#i will def miss most collectibles but i think it will actually be good to let go of the urge to get em all

[lesbianshadowheart]

'Players will optimize the fun out of the game' is such a bizarre conept to me. Video games, to me, fulfill 2 needs: playing with dolls (roleplaying a compelling narrative) and getting immersed in a fictional world. i am constantly on a quest to make every game i play more difficult than it needs to be to achieve these goals. i'll turn off the minimap in your open world game and play it like it's firewatch dont fucking try me

[channoticedmeuwu]

𝐓𝐗𝐓 𝐀𝐒 . . . (cliche) highschool romance tropes !!

🎧 𓈒 ◯ 𓏸 ﹒ ⭐ ﹒ ⌣⌣ ﹒ ☆

p : txt × fem!reader | g : fluffy fluff, slightly suggestive, cliche tropes 🫡 | w : suggestive sometimes? none really unless you consider fights a warning, not proofread

a/n : needed to get this out of my system lolll in love w hyuka rn.

🎧 — shy (eh o), loser lover, lotus, hula hoops, too many nights, mon amour, love is banned, BTBT

YEONJUN | BAD BOY × GOOD GIRL

came in my mind in the shower. yes. I just feel that yeonjun would def be the popular guy, carries around a leather jacket and has dyed hair and everything, and hangs out with his cool friends who skip class all the time etc etc. and then he sees you, so pretty and in the moment, and you're always so composed and kept to yourself that it's almost like an immediate form of intrigue for him. it's weird that he's so into you when you've never spoken. and he's like....wtf. it's like, exchanging prolonged glances during class and accidentally brushing against each other's shoulders while walking in the halls. you know that you, the well known rule follower, could never talk to someone like yeonjun, the well known rule breaker. and yet, you broke that self made rule for the first time when he came by your locker to give you a note and ask you to a date—which seemed so out of character for yeonjun. maybe you're the first one he'd follow traditional ideas for.

SOOBIN | ACADEMIC RIVALS

I said it before I'll say it again. SOOBIN ACADEMIC RIVALS AGENDA !! even wrote a whole fic 😭 I just think he's so neat as the school's pride and joy; has no trouble completing assignments and meets deadlines, and totally leaves the class speechless with how fast he finishes tests and exams. but then, his cool and calm persona breaks when he sees the class cheering for you during the timed group math assignment you have to do on dust boards. and he glances to his side of the board. how the fuck did you finish that before him? and so the unspoken rivalry continues as you tend to beat him more in assignments, draws being exclaimed for the both of you in awards supposed to be for one winner, and so on. and unspoken feelings tend to blossom when soobin finds himself growing weak at the scowl you make when you don't understand a question, or the proud smile you wear facing him yet again.

BEOMGYU | ROCKSTAR + finding each other in a raw moment

cuz I'm just a teenage dirtbag babyyy. giving rodrick heffley vibes. probably would put all his allowance in buying a guitar n amp. didn't take lessons so now he's on the road to self learning 💪💪 feminist !!!!! ok but all jokes aside, he'd be late to a practice, cycling on the empty road when he sees you, walking with an armful of books because unlike mr teenage dirtbag you actually take school seriously (do you see where I'm going with this?), and he'd miss a rock on the road, causing his bike to stumble and fall, crashing right into you. so now the two of you lay on the floor, joints scratched and head aching as you scowl at each other. "what the fuck, choi beomgyu?" and he'd see you, pretty as ever, in the evening light, cheeks pink in the most perfect way and hair perfectly set up; as if you were going somewhere. when he notices your tears. "are you crying?" and you look away, angry that you let it show.

"why do you care?" you would ask, irritated, collecting all the books you dropped and trying to rub your eyes clear of all tears, probably smudging some make up along the way. and beomgyu would help you, helping you dust your outfit and overly apologizing. he didn't understand who would hurt you, but it struck a nerve in him. enough to ask you what happened, and offered to cycle you home. he's already late to practice, so does it really matter if he misses it or not? and when he finally drops you home, you give him a hug, thanking him for being so sweet (after almost running you over 😒😒).

and maybe that pulls choi beomgyu's heartstrings to play an unfamiliar melody that echoed in the empty, sunlit streets as a small smiled plastered over his face, exchanging a glance before you shut the door behind you.

TAEHYUN | FAKE DATING

it just. makes sense. he's so not into you and you're so not into him. but holy shit, the rest of the school is. and you're like, let's give them what they want, right? esp when you want to get back at your ex for being such an ass to you during your breakup. y/n redemption arc but make it hotter. and taehyun was perfect, since he needed his friends to stop teasing him for being the only one who hasn't dated anyone yet. match made in hell, right? well, romantic feelings can be lucifer themselves, because when you and taehyun shared a secret (or not so secret) kiss right on the kitchen counter at yeonjun's party, shit turned weird. because last you recall, taehyun's scent wasn't lurking in your mind like it did that night, and he couldn't get the feeling of your lips smiling against him while the background blurred around him. and he distinctly remembers pushing a hand against the dozen cameras flashing around the two of you as all the people you tried to spite watched—as if you two were actually a thing. and god, explain the feeling of his heartbeat in his throat that he couldn't get rid of—as your eyes met, causing his mouth to go dry—if you guys were just acting?

a match made in hell, right?

HUENINGKAI | BEST FRIENDS TO LOVERS + a lil ♡ triangle

he's the sweetest boy you've ever met, and he watches from afar, a sad glint in his eyes as you try to warm up to your crush, testing the waters with hyuka before you could attempt it on your crush. like, fuck, did you have to grab his tie like that, pull him close and ask "does this do anything or are you just choking?" do you even know what kind of effect you had on him? and hyuka would just sit in a corner, munch on a snack he bought as you would try to impress your crush yet again, only to receive a stupid “huh?” as a response.

hyuka had his moments, moments where he wanted to slap the shit out of the boy, and scream at him “SHE'S INTO YOU, GODDAMMIT!” and spell it out for the clueless asshole, as the more you'd advance at him the more apparently confused he'd get. you were convinced your crush was just dumb, because he couldn't straight up tell you that he's not into you, and seeing you sulk after every obvious hint you dropped riled hyuka up. and he was especially pissed the fuck off when he overheard your crush in the boys' bathroom laugh with his friends at how stupid you were for still trying, even though he was obviously playing dumb to keep you going, making you look stupider.

hueningkai was pissed; at you for not realizing how you deserve better, at your crush for being the biggest douchebag you've ever liked, at himself for not being able to control his heart whenever you were near him, at the fucking WORLD for making his life this complicated.

but maybe patience is the best virtue, because when your crush just laughed at you in front of all his friends when you confessed to him, hyuka has never felt better satisfaction than punching the asshole straight in the face, over and over and OVER again. maybe he ended up in the principal's office with a bloody hand and aching fingers, but it didn't matter next to your (ex)crush's busted lip and bleeding nose.

and it especially didn't matter when you hugged him after he got suspended, because, in his mind, if you'd never love him the same way he loved you, he was still the sweetest boy you've ever met.

txt : masterlist

main taglist (hmu to get added!) : @koishua @navyhyuck @allegxdly @daystiny  @kdyism  @neotism  @bluejaem  @radiorenjun  @sleepylixie @oifelixcmerebrou @mrkcore @imdamnconfused  @sicluvz @abhirami20 @tyongishs @emvrd @brxght-world

I’d appreciate if you’d give me a little feedback on the drabble if you read, whether it’s an ask, a reply or in the tags of the rb! Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed!

[honkceasar]

Hi I have an absolutely insane amount of random ass pd headcanons that I’ve decided to unleash onto the world today so here’s part one of my insanity!!!

-Ashe plays guitar, can’t remember if this is canon or not honestly

-Will taught himself guitar after Ashe got possessed, tries to learn his favorite songs (absolutely CANNOT play my famed disappearing act, much to his dismay)

-Will collects and cures bones as a hobby, has a necklace with Henny’s skull on it and a couple bones from Vyncent’s world

-Ashe is that genre of autistic person that doesn’t make a lot of facial expressions, so the most uncanny part of the trickster is seeing these over the top expressions on her face that he personally would NEVER make

-William is a horrible driver because he has glasses and refuses to wear them (this is also why he doesn’t yell at Dakota to wear his, he’d be a hypocrite)

-William likes to sew but he’s so unbelievably slow at it. He wants to have like proper patch pants, but it takes him too fucking long to put that many on there so instead his pants only have a couple patches on them made with old jeans and fabric paint

-Vyncent would def do horseback riding as a hobby, he probably misses when he would do it at home

He’s also definitely brought the boys with him to do his horse girl shit

-Ashe is really good at drawing!!!! I feel like she’d be one of those people that has a killer marker collection but doesn’t use them that often cause he does digital art

-William is absolutely addicted to caffeine you can’t tell me he isn’t

-While Ashe was gone Vyncent took his beanie and William stole like all his fucking clothes. They’re all too big but he doesn’t care, nor does he plan on giving any of them back

-Dakota definitely has chew necklaces but they don’t last long cause he fucking destroys them

-Vyncent and Dakota both vocal stim so fucking loud dude (I can’t decide if I think Will does too because Charlie does irl or if William actually would)

-Dakota gets night terrors about Williams death

-Dakota struggles with reading but he likes audio books, he’d probably listen to some with Ashe’s headphones when they’re on a particularly long road trip. Idk what type of books he’d like though. I could see him liking the Percy Jackson series but I can’t explain why

-Vyncent’s one of those guys that wears layers no matter the weather and somehow never gets too hot

William also wears layers when it’s hot out but he’ll be sweaty as a motherfucker and like. Dying

-William was a tech theatre kid, definitely ran lights and got very specific about color washes

-Dakota used to be a babysitter before the hero stuff to make some extra cash, he’s always been good with kids

[capinejghafa]

Hi hello! I was wondering if you have some good Kanej fics to reccomend :)

I love your gifs btw, thanks for sharing your work!

