#i wonder if ill feel the same after this first season finishes and if they will allow for more

[frogmascquerade]

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[vanishingcherry]

hi! would you be able to do the “ now you want me like i wanted you” prompt with lando? thanks <3

MEMORIES

send in a prompt from this list with a character/driver and ill write a blurb!

masterlist

๑ ⋆˚₊⋆────ʚ˚ɞ────⋆˚₊⋆ ๑

You had always been involved in the world of racing, specifically Formula 1. From a young age you would watch the races, cheering for your favourite team and favourite driver, something that changed almost everyday depending on your mood.

When you found out that Lando, a boy from your school was interested in the sport, you immediately became best friends, spending all day, every day talking about racing. You stayed best friends for years, but nothing could stop your growing affection for the boy.

Your confession had been, admittedly, poorly timed. It was right before, arguably, the most important season of his life thus far. He had finally made it into F2, and needed to spend all his time on racing. But his tone and his words were something you were never able to forgive, you'd think being best friends with someone for years would at least guarantee a certain degree of respect.

"Y/N I can't! This is important to me and I need to put all my focus towards racing, I don't have time for your feelings."

"I get that Lando, I'm not saying you have to ignore the championship. I just wanted you to know how I feel, its not like I expected you to act on it immediately."

"Look. I don't want you, not now not ever. Get the thought of us out of your mind, the thought of me out of your mind. You're a distraction, thats all."

The memory of that fight was always unwelcome, but you weren't going to let a boy, especially Lando, ruin your love for racing. From that day forth, you cast him out of your mind, separating your love for the sport from the memory of him.

You had been invited to a Grand Prix by Alex, who you had met when you were younger and attended races with Lando as support. The two of you had stayed good friends, and you were excited to watch a race in person.

You were stood in a corner of the garage, watching the mechanics finish up last minute preparations when you felt a hand tap your shoulder.

"Lando." you said, spotting the bright orange suit after turning around.

"Um hey Y/N. Alex said that you were here, and I was wondering if we could talk?" He stutters through the question.

"We don't have anything to talk about."

"Darling I- I'm sorry, about what I said. I've missed you every day since then and I just want you back in my life. I was hoping we could talk and figure things out?"

"And thats why you waited 3 years to talk to me again?" Your voice is cold, not wanting to let any emotions slip past. Your feelings for Lando had long since disappeared, and all you felt for him now was contempt.

"I didn't know what to say or how to say it, love. But when I found out you were here I knew I had to talk to you."

You sigh. "Lando, I was your best friend and you treated me like shit. Its fine that you didn't feel the same way I did, but you didn't have to call me a fucking distraction and stop talking to me."

"I know and I'm so sorry. I swear i'll make it up to you I promise, I just- I have to tell you something. I love you, I love you so, so much and I need you in my life. Darling I- its killing me that I hurt you and I need a chance to fix this. Please, just one chance." The desperation is visible in his voice, eyes pleading.

"Now you want me, like I wanted you?" You could almost laugh at the irony, saying the first words that came to mind at his confession.

"Yes." Lando replied instantaneously, knowing what you were thinking, and knowing that he deserved it.

He had messed up, and he had spent hours thinking of things he could do to get you to forgive him. But as years passed, he grew more and more scared of talking to you, regretting his decision more than anything in the world when he realised just how much of an impact you had on his life. Just how much he missed you and just how much he loved you.

"I know I fucked up, and I'm willing to do anything to fix this. Anything, I swear."

"I think its best if you go back to your garage now."

His face fell at your suggestion. Some part of him had stayed optimistic, and he could feel that warmth slipping through his fingers. "Wait! Please, please Y/N. I'm so sorry, you aren't a distraction, you're the only thing I want, the only thing I care about."

"Lando, maybe at some point in the future, we can be friends again. But I don't think I could trust you to that level again." Your voice has a sense of finality to it, and Lando knew it was the best deal he could get. He did mean it when he said he wanted you to be in his life. If this was the way you wanted, then so be it.

He nodded. "Okay. Whatever you find comfortable. I- Just please know that I'm sorry, and that I do really love you."

He left the garage after saying that, silently walking back to his own. It was his fault, he knew that. He would just have to make do with the memories.

[jj-5656]

First and Last With; James Potter

A/N: Hello again! I finally finished that wonderful request, so sorry it took forever. Football (NFL playoffs) and school preparations have kept me preoccupied. Winter break is over and I’m absolutely devastated. For anyone in college, I wish you luck for this Spring Semester. But with that being said, school starting back up means I likely won’t upload as much. So I apologize in advance. Regardless, I hope this makes up for the wait on this request. To the lovely anon and all others, enjoy!

Summary: The one where the Marauders vacation to the Potter’s beach house, and a revealing drinking game ensues...

TW: Descriptions of panic attacks, Sirius is an ass as usual, a lot of mutual pining.

   “Marlene, you have packed half of your house and more, it’s just a week’s vacation.”

“Anything could happen, Sirius. Better to be over prepared than under prepared.”

“I’m just happy James is filthy rich.” Dorcas deadpans, straightening when you and Lilly shoot her a disapproving look. “And so, very generous at the same time.”

“I’m not filthy rich.” James laughs, taking your bags from your grasp and loading them into the trunk for you. Amongst all of your friends belongings, piled high enough to reach the top of the van you’ve rented for the adventure. “We’re just...Comfortable.”

“That’s what all rich people say.” You and Remus look to each other, stunned at your simultaneous blunt confessions. 

“Shush, the lot of you.” Lilly chides, never sparing commonalities. 

“Remind me why we couldn’t just use floo powder? I’m already sweating, and my complexion does not do well in heat.” Sirius fans himself dramatically. James allows you to lift yourself over the mountains of bags with his arm for support in order to reply. 

“When have any of you experienced the adventure of a road trip?” You’re beaming at the thought, James takes your distraction as an opportunity to admire your unusually giddy attitude. Though the real reason you’re so eager to be away from home pulls at his mind, his grin faltering. He pokes your side, grabbing your attention. 

“Miss sunshine gets shotgun, I’ve called it.”

“Prongs, I thought you’d have wanted me to be your passenger princess?”

“Absolutely not, though I’ll miss those luscious locks of yours. I’m driving, so I select my navigator.”

“You’ve been there a million times.” You note, crossing your arms incredulously. James smirks, placing his burgundy and gold quidditch cap atop your head. 

“I’d much rather you keep me company.” He says so only you can hear, unknowing of your flushing when he turns back to Sirius. “Pads, Moons is gonna need a pretty view, it’s fortunate he’ll have you in the middle seat.”

“I’m reading! Reading this entire time, very busy.” Remus teases, pleased with the raven-haired boy’s mock offense. 

You round the corner of the van after checking the trunk for the fourth time, positive you haven’t forgotten any supplies for the trip. James is at the passenger side, holding the door open for you. He’s got a pair of prescription sunglasses on, and looks very different. No less handsome, if anything, the shades accentuate the bravado you’ve always envied. His arms are especially toned after another quidditch season, tanned from the summer sun you’ve missed so dearly. You’re staring. 

“Systems ready, co-pilot?” He beams down at you, pulling his cap over your eyes in teasing. You stick a tongue out at him, pulling his arms away so you can  adjust it right again. 

“I feel silly in this.”

“Nonsense, you look adorable. My clothes suit you.” He defends, so casual you don’t let the words resonate until after he’s shut your door and rounded to the drivers side. 

“Enjoy the passenger seat, princess.” Sirius sneers, pouting despite not holding any true ill-will. 

“Gladly.” 

************

“Are we there yet?” 

“No, Dorcas. Just like we weren’t there ten minutes ago.” James glances at the girl through the rearview, slightly amused with her childish complaints. 

“You know, we could just pull over and-”

“No floo powder!” You and Lilly shout to Sirius, hoping not to have awoken a sleeping Marlene and Remus. Sirius covers their ears, both of them having dropped their heads on each one of his shoulders some time throughout their slumber. You finish fiddling with the radio when a good song comes on, taking a moment to look at the lot of your friends all corralled in the van. 

“Where’s the camera, James?” 

“On my side door here, I’ll pull over if you want it.” 

“Oh, so you’ll pull over for her.”

“Shut it, Pads.” 

“No need, I can reach it.” You lean over the seat, careful not to block his view of the road as you quickly grab it. James swallows, clears his throat to act natural whilst all of his insides begin to burn. 

“Hot?” Is all you ask, studying his discomposure.

“What?” He starts, voice shaky and strained. Sirius falls into a fit of muffled laughter from the back, leaving you confused. “J-Just a little warm, yeah.” Potter recovers, now well aware you were inquiring about temperature. You turn up the AC, taking the cover off the lens and pointing the camera toward the back. Sirius smiles wide for the camera, handsome features lighted by the early afternoon sun. Marlene and Remus drool along on his shoulders as Lilly beams brightly from the back. Looking positively radiant, as always. Dorcas smiles, but holds up her favorite finger to the lens. You grin,full of adoration for the entire lot of them as you snap a couple photos, ensuring they’re all in the frame. 

James admires in increments from the rearview, blowing a raspberry to the camera when you point it at him. 

“Eyes on the road, Potter.” He shakes his head, running a hand over the steering wheel in a mindless habit as he hears the camera snap. Looking over quickly to smile at the lens. Effortlessly handsome, as usual. 

“We have to take as many pictures as possible this week.” You demand, getting excited all over again for the much needed vacation, spent with all your best friends, no less. 

You roll down your window even more, sticking your head to enjoy the warm, salty air. It smells of the beach, grass, all things green and beautiful. You’re so happy your head spins, giggling to yourself as you catch Lilly doing the same behind you. Meeting her eyes in the side mirror and scrunching your nose when she blows a kiss, an embellished hand pretending to capture it in the air and holding it to your heart. 

James does a double take from his view of the road and then you. Trying to stay focused and not find any distraction in your adorably delighted mood. His brows furrow when you shuffle forward, aiming to get even more of your body out of window the feel the entirety of what this beautiful view has to offer.

“Absolutely not.” He chastises, a finger hooking onto your belt loop and tightening. His eyes are on the road, one hand on the wheel as he tugs you back inside. 

“Lame!” You whine, hitting his arm in distaste. 

“I prefer my friends with their pretty heads in tact, thank you.” 

You settle in your seat, still full of delight but a little more contemplative as you think about what got you here.

“Summer vacation!” Sirius throws himself between you and Remus during lunch. Gathering an assortment of food on his own plate. You’ve barely eaten, stomach turning at the thought of being home for two months. You’re nudged from under the table, meeting James’ gaze, whose eyes avert to your abandoned plate. A subtle request for you to eat. You offer a weak smile, shrugging before your friends go on. 

“Two whole months without exams.” Marlene adds, absolutely pleased with not having to spend another second with her nose in a book. 

“We’ll be seventh years, I can hardly believe it.” You’ve considered Lilly’s words the entirety of this last month of classes, absolutely dreading going home. Hogwarts is more home than your house would ever be, and your friends are the only real family you have. You lose your breath at this, biting at the nail of your thumb and wincing when it draws blood. 

“I’m gonna head to the library,” You announce, blinking hard to fight the room from blurring. “Forgot to turn in my potions textbook.” It’s believable enough for the group to nod along, chorusing their farewells as you head out of the great hall. Heart racing and hands trembling. James takes only a moment, eyes following you the entire time. It’s not his business, but he knows that demeanor. He’s seen all of this before, in the boy he calls his best friend. Sirius Black, who leans forward and shoots James a look. Instantly, the chaser is on his feet, mumbling a feeble excuse and heading out of the hall in search for you. 

“I think he left the curling iron on.”

James searches the corridor wildly, all of the students being in the Great Hall makes the search easy, he can follow the sound of your fleeting footsteps with ease in this sea of silence. He follows your distant frame up a set of stairs, cursing to himself when they shift before he can follow your path. He’s searching for a new route, not wanting to shout to you and scare you even more.

There’s a lot of running, a couple instances of tripping over his own feet, but eventually Potter catches up to you. 

You’re sat in a windowsill beneath an overhang of a hallway above, curled in on yourself. James approaches carefully, trying to control his panting breaths. 

“Fuck, James!” You startle each other, studying the other instantly.

“You’re” the athlete coughs, winded, “so fast.” You smile, but it does little to calm you down, because as he gets closer, the view around him blurs, and everything sounds cloudy, distant. 

“I’m,” you try to form words, too loud because you can’t hear yourself properly. “F-fine.” You try to move, try escaping to prevent embarrassing yourself further. Clutching your chest and swiping at the flood of tears that can’t be ceased. 

“You’re not. You’re having a panic attack.” 

“Happened b-before,” you wheeze, staring at your hands to make sure they’re real “I’m good.” 

“And I’m a humble introvert that loves Slytherin, sit down.” You begin to wheeze, rubbing your hands over your legs to stop them from sweating, ground yourself maybe. “I’m gonna hug you, tight. Is that alright?” You nod, because you’re not entirely sure what he’s just said and it’s easier to comply. 

He encloses you in an embrace, loosening for only a second when you fight it. He’s squeezing again, but it’s not unpleasant. You’re shaking, and your breaths are still rapid. James swallows, terrified and unsure. Because all of this usually helps Sirius but he’s still kind of freaking the fuck out.

“Let’s talk about something.” He suggests, wincing when you hiccup for air in reply. “I know you’ll love this. What’s something about me that annoys you?” You’re aware he’s trying to distract you, and you feel like you’re dying, so you give it a go in the off chance it’ll help.

