#i wish i was a better brother to my sister
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my game, your rules. — ldh part three (FINAL)
‧˚⭒ pairing: lee donghyuck x afab reader 18+MDNI ‧˚⭒ genre: brothers best friend au! fake dating! friends to lovers! humor! fluff! angst! smut! adult life au! jenos sister! flirty hc! ‧˚⭒ word count: 11k+ ‧˚⭒ cw: the beginning part is mostly angst, sorry! smut towards the end. dirty talking, raw sex, choking, etc. drinking, mentions of jaehyun, dom hc. ‧˚⭒ summary: you’re fed up with your family constantly telling you how to live your life, but what would they think if you showed up with your brother’s best friend as your new boyfriend? even worse—what happens when you realize you’re actually falling for him?
‧˚⭒ a/n: thank you for the wait everyone! i realized due to my personal life being so busy sometimes, i’m prob better off sticking to long one shots lmao. sorry i had to end it short at three parts. i'll be working on another one shot soon, thank you to everyone who engaged with the series, enjoy! (ignore any grammatical errors if any)
previous
It was one thing to pretend to be with your brother’s best friend, and another to actually be with your brother’s best friend, but what do you call it when the best friend you’re fake dating starts to feel… real?
You guessed it was whatever complicated, undefined thing you had going on with Haechan right now.
It had been several nights since the first time you’d slept together, and somehow, it had slipped into your routine without much discussion. Every evening, he was there—waiting outside your job to pick you up, a sly grin on his face as if it was the most natural thing in the world. Days and nights repeated like clockwork, neither of you acknowledging the shift, as if naming it would make it too real. Instead, you both just… enjoyed it.
“Fine, we’ll talk about it in the morning.”
Your own words replayed in your mind endlessly, and you found yourself wishing they had been a promise instead of an empty phrase, left to dissolve into the early hours of the day.
Yet, even without a label, you couldn’t deny the effect he had on you. Your stress was melting away bit by bit, the weight of work no longer consuming you like it used to. For the first time in what felt like forever, you were beginning to understand the elusive concept of a work-life balance.
As you stood in front of the mirror, your gaze traveled over your reflection. Love bites peppered your skin, faint but impossible to ignore. Each one held a memory, moments you couldn’t help but replay in your head. You smiled softly, warmth spreading through you at the thought of him.
You missed him already.
“What’s taking so long?” Karina’s voice snapped you out of your thoughts, followed by a series of impatient knocks on the bathroom door.
“Sorry!” you called back, hurriedly finishing your last-minute outfit adjustments. “I’m coming out now!”
Tonight was girls night—a night you’d promised yourself would be nothing but fun, but as you opened the door and met Karina’s scrutinizing gaze, you couldn’t help but wonder how much of the night your thoughts would linger on Haechan.
“Impatient much?” you teased Karina as you slipped on your earrings.
“It’s been forever since it’s just been the two of us,” she said with a dramatic sigh. “I swear, I should sue Haechan for stealing you away from me.”
You laughed lightly, shaking your head. “No need to worry. Tomorrow’s the night he meets my family, and soon after, our ‘relationship’”—you emphasized with air quotes—“will officially be over. I get my peace, and they get to meet someone who isn’t you for once.”
Karina leaned against the doorframe, her sharp gaze raking over you like she was trying to read between the lines. “You’re not convincing me,” she said, raising a brow. “Do you think you can hide those marks? Please, you two are so deep in denial it’s almost painful to watch.”
Her words hit like a sucker punch, and you fumbled for a response. It had nothing to do with your best friend, but all with the fact that Haechan has been a bit distant today. You didn’t want to flood your thoughts with worry, but the intensity of your underlying feelings were too much to ignore. Instead of addressing the comment, you busied yourself with adjusting the strap on your heels, your eyes glued to the floor. “Like I said, it’ll be ending soon. Can we not talk about him right now?”
Karina frowned but didn’t push further, though her knowing expression didn’t go unnoticed.
Meanwhile, across town, Haechan sat on his couch, the glow of his phone illuminating his frustrated expression. He knew you were going out with Karina tonight—you’d told him—but something about it gnawed at him. He hadn’t responded to your last text, and even when he did, it took hours because every reply felt like walking a tightrope.
The thought of you at a club, surrounded by strangers, without him, it sent his mind spiraling. What if some guy tried something? Worse, what if you met someone—someone you actually liked—and decided to drop this whole fake relationship?
“Would that be cheating?” he muttered under his breath, running a hand through his hair. “Yes—no—shit.”
This wasn’t real. At least, that’s what he kept telling himself; every lingering glance, every stolen moment, and every kiss that left him breathless felt all too real. The weight of unspoken feelings hung between you both like a thread threatening to snap. He turned his phone off and on again, trying to distract himself, but the pull you had on him was intoxicating, inescapable.
Back at your apartment, Karina softened, rubbing your back in a gesture of comfort. “I’m sorry,” she said quietly. “It’s not my place to bring up your love life. Let’s just go have fun tonight, okay? Who knows, maybe we’ll both go home with someone new.”
Her attempt to lighten the mood made you smile despite yourself. “Yeah, let’s just have fun,” you echoed, grabbing your purse and heading for the door.
Even as you walked out with Karina, a small part of you wondered if Haechan was thinking about you as much as you were thinking about him.
Meanwhile, Haechan logged online with Jeno, hoping a few rounds of gaming would help clear his mind. However, playing with your brother, of all people, might not have been the smartest way to distract himself.
“So, are you nervous about tomorrow night?” Jeno asked as they waited for the game to load.
“Not really,” Haechan replied honestly. “I’ve met your parents before. They’re nice people.”
Jeno adjusted his mic. “Yeah, but you’ve met them as my friend. You’ve never met them as my sister’s boyfriend. Not to mention, it’s the first time she’s bringing someone home.”
Haechan shifted uncomfortably in his seat, the weight of Jeno’s words sinking in. The idea of meeting your parents in this new role suddenly felt a lot heavier than it had before.
He had pitched this whole fake dating idea to help you out, to make your life easier during a time when you needed it most. He’d told himself that was all it was. Deep down, he knew it wasn’t just that anymore. Somewhere along the way, the lies stopped feeling like lies.
The hand-holding wasn’t just for show. The playful teasing, the lingering touches, the way his chest tightened whenever you smiled at him—it had all become painfully real. With each passing day, the guilt of keeping this from Jeno gnawed at him more.
He thought back to one of the nights you’d slept over. You’d fallen asleep in his arms, your breathing soft and even, while he stayed awake, unable to tear his eyes away from you. His gaze had traced the curve of your cheek, the way your lashes fanned out against your skin. Without thinking, he’d leaned closer, pressing a ghost of a kiss to your hair.
This had become his new normal—holding you, being with you. Every time he thought about what came next, a deep ache settled in his chest. What if this all ended? What if he lost you?
“Hello? You good?” Jeno’s voice broke through his thoughts, dragging him back to the present.
“Yeah, my fault,” Haechan muttered, fumbling with his keyboard. “Um… yeah, I guess I am nervous— but you’ll be there too, so not much to worry about, right?”
“Exactly, bro,” Jeno said, his tone light. “You’ve got this. Now, focus up—I’m getting mobbed over here!”
Haechan managed a small laugh, though it didn’t reach his eyes. “On it,” he replied, diving into the game.
As the action picked up, his thoughts remained elsewhere. His grip tightened on the mouse, his chest heavy with the weight of his own emotions. This was going to be a long night.
Three shots in, and you were already feeling it. You’d never been one to hold your alcohol well. While you weren’t completely gone, you were definitely teetering on the edge of tipsy and drunk. The music thumped through the club, vibrating in your chest, and the dim lighting made it easy to lose yourself in the atmosphere.
“There’s my girl! Look at you having a good time!” Karina cheered, hyping you up as you squeezed the life out of a lemon wedge after your latest shot.
You coughed, shaking your head with a laugh. “I’m getting there, that’s for sure.”
Karina plopped down on the barstool beside you, resting her chin in her hand as she watched you with a fond expression. “Not to kill the buzz or anything, but do you think you’re ready to talk about what’s been weighing on you? I can tell you’ve got something on your chest, and you won’t fully let loose until you do.”
You hesitated, your eyes drifting to the crowd behind her. That’s when you spotted him—a man dressed clean and sharp, head to toe. His neatly parted black hair framed deep, unreadable eyes, and they were locked on you. Feeling a strange flutter of nerves, you quickly shook it off, turning back to Karina as you fidgeted with the rim of your shot glass.
“I guess it’s no secret that Haechan and I have been… kind of together? I don’t really know what to call it.” You sighed, glancing at her. “I mean, yeah, we’re supposed to be pretending, but lately, it’s felt a lot more serious. No matter how much we try to keep it casual, we just keep getting pulled toward each other— and sleeping together? That’s only made it worse.”
Karina’s brow arched slightly, but she stayed silent, letting you continue.
“I’m scared this is all Haechan wants,” you admitted, rubbing your temples. “What if I’m just something to pass the time? I’m too afraid to bring it up because if I’m wrong, and I read this all wrong… what then? What if I ruin everything, and he rejects me for real? That would be awkward as hell.”
Karina’s wide eyes softened, and she reached out to rub your back. “Wow. Yeah, that’s a lot to carry around. No wonder you’ve been so tense,” she said gently. “But listen, you’ve got to talk to him. Tell him exactly what you just told me. If it doesn’t work out, at least you’ll know you tried—and hey, this whole thing has already benefited you in some ways, right? Don’t feel guilty for walking away if that’s what you decide to do. You’re not actually together, so you don’t owe anyone anything. You can do what’s best for you.”
Her words brought some comfort, and you smiled at her, feeling a flicker of gratitude. Before you could respond, the bartender approached, placing a tall margarita with a cherry on top in front of you.
