#i would love to have more options than just. trauma porn.

[johndonneswife]

not a sad ‘woe is me’ post so don’t send me weird messages but: the thing abt cycling through every ED possible and being bulimic for like 10 yrs & making yourself vomit up to 10x times per day on ur worst days is that your teeth and gums will eventually give out on you (bc it doesn’t make a difference if you’ve been good & it doesn’t matter how well you’ve taken care of your teeth for the last x years) and u will be 30 years old crying to your very sweet and kind dentist when she tells you about the 1 million things that are wrong with ur teeth

[chrysalis-the-butterfly]

What I Mean When I Say, "I Ship Huskerdust"

When I say, "I ship Huskerdust," I don't mean that I think it would be a perfect example of a healthy relationship. Because it wouldn't be.

They've both got issues that they would need to work through if they wanted their relationship to succeed.

On Angel's side, there's the fact that his prior interactions with Husk basically consisted of him flirting with Husk, and Husk making it clear that he wasn't interested, and Angel ignoring that and doing it again. That's harassment.

Yes, Angel stops doing it after Episode 4, but he never explicitly apologises for it. That was a missed opportunity, in my opinion. It was a change for the show to say loudly and clearly, "Hey, trauma sucks, we get that, but it's not an excuse to treat people badly yourself. You grow by owning up to your mistakes and trying to be better than the person who hurt you."

Speaking of trauma...

Angel is being abused by Valentino and exploited in the porn industry. That's not a personal failing. It's not Angel's fault. But it has affected him deeply, and it's something that he and Husk would need to work through.

It's not going to be all sunshine and rainbows. Angel will cry, Angel will get angry, Angel will lash out. He will behave inappropriately, and he will keep being hypersexual because he knows how to do it and sometimes it feels like the safest option. And he will have no idea how to just rest with a loved one and trust them. So Husk will need to be the bigger person and take all the ups and downs and keep loving Angel through the dark days.

But I don't know if Husk has what it takes to do that.

That leads me nicely onto the issues on Husk's side. For starters, there's his judgemental attitude. He's a gambler, and therefore believes he can read people and know everything about them. Angel's "It's not an act!" outburst shakes Husk and makes him realise that he didn't really know what was going on.

But even after that, Husk is still judging Angel. It happens in Episode 6, when Angel is offered drugs by Cherri Bomb and Husk says, "Look, you wanna fuck up all your progress, be my guest. I just ... I just thought you were better than that."

Addicts can relapse if they go back to their old environments and old relationships. It happens. And it's probably not a good idea to be so condemnatory about it.

Can you imagine what Husk's reaction would be if Angel really did relapse? Would Angel feel safe opening up to Husk again if he knew how badly Husk could take it?

Sometimes, it seems as though Husk puts Angel on a pedestal. In Episode 8, when he tells Angel, "I guess you have changed," Angel doesn't look convinced, instead changing the subject. Husk sees Angel as better than Angel thinks he is.

And that goes hand-in-hand with when he was judging Angel more harshly in earlier episodes. Husk applies higher standards to Angel.

I think part of the reason why Husk is so hard on Angel is because Husk sees something in Angel that he doesn't see in himself - youth and potential. Husk has made it clear that he isn't trying to get into Heaven. He probably doesn't think he deserves it. That's why he told Angel not to look for answers to problems at the bottom of a bottle, but continued to drink himself.

My theory is that Husk is working on Angel because he finds it easier than working on himself.

It's much easier to judge and boss around others than to acknowledge and rectify your own flaws. To borrow a metaphor from Jesus Christ himself, Husk is trying to take specks of sawdust out of Angel's eye while he's still got plenty of planks in his own eye.

One of those planks being his complicity in the Overlord system.

Yes, I should probably mention that Husk used to be an Overlord. He used to participate in the very system that is now trapping and torturing Angel.

And he gambled with the souls that he owned! He put their afterlives at stake! Can you imagine being owned by Husk, thinking you knew where you stood, and then waking up one day to be told that you were now owned by someone else? Potentially someone as bad as Valentino?

(Now, I don't think Husk ever actually played a game with Valentino, given that he can't seem to remember Val's name in Episode 6, but still, the implications are horrifying.)

Angel didn't have too big a reaction when Husk opened up about his past. But that's probably because he was still reeling a bit from his own outburst. Once it had sunk in, how did he feel?

How can Angel feel safe and loved around someone who used to own souls and gamble with them carelessly? Someone who apparently still has his Overlord powers? Someone who could turn into yet another Valentino in the wrong circumstances?

How can a romance work?

Can a romance work?

Despite all of that?!

No, when I say, "I ship Huskerdust," I don't mean, "I think they're fluffy and adorable and 100% unproblematic." I mean, "Huskerdust contains interesting dynamics that are fun to explore." There's something about their interactions that I enjoy.

And Huskerdust could be a good way for the cartoon to dive into its themes of redemption and second changes.

Husk could change Angel for the better. We can see that, after Episode 4, Angel is willing to be more honest about what he's going through. He actually tells Niffty about the gruelling 16-hour shift Valentino put him through, instead of trying to pretend he's been all right.

If they became an official couple, Husk could show Angel what it's like to have someone genuinely care for him and his wellbeing, not just use him for money-making or self-gratification. Since Husk isn't interested in Angel's hypersexual porn star persona, it would be a chance for Angel to take the time to figure out who he (Anthony?) really is.

Angel could change Husk for the better, too. Other Tumblr bloggers have pointed out that Husk seemed to be drinking a little less after Episode 4. Perhaps watching Angel attempting self-improvement encouraged Husk to give it a go as well, albeit in a more low-key way.

And if Husk was the one who got Angel out of his contract with Valentino, that would be a great culmination of his character arc. It would be his own personal redemption for participating in the cruel Overlord system, because he'd be freeing someone from an Overlord's control. He'd be correcting his past mistakes. I for one would love to see that in a future season.

That is what I mean when I say "I ship Huskerdust."

TL;DR Angel and Husk are not perfect people, not by a long shot - but they could be perfect for each other.

[piratecaptainscaptainpirates]

The thing is, yeah, there's more queer media now than ever before. But if OFMD were to stay canceled, it would leave a real hole. I've never seen a show quite like it before, so it does annoy me to see people out here responding to fans upset about the cancelation with "there are other gay shows."

OFMD hits a wonderful blend of having very important things to say about masculinity and the things we're taught about being a man, and it has this very particular style where it loves to showcase people that society often deems lesser, not just queer people but people of color, and it consistently presents these characters as competent and desireable, and it never, ever punches down. I love being able to sit down to watch this show and know 100% that if a character starts being a racist asshole or if they start acting homophobic, the narrative is going to punish them for it. I love knowing that the second someone says something racist, they're a dead man walking.

And, yeah, there are other shows that feature queer characters, but I've still never seen one do it like OFMD. I'm old enough to be fucking sick of my only queer media options being teenage coming-out stories and trauma porn. That stuff is fine if it's what you want, I just wanted something else for a change! And I love how in OFMD queer is the default in a way that is thoughtful and joyful, I love how it gives us queer stories that don't just focus on the same tired coming-out narrative.

It's such a kind show. It gives me a lot of hope, because things are kinda fucking terrible in the world right now, and OFMD takes you by the hand and it tells you that it's never too late to start working towards a life you love and a more authentic version of yourself, and at the end of the day you can at least help your community and the people you love. OFMD is a thoughtfully-written show that treats its audience with a lot of respect. If we do lose it, I think that'll be a terrible loss.

[yandere-daydreams]

Daytrip Illumi my beloved... and poor Darling. You capture how unnerving and unsettling he should be so well!

Illumi should be Strange and Uncanny even at his mildest(? not sure if an Illumi in love could be 'mild', but idk if it could be called volatile either. Darling was right, you can't ever tell with him); man was cosplaying Pinhead for a week. He could talk the whole time but just literally rattled at people. And poor Ghost, my stomach just dropped because everything so far was downright too tame and too thoughtful for a Yandere.

Aside from the porn, I was waiting for that drop. Darling really can't have nice things, can't she? Or rather, she can't have anything he's not able to take. Whether a Darling is defiant (Obedience Training, Ingress) or submissive (Daytrip) he's always going to pile on the trauma.

But the moment he started mouthing and groping at her in the car, I knew he was out of patience. Everything else that day was window dressing and foreplay, and the bit where she picks a cute, frilly, puff-sleeved dress really sold the toy and doll comparison later, she was so right at the observation that Illumi took her as a ballerina for his music box. In the end, the daytrip really wasn't for her to enjoy: he ripped up her dream dress, dashed her hope that her cat was doing well without her, and didn't get to eat anything at the picnic aside from the morsel he gave her. Girl couldn't even enjoy the scenery cause he blocked it off with himself. The end was so despondent in comparison to the beginning where she resolves to take any out that presents itself, falling asleep and giving into the dark (Illumi) swallowing her.

And meanwhile, Illumi's just had an epiphany on why his parents kept having kids even after the designated heir Killua. And also patting himself on the back cause he checked off all the boxes on his 'perfect romantic date to-do list', and gotten the *ideal* ending of having finally lost his v-card. 10/10, Great Day. Would do again sometime (but not too soon).

The juxtapostion between her opinion of how the daytrip went and his opinion of how it went must be... something. I almost don't want to know, and I don't know how to properly describe what this made me feel, but it's visceral.

i love it when you people treat my silly little fics like they need to be studied under a microscope,,,, i will be living on this ask for weeks thank you anon <3

illumi just makes me,,, yeah. i feel like there's so little you can do to actually fight against him (running's not an option when he has you under surveillance 24/7, fighting a seasoned hitman won't end well, etc.), but good behavior only makes him more likely to proceed with the awful things he would've done anyway, had you spent every minute from your inevitably kidnapping kicking, screaming, and cursing his name. he's got a running checklist of uncomfortable positions he'd like to see you in, and it's less a question of when you'll be ready for it and more what he'll have to do to make you compliant enough to be, if not a willing participant, than a docile one. i think he does care about your feelings and you loving him back, but your priorities are so drastically different that you two are never actually going to end up on the same page. in his mind, he's done his research (i.e. played roughly a hundred hours of the most popular dating sims he could get his hands on), been a good partner, and taken very good care of his beloved doll/pet/captive. in yours, you've been violated and abused by the man who both kidnapped you and admitted to killing your cat without blinking, and there's very little reconciliation from there.

