#i would hate for the theme of her genuinely not giving a fuck about having children against expectations to be undermined

[yuri-puppies]

on the topic of arranged marriages in the post-canon, my dumbest and most inescapable headcanon is that falin and kabru get lavander married

partially out of my love of lavander marriages and the historical tradition of queer men arranging marriages between their lovers and their sisters

and partially because every time i see a labru baby fanart i think "the rumor mill believes that falin and kabru had an affair and the king legitimized his sister's bastard as his heir" and the comedy of errors that would result from trying to cover up kabru's pregnancy/fake falin's is hilarious to me

[missqhughes]

HATE TO WANT YOU | Q. HUGHES43

-> quinn hughes x fem!reader

-> includes: smut with plot, dom!quinn, fingering, unprotected sex, sexual themes, use of y/n, intended lowercase, platonic fem!reader x luke & jack

-> IN WHICH: y/n loves her best friend luke with all her heart, but there’s one person she can’t stand; his brother. she can’t take it anymore; in a confrontation with quinn, he can’t help but drop his facade and give her everything he’s always wanted to.

-> sexxxxyyyy request anon thank you! i too want quinn to hate me and then fuck me senseless. drooling. love it as much as i do! mwah

*fic is not proofread

18+ CONTENT BELOW THE CUT

this wasn’t y/n’s first summer with the hughes brothers.

and it wasn’t her first at the lake house.

ever since they bought it, she’d been there every summer since.

she loved the hughes family, especially her best friend luke. all of them treating her like their own, all except quinn.

and now she stood in the living room, leisurely on her phone, when a rough shoulder shoves past her,

“can you not stand in the middle of hallway? always in the fucking way…” quinn mumbled, ruffling his hair whilst disappearing into the pool room.

y/n scoffed, trying to appear unphased by quinn’s attitude.

quinn had it out for her for so long she couldn’t even remember a time he didn’t act like he hated her. shoving her roughly whenever they all would play together, putting spiders on her body in the summer when he knew she was afraid, and god, all his rude comments galore.

she shook out of her thoughts, making her way to luke’s room, knocking five times to signal to the other that it was them.

“come in!”

she didn’t bother creaking open the door, luke was sitting on his computer playing video games, her flinging herself onto his bed. y/n sighed, causing him to pause his focus and face her,

“what’s wrong? you never just dramatic sigh for nothing.”

she sat up, scrunching her nose before answering, “have you ever noticed… that like… do you think quinn hates me?”

luke gave her a look, “hates you? like genuinely?”

“yes.”

for some corrupt reason in her mind, he started laughing at her question,

“luke! it’s not funny! i’m being serious.”

luke held is stomach, his laughter dying down a bit, “he just treats you like a little sibling that’s all. plus why do you care what quinn thinks? you’ve never brought it up before.”

his words stirred in her brain. sure, she had never mentioned it, but deep down it bothered her and she couldn’t exactly pinpoint why.

because it was just plain rude?

because she couldn’t stand up for herself?

because she found quinn attractive?

thinking about it all made her chest feel weird.

“i don’t care. i mean, i guess i do, i don’t want my best friends brother to hate me for the rest of our lives,” y/n sighs, laying back down on luke’s messy sheets.

he removed his headset and sat next to her, patting her leg affectionately,

“dude you’re fine, i promise he doesn’t hate you, lighten up okay? you’re freaking me out,”

the two giggled softly at his comment, y/n feeling better with luke’s reassurance but not quite. nonetheless, she decided to ignore it.

“sorry, sorry, can’t be mopey here. let’s go down to the dock yeah?”

luke’s smile grew, “race you down there?” he lightly shoved her off his bed, out of his bedroom,

“i’ll beat you to it lukey!”

——————————————————————————

y/n did beat luke down to the dock, only to be met with quinn.

and only quinn.

not even picking up his head to look at her, quinn continued to scroll on his phone as y/n laid her towel down.

“y/n.”

“hello quinn.”

the awkward silence sat between them per usual when this sort of thing happened, when they were finally in a weird position of being alone together. y/n put her sunglasses on, feeling quinn’s glare branding her skin every time he looked at her.

in time to save her, luke ran down, towel and speaker in hand.

“damn it!” he huffed, completely out of breath and throwing his things down next to hers in defeat. she giggled, and saw quinn rolling his eyes out of the corner of hers.

quinn cleared his throat, getting up off the chair, “well now that the peace and quiet is gone, i’m going up. see you guys for dinner.” and with that, he disappeared up to the house.

luke waved off his brother, focused on his phone picking a song. y/n watched until she knew quinn was out of sight, then shoved luke hard in the shoulder,

“shit y/n, what the hell was that for?”

“i told you he hates me. he literally just went up as soon as i came down!”

“dude, he went up because he knew we’re gonna play music and you know how he is. seriously what’s up with you? you’re way too bothered by this.”

she rolled her eyes at him, not really being able to exactly articulate why she felt the way she did. at least not to him.

“i told you already i just don’t want him hating me for the rest of our lives,”

“want me to ask?”

y/n’s eyes widened, shoving luke once more, “no! that’s so embarrassing luke don’t,”

he shoved her back, “then YOU ask him, jesus! ask him after dinner or something,”

she laid on her side, facing him with contemplation in her eyes, he shrugged in response, “doesn’t hurt to say somethin,”

“okay fine, but if i’m totally right then i’m blaming you.”

after soaking up the hot summer sun, y/n and luke retreated back into the house. both exhausted, they parted their ways until dinner.

not another body was sighted in the house, and thinking quinn and jack went to the store, she went down to the kitchen to get a drink, restoring the energy the sun brought out of her.

she grabbed a coke from the fridge, hearing footsteps behind her she turned her head around, and there was quinn.

she all of a sudden felt very exposed in front of him her small bikini, especially alone in the kitchen. it’s different on the dock, you’re not supposed to be wearing barely nothing inside.

she turned her head back, hearing quinn let out a long exhale as he slipped past her, likely annoyed by just her simply being in his vicinity. the tension still stood thick between them, and in the discomfort y/n made a break for her room, not looking back.

——————————————————————————

she tried to get through dinner as normal, but y/n couldn’t control the bouncing in her leg, the anxiety of asking quinn the dreaded question manifesting through the rest of her body.

after everyone was done, her and luke stood beside each other doing dishes, him giving her a slight nudge when quinn left and settled with jack in the living room.

“so are you gonna say something?” he whispered, barely loud enough for her own ears to pick up,

“yeah i will, just not right now. not when there’s an audience,” she said wiping her hands, waiting for luke to finish up.

“you guys wanna watch a movie?” jack’s voice echoed,

“yeah we’re coming!” luke replied, waving her over to walk with him. they sat on the two available chairs, while jack and quinn occupied the couch.

jack had already picked something out, and even though it had just started, she felt eyes peering at her. y/n continued to look over at luke, who was focused on the screen, thinking it was him. she looked over at jack, who was in the same boat as his younger brother, then eventually landing at quinn.

his jaw ever so slightly squeezed tighter when her eyes met his, wandering his piercing eyes to the tv. she shuffled in the chair, attempting to mend the discomfort she felt.

——————————————————————————

with about an hour left of the movie, jack stretched, yawning as he sat up from the couch, “i’m gonna go to bed, i’m exhausted, night everyone,”

everyone said goodnight back as he left, leaving just the three of them behind.

this time, luke was looking over at y/n, and when her glance met his, she saw him looking at the situation in front of him, seeing the idea formulate in his head.

y/n looked at him with a pleading face, begging for him not to put the pressure on her right then and there, but he ignored,

“you guys can finish the movie without me, i’m lowkey really tired too.”

“luke,” y/n began, slightly weary,

“goodnight,” he said quickly, jogging to his bedroom, as fast and as least suspicious as possible. she fell back in the plush chair gently, avoiding even looking in quinn’s direction.

they sat there, she was sure neither of them were even watching, and decided that it was enough,

“can i ask you something?” she breathed out, feeling like the air from her lungs came with her words.

quinn turned his head to look at her, furrowing his eyebrows in confusion, not expecting her to say anything,

“what?”

“why do you not like me?”

the questioned lingered in the air for far longer than she felt okay with. feeling frustrated, she got up, cursing at herself internally for even asking him such a question,

“wait,”

she doesn’t, instead marches straight to her room, not stopping when she hears footsteps behind her.

she gets halfway down the hallway just at the staircase before a gasp leaves y/n’s breath when she feels herself be spun around and pinned onto the wall.

quinn pins her by the hips, eyes staring deep into her own, an unreadable expression on his face.

“you didn’t let me finish.”

“then finish.” she spat back, done with his antics and still embarrassed about leaving her hanging in the living room.

“i was going to say i don’t hate you, before you ran away like a scared little kid.”

she scoffed, not believing a word he said when he just had to throw in an insult in.

“you really expect me to believe that? you’ve done nothing but torn into me since the day we’ve met. i don’t get it, i’ve done nothing to you quinn. nothing.”

he let her words soak into him, taking in all of herself in front of him, admiring it internally.

“it’s not you as a person i hate.” he said, the placement on her hips unwavering,

“so you do hate me,” she kissed her teeth, “then what is it quinn? what do you hate about me that isn’t just me?”

his breathing was hard yet steady, thinking over his next words,

“for one,”

his grip tightened,

“i hate that you’re talking back to me right now,”

y/n’s heart rate picked up,

“i hate how fucking hot you look when you dance around in practically nothing all day,”

his hands moved up slightly,

“i hate how much lukey loves you, how you’re all his and-”

“-luke and i will never be that,” she stopped him, not wanting him, or anyone for that matter, to think her and luke were anything more than friends.

“not what i meant. he gets to spend all this time with you, here there everywhere, and it makes me hate you.”

she felt her heartbeat everywhere in her body, ears hot and arousal seeping through her with his words.

y/n swallowed, “why does that make you hate me?” she whispered, falling into this version of quinn right before her eyes.

“because i hate that i want you, you of all people,” he said lowly, face moving close enough to where their breaths could mingle, crossing territories neither of them have dared to even look at with each other.

“if you don’t like this, tell me. if it’s too much, tell me to stop,” his hands felt around her waist, a different kind of tensions between them now, with only air and opportunity separating them.

“don’t, don’t stop,” she let out, closing her eyes in anticipation for him. and boy, did it come.

quinn’s lips hooked on to hers, primal and eager to explore her mouth. his lips spoke louder than his voice ever could.

y/n’s hands worked their way up from his shirt covered abs to his face, holding it in her hands while he kissed her in a way that told her it wasn’t just her lips he was going to be tasting.

he savored every time his teeth sunk into her plump bottom lip, gently tugging and feeling himself grow harder with the soft noises she let out whenever he did so.

quinn walked them to the couch, and he pulled away to push her down softly, y/n looking at up at him, needy and wanting more. he wasted no time in diving down to kiss her again, his hand finding its way down her shorts.

he smiled devilishly when he was met with a damp spot in her underwear, knowing she was fully soaked underneath,

“already fucking dripping for me huh? m’sure you’ve wanted this,” he mumbled against her lips, feeling her moan on his when he started rubbing her clit through her clothed core.

he pulled away, wanting to see how she looked withering under his teases. y/n’s bottom lip was between her teeth, one of her hands gripping onto quinn’s tshirt,

“mm, quinn, need your hands inside me,”

he knew it too, craving for his fingers to fuck her pussy and make a mess on his hand.

he peeled off her shorts, mouth almost watering seeing her pussy drip through her panties. he moved them to the side, running his ring and middle fingers between her folds before plunging them into her.

y/n covered her mouth, knowing the guttural moan that was going to escape her lips was uncontrollable. her back arched as he curled his fingers, using his thumb to circle her clit at a pace soon to send her over the edge.

her grip on his shirt caused her knuckles to turn white, and he felt her clench around his fingers, close to her release,

“yeah that’s it… cum for me, y/n,”

she panted, legs shaking slightly as the tightness in her stomach loosed, her juices glistening all over his hand as he pumped into her through her high.

quinn brought his hands up to lick his fingers, cleaning her off of them,

“you taste so fucking good, god i need you,”

y/n grabbed the nape of his neck, pulling him in for another kiss, drunken off quinn making her cum so quick.

“fuck me, quinn hughes. fuck me like you hate me.”

those words were enough for him, effortlessly he threw her over his shoulder, grabbing her shorts and carrying her up towards his room, the one place in the house she had never been.

he put her down on his bed, y/n taking in every part of quinn’s room, a sight she had yet to look at.

he was sure as hell neater than luke, little canucks things here and there as well as small things he’s collected over the years. it was cute to her to see the difference in how he acted vs his safe space, even a small teddy bear resting on his dresser.

her mind went back to reality when she heard the door click, quinn turning back to crawl on top of her on his bed.

he slightly pushed her legs apart, y/n hooking them around his waist instinctively, his mouth trailing hot kisses down her jaw and neck.

y/n felt her core growing burning hot, squeezing her legs tight around his waist, desperate for friction on her core.

“you needy huh? turn around.”

y/n obliged, but not before taking off her shirt, whilst facing quinn, seeing his adam’s apple shift when she was left in just a bra and underwear.

she turned around, sticking her ass high in the air for him, quinn admiring her arch pulled her panties down her legs, a bead of arousal following with.

he couldn’t wait any longer, he stripped off all his layers of clothing, pumping his stiff dick leaking with precum before aligning himself with her.

at first he pumped slowly, just to get himself fully inside, but after that he slammed into her, erotic noises emitting from the muffled sheets whilst he fucked her senseless.

quinn groaned at the feeling of y/n around his dick, squeezing it perfectly every time he pounded her in just the right spot.

she gripped his sheets hard, feeling herself come undone underneath him, whimpering into the bed with pleasure.

quinn snaked his around her neck, pulling her up by it and fucking her harder,

“you like it— shit, when i fuck you like this?”

“fuck oh my god, yes quinn, mm,”

he pushed her back into the bed, his thrusts become sloppy and untamed, dick twitching as he let go inside of her, warm release coating the inside of her pussy.

quinn flipped her back over, kissing her cheek before collapsing next to her on the bed, both still buzzing from sex.

“quinn?”

“yeah?” he replied, still trying to catch the rhythm in his lungs,

“i don’t think you hate me anymore,” y/n said, breathlessly laughing as she closed her eyes, also trying to regain herself.

he chuckled softly, handing her clothes back to her before putting on his own.

“as much as i’d like you to stay,” he said, running a hand through his now messed up hair, “you should go back to your room, wouldn’t want lukey having a heart attack seeing you come out of my room in the morning huh?”

she shuddered at just the thought of it, “absolutely not,” she stood up, shaky legs carrying her to his door, quinn right behind,

“but between us, you’ll be back in here tomorrow night.”

——————————————————————————

© missqhughes

xoxo, kaia

[reallyromealone]

Title: hazbin security

Fandom: hazbin hotel

Characters: hazbin hotel ensemble, male reader

Fic type: story - romance

Pairings: angel dust x reader

Warnings: male reader, reader insert, angst, rape themes, reader is a giant, reader is a sweetheart, mentions of nsfw, adult language, mention of kinks, hurt to comfort

Notes: bing bong

🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️

The hotel went quiet as a hulking demon stepped in, having to crouch under he door to enter "uhh, hi?" Charlie said putting on a friendly smile as the 13 foot tall demon stared at her quietly and held up a paper advertisement along with a resume "oh! You're here for the security position!" She said excitedly as the massive demon nodded, everyone too unnerved by his hulking presence to even begin to think about anything else.

Charlie and Alastor went to the back with him, husk looking at angel dust with raised eyebrows as the door closed "holy shit!" Husk said to his close friend who's sipped his martini, nodding "he's a fuckin' giant, seriously! He could crush us!" The spider demon said almost awe struck as he barely hit the demons chest, angel knew he was probably hung like hell... Something he could feel in his stomach.

Charlie busted in "everyone meet our newest security! (Name)!" Charlie introduced the silent demon as the others awkwardly waved to no response as (name) nodded softly, a passive expression on his face.

And that's how it was, everyone went about their days as (name) despite his size lurked quietly in the shadows out of view but angel always kept a keen eye on him, he stressed him out... Reminded him of the people val made him sleep with.

Especially since (name) always glanced at him, like he was suspicious of him... Angel hated it.

"Give me the word, I'll handle him" husk would back up angel dust and the spider demon smiled at his best friend "thanks husky" he smiled, happy he found a genuine friend in the bartender as (name) threw out some crackhead who pissed on the carpet in defiance.

It was late as Angel dust walked to the hotel, exhausted and drained as his heels clicked against the pavement, today was shit and he just wanted to go home...

"Excuse me?" A gravelly voice called as the spider turned to see an imp with an intense glare "you're... You're Angel dust right? I saw your work..." They said seriously and angel felt his hair stand on edge as he looked at the other "what's it to ya?" Angel hissed out as the imp stepped closer and angel stepped back "I really... Admire your work... You look amazing on the big screen though... It pales to the real deal" they said heatedly as Angel felt he needed to get away and fast "no you don't!" The imp hissed out as he grabbed angel dust and pinned him to the ground "I wanna see if you're like how you are on the big screen!" The imp said maniacally as he tore at angels shirt.

Angel felt tears well up in his eyes, fuck he didn't want this to go how it did...

No!

Shit!

"Show me your cute-- holy shit!" The imp was lifted as angel shook, looking at his savior and was surprised when he saw (name) throw the imp like a ragdoll before lifting angel into his arm, the spider secured snuggly in his bicep as he went back to the hotel without a word. Angel was shaking as he just let (name) take him wherever, he didn't care anymore... He just wanted this night to be over.

(Name) Put his sweater over the other, nights in hell we're ice cold and (name) seemed genuinely worried as he took the scared demon back to the hotel. (Name) Didn't speak a word as angel looked up at him fearfully as he processed what happened.

The lobby and the hotel was pretty empty as it was late as everyone was either at home or in their respective rooms, the massive demon just clicking the elevator button as he glanced down at the other before looking forward.

"Wait this isn't..." Oh god, angel panicked as they passed his room and He felt his fears confirmed as they went to (name)s room and he was plopped on the bed unceremoniously, closing his eyes and expecting the worst until a t-shirt handed to him and the white haired demon watched as (name) turned around, Angel realized he gave him one of his massive shirts that fit like a dress. He hid the smile on his face at the fact the massive demon wanted to respect his privacy even though every part of angel had been broadcasted across hell.

But it felt nice... Being respected.

Angel felt awkward as he spoke softly "I'm uh, I'm finished changing big boy" he hoped it wasn't some kink, a lot of demons loved seeing angel in their clothes and fucking like that but was more surprised when (Name) Left the room as angel processed what happened and was elated to see the massive demon gold a tiny piggy in his hand, setting him in angels lap "nuggie!" Angel smiled as (name) sat on the ground, even sitting he held perfect eye contact "thanks... Why did you help me?" Angel didn't get it, no one ever did anything in hell without wanting something in return and (name) tilted his head "why wouldn't I?"

"So do you wanna fuck as a thank you?" Angel asked bluntly and (name) just stared at him "no"

"Then why would you help me if you didn't want to fuck?!"

"You deserve to be treated with respect, i wasn't going to allow such scum to treat you with anything less" the demon grunted, angel realizing that this was the first conversation be ever had with the other, the demons voice soothing to his ears. "you aren't as intimidating as I thought" angel said genuinely as he slid down beside (name), smiling up at him "I intimidated you?" (Name) Seemed genuinely confused and angel cackled "we all were! You're a massive demon who never talks!" (Name) Looked down at his own body and seemed to be in thought "that must be why people run..."

Angel let out a genuine laugh and kissed the others cheek "you ain't intimidating at all anymore to me!" He teased and (name) seemed flustered a bit at the others actions "nuggie seems to like ya" angel said as the tiny piggy crawled into (name)s lap and promptly fell asleep, normally he stuck to angel and angel alone.

"I just admit I have been feeding him little treats, my apologies" (name) seemed embarrassed as angel felt his heart melt a bit, not only was this giant so sweet to him but his pet!

(Name) Let angel sleep in his bed, the demon trying to set up shop on the floor when angel practically forced him on the bed "it's big enough for both of us!" And angel didn't want to sleep alone, the night shaking him up as he snuggled into (name)s side.

Waking up, angel was being held like glass as (name) cuddled him close to his chest as If he were the most precious thing in the world.

Angel didn't want to move, the domestically sweet energy making him feel emotions he wasn't used to.

And god was (name)s chest the most comfortable thing ever, practically smothered by the large pectoral muscles and his massive arms keeping him secure.

Maybe he could close his eyes and enjoy this a little longer...

When (name) woke he gently tucked the spider in as he got out of bed, grabbing a sweater for the other and a pair of boxers for him to wear as he wasn't sure if Angel wanted to wear sleep clothes when he woke...

What he didn't know was angel woke and stared at him curious as the massive demon out together some clothes for him, already dressed for the day and a goody smile played on his face.

He was gonna fuck this demon.

But romantically.

Angel stuck to (name) all day, the bigger demon letting him sit on his shoulder as he went about his day, angel dust talking away as the other listened carefully.

Eventually (name) needed to attend to things as he set angel carefully at the bar and walked off to do whatever it was charlie and Alastor needed him to do.

