#i wont use it much tbf but it is fun!!!

[jupitercl0uds-art]

ibis paint animation is fun

[mukuberry]

i miss the milgram confessions blog i want somewhere to put my stupid opinions and discourse on milgram while staying anonymous

[arolesbianism]

I've just been playing the new cotl update for most of the day and I'm so so close to being done with the main new story bits I think but it's also past midnight but also I'm so excited idk if I'll be able to sleep but also god damn do I need to sleep

[patchesjam]

My MCC Video Rant, sorry its a bit long :)

So first off, the video itself is a bit crap. The first 2 mins are just introduction waffle, they then talk about a UI change for 2 mins. They’ve changed it from the typical mcc style to fit the mcci UI a bit more, to ‘improve viewer experience’. I personally don't like the change, for me it's a bit... busy. They then spend 3 of the remaining 5 mins mins advertising merch and mcci. Only about 1 min of the 8 min long video is about actual updates to mcc.

The actual updates, like the ones that actually matter and change the game are in the comments for some reason??

This is all information that are actual updates, none of it hinted at all in the video but just commented below. 

Skybattle’s update is truly confusing. Let me explain, currently there a a few raw pvp games (battlebox, sb, sg) and they all prioritise something different, BB is teamwork in rapid environments, SB is kills and SG is survival. With the nerfing of SB kills it turns it into a hunting and killing game to a hiding game. It also creates ridiculous scenarious where, for example with past scores adjusted, someone with 10 kills can come 3rd (dream mcc24) and someone who dies 1st each round, with zero kills, gets 64 coins (ranboo mcc17) and someone who gets 5 kills comes 2nd behind someone with 2 kills (Krtzzy and 5up, mcc 20).

It also, crucially, completely nerfs the ability for surpise comebacks and popoffs - for example, Joel Smallishbeans, not exactly known for pvp but he had a very impressive run getting 5 kills in mcc19 and gets just 260 coins with this update. Instead of potentially getting lucky, or a good opportunity you now have to just try and survive to the end. 

Battlebox’s update is a little bit of a nothingburger, they are just adding blocks to all maps which, although probably a bit more fun and makes things interesting. They are also releasing new maps throughout the season - but no major overhaul. Not that it particularly needed one either. 

One thing to note is that they mention that the blocks will be ‘brown, not team coloured, so you won’t mistake them for concrete’. However, several contestants are colourblind.  

In the game, it’d be extremely easy to mistake brown construction blocks, for both red and orange concrete. It probably wont end up effecting much at all - but when you can use the black colour, which is nearly universal it doesnt make any sense at all. I really hope it has a different texture or something because otherwise its just silly. 

Grid Runners changes is fine, probably pretty good change tbf. It does surprise me they havent announced new rooms, if there are no new rooms I’ll be dissapointed as I feel like theyre getting stale, but hopefully theyre leaving that as a surprise. 

However, I’m more pissed off at what they didnt announce. No mention of anything to do with Buildmart, which regardless of opinion, is one of the few games without big updates from S2. It’s also hated by 1/3 of the players and watchers so if they are focusing on improving player’s experiences surely this should be a focus? No mention of new GR rooms. No mention of SG scoring, which still wasn’t great from last season. No new games. No mention of new AR maps. No mention of Meltdown maps. No update to SOT. No mention of new maps for RSR. No PKT scoring update (desperately needed).

It’s just all a bit dissapointing, very few updates actaully talked about and released for the start of S3, where surely they should at least be hinted at. And instead, a nice 5 min long ad for their other products. 

[leafbatraccoon]

these were notes on my journal till yesterday but the news that we're getting the nectar-making skill with horses i figured i'd have some fun with it yet still be loud with my opinions, so i'll reblog with updates from time to time - im reposting with the original slot texts bc i was unhappy with my sleepless decision making 👍👍 | details under the cut if u wanna know but i'm a bit of a hater fyi |

longer seasons - i don't think this will happen, if miracle mods show up i might stamp them on in a different color but from what i've found it's pretty ingrained in the game that 28 days is the longest and if modders we're going to crack it they might've done it already but when im playing on pretty long life spans i just 💔💔 50+ days seasons would be the dream, but i'd be happy with 45 👀 10 outfits per category - same as before ig, this is probably super niche but i'm not satisfied and i hate having to get into cas to change it up so much bc in my head they have a closet each and i want to mix and match pieces in a realistic way 👚 pack refreshes - tbf, they did set up an expectation for that one which for the looks of it they are done with it; there's so much to fix, dine out in general, mermaids deserve some love in comparison to the other occults, updates to the bodies of water (going in the water in windenburg would be legendary), hu just bug fixes and compatiblity here and there would be nice (more hiking ? power walks in more places? its so weird how they are restricted to ONE place) now by world refreshes - i mean that in my dreams they go back and expand the maps they give us 🗺️🗺️ im greedy and want 2 neighbourhoods for my vampires & spellcasters, a lil more space in moonwood mill, granite falls & del sol valley too why not not gonna happen so i can say wtv an extra space in mt komorebi with apartments and since we're at it in san sequoia too; will def not happen working gallery - ig that might be coming too ?? idk my gallery sucks at times like it wont find any results when there are ?? and i know there are bc if i restrict more it might come up with something?? also just wanted better mechanism for the searches, i never had issues with disturbing content showing up tho so idk i heard some simmers weren't so lucky

bigger households - having to control or monitor 8 human/humanish sims is challeging enough but because pets, because having to fake apartments, because reasons; i use mccc but this workaround brings issues in cas so yea, wishlist ✔️ snakes // lizards - this would've been appropriate to launch with horses imo and i'd love if there had been interaction/compatibility from snakes in the wild and those taller friends & other small pets - small pet options in ts4 are non existent, sorry, birds only exist in that one tree (they are probably happy about not being captive actually), bunnies are also wild (personally im fine with it but i know that its a popular pet so i'd love if it was an option), reptiles don't exist (yet) and rodents are exclusive to the slap-in-the-face-of-this-community pack... 🐁🐇🐢🦎🐍🐦🐜 faeries or other fae kin - i feel like they've hinted at it for quite a while and we've seen it show up in quizzes too?? 🧚‍♀️ so i'm hopeful for this one and hope they are just trying to make sure they properly deliver on it bc there's a lot of fantasy enthusiasts and they deserve it & woodland creatures - personally would love it if the fae pack came with woodsy world and the addition of woodland creatures at least the spiritual kind (like unicorns or a white doe which they possibly alluded to with puzzles - it made me real giddy) bonus points if it has some outdoor retreat compatibility

owning more lots - after winning the lottery or keeping up with a family for generations, sims can accumulate quite a lot of money, there's not a lot of expenses in the life of a sim tbh, travelling only costs one loading screen, gardeing makes you rich and thats ok ig but being able to own a holiday house would be welcomed, not just a business 🏘️ nectar making - when tartosa came but no nectar making i was a bit let down, imagine making or acquiring a special batch for your wedding?? it would've been lovely and appropriate for a wedding pack but ... yeah anyway it comes with the horse pack for some reason so at least it's coming, and only 3 years after juice fizzing 🥂 bands and more instruments - another thing they've hinted at in polls and i kinda wished it to come with HSY yet was not surprised it didn't; that being said we need drums and other instruments like bass and/or contrabass, just more than what we have if we're to have bands plz skating and/or surfing - these two are very different and honestly idk how the latter one would work, i just think they are popular sports we could have; at least skate boards should be easy enough to implement and a cute way for sims to drift around their closed off worlds so i have more hope for that one 🏄

hotels - even if they've been around the franchise and ts4 seems to draw all it's ideas from previous iterations i'm not confident they haven't just been replaced by rental properties but it's not the same, i'd like to be able to meet other guests vacationing on the property without having to engineer everything about it, ordering meals at hotel services and running/owning a hotel also; retirement homes - ELDER SIM LOVE IN GENERAL (canes, health issues, idk im not that old yet ..hum wills & testiments, special interactions) i feel growing together really fucked up on that one but i was not surprised bc it's ts4 and we rely on crumbs mods here and thats why some players stop buying dlc 👵☕👴 the townie refreshes - just pay some fans to do it at this point bc it's taking so long; most of them don't need to be redesigned anyway, just add hot and cold weather outfits, preferences and maybe a sneaky extra trait or lifestyle they could have developed and voilá, finish that chapter disabilities - i don't want it in the form of traits and thing it's rotten to make people to pay for it BUT i'd love to see some disability representation in this game, physical, cognitive and what not. i understand at this point it might be hard to introduce but i think it be really important to have this in the sims and ts4 is about time funerals & cemeteries - death is a part of life, this is a life sim... thats it basically, i want it, i miss it in comparison to previous games, i fake it with parks and inviting guests over, but we shouldn't have to tho seems pretty basic stuff

more and better apartments - i would like it if we saw more conjoined builds, more apartment builds, both with few floors and plenty, the option to have sims living in different floors of the same building and even having business or community lots in builds that are divided into multiple lots - ambitious ik - bonus points if they update apartments in a way you can own one or more and rent them out - i don't want to play as a landlord, i swear - i just want my sims to be allowed do simbnb while they go for a weekend in the city (which ig u cant bc of the current system/coding idk) or bringing them to more existing worlds but bc of the obstacles to that i have 0 hopes well-crafted worldly words - i see a lot of americancentric choices being made when creating the worlds, it's unrealistic for a global player base and hum.. a life sim and whenever they drop interesting worlds they are always so frigging small you have to sacrifice making a lively town, with people and businesses, if you want you're sim to live in certain environments (or use multibuilds, which is fine ig but it bothers me a bit) and they fail to utilize the common spaces of the neighbourhoods in ways simmers would love to, to bring some life into these worlds; 🌍 the worldly part of it... i am yet to see african like climates and cultures represented, asia is so wide & full of diversity and we get one japan inspired world so far, south america if confined to a destination world if you don't have mods ig (maybe it's changed by now im not sure) and europe while being represented in 3 packs so far - and one of them being the best in terms of lots per world we've had so far - 2 of them have few lots and its all very niche, so in a way i don't need to be able to point to the actual cities that inspired those worlds, it's not my priority just something that crowded and lively that draws from wider range of cultures and that mre people could recognize as close to their experience would be nice 🌏 also more islands maybe im a sulani simp new jobs & careers - i love GTW, it was the first pack i got and sure it deserved a refresh by now and i would welcome it, especially if it meant more careers, i really liked that gameplay feature; that being said i feel like we deserve more job options OR branches. y no dentist ??? i cant think of ideas right now but while playing the game and setting up townies or sims i feel limited a lot trans content fixes - yea i avoid using the in-game system for trans rep (i headcanon a lot and cheat stuff basically) bc its just not the best in general (clothes fit weird, there's no changes in the frame through time as there would be with hormonal treatments - which there arent in the game so makes sense), not in comparison bc i dont know other games to compare it to just real life ig but im not even that informed tbh; i am happy they didnt create a life sim where trans people are erased and don't want them to be discouraged to stop investing in this at all so i try not to mention it but fix the binder at least & here's a tumblr post that helps me a bit something that surprises me - /pos !! because... they don't... a lot of what we see seems to me like repeating the content ideas from older games but spreading it out to make as much dlc as possible; i had a lot of more wow reveal moments with ts2 & ts3 i feel like but cant truly be sure bc brain is mush

[pwnyta]

Genshin character Judgement after all these years of playing. I will judge looks, personality, and say my favorite voice! Starting with 4-stars, alphabetical order.

