not boys.

“You bake?” He blurts, before his ears turn red from realization.

Kimi shoots him a puzzled look and your breath hitches in your throat. Was the miracle an idiot in disguise?

“I mean, uh, gosh, you make me so nervous, honey.” He looks like he’s trying his very best to ace an exam he never studied for. “I meant to ask if you're going to bake.. today? Don’t look at me like that.” 

Maybe you should’ve picked a candied apple and prayed that a witch had poisoned it. You can’t even force out a smile at that pathetic save.

“You’re a lucky man, Mister,” Kimi jabs, a look of distrust in her eyes before they flash to you. “I’m afraid Miss (Name) in a wedding dress would make me drop dead at the altar.”

“Oh, you- you flatter me,” you choke out, “I promise you wedding gowns aren’t my thing at all. Besides, you’d look beautiful in white yourself.”

Why is she so into this wedding conversation? How close are these two? You’re not sure how to react, and neither do you know how this man is going to explain your mysterious disappearance the next time he visits the bakery. You’re sure as hell not going to continue the act beyond this. It’s time you retired from this scam business. You’re not even sure how you’ll talk your way out of this with the man, currently engaged in small talk with Kimi. 

And— is he blushing?! Does he have something going on with the girl—Kimi? Did you just ruin something? Your heart tightens a little, and you have to physically restrain yourself from falling to the floor, head in your hands.

You laugh awkwardly, trying to diffuse the situation. When you open your mouth, you are interrupted.

“Actually, Miss, I think I take back what I said about the handsome part,” Kimi jokes, evident disdain sent towards Donghyuck.

Your natural response is a little laugh that leaves before you know it. Maybe, the feelings you sensed were of unrequited resentment. He does have the kind of face that looks like it’s often smacked by girls. No offense to him.

Kimi hands you the first sample (two delicious slices of Mont Blanc) and excuses herself to fetch the rest. The two of you make your way to a booth with the heaviest silence you’ve ever experienced. You might as well be at a funeral.

“So… free samples are that good, huh?” The man asks, raising an eyebrow. 

“Shut up,” you mutter. 

“I’m Donghyuck, by the way,” he responds with a youthful laugh. “Might I have the honor of knowing my fiance's name?”

“(Name). And stop looking at me like that.”

He lets out a short breath.

“You know, maybe we should’ve pretended it was an arranged marriage.”

“Quite proficient in the scamming business, are you?”

“Oh, you’re better off not knowing my dirty secrets.”

You couldn’t care less about his secrets but the look you shoot at him is certainly dirty.

He opens his mouth but you interrupt him to absolve yourself first. “Listen, I don’t do this often. And I’ll have you know it’s nothing personal. Well, not against you. The owner of this place maybe.”

Donghyuck blinks. “Oh? Do tell. I’m all for being a hater with my fiance.”

You stare at him, not impressed.

“Sorry.”

“Okay, so this started a month or two ago. I had been working tirelessly, testing recipe after recipe, trying to perfect the Mont Blanc cake. It was my dream to make it iconic, you know? But before I could even settle on the perfect combination of flavors, some smug bastard opens a bakery right across from me. And what does he have as his specialty? Why, the Mont Blanc cake of course. Seasonal! Cute, elaborate new decor every two weeks! Just how rich is he? I bet he doesn't even bother to create his own recipes. This guy didn’t just steal my idea, he’s turned my passion into some overpriced, generic trend!”

You heave, tired from the onslaught of frustration. Chewing on your lower lip, a pout naturally makes its way onto your face, and so do more complaints. 

“And that’s not all, okay? I never see him at the bakery. I refrain from entering my competitors' establishments unless I greet them in person. But this asshole is just never there! What, is he too good to work at his own bakery? Too good to grace us lowly bakers with a visit? How could he just swoop in and steal my signature item?”

Donghyuck listens to your rant with intent, cheek resting against his palm. He even looks a little ridiculously charmed right now. 

“Wait… so you’re the infamous Free Cake Phantom everyone’s talking about?” He gasps.

You’ve finally turned to your poor, neglected Mont Blanc sample, just for your heart to jump out. “What?”

“Just kidding. Your secret is safe,” he says, digging into the cake with infuriating nonchalance. “But hey, you’ve got good taste. This Mont Blanc though? It’s my personal recipe.”

Your fork halts halfway to your mouth. “Your recipe? What, you work here or something? And, no offense, but it’s overwhipped.”

If that’s a joke, it’s not very funny. The man looks more like a confectionary than a confectioner. There’s no way he works here. He’s probably some jobless guy drifting from bakery to bakery on early Saturday mornings.

His jaw drops. “Overwhipped? Are you kidding me?”

You wave the fork at him like it’s a weapon. “Chestnut puree shouldn’t have the texture of mousse. It’s called finesse, Mr. Lee.”

Before he can respond, Kimi returns with another tray, and you slip back into character, placing your hand on Donghyuck’s. “Thank you,” you coo at her. “I can’t wait to share all these flavors at our wedding.”

Donghyuck stiffens slightly at the unexpected contact, but he recovers quickly, plastering on the fakest grin known to man. “Anything for you, sweetheart.”

Kimi laughs. “You’re such a lovely couple. When’s the big day?”

You freeze, and so does Donghyuck. For a moment, neither of you has an answer.

“Oh, we’re still, uh, deciding,” you blurt, glancing at him for backup.

“Yeah, we’re thinking spring,” he adds smoothly. “Cherry blossoms. Very romantic.”

“Y-yes. Maybe the Raspberry Rose should be in the winner’s spot then.”

As Kimi bows politely and walks away again, Donghyuck leans in to whisper. “Should I book the honeymoon now, or…?”

“Don’t push your luck,” you hiss, elbowing him in the ribs. 

He makes a pained sound, but recovers quickly. 

The second flavor is dubbed “Marble Eclipse”, a decadent blend of rich chocolate and vanilla, perfectly balanced with a luscious buttercream frosting. You try to focus on the taste, but Donghyuck’s smug grin as he watches you take a bite is more distracting than you’d like to admit. You’re not easily flustered, not by men. Unfortunately, he would have been the exact type you’d have tried to nab in college.

You shake your head. Focus, (Name), you think to yourself, You’re in the enemy’s lair right now!

“So… I might as well come clean,” Donghyuck says with a serious tone, right after you’ve taken a bite. You pause in horror. What arcane knowledge is he going to use for your humiliation this time?

“I visit your bakery often, and I must say your selection is just as good, if not better.”

You exhale.

“Oh, it’s better alright,” you retort, before realizing the unwarranted passion in your voice. You compose yourself. “I mean, maybe their Mont Blanc is… a solid competitor.”

Donghyuck laughs, clearly amused by the bashfulness on your face.

“Wait, are you patronizing me?”

“Of course not!” He places his hand over his heart in mock hurt.

“I think the difference is that this one keeps up with the youth.” He waves his fork about, explaining his point further. “Everyone loves new, shiny things. Cycle those as much as possible. Have you ever considered holding blind box events with your cupcakes? I’m sure the kids would love to find out which flavor of panda bear cupcake they got—matcha, my personal favorite, or coconut cream, or… god forbid, chocolate mint. Ugh. Have you considered removing that from the menu? Anyway, that shouldn’t take too much time and money, right?”

The youth? What is he, forty? However, however, the look on his face as he describes your own baked goods to you is enough to make you intensely flustered. Has this man visited so often? And you never noticed him? How could you miss that easy-going smile?

A familiar figure saves you from whatever awkward, garbled response you were going to muster.

Despite Kimi’s arrival, Donghyuck has a hard time taking his eyes off you. Lashes swaying with each flicker of his eyes over your face, he’s hardly taking a bit of the delicious marble cake, in fact. What, have you got something on your face?

Kimi apologizes profusely before you can say anything to greet her. 

“There’s only one slice prepared for the Tiramisu Dream sample,” she explains. “I’m so sorry about this. Would you mind sharing this one? I apologize again.”

“No worries, Kimi,” Donghyuck responds, laughing a little. You shake your head and reassure it’s alright too. 

Anyway, that slice is going to be yours. You’re ready to pry it from his cold, dead hands.  

To your surprise, though, he shoots a friendly smile at you. 

“Want the first bite?”

“May I?” You ask, just to be sure.

“By all means,” he says, gesturing grandly. “After all, what’s mine is yours, fiance.”

You swear, if he calls you that one more time, he’s going to end up in the cake display.

Kimi stares at the two of you blankly for a moment. It instantly flusters you and Donghyuck both, so much so that the idiot digs his fork into the cake slice and holds it up to your lips with a soft ‘ah’ —and so much so that you actually accept it graciously. 