"So like, you fucking the big guy?" Husk asked bluntly and Angel dust explained what happened, the massive demon being nothing short of a gentleman to the lustful demon "he's only touched me to give me clothes or if I initiated it!" Angel was confused, usually people touch him first and without asking but (name) always looked at him for assurance before doing anything to the white spider, it was nice.

He felt special.

"You deserve someone nice like that, he's always watchin' ya, at first I thought he was glaring but now I think he was worried for ya" it was true, (name) always kept an eye on angel dust and the spider thought (name) was suspicious of him but...

Angel returned to the security demons room that night and (name) looks like a surprised puppy as he let the other in, angel looking up at him expectantly "I wanna fuck you but romantically" angel said simply and (name) tilted his head "you know you don't need to fuck me to be with me" he said simply and angel looked suspicious at him "what? You into cucking?"

(Name) Just lifted the spider and set him in his lap, absolutely tiny comparatively as he turned on the tv and pulled the blanket over them, kissing angel dusts forehead sweetly. Though their relationship seemed a bit rushed, angel couldn't help the goofy smile on his face as he snuggled into (name)s chest, the larger demon kissing his head softly.

Yeah...

He could get used to this.

[creepy-friday]

PLS PLS PLS I NEED MORE PROXY THINGS I KEEP REREADING THE OLD ONES AND U WRITE SO WELL

Sure thing!I noticed a lot of people are rereading the old ones so I promise I will come back with more ideas!

Female!Proxy toughts Headcanons for every creep of the mansion

Warnings: foul language, suggestive themes, violence

Masky thinks he should've been in your place.He wants your attention but at the same time hates your guts.Always wants to pick a fight with you,maybe he's in such a contradiction with himself because your personality softened his sharp edges making him confused.

Hoodie acts all buddy-buddy with you when the two of you aren't on duty.He doesn't hide the way the tension rises from other people's perspective when he talks to you.He's simply curious about who you truly are,an individual like you in such a fucked up place and in such a high position is..intriguing to say at least.

Toby follows your orders and values your presence the most out of the other proxies he's biased. Because he's been taken advantage of many times,your humanity sparked his hope,he thinks that in you he can actually find something heart warming in this hell hole.

Cody is a little annoying at times.Since you didn't shove him off he deeply thinks you're into him,that's why he keeps on inviting you to see the dangerous shit he's creating.

Kate uses every chance she has to imply that you have sexual relationships with the proxies.She's isn't jealous nor wants to take your place,she simply sees herself as slightly superior since she's been here before you.

Jeff has personal issues with every resident near him,including you.He doesn't think of himself as highly as Masky tough.All the mocking and tantrums are because he doesn't belive your good intentions.

Ben is a fucking menace and fucks with your head since he knows you can't physically hurt him.He thinks you're by far the most interesting creep to watch.

EJ respects you.He thinks that you are disgusted by him almost as he is of himself given your role as a demon hunter.His insecurity made him give up any reason to try to talk to you.Watching from afar he knows you're one of the few residents that are still human by heart.

Liu has a very high opinion about yourself.You already proved to be a good person to him when you took EJ's side in an argument with Masky.He would make conversation with you whenever you two are around.

Sully might act like Liu around you so that he can see more of you.Just like other creeps,he fantasies about having a hand to hand spare with you.He talks to you like you're a pice of meat sometimes but he acknowledges your strength.

Slenderman's presence is being known by his general sickness to the other creeps but the fever is high and tormenting when it comes to you.It's clear that he favors you and the fact that he chose you as his watchdog is enough to bring your confidence skyrocket.

Jane watches you from afar.She thinks you're a good fit to be a leader.Surprisingly,she agreed with your every decision and never had anything to add or to take.

Zero is jealous of you and your high status.She despises your guts and would team up with anyone to put you down or to shame you.She's a bitch but I bet she would fuck you tough.She's the "do I want to be her or be with her?"

Clockwork likes how a woman is top shit and she treats you as an equal.Might ask you for your opinion and expects you to listen to hers as well.She thinks you're a good leader.

Nina adores you.You genuinely had a good impact on her mental health and looks up to you.She would be shocked if you would hurt her in any way,after everything she went trough all she needs is a friend.The choice is yours.

Sally thinks that you are really cool and wishes you would take that mask off more often.Since you don't brush her off like the others she's looking forward to talk to you when you're not busy.Confidently slips tea parties invites down your door.

Bloody Painter is mostly indifferent to the power dynamics in the mansion.Sure,he will be respectful to you since that's in his personality but he's apathetic to anything that isn't "aesthetically pleasing".He judges a book by its cover and the ghoul-like design on your mask makes him believe you're no different from the creatures you encounter in the forest.Misunderstanding at its best

[chaengluva]

Dare - 2

Part 2/2

Regina gets dared to date the loser, no one thinks that she could make Y/n fall in love with her, (Resulting in a bet with Shane) Regina ends up doing the unexpected

Warnings: Nothing too extreme, just light bullying and mocking

As the weeks passed, Regina found herself genuinely enjoying your company. The initial dare began to blur as she laughed with you, shared secrets, and experienced genuine moments of connection. You were kind, funny, and smart—qualities that Regina hadn't expected to find in someone she initially labelled as a "loser."

She liked you

You had another date with each other, she took you out to the theme park and you played games and rode on roller-coaster for hours, at the end of the night was when she asked you to be her girlfriend, of course you said yes.

That was 5 months ago and 29 days, Regina dreaded knowing that she had to break your heart soon, but she didn't want to.

You were sitting on your table alone, eating your lunch and patiently waiting for Regina, as soon as she sits down, you speak up. "Can we go out tonight." You ask Regina, looking at her with hopeful eyes, Regina sighs, looking down at her feet, "I'm hanging out with my friends, sorry."

You always thought that it was strange that she never allowed you close to her when her friends were around, you knew about her high status but it still was sad.

"It's okay, I'm watching a movie with my dad anyway." You say, you were hoping that she would come with you, "Maybe it's time, we meet each others parents." You suggest. Regina frowns, knowing that she doesn't want to break your heart because, she loves you.

"My parents are homophobic, I don't think they would want to meet you." Regina lied, she told her parents that she was lesbian a while ago and they expected her but she didn't want for you to form a bond and then be heartbroken so it was easier if she lied. You frowned at first but then you said, "Well maybe you could meet my dad!"

"Yeah, Maybe." Regina said, giving you a kiss, then the bell rang, "I'll see you tomorrow baby." She hated knowing that she would have to break your heart tomorrow or she would have to deal with the embarrassment of her friends making fun of her, she had to spend her time thinking which one she would rather bare.

She made her way into Shanes house and they all smirked at her, Shane and the others pulled her all into the living room and told her to tell them everything., she put on a façade, boasting about how easy it was to fool you. But inside, she was torn. She started dreading the moment when the truth would come out, knowing it would hurt you deeply.

Regina's friends noticed the change in her behaviour. Aaron, in particular, began to suspect that Regina was no longer just playing a game. "You know, if you keep this up, you might actually start caring for her," Aaron teased one afternoon.

Regina scoffed, but her heart wasn't in it. "As if, she's a fucking loser." she replied, rolling her eyes her friends laughed along to Regina's reply, but her heart broke having to talk about you like that.

"Are you ready to break her heart tomorrow?" Shane asked with a smirk, Regina nodded sadly, she wasn't, but she thought that her social status mattered more so she agreed to go along with the original plan.

The next day at school, you had planed to get her a gift for your 6 month anniversary, you got Regina a necklace that you picked out with your dad.

You make your way to Regina, but, your heart breaks when you see her kissing Shane, you walk away before she could see you, but her friends did and everyone of them laughed. "She looked so sad!" Gretchen exclaimed, "She's probably going to cry to her dad." Aaron said.

"I wanna give her a hug." Karen frowned, Regina agreed, that was all she wanted to do but she was stuck next to Shane.

During lunch, Regina made her way up to you, she knew you would try to walk away or not listen, so she had to play it suddenly. "Uh hey Y/n." She whispered, You stood up and tried to walk away but she grabbed your wrist and pulled you down. 

"Don't touch me." You said, she nodded pulling away, "Can I please explain this to you." She says, you throw the necklace you bought her on the table. 

"Explain what? That you got dared to date me then break my heart?" You asked and she stepped back, "Look, I'm really sorry." Regina said again,  but you weren't having any of it, you just stood up and walked away.

The next few days were the worst Regina had ever experienced. You avoided her at all costs, and she felt the loss deeply. She realised she had to make things right, not just for the bet, but for herself and you.

Regina decided to confess everything in front of her friends. She spoke up  when she was sitting on the cafeteria table, drawing everyone's attention. "I have something to say," she began, her voice shaking. She explained the dare, her initial intentions, and how everything changed. "I hurt someone I care about deeply, and I am truly sorry," she finished, looking directly at you. Who happened to be walking by the table and overhearing the conversation.

The table was silent. You were stunned by her confession to her friends, it felt like for once her status  didn't matter. After she told everyone she came up to you, "Hey." She said, "Hi." You smiled.

It took time, but eventually, you forgave her. You saw the sincerity in her eyes and realized that people could change.

Regina and you began anew, this time without any lies or dares. She worked hard to prove her sincerity, and slowly, you started to trust her again. The experience changed Regina, making her more genuine and considerate.

Your relationship grew stronger, built on mutual respect and understanding. Regina's friends saw the change in her and slowly began to accept your place in her life. The bet was long forgotten, replaced by a real, meaningful connection.

Regina learned a valuable lesson about honesty and the importance of genuine connections. She no longer cared about the opinions of those who thrived on petty games. She had found something real with you, and that was worth more than any dare or bet.

In the end, Regina won something far more valuable than $200—she won your heart and discovered her own capacity for true love.

[missingininaction]

alright, friends, i might say something you don't like but i think it's important. not just to defend a character, but because i think this is literally making people's experience and relationship with this game worse.

give jimmy like two seconds to exist.

by hating jimmy so much you refuse to even say his name, and judge real, living people for liking him, you are cheapening your experience by boiling down the main character to the most ~yuckiest~ moments. and, by not making a seperate space for hating on him, you are drowning out the voices of people who actually have nuanced things to say about his character. you know, the skilled writers and artists that feed the fandom? limitation is what kills fandoms, you have to know that.

is jimmy a good person? no. is he a good captain/companion/worker? Absolutely Not! he crumbles like dust under any pressure and he immediately shifts blame off of himself, he is an actively harmful individual and it's right to be upset by his actions. i literally had to stop myself from saying "man FUCK jimmy." multiple times because i didn't want to spoil how terrible he got to my friends when i showed the game to them.

but you have to understand; people are more than their actions. thats part of the entire point of the game. thats why its so abstract. you are meant to think about the nuances of their situation.

we can agree that anya was way more as a woman than what happened to her and what she did as a result of it, right? that despite her best efforts, she was a victim of circumstance, and she deserves to be understood and analyzed fully?

then why, seeing a fictional man who has done immoral things, are you so disgusted you won't even draw, write or discuss him outside of hate? what is that doing for you, to ignore literally the main character of the game because of his actions?

now, this is not to say people can't hate jimmy. i understand it! as someone who has been a victim of s/a and abuse, i understand if you hate him and are even triggered by him to the point of avoiding mention of him. (but...why are you in this fandom? ((not aggressive im genuinely asking)))

you can feel however you want about any character, my goal is not to control people. but i thought it was common knowledge to not hatepost about someone in their tag? over actual insight into his character and, you know, the main themes of the game?

jimmy is a man who has struggled his whole life. both him and curly confirm that in the game. he's unable to control his emotional outbursts, and he likely had no idea what to expect from being in fucking SPACE for over a year with people he probably didn't even know before that trip. and pony express and their corporate safety corner cutting certainly didnt help, did it?

for one reason or another, he most likely was never actually taught how to manage his emotions. that's just how it is sometimes, growing up as a man. and it would make sense if he was forced to deal with everything himself, no? he always complains, but he still says he'll handle it. because that's what he's always had to do. and this is just the start of what i could say about what made him the way that he is.

he's a victim too, not only of his own actions.

surprise surprise, people who do awful things can also be victims.

honestly, this entire situation baffles me. how are you going to avoid one of the main characters of the game, let alone the one you play as ninety percent of the time? mind you, curly is also guilty, and i am happy to see at least some people giving him space for nuance. because he is also a victim!!! why is it so impossible to see jimmy as nuanced, when literally every other character also has incredible depth to them??

you're tarnishing and spitting on the beautiful writing of this game just because one character is too icky for you to feel comfortable thinking about for too long. it's horror, you absolute morons. it's supposed to make you uncomfortable.

if you hate jimmy, i dont blame you. but please, please, make your own space for it. be kind to people who want to explore jimmy and the darker themes, and like him for what his character represents. this is a video game fandom, not a witch hunt. and please, learn some fandom etiquette while you're at it, okay? okay. thank you

also just say his name. its not a slur youre not gonna go to hell if you say jimmy. like this isn't as important but still it just feels like a microcosm of this whole thing.

[trippinsorrows]

looking through your eyes + seven

authors notes: so this one leaves probably more questions than answers, but there's also a lot of things sprinkled throughout, and all questions will be answered....eventually.

if any cw/tw’s are missed, please let me know, and i will add them!

cw/tw: fluff, language, discussion of parental loss, brief (two line) flashback of aftermatch following csa, suggestive themes, ptsd trigger

song inspo: ‘looking through your eyes’ by leann rimes

masterlist

words: 8k

Solana: Are you busy today?

Normally, Roman would keep his phone face down during business meetings but with increasing communication with Solana, he’s leaned more on the side of having it face up so he’s aware when notifications come through. 

It’s not a priority. Just a…..preference. 

Grabbing his phone, he quickly shoots her back a text.

Roman: What do you need?

Before he can put his phone back down, those three dots appear. He keeps the thread open for her reply to slide in.

Solana: Nvm. I’m sorry to bother you.

Roman curses inwardly, barely keeping it to himself and not making the room of men aware of his frustrations. He can acknowledge Solana has slightly improved with her over–apologizing over the past couple weeks, but it’s moments like this that get him upset all over again. 

He fucking hates repeating himself.

But….

There’s that small, annoying ass, nagging voice in the back of his head that reminds him of why she’s always so apologetic, why she thinks her damn existence itself is an inconvenience. And he can’t really fault her, blame her for years of trauma fucking with her mental.

Roman: You’re apologizing again. How many times I gotta tell you to stop that shit?

It could probably, definitely, be worded better. Maybe even a bit…kinder. But Roman is a lot of things. 

Kind is not one of them.

He then adds, knowing she’ll probably try to find another excuse to not be honest with him. 

Roman: What do you need? The truth, Solana. 

There’s an appearance and disappearance of those dots at least three or four times. He can picture her biting down on her bottom lip as she tries to word what probably is a simple request as best she can.

The amount of overthinking she does has to be fucking exhausting.

Solana: I was just gonna see if you could meet me at the library. I wanted to show you something.

Solana: But, it’s not a big deal! Please forget I said anything.

A couple of things strike Roman strange, two in particular. The first being that as soon as she says what she needs, the answer is an automatic yes. Like, it’s not even something he really thinks too much about, but he also chalks it up to a level of genuine curiosity. This might be the first time she’s actually directly asked him for something.

It must be important. Important enough for her to ask him to come see whatever it is, at least.

It’s why he doesn’t even comment on her second, follow up text.

Roman: What time you get off?

He can make whatever work.

Solana: It’s okay. Really.

This damn girl….

Roman’s jaw clench as he types out a text that matches his mood. 

Roman: Solana….

She’s giving him a damn migraine. He’s not sure why he doesn’t just ignore her at this point. If it’s that fucking important, she wouldn’t be giving him such a hard time.

But then the stupid nagging voice returns, reminding him that her even asking in the first place is a huge deal that shouldn’t necessarily be shot down because of lingering struggles that are probably going to be around for a while.

Solana literally has years of baggage and trauma she needs to heal from.

And that shit doesn’t happen overnight.

Solana: 3pm

Roman blows out a breath. Fucking finally. 

He lays his phone back down, not necessarily wanting to hear any pushback or counter arguments she might try to supply, fake ass reasons she wants to back away from her assertive request. 

Not happening. 

Roman: I’ll be there.

“Jey.” Roman’s deep voice cuts through the group who set their eyes on him. “I need you and Jimmy to handle the Barrett meeting for me.”  While the twins are annoying as shit majority of the time, they’re effective all of the time. Roman has trusted countless meetings with them, and none have turned out badly. They always get shit handled. 

His cousins both echo okayness with this change in plans, as expected. The same way Roman expected his Wise Man to be the one with questions.

“My Tribal Chief, we’ve had this meeting scheduled for weeks. What could possibly be more important?”

It’s a fair question, Roman isn’t too stubborn to admit that. But, it’s also not a question that applies. Again, it’s not that Solana is important, per se, it’s just that if his alternative is dealing with Barret’s loquacious business dealings, he’d prefer Solana.

He’s also partially intrigued by the mere fact she’d even had the balls to ask something of him in the first place. It’s promising. Assertiveness has always been more attractive to him than passiveness. 

Roman’s answer is both simple and vague. “I have somewhere to be.”

“But—”

“Wise Man.”

Paul’s childlike smile deepens suddenly, as if he’s been picked to be fucking line leader. “Yes, my Tribal Chief?”

“Who’s the Tribal Chief?”

Rikishi is the only one to offer a visible reaction, hiding his chuckle. He knows exactly where this is going, even if his decades old friend does not. 

“Y–you are, my Tribal Chief.”

Romans voice is sharp and lethal. “So why the fuck are you asking me to answer to you?”

Paul’s expression pales. “I would never, my—”

“Sound like it to me,” Jimmy’s messy ass chimes in. He looks at Jey. “What you think, Uce?”

“Sound like it to me too.” Jey, as expected, agrees. Only for him to nearly fall back in his seat when he jumps up so both feet are on the expensive ass leather. Roman is annoyed all over again for a new reason. “Ayo, Uce, ya’ll got a rat problem!”

At that, Jimmy is twinning with his brother in more than just appearance, also with his feet off the floor and onto the leather chair. Roman hopes they both fall over and break their goddamn necks. Rikishi can handle Barrett just fine.

“Ain’t you like a goddamn billionaire? How the hell you got Stuart Little and his fam running around your crib!”

Roman’s gaze follows the line of vision the twins are so damn focused on only to be met with Dulce calmly walking past both of them to sit in front of him, looking up with a tilted head. 

She’s clearly looking for Solana. 

And he knows this because it’s become a bit of a habit. If he’s home and she’s not, Dulce’s nosy ass seems to seek him out as if he’s supposed to magically make her owner appear. It’s not something he’s brought up to Solana, because he knows she would just freak the fuck out and over apologize for Dulce “bothering” him. 

And that’s not the case. 

It’s a bit annoying, but it’s not a bother.

His staff keep an eye out for her when Solana works, and he’s even seen Solana come back to the house on her lunch breaks to check in Dulce, so he doesn’t mind. She’s keeping up her end of the deal, being the primary caretaker for the puppy. 

“That’s Solana’s dog.”

Jimmy’s bewildered gaze is on him. “This a dog?”

“Yes.”

“You let her get a dog? Like a real ass dog?”

“You fucking see her, don’t you?” At that moment, Dulce calmly lays down on the floor next to Roman’s feet which are literally bigger than her small ass. It’s followed up by Paul starting to sneeze. 

Jey, who is now sitting back in his chair like a normal human being, points out, “man, you hate dogs.”

Naturally, Roman goes a bit on the defense, shoulders straightening. “I don’t hate them.”

Jimmy makes a sound, also with his feet planted on the ground. “Bruh, you literally use to tell us when we was growing up, ‘I hate dogs.’ That’s why we started calling you Big Dog, cause it was funny to see you get all mad and shit.”

Roman may or may not remember that, but it doesn’t mean he’s going to acknowledge it. Besides, he’s allowed to change his mind. Hate was always probably too strong of a word to use anyway. 

There are a lot of things Roman hates, even more people that he hates, but dogs are not on the list. 

It was more irritation than anything.

“Whatever.”

“What’s her name?” Rikishi asks, bending over his chair to try to catch Dulce’s attention.

Roman watches the puppy gradually make her way over his cousin, ears dropping as he gently rubs the top of her head. “Dulce.”

“Dul–what?”

This…..this is why Roman is on high blood pressure medication, why Dr. Michaels recommended he start wearing one of those smart watches to monitor his heart rate and other shit. Not that he did it.

“Dulce. It’s Spanish.”

“Aw man, why you ain’t say that in the beginning?” Jimmy turns to Jey. “The dog only speak Spanish.” He looks over at his dad who now has Dulce in his lap, continuing to pet her. Roman rolls his eyes. This dog is a damn attention whore, just like he predicted. “Hola, lil’ chalupa.”

Jey punches his brother on the arm. “Uce, you can’t be saying that kind of shit. It’s racist.”

“No, it’d be racist if I called the dog Taco Bell since her mama half Mexican, but I ain’t do that shit, cause I like Soso.”

“Stop calling her that.” 

Jimmy avoids Roman’s warning and proceeds to ask with all of the intrigue. “So not only did you let her bring a dog up in here, but you let ole’ girl pick a rat for said dog?”

Already irritated and on edge, Roman isn’t sure why Jimmy’s question irritates him as much as it does, and not even because it's a question that’s being posed when he’s trying to review a contract. It’s that Jimmy is questioning Solana’s decision in general.