“You’re im-immature.”

“Good. But you’ve done better than that, love.” 

“You’re reckless. You play quidditch like,” you lick your lips, trying to control your trembling. “Like you’re indestructible.” 

“Attagirl, something else?”

“You’re picky, and...And you’re too stubborn to try new things.” James hums, recalling a time you’d forced him to drink pumpkin juice an he hurled in the lavatory minutes later. He rests his chin on your head, pleased when the added pressure slows your breathing. 

“You’d do anything for your friends, no matter the personal expense. It’s self destructive, p-probably exhausting.”

“Ouch. You really know how to flatter a man, love.” 

“I don’t want to go home.” You whisper, so quiet he’d miss it had he not been surveying your every move. The confession shocks even you, and James, for likely the first time in his life, is devastated to be right about something. 

“I’m not gonna let you. We’re going to figure this out. I’m gonna figure this out, I promise.” 

“You’re doing that thing again.” You note, wiping your nose with the sleeve of your robe. Further comforted in the feel of his chest vibrating against you from laughing.

“And you’re forming full sentences.” He loosens, giving you space to decide whether or not you want to separate.  You don’t, not right away, not when you can feel the strong, stable beating of his heart. 

“What am I gonna do? I can’t stay here over break. Even if Dumbledore allowed it, my family would-” You falter, unable to finish. James holds tight again, nauseated. 

“I promised. And I intend on keeping it, love.”

**********

“Land! Sweet, sweet land.” Sirius cries, throwing himself onto the freshly cut grass. 

“James, it’s stunning.” Lilly shades her eyes to admire the shore house. Standing taller than the others around it. 

“It’s home. Away from home, that is.” James shrugs, and you can’t help but feel a twinge of jealousy. There’s a faint, deep-rooted envy for the blessings your friends hold. Sirius rolls onto his back to look at you, the only one noticing your hunched shoulders amongst the rest of the group beginning to unload the van. 

“Shall we go inside, lovely? Get dibs on the best rooms while these common folk collect our luggage. He extends his arm for you to take, adjusting the sunglasses adorning his face and ignoring the displeased looks of your friends. Stealing a kiss to your temple as he leads you inside. 

“Moony, sweetheart, do be careful with my things. I’ll show you what bed to place them on.”

“Fuck off, Pads.”

“That’s Sir Padfoot, to you.” 

You and Sirius falter, shocked to see an older woman placing the finishings of a homemade meal on the large kitchen table. The inside is even more impressive than the out, but you don’t have much time to appreciate the decorum. Considering you’re engulfed in an oddly familiar embrace. 

“Welcome, welcome!” She beams, holding Sirius’ face and kissing his cheeks with small pinches. 

“How’s my Siri?”

“Alright, mum. Thanks. James didn’t mention you’d be here. Though it’s a very happy surprise.” He looks at the wrinkled, stunning woman that smells of lavender and tea like she’s hung every star in the sky. It’s then you make the obvious connection this is Mrs. Potter. 

“Oh, he doesn’t know either. I’m only here to make sure you’re all settled in and then I’ll be on my way. We haven’t visited here in a while, I wanted to be sure it looked alright for you all.”

“Hard to imagine it ever looks less than gorgeous,” you say without thinking, “thank you for having us. This is lovely.” 

“And so are you, dear. Sirius, tell me this beautiful young girl is with you?” She strokes your hair, and it’s the most comforting touch you’ve likely ever felt. 

“Only in my dreams, unfortunately. Unless dear y/n would like to make a wish come true?” You laugh, swatting away his puckered lips. 

“Y/n? Oh, I’ve been waiting to meet you! Sweetheart, Jamie talks about you so much in his letters!”

“Let’s get waste-Mum!” James drops the bag in hand, yours. Pulling the handle of liquor behind his back in pure shock. “What are you doing here?” 

“Thought I’d have a warm meal waiting for you kids. You must be starving after that drive. Though I’m so happy you did as opposed to powdering here. Shows some responsibility. And Jamie gets so sick sometimes with the powder and all-”

“Mum!” The taller boy repeats, setting the array of luggage in hand down and hiding the bottle behind it. 

“I’m doting, aren’t I? Remmy!”  She stops herself, rushing over to envelop the taller boy in her arms. He, just as Sirius, is absolutely pleased to see her. She goes down the line of girls, putting faces to names and genuinely loving every second of it. James sighs, no genuine distaste in his nature as he observes.

Sirius throws an arm over your shoulder, cheeky as ever. “Mum was just telling us about your letters home.” 

“You’re just as pretty as he said you were. All you girls are so beautiful!” She goes on, blissfully unaware of her beet-red son. 

“She exaggerates.” James scratches his neck, skin burning with embarrassment. 

“Does she?” Siris pulls you closer, basking in your shared humiliation. 

“This food looks wonderful Mrs. Potter. Thank you so much for thinking of us.” Lilly clasps her hands together, rolling her eyes fondly at James’ indebted glance. 

“Call me Euphemia, please. And yes, you all must be starving. Come, fill those bellies with something warm.” You’re in a state of shock as you sit, unaccustomed to such hospitality and genuine kindness. It’s evident where James gets his big heart, undying selflessness. 

The food is amazing, you all go for seconds with a chorus of shared appreciation and compliments. Euphemia beams as she collects her things, pleased to meet the lot of friends her son cares for so deeply. 

“All the beds have fresh sheets, and there’s extra throw blankets in the linen closet. Jamie, your father says go easy on the fire whisky. He’d ask for no drinking, but we all know that’s a long shot. Don’t break anything, and Remmy, keep everyone in check.” The taller boy nods swiftly, no doubt having heard the orders before. James gets up from his seat, kissing his mothers cheek and enveloping her in a hug. 

“Thank you mum, seriously.” She fixes his hair, wiping invisible smudges from his face in a fit of doting. 

“No problem, I’m glad you were all able to make it here. You’re welcome to stay as long as you’d like. All of you.” Theres a quick moment where she meets both you and Sirius’ eyes, the two of you nodding with feigned smiles. Quickly, she kisses both Moony and Padfoot’s heads, stopping for only a moment to caress your cheek with her thumb, a faint sadness in her gaze. Everyone else is enveloped in conversation, passing servings across the table as they would at the Great Hall. 

“You’ll keep an eye on my Jamie, won’t you?” She whispers, touch soothing you with an unknown ease. 

“Of course, though I’m not sure he needs it.” You hold her wrist, somehow not minding the affection whatsoever. 

“So he likes to think. He does, really, speak so fondly of you in his letters. You’re even more lovely than he described.” You want to cry, so overwhelmed with her generosity and love, a maternal energy so strong it’s wiped your mind of any anxieties. 

“Alright, mum. Let the poor girl eat.” James guides her toward the fireplace, while his mother pats his arm and says something to him you don’t quite catch. James’ ears burn bright red, and he nudges her gently so she’ll stop looking over at you. The rest of the group turns toward the fireplace, echoing their farewells and gratuity as she waves. Floo powder enveloping the space around her and sending her off. 

“Does that turn your stomach just looking at it, Jamie?” Marlene mocks, the rest of your laughing through bites of food as he flips her off. 

“Fuck off, the lot of you.” 

“We should start cleaning up.” You suggest, taking your own plate and bringing it to the sink. “This way we can unpack before the sun sets.” Lilly follows, taking her and Dorcas’ plate to you as you begin washing. Sirius groans, grabbing a dish towel from one of the drawers and drying the dishes you hand him. 

“Can’t we just charm the sponges to clean these?”

“Dad had them countered so they can’t be charmed. Said it was supposed to teach me some ‘household responsibility.’” Sirius howls, thoroughly amused.

“I’m just curious about these detailed letters back home.” Remus mutters as he carries his plate past James, dodging his swings and rushing toward the group at the sink for safety. 

*****************

After everyone’s settled in, and you’ve all recovered from the ‘who called what room first’ arguments, there’s an obligatory round of shots. A bin begins to pile high with cans, and you’re all sat around a bonfire atop the Potter’s outdoor furniture. Even the furniture for the backyard looks expensive, so you clutch your drink in hopes not to make any spills. 

You’re buzzed now, skin tingling with an uncommon ease as you lean against the arm of the couch. Sea breeze easing the warm air as the fire pops in front of you. 

“Alright, none of you are drunk enough.” Sirius chastises, shifting in his seat and tossing Lilly another beer. “Never have I ever,” you all groan in half-assed annoyance as the name of the game sounds, “been snitched on by Peeves.” 

You and the rest of the girls take slow, ashamed, sips. The boys all looking over in amazement. 

“We snuck out one time! All I wanted was a bloody butter beer.” Marlene confesses, flushed. James stretches as he approaches, still sore from driving. He passes you his cup, grinning when you cringe at whatever concoction he’s come up with. You move your legs so he can sit beside you, the rest of the couches having been taken. 

“It was a terrible craving, but nonetheless worth the loss of points for Gryffindor.” 

“Is that why we were tied with Ravenclaw mid semester?” Remus laughs over his cup. 

“We still won the cup!” You and Lilly defend, James taking hold of your legs to place them on top of his. He isn’t even thinking about it, too enthralled with the teasing conversation before him as he slides a hand under the cuff of your jeans. Warm hands calloused from quidditch running over your shin. You’ve always found affection with him comes easier than with others, and the touch comforts you, electricity lingering on your skin. 

“Never have I ever, had my first kiss.” Because Dorcas also aims to have the rest of you drinking more, she says what she thinks is the most common proposition. Your stomach turns, and you debate on taking a sip just because it’ll spare you the embarrassment. You must consider it too long, because Sirius’ brows shoot up in shock. 

“Merlin, how?” Is all Sirius manages, the girls’ jaws dropping because you’ve never told them. 

“I volunteer!” Marlene shoots a hand up while you curl into the cushions, wishing you’d just had the drink. 

“It’s not that there haven’t been opportunities.” You struggle through the explanation, tugging on the sleeves of your shirt to fight the cold. “I just, I guess, want the first one to matter. If it’s been this long I may as well make it special.” They all coo in mocking, laughing when you flip them off. 

“I get it.” James pats your leg, taking generous sips of his own drink. 

“You don’t.” Theres an amusement in your tone, no real meanness to any of it. 

“Well what about that Hufflepuff third semester, he was totally into you.” Dorcas inquires. 

“Are we seriously this interested in my love life, or lack thereof?” You roll your eyes when they all agree, giddy from the topic and the alcohol. “I thought he was into me, but I don’t know. We stopped talking after a while.”

“Wait,” Remus narrows his brows, too contemplative to see James’ signals. “That curly haired guy, beater for Huffle?” You nod, giggling because he’s not usually this slow to understanding, clearly inebriated. 

“Wasn’t that the kid that came up to us at Hogsmeade, Prongs?” Potter vehemently shakes his head, chugging his drink again. 

“Nope, I don’t think so.” 

“No, I’m pretty sure it was. You two didn’t get on that well, I think.” Sirius covers his mouth to muffle his laughing, basking in Moony’s drunken confession. 

“You sabotaged me!” You frown, James grabbing your leg so you can’t kick his side. 

“Listen, I overheard him boasting in the locker room. He’s not the type you should be around. Trust me.” He’s sincere, enough to make you relax. 

“He was a bit of an ass, sweetheart. Prongs isn’t entirely wrong.”

“You two are still snog-blocks.” Dorcas is quick at your defense, crossing her arms in solidarity.

“If I wasn’t banished to solitude, I’d kiss you, Dorcas.” 

“Time and place, lovely.” You clutch your heart, feigning a blush in your antics.

*********

“Alright, I need my beauty rest. Someone needs to remain the prettiest of the friend group.” Sirius stretches, tapping a dazed Remus on the cheek to get him up. His actions initiate the turning in of the rest of the group. To which you and James groan. 

“It’s only 2, you’re all lame!” Potter sneers, looking to you for consolation. You nod along, displeased with their departure. 

“You night owls can stay up as long as you want, but we have all week to be sleep deprived.” Marlene ruffles James’ hair and kisses your temple as she stupors inside, giggling all the way with the other girls. 

“And then there were two.” You stretch, moving over when James shifts, moving into a laying position. In order to fit comfortably, you still have to keep your legs over his. “You know, now theres three other open couches.”

“I like it here.” He decides, enclosing his hands over his chest and settling in. You chuckle, letting him tangle his legs in yours. 

It’s confusing, because he chooses you as his passenger, his seat-mate, scares other guys away. Fuck, he planned an entire trip just because you and Sirius have such shitty home lives. Guilt twinges in your chest, and the alcohol allows you to finally say what you’ve been holding in since you first got in the car. “James?” He hums, hazel eyes looking up at the array of stars in the night sky. “Why did you do all this?” Potter sits up, looking over to you in disbelief. 

“Why wouldn’t I? Don’t you like it here?”

“Like it? It’s a shore house filled with all of my closest friends and alcohol. I love it here.” He laughs, nudging your legs with his own in teasing. 

“I’ve been wanting to ask you something,” he starts, answering your question with one of his own. “Would you be willing to spend the whole summer here?” 

This time, you sit up, brows raised in shock. “Sorry?” 

“Instead of having to go home, you could stay here.” 

“James, I couldn’t possibly intrude like that-”

“It wouldn’t just be us two.” He unnecessarily reassures. “I’ve already spoke with Pads, and he’s staying. My mum doesn’t want him going home either.”

