#i will never be satisfied with a backrooms game but i will always play or watch them

[ashtreelane]

i'm always really endeared by bad backrooms games but in a bad way . like i think all the time about that backrooms game w the moth levels & it makes me giggle . the latest update put in a level where you run through a corn field and you have to jitter along fences to find the opening in them . it sucks and no one likes it

[my-violent-valentine]

I am stuck in a hole I call home, a hole I’ve created for myself.

Maybe I shouldn’t have gone to my childhood home. I shouldn’t have seen how the newly blossomed flowers and trees breathe through the golden curtains in my room that were once purple. Or have laid on the black velvet couch in the backroom watching a TV show that I hated but has always felt familiar, or walked through the garden barefoot with the sun baking the black concrete, or drink for the first time with my sister. It makes me want to go back and be wrapped in that familiarity, to be able to relive the beauty and loneliness of childhood summers, tangled in green water hoses with broken nozzles, uncut grass soft under my toes, and the park that’s a fifteen minute walk.

I used to spend so many summers praying for a way out, as if I could write myself into a new universe or play a game long enough that I’d be one of the characters. No matter how futile my prayers, there was still comfort, there was still my family. Here, I have myself and fragments of memories I will spend the rest of my life trying to relive, but will never be satisfied with. I have few fleeting moments that I will also take for granted. 

May 17, 2023

[mayans-sauce]

Shy, Dorky & Strong

Gif Credit: @pedropcl

Pairing: Angel Reyes x Female Reader

Word Count: 1.4K

Warnings: NSFW, 18+ ONLY, unprotected sex, mention of bodily fluids.

Request by anon which you can find HERE

Request by @madgirl-spacegirl-stargirl which you can find HERE

Request by @admirehermind which you can find HERE

A/N: found a way to combine all of these so I hope that’s ok and that it turned out good. Hope you all enjoy <3 !No spoilers for season 3 in this writing!

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•• Main Masterlist •• Angel Masterlist ••

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You were a shy individual. You always had been. Growing up, you mostly kept to yourself in your nerdy fantasy world. It was what brought you joy and security. People were mean, and you didn’t associate yourself with so many people. You only had a few good friends, and that was enough for you. A boyfriend had never been in your life. It wasn’t something you sought after, and you also didn’t think boys liked you in that way.

How your relationship with someone the complete opposite of you started was in pure luck. One of your friends had begged you to pick her up at some party because she was too drunk to drive. She didn’t answer her phone when you had arrived, so you had no other choice than to walk inside.

You were dreading it because she was at some clubhouse that belonged to an MC. An MC wasn’t something you associate yourself with, so you were scared to go inside. But your friend wasn’t answering her phone, and you weren’t one of those people to flop out on someone.

Gathering the little courage you had left, you entered the noisy and crowded room. It didn’t seem like anyone noticed you, which was nice. You scanned the room but found no sign of her.

You walked over to what seemed to be the bar. A man decorated with a few tattoos on his arms sat alone nursing a beer.

“U-um… excuse me… uh I’m looking for my friend Alex. She said she would be her.”

The man had a bemused look on his face as he looked you up and down. “Yea… she went to the backroom with a friend of mine. She will be out soon.”

“O-oh… ok… thank you.” You were about to walk out to wait in the car for her, but the man introduced himself.

“I’m Angel,” he offered you his hand to shake.

“Y/N,” you took it with caution but smiled at him regardless.

“Nice to meet you. You can wait here with me if you want.”

“Uh, yeah, sure.” You sat at the barstool next to Angel. He seemed like an ok man, but you still kept your guard up.

“Yo prospect! A beer for the beautiful lady.”

Beautiful? You never saw yourself as a beauty but just more like a little less than the average girl. Your skin was heating up at him calling you that.

A chubby-looking man served it to you in an instant, he was a little clumsy, but it made you calm down in a way.

“So…”

You grew to like this Angel dude. He seemed like a nice man. He made you feel comfortable right away. He asked you questions about yourself, your interest, and whatnot, and you loved how easy it was to open up to him.

He didn’t seem to mind when you share a bit of your dorky side with him. He loved it. He wanted to know more, so when the time came when your friend Alex emerged from wherever she had been, and it was time to go, he asked if you would be down to go eating lunch with him tomorrow.

You usually didn’t do stuff like this. You had a bad experience with men and didn’t trust them that much, but it was just something about him that made you say yes.

And it was the best decision you had ever made.

The lunch with Angel had gone so well and smoothly, and it only got better from there.

He was the best thing that ever happened to you. You felt so loved and protected with him.

He would indulge in your interests. Watching the newest Marvel movies with you or playing a new game you had been excited about for a long time. Your favorite pastime together would be to binge-watch shows. You introduced him to new ones he didn’t even know existed. Angel loved when you talked nerdy to him. How excited and open you became when you talked about your passion.

He always complimented you on your wardrobe. You dressed differently than the women he usually hangs around with, but Angel loved it. He always told you how cute and innocent you looked and would brag about you to his boys on what a beautiful girlfriend he had.

“Look how cute and beautiful my girl is.”

You also knew how to kick it up a notch when needed. Dressing a little bit sexier and revealing when you wanted. It wasn’t for anyone else but Angel, and he couldn’t keep his eyes away from you when you did. His touches would be all over you in an attempt to go home a little early to have some fun in bed.

“Let’s go home before I take you right here right now in front of my brothers.”

Speaking of fun in bed, Angel was the first man to make you feel seen and comfortable in the bedroom. You hadn’t had that much sexual experience, but with what you had, it was all a horrible time. None of the guys you had been with ever care about your pleasure. So it came as a surprise to you when all Angel wanted to do was give you his.

He spent his time worshipping your body with kisses, licks, and bites, already making you come twice without even having to fuck you before he came to the most important part.

His length lined itself up with your desperate entrance, coating himself with your wetness from your dripping folds.

“Do you trust me?” His eyes looking soft into yours to look for any hesitation in them. He found none.

“With my life Angel.” Your hand tangled in his hair to bring his lips to yours for a brief second.

“I won’t hurt you. I promise.”

“I know you won’t. I’m just nervous.”

“Whenever you want to stop, tell me, and we’ll stop right away, ok?”

“Yes.”

He pushed himself into your warm and tight walls. He needed a minute to calm himself down as not to fuck you completely raw right away.

He kept his pace slow, to begin with, but gradually sped up at the request from you.

Your fingernails clawed at his back from the pleasure he brought you. You were in cloud nine, and you had never experienced something as intoxicating as the feeling of him fucking your tight and wet walls. His thumb coming down to give attention to your desperate clit, making you whimper out at the sensation, your eyes fluttering.

“Hey hey hey, look at me,” he grabbed your chin so that you could focus on him as his hips slammed into you repeatedly.

“Look at me as I make you come for the first time with my dick.”

“Y-yes… please, it fe-feels so good.”

It didn’t take long for the both of you to climb to the end. His expert body was making you both come undone in a matter of minutes.

“Let go for me.”

Your walls convulsed around him as he coated you with his warm seed.

A few tears ran down your cheeks at finally experiencing what sex is all about, feeling good and satisfied.

“Thank you, Angel.”

What came as the most surprise in the relationship was how good you could hold your own when needed. Angel thought that you were just a shy and innocent girl, but when you needed to be strong for yourself or others, you had no problem in doing so.

The first time it happened was when you and he were waiting together for a coffee, and the man in front of you started to get extremely rude to the barista, almost yelling and screaming at her for doing his order wrong. You didn’t hesitate to call him out for being a dickhead and told him that he better get the fuck out.

You weren’t sure if he scrambled away because of you or the big bad biker that you called your boyfriend, but either way, Angel was in shock when he saw what you had done, and it made him love and respect you so much more.

Yes, you were shy and dorky, but when it came time for you to be that strong, badass bitch you didn’t think about it for a second.

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Thank you for reading❤️ a quick reblog and feedback would be so appreciated❤️

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[ashesandhalefire]

progress report: i am missing you to death

alex, michael, and a lot of unsaid things.

-

inspired by an entirely out of context teaser shot of alex and a desperate need for interaction that has yet to be satisfied by season 3 canon.

-

Deep Sky provides the coordinates and the time, so Alex shows up and waits.

While he stands in the cool night air, he scans the flat terrain that stretches out to one side and the gully where the highway sits. Other than the whizzing traffic, oblivious to his insignificance, everything is quiet.

After about twenty minutes of the vibrating stillness, Michael slinks out of the shadows with his hat tucked low over his face and leans against the back of the car beside Alex’s SUV.

Blood rushing in his ears, Alex does a second quick sweep of the lot’s perimeter. Nothing obvious has changed in the shadows since he crept through the bushes to check potential sight lines, but Alex isn’t stupid. He was in over his head when Project Shepherd turned out to be just his father’s backroom hobby. Deep Sky outclasses his expertise in a way he isn’t ready to reckon with. They could be anywhere—somewhere in the lot, somewhere down the road, somewhere miles away—and Michael has sauntered directly into their crosshairs.

He left about five feet between them when he stopped to hook one ankle over the other and stare out at the traffic, and the distance is enough for deniability. Alex tightens his hands into anxious fists and forces a long, deep breath through his nose.

“Hey,” Michael says with a casual nod of his head. They stand listening to the roar of tires chewing their ways along the desert highway, and Alex waits for a sign. He checks Michael’s chest for the red point of a laser sight just in case. Nothing happens. They stand a little longer, and then Michael leans over and asks, “You got a light?”

“No. You got a cigarette?”

The corner of Michael’s mouth twitches. It stirs up a fondness that Alex has carefully and surgically distanced himself from for the last few months, and he glances around the parking lot again. Being in love with Michael is too easy. He falls into it without needing to think about it or to try, and the laziness of trusting things to fate is probably why they’ve never gotten it right. He should probably consider himself lucky. Sinking back into those feelings now, fruitlessly, after so much time has passed, will make him sloppy in a way he can’t afford.

“You shouldn’t be here. They could see you.”

Michael tucks his hands into his jacket pockets and shrugs, easy and unbothered. Or, almost unbothered. The muscles in his jaw are tight and tense. “You don’t even know what they do or if they’re looking for me. I haven’t exactly been hiding for the last year.”

“That doesn’t mean you should paint a bullseye on your chest.”

“But you should?”

Michael spits barbs like an old man working his way through seeded melon, careless and precise in equal measure. He always finds soft flesh.

“This isn’t a game,” Alex grits out, face growing hot with frustration. He watches a tractor trailer speed by on the road below and shoot a piece of trash out from beneath its tires.

“So tell me what it is, then,” Michael says, mouth turning down and voice suddenly going sharp as a knife’s edge, “because I didn’t really wait around to hear the rest of the story after Valenti said you were joining a cult.”

Alex looks over, and Michael’s brow is pinched to match the irritated wrinkle of his nose. Anger and tension leak off him like heat shimmers off the pavement at midday. He holds his casual posture, ankles crossed and hands tucked, but his eyes are furious.

“It’s complicated.”

Michael scoffs. “You know what, I shouldn’t bother. I should just drag your ass home, no questions.”

And now Alex’s temper flares: “Try it.”

“You think I wouldn’t? To save you?” He laughs meanly. “I’d have you over my shoulder so fucking fast—”

“I don’t need to be saved.”

“Obviously, you do.” Michael pushes off the car. The brim of his hat catches the light from the lamppost and casts half his face in shadows. “We have enough problems on our hands right now. We don’t need to poke the bear.”

“This bear poked first,” Alex says, equally furious. He checks behind Michael before hissing through his teeth, “They kidnapped Mimi. They drugged Jenna Cameron. Turnabout is fair play.”

“This isn’t turnabout! This isn’t even revenge. You’re joining their club. You are flinging yourself into a pit, Alex. A big, dark, deep pit, and when you get far enough in, none of us are going to be able to get you out. We’re gonna lose you. For good. And for no fucking reason.”

“Not for no reason,” Alex says. A tingle of shame trickles up the back of his neck. He knows he’s unprepared, going in without an exit strategy. But he can’t sit on his hands and do nothing. It makes him nervous and paranoid to be idle. “They know things.”

“Who gives a shit? Who gives one fucking iota of a shit about what they know?”

Alex frowns. “You have always wanted to know more—”

“Not like this! Not at the risk of—” Michael puts a fist to his forehead. Then he pulls off his hat and takes another step closer. His voice is softer when he speaks. “Why are you so hellbent on doing this, huh? This isn’t just your dad anymore. This is bigger than that.”

“I know.”

“They are gonna swallow you whole, and what’s the point if you’re just gone?”

Alex draws another long inhale through his nose. The weight of the thick, ugly ring on his finger feels like an anchor dragging him down. The memories of Caulfield crumbling to pieces in a cloud of fire are heavier. “If there’s even a chance that they know something, what choice do I have? I’m not getting caught off guard again. I owe you that much.”

“Bullshit,” Michael says with a jerk of his chin. “Doing it is one thing, but don’t pretend you’re doing it for me.” A pair of low-riding sports cars scream down the highway behind him, bobbing and weaving through the minimal traffic with their engines blaring. One falters behind a gas tanker and then chases its companion off towards the horizon with an roar. “If you had any interest in doing something for me, you would stay.”

Cold uncertainty creeps into Alex’s chest, and no number of layers can keep it out. He wants to ask: would I be welcome? Because he hasn’t felt like he would be in a long time. He had showed up, again and again. Sometimes, he had been wanted, and sometimes, he hadn’t been. The haze of open mic night had cleared for an instant, and the future had been visible, tangible, workable, and then, just as quickly, had vanished into the air. He had been left with Isobel’s obvious, humiliating pity, her mouth turned down as she stood to listen through the last note. That door had been closed. And yet, he wants to ask: would I be welcome? Dignity be damned.

“Are— are you asking me to stay?”

There must be something in his voice when he says it, no matter how hard he tries to control the pathetic wavering and the sunken surprise on his face, that means something to Michael. His whole body eases forward as if carried by an invisible current before he catches himself and says, “I’m done asking people for more than they’re willing to give me.”

“But you would ask? If you thought—?” Alex pushes. “You would want to ask?”

The corners of Michael’s mouth turn down and his gaze narrows almost imperceptibly, but Alex is watching for it. The more Michael closes off, the more Alex feels himself splitting open. Something bright and electric stirs in his chest.

“Because I thought you wouldn’t,” he says, waiting for the moment when Michael’s eyes widen, just slightly, just enough to understand. It comes, exactly as expected, and Michael sways closer.

“Yeah. Yeah, I’d ask. I’m not about to beg, but I’d ask.”

He’s gotten Michael to beg before, but never for something as serious as love. On his back or on his knees or in the bed of his truck, Alex has heard him plead and bargain for things he wants in the neediest, most desperate whispers, but that had been all carnal, base pleasure, and he had known Alex wouldn’t tell him no. Here, he’s talking about a different type of submission, the kind that humiliates someone like Michael, someone who has never been given enough. Michael won’t beg, and Alex needs to be asked, and a lot of time has been wasted between them thinking that one is the same as the other.

He can’t say he’ll stay. He’s too far in to back out. And, even if he could do it, staying doesn’t mean riding off into the sunset. It means more of the same: the secrets, the conspiracies, the mysteries, the agonies, the scraping open of old wounds in last-ditch efforts to heal them. But it also means Michael, so everything else is white noise.

Michael sees it all play out on his face. He sets his hat on the roof of Alex’s car and then turns to lean against the hatchback. He sighs, and Alex can tell that more weight than usual is resting on his shoulders. It’s not just Max dragging him under. His whole body sags with it, and the sharp focus that’s been in his eyes begins to recede as he drifts away towards the call of whatever nightmare is lurking at the back of his mind.

“It’ll be okay,” Alex says because he lacks for anything else to say, and Michael  stares at his boots with a sad smile. His throat bobs as he swallows down whatever it is that’s too hard to talk about with so little time left to say it, and then he turns to look at Alex.

“Your dad was a piece of shit,” he says, like this is some sort of revelation, “and you’re you.”

The words, said like an accusation, should probably turn his stomach, but they’re also said with a reverence that pushes Alex’s heart up into his throat. Whatever is happening has rocked Michael to his core far beyond how Alex knows to help.

“Less of a piece of shit, I hope.”

Michael stares at him, flexing his hand, and then says, with a nod, “Significantly, yeah.”

“I guess that’s the best I can hope for.” Alex laughs, and then he tips his head back to look at the starless sky. “I’ll take being afraid of being like him over being proud of being like him any day. At least it means I’m going in the right direction.”

Jesse haunts Alex differently than he haunts Michael. To Michael, Jesse is another human face that did something terrible to him, just more proof that looking for another planet to run to is a good idea. Jesse is a more specific phantom for Alex, much harder to let blur into the background of the general awfulness of life. There are reminders of his father all around town: placards, photographs, the sign for the street they lived on, a six-foot statue in town square. Those can be faced much more easily than the hints of his father that Alex finds in the mirror: the deep-set wrinkles in his brows, the cut of his mouth when he frowns, the tone of his voice when he yells, the shape of his thumb. To be a little less like him every day is an exhausting but necessary struggle.

Michael smiles, and Alex, mystified, thinks maybe he managed to help after all.

“Your plan wasn’t really to drag me home over your shoulder, was it?” he asks to distract from how Michael carefully swipes a finger at the corner of one eye.

Michael huffs, and the car jostles. “I don’t know. Maybe. I just wasn’t about to let you go without—” He licks his lips and says, “I wasn’t about to let you just go.”

Alex scuffs his shoe against the loose gravel. “Couldn’t get Kyle’s hubcaps off this time?”

Guilt settles over him after he says it. Guilt and something else, something like the relief of setting down a heavy burden that’s been carried too long.

“I thought you were making a mistake back then, too.” Michael takes the comment in stride, accepts it, and reaches out to touch the ring on Alex’s hand. He pinches it carefully, Alex’s fingers curled into the heat of his palm, and rolls his thumb until the ring twists to expose the thinner underside of the band. He strokes, skin then metal then skin, over and over. “Flinging yourself into some dark pit that you’d never come out of again.”

Alex wants to tell him that this is different. He can’t.

“Do me a favor, okay?”

Hand slipping up over Alex’s wrist and into the soft corner of his elbow, Michael crosses the final inches of space between them and pulls Alex close. In the dim light of the parking lot, they might be mistaken for the sort of strangers who meet in shadowy corners for quick exchanges of misery with rough words and rougher touch. But then Michael, trembling, touches the lapel of Alex’s jacket and presses a long kiss to his cheek.

He keeps his mouth there, breath hot and soft, and, before he gathers himself enough to continue, Alex says, “I’ll come back.”

Michael laughs, but it sounds like a gasp for air. “Not even gonna let me ask?”

Alex hums. “I’ll come back.”

“Yeah, you’ll come back,” Michael warns, “or I’ll come get you. And it won’t be fucking subtle.”

It sends a shiver down his spine to think of Michael storming a place as infinitely large as Deep Sky feels. If it comes to that, he’d be better off left behind. But as the thought comes, Michael’s grip shifts and the tentative press of their sides becomes a full-bodied hug that envelopes him like a warm breeze. His nose turns into the side of Michael’s neck: rain, crisp and fresh; gasoline, but faint; smoke, from his fire pit.

“I’m not really going anywhere. It’ll be fine.”

Michael squeezes, and Alex squeezes back. Everything else he wants to say is too big for this moment. And, selfishly, he wants to know that Michael will wait to hear it. He scolds himself for the thought, because they’ve each done their share of waiting miserably at the wayside, but then he lets it stand. Michael squeezes again, fingertips digging into separate points as he clings.

Alex cups a hand to the back of his head and touches his curls. He thinks about what it would mean to kiss Michael now, to kiss someone that he loves, who loves him, and imagines a tower of precariously stacked dominoes. Michael laughs wetly, and Alex lets go first, fingers lingering reluctantly.

[bvidzsoo]

Poison (Finale)

 Author: bvidzsoo

 Pairing: Kim Mingyu x female reader

 Warning: swearing, drinking, smut, violence, blood, death

 Word count: 21, 357

 Summary: Sana seems to be all up in your business lately, snooping around you. She’s not satisfied nor happy that you’re around Mingyu, so she makes sure to dig up more information about you. You aren’t aware of the danger you’re put in; you just want to enjoy your day with your boyfriend and his friends on their yacht. 

 Taglist: @chal-kagyu @taeyongandfree  @minkwans​ @itsdnguyenxoxo​ @rjsmochii​

 Unable to tag:  @cheolliehugs @3rachaonlyfans  @leahxxiong

 A/N: Don’t get scared by the tags, proceed on reading! :) There will be a final A/N at the end of the chapter, so I won’t say anything else. I’m writing one more standalone oneshot in the Posion universe, it will be Wonwoo’s story. Happy reading, hope you enjoy!

           Windows down and music blaring, Vernon and I rolled down the streets of Seoul. The cool breeze of the warm morning whipped at our hair and I bobbed my head along the rhythm of the music as Vernon and I screamed along to the lyrics. As promised, we went on our breakfast date and now he was driving me to work. One week had passed since Mingyu met my parents and I was mortified last night when I saw him texting with my mother. He said before he left, my mother approached him and asked him to exchange numbers in order to keep in touch. She asked Mingyu to text her anytime he needed something or wasn’t sure about something, or if he wanted to complain about me to her, and she’d gladly answer him. Turns out, they’ve been chatting daily about random things and Vernon was on the verge of dying when I very furiously and loudly told him this, totally disregarding the food that was unchewed in my mouth. The song came to an end and Vernon turned down the volume a bit, stopping at a red light. A sigh left his lips and I looked at him with raised eyebrows.

He glanced at me before he chuckled, “Nothing…I just haven’t done this in long.”

“What? Screamed the lyrics of a song while driving around?” He chuckled again and shook his head.

“No, felt carefree and happy? Something like that…”

“Ay,” I scoffed and gave Vernon a look, “Hoshi – no, Soonyoung has told me about all the trips you and Seungkwan always go on.”

“Yeah girl, but you are cooler than Seungkwan.” I started laughing as the light turned green and Vernon started driving again.

“Too bad I’m taken, and also, never tell Seungkwan that…he’ll skin me alive.” Vernon laughed and nodded, clearly agreeing with me. It wasn’t hard to guess that Seungkwan still hadn’t warmed up to me and he probably never would. Our personalities didn’t match well and both of us found the other one a pushover and annoying. There were rare occasions when we got along really well, like those Monopoly games where we randomly teamed up and surprisingly killed off everyone and won, yeah, these guys played a different version of Monopoly that made sense only to them.

“I don’t understand one thing…” I muttered quietly and Vernon hummed to show me he was listening closely, “You guys keep telling me how nice it is to spend time with me, how I make you forget about your worries blah blah blah…”

“How many of us have said that to you?” Vernon asked with a laugh and I pouted, counting the members of SVT who have told me that at one point.

“I mean…Chan approached me just three months after I met you guys, asking me if when I had free time I’d like to play videogames with him, because he liked my calming presence. Then, sometime when Soonyoung was drunk, he also confessed he really liked me and hoped Mingyu would keep me around forever, then Seokmin and even Jihoon proceeded to tell me that being around me made them feel normal. I’m pretty sure at some point Minghao and Jeonghan too might have said something…Now you and well…Mingyu said so too.”

Vernon nodded with his mouth in an ‘O’ shape and I chuckled as I watched him amused, his expression funny as he hummed deeply.

