#ask any of my partymates and they will tell on me

[jq37]

I'm really glad you've seen Starstruck, because it means you have the context for this. Every disastrous decision made this episode, were THOSE the stupidest things these people have ever done? I thought 'my farts smell awesome' was the lowest they could go, but look at that, they collectively found another layer beneath that. This has to be the biggest L the Intrepid Heroes ever took. Outside of a TPK, losing a Mcguffin is as rough as it gets. The RNG giveth and the RNG taketh away.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

OK, now that I have that out of the way, holy hell that last episode took a full year off my lifespan I think. Murph saying that it was like Fabian's Bad Day on a loop was right. I've never watched an episode of a ttrpg and thought, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" so consistently. Even after watching the Adventuring Party I'm not 100% confident I understand what some of those moves were about. I am going to try and break down by thoughts on each interaction, roughly in order from least to most baffling to me.

*Red and the Beast*

If this was as crazy as things went, it would have been a pretty normal episode. I fully understand why Ylfa would want to talk to the Beast being a monstruous princess and all. And Emily's side-motivation of wanting to maybe get some potions that would help them travel without freezing to death made sense as well. Sure it was a little awkward, but in the way that all pre-teens are sort of awkward around people who they think are cool. She didn't spill any serious beans or burn any serious bridges. This one gets a pass from me. 

*Ger and Elody*

It probably feels like I'm ranking this pretty low. And I am if we're talking in pure terms of cause and effect. Because loudly and weirdly spilling the beans the way that he did was a TERRIBLE move tactically and DEF alerted the princesses to their plan. BUT I wasn't CONFUSED about why it happened. Ger had a thing to do that made sense--find out if his wife was in on the erase everything plan and fill her in if not/try to convince her to switch sides if so. He had a reason to get frustrated and do something stupid. This was, in my eyes, a good plan that went poorly because of bad dice rolls and Murph's commitment to character. So while it was VERY unfortunate, I'm not actually confused about why the desperate frog man who is known for being awkward was weird and awkward to his wife in a dire situation so it didn't really frustrate me in the same way that some of the other scenes did. We also got one of one only pieces of new information in this episode--that it doesn't seem like Elody is in on the plan (though with his trash Insight rolls, who even knows). I wish he'd taken Roz with him to back up his story right away (and give him advantage of dice rolls). I also wish he'd brought Roz with him so she wasn't able to do her own solo mission. Speaking of...

*Roz and Snow*

This is not a conversation that needed to happen tactically. I was like, why is this going on? Just because everyone is having a little chat doesn't mean you have to have a little chat too. I will admit that by the time I got here, I was feeling so much second hand cringe that I missed a bit of the conversation. But I do know that Roz told Snow that she told the entire group about their chat and that they were fine with it. WHY TELL HER THAT??? The plan was clearly told to Roz with the understanding that it was for her ears only. Why immediately be like, "So I talked it over with the squad..." You're showing your hand! You're telling Snow you're not really aligned with the Daughter's of the Crown. If you were going to talk to Snow, why not try to figure out what the actual plans are wrt the erase the world endgame? They really don't know anything about the specifics of the plan. Just some nebulous talk about spilling ink. Why is no one asking questions about this? How are they supposed to stop a plan they don't understand?  Anyway, I think this conversation didn't need to happen and while it wasn't as disastrous in effect as Ger's convo, his had a good reason for happening while I don't think this one did which is why it frustrated me more. 

*Pinnochio and Cindy*

OK so this one frustrated me a TON because it had so much potential for getting information and moving the story forward but that's not what happened at all! As a sidenote, I was surprised but excited when they showed up at the castle and the Snow Queen fight was already over offscreen because I was like, "Man! We're going to get so much good information next episode!" Haha, nope! This conversation started off really strong with Pinnochio saying that they're kinda step-sibs which I thought was a great opener and something I hadn't really considered. I thought he was going to maybe bring up how the stepmother's goal seems to be fucking with stories (in a similar way to what they want) and seeing how she reacts. Or maybe following the thread about how she ALSO feels like she doesn't have agency in her story because she's a puppet of a narrative without even a name. And I don't want to assume but seems like Brennan was giving him the opening to go there like when Cindy was talking about "her own story" and Pinnochio was like, "She doesn't have one" Cindy seemed willing to talk down that thread but it was dropped really quickly. And this whole conversation had such a dissonant vibe where it was like Cindy was in Crown of Candy and Pinnochio was in Fantasy High or even Starstruck in terms of seriousness. Which, from a comedy standpoint, was extremely funny but from a narrative standpoint was like, Pinnochio...I'm begging you...please...ask her one direct question. Lou said he was playing up Pinnochio's childishness because he's a child in a weird situation which, sure I guess. But man. It was a very funny scene but not very narratively fulfilling.