(under the cut)

AMBER!

Still one of my favorite designs. The distribution of red/brown/white is really nice and well balanced. The rabbit theme is subtle but very cute. Her personality is adorable... I miss her. I MISS YOU AMBER.

Honestly all her voices are pretty similar and I dont really have a preference. Theyre all pretty good!

Barbara! ITS NOT HER FAULT... ITS NOT HER FAULT. Shes the first of a long line of blonde & blue characters.... Since she was the first(/one of the firsts) I wont be so harsh on her. She is very cute design wise. She makes me miss Milk Cookie... I do find her personality a little grating... or I just cant stand the 'GO BARBARA GO!' IDK. LOL Shes a good girl. I dont hate her. Despite my lukewarm take on her personality there is no other character that I feel MORE protective of IN GAME. I hate that she has stalkers and NO ONE IN GAME IS CONCERNED ABOUT IT. Venti excuses it, the nuns dismiss it, not even her sister seems to care... it drives me fucking NUTS.

Voice... Id say either CN or JP are the best but theyre all pretty cute. Some people say her old EN voice was better and those people are wrong.

BEIDOU- My beloved. Shes beautiful. Its hard to miss with black/red and the purplish shading of the reds is really nice too. I think she does sexy in a fun way. Her personality is the same. Shes a ton of fun and tough and adorable. I wish she was used more in the story.. shes a fricken pirate! How has she not been used for a summer event after all this time... Such a missed opportunity!

Her EN and JP voices clear.

God what a mess. Oh Bennett. That sweat-stained colored shirt grosses me out and he looks like a reject Kingdom Hearts character. I think some tweaks to her color palate would help him a lot. Personality is a bit rough too. Though I gotta say... its sorta similar to Barbara... where I feel protective of him although I find him kind of annoying. Please be nice to him. Hes one of the few characters that even I think hes like 12.

CN voice is best IMO. hes also sounds 12. LMAO PLEASE BE NICE TO HIM.

...Candace is so pretty. I remember seeing the leaks for her and being like SHES NOT A 5 STAR?! THE FUCK?! I wish she was. I wish she was more useful at least theres so many fuckin Hydro characters... The only complaint I have for her character is I wish she had darker skin. Ive seen a mod with her where she has darker skin and all her colors look so fucking good... Her personality is also TOP TIER. Her soft dommy-mommy thing was WILD to witness OMG her and Dehya... Shes so sweet... I love her so much. ;0; The only voice Im not THAT fond of is the JP voice. I think it stands out badly from the rest... CN is my favorite. The soft spoken tone is PERFECT.

I actually like Charlottes look... except for detached sleeves. It wouldnt be bad if this was a fucking design trope we see over & over on Genshin girls so its kinda unfair to judge Charlotte for it but IM GOING TO. TBF tho... Im not actually bothered by the pink/red which is my least favorite color combo. I think the red is purple-y enough to not make the colors clash as much. Her personality is fine. Im certainly not the biggest or smallest fan of her. Shes just fine.

Her EN voice is best for me. Her other voices sound SUPER young and I dont think fit her character. (they are cute tho)

Chevreuses design is crazy... shes one of the designs where its clearly sexy over practical and I just think its a bad look for her. IDKY (yes I do) HYV is so resistant to giving female characters PANTS but she'd look better with pants. Also the detached sleeves on this design is one of the MOST egregious. Her purple hair on this is also kinda wacky. PICK A STRUGGLE BITCH. her personality on the other hand... Phenomenal. I really liked the story we went through with her. Hers is the only blue life that matters.

I dont mind any of her voices either! Good job ladies!

Chongyun!!! Chongyun is my lil man and I love him so much. I know hes in his late teens/early 20s but hes my BABY and I love him very much. I really like his design even though Im not sure what is going on with his pants like where things connect... but the colors are nice (even if blue) and... YEAH. LOVE HIM. His personality is super cute. HE IS BABY.

I like his EN and CN voices best. His JP and KN voices sound a little too energetic for him.

Collei is great. I was really excited to see her in the leaks for Sumeru because Ive seen her in the comics. I mostly like the design they chose for her.... detached sleeves aside. I really like the woody color palate I like the references to Amber, I love the purple eyes against the greens of her hair and scarf thing....GOOD STUFF. her personality is fine too! No complaints here! Shes got big LIL GUY energy and I love her.

Her CN voice is by far my favorite. Her EN voice is super squeaky... I dont hate it but its probably my least favorite.

I used to hate Diona... I hate tsundere characters... HOWEVER when you max her friendship she says something that made me cry a little and that line was also incorporated into a limited event which was really good... anyways long story short shes MY daughter now. I love her design too. Shes very cute. I kinda wish her shirt was just white instead of the pink but I dont hate it.

I like all her voices. They all have a very similar tone! I think Dionas EN VA does the little girl voice a bit better than other EN little girl voices.

Unpopular opinion I guess but I like Doris design I get that her being an offensive greedy merchant stereotype might be annoying but I dont think shes the worst character I genuinely dont understand the intense vitriol against her. Criticism is well deserved but her design is SO mild. I love her glasses and color palate. Personality... MEH. We havent really seen much of her in story I feel like... she's a bit one note ATM. She definitely could use a hang-out to flesh her out some more. Shes fun when shes being played tho..

I like her EN voice the most I guess. But I have no strong feelings for any of them. I do like how quickly the CN VA talks tho... at least in the little clip I listened to.

Miku from WISH ass design. I sorta like elements to Faruzans design but it all feels kinda like a first draft. I completely accepted that I wasnt going to like her character in the slightest... but then in her hang out... she was really cute. Shes annoying in a funny way like Fish & Mona. LMAO

I like her EN voice the most! She sounds so dramatic and snooty it makes me laugh.

MY FISHY! I hated Fischl for so long... what a waste of time. It was the 2nd Summer event that made me change my mind on her. I WAS WRONG. OK. Sometimes even I make mistakes... shes IS annoying... but its in a funny way. Her design tho I hate. Why on earth Fish wasnt one of the Mondstadt characters to get a censor outfit baffles me to this day. JEAN got one but FISH didnt? OK... but at least she got a costume soon after (maybe thats why?) Anyways... Love her.

I dont have to even listen to the VAs... i know EN is my favorite. But I did listen to them anyways... I actually really LOVE KN Fishs voice... just not for Fish.

I can never like Frems design as much as I should because I saw his concept designs and they were MUCH better. That said... I guess its fine. I would prefer him be the ginger shark boy tho instead of A genderbent Barbara + Xingqiu. but god forbid HYV make an interesting design. His personality is very cute tho... he was saved by that Penguin event for me TBH LMAO... the way I fuckin SOBBED. Why did they do that... I DONT UNDERSTAND WHY THEY WENT THAT HARD.

All of Freminets voices are really good and very similar. if I had to pick my fav... KN and CN... I guess by a smidge.

Like Frem... GaMing had concept design leaks that were SO much more interesting than what we got. I was particularly interested in the bald one and I liked the bobcat outfit design... but I do prefer the colors they used in this design. His personality & hood hard carries him...

Im fine with all of Gas voices. En and KN are probably the best for him IMO.

Gorou is a lil buddy character. hes very appropriately good dog coded and I love him. He kinda reminds me of one character Tokyo Afterschool Summoners who was a anthro dog who was very proper but would act like a dog if prompted and then get embarrassed (like if you said 'paw' he would instinctually offer his hand)... Gorou kinda reminds me of that. A proper fella who doesnt realize how puppy he is. hes a good boy. His design is pretty good too. hes is probably the most... ero'd male character in the game its pretty funny. RIP buddy.

His JP voice is probably my favorite because it is so fucking funny. It sounds so deep and manly and proper... I think it fits his personality perfectly. All but KN are good tho... why'd KN go with such a baby voice for him I have no idea...

I LOVE all the colors of Heizous design just not together. I hate that Maroon with the mustard yellow... i really wish he had dark brown hair or even maybe a desaturated orange... IDK man... Also im just not connected to his character in the slightest... and he has a hangout. thats crazy.

All his voices are kinda weird for me... IDK what im supposed to get from any of them they all sound so different. EN sounds kinda shady (the way he speaks kinda reminds me of Kaeya when hes being a cheeky bitch), CN sounds a bit more sincere, JP sounds really young, KN is... just crazy... IDK what they were doing there.

...Oh Kaeya. My babygirl. I feel like anyone who liked Tony Stark would like Kaeya. hes got that saucy yet tragic air to him that makes him pretty misunderstood to people who dont know him well/dont care to know him. BUT I LOVE HIM. I cant wait to learn more about him... His design is one of my favorites too... and I didnt think Id like a costume on him but his costume is even prettier.

His EN voice is definitely my favorite. Honestly a lot of the KN voices sound so drastically different from the others it makes me wonder wtf they were thinking. Kaeyas KN voice is crazy.

Design-wise Im not that bothered by Kaveh but his personality irritates the fuck outta me. Hes definitely one of my least favorite characters in game. His only shining moment for me was when he was nice to Cyno and gave him the card he won. Im so glad his kit sucks so I dont ever have to use him.

All his voices are kinda the same vibe and I dont hate any of them.

Kiraras base design is SO ASS. Like Chev, her design is very sexy at the expense of design... but at least her personality is great and she recently got a phenomenal costume(even tho it looks very similar to Navias outfit... but if you could look more like Navia wouldnt you want to?). Anyways. Shes very cute.

Again I like all her voices except the KN... whyd KN make her sound so young... she sounds like a baby. She actually sounds a lot like Diona... except MORE baby. LMAO???

OOOH Layla. Babygirl. Im actually not bothered much by the detached sleeve look here since I guess she doesnt really have a top that the sleeves look like theyre supposed to be attached to... but its still like that same design trope... shes also blue THAT SAID. I really like her design overall. I just wish she had a different color. Im so sick of blue...

I actually really like ALL her voices... but this bitch talks so damn slowly... VAMONOS BITCH. I have shit to do!!!! You are very cute tho. If I had to pic a fav.... surprisingly? KN.

Lisa Lisa Lisa... ara ara ass bitch. Lisa is actually great. I love her. Her personality is way more grounded than I wouldve expected early on and I think they played it safe at the start of the game with characters... I think if she was introd later she might have been more like Yae. LOL but shes great. I like her design... although this blue-purple is probably my least favorite shade of purple in the world.