He answers as calmly as he’s capable of responding. Roman also notices that Paul is red as a tomato as he pulls out an Epipen. Roman easily brings his focus back to Jimmy. “It’s what she wanted.”

“Should have got a big dog,” Jey suggests, hovering over by Rikishi as he tries to interact with Dulce whose eyes are fluttering closed. Roman swears this damn dog sleeps 23 out of the 24 hours in the day. 

That answer is simple, Roman grabbing a pen to sign off on the contract in front of him. It’s satisfactory enough. “She’s scared of them.”

“What is she not scared of?”

But that comment, for whatever reason, is what makes him snap. “Get out.”

Both the twins are unfazed, but it seems to trigger something for them as Jimmy exclaims, “I forgot!” He looks over at Jey, reminding. “Remember, Soso made some extra food for us.”

“Oh shit, she sho’ did!” 

Roman makes a mental note to write Solana about that. It’s not her job to keep feeding his grown ass, married ass cousins. 

The two bid their farewell, Jey shouting out as his parting term, “yeet!”

“Stop doing that,” Roman calls after their retreating forms as Paul also excuses himself for some air. 

Maybe he really is allergic to dogs. 

Rikishi stands up and walks over to him, still holding Dulce but not saying anything. He’s just looking like he wants to say something. Another of Roman’s pet peeves, of the many.

With a mutter and scowl, he asks, “what?” 

His cousin simply shrugs, nonchalantly commenting. “The girl is growing on you, Uce.” It’s an assessment, for certain.

However, Roman has zero desire to have this conversation with his older cousin, or anyone, in general. Hence, his vague ass reply of, “she’s tolerable.”

Because that’s the truth. Solana is neither amazing nor insufferable. She’s in a pretty balanced space between the both: tolerable.

Rikishi gives him that sly ass look that makes Roman want to punch him in his fucking face. “E tua le fale tele i le faleo’ o.”

It’s an old Samoan proverb that means “Even the mighty need others.”

Instantly, Roman’s gaze is cutting. “I don’t need anyone.” He never has, and he never will.

Rikishi just offers a knowing smile, lowering Dulce back to the ground and placing a hand on Roman’s shoulder, giving a gentle squeeze. “Of course not, Uce. Of course not.” The older man says nothing else, just walking out, Dulce returning back to stand by Roman’s feet, head up, staring at him.

He rolls his eyes, murmuring as he gets back to work. “She’ll be home later.” 

Dulce barks in response. 

________

The minute Roman pulls up to Solana’s job, sees the expression on his cousin’s face, he knows something is up.

Solo may have a dangerously good poker face, but Roman invented that shit. 

He got the blueprint from Roman. 

Solana is sitting near the front of the building, surrounded by fucking children as she reads some basic ass book that they’re all clearly eating up based upon how they can’t seem to take their eyes off her.

Roman isn’t entirely indifferent, instantly taking note of her outfit, more colorful, less covered. It reeks of Naomi’s influence, but in a good way. 

As always, she looks good, better than good.

Not wanting to interrupt, Roman motions for a few of his men to take Solo’s place as he gestures for his younger cousin to follow him.

As soon as they’re outside the building, Roman gets right into it. “You got something to say, so say it.” 

Roman knows his cousin well enough to know that despite his brutal fighting abilities, the man is always careful and meticulous with his words. Unlike his hot headed older brother, Jey, Solo always thinks before he acts.

It’s why Roman doesn’t think twice about the space between the issuance of his prompt and Solo’s answer.

“You made me your enforcer for a reason, yeah?”

It’s an easy answer. “Yes.” 

“You upped me in the ranks to prove myself, right? To earn my way into the inner circle?”

Roman is already bored with the conversation, but considering this is family, he throws a bone. “Yeah.”

“So just how am I supposed to do that when you got me playing babysitter to your new wife?” The turn in topics as well as increase in Solo’s volume does slightly, very slightly, take Roman by surprise. Granted, he does a masterful job, as always, hiding that surprise. “Any lower guy could do this shit. She don’t—”

“Solo.” Roman gives him that tight smile and scratches his beard, typically the last thing people see before they meet their maker. “You answer to me. You do what I say you do, and I say you’re assigned to Solana.”

Roman doesn’t know what’s in the fucking water for people to be testing him the way they are, but it’s really starting to piss him off.

Solo looks down, clearly embarrassed by this talk down but not enough to shut his mouth. “I get that, but—”

“Wasn’t she already hurt once under your watch?” Roman’s voice is razor sharp as he reminds the younger man of his failure. The memory of that fucking bruise on Solana’s wrist from her bitch of a brother returning all of those strong emotions. “I gave you a job, and you didn’t do it. She got hurt while under your protection. It’s because you’re my cousin, you're even still breathing right now. You know better than anyone I don’t accept failure.”

At that, Solo concedes, knowing good and well there is no excuse or justifiable reason. “I understand, my Tribal Chief.”

Roman does his best to chip away some of his anger at this outright disrespect as well as the memories of Solana hurt. He steps past his cousin, calling out over his shoulder. “And Solo, don’t think because you’re family I won’t put a bullet in your head for questioning me.” Out of the corner of his eye, Roman can see Solo still has his head down. “Fail me again, let her get hurt again, and I’ll put your ass six feet under.”

Roman doesn’t allow the conversation to persist beyond that, big steps taking him back to the library just in time to see the children disperse, whipping past him as Solana approaches. The wedges on her feet give her a bit more height, but he still towers over her, which is a usual experience for him.

But, it doesn’t negate the fact that she’s so damn small.

“Hi,” she greets in that familiar unsure voice, eyes darting from him to the ground. “Sorry—I mean—story time ran a bit over.”

He’s appreciative she at least caught the apologizing before he had to call it out. “It’s fine.”

She offers a tight smile and motions for him to follow her, which he does, just as his eyes follow the sway of her ass as she leads the way.  

He’s starting to really enjoy seeing her in jeans. 

She leads him up the stairs and in the back area he’d visited her before what seems like so long ago, finding that her bastard of a brother had manipulated her into being alone with him. The last fucking time that shit will ever happen.

She pulls a key out her back pocket and unlocks the door, informing, “I have to grab something first.”

He doesn’t say anything, just nods. It’s like she feels the need to justify every little thing she does. 

Roman watches her walk over to the desk, leaning over as she grabs him something out of her bag, a notebook, the journal he first found her writing in the first time he came to see her at her place of employment. 

She’s back by him, closing and locking the door. “Come on.”

Typically, if this was anyone else, Roman would have demanded to know just what the fuck was so important that caused him to have to rearrange his whole schedule. Granted, he can’t take that out on her, nor would he ever, when he’s the one who rearranged his whole schedule for her. She didn't ask him to do that shit. 

He did it on his own volition for reasons unknown. 

The walk to the next stop doesn’t take long at all, Solana soon sticks her key in another, unfamiliar door, opening and stepping aside but directing him to walk in.

He does as such, naturally and instantly taking in his surroundings once she hits the light switch. It’s a room obviously, a previous storage room he would guess based upon the large filing cabinet lined against the wall to the right of him. There’s also another couple pieces of furniture against that same wall, like a desk and mini bookshelf, but that’s not what immediately catches his attention.

He’s instead more interested by the remaining walls that are essentially lined with larger, white bookshelves, all filled with a combination of notebooks, books, and journals. Completely filled. 

Intrigued but also confused, the latter of which is unfamiliar to him, Roman turns to Solana, asking, “what is this?”

Her cheeks redden, but she manages an answer that’s somehow not marked by as much stuttering. “There are all my journals—well,” she stops, giving a nervous laugh. “Most of them. Some are books I’ve read, and….” She walks over to a section that somehow seems different from the others, albeit lined up neatly with the rest of the items. Solana’s hand almost hesitantly feathers over the spines of the journals. At closer look, Roman can see they’re a bit dated and worn than the others. “These were my mother’s.”

Her answer surprises him, but he quickly recalls her sharing that she started writing because of her mother, because they wrote to each other.

She clears her throat and then turns back to him, sharing, “every time I finish a journal, I leave it here.”

Obviously. “Why here?”

“My mom started it. It—it was an arrangement she had with Mrs. Jensen. She worked here, and along with her pay, she arranged so she could keep her writings here and after….” Solana starts to hesitate, and Roman can see it’s because emotion is brewing. Just gently bubbling under the surface. “After she died, I kept up with it.”

Roman recognizes the sensitive nature of the subject and makes a subtle effort to change the topic on her behalf. “You’ve really written in all of these?” It’s impressive. He has to give her that. The thought of writing in general has never appealed to him, so for her to have a room full of journals she’s completed is fucking impressive. 

She nods, adding sheepishly, “filled em’ up.” Solana then takes the one in her hand, lifting it a bit. “Finished this one this morning.” He watches her squeeze it into a row that’s probably already being pushed to the limit.

She’s going to run out of space eventually.

She’ll need something bigger, sooner rather than later. Roman compartmentalizes this for a later date and time to navigate.

“You keep em’ here to hide them also, don’t you?”

“They can never know what I’ve written….” She doesn’t need to say who they are. It’s more than obvious. It’d be a sure death wish. “I just—-I know you said you’d write for now and it’s been almost a month, but—but I—I figured if you knew just how important and helpful writing is to me—”

“Solana.” There’s no need for her long ass, drawn out explanation. He understands now why she wanted him to see this space, the goal behind the request. “We’ll write as long as you need it.”

He watches her shoulders drop, a sign of relief. She bites back a smile he wouldn’t be opposed at seeing. She looks even better when she’s smiling. “Thank you.”

He only nods, and Solana finds herself taking him in. 

All of him.

In recent weeks, she’s discovered yet another newfound difficulty and source of anxiety for herself. And that new addition would happen to be in the form of the 6’3 man before her.

Roman has always made her nervous, for a variety of good and valid reasons, but recently, the cause of that anxiety has shifted to something else, something a bit on the unfamiliar side for her, or rather something she hasn’t really had to think about since her last disastrous relationship.

Attraction

Solana has come to terms with the fact that she’s attracted to Roman, yes, but also that she hasn’t the slightest clue of what to do about and with that said attraction.

It’s always been there, to a certain extent, but it was more dormant, something she knew was present but voiceless and nameless, almost invisible.

Now, in interacting and engaging with him more, it’s formed more defining characteristics, creating a sense of butterflies in her stomach whenever his smoldering gaze falls on her or when he says something to her, that deep, baritone voice sprouting goosebumps on the back of her neck.

It also doesn’t help that he’s indicated a couple of different times now that he also finds her attractive, or pretty, beautiful even.

That he thinks she looks good.

None of that makes sense to Solana nor can she understand why he would believe any of those things, but she would never make him out to be a liar, so it must be true, to some extent.

And therein lies the dilemma. 

One of many that exist in her life.

How she’s supposed to balance attraction with fear, desire with aversion, peace with trauma. It’s all a muddled mess. 

“Solana.”

“Sorry.” He only has to sigh one time for her shoulders to sulk, but instead of apologizing, she points out in a small voice. “It’s—it’s a habit.”

“Yeah, well, it’s a fucking habit to break.” His irritation is palpable, and Solana feels even smaller around him, like she’s done something wrong. “It’s not you I’m annoyed with.”

“Oh.” And that genuinely surprises her. In Solana’s experience, she’s always been the source of people’s, especially the men in her life, exasperation. But before she can step out of her comfort zone and ask him what’s wrong, he informs her of something that completely makes her emotions flip and twirl into a puddle of distress.

“Your father called for you today.” And just like that, any sense of relation and ease she’d achieved is dissipated, replaced with growing unrest. “Relax…” It’s not missed upon Solana how Roman’s tone quickly and almost easily jumps from irritated to almost soothing, like he’s trying to calm his nerves. “I told him to fuck off.”

That doesn’t make her feel any better. “He doesn’t like being told no.”

“And you think I give a fuck?” His deep voice is full of indifference and edge, but this time around, Solana knows it’s not directed towards her. He then asks, “do you want to talk to him?”

It takes her off guard. “What?”

Roman repeats himself with a surprising lack of irritation. “Do you want to talk to him?” 

Solana can’t remember the last time she was asked such a question. Been given a choice. Then again, it’s happened quite a few times since her marriage to Roman, starting with Bayley asking her something as simple as how she wants her makeup done. 

She doesn’t know what to make of that. Just another thing added to that mounting list of confusing and conflicting thoughts and feelings. 

“If you want to, I’ll allow it.” He quickly adds the caveat. “But not without me present.”

Prior to the past couple weeks, Solana would suspect Roman’s stipulation stems from a place of possessiveness. But now….now it feels like it comes from someplace else, something so unfamiliar and foreign. 

Protectiveness. 

It feels like he’s being protective of her. 

His proclamation from earlier returns to the forefront of her mind.

“I’m not going to let anyone lay a fucking hand on you.”

He’d also included a list of people he wouldn’t allow to do as such, including her dad and brother, which is why he clearly would only let Solana speak to her father if he’s around. 

It’s just the why that has her stumped.

But, back to the question being posed, the easiest and most simple answer is no. She’d rather not be around someone who’s only ever left her hurt, emotionally and/or physically. Or allocated that task to her brother. 

Not to mention the fact that the only reason he probably wants to talk to her is to discuss this nefarious plot she still refuses to allow herself to think about because it’s so inconceivable. 

“Not really,” she answers after what feels like forever, “but…”

Roman picks up on her hesitation. “But?” 

“Like I said, my–my father doesn’t like being denied.” And before he can protest or again reiterate his outright indifference to her father’s feelings, Solana adds in a quiet voice, “and I usually end up being the one to pay for it.”

Roman steps towards her, and before she can process what’s happening, his finger is under her chin, tugging so that her head is lifted, eyes locked with his. 

His voice lowers, quietly asking, “you still don’t believe me when I say I won’t let anyone hurt you, huh?” It’s rhetorical, sure, but Solana is too focused on the fact that this man is touching her. It’s as innocent as innocent comes, but it’s still touch, something she usually hides away from like the plague. However, outside of the initial shock and borderline discomfort, Solana doesn’t jump away, doesn’t feel the need to put as much distance between them. She’s almost….almost comfortable.

“I’m going to kill them both, eventually.  Fucking with them in the meanwhile only makes the outcome that much more worthwhile. But…” And the surprises keep coming, especially as he makes her aware of his intentions. “One word. All I need is one fucking word from you. That you want them gone, and it’s done. No questions asked.” 

Power.

Solana wonders if this is what power feels like, the ability to say one single word and have a life be ended. How she feels about those lives belonging to her brother and father remains to be seen, but even being given such an option, such an almost promise, it’s an indescribable experience.

Roman’s brown eyes, light and contrasting everything about him that is sharp and hard, study her. “You understand me?”

Naturally, she nods against his index finger that’s under her chin, demanding maintained eye contact. 

“I need words.” It’s a reminder from the infamous wedding night, something that seems so far in the rearview mirror now. 

“Y–yes.”

He seems pleased by this acknowledgment, enough to pull his hand away from her, Solana trying not to make too much of the strange sensation that floats in her stomach at the absence of his touch. 

Roman suddenly offers. “If it makes you feel better, I’ll up your security detail.” Before she can protest and probably apologize if she’d unintentionally indicated it wasn’t already enough, he asks, “you get off at 3 every day?”

“Essentially, y–yes.” 

“I’ll start meeting you.”

The surprises just keep on coming.

Instantly, she feels bad, shaking her head. “You don’t have to—”

“Solana.” This man must get tired of having to say her name, she’s certain of that. “I’ll meet you.” He says the same thing, but this time, she knows not to push back because it’s a done thing. “Just make sure I have your updated work schedule.”

“Wh—what about Solo?”

“He’ll still be assigned to you for any other outings.” This makes her feel a little better, that he’s not entirely rearranging and inconveniencing himself for her. “You ready to go?”

Yes. No. Maybe. There’s so many different questions she has with only a select number of answers, but in this moment, she goes with the one that feels most right. 

Especially with Roman reaching for her hand.

Nodding, she swallows and accepts his gesture, noticing how his large hand closes over hers, almost protectively.

“Yes.”

________

“That for me?” Solana looks up from the notebook she’s almost certain she’ll have filled and completed by the end of the month. Roman’s presence and question both catch her off-guard. She didn’t really expect to speak to him again today, especially after he already spent time with her earlier that day. She figured he’d had his maximum daily dosage. 

Especially after she’d already prepared and fixed dinner for him, the two of them falling into their now routine of him eating in his office, her in the living room before she makes her way out back to the patio where she either writes or, now, plays with Dulce.

Solana shakes her head, answering softly as Roman sits on the chair opposite her.  “no. It’s…”

“About your mom?”

With him now aware of the nature of some of her writing, she answers, “yeah.” Roman’s question triggers something she’s certain she intentionally never commented on because it was such a shock to her system that she really didn’t know how to respond. “When….when you said it wasn’t my fault….did—did you mean that?”

If she expected there to be delayed response or even confusion on his end, she was entirely wrong because he answers almost on the spot. “Yes. I told you, I wouldn’t lie to you.”

She’s starting to believe that. 

Wetting her lips, she informs in that same small voice, “no one’s ever said that to me before.”

Xavier’s unshaven face and dark, judgmental gaze is focused on her, Solana doing her best to ignore the pain that wrecks her body, the beeping of the machines and IV’s in both her arms. The throbbing between her legs is equally scary as it is confusing. What did they do to her, and why did it hurt so much?

He pulls the cigar from his mouth, dropping and stomping it on the floor, gruff voice asking, “why didn’t you fight back?” He shakes his head, spitting at the same spot that’s littered with remnants of one of many poor habits. “You’re weak just like your mother.”

Roman’s firm voice snatches her away from spiraling too deeply in dark memories of an even darker past. She does her best to shake away any sign she was about to dissociate when he surprises her for what feels like the 10th time today, almost quietly sharing, “My mother was killed when I was ten years old.” There’s a synchronous dropping of her mouth and stomach at the exact same time. “You think that shit was my fault?”

The answer is obvious and immediate. “No. Of–of course not. You were—you were just a kid.”

While her response is borderline automatic, coming from a place of pure logic, everything else is so confusing. Roman’s mother is….dead? Not even dead but murdered when he was a child?

Just like hers.

Solana doesn’t know how to process this. It’s not until this very moment that she realizes not once has she ever considered or thought about his immediate family, like parents and even siblings. At the wedding, so many people were present, obvious family members of his, but she’s just now realizing she never considered who was who. Were they all cousins, aunts, in-laws even? 

Where is the rest of his immediate family? Better yet, who makes up his immediate family? She’s aware of the twins and even his older cousin Rikishi, but is there not more?

“So were you.” She can’t tell if Roman intentionally works to redirect the focus back onto herself or if he’s unaware of the fact she’s suddenly wondering just how much about the man across from her she still knows nothing about it. “So why is it different for you?”

It’s an effective diversion and valid question that she’s never once asked herself.

“No one’s ever said that either.” Her voice is only a couple octaves above a whisper, and Solana finds herself sharing more than she’s probably ever divulged to anyone. “When I….when I’m writing, a lot of the times, I’m writing letters to my mom.” Having this conversation with anyone, let alone Roman, of all people, wasn’t on her life agenda. But, it seems like a lot of ‘nevers’ are gradually morphing into ‘actualities.’

It’s such a strange experience, too.

“Like I said, we used to write to each other, and after….after she was killed, I couldn’t find it in me to stop. I think at the beginning, I kept doing it because….because I didn’t want to accept she was gone.” The understanding and underlying emotion shifts to the surface, resulting in her quickly wiping at her eyes to keep the tears from falling. “Like I was waiting for her to write me back.” It’s not missed upon Solana how Dulce suddenly moves closer, tucking her body right up against Solana’s thigh. “And I’ve kept at it over the years, cause—she was the only person I could ever talk to.”

Roman repeats the same message he wrote to her, almost reminding her of a lifeline she’s gradually starting to realize is available for the first time in almost twenty years. “You can talk to me, Solana.”

And she is. She doesn’t know how and especially why, but she is, and as heavy as the topic is, there’s a hint of relief at finally having another living, breathing person to speak to and with about these things. 

Especially…..especially someone who can maybe relate to her. “How did you do it—how did you….move past it?”

It’s not the best wording, she’s certain of that. Losing a parent. Having a parent be murdered isn’t something one gets over. 

Solana knows this better than most, but Roman….he’s so composed, so together, so unbroken. 

So unlike her. 

His expression darkens as he answers in an eerie but calm voice. “I got my revenge, and I killed every single son of a bitch who played a role.” His delivery unsettles her a bit, but he seems to easily shift back into that almost patient tone she’s only ever heard him use….with her. “But, I’m not like you, Solana. You're innocent. My ledger bleeds red.” Solana doesn’t know what it looks or even sounds like for Roman to be uncomfortable, but his delivery in the next part definitely feels as such.  “I don’t….feel things like you do. You feel everything. I feel nothing.”

She whispers. “I wish I was like that, that I didn’t feel.” Because it’s true. Because it’s how she initially started to self harm, because she wanted to feel something other than emotional pain. Even physical pain was better than the anguish that racked her every day, 24/7.

He’s quick to shut that down, to tell her the complete opposite. “No, you don’t. That would mean you’ve lost that innocence you have.”