*Pib and Cindy and a Window*

Pib readying the horses? The most competent move of the session! Pib unilaterally deciding to try to push her into her book? Why???? Like, OK. I wouldn't have told her about the book if I was Pinnochio--at least not without consulting the group. BUT once the proverbial cat was out of the book, why not let her have it? It might give her some perspective she doesn't already have and you might be able to sway her into being an ally. I feel like Cindy and Snow while true believers in the plan, aren't beyond reason. They don't strike me as gung ho about the entire situation. They give me the energy of people who are exhausted and on their last resort. I honestly feel like there is a world where this is all salvageable if they'd let her have her book without going full hostile. Maybe it's not the most LIKELY option. But I think there was a chance. But nope. Initiative. Even if they'd gotten her in, what's the next move? You're in a palace full of her allies and none of you have rolled more than a ten all session! Were you going to hold her hostage and run? Like, bruh. If they wanted to leave, they should have just left! Why did they make a whole production about it? I swear, they stayed in the castle the exact worse length of time. Not long enough to get any info, but too long to leave gracefully. Anyway, I thought this was a wild decision to just make. 

*Princess Interlude*

This isn't a part of the breakdown. This is just something I wanted to talk about. We really don't know how much the princesses know about The Situation and that's a big piece of the puzzle for us to know how BAD of a plan this is with the info they have. Because one of the few things we learned this episode is that Cinderella is surprised that the Stepmother doesn't have her own book. If they think that each person has their own book and they can write themselves out of existence without it affecting anyone else then this is actually a suicide pact and not a murder-suicide pact which still isn't GREAT but it's not WORLD ENDING which is decidedly less selfish. I still think it's an insane thing to try without having a full understanding of their world but if you're only playing with your OWN lives, then that's your right. 

And wrt to the PCs, since they were spilling the beans left and right, why not be like, cool. Ink spilling. Great plan. Now what about the Auroratory?  Because their stories don't just exist in ink. They're oral tradition, baby. I'm sorry you don't like your lives but ink spilling isn't going to solve everything. 

Finally, I need to go back to past episodes where the princesses are lamenting to be sure, but I'm honestly not 100% sure what it is they're so distressed about. There is an element of fighting for free will but I'm not sure what it is they think they don't have control over. Because surely if they had no free will, they wouldn't be able to fight their stories at all, right? And if it's just that they're stuck with all their memories from all their lives, Witches do that all the time, right? Can they just not handle the Everything, Everywhere, All At Once lifestyle because they're not inherently magical and they're cracking under the pressure? From what I remember from the previous episode, it sounded like Cindy and Snow were distressed over the *existence* of dark versions of their story which is why they wanted to destroy everything completely. But also, isn't darkness just a thing you have to accept if you're going to have free will? And also, I don't know that it makes sense to destroy the entire world just because there are timelines where bad things happen (especially when the worst things don't even happen to them). Who awakened these princesses in the first place? Based on the introductions, we're led to believe it's Cindy and Snow who were the first ones, but now that we've met Rapunzel, I have my doubts. And speaking of her, back to the list.

*Tim and Raps*

Tim what were you THINKING?????????

God, where to begin. Ally said they weren't sure if Raps was in on it or not two APs in a row which is baffling to me because I thought Brennan telegraphed it pretty hard that Raps was both very clever and very fake. We first hear about her trying to deceive the Baba Yaga (one of the SCARIEST NPCs who even DEATH doesn't fuck with) and getting away with her tongue intact. Then, on a really high insight check, the party learns nothing about her, except that she's so shiny you can't really read her. Suspicious as hell. THEN, we learn that she has hair that's everywhere that can potentially be used to spy on people. And when she describes murdering the Snow Queen, she says it in the most politician-y, obfuscate-y, side-stepping culpability way possible. YEAH. I THINK SHE'S IN ON IT. I am floored that it wasn't obvious that she was full team nuke everything. The twist to me would be if she was secretly GOOD. I was wondering if the was the actual mastermind, I didn't even realize we were discussing whether she was IN ON IT.

But like, OK. That aside. Whether you are going in thinking she's good and misled or fully in on it, THIS WAS AN INSANE WAY TO HANDLE IT.

DIRT IN THE SHORTBREAD???? TIM!!!!!!

If she's GOOD and just awkward from how she was socialized you're being weird and aggro to her. 

If she'd BAD and being manipulative you're being super clumsy and antagonizing her. 

AND THEN SHE STOLE THE BOOOK!!!!!!!

My heart SUNK when Brennan revealed that. Like, GOD I didn't think that could have gotten worse and then it did. 

And it's made worse because this is 100% a conversation that didn't need to happen. If I walked in and Raps was there, at most I would ask her about how her hair worked so we maybe knew for tactical reasons. That's not a crazy question to ask a person with magic hair that's everywhere so she wouldn't necessarily have a reason to be suspicious. And then guess what? I'm GONE. Just, based on second hand embarrassment and mechanical effect (LOSING THE BOOK), this is by far the worst conversation all episode and that's saying something.

