#i wasn't sure if having the term prince in here was okay

[little-pup-pip]

hihi ^-^ if you haven't already could you do a masc leaning kidcore board with dinos and a deco paci? -@tinikip

Definitely!!

[questionablemorally]

Okay, I lied, I’m sorry. I’ve been trying to do something for a Sebagni fic but I genuinely have no energy…

Instead how about some more Sebagni HCs so I can make up for it? And I will get to ACTUALLY writing a modern au for them… eventually!

So, as always, here’s some HCs for the ship that has my heart currently - warning: this one contains nsfw under the cut.

Agni is a very affectionate person everywhere - he loves showering Sebastian with compliments and talking about him to everyone, and he’s a fan of PDA. However, Sebastian is a lot more reserved on this - he will absolutely speak well on Agni if he’s brought up in conversation, and he will lean into Agni’s touch, but he’s mainly affectionate in privacy, to maintain his aesthetic. He has no problem teasing the other in public, though.

They barely ever argue or disagree, as they have similar opinions on the things they normally talk about, and what Seb does disagree with Agni on, he is instead shown a new perspective that leaves him thinking more deeply about it.

Saying this, when they do argue (which, again, I couldn’t see them doing often. It would be a very rare and unfortunate occurrence), everyone notices how Agni is a lot more anxious and a little impatient, and Seb is a LOT more irritable and snappy.

Ciel and Soma are like their adopted children. Whenever the two get into trouble as kids do, Sebastian is the one they face lecturing from. Agni makes sure they are okay, but isn’t ever harsh on them, so Seb has to be strict for the both of them.

They are very protective over one another. Agni in the sense that he really cares for everyone in his life, and Seb in the sense that it’s ‘his human’. So if somebody insults/upsets one of them, they should watch their back.

As far as relationships in kuroshitsuji go, theirs is genuinely pretty healthy (or as healthy as it can be). I feel like if Agni did actually know Sebastian is a demon, he might be surprised, sure, but otherwise not really bothered about it. He is of the firm belief that anyone can change and be a good person - just as he did - so, even if Seb is a being of sin, he would still love and protect him.

One time, Soma flung the doors to Agni’s room open in the morning, and was shocked to see Sebastian sitting in Agni's bed, wrapped in his khansama's arms as they had been enjoying the early hours together. The prince may be young and energetic, but he wasn't about to separate the two - who he thought were so clearly soulmates - so he immediately apologised and left.

In terms of their sex life, Agni is really soft. He likes praising his partners, kissing them gently, taking his time, and I could see him doing body worship. Sebastian sometimes manages to convince Agni to be a bit more rough with him but, surprisingly (to himself too), he enjoys the praise a lot more than he’d expected...

Aftercare is Agni’s expertise. He tends to feel really guilty if Seb mentions any pain after their nights together, and is so sweet with him right afterwards - cuddling, bringing him water, cleaning them both up, immediately tending to any wounds… even just light bruises.

Agni loves it when Sebastian rides him. To him, it’s like the ideal position - facing each other, close proximity to allow for kisses or touches, etc. As soon as Seb learnt this, he also found out that, to get Agni flustered and heated quickly, he just had to straddle him. He uses this way too much, and it still works every time.

Sebastian doesn’t have many stand-out preferences, but there are a few that catch him off guard. One of these, Agni learnt, is fingering - especially while kissing. Seb prides himself on his physical self-control, so both were just a little concerned when he started shaking and gasping into the kiss. It also helps that Agni has his blessed right hand…

Last, quick one: Agni often cries in the act, and Seb finds this incredibly endearing.

That’s it for now, thank you for reading and I will write the modern au fic soon! Let me know me if you want it super sweet or angsty or nsfw etc. I don’t mind, I need to practise more lol.

[warning-heckboop]

The Day the Trolls' Music Died (and then Came Back Again)

Okay, so I've been thinking about the events of World Tour again, especially the scene in which Poppy destroys the strings and all members of all the tribes go grey. The question that I've seen quite a few people ask, including myself, is how did this event effect the trolls who weren't present at the concert at the time.

Now, before Band Together, there wasn't really any particular reason to assume that there were any trolls, of any tribe or smaller subdivision, who weren't at the concert, because Barb's plan explicitly involved gathering all known trolls to ensure that all types of music other than rock were eliminated. Of course it can always be assumed that there would be a few stragglers out there, but the thing that changed with Band Together was the confirmation that this was in fact the case. At the time, there were at least three individual trolls on their own (at least in terms of not being around other trolls) in John Dory, Bruce, and Floyd, and then a whole community in Viva, Clay, and the Putt-Putt trolls.

So lets say they all went grey as well when the strings were destroyed (there is an argument that they wouldn't've been affected, considering the explosion that happened when the guitar was smashed that took everyone's colors away only seemed to have a range of the stadium, but I'm going to proceed under the assumption that the effects were even farther reaching than that). Obviously it would have been a big shock, and confusing as all hell, but that's not my focus here. What I'm wondering about is how they got their color back.

Sure, we can just say they automatically got their color back suddenly with all the other trolls during the big glitter explosion that the leaders caused, but where's the fun in that? I'd prefer to think they got their color back gradually--and that they experienced the same realization that their color, their music, their life comes from inside them. When Poppy and Branch's heartbeats glowed to life, so did their siblings'.

But let's back up a little. My focus is mostly based on family bonds, and this is largely because of the first trolls at the concert who realize they still have music inside of them. If you haven't seen the movie in a while, it's not Poppy or Branch like you might expect. It's Cooper, who is then joined by Prince Darnell, and then also by King Quincy and Queen Essence.

This is something I threw together based on my train of thought. Cooper's heart is the first to come to life. When he then lets it play over the speaker system, any of the trolls present, including Miss-Main-Character Poppy, could have been the one to react to it and see that it was music. But it wasn't anyone--it was his brother. Cooper's light lit the light in Darnell's heart, and then both brothers making music together lit their parents' hearts as well, allowing the Queen and King to be the first two trolls to acknowledge the fact that the trolls all still had music within them. The way I see it, these trolls all have a sort of connection between them, because they're family. Strings connecting them, so to speak. That's why they don't need the six strings to give them music anymore--because the ability to create music now comes from the strings of their relationships with one another.

Cheesy, I know. But it's a kids movie. Stick with me.

So how does this apply to the trolls not at the concert? Well, just because these other trolls weren't there physically doesn't mean they didn't have bonds to trolls who were there. For Viva and Brozone, they have Poppy & her dad and Branch, obviously, but even for the other Putt-Putt trolls, it's pretty likely most if not all of them had some connection to someone at the concert, considering they were all once members of the Pop tribe too.

So, just like how Darnell and his parents were drawn to respond to Cooper's actions, I think these other trolls would be drawn to action by the trolls they have connections with, too--because bonds of family can't be severed, not completely, by time and distance.

When Poppy finally starts to sing, I think Viva does, too. They're hundreds of miles apart, but their hearts still beat together as one, and so too do their voices sing out. The same goes for Branch and his brothers, too, and all the other trolls who had connections to those back at the concert.

And so, through the same song, all of troll-kind, everywhere, got their color back--even if many of them couldn't truly understand what had even happened until much, much later.

(Bit of a shame, though, really. If Floyd had stayed grey, maybe Velvet and Veneer would have just seen him as useless and let him go. Ah well.)

[gh0st-t0wn3]

D'you think red son has "icks" or nah, if yes which do you headcanon him to have?

Sorry this took so long, I genuinely wasn't sure how to answer. From what I read, icks are things that make someone less attractive/desirable, right? (I genuinely didn't know what an ick was before this ask, I've heard the term before but I never really understood it, which is why this took so long to answer)

Okay, here's a list of things I came up with, they aren't very much though.

If his partner:

• Has poor hygiene or grooming habits; Redson is a prince, he has expectations set for himself and his partner, now this doesn't necessarily mean that they have to be tidy or dressed up 24/7 but they do have to meet a certain standard. He would definitely worry about Wukong's poor hygiene/grooming habits rubbing off on MK.

• Is disrespectful or rude towards him or others; He knows that MK is a nice person but that doesn't mean he's had other suitors who acted the same, he's definitely met some rude people in the past who were trying to win his hand, but their poor manners towards both him and the people around him (for example, his parents, even if they were never rude to his parents' faces) easily turned him away from their romantic advances.

• Is arrogant or self-centered; as hypocritical as it might sound, given Redson's own arrogant personality, he actually doesn't want to be around someone with the same behavior as him. Redson (even in canon) is quite insecure and has seemingly become arrogant and self centered as a result of his up-bringing and need to impress his family in order to feel as if he deserves their appreciation and attention as well as hiding his vulnerabilities, being around someone who's arrogant simply because they think they're better then everyone else (with no redeeming qualities), and who only cares for their own happiness and material things more than even their partner, couldn't make them more unattractive in his eyes, he needs someone with a softer personality who can help balance out his rough edges.

• Is overly possessive or controlling; Redson doesn't want to be with someone who'll try to control his every move, he needs his time alone and he needs to be able to do things without someone constantly hovering over his shoulder and telling him what to do (lord knows he already experiences this enough with his parents' controlling behavior).

• Doesn't appreciate him or his work; like I said before, Redson already doesn't get enough appreciation from his parents in regards to his work (the Bull clones, his machines and vehicles, the glove that literally LIFTED WUKONGS STAFF AND FREED DBK FROM HIS 500 YEAR IMPRISONMENT), he needs a partner who'll appreciate his work, who'll give him the praise for his work that he's been missing for hundreds of years, if he were to start a relationship with someone only for them to dismiss or ignore his genius, he'll be quick to end things between them.

(Sorry if this answer was disappointing, I really wasn't sure how to answer it, but if you have any more questions, about Redson or anyone else, that I will hopefully have better luck providing a satisfying answer for, I'd love to hear 'em :) )

[writingintheshadowsforever]

Imagine Shuri revealing your true heritage to you

"Shuri wait" Okoye demanded catching the Princess by the wrist as she started in the direction of the dorms.

Shuri came to a stop looking over her shoulder with a guilty expression. "We can't just leave her here Okoye."

"And we can't just whisk her off to Wakanda right now with everything that is going on. Do you really think now is a good time? Okoye argued nodding her head towards Riri who was standing off to the side arms crossed over chest. A single foot tapping the ground as she tried to stay calm. She still didn't know why they were so obsessed with you all of a sudden. Sure your fighting skills was badass but surely Wakanda had better warriors.

Shuri ran both of her hands through her hair letting out a long sigh. The General was right now wasn't the time for this, but how was she suppose to carry on with the mission. After this jaw-dropping revelation Erik Killmonger wasn't suppose to have any relatives. She searched every corner of his past and the unpleasantness to make sure. This very day never came a day where another secret relative with direct ties to the throne came out of nowhere. Did you know who you really were? Did your father tell you about Wakanda, and your the history of your grandfather? Were you currently trying to follow in his footsteps and seek out revenge on them right now. It struck her that your father had also attended this same school. Is it why you chose to go MIT as well?

Shuri was going down the rabbit hole of possibilities and it was about to drive her crazy. Okoye moved to stand in front of her and took a hold of her chin gently. She tilted her heads upward to capture her gaze. "Breathe Shuri just breathe" Okoye soothed her rubbing her back. "The girl isn't going anywhere we can return for her another day plus isn't it best we make sure. She truly is his daughter before approaching her."

"Okay does someone want to tell me what is going on?" Riri blurted out.

Shuri's head snapped in her direction with a look or urgency. It made Riri regret speaking up as she shrunk back. "Have you been in her room before?"

Riri answered with a small nod.

"Does she have any pictures of her father?"

"Yeah she got one but she keeps it on her all the time. Its in her locket and she never takes the thing off. Its like her most prized possession her and her pops were real close." Riri informed her speaking in a way that made it clear she knew exactly how you felt. It was one of things you and her bonded over when y'all first met.

"Okoye the locket we need it" Shuri demanded.

"Hold on" Riri spoke up anger in her voice as she walked over to the two. "What's all this about anyway?"

"It doesn't conc-"

"Naw man I didn't tell y'all that so you could go take it from her. The locket is like the last thing she got to remember her father by. All of his other belongings went up in flames when their house caught fire. The picture is everything to her I'm not just going to stand by why you go take it. Not without an explanation" Riri said.

Okoye raised an eyebrow at the young girl's bold behavior. She noticed the way Riri was clenching her fists, and how her mouth twitched. She was nervous and maybe even a little afraid of what would happen next, but she wasn't going to back down. Even though Okoye wouldn't ever admit it Riri had just won a few brownie points with her. She didn't think the girl had it in her. "Easy Riri we're not stealing it we just need it to confirm a theory."

"Well it better be one hell of a theory if it's worth giving her a mental breakdown" Riri replied.

"I have reason to believe that your friend is my long-lost cousin who's father was a Prince of Wakanda" Shuri finally told her.

Her fists unclenched as her eyes widened in surprise then squinted in disbelief. Her hands came up to grip her head as she tried to come to terms with the truth. "Wait what?"

Okoye shook her head. "May I retrieve the locket now with your blessing Riri?"

"Um yeah" Riri waved her off as she started fiddling with her fingers.

Neither of them knew how the General was able to separate the necklace from your neck. After she returned just five minutes later with it in hand. She promised you can to no harm and didn't even notice her enter your dorm. Okoye handed the locket off to Riri surprisingly for safekeeping.

Riri didn't say anything just stuffed it in her pocket, but she appreciated it.

A Week Later

Riri wasn't kidding about the mental breakdown you were going to have if your locket went missing. When you came out of the bathroom to find your locket missing from your nightstand. Where you left it while you gave your face a quick wash off because of the sweat accumulated from the fight. You freaked out and destroyed your entire dorm trying to locate it. At first you assumed that maybe you misplaced where you put it, but deep down you knew it wasn't true. You never misplaced the locket not a single day in your life since your father gifted it too you. Before he departed on what would be his final mission, but at the time neither of you knew that.

You held onto that locket the way a person dangling off a cliff held onto the hand keeping them from falling to their death. The locket was your last connection to your father. The only thing bonding you to him still at least in your mind. So you knew without a doubt you didn't misplace it, or just toss it somewhere carelessly. The second theory that came to mind was Chad and his friends followed you to your dorm. They saw the opportunity to get payback for the beat down you gave them and took it. But if you had been thinking clearly you would’ve realized that you left Chad and one of his lackeys laid out in the courtyard. So it was highly unlikely either of them regained consciousness in such a short period of time, or one of his friends gathered up the courage to follow you to your dorm after the display of your fighting skills.