That actually makes Solana smile, chuckle, but there’s not an ounce of humor as she shakes her head. “I–I lost my innocence a long time ago.” Stolen. It was stolen from her a long time ago is the more appropriate way to word it. Stomach a complete freaking mess, she does her best to power through her anxiety at what she’s about to tell him. “Roman…..I—”

“Ayo, Uce—”

“What!” Roman snaps, Solana jumping back away from him, hypervigilance back on high and alert. He briefly casts his gaze back in her direction, and she can almost swear she sees a speck of guilt. Like he’s apologetic for scaring her. 

Jimmy, however, is unfazed by his cousin’s temper. He’s lived with it his whole life. Ain’t nothing new. “Rhodes men were on Bloodline territory—”

“What?” At that, Roman’s head snaps back in Jimmy’s direction. And Solana watches as any sign of Roman, patient and almost kind, is replaced almost instantly with that same cold, stoic demeanor that could strike fear in the heart of even the strongest man. 

He stands up, hands on his hips as he moves a bit away from her. Solana also stands, fighting her urge to move closer to him. 

Jimmy also presents with a seriousness she’s never seen in him, never even really knew he was capable of, to be honest. “We got three guys down. Another two critically injured.”

Roman curses, turning away, back toward Jimmy and her. He then asks, “you got a location on em’ yet?”

“Pearce should have it any minute now.”

“Good. Let’s go.” Roman nods, stepping away from Solana and in the direction of Jimmy just as Dulce walks over, clearly wanting Solana to pick her up. She must also pick up on the sudden shift in the atmosphere. 

Dulce in her arms, Solana finds herself calling for Roman. “What—”

“Not now.” His dismissal is sharp and sudden. It shouldn’t hurt her feelings, because it’s obvious he’s in an entirely different zone now, but it does. 

Solana sinks back into her shell of silence as Solo steps forward. “You want me—”

“Stay with Solana. She doesn't step foot outside this fucking house, you understand me?” Roman’s orders are indisputable, an almost sense of urgency in his tone. “Heighten security around the premises.”

Solana has so many questions. Just what is going on? Why is Roman so on edge all of a sudden? Who is Rhodes and why do they present such an imminent threat where Roman marches out the house, Jimmy on his heels without even a second glance at her.

It’s all so confusing. 

“You need to get inside.” Solo’s equally stoic reminder, command maybe, pulls her from her thoughts. And Dulce suddenly growling at Solo definitely redirects her focus.

“Shhh. It’s just Solo,” she comforts, petting and trying to calm the puppy who quickly upgrades her growling to barking. This also confuses the mess out of Solana.  

She’s not sure she’s ever seen Dulce both growl and bark at someone.

Wordlessly, she walks in the house, past Solo who she notices makes sure to lock the door behind them. 

“Stay in your room," he instructs, and while she has more questions than anything, his austere tone is more than enough for her to not push back. 

Dulce will just have to use the crate if she has to use the bathroom. 

Without another word, Solo carries Dulce up the stairs and into her room where she lays the puppy in her bed and Solana climbs onto her.

Chewing on her bottom lip, she grabs her phone and opens up the latest group text thread she was messaging in. 

Solana: Can I ask you guys something?

Their replies come in not even five minutes later. 

Bayley: Of course!

Naomi: Anything.

Without allowing herself too much time to overthink it, Solana sends out the simple question.

Solana: Who or what is Rhodes?

Solana: Roman just rushed out of here after Jimmy said something about Rhodes men being on Bloodline territory. I’m not allowed to leave the mansion.

Just like the start of the conversation, the replies come in almost instantaneously. 

Naomi: Fuck.

Naomi: Yes, stay put. Solo’s there with you, right?

Solana: Yes.

Solana’s anxiety is only growing. Naomi sounds just as intense as Jimmy and Roman were. 

Her follow up text doesn’t do anything to help the confusion either.

Naomi: The less you know, the better. The guys will handle it.

Handle what, though? That’s what Solana really wants to know. What is the story here, and why did this Rhodes person or group have Roman so wired. 

Just then, another notification comes through. From Bayley, but in their individual thread and not the group chat. 

Solana switches over, reading her messages as they arrive almost back to back. 

Bayley: Rhodes is a person, but…that’s a complicated story.

Bayley: And I'd feel bad telling someone else’s story, but what I can tell you is that Rhodes is Cody Rhodes, head to the Nightmare Factory, the Bloodline’s biggest opp. Tensions have been at an all time high for like two generations with countless bodies dropped on both sides. It’s always a bloodbath when they’re in the same vicinity. 

Solana is regretting even asking anything in the first place. Bloodbath when they’re in the same vicinity, the same vicinity Roman is heading for as she types. Her shoulders drop, anxiety starting to shift to a new target. 

Concern for his safety.

Bayley: If you’re somehow ever in a situation where someone from the Nightmare territory is around, get the hell out of dodge. They won’t hesitate to kill you, especially with you being Roman’s wife.

Bayley: Or Rollins. Seth Rollins. Especially him. Guy is fuckin’ psycho.

Solana: Rollins?

Bayley: Roman, Seth, and Cody used to be friends a long time ago, like way long ago, and it just….it went bad. Really really fucking bad, and Cody and Roman have hated each other since. Like, I don’t know if hate is even a strong enough word for how much they can’t stand each other. 

Solana: But why?

Bayley never replies. 

________

Roman doesn’t step back into the house until almost 4am. He feels every bit exhausted as he probably looks, more physical than anything, some mental, maybe more than he’d like to admit.

Dealing with anything Nightmare related typically has that impact on him.

Solo meets him at the door, looking as on alert as he did when Roman first saw him at the ass crack of dawn this morning. 

The first thing to leave Roman’s mouth isn’t intentional as much as it is unintentional. “How was she?”

Solo motions to the marble flooring leading to the spacious living room. “She’s waiting for you.”

Roman wasn’t expecting to hear that, and he’s certain it shows in his facial expression. “What? Why? Why is she still up?”

Solo shrugs. “You’ll have to ask her. She don’t talk to me.” Which is more Solo’s preference anyway. It’s his job to protect her, not be her fucking friend. “Everything good?” Roman nods but doesn’t say anything, still stuck on the fact that Solana is still up. “Imma head out.”

Roman’s response is as distant as his expression. He doesn’t care whether Solo stays or leaves. “Alright.”

Once his enforcer is out the house, Roman sure enough finds Solana sitting on the sofa, legs crossed, notebook in her lap as she writes away.

“Solana.”

She gasps, clearly taken by surprise, but when her head lifts and her eyes land on him, she untangles her legs and moves the journal to the side. Solana walks over to him, keeping a distance that makes sense for her. “You’re back….”

“What are you still doing up? Don’t you have work in a couple hours?”

“It’s okay.” She shakes her head, adding sheepishly, “I–I don’t sleep much anyway.” He knows this well. “I just—I wanted to make sure you were okay.” Her eyes widen as she hones in on the nasty looking cut near the middle of his hairline. “You’re hurt….”

It’s really not until she says anything that Roman remembers the only “injury” he received from tonight’s bloodbath. “It’s fine.” He then redirects the focus to the main topic at hand. “Solana, you don’t have to wait up for me.”

She ignores him, actually ignores him and instead reaches up to feel the cut that’s maybe a bit more deeper than he realized because her feather light touch brings a bit of a sting. 

“You need stitches.” It doesn’t sound like a suggestion, and he realizes as such following her next surprising action. She takes his hand and leads him into the kitchen, motioning for him to sit down on the stool as she pulls out the medical kit from under the sink. 

Similar to the night of WarGames, she moves in between his open legs and starts tending to his cut, meticulously and carefully stitching him up.

She says not a word, and neither does he. Truthfully, it’s more an unconscious thing than conscious, like neither knows what or if to say something. Especially considering both are currently feeling more than what they know how to properly verbalize, or verbalize at all, really. 

“There….” Roman can tell when she’s done. She gently runs her fingers over her diligent work, her eyes focused on the source of her apparent concern when all he wants is for her to look at him, for her eyes to lock on him. “I think I’m—” And just as Solana goes to move away, to step back and clean up, she’s stopped. 

She’s stopped, because Roman reaches for her, keeping her near him.

His hand is initially on the small of her back, and Solana has the same experience from earlier. That initial tense feeling that quickly mellows into something almost calm, almost secure. 

She’s not sure she’s ever been this close to him, not since the last time she tended to his injuries, not since their wedding day, since their wedding night.

But unlike that last almost traumatic time, she’s not pummeled with anxiety, not paralyzed with fear. 

It’s just the calm. 

His eyes never leave her, bouncing back and forth between her eyes and lips. He then says in a low voice that’s unlike anything she’s heard from him before. “Solana….”

There’s something different about the way he says her name, something more sincere, something almost….vulnerable. 

Roman suddenly has both hands on her hips, holding her, just as her nervous hand moves to lay her palm against his chest. 

His eyes instantly shut at her touch. Interactions with anything regarding Rhodes have always done something to Roman emotionally, but it’s always been something he can manage relatively well. Something simple and easy. There’s nothing simple and easy about whatever the fuck is coursing through him at having her so close to him, having her touch, soft and unsure as the expression in her eyes. 

She doesn’t know what to make of his eyes closing nor does she have time to consider what to make of that because an image, a flashback of a different kind of touch, a much more painful, visceral touch shoots to the forefront of her mind.

And her chest starts tightening, that fear drawing back up. 

“I–I can’t.” Because as much as some part of her, albeit big or small, likes this, likes being close to him, feels safe being this close to thim, another part, much larger and much stronger, can't handle being this close to him. “I’m sorry.” Eyes watering, she breaks away, Dulce is quickly behind her, Solana reaching to hold the puppy as she dashes up the stairs. 

Roman sits unsure, confused, angry. He stands up, pacing across the floor, hands up and on the side of his head before his fist slams against the refrigerator door. He curses, but not from the blow. That shit doesn’t hurt. 

His reaction and frustration is directed solely toward the fact that he doesn’t know what the fuck he’s feeling right now.

The same thing Solana is struggling with as she sits on her bed, legs pulled up to her chest, silently crying into her thighs.

Both of them wondering the same exact thing:

What the hell just happened?

[venus-is-thinking]

DRDT Chapter 2 Episode 16: Initial Thoughts

Sorry for missing episode 15 :(

That being said, oh my god, Chapter 2 is actually complete! This is so exciting! I'm really hyped to talk about this episode and give my not-live summary of my live reactions!

SPOILER WARNING FOR DRDT THROUGH THE END OF CH 2!!!

CW: Murder, sacrifice, suicide

The Reactions

12-1, this time. I'm still personally partial to the extra vote on Teruko last Trial being Arei (being petty about her "I'm voting for you no matter what" thing), so I would assume Ace is the Teruko vote. If so, I do think it's interesting that he voted Teruko as opposed to, like, Nico. Then again, it might be that it's just more convenient for DRDTdev to consistently put the extra vote on Teruko, lol.

Notably, the dead people have "N/A," not 0. We probably could tell this because of Xander last time, but I didn't check. I wonder if this implies we won't ever need to vote for someone dead (ex. a mastermind who "died" earlier in the killing game).

I'm free... I can read whatever Eden says as genuine...

Take THAT, Whit time loop theorists /j

I do think it's funny/kinda telling? that Whit is only saying this after the trial is over. Like, I feel like the normal time to go "oh my god we're having another trial" is, like... when you find the body? So, it's interesting that his reaction is so delayed.

So, I don't know if this was an intentional parallel, but...

These feel similar to me. I really like the Ace/Arei parallels, where they're both chronically hated people, but Arei apologizes and tries to change whereas Ace lets the fear and paranoia consume him until there's no turning back. Ace only says this after he's already been found guilty of murder; Arei says this before promising to change her ways to the victim of her bullying.

Teruko out here hopping on that self-blame train.

It's so funny how different Hu's standards are when talking about Ace's murder vs. Nico's attempted murder. Like... Hu this is what everyone was telling you like an hour ago. What.

It's really interesting that we're highlighting this line. I wonder if this is part of a theme that we're going to explore further, maybe tied into the "all murderers have to be punished" thing. Or maybe Eden isn't actually accurate here, but doesn't know it; has Ace killed someone in the past?

Fun trick you can do here!

When we first met Teruko a week ago, she was the same person, certainly, but she was also different. She was happier, and she trusted people more.

There are so many good character parallels in DRDT. The Ace/Teruko one was really interesting in this post-trial.

Ooh, new flavor of J anti-murder! This seems to be broadening it to also being critical of the killing game, which would go against my weird hypothetical "J is anti-murderer but also the mastermind" read.

It's interesting, with how this is Ace's logic. It makes total sense for his character, though. I think it's easy for us, the viewers, to forget the fact that the characters probably don't have the precedent of "every blackened ever always loses." When Ace is running the odds, he thinks his survival odds were better as a killer than as a participant in the killing game. And y'know, considering how close he came to dying as Nico's victim, that's kinda fair.

I desperately want to know what Levi was going to say here.

I really like the fact that Ace DID care about Levi. That he intrinsically cares about him, but he knows factually that he isn't supposed to like or trust someone in a killing game. That once he killed Arei, he had to resolve to kill everyone in the killing game, even Levi.

The only way Ace knew to prevent himself from caring was to stay mad, I guess. Kinda unfortunate though, considering that I do think Levi wanted to patch things up with him genuinely.

Meanwhile, Levi, who doesn't understand emotions, is just like "man what the fuck. That makes no sense."

What a pair. I'm sad we're not going to get to see their dynamic anymore :(

In other words, I'm back on the Levi survivor train baby! My biggest problem with it before was that I thought Ace was gonna survive and I didn't think Ace and Levi were both gonna survive, so now we're locking tf in!

This is fun! I always wonder why more people don't try stuff like this. Like... shoot your shot. You're gonna die otherwise, soooo...

Great animation as always

I think it's really funny that Teruko is so fucking mad that she bullies Ace into action. Like, that's so fitting for both of them.

I love using this David expression here. He's just like, "was it that easy? Why was I trying to throw the trial then???"

aaaaAAAAAAAA--

What the fuck!! XF-Ture mention!!!!!!!!

I like the spooky vibe MonoTV has for this post-trial, but I do hope we get our normal silly lil guy back next chapter. I like the MonoTV personality we see all the time. I'm gonna miss it if it just died like that :(

I am also squinting so hard at everyone's reactions through "who is the mastermind" goggles. Maybe I'll analyze them in a different post sometime.

Fascinating purpose. Not "to create despair." Not "to run the killing game until only one participant survives." To kill everyone.

Does this include whichever mastermind?

Why does whoever programmed MonoTV want to kill all of these people? Are they being punished for something?

This countdown sequence fucked me up. The tensions and emotions are so high. Even as someone who was confident that Teruko, at least, wasn't going to die no matter what, I was so on edge. I got really scared that Eden was going to take the hit for Teruko, though, and that's what I was reading into when I wasn't sure Eden would make it to Chapter 3.

This speech, more than any other one Teruko has made or any actions she's taken or endured, really made me feel for Teruko. The fact that she can so casually talk about truly traumatic and horrific things happening to her, while smiling, truly shows how much she's grown used to it. Like, girl. You don't deserve this. What.

The character work on Teruko especially this episode is just fantastic. No words.

This panel stressed me out so bad because it was really just a question of WHO took the bullet for Teruko. Like, if she's thinking this, someone clearly did.

My bets were on either Eden, Charles, or Ace.

Levi, though, was such a surprise to see. Like, in a good way. It means so much.

First of all, it's a callback to the end of the prologue. Levi attacks MonoTV, and when MonoTV tries to kill him in response, Teruko's danger sense alerts her. It's only through Teruko warning Levi to move that Levi dodged the main attack, resulting in only an arm injury rather than death. Now, Levi returns her favor, preventing her from dying from attacking MonoTV.

Second, it puts Ace into the position we see of having to confront the possibility of Levi's death. I got the distinct sense that they wanted Ace to be able to do something heroic on his way out, to prove all the haters wrong (which is why I thought it was possible he'd take the hit for Teruko instead of Levi). By putting Levi, pretty clearly the person he cares most about, into harm's way, it makes Ace take action. It means that he HAS to confront the fact that he cares Levi, and that he has to die.

And, thirdly... I am so fascinated to learn why Levi did this. Was it as simple as a transactional, "you saved me from execution before?" Is it "I thought saving someone would make me a good person?" Does Levi actually feel some remorse for Teruko in this moment, causing him to take action?

No matter what his reasoning, I can't wait to hear from him. I strongly suspect Levi won't actually die from this (at the very least, I hope not, because I really want to hear more from him), but even if he does, hopefully we'll still get some more insight in a bonus episode or a flashback or something.

I'm trying to figure out what triggered Whit here.

This is immediately following "The elevator won't open," but it also definitely can just correlate to "[person] will die if they don't receive immediate medical treatment." I have to assume that something here is reminding Whit of his mom...?

With the weird "Whit knows a lot about hanging" earlier, I got the impression that Whit's mom probably hung herself. From this, I would probably theorize that Whit found her while she was still alive, but not quickly enough to save her. Yikes.

Anyways, I think that means everyone has some kind of despair sprite now! That's fun!

o7

I'm sure many have pointed this out, but do we think he's counting himself here (Arei + Ace + Levi = 3), or do we think he feels responsible for someone else's death in his past (probably Taylor)? I'd lean towards the second one.

Y'know, before I thought Arturo was just pressed about the surgeon thing because people were unfairly hating on him. This, at least, I think implies something relating to Felicity.

Arturo doesn't have any experience saving lives. He left, and Felicity died. He can't save lives; he's only responsible for Felicity's ending. I think that's how he sees it.

On a side note, I think there's a very definite possibility that Chapter 3 cold opens on Arturo saving Levi's life??? Like, how Chapter 2 started with Eden POV, I think Chapter 3 could start with Arturo taking his shot at healing Levi, eventually resulting in Levi stabilizing. I'm not sure who would be there with him. Possibly Hu, since she was leading the "let's get Levi to the infirmary" effort...?

I love executions like this. Accirax has said before that the best executions are what make their recipient feel the most despair, and that's definitely what they did with Ace here. Put the talent aside; fear is what Ace fears the most.

Uhhhh. I'm pulling an Accirax. Part 2 in reblog!

[margotw10bis]

Crashing On Crush.JJK 7 [m]

crush!Jungkook x reader

Genre: smut; series; romance; angst

Words: 4.6k

Synopsis: What happens when your first encounter with your crush is Jungkook seeing your ass?

Warnings: sexual tension; broken heart; Calvin Klein JK (yeah, it's a warning)

previous ← 7 → next

As much as you hate it, you do find Jungkook handsome and your heart has been pounding as soon as you noticed him. And you hate that you missed him - the last time you saw him was two weeks ago in the club. You are surprised to see him but also to see he has cut his hair. You can't help but missing his puffy shoulder-length hair and you want to slap you in the face for that thought. His black locks are now shorter in a mullet-style hair cut with a bang and are lightly curled. But gosh, he looks good. A little too good for your heart's sake.

You forget to how to breath when Jungkook stops a few meters from you. You feel your cheeks burning as well as your whole body and it's not because of the hot and suffocating July of Seoul because the A/C is on inside the art gallery. It's definitely because of Jeon Jungkook, the devil manifesting in a handsome man figure.

"Hi, uhm, I have an appointment with Aecha" He says after clearing his throat

"Follow me"

Even if you invite him to walk with you, it looks like you want to run away from him. Fortunately, you quickly arrive to Aecha's office. You knock and enter, Jungkook by your side. Your colleague offers him a way better smile than you.

"Jungkook, hi! Nice to meet you in person! We are so happy to work with you" Aecha's voice is warm and magically relaxes Jungkook

"Same here"

He tries to sound cheerful. He is really happy and proud that the gallery has approached him for the project, it will surely help him for his career but he does feel tensed to see you. He can't deny he hesitated to accept the job but then he saw it as an opportunity to set the record straight with you. He has been so grumpy that even Mina has stopped asking for his attention and let him work in his office at home. Jungkook has imagined hundred of scenarios of what happened between you and the guy after you left and every single one of them ended with you in his arms. By anger and frustration, he even broke his Apple Pencil and had to buy a new one.

"I am so sorry but I don't have time to talk details with you personally" Aecha continues, genuinely annoyed "But don't worry, Y/N is very professional and I'm sure you'll get along"

Your eyes widen and you throw distraught gazes at Aecha. 'Please, don't make me do that!' You silently beg her. But she doesn't get it or chooses to ignore it as she hands you the file. You do know the artists and the theme of the exhibition, as well as other details about the events related but you don't want to work with Jungkook. You know he is supposed to provide different visuals and supports, which means that you are going to deal with him for days. You're not sure your heart can handle it and you fear your determination to hate him will fail you - to be true, it has already began when he first appeared in the lobby.

Yet, you have no choice but to take the damn file with shaky hands and ask Jungkook to follow you in the meeting room.

A feeling of pain and jealousy fills you when you realize that his girlfriend has got to see him everyday and you have no doubt that he has looked damn hot every single day of these two weeks. Even now, in front of you, he is ridiculously handsome in his matching Calvin Klein denim jacket and pants, a white t-shirt finishing his perfect look. You can't help but wondering if his underwear is also signed CK, which makes you blush. Jungkook is fucking hot like that - would you dare to say that you are aroused by the absence of his usual all-black style?

