#i will not be even remotely normal about this movie for the next 8 months

[brandwhorestarscream]

NSFW, kinda spoilers for TF1

No because I'm still not over the whole "Megatron and Starscream's whole relationship is actually just really intense foreplay/bdsm" becoming CANON. Like??? Megatron literally throws him down in front of everyone and what is Starscream's reaction but to dramatically go, "Yes! Hit me! Hit me harder!"

Like???? I'm not complaining but a masochism-exhibitionist thing right in the middle of my transformers movie was not what I was expecting lmfao

Megastar probably had hot steamy evil villain sex shortly after the banishment, in the spot that would eventually become the new decepticon capital, in front of everybody 😌 Starscream swaggers up to him and goes, "Hit me again, big bot. I can take it~ ❤️" and the elite trine cheer him on like,

"YEAH THAT'S OUR TRINE LEADER!"

"Get it, Starscream! Get it!"

Seekers are a filthy, rowdy, overly-sexual bunch, and there's nothing like a good public fragging to raise spirits. If Starscream wants to publicly ride thick gladiator champion spike in full view of everyone in celebration of Sentinel Prime's death, you can bet your ass Skywarp and Thundercracker are gonna be supportive

[spencersstrawberryjello]

Shitty Slasher Film (Spencer Reid + gn!MC - platonic)

Summary: SPOILERS FOR SEASON 8 (and minor season 7 spoilers but I figure if you’ve seen season 8 you’ve probably seen season 7 already lmao) MC and Spencer decide to go see a slasher film, but it takes a turn for the worse when the killer begins to stalk his victim. 

Content: Hurt/Comfort (because literally what else do I write at this point)

Warnings: Descriptions of violence, depressive thoughts, and swearing

MC’s name and pronouns: Neither explicitly mentioned

Word Count: 2285

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The plan was simple.

We were going to see a new horror movie in the theaters - it seemed similar to a slasher film that Morgan, Garcia, Reid and I had seen like six or seven months ago, so I didn’t think anything of it when we booked the tickets. Morgan and Garcia couldn’t make it tonight, unfortunately, but we still elected to go on our own, thinking it would be a fun little outing. That was, until the film started.

The lights came up on a woman, walking through a back alley alone, at night. Typical. I even glanced over at Spencer and rolled my eyes a bit, and he grinned at the stereotypical horror movie trope.

She died, of course, and for the first half of the movie I genuinely thought it was going to be exactly what we assumed. We were laughing at the ridiculousness of it all, with the stupid special effects and the subpar acting. But everything went off the rails after the first half of the movie.

The killer had revealed his primary target, his endgame, and - much to my horror - he had begun to stalk her.

Scenes of her creating a disguise, moving houses, throwing away her phone, spun a dark web that I didn’t ever want to think about. But I had more pressing things to worry about than my fear at a movie that was literally intended to make you scared.

I glanced over at Spencer, and I could tell that his breathing had picked up. His hands were gripping the arms of the chair, knuckles as white as his face had turned. I put a hand over his, and his attention snapped to me.

“Hey, are you alright?” I asked him. It was a stupid question, and one I already knew the answer to, but it was the first thing I could think to say. He looked like he was weighing his options for a moment before he shook his head.

“Do you want to leave?” I followed. He nodded, eyes wild, and we quickly grabbed our bags and left, just as the stalker had pulled a gun on his victim. Spencer took one last look at the screen, watching with wide eyes as the victim begged for her life. It was like a trainwreck; he couldn’t take his eyes off the movie, and I couldn’t take my eyes off him as the stalker pulled the trigger, and the woman crumpled to the ground. He practically jumped out of his skin when the gunshots fired, and I grabbed his arm to usher him out.

I didn’t realize the full extent of his panic until we made it out of the theater, bursting through the doors into the significantly brighter lights of the hallway. He immediately sat down on the couch near the doors, head in his hands, breathing rapidly.

“Ok, you’ve gotta breathe, Reid. You’ve gotta breathe, alright? In through your nose, out through your mouth, can you do that?” I adjusted my breathing to fit the pattern, and saw that he had started to slow his as well. “Good, ok… we can sit here for as long as you need to, just focus on your breathing.”

He gave me an almost imperceptible nod, continuing to breathe slowly before lifting his head from his hands. His eyes were red, and it was clear he’d been trying to fight off tears.

“Reid, I’m so sorry -”

It was at that moment that he cut me off with a hug, tucking his head in the crook of my neck as I felt his body lightly shake with sobs. After a second I hugged him back, not used to physical affection from him, but not opposed as long as he was ok with it.

“It reminded you too much of Maeve, didn’t it?” I asked, trying to ensure that the story I had in my head was correct. He nodded, his breath coming in short gasps again, and I hugged him a bit tighter. “Reid, I’m so sorry, I never would’ve suggested this movie if I’d known the turn the story was going to take.”

He shook his head, sucking in deep breaths before finally attempting to speak. “No, no, it’s ok, I know that you wouldn’t have done this on purpose. It’s just…”

He trailed off, but I knew what he was trying to say. “I was there that day, Reid. I know how much she meant to you.”

“The girl in the movie kind of looked like her. You know? Same hair, same face shape… when I saw the fear in her eyes, all I could imagine was Maeve, terrified, with a gun to her head. The woman I love - loved. The woman I loved. Scared, and alone.”

“Oh, Reid… you know it’s not your fault, right? You did everything you could to save her.”

“No. No, I didn’t. I should’ve closed my eyes, I should’ve tackled Diane - hell, I should’ve shot that bitch the minute I walked into the room! Instead I stood there. I stood there while the woman I loved died in front of me, and I didn’t do anything to stop it.”

“Spencer.” I put my hands on his shoulders, pulling back from the hug to look into his eyes. “You absolutely cannot blame yourself for this. What happened to Maeve was horrible, but it was not your fault. And you can’t live your life with that on your conscience.”

“Maybe I deserve to.” His voice was soft as he tucked his head back into the crook of my neck, and I put my arms around him, one hand lightly rubbing his back. My heart broke for the man in my arms - my best friend - as he sniffled, a few stray tears still trickling down his face.

“You don’t deserve to live with that kind of guilt, Spencer. Guilt for something you didn’t even do. And I’m so, so sorry that you feel that way. And I’m so sorry about what happened.”

“Sorry doesn’t make it go away,” He argued, his voice muffled by the fabric of my t-shirt, “Sorry doesn’t bring her back.”

I heard his voice hitch when he said it, and I held him a bit tighter. “I know it doesn’t.”

He was silent for a moment before he spoke again, his voice thick with tears begging to be released. “I just wish I could bring her back.”

It was as if saying it broke something in him, and I felt his body shake as he cried again, consumed by grief and guilt unlike anything I could ever imagine. He was usually so closed off about his emotions that having him crying in my arms was a rare occurrence, even after years of friendship. The last time he was like this was after Emily’s… “death,” and even that wasn’t near as intense.

I wasn’t sure how long we sat on that bench, the orange lights of the movie theater hallway creating a strange liminal sensation as I held Spencer, finally releasing the emotions he’d clearly been pushing away since Maeve’s death.

Eventually, he stopped crying, his breathing returning to something close to normal, and he pulled away from me, his eyes red from tears.

“I’m sor -”

“Nope, do not even start to apologize. There’s nothing to apologize for.”

He closed his mouth, contemplating saying something else for a second before nodding, hugging me again.

“Thank you.”

“Of course, Reid. Do you want to go back to my place? We can order a pizza, and watch a movie - something we know this time. If you need to be alone, I understand, but -”

He shook his head. “I’d like that.”

“Good,” I sucked in a deep breath, trying to steady my own breathing after everything that just happened, “Good. Are you ok to walk to the car?”

“Yeah… I’m not sure how talkative I’m going to be tonight though…” He kind of trailed off, clearly drained, but not wanting to be alone.

“I understand; you know there’s no expectations with me, Reid. If you want to just wrap yourself up in a blanket and eat junk food, I get it. I just want to be there, to make sure that you’re ok.”

He gave me a small smile, and I grinned, grabbing his hand to help him off the bench. We made our way out to my car, and I climbed in, starting it before turning on the radio.

Spencer was pretty much silent the entire drive back to my apartment, the noise in the car mostly consisting of the music and my less than stellar singing. When we finally pulled into the complex, we headed upstairs to my place.

“I’m gonna order the food. Do you wanna find something on Netflix you like?” I asked as I unlocked the door. He nodded, and I threw my keys on the kitchen counter, putting in the pizza order on my computer. I saw him grab a blanket from the basket in the living room, wrapping it around his shoulders and plopping down on my couch.

I expected to return to the living room to see whatever movie we were watching cued up on the TV. Instead, I saw Spencer, staring at the wall across from him, remote untouched on the coffee table.

“Hey,” I sat down next to him, gently putting one hand on his shoulder, “Is there anything else you want to talk about?”

He was silent for a moment, and I could see the mental battle he was fighting. Eventually, he spoke, his voice barely above a whisper.

“I’m afraid… I’m afraid that if I allow myself to grieve, if I allow myself to think about what happened, I won’t be able to stop. It’s been almost four months, I thought the pain would be gone by now. But it isn’t, it’s… I just miss her. I miss her so much.”

“I know, Reid. I know.”

He leaned into me, and I didn’t hesitate to wrap my arms around him, the thoughts of pizza and a movie completely abandoned in my mind. Instead, all of my attention was on Spencer as he spoke again.

“On the last case, Rossi talked to me. I told him that I wasn’t sleeping because whenever I did, I would dream of her. Of Maeve. And everytime I saw her, I felt nothing but relief flooding my mind. I told him how she would always ask me to dance, and how I always said no. I never even got to hold her when she was alive, and I was scared that if I gave into the fantasy, I would be lost forever,” He took in a shaky breath before he continued, “And he said I should. He said, ‘just let it happen, Spencer.’ So I did. I danced with her, I held her, and when I woke up, she was all I could think about. The way it felt to wrap my arms around her, the way her head fit perfectly into the crook of my neck while we danced. It took another day before I could think about anything but her, before I could stop wallowing in my grief enough to function. And since that night, I haven’t allowed myself to give into the fantasy again, the fantasy of having her back. I think… I think that if I let it happen again, I won’t be able to come back from it. It’ll just consume me.”

“Spencer…” I trailed off, unsure of what to say. He just shook his head, telling me I didn’t need to say anything as we sat there on my couch in silence. He wasn’t crying, he hadn’t cried since we left the theater. He was just… hollow. Everything that he’d been trying to repress - to compartmentalize - had finally caught up to him, in the form of a shitty slasher movie that we’d gotten cheap tickets to see.

I held him tighter, wishing that I could figure out something to say to comfort him, to take away his pain. But I knew there was nothing I could do. Nothing I could do but just be there.

“Have you ever considered talking to someone? Like, not someone from the team - a professional?” I asked.

“I’ve thought about it. But… we’re experts in human behavior, you know? What’s a therapist going to be able to tell me that I can’t already profile myself?”

“Well, it might be helpful to have a licensed professional to talk to about this stuff. Someone who can actually give you advice on how to handle your emotions. Because as much as I am absolutely here for you no matter what, I’m afraid I’m not great at mental health advice.”

“Yeah… maybe.” He sounded dubious about the idea, and while I wanted to encourage him further, I didn’t want to push him today. So I settled for just gently rubbing his back as he laid in my arms, staring at the wall. Eventually, the doorbell rang, and I got up to get the pizza, bringing it back into the living room and setting it down on the coffee table. By now, he’d sat up, the blanket still pulled around his shoulders, but at least a bit more present.

“Thank you,” He said, for the second time that day. I just smiled at him.

“Of course. I love you, Reid. And I’m always here, whatever you need.”

“I love you too,” He gave me a small smile back before turning his attention to the coffee table, “But I also love food - I’m starving.”

I laughed as I handed him a plate, joining him on the couch as we both dug in.  

[dianapana]

SH Day 3- Addicted to your touch

Day 3 – Addicted to your touch Separation Anxiety

WARNING: MENTAL ILLNESS

Disclaimer: I am not a therapist, the advice I gave in this piece might be very faulty, please take it with a grain of salt.

Modern AU, OOC

@sasuhinamonth

It all started small, when one day Sasuke announced that he’d be gone for 2 weeks due to work, the news alone made Hinata’s heartache but she smiled and wished him good luck on the project and a safe trip. Each day the feeling of missing him would grow and grow and grow until it was too big for her body to contain, and the feeling turned to pain. Her longing made her physically sick by the end of the second week.

The next stage was composed of excessive calls and texts, Hinata constantly needed to know where he was, what he was doing, whenever he’d take too long to reply the longing would come back and she’d either sink into sadness or lose herself to anger, both feelings she had not experienced much since dating Sasuke. Whenever he’d reply after a longer break, she’d ask him to come over to her house and stay the night.

That was the case on August 3rd. Sasuke came straight to her house after a long day at the office and Hinata ran to hug him, all of the negative feelings almost forgotten the moment she laid her eyes on him. His touch alone made all of her worries disappear. That was the feeling of home, in his arms.

They spent the night normally, eating dinner while watching a movie, changing and going to bed because they both had work in the morning. The issue came with the sunrise, for Hinata refused to let him leave. She cried and begged and screamed the moment he brought up work, she tore his shirt apart reasoning that he couldn’t go to work without one. The moment the white fabric hit the ground; silence fell over the room. Both of them were shocked, unable to speak due to her outburst of emotions.

Her cried aggravated, she fell to her knees and crawled to where he was, hugging his waist, apologizing over and over again. Sasuke was in deep thought, remembering all the small signs over the past month and a half. It hurt him to think that he had hurt her in any way to drive her to this moment, he patted her hair lovingly, took a deep breath and said in a broken voice “I think there’s something wrong Hina”

She looked at him with big round eyes, they were glossy and red, she blinked and looked down at the floor. “There might be…” Sasuke picked her up by her armpits and placed her in his lap, continuing to run his hand through her hair. He continued doing so until she calmed down and fell asleep, her emotions must have exhausted her. He didn’t move her from his lap for fear of waking her up, however, he picked up his phone from the nightstand and send Itachi a message telling him that he will not be going to work, he proceeded to text Kurenai as well informing her of Hinata’s absence at work too.

He spent the following few hours reading about similar situations, which mostly led to the same piece of advice, that a specialist was needed. So, he went on to search for therapists in Konoha, texting them all, asking whether any of them were free that day, two of them didn’t reply, another one was full for the week and could only see them next Wednesday, thankfully the last one agreed to meet with them after closing hours at 8:30.

Having all of that plan, all he needed to do was find a way to approach the topic when talking to Hinata, she had to agree that paying a visit to therapy would do them both good. Hinata had been asleep for about two hours now, so Sasuke took the liberty to move her onto her side of the bed and go to the kitchen to make some food for when she’d get up.

He managed to make scrambled eggs and toast and was about to go and wake her up when a cry of distress came from their room. He hurried to her side, Hinata was holding onto his pillow on the verge of tears.

“You weren’t here when I woke up” Her voice was meek and trembling. “I could hear movement in the kitchen, I knew you were there. So why, why does your absence hurt this much, despite me knowing you are here?”

He wished he had the answer, but he didn’t. He moved closer and sat on the edge of the bed, cupping her face with one hand, slowly brushing the skin under her eye with his thumb. Sasuke leaned in slowly to hiss her nose, cheek, forehead and finally the corner of her mouth. “I think to find out why, we might need some help from the outside” he closed his eyes and sighed, his breath fanning over her lips. “I talked to a man named Iruka, he’s a therapist and agreed to meet with us later today, would you be open to this idea?”

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Hinata looked at him, searching his eyes and expression for any malice or negative feelings, but there was none, his openness and desire to help led her to agree to his plan, maybe they did need help.

“From what you’ve told me, this is a severe case of separation anxiety,” Iruka said, he looked kind and bore no ill feelings, Hinata had been afraid of the judgmental look he’d give her after hearing about her actions, but his eyes remained warm and understanding. “This usually manifests itself in small children, they are afraid to part from their caregivers even for a moment. In certain cases, it is believed it could appear in pregnant women as well, and usually the caregiver is their partner. Is there any possibility of this being true?”

Both Sasuke and Hinata’s eyes opened wider at the word pregnant, there was most certainly a possibility of that. They were always careful while having sex, however, Hinata was not on birth control, for they affected her badly whenever she took them as a teen so their method of contraception were condoms alone. There’s always the possibility of one breaking, a faulty one, or just them being part of the 0.01% of the population for which condoms did not work perfectly.

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“I suggest you take a pregnancy test as well. As I mentioned, this is known to happen now and again so do not worry too much; however, this anxiety can affect you negatively” Iruka continued while looking at Hinata “the best way to deal with this is steady growth. In the early stages constant contact is preferred. Think of this as building up trust once again. Constant reassurance is important, always keeping promises, separation needs to happen slowly over time; from constant touch to simply being in the same room but at a safe distance, then being in separate rooms, then Hinata being alone but in a familiar and comfortable space for short periods of time. Of course, this process takes months. For some women the anxiety dies down with the birth, for others in continues after but through steady built of trust it can disappear”

They followed Iruka’s advice and went to Hinata’s gyno the next day and Iruka’s assumption proved to be true, Hinata was indeed pregnant in week 7. They were currently in the first stage of their trust-building, being in the same room, always touching. Hinata sat in his lap while they watched a movie, they held hands whenever they were outside, they’d keep bumping feet under the table as they ate. Sasuke had basically moved into her apartment, neither of them went to work. Sasuke was able to do most of his job remotely, however, Hinata applied for medical time off. Everything was going great, Hinata no longer experienced that painful longing, however, her pregnancy turned out to be a quite difficult one, as soon as they found out she was indeed pregnant, her morning sickness started, she had constant back pain and her appetite was very volatile. They’d often wake up in the middle of the night and drive around the city to find one of her cravings. During a particularly bad night 2 months after, her craving for watermelon in the winter proved difficult, to add to the issue her back pain was excruciating so she could not stay in the car for however long it would take them to find watermelon.

“Do you think…you would be all right if you stayed here and I went to find it for you…?” they had barely moved on from the ‘always touching’ stage, the process was slow but it was there.

“I…don’t know…”

“What do you want me to do Hina? You can’t even sit up properly, being in the car for maybe an hour would we awful, but being here alone would too…but it’s unwise to not follow your cravings either” He was spiralling, the situation was stressful and all he wanted was to be able to help her, he wanted to take her pain away, he wanted to give her everything she’d ever want and more.

“I think, I will be fine” Hinata finally said after thinking for a bit longer. Almost in slow motion, he nodded, ‘ok, ok, ok’ he murmured to himself as he put his winter coat over his pyjamas and stood on the bed to put his boots on. “I’ll go find you watermelon, ok? I will be back as soon as I can. I love you” he kissed her cheek and then the top of her head. She smiled and waved, but the moment his back turned to her, her smile wavered. Would she really be ok…?

Sasuke ran down the stairs to the car, he wanted to be away for as little as possible. He pulled out of the driveway and sped up as much as possible. Firstly, he’d look at the local non-stop supermarket, at the ‘exotic’ or ‘out of season’ shelf, if it wasn’t there he’d go to the local Korean market and buy some watermelon flavoured things, just in case there was nothing else anywhere; before he could think of where he’d go next his phone rang. Seeing Hinata’s name he answered immediately.

“come back…please” she was trying not to cry, he could hear it. He did an illegal U-turn and sped even more towards their apartment “I’m coming, I’ll be there in 5 minutes” Hinata replied with an ‘ok’ however she didn’t hang up, she needed to at least be on the line with him. Sasuke didn’t hang up either, not when we pulled into the driveway, not when he stopped the car, nor when he ran up the stairs. He only hung up when Hinata was in his arms.