But you weren't thinking with your head instead your emotions were in control, and just like your dad. When your temper got the better of you it meant destruction and pain. Especially for the target of your anger you tracked Chad and his friends down that same night. At the sight of you stalking towards him with a look of pure hatred in your eyes. While him and his buddies were in the woods at a bonfire party, and away from the school-grounds, and the safety that the rules and policies granted them. The first time y'all faced off sent chills down his spine he dropped his beer, and attempted to run. But with blinding speed you were on him in a matter of seconds. Chad found himself pinned to the ground with his arm pulled upward in your grip. Your hand pushing his face into the ground not caring the dirt was filling the side of his mouth, and one of his nostrils.

His eyes squeezed shut as his screams of pain filled the air when you planted your foot in his back, and yanked on his arm. It felt like you were trying to rip it out of the socket. You leaned down to whisper in his ear.

"One. Chance. Where. Is. My. Locket." You practically growled pausing at each word.

"I don't know I don't know please y/n please." Chad babbled tears pooling up into his eyes. He was the co-captain of the swimming team and had an important meet coming up. If you broke his arm he would be out for the a couple of months.

"Stop lying to me you cocky son of a-" You were cut off when a body slammed into yours knocking you off of him, and to the ground. You and the rescuer rolled over each other. Both of you trying to get the upper hand you managed to plant a foot in the ground. On the fourth roll that put you on top, and push the mystery person down onto their back. Whoever it was struggled to get you off but a swift and hard punch to the nose made them stop. There was a sickening crunch after the blow letting you know their nose had broken. Blood poured from the injury some of it coating your fist as you brought it down again. This time striking the rescuer in the mouth a groan of pain, but at least you didn't knockout a tooth.

Well good for them but shame for you, so you hit the person again in the mouth. They brought a hand up pushing it up against your face, you knocked it away. Then struggled to pin both of their free arms under your knees. You caught a glimpse of the rescuer's face lit up by the flames of the raging fire. It was none other than Liam Hanes the captain of the swimming team, and Chad's best friend. He hadn't been in the courtyard earlier when the two of you got into it. But no doubt did he hear about the fight, and probably plotted some revenge against you.

All you saw was red as you were finally successful in pinning his arms. Now with complete control over him instead going for the face you turned around and slammed your knuckles down onto his taut stomach. His legs kicked out as he screamed in pain "Stevens calm the fuck down its not that serious."

"Yes it is that locket is all I have left this isn't funny. What did you and your friends do with it?" You cried back.

Liam saw the pained look in your expression and knew this had to do with so much more than Chad giving you a hard time. It was personal and if he couldn’t convince of their innocence. There was a good chance him and Chad would leave the party in stretchers tonight. Another rapid shot to the ribs followed by a kidney punch left him winded, and tears in his eyes. He didn't know you could be so ruthless.

"I was at....." He paused taking in as much air as he could only to expel it again to plead his case. "At swimming practice when the shit went down y/n. I didn't hear about the fight till an hour ago here got damnit. Listen to me we didn't do it we were going to dump some paint on you as payback tomorrow in class. Stevens I swear on my mother's grave it wasn't us." His voice got louder as did the desperation in his tone. As you bunched up his shirt in your hand to pull him up a bit. Your fist pulled back as you stared him down.

But when your eyes met his and he swore on his deceased mother that it wasn't him. You had no choice but to believe him because the pain of losing a parent that you loved was one that only so many people knew. And no one spoke on the deceased if they didn't mean it. You let him go and stood up looking around. Some kids were watching the fight go down with their phones up recording. While others were too drunk and caught up with themselves to pay attention.

Chad stood a few feet away clutching his right shoulder. While it wasn't broken you probably did strain so badly till it sprained. He would have to go to the doctor tomorrow.

"I'm sorry" you murmured your apology barely reached his ears, but he nodded. No one tried to stop you from leaving Chad was more concerned with his beaten and battered friend.

You returned to your dorm that night and cried yourself to sleep. The next morning you checked the lost and found with no such luck. As the days went by your mood got worse as you were forced to accept that it might just be gone for good. It wasn't just a normal locket with a normal picture. Your dad specially made it for you out of some precious metal he'd been holding onto, and the picture in it was a mini digital photo reel. It had all of your best memories with him installed it so you could always look back.

You became a ghost around campus, and while no one messed with you in the past. Because you would literally beat the living hell out of them. Now everyone was steering clear of you as if they could see a dark cloud of despair floating above your head.

This went on for a week until out of the blue a knock came from your door bringing you out of your thoughtless trance. Music was softly playing in the background something to just keep you aware, but nothing you really cared to listen to.

Whoever it was knocked again a bit more forceful this time. "Girl come on and open this door I know you in there. People are starting to stare and they looked scared for me. What did you do?"

You threw yourself out of bed hurrying to yank the door open to see if it really was her. The voice sounded familiar but it'd been so long in your head since you heard a friendly voice. You had to be sure you weren't being delusional. Indeed it was Riri Williams who was behind the door dressed in a simple black shirt, tight dark blue jeans, and had a pair of black Nikes on as well.

"Where the hell have you been Riri" You exclaimed throwing your arms around her neck, and burying your face into her shoulder.

She stumbled back from the force of your hug not to mention you had a couple of inches on her in height. But wasted no time in returning the hug. "You didn't hear your girl got whisked away to Wakanda for some outreach program."

You let out a low whistle as you pulled back to look her in the face. "I heard that wasn't sure if it was a rumor or not. How was it?"

"It was eventful I mean don't get wrong Wakanda is beautiful and all but it was a lot" she said.

You finally released and stepped aside to let her in, and missed the way she was trying to gauge your reaction about her mentioning Wakanda.

You closed the door and went over to sit beside her on your bed where she was already located. "I've heard stories about the beauty of that country. I bet the sight was breathtaking, but what happened that made you come back here so fast?"

"Well I know you heard the queen died over there and everything. Things just got crazy afterwards and it didn't feel right to be there" Riri told you. Letting out a sigh afterwards and falling backwards on your bed.

You did the same but scooted over so your head was on her shoulder. "I actually didn't hear about that and I'm sorry you were there for it. I've been out of the loop these past couple of days my locket is gone, and I can't find it."

"Oh yeah I saw Liam and Chad on the way here one of them has an arm in a sling, and the other has a bruised up face with a bandaged nose. I'm guessing that was your doing. She felt your head move against her shoulder in a nod, and let out a little laugh. "Damn I actually feel sorry for them."

"No more sorry than I do I'm surprised neither of them snitched on me. Plenty of kids got the evidence on their phones pretty sure they could've gotten me kicked out of school."

"Well I for one am happy they didn't it was just a misunderstanding after all." Riri tried to reassure you wrapping an arm around your shoulder.

"It doesn't change the fact my locket is gone" you whispered burying your face into her chest.

"You mean this locket" Riri whispered in your ear with a tone of excitement. You looked up to see your locket dangling in her hand, and tears flooded your vision. She managed to slip it around your neck somehow as you sobbed into her chest. Of course you wanted to question her on how she got it. But for now you were just overcome with emotions at being reunited with the thing you valued most in the world. The cool touch of the metal on your neck felt like your father clasping your neck as he looked down at you with that proud smile on his face.

"There's my little solider" He would whisper

Riri brought a hand to your hair and pressed a kiss to the top of your head. "Its okay I know" she repeated over and over letting you get it all out.

"How did you get it?" You asked in between hiccups.

"I found it in the brush near where you beat Chad up that day. It probably came off while you fighting them." She lied smoothly hoping you wouldn't pick up on it. She had rehearsed it a hundred times over during the plane ride back home, and the walk over here.

Shuri caught her by the wrist just as she was leaving and placed it in her hand. "I'm going to assume y/n is going to be looking for this."

Riri opened her hand to see the locket and her eyes widening in realization. "Hell yeah I can't believe I almost forgot it homegirl is probably freaking out still." She had been through so much these past couple of days, but you were her main concern just like that. "Wait is her father who you think he is" she asked curiously.

Shuri gave her a nod the expression on her face going stern. "Do not tell her about it we have no way of knowing how she will react. I'll be there in a few days to talk to her after I take care of something"

Riri assured the Princess of Wakanda she had no desire to be the one to deliver such big news. After all she could barely comprehend it herself.

"I can't believe it was there the whole time" You said with a joyful chuckle.

"Well you know you get pretty heated during those fights. I been telling to learn some damn control" Riri joked with a grin.

"Oh please you be egging me on all the time especially if I'm fighting for you" You laughed lifting your head from her chest to look down at her.

"Hey don't act like those guys don't have it coming plus its not like I don't repay you back. Who does all of your chemical engineering homework for free?"

"You do but don't get a big head about it that has nothing to do with my major. I was shoved into that class by force" You reminded her playfully digging all of your fingers into both of her sides.

"Stevens" she squealed out your last name immediately trying to roll away, but she should've known better. You were an expert at pinning anyone down which is why she hated no despised tickle fights with you. She never stood a chance but luckily for her you were in her debt for finding the locket.

Her laughter was cut off as you pressed her lips to her's in a hesitant but adoring kiss. Your fingers stopped moving against her ribs as your hands rested on her waist. Riri froze up at first but started kissing back the second she realized what was going on. The kiss lasted for maybe two seconds before you pulled away

"Thank you Riri god I freaking love you."

The confession made her speechless too much was happening too fast. Of course she downplayed her relationship with you that day with Shuri and Okoye. She didn't know what they wanted with her, and didn't want them to know about you. While the two of you weren't together then she had definitely been feeling you for a while.

"I love you too" Riri said after a few minutes not wanting you to think she didn't feel the same.

"Mmmm I know" You whispered head resting on her chest again.

Three Days Later

You thought your relationship with Riri would be good after the two of you finally confessed your feelings for each other. Things were okay after the kiss you and her now had a habit of crashing in each other's dorm more often now. And the making out was awesome but you felt like she was keeping something from you. What bothered you the most was you didn't know if it was the new relationship, or whatever happened in Wakanda eating at her.

Every time you tried to talk to her about the trip she would either deflect or completely changed the topic. You didn't think the two things were connected at first until you started noticing the way her gaze would linger on your locket sometimes. When she thought you weren't looking and the guilt on her face as she stared. Like she knew something about your dad that you didn't. You wanted to trust her and let it go but it was your dad. There was still a lot of mystery surrounding his death, and what happened. Which you expected from the beginning when news of his passing finally reached you. But the file the agent gave you was completely blacked out not even telling you where the mission was.

So it was impossible for you to just move on. While you weren't going to twist her arm about it you were going to ask, and pay attention to the way she answered. If Riri lied then you would know.

You were on your way to meet her at a nearby cafe for the conservation. But when you opened your door to leave your dorm you came face to face with Shuri. The Princess of Wakanda.

Your jaw-dropped in shock as you took a step back into your room. She took the opportunity to come into your room, and kick the door shut with her foot.

"Y/N Stevens we need to talk."

Um if you're looking for Riri then I was actually on my way to her right now." You told her with a nervous smile as your mind went haywire. There was no way she was here for you right?

"Riri is actually the one who told me where to find you. She's been worried about you, these past couple of days texting me to come and clear things up with you as fast as possible."

Now she had your attention as your phone slipped from your grip as you were in the middle of texting your girlfriend. "What?"

The phone would've slammed into the floor if it wasn't for Shuri dashing forward to catch it just inches from impact. She tossed it on your bed and took a seat in the desk chair. Leaning forward she rest her elbows on her knees and jutted her chin towards your bed. "You might want to sit down for this."

"What could you possibly know about me that Riri wouldn't be willing to share if she knew too?" You asked.

"Sit down please then we can talk" Shuri demanded again.

You were getting ready to head for the door determined to get the answer out of Riri yourself. When her next words made you freeze up, and your blood run cold.

"Your father Erik Stevens aka Killmonger was a Prince of Wakanda just like his father before him. Prince N'Jobu and that makes you y/n Stevens a Princess of Wakanda as well."

You whirled around eyes widened in shock and they practically bulged out of the sockets. At the sight of her holding up a gold chain with a large purplish black ring on it. The ring was identical to the one your father wore all the time around his neck. It matched the material your chain for your locket was made out of. You squinted your eyes as you realized it was your father's ring. But that was impossible it had to be everything she just said had to be a lie. The room started spinning as you stumbled over to Shuri hand reaching for the ring.

But you fell short as your body collapsed and you lost consciousness. The last thing you remember is Shuri lunging forward to catch your body in her arms. Right before your head hit the floor, and you could swear you heard your father's voice clear as day.

"There's my little solider."

Tag List: @lizlil @darkmemesworld @rhayanm @aliives @angel-bi666 @agustdeeyaa @liliana-byers @lightskintedsblog @marice23top @filmsbyhyuna @shuriswhore @vevethirst @londyn-loves-u @iwillbeabitch @klackyb @ziayamikaelson @taleiakirby @awolfcsworld

[scaly-freaks]

not the same anon, but i was actually ok with brothel scene?

aemond's clearly obsessed with never looking weak, he doesn't feel like he can be weak in front of his family - even his mom. alicent can't offer emotional support to her children (maybe a little to helaena), so they find it elsewhere.

aemond prob view this woman as "beneath him", someone he can use and vent to because what is she gonna do? it doesn't matter if she sees him being weak because she's inconsequential in his world.

aegon and aemond are sooooo affection starved. they do feel, they need to feel loved. they need comfort but lack the emotional intelligence to reach out and form those connections.

It was honestly very tame. I was expecting Homelander level of build up and pay off, but there are good shows and then there's...HOTD. Besides, the fandom is already flustered over this little scene, which for a canon stuffed with incest and non-con and dub-con and gore and violence, a large number of its fans have surprisingly surface-level intelligence/empathy. I do think darker topics require more of both these traits to be consumed well but the show itself chooses not to go full on with them so I'm not surprised the fandom is wrapped in cotton wool and spoon fed like a baby.

And I totally agree with your view on the madame. I am not a fan of terming her his "abuser" the way some people have been doing. Using words frivolously makes them lose all meaning and impact.

In what sense is she an abuser exactly? In the sense that you feel protective over Aemond, and this middle-aged woman is not young or attractive enough to be a satisfying self-insert? And I won't be told this isn't the case with some fans, because some of them definitely have on horse blinkers.

Logically, she is not an abuser. She looked to me like she didn't even want to be there and was disengaged from him mentally/emotionally. He very clearly told her not here and was in control of the situation, suggesting the experience is meticulously tailored to his wants and needs. The last time they met when he was thirteen, sure it's gross that a boy that young is going through something like that, but guess who brought him there? Aegon. The madame turning down the patronage of a royal prince would make her insane if you go by in-world logic. Royal patronage attracts more customers and more money for her girls. It's common sense. Do you know where her real priority was? Getting him to be aware of the smallfolk the next time he loses his temper and does something stupid (since he's already done one stupid thing).