You shake your head to erase those filthy thoughts and you sit down. You open and read the file, which gives you a good excuse to not look at Jungkook.

"Did you sleep with him?"

Jungkook's voice is neutral despite his pounding heart. He couldn't help but ask you. Even if it breaks his already broken heart, he has to know. His look-the-other-way part argues that if he knows, it'll get easier to let you go.

You immediately look up and open your mouth but no sound escapes it. Just by seeing you blushing hard, Jungkook knows. His fists clench and he is angry. Not at you, but at himself. You left with another man, you slept with another man because he pushed you away. He tries to convince himself that the pinch in his heart is due to his bruised man pride but deep down he knows that it's his feelings for you that have been rattled.

"It's none of your business" You eventually decide to answer "Let's not get personal and stick to a professional behavior"

Jungkook doesn't say anything but nods, poking on his inner cheek with his tongue.

Weirdly enough, you both concentrate on work and are able to have a peaceful conversation. Some details are discussed and Jungkook notes some ideas that get through his mind while you give him more informations.

"Can I see the art pieces? It'll help to get fully in the right mood" Jungkook asks at some point

"Sure"

You both walk through the art gallery and you can see that Jungkook truly appreciates the architecture of the building. You see his doe eyes sparkle with inspiration and you can practically see all the ideas that are currently filling his brain. Witnessing his passion melts your heart.

You enter the code of the storage room and motion Jungkook to step in. You explain that you haven't receive yet all the pieces but you add that he can look at them of the website of the gallery. His back facing you, a sketchbook and a pen in his hands, he is already quickly sketching a few visuals. You are quite intrigued by how fast his brain works and you move forward gingerly. You stand on your tiptoe to look upon his large shoulder and sneak on his sophisticate drawings.

"Wow" You whisper, almost in his ear, unintentionally

Jungkook was so focus on his work that he didn't notice you, but when you opened your mouth he startles and turns his head to your face suddenly. You are so close that your breathes are mixing. His eyes look right into yours but can't help going down to yours pretty lips. He gulps, a vivid memory of your several passionate kisses coming to his mind. He knows how you taste and he is dying to feel it again on his tongue. He wets his pierced lips with his tongue and the move attracts your glance too. A spontaneous wave of arousal goes straight to your lower belly.

Thankfully - or not -, staying this long on your tiptoe causes a cramp in your left calf. You immediately step back and wince, holding on the painful leg.

"What's going on?" Jungkook asks you, alarmed

"Cramp" You hiss

It doesn't take long to Jungkook to kneel down and massage your lower leg. You blush hard but convince yourself that it's due to the pain and not to Jungkook's warm palms on your skin. But why do you mentally praise you for wearing a yellow wrap dress and not your usual slacks?

"It's okay, you don't have to-" You speak up, weakly trying to push his hands away

"Let me do that for you"

His eye is so intense that you only manage to gulp and nod, letting Jungkook rubbing your calf to relax the muscles. You hiss as his fingers palp your aching leg, instinctively grabbing on his large shoulders to not fall. Feeling your hands on him, even through the thick fabric of his denim jacket and under this circumstances, Jungkook feels good. So fucking good. His whole body, that has been tensed for weeks now, softens under your touch. It's like he was physically missing something that your hands give him back. Someway, it's the first time you wish your cramp was lasting longer.

"It's gone" You say unsurely and, with regret from both sides, Jungkook stands up

"I'm sorry-"

"Don't. Please don't" You close your eyes in pain, not willing to remember once again what he did because you surely didn't forget

You hate him for breaking your heart but you don't hate him. Quite the opposite actually. You still love him, so fucking much. You can't change the past and you surely can't be best friend with him but you can make this professional relationship work. You want it for the gallery but also for Jungkook because you still think he is very talented and deserves the contract. That's why you take a deep breathe and start talking:

"Look, I know things have been... weird between us. Let's just put that aside and concentrate on work. I really want to feel good here so let's not make things more awkward. I think it would be nice if we could be colleagues"

Jungkook looks at you for a moment, surprised. He doesn't really know what to say when there are so many things that he wants to say - if that makes any sense. He runs a hand through his fresh cut hair.

"I'll work hard then, for you"

He doesn't specify if 'you' refers to the gallery and all your colleagues and artists involved or just you. But your heart doesn't care about the difference and skips a beat. You try to put a - weird - smile on your face to look relax.

"Welcome onboard then, Mr. Jeon"

————

Day 2 of working with Jungkook and you have to say that you are surprised how things go smoothly. You and Jungkook really get along - on a professional level - and your two brains seem to share the same ideas and vision of the project.

When he went home, Jungkook went straight to his home office and started sketching some visuals. On the one hand, he wants to work slowly only to get the chance to spend more time with you. But on the other hand, he has so many ideas for the different supports. The project clearly excites him and he hasn't been this motivated for a long time. Moreover, your cute yellow dress of the day seemed to be another reminder that you are like sunshine is his life and that everything looks better when you are around.

This morning, he has joined you in the same meeting room and gave you a cup of latte - he knows it's your favorite beverage - that he has bought on its way to the gallery. The sweet gesture didn't go unnoticed by your weak heart and your cheeks did redden. As soon as you two have sat down, Jungkook put his sketchbook and graphic tablet on the desk and explained the different concepts. You were so impressed by his work and how much he has done in just one evening. You couldn't help but being worried that he had not slept well and the dark circles under his beautiful eyes proved you no wrong.

You don't even notice it was lunch time until you hear a knock on the door. You look up and meet a sweet and cute familiar face.

"I didn't want to bother you but I've been waiting for fifteen minutes so I thought that you might have forgotten me"

Jongseob seems embarrassed and is blushing hardly. Your heart immediately melts and your smile widens. This doesn't go unnoticed by Jungkook who wonders how many men have stolen your heart. He can't help but feeling jealous. When will his possessiveness stop? Especially when you're not his.

"It's okay. Actually, I lost track of time. Please come in, Seobi"

You get up and give a big hug to Jongseob. The young man is quite impressed by Jungkook. His black outfit has returned and his tattoos are showing up under his oversize t-shirt. He does look intimidating and Jongseob feels a wave of protectiveness towards you, hoping that the stranger didn't give you a hard time.

You have no idea of what is going on in Jongseob's brain and you turn back to Jungkook.

"Let's meet up in two days so you have time to make the changes we've talked about. Then, we will show everything to Aecha" You say with a smile and Jungkook simply nods.

You notice the way he is staring at your young friend and realize that they don't know each other.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't introduce you-" You are cut off by Jongseob

"I'm Kim Jongseob"

You are surprised by his confident and quite cold tone. It's so not like him. You even feel his arm easily wrapping around your shoulders. When did he get this tall? You look at him, asking him with your eyes what the hell he is doing. But Jongseob is completely focus on the black-hair man.

"Jeon Jungkook"

Jongseob's eyes widen and immediately turn to you. Your face expression confirms what he thinks: it's the man who broke your heart. If you didn't say a word on your Graduation Day, you couldn't lie when a few days later Jongseob has asked you about how it went when you confessed your feelings to your crush. Even if you tried really hard to not cry in front of him, you couldn't stop a few tears. Jongseob was so heartbroken for you and has spent the day with you at your place, eating ice-creams and watching Disney movies.

The body of your usual so cute friend tenses immediately and he leaves your shoulders to step in front of you, protectively. His eyes narrow when he gazes at Jungkook.

"I hope he hasn't done anything to you" He says with his jaw clenched, talking to you but looking at Jungkook

A scoff escapes Jungkook's lips. Who the hell is this kid? He doesn't know anything about him and yet, he is judging him. Only if he knew that at his age, Jungkook was... No, it's better if he doesn't know, otherwise you would know too. And he surely doesn't want you to know.

"Jongseob" You say softly, a hand on his shoulder "Jungkook is working with me, everything is fine"

"Can't someone else deal with him? Why it has to be you?" His voice is more gentle now and he is looking at you, finally

"No, and it's okay. I promise"

"What are you going to do about it, uh?"

Your eyes widen in surprise while Jungkook smirks and then pokes his tongue in his inner cheek in a provocative way. He doesn't even know why he opened his mouth in the first place. Maybe he was just tired of everyone treating him like shit or maybe he wanted you to know that your little guy couldn't compete with him. 'Stupid fucking ego' he thinks.

"What did you say?" Jongseob responds aggressively, taking a step further and Jungkook does the same

"I said, what are you fucking going to do about it?" Jungkook articulates each single word, his jaws clenched

You start to panic and take place between the two men.

"Stop it now, the both of you" You try to be firm but your voice is a little shaky

"You were right, he's a fucking asshole" Jongseob goads

"What did you say?" Jungkook barks this time, ready to throw punches in this little fucker's face

"Jongseob!" You shout "Go wait outside, now"

You are so tensed that your whole body is shaking with adrenaline. What are you going to do if they start fighting? But you release the air of your lungs when Jongseob does as you say. You look at Jungkook to try to know what he is thinking but his features are too neutral, except for his gritted teeth.

"Jungkook, I-I never said that" You try after a moment of silence

"It's okay" He sighs, trying to relax the tension in his body "Even if you said it, you had every reason"

You stand in front of him, not knowing what to do. You are unsettled when a little sneer escapes Jungkook's mouth. You look at him, questioning him with your eyes.

"At least you have people to protect you"

"Jungkook-"

"No, it's okay. I see you on Friday with the finished visuals and support designs"

Jungkook grabs his stuff and goes away, leaving you breathless and heart pounding.

————

"Noona, I'm sorry"

Jongseob has spent the whole lunch apologizing but you haven't said a word. You are so disappointed in his behavior but you are also destabilized by the way you feel angry at your friend for attacking Jungkook. You shouldn't feel that way, it's true that Jungkook broke your heart but why do you still want your friends to have a good impression of him? It doesn't make any fucking sense and you sigh in frustration.

"Stop apologizing. What you did was wrong Jongseob"

"I know but he... he was just there and he broke your heart! Are you really okay working with him?!"

You take the time to think. Are you okay with it? Honestly, yes. And more honestly, you are happy to work with him. You wish the reason of that was because Jungkook works well but it's not: the reason is that you want to be with him, in anyway possible.

"Yes, so please stop. Maybe you don't want to hear it or you don't understand but Jungkook is nice"

"How can you say that?!" Jongseob gasps

"He is, really. What he did to me was wrong but beside that, he has been really nice to me"

And it's true. Objectively, the cheating-on-his-girlfriend-with-you part put aside, Jungkook has been nice to you. The two days you have spent working with him showed you a new face of him: the passionate yet so considering of other's opinions side. He has carefully listened to you, has taken the time to explain to you technical things about designs and has worked hand-in-hand with you to provide the perfect visuals. Even beside that, the morning coffee and the way he has hold the chair for you to sit down or the way he has turn off the A/C when he noticed you were cold, proves he is a good person. Maybe a little selfishly too, you want to believe that you have fallen for a good guy and not a shit head so the whole story wasn't you being completely wrong about him.

"Look, I'm a big girl. I know you're worried but everything's fine, Seobi" You smile at Jongseob, trying to calm him down

"Okay..." He sighs "But if he tries anything, please tell me and I swear I'll punch him in the face, just for him to know he can't mess with you"

Your heart softens at his pouty face and you promise. You know Jongseob just wants to protect his Noona but deep down you know Jungkook won't try to hurt you again.

————

You haven't heard of Jungkook until he shows up on Friday for your expected meeting. You have sweaty hands, not knowing how will be things between the two of you. You give him an unsure smile when you welcome him and you feel released that Jungkook is back to his old and nice self. He shows you the final project and everything is perfect. You compliment his work and you may notice a slight blush on his cheeks.

You waste no time and you two head up to Aecha's office so she can approve, what she definitely does. Your colleague is really impressed and praises the both of you. Your chest is full of pride that you managed the situation. You are really excited to be more involved in one of the gallery's projects.

To celebrate your success, you invite Jungkook at a nearby coffee. It doesn't surprise you anymore that Jungkook orders you a latte but it's appealing to your weak and soft heart. Coffees in hands, you sit down at a table.

"I'm so happy that your visuals have been approved! I can't wait to see the posters in real life and on the big screens of the gallery!" You tell him excited, which makes him giggle.

"I'm glad too. Tell me if you need help with the printer guy, I know that sometimes they can be a little hard to handle and delay things until you lose your mind"

"I'll sure do"

You feel so good joking with Jungkook. It feels like before you discovered about Mina, back when everything was so natural and delightful between you two. A small wave of nostalgia washes over your body and a small part of you wishes you didn't know about the girlfriend. However, the bigger part of you feels better to know that he didn't cheat on his girlfriend with you more than that.

"I have to tell you something"

Jungkook's serious tone and face make you stressed. You wonder what other bomb he is going to throw at you and how you'll manage to survive. 'Please, tell me there is no other secret girlfriends!' You pray

"Mina" He starts and your heart sinks by hearing the name, you still feel so guilty towards her even if you didn't know "She is not my girlfriend"

What the hell?!

Your eyes almost roll of your sockets by surprise. You are speechless. Does he lie? But he is looking straight into your eyes and you don't see anything but pain. But if she is not his girlfriend, why did he lie about lying to you? It doesn't make sense!

"She is my best friend, well at least back in Busan"

"But, why?" Is all you manage to say, your brain is completely upside down

"It's just an old habit of us, saying to other people we're dating. When we were younger, we were so close that most people thought that we were actually a couple. At some point, it was kind of a joke to confirm it"

Jungkook's nostalgic smile is not happy but quite sad and your heart squeezes. You wonder what caused him such pain but you don't want to push him.

"Maybe, back then, there were more than friendly feelings between us but it's not the case anymore. I just want you to know that nothing happened between Mina and I"

"Why'd you tell me that?"

Jungkook's eyes grow big in surprise. He doesn't really know why he tells you the truth. Perhaps he just doesn't want you to hurt because of this, because of him.

"I don't know..." He sighs "I just wanted you to know"

You don't know what you feel. On the one hand, you are relived that he didn't cheat on his girlfriend with you, but on the other hand, you are still heartbroken because he has still rejected you - and the reason was not him having a girlfriend but just not wanting to be with you. And that hurts like hell.

Jungkook looks at you with his big doe eyes, biting on his bottom lip, while he waits for you to say something. But honestly, you don't know what to say. So he keeps going:

"I haven't seen her in years but she came up to me. She needed some help. Things are-were complicated. I'm sorry if I hurt you, I really didn't want that"

"I understand" You don't but what else could you say?

"Y/N" He says gently, grabbing your hand at the other side of the table "I am really, really sorry"

The warmth of his hand goes straight to your heart and cheeks. Why does he have to do that? It's so hard not to fall for him when he acts like that! You want to hug him and tell him you forget everything as long as he is with you. But you can't do that, so you smile instead.

"I wish I could go back and do things right with you. Maybe... maybe we could be friends or something?"

Jungkook winces at the way his thoughts have turned into words. It sounds so dumb and it's not really what he wanted to say. He wanted to ask you if you would accept to see him again, like before. Like when you were supposed to have a date at the Lotte aquarium.

"I guess we could be friends" You say in a small voice, almost a whisper

Jungkook's heart jumps in his chest and he knows he'll try everything to make it up to you. But first, he has to deal with Mina.

————

Since you have done a great job with the communication campaign with Jungkook, Aecha sends you over to meet the print firm. You are walking around in Seocho, a district of Seoul, but take the time to follow the Han River boardwalk. The heat and humidity is almost unbearable but the view is so beautiful. The sun is mirroring on the water. You close your eyes, feeling the D Vitamin entering your body. You hum in contentment.

Nevertheless, the universe couldn't let you in peace for five minutes. Your blood runs cold when a familiar but non welcoming face appears right in front of you. Mina. You don't really know how to act in front of her now that you know she isn't really Jungkook's girlfriend.

"Hi" You tell her with an unsure voice

"Hi, Y/N right?"

Mina's smile is bright but not really friendly. Something in her behavior makes you uncomfortable.

"I'm sorry, I can't stay long, Jungkook is waiting for me at home" She takes a dig at you

Her little scornful tone drives you crazy. Before you can even think properly, you open your mouth:

"Jungkook told me the truth. You are not really together"

For one second, Mina seems unsettled but she hides it quickly. You feel your heart beating faster and your hands freezing, just as if you were ready for a fight. It might not be a physical one but it will surely be punches with words.

"Did he?"

You stay silent, waiting for her to set the mood. You don't have hard feelings for her. You could be friends, if she wants to.

"Look, you seem like a nice girl" Although it doesn't sound like a compliment in her mouth "But I'm not sure you are the good person for Kookie"

"I think he's old enough to decide for himself"

"We might not be an official couple but we do share something special. We've been best friends for years, we have been through so many things, you won't ever be able to understand. I know him but I'm not sure you can say the same"

You are taken aback.

"I-I do know him" You sound less confident than you wanted

"Oh, really? Did he tell you about his past?" Mina smirks and you frown, confirming what she was thinking "I just don't want you to be hurt, Y/N. Jungkook and I are meant to be together. It might take some time but it will happen eventually. If you stay in between, you'll only get your heart broken"

Your watery eyes blur your vision. You don't know how Mina manages to do it but her words are so sharp that you could swear she is telling the truth. Maybe it's a result of her magnetic aura.

"I love him"

It's the final blow for you. An intense squeeze hits your cardiac muscle. You don't even know who you are anymore. You have read too many books, you have seen too many movies not to know. All along, you thought you were the main character of the story. But you're not. You're the second female lead in Jungkook's story: the one who only exists to make him realize that his true love has been in front of him since the beginning. There is no better destiny than two best friends finally aware of their true feelings. Fate, cruel as ever, put you on Jungkook's path for him to acknowledge that Mina is the right one for him.

And that fucking hurts.

previous ← 7 → next

@hoseokteardrop @aerynorirene @jkoooooooookie @lacolegaming @busanbby-jjk @mysteriousstress65 @coralmusicblaze @winter-bear98

Tell me if you want to be added to the taglist

[too-antigonish]

The Great S7 Rewrite: 7 July 2024 Update...

Posted this yesterday as a reblog update to the Great S7 Rewrite but now posting separately...

Here's a summary of where we are in the Great S7 Rewrite and some ideas moving forward:

Bone of Contention #1: Opera Rules

@astridcontramundum is in favor of keeping Opera Rules (voiceovers, framing scenes, etc.) as well as featuring more of the bespoke opera written for S7. I love her suggestion that Morse and Violetta have their own leitmotif! 

@oeuvrinarydurian suggested the possibility of leaning into Opera Rules—going a little crazy with tropes and techniques and being fanciful. 

I *love* the idea of leaning into Opera Rules and it’s actually what I’ve thought R.L. should have done all along. Now though, when I think of doing it within the context of the existing storylines we’re working with, I run into difficulties imagining it. The stories don’t fit into a “playful” world. That may simply be my own limitations. I’d love to see it done somewhere, sometime—especially somewhat whimsically and especially in the Morse universe.

One possibility I’ve considered is still having Opera Rules (voiceovers, framing scenes, etc. as well as opera tropes and themes), but actually taking them seriously instead of making them OTT. I’m heavily paraphrasing, but Astrid, in one of her stories has Bix say something like, “Real life isn’t like one of your operas,” to Morse. And it’s always struck me that for Morse, his real life *is* like one of his operas. His childhood? Being essentially orphaned. Evil stepmothers. Oxford? Almost marrying the princess so to speak. Being cast aside and cast out. What he sees at his job? Murder. Betrayal. Greed. Jealousy. Grief.

Basically, instead of making Morse’s life suddenly work according to Opera Rules, you could show how Morse has been living an opera all along by suddenly making all of the parallels visible.

Another thought that builds on Astrid’s idea about both Opera Rules and her later thoughts on the Towpath Case is to center the story on the opera that Morse attends at the beginning, "La Sposa del Demonio" (or "La Cura Per L'amore").  What if the story of that opera is reflected in the story arc of the Morse, Ludo, Violetta—whatever that ends up being? 

Bone of Contention #2: Ludo and Violetta?

Astrid likes the idea of having Violetta genuinely in love with Morse. 

@librawritesstuff brings up Violetta as “Unattainable Fantasy Woman” and points out that part of Morse’s attraction to her can be explained by the fact that by the end of S6, he’s been screwed over in just about every way possible. He’s ready to just say fuck it and go after something just because it’s there and he wants it for a change.

She then points out that the bigger problem with Ludo and Violetta lies in the implausibility of their storyline. What was the plan with Morse? Was there a plan? What’s the deal with the “pet policeman”?

Durian: Hates Ludo and Violetta as characters, but her big issue is with lack of logic in the whole opera storyline and too many implausibilities. Did Morse and Violetta meet at the opera by chance or design? Did Ludo know about them the whole time? What was the “pet policeman” about? Was Violetta actually involved in the nuts and bolts of engineering the accidents?

@fanficrocks Looks at making Morse’s relationship with Ludo more believable: less OTT as a character, maybe journalist friend of Dorothea, this gives a believable reason for him to be in all of the towns where the accidents happen and believable way for Morse to trace the accidents to him. Suggests possibly lose “pet policeman” concept and just have Ludo and Morse friendship poisoned by affair

Astrid again: Loves idea of Ludo as journalist; She notes with Violetta: Morse attaching to her out of recklessness seems reasonable but they didn’t make her attachment to him believable in any way. Also, while there was a reconciliation at the end of S6, Morse would have still been carrying resentment about having been pushed aside

I love the idea of Ludo as a journalist. I’m also intrigued by the possibility that he could be a music journalist. This would provide a plausible explanation for so many things—Dorothea introducing him to Morse, Morse actually wanting to become friends, his frequent travels, etc. 