“Well…like I said, you’re cool and everyone from SVT likes you because you’re nice and very straightforward, which quite frankly, many people are afraid to do when it comes to us. Everyone who knows about our reputation is scared of us, bows down to us and pleases us before we could even voice what we need. I guess you not giving a fuck about who we are is a very liberating feeling, some of us do miss having a normal life, you know?” Vernon’s words settled in my mind and I nodded, offering him a small smile as he pulled up to the bookstore.

“Sometimes it would be just nice to shut up though.” I said with a chuckle and Vernon laughed, “Like that one time when I said Jeonghan couldn’t use a gun because he was a tech genius…and then we went on that duel to find out who was right…all I’m saying is, good thing Wonwoo found us before we could do much damage to each other. Jeonghan was really pissed off and I was ready to shoot him.”

Vernon shook his head as he surely remembered the incident, he said they’ve never heard Wonwoo screaming that loudly before, let alone scolding someone that was older than him. Safe to say, everyone who was present at their vacation house that day swore to never tell Mingyu about the incident, sure that Jeonghan would lose his precious fingers for even daring to challenge me.

“Mingyu shouldn’t fuck up things with you.”

I scoffed and undid my seatbelt, “Slowly I’ve been here for almost a year, Vernon, I think he’s doing fine.”

He offered me a smile as I leaned over the middle console to give him a quick hug, getting my purse from the backseat and then I got out of his car, waving at him as Vernon drove away. I turned and headed inside the bookstore, heading for the backroom. I left my jacket on the hanger and purse in my locker and pulled my hair in a low ponytail, putting on my name tag. I walked to the front of the store and took my place behind the cashier, turning on the computer that was next to it.

“Y/N?” I heard Irene calling from the storage room.

“Me; why was the door unlocked?!” I called back to her as I heard boxes being placed on each other.

“I thought I locked it, sorry!” She called back and I shook my head, sitting in the chair as Irene came up to the front desk with two boxes on top of each other.

“You always forget locking the door, it’s for your own safety.” I scolded my friend and she just rolled her eyes, placing the boxes next to each other.

“I know, I know…now help me unbox these.” She said as she pointed at the second box as she got to open the first one.

“What are these for?”

“Boss texted me saying he got some new books that we’ll have to wrap up in wrapping as he plans on organizing a blind-date Bookfest.” My eyes widened as I opened the box and I nodded at Irene.

“Nice idea, when are we doing it?”

“After he comes back from the conference he’ll be attending, so maybe like…in three weeks?” Irene thought as she took all the books out from the box and then placed a green and blue wrapper on the counter.

“I want the blue one.” I said as I quickly placed my hand on it, Irene going for the same one. She rolled her eyes at me and I stuck my tongue out at her, getting all the books from the box on the counter. She took the green wrapper and tapped the screen of the computer.

“We won’t be open for at least one more hour, put on some nice music.” I chuckled and proceeded to find a radio station that played good music to put on. Irene nodded contently as both of us started wrapping the books up and humming along to the songs. Irene’s round glasses were on the bridge of her nose and her hair was in a bun today. She wore a strapless black top and red dress pants, looking extra sexy.

“Something fancy happening today?” I spoke up after I was done checking her out and Irene gave me a brief glance as she cut up the wrapper for the next book.

“Why?”

“You’re looking a little too hot for someone who came in for work at a bookstore.” I teased her with a smirk, narrowing my eyes at her as she threw me a look. I chuckled and she shrugged, holding the wrapper down for me to tape.

“I spent last night with Jeonghan; he might come around later too…I don’t know yet.” She muttered absentmindedly and I hummed with a smile.

“So…you’re like a thing now?”

“Not really.” She shrugged, looking at me with a grimace, “Definitely could be if I wanted it to. He said he’d like to date me, but I’m really not into that right now.”

I wrapped up the next book, shrugging at her, “I mean, Jeonghan is a pretty nice dude. I don’t know if I’d miss a chance like that, but maybe it’s better if you don’t get too involved…”

I hoped the music drowned out my quiet words, but Irene still heard me well, “Why? Does he give you bad boy vibes too?”

I chuckled and realized Irene meant it seriously, so I cleared my throat and looked at her, “I mean, yeah, he does. I don’t want you to end up hurt, so just go with your intuition.”

“To be honest,” Irene’s voice raised a few octaves as she slammed her hands on the counter, “Mingyu doesn’t seem very trustworthy either, like—Jeonghan might give me bad boy vibes, but Mingyu—he’s just bad news, Y/N.”

“I thought you liked Mingyu?” I asked Irene with furrowed eyebrows and she chuckled, shaking her head.

“Sure, he’s handsome, but there’s something off about him. It’s not even his dominating aura, I might have been drunk in the club but I still saw how possessive he got over you. When you two started dancing, I accidentally made eye contact with him and I got scared he’d rip my head off with the look he was giving me. And other times too—I don’t know, I don’t like the way he thinks you’re ‘his’ when there’s nothing going on between you two.” I placed my hands on the counter as Irene finished her rant with furrowed eyebrows, looking at me questioningly. Since everyone already knew about Mingyu and I being in a relationship, it would’ve been rude to keep her in the dark for longer.

“Actually…Mingyu and I are dating, Irene.” I told my friend and her eyebrows furrowed and then she scoffed.

“Don’t tell me I’m the last one to find out.”

“You aren’t the last one to find out.” I played along with her and she rolled her eyes, leaning against the counter with her arms resting on top of it.

“That’s a lie, how rude of you, I thought you were my friend!”

“I am!”

“For how long have you been dating?” Irene raised her eyebrows and I pursed my lips, my fingers tapping against the counter.

“For little over a month now.” I answered her.

“Is he good to you?” Irene asked with concern lacing her voice and I offered her a small happy smile.

“Too good sometimes.”

“A man is never too good, Y/N.” Irene gave me a look and I started laughing as the front door opened, the bell chiming loudly.

“We are not open yet!” Irene called loudly, and a bit harshly, as she turned around to face the door. My glare was instant as it fell on the person who walked in, her blonde hair falling in waves down her back. She wore dress pants and a low-cut top as she carried her bag on her arm.

“I’m not here to buy a book—” Sana’s shrill voice echoed around the room and I sighed, crossing my arms in front of my chest. I know exactly why she’s here.

“What do you want then?” Irene’s voice was harsh and I didn’t understand why, as she glared at the woman.

“I have some questions to ask Y/N,” Sana’s eyes fell on me and I raised my eyebrows at her, “I never got to investigate her deeper.”

“Oh, so is it ethical to find me at my work place and question me? You aren’t even wearing your uniform.” I snapped at Sana as she walked up to the counter, placing her bag on top of the books wrapped in blue wrapping. Irene stood beside her and she gave me a look, before she looked back at Sana with a glare. I didn’t understand where her sudden rage came from, but I didn’t question it as I embraced myself mentally for whatever questions Sana had. We remained silent, the music playing only, as Sana opened her bag and felt around it before taking out her phone. She typed on it for a few seconds before she placed it on top of the counter, pressing the recording button; she planned to record our conversation.

“This is Officer Minatozaki Sana talking to an affiliate of our main suspect, Kim Mingyu. State your name and age.” Irene’s eyes widened and I sighed as I shook my head at her, cursing Sana in my head for turning up here.

“Oh Y/N, age 25.” I answered monotonously and when Sana gave Irene a glance, as if she was demanding her to leave us alone, Irene gave her a scowl.

“Fine,” Sana muttered to herself, “Where did you grow up and where do you live now?”

“I grew up in a town two hours from here and I live in Seoul now, officer.” I kept my voice leveled as Sana hummed, thankful that she wasn’t asking stupid questions.

“What do you do for a living now and any upper studies that you have?” Irene scoffed at the question but Sana and I ignored her.

“I work at a bookstore and I’m an engineering student.” I raised my eyebrows at Sana when she gave me a sour look, she probably knows Mingyu has an engineering degree too.

“How did you meet Kim Mingyu?” Finally, the questions she was dying to get to, no doubt.

“Through my best friend.”

“Names?” Sana raised her eyebrows and I rolled my eyes, crossing my arms in front of my chest.

“I don’t want to drag him into this.” Sana’s lips pulled in a thin line but she continued on like nothing happened.

“Do you know what Kim Mingyu does for a living, Miss Oh?” I smiled sweetly at Sana as I leaned closer to her phone.

“He has an engineering degree and is a business man now.” Sana hummed, lips pulling into a small smirk.

“What business, Miss Oh?”

“Do you not know, Officer Minatozaki? Do I have to tell you that myself too?” Sana threw me a glare as a chuckle left her lips.

“Of course not, I know it myself too. I just wanted to check if you knew.”

“Next question?” I raised my eyebrows at the blonde and she chuckled again. Mingyu never really told me about his fake business that covered up his illegal deeds, I didn’t actual know what he did, but I wasn’t about to get caught.

“What’s your relationship like with Kim Mingyu?” Her eyebrows twitched at her own question and a big smirked appeared on my lips as I looked her in the eyes smugly.

“I have to say it’s pretty good, officer, I’ve know him for over half a year, and we are dating.”

“Right, so, he’s your boyfriend?”

“He is.” I nodded with a smile, catching the amused look on Irene’s face as she watched our exchange.

“Did he by any chance…offer you some…really expensive goods?”

“None that I can think of, I don’t like gifts.” Sana gave me a glare as she licked her lips.

“Do you know a diamond ring was stolen from the auction we both attended?”

“I didn’t know,” I let fake surprise coat my face as I gave Irene a glance too, seeing her just as surprised even if she didn’t know what we were talking about, “I just went there to have a good time with my boyfriend. I reckon that’s what gave him a bad mood for a week…he bought the ring, but then it disappeared.”

“Exactly, it disappeared. A six-million-dollar worth ring…everyone would be pissed about, not Kim Mingyu, he didn’t have to give his money away in the end.” Sana’s jaw clenched and I offered her a small smile.

“Don’t you think he was pissed too? He wanted that ring after all.” Sana’s expression smoothened out and she sighed quietly, leaning against the counter.

“Did he ever bribe you to do anything for him? Threaten you maybe?”

“Never.” My voice was firm and Sana nodded slowly, lips pulling into a smirk.

“Have you slept with him yet, Y/N? You know…Mingyu can be very persuasive and if he got you into his bed already, I’m assuming he used you to your full capacity—” Sana and Irene both jumped as I slammed my hand down on Sana’s phone, stopping the recording.

“This questioning takes an end here, Sana.” My voice was low and threatening, eyes gazing into Sana’s.

“No, seriously, has he fucked you yet? I bet he hasn’t told you this, but before he even met Momo, I was his favorite thing in the world, Y/N—”

“You heard her, bitch, get out.” Irene snapped loudly, gripping Sana’s arm harshly. Sana just laughed loudly as I tried to remain calm and not lunge at her. If I get angrier than I already am, I’m giving her the satisfaction she wanted. And so, who cares if Sana and him were a thing? It happened a long time ago and Mingyu seems to be over her, I’m not threatened by her anymore. I won’t let her get under my skin anymore, not after I talked to Mingyu about her and the situation they were in. It’s her personality that makes me want to choke her.

Sana got the message that she had nothing to do here anymore as Irene still didn’t let go of her arm, her glare so scary I would’ve run off a long time ago. Sana took her bag and phone and gave me one satisfied smirk as she looked at Irene with superiority.

“Take your hands off, Miss Bae, you wouldn’t want a complaint for aggressing an officer, would you?” Irene opened her mouth to snap back at Sana, her chest raising and falling quickly because of her angered state, but I spoke up.

“I’m also sure you wouldn’t want me complaining to Mingyu about your little visit, right, Sana?” She looked at me and stepped back, ready to leave.

“Of course not, let’s keep it between us, girls.” Sana winked at me and Irene stepped towards her, but I leaned over the counter and gripped her shoulder to stop her. Sana looked satisfied with our reactions and turned her back to us, headed for the front door. As her hand touched the handle, I cleared my throat and she looked back.

“Oh, and…I’m sorry to hear Mingyu used you to your full capacity, Sana, he must have gained a lot quickly in the time you were together if he dumped you. I’ve heard he doesn’t like boring and easy women…” Sana’s expression changed just in a second and she was filled with rage as she took a step towards us, but Irene laughed and pointed at the door.

“Have a lovely day, Sana.” She spoke mockingly as Sana gave us a glare before storming out of the bookstore. The air remained stiff as Irene turned to look at me. I continued to stare at the place Sana stood at, taking a deep breath.

“What the fuck was that?” Irene snapped, eyebrows raised and hands on her waist like a scolding mother.

“Too long of a story…” I muttered as I picked up the blue wrapping, “Let’s get this done, Sana held us up for almost twenty minutes.”

“What a bitch.” Irene muttered under her breath and I snorted, sharing a look of amusement with her.

           The rest of our day continued without Sana bothering us anymore, or anyone from SVT for that matter. Irene told me that Sana kept coming in almost daily, asking to speak to me when I wasn’t even there and would get pissed if Irene refused to give away my contacts. She said she couldn’t stand Sana, that something was definitely off, especially her reaction when Irene refused to tell her where I lived wasn’t very normal. She asked why the police was investigating Mingyu and I lied to her about him being under surveillance for money washing, which probably wasn’t a very big lie, Mingyu might be doing that. The bookstore was busy today and by five o’clock in the afternoon both Irene and I were ready to close up. We had ditched our name tags and Irene applied red lipstick to her lips while I washed my hands in the sink, grumbling about Jeonghan not visiting her today. I chuckled as I pulled on my coat, holding my purse as Irene got her stuff too and we headed to the front of the bookstore. We turned off all the lights and made sure all windows were shut before we left the bookstore to lock up. My eyes fell on the lean body of the man that was leaning against the brick wall around the curb, eyes on us. Jeonghan winked at me and I rolled my eyes, nudging Irene’s side when she was done locking the door.

“Someone’s here for you.” Her head whipped around and a smirk pulled onto her lips when she spotted Jeonghan.

“My efforts to look good today didn’t go to waste.” She exclaimed with a smile and quickly hugged me, taking off towards Jeonghan. I watched them with a shake of my head and Jeonghan smiled at Irene when she stopped in front of him. He hugged her tightly and then made eye contact with me, pointing towards the road which was to my right. I turned my head to look and Wonwoo’s familiar car greeted me, Wonwoo was leaning against his car.

“Good evening, Miss Oh, took you long to notice this fine man waiting for you.” I scoffed and shook my head, looking back at Jeonghan and Irene to wave at them. They called out their goodbyes to us before taking off, Jeonghan’s arm around Irene’s shoulder as she snuggled up into his side.

“Good evening, Mr. Jeon, I was busy watching my friend, my apologies.” I bowed my head deeply, making Wonwoo chuckle as he pushed off his car.

“Haven’t seen Jeonghan with someone in a long time.” He muttered as I approached him, smiling when he opened his arms.

“I haven’t seen you with anyone, Wonwoo…and I’ve known you for a while now.” I raised my eyebrows at him as I hugged the taller man, giggling when his fingers tickled my sides.

“I don’t have time for a serious relationship,” Wonwoo’s deep voice was loud in my ear and he sighed, pulling away, “And I don’t want to put anyone in danger. I’m better off on my own.”

“Are you though?” I raised my eyebrows at him and Wonwoo suddenly looked tired. He just shrugged and opened the backseat door for me.

“Let’s get going before Mingyu could complain to us.” I chuckled and got inside the car, shutting the door for myself as Wonwoo jogged to the driver’s seat. He got in and we both buckled up as he started the car, putting it into motion. I got comfortable against the leather seat of his car and played with the strap of my purse; lips pursed as I thought. Wonwoo wasn’t very talkative, only when he had something exciting to tell you and most of the time I enjoyed the silence when I was with him, but today I was feeling a bit uneasy and wanted a distraction. Sana’s words didn’t bother me, it was what Irene told me that left a sour aftertaste. Why was Sana so set to find out where I live and how she should contact me. I’m sure investigating Mingyu wouldn’t have involved me this much, after all, I answered her questions both times she asked me to.

“Why didn’t Mingyu pick me up?” I spoke up, seeing Wonwoo glance back in the rear-view mirror.

“He told me he’d be home before us, but he had to go to the Bank.” Wonwoo answered, changing lanes as he sped up the car.

“Why?” I asked with my eyebrows furrowed.

“I don’t know, he didn’t tell me…” His voice got quiet and he gulped, “I’m not his second-in-hand, remember? I’m not supposed to know more than I’m supposed to know.”

I bit my lower lip and looked out the window awkwardly, remembering my words when they brought an injured Mingyu into my apartment a week ago, “I didn’t mean to hurt you, but I meant what I said. I trust Seungcheol, there’s a reason why Mingyu chose him for that role.”

“You’re right,” Wonwoo muttered with a nod of his head, “I overstepped some boundaries, I’m only Mingyu’s friend.”

“Thank you for taking care of him, I know he needs it.” I muttered with a sigh and Wonwoo chuckled, nodding his head in agreement. We grew silent as I continued playing with the strap of my purse, trying to decide if talking about Sana to Wonwoo was a good idea or not. Deciding asking him wouldn’t hurt, I spoke up again.

“Wonwoo, please don’t tell Mingyu this, but…Sana came in to question me with the pretext that it’s for the investigation…” Wonwoo’s eyebrows furrowed and I continued talking, “But then Irene told me she’s been coming to the bookstore almost daily and was asking for my contacts and where I lived.”

“We have to tell Mingyu.” Wonwoo’s voice grew hard and I shook my head, catching his eyes through the rear-view mirror.

“No, not yet…I don’t think it’s very important, it just freaked me out a little bit.” He sighed and his lips pulled in a thin line, nodding wordlessly.

“Did they seriously date? Sana said something like that…” Wonwoo scoffed as disgust coated his expression, the car pulled into the neighborhood these two lived in.

“Sana is a sick woman; I have no idea how she’s so high up in the police. She’s been pinning on Mingyu ever since Momo introduced them to each other—”

“Wait, what?” My eyes widened and I leaned forward, eager to hear more, “She said her and Mingyu met before he even knew Momo.”

Wonwoo laughed deeply, shaking his head, “She obviously lied, her and Momo were very close. Once Sana started making advances towards Mingyu and he told Momo about it, Momo flipped and cut ties with Sana. Years later she showed casually in her police uniform at Mingyu’s house and dumped a big folder in front of him, telling him that she knew everything about him and his illegal business.”

Wonwoo stopped in front of Mingyu’s mansion and clicked away on his phone before the gate opened, “Then she proceeded to disappear, Joshua and Jeonghan dug up some information about her and we found out she was lead investigator and started building a case against Mingyu with the pretext that he abused Momo—”

“Which she wasn’t very wrong about.” I interrupted as Wonwoo pulled into the driveway slowly.

“Yeah, she wasn’t, but—she would always come and go. Sometimes disappear for a long period of time and show up suddenly, sometimes for months or weeks or just days. We could never get rid of her, at first I thought she was doing this because Mingyu ruined her best friend. But then I figured it was because she was just obsessed with Mingyu, because he never gave her the attention she craved. She’s harmless if you ask me, but don’t provoke her. You never know what a person is capable of.”

I took a deep breath and let out a long sigh as Wonwoo parked the car inside the garage, undoing his seatbelt. I did so too and he turned the engine off, turning around to look at me, “As long as you’re with us nothing bad can happen to you. Sana is harmless, she’s just trying to scare you off. She’s curious and obsessed about finding out more about you because Joshua and Jeonghan made you look like a ghost, no one can find information about you now…just like the rest of SVT, understood?”

“Understood.” I muttered with a grimace and he chuckled.

“Go ahead, Mingyu’s in his office waiting for you.” I thanked Wonwoo quietly and got out of the car, heading for the door that led inside the house. I passed through the living room and stopped in the hallway, taking off my shoes and jacket, leaving my purse there too. I went up the marble stairs and once upstairs I headed for the door of his study. I pushed the door open but no one was inside, I glanced back at Mingyu’s bedroom door, but if Wonwoo said Mingyu was waiting here for me I should probably stay here, I stepped inside. Two windows were open and the fresh breeze of the evening left a homey feeling in the room, the smell of Mingyu’s cigarettes strong the further I walked inside. My eyes were drawn towards his big study desk and they fell on a simple velvet box. It was small and my heart started beating quickly without a reason. I approached the desk with slow steps, eyes not leaving the velvet box. This can’t be what I think it is…Mingyu wouldn’t—no, I’m probably just overreacting, why don’t I just wait until—

“Sugar,” The sudden voice behind me made me jump. Before I could face Mingyu, he was already behind me, his arms circled around my torso and his chin resting on my shoulder, “How are you?”

I cleared my throat and placed my hands on top of his, gripping them softly, “Glad that work is over, you?”

“Happy to be with you finally.” I chuckled, but my eyes fell on the box once again. Mingyu remained quiet and I gulped, waiting for him to say something. He’s not going to…propose…right? My heart started beating even faster and Mingyu chuckled, making me flinch.

“Why are your ears so red?” He asked amused and pressed a kiss behind my right ear, his hot breath fanning my skin. I cleared my throat and shrugged, moving my head back to be able to look at him.

“It’s probably the lightning.” Mingyu snorted before leaning down to press his soft lips against mine. There was a hint of coffee on his lips as I pressed mine against his, closing my eyes. Mingyu hummed before he pulled back, his lips pulling into a wide smile. My heart felt like it was about to explode as I looked at him, his cute canines showed.

“Why are you so flustered?” He asked with a laugh, leaning down to peck my lips again, “Your whole face is red, sugar.”

“Whatever.” I scoffed and shimmied myself out of his hold, crossing my arms in front of my chest as Mingyu narrowed his eyes at me.

“Well…” He said with a shrug and stepped closer to the desk, placing his hand on the velvet box. I bit my lower lip and looked at him nervously, hugging myself as if I was standing on eggshells, “This is for you, Y/N.”

My eyes fell on the velvet box and I gulped, “For me? Why…”

“Why?” Mingyu rolled his eyes and gripped my arm, detaching it from around my torso, “Because this was for you from the very beginning, I just needed things to cool off a little before I gave it to you.”

“What are you talking about?” My eyebrows furrowed as Mingyu pressed the velvet box into my palm and I detached my other arm from around myself too, gripping the box with both hands. It wasn’t heavy at all. Mingyu wasn’t on one knee, it meant he wasn’t proposing, so that’s good. My heart calmed down a bit and I took a deep breath, Mingyu watched me excited. I looked back at the velvet box and quickly opened it, jaw falling open. It was the diamond ring from the auction. The stone was in rose gold, the ring very simple, as the diamond had a teardrop shape and had a sparkle I haven’t seen before, even in the dim light of the room.

“This is the ring you stole…” I muttered as I continued watching it, unable to look away. I wasn’t into expensive things, but I would lie if I said I didn’t like this ring. It was so beautiful and simple, exactly my taste.

“Well…it was ours since we bought it…” Mingyu corrected me with a small smile, crossing his arms in front of his chest as he leaned against the sofa behind him.

“You never paid for it…” I shot back at him and he chuckled as he nodded down at the ring.

“Put it on, sugar, it’s yours.” I was at a loss of words, not having expected a gift like this one, so I finally gripped the ring and pulled it out of the box. It had a decent weight for something so small and I carefully slipped it onto my left middle finger. I moved my hand slowly, watching the diamond glint as I felt Mingyu’s eyes on me.