“I’m so sorry, I thought I could, but you left and I…” she was sobbing so hard it was even difficult to understand her. “It’s ok, it’s not your fault, we moved too fast. Iruka said it’s slow. It’s no problem Hina, we can just start over” If her constantly touching him was what made her feel safe, he’d hold her close until she was ready. No more rushing of things. Once Hinata calmed down, Sasuke called Itachi.

“I’m sorry to wake you up but I need some help…could you look for some watermelon?”

[inlovewithhisblueeyes]

The Great Jewish Cook-off

Pairing: Walter Marshall x Jewish Reader

Prompt: Latkes from the 8 Days of Henry-kkah

Word Count: ~1.8k

Warnings: Mentions of sadness and depression in regards to the holidays and the current pandemic.

A/N: Happy Hanukkah. I wanted to get this done for the first day, but my depression reared it’s ugly head. I decided to start off this challenge by writing for my favorite bear. I’m feeling a bit homesick due to the fact I’m normally back home with my family at this time of year. So this piece reflects a bit of that.

A delicate blanket made of snowflakes had nestled itself over the streets of Minneapolis. Normally by the time Walter was evicted from his office at the station, this picturesque scene would have been turned into mucky slush. However, with the impending snowstorm on top of the current stay at home order, the snowy streets remained relatively undisturbed. Walking towards his car, he took in the sight before him; it was different to be caught up in it rather than watching this winter wonderland from his office window.

The tired detective let out a groan as he clamored into his freezing car. The sun was just beginning to set and bright oranges and reds danced across the wintery whiter stage that was this city. He quickly turned on the ignition and peeled out of his parking spot, eager to be out of the cold and in the arms of his girl. The ride home was rather uneventful due to the denizens of this icy city finally listening to restrictions set in place. At least, that’s what he had hoped. The amount of times Walter had been called to break up a party in the past few months would have astounded him had he not been dealing with humanity’s worst of the worst in homicide.

In addition, Faye had been participating in remote learning, which allowed her to blow up his phone throughout the day. It was bad enough that he had be relegated from homicide to deal with those covidiots, but having a stir-crazy teenager attached to her phone when she should be paying attention to her classes was surely wearing him down. He went from having a phone that could stay charged for a few days straight to having to charge it nightly due to his daughter’s antics. In hindsight, it was better than her spending her ample free time messaging strangers online. All he wanted now was a quiet night at home with his girlfriend; perhaps, cuddled up on the couch with some wine and watching whatever silly holiday movie piqued their interest.

The first thing he noticed as he pulled into the driveway was that your car was parked out front, yet the lights were off in the house. It was still rather light out so it wouldn’t have been the biggest deal in the world if Walter wasn’t a cop. Nevertheless, it caused the hairs on the back of his neck to stand up as he exited the vehicle. The curly haired man quickly removed his gun from his holster and began to walk towards the front door. With a swift turn of the door knob, he could tell that you had once again left the door unlocked. This was a continued point of contention in the relationship as the horrors of that dreadful day a few years back were ever present in his mind.

Granted, the two of you had not even met yet and most of the details of that brutal case were never to be disclosed to the public. Walter carefully opened the door and stepped into the house. He heard the crackle of the fire in the next room and quickly ascertained that his worst fears hadn’t come true. Sliding his gun back into the holster, Walter quietly toed off his boots and hung his jacket up in the closet. Then he took off his mask and set it on the table by the door. His sock covered feet padded against the hard wooden floor of the entryway as he made his way towards the living room. The electric fire was the only source of light in the room and he could scarcely make your sleeping form out on the couch.

It wasn’t like you to be asleep this early, but ever since the world shut down, things have been rather different around here. Walter silently leant down to give you a kiss on the cheek and to check to make sure you weren’t suffering from a fever. Grabbing his phone from his back pocket, he made his way over to the kitchen to get started on dinner. Just as he was about to go through the sea of texts from Faye, the detective noticed a faint smell of burnt food. He set his phone on the counter and quickly flicked on the lights.

Walter immediately saw the culprit of the smell sitting on the stove. The pan that was there had something black seared to its insides, yet it was too charred for him to tell further. Whatever you had made had clearly gone awry and you had quickly cleaned up almost all traces of your failed attempt. You were a good cook and always roped him into whatever cooking show was on tv; even Faye would join the two of you whenever she would stay over. You had spent your down time during the quarantine trying out new recipes; some were good enough to be added to the meal rotation, while others had failed to win approval across the board.

It was no bother to him to take your place as the cook tonight if it meant you had one less thing weighing you down. This time of year was hard on most people and adding in a pandemic only made things more difficult. Tossing the pan into the sink for a well deserved deep cleaning at a later time, Walter noticed his phone light up on the counter. Another text from Faye joined the countless others and now was as good a time as any to go through them.

Walter had to thank whoever blessed him with his daughter and her daily text spams. The mystery of the burned food had been solved without having to wake you. Clearly, you had a bit of trouble with the latkes, but luckily for you now he was home to assist in anyway you needed. Hanukkah dinner could be a team effort. The curly haired man made quick work of getting the pan you had been using clean before he made his way over to the couch you were on. Getting down on bended knee in front of your sleeping form, he gently placed a hand on you to wake you up.

“Sweetheart…would you consider rejoining the land of the living?” He whispered.

“Too cozy,” you grumbled as you pulled an arm up to cover your eyes.

“I bet you are, but you won’t be if I take this blanket,” Walter chuckled.

That got you to sit up and stare blearily at him. “You wouldn’t dare let me freeze” you replied to which he raised an eyebrow at you as if to say try me.

You sighed heavily and pulled the blanket off you before folding and returning it to its spot over the back of the couch. Your bear of a man sat down beside you and gently pat his thigh, the universal signal for you to come cuddle up on his lap. You eagerly shot up and made yourself cozy on his lap, burying your face in his neck and breathing him in. His hand came up to slowly stroke your back as the two of you cuddled in silence.

“What’s on your mind, love?” He questioned as he kissed the top of your head.

You tried to hold back the tears that were eager to pour out, “I miss my family, Walt. I’m so used to spending at least some of the holidays with them. Then my cousins decided to have a latke cook-off since we can’t get together and I burned them. I have no idea how I did it. It was awful and it made me wish that my gram was here to help me fix it. B-b-but she’s back home and I’m here and I don’t know when I’ll get to cook with her again.” The last part came out in as sob.

“Shhhhh honey. Shhhh. It’s ok,” Walter murmured into your hair and he hugged you tightly as you cried into his neck.

It took a few minutes for all your sadness and frustration to be sobbed out. The detective remained the strong beacon of light that his girl needed to get through this storm of emotions. He whispered his love and praises into your hair, never letting go of you even for a second. You needed to get everything out that you been bundling up in inside. When the last remaining tears had fallen and your sniffles had abated, you slowly lifted your head to look at him.

“Well I think together we can try and kick those cousins of yours’ arses, sweetheart. What do you say?”

“I’d say let’s try to save Hanukkah.”

“Good. Up we get,” Walter said, giving a small swat to your butt.

You quickly clamored off of his lap and hurried into the kitchen to get out the supplies. Walter followed after you and waited for further instructions. The two of started cleaning and shredding the potatoes. You even turned it into a game to see who shred the most potatoes the fastest and it turned out a tie. Soon you added the rest of the ingredients to the bowl while he heated the pan. Walter and you worked together as a perfect team; joking around and laughing as you fried the latkes.

Walter set the table as you continued to cook up you Hanukkah meal. He grabbed the applesauce and ketchup since that what you recommended to accompany them. When you had finally finished cooking the last few and added them to the growing pile, you took the precious cargo over to your eager boyfriend. Each latke turned out a perfect golden brown that was hard on the outside and softer in the center. With the first bite, the two of you moaned at the salty, oily goodness.

“Now you see why we only make them once a year,” You hummed in between bites.

“I do indeed. Faye asked you to save her some.”

“Well we did make enough to feed an army. The only issue is you big guy,” You teased,” But yes I can save her some.”

You finished the latke you were on and padded over to the kitchen to grab a container before returning. You carefully placed the latkes inside and headed back to the kitchen to stick them in the freezer for the next time Faye was over. The two of you contentedly ate as many latkes as your stomachs could handle. With your stomachs and hearts full, the table was cleared and you both returned to curl up by the fire.

“Hey Walter,” You started, smiling up at him.

“Yes, love.”

“Thank you.”

[popculturebuffet]

Ducktales Treasure of the Golden Sun: Three Ducks of the Condor or Now with More Racism!

Hello all you happy people! And welcome back to my look at Ducktales: Treasure of the Golden Suns!, the pilot episodes that started it all. This look was one of my patreon stretch goals. To explain them in case some of you aren’t familiar with patreon it’s essentially like a kickstarter stretch goal: every milestone I reach in my monthly earnings means a crop of reviews for you guys, with this being 10 and my review of the movie, and the goofy movies in two weeks and September respectively, being the 15 dollar one. So if you want reviews of the OTHER Ducktales mini series Time Is Money and Super DuckTales, then hop on aboard and help me reach my 20 dollar goal so I can keep making these reviews for a living and give you all more. Said goal also includes a Darkwing Duck review eveyr month AND a review of teh Danny Phantom special The ULtimate Enemy so hop on board HERE AT MY PATREON.  Patrons also get exclusive reviews, access to my discord server (Though if anyone would be more intrersted in me making that public let me know), and to pick a short each time I do a birthday special for a character from Looney Tunes, Disney and Beyond. And next month is my boy Donald’s so since you all already sat out goofy NOW is the time. 

So now my very necessary plug is out of the way, i’m very poor, we can get to the review proper:

When last we left off Scrooge and the Boys went on their first proper adventure together, heading to Central America to follow the map from the first episode and running into Dr.Claw  El Capitan and his new best buddy Glomgold. Mild racisim, moonsoons and much better pacing ensued. 

So join me under the cut as my boy Donald returns, some iconic characters are introduced in Webby, Launchpad and Beakly, though this series only made one of them iconic to be fair, and we get some more mild racisim because fuck my life. Onward to the cut! 

So yeah as I’ve mentioned a few times now this episode had a content warning.. which was fair as there is some pretty cringy stuff in here but it had the side effect of me holding my breath until the racisim came up and whapped me in the face. So i’m keeping that tension up for you guys so I don’t have to suffer alone. 

We open at the Mansion. Scrooge is trying to find a governess for the boys, but they keep scaring off all the clients because they don’t like the idea. And for once.. i’m on Scrooge’s side here. Yes I know there’s a sterotype of rich people hiring a nanny to not have to parent. and it’s sadly often true and it’d SEEM like Scrooge is doing that.. but really he just wants the boys to be safe. He’s fully grown to care for them and just wants someone cheap and responsible to look after them while he’s busy and clearly still makes time for them. As someone who is a former nanny, albeit for someone working class, I get that as much as you WANT to spend every moment with your kid you often can’t. I say all this because SO MANY kids movies and shows villianize parents for not spending time with their kid when their clearly just working to support them. There are nuanced exceptions to this and refreshingly Craig of the Creek has outright avoided this: JP’s mom is gone almost all the time due to working as an airline pilot, but while he clearly misses her he never resents her or guilts her over it, he understands sh’es supporting him and goes out of his way to make sure his friends can meet her. It’s really swee.t And while again I get it, this guys a billionare, most examples aren’t, Scrooge still really CAN’T stop working: He has more money than god and like most bilionares REALLY should give most of it to charity or to help with programs instead of hoarding it in a massive bin.. but he’s also got tons of companies, factories, investments... people COUNTING on him to make sure these are working correctly and keep their jobs. So yeah i’ts nice that the show isn’t demonizing scrooge for this or dosen’t even consider it: he’s getting help beacuse he needs it, that’s what’s important. 

So while the boys widdle down the nannies, Scrooge talks to a renowned coin collector. He does show off his collection to the guy, but his main goal is naturally to show him the coin from last time. Turns out that naturally for a five part episode the treasure they lost last time was just a fraction of the real thing and the real titular treasure is a mythical horde even Scrooge, who normally has proved something out of myth is very real 5 times before breakfast, didn’t think existed. 

Something I do love about this five parter is how every treasure hunt has ended up being important each piece of the puzzle leading to the next like any good treasure hunt. As for where this one leads the collector HAS heard of only one other coin like it, up in the Andes Mountains in a mysterious fortress whose mountain habitat and being a fortress makes it hard to get to and the owner is apparently a real piece of work.. but Scrooge isn’t afraid of a little hard work and is ready to go after it.. he just has to find a Nanny first. 

And he does as there’s only one left: Mrs. Beakley, who we FINALLY meet after two episodes. Yeah for some weird reasont his episode choose to cram the rest of the major main and supporting cast into one episode.. it still works, they all still get great introductions it’s just weird to me when you have five episodes to not say introduce Launchpad last time. 

But regardless as I said it’s a good intro.. despite the boys wilding a lasso and a snake.

 Beakly is unphased and even dosen’t remotely fall for them trying to say she got the wrong name. And while Scrooge is a little impressed, he’s even more when she states she’ll work for free... with one condition: Free room and board for her and her grandaughter, Webby, who has been there the whole time and looking cute as a button. Scrooge is unsure but one minute of Webby being adorable later and he’s agreed. She can’t eat much right? He also hopes she’ll help the boys not be douchebags, unaware that their inherent poorly written sexisim means that was never going to work. And why yes I will call it out eveyr time it happens because it happens every time they have an episode together and only gets worse. 

He goes to Gyro for help and Classic Gyro.. is utterly delightful. While I clearly have issues with Classic Scrooge, whose a greedy poorly aged asshat and the boys, who are sterotypes of male children, Gyro? He’s nice, friendlya nd eccentric, using a delightfully wakcky pogo hat thing to think and takes only a mintue to figure out how to solve a seemingly unsolvable problem and only needs a few hours to build his cool looking bird ship, using bird legs to offset the hard to sort out landing conditions. But since it’s a fancy bitch, it needs a pilot and i’m sure we all know where this is going...but since Carol Danver sis busy he has to go with Launchpad. 

Launchpad’s intro is great, cheerful as he does a job testing a plane and naturally crashes it, and when thought dead walks out seconds later unharmed and jolly as ever. Scrooge is naturally terrified of the prospect of flying with him but dosen’t really have another choice “I hope my insurance is paid up.” Scrooge it’s you.. of course it isn't. 

So with that our hero bids a farewell to the boys and ends up unteitonally coming off MASSIVELY unlikeable. No really he leaves them behind for their saftey despite needing help... and then upon finding out Donald is going to be on leave soon in the andes, and just assumes that YOU KNOW, he’d LIKE to go on a dangerous exausting adventure instead of actually get some rest after working in the goddamn navy and STILL dosen’t take the kids along despite having a very tearjerking farewell IN FRONT OF HIM that happened at most a month ago. Granted i’m suprised Donald is getting leave this soon.. but since I genuinely like to look into this sort of thing and the last time I didn’t I was correctly reminded Gulliver’s Travels was a satire.. and found out someone HAD actually watched the Jack Black movie. I only vaugely remember a trailer.. I thinkn it was a trailer? Maybe it was the middle part of a juinor novelzation where htey have all the photos? I really don’t know. I know almost every pokemon on sight but not where I saw pictures of a forgetable jack black movie, what a shock. 

So long story short I DID google it. Here’s what I got

So given clealry more time has passed than we’ve seen on screen, enough time COULD have passed for Donald’s three day pass to kick in. So credit to the crew for actually thinking that out. They still get all the blame though for not only not seeing how bad not taking the kids to see the uncle whose like a father to them a month after he left when he CLEARLY can is bad, but how worse it is that the first break donald gets ina  month.. is spent helping scrooge against his will on a life or death treasure hunt. 

And I get WHY they wanted to try out having Donald on an adventure: he was in most of the carl barks material.... but I also dont’ get it as Launchpad was deisgned entirely to fill in for Donald when needed, we’re only three episodes into the series and this gives the wrong impression Donald will guest star a lot more. In practice while he still did get a meaty 8 episodes on the show including this one, 2 of which were cameos and the pilot only dosne’t count because of the exnteded slapstick sequence, and dosen’t appear at all after season 1, likely because Fenton’s introduction made him reduntant as he was an even more blatant Donald stand-in. It just feels weird to shove him into the pilot movie when we should be focusing on our main cast, epsecially with so many getting intorduced this episode. It woudl’ve made more sense for Gyro to be the third man instead and it woud’ve elmaited Scrooge’s uttelry horrible actions here of depriving his nephews of their surrogate father. 

So Uncle Dickstick leaves with Launchpad to go abduct donald.... and tha’ts not me being funny, that’s what actually happens. Donald is singing out on leave.. with his superior... weirdly doing paper work outside on the flight deck. 

And is angry at Donald because of him taking pictures and stuff and threatens him if he’s not back exactly in time... because look he’s on a boat with a bunch of sweaty men but as the most superior officer he can’t enjoy that so he has to get off SOMEHOW and ruining donald’s life just happens ot be a thing for him. 

So yeah Scrooge straight up naps Donald via claw and Donald is angry, wondering, as you’d expect “What’s the big idea”.. and once Scrooge clairfies he did it.. still asks that because what the fuck. And the episode treats this as comical, as it does Launchpad not understanding Donald.. and don’t get me wrong you CAN make a good “I can’t understand Donald Duck” joke, the 2017 series made PLENTY. But said series also spoiled me as they did it with far more effort, while also still showing just how much it would suck to have everyone around you struggle to hear what you say and never listen to you. They actually cared abotu Donald’s well being where as this one thinks “Gee you knwo what would go great iwth a hard month’s naval work? MORE WORK HELPING YOUR UNCLE GET RICHER FOR NO PERSONAL BENIFIT AFTER HE KIDNAPS YOU”. 

So our heroes.. and scrooge, head to Andes and find the temple and it’s here “Sigh” we met our antagonist. A Conquestador Douche who DOES have a name and it is on the wiki.. but is so generic and unlikeble I’m just going to keep calling him conquestador douche, whose introduced waving his sun coin around while the natives all bow to him because of the coin.

Welcome to the racisim! Admitely it’s not as bad as Treasure of the Lost Lamp, that’s a high bar to clear, but ti’s still not great to have the racist cliche of “character conquers a civilization because of they belivie he’s a messenger for their “silly” god”. And the saddest part is not that I didn’t notice this trope and how bad it was as a kid watching shows like this... but that as an ADULT about 4 years ago when I watched this episode how racist it and this trope in general was didn’t register to me at all. That.. really bothers me that it took me this long to pick up on things like this and i’m sorry for it. 

That’s honestly WHY we need these warnings and WHY i’m so hard on this racisim: it wasn’t necessary, it could’ve been removed and you clearly just didn’t care or didn’t realize it was racist. And even acceptable for the time dosen’t work for anymore: I learned recently that the creators of Fresh Prince of Bel-Air, both white, hired black writers..and actually LISTENED, looking to them for personal stories and to check them if one of the white staff wrote something that wasn’t true to the black experience. I know that sounds like the bare minimum but this was the early 90′s, that kind of thinking wasn’t hte norm like it is in most writer’s rooms now.. and sadly not ALL writer’s rooms. Not only that but just today I ran into a MST3K skit that lampooned this kind of bullshit from not long after this episode. People clearly knew better, the writers of this episode just didn’t’t care

 So yeah, I get this was a kids show in the 80′s, I get the writing staff being almost all white.. but they still coudl’ve avoided cliche sterotypes and done something diffrent. It was was still wiithin white people like myselves power to actually think about something other htan themselves and we did not. So i’m never going to stop holding my own people accountable for just how BADLY we’ve fucked up in ways great and small because it still hasn’t stopped , likely never will so I won’t. 