[doyou000me]

Fic Author Self Rec

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to other writers. Spread the self-love~ 🫶🏻

@dropthedemiurge tagged me in this, and since I do love me a fun tag game, I have no reason to refuse! I did purge my ao3 recently so I don't have a whole lot of options, but here we go~!

Luca Knows [Vincenzo, LucaxVincenzo, fic series] I am cheating right out the gate, because this is not a fic but a series of oneshots that I've written for the kdrama Vincenzo, and I love every single one of the six installments! This series starts out Mature, then dives into dead dove and veers into religious trauma - all with a hearty serving of horniness and smut! "It's an interesting exploration of what kind of show Vincenzo might have been if it had leaned in a grittier, bloodier direction." is one of my all time favourite comments that I am proud of getting, especially considering they torture people in canon. I wholly expect I'll eventually write more for this series - I have notes for at least 2 more oneshots!

The Look [My Personal Weatherman, MizukixYok, oneshot] This came about thanks to the lovely @candidamay! A certain picture that I came across thanks to her was very inspiring, and then I had a great time brainstorming a pairing that would fit the dynamic of the picture - and we settled on Mizuki and Yoh as the perfect couple with just the right combination of power dynamics, horniness and kink. It's sweet, unapologetic smut served with feels and a pinch of food porn. (The picture is in the fanfic on ao3. Just click the title to satisfy your curiosity, my fellow heathen.)

Moth to Flame [Kinnporsche, Gen, KinnxPorsche, oneshot] When inspiration hits, it hits hard. This time the idea of pyromanic Porsche hit me over the head and left me no choice but to pour this oneshot out onto the digital paper. Something about a young Porsche entranced by the heat of a bright flame really speaks to me - and then the idea of that same Porsche in a tiny restaurant kitchen spoke to me some more, and it has since become the first part of a series of fics. So far there's only two of them, but as always I have ideas.

Impulse Control [Kinnporsche, KinnxPorsche, oneshot] Smut! This is one of those that I started writing, forgot about - and then completed 2 years later. My story outline was intro/smut/smut/smut/smut/outro (with smut) which should tell you all you need to know about it! Porsche is the delightful little shit that we all love, and Kinn tries his very best to keep his new bodyguard in line. It works about as well as one can expect.

Held [The Sign, PhayaxTharn, TharnxPhaya, multichapter] The Sign was a wild ride and it was great fun sharing that ride with everyone! Writing as each episode came out and using the fic to delve deeper into the characters' thoughts and motivations made me appreciate the series more than I would have by just watching it, and I also had the opportunity to try a few new, fun writing tricks along the way. Be warned: chapter 11 is some of the most efficient writing I have ever written.

Now I'd like to hear which of your fics are your favourites @7nessasaryevils, @xagan, @luckydragon10

[scarefox]

Some BL babies under the Playboyy trailers: "But can the actors ever face their parents again?" and "BL is doing too much now"

I don't even know where to begin with this. Like literally porn actors and / A(dult)V(ideo) idols exist and they still have good relationships with their parents and friends. Some parents are totally fine with their GROWNUP kids to go into the adult industry. SOME (grownup!) "kids" may not even care for their parents opinion. Gown up people should not have to ask their parents for permission to act in certain media. Sex scenes acting and even literal (modern) porn and sex work gets treated professionally within their industries. So why can't the rest of the world treat it rather with respect?

And the Playboyy actors are not even porn actors (I think. but wouldn't matter if they were) but 'normal' actors who just play pretend sex scenes. Literally most of hollywood and Cos actors have sex scenes that are on the same level of graphicness as they are in Playboyy (like Game of Thrones????). They still all show their faces in public and infront of their family.

Some people are simply not that prude and shy. It's that easy 🤷‍♂️

And some parents may be totally fine with the stuff their kids do, but simply don't watch it or skip it if it's too awkward. I think that's more common actually.

ALSO it annoys (and secondhand embarrasses) me so much that so many BL babies act like Playboyy is the first and only explicit gay themed drama ever existing on this planet. Not even in the box of the BL genre are they the first (maybe only for the thai corner... but even there it is not much more explicit than KinnPorsche and Love in the Air so far, it's just more scenes all together due to the plot setting). But meanwhile the whole LGBTq film industry all around the world is that explicit too. Some more, some less. The ones that are tame are made for a rather general audiences, younger audiences or to appeal to cis-straight audiences even. But a lot of LGBTq stuff is explicit like that. So that's not new?

The LGBTq movies and series I have seen in all my life are wild. Also not always wholesome, nor 'perfect representation' either (a lot of gay movies are kink fantasies or trauma themed, some of them are so much darker than any 'toxic' BL but yea... ). So idk what this annoying discourse around BL and good representation is supposed to be in that context. That ALWAYS sounds to me like "but we have to make this queer content in a way that the homophobes and queerphobes can watch it by accident without finding us weird and disgusting"...

And regarding Playboyy I don't even know if that's supposed to be BL aka if it's supposed to please the general BL audiences or if it's not rather purely from and for LGBTq folks (+allies) in and outside of the BL genre bubble. But as I said before already, the genre borders are melting at some projects anyways to the point that it's hard to find the differentiating factors (for BL I would say the only fixed point is that it has the romance (romantic fantasies) genre at it's core, anything else is optional). I feel like a lot of people assume that BL has to be for teenager's. Meanwhile not even the origins (manga) and the source material (usually web comics and novels) of today are all for teens. That genre is diverse and for ALL audiences of ALL ages. And it's GOOD that more parts of the audiences can get their own niche content now! Like I for example am originally not that much into sappy romance and marriage plots but I still watch it since it's with characters I can identify with more than the heteronormative & gendernormative stuff from the west (I also learned a thing or two maybe, like the fact that I may like sappy romance plots sometimes after all).

Anyways, Rule of thumb for anything in general: If you don't like it, then it is not made for you. So stop complaining about stuff that is for others* 🤷‍♂️

(*unless it's proven to be harmful or disrespectful, as in the tone of the whole story, not the action of characters that are supposed to be dumb sometimes.)

[spicylavender]

ok you know what, I want to be mean today. Time to list my negative Echo opinions from least to most controversial, I think that'll be funny

Echo project games track record with female character writing blows, and they mostly don't have the same excuse other fvns have of being mostly porn for gay guys, but that has gotten progressively better with each successive game (mostly)

Echo never handled Jenna's actually bad traits well and that's why fan reaction to her ends up so muddled. Her getting in universe pushback for her reaction to the Leo and micha situation and Flynn's read on her in the prologue are nothing compared to actually awful things she gets away with like the pranks involving Chase's arachnophobia

Brian is the least interesting antagonistic force in the first game, and his bump to main antagonist in arches didn't change this at all (though this is entirely a preference thing, torture porn isn't my preferred brand of horror)

the modern TSR au polycule does not seem built to last at all, and I would see a big split in the future for them if they weren't an indulgent fictional parody we get for dated millennial jokes. Still love em to death but it's carried hard by my own delusions.

Arches is, aside from its epilogue, the weakest of the echo trilogy and that's going to end up being entirely because of how early it was released imo. It would have gone extremely hard as the big finale to the series but instead we've still got two years of TSR updates lol

Cliff starts the story engaging with Samuel in the most exploitative way of all the main love interests, to the point where I think he's more comparable to James than he is the other route options, and I don't even think that's a far fetche'd read seeing as how his route is the one that literally contains the only illustrated James encounter (as of the last build I've read). Him being immediately indulged in his sexual tourism would be a bad outcome in any story other than a romance game

Will is a bad dad, bar none. Being closeted doesn't absolve him of the responsibility he took on and him finding happiness after leaving with a hunky puma guy is nice but he deserves any reckoning coming his way in his own route. Nothing major here, just hoping that God takes all of Andy and Hattie's pain, triples it, and gives it too my favorite fruity detective

Flarl is a boring ship and it's the rare occasion where I feel bad for Carl. After Flynn bounces off of Leo, chase, his delusions of a potentially grown Sydney and any random guy he could have met at The Smoke Room, carl ends up feeling like a lay of last resort

Related to point 7, Carls the worst member of the main friend group. Relatable stoner artist with depression yeah yeah whatever, I just have nothing to latch onto with the nepo baby. Even when Jenna is maybe hummed up? In his route and written as the bitchy harpy stereotype I mostly still agree with her.

Cameron and Devon does not seem like a relationship that would have lasted long without the crucible of echo trauma bonding them. Dev denying cam's mental illness in the prologue is also beyond the pale and I don't see how people moved on from that so quickly

people are extremely selective in which characters actions they excuse with the hum and possession and who they condemn immediately despite signs of reduced autonomy. Characters thoughts and actions not allowed to be their own is a major theme in the first game that I think echo handles pretty interestingly but more often then not the fandom just uses it as a cudgel in dumb character wars

The quality of writing and routes in echo ended up being very dependent on a single key factor I don't necessarily want to name because even I think it might be a little mean to say but you can probably guess it if you know even just a tiny bit of the developmental history of the game. I think this factor also applies to all of the games and the quality of their writing ends up dependent on the presence or lack thereof this particular factor.

This should be finished off with me admitting that this is just me giving cinema sins and I love all these games, just kinda wanted to write out a master post of thoughts I've had over the last year and a half. Also wouldn't hurt if this generated any sort of funny arguments in my mentions lol, i also do just enjoy being petty and arguing with people🤷

[foxxxtransformer123]

Alastor headcanons that nobody asked for, but I'm putting them out here anyway.

I have a lot of thoughts about this man, so this will be broken into multiple parts.