(Also, RIP Mira who's going to wake up to a VERY different situation than when she went to sleep.)

The last thing I want to say about this episode is I kind wish that either Roz or Ger or both had died in their rescue plan. Not as a punishment mind you. While it was a tactically bad move, I think it's totally in character that Ger would have tried to go back for his wife and that one of his friends would have joined him. But we haven't had that many deaths this season and I feel like some more death exposition might give us more about what's going on. Because I feel like we only have a small piece of the puzzle, and there's not that many eps left to go. You know how in Stranger Things, the plot always ends up split between three groups and none of them actually know what's going on until they all communicate in the penultimate episode? That's how I feel right now except it's the PCs, The Princesses, The Faries, and the Librarians.

It's also potentially illuminating for Elody if the princesses are willing to kill Roz and Ger (I assume they'd bring back at least Roz). And if they were split up from the main party, that's an interesting place for them to be story-wise.  (Also, if they brought back Ger but were like Elody he's in the dungeon, don't talk to him he'll fill your head with lies. But she visits him anyway, just like when he was a frog at the pond...but I'm just writing mental fanfic now.) My point is there was potential there for us to get interesting info (and story beats) there which is why I was kind of rooting for it. This whole episode was a big bust with regard to moving towards any sort of goal and they really just made their situation severely worse to no real end. And now the princesses who want to end the world have the most powerful device in all of story. 

Yay. 

(Coda: Where is Scher with her "We're real enough" energy to talk the princesses out of their spiral? For the love of story, I am losing my mind here.)

[supercantaloupe]

@dimension20alphabet​ prompt fill #6: Flowers

title: A Little Fall of Rain - campaign: Fantasy High: Sophomore Year - 1882 words - set post-fysy

Aelwyn learns a new way to grow.

The window of the wizards’ tower overlooks the backyard of Mordred Manor. 

There’s a small graveyard plot, its grass overgrown. There are a few trees, as old and strange and history-filled as the rest of the house. There’s a hill that gently slopes down to the edge of the woods, a short walk into which you’ll reach a creek. But you can’t see that from the window; just the hill and the trees and the messy grass.

Aelwyn spends a lot of her time looking at that yard, when she’s home-where-it-does-not-feel-like-home. Plain and drab and sad. Her sister and her friends go to school and the adults go to work, but Aelwyn spends most days home alone. She can hardly stand to look at that empty yard for another second.

So, she decides she won’t.

She goes to the library one day, and spends hours browsing the shelves and reading, taking notes. She comes home in the evening when the library closes with a stack full of books, and stays up late reading them in bed while her sister trances in the bunk below. The next day she scours the garage and basement and storage of the manor for tools, anything she can scrounge together. She gathers them out back in preparation, leaning them against the wall outside. The next day, she goes out again, borrowing cash from Jawbone to get the items she’s missing. She thinks about stopping by the mall, too, for the right outfit, but Sandra Lynn catches on and gives her an old pair of boots and overalls for free.

The next day, she gets up early, and gets to work. 

The first few days are nothing but digging, ripping up grass and sprinkling fertilizer and turning the soil until there are new, neatly defined beds outlining the house and the yard, blank canvases.

She loses two days to a spring thunderstorm, one raining her out all day and one sunny but swamped with mud, setting her progress back at least a few more days. She feels like tearing her hair out, and throws a trowel across the yard in frustration. 

She comes back the next day, pulls the trowel out of the ground from where it’d stuck, and gets back to work. She spends hours one day lining the beds with rocks to keep them neat and pretty, and checking the levels of soil temperature, nutrient balance, everything. She makes a chart in her notebook, portioning out where everything will go. 

The next day she spends ten straight hours planting. Her only break, around noon, is when Jawbone comes out and brings her a sandwich and a lemonade and practically begs her to take a rest. She obliges, if only to quiet the distracting growl of her stomach. He has to come back out and drag her in when the sun goes down for dinner, despite her protests. When she washes up to eat, it takes her two minutes of scrubbing to remove the dirt stubbornly caked into her fingernails. 

If there’s anything good to come out of being an unemployed, out-of-school teenager slowly and painfully rebuilding herself from trauma, it’s that Aelwyn has a lot of free time. Free time she spends every day out under the sun in her new garden, planting seeds and sprouts and monitoring their progress, new greens popping up row by row. She covers the beds with mulch and straw to protect their roots, just like the books say to do. She waters them every morning, and curses when the rain comes and renders her work redundant. Her delicate elven skin starts to burn in the sunlight, even after she takes to wearing a wide-brimmed hat, but after so long it just starts to tan instead. Now when she washes in the evening she sees someone her parents would have hated – face sweaty and flushed, hands caked in dirt and callouses from work – and it feels good, in a strange way. There is a satisfaction in going to bed each night, climbing up onto the top bunk and collapsing in the pillows with the deep-set, satisfied exhaustion of hard work in her bones. 