But yeah.... the tribe here are portrayed as ignorant, mindless dumbasses who blindly follow tradition and a clearly corrupt leader. It’s patronizingly stupid to assume just because a belief system is diffrent than yours a person will belieive anything. Religion CAN make people act stupid, the fact many people are homophobic simply because the bible, a centuries old document written and distrbuted by humans that could of been altered by people with a clear homophobic agenda, says they should be. But there’s the very clear very gross implication here that any god but the christian god is invalid and simplifies wonderful and well thought out myths and beliviefs from various cultures into “well they belivie in da sun god because of the shiny coin”. It’s gross, i’m glad it’s stopped and it’s VERY telling that the closest Ducktales 2017 came to this was the most dangerous game night which while a tad cringe inducing at least showed the tribe it used was clever, disposed the person they mistook for a god after it was clear he wasn’t one , and were wholly sympathetic. 

Naturally Conquistadouche orders the tribe to attack Scrooge and it works briefly , though Scrogoe prepares to take on the ENTIRE villiage.. and given this is Scrooge and on this blog we’ve seen him take on an entire town before, and that was a more inexpericed less bastardly scrooge yeah their fucked, and only escape death because the coin falls out of scrooge’s coat when he tries to help donald who naturally injures himself trying to help. 

And since as per white dumbass racist logic, the villiagers thought Conquistadipshit was a messenger of the gods because of his coin, they think the same of Scrooge, this causes them to stop and bow instead and protect scrooge when Conquistadumbass tries to attack our heroes. Their given a room for the night naturally. 

Conquistadick demands they give him the coin and leave, but Scrooge has none of that: he has no reason to leave and has all the leverage so he instead demands to know wha’ts going on. 

Turns out Conquisineart is the decdendant of one of the crew from the ship Scrooge found: their captain rain off with it, leaving two of his men behind, though both had the map to the rest of the treasure and split it: one left for the Arctic, the other stayed and did the whole racist god bit. And somehow despite all the time passing Conquistadoodoohead still has his half and Scrooge aranges a trade for the coin. And why yes their is the obvious problem of “what if Conquistascoobydoo say tells them he’s the true god and attacks scrooge like he ends up doing in the climax”. And Scrooge’s plan.. is to have the plane ready and to run to it, despite Launchpad not being a mechanic and saying as much. Instead of you know... stealing the guy’s coin while he’s asleep or something or just having launchpad, whose bigger and stronger and donald whose not bigger but is also stronger hold the guy while Scrooge steals his sun coin, then simply walks to the plane with the map, the coins and all the leverage. at worst the guy tries to do the same scheme without any coins and as the end of the episode shows, that wouldn’t have worked. He was stupid. Oh and the cherry on  top of this shit sundae is scrooge objects to the guys tyranical rule.. but is okay with letting it keep going if he gets his coin and DOnlad, whose there for the deal, never call shim on it. 

We then get a bit of Launchpad being forced off a cliff to ride a giant Condor...

Look this episode is filled with racisit sterotypes, a generic villian and Scrogoe being awful. I’ll take a fun sequence of Launchpad riding a condor, with Donald providing an assit with his camera  by blinding the beast so Launchpad can ride him properly giving them more leverage now Launchpad is popular. And a deadline to fix things by tommorow. 

The next day Launchapd and Donald have defied logic and their own tendency to screw up and fixed the bird, while Scrooge makes the deal.. and naturally it goes EXACTLY how you’d expect and Scrooge runs, though our real heroes get thigns running. 

That’s when the people arrive on condors to persue, a fight insues yoru standard hero stuff.. not bad but given the racist context I can’t really enjoy it like Launchpad flying a condor.. which had some mild racisim in them making him do that as a ritual clearly deisgned to kill him but i’llt ake mild over pretty damn obvious. Eventually douchebag looses his coins, his ctizens abndon him. Happy end. 

So with the map Scrooge decides to do the logical thing.... have launchpad drop him in the middle of the ocean in a raft and steer there

Launchpad takes Donald home in time and his superior is mad he dosen’t give him a proper salute.. even though he CLEARLY just got home and is diisorented from a crash. Launchpad makes a quip and this episode mercifully ends. 

Final Thoughts:

This episode starts out okay.. but quickly goes downhill fast and steep. There are massive bits of racisim, massive leaps in logic, and massive amoutns of scrooge being a dick.. not his WORST in this series but it’s still bad. It’s just not very good. It’s the second worst episode of Ducktales i’ve seen, only held up by my boys Donald and Launchpad. This was miserable.

Next Time on Treasure of the Golden Suns: Our heroes head to the arctic for another offensive episode to rescue scrooge from his own stupidity.  Next Time on this Blog: We return to Green Eggs and Ham and hop on a train as our raging bitchcanoe mother and daughter duo meat our ambigiouslyg ay duo at last. 

See you at the next rainbow.

[tlou2holland]

Joel x reader ( Pt 8 )

Summary: Dina and Ellie come over for a movie night

warnings: none, slight cursing 

You can read the previous parts here 

To say the following weeks have been stressful, is an understatement. You packed all your stuff, realizing its more than originally calculated. Joel pulled a muscle in his back while helping you and couldn’t move properly for at least a week. Dina and Ellie messed with your stuff and laughed at your secret stuffed animal collection that now wasn’t so secret anymore. Maria and Tommy came over for dinner as soon as Joels home became your home too, and you had to cook for someone else for the first time in your life. You burnt your finger and poured way too much salt onto the meat, making it almost uneatable. Nevertheless, you loved every minute of your new life. Not that everything drastically changed, but you found yourself getting used to sleeping next to someone that snores and almost crushes you in their sleep. You came to like the lazy mornings in bed, and late evenings on the porch. You don´t mind sharing your private space with someone else, and miss Joel terribly when he’s not around. You never thought you’d be able to say this, growing up in a literal apocalypse, but you settled down. Found a place to feel safe and comfortable and a person to call your home. Is this how people used to live before everything went to shit? You wonder. 

Tonight would be another night were you’d experience what a normal life used to be like. Ellie and Dina are coming over for a movie night, and you watch Joel as he excitedly prepares some snacks. It’s been months since Ellie actually talked to Joel more than she’s been forced to, but she slowly starts to come around again. You think it’s because of Dina, she has a positive impact on Ellie. Now that the two are officially together as well, life in Jackson almost seems cliché like. So much happiness feels too good to be true. “What got you smiling like that?“ Joel nudges you with your hip and you turn to look at him, dropping the knife in your hand. “Nothing in particular.“ You hand him a piece of the carrot you’ve been cutting and eat one yourself. “It´s the first time you’re hanging out with Dina, right?“ You ask, swinging your carrot in front of Joels face. He chuckles and eats the piece you gave him, sliding a bowl over to you. “Yeah, I mean she’s not my friend. A bit too young for that.“ Joel gives you a funny look and you scratch the carrots from your cutting board into the bowl. “It´s like a double date.“ You giggle and clean the knife with some water. “A weird double date, but still.“ Joel rolls his eyes at you and carries the snacks into the living room, his boots clinging against the hardwood floor. “Don´t remind me.“ He grumbles but you barely hear him. After you finish cleaning up, you join him in the living room and adjust some pictures on the shelves. Joel found an old polaroid a couple of weeks ago and it was still working, so you took pictures with your loved ones and framed them to decorate your home. The one with Ellie, Dina and Jesse you like the most. You are all sitting on the bench, Jesse´s arm around your shoulder while Dina gives Ellie and you bunny ears with her fingers. You smile into the camera and even Ellie laughs, showing off her white teeth. You have more pictures upstairs, private ones, and bite your lip as you think about them. Joel made you pose in your prettiest underwear, sprawled out on your bed, hands reaching towards the camera with a big grin on your face. You were embarrassed at first, but Joel loves the picture and keeps it with him at all times. He said it’s his little reminder of you for when he’s gone on patrol, and you couldn’t help it but laugh at that. You took pictures of him as well, tho. You like the one where he sits on the porch, guitar on his lap and a steaming mug next to him. He was so lost in his playing that he didn’t even realize you took a picture until he saw the bright flash. Another one was taken when you and Joel where cooking together. Tommy visited you two and secretly snapped the picture when Joel was hugging you from behind, a huge smile on both of your faces. “You´re not moving them around again, are you?“ Joels gruff voice pulls you out of your thoughts and you look at him confused. “Huh?“ Your hands fall next to your sides and Joel nods his head towards the frames. “You moved them around at least fife times. You still don’t like the way they look?“ He leans himself against the staircase railing, arms crossed. “Oh no, I was just looking at them.“ You step away from the shelves and push past him to go upstairs. “You should change as well.“ You say over your shoulder as you feel Joels eyes on you. “What´s wrong with what I’m wearing?“ He follows you and swats your bum, making you climb the steps faster. “Your shirt smells, old man.“ You jokingly pull a face and Joel grabs you from behind, trapping you in his arms. “Joel!“ You grab onto the railing and try to break free but Joel simply turns you around and holds your face against his chest. “mmh you smell that?“ He asks, chest vibrating with every word. You scream with laughter and wiggle in his grip, hair getting static from all the friction. “Eww you’re disgusting!“  You tickle his sides to make him let go of you, and dodge out of his arms when he goes to hold his sides. “I just wanted to give you some love, baby.“ He opens his arms for you but you quickly walk into your shared bedroom, shaking your head. “Nah-ah. You can give me love after you put a clean shirt on.“ You pull your own sweater over your head and change into a new one that still smells strongly of soap. “I´ll take you by your word.“ Joel picks your old sweater up from the floor and puts it into the bathtub along with his shirt. A small pile has collected and you groan when you think about having to wash it tomorrow. “Is this smelling alright for you?“ Joel throws his green shirt at you and you fist the material in your hands. “this will do.“ You walk up to him and rest your hands against his chest, briefly playing with the hairs there before leaning up on your toes and kissing him. “and now get ready, we don’t want Ellie and Dina walking in on that, do we?“ Your hand wanders down Joels stomach and he exhales at your touch. “Yes ma´am.“ He quickly pecks your lips and you walk down again, lazily playing with the strings of your hoodie. You look outside and see a thick layer of snow covering the ground, new flakes falling down at a rapid speed. Thinking about all the winters you had to spend outside without a proper roof under your head, you shiver and wrap your arms around yourself. “You don´t hear them knocking?“ Joel skips past you and you break out of your haze, following him to the door. Dina and Ellie come inside, stomping their shoes against the threshold to keep the snow outside. You quickly shut the door behind them to keep the cold air out, and take their jackets to hang them onto your wardrobe. “Next time you’re coming to one of us, outside its fucking cold.“ Dina shakes her arms and Ellie rubs her hands together, blowing into them. “Don´t worry, we have some blankets for you.“ You wave your hand and guide them to the living room, Joel following closely behind. You point to the couch and hold your hands in front of you. “Sit, I’ll get you something to drink.“ You gesture to the empty seats and are about to turn around when Joel kisses your temple. “Sit with them, I’ll get the drinks.“ Ellie awkwardly watches the interaction and loudly plumps down onto the cushions. Dina giggles and sits down next to her, quickly covering the both of them with a blanket and looking at you. “Thank you.“ You smile at Joel and take a seat at the other couch, feet moving to rest on the coffee table in front of you. “help yourselves.“ You gesture to the snacks and Dina sequels when she spots the cookies you made. “God it’s been ages since I last had cookies!“ She reaches into the bowl and gets two, handing one to Ellie. You laugh at your friends eagerness and take one yourself, liking how sweet they taste. “You still like hot cocoa?“ Joel returns from the kitchen and holds four steaming mugs in his hands, talking to Ellie. Her eyes widen and she takes one from Joel. “Shit Joel, where’d you get that?“ She sniffs at the liquid and watches Joel as he gives another mug to Dina and you. “Well, there’s this store on our new patrol route. They still had the powder. It’s long expired, but powder can’t get bad right?“ He takes a sip and curses slightly when he burns the tip of his tongue. You stifle a laugh and blow on it before drinking from your mug, licking your lips afterwards. “You know when I last had this?“ Ellie raises her mug and shakes her head. “It´s been years, I don’t care if its expired or not.“ Ellie shyly looks at Joel and he clears his throat. “I´m glad that you like it.“ Joel presses his lips together and you happily cuddle into his side, throwing a blanket over the two of you. “What movie are we watching?“ Dina rests her head against Ellies shoulder and Joel stares at Ellie and her blushed cheeks, so you elbow him. “Curtis and Viper 4.“ You push yourself away from Joel to grab the remote and turn the TV on. “Sounds old.“ Dina laughs and Ellie lowers her mug from her lips. “It´s Joels favorite.“ She looks at him and gives him a crooked smile. “I like it, too.“ She shrugs her shoulders and you feel Joel tense next to you, trying to hide a smile. “You have no other choice, given how many times I made you watch that.“ Joel wraps his arm around your shoulder and you gently pat his leg under the blanket, happy for him that he can talk to Ellie without it being tensed. “You read savage starlight, I’d say we’re quit.“ Ellie mumbles, quickly eating another cookie to end the conversation. Joel nods and takes the remote from your hands, starting the movie and holding you tight against his side. It feels weird to cuddle Joel in front of others, but on the other side it also feels normal, just a bit foreign. Dina can´t stop staring at you two, and you have to throw some carrots at her to stop her from eying you the whole time. Even Ellie casts a look at you two from time to time, but looks away every time Joels eyes meet hers. „I quite like this.“ You mumble against Joels chest as he starts playing with your hair. “Me too.“ He keeps his eyes directed to the screen and silently mouthes the lines from time to time, thinking you won’t notice. 

The movie goes on for what feels like forever, and when its over, Dina and Ellie are softly snoring on the sofa next to you. You nudge Joel and turn off the Tv, lazily stretching yourself. “Should we let them sleep?“ You whisper. Joel looks at Ellie and collects another blanket, standing up and softly laying it over her. You never heard him walk this quiet before and hold onto your chest, a smile evident on your face. “They had patrol this morning, let them rest.“ Joel grabs the mugs and winces when they bump into each other and make noise. Dina simply scratches her nose and mumbles something inaudible, leaning more against Ellie. You grab the bowls from the table and put the contents into a container to keep them fresh before walking up the stairs with Joel. “When was the last time you slept under the same roof with three women?“ You joke, stifling a yawn with your hand. “It´s the first time I will be sleeping while three women are under my roof.“ Joel teases back, and you look at him with wide eyes. “I´m joking baby.“ Joel laughs at your shocked impression and lays an arm around you. You quiet down his laughing by kissing him, tasting chocolate and cookies on his tongue. “You better be.“ You peel yourself away from him and get ready for bed, sighing heavily when your body connects with the mattress. Joel grunts and lays down next to you, bed squeaking under his weight. You lay on your side and open your arm, inviting Joel to snuggle closer. He rests his head on your pillow and hugs you close, your own arms wrapping around his neck. “Maybe they’ll come around more often.“ You mumble as you stroke Joels thick hair. He closes his eyes and draws small patterns on your back. “I ain´t complaining, house is big enough.“ His hot breath fans your chest and you scratch his neck, nails grazing over the skin. “You´re not going to ask them to move in as well, are you?“ You close your eyes and hear Joel chuckle beneath you. “Don´t worry, you won’t have to share me with anyone else.“ He pinches your side and you swat his hand away with a giggle. “Good, you don’t want to see me jealous.“ “Oh I think I’d might like that.“ Joel bites the exposed flesh of your collarbone and you gasp, hands moving to push him away. “Stop it.“ You give him a warning look but he can’t see your face in the dark, continuing to roam his hands over your body. A shiver erupts along your spine as his hands move under your shirt and towards your breasts, brushing over the sensitive flesh. “you really want me to stop?“ His breath hits your ear and he attacks your jaw with kisses, moving down to your sweet spot. “We have Ellie and Dina downstairs.“ You say weakly, hands stopping to push him away and resting on his shoulders instead. “You have to stay quiet, then.“ “Joel.“ Your voice is raspy and you finally find the self-control to grab his hands and keep them trapped in yours. “No funny business tonight.“ You say in a stern voice, although your smile says otherwise. “Fine.“ Joel sighs and pulls his hands out of your hold, dramatically turning around, his back facing you. “Oh come on.“ You giggle and snuggle closer, hugging him from behind. Joel reaches for your hand and pulls your arm under his, keeping your hand close to his chest. You lean your face against his strong shoulder and kiss his shirtless form, feeling how warm his skin is against your lips. “Good night, baby.“ He kisses your hand in return and you tangle your legs with his, warming your cold feet on his warm ones. “Good night.“  

 Your sleep doesn’t last long. A gentle kiss to your forehead wakes you up, and you open your eyes. Outside its still dark and the only lightning is coming from downstairs, together with hushed voices. “Tommy and I have to clean some infected areas, Maria wants us to do it before you guys go on patrol.“ Joels voice is still groggy from the lack of using it overnight, and you sit up, covers sliding to your hip. “You have to leave now?“ You ask tiredly, rubbing sleep from your eyes. Joel nods and you realize he’s already dressed, jacket and backpack laying by the end of the bed. “Be careful, okay?“ You cup his cheek and pull him down for a kiss, lips lazily moving against his. He pulls away and gets up to strip on his jacket. “Always.“ He pulls the covers back over your sleeping form and you watch him leave, before dozing off for some more minutes. Sleep won’t come back, you’re too worried for that. So you get up after some tossing and turning, and decide to start your day. Dina and Ellie have already left, probably awoken by Tommy or Joel. You eat breakfast in silence and clean a bit afterwards, washing the dreaded laundry and hanging it all around the house to dry. After you got ready yourself, you prepare your backpack and make your way over to the butcher where you’d meet Jesse. You’re assigned for patrol this late morning, and he’s your partner. You already see his slender form leaning against a wooden pole, chatting away with Marcus. You sigh and approach the two, boots sinking into the snow. “Morning guys.“ You awkwardly wave at them and dodge Marcus gaze. “You´re early for once.“ Jesse teases and salutes at you, while Marcus looks anywhere but to you. “Well, eh-“He scratches his neck and slowly backs away, fingers pointing over his shoulder. “I´ll get going, I´m needed somewhere else.“ He quickly bits goodbye to Jesse and stumbles down the few stairs, hurrying along the streets towards god knows where. Jesse looks at you and raises an eyebrow. “Did he ever apologize to you?“ Jesse asks. You nod and slip your gloves on, breath thick like a cloud in front of your face. “Once, but he couldn’t even look me in the eye. I don´t mind tho, I know it was an accident. It’s Joel he needs to apologize to.“ “Yeah that’s never going to happen.“ Jesse shakes his head and you chuckle, following him towards the gate. “I know, Joel won’t apologize for pushing him either. He´s one hell of a stubborn man.“ You kick some snow from your feet and Jesse shrugs his shoulders. “He´s not the only stubborn person here.“ Jesse gives you a look and you roll your eyes. “Oh cause you’re so much better.“ You laugh and shove Jesse further away from you, his chuckle ringing in your eyes. “I´m just saying, you’re almost as stubborn as Dina. And that means something.“ He points his finger at you and you ignore his comment, changing the topic. “Why did Maria sent Tommy and Joel on an early patrol? Isn´t it way more dangerous?“ You frown and Jesse rests his hands on his hips, stopping at the east gate. “There´s been a lot of infected sightings lately, Maria simply wants them to clear the path for us. They’re experienced and can take a look at how bad the situation really is. Don´t worry, they’ll be fine.“ He briefly looks at you as you guys wait for your horses. “You better be right, I don’t want to become a widow.“ You mumble gloomily. “Don´t you guys need to be married for that, first?“ Jesse jokes and you shoot him a glare. “Not funny.“ You gladly take the reins from the stables boy and greet your horse with a quick pet when they approach. Your legs feel stiff as you swing yourself on top and get seated into the saddle. Jesse does the same and gestures for the security people to open the gate. “We´ll be fine, the same goes for Tommy and Joel.“ With that his horse picks up speed and runs over the snowy fields, you following close behind. You cringe at the cold wind clapping against your face and pull the hood of your sweater over your head to keep your ears from freezing off. “You know where we’re going?“ You shout over the loud whistling of wind. “Yeah, just follow me!“ Jesse guides you through some abandoned villages and to the next lookout, hidden inside an old tower. You breathe out relieved, happy that no infected crossed your path so far. You bind your horses onto a pole and climb up the rusty ladder to get inside. “Here, look around for any infected while I write our names into the book.“ Jesse hands you field glasses and you position yourself in front of the big window, overlooking the small town. “I see nothing.“ You state as you scan the area, spotting nothing of danger or matter. “You checked the woods too?“ Jesse asks as he scribbles something into the book, probably that your lookout was still safe and nothing ordinary happened. “Yeah, no lights, no infected. Nothing.“ You lower the glasses and hand them to Jesse when he walks over to you. “Hmm, we should keep looking for a bit. Maria said a horde was spotted here some days ago.“ “A horde?“ You shiver at the thought of having dozens of infected roaming through the woods. “Yeah, they’re inside some buildings. We need to clean them on the next group patrol.“ “Jeeze.“ You cross your arms in front of your chest and step back, watching Jesse from behind. “Yeah, it’s going to be interesting for sure.“ Jesse stops looking around and puts the glasses back onto the old tray he got them from. “The weather is changing for the worst, let´s head back, Joel and Tommy should also be on their way. We can prepare everything for the next patrol and pick our team.“ Jesse slides the backpack onto his shoulders and you grab yours, blowing a last puff of hot air into your palms before following him. “I can´t wait.“ You say sarcastically, climbing back onto your horse and making your way back to Jackson. Today’s patrol was unspectacular and quick, and you are grateful for it. Next patrol will be hard enough… 

[someguynamedstevewrites]

“My Roommate is an Apparition” Christmas Special

Based on characters created by @reddpenn

—————————————————————

“It was a dark and cloudy evening on the twenty-ninth of November.