If anything, Aegon might be termed the abuser and the madame was the tool he used, but even then, he was also taught that this behaviour was okay because someone took him to a brothel at 13. Just because he accepted and conformed to this way of living, doesn't mean it wasn't wrong that he went through it too.

Anyway, tip of the iceberg, but there you see - spoon feeding all this context to an audience that is largely unequipped to dive deeper into uncomfortable topics in the span of an hour is impossible.

[princes-and-problems-au]

Mentorship

(Lore under the cut!)

Michael is the oldest of his siblings, and was the ruler of Heaven. Due to this he constantly felt pressure to be, well, perfect. He quite literally had everything, and everyone, dependent on him.

There are triads of angels, and departments. Triads is the word used to describe the three levels of hierarchy in Heaven. It goes something like this:

Triad 1, Seraphim, Cherubim, Thrones.

Triad 2, Dominions, Virtues, Powers.

Triad 3, Principalities, Archangels, Angels.

(Note 1: You may notice I have listed 'archangel' as the second lowest triad, I have explained this in a separate post here.)

(Note 2: From now on, 'angel' will be used to refer to the species, while 'winner' will be used to refer to a human soul that went to heaven, and the lowest type of angel.)

The princes are above this hierarchy, as the oldest beings. This means many Triads/Departments are lead by Princes. Michael lead the seraphim.

Leading both Heaven, and specifically the seraphim took a toll on Michael's health, mental and physical, and especially after the War in Heaven, where Lucifer and the Sins rebelled. He grew paranoid, constantly awaiting another betrayal, and his siblings grew worried. So, they staged an intervention.

Michael would take on an assistant, someone who would help shoulder his duties, to keep Michael from spiraling. Sera was this assistant. At the time she was a young seraph, and was enchanted at the thought of working with the ruler of heaven. She idolized him, and hoped to be as great as him one day.

However, Sera learnt that her Idol wasn't perfect. Despite Sera attempting to help, Michael continued to flip-flop between spiraling and pretending everything was okay. Sera saw both the worst and best of her mentor, and in turn Michael shaped many of Sera's traits and attributes.

It was rocky at first, Michael thinking Sera was some sort of spy for his siblings, and Sera dealing with her disillusionment. Overtime, though, they grew to care for one another, and slowly, Michael got better.

One of Sera's happiest memories is of her time as Michael's student, when Michael would tell stories of the time before the War in Heaven, which Sera was too young to remember.

Unfortunately, things would not last. One day, Michael spiraled too far, he had gotten it into his head that Hell was simmering for a second rebellion, and began stockpiling weapons. Thankfully, his siblings, alongside Sera, staged Michael's final intervention. They begged him to retire, to go to therapy, but Michael was stubborn. The confrontation culminated when Sera burst into tears, saying she didn't want to see her mentor deteriorate further. Michael realized that maybe he had been going too far, and stepped down, both as leader of Heaven, and as leader of the seraphim.

Sera, relieved her mentor finally went to therapy, was promoted. Now she was leader of both Heaven and Seraphim. At the coronation, she swore to always do what was best for Heaven, and to make sure there would always be a place for the good and the kind to go after death. Everything was well.

Then, not three months later, she got a report on her desk. Hell was overpopulated, to the point they where far larger in number than the forces of Heaven. More than that, they where gathering power through the dealing of souls. Without intervention, there was a chance a sinner could gather enough souls to challenge those of the third Triad. This was an issue.

Fine then, Sera wouldn't panic. She would go down to Lucifer and Lilith and ask them to find a solution to this issue. With her, she took Adam, the first man. The meeting did not go well.

Lilith and Lucifer stated they could not care what their subjects did, that free-will meant free-will. This did not go over well. What started as a tense but diplomatic meeting grew into a full blown argument, with Sera and Adam leaving on unhappy terms.

At a loss at what to do, Sera did not want to contact Michael. He had just retired! What would that say about her if she couldn't even last three months without his help!

Then, an idea formed. Extermination. Heaven had an overflow of weapons that Sera needed to get rid of from Michael's final mental breakdown, and they where meant to eradicate a soul. The solution seemed simple.

So, Sera sent a message to Lucifer and Lilith, asking there permission to slaughter the most powerful sinners, which the two agreed too on the condition that a list of people where not harmed. An agreement was reached, and a month later the first extermination took place.

Thank you for reading this far! I encourage any questions!

[sxskavrp]

Hello! I'm looking for some long term rp partners for Drarry. I'm 31 F, in the EST timezone. I try to be active, definitely literate, but not a stickler on length. I'm okay playing either character, I'm okay with NSFW but it's not required. Please no ABO, mpreg, or dark characters.

I have a couple of prompts I can share to see if you're interested. If you like the idea of one but want to play the opposite character, I'm totally fine with switching it up! If you don't like any of these, we can always come up with something together!

((Prince and Knight AU))

Harry kicked at the dirt with his boot as he waited idly for the Prince to arrive. He wasn't sure how well this was going to go, based on the stories he'd heard from his fellow knights. According to them, the Prince was even more of a spoiled weakling than he appeared when on the throne, and he'd already gone through five tutors so far. This was bound to be a ^^long^^ afternoon, but Harry was going to do his best to be patient. After all, he'd trained plenty of men he'd thought were hopeless, only for them to become great warriors. Surely he could teach the Prince at least some basic moves. He glanced up when he heard footsteps approaching, the very young man he'd been thinking of walking his way, the sun gleaming off his white-blonde hair.

((8th year))

So far, coming back to Hogwarts for a make up year had been unpleasant to say the least. No one wanted Draco here besides Pansy and Blaise. Even some of the professors were giving him a wide berth because of his involvement in the war. Unfortunately, he hadn't been given a choice in the matter, as finishing his education was part of his deal to avoid Azkaban. That didn’t mean he had to be happy about it. He'd done his best to lay low, but today the universe had other plans. The new Defense professor, who clearly didn't have any idea about certain social histories between the students, had just decided to pair him with Potter of all people for a project. Of course, Draco didn't hold ill feelings towards him anymore. After all, if it wasn't for him, he would be dead or imprisoned right now. But there was no way to avoid attention when someone went anywhere near Potter, and by the way the rest of the class hushed when their names were announced together, he knew this was only going to cause problems. Reluctantly, he moved to sit next to the Gryffindor so that they could start discussing their project, feeling rather awkward as they’d barely spoken a word to each other all term.

((8th year))

Harry had mixed feelings about being back at Hogwarts. On one hand, Hogwarts was his true home, and the place where he'd had some of the best times of his life, so going back was always a comfort. But it was also where he'd experienced some of his worst memories, and was the site where so many people he knew had died. Not to mention that it wasn't the same without Dumbledore, or even Professor Snape. Yet he came anyway, because Hermione and Ron were going, and he didn't know what else to do with himself. All his plans had gone topsy-turvy when he'd actually managed to survive the war, and now he was just kind of…existing, trying to figure out his next step.

It was a few weeks into term now, and he was going between classes when he spotted a group of 6th years crowding around something. No, ^^someone^^, and they were making quite a racket. He hurried over to see what was happening when he caught a glimpse of platinum blonde hair between two sets of legs. “Hey!” Harry ripped the boys away, revealing Malfoy on the ground, bruised and bleeding. Blood boiling, he put himself between the group and Malfoy protectively. “Get back, all of you!” he snapped, pulling out his wand. He knew there were a lot of people that weren’t happy Malfoy was back at Hogwarts with them, but he hadn’t realized it was this bad.

((Professors AU))

It had taken several years and a lot of soul searching, but Harry had finally realized that he was tired of fighting for a living. It was a major shock to the world, plastered on every front page. ‘The Savior Saves No More: Potter Quits the Aurors’. But Harry stuck to his guns. He wasn't going to try and fit the world's perfect vision for him anymore, and of course his friends had been more than supportive. Turns out the timing couldn't have been better because the position of DADA professor opened up at Hogwarts a few weeks later. He was quick to put in an application, and McGonagall was even quicker to bring him on. Sometimes he wondered if maybe that was a little too coincidental. Either way, he was excited to get started. There was just one caveat; Draco Malfoy was the Potions professor.

He hadn't seen Malfoy since the trials, where they'd parted on a civil but awkward note. He had no idea how it was going to be having to work with him, seeing him every day. Could they get along or would their old rivalry rear its ugly head? Needless to say, he was anxious when September 1st came around. He had decided to take the train in, for nostalgia’s sake, and so he entered with the students, finding most of the Head Table was already full. Of course there was only one seat left. And of course it had to be next to Malfoy himself.

((6th year, TW attempted suicide))

Draco took a deep inhale of the cool night air as he leaned over the railing of the Astronomy Tower. He felt like a shell of himself, as more stress piled on top of him in the transition from winter to spring. Not that it mattered, or that anyone cared. His grades were in the shitter, he barely spoke to anyone anymore, and he had no idea if his mother was alright, trapped in the Manor with his psychotic aunt and ^^him^^. His feeble attempts to kill Dumbeldore indirectly had all been thwarted. As days passed and the end of term approached, he knew he wasn’t going to finish the Vanishing Cabinet in time. It was over. The second he stepped off that train in King’s Cross, he was a dead man. Maybe he should just let Dumbledore kill him. He’d certainly make it quick and as painless as possible compared to the likely torture he’d endure from the Dark Lord. Or maybe it would be better just to get it over with himself. He knew he didn’t have to jump from this high, but he’d always had a fondness for the Astronomy Tower, the way he could see the entire grounds and the Forbidden Forest going on for miles. He could pretend he was flying for a moment, one last time, before the ground reached up to meet him. All he had to do was tip forward just a little more…

If you're interested, like this or message me 😁 I usually rp over discord.

[jedi-lothwolf]

Soultember Prompt 5: Color one from 2018 list

Fandom: The Dragon Prince

Summary: People are colorblind until you see your soulmate for the first time. Amaya never expected to be looking at her enemy as the world lit up around her.

    The breach had never looked so beautiful. It had always been a place of death and fear but right now it was lit up by color. It stunned Amaya for a moment, the color that erupted from the lava.

    The moment of admiration quickly faded to dread. Why here? Why now? Why, her? The general looked back to her opponent, a skilled Sunfire elf. She looked just as surprised.

    Then the elf drew her sword. It was colorful, the blade being different shades of, green? No yellow. It looked lively in the same way that Sairi had told her.

    Amaya drew her sword. She looked at it, curious to see how it changed. Nope still gray. Something seemed wrong about fighting the women you're destined to love.

    Even if they were soulmates they were enemies first. They attached each other but both soldiers couldn't help but get distracted. The bright colors that surrounded them, the overwhelming feeling of the world looking so different. 

    The colors were the only destination. There was something alluring about the elf. Every part of Amaya felt that this was wrong. It felt traitorous to feel that way.  

    When their fight ended Janai wandered around, taking in the sights of the world.

    Amaya wasn't going to tell anyone. But when she arrived at the base and saw Gren she couldn't help but smile. He looked good in color. His hair was definitely not what she had been expecting. It was like a lighter version of the lava.

    'What are you so smiley about?' Gren signed.

    'Just happy to see you' she replied.

    Gren smiled. That was sweet.

    Amaya's smile slowly faded. She didn't want to lie. Gren was her closest friend, she should tell him. He was unwavering in his optimism, he'd find the positive.

    Then she looked at him. She had to come to terms with it first. She couldn't tell Gren, at least not yet.

    For the next few days Amaya wondered about the elven stranger. She was a good fighter, strong, beautiful, and dangerous.

    When night fell that day, the general rode up to the breach. She knew it wasn't a good idea but, she had to know. When she got off her horse, she went to where the two had met.

    And she wasn't the only one there. The elf sat near the edge of the path. She looked gorgeous. It pained Amaya, finding beauty in Xadia. She hated it, she hated her self for it.

    Then the elf stood. Amaya waved. The soldier looked at her, "what are you doing here?" She asked.

    'Looking for you' she signed.

    "What?"

    Grabbing a piece of paper, a feather, and an ink well, Amaya questers to the ground. Unsure the elf walked over and sat down. Then the human did.

    Amaya grabbed the feather gently and wrote, 'Im deaf.'

    The elf looked at her and reached her hand out for the pen. She took it and dipped it in the ink. 'Okay'.

    Amaya took it back. 'So, you're my soulmate?'

    'And you're mine?'

    They looked at each other.

    "This alone is treason." The elf sighed.

    'It is' Amaya wrote. 'What's your name?'

    The elf grabbed the feather carefully, 'Janai.'

    'Im Amaya.'

    "Amaya" Janai said. It sounded right, saying her name. She hated it in the best way she could.

    Maybe this would be okay. Everything had to be okay. Fate wouldn't be so cruel as to connect them only to have it be impossible to love each other right?

    'Do you like color?' Amaya wrote.

    The two's hands touched as they exchanged the feather. 'I do, do you?'

    'I do. Got a favorite?'

    "I'm not sure what it's called but-' then she pointed to a color on her armor.

    'Yellow?'

    "How do you know?"

    'My sister used to tell what the colors looked like. She said it was bright and lively; the color of the sun.' 

    'Oh, you have a sister?'

    Amaya nodded sadly. She grabbed the pen and dipped it into the ink. 'She's dead.'

    "Oh, I'm so sorry."

    Amaya didn't say anything.

    Janai grabbed the pen softly, 'What's your favorite color?'

    She pointed at the color of her armor, 'blue.'

    "How did she describe blue?"

    'The color of the sky and of the ocean but also sadness.'

    Janai tried to look at the sky but clouds blocked her way. They stayed over the breach, making the area darker than the rest of the land around it.

    'If you want we can take a walk? I can tell you what color some things are. If I'm right anyway.'

    Janai looked unsure, "to do that we'd need to leave the breach."

    'Then I'll follow you'

    "Are you sure?"

    Amaya nodded. She stood up and extended her hand out for Janai.

    Janai led the way. It was the first time in nine years that Amaya had been in Xadia. It felt different being there just to talk instead of going to kill.

    Deep down she knew this wouldn't be the last time she'd be in Xadia to see Janai and the more she thought about it, the more she was okay with it. Fate would have brought them together for a reason and maybe that reason was simply to love each other.

[open-at-the-close]

Initial thoughts after reading HOFAS

There is a shit ton of information in this book and I had a lot of feelings and I'm sure I forgot plenty of things throughout the 800+ pages, but here's a start.