“A gentleman paid for your drink and the next few shots for you two,” he explained.
“What the hell…” Karina whispered, scanning the room with wide eyes.
Your gaze followed hers until it landed on the same man from earlier. He was making his way toward you now, a confident stride and a charming smile revealing deep dimples.
“Hello, ladies,” he greeted smoothly, his voice rich and warm.
“Well, hello, handsome,” Karina replied, nudging your leg under the bar as she batted her lashes.
His smile lingered, but his eyes moved to yours, the anticipation in them unmistakable. “I’m Jaehyun,” he introduced himself, “I just wanted to say you both look absolutely stunning tonight.”
“Thank you, Jaehyun! We appreciate that, don’t we?” Karina said, looking at you expectantly.
You hesitated before giving him your name, your voice quieter than you intended. His reaction caught you off guard—he took your hand and kissed it lightly. “Wonderful to meet you,” he said, his smile deepening. “I’ll let you get back to your conversation, but if you’d like to have a good time together, well—this is for you.”
As he walked off, Karina grabbed your arm. “Wow! Talk about dreamy! What did he give you?”
You unfolded the napkin he’d placed in your hand, already knowing what to expect. Inside was a neat scrawl: In case you need another shoulder to lean on ;) – J followed by his number.
You rolled your eyes. “Great. Just what I needed.”
Karina laughed, shaking her head. “If you’re not going to use it, you can pass it my way!”
“No way,” you said firmly. “I don’t need the reminder of this awkward interaction if you end up hooking up with him.” Stuffing the napkin into your purse, you resolved to toss it later.
“Fine, but that’s a major loss,” she teased. “How about this instead: we finish our free drinks, grab something sweet to eat, and call it a night?”
You smiled at her sincerity. “Sounds like a plan.”
The plan, however, turned out to be a little hazier than expected. Jaehyun had paid for more shots than you realized, and by the time you left the club, you and Karina were beyond tipsy, stumbling into an Uber together.
After dropping Karina off safely, you found yourself standing in front of Haechan’s building instead of your own. Buzzing his apartment repeatedly, you chuckled loudly into the intercom when his tired, slightly annoyed voice answered.
“May I ask who’s obliterating my buzzer at this hour?”
“It’s meeee!” you said through a fit of giggles.
There was a pause, and then the door buzzed open. Moments later, Haechan met you in the hallway, his arms crossed as he watched you nearly trip over your own feet.
“Someone had fun tonight, I see,” he teased, shaking his head as he walked over to steady you.
You clutched onto his shirt, looking up at him with glassy eyes. “Can’t have fun when I’m missing you so much,” you mumbled.
His teasing grin softened into something gentler, and he wrapped an arm around you, guiding you to his apartment. Once inside, he carefully sat you on the edge of his bed, rummaging through his drawers for some comfortable clothes for you to change into.
Haechan gently changed your clothes for you, his touch careful and deliberate. Using the makeup remover wipes you’d left at his place over the past few weeks, he softly cleaned your face, wary of being too rough as he worked around your features.
“Let me grab you some water, okay? Just get comfortable,” he said, tucking a stray strand of hair behind your ear. You nodded sleepily, sinking into the pillows as he disappeared into the kitchen.
Your gaze wandered across the room, catching the faint glow from his gaming monitor. A small smile tugged at your lips as you pictured him sitting there, completely immersed in a match, his focused expression etched in your memory. You reached toward the side table, expecting to find your phone, only to remember it was still in your purse.
“Hyuckieeee!” you called, raising your voice as much as your drunk tired state allowed. “Can you bring me my phone, pleaseeee? It’s in my purse!”
“Yes, ma’am!” he replied, his voice light and playful.
In the kitchen, Haechan grabbed a glass of water before reaching for your purse. As he rummaged through it to find your phone, a folded napkin clung to the device, slipping free and floating to the floor. He bent to pick it up, expecting it to be nothing—but then his eyes caught the scrawled handwriting.
In case you need another shoulder to lean on ;) – J xxx-xxx-xxxx.
His playful smile vanished instantly. It was like the air had been sucked out of the room. For a moment, he stood frozen, blinking at the napkin as though he could force the words to change.
Who the hell was J? Why did you have his number? And why the hell did he feel like the ground beneath him was starting to crumble?
“Hyuccccck!” your voice whined from the other room, pulling him out of his spiraling thoughts.
His heart pounded as he shoved the napkin back into your purse, burying it as deep as he could. Grabbing your phone, he forced himself to compose his expression before walking back into the bedroom.
“Here,” he said, his voice a little too quiet as he handed you your phone and set the glass of water on the nightstand.
You barely noticed the change in his demeanor, already distracted as you unlocked your phone. Haechan, however, didn’t linger. He walked to his desk, muttered a quick goodnight to Jeno—completely ignoring whatever your brother was saying—and shut down his computer.
“W-Wait!” you called after him, frowning when you realized he was heading toward the door. “You’re not staying?”
He paused, his back to you. “You’ve had a long night, and tomorrow’s going to be even longer,” he said flatly, his voice devoid of its usual warmth. “You need sleep, and I can’t afford for you to get distracted.”
The coldness in his tone made you sit up slightly, confused. “Hyuck—”
“I’ll take the couch,” he interrupted, not turning around. “I’ll drive you home in the morning. Goodnight.”
Before you could respond, he flicked off the light and shut the door behind him.
You blinked at the closed door, baffled by his sudden shift. However, the exhaustion weighed heavy on your body, and soon enough, your head hit the pillow, pulling you into a deep, dreamless sleep.
Meanwhile, Haechan sat on the couch, your purse on the table in front of him like it was mocking him. His mind raced, replaying every moment of the night and every possibility of what that napkin could mean.
His jaw clenched as a wave of jealousy surged through him, mingling with something deeper—something more vulnerable. Was this all a game to you? A distraction? Did this J mean more to you than he did?
Haechan leaned back, staring at the ceiling with a heaviness in his chest he couldn’t shake. Tomorrow was supposed to be the big day—the day he met your parents—but now he wasn’t so sure he could go through with it.
The couch was uncomfortable, but that wasn’t the problem. You were just down the hall, sound asleep in his bed, yet Haechan couldn’t close his eyes for more than a few seconds before they snapped back open.
Your purse sat on the coffee table like it was taunting him, the folded napkin inside feeling heavier than it had any right to. He rubbed his hands over his face, letting out a frustrated sigh as he leaned back against the couch cushions.
It wasn’t real. That’s what he kept reminding himself. You weren’t really his girlfriend, so why did the idea of someone else trying to be with you twist something so raw inside of him?
He replayed the events of the night, the way you had stumbled into his arms at the door, laughing and clinging to him like he was your safe haven. The way you’d told him you missed him—it echoed in his head, warm and sweet, and he had wanted to believe it.
Then he’d seen the napkin.
In case you need another shoulder to lean on.
The words looped in his mind like a curse. He sat up, staring at the purse again, his jaw tightening. Who was this J? Why did you have his number?
You had been with Karina, sure, but what if this guy was someone you’d met at the club? What if he’d been the one to buy you drinks, to make you laugh, to look at you in a way that Haechan foolishly thought only he did?
His fists clenched at the thought, his nails digging into his palms as he tried to push the images out of his head. He had no right to feel this way, he told himself. You weren’t his. Not really.
The idea of you leaning on someone else, laughing with someone else, kissing someone else—it made his stomach churn.
The minutes turned to hours, and the city outside the window grew quieter, yet his mind stayed restless.
He thought back to the times you’d spent together recently. The way your eyes softened when you looked at him, the way your fingers would brush against his as if it were second nature. The quiet moments after the fake laughter, when it felt like everything between you wasn’t fake at all.
Could he have imagined it all? Were the feelings one-sided?
He threw himself back against the couch, running a hand through his hair in frustration. Maybe this was what he deserved. Maybe this was the fallout of blurring the lines, of letting his heart get tangled in something that was never supposed to be real.
Then he thought about tomorrow—or rather, tonight. Meeting your family as your boyfriend. Pretending to be yours in front of the people who mattered most to you. The thought had filled him with nerves before, but now it felt unbearable. How was he supposed to stand there, play the part, when he didn’t even know where he stood with you?
His eyes drifted back to the purse again. It was a small thing, insignificant in the grand scheme of things, yet it felt monumental. That napkin had shattered whatever fragile understanding he thought you shared, leaving him questioning everything.
As the first rays of sunlight began to creep through the window, Haechan sighed deeply, running a hand over his face. His body was heavy with exhaustion, but his mind refused to let him rest.
One thing was certain—if he didn’t get answers soon, he wasn’t sure how much longer he could keep pretending.
The faint scent of coffee and something savory woke you first. You blinked groggily, your head heavy and your body sluggish as you turned toward the nightstand. There, beside a glass of water, was a small bottle of Tylenol waiting for you.
The gesture brought a soft smile to your lips. Even after nights like this, he always took care of you.
Rubbing your temples, you sat up slowly, the ache in your head reminding you of last night’s drinks. The apartment was quiet, save for the faint clinking of dishes coming from the kitchen. Pushing yourself out of bed, you shuffled toward the source of the noise, following the smell of breakfast.
When you stepped into the kitchen, he was already there, leaning against the counter with a coffee mug in hand. A plate of scrambled eggs, toast, and bacon sat on the countertop, clearly made for you.
“Good morning,” you murmured, your voice scratchy from sleep as you pulled out a stool.
He barely glanced at you, taking a sip of his coffee before setting the mug down with a soft clink. “Eat up,” he said flatly, his tone devoid of its usual warmth. “You’re probably hungover.”
The coldness in his voice made you pause. You looked at him carefully, noting the stiffness in his posture, the way his eyes refused to meet yours.
“Thanks,” you said hesitantly, sitting down and picking at the food. You watched him from the corner of your eye, trying to gauge his mood.