The end of a Black Friday the likes few would remember.

In an art supply store that can be found somewhere.

A person named Lily almost pulled out their hair.

With sale after sale, and all the price drops,

Poor Lily was tired. She wanted it to stop.

She dragged her feet one after another, with muscles so sore.

It felt like she walked a thousand miles to fall down at her door.

But now it was over, and at last she was free.

To veg out on her couch, and watch shows on TV.

But before she could indulge in being a couch potato,

There was still the matter of her roommate who...

...

Who...”

Lily tapped the pen against her chin as she tried to come up with a good word that rhymed with potato. Her head rested on a cushion against the arm rest of her couch as she slouched back; crossing one leg over the other. One of her spiral notebooks rested in her lap as she turned her head to look at her roommate.

The ghostly apparition stood motionless with a gaunt expression. Their eyes were wide with tiny pupils that somehow weren’t necessarily bloodshot, but at the same time, also bloodshot... but without the blood part. Their unkempt long hair fell down over their nearly non-existent shoulders and down their back, if you could call it that. Anyone who saw them standing next to them would likely jump out of their skin. If they could see them.

They were watching Spongebob Squarepants on Nickelodeon.

It was a rerun of the first episode, and the falsetto voice of Tiny Tim began to fill the apartment.

“Things that bother you Never bother me!

I feel happy and fine!

Living in the sunlight!

Loving in the moonlight!”

“Hav...ing... a... wonder... ful... time...”

Lily could tell the apparition was trying to sing along with its raspy voice. It sounded more like muttering under their breath, but it was clear what they were doing. It had to be difficult for it since they didn’t necessarily have lungs, vocal chords, or any other body parts usually involved with singing (as far as Lily knew). But despite that, it was still happy, bobbing their head slowly from side to side as they tried to keep up with the song.

Lily couldn’t help but think it was adorable; like a Pre-Schooler trying to sing along with their favorite cartoon.

It was the apparition’s scheduled cartoon time, and Lily had just come home after a very long morning, day, and night at work. As exhausting as working on Black Friday was, Lily was thankful to have a nice place to return to where she could unwind and relax. She was also thankful that the rent was surprisingly cheap too; what with the apartment being haunted and all.

She remembered the look on her landlord’s face when she signed the lease. It was a mixture of horror, surprise, and joy in response to finally finding someone willing to rent the apartment. Previous tenants would often report of strange things happening when they lived there. Their TV’s would turn on by themselves at random times. Sometimes the channels would change on their own, and whenever the tenant tried changing it back, they could hear an ethereal whisper demanding that they change the channel.

But Lily weren’t afraid of no ghosts, and took one of her first steps to independent living with dirt cheap rent.

A spooky chuckle came from her roommate as they watched Spongebob completely ruin Squidward’s day ...again. If not for the fact that Lily could see the pale, see-through entity that made that noise, she probably would have found the laughter rather creepy. But she didn’t, and in the spirit of the season, Lily mentally noted how she was thankful that she could see her specter of a roommate.

This train of thought led Lily back to one of the questions she had been asking herself for the past couple months: Why could she see the apparition when nobody else could?

Several possible answers ran through her head. Maybe she had secret powers that she wasn’t aware of? Maybe she was the “chosen” one, selected by the mysterious wraith to be the only person that could see them? Or maybe there was something about them that made them kindred spirits in a way? And if so, what tied them together?

Lily’s train of thought was derailed by the sudden commercial break on the TV, signaling that Spongebob had ended, and Lily knew what that meant. It was finally her turn to have the TV!

“Okay, show’s over. Now it’s my turn to watch something.”

Lily’s roommate gave a disappointed sigh as Lily snatched up the remote and changed the channel to CBS. It was prime time and time for some Hawaii Five-O. Sure it wasn’t the most mentally stimulating television program out there and one could argue it had the same level of intellect as Spongebob, but it was what Lily wanted to watch and watch it she would!

Or at least that would have been the case if not for a tiny spanner in the works. What greeted Lily after changing the channel was not Hawaii Five-O, but a familiar sight that Lily had not seen for a long, long time. Bongos could be heard as the word “Special” spun around colorfully on the screen before resting in place and showing “A CBS Special Presentation”.

A bright blue background with images of snowflakes falling appeared on the TV screen, accompanied by a calming, familiar, song.

“Fahoo forays, dahoo dorays

Welcome Christmas, bring your light

Fahoo forays, dahoo dorays

Welcome in the cold of night.”

“No kidding...” Lily said to herself in amazement. She hadn’t seen How The Grinch Stole Christmas in years. And it wasn’t the live action remake with Jim Carrey or the newer animated movie with Benedict Cumberbatch either. It was the genuine, original, Chuck Jones animated TV special with Boris Karloff narrating.

Lily remembered watching this on TV with her parents when she was little. It was one of the many Christmas specials that would air instead of the usual TV programming at night, and was just the thing for a 8-year old to enjoy before being tucked into bed for a 9 PM bedtime. Fond memories of the Christmas Tree in the living room, glowing with lights, and a stack of presents underneath it came flooding back to her in a wave of nostalgia.

It wasn’t Hawaii Five-O, but Lily wasn’t about to complain. In fact, she thought it was the perfect way to usher in the holiday season after the shopping turmoil of Black Friday. But as she kicked back to relax, she took a look at her roommate and couldn’t believe her eyes and ears.

“Every Who... down in Whoville... liked Christmas a lot.

But the Grinch... who lived just North of Whoville... did not!” said the apparition.

Its face was practically glowing with a warm smile that stretched almost from ear to non-existent ear on her face. Normally, Lily’s roommate was literally quite clear. Its transparent body made it easy to see right through them. But as it gazed at the Christmas Classic playing on the TV, Lily could have sworn that she saw a faint light beginning to emanate from her roommate.

The apparition’s pale, translucent skin looked like it was becoming opaque. A soft, warm glow radiated from its body as though it had just swallowed a night light. And all the while, the apparition spoke along with Boris Karloff’s narration word for word.

“The Grinch... hated Christmas!

The whole Christmas... season!

Now... please don't ask... why.

No one... quite knows the... reason,” the apparition quoted as it did its best to keep up with Boris Karloff’s pace.

“Wow! You’ve got the whole thing memorized, don’t yah?” Lily said with a smile.

The apparition turned around and smiled back at Lily, but this smile was different from before. Their smiles were usually filled with sharp, pointy teeth with an almost maniacal look to them. This smile, however, didn’t stretch across the whole of their face. Furthermore, while their teeth were still pointy, they looked somewhat smaller; almost human, even. It was a soft, warm, friendly smile.

It turned back around and continued to watch the TV classic, and as it did, Lily sat upright and scooted over to one side of the couch.

“Hey,” Lily called out, “care to join me?” She said while patting the seat next to her on the couch. Without taking its eyes off the television, the apparition walked backwards, somehow, onto the couch and then proceeded to sit next to Lily. “C’mere you,” Lily said as she took a throw blanket resting on the back of the couch and draped it around herself and her roommate.

Despite her roommate’s lack of substance, Lily felt warm and comfortable under the blanket. She could feel the faintest touch as the apparition’s head limped to the side and came to rest on her shoulder. It still quoted and sang along with the Christmas classic, but quietly so as not to disturb the viewing experience of their corporeal roommate.

It was peaceful, calm, and comforting. As they watched, Lily looked at her notebook that was now sitting on the floor. The movement of inviting her roommate to the couch had knocked it off. Looking at it, Lily figured out what to put down to finish her little post-Black Friday stress relief poem.

“... But before she could indulge in being a couch potato,

There was still the matter of her roommate who would not let go.

But as mysterious and weird as her roommate might be,

There was something about it that brought a warm smile to Lily.

And so the two sat on the couch in front of the TV,

Enjoying their time together as it was meant to be.”

Lily made a mental note to write that down once the show was over...

...but unfortunately forgot.

[joat-jackofalltrades]

Batfam OC Headcanons

These headcanons are all about my superfamily, who I've dubbed the Shadefam. I have post dedicated to their basic info, here. I'm posting this for fun and to invite others to make their own super family or OC family with far too many headcanon and random chapters for a book that'll never be written.

BTW when I say S1, S2, or S3 I'm referring to the certain seasons in Young Justice

Buck- trans ftm taken in by Faith at age 12 because his father isn’t able to properly take care of him. (His dad loves and accepts him, but is very broke and wants what’s best for his son)

Hope is taken in by her sister at age 8 in 2013 when their mother died

Buck dates Bart for a period of time before they mutually agree to break up, both lowkey being attached to other teammates at the time (Jaime and Tim)

Faith is bi and doing fine

Grace is lesbian and freaking disaster

Hope is ace and valid

Buck is trans/gay and perfect

Cody is ace/aro and chillin with his homies

Faith and Grace had a fling for a few months but broke up mutually

Grace has a butch lesbian girlfriend named Joana

They always go to pride and their hero atls hang different pride flags the night before July 1st around the city

Hope lowkey grew up without really registering gender and doesn’t say hello to new people, but asks for their preferred pronouns

Bart’s the closest person to Buck in the Outsiders, being the only person that knows about his true powers as well as the few that knows his birth name

Goes to Bart or Garfield when he has a nightmare at the headquarters

Bruce payed for Buck’s top surgery after S2

Keith is the only straight person in the Shadows

Lily is pan and loves her frogs

Lily really likes frogs and has a small tank for them in her apartment

Hope has one frog gifted to her from her favorite aunt

Cody is the only person allowed to cook in the Manor

Cuddle piles when the enter family is together at their secret hideout

Cody is the only one that owns an actual house and they use the basement as their “hideout”

Lots of “Are the Straights Okay?” moments when the group is people watching during stakeouts

Grace being a flirt to everyone

Hope knowing every curse word at age 9 because her sister can’t shut up

Lots of scolding because of profanity

Faith smacking people upside the head

Cody is Buck’s go to when he’s feeling dysphoria when he’s with the fam

Family nights every friday cause none of them got the most normal lives (Faith lost her parents young as did Cody, Grace wasn’t accepted by her family and lost her parents before even turning 20, Hope only had her parents for 8 years, Lily never had a father and her mother is a thief, Buck lost his mother young and left his father before age 13, and Keith lived mostly alone with a constantly working father. Plus they’re all heroes so I mean none of them are remotely normal)

Cody entered the Shadefam after S3 and doesn’t know that he was previously working with Jason for a period of time

Very confused brother reunion when Cody and Jason meet again

The pair of them both worked for Ra’s a Ghul at the same time in the S3

Lily gives Buck a frog plush that he holds after nightmares at the headquarters

Faith does daily calls to her children

Faith was raised by Bruce, how could she not take in a small child that looks like a mini her

Faith being a mom to everyone, even her brother at times

Faith: “Cody… why are you not wearing any socks?”

Cody: “Why would I be wearing socks?”

Faith: “Because the floor is freezing! Now go put on some damn socks so you don’t get a cold!”

Cody: “But-”

Faith: “Do not try me Cody North Miers.”

Cody: “Damn… the middle name.”

Cody trying to keep Lily and Grace from getting killed on the field

Faith trying to keep Lily and Grace from getting killed off the field

Faith moves in with Keith after her amputation because he has a first floor apartment and she can’t do stairs yet

Keith finds out about MJ and Faith finds out about Hunter after he sneaks back in from a patrol before the accident

Grace and Lily are chaotic a hell, pushing themselves as far as they can during training and mission

They are the two that get hurt the most often

Though Faith always has the worst injuries cause she’s a mama bear that will leap in front of her children

Cody will get pretty severe ones as well when he jumps in front of Faith

Cody: “Why the fuck do you keep jumping in front of them?!”

Faith: “I am mama bear bitch!”

Cody: “Well stop being mama bear cause you’re going to get yourself killed one day.”

Faith: “I can’t die bitch!”

Cody and Faith being responsible adults and the most mature of the group, to being bickering siblings at each other's throats

It always ends up shocking the rest of the fam as well as the Team and the Batfam

Cody: “Can you grab me a pop?”

Faith: “The hell is a pop?”

Cody: “You know a Coke or Sprite.”

Faith: “You mean a soda?”

Cody: “Yeah a pop.”

Faith: “It’s soda!”

Cody: “Pop!”

Faith: “SODA!”

Cody: “POP!”

Halo: “Are they fighting over what to call a drink?”

Buck: “Yeah…”

The Shadefam is sort of a faction of the Batfam

Buck ships Bartuardo and got Hope to agree with him after she jumped ship from Bluepulse

Bruce is lowkey protective of Buck (he loves his grandson)

Buck is Alfred’s favorite of the Shadefam children

Cody and Faith are his favorites of the adults

Faith insists they eat dinner at the table together before leaving early to go invent

Grace and Faith have coffee addictions

Hope is not allowed near caffeine, neither is Buck

Lily shows up at Grace’s and Faith’s separate apartments randomly

Faith was the shoulder Lily cried in after Jason death

Bruce accidentally introduced Buck as his grandson to a board of people when he stopped by Wayne Enterprise

Bruce: “This is Buck, my grandson. He’ll be sitting in today because his mother is busy.”

The news outlets had a field day trying to figure out which Wayne kid was his parents and the person that they knocked up or got knocked up by. Many settled on Faith getting knocked up by some random guy before realizing the math didn’t work.

One outlet found out that Buck was born female and called him a “she” in their coverage of it.

Bruce lost it.

Bruce: “I read your coverage of my grandson. I would like to kindly ask you to pull that story.”

Reporter: “But Wayne sir.”

Bruce: “You misgendered my grandson. So either print an apology or I will be suing.”

Bruce does not stand for misgendering

Keith and Faith child’s godmothers are Grace and Joana

Hope and Buck are practically their child’s older siblings

Lily is the child’s favorite auntie

Keith leaves after their child’s birth

Keith: “Someone needs to be here in case something happens to you.”

Faith: “Nothing’s going to happen to me, Love.”

Keith: “Can you guarantee that?”

Faith: “...”

Keith: “That’s what I thought.”

Faith: “I’m not leaving.”

Keith: “I know. And I don’t blame you. You were built for the hero’s life. I wasn’t.”

Faith: “I swear I’ll be careful. For you and for them.”

Both Hope and Buck move to the Outsiders and later Buck leads the Team, leaving the Shadows.

Faith: “The Team? Buck that’s great!”

Buck: “I thought you’d be a bit more… I don’t know feeling the mode about this.”

Faith: “Why? Cause my little hodgepodge of a team is losing a member?”

Buck: “Well yeah.”

Faith: “Buck. The Shadows were just a covert team for the East. Plus it’s not like I’m really losing you. You are my son after all.”

Buck: “I know. And I’ll never forget that… Mom.”

Lily moved in with Jason and the two of them focused more on Gotham, Lily becoming a true Bat.

Lily: “So I guess I’m a Bat now.”

Faith: “Yup.”

Lily: “No longer a Shade.”

Faith: “The Shades were created by a Bat and consisted of like four current Bat members. The Shades are like a stepping stone.”

Lily: “I guess. I’m still gonna miss family nights.”

Faith: “The Shadows might be decreasing in numbers, but that doesn’t mean we’re ending Shade family nights. Bring along Jason, I’m sure he’ll have a ton of fun.”

Lily: “Yeah surrounded by youngins! He’ll be ecstatic!”

Faith: “Well he does need to prepare.”

Lily: “How the fuck did you know!”

Faith: “Wait, what!”

And that’s how Faith learned Lily was pregnant

Grace leaves the hero world once she and Joana get married and she becomes a criminal prosecutor, sealing the fate of the Shadows

Faith: “So you’re giving it up then?”

Grace: “The hero's life is great and every Faith, but.”

Faith: “I know. It’s a lot.”

Grace: “I mean I never wanted to be a hero, I just wanted to put the bad guys away. That’s what I’m doing now. Plus Joana always frets over me after a mission, even if nothing bad happened.”

Faith: “That’s pretty reasonable. Keith tends to exaggerate the smallest cuts.”

Grace: “So you’re not upset that you’re losing another member?”

Faith: “The Shadows were just a covert team for smaller crimes. I always have my back up with the League.”

Grace: “So the Shadows are done now?”

Faith: “For the time being.”

Cody never left the team, but with only two members it became more of a partnership. They continued to work together, with them assisting the League, Team, and Bats whenever they were needed

Even after the team breaks up, they all gather up once a month and hang out for board games, movies, or a patrol around the city for old times sake.

The older members (Faith, Grace, and Keith) do a lot of reminiscing while the “kids” (Buck, Lily, and Hope) just goan and roll their eyes as Cody listens to the tales of his sister and her friends

Lily and Jason never planned on having any biological children, but they did plan on taking in a street kid. They ended up with one biological child and one street kid

Cody becomes the next Bruce Wayne, training and taking in kids that need a good home

Grace and Joana have three kids, two of which have Grace’s abilities

The entire Shade family is always invited to Bat family reunions. Damian was very confused by the massive amount of people that showed up after Bruce told him he only had a “few” siblings.

Damian: “Eight is not a few Father.”

Bruce: “You have seven siblings Damian. Buck is your nephew.”

Damian: “He’s nearly 16 years older than me.”

Bruce: “Yes but he’s Faith’s son.”

Damian: “Reigns is only seven years younger than Miers.”

Bruce: “He still calls her mom correct?”

Damian: “Yes.”

Bruce: “And he calls me Grandpa?”

Damian: “Yes.”

Bruce: “Then he is your nephew.”

Damian: “But Kyle also calls her mom.”

Bruce: “Your sister does it as a joke to annoy your oldest sister.”

Damian: “Kyle is the only blood sibling I have here. Why must I consider the rest of these people siblings?”

Bruce: “Because they are.”

Damian: “Well… seven is still not a small amount of people.”

Bruce: “With the amount of people here, seven is a few.”