All her voices are great.... but CN is my favorite.

Attached sleeves? In this economy? Shout out to Lynette. Shes very cute. I really like how simple and practical her outfit looks compared to most female characters in this game. Its still kinda sexy but tasteful! I really like her simple boots. Kinda wish she wasnt blue tho... BUT I dont mind it as an accent on the main black. her personality is also great. ... her backstory is deranged... please be nice to her HYV wtf.

I like all her voices... but I dont think her EN voice is good for Lynette specifically. I prefer the more monotone soft-spoken sound of the others.

UGh... Mika.

UGH.

Only his JP voice is ok with me. UGH....

THANK GOD NINGGUANG. Hey beautiful girl.... I love everything about Ning. Shes so gorgeous. I love her personality. I love that she employs the kids in Liyue to keep an ear out for gossip and report back to her, I love her silly relationship with Beidou where they both sorta think the other thinks theyre shady and kinda acts defensively about it... goofy ass bitches. I LOVE HER (I LOVE THEM. Lantern Rite 2 cutscene you will always be famous.)

My favorite voice for her... KN!!! LETS GO KN. I also really like her EN voice when shes speaking normally but a lot of like attack lines and stuff sound kinda off.

Ah the babiest girl. Noelle... Why shes not a knight yet is DIABOLICAL work from the KoF. Theyre praying for her downfall. I know this. Mondstadt is corrupt and they cant have someone like Noelle in the ranks. I think her design is mostly good but the lack of petticoats makes her dress look so flimsy and weird.

I like her EN and Kn voices! Her JP and CN voices sound too young to me. EN also sounds kinda stiff but I do think its a character choice instead of a weird VA. Its suits her.

I think Razors design is a bit off but personality is great. Hes such a good boy... I hope we get to see more of him in the future but yeah i dont have much to say about him other than he is baby.

JP is my favorite voice for him. I actually cant stand his EN voice... I get what they were trying to do but it sounds TOO much like Tarzan but also goofy... and maybe im not bothered as much by the others since IDK the languages... this is similar to how I feel about child voices being done by adult women. Like I know what a child sounds like in English so when I hear that baby voice it just sounds like an adult doing a baby voice and thats so irritating to me.

I have some issues with Rosarias design (detached sleeves)but overall I like it. I like the uncensored version better. I also like her corpsy skin tone. I wish we got more on her character but considering her connection to Varka we'll probably have to wait till then to get more into her life then. Ah well.

Her KN voice is my favorite! but I dont mind any of them.

I was so excited for Sara when I saw the leaks. Her design is so good (detached sleeves aside) but getting to know her in story was so forgettable. It kinda reminds me of Dori where its like... ??? ok. Fingers crossed for a hangout event for her that fleshes her out a bit more.

I also dont like her EN voice much. All the others are great tho.

Sayu is a cutie pie and I love her. I think she looks a little goofy but since shes a baby its fine. her personality is very cute and Enjoyed her hangout event! her and Layla should have a sleepy-off. Who is the SLEEPIEST. We shall find out!

All her voices are good but CN is my favorite.

PART 1 done!

[angeltism]

OH YEAH YEAH DONT WORRY ABOUT THAT i have also been doing stuff for new years I UNDERSTAND!!!

YAHOO WE ARE MUTUALS FR FR!!! yeah im really comfortable with the way we are talking rn, theres still the fear that you May be disappointed with how much i have been faking my way of speaking just to not raise suspicion (i even changed the way i keysmash good lord) but idk! its really fun this way! the hopeless romantic that im displaying is still there im just showing it way more than i usually do SHAJHSJSHS you just gave me the perfect opportunity for that hehe YEAH YEAH im reaaaally enjoying getting to know each other better before actually. knowing who i am HEJSHSJSHS kinda makes me a bit less anxious about revealing myself honestly. gotta build up that familiarity before anything else yknow, specially considering how anxious i used to feel about the idea of directly talking to you, i just always end up seeing others as. unreachable? that if i say something in their askbox they wont like me? so having anon on while talking to you has helped. a lot. unfortunately makes things a bit more complicated but its still soooo fun hehe ALSO awesome joke you got there. happy new yuri brought to you by valentin and loveletter anon! (we are barely even girls)

- 💌 anon

aah I'm so happy uu feel comfortable,, I know a lot of beings ?? seem to think I'm scary . which . thank uu but also I promise I'm silly just like the rest of uu . heart hands . and aughh I get it sometimes when I go on anon w others I change my typing style a ton . like obv no "nawt" "purrfect" "purrobably" etc bc that's a dead giveaway that tis me !!!! the fool !!!! but also like . in general other stuff too .

n honestly as long as uu aren't outright changing uurself into an 100% different being like . I don't think I'll be disappointed or anything . in the end there's a sweet romantic being behind these asks even if uur typing style is different n that's what matters !! <3 <3

and yeahh I get that . . . I used to be suuuper socially anxious around my nyeow adored mewtuals n barely able to send an ask . . . tbf I still barely send asks I just . if I want to , I can without like . dying as much as I used to lol .

but um yeah I don't mind uu being on anon fufufu,, like it's fun and we're getting to know eachother and if uur more comfortable this way I don't mind staying this way for a while y'know .

and YESSSS ty somebun who recognizes my comedic genius ehehehe . happy new yuri from both of us teehee !! 🫶

[lostacelonnie]

Gotta keep that hope around for sure i will keep my fingers crossed for you. Oh that is a win win i gotta remember that, i say as if adhd wont make me forget. I usually just look for em to see like. What kinds are around. Whole ones. Broken ones. Weird shapes. Its interesting. Dont take any with me though. That. Makes me wonder how they teach english over there. Honestly yeah i look for a name in the bio or just. Shorthand the username somehow because i gotta have some way to refer to people. I havent used a bio in years so people use my username all the time. Oooh norway i have always wanted to go there. I dont camp as much as id like to but i should more tbh. I have seen her stacks & i gotta say. Clara is wild cant believe i let her sit unused. I dunno how much ill get but im gonna for sure be savin as i can. I think that one is last yeah. I am always interested at the start but fade by the end because the new stuff always slows down. Same ive been playing indies more like gris & obra dinn. To try & branch out. Good story annoying exploration is chasm in a nutshell yeah. True big cities be like that. I live in a smaller one now so very little happens. Mine hold dye decently well which i appreciate. Just wish we had true permanent dye. Maybe one day. Thats how i am with nail polish i always get it on the sides & mess up but ive gotta just. Be patient & let myself learn. Happy 1.2 star rail update

sorry for the late reply shfjglk i truly have no excuse other than "i was holed up in my room in an attempt to avoid interaction with my grandma but i accidentally also avoided interaction with Everyone Else" so im. So sorry ab that. COMING BACK hehe thankies!! if things go wrong i guess ill just move out for a while and then come back Suspiciously A Different Gender. nobodys gonna know. but yeah good luck on remembering that shdjfk!! and ahh thats fair i just usually visit pretty big beaches so theres not many around by the time i get there. english is taught just so you know the language but following the education system without external classes will get you a2 knowledge At Best and its getting worse with each year so. lol. and yeah frfr i use usernames as names alllll the time...... norway is very fun i recommend it!! esp if you prefer colder climates like i do. ahhh understandable!! i dont actually. own a tent but as i said, maybe one day. id rather go with friends tho which is a problem in on itself cos i dont have that many friends that actually know each other. unless i go with my photo camp friends. thats an Idea actually. YEAH CLARA IS GREAT.... i unfortunately dont have her quite built [terrible relic luck...... plus ive been more focused on trying to prepare for kafka recently] but seeing as shes my main [despite having jing yuan] i Will get her better stuff someday. i have 140 pulls rn so im equally nervous as i am excited. yeah it really Is like that bc im always paranoid ab spoilers so i always do at least the new story as fast as i can. except for right now as i still havent played the new honkai chapter [but tbf my game only managed to download the update yesterday, 3 days after the launch of 6.8] and i honestly dont have the energy to do it today so maybe tomorrow. ah that sounds fun!! i came back to minecraft recently idk why but ive been having a Great time. after 130 in-game days i am finally no longer homeless. and oh when i get older id like to move to a smaller city [since i like having things close but dont like having drama all the time] but im still thinking ab where. ah thats cool...... i tried looking for the dye that i used on camp but couldnt find it. rip. and yeah same tbh thats why i never paint my nails. and yeah happy star rail 1.2 o)-( i like the double planar ornament event since thats the only thing im missing for kafkas things......

[inthedusksynria]

until-lune respondeu seu post “@until-lune I’m 99% convinced that Micaiah will be...”A couple of things that I want to say. • If we...

@until-lune

Hello! Again i am using this one form of reply bc its easier for format! If you prefer i change for reply format it let me know!. Putting under read more bc this got long, but i had lots of fun doing it!. I am answering all your replies here!

M!Corrin-wise -  I dont think Omega Yato will be his weapon, because the refined version of his OG version (normal M!Corrin in the red pool) already has it. While his art has his normal weapon, his sprite has Omega Yato.

Dawn Yato is definitely a possibility tho! although it would be very odd to give it to him and not make its Twin/Mirror Weapon Dusk Yato to CQ!themed!L!F!Corrin.(but hey its IS)

(something i am so salty off bc i love Dawn and Dusk Yatos ;-; they are so pretty and match so well their promotions... and games... heck!! they both have their route-represent Legendary weapons features incorpored on them and just *clenches fist at the emotional moments*)

Also, A re-colored dragon alt is also a possibility, since L!F!Corn did that.

I dont think skipping the Staff is a certainty because IS has made weird choices before. Leif has an Bow which is a weird choice for him, but, like Corrin, he has a A Rank in bows in his promoted class, and like Corrin he is an “unpopular” Lord. Chrom and Lucina have Bows, when they also had Lances as options by promotion class.

I dont think popularity certainly incentivizes diversity in weapon usage. because we have had a lot of Weird choices from IS of making a popular character have the same weapon across multiple alts. -> 3H lords, Ike, Eirika and Ephraim had all a repeat of their OG weapons and are far more or just as popular as Micaiah; and even weirder L!F!Corrin, who by CYL and Nintendo magazine poll is more popular then M!Corrin,  has the same weapon type than her fallen version (and still lacks a red alt for her emblem AND had an iconic red weapon associated with her promotion of DarkBlood/Nohr Noble (Dusk Yato)). Also fun fact, F!Corrin counterpart to M!Corrin Staff Rank is a Tome Rank. So it would also be possible for her to have had an red tome alt.

conclusion regarding weapons: IS pretty much spins a Wheel and decides what to do. I think its pretty much a case of...whatever the executives woke up on that day wanting.