And all that only for Kimi to not even notice as she excused her way back to the counter. So now you’re just two idiots deep in your romantic charades. Donghyuck clears his throat, too late to cover his coral-tinted cheeks and ears. You’re certain you wear a similar expression.

“You’re- you’re so weird,” you jab, unable to come up with an insult higher than middle school grade. 

“What, you wanted me to do airplanes too?!”

“Take that fork and drive it through your tongue, will you?”

“Woah, woah, no need for violence, Miss (Name). Peace and Love.”

Unexpectedly, it makes you break character into unbound laughter. The weariness of the act and the silliness of the whole situation leaks into the sound, and it’s enough to make Donghyuck join in. For passersby, you are just a couple already past your third, fifth and seventh dates.

“Any comments for the tiramisu cake?” Donghyuck asks, grinning ear to ear.

You catch your breath, wiping a tear from the corner of your eye. “Yeah, I have a comment: who puts this much cocoa powder on top? Are you trying to choke your customers?”

“Awh, and I thought you were gonna be nice,” he whines, “Your smile is just so… inviting.”

As if on cue, he chokes on the cocoa powder. 

“I still like it,” you continue. “I’d just do it better.”

“I have the utmost confidence in that.”

Gosh, his smile is nauseating—too bright, too easy, like he’s actually enjoying this. Maybe he’s a rising actor, and you’re the one being hoodwinked. After all, who looks at someone like that on a first meeting?

A moment passes, and suddenly his thumb is at the corner of your lips, brushing off the cocoa powder with a touch so casual it feels anything but. “Got it,” he murmurs, and the air between you shifts, warm and oddly heavy.

“So, how do you know all this?” you ask, changing the topic. You’re forcing yourself to focus, to breathe. 

He leans back, a small laugh slipping out like he’s grateful for the lifeline. “You- uh- you could say I’m a connoisseur of pastries,” he offers, his voice lighter now. “I like to sample the best around town—just, you know, legally. I even take notes of my favorites.”

He gestures towards you, and you scoff.

The words settle between you as you toy with the edge of your skirt, smoothing the fabric down over your lap. There’s something about the way he speaks—so casual, so effortless—that needles at you. For a man so annoyingly confident, he sure seems relieved to have redirected the conversation.

Your hand grazes the tiny snowman buttons on your cardigan, tracing the cold plastic absentmindedly. His gaze flickers to the movement, then back to your face, a smile tugging at his lips like he’s trying not to laugh. You don’t know what’s more embarrassing—getting outed as the Cake Thief or the fact that he’s bound to know he flusters you.

You tilt your head, giving him a skeptical look. “How professional of you.”

The bite in your tone is softening, and you don’t like it one bit.

He holds up his hands, feigning surrender. “Hey, it’s an art. Someone’s gotta appreciate it, right?”

The faint chatter of other patrons fills the room, but his presence sharpens the moment, making it feel like it’s just the two of you. For a fleeting second, you catch yourself wondering what kind of person would take notes on pastries for fun. It’s so bizarrely specific, so utterly unnecessary—and yet, so like him.

His smile deepens, pulling you out of your thoughts. “You’re thinking about it, aren’t you?” he teases.

You roll your eyes, but there’s no stopping the traitorous grin threatening to break through. You refuse to indulge him, even as you feel the faintest crack in your defenses.

"Maybe,” you say, finally.

He chuckles, the sound warm and genuine, before leaning back against his chair with a satisfied air, as if he’s won something. You glance at the tray, willing yourself to focus on anything else.

How awkward. How warm. 

You spot a napkin fluttering off the table, carried by a sudden draft from the door. Instinctively, you step out of your chair to grab it, but Donghyuck beats you to it, scooping it up with an exaggerated flourish and a bow.

“Your knight in shining armor,” he declares dramatically, holding it out like a trophy.

“More like my nuisance in sugar-stained armor,” you retort, snatching it from his hand.

He laughs, unabashed. “Ah, so sharp. Yet here you are, sharing cake with said nuisance. Life is full of mysteries.”

“I’m just here for the cake,” you deadpan, dusting your hands off.

For a second, his smile falters—not in hurt but in sheer disbelief. He tilts his head, studying you with an incredulous expression, and you suddenly feel like a frog under a magnifying glass.

“You really don’t get it, do you?” he says, almost to himself, his voice low but still playful.

“Get what?” you ask, genuinely confused.

Donghyuck presses his lips together, fighting back a grin. He steps closer, leaning in just enough for you to catch the faint scent of chestnut cream. “I mean, I could spell it out for you, but that might ruin the fun.”

“Spell what out?” you press, a little flustered now.

He straightens with a laugh, shaking his head. “Nothing, you airhead. Absolutely nothing. Is your head full of cotton candy, by any chance?”

You narrow your eyes at him, but before you can respond, he’s already pulling his chair back, resuming his seat with a sigh.

“Mont Blanc, Marble Eclipse, and Tiramisu on the first date,” he states, deep in thought. “Maybe Matcha Lemon, Lavender Peach, and White Chocolate on the second… Perhaps a Red Velvet and a Strawberry Shortcake before you realize I literally own this place?”

You feel the heat intensify on your cheeks. You almost miss the last part, clouded by the implications of the rest of his words. He… wants to go on more dates with you? Was this a date all along? You’ve been swindled into having fun with a man somehow. He even knows the ins and outs of a baker’s life. And he’s charming in an oddball sort of way. You shouldn’t be feeling solidarity with this weirdo. But then again, somehow, his laugh is very… endearing. 

Wait a minute.

“You- you really own the place?!” A scream dies in your throat.

Donghyuck looks positively taken aback. “So you actually weren’t aware?!”

“What do you mean? How the hell am I supposed to know?! You described yourself as a connoisseur of pastries. I thought you were some kind of freelance failure so I didn’t pry!”

“Excuse me?!”

“Well, either that or you’re unbelievably rich. But then you don’t look it. Your sleeves have flour and oil stains on them, and your shoes are all dusty too, and there’s gold flakes in your hair—okay, how did I miss this?”

“Geez, way to judge someone by their looks. I’m not taking that from the local tart snatcher.”

The retort barely registers because your brain is too busy replaying the words “I own this place.” The realization hits, and before you can think better of it, the chair screeches back as you bolt upright.

“Wait, where are you—” Donghyuck’s voice is cut off by your shrill, mortified “Bye!” as you make a beeline for the door, leaving behind a very startled staff and a half-empty tray of cakes. Immediately after your exit, you let out a shriek. 

What the hell are you doing?!

Your face burns as you speed-walk down the street, each step punctuated by the memory of your impulsive retreat. You must have cast your senses away at that moment, like some wide-eyed fool in a fairy tale, almost charmed by that silly man and his absurd little quirks. It’s not your fault, of course—it’s his, with his flour-dusted sleeves, that stupidly endearing laugh, and the way he talked about pastries like they were a love language. What was wrong with him?! you think, conveniently ignoring the fact that it was your awkwardness and runaway theatrics that had caused the scene. You’d blame it on sugar overload if it weren’t for the nagging realization that maybe—just maybe—he’d gotten under your skin, and the fact that you deserved it.

. . .

You hadn’t expected to hear from him again. Not after your embarrassing getaway. But three days later, you’re staring at an email with the subject line: "Notice of Legal Action for Unauthorized Sampling."

You open it with trembling fingers, only to find what can only be described as the world’s most dramatic—and definitely fake—lawsuit. 

Your jaw drops as you scroll through the email. He’d even attached a fake case number: #CAKE-404-NO-FUN.

The body of the email was littered with ridiculous legalese. Phrases like "egregious acts of confectionery negligence" and "failure to properly appreciate artisanal craftsmanship" were scattered between absurdly specific accusations.

There is a diagram. An actual diagram. Arrows pointing to "Exhibit A" (the Mont Blanc) and "Exhibit B" (the empty spot on the tray), annotated with notes like "victim of hasty consumption" and "left to fend for itself."

And then, at the very bottom, there it was—the pièce de résistance:

“This suit may be settled by one (1) heartfelt apology and one (1) coffee date at the aforementioned bakery. Should you require legal counsel, I suggest bringing your A-game. I am, after all, a connoisseur of arguments… and pastries. 😉”

You groan, head thunking against the back of your chair. The audacity. The drama. The fuckass emojis. 

This man is getting to you.

Your first reaction is, of course, panic. Your second? Rage. And by the time you storm into the bakery at ass o’clock before it even opens, Donghyuck is waiting for you, leaning against the counter like he owns the place. (Which he does, actually.)