This one will be on relationships

With all of that out of the way, onto the fun part:

1. It is very, very hard to earn his trust and break through all of his walls and actually get respected as an almost equal. There's really only been 2 people in his long existence to get to this point: Rosie and Vox. Vox bungled it very badly.

Nifty fits into this category only a bit because she's more along the lines of his gremlin daughter.

If you manage to get to the point of friend with him, well, you've managed something incredible, and your prize is an extremely loyal cryptid who would both kill and die for you in and honestly would be more like the cat you found behind the dumpster who has behavioral issues and only tolerates your existence and no one else's than a friend. (The cat ends up being an eldritch monstrosity that will eat the neighborhood bully for you).

FRIENDSHIP FOR HIM IS ALL OR NOTHING

Good job Vox, you sure fucked up. (Honestly, I think both of them had a part to play in the end of that relationship, I will go more in-depth later on my theories of what happened there).

2. Alastor hates touch unless he initiates it. That is Canon. But, his friends like Rosie can freely touch him. If he isn't feeling up to touch on a particular day, he will compromise by simply being close but not touching. Some days, he is feeling really cuddly, but that's rare.

He will often be seen walking around town with Rosie or, in the past, Vox, usually arm in arm or hand in hand. People often mistake them as a couple because of their closeness and familiarity.

Cheek kisses are a love language for him, mainly because of Rosie.

3. The ultimate displays of trust from the Radio Demon are him doing normal people things around you like: taking off his shoes or coat, sleeping, and taking a shower while you're in the building.

Honestly, just getting him to tolerate your existence is a victory.

4. He does kind of view Charlie like a daughter, but he's actively trying to beat that feeling into submission with a broom (and losing). He very much has the parental instincts (which he hates) and would be the kind of person to randomly adopt your unattended child if he didn't just barely tolerate other people. He has to actively beat those feelings back.

Nifty is the exception.

5. A friendship with him would feel kind of like a romantic relationship. He's over at their place visiting a lot of the time to the point of cooking and doing chores or having Nifty do chores. He'll often spend days or weeks living at his friends' places. He'll leave for errands and work and such, but he'll be back by the end of the day and will cook dinner and do the dishes. He often sleeps in the same bed as his friends (I will get into that more in a later post).

As mentioned before: friendship is an all or nothing sort of thing for him. He will go all in on his favorite people.

Alright, now we have the sex and romance part:

He is canonicaly AroAce. We don't have confirmation on were on the spectrum he is, so here are my thoughts:

He isn't interested in romance in the slightest. His close friendships are all he's interested in. He will fake a romantic relationship if it results in something he wants.

He has a very complicated relationship with sex. He has a lot of trauma surrounding it (which he tries to ignore). He has little to no interest in sex with another person unless it will gain him something, and even then, he will exhaust all other options or simply decide that whatever it is isn't worth it.

Ace people can have a wide range in their libido. For me, it's rather low usually, but other people have a wide range from normal to very low.

I think Alastor is probably on the lower end but not totally non-existent.

Porn is uncomfortable for him, and he never uses it. He also hasn't experimented with his preferences much.

I do think he might have had sex at least once or twice out of curiosity, but it's not all that it's cracked up to be, so he doesn't bother.

He actively supports sex workers and porn actors. It's just a job to him.

Despite being behind the times in pretty much everything, he has surprisingly modern views of gender and the like.

He hasn't ever gotten the hate for LGBTQ+ people even if he doesn't understand the new terms. He doesn't care about gender and shit.

Just dress how you want and don't bother him. Kiss whoever you want and don't bother him. That's about it.

That's all I have for now and I need to be at work in 5 hours so I'm going to bed.

[leslie-lyman]

Okay first of all I’m loving reading the responses to this question and I’m super flattered that you’d wanna hear my response!

I find smut hard to write. Even after 2.5 years of writing a fair amount it still does not come naturally to me, and trying to figure out how exactly to convey what’s going on (and even to figure out what I want to go on) takes me longer than writing anything else.

I also have no real process. And not just for smut, for any writing. I have ADHD and I’m sure if anyone had to sit and watch me in a google doc they would be driven completely fucking insane. I write everything out of order, oftentimes I’ll stop mid-sentence and start a completely new part of the fic because that is the order of how things come into my brain. Completing a fic for me is like making the world’s most batshit quilt; bits and pieces get sewn together here and there until finally everything’s attached and I’ve got a single finished thing on my hands.

As far as smut goes, how I come up with the scene just depends. I definitely always write things that I enjoy (and I don’t do requests because, again, ADHD and that’s just too much pressure), and you’ll notice certain things come up over and over in my smut - dominant man/submissive woman, dirty talk, breeding kink, porn with feelings and lots of character backstory, etc.

Sometimes the scenario comes first, and then I’ll figure out which Pedro boy it should be for. Like I knew wanted to write an A/B/O fic, and then ran through the Rolodex of options and played with a few ideas before settling on Max Phillips. With Focus, I wanted to write hypnokink and then decided Ezra would be the best/most interesting fit for that scenario.

Sometimes the pairing comes first and then I’ll see what sex scenes develop out of it. With Euclidean Geometry, yes I knew I wanted to write a polycule, but didn’t have any specific smut in mind at first. It was more about who would I want to put into this relationship, and what would that look like in terms of connection, growth, interpersonal dynamics, etc. I landed on Frankie x Jack x Pero 1. Because I hadn’t yet seen anyone do that particular combination, and 2. I wanted to explore what a relationship amongst three veterans - all from different parts of the military, with very different experiences, and all dealing with their own trauma - would look like. How would these men meet? How would they fall for each other? And yeah, obviously their story is gonna involve sex, but, and I know this is funny to say about a polycule fanfic, it was my secondary consideration.

The one other thing I’ll say about writing a polycule that I’ve seen other people mention too is that porn can be SO HELPFUL for providing ideas on positioning. 😂

My stories tend to be more story- and character-driven, lengthy ideas of which sex is one component, rather than just one-shots (which is why what I’ve posted is nowhere NEAR the sum total of what I’ve actually written and of all the ideas I have). A fic like my Congressman Marcus series hasn’t gotten to the smut yet; I started that fic to explore the full answer to the question “what if Marcus Pike successfully ran for Congress?” And again, sex will be just one component of that story and I don’t really have any idea of what it’ll look like at this point yet.

Then again, sometimes a single sex scene pops into my head and then I end up writing an entire fic around it, which is more-or-less what happened with the tickling scene in Chapter 7 of Stranger At My Gate. Don’t ask me where that scene came from because I have no idea. In these situations I do not control the horny; the horny controls me.

Does any of this actually answer your questions?? I hope this is elucidating!

Question for Fic Writers

So I'm curious about something. If you write smut, how do you come up with the scene/scenario?

For me it just sort of comes to me when I'm thinking about my characters. Like especially for my chaptered series, I'll be thinking about the characters and their progression and then a smut idea for them will just pop into my head like a movie scene. I rarely feel like I'm struggling to come up with a scene bc my brain just sort of fills in the blanks if that makes sense?

But I wanna know about other writers. Do you have a kink/trope you want to write and just fit it in wherever? Are you writing from irl experiences? Do you just have a specific type of smut you want and then write for it? Do you see something on Bellesa House and want to recreate it (LMAO)? Do you have people requesting a certain fantasy/kink/trope and write based off that?

Please share bc I'm super curious!

Sound off in the comments or reblog with extended commentary if you're a yapper like me.

full pressure tags (if I forgot anybody I'm sorry!):

@frannyzooey @ezrasbirdie @joelscruff @atticrissfinch @perotovar

@swiftispunk @kedsandtubesocks @chronically-ghosted @ghostofaboy @ghoulettesinspace

@toxicanonymity @umnitsa @quinnnfabrgay @bizarrelove-triangle @ozarkthedog

@agentmarcuspike @beardedjoel @magpiepills @noxturnalpascal @beelzebeth87

@not-a-unique-snowflake-blog @sp00kymulderr @luxurychristmaspudding @janaispunk @max--phillips

@covetyou @strang3lov3 @iamasaddie @iamskyereads @cavillscurls

@hier--soir @romanarose @goodwithcheese @neverwheremoonchild @netherfeildren

@beefrobeefcal @for-a-longlongtime @burntheedges @missredherring @qveerthe0ry

@grogusmum @prolix-yuy @demonsandbullets @leslie-lyman

[thedeespot]

SAFE, but wise?

I've been thinking about this post so much that I have probably gone blank a couple of times trying to think of the best come back in the game and I'm still blank. Now this would probably be the time I would simply browse through my many social media platforms and eventually get bored and then I would browse a bit deeper, log into sites that would find me pleasuring myself at the end of each video (don't side eye me on this, why you are judging me?) and after all of that, I go to sleep, with my temporary satisfaction. But you're married, you're probably thinking. Yes, I am but I've learnt that even in marriage, bad habits still creep up to fill up voids or even temporarily make us forget traumas that we have swept under the carpet and moved on from. Now believe me watching a couple of videos on porn sites is honestly the safest thing anyone can do because, in the moment, it seems harmless and "it's just videos" of people just screwing each other silly, until you turn to your partner and feel less sexually attracted to them because they are not the guy in the video pleasuring you. Until you even go as far as comparing sizes, then next thing you are comparing height and body type and every little thing that didn't matter to you, all of a sudden means so much more than it's supposed to.

I mean gents, you've seen the title "stretch me out" or something along those lines and when you are having sex with your wife who has birthed three big heads naturally, nothing feels like it's stretching when you are making love to your partner and this is enhanced even more when you have filled your mind with all these different vagina's that you see on the net being "stretched out" same applied for women, if you're looking at videos of "BBCs" every single day and the man you're sleeping next to every day is not a reflection of that, you're going to have a hard time enjoying your sex life with your partner because daily, you have trained your mind that sex needs to be done in a certain way, feel a certain way and must be done with a certain type or size. You have conditioned yourself daily that if it doesn't look like a BBC it certainly cannot be good enough to pleasure me.

Which bring me to me point to say, yes, watching is probably safer than going out there and actually finding someone to pleasure you like you see on the net but is it really a wise decision? Are your safe options really safe or they are detrimental to you in future?