“You like it.” His voice was confident and I chuckled as my eyes fell on him.

“I do like it, but I don’t think I should wear it—”

“I don’t want to hear it,” Mingyu rolled his eyes, extending his arms to rest them on my waist, “It’s yours and you will wear it every day, okay?”

“What if I lose it—” Mingyu scoffed and pulled me into him.

“I’ll get you another you.” I huffed and placed my hands against his chest, his eyes fell on my left hand where the diamond ring was.

“I’ll just be careful not to lose this one, okay?” I raised my eyebrows at him and he smirked, looking back at me. He nodded his head and leaned in to kiss my forehead, making me sigh loudly. Sana slipped from my mind as I was in Mingyu’s comforting presence, what Wonwoo told me about her forgotten as I couldn’t stop looking at the ring. It looked good on my finger; I couldn’t lie.

           Seungcheol kept on rambling about his failed exam as we walked down the stairs of our University. It was our last day before the spring break would begin and I couldn’t have been happier. We were getting closer and closer to our graduation; I couldn’t wait to be done with this horrible place. The weather was nice so I ditched my jacket and stuffed it inside my backpack before we left class. Seungcheol’s loud sigh made me look at him with raised eyebrows. He was giving me his usual scowl when he thought I wasn’t listening to him and I rolled my eyes, throwing my arm around his shoulders.

“Stop sulking, you’ll fix your grade in our last semester.” I told him with a smile and he rolled his eyes.

“I don’t have much choice…” He grumbled and I chuckled, shaking his shoulders to cheer him up, “If Mingyu would leave me alone when exams come around, it would be really helpful.”

I knew he was right so I nodded, patting his shoulder, “I’ll talk to him and ask him to leave you alone, okay?”

“Thank you, but there’s certain things he can’t do without me—”

“Why? Did he start listening to you again?” I raised my eyebrows and Seungcheol chuckled, grabbing my arm and taking it off his shoulder.

“Yeah, I heard you lashed out at him when he got injured.”

“Soonyoung told you, didn’t he?” I muttered with a sigh as Seungcheol hooked his arm with mine, “He just can’t shut up.”

“It was actually Wonwoo,” I looked at Seungcheol surprised and he started laughing, patting my hand with his free hand, “Wonwoo always tells me everything, did you not know?”

“How was I supposed to know?!” I exclaimed, eyes wide, as Seungcheol laughed again loudly, “Did he tell you stuff that…maybe you wouldn’t want to know?”

Seungcheol huffed and looked at me amused, his silver lip piercing was glinting, “Did you do anything I wouldn’t want to know about?”

“Uh—” I smiled at him sweetly and snuggled up into my friend’s side, “Definitely not!”

Seungcheol playfully rolled his eyes before they fell on the hand that I placed against his chest. I raised my eyebrows at him as we continued walking around the University, watching his eyebrows furrow.

“Mingyu gave you the diamond ring?” Seungcheol sounded confused and I tilted my head at him, glancing down at the ring on my middle finger.

“Was he not supposed to?” I asked quietly and Seungcheol cleared his throat as if he realized what he had said. He looked up at me and patted my cheek affectionately and shook his head cutely, trying to act as if he said nothing. I gave him a look but he refused to speak as he pulled me after him to cross the road. Students were coming and going and I looked around to make sure I wouldn’t walk into anyone as Seungcheol walked eagerly. Suddenly, my attention got caught by a blonde head in the crowd that was headed our way. A mask was covering their mouth and nose, but the person looked very familiar. Especially the bag they were carrying. My eyebrows furrowed as I kept staring at the woman who reminded me of Sana an awful lot and when Seungcheol stopped walking, I ran into him.

“What are you looking at?” He asked confused and I quickly pulled on his hair, not wanting him to see her. I knew if I told Seungcheol about Sana coming to the bookstore multiple times and even questioning me yesterday and now showing up here, he’d flip and cause a scene. I knew if I felt like something was wrong Seungcheol would sense it and take matters into his hands, but I didn’t want our good moods ruined.

“I thought I saw Joshua.” Was what I came up with instead and Seungcheol groaned, giving me a glare, “What? Am I not allowed to confuse people?”

“Why Joshua—”

“How are things going?” I raised my eyebrows and Seungcheol looked away with a frown, putting distance between us. I looked at him curiously and he shrugged as if he was embarrassed.

“I don’t have much to say, Joshua and Jeonghan are busier sometimes than the rest of the gang. He doesn’t have time to meet up with me very frequently.” I hummed and watched as Seungcheol buried his hands in his pants pockets.

“Why not be a good boyfriend and surprise him?”

“Boyfriend?!” Seungcheol’s eyes turned round and I started laughing as I watched his expression morph into shock, “Please, don’t say that! We aren’t even dating…it’s nothing serious between us, don’t say things like that!”

“Wow, calm down, Cheol…I was just asking, I’m your best friend.” I rolled my eyes and he gave me a grimace about to speak up but I cut him off before he could, “Back to my ring. Who was supposed to get it?”

Seungcheol just sighed and crossed his arms in front of his chest, “Initially no one, but then Mingyu thought manipulating Sana with it would be a good idea.”

Of course, here comes Sana again. Why is this woman suddenly all up in everyone’s business? I swear I can’t stand her.

“Why did she not get it then?”

“She’s not worthy of such ring, Mingyu said so. And he’s been really pissed off lately since she started another investigation against him.”

“What?” I raised my eyebrows, stepping closer to Seungcheol, “Why?”

“Y/N…Mingyu should tell you these things, not me…”

“Well, Mingyu never talks to me, so spill. Now.” I gave Seungcheol a glare and he bit his lower lip, taking his piercing between his teeth for a second before he sighed loudly and stepped even closer.

“One of Seungkwan’s warehouse full of weapons got raided not long ago, because basically Sana planted some false evidence inside and got a warrant to go inside and look. She’s hellbent on taking down Mingyu and that’s why he’s been spending so much time with her. He’s trying to play her, Y/N, manipulate her so that she drops the whole case—”

“Wait,” I raised a hand and took in a deep breath, “Is Mingyu sleeping with Sana to keep her quiet?”

Seungcheol’s eyebrows furrowed and he gave me a look, “Of course not, Y/N. He’s with you.”

“When did that ever stop someone from cheating on their significant other?” I snapped and Seungcheol snorted, fueling my anger. I kept telling myself I was over this after my conversation with Mingyu and that I didn’t give a shit about what Sana and Mingyu did together, but every time I learned a little more about their relationship, the more it angered me. I wanted Sana out of the picture, especially since she was creating problems for Mingyu.

“Mingyu isn’t like that and I’m not taking his side. You know I’m not his biggest fan, but when Mingyu commits to someone, he won’t fuck around with others…figures why getting Sana to give up is taking so long—ow!” Seungcheol exclaimed in pain as I punched his chest hard, giving him a hard glare.

“Why don’t you sleep with Sana?” I scoffed and Seungcheol gave me a very unamused chuckle.

“I’m currently trying to build a relationship with Joshua, that would complicate things.” I sighed quietly and Seungcheol rubbed his chest where I punched him.

“And Sana isn’t obsessed with you…” I muttered and Seungcheol looked at me with an apologetic smile, about to pull me into a hug when the horn of a car made us both jump. I looked behind Seungcheol as he turned around and we both glared at Mingyu as he gave us a very amused smirk.

“Ops, didn’t mean to scare you two.” He touched his lips with his hand in a childish way as he spoke to us through the rolled down window. Seungcheol and I scoffed at the same time and he turned to look at me.

“I guess you have a ride back home now.” He muttered and I chuckled as I quickly gave him a hug.

“Call me when your classes are over, we can have dinner together tonight, but I need to cook something.” Seungcheol hummed as he pulled back from the hug and went to open the door of the Mercedes for me.

“I might be busy tonight, but I’ll give you a call.”

“With Joshua?” I whispered as I got inside the car and Seungcheol sighed, shaking his head at me. I giggled and thanked him when he closed the door, waving at him as Seungcheol walked away waving back at me.

“My kiss?” Mingyu spoke up as Seungcheol and I continued waving at each other aggressively even though he was already on the other side of the road. I laughed and finally looked at Mingyu, tsking at him when he stopped me from waving anymore.

“What good did you do today to deserve this kiss?” I raised my eyebrows at Mingyu and he scoffed, crossing his arms in front of his chest.

“Didn’t know I needed to do anything to get a kiss from my girlfriend.”

“Nothing’s for free, Mingyu.” I shrugged and turned up the volume of the radio, shrugging my backpack off. Mingyu scoffed again, lips jutting out as he was giving me a small glare. I flashed him a smile and dumped my backpack in the backseat, groaning when Mingyu gripped the back of my head and leaned down. He licked his lips and gave me a cheeky smile before pressing his lips against mine. I kissed him back and rolled my eyes, pulling back when he tried moving his lips. His honey scent was strong, as if he put on his cologne right before I got in. Mingyu raised his eyebrows at me and went to kiss me again, but I pocked his left side, making him groan.

“Why did you do that, sugar?” He groaned and pushed away my hand from his wound.

“Wanted to see how your wound is healing.” I said with a shrug and he scoffed, looking back at me.

“So, you poke it to the point it might open up?” I laughed and leaned up to press a kiss against his lips.

“It’s been a week; it can’t open up…hopefully…” I giggled and Mingyu sighed, pressing a kiss against my forehead before he released me. He got comfortable in his seat and I rolled up the window on my side. He put on the signal that he was getting out of the parking spot and absentmindedly my hand went to grip his. I hummed along to the song playing on the radio and I could see Mingyu have a small smile on his lips from my peripheral vision.

“What did you do today?” I asked as Mingyu drove out into traffic. He glanced at me and the smile didn’t disappear from his lips, he rarely smiled, it brought butterflies to my stomach, he was almost always smirking.

“I slept in, because you said I should rest more. Then I had breakfast with Wonwoo and then I headed to the headquarters.” I chuckled and looked at him, raising my eyebrows at him.

“Will you tell me what happened that you’re so happy?” I squeezed his hand when he sped up instead of slowing down at the traffic light turning yellow.

“Consider our deal with the police almost done, I’m really close to getting all investigations stopped.” I hummed and watched Mingyu’s expression turn into a prideful smirk as he got proud of himself. I snickered and raised our hands to press a kiss against his knuckles, it brought a wide smile onto his lips again.

“Isn’t your boyfriend a genius?” He asked and glanced at me, swerving between the three lanes fast.

“Mhm, he is.” I muttered and Mingyu chuckled, his canines poking his lower lips.

“And he’s also really handsome, sexy, irresistible, fuckable—”

“Okay, that’s enough.” I scoffed and Mingyu hit the brakes, sending us a bit forward as the traffic light turned red before he could cross it, “How about from now on I drive, hm?”

“No.” He shook his head and pursed his lips, leaning his head against the headrest, “Admit it though…that I’m all the things I said a second ago.”

I snickered and leaned over the console, letting go of his hand to place it on his thigh. The muscle tensed up underneath my palm and Mingyu turned his head to look me in the eyes. I smirked at him and leaned close enough to brush my nose against his.

“You are…” I pursed my lips and Mingyu moved his head a little to press a very short kiss against my lips, barely touching, “Cute.”

He groaned and rolled his eyes, pushing me away by my head and it made me laugh loudly.

“I’m not cute.” He grumbled to himself as he started driving again, a few cars were already honking behind us.

“You are though…” I muttered with a giggle and he slapped my hand away from his thigh, his tongue poking the inside of his cheek; I knew he was frustrated. I reached my hand out for the button and turned the volume of the radio down, resting my arm on the middle console and my chin in my palm. I watched Mingyu quietly, smiling at him softly. He wore a white form fitting T-shirt and a red, long cardigan with a cream-colored pattern over it. You only ever saw Kim Mingyu wearing sweats inside his house, but today he ditched his dress pants and wore silky and comfortable looking cream-colored pants. His hair was down, fanning his forehead, his undercut was slowly growing out.

“You’re staring.” He muttered, his eyebrows slightly furrowed, as he turned the steering wheel, turning onto a different street.

“Am I not allowed to?” I muttered back and he nodded, lips jutting out again.

“Of course, yes, especially if you’re staring at me. But something’s bothering you now, so shoot.” I sighed and looked down at the middle console, tracing my fingers against the hard fabric.

“I’m pretty sure I saw Sana today at the University…” I spoke up with a hint of anger in my voice and Mingyu’s eyebrows furrowed, “And she came to the bookstore yesterday to question me. Irene said she kept coming around and wanting to speak to me even before.”

Mingyu hummed and drove slowly as there was a slight traffic jam, “She told me she had to question you because you’re my girlfriend, don’t worry about her, sugar. Sana is harmless, she wouldn’t dare touch you.”

I shrugged and sat back in my seat, looking out the window, “I don’t know…I don’t like her much. Irene doesn’t either, that says a lot, she usually likes most people. And Wonwoo and Vernon…the list goes on, even Seokmin hates her.”

“She’s got a difficult personality, but, like I said—I’m almost done with the police, so that demands a celebration!” Mingyu exclaimed, looking at me as he came to a stop in front of my apartment building. I raised my eyebrows in curiosity, deciding to ignore how quickly he brushed off the topic with Sana.

“What do you have in mind?”

“I’m sailing out tomorrow with the boys for a day—”

“Sailing out?” I interrupted Mingyu quietly, eyebrows furrowing.

“Yeah, I have a yacht.” Mingyu said with a shrug and I scoffed, undoing my seatbelt.

“Of course, you have a yacht.” I grumbled to myself and Mingyu chuckled, leaning closer to me.

“I had in mind that you join us.” I smiled at him and almost closed the gap between us.

“That sounds awesome.” His eyes widened and I chuckled, pressing a kiss against his cheek before I grabbed my backpack from the backseat.

“Wait—you’re not going to argue with me about it? You’re just—coming? Without me having to pester you until you have no choice but to say yes?”

I started laughing as I opened my door, looking at Mingyu amused, “My boss is going away for some conference, University is over for two weeks since I have spring break, I don’t see why I wouldn’t want to join you guys.”

“Huh,” Mingyu huffed and rubbed his chin with a teasing glint in his eyes, “I feel like someone is getting soft.”

“You’ve got the wrong feel then!” I flipped him off before closing the door of the Mercedes and Mingyu started laughing. I raised my eyebrows at him and wiggled my fingers at him before I turned around and started walking towards the entrance of the building.

“You should wear those jeans more! It brings out the roundness of your ass!” A few people glanced my way who were passing by when Mingyu yelled out of his car. I rolled my eyes and continued walking, ignoring his words. He drove away as I went to type in the passcode and I sighed, running through the outfit ideas I had in mind for tomorrow.

           In the end, after looking at the weather forecast, I settled on wearing a white crop top and a muddy green dungaree over it. I packed a thicker jacket in my backpack and braided my hair in two, wanting it out of my face for the day. By the time I was ready, Seungcheol was knocking on my front door, looking tired. We didn’t end up having dinner together, I don’t even know at what hour he returned, but the bags underneath his eyes were a good indication that he didn’t get much sleep. He passed me some of his breakfast he had cooked and then we were off together, headed for the docks, where Mingyu’s yacht apparently was. Seungcheol wasn’t very talkative as he drove down the streets and I remained silent, humming quietly to the songs played on the radio. Once we got the docks, I spotted Mingyu and Wonwoo’s familiar cars as Seungcheol had to park around the corner as there was no space on that street anymore. When we got out, the salty air and smell of freshly caught fish hit my nostrils hard and Seungcheol had a grimace on his face as we got our backpacks and walked towards the docked smaller ships and yachts. There was music coming from the last one and I knew it was Mingyu’s, the yacht was huge. And Seokmin and Seungkwan were shouting at each other, so that gave it away too. Seungcheol quietly greeted the few fisherman that were by their boats and I followed suit, bowing at them politely, as they seemed happy to see Seungcheol there. Maybe he comes here often, he never said anything about it to me. When we got to the yacht, the little board was still lowered and Vernon’s eyes lit up when he spotted us. The yacht had three levels and it was long and spacious. I thanked Vernon when he helped me onto the yacht and took Seungcheol’s backpack as he followed suit, raising the board that created a little gate between the concrete and the yacht, apparently everyone was here. Seungcheol closed the small door and placed the board by it, taking his and my backpacks as well.

“I’ll put these in my room, if you need something, you can get it from there later—”

“Mingyu asked me to take Y/N’s stuff to his room.” Vernon interrupted Seungcheol and rubbed the back of his nape awkwardly as he looked between me and Cheol. I chuckled and took my backpack back from Seungcheol.

“Go on then, Vernon will take me there?” I asked, raising my eyebrows at Vernon.

“Sure.” He said with a grin and took off, I followed closely behind. We went to the back of the yacht, Seungcheol was hot on our tails, and I was surprised that there were stairs leading even downstairs. We entered the inside of the yacht and it was an open space, resembled a living room. I was confused when Seungcheol walked downstairs but Vernon took us upstairs.

He noticed my expression and chuckled, “There’s more space underneath the deck, so we usually take up those rooms.”

“How many of you sleep down there?” I asked curiously as we got up to the second floor and Vernon stopped to think for a second.

“There’s five rooms so…nine people can sleep there.” My mouth fell a bit open and Vernon chuckled at me as he led me towards a room that stood separately. The hallway on this floor was smaller and to your left there were three doors, leading to three different rooms. And then there was the room Vernon was leading me to, which seemed to be the biggest since there were no more doors on its side.

“Is this like the master bedroom or something?” I asked quietly as Vernon knocked on the door, but no one answered.

“Yeah, but we have another one downstairs too. Not as big as this one, but it’s fairly larger than the other regular bedrooms.” Vernon slid the door open and I was taken aback by the space in the room. I didn’t think there’d be this much space on a yacht. I’ve never even been on a yacht before.

“Wow, this is huge.” I muttered and Vernon shrugged, looking around.

“No one really sleeps in here unless they are very drunk and need to be left alone.” Vernon explained and I scoffed, turning to look at him.

“I hope I won’t have to share the bed with a third person, Mingyu already takes up all the space.” I said with a grimace and Vernon laughed, walking back to the sliding door.

“So, you’ve slept together already?” He had a teasing glint in his eyes and I threw him a glare and crossed my arms in front of my chest, “Yeah, yeah…not my business. Mingyu is upstairs in the captains room, you can head up if you want to.”

I nodded wordlessly and Vernon left, leaving the door open. I looked around the room again and walked up to the big windows, admiring the view from here. This room even had a mini balcony with two chairs and a little round table between them, I figured I could drink coffee tomorrow morning there while watching the sunrise. The bed was placed in the middle of the room, pressed up against the big windows so that wherever you turned your head, you’d be able to see the sea. There were four six drawer chests, two to the left and two to the right as you entered the room. A small bookcase which was more for decoration and a human sized mirror sat leaning against the wall. There were a few plants inside the room and I took my backpack and placed it on top of one of the chests, not finding it necessary to unpack. We’d be headed home tomorrow in the morning, I never really liked packing so I saved myself from having to do it again tomorrow. The sudden hum of the engine caught my attention and I walked to the windows again, peeking outside. Small ruffles of water came from underneath the yacht and slowly but surely, we took off. A sudden excitement I wasn’t feeling until now enveloped me and I smiled to myself, finding the butterflies in my stomach amusing.

“Someone’s excited.” I jumped and turned towards the door, clearing my throat, “Mingyu didn’t tell us you were coming.”

The excitement I felt subsided due to Seungkwan’s hostile tone and the scowl he had on his lips, “Last time I checked, Mingyu didn’t have to tell you anything about what he was doing or not.”

“Abusing the power your boyfriend has, aren’t you?” I scoffed and crossed my arms in front of my chest, Seungkwan smirked at my reaction.

“How is this abusing of his power? It’s his yacht, he brings whoever he wants on it.” Seungkwan rolled his eyes and stepped away from the doorway.

“It’s our yacht, actually, but whatever. The walls aren’t as thick as they seem, so don’t do anything funky. I’m across from you and I would like to sleep tonight.” He said sassily, pointing his forefinger at me accusingly. I rolled my eyes and took off, coming to the door.

“Go to bed before we do then.” I snapped back at Seungkwan and he scoffed, making room for me as I exited the master bedroom. I slid the door closed behind me and pushed past Seungkwan, he scoffed again. I went to the short staircase that led upstairs, onto the third level, and Seungkwan headed to the one that led downstairs. We shared a look of disgust before both of us stormed our ways, my footsteps loud as I stomped up the stairs. This was just a little cabin for the one who operated the yacht and I found Mingyu sitting on a white chair, his hands on a round wheel. There were different lights turned on on the control panel in front of him and I neared him, looking at the big table curiously.

“Sugar,” Mingyu called out and I looked down at him as he smirked at me, “What do you think?”

“It’s bigger than I expected it to be…” I muttered as I looked ahead, we were getting further away from the docks.

“Have you ever been on a yacht before?” Mingyu asked wonderingly and I scoffed as his arm sneaked around my waist.

“Of course not, you know my parents now, you saw we aren’t rich.” Mingyu hummed and pressed some buttons that I had no idea what were supposed to do and suddenly he pulled a lever and the yacht took a slower speed.

“Money isn’t everything if you aren’t happy and fulfilled.” Mingyu whispered under his breath and I looked at him, biting my lower lip. I really wanted him to share his childhood with me, I wanted to know more about him. I wanted to understand him and learn how to treat him right. I was afraid he wasn’t opening up because he didn’t trust me or worse…was only playing with me. He suddenly grabbed a walkie-talkie and pressed a button, static coming over.

“Grab the anchor, we are stopping here.” He talked into it and I glanced around, being able to make out the outlines of the city still. We didn’t go very far, as he said we wouldn’t, maybe a good thirteen minutes away? I wasn’t looking at the time.

“Copy!” Came an enthusiastic voice over the walkie-talkie, I realized it was Chan, and Mingyu chuckled as he shut it off. He looked up at me and turned his chair around, making me stand between his legs. I let my arms rest around his shoulders as he pulled me into himself by my waist, hugging onto my torso tightly. I ran my fingers through his silky hair softly, letting him burry his head in my stomach. Suddenly, he sighed and my eyebrows furrowed. I assumed he was just tired, maybe Seungcheol was with him and they both stayed up until late, but something rather was on his mind that was bothering him.

“What’s the matter?” I asked quietly, massaging his scalp in the process of playing with his hair. I knew it relaxed him, he really liked it.

“A new gang joined us, but I’m unsure if it was a good decision.” Mingyu mumbled and I hummed, “There’s a lot of members and they are all young, I don’t want them to cause problems for us. But one of them is Sana’s right hand man…I really needed them on my side, you know, sugar?”

“You do what you have to do; don’t worry about things that haven’t happened yet and might not even happen.” I said quietly and he chuckled, nuzzling his face against my stomach.

“I’m a Mafia leader now, I have to think of everything, Y/N, even of things that won’t happen.”

“Well then just be yourself with them. People who don’t know you are scared of you…even your own members have a certain restraint when it comes to you. Show them they can’t mess with you, don’t allow them to make mistakes.” Mingyu chuckled and pulled back, my fingers stilled in his hair.

“You sound like you have experience in this field.”