(that, of course, doesnt make theorizing what weapon they will have  any less fun xD)

Honestly the only reason why I am certain it is Micaiah is irrational/a F2P technique. In  that if it is not her, it will destroy my will to summon and thus allow me to spend less XD. I have seen people doing it and boy does it works wonders when you arent right.

Going by that (my theory it is Micaiah) I find it unlikely to be Colorless (and thus Staff or colorless tome) only because the other spreads are just That Good^tm.

One of the methods that people used to guess which color the new Leg/Mythic will be is to see which color has a busted spread of colors. And it has been right ever since Edelgard

(The reason for so is that IS seems to have realized that by debutting the hero on a so-so spread, it made people wait for their rerun in order to get them, Bramimond being an example in that his spread was awful (L!Grima) and his rerun spread was godsmacking good (Mila)... pun not intended)

The colorless this time is rather...i wouldnt say weak, because Eir usability is REALLy good and Duma has a nice niche of wrecking people plans(cackles in my AR matches). However, they are fairly outdated in comparation with the other color spreads. So, in the event this leg hero is Micaiah (or Elincia, or Byleth) i dont think they would be colorless because of that.

Oh! Regarding the CYL theory, since the legendaries were introduced in the second year of FEH, I dont consider much broken, since i merely think its always /A/ winner instead of the 1st of each year. Since shuffling of legendaries is possible, (those times when IS changed the calendar lineup), should the Byleths win CYL(which is fairly likely). it would be easy to put them on the next GW. And I also think it will be a theory that will be broken absolutely next year, since I doubt Marianne and Gatekeeper would be viable L!Heroes. I agree with you that is a weak pattern that is likely to be broken.

Counterpoint to Wind F!Byleth ->  Blessings not always end up being the element that is most associated with the Character in the main game. Highly Water themed (and midly Fire themed;) Corrin ended up as Wind; Julia, who has Minor blood of fire and was called “Genealogy’s Fire Emblem sword” was Earth; Eliwood, wielding the fire themed Durandal, was Wind. (tbf this is also a counterpoint to Wind Micaiah, since she has more association with Light and maybe Fire(?) than Wind)

Regarding 3H launching with 3H, besides Edelgard, Claude also debuted with no 3H legendary accompanying him. Annete was there, but other than that, no other 3H unit or legendary was on the banner. In fact, the pattern i do see with 3H legendaries is that their first re-run matches with a release of a Mythic in their color spread. (Edelgard -> Hel ; Dimitri -> Seiros).

I want to highlight that i am not saying it wont happen, but that I lean more towards they keeping a space between 3H legendaries release, in order to long term profits, and to not cause burn-out of 3H content. (or at least decrease people complaining about it; They seem to have learned their lesson with the Fates and Tellius spams.)

Finally,I do think that it is possible for Micaiah to be a Staff and for other characters to be released in this month/banner, mostly it is the premises i chose to apply to this theorizing lead me in a contrary direction xD. You show some good points! (I would love a Dawn Yato Corn and a Staff Micaiah ;-;...)

Extra Tangent: I have absolutely no idea what IS(executives) considers the character is associated with Silver Snow like...

For one side, Seteth makes lip service saying the route lord is Rhea; Rhea presents the choice mirror to Edelgard’s in the route split; the ending cutscene focuses on Rhea character development/closure, but, at the same time, she is Sir Not Appearing for 75% of the route and the rest of the time she is benched.

For another side, Byleth was made to be the lord to Edelgard emperor’s and her rival; has several cutscenes showcasing that; is the “lord” of the route in role sense, but, on the other hand, its more associated with Fire (fire emblem).

Honestly at this point i just dont know what FEH is going to do with them. I think IS is going to make one of Byleth Wind as you said and the other Fire, but which one, i have no idea. I could see too an argument for Ground(since i think at the lack of an Light element for Light element character-focused they pick ground sometimes) too, but yeah. 

I cant believe the true plot twist of GW is gonna be Rhea being the wind legendary breaking all of our theories xD (/j, but can you imagine how funny it would be?)

[christinedaaeunofficial]

i hate looking for toothpastes online that Wont feel like theyll set my autistic/adhd mouth ablaze with the levels of mint jampacked in there and being met with nothing but toothpaste For Kids :) Bright FUN Kids Toothpaste For Little Children With Dinosaurs And Unicorns AND GLITTER

like tbf having a t rex on my glittery blue raspberry flavored toothpaste Would Absolutely Fuck To The Nth Degree but i think im just sour on the fact that theres so much work yet to do wrt accommodations for adhd/autistic folk and we get so infantilized at every turn that i cant help but look at the pink happy packaging of this toothpaste w happy smiling kids on the front w such a level of disdain bc even though its just toothpaste at the end of the day, i dont have many other options to both end the literal burning sensation in my mouth when i use this "anti-sensitivity" mint toothpaste and not feel like a Dumb Idiot Baby for not being able to handle the pain my brain is finding in mint toothpaste where most others are not

idk man im just tired im going to bed

[wenightmareyou]

movie post for AR @alien-romantic !! ✨

okay i feel like my movie taste really does come down to what did i see in theaters that made me define my personality around them for the rest of the week, and i usually have Allergic to Watching Old Movies Disease so most of these are p recent! my movie taste is Also defined by what i saw enough on tumblr that eventually i broke down and watched it and it was actually amazing lol

✨favorite horror movies✨

Jennifer’s Body: THEE movie of all time, it literally has anything i could ever want in a movie: excessively campy dialogue, a plot around making a deal with the devil, a town that’s slightly fucked up, extended metaphors about gender violence but in a palatable PG-13 non-graphic format, Megan Fox going feral and eating boys, a homoerotic friendship where they also kinda hate each other but its mostly bc neither of them can deal with their feelings in the world they were brought up in, and a soundtrack that slaps. Seriously i could probably quote this movie word for word at this point, and like technically its horror but its also really funny and theres not really any jumpscares or anything. Im gonna stop talking about this one bc if i keep going i could write a whole essay but its so good (also i wont elaborate but Jennifers Body and Heathers are sisters, spiritually)

Us: hhhhhhhh this is so good, ik Jordan Peele’s only directed two movies so far but he never misses, like this was genuinely terrifying for me but also raises a lot of Questions and made me think about the implications of it for weeks afterward. It’s about this family vacationing in Santa Cruz, CA at the same time that there’s this planned uprising of doppelgängers all around the US (i cant remember if its the world or just the US? But it makes a lot of commentary about the US in particular so im guessing its just the US). I’ve still only seen it once but the aesthetics are so good, its definitely more on the violent side than Get Out was, but its not too bad (like idk if you’ve seen Midsommar but like. its nowhere near as gory as that lol). I swear i didnt have a fear of doppelgängers before this but between this and tma i sure do now

It (chapter 1): this one is so close to my heart omg 🥺 i associate it super strongly with watching it with friends so thats at least half the reason its a favorite. Also i love horror-comedies so much as a genre, mostly bc i scare easily so its nice to have jokes in between to break the tension and this movie’s hilarious

Cabin in the Woods: i cant say what this one’s about without spoiling it but i’ll say it definitely goes under the same category as It for me, in terms of horror-comedy. Its such a fun deconstruction of horror movie tropes and it gets so insane at the end, like when you watch it you can *tell* it was made in 2011 but like in a good way

Also honorable mention to The Love Witch for sending me into a spiral about what truly is the female gaze/if there can be one definition of that/the relationship between love and violence etc etc basically it’s Extremely Gender. Also not v bloody and doesnt have any jumpscares, and its an aesthetic masterpiece omg

✨favorite comfort movies/romcoms✨

Juno: i dont normally have favorite actors but Elliot Page is my emotional support favorite actor, like idk how to explain it but all of his characters just scream comfort character somehow. Juno has the same screenwriter as Jennifer’s Body so it has a really similar sense of humor, but altogether v wholesome plot about a pregnant teenager and her bff, michael cera. Also highly quotable, and i dont think ive ever watched this without crying, like this is one of those movies where im like love is real actually 🥺💕

Easy A: this movieee!!! Oh my god this movie, its so intensely californian and thats def part of why i like it. Also realizing now a major factor in movies i like is how quotable they are bc this is another one i feel like i quote all the time. Plus theres something so fun about baby Emma Stone living her 80s movie protagonist dream AND doing the “you think i’m a villain? I’ll show you a villain!” trope bc thats always fun

All of twilight but especially the first one: i mean idk what to say, i got brainworms when i was 11 and made twilight my whole personality for like 3 years, then grew out of it, then the twilight renaissance happened and im Back on My Bullshit 😂 i also just like having a purpose for me memorizing everything possible about twilight in middle school so like.... if you ever want any fun twilight facts hit me up (this goes to AR but if you’re not AR and reading this too this also applies lmao im down to talk about twilight any time)

And honorable mention to Scott Pilgrim (okay not a romcom but def a comfort movie), to be fair i havent seen this one all the way through in a looong time but i go back to the most iconic parts a lot

also okay theres def more in this category that i like but my brain is turned off now so i cant remember them 😂

✨ and the best category: movies i hate ❤️ ✨

i feel like i tend not to like movies that feel like they’re trying too hard? Like if i watch something and *instantly* know its trying to be Oscar bait, or if its trying to be camp but like,,., pretentious high end camp. Like anything by Wes Anderson is a hard nope for me, also i saw Gravity in theatres on a whim whenever that came out and it just didnt click for me at all. (Also okay The Love Witch kiiiind of checks the boxes for this but its still a fave)

Also okay this movie isnt any of those things but i still dont like it: It Chapter 2! I feel so bad cause It chapter 1 was so good and created this huge hype for the sequel for me, but the plot just went off the fucking rails. Sure we got bill hader being in love with his childhood best friend which spawned the whole Reddie craze on here for awhile..... but that came at the price of naked old ladies being used for shock value and whatever the hell was going on with Pennywise being an alien/god/something??? Like if the book is like this i know i couldn’t get through it, i was laughing my way through the whole movie but like, laughing (derogatory)

I feel like this section just became a reason to dunk on It Ch 2 but honestly the only other sequel i can think of that betrayed me like that was Endgame 😂

Also unrelated but while im still on the topic of movies i dont like/my hot takes: 10 Things I Hate About You was too sexist for me enjoy, i see it hyped on here a lot and im like ??? yall that did not age well 😭 but tbf i still like Mean Girls so we all have our things 😂

[floralkittygambler]

Reposting for reasons

Response to Honest’s post here: Doing this to spread this awareness more as I know theres a bit of a rift in the critical community - plus I really fucking go on. Im PISSED and I do apologise however it NEEDS urgent addressing. I know people will hate me for it but Im used to hate and honestly? Hating rather than helping to solve the issue only furthers my fucking point here. So yeah this is so more people are aware (no offense to any of those involved in said rift either, but this is an important message. Thank you for understanding and if I can do anything to make all sides comfortable, then please message me and I’ll do my upmost.) “ More awareness of this is needed. Even if it’s your favourite, you can’t justify their shit but rally against another’s shit. Have people tell you you’re experiences arent real or invalid because, like Husk, people have - in real life - shipped you with someone you are far from comfortable with but you still treat them like a person. Because you have basic respect. And people force you to accept harassment, touching, stalking, advances for THEIR satisfaction. People use you for their fantasies. But you’re just a ‘tsundere’ for it. Or you have addiction issues but people think being with another addict will ‘save’ you because you’re apparently too incompetent to save yourself. Love isnt some magic fuckin cure so stop romanticising it as a fuckin saviour. It’s gross and fuckin creepy. Get stalked and have someone NEVER accept your no just because you show youre still decent enough to not treat them shitty or any different from anyone else. Try having someone way older or way younger (both in morally fucked up ways) advance on you and people encourage that. People you’re supposed to feel safe around.