He’s propped on his elbows, his posture easy and unhurried, as if he’s been expecting you. The black apron around his waist is slightly askew, and his beige T-shirt bears faint streaks of flour across the chest, a testament to an already busy morning. His fluffy brown hair is an artful mess, the kind that looks unintentional but infuriatingly perfect, with a few errant strands curling over his forehead. There’s a streak of something golden—sugar, maybe?—on his cheek, catching the light as he tilts his head to regard you with an expression that’s equal parts curious and smug.

“You’re early,” he remarks, his voice low and teasing, as though he isn’t the root of all evil.

“You think this is funny?” you demand, shoving your phone in his face.

Donghyuck grins, unbothered. “Hilarious, actually. Did it get your attention?”

“You can’t just send someone a fake legal notice!”

“Worked, didn’t it?” He shrugs, leaning back with infuriating calmness. “Besides, you owed me an explanation for your Houdini act. You know, poor Kimi had to clear your tray. She almost cried.”

“She did not!”

As if on cue, Kimi pokes her head out of the kitchen. “Oh, she absolutely did. It was tragic,” she deadpans before ducking back in.

You groan, feeling your cheeks grow hotter by the second. “You’re unbelievable.”

Donghyuck leans back, smug as ever, and gestures to the email still open on your phone. “Unbelievable or resourceful? Let’s review: I sent a single, harmless message—full of creativity and wit, I might add—and look where we are.”

“At me wanting to strangle you?”

“At you running right to me,” he corrects, his grin widening. “What, were you worried?”

“Don’t flatter yourself,” you snap. “I’m here because—” 

You stop, realizing you don’t have a decent answer. “I didn’t want to give you the satisfaction of thinking I took you seriously.”

“Oh, you absolutely took me seriously.” He nods sagely. “I saw the panic in your eyes. Admit it: for a second, you thought you were going to have to pay me a hundred grand or grovel at my feet.”

“I- ugh- fuck you!” is all you can muster, stepping forward without thinking.

He mirrors your movement, the space between you shrinking by degrees. 

“But seriously, you ghosted me, and I had to get creative. What the hell was I supposed to do? I figured the legal drama might get my point across.”

“What point?”

“That I wanted to see you again.” The words come out so easily, so matter-of-fact, you don’t know how to respond. When you finally glance up, he’s watching you closely, his expression uncharacteristically sincere.

“Just because you’re all cute and covered in flour like the star of some indie chef movie doesn’t mean you get to toy with me.”

“Ha! You’re presumptuous—despite all the fine details on me you seem to observe.” He leans in. “But guess what, I’m a greedy bastard that loves attention. So, look closer.”

And you look anywhere but his lips, too pink and too plush, as your face grows hotter than a convection oven on broil.

“Don’t flatter yourself,” you manage, staring resolutely at the display of cakes. “That hardly counts as details.”

“Details,” he echoes, his grin growing wider. “Like the way I look at you?”

“You’re just a flirt,” you mutter.

He gasps, mock-offended, and gestures dramatically to the kitchen. “Kimi, did you hear that? I’m just a flirt!”

“You said it, not me,” Kimi calls back without missing a beat.

You laugh despite yourself, the sound surprising you. And Donghyuck doesn’t miss it. His gaze softens, the teasing edge in his voice dropping slightly. “There it is. I knew you could laugh without running away.”

You roll your eyes. “Don’t get used to it.”

“Too late.”

For a moment, the air shifts, the humor giving way to something quieter. Donghyuck’s gaze lingers—not on your awkward posture or flushed cheeks, but on you, as though trying to piece together something he doesn’t quite understand.

“What?” you finally ask, defensive.

“Nothing.” He shakes his head, but there’s a small, genuine smile now. “Just... you’re such a fidgety person.”

“Are you trying to shell out an insult?”

“No, I mean, I always see you scuttling here and there. Always on the move. Always observing, but never stopping long enough to be seen. You just… don’t seem like someone who takes much time for yourself.”

You blink, caught off guard. He tilts his head, like he’s trying to figure out if he’s crossed a line.

“I’m wrong?” he asks, almost sheepishly.

“I—” You pause, unsure of how to respond. “You’re nosy, that’s what you are.”

“That’s a yes,” he decides, grinning again.

Donghyuck chuckles, leaning just a little closer, his warm brown eyes locking onto yours. “Tell you what,” he says, his voice dropping to a murmur, “I’ll prove I’m not just nosy. Let me take you out. Somewhere you don’t have to bolt out the door halfway through.”

“You think I’d agree to that?” you retort, though your words lack bite. The proximity is doing something to your brain, and you’re acutely aware of how close he’s leaned in.

His grin is confident and infuriating. “I think you’d be curious enough to say yes.”

Your breath hitches as you realize how little space is left between the two of you, your noses almost brushing. “Woah,” you whisper, trying to play it off, “my mommy warned me about boys like you. All up close and personal with flour in their hair.”

He raises a brow, unrepentant. “Smart woman. But she didn’t tell you we’re pretty good at first dates, did she?”

You can’t help the laugh that escapes, soft but genuine. “Fine,” you say, straightening up and taking a step back before your pulse betrays you further. “But you’re paying. And no weird cakes this time.”

“Deal,” he replies, his smile softer now, more sincere.

And for a moment, you believe it—not just the act, not just the cakes and the banter, but the idea that maybe, somehow, this strange, sugar-dusted series of events has led to something real.

. . .

r/AmITheAsshole

u/YeastMode6969 • 16h

UPDATE: I faked my engagement for free cake samples then got sued after I ran away. AIO?

Fine, you guys were right. We’re dating now. Let’s just say we’ve been filling my cream puffs lately  🫠

Edit: I also got the Mont Blanc recipe!!

⥣ 7.7k ⥥ 3,297 Comments

kimikakes • 13h

KIMI HERE, REPORTING LIVE FROM THE SCENE: they literally argued over frosting consistency for half an hour yesterday. This relationship is built on chaos and croissants.

➥ Reply ⥣ 7.1k ⥥

bun_theory0222 • 2h

Hellooo where are the recipes. Priorities, OP :/

➥ Reply ⥣ 4.1k ⥥

lil_sugar_daddy0813 • 1h

man i was betting on donghyuck dying alone i dont wanna lose my $20

➥ Reply ⥣ 1.3k ⥥

muffinbutdrama1122 • 1h Give me your money NYEOW ➥ Reply ⥣ 1.7k ⥥

soggywaffle0205 • 6m why are you suddenly a furry ➥ Reply ⥣ 1.1k ⥥

muffinbutdrama1122 • 1h pays the bills ➥ Reply ⥣ 2.7k ⥥

[itgetzweird08]

one two three four

katsuki bakugo x Gn!reader

“What's up your ass?”

Mitsuki asked her son as she tailored his suit. It was the weekend, which meant he was at home. While he was there his mother insisted on fitting him for his suit, despite the dance being a month away. “Nothing hag, stay out of my damn-“ Katsuki didn’t even finish his sentence before his mom smacked him in the back of his head. “WHO YOU CALLIN HAG? THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?” Katsuki’s palm’s sparked in anger but before he could retaliate, his father chimed in from the desk in the corner of his parents’ work room. “Katsuki, we can tell when something’s wrong. What is it, son?” His dad’s eyes were soft, and Katsuki (reluctantly) backed down. He always had a soft spot for his dad. “Nothing- I just think this dance is fucking pointless.”

Mitsuki tilted her head in confusion as she fiddled with Katsuki’s pant leg. “Why? You fuckin love dressing up, as much as you pretend not to. You are our son after all.” and that was true, being the son of two of Japan’s most popular designers did make Katsuki have a passion for fashion. While he did prefer street wear, he appreciated a good suit every once in a while.

“Cuz y/n won’t be here to be my date and I ain’t taking no one else. Plus, even if I wanted to, half the class is paired up already. Better off not even fuckin going”

it was rare to see Katsuki pout, but this was one of the rare times he would do so. He always pouted when he thought about how far away from him you were. If he thought about how much he missed you for too long, he would try to busy himself with something else. It made him pretty productive, actually. Your face popping up on his mind a bit too much? He does his homework early to distract himself. When his heart is calling for you? He heads to the gym and blasts music in his ears to drown out the wistful thinking. But he couldn’t do that right now. All he can do now is stand here and wish for your presence.

Katsuki had told his parents about you right before the war. Actually, if he had died during the battle, he made them swear that they would give you his favorite skull tshirt and a letter he wrote. Luckily though, while it was a close call, that never had to happen. But since then, you’ve talked to his parents a few times. His mom, to your surprise, was especially fond of you and would always ask Katsuki about you when they saw him. It didn’t bother him though, he would take any excuse to talk and brag about his person.