The one thing we hear mostly about is mental health but what role are you playing to ensure that in future you don't have to unlearn or break certain cycles YOU HAVE PLACED YOURSELF IN because of your bad habits? Is it even worth it to have to watched something or place myself in a situation that is going to have me pay hefty amounts of money to sit in an office with a therapist and to work through the consequence of my actions/decisions? I don't dispute the fact that many times we find ourselves in these situations because of things we have not healed from but now that we have identified that we are dying from our own bad decision making, when do we start actually changing and working on ourselves? After posting about it on social media and getting fake reactions so that we can spill more tea?

At some point, we need to start taking accountability for our actions that have led us to the bad state of mentality we are in. At some point, the seeking attention and sympathy needs to be completely cut out, it's toxic and its manipulative. We need to confront whatever it is that keeps us in these situations that feel good for the moment and need to find some tangible to hold on to that will give us everlasting peace. If it means walking around and praying and talking to your spiritual guide, let it be, if it means playing music loud and dancing till you break a sweat, dancing it is. Jogging, taking walks, checking on family, solo dates, whatever it is that you know will help you, do it consistently. Tantrums, throwing things around, gossip, constantly being negative, those things are never going to bring you peace. Posting something shady so that the person is directed to can read, is stupid, it's not going to bring you peace.

The bible talks about fruits of the spirit, my spiritual queens talk about aligning your chakras and when you do all those things, you feel good. Nothing that is done positively with heart ever feels like a waste. Let's deal with the trauma, kick bad habits in the ass and work for a positive mental health.

I'm back beeeeeee :)

xoxo

[cartograffiti]

Dear Yuletide writer 2023 letter

This is a rehash of my optional details, in case a bookmark-able post is easier to work with. I'm SpaceJackalope on Ao3, if context gets separated. My account is set to receive treats, and they are welcome! I'm excited to see what you write, and hope you have fun. While I wrote a boilerplate DNW list, note that some fandoms have variations included, so it is not identical throughout the post.

1) The Queen's Thief - Megan Whalen Turner

Eugenides, Attolia Irene (Feature all.)

I love Irenides, and I especially enjoy fics about them being happy in private, teasing each other, and flirting in ways the court is baffled by. I would be delighted by smut, should you feel so motivated.

DNW: Sexual assault or abuse, domestic violence (I do not consider canon-typical throwing things to be this), Kamet/Nahuseresh, child death (may reference canonical miscarriage, but please don't be more graphic than canon), forced marriages (arranged fine), or AUs that change the setting. I don't enjoy sex scenes with urine, scat, blood, or mockery (embarrassment is fine).

2) The Doomsday Books - K. J. Charles

Gareth Inglis, Joss Doomsday (Feature all.)

Gareth/Joss my beloveds. I would love any sort of sappy content you desire, and am especially interested in the time period between books (Newlyweds? Parenting Luke? Weddings and christenings for Cecy or Sophy? Unconventional domestic bliss? Porn without plot? Porn with canon-typical roleplay?), or after book 2 (housewarming or Christmas with Luke and Rufus?).

DNW: Sexual assault or abuse, domestic violence, child death, or AUs that change the setting. I don't enjoy sex scenes with urine, scat, blood, or mockery (embarrassment is fine).

3) The Tithenai Chronicles - Foz Meadows

Characters field left intentionally blank, I am happy to receive any nominated characters.

I am particularly interested in Caethari & Markel bonding, or Markel/Telitha or Caethari/Velasin focused fics. Cultural differences and relationship negotiation are some of my favorite aspects of ASASE. I would also enjoy a case fic (solving a new mystery) if you feel so inclined. Smut is welcome. I enjoy how this series handles trauma recovery, and would be happy to receive something in that vein.

New release note: All the Hidden Paths will be out in early December. If you happen to write something that contains spoilers for it, be aware I may need to finish the novel before I can respond to your work.

DNW: Fresh incidents of sexual assault or abuse, discussion of canonical incidents without comfort, domestic violence, child death, or AUs that change the setting. I don't enjoy sex scenes with urine, scat, blood, or mockery (embarrassment is fine).

4) Last Binding Series - Freya Marske

Characters field left intentionally blank, I am happy to receive any nominated characters.

I love all of the canon couples, the Blyth sibling relationship, everything about Miss Morrissey, and the Maud-Hawthorn "friends whether he cooperates or not" dynamic. Some of my favorite things about this series are: the magic, the warmth and uniqueness of all the relationships (romantic and not), and the attention to art and technology in the Edwardian period. Case fic (solving a new mystery), date nights, smut, or fics following a single character would all be enjoyed.

New release note: A Power Unbound will be out in early November. I hope to have finished it in time, but if you happen to write something that contains spoilers for it, be aware I may need to finish the novel before I can respond to your work.

DNW: Sexual assault or abuse, domestic violence, child death, or AUs that change the setting. I don't enjoy sex scenes with urine, scat, blood, or mockery (embarrassment is fine).

5) The Cabots - Cat Sebastian

Peter Cabot, Caleb Murphy (Feature All.)

I just think they're neat! Peter and Caleb are my favorite couple in this series, and I love the ease and warmth of their book. Their grumpy for sunshine chemistry delights me, as does their mutual support of each other's ideas, and their "taking it slow but we ARE assuming we will never break up <3" attitude. I am a sucker for road trip stories, and would be happy to see them driving together again. Ideas: porn with or without plot, dates, holidays with the rest of the queer relatives in the series, or postcards from Peter and Caleb to other characters.

DNW: Sexual assault or abuse, domestic violence, child death, or AUs that change the setting. I don't enjoy sex scenes with urine, scat, blood, or mockery (embarrassment is fine).

6) The Left-Handed Booksellers of London - Garth Nix  

Susan Arkshaw

I love the magic and atmosphere of this series, and would love a fic that deals with it. Maybe something inspired by a piece of folklore you love? Susan's inherited powers and her relationship with herself and magic are particularly compelling to me, which is why she is my requested character, but I enjoy her relationships with Merlin, Vivian, and her parents. I also love how this series talks about her varied art interests, and how it deals with gender, both from a queer angle and in the alternate timeline shows women in professions and pop culture roles that were not yet common in the real 1980s; either of these as they relate to Susan would be enjoyable to me. If shipping Susan/Merlin, smut is welcome.

DNW: Explicitly non-platonic Susan/Vivian, sexual assault or abuse, domestic violence, child death, or AUs that change the setting. I don't enjoy sex scenes with urine, scat, blood, or mockery (embarrassment is fine).

[drdemonprince]

1/3 Porn Anon follow up- thank u 4 the thoughtful response! I have one more thought. I agree, shame is a big factor (just not always the specific shames I mentioned). Which is why, for this population, therapeutic approaches fall short in ways that anonymous programs shine. Therapy is not a place they can be honest and therefore it is not a place they can fully release shame.

2/3 I saw many people in those rooms who had done years of trauma therapy but did not feel relief from shame until having an environment where they could be fully honest + where they could see their humanity reflected back by their peers with similar behaviors (and stop seeing themselves as pure monsters).

3/3 I am very critical of 12 step and ultimately left because of the forms of shame that do get reinforced there. But that addiction framework does provide free, accessible, daily support in a way that builds community, reduces isolation, and helps people gather resources. So I think the risk of chucking the addiction framework completely is more material than ideological, at a time when therapy is so often inaccessible and ineffective in these areas.

Well, so I think several things are all being conflated here. AA and similar programs are freely available in nearly every city or small town in the US, often with a variety of time slots and locations to choose from, it's rooted in a Christian anarchist tradition rooted in generosity, non-hierarchical leadership, and nonjudgement, many people are very vocal about how much they love it and have found it healing, and it promotes a model of addiction that we know from scientific studies tends to not be helpful in a vacuum and does not suit non-Christians very well in some cases.

When people think they are "powerless against their addiction" it often predicts them being more likely to relapse and not to develop strategies for managing their desire to use as effectively. In addition AA promotes some practices such as "making amends" with people you no longer talk to that can be really invasive in the service of making the person doing the amends feel better. And of course while AA and similar programs profess to be for anyone of any faith background, the history and structure and practices are all Christian, and the thumbprints of that are all over it, and that makes it not a safe environment for everyone.

I have warm feelings toward AA type programs and the people that go to them! When I was working as a program evaluator the drug treatment program in the jail I was at (this was over a decade ago, I would not do this job now) was rooted in AA and it was a really supportive environment for many of the guys there, and far better than any other option they had as incarcerated people. I think AA and similar programs helps people make new friends, destigmatizes their experiences, and can be super helpful. But I don't think it's because it's a useful theory or model of addiction. I think AA is really successful in spite of its professed beliefs about what addiction is and how it works. It's the freeness and accessibility and humanity of it all that works amazingly.

[writingwithcolor]

Black girl, white brother and imperfect Black parents

@lavender-letterbox asked:

one of the main characters is a black girl whose catalyst for action is the disappearance of her older brother. Said brother, we find out eventually, has been kidnapped and experimented upon by the government, and has gone through trauma and brainwashing. I didn’t want to make a black man into a torture porn character, so I made him a white man that their parents adopted because they were having trouble conceiving (until they had a surprise baby, the aforementioned girl, years later). But now I worry that by making the brother white, I am taking away what could otherwise be wholesome loving relationship between black siblings, which I know is important representation for many people. Their parents (also black) are not always totally perfect parents (the girl sometimes struggles with the feeling that they don’t trust her to make responsible decisions, for instance, and it impacts her ability to see herself as trustworthy) but they are very loving and protective of their children. Any advice would be appreciated on navigating this family dynamic!

I should note that this is not set in modern day–it’s many years in the future, in a post-apocalyptic cyberpunk world. Thank you so much in advance!