“No, I’m just observant and smart, Mingyu.” I said with a chuckle and he smirked, standing up. I looked up in his eyes and he just grinned before walking us backwards until my back was pressed against the window. I raised my eyebrows at him and he turned my head to the right with his fingers, leaning in.

“Sometimes you can see dolphins, if you’re lucky you might see some too.” He muttered quietly in my ear and my eyebrows furrowed.

“That’s not true, I haven’t heard of dolphins habituating this sea.” Mingyu chuckled and kissed my cheek.

“You don’t believe someone who’s been sailing out here for years? Seungkwan took photos one time, ask him to show you.” I rolled my eyes and turned my head to look at Mingyu.

“Seungkwan and I aren’t on good terms, I’d rather not talk to him at all if I could.” Mingyu chuckled and caressed my cheeks.

“Not everyone can like you.” I rolled my eyes and leaned in to kiss him, pulling back before he could deepen the kiss. Mingyu smirked but his eyebrows were slightly furrowed and I raised mine at him, silently asking what was wrong.

“Last week, you found out I was an engineering student and that I’m an orphan.” I gulped and nodded, searching for Mingyu’s gaze, “Well, I actually know who my mother is. She couldn’t raise me or my sister so she gave us up to an orphanage. She left right after she gave birth to my sister, I don’t have many memories of her at that time because I was too little.”

I knew Mingyu hated being pitied so I tried to remain with a neutral expression as we maintained eye contact, my heartbeat quickened just a little, “You hear all sorts of bad stuff about orphanages and meanwhile some are wrong, most are true. I remember taking a lot of care of my sister, never letting anyone besides the nurses close to her. I made sure she was fed and cared about, I even played with her when they’d allow me. But when she was around one year old, a family came and took her away. I was devastated for a long time, until I realized she was better off at that family. Boys and even some girls started picking on me as I started growing older and I realized my little sister was in a loving family, protected from the evils I had to go through, but I wasn’t too mad about it. I always envied her for being chosen, but I still loved her very much. I still do, she’s grown into a powerful woman, sometimes you remind me of her.”

“You remained in touch with her?” I found my voice, it was quiet, but I was curious how he maintained keeping tabs on her sister.

“The family felt bad for separating us, so they let me visit her weekly. I hoped they’d grow fond of me and adopt me as well, but they only wanted a daughter. And then maybe I was around eight years old, when my mother showed up and took me back home. She suddenly had money and a stable job, it looked like she fixed her life. I don’t know how she got me back, but maybe I would’ve been better off at the orphanage. She wasn’t a very nice person and the men she had around her were definitely not good people. I got involved into street gangs when I was just nine, Y/N. Out of curiosity, boredom and dumbness, I guess. My mother didn’t care about me and my sister belonged somewhere, so I wanted to feel what she felt. I thought joining that gang was the right choice, but it obviously wasn’t…that’s why I am here today.” A small smile, a sad and tired one, appeared on his lips and I sighed quietly, rubbing his cheek lovingly with my thumb.

“I shortly after that met Wonwoo, then Vernon and Seungkwan. The others came along slowly, it wasn’t until I got into a fist fight and killed someone that people started getting interested in me. Other gangs wanted to recruit me and when I turned fifteen I realized that if I was so important that everyone wanted me, then why wouldn’t I create something that was only mine? If I alone were a weapon, why not use it to my advantage? Wonwoo and I started recruiting people and that’s when Junhui and Minghao joined us; I’m still sure they didn’t one-hundred percent understand what we were proposing to them but they went along, because everyone thought of them as bad boys. Vernon and Seungkwan followed us without questions, Seungkwan owed it to me, he had sworn to stay by my side no matter what after the generous money I started to give him to fix his own mistakes, and Vernon never does anything without Seungkwan. Seungcheol and Chan joined us at the same time and I realized I needed someone to help me out, so after a year of testing Seungcheol, I finally decided it would be him. The others came along quickly after, willingly or recruited by one of us. I didn’t have an easy childhood, I worked hard and did bad things to get to where I am right now, I refuse to let someone as stupid as Sana ruin everything I have. We’ve expanded so much that other gangs belong to us now, I’m their boss. People fear me and respect me. I have you now too…my life is finally coming together, so I’m holding on tightly to everything I can.” Mingyu’s jaw clenched as he studied my face, but all I could do was smile at him. He wasn’t the best person, but he did everything he had to do with a reason. I didn’t always do the right things either, I wasn’t about to judge him for them. Not when he finally opened up and told me so much about himself. I was happy that he trusted me with the information and I just kept smiling, confusing Mingyu a bit.

“So, like…you’re cool with the things I just told you?” I chuckled and pressed a kiss against his lips, grinning at him. He looked lost and it was so cute.

“Everyone has their own story and I’ve been waiting patiently to hear yours. I’m fine with what you told me, if you’re scared I’ll run away now, I won’t…besides, I think you’d find me even if I did.” Mingyu chuckled and nodded.

“I’d find you under five seconds, so don’t try doing that.” I chuckled and nodded in acknowledgment.

“What about your sister though? You still keep in touch?” I asked curiously, wanting to know more about her. Maybe even meet her.

“Of course, but she moved away two years ago and only visits during Christmas and New Year.”

“Can I meet her this year?” I raised my eyebrows and Mingyu smirked, leaning closer.

“Of course, she’ll be your sister-in-law, I think it’s only right you get to know each other.” I rolled my eyes as he pressed a kiss against my lips.

“Wait until I graduate at least.”

“Your mother told me weddings are best during the summer, maybe we should—”

“Stop!” I gave Mingyu a glare, pushing him back a bit, “We aren’t even engaged and stop talking about stuff like that with my mother, it’s embarrassing! Just delete her number! Block it!”

Mingyu laughed and stepped away fully, our arms detached from each other, “And miss all the baby pictures she sends me? Can’t do that sugar…”

“Oh my God!” I exclaimed embarrassed and Mingyu chuckled, headed for the stairs.

“Let’s go downstairs, see what we can do.” I huffed to myself and tried to hide the blush on my cheeks but the wide smirk on Mingyu’s lips was a tale tell sign he saw it.

           We spent the day preparing food and sharing stories. Some of the guys started drinking right away as the yacht stopped and by lunch they had to be taken care of, so we cut them off the alcohol until they recovered a little bit. I didn’t find drinking on a yacht very smart or safe, and when Seokmin really happily told me they’ve been doing it for ages and only three times did someone fall into the water and almost drown, I made sure to take away the beer he was holding onto so tightly. Minghao, Mingyu, Seungcheol and Joshua were the chefs of the day and I was hanging out with Chan and Jun as we played music. Wonwoo had disappeared as everyone started doing something and Chan said that he was either reading or sleeping in his room, so I decided not to bother him. Vernon and Seungkwan were laying on some towels on the deck’s front balcony, wearing swimming trunks and conversing quietly. I didn’t find the weather warm enough to be tanning, but if they weren’t cold I wasn’t about to interrupt their fun time. Soonyoung, Jihoon and Seokmin were the ones that needed to be taken away from the alcohol as they had a head start early in the day. Jihoon ended up sleeping on the couch in the open living room, meanwhile Soonyoung and Seokmin kept coming and going from the kitchen, saying they’d help anyone who wanted their help. Jeonghan wasn’t very talkative this time and he said he’d be in the captain’s room if anyone was looking for him, he said he’d take a nap up there after he made sure everything was fine with the yacht. The day was entertaining and relaxing, I found myself laughing almost all the time as someone was always doing or saying something funny. I have hung out with the boys as a whole before, but at the headquarters they seemed to be on high alert and tense all the time. The first time I saw them being this carefree and happy was when Seungcheol introduced me to everyone officially. I was grateful for Mingyu’s invitation, I really needed to relax a little bit. Lately too many things were on my mind and as if university wasn’t stressful enough, Sana lurking around us constantly was really off putting. I tried to act mature after the talk Mingyu and I had about her, and after even Seungcheol reassured me, but it was a bit weird how uncaring Mingyu acted when I brought her up. Maybe it was because he didn’t want me to flip on him again, or maybe he wasn’t telling me about something. As long as he didn’t do anything that would directly hurt me, it was fine with me.

The day went by quickly, since when someone is feeling really good time seems to be flying, and we found ourselves gathered at the table inside. The sun was gone and the weather turned cool as we shut all doors of the yacht to stop the cold from coming inside. Someone turned on the heating and as we put all the food the boys cooked for lunch and some for dinner, I appreciated the warm breeze inside as it warmed my cold arms up. I was too lazy to get my jacket and not tipsy enough to feel hot like Jeonghan, Seokmin and Soonyoung were feeling. I sat in a random chair at the table as Vernon placed some wine in front of me with a wink. I grinned up at him and took a sip from the glass, humming appreciatively.

“See? A friend never forgets.” He said with a wink and I patted the chair next to me, asking him to sit there. He gladly took the seat and slowly everyone gathered at the table. It was loud as I placed some food on my plate, my chopsticks getting stopped by someone else’s. When I looked up I came face to face with Wonwoo’s mischievous grin as he stole the piece of meat I wanted and I scoffed, taking another one.

“So childish…” I said with a grimace and he raised his eyebrows at me mockingly, even though I’m sure he couldn’t hear me as he was sitting across from me. Chan was sitting to my right and my eyes widened in horror when I saw him trying to pour beer in my wine glass.

“Yah, Chan!” I exclaimed and gripped his wrist before he could tilt the beer bottle and his eyes widened.

“Yes?” He asked confused and I sighed, lowering his wrist carefully to place the beer bottle back on the table.

“I have wine in that glass dude…” I told him with an exasperated huff and Chan chuckle, his ears turning red.

“Oh, sorry…I thought it was my glass.” I shook my head at him and he abandoned trying to find his glass as he drank out of the bottle. I started eating and groaned at the explosion of different ingredients once I bit into the meat. I wasn’t a big fan of it, but the condiments on this one were amazing. It tasted perfect.

“Tasty, right?” Minghao asked with a grin, he was sitting between Chan and Seokmin, as he looked at me proudly.

“Very tasty!” I exclaimed and he chuckled, biting into his own meat. Someone made a mix of rice with different vegetables, like: corn, pepper, peas, carrots; and that one was amazing too. As I reached for the salad that was in front of me, a plate from Wonwoo was passed to me. Food from each dish was on it and I looked at him surprised, taking it reluctantly.

“From Mingyu.” He said and nodded his head towards his left where Mingyu was sandwiched between Jun and Jihoon. I gave Mingyu a smile and he raised his glass in salute before downing his drink. Seungkwan, of course, had to scoff when he saw Wonwoo passing me the plate and Vernon elbowed him, dumping the noodles he didn’t like on Seungkwan’s plate.

“Can’t you let her live for a second?” I heard Vernon scold Seungkwan as he continued glaring at me. I chuckled and tapped Vernon’s thigh to let him know that it was fine and he really didn’t bother me, to be honest, I was used to Seungkwan already. Most of the time I ignored him, I would even forget sometimes that he was with us. I took another big bite of the food and happily munched on it, everything tasted so good, I’d have to learn some tricks from the guys who cooked today. Realizing I couldn’t eat all the food that was given to me by Mingyu, I looked around the table, trying to find Seungcheol. He was sitting close to the end of the table, to my left and across from me, and I almost started laughing when I saw his arm hooked with Joshua’s. The two were eating quietly with their free hands, sometimes muttering to each other, but other then that they weren’t paying attention to the people around them.

“Cheol!” I called out loudly to get his attention and his head whipped up, looking at me questioningly. I almost started laughing when I saw the red tint of his cheeks and how his eyes darted between me and the few other guys looking at them. Jeonghan started giggling and pointed a finger at Joshua and Seungcheol, but he said nothing as he looked at me and winked before going back to eating. I chuckled to myself as I grabbed the plate Mingyu gave me, I had already placed what I wanted from it on my own plate.

“What?!” Seungcheol snapped and Joshua gave him a look before smiling at me warmly. I giggled as I stretched my arm out, asking Vernon to pass it on to them.

“No need to be so hostile, Cheol, just wanted to feed you some more food.” I said with a shrug and he shook his head, taking the plate from Seungkwan, who stole two broccolis off the plate.

“Thank you.” Seungcheol flashed me a smile and I huffed, taking my glass to sip from my wine. Chan took it as his cue to grab his own bottle of beer and clink it against my own glass with too much force. He giggled when I gave him a warning look to stop, and he just leaned his head on my shoulder. I sighed and drank my wine, eyes falling on Mingyu. He was eating rapidly, as if he hasn’t eaten yet today, nodding to everything Jun was saying to him. Wonwoo was listening to their conversation too as he said a few words here and there, and as if Mingyu sensed my gaze, he looked up. I offered him a small smile and he winked at me, turning his head back towards Jun as the later started getting louder and louder while telling his story.

            After everyone had eaten enough we gathered the little leftovers and placed them inside the fridge as the guys decided to play some drinking games. The music playing was louder than earlier in the day and Chan and Wonwoo were happily singing into a microphone. I played two drinking games with the eight guys who decided to have some more fun, but decided that I was too tired to stay with them anymore. I had brought a book with me and I didn’t get to read yet today, so I decided to wish everyone a good night and retreat to the master bedroom. It wasn’t early in the evening at all, yet Jeonghan and Soonyoung called me a party popper and a grandma. I just laughed before heading up the stairs, bumping into Seungkwan as he just left the bathroom.

“I hope you didn’t puke in there.” I muttered and Seungkwan scoffed, crossing his arms in front of his chest. His eyes didn’t sit right, and his lips were pushed in a pout.

“I’m drunk, not stupid.” Seungkwan slurred and I chuckled, walking around him.

“You’re actually both.”

“Oh Y/N!” He exclaimed, eyebrows furrowing as he pointed a finger at me, “Don’t disrespect me!”

“Treat me like a decent human being then.” I snapped back at Seungkwan and he scoffed, roughly rubbing his face with his hands.

“Do you like Vernon?” Seungkwan’s eyes were narrowed into slits and I started laughing, leaning against the sliding doors of the bedroom.

“Sure, and I’m also dating Mingyu. And behind their backs I’m actually having an affair with Wonwoo and actually! Seungcheol and I got married two years ago; bet Joshua and Jeonghan couldn’t find that information about us!” I knew the alcohol in my system was making me meaner and I wasn’t even tipsy, I could hold my liquor well.

Seungkwan scoffed and rolled his eyes, “Whatever, I just don’t want my friend to suffer because of a stupid girl—”

“Alright, if you’re here to insult me, suit yourself, Seungkwan. I have nothing against you, but maybe you should stop being a stuck-up whiney bitch—”

“A bitch?!” Seungkwan’s voice raised volumes and I smirked, “You’re one to talk! When you’re a gold digger, you just want Mingyu’s money—”

“I’m a what?!” I exclaimed, feeling my anger suddenly burst through me.

“You heard me! I told him you were nasty. I bet you’re the one who ratted us out to the police—” Before Seungkwan could sputter more gibberish, I lunged at him, totally disregarding my actions. Whenever I drunk even a little bit, I was ready to fight anyone. Seungkwan just so happened to pull the wrong strings tonight and as I gripped onto his blonde hair, which actually had a nice texture, a loud cry left his lips. I didn’t care who I was attacking, I was seeing red as I felt offended by his words.

“I’m the gold digger when I’ve been doing everything to ignore and avoid Mingyu?!” I screamed as I tugged on his hair and Seungkwan cried out again, gripping my wrists with his hands. I was sure no one would hear the commotion upstairs as the music was playing really loudly due to the boys wanting to have a party.

“You figured out Mingyu’s weakness!” Seungkwan exclaimed and suddenly I felt fingers around one of my braids, “He always loved a little push and play game, it was part of your plan all along!”

I exclaimed when he tugged on the braid, my scalp itched from the force, but it only fueled my anger. I fisted his hair and went to tug on it, but Seungkwan did something with his legs and I was on my back on the floor, pain shooting up through my spine.

“What the fuck?!” I exclaimed, eyes wide, as I looked up at Seungkwan who was straddling me. Our hands were finally not tugging on each other’s hair anymore, but Seungkwan looked angry that I attacked him.

“We are mafias now! Let me show you what we do to people who play with us.” That sinister smirk I always hated suddenly slipped onto his lips and I started kicking the floor with my legs, blocking his arms from reaching for my neck.

“Are you bowling up there—holy shit! Mingyu, Vernon, Jihoon! Come here!” I heard someone shouting from the stairs as I punched Seungkwan’s chest hard, knocking the air out from his lungs. His eyes widened and I took it as the opportunity to latch onto his hair again and try to push him off. I heard loud thuds over the music and suddenly I saw two people leaning over Seungkwan. I didn’t focus on them, I tugged harder on Seungkwan’s hair, making him scream out in pain.

“Let go of me! I’m going to kill this bitch!” Seungkwan screamed as his arms were being held back, so that he couldn’t reach me. I felt hands on top of mine, trying to pry them out of Seungkwan’s hair. He cried out again and trashed a bit around in pain.

“Sugar, let go of his hair.” I heard Mingyu’s voice shout over the loud music coming from downstairs, but my eyebrows furrowed and I refused to do what he told me. Someone nudged my legs and I hissed, thinking it was Seungkwan, and tugged harder.

“Yah!” By this time, I knew even more of the guys were watching us, I could hear laughter coming from the stairs, “Let go of me Oh Y/N!”

“You want me to let go now, huh?!” I screamed and Seungkwan whined, his lips turning down as he looked me in the eyes.

“I’m sorry, okay?! Just stop!”

“Sorry about what?!” I raised my eyebrows at a despaired Seungkwan, enjoying the pain on his face.

“That I called you a bitch and gold digger and—”

“What is—Boo Seungkwan!” Seungcheol’s voice topped everyone’s as someone gripped my elbows, the hands from my own disappearing.

“Get off her right now!” Seungcheol hollered and I felt the grip on my elbows tighten.

“Let go, sugar, right now.” Mingyu’s stern voice sent shivers down my spine and I finally looked up, making eye contact with my boyfriend. He was glaring hard and I very reluctantly released the hold I had on Seungkwan’s locks. In a second, Seungkwan was hauled off me and I was tugged up like I was a rag doll. Mingyu looked pissed as he looked at Seungkwan with a glare, before directing it at me.

“What the fuck are you doing?!” It was Seungcheol who exclaimed, pointing his finger at me and then at Seungkwan, “Don’t you know better?!”

He slapped Seungkwan’s cheek, not hard at all, just in warning as he looked at Vernon and Jihoon, “Take him downstairs, Joshua and I are switching rooms with him and Soonyoung.”

“You better go to sleep Seungkwan and stay away from Y/N, or I swear to God—” Mingyu’s jaw was clenched as he held onto me, pulling me slightly behind him. Seungkwan looked embarrassed and angry as he looked at his two bosses, lowering his head.

“Whatever.” He muttered before shrugging Jihoon and Vernon’s hands off him, turning to go to the stairs. The other guys were standing on the stairs, watching us with amused faces. Soonyoung and Seokmin even had their phones in their hands, which they quickly put away when Seungkwan saw them.

“Wait,” I called out with a huff, rubbing my forehead as I forced the next words out of myself, “I’m sorry too. For calling you stupid and a bitch.”

Very loud giggling followed my words and Jun gave Seungkwan a pat as he threw me a look, “Whatever.”

I scoffed and tried stepping towards him, but Mingyu held me back, “We’re going to sleep, now.”

“I’m not—” Mingyu didn’t let me talk as he opened the sliding doors and pushed me inside. I huffed and turned to glare at him, trying to head outside, but he slid the door shut.

“Go back to your business!” Mingyu called through the door, as he locked it, and I could hear the loud footsteps of the others as they descended the stairs quickly. I continued to glare at Mingyu as I crossed my arms in front of my chest.

“Seriously?” He raised his eyebrows at me and I looked away, “I thought you were smarter than that, sugar.”

“He called me a gold digger!” I exclaimed, angry again, “And said I’m playing with you! That I went to the police and ratted you out!”

“But you know those aren’t true, why did you bother engaging in something with Seungkwan? You know he’s childish—”

“He hurt my pride.” I snapped, giving Mingyu another glare as he shook his head with a tired sigh, “I wouldn’t even be here if it wasn’t for you, Mingyu. I can take a few hurtful words once in a while but not when they are constantly aimed at me. I told you months ago that I wanted nothing to do with you—”

“Shut up!” Mingyu snapped, marching up to me, “I’m not doing this. I don’t want you to remind me again that everything happens because of me. You could have said no—”

“Oh my God!” I threw my hands up, giving Mingyu an incredulous look, “Do you even hear yourself right now? Said no? How many times did I say no, you asshole?!”

“Don’t call me an asshole.” He muttered lowly as he gripped the back of my head, pulling me in close. I glared at him and tried to take deep breaths to calm my erratic heart and stupid mind. Why was I even fighting with Mingyu? He didn’t do anything.

“I’m fed up with people constantly judging me for being with you.” I muttered and sighed, looking away from Mingyu.

“And I’m fed up with you constantly blaming everything on me, okay? You knew what you were getting into, stop whining about it all the time.” I gave Mingyu a look and he just glared back. He wasn’t wrong, but it was always easier to blame someone else. And in this case, I had a right to blame him, he really did cause many of the things I accuse him of. I took in his features as Mingyu held me in place, his eyebrows were furrowed and his lips in a tight line. I raised my hand and softly pressed my fingers on the skin between his eyebrows. His features instantly softened and Mingyu sighed, his firm grip turning tender on the back of my head.

“I’m sorry.” I muttered and offered him a small smile, closing the gap between our bodies as I leaned into Mingyu.

“I’m sorry too.” Mingyu sighed and sneaked his arms around my torso as I let my hands rest around his shoulders. The music was thumping loudly from downstairs and we could hear the cheers of the boys as they were probably playing some game. Someone was badly singing into the microphone and I would have smiled if Mingyu wouldn’t have leaned in to kiss me. His soft lips pressed against mine and I closed my eyes, melting into his touch. I felt warm in his arms and Mingyu’s lips moved slowly against mine, taking his time. I let my hands run through his hair, softly tugging on it, like I knew he liked it, and Mingyu moaned quietly, opening his mouth a little. I slipped my tongue into his mouth and Mingyu’s kiss turned hungry, our lips clashing together furiously. His lips tasted like smoke and the alcohol he’s been drinking all night long; he was probably smoking a cigarette before someone alerted him of the fight Seungkwan and I were having. I felt Mingyu’s hands roaming down my back and I tried getting even closer to him than I already was. The room felt hot, and I knew it wasn’t from the heating that was still on nor from the alcohol that was in my system. Mingyu being this close to me right now was making me lost in the feel of him and I craved to get even closer, to feel his skin on mine. My hands traveled to the hem of his long-sleeved shirt and I gripped it firmly, tugging on it. Mingyu’s lips pulled back just a little as I lifted the long-sleeved shirt over his body, throwing it on the floor somewhere besides us. Mingyu’s lips pulled into a smirk as his hands travelled to my ass and I was lifted up, legs coming around his hips as he started walking us backwards. I chuckled at him and started kissing all over his face, feeling him sit us down as I cradled his lap. His hands went to my braids and he pulled the hair ties off, running his hands through my hair to undo the braids. I tilted his head back and kissed him on the lips again and Mingyu’s hands went underneath my t-shirt, feeling up on my skin as he slowly dragged them all over my back. I sighed into the kiss and my hands went to the buckles of the dungaree to push them off, to be able to take my t-shirt off as well. Mingyu’s hands helped and in no time, my t-shirt was disregarded as well. He let his hands travel all over my torso and I moaned when he groped my breasts through my bra, pressing my lips forcefully against his. Our lips moved hungrily and I dragged my nails down Mingyu’s torso, eliciting a breathy moan from him, pushing him onto his back. His body bounced as he fell back on the mattress and I didn’t waste time as I lowered my head and left kisses all over his tanned skin, soft underneath my lips. Mingyu’s eyes were screwed shut and mouth slightly opened as his chest fell and rose at a steady rhythm, his hands gripping onto my waist as he impatiently pulled me up to kiss me on the lips. His hands pushed my hips, bringing it down on his and we both moaned at the contact. My body was on fire and everywhere Mingyu touched he left goosebumps; his own heat was suffocating. His honey like scent was intoxicating as I started circling my hips against his, feeling him get harder through his jeans. One hand squeezed my ass and the other fisted my hair as he pulled my head back, pressing kisses down my neck and collarbones. With fumbling hands, I tried undoing the buttons of his jeans as Mingyu was distracted kissing me and as I pulled the zipper, my hands pressed against his hardness, and it made Mingyu moan. He looked me in the eyes and sat up abruptly, almost knocking his forehead against mine.