SPOILERS AHEAD.

First things first: all hail motherfucking Ruhn. Ruhn is hands down, without a doubt, my favorite character ever written by sjm. Honestly, he's my favorite character ever written by anyone at this point. He is the absolute best, kindest, best brother and friend anyone could ever ask for. There were moments that I feared for his life. I thought I was going to throw up when Baxian bit off his fucking hand, and when the prince of hel said he was selected as the one to die I vowed to never read another sjm book if he didn't make it. Phew, glad we dodged that one guys because I don't know if I could have upheld that claim. But seriously, this book only made me love him more and I'm thrilled at his happy ending.

On that note, basically everyone made it through this book. I mean yeah, Cormac sacrificed himself and that was sad, and jessiba traded her life, but I mean she had 15 thousand years. Everyone I care about and their friends and family made it. I am shocked. I fully expected Tharion, Baxian, maybe Ithan, or either Flynn or Declan to die. And I was bracing myself for the heartache, but they literally all survived.

Speaking of Ithan...what the hell even was that? His storyline is so strange and roundabout to me. I already thought it was weird and unnecessary that they through him loving Bryce into CC2, then he gets offered a spot as alpha, doesn't want it.. saves the mystic wolf, fucking kills her.. tried to bring her back, turns her into a reaper.. still tries to get people to follow her, even though he doesn't want the Fendrys to lead anymore and basically everyone is hinting for him to just do it himself, but no, he doesn't want to lead...and then poof he's not just an alpha he's the fucking prime. Okay pup. I like his character, sort of, but that storyline is weird.

Where the hell was the dragon the whole book? I assume Tharion's book will be the next one and we'll get some answers on that.

Speaking of my poor little Mer. His life is depressing as hell in this book. I fully didn't expect him to make it because, man he just kept taking losses. Here's to hoping he gets a better story in the next one.

I wanted more from the world merging. I loved Az and Nesta being Az and Nesta, and I loved this book, but I was annoyed with Bryce for her entire trip there and she kept making stupid decisions that led to her being on terrible terms with them and I didn't like that. I do appreciate that her and nesta ended on better terms though.

I feel like they just casually glossed over the fact that Rhysand and Bryce are basically distant cousins. He is a descendant of one sister and Bryce is a descendant of another, and that wasn't addressed at all. Neither was the fact that Ruhn looks just like Rhysand. Maybe I'm being greedy about the world collision, but I just wanted moreee.

Speaking of world colliding if we don't get a TOG spin off out of this she is just being cruel. The shifter world. Urd = wyrd. The drawings in the caves. Lidia's son is literally named after Brannon! I mean come on. Give me the unfinished stories of TOG.

I'm sure there is more I want to say, but that's all that is coming to me at the moment. Also, in case it wasn't clear, I really really loved this book.

[fountainpenguin]

Who are some of your favorite FOP characters and why? Or more specifically, what is something they character did that made you like them?

For the sake of rambling on about some of the convoluted reasons why I love these children, here's the upfront disclaimer that I'll be referencing a few of the early draft episode scripts (from Fred Seibert's Scribd); that's where the wordy screenshots are from.

[ Tagged as "long post" but same deal as usual - if I put a Read More on it, it'll crash and delete :') Sorry ]

Imaginary Gary was my first true love in terms of FOP characters. He's such a brokenhearted little 5-year-old trying to play with the big kids. His debut episode starts out so lighthearted and silly with Timmy talking about this imaginary friend who used to attend therapy with him play with him when he was 5. The tone shift you get punched with after Gary realizes Cosmo and Wanda have to grant his wishes too because "he's a part of Timmy" just hits so hard.

I also just love his debut episode because it speaks so much to me about what the show is really about at its core... Timmy got physically and emotionally wrecked by Vicky as a kid, and that's a trauma he's still recovering from. The boy is not okay.

Fanart I made the first time I watched FOP, circa 2016

"Escape from Unwish Island" is very good too, such a fantastic episode in both context and execution.

I think Mark was the second show character I fell in love with, namely around "New Squid In Town" and "Five Days of F.L.A.R.G." There's something so incredibly charming about a teenage alien prince who flees his fiancée at the altar and seeks protection from a scary rival boy... and then just, like, enjoys being human so much that sometimes Timmy shows up at his house and Mark is just hanging out in his human 10-year-old disguise. By himself. Because he likes to be 10 and human. Love that for him.

His entire character type of "surfer dude alien prince" is so funny and creative. Mark is the guy who suffers physical pain when he's hugged, but he'll hug Timmy anyway in an attempt to show Earth affection. He has such a good heart. I also enjoy his dynamic with Vicky, like how he still wants the real girl even though his parents cloned her for him in Season 2, and how he keeps making attempts to be physically affectionate with her according to American culture even though things are drastically different on Yugopotamia.

They break up at the end of "King Chang" because she finds out he's an alien, then a few episodes later in "Wishology" they're hanging out again and he tries to put his arm around her while in alien form and she's like "Don't even think about it" and he respects her rejection, and then they still get back together in Season 9 even though she blatantly knows he's an alien and she decided she was okay with it, and he just adores her so much and has ever since Season 1... he's a sweetheart.

Also this early "Foul Balled" script hits the right spot for me-

Sob... they are in LOVE, your honor.

Mark's journey to being a terrifying prince who feared a human boy to becoming Timmy's biggest fan and best friend is just really sweet. I like to imagine they become roommates later in life. Timmy has to say good-bye to Cosmo and Wanda someday, but Mark stays in touch forever.

Flappy Bob has always been a favorite of mine. The man played the perfect role of an untouchable antagonist while simultaneously doing nothing wrong. Worked hard in school, started a business, did his best to make it a pleasant place to be. Stood up for Betty when she told Gary to respect her touch boundaries, straight up chased him down to make sure he didn't cross a line... all-around great boss.

Got handed magic and wished to make the world a safe place where people could feel loved and not get hurt. After his world of peace was in effect, he walked around, did his own research, and came to his own conclusion that this wasn't working out. Apologized to Timmy for being wrong and did all he could to fix the situation. Sold his business to Gary and Betty, then left town to live his dreams.

The clown theme was a lot of fun to see in a movie, and I'm glad it was acknowledged since it would have felt weird to see him namedropped in Season 2 ("Totally Spaced Out") and then not have the clown aspect be followed through with... The Musical is my favorite episode for good reason. Absolute sweetheart, 10 out of 10. This man can do no wrong.

I don't have much to say about him beyond that, but he's a fantastic character I adore. I would have loved to have seen more of him, but he did all that he needed to do and he's perfect. Also, big shout out to Timmy for handling the interactions with Flappy with grace even though in this same season, he revealed he has a clown phobia.

H.P. is just a funny guy. He's the big boss of a race of clones who file magical paperwork and he really just wants to swing by the club and dance and hang out. Incredibly sarcastic. He'll call you "Dude." Teamed up with Anti-Cosmo and immediately dubbed him with a nickname. Successfully took over two worlds in a single day (after planning this for 37 years) and just wanted to chill in a hot tub tbh.

He's a big, sassy goofball who likes to party and he shouldn't be brushed off as "just an old guy who speaks in monotone and does dull and boring paperwork and nothing else." He is very much Not That. Fairies canonically get drunk off soda, which means we've literally seen H.P. drink on the job. Slaps high-fives and fingerguns his underlings. Smirks and snarks constantly. Respects contracts even when they don't go his way. Keeps detailed files about members of another species. Supports his employees when they join music competitions. Gave his godson a nice car and flowers and sent him on a date with a girl he'd already screwed up with.

Literally gambled all of Fairy World in a bet against a 10-year-old boy and then almost quit after like 30 seconds because he wanted to go to a rave instead. Laughs at his own jokes. Complains when his employees suck up to him. Dressed in drag to flirt with Jorgen. Straight-up lost a golf game to Timmy despite the fact he was cheating in an attempt to win. As in, like... even before Cosmo tipped the scales back into Timmy's favor, H.P. was straight-up losing slkdjfs.

He golfs in his full-on business suit. Twirls his club like a baton. His head will stick in a dartboard if you throw him hard enough, and when Jorgen used him for darts the only thing he said was "You can only imagine the joy I feel in my heart right now." He has a laser cannon in his head. Jabs his elbow into you for attention. Always being snooty with hands on his hips. Used a newborn as a yo-yo. Kidnapped a baby, then announced he wanted to name the child Bill because "Bill's a guy you'd trust with your insurance portfolio."

Went out and bought office supplies in the middle of the Fairy World Games. Won a footrace against Anti-Cosmo. Uses dollar bills as pizza toppings. Keeps chicken drumsticks in his ear. Will flap his arms and make chicken noises at you. Monotone "Go me, go me, it's my birthday." Literally makes you use enormous microscopes just to read the fine print in his contracts. Will hand you a cell phone and then call you even though you're standing in front of him. Once wore a bowler hat on top of his already existing hat.

Keeps his golf club on the table during board meetings. Likes to breakdance. Anti-Cosmo started taunting him and H.P. jumped on a scooter and said "The only thing you'll be eating today is my dust! Later dude!" and peaced out. He might be one of the oldest and most "professional" characters in the series, but in his heart he's like 21 and a total party-loving dork. He's all business on the clock and he might even pay attention to you for five minutes, but honestly he just wants to drink soda, attend raves, and do the worm. H.P. is my dear beloved and I just can't imagine not adoring this perfect man.

And he really is just Like That:

I love him so much...

I like how H.P. was totally okay with splitting the world with Sanderson when they take over... When asked WHY he wants to take over, his reply is "I'm not a hater, but I must cater, to my mission, my ambition, to be the world's administrator" and I like to interpret this as "I don't hate Fairies, but their world is disorganized and I have OCD." Oh no. His hat is also a pen.

Also the OG script shows Jorgen, Anti-Cosmo, and H.P. each choosing a contest for Timmy to judge them on so Timmy can name one of them the "best in the universe." I am obsessed with the sheer confidence of H.P. selecting one task in the universe he knew he could beat Jorgen and Anti-Cosmo at, so obviously he picks:

(Anti-Cosmo wanted to play cowboys)

This early script also depicts H.P. and Anti-Cosmo getting in a magic fight and exchanging insults like "Bring it on, meat" and "Oh no you didn't" while they shoot each other with duckzookas and magic and I need everyone to understand how much I treasure the bitter frenemy silliness that is... Them™

Idk, I feel like if H.P. had been portrayed as a younger character with the exact same personality then he'd probably be more popular in the fandom, and that's really too bad because he's freaking hilarious. He is just a guy. A dude. He's here to party and make it everybody's problem. We need way more H.P. content out there, I adore him.

Sanderson I like for many of the same reasons as H.P.- I've always loved dorky suck-up characters. Plus, Sanderson blatantly cheating at every competition he touches is funny to me. He has a similar goofy attitude to H.P. except he's also like, more vulgar and easily distracted and it's hilarious. My boy really broke a rhyme scheme to compliment his boss on the same hat he's been wearing since forever. In his mind, H.P. is just really really cool and he'll say it.

Sanderson loves music, but when he had the chance to describe himself in song form, his response was basically "Lol, I'm about to end Fairy World's whole career; bite me" and I respect that. He is just the perfect embodiment of "that suck-up who likes to drink and party with his boss, but oh wait! He also has a lot of genuine affection in his heart! But oh wait! He'll also screw you over :)" He's great.

I very much enjoy the fact that when Gary called for Pixie backup in the Musical, it was Sanderson, not H.P., who got the call. I like to think Sanderson took Gary and Betty under his wing and might be a little more attached to his dorky music-loving "godkids" than he'd like H.P. to know. H.P. gets to call the shots, but Sanderson will sneak them candy. As Gary starts sliding off the deep end in my 'fics, I think Sanderson's slowly breaking heart is one of my favorite parts of the whole arc. He really likes Gary, but his hands are tied on how much he can interfere even when his mental health comes crashing down. He's a high-up at Pixies Inc., but still can't overrule the boss's orders. It's lots of fun to play with characters who have power, badly want things, but can't take the risk to use power for the things they want.

I just love my little dynamic of Happy Peppy "I'm a pawn who can't cry in front of my godfathers" Gary and Mr. "I can't express affection in front of Gary or I'll get fired" Sanderson. There's just so much pain there to play with if you jump into FOP canon, point at Gary's call to the Pixies, and say "And I took that personally."

I also enjoy the fact that Timmy was extremely insistent that Poof needed to score "perfect 10s" on the gymnastics course in the Fairy World Games and the Pixies bribed the judges to take 1st place, which implies that it was the Pixies, not the Anti-Fairies, who scored a 10-10-9. Sanderson and H.P. are the only pixies seen on the field in that event and I would have loved to see that. Sanderson likes to be where the action is. He is hanging out.

Happy Peppy Gary and Betty are just inherently fascinating. It's pretty obvious that they know about the magical world. Even if we wave off their weird laser tech and overlook the fact that they got teleported from California to Florida, then made it back before the end of their work shifts in "Baby Face" and didn't even question it... there's a scene in the Musical where Gary picks up a phone that is blatantly labeled "Pixies" and calls Sanderson directly. My boy really went "Dad pick me up, I'm scared" slkdjf I love him.

Actually that's not true, his actual words were "Kids just being kids; they could all get hurt!" and honestly my heart. Like, I'm a full believer that the Happy Peppy duo were in on the Pixie takeover scheme even though Flappy wasn't, they are miscreants, but still... Vote Happy Peppy duo some of the sweetest and most innocent characters in FOP canon, please and thank. Ignore the times they launched babies off-screen, used lasers to cage infants, stuffed a child in a box in front of his horrified peers, and all that other stuff, that's not important. My children did nothing wrong.

I just really love thinking about all the different backstories you could write about these... extremely intense teenagers getting mixed up with magic. I favor the idea that the Pixies have always raised them the same way they raised Flappy Bob, but I think the concept of these two showing up for work one day and accidentally walking in on Pixies scheming to take over the world is equally hilarious.

I want what Gary has- I want the absolute confidence to look a crowd of kids and adults in the eye after they've just been tormented - after I'VE just been tormented - and say "Welcome back, give me money." The extent of the brand overhaul he did on the Learn-a-Torium was slapping his and Betty's names on the side and investing in giant images of their heads. He changed nothing else, not even the uniforms, and just decided to shoot his shot. I love him.

It's also VERY cute that we saw a cardboard "You must be this tall" Gary standee in "Baby Face" and I'm obsessed. This is before Gary and Betty took over, so why isn't it a Flappy standee? For some reason this cracks me up because the implication is that either Gary loves his job so much that he volunteered to be a standee model or someone else took one look at him and knew he was destined to be the smiling face of the Learn-A-Torium so they made standees of him. I love it.