Adopting the white son

I do not know many Black people who go out of their way to adopt white children. I personally happen to know or know of two families total. One case she did not know the child or the family at all. In the other case she was close to the white family of the child she adopted. I see Black folks adopting Black and BIPOC mixed race children way more, personally. Of course, this isn’t to say it doesn’t happen! So I won’t declare it as unrealistic, just a bit more rarer than what I'm used to. Your story is in a whole different world, so perhaps things, and adoption options, are different.

Black sibling bond

I appreciate you don’t have a Black man being tortured.

If you’d like to create a Black sibling bond, and add some Black man representation...

You could always add another sibling, adopted or otherwise.

Or perhaps the parents end up with twins!

She might have a close Black friend or relative that is like a brother to her.

The Black parents

I don’t see issues on its face with the imperfect parents. Do perfect parents exist? Her struggles with them not seeing her as responsible enough is a common dilemma between parents and their kids and doesn’t necessarily reflect on bad parenting. I certainly dealt with that!

Perhaps they are:

Overprotective of their daughter

Strict and she’s clashing with their parenting style

She did something that made them lose some trust in her

There are misunderstandings that make her believe they don’t trust her as they should, but really they do and are afraid of real dangers out there

These are just suggestions. It seems like you have a good handle on things!

~Mod Colette

[coochiequeens]

Finally another man is telling men who want to be in a relationship with women to be better and stop blaming women for rejecting them.

KEY POINTS

Dating opportunities for heterosexual men are diminishing as healthy relationship standards change.

Men represent approximately 62% of dating app users, lowering their chances for matches.

Men need to address skills deficits to meet healthier relationship expectations.

Younger and middle-aged men are the loneliest they’ve ever been in generations, and it’s probably going to get worse.

This is not my typical rosy view of relationships but a reality nonetheless. Over the last 30 years, men have become a larger portion of that growing group of long-term single people. And while you don’t actually need to be in a relationship to be happy, men typically are happier and healthier when partnered.

Here are three broad trends in the relationship landscape that suggest heterosexual men are in for a rough road ahead:

Dating Apps. Whether you’re just starting to date or you’re recently divorced and dating again, dating apps are a huge driver of new romantic connections in the United States. The only problem is that upwards of 62% of users are men and many women are overwhelmed with how many options they have. Competition in online dating is fierce, and lucky in-person chance encounters with dreamy partners are rarer than ever.

Relationship Standards. With so many options, it’s not surprising that women are increasingly selective. I do a live TikTok show (@abetterloveproject) and speak with hundreds of audience members every week; I hear recurring dating themes from women between the ages of 25 and 45: They prefer men who are emotionally available, good communicators, and share similar values.

Skills Deficits. For men, this means a relationship skills gap that, if not addressed, will likely lead to fewer dating opportunities, less patience for poor communication skills, and longer periods of being single. The problem for men is that emotional connection is the lifeblood of healthy, long-term love. Emotional connection requires all the skills that families are still not consistently teaching their young boys.

While there’s probably no chance of stemming the rising tide of unintentional single men, there is still good news.

The algorithms are becoming increasingly more complex on dating apps and other online platforms. One benefit is that great matches are on the rise. Hinge, one dating app, found through beta trials that 90% of users rated their first date positively, with 72% indicating wanting a second date.

How can men reap the benefit of the algorithms? Level up your mental health game. That means getting into some individual therapy to address your skills gap. It means valuing your own internal world and respecting your ideas enough to communicate them effectively. It means seeing intimacy, romance, and emotional connection as worthy of your time and effort. 

Ultimately, we have an opportunity to revolutionize romantic relationships and establish new healthy norms starting with a first date. It’s likely that some of these romances will be transformative and healing, disrupting generational trauma, and establishing a fresh culture of admiration and validation.

Men have a key role in this transformation but only if they go all-in. It’s going to take that kind of commitment to themselves, to their own mental health, to the kind of love they want to generate in this world. Will we step up?

By

“Younger and middle-aged men are the loneliest they’ve ever been in generations”. Who would have thought that the generations of men raised with early access to porn, and sicker porn than was available to generations before, and addiction to game ing would have trouble keeping a relationship.

So glad he’s not another man blaming women for being to demanding instead of just accepting that so many of today’s men are not relationship material.

[inevitably-johnlocked]

heeeey any insecure!john?

Hi Nonny!

Ahhhh, you know I’ve collected fics over the years but I’ve mixed them up with the Sherlock ones, so I think I’ll start anew and start fresh! I know I’ve missed a lot when I pulled them out of the old lists, so forgive me! Hope you enjoy what I’ve got here for you!

As always, Lovelies, please add your insecure John fics!!

INSECURE JOHN

See also:

BAMF! But Insecure John

Insecure / Awkward John or Sherlock (Jan 2019)

Concussions And Good Old Fashioned Awkwardness by Belldere (K+, 894 w. || Humour, Hospitals, Mild John Whump, Misunderstandings, Platonic Relationship, Concussions, Not-Gay John, Possessive Sherlock) – When John lands himself in hospital... again, all he wants is to just get out of there as soon as possible, too bad his doctor has other ideas about where John may be getting his injuries. Good thing concussions make everything strangely funnier.

I Was Wrong by AllesandraQuartermaine (K, 1,496 w., 1 Ch. || TGG AU, Friendship, Hospitalization / Injury, John’s Self Esteem, Sleepy Sherlock) – Sherlock and John have a conversation a few days after the pool face off with Moriarty. And John hears something quite surprising.

Hell or High water by bluefire301175 (E, 2,250 w., 1 Ch. || PWP, Frottage, Alley Sex, First Person POV John, Case-ish Fic, Mutual Pining, Bed Sharing) – John wants. Sherlock wants. Plain and simple.

Not My Proudest Moment by charlock221 (K, 2,695 w., 1 Ch. || Lunar New Year, Mild PTSD / Panic Attack, Coping Mechanisms, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort) – John tries his best not to get in the way of Sherlock's cases, but when the vivid noises of fireworks unnerve his senses and begin to bring back unwanted memories of Afghanistan, he cannot help but to hope Sherlock will notice and help him before things go too far.

Closeted by Sexxica (E, 2,762 w., 1 Ch. || Trapped in a Closet, Panicking Sherlock, Hand Jobs, Coming in Pants, Awkward Conversations, Love Confessions, First Kiss, Fluffy Ending) – An improvised hiding spot and a bit of accidental voyeurism leave John and Sherlock in an awkward position.

The General Idea by agirlsname (T, 3,022 w., 1 Ch. || Retirement, Promise of Forever / Proposal, POV John, First Kiss, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Soft Sherlock, Idiots in Love, Crying / Emotional Sherlock, Love Confessions) – After twenty years of friendship, John is used to Sherlock acting weirdly. But the news Sherlock finally brings himself to deliver change the carefully built dynamics between them, and John realises it's time to act.

Paranoia by Ewebie (M, 3,789 w., 1 Ch. || Humour, Drinking Games, Scotland Yard Gang, Jealous / Possessive Sherlock, Inappropriate Questions, Embarrassed John, Matchmakers) – John and Sherlock join the gang of Scotland Yard for a night of drinking, and it gets a bit personal and revealing.

Coldness/Heat by agirlsname (E, 3,790 w., 1 Ch. || Cuddling & Snuggling, Body Heat, New Year’s Eve, PWP, Bedsharing, Frottage) – The inn is booked up on New Year's Eve. The train home is cancelled because of the snow. The only option is to sleep in the non-heated guest room of a client, and John and Sherlock are freezing. You know where this is going. Part 1 of New Year's Kiss

The Oolong Disaster by unicornpoe (T, 4,151 w., 1 Ch. || John’s Beard, Fluff, Humour, Frustrated Sherlock, John Takes Care of Sherlock, Case Fic-ish, Pining Sherlock, First Kiss, Possessive Sherlock) – John has a beard. Sherlock has a panic attack.

Afghanistan in Baskerville by Amaya Ramiel (K+, 4,357 w., 1 Ch. || THoB Fic, Hurt/Comfort, Drugged John, PTSD / Panic Attack, Hallucinations, Worried Sherlock, John’s Past, Friendship) – What if John hadn't seen the hound when Sherlock trapped him in the lab? What if instead, his very real nightmares of the war had materialized all around him? Trapped and drugged, John can't tell what's real and what's not. How will Sherlock react?

Overture by Kate_Lear (M, 4,435 w., 1 Ch. || First Kiss / Time, Friends to Lovers, Angry John, Introspection, Dev. Rel., Embarrassed / Insecure Sherlock, Morning After, Bed Sharing, Cuddles / Limpet Sherlock) – A short snippet on how John and Sherlock might have got together.

What You Are Worth by Lastew (T, 4,488 w., 1 Ch. || Observant but Insecure John, Friendship, Crime / Case Fic) – John helps Sherlock with a case, but he questions his real value to Sherlock.  

Let Down by Gandalf3213 (K+, 4,505 w., 2 Ch. || Hurt/Comfort, Friendship, John Whump, Insecure John) – John truly is sorry for letting Sherlock down. The only thing he wanted to do was finish the case, but bleeding out in a dark alley makes it harder for him to pursue that murderer running out of sight.

Sherlock and John Go Clubbing by wendymarlowe (E, 4,716 w., 3 Ch. || Clubbing, Dirty Talk, Dancing, Coming Untouched, Coming in Pants, Bi John, For a Case, Friends to Lovers, Flirting, Sherlock is Lost for Words, Sexy John, Mutual Pining, Possessive John, Floor Sex/Hand Job/Frottage) – John pinched the bridge of his nose - even for Sherlock, this was a new level of no bloody boundaries. “You want me to go with you to a gay club, wait around twiddling my thumbs while I let you get pawed by a criminal, then out-flirt him and talk you into coming home with me instead?” Part 32 of John and Sherlock's Kinky First Times

Pillow Talk by scullyseviltwin (M, 5,183 w., 1 Ch. || Post-S3, Angsty Fluff, Pillow Talk, Bed Sharing, Worried John, First Time Morning After, Soft Sherlock, Sexuality Discussion, Love Confessions, Kisses and Cuddles) – John has been looking at Sherlock for ages, it feels like.