Hi!!!! I'm going to do something weird, but stay with me anon lol I have made a gifset of some fic recs, but are no means a full list of ALL the fics I have read for (i would be here all day). So, this is a shameless plug, but the links for the fics are in the gifset!

think of this as a starter kit :) as this is by no means me trying miss anyone... i just read a lot lol

AU | Kanej | Fic Rec | were we meant to have a happy ending? (not in this lifetime)

if you're feeling sad :D

AU | Kanej | Fic Rec | roomy, and drenched in sunlight

Everyone loves roomy @whatanybodygets also has many other fics... but i can't gif the ballet one. sorry :(

AU | Kanej | Fic Rec | ghost maker

not 100% kanej but it does have nina and kaz accidentally bonding lol

AU | Kanej | Fic Rec | A Ghost Girl’s Guide to Ketterdam

one of my intro into @oneofthewednesdays amazing writing. read everything.

AU | Kanej | Fic Rec | The Four Seasons 

@totchipanda an absolute delightful person and the four seasons will be update eventually :D also, there might be more fics in this verse... maybe???

AU | Kanej | Fic Rec | The Bastard Saint Of The Barrel

Would also recommend The Etovost Plague.... not a sequel! But it's def worth a read if you like Grisha!Kaz. Bastard Saint is Healer!Kaz and Etovost is Tidemaker!Kaz. Would recommend if you're in a vibe.

AU | Kanej | Fic Rec | call it by name

will just say this is sad. this is very sad. BUT all of pyrrhlc's fics are sooo good. would also recommend latte art verse.

AU | Kanej | Fic Rec | Call from the Grave

I couldn't make a gifset of the Ballads verse lol but @linearao3 is absolutely a wonderful writer. Also very mature ;)

AU | Kanej | Fic Rec | All Kinds Of New Friends

AU | Kanej | Fic Rec | My Dearest Inej

same writer, not the same verse! A_nonnie_mouse and feelinglikecleo are writers for Six of Crows Modern AU Collection (Samples-verse)

non-gifsets:

if i loved you less / i could talk about it more by hyperspecificplaylists

Not finished but the way this takes you on a rollercoaster of emotions. The author also uses racebend characters :)

i carve a crow into your skin, and know that you have given me your heart by pbandjeremiah

listen, i have read this fic so many times and i have the most intense emotions i love it with my whole heart. the summary gives a lot away but for sure worth it!

also....

AU | Kanej | Married | Insp by Fic

mhmmm... ok, so i added this one because i personally love it lol @marycontraire is off writing for other fandoms... but gdi the Stories About Crows is actually one of my favorite soc series. if nothing else, i'm really grateful that it exists <3

[thisismeracing]

bono-schumi kiddo thots - godparents edition

once mick and bon’s f1 family find out they are expecting these people are pulling out their credit cards and buying every possible baby item they can set their hands on

kids mini mercedes car? delivered to their house

cute plush they saw at the store? in hand on the way to the register and holding onto it until they see one of them at the next race

the mercedes amg branded stroller and carseat? toto has shown up to their house in the middle of the night to hand deliver it (babe these are real products i just want you to know)

a shit ton of baby tommy hilfiger clothes that are unreleased? lew is folding them and putting it in the new wardrobe he bought for the nursery, before they even woke up (how did he get in?????? [he has a key])

a handmade crib that seb put hours of love into making? he’s setting it up while lew is folding the clothes

a collection of gina’s cowboy hats from her childhood? making space for them in the closet while lew and seb are doing their thing

and it isnt all monetary (even though they get enough items to fully furnish the nursery and have enough toys and clothes for at least another kid and didnt even have to worry about any of the other baby things because their village got it for them already) [seriously they didnt have to buy a damn thing]

like how susie has come over to either cook for them or drop off a dish she’s made

or how the kimi, nando, jensen, seb, lew, etc. come over one day to paint the nursery the color bon and mick have picked out but just haven’t gotten around to painting because of their busy schedules

or how while most of the guys who came over to help paint (how many of these fuckers actually need to be here in order to paint a single room one color?) val has made bon a cup of tea, and a cup of coffee for him to keep her company while mick supervises the painting session

or how lance and esteban will bring over fresh pastry around brunch time, to help in feeding the growing family

and it’s all a bit too much, but they don’t have the heart to tell them to stop so mick and bon just let their family shower their love on them

and bon is a little bit stressed about the whole “who do we put on paper so if anything happens to us they will be taken care of?” situation, but mick reassures her while they are cuddling in bed that there is no wrong answer and he will support whoever she wants to be godparents to their children, while kissing her gently and while sun fills the room they’re occupying

and they eventually land on a consensus

ellie’s godparents are susie and lew

because for one, little miss eloise is named after susie and lew is just so close to bon and she wants him in her daughter's life as much as he has been for her growing up

toto can be an unofficial godparent and i don't feel bad about that because he absolutely just slots himself into the role of grandpa right next to bono. [adding onto this nando absolutely gets called grandpa/abuelo because bon gets a good laugh each time nando reacts to hearing him being referred to as a grandpa.]

mikey’s godparents are gina a seb

seb because again this kid is named after him, but also because we cant leave seb out of being godparent. mick and bon would not let that slide. and then gina cause they also wont let gina not be godparent, and the fact she is mick's sister and bon's sister in law.

yeah people like lance and esteban are close to them, but these four they hold just a smidge closer. but not all is lost because they are very enthusiastically filling the roles of uncles for eloise and mikey. alongside people like val, kimi, jense, etc.

[okay i think im done, hope this made sense and you liked it <3]

☕️

I literally googled "mercedes amg branded stroller" bc I've never seen it before lol kinda cute, toto would def get them one of those

seb building a crib for baby bon is something I can totally see happening and it's such a dear thought to me*teary eyes emoji*

one hundred percent agree and love the godparents choice

[fuckentoastybitch]

My VN List!

I'm listing them according to ones I've played and ones I plan to play (as well as brief notes about either my opinion on the game or why I'm interested in them, formatted like this.)

This is for my own personal collection tbh, I just need to put them all in one place.

A. Have played:

The Arcana. Played since I was 16, all time favourite and Julian is my husband. This game shaped my interest for fantasy settings and magic. BUT! As a long time fan I must warn new players that trying to get the full experience for this game is difficult because of its coin system. The only reason I manage to keep playing for years is because I literally take a year's worth of breaks in between routes and logged in every. Single. Day. to collect coins and keys. It's literally been 6 years and I still haven't 100% the game yet cause I simply didn't have that kind of energy and time to do that anymore, but I still love the characters very deeply till now.

Blooming Panic. Second all time fave. Fell for Quest first, fell for Toasty hardest, for some reason is obsessed with xyx. I've revolved my entire personality around BP since 2023.

ERROR 143. Fun! Micah is technically not my type but I really like the general aesthetic and humor of the game. Iirc there are still more content to come to the game so I am very excitedly and patiently waiting.

3 Seasons. This was short and sweet. I think what I liked the most about this was the unique character designs, especially Rye and Briar's. I heard the dev's are working on more content on the current LI's + Briar's route, I'm really excited for those.

Our Life: Beginning & Always. Our life was INCREDIBLE, to put it simply. The entire game and story was very well thought out that it even made me reflect on my own life at each phase along the game. It gave me a really strong sense of nostalgia and reminded me of my own feelings during every change I had experienced. I actually wanted to make a whole post about OLBA but I got busy and already forgot everything I wanted to say, ehe. I still have to play the DLC and get the remaining locked CGs though.

Assignment Due: Project Blue. THIS GAME IS ADORABLE. I already made a blog post about what I like about it and I will again emphasis on how this game felt like it was made specifically for me. I love Asher so much aaaaa. I heard rei, the dev is working on another game for Eden, I'm looking forward for that, too.

Coffee Talk. Coffee talk was so so good! I need to play more non-romance VNs too cause this was so enjoyable in terms of its storytelling, setting, gameplay and design. Every character had such a nice story that tied up nicely, even the MC who's supposed to be just an observer throughout the entire thing. Also the cozy vibes and music is a 10/10 would recommend.

A Date with Death. This one's so cute too! I played only one route last year and just picked it up again recently. I have only one route left to finish and the new DLC!. Anyways yes the Grim Reaper is very babygirl I can attest to it.

seekL. THIS IS SO GOOD. SO SO GOOD. If you didn't see the one week phase where I basically went insanely obsessed with seekL, you missed out. Hacker man save me.. save me.. hackerman..

B. Want to play:

Lost in Limbo. Really pretty art and interesting concept. The theme seems very fantasy/magic centric which really pulls me in. But this game is still a WIP iirc

When The Night Comes. Technically I'm currently playing this one, but only the intro and hadn't touched the game in months cause I've been busy. Again, the fantasy setting caught my interest aaand I just met Ezra but I already love him. Will continue this as soon as I can!

Infinite Blue. I've played the demo! Very mysmes reminiscent lol. The game looked very cute so far and Brooklyn reminded me that I'll never run away from my old man liker allegations. It's already out so I def gotta play it soon.

Coffee Talk Episode 2. Don't really need an explanation for this one except that the new characters I've seen so far looks really cool.

Tavern Talk. D&D inspired Coffee Talk! If it's not obvious already, I LOVE fantasy settings so even though I've never played D&D, it is right up my alley and I wish I could play it someday. I've been eyeing the production of this game for a while so I'm really excited that it's finally out!

Obscura. This one looks really REALLY cool but I haven't actually read into what it's actually about. The art alone looks good enough to get my attention. Really curious about it, I hope I'll play it soon.

Intertwine. Just from looking at the 2023 Otome Jam entries overall I thought this one looked most visually appealing to me. I love the color scheme, and the aesthetic reminds of the string of fate myth (that probably is the theme)

DATA BR<3ACH. I'm usually not a fan of cyberpunk setting but this one seemed pretty intriguing to me visually!

Innerlog. By Jenny V Pham! I enjoyed Error 143 so I have no doubt I'll enjoy this one too.

Andromeda Six. My impression of this one is "space D&D" lol. I can't believe I haven't played this one yet.

TOUCHSTARVED. I can NOT believe only the demo is out cause the quality looks like it should've been a long existing popular franchise. One thing I'm a little hesitant about playing this game is because it's goth themed and in case you haven't noticed, a lot of the media I like have a softer, more pastel aesthetic. lol. But that's a personal preference and yet I definitely need to play it sometime soon.