“It’s a shame y/n won’t be able to be there, but you shouldn’t throw away the whole dance because of it. Plus I’m sure it would break their heart if they found out you weren’t going because of them.” Masaru told his son softly, only earning a shrug in response. Katsuki knew his father was right, but he was still disappointed. Mitsuki stood up and ruffled Katsuki’s hair, which earned her a glare that she completely ignored. “Have fun at the dance, brat. That way, you can tell y/n all about it when it’s over.”

———

After Katsuki had gone back to the dorms, Misaru and Mitsuki sat together on the couch. Misaru held his wife close, playing with her blonde, spikey hair as Drag Race played on the television. While her husband was locked into the show, Mistuki couldn’t focus. In fact, her mind was completely elsewhere. She couldn’t help the way her heart ached for her son. As often as they butt heads and argued, he was her only child and her baby. He had been through so much in the past three years, and she only wanted the best for him. She was always so supportive of his hopes and dreams, and only wanted him to be happy. He deserved it. It pissed her off that even during a time for celebration and happiness, her son would still be upset because he couldn’t bring the person he cared for most.

As the commercials rolled, Mitsaru looked down at his wife, and pressed a soft kiss to her head. “What’s wrong?” He asked her, earning a grumble in response as she looked up at him. “M’just thinkin bout Katsuki… it ain’t fair that he’s put his entire fuvking life on the line to save the damn country, hell the world even, but he can’t have this one thing. I just…” she sighed heavily, yet Misaru understood. He reflected her feelings as well. He wanted Katsuki to be happy with his friends at this party. Gears in his head began to turn, as between him and his wife, he was the problem solver. He used logic and empathy to solve issues, as Mitsuki usually charged in head first.

After a moment though, a light bulb went off in his head. “Mitsuki…have we asked if she can’t come? I mean, I’m sure Principal Nezu would understand. All Might as well, he’s fond of Katsuki and has a lot of connections. We should see if anything can be done!”

Mitsuki was silent for a bit as she thought about the suggestion, and eventually sat up and turned to Misaru. She beamed brightly, pressing a kiss to his lips. “I knew I married you for a reason. I can send Nezu an email and set up the meeting…but let’s keep this from the brat for now, I don’t wanna get his hopes up.”

———

A/N: a little shorter but next chapter is pretty long! FYI, in the back of my mind, reader is the same reader from my endeavor’s secret daughter one shot. But that’s just me!! It’s not required to read that to enjoy this, it’s just a fun little tid bit. I’m gonna try and finish this mini series within a week because I have to move into my dorm in a couple weeks. Lmk if you want to be tagged going forward!

———

Tag List: @sleepyeri @teeesthings @zaiban2989 @kathsuhki @rinbeeyum @oladelmars @getosuckers @luv-for-fictional-characters @attackonnat @ratcity12345 @bffrs-stuff @ch3rryjampi3 @venus1224idkpleaze @fiannee @consentismfhot @abcdefghijklmmopqrstuvwxyz @bl-og134

[raynehmms]

“𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐧 𝐈 𝐬𝐚𝐲 𝐰𝐞𝐚𝐤 𝐚𝐬𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐬𝐚𝐲 𝐛𝐢𝐭𝐜𝐡”

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜. .

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・

“Nigga you not shit.” “Look I said sorry I don’t know what else you want me-“ “bitch I’ll beat yo ass all you do is talk all that I’m sorry shit. I’m done have fun.” You turn around your platinum blonde side part swaying behind you.

“Who the fuck you calling a bitch?” Ony’s eyebrows furrowed together as he stands up and walks up to you, pulling your arm forcing you to face him.

“Nigga I’m talking to you!! And yo bitch ass!! Who the fuck you think I am to run back to yo stupid ass? Nigga you cheated. End of story I should beat yo ass.” You put your finger in his face, stepping up to him and yelling in his face. “Yo ma calm down.” He says looking you directly into your eyes his face not showing any emotion. “Calm down?!? Calm down??? Bitch I’ll beat you and that bitch ass wait til I catch her ass. Imma fuck ha ass up.” You punch your hand as you walk away from him and out the door and he follows you.

“Look I don’t know what else you want me to say I said sorry isn’t that enough??” You ignore him and walk to your car slamming my the door behind you and pulling off immediately afterwards.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

A week later you get a call from one of his friends, “wassup” you answer without checking the caller id. “You and Ony! Still arguing?” You look up and check the caller id and roll your eyes ``there isn’t anything to argue about.” You laugh. “He a bitch and that’s that. HE wanna go fuck the whole city then he can go do that not finna dwell on no bitch ass nigga that couldn’t handle me anyways.” “Damn that’s how you feel?” You chuckle lightly. “Yea now if you would excuse me I have a life to live that doesn’t include you or the rest of yo bitch ass friends. Have fun on my block list.” You hand up the phone blocking him along with the rest of his friends.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

Ngl kinda wrote this cuz I been reading ffs lately where the reader is like…..a bitch about EVERYTHING like weak and it’s pissing me off I’m def turning this into a series to keep me motivated to write, so if you want to see this again just lmk who could be another love interest when (idk)! But some more nicer and …..softer ffs will come out either in Christmas on after idk.

[ifimdreaming]

i don’t deserve you

//

Luke Hughes x Reader

authors note: i wrote this super quick and also on my phone so idk the word count or if this even makes sense because it is unedited lmaooo but I hope you enjoy it!

-

You had just hopped out of the shower and were putting on uour leggings and one of lukes hoodies to wear for the day.

You hadnt really been wearing anything besides for lukes hoodies when you have a day at home since you two started dating so honestly it was nothing new.

Going back to your room after cleaning up the rest of your stuff in the bathroom, you remembered you forgot to text Luke back last night. he always gets on you about that but you always forget how worried he gets when you don’t reply to his calls or texts.

And when you head to look at your phone that’s plugged into the charger on your bedside table, you see many missed notifications from your worried boyfriend.

(4 missed called from: Lukey @ 10:37am)

Lukey: hey you said you’d call me at 10?

Lukey: call me back pls

it was now nearing 12:00pm and you knew he would be more than a little bit pissed off that you weren’t answering him.

and you felt terrible about forgetting so you unplug your phone and called him back right away, sat on your bed with a towel around yojr hair as the phone rings in suspense.

“baby? ...let me guess? you forgot to check your phone again?..” he quickly says as you are getting more comfortable on the bed, relieved he had answered your call.

You just hum in response as he pours out his concern to you, knowing that all he’s saying is true.

“i’m so so sorry. i completely forgot. i know you’re looking out for me but i fell asleep without texting and i literally just got out of the shower.” You say and hear him sigh at your words.

“Luke i promise i’ll try to keep my phone close by cuz i know you worry...but i’m fine i promise” you say apologetically .

“i didn’t get murdered or anything..” you add jokingly but quickly follow up with an “i’m kidding...” before luke gets a chance to be a smart ass and tell you not to joke about that.

You laugh a little hearing him sigh with an unamused tone in his voice.

“anyway, how are you?” You ask trying to move on from the subject knowing he is already annoyed about you not answering his calls.

“i really miss you...” he sighs out and you hear the little bit of sadness in his voice and instantly feel exactly how he’s feeling.

“i miss you more bubs...trust me time will fly by way faster than you know it…we’ll see each other soon..i promise.” You reassure him, not trying to sound too cheesy but also trying to lift his spirits somewhat.

it’s been over 2 months since you’ve seen each other last. School has picked up and made it impossible to be able to visit him in jersey, even just for a weekend.

You were starting to forget a time where it actually was easy to see each other.

And you were getting so used to late night phone calls to one another, and luke sending you random long ass text messages about how much he misses you at random hours of the night. and you being so fed up with everything that you cave and just call him even when you know he’s busy or at practice, because you miss hearing his voice so much.

“it’s just been so long since i’ve seen your face. ugh i hate this shit so much. i’m just... so fucking over it.” Luke continues pouring out and his words are laced with a bit of anger, causing his voice to have a scratchy and dark quality.

he’s clearly getting more and more frustrated about the current situation the longer it goes on and you know he’s getting irritated with only being able to talk on the phone and over facetime. we both are.

“Luke i understand... i miss you and i love you so much. And look, i know you’re upset but there’s really not much we can do about it right now is there?” You say before luke interrupts you with a loud sigh.

“hey what can i do though? huh? ...how can i help you feel better?” You ask with as much reassurance in your voice as possible, trying hard to keep your voice high and uplifting even though youre feeling just as down and unhappy as he is right now.

he doesn’t answer and you are sat in silence for too long to still be expecting him to answer your question.