“You already talked to your parents about it?” 

“In the chance either of you said yes. They both are more than happy to have us stay here. There’s internship positions at my dad’s company, and he said if we looked after the house and helped him out, we’d be more than welcome to stay.” 

“Are you starting a shelter for the broken homes club or something?” You jest, not in poor taste, but because it’s the only defense mechanism you know. James frowns anyway, upset at the thought.

“I care about the both of you. And...I’d never want either of you going home to- Well, anything other than a place you feel safe. I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if something happened to you. Knowing I could have stopped it. Understand?”

You nod, warm tears brimming in your eyes. Because in a world full of people that don’t, James Potter cares. You tackle him in a hug, overcome with the foreign feeling of being cared about, protected. He falters, wrapping an arm around your waist with a small laugh. 

“That’s a yes, then?” You nod, smile pulling at your lips when he uses his thumb to wipe away your tears. 

“James?”

“Yeah?” He’s soft-spoken now, eyes studying yours as you press your hands to his chest. 

“Is there...Any other reason you told that guy to stay away from me?” He swallows, licking his lips with an unusual anxiety to him. He meets your eyes again, pleading for another hint.

“Would you want there to be?”

“I’d like to have my first kiss.” You play with a pull in his sweater, fighting a smile at his nervous demeanor. “Would you want it to be you?” He nods, slow, and honestly unsure if you’re fucking with him. Considering how embarrassed he’d be if this is some joke, or a dream, maybe. “James?” You move closer, and he snaps out of his daze.

“I would.” He averts his eyes to your lips, back to your eyes again to ensure you’re sincere. “Like to kiss you, I mean.” 

You remove the space between you, putting your lips to his and hoping it comes natural like everyone says. It must, because he’s pulling you into his lap, a hint of a whine escaping his throat. You grin, flushing at his eagerness. He squeezes your sides harder, a warning. 

“Stop it.”  He continues past your jaw, down your neck, hearts thrumming with excitement and uncertainty. He tilts your head with his thumb, grinning when he nips at your skin and you gasp. Pulling back, he surveys his work, kissing you two more times before letting you breath. 

Is that what I’ve been missing out on?” You pant, energy coursing through you and accentuating your buzz tenfold.

“Up to expectations?”

“Exceeded, I’m pretty sure.” You blink hard, taking hold of his wrists and moving them so they can slide under the hem of your shirt. You hold them at your waist, a silent sign to keep them there. Though you’re sure he would have anyway. He kisses you again, more intense this time, finally allowing all the pent up tension between the two of you release. 

James, against every fiber of being in his body, pulls you away from him. Both breathing hard to collect yourselves. “While I’d really, really like to keep this up.” He starts, trying not to reconsider when your perfume envelopes his senses. “I’d like to take you out for dinner first. If you’ll let me.”

“Are you asking me on a date, Potter?” You whisper, teasing him as if it’s the hottest gossip to reach Hogwarts. 

“Are you gonna say yes, pretty girl? Or leave me hanging?” You nod, and James throws his head back against the cushions, absolutely relieved. 

*************

You blink awake, fire still burning brightly after being charmed by Lilly earlier in the evening. In the midst of you and James conversation, filled with recalling old times, plans for the rest of the summer, and a lot more alcohol, you both fell asleep. James’ jumper covers your frame, while the boy lays on the other side with only a sweater to keep warm. 

“Prongs.” You nudge him, wincing when he groans. “It’s too cold, let’s go in.”

“Too tired,” he croaks, voice riddled with sleep, “too drunk. Come over on this side.” He rolls on his back, groaning again when the world spins with him. 

“What, like...Next to you?”

“No, curled up on the floor like a cat.” Your brows furrow at his sassiness, fighting a smile as you crawl over. Muttering a half-assed apology when you nearly knee his groin. 

Hesitantly, you place a head on his chest, letting him grab you under one knee and pulling it up so you leg rests over his abdomen. Immediately, he releases a deep breath, fully relaxed. Your body, though, tingles with that same electricity from before, keeping you awake. 

“Sleep.” He orders, nudging the back of your head with his shoulder, eyes closed but somehow aware.

“Can’t.”

“Is this alright?” He blinks awake, afraid he’s made you uncomfortable. 

“Good, this is good.” You reassure, pulling on his jumper so it covers both of you. He pushes your arm away, tugging on the fabric and covering only you again, stern in his actions. 

“Close your eyes. I need us both to sleep this alcohol off so I can kiss you again.”

“Who says I’ll let you, Potter?”

“I may have been your first kiss, but I’m also aiming to be your last. So please, Dove, shut up and sleep” You’re speechless, he’s stunned you with his confession and simultaneous attitude. 

“I hate you.”

“I seriously doubt that.” There’s a smile on his face, you can hear it in his grumbling voice. Wordlessly, he moves the arm that’s under you so he can stroke your cheek, eyebrows, and jaw with the hook of his finger. Knowing the gentle touch will send you off to sleep. And it does, because you don’t wake again until morning. 

********

“Rise and shine, love birds. If you want to hoot with the owls, you’ve got to fly with the eagles.” Sirius chimes, a click of a camera sounding out after he speaks.

“Any louder, Pads, and I’ll break your jaw.” James covers your ears, shielding you from your friends shrill laughter with an intense glare. His head pounds something awful, and he’s pretty sure he’s never been this hungover in his entire life. He remembers every second, though, memories of last night bringing a dopey smile to his face. Despite the alcohols consequences. 

“Hey.” He nudges your arm, ignoring the gawking of his friends through the glass sliding door as he wakes you. You yawn, stretching atop him and regaining sense of your surroundings. 

“Are we supposed to be spinning?” James rolls his eyes, much too fond of you for his own good. 

“We have to get up, theres breakfast.”

“I can’t eat a single thing right now.”

“Yes you can,” he pushes you again, sighing in feigned annoyance when you rub your face into his shirt. Shielding the morning light from your eyes. In one swift movement, he sits you both up and hurls you over his shoulder, ignoring your squirms of protest with an obnoxious yawn. He sets you down at the breakfast bar in the kitchen, grumbling a hello to your astonished group of friends. You’re too hungover to feel embarrassed, smiling a thank you to Remus when he slides his glass of orange juice toward you, Sirius’ sunglasses over his eyes. 

“Gimme those,” you plead, extending an arm that’s quickly swatted away.

“Get your own,” he whines, “I let you have my juice.” You accept this, nursing the glass as though it’ll save your life. 

“Late night?” Lilly teases, putting a plate of food in front of you and James. You both groan, but offer your gratitude for breakfast anyway. 

“Figured you would have at least made it inside.” Marlene chastises, amused with your zombie-like states. You frown when James finishes what’s left in your glass, watching as he leans across the counter to grab the carton and refills it. Sirius places a steaming cup of tea in front of you and Potter, avoiding your distrusting gaze as he clears his throat to speak. 

He’s awfully cheeky all the sudden, hoisting himself onto the counter with his signature mischievous grin. “Never have I ever…Had my first kiss?” His voice tilts in questioning at the end, and you’re momentarily displeased with the realization you’ll be spending the rest of the summer with the shit-starting bastard you consider a friend. 

You’re absolutely flushed, curling in on yourself when a chorus of cheers erupts after taking a swift sip from your mug.

[hooked-on-elvis]

The "Street suit", worn onstage by accident (1975)

TWO-TONED STREET SUIT | Other names: Penguin suit Used only once onstage, on August 19, 1975, at the Hilton Hotel in Las Vegas, Nevada, during the Midnight concert. Elvis wore the suit with a Black Macrame belt. Info from website elvisconcerts.com (Jumpsuit index)

According to the rumors, Elvis was late for the show that night and he had no time to change his clothes, so he just walked on-stage wearing what he had on at the moment: the Two-toned Street suit.

Elvis during concert in August 19, 1975, at the Hilton Hotel in Las Vegas, Nevada.

This sounds a little off to me, to be truthful. If EP in fact wasn't intending wearing the Street suit onstage then I wonder the reasons why: Did he get distracted and forgot to change his outfit in time? Maybe he was visiting with fans backstage or too busy chatting with guests/friends/family in his suite while resting before another concert could begun? (He performed the dinner concert the same night at 8:15pm and wore the Totem Pole suit for it); perhaps something happened with the other outfit he planned to change into for the second concert, considering he didn't want to wear the Totem Pole suit for both concerts the same night; or Elvis simply felt like wearing the Two-toned Street suit because he felt more comfortable in it at the moment. I guess we'll never know what actually happened.

UPDATE: I learned reason why he probably wasn't properly dressed for the August 19th concert. Thanks @deke-rivers-1957 for commenting on this post and sharing your knowledge on what was going on in Elvis' life in those days. I see I was only trying to be optimistic while guessing why Elvis wasn't properly dressed onstage in August 19, 1975 because it went through my mind it could be due to illness someway but I chose not to mention this possibility before. Thanks to you, we have an answer to share here. There you go:

Friday 15, in August 1975 "Late in the evening Elvis leaves Memphis for Las Vegas, very likely in the Jet Commander, but the place is forced to make an unscheduled stop in Dallas when Elvis has difficulty breathing. After resting for several hours in a motel, he recovers sufficiently to continue on the trip." Excerpt from book "Elvis Day by Day: The Definitive Record of His Life and Music" (1999) by Peter Guralnick and Ernst Jorgensen.

Using my words to finish the explanations, Elvis was visibly not okay since, at least, August 15, but all signals were ignored by him and the ones around him. On August 18, 1975 Elvis opened another engagement in Vegas, at the Las Vegas Hilton, but he was visibly still not in good shape. In the book, Ernst Jorgensen says "Elvis had to sit down for much of the performance". The 19th was the second concert night at the venue. Apparently, other than the "wrong suit" situation during the second concert that night, the shows ran smoothly — During the first concert that night, Elvis wore one of his proper performance outfits, the Totem Pole suit, as mentioned before. A possible reason why for the second concert he was dressed casually can be explained from what happened in August 20. On August 20, Elvis told his manager, Col. Parker, he wasn't feeling good enough to perform. Colonel Parker told him to perform that day again because "no prior notice had been given". After the concerts in August 20, the remainder of the shows at the Las Vegas Hilton for that season (it was suppose to be a two-week engagement) were "canceled due to illness". On the 21st, Elvis was back in Memphis and he was hospitalized at the Baptist Memorial Hospital.

The way I see it now with the accurate information, Elvis was trying to say he wasn't feeling okay and this suit was likely his way of showing he was ready to go home. It's only mentioned he was vocal about his illness on August 20th, but knowing this "Street suit" concert was the second that night on the 19th, Elvis was probably not intending to even perform a second concert when he wore his off-stage wardrobe during a performance that night. Maybe backstage he was trying to convince Parker to let him cancel the second show for the night and he didn't succeed in his attempt but it was too late to change his outfit for the show, or, perhaps, knowing a little of Elvis' personality, he was probably not dressed to perform just to piss Colonel Parker off, a way of showing his will needed to be respected and taken seriously.

I confess I really was trying not to imagine EP was sick during that concert, but that's the backstage story behind the "Two-toned Street Suit" worn onstage in 1975.

LET'S SEE THE KING IN ACTION WEARING THAT SUIT:

Elvis had several different colored "two-toned street suits". He wore them during 1975 and 1976. This was the only one which was worn on-stage. Excerpt from website elvisconcerts.com (Jumpsuit index)

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

VERSIONS OF THE TWO-TONED SUIT

About that, it's a part of Elvis's personality, as his friends told over the years, "when Elvis likes something, he goes all the way". From general off-work activities (going to the movies, amusement parks, riding motorcycles, collecting guns/police badges, and so on), to food and also to his wardrobe choices, Elvis overdid things when he liked something.

The King owned clothes in the same model in different colors, usually his favorites (blue, red, black and white). Below we have an example of this, before going to the Street Suit.

Two-toned Street Suit

EP had at least four of them: two are black and white with the variation between them being the reverse color scheme, another one goes in two shades of blue and a fourth suit goes in brown and beige tones.

The one he wore onstage is in the second picture below, this time worn casually, as usual. On the photos in both sides of that one, Elvis is wearing the reverse color scheme suit - same model but white with black side stripes and black lapel. On the latter pictures Elvis is wearing Two-toned Street suits in blue and another one in brown/beige tones.

Sometimes Elvis would wear the Two-tone suit jacket as a coat, over his actual stage wear:

The King wearing the Chicken Bone suit with the jacket of his blue shades "Two-Toned Street Suit" over his shoulders.

Elvis performing at the Hilton Hotel in Las Vegas, Nevada, on August 19, 1975 (Midnight concert).

Note: Those are only the pictures I could find of this one suit model Elvis had in different colors but it wouldn't surprise me if EP had more of them, which I imagine it would go in red-white or red-black color schemes or even all white/all black versions, but I haven't found pictures that can endorse this theory, so far.