It also gives me an idea re: the big opera La Sposa. What if it were a newly discovered opera? Morse goes to Venice for the premier. Ludo is there covering the premier but for some reason does not attend with Violetta. The plot of this opera could somehow also form a backdrop for the overall Morse, Ludo, Violetta story arc (story within a story).

I completely agree with Libra about the “Unattainable Fantasy Woman” thing for the initial two week affair. Where that starts to break down for me is with the extended affair and her cooking meals for them in their love nest at Beirut dancer’s apartment. There just seems to be no basis for their connection besides sex. Certainly not enough that he would be expecting her to leave Ludo and start a life together.

If we keep Ludo and Violetta as characters, which seems to be the way things are leaning, I do think they both more or less need personality transplants to justify Morse’s continued interest in them. I’m also with Astrid on having Violetta genuinely in love with Morse. I think they left it ambiguous in the show because they were playing on the whole idea of “If it's beautiful, does it matter if it’s real?” (“treason of images” ) thing, but it never really worked.

As for the overall implausibility of overall opera storyline: Yes!!!! It’s a mess. Every point raised by Libra and Durian is valid. Whatever happens with the storyline, those holes need fixing!

Bone of Contention #3: Towpath Storyline

Astrid: Universe within universe for towpath killings. Make it opera related. Gives more scope for Thursday/Morse conflict. Deranged fan? Thwarted performer? Also, while there was a reconciliation at the end of S6, Morse would have still been carrying resentment about having been pushed aside.

Durian: Eliminate clutter in Towpath mystery: get down to “is it or is it not Carl?” Leaves room to carefully craft the conflict between Morse and Thursday

I definitely agree that the clutter in the Towpath mystery needs to be eliminated. There was no clear throughline and the story pulled in too many directions. The specifics, though, depend on a lot of other decisions that need to be made first.

The conflict between Morse and Thursday definitely needs to be more carefully established. How do we get from the seeming reconciliation of Degüello to sniping at each other in Oracle? I completely agree with Astrid that Morse would have still been carrying resentment, but there needs to be something more to explain how it would erupt in such a public and painful manner.

Bone of Contention #4: The Episodic Storylines

Astrid: “I’d definitely keep those gay wrestlers!  I might feature them more! They could be another nod to it all. Thursday said wrestling was a lot like opera. Heroes and Villains. Faces and Heels.”

I love this comment! And I loved the gay wrestlers. They were just so unexpected and their presence was so understated in a way that I found hilarious. 

But it also gets at one of the themes of S7 that I did actually find interesting: How chance puts us on one side or the other, makes us winners or losers in the great game. Raga is the most blatant about it with politics, immigration, race, gambling, etc. but also with the Faces and the Heels in wrestling or the fate of  the firstborn son vs. the second born.

Ludo sums it up—while also perhaps referring to his crimes—by saying to Morse, “Life, death, rich, poor. It's all a roll of the dice, Morse. There's no reason to any of it. You're not responsible. Some people are just unlucky.” It's eerily reminiscent of Charlie and Conrad Greel in Ride.

OK, I think that's it for now. Please let me know if I misrepresented your comments in any way or missed something that was said! I assure you it was accidental.

[anthurak]

Imagine how perfect it would be if it turns out that Salem is actually COUNTING ON the heroes killing Cinder out of revenge?

As in, Salem has a failsafe in place to ensure that if Cinder dies, she can still recover the Maiden powers from her. Perhaps Salem has a small grimm (similar to what Cinder used to extract the powers from Amber) imbedded deep inside Cinder, or some form of mental conditioning to ensure that if Cinder dies, the Maiden powers WILL go where Salem wants them to. Either to Salem herself or perhaps one of her other hybrids or perhaps even a specialized grimm Salem has modified to specifically serve as a storage-device for the Maiden powers until Salem can find a new holder for them*.

Meaning that when Cinder just can’t resist her raging hate-boner for not-actually-dead Ruby and sneaks/tears off to Vacuo against Salem’s orders to murderify her once and for all, Salem isn’t actually worried.

First Salem decides that Cinder has finally lost her ‘free will’ privileges and triggers the ‘assuming direct control’ protocols of Cinder’s grimm implants/prosthetics, causing Cinder to forcibly undergo a horrific and painful transformation into a full grimm hybrid just as she’s about to fight Team RWBY. Complete with Salem giving a terrified Cinder a classic ‘you have outlived your usefulness’ telepathic speech.

At this point, Salem can see only two possible outcomes to this charade: Either Grimm!Cinder is able to survive her rampage and make it back to her, now an entirely obedient slave. Or she’s killed by Team RWBY and co, in which case Salem can still get the Maiden powers back and find a new host, making this far more of an inconvenience than a true setback. And with any luck, perhaps Cinder’s rampage will manage to do some serious damage, maybe kill off a few of Salem’s more prominent enemies.

Even when Ruby is able to hit Grimm!Cinder with a full-power Silver Eye blast that manages to obliterate the vast majority of her grimm-attachments, even if she’s lost direct contact, Salem still isn’t worried.

After all, there’s no way the heroes will be able to resist killing the girl who has done so much to hurt them and take so many of their friends from them.

But then Ruby does the ONE thing Salem wasn’t counting on.

She shows Cinder MERCY.

Instead of simply being killed, Cinder is captured. And is therefore removed from Salem’s influence and given the opening to be shown genuine sympathy, positivity and kindness for what may be the first time in her life.

At the very least, from Ruby, Weiss, Blake and Yang, who have already seen first-hand the horrors of Salem’s grimm-experiments back in Atlas. And in Ruby’s and Yang’s case, are almost certainly grappling with the looming possibility that their mother was subjected to similar horrors.

And thus, through acts of mercy and kindness, Team RWBY is able to completely blindside Salem, removing one of her most vital agents from her control, and ultimately turning her AGAINST Salem.

Salem has always counted on her enemies showing cynicism, ‘pragmatism’ and cruelty.

But her enemies showing optimism, idealism and KINDNESS?

THOSE are the things Salem ISN’T expecting.

Not to mention it would play PERFECTLY into the themes of ‘Choice’ that have always surrounded Cinder: By chasing after Ruby to Vacuo, Cinder; the girl who has spent her entire life being denied a ‘choice’ by those in power above her, is finally MAKING a choice. And after spending the entire show dancing obediently on Salem’s strings, Cinder is defying Salem. And through this choice to defy, Cinder inadvertently puts herself in the position to be finally FREED of Salem’s control.

All because of Ruby.

Oh, and also the reactions of all of the people who have spent years now baying for Cinder’s blood would be fucking hilarious XD I mean just imagine the show pointing directly at everyone clamoring for Jaune or Ruby to ‘take revenge’ and how Cinder ‘totally deserves to die’ and effectively saying “Yeah, so the villain was actually counting on the heroes to do EXACTLY THAT.”

--

*And if anyone is going to say something like ‘grimm can’t use maiden powers’, let me reiterate that it is to STORE the powers. Let’s not forget that we have seen grimm being used as a conduit for Maiden powers when Cinder stole part of Amber power and later tried to steal power from Raven and Penny. So it stands to reason that grimm could also be used to store the power as well. Which all frankly makes perfect sense when we consider that both the grimm and the magic of the maidens ultimately come from the same source: The God of Darkness (remember when he called magic “My gift to them”?)

[stevesjockstrap]

Part 2/2 🖤 part one or Read on ao3 • rated E — all the smut in this one (full tags on ao3)

tattoo artist Eddie, swimmer Steve Harrington, oblivious Eddie, pierced Eddie, appearance by Steve’s jockstrap 🫠 dom!Eddie, brat Steve ofc

@steddieonmywaywardson @steddiesummerexchange

Thanks again to @fuctacles and @lawrencebshoggoth 😘

Walking into the bar a few days later to see Steve in a tight crop top and very short jean shorts with the Calvin Klein band of his underwear showing a few inches above them had Eddie almost dropping to his knees.

He hadn’t been that excited about the 80’s theme night at their regular dive bar but now being faced with the happy trail and bare arms of his … what would he even call their relationship? They weren’t exactly friends. He was a little more than a client, honestly, but Eddie was hoping for much more than that. He just didn’t think it was going to happen. Gorgeous athletic assuredly straight guys like Steve Harrington do not end up with fuck ups like Eddie Munson. He knew what he looked like, the long hair and piercings and almost all of his body covered in weird tattoos. Cute frat boy types didn’t go for the likes of him.

“Eddie!”

He spun around to see Chrissy in a bright neon pink leotard with a headband. His own leather jacket and Judas Priest T-shirt seemed lame now, looking around at everyone who had gone above and beyond for the theme.

“Hey Chrissy. Love the outfit. Are you leading us in Jazzercise tonight?”

She laughed hard and genuine, throwing her head back and making her high pony tail swing around.

Steve came up next to them with an easy grin. “Hey Ed! How are you?”

“Hi Steve. Pretty good, pretty good. You guys really went all out, huh?”

Steve huffed a small laugh and shrugged, completely nonplussed that he was the hottest person in the place. Maybe the state. What Eddie would give-

“Can I buy you a drink?” Someone came up beside them, looking Chrissy up and down.

“Sure!” The guy in a cowboy hat and jeans (maybe had forgotten which theme night he was attending, or maybe he thought it was the 1880s, who knew) offered her his elbow and lead them to the bar. Steve threw a thumbs up at her when she turned to look back at him and Eddie wanted to run away immediately.

Thankfully he was saved by the Corroded Coffin boys showing up, but then Eddie had to awkwardly introduce them officially after they ragged on him for their enthusiastic session.

But Steve was amazing, unquestioningly shaking their hands and engaging in the typical polite small talk. The boys complimented his outfit without making it feel weird, and Steve excitedly pointed out Drew’s Metallica shirt and started an in-depth conversation about the album (making Eddie silently swoon beside him).

Chrissy rejoined them after cutting her suitor loose, and they all found themselves hanging at a corner of the bar, shooting the shit with the bartender and judging everyone else’s attire and the music.

As more and more alcohol was consumed, Eddie was quickly losing his mind. Steve was so comfortable in himself, talking with anyone who approached the bar or started talking with them. It shouldn’t have been that attractive, but Eddie who had grown up with all the same people surrounding him now, he found it hard to make friends. Chrissy and Argyle had found their way into his life by accident, but their extroverted selves had just adopted the sad boys in the tattoo shop and frequently drug them out of their comfort zones.

Eddie almost swallowed his tongue when a tall good looking man approached Steve and asked him to dance, waiting to see the hate crime in action that he was expecting. Waiting for the other shoe to drop, something to finally burst the Steve Harrington shaped bubble forming in his heart.

Instead, Steve gave him a demure smile and went with him, actually taking his hand and allowing the man to escort him to the dance floor where they quickly got into the groove and Eddie was dumbfounded.

He blinked at Chrissy and she sent him a look, but he was too drunk to decipher it. He couldn’t figure out why this was somehow worse than when he’d assumed Steve was straight and unattainable. Now that there may be a possibility — he shook his head at himself, quickly draining his cup and waving off the questions from the boys as he threw cash onto the table and stood. He had to go home before he embarrassed himself. Or made a fool of himself in front of Steve.

Gareth sent him a small sad smile and patted his shoulder as he went past.

The next few days went by quickly, Eddie trying to settle the slight nausea whenever he thought of how he’d acted with Steve at his tattoo appointment (and the consult meeting beforehand), forcing himself to be even more professional at his appointments now to try to overcompensate.

“Are you into Steve?”

Eddie scoffed and watched as the cue ball went wide, missing its target completely. “What the fuck, Chrissy?”

She smirked at him from the other side of the table, quickly pocketing two of her striped balls.

“Well?” She asked again. Chrissy had drug him back to the bar, apparently to interrogate him.

“Is this just a dirty trick to win at pool? Or a real question?” Eddie peered at her while she scoped out the table.

“A question can be more than one thing,” Chrissy said with a wide grin. “People, too.”

Eddie frowned, game now forgotten. “What does that mean?”

Chrissy shrugged and took a drink from her beer. Eddie took a few steps closer to her. “Is Steve asking about me?”

She had let it slip earlier that she’d gotten together with him and Eddie tried not to let it bother him. They’d only exchanged a few messages since he had been in his tattoo chair. Eddie had tried to keep it cool, letting Steve know scars were finicky and not to worry about any areas that healed strangely. He’d be able to touch them up. Eddie had winced to himself at the double entendre and then the conversation hadn’t really progressed like before.

Chrissy shrugged again and Eddie wanted to shake her.

“Chris, you’re killing me.” He gulped down his own beer and sighed. “Look. I tried to be so professional with Steve. If I made him uncomfortable I can apologize or whatever. But yeah, he’s fucking gorgeous and sweet and funny and completely out of my league. You probably know all of this, and you’re fucking with me. To win a dumb game of pool. But, for your own sick twisted amusement, yes. I know I have zero chance, but I know I’ve never been that hard while tattooing someone. Does that answer all the things of your question?”

She just nodded, but had a small sly grin on her face.

Eddie lost three games of pool before he called it a night. Then went home and scrolled through his messages with Steve to torture himself.

“Are you inviting your boy to the party?”

Eddie actually looked behind him to see who Gareth was talking to, and not seeing anyone in the vicinity, he frowned. “Huh?”

“The big end of summer thing at Argyle’s? Are you going to invite Steve?”

Eddie dropped his phone, and Gareth snickered at him. “He’s not- Wha- Do- uh.” He looked around the packed shop, lowering his voice. “Should I?”

Gareth rolled his eyes. “How long are you going to keep circling each other? You obviously both like each other, he gets along well with all of us somehow, you act like a lovestruck teenager when he’s around. What’s stopping you?”

Eddie thunked his head on the table and Gareth chuckled at his dramatics.

He’d always kept a decent eye on his schedule and appointments, Argyle complimenting him because trying to figure out the other guy’s schedules and trying to work with their convoluted systems was more than he could take some days.

It wasn’t until he walked into his office and found Steve there instead of the promised Mike Hawk that he second guessed giving him access to his calendar.

“Oh. Um. Hi, Steve. Why are you- I mean, its good to see you, but well, uh…”

Eddie trailed off, awkwardly standing in his own doorway.

“It may have been Chrissy’s idea,” Steve supplied. “And Argyle… could put someone in your calendar. I couldn’t get a hold of you, and I didn’t really want to bother you by just showing up and taking away from your work, I just, I dunno.” He was so genuine and seemed shy now somehow, even more endearing to Eddie.

“Uh, sure. That doesn’t seem stalkery at all,” Eddie huffed.

“Think of it more as, I dunno, just a surprise appointment instead of being tricked by all of your friends.” Steve grabbed the back of his neck, smirking.

“Oh? Is that what we are? Friends?”

That didn’t seem to deter Steve at all, in fact his smile widened and maybe blushing.

“I was hoping, to be that, or…” Steve stood, and Eddie realized he was wearing the black sweatpants he had sent him home in. “Since I sort of have an appointment, could you look at this tattoo for me? The last guy, he did his best, but you know, tattoos over scars can be finicky, I hear.”

Eddie laughed, his heart unclenching. “Yeah, you know not all tattoo artists are as professional as me.”

Steve walked closer to him, reaching behind him to pull his door shut. Eddie swallowed.

Wiggling out of the sweatpants and turning, Eddie let out a gasp. Steve stood before him in a jockstrap, tattoo still healing but areas on and around his scars lighter and fuzzier. However, his brain mostly clued into the fact that Steve’s entire ass was bare to him, and all of his long legs.

“Uhh huh, well it does seem like your scars haven’t taken the ink as well. C-can, um, can you stay here for a minute? Just give me one minute?”

Steve turned again, giving him a small nod and stepping back into his (Eddie’s) sweats.

In the middle of the tattoo shop, Eddie stopped and looked around. Only about half of the guys were in today. Weekdays they didn’t all need to be here. Argyle smirked at him from the front desk. Eddie glared and approached him quickly.

“What is this all about? You putting fake names in my schedule for people to ambush me now?”

“Hey, you’re welcome, brochacho. Go back there and get your shit together.”

Eddie laughed, all his annoyance gone instantly. He met Argyle’s outstretched fist with his own, shaking his head. “Thanks, man.”

Realizing he had actually left a hot half naked guy alone in his office, he quickly grabbed stuff from his work station and hustled back, locking the door behind him.

Steve was lounging on his couch with his arms crossed, making his arms and shoulders look ridiculous.

“So, um, this last dude who tattooed you, was he- you know, did you like him?” Eddie grinned, tucking his tongue behind his teeth.

“Ah, he was alright. I think I’m going to like you a lot better though.”

Eddie chuckled, shaking his head as he dumped his stuff on his desk.

“I think we’re going to set up shop back here, if that’s cool with you. I kind of got drug over the coals for, uh, an interesting session a few weeks ago. The boys won’t let me live down another performance like that. And since we’re just doing a touch up…”

Steve reached behind his head to grab the collar of his shirt and pulled it off with a flourish. “Fine by me. Although, between us, that guy probably enjoyed the attention.”

Eddie stopped to groan, rubbing over his face. “Fuck. Well, maybe next time then, Stevie.”

His gaze slid from his cocky grin down his hairy chest, down to his tantalizing happy trail that was still burned in his memory from the bar that night.

“God, you’re pretty,” he breathed, unaware he had said it out loud until the belly he was eyeing shuddered with a laugh.

“Where do you want me, Eds?”

“Uhh, there’s an old bench shoved here somewhere. Gotta be more comfortable than on my desk.” As he said it, he winced but he watched as Steve’s eyes darkened.

“Yeah, you can bend me over your desk another time.”

“Jesus Christ,” Eddie chuckled.

Eddie popped up the dusty table, quickly but efficiently wiping it down with disinfectant before beckoning him over. Steve stood again, sliding the sweats from his legs as Eddie watched, enraptured. He didn’t take his eyes off of him as he laid down, arching his back as he positioned himself and had to hang his arms off the sides to fit.

Other tattoos he hadn’t gotten to see before drew his attention away from the magnificent ass, some script across his ribs and a baseball bat with nails through it on his bicep.

The one he’d done on his thigh was the biggest, and was the most detailed. If he’d known (or had thought to ask any questions) he would’ve prepared Steve better for the pain he’d had to endure. Hindsight being what it was, he just shrugged at himself and carried on. Nothing to do for it now. Steve had come back, after all.

Sucking in a deep breath, Eddie traced a finger down his spine and over the leg strap that crossed over the tattoo. “Gunna slide this up a little, baby.”

The word felt like too much, hanging between them, but Steve made a little affirmative noise in his throat and arched into the touch.

Eddie put his gloves on, got his tray set up and let himself believe this was actually happening.

“You gunna sit so good for me again, sweetheart?”

Steve whined and nodded, Eddie watched his fingers flex into fists.

“Your pretty little mermaid for everyone to see, been showing it off to everyone?”

“No, haven’t, not really. Did everything you said. Even kept it out of the sun.”

Eddie coughed to cover the little whimper that came out of him, when he realized there were no tan lines to be found on all of the skin under his hands. Steve must sunbathe in the nude, but hadn’t been with his new tattoo.

“You like following my directions, Stevie?” He smirked even though he knew Steve couldn’t see.

“Yes sir.”

Eddie almost dropped the tattoo gun. “Fuck, sweetheart. Just relax. Just be a good boy for now, okay? I’ll take care of you.”

“Mhm,” Steve whined as Eddie continued. Thankfully his previous self had plotted the scars mostly in the mermaids dark hair or background, easily able to blend into shadows and such so he didn’t need to redo stencils or think very much, since most of his focus was again on the little noises Steve was making and his ass under his hands.

Steve had definitely been holding back the first time, because now the noises were even more constant and pornographic. Eddie knew he was dripping in his boxers, trying his best to quickly deposit the ink in Steve’s perfect skin.

“Doing so well, pretty boy.”

“Feels good, Eds. Could sit here forever,” Steve whimpered.

“Mhm,” Eddie hummed, not acknowledging the lie as he watched Steve’s jaw flex and the muscles bunch under his hands. “Relax, Steve. Or I’ll stop.”

Cooing at his devastated noise, Eddie wiped ink from his body again and pressed a kiss to his side, making Steve cry out and his hips jolt.

“Oh fuck, you’re going to be the death of me. How can you be this hot?”

Eddie stopped. “Huh? Me?”

“Of course, Eds. You think all of this was for show? I just get naked in front of people I don’t think are hot?”

That stumped him. “I mean- uh, but-“

“I thought I was pretty blatant the first time, but Chrissy-“

“Chrissy,” Eddie groaned. Of course she was in on this. This stunt had her name written all over it. “Holy shit.”

Steve rolled over on his other hip to look up at him. “Eds, it was her idea but only because I had been whining to her about not knowing how to get your attention. She said you were not going to catch any subtle teasing or jealousy tactics, that I’d have to go big and obvious. This was as, uh, big and obvious as we could agree upon.”

Eddie frowned. “Agree upon?”