“what’s on your mind? Will u just talk to me?” You ask innocently.

“ugh. fuck! i don’t know! nothing i guess.” Luke sighs out, raising his voice and catching you off guard.

“i’m just trying to help … can you calm down a little..” you say quietly because you know he was probably wound up about a lot of stuff on his mind and you can tell that he is putting his anger in the wrong places.

“you don’t need to tell me to calm down...there’s nothing you can do ok? it’s fucking awful. i hate this...fuck..” he spits out at me. “can we just talk about something else?” he asks with his voice still raised.

“look, im not trying to force you to talk to me if you don’t want to but you called me and clearly something is on your mind..whether it’s the fact that we can’t be together right now or something else but you can’t just get angry with me for no reason.” You say sternly and hear him about to say something more but you interrupt him “just please lower your voice...” you add.

“i’m not getting angry. i’m just really fucking annoyed and you’re not helping” he says exasperatedly and you are taken by surprise with his words and a little pissed off that he’s taking out whatever he is angry about at you.

You stay silent on the other end of the phone as his words instantly put tears into yohr eyes and you don’t say anything because he is being so unnecessarily rude to you.

“i’m sorry, i’m just having a really fucking bad day...” he adds and you hold your breath trying to not make your shaky breathing noticeable as he keep talking.

You begin to feel the tears slowly start to stream down your face but you quickly blink them away knowing he’s only mad about the situation and not worth yours tears. but his words made you feel so so hurt.

there’s silence between the both of you for a few seconds as you try to get yourself together and acknowledge that he hurt you.

“Ok. Im not gonna sit here and listen to you complain about something that i literally cannot fix or change right now. i’m sorry you’re feeling upset and angry with what’s going on but you can’t just call me and take all your fucking anger out on me. it’s just not fair. i really miss you too ok? ...i’m sorry we can’t be together right now but i can’t do anything to help if you’re not going to tell me what’s actually wrong...just...call me back when you calm down a little” you say trying your hardest to not raise your voice and lash out exactly like he just did to you.

he’s quiet on the other side of the phone and you hear him about to reply as you hang up the phone before he has the chance to respond, knowing you are probably not going to like or want to hear what he has to say to you at this moment anyway.

this isn’t the first conversation that’s went like this recently. this past week luke has been getting more and more pissed off and angry rather than just upset about you not being able to see each other right now and it’s not doing you any good.

Youve been trying your hardest to just hear him out and be there for him but today’s conversation was different, usually you share a mutual sadness about not being able to see each other and talk about all the things you miss and then it cheers you both up hearing all the fun things you can do together once exams and the hockey season ends.

but today luke wouldn’t even tell you what was bothering him without getting mad and it didn’t help that he was putting his anger towards you.

Feeling really frustrated about that conversation, you plug your phone back into the charger and start to feel a slight sinking in your stomach.

You hated the fact that you just hung up on him and didn’t resolve your discussion. And you knkw it was his fault for getting angry at you but can’t help but feel a little guilty for just hanging up the phone without saying goodbye.

to get your mind off of it for a while you start tidying up your room and play some music to drown out the silence.

Now it’s almost nearing 2pm and luke hasn’t called back or even texted and it’s been almost an hour.

You begin to get more and more pissed off that he hasn’t said anything and consider just sending him a text but you remember the things he said to you . so you ignore the feeling and continue waiting for him to call you back.

-

After deciding to lay down and read a book to distract yourself, you accidentally fell asleep for a few hours. Waking up to see that it’s around 6pm...you definitely slept longer than you should have.

Surprisingly, you see that luke tried calling back and left a few texts as well.

Lukey: hi

Lukey: i’m really sorry about earlier

Lukey: can you call me back please? i need to apologize...i didn’t mean to get upset at you. i know none of this is your fault

Lukey: please call me back

You decide not to answer him right away and start making yourself some mac and cheese and sitting at the dining room table waiting as you wait for the water to boil.

You were beginning to get so impatient. Impatient with everything, but especially with luke. You wanted him to call you again. Do something, say something. Try harder.

Your thoughts were spiraling and you knew calling him back was really the only way to stop them.

After finishing making and eating your dinner you sit down at the couch to finally call luke back. at this point your stupid argument definitely didn’t feel worth all this and you felt a little guilty for ignoring him all day long.

You ultimately decide to facetime him so you can see his face and he answers you on the second ring.

immediately you see him laying down in his bed wearing no shirt and his wet hair hanging down his face on one side and his face slightly smushed against his pillow.

he smiles at you knowingly and waits for you to say something so that he knows if i’m still angry at him or not.

“why are you staring at me?” You blush a little, ignoring your anger for a moment. he just smiles back at you with his pretty little face and completely ignores the question.

Luke sees you awkward laugh a little feeling a bit insecure with the way he’s staring at you, but he continues. and he laughs lightly as he sits up and turns the light on so that you can see him better.

“i’m really really sorry baby...” he starts “i’m sorry for getting upset at you. I shouldn’t have done that. i was just so fed up and tired of not being able to see you and i let my feelings get the best of me, i also was just having a really shitty day. Practice fucking sucked today and you already know how shitty our game has been lately.” He says with honest sincerity and regret in his voice.

“i took my anger out at you which i should not have done...and im really not trying to make any excuses because I know i hurt you. And i promise i won’t get mad at you about this ever again, especially since you did absolutely nothing wrong...” he spills out apologetically.

You say nothing at first and just wait for him to continue his apology. making it clear to him that he was completely out of hand and you are not gonna put up with his bitchy attitude. And he continues,

“... to be honest i’ve been feeling like you don’t miss me as much as i miss you which sounds stupid but i just got so angry because i didn’t understand. When you forget to call or text i just…i take it hard..” he says trailing off at the end.

“what? luke i’ve been trying so hard to keep it together for you because i know how upset this makes you. trust me when i tell you i miss you more than anything...i suck at remembering things like texting goodnight and stuff because I’ve just been so exhausted with work and school. You’re on my mind all the time and i promise you that i will try harder to not forget those things.” you quickly reply, making sure he understands just how much you mean it.

“i love you so much.” You add and smile at him as uou see his small smile on your phone screen.

“i love you too baby. i’m so sorry for getting mad..” he says quietly and puts his head down a little.

“it’s ok...i understand your frustration.” You add with a little laugh letting him know you’re over it.

“i saw your instagram story..” you change the subject and he smiles at you with his face getting a bit red.

“You posted us?” You say knowingly as he smirks at you and runs his hands through his hair.

Luke had posted a slightly blurry photo of the two of you on the boat last summer saying he misses both the summer and you. It made you melt to see him gush about you, especially because he was typically such a private person.

“You are so cute..” you say honestly. and youstart to laugh a little remembering that night on the boat together and how it was the night luke asked you to be his girlfriend.

Luke wasnt always the most romantic person but he put so much thought into that night, his words, every little thing he planned he put so much care into and it was such a beautiful moment.

You would never forget it.

“im glad you saw it. i wanted to show you how much you mean to me..and how sorry i was.” he chuckles and it makes you softly laugh, knowing the world would have no idea that post was technically an apology to you.

“will you stay on FaceTime with me tonight? i miss falling asleep with you…” you ask politely and luke nods his head and smiles at you.

“of course...” he replies.

“i’m glad you’re not mad at me anymore baby” He says quietly.

“I could never stay mad at you..” you say knowing how true of a statement it honestly was.

“...and I don’t deserve you” luke says almost in a whisper, seemingly more to himself as opposed to you

-

-

[toomiieimagiines]

Akito kissing hcs

EEEEK! i actually am a fan of akito!!^_^ i think he’s very handsome! tell me what you think about these banners! i’m loving it unfortunately… makes it so much easier to make ‘em! obligatory sorry for OOCness, i don’t read the story’s half as much as i should!^_^” (omg also i wrote this while drinking a diet baja blast OMGGGG it’s so good)

Akito Shinonome kissing hc’s + more!!

He’s such a bully!

He knows how much you love kissing him, and uses it against you…

He can be seriously unbelievable…

Like he will give you the bestest kiss and than just…. leave you there

Will give a super super mean oblivious laugh when you ask him where he’s going…

“Huhhh? I thought we were finished, I have rehearsal, y’know..”

Messes with you cuz he knows it’ll make you so so frustrated:(

He’s really not trying to be mean!! He just loves you so much, and thinks that your angry face is really cute…

I wish I could say his lips aren’t chapped…

Literally LAYERS on chapstick too. He doesn’t know why it never works, and refuses to use the heavy duty ones because they “taste bad”

Tastes citrusy, he refuses to admit that he puts chapstick on

Will sometimes also taste like coffee (He likes it sweet, please don’t make fun of him. He really did try to be a bad boy and drink it black, he almost threw up.)