[ghosty-schnibibit]

alright, so, now that i am not an incandescent ball of fury:

i was extremely disappointed with go2 and downright angry about the way it concluded. i've already read some excellent posts by other lovely people that articulate some of my grievances really well (which sadly i can't link here or the site will eat this post entirely) but i want to add my own to the pile. if you enjoyed the season then more power to you, but i very much did not.

after this post i won't be complaining about s2 again or really posting anything about it at all, positive or negative, and will probably just block the tag entirely. like i said in my much shorter vent post last night, i just want to get all of my negativity out in one go and then pretend it doesn't exist. with that out of the way:

the pacing was terrible. the plot went in circles around itself and the mystery was handled so poorly that it somehow managed to be too convoluted and too simple at the same time. we spent five entire episodes wondering what was going on only to have it resolved by an exposition dump of about five minutes. the mini-sodes ground multiple episodes to a halt and squandered the majority of the season's runtime on pointless fanservice that cheapened some of the previous season's most emotional moments, runtime that could have been better spent setting up the gabriel mystery or developing literally any of the new characters introduced. speaking of which,

the new characters were pointless. nina and maggie were given no characterization beyond being pale expies of az and crowley, and the fact that a substantial part of the b-plot revolved around them makes this even more apparent. i do not remember the name of the angel pretending to be a constable and i don't care enough about them to look it up, they had literally no plot significance whatsoever. same goes for the processing demon from the third episode. the flip with jax from being a somewhat neutral character to a big bad in a party city wig felt like a failed attempt to recapture some of what made hastur and ligur work in the previous series.

gabriel and beelzabub. their relationship was unbelievable and clashed so heavily with their previous characterizations. i called it from the first episode and dreaded its conclusion right up to the finale. they feel like an ill-thought parody of ineffable husbands pulled out of an enemies-to-lovers crackfic. every romantic moment in the last episode was insipid and cloying, and them getting a consequence free happy ending retroactively cheapened the stakes of the previous season. it honestly felt like the writers just wanted to mash their dolls together.

aziraphale's character was assassinated and crowley was basically just there to play the hits. both of them were flanderized to the moon and back, but poor aziraphale got the worst of it. all of his character development from the previous season was thrown out the window in order to give us the big angsty conclusion set-up for a third season. they were both utterly flattened and i feel so bad for michael and david, they were clearly doing the best with what they were given but what they were given was just plain bad.

most of the humor and warmth from the book and the previous season were just… gone. no narrator, only one or two comedic asides from the title cards, a total of maybe three minutes of queen music across the whole thing (and most of that a piano cover), and a whole lot of little stylistic touches that went by the wayside and left the world feeling a bit hollow. also the comedy in this season was much more reliant on a "hey, aren't the characters acting so silly right now? aren't they failing at looking/acting normal? isn't that funny?" style of humor than on the wit and subtle satire of the first.

it was nothing but set up for a third season. learning this after finishing the season did not make me feel better about any of it, but it does explain a bit why it felt like all set up and no pay off. i have zero confidence about the ship being righted in a potential s3 that we likely will not see for many years (if at all, i'm already hearing murmurs about the show getting axed).

so that's basically it. i'll reiterate that if you enjoyed this season then i have no beef with you; your opinions are your own and, while i have no desire to have a dialogue about them, i respect them. but the original good omens book was very personally meaningful to me, as was its adaptation in s1, and this poorly thought out continuation has disappointed and saddened me to the point that i feel like i don't want to engage with the fandom in its wake.

[puckpocketed]

18/01/2024 - SEA @ EDM

Tuna and his soft hands -> Dumo - clipped all the way back in January before I even knew how to make gifs. a bit of a season obit + thoughts about Tuna under the cut.

ooough this is gonna be very off the cuff and unedited so here goes!

this clip is from the oilers match that ended the kraken point streak. it was a strange, tense match. filled with penalties and scrums. this is where we lost Yanni to a charging major and 2 game suspension. as an aside: I don't think about players and their hits the same anymore after this. at the time, I was pretty much on the train of "well, he didn't hurt the guy", but since then I've done a lot of thinking. every player has thrown a questionable hit, or has the potential to - including all of my favourites. on principle: if a bad hit delivered by a random opposing player is wrong, that standard has to apply to my faves too. anyway. everyone was getting sick around this time, and if i remember correctly we lost a bunch of guys to illness during the pens match just days before this one. the vibes were high up until then, and it feels like we never really recovered. I know the season hasn't panned out the way we wanted since, but I still look back on those times so fondly.

a little breakdown of the clip:

there are two people bearing down on Tuna here. Darnell Nurse (#25) gives a pretty half-hearted effort after he realises Tuna isn't going to rim the puck along the boards. Tuna cuts into the middle - I wonder if he's looking for a cross ice pass to Ebs (#7) here? he stops pulls the puck in so so quickly - avoids the sweeping stick check from Evander Kane (#91), and shovels a backhand pass to Dumo from such an awkward angle that I'm baffled as to how he even did it. he opens himself up for a pass on the blue line after, which I'd have liked to see. but oh well!

thoughts on tuna which have been rolling around in my head like those lint balls in the dryer:

i'm always thinking about Tuna and the little things he does. he's one of the most interesting kraken (to ME). i don't like to play favourites but i have to admit that games just don't have the same shine when he's not in </3 I like that he holds on to the puck a little, I like that he's got good hands in tight spaces, I like that he shoots with accuracy over explosive power. I like that he has a tiny bit of grit to him. I like that he's opportunistic - what I noticed most about him was his habit of just... being in the right place at the right time. he'll probably never be one of those guys who can generate chances on his own unless he miraculously makes a late leap in development, but if there's a chance then he'll be there to finish on it.

he's a quiet player in terms of hype around the league. a journeyman, a depth acquisition. hot on the market when his contract is up, but rarely spoken of otherwise. I felt some kinda way when I saw him answer that question about staying with the kraken. he's been shuttled from team to team, seemingly unable to find a home for so long - and I know this is common, I know that's how this league works for the vast majority of players who aren't franchise altering superstars. whatever. it still hit me that he could simply leave, and this team would just be another team where he couldn't put roots down. there's an article from the 2010s naming him a 'core' player of the red wings, did you know? and since then, he's just bounced and bounced around. i know this league is a business, i know teams just need to do what they have to in order to win. I don't care. let him rest. let him find a home. god.

i've said this about my other teams too, but 23-24 kraken will always be special to me. my lovely losers who fought and stumbled and failed. my first wagon. my little cobbled together family of leftovers. this team won't ever be the same again and I'm trying to be okay with that - but to contradict myself... I hope Tuna stays with the kraken. yeah, okay he's just some guy, but to quote that one tumblr post: hes MY just some guy. i am woefully attached, and it's such a long shot but I hope he can be a part of this team growing and blossoming into something strong for the next couple of years. hockey gods if you are listening - I hope he retires a kraken.

failing that, maybe he goes to one of my other beloved teams in need of a solid middle 6 winger. shark girl summer? haha? <3

[cuddlepilefics]

SKZ Season Greetings - 3

First Snow

Considering how contagious this cold seemed to be if it could take out so many people in such a short time, Chan made sure the members all wore masks when they returned to check on their sick friends. He doubted the masks would actually keep them from falling ill but it was worth a try despite the congestion already having settled at the back of his sinuses. Minho too had been clearing his throat a lot during the last hour of their adjusted schedule, so Chan didn't have much hope for the group to stay healthy. There was simply no way their immune systems were in any shape to fight off infections with how overworked and rundown they all were. "I really hope Innie finally managed to get some sleep", Minho mumbled, running a hand through his hair. He had been the one to stay up with Jeongin for most of the previous night but no matter how tired he was, the image of their maknae crying because he just wanted to sleep but felt too awful to kept haunting him. Giving the dancer a reassuring smile, Chan hummed: "I'm sure him and Changbin are resting well. Don't worry too much." It was hard not to worry though and Chan wasn't as sure as he wanted the dancer to believe, yet there was nothing they could do but wait till they got home.

Making sure his mask was properly covering the lower half of his face, Minho unlocked the door to his dorm and let the members in. They had contemplated to split up the dorms differently to avoid contagion but the only two members who hadn't been overly exposed yet were Hyunjin and Felix, so they decided to just cross their fingers and hope for the best. At least, some of the stress eased when they found both Changbin and Jeongin asleep on the couch, so they took turns showering. Hyunjin and Jisung went back to their dorm to shower and promised they'd take a trip to the store to stock up on sick supplies in case their friends' cold would spread. Jisung had been incredibly quiet all day, which Chan wasn't too concerned about. Frequently having their schedule overthrown and rearranged at the last minute put all of them on edge, so it was no wonder that the rapper had started to withdraw. Minho had gone straight to the kitchen, smiling when he realized there was soup on the stove. He hoped their friends had actually eaten something but he doubted it since the pot was almost filled to the brim.

When Chan joined Minho in the kitchen, he found the dancer staring intently at a spot on the wall, clearing his throat. Minho was tightly gripping a glass of water as he tried to rid himself of the irritation in his throat. "You good?", Chan asked softly after Minho sipped some of the water. The dancer nodded, his voice slightly scratchy when he replied: "Yeah, dunno why my throat's so dry all of a sudden." – "Well, you spent a lot of time with Innie last night. Wouldn't be surprised if you were coming down with the same thing", Chan hummed, giving the other a long look to determine if he looked unwell at all. Shrugging, Minho reminded: "So did Seungmin in the late afternoon and you and Jisung spent a lot of time with Changbin. Are you feeling alright?" – "Honestly?", the leader whispered, avoiding his dongsaeng's eyes, "I don't know. My head and sinuses hurt and I feel pretty rundown. The latter could just be our busy schedules but.... It might all just be me imagining things because I know how likely it is that we caught it, so unless I start running a fever I will convince myself it's all just in my head." – "I get what you mean", Minho sighed, finishing the rest of his water, "Guess all of us will have to take it easy for the time being and try not to freak out too much."

To keep himself from freaking out and reading into the sensations within his body too much, Minho busied himself with making dinner. Cooking was a little like therapy to him and now that he had some time on his hands, it was easy to lose himself in the task. A hearty meal would surely cheer his anxious dongsaengs up, besides, their bodies could all use the nutrients to hopefully stay healthy. Felix had joined him at some point after taking a shower, not wanting to stay alone and grateful that his hyung allowed him to help. Seungmin had showered too at this point and was in his room, while Chan had set up his laptop at the dining table to get some more work done. Minho's head shot up when he heard a door being shut with more force than would've been necessary. Glancing towards the living room, he saw Jeongin alone and luckily still asleep. No sooner than the bathroom door was shut behind him, Changbin broke into a painful cough. Yeah, no wonder the maknae's ribs felt sore if he's been coughing like this all night.

"I'll go check on him", Chan sighed worriedly, fetching the rapper a glass of water before making his way to the bathroom. The leader's heart ached when he saw the tears in his friend's eyes. Setting down the glass on the sink, Chan patted Changbin's back and hummed: "That doesn't sound good." – "Innie's worse", the younger choked out, wiping his eyes as he tried to catch his breath. He gratefully accepted a drink and after clearing his throat a few times, he was able to stop coughing. "How have you been? Did you read my text?", Chan asked quietly as he took a seat on the edge of the tub. Washing his hands, Changbin splashed some cold water on his fever-flushed face before taking a seat on the closed toilet lid. Holding his head in his hands, the rapper admitted: "Didn't know you texted me. Slept for most of the day after we turned on a movie. The coughing only really started now and I finally get what Innie meant when he told me his ribs ached. Gosh, that was exhausting."

After Chan had updated Changbin on their situation, he walked the rapper back to the living room, smiling when Jeongin woke up for a moment and reached out his arms. Slipping under the blanket, Changbin pulled the maknae into a hug and looked at Chan expectantly when the oldest felt their dongsaeng's forehead. Chan's grimace was enough for Changbin to know that Jeongin was still incredibly feverish and the blankets probably weren't helping with that but he had been so cold earlier.

Felix and Seungmin had already started to lay the table, while Minho finished up preparing dinner, glancing at the clock. A smile spread on his lips when the front door opened and Hyunjin and Jisung shuffled into the dorm. Kicking off their shoes, they shook the snow out of their hair before setting their shopping bags down. "Woah, it's snowing?!", Felix gasped, dashing over to the window to take a look outside. Blowing into his frozen hands to warm them up, Jisung smiled: "Yeah, it just started while we were on our way back. Got cold quickly after the sun went down." – "Go wash your hands, so we can get a hot meal into you", Minho instructed as he saw his dongsaengs shiver, "We can unpack those bags later."

Jeongin had woken up from the commotion and sleepily sat up, rubbing his face into the blanket. "Hey there", Changbin whispered, tightening his arms around the maknae, "You feeling a little better after your nap?" The younger only shrugged, looking around the dorm and realizing their friends were back. While Minho went to check on Jeongin, Chan and Seungmin plated the food and already started to serve it. That was also when Chan realized that they wouldn't have had to put on masks because they'd have to remove them for their meal anyway. Suppressing a sigh, Chan accepted that there wasn't much they could do and that he'd only be able to deny the increasing headache for so long.

Though Changbin and Jeongin loved Minho's cooking, they decided to have some of the soup Changbin had made earlier as their throats felt too swollen to swallow anything solid. At that point, Jisung softly spoke up, awkwardly requesting: "Could I have some of that soup too?" – "Are you okay, Hannie?", Minho frowned worriedly as the younger stared down at his hands. Not daring to look up, the rapper nodded and whispered: "My throat's just been a little irritated all day and I'm not really hungry anyway, so...." – "Hang on", Chan frowned as he got up to grab the other a bowl, "Is that why you've been so quiet today?" – "Yeah, talking hurts a bit, so I tried to keep it down", Jisung mumbled, picking at his nails. Placing a bowl of soup in front of the rapper, Chan smiled sadly: "You could've told us you weren't feeling well, you know." – "I thought my mind was making it up and it wasn't too bad", the younger breathed, "It only really started to hurt when I breathed the cold air on our way back." Gently, ruffling Jisung's hair, Chan went back to his seat and instructed. "Go to bed early, yeah? It'll be a quiet evening anyway, so try resting before you start feeling worse."