I adore Gary and Betty because they make me think... To me, they're not easy to brush aside and overlook because I have a million questions, and they're cute and fun and I love them. I wonder if Vicky runs in their social circle. They probably cross paths in the babysitting field sometimes.

Also the fact that Betty is so physically affectionate with Gary on a daily basis, but the moment he turns to her for genuine comfort, she bolts out of the room, always gets me laughing. I guess it evens out, because Betty passed out in front of him once, yelling about her heart and clutching her chest, and Gary just covered his ears and screamed that the world was falling apart sdklfj. My babies.

I talk about this all the time, but Gary and Betty also have some fantastic scenes in early episode scripts that were cut from the final versions, like this gem from "Totally Spaced Out":

I love them.

Also in the early days of planning, the Musical's antagonist was actually Imaginary Gary.

While it's not confirmed that Gary and Betty sing this song since unfortunately there's no full script for the Musical available, just the first song drafts, the lyrics for the OG version of "Get Flappy" remain almost identical to the final and it's said to be sung by "Clown cheerleaders," so it seems likely that this refers to them.

I think about this a lot. I mean, if Gary and Betty are singing while Imaginary Gary reveals himself, the implication is that they found out their boss Flappy Bob was actually a 5-year-old in disguise who came out to them as an imaginary friend and they were like "Yeah, that's cool with us." For obvious reasons I don't treat the Imaginary Gary plot as canon in my 'fics, but like... They accepted him. Man.

Like... I can never express how much I enjoy the BFF dynamic that is "I'll keep working here even though our boss is 5 and imaginary, I'll run away to Mexico with you, I'll run a business with you when our boss skips town, I'll catch you when you jump in my arms, but if you want genuine comfort then BOI I'm walkin' out." Betty sdjklf

On that note, I feel like something does need to be said about Gary seeking comfort from Betty when scared and her response is "But I don't like you like that!" She obviously felt like she needed to clarify that and I have so many questions about their relationship. Ignoring for a moment the obvious need to transition to a new scene, it's just not a good look for Gary that Flappy felt the need to chase them and mediate. Is Gary okay. Does he need to be held. My son.

Anyway Gary and Betty have my heart and they know it- they fascinate me and I love them very dearly. I feel bad for the fact that literally every fanfic scene I've put them in is just a horrible downward spiral of their relationship and sanity; I'm pretty sure I've never actually been nice to them, and honestly that's terrible slkdjf

Foop will be ranked at the top of my fave characters for forever and a day. He's just a messed up little sweetheart ping-ponging between being socially awkward in school, hanging out with his loser friends, and struggling against the desire to consume the world in a black hole. He's just struggling so hard and there's, like... no one giving him actual help and it's heartbreaking, but also you don't feel too bad for him because he also has a healthy social life and he's doing okay.

There are something like... 5 or so episodes where you can see Foop's alternate personality take over and I'm just happy that the alt personality thing wasn't pushed as a reason for his destructive behavior. The alter is focused on a little when Foop is freshly out of solitary confinement, comes up again when he's going to school, but all the other appearances are a lot more subtle and just showcased in later episodes by Foop getting that extra highlight in his eyes and gushing over things ("Oh, goody! I found a spot on my body where I wasn't bitten by a spider!" which... isn't the same way Foop speaks when he's in pain any other time in the series, because usually when he's hurt, he'll moan, grump, or panic). It is interesting to me.

Anyway I'm just very happy that the alter wasn't a one-episode gag "played for laughs" who then got thrown aside like nothing happened. Rather, the alter features majorly in two episodes (or three if you want to make an argument for "Terrible Twosome"), then quietly becomes part of Foop's character in a few episodes after that.

We saw extremely valid reasons for where this alter came from. Foop was locked in solitary confinement from the day he was born, developed claustrophobia, accidentally yeeted himself into an alternate dimension for an unconfirmed amount of time while the timestream was frozen for 50 years, and although there's a certain humor in his alternate personality (like when said alter rigged the class president vote for the wrong person) there's also just... this quiet melancholy to the whole experience, this very legitimate childhood trauma that Foop is recovering from... Yikes.

Also this comes later in his life, but he also experienced other fun childhood events such as being tortured with magical shocks while trying to escape a bully and also that one time in Season 8 when the Fairy Council ripped him out of reality. Foop is not okay.

Anyway, Foop's alter is there for him while he adjusts to life outside of solitary confinement and again when he starts a stressful first day of school, and after that he becomes a smaller aspect of Foop's attitude that you can still see in later episodes when he's stressed. Like yknow, that time he literally saw the Grim Reaper and got told how he'll die, I also would probably struggle emotionally with that.

Foop is great- he'll bribe you to spare his life with a dollar bill and he'll still ask if he can keep the change. Disaster child. He's a struggling little kid who's struggling with massive amounts of trauma and doesn't seem to have much of a relationship with his parents. At least Anti-Wanda packs anti-venom in his Kelly Clarkson lunchbox, so I'm glad they're on good terms. Overall, Foop is such a goofy character with a harsh backstory, a difficult family life, a criminal record, and high political expectations and he's also a bad boy evil genius, so like... He's the best kind of character type. But he also has silly subplots where he spends hours TP'ing a house because he forgot he had magic (twice), he loves making prank phone calls, and he freaks out when Crocker doesn't invite him to a party. His dialogue is always fantastic and I really enjoy when he's onscreen.

The downward spiral of his mental state when being tortured with lightning and forced to team up with Vicky in "Scary Godcouple" to the point that he stops caring about anything, straight-up ready to let her kill Poof even though he'll ALSO die just... Man. Hits hard. This happens after "Timmy's Secret Wish" where Foop was violently yanked out of reality. He already ceased to exist once and begged for life again, and then the forced team-up with Vicky happens and he just... can't. He can't.

He screams and begs and finally surrenders to it all, right up until seconds before Poof dies. Finally he lashes out at Vicky and blasts her with magic, gets tortured because of it... This boy is not okay. My man be STRUGGLING. And then the fact that he had to face Vicky AGAIN in "Certifiable Super Sitter" and he just did not trust her for a single second... ouch. The emotional arc of Foop saying "Ooh, I really like her :D!" in his first encounter with Vicky to Foop throwing himself in front of her chainsaw to save Chloe in their last...... Love that.

The Crocker / Dark Laser / Foop friendship is important to me. I just want Foop to have adults in his life who care at least a little about his well-being. He has very few people to turn to... Chloe made him cry with a hug, the boy struggles so hard with healthy affection. He might be a destructive force of chaos but he's also just baby.

I also just really like Foop's dialogue; he's this posh British boy genius who will get extremely worked up about how "For the record, if he HAD thrown a lightning bolt, it would have been done in protest over being asked to participate in this candy-coated farce that you call theater!" but he's also like 5 so he'll just groan about how things are "Super lame" and it's adorable. He has a certain twang to his speech where he'll "spit" these single-word sentences like "Wow" and "REALLY?" and "SERIOUSLY!?!?" and I just find him both refreshing and easy to write. He's so loud and so very cute.

This kid literally runs around on the playground eating poisonous spiders while trying to pick up girls by comparing them to potassium chloride, he'll also distract his teacher by pointing at the window and yelling "A van of rich single men!!" where else can I go to experience this character type, he's the best. He booked a restaurant for Cosmo and Wanda at a black hole. When will I ever be this funny.

Also I cry over the fact that Foop corrected Goldie every time she called him by the wrong name - from the day she came to class to the day they held the play - until he finally screams that his name "isn't that difficult!" and honestly just the fact that he had to deal with that is interesting to me. Goldie knew Poof's name, she memorized her lines in a play... there's no way she "forgot" his name. She was doing that on purpose. In his debut, Foop made it clear multiple times that he hates his name, but he also stood up for himself when misnamed. Love that.

It's also extremely funny that in "Spellementary School," Foop reveals he's never been able to understand anything Poof says and he just has to guess all the time, yet he's also shown to be extremely accurate in recognizing when Poof is grumpily agreeing with him, arguing with him, or straight-up swearing at him and I love that about their relationship. The scene in "Two and a Half Babies" where Foop assures Poof that he can be trusted because he's "not a pathological liar" and Poof just looks at him sadly and says "Poof poof" and Foop backpedals with "You're right, I am; I lied about that" is v funny to me.

Nonverbal popular kid and the boy who needs someone to talk to for the absolute win. They are bonded for life... Good luck, Poof.

I also really like Poof, especially in "Love Triangle" when he screws Foop over by making him take over as understudy and then he just eats popcorn while Foop fumbles around onstage. Comedy gold. Poof is sweet and forgiving, but he's also a straight-up savage and he knew EXACTLY what he was doing. Love him for that. As good as he is, he still has that wild streak the same way that Foop has a secret soft spot for people. Poof doesn't mean to cause trouble except for the times when he definitely DOES mean to cause trouble and it's hilarious.

Poof has a certain "looks like a cinnamon roll, but could kill you" vibe. He's this kindhearted little boy who's very cautious and sweet and you can just imagine what a little gentleman he'll be when he grows up. I love how the first thing he did when he met Chloe was tip his crown at her, the sweetheart.

He'll jump into new adventures. He'll play along. He'll help you out. Yet while all of this is going on, you can see how when he's scolded - either when it's being scolded for "not forgiving people after they try to destroy you" or Timmy yelling that getting them both stuck in a spider's web is all his fault or even just Wanda telling him to calm down because he was getting so worked up when he was unable to articulate what he wanted to say......

Poof doesn't know how to stand up for himself in those situations. He holds himself to this standard of respecting authority even when he's overworked to the point of exhaustion. When he was assigned as godparent to Mrs. Crocker, he went into it with a good attitude but came home wiped out. Didn't voice a single complaint. Just exhausted. Didn't know what to say.

Meanwhile, Foop will flip the heck out if you accuse him of anything and I really enjoy that... Here are two counterparts, and you've got one kid who struggles to speak up so he usually just keeps his head down, and then you've got Captain Overshare who will outright lie and throw blame on other people and it's just... nice to see the personalities of two opposite creatures truly be opposite like that.

There's definitely something to be said about how when Poof finally started talking in sentences, it was while dueling Crocker in a magic fight. The poor kid had been been begging for others to step in and get Crocker out of Spellementary School for two days. No one was there for him. Poof got backed in a corner and had no choice but to challenge Crocker himself. Kid got blasted with magic lightning, slammed into a wall twice, and finally pushed himself off the floor and stood up for himself. Good on ya, kiddo. He WILL get in a physical fight to protect himself or others, but if he's in a situation where he needs to say "Hey, I'm struggling with this assignment" or "No, I'd rather not hug the guy who tried to kill me last time we met" then oh heck no, absolutely not, he'd rather die skldfj.

Poof finally spoke and the second sentence out of his mouth was "Your plan to absorb all the magic from my friends and Foop has failed" slkdfj. Tell us how you really feel. And then after Foop apologized for a lifetime spent trying to kill him, Poof still tried to extend the hand of friendship, my heart...

Also, the dynamic of "I blatantly do not like Foop, but I tolerate him because he's my cousin / counterpart / classmate" is very funny. Poof doesn't usually go out of his way to hurt Foop, but he absolutely sits back to watch Foop create problems for himself. If Foop launches a spiked ball at him, he'll fling it right back at him instead of eliminating it. He also accidentally pushed Foop into a garbage can one time and chose to leave him there instead of helping him. Love that.

Poof's great, I love his vibe. He's neither a brat nor a goody-goody... He's just this shy little kid who was born a celebrity and has to deal with everything that comes with that, like attracting a crowd of friends at school and being nominated class president. He's sweet with a streak of mischief... He'll go along with a plan to steal Cupid's arrows, he'll eat all your brownies, and he'll also eat 11 pounds of chocolate just because he wants it. He has his share of chaos, but he's a lot more thoughtful and controlled about it than Foop is. Needlessly dramatic and likes doing things with a flair <3

Woo... This post became much longer than intended, yikes. I'll wrap it up, but Juandissimo, Kevin, Norm, Crocker, Ed Leadly, Chester, A.J., Elmer, Sanjay, Binky, Jorgen, and Dr. Rip Studwell, are all such fantastic characters too, just to name a few off the top of my head. There's a special place in my heart for Chet Ubetcha, Mr. Bickles, Schnozmo, Chloe, Molly, Dark Laser, Cosmo, Wanda, Anti-Cosmo, Anti-Wanda, Blonda, Schnozmo, Remy, Mama Cosma, Big Daddy, and Sammy Sweetsparkle too. And Timmy himself, but I think that goes without saying.

So many funky dudes; I love them so much...

[sburbian-sage]

Hey, DurationPrince here and it's been a while.

Good news, I got out of the time bubble outside of time thing! It just took me to accept that it's okay that everything will eventually end (Except I guess the misery that is this looping but I disgress)

Thankfully, I got back a second to after that bubble casted, so I wasn't missing. I explained the situation, and the waste of rage agreed to make a temporary truce, and make both of us lead the fight for the Black king.

And that's where I... we Need your help- What strategies or methods you think a Prince of Time and a Waste of Rage can do to deal a finishing blow on the Black King? It's very stacked, a 6-Fold Session with a goddamn Programming Book prototyped in it, so it can predict our short-term moves.

And before you ask, the two abilities of [Infinite Rage] and [In The End] are out, the waste... wasted some much enegry on that, his lifeforce can't handle it again, And [In The End] seems to only work on PLAYER Effects, ala showdown abilities and such.

OH SHIT?!? DURATIONPRINCE IS FINALLY FREE? HELL YES. HELL FUCKING YES. I am also glad that your coplayer is no longer attempting to kill you.

Now, how to fight a Black King that can predict your moves?

Standard Grand Melee stuff. Grind out whatever quests and Revelawesomes you can for more late-game abilities. Alchemize like a motherfucker. Not just the strongest weapons and armor you can must, but support items, bombs, health, etc.

After a while of you two having a rivalry, you should not only discuss what abilities you two share, but try to do training exercises to synchronize and find synergy. If you have the time, try to forge an Unbreakable Union to unlock your Unite Synchronization. A Unite Synchronization between a Waste of Rage and a Prince of Time should be killer.

A Prince and a Waste will have some incredible firepower, and while you intend to be the vanguard (and finisher), everyone should be pulling their weight. It's easy for someone to randomly die in this fight. No showboating, make sure everyone looks out for each other.

If the BK can predict your moves, it might be worth using attacks and tactics that can't be avoided or blocked. Even if you see a nuke coming, it's a bit difficult to escape the blast radius. Traps and "setting up a deathblow" would similarly fall into this category.