“Are you sure?” His voice was husky and pupils blown wide as he looked me in the eyes. I nodded and he gently pushed me off, so that we both could get rid of our pants. I quickly pushed the dungaree off and Mingyu was already by my side, pushing me down on my back as he hovered between my legs.

“Mingyu, I want this.” My voice was just as raspy as his as I reassured him that I indeed wanted this. After he opened up about his childhood I felt like he finally put his full trust in me, I finally felt like I could truly trust him. I knew he wouldn’t hurt me; I knew I meant a lot to him and I knew the feelings I felt for him he felt too just as intensely. I could see it in his eyes as his hands dragged over my legs, featherlike. I bit my lower lip as I anticipated his next move, he leaned down to press a kiss against my thigh and it made my heart jump from its place. His fingers curled around my panties and he slowly pulled them off, not breaking eye contact even for a second. Mingyu got rid of his own briefs and his hands came to rest on either side of my head. He lowered his body, so close yet not touching, and I couldn’t take it anymore. I wanted to be close to him, to feel all of him like I haven’t before.

“Mingyu.” I whispered, gripping the back of his neck, trying to get him to do something. He didn’t budge and I was getting frustrated, until he opened his mouth and spoke.

“I love you, Y/N.” My eyes widened and my heart jumped for the second time, I didn’t expect him to ever say those words to me. I figured our egos were too big to say those words to each other. I could feel the affection he had for me even if he didn’t say it. I knew I loved him, it started a while back, before there was something going on between us.

I opened my mouth to say the words back, but suddenly his skin was on mine and his lips were on mine, so filled with emotion that I was breathless. And just as I kissed him back, I felt him slowly entering me, stretching me out. My lips opened and I couldn’t help but let a moan fall from them as Mingyu pushed fully in, raising one of my knees to rest around his hips. I felt hot and full, and as I looked up at him, I could see he was just as satisfied as I was.

“I love you, Mingyu.” The words felt foreign on my lips as I breathlessly whispered them, but they were right. A smile pulled onto his lips and I tried to chuckle but his thrust knocked the wind out of me, I forgot what this felt like. But in that second I knew he was everything I’ve ever wanted.

           After everything that went down last night, I still found the energy to wake up before sunrise, brew some coffee and head to the master bedroom’s balcony to watch the sun rise in silence and peace. The other guys went to sleep not long after Mingyu and I had fallen asleep, and I wasn’t surprised that it was only me up at that hour. I walked around carefully, trying to make as little sound in the kitchen as I could as Seokmin and Soonyoung were hugging each other in their sleep on the couch in the open living room. It was a rather small couch; they should have gone to their beds. When my coffee was done, I picked up a thicker blanket that was in the kitchen and brought it over to lay it on the two sleeping men. Seokmin grumbled something as I let the blanket cover their bodies, muttering a quiet ‘thank you’. With a smile, I went back upstairs and after using the bathroom, I went onto the little balcony. The fresh sea air was refreshing and the subtle sway of the boat was calming. Seagulls flew over head and I looked up with a smile, resting comfortably in the chair. The morning breeze was cold but pleasant and I left the door to the bedroom open, it needed a little fresh air. As I looked back I could see Mingyu laying sprawled out on his stomach in the big bed, his arm laying on my pillow as he slept soundly. I smiled as it was a sight I could get used to and made a mental note to ask Mingyu to use his yacht more often. The orange hues on the sky slipped inside the room too and reflect off of Mingyu’s tan skin, giving him a soft and beautiful glow. I looked out towards the sunrise, basking in the calmness that surrounded me. I wished to be in a state like this more often. Something crashing downstairs alerted me and I stood up and walked to the railing to peek downstairs. Minghao stood frozen, with a cup of coffee in his hands, as he had just knocked over some chairs the boys probably placed next to the door of the first floors balcony. I couldn’t help but chuckle at his expression and he looked up surprised.

“Good morning!” He called quietly and I offered him a smile.

“Good morning, I didn’t think anyone else would be up.” I spoke softly, knowing he’d hear me still.

“I never miss the sunrise when we sail out, it’s too beautiful and tranquil.” Minghao’s morning voice was cute and his ruffled hair too as he spoke, I couldn’t help but chuckle.

“You can come up here, I don’t mind sharing the sunrise with you.” Minghao chuckled and pulled his robe around his torso tightly.

“Are you sure?” He asked, looking a little reluctant.

“Of course, hurry up now, it’s almost over.” I beckoned him up and Minghao nodded with an excited grin, quickly disappearing inside to come and join me.

           After everyone woke up and washed up, we ate the little leftovers there were and sailed back to the docks. It took us thirteen minutes before I set foot on the concrete, helped by Jeonghan, as Mingyu came up behind me, both of our backpacks on his broad back. I looked back at him and smiled, kissing his cheek as Seungcheol was somewhere still on the yacht. I made them clean up their mess, so that they wouldn’t need a maid to come and do it for them, and Jun was very against it but one look from Mingyu shut him up quickly. Seungkwan was surprisingly talkative this morning, even proceeded to ask me how my semester at university was and everyone laughed. Seokmin and Soonyoung pulled out their phones and thanked God they weren’t drunk enough to forget to record our fight, from two different angles. We both were embarrassed and swore never to bring it up again. As I was washing the dishes from our breakfast, Seungcheol walked up to me with a glare and I looked at him confused. Unfortunately, he heard Mingyu and I last night and he wasn’t happy that he was robbed of his sleep. I couldn’t help but laugh loudly when he very childishly complained to me about it, and Joshua walked up to us with a knowing smile before he offered to wash the rest of the dishes.

Now everyone was going towards their cars, some came together, others with their own cars. Mingyu stopped me before I could head over to Seungcheol’s car and kissed me deeply, surprising me, as Chan and Jeonghan started making gagging noises. I pulled away giggling and got my backpack from him, promising that I’d go over tomorrow for the day. Seungcheol was in a better mood than yesterday morning and looked well rested despite him complaining about Mingyu and I keeping him up. He pulled into the underground parking lot of our building and we got out quickly, headed for the elevator.

“I need a shower desperately.” He sighed as he leaned against the wall of the elevator, “I don’t like feeling the salt on my skin.”

“You should’ve showered on the yacht.” I said with a shrug as I swayed a little in the elevator.

“By the time I got to it the hot water was gone.” I chuckled and looked back at him.

“See…if you would’ve gotten up with me and Minghao to watch the sunrise, you would’ve been able to shower there.” Seungcheol shook his head with a pout and I chuckled, poking his cheek. The elevator doors opened and we both got out, going to our own apartments.

“Are you free today?” I asked as I pushed the key into the keyhole.

“If you’re in the mood to help me study, kinda.” Seungcheol said with a grimace and I nodded, remembering he failed one of his classes.

“Sure, after lunch?”

“Yeah, I want to sleep a bit more.” He muttered and we both opened our doors, I turned to wave at Seungcheol as he slammed his door shut. I chuckled and walked inside my apartment, sighing loudly as I dropped my backpack by the door. I took off my jacket and looked up, about to walk further inside when the sight in front of me made me freeze. I could see inside the living room from the hallway and what I saw left me horrified. The pillows I had on my couch were ripped up, the feathers from it laying everywhere. I dropped my jacket on the table I had by the wall and slowly took steps further inside my apartment, eyes growing wide at the sight of my kitchen. Everything was trashed, plates and cups lay on the ground shattered. There were scratches on the wall that weren’t there before. My heart was beating like crazy and I cautiously proceeded further inside, pushing the door of my bedroom open. My bedroom was a bigger mess than the kitchen. My clothes were pulled out from their places, they lay scattered around everywhere. The pillows were ripped open and the blanket was pulled off my bed, mattress cut up too. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. Who would do this? Why would someone do this? Did they break into my apartment? It can’t be, this isn’t a bad neighborhood, my neighbors would’ve heard something and told me, especially Mrs. Lim. My heart was beating fast as I walked finally into the living room, eyes falling on all the shattered picture frames that once were hung on the walls. All of my notebooks and books were ripped apart and lay on the floor. I gasped when my eyes fell on a photo of myself and Seungcheol. My face was crossed out with a big red X and my eyes were missing. My hand flew to my mouth reflexively as I felt sick. I needed to get out, Seungcheol had to see this. I can’t be in here, what if the culprit is hiding in here somewhere? I turned abruptly and was about to hurry for the front door, when a blonde woman seemed to have shown up out of nowhere. She smirked at me, looking around the apartment with a worried gaze.

“What happened here?” Sana’s high-pitched voice sounded amused. It suddenly clicked in my head, why was she here? How would she know?

“Why did you do it?” I finally found my voice, I hated how it trembled. I didn’t even know what I was supposed to think right now. I can’t even escape; she’s blocking my path. My body was tense and ready to react, it was like all of my senses heightened as my heart pumped faster.

“This?” Sana looked around, motioning with her hands, “It was supposed to be a warning.”

“For what?” I asked and she huffed, looking at me like I was a little child getting disciplined.

“For bewitching Mingyu. I don’t know how you did it, but I’m truly impressed!” She started clapping slowly and I gulped, taking a few steps back when she advanced inside the living room, “I’ve been trying so hard to get his attention, nothing worked! And then you…a broke university student who happens to be the most boring person I’ve came across, catches his attention. Don’t you think it’s unfair?!”

“You can’t force someone into liking you, Sana.” I snapped, finding the confidence I always seemed to have in situations like this one. The more she spoke, the more my blood started boiling. I forgot about the initial fear I felt, all I wanted was to choke her, she deserved it.

“You know, everything was going just fine, until you came along.” Her voice was venomous as she tried getting closer to me, but I kept my distance. I didn’t glance towards the exit, trying not to remind her that if we switched places, I’d very easily be able to make a run for it. So instead, I played it smart. I walked to the right so that she’d try and come by my left side, switching our places.  

“Maybe to you everything was going just fine,” I mocked her with a disgusted face, Sana didn’t appreciate it, “But I’ve only heard shit about you. Get out of your head, Sana, Mingyu never liked you. And he’ll never like you.”

Sana’s jaw clenched and she started laughing crazily, her eyes narrowed as she watched me, “And you still think he’ll keep you around forever? That you’ll be his?”

“I’m no one’s,” I snapped, palms turning into fists, “and how my relationship goes with Mingyu is none of your business. Now that you’re here, with your special little warning, you’ve got me wondering…did Momo go crazy because of Mingyu? Or you…”

Sana’s eyes widened and I chuckled, backing towards the hallway slowly, “Yeah, I know everything Sana. If you trashing my apartment was supposed to be a warning, why are you still here? It’s a bit now embarrassing that I’ll have to tell your colleagues what a psycho their boss is.”

Sana chuckled in a very hysterical way and looked back at me with her eyes blazing from fury, maybe I shouldn’t have mocked her and instead should have taken off a long time ago, “I had a change of mind in the middle of trashing your apartment. And I’m really glad I decided to stay for a little extra surprise…because…today is the day you take your last breath, Y/N.”

My heart jumped into my throat and as I turned and took off towards the front door, Sana jumped over my coffee table and caught up with me, grabbing onto my hair. I exclaimed in pain as she hauled me back roughly and pushed me into the wall. She was holding onto my hair tightly, a lot tighter than Seungkwan was, I could feel her ripping the strands out. My eyes filled with tears from the pain and I placed my hands quickly against the wall when I felt Sana pulling my head back to smash it against the wall. My hands took the hit and Sana hissed; lips pressed against my ear.

“Maybe you shouldn’t have mocked me.” Her voice was low and I yelped when she yanked me backwards. Taking the chance, I pushed my body into hers and with all the force I had, I ran us backwards, knocking Sana into the wall this time. She didn’t let go of my hair still and I stomped on her foot, putting all of my weight into my right leg, and she cried out in pain.

“Let go, you bitch!” I exclaimed as I elbowed her hard in the stomach and she finally released my hair, doubling over. She was quick to recover and before I could run to the front door, which wasn’t far at all, she had me turned around by my arm and next thing I knew a punch was landed on my jaw. It threw me off balance and I fell against the wall, groaning loudly as an excruciating pain traveled all over my jaw. I’ve never felt anything like it before, I could’ve cried right there and then. I haven’t recovered from the blow yet when Sana had my hair in her fist again, keeping me standing upright. She was so much shorter, but her power was immense. She punched me in the stomach and it knocked all the air out of my lungs, pain traveling all over my torso. I looked at her through teary eyes and mustered up all the power I had in me and pushed her back by the shoulders, her fist yanked on my hair but it let go as she was taken by surprise. She stumbled back and I finally turned and started running, when the click of a gun made me freeze. My body ran cold, it felt like my heart stopped beating and my blood froze over. My lower lips trembled as I raised my arms to let her know that I wouldn’t do anything. I slowly turned around, my jaw and stomach throbbing in pain, as I came face to face with a smirking Sana.

“You know how to fight,” She said with a chuckle, holding the gun tightly, “And you’re pretty good too.”

I just gulped, unable to take my eyes off the gun. So, after all, I wouldn’t die at the hands of Kim Mingyu. An obsessed woman was the one to end my life. I wondered what his reaction would’ve been after the night we shared. After I told him I loved him. Would he avenge my death? Would he destroy everything and everyone who came onto his path? Would Seungcheol miss me very much? Would he be able to recover? Find a true friend in someone else? What about Vernon? He’d lose someone once again he cared about; he’d be destroyed. My parents…my poor parents who didn’t deserve to bury their only daughter. They’d be forever tainted; I know they would never recover from losing me.

“Look at you…” Sana scoffed and I looked at her, biting my lower lip, “You’re seriously crying.”

I didn’t realize I started crying. She pushed the safety off her gun and a voice, so loud I jumped, shouted at me to just “MOVE”. I didn’t think twice, I ducked and ran towards Sana like you see the rugby players do, and I heard the gun going off, but I didn’t care. I didn’t know if it hit me or not, my body, which felt sore a second ago, felt like it just got a refreshing massage. I wasn’t in pain anymore; all I could hear was my loud heart going crazy. There were two screams and my arms latched onto Sana’s torso tightly as I ran into her body, knocking us down onto the floor. She was breathing hard and her eyes rolled to the back of her head for a second from the impact her body went through, and I looked at her with so much anger that her body started trembling.

“Maybe you shouldn’t have touched me.” I mocked, using her own words against her, as I raised my fist and crashed into the side of her face, her resisting body going limp under me. I was breathing hard as I shook her body, seeing if she was still conscious. When I was sure she wasn’t, I scrambled away from her and gripped onto my hair, realizing I was shaking very hard. I covered my ears when I heard a door being kicked open and curled up into a ball, trying to hide from whoever came to get me. Sana almost killed me. I screamed when someone touched me and before I could fight the person, my cheeks were gripped tightly and moved away from my knees. The touch was warm and the hand was big against my cheeks, and I wouldn’t stop trembling.

“Please,” The panicked whisper hit me like bricks and my eyes flew open, “Y/N, oh my God.”

My arms flew around Seungcheol as I clung onto him like a koala, clutching his shirt into my hands so tightly I almost ripped the fabric. His arms were tight around me and he rocked us back and forth, caressing the back of my head as he shooshed me like I was a baby. It was strangely calming, but I couldn’t get myself to let go of him. Something wet dropped onto my cheek and I thought I was crying again, but it was Seungcheol’s wet hair. I realized his shirt was a little wet too, he must have ran here straight when the gun went off.

“Y/N,” He whispered into my ear and I nodded, unable to speak, “You have to call Mingyu.”

I nodded again and let Seungcheol helped me off the ground, I still didn’t pull out of his embrace, “I need to bring over something, you have to let me go—”

“Don’t leave me alone with her!” I said panicking and Seungcheol patted my head again.

“It’ll take five second, I promise.” Seungcheol’s tone was reassuring but I was reluctant still, “When did I not keep my promise?”

I sucked in a shaky breath and finally detached myself from my best friend, hands shaking once again. His expression was the exact opposite of his tone, when I looked at him, my throat closed in on me. His expression was so dark it almost made me cry again, but before we could say anything else, he was out of the door. I glanced at Sana and ran to my jacket, keeping my eyes on her as I fumbled around for my phone. When I finally had it in my hands, I unlocked it and dialed Mingyu’s number. I pressed myself against the wall and scooted to the front door, ready to flee if Sana happened to wake up. I didn’t know how strong my punch was.

“Sugar—”

“Sana tried to kill me.” It came out as a whimper and there was dead silence on the other line, “She just—she was in my apartment—Seungcheol told me to call you.”

My heart was beating fast and the front door knocked into my shoulder as Seungcheol came rushing in, I moved away to let him in. There was still silence on the other end and suddenly the call ended. I looked at my phone confused and remained where I was, watching Seungcheol press duct tape onto Sana’s lips and then he hauled her up and dragged a chair into the middle of my living room before sitting her on it. He took the ropes he brought and tied her tightly against the chair, pulling on it to make sure she wouldn’t be able to undo it. He looked around and when his eyes fell on the gun he went and took it, taking the ammunition out before smashing it against the floor angrily.

“Seungcheol,” I whispered, lips trembling.

“I can’t believe this bitch tried to—to kill you.” A vein was popping in his neck and I gazed at him sadly, “I should’ve killed her the second I found her swooping around our things years ago. I just—did she hurt you?”

I shook my head and took two steps towards him, still keeping my distance from Sana, “No, the bullet didn’t hit me—I think. I’d feel that—right?”

“You would,” Seungcheol sighed, running his hands through his wet black hair, “What did Mingyu say?”

“Nothing.” I whispered, biting my lower lip anxiously.

“Oh, fuck.” Seungcheol muttered to himself and before I could ask what that meant, Mingyu and Vernon came storming inside my apartment. I jumped and pressed myself up against the wall, my heart thumping from the sudden actions of the two new comers. Vernon’s eyes were fixed on Sana and he started looking around my apartment, Mingyu, however was only looking at me. We looked at each other and in a split second I was in his arms, breathing in his honey and smoke like scent, telling myself that I was safe now. He was here, Sana wouldn’t hurt me anymore. Mingyu didn’t react to my touch, he pushed me back a little, looking down at my face.

“What did she do to you?” The Mingyu from yesterday was gone; the man in front of me, was the man who held a gun to my head. His voice ice and expression cold as he waited patiently for my answer.

“Punched me twice and—tried to shoot me.” I shuddered at the words and Mingyu looked at Vernon, giving him a nod. I looked at Vernon alarmed when he went inside my kitchen and returned with a glass of water, apparently Sana didn’t break everything.

“What are you going to do?” I whispered to Mingyu as Vernon walked to Sana. Mingyu looked down at me and carefully pushed me away.

“Don’t move from here.” Is all he said and I heard water splashing, so I turned and saw Sana’s eyes wide open. She looked around franticly and panicked, but when her eyes fell on Mingyu she seemed to relax a little bit. I glared at her as I remained as far away as I could from her, Vernon abandoning the glass on the coffee table as he came to stand next to me. Seungcheol was leaning against the entrance of the living room as he watched Sana with a glare. Mingyu walked slowly, looking around my apartment, taking everything in. His eyes fell on Sana and he nodded at Seungcheol, who ripped the duct tape from her mouth. Vernon placed his arm around my shoulders and pulled me into his side, offering me a little comfort. I sighed and I thanked him quietly, needing the little support he could offer me. He looked just as emotionless as Mingyu and Seungcheol, but his eyes were full of worry as we shared a glance, and his thumb kept rubbing my shoulder in a calming motion, we both needed it.

“Mingyu.” Sana’s voice was whiney and tears gathered in her eyes. Mingyu interlaced his fingers in front of himself and sighed loudly, pursing his lips.

“Explain yourself.” His voice was emotionless as he looked everywhere but at Sana.

“I—I—I—” Sana seemed to be at a loss of words as she looked panicked around, her eyes falling on me and she frowned. Her body was slightly trembling and I couldn’t help but scowl at her.

“Relax, my dear,” My body tensed upon hearing Mingyu’s words and the warmness in his tone, and I twitched when he rubbed Sana’s cheek, “I asked you something simple. All you have to do is be honest with me.”

Vernon was aware of my reaction and he squeezed me, looking at me, “He knows what he’s doing, don’t get mad.”

“Touching her and being nice to her when she tried to kill me?” I snapped at Vernon quietly, but Seungcheol glanced at us, and I realized I wasn’t very quiet. Sana’s lips pulled into a smirk for a split second before she nodded at Mingyu.

“Okay, I—I will, but…will you hurt me?” She asked, faking the fear in her voice.

“Depends on if you tell me the truth or not.” Mingyu said casually as he shrugged and then took a seat on my sofa. Vernon continued rubbing my shoulder with his thumb and I decided to remain calm and silent, if whatever Mingyu was doing will make Sana talk, I won’t fuck it up.

“Well, I just—couldn’t stand seeing you with Y/N, Mingyu. Not when I worked so hard to be with you and well—you did so much for Momo, I wanted to show you my gratitude, I really did! And things were going amazing between us but—that bitch showed up and she came between us. I didn’t want to do this, Mingyu, I swear. I just wanted to scare her a bit, make her run away on her own, but then I just—I found your clothes in her wardrobe and her bathroom smelled like your cologne, I just—I lost control! I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to do what I did, I just wanted to scare her—”

“Did you scare her?” Mingyu raised his eyebrows nonchalantly and my pulse was raising by every minute.

“I did!” Sana chuckled like a mad woman and looked me in the eyes, “She even cried!”

My jaw clenched and if it wasn’t for Vernon, I would’ve lunged at her and choked her.

“How did you make her cry?” Mingyu pressed on and I tried to steady my breathing.

“I pointed my gun at her. I pulled the trigger but the bitch dodged it last minute. What a pity, I would’ve hit her straight in her heart—” Mingyu’s sudden movement made Sana flinch and I looked at him as he placed his left hand in the pocket of his coat, coming to stand next to Seungcheol.

“And this is the truth, yes?” Mingyu raised his eyebrows at Sana and she nodded at him proudly. Mingyu sighed deeply and looked at Seungcheol, shaking his head at him. Seungcheol didn’t react, he just reached for his phone and started typing on it. Sana looked between the two with a smile and Vernon sighed beside me, I looked at him confused.