Her garden starts out well enough, neatly arranged and manicured and ready to go. Then days pass, and weeks, and there is not much more to show. Nor is there enough new work to sustain her breakneck pace. Aelwyn stares out the window of the wizards’ tower and grows restless and frustrated again. She’s doing everything right. She’s double checked every book in the library about it. Why aren’t they growing? Why isn’t it perfect?

The manor’s inhabitants have long since figured out Aelwyn’s project, and her dedication to it, and they respect it. They don’t bother her when she’s working and they don’t offer to help, an interference. But visitors don’t always get that so intrinsically, and the Bad Kids have a lot of friends. There are the girls who live here, and then their male partymates, and occasionally other guests. The half-orc brings a satyr girlfriend along often, most times he visits.

“I like your garden,” she says. Aelwyn is sitting on the back porch, staring broodily over her stunted plants. She glances over her shoulder at the satyr unkindly, she who has broken the unspoken rule against disturbing her in her yard.

Aelwyn grunts and turns back, scowling. “I don’t.”

“O-oh,” Zelda says nervously. “I’m sorry, that was stupid. It’s, um, it’s just…fine?” she stammers to correct herself.

Aelwyn huffs. “They won’t grow properly. I’ve done everything right.” She gestures in frustration at the neat rows of plants, manicured but underwhelming. 

“Some people, uh, some people just don’t have a green thumb,” Zelda says. “I mean, like, satyrs are supposed to be, like, really in touch with nature and stuff, right? But I can’t even keep a fern alive in my room, it’s like, crazy,” she continues. Aelwyn grunts again. “Have you tried talking to a druid?” Zelda continues. “They’re supposed to, like, know a lot about plants, right?”

“I don’t know any druids,” Aelwyn says bluntly. She’s talked to Sandra Lynn; a ranger is as close as she can get, but Sandra Lynn doesn’t know any more about gardening than Aelwyn does.

“I could ask Danielle for you?” Zelda offers. Aelwyn turns again and looks at her, confused. “Danielle Barkstock. She’s, uh, my party’s druid.”

“Danielle Barkstock,” Aelwyn repeats, placing the name. “She was one of those girls in the crystals.”

“Um,” Zelda says. “Yeah. Um. We all were. Uh…we formed an adventuring party together after…that.”

Aelwyn laughs once, no humor to it. “I’m sure she would love to help me out with my pathetic little shithole here.”

“I could ask her for you,” Zelda repeats, sounding intensely nervous again. “I don’t have to tell her it’s for you.” Aelwyn looks her over again. “Sorry, it’s a crazy, stupid idea, I’m just…ignore me, haha, it’s stupid–”

“Would you?” Aelwyn cuts her off, sounding uncharacteristically soft. Zelda blinks, then nods.

A few days later, all the Bad Kids and all the Maidens are over at the manor for a party. Aelwyn pointedly stays out of the way, spending the afternoon in her garden. She hears the back porch door slide open and looks back to see who’s there. Zelda, and a half-elven girl with flowers braided into her hair. Actually, there’s a third with them: a small silver fox. 

“You must be Aelwyn,” the half-elf says.

“You must be Danielle,” Aelwyn returns coolly. Danielle descends the porch steps and wanders through the garden, observing Aelwyn’s work silently. Aelwyn waits, kneeling in the dirt, for any kind of feedback. “You’re a druid, then?” Aelwyn says, breaking the awkward silence. Danielle nods. Her fox wanders between the plants, sniffing them as it goes. “You know what’s wrong here, then? Why they won’t grow?”

“I know more about animals than plants,” Danielle responds neutrally. Aelwyn shuts up and looks down. “But I think I have an idea here,” she continues, finally looking at Aelwyn. She turns around and meets her gaze, hopeful if restrained. “It’s too perfect. You have to step back and let them grow on their own for a bit.”

Aelwyn’s brow furrows, confused. “I’m doing everything the gardening books say to do.”

“Then stop reading books,” Danielle says simply. “Plants are living things. They’ll tell you what they need if you let them grow and listen.” With that, she walks back to the house, her familiar following at her heel. 

Aelwyn blinks, dumbfounded and confused, and offers a feeble “thanks” as she goes. Danielle holds up a hand but doesn’t look back.

It feels strange, and foreign, and wrong to sit back, but Aelwyn forces herself to heed the druid’s advice. She returns the gardening manuals to the library. She spends time in her garden still, but without tools in her hands. She lays in the grass and looks at the sky. She drinks tea and reads under the shade of the tree. She keeps the grass in the graveyard plot trimmed.

It does take a few days for her to notice, but her plants do start to grow again. They creep beyond the boundaries she’d so carefully delineated for them, and she fights the urge to trim them back. She watches and listens to them closely, not with the eye or ear of a drill sergeant but of a parent, a real one, a loving one, one like Sandra Lynn who offered her overalls and one like Jawbone who brings her lunch and lemonade and asks her to rest. She finds what the plants ask for, and she gives it to them; plucks insect pests from their stems, prunes diseased leaves, ties them to stakes so they can grow tall, waters them when they’re wilting. 