When the silence stretched too long, you finally spoke. “Are you okay? You seem… off.”
“I’m fine,” he replied quickly, too quickly.
“You don’t seem fine,” you pressed, setting your fork down. “Did something happen last night?”
He let out a sharp breath through his nose, finally looking at you. His expression was guarded, but there was a flicker of something beneath it—hurt, frustration, something he wasn’t saying.
“I’ll start getting ready,” he said abruptly, brushing past your question. “You should eat and get some rest when you get home. We’ve got that big dinner tonight.”
You reached out instinctively, your fingers brushing against his arm to stop him, but he yanked it back before you could get a firm hold.
The motion was reflexive, but it felt like a slap. The shock of it lingered in the air between you, and you froze, your hand hanging in the space he’d just pulled away from.
“Did you just pull away from me…” your voice trailed off, your words caught somewhere between disbelief and hurt.
“I didn’t mean—” he started, his voice sharper than he intended. When he saw the look on your face, he cut himself off, turning away from you entirely.
“No, talk to me,” you said, standing now. The frustration bubbled up in your chest, and you didn’t care if your head was pounding or if your voice cracked. “What’s going on with you? You’ve been weird since last night. Did I do something?”
He clenched his fists at his sides, his shoulders rigid. “It’s nothing. Just drop it, okay?”
“Nothing?” you echoed incredulously, stepping closer. “You won’t look at me, you won’t talk to me, and now you’re pulling away like I did something wrong. If it’s nothing, then why are you acting like this?”
“Because I’m tired!” he snapped, spinning around to face you. His voice was sharp, the anger in his tone startling you; but beneath it, you heard the cracks, the weight of something deeper. “I’m tired, okay? Of this, of pretending, of…” He stopped himself, running a hand through his hair as if trying to physically push the words back down.
“Of what?” you pressed softly, your heart thudding in your chest.
His jaw clenched, his gaze dropping to the floor. “It doesn’t matter,” he muttered. “I just think you should go home, get some rest, and be ready for dinner tonight. That’s it.”
You stared at him, frustration and confusion swirling in your chest. He wouldn’t look at you, wouldn’t explain himself, and the distance he was putting between you felt suffocating.
“Fine,” you said quietly, the word laced with hurt. “If you want to push me away, then that’s on you.”
He didn’t respond, didn’t look up, didn’t move as you turned on your heel and headed back toward the bedroom to grab your remaining belongings. The door clicked shut behind you, and for a moment, all you could hear was the pounding in your head and the ache growing in your chest.
Whatever was going on, whatever he was holding back—it felt like it was slipping through your fingers, and you didn’t know how to stop it.
Meanwhile, he stood frozen in the kitchen, staring at the spot where you’d just been. His chest felt heavy, and the words he hadn’t said echoed in his mind, louder than anything else.
You stormed out of his room, grabbing your things with shaky hands, your chest tight with frustration and hurt. The air between you had been tense and suffocating, and you couldn’t stay another second in that apartment.
“Wait—” he called after you, his voice laced with urgency.
“I don’t need a ride home, and I don’t need a pity breakfast,” you snapped, your voice sharper than you intended as you reached the door. You turned back for a moment, your heart aching but your pride keeping you standing tall. “I’ll see you tonight, and then after that, whatever this is will be officially done.”
Before he could respond, you slammed the door shut behind you, the sound reverberating through the hallway.
The cold morning air hit your face as you made your way home on foot, each step heavy with unspoken emotions. The weight of everything pressed down on you, but you pushed through, your pace quickening as if moving faster would stop the thoughts from racing in your head.
When you finally reached your apartment, your hands were trembling as you unlocked the door. Once inside, the silence of your room felt deafening. You tossed your bag to the side and collapsed onto your bed, the weight of the morning and everything leading up to it crashing over you.
And then, it all came out.
Tears spilled down your cheeks, hot and relentless as you buried your face in your pillow. The ache in your chest felt unbearable, and no matter how much you tried to quiet yourself, the sobs broke free, filling the room.
The sound must have carried through the walls because moments later, a soft knock came at your door.
“Hey,” Jeno’s voice called through the wood, cautious and concerned. “Are you okay? Can I come in?”
You froze, your breath hitching as you quickly wiped at your face, trying to compose yourself. “I’m fine,” you croaked, but your shaky voice betrayed you.
“Please,” Jeno insisted, the worry in his tone clear. “Let me in.”
Reluctantly, you reached over and unlocked the door. Jeno pushed it open gently, stepping inside and closing it behind him. His eyes immediately found you on the bed, your tear-streaked face buried in your hands.
“Hey,” he said softly, walking over and sitting at the edge of your bed. “What’s going on? Why are you crying?”
You hesitated, your throat tightening as you tried to find the words. “I… I don’t know if we should even do the dinner tonight,” you admitted, your voice trembling.
Jeno frowned, tilting his head in confusion. “Why not? What happened?”
You swallowed hard, debating how much to tell him. For a moment, you considered brushing it off, but the weight of everything you’d been holding inside was too much.
“I—” you started, hesitating before letting out a shaky breath. “I need to tell you the truth about something.”
Jeno’s brows furrowed, his expression soft but cautious. “Okay… I’m listening.”
You sat up slowly, wrapping your arms around your knees. “Haechan and I… we’re not really dating,” you confessed, your voice barely above a whisper.
His eyes widened slightly, but he didn’t interrupt, letting you continue.
“We started fake dating because you and Mom and Dad wouldn’t get off my back about finding someone. I thought it would just be for a while, to take the pressure off, but…” Your voice cracked, and you rubbed at your face, frustrated with yourself.
“But what?” Jeno pressed gently.
“I fell for him,” you admitted, the words tumbling out before you could stop them. “I don’t know when it happened, but it’s not fake for me anymore. Now he’s barely talking to me, and I don’t know what I did wrong or what’s going on in his head. I feel like I ruined everything.”
Jeno stared at you for a moment, his expression unreadable. Then, he let out a sigh and reached over, pulling you into a hug.
“I’m sorry,” he said quietly, his voice full of genuine regret. “I didn’t realize how much pressure we were putting on you. I never meant to push you into something like this.”
You buried your face in his shoulder, the warmth of his embrace soothing some of the ache in your chest.
“I think you need to talk to him,” Jeno said after a moment, pulling back slightly to look at you. “You’re never going to get answers if you don’t. If he doesn’t feel the same way, that’s on him, not you. You were just trying to protect yourself, and there’s nothing wrong with that.”
“What if it makes things worse?” you asked, your voice small.
“Then we deal with it together—or not at all,” Jeno said firmly. “But you deserve to know the truth. Don’t let him leave you in the dark.”
You nodded slowly, the weight of his words sinking in.
“What about me moving out and finding someone? Isn’t that what you want? Isn’t that what Mom and Dad want? To push me out?” you scoff, the words spilling out as your mind flashes back to the way Haechan pushed you away earlier.
Jeno’s reaction is immediate, his tone sharp with hurt. “What are you talking about? You think that’s what this is about? That I want to kick you out?”
You can’t bring yourself to look at him. Instead, you nod slowly, wiping the tears off your cheeks with trembling hands.
Jeno starts to say something but stops, his chest rising and falling with a deep breath as he forces himself to calm down. When he speaks again, his voice is softer, steadier.
“I love you,” he says firmly, his words cutting through the silence. “You’re my sister, and you’re the only one I’ve got. It’s just you and me here, besides Mom and Dad back home. I don’t want you to leave. You’re my real best friend.”
The sincerity in his voice makes your chest tighten, and you blink back fresh tears as he continues.
“I just want to see you happy,” he says, his tone gentle now. “I want to see you live your life, not bury yourself in work or stress. You put so much pressure on yourself, and it kills me to see you overwhelmed all the time. I thought… maybe having someone close to you, someone new, might give you a sense of peace.”
He pauses, running a hand through his hair before sighing. “And listen, I know you said you and Haechan schemed this whole thing, but it’s obvious there’s something between you two. Anyone with eyes can see it.”
Your sobs come back harder, and Jeno instinctively moves closer, rubbing soothing circles on your back. His touch is warm, grounding, as his words wrap around you like a protective shield.
“I’ve always just wanted the best for you,” he says softly, leaning his head closer to yours. “I want you to be happy and healthy, and if that means staying here as long as you need, then stay. I don’t care how long it takes. I’ve got your back. I’m sorry I made you feel like you weren’t welcome. That was never my intention, and I hate that I made you feel this way. I don’t want to push you away.”
You collapse into his arms, burying your face in his shoulder as your sobs come freely. His embrace is strong, steady, as he holds you like he’s anchoring you to the ground. For once, in a while, you felt wanted by your own blood.
“Thank you, Jen,” you manage between cries. “For everything. I’m so sorry I lied to you. I love you.”
He pulls you closer, his chin resting on your head. “I love you too,” he says, his voice thick with emotion. “No more lying, okay? I’ve got your back, no matter what.”
For the first time in what feels like forever, the weight on your chest lifts just slightly, enough for you to breathe. You stay like that for a moment longer, letting yourself cry until the tears run out, until the warmth of your brother’s hug melts away the worst of your pain.
Jeno gave your shoulder a reassuring squeeze before standing. “Thank you for opening up to me. I’ll give you some space. Just let me know if you need anything, okay?”
As he left your room, you could hear him muttering something under his breath. A moment later, the sound of his voice carried through the apartment as he tried to get a hold of Haechan.
“Yeah?” Haechan answers after the third ring, his voice tense.
“Meet me in front of my building in ten minutes,” Jeno says, his tone tight as he tries to keep his anger in check.
“So, she told you?” Haechan asks, his voice low.
“Yeah,” Jeno replies curtly.