Cupid's Chatroom. There's really not much to say. Pink aesthetic? Mysterious chatsim that appeared out of nowhere? My cup of tea 100%

Na Daoine Maithe. I've played the demo of this one and it is sooo interesting. I like myths but I've never really read into Gaelic ones. The art is so pretty and the story so far is very intriguing. I can't wait for the full game.

Swiped!: Double Shots of Love. FINALLY AN INDIE VN WITH OLDER MALE LOVE INTERESTS DFKJFDSJKD I played the demo, it was really really cute! The professor LI was made to call me out lol

Wake Me Up If You Need Me. A game made by rice! Someone who I've seen around in the fandom and who's really talented at making songs and audios. I had no idea they made a game but I just found it recently and I have to play it.

Keyframes. It looks really good but I'm interested mostly cause I found out Charlatean (Toasty's VA) is in this kjsdhfgkjd

Rekindle. I follow the lovely artist that's creating it and the DEMO IS OUT!. I saw one (1) art of Jules and he is EXACTLY my type so I'm already looking forward to this game.

Our Life: Now & Forever. Baxter's OL game! I already loved Cove's so I'm really really interested in this version of the game. Plus, I actually really like the autumn aesthetic compared to Cove's beachy style.

Hummingbird's Crown. Has a very interesting premise: a time loop mystery. I'm definitely interested in this one for its story potential rather than the romance, I love me a good mystery.

Aaand that's it. Thankfully "( – ⌓ – )

There's actually a few more that I added in my twitter bookmarks but those are relatively new and I haven't decided if I really want to play them yet. I'm following the devs though so that interest might grow over time. These lists are long enough as they are already, haha.

[sorryimananti-romantic]

i've been reading fanfictions and online novels for so many years (too many really) and for a very long time there was one common event or phenomena within the writing community that i never experienced myself: finding that ONE fictional novel that you will never let go, whose plot just will not leave your mind and you come back to reading it over and over again like you're a broken record.

most of my time in the recent weeks was spent commuting across country and when's a better time than to read fiction all by my lone self? trains, busses and bustling fading into the background and acting as a form of white noise. (blame it on growing up with ghibli)

tldr; i've picked up Horizon again lol

and i wanted to once again come here and extend all and every compliment towards you for writing (the entire series tbh!). it doesn't get old and it has once again sent me down an endless spiral of emotions even when i already know how it ends. how my adoration for the characters continue to grow is a mystery even to myself. and it's amazing how with every read-through, i find more and more clues and details to complete the bigger puzzle that i hadn't even picked up on during my first reads.

gotten so bad that i'll see the word Horizon, listen to the actual song Horizon and i can not stop myself from thinking about horizon!san and gaeul (also neve my baby).. google, can you be downbad for a fanfiction? asking for a friend.

getting lost in thoughts again and distracted by this universe, i have yet to bring up why i'm even writing this essay lol

after collecting my thoughts and my notes (and rambling a friend's ear off about the series and the universe and more..) i believe i have found that ONE fictional novel that i will never forget about and know will always end up coming back to - which is Horizon ♡

there's not much more to say other than just that, if i'm quite honest (otherwise we'd be here all night and i'm not willing to test if asks have a character limit lol)

but i do know that unless readers verbalize their thoughts and feelings for a piece of writing, the writer will never know the impact they might have had on someone else with something they wrote by themselves without expectations to reach such great distances and touch so many hearts (definitely mine). writers might be masterminds but even they can't read minds through a screen. (i hope..)

also as i am writing this, what a humorous coincidence that it's been exactly one year since the release of Horizon :') <33 happy one year ♡

all the hugs and kisses to you yumii 🩷 ○ chron

chron- 😭 first and foremost let me apologise bc i went to check if horizon really turned one year old today and foound your lovely feedback reblog that i. missed.???????? HOW DID I MISS THAT?? but also nice time discovering it bc after reading this ask and feeling some sort of way (emotional asf is what it is) i went on to read the reblog and i-

look, i'm really not an emotional person but i had to physically stop take a breather drink some water I DON'T CRY MUCH BUT THIS. THIS MAKES ME CRY 😭😭

and secondly, i love you so much 😭😭 your presence here and feedback and the encouragement and everything literally means so much to me you have no idea how good i'm feeling right now 😭 (be replying to the reblog on horizon soon btw i have no idea how i missed that gem)

i'm honestly beyond honoured. i don't know if you know but take me home/horizon lore is so so precious to me! it's literally my baby and i'm ngl i live in that lore. you'll catch me randomly thinking about it and coming with potential ideas for the future if i write another installment (honestly want to for every member one day) but horizon being that ficitonal novel for you? i'm clutching my heart rn 😭❤️

we're both ghibli kids hehe it's def been a solid influence on my imagination! ghibli movies were literally the first ones that i watched i'm glad my dad got me cds of them without having any idea what they were LMAO but the influence is there and i'm happy to find another ghibli enthusiast <3

and omgg finding more details on the sec read? ahaha that's lovely to hear :') i love how the fic horizon is now an additional with the song horizon for you hehe and neve, ugh. everyone's baby daddy neve :')

i'm honestly so thankful that you took the time to send this message, that you feel this way (and the reblog lord it's making me cry i'll reply to it soon too bc wow.) take me home was my first fic and i have no idea how i came up with the story (covid times, vacation, and first time worldbuilding was a dangerous combo lmao) and i honestly had zero plans for another installment in the lore but so many take me home san enthusiasts kept me engaged even long after take me home ended. thus horizon was born- i needed to do san justice after hinting that he and yena might have been sth.

horizon is my baby. i think horizon is one of my favs because i was ngl a big brain with how i extracted points from take me home to create the premise for horizon. like it's the most unplanned planned thing i've ever written? if that makes sense. i had a hard time coming up with twists but everytime i connected some event of horizon back to take me home i would literally evil smirk LMAO and i'm so glad you enjoyed it so much! it makes me feel proud that i wrote it 😭❤️

as you can tell i can talk about the lore forever. it was so fun to plan and write it and to find someone who appreciates it so much? literally in shambles rn. and to find this message and that reblog on the one year anniversary? god, i wish i could tell you how i'm feeling rn 😭❤️

again, thank you from the bottom of my heart! if i ever find the time to write another installment in that lore (idk if many will read it tho lmao but i could literally write another series for you) i think i'll def come to you for brainstorming :') i know the next one is going to be woo x darkling or yunho x some ice-user faerie (with more neve features bc they literally can't do this without him anymore LOL) and ahh i should stop writing now you're literally making me want to drop everything and start writing this ahaha

[jq37]

I'm really glad you've seen Starstruck, because it means you have the context for this. Every disastrous decision made this episode, were THOSE the stupidest things these people have ever done? I thought 'my farts smell awesome' was the lowest they could go, but look at that, they collectively found another layer beneath that. This has to be the biggest L the Intrepid Heroes ever took. Outside of a TPK, losing a Mcguffin is as rough as it gets. The RNG giveth and the RNG taketh away.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

OK, now that I have that out of the way, holy hell that last episode took a full year off my lifespan I think. Murph saying that it was like Fabian's Bad Day on a loop was right. I've never watched an episode of a ttrpg and thought, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" so consistently. Even after watching the Adventuring Party I'm not 100% confident I understand what some of those moves were about. I am going to try and break down by thoughts on each interaction, roughly in order from least to most baffling to me.

*Red and the Beast*

If this was as crazy as things went, it would have been a pretty normal episode. I fully understand why Ylfa would want to talk to the Beast being a monstruous princess and all. And Emily's side-motivation of wanting to maybe get some potions that would help them travel without freezing to death made sense as well. Sure it was a little awkward, but in the way that all pre-teens are sort of awkward around people who they think are cool. She didn't spill any serious beans or burn any serious bridges. This one gets a pass from me. 

*Ger and Elody*

It probably feels like I'm ranking this pretty low. And I am if we're talking in pure terms of cause and effect. Because loudly and weirdly spilling the beans the way that he did was a TERRIBLE move tactically and DEF alerted the princesses to their plan. BUT I wasn't CONFUSED about why it happened. Ger had a thing to do that made sense--find out if his wife was in on the erase everything plan and fill her in if not/try to convince her to switch sides if so. He had a reason to get frustrated and do something stupid. This was, in my eyes, a good plan that went poorly because of bad dice rolls and Murph's commitment to character. So while it was VERY unfortunate, I'm not actually confused about why the desperate frog man who is known for being awkward was weird and awkward to his wife in a dire situation so it didn't really frustrate me in the same way that some of the other scenes did. We also got one of one only pieces of new information in this episode--that it doesn't seem like Elody is in on the plan (though with his trash Insight rolls, who even knows). I wish he'd taken Roz with him to back up his story right away (and give him advantage of dice rolls). I also wish he'd brought Roz with him so she wasn't able to do her own solo mission. Speaking of...

*Roz and Snow*

This is not a conversation that needed to happen tactically. I was like, why is this going on? Just because everyone is having a little chat doesn't mean you have to have a little chat too. I will admit that by the time I got here, I was feeling so much second hand cringe that I missed a bit of the conversation. But I do know that Roz told Snow that she told the entire group about their chat and that they were fine with it. WHY TELL HER THAT??? The plan was clearly told to Roz with the understanding that it was for her ears only. Why immediately be like, "So I talked it over with the squad..." You're showing your hand! You're telling Snow you're not really aligned with the Daughter's of the Crown. If you were going to talk to Snow, why not try to figure out what the actual plans are wrt the erase the world endgame? They really don't know anything about the specifics of the plan. Just some nebulous talk about spilling ink. Why is no one asking questions about this? How are they supposed to stop a plan they don't understand?  Anyway, I think this conversation didn't need to happen and while it wasn't as disastrous in effect as Ger's convo, his had a good reason for happening while I don't think this one did which is why it frustrated me more. 