Changbin had taken Jisung along to watch a movie with him and Jeongin after they had confirmed that he was running a fever too. When the others had cleared the table, Minho caught Chan swallowing a pill and raised his eyebrow at the leader. "The headache's only getting worse", the oldest admitted, finishing the rest of his drink. Biting his lip, Minho hummed: "You said unless you develop a fever you'll convince yourself it's nothing. I think now would be a good time to take your temperature because I don't like that glassy look in your eyes. Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if you caught it too. You don't look good." He didn't want to remind the Aussie that he probably had the worst immune system out of all of them from how much he often overworked himself and he didn't have to. Closing his eyes, Chan rested his forehead against the kitchen cabinet and sighed: "I guess. What about you? Your voice sounds hoarse." – "Throat's a little irritated but that's about it for now", Minho shrugged, giving his only hyung a crooked smile, "Go take your temperature and get some rest. We'll be fine. Even if all of us catch it, which is not all that unlikely, we'll be fine. Don't think too much." The older nodded before composing himself to go and take his temperature.

As Chan stared at the reading on the thermometer, there was no denying it any longer. Hyunjin and Felix were unloading the shopping bags onto the dining table when the leader returned, a frown etched on his face. "What's wrong, hyung? You look frustrated", Hyunjin asked with a small pout. Biting his lip, Chan sighed. "I am frustrated. Frustrated because I'm sick." – "Aww, no", Felix hummed sympathetically, "Maybe you wanna go join the rest of our sickies. I think they're about to start a movie and you usually like Disney movies." The leader visibly perked up at that and padded over to the living room. Having overheard their conversation, Jisung already poured his hyung a cup of tea and patted the spot next to him, ready to share his blanket with the older.

Hyunjin just finished up restocking the medicine cabinet in the bathroom when Seungmin joined him, a bundle of laundry under his arm. He had gathered Jeongin's sweaty bedsheets and started a wash load while Minho put fresh sheets on Jeongin's bed. The dancer also used the opportunity to slip into his own room and change his clothes. He had started to feel a little cold, especially after watching half of the group cuddle up together under multiple blankets. Glancing out the window and watching the tiny snowflakes drift to the ground, Minho decided it was time to wear his Christmas sweater. Despite their circumstances, he smiled a little as he made his way back to the common area.

Hyunjin and Felix had put everything away and were discussing Christmas decorations when Minho joined them in the kitchen. Stirring a large pot of hot chocolate, Felix turned to the older and asked: "If we'll all be out off work, which doesn't seem so unlikely with how many are sick already, do you think we could decorate the dorm this year, hyung? We've been too busy last year but I'd love the holiday aesthetic. If it bothers anyone, I can limit decorations to only my room but I think it'd be a lot more fun if we did the whole dorm." – "I don't mind if you want to decorate the rest of the dorm too", Minho shrugged pulling up a chair, so he could sit down while he watched his dongsaengs. "Neither do I", Seungmin piped in, returning from the bathroom, "And I highly doubt Innie does. If he wasn't feeling so bad, he'd probably insist on helping you decorate." – "Maybe wait till tomorrow though", Minho hummed and pulled his legs up to his chest, his voice a little scratchy, "I think Jisung's already asleep and it won't take long till Chan's out too, so we should let them sleep and I think decorating is more fun if you listen to the right music." Felix could only agree, thinking back to the Christmas playlist he had compiled over the past few weeks.

With Hyunjin's help, the Aussie started to transfer the hot chocolate into cups. Hyunjin walked off to bring Chan, Changbin and Jeongin theirs so their leader wouldn't miss out due to being asleep like Jisung. Minho gratefully wrapped his hands around the warm cup when Felix handed it to him, the warmth making him sleepy in his seat. He really wanted to join his friends for some cuddles and he doubted he had anything to lose because he already felt like he was coming down with something but as long as he wasn't confirmed sick, he should be a good role model and not 'risk it' on purpose. Thanking Felix for the drink, Minho retreated to his room to huddle under his blanket, ready to go to sleep as soon as his cup was empty. Seungmin too headed to his own room and settled into bed early, telling his friends goodnight. Realizing that almost everyone was asleep or seconds away from falling asleep, Felix pulled Hyunjin along to his room and th pair got comfortable on the Aussie's bed. While they sipped their hot chocolate, they discussed how they'd decorate the dorm in the morning before dozing off in each other's embrace.

[tadpolebrains]

are you writing the wyllstarion au that you talked about the concept for? just curious since i finished watching bridgerton s2 and am in the bridgerton pit too

You bet! Slowly and steadily XD

For asking, anon, have a preview (below the cut ^^)

The carriage is jittery on the roads, which doesn’t quite help the feeling in his stomach settle. It isn’t like Astarion hadn’t been to dozens of these kinds of events before- truly, he preferred the hoity-toity balls to most social gatherings since they were almost guaranteed to have wine somewhere- but he couldn’t help but feel ill at ease tonight.

He adjusted his cravat for the hundredth time, mostly just needing a way to occupy his hands. It was unbearably hot in the carriage regardless of whether he loosened it or not, despite the air still carrying the chill of winter. The only blessing at the moment was the fact that Cazador was riding in a separate carriage tonight, though he was still convinced the man would somehow be within earshot should he do anything untoward. It was why he remained silent despite his siblings’ hushed chatter beside him. Best not to risk it.

It was their first appearance in this city after moving here only days ago. Cazador would be watching them all like a hawk should anything go awry tonight, and it was inevitable that the man would find something to be displeased with. A smile out of place, or hells forbid he interact with the wrong people.

There was a list. A list of people to get on good terms with. Astarion practically had it burned into his skull with the amount of times he’d recited it.

At least tonight, most of the attention wouldn’t be on him. After all, it would be his sisters that Cazador paraded around for eligible bachelors. Astarion was just there to mingle. Study faces. Stand in dark corners.

And, of course, his major role of the night: to be the target of blame should any of Cazador’s plans stray from their meticulous steps.

Maybe he’d manage to get away with only one or two bruises after the festivities tonight.

Who was he kidding? This was going to be a ripe disaster.

He was momentarily caught off-guard by the carriage coming to a sudden stop, realizing they must have reached Wyrm’s Rock. He sighed, taking a deep inhale to brace himself for the shitshow the night would be, only plastering a smile onto his face as the carriage doors opened and they were let out. He offered a hand to help Aureila step down, straightening his posture as he spotted Cazador in his peripheral vision already, making his way towards them. Aureila was going to be Cazador’s fixation of the night, being the eldest of Astarion’s sisters, but of course, that cut Astarion no slack.

She did look quite nice, Cazador having had some servants fuss over her appearance for hours before. Dressed in the Szarr household colors, same as the rest of them, her gown was black in the bodice and faded into a deep red at the base. Gold detailing decorated the corset, matching the golden headdress in her hair and the rings around her horns. Her tail flicked in anticipation behind her as Cazador approached. It had hit Astarion about a dozen times during the ride.

“Remember what I told you, children. Backs straight, polite smiles, and don’t make a fool of me. Our success for the rest of the season rides on these next few hours. Don’t mess it up.” Cazador might as well have solely addressed him, seeing as Astarion was on the receiving end of that harsh glare while Cazador looped an arm through Aureila’s to begin walking her into the hall. Astarion simply smiled, biting back the harsh words of condescension he wished he could spit without suffering the consequences later.

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” He said, perhaps letting a little too much of that bitterness slip since Cazador’s eyes narrowed minutely. Luckily, being in public meant that he couldn’t exactly do anything about Astarion’s attitude without risking his precious reputation. So instead, Astarion was graced to the wonderful sight of his back as he led Aureila towards the ballroom.

The consequences would come later, though. They always did.

At least he could lose himself in wine and fancy fucking finger foods until then.

[hyenahunt]

Obbligato: Epilogue - 3

Writer: Akira

Season: Winter

Characters: Ibara, Tatsumi, HiMERU, Nagisa, Hiyori, Jun

Proofreading: Remi + 310mc (JP) & Skyress (ENG)

Translation: Peace & hyenahunt

Hiyori: Someone like Jun-kun grew up with such an embittered childhood, and yet he could be transformed into such a "warrior of love" — You are the very reason for that.

[Read on my blog for the best viewing experience with Oi~ssu ♪]

Ibara: Alright everyone, thank you so much for your patience! We've finished writing up a tidy little script, so please do give it a once over!

Tatsumi: Thank you. The truth is rather difficult to speak of, so a script is necessary.

Ibara: Isn't it just! Trust me, so long as everyone plays their part in my script as they should, then this shall be a resounding success!

HiMERU: —HiMERU can hear the cynicism dripping from your words.

Is everything all in the palm of your hand?

Ibara: A-ha-ha! ☆ It would be wonderful if everyone did as they were tasked this time around!

It isn't as if I have a grudge against any one of you either, after all!

I’d rather not hurt nor humiliate any of you right now. I won't gain a single thing in doing so.

HiMERU: —No, HiMERU doesn't think you meant any ill will by it.

Though you aren't kind either. Should you only treat others as if they were pieces on a board, HiMERU believes you will face severe retribution.

Ibara: I've already been facing that plenty, thank you very much!

I don’t know how you perceive me, but you should know that my plans have always gone astray somehow; there's always some snag or hitch that keeps it from going accordingly!

Just what am I doing wrong? I'd thought everything through, and yet it never went smoothly!

Oh, I should have never picked up His Excellency or His Highness in the first place! They're unmanageable!

Nagisa: ... Ibara, do I trouble you?

Ibara: I'm surprised you only ask so now! It feels as if I'm tossed and tugged around by you far too often in my memories, Your Excellency, especially as of late!

Nagisa: ... Sorry.

Ibara: Well, it isn’t something you need to concern yourself with. The benefits I've gained in working with everyone in Eden outweighs the headaches you've all given me.

Ibara: Rather, I'll simply account for whatever toil and trouble comes for the next scheme.

The same can be said about what happened at Reimei Academy. Though I failed to control everything and caused its ruin instead, so long as I don’t make the same mistake twice, I will remain as the Ibara Saegusa you are all familiar with.

Nagisa: ... It feels as if you're making the same mistakes as before, however.

Ibara: Don't interrupt me with needless remarks!

I worked behind the scenes of everything that happened at Reimei Academy, which kept me from having a good idea of the situation as it developed...

But no, not anymore. I have been involved with COMP from the very beginning, ensuring that I have complete control over the situation at any given moment for my own benefit.

Tatsumi: My, how greedy. Though perhaps I should be a little more so myself.

HiMERU: ... HiMERU does not wish to see you become similar to the Deputy Director, Tatsumi.

Hiyori: Fufu. Tatsumi-kun, you're never one to reject anyone, instead only ever accepting them for who they are. That is both your greatest quality, and your greatest flaw.

It’s because you accept and love just about everyone that everyone comes to love you.

But you know, each and every person has their limit, yes? If you try to accept beyond that limit, you'll only hit your breaking point and fall apart again.

Tatsumi: Thank you for the advice, Tomoe-san. I'll take it to heart.

Hiyori: No need to thank me. I'm terribly fond of you, as well.

Tatsumi: I don't believe we spoke to one another at school, though.

Hiyori: Ibara prepared a script in which I claim to have paid you visits at the hospital, befriended you from there and became fast friends, you see.

Though that's a beautiful and yet completely fabricated story with no basis in reality — I would truly like to befriend you all the same.

Hiyori: I've heard so much about you from Jun-kun. That's why long before I met you, you'd already earned my respect and love.

Hiyori: Jun-kun was a true menace with it, especially in the days when we first met. Any chance he got, he'd be going on about Tatsumi-senpai, Tatsumi-senpai, Tatsumi-senpai — why, I've heard about you ad nauseam.

Hiyori: ...You see, Jun-kun dearly regrets that he wasn't able to stop you from falling to ruin.

That in the time that the two of you grew apart to the point of rarely talking, you had been thrust into the very depths of despair. Jun-kun has grieved that, all this time.

Tatsumi: ......

Hiyori: That's why, even if it's not quite compensation for those regrets, he would risk even his own life to devote himself to me. So that he may put every effort into loving me, this time without looking the other way.

Hiyori: Someone like Jun-kun grew up with such an embittered childhood, and yet he could be transformed into such a "warrior of love" — You are the very reason for that. And so I've always thought that surely, you must be someone incredible.

Tatsumi: I don't believe I did anything in particular to influence Jun-san, though. Rather, all we did was drink tea and chat about trivial things with one another.

Hiyori: To Jun-kun, who lived in a waking hell, that must have been his one and only salvation.

You've had a greater impact beyond what you've always believed of yourself.

And Jun-kun is the very proof of that.

Jun: ......

Hiyori: Look at him now. How he'd detested the very thought of COMP, a plan intended to boost the image of the school that had tormented him so much with its system, and yet —

Jun: ......

Hiyori: He's reading the script in intent silence, and warming up so that he may boost the quality of his performance by even the slightest degree.

He’s such a diligent, earnest boy, don’t you think?

In order to perform as everyone wishes, he's pushed away his own misgivings. He strives to improve himself, all so that he may bring our fans even a single ounce more of delight.