Your ability to speed up a player's abilities might be useful in getting them to instantly trigger or hit before they can be predicted and avoided. I know [In The End] is infinitely nuanced and I'm missing some profound complication in how it actually works, but you're a Prince of Time, man.

Is it possible to jam that predictive ability? If it reads your mind, wear tinfoil hats. If it's basically running a computer program, can you EMP to shut it down? Can you predict what you can't see? If you know what ability it has, you can surely probe for weaknesses, no?

Finally, even with the best-laid plans things can still go terribly wrong. Strategize to the best of your abilities, but remember to be yourself and have fun when excrement hits the spinning air ventilation device.

[ayellowcurtain]

“Is everything okay between us?” Wilhelm asks.

It’s a rhetorical question but it feels wrong not to double-check with Simon about how he’s feeling. They’ve been getting on and off a roller coaster for the past few years, especially the last few months since they became a public domain situation.

Sure, they have much more support than Wilhelm’s pessimistic brain would ever dream of, but it comes with a price, of course.

And he must admit – Simon has said this a few times – how being the Crown Prince can bring out the worst in him to the surface more often. After the last few weeks, Wilhelm hopes Simon understands it has nothing to do with power, and everything to do with him having very strong boundaries he’s not willing to negotiate which makes two of them.

Wilhelm doesn’t think he is a bad person.

Eric was a better person and a perfect fit but he’s not here. And Wilhelm will have to learn to live with that, and with the fact that he’s what they got, and maybe he is a fighter with low patience and lots of anxiety that is constantly fucking everything up, making Eric and Simon think less of him.

He feels like he’s been paying high prices for everything. This stupid crown makes his life worse, but Wilhelm is ready to use every inch of privilege he has to make them have a good, calm, very private life.

Simon nods his head without thinking twice but his eyes are still full of doubt like he’s the one asking.

Is everything okay between us?

And Wilhelm moves closer to his boyfriend, the tip of their noses almost touching.

“With everything we’ve been through, you’re the one thing I’ve always been completely certain of and more than okay with.”

He tries to transpire with his soft words how much he really means it. How Simon makes his heart beat fast, but also makes Wille’s heart grow bigger, warmer, and brighter, more capable of love every time Simon looks at him for a split second.

Simon is a fast learner, and Wilhelm watched and felt how much being a “public figure” changed him. Not for the worse because Wilhelm can’t believe Simon will ever change, for anyone, or anything, but he’s living proof of how this type of life can…prune your edges to fit a mold.

The mold is made to make you feel comfortable in the uncomfortable life they have ahead, constantly being told what to do, how to act, what words to use, and what hands to shake.

They quickly became a strong unit, especially with going back to school and having some formal and small events to go to as Crown Prince.

Wilhelm became even more protective of Simon, and their relationship. He stood his ground that Simon would go to important meetings, would never give any interviews if he didn’t feel like it, and that Simon would be able to use as much of Wilhelm’s privileges as possible.

If his mom and her entire entourage wanted Wilhelm to proceed as her successor, he would do it under his terms, and Wilhelm doesn’t think his terms are unreasonable.

Simon, his family, their privacy, and their relationship were his priorities, he would make decisions with those things in mind.

August wasn't getting away with what he had done just because the Queen saw him as family still.

And Wilhelm thought about saying fuck it, stepping back just to have a good view when everything falls burning with August as Crown Prince. That’s a terrible reason to decide to be a king but yes, maybe he did decide to go forward as a Crown Prince because he’s too bitter to let August have anything good, ever.

He beat August as much as he could until his knuckles and wrists were sore, and he reminded him at every opportunity that not only was August not fit for the role, but he would never get it.

“I made that decision on my own, and everything good and bad that comes with it…and I will respect your decision if that’s too much for you.” He tells Simon one more time, pushing one curl back so the sunlight can brighten Simon’s eyes a bit.

He told Simon that he had made up his mind, and Simon wasn’t against it, didn’t argue nor looked disappointed in him. And they have lived with that decision for a couple of weeks, with Wilhelm trying to show Simon that they would manage a private, happy life.

For good and bad, living in a castle, and studying in a very closed environment helped him show Simon they were going to be alright in the “real” world too.

Simon smiles shyly at him, holding the front of his shirt.

“I’m not going anywhere.”

He’s been trying to make it a fairy tale for Simon, sleeping in the same bedroom, having a private bathroom, and asking for whatever food they feel like eating late at night.

Sure, there were vague and shallow threats against him that made those decisions easier to obtain but he would never complain about more privacy, moving Simon’s family to some fancy house in some fancy neighborhood that some old cousin from his great-grandmother lived a few centuries back or whatever.

It wasn’t an easy argument with Simon. He’s a very proud guy with very strong opinions but he’s also extremely impatient, and he does not like paparazzi.

Since he can’t fight the system, Wilhelm’s mindset is basically: fuck the monarchy while using every possible privilege it can provide to me, and Simon. If you can’t win, join what it can provide. And don’t let August have anything.

“Love shouldn’t be this difficult,” Simon whispers, and Wilhelm frowns.

“Is it difficult for you to love me?”

He teases, asking for a kiss, and Simon rolls his eyes, kissing him softly.

Wilhelm opens his eyes, still feeling their lips glued together, slowly breaking apart.

“It was never difficult to love you.” Wilhem reveals, and pretends to think for a second, “Unless when you were shoving your cute little, tiny hands inside someone else’s pants!”

“Shut up!” Simon pushes him, trying to cover Wille’s mouth with his hand. “You deserved that!”

“What?! No, I didn’t!”

“Yes, you did,” Simon answers in that sassy voice of his, resting his chest on Wille’s, running his fingers through his bright hair.

“You know, we’ll probably have a ton of castles to look at and choose to live if we want…”

“Is your mom’s too small for you, Crown Prince?”

Wille smiles at his boyfriend, “No! It’s just…well, hers.”

“You want something for you?”

“For us, yes. I’m a very selfish man, you should know that by now.”

“So, no open relationship for us…You know, in a castle, we can fit a thousand other people. Your mom would love that!” It’s Simon’s turn to tease, knowing it’s probably a trigger for Wilhelm. He’s indeed a very passionate, monogamous person.

“I will kill you.”

Simon smiles wide, laughing while kissing Wille’s face as it gets increasingly red with the thought.

[pub-lius]

happy 4th of july, here's lafayette pt. 1

i hope you're all excited for this edition of appeasing @thereallvrb0y because he's my son. i haven't finished the research for this so im gonna be doing that as i go, but i have. so. much. information on this man. and by that i mean im limiting it to just two of my books that have info on him, Lafayette by Harlow Giles Unger, and The Marquis Lafayette Reconsidered by Laura Auricchio. I highly recommend both of these, individually or together. okay let's go

Early Life in Chavaniac

Marie Joseph Paul Yves Roch Gilbert du Motier, Marquis de Lafayette was born into a noble, provincial family that belonged to the Nobility of the Sword, meaning they earned their titles through military achievements, on September 6, 1757 in Chavaniac, France. His childhood home was the Chateau de Chavaniac which had 18 rooms, so he was always rich. The countryside was referred to as the Auvergne, so if you hear the term "Auvergne nobility/princes/princesses", they mean hillbilly rich people.

Gilbert/Lafayette (which are the two names for him I will be rotating between) had this dad named Roch-Gilbert, Marquis de Lafayette, who was killed in the Seven Years War at the Battle of Minden, and that made young Gilbert want to be a solider. Roch-Gilbert was one of many generations in his family to die in historical (mostly military) events.

Roch-Gilbert, however, was the first of his line to marry into the Nobility of the Court, which are old money people who are just rich because they were born that way, and they have direct ties to the royal family. The Nobility of the Court lived in Paris and Versailles for the most part, and looked down heavily on the Auvergne nobility the same way Elon Musk would look down on someone like Shane Dawson.

The senior Marquis de Lafayette married Marie-Julie de La Rivière, who was from a very prestigious family that were very well connected (included some members of the Order of Saint Louis for military service). Since she was Nobility of the Court, she spent a lot of her time in Paris, and was pretty absent from her son's life.

Despite this, Lafayette was still raised primarily by women. His grandmother was the head of the household at the chateau, and took care of all family matters. His two aunts and an older female cousin helped to raise the little marquis.

He was a feisty little kid too. I'm sure if you've been around for a while in Lafayette spaces you've heard the story of the Beast of Gèvaudan. Basically there were some rumors going around that there was a scary monster roaming the countryside killing people and animals. Lafayette, who was about 6 at the time, gathered his gang of friends to go kill it, but never found it. The going theory was that it was a starving wolf.

"I recall nothing in my life that preceded my enthusiasm for glorious tales or my plans to travel the world in search of renown." -Lafayette, 1780

Move to Paris

Lafayette traveled to accompany his mother in Paris in December 1767, which was a massive change for a ten year old. Paris was a huge city full of people richer than him, and at this time, he wasn't used to not being the richest person in the room.

Lafayette's tutor, Abbè Fayon, accompanied him on the journy. Up until this point, Fayon was focused on teaching Lafayette tradition, and everything he needed to know to uphold his rank, such as the history of their lineage, a little bit of Greek and Latin, and more necessary information to become an army officer and feudal landholder, as that was the system France was still under: lords owning large portions of land and allowing peasants to leave and work on them for an exchange of a portion of the profit. (spoiler alert: this doesn't end well). Fayon would remain in Lafayette's employ from the rest of his life.

In Paris, Lafayette would be surrounded with Enlightenment philosophy, which only turned his ambition into rebelliousness as he went into his teenage years.

Lafayette first attended the Collége du Plessis, where he had a close group of friends who looked up to him and generally did whatever he said. There was one time where they didn't, when Lafayette "wanted to mount a revolt to prevent the unjust punishment of one of my comrades... I was not as well-supported as I might have hoped." -Lafayette, "Autobiographie".

Lafayette was very skilled in Latin rhetoric, and won a prize for it (though did not win the university wide competition, which was disappointing). This sparked a fascination with Republican Rome, and he eventually started reading the works of Louis-Sébastien Mercier, who would become a heavy influence.

When he was 13, he was secured a place in the Black Musketeers by his great-grandfather, Comte de La Rivière. The Black Musketeers were soldiers of the King's guard. Lafayette was very excited for the appointment, but later realized it was ceremonial.

He had been thrilled "to ride to Versailles in full uniform to hear the king tell me... that he had nothing to order, and to report back to the commander of the musketeers the same news that was repeated to him three hundred and sixty-five days a year." -"Autobiographie"

(side note: "Autobiographie" is one of Lafayette's memoirs. He began one in 1780, and finished another later on.)

Lafayette's mother and grandfather both died in 1770, leaving him with a vast inheritance and more mommy issues. His greatest income, after he inherited all the older generations' properties, was around 130,000 livres per year, and, in a society where a skilled employer with a steady income earned around 1,000 lives per year, this was, in academic terms, a shit ton of money. This is why people say Lafayette was the richest man in France at the age of 12.

With all this money, the focus became on getting Lafayette in the court, which meant he would have to get married sooner rather than later. That's around when he was introduced to Marie Adrienne Francoise de Noailles.

The Noailles family is like. the most important family besides the royal family in the Court of Versailles. This family is like literally the court. Adrienne's father was one of Louis XV's closest advisors, the family belonged to several chivalric orders, and they had direct connections to both Louis XVI and Marie Antoinette.

It is very abnormal that a family like this would marry one of their daughters to a provincial nobleman, but Lafayette was a really strange case. He was. unnecessarily rich. Like there is no other Auvergne nobleman who made this amount of money. France also used the dowry system, and Adrienne's father, Duc d'Ayen had five daughters he would need to pay dowries for- but he wouldn't have to give Lafayette a dowry because he was SO. FUCKING. RICH.

Adrienne was the second of Duc d'Ayen's daughters, and he wanted to marry off her and her older sister as soon as possible. However, the Duchesse refused to let him marry her TWELVE YEAR OLD DAUGHTER, and this caused a lot of issues between them.

"You don't know my wife. No matter how bitterly she argues, she'll apologize like a rueful little girl if you show her she is wrong, but she will never budge if she doesn't see it." -duc d'Ayen

"My mother and father were constantly quarreling- and refused to tell us why." -Adrienne

The duchesse was entirely right btw, and the duc was really creepy! she also just didn't want to be separated from her children. there's just so many tragic situations here and all the time in the french court

Eventually, Adrienne's parents agreed to post pone the marriage for two years, so Adrienne and Gilbert were married when he was 16 and she 14. However, in the meantime, they were completely unaware that the marriage was happening.

“The two marriages were arranged [Adrienne’s aforementioned sister was being married at the same time to Vicomte de Noailles], but only on condition that no one was to mention them to my sister before a year had passed and to me before eighteen months. My mother agreed that Monsieur de Noailles and Monsieur de Lafayette would meet us haphazardly from time to time, either at my mother’s home or on walks. But my mother did not want us to be distracted from our education.” -Adrienne de Lafayette

During those eighteen months, Adrienne developed a major crush on Gilbert, but he was more focused on organizing his little friendgroup's shenanigans.

That wouldn't last long because Gilbert moved into the Noailles mansion at Versailles in February 1773, and was enrolled in the Académie de Versailles. This was a school for very high ranking noblemen, including Princes of the Blood, which is what relatives of the royal family were callled.

Gilbert was embraced by the Noailles' as a son, and he was very happy to have a family again. However, as we shall soon see, Lafayette didn't quite live up to the duc's expectations for a Noailles son.

Lafayette and Adrienne had a very grand wedding, but were not permitted to consummate their marriage for some Catholic reason I forgot, but it was a gateway for Lafayette to enter to King's court for the first time. More about that next time on the Disney channel

[the1northlanderprincess]

A Curse for True Love

A note: Apologies for the sudden onslaught of Evajacks posts. This is what happens when you discover a series so late in the game.

After waiting for it for 2 1/2 weeks, I finally got to read A Curse for True Love. I have to spill all the feels I am feeling over this series, because they are many.

While not as good as BONA, there is still some really good material. This love story is one of the best that you can get from books that resemble fairytales. There is something so profound about it, and deep. I mean, you have the fact that you get both Evangeline and Jacks being victims of curses and danger. It was a true fight for true love. It reminded of some of my favorite fictional couples.

For the cursed angle, it was giving Captain Swan (but done better...yeah, I said it), as well as Snowing. With Jacks pushing Evangeline away to keep her safe from him, it was very similar to Dimitri pushing Rose away in Spirit Bound and Last Sacrifice, which I love. Let me add, Jacks watching Evangeline and longing from afar was reminiscent of Peter watching Mary Jane after being rescued in SM2, and the ending scene of the CW BatB pilot. I need more literature like that.