People touch you when you pull away or show discomfort. Follow you home. Have pictures of you and wont accept you dont like them like that and it’s not ‘playing hard to get’ or ‘the thrill of the chase’. Fuck. OFF. In fact, Im not only disappointed in the fandom. Im disappointed in the entire team who some should know better from their OWN personal experiences - or at least the bare minimal of being a fucking adult. Im disappointed in especially females (sorry idk whether girl or woman is more appropriate here-) who statistically are more likely to have experienced something similar at some point in their lives think this is a cute gay moment. No. Angel is made out as a fucking predator - Im not saying he is, Im saying that his persistence is very fucking unwelcome like one. People like Husk dont need that fucking invasiveness. They/We need patience and someone on our level. Angel’s I know are the fuckin polar opposite - and some of them I know are very sexually harassing, including unwanted touching. It’s a shitty way to present gay people. Gays are fuckin people. Some are cunts and some arent. It’s a HUMAN thing. But considering the shit theyve been subjected to, presenting a gay as a victim only to also show them as a perpetrator is insulting! And for those Ive seen argue this about how people like AD wouldnt know how to express their love normally and whatnot? His pig. His best friend. He’s in his fucking 30s. There are literal real life criminals who get molested as kids and then go on to molest kids. Not all who grow up like that turn into nonces. Stop just fucking STOP justifying and romanticising this bullshit! I used to see the good in AD but now he makes me fucking sick. Especially with my verrrrrry fucking real traumas and connections. But fuck me, eh? Because this fictional guy matters so much more. Fuck real victims. And whilst we’re at it, fuck AD too when it suits your fetishes! Sarcasm aside, the fans and the team need to straighten up their abhorrent behaviour. Stolas. Fucking clearly having an affair, knowingly fucking up his daughter’s mental health and bribing a guy into sex who only wants the book and nothing more. He even has a fucking warning button over Stolas- Guys, how do you think any of this is cute? Even the team gross me out- I genuinely see potential and talent and it’s all gone to shit to satisfy horny teens, horny adults, and literally everyone who doesnt for the life of them understand being an adult is more than sex, drugs, violence and swears! I REALLY want to keep enjoying HB/HH but it’s getting harder and harder with such ignorant and bordering lazy creators (note: lazy as in wont do the fucking research or actually listen to real criticism and victims), such despicable fans (yeah, some HDers fuckin mocked that they triggered my ED, yet they had the fucking NERVE to support Angel’s potential ED AND laugh and blame me for me getting treated so badly for actually having the balls to call Angel and the teams hypocrisy. I got told to kill myself, that my problems arent real - oh but Angels apparently is! Which... They *are* but AD isnt real so technically only onlookers will suffer and not a drawing  - and they just excused their toxic behaviours. These people are like “aww poor angie babey!” yet fuckin INSULT sex workers. All this red in Hazbin yet it feels everyone and they mama colour blind. The issues are getting worse and fans are outright becoming EVIL, VILE, Vindictive little bullies - from kids to adults. You SHOULD be ashamed of yourself if you conduct yourself in such a manner. And you need to readjust your attitudes and behaviours because the only fuckers getting hurt are actual fucking victims. Ever been violated and been gaslit so much you STILL fucking question it’s reality? So you drown that shit out yet somehow it’s effects still hit you? Fetishise it. Make it your uwu gae couple goals, you’re no better than people believing Harley and the Joker werent toxic af. If this shit happened to you, most of you would actually SEE where we’re all coming from. Also, stop making gay a fetish - you’re like those creepy old men in the alley heckling lesbians to make out so they can wank off. Gays, no ALL the LGBT+ are fucking people too. So dont give me that bullshit then start turning everything just gay or just straight to mentally wank off to. It’s degrading and dehumanising. And yes, fiction does effect reality. You crush on a fictional character? Mourn one? Support one? Hell, fuckin jerk off to one - that’s affecting reality. Remember how in fiction all blacks were treated as villians? Look how theyre treated IRL. JAWS, great classic unfortunately their was a spike in shark killings over a fucking movie - the shark in the movie wasnt even real for the most part because they dont behave like that! (Also the animatronic was so shit they genuinely had so many issues - I think they even took to naming each one! Some fun trivia there!). Tiger sharks are more nasty than great whites as tiger sharks will hunt and eat a human. Great whites prefer seals and dislike human flesh, they just mistake us for seals. Hell, theres the toothless basking shark - theyre often SWAM WITH by divers for being so friendly. Yet Jaws made people think all sharks are bloodlusting over humans. Slenderman was created for a fucking contest and that influenced a stabbing (NOT Victor’s fault). Watch a horror movie that isnt based on a real life event and tell me that at least ONE has left you peaking over your shoulder. Stella may be a bitch - we dont know for certain - but try getting cheated on. Y’know what? Try growing up in such a broken home like Octavia. Yeah reaaaaaal fucking cute now, huh? Funny how as well y’all petition for male victims to be taken seriously then laugh when fictional males experience this abuse, further adding to stigma. You can be hit on by the hottest mf on the planet but if you arent interested, that should be respected! Also we’ve all been inspired by at least one fictional character so yeah. Yknow, since I was little Ive been fighting for sex worker and homeless rights. But HH/HB treatment of both leave a bitter taste in my mouth. I’ll still fully support sex workers and the homeless, but that’s the fucking effect this show is having. Bearing in mind I wont ever share everything Ive been through - and I shouldnt fucking have to in order to be believed and validated (obvs proof is required in a legal case but that’s a whole other topic). Why should I share MY fucking pain especially when you fuckers have belittled and triggered it more so? We have our rights to our secrets but fuck ME you lot NEED to start acting appropriately and like decent fucking humans. ‘iTs HeLl’ yeah and welcome to Earth- the team and yourselves live HERE. You obide by THESE rules. And as someone with beliefs (and a LOT of ancient fucking texts and studies on this shit) their Hell isnt even a proper Hell! It’s closer to purgatory and even then it’s not. Regardless, it’s a poorly built world with the lore consistently changing per episode and tweet, with many plot holes, and is apparently easy to get into - even via accidentally watching porn according to a stream. If youre gonna parade youre a fucking expert and research into demonology and use real believed figures, at least get THAT right. In fact, Lucifer and Lilith (and Stolas tbf) are ESPECIALLY risky as theyre a lot more complex than most easy access texts will tell you. Likewise, Stolas’s first introduction and main focus is sex. He’s one of the FEW Goetia demons that dont have some involvement in relationship issues at ALL. He’s known for astrology, crystals and herbs but hes also known to aid MONEY troubles (it’s lesser known but it’s true! HB Stolas is an insult to the Prince). Turning Vodou into something evil is vile considering it’s powerful and liberated slaves. Pentagrams are nothing to do with Satan, they’re magic based sigils. Upside down cross is the symbol of a SAINT. It’s just some edgy attempt to trick people into believing they know more than they do. Also you should NEVER dabble and doodle sigils without knowing the meanings or respecting what they behold. Vox and Val, real fuckin cute way to make them look like a stupid fucking highschool drama instead of a fucking SEX TRAFFICKER (note: real pimps often target YOUNG folks too - aka minors - and groom them into sex work. Theres different types of pimp. Viv has shown barely any understanding of ‘the game’ and its a fucking insult to injury. Yes we KNOW what a fucking pimp and prozzie are! We dont need to see it. We need REAL AWARENESS.) and a fucking scheming bastard of a CEO salesman botman. And yet even THEN lets go a step further and make some yandere wuv on boyfweind aboose! Fuck off- Now I love a good anime but these tropes are getting fucking dangerous now. And unrealistic to real love and relationships. Kids nowadays know fuck all on a healthy relationship (neither did the fuckin 50s tbf) and Im seeing more romaticism and glorifying abusive situations. Like the show ‘You’. Ok, there’s a fuckin bloke online who slaughtered innocents and kidnapped yet people commented how cute he is on his IG and that they want to be kidnapped or killed by him next. Dont believe me? Look up Peter Manfredonia Connecticut and the comments people left him and then tell me why shit like whats being presented in HH/HB ISNT fucking concerning - because it is. For a series about redemption, it’s brilliant at the opposite (Quote from the creator herself, Viv has posted that it’s influencing her bad choices. Even as a joke, proof’s in the pudding). And the overall focus on sex in the way Viv does is so immature and really creepy, and this is from an ADULTS perspective. From one adult to another, Im concerned as to why any of them think this is a normal fixation. Then again they’ve hired quite a large amount of dodgy folks and even a child. Most of this shit gets avoided with a basic background check like most companies run. I DO like Hazbin. Or the premise. I love some of the cast and spite the others. In Helluva, I just like a tiny portion of the cast. And I critique it so harshly because Viv DOES need a wakeup slap, grounding to reality, people who arent going to big her up or kiss her arse for once and shape her up to be the best she can be. The actually reach and even surpass her potential. And to reach where you need to be, there’s a lot of harsh lessons youll face. That’s life. Shes chosen one of the most HEARTLESS industries and if she blocks out critique as ‘hate’ then she’s not strong enough and wont last. It’s just another unprepped YanDev again (except I dont believe Viv to be a nonce. Even with her dodgy past and dodgy present, I think her perspective on sex and relationship with sexuality is FAR from healthy BUT I dont believe she’s a pedophile. Ive bled my fair share and so far, I just think her sex perspective isnt healthy or mature for her age. But there’s little to nothing to suggest actual noncery - dont worry about accusations there. But YanDev is totally a dirty predator. Just clearing that up). Viv NEEDS some harshness and stability if she wants to do things right. And it’ll make her fucking cry but if she loves these projects as much as she claims to, then you’ll sacrifice blood, sweat and tears for that shit. Even the strongest points are mediocre at best when properly observed. She CAN do more, but she’ll have to face the harsh music. Viv wont see this, but if she does, I dont care if it upsets her. Why? Because this is that much of an issue - something she’s cultivated - that she needs to take action and not ignore it or be secretive about it. She needs to grow up and get tougher skin. Im not saying this to cause her pain. In fact, I wouldnt waste my fucking limited time if I DIDNT care. Trust me, I have duties to be met at a certain quota every single day. I say this shit only because I give a shit and care. If we met, she’d fucking hate me. But people like me are good for shaping people up to their potential. And we arent always this ‘tough love’ either. But when someone needs that level of harshness to help themselves, we’re not afraid to lose people or cause upset if the results end up being the best for them. If she ever saw this, she needs to re fucking evaluate her message, her story, and those she’s choosing to welcome into her circle. And all Im seeing is one rookie mistake after the other. Her paid patreon discord. Just like the messages Honest has posted on her side of being harassed (not in Vivs fyi), Ive experienced shit and bullying and even stay silent on their for being attacked for a group I fuckin paid to be in and yet I feel isolated. It’s all arsekissing and ‘thank you viv’ (thats an actual channel-) and it feels like a place of borderline worship and people trying to appease her 24/7 whilst kicking others with different opinions down. There’s so many I love but I aint kissin yer fuckin arse. Ask the closest friend I have - we’re fucking raw and wont just side with each other just because. We’ll call each other out if we think they’ve fucked up and then help each other build themselves up better. Because real fuckin people who actually care wont just want to be adored by you. They’ll care enough to point out your bullshit and help you, even if they upset you at the time. They’re real and upfront with you. People like us arent always the easiest to be close to either because we arent afraid of upsetting someone if it’s in their best interest and to help them. Likewise, we dont go out looking for fights either. Most times, we’re fuckin soft bastards- All this shit listed is the fuckin surface level of the real life hell of this fandom. And unsurprisingly, those who experience little to no toxicity have always been higher on that popularity ‘food chain’ - enough admirers and shared opinions that people wanna arse kiss regardless of their OWN feelings as well as neutral perspectives. I’d say you’re the lucky fans, but you’re not. You’re sheltered, and that isnt always the best way to be sadly. As for the fans. If Ive upset you. Well... I dont care. Because many of you have actively sought me out and weaponised my traumas against me. You never cared about my feelings then. Why should I care about yours? Im not doing this out of malice. Im fed up of humans behaving so pathetically yet claiming to be high and mighty. Most of you have been arseholes to those in and out of the community. The victims and non-victims alike. Hardly any of you considered once my real suffering. You put a drawing over a life. Many lives. You had the audacity to tell me Im full of shit. Some even using my real traumas to make a mockery of me and those Im around with a very similar history. Some with traumatic histories that differ from my own. You hardly ever considered the real lives of those effected. So no, Im not sorry for having the fucking balls to this day to still stand up for our rights and give us a voice that’s long been stolen. Im not sorry for being a fucking victim. Im not sorry for saying what desperately NEEDS voicing. And Im not sorry for not conforming to you or any fandom just to belong. We deserve better than to constantly be your fuckin arse monkeys (well... the trope is butt monkey but yknow-) and to be mistreated, misrepresented and harmed by you. You’re no different to the school bullies who give speeches on anti-bullying day. And I hope every single one of you starts looking into yourselves and improving. PS: Depending on the texts you read, Lucifer is said to have been redeemed or to be redeemed. Fun fact to haunt yalls with~ “