“Chrissy had much more elaborate plans, but I didn’t want to like publicly embarrass either of us. I just wanted it to be us, and you know, maybe the shop guys, that was really hot last time. But-“

Eddie stopped him with a kiss, Steve grinning into it and finally wrapping his arms around him. He ripped the black rubber gloves from his hands and someone pushed the tray of supplies out of the way, then suddenly he had a lapful of mostly naked Steve.

When they finally broke apart gasping, he traced Steve’s wet bottom lip with his thumb and Steve pulled it into his mouth. “Goddamn you’re amazing. So fucking gorgeous. Could look at you forever.”

Steve gave him a blinding smile from around his thumb, licking across the pad before letting it go. “Promise?”

“Yes, baby.”

Their lips crashed together again and Eddie’s hands went to his hair to hold him where he wanted him and around his waist to pull him closer, their hard lengths meeting between their layers. Eddie knew this was not good for his brand new tattoo but he couldn’t break their desperate kiss.

Steve kissed down his jaw to his neck, nosing his hair out of his way.

“Stevie baby, gotta-“

He laughed at the petulant whine he received. “Settle down, just don't want to fuck up all the work I did, even though I know redoing it again would be enjoyable for both of us. Turn over for me and I’ll take care of you.”

Working together, they arranged Steve to stand bending over the table and Eddie slid close behind him, licking across his hole and sliding a hand into the front of his jock.

“Please, please Eds- oh my god,” Steve wailed as he fucked himself back and forth, not sure if he wanted to rut himself into his mouth or his hand.

“I got you, sweetheart. Come for me and I’ll clean you all up and take you home.”

Steve arched back into him again. “That’s the hottest thing anyone’s ever said. Ever.”

Eddie swiped his tongue over his spasming hole again, making him shudder. “I think you’re a bit biased right now, but I’ll remember that.”

Ignoring his own throbbing cock, he slurped and stroked until Steve made the hottest noise he’d ever heard (he was definitely biased), coming hard into his sexy little jockstrap.

“That’s my good boy,” Eddie growled, nosing between his legs against his clothed spent balls and making Steve whimper.

“Stay still and let me wrap your fucking tattoo and then I’m dragging you home.”

“Y’ssir,” Steve slurred, slumping down onto his hands on the table, poking his ass up further into the air.

“Can’t believe you rode your motorcycle to get a tattoo on your ass, you absolute menace,” Eddie huffed.

“I was hopeful I would be getting a ride after.”

Eddie cackled along with Steve as they took the short drive to his place.

“As if there would be any other possible outcome with you throwing your gorgeous self at me.”

Steve shrugged, undoing his seatbelt. “Could’ve been. I’m not everyone’s cup of tea.”

Eddie looked at him like he was insane. “You mean, like, blind people? Lesbians?”

Giggling, Steve stuck his tongue out playfully. Eddie pretended to reach for it. “I’m a hit with lesbians, for the record.”

“Of course you are, handsome. Now get inside before I embarrass both of us in this parking lot.”

Wanting to get out of the shop quickly and without many eyes on them, Eddie had persuaded Steve just to put the sweatpants back on and snuck out the back staff door. Steve had confirmed that the rest of his appointments for the evening had also been fake (Benedict Phalange and Jack M. Ihoff, he needed to get more creative friends honestly) so they could run off without guilt.

Eddie left Steve waiting impatiently on his doorstep as he rushed around his apartment throwing dirty clothes into his closet, gathered all the trash from his coffee table and as a last resort sprayed air freshener everywhere.

Pulling the door back open with a flourish, he ducked his head down and bowed, putting on a voice. “My liege, welcome to my very humble abode. Me casa es the landlords casa, unfortunately. But it’s supposedly earthquake proof.”

Steve snickered at him, pulling him from his low bow and pushing him against the door. “Well let’s test that out, shall we?”

“Fuck, I’m keeping you,” Eddie groaned before meeting his hungry kiss. “Let’s go test out the shower first.”

After pushing and pulling each other to the bathroom and losing clothes along the way, after they’d wriggled Eddie’s pants off, Steve looked him over with wide eyes.

Eddie felt unnerved for a long moment before Steve made a low appreciative noise and ran a finger from the ink on his throat to the metal through his nipple and gasped as his eyes trailed lower.

“It’s yours?”

Eddie frowned, almost gasping himself as Steve dropped to his knees in front of him, then realized what had grabbed Steve’s attention. “Oh. You didn’t know?”

Steve traced along the harpy tattoo above his knee. “I didn’t know it was on you, Mr. Humble. Letting me rave over it and you didn’t feel the need to tell me you tattooed it onto yourself? That’s beyond badass, Eds.”

Maybe finally cluing into the fact that he was kneeling in front of him, Steve looked up from under his lashes at him, pressing a quick wet kiss to the tattoo before hooking his fingers in the elastic of Eddie’s boxer briefs to pull them down.

“Is- are- oh my god.”

“Not sure I can answer that one, honey,” Eddie laughed.

Steve continued staring until he finally thumbed at the metal through the head of his cock. “How do you keep getting hotter?” He pulled back, shedding his (Eddie’s) sweatpants and jockstrap in one motion. “C’mon, I need that in my mouth right the fuck now.”

Eddie would be embarrassed for the noise that came out of him as Steve sunk to his knees the moment they stepped in the shower, but then his brain was being sucked out of his dick. He threw one hand out to hold himself up and slid the other into Steve’s thick hair as his hot mouth slid down his length.

He realized his eyes had slid closed and forced them back open to see the gorgeous man below him. “Fuck, baby. Look so good like this,” he gasped.

Steve pushed himself up another inch with a high whine before pulling off. “Can’t take your huge cock.”

Eddie thought his legs were going to drop out from under him as Steve dived back down to swallow around the head of his dick. “Jesus Christ, where did you come from?”

All he could do was try to stay standing, almost sure his brain was going down the shower drain watching Steve as he lapped against the piercing or his cute little furrowed brow as he tried his best to take him down to the hilt.

“Don’t hurt yourself, sweetheart. Doing so good.”

He huffed, sending air across the head of his cock and he jolted a bit, making his piercing slide across Steve’s lips. “Just want all of it,” he pouted.

Unable to help himself, he grabbed a better handful of the hair on the back of Steve’s head and pulled his mouth back onto him. “Tap me if you need to,” he rasped.

Steve made a pretty keening noise and blinked up at him.

Pushing forward only a little further than Steve had been able to take before, he waited for Steve to take a long breath before fucking into his mouth.

“Such a good boy,” he couldn’t help but groan as his throat opened up for him. Carefully inching forward again, he rocked back and forth, leaving only a couple inches untouched.

Steve pushed against his thigh and he quickly backed off, but Steve gasped out, “So fucking hot, Eds. Do it harder. And I want all of it. Make me take it.”

Eddie’s knees almost gave out. “The fucking mouth on you, pretty boy.”

The only response he received was a low hum around the head of his cock before Steve pushed himself down onto this length and looked up expectantly at him.

He watched his face intently as he used the grip on his wet hair to pull him steadily forward. Sliding past his perfect lips, he moaned as they met the curly hair at the base and Steve swallowed around him.

“That’s it baby,” he huffed, yanking him off and letting him suck in a shallow breath before rocking all the way back in. Tears joined the water dripping down his cheeks but he wouldn’t let Eddie stop, whining and shoving himself back down even as his gag reflex fought him. “God, I lo-“ he shook his head. It was too soon. “Gunna come, Stevie.”

Steve bobbed his head and kept humming and swallowing around him until Eddie saw stars and reached above him for the shower rod to hang on to as he came down his throat.

“Oh fuck,” he hissed as the soft tongue cleaned him up. Then he almost hit the floor again when Steve looked up at him with his big round eyes, wrapping both hands around his own hard dick, getting himself off while looking him up and down. “Come for me, beautiful. Then I’m chaining you to my bed. Never letting you go.”

“Ah! Eds!” Steve made eye contact with him as he shuddered through his release, finally leaning his forehead against Eddie’s hip to catch his breath.

Once they were cleaned up and dry, cuddled up in bed, Steve looked around searchingly and Eddie raised an eyebrow at him. “Where’re your chains?”

Days later after not getting to see each other due to their schedules and Eddie trying not to come on too strongly (honestly he’d ask Steve to move in with him if he didn’t think he would run away screaming), Steve picked him up for Argyle’s party.

“I don’t know that I consented to a motorcycle ride,” Eddie smirked. God, don’t get hard. Don’t get hard.

“Parking over there is atrocious, this way we won’t have to walk a mile.”

Eddie kissed his cheek as he took the helmet held out for him. “Good thinking, sweetheart.”

He tried not to get too excited. But the vibration of the bike under him and holding on to Steve as he zipped through the city was exhilarating. Steve wiggled his hips back into him teasingly. He growled into his ear, “Be good.”

Steve shook his head and wiggled again. Eddie grabbed his hips and rutted his hard cock against his back. When that only made the wiggling continue, he looked around quickly before sliding his hand down between Steve’s legs.

Chuckling darkly against his shoulder as he gasped and revved the engine. “Don’t kill us, pretty, haven’t gotten to do everything I want to you yet.”

The hardness in his hand twitched and Steve slowed down the bike, turning a corner and taking them down a more deserted street.

“And don’t come,” he hissed as he squeezed a bit tighter.

They made it to Argyle’s in one piece miraculously, Steve whining at him as he hopped off the bike and pulled both of their helmets off to meet his lips.

“C’mon Stevie, before we get arrested in his front yard for indecent exposure.”

No one was surprised to see them walk in together, Eddie had been unable to stop talking about their developing relationship to anyone and everyone who would listen. Drew would jokingly make gagging noises at him and Gareth would loudly fake moan from next to him in the studio or bar.

“Ah our favorite pet project has arrived!” Argyle called out when he saw them, nudging Chrissy who was draped over his shoulder, apparently this meddling had brought them back together.

“Hey guys,” Chrissy beamed at them.

It was unbearably hot, but under the umbrellas and awning in the back of the house it was a bit more tolerable, and people were jumping in and out of the pool.

Eddie almost swallowed his tongue when Steve came out of the bathroom wearing a tiny sporty looking speedo and nothing else. He grabbed his elbow and pulled him back into the bathroom. “Are you trying to kill me? What is that?”

Steve just grinned. “It’s a pool party, babe. This is a bathing suit,” speaking slowly and deliberately like he was explaining something very complicated. “You wear it in the pool.”

“Uh huh, smart ass. What about keeping your new tattoo out of the sun? You’re pushing it, you’re already lucky I’m letting you swim at all.”

“Mmm, let me, Eds? What else do I have your permission to do?” Steve pulled him close by the waistband of his own plain black trunks.

“Fuck, you are trying to kill me,” he breathed, closing the distance between their lips. But after a quick kiss he pulled back. Looking into his eyes, he promised lowly, “Keep being a brat and you’ll end up bent over Argyle’s weird furniture. You have one free cheek.”

Someone knocked hard on the door and they jumped apart. One of Argyle’s friends snickered at them as they hurried out past him.

Steve continued teasing him incessantly throughout the party, dragging him into the pool and wrapping his arms and legs around him so Eddie could carry him around, after they’d gotten out and dried off he got back in then plopped his cold wet self right onto Eddie’s lap and got comfortable. Taking any opportunity to touch him, pulling him in for kisses mid-sentence with their friends if he felt like it, licking invisible crumbs from his fingers as he ate.

“This must be the famous Eddie, then,” a voice came from above them and Steve squawked as he jumped up to throw his arms around the person.

Eddie recognized her immediately from Steve’s instagram.

“Robin! I thought you couldn’t make it!” He was almost jumping up and down, Eddie found himself grinning just from how excited he was.

“Well I texted you a bunch, but it seems like you don’t have your phone.” She looked pointedly down to his tiny bathing suit.

Steve smirked at her and they shared a long look, seeming to have a conversation without talking.

“So Eddie, what are your intentions with my platonic soulmate?” Robin asked seriously as she dropped into the chair next to him. “How do you feel about him wanting six kids?”

Eddie looked quickly between them, throat going dry suddenly, “Uhhh, I mean, um-“

“Aww leave him alone, Bob. I’ve already been messing with him all day,” Steve laughed, plopping himself back into Eddie’s lap.

As the day went on, drinks were consumed and games played, Steve still finding any excuse to use Eddie as a chair and pressing his lips anywhere he could reach.

The final straw was when Steve plucked an ice cube from Eddie’s drink and as he watched, licked some of the dripping drink from it but instead of popping the entire thing in his mouth (which would’ve been hot enough on its own), he tucked it down the front of Eddie’s swim trunks.

Robin laughed at them as Eddie squeaked before grabbing Steve’s hand and pulling him into the house.

Steve’s wide grin told him everything he needed to know.

“Thought you liked being my good boy, why are you acting up?” He crowded close to him, cupping his face and making him meet his eyes.

“Want you, Eds, please,” Steve pouted and gave him big puppy dog eyes.

“You’ve been sitting on my dick all day, honey. What else do you need? Huh?”

Steve pulled away and Eddie almost pouted himself, but then he just looked around before asking, “Are there bedrooms here?”

Barking a quick relieved laugh, he took his hand again and they ran up the stairs. Locking the door and pushing Steve against it, he met his desperate kiss and lined up their hips with a groan.

“Take this tiny thing off, babe.” He pulled at the hip of his speedo and Steve giggled.

Together they got their suits off and Eddie shoved him until he landed on the bed. He pulled open the nightstand and his eyebrows shot up. “Good for you, Argyle.”

He threw a condom and a small bottle of lube onto the bed and left the rest alone.

“Yessss, want your huge cock in me,” Steve hissed as he squirmed around on the bed.

“Settle down, Stevie, I think I promised you something else if you were going to keep being a brat,” he taunted.

“Want that, too.” He maneuvered himself onto his knees with his back to Eddie.

Momentarily distracted by his own art on the expanse of skin before him, his eyes then traveled up and he let out a deep groan. “Holy fuck, Stevie. How haven’t I seen this one?”

Eddie traced over the delicate lettering right under his perfect dimples in the small of his back, his jaw actually dropping. “You are just a pretty little babygirl, aren’t you?”

Steve arched his back with a high whine as he dragged his finger down between his cheeks. Without warning he slapped across his bare cheek and chuckled at his little squeak.

“More, c’mon,” he taunted, rising up on his hands on the bed.

Eddie hummed thoughtfully and swatted harder against him a handful of times in quick succession before grabbing a handful of cheek in a harsh grip, enjoying the rough inhale of breath and little whimper he received.

He continued spanking down his thigh and swatting over his perfect tramp stamp until everything was a warm pink and Steve was writhing and widening his legs so he’d get a peak of his pretty hole.

“Please,” Steve whined prettily. “Need your cock, please. Oh fuck!” Eddie smacked once more hard across his ass.

Quickly grabbing the lube, he chuckled as Steve flopped down onto his face on the bed, arching his back and immediately showing off his ass. Eddie swiped his wet fingers across it, trying to prepare him quickly as his own dick screamed at him to just shove inside.

Finally after Steve was a quivering whimpering mess on the bed, he removed his fingers and rolled the condom on.

“Oh, c-could, um,” Steve stammered.

“Why’re you gettin’ shy on me now, pretty? What do you want?”

He huffed, half hiding his face into the sheet under him, and Eddie tried as best he could to patiently wait for him to say something.

“Can, you know, can we do it the other way? Wanna see you. Hold onto you.” Steve couldn’t look at him while he said it, and Eddie wanted to go throttle whoever had told this gorgeous man that he didn’t deserve to be taken care of.

“C’mere, Stevie,” he cooed, and his eyes shot to his, widening when he realized Eddie was serious. He turned over, sitting up on the edge of the bed and Eddie knelt in front of him, pulling him in close. “Gunna treat you so well, babygirl. You already have me wrapped right around your little finger. Of course we can do romantic and soft,” he laughed.

Steve’s eyebrows turned down and he gave him a little pout. “Didn’t say anything about soft,” he grumbled.

They laughed together, and Eddie pressed a kiss to the side of his mouth, then his forehead. “Gunna have me eating out of your hand, aren’t you babygirl? Gunna have me completely whipped. I can already tell.”

Steve simply shrugged and pulled him in for a deeper kiss, wrapping his arms and legs around him. Finally he pulled away, gasping, “Please fuck me already. I can’t wait anymore. And Robin is very needy, she’ll come look for us soon.”

Eddie snorted. “Oh, she’s needy, huh? Must’ve learned that from you.”

He watched as he got his gorgeous self spread out across the bed, fluffing pillows behind his head and threw one playfully at Eddie who helped him shove it under his hips.

He teased him for a long moment, dragging the pierced head of his cock around his hole and over his balls until he was whining and grasping handfuls of sheet. The first push inside made his eyes cross, holding on tight to his thick thighs under his hands. “Like you were made for me, baby.”

Leaning over him, he kissed down his neck and over his nipples, giving them extra attention when it made him clench around him and cry out. “Oh yeah, baby? Sensitive little things, huh? Maybe we’ll see if Argyle can pierce them for you. Or better yet, I’ll get him to show me how, and I’ll be the one to make you even prettier.”

“Oh fuck, yes, oh my god,” Steve wailed as he met the harried thrusts. “I don’t know how you’re real. God I love- love your fucking cock.”

Eddie hummed into his neck. Not the cleanest coverup he’d heard, but he hid his smirk by dragging his teeth across his collarbone. “Going to give me a complex, sweet thing. All this big talk.”

Steve shook his head petulantly, reaching down to feel where he was being split open, squeezing around the base where it wasn’t even all the way in. “It’s so big, Eds. Like even if you weren’t so sweet and the hottest thing on two legs, I’d give it up just for this.”

“Oh, that’s very romantic, honey,” he huffed. Deciding he could talk too well while getting fucked, he pushed at his leg and pulled it over his shoulder, opening him wider and laughing as Steve cried out.

Able to push all the way in now, he got lost in the back and forth, gazing between Steve’s blissed out face and watching himself disappear into him.

“Can- oh! Can feel you in my throat. So deep, Eds. Gunna come.”

Eddie echoed Steve’s groan as his big hands came up to play with his own nipples, Eddie encircling his leaking cock and matching his thrusts.

Steve came hard between them, his gorgeous noises and the clenching around his dick sending Eddie over the edge right behind. Slumping down onto him as they tried to catch their breath, Eddie smirked into his skin when his legs wrapped around his hips.

“I’m not going anywhere, babygirl.”

Surprisingly none of their friends came to look for them, and eventually they had to face the music.

Robin rolled her eyes at them as they opened the sliding glass door to the backyard, and cried out when Steve rushed around to pool towards her.

“No running by the pool, dingus! You’d think you’d be more careful after your crazy embarrassing accident at state.”

Eddie frowned, his attention switching back to Steve as he groaned and went to cover Robin’s mouth. But the secret had already been spilled.

“But I guess Eddie could just cover up more scars,” she giggled, narrowly avoiding Steve’s flailing arms to smirk over at Eddie.

Finally clicking all the pieces together, he found his voice. “You told me it was a motorcycle accident!”

[antianakin]

Am I the only one who just lost any and all love for newer Star Wars material due to Jedi hate ? Like- the only merch or show or even FANDOM topic I get involved in is clone wars stuff and MAYBE TBB. Like- why would I want the watch shows who attempt to rewritte canon and portray the very heroes of Star Wars as the bad guys ?

Why would I want to watch shows that assassinate characters left and right (looking at you, Ahsoka and Sabine) ? Why would I want to buy merch of characters who I not only NOT care about, but who also are used as meta mouthpieces for stupid Jedi hate ?

I think there's TONS of good newer Star Wars material, to be honest.

I loved the Kenobi show and it is arguably one of the most pro Jedi pieces of media to have existed since the Prequels films. Aside from one itty bitty somewhat awkward word choice in one line of one episode, there is absolutely NOTHING in that show that can be used to indict the Jedi or blame them for anything and it is arguably one of the only shows to really spend time MOURNING the Jedi and recognizing the horror of what was done to them. Rebels comes closest after this, but its structure makes it a little less visceral than the Kenobi show was to me.

I really adore Visions and I recognize that this is sort-of Star Wars adjacent more than anything else, but SO LITTLE truly understands what makes Star Wars compelling as a story and really hits on those primary themes the way that Visions does. There's SO MUCH Jedi content in Visions and I remember people complaining about how much Jedi content was in Visions and other people responding that if you were given free reign to just play in the Star Wars sandbox with near zero restrictions on what you could make with it, you would probably ALSO immediately go for the psychic space wizards with laser swords. Who WOULDN'T? Visions also just genuinely has some of the most engaging and heart-wrenching stories to come out of Star Wars in a LONG while and it does it in these beautifully animated 15 minute packages. It's such a gem and I am so glad to be alive at the same time as Visions.

Rogue One is older now, but both Rogue One and Andor, despite having zero actual Jedi in them, really hinge on the themes from the Prequel trilogy about the tragedy in the Star Wars universe, stepping up when no one else will, choosing to be selfless and compassionate for the greater good, etc. Faith and hope are MASSIVE themes within these two works and even though there aren't any space wizards, good or evil, in either story, they feel like some of the most pro Jedi things Star Wars has come out with in a while based on thematic messages ALONE.