Cody is a light sleeper, waking at the slightest sounds

Grace sleeps like the dead, freezing water and banging pots are the only thing that wake her

Keith can sleep through stuff if he’s in a deep sleep, but also wakes to small shifts in the bed when Faith has a nightmare

Faith is another light sleeper, though not as light as her brother

Lily can and will sleep through anything that doesn’t sound threatening, aka wakes only to gunshots and the scrapping of a blade in its sheath

Buck is a deep sleeper, though often wakes to nightmares

Hope sleeps a lot like her sister, though she’s easier to wake up

When Cody wakes up, he’s up. If he’s woken up, a perimeter check is needed before he goes to sleep. If he wakes up on his own, he still does a perimeter check before going about his day

Grace doesn’t fully wake up until she’s had her eggs and instant caramel coffee

Keith rises with the sun full of energy after seeing Faith sleeping beside him

Faith wakes up tired and a little sluggish, needing black coffee to really wake up in the morning

Lily lives in a permanent state of sluggishness during daylight hours, she draws her power through the moon

Buck is always a bit tired, with usual bursts of random energy

Hope wakes with the sun cause she herself is a ray of sun

Faith & Keith child

Valarie (biological)

Cody’s children

Westly (adopted)

Conner (adopted)

Grace & Joana’ children

Derek (Grace’s biological)

Sophie (Grace’s biological)

Adrian (adopted)

Jason & Lily’s children

Charlie (street kid)

Jaden (biological)

Faith, Hope, and Grace are called the holy trinity as a joke

How Lily and Jason act

PDA constantly, it’s not huge things but it’s very clear that they are together

Nightmare comfort

Got together after Jason came back from the dead, working together as Red Hood and Scarlet Falcon

Were rivals of sorts before his death when Lily was still Misfortune. They fought a lot as Robin and Misfortune, though Faith refuses to let Jason take her in

Lily runs cold so she often wears Jason’s jacket

Faith gave both Lily and Jason the “if you hurt my sibling” lecture. Jason was terrified by it, while Lily shrugged it off

Faith: “You hurt my baby brother, I will hurt you tenfold. I will get a crowbar.”

Lily: “Reasonable.”

Faith: “If you hurt my baby sister, I will hurt you tenfold. I will get a crowbar.”

Jason: “Okay ma’am.”

Buck isn’t a meta but cursed

Hope gets killed in 2023 during the first mission that the team gets together after 2020

Shadefam split by 2020, with Keith, Hope, & Buck leaving in 2018, Grace leaving in 2019, and Lily leaving in 2020 with Faith moving from High Hills in 2019

Keith and Faith move after S3 in 2019 to Star City to man the Wayne Enterprise in the West and raise Valerie in a less crime-ridden area

Cody takes over protecting High Hills, taking on two wards

Grace and Joana move to a smaller town outside of New York so Grace couldn’t be dragged back into the Life

Lily lives with Jason in Gotham

Cody was almost taken by the Court of Owls to become a Talon (their mother’s death was a result of the Court) saved by the League of Shadows instead

Valerie

Metahuman with the True Sight ability

Born 2018

Year younger than Damian

Joins the Team as Seer

Connor

Eldest of the Shade children

Born 2014

Joins the family when he's seven

Loves musical theatre

Doesn’t do fieldwork and works as the man behind the screen for his brother and father

Westly

Second eldest of the Shade children

Born 2016

Joins the family when he's six

Works on the field with his father (Bullseye)

Mathlete

Derek & Sophie

Twins

Born 2019

Sophie is a shadow bender (Yin)

Derek is a light bender (Yang)

Both join the Life (much to Joana dismay)

Adrian

Same age as the “twins”

Born 2019

Doesn’t join the Life

Works with their mom (Joana) in the family jeweler shop

Charlie

Equal eldest Shade child (though entered the family far later than Conner)

Born 2014

Joins the family when he's nine

Doesn’t join the Life and studies pre-med to fix up his family

Jaden

(2020)

Joins the Life

When People Call Faith “Mom”

Cody, Grace, Dick, and Jason call her Mom as a joke or when she’s being to much of a mama bear

Grace: “Alright. Alright Mom. We’ll stop.”

Faith: “Don’t call me Mom Grace.”

Dick: “Alright… Mama Bear.”

Faith: “I will kill you Dick.”

Jason: “Oh don’t kill him Mum, he’s a good big brother.”

Faith: “-Jay.”

Cody: “Relax Mother. They’re just playing with you.”

Faith: “CODY!”

Lily does it as a joke most of the time, though often accidentally does it

Lily: “Jeez let up Faith I’m fine.”

Faith: “Fine? Lily, you nearly bled out an hour ago.”

Lily: “Yeah an hour a ago.”

Faith: “Sit the fuck back down you asshole.”

Lily: “Okay.”

Faith: “What were you thinking Lily? You could have been killed. You could have gotten Buck killed.”

Lily: “You quoting Lion King now?”

Faith: “Lily.”

Lily: “Sorry.”

Faith: “What were you planning, Lily? What if we couldn’t have gotten to you in time? What if Buck was in your place? What if we lost you?”

Lily: “I’m- I’m sorry Mom.”

Faith: “I know you- Did you just call me Mom?”

Lily: “Aaaa- no?”

Hope never means to call Faith Mom, but it does just kind of happen

Faith: “Time to get up, Hope. You got school in thirty minutes.”

Hope: “Mmmm.”

Faith: “Come on Hope.”

Hope: “I don’t wanna go Mom.”

Faith: “It’s only for seven hours, Hope.”

Hope: “Mmm. Fine.”

Faith: “Good. Be ready in ten please.”

Hope: “Alright M- Faith. I meant Faith… not Mom.”

Buck calls her Mom the most (besides her own daughter)

Faith: “Have fun sweety.”

Buck: “I will Mom.”

Faith: “You know I’m not old enough to be your mother.”

Buck: “I know Mom. And you know I don’t care.”

faith: “And neither do I in all honesty.”

Tim accidentally called her mom once, which her reflect response was “I’m too young to be your mother”

Faith: “Tim? What are you still doing up?”

Tim: “Working.”

Faith: “For how long?”

Tim: “... I’m on hour… 56?”

Faith: “Go to bed Tim.”

Tim: “But I just need 10 more hours to finish.”

Faith: “Nope. You’re going to bed.”

Tim: “Hey! Put me down!”

Faith: “No. Tim you are a growing boy who needs to sleep.”

Tim: “But I have to-”

Faith: “Sleep! You have to sleep.”

Tim: “Put me down Faith.”

Faith: “Alright.”

Tim: “No I’m not going to bed.”

Faith: “Yes. Yes, you are.”

Tim: “I don’t need you to tuck me in Faith. I’m a grown man.”

Faith: “You’re a seventeen-year-old boy, not a grown man. Now go to bed.”

Tim: “Mmm. Fine. Good night Mom.”

Faith: “I’m too young to be your mother.”

Tim: “...”

Faith: “Good night Timmy.”

Damian also did it by accident once (Jason never let him live it down)

Faith: “I’m fine guys. Just a bit banged up.”

Jason: “Just a bit?”

Dick: “Faith you were held captive for nearly three weeks.”

Tim: “We stayed up endless nights to get you back.”

Lily: “We got to you to find you with a punctured lung and a broken arm.”

Faith: “Yes. But I’m fine now.”

Bruce: “You’re off patrol for the next three weeks and I’ll make sure you get a week off from work.”

Faith: “I don’t need that Bruce. I’ll be fine going back to work and I doubt three weeks probation is needed.”

Damian: “You nearly died Mother!”

Everyone: “Mother?”

Faith: “...”

Tim: “Did you just call Faith Mother?”

Dick: “Well it certainly wasn’t a joke.”

Jason: “I think the demon needs a mommy figure.”

Damian: “Shut up Todd!”

Jason: “Demon misses his mommy!”

Damian: “I said SHUT UP!”

Faith: “Enough! Both of you! Damian get off your brother! Jason stop teasing your brother.”

Damian: “...”

Faith: “Thank you. Now. Damian I’m fine. I’ve been through far worse.”

Lily: “No you haven’t.”

Faith: “You do remember that I got into a car accident where I lost my leg, right?”

Lily: “... Right.”

Faith: “Now I’m going to go watch a movie cause I’ve been stuck in a wooden chair for a few weeks and I have a strange urge to watch Ratatouille.”

And that's it for now. I might make another post about these guys, maybe I won't, depends if people like this.

[mazzy-moon]

A Lone Butterfly - Chapter 8

Title of Chapter: An Eye For An Eye

Word Count: 1.6k

Warnings/Tags: Death, Blood, Violence, Swearing, Grief, Non-gratuitous descriptions of gore, references to kidnapping

Pairing: Javier Peña (Narcos) x Isabel Cotrille (OFC)

Summary:  A year has passed since Isabel was kidnapped and rescued by Javier. Despite establishing her new life thousands of miles away from Columbia, her past follows her.

Notes: This is a rough one, but I promise things will get warm, fuzzy, and sexy in the not too distant future. Thank you to anyone who takes the time to read my story. Love you. x

Find this chapter on ao3

                               ONE YEAR LATER

The sand squishes between my toes as I take my daily run along Cannon Beach. It's cold today. I wonder what the weather is like in Columbia right now. Warm as always, I'm sure. I pass the huge coastal rock jutting out from the water, my signal that I'm nearly back to my condo.

I throw the door open once I get there. Despite the cold I'm drenched in sweat. I reach my desk and read Javier's letter for the millionth time. He asks me about my life here, and how it's treating me. He tells me Columbia misses me, and that he does too. My heart warms. Before I jump in the shower, I decide to quickly write him a response. At the bottom, I include an inside joke from a conversation that seems decades ago now.

'P.S. - Don't go punching any strangers while I'm gone. Love, Isabel.'

I miss Javier. Miss him so much it hurts. Our brief time together forged a bond between us I can't comprehend. I've spent many nights thinking of the kiss we shared. How his hands roamed over my body. It still gives me chills.

Even though he's not here, the memories continue to help me heal from the pain of my past.

It's been nearly a year since I boarded the plane from Columbia. Javier had been right. Moving back here was the best thing for me. I've felt more myself than I have in a long time.

My best friend, Melody, has been great. She's put her social life on hold to be there for me in any way she can. We've spent countless nights making hit or miss dinners and watching tooth rotting rom coms. She also referred me to a counselor the first week I got here, which has helped me in immeasurable ways. It's made me face my trauma, but also helped me cope with it.

Slowly, but surely, the empty piece of myself is filling back up. I still get nightmares, though, and I hate walking the streets by myself, especially at night. I'm wary of strange men, and I never go anywhere without pepper spray. I still miss my mother terribly. And my father. Remembering Columbia brings joy and pain.

There are good days and bad days, but I now have a hope for my future that wasn't there a year ago.

I wrap up a mug to send to Javier along with my letter. I've taken up pottery in the past months and it has been one of the many things to help me cope. I wonder what he'll think of the blue and gold painted creation.

The phone rings. It's Melody.

"Are you down for grabbing some Mexican tonight? There's a new place that just opened up downtown I've been wanting to try. Maybe we could catch a late movie afterwards?"

It was a Friday and I had no plans for the evening.

"Sounds fun, let's do it."

"Awesome! There is one thing though. I just put my car in the shop, is there anyway you could swing my place before?"

"Yeah, that should work. I'll pick you up around six."

"You're the best. See you then. Love ya."

"You too."

We say goodbye.

Later, I get ready for the night. Pulling a powder blue blouse over my head, I glance down at my bedside clock. I have a few minutes before I go to pick up Melody. I grab my keys, purse, and phone before heading out. I run back in, having forgotten Melody's gift. She went out of town for her birthday last week so I never had a chance to give her the gift I made. The intricate cake stand took hours, but I know she'll enjoy using it at her bakery. There's no bag, but it's too late to worry about now. I place it in the passenger seat and head out.

It's nearly dark when I get there. I hate driving to her place. It's cradled in between dense woods on either side and completely devoid of neighbors. I groan as my car reaches the dirt road leading up to her cabin. The looming trees extinguish most of the sun's fading light. As I reach the end of the drive way, I pull out my phone to tell her I'm here. I wait a few minutes but no answer. I'll just go up to the door.

I grab her present from the front seat and step out of my car. The damp earth cakes the bottom of my shoe as I tread up to the entrance of Melody's house. I knock, but she doesn't come. The lights are on, and I can hear music coming from inside. She must not hear me.

I twist the knob. It's unlocked. The minute I step inside I know something is off. Nothing seems to be out of place, but the atmosphere settles around me in a disquieting way.

"Melody, I'm here!" I yell towards the towards the top of the stairs.

Still nothing.

Something is wrong. I'm scared to go upstairs, but I do it anyway. I force myself to put one foot in front of the other. The panicky feeling I haven't had in a while creeps back in.

I hear the cake stand fall from my arms and shatter to a million pieces when I reach the top.

The lower half of Melody's body lies in front of me. The rest is hidden by the half closed bedroom door. I rush towards her, praying she's alive.

She's bleeding. It's everywhere.

"Melody! Melody!" My heart threatens to burst out of my chest. "Can you hear me, Melody? Answer me!"

She lies still. Somewhere deep down I know my friend is gone. As soon as my gaze shifts to her face I involuntarily fling myself from her.

A shard of glass sticks out from one eye. Everything is such a mess I didn't notice it at first. I sob loudly, barely recognizing my own voice. Slowly, I shift onto my knees towards her. I reach out for her hand, noticing the scrap of paper clutched in its grasp. I unfold the scrap between sobs.

Ojo por ojo.

An eye for an eye. The phrase has been written in blood.

I run down the stairs and back to my car as fast as my body will allow me. I yank my phone from my purse and dial the police.

It doesn't all set in until after the police have rolled her body away, pronouncing her dead at the scene. They ask me all the normal questions and I robotically answer. I'm a million miles away. They ask me about the note then. I tell them I knew it's meaning the moment I read it. I explain to them everything that happened in Columbia. Their next step is to contact Officer Santiago to fill him in on the situation and decide on how to proceed.

I don't go home that night. They assign me to the Witness Protection Program and place me under guard in a remote location an hour away.

As I'm sitting at the tiny home's kitchen table, my phone buzzes. I recognize the number and pick up on the first ring.

"Javi," my voice is shaky and barely there.

"Isabel, I just heard what happened. Are you safe?"

"I'm f- fine. I'm in the middle of nowhere, but there's guards with me."

He pauses and I hear a heavy sigh on the other end.

"Fuck, Isabel. I'm- I'm sorry this is happening."

"It's not your fault."

"It is. We should've caught these guys by now. The fact that they left the country and weren't even on our radar- this is a fucking mess."

I try to hide my cries but he must sense it anyway. Something about hearing his voice after everything that's happened makes me finally let go.

"Shh. Don't cry. Listen, I'm gonna come up there. I can get on a plane within a couple days."

"No, Javier, you can't do that."

         "They traveled countries to get to you, Isabel. I have to-"

"No, you can't do anything from here. The police are taking care of me, Javi. I'll be okay. I can't keep you from doing what you can to catch them."

We go back and forth but he finally decides to stay in Columbia as long as I update him each day. We say our goodbyes, and I almost beg him to come to me. I crave his arms. But I can't bring myself to be that selfish.

Being cooped up in the hide out cabin reminds me of my boredom back at the hospital in Columbia. I'm not allowed to leave and there's little to do here. I have endless amounts of books though. I skip the murder mysteries, preferring to drown myself in the pile of vintage romance novels tucked away in a rusty cabinet. Melody would have loved these books. She was a sucker for this stuff.

I've had to stop myself from picking up the phone to call her more times than I can count. It may not be medically possible, but I swear my heart physically aches at the thought of my best friend. I'd known her my entire life. I couldn't imagine life without her. I couldn't have imagined life without my mother and father either, but here I am. Life was cruel thing, hungry for peace and stealing it when you least expect.

After several days spent in solitude at the hide out, one of my guards informs me we are taking a trip back to the station. I ask what for, but am given no answer.

Once there, I'm informed I am to go back to Columbia. Javier's task force has caught Matías. I am the only one that can positively identify him.

I grip the seat beneath me.

It seems Columbia is not done with me yet.

[ilooklikeaburntchickenugget]

Rumors

A/N: Another one-shot for you guys, because I’m bored and though of an idea. Word count: 2021 Pairing: Gerard Way x F!Reader

If there was one thing Gerard has taught you, it was that having shitty thoughts and feelings were normal.

It was just especially difficult for you and your desk job to cope with that. He now had music, which was going extremely well. You were so proud of him and everyone else, but you weren’t happy. Not because of him, but because of yourself.

“Hey, Gee.” You stumbled into your small Jersey apartment at 9 pm on a Tuesday night, your boyfriend on the couch watching something.

“Oh, hey.” He smiled, looking over at you. He immediately noticed your mood. He knew you struggled with depression, but some days were worst than others. “How was your day?” 

“Meh.” You said putting your bag down and hanging up your coat. The harsh Jersey winter had finally arrived, a dusting of snow settled on the ground.

“Have you eaten?” He asked you shook your head.

“I’m not hungry.” You admitted, walking over to where he was and sitting next to him.

“Be honest with me,” He turned to face you, “How are you doing?” You knew better than to lie, Gerard was like a lie detector with you. Anything you said he could easily decipher whether it was a lie or wasn’t.

“Not well,” You leaned back, slouching on the old couch you two had, “I just feel so drained.” He nodded.

“Well, I’m not going to tell you it’s okay, because that would be a load of bull shit.” He said, “But how can I help?” 

“I don’t know.” You said, “Just, be close to me, maybe?” He nodded, throwing an arm around you and grabbing a blanket from one of the arms of the furniture, placing it over your two bodies. He gave you a long kiss on the head, relaxing into the Star Wars movie marathon that was on.

One of the things that you knew was causing this issue was Gerard’s fame. It was by no means his fault or the bands, but Three Cheers for Sweet Revenge had blown up. And next thing you knew, you were bombarded with co-workers, acquaintances, everyone you even remotely were trying to be friendly with you. But you were smart enough to know it was because of your relationship with Gerard. Two years and a lot had changed.

His fingers had found their way interlocked into strands of your hair, dancing with them and providing an even more relaxing feeling for you. “Tell me why you feel like this.” He told you, your eyes still fixated on the TV.

“I’m just sick of fake people, ya know?” You said, beginning to play with your fingers, “Feeling used.” 

“You feel used?” He asked, now concerned, “By who? By me?” 

“No, no, of course not.” You let him know, “It’s just, honestly? People want to ya know, know me for you. And I get that, you’re an awesome person, and now you’re famous, but still.” He nodded.

“I’m sorry.” He reassured you, sighing, “Maybe we don’t be as public about us?” 

“Yeah, but I don’t want to be a burden on you-” 

“I’ve thought about this for a while too.” He reassured you, “I want our life, our relationship, to be as normal as possible.”

“Are you sure, Gee?” “Yeah, I’m sure.” You leaned up giving him a kiss, him giving one back, and leaned back into him afterward.

“Thank you.” You said.

“No need to thank me.” He said, “We both need to be comfortable with this, right?” 

“Right.” You responded.

And that worked. For a few months. Until their fame blew up even more, and more and more.

Gerard and you had decided to make public appearances together very simple, by wearing sunglasses and hats. Trying not to get mauled by paparazzi. But one day, in particular, you went to the grocery store like a regular person, and within hours you were all over gossip news.

“What the fuck?” You muttered, looking on your and Gerard’s computer at the countless articles with your name splashed on the front, and picture placed right below.

Is Y/F/N Y/L/N pregnant?

Gerard Way expectant father!

Y/F/N Y/L/N seen grocery shopping, pregnancy rumors spark

You shut down the computer, huffing out of frustration and getting up to take a shower. Gee and the guys were on tour at the moment, and the only way this wasn’t going to drive you insane was to take care of yourself.

The warm water hit your bare skin. You took a few deep breaths but looked down at your stomach fat which was mistaken today for a pregnancy. Maybe I do look pregnant? You thought. I should lose weight. The thoughts continued to run in your mind. When was the last time Gerard and I had sex? It had been months. Oh no he thinks I’m fat too. He thinks I’m disgusting.

So there you stood in the shower for an additional 45 minutes, before getting out and drying yourself off. You stood in the bathroom mirror, looking at the fat rolls that laid on your side, the fat on your stomach, and your thick thighs. He doesn’t like my body.