By summer, it is no longer just green. Aelwyn wakes up one morning and looks out the window in the wizards’ tower, and for the first time, she sees pink. The next day, yellows. Soon, there is a rainbow of flowers blooming all over the yard, of a variety and vitality Aelwyn has never seen before. Her old home had a garden, sure, but it was too manicured, too neat, too formal, too artificial, and never was she allowed to tamper with it; that’s what hired landscapers were for. Mordred Manor has no hired hands; Aelwyn has her own.

Jawbone and Sandra Lynn meet her in her garden one day. It’s sunny and hot out, and Aelwyn is watching the bees and butterflies flit from plant to plant, drinking their fill of sweet nectar. They say how beautiful it is, and Aelwyn agrees. They tell her how proud they are of her work, and she agrees. They say they’re proud of how much she’s grown. (At first she thinks they mean the plants, but she realizes after what they really mean.) And they thank her for livening up the manor, and bringing some color out to the yard.

When they go inside, Aelwyn gets up, and grabs her shears. She finds the best blossoms from the best plants and carefully snips them off, tying their stems together in a bouquet with ribbon. And she sends them to Danielle, with an apology and a thank you.

[bixbiboom]

fey anon here. 1) got the paladin to tell him his real name 2) pulled me into the paladin's dream and vice versa 3) said some stuff that I don't recall cause I don't have my campaign notes right now. 4) made generally eerie landscapes with a fruity scent on the breeze and two moons in the sky 5) trying real hard to get the bard to eat and drink at his table which he DID NOT thank god. 6) frequently appears wearing jesters motley 7) referenced other BBEGs.

Part 2: Also you're right dream sequences SLAP. our DM does a lot of them. There's the Fey, also my roguelock's fiend patron usually sends her new commands and threats in dreams as the form of a two-headed goat. It's actually fucking terrifying. Periodically he'll do normal dreams (non extra-planar being related) to our paladin. tragic backstory stuff. Drawing attention to specific memories. Any time our party is about to take a rest I AM ON THE EDGE OF MY SEAT THERE ARE SO MANY POSSIBILITIES

Part 3: the best part is (I'm rambling) my roguelock loves to dance. like casually, but it's something she enjoys. this was private information, character quirks, but once the Fey started targeting the bard with food temptation and learning the paladin's name? I told my DM "btw, she likes to dance. just a little tidbit about her, do with it what you will, have fun." hoping he'll take it where I want him to. we'll see.

Okay, first of all, your DM sounds AWESOME and ENGAGING and now I’m gonna HAUNT MY PLAYERS DURING LONG RESTS.

And I love how your response to watching your fellow partymates get nightmarish visions from an extraplanar entity was like “hey so here’s a hidden fact about my character it’d be a shame if someone were to abuse this information~”

So like... would it be weird to ask for updates? Because I’d like updates. XD

[fernsplaysthings]

Nat 1, 5, 6, 9, 11, 15, 17! All or any.

Ohey

It’s a long post!

Nat 1. Most memorable crit fail?

This is kind of a tough one given our DMs are gentle with the outcomes of a critical failure. 

That said one of Tobi’s deaths was on a reflex save, a skill she should’ve aced being a Rogue, but up comes the nat. 1 and she gets pummeled from positive heath down to her negative CON score.

5. A fun fact about your character?

Quinn (Jade Regent) has a -2 STR modifier. She recently took enough STR damage to paralyse her. Luckily she has her Eidolon, Sheidra, to do all the heavy lifting with her +9 STR mod.

Iliya (Curse of the Crimson Throne) only ever told a single character her name through the whole campaign lasting over two years. It wasn’t a PC. She eventually ended up marrying said NPC.

Tobi (Homebrew, Settlers in the Foglands) started her traveling career by getting caught running rigged card games and pickpocketing with her brother around a circus set up. The troupe allowed them to stay so long as they got a cut. Eventually Tobi ended up in aerial performances, where her acrobatic and climbing skills come from.

6. Best DM you’ve ever had?

Honestly, all of my Pathfinder DMs are wonderful. They all excel at different aspects. One is fantastically technical and detailed. One is an incredible storyteller. One has an incredible imagination. And all of these things can apply to all of them in different ways. Plus they’re all great to talk to and work stuff out with. 

9. Do you keep any dnd superstitions? (e.g., dice jail, “charging” dice on the lowest side, etc)

We play online so no dice jail for us, however:

- The DM can list themselves as particular NPCs in chat, if that NPC starts rolling really high against us they’re banned from rolling for the DM.- If one person is rolling reall low, the others will roll high.- You can ‘use up’ low/high rolls.- If the DM states the DC before the roll, you’re either going to nail it or crit fail. There’s no mid ground. Ever.- Particular players are banned from making important rolls (or will be specifically asked to make a roll if it needs to be low/high).