I just love the simplicity of this series. It's so straightforward; nothing convoluted like you see in certain romantasies. And I believe I saw a booktuber (at least I think it was this series) say that the stakes are more realistic and higher**, which I have to agree with. You have the FMC trying to find a second love she can be happy with, seemingly finds it, then becomes enamored with the MMC. She knows that he is unable to be with her, but is determined to find a way to be with him. With the MMC, he's wanted love, thought he found it, but she backstabbed him. Now he's bitter, and does nefarious things. However, he slowly falls for the FMC unexpectedly, but doesn't want to hurt her, thus pushing her away. It all changes when she is killed, and he goes back in time to fix it because of how much he loves her. But it all goes wrong when the FMC's false love takes her memories. Fast forward to MMC trying to thwart the husband, or any way FMC may be endangered, trying to protect her so she can live. However, he is going to make sure he doesn't try to interact with her too much, and makes plans to disappear from her life forever. It hurts him immensely, but, like before, feels he has to. She regains her memories, discovers his plans, and she has a race against time before he destroys the thing that allows him to love. There is lots of begging, confessions, pushing/pulling, and the like. She makes a move and BAM! Curse lifted. Only, after all of that, the false love kidnaps her and MMC has to still fight to be with her. Totally no big deal, right? LOL.

What I liked about the curse breaking is that they both had to believe in their love. At first I was confused as to why the cuff hurt him when Jacks tried to kiss Evangeline, but it's because that his second heart isn't in close proximity, so, he wasn't in his right mind. He probably didn't think she loved him the way he loved her. Subconsciously he likely did, yet it wasn't until she said those words and risked her life to physically show him.

Anyway, my whole point is this: Evajacks has now topped Feysand within my top 3 book OTPs in terms of overcoming odds and development. Seriously, the guy was going to destroy his ability to feel because he couldn't bear losing her again...at his hand. That is real sacrifice. What Rhysand did pales in comparison.

Anyway, here's my top 10 book couples.

Top 10 Book OTPs:

Romitri***-Vampire Academy

Haven and Stolas-Kingdom of Runes

Evajacks-Once Upon a Broken

Feysand-A Court of Thorns and Roses

Chaolaena (so fight me)-Throne of Glass

Warnette (gosh, this was hard to place so low)-Shatter Me

Kane and Arwen-A Dawn of Onyx

Jurdan-The Cruel Prince

Mac and Jericho-Fever series

Sera and Ash (would have been higher if not for Fire in the Flesh)-Flesh and Fire

**Edit: Okay, I lied; it was a different book. But, the belief still stands. Also, unlike the booktuber, I don't see this as a guilty-pleasure series

***Romitri is the first book couple I fell in love with. They have to be number one, no matter how I feel about the others.

[profounddefendorcrusade-blog]

Debunking the “Lancer is a little kid” belief

After years and years of not shipping anything (not in video games, movies, or TV shows), I finally came across a particular pairing in Toby Fox's "Delatrune" that immediately caught my attention. In case you're still guessing even after reading the title, I'm talking about Susie and Lancer here. Specifically, how Lancer is portrayed in the Delatrune fandom.

Now, what you're about to read is me being as objective as possible, but if you still see Lancer as a literal kid (even after the very last point, taken straight from the game itself), go on and believe what you want to. I mean, isn't that what works of fiction or supposed to be about? Letting our creativity flow and taking whatever we want to take from the actual work, so that we can interpret it in any way we want to? I won't even stop you from posting hate comments (they're inevitable). Just prepare yourselves for a reality check, folks.

Enough rambling. Let's get straight to the point. And that point is that whenever I went on the internet to look for fanart/fanfiction of these two, I could barely find any for one reason: 99% of the fandom saw the pairing as pedophilic. I must stop you all right there. Let's take a not-so-well-deserved break from my little discussion and look up the term 'pedophilia.'

In short, a pairing can’t be pedophilic if neither one of the characters is an adult. Or, if they're in a romantic, but non-sexual relationship. Like, you can call a couple with an age gap weird/gross all you want, but if it's not sexual, the term 'pedophilia' doesn't apply. That's my whole point. Except... Susie and Lancer are *peers.*

About Lancer's height. Saying that he's a child just because he's short is like saying Papyrus is much older than Sans just because Sans is short (heck, if you compare the heights, you'll see he's even shorter than Lancer, and yet Sans is an adult, and no one has ever questioned it).

Let's look at an actual example: Monster Kid/Teen. I found a picture containing them as a child (right) and teenager (left). See the difference? Okay. 

Now, I did the same thing for Lancer, and... if he were a child, he'd look something like this:

If you look up an actual height comparison for every character in the game, you’ll see how Lancer and Monster Teen are the same height (Kris and Ralsei too as far as I can tell). Still not convinced? Let's look at Susie. Most people follow this logic: She is taller and, therefore, must be older than Lancer. To that, I say: she's a dinosaur-like monster; of course, she will be taller than the others. Who knows how tall she'll be as an adult? As for Lancer: his dad may be tall, but that doesn't automatically mean he will be as huge as him when he grows up. Nothing weird about that.

Now Let's look at Lancer's personality. He's an immature and spoiled prince, but for a good reason: he spent his entire life being treated as a baby/toddler/child before he met Susie. No wonder he lacks confidence, needs 'babysitters', and is terrible with directions. Lancer... doesn't know any better. He's never been told that he can be his own individual. He's never been told that he isn't useless. That he doesn't need protection. Remember when Lancer told Susie that he had never eaten the Dark Candy hanging way too high on the tree because he wasn't allowed to get it himself, and she decided to let him try it even though she was hungry? Or when he stated that he wasn't allowed to swear? Lancer was even surprised that the trio's "collective dad" "lets them" swear. I'm sure people growing up in a strict household would understand when I say how this doesn't explicitly have to do anything with Lancer's biological age, just his upbringing. And Susie trying to get (the word they used was not 'teach,'  just 'get') him to swear more is similar to what some of my friends do sometimes when I'm too shy - get me out of my shell. That doesn't make me younger than I am. She teaches Ralsei sarcasm too in CH2, and I don't see anyone treating him like a little kid.

There's an interesting post about this here on Tumblr (https://at.tumblr.com/rainy-poppy/lancer-is-literally-a-child-why-are-you-shipping/d3kpxj3hpn1j). Basically, the person is saying that Susie, being the tough badass she is, wouldn't be hanging out with an actual child (despite calling him 'kid,' which I'll be getting to after this). Let's look at Anne and Sprig's friendship in Amphibia for a second since both of their ages are confirmed. She's 13. He's 10. The difference between Susie and Anne here is that Susie was a bully. Someone who was actually threatening, and not just a typical, friendly teenage girl like Anne. A bully like Susie would NOT willingly team up with a child. Instead, she'd say something like: "Whatever, kid. Scram!". Not only that, but she would not threaten to bite a child's face off, or beat him up (Lancer was literally the first person she actually beat up, according to what Monster Teen and Snowy tell us about never having seen her do it to anyone before), try to kill him twice (and almost succeed the second time), or call him 'man,' 'dude,' 'idiot,' and a 'wannabe tough guy.' And Lancer's face? I don't know if it's a joke. If it is, I'll ignore it, but if that's his actual face, then no. Him being a child is impossible. And considering that he has already made this particular face three times (once in CH1 and twice in CH2), I'm pretty sure it's canon. I can't get behind how someone could look at this face and think "That's a baby/toddler/little boy!" I seriously can't.

And it's not just that. We see that he and Susie made a literal game in which we (Kris) and Ralsei are supposed to ‘thrash our own ass’. I don’t know about you, but I highly doubt a child would have the mental capacity to contribute to the project or keep up with Susie in general. Additionally, Lancer shows an uncharacteristic level of maturity, ordering his troops to imprison us. Heck, they put him as the king of the entire Card Kingdom! Would they have put a 10-year-old on the throne? If they were smart, then no, of course not! Rouxls Kaard would have been in charge instead until Lancer was old enough. The comment one of the Rudinns made about him being their new king went something like: "We didn't know who to make our new king. Lancer's always been annoying, but seeing how nice he treats you guys, I think he'll be fine". There isn't a single mention of him not being old enough. The only canon information we have about Lancer’s age is that he isn’t old enough to ride a motorcycle, so he’s 15 max. Not an adult, but not a child either. And considering how the rest of the gang are teens, he is at least 13 (although, this is still too young imo).

Lancer understands the concept of death damn well; he just doesn't let it bother him. A child would scream, beg, cry, or run away in terror if someone threatened or tried to kill them, or become paralyzed from fear. He was even willing, no, EXPECTING to die during the Susie fight and said "Susie, you... you missed." He was willing to make this sacrifice just to keep her safe from his dad. The same guy who only used to care about being useful to King and making him proud (despite clarly having a soft heart) finally found something more imporant than proving himself, and that's having, being, and remaning a true friend to the end. This is both heartbreaking and beautiful. And from this one scene on, Lancer's remained 100% loyal to his friends, especially Susie (but also never had a single thought about leaving Kris and Ralsei behind).

A child like Monster Kid was clearly naive in UT. They said how they want to be like Undyne when they grow up (all Lancer said was how he wanted to be like Susie, without the "when I grow up" part). Not only that, but Monster Kid isn't even old enough to fight and needs Undyne to protect them, while Lancer is a skilled fighter compared to the rest of the Card Kingdom inhabitants (minus his father). Lancer, as immature as he sometimes is (and for a good reason, if we consider his upbringing), isn’t naive and clueless about the world. Bonus points for his jokes being not only silly but clever and sarcastic. He's like the perfect combo of Papyrus' goofiness and Sans' sarcasm. A child wouldn't be able to ride their bike as well as he does, think of such witty comebacks, or make up creative new words on the spot. A child would babble some stupid stuff, unfunny to teenagers. But Lancer's actually the only person who can make Susie laugh (besides herself).

Now, about this whole 'kid' talk. Lancer, I believe, called himself like this because he sees himself as a child despite being chronologically older. Why? As I said, because of his upbringing and (I think) because his father always saw him as incapable. And Susie addressing him as ‘kid’? It could mean a few things:

1) it was said as a way to mock him for his height, immaturity, or both, and as an addition to the comedy; it's not that deep

2) She thought that he was a kid, but Lancer explained to her that he wasn't when they started hanging out, which would explain why she didn't call him a kid ever again (and called him 'dude' and 'man' instead);

3) It's meant to imply Lancer is 1 or 2 years younger than Susie, but 3 years younger? I don't think so. More than 3? Definitely not.

*I think the first one is the most likely scenario considering she had called him a 'wannabe tough guy’ during their next encounter, while they were still enemies

I respect if you don't like/hate the ship because you see them as siblings, if you headcanon Susie as a lesbian, or if you ship her with someone else. I'm just sick and tired of this reasoning and not being able to enjoy the ship in peace because of people attacking it and its fans.

Edit: There are a lot of things I either forgot to mention, or want to discuss in more detail, so here they are:

-The reason the word 'kid' is repeated so often during our first encounter with him is because someone from the staff accidentally thought Lancer was much older than he really is based on the headcanon voice he gave him, so Toby decided to highlight that Lancer is a kid just like the rest of them (this was spoken of during the 6th anniversary of UT, there's a video on YouTube). Not only that, but Berdly calls himself 'the smart kid', and Susie says something like 'whether you're the smart kid or not, we couldn't care less (referring to Berdly)'. Basically, they're all still "children" (as Queen calls them) even though they're technically teens, and it's not like Lancer is an exception. Heck, Berdly asked: "Who's this guy?" And not "Who's this kid?" because we're already familiar from CH1 that Lancer isn't an adult, so there's no need to highlight it anymore

-Toby wanted to make 4 slots instead of 3 originally so Lancer could be a part of the gang and appear in the status menu, but figured that it would take too much work (from the stream). This proves that all 4 of them are equals; a child wouldn't be able to or allowed to fight alongside teenagers

-Speaking of my previous point, Lancer is a pretty skilled fighter (can throw a ton of spades), he's stronger than a lot of his people (his attack is 7) and also surpingly difficult to kill (during the fight with Susie)

-He acts a lot less stupid than most people give him credit for and is way more emotionally mature. Sure, he's silly for the sake of the comedy, but also clever and sarcastic. You can't convince me, based on his dialogue and interactions, that he acts like a little kid. Once again, I don't understand how those who had played Undertale are now pretending that they don't know Toby's humor is often exaggerated (like in Papyrus' case). It's not their first time seeing someone incompetent and purposefully goofy in his game

‐ If we look inside Lancer's room, we can see that it not only looks similar to Kris and Susie's, (who are, you know, teenagers), but there are also no "childish" things in there, such as toys, posters and action figures (Papyrus has them, and he's an adult). Also, he has a totally normal, spade-themed bed, while Papyrus, again, has one shaped like a car, yet somehow, Lancer is the one seen as a little kid. Sans reads Papyrus *bedtime stories* I repeat: *Sans reads Papyrus, an adult man, or an older teenager, bedtime stories.* NO ONE does this to Lancer.