Haechan pulls the phone away from his mouth, letting out a desperate sigh as his eyes fix on the ceiling, silently pleading for something—anything—to save him from what’s coming. After a long pause, he exhales sharply. “Okay, I’m on my way.”
Jeno stood outside the complex building, the afternoon sun casting long shadows across the sidewalk. The air was crisp, but it didn’t stop the tension from coiling in his chest. His hands were shoved into his jacket pockets as he waited, replaying the conversation he’d had with his sister earlier.
Her tears, her shaky voice—everything about it had gutted him. Whatever had happened between her and Haechan, it needed to be resolved. Jeno wasn’t the kind of brother to let things like this slide, not when it was so obvious how much she was hurting.
Finally, he spotted Haechan approaching from a distance. The usual lightness in his step was gone, replaced by a slower, heavier gait. His hands were stuffed deep into the pockets of his hoodie, his head tilted down, as if he already knew what was coming.
When Haechan reached him, Jeno didn’t waste time. “Do you love her?”
The question hit like a punch, straightforward and impossible to dodge. Haechan froze for a moment, his eyes widening slightly before his gaze darted to the ground.
“Yes,” he admitted, his voice quiet but steady. “I do. I have for a while now.”
Jeno’s shoulders relaxed slightly, but his expression remained firm. “Then what the hell happened?”
Haechan let out a long breath, running a hand through his hair. “I… I don’t know, man. She came over last night after the club, and everything was fine until I found this note in her purse. It was from some guy—‘J’ or whatever—and it just… messed me up. I didn’t know what to think.”
Jeno frowned, his brows furrowing. “A note? From who?”
“I don’t know,” Haechan said, his voice rising slightly. “It was just some number and a message about being there for her. It made me think—what if I’m not enough? What if she’s keeping her options open?”
Jeno’s jaw tightened, his frustration bubbling. “So you let your jealousy get the better of you and pushed her away instead of talking to her?”
“I didn’t push her away,” Haechan argued weakly, though the guilt in his voice was evident. “I just… I didn’t know how to handle it.”
Jeno shook his head, exhaling sharply. “She loves you, Hyuck. She told me everything—how you two started this whole fake dating thing because of me and our parents. Only, it’s not fake for her anymore. She’s scared you don’t feel the same, and now she’s in her room crying because she thinks you don’t care.”
Haechan blinked, his breath catching. “She… she said that?”
“Yeah, she did,” Jeno said firmly. “And let me tell you something—you’re one of my best friends, Hyuck. You’re a good guy, but if you care about her, you need to prove it. You can’t keep shutting her out every time something scares you.”
Haechan swallowed hard, the weight of Jeno’s words sinking in.
“You’ve been a great friend to me,” Jeno continued, his voice softer now. “I know you’re the kind of person who would go to the ends of the earth for the people you care about. So if you really want to be with her, if you see a future with her, then you need to go upstairs, talk to her, and fix this. Don’t let one very stupid misunderstanding ruin everything.”
Haechan’s hands clenched at his sides, his heart racing as he processed everything.
“What if I screw it up again?” he asked quietly, his voice barely above a whisper.
Jeno placed a firm hand on his shoulder, his expression both serious and reassuring. “Then you keep trying. Relationships aren’t perfect, but they’re worth it when it’s real—and this? I can tell it’s real for both of you. So don’t waste any more time.”
Haechan nodded slowly, the resolve in his chest growing stronger. Without another word, he turned toward the building, his legs carrying him toward the confrontation he both dreaded and needed.
Jeno watched him go, letting out a deep sigh. For the first time all day, he felt a glimmer of hope that maybe—just maybe—things would turn out the way they were supposed to.
You had finally managed to calm yourself down after a long, warm shower and curling up under the covers of your bed. Yet, no matter how hard you tried, your mind kept replaying the events of the morning. Every sharp word, every look, every lingering feeling—it all circled in your head like a storm you couldn’t escape.
A sudden knock at your door interrupted your spiraling thoughts.
“Yeah?” you called out, assuming it was Jeno checking on you again. The door creaked open slowly, and when you looked up, it wasn’t Jeno.
Haechan stood there, hesitating in the doorway, his hand gripping the frame as if he needed it to steady himself.
“Hey… Can I come in?” he asked, his voice quieter than usual, almost cautious.
You swallowed hard, fighting back the tears that you’d fought so hard to push down. Fidgeting with your hands, you nodded. “Sure.”
He stepped inside, closing the door behind him gently, as though he was afraid of shattering the fragile air between you. He moved to the corner of your bed, sitting down hesitantly, his posture stiff and uncertain.
“I’m sorry,” he began, his voice tinged with guilt. “For the way I reacted this morning. I was upset, and I shouldn’t have taken it out on you. You gave me every chance to talk, and I just… didn’t.”
You stayed silent, watching him from the head of your bed, the weight of his words making your chest tighten.
“Truth is,” he continued, rubbing his hands together, “I found that napkin in your purse last night. You know, the one with the note.”
Suddenly, everything clicked.
“I got jealous,” he admitted, his voice breaking slightly. “At first, that’s all it was. However, the more I read it, the more frustrated I got—not because some other guy was interested in you, but because I realized it was more than that.”
He sighed, his hand running through his hair, tugging at the strands in a way you recognized as his tell when he was struggling to get the words out.
“I like you,” he said, his voice soft but firm. “A lot. I like you a lot more than like, actually.” He let out a small, nervous laugh, shaking his head as his eyes dropped to the floor.
“Ever since we met, I’ve liked you,” he confessed, his voice quieter now. “At first, I didn’t say anything because you’re Jeno’s sister. What kind of friend would I be if I got feelings for my best friend’s sister, right? Then, it turned into something so much more than that. You became my best friend, too. The first person I think about when I wake up, the last person I think about before I fall asleep, and the only person in my dreams. You’re everywhere in my head.”
Your breath hitched as his words sank in, tears spilling down your cheeks before you could stop them.
“I know,” he continued, his voice thick with emotion. “It was my idea to start all of this. At first, it was just pretending, but then it became real. For me, it became so real. And that note? That stupid, meaningless note? It wasn’t even about the guy—it was about me. I hated that a complete stranger had the courage to tell you how he felt when I couldn’t, even after everything we’ve shared. I let my pride and my fear get in the way, and I hurt you because of it. I’m so sorry.”
This time, he looked up, his eyes locking with yours. They weren’t cold like they had been this morning. They were warm, soft, familiar—filled with the Haechan you knew and cared for. Slowly, he reached out, his hand brushing against your cheek as he wiped away your tears.
“I’m truly sorry, love,” he said, his voice trembling slightly but full of conviction. “If you’ll let me, I don’t want to pretend anymore. I don’t want this to be fake. I want us—you and me—to be real. Please, let’s make this real.”
His words hung in the air, each one wrapping around your heart and tugging at it. You stared at him, your lips parting slightly as you tried to process the raw sincerity in his confession. The way his eyes bore into yours, the vulnerability etched across his face, it all broke down every last wall you’d built to keep your feelings hidden.
Slowly, your body moved on its own. You crawled across the bed, closing the small space between you and Haechan before throwing your arms around his shoulders. His warmth engulfed you as your head nestled against his neck, and for the first time all day, you allowed yourself to melt into him.
Haechan’s arms wrapped tightly around you, pulling you even closer as he let out a shaky breath. “I’m sorry,” he whispered, his lips brushing against your hair. “I’m so sorry. I’ll never do that to you again. I promise, I’ll never hurt you like that again.”
His voice cracked with emotion, the words tumbling out over and over as he held you. His hand ran soothingly along your back while the other cradled the back of your head.
You stayed like that for a moment, soaking in his warmth and the steady beat of his heart. When you finally pulled back, your hands remained on his shoulders, and you found yourself looking into his eyes—those deep, soulful eyes that were filled with nothing but regret and love.
“The note,” you started softly, your voice steady despite the lump in your throat. “It was from some random guy at the club. He handed it to me, and I shoved it in my purse so I could throw it out later. But… we got drunk, and I completely forgot it was even there.”
His expression shifted instantly, from shock to embarrassment, and finally to guilt. “So it really didn’t mean anything?” he asked, his voice almost timid.
You shook your head firmly. “Not a thing. I didn’t even remember it existed until just now.”
Haechan exhaled a deep breath, running a hand through his hair. “I’m an idiot,” he muttered, more to himself than to you. “I overthought everything, and I pushed you away when I should’ve just asked you.”
You gave him a small, tentative smile, your fingers absentmindedly smoothing over his shoulders. “You’re not an idiot,” you said gently. “You were scared, and honestly? So was I.”
His brows furrowed slightly, his gaze softening as he tilted his head in curiosity. “Scared?”
You nodded, your cheeks warming under his intense gaze. “Scared because… I like you, too. A lot. Maybe more than a lot.” You let out a nervous laugh, your hands dropping to your lap. “I think I’ve been trying so hard to convince myself that this was just pretend because I didn’t want to ruin anything between us. But the truth is, I don’t want to pretend anymore either. I want us to start over—for real this time.”
His eyes widened at your words, and for a moment, he just stared at you, completely still. Then, as if something clicked inside him, his expression changed. The regret and guilt melted away, replaced by something so raw, so full of love and passion that it took your breath away.
Haechan reached for your face, his hands cradling your cheeks as if you were the most delicate thing in the world. “You mean that?” he asked, his voice barely above a whisper, his eyes searching yours.
You nodded, your smile trembling as tears welled in your eyes. “I mean it.”
That was all he needed. In an instant, he leaned in, capturing your lips with his in a kiss that was both passionate, real, and impossibly tender. His lips moved against yours with a reverence that made your heart ache, as if he were pouring every unspoken word, every hidden feeling, into that single moment.
Your hands found their way to his chest, clutching at his hoodie as you kissed him back, matching the intensity of his emotions. It was like the world had faded away, leaving just the two of you, tangled in each other and the overwhelming feelings you’d kept buried for so long.