[agirlofwinterfell]

🔥 topic being gendry and or jon

Unpopular opinion meme, needs a topic or i wont answer 

Gendry: 

- Is a good boy??? I love??

- He could’ve abandoned Arry and Weasel, but he came back, my heart 

- Wants Arya close, but only wants m’lady to go away. Change my mind. 

- wtf is Gensa, do not, Gendry wouldn’t i’m sorry. I’m like 99% sure Arya is the only person Gendry likes in canon, let alone highborn he likes, because she’s not classist. Stop giving everything to Sans.

- Boyo was soft for Arya, change my mind 

- I LOVE GENDRY

- He’s 14, and he’s such a good boy- wow is he 16 now? idk, Arya THINKS he’s 5 years older than her, but we don’t actually know? He looks strong and older for his age, he could’ve been as young as 12 at the series start, I don’t remember any specific information on his age other than Arya saying he was five years older. Anyway, he’s 14, and he’s such a good boy. Saves Arya when he thinks she’s a boy, protects her and helps with Weasel, continues protecting her, and then lets Willow boss him around, like he doesn’t care, boss him around, he knows he’s stubborn. He’ll protect the little ones, my HEART ONLY GENDRY WAS DIFFERENT, WHAT A GOOD BOYO

- He’s very important to Arya’s storyline, but also his own. I think Gendry deserves his own POV chapter. I want his thoughts.

- I don’t think I have “unpopular” opinions about Gendry? I love him sm? He’s vital- oh

- I don’t think he’ll get Storms End or legitimised in the Books, because Robert never acknowledged him. It should go to Edric or Mya. I said what I said. 

- Fun fact, derived from the french word, Gendry means son in law. Specifically, it’s a son in law that inherits his father in laws lands. All i’m saying is... Winterfell

Jon:

- Jon isn’t attracted to people on physical features. In fact, in the books, Ygritte is a bit more odd looking. Rose? Beautiful. Perfect. In the books though, she looks like wildling, and she’s a mess, and I love her?  He doesn’t have a thing for Red hair, just because he got with Ygritte. In fact he often compares her to body wise be like Arya, and no comparision of her hair to another’s from what I remember. I don’t that headcanon that Jon’s into red heads specifically, he was into Ygritte, usually it’s used to prop up J*nsa. (Although tbf, i saw the first ep of GoT before reading the books, and I thought him and Cat were fucking bc of one camera pan, so like. Michelle and Kit have chemistry, I’ll say it. DO NOT TAKE THAT ANY OTHER WAY)

- Also we know from the scripts, that in Season 7, Arya was right. We know how Sansa feels anyway, and Jon clearly. Even then, in the books or show, not happening. 

- Speaking of, why would Jon become romantically interested in his sister’s childhood bully? The girl that bullied him too? I don’t like that trope. Jon wouldn’t put personal pleasure above Arya’s discomfort and hurt that Jon now prefers the perfect one, when all childhood he preferred Arya. He wouldn’t go there, even if he did feel something for Sans. He loves Arya too much to hurt her like that. She’d go from most important person in his life, to second to Sans yet again. With other women, this isn’t a problem, but with Sans it is for that reason. Childhood traumatic bully, that still has left scars on Arya’s psyche two years after not seeing her. Theon remembers it! After years as Reek, he remembers, it’s not an insignificant thing, so why would Jon?? 

- Jon Snow is more than his ships, and I think he’s a good boy too. 

- I dont like the R+L=J plot all that much, it feels so Luke Skywalker-y and the fandom grossly misinterpreted it, as well as Lyanna and Rhaegar and it’s...Lyanna is 14-16 years old, and Rhaegar is 30+ and married with kids. Elia Martell deserved better, and Jon would agree with me on that, change my mind. In saying that, sure go ahead George, i wanna see how you do it. Probably better than D&D, because Aegon and Rhaenys didn’t deserve to be disinherited bc the Seven is based on Catholicism, and divorce in catholicism... well look at Henry VIII

- Jon killed Ygritte with his arrow. You can’t change my mind. 

- Catelyn emotionally abused Jon growing up, and I hate it. Why don’t we talk about this more? 

- Jon Snow doesn’t actually want to be king. That’s my opinion, and I said what I said. Bran should be King in the North, and Winterfell is his 

Both: 

- They wouldn’t bond over being Ned and Robert’s sons. Bc they both hate Robert, at least I think Jon does? 

- They’d bond over being the favourite people of Arya Stark 

- Arya Stark 

- They would be good friends though, I can see them getting along? 

[fmdjoosungarchive]

【✧】━━━ ♥ d e s i g n e d     b y     a e s t h e t i c ♥ ━━━【✧】

bear headphones hellooooooo. sung is a bearpuppy n would have considered pitching to have a puppy version too but would think there’s no way that would get thru bc it would require much more money than its worth. but THINK ABT IT. he’s a radio dj, he’s well known as a super idol fan, And he’s a bear. it’s perf. of these i think the middle left is closest to how im thinking of it but i’ll leave more detail for the hc below lol

word count: 438

so imagine those cat ear headphones, but it’s bear themed, and fuzzy

sung would want them to be comfy and wearable for longterm, so the sizing and squishies would be part of his product pitch

and the ear muffs would have cute bear faces most like the middle pic

he’d ideally like a couple of colors, the expected brown, a pink, and then white blue or black (all if dms wants to but he’d expect three to be the most, n Realistically expect if they went w this idea it would be just one bc,, less money. but he wants 3 or 5!)

he wouldn’t b expecting the kind of quality he has in his studio headphones bc that can get Really expensive, but i have raycons n i feel like thats the level of quality he Could get within the price range 4 sure

wouldn’t b the best but for casual listening it’s dope. if they didn’t end up being real shit quality sung would wear a pair of these to airports.  imagine his fans being like we match~ im not a fan of those selfie day things but this wOULD be great for that,, tbf,,,,,,,,

 anyway for the product pitch

idk if ive said it on dash or if it’s just in my dms but sung is a powerpoint FIEND when it comes to dms meetings

that vibe of ppl that are like ‘least im using my art degree for something’ but that’s sung w growing up primed to b a business heir

no it doesnt suit him at all but Yes he learned a lot and that means he’s gonna be professional n business-y as shit to have a better shot at them doing what he wants

any time he’s tried to convince dms to stop doing smth for him too, powerpoint time lol

i’m gonna post a lil fake ppt about this below so i dont wanna overexplain too much but for what wont show up in ss,, sung’s style w these powerpoints is to come off professional for the most part

it’s a tactic to convince, so it won’t be him letting his full personality out

BUT he wants it to be semi fun for him lol he’ll b more loose w things that arent so strict like this as product pitches (ie album concept pitches) but for this, his fun would come in the little ways

like transitions may be stars swiping across the page or he’ll attempt at some form of jokes here and there when explaining (tho honestly he should keep the jokes out they’re only harming his pitch smh)

PPT 

(or parts of it because it’s difficult and awkward to make and takes a Lot of space for each slide)

btwn here he’d have a section talking about headphones generally, introducing the topic that he’ll be on, then go on to talk about the popularity boom that wireless headphones had (i am Not doing research like he would i just know the beats -> every other headphone brand was a Big thing that’s since become less of a big thing,,)

he’s very source driven, does a lot of research for his charts

talking abt the popularity of cat headphones from twitch streamers

a more vague conclusion page in here would talk about the interest filling that gap, and would segue into sung’s design idea

idt he’d think bear headphones exist so he’d present it as earmuffs + headphones. he’d go on to talk about why bears and headphones represent his image/brand, some slides he would have hated making about his sellability as it comes to brands he has promoted for, as well as things he owns that are bear themed that had spikes in selling after he used them. ofc this applies to any idol, but he’d feel it was important in a business context to point out why this is the Right choice. he’d tie back to sun’s goodnight, and his image growing into that of a music producer as well, saying that it applies to a deeper meaning for the fans who care about his side projects, and lighter ones who just like him being a bear in their eyes, as well as generally is a cute design that could apply to non fans. he would also go into detail of research on sound quality, design re: comfortability, and the more aesthetic ideas of what he’s thinking (the fuzz, the face, the colors), as well as price margins in all of those areas, compared against prices margins of similar headphones