Is kinda rough if he’s had a bad day…

Bit your lip a little too hard one day and it started bleeding… He felt really bad…

Can and WILL grab you by the waist though… He’s not heartless! He can be a gentleman!

He is NOT above the occasional cheek cup if he’s feeling nice!

Talks smack and all, but one time he followed your kiss when you tried to break apart…

He was really embarrassed… needed a couple hours to stare at the wall

He knew then that every dynamic he thought you two had was a lie….

another mini fic!! >_< sorry if my posts have been feeling short, none of the asks i’ve answered have sparked me with enough inspiration for something long…^_^|||~ reminder you don’t have to only send pjsk asks! i’m in almost every fandom… =_=

Sometimes you wonder if your boyfriend enjoys watching you suffer, and it may sound weird to say it out loud, but you’re truly starting to believe he’s a sadist! What other explanation could there be for something this cruel?! It’s been about half an hour since you’ve given up, but you can’t stop thinking about it.

“Babe,” he chuckles, relishing in your frustrated expression. “Quit pouting, you’re being quiet.”

“‘M not pouting,” You defend. Spoiler alert, you WERE pouting, but you can’t help it! You’ve tried to go in for a kiss three times already, and he’s ‘coincidentally’ not noticed. He has to notice! There’s no way he’s hasn’t!

“Sure…” He laughs again, and that royally pissed you off. Just that boyish grin was enough to make you faint for a million years! How dare he do this to you?! You let out a noise of annoyance.

“I’m gonna get you, even if it kills me!” You let go of his hand, deciding to stuff yours in your - well technically his, since you’re wearing his jacket- pockets. This makes his eye twitch.

“What are you even talking about?” He snatches your hand back out of your pocket, and you can’t help but laugh - despite the frustration. He obviously can’t stomach the taste of his own medicine, so you pull your hand away again - much to his displeasure. “Quit doin’ that!” He stops walking, deciding to grab both of your hands.

“Doing what??” You play dumb, mocking his original cockiness as you pull your hands away.

“Doing that! Hold my han-“ He stops, realizing what’s happening, “you’re petty. You’re REALLY petty. I did that like 30 minutes ago!”

“If you let me kiss you I’ll hold your hand again.” You offer, shrugging with fake indifference. He sighs, he feels like a dog begging for a bone. He shouldn’t have teased you…

“You make me act like a total chump, I don’t like it.” He grumbles, leaning down slightly to give you better access, you intertwine your hands. HA! You won.

You close the gap, feeling his lips against yours. They’re slightly chapped, tasting of a fruit you can’t quite put your finger on. Your heart immediately settled, enjoying the warm feeling of your boyfriend. It feels like you’re mad for eachother, the shape of his lips molding into yours perfectly. The two of you stayed there for a while, before you realized a full out makeout session in public isn’t the best look for either of you. But as you tried to pull away, you found a stumbling Akito following the kiss, almost falling on top of you. His eyes shoot open once he realized what he just did

“I-“ His face is red when he looks away, you snicker. “I didn’t mean to do that!”

“You love me!~” You say in a sing-song tone, teasing him.

“I-“ He sighs, sounding defeated. “I do!…”

He was spacey for the rest of your walk home, staring down at the pavement. All he could think of is how weak he is to you.

‘God, I’m totally whipped!’

[yncoreee]

CAN’T STAY MAD AT YOU. Hayeon x reader

Synopsis— she swears she can’t stay mad at you if you keep on being unintentionally cute.

Warnings .ᐟ Requested, established relationship, they kiss like one very short kiss like the story, bae is used like once as well, hayeon is lowkey mean in the beginning but they’re lovers, lovers do what they do (idk), wrote this on tumblr cuz I was too lazy to be switching from google docs to tumblr

꩜ — ⵌWord count no word count cuz I wrote this shit directly in tumblr :/

Earlier this morning, you and your girlfriend had gotten into an argument because of who’s the cause of the both of you getting late?

Well even though you both walked out of the same home, into the same transport, inside the same school, sitting in the same classroom you didn’t bother to talk to each other. Only stealing secret glances.

She started to talk to you but not in a very nice way.

Hayeon would say “you’re so annoying and stupid” or “stop staring at me, I don’t like it” forming up lies just to piss you off.

Even though you were inches from biting back, you decided to maintain your cool not wanting to seem reactive or anything.

Ignoring her rude and malicious comments you looked out of the classroom window. Admiring the cherry blossom tree which was just newly planted.

A small smile tugged by the corner of your lips.

“Ugh can you stop being annoying??” Hayeon huffed rolling her eyes.

“Being annoying?? You’re being annoying! I’m not even doing anything” you shrieked folding your arms over your chest.

“That’s the thing… you’re not doing anything but being unintentionally cute” she spoke in clear frustration, audible enough for you to hear.

“Huh?”

“Ughhhh don’t you get it??? You’re too cute, I can’t Stay mad at you!” She grumbled looking away from you, staring outside the window.

A small grin appeared on your lips as you leaned your chair closer to her, resting on her desk. “You think I’m cute eh?” You asked indirectly teasing her.

She mumbled curses knowing her red and embarrassed face was evident. “Yes…I do…now go away or you might give me a heart attack!” She pushed you off her desk.

You giggled at her flustered face, leaning in one more time to place a short soft kiss on her lips.

“Ooo ice cream! Yeon can I please get some?” You pleaded with puppy eyes, both of your hands clasped together.

“I—but the last time we got ice cream, you had a serious cold” she asked a hint of worry in her voice.

“I promise! I’ll try not to get sick or take too many of it, can I please get ice cream now?” You pleaded, your hands clinging onto the hem of her blazer.

Letting out a sigh, hayeon pulled out her wallet from the small pocket in her bag, handing money over to the ice cream man.

“Here you go” she said handing you the freshly scooped ice cream.

“Yay yay yay, thank you bae!!” You rejoiced taking a small bite of the ice cream, feeling your Brain freeze at the familiar cold sensation.

Hayeon sighed dreamily wondering how she even got mad at you I’m the first place. It’s high key impossible to hold grudges with you.

She thinks your cuteness might be the cause of her death one day.

[dogstarmoonheart]

Im pissed here ⬇️ This is a rant made mid-rage

written after an encounter with one of those bloggers who hate everything that isn’t canon and dislikes Wolfstar and throws up from the thought of Jegulus (?).

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

First of all, there are a lot of tropes I don't really like and that I don't take part of. I, for one, like my Lupin awkward and scrawny, not like a cool casanova. I struggle to see the beauty of making Regulus all soft and dovy, as his personality from the start has been based on the fact that he's cold, hurt and uptight. I have never read Y/N as I feel conflicted with the arrangement. WITH THAT SAID, I feel no bloody need to point out, complain or talk poorly about those who do enjoy these things.

I'm a big jily fan. I was 13 (isch??) when I entered the fandom and back then “jegulus” wasn’t a thing. (I've grown to enjoy the "jegulus ship" though, and some of my favorite fics are jegulus-centered.)

I get people being like:

“huh jegulus? how would that even???”

and I also get people who hold onto jily like a life jacket.

BUT for the love of the gods, that doesn't mean people need to be such c*nts.

“This fandom has gotten out of hand”

“I don’t like it when people make ships that aren’t canon” (????? why are you here then?????)

and also people who are so butt-hurt bc. of adaptions and interpretations, like??? what do you think a fandom does???

“That character would never act like that” DO YOU FUCKING KNOW THEM PERSONALLY??

“that’s not realistic at all” your mom’s not realistic at all.

“rosekiller is so offensive” YOU ARE OFFENSIVE

you’re literally 40 go AWAY.

If you want it to be 100% accurate to the books, read. the. fucking. books??????

I’m not speaking for those who change a character to unrecognition, but I stumble upon people who are still mad about Wolfstar??? And it pisses me off dawg. It pisses me off.

Don’t attack people who enjoy non-canon queerness or a cool Remus Lupin or (gods forbid) a kind ratboy (you know he’s my everything)

Kindly piss off Karen (of course not if ur lovely, and happen to be named Karen, you stay right where you are <3)

Sorry, I had to get that out of mi system. Just think it’s bollocks that people can’t just sit back and shut up.