When he finally pulled back, his forehead rested against yours, and his thumb brushed against your cheek, wiping away the tears you hadn’t even realized had fallen.
“I love you,” he whispered, his voice trembling with the weight of his confession.
Your breath hitched, and your lips curved into a smile as you looked into his eyes. “I love you, too,” you said, your voice steady and full of truth.
The smile that broke across his face was radiant, and he pulled you into his arms again, holding you like he never wanted to let go. For the first time, there was no doubt, no pretending—just the two of you, finally on the same page.
The evening had finally arrived, and the three of you—Jeno, Haechan, and yourself—stood outside your parents' house. The warm glow of the porch light illuminated the path, casting a comforting hue that did little to calm the nerves buzzing in your chest. Haechan stood beside you, his hand brushing against yours, and when you glanced at him, he gave you a small smile, his own nerves barely hidden beneath his confident exterior.
“You guys ready?” Jeno asked, breaking the silence.
You nodded, inhaling deeply as you stepped forward.
When the door opened, the familiar warmth of your parents' home enveloped you. Your mom greeted you with a tight hug, her smile as radiant as ever. Your dad stood just behind her, his eyes lighting up as he welcomed all of you inside.
“Come in, come in! It’s been too long,” your mom said, ushering everyone inside.
As you stepped into the living room, Haechan gave your parents a polite bow, his usual charm already working its magic. “Thank you for having us tonight,” he said, his voice steady but tinged with warmth.
“Of course, Haechan,” your mom replied, smiling at him. “It’s nice to finally have you here as more than just Jeno’s friend.”
Your dad raised an eyebrow, a curious look passing over his face. “Oh? What’s that supposed to mean?”
This was it. You glanced at Haechan, and he gave you a reassuring nod, his hand discreetly finding yours. Together, you both stepped forward, standing side by side in front of your parents.
“Well,” you began, your voice steady despite the butterflies in your stomach. “We wanted to let you know that Donghyuck and I… we’re together now. Officially. He’s my boyfriend.”
Haechan’s smile widened as he looked at your parents, his voice filled with pride and sincerity as he added, “It’s true. I care about your daughter a lot, and I promise to always treat her with the love and respect she deserves.”
Your parents exchanged a quick glance, their expressions softening.
“Well,” your dad said after a moment, his voice warm, “if our daughter is happy, that’s all that matters to us.”
Your mom’s smile was beaming now as she stepped forward, squeezing you into a hug first before turning to Haechan. “Welcome to the family,” she said, patting his shoulder affectionately.
Behind you, Jeno let out a low whistle, crossing his arms as a smug grin spread across his face. “I told you they’d approve,” he said, clearly enjoying the moment.
You shot him a playful glare, but the warmth in his expression softened your teasing.
As the night unfolded, the five of you gathered around the dining table, the smell of your mom’s cooking filling the air. The conversation flowed easily, laughter punctuating the clinking of silverware. Haechan charmed your parents effortlessly, sharing stories of how you two had grown closer and subtly leaving out the “fake dating” part of your history.
Jeno leaned back in his chair, watching the scene with a satisfied look. His best friend and his sister were happy, his parents were smiling, and for once, everything felt exactly as it should be.
Your dad clapped Haechan on the back after dinner, laughing at one of his jokes. “You’re alright, kid,” he said. “Take care of my daughter, okay?”
“Always,” Haechan replied, his voice full of conviction.
By the time dessert was served, you felt a weight lifting from your chest. Sitting beside Haechan, with his hand resting comfortably on your knee under the table, you realized this was the first time you’d truly felt free. No more hiding, no more stress, no more pretending—just you and him, together, surrounded by the people you loved.
As the night wound down and your mom started clearing plates, Haechan leaned over to you, his voice low enough for only you to hear. “I can’t believe this is real.”
You turned to him, your smile soft. “It is, we don’t have to hide anymore.”
He grinned, leaning in to press a gentle kiss to your temple. “I love you,” he whispered.
“I love you too,” you replied, feeling the words settle warmly in your chest. Finally, you weren’t scared to say it.
As you glanced around the table, seeing the joy on your parents’ faces and Jeno’s approving nod, you knew this was the start of something beautiful. A life where you and Haechan could love each other openly, honestly, and fully—just as it was always meant to be.
BONUS
Months had passed since that dinner with your parents, and your relationship with Haechan had only grown stronger. Gone were the days of pretending and sneaking around. Now, you could openly love each other, and you savored every moment of it. Tonight was no exception.
The neon lights of the club bathed the group in a kaleidoscope of colors. Music thumped through the air, and laughter echoed as you, Haechan, Jeno, Karina, Mark, and Chenle occupied one of the larger booths. Drinks lined the table, and everyone was in high spirits, swaying to the rhythm of the music or yelling jokes over the pounding bass.
“Here,” Haechan said, sliding a glass across the table to you. “One for the prettiest girl in the room.”
You rolled your eyes playfully, taking the drink. “You’re shameless.”
“You love it,” he teased, leaning in to steal a quick kiss before anyone could interrupt.
“Hey!” Karina exclaimed, pointing her straw at the two of you. “We agreed to keep the PDA to a minimum tonight!”
Haechan shrugged, throwing an arm around your shoulders as he smirked. “What can I say? I can’t help myself.”
You nudged him, trying to suppress a laugh as Jeno and Chenle made exaggerated gagging sounds.
“Alright, lovebirds,” Mark said, grinning as he tipped his drink toward you both. “At least try to make it through one night without making the rest of us single people feel bad.”
“Who’s single?” Karina piped up, earning a round of laughter from everyone at the table.
As the night went on, the group gradually dispersed onto the dance floor. Haechan stayed by your side, his hand never leaving yours. You danced with him among your friends, his playful energy infectious as he twirled you under the flashing lights.
At one point, you found yourselves back at the bar, catching your breath and sipping on water.
“You know,” Haechan said, his tone suddenly lowered as he leaned closer, “you look absolutely stunning tonight.”
Your cheeks warmed under his gaze. “You’ve told me that about three times already.”
“I’ll say it a hundred more times if I want to,” he replied, his eyes glinting with mischief.
You tilted your head, narrowing your eyes at him. “Careful, Donghyuck. You’re laying it on a little thick.”
He grinned, leaning in so his lips brushed your ear. “If you think this is thick, wait till I get you alone.”
Your heart skipped a beat, and you pushed him lightly, trying to hide the flush on your cheeks. “You’re impossible.”
“You’re irresistible,” he quipped, finishing his drink and setting the glass down. “Come on.”
“Where?” you asked, watching as he grabbed your hand and started leading you away from the bar.
“Somewhere we can actually hear each other,” he said with a wink, weaving the two of you through the crowd.
It didn’t take long before you found yourselves in one of the quieter private rooms tucked away in the back of the club. The walls muffled the music just enough, creating a more intimate atmosphere. A small couch and a dim overhead light added to the cozy vibe.
Haechan shut the door behind you, turning to face you with a smirk that sent butterflies fluttering in your stomach. “Now this,” he said, stepping closer, “is more like it.”
You laughed, backing up until your legs hit the couch. “So, what’s your plan now that you’ve dragged me back here?”
He didn’t answer right away. Instead, he pulled you into his arms, swaying gently to the faint rhythm of the music that still seeped through the walls. His hands rested on your waist as he leaned his forehead against yours.
“Dance with me,” he whispered, his voice soft.
Your breath caught in your throat, but you smiled, wrapping your arms around his neck. The two of you moved slowly, completely lost in your own little world.
As the song in the distance changed to something slower, Haechan tilted your chin up, his eyes locking with yours. “You know,” he said, his voice barely audible, “I think this is my favorite place to be—with you.”
Your chest tightened at the sincerity in his words. “Hyuck…”
Before you could say anything else, he closed the gap between you, his lips capturing yours in a kiss that was both tender and electric. His hands tightened on your waist, pulling you closer as the kiss deepened, leaving you breathless.
The world outside faded entirely, leaving only the two of you wrapped up in each other. His fingers traced gentle patterns along your back, and when he pulled away just enough to whisper, “I love you,” his voice was steady and sure.
Your heart swelled, and you cupped his face, your thumbs brushing against his cheeks as you whispered back, “I love you too.”
Haechan grinned, his eyes lighting up with pure joy before he kissed you again, his movements more urgent but still filled with the same passion.
Getting lost in not only the kiss but in his touch you find yourself breathing heavier the closer his lips moved down your neck.
"W-What are you doing?" you asked, a low chuckle escaping your lips despite the tension in the air.
"My girlfriend," he murmured between kisses, his voice low and filled with desire. In that moment, the world beyond the locked door ceased to exist.
With skilled hands, he slipped the straps of your dress off your shoulders, letting them hang low and exposing your already hardened nipples. His eyes raked over you, taking in every detail as though he couldn't believe you were real.
"I'll never get tired of this," he whispered, his voice dripping with awe as his mouth latched onto your left breast, his tongue swirling against your sensitive skin.
A loud moan escaped you, echoing faintly in the private room, but the thundering bass of the music outside was loud enough to drown it out.
"Get loud for me, baby," he urged, his voice teasing and commanding all at once. "I wanna hear how beautiful you sound for me."
His hands slid to your back as he unzipped your dress, letting it pool around your ankles. Without hesitation, he positioned you on the sofa, one of your legs resting over his shoulder as his dark eyes zeroed in on your glistening core.
"Barely did anything, and you're already begging for me," he teased, slipping two fingers inside you with ease, the smirk on his lips widening when your sharp gasp filled the air.
"Haechan... please," you pleaded, your hands gripping the fabric of the couch as your body trembled beneath his touch.
"I'm not done, babe," he murmured, his fingers curling inside you, expertly hitting that sweet spot that made your back arch.