11. If you got the chance to play at a “celebrity” DM’s table (e.g. matt mercer, griffin mcelroy), what kind of character would you design and why?

I’m not...super all about ‘celebrity’ TTRPG things but while I’d say my way of playing is more Critical Roll, TAZ: Balance was incredible and is a huge inspiration to me when it comes to trying to create the feel of an ‘epic’ storyline.

What would I design though? I couldn’t tell you, honestly. The way these DMs work with character’s storylines and twist things into them and use parts is so incredible and their storytelling just has another layer to it. I’d have to think really hard about how not to overwork a character without leaving them too much of a blank slate...

This...is a hard question heh I really don’t know.

15. The most creative solution to a problem / encounter / puzzle that you’ve thought of?

[!!!]

This has Cindermaw written all over it.

In Curse of the Crimson Throne part of the story involved winning favour with the locals. And to do that we had to take on some trials, one of which was ritual rebirth by...wurm vore.

Essentially a character had to be swallowed by a Colossal Red Wurm named Cindermaw and cut their way out of it’s stomach.

Iliya was volunteered because the logic was that a Red Wurm was fire based and Iliya, being a Tiefling, had innate fire resistance and magic to overcome it.

In order to speed the process along, instead of baiting the wurm into eating her, once combat started Iliya prepared Force Hook. A spell that would kind of...grapple hook her to her targetted location. When Cindermaw opened it’s mouth and breathed fire over the party she fired into the back of it’s throat, launched herself in through the fire and into the wurm.

So it turned out that the internal damage was crushing, not fire.

And that it had unreasonably high AC for guts.

So Nafe, our Gunslinger, blasted the wurm open from the outside.

17. Describe a near-death experience.

Jade Regent - Quinn faced off against an Ice Giant and got her guts pulled out with a greataxe.

Curse of the Crimson Throne - Iliya jumped the gun on a choke point and took a lightningbolt to the face. There was the time she got crit by a shocking grasp. Cindermaw was VERY near death. 

And even closer was during one of the penultimate battles where she had to defend her partymates from a huge Red Mantis. She was at 1HP, parried an attack roll of 49 (she had 42AC and rolled a 51 to parry) but ended up taking the next three attacks which would’ve killed her outright had it not been for the divine artifact she used to fight which set her back to -1HP.

Settlers in the Foglands - Tobi...wait...Tobi’s had no ‘near death’ experiences. Only ‘full death’ experiences.

[shookethbrooketh]

stars

chapter 16

“guess we’re gonna be here for a while,” dan said, pulling out his pocket watch. he smiled fondly for a moment at his initials engraved on the outside, feeling the warmth of his family in it. a pang he’d managed to avoid for a while entered his stomach, and he shook his head, opening it up to quickly check the time before shoving it back in his pocket. “the party’s only twenty more minutes; we’ll be fine here.”

summary: dan grew up in a normal 1930s london family with his parents and little brother. everything was completely and utterly normal… until the bombs started dropping. When dan was fifteen his father went off to war, and when he was sixteen he and his brother hayden were sent off to a foster family in rural england. he looked up at the stars and couldn’t help but wonder how something that beautiful could exist in such a broken world. just when he thought things would never get better, dan met phil, and he became the shining star of his life. but when phil turned eighteen and went off to war, dan couldn’t help but wonder when, if ever, the stars would twinkle the same way again.

rating: t

genre: angst, fluff, history au, strangers to lovers, teenagers

whole fic warnings: warfare (not descriptive), bombings, fire, panic attacks, ptsd, epilepsy/seizures, homophobia, death chapter warnings: n/a

chapter word count: 1.0k total word count: 20.7k

read it on ao3 read it on wattpad fic masterlist

Shouts echoed around the room as Phil popped open the third bottle of champagne. Dan laughed along with everyone, although he was the only one of his friends who wasn’t drunk at the graduation party. All the parents had been adamant that no laws were to be broken, and Dan wasn’t old enough to drink. All his graduating friends, however, were nearing the brink of wasted, and Dan felt as if he had to babysit every single name on the invitation.

Although he spent plenty of the evening glancing around at his other friends, his main focus was on Phil, as he’d learnt something new about his boyfriend that night; he was a VERY romantic drunk.

“Daaaaan,” he said, stumbling over to Dan. “I loooove youuu.”

Dan’s eyes went wide; this was the exact opposite of what Phil would normally say. Dan chuckled nervously, glancing around at the few friends who appeared to hear him. “How much has he had, amirite?” They narrowed their eyes and turned around to go talk to their other tipsy friends.

“Why did I have to get the lightweight?” Dan asked himself as he grabbed Phil’s hand and pulled him into the hall. Dan would have loved to have gone somewhere more private, but he didn’t even know where the hell this party was. “Phil, pull it together!”

“What do you mean? I’ve got it together! Ya know why?” Phil replied, swinging his arm towards Dan and spilling champagne on the carpet.