The Mandalorian's first two seasons actually have this absolutely BEAUTIFUL story about the selfless sacrifice of one man as he gives up everything in order to help this child find his way back to the culture he'd been ripped from. Everything AFTER that regarding Grogu and Din's storyline is a piece of shit (it's not explicitly anti-Jedi or anything, but it undoes a lot of the things that made their story so compelling and beautiful), but the first two seasons are genuinely GOOD and very pro Jedi in a lot of ways despite the lack of many actual Jedi characters.

The Book of Boba Fett is a terrible show for a LOT of reasons, but shockingly none of them have anything to do with its treatment of the Jedi. If it ever ends up with a season two, I desperately hope they leave Mace Windu's name the fuck out of it, but at this point it is a pretty Jedi neutral show if you're willing to deal with the rest of its bullshit.

Rebels is also somewhat older now, and it has a few lines here and there that are a tad more Jedi critical, but it is by and large VERY Jedi positive and does also follow a lot of the themes of selflessness and sacrifice that go along with being a Jedi. It also has themes of mercy and patience and facing your fears in Sabine's storyline that got entirely thrown away in her later storyline. Just thought that was worth pointing out. For reasons.

TBB is also fairly Jedi neutral, but its treatment of the clones is basically the clone version of being anti Jedi, so I'm not sure it's actually any better. It just traded hating on the Jedi to hating on the clones, and I find that just as distasteful.

I can't really speak to things like comics and novels much since I don't tend to consume them really. I've read a few of the adult novels in the High Republic Phase I and the first one was genuinely very good, but there were some relatively heavy-handed Jedi critical themes within the third book of Phase I (The Fallen Star) that put me off of it a little. I haven't continued into Phase II or III at all, so I have no idea if those themes got continued in later books. I've heard generally good things about the Padawan book, I think.

The Cal Kestis video games, Fallen Order and Survivor, also have their small Jedi critical moments, but much like Rebels, it has these massive overarching themes and messages about compassion and selflessness and sacrifice and facing your fears and mercy. They are immensely Jedi positive in a lot of ways and I really enjoyed both of them.

So out of everything I have seen (and know about) the only stuff that's truly heinously and insultingly anti-Jedi is the Ahsoka show, the Acolyte, and Tales of the Jedi. Three shows and like 30% of one book. Out of a list of like ten different shows and one film and some books and video games. It's not even really HALF of the content we've been getting recently.

A lot of people talk about the Disney era like it's ruined Star Wars, or like nothing it releases has ever been good. But it just straight up isn't true. It's a little insulting to all of the genuinely wonderful work that is being done by all of these other creators to just brush aside everything that's been coming out recently as awful and bad because some of the MOST recent things have been pretty explicitly hateful towards the Jedi. It's not fun that we had the Ahsoka show immediately followed by the Bad Batch followed by the Acolyte. I hate that, too, it feels like we're on this neverending shitshow of stories explicitly aimed at hating a group of characters for no obvious good reason. But I don't think that the last 6 months or so of bullshit should overshadow some of the really beautiful stories we HAVE gotten within the last several years.

If you feel like things are getting difficult, maybe do a "good Star Wars" marathon of sorts. Watch the Prequels, followed by the Kenobi show, then Andor, then Rebels, then Rogue One, then the Original trilogy. This one long beautiful story of people stepping up to fight against selfishness and greed and darkness no matter what.

Or go rewatch Visions or read some of your favorite fanfics and remember all the things about Star Wars that are just universally cool and compelling across the world. Hell, you can try writing something of your own! Anything! A lot of my AU concepts stemmed from spite and really helped me feel a little bit better about Star Wars when it sometimes felt like I was just surrounded by the parts of it I liked the least. Go buy yourself a cool t-shirt or some fun jewelry. Find some pretty stickers and put it on a water bottle or an enamel pin to put on a canvas tote bag or a corkboard.

Curating your fandom experience goes beyond just the internet. There's a reason I am boycotting the Acolyte and it isn't because I think Disney or its creators are going to care at all. I'm doing it for ME, because I had such a shitty time watching the Ahsoka show and it made me so miserable each week that I seriously think I will be better off just leaving it the hell alone and just absorbing whatever ends up crossing my dash from a distance. I only participate in Star Wars fandom servers that I feel safe in and only really get into discussions with personal friends who I know well. If participating in Star Wars fandom is making you sad, maybe take a step back or find a way to create your own corner of fandom that feels better. Ignore the damn Ahsoka show, pretend it never existed. Ignore the Acolyte. Ignore Tales of the Jedi. Ignore Filoni-related bullshit. Focus on the parts you DO like, or give yourself the space to remember why you liked it in the first place.

[dust-jacket-analysis]

Watched the London special, and now I'm going to word vomit here, to then eventually (potentially) refine this post into some solid analysis. (Spoilers for the special, obviously)

First off, holy fuck that was brutal. I mean, Marinette?? Girl??/ Get therapy??? I don't think there was a moment I stopped crying. Even when things weren't necessarily sad, I was still crying?

Just the whole scene of Marinette telling Adrien his father died, and that he was hero (tf he was *eyebrow raise*) was soul-crushing. Him lashing out was so... so good. Good writing genuinely. (Also everyone who got mad at Adrien for jumping the gun and blaming Marinette, fuck off *crafting a future post in my mind as we speak*).

The fight scenes were top tier. The part where Marinette leaps through two of the little time tunnel portal things, dodging Lila, was BRILLIANT. Her sass while doing so? God she's so cool.

Also Lila's breakdown was wild. No analysis, just shock (as if there's any semblance of analysis in any of this post).

The end scene was amazing! The little hug and then the "pound it" at the end had me legitimately bawling like a baby. Rip current animation.

Now, I loved the special. But I have BIG grievances. Well, just one big grievance.

WHERE TF WAS ADRIEN THIS WHOLE SPECIAL?

Like why did the writers, once again, backseat him? The thing I wanted most was to see Adrien grieving and coping with the death of his father and how that would impact him as Chat Noir the whole time. I wanted to see him talk more about it, and see him and ladybugs interactions the whole movie.

Instead, It was the fucking Marinette show the whole time. This is not Marinette hate, she is my daughter and I will protect her from all the haters. No this is "hate" to the writers.

They do this constantly and it pisses me off. Because the show started with them clearly being co-leads. Yeah, Marinette was a bit more focused on, but it was clearly supposed to have some semblance of balance. And then season five hits and *boom* Adrien's screentime (Correction: His quality screentime) plummets. And it's never been more clear than in this special.

Like the entirety of this whole arc plot revolves around Adrien. His father is the main villain, his father's motive is to revive his mother, who died using the peacock miraculous. which was used to create him because he's a sentimonster. Mayura is Nathalie, his sort of surrogate mother who is in love with his father. His house is literally the location of that final battle.

WHICH HE"S BENCHED FOR WHAT THE FUCK

And now, in the aftermath of all that, he's benched too. No participation, hardly any screentime. It's sad, disheartening.

All in all, this special has summed up the last couple of years of the show/franchise pretty well. Great emotional impact, more plot, and more intense themes. But also the disproportionate amount of focus on Marinette and the disservice to Adrien, all at the cost of good writing.

Still, I did love the special. It was good. I just think it had the opportunity to give fans what (I think) they wanted and could've been great.

[deripmaver]

Casca and Griffith: Before and After The Eclipse

Back by unpopular demand: ME!!!!

My main MO in Berserk fandom is Sad Casca Hours, where I make posts that literally just exist to make you feel sad about Casca, because I feel sad about Casca and why should I be the only one who has to suffer?

To me, one of the absolute most heartbreaking aspects of Berserk is Casca and her (platonic) relationship with Griffith. It is genuinely impossible for me to look at the way she talks about him, thinks about him, and interacts with him in the Golden Age without feeling a lump in my throat. I think this particular relationship is overlooked - and honestly, I get why. It's just so fucking sad, you can't think about it and also expect to have a good day after LOLLLL.

I want to take a look at their relationship by comparing and contrasting two specific moments in it: Casca's first meeting with Griffith as a child, and Casca's first meeting with Griffith as Elaine, post-eclipse. I also want to go briefly into how, textually, Berserk handles atonement and forgiveness.

We're here to have a bad time!

Griffith Meets Casca as a Child

Griffith, as the young commander of a mercenary army, comes across Casca as the nobleman who purchased her from her family attempts to rape her. As Casca tells Guts looking back, it was as though an angel came down to her, a powerless girl, and gave her the agency to fight for herself.

It's not JUST that he saves her from the noble, it's that he puts the sword in her hand and shows her how she can fight for herself.

Casca's life up until that point has been marked by terror after terror, to the point where the daily injustices become banal, just part of her every day existence. Her family is helpless except to flee when bandits ride through their village. Then, at the age of twelve, she is offered up as an unwilling sacrifice for the good of all them. When a noble offers her family money to take away one of the mouths to feed, they have little choice but to accept. It's not ever specified how she felt about this at the time, and it's not clear if her parents have some inkling that the man they're selling their daughter to has ill intent - but what is clear is that there's no way for them to refuse the offer. After being sold off, the noble attempts to rape her - yet another instance of powerlessness.

Griffith giving her the sword might actually be the first time in Casca's entire life that she has any kind of power. It's key that he lets her kill the noble, both because of how it gives Casca agency over her own fate, again for the first time in her entire life, and because it reinforces the recurring theme in Berserk of atonement coming through direct confrontation with the people you hurt, in this case the sub-theme "everyone gets to kill their rapist."

It's also important to point out that Griffith's motivation here is seemingly completely altruistic. He hates that the nobles exert their power over the most helpless among them, and he gleefully takes the opportunity to humiliate the noble by turning the tables on him. Casca at this point is malnourished, and a girl, and completely unable to fight - there's no reason for him to welcome her into his band. There's no way he could have known how good of a fighter she would become, and how loyal, but in this moment he just says that if she wants to come with him, the decision is hers. This points to Griffith, in the early Golden Age, genuinely pushing for a more egalitarian world than the ones the nobles currently control (though I maintain that he always envisioned himself as being the supreme ultimate authority of that world as opposed to destroying the hierarchy entirely).

Griffith Meets Casca After the Eclipse

Casca, after the eclipse, is in a shockingly similar position to where she was when Griffith met her for the first time.

She's traumatized from sexual violence, unable to fight, unable to even talk, and helpless to the violence of the world around her. It's not quite right to compare her directly to twelve year old Casca, because child Casca was mentally sound and was capable of learning combat - but then the comparison isn't exactly right also because of the history between Griffith and Casca, and because of the years of loyalty and service Casca gave Griffith.

It's always complicated to analyze how, exactly, Griffith felt about Casca before the eclipse. For my part, I see him as viewing her akin to a favorite tool - he felt genuine affection for her, but in a sort of dehumanized way, while of course Casca saw him as beyond human and even godlike. He saw her as someone he could pluck up and put wherever he needed, and he took it for granted that she would always be by his side regardless of what he did. Honestly, I do think he geniunely liked her.

His actions towards her during the eclipse, and immediately before, are a reflection of having that stability shaken. When she attempts to exert her own agency by forming her own relationship with Guts, Griffith is suddenly made aware that she's stopped acting just like his favorite tool, and I think this makes him angry. His rape of her is in some ways reminding her of her "place" - she is being treated like an object both because of the rape itself, and because the main reason he rapes her is to hurt Guts. He is purely using her as a tool for his petty, malicious vengeance.

Then, two years later, he is reunited with her on the Hill of Swords.

I'll post these panels given the slightest opportunity lol. Griffith doesn't expect to save Casca - he moves completely unconsciously to protect her, and then when his heart still throbs upon seeing her and Guts, he says it must be because of the child inhabiting his body. This is of course up to interpretation - I don't fully buy it, because Griffith has never been honest about his feelings.

What I need to point out with this scene, though, is that Griffith does not for a second consider Casca. Everything on the Hill of Swords is about Guts, when arguably Casca is the one who was hurt the worst during the eclipse, and who was the most loyal to Griffith. For goodness' sake, she's the only reason Griffith still had a BotH to sacrifice in the first place. Griffith tells Guts that he no longer feels anything for anyone, and after saving her from the rock fall, Griffith does not even spare a glance towards her. She genuinely seems to mean nothing to him.

Interestingly, as Griffith leaves, again not even deigning to look at Casca, he gives one of the only examples of victim blaming in the entirety of Berserk, by saying that Guts should have expected what happened.

Griffith in the Golden Age seemed intimately aware of the dangers a young girl alone could face, and he wants to protect Casca from that despite her being a perfect stranger. Griffith after his rebirth must, then, also have some awareness of the dangers in the world facing a disabled woman like Elaine, particularly a branded one - and yet he leaves her to those dangers, uncaring of how she struggles under them.

The purpose of this comparison isn't to make an argument one way or the other about how much Femto is the same as Griffith. Just for clarity's sake, my stance is that Femto and Griffith are one and the same, and that all of Femto's actions (rape included) are actions taken by Griffith.

What I really just want to highlight here is the pure, unfeeling cruelty with which Griffith treats Casca after the eclipse. KLSHGSLKJ as if sexually assaulting her and completely destroying her mentally isn't enough, his apathy towards her after becomes a near constant torment as much as his outright hatred towards Guts. It must be noted that he offers Guts and Rickert a place in Falconia, while Casca gets no such acknowledgement. It's as though, to him, she doesn't even exist, while her entire life has been consumed by the trauma of his betrayal during the eclipse. Isn't that just painfully realistic, though? How often do the people who hurt you the most go on in life, unaware of the deep pain you feel every day?

A quick note I'd like to make is that, of course, we're intentionally not being given any sort of look into NeoGriffith's mind, save for the slightest hints in the Hill of Swords. We don't know if he does harbor any sort of thoughts about Casca, if he's intentionally avoiding thinking about her due to guilt (wouldn't that be nice), or if she genuinely means nothing to him with his heart apparently frozen. While I do want to point out that we shouldn't take what Griffith says at face value, I find myself struggling to imagine what internal monologue could justify his treatment of Casca, both during the eclipse and after.

I think if you're reading this you're wondering why tf I'm getting so emo about Griffith, who canonically raped Casca and killed everyone she ever knew and loved in front of her (save Guts), being mean to Casca in the aftermath. Like, do I think he should be nice to her? Pretend like nothing happened? No, of course not - what I want is that he didn't assault her in the first place, not after how much she idolized him and loved him. It's brutal to have watched that happen, and to watch the utter apathy with which he looks at her after, to the point that I wonder how he could have ever cared about her if this is what he would do.

As for protecting her as Elaine from the dangers in the world, am I really suggesting he should have plucked her up and away from Guts to hide her away from all the monsters in the world?

SPEAKING OF WHICH.......................

Griffith's Kidnapping of Casca

ohhhhh nmy god oh my fucking godhksdjfghnvlskfdj

Griffith left Casca to the dangers of the world on the Hill of Swords, and then the minute the fact that she's apart from him presents a weakness to him (ie his uncontrolled travel to visit her and Guts during his full moon transformations into their son), he just... Kidnaps her.

Casca has just revived, and has this sweet close-knit support system, and Griffith pulls her away from all of that because, to him, she is just a tool that he can pick up and place wherever he needs her. Again, we don't know what's going through Griffith's head as he does this, but we very much do see the way it impacts Casca, and that to me overrides whatever internal justification Griffith may have for his actions - if he even bothers to justify it to himself.

Smug bastard.

The utter dehumanization that Casca is subjected to by Griffith in chapter 372 is so... cruel. It's just cruel. There's no other word for it. After everything, he has her drugged in Falconia, and again he won't even deign to look at her. I have a whole post on Ch 372 here where I go through this in depth.

Before everything, Casca used to look at Griffith like this.

In Berserk, in order to be forgiven, characters need to go through an internal transformation that relates to the harm they previously caused. We look at Farnese, who was going to have Casca tried for heresy, and who wound up being Casca's protector and humbling herself by learning magic from Schierke. Then, with Guts, after assaulting Casca he makes a point of changing his whole ethos and allowing Farnese and Serpico to join him. His narrative punishment for this, also, is directly related to his relationship with Casca. She is terrified of him and refuses to be near him, to the point where he can't even help her be revived. Not to say he's fully forgiven, or that he SHOULD be fully forgiven until he can speak with revived Casca, but these are examples of how Berserk treats forgiveness and atonement. I really recommend this essay by @imhaitusncarnate on Guts and toxic masculinity.

Griffith, while running Falconia as an apparent utopia, has done absolutely nothing like that - and his interactions with Casca in particular are just absolutely horrific, torment after torment like she's not even a person to him. I think this is meant to set him apart from characters who truly seek to atone for the things they've done. With Guts, he's flawed and he fucks up again and again as he tries to protect Casca. With Griffith, he won't even acknowledge her as she's drugged and helpless in his "paradise."

It's so incredibly painful to look at their first meeting where Griffith saves her, and puts agency into her hands for the first time in her life, and then to see how he treats her now. That, I suppose, is the crux of this essay - in many ways I think Griffith's morality as a character is represented in how he treats Casca, and to overlook that (and to overlook her) is to miss some of the most important overarching themes in Berserk. In fairness, I think this goes for Guts as well. He's narratively supported when he's caring for Casca, and narratively punished when he isn't.

There can be some arguments that this treatment is simply because Miura doesn't care about women, but genuinely I don't buy that. I think there's plenty of textual evidence that, while flawed at times, Miura even from Conviction Arc intended Casca and her trauma to be a key player in both Guts' and Griffith's character arcs.

I don't think you need to be reminded every day of how horribly Griffith treats Casca post-eclipse because not everyone has an overabundance of melancholic humors like I do, but I think it's important to acknowledge it exists and not chalk it up to misogyny on Miura's end.

I think, eventually, Casca will have a moment where she takes agency back into her own hands, in contrast to the moment where Griffith helped her all those years ago. I also think, at some point, Griffith will have to really look at Casca again. It'll be interesting, and heartbreaking, to see what happens then.

[inamindfarfaraway]

Stumbled across your post on Carmilla and Cain from one of my favorite artist and just wanted to say that I loved that post incredibly!!

I loved the way you articulated the ability for free will to shatter heavens expectations! It had me thinking about free will in general so thank you for sharing that goodness!

Thank you! This analysis just came to me as a fun little observation, I wasn’t expecting it to gain so much traction. Free will is very thematically important to Hazbin Hotel, isn’t it? Lucifer believed in the good it could do, but accidentally created evil by giving it to humanity and fell for it. Since then he’s seen all the pain free will can cause and become embittered. Charlie, however, believes like he used to and fought for human souls passionately and selflessly enough to bring him back around. The Elder Angels who ordered the Exterminations and the Exorcists who carry them out seem to alternately hate and fear free will’s power, and by their indiscriminate condemnation of sinners as inherently irredeemable, not want to acknowledge it at all.

If the theory that Adam could live on as a sinner in Hell turns out to be true, I’d love to see his character and thoughts on his mortal family and free will explored, because he must have SO much baggage, which could explain (though not excuse) him being The Worst. An interesting detail in the backstory Charlie reads is that he’s never actually stated to eat the forbidden fruit. We see Eve take it, but not him. Maybe the reason that he’s in Heaven, but we never see or hear of Eve or their children in either afterlife, is that in this canon’s version of Genesis, he’s obedient and didn’t commit the original sin, only to be cast out anyway. Regardless of what exactly happens in Eden, he and Eve are forced to fend for themselves in the wilderness. Suddenly they need survival instincts. They can bleed and starve and get sick and loads of animals want to eat them. They have existential dread. Not to mention the marital tension. Why? Because the same angel who stole his first wife messed with his second one! As a result, people can sin. They can hurt each other. This allows Cain to invent murder on his brother. He’s then cursed to wander the Earth, eternally living with his guilt and grief. Oh, and where can dead souls live on now? Where might Abel be trapped forever? Hell, a dimension made of evil, everything bad about the new and degraded human experience taken to the ultimate extreme. You’ll never guess why it exists (Lucifer. It’s Lucifer again). So Adam loses two kids with one stone that was indirectly thrown by one fucking bird guy. Can you imagine how you would feel, having lived that life?

You would have issues. A lot of issues.

No wonder he scorns redemption so much. In his eyes, free will is synonymous with sin - with suffering. But thinking damned souls to be evil incarnate at least lets him take vengeance. It lets him feel the wrathful satisfaction of physically stabbing and hacking his way through representatives of the force that cost him paradise. Broke his family. Killed his child. Maybe he was a genuinely good person when he died. For the most part. Maybe stewing in all that unprocessed trauma while watching the horrors of human history unfold and being venerated and indulged in the perfect afterlife without any of his family changed him for the worse. If you can have a redemption arc in Hell, you can have a corruption arc in Heaven.

After all, Lucifer lost faith in humanity over time. But he has Charlie. Adam’s ‘daughters’ in Heaven are the Exorcists (he calls them “[his] girls” and names them, so he probably creates them), of which I bet Lute was the first. That’s a really twisted dynamic. Like, “From now on, my kids are killing people on MY terms”. Lute having parallels with Charlie makes her being the new main villain even better!

This got out of hand. What I mean to say is, the first human family and how they relate to the theme of free will have huge potential for exploration and development. And if Adam is reborn as a sinner, it would be precisely the Hazbin Hotel blend of heartbreaking and hilarious to have him reunite with Eve, Abel, Seth, etc. in Hell and they’re all like “What. The FUCK?” and his whole horrible personality just collapses in on itself.