His tongue flicked out, meeting your needy clit as he lavished every inch of you with attention, his lips and tongue working in perfect harmony.
Your moans grew louder, your hips bucking against his mouth as your hands tangled in his hair. He groaned into you, the vibrations driving you wild as he watched you lose control, grinding yourself against him with abandon.
Haechan's free hand wandered to his hardened bulge, brushing over his strained cock that twitched with every sound you made. He bit back a growl, desperate to feel you fully but savoring every moment of your unraveling.
When your release finally washed over you, your scream of his name echoed in the room. Your body shuddered as your juices dripped down his chin, his tongue greedily lapping at everything you gave him.
As you lay there, trying to catch your breath, Haechan rose to his feet, unfastening his belt with swift hands and tugging his pants down to his ankles.
Your eyes widened at the sight of him, your lips parting in awe as you noticed his hard cock, his tip red and aggravated with precum.
He leaned down, lifting your legs to wrap around his waist before gripping your hair gently but firmly. His dark, hungry eyes bore into yours as he spoke, his voice dripping with authority. "You're going to take me right here, right now. I don't want you holding back those pretty moans of yours. Got it?"
You nodded quickly, barely able to speak before he lined himself up and thrust into you with a deep, powerful motion. A low growl escaped his lips as he buried himself to the hilt, his face buried in the crook of your neck.
"So fucking tight for me," he groaned, his voice rough in your ear. "Always so tight."
His pace started slow but deliberate, each thrust pulling moans from you that sent heat coursing through your entire body. His eyes locked onto yours as he noticed the outline of his protruding length against your stomach.
Grinning, he grabbed your hands and pressed them to it.
"You feel that, baby?" he said, his voice husky. "Soon, I'll fill you up right there. Is that what you want?"
Your sweat-slicked skin glistened as you bit your lip, nodding feverishly. "Yes! Please, Donghyuck, I want you to fill me up with every drop!"
His thrusts quickened, each one deeper and more relentless as his free hand trailed up to cup your throat. "That's my girl," he praised, his voice thick with desire as he watched you fall apart beneath him.
When your walls began to flutter and clench around him, his groan turned into a deep growl. "Donghyuck!" you cried out, your nails digging into his back as your release crashed over you.
He wasn't far behind. His hips stuttered as his grip tightened, his eyes rolling back as he spilled himself inside you, his body trembling with the force of his climax. Even as he came, he rocked his hips, ensuring every last part of him stayed buried deep within you.
For a moment, the room was silent except for the sounds of your labored breathing.
Haechan's forehead rested against yours as his hand moved to brush damp strands of hair from your face.
"Round two at my place?" he asked, a mischievous smile tugging at his lips.
Your laugh echoed softly as you cupped his face, your gaze filled with warmth. "Only if we manage to sneak away without getting caught."
"Say less." He grinned, standing to pull his pants back on before helping you dress. His hands lingered a little too long on your hips, his touch still filled with the passion of the moment.
Hand in hand, the two of you slipped out of the private room, sharing whispered laughs and conspiratorial smiles as you made your way through the club and out into the cool night air.
You felt completely free, the chaos of the night left behind as you escaped into a world where it was just you and him. Together, you'd already won a lifetime of love
‧˚⭒ taglist: @jaeminnanaaa17 @scoobysnackszoo @1800-jigglemywiggle @karmasbestie @cathamada @yoursyuno @oneeew @serenedreamscape @moryymor @yesohhsehun @dnihyuck @doyotint @kodasity @rainverry
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guys what if concerning dating history batsis did it with deathstroke.. or rose… WHAT IF HE’S HER SUGAR DADDY LMAO
OMG UR SO REAL FOR THIS THOUGH (Bruce is already getting grey hairs from this girl)
LIKE IMAGINE ME THIS ⬇️💗
Batsis and The Tale Of The Sugar Daddy (and gal pal Rose)
Warning: SLIGHT NSFW, canon dc violence, batfam shenanigans.
———————
Bruce: Listen I think it’s good that Batsis!Reader is financially independent now but where is she getting all this cash?
Tim mindlessly typing away: My theory is Roy got her pregnant and now Ollie has to bankroll them.
Damian: That’s ridiculous, they could have just came to father, Drake.
Dick who is sweating cause he knows why: Yeah..you’re probably right Tim..
Tim: What’s wrong?
Jason who is still agitated his sister is not only involved with his ex’s dad but also the ex: I’d tell you, but I was AND still am confused.
———————
- Batsis is definitely Rose’s awakening, she doesn’t care if she dated Jason that’s him fumbling not her.
- Batsis just started off as one of Rose’s friends when the masks were on, she didn’t know she was getting it on with her friends dad of all people.
- It’s difficult for anyone to really refute it when it comes to the age gap, yeah many think it’s gross but when they met she was the same age as Dick. (27-29) so if Bruce finds out not only can he not be argued with, Batsis will also bring up how his exes are just as bad.
- Not bc imagining Deathstroke who is just insanely soft on Batsis, say even if he gets her pregnant he isn’t going anywhere; Rose could use a little sister or brother ig. But y’all are careful, he knows better than to get a Wayne Family Heiress pregnant.
- I don’t write smut but Ik they are FREAKY, the one place they wouldn’t dare do it is Wayne Manor, he is cooked if they’re are caught there. He will have the Batman, Nightwing, Red Hood, Red Robin, The Batgirls, Robin, Batwoman, Signal and probs more on him at that point. These mfs will let Batsis’s exes know that’s how petty there are about this.
- Imagine waking up with Deathstroke and ur both barely clothed and outside his window is the entirety of the Batfamily, Arsenal, Three Green Lanterns, Zatanna, Wonder Woman, John Constantine, Booster Gold, Harley Quinn and his own daughter are queuing up for first dibs.
- Slade knows about your problem with some of your exes (cough cough Hal Jordan) and aims to help you by drowning you in jewellery and clothes, like that new faux fur coat and boots? Yeah he bought you that, that new pearl and gold necklace with your initials? Yep he got it. That new skirt that’s shoes the perfect amount of thigh? Yep, his. Like all these past flames and flings (HAL JORDAN) know you’re seeing someone.
- Always reminds you how mischievous you are for getting nasty with him whilst being a “figure of honour and importance”, which quite frankly pisses you off, you’ve slept with most of your dad’s colleagues god damn it! He loves that it makes you feisty.
- Rose is super jealous, and you definitely share a heart wrenching goodbye kiss before she wishes you goodbye, you almost went after her before remembering your dinner date tonight and if went well you’d be confident to let your father know of your relationship.
- If your a vigilante, Rose knows your secret identity (wether you’re batgirl or not), Your Sugar Daddy doesn’t know and you quite frankly would rather he not, you make him swear off the Wayne Family all together, but you feel guilty at not being able to protect them when the masks go on.
- We know Batsis has a limit when it comes to his work, so she will break it off eventually, leaving all the dinner dates, passionate nights and shopping behind. You know you make him very happy (mostly aroused) but happy, so he’s always a phone call away, you’re always down for the occasional fling, and your time with him will always never be forgotten, even if you did the right thing, which isn’t your style at all.
- He’s up there with John Stewart and Wally West with top five men you miss but probably wouldn’t date again for different reasons.
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IDK WHY THIS GOT ANGSTY THIS WAS MEANT TO BE FUNNY BUT WTH. Life goes on yall 😭🫶
#x reader#imagine#batfamily x reader#batfam#batfamily#batsis#batsis!reader#batfamily imagine#batfam x batsis#deathstroke#deathstroke x reader#slade wilson x reader#rose wilson#rose wilson x reader#batsis imagine#dc fanfic#dc x reader#dc x batsis#batsis x batfam#batfamily incorrect quotes#incorrect quotes#dc imagine#dc comics#bruce wayne x daughter!reader
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"Great! And as I said before, you're always welcome to go the one I go to whenever, even if getting there isn't as cool."
Travis could understand why Russell hadn't wanted to touch him with a barge pole. The guy gave off 'creep' vibes from a mile off, and from what he had heard, had been putting his hands all over his little brother just to skeeve him out more while he was captured.
"Yeah, I, when, when I first saw it all after the, the first attack happened, I, I was horrified," Russell said, "I can only imagine how, how much it, it hurt Lucien. But when he's ready, I'll be, I'll be helping put it, put it back into shape and just, just like Lucien, it'll come, come bouncing right, right back."
"That's the spirit, Custard," Travis said, "It'll be a double kick in the teeth to those pests."
Russell nodded. He still didn't want to leave Erica out as he had headed up towards the living part. Perhaps he would be able to find some fruit tea while making coffee for everyone else.
"Still, this whole situation is a shitstorm, and I think that's putting it mildly," Travis said, "I'm also glad Russell trusted me enough to ask me to come and lend some muscle."
Travis then reached down and started to get whatever was hiding under the clothes.
"Good call, Erica. There is something," Travis said, as he started to pull it away, "This is the part where it bites my hand off or something, isn't it?"
Travis then smirked. He could certainly tell the story while Ratchet was helpless, and so he began.
"Well, as you've heard, I have the nickname Pervert Mangler. See, there was this politician, well, his son, back in Boston. I just got out of prison, was going to turn my life around, and was just washing his office windows… he'd gone to get a drink or something, I don't remember, then I saw his laptop… "
Travis had to take a deep breath. Even now, that memory threatened to make his anger boil out of control.
"I knew I was going to prison again for what I was going to do, but I decided it was worth it for what he had on it. Made sure to send a picture to my sister-in-law, because I knew she would spread the word, reveal the truth. But then I broke that window, waited in his office for him to come back, and then went absolutely insane on him. I didn't even care if I ended up killing him. I didn't get to of course, but he probably wishes I had. Guy still has to piss through a tube even now."