“What’s happening—”

“You see, my dear,” Mingyu interrupted Sana’s frantic question, “thing is…you touched something that’s mine. You hurt her, Sana, you hurt Y/N. And I appreciate your honesty, but your actions can’t be forgiven. No one touches Y/N, not even me, do you hear me?”

“I—I’m so sorry—”

“Shut up!” Mingyu snapped, his expression falling as his anger came ripping through him, “You tried to kill Y/N, Sana, are you out of your fucking mind?! I guess you are, Seungcheol was right…Momo was right. You know little Kim Doyoung?”

“He’s my subordinate—”

“Exactly!” Mingyu laughed, leaning down to be eye level with Sana, “And if you’re gone…he takes your place. Sana, I’m sorry to tell you, but you failed to be of our help…unlike little Doyoung, he’s been a very important asset to your investigation but also an amazing help for me.”

“What—I don’t understand—” But I did, everything Mingyu was saying made sense. I tensed up and looked at both Vernon and Seungcheol, but they looked unphased, they knew what was coming.

“Mingyu, please, you don’t have to—” I tried to reason with him.

“She almost killed you.” He snapped, drawing his gun out of his pocket. My heart was thumping quickly in my chest and Vernon’s hold tightened on me as Seungcheol turned to look our way.

“Look away, Y/N.” My eyes widened and as a scream left Sana’s mouth, the gun went off. I couldn’t see it because Mingyu’s body blocked the view and Seungcheol walked up in front of me, holding my head to be only able to look at him. A shaky breath left my lips as Vernon’s warm embrace left me and I found myself shaking again. Seungcheol kissed my forehead and I closed my eyes, trying to ignore the shuffling coming from my living room. There was a hard thud and I flinched, holding onto Seungcheol’s wrist.

“It’s over.” Mingyu’s sudden voice in my ear made me tense up and Seungcheol’s hands went away as Mingyu pulled me into him this time, burying my head in his chest. I heard the two men pass by us and then it was suddenly silent in my apartment. My arms went around Mingyu’s torso as I held onto him tightly, feeling tears in my eyes once again. He held me tightly and kissed my head, making me sigh.

“You’re moving in with me.” He muttered and I pulled back to look at him, “Something like this will never happen again.”

I nodded wordlessly and Mingyu looked behind him, “My neighbors…”

“Will be taken care of—”

“Don’t kill them!” I quickly exclaimed and Mingyu chuckled, cupping my cheek.

“Of course not, sugar, I don’t kill innocent people.” I gulped and looked him in the eyes, still trying to wrap my mind around the fact that he killed Sana just a few minutes ago.

“I’ll move in with you.” I whispered and leaned up to press a kiss against his lips, trying to calm my erratic heartbeat. The man I was in love with was a criminal, he just killed a woman before my eyes…a woman that tried to kill me first. Was this the life I’d live if I remained by his side? As I looked up at Mingyu, I felt all emotions mix together. Love, happiness, anxiety, fear. Yet, I felt safe in his arms, I knew he’d do anything for me. He might not be the best person, but I couldn’t help love him more. The other half of me I always craved and wanted was finally in front of me. A smile pulled onto Mingyu’s lips and he pressed a kiss against my forehead, and I knew.

I knew I’d spend the rest of my life with him.

I was in love with Kim Mingyu, and nothing could scare me away anymore.

        A/N: Thank you so much everyone who’s shown support for this mini series! It’s probably the first time I’ve been shown this much love every time I posted a new part, and you made it so enjoyable for me to write. I was legit every single time excited to post it, because I wanted to see your reactions. Thank you very much again for being interested in this mini series and sending me your thoughts, I appreciate them all! I’m a little sad that this is over, but I’m so excited about Streets, that I can’t be very sad haha. Besides, that Wonwoo oneshot in this universe is still happening, give me two weeks! :) I wish you all a pleasant evening/day and I hope I’ll see you showing up for my other stories as well <3

[luimnigh]

I posted 9,852 times in 2021

2570 posts created (26%)

7282 posts reblogged (74%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 2.8 posts.

I added 10,490 tags in 2021

#rwby - 2910 posts

#rwby8 - 1676 posts

#rwby spoilers - 1463 posts

#rwby8 spoilers - 1353 posts

#asks - 927 posts

#anonymous - 736 posts

#mass effect - 473 posts

#uncaptioned - 443 posts

#luimnigh plays mass effect - 285 posts

#cinder fall - 224 posts

Longest Tag: 140 characters

#people would say it's impossible to make an animated series in the backroom of an internet company with a dozen crew and basically no budget

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

I will always love the fact that so many horror movie monsters are pursuit predators. Relentless trackers that will follow you to the ends of the Earth, maybe slower but never stopping, and usually heavily resistant to any damage you throw it's way.

Because that's how humans hunt too.

One of the scariest things we can come up with is "what if our hyper-specialized hunting strategy, but better than us".

3274 notes • Posted 2021-05-05 21:52:57 GMT

#4

See, I’m actually satisfied with what happened with Penny here, because Penny did it herself. 

Ambrosius had no hand in creating Penny’s new body. He simply removed the old, and let Penny’s soul stand on it’s own. 

And thus Penny, the real girl, created herself in her own image using the power given to her by Fria, the Blue Fairy. 

And we know this, because Ambrosius’ creations are destroyed when he makes a new one. The robot body crumbled away. 

But Penny remained. 

The Maiden of Creation created herself. 

3375 notes • Posted 2021-03-13 16:57:43 GMT

#3

The popular idea of Jonathan Swift's A Modest Proposal is just ever so slightly incorrect, but the distinction makes a difference in my opinion.

The way people usually present it is that the Proposal is "the hungry should eat their children", and that's not what Swift proposes at all.

What he instead proposes is that the poor should sell their children to the rich, and that the rich should eat the poor children, and the proceeds would lift the poor out of poverty.

The popular idea misses the theme of "rich people are bastards and only help the less fortunate if there's something in it for them" and the comparison between the proposal and the reality of child labour in the leadup to the Industrial Revolution.

6088 notes • Posted 2021-08-16 18:38:49 GMT

#2

...I'm seeing a lot of people saying that only Voice Actors should do Voice Acting and that is absolutely missing the point entirely.

Like aside from the fact that Voice Acting is acting, it's not about putting on voices, it's about performance; that sort of typecasting does nothing to help voice actors. Most voice actors do also take on live-action roles too.

Voice acting has unique challenges that a lot of film actors underestimate, but the same is true of the differences between stage acting and film acting. The challenges can be overcome, and many actors easily switch between the different styles.

The problem with the casting we're seeing with Mario is twofold.

The first is that the original/current voice actors have been pushed put the roles they've spent years in, that they're iconic in, in favour of new actors in this high-profile adaptation. And while the games will go back to Charles Martinet and Jennifer Hale (yes, Commander Shepard is Princess Peach), this takes the opportunity away from them of playing their characters on a much bigger stage.

The second is more general to theatrical animation: it's stunt casting, plain and simple. They're not casting who's best for the role, they're casting actors specifically to make headlines and draw attention.

Now, you can do stunt casting well, I don't think anyone begrudges Robin Williams for Aladdin, but the problem is when you have your entire cast be stunt casting, the end product can end up lesser for it and it pushes out smaller-name actors and voice actors who could have done the role just as well.

EDIT: Apologies, Samantha Kelly is the voice of Princess Peach. I confused Jennifer Hale and Jen Taylor, voice of Cortana in Halo, who voiced Peach from 2000-2007. 

7857 notes • Posted 2021-09-24 15:16:43 GMT

#1

...that is the strangest cast list for a Mario movie anyone could dream of.

17183 notes • Posted 2021-09-23 22:43:22 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[larryfanficwriter98]

Chapter Two

(Just an idea of the gifts I pictured)

Louis texts

Harry texts

Harry woke up on the tour bus feeling it move underneath him. He groaned burying his face in the pillows for a few minutes. The tour bus was the same as any other tour bus except the backroom was converted into a bedroom a few years back. The bunks were for his band and the bedroom was his. The original story when it got out was that it was for Harry's many women companions no matter how many times Harry denied it. Rolling over he grabbed his phone and saw he had a new message in the Anonymous app. He unlocked his phone and went to the app and saw it was from Louis.

Why volcano boarding?

Harry's lips twitched before he typed a reply.

Volcano ash stains are impossible to get out.

Harry watched the screen for a minute before locking the phone and rolling out of bed. He headed to the bathroom to shower and to get dressed for a day of traveling. When his phone went off he grabbed it and checked the message.

Why do it? Lost a bet didn't you?

No.

Maybe.

Okay so yes, but it looked like fun.

And paragliding?

Lost a bet.

Skydiving?

Lost a bet.

Bungee jump?

Got dared.

Double or triple?

...triple.

Brutal mates

Tell me about it. They didn't even do it with me!

Horrible mates, you've got. What about mountain climbing?

Unfortunately, that was my fault.

Figured why not...I now know why not.

Yeah? What's the biggest reason?

I'm scared of heights.

The harness digs into your balls.

Pretty sure I'm sterile now.

So what brought you to Anonymous?

An entire bottle of Wine.

I don't have many friends and haven't been able to properly date, and I'm currently traveling right now. I'll be back in England in six months and I don't know I guess I am a hopeless romantic who thought this was a good idea after a bottle of wine.

Yeah? Where are you traveling?

Different locations. Currently in Germany heading to Hamburg.

"Hey, Tommo your cereal is getting soggy." Louis jumped and looked away from his phone to look at Liam.

"What?"

"Your cereal. It'll get soggy."

"Oh. Right." Louis turned away and went back to texting Harold back but he made sure to shove a spoonful of coco pops into his mouth.

"Who are you talking to? New guy?" Louis hummed distractedly, "can I have some if your coco pops?" Louis hummed again as he slid his thumb over the keys before he realized what Liam just asked.

"What? No!" Louis looked to Liam, but it was too late as Liam was smirking and eating a spoonful of coco pops.

"Did hell freeze over or do we have a hidden box if coco pops?" Zayn asked walking into the kitchen

"Louis has a boy he's distracted by and I took advantage." Liam said feeding his fiance a spoonful of the cereal.

"Distracted enough to let you have coco pops? That's a good sign. Who is he?"

"No one. I'm hiding my coco pops again." Louis grabbed the box and held it to his chest then he looked at his phone again laughing at Harold's message.

"I have to head into work, but I'll see you, lads, later." Louis set his coco pops box down on the island and headed to the door slipping his Van's on grabbing his keys while replying to Harry.

Have to head into work. Keep me updated on that snack thief and I'll text when I can.

I'll send hourly updates.

***

Messaging Louis became one of his favorite things to do, he was often distracted by the sound of his phone going off. 8 out of 10 times it was Louis and the 2% it wasn't always made his excitement go down even if just for a moment. He hasn't told Louis he was Demisexual or a virgin yet, but not because he was scared he'd leave the conversation, but because it has never been brought up before. Truly.

He would send pictures of beautiful views to Louis and famous landmarks and Louis would return the favor with the picture of the Manchester sky. Either it is raining or sunny, Louis always had a sarcastic message to go with it. It was almost an unspoken agreement to not send selfies to one another. He doesn't know how it became a thing, but it was.

Louis would often send pictures of what he was doing like if he was doing the dishes or if he was at work then it was of the kids he watched at the daycare. The video game controller if he was playing with his housemates, or if they ordered pizza he'd send him a picture of a slice and ask if Harry wanted Louis to save him some. Harry would do the same and send him pictures of his own game he was playing with his mates on the tour bus, he'd send him a picture of his meals at restaurants. If he was playing the guitar he'd send him a picture of his Gibson.

For some reason it worked for them, it satisfied them in a way. Harry has been debating whether or not to give Louis his actual phone number so they didn't have to rely on the app, but he just couldn't bring himself to do it for some reason. He did however find himself buying Louis things from the local shops and gift shops. When his backroom got a bit too crowded in Japan, and because he was feeling bad about the time difference he went to the post office and got a box then paid for the fastest shipping to Manchester after buying a postal box for Louis Tomlinson. The security question was What is the color of Harold's Gibson guitar?

Louis arrived at the postal office still confused as to why Harry had asked him to get his mail for him. It took a few days for Harry to convince him, but eventually, he figured it couldn't hurt and he would just drop it off at the listed address anyway. He really liked Harry. He was funny and Louis had a distinct impression that he was extremely hot and he couldn't wait for them to share selfies. He couldn't wait to share phone numbers and calls and maybe even facetime.

"Name please?" The desk worker asked

"Louis Tomlinson. I'm picking up." Louis told the man who nodded and typed something into his computer

"There is a security question. What is the color of Harold's Gibson?" The man was just as confused as Louis had been at first until he heard the question

"It's a dark blue with a hummingbird." Louis told him

"He just said blue so here is the key."

"Thank you." Louis headed to the number on the key ring tag finding one of the larger boxes. He had half a mind to take back his agreement, but headed to the box and unlocked it. Sure enough, there sat a 20x20x20 box, but instead of Harry's name, it was actually addressed to Louis Tomlinson. He turned the box to read the label and his jaw dropped in shock when he realized Harry had sent it from Japan.

"That lying asshole." Louis said even though he was grinning and was kind of pleased in a way that Harry was so thoughtful. They hadn't talked about being exclusive to one another, but neither of them has talked to anyone else and they told the other one that. Louis had a feeling that Harry wasn't the type to just message five guys and Louis, after a week of talking to Harry stopped replying to the others. He headed to the desk with the box in his arms to return the key, but the man shook his head.

"It’s under a six-month rental. The key is for you to keep trying not to lose it." Louis nodded trying not to get too pleased that Harry was planning on sending him more things. He packed the box on his passenger seat then headed home eager to open his gift. When he got to the house he walked inside with the help of his ass and hips.

"Why do you have a box?" Liam asked curiously

"Because I do." Louis said as he set the box on the coffee table and opened his phone taking a picture of it and sending it to Harry. It was 9am in Manchester so in Japan, it was 5pm so Harry should be awake for another few hours. Some days he was busy though and hardly able to message which Louis understood if he was on a worldwide vacation. Louis wouldn't want to chat all that much either.

"Japan? From Harold?"

"Yeah, the little lying jerk." Louis locked his phone and tossed it to the couch before heading to the kitchen to grab a knife.

"Didn't he just arrive there though?"

"Yeah, about three days ago why?"

"You realize how much international shipping is? How much fast international shipping cost?" Louis paused and looked at Liam, "he must be well off."

"I bet it's daddy's credit card." Zayn said as he sat on the couch with Niall

"There's nothing wrong with having well off parents. Leave him alone. I actually like this one."

"Sorry Lou... you're right now open the box so we can see what he thought ya. Bet the insides are not as pricey as the shipping." Louis rolled his eyes at the gentle teasing before he cut the tape.

He opened the flaps and saw an envelope on top of the tissue paper that was hiding the contents of the box. Louis grabbed the envelope and opened it, pulling out a few pieces of paper that were folded together. Unfolding the letter he saw a messy, but somehow neat handwriting on the pages.

Louis,

I am so glad that my wine drunk mind led me through this really weird path of meeting you. You have brought a lot of joy in my life that I hadn’t completely realized I was missing. My friends and my family are all talking about how much I have changed since talking to you. You are hilarious, sarcastic, caring, and always seem to be one step ahead of me.

I'm sure the worker told you the box will be open for six months, I plan on sending a lot of things to you along my travels as long as we keep talking. I know we have exactly talked about exclusiveness and where this is heading despite both of us looking for settling down soon. I realize my situation makes it hard to meet and understand each other and I want you to understand more and more as I begin to trust you.

I hope you understand when I say I would like this to be between us. You see I am frequently in the public eye. Magazines, websites, articles, you name it. It's always been hard to meet people who are genuinely interested in me as a person either being friends or more. I don't have many close friends who I completely trust, I have a few and they're all very trustworthy, but a lot of people I have thought were my friends have used me in some way either for money or publicity.

I do not however believe you would do such a thing which is why I am telling you this. As much as I would like to completely trust you with everything, I can not and for that, I am truly sorry. I hope you understand because talking to you has been amazing and the highlight of this trip. Before I am home you will know the complete truth and hopefully, you will understand what being with me would entail in your normal lives.

Anyway, I bought you some things I have found around the local shops and gift shops. Some are cheesy crap that I thought was a good laugh while others were thought out and meaningful. I hope.

Yours,

Harold

Louis was only a tad confused, but after a second read through it made more sense. Louis folded the letter up and slipped it into the envelope ignoring the looks he was receiving before he pulled back the tissue paper. Everything was neatly and carefully wrapped in bubble wrapping even what Louis thought was a stuffed teddy which was ridiculous but cute in a way. He pulled the first item out and undone the bubble wrap revealing a Teddy bear as he thought with the German flag on the white shirt. Louis grinned as he fixed the shirt.

"Wow, a five-pound teddy. Impressive." Niall said

"Oh stop there's more in here he said there's a mix of cheesy cliche things and meaningful things. I find it cute."

And Louis meant that as he set the Teddy on the couch to grab the next Teddy. All the teddys were on top of the other items so he went through Poland, Denmark, Norway, Sweden, Finland, Japan, and Russia teddy bears. All the same bear and after Louis had lined them up he took a picture of them and sent them to Harold.

"I already don't like you two together." Zayn said

"Oh let Louis get spoiled. It's cute." Liam said hitting his fiance, "what else did he get you? T-shirts?" Louis glared at him as he debated which item to grab next.

There were a few boxes that had the German flag sticker on the bubble wrap so he grabbed those. He knew when they started talking Harry was almost leaving Germany so he was a little surprised Harry bought something from the country. What he unwrapped was boxes of German chocolate and German teas. Then there were boxes of natural wooden toys safe for children and Louis grinned knowing those were for the daycare that Louis had told Harry he bought toys for regularly. He honestly couldn't wait to open those boxes with the kids and test them out so he set those off to the side making a new pile.

He then moved on to Denmark flag items which were a simple black striped vase with a note that said ''Kähler Ceramics-For Your Future Flowers''. Following the vase was a Nisse souvenir, a little mermaid figurine, Danish chocolates of course, and Danish knitted sweaters just big enough for him to snuggle into which he had told Harry he liked to do often on cold winter days.

Moving onto Norway there were more sweaters which Louis was not complaining about one bit. They were all warm and big and he knew he'd wear them often. There were some Norwegian books printed in English that fit what he liked to read. Then there was of course the Norwegian chocolate.

After Norway was Russia and the first thing Louis pulled out was a Matryoshka doll, a few beautiful Russian lacquer boxes, a few birch bark crafts, and a lot of Russian sweets and chocolate. There was a large item that had the Russian flag sticker, but Louis could get to it yet so he moved on to Japan.

The Japanese souvenirs and gifts were a beautiful set of chopsticks that looked more for display than actual eating, a few Kendama toys, a few Koma toys, a Maneki Neko, a Japanese folding fan, a few different Daruma dolls, a Wagasa, and last some sweats and chocolate.

Finally able to get the last item out which was the main reason the box had to be so big. Multiple sticky notes were saying to grab it from the bottom and to be GENTLE. Louis was grinning as he bent over and grabbed the little edges that had arrows pointing to them in sticky notes.

"Need help?" Niall asked

"He says to be gentle not that it's breakable so hopefully not." Louis very carefully pulled out the gift. Niall moved the box away letting Louis set it on the coffee table.

He gently began unwrapping the smallest piece revealing a beautiful teapot and immediately he knew. He knew exactly what this was and he was going to kill him, he was going to murder Harold as he unwrapped the matching tray moving on to what he now knew to be a Samovar.

When it was revealed it was gorgeous and Louis didn't know if he wanted to cry or scream or faint. He immediately grabbed the Samovar and headed into the kitchen pouring water into the kettle and putting tea leaves into the teapot. He then plugged the Samovar into the outlet and turned it to its highest setting letting the water boil. Once that was down he poured the boiling water into the teapot and then the tea into a mug all in the manner of 12 minutes. Louis moaned shamelessly after the first sip of hot strong tea.

"So..it makes tea?" Niall asked

"It keeps water simmering so I never run out of hot water for my tea. I've been wanting one for years, but they cost hundreds of- oh that bastard."

"LOUIS HAS A RICH BOYFRIEND!" Liam shouted teasingly, making Louis glare at him as he grabbed his phone off the couch seeing Harry had messaged him back after he sent him the two photos.

Thought they were cute and hoped you'd like the cheesiness of it.

We need to talk about that last gift Harold.

No, we don't.

Yes, we do.

Nope.

Yes.

No. Absolutely not. Not talking about it...do you like it?

It's beautiful and lovely and I've already made some tea.

Good. So there's nothing to talk about then.

No more gifts!

😳😳😟😟😦😦🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺😨😨😰😰😥😥😢😢😭😭😭

Did you just send emojis explaining your sadness over my text?!?

Yes. I'm sending more for December. Your birthday is Christmas Eve Louis, I can't ignore that!

Well, how am I supposed to send you gifts if you're traveling?

Easily. You don't. 😁😁

😐🤨

😇😇

🤨🤨

(The story gets better after this chapter I promise.)

[chasholidays]

Remember that dream I had where Bellamy was some kind of wardrobe gremlin and Clarke became owner of his wardrobe and took such good care of it he fell in love with her? THAT. I WANT THAT. (I still have the pictures of the conversation saved somewhere if you need a reminder)

Bellamy discovers that Mr. Wallace has died when he leaves his wardrobe at midnight and sets off an alarm.

Obviously, he doesn’t immediately understand that Mr. Wallace has died, just that the wardrobe has moved and his routine will need to change. He slips into the shadows of the nether realm as the alarms continue to blare, studying the room. At first, it feels a great deal like Mr. Wallace’s house, musty and full of odd, old things, but the layout is different, and once his eyes adjust to looking at the human realm through the veil, it snaps into place: an antique store.

As new places to live go, it’s not particularly convenient, especially if they have motion-sensor alarms. Bellamy’s family had a good thing going with the Wallaces, whether the Wallaces knew it or not. Dante had taken pride in his old house full of peculiar items, had loved to brag that it was connected to the spirit world. Bellamy had done his part by rattling doors, moving objects from within the faerie realm, and generally being an odd spiritual presence, and, in return, Mr. Wallace had (whether he knew it or not) kept the Blake’s wardrobe, which really was the gateway to another world.

Bellamy had known the arrangement wouldn’t last forever. Dante might have liked his haunted house, but his son Cage never had, and Bellamy hadn’t expected him to maintain the property as his father would have wanted. So something must have happened to the old man, and his son sold all of his belongings.

It’s not really good for Bellamy, broadly speaking. Once he’s in the human realm, he can leave easily enough, slipping through any number of convenient pockets of shadow, but to get to the human realm, he has to go through the portal in the wardrobe, which apparently now leads to motion-sensor alarms.

So that’s annoying.

The next night, he doesn’t actually leave the wardrobe before shifting to the nether realm, and from there he finds and disconnects the alarm, goes back to the wardrobe, and comes out into the human realm again. It’s more steps than he’d like to take, but he can at least grab one of the antique store’s business cards, figure out where he is–not far from the old Wallace house, at least–and then get out and make it to his favorite 24-hour cafe with free wifi so he can find out what happened to Dante and figure out where to go from here.