Tatsumi: Yes, Jun-san certainly is splendid.

No matter how the world fell apart around him, he alone stayed the same.

Tatsumi: I should have reached out to him, rather than speak so patronizingly about what I thought I knew — I should have followed his example.

Tatsumi: I should have asked about his way of life and learned from it, so that I would be able to become even slightly better of a person than I was before; but it's far too late for such regrets.

I became an idol so that I could find a place to belong. A rather impure motivation, wouldn't you say?

Tatsumi: But Jun-san... More than I, more than anyone else, is walking that path with pure, genuine intentions.

I have a deep respect for him. Though he may have been scorned for being the son of a failure, I believe Jun-san must be the person who won most of all at Reimei Academy.

He is the only one who didn't lose a single thing. That is why even now he shines so brightly, glittering with all that he has gained.

Tatsumi: Ah, how envious I am.

[ ☆ ]

✦✦✦✦✦

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[oswlld]

oswlld's monthly wrap up: february

note: i am trying something a bit different this year, so bear with me as i figure out how i want to format this. i wanted to spend more time sharing what i consume, beyond what i rb, and put my thoughts in one place. these posts are okay to rb

--

The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo, Taylor Jenkins Reid [started 02/04, finished 02/13] I recall an article calling out TJR as one of many authors that are pro-israel and haven’t seen anything that disputes the claim. I don’t have much to contribute to the conversation anyways, so I’ll pass on leaving a review. — After Dark, Haruki Murakami [started 02/06, finished 02/21] What I admire about what Murakami accomplished with After Dark was achieving the right level of simplicity to bring out the tense undertones in the magical realism. I also really enjoyed being invited to float with the story, almost breaking a fourth wall and interacting with the spaces. 4⭐️ in storygraph. — When We Cease to Understand the World, Benjamín Labatut [started 02/24, still in prog] I am only about 50 pages in and I am already ill. Too early to form an opinion, thus I’ll offer a snippet of the book description: “A fictional examination of the lives of real-life scientists and thinkers whose discoveries resulted in moral consequences beyond their imagining. When We Cease to Understand the World is a book about the complicated links between scientific and mathematical discovery, madness, and destruction.” Feels very timely reading this at the same time as watching Three-Body and then Oppenheimer in the next week or so.

High on the Hog: How African American Cuisine Transformed America, Netflix [started: 02/02, finished 02/07] WOW!! Wowowowowow. Wow. This needs to be a mandatory watch, even though we are at the end of Black History Month. It’s a well curated journey through the slave era to present day, from shores of Africa to all areas of the US. It’s so empowering and inspiring. Don’t wait until June or next year, please educate yourselves and open your heart to this show. — African Folktales Reimagined, Netflix [started 02/02, finished 02/08] I heard about this show through an article posted on Short of the Week last year and immediately put it on my watchlist. What a wonderful choice of directors for this series. Such strong visionaries and visuals. My favorites out of the six stories were Enmity Djinn and MaMlambo. MaMlambo still has a chokehold on me. MAJOR trigger warnings for this series is under the cut. — Three-Body, Viki (also avail on YT) [started 02/19, paused on 02/26] Trigger warnings for this series is also under the cut. With that said, I have a very personal connection with Three-Body Problem, both the novel and the physics problem, so taking this show on has been my entire world. When it comes to tackling my watchlist, shows that have a substantial number of eps/seasons gets split into chunks, so that I can tackle them over a number of months. For this series, I divided the 30-epsiode series into three ten-episode parts that will take me from February to June. I’ll post an official review when I finish over the summer, but for now I will say I very much enjoy having my brain turn into goo after every ep. What an explosive first outing. I will be resuming this show in April for eps 11-20, where I’ll be reunited with my beloved war criminal.

Over the Moon, Netflix [watched on 2/10, DNF] So unfortunate that I started this and could not finish. I hope to get back into it in May, so I can talk about how beautiful it is. Gotta do it for Glen Keane. — Sky Ladder: The Art of Cai Guo-Qiang, Netflix [watched on 2/11] I…. I think I am going to let this quote from the film speak for me: “In the 60’s, when American astronauts landed on the moon, that was really good news, even in China. But I was sad because I thought I would never make it to space myself. But later on, I realized that art could be my space-time tunnel connecting me to the universe. If there was an opportunity, I would like to make a ladder into the clouds. But the purpose of this ladder wouldn’t be for me to go to space, it would be to encourage a back-and-forth, a dialogue.” I MEANN!!!! Yes, I did go into this film already aware of some of his works but I didn’t really know a lot about him. What I admired most was his joy and child-like wonder when he’s interacting with his art. I loved witnessing him act like he’s 7 yrs old again, especially in that air balloon scene. There’s also a moment when he’s become complacent in his projects, settling on the bare minimum to get a job done. When the art of creating is stripped of the art, what is left of Cai is very clear to the viewer: he is frustrated, he feels suffocated, he’s used. Alternately, towards the end of the film, he brings it back with “Yes, a lot of artists do things that are too commercial. It lacks some compulsive and sincere emotion that should exist in all art. Collaborating with [unknown artists] will always remind me of the pleasure I felt and my original purpose for doing art.” (Fascinating to compare his turmoil with the govt whilst working with Netflix.) All in all, this film did a great job telling a story about the magic in enduring passion projects over time. In this case, his Sky Ladder being a fourth attempt at a impossibly large scale dream project. I feel like my thoughts are all over the place with this film, but I’m still finding new things that really speak to me as an artist. — Your Name Engraved Herein, Netflix [watched on 2/18] I thought I had this gifset on my blog but it turns out I may have just DM’d @forcebook about this and didn’t rb, but anyways I saw this and thought hey this has the potential to ruin me lemme put it on my watchlist. And now over a year later, I finally got around to it. Well… it’s exactly what I ordered, it definitely ruined me. I mean, when they come at me with “Maybe more people would understand me in hell. Make it easy for me and help me go to hell,” what else am I supposed to be but ruined. I want a sequel, I need their reset.

There are more to add to the movies category, due to Oscar season, but I’ll save them for a separate post, with all my thoughts on the films/shorts I was able to catch, for Oscar weekend.

Ella Sings Gershwin, Ella Fitzgerald with Ellis Larkins at the piano [first time listening] One hobby I picked up during the pandemic was growing my vinyl collection. I found this vinyl in 2022 with the intention of finding more from this era/genre. Not much movement since then, since vinyl purchases only happens once or twice a year. Suffice to say, I am so happy that the quality is still in tact and it makes me want to get back into vinyls soon. Current top 3: My One and Only (What Am I Gonna Do), But Not For Me, and Soon — Wicked [relistening] One thing you need to understand about me is that Wicked was my first musical hyperfixation. I used to spend summers on the train to the city to catch the raffle drawings and when my name was picked, it would be the best $25 well spent to be seated front row. And when I was not in the city, the CD would be on repeat in the car on my long drives going to and from home and college. My introduction to YT was watching all of the bootleg clips of every casting. All the Eden Espenozas and Stephanie J Blocks and Kerry Ellis’. All the Kendra Kassenbaums, Megan Hiltys, and Annaleigh Ashfords. And yes, all the Aaron Tveits don’t look at me. I’ve seen almost all facets of this show enough times to start frankenstein-ing together my version of Wicked. All this to say that my love for this show remained dormant for over a decade, until the movie trailer for part one came out. And then *SPLASH* I immediately jump in head first into a slime tutorial just like that. Long ago, I watched Kara Lindsay’s broadway vlogs without having seen her Galinda and now I can say I have seen the light, she’s just as immaculate as I imagined she’d be.

Welcome to Night Vale [recurring/catching up] I typically catch up on this podcast seasonally, since I find that this show is more enjoyable when I binge it. This time around, I have fallen more behind and needed to catch up on 11 episodes. My favorite eps: A Car Crash on Buellton Avenue (Ep 232), Sister Cities: Vermillion Falls (Ep 239), and He is Holding a Knife (Ep 240). I will admit that there was a period of time, maybe four or five years ago, when I dropped the show for reasons I cannot recall now but I am glad that I stuck around.

And now here are some tw to keep in mind:

AFRICAN FOLKTALES trigger warnings: domestic violence/abuse, child abuse, attempt(s) of suicide, drowning, and miscarriage.

THREE-BODY trigger warnings: The plot centers around solving the mystery behind scientists committing suicide on an international scale. Scenes ranging from allusions, thoughts of suicide, to moderate depictions of suicide.

[grimxark]

Ok. Part 3 earthspark was so incredibly disappointing. I feel so sad about it because it’s such a promising show.

I kind of ranted abt this to my friend for like an hour as soon as we finished watching but here’s some of my criticism which I may add on to. Or not

Warning for Earthspark s1 p3 spoilers and overall negativity. So sorry!

1. The writing of this part was sooo terrible. So many plotholes so much drama and so much cringe dialogue. I want to give it slack for being a children’s show but! There’s so much here that’s just senseless. I can excuse cringe dialogue but some of it is back to back to back. Like holy shit

2. Hate what they did to Karen. She was this malevolent evil that was being hinted and teased since part 1 and she amounted to literally nothing. She had no motives other than being racist, none that we know of. Maybe her parents died idfc but there are no real motives that she ever makes outright known. And she was being hinted to being this final boss type. Her death had no impact. It felt like a “oh look this is a child’s show turned dark”. Her death promised everything and it delivered nothing.

3. The last 3? Episodes where Twitch take charge feel apocalyptic and it was nice. Twitch and her older sister curse. The last one standing. The one bearing the weight of the family, having all that responsibility because wether you want it or not she is the older sister of the group. She watches everyone she loves simply disappear. She goes through so much trouble and so many plans and then thrash dies protecting her (which doesn’t make sense?? ill go onto this later). So, after she goes through all that trouble, the humans wake up and fix everything in the blink of an eye. and it undoes all this effort and character thrown into Twitch because she isnt the one who finds a way to fix it. it makes the last 3 episodes totally meaningless.

4. how would Thrash's body protect her from the blast. they were closest, and none of the others were protected the same way despite being in close proximity. why did the terrans even get affected by the blast? theyre not energon based. its like, the main plot of the show.

5. mandroid coming in and being like "interesting! for you ive been gone for a day, but under my calculations ive been gone… a year." was funny as hell. why a year?? why not one hundred. or at least fifty. as a lone human he would NOT have been able to convince the sharkticons in a year. and against the quintessons? and all those bodily changes? its so funny how stupidly underwhelming that time is.

6. Robbie's death was stupid. he does a green lantern oath and power up then still loses against megatron (bc its megatron) and then dies and gets revived. theres no shock, you know hell come back. i hoped everyone going "somethings wrong" meant we were going to get a "he died and came back wrong" ordeal but i guess i was expecting too much. also wasnt he dying in one episode. he said "its getting worse" and then he was fine

7. this entire part feels sooo odd to me with the inconsistencies, i wonder if the writers strike has anything to do with it. it almost feels so random. like on the same episode where robbie dies— why were they like "is that the real megatron?" while being scared as if they dont know megatron as a good guy. why would you be scared its the real megatron.

8. final fight felt so rushed. this whole part felt rushed. i wonder if there were budget cuts or if they used their whole budget on the first half of the season.

9. ill say it. maybe you don’t agree with me but. So much of it feels like fanservice. The starscream episode… why would Hashtag be the one to relate to Screamer? Mind control isn’t quite the same as constant abuse. And the entire episode relied a lot on watchers knowing what that relationship was like. In knowing what Starscream and Megatron are like. If you don’t know anything, it just feels odd. Even as a g1 inspired show, where Starscream and Megatron are awful to each other in damn near equal measures. It was a nice episode, I really enjoyed it, but there should’ve been more build up to that.

10. So many of the deleted scenes provide an extra feeling that was missing from the show. I’m really sad at how much potential this show has and how the entirety of parts 1 and 2 were amazing and built up so much and part 3 was just a huge let down with so many inconsistencies and questions left unanswered right after being brought up.

11.

[powderblueblood]

I am yet to finish season three, just five more episodes to go but please tell me your thoughts on the season. I feel so bad for my girl claire bear. she's the sweetest

okay but do you promise me to save this until after you’re done the season okay I’m taking it that you’re promising me wonderful okay

I am having such an on the One Hand but then on the Other Reaction to the third season

admittedly I did possibly the worst thing you could do for this season of the bear in particular and binged it (badum tssss) and didn’t let it digest properly (BADUM TSSSSS because. Food) when I think I should have paced myself out to maybe watch a couple episodes a week. Now That Said, we live in a hell era where the binging model is king so what are u gonna do

Now That Said, That Said I truly do believe this season was crafted as an exercise in testing patience, it’s challenging you to engage especially from the first episode and subsequent bottle episodes that are a lot of long scenes of dialogue/almost silent montages/single set pieces. I think it’s presented as a mirror to the sluggishness that everyone working at the bear is experiencing as a direct result of Carmy being the worst boss of all time ever

That Said That Said That Said, as much as I love a longggggg dialogue filled scene (the Cassavetes/Altman/mumblecore effect) I found a lot of the dialogue to be… erring on the side of corny I would say? Toeing into “uuuh so THAT just happened” territory, where the fuck yous weren’t sewn in with the same fluidity as the earlier seasons. It sounded a little bit like a MadTV sketch of the bear at times. I don’t think there was intention in that, I think they just lost the run of who these characters were really set up to be from season two at times, save for Carmy

Why are they blue balling us the way they’re writing Claire bear???? There are shimmers of great characterisation then the next scene she’s reduced giving to Dead Wife In Flashback Energy. Molly Gordon deserves better aka to fuck Sydney and I wholeheartedly believe that

There was also absolutely no reason for that many Faks. That stunt casting felt try hard. They had their one great stunt casting streak in season two and they should have left it there. Too many Faks ruin the whatever the fuck it is they’re making in that fuckass kitchen

I also adore and fully support the widely shared take of “if my favourite sandwich shop turned into a hundred-buck-a-plate gourmet joint because some white man with an inferiority complex and undiagnosed mental illness moved back home, I’d throw a brick through the window” because guess what Richie had a point about pushing out the working man, especially with the cost of living skyrocketing

Carmen berzatto poster boy for gentrification? MAYBE!!!!!!