And of course, he had been utterly disgraced by the public. Not even his father's money or reputation could save him.
"So while you're worth us, I better not be hearing anything about any disgusting comments or worse, trying to touch someone up," Travis warned.
Russell had been coming back down with a tray of cups. There was a cup of peach tea for Erica, and cup of coffee for everyone else.
"You didn't, you didn't tell him about the guy whose nuts you, you smashed with, with a can of beans?" Russell asked.
"I'm sure there'll be another time for that," Travis said, "If this story doesn't get the point across."
"Yay! I'll show you my gym!"
Despite the circumstances, Erica was always happy to make new friends, even more when they had the chance to bond over a common interest.
If anything, having to witness that while Travis searched him, added insult to the injuries Ratchet had sustained while Lucien wiped the sidewalk with him. He flinched when Erica reached over to poke the bruise that was forming on his face.
"No pressure! I can always go get my own drink." the elf replied, "And Lucien will feel better in a bit. He really cares about this place, these guys really hurt him when they destroyed it, even if he doesn’t want to show it."
That would have granted Ratchet a far more special treatment on its own, but she understood it wouldn't be very convenient to search him while taped to the ceiling.
"I’m okay." Erica replied with a shrug, "Like I said, a few bullets can't stop me and I'm coming up with new tricks— I think he's hiding something under his shirt."
Ratchet narrowed his eyes when Erica pointed. Dang it, he was counting on that.
She pushed the bucket closer. "So, what's the story you wanted to tell him?"
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#i wish i was a better brother to my sister#for so many years from 6 to the age of 18 or even 19 my sister were in horrible terms#hearing she has cervical cancer frightens me#i have finally gotten over my childhood and understand why she's was the way she was for lack of better wording#if I had known she took out her anger out on me cause her boyfriend was physically abusing her I would never held that grudge#shes changed a lot and isnt the toxic sister she was when i was growing up and shes even apologized to me#i hope they found it in its early stages and she will live#even if it means she can't have anymore kids#which would be so sad but at least she has 3 kids#i would hate a world where they don't have their mother....#all we can do is pray for her and hope she survives
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It's eternally a little funny whenever I see someone say something along the lines of 'everyone in Strive is so happy now! Everyone's stories are getting resolved! It'll be hard to make a new game when everyone's retired and living peacefully and resolved their problems' and then there's a haunted semi-sentient mecha corpse in the corner constantly screaming from being trapped in limbo
#nothing against the character reworking it's just funny in a fucked up way#everyone get a happy ending!*#*(except for you Romeo)#when I go back and rewatch Xrd vs Strive it's kinda jarring since you have a whole fleshed out character and now he's just kinda conceptual#like sure obviously he's dead but he himself is just sorta mentioned in passing by a couple of people#they didn't even go with the interpretation of 'oh his spirit passed on in AS/story mode'#and based on the character theme it really just reads as 'I'm trapped in neverending hell and my sister's presence is the only distraction'#half the cast is retiring and Romeo is reenacting I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream#idk I could be overthinking it but that whole segment of plotline bugs me in the weirdest way#wish it was more conclusive. wish it had more continuity from xrd. wish more than like two people in universe acknowledged it#how it's presented and how it's treated feels like it has a schism where things don't quite match up#bleh. at the very least there could have been a special intro with Axl#the ending of arcade mode is so abrupt it's almost a little silly#'ahh okay your brother's ghost/a lingering fragment of his soul is desperate to kill himself let's not touch on that much further'#maybe it'd be better if everyone had outtro dialogue like in xrd...?#guilty gear#bedman#delilah#op back on her bullshit
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When I first began reading/ watching OPM I use to really, really hate Tatsumaki. She was probably my least favourite character from the main cast for over a year. I tried to hide it in my posts but I despised her.
Even back then I knew why, Tatsumaki reminded me of my older sister who at the time I did not have a great relationship with. Not only would I say Tatsumaki has my sisters personality and motivations amplified to the extreme, but my sister was seen as ‘better’ by everyone around me, or at least it felt like that to me. My sister obviously isn’t an esper prodigy but she is seen as smarter, prettier, more likeable you know the drill. The Psychic sisters arc was probably one of my least favourite arcs unsurprisingly, I can understand Fubuki’s feelings towards her sister completely. You would think this would make me like Fubuki …but back then I didn’t like her that much either lmao.
The manga, especially the chapters for the monster association arc, did a great job of changing my perspective of Tatsumaki. I can see why she’s the way she is and even if I disagree with her methods I do like her character now, I prefer her to Fubuki. I used to hate webcomic counterpart as well but ever since the mangas MA and psychic sisters arc I like her webcomic self also.
The relationship improvement with my sister played a part in this as well. My sister wanted to make sure I could stand in my own two feet but she went about it the wrong way, which was what Tatsumaki also did. So understanding my sisters motivations and the manga chapters made me understand and like Tatsumaki more.
#the fact I’ve only scenes I’ve resonated with on tv or manga or whatever was the psychic sisters and the sisters scenes in fleabag#probably gives a good idea about my how my relationship wish my sister was a few years ago it’s not perfect now but it’s getting better#also I realised around two years ago some of the people I’m friends with remind me of my sister a lot#I don’t know if this post is more about Tatsumaki or my sister now#what I’m trying to say is my view on Tatsumaki is correlated to my relationship with my sister#im hope this doesn’t come across as me seeing Tatsumaki in my sister because it’s the other way around#also sisters in media I’ve been relationg to a lot lately like genshin chasca and her sister actually struck a cord#I usually can’t relate at all to shows or games ever#I feel like the post makes it sound like I only have one sibling I have a younger brother I’m closer with#I don’t see a lot of media with older sister younger brother ?#maybe I should watch modern family#one punch man#opm#Tatsumaki#i hope my point came across well#btw I want to say I always knew tats was trying to make Fubuki stand in her two feet it’s just I still hated her back then and didn’t#understand why she had to be so rude about it
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Still haven't messaged my mom back. And I don't think I'm going to.
#you know how they say time makes you look on the past with nostalgia and that's why elderly people think so fondly of past decades? not me#there are moments I look back on with nostalgia sure but the overwhelming feeling of looking back on my childhood is just whatever I do#wherever I go whatever happens that will not be my life again. my memory is long I made a promise to myself I intend to keep I don't forget#support you having your grandkids if their mother is deemed unfit yes. take the older two myself if it comes to it yes. move provinces to#live with you to look after the five of them together where you would be my only adult connection and there's a language barrier and I have#no work history and I'd be between five hours and nine hours away from any other connection I have answer's an absolute fucking no. I've#seen how you are with my sister how you were with my brother. who do you think they call when they've had enough of you? do you not#remember most of the beatings I took was because I was standing between you and my brother? of course not because according to you you#never did beat me but if you think I'm not aware that would turn on me again the second I'm no longer distant and just visiting if you#think you'd find nothing to complain about because you've built up this golden child ideal of me in your head and want to forget how it was#when I was actually in your care you are very very wrong. I remember. I know that inconveniences a lot of people who want to forget#unpleasant things about themselves. me too to be honest I have memories I wish I could erase but I can't especially with regard to my#sister. I defended my brother but not her. not enough. and it's probably why I give so much to her now more than I should because it's#enabling but it is what it is I guess. I won't use my memories against anyone just for the sake of it but I absolutely fucking will#to protect myself or others. you want a redemption arc without admitting to anything? keep being patient and kind towards#your grandchildren even if you end up having to take them and if you can't do it for all five of them then accept that it's better for the#older two to be with me. that's it. those are your options: the older two are with me so you only have to look after the younger three or#you need to buckle down and learn from your past mistakes to look after the five of them and all that is *if it even comes to that* which#as things are it's not in danger of that! it was a regular fucking visit to monitor the situation that's all; they're not getting taken#literally every time she freaks out about something it's a 50/50 chance it's actually something or she's invented a completely#twisted version of events
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A startling amount of you guys seem to be devoid of all empathy
#I know anonymity and this is the internet#so people say things they would never say irl#but a horrifying percentage of you also bare the banner of Christ as you spew hate#and like I know I am not a perfect representative and that I am just as guilty of wishing ill on others#or thinking someone deserves it#but like my brothers and sisters we must be better
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I should fucking kill myself
#I have this anger and dislike towards my little brother that’s totally unwarranted like he’s 10 it’s just my issues#n whenever I feel his hatred towards him I want to gut myself like#it’s not his fault that my moms a better mom for him n that he’s not scared of her#It’s not his fault that my dads sober and present for him#it’s not his fault that my older brother is a good brother to him n has never hurt him#it’s not his fault he’s not scared of telling someone he’s hurt or of getting food#it’s not his fault he parrots all of my parents insane conservative views#but I still hold so much anger and resentment#When I look at him I see him getting all the things I never got and being free of the traumas I went through#and I know it’s good and I’m happy he’s grown up in a safer environment but I’m so angry that I didn’t have those parents#and I know he’s also missing so many things I got#But it fucking hurts seeing how loved and safe he is and wishing I had been that innocent at that age#like when he’s fighting with my mom it’s over school work n video games n then he thinks he can talk shit ???#when I was fighting with my mom it was bc she came home from work in a rage#when I was mad at my dad it was because he got drunk n came home n yelled at my mom until she was crying in a corner then left#When I was screaming at my older brother it’s because I was tired of him hurting me not because he called me a name#I’m a horrible sister to him and I hate it because when he was a baby I was so fiercely protective of him and so happy to be his sister#I watched his shows with him and kept him entertained when my parents got bad n I promised myself I’d take care of him the way I never was#but I failed n now I can barely stand being around him#like I’m such a good sister to my sister but that’s it#n it makes me feel worse about my relationship w my brother bc I know I can be better but I’m just a horrible jealous bitch who should die#screaming
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I haven't had much time to write with my new study schedule and family things, and when I do have time I have to wade through a sludge of doubts and fears about my ability to write prose at all, and when I manage to push that aside I often hit locked doors with spoon-shaped keyholes and have no keys for them.