The thing is, Bellamy doesn’t have to come to the human realm. He could just hang out in faerie all the time, like most gremlins do. Hauntings are considered old-fashioned these days, and dangerous on top of that, as humanity has gotten less superstitious and more skeptical. Dante brought in so-called ghost hunters on several occasions to prove that something supernatural was going on, but Bellamy didn’t have much trouble fucking with them without any risk to himself. He’d even watched a couple of the episodes that resulted from the visits; they came out pretty well, if he does say so himself. It was fun.

So he’d like to keep coming back, living his odd, inter-realm life, but the antiques store isn’t really the place for that. He can trip their alarms and watch the ensuing chaos and confusion from the nether shadows, but all anyone really seems to think is that some asshole kids are fucking with the antique store. Which, Bellamy has to admit, is a pretty solid hypothesis. Definitely more plausible than wardrobe gremlins. But it’s not very satisfying, as hauntings go.

Leaving to go do other human stuff is possible, but a definitely pain, so he doesn’t go to the human realm very often over the next few weeks, just popping in every other day or so to check that nothing has changed, causing a little chaos from the shadows and checking his email to see if Netflix has added anything interesting he should be streaming.

The whole thing feels like a transitional phase, so when, about four months after Mr. Wallace’s death, Bellamy slides out of the wardrobe and into the nether realm to turn off the alarms and finds there’s nothing to turn off, it feels like the other shoe dropping. His life settling into its new place.

He slips into the human realm to take a look around, examining the new room with interest. It’s smaller than any of the others he’s been in and sparser, probably some kind of storage room. There’s an easel with a half-finished painting on it in one corner, but aside from that it’s all furniture, some of it covered it in white drop cloths, some of it not, all of it old and more than a little beaten up. As much as it pains him to admit it, his own wardrobe fits right in, and he can’t help but worry this is where antiques no one wants to buy go to die.

Then he hears noise from outside the slightly open door, notices light down the hallway.

He checks his phone, functional now that he’s in the human realm, to make sure it really is midnight. Obviously humans do stay up this late, are awake at all hours of the day, from what he can tell, but he’s always been with people who are in bed early.

He slides into the shadows of the wardrobe’s new home, finds it’s not some backroom of the store as he assumed, but instead a living space. An apartment, probably, small and a little disorderly. The noise and light are coming from the living room, where a blonde girl is stretched out on a couch, playing video games in a tank top and pajama pants.

Bellamy has met plenty of humans, even humans around his own age, but the sight of her is still a shock. Between Mr. Wallace and the antique-store owner, he didn’t really think humans under the age of fifty had any interest in his wardrobe. He thought he was done with people who stayed up past midnight, but here she is, this strange woman swearing at her television.

Over the next several days, Bellamy lurks in the nether realm, watching his new human and trying to figure out how best to haunt her. As he suspected, she’s young, a few years younger than he is and a year older than his sister. Her name is Clarke Griffin, and she’s currently in med school. On the side, she’s working on restoring old furniture, although that seems to be something of a new hobby. Every night after she finishes with whatever else she’s doing, she’ll come into the spare room and work on her various antiques.

She starts with a cabinet, and that’s slow going. She’s got some instructions she seems to have printed off the internet and this one seems to be her test piece, the one she’s expecting to fuck up as part of the learning process.

If it was Bellamy, he would have figured out if he was any good at the whole restoration thing before he bought the stuff, but Clarke doesn’t seem to be the kind of person who thinks failure is an option. And she is an artist–the canvas on the easel is hers too–so she probably thinks the skills carry over.

He gives it a full ten days before he tries haunting her, waiting until she’s tired from a long week of work and done with her restoration work for the night. She’s on the couch with a cider when he flickers the lights in the apartment, and she doesn’t even seem to notice.

He does it again, and she makes a tired sound. “Stop.”

Bellamy freezes, but Clarke doesn’t follow up, and he realizes she’s talking to the lights, not to him. Her tone is resigned, exhausted, and guilt spikes in his stomach.

Which is the wrong way to feel; he’s a gremlin, it’s his job to annoy humans.

He flickers the lights again.

“Don’t make me call an electrician.” She drags herself up off the couch, bones cracking as she stands and stretches. “Fine, I’ll go to bed. I get the message.”

All of his attempts to fuck with her go something like that. When he hides her things, she just assumes she misplaced them. When something rattles, she kicks the closest object to her and tells it to be quiet. Her assumption seems to be that she’s so tired and her place is so shitty that there’s nothing that can’t be explained by simple incompetence, either on her own part or that of her appliances.

It’s not rewarding enough to keep doing it, but that doesn’t mean he gives up on the human world entirely. Clarke has a class schedule on the fridge, which means that he knows exactly when she’s gone during the day, and he can actually come out of the wardrobe and participate in the human world during the day without risk. He can actually go to businesses that aren’t bars, stores, or laundromats, visit museums and landmarks, get the real human experiences he’d been locked out of before.

It’s during one of those human experiences that he, to his horror, actually sees Clarke in the wild, without any veil of shadows to protect him. There’s a little coffee shop around the corner from her that makes an amazing chai latte, and he’s in there reading an article about the video game she’s been playing so he can keep up better when she just breezes in, hair in messy wisps and cheeks red from the cold. There’s always been a layer of reality between the two of them, keeping her from seeing him, but also keeping him from seeing her fully.

He knew she was pretty, but she’s so much better in full color.

She orders and goes to wait by the window, scrolling on her own phone. He lost track of time, hadn’t even realized her class had ended and she’d come back. It’s not nearly as hard for him to get back to his world as it is to get into hers, but it still feels strange, being in her apartment during the day. Like he’s trespassing.

More than usual.

When she takes her to-go cup, he drains his own mug, buses his table, and makes it out the door less than a minute after Clarke. His brain doesn’t catch up for another minute after that, when he realizes exactly what he’s doing. There’s no good way to chase a woman into her apartment, and he has no reason to be talking to Clarke in the first place. Talking to her is stupid. He’s lowkey haunting her, he shouldn’t be talking to her too. That’s actually inappropriate.

But when she gets to the apartment, he calls, “Hold the door?” She turns, surprised, and he flashes her a smile. “Sorry, didn’t want to get my keys.”

“No problem. New to the building?”

“Yeah, my grandfather and I just moved into number six,” he says, the lie easy. He knows enough about the building to know that there is an older guy in six who moved in recently and never leaves. Clarke might figure out he was lying, but she doesn’t talk to her neighbors much, and he’s definitely not going to talk to her much.

Definitely.

“Oh, yeah, I saw the trucks.”

“Bellamy,” he says, offering his hand, and she shakes. Her hand is small, warm and smooth, the touch sending a small thrill through him.

“Clarke. Number twelve.”

“I think I followed you out of the coffee shop,” he adds, nodding to her cup. Every logical, rational part of his brain is telling him to just stop talkingand leave, but the part of him that knows how cute she is isn’t having it. “I haven’t been here for long, but I’m already addicted to their chai.”

“I’ve never been a chai person,” she says, absent, as she checks her mail. “Or, I’ve never tried it. I just want caffeine directly pumped into my bloodstream, so coffee it is.”

“Well, I definitely recommend it.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.” She looks him up and down, not checking him out so much as sizing him up. “How starved are you for human contact? On a scale from one to ten.” At his blank look, she says, “Do you just hang out with your grandfather and never see other people?”

It’s only a small lie. Especially compared to all his other lies. “Pretty much, yeah.”

“Well, I’ve got alcohol and Netflix, if you ever want to hang out. As long as you don’t mind that I’m studying.”

“Studying for what?”

“I’m in med school.”

“I wouldn’t want to impose,” he says, honest and a ploy all at the same time.

“What are neighbors for?”

It’s stupid and reckless and absolutely nothing he is ever supposed to be doing, but he can’t resist. He smiles. “Let me grab some beer and I’ll be right up.”

There aren’t actually formal rules for interacting in the human realm, just kind of norms and rules of thumb. The big one is to not ruin things on a global scale, but not getting too close to humans or getting too attached is in there too. Of course, fae do leave their own realm, sometimes forever, but they don’t just sit on couches, watching TV with humans they’re supposed to be haunting. They usually do big, cool things, like Freddie Mercury. He knew how to leave the fae realm in style.

But Clarke’s couch is nice, and she has wifi, plus subscriptions to all the streaming services he’s never signed up for. And, well, she’s taking such good care of the wardrobe. It’s not done yet, not like some of her other pieces, but she’ll work on it off and on, and it’s looking better than he’s ever seen it. It’s the kind of care Bellamy would have taken of it, if he could have. And he used to lurk in the nether realm to watch her work, but it’s so much better when he can work with her, Clarke explaining what she’s doing and letting him help her with varnish and treatments, patient and amused as he learns.

It’s nothing he’s supposed to be doing at all, and he’s given up even pretending he’s haunting her. He turns off the TV when she leaves it on and puts the things she leaves in odd places somewhere she can find them easily. It’s an anti-haunting, and it’s taking up all his time.

“Seriously, we barely see you anymore,” Miller tells him.

The point is fair; the only reason they’re hanging out is that Miller popped into the nether realm and grabbed him. He’s been kind of hard to reach lately.

“It’s hard maintaining a fake life in the human realm,” he says, which is true. He’d thought it wouldn’t be that much more than he was doing before, but then Clarke said that she’d come get him at his grandfather’s apartment when she got home, and he realized he needed to actually keep up with whether or not she was coming to see him. He had to get one of those pay-as-you-go cellphones so she could call him, once he realized he couldn’t just upgrade the one he uses for internet without things he doesn’t have, like personal information and a credit card. It’s a lot of work.

“You don’t say,” says Miller, unsympathetic.

“I need to just tell her I moved,” he says. “Sneak out while she’s asleep like I used to do with Mr. Wallace.”

“That’s one really good option. Or you never should have started.”

“I’m not going to put in a request for time correction just for this. I can fix it myself.”

“Just saying, you knew this was stupid when you started, and you still did it. So I don’t know why you think you’d stop doing it.”

“I’ll get it out of my system.”

“You know how your sister and I never go to the human realm?” Miller asks, giving him a pensive look.

“Yeah.”

“That’s not hard. I’m not wishing I could go all the time. You used to bring Octavia and she didn’t like it. Plenty of fae go their whole lives without going into the human realm, and you can’t go more than a couple of days. You love it.”

“It’s–” he starts, the usual excuses coming to mind easily, but the words don’t come out. It is a family heirloom, the Blakes have always haunted this wardrobe, but he’s gone far beyond haunting. And it’s not as if anyone cares if he haunts the wardrobe. Clarke never even noticed.

She’d notice if he left now, of course. He’d have to tell her something. He’d have to leave her. And he could still do all the things he loved in the human realm, get coffee and watch movies and get into wikipedia-editing wars on folklore articles, but it wouldn’t be the same. Not now that he knows what it’s like doing those things with her.

“Yeah,” he says. “It’s really cool.”

“If you can’t leave, you could always stay,” Miller says, with a kind of practiced ease. “You wouldn’t be the first fae who decided to live in the human realm. You just have to decide.”

“You stalked the gateway between the realms just to tell me I should move?” he finally asks, and Miller shrugs.

“You weren’t figuring it out on your own. The way I figure, I might see you more if you were thinking about visiting here, instead of just stressing about your human girlfriend not figuring out you live in her closet.”

It would be really great if that wasn’t an accurate summary of his current issue, minus the girlfriend part, which is the only part he actually wants to be true. The worst of all combinations, really.

“Yeah,” he says. “Good tip.”

There is a process for relocating to the human world, everyone knows. He looked into it before, when he started feeling bad about just stealing everything and realized that he might want something like a credit card. But actually doing it is such a huge step. And it seems so dangerous, when he could just tell Clarke his grandfather is doing well enough he could find his own place. He’s already lying to her, shifting the lie isn’t that big a deal.

It’s not like he can tell her the truth.

He’s back at the coffee shop on a Saturday morning, idly looking for apartments and jobs, trying to figure out what living in the human world would even look like, when his phone buzzes with a message from Clarke: Are you busy?

Me: Not reallyGetting coffee Working on my novel

Clarke: You should put that in scare quotes“Working” on your “novel”I won’t believe it exists until you show me some actual words

Me: I really appreciate your supportWhat did you need?

Clarke: MuscleI’m taking some stuff to Roan and I need help loading the car

Me: SureYou want coffee?

Clarke: You’re the bestThanks

Before he was friends with Clarke, Bellamy would have just slipped into the nether world to get back into the building, but now that he’s interacting like a normal person who’s supposed to come to her door instead of out of her wardrobe, it’s a little more complicated. He figured out a trick where he can slide just his hand in and open the door from the inside, bypassing the need for a key, and then pull his hand back.

It would be easier if he just lived here, honestly.

Clarke gives him a bright smile when she opens the door and he has to remind himself he doesn’t get to kiss her. Instead, he hands over the coffee and says, “So, what am I helping with exactly?”

“Moving the refinished furniture,” she says, and his stomach drops. “My friend Roan has an antiques store, I sent him some pictures and he said he could resell and give me a cut. It’s easier than trying to do it through eBay, I don’t want to handle shipping.”

Bellamy had always known that, in theory, Clarke was going to sell the furniture she was working on, once it was done. And he’s even pretty sure that the wardrobe isn’t done yet. But once it is, it could go anywhere. She’ll take it to the antique store, and it’s going to look good enough that someone will buy it, and then he’ll be somewhere completely new, some strange, totally unknown place.

The thought of it takes up most of his brain as he helps Clarke load her products. As he expected, the wardrobe isn’t one of the pieces she’s selling, but it feels like he can see a countdown on it, ticking down minutes and hours until Clarke finishes and moves it out of her apartment and him out of her life.

“Is it weird I forgot you were selling these?” he asks as he pushes a small cabinet into the trunk of her car.

She smiles. “No, I forget too. I’m actually a little sad, I got attached.”

“Maybe they won’t sell and your friend will give them back.”

“Yeah, that sounds great,” she teases. “Thanks for that.”

“You’re the one who doesn’t believe I’m writing a novel.”

“True, I probably deserved it. You want to come to Roan’s? It’s about an hour each way, so feel free to say no.”

“Yeah, I’ve got some stuff to do,” he says. “Serious writing, I’m probably turning my phone off. But I’ll see you tomorrow?”

Her smile dims, but just a little. “You better show me some actual writing after this.”

“I know. Good luck at the antique store.”

“Thanks.”

As final straws go, his wardrobe being (potentially) sold again is maybe a silly one, but it’s easier to make an appeal around that than it is to admit that he’s fallen in love with a human and he doesn’t want to leave her. And, to be fair, even if Clarke doesn’t feel the same way he does–especially if she doesn’t–he still wants to keep track of the wardrobe. It’s his portal, and he needs to keep it.

The process is long less because it’s rare for requests to be turned down–anyone who’s applying is generally thought to be sure about it, permanent relocation isn’t common–and it involves Bellamy having to actually be in his own realm a lot, coming up with a backstory, working out how he’s going to live and get more human money.

He sends Clarke a lot of texts from inside her own wardrobe telling her that he had to leave town because of a family emergency–on his dad’s side, not his mom’s, so his grandfather wouldn’t be involved–and he’s aware, as he crouches in there, how fucking complicated the whole thing is. His life would be so much easier if he could just tell her, if his entire story didn’t sound faker than any of the lies he’s come up with. He can’t just tell her he’s a gremlin who fell in love with her while she was restoring the wardrobe which he uses as a gateway into her world. Even though he could theoretically prove it, it’s not a conversation he knows how to start.

When Clarke opens up the wardrobe door while he’s texting her, it sort of solves that problem.

They just stare at each other for a long moment, too surprised to actually say anything, until he finally manages, “I thought you had class.”

“It’s spring break.” She crosses her arms over her chest. “You break into my apartment when I’m at class? I haven’t even seen you for weeks.”

“It’s, uh–it’s not like that.” He wets his lips, scrambles to his feet. “Fuck, it’s such a long story.”

“You don’t say.”

“You’re not going to believe me.”

“Probably not, but try me anyway.”

Her mouth is a hard line, her jaw set, and he really should have figured out how to do this sooner, or at least not have been hanging out in her fucking wardrobe, no matter how safe it felt. He has no one but himself to blame, absolutely saw this coming, but some part of him is still vaguely resentful. It’s an overall bizarre situation, but he was doing his best. He couldn’t just tell her the truth; it was too fucking weird.

“Your grandfather had never heard of you, by the way,” she says, twisting the knife. “So keep that in mind with whatever you’re telling me.”

He exhales. “There’s a portal to another realm in the wardrobe, I live in that realm, I was trying to haunt you, but you’re so disorganized you didn’t even notice when I was fucking with you. But then, uh–you were fixing the wardrobe and I saw you at the coffee shop and I wanted to talk to you, so I did. And I kept on wanting to talk to you. Fuck, Clarke, you’re–I know how unbelievable all this sounds, but I swear it’s true.”

Her face gives nothing away as she thinks it over, and Bellamy makes himself keep his mouth shut. If she’s mad, he can always leave, go home, give up on the whole moving to the human realm idea. His wardrobe will go somewhere else, and he’ll probably be smart enough to not fall in love with its next owner.

“If that’s a lie, it’s the stupidest lie I’ve ever heard,” she finally says.

“Yeah, my actual lies were a lot smarter. I didn’t think you’d ever talk to the guy in six.”

“I was worried,” she snaps. “Why were you sitting on the wardrobe floor?”

He holds up his phone. “Cell reception. I wanted to text you. I don’t have a lot of time, but I wanted to check in.”

She takes another minute to process, and then says, “Okay, so–how does this work? What are you? A ghost?”

“No, uh–gremlin.”

Her eyebrows shoot up. “Gremlin?”

“Yeah. We guard gateways to the human realm. This one’s been in my family for generations. It’s been at the Wallace house since before the Civil War, but the owner of the house died and his son sold–at least the wardrobe, I don’t know what else.”

“And you just come into this world to hang out.”

“We don’t have the internet,” he says. “The fae realm is fine, but kind of boring.”

“So you’ve just been–sneaking out of my apartment, breaking into the building, coming back up here, and knocking on my door so you can hang out with me? How do you get back in to leave?”

“There’s another realm, the nether realm?” She looks dubious, and he soldiers on. “It’s kind of like–the shadow world. I can slip into that and then you can’t see me. But I can only get out of it in the wardrobe, so it’s still kind of a pain. I’ve been wanting to tell you, but I didn’t think you’d believe me.”

“Can you go into the nether world?” she asks, sounding interested. “And do something?”

It’s a logical question, but it still makes his palms sweat. He’d never really let himself think about telling her, let alone her believing him, his having to live with her knowing the truth. If she does know what he is, he doesn’t know what comes next.

Apparently, he’s going to find out.

“What do you want me to do?”

“Whatever you were doing to haunt me.”

He wets his lips, puts his phone in his pocket, and then he finds a shadow and slides into it. He can see Clarke’s eyes widen as he disappears, and she leans into the wardrobe, trying to find him.

As tricks go, it’s a pretty good one.

He can’t actually move things directly in the human realm, but anything he’s carrying will be pulled into the nether realm with him, so he takes one of her paintbrushes and drops it, making her jump and whirl as it clatters to the ground. He does it again, with her watching this time, and she swallows hard.

“But you can only come back out through the wardrobe,” she says, and then laughs. “I guess you can’t answer me.”

He did test it out, when he was trying to haunt Mr. Wallace, but humans can’t hear him here. The veil is too thick.

“Can you touch me?”

That one he’s never tried, so he crosses the room, reaches out for her hand, his curiosity getting ahead of his common sense. Humans can enter the fae realm, if they’re shown the door, so there shouldn’t be any reason that she can’t come into the nether realm with him too.

Instead, when his hand curls around hers, he feels himself sliding through the shadows and back to her, like she’s her own gateway all by herself.

“Apparently, yeah,” he says, and she laughs, breathless and surprised, tugs his hand until he steps in, and she kisses him.

He melts into the kiss, relief making him boneless, and mouth curls into a smile.

“You believe me?”

“I have more questions. But I really wanted to do that.”

“Me too.” He wets his lips, still grinning. “So, uh, I was going to move to this realm and ask you to sell me the wardrobe. And then ask you out, once I had my own place and a job and stuff.”

“You can buy a wardrobe without a job, but not ask me out?”

“Buying the wardrobe was less scary.”

“I wasn’t going to sell it anyway,” she says, tucking her hair behind her ear. “It’s the one we did together.”

Once the wardrobe is done, they move it into the bedroom (once Bellamy has assured Clarke that it’s inaccessible from the fae realm unless he opens it), across from their bed, next to the mirror, this perfectly sized space that looks like it was specially made.

It wasn’t, of course, just like the left side of Clarke’s bed wasn’t made for Bellamy, no matter how well he fits there.

Sometimes, things just work out.

[prettyandsarcastic]

A Gift

So today is @ladylike-foxes birthday and as a gift I decided to write a little something featuring her Arcana Apprentice Rune, because she is an angel who has listened to me whine about school and my parents and my life. 

This takes place at the start of the game, the same day that Asra leaves, and there’s some in-game dialogue used. 

I hope I kept Rune as in character as possible. I went through her character tag to find out what I could about her, but there’s not a whole lot so I added my apprentice Orla to give me a stepping off. Also I haven’t written anything in... a long time, so this is kinda rough, but I hope you like it anyway!

Happy Birthday!

EDIT: Everytime I try to put this under a Read More, it screws up and makes my quotations and apostrophe’s weird special characters. Sorry!

“Rune!”

Rune looks up from her sweeping as Asra pushes aside the curtain to the backroom and wanders into the shop proper. “Wait ‘til you see what the woods had to offer today!” he says, smiling brightly as he overturns his bag onto the counter.

“Oh wow!” she says, setting aside the broom before beginning to sort through the assortment of things Asra has brought back. Most of it is edible, ingredients for simple meals but there’s quite a few magical ingredients they can use for the shop. He watches from the other side of the counter, head propped on his hands, delight dancing in his eyes. “This is way more than we need right now. Why did you get so much?”

Nonetheless, Rune turns from the counter to find empty canisters to store the things Asra has brought back, to separate what will stay downstairs and what will go upstairs. When she turns back around, she notices some of the mirth fall away in Asra’s expression as he stands to his full height again. There’s an uneasiness that seems to drape itself over his shoulders, his gaze suddenly going askance.

“I thought it would be better to have plenty,” he says, voice quieter than it was moments ago. “I don’t want to leave you here with nothing to eat but pumpkin bread.”

Rune’s hand stills over a small animal skull, bleached white by the sun. Oh. There’s an ache that settles in her chest at the thought of him leaving again, it feels as though he had just returned from his last trip. It meant worrying and sleepless nights and –

“So you are leaving again?”

Orla.

Rune’s head snaps in the direction of the stairs just in time to see her step into the room. Orla’s face is blank, stilled into her usual mask of placid disinterest, but Rune can easily see the storm behind her eyes. They both hate when Asra leaves, but Orla has never been afraid to tell him just how much.

Asra gives her a reluctant nod, eyes softening in the way they always do around Orla – like regret and with a thousand apologies that he doesn’t quite know how to begin. “Yes. Tonight,” he replies. And Rune’s heart gives a painful lurch with the pleading tone of his voice, the way it begs Orla not to start this argument again.

But all of them know better.