*Pinnochio and Cindy*

OK so this one frustrated me a TON because it had so much potential for getting information and moving the story forward but that's not what happened at all! As a sidenote, I was surprised but excited when they showed up at the castle and the Snow Queen fight was already over offscreen because I was like, "Man! We're going to get so much good information next episode!" Haha, nope! This conversation started off really strong with Pinnochio saying that they're kinda step-sibs which I thought was a great opener and something I hadn't really considered. I thought he was going to maybe bring up how the stepmother's goal seems to be fucking with stories (in a similar way to what they want) and seeing how she reacts. Or maybe following the thread about how she ALSO feels like she doesn't have agency in her story because she's a puppet of a narrative without even a name. And I don't want to assume but seems like Brennan was giving him the opening to go there like when Cindy was talking about "her own story" and Pinnochio was like, "She doesn't have one" Cindy seemed willing to talk down that thread but it was dropped really quickly. And this whole conversation had such a dissonant vibe where it was like Cindy was in Crown of Candy and Pinnochio was in Fantasy High or even Starstruck in terms of seriousness. Which, from a comedy standpoint, was extremely funny but from a narrative standpoint was like, Pinnochio...I'm begging you...please...ask her one direct question. Lou said he was playing up Pinnochio's childishness because he's a child in a weird situation which, sure I guess. But man. It was a very funny scene but not very narratively fulfilling.

*Pib and Cindy and a Window*

Pib readying the horses? The most competent move of the session! Pib unilaterally deciding to try to push her into her book? Why???? Like, OK. I wouldn't have told her about the book if I was Pinnochio--at least not without consulting the group. BUT once the proverbial cat was out of the book, why not let her have it? It might give her some perspective she doesn't already have and you might be able to sway her into being an ally. I feel like Cindy and Snow while true believers in the plan, aren't beyond reason. They don't strike me as gung ho about the entire situation. They give me the energy of people who are exhausted and on their last resort. I honestly feel like there is a world where this is all salvageable if they'd let her have her book without going full hostile. Maybe it's not the most LIKELY option. But I think there was a chance. But nope. Initiative. Even if they'd gotten her in, what's the next move? You're in a palace full of her allies and none of you have rolled more than a ten all session! Were you going to hold her hostage and run? Like, bruh. If they wanted to leave, they should have just left! Why did they make a whole production about it? I swear, they stayed in the castle the exact worse length of time. Not long enough to get any info, but too long to leave gracefully. Anyway, I thought this was a wild decision to just make. 

*Princess Interlude*

This isn't a part of the breakdown. This is just something I wanted to talk about. We really don't know how much the princesses know about The Situation and that's a big piece of the puzzle for us to know how BAD of a plan this is with the info they have. Because one of the few things we learned this episode is that Cinderella is surprised that the Stepmother doesn't have her own book. If they think that each person has their own book and they can write themselves out of existence without it affecting anyone else then this is actually a suicide pact and not a murder-suicide pact which still isn't GREAT but it's not WORLD ENDING which is decidedly less selfish. I still think it's an insane thing to try without having a full understanding of their world but if you're only playing with your OWN lives, then that's your right. 

And wrt to the PCs, since they were spilling the beans left and right, why not be like, cool. Ink spilling. Great plan. Now what about the Auroratory?  Because their stories don't just exist in ink. They're oral tradition, baby. I'm sorry you don't like your lives but ink spilling isn't going to solve everything. 

Finally, I need to go back to past episodes where the princesses are lamenting to be sure, but I'm honestly not 100% sure what it is they're so distressed about. There is an element of fighting for free will but I'm not sure what it is they think they don't have control over. Because surely if they had no free will, they wouldn't be able to fight their stories at all, right? And if it's just that they're stuck with all their memories from all their lives, Witches do that all the time, right? Can they just not handle the Everything, Everywhere, All At Once lifestyle because they're not inherently magical and they're cracking under the pressure? From what I remember from the previous episode, it sounded like Cindy and Snow were distressed over the *existence* of dark versions of their story which is why they wanted to destroy everything completely. But also, isn't darkness just a thing you have to accept if you're going to have free will? And also, I don't know that it makes sense to destroy the entire world just because there are timelines where bad things happen (especially when the worst things don't even happen to them). Who awakened these princesses in the first place? Based on the introductions, we're led to believe it's Cindy and Snow who were the first ones, but now that we've met Rapunzel, I have my doubts. And speaking of her, back to the list.

*Tim and Raps*

Tim what were you THINKING?????????

God, where to begin. Ally said they weren't sure if Raps was in on it or not two APs in a row which is baffling to me because I thought Brennan telegraphed it pretty hard that Raps was both very clever and very fake. We first hear about her trying to deceive the Baba Yaga (one of the SCARIEST NPCs who even DEATH doesn't fuck with) and getting away with her tongue intact. Then, on a really high insight check, the party learns nothing about her, except that she's so shiny you can't really read her. Suspicious as hell. THEN, we learn that she has hair that's everywhere that can potentially be used to spy on people. And when she describes murdering the Snow Queen, she says it in the most politician-y, obfuscate-y, side-stepping culpability way possible. YEAH. I THINK SHE'S IN ON IT. I am floored that it wasn't obvious that she was full team nuke everything. The twist to me would be if she was secretly GOOD. I was wondering if the was the actual mastermind, I didn't even realize we were discussing whether she was IN ON IT.

But like, OK. That aside. Whether you are going in thinking she's good and misled or fully in on it, THIS WAS AN INSANE WAY TO HANDLE IT.

DIRT IN THE SHORTBREAD???? TIM!!!!!!

If she's GOOD and just awkward from how she was socialized you're being weird and aggro to her. 

If she'd BAD and being manipulative you're being super clumsy and antagonizing her. 

AND THEN SHE STOLE THE BOOOK!!!!!!!

My heart SUNK when Brennan revealed that. Like, GOD I didn't think that could have gotten worse and then it did. 

And it's made worse because this is 100% a conversation that didn't need to happen. If I walked in and Raps was there, at most I would ask her about how her hair worked so we maybe knew for tactical reasons. That's not a crazy question to ask a person with magic hair that's everywhere so she wouldn't necessarily have a reason to be suspicious. And then guess what? I'm GONE. Just, based on second hand embarrassment and mechanical effect (LOSING THE BOOK), this is by far the worst conversation all episode and that's saying something.

(Also, RIP Mira who's going to wake up to a VERY different situation than when she went to sleep.)

The last thing I want to say about this episode is I kind wish that either Roz or Ger or both had died in their rescue plan. Not as a punishment mind you. While it was a tactically bad move, I think it's totally in character that Ger would have tried to go back for his wife and that one of his friends would have joined him. But we haven't had that many deaths this season and I feel like some more death exposition might give us more about what's going on. Because I feel like we only have a small piece of the puzzle, and there's not that many eps left to go. You know how in Stranger Things, the plot always ends up split between three groups and none of them actually know what's going on until they all communicate in the penultimate episode? That's how I feel right now except it's the PCs, The Princesses, The Faries, and the Librarians.

It's also potentially illuminating for Elody if the princesses are willing to kill Roz and Ger (I assume they'd bring back at least Roz). And if they were split up from the main party, that's an interesting place for them to be story-wise.  (Also, if they brought back Ger but were like Elody he's in the dungeon, don't talk to him he'll fill your head with lies. But she visits him anyway, just like when he was a frog at the pond...but I'm just writing mental fanfic now.) My point is there was potential there for us to get interesting info (and story beats) there which is why I was kind of rooting for it. This whole episode was a big bust with regard to moving towards any sort of goal and they really just made their situation severely worse to no real end. And now the princesses who want to end the world have the most powerful device in all of story. 

Yay. 

(Coda: Where is Scher with her "We're real enough" energy to talk the princesses out of their spiral? For the love of story, I am losing my mind here.)

[5eraphim]

eras of tumblr i could give hour-long Ted Talks about

(only including eras i participated in, not what i’ve lived through second-handedly. these are what i personally remember seeing on my dash, i’m sure there’s plenty i missed. This is an ongoing list/not fixed/subject to future edits.)

2015 gravity falls 

the rise of sexyman bill cipher 

depravity falls and putting 12 yr old characters in violent guro situations 

alex hirsch worship

billdip discourse

the diehard thirst for Gruncle Ford 

“i want to fuck that dorito”

2015/16 Black Butler

SebaCiel discourse

Grelle discourse (like, i don’t even know how to elaborate, but if you were there you would remember how people were fighting over her characterization in all different directions. Which is funny because, love her or hate her, she is barely even in the show lol)

The needlessly intense sjw vs anti-sjw/ fiction doesn’t effect reality/ shipping fighting

can’t quantify this, but i swear 80% of the fans were ex-hetalia fans 

Black butler 2 being either loved or hated, while book of circus was almost unanimously loved

the Scott Freeman incident...

no one giving a fuck about the female characters

Yana/Jay Michael Tatum worship

2016 Undertale

Sans undertale sexyman rise

the most raw video game soundtrack of all time

papyton

no one agrees how to draw undyne, but we all agree that she’s gay as fuck

(This is a personal anecdote, but i actually made a friend in highschool bc i drew undertale fanart on the board at latin class nd she added to it the next day, i added to it the next day and eventually we met up and it was so adorable)

“get dunked on”

2016-17 hamilton, heathers, great comet, dear evan hansen, be more chill musical theater insanity

rip tumblr user galactibun

The Hamilton craze breathing new life into the 1776 musical fandom

Most bizarre fanfic aus seen on tumblr thus far (hamilton)

The great comet Tony snubs

BMC and DEH blowing up, despite most fans only caring about the characters, totally ignoring the plot.

“Miku binder Thomas Jefferson”

No one giving a fuck about “The Hamilton Mixtape”

Gatekeeping fans who didn’t read war and peace or the ron chernow biography (i don’t think anyone ever gave a shit about the BMC orginal book which is SO FUNNY)

lin manuel miranda worship

real people fanfictions of actors/shipping them (especially hamilton!)

Key Figures include: Lin Manuel Miranda, Ron Chernow, Philipa Soo, Daveed Diggs, Ben Platt, George Salazar, Barette Wilbert Weed, and Mike Faist

2016-2017 the yuri on ice, killing stalking, kaikyu yaoi trifecta 

Yaoi take over

The anime fans collective salt over YOI winning anime of the year 2016

Not in this time period, but the Killing Stalking fans despising the ending en mass several years later.