FYI: This house (blog) is safe to all and I hope ye kno’ that nasty hags are just hiding their weird ass values behind the statement “it’s not canon”. They themselves are mucky. They are a bad joke with a borin' punchline ;)

• • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •• • • • • • • •

I wanted to share this cuz even if it might not make complete sense (as I wrote it in fury at 3 am) it’s a good enough reminder that yeh should stay gay, stay loud, and keep making old angry people mad. Ship weird shit and idk..make James an emo just to piss somebody off, who gives a shit.

kisses my sweets

[olderthannetfic]

I kinda understand “minors don’t interact” and similar things, but one thing I always laugh at is “don’t tag as [thing].” You know — the whole don’t tag posts with the word queer in them as q slur, don’t tag not-inherently-shippy art as ship, don’t tag character posts as kin, etc. First of all, what would you do if someone DOES tag it like that? Call the cops? Second of all, people are gonna tag things however they want, you’re gonna have to deal with that on a website like tumblr.

There’s a similar phenomenon on Twitter where people say “don’t quote retweet”/“don’t private quote retweet” (which is especially funny cuz everyone is gonna see that and go on their private accounts and quote retweet with nonsense to piss you off, lmao)

Like if you’re really SO FUCKING SCARED of your gay post being tagged as #q slur, your Death Note edit being tagged as #Lawlight, your fanart being tagged as #kin, you probably shouldn’t be on the internet. Do you have the right to not view queer as a slur, the right to not ship whatever, the right to not like fictionkin? Of course! But people also have the right to disagree with you and tag your post however the fuck they want. One time I saw someone tag one of my cosplays as [character] faceclaim, and I was a little bit weirded out, but overall it was harmless. I never once considered adding a banner saying not to tag my likeness as a faceclaim, because if I really want to prevent anyone from doing that, the solution will be for me to not show my face online.

Small tangent: When I was younger I used to have a private sideblog that was basically just a venting diary. No one had the password, and, because it was private, my URL wouldn’t show up in the notes if I reblogged something to that blog. Basically, no one knew the blog existed. And I remember sometimes I would see a cool post on my dash, or in tags, and it would be tagged as #dont reblog (this was before tumblr had the option to limit reblogs obviously). And if the post was cool (or edgy, because like I said… vent blog) and I was sad that I “couldn’t” reblog it, I’d reblog it to the side blog, where OP would never know 😭 Rebellious as hell wasn’t I?

That being said — and this might contradict everything I just wrote — I do think people that brag about not reading/not following DNIs are also a bit obnoxious. Not people who just make statements that they don’t read them, but people who make it known how much they hate their existence. It just seems kinda edgelord-y? Idk. Obviously it’s fine to not read them or like them but making it a huge statement is just like…ok? Congratulations? Should we throw you a party? Should we invite Elon Musk?

I have followers—and follow people—who have “Antis DNI” in their bio. I also have followers and follow people who have “Proshippers DNI” in their bio. No one will ever know what side I’m on 😜😜😜😜

--

[11queensupreme11]

I didn’t finish my au about Percy getting teleported into the hobbit but it posted it anyway 🫥…

Au:

Throughout the entire quest Percy has killed so many Orcs and monsters with ease making Gandalf curious…how does she have a sword?..how is she so good with a weapon if she’s just a teenage girl?…Gandalf becomes suspicious but doesn’t find out she’s a child of the gods until they are surrounded by Azog and his followers..As Thorin was about to be killed bilbo is about to save him but instead Percy saves Thorin first.finally showing some of her power when defends Thorin…since I suck at describing fight scenes I’ll let it to your imagination…when the eagles save all of them Percy used her healing powers to heal Thorin a injuries shocking them more now knowing they had a child of the gods on their side..so they promise to help her find a way home and azog..ooohh azog…he knows now too…and he doesn’t keep quiet about it now everyone in all of middle earth the Mirkwood elves,the elves in Rivendell,dwarves,kings and queens all now hear that the company of Thorin Oakenshield have a god on their side making everyone shocked….and when they finally take Erabor back from Smaug Thorin becomes greedy..he forbids her from leaving and tries to control Percy into doing his every will and give him more power but when she refuses he tries to kill her and gets his butt beat..and because of that Percy goes with bilbo to give the Arkenstone to Thranduil and bard..they were both worried about the company being too powerful with a child of the gods on their side and the fact they don’t even know what the child of the gods look like so when bilbo arrives with Percy they don’t recognize her..so when they find out she is the child of the gods they try to convince Percy to join them and help them take down Thorin..she wants to deny and she only wants to go home..but they disagree Thranduil..Because he finally had someone powerful enough to steal back his wife’s gems..(and maybe because Percy reminds him of his wife very much) and Bard because Percy can help and protect the people of lake town..(also because he sees her as his child)..Gandalf wants her because she can help stop the war and she can help protect the company..during the beginning of the five armies the company demand Percy comes back while the Thranduil and bard demands she comes on their side..then Thorins cousin arrives and some hen he sees Percy he demands Percy is on their side…they all want Percy on their side so they all fight over it..then when azog comes he wants Percy so he can have more power(obviously) and joins the fight…and I’m getting very tired so Im sorry if I was very lazy with the ending..when Thorin comes to his senses and the army of elves,men, and dwarves reluctantly join together Percy finally joins the fight and uses a lot of her power taking down a lot of orcs…and she saves fili and Kili in the process..after the war they still fight over her but surprise surprise the summoning had a limited amount of time so while they fight over her she is sent away pissing them off as they try to summon her back..it never works again until…she is summoned again by the fellowship in the LOTR….thats all I got tell me if this idea is crap or not cause I think it would be a good story…especially if you wrote it..feel free to ignore this I just had an idea…

THERE'S MORE 🥳

"Thorin becomes greedy..he forbids her from leaving and tries to control Percy into doing his every will and give him more power but when she refuses he tries to kill her and gets his butt beat"

i got mixed results on thorin's height (saying he's 5'2" or between 4'5"-4'8") but he's a shortie regardless so i'm just imagining percy easily kicking him over LMAO

and thranduil.... 🤤

that name just awakened something in me.... 🤤 🤤 🤤

im pretty sure i had a huge ass crush on him when i was a kid (i'm probably gonna start looking at thranduil fics cuz of you lol)

[miraitenshi]

Not addy trending on Jirai/fashion twt again for being a complete weirdo. I’ve linked the thread.

I feel so bad for the person and they have a right to not accept Addys apology. She pisses me off by always making “apologies” about her and how it’s affecting her and how ppl are spreading false info about her which is ironic coming from her. Idc if u like her or not but we can all agree that she is like this and the thread proves it. I also saw a video in the thread of her using mental health as an excuse as to why she is like that which is weirdo behaviour. She needs to really stay in her lane and stop acting like she knows every fucking things both Japan and Japanese culture. It’s annoying af how it’s her whole personality at this point. You can like Japan and Japanese culture etc but at least be educated about it.

I hate when she corners Asian aesthetics in to being kawaii and oh everything is kawaii ect it’s annoying. And for someone apart of the menhera community she can’t even pronounce the word properly because apparently the “a” is hard to say when ur British which is complete bs cuz I’m British and I can say it completely fine.

And she needs to take that wack ass makeup off and practise cuz how are h wearing that shit and then wearing a Jirai set up. Don’t fucking embarrass yourself. Get a grip.

The girl wrote a lot on twt and ppl are digging up a lot of stuff about addy and it’s very entertaining to see. She’s just using the same excuse and rehearsed apology over and over. And asking for “proof” like are u actually ok girl.

Sound off below with your through on the thread.

[jenzeeboo]

Hiii- so I’m coming over to your ask box cuz I drafted a whole long ass answer to your ask about “sitting next to (fav om character) and reaching over his lap to grab something, ass on full display.” Cuz that sounds like sm fun!!- 🤭 but my draft is just gone?? Idk what happened, if I deleted it instead of saving it or tumblr just randomly ate it 🥲 Lucifer, Levi, Satan, Mammon and Diavolo all gone 😭 sorry I’m being a bit dramatic jskjsks

Anyways I re-wrote the main one about Diavolo he’s been rotting my brain again-

Like say you’re sitting next to Diavolo maybe having a movie night together!!!- some old Disney or whatever you like playing on the TV and your DDD goes off. It’s not a big deal you just ignore it the first time, after all it’s on the little table on the other side of Dia and you reallyyyy don’t want to move.