You changed into sweatpants and a t-shirt, sitting on your bed. You checked your phone, noticing three missed calls from Gerard. You took a deep breath and reluctantly called him back. “Hey, are you alright?” He asked.

“Yeah, of course.” You put on the most realistic, regular voice you could.

“Did you see the reports?” Both of you paused. 

“Yeah, I did.”

“You know they’re some fucking bull shit, right?” He asked.

“Right.” You said.

“Wait, are you pregnant?” 

“No, Gee I’m not.” You sighed, “I’m just fat.” 

“You’re not fat.” He fired back. And that was enough for you to break down in tears. “Shit.” You could hear him mutter. “Listen I-” 

“You have to go, I know.” You said through tears.

“No, I’m not going fucking anywhere.” 

“Gee, it’s like 8 pm there. It’s time for you to go out there.” 

“I don’t give a single shit.” He said, “You’re not fucking fat, okay? You’re the most gorgeous fucking woman on this fucking planet and screw all the shit those asses say about you.” 

“Gee, I’m good.” 

“You’re crying.”

“Yeah, but I’ll get through it, okay? Just please, go out there and play.” 

“Fine.” He sighed, “But I love you. So fucking much.” 

“I love you too.” You whispered and hung up. You slumped under the covers, turning off your phone and lights and going to bed.

Thankfully, the following morning was a Saturday. You woke up, stretching out and yawning. Grabbing your phone, you turned it on only for texts to be flooding your screen. You sat up in confusion, checking some of them.

Did you see what Gerard did? Y/N, it’s insane!

The video’s gone viral!

What video? You thought, swinging yourself over the bed and to the computer. You quickly turned it on, logging in, and searched up Gee’s name, waiting for results to come up. There, lo and behold, all over the internet held a video of him on stage that had gone viral. So of course, you clicked on it.

“How many of you here are girls?” He asked, no music playing. Part of the crowd cheered. “Well, I want to tell every single one of you, that you are all fucking beautiful, in your very own fucking way.” The crowd roared. “And I’m sick and tired of the fucking bull shit, that the media likes to stir regarding women and their bodies.” The crowd went even wilder, “Because all women are beautiful. And all you guys, you guys are handsome. And everyone here is fucking hot.” Everyone managed to get even louder for that.

You knew it was of course him directing it at the rumors regarding you. And you were honestly quite thankful for it. But you were still worried that you weren’t enough in his eyes anymore.

You got ready for a day at home, which would most likely consist of cleaning and cooking for yourself, with maybe some reading or TV involved in there too. After cooking breakfast, you got a call from Gerard. “Hey, Gee.” You picked up.

“Hey, honey.” He said. “How are you?” 

“Good, how about you?”

“Alright.” He said. “I- I think we should talk about the rumors. I know you’re still upset, and I am too.” You sighed.

“Gee, I appreciate what you did on stage last night.” 

“It needed to be said.” He spoke with confidence, “Someone needed to at least. And you know I don’t give a fuck.”

“Yeah, I know Gee.” You said.

“What’s on your mind?” He asked. You didn’t answer, “Please, tell me. Please?” You sighed.

“I don’t know if I can.” 

“If you can?” He asked, “You can tell me anything.” 

“Do you still love me?” You asked, pain erupting in every word. He didn’t respond for a few moments.

“What the fuck are you talking about?” He asked, “Are you drunk?” 

“No, I’m not Gerard.” You said, “Do you still love me?” 

“Yes, of course, I fucking love you. More than anything.” 

“Do you love my body?” You asked next, “Am I unattractive to you?” You could hear him sigh.

“Why would you think that?” 

“Because I know I’m chubby.” You said, “And we haven’t had sex in forever. So I just thought-” 

“Your body is fucking beautiful.” He said, “You’re the most gorgeous woman on this planet, on the inside and the out. I love every inch of you and you better know that and understand that because I really do.” He took a moment to breathe, “And I swear, the first thing I’m doing when I get a break is taking you right there against the fucking wall. I’ve been dreaming about you every single day since I left.” You weren’t sure how to respond.

“I love you, Gerard.” You said.

“I love you too, Y/N.” He responded, “Are you okay now?”

“Yeah, I think so.”

“I’m gonna be home in the next three weeks, okay? We have a break.” 

“Sounds great.” You lightly smiled.

“I do love you, Y/N.” 

“I love you too, Gee. Bye.” You two hung up.

The next few weeks went by slowly, day by day slugging yourself in and almost immediately crashed onto the bed. One night, after passing out almost immediately post changing. You snuggled into the covers, falling asleep instantly.

It wasn’t uncommon you woke up in the middle of the night, but when you felt a shift in your bed you knew it wasn’t insomnia. You stirred a little bit, groaning slightly. “Hey, babe.” You heard a familiar voice. You still weren’t completely in your conscious.

“Hey, Gee.” You responded out of instinct rolling back over.

“Try to get some sleep, okay?” He asked you could feel him shift under the covers.

“Mhm.” You murmured into your pillow, falling right back asleep.

But of course the next morning, you noticed the slant in the mattress as well as the warmth which radiated from the usually empty side of the bed. “Gee?” You asked, rolling over slightly to face him.

“Hey,” He muttered, still half asleep.

“You’re back.” He nodded against the pillow. “Oh, well, I missed you.” He lightly chuckled.

“I missed you too, sugar.” You two laid there for a few content, silent moments before speaking up.

“How long are you back for?” You asked next.

“Four days.” He said, smirking immediately after.

“What?” You asked.

“I think I made a promise.” He got up, getting above you and smiling down, giving you a kiss.

“Gee,” You said, pulling away, “Can I get five more minutes of sleep?” He sighed, slumping back down next to you.

“Really? Now?” 

“Yes, now, Gee.” You smiled, knowing you had just pissed him off.

“If you’re hard you can always-” 

“No, I’ll wait.” He sighed again and you lightly laughed. “You find this funny?” 

“I don’t find it funny,” You clarified, “I find it absolutely hilarious.”

“You’re so beautiful.” He smiled. You groaned.

“Thanks.” You said, “You’re gorgeous too Gerard.”

[0ceanoflight]

My thoughts on Gaya Sa Pelikula now that I've watched all 8 eps.

Cause I need to write down my thoughts and Twitter's character limit just isn't enough so thank you tumblr. This is gonna be a rant

Also, just wanna say this is from the point of view of a gay trans masc enby, aka me.

First impression

Gaya Sa Pelikula is just.... Wow. It's hard to describe. I originally watched it cause some moots on Twitter kept talking about it and they recommended it to me. It doesn't take much for me to watch a gay show, so of course I checked it out. At the time I think maybe 2-3 eps were out.

I knew nothing about the plot. I had no expectations for it. Just hoping it didn't have any problematic stuff in it, hopefully some cute stuff, same as any other gay show. It was just some show to watch to pass the time. I was wrong. It's so much more than just a good show. It's rare for me to get THIS emotionally invested into a show.

From the first ep I thought "Oh, this is pretty realistic lol. I've said stuff like this", referring to Vlad's lines. That continued as I watched the remaining available eps. Later my moots mentioned that it was written by a gay man and I understood right away. GSP is a gay show with the intention of being very realistic. It wasn't just gay for entertainment's sake. It was gay for the sake for real gay people.

Characters

The characters are so well written. They are flawed. They're not perfect. They all have their own struggles that you wouldn't know until you sat down and talked to them. Their lines and personalities are real. They feel real. I've met people like that. I have friends like that. I see myself in them. Also the acting is incredible. Really brought it to the next level.

The Music

A golden sound track. Every song just fit. It felt like the songs were made for that scene. The lyrics, the vibe. There were so many times when I thought that lyrics perfectly fit the scene in a way that would make me connect even more to what was happening. Really couldn't have been better. 10/10.

The visuals and plot devices

The way everything seems to have a purpose. Everything seems to be interconnected. There were so many things that were mentioned earlier in the episode, or I'm previous episodes that you originally didn't fully understand, then they would come back and suddenly *mindblown*.

The lines in the first prom dancing scene in the first ep. The ghost stories (still blows my mind). Vlad not liking his hair being touch which wasn't explained till later. The keychain. The theme song test. The movie they were watching about the imaginary beach (I forgot the name). The reason behind Judit's seemingly fake/weird ally speeches. The reason why Karl always seemed so stiff and awkward. The closet. The orca. The remote. Ect.

All of that came back later in the show and added so much depth. The metaphors used seemed to almost add extra explainations. Like... they didn't just give more layers of complexity, but it gave us a stronger understanding of what was going on. Or at least it made it more emotional. Idk. I was just one of he people who read posts of others dissecting the show cause I'm not as good. Lol.

Also there were beautiful scenes visually. Karl's dance scene. Beautiful. The film scenes outside, looked gorgeous. The use of mirrors and the TV. Great. Awesome

Connections

There were a lot of things I connected to.

Vlad's lines like I mentioned above were among the first. I've personally said or thought very similar things. Or even those exact things. I was actually shocked at first. By how real that felt for me.

Vlad being lonely, but faking it. Aha. I'm an introvert, and people know it. As much as I need space, I get lonely very easily as well. And friends online sometimes aren't enough. It's not the same as having someone there. With covid, and the fact that all of my friends live far away or are normally too busy to meet up, I very rarely am actually with friends. It almost hurts tbh. Especially since I'm a very affectionate person. Also the gay yearning hours are real and powerful.

Karl's dance scene, letting out the inner femininity. So I'm a bit different. I never came out as gay. I'm a gay trans guy. People already knew, or assumed, I liked men. However I did have the struggle of inner femininity. I hated fem things up until I was maybe 15-16, maybe almost 17. I didn't know why I hated it, I just did. Clearly now I know why. However my evolution to being a fem guy from hating fem things happened around the same time as discovering I'm not actually a girl. It was confusing 3 years (yes it took me about 3 years to piece everything together, a bit longer to settle). My point is, once I opened up to fem things, it was beautiful. It really really was. I felt more comfortable. I felt freer. I went from "ew makeup, skirts, leggings, pink. I hate it". To wearing makeup, wearing leggings, liking pink, often painting my nails. I've worn pretty short shorts with a loose t-shirt and a cardigan. Peak fem. Felt great. I want to wear a skirt, but I'm too afraid to do that. I may feel better with being fem, but society is still society and I might get looks cause "wtf, a man wearing a skirt?". Maybe one day. Uhhh anyways. The times I've grown to become more fem felt like how watching Karl dance felt like. Just like that.

Karl's struggle with his sexuality. Ok again I can't relate on the gay part, cause my coming out was coming out at trans. However yea. That was an adventure. I remember being so confused in 8th grade & 9th grade. God that was.... something. At first I thought I just wanted to be more tomboyish, more androgynous. So I found androgynous girls with short hair and said "I want this". Everyone was confused. My friends said "is there a reason you cut your hair so short?". I was afraid of that question. At the time I didn't know why I was so afraid. I don't remember exactly what I said, but tbh I was pretty defensive. Of course I later realized why I felt that way. I remember finally figuring things out after I settled into knowing I was trans, I didn't know how to come out. I couldn't say it directly. In fact, I never did. To my friends I just said "he/him, they/them pronouns" when asked at events, and of course they knew, but didn't ask more. In fact one friend found out cause I wrote "agender" on a form cause he looked over my shoulder. For my family... I just dropped a big hint, and they understood something was up. I wasn't able to explain it well then either. It took another 2-3 months till I couldn't take it anymore and did my best to explain it better so they would take it seriously. I was afraid. I couldn't say it directly. I actually didn't come out to my my high school. I was too afraid. I had friends who were out and I was jealous. I was jealous of their bravery. Same as Karl to Vlad. I was out to friends, but couldn't be open in the real world, much like Karl. I was only out within the space of the GSA, and of the local lgbt center. That was my "apartment". It was only until after i graduated where I promised myself I would live my real self.

The prom dance scene. I missed my high school's prom too. I wasn't brave enough to wear a suit. That would be like coming out and I wasn't ready. So I missed that. I wouldn't have been able to be open of course. I went to the senior dinner. I guess that was the start of me trying to be open. I went in a suit. Tailored men's dress pants too. I went with friends.

Wanting to write my own stories. That's a big one isn't it? I never really do see myself in films or tv. An autistic mentally ill gay trans masc enby? Yea, not a thing. Not a popular role in hollywood, will never be. I'm not a writer, I wanted to be as a kid, I was going to go to uni for writing, but I'm not really good enough for that. I really really do want to see more of myself in media. I wish I could be able to create such things for other people as well. Cause things like Gaya Sa Pelikula are truly magical. It literally made me cry whenever something I related to happened.

[writersplanetarium]

Facade: New Beginnings

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 11 Part 12

Aelin and Rowan: The Burning Hatred Between Them

Aelin sighed as she spotted another article about her and Rowan. It’d been a few months since she’d gone and spilled the beans, and the news sites were still talking about it. She and Rowan had since developed a... friendship of sorts. After they’d confessed to each other what they hadn’t dared tell anyone else, they found themselves in a sort of in between place with each other, not sure whether they were going to settle for being friendly coworkers, aquaintences, or close friends. Aelin was trying for friendship, and he wasn’t pushing back, which was a good sign.

Now that they were actually getting along, the articles were pointless, but Aelin knew if she went out now and said they’d made up, it’d seem like a publicity stunt. Oh, who was she kidding, she knew no matter when she did it, it’d seem like a publicity stunt. It had worked in their favor though. They were still the hot topic, especially since everyone was loving the new season of the show and their character’s budding romance.

She had even missed him a little when he went home to spend the holidays with his family. However, with Rowan gone, Aelin could have a party at her house, so she had everyone over for the holidays and not risk upsetting the delicate balance of their relationship. It was a nice, family-friendly party filled with all her favorite people. And yet somehow she found herself looking out the window and sighing at the empty house next door.

She tried not to let her mind linger on the man. Tried not to think of how he’d started waving at her when she’d drink her coffee on her porch before his morning run. Tried not to think about how she’d catch him taking the garbage out at ungodly hours of the morning rather than the night before like a normal person. Or how he’d always get his mail after he’d been working out, so he was sweaty and shirtless. She definitely wasn’t letting herself think about any of that.

But now Rowan was back, the holidays were over, and they’d gotten their new scripts. He’d come right over once he’d put his stuff away and eaten dinner for the reading. And despite their new friendship of sorts, Rowan scrunched up his nose at the first scene, and Aelin finally set her phone aside, putting the articles out of her mind.

“Really?” He asked, “A sex scene right off the bat?”

“We’re supposed to be in love, Rowan, what did you expect?” She laughed, “They’re giving the people what they want.”

“But why does it have to be sex? There are more ways to show affection, to show they’ve grown closer.”

“Yes, but this is the most fanservicey,” Aelin said. She prodded his leg with her foot. “Don’t worry, though, I’ll be gentle with you. I only bite a little.” He rolled his eyes but seemed to be fighting a smile.

“Let’s just get on with it. Your line’s first,” he said.

“You mean the various sounds of pleasure?” She teased. He gave her a flat look. “Okay. Okay. Let’s see.” She flipped open the script. In the middle of their intense moment together, a loud knock on the door startles them both. Charlotte speaks, breathlessly. ”Who is it?” Aelin called.

“It’s Henry,” Rowan said, reading Fenrys’ part. Charlotte and Daemion give each other a panicked look as they see the time and notice they’re late.

“Just a minute!” Aelin said with a bit of franticness in her voice. They both jump out of bed, Charlotte clutching the sheets around her, and Daemion grabbing his underwear from just beside the bed, the both of them racing around the room to get dressed. “Dae, where’d you throw my underwear?”

“I didn’t throw them anywhere,” Rowan replied, “You did. Check by the dresser.” Charlotte continues to look, not checking by the dresser.

“Seriously Dae, I need-” She turns, finding Daemion half-dressed, holding her underwear up by a finger.

“I told you to check by the dresser,” he said.

“Whatever,” she laughed. Charlotte quickly dresses and pulls her messy hair back before turning back to Daemion, who’s dressed as well. She steps closer to him, lacing their fingers, pulling him down to her. “I’ll catch you later.” She kisses him intensely, and when they pull apart, neither seems to want to let go. “I love you.”

“I love you more,” he replies.

“I love you most,” she says. They part fully and Charlotte grabs her bag and puts it on. She makes her way to the door where Henry is waiting. “I do expect you to finish what you started.”

“Always,” he says. He presses a quick kiss to her neck before letting her slip out of the room to meet with Henry. We see him give a fond look at the door, thinking about the girl who just slipped out of it.

“Aw, that’s cute,” Aelin comments. Rowan makes a small sound of half agreement, clearly just wanting to keep working.

So they did. They went through the rest of the script, reading through their lines. It was... odd, now, though. It was easier to read scripts and act with him when she hated his guts, but now... Now it had a different energy to it. Now... it was more tender. Awkward. They were practically friends now, and she had to pretend to be in love with him. To want him. Though if Rowan picked up on the feeling, or felt anything was off himself, he didn’t mention it.

So Aelin brushed it off.

“You want something to drink?” She asked as they finished off the episode.

“Sure,” he said, reclining into her couch, “What have you got?”

“Water, wine, apple juice, and milk.”

“Water’s fine,” he said. She nodded, grabbing him a cup of water and pouring herself a glass of wine.

When she returned to her living room, she caught sight of Lysandra in her kitchen window, grinning like a lion that just caught a gazelle. Rowan was flipping through his phone, so he didn’t notice her staring, but Aelin most certainly did. She saw her best friend lift her phone, and Aelin knew she was texting her.

“Thanks,” Rowan said, his eyes still on his phone as she set the cup down. Aelin’s phone buzzed, and she scowled at Lysandra but picked it up anyway.

It looks like a certain SOMEONE is getting quite comfortable on your couch

He came over to run lines, Lys. Trust me he’s not getting too comfy.

Well he didn’t just run out as soon as you were done. That’s a good sign

It’s weird being nice, and then having to pretend we’re in love. 

You two have a new dynamic now. You just have to adapt your acting to suit it. Which you’ll get the hang of in no time. I mean if you can pretend to be in love with him when you hate him, you can do it when you like him. You’re both professionals, so if you’re worried about him thinking you LIKE like him, remember he knows you’re acting.

Aelin rolled her eyes.

I can see you rolling your eyes, you know.

Aelin laughed lightly.

I’m not worried about anything. It’s just... different. 

Embrace the change, Ace, embrace the change.

Aelin looked up at Lysandra through the window and her friend winked before heading deeper into her house where Aelin could no longer see her.

“You want to watch something?” Aelin asked, taking a long sip of her wine.

“Do you have anything good?” He asked.

“By your standards? No,” Aelin said, “But even grouchy old men like you need to enjoy a movie so bad it’s good every once in a while.”

“I’m barely older than you,” he said with a flat look.

“Old. Man,” she said again with a grin, poking him in the arm with her foot just enough to nudge him. He rolled his eyes.

“We’re going to watch an awful movie,” Aelin said, “And you’re going to love it.”

“Are we to the point yet that you can force me to watch bad movies?” He asked. She picked up the remote.

“Just got there, Buzzard.”

********

Rowan glanced at Aelin as she watched the movie with mirth in her eyes. It was awful. Cheesy times ten with the most Rom Com dialogue he’d ever heard. It reminded him of his first movie, an awful thing that filled him with regret every time he thought about it. But... he liked watching it with Aelin. Despite the fact that he’d never admit it out loud, she was actually pretty funny, and her commentary amused him to no end.

“Yes, of course I’ll go on a week long vacation with you, man I’ve only known for three days.”

“Yes, definitely walk up and stand that close to me while I’m not looking.”

“Of course I’ll marry you after not even knowing you three weeks! We’re soulmates.”

It actually made him smile. It was a nice shift from the awkward tension earlier while they read their lines. It hadn’t gone badly, but it sure as hell just felt... different. That wasn’t necessarily a bad thing, but where things used to be all spark and anger fueling them to try and be better, they were just... there with each other. Somehow, the comfort brought discomfort that the movie helped to reduce.