Free! was also huge as the second season concluded not long before, but wasn’t receiving new updated in Realtime like the other three.

honestly? i mostly just remember people drawing some of the most beautiful fan art of the characters and not bothering to follow the plots

2015-2016 steven universe discourse peak craziness 

There are no words, looking back this all feels like a fever dream

Insane fan-theories (as in- even for Tumblr, these theories were very out there)

Pink diamond character derailment

“watching steven universe is the opposite of eating pussy” 

Gemosonas

fusion = sex???

“it’s over isn’t it” single-handedly inspiring some of the most beautiful fan art to come out of the show; "Stronger than you” def inspired much more fan-creations, but they were nowhere near as good imo

That terrible lily peet video that sent a tidal wave of fandom-fighting 

Concrete

Nicki Minaj guest appearance 

the porn avalanche predating the 2018 nsfw ban

My OG account got banned >:( (i never posted porn, tried to email support to no avail, I DID NOT DEVERVE THIS YOU NARCS)

50-50 mix of people posting lewd art and people posting links to find them as they migrated to twitter

“Female presenting nipples”

The return of the citrus scale (orange: PG/G, Lime: PG-13, Lemon: R, Grapefruit: X)

“Too Spicy for Tumblr”

Didn’t even stop the porn bots, mostly just screwed over artists and writers

IMO the peak of user v staff animosity

2020 hannibal

The small but loyal anthony hopkins defenders

Some of the most beautiful creative gore art

The moodboard to web-weaving pipeline

People being surprisingly respectful of fans who only watched the show, or who didn’t read Red Dragon/Silence of the Lambs, or where otherwise not invested in the greater overall Hannibal canon.

Manipulate, mansplain, malewife

Key Figures Include: Madds Mikkelson, Hugh Dancy, Anthony Hopkins

november 5, 2020

You just had to be there man, i don’t know what to tell you.

Key Figures include: Donald Trump, Castiel, Dean Winchester, Joe Biden, Vladimir Putin, Nevada, Georgia, Wisconsin and debatably Sherlock season 5

the 2021 coquette girl blogger era

Lana del rey worship

The ungodly amount of softcore porn

Gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss

Glorification of eating disorders, benzos, trailer parks, predatory men, age gap relationships, and so much more!

Teenagers blogging about Russian lit you know they never read

Waifblr

Still not sure to this day how much of this was ironic and how much wasn’t?? Or if any of this was self-aware???

Yes babe you’re so bambi, kate moss, diet coke, wellbutrin, dasha nekrosova, ballet, klonopin, trad cath, fawn, dior, sofia coppela, can you please shut the fuck up now?

key figures include: Lana del Rey, Daisy Randone, Dasha Nekrosova, Nina Sayers, Fiona Apple, Anya Taylor Joy, Sylvia Plath, Kate Moss, Kirsten Dunst (probably so many more, but this is just off the top of my head)

(bonus)

2015/16- My personal earliest memories of really getting into tumblr, and witnessing the tail-end of the Hetalia reign

2016- the end of Homestuck

2016- the epidemic of overwatch porn

2016- Does Jumin Han is gay?

2017- RWBY’s nosedive in quality from season 3 to 4, losing the majority of the fanbase

2018 Boyfriend to Death civil war (Gatobob v ElectricPuke)

2018- Detroit become Human drops and the robot-fucking gatekeeping 

2018- the Game of thrones/Endgame joint disaster ending melt down

2019- Sub-par Omens

2020- the Dead by Daylight community rioting when Pyramid Head’s ass got nerfed

2020- Cyberpunk 2077 is released and is torn apart almost instantly. Looking back by my approximations post were made up of- 10% people who were actually playing the games and enjoying themselves, 20% people who were playing the game and WEREN’T having fun, 55% People who never bought/played the game who were making up crazy glitches for clout, 15% hardcore pornography of characters you’d never seen before. (I’m quite salty about this bc I worked at GameStop at this time and had people constantly talking about glitches in casual conversation and I just know most of these bitches were LYING.)

20??- don’t remember the exact dates, but phase 3 marvel was un-escapable at this time

2020/21- Succession blows up

2022 Ghost bc blows up on tiktok, the fandom already sizable on tumblr only goes up from here

[yourqueenb]

I do think it's worse in the mystery books. The cheap pandering smut books like Surrender, TNA, Untameable, etc. may have stuff like the +Desire/Forbidden/Dom/Sub points and the collectible BDSM items but at least those don't really pretend to have an influence on the story. And because these are cheap pandering skut books, we can expect them to be super linear (granted, books like TNA and especially Surrender should be easy to make non-linear stories, but you get my point).

But with mystery books? They treat the clues as important to the story. And naturally those sort of clues should be important and have effects. But they're not. Mystery stories should be the kind of stories that are more flexible and fleshed out. We expect better from murder mystery stories than we do their dollar-store YA smuts, and rightfully so. So it's all the more unnecessary and frustrating when they turn out to be linear.

No, I see what you mean. And like I was saying, I def agree with you. But I wasn’t really referring to the steamy romance books when I said our choices don’t matter in any of their stories. (I mean yes, they are included in that statement and the writers could add different branches to those as well if they actually wanted to make an effort because, as you said, it shouldn’t be that hard. But also like you were saying, no one really expects that atp).

The fact of the matter is though, that our choices haven’t mattered in most books. Of the 100+ books/series in their catalogue, I’d argue that our choices made significant differences in maybe 10% of them. And while they’ve been on this smut kick for a while, there are still newer books in other genres that really could’ve benefited from story branching and were disappointing because they didn’t have any. TPA being about spies is one of them (although it had several other issues as well). And I think it was @choices-binglebonkus who made a post about how our choices should’ve had much larger effects in WTD being a part of the zombie apocalypse genre.

Now whether it’s worse with mystery books is another thing. And I’m honestly inclined to agree with you there as well because the clues and such are so important to the story as you pointed out. So we should have branches for finding/missing out on important information, focusing/not focusing on certain relationships, etc. But at the same time, I’m not sure if the illusion of choice is what makes the mystery books more unsatisfying and frustrating or if it’s something else. Because although it’s very annoying, they could still write a good mystery without continuing consequences, different endings, and what not. And a lot of the time, their mysteries aren’t lackluster because we have no choices that matter, but because again the story/plot itself is unbalanced in some way

[gaybd1]

Please explain this crush situation, it sounds like good drama!

lmao I don’t think?? I’ve posted about it before but it’s not THAT interesting I promise

also SO sorry but Due To The Autusm I don’t know how NOT to make this a Long Story

let’s see…

so the thing about communities of expats/immigrants/foreigners is that there are ALWAYS people coming and going but for a while here I had a really tight group of friends I met through work and we did EVERYTHING together. We’ll call them J, N, and B. All around my age. J was a guy from Canada, N an American guy, and B a South African girl.

N, bless his soul, has always been the most OBVIOUSLY gay guy but has wayyyyy too much internalized homophobia to deal with it so compensated by being wayyyy too into women, you know? But also he had a collection of 300 perfumes and reviewed them on YouTube lol so

ANYway he was in one really weird relationship with some girl we never even got to meet for a while and then he met Z, who started hanging out with all of us. She was always so great and they were so cute together.

So eventually J (the coolest guy, we always watched hockey together) moved back to Canada and N and Z left to go work for the summer on a ranch in the US. The tentative plan was for N to stay there because he’d always been very vocal about hating Taiwan but Z was gonna kind of play it by ear. I figured they were gonna get married, they’d already been together a couple years and had a very strong relationship

Anyway idk what happened but the minute N stepped back on American soil, his inner asshole started to show. He just became this horrible annoying person I didn’t really want anything to do with, so I haven’t talked to him much since.

I kept in touch with Z who was having a terrible time with him. He all of a sudden broke up with her in a REALLY shitty way and she moved back here. Then he moved to like Bolivia or something idk.

So then Z, B, and I were still here. B is always busy or super depressed (no judgment) so I hardly ever see her, so Z and I started hanging out alone.

It was a LITTLE awkward at first bc I only ever hung out with her through N?? But actually we got along so great and hang out as much as we can now

That’s cool, that’s fine, but I started feeling this attraction to her and this chemistry between us that suggested it… could? be mutual?? Like there were definitely signals, especially the time we went through the haunted house together wow

We had a couple discussions that were like “okay so I guess we’re both technically pretty pansexual” so it would hypothetically work ((I DO strongly id as gay but my attitude is anything’s possible u know?))

A while after that I invited her to an open mic I was performing at and sang girl crush about her asfjljdzhk

Then we had a discussion where she was basically like “I don’t date friends” which is super fair but also we still weren’t talking about us specifically

Anyway that was several months ago and my feelings have def toned down since then (also her work schedule sucks so we don’t see each other that often) and like. idk I’ve done this once before about having a crush on someone I got in super well with and then missing my chance (that person ended up dating our other friend and they’ve been together like 5 years now rip) but this also isn’t something I’m super active or serious about right now????

[whovianwholikesgirls]

For You Self Ship Asks:

what’s your funniest or most embarrassing memory together?

what inside jokes do you share?

describe your f/o in 6 words or less

would you rather go to their world, or have them come to yours?

the most random thing you associate with your f/o (foods, shapes, even textures! anything that’s not an obvious)

Okay I’m def answering for Spence for these bc he’s my husband duh but also the first question made me think of Jonathan so I’ll add my “side piece” as @itsfreakingbats deemed him and I affectionately refer to him now to the answers too

Funniest or most embarrassing memory together

Jon: when Steve attempted to drop his camera onto the concrete after picking on him for the pictures of Nancy. (Yes Steve was in the right bc he was protecting his girl but I had to protect my “best friend” too. All of season 1 we were just pinning lol) I caught the camera before it hit the asphalt of the parking lot, handed it to Jonathan, then punched Steve in the face. Then we had to run to the car 😂😂😂😂

Spence: after we said I love you for the first time, I had the smart idea to prove and science knowledge to him and try to flirt. Bad idea. I made the worst jokes in the history of jokes by saying,“so I’m guessing you’ve got a lot of dopamine and oxytocin in your system right now?” He laughed and kissed my forehead. I wanted to die.