Welcome Home, John by slashscribe (G, 5,504 w., 1 Ch. || Post-S3, Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Awkwardness, Stabbed Sherlock, Protective Sherlock, Panic Attack (Sherlock), Self Esteem Issues, Love Confessions, First Kiss) – When John moves back to 221B, he thinks he’s the broken one, but after a while, it becomes clear that he might not be correct.

An Interpretation of Viewing Habits by akitsuko (E, 6,653 w., 1 Ch. || Porn Watching, Masturbation, Anal, Friends to Lovers, First Kiss / Time, Declarations of Love, Jealous Sherlock, Fantasizing, John in Denial / Internalized Homophobia, Bottomlock, Pining Idiots, Sherlock Has No Boundaries, Cockblocking Sherlock) – John watches porn. It's a perfectly normal thing to do.If every video he watches happens to feature actors with remarkable physical similarities to his flatmate, well, that's no one's business but his own. Or: John is in denial, until his infatuation with Sherlock is impossible to deny anymore.

Inconvenient Timing by TheMadKatter13 (M, 7,072 w., 1 Ch. || Omegaverse || Omega John/Alpha Sherlock, Romance, Public Heat, Scared John, Protective / Worried / Possessive Sherlock, Post-TBB AU, Caring Sherlock, Pre-Slash, Happy Ending) – When John's heat failed to appear three times in a row after he was shot, he figured it was just another broken piece off the broken toy soldier. So he was rather surprised to feel it start out of the blue...and not at all pleased with it starting while he was on the tube.

Sometimes When We Touch by kedgeree (M, 7,755 w., 6 Ch. || Post-TRF, First Kiss/Time, Inappropriate Giggling, Romance, Friends to Lovers, Virgin Sherlock, John Whump, Touching) – John might be touching Sherlock a little more often than is strictly necessary. Sherlock probably hasn't even noticed. Right...?

Victim, Bait, Hero, Friend by KimberlyTheOwl (T, 7,887 w., 1 Ch. || Post-TGG Epilogue, Angst, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Introspection, Past Kidnapping / Torture / Implied Rape, Panic Attacks, Worried / Possessive Sherlock, Lestrade is a Good Friend) – Some insights into why John was perfectly willing to throw everything away for a chance to kill Moriarty at the pool. Trauma, ugliness, and finally healing. Some nice supporting work by Lestrade as well.

Every Night I Look for You by destinationtoast (E, 8,377 w., 1 Ch. || POV John, Post-TRF, Angst, Mystery, Unsafe Sex, BAMF John) – Every night, John looks for familiar hints of Sherlock in the men he meets in bars, and he does with them all the things he wishes he’d done before. Eventually, he stumbles into a situation that Sherlock would know how to handle, and John must decide whether he can handle it without him.

Just Like That by sussexbound (E, 8,442 w., 1 Ch. || First Time/Kiss, Frottage, Virgin Sherlock, French Kissing, Anal, Emotional Lovemaking, Enthusiastic Consent, Tenderness, Crying John, Bathing/Washing, Insecure John, Toplock) – John doesn’t want to talk anymore. He wants. Oh dear god, how he wants. For the first time in what feels like years he WANTS.

Unwasted by patternofdefiance (E, 8,966 w., 1 Ch. || Post-S3 / S3 Fix-It, Developing Relationship, Friends to Lovers, Angelo’s, Fluff, First Time, Anal, Cum Play, Flashbacks to ASiB, Mutual Pining, Love Confessions, Bottomlock, Cuddles, Multiple Orgasms, BJ’s, Bed Sharing) – John finds it three months after he's moved back. He's on the hunt for something to make for dinner, is scrounging through the cupboards, when he happens upon the graveyard of pasta boxes Sherlock still seems to create when left to his own devices. Behind seven boxes of pasta, all almost completely empty, is a dark-glassed bottle, with a paler coat of dust. It's unopened. John's face falls slack when he sees it, instantly recognises it, and for a long moment he just stands and looks at it.

Ravish Me by amalnahurriyeh (E, 10,025 w., 1 Ch. || UST / RST, Makeup / Lipstick, Sympathetic Sally, Experiments, Pining John, First Kiss, Face Fucking / BJ’s, Cuddling) – Sherlock is experimenting with patterns of wear on lipstick in daily encounters. John is going to go insane.

A Is For Aftermath by ElvendorkInfinity (T, 10,567 w.,  1 Ch. || Injury / Whump, Hurt/Comfort, Friendship/Pre-Slash/Bromance/Platonics, Hallucinations, Introspection, Insecure / Worried John, Big Brother Mycroft, Alternating POV, Anxious Sherlock, Self-Deprecating, Mildly Possessive Sherlock, 3G Moment) – John is still hallucinating, Sherlock cannot sleep, and Lestrade has a new case for them. But will life at 221B ever be able to return to normal? Epilogue to M is for Moriarty.

London Gods by a_different_equation (E, 11,092 w., 5 Ch. || American Gods Fusion || Magical Realism, Sex Magic, True Love, PTSD John, First Kiss/Time, Marathon Sex, Sensuality, Genie Sherlock, Human John, Internalized Homophobia, Star-Crossed Lovers, Soul Mates) – Sherlock Holmes is a jinn who does not grant wishes. However, when Dr. John H. Watson, recently returned from the war in Afghanistan, gets into his cab by "accident", it might not even need magic to grant both men their deepest wish: love.

On The Fence by BeautifulFiction (T, 13,770 w., 1 Ch. || Fencing, Case Fic, First Kiss, Insecure John, Pining John, Hug, Greg Finds Out) – The murder of the King's College fencing champion leads to revelations about Sherlock's past. Will it be the point that tips them from friends to lovers, or will they remain on the fence?

A Silver Sixpence by _doodle (NC-17, 16,400 w., 2 Ch. || LJ Fic || For a Case / Case Fic, Fake Relationship, Humour, Romance, Marriage Proposal, Awkward Idiots, Cuddling, Touching, Kissing, Love Confessions, Bed Sharing, Friends to Lovers, Fake Until It’s Not, Schmoop and Fluff, Bottomlock) – “John, we need to get married. It’s for a case, not any romantic notions on my part pertaining to our partnership,” Sherlock said, with brutal honesty, and without even looking up.

Between Friends by SilentAuror (E, 18,036 w., 1 Ch. || Post S3, Alternating POV, Friends to Lovers, John in Denial, Abduction, Awkward Situations / Miscommunications, Porn With Feels, Blowjobs, Pining, Unrequited, Angst With Happy Ending) – Sherlock gets abducted. As John discovers him tied up naked in an empty storage facility and comes to rescue him, Sherlock's body has an unfortunate reaction which triggers a series of events. John is convinced that everything will be fine as long as they never discuss it. Sherlock isn't as sure...

Division by MrsNoggin (E, 19,542 w., 11 Ch. || Coffee Shop AU || First Kiss/Time, Fluff, Barista Sherlock, Clingy Sherlock, POV John, John’s Limp, Bed Sharing, Fluff, Sleepy Cuddles, Sensuality, Touching, Virgin Sherlock, Insecure John) – John likes mysteries. And every morning he dips into the local independent coffee bar with his newspaper and ponders another... one Sherlock Holmes.

A Life Well-Lived by Kate_Lear (E, 20,121 w., 1 Ch. || Original Male Character, Sherlock Woos John, Jealous Sherlock, Reluctant Bi-John, Past Abuse, Insecure John, Reassuring / Caring Sherlock, Protective Sherlock, Understanding Sherlock) – John got scared off men by an abusive past relationship. Sherlock has to try and woo him while not scaring him off with protective possessive rage.

Maintaining A Personal Life by Gingerhermit (E, 24,284 w., 6 Ch. || Alternating POV’s, Bisexuality, BAMF!John, Jealous Sherlock, Romance / Drama, Sort-of Case Fic, Peril & Angst, Love Confessions, Toplock, Soft Idiots in Love, Post S3) – Sherlock and John discover some interesting revelations about each other’s sexuality, which lead them both to question the assumptions they've made about one another for years. In the midst of their mutual discoveries, a dangerous psychopath looms on the side-lines who threatens to destroy their new beginning.

Nothing to Make a Song About by emmagrant01 (E, 36,833 w., 10 Ch. || Post-TRF, First Time, Reunion, Jealous John, Pining Sherlock, Romance, Angst with Happy Ending, Sherlock Has a Boyfriend) – When Sherlock returned from his faked death, John could not forgive him for the deception and broke off their friendship. Ten years later, John returns to London in search of yet another new beginning. Sherlock, not surprisingly, is waiting.

Turn Left at the Park by Glenmore (NR (E), 37,409 w., 28 Ch. || Alternate First Meeting / ASiP Divergence, Case Fic, Depression, Suicidal Ideation, Loneliness, No Mary, Possessive Sherlock, Fluff & Angst, Nightmares/PTSD, Sherlock Saves John, Sherlock Whump-ish, Doctor John) – So what would have happened if John hadn't walked through the park and met Stamford? What if, instead, he walked around the park and just went home?

Only To Be With You by SinceWhenDoYouCallMe_John (M, 40,768 w., 4 Ch. || Black Mirror / Future AU || Character Death, Future Technology, Sickness/Cancer/Illness, Heavy Angst with Happy Ending, First Person POV John, Pining John, Heart-Wrenching Angst) – I tell myself that next time I’ll come near this same place again. Wait around for the mysterious stranger in his coat to dash past me, hot on the heels of a new criminal in black. I think this all the way back to my Exit, planning where I’ll wait and what I’ll say when I see him. Scheming on how to get his name. It’s only once I reach the Exit Point door that I realize two hours and forty-five minutes have passed, and I realize that this won’t be the last time I Visit. It won’t be the last time at all.