A few more texts chime in and you huff, mumbling ‘Sorry, just let me get that.’ and leaning forward and across Diavolo’s lap~

Diavolo leans back automatically, making more room for you to stretch across his lap and is immediately rewarded, when your skirt rides up and he gets a full view of your ass. ‘n you just so happen to be wearing cute red underwear too~

Now there are two ways I could see it going after that 🤭

Either Diavolo can’t stop himself and slaps your ass, not too hard it’s more a playful kind of slap. When his hand lands on your ass he gives it a good squeeze, keeping you pinned in his lap and telling you just how lovely your ass looks ‘n feels~ ofc that’s gonna go further too-

Ooor he lets you get your DDD and sit back down, like nothing happened. You can answer your texts (or tell whoever’s texting you to fuck off for a bit) and after awhile Diavolo’s hand reaches over to your thigh. Running his fingers up and down the exposed skin, getting closer and closer to your barely covered slit….just tasing you until the movie is over and then acting like nothing happened.

this is a lot more rambling then the first draft but oh well rn I’m still pissed at tumblr.

But I love you sm 💋 <333 ‘n thanks for sending me such an amazing idea sweets <3

HEHEHHAHAHAH❤️ I LOVE YOU TOO ROOO~

[mangosrar]

you’re not a house, but i call you home.

just a lil something i wrote a while ago. y’all already know who it’s about ❤️‍🩹(i’m not tagging her cuz i am not no little bitch. this hoe annoying i hate her!!!)

having a best friend who you grew up with and have known since you were toddlers is like having an optional sibling. at any given moment the relationship that you spent years building and moulding into something beautiful could end. you’re not a house but i call you home. we’re inseparable but we argue all the time. we share each others clothes and we have a key to each others houses. i don’t know when i stop and you start. there’s no way you’re wearing the same perfume as me but here’s my kidney if you ever need it. you know exactly how to piss me off because you’re the only one who understands me. we can go hours just being together but not saying a word but i haven’t seen you in 2 days and i have so much to tell you. you’re just an extension of me. there’s never one without the other. you’re dad calls me adoptive daughter and my mom always saves you a chair because she knows you’re coming. if you die first promise to haunt me for the rest of my life. we haven’t lived in the same house but you know when i’m not ok when i don’t. to have a best friend is to know that you have someone to laugh with even when the world feels like it’s falling apart. you and i know each other in our bones. to have a best friend is to argue but still bring me a bottle of water before bed, as a way of apologising for all the times we’ve bitterly fought. friendships like these outlive marriages, resurface after quarrels that would sink any other relationship. the universe fought for our souls to be together, some things are too strong and strange to be coincidences. it’s weird how many stories i’ve told with you disguised in them. you are just always there. thankyou for that

@christinarowie332

[jungwondazed]

all of ur writing is so good BUT!!! if i had to pick one of my favs it’s prob be the one u wrote about reader loving jw’s moles. as much as i love all the rough possessive smut works smth abt like soft sex just does smth to me istg. prolly just bc i see won as such a cute and loving person so him being all soft and like just loving everything about you, and then you just doing the same back to him just admiring everything abt me makes me so ☹️☹️ also ig cuz i literally want to kiss him everywhere and tell him how much i love everything about him so it’s just like me frl also IM @heewonenthusiast THIS IS MY MAIN BLOG (i’m not very active on here) BUT U CANT SEND ASKS FROM SIDE BLOGS AND IT PISSES ME OFF okay bye💗

HI MY LOVE <3

okay i am so glad you appreciate my soft jungwon works because i also love gentle wonnie! he is so loving and would totally care about his partner during sex.

i can absolutely write more soft jungwon pieces because honestly when i fantasize about him my brain usually visualizes the kind caring side of him, i think the kinky rough side comes out more when he's frustrated as a leader or whatever would provoke that.

we love our jungwon who would nurture his girl and pay so much attention to her needs. also as a jungwon stan i admire everything about him so writing about him in great detail is something i love to do <3

[ironwoodprotectionsquad]

Your kind fascinate me with your brand of radicalization.

...

That's not a compliment BTW.

Are you seriously calling me “radicalized” for pointing out ableism?? Is this really the bill you’re going to die on? You’re cool with ableism? You think stopping disabled people of their humanity because they’re disabled is cool? Because from this ask that is all I can think honestly cuz that is the most recent post I made and this ask popped up not long after that.

I’m seriously concerned about someone intentionally going into a tag they know will piss them off and then harassing someone for their opinion about a cartoon and declaring they’ve been “radicalized” for not liking people being ableist. It’s honestly kind of pathetic. And you know what? The way you wrote this ask reminds me of an anon I blocked ages ago who had a very similar writing style so their is also a high likely hood you’re block evading on top of everything else.

Also how the ever-loving fuck is their a “brand” of radicalization. Your ask is ridiculous, makes no sense, and clearly was only made because you intentionally went out of your way to go into a tag you knew you hated solely to harass people for daring to have opinions you disagree with. Go outside and touch some grass. You clearly need it.

[crab-people-overlord]

Intro 🧡

guess I might as well do an intro

diagnosed adhd software engineer here (🩷💜💙 bruh why tf is there no bi emoji), coming to you from the Rocky Mountains (where rich people's empty ski homes are literally everywhere and driving up costs….. pls send help)

writing stuff + ao3 link

working on a canon-adjacent story about the main kids. it’s a short story so will be done soon :) and I hope to focus on more short stories in the future.

also doing a south park/good place crossover because why not

wrote this thing called "the cultish conundrum" which... exists... (planning to rewrite it someday when i git gud™️) (wrote this when I knew NOTHING of fandom so I did try to be canon-compliant but knew nothing of creative writing when I first started, so I hope to revisit to rewrite it to be actually… good one day lol)

Also if you’re an ao3 writer of your own and want me to kudos/comment just lmk!! I know this isn’t an excuse but my adhd makes it so bad for me to read others works but if I’m instructed to I genuinely love it and want to support y’all as from what I’ve seen, there’s SO many talented SP writers out there that I genuinely want to support so badly but am literally so bad at committing when there’s so many choices lmao

quick stats:

mid 20s and fresh out of college

chronic procrastinator turned aspiring hobbiest writer who still has a lot to learn (bear w me you guys; I studied computer science in college and just BS’d my my way thru the required English courses 😭)

ex-mormon who served a mission (emphasis on the ‘ex’- 🫡 🥲 god the stories I have lmfao) also I surprisingly still haven’t watched the BOM musical despite this?? tho I know the soundtrack by heart lol

works in tech and works from home

builds legos and is an incredibly nerdy gamer when not crying over learning how to write (most of my nights are spent either gaming w friends via discord or building legos or both)

I love all the main 5 equally and think they all have strengths and weaknesses that are often over generalized in fandom (tho view Eric specifically from a well written/complex antagonists lens and not as an apologist. I think he’s a racist and sexist sob with occasional good traits that don’t otherwise eliminate the overall bad he does. I think he’s literally meant to be the main antagonist, just as Matt and Trey intend him to be.

Though the other main four (butters, Kyle, Stan, and Kenny)- I will always be their lawyer and apologist lmao. I can’t stand when people view a couple isolated episodes for any of those four to demonize them (they literally all have an equal screen time of shitty behavior so it pisses me tf off when some focus on one over the other as evidence of being ‘worse’. I genuinely think they’re all equal from a moral lens; just in different strengths and ways. Feel free to ask for more details cuz I’ve got lots of opinions on this lmao) Butters, Stan, Kyle, and Kenny all try their best and I’ll accept no lasting slander on any of them 🥹 (tho of course will always accept nuanced views of them cuz none of them are close to perfect (this is what makes them realistic 😭- and love writing them w their flaws and all :)

so yeah!! south park has basically been my comfort show/emotional support media for as long as i can remember. like it's literally been keeping me sane through… everything

currently vibing in the fandom space (though still learning all the rules so pls be patient w me 🥺 I am NOT new to South Park, but am new to fandom, so… im genuinely open to any feedback. at the end of the day I don’t want any drama and just want to vibe w you all in the SP fandom). if i mess up tags or anything else or whatever just let me know!! I genuinely do want to be respectful but am brand fucking new to the fandom space/etiquette and it’s a little overwhelming tbh lmao. But I’m so down to learn.

absolutely down to chat about anything!! just use my ask box or dm if you're 18+ (minors welcome to interact via reblogs/public comments/ask section, just please no dm!). i promise i'm super chill and literally just here to vibe with other cool humans who don't tolerate any transphobic/racist/etc behavior.

SP style is honestly my OTP and what even compelled me to look into the fandom space in general tbh (and is kinda funny because most of my life I’ve just viewed them as canonically super best friends lmao). Even with style being my OTP, I love their deep friendship first and foremost even before any romantic ship. Don’t hesitate to reach out with one-shot requests in the ask-box tho! I’m happy to help to work on anything, really- even if style is platonic. I really vibe w Craig, for example.