Inside jokes:

Honestly? We don’t have any. We have plenty of core memories, pet names, favorite ways to show affection, and favorite ways to spend time together. We don’t have inside jokes tho. These will be fun to add to canon at some point

Describe them in six words or less:

Spence: devoted, comforting, DRIVEN

Jon: a sneak peek of a fic that’s over 8k words and still needs more scenes that I’ve been working on for months, like since at least this last summer, I’m determined to finish this year:

The fastest way to get out of Murray’s place was up the stairs he just went through and there was no way they were going to let that nosey little hermit see how his words affected them, no matter how right he was.

Well, mostly right.

They would use words far more eloquent than “babe magnet” to describe Jonathan: steadfast, pulchritudinous, and altruistic were among their favorites.

Would you rather them come into your world or go into theirs

Spence: both🙈when I want him all to myself I’d rather him come into my world but if I miss the found family vibes of the BAU, which I’d more often then not, I’d go into his

Jon: a magical ST AU without the upside down because I want to be in his world to hang out with all the characters and to see REM and Nirvana live, but without the stress of the monsters. El obvs still needs her powers and meets the OG party but the actual upside down isn’t a threat. Basically that’s all gone and Brenner and everyone and his lab go to jail for experimentation on children. Yay happy ending

Random things that remind you of them:

Spence: most people would say the obvious, books, vinyl records, doctor who. All of those things are correct but a raise you the color olive green. It’s always been one of my fav colors but it just looks so good on him I love it even more

Gifs for reference https://www.google.com/amp/s/undertheniall.tumblr.com/post/626721895783546880/amp

Jon: oh boy I have a list

Cars bc he’s fucking hot when he drives

Black denim jackets bc of the iconic one in seasons 1 and 2

Waffles and pancakes because I just know he makes the best ones

It’s canon in the fandom that he’s the fan of the cure so the cure makes me think of him too but he also canonically has an REM poster in his room in season 1. *screaming* they’re one of my favorite bands of all time thanks to @anything-thats-rock-and-roll introducing me to him. It’s only natural order of things that REM fans are also fans of U2 so Jay and I both HC he’s a fan of U2 in my AU too

Both of them: converse!!! I have a collection myself and I’ve loved them since I was a kid but now when I wear a different pair depending on my outfit I automatically feel closer to my boys 🥰

Thanks for these!! They’re seriously making my entire week 😍🥰❤️

[journal-69]

6/3/2024

6:22 pm I kinda forgot to do this for a few days, I either spent too long getting up in the morning and forgot or was rushed and didn't make the time to sit down and write. Either way that's okay, it hasn't been a crazy couple of days. On Friday only one friend showed up for Gaga night, and while I was a little disappointed because I got tons of snacks it was still fun. On Saturday I did a gaga dance class with a friend, not Lady Gaga but more shamanic energy release vibes. I was a bit late for the class and it was a veryyyy bizarre thing to walk in on but after I was able to get comfortable it was an amazing class. It was all about free movement and focusing on when and how much you are moving. It was also nonstop so it really got the body working.

After I dropped them off at the train I ran into a boy I'd been trying to plan a date with so we had a spontaneous moment and ended up walking around a lot, we walked all around Soho, the village, and the Lower East side. It was a cute vibe, he was sweet and in the end it was a fun random thing to end up stumbling into. After that, I came home for a bit and relaxed before I went up to help one of the boys I met last week with photos. He then came over, we made out, and he left to go to a friend's party. I spent my evening mending a shirt and after the party he came back over to stay the night. I could tell neither of us were getting much rest. He was fidgeting all night and because he was fidgeting I wasn't sleeping. We fucked a few times through the night but to be honest it was just fine, a little too quick for me to really get into it all.

Sunday I was exhausted and a bit depressed so I spent most of the day in bed. I didnt do too much early in the day but talked to my roomie a bit, which is nice when we actually do, I miss being her friend. In the evening I got anxious so I walked from Williamsburg to Chelsea to my friend's place to be there for a pickup for a pres thing and after that, I headed back home and did some more mending. It was a chill and secluded Sunday which was needed, though I did run into three people I knew while in the East Village on my walk.

Yesterday was definitely more challenging mentally, I think hooking up and not getting any sleep kinda had that effect on me but I really was trying to not let it overtake me.

So finally we get to today. I've been struggling with momentum to get up in the morning again so I was a bit late to get up. I'm gonna try this week again to stick to my alarms and make myself get up. I ended up preparing and pleating the fabric for a skirt I'm working on which took a good few hours, altered a pattern for a new design, and made a list of things I need to get done for my collection. I kinda just snacked on crap all day, I think I am gonna try to find a way to eat less sweets or smn cause I've been craving them a lot. I also want to actually make the move to work out more, with the stuff I have been doing with my friend, yoga and dance, I am def getting somewhere but I think I gotta work on my strength and all that other fitness stuff. I want to feel healthy in my body and see those results. Anywho to round out the night I'm getting din/drinks with my longest friend who I haven't seen in a while which will be a nice moment to connect cause we've both had so many changes!

I think tomorrow I'll be a lil more emotion and less timeline, sometimes you gotta just write down what happens.

[wheeboo]

OMG UR A CHOIR GIRLIE TOO ?? I'm also in our school choir 😭 we've won many competitions too <3 it's so fun !! and in our choir since me n my friends are the " seniors " we actually practice 30% of the time and the rest is just singing random things skssjsj 👐🏻

even though im in the choir .. my most listened tracks are by hhu 🧍🏻‍♀️ and like the most wild shit u can find 🙏🏻 mingyu girlies r insane 😊💪🏻

and my day has had a good start ! ofc because u replied :P but I've been up for 3hr now ? And i got in 2hrs of studying already so we r slaying 🙏🏻 wby !! what's ur plan for 2day ^3^

- yuyu 🎀 유유

OMG CHOIR GIRLIES UNITE 😍😍 and omg that's so cute :(( competitions and events were so fun in choir aaa it was def like a family when i was in it,, i miss it a lot </3 and YES girlie can show off that senior privilege i love that for you 💅💅

BDDSJFDS WELL 😭 we all got different tastes so its completely understandable BAHAHA. and yes. mingyu girlies are INSANE. like the entire fandom can collectively agree abt gyuldaengies JDFKLDSJF still love all of you guys tho <3 (the non-toxic ones ofc 😙😙)

are there any non-kpop artists that you iisten to?? :)

and glad you're having a good start to your day so far !! and gIRL don't make me blush rn you're so sweet :(( you're prob the only anon who has been consistently talking to me in a long ass time since all my other anons have... disappeared off the face of the earth i think LMAO. OKAY I SEE YOURE ONE OF THOSE PPL IN SCHOOL ARENT YOU 🤨 jk i'm very proud that you got studying in hehe cuz i'm doing same rn too JDLKFSDF. thing is tho i kinda have a raging headache rn but i gotta grind on some bio homework 😔💪 mainly my fault tho my sleep hasn't been that good recently 😭😭

[cabeswaterdrowned]

ask game:

tsc (i’m sorry i always ask about them, my brainrot is strong and i love hearing your thoughts)

and community

don’t apologize pls lol I also am brain rotting hard and have few people to talk about it with so it’s appreciated :)

The Shadowhunter Chronicles

M/F OTP: there are others I really like or love in a more normal way, but Emma/Julian Will/Tessa and Jem/Tessa are the ones that hit on another level for me emotionally, I’m clinically insane about them. Also it’s a bit hilarious to think about, since this was formative media for me (I first read TID in late elementary/middle school and TDA as they were coming out in high school) how my taste in ships generally speaking was shaped… like if you look at pairings I gravitate towards in other fandoms since there are def patterns xd. The impact!

Other M/F ships I have love for (including this category because ik i don’t talk about them as much and in another fandom where I had less dynamics I’m super fond of to choose from I could have placed them in that first category think of them as like second tier Otp’s for me ): Mark/Cristina, James/Cordelia, Simon/Isabelle (last one also was formative they were thee hot girl/soft boy nerd ship to me in middle school. But it has been a while so unsure if they’d hit the same on reread, they are the tmi couple I would most like to see in the better in black collection though!)

M/M OTP: Jem/Will! And then follow up Kit/Ty Surefire ways to get me invested in a ship: they do necromancy together, meet cute with a knife to the throat, they break up without ever dating. Triple check.

F/F OTP: along those lines it’s Lucie x Grace literally the main reason I want to reread TLH (well I do also just want to see how it reads back to back and not broken up and I have other reasons but like. Those are less important) is to be able to properly write fic about them, like it genuinely pisses me off this fandom is so boring and tasteless I can’t believe I actually miss the legacies fandom they were annoying as hell but at least they understood that when women do dark magic together it’s polite to write detailed analysis of how gay they are 😭. The way I know cc has seen Buffy too like flop. Also it just fits archetypes of antagonistic femslash I tend to love in general see: Julia/Marina Aria/Alison Elena/Rebekah and more

OT3: Herongraystairs and then Kierarktina

Friendship OTP: Tessa & Magnus + Will & Magnus! And for familial relationships I adore all The Blackthorn siblings in TDA and their dynamics but especially Julian and Mark’s relationship is v compelling to me and I also love Cordelia and Alastair’s relationship v much it was my favorite overall development in TLH. And then for psuedo familial dynamics I Love Charlotte’s relationships with Tessa Jem Will and Jessamine. her relationship with Jem might be my softest spot overall especially because they have moments in CP2 that make me go 🥺 but as a documented Tessa lover I adore how having Charlotte as a mentor figure effects her arc. So those are my favorites Ik I failed at picking just one. Oh I also adore Emma and Cristina’s friendship although I also sometimes ship them romantically

Canon OTP: Blackstairs Wessa Jessa like I said

Crackship OTP: what even counts as crackship? I will admit that during my CP reread I did look up how many Will/Magnus fics there are on ao3 although I did not read them (there are 12 for inquiring minds).

Anti-OTP: The worst ship to me is Jordan/Maia but it’s been a long time so the vitriol has worn off and I don’t have another solid notp besides them but the other canon pairings I’m #unimpressed with are Clace Ghostwriter and Gracetopher … Lucie/Jesse probably irks me the most these days because I actually want to like them because the concept is so good but the execution falls flat for me and I really like Lucie and want someone more interesting for her (like Grace lol.)