Orla steps up to the end of the counter between Asra and Rune, braces her hands against the top. “Take us with you,” she says, tone sharp with the implication that it’s not a request. “Either of us. We want to go with you.”

Rune doesn’t say anything, doesn’t voice her own desire to go with Asra, but she glances between her master and fellow apprentice. This argument isn’t new, but it feels… different from the others somehow. She knows that Orla doesn’t really mean to be so aggressive with him, that she loves him in her own way, but the frustration at Asra’s secret-keeping gets the better of her and turns her best of intentions into anger.

Asra blinks and his eyes falls from Orla’s determined face as he sighs. He holds out his hands to both of them, Rune and Orla each take one without thought as he leads them away from the counter to stand in front of him. His soft gaze wanders between them and his hands come up to cup their faces, his thumbs soothing along the angle of their cheekbones.

Both girls breathe a sigh, softening under Asra’s touch.

“I know you both want to come, and I wish I could take you… but –”

“It’s too risky?” Orla finishes for him. And all of a sudden her hackles are raised again and color rises to the apples of her cheeks. “It’s always too risky! Or too far for us but not for you! Why is that?”

“Orla, please.”

She shakes her head, mouth contorting into a grimace as she twists out of Asra’s reach. Rune steps to reach for her, offer whatever comfort she can but Orla takes a step back from even her and Rune is shocked to see the glassy sheen in her eyes.

“I’m going out,” she announces to no one in particular and moves to brush past Asra to the back door. With her hand on the doorknob Orla twists and over her shoulder says, “I hope you find what you’re looking for this time, Master.”

When she slams the door shut in her wake, the window rattles so hard Rune is afraid for a moment it’s going to shatter. It wouldn’t be the first time.

In front of her Asra releases such a long breath that she’s certain he had been holding it. “That went well,” he mumbles. “Sometimes I think she would just rather I didn’t come back at all.”

“Don’t say that!” Rune snaps at him and Asra at least has the decency to look chagrined. “She just… worries, and it comes out wrong… we both worry.”

What Rune doesn’t say is just how big the shop feels without him, or just how wide the bed the three of them share becomes without Asra’s warmth between her and Orla. Doesn’t tell him that neither of them really sleep, that she stays up playing her fiddle to the wee hours and Orla comes home bloody and bruised more often when he’s gone. She doesn’t tell him that sometimes it feels like she and Orla just go through the motions until he returns.

But again, Rune is suddenly overcome with the feeling that something about this time is different and it teases at the edges of her mind. It makes the hair on the back of her neck stand on end. She wonders, briefly, if Orla might have felt the same thing and that was why her argument with Asra was more impassioned than times before.

“I know,” he says, reaching out to draw Rune to him, “but it’ll be alright.”

Even with Asra’s assurances and his arms around her it does nothing to ease the disquiet whispering in the back of Rune’s mind.

Something’s coming. She’s certain of it.

.

Orla breathes a relieved sigh when she finally crests the top of the stairs into the small apartment above the magic shop. Managing to make it into the shop and up the stairs without incident is a feat, but Orla knows the way the shop settles, times her movements around the building’s natural creaks and groans.

Asra’s already gone. She feels his absence in the air around her, in the stillness that settles over the shop in the wake of his departure. With it comes an ache, or a hollowness that yawns in the space behind her ribs – guilt, probably, though Orla doesn’t want to admit it – for not being here to send him off.

What if something happens to Asra on his journey and the last words Orla had spoken to him had been harsh and angry?

Orla shakes the thought from her head. It’s too late to think about it now anyway.  

She turns to venture into the washroom, to rinse her face and hands when behind her, Orla hears the sound of someone snapping their fingers and the room at her back suddenly comes to life with light.

Orla’s eyes slide closed as she sighs, “Damn it.”

“Aren’t you tired of getting caught yet?” Rune says behind her.

Orla shrugs. “I’ll get lucky some day.”

But she knows better. Rune doesn’t sleep well when Asra’s gone. Neither of them do, really, crowding into the middle of the bed, into the space his body usually occupies, sometimes pressing so close their noses touch. The space he leaves behind is so much more than his physical absence that it’s all they can do to go about their daily lives.

“You missed Asra leaving, he waited as long as he could,” she tells her and Orla doesn’t miss the displeasure in Rune’s tone.

Her shoulders round in on themselves under the weight of Rune’s disappointment. “I know.”

Behind her, Orla hears the legs of the chair scrape against the floor as Rune stands and begins to walk toward her. “I understand why you’re so hard on him, but he doesn’t like leaving us anymore than we like – oh gods!” Rune cuts herself off suddenly as she rounds in front of Orla and gets a proper look at her friend’s face. “You went down to the docks again, didn’t you?”

Orla knows she must look a fright. She can feel it in the way one eye is trying to swell shut, the way it hurts to breathe through her nose, and the blood dried in her hairline; the way every time she talks the split in her bottom lip gapes and bleeds anew. And that’s only what Rune can see. And really it looked a lot worse before Orla tried to heal some of it. But… healing magic has never been her strong suit so she just had to be satisfied with the fact that she managed to dull the pain enough so she could make it home.

“It’s not as bad as it looks?” she offers, and tries to smile.

Rune blinks at her like she can’t understand what Orla just said, annoyance evident in the slight twitch of her eye. “Your definition of not as bad as it looks and mine are two completely different things,” she says. After a moment, Rune sighs, “Come on, let’s get you cleaned up.”

“To be fair,” Orla says as she follows Rune to the washroom, “I did try to sneak in so you wouldn’t have to see this.”

Rune doesn’t deign to reply as she forces Orla into the washroom, then out of her torn and bloodstained clothes and into the tub before starting the water. She putters around while the water rises, gathering different bottles and small tins of ointment, digging Orla’s hairbrush and sleep clothes out of the dresser.

As Orla watches Rune bustle around, guilt wedges itself in the back of her throat. This is exactly why she had tried to sneak in.

“You don’t have to do this, Rue,” Orla says, drawing her knees up to her chin. But she does it every time.

Rune pauses in her movements, hand still hovering over the candle she’s just lit. She takes a breath to answer, but seems to think better of it and shakes her head before continuing. After she’s dumped a generous amount of bath salts into the tub, Rune turns off the water, rolls up the legs of her pants and sits herself on the edge of the tub behind Orla, her knees on either side of the other girl’s shoulders. She still doesn’t speak as she pours warm water over Orla’s hair and gently massages the dried blood from the white strands.

Rune reaches over the edge of the tub and Orla hears the sound of a bottle uncorking. “I can heal the worst of it tonight,” Rune says, putting the bottle back down and then suddenly the room fills with the smell of lavender as Rune slicks the oil over Orla’s bruised, sore muscles. “The rest I can heal tomorrow.”

“Thank you,” Orla says, tilts her head backwards to look up at Rune and tries to smile.

Rune rolls her eyes, brushes the washcloth over her face as gently as possible. “I don’t do this because I have to you know,” she says, massaging healing magic into the skin around her eye until the swelling begins to go down. “I do it because I love you and we have to look after one another while Asra’s gone.”

Orla nods, tilts her head to rest against Rune’s thigh and because Rune is one of the only people that can soften Orla’s sharpness admits, “I just… wish he didn’t keep so many secrets from us.”

And Rune sighs, soothing her hand over Orla’s damp hair. “I know, me too.”

.

“Asra had me do a reading for him before he left,” Rune tells Orla as they sit on their bed after Rune’s washed away the blood and soothed the bruises.

Orla shudders. “His deck gives me the creeps.”

Behind her, Rune laughs softly making another pass through Orla’s hair with the brush. “I know, that’s why he left it with me. He joked that you probably would have made him hide it somewhere.”

“I would have!”

The girls share another laugh until the sound of frantic knocking echo from downstairs up to their room. Orla looks over her shoulder, “Did you forget to put out the lantern?”

With a shake of her head Rune stands from the bed. “I don’t think I did, and even so… it’s a little too late for a reading.”

They sit in silence for a moment, barely daring to breathe, both of them hoping that whoever was at the door might just leave. Just as it seems like whoever it is has left, the knocking returns harder and more insistent than before.

Orla sighs as she stands as well. “Might as well go see who it is.”

Together, the two girls head down into the shop to deal with the stranger at the door entirely unaware that it was about to change everything.

[ansu-gurleht]

my common dreams/features of dreams:

dreams where my me and my ex either get back together, or never broke up in the first place. we’re happy together.

dreams of me meeting with other exes, with the suggestion but usually not the realization of getting back together. usually sexual undertones or outright sexual acts.

dreams that take place at “home” rarely take place in my current house. they usually take place in the house my family lived in before this one, almost always.

dreams where my mother is still alive. lots of rationales for this: she never died; her death was some kind of ruse or cover up; she gets brought back to life; i somehow get transported to an alternate reality where she never died; etc. most of the time, she’s like i remember her, and the dreams are very happy and nostalgic and peaceful. sometimes, she’s subtly or outright evil/abusive.

dreams at school. not usually at college; the ones at college usually focus on dorm life, not actual classes. those dorm dreams often focus on unpacking after moving in; packing to move out; moving in early; moving out late; etc. most of my school dreams are me having to go back to highschool or middle school for some reason. sometimes it’s because we find out i “missed” some crucial class that i shouldntve graduated without taking, and i have to go back. often, it’s because my father makes me go back, even though i don’t have to, because he feels like i need to so that i’m doing something. those dreams are almost universally miserable.

dreams where i’m either playing a game, or i’m in the game. the difference often isn’t obvious or consistent, and can go back and forth during the dream. sometimes i discover i’m better at the game than i actually am in real life, with better aptitude for the controls; sometimes i struggle with basic inputs and timings, or find that the correct inputs aren’t working.

dreams at my last job. they usually involve me utilizing various backrooms, although as far as i remember, always acknowledge that i don’t work there anymore.

false awakenings. often over and over and over. these often actually take place in at my actual current home, or places that at least resemble my home. a lot of the time, my room has windows into the hallway outside, or other doors, through which people often look or enter without permission or warning.

sex dreams that never get anywhere satisfying.

dreams where i have to fight people to defend myself or others, except my punches never connect, or i can’t put any force behind them.

dreams featuring “supernatural” powers, like magic or superpowers, except they never actually work. it’s always more like larping, where we shout out what we’re doing. sometimes, everyone else’s powers work normally, but mine are that fake kind.

semilucid dreams, where i’m able to recognize i’m dreaming, and can tell others, “oh, i’m just dreaming, and also you’re not real.” i say “semilucid” because that realization of dreaming almost never gives me any control over the dream, except maybe the ability to wake up.

related: dreams where i bite my tongue or pinch myself to check if i’m dreaming. it’s never very conclusive: i can feel the “pressure” of the bite or pinch, but i can’t quite tell if it hurts.

very terrifying, awful dreams. very painful. very powerless. always some supernatural or seemingly-supernatural force pursuing me or toying with me in its grasp, often for what seems like ages. i don’t care to elaborate further.

[nosocialjaila-blog]

Grandpa’s Theory of Reality

[MONDAY] OCTOBER 7TH, 2012

I felt my teeth close to shattering inside my mouth. I tumbled on the floor, and my back slammed against the lockers, creating a rattling sound of how much force I was hit with. I looked through the crack of my hair that was covering my forehead. Eden stood tall to represent his dominance compared to mine. I’ve never talked to Eden before; he wasn’t relevant enough for me to remember. I don’t recall doing any mischievous acts this past week either. In seconds, a man with thick black glasses, ran to where every student had their attention on. His gray hair was falling out; I remembered him briefly saying it was because of the stress he dealt with back home. He glanced at me and collected his thoughts before sighing. He pinched the bridge of his nose, and then turned around to the spectating students. I continued to feel the neverending stinging sensation on my right cheek. It felt like little needles stabbing me when I tried to change my facial expressions. I raised my right hand that was trembling. I cupped my swollen, heated cheeks, and softly brushed my thumb across.

OCTOBER, 2012

“She can’t even buy me a new phone. Even after all the things I’ve done for her! My dad is the same. He always takes her side. If it’s not about me changing who I am, it’s about school, and my grades! There’s no support from them. I wish that they could just--”

“I find you pathetic, you know that? A joke. I see you as a selfish creature. That’s all,” I said to her, without my eyes wandering around.

“What?” she said in a nervous chuckle.

“Yeah,” I paused, “You keep blabbing about how much your parents keep pestering  you about your education. If they are so damn annoying, get a job, live alone, do something useful for once.”

She frowned. “Why are you talking like that?”

“Because I can’t stand people like you. People like you disgust me.” I placed my coat and beanie on. Without another word, I left her alone at the swingset, when it was freezing cold and midnight.

[TUESDAY] OCTOBER 8TH, 2012

I breathed into my hands to keep warm. I carried a plastic bag of Chinese food down a gravel path with trees surrounding the area. I walked down the rocky path where my grandfather was buried. It’s an old cemetery, and usually no one would be here, but today, I noticed a family sobbing in front of a gravestone. The mother had flowers wrapped around her arms; the father was holding his young daughter with pigtails.

The flowers and boxes I left before were still sitting on my grandfather’s grave.

“Hey, old man,” I said, before I sat down.

I unwrapped the plastic bag, and pulled out two boxes of rice and fried noodles. My grandfather used to buy Chinese food for me when I felt uninvited at my father’s house. For someone so old, he was quite adventurous and ready to go places. I snapped my two chopsticks apart, and I began tugging up the noodles out of the box. The two flavors mixed well with each other. A taste of overpowering salty fried food, and a plain taste of white rice to keep it balanced.

OCTOBER, 2002

“This game sucks!” I complained to grandpa.

He laughed at me and handed me my box of food. Grandpa and I were playing one of his old board games. It was complicated with numbers and names. It’s about stealing property and traveling back in time.

“It’s more a puzzle than a board game,” he told me, after taking a bite out of his food. “Time is an important thing. It gives us reality. That’s what this game is actually about.”

I looked down at the game once more. I saw no evidence of this game actually being educational and significant to my life. I shrugged my shoulders at him.

“With time, our lives are all connected. Humans are incredible creatures. We tend to overlook our differences, rather than looking at what we all share in common. The air we breathe, the water we need, the earth we share, the universe we conquered. We all strive for the same things in life.”

“What is it?” I asked.

“Happiness, and the support to reach that happiness. Humans are selfish creatures.”

“I don’t really see life that way, old man,” I chuckled.

“You don’t?”

I shook my head at him, and touched my character piece for the board game. It was the shape of a bird that had its wings spread. I was only seven years young, but I felt mature enough to understand grandpa’s words.

“Tell you what,” grandpa paused, “Why don’t you tell me the five senses you learned so far?”

I tapped my finger on my lips. “There’s smell, touch, taste, sight… and hearing?”

He nodded with a smile. “There’s many more, but those five, you’ll experience reality in all shapes and forms. For example, let’s say you walk into a room, and it smells like cigarettes. What do you associate that smell with?”

I laughed, “Dad.”

“See? With the simplest things, lives can be connected with memories and sometimes, the future. Things like objects, music, food, color, numbers. Every human is significant to life and we all were born with values. The world syncs together with our senses and perception. Humans are connected with the universe, even what is invisible to the eye, we are still connected. You can experience the unreal if you finally start accepting reality.”

I didn’t believe him. I didn’t really want to see the world that way.

[WEDNESDAY] OCTOBER 9TH, 2012

With severe caution, I tried to focus on myself and my surroundings. I wanted to talk to my father for a change. I wasn’t planning to go too far and join him for dinner, but I wanted to remind him that I still exist. I dawdled down the main hallways of the school, and turned corners until I reached his classroom. My father’s been a teacher for officially six years now. It was two hours after school was over, so I didn’t see anyone here, except him. His door was slightly cracked open. Before I barged in, I heard him singing to himself in a hoarse voice. I leaned my body against the wall and chuckled with my hand over my mouth. I started to I listen intensely to the song he chose to sing. It sounded familiar with slow instrumental and beat.

OCTOBER, 2005

“The normal routine?” the pretty bartender asked, after she had wiped the table next to me.

I gave her a friendly nod. Seeing a therapist wasn’t helpful, and to be frank, I wasted a good amount of money on answers I could’ve found on the internet. The White Rabbit is where I drown myself to avoid my son at home. I guess on some level I wanted to blame him for tearing up the perfect family photo. I shouldn’t blame him, but subconsciously, I do. A waiter sent me a plate of oily french fries and drinks that I’d soon consume before midnight. Out of the blue, my wife and I’s anniversary song goes on the speakers. I slouched down in my chair, then proceeded to pick and play with my fries. Each lyric and each beat used to be my happiness and future, now, I felt sadness and sorrow.

“Tell me about it, Doc,” my co-worker demanded, after he sat down with a bottle of beer in his right hand. His white lab coat was stained with drinks from earlier.

I knew he’d follow me around until he was satisfied. “How’s your son?” I questioned.

“He told me to go to hell, so, I came here.”

I laughed at how sarcastic he could be, yet serious, too. “How do you not get angry at him for disrespecting you like that? How do you not get anxious that one day you’ll fail to save a patient's life?”

I changed the subject quite fast because I secretly didn’t want to know why he was so easy going, and I wasn’t. He raised a brow, and took a sip from his drink before he responded.

“My son isn’t a patient, Wes. I know that teenagers, they don’t think before they speak. Teenagers, they go through that change in high school where they deal with emotions and stress. I’m not the only person giving him a hard time at life. What he goes through, is the same things I go through. That’s what family is.”

I picked up my glass and began drinking to end the night with a positive feeling. I didn’t quite understand what he meant, but I should since I have a son too.

“I miss my wife,” I finally admitted, coming out of my shell.

“You’ll miss your son more if you keep this up.” He gave me a smile, and picked up one of my glasses before I did.

[THURSDAY] OCTOBER 10TH, 2012

I waited outside of the flower shop for it to open. In my right hand, I held a black umbrella to keep the rain from soaking the thin layers of clothing I wore. I figured that my grandfather should get more flowers if I’m going to visit him. I listened as the sound of raindrops trickled down off the building, onto my umbrella, and made a rumbling sound. The entrance door opened, and I saw a middle-aged woman looking at me with large eyes. She paused for a split second, and then moved to the side to invite me in. Once the owner walked off to the backroom, I began to explore the shop. It was spring, yet the flowers looked dead and sad. At the corner of the store, I noticed a bundle of purple vivid flowers in a small vase. I walked near them, and scanned at each pedal, whether they were dying or not. I smiled at the results and leaned forward to get a whiff of the smell. It smelt like the hospital.

OCTOBER, 2003

“Grandpa?” I asked, tugging on his shirt with my tiny hand.

My grandpa glanced down at me. “Yes, Benny?”

“Mom said she’d play hopscotch with me and dad. Does she feel better?”

Starting tomorrow, it’d be a week since the incident happened, and since mom’s been resting in the hospital. I trust in grandpa and the doctors with their words on mom going to be okay in the end.

“Hmm… not better, but she will eventually. How about we check on your father?” he suggested, and proceeded to grab my hand. “Do you know where he is?”

“Dad’s in the potty room. He said he had a stomachache. I didn’t want him to throw up on me.”

My grandpa let go of my hand. His face scrunched up, and he wiped his tears away with the palm of his hand. He left me alone in the waiting room. I figured he went to check on my dad to see if he was okay by himself. I quickly scurried off down the halls to find mom’s door, once the doctors had disappeared. She wasn’t feeling good, and the doctors and grandpa wouldn’t explain why. I saw her a few days ago. I entered room 342; that’s where mom was. She laid down on the bed with tubes and machines hooked up to her. Mom’s eyes were closed, and she seemed to be more in pain today than yesterday.

“Mom?” I sat next to her bed. “Mom? What happened to your fingers?”

Mom’s fingers were covered in cuts and purple bruises. I grabbed her hand gently, and rubbed my thumb across the large scar on her palm. I felt a strange pain in my stomach. The touch of her hand felt cold and weak. I felt like she wasn’t asleep any longer, nor was she awake. I didn’t hear her breathe in that loud snore she made when she’s asleep. I looked around the room for grandpa, but he was nowhere to be seen. The room was bland and gray. The only color that stood out was a purple bouquet of flowers by the doctor’s sink. I let go of the cold touch, and ran to the flowers. They smelt like the outside when our family would go camping in the spring, but also, they smelt like the hospital. I brought it back to the bed, and started to take each flower out of the bundle one-by-one. I placed them in her hand where I previously held with my hand. Just like that, my mother slowly curled up her fingers, and held the flowers with all the strength she had left with her.

[FRIDAY] OCTOBER 11TH, 2012

I stood in the living room with a blank expression on my face. I was locked in the corner with my two feet glued to the floor. This was a new house, and I was in a different state and city. Yet, this place gave me a clear image of what went down on a cold Friday afternoon. I felt it all tingling inside me. The touch of fire, the smell and taste of gas polluting the air, the sound of the crackling house, and the sight of fear in my mother’s eyes. This “experience” I had, it was threatening me; it was lurking behind me until I experienced it again.

OCTOBER, 2003

My parents were bickering back and forth, because dad kept losing money from playing card games. Mom told me to stay inside the house, and occupy myself since she wouldn’t be able to watch me. I played with my toys and listened to the TV in the background. I found my father’s pack of cigarettes tucked in between the wall and the back of the couch.

“You were just a kid,” I heard someone tell me.

I blinked three times and saw my father in the kitchen. He just finished mowing the lawn; it was my job, but I never followed his house instructions. He took off his cap, and wiped his forehead with the hem of his shirt.

“You see it, too? You see the horrific sight I see every night?”

I gulped at his brief description, and nodded. “Do you blame me?”

“I do,” he paused, “but I’m the one who smokes.”

I scratched the back of my head and finally took off my shoes. I walked in the living room and touched the walls. I remembered the walls peeling off and cracking, when the fire spread throughout the room.

“Benny!” she called out for me, “Benny! Come here!”

My mom searched the entire house for her only child, and I didn’t even attempt to move my legs. I cupped my ears and squatted in a ball. I was too afraid that she’d be mad at me for starting a fire in their new home. I could imagine my dad’s face if he found out I was playing with his matches and cigarettes. I ran, and ran, into the woods behind a small park near. I could still faintly hear her screams and cries. They echoed in my ears as I got further away from the visible black smoke behind me. I slipped on mud, and stumbled down a hill. My back slammed against a tree. I squeezed my body to hide. Too many scenarios had entered my head for me to relax. Tears streamed down my cheeks, to my chin, and splattered on my shirt. The sight of a burnt out campfire was the last picture in my mind.

“Do you think she blames me?” I hesitated to ask.

“No,” he said quickly, “Your mother is a far better person than I am. Your mother, she had burns from her head to toes. I left that house without a scratch.”

I started to become very nauseous from the overwhelming memories. I started to see mom’s face again; a pure face I erased from my memory to avoid the guilt and pain I caused. I understood why I am overly sensitive. I understood why I rejected Eden’s sister when she talked badly about her own parents.

“I’m sorry,” I mumbled, “I ruined your life. I’m sorry I stopped you from saving lives.”

He was surprised to know I was capable of apologizing. He walked towards me with his hat dangling in his hand. He couldn’t forgive me for killing the one person he loved entirely, but really, he couldn’t forgive himself. I could tell. The look in his eyes gave it away. Maybe it wasn’t his eyes. Perhaps, it’s the fact that humans really have no differences when it comes to reality. That reality is an illusion that can only be figured out if you accept it.