Dan rolled his eyes. “Why?”

“Because I’m in love with you,” he said, throwing his arms around Dan’s neck.

“I know that, but I don’t think now i-” he was cut off by Phil connecting his lips to his own. He could taste the alcohol as he pushed him off. “Not now, Phil.”

“Why nooooot?”

“We just can’t, okay?” Dan stood for a moment before finally coming up with an idea. “You wanna play a game?”

“Sure! I love games!”

“We’re gonna roleplay. Instead of dating, you and me are best friends. You wanna see how many people you can convince I’m just your best friend?”

“That sounds fun!”

“Great,” Dan said, patting Phil on the back and leading him back into the party.

They made their way into a circle of their close friends, who were busy telling jokes that no sober person could understand. “Hello, fellow heterosexuals!” Dan took Phil and whirled him around back towards the hall.

“That’s enough of that,” he said, settling down on the floor. “Guess we’re gonna be here for a while,” Dan said, pulling out his pocket watch. He smiled fondly for a moment at his initials engraved on the outside, feeling the warmth of his family in it. A pang he’d managed to avoid for a while entered his stomach, and he shook his head, opening it up to quickly check the time before shoving it back in his pocket. “The party’s only twenty more minutes; we’ll be fine here.”

After they got to talking, Dan grew fond of drunk Phil. When he wasn’t trying to come onto him in public or tell him secrets he either didn’t want to know or already knew, he was a fun partymate.

“You’re a pretty cool guy, ya know that?” Phil said, reaching out to shake Dan’s hand as the party wrapped up and people began to leave. “We should get together sometime.”

“Phil, you’re my boyfriend.”

“Oh,” he said, hesitating. “That’s gay.”

Dan couldn’t help but laugh as he pulled Phil up from the floor and draped Phil’s arm around his shoulder for balance as they followed the rest of the family out onto the street. “Yes,” he said, grinning from ear to ear. “Yes it is.”

“My head hurts,” Phil moaned as Dan stood in his doorway.

“I’d be concerned if it wasn’t,” Dan replied quietly with a smug grin. He made his way to the side of Phil’s bed and set down the breakfast tray in his hands on Phil’s lap. “Thought you might appreciate this,” he added as he whirled around to shut the curtains and leave Phil in the dark.

“Absolutely. I’m starving,” he said, laying into the toast.

Dan climbed into bed beside him and took a small bite of Phil’s eggs. “You’re a handful of a drunk, you know that?”

Phil took a deep breath. “I’m sorry. I honestly don’t remember what I did.”

“You seemed very proud to be dating me,” Dan said. He could tell Phil was worried he was mad, but he had a joking smile on his face. “Sorry to have pulled you away from your own graduation party. I assumed it was what sober Phil would have wanted.”

“You had to drag me out of the party so I didn’t tell all our friends we’re gay? Yeah, you definitely made the right decision there.”

“Thanks for the closure,” Dan said with a laugh he immediately stifled because he could tell it was hurting Phil’s sensitive eardrums. “Maybe we should just be quiet,” he added as he took out a deck of cards. It reminded him of Hayden, who he’d been thinking about a lot lately. His summer goal was to balance his relationships better, which he knew full and well was a week point of his. At that time, Hayden was fast asleep, and Phil needed him far more than the boy.

“Even hung over, I’ll still demolish you at any card game.”

“Bet?” Dan asked, giving him a challenging look as he slid the cards out of their cardboard box.

Phil grinned, putting aside his almost empty plate and taking only the glass of water he knew he needed to be drinking in his hand. He set the empty tray down as a flat surface, and made eye contact with Dan. “Bet.”

[welovetheherb]

Some Conservatives think legalizing cannabis will turn kids into drug mules

New Post has been published on http://theherbnews.com/some-conservatives-think-legalizing-cannabis-will-turn-kids-into-drug-mules.html

Some Conservatives think legalizing cannabis will turn kids into drug mules

Members of Parliament are sparring over the Liberals’ laws on leisure pot that’s set to return into impact by subsequent summer time.

Debate within the House of Commons over the past two weeks has contained considerate critiques of the Cannabis Act from all events.

But for a handful of opposition MPs, reefer insanity seems to have taken maintain, with some warning of highschool trafficking rings and youngsters chomping down on weed crops within the kitchen.

Here are some highlights from the back-and-forth over the pot invoice.

Baby drug mules

The Conservatives instantly went on the offensive.

The get together, whereas in authorities, usually solely referred to weed as “marihuana” with then-Prime Minister Stephen Harper as soon as describing it as “worse than tobacco.”

MP Marilyn Gladu was particularly involved over the proposed legislation’s provisions that will enable teenagers below 18 to own, and share, as much as 5 grams of cannabis with out dealing with legal prices.

“Does the minister not agree that this would put cannabis in the hands of youth? In fact, they would probably become the drug mules at the school,” Gladu decried.

Her partymate Rob Nicholson shared her considerations.