Community

M/F OTP: ultimately when I’m actually watching the show it’s Jeff/Britta love their emmaxknightleycore vibes. But I did get really into Abed x Annie at one point and even wrote some fic about it over quarantine (when I first got into Comm) so I have a soft spot for that concept too

M/M OTP: Troy/Abed. They of course are The otp of the show.

F/F OTP: not really otp status but well I did write this Annie x Britta Carmilla Au: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27728689?view_adult=true

(I orphaned that account post quarantine)

OT3: Troy/Abed/Annie

Friendship OTP: I mean all the study group dynamics but I especially have soft spots for Annie and Troy + Abed and Britta moments

Canon OTP: Jeff/Britta

Crackship OTP: what even counts as crack …

Anti-OTP: I just don’t like Jeff/Annie I used to viscerally hate it these days I’m just like. It’s not for me lol.

[inkandpen22]

Dazed and Confused (S1: 1/?)

Pairing: Steve Harrington x Female!Reader 

Warnings: mild langage and violence 

Word Count: 3.8k 

Part Summary: A year after the original Demogorgon attacks, Y/N struggles in secret to cope and remain to be the popular cheerleader she once was. Her growing feelings for Steve, her best friend Nancy’s boyfriend, is another secret she’s keeping. 

Masterlist

The sweet sound of Def Leppard can’t even make this early Thursday morning any less dreadful. Most days I wonder why I continue pretending as if everything’s just peachy when things haven’t been normal in this depressing town in over a year! Everyone, the kids, Steve, Nancy, Jonathan, Hopper, even Joyce is acting as if nothing happened! Her own son was possessed by an alien monster but apparently, everyone’s forgotten! 

I stare in my rearview mirror, out the outside I appear almost identical to how I did last fall. This isn’t me. I haven’t been to me in a while. A piece of me died when that monster tackled me to the Byers’s floor and left this horrendous scar on my forearm. Yet, I can’t act broken. I’m Y/N Goodwin. I’m supposed to be the perfect little head cheerleader who has everything put together. For a while, I truly did. Now, I pretend. 

Walking into school with fake confidence, I’m greeted with smiles and cheerful ‘hellos’ by various people. My Walkman drowns out my taunting thoughts. On the outside, my life must seem so simple, at least it’s predictable each day. 

I suddenly feel a tug on my arm. Nancy appears beside me with a mischievous smirk, which is never good. 

I remove my headphones with a giggle. “Oh no, you’re up to no good,” I tease my best friend. 

“Kind of, you know the party, Tina’s?” 

I snicker, “who doesn’t? Personally, I can’t wait!” 

She interlocks our arms as we shuffle through the crowded halls toward our lockers. “What do you think of going as?” She asks, yet again, because I haven’t been able to decide. 

Despite the horrors of my real life, Halloween remains my favorite holiday. I take my costume very seriously. It takes a lot of consideration. 

“It’s a surprise,” I tell her, much to her dismay. 

Upon arriving at our lockers, only two apart, Nancy continues her spiel about the costume plans she made with Steve. She goes on about how all of our friends will be there and how much fun it will be. It’s true, everyone will be at this party. It’s been the talk of the school for weeks. I could really use a good party. To have a night where we can act like reckless teenagers again will be nice. 

“Morning ladies,” Steve greets with his usual charming grin as he pops up behind Nancy. 

The cute couple exchange whispers, likely gushy compliments. Anything and everything that’s fluffier than a Care Bear. It’s hard to believe they just saw each other last night. One would think they haven’t seen one another in centuries. Appears I have to remind Romeo and Juliet that other humans exist. 

“Morning Harrington,” I smirk as I gather my things from my locker. 

The two lovebirds part upon hearing me. Nancy bashfully collects her notebooks for our first few classes but Steve wears a proud grin. 

“And how are you today, Miss Goodwin?” He questions in an attempt to wiggle his way back into my good graces after last fall. 

He doesn’t have to try, he already is. 

“Fine, and yourself?” 

“Excellent now that I’m with you two,” he winks. 

Always the flirt, even with his girlfriend right beside him. 

“We were talking about Tina’s party,” Nancy fills him in. “Y/N here, won’t tell me what she’s going as.” 

Way to throw me under the bus Nance. 

Steve narrows his eyes at me with curiosity. “Anything I would recognize?” 

“Likely,” I answer vaguely. 

“Do you need a ride? We can pick you up on the way,” he offers kindly. 

As much as I would love to sit in the backseat while Steve and Nancy gawk at one another. I sadly have already made arrangements. 

“Actually I’m going with Tommy and-” my eyes travel past Steve for a moment and I thank the heavens for it. My attention is locked on the stud who graces this otherwise depressing hallway. Tall, lean, and utterly glorious. His hair reminds me of Jon Bon Jovi's and he wears an earring. I'm so fucked. “Who… is… that?” I mutter in a whisper to my friends. 

Nance and Steve follow my line of vision behind them. Soon, they spot him as well. I’ve never seen tighter jeans on a guy and I’m all for it. 

“Who cares?” Steve dismisses the stranger without a second thought. 

I, for one, care. I would gladly show him around if he needs it. I’ve been known to be welcoming and very friendly. 

“Y/N?” Steve tries to snap me out of this daze. 

I hum absentmindedly, too enthralled by this new entity. As my focus remains on the boy, out of the corner of my eye, I see Steve swift his gaze between me and the handsome stranger. That’s when Mr. New Guy meets my stare. His eyes pierce my soul. They’re crystal blue but their pupils are nearly nonexistent. A sudden chill courses over my skin. 

“Y/N!” Steve grips my shoulder. 

I finally return to Earth and meet Steve’s gaze as he leans down to my level. He expresses this discouraged look as if I've just stolen something from him. 

Suddenly, the warning bell rings and it allows me to dodge any questions from him or Nance. 

“What? He’s hot!” I justify, shutting my locker. 

Steve releases a soft chuckle and shakes his head in disapproval. He knows I can’t help it. Besides, we’re equally flirtatious, it’s in our DNA. 

It’s electric, the interaction I had with the new kid. He’s drop-dead gorgeous, there’s no doubt about it. What’s strange is the way Steve looked at me while I was admiring the new Greek god. He appeared almost disappointed. It’s peculiar, I can’t get the image of it out of my head. 

As Steve and Nancy talk about whatever, the stranger passes us by and I catch a glimpse of the back of him. I’m not disappointed. 

“Him!” I blurt out to my friends, capturing their attention. “I’m showing up to the party with Tommy and them but I’m leaving with the new kid.” 

Nancy laughs, “you’re impossible.” 

“I’m determined,” I correct her as I walk that glorious bodywork. 

I have officially found a way to fill my time and distract my racing mind. It just so happens to be one of my favorite kinds of pass time, boys. 

_______________________________________

After school, my duties as captain of the cheerleading squad keep me occupied. We practice in the gym with the basketball team. One, because it’s too cold out now that it’s October. Two, it means I can sit on the bleachers. Three, I can get to gossip with Nancy as we both watch Steve and now Billy practice. Yes, I found out the name of Mr. New Kid and any possible details I could manage. In fact, I figured out his name during homeroom. He’s all anyone is talking about. The girls love him and the boys envy him. 

After I change into my practice uniform, I exit the locker room, heading into the gym to join my team. 

Oddly, Nancy hasn’t shown yet. Usually, she beats me to the bleachers. 

As my girls slip in and start to warm up, I watch the boys prep for practice. On the bench, tying his shoes, Steve seems rather off. He has all day. He’s not his usual happy-go-lucky, wild, and energetic self. 

“And who might you be, Baby?” A husky voice says behind me. 

I stop to turn around and I come face to face with none other than Billy himself. 

Tilting my head to the side ever so slightly, I can’t help but gaze at his perfect features. “Y/N,” I inform him confidently with a curved grin. 

He glides closer effortlessly and without shame, leaving very little space between us. “Pretty name,” he compliments, obviously glancing down at my lips. “Name’s Billy,” he tells me what I already know. Unexpectedly, he gathers a strand of my hair and tucks it behind my ear. Boy, he’s good. It’s annoying how good he is. This is going to be easy. “You have the most beautiful gray eyes…” he compliments quietly between us. “Has anyone ever told you that?”

“Yes, actually.” Steve suddenly interrupts, stepping between us protectively. “And they’re not gray, idiot. They’re Y/E/C, They just look darker indoors."  

Steve’s interjection frustrates me but his analysis has me taken aback. How does he know my eyes so well? I mean, they’re obviously not gray but he’s awfully specific. 

“There’s also mixed with a little gray,” Steve elaborates. “Well… depends on which one you’re talking about. They change all the time depending on the lighting… but then again the right one has this strip of just gray and-” 

“Whatever Harrington,” Billy cuts him off with a wicked chuckle as he gets in his face. “Just know I’m going to steal your girl here just like I’m going to steal your spot on this team.” Billy shoves Steve in the chest like a petty child. 

"Hey! Relax!" I’m starting to question my fondness of him. I scoff, “not his girl by the way.” 

“Just friends,” Steve adds under his breath. 

Billy grins and eyes me up and down, “perfect.” 

I scoff in disgust at his obvious action. 

He jogs off across the court to join the other boys, leaving Steve and me alone. 

Surprisingly, Steve stands quietly with his back still to me. After that whole thing and he has nothing to say about it? He described every little detail about my eyes so nonchalantly as if just anyone would know them as well. 

I lean against the wall next to him. “Are my eyes that interesting?” I joke in an attempt to break the ice. 

He runs his hand across the back of his neck and stammers nervously. It’s a rarity to see Steve Harrington so fidgety. “Eh, I see you every day. It helps that they're pretty, makes them easy to remember. Don’t feel bad if you don’t know mine,” he assures me over his shoulder before jogging off. 

Hazel.

There’s the Harrington I know, dismissing everything and playing it down. He acts too cool for school. Yet, the last bit rubs me the wrong way. The self-consciousness of it isn’t him. 

“You think mine are pretty?” I shout, before he gets too far to not hear me.  