How many of Cicero’s ulcers do you think he’s responsible for

[jiamiuxin]

to your eternity review (anime spoilers!)

i just finished season 2 and wow. just wow

i feel like my initial thoughts about it were "pleasantly surprised" because it took a turn i didn't expect it to. at first i thought it going to be like a collection of short stories about the human experience as fushi collects more vessels. i was really happy that there was an overall story instead. i lowkey had to let it cook but regardless i'd still enjoyed it that way

i greatly appreciate the anime built fushi from the bottom up. remembering when he was just joann the wolf at the beginning who couldn't speak and just wandered the world after march died is crazy comparing him to after the battle at renril

i really just have endless praise for this anime. not hypersexual, has action, emotional, good ensemble, unique story. the pacing is overall good too. i think it's one of the few anime i'd genuinely feel comfortable recommending to non-anime watchers; it's not too over-the-top in any way but i think it still retains the anime charm

if i had to be nitpicky i got frustrated with fushi a few times. fool me once shame on u fool me twice shame on me type kinda thing. wah wah wah "fushi is basically 5 years old" like yeah he's inexperienced like a 5 y/o in some aspects but he can articulate and learn beyond a 5 y/o. fushi did some bs later on in the story when it had been like either decades or centuries and i was like yeah yall silent on this now huh. but im overall pleased with how he is by the end of season 2. feels crazy to even try to compare him to the beginning

a little analysis/commentary

parts of the humanity fushi experienced:

emotions

i think he experienced grief, pain, and anxiety the most

followed by depression and pressure (despair)

but hand in hand with joy and hope

desire to protect

disappointment, betrayal, frustration

as of season 2, he is learning romantic love

lifestyle

eating at the dinner table with loved ones

friendship

parent-child (booze man and pioran)

child-parent (march) ((even tho she's his mama technically LMFAO))

siblings (march and parona, gugu)

advancement of human civilization

religion

politics

i think the aspect that had the biggest impact on me is how fushi questions "why?"

why do people act this way? why are we here? why do things happen the way they do? this leads me into thinking about how things aren't always black and white; perhaps kahaku could be good to explain this? as a viewer, i generally liked kahaku, but no doubt his nokker was really annoying and troublesome to deal with, making him a gray area "good and bad" character. same with bon and how he initially only wanted to use fushi to become king. but in the end, they redeemed themselves. i dont know, but i also find myself thinking about when it comes to applying morals irl, there are always exceptions--probably more exceptions than situations that do follow our rules. but when is it considered "enough is enough"? is it right for some people to take a beating just so someone else can have character development?

rest of my thoughts (jumbled)

fushi kinda reminded me of jesus. in that he was kinda there to "save" or protect everyone and how he was immortal [and on the third day jesus rose again]

the church of bennett was eye twitch for me bc of the hypocrisy and it was a lil too real to irl bc even tho it wasn't tho it was an obvious ploy it wasnt an in ur face type thing. like it wasn't a major plot thing but it j mirrored irl too well LOL

i felt really bad for arctic king (nameless boy) in the beginning bc ik damn well if it was me i'd go insane after 5 years of being alone--or maybe he was lowkey mentally ill? optimism or denial? both?

the reunion was really heartwarming but when it's first revealed that the spirits follow fushi i couldn't help but wonder what the others who decided to move on thought of fushi

i hate that bitch hayase

the time jumps were kinda crazy but i was still there for it; besides someone said for an immortal being like fushi a century is nothing

every time the beholder spoke i was like o g a t a (golden kamuy)

[tansyuduri]

OKAY HERE WE GO

First the Shameless self Promotion "Our Stars Still Shine Together" is the first writen of a series of fics. I have it's has a prequel coming out in august/september and a sequel coming out eventually. (Aka when I can get it betaed and get some critical feedback)

These three take place in an Arthur-returned world. (Aka he returns at the beginning of the prequal) By this one they are in an established relationship "Arthur has returned. He and Merlin have gotten together, and together they saved the world with almost no one the wiser. They think their job is done, but as magic is revealed to be re-emerging, and not all of it in the right hands, they must build a new Camelot in this modern world to deal with the emerging threats. Meanwhile, the trauma Merlin brushed aside for centuries, even after Arthur’s return, will not be ignored anymore."

Treat Me warmly was a prompt that had ended up turning into a Season 3 Au The second fic in this series I aim to release for Whumptober

"Arthur and Merlin have been pining for each other for a while now. Trapped in a remote hunting cabin by a storm, Merlin and Arthur's hidden feelings for each other are finally revealed.

Now Merlin must push past his fear and reveal his magic to the man he loves. How will Arthur react?

And what if the storm is more than it seems?"

NOW.

@aeonthedimensionalgirl's whump fics are really good.

@regulusrules has this beautiful way of writing that you have to fall in love with Here is the latest one!

"

In desperation to heal Arthur after Camlann, Merlin takes him to the Crystal Cave. He succeeds, yet with that destinies change, and their Golden Age comes true but with a cruel twist to their tale.

A twist that involves Arthur stabbing Merlin in his heart metaphorically, and Merlin doing the same but literally."

I recently also discovered this One writers'sd Au Modern Merlin world where Merlin had massive heath issues resulting in them writing HIGHLY realistic Whump/Hurt-Comfort. Because they had a special interst in modern emergency medicine. I want to again Emphasis THIS IS HIGHLY REALISTIC to the point where I've never seen anything like it. And they can make things get REALLY bad because modern medicine in the AU And Merlin health issues. Fics in this world are This one And this one "When Merlin's blood sugar levels drop during an important meeting, he has to decide whether to risk the wrath of his boss, Uther Pendragon, by leaving early or sit tight and hope for the best."

"With a number of serious health conditions, Arthur is used to Merlin being ill and ending up in hospital. But when Merlin's health takes a turn for the worse, Arthur is forced to face the possibility that this time, Merlin might not recover."

I really wish they would come back and write more, the second one is not finished but close enough to have a resolution I could handle. I enjoyed the Problum with Power

And the only rules that apply to rulors

There are plenty of WONDERFUL fics I am forgeting here! I'm kinda slow to read fanfiction.

guys can you please share your fav merthur fic???

okay, so my absolute fav fic is white knights by LadyAJ_13 on AO3. I have a brainrot for protective Arthur and this fic owns my heart. And i would really like to see which works are your favorite!!!

[astaroth1357]

Demigod MC Series: Demeter

Have I been using this series to vicariously punish Belphie for the events of Season 1? I cannot confirm nor deny that statement.

Demigod MC Series: Intro, Aphrodite, Hermes, Hades, Dionysus, Demeter

Lucifer

Didn't think too much of the "human" when they popped out of the portal. Sure they had a straw hat and a huge basket full of produce but it wasn’t like they were… Wait… No… Were they…?

Oh no. Oh nonononono, this is not good…!!

Demeter is notoriously doting and protective of her children (see her freakout and breakdown after Hades abducted of Persephone as proof) and they've pretty much done the EXACT. SAME. THING. here!!

It was a mad scramble by him and Diavolo to contact and appease their godly Mother Bear before she came roaring down to Devildom herself to turn them all into barley. Thankfully, Zeus must have intervened at some point because though she was indeed PISSED, she didn't threaten to barge in… yet.

She made one thing very clear. Bend so much as a single hair on her precious child's head and there would be WAR…

The MC received a 24 hour security detail after that. Just Mammon wasn't going to cut it, he needed NO chances. It was a full rotation of Mammon, him and Beel for the entirety of their stay (Asmo and Levi both threw hissy fits at the prospect of babysitting, Satan couldn’t be trusted not to kill them just to irritate him, and Belphie was out for… obvious reasons).

In some ways, it wasn’t so bad. The MC was a very mild sort of person, rather even tempered. He’d dare say they were pleasant, mostly content to just tend to their gardens and be out in the moonlight…

But the problem was, he just could not convince them to stay OUT of nature. Including the forests, which were full of hellish beasts fully intent on gnawing their flesh from their bones… and their specialty was plants, not animals, sooo…

Their habit of sneaking out to wander the woods got so bad that he very nearly considered pulling a Belphie 2 and locking them in the basement for their own good. But Devil knows what damage their mother would do if she found out…

At least they make for pleasant company… And Diavolo seems to like them quite a bit himself so the mortal gets a pass from him. Now if they’d only consider their own safety for a change…

Mammon

They make him a KILLING.

Like, no seriously. Their produce is insane!! He’s never tasted food so good, especially stuff that’s come fresh from the ground! It only took a few berries for Mammon to throw on a straw hat himself and start harvesting! He’s a farmer now, baby!!

Weeellll not quite. He’s still absolutely only in it for the money, but anything he brings to a farmer’s market goes so fast that he can hardly care about the labor! He’s never made this much Grimm in his life!! And it’s totally legit for a change!

He bought himself another car, paid off half of his debt, and even got Levi back that 2 or 3 grand he leant him centuries ago. Really, Mammon’s living his best life and it’s all thanks to MC!

It’s a good thing his blatant grifting doesn’t hurt his relationship with them at all, in fact they seem to enjoy having his help regardless. They bring him drinks on hot days or invite him on picnics and stuff, it’s… it’s really sweet. They’re very nice to him and he appreciates it…

But… COULD YA JUST STAY PUT ALREADY???

It drives him INSANE that they won’t stay out of dangerous places!! After he started caring about them for more than just a meal ticket it only got even worse!!

He’s not usually one for monitoring someone’s every move (that kind of control freak behavior is more a Lucifer thing) but he eventually had to set up familiars around the House just to keep them from sneaking out at night...

What was so interesting out there anyway?? There wasn’t any kind of plant that he could bring them himself! They didn’t have any need to be out there!! 

They’d keep telling him they’d be fine but it’s not like he’s going to actually buy that. They were too… nice to be dangerous or anything so why would he believe them?

No more running off, MC! Please, he’s beggin’ ya!!

Leviathan 

Wait, gardening? Like, being outdoors and stuff? Ew. No thanks, he’ll pass.

That was more or less his first reaction when they showed up and it never really got much better than that…

He admits that they’re friendly and it’s not like he dislikes them or anything, but their thing so far from his thing that they just don’t have a lot in common… you know?

For starters, they get So. Antsy. when they’re inside for too long! He tried to invite them to a marathon once, but they could hardly keep still and kept looking around like they were searching for a window… He said, “to jump out of.” They insisted just for some fresh air, but he didn’t buy it...

They’re nice enough to listen to his rants, but they’re barely ever inside for him to do so and like HELL is he going to leave his room and stand around out there for that long. Ranting is at least a one to two hour engagement! What if he gets hot out there? And have you SEEN Devildom bees?? Hell no!!

He has, however, asked them on multiple occasions to reproduce flowers he’s seen in different anime, especially ones that have a very unique look and they’ve done some real wonders with that!

He can now claim to be the only person to ever own a Ruby-Jade Vine plant, straight from the pages of TSL when it was used to brew tea for the Lord of Lechery during his brief illness and-is anyone even still listening anymore?

The point is, it’s a flower so rare it was imaginary but now HE has it!... or had it for about a week until his utter incompetence of all things plant killed it…

He begged the MC for another but they were out of the plants they needed to make it and would have to go back to the human world to find more… He’s still mourning his loss… Poor Henry 4.0…

Satan

Well… He’s called this MC “salt of the Earth” and he does truly mean it. Take of that what you will.

He doesn’t get much in the way of intellectual conversation out of this mortal UNLESS he’s talking about plants, farming, or botany… Interesting topics and complex in their own right to be sure, but that’s pretty much their wheelhouse and they like it there.

That being said, the feats that they can perform are genuinely mind-blowing! They are the ONLY person he has ever met who can cultivate the Devildom’s own ultra-rare Phantom Orchid, a plant only blooms when it reaches a perfect state of undeath (i.e. both taken care of and neglected just enough so that it's only barely alive. The balance is so tricky to master that one hasn’t bloomed down there for centuries!)

There’s also something just genuinely relaxing about watching them work or helping them in the gardens… More so than he’d ever expected from such a simple activity.

He admits that he’s taken quite a few strolls through the flower-filled courtyard of the Demon Lord’s Castle just to admire its beauty... But anything that they can grow just blows all of that out of the water!

They even taught him several magic botanical techniques so now he can grow some pretty mad plants himself. Lucifer never expected to find that giant Venus Flytrap in his closet, but one was there regardless. 😏

Just… out of curiosity one day, he asked the MC if they could make him a new kind of catnip. Not for any nefarious reason! You know… just for research purposes…

The nip they made was so effective that the House grounds were FILLED with nipped-up cats for a whole month! He was in Heaven!! (and Lucifer practically wiped those plants from existence so he couldn’t get any more… asshole...)

