#i wish she hadnt told me like she had. like a GOTCHA! so she could win the argument that
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Visit Tumblr Blog
Explore Tumblr blogs with no restrictions, modern design and the best experience.
Last Seen Tumblr Blogs
Fun Fact
Tumblr has a low social media market share in South America.
Text
i just want to be able to forgive her
#dellete#tw for discussion of SA + forced pregnancy in tags#the fact that im a product of SA doesnt really surprise me#i wish she hadnt told me like she had. like a GOTCHA! so she could win the argument that#she started and that i kept telling her i didnt want to have#i just want to be able to forgive her. for everything.#for all the shit when we lived together and for refusing to acknowledge any of it when i moved out#i just want to be able to forgive her#i miss my dad so much. despite everything i do. he was good to me. he begged for my forgiveness. my artwork and all my writing is all#dedicated to and inspired by him#hes an old man and he might die soon and i wont be able to thank him for any of it because my mother will probably attempt suicide if i try#to contact him#so ill never have much of a relationship with my dad#and ill never have a relationship with my mum because of what she did to me#and i know it takes practice and time and effort#but making friends is a real challenge for me sometimes#and im so lonely. im so lonely and i miss how it was to be a kid#to feel like i belonged somewhere or something like that#like i could make for myself a place in the world#when my dad dies my artwork will have been for nothing. and i want to forgive my mum#i want to go home. i want to go home to the place i grew up in#and i know she refuses to sell that house eventhough its a huge financial drain because she doesnt want to let go of th#the memory when i was a kid and not such a fucking disappointment#and i want so badly. to be the kid i used to be#i want to forgive her. i want to pretend that she didnt#reveal to me that neither she nor my father ever wanted me for no other reason than to make me feel bad#for setting boundaries#i want to forgive i want to forget#i want to forget#i just want to forget why cant i forget
3 notes
·
View notes