“How can the government ensure that children and teenagers will not be recruited by organized crime? I can see that is what is going to happen,” stated Nicholson, who served because the international affairs and justice minister below the earlier Conservative authorities.

“Well if I was a drug dealer, all of my street people would be under the age of 17.”

The Conservatives aren’t the one ones with considerations — Wayne Stetski, NDP MP from British Columbia, nervous that not making use of the legal code to teenagers in these instances may endanger them.

The Liberals argued that whereas the legislation would drop legal penalties for youth, it might nonetheless apply to adults who visitors cannabis. It even proposes a better most jail sentence for individuals who share marijuana with children. Justice Minister Jody Wilson-Raybould and others repeatedly stated leisure cannabis will be tightly managed, identical to alcohol and tobacco.

But none of that satisfied Alberta Conservative Jim Eglinski, who raised the difficulty once more afterward.

“I have heard people talk about how the legislation will protect our children from organized crime,” he stated. “Well if I was a drug dealer, all of my street people would be under the age of 17, and I would make sure they never carried more than five grams on their person. It would be a pretty safe way of doing business. That is the shocking part of it. The government has not thought about that.”

This entire factor prompted Conservative MP Garnett Genuis, one of many youngest members of his caucus, to decry the invoice as “Orwellian.”

Kitchen crops

One factor that basically bothers Nicholson is that Bill C-45 will enable adults to develop their very own weed crops. In his view, it’s a horrible factor to do in entrance of kids.

”Is there any simpler manner for younger folks to get marijuana than if their dad and mom have 4 crops within the kitchen? Is there any simpler manner for them to have entry than that?” Nicholson requested.

“With respect to the four plants in the household, if the minister would refer to poisoning data,” Gladu added. “She would see that kids eat plants all the time, because their parents do not put them up in the cupboard.”

While well being consultants have raised the difficulty of cannabis crops as being a hazard, there’s little proof to recommend kids would eat marijuana crops at a better charge than different home crops.

“Kids eat plants all the time.”

The justice minister rebutted that it’s as much as folks to maintain probably dangerous substances away from youngsters, as they need to with alcohol and prescribed drugs within the residence.

By the next week, Gladu had concocted an particularly alarming residence rising situation.

“We have already established that this legislation would put marijuana in the hands of children, not just with the 15 joints that 12-year-olds can have,” she stated. “But with the four plants per household, so little Johnny can put some in the toaster oven and smoke it up.”

Edibles

Though Bill C-45 doesn’t enable for cannabis edibles to be offered within the new leisure market straight away — the federal government says it will look into it later — Nicholson needs it handled straight away, by retaining them unlawful.

“Let us consider the dangers for young people who may come in contact with marijuana edibles,” he stated. “I have seen photographs, as I am sure other members have, of these edibles. They are indistinguishable from candy treats or baked goods that are often found on the kitchen counter, in the kitchen cupboard, or even in a cookie jar, enticing prizes for young children.”

What the cool kids say

Quebec Conservative MP Luc Berthold recalled the time he met with highschool kids to talk about weed. “I sometimes asked their teachers if they would leave the class because I wanted honest answers,” he stated.

“I am not talking about statistics, studies, or bogus consultations.”

“I asked them how many of them had ever tried marijuana, how many had tried a joint, and how many had tried it just once. About a third of them, 30%, 35%, or 40%, depending on the class, raised their hands in front of their teacher or even their father. It seemed cool,” he stated. “It is odd, because it is not all that cool, since only a third raised their hands. When I asked them if they supported the legalization of marijuana, even those who had tried it did not all raise their hands. A smaller number support the legalization of marijuana.”

It’s this small pattern pool that proves, for him, why the Liberals’ proposed legislation is flawed.

“That is what young people are telling me. I am not talking about statistics, studies, or bogus consultations to justify an election promise,” he stated. “I am talking about what young people are saying about this issue.”

Colorado…?

Steven Blaney, who beforehand served as Canada’s minister of public security and, extra just lately, ran for his get together’s management, warned of repeating the failures of Colorado.

“In Colorado, there have been not one, not two, not three, however seven devastating results on the unfavourable social prices associated to the legalization of marijuana,” Blaney stated. “Including increased consumption by youth, consumption at an early age, and increased numbers of arrests, people in emergency care, hospitalizations, and fatal accidents.”

Blaney summed up: “Science shows that, contrary to what they say, it is truly devastating.”

Blaney doesn’t cite his statistics, however a few of his information are off. The Colorado Department of Public Health and Environment reported final 12 months that teen use of pot really dipped after legalization, placing it beneath the nationwide common. Although, he’s proper in saying that emergency room visits have spiked since cannabis was legalized.

But arrests within the state are manner down. Between 2010 and 2014 (Colorado legalized restricted cannabis sale and possession in 2012 and allowed for leisure gross sales in 2014) arrests for all marijuana-related prices decreased by 80 %.