That must have inspired them because they apparently made a demons-only version that they told him about WELL after the fact. Had he known, he probably would have burned the stuff on principle... Do you know how dangerous demon-nip could be to them? Experiment responsibly, MC!

Asmodeus 

Ehhhh, gardening SOUNDS like one of those things that should be super Devilgram-able, but then you realize how sweaty and dirty you get in the process and it’s a huge turn off… Sorry MC.

When they first came down to the Devildom, he thought two things: 1) Such a sweet little flower child, as adorable as they were, would never survive; and 2) even if they could, he would never ever see eye-to-eye with them on the “wonders” of getting all up in the dirt.

Well, he was right about 2, but certainly not 1. Personally, he thinks his brothers worry about them too much, they ARE still a demigod.

At one point he saw a pack of hellhounds almost trample one of their vegetable gardens and they lost it. Word to the wise, never try to take on a child of Demeter in their own garden. Those hounds were wrapped up in rose vines before they could even yelp...

Yeah, the MC would be fine.

That being said, while everybody else clamors over their produce, he thinks that their flowers are really where it’s at!

Taking just five minutes in one of their gardens is something else... He’s never seen blossoms as healthy and immaculate in all the Devildom before! Their beauty could (almost) rivals his own! What they do isn’t just a hobby, it’s an art.

He’s taken multiple pictures with their blossoms and they go viral every time. It’s so rare to actually see gorgeous, petal-filled flowers in the Devildom, most of the native plants are of the man-eating variety.

His only complaint about this MC is that they seem to feel much more at home in work clothes and dirt than they do in any sort of party-look he tries to give them… Cute as they are, they can afford to gussy up sometimes can’t they? Mud and grass stains don’t make for a good look, sorry.

Beelzebub 

Beel gardens and the MC gardens as well. Add on that they seem to be able to grow all manner of fruits and veggies and he likes this one. A lot.

They had just finished apple-picking when the portal nabbed them so they had a massive basket of apples at the time. Naturally, Beel more or less stole the thing on sight, but the apples inside were so juicy and good that he almost shook them down for more on the spot!

Imagine his surprise when they, half pleadingly, explained to him that if he got them some seeds they could just grow more… and it wouldn’t even take that long.

To be clear, the formula he saw was this: Get seeds > bring seeds to mortal > mortal grows seeds > mortal makes endless supply of food….

Congratulations MC, you’ve now earned the sixthborn’s eternal loyalty after a grand total of… two minutes. He didn’t even know their name, but he was willing to take a bullet for them (provided he got more of those apples).

The next several months were spent with Beel attached to them to the hip in some way, but honestly? It was just so wholesome anyway…

If he’s helping in the garden, he never complains. He does most of the heavy lifting and actually likes being out there with them (unlike others...)

Many afternoons were spent sitting under fruit trees and talking. Sometimes, they go to the trouble of preparing a picnic or something but it would always inevitably end with Beel plucking the whole tree clean of whatever ripe (or unripe) fruit he can get his hands on with a smile. 

The MC never minded though. That’s just another excuse to grow more, right?

His only problem was when the MC would sneak out to the forest… especially when they get too antsy and just go alone. 

He HATES it when they do that! How is he supposed to keep them safe if they just wander off?? He knows that they have a special connection to nature and all, but it isn’t safe…

He’s flown in and scooped them back up to the House on numerous occasions and his “talking tos” get sterner after every rescue... Please stay put, MC! He’d have so many reasons to be sad if you were eaten… 😔

Belphegor 

Okay, he was looking for a capable, if not gullible, human. Not a shoeless flower hippy!

He honestly wasn't expecting much out of this one... Damn their little heart because they did genuinely believed his lies, it’s just that they weren't… well… They were really good at gardening.

… And it grew kind of hard to keep hating them whenever they'd show up just to give him fresh berries or a bouquet to see him smile… He may claim that his heart is made of nightmares and orphan tears, but who doesn’t enjoy being given a batch of flowers? 

Damn their sweetness too… Right to here.

When it came time to kill them he had a heavier heart than he thought he would, but kind of saw it like putting down the sacrificial lamb. Gotta be done to reach better goals... Stiff upper lip and all that.

Unfortunately for him, they had taken to carrying packets of demon-nip with them as a self-defense measure…

He wasn’t exactly sure what he expected when they shouted “Get nipped!” at him mid-attack, but it wasn’t a face full of some smelly herb! Like, really smelly…! Actually, that smelt kind of good… Hold on.

Turns out murderous rage really doesn’t last long after you get what is effectively ultra-strong catnip thrown in your face. They ended up having to go and tell Lucifer what happened themselves because Belphie was way too blissed out on the floor to do anything... They were legitimately worried they might have fried his brain...

He’s told the effects of the demon-nip lasted three days. He doesn’t know, because he hardly remembers any of it... They described him as like he was high on “weed” and “ecstasy” at the same time but he doesn’t know what either of those are either so it wasn’t helpful…

Truthfully, they were so nice to him while he was recovering that he couldn’t even be mad afterwards so all's well that ends well? Either way, he’s sleeping under their orchard trees from now on. It’s peaceful out there...

They burnt all that nip though. It’s some strong stuff...

[queenshelby]

My Friend’s Father (Part Five)

Pairing: Cillian Murphy x Reader

Warning: Age Gap, Mild Sexual References

Words: 1,848

Notes:

I have decided to make this into a series.

Alright, no judgment. This was a dream of mine and I felt like I had to write it down. Everyone in this Fic is over the age of 18 and this Fic is in no way based on Cillian’s real family life. It’s pure filth.

 *************************

YOUR POV

Two weeks had passed since you visited your friend Denise in Dublin and it was time for the annual Galway Arts Festival.

Denise had been working on a photography project for the past year and had been nominated for a student award in Galway as part of which ten of her photographs were being displayed during the Arts Festival.

Whilst, as you had expected, Cillian didn’t contact you, you knew that he would be there to support his daughter. Being an artist himself, he was very proud of her and her work and he supported her projects not only mentally but also financially with the caveat that she would finish her degree at Trinity College.

Unlike him, he didn’t want her to drop out of university even though she hated it and you certainly understood his reasoning.

Contrary to Denise, you had no creative bone in your body. You enjoyed art and theatre, but weren’t an artist or performer yourself. Instead, you were an A Grade Law Student who had become rather bored in Galway and had recently applied for a scholarship to Oxford University.

Reading was your passion and you had always been known as a geek. In school, you were the girl that no one liked, nerdy, not interested in fashion or social media and wearing braces, which, luckily, had been removed three years ago.

You were shy and it was only for Denise that you came out of your shell. She was popular in school, mostly due to her name, but also because she was generally confident and, over the years, she helped you gain confidence especially after you had left high school.

But, today, you knew you would be questioning your gained confidence once again since, first of all, you would be seeing Cillian again and the truth was that you couldn’t stop thinking about him in an intimate way and, secondly, you were featured completely naked on some of Denise’s photographs.

Whilst the photographs were artistic and not sexual in any way and your most intimate part wasn’t visible on them, it bothered you knowing that people you disliked would see you so vulnerable and you couldn’t remember why you had agreed to being photographed like that.

The other woman who Denise chose to photograph was Amalie. She was 23 and had been Denise’s friend for a while as well but, unlike you, she began modelling professionally when she was just 16. You all went to the same private school together and, clearly, her lifestyle had been largely financed by her parents. She always wore expensive clothes and had no interest in pursuing a career other than modelling, which barely sustained her lifestyle considering the few small jobs she got.

***

Just as you served your last cup of coffee to an elderly lady sitting in the corner of the café you were working at, you saw Denise, Amalie and two other friends of Denise walk in.

‘Hey guys, take a seat. I will be right with you. I am just about to finish my shift’ you said as you hung up your apron.

‘Please tell me you will get changed before the Gallery opening tonight?’ Amalie asked somewhat weirdly and you couldn’t help but roll your eyes as you sat down at the table with her, Denise and the others before ordering some coffees for yourselves.

‘No, I thought I would go like this’ you said sarcastically, looking down at your coffee-stained clothes.

‘I bought a dress for tonight’ you then said, after Amalie didn’t seem to sense your sarcasm.

‘Right’ she then said as she flicked through Instagram and you simply looked at Denise who shrug her shoulders.

‘What are you looking for?’ you asked curiously as her eyes seemed to be glued to her phone.

‘She is looking to find more photos of my dad and Laura Jennings’ Denise said, rolling her eyes.

‘Laura Jennings, as in the actress?’ you asked, causing Amalie to nod.

‘Yes, apparently they have been dating’ Amalie then confirmed, causing you to swallow harshly. You knew that you shouldn’t care but you couldn’t help it. Knowing that Cillian was seeing someone made you feel ill.  

‘And you care about that why?’ you then asked Amalie after an uncomfortable shiver ran down your spine.

‘Apparently, just like you, Amalie thinks my dad is a DILF’ Denise huffed out before telling you how disgusting you all were.

‘Well, he is though…he is super hot’ Amalie then joked before carrying on. ‘And I don’t understand how you don’t know about Laura Jennings and whether this is true or not. You need to find out’ Amalie then said but Denise simply shook her head.

‘My father doesn’t share this sort of stuff with me and I certainly don’t want to know about his sex life, thank you very much. In so far as I am concerned, he doesn’t have sex, ever…yuck! Also, I would appreciate if you could not talk about my dad anymore, please. It grosses me out’ Denise said and you knew that, all of this had become a common occurrence ever since the day the first episode of Peaky Blinders aired on BBC, a show which Denise refuses to watch herself because of the heavy sexual content and a show which you, only a week ago, had begun to binge watch.

Cillian’s POV

When Cillian walked into the basement after you had left, he immediately saw the small folded up note you had left him but, reading it, made him somewhat uncomfortable.

He was torn about what to do with it and certainly knew that he should ignore it. He couldn’t see you again even if he wanted to.

The fact that you were 23 years younger than him and that you were his daughter’s best friend made it all wrong and highly inappropriate and he didn’t know what had gotten into him in the first place when he gave into you.

He had never felt attracted towards you in any sort of way until that last visit which was the first time had seen you since you and your family had moved away.

You changed in many ways and he wasn’t sure what it was that he liked about you. But what he knew was that it was more than just sexual attraction, which was usually something he knew how to supress.

With that in mind, he placed your note into his wallet and decided to ignore it for now. But he couldn’t quite bring himself to throw it out.

***

With his bags packed it was time for him to return to Manchester and resume filming of the final season of Peaky Blinders.

The first week of filming went well and Cillian decided to spend the weekend with his friend, fellow actress Laura Jennings. Cillian and her had developed a friend with benefits sort of relationship. No strings attached and no feelings involved. After his divorce from Denise’s mother, he wasn’t ready for anything else and Laura would certainly not have been the type of woman he would have wanted a relationship with in the first place.

Unlike him, she wasn’t press shy and, whilst they kept their arrangement a secret as best as they could, she was otherwise quite active on social media.

Cillian, on the other hand, only maintained a private Instagram account with the sole purpose of being able to check on his children. Whilst they were adults, he was still worried about them, especially Denise who had recently gotten herself in a lot of trouble after distancing herself from this Jeremy boy.

***

‘Another wine?’ Laura asked as Cillian was relaxing on top of the doonas, wearing nothing but his black Calvin Klein briefs, after they had spent the last hour doing exactly what friends with benefits would do after not having seen each other for over two weeks due to busy filming schedules.

‘Yes please…thanks’ he responded as he reached for his phone after a notification had popped up.

It was his daughter Denise who had posted on Instagram and, since she hadn’t posted for a while, he decided to check it out, hoping that she wasn’t with Jeremy again.

To his surprise, three new pictures of Denise and her friends showed up when he opened the APP and, one of them, there was you.

In the picture, you were wearing accompanied by a man in his late twenties, wearing a suit while you were wearing a dark blue dress and he couldn’t help but wonder who the man by your side was.

You looked simply stunning, with your hair long and open and your shoulders exposed. You were wearing only a little bit of make up and showed your beautiful smile.  

‘There you go Mr Murphy’ Laura then said as she returned to the bedroom with another glass of wine, pulling Cillian’s phone out of his hand and climbing on top of him.

‘Round Two?’ she then asked eagerly as she reached for another condom, but Cillian’s thoughts were elsewhere entirely.

‘Maybe tomorrow, I am tired. It has been a long week, sorry’ he explained, causing Laura to pout with disappointment.

But the second round never eventuated as Cillian left Laura’s house the following morning to drive back to Manchester to resume filming.

On his way back to Manchester, he called his daughter Denise to check on her and while he did, he enquired about your companion on the Instagram posts.

‘Why do you want to know?’ Denise asked somewhat confused but Cillian played it cool.

‘He looks familiar, that’s all. Didn’t he go to your school?’ he then asked, playing dumb.

‘Oh god no, he is 29. His name is Connor and he is an accountant. Y/N wouldn’t date anyone our age. You know she isn’t a normal 21-year-old’ Denise joked, referring to your nerdiness and intellect.

‘Apparently not’ Cillian chuckled before asking another question about the stranger on the picture. ‘So, they are dating?’ he asked.

‘I think they went on two or three dates or something. Why do you care?’ Denise asked.

‘No reason. I was just wondering’ Cillian confirmed before changing the topic.

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