“You enjoyed that,” Aelin said, moving closer to him.

“I did not,” he lied.

“You did too!” She laughed, “You liked that! You thought it was fun. Look, you’re smiling.” She poked his cheek and he rolled his eyes, dropping the smile.

“I’m going home.”

“No!” She said, grabbing his arm, “You have to stay and watch more bad movies with me.”

“I have to do no such thing,” he said, “Besides, it’s getting late, and you’ve had a whole bottle of wine.”

“One more movie,” she said, “Just one more. This one’s the best.”

“Aelin-”

“Too late, it’s already playing,” she said, picking up the remote and selecting the new movie. He rolled his eyes, but watched anyway.

Usually when he went back home for the holidays, he was glad to be away from Aelin. His family could get crazy, for sure, but they didn’t blast their music so much he could feel it in his feet over a hundred feet away. But this time... He’d actually wanted to come back to her.

She didn’t move back to her spot as the movie started, having made herself comfortable with barely a foot’s worth of space between them. So close he could smell the mix of her jasmine soap and the wine she’d downed. He promptly ignored it. 

She was going strong for the first thirty minutes with her witty remarks and full laughter, but at around forty five minutes it started to die down and her laughter turned to huffs and her sentences turned to words, trailing off to less and less until her head hit his shoulder.

“Aelin?” He looked over at her. She was out cold. He let out a sigh, grabbing the remote. He hit pause on the movie and shifted, gently laying her down on the couch. He tucked a pillow under her head and pulled the blanket off the back, laying it over her.

He turned on his phone’s flashlight as he shut off the TV so he’d be able to find his way out. He paused when he looked at her sleeping, peaceful figure in the dark, only the moonlight coming in through the window illuminating her. He patted her head gently, pushing her hair out of her face, before making his way back home, collapsing into his bed to find himself with dreams filled with that familiar bubble of laughter.

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[noona-clock]

I Never Knew - Part 4

Genre: WWII!AU

Pairing: Brian (Day6) x You (Female!Reader)

Warning: Mentions of war

Part 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, Epilogue | Words: 3,296

*gif courtesy of @cramelot​​​

As soon as you swung your legs over the side of your bed the next morning, you knew without one single doubt that your father would ask you about your date last night. And he would want details.

I mean, he was a general in the military, first of all. Of course, he wanted all the information he could get. And he was your father, second of all. You were his only daughter -- his only child!

He had always been a bit overprotective, and it had only intensified once your mother passed away. Now that you made up his entire family world, he felt it was his duty to be there for you as much as he possibly could.

...Well. That’s how he put it. In reality, ‘be there for you’ really meant ‘pry into your life.’

He meant well, though, and you loved him dearly.

But, still. It’s not like you were looking forward to telling him about your date with Brian. Telling him you felt like you’d found your soulmate less than two days after meeting him. There’s no way he would take that even remotely well.

You knew he was downstairs at the kitchen table eating breakfast right now, and if you didn’t join him soon... The only times you didn’t come down to join him for breakfast were when you were sick, and when that happened, he always came to check up on you. 

So, either way, you would have to talk to him. And you’d never been able to lie to your father. He was a general, for goodness sake. Not only would he be able to tell you were lying, but he would certainly know how to get the truth out of you eventually.

With a soft but anxious sigh, you stood up and shuffled over to retrieve your robe and slippers.

The second you set foot downstairs you heard your father clear his throat.

That was not a coincidence.

“Good morning, Daddy,” you called out as you made your way down the hallway.

When you appeared in the doorway to the kitchen, your father rose his eyebrows and shot you a grin. “Cupcake!” He sounded like he was surprised to see you -- as if he hadn’t been waiting for you to come downstairs. “Good morning.”

He lifted his mug and took a sip of his coffee as you headed to the fridge for your morning apple. You wondered to yourself how long he could hold out before asking about your date.

And when you slid into the chair across from him just a minute later, you got your answer.

“Did you have a good time last night?” he asked casually, though you knew he was holding himself back from asking about every single detail.

“I did,” you answered with a smile. “A very good time.”

“And this... Brian, is it? He’s --”

“A perfect gentleman,” you interrupted. And you figured you might as well answer his unasked questions, too. “I know I just met him, but I really like him, Daddy. He’s not like any other guy I’ve ever met, and... I don’t know. It just feels... different.”

For some reason, you expected your father to dismiss your feelings and tell you to be careful. He was a more pragmatic sort of man, so you just imagined he wouldn’t believe in something like “love at first sight.”

But, to your surprise, he set down his coffee cup and gazed across the table at you with a very wistful look in his eyes.

“You sound like me when I met your mother,” he said softly. “I knew from the second I laid eyes on her that she was the woman I would fall in love with. From then on, I never thought about anyone else.”

You slowly set your apple down on the placemat in front of you, your brow furrowing gently as you listened to his words.

“...Really?” you whispered.

He nodded, one corner of his lips tugging into a nostalgic half-smile. “I asked her to marry me after a month, and you came along a year later.”

You’d known your parents hadn’t been married long before your mother got pregnant with you, but you hadn’t known they’d gotten engaged after only a month. Neither of them had ever told you that. Or maybe you had just never asked.

But now you were curious. More than curious.

“How did it feel when you met her?” you asked, resting an elbow on the table and leaning forward slightly in your chair.

“Well,” he sighed. “It felt... like I knew my life had just changed. That’s the easiest way to describe it. I just... knew.”

Your heart skipped a beat inside your chest, and you inhaled shakily before saying, “That’s how I feel. Like I just know I’m going to fall in love with him.”

It felt strange saying that to your father, but his smile actually grew after you told him.

“You don’t know how glad I am to hear that,” he said, reaching across and holding out his hand to you. You slid your fingers into his palm, and he grasped them tightly. “The last thing I want is for you to get hurt, but I trust you. I love you. You’re the last piece of your mother I have left, and the only thing I want is for you to be happy.”

Tears filled your eyes as you nodded, the lump of emotion forming in your throat making it difficult to say anything.

And then your father’s gaze quickly transformed into one of stern gravity. “But I’m still going to need to meet this young man to make sure he’s good enough for you.”

A breathless chuckle escaped through your nose, and you murmured, “Yes, of course, Daddy.”

He squeezed your hand once more before letting it go and continuing eating his breakfast. You did the same, picking up your apple and crunching into it. And, as you chewed, you couldn’t stop a smile from pulling at your lips. You’d thought your father would think you were crazy or that he wouldn’t believe you and would forbid you from seeing Brian again. You’d been fairly certain he wouldn’t take your news well... but it had been quite the opposite.

You didn’t normally like to be proven wrong, but in this situation, you were more than delighted.

Once your father headed off to work, you went back upstairs to get ready for another day of volunteering at the hospital. You intended to stay much longer today, even if you did see Brian visiting his injured chum. Cat, the head nurse, seemed like someone you wanted to become friends with, and you weren’t going to make a good impression on her if you only volunteered for an hour or so at a time.

So, as you approached the hospital doors about twenty minutes later, you resolved to work hard, long, and distraction-free. 

The first person you saw upon opening the door, however, was Cat, who was leaning against the reception desk with a sly smirk on her red lips. And the first thing she said was, “How was your date last night?”

You paused, your head jerking back slightly in surprise. “Uh -- what -- how --”

“I was at the movie theatre,” she told you with a casual half-shrug. “I saw you two, and you looked mighty cozy during that movie.”

Almost instantly, your cheeks began to burn, and they were obviously turning pink because Cat’s smirk became even more sly.

She leaned closer to you, nudging you gently with her elbow and waggling her eyebrows. “How was it, huh? Everything you wanted it to be?”

You let out a breathless chuckle before answering her. “...Everything... and more,” you muttered bashfully.

Cat squealed, much to your embarrassment, and clapped her hands together gleefully. “Oh, I told you I’m a sucker for a good love story!”

And that gave you the perfect segue to change the subject. “Speaking of, didn’t you like the movie?”

Cat let her hands fall to her side, the joy slowly leaving her expression as she shrugged. “It was all right. Cary Grant’s not really my type.”

Unsurprisingly, your brow furrowed deeply and your eyes widened. “Excuse me? He’s not -- what is your type then?!”

Because how could Cary Grant not be someone’s type?!

“He’s too... I don’t want to say masculine, but I don’t know how else to describe it,” she responded. “I like a man I can take care of, not one who wants to take care of me. I’m plenty able to do that myself.”

...Okay, when she put it that way, it made a whole lot more sense. “I’m guessing that’s why you became a nurse,” you pointed out. “So you could take care of people and not the other way around.”

“Precisely,” Cat nodded, her lips curving into a proud grin. “Now, if you’ll follow me, I’ve got some more laundry to fold.”

She turned on her heel, and you began to follow her down the hallway. All this talk of men and types had you curious, though. You weren’t normally one to pry, but... I mean, Cat knew far more about your dating life than anyone else, so you figured it wouldn’t be totally out of line to ask.

“Do you have a boyfriend, then?” you asked. “One whom you can take care of?”

Cat replied with a single, emotionless laugh.

“Let’s just say I’m in-between relationships,” she replied. “Although...”

But then she cut herself off and chuckled out a soft never mind.

“No, what?” you pressed, hoping you weren’t being too rude. “Although...?”

Cat suddenly stopped walking, and you almost ran into her. But before you could apologize, she grasped your wrist and scurried down to the laundry room. She quickly closed the door behind you, her brow furrowed with guilt.

“What?” you asked breathlessly. “What’s going on?”

“It’s... the guy with the broken leg,” she whispered. “I know I shouldn’t be falling for patients, but he’s just really handsome, and he reminds me of a little kitten, and the way he smiles at me gets my heart all in a knot.”

You stared at her for a few moments, absolutely speechless. Cat seemed like the strong, independent, unflappable type of girl who can expertly flirt with a guy and he won’t even know she’s flirting with him. And here she was, wringing her hands nervously and talking about kittens and knotted hearts.

“I --”

“I think he likes me, too,” she continued. “I just -- I don’t know what to do.”

You blinked before you finally found words. “I mean -- I think you should tell him. You said it was the guy with the broken leg?”

Cat nodded.

“Brian’s friend?”

She nodded again.

A smile pulled at your lips, and you took Cat’s hands, holding them reassuringly. “He told me yesterday -- Brian told me that his friend likes you. His exact words were ‘he’s carryin’ a real big torch.’ That you’ve got gumption, and that’s exactly what he likes in a woman. You need to tell him how you feel!”

Cat’s brow furrowed even more, and a hesitant frown curved her red lips. “I don’t know...”

“He just broke his leg, right?” you urged. “He won’t be staying here long. If you really don’t want to confess to him now, just give him hints.”

“But I have!” she replied. “I’ve smiled and let my touches linger and given him chocolate pudding with every meal!”

“Okay... Then... Maybe just tell him you want to go out once he’s no longer a patient?”

Cat pursed her lips at you, releasing her hands from your hold and crossing her arms over her chest. “That’s the same as confessing.”

You were about to make another suggestion, but Cat’s gasp cut you off.

“I know!” she exclaimed, her eyes lighting up. “You -- you can bring him his lunch and talk about me and make it obvious that I’m interested. And then once he’s discharged, he can ask me out.”

You had jumped back a little when she’d said ‘you’ -- her voice had been very insistent, and she’d pointed right at you.

But... it really wasn’t a bad idea.

“I can do that,” you nodded. “Bringing a patient’s meal is definitely something I’ve done as a volunteer. Many times.”

Cat broke out into a smile, and before you knew it, she’d stepped up to you and enveloped you in a hug. “Oh, thank you,” she squealed softly. “This means we’re friends now, and I promise I will return the favor.”

“No sweat,” you chuckled, lifting your arms and squeezing her back. “What’s a favor between friends?”

“All right,” Cat said, pulling back and grinning at you. “Let’s get this laundry done. We should be done just before lunchtime.”

“I’ll make sure we are,” you replied, taking a page from Cat’s book and shooting her a sly wink.

“Lunchtime,” you announced as you approached the hospital bed, carrying a tray of food and hoping your nerves weren’t too obvious.

The patient, whose name you had learned was Wonpil, pushed himself into a seated position, and you couldn’t help but notice he had a very disappointed frown on his lips.

“Where’s Cat?” he asked as you carefully set the tray down on his lap.

“She’s... she’s a little busy right now,” you explained, not meeting his eye so he wouldn’t know you were lying. “I’m a volunteer, so I offered to deliver lunch today.”

Wonpil’s frown immediately disappeared, his brows lifting in surprise. “Oh -- you’re -- Brian’s --”

You felt your cheeks begin to warm, and you continued to avoid Wonpil’s gaze. “Y--yes,” you chuckled. “I guess he told you when he came to visit you yesterday?”

Wonpil nodded quickly, his lips now curved into the sweetest smile. Now you knew why Cat had called him a kitten; he was probably the most adorable guy you’d ever seen.

“I’m Wonpil,” he greeted, holding his hand out toward you.

You took it delicately, shaking it and introducing yourself in turn.

“Thank you for my lunch,” Wonpil grinned. “Even though Cat didn’t bring it, I’m glad I got to meet you.”

“Me too,” you replied with a shy smile. And then you inhaled deeply because this was your chance. You sat on the edge of his bed, smoothing your dress over your lap. “Speaking of Cat, though... Brian told me you... have a thing for her?”

Wonpil had been looking at the food on his tray, but upon hearing your question, his gaze snapped up to meet yours. His lips were now curved down, his forehead wrinkled.

“He told you that?”

“Well... yeah,” you said, laughing softly. “But it’s kind of obvious. You’ve mentioned her twice already.”

“...Oh, yeah.” Wonpil chuckled guiltily and shrugged.

“I hope I’m not overstepping, but... I think you should go for it,” you told him, hoping you sounded as casual as you were trying to. “I think you’re going to be discharged any day now, and in my humble opinion, the first thing you should do once you are is... ask her out.”

“I... should?” he asked cautiously.

You nodded, shooting him an encouraging grin. “She told me she likes --”

You were about to tell him what she’d really told you: she likes guys she can take care of. But the only thing you really knew about Wonpil right now was that he was in the hospital. He didn’t know Cat had told you about him, so you probably shouldn’t mention any of that.

“She told me she likes guys with really adorable smiles,” you finished. “And I think you have a pretty adorable smile.”

That adorable smile of his instantly appeared, his eyes lighting up with hope. “Really? You think I’d really have a chance if I asked her out?”

“I really think so,” you assured him.

“Well, well, well, what do we have here?”

You jumped a little at the sudden interruption, standing up and turning to see Brian -- a smirking Brian -- walking toward Wonpil’s bed. Your heart immediately skipped about five beats, and you pressed your lips together to stop an incredibly giddy smile from forming on your lips.

“Y/N brought me my lunch,” Wonpil answered. “And she told me to ask out the nurse I’ve been falling for.”

Brian’s eyebrows rose, and he shot you a questioning glance. “Oh, did she?”

Wonpil nodded vigorously. “I think I’m going to once I’m discharged.”

Brian held out one hand then, flashing a piece of paper he was holding. “Speaking of, the receptionist gave me these.”

“What are those?” Wonpil inquired curiously.

“Your discharge papers! You can leave once you finish your lunch,” Brian grinned.

Wonpil’s eyes widened, and he froze for a moment... but then he quickly picked up the sandwich on his tray and stuffed it into his mouth.

Brian chuckled, shaking his head a little before taking a step closer to you.

Your heart began to beat double-time, and the corners of your lips tugged up into a soft smile.

“Hey,” he greeted quietly.

“Hi,” you replied. “How are you?”

“I’m great, though I’m doing even better now.”

Your heart jumped a little, and you let out an almost silent giggle.

Brian’s expression then turned a bit more serious, and he knit his eyebrows together before he asked, “Hey, while he’s stuffin’ his face over there... can I talk to you?”

His urgent tone was pretty obvious, and it made your stomach drop down to your feet. He had just told you he was doing even better now that he was in your presence, so it couldn’t be anything bad... right? But why did he sound so grave?

You simply nodded, and Brian reached out to gently grasp your elbow. He led you to the next bed over, tugging at the curtain so you could have a bit of privacy.

“Listen,” he started, making your stomach even more fluttery. “There’re rumors goin’ around that... we’ll be shipping out sometime soon. I don’t know if it’s true, and if it is, I don’t know when... I just... “

His gaze pierced into yours, and you didn’t even realize you were holding your breath -- but you most definitely were.

“I want to spend as much time as I can with you before that happens.”

You let out that breath, exhaling with relief. Although, you weren’t really relieved that he was probably going to be leaving soon... but you weren’t going to think too much about that right now.

“Okay,” you whispered, tipping your head into a tiny nod. “Yes. Me too.”

Brian broke out into a smile, and he leaned in to press his lips to your cheek. He lingered there, the tip of his nose brushing against your skin. You felt his eyelashes flutter against your cheekbone, and it sent a delicious chill down your spine.

“I gotta help Wonpil get back to base, and then I have some work to do... but how about dinner again tonight?”

You nodded again, but then a thought popped into your head. “I -- I’m sure my dad won’t mind.”

Hopefully, he wouldn’t mind.

Brian froze for just a moment, a flash of panic darting through his gaze. “...Oh. I... didn’t really think about that.”

Another thought popped into your head. It might have been a crazy one, but you voiced it, anyway.

“Why don’t you come over to my house instead?” you asked, your eyebrows lifting with expectation and curiosity.

Brian froze yet again.

“...Go... to your house? And... have dinner. With you. And your father. The... new general?”

He gulped anxiously.

Part 5

[squarecarousel]

Interview with Caitlin Alexander

Well folks, we're nearly at the end of our Square Carousel journey, and there are just two interviews left – both with two of our longest-standing members! Today, we reconnect with Caitlin Alexander, who has been with the Square Carousel Collective from its very beginning almost 10 years ago. Although we've featured an interview with her here in the past, it's been so long that we are due for an update! When she's not freelancing or performing her duties as an SC admin extraordinaire, Caitlin works tirelessly on her craft, creating prints, products, hand lettered posters, and artwork that embrace the earthy beauty of nature. With a strong focus on environmentalism and a sense of community, her artwork exudes a warmth and complexity that draws the viewer in and invites them to stay a while. Read on for her gems of wisdom!

Make Earth Cool Again

Q: Comparing your early work from your first few years after college to your most recent pieces, you've kept a lot of the textural, playful essence of your style while refining certain elements. Has your process changed much since those early days, and if so, what do you now do differently? 

 A: Such a great question straight out of the gate! My process has changed quite a bit since I graduated in 2011 (almost a decade ago... yikes!). In college, part of my crafted identity as a brand-new illustrator was my traditional use of gouache paint. I actually, in all honestly, was kind of a snob about it, because so many people in our department worked solely digitally. I felt that digital painting was a crutch, which I suppose can be true in some cases, and possibly even more-so when you're applying that to college students, but I certainly had no ground to stand on. In reality, my snobbery kept me from learning critical tools, as I never took Photoshop or Illustrator classes, aside from the one that was required for graduation. This hindered my work a great deal outside of college, given that illustration is so often paired with graphic design, and editing work for clients was so much more difficult traditionally. In 2013, I got a job designing t-shirts, and lied to the company, saying I knew how to use Illustrator. Luckily it was remote, so I was able to teach myself without anyone hovering over me, but that was so foolish, looking back, given the expensive education I got at SCAD should have been my opportunity to learn those things. I introduced digital work more and more over the years, and by 2016 or so, I was primarily a digital artist. Gouache will always have a place in my heart, and I will still break out the tubes occasionally, but working digitally has allowed me to grow so much more as an illustrator, with the ability to edit, paint with more detail, and having more control over color and layering. 

Q: Of all the projects you've done in your professional career, which would you say is closest to your heart? 