It's frustrating, but I eke out what words I can while working on improving my writing conditions any way I can.
Then I finally have the feeling I can pull off writing some poetry, something I feel even more scared of more often than prose -- but also something I know I won't be able to leave unfinished as easily as prose and will be more likely to create something complete -- and I get a spark of hope.
And I go to compose the poem and my brain hands me what can only be described as an all-emoji recipe for fried eggs and ice cream. Which is not, as far as I know, a poem. Or even the pieces to make a poem. It's simply. Emojis. Vibrant and colorful and wholly unhelpful.
Thank you, brain, but next time I'd like to actually make a poem or story. Please.
#writing#sort of#writing meme#also sort of#not entirely#sonder speaks#I've been studying for slightly over a month#but I don't adapt to these things quickly#I'm the “can only change one thing at a time very slowly” type of autistic I'm afraid#and the balance between input and output of media has been off balance#also my baby niece was born and my sister can't come to our house anymore because the baby is too young to meet a pack of dogs#so I lose out on study time writing time and other home-only activity time when family night happens at my sister's house now#which is fine because I love my sister and my brother in law and my niece#and being at their place is fun#but also the lost time#it kind of gets to me when I just#don't have time to do everything I need and want to do#which is how time and living creatures work I know but it still frustrates me#also yes I know it could've been one of the people living in my brain and not me/my brain that provided emojis#I know there are potential other culprits#but it's simpler to say it was my brain and it all comes from that source anyway#I wish I could write#oh and the brain emojis included#🟨⚪️🧊🧂💨🟧🍏🥶#more or less#which is as mentioned unhelpful#so amy types of things#so badly#I need to take better control of these barriers and issues
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in the midst of a little depressive episode at the moment I fear and it's causing me to Ponder... in a weird way I'm almost grateful. like this is UNBELIEVABLY better than it used to be, even as much as it sucks in the moment. I wish I could go back to find myself at twelve years old hiding out in the school toilets and tell them that as long as we stick it out for long enough then one day the outsize bad emotions will be triggered by actual definable events and they'll be a noticeable change from our baseline. I'm not ✨recovered✨ and I don't know if I ever will be - I think I might have spent too many developmental years creating terrible patterns and associations to be able to straighten it all out - but it's Better and I'm able to know that it can continue to get better, too. and that's fucking huge.
#fay gets uncomfortably personal on her video game blog. NOT SORRY.#idk it's just crazy to think about#I really struggle to tap into this space enough to remember when I'm not actively in it#but I was SO FUCKING SICK back then. I was a child. and I was so fucking ill. I didn't know how young I was and I didn't realise how#disturbing it would feel down the line#(obviously. you don't lie down on the road in the middle of the night thinking 'I can't wait to suddenly remember this moment#in several years so it can become a sticking point in my psyche')#but like. that's my brother's age that's my sister's age I work with kids that age and it's so fucking young! and I'm so young now!#and I bet in five years I'll be going 'what a small little child... crazy' all over again#but like. idk. I was SO ILL. and I don't think it's like people say they thought they'd be dead by a certain age#it was a possibility for me but not an inevitability#but I don't think that I could have foreseen being better#in such a material way. you know. like I can't imagine myself ever fully healthy#or as close as anyone can get. I've had all this shit for so long. the idea of not carrying it anymore is honestly unappealing#like what would I even do without it. who would I be. how could that possibly happen#but this shit is BELIEVABLE. it's not gone it's just better and when it crops up I can deal#and I wish I could take the me of back then by the shoulders and say THIS IS NOT FOREVER!!!!!!!#ride it out long enough and you'll learn to live with it!!!!!!!!#it's just. really fucking huge. and I am so grateful#peace and love on planet earth!!!!
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once when my dad was really horrible to me I DONT EVEN REMEMBER WHAT HE DID but i do remember he got me so much moshi monsters stuff as an apology ☹️ and i remember being SO CONFUSED. AND I STILL AM. because he was always so so so so so horrible to me when i was a kid i think he was just frustrated bc my mum was never around to deal with me so he took it out on me but i URRHRGRHRHHHGYGY i miss being a child but also i dont I MISS IT SO MUCH but my mum was always at work and i was convinced my dad hated my guts but whatever its fine. i still remember so clearly him asking me to come up to his room abd i thought i was in troubke but he just gavw me so so so so so much stuff there was so much stuff i remember there was a tin full of moshi trading card packs and he just hugged me and he cried on my shoulder and i had no idea what was foing on or what he was sorry for
#txt#i wish i knewwweeehehhhgughh :(#personal#extremely#i kind of hate my brother and sister because he was never as mean to them as he was to me#which is horrible of me because i should be happy they were/are treated better#but im so jealous#man#you think you know daddys wrath 😞 you dont#i still love him though#i used to hate him so much#but hes nice now#YAY
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guys remind me to watch la bamba later
#nicha said i should watch it#also nichas my beat friend thank gd for nicha. shes like the only irl person ive talked abt it with#and shes like . no you arent overreacting r you crazy . which makes me feel a LOT better#im so sad shes leaving thi :[[ she keeps telling me t move t great wolf lodge with her JFNFJFBF#and she said that if i ever need a ride to a job interview or a drs appt or anything like that t just ask. shes my bestiee#she has a yojnger sister my age (18 (nicha is 25 BTW) but her sister sucks so nicha literally said I wish you were my sister instead.#common kamille w. she also said im her favorite and i get all rhe stuff on her cart when she leaves ^-^ yay#but tbh. i might frrr look into great wolf lodge bc their starting pay is $18 dollars an hour#plus its. hotel work. which is wayy easier than apt cleaning if im being fully honest#and allegedly its closer to my house sooo...#plus. nicha fiona and i thinkk nee? r all leaving? which leaves me dee and brenda ? brother i gtg im not gonna be one of 3 housekeepers.#ik theyd hire more but i just got here i cant be like the 3rd most senior housekeeper 💀#sry 4 doxxing myself. potentially#oh also the pay here is 16 dollars an hour with literally no room for growth#brenda is housekeeping lead and she makes like. 17.#nee i think has been here almost since the place opened and she still only makes like 16.... which is insane#so ya i might look into gwl.#im mainly scareddd abt getting rides bc rn marian gives me a ride...#n like she could probably still give me a ride in the morning if im sooo niceys but likee. yk. how would i get home at da end of the day#ik i should just suck it up and ask my roommates bc kate is rly nice and prolly wouldnt mind but. gets scared... she also works closing#shifts so she wouldnt be able t bring me home. lily works a ton of different shifts so its not rly a reliable thang so i cant ask her#plus.everything. and then hal . yeah obvious reasons hes not giving me a ride LOL
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#ugghhhhh#cw vent#my sister is currently venting to me via text about our mom and i’m just like :| i hate it. i hate that they’ve been arguing so much#recently. my mom is being completely unreasonable and her brother died so i get thats playing a factor but shes like driving me crazy too#and i just. i don’t know there are things my sister’s doing that i disagree with and stuff but i just#wish i had a family that got along and stuff. tired of always being their only outlet#now i’m crying on the balcony like an idiot because i don’t even have my own room to cry in#my religious aunt is coming this sunday so hopefully ...#i can talk to her about it and she can reason with my mom. better than i could at least#💭#i miss my dad so much and i wish childe were here ...#my dad doesn't really get. like. how i really feel but at least he tries ... even if 90% of the things he says arent helpful
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it’s so funny how much kids seem to like me when i struggle so much understanding the words they’re saying if they’re really little and i’m BETTER at interacting with them than i used to be after all these years with my nephew and nieces but still like. kinda awkward
i like them too, to be clear, kids are the fucking BEST even if i don’t want them for myself. but i’m always just kind of stunned when kids attach themselves to me seemingly so easily
#and it's just like?? most of the kids i interact with?#started with my nephew when he was much younger i'd guess not long after we met and started spending time together#and my older niece is much the same way when she comes over she wants to take me around with her#their younger sister not so much but she's still p exclusively attached to her parents it seems#so maybe in a year or two for her#and then my godson sure bc i've gone theirs a couple times a year every year for giving him birthday and christmas presents#but his siblings all get excited to see me too (sidebar his younger sister was dressed so cute today and i'm like#it was not like that when i was 10 oh my god)#and the youngest is more shy in general i think but he was v shy of me when i was over just a few months ago#and today we played tossing coins back and forth to each other and he had the biggest smile on his face#and he wanted to show me some toys in his room#and then he had one of those blankets that's also like a sort of lil costume of a monster#and he asked me to put it on him and then i did the whole pretending he's the monster that's gonna get me#but i was just like omg where did this turnaround come from you didn't wanna interact with me a few months ago#anyway kids are fascinating and also so fun and i love them i love them#i just wish i was better at the play stuff my brother apparently loves doing the make believe stuff with his daughter#which doesn't surprise me he's got a good imagination but yeah i'm always just like. idk how to do this#tbf i don't think kids really notice/care as long as you're engaging with them and all but still i just wish i was better at it#especially bc like if i WERE...working with kids might be fun but idk#personal
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#thinking abt that one time my sister told me she resented me for being born and stealing her spot as youngest daughter#i miss my dad#i miss my dad so much#i miss him#i miss him so much#vent tw#vent#i miss him i wish he was alive#everything would be better if he wasn't dead#i hate my brother#i hate my sisters#i miss my dad so much its not even real#i fucking hate tiffany#i was going to be okay#and now im not#:(#i miss my dad so much :(#my family life is so fucked up#im entirely fucking alone#my mom is 61 and she has 20 years max i fucking feel like#she smokes so much#i dont even like my mom im just so scared of her dying
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