[punkscowardschampions]

Ali & Carly

Ali: Heyo boo Ali: thanks for Rocky wrangling with me today, you're now also his fave so, add that to your tally Carly: its k i had fun Carly: hes a cutie & cool kid Ali: me too Ali: yeah, he's alright, but cocky enough so I ain't telling him Ali: dunno where he gets that from 😏 Carly: ha Carly: yea idk Carly: no clue Ali: i'm sorry Ro was being off btw, I'm working out why but trust it wasn't you, babe Ali: been neglecting her lately, everyone wants a piece of me Ali: hard life Carly: idc its me too Carly: nobody wants a piece but you Ali: I just told you that ain't true, and Rocky is ruthless, he called one of my customers a 'big bum witch' the other day Ali: no tip for me, thanks dickhead Ali: but I want all of you regardless Ali: willing to throw hands Carly: aw Carly: this town is full of big bum witches tho Carly: my ma back for one Carly: but are you willing to use those hands for good too or Ali: awks if that was your Ma, like hey gurl, I think you rock it Ali: your daughter ain't bad either Ali: you know it, IOU 'cos we couldn't make like we were in the backrow of the cinema Carly: unless she been lying about where she at i think youve avoided meeting the in laws again Carly: k cuz you kno i need to collect soon Carly: bored Carly: just back and zoned out so fast Ali: ain't even got exciting stories from their galavanting? fucking rude Ali: at least when we go AWOL we also go wild Ali: make things happen, lads Carly: my ma's good for nothing but hairspray and peroxide Carly: only use if i get beat up again Carly: my da's good for cash tho if you wanna get wild w me Ali: or you wanna single white female me Ali: which would be a disappointing outcome to say the least Ali: can't tonight babe, I've gotta have some sister time Ali: go hard for both of us Carly: k Carly: try not to miss me bad when shes talking about me Ali: oh babe, she will not, and if she does I'll set her straight Ali: gonna let the world know you're my 😇 Carly: whatever her issue shes gotta air it and youre her sister so you gotta hear it Carly: idc shes not gonna hurt me w it Carly: and setting peeps straight is the opposite of how you do, babe Ali: true Ali: idk what issue she could have though, you're a literal ray of sunshine Ali: true again 😏 Ali: ugh, imma miss you Ali: maybe i can sneak out when she's gone to bed, the 'rents too Carly: i miss you now Carly: cant hear my parents say shit Carly: i just wanna talk to you Carly: dont tell me maybe & keep me waiting tho Ali: i will Ali: promise Carly: i dont wanna make trouble for you Carly: w anyone Carly: you can stay w her if you need to stay Ali: You won't Ali: I can do both Ali: be back before first light Ali: even if I'll miss watching the sun rise on your face 😔 Ali: we've got the night, baby Carly: but you kno if ive got you for the whole night youre gonna fall asleep Carly: thats what im good at Carly: feel free to tell your sister thats why you like me ha Carly: fun & tiring its magic Ali: hmm, we'll see who wears who out first, babe Ali: and if I am that husband, then you'll just have to wake me up with morning sex like the good little wifey you are 😘😂 Carly: always bringing that confidence i like it Carly: k but if my parents wake up too you can explain its a duty thing yea i had to like Ali: i like you Ali: for so many reasons and imma show you all of 'em tonight Ali: fuck that Ali: stay out with me, its warm enough Ali: i'll trace all the constellations out with my tongue so you won't ever forget Ali: educational Carly: my ma is asking me what im blushing about Carly: i told her what you said but she's not a believer Carly: support my education bitch Carly: ha Ali: i mean, i'd offer to let her see the benefits for herself but Ali: not gonna win me any brownie points 'cos she won't take me up on it Carly: she dont kno what she's missing but i do Carly: wish you were here Ali: me too Ali: start the party without me babe, i don't mind Carly: too late if you do Carly: gotta get through this reunion some way Ali: they aren't making you watch a slideshow, are they? Ali: fate worse than death Ali: Maybe you could go to Ronan's? Lmao, he's been up in my pussy way too much since he found out about us...didn't think we were THAT loud but ok boy Carly: yea Carly: might do cuz same Carly: but what if i miss you he can really make a night of it when he wants Ali: Nah, I won't let you face that disappointment, babe Ali: my spidey senses will tingle like not on my watch, fuckboy Carly: aw Carly: you gonna come get me? Carly: thats no way to get him out your pussy babe fyi Ali: yeah Ali: I know but I like the idea of showing you off as mine Ali: but no sharing, he only gets to watch and be mad he fucked it up Carly: i like it too Carly: youre hot when youre oneupping fuckboys Carly: i thought i knew how to do it best but k youre flipping the script Ali: as long as i'm besting them i'm doing my job right Ali: gotta keep you on-board Carly: speak of the devil Carly: how he know i was alone & horny Carly: my parents have only gone to the shops its uncanny Ali: know your neighbours but bit stalkerish, pal Ali: i'll text him to fuck off, freak him out Ali: how does she know, ha, two can play this game fucko and I'm more committed Carly: ha Carly: you gotta Carly: hes smoking im gonna bum one see what line he tries to lay on before the text sends Ali: On it Ali: gotta let him know there's a queue to court the princess now and he's at the back, soz Carly: he likes hitting it from the back he wont be put off Carly: im gonna show him some of the hot pics i took of you tho Ali: when is he ever tbf? 🐶👅💦 Carly: true Carly: that fucking cute tho aren't i Ali: you know it babe Carly: hes talking to my da now Carly: kill me Ali: how fucking dare he Ali: knowing he has the upper hand with the man bants Ali: i know how to change a tire too! love me! Carly: if my ma invites him in for tea im out of here Carly: she will think hes hot under the collar for her & bitch thats my groundwork Ali: Run baby run Ali: what kinda moron is he tho Ali: coulda had a private show if you just waited, now its all saturday night telly and flat lager Carly: you kno i have nowhere to go if you dont want me babe Carly: facts Carly: he likes me now he cant have me what a fucking Carly: like i wouldve fucked you but im not getting w you Ali: i do, is this full sos crisis mode though? 'cos i need to be good for a lil while longer yet Ali: such a typical bloke move that Ali: bet he ain't the only boy in ur inbox, not a pun Ali: 'cos he ain't in mine like 🙄 Carly: its k your sister needs you Carly: i can keep walking Carly: loads of other lads on site as well as in my inbox Carly: & they arent trying to say hi to me before we get down to it nevermind my parents Ali: 😾 Carly: why so sad blue eyed boo Ali: i don't like how lads treat you Ali: i'm not jealous, like swear to god, even though i obviously want you all to myself, i get it Ali: but i'm not about how shit they are to you, even if you don't care, they should care to be decent humans Carly: thats not lads its everyone Carly: youre the only one treating me different Carly: they dont know how else to be Carly: made my bed babe Ali: nah Ali: you don't deserve half the shit you get, that's bullshit Ali: and even the rest, people just don't wanna try to understand or be good, heaven forfend they inconvineince themselves for one second, like Carly: if im a slag im a slag i dont get to put conditions on it Carly: if it was a film maybe Carly: but theres no romance coming my way from theres and i dont want it Ali: why can't you just be you? someone who likes fucking, among other things Ali: not romance just like...not being a cunt Ali: idk Ali: pisses me off Carly: cuz you don't run the world even tho you strut it like you do and i love it Ali: not yet, babe Ali: one day, and you can be my right hand woman Carly: yea? Carly: take me w you & ill take you to all your fave places k Ali: k Ali: we'll be fun forever, I promise you Carly: gotta be Ali: you know i like you even when you ain't tho Ali: don't tell Carly: who would i Carly: ronans got enough for his wank bank & nobody else is chatting to me rn Ali: exactly, ruins the illusion and fantasy when they realise i care about you Ali: so unsexy of me Carly: youre sexy to me Carly: idc what they think Ali: good Ali: me either Carly: i like you too you kno Ali: yeah Ali: i had my suspicions Carly: i dont have any subtlety sorry about it Ali: Don't be Ali: I love it Ali: not enough people say what they mean or want, ever Carly: waste Carly: k i wasnt shouting how bad i wanted to kiss you before i did but not cuz i was bothered about me Ali: agreed Ali: sometimes you can't know you want something until you've got it Ali: i get it Carly: you get me Carly: its weird Ali: 🔮 Carly: ha Carly: k what am i thinking now Ali: wouldn't be proper to say Ali: tut tut bad girl Ali: like how you think though Carly: fuck Carly: youre good Ali: 🤷 don't mean to brag but remember that phrase you'll be screaming it later Ali: such a Ronan line, I can't 😂 Carly: but true Carly: not like when he says it Ali: 😍 Carly: what you doing w your sister Carly: gotta live through that cuz bored Ali: Fixing my weave Ali: getting into a white girl dread territory over here Ali: then gonna do some 🔮 forreal Ali: get ready for me to be even more of a know it all baby Carly: cute Carly: tell me my future i got some shit from another neighbor & im waiting for it to kick Carly: hows it gonna treat me Carly: needing a good trip Ali: we'll see who gets the answer first Ali: you got anything for me? Carly: yea Carly: they mystery but i kno you arent scared Carly: & you got me doing a test run rn lying on here on the grass Ali: 🌌 be there before it fades away my space explorer Carly: if you find me at a bad end prob dont take it Ali: is one of the lads trip sitting you Carly: so he reckons but hes drinking so theres no trust Carly: & he gave me it Carly: his game could be me lights out idk Ali: keep texting me, okay babe? Ali: if shit gets too real, tell me and I'll come early Ali: my sis is cool now, she gets what we're doing, she was just confused Carly: aw Carly: youre sweet Carly: you told her you like me Ali: 'course I did Ali: I ain't ashamed Ali: I'm proud Carly: youre gonna make me cry Ali: You're special, Carly Ali: You're gonna see Carly: I just wanna see you tho Ali: Me too Ali: I'm gonna make her some chamomile tea and then I'm coming, yeah? Carly: but thats not fair to her Carly: she's not gonna be a fan of me Ali: I've promised her more time tomorrow Ali: You need me rn Carly: but what if i want you to stay Carly: what are we gonna do then Ali: i'll stay until you're ready for me to go Carly: you mean that? Ali: yes Ali: promise, imma take care of you Carly: but theres nothing in it for you Carly: youve already got me you dont have to Ali: i wanna keep you Ali: and not just selfishly Ali: you gotta stick around, you're too cool to go anywhere, okay Carly: k Carly: im here & if you wanna be im not stopping you Ali: good Ali: i wanna be wherever you are Carly: i kept you pills back the lads didnt want me to but idc about them & you can follow me in now Ali: fuck them Ali: just me and you Carly: yea Carly: ill look after you too Ali: 😇 Ali: i know, i trust you Carly: idk if you should Carly: but i like it Ali: willing to take my chances Ali: you're worth it Carly: thats you Ali: i'm so glad i met you Carly: me too Carly: not that i met me thats weird Carly: you know what i mean Ali: i got you Ali: not high yet 😉 Carly: id seen you around before you guardian angel'd me that night Carly: thats weird too Carly: that i didnt see you how i do now Ali: it is Ali: you were always cute but Ali: idk, i can't claim to have seen this in my crystal ball Carly: thats cuz i wasnt cute i was a state Carly: & youd have more likely seen me sucking ronans dick Carly: look away babe you dont need to have that image in your mind Ali: don't need him reckoning he plays part in any of my fantasies, nah Ali: you can't not be cute, no matter how you try, soz babe Carly: you can't not be so sweet to me can you Ali: dunno Ali: not tried Carly: idk what id do if you did Carly: i got used to it Ali: got no plans to stop Ali: unless you ask me to, like Carly: thats not gonna be what i ask you to do Carly: trust me Ali: you can tell me all about it Ali: 5 minutes, tops Carly: okay