The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse by SilentAuror (E, 50,635 w., 1 Ch. || Post-S4/S4 Divergence, Case Fic, For a Case / Reverse Fake-Relationship, Conferences, Marriage Equality, Travelling / New York, Pride, Homophobia, Bottomlock, Marriage Proposal, John POV, Sexuality, Love Confessions, Emotional Love Making, Public Hand Jobs, Blow Jobs, Passionate Kissing, Needy/Clingy Sherlock, Virgin Sherlock, Touching / Hand Holding, Bed Sharing, Little Spoon Sherlock, Intense Orgasms) – John and Sherlock go to New York to attend a conference run by the National Defence of Traditional Marriage Coalition in order to investigate the potential bombing of the annual Manhattan Pride parade. As the conference unfolds, John finds himself repulsed by the toxic ideology being presented, which becomes relevent to his own unacknowledged issues and his friendship with Sherlock...

Never Change a Running System by Lorelei_Lee (E, 54,246 w., 18 Ch. || Pre-TRF, Romance, Humour, Drama, Sex Toys, Anal, Rimming, Masturbation, Frottage, Blow Jobs, Public Sex, First Kiss / Time, Virgin Sherlock / Loss of Virginity, Accidental Voyeurism, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Experiments, Naive Sherlock, Pining Sherlock, Jealous Sherlock, Possessive Sherlock, Straight With an Exception John, Hand Jobs) – Sherlock discovers his sexuality – with far-reaching consequences for John.

The Thing Is by TSylvestris (E, 56,743 w., 21 Ch. || Case Fic, Dev. Rel., Anal/Oral, Blow Jobs, Meddling Mycroft, Drama, Romance, Humour, Casual Encounters, Pining Idiots, Possessive Sherlock, Orgasm Delay, Rough / Alley Sex, Public Sex, John Whump, Drugged John, Emotional Love Making, Awkward Relationship, Marriage of Convenience, Switchlock) – The problem with living with Sherlock, John thought, was that you never, never, ever knew the significance of anything. Like your flatmate's nose buried in your hair. Whilst you're in bed. Part 1 of Nitroglycerine

One Little Change by jadztone (E, 58,312 w., 12 Ch. || ASiB Divergence, Fake Relationship, Bed Sharing, Mutual Pining, Friends to Lovers, First Kiss / Time, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Bi John / Gay Demisexual Sherlock, Switchlock, Alternating POV, Jealousy, Misunderstandings, Case Fic, Angst with Happy Ending, Emotional Love Making, Butt Plugs, Cuddles) – Our story begins right after John and Sherlock's first meeting with Irene Adler in September. It splits off into an AU that imagines them taking a case where they act as bait to hook a killer targeting closeted gays in secret relationships. In the weeks leading up to Christmas, many things happen that have our boys wondering if maybe they have a chance with each other. Then Irene fakes her death on Christmas Eve, and things get a lot more complicated - especially since they still have a killer to catch.

Isosceles by SilentAuror (E, 56,609 w., 7 Ch. || Post-S4, POV John, Original Male Character / Sherlock Dates Another Man, Love Triangle, Jealous John, Virgin Sherlock, Sexual Coaching, Angst, Romance, Domesticity, Unrequited Feelings, Miscommunication, First Kiss/Time, For a Case, Friends With Benefits, Bottomlock, Love Confessions, Spooning) – After solving a case for a major celebrity, Sherlock gets himself asked out. When John asks, he discovers that Sherlock has no intention of going, at least not until John agrees to coach him through whatever he might need to know for his date...

floating through a dark blue sky by Lediona (M, 58,966 w., 15 Ch. || Notting Hill AU || POV John, Celebrity Sherlock, First Date / Time / Kiss, Past Drug Addiction, Angst with a Happy Ending) – Of course, I’d seen his films and always thought he was, well, brilliant -- but, you know, a million miles from the world I live in. Or, when John is the owner of a travel book shop and the famous Sherlock Holmes stops in one day.

The Book of Silence by SilentAuror (E, 60,056 w., 2 Ch. || S4 Fix It / Post S4, Virgin Sherlock, Rosie / Parentlock, Domesticity, Fluff, Praise Kink, Sex Toys, First Person POV) – As spring blooms in London, John and Sherlock begin to take new cases and cautiously negotiate this new phase of life with John living at Baker Street again. Despite how well it's all going, John struggles to forgive himself for the way he treated Sherlock following Mary’s death as well as trying to figure out how to finally put his long-time feelings for Sherlock into words. Part 1 of The Book of Silence/Rosa Felicia

Scars by SilentAuror (E, 60,494 w., 5 Ch. || Rape / Non-Con / Abuse, Gaslighting, Manipulation, Dub Con Elements, Homophobia, Angst With Happy Ending, Mary is Not Nice) – S3 rewrite, showing Mary’s manipulation of John as he realizes his love for Sherlock. Mary is not having it.

The Bells of King's College by SilentAuror (E, 64,019 w., 5 Ch. || Post-S4, Missed Opportunities, Angst with Happy Ending, Fake Relationship, Case Fic, John POV, Jealous John, John in Denial, Travelling / Holidays, Virgin Sherlock, Wedding Proposals) – It's only been two weeks since Eurus Holmes disrupted their lives when Mycroft sends John and Sherlock to Cambridge to pose as an engaged couple at a wedding show in the hopes of solving six unsolved deaths...

White Knight by DiscordantWords (M, 69,840 w., 13 Ch. || S4 Compliant/Post S4, Marriage For a Case, Jealous John, Pining John, Janine / Sherlock Fake Relationship, Serial Killers, Case Fic, Undercover as a Couple, Weddings, John is a Mess, Misunderstandings, Wedding Planning, Jealousy, Drunkenness, Love Confessions, Angst with Happy Ending) – Green. The word green was used to convey a great many things. Illness. Envy. Inexperience. Standing there amidst Janine's chattering bridesmaids, watching Sherlock furrow his brow and study fabric swatches, watching him smile and simper and flirt, John thought it a remarkably apt colour choice. Because he felt quite sick to his stomach, he feared the source of said sickness might very well be jealousy, and he had absolutely no idea at all what to do about it. Or: Sherlock needs to fake a relationship for a case. He doesn't ask John.

Just To Hold You Close by sussexbound (E, 70,841 w., 18 Ch. || Alternate First Meeting, Sherlock POV, ASD Sherlock, PTSD John, Demisexual Sherlock, Bisexual John, Cuddling/Snuggling, Platonic Cuddling, Enthusiastic Consent, Bed Sharing, Love Confessions, First Kiss/Time, Sexual Tension, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Cuddle Negotiations, For a Case Until It Isn’t, Hair Petting, Sexual Negotiation, Anxiety, Trust Issues, Slow Burn, Panic Attacks, Frottage, Hand/Blow Jobs, Referenced Self Harm / Abuse / Suicidal Ideation, First Kiss/Time, Anal) – When a woman is murdered and the last person to see her alive is recently invalided army vet turned reluctant (and prickly) professional cuddler, John Watson, Sherlock Holmes is pulled into a world of intimacy and intrigue he never could have imagined. John is a conundrum and mystery: frank yet reserved, tender yet angry, open yet afraid. Sherlock is instantly drawn into his orbit, and begins to feel and desire things he never has before.

Secrets and Revelations by Hisstah (E, 83,535 w., 9 Ch. || Sentinel / Guides Omegaverse AU || Adventure, Violence, Anal / Oral, Omega!John / Alpha!Sherlock, Case Fic, Politics, Mild DubCon) – Dr John Watson has some major secrets that he's kept from his flatmate, Alpha Sentinel Sherlock Holmes. Now the Sentinel Tower is after him. Can John stay out of their hands until he can reveal his secrets to Sherlock? Part 1 of Secrets and Revelations

Kintsukuroi by sussexbound (E, 91,823 w., 20 Ch. || S4 Compliant / Post-TLD, Grief / Mourning, PTSD, Internalized Homophobia, Therapy, Past Abuse, Alcohol Abuse, Nightmares, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Depression, Anxiety, Bed Sharing, Love Confessions, Cuddling, Suicidal Ideation, Masturbation, Minor Character Death, Sexting, Frottage, Inexperienced Sherlock, Rimming / Anal / BJ’s, Emotional Turmoil, Finding Each Other, John’s Self Esteem Issues) – “I love you.” Sherlock sees the words hit John with almost physical force. He reels back a little, jaw twitching and eyes filling. “I love you,” he repeats, a little softer, a little more gentle, as earnest as he possibly can. Because they’ve been teetering on the brink of this thing for years, and it had become painfully obvious over the last few months that they were at a tipping point. This had to happen. Now it has. Now they can see where they end up. The tears in John’s eyes spill over, and he wipes at them angrily. “Do you even know what that means?”  

The Cost of a Wish by slashscribe (E, 102,493 w., 12 Ch. || xxxHolic Fusion || Spirits / Ghosts and Magic, Love Confessions, Slow Burn, Soul Mates / Fated Lovers, Adventure, Immortal Sherlock, Powerful John, POV John, Frottage, Wish Granting, Angst with Happy Ending, Nightmares) – John has been plagued by a secret his entire life that has made him feel hopeless until he meets a mysterious, seemingly omniscient man named Sherlock Holmes who owns a wish-granting shop. Their meeting sets off a series of inevitable events that will change the course of both of their lives forever.

Maintenance and Repair by patternofdefiance (E, 106,650 w., 71 Ch. || Future AU, Augmentation || Augmented John, Depression, Body Modification, Slow Burn, Worldbuilding, Sci-Fi, Self-Care, Body Dysmorphia) – John wants to explain the rush of sensation and data, which is just another form of sensation (or is it the other way around?). John wants to say: Augmentation circuits report temperature, pressure, various forms of quantitative input. Sudden changes are reported as pain, since sudden changes are dangerous, and pain is the quickest way to encourage reflexive extraction. But all John can manage is, “Nng.” Because this sudden touch is not reporting as pain. Part 2 of STATIC

A Study in Winning by Jupiter_Ash (E, 106,658 w., 11 Ch. || Tennis AU || John POV, Dirty Talk, Mutual Pining, Misunderstandings, Happy Ending, Sherlock Speaks French, Switchlock, Wimbledon) – John and Sherlock are professional tennis players and it’s Wimbledon. One is a broken almost was at the end of his career, the other an arrogant rising star tipped for greatness. It should have been a straightforward tournament. It really should have been. How were they to know that a chance encounter would change everything? Part 1 of Tennis

Shatter the Darkness (Let the Light In) by MojoFlower (E, 109,683 w., 23 Ch. || PODFIC AVAILABLE || Genie/Djinn AU || Magical Realism, Kidnapping, Genie Sherlock, First Kiss / Time, Case Fic, H/C, Angst, Clubs, John Whump, Mild DubCon, Hand / Blow Jobs, Torture) – Fairy tales are for those who remember how to dream; not John Watson, broken and hiding from his bleak future in a beige bedsit. But then he discovers a lamp and finds himself in the dangerous riptide of an enigmatic man whose very existence is unbelievable, murder charges against his sister, and the growing pains of feeling alive once more.

