#i would rather not

[i-am-trans-gwender]

"Google is free"

True but I'd rather get an answer from a person with emotions then a website that turns a 30 word answer into an entire article while trying to stay as neutral as possible.

[ioannemos]

suddenly remembered a dream i had last night where i was a robot or something who got separated from the group i was supposed to be with. it was a group of mostly kids and the building we were supposed to be touring was (as per usual) really weird and i was stuck in this long corridor just inside the door and couldn't find the group or anyone in charge to lead me where i needed to be

time passed. i got frustrated going between these two halls. i was sure the group must have passed me but i didn't know how. and then part of the building blew up

people started just streaming out of the building, mostly groups with kids, and i started directing them to the exits. i kept going deeper into the building, tho, bc i was trying to find my group. i went deeper and deeper, convincing people to leave, listening for voices, and then i heard them on the other side of a door. i pounded on it, telling the teacher or leader of the group to open the door and leave

she opened it for like. ten seconds to tell me that they were all going to die anyway: they'd been directly contaminated by some kind of radioactive substance. one of her hands was covered in green goo that was definitely glowing. she told me to abandon them and then closed the door

i freaked out. i was supposed to be taking care of them! the reason i'd lost track of them in the first place was bc i'd gone ahead to make sure it was safe! if i'd actually been a robot i could've lifted beams and dragged them out, but i was back to the improv theater reading of the situation bc i couldn't actually do anything

the last thing i remember about the dream was running frantically back out of the building and trying to find someone else who could help them. i don't think i found anyone

[staygaybaby]

thinking “I want to go home” while sitting in the living room of your house <<<<<< literally anything else

[johnbly]

cork board? no no no. cork boat.

[munsonsduchess]

People out here praising my relationship bc I told Mr Duchess to stay at home tomorrow since he’s not feeling well. I just don’t want the lurgy.

I absolutely do not want to be sick. No thanks.

He can keep that to himself.

[iamnotmereally]

Hi idk what's with the asks, but i don't want to make out with my bestfriend

[boredbutalive]

Imagine being so entirely right about me, even when you know full well that imma probably not listen

I always am about to go to sleep at a beautiful 11pm and then something happens to me

[inbabylontheywept]

so once me and my wife were watching a documentary where a snake ate like a million eggs. that snake just went to fucking town on eggs. and the snake made the eggs look so good that i kept thinking about it, and thinking about it, and thinking about it, and eventually it was 11pm and i ran out of willpower and decided to eat one (1) singular raw egg just to prove to myself that the snake was surely a liar.

the snake was not a liar. texture is like, super important to me and raw eggs are very Texture so i had another one, and then another one, and then another one, and eventually i ran out of eggs.

i had like, fifteen raw eggs.

i didnt really know how to explain this momentary madness to my wife, so my Plan was to put all the eggshells into a grocey bag, and then throw that grocery bag in the dumpster, and if she never noticed that would be Excellent and if she noticed immediately i could lie and say that the eggs went bad.

except i cant lie very good, and of course with murphys law being such, i got salmonella.

so i threw up a lot and my wife asked me what poisoned me so and i tried very hard to dodge the question but i was oozing shame like oil from a room temperature cheese and eventaully i gave in and told her everything and to her enormous credit she was more flabbergasted than actually upset. she did make me promise to not eat any more raw eggs, which i have stuck to, and she gives me weird looks during nature documentaries now as if desire was the only thing keeping me from eating thousands of pounds of krill anyway i made a joke earlier about being able to eat my age in eggs and my sister in law in law made a drawing to comemorate the moment and also because it was my birthday. she's excellent. thank you 10000000% @cintailed. you should all visit her page and admire her work.

[stuckinapril]

I could get over anything as long as I have something new to be obsessed with

[maykr]

🤨

[miagkoi]

born to be a mediocre gamer forced to participate in society

[kodasea]

Son of Gondor

[brionysea]

i do like my little 2-4 chapter wips, i'm not gonna lie

[hinamie]

ṇ̵̛̱͌̅̃͛̔o̴̮̓̀͂́̃_̴̛̲́s̷͈̋̈́̄̋͠ị̶͔̗̐͐̐̒̕g̵̛̱̘̣̑͂ņ̴̰͔̘͇̏̒̓̇͠͝a̸̜̥̩̭͋̌ḷ̶͔̖͗͋͛͛̃͆

[cowardlycowboys]

girl who constantly feels like they're in trouble and did something wrong

[ironinkpen]

there's something so poetic about kipperlilly copperkettle—who hated one of her classmates for daring to be better than her and having a dead dad, who refused to improve herself and instead chose to be bitter and entitled, who was so obsessed with being Special and Important like she felt she deserved that she willingly worked with a rage god, betrayed her party, and killed her friend—getting killed by fucking. Hold Person. her fancy optimal build IMMEDIATELY folding in the face of riz's cleverness and experience and applied knowledge. she spends years fixated solely on racking up EXP and getting the Best Abilities, and then when she dies, she's killed not in glorious combat but by a clever, practical application of a 2nd level spell that she NEVER would have ever thought of using because she has no creativity or adventurers' spirit, cast by the same classmate she always hated with a watch his dead dad gave him.