He pauses, glancing over his shoulder with a smirk. "Beautiful.” 

There he is back to himself. The relentlessly flirtatious part of him that makes me grin ear to ear like a kid in a candy store. There’s my friend. 

Before turning over his shoulder he sends me a cheeky wink, causing me to snicker. Always the charmer, Harrington. 

I return my focus back to my team, only to find them chit-chatting like this is Social Hour! 

“That’s it! We’re running drills!” I shout at them. 

Each of the girls groan and I think some of the freshmen are going to cry. Clearly, they don’t understand how serious I am about being the best team in our conference. I’m borderline dictator but I prefer the word perfectionist. 

_______

“Yeah, no probs! Catch ya later,” I hang up the phone. 

Nance called me hysterical after dinner with Barb’s parents. I suppose I just shut off the memories. I’ve tucked away any reminisce of Barb from my life in hopes that it would help me move on. The nightmares are haunting enough. 

If this torment consumes my days as it already does my nights, then, what’s the point of trying to act normal anymore? I already feel insane. I put on a brave face for everyone else. I act as if I’m the same person I was a year ago. Though, in truth, it’s all a facade, a coping strategy for the fact that I have no idea who I am anymore. 

Now settled in my pajamas, I turn up the volume of my Walkman as I try to distract myself before going to bed. I lay on my stomach on my bed as I skim through Teen Beat and drown out my thoughts with Queen. I’ve found that if I listen to uplifting music and catch up on some gossip magazines then the nightmares are not as intense and realistic. If I’m lucky, I wake up the next day not remembering them but that’s rare. 

My peace is disturbed when I feel something grab my ankle. Startled, to say the least, I flip over and scoot back to get away from the entity. Relief rushes over me as I realize it’s Steve. He towers over my bed with his hands up in surrender. My heart pounds rapidly as I struggle to slow my breathing. I yank my headphones off. 

“The hell Harrington! You gave me a heart attack!” I whisper yell, making sure not to wake my family. 

He sighs, turning around to shut my window that I assume he climbed in through. “Sorry,” he apologizes as he settles onto my bed with his head on my pillow. “I’m having a rough night and I didn’t want to go home quite yet.” 

Seeing the defeat expression on his face, I start to let go of my frustration to be here for my friend. It doesn’t take a genius to guess this is likely about Nancy and the dinner. Steve cares a lot about Nace, and I mean a lot, so whatever she feels so does he. He lays with his hands interlocked over his stomach and I sit up criss-cross beside him. It seems to me he is in need of one of our infamous heart-to-hearts. 

“Is it Nancy?” I mutter, afraid it may upset him further. 

He snickers, “that obvious, huh?” He stares up at the ceiling, avoiding meeting my eye. 

I shrug, “not terribly, she called earlier...” 

“Oh,” he nods and meets my gaze, “so you know…” 

“Only her side. Yours may be different.”

“I don’t know,” he exhales defeatedly. “We just haven’t been the same lately… She’s… She’s different. I’m different. Ever since…” he hesitates, likely for my sake. 

“Ever since last year,” I finish, swallowing hard. 

“Yeah…” 

There’s a silence that falls between us. Neither of us particularly enjoy speaking of last November. 

“How are you holding up?” He checks in. “With everything, I mean…” 

“Fine,” I hurry out, playing down the situation. “Really good, actually. As well as anyone could be in this situation. And you, how are you? Really.” 

“Handling it… for Nancy’s sake," he shrugs, focusing on his fingers as he picks at them. "I have to be strong for her so she feels like she doesn’t have to be.” He tells me what I already know. His face and actions tell everyone he’s perfectly alright but in his eyes, it’s evident there’s something wrong. 

I sigh, “But Steve, that’s no way to cope with it all. You’re only human. You can’t be perfect all the time.” 

“Well I don’t see you-” he pauses and raises a brow, meeting my gaze. "Wait, you think I’m perfect?” 

I roll my eyes and nudge him on the shoulder, “that’s beside the point!” 

He chuckles. 

I shake my head disapprovingly but can’t suppress my laughter. “What I mean is, it’s okay to be kinda traumatized,” I assure him. “We did experience something horrid and alarming.” 

“You speak very poshly, you know that? Sound very adult.” He points out playfully. 

“You’ve told me before,” I remind him with a bashful smile as I peer down at my hands, playing with my scrunchy in my lap. 

He places a gentle hand on my knee. “You can talk to me, Y/N. You know that right?” 

I nod, unable to answer verbally without breaking my tough persona. If I look him in the eye and say in the slightest that I’m terrified every day then the rest will pour out of me. 

Steve is my best friend, other than Nancy of course. We hated one another when we first met. Everything changed last fall when he came to my door, terrified because he couldn’t find Nancy. We went to search for her together and ended up at Jonathan Byer's house. It was all very weird. I would've never thought I’d ever step foot in that house. That’s when we stumbled into an attack from the Demogorgon. I got tackled by that alien monster and Steve whacked it in the face with that nail bat of his. I hadn’t even noticed it clawed my arm, I was so in shock. Steve freaked out when he spotted the gash while we were watching the kids. He immediately took me into the bathroom and bandaged me up. Since that night, we haven’t gone a day without talking. It’s funny how some friendships begin. 

“Eh, enough of this pity party!” Steve perks up as he climbs off of my bed. “How about we watch a movie? I’ll even settle with The Blue Lagoon this one time because I know it’s one of your favorites!” 

“Aw, you know me so well!” I giggle, he's not wrong. 

He walks over to the light switch by my door and turns off the lights. If I were alone, the night light would be plugged in. I used to hardly be afraid of anything. Now, I’m afraid of basically everything, including the dark, except when I’m with someone else, especially Steve. It’s comforting being with someone because I feel protected. Frankly, I despise being alone. 

Having been in my room hundreds of times, Steve knows exactly where I keep the VHSs on my bookshelf. I get settled under the covers as he pops in the movie. He keeps the volume low to avoid waking my parents. Honestly, he could mute the movie and I would still know word for word what they’re saying. 

Steve kicks off his shoes and takes off his jacket before climbing in next to me. He gets settled, fluffy up the pillows behind him to rest against my headboard. He tucks one arm behind his head as I flip onto my side, propping my head in my hand. 

We’ve had plenty of movie nights. Over the summer, we were obsessed with The Karate Kid. We may have seen it over a dozen times. We would quote it nonstop! For those few weeks, we felt normal again. We were staying out late doing teenager things. Our minds were at ease. 

“So cheesy!” He groans quietly about the movie knowing it’ll get to me. 

“It’s romantic!” I playfully argue. 

“I’ll give it to you, Brooke Shields is hot but that’s about the only good thing I can say about this chick-flick.” 

I gasp and peer up at him. He wears a pleased grin and I can’t help but laugh. “Chick-flick? It’s so not a-” 

He raises his eyebrows, signaling for me to rethink my statement before I say it. 

I give in, “okay yeah it’s a chick-flick.” 

“Thank you, I told you so,” he mocks, rather pleased with his win. 

I roll my eyes jokingly, refusing to add to his well-off ego. 

As the movie goes on, my head falls back onto the pillows, I start to get sleepy. Thankfully, tomorrow is Friday which means the weekend and Tina’s party. Perhaps, if we’re lucky, we’ll feel like normal teenagers again. 

I shut my eyes for a second, feeling safe and secure with Steve next to me. His warmth and presence ease my mind immensely. For the first time in what feels like forever, I feel at peace. 

I can’t believe I got dragged here with no other than Steve Harrington, the biggest self-centered jerk of all time! Nonetheless, I have to get my best friend and his beloved girlfriend out of this shit hole. 

“What the hell are you doing here Nance? Let’s go!” I try to reason with her. 

“Get out of here!” She yells, “Y/N, just go!” 

Okay, um, bitch! I didn’t miss The Facts of Life for this bullshit! 

I cross my arms over my chest and grant her the death glare. “You don’t want to leave? Fine by me! Steve, let’s go!” I spin on my heels and head toward the door. 

The idiotic Christmas lights scattered all over the shack of a house start to flicker which makes Jonathan and Nancy lose their shit. 

“He’s back!” She screams. 

“Everyone get together!” Jonathan demands. 

“What? Why? What’s going on?” Steve actually listens to them. 

As if I’m going to listen to that freak! It’s going to happen! I’m going home! I have practice tomorrow and I can’t be late! 

“Y/N! Get over here!” Jonathan orders. 

He has the audacity to command me? He’s about to have a rude awakening here in a minute. 

I whip around to address the asshole. “Watch it, Byers! I’m in no mood to-” 

There’s a loud bang behind me then a severe, piercing, pain strikes my spine. I fly forward onto the carpet with a grunt. A force flips me over onto my back and I’m faced with a mouth full over razor-sharp teeth. I scream at the top of my lungs and attempt to scoot out from underneath it. 

Its large claws clench my arm, pinning me to the floor. 

The pain is so sharp it makes every ounce of breath leave my lungs. For a moment, my body is stiff and my eyes begin to well up.

Suddenly, the monster disappears from above me. The vision of the Byers's cream ceiling comes into view.

"Take that, asshole!" Steve grunts, knocking the Demogorgon again, this time into the hallway.

Endless gunshots and shouting fill the air. All three of them disappear from my immediate sight. Their voices are muffled around the corner and all I can do is stare up at the damaged ceiling with blurry vision. Slowly, my head inches to the side to catch a glimpse of the stinging I feel. All I see is red on what was once a yellow-like carpet.

“No! Stop!” I fly up from the bed panting, gasping for air. 

“Hey, hey, hey!” A voice shouts. 

My room is pitch black and I can't see a thing. I begin to panic. I can't see! It's here! It's here! 

Arms fling around my body, enclosing me. I fight them off, terrified that it's the Demogorgon. 

“Y/N! Y/N!" Steve cups my face, making me look at him. "You're okay!"  

He guides my head to my chest, pulling me into a hug. 

I grip the fabric of his shirt in my fist, sobbing into his neck. “I can’t do this anymore!” I cry, finally breaking down after a year of keeping it together. 

He brushes his hand down my hair and shifts closer to me. “You’re safe. You’re okay. I’m here. I’ve got you," he whispers. 

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