[stress-bob]

HERE WE GO

Ok. Worked out, cleaned my room, paid credit card payment, paid rent, posted my probably-wont-make-progress-but-maybe progress picture, and smoked a bowl. My body is ready.

So I was talking about what happened around the time Dea and I broke up recently with a friend, and made me think that it’s been awhile since i’ve sorted through it. Figured why not put as much as I can remember down ~a year and a half later.

Buckle up buttercup,This gonna be looooooooong.

My order of things might be a little muddled, there was a lot going on at the same time.

So let’s back up to before we actually broke up!

For about a year prior I was getting real stressed out about my job. I was in a customer service position working for her Dad actually. He owned a Diesel shop, and had a Company owner in Italy who he was buddies with. Marco (italy guy), asked him to set up a place in the US to service his customer base.

I was going to college at the time, and decided I didn’t want to pass up a really interesting opportunity. I’m mostly glad I did. Anyway, I dropped out to work full time here and ended up making some good money. Most of what I did was answer phone calls and help people solve issues (99.9% of the time they caused) . At some point we started going to trade shows, and that was super super fun. I would fly out, set up a pop up tent and the whole shebang.

I was also sent to Mexico two different times for something similar. Except this one, it was with our distributor who was huge. They took their top 100 dealers on a “land cruise” (used to be an actual one, but they do resorts now), and about 25 manufacturers would pay ~20k to fund and attend this. During 3 of the 6 days, the 100 dealers would be set up at tables or 5. Basically think of speed dating. We’d each go around and give a 30 minute pitch about our product to these guys, answer questions, etc. I believe it was 4-5 hours each of the 3 days. You’d think an introvert like me would have a hard time with that, but it was actually a BLAST.

So what was the issue with the job?

Two big things. Dea’s dad (Rip), and a co worker of mine. I worked with a buddy of mine Adam, and he was fantastic. But we had this other co worker who was an old hick from Idaho (buddy of Rip’s) who was to handle our forum and some online stuff. For most of the time I worked with him it was fine. At some point he got really nasty. We had our own forum going on, and a buddy of his helped set it up for us. There were a lot of stupid things that happened surrounding that.

So eventually he’s outright hurling insults at me basically daily on the private side of this form (for a WHILE), and Rip wouldn’t do shit about it. On top of that, Rip had his own shitshow of a shop to run on top of it, and he’s old and tired. But he wouldn’t really give us the autonomy we needed so we could prioritize and get things done with what we had. We can’t be expected to try to learn fucking SEO while answering calls, updating the website, doing sales etc etc infinity fucking etc. Too much do be done with two people, and it was all expected to be done.

Eventually I was donezos, sent him a longwinded 2000 word email about exactly what I had problems with and why i was leaving (prob still have it).

So during the culmination of my work bullshit, that’s when Dea and I’s problems are starting to come to a crossroad. To be completely fair with myself, this was a long time coming. Tbh not sure exactly how long, but it probably should have been over before this went down.

We’ve always had communication problems. I think fundamentally we just don’t understand each-other well. Sure we both could have pointed out a lot of habits and what each would have done in certain situations, things we liked. But that’s not really the type of understanding i’m talking about.

The first time I realized something might happen is when she asked me about how I felt about polyamory. It’s something I had thought about before, because other women are definitely attractive. But with how long we’d been together, I knew it would bring up a lot of really jealous feelings that wouldn’t be pretty. So when she asked, I answered pretty matter-of-factly that it wasn’t going to work for me.

Looking back she was watching a lot of shows about poly life around this time, fun tidbit.

I wouldn’t say this answer upset her necessarily....but she was clearly idk, put off? Maybe disappointed.

IIRC she eventually asked again, and my answer remained the same. I think this was what spurred the discussion of “I don’t know if this what I want”. I did know what I wanted. She didn’t. What else can I do but wait until she does figure it out? I’m not that type of person that’s going to try and influence her. I could have tried to convince her she would be happy if she stayed or some bullshit. I loved her, and if not being with me is the way it needs to be? Them’s the breaks. I was also so SO tired emotionally. I had nothing left to give at that point.

So she breaks up with me. I think I left to walk to 7-11 at this point, because I needed a break. I don’t actually remember that well. I wasn’t around her right then, regardless. Maybe we were in our room when we broke up. Anyway Not that long after she breaks up with me(5 mins, half hour?), she’s crying and didn’t want to break up.

And of course I didn’t either. That lasted about a month, and she does it for real. Now here’s where the fun stuff started!

Sometime before or shortly after this I found out my Mom has an autoimmune disease that will kill her sooner or later. It’s very possible this is what her contributed to her mom dying when I was 8. So scary stuff yeah?

I quit my job, because FUCK that noise. It was too much.

I stayed living in the same house, but different room. Big mistake. I trusted her ability to communicate too much. Not that mine was stellar (we’ll get into this).

My parents divorce. Which hey, go be happy Mom! Again, sorry Dad, them’s the breaks. Happened to me to not even a month prior. But no, they both decided to be giant shitters. I think my Mom definitely did worse things to him, and to the family. He definitely said some nasty shit too though.

My mom decides to encourage my dad to go visit some family in Ohio (maybe he was thinking about it already? he reconnected with them recently at this point). By the time he comes back, she has a “friend” staying in the house. I feel like she said he was just staying for a while. Well my dad aint dumb, and this is the guy that has been in love with my mom forever, apparently.

She lied to the family a bunch, introduced my sisters kid to Frank even though she SPECIFICALLY told her not to. Her fucking kid’s grandparents split up. Shes like 7 for fucks sake. My sister was LIVID. Like didn’t let my mom see her granddaughter for many months livid. It’s hard to get that trust back. On top of lying to my sister plenty etc etc.  I don’t even want to get into frank right now.

I also had about 9 grand saved up at this point, and decided to not work for awhile and take care of my mental state. I literally could not work anymore after the breakup, and my parents bullshit. Another side note, but a root canal decided to cost me $1500 out of pocket a few months in. Probably like $2k total with the other stuff. Great timing, life. I think I was doing a “staycation” for like, 8 months? ish?

So here I was, jobless (had $$ tho tbf), freshly broken up with, super fucking depressed, stuck in the middle of my parents bullshit when i don’t even have enough for myself (and i’m a grown ass fucking adult too)[[, and just generally lost. Really really lost.

I just remembered. Something that made me pretty angry at the time (guess what leads to resentment?). Very shortly after we broke up, Jordan (the good friend he is), decides to try and set up a guys night for me at john’s house (jordan lived with karis at this point). Of course the bros say “hell yeah!” as they are wonderful. We invite Dex too, because why not?

The time rolls around, Jordan can’t go. Dex does show up at some point. Here’s what happened: Dea was really hurt because people were all getting together to make me feel better, i guess? I don’t remember the wording but....i think she felt like nobody was being her friend in that moment I guess? It was her home alone. And for context we got together every saturday for years pretty much, so I do kinda get it. She was also actually pretty mad at Dex because he showed up. She didn’t invite ANYBODY to do anything. So Jordan had to stay with Karis to comfort her, basically.

Like dude. YOU broke up with me. I get it was also really hard for you too, but put the shoe on the other foot for a goddamned second and consider how I felt in all this. Also consider I didn’t set any of this up. Also consider that you didn’t tell anybody that you needed a friend. I did. Don’t get mad at us for this, fuck.

Here’s where the “this-is-why-i-shoulda-moved-out” happens.

Let me say this up front. I expected Dea to bring back dates. This was definitely part of the deal of still living there. I get it. And I did figure she will be comfortable finding someone sooner, given the poly thing.

She brought someone over about 2 months after we broke up, and had mentioned nothing about this.

Now how this played out, was the night before she says “Hey i’m gonna have a friend over tomorrow”. I just say ok. Didn’t really matter because I didn’t have anywhere I could just go on moments notice like that. Coupla days to figure it out woulda been nice, thanks.

Turns out, it’s a dude that been over before. He was Taylors husband (they were poly before they split) who was at our holloween party like half a year before. To top it off, I got to hear the wonderful sounds of them having sex down the hall. Fucking thanks for that. Happened twice too.

You just shut down yeah? Or maybe that’s just me. How am I supposed to feel 2 months after breaking up a 9 year, third of my fucking life relationship, and within 2 months you’re banging a dude while i’m like 2 rooms over AND CAN HEAR YOU. And a dude that’s been over before for the cherry. FUCK man. I still get a little animated about that one.

Those were the big things. A great way to wrap up the whole burrito though? Dex and I were both given 1 months notice to leave from Rip. MY understanding of the local law was that 2 months is required if you’ve been month to month for more than 1 year (6 years...). He didn’t care, or knew I wouldn’t lawyer up. Whatever. The last and final fuck you was the day I went to get the rest of my shit. BEFORE the time on the notice, the locks were changed. Here I am, at 8 in the morning with a U haul we rented, and we can’t get in the house to get my stuff. What. The. Flying. Fuck.

I sure as shit wasn’t going to talk to Dea at ALL at this point, so I called him and he came down. And he sat there the entire time waiting for us and doing bills. Jesus fuck dude. Like, you think i’m gonna murder your daughter or something ffs?

I think I got most of it. I’ve got some stuff with my current living situation, but it’s really peanuts compared to everything else. I‘m also like, idk fairly happy right now too in general so. I’ve grown a lot, and that gives me some comfort.