 A: Probably the picture book I worked on a couple of years ago, titled "Cool For You." I had a lot of creative freedom for that project, and the subject matter of climate change is personally very important to me. Working with the author, Marianna, was really wonderful, as well. 

Cool For You book cover

Q: The Southwest influence on your work is pretty significant, and I think it's safe to assume you appreciate the majesty of the landscape in your region of the country. However, if you had to live in another state, which would you choose and why? 

 A: Funny you ask that, because I've actually considered moving from Texas to Colorado lately! The culture there is still very western, but I appreciate the liberal point of view (Texas has been grating on me lately, even living in Austin), and the landscape is even more stunning out there! I'd be close to so many inspiring National Parks. Plus, summers wouldn't be 8 months of the year and over 100 degrees for half of it! 

Travel West postcard (1 of 6)

Q: TV shows or movies? 

 A: Lately, Jordan and I have been watching New Girl on repeat. I'm not usually one to watch a show or movie over and over again, but I think we really just needed something light and fun, since life has been so very stressful over the last year.

Q: What's your favorite subject to draw? 

 A: This one is hard! I'm torn between people and landscapes. People are more fun and comfortable for me, and I could knock out a bunch of them quickly. Landscapes are always intimidating, and I'm nervous the whole time, feeling like I can't remember how I did it the time before. It's so strange, because it always ends up fine! But since I feel that way, the payoff is so much greater when I feel satisfied with the final result. 

Q: What would a perfect day look like for you? A: I probably would have answered this totally differently pre-COVID, but in this current world we live in, I would absolutely love to have what used to be a normal, uneventful weekend day for me: Jordan and I would sleep in a little, see an early afternoon movie at the Alamo Drafthouse where we'd eat lunch, then spend the rest of the afternoon browsing used book stores and estate sales, and then meet our friends at the neighborhood coffeehouse for dinner and Trivia Night. I will be so happy to have that again. 

Cover art for East Side Magazine

Book Lover Ladies series- The Book Clubbers

Q: What have you learned from your years at Square Carousel, whether organizing behind the scenes or as a contributor? 

 A: Oooof!! So SO many things! Wow... well, I'll go with the most obvious first: as a member, I learned how to continue to make portfolio-worthy work, even without jobs coming in. That was definitely the most valuable thing about Square Carousel, in my opinion, and hopefully what everyone else got out of it, as well. It can be so hard for fresh graduates to keep up that momentum, and the group saved many of us from becoming stagnant. In terms of running the group... it's been rewarding, but honestly very difficult throughout the years. There have been many ups and downs, and finding the right balance between structure and patience can be extremely challenging. I'm super proud of Elizabeth and myself (OG members!) for keeping it running through the messes-- we've been through some shit together! My major takeaway is the importance of diligence. Projects, businesses, organizations-- they all need at least a couple of people who just keep chugging along, always maintaining the structure (schedule and accountability) and balance (rules and lighthearted encouragement). 

Moth magnets

Q: As the readers are aware, Square Carousel drawing to a close soon. Do you have any plans for what you'll do with the extra time you'll have after our tri-weekly challenges end? 

 A: You know, I actually haven't thought about this too much yet. It's probably because I'll just fill it with more self-imposed projects and deadlines, since I was able to bring that skill I learned in Square Carousel into the rest of my career a while ago. (Or more real jobs! That would be ideal!) I'll miss the community though, and hope to find a way to keep that aspect of freelance life alive. Instagram friends, anyone? 

Q: What's your quirkiest habit? 

 A: Jordan told me recently that he found it weird and endearing that I joke-sing to my cats in the kitchen about really stupid stuff... so probably that! Official Cat Lady© status achieved.

Caitlin and Buster Keaton the Kitten

Q: What advice would you give to a newbie illustrator just starting out today? 

 A: I'd give them the hard advice that our professors didn't really give us in school: there is no way this is going to work out for you if you're not incredibly committed to pursuing it. Now, don't get me wrong-- I'm not telling anyone to have an unhealthy work/life balance because I think that's a toxic sentiment. But you have to keep illustrating and illustrating and illustrating, and arguably more importantly, keep networking and networking and networking. You're going to be rejected or ghosted more often than not, but if you really want it to work out, you're going to keep doing it anyway. And taking critiques if industry folks offer them, to grow and become better. Don't become stagnant in those critical building years.

Caitlin’s studio

Q: Anything else you would like the readers to know? 

A: Yes – thank you so much for supporting Square Carousel through our amazing ten years of challenges! We really appreciate everyone who has kept up with us, checking out the illustrations for each prompt and reading our posts and interviews. Y'all are wonderful, and we hope you'll continue to find us, wherever each of us fly from here! And on that sweet note, we say goodbye for now! Check out Caitlin’s website for more, and follow her on Instagram for new art when it drops.

Join us next time for our final interview!

[marvels-writings]

As Long As You Need (5)

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Part 4

Request:  hi! Would you be willing to write a Carol x R imagine? Carol and R are close friends even though R is somewhat closed off. Carol really wants to date R and is curious why R doesn't date. She comes to R's house which she hasn't ever been to in order to talk to R for whatever reason and finds out that R has a young child.

A/N: So I was gonna finish off Phoenix and the Stars today too but I literally can’t, like i don’t have the emotional stability to finish two of my favorite series in one day, I’m finishing it later. 

Most people say relationships are stressful as hell, raising a kid is even worse. Somehow, Carol made both of them the easiest thing. You’d been together for about 8 months now, Brooke loved her and almost considered her as another aunt at this point, it melted your heart to see them get along this well. 

Carol loved you, she was almost scared to tell you, terrified you won’t feel the same, but she was coming over today to watch a few movies with Brooke until her grandparents picked her up, but your TV glitched out and refused to work, you suggested going out but Carol refused. 

So here you were now, playing UNO with the people you loved the most, Carol +4ed Brooke and she hated it, and instantly threw the nearest pillow at Carol, Carol feigned hurt and threw a pillow back, which accidentally hit you. Brooke backed up against Carol, scared. 

“How dare you?” You joked, picking up the pillow and hitting both of them at once, they grinned and started hitting you with pillows, teaming up on you while doing so. 

“However, will I live?!” You exclaimed, laughing before Brooke shoved a pillow in your face, the pillow didn’t taste that great. 

Carol and Brooke’s laughter warmed your heart, even if they were practically burying you with pillows, a knock finally made them stop, Brooke ran to the door instantly and opened it to find her grandparents on the other side. 

“This place is a mess.” M/n remarked, picking Brooke up and stepping over the spilled UNO cards and pillows while you smiled politely at her, getting off the couch, Carol following you sheepishly. 

“We were playing UNO.” You confessed, shrugging and going to Brooke’s room to get her things, a small smile on your face while you heard Carol talking to your parents and Brooke. 

“So are you two serious?” F/n asked, Carol’s eyes widened, the two of you had talked about it, Carol planned to stay with you as long as she could but didn’t know how long you wanted her to stay. 

“I think so, right babe?” Carol asked, turning to see you with a lovesick smile on your face while you carried Brooke’s bag to her. 

“You need to marry her already,” M/n said, taking the bag from you as you and Carol’s faces turned into tomatoes from blushing. 

“Great to see you mom.” You said awkwardly, your dad shrugged but before he could make another comment you practically pushed them out the door, leaning against it in exhaustion. 

“Sorry about that, they can be pushy sometimes.” You apologized, walking over and cleaning up the mess of UNO cards and pillows. 

“You still didn’t answer my question.” Carol muttered, moving to help you pick up the cards and making a small pile of cards in her hand. 

“You were right,” You said uncertainly and threw a pillow at the couch, it landed perfectly. “I think we are serious about this.”

The two of you cleaned up in a comfortable, yet still tense silence. You could see the tension in Carol’s body but you also didn’t know where this was heading. Carol had talked about moving in and maybe even marriage in the abstract, moving in seemed closer than ever but you had a lot in your house already, maybe Carol could help you out with that.

“I ordered pizza a while back so that should be coming soon” Carol said, plopping down on the couch after cleaning everything up. You put the cards on the dining table and joined her

“With-”

“With the smokey pepperoni and the olives and the thick crust.” Carol cut you off, smirking at you before putting something on the TV, satisfied with how well she knew you. 

You watched Sherlock for some time, snuggled into Carol’s shoulder with her warm arm draped across the back of the couch until the pizza arrived. Carol got up and paid for it without you even having to get up, you smiled and got up, the smell of your favorite pizza filling your senses. 

“Oh my god I love you.” You said, opening the pizza box as Carol took out the plates and a few cans of beer to drink, a large thud of the beer can hitting the floor brought you back to what you’d just said. 

“Do, you do mean, you mean that?” Carol stuttered, picking up the dropped can and putting it next to your hand to find you perfectly calm. 

“Of course I do.” You answered easily, opening both of the cans for her and handing one to her, a small smile on your face, she didn’t need to say it back. 

Carol knew you loved her without you having to say it, she saw it in the way you cared for her even though you had too much on your mind, she saw it in how you waited up late for her when she came back from stressful missions, she saw it in the way you put her first, before yourself and before your niece. 

“I love you too.” Carol said softly, meaning it, you smiled, knowing she didn’t have to say it. 

You saw how she loved you in the way she came back faster from missions to come back to you, you saw it in the way she flustered around you and the way she put most effort into getting along with the people you cared most about, you saw it in the way she helped you even though there were millions out there who needed her help. 

“Well we’re sappy.” You joked, heading over to the couch with your pizza and a can of your favorite beer, lounging against the cushions while you waited for Carol to join you, and she did as soon as she could. 

Throughout dinner, you saw her constantly trying to avoid her phone, when you asked her about it she put it away instantly, but you saw a flash of a text from Fury, he needed her on a mission but she was avoiding it. 

For you.

“Fury needs you.” You sighed, getting up and putting the dishes in the dishwasher and throwing the beer cans away. Carol’s eyes filled with guilt, she didn’t want to leave you. 

“It’s a week-long mission, he wants me to leave in two days.” She sighed, pausing the show and walking over to you, guilt filling her features as she flicked hair out of her face. 

“If he needs you, you should go.” You said, turning around to face her, trying to pretend her leaving had no consequence for you. 

“But I need you.” Carol confessed, looking down at her hands, you smiled softly and walked over to her, taking her face in your hands, heart breaking when you saw tears building up in her hazel eyes. 

“It’s okay,” You comforted, stroking her cheeks as tears fell, “Just come home to me Stargirl.”

Tears fell faster as she broke at the nickname, you said it so softly and she needed you, badly. You made her feel normal and loved, more than anyone could ever give her. You gave her everything you had and you were always ready to give her more, you loved her so much and she couldn’t give you the same. 

“What did I do wrong?” You asked, panicked when you saw Carol break even further, you wanted to help her as much as you could, this was the last thing you wanted. 

“Nothing,” Carol muttered, reaching one hand up to hold your hand to her face when she felt you start to pull away. 

“It’s just, you give me so much more than I can give you, you deserve more than me.” Carol confessed, her heart breaking more at the thought of you not being in her life anymore. 

“C’mere.” You said softly, using the same tone of voice you did whenever you were comforting Brooke, Carol recognized it instantly. 

You let go of her face and opened up your arms, Carol hesitated but hugged you almost instantly, you squirmed slightly in her tight grip but hugged her back, your shirt getting wet from the tears on your shirt. 

“I love you okay? And you’re more than I deserve, you’re everything I want and so much more.” You said softly. 

Carol couldn’t stop herself from hugging you tighter, she needed you more than anything, it broke her heart to leave. You gasped slightly, her grip becoming a bit too tight, you didn’t say anything, instead tapping her shoulder slightly to loosen up. 

She almost pulled away in shock that she had hurt you, but you pulled her back, hand coming up to cradle her head softly, hands running through her scalp to calm her. You stood like this for a few minutes until Carol had calmed down, she pulled away, her eyes red. 

“Feeling better?” You asked, hands falling to hold hers, you stroked her knuckles softly and felt the callouses on her hands you’d felt a thousand times before. 

“Definitely,” She sniffled, “Wanna continue watching Sherlock?” Carol asked, changing the topic. 

You smiled and nodded, letting her pull you to the TV and switch it on, but you stopped her from playing it, needing to ask her something. Carol looked at you, brow furrowed and nose crinkled in confusion. 

“How do you feel about moving in with me?” You asked, hand on top of hers as she held the remote, you looked right into her eyes, waiting for any sort of reaction. Thankfully, you got an amazing reaction.

“I’d love that.” Carol answered, grinning before leaning in to kiss you, remote long forgotten as she let herself get lost in the feeling of kissing you. 

She wanted this kind of feeling for the rest of her life, the feeling of being happy, loved, the feeling of being with you. Carol couldn’t wait to spend her life coming home to you, in a sense, she already was .

A/N: We all needed this in our lives, right? I'm not crying you’re crying

| Part 6 |

Tag List: @capcarolsdanver​, @versdan​, @lesbian-girls-wayhaught​, @lovebotlarson​, @dhengkt​, @5aftermidnight​, @hstoria​, @natasha-danvers​, @veryfunnyal​, @xxxtwilightaxelxxx​ , @ophelias-heart​  , @never-didbefore​ , let me know if you’d like to be in any of my tag lists!

[dipulb3]

Analysis: Female directors are having a moment

New Post has been published on https://appradab.com/analysis-female-directors-are-having-a-moment/

Analysis: Female directors are having a moment

In the year of our Lord 2021, it feels like female directors are finally getting more opportunities — and more acknowledgment.

Take, for example, this past Sunday’s Golden Globe Awards.

Three women were nominated in the best director category for the first time.

Only one woman had ever won the category prior to Sunday, and that was Barbra Streisand in 1984 for “Yentl.”

Here are some of the women who are making waves and headlines in Hollywood:

Chloé Zhao: The “Nomadland” director became the first woman of Asian descent and only the second woman ever to win the best director award at this year’s Golden Globes.

The film’s star, Frances McDormand, told The New York Times Zhao really understood the actress’ affinity for the character who packs up her life in a van and becomes part of an older community of people who work odd jobs across the country.

“Chloé tapped into the truth of it which was at different points of my life, I’ve said to my husband, ‘I can’t take this anymore, I’m dropping out,'” McDormand said.

Regina King: The acclaimed actress-turned-director was up against Zhao at the Globes.

She has been on quite a streak in her career the past few years, including nabbing the best supporting actress Oscar for “If Beale Street Could Talk” in 2019.

Now, the former child star is being hailed for her big screen directorial debut in “One Night in Miami,” adapted from Kemp Powers’ stage play about a meeting between Cassius Clay, Jim Brown, Sam Cooke and Malcolm X.

The night of the Golden Globes, King told “E!” it was “bittersweet” that she, Zhao and Emerald Fennell marked the first trio of female nominees, given that this is 2021.

Emerald Fennell: Another actress who has stepped behind the camera (we are starting to see a trend here), she has received critical acclaim for writing, directing and producing the thriller “Promising Young Woman,” starring Carey Mulligan.

The movie is not only cheeky but gets into some uncomfortable territory, so much so that it has been praised for turning the revenge genre on its ear.

“It’s just part of the fun of making something, the smoke and mirrors and the misdirections,” Fennell told IndieWire. “I love all that stuff, all of my favorite movies have that sort of thing in them. It’s very interesting, isn’t it, how much we want violence, how much instinctively as an audience we’re begging for blood.”

Robin Wright: “The House of Cards” star did some directing on that Netflix series, so she wasn’t a total neophyte when it came to both starring in and directing her first feature film, “Land.”

Wright plays a woman struck by a family tragedy who gives up her successful life in the big city and moves to a remote area in Wyoming.

She told Women’s Wear Daily that she was delighted with the film’s reception so far.

“We feel so blessed that people are feeling the movie,” Wright said. “It is very relevant to what’s going on today, of being disconnected from our loved ones. We’re not living the norm. The message in this movie is about that very thing.”

These leading female directors represent just a handful of creatives proving women are making inroads on the Hollywood scene.

The numbers don’t lie: For the second consecutive year, the percentages of women directing top-grossing films increased, reaching “recent historic highs,” while the overall percentages of women working in key behind-the-scenes roles remained relatively stable, according to a study by San Diego State University released in January.

“Women accounted for 16% of directors working on the top 100 grossing films in 2020, up from 12% in 2019 and 4% in 2018,” wrote study author Martha M. Lauzen, founder and executive director of SDSU’s Center for the Study of Women in Television and Film. “Women comprised 18% of directors on the top 250 films in 2020, up from 13% in 2019 and 8% in 2018.”

A rising tide raises all ships, especially when a woman is at the helm, so here’s to more female directors on the horizon.

For your weekend

Three things to watch:

‘Coming 2 America’

Prince Akeem and Semmi are heading back to Queens, New York. Eddie Murphy and Arsenio Hall reprise their respective roles for the sequel to the hit 1988 film.

This time the prince is in search of his son and heir to the kingdom of Zamunda. My question is what have the rose petal droppers been up to all this time?

“Coming 2 America” starts streaming Friday on Amazon Prime.

‘Boss Level’

Former special forces agent Roy Pulver (Frank Grillo) is trapped in a time loop that constantly repeats the day of his murder. To break the cycle, he must hunt down Col. Clive Ventor (Mel Gibson) while also trying to save his ex-wife (Naomi Watts).

That sounds like some seriously fast-paced action.

“Boss Level” starts streaming Friday on Hulu.

‘Biggie: I Got a Story to Tell’

March 9 marks the 24th anniversary of the unsolved murder of rapper Christopher Wallace, aka Biggie Smalls or The Notorious B.I.G., at age 24.

Arguably one of the best and most beloved hip-hop artists of all time, Wallace is the subject of a new doc that looks at the legacy of his life and death. Currently streaming on Netflix, with “rare footage and in-depth interviews, this documentary celebrates the life of The Notorious B.I.G. on his journey from hustler to rap king.”

So, call your friends and let them know so your crew run-run-run, your crew run-run to catch it.

Two things to listen to:

Sweden has blessed us with the likes of ABBA and Spotify. Now add Zara Larsson to that list.

The 23-year-old singer, who got her start as a youngster on a TV talent show, is dropping her third studio album, “Poster Girl,” on Friday.

March is the month we celebrate women — and who is more empowering than Oprah Winfrey?

The answer to that is no one.

Check out “Oprah’s SuperSoul Conversation‪s” podcast if you want to feel motivated, inspired or just need the uplifting vibe that is trademark Oprah. ‬

One thing to talk about:

Are we over awards shows?

My Appradab colleague Brian Lowry reported that “Globes ratings plummeted more than 60% from the 18.3 million viewers who watched last year, per Nielsen data, to an average audience of 6.9 million.”

Yikes.

With the pandemic going on you would think plenty of people would be tuning in to shows like the Golden Globes, but, apparently, not. Even in a “normal year,” there seems to be less enthusiasm for award shows than there used to be, and that begs the question if Hollywood needs to find a different way to celebrate the industry.

The pandemic is causing us all to reevaluate things.

Something to sip on

Looking for a new show to watch? We asked some of our friends around Appradab what TV binge has helped them decompress in the time of Covid.

Phil Mattingly, senior White House correspondent

I basically have an encyclopedic knowledge of Bravo shows due to my wife’s fandom/the disappearance of sports the first few month of Covid. Not sure I should acknowledge that publicly.

Alisyn Camerota, Appradab New Day anchor

I’ve been watching “Succession.” It depicts a dysfunctional, rotten world, and somehow I find that soothingly distracting from our daily stress.

Stephanie Elam, Appradab correspondent

Fantasy, take me away! I’ve turned to shows that allow me to escape reality — “Once Upon a Time” with my daughter, “Lovecraft Country” and “His Dark Materials” without her.

Ana Cabrera, Appradab Newsroom anchor

“Criminal Minds” on Netflix. I know it’s old, but I’m a newcomer to it! I’m a sucker for mystery and suspense.

Pop back here next Thursday for all the latest entertainment happenings that matter.