The Burning Heart by May_Shepard (M, 119,150 w., 21 Ch. || Canon Divergence, Post-TRF, John’s Sexuality, S3 Rewrite, Pining, Angst with a Happy Ending, POV John Watson, John’s Gay) – When Sherlock dies, John Watson feels like his life is over too. He’s completely shut down, until Mark Morstan, a new nurse at John’s medical clinic, catches his attention, and helps him uncover the long buried truth of his attraction to men. Although he’s certain he’ll never get over Sherlock, John plans to move on, and build a new life with Mark, unaware that Sherlock is not quite as dead as he appears, and that Mark is hiding secrets of his own.

The Adventure of the Silver Scars by tangledblue (NR [M], 142,458 w., 41 Ch. || S3 Fix-It, Post-HLV/ Post-TAB / Canon Compliant, Case Fic, No Baby, Angst, Humour, UST, Slow Burn, Angry John, Reconciliation, Not Nice Mary / Leaving Mary, Dependent Sherlock, Pining Sherlock, Caretaker John, Fist Fights, It’s An Experiment, Virgin Sherlock, Dancing, Drugging, John Whump, Pet Names, Sherlock’s Mind Palace, Scars) – It’s been thirteen months since Mary shot Sherlock and John finds he’s still pissed off about it. Sherlock had thought everything was settled: John and Mary, domestic bliss. But when John turns up at Baker Street with suitcases, the world’s only consulting detective might not be prepared for the consequences. A new case. Some old scores to settle. Certain danger. Concertos, waltzes, and whisky.

Proving A Point by elldotsee & J_Baillier (E, 186,270 w., 28 Ch. || Me Before You Fusion || Medical Realism, Insecure John, Depression, Romance, Angst, POV John, Sherlock Whump, Serious Illness, Doctor John, Injury Recovery, Assisted Suicide, Sherlock’s Violin, Awkward Sexual Situations, Alcoholism, Drugs, Idiots in Love, Slow Burn, Body Image, Friends to Lovers, Hurt / Comfort, Pain, Big Brother Mycroft, Intimacy, Anxiety, PTSD, Family Issues, Psychological Trauma, John Whump, Case Fics, Loneliness, Pain) – Invalided home from Afghanistan, running out of funds and convinced that his surgical career is over, John Watson accepts a mysterious job offer to provide care and companionship for a disabled person. Little does he know how much hangs in the balance of his performance as he settles into his new life at Musgrave Court.

[jupitermelichios]

I posted 267 times in 2022

159 posts created (60%)

108 posts reblogged (40%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@jupitermelichios

@kiseiakhun

@morethanonepage

@definitelynotaminion

@theroseandthebeast

I tagged 222 of my posts in 2022

Only 17% of my posts had no tags

#my fics - 58 posts

#eurovision - 36 posts

#esc 2022 - 36 posts

#sterek - 32 posts

#creature!stiles - 24 posts

#sterek fanfiction - 24 posts

#teen wolf fic - 24 posts

#the outcry of wolves - 23 posts

#teen wolf fanfiction - 22 posts

#vampire!stiles - 21 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#do you think you being an asshole on tumblr.com is going to magically bankrupt disney wil the steve ditko lawsuit and break up the monopoly

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

i want this to go about 60% harder than it does, but i fucking love all the outfits

103 notes - Posted May 10, 2022

#4

So it occurred to me while working on my new teen wolf writing project that Stiles's dad is absolutely drowning in medical debt so probably can't afford to give Stiles much of an allowance, if any, and Stiles never mentions or goes to a part-time job, and yet he can afford a completely unexpected $1500 mechanic's bill when Erica breaks his Jeep, and buys an insane amount of stuff for Lydia's birthday, and even though he'd been planning to return most of it, he's sixteen at that point, he definitely doesn't have a credit card and probably doesn't have an overdraught, so he had to have had that money on hand, so I'm trying to figure out where his money comes from.

so far my possibilities are:

- its ad money from his youtube channel where he uploads deliberately shitty and out of focus footage of 'real werewolf sightings'

- it's sponsorship money from his podcast where he just talks completely truthfully about his life and half his audience think it's an ARG and the other half are just there to see if he'll ever actually admit this is all fiction

- he has a twitch channel where he streams exclusively games about werewolves

- all the 2012 sterek fics are correct and he's selling pictures of his neck to horny werewolves online

- turned his life into successful a pen and paper rpg and it's sourcebook money

- secret MLM double life. his facebook account name is karen and he's a double black diamond and he would love to talk to you about what herbalife can do for you

- he got in at the start of bitcoin before we knew it was an elaborate ponzi scheme and managed to actually cash out

- makes 8bit chiptune covers of britney songs on bandcamp

- just an insane amount of paid surveys. so many surveys

- furry porn artist

- mlp porn artist

- he's actually had physical job this entire time but it's doing something embarrasing and he never mentions it because he doesn't want scott to know. it probably involves a mascot costume of some kind

- a boring sensible option like part time web-dev or translation work

- fraud

- just straight up theft

123 notes - Posted January 28, 2022

#3

writing Chrissy's perspective: wow there's so many fascinating people in the world, maybe I am loveable after all, maybe my identity is more complex and nuanced than I ever realised before, gosh I really feel like I'm growing as a person and starting to confront some of the deep seated trauma that has shaped me as a person, eddie is such a wise supportive friend i learn so much from him

writing Eddie's perspective: oh my god she's so cute why is she so cute who the fuck approved this god is personally testing me by making her so cute she's adorable she's-

132 notes - Posted October 20, 2022

#2

love the decision to dress the female host as a TOS star trek villain

much better than her previous dress, which made her look like her texture hadn't finished loading

164 notes - Posted May 10, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

so someone on the buffy wiki asked a question that i have basically been thinking about non-stop since i saw it

how would btvs be different if spike had died when he was originally planned to, during the church collapse in season 2

and there's a lot of interesting logistical questions (honestly the answer is not much, he very rarely actually contributes to the main plot, probably because most of the writers room hated using him) like how would s7 end (you just create a different arbitrary mcguffin), would the buffybot still exist (probably yes, you just make her a warren or a jonathan thing and remove spike from the equation), what would buffy's s6 unhealthy coping mechanism be (my instinct is to say a buffy/xander subplot, which would be objectively worse but would hit basically all the same narrative beats, and would also make the xander/anya breakup feel a bit less weird)

but that isn't the reason i've been obsessing over this

the reason i've been obsessing over this is that if spike dies in that church, drusilla should logically become a recurring villain, probably hitting a lot of the same broad plot beats as spike did

and now i can't stop thinking about a version of buffy where dru gets actual character developement, where they have to think of cool shit to do with her future-seeing powers (being completely incidental to the plot is a very weird quality for clairvoyent powers to have tbh but they never once make effective use of them in the show)

and i also realised that in a version of season 6 where dru is a main cast member, or at least a recurring guest star, the obvious choice would be for her to mentor willow

willow never gets any kind of magic teacher in any way that matters, and she never gets to talk to another canon-queer person apart from tara, and giving willow a mentor figure who is magic and queer and probably pretty supportive, but also is absolutely 100% trying to make willow worse would be so interesting! and maybe it would force the writers to remember that giles knows magic, and you could have a 'which will willow choose' dynamic going on between this proudly bi proudly magic vampire and the closetted deeply afraid of his own magic human and it could be so interesting! like i fucking love spike and giles's canon relationship, but it never goes anywhere and this would absolutely have to go somewhere

also there would obviously be a subplot, probably in season 4, about dru manipulating events to bring spike back from the dead, but he'd come back as human, and the scoobies would want to protect him from her both because he's human and because spike died before they realised he's not actually a threat so they think vampire spike is a big deal, so he'd be a main cast member and build relationships with them all, and you've got human spike and vampire dru kind of circling one another and flirting but also being freaked out by one another, and however you chose to end the subplot it would be the kind of compelling tragedy that all the best spike stories are. if he choses to become a vampire then you're functionally killing the relationships he would have built with the scoobies by that point, and if he chooses to stay human, you're breaking dru's heart, and basically every other variation i can think of is also tragic, and i love basically all of them

and dru would fucking hate glory, even if you never did the chip subplot in s4 and didn't use human spike to bring her into the group, you could absolutely fold her into the gang in s5 using 'the enemy of my enemy' as the justification

there are so many little problems with buffy that you could fix using dru as a recurring character - the watcher's council functionally only exist when needed, they have no real presence, but they're canonically fascinated with dru and want to experiment on her so they'd have a reason to have a recurring presence in the show that isn't directly related to buffy. vampires have no culture and the one time they were given a religion the writers were too scared to explore it in any depth, but dru is possitioned to interact with the cult of aurelius in a way spike never was, so they might be forced to actually think about the fact that vampires ought to have a unique culture and religious perspective and general outlook on the world. the concept of bisexuality might have to exist. everything with how angel interacts with the gang post s2 would be so much more interesting, and there'd be a reason to bring darla back and give her some character developement. mental health! they'd have to talk about mental health prior to season 6!

i'm not going to write this fic, because it would be so fucking long, but please join me in imagining the au that could have been if buffy comics weren't all terrible, or i had infinite time for writing fic

166 notes - Posted May 27, 2022

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