-Whenever he and Susie interact, I always get the feeling that they're both on the same wavelength. To give an example of what I mean, I'll compare their dynamic to the one between Applejack and Apple Bloom from MLP:FiM. Even though AJ cares about her little sister, they each have their own friend groups. Saying Lancer is a little kid wouldn't make sense, considering how Susie has always treated him as her equal (heck, they even high-fived each other twice in CH2. If that isn't a sign of equality, I don't know what is). I never got the feeling that she was taking care of her "little brother," like a lot of fans seem to think. Even when she tried to save him from the maze, she got lost herself. I mean, who wouldn't do something like this if it meant helping a friend out? Not to mention the many stupid things they did TOGETHER (in the 6th-anniversary stream of UT, Toby stated how neither of the two knows anything about villainy), so it's not Lancer dragging Susie down with him

-This might sound like a nitpick but I think it's important: how Lancer addressed King as 'Father,' and also how King referred to him as a 'traitor'. A little kid would excitedly run up to their dad and say either "Dad!" or "Daddy!" And I highly doubt a kid would be referred to as a traitor

-Susie actually planned to bite his face off, and Ralsei didn't stop her. I'm sure as hell he wouldn't have let a young child get eaten like that. Also, Lancer called him his 'main man,' once again showing that they are similar in age. And if he were really a little kid, Lancer would have annoyed the living daylights out of Susie once they teamed up (ask her to play with him, ask a lot of questions and be overall annoying. Trust me, I've got younger cousins). But instead of that scenario, Susie says "We got bored, so we're having a snack" What does this mean? That Lancer did not act like an annoying little kid, simply because he isn't one. Don't even get me started on how people draw him, because holy hell, it seems to me that 1) most of the fandom is actually blind and doesn't see that he, Ralsei and Kris are all roughly 4 feet tall in the actual game or 2) they try to capture Lancer's childishness by drawing him as a toddler (except, the personality they give him isn't his real one in the first place, considering how he's never acted like a toddler once, so I really don't know what the point of drawing the poor guy like this even is)

-An argument I saw against Susie x Lancer was how "they've never acted romantic with each other" All I have to say in regards to that is how they've literally known each other for roughly 2 DAYS (+ Toby seems to want to make Suselle canon). I can't get behind how people think that love can blossom over such a short period of time. Not everyone believes in 'love at first sight,' and I'm one of those who don't. Crushes, yeah, but they are usually short-lived and always shallow. What we learn about Lancer is that he values sincerity and is very sincere himself (as we can see when Kris tries to compliment him twice) Plus, Susie never had any friends prior to Lancer, so jumping from friendship to romance just like that would be not only bad writing, but also unrealistic. The very reason I love Lancer is how there's no sudden romantic subplot linked to him, like Noelle's obsession with Susie and Ralsei's crush on Kris (I find both of these ships toxic as hell, but I don't want to talk about them here). Just to add something here: despite not moving any romantic subplot forward or being associated with one, Lancer isn't unfamiliar with the concept (as seen in CH2 when he calls himself handsome and admits to 'having fallen in love'). I honestly think that, much like Papyrus, Lancer isn't linked to any kind of romantic subplot simply because he's the comic relief, so it would affect the comedic part of his character

-Why is everyone complaining about this ship, but not a literal child (Frisk, who most people see as 8-12 years old), going on a date with an adult skeleton, Papyrus? (at least, people usually percieve him as a young adult, but he could also be a teenager) Either way, it isn't a small age gap. Also, why is Frans such a popular ship even though one character is a child (Frisk) and the other clearly an adult (Sans)? You could argue that Frisk's age hasn't been confirmed, and skeletons don't age because they're undead, but still, Papyrus and Sans were not introduced as, you know, skeleton boys, and yet somehow both ships are acceptable, but Susie x Lancer isn't? Not just that, but people age Frisk up when it comes to the Frans ship and there's far less hate for it than the ship that isn't even pedophilic?

-People are also totally fine with ships like Dipper x Wendy (Gravity Falls), Aang x Katara (ATLA), Toph x Sokka (also ATLA), Spike x Rarity (MLP:FiM), and such. There is a clear age gap in all of these pairings, but they're not seen as problematic in any way

-I bet that, if Ralsei had a childish personality, or literally any other character, they'd also be seen as a kid/toddler. Even a baby for some reason? I don't understand this. The way people perceive Lancer, when it comes to both height and personality, is completely different from how he acts in the game. Sure, he's loud, flamboyant and obnoxious, but also chill and sarcastic. And sure, Lancer does have the tendency to act dumber than average, but THAT'S THE POINT of a character who's a COMIC RELIEF

-"But King doesn't allow Lancer to say tier-two swear words!" Neither does Greg from Steven Universe, and Steven was 14. You know, a teenager. In case people are curious about which episode I'm talking about, it's "Beach City Drift". Basically, Greg doesn't allow Steven to say words like 'hate' and 'creep'. That's even worse than not allowing your teenage son (who is still a minor and therefore you still have authority over him) to say tier-two swear words!

-"Why does King make his people take care of Lancer if he isn't a little kid or allow him to eat from the Dark Candy tree?" To make sure he's acting like a proper prince and not the goofball he is deep down, if you ask me. And because he doesn't take the poor guy seriously. As for the Dark Candy; once again, eating sweets isn't considered 'princely' and, as I mentioned above, Lancer is still a minor, so King still has the authority to tell him what to do and punish him in whatever way he wants (having to take a shower every time he reads a swear word, possibly being starved, according to a few lines, and even being emotionally and physically abused). Emotionally, in the sense that King belittled him, made him feel worthless, ignored whatever Lancer had to say and used him in a manipulative way to achive his goal of serving the Knight (the first two points are guesses, while we saw the other two on screen). Physically, based on the fact that he becomes worried when he realizes his friends and his dad are gonna fight. I have no doubt that King was phyiscally violent towards him at least once, considering how terrified Lancer is. He knows what King is capable of because he himself experienced his wrath. I see Lancer's upbringing as that of a lonely, overprotected person, who's also royalty. There are a lot of examples of this type of upbringing, whether we're talking about real people or fictional characters (like Rapunzel, for example)

-Zuko from Avatar: The Last Airbender took over the Fire Nation at 16. This makes sense. I don't imagine Lancer being much younger when he took over the Card Kingdom

-"The reason why the guards obeyed Lancer when he told them to imprison Kris, Susie, and Ralsei is that King made them obey his every order!" Then why can Lancer make his own laws (+ he knows what the word means, which wouldn't be the case if he were too young) without asking RK for permission, and why do Lancer's people listen to him without complaining when he orders them not to attack/kill us at the beginning of CH2 (if we attacked the Darkeners in CH1)? King isn't in charge anymore, so it's not out of fear. They all clearly grew to respect Lancer and his authority. They wouldn't respect a child like this

-"In the stream, Toby said Lancer is a boy!" So what? We've got Ralsei, who people call 'fluffy boy,' and Susie, who's known as 'purple girl'. I bet Berdly and Noelle would also be known as 'bird boy' and 'reindeer girl'. Even Lancer refers to Kris, Ralsei, and Susie as 'boys or girls' In the same stream, when they got to the part where we first meet Lancer, someone said something along the lines of "Now it's time to replace the fluffy boy (Ralsei) with another boy (Lancer)" In other words, they're both referred to as boys and therefore must have similar ages. Yet SOMEHOW it's acceptable to ship Susie x Ralsei but not Susie x Lancer

-The Fun Gang (Kris, Susie, Ralsei, Lancer, Noelle, and probably Berdly too) is their friend group, right? It wouldn’t make sense for the five of them to be teens, and for Lancer to be the only one who’s a child. Deltarune is clearly a story about teenagers finding their place in the world

-King wouldn't have trusted a child with something as important to him as destroying Lightners

-The Jack of Spades (the card which Lancer represents) is associated with a young man, not a child

-The thing I absolutely can't stand is how people who headcanon Lancer as a little kid act like their headcanon is canon and somehow think that 'they're right while others 'are wrong'

-Him not understanding what a 'mom' is, if we really want to look too deep into this (which I doubt we should since Toby's characters are often comically exaggerated and act sillier than 'normal'), could have something to do with how Darkeners are created in the first place. We don't know anything about them if you think about it. Whether they are 'born' or not, or if they even age. Maybe everyone in the Dark World will always remain the way they are physically. We don't know yet

-Queen adopting him in order to take care of him makes sense, considering he is, you know, a minor. Saying he doesn't need a mother figure is like saying Kris doesn't need Toriel

-In the live stream I mentioned earlier, the team talked about Lancer's original concept art, and announced how he was originally going to ride a motorcycle (making him 16). I don't imagine that they'd age him down from 16 to, let's say, 10 years old ↓

-Another thing that might contribute to people seeing him as a "little kid" is his design. What I mean by this is how Lancer's "eyes" (if that face he made was canon and not just a meme) are not in alignment with the eyes of, let's say, Kris and Ralsei. I'm certain this has to do with his species (the spade he has for a head isn't a hoodie but a part of his body; I came to this conclusion after I saw how he can move the top part of his head up and down when he's happy/sad, kind of like what a dog does with its ears). And, let's imagine for a moment that the rest of the gang were the same species as Lancer; they'd all be the same height then, if we apply logic here. They'd also all be the same height if everyone were a human/goat/dino. In other words, Lancer is of completely average height for a spade. There's this logic going on in the fandom that, since Lancer isn't that tall + is goofy + isn't skinny, he's a little kid. But if he weren't chubby or immature, even if he remained on the shorter side, I 95% believe he'd be drawn normally, just like Kris is drawn

-I'm no good at math and numbers, but let's try to think logically once again. In Berdly's flashback, he and Noelle are seen participating in the spelling bee, making them 8 years old (that's the youngest kids can be in order to participate). In the present moment, they're roughly twice the size they used to be back then, right? That would make them around 15 or 16 currently, because 8+8=16. The exact same comparison can be linked to Lancer. When he was 8, he was shorter than he is now, as a teen ↓

-Also, here's a comparison of Monster Kid, Frisk, Sans, Lancer and Kris. It's clear, looking at the image below, that the first two are children, that Sans is a simply short adult, while the last two are teens ↓

-In the stream, Toby showed us some more concept art for Lancer. In this particular picture, we can see that he used Kris' height to design Lancer. Since we know Kris is a teenager, that must mean that Lancer is one too ↓ 

-Why does everyone think Lancer is younger than Susie? He could be older than her, but we don't know it, and probably never will because ages in UT were never canonized either

-"But Lancer looks up to Susie so he must be a lot younger!" I once again have to draw parallels between two fandoms. In Kung Fu Panda, Po looks up to Tigress even though they're on the same team and have similar ages. There's nothing weird about looking up to someone, whether they're older, younger, or the same age as you. Lancer idolizes Susie because she's tough, tall and physically strong (I repeat, it's all because of her species and NOT because she's older). Her age has nothing to do with her physical appearance

-Also, why do people think that when someone says 'I ship these two characters,' that automatically means they want them to do something sexual? Ships can be just romantic and sweet, you know?

-During the sleepover after chapter 2's pacifist route, Susie mentions how cool it would be if Ralsei and Lancer could come to visit the Light World and explains how Ralsei could be mistaken for Kris' cousin, as well as how Lancer would live under Kris' bed. Right after this, she excitedly says how all of them could walk to school together and be an unstoppable team. This is proof that all four of them are not only high schoolers, but also that the age gap between them isn't larger than 1 year (sophomores are between ages 15-16, so that would mean that Lancer (and probably Ralsei) is 15, while the other two are either 15 or 16). They must be sophomores because Catti has a job (Berdly too); you have to be 16, at least. Maybe 15. But definitely not younger than that. Again, no pedophilia here

-A little theory I have is that, in the end credits of the final chapter, we'll finally get to see Lancer riding a real motorcycle, but that's just what I'm hoping to see, and it may or may not age well. This would mean that he would have turned 16 by the end of the game

-Typical teeage behavior ↓

-And, most imporantly, THE TIME THE GAME ACTUALLY DEBUNKED IT. Now, I don't know how many people actually payed attention to this little moment (I found it on accident) ↓

Let's break this down into a few segments to understand it better: Lancer challenges Kris, Susie, and Ralsei to a race to their new rooms. Instead of saying "the last one there is a rotten egg," he, for the sake of the comedy and his unique speech pattern, says "the last one there is a fresh and fragrant egg" We can say that there is no deeper meaning behind this particular choice of words, but to me, a "fresh and fragrant egg" represents youth (adolescence).

Ralsei asks him why he's standing if they're supposed to be racing, and Lancer replies with: "I wanna be the egg!" According to my interpretation, he's trying to say how he wants to be "the loser," "the failure," "the underdog," or something similar. In other words, he wants to be the last/the worst.

Finally, he adds: "You won't get through your teen years without at least one Egg." Whether this is referring to how he wants to experience failure/ being the loser and finds it to be an important/essential part of growing up, or maybe there's some other meaning behind being an "Egg," it's clear as day now that he's a teenager. Any of them (Kris, Susie Ralsei, or Lancer) could have been "the egg" in this race if they had ended up last. We know that the other three are teens, and if Lancer is saying how he wants to experience being "the egg," and associates it as an essential part of being a teen, that means he's in the same boat as the others and is also a teen. "One Egg" is probably linked to failure as well, so if we translated the dialogue into a non-metaphorical one, it would go something like this:

"The last one there is a loser!"

"I wanna be the loser! You won't get through your teen years without being the loser at least once!"

So yeah, that's all the reasons why Lancer is NOT a little kid. Thanks to anyone who read all this. And if you're still gonna be a hater, then ok. Waste your time insulting random people on the internet and make them feel terrible about themselves for having an opinion (though, it's not even an opinion after the final point) about a work of fiction, instead of enjoying the things you want to enjoy and minding your own business

P.S. I may have forgotten to mention a few more arguments: 1) Lancer is strong enough to carry Susie's entire weight on his back/head; what little kid could do that? 2) Lancer's attacks are numerous and strong enough to make SUSIE, THE PHYSICALLY STRONGEST member of the team, FLINCH. 3) At the hospital, Rudy mentions something about Noelle playing a "children's" game, I think it was in ch2, gotta go check, but the point is, Rudy (and Queen, by calling them children a few times) considers these teenagers to be "children" Which honestly makes a lot of sense since they're all still under 18. 4) There is not a SINGLE "little kid" in this entire game. Let's see here... we have Kris, Ralsei, Susie, Noelle, Berdly, Temmie, Monster Teen, Snowy, Catti and Jockington... who are ALL 'big kids' (teenagers). And you're trying to tell me the only person who's 10 years old is Lancer?? Get outta here. 5) It makes sense that Deltarune is about teens. Why? Because it is supposed to be a 'more mature' game than Undertale. Teenagers go through all the stuff DT characters go through (family problems, depression, loneliness, crushes, feeling clueless about who you truly are etc.) Lancer has family problems, he used to be lonely, and he was completely misguided because of his dad. Typical teenage problems he's experiencing here. 6) I don't expect a kid who's 10 years old or less to be into motorcycles. That's logically a teen thing. Otherwise we'd see him ride normally on a bicycle with a helmet on, just wanting to play, like, you know, a child. 7) Oh yeah, and Toriel mentioned something about Susie being a bad influence on Kris, so there's that. Lancer and Noelle ("I wish I could do crazy stuff like you...") willingly look up to Susie, while Kris and Ralsei are unwillingly influenced by her (at least, Ral was). This is called *peer pressure* Because they're all teens. But Susie's dominant. So... yeah.

Anyway, I don't care what people ship. I'm fine if you hate susancer. It's not for everyone. What DOES piss me off so much though is the lack of respect Lancer gets, how he's treated as this "bouncy little pumpkin uwu" despite being one of, if not, the most useful character in the game plot-wise so far + a great comedic relief. I'm sick of him being drawn and treated as a toddler. So sick of it.

I get that the kids in the fandom still lack critical thinking, but older teens and adults, too?

In any case, I'm signing off for